#i was there for you when no one else was
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You bring out the worst in me. Iâve been pretty quiet on a lot, I donât really like drama but Iâm wholeheartedly tired of hearing you play the victim when you wonât take any accountability for anything you said or did. You speak so highly of yourself during a period of time and talk so low and disrespectful to the other person. You twist the truth to fit your narrative and self-sabotage. You keep saying other people cheated and used you. I believe you have a guilty conscience. I was there for you during your dark times, but you gaslit me into mine. I came to you sobbing and all you said was to go cut myself. You never bothered to talk to me or read anything I said, you made jokes and belittled me. I tried so hard to be enough for you but you strayed off to someone else and cheated. I didnât know about it until recently. Or I wouldnât have stayed in contact, to be there for you, to give you advice on your relationship that you sucked me into. I wouldnât have continued to listen. I wouldnât have let you play me like a fiddle. You act like a Saint and as if you did nothing wrong. But you donât share the other side, the side where you were toxic. People tried to open doors for you but you didnât walk through them, you just lit fires at the entrance. You canât disrespect and belittle your partner and wonder why they closed your door. Iâm sure thereâs someone out there for you. But things for you arenât going to change unless you take accountability for your words and actions. Healing is accepting and you donât accept. You donât move on. You would probably have a positive mindset if you stopped self-sabotaging. You made me realize a lot in our fallout. I deserve to be heard. I deserve to be understood. I deserve loyalty. You werenât cheated on. No matter how much you try to spin the facts, you had a loyal partner. Who is now happy in their life, trying to move on. You sucked me into your relationship for so long, I saw everything. Every misunderstanding, every word shared, every heated argument. All of it. I witnessed everything. I could have been your couples therapist. And you try to spin it all even when thereâs facts âreceiptsâ to counter your lies and false beliefs. You arenât a victim. Everything you portray others to be, is what you are. Itâs who you are. It isnât okay to treat a human like they are less than dirt. Itâs never okay to tell someone to cut themselves or go die. Itâs never okay to call someone hateful names during an argument or take low blow jabs with information you were told in private to use it against them. I always hoped that you would be the positive person I thought you could be but you keep showing me that you wonât ever change. You wonât ever have self-reflection or healing unless you accept it all. Iâm not saying you are a bad person, you do have good qualities and thereâs moments where there is positivity. But your lies. Your victim act of being cheated on and used and lied to. You did it all, willingly and repeatedly. You never admit your wrongs. I never cheated on you. I loved you unconditionally. I put your wants first and put mine on the back burner. I never tried so hard to make things work. No relationship is perfect. But I deserve better. And I found a better influence. No cheating involved. Time passed and simple communication happened. I found a person who is understanding and wants to understand when things arenât clear. I found a person who doesnât make me feel like I want to die. I found a person who doesnât make me feel like a burden when my anxiety is high, they are there for me and reminding me to breathe. I know all the stories you spin are lies because you threw me into your relationship when things were rocky. I know if you took accountability for yourself, maybe you could finally heal instead of dwelling and entertaining thoughts that arenât real. You said to stay out of your life which I would love nothing more but you keep popping into mine. So maybe stay out of my life? Respectively fuck off.
#heart vs mind#time to move on#toxic relationships#i was there for you when no one else was#you treat me like trash#belittling doesnât make you a good person#stop popping into my life and move on#i have nothing left to say#idc if this sounds mean#leave me alone#i deserve better#you drain the life out of my soul
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EVERY SINGLE DAY there are MILLIONS of characters in their late 20s who get falsely accused of being father figures to teenagers when in reality the description of "weird older cousin" or "step-sibling that moved out before you were born" is 1000000x more apt
#talk tag#IT KILLS ME. REIGEN IS NOT MOB'S DAD. HE HAS A DAD. INGO IS NOT AKARI'S DAD. PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD CAN ANYONE HEAR ME#(not even necessarily to say that ingo is in his late 20s but still)#(even if he was a 30-40-50 year old no matter how old he is no fucking teenager is gonna call some guy they met as a 15 year old ''dad'')#GAI IS NOT A FATHER FIGURE TO ROCK LEE HE WAS LIKE 13 WHEN HE WAS BORN! PLEASE!!!!!!!!#one time i saw that a âperson wrote a fic where mario was like a father figure to luigi.#they are TWIN BROTHERS.#not what this about but idk where else i can say anything about this.#just horrible#also sometimes someone is just An Older Friend like no familial relationship just a friend or acquaintance who is a lot older than you
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"content creator" is a corporate word.
we are artists.
