#i was thinking of it again how he gendered her correctly
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The fact that Lechero is a trans ally WHILE catholic and DURING 2007 is as insane as it is based. Even if Pistachio got extremely underused. But that's a theme on Sona.
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asfdhgsdkjhgb · 2 years ago
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i dont think ive ever gotten a "she uses he him pronouns" but i have actively twice now in the exact same circumstance just a different year gotten "they use he it pronouns"
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specialmouse · 26 days ago
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yall i get it, i really do, but i also need us to stop saying male/female socialization doesn't exist because the alternative is bioessentialism.
what female/male socialization is:
the differences in the way the parents, family, educators, and general community (including peers) raise and treat a child based on its perceived gender; in a sense, "grooming" the child into gender roles so that they will autonomously perpetuate them as an adult
reinforcement of misogyny and bioessentialism at very very young ages so people have an immediate negative reaction to challenges to these norms as they grow
SOCIOLOGICAL--IN OTHER WORDS, WE (AS HUMANS) CHOSE AND ARE CHOOSING TO DO THIS
what female/male socialization does (or attempts to do, anyway):
naturalizes behavioral differences between "male" and "female" children as innate to their biological sex
pits men and women as biological opposites that want and feel different things, and inherently cannot understand each other
example: at the playground, a girl child falls down and skins her knee and begins to cry. parents rush over to her, start to coo at her, and pull her into a hug. what the girl child learns: when she is hurt, crying will bring help. after having seen this exchange, a boy falls down and skins his knee, and he begins to cry. the parents watch from the park bench and his father yells at him to toughen up. what the boy child learns: crying is weakness, and, having seen the girl rewarded with care for crying earlier, crying is for girls. girls = crying = weakness, therefore girls = weak. he also learns not to go to his parents when he is hurt and to bottle his emotions inside his body. the girl sees this same exchange and comes to the same conclusion, but the inverse: boys = not crying = strength, and since boys are the opposite of girls, girls = weakness.
example: the girl child in the house is expected to help her mother with household chores and is punished more harshly when she does not perform them than her brother, who gets away with doing them haphazardly or not at all, because the mother thinks he doesn't have the capacity to do them correctly. the brother does not understand when his sister is angry with him for not helping, because he sees chores as a female task that he is not supposed to do. he goes on to not know how to do his own laundry or wash his own dishes as an adult, unloading that labor onto his future female partners unconsciously and creating rifts in his relationships.
example: (based on a real study) a girl child is struggling with a multiplication problem. the teacher, also a woman, decides that since girls are worse at math and are more inclined towards the arts, her time is better spent helping the boy child get through the problem because he has a greater capacity for mathematics and will use these skills in his career--when the actual reason is because he is more likely to be taught correctly because of this exact assumption. the girl goes on to continually struggle with foundational math skills throughout her education, telling people she is naturally bad at math, thereby strengthening the stereotype. when she becomes an elementary school teacher, she perpetuates the cycle all over again.
example: (TW: CSA) family is coming over. the mother of the house tells her girl child to put on pants instead of shorts because adult men are coming. meanwhile, the boy child can run around the house shirtless. the girl child learns that it is her fault if an adult tries to touch her, that it is normal for men in her family to act inappropriately with her if she is showing her body, and also her body is inherently "naughty". an older man in the family assaults both the boy child and the girl child. along with the inherent traumas of sexual assault by an older family member, the boy child does not understand why he was touched because he is not a girl, creating complex feelings based around his already lesser view of girls, and he decides not to tell anyone because he does not want to be perceived as weak. he keeps his emotions bottled up, which turns into rage towards others. the girl child learns that she is never safe around men in her family (or men at all) and/or continues to think that the molestation was her fault because she did not do more to prevent it. she tells no one because she is afraid that she will be punished. both children are more likely to develop PTSD, depressive disorders, self-harm habits, substance abuse disorders, and trouble with interpersonal relationships. and the older male figure is never found out.
what female/male socialization is not:
raised female = good, perpetual victim, non-sexist, and raised male = evil, brute, biological rapist that can't be trusted in women's spaces
universal across or even within cultures, societies or households
based on biology
unchangeable within the psyche
unchangeable within society
female/male socialization does not:
make someone into a woman or a man
mean that cisgender women cannot be sexist/misogynistic
make transgender women privileged for their treatment based on their perceived sex as children (quite the opposite usually--"male" children who deviate from the expectations are punished, both by authority figures and their own peers)
mean a transgender child who transitions early is socialized based on their "biological" sex
make transgender men perpetual victims to the patriarchy that can never participate in misogynistic rhetoric or violence
make transgender women into predators
On that note about predators: predatory behavior, such as rape, pedophilia, assault, grooming, etc. are not explicitly encouraged within the patriarchy, and are touted as harmful to it, even though they're actually extensions of it--think about all the conservative men who rage on and on about pedophiles and rapists but go on to vote for them. However, given the few examples I listed above, female/male socialization still does exacerbate that behavior in men towards women. Given that, though, don't you find it odd that, despite both groups being socialized as male, the rates of predatory behavior in transgender women is much lower than cisgender men, even with the stark population difference? That is because even though many transgender women were socialized as male, it does not actually mean they are retaining these messages--in fact, because of their resistance to male socialization, and therefore social ostracization and abuse, they are more likely to be victims to predators. One in two transgender people report having experienced sexual violence in their lifetime.
Male/female socialization is a real thing, based on fake shit. We cannot cede this concept over to TERFs, because it is fundamental to our argument that our bodies do not determine who we are for the rest of our lives. Recognizing socialization as what it is, and correcting when people claim what it isn't, is the key to combatting bioessentialism. I understand the kneejerk reaction to seeing the phrase "male socialization," and you are right to raise an eyebrow. Most people who are actually using the term correctly wouldn't be using it like that. However, I think it's important that we don't write off the concept of gendered socialization entirely. Thank you. Goodnight.
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xiaowhore · 2 months ago
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equivalent exchange.
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DRAFT. this fic is incomplete, as i've stated in this post. this has been sitting in the dungeon for a while, and i have no plans to finish them, but i posted these drafts to not let them go to waste. it is up to you if you still want to read them regardless of their incompletion :) i will be writing my original ideas for the fic at the end so you guys will have an idea of what the fic was supposed to be like.
premise. when ayato stumbles upon a drafted resignation letter on your desk, he doubles his efforts to show you the perquisites of staying by his side.
he doesn't want to lose a competent subordinate. that's all there is to it.
note. what's wrong with secretary kim au but it's definitely not the same because i stopped watching at episode 5 and have no idea what happened. anyways i think we were all expecting a ceo!ayato x secretary!reader fic at some point so here it is. (couldn't keep this gender neutral for plot reasons, so feminine pronouns were used.)
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Kamisato Ayato considers himself a good boss.
Or as far as things go, he's a decent one. He treats his employees well, takes them to expensive restaurants for company dinners, and discourages overtime so they can head off early for the night. He doesn't care much for formalities, and he gets along with his colleagues fairly well. He's never heard anyone talk behind his back or complain about his attitude at work, and there aren't any rumors spreading about him (if he turns a blind eye to the conspiratorial gossip guessing his relationship status).
But he does have minor faults. Like showing a more mischievous side when work hours are over. Getting Thoma dead drunk during dinners because his half-conscious inebriated talking is a form of amusement, or riling up Itto in drinking games just because it's funny. Then he leaves Sara to clean up the mess for him, since Yae seems to enjoy the comedy sketch as thoroughly as he does and probably won't lift a finger to help even if he asked her to.
As his assistant, you're prone to falling victim to his shenanigans, silly stunts that coax out aggravated eye rolls and sighs of exasperation. Years of experience eventually shaped you up to be entirely immune to April Fools' pranks.
He's in the middle of planning another one when he spots a letter of resignation on your desk.
At first, he thinks it's your rebellious phase arriving a decade late. He always found it odd how you never retaliated against his tricks, and this may just be the long-awaited April Fools' prank of vengeance. If it is, it's particularly mean of you—Ayato does have feelings, you know? Even he would feel hurt if you told him you wanted to leave! You shouldn't take this kind of thing lightly!
Then he remembers you aren't the type to make jokes, April Fools' or otherwise, and it's that moment when he feels (proper) fear.
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“[Name] wants to resign?!”
Ayato makes a zipping motion and Thoma's shrieks immediately die down, but the disbelief on his face has yet to wane. His brows scrunch together, brain hard at work in processing this piece of information, though it seems to short-circuit in utter confusion from the sudden blow.
Scandalized, Thoma lowers his head and levels his voice to a hushed whisper, “Are you sure you saw it correctly?”
“I have able eyes. Unfortunately, my optometrist confirmed my perfect vision and assured I saw it just fine.” Woe is he.
“Get them checked again.”
“No matter how much I check, it won't change the results, Thoma.”
“We don't know that for sure, sir!”
“Trust me,” Ayato deadpans, looking off into the distance, “I checked with him thrice.”
Defeated, Thoma leans back to his chair, crossing his arms while deep in thought. “You saw the letter, but she didn't turn it in, did she?”
“She didn't. No e-mail, either.” Ayato taps the table in a mindless rhythm, expression stern but the shape of his lips almost resembling a pout. “Do you have any idea why she'd want to resign?”
Thoma rubs the back of his neck sheepishly. “Is that a genuine question, sir?”
Ayato's head snaps back to look at his companion. “Why wouldn't it be?”
“...Everyone in the office knows you... tease her for your own amusement.”
“It's my way of showing affection.” The corners of his lips curl up, stretching to a twisted smile as he rests his cheek on his palm. “Isn't she just so adorable when she gets angry?”
“You really do have a rotten personality.”
Ayato waves his hand in a noncommittal response. “We're straying off topic. What should we do next?”
Thoma hums, closed fist beneath his chin. “Since she hasn't turned in the letter yet, that means she must be hesitating. For what reason, we don't know, but it's keeping her here. So before she makes up her mind, we should dissuade her from quitting no matter what.”
Ayato laces his fingers together, brow in an inquisitive arch. “And we do that by?”
Green eyes sparkle with tenacity, clashing with blue irises twinkling in intrigue. “We bribe her, sir. It's time to show off your good points.”
--
“If a woman quits her job, what do you think her reasons could be?”
Ayaka blinks owlishly at her brother, taken aback by the abrupt question. It's a sudden thing to ask, especially odd given how their conversation hasn't led to that topic at all. “Did someone resign? I haven't heard anything of the sort, though.”
Ayato shakes his head, stirring the boba tea in his hands. “It's a hypothetical.”
Which means it's real.
Ah, whatever. At least he didn't go for the “my friend...” excuse.
Ayaka warily cuts a portion of her cake, scrutinizing each microexpression flashing on Ayato's face. It's one of their weekly lunch meetings, squeezed between hectic schedules, and they more or less have a silent agreement to avoid discussions involving work if they could help it. But this time, he brought it up himself.
How peculiar.
“Perhaps she wants to change workplaces? If she's exemplary, she might have been offered a better position or higher pay.”
Ayato nearly scoffs at the suggestion. The company, old-fashioned as it is, can only be inherited by a direct line of descendants. Outsiders can only go so far, and being the secretary for the chief executive officer isn't bad at all. Last time he checked, he's been paying you generously as well—how many figures was it? Six?
“Oh!” Ayaka exclaims, holding up a finger as she seems to have figured out something. “Or maybe she wants to settle down and get married? If her work is keeping her occupied, she'll most likely take time off to find a husband.”
Ayato proceeds to choke on a tapioca pearl.
“Or she got married and wants to be a housewife-”
“That's quite enough, Ayaka.”
Ayato would rather believe the Earth is flat.
--
If Ayato were any less desperate, perhaps he would have rationalized that putting together “give her what she wants to make her stay” and “she wants to get married” is a bad, bad idea.
Unfortunately for him, he is grasping at straws, so it leaves him no choice. Yes. Definitely. There is no other option than this, obviously.
(He does not delve deeper into the reason why he doesn't want you to leave, nor does he dwell any longer on why he was so quick to think he was fine with getting married if it was to you.)
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“Don’t you want to get married soon, Ms. [Surname]?”
To clarify, Ayato does not spy on other people's conversations for a hobby, but he's always had impeccable timing. It comes with the job.
He stands by the door, reaching for the doorknob to the break room, but the mention of your name forces him to a halt.
“Why are you asking me that...?” You awkwardly dodge the question, sipping on your coffee. “I suppose I am at that age, though.”
“So you do want to!” The squeal rings with a note of glee, a stark contrast to Ayato's gradually dimming mood. “Wouldn't it be nice to marry a good man? I'm sure even you have thought of it at some point! Are you seeing anyone, then? Anyone you can imagine yourself marrying?”
“No, not yet.”
Before Ayato can even heave a relieved sigh, you follow with, “But my mother is making me go on dates to see people. Said if I didn't bring home a man soon, she'd come all this way to drag me back by my ear and introduce me to her friend's son.”
“Ah, I get that...” Your friend replies emphatically, nodding. “But those kind of meetings hardly go well. And you can't exactly tell your mother's friend you don't find her son attractive, right?”
“Why not just marry Mr. Kamisato, then?” Another one pipes up, to which Ayato gives a mental salute of appreciation. “You spend most of your time together. If you're not married to your job, then you're practically married to him.”
A cackle sends his heart dropping to his stomach.
“Not a chance.”
Can you at least expound why?!
“Huh? Why not? I mean, Mr. Kamisato is on another realm of existence and I can never hope to be on the same level as him, but you look good together!”
Your face pinches to a tight frown. “Look good together? In what way?”
“When you stand side by side, it just looks... right. And like I've mentioned earlier, you spend all your time with him. Why not seal the deal?”
“Mr. Kamisato is reliable, and if you marry him, you're set for life. He's handsome too, and we've all seen his muscles at our company sports day a few months ago!”
“I've never been so thankful for team-building events. Hallelujah.”
Ayato's face burns in embarrassment hearing the dreamy sighs. Even if they think there isn't anyone else listening on them (which is false), shouldn't they exert some restraint at work?
“Please don't lust over my boss,” you assert sternly, voice ice cold. “And we have a strictly professional relationship. So don't get any weird ideas from here on out, alright?”
“Fine. Tell me that again when I'm invited at your wedding, I dare you.”
“I said-”
They wave off your vehement protests at the statement. “Then if you're not into Mr. Kamisato, what do you plan to do?”
Ayato perks up, straining his ears in rapt attention.
“...I'm going on a date this weekend,” you sigh, rubbing circles on your temples. “I'll let you know how it goes.”
Oh no.
--
“-Dinner was nice. We didn't expect the rain shower, but he ran to the convenience store across the street to buy an umbrella because he didn't want me to get wet on the way to the car. He said it would be a waste if my hair got ruined since I-”
Slurp.
“...Styled it for the occasion. Then he drove me home. I found out we liked the same band from the music he played, and we agreed to-”
Sluuurp.
“-Go to their upcoming concert together. Then we somehow also like the same novel that's getting a movie adaption soon, so we also promised to see it-”
Sluuuuuuuuuuuuuurp.
“Could you please refrain from making noise when eating, sir?”
Ayato decidedly does not comply and only slurps his boba tea harder, nearly choking on a tapioca pearl yet again.
As always, you learn to ignore him.
“Concert... and a movie. I'm not sure about the concert, but the film you're talking about is the one coming out in the next two months, right?” Thoma confirms, sweating when Ayato's expression turns visibly grim. “You plan to see him for that long...?”
“Even if dating doesn't work out, we can always become friends, can't we?” You shrug, taking a bite out of your sandwich. “He seems like a nice guy. We get along really well, considering we've only met once. I ended up agreeing to a second date-”
The passive-aggressive slurping persists for the following afternoon.
--
“I've been meaning to ask for a while,” Thoma treads carefully, noticing Ayato's rapid-fire typing—no, striking—on the keyboard, “Ms. [Surname] is good at her job, but you seem really... eager to make her stay, sir.”
Ayato's fingers halt in their movement, and he takes a second to flash his business smile. “Of course. She's a valuable asset, and I'd be foolish to let her go.”
“Yes, I'm well aware, but...” Thoma scratches his cheek, looking off to the side. “You didn't go to such lengths when your former assistants resigned from their post. Or, uh... you fired most of them.”
“Yes,” Ayato simply agrees, still smiling, “she's competent. You don't find anyone like her easily, so it's only natural I'd want her to stay.”
“What do you mean by 'anyone like her,' sir?”
Thoma is awfully talkative today. Ayato might need to feed him something spicy to shut him up.
“Ms. [Surname] is special.” The words smoothly leave his lips. “Does anyone else have the meetings and company events scheduled for the next month memorized? She's the only one I can count on for work matters.”
Thoma's shoulders slump. “Okay, let me get straight to the point. Do you-”
“Mr. Kamisato?”
Thoma nearly jumps out of his skin at the sound of your voice, accompanied by the clack of your heels.
“What is it?” The cold smile on his face finally melts to something more genuine, softer around the edges and looking especially radiant. It's welcoming, like your arrival counts as a joyous occasion, and he is exponentially more attentive compared to the way he lent Thoma half his ear (the other preoccupied with a phone call, which he swiftly ends the moment you walk in).
“I came to deliver some files from Ms. Miko... did I interrupt something?” You gesture to Thoma standing idly by the side, dumbfounded from Ayato's inconceivable behavior.
“Not at all. Is there anything else?” Ayato accepts the documents, noticing your hesitance to leave.
“Ah, yes, I will be asking for time off tomorrow.”
That's... rare?
But it's not a hard request. Ayato's own schedule is blank for the most part, since the latest project wrapped up not too long ago, and the workload is lighter than usual. Missing one work day won't do any harm.
“It's fine, but could I ask why?”
You fidget, tentative as you reply, “I was invited... for a trip on a cruise. He insisted I come since his friend bailed on him and the tickets would go to waste.”
The warmth in his eyes freezes over.
“The tickets would go to waste...” Ayato repeats under his breath, mockingly cruel. The tone flies past your head but it hits Thoma full-force, making him sweat profusely.
Distasteful. An utter disgrace of a man. The magnitude of his ignorance is so awe-inspiring, I have to applaud. I must give credit where it is due, and the foolishness of this clown is truly impressive. “The tickets will go to waste,” he says? His money must worth more to him than his dignity. Inviting Ms. [Surname] to a date on a workday with no regard for her schedule is one thing, but making her out to be an afterthought as a substitute for his original travel partner is another. How shameful. This is no way to treat a lady. If Ayaka were to be with a man of his caliber, I would never allow it.
But what he says outloud is of course, “I see. I hope you have fun, then.”
--
Corporate events are, for the most part, adequately entertaining.
Preparing for it is not.
But the worst part isn't even brainstorming themes, or finding an appropriate venue, or planning the logistics, or writing the guest list.
It's choosing what to wear.
Actually, the cause for Ayato's headache isn't even what attire he'll go with. It's yours.
“That looks wonderful,” Yae praises, looking at the picture on your phone. It displays a silver necklace, a tear drop topaz encased in a diamond twist. It pairs well with the dress you bought with Ayaka last week, an elegant fit that accentuated your curves.
However.
“He chose that for you, didn't he?”
The stoic line of Ayato's mouth twitches and his eyes can't help but sweep over your screen, scrutinizing each grainy pixel.
Though he has plenty of insults prepared at his arsenal, he can't find anything to nitpick about. Damn it. It's a good choice.
“You'll look stunning,” Kokomi assures good-naturedly, smiling in delight. Ayato does not doubt that will be the case, but he's sure he would be in a foul mood the entire night if he were to see you adorning it.
He has already retrieved his coffee from the break room so he excuses himself to his office, long strides that lead him out of earshot.
As a result, he doesn't hear the following conversation.
“Why this, though?” Kokomi asks, looking closely at the accessory. “It's a simple design. Doesn't look like something a man would pick from the rest.”
You shake your head. “I just told him I wanted something blue, and I couldn't choose myself because there were too many that caught my eye...”
“Blue?” She echoes, a simple curiosity. “Why blue?”
“...It's a pretty color.”
--
It is an actual coincidence that Ayato runs into you in the middle of shopping.
You're hunched over a display stand showcasing a variety of earrings, deep in thought as you observe each one. You're doing that thing where you scrunch your nose in concentration, a habit Ayato doesn't think you even realize you have.
“Fancy meeting you here, Ms. [Surname].”
(He wonders what face you would've made if he said “You go here often?” instead. Probably some degree of disgust.)
You blink, correcting your posture and nodding in greeting. You don't look particularly thrilled to see him, but at least you're unbothered by the prospect of seeing your boss on a free day. “You're here to shop too, Mr. Kamisato?”
Ayato smiles amicably. “I am. Were you planning to buy earrings?”
“Yes, but...” Your gaze returns to the display, your own smile faltering. “It is a bit difficult to choose.”
He walks over, scanning the variety up and down. “Is it really? You only need to choose a pair that matches your necklace, right?” He focuses on shades of silver, bypassing the vibrant colors of reds and pinks. Not even fifteen seconds later, he picks out a card and holds it out next to your ear. “This one looks nice on you.”
“Huh? Really?” Perhaps surprised by his swiftness, it takes you a moment to react accordingly. You take the card from his hands and flip it over, eyes widening by a fraction. “Oh. It is rather pretty.” Then they widen further as big as saucers. “I can't say the same for the price tag, though.”
“Hm? What price tag?”
He plucks the earrings from your hands, walks to the counter, and pays for it without a second thought.
“M-Mr. Kamisato?”
“Pull up your hair.”
“Eh? Oh, okay.”
You're so caught off guard that you unwittingly do as he says, tucking your hair back obediently and still processing the last two minutes.
His fingers tug at your ear, warmth bleeding to your skin, and by the time you return to reality, he's already putting the earrings on you.
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STORY FLOW.
ok i lied i actually can't remember shit about this fic so i will be making up stuff as i go lol
what i do remember clearly is that the resignation notice that ayato found on your desk is years old. you meant to submit it way, way back when ayato was tougher on you, and you weren't as well-adjusted as you are now to the job yet. as stated in the fic, being ayato's secretary is no easy task—he'd fired countless people he thought was incompetent.
you fought a number of times, and you didn't know if you could keep up working for a man you thought was simply incompatible with you (in terms of being colleagues/partners).
but over time, you learned to work together. ayato acknowledged your efforts and hard work, and you knew ayato had been trying to give you less jobs to reduce your workload, but you were going to prove that hou could handle it.
what truly made you appreciate ayato more was when you got stranded at the train station. you dealt with a far company they collaborated with, but work ended later than expected, and you'd missed the last train home. taxis were an option, but youd have to go through several of them to get back. right when you were thinking of checking into a hotel, ayato informed you he was already on his way and drove a couple of hours to get where you were to bring you home.
time continued to pass, and that brings us back to the present. you were on the process of cleaning up your desk and left the old resignation notice out in the open by accident, which led to ayato seeing it.
it is very apparent to the others that you two like each other, but the involved parties themselves are unaware of it. you currently aren't eager to get married, but you were trying to meet people so your parents would stop bugging you about still being single.
anyway, ayato bought those earrings for you. timeskip to the corporate event. you unconsciously picked a blue motif for your outfit because it reminds you of ayato.
when you get there, surprise, surprise. the man you were meeting, kazuha is a bigwig, heir to some other corporation. he actually owned that cruise he invited you to and pretended he didn't because you might be intimidated. ayato didn't think the kazuha he knew and the kazuha you knew were the same person, and now the advantage he had over him was ruled out (i.e being rich). (actually while i was rereading i was surprised i didn't mention that it was kazuha...? istg i was imagining him the whole time i wrote about him)
anyhow, as it became later in the night, ayato wanted to get you home before kazuha could offer to drive you back or worse, spend the night with him. ayato acted drunk so you'd tend to him and accompany him home while his driver was in charge of taking you to his apartment. as you were nagging at him, he compared your interactions with him to yours and kazuha's. you were certainly nicer to that man. smiled at him a lot more, too. did you really like him that much?
if you did, could he let you go?
he was ashamed that he couldn't answer it right away. as if he had any right to whatever you do.
you carried him to bed when you got to his apartment, but when you were preparing to leave, he hugged you from behind. do you like that man? why do you want to leave me? why can't it be me? ayato was just pretending to be drunk, but he felt dizzy now, soaked in your scent. he said things that he wasn't supposed to. things that he couldn't take back. things that would change your relationship forever.
slowly, you took away the hands wrapped around your waist. ayato figured that was a message of rejection.
but then you pushed him back down on the bed and you straddled his lap. his mind was silent for but a few seconds before he started screaming mentally.
i've always wanted you, but i knew it was impossible. you have a fiancee. i'm an ordinary worker. your family won't accept me. ayato's mind was in a daze because your face was so close to his, and all he could see was the red, glossy shade on your lips, but he managed to hear those few sentences.
it doesn't matter. nothing else matters. i can't marry if it's not you. if you accept me, i swear i'll make you happy.
from here on, it could be a happy, fluffy ending where turns out, you were tipsy so you were more honest with him and you fell asleep in the middle of kissing so he took it upon himself to change your dress into something more comfortable and end the night with a forehead kiss...