#anti ai#fuck ai#artists on tumblr#please do not call me or any artist a content creator#i'm an artist. a fanartist. a designer. but not a content creator#ai clowns in my replies will be deleted and blocked without response so do not waste your breath#you are not an 'artist' for generating an image any more than you are a chef for ordering from a restaurant. someone Else did the work.#owen dennis just deleted all his blue sky stuff again and i hate that he does that because he makes such interesting comments#about the entertainment industry lmao i need to just. start screenshotting every smart thing he says#anyway thats why i decided to finally make this when its been sitting in drafts for a few months#owen dennis#edit - if you dont know who owen dennis is he's the creator of one of the best animated series of the last 20 years (Infinity Train)#he's very open about talking about art and the entertainment/animation industry on social media and in his newsletter and hes so cool 4 it
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a flower for you <3
#pokemon#pkmnart#pokemon art#eevee#artists on tumblr#my art#anyone else feel like when you draw one of these idiots you have to draw the rest of them#i think i probably will
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calling my lover "mine" but not in the way that my toothbrush or notebook are mine, mine in the way my neighborhood is mine, and also everybody else's, "mine" like mine to tend to, mine to care for, mine to love. "mine" not like possession but devotion.
#nonbinary love#nblnb yearning#nb4nb#nblnb#wholesomeposting#yearning hours#ive been thinking about how some languages dont have a possessive tense#so you dont say âi have a thingâ but rather âa thing is by meâ#and like im not usually one for psycho linguistics and like critical thoughts etc etc etc#but i really like the framework of responsibility/commitment rather than ownership#i think about this mostly in terms of ecology#and relation to land#but i also love it as it applies to language shared between lovers#like i LOVE calling them mine or for them to call me theirs#but i'm also nonmonog and that was kinda weird to square for a while#and it clicked one time when i was talking about my neighborhood and i was like well#when i say my neighborhood or my city it's understood i'm not taking it away from anybody else#its understood i just mean the city where i live#so why cant we apply the same to lovers?#mine in the way i want to show up for you again and again#ok#done now
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The Allegiance of the Ascended Vampire and the New God of Magic
#bloodweave#baldur's gate 3#bg3#gale x astarion#astarion x gale#gale dekarios#astarion ancunin#yes this is about astarion helping gale defeat mystra and take her place with the crown in exchange for gale helping him with the ritual#the âthey can make each other worseâ part of their relationship turned to the max#I enjoy them being reluctantly soft for each other more but from time to time I just think about how powerful they could get together#toxic evil boyfriends. take love and twist it up until itâs unrecognisable#I like to think that astarion approached gale with that offer after realising no one else in camp is gonna help him#and that he can use gales own hunger for power which backfired when astarion actually became emotionally invested in gale#and after gale kept his word despite everyoneâs concerns astarion changed his plan from not fullfilling his end of the bargain to actually#helping gale kill mystra (mostly so that gale could belong to him and him alone. and letting him take the place as a god bc having a god#at you beck and call is definitely appealing. especially one as eager to please as gale)#anyway what I want to say with this is please please please let me kill mystra i donât even care if the weave gets destroyed again
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Ok I lied I have art that was too fun not to share
Listen- I need combative âI hate you bro but I would also die for youâ platonic cumplane
I need Shang Quinghua calling Shen Quingqui a hussy and a harlot
I need Shen Quingqui to respond with a full bodied cathartic âbitchâ I need them to be venting out frustrations every 2 seconds and ruthlessly gossiping the next. I need them to immediately turn on anyone that talks shit on the other.
Pls for my health.