...or you could continue what you were doing and the first thing ayato takes off is the damned necklace so he could replace it with a smattering of hickeys. your choice ^^
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apollosgiftofprophecy · 6 months ago
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I think another reason why I get rather annoyed when people hate on ToA Apollo is because how hypocritical their criticisms are.
I just saw a post talking about how great it is that Annabeth gets to show a lot of emotion, especially by crying. I also recall moments where she got frustrated or angry, and I found myself absolutely agreeing!
But then my thoughts turned to Apollo, another character who shows a lot of emotion.
But you know what he’s called for being frustrated, or upset, or for crying?
Whiny. He’s called whiny.
Apollo gets frustrated when he’s unable to perform something (archery) he used to be extremely good at. He’s upset that he can no longer use a bow correctly.
And people call him whiny for that. Apparently, those people have never experienced, let alone heard of The Gifted-Kid, something all Gifted-Kids (hello, tis me, Gifted-Kid since 4th grade RIP) can relate to Apollo over.
You were really good at something but all of a sudden you can no longer perform it as well? You’re not hitting your usual mark?
Well too bad, according to the fan base, you should shut up and not be so awfully whiny! It’s just archery!
(That was obviously in jest but you get my point.)
Additionally, Apollo never complains about important things. He complains about having to walk, but not the injury that’s literally turning him into a zombie and physically tormenting him.
That post really made me think about this, and then I asked myself; “Why? Why are people’s thoughts so different on Annabeth v Apollo showing emotion?”
It became apparent rather quickly, if you ask me.
Annabeth is a woman. Of course she should be able to show emotion! also maybe deep-seated sexism of ‘women are emotional’
Apollo is a man. And God forbid men show emotion I guess smh so also sexism
Because think about it. How many of the RRVerse male protagonists were allowed to cry? To be fully, and undeniably, upset?
I can only remember Frank crying on the plane after his grandmother’s presumed death, and Grover sniffling/getting teary-eyed in PJO. I don’t recall Percy, Jason, Leo, or Nico ever crying, or really having powerful bursts of emotion.
Yes, yes, Percy and Nico have both gotten mad and unleashed their fury upon someone, but that’s not what I’m talking about here.
I’m talking about letting them feel, letting them be emotional.
Not a burst of anger. But real, genuine character-driven emotion.
The fact that I can only name Frank and Grover from the previous two series is truly saddening.
Apollo gets to feel. To let his emotions flow freely. He whines, yes, but he also gets frustrated, he gets upset, and most of all he cries.
That all makes him a real character, someone people can relate to.
I’ll admit I’m a rather emotional person too. I have a quick temper, and more often than not the water-works come on real quick when I get upset. It’s a normal emotional response, but it can be difficult to work with, especially when you’re trying to stay calm.
Apollo is the first RRVerse protagonist to be allowed to have feelings— strong ones, even. And I can relate to that. There’s a reason why Apollo, Reyna, and Annabeth are all favorites of mine, and that’s because I see myself in them.
Annabeth is prideful. I can be too. She gets obsessed over her work. I do that too. Hates spiders? Oh hell yeah.
Reyna gave me someone to connect with over my sexuality. Ignore that Rick mixed what aro and ace are for a moment please She really gave my demiromantic self somebody to relate with, because the lack of aro rep is criminal. and no the Hunters are not aro rep
Apollo is emotional. He’s made mistakes and wants to do better.
Who wouldn’t see themselves in him? I certainly do.
And yet, he gets called whiny for having the literal rug pulled out from under him again and again, and he doesn’t even let himself complain over what he should, absolutely complain about!
Idk. I think there’s a lot to be said about how this fandom treats emotional characters, especially based on gender.
I guess this is all to say don’t judge a fictional character, because you’re judging a real person too.
And real people have feelings, you know.
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bekolxeram · 7 months ago
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The sheer number of times Eddie is mentioned when Buck comes out to Maddie has been pointed out time and time again. Some take it as a sign that Buck is subconsciously in love with Eddie, some see it as foreshadowing for these two to be romantically involved in the future, while others simply think it's an Easter egg left in by writers as a nod to shippers.
The way I see it, there is a reason why Eddie keeps being brought up in this scene, but it's not what you think.
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If you've rewatched this scene as much as I have, you'd remember that Buck actually isn't coming out to Maddie on purpose in this scene. He originally goes there to talk and ask for her advice, because he feels bad about the hot chicks incident when Eddie walked in on him and Tommy at the restaurant.
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In fact, he fully intends to keep the identity of his date hidden. He can't even risk Chimney getting wind of it, in case he or Eddie puts two and two together and figures the whole thing out.
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Maddie is always there to talk things out with her brother, but she would never turn down a chance to gossip.
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He completely dodges Maddie's question and quickly changes the subject. He needs to tell Maddie the full story of his disastrous date, but he can only refer to Tommy as his date, or "this person". The more he does this, the higher the risk of slipping up, Maddie would likely ask more questions about this mysterious person as well, so Buck frames the whole narrative around the only person he can safely refer to: Eddie (and Marisol, but she isn't important in this story).
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Maddie picks up on Buck's secrecy, now she really wants to know who this person is and why Buck refuses to reveal their identity. Buck again immediately shuts it down, and brings the topic back to Eddie.
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While I'm sure Buck feels bad for lying to his best friend, especially when there's no reason to expect Eddie reacting with anything less than acceptance, when Buck starts actually talking about his behavior and what upsets him the most, it isn't really about Eddie. He's ashamed of himself for lying right in front of Tommy. In fact, he's so upset over Tommy cutting the date short and leaving him on the curb that he accidentally uses a gendered pronoun.
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Maddie "I am 9-1-1" Han makes a career out of being a good and thorough listener, so of course she notices the pronoun. From this point on, the subject of the conversation shifts from Eddie to Buck's newly discovered sexuality, and later, Tommy.
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Buck knows he goes to Maddie because he feels bad, but he still hasn't fully processed the fact that he's into men too and what it means to him. He's still calling himself an ally, a supporter of queer people, but he's confused as to why it doesn't seem to apply when it comes to himself. Maddie correctly points out that he's no longer just an ally, and the recency of his discovery might have been the cause of his strange and panicked behavior during the date.
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This is the prime example of acting turning the same line into different meanings. The first "wow" seems to me like Maddie is finally connecting the dots. She practically raised her brother, it's not unlikely that she has previously witnessed Buck having boy problems. I feel like it's a "wow, everything makes so much sense now" wow. It looks like Buck takes a little offence at it and asks Maddie to clarify what she means by "wow". Maddie tells him it's more like a "wow, this is a nice surprise" wow.
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Oh, boy is completely clueless. Maddie is just trying her best to keep up with Buck's increasingly oblivious statements.
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Buck suddenly brings up Tommy, probably because he hasn't been able to stop thinking about him since the kiss. Apparently, he's so attracted to Tommy both physically and as a person, it makes him realize his interest in men, something no other has achieved thus far. Maddie recognizes the name her brother has been harping on for the past few weeks.
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Poor Maddie must be so confused. First her brother and husband-to-be keep talking about how cool this pilot who saved everyone is, then he becomes Eddie's friend and Buck gets all jealous about it. Most recently, Maddie is horrified by Buck's action on the basketball court, because he only has a history of hurting himself to get someone's attention, not the target of his attention seeking. And now Buck has gone on a date with Tommy? So Maddie decides, one step at a time, let's not get ahead of ourselves. Buck initially tells Maddie about lying to his best friend and how he feels like a fraud, so she tackles (no pun intended) this part first.
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If you come into this scene with preconceived notions, the word "feelings" being in proximity to the name Eddie may seem like to you that Maddie is pointing to "Buck's misplaced romantic feelings towards Eddie". But if you put these lines into context, Buck simply isn't sure of how he feels about his bisexuality in general. In fact, the only thing he's certain of in this entire conversation is his attraction to Tommy. Maddie also isn't bringing up Eddie out of the blue because she thinks her brother is secretly in love with his best friend. Again, Buck originally does want advice about lying to Eddie, albeit partly using his name to avoid revealing his date's identity, so Maddie gives it to him now, no need to read too much in between the lines, especially after the "wow" exchange.
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Now that the Eddie stuff is out of the way, Maddie can comfortably gossip about Buck's new hot pilot crush. And Buck looks absolutely smitten at the mere mention of Tommy.
Eddie is undoubtedly a very important person in Buck's life, and it must be killing Buck inside for lying about something so important to his best friend. Though in this scene, Buck seems to be mostly using Eddie's name to circumvent the necessity of mentioning Tommy's name and to deflect any probing question about his identity. Once he accidently lets it slip that he was on a date with a guy, he pretty much drops the whole Eddie act entirely.
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sgt-tombstone · 4 months ago
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When Soap caught a glimpse of the red and white app on Ghost’s phone, he wasn’t sure he saw it correctly. It was the quickest flash, out of the corner of his eye, in a dark and crowded pub the night after one of the longest ops they’d been on in a long time. Surely, it wasn’t…
But then he saw it again, a few days later, when Ghost pulled out his phone to message Price about something inane, Soap sitting next to him like always. And there it was: Clue Period & Cycle Tracker.
He knew he’d recognized it the first time; it was the same app that his sister used when she and her husband had been trying for their second child, and he’d know the app logo anywhere with how often she’d shoved her phone in his face, complaining about fertility windows and PMS. But, contrary to popular belief, John MacTavish knew when to keep his mouth shut, so he didn’t mention it, despite the questions crawling up his throat like ants.
That didn’t mean he didn’t acknowledge it at all, though. It was a little hard to come to terms with, his hulking lieutenant being trans, but it didn’t change how he felt about him, the smoldering lust (and love) that he felt just by being in the same room as him. He needed to show Simon that it didn’t bother him, that he’d be supportive of him no matter what. That he would love him no matter what.
So, in typical MacTavish fashion, he started talking. Small stuff, at first, comments about how fucking stupid anti-trans laws were or how he’d always prioritized the people he loved over whatever was in their pants. It was awkward at times, and maybe a little heavy-handed, but he was trying his best. All it gained him, though, were confused looks from everyone around him, Ghost included. At one point, Gaz even pulled him aside and pointedly asked if there was anything he wanted to tell him, but Soap didn’t dare out his lieutenant, so he stammered through a denial and beat a hasty retreat.
Maybe he needed to be more explicit. The on-store base sold the bare minimum of period supplies, and he didn’t know anything about Ghost’s cycles, so he grabbed what he vaguely remembered his sister mentioning, along with some chocolate, pain killers, and a heating pad. It wasn’t much, woefully inadequate and almost comically small in the only box he had in his room, but… he was trying his best.
He knocked on Ghost’s door that night, box under his arm and heart in his throat. When Ghost opened the door, he practically shoved the box into his chest, his face burning with embarrassment, and Ghost leveled him with a questioning look as he waved him inside. The last thing Soap wanted to do was have this conversation, but he stepped in anyway, heart hammering as Ghost closed the door behind him.
“What is this, Sergeant?”
For once, Soap didn’t know what to say. Maybe this was a bad idea. How did one tell their superior officer that they were aware of and fully supported their gender identity, despite said superior officer never having actually told them about it? They didn’t, that’s how. Except that’s exactly what Soap had to do, somehow.
“I, uh,” he stammered. Great start. “I just wanted tae-“
“Why are you giving me pads, Soap?”
Soap wanted the floor to swallow him whole and leave nothing but a soot stain on the floor to indicate his swift descent into hell. Ghost had opened the box and was looking over it at him, one eyebrow raised in bafflement.
“I just,” Soap said, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. Was it hot in here? He felt sweat drip down the valley of his spine as Ghost continued to fix him with that same expectant stare. “I just thought ye might-“
“Do you think I have a period, Soap?”
It wasn’t said with an air of disgust, or even derision, just earnest curiosity, but it prickled something defensive in Soap anyway, and he rushed to explain himself.
“Ah saw ye had an app on yer phone and it’s the same one my sister uses so I figured ye were trans and just hidin’ it well so I just…”
He drifted off, words petering out when he registered Ghost’s chuckles. In fact, he was full on laughing, curled slightly over the box still in his arms, one hand raised to his face, pulling off his mask to wipe at his eyes. Hot rage swept through Soap at the sound.
“You bastart,” he cried. “Ah was just trying tae be supportive and yer laughin’ at me-“
“I’m sorry, Soap,” Simon said, schooling his expression slightly, but Soap could still see mirth dancing in his eyes. It was a good look on him, and it was hard to hold onto his anger in the face of it. “I’m feeling very supported, thank you.”
Hard, but not impossible. Soap glared at him through narrowed eyes, crossing his arms over his chest.
“If yer gonna mock me, I’ll take the box back, ye bampot,” he muttered, but Simon pulled the box closer to his chest, protective of its contents.
“It was a gift, Sergeant,” he said, shaking his head. “No take-backs.”
“What are ye, five?”
“Thirty-five,” Simon corrected, a glimmer of mischief in his smile. “And not trans, either. Though I’m sure every trans person is very appreciative of your wholehearted support.”
“Fuck ye,” Soap said without heat. The tension drained out of his shoulders and he slumped slightly where he stood in the middle of Simon’s room. “What’s the app for, then?”
“It’s to keep track of the side effects of my medications,” Simon shrugged, putting the box on his desk and stepping back over to his bed, but not before Soap noticed him pocketing the chocolate. “My psychiatrist recommended it. Works well, even if it gets confused that I never actually have a period. Good for keeping track of trends, though.”
And that… Made sense, all things considered. He knew that Simon took a small handful of pills everyday when they were on base, medications to help with his anxiety and other PTSD-related symptoms, but he’d never thought about the side effects that they might have. His confusion must have shown because—in a jarring moment of deja vu—he abruptly had a phone being shoved, albeit more gently than his sister had, in his face. He immediately recognized the app’s calendar, tracking various symptoms in colored tabs on each day. Most of them were orange, having to do with mood or sleep or energy levels, but some were blue or green, and he wasn’t sure what those were for. None of them, notably, were red.
“Oh,” he said dumbly, a little shocked at how forthcoming Simon was being about all of this. “Ah guess… Ah can take the stuff back then.”
“Don’t you dare,” Simon said quickly, a little teasingly. He put his phone back in his pocket and stepped unsubtly between Soap and his desk. “When your sergeant shows up at your door with chocolate and pain killers, he’s not allowed to leave with them, too.”
“Surely ye don’t need the pads, though, LT,” he said, cheeks heating with embarrassment again.
“I’m sure they’ll come in handy the next time you get shot in the field,” Simon smirked, dodging Soap’s badly-aimed smack with a chuckle.
“Ahm sorry,” Soap said quietly, not letting himself get swept up in Simon’s good mood. “Ah didnae mean tae assume-“
“Johnny,” Simon said quietly, suddenly in his space, his bare hand rising to tilt Soap’s chin up, forcing him to meet Simon’s eyes. They were soft and genuine where they bore into Soap’s, and the sight made his breath catch in his throat. “Thank you. You were wrong, but I appreciate the thought.”
“Yeah?” Soap said, embarrassingly breathless. When Simon nodded, he risked placing his hands on Simon’s hips, heat searing through the black fabric of his shirt.
“You noticed what no one else did and tried to be supportive the only way you knew how,” Simon continued, gaze still pining Soap in place, and Soap really needed him to step back or else he’d be very aware of exactly what effect his voice had on Soap.
“I always will, sir,” Soap breathed, and then abruptly stopped breathing at the darkened look in Simon’s eyes.
“You always take care of me, Johnny,” he rumbled, and the dam broke. Within a heartbeat, their lips met, a slick slide of teeth and tongues and pent-up desire, their hands sweeping across each other’s bodies, touching everything in reach. Soap felt one hand tangle at the base of his mohawk, the other splayed across his lower back, a radiating heat diffusing across his skin. His own hands were clenched in the back of Simon’s shirt, holding him as close as possible as he pushed himself up and forward, as far into Simon as he could get with layers of clothes and skin and muscle between them.
After an indeterminate amount of time—Soap couldn’t have guessed minutes or hours for all the money in the world—Simon gently broke them apart with a palm on his cheek, his hand so big that it covered the entire side of Soap’s face, and the thought made him whine even as he let himself be pushed away. They didn’t go far; Simon pressed his forehead against Soap’s, both of them gasping each other’s air as they caught their breath.
“Fuck, sir,” Soap panted, eyes pressed shut as he struggled to process what had just happened.
“Want to find out what exactly you were wrong about, Johnny?” Simon asked. Soap looked up at him, eyes flying open in confusion, then glanced down when Simon tilted his head with a smug smile. In the scant space between them, he could see the clear tent in Simon’s pants, and he couldn’t have stopped the moan that ripped out of his throat if he’d tried.
“Fuck, sir,” he repeated, looking up again, his eyes dancing with excited lust.
“I was hoping to,” Simon replied, and his laughter echoed around the room as Soap shoved him down onto the bed, his grip on his sergeant pulling them flush.
Later, as Soap laid on Simon’s bed, sprawled and strung out, the scent of sex heavy in the air, his limbs even heavier, he couldn’t help but to be glad, for the first time in his life, that he’d been wrong.
Read it on ao3 here!
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cheesechilifreye · 16 days ago
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Dad headcanons that make little to no sense.
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Bill
Determined to be better than his father at raising his daughter. After growing up in an abusive home with an absent parent. He doesn’t want her to grow up into what he became.
Unpopular opinion — I believe he eventually realized when she was around a year old that he DID have to straighten up for her. That ment quitting the eBay gig.
Gets incredibly nervous when going to public places with her because he doesn’t want to be labeled a kidnapper.
He can get quite stingy with his collections. But as the years go by he’s only kept his favorites and let her have the rest which he regifted to her through Christmas’s, birthdays, or achievements she’s made.
Encourages her (to an almost extreme level) to try out for EVERYTHING in school so she doesn’t end up boxed in like he was.
If him and his daughter fight he remains aloof around her but in his room has a panic attack.
Hates her friends even if they’re good. Can be very cocky if they end up rotten.
I don’t see Bill ever dating again because of the fear of them abandoning another kid onto him.
Once went 2 weeks without eating so his daughter had enough formula to survive.
Loves her smart ass behavior, hates how she gets into trouble
This man would absolutely rip a school to shreds if they called him out of work because they did something stupid.
Keeps pictures of his daughter hung up around the house. But hates getting his own taken.
Loudest guy at any game or celebration because he’s so proud of her.
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Pete
Roughhouses with his kids no matter the gender. It “toughens them up,” as he says.
Pretty sexist when it comes to his kids dating. If his son brings home a girlfriend he’s proud and makes a lot of innuendos. Meanwhile, if his daughter brings home a boyfriend, he’s blatantly planning on murdering him.
Once when his kids were infants they fell asleep on him and he didn’t move. Failing to show up to work cause he was just watching them.
This man has so many half-children. (Like 6. Two of which are twins and mostly boys)
Named them all after horror movie icons or actors/actresses.
Unpopular opinion — Doesn’t care what they watch when they hit 13. But actively shields them from watching rated-r stuff 12 and under.
Makes it a tradition to take their freshly 13 year old kid out to watch their first rated r movie. Even though he doesn’t seem to be too excited, he’s just happy to see their kid look so smug feeling better than the other kids.
Taught them how to fight, cook, and other things at a VERY young age. (Think 5-7) In case one day he didn’t come home.
None of his kids went the football route and he’s very grateful for it. Doesn’t want them to get injured for life.
He’s like the dad who screams at his kids when they aren’t doing a specific dance routine correctly and will LITERALLY perform it.
Man’s pockets are almost empty cause of all the things his kids are in.
Sees his kids as toddlers still (insert Marceline and her dad clip)
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Jerry
Terrified to mess it up for his son. The biggest helicopter parent ever.
Comes to every little thing his son does. Even if he doesn’t understand it.
Struggles to bond with his son because of different interests.
Stay-at-home dad. Makes a little money from Magic the gathering competitions.
Picture goofy and max from a goofy movie.
Is gonna bawl his eyes when he drops his son off at college.
Years after the Eltingville discourse (at the comic con) Bill reached out to Jerry to ask if he wanted to attend his daughter’s birthday party. Jerry happily accepted, even if his son was too old.
He once had a fight with his son that lead him into a panic attack where he screamed and called his son, “bill” by accident. Leading him to tell his son about what happened growing up. His son was much more empathetic after this incident.
Jerry cried when he found out his son wrote his 5th grade essay about him.
Tries to make each birthday of his sons better than the last.
Only time he’s ever gotten visibly angry. Was at a football game where his son was getting beat up by a player on the opposing team because of them losing. Jerry had to be held back and dragged off because of the fuss.
He was fine but it scared the hell out of everyone. For reference now everyone knows you don’t mess with his kid.
His son had the habit of gifting him random objects: rocks, gum, sticks. Jerry has them all stored up in the attic. Expect the live animals which he released when his son wasn’t looking.
Caught his son watching studio ghibli movies and felt so proud even though his son was embarrassed.
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Josh
Thrilled to be a dad when he heard his wife got pregnant.
Let’s his daughter play with his hair. Didn’t want her messing with a greasy mop so he washes it. (Wanted to set a good example on hygiene as well)
Started to lose weight so he can get to see her grow up.
Very protective of his daughter and her interests.
Dressed up with her for Halloween to match costumes.
Hates Mac and cheese (after his incident in the comics) but his daughter loves it.
Struggles with insecurity but deals with it because of how confident his daughter is.
Woke up to her one day when she was just a year old. To her on his chest just staring in admiration. Cried in the shower that day and made it a daddy-daughter day out.
Embarrasses her in a teasing way.
Half of his collection is in a donation bin and the other half is in his daughter’s room.
Nervous but happy she took after his nerdy side.
He fixes her hair in the morning because he knows the pain of curly hair.
Had a panic attack when they were playing hide and seek and he couldn’t find her. She was under the sink the whole time giggling.
Very boo and sully coded relationship.
Wants to have more kids but isn’t financially stable enough.
Found out MONTHS later his daughter mimicked him a lot when she was a toddler. His walk, his speech, even the way they lay on the couch and watch movies.
His favorite home video is her playing house.
He’s a stern but lenient guy.
Against her dating, period. He knows how awful guys are and doesn’t want her around them.
Dreads the day she goes to high school.
Framed her first drawing of him, his wife and her together.
His daughter inherited his anxiety and eating disorder. He feels awful for it.
Spoils her rotten to an extent.
They love family photos.