#svsss#cumplane#but platonic#I feel like it gets touchy when romantic but you do you#shang qinghua#I am a viscious apologist he canât do anything wrong in my eyes#he needs to let out his anger#in a healthy way#by healthy that is giving enrichment to local mean girl Shen Quingqui#shen quingqiu#needs to be the full on internet troll he was before he died#it is cathartic bc they have to put on masks 24/7 around everyone else#in reality they are extremely close and deeply care for one another#Shen Quingqui in my heart has cursed out Shang Qinghua and told him to his face he was a talented writer and that is what pissed him off#he has made SQH cry with his cursing complaints (positive)#SQH does help him avoid wife plots#pls#for my health#my art bleh
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pov: when mc đł
#obey me#obey me fanart#art tag#fanart#obey me solomon#i was gonna write 'pov: when you say 'i love you' to him for the first time' but i think the other one still fits#drawing him in between comms and acads#i need to draw him at least once a month or else i'll explode
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pick your battles
#my art#my stuff#art#comic#original art#pride 2024#pride month#trans allegory..... or not even allegory. just trans .... ^_^#i technically cannot come out yet but i don't think the people who i need to not see this stalk my tumblr#i know they stalk everything else like my twitter and my instagram but this might be safe#so fuck it we yap. this is a comic about picking your battles#this is a comic about how for almost a year now everyone at home in singapore has been crying about my sore throat#my terrible fucked up voice. my you know. etc#i came out as not cis and using they/them pronouns in 2015 when i was 14#but no one ever used my pronouns. none of my classmates or friends even up until i left for college in 2020#from 2020 onwards every year i wrote an angry vulnreable essay about how much it hurts that they dont remember#and people would dm me apologizing on their hands and knees and commending my bravery#and then forget about it all over again. id ont mean 'they misgender me and then catch it and apologize and correct themselves'#i mean they dont even get that far#and so you might ask yourself: why have you kept them around all this time?#and i would have to explain that by pure bad luck i grew up in the most conservative close minded community#that all of my ex classmates that stayed in singapore are cishet and upper middle class and chinese singaporean#that i Am the trans person. that they were able to ignore me for a decade partially because there was no one else#so this is a comic about how there is dignity and grace in staying in the closet sometimes#about how not everyone deserves to see you at your happiest. about how some people can go fuck themselves#you know your truth and THATS THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS!!! YEAH!!! i love you
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i refuse to believe that boycotting is hard. my favourite thing in the world is ordering maccies after a late night at work/a concert/getting drunk. yes i do miss it sometimes. but the other night i ordered from a small place near my house instead and it was the most orgasmic burger i've ever had in my life. i very rarely say this but fucking suck it up people are DEAD
#ramble#also only 0.29 delivery instead of 3.99#and chilli cheese bites#i swear to god the best food you'll ever eat while drunk is from the tiny shithole that's open until 4am#if you're refusing to do literally the smallest thing you can do to help then i have questions#it's FOOD. you'll survive#it's not even NECESSARY food#if it was like a chain grocery place and you don't have access to anything else then i would understand#but it's just NOT#make your own coffee for the love of god#when there is NOTHING you can do to stop this fucking tragedy. and let's be honest there isn't a lot normal people can do#and people say to you 'do this insignificant thing just to show that you even CARE'#and you DON'T do that???? what is actually wrong with you#also i've been worried about this since my last post about sbucks but this is Not an attack on the people who WORK at the boycotted places#because it is an absolute privilege to be able to leave your job and immediately find a new one
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this is basically what happened, right?
(these guys are very lucky that everyone at NRC 1) has the combined intelligence of a sack of bricks, and 2) is easily distracted by shiny things.)
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#stage in playful land#stage in playfulland#these two are SO sleazy and i am utterly delighted by them#can't wait to find out their tragic backstory in approximately 3-4 weeks!#fortunately i have like a month to figure out how the heck to draw their hair (spoiler: i will never figure it out)#also. god. i love it whenever leona accidentally reveals his Mom Side.#he doesn't care about any of this but he WILL be tagging along to make sure no one else gets into trouble#once again he has to be the Responsible Adult and he hates it. the whimsical hat weighs heavy upon his head.#anyway this is me so excuse me while i now talk about diasomnia for three hours#but lilia being all 'kids gotta have some adventure in their lives!' is hilarious#specifically because you know silver would NEVER.#100% silver not only never snuck out but he always went to bed on time AND brushed his teeth AND flossed even when nobody made him.#lilia: aww but you should be enjoying your youth! >:c#silver: i am. i enjoy being respectful and disciplined and honoring you as my father.#lilia:#lilia: maybe i'm TOO good at raising kids#you know i was going to say none of his kids would be involved in this but i actually think malleus definitely would#he would not see it as a moral quandry though. he would just be excited to be invited along.#(the only reason he isn't there is because he was busy admiring a termite-infested