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dilatorywriting · 1 year ago
Note
Oh, 4k? Hold up then, looks like you dropped this 👑👑👑
CONGRATS TO YOU, ONE OF THE BEST WRITERS HERE!! If I could partake in the event, I'd love something with Riddle and prompt 17; love my short red angry king and alice in wonderland in its entirety tbh. If the Reader could be a bit of a rule breaker too and have known Riddle since childhood that'd be awesome as well. Again tho CONGRATULATIONS!! HOPE NOTHING BUT THE GOOD STUFF FOR YOU!
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Gender Neutral Reader x Riddle Rosehearts Word Count: 2.3k
Prompt 17: "I think I’m in love with you and I don’t know what to do."
[EVENT MASTERLIST]
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You were annoying.
At least, that was the kindest way his mother described it. And Riddle would have to agree. Always hanging over his shoulder like some overeager parrot and rattling off nonsense into his ear just as loudly. He was hardly allowed out to the park—mother said his studies were far too important, and even as a child Riddle certainly agreed. Mostly, at least. Enough to never argue—but when he did get time to sit out in the sun under the shade of the grand, painted trees, you were always there.
A bother, a nuisance. Sticky fingered with the remnants of swiped tarts and chattering on, and on, and on.
“I tried to follow a rabbit,” you said, rolling around in the dirt like a heathen. Weren’t you worried your parents would scold you for mucking up the smooth, blue fabric of your jacket? “But it ran too fast and I fell. Do you think I could catch it with a net, maybe?”
“Hopped,” Riddle correctly, stiffly. “Rabbits hop.”
“Well this one ran,” you argued back. “Faster than a car. Faster than a cheetah.”
“Cars are faster than cheetahs,” he said, turning to the next page of his book. “So grammatically you should have put that part second.”
You flopped back onto your stomach and pulled yourself to your knees, before scuttling behind his back and peering over his shoulder.
“How can you pay attention to a book with no pictures in it?”
He hunched up his shoulders and you dropped your chin down with a bonk. Refusing to budge.
“Some of us don’t have the attention span of goldfish,” he sneered, turning his nose up at you.
“Well, if I could only think as much as a goldfish, I wouldn’t want to waste it on that,” you snipped back. “Doing homework in a park. What are you, a robot?”
“I’m efficient!” he snapped. “Mother says I shouldn’t waste time on frivolities.” On things like you, he doesn’t say. A part of him wants to. The part that sounds like biting words and a sharp, firm voice demanding he get to bed by 7pm unless he wants to rot his brain. Another part is… is worried that you might not like that. And then you’d just get even more annoying.
You reached around and snagged the textbook out of his hands with an audible ‘yoink!’ and immediately ran off at full speed. Which is never fair! Because you’re used to climbing up trees, and sprinting through mud, and scaling boulders like a wild beast. And Riddle is—Riddle isn’t! He would never! So it takes him an age to catch up to you. By the time he does, he’s huffing, and puffing, and as red as his hair.
“Don’t do that!” he snapped, livid. “Ever again!”
“Alright,” you shrugged, a loose grin on your mouth as you returned your pilfered treasure. You’ve barely even broken a sweat. “I won’t bother you during homework, Riddle.”
Which is… That’s certainly what he wanted Of course it was. But it made something in his stomach drop nonetheless. Probably because you’d just find new ways to be irritating. Yes. That’s certainly why.
The first time he felt it was on his twelfth birthday.
He’d tried so hard. And he’d done so well. His exams had all come back with perfect scores, his projects and papers immaculately graded. He’d been going to bed on time every night, combing his hair exactly how his mother liked, even folding his clothes into perfectly pressed little squares. She’d seen it in one of her cleanliness magazines and had lamented how nice the style looked for something so tedious. But Riddle had learned. And now his closet looked as tidy as a militia.
“Can I go? Trey’s whole family will be there. And it’s just dinner. Fully monitored!” he reassured, fighting the urge to twist his hands behind his back. “Please?”
“Of course not,” his mother droned, not even looking up from her laptop. “You’ve been doing well, but we don’t want you slipping up, now do we?”
“But—” he started, and her eyes cut up to him like daggers. A warning. “…of course, mother.”
“Good boy,” she smiled, with that smile that was never really a smile. “Now go up to your room. You can have an extra half hour of free time today,” she said, like it was something worth celebrating. “For my special birthday boy.”
Riddle had sat in his bed wishing he’d never known what a birthday was at all. And then there was a tapping at his window.
He opened it in shock, to see you hanging off the edge like a particularly determined cockroach. Which was—! No! It wasn’t safe! And you were going to get him in trouble, and—
But instead of opening that stupid, fat mouth of yours and letting of your siren call of a laugh—summoning every sensible adult in a five-mile radius to come checking for delinquents—you simply swung around a bit to reach back into your jacket pocket. Riddle almost lurched forward when he saw your fingers scrabble a bit along the ledge. Ready to fall. But then you righted yourself and gently deposited a little, paper-wrapped parcel atop of the smooth surface.
And then you shot him a wink and disappeared from view, no doubt scuttling back down the siding like the demon you were.
He approached it hesitantly, like one would an active bomb. He carefully peeled back the sticky tape and smoothed out the edges of the sloppily wrapped package. Inside was a small, round strawberry tart. Freshly baked, by the smell of it. And the waft of warm, soft steam curling up from the flaking crust. With a little note tucked beside it in your chicken scratch. A lopsided smiley face doodled at the corner, beaming up at a hastily scrawled ‘Happy Birthday, Riddle!’
He took a small bite of the little, perfect treat and his eyes burned. Something in his chest gave a worrying thump-thump.
‘Oh my god,’ he thought in a panic. ‘The idiot poisoned me.’
But aside from the horribly loud ticking of his heart, nothing else seemed to go awry. He ate the rest of the tart in silence, feeling lightheaded and far too warm. He wondered if maybe his mother was right about sugar and myocardial infarction after all.
Riddle didn’t see much of you the next few years. His mother doubled down on his study times, and he wasn’t even allowed to spend time with someone as responsible as Trey anymore. Let alone the person his parent had deemed ‘a menace upon polite society.’ The next time he saw you—really saw you. Not just your hurried waves from across the street or the trace ends of your bubbling laugh from around a corner—was when the Royal Sword Academy’s students had descended upon Night Raven for the VDC.
You were chattering away with Che’nya, the pair of you looking equally as mused and ridiculous. All splashes of raucous color and uniforms so out of place that one would hardly be able tell what institution you were meant to be a part of at all. For a moment he thought you’d walk right past. It’d been years, after all. And certainly you’d moved on to bothering some new stick in the mud.
But then you saw him and your eyes lit up. His chest gave another of those terrible thump-thumps.
“Riddle!” you all but screamed. And launched yourself at him like a feral cat. “How are you! Your hair is so neat! Did you grow out your bangs? Oh! Look at your cape! So cool! Did you know that we don’t get capes? I think that’s a crime. Especially with how yours looks,” you rambled on. And despite that lingering thread of him that demanded that you must be annoying, because that’s what you were. Loud, and uncouth, and everything he’d been raised to not be. The rest of him was… Warm. And happy, to hear the familiar chatter back in his ear.
He scoffed, hoping it would cover the noise of his pounding heart. “No one in their right mind would trust you with a cape. You’d get caught on every door in existence.”
“Oh, that’s fair,” you agreed on a nod. “But surely a top hat, at least?”
And then you were back in his life like you’d never left to begin with. Or, well, like he’d never left you.
Showing up at Unbirthday Parties with the tackiest serving plates and even worse outfits. Telling him all about the rabbit you finally managed to catch, and how it does run, Riddle. I swear. Bringing him trinkets you’d found in small shops that had no practical purpose to speak of. Breaking every rule in the Queen’s Book and smacking yourself on the forehead each time he shouted a stern reminder. You even bought a little notepad to jot down his instructions. But all it ended up being good for was an ever growing pile of doodles and little, folded, origami animals that he’d find tucked all around his room like secrets.  
And amidst all of this, that thumping, bumping pressure in his chest just kept getting worse.
It was a warm day, not unlike the one all those years ago where you’d plunked yourself on his shoulder and stolen the textbook right out of his hands. Now you had your own book to read, some monstrosity on analyzing ravens and writing desks, with your head precariously close to his lap but not there. He didn’t even know why that bothered him.
“This book is too complicated,” you complained. And Riddle fought the urge to point out you were holding it upside down. “Both have quills. Is that so hard to understand?”
“That makes no sense,” he argued back.
“Of course it does,” you said, perfectly pleasant and sure of yourself. “But you know everything, so you really ought to know that too.”
He snorted. “I do not.”
“Do too.”
“Do not.”
“What’s fifteen times thirty-four.”
“That’s not knowing. That’s just math,” he argued. “And it’s five-hundred and ten.”
“See,” you poked. “I knew you’d know it.” You rolled over to stretch out on your stomach—reaching forward to twist a long blade of grass between your fingers. “You always know what to do.”
Something in his stomach turned unpleasantly at that. Had he known what to do when he’d cowed to his mother’s commands and cut you from his life? Had he known best when he’d turned away from your warm greetings and friendly overtures to hide away behind the unsurmountable walls of expectation? Worse over, did you think that he thought all those things were… for the best? That he’d wanted to push you aside like all your cheerful banter and sweet attempts to brighten his dull, miserable life had been worth nothing.  
“That’s not true,” he finally said, stilted and near whisper quiet.
You propped yourself up on your elbows and looked at him with a curious tilt of the head.
“Of course it is,” you blinked, guileless and genuine. Smiling up at him from your place in the grass with that familiar, twisty little grin on your mouth and a brightness in your eyes that never seemed to dim.
“It’s not,” he said, a bit firmer. And his gaze flickered off away from yours. “I think I’m in love with you, and I don’t know what to do about it at all.”
Riddle wasn’t sure what he was expecting. Silence, maybe. The horrible, awkward, biting sort that ate away at his soul like a rat gnawing through his bones. Maybe you’d laugh at him, in that bubbling, carefree way of yours, and tell him that you thought one of those rules of his was never to lie on a Thursday afternoon. That would hurt worse than the silence, he thought.
But instead you just rolled back over with a flick of your wrist, like you were gossiping about the weather.
“Then love me,” you said, simple. “I love you. It only seems fair.”
“…oh,” he spluttered, face lighting up crimson and warm.
You hummed, as if in agreement. But to what he wasn’t sure. You looked him over for a minute, like you were searching for something. And then you reached for his sweaty hand with your own and twined your fingers there in the grass.
“If everything always made sense, nothing would be what it is because everything would be what it isn't,” you said, like that was supposed to make any sense at all. “And contrariwise, what it is, it wouldn't be, and what it wouldn't be, it would. You see?"
“What on earth are you on about?” he gaped.
You burst into delighted giggles and tucked your nose against his hip. “Silly, silly. Stop trying to analyze everything, yes? It will only make things more confusing.”
You sighed and stretched, a contented smile on your lips. You reached up to tap a finger against his nose.
“Things don’t always have to make sense. That’s what makes it fun. And, well, if you’re really that determined to be able to figure out how things are supposed to go, we can do that later, yes?”
“…Right,” he managed to eek out after a long moment. Feeling far too light and far too… too something. “Later. There will be a later.”
And as much as that would have felt like a lie all those years ago—had been a lie even—when he said it now you looked up at him like he’d hung the stars in the sky. And he couldn’t help but hope for all the tomorrows in the world.
.
.
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autumnmobile12 · 4 months ago
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Finishing Touches on Malicious Compliance
Fanart for the Endeavor Agency Annual Christmas Party because I just felt like it.
It's kinda weird drawing them with the height differences in mind and showing how tall Touya is compared to the women in his family. We know Fuyumi is 5'3" and Touya clocks it in at 5'9". Rei doesn't have an official height listed, but we can see in the family shot she is a little shorter than Fuyumi. So I put her mother Grandma Himura's height about the same at 5' exactly.
Also, I don't know if there was an attempt to contain Touya's fluffy hair, but if there was, I think the ladies gave up pretty quick.
Part 2
...
With Touya wearing a woman's kimono, this seems like a good time to bring up gender identity. In the Ambush Sim AU, he does identify as male, but he is not opposed to wearing feminine clothing for comfort/practicality purposes, or in this case, pure spite. So I suppose that's a characteristic that skews more demi-masculine(?) orientation. Except I think if anybody tries to pin down exactly how Touya identifies, all they're gonna get is a shrug because he is long past the point of caring about labels. When it comes to gender identity and which public restroom to use, Touya is very much in Camp 'Just Wash Your Hands When You're Done And We'll Get Along Fine.' So while wearing a woman's kimono may have started out as malicious compliance against his father, it may also have served as some self-realization for him. Here, he's a teenager who missed out on three years of mental/physical/emotional development and figuring himself out. And he has a very encouraging and understanding grandmother.
In any case, I hope I'm using the demi-masculine term correctly. I know someone in real life who identifies as demi-feminine, and she said this was accurate, so I'm trusting her opinion.
...
You would not believe the amount of research I put into drawing their kimono accurately according to situation/season. Because kimono do have seasonal patterns/colors and are varied by formality, age, and sometimes marital status of the wearer.
So breaking down the kimono in the fanart to the best of my understanding:
All three of them are wearing homoungi, a semi-formal to formal kimono that is typically worn by guests to formal parties, such as a wedding, graduation ceremony, dinner party, etc. Since the Endeavor Agency Christmas party is a company event, I figured it would be considered semi-formal. Homoungi are generally characterized by having a pattern along the hem, sleeves, and over the left shoulder seam.
The kimono colors:
With winter colors, shades of red are popular, but otherwise, more neutral colors work just as well. Since Grandma Himura is an elderly widow, I thought dark green would be a good choice since it's not flashy and more what you'd expect a dignified older woman to wear. (That's a cultural thing, not my personal opinion!) The pattern on hers is bamboo stalks and leaves. Fuyumi's kimono is white with bare branches and camellia blossoms. Touya's is a wintry blue (actually, that's same color as the rindou flowers) and has a roughly drawn yukiwa motif. Yukiwa is a Japanese pattern made to resemble snowflakes or flowers.
Obi:
Again, neutral colors/patterns. Or at least ones that complement the kimono. Fuyumi's scarlet one matches the flowers. Touya's is black lacquer (urushi) with abstract silver embroidery. Grandma Himura's obi is white for snow with abstract flowers in silver embroidery.
Kanzashi:
Again, winter-themed hair pieces, so Touya's is a carnation arrangement hana-kanzanshi and Fuyumi has a camellia. Touya's also wearing a wisteria kanzashi, which I don't think are considered winter flowers, but I like the look of them, so they were included. If you look closely, they also have little bells. Grandma Himura's is mostly hidden because of how she's standing, but she's wearing a tama-kanzashi and a kushi.
Deepest apologies for any inaccuracies above. I am not a kimono expert and I did the best I could with what I had to work with.
...
I realized something rather sad while drawing this. In The Summer Camp Ambush Simulation, it's mentioned Grandma Himura died a few weeks after Touya's eighteenth birthday, so he can't be any older than sixteen or seventeen in this fanart. Since I don't think he made any public appearances so soon after returning home, he's more likely seventeen years old here.
Seventeen years old, it's Christmas, and he has a January birthday. So Grandma Himura dies in maybe two months after this, and I swear I did not intentionally set it up to be that tragic!
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betterfettered · 2 years ago
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Ok but imagine if the Mc they got was religious.
Like daily prayers, church going. Pretty much full fledged christian ending up in devildom with literal demons.
•Religious!mc who devoted their life to christ getting railed by the demon bros (especially lucifer).
•Religious!mc who was saving themself for marriage can no longer do so after her nights with the boys.
•Religious!mc who wore a cross necklace clutching it around her neck as they get railed from behind.
•Religious mc! who prays for forgiveness after begging for more the night before.
(I’m sorry but corruption kink is top teir + first time doing something like this so idk if it’s like worded correctly)
Anonnamin this ask gels so well with another one that I got about a super sweet MC from my moon anon!
Alright, but imagine this. A cute little reader who is just SUCH a softie Like, they are the type to help old ladies cross the street, volunteer at soup kitchens, work at a bakery, always give the brothers random little gifts that remind them of them, and just wholesome stuff like that. But the poor bby always blames themselves for any problems, like they are such a little ball of sunshine who is always blaming themselves, it's quite sad actually. Like they are always trying to brighten everyone's day and smiling, but if someone even slightly raises their tone at reader, reader will start tearing up and apologizing. They are just such a sweet little thing, and like the entire school absolutely loves them and a lot of people see reader like a little sibling figure. Because of this the brothers absolutely love this innocent cute little reader who only wants to make everyone feel happy and loved, but then their are all the other students at school stealing away reader's attention and protecting reader when they see how obsessive and possessive the brothers are. (Reader has no clue though lol, absentee parental figures gang, don't know what healthy love is ✌) (If the brothers get born mad at reader, reader will cry and isolate themselves because "they aren't enough for them" and "they probably don't wanna deal with me right now", and just close themselves off) Moon anon 🌙
I'm gonna combine the two of them together into an ask about a super saintly MC. 🧚🏿 If you feel like there was something I missed feel free to send in another ask~
It's killing me to imagine a terrified religious!MC waking up and meeting real life villains from the bible LOOOOOL literally wakes up, is introduced to The Actual Lucifer, passes back out again hahahahahha
I mention a trans girl with a dick in this, I don't know if that needs a warning. If you read this and appreciate the warning, please let me know somehow. Otherwise I'm not going to mention this kind of thing again.
(Gn!reader x AMAB!yandere, please let me know if reader is gendered)(noncon)(violence against reader)(gaslighting)(exhibitionism)(drugging)(plus size reader 💖🫡)(blasphemy, but you knew that LOLOL)(18+ readers only please, mdni)(Please let me know if I am missing a TW)[This is fetish content and rape and abuse are disgusting and inexcusable in real life.]
Yandere!Lucifer would soon feel pretty protective over an MC like this, especially because he thinks you're so foolish easily taken advantage of. He would also appreciate how obedient you are, it's so much easier than needing to tell his brothers to do or not do things over and over again. In a sense, he would protect you from things that he would do to you himself: he's not going to let concerned students at RAD take up all of your time because he himself is going to take up all of your time. He's not going to let other people order you around but he certainly is going to order you around. Most importantly, he won't let other people force you to live your life one way or another because you will be living life to his exact specifications.
I think on the other hand that he'd be kind of personally offended by your brand of religiousness. It intrinsically paints him as a bad guy and makes his reasoning out to be unjustified which, even if it weren't a sore spot, contradicts what he likes to believe about himself. I think his real cruelty streak would start to show around how he dismisses your beliefs. The first time you earn yourself a bad punishment from him, he'll be determined to hurt and violate you in ways that you would not have been able to imagine before, shoving toys into you that are way, way too big for only your first time, putting chained clamps on your nipples and tugging them until you are hoarse from screaming, forcing orgasm upon orgasm onto you until you it only hurts, paddling you until you're shaking. He'll ask why your God isn't helping you, but no answer you give him will be the right one (earning a larger toy or maybe another paddle): the real answer is because you like what he's doing to you, it's what you've always wanted, and your God knows that.
Yandere!Mammon would be sooo bad with this kind of MC LOL He's such a scammer that he would completely take you for all you're worth. You'd both end up broke and in trouble because of him LOLLL He has a hard time admitting when he's done something shitty, so he might allow you to blame yourself for things quite a bit, maybe even use your low self esteem to guilt you for spending time with other people at school vying for your attention (I'll circle back to this).
I don't think he'd have it on him to outright force himself on you because you're so innocent and sweet. Instead, he'll probably slip a double dose of an aphrodisiac into a snack he serves you and wait for you to come onto him. Imagine always wearing a religious robe and, after being drugged, hurriedly yanking it up in a daze so you can dumbly grind on Mammon's thigh and grab his wrists so you can rub his hands all over your body because you have no idea what to actually do about being horny LOL After he fucks you until you're satisfied, he'll let you think that the entire thing was your idea all along. If you get way too torn up about your sinful thoughts and behavior he might grudgingly admit that maybe you ate something strange. Circling back to the above, he is happy to take advantage of your guilt and naivete but he does have a kernel of morals deep down.
Yandere!Leviathan would be obsessed with your purity and good heartedness. I don't even want to mention her in this context because she is a child but honestly your personality would align with a lot of the kinds of things he likes about Ruri-chan. It's the ideal magical girl: chipper, sweet, always trying to help others etc. He'd be quietly obsessed with your religious behavior: you might be praying and then look up and see him watching you, or when you are helping people with things in public he follows you around and tries to help, too.
Unfortunately, the more he becomes obsessed with your purity, the more dirty thinking about you sexually will become to him, which means it makes him all the hornier LOL You'll start to notice him staring at your body and giving you lingering touches on your legs and shoulders. When he finally can't take it any more, he will want to shield you from the corruption as much as possible. He'll sneak into your room at night with a blindfold, tie it over your eyes and tell you to just go back to sleep. Obviously you wouldn't be able to sleep through someone taking your virginity, so he'll just try to soothe you as you cry even though he's fucking you way too hard because of his inexperience. You feel dirty and bruised once he's done with you, but rather than comfort you, he'll apologize by insulting himself and saying how awful and wicked he is and how you deserve better. You are always inclined to blame yourself, so even though you still feel his handprints all over you and the weird slipperiness between your legs makes you feel disgusting, you'll tell him it's not his fault and wonder what you must have done to provoke him. Levi is one of those people who says "I am a bad person anyway so might as well do it again", so expect the nightly visits to continue. You'll spend them clutching a cross as tightly as you can and praying, sadly unaware that that is only turning him on more.
Yandere!Satan wants to study you like an academic subject and needs to know everything about you that there is to know, so he'd be very very interested in your religion since it's such a big part of who you are. He also doesn't have as much experience with the celestial realm as the other brothers, so is more open to hearing about what is in your Bible since he doesn't have his own beliefs about it. You would literally be doing "Bible study and chill" with him where he listens to you talk about God and read scripture, and you would be so pleased when he seems like maybe he is thinking about converting. After all, to you helping him see the Lord's light is one of the kindest, sweetest things you can do.
That's why when the "and chill" part comes in you would feel so shocked and betrayed. You're sitting on his lap, reading pages out loud to him when you feel his teeth latch onto your neck and his tongue move back and forth over the sensitive skin while he gropes you. Maybe you're confused about his intention, so you ask what he's doing while he pins you face down by your shoulders, pulling your ass up and against him. You'd be confused and trying to explain that this isn't pious at all when he tells you he doesn't believe any of that shit at all and never did, and the shock would be so deep you don't even cry while he pulls your clothes off and throws your Bible to the floor carelessly like it's trash. Like Lucifer, he's the type to ask something like where it says in your scriptures that you should cum all over his face while he gives you head, or to slap you and actually quote Bible passages about meekness to you when you try to resist, asking if you really even believe what you read to him.
Yandere!Asmodeus is going to think how innocent you are is so cute and try to corrupt you immediately. Imagine you have baked some cookies, and you are going to give them out. He'll offer to go with you and then right before you step into the classroom he'll catch you by your waist, pulling your soft body back towards him until his arms are smushing your stomach. Asmo will whisper with his lips against your ear that every one of these people who is vying for your attention because you're so sweet actually just wants to be the first one to breed you, that when you hand them cookies they just think about fucking every hole you have. He'll ask what hole you'd use for which person until you struggle to get out of his arms and run away.
But even when you're gone, you can't help but think of his question every time you hand out a cookie, or in gym when a girl tries to talk to you and you can see her cock through her pants you can't help but think you want to take her in your mouth because it would hurt anywhere else. It's embarrassing and flustering and makes you want to be by yourself, which is a perfect time for Asmo to come and find you, to yank your robe up and point out how aroused you are. He'll narrate what's happening to your body, explaining it's totally natural to feel that way when you want to have sex, and asking who you saw that made you so horny.
He'll do this as long as he needs to until you are begging him to help you with this feeling between your legs that's driving you crazy and makes it hard to sit still in class. When you apologize to god before begging him to fuck you, he'll tell you that there's no need to. God gave you these feelings so you could act on them. He wants you to feel pleasure.
Yandere!Beel would be annoyed with how you let anyone who wants your attention have it, and he'd dislike how you always trust your god to keep you safe instead of him. God lets bad things happen all the time, so in his mind thats a ridiculous system. Whenever he sees you clutching your cross or praying, he will demand to know what it is you're asking for and try to give it to you himself. He thinks religion and your cross is a distraction from your relationship to him, especially since he's met all the people you're talking about and none of them are that special to him. If he wants your attention, he just cuts in to where you are and demands it, even if that means picking you up and carrying you away.
Yan!Beel will always fuck you when his libido outpaces his sense of control, but when he hears you praying he'll be enraged. You don't need that stuff! He'll try to rip your cross off of your neck, but the chain is too strong so he ends up choking you by it. You'd better say that all you need is him, to calm him down. Otherwise, expect him to yank you around by the chain like its a leash, pounding you so hard that you can't catch your breath to pray or beg him to stop. After he cums he'll just jam him fingers into you, stroking you with his other hand until you say what you want.
Listen I love Yandere!Belphie being insane as much as the next cockwhore, but I think he would actually be really, really kind to an MC like this. He went to the human world often to meet new kinds of people since he loves learning about them, so he'd be really comforted by how sweet and gentle you are while also loving how you hold him while he naps and let him tuck his cold feet under you all the time. He likes your prayers because they put him to sleep and give him good dreams.
What would make him snap is the constant attention to other people. He's often waiting for you in bed, so waiting hours and hours just to find out you've been with other people would drive him absolutely crazy. You might be tutoring a few other students and he comes in, seizing you by your hair and slamming your head down onto a desk. You squirm and plead for him to stop, but he'd still rip your clothes off and fuck you in front of them so they know that you are his. Even while you're sobbing he'll say (loud so they can all hear) that he can feel you clenching down on him, so you must love it. You'd turn your head to ask the other demons for help and see most of them with their hands in their pants and their eyes smoldering with lust. The fact that you'd be in so much pain losing your virginity in front of a crowd that you struggle like crazy and pray to be saved just makes the show more interesting.
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unmotivated-writer · 8 months ago
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Platonic yandere Vile Faculty:
Countess Cleo:
For The Countess to take notice of you and to start to care for you, you would probably have to be a somewhat classy and reserved student. She likes the students who don’t interrupt or ask too many questions during her lectures, after all it is very rude to interrupt someone who’s talking. If you do that and try your best in her classes you will certainly gain her favor (and favoritism).
Her signs of affection may start of small, things like a small but genuine smile when you answer correctly, asking you to stay after class and to your surprise offering you some tea and biscuits while the two of you talk, helping you discreetly when you're having trouble figuring out the answer.
If someone were to call her out on this behavior she would scoff at them and deny it until the very end. ‘Me playing favorites? Oh don’t be ridiculous!’ She would say angrily as she storms off to have some tea/wine with you while she rants about the “foolish” claims that are being said about her.
As things go by you will start to receive hand sewn clothes of the most expensive material known to man sewn and put together by the countess herself as well as a bunch of stolen jewelry regardless of your gender.
She also invites you to all her expensive dinner parties with ‘the rich and famous’ where you’ll be seated right next to her. If you ever were to decline an invitation no matter how politely she would act like you’d just told her that you hate her and that she can fuck of and die.
Coach Brunt:
Good fucking luck with her no matter what she says anyone can see that she is definitely NOT over Black Sheep. She is so overprotective and paranoid that you might leave like Black Sheep did. Expect a lot of smothering and attention from her, she will helicopter parent you to death and infantilize you. Although not intentionally she fully believes that what she is doing is normal and necessary. Trying to protest or argue with her over this will be waived off as nothing but ‘a fuzzy child tantrum’. There’s no way to argue with this woman and most people don’t try for that long since her patience is far from long. Since she is basically a PE teacher she has a habit of keeping an eye on your diet and somehow always thinks that you’re eating too little or that you're malnourished, she will force feed you if she sees fit.
Unlike Countess Cleo she plays favorites a lot and doesn’t try to hide it at all. Why would she? After all you’re the perfect little child and student (doesn’t matter how old you are she still sees you as a kid). Just don’t try to leave Vile and go along with what she wants and you’ll be fine but if you don’t then well…Don’t act surprised when you wake up in a room with cameras all around and your ankle chained to a bed with Brunt crying next to you asking what she did that would make you want to leave. Well no matter cause you’ll never get that chance ever again. Sucks to be you I guess.
Professor Maelstrom:
Maelstrom would be a very tricky and difficult platonic yandere to have on your tail. Nobody, not even himself, could explain why he started taking an interest in you either way he is aware of his obsession and accepts it wholeheartedly. He is a very secretive and manipulative man who can and will twist and warp your perception of the world or yourself. He somehow seems to know all of your inner workings and feelings. You could tell him that you like apples and he would go into detail on how that is connected to your childhood trauma/other issues, and the worst part is that he gets almost if not everything right about you. That of course creeps you the fuck out, which he notices and becomes absolutely delighted by.
This man is the inventor of gaslighting and manipulation if you ever even think about wanting to leave Vile he will know and gaslight the fuck out of you, imagine Mother Gothel from tangled but ten times worse. My thoughts and prayers are with you, you're going to need them when dealing with him as a platonic yandere .
Dr Bellum:
Saira would love a chaotic but smart student, all it takes is a few conversations and she’s already decided ‘Yep this is now my child I will teach them all about explosives and biological war crimes’. You and her would be an absolute force to be reckoned with and when you're not planning the most diabolical evil shit ever she’s showing you a bunch of funny videos of cats. She’s like a mom coming up to you and showing you facebook memes of minions but it’s cats instead.
She isn’t too obvious in her favoritism but she doesn’t try to hide it at all. If someone were to ask her if she had any favorite students she would say yes and then tell them all about how brilliant you are without any shame or hesitation. In her eyes there’s nothing wrong with playing favorites.
She no doubt has at least one drone following you around at all times just to keep an eye on you or she’s watching you from the security cameras all over campus. If you were to ask her about it she would lie and say that she’s working on a behavioral study but would refuse to give you any more details.
Please comment if you would like for me to write about having them all as platonic yanderes at the same time or if you would like for me to write about some other characters!
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velvetvexations · 2 months ago
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I really like the term “advantages” vs “privilege” when talking about more nuanced stuff.
I’m bi, and was in an m/f relationship when the term “straight passing privilege” was a big thing. And like… I really don’t see how it’s a privilege to have had the people in my life be brazenly homophobic in front of me until one of them figured out that I was also one of the queers, and then get split into 1 of 2 reactions:
Selective memory where they went back to talking shit and pretended I was a straight girl
Getting called a dyke and bombarded with biphobia
But, I can also see how looking like a straight couple sometimes gave us an advantage.
I’m in a t4t relationship now where my partner and I are usually perceived as both being women. (I say “women” and not “lesbians” because it’s about 50/50 whether we’re “lesbians” or “friends” with the occasional dash of “sisters”)
I never had to reassert that “yes, my boyfriend and I are dating, not siblings, we are literally holding hands right now, you saw us kiss 5 seconds ago.” I never had anyone be queerphobic to us as a couple, only to me as an individual if I outed myself or got a little too dykey without him around and a homophobic stranger clocked me.
Past me had an advantage over current me, but I still wouldn’t call it a privilege. So yeah, I really like that term! :D
Bisexual who likes the term “advantage” over “privilege” again: I just thought of another one! My partner is on his way to being able to be read as male. Sometimes, if I throw a he/him out there casually, cis people who were using she/her will switch without questioning. They never do that for me, because I’m a nonbinary they/them user who has way too many “female” traits to even confuse people into maybe thinking they might’ve guessed wrong with she/her. But on the other hand, I can pretty easily fade back into the closet in a way he can’t. When he gets read as male, he gets read as a feminine man, and put in the “doing manhood wrong” box. When he gets read as female, he gets read as a masculine woman, and gets put in the “doing womanhood wrong box.” So, he gets an advantage in having a better chance at getting gendered correctly; I have an advantage at being able to go under the radar easier. I wouldn’t consider either a privilege, because getting misgendered sucks and he’s still at a big risk for queerphobia when gendered correctly, but both provide advantages in their own right. Side note: I’ve realized that (depending on how well he eventually passes) this may eventually lead to us being perceived as a straight couple, which means back to the “straight passing privilege” bullshit for me. Yippee!
I also like that term! You've thought this out very well.
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manias-wordcount · 1 year ago
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Hi! I love your Tamaki (OHSHC)/reader stuff, so I was wondering if I could request one. I'd love to have a fic where Tamaki and reader are married and reminiscing about their high school days, thinking about how they fell in love at Ouran all those years ago. Maybe reader frequented the host club or they had classes together, up to you. I just want some lovey-dovey fluff. ♡
Also, I don't really have a preference for reader's gender since I use both she/her and he/him pronouns, so you can make it gender neutral if you want, I'll leave that to your discretion. (I kinda love Tamaki calling reader his wife or husband though. Lmao)
Thank you for taking the time to read my request! Let me know if you want any more details or anything from me, but I'll leave my silly little prompt in your capable hands. Thank you! ♡
Photograph (Tamaki Suoh x Reader)
𝗔/𝗡: 𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗴𝗼! 𝗶 𝗵𝗼𝗽𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝗶𝘁 𝗵𝗲𝗵𝗲 :)
𝙒𝙖𝙣𝙩 𝙩𝙤 𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙙 𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙚? ⇒ 𝙈𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩
𝙟𝙤𝙞𝙣 𝙢𝙮 𝙙𝙞𝙨𝙘𝙤𝙧𝙙 𝙨𝙚𝙧𝙫𝙚𝙧?
𝙗𝙪𝙮 𝙢𝙚 𝙖 𝙘𝙤𝙛𝙛𝙚𝙚?
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Your lives are busy. There’s no doubt about it. 
  Sometimes it’s you, running up and down the country. Sometimes it’s him, living at his private airport between flights. Sometimes it’s you who has to be up and out before breakfast. Sometimes it’s him who only makes it home in time to crawl into bed beside you when you’re good and fast and asleep. And sometimes you can go a couple of days with only listening and leaving voicemails because no matter what you do or when you call, the other person always misses that call you were only able to shave out three minutes to have.
  But sometimes, it all goes away. If you’re lucky, it’s a week. You’re hitting the lottery if it’s a month. But you’re counting your blessings if you can score just a few days with no work and no responsibilities calling your name. And in those days? You like nothing more than to be close to him. And he likes nothing more than to be close to each other. So how do you remedy it? It’s simple.
  You’ll ask to be left alone in the great big house that you share with enough food to last you these next couple of days. You’ll curl up to him on the couch, dressed in nothing but your pajamas. And he’ll hold you tight and hold you close beneath the blankets and in front of a warm, warm fire. And you’ll smile so sweetly when he takes your hand in his and places gentle kisses around the wedding ring that he gave to you- the one that has been in his family for generations. And you’ll tell him how he’s distracting you from looking at the picture book again.
  The one that his closest high school friends made for the two of you just in time for your wedding. 
  “Aww, Tamaki~” You coo at him when a moment you remember very clearly crops up in the album. He doesn’t respond at first- too busy pressing tiny kisses against your skin and cuddling around you even more in that cuddly fashion of his. But that doesn’t stop you from studying the current picture in your hands. “We looked so long back then. Do you remember this?”
  As expected, it’s a picture of the two of you in the infamous Music Room number three. And it’s one of the better ones taken with Kyoya’s hidden cameras when he was first getting into that sort of thing if you recall correctly. The club wasn’t set up to run that day, and so the curtains were drawn closed in a way that let very little light in. But it did, however, manage to spotlight the two of you as you lingered by a beautiful grand piano. 
  The one that currently sits in your drawing room just down the hall and to the left.
   In the photo, you’re standing on the side of the piano bench Tamaki is sitting on, your old flute in hand. The still image of you has your gaze trained on the sheet music propped up in front of you as your fingers press down experimentally on a few of your keys. However, the Tamaki in the image isn’t looking at the music. Nor is he looking at his piano. No, instead he’s looking up with such an adoring expression captured on his face. 
  An expression that he has simply because he’s looking at you. 
  “Of course I do,” the Tamaki in your arms suddenly murmurs. His voice is soft, and the corners of his lips are twitching upwards to showcase an even softer smile to you as he eyes the photo in your hands. The recognition is in his eyes instantly, and it feels nice to once again feel validated by the man you love so much. To see that the moments you found special all those years ago ended up being special for him too. “It’s our first time practicing for our duet. I was so nervous that day.”
  You smile a bit wider as he reveals the exact occasion for the picture. But then you stop for a second and think for a moment. 
  “You were nervous?” You asked with a slight laugh and a raised eyebrow evident in your voice. You recall being quite a bit nervous about the performance that ended up being scheduled a couple of weeks later. But you also recalled being excited at the chance of working with the great Tamaki Suoh and hearing him play piano for you. But it sounded like your then duet-partner, now husband had a slightly different experience “For our…practice?”
  “Of course!” He exclaims as he turns towards you. You’re very suddenly met with a face full of violet-colored eyes and blonde hair as an impassioned Tamaki decides that now is the perfect time for a deeper dive into the story of the two of you. But it’s not like you can deny him the simple pleasure of telling you a story. Not when his eyes shine so brightly like that. “You only knew as a host back then, so I knew I would never get you to like me back if I didn’t impress you!”
  At his words, your mouth parts open in surprise. It takes you a couple of moments to process just exactly what you heard. And it takes you a couple more seconds after that to fully understand the implications of what he just said. And now in your mind, you’re pulling up a timeline in your head. Recalling core memories and feelings and events that shaped who you are as a person. Who you are to Tamaki. And when you’ve gotten every
  “Tamaki…” You call out very slowly, resisting the urge to melt on the spot as he tilts his head curiously at you. Your eyes drag along his face- looking at the man you’re in love with. And recalling all the subtle changes you’ve witnessed as the two of you grew older and older in your relationship together. There are small changes you can see. Little bits and pieces here and there. Signs that he’s grown from the silly, energetic, and oh-so-dramatic teenage boy that you first met. Signs that you know exist in you too in their own little way. Showcasing your growth in both big and small ways. But it makes you wonder about all the little things you might have missed. The little things that you might have passed over. All the little things that were right in front of you, and you just never knew. “That was in our first year…”
  And you decide that there’s no time like the present to ask.
  “Mhm.” Tamaki agrees easily. Eagerly even. Though the smile on his face gleams with the familiar look of nostalgia. Showing you that there was always more to the story than you knew from the beginning. And so you press onwards. And you asked the question that you should asked a long, long time ago. And that dear, sweet husband of yours?
  “Have you…liked me since then?”
  He smiles at you.
  He holds you tight, presses his lips to the ring on top of your finger, and he smiles at you. The bright, big Tamaki smile that makes you feel so warm and safe and soft. That bright, big Tamaki smile that makes you feel so adored and cherished and loved. 
  “My dear…”
  That bright, big Tamaki smile that you learned to fall in love with all those years ago.
  “...I’ve loved you since the day I met you.”
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dresshistorynerd · 1 year ago
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Borderline begging you to not erase the gender non conformity of historical women by applying contemporary lenses of gender roles to them. Gender non conforming women existed then and still exist now. Wearing “men’s clothing” does not make me less of a woman and it’s incredibly insulting to see people in 2024 call women “they” and “he” because they wrote extensively about the misogyny they faced on a daily basis and chose to address and protect against by disguising their female form. Clothing does not a gender make—social roles do. Let’s respect historical women by referring to them correctly—not assuming what they would like to be called these days when we have long since dismissed European invert theory.
I'm assuming you are referring to that historical binder post and specifically this part:
Westner was also buried in men's clothing by their own request.
Firstly, I didn't call Ella Westner "he", not sure why you are implying that. I haven't read much about Westner, but I did try to look quickly if we have any record or second hand information of them talking or writing about their gender. I didn't find it, so I don't know what would be the correct way to refer to them. I referred to them with "them" since that is the pronoun in English language when you don't know someone's gender. By all means if you have any evidence to share how they liked to be referred, do share.
This is for all intents and purposes the same ask I got after my Julie d'Aubigny post so I'm going to link my response here (and the answer to the follow up ask) instead of rehashing the same points all over again. But I will rehash couple of main points since it seems they bear repeating. Firstly, I'm not talking about you, you are not Elle Westner and you have just as little access to her mind as I do. I don't have to assume your gender, you said you're a woman, and certainly I believe nothing you do makes you less of a woman. But I can't ask Elle Westner can I? For most historical people, I think it's fair to assume their gender to be the one assigned to them, but if there is evidence that might suggest otherwise, we should not assume. Of course we should neither assume it's not their assigned gender, it's entirely possible it is, but the possibility should not be discarded that their gender is different.
It's a little silly tbh to say I'm erasing gender non-comforming historical women, when literally in the same paragraph I mention how it was quite common for queer *women* to dress in masculine clothing. This is literally what I wrote:
Queer women and trans masc people, who dressed in masculine clothing, (which was pretty common) also sometimes bound their chests, but unsurprisingly that was not exactly celebrated like drag performances were, so there weren't binders made for queer people specifically.
(I admit I didn't mention the "mannish" feminists, who dressed masculinely, but they rarely bound their chests, and like many of them were queer also.)
What I will not do (even if you borderline beg) is to erase trans masc and non-binary people from history. Assuming all historical queer and gnc people were their assigned gender without extensive evidence to the contrary (for some people no amount of evidence is ever enough) effectively erases all trans and non-binary people from history, since the way gender was talked about, understood and allowed to express, was often so different from our current understanding and usually erased from historical evidence. That is in fact imposing our understanding of gender to historical people. Yes some women did cross-dress in order to escape misogyny, but that's certainly not the only reason people cross-dressed. Especially since many of them, those who couldn't or didn't try to pass, faced even more misogyny for cross-dressing, but they did it anyway because they had other reasons to cross-dress. The reason why cross-dressing can be evidence of queer gender identity (though of course as said, there are other possible reasons) especially in 19th century, is because in their culture the understanding of gender was heavily tied to gender expression. Even today, when gender and gender expression are seem much more as separate things, if you see a person who looks like a woman, but is dressed in men's clothing, you shouldn't immediately dismiss the possibility that they might not be a woman. Yes, they might be a woman who for one reason or another likes to dress in masculine clothing, or they might not be.
You say I shouldn't "apply contemporary lenses of gender roles" to historical queer people, but also that I should in this historical context dismiss sexual inversion theory, which was specifically a Victorian lens (shrouded in scientific essentialist terms) to look at queerness. Sexual inversion theory is not biologically true of course, like it was proposed, but really none of our sexuality and gender categories are. Because while there probably is some biological explanations for our feelings of attraction and towards our bodies (which we haven't really found yet), how we built gender and sexuality categories around those feelings is entirely cultural. So while sexual inversion theory is not relevant today, it is still relevant to understand the historical context, since it was an attempt to explain scientifically their cultural construction of gender and sexuality. And of course the flaw with all these cultural categories is that they can not contain and represent the whole breath of human feelings, and will always leave people out in their explanations, which is obviously true with sexual inversion theory (but also for example our identity based model). But the societal understanding of these things also shape how we understand and frame our own feelings.
So briefly, in 19th century queer identities were emerging (not seen as just behavior anymore) and first queer communities were formed. In the texts of Victorian queer writers the understanding of sexuality, expression and gender are all very fluid. Edward Carpenter (a Victorian gay communist) notably wrote about "the intermediate sex" and "transitional men and women" which he understood as a sort of third gender category. Basically his understanding of queerness was conceptually similar to sexual inversion theory, but he came from a non-medicalizing and queer liberation angle (though like his writings were not entirely free of internalized queerphobia but still very revolutionary for his time). He wrote about this third gender category as a sort of spectrum that goes from feminine men interested in men, and masculine women interested in women, to cross-dressing people and people living as opposite gender. Today we might see these ends of the spectrum as more or less gnc gay men and women and trans men and women, which to him were more or less extreme expressions of the same phenomena. This also aligns with broader Victorian understanding of gender and sexuality, as gnc queer people were generally seen as a separate gender category, often, especially in case of queer men and trans fems, called fairies. As said, certainly not all Victorian queer people would have agreed or felt represented by these ideas, but this does give us some understanding how at least some of the queer and gnc people might have understood their gender.
Maybe I will need to make a full post about how I think gender should be handled and studied in history, so I can just link it to when I inevitably get yet another one of these.
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morganski-19 · 2 months ago
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Eddie and Shannon's story will never not be heartbreaking to me. It will never not be heartbreaking. It is something that hurts so much to think about, and has so much nuance to it that just adds so much depth and pain that makes the situation ever more heartbreaking.
They were just kids. I am older, in this moment, than both of them when they had Chris, and I couldn't even imagine what was going through their heads. And, if I'm remembering/doing my math correctly, I am only a year younger than when Shannon was when she left. Like that is something that is so crazy to me.
They were really just victims of circumstance. They got pregnant, and given the way they were raised, and where they lived, they might not have had a conversation about all the options. And even if those conversations did happen, they chose to have him. So young.
Eddie, having no idea what to do, and with the fear of not providing for his family, signed up for the military. He grew up in a home with strictly enforced gender roles, and his father's actions forced a mindset onto him that he needed to provide, no matter what that took. No matter what he sacrificed. In many situations, that can lead to the military. Which is what he chose.
And Shannon. Oh, Shannon. If you have no defenders, I am dead. Because I cannot imagine the pain and turmoil you must have gone through. To have, what was possibly your only support system, leave without so much as a conversation is hard enough. Then you go and add the overbearingness of her in-laws, who question her every decision. Because they don't see her as a mother, they see her as a child that messed up, or worse, the person who caused their son to make a mistake.
Shannon carries so much guilt for things that are not her fault. Mainly because she was surrounded by people who probably told her, repeatedly, that it was her fault, in some way. Getting pregnant was a two-way street. And birthing complications are horrible in any sense, but not the mother's fault. It wasn't her fault, and yet she felt like it was.
And then Eddie came back. I'm not sure if it ever says how soon after he returned home she asked him to move to California, but given Chris' age at the time, I can assume that it was too soon. He was dealing with PTSD, and feeling like the failure of a father. Just like he said, he needed time.
So did she.
A lot of people demonize Shannon for leaving, and while I am not saying that what she did was ok, I am saying that it is an incredibly nuanced issue. There's also a point to all of this that I haven't seen anyone say, that certifies her love for her son even more. She left because she knew she could. Eddie was back, so Chris was going to be ok.
She didn't leave when Eddie was deployed, she powered through. She could have, we saw her tell Eddie when she found out her mother's cancer came back. Even though he was going to get honorably discharged, she didn't know that. Shannon waited for him to come back so she didn't leave Chris with his parents. She waited to make sure Chris would be loved in the way she wanted, and the way he deserved.
Do I think that leaving was the best option, I don't know. I cannot fathom being put into either of their situations. Again, I am not much younger than Shannon when this happened. I cannot fathom any of it.
What I do know, is that Shannon thought Chris was better off without her. She truly thought that. With everything piling on top of each other all at once, I can't blame her for that. Not when there is so much that led to this moment.
In the short moments that we did get to see Shannon, there is no doubt in my mind that she loved Chris. There is no doubt in my mind that she did what she thought was best.
And after rewatching season 2, I think they wrote Eddie's perspective of this very well. He was hurt in this, and that made him hesitate. But he still loved her, he understood why she left. He listened and understood why she didn't come back. And while he may not have understood why she asked for time again, or for the divorce, I think with some time, he would have.
I do think they really loved each other, at least at some point in their time together. Whether that be before Chris was born, after, or when they were reunited. They loved each other, and so they kept trying.
Their story was just always headed toward heartbreak. If she had lived, I don't think they would have stayed together or tried again. It wasn't right, for either of them. But they would still love each other, and their son. I firmly believe that.
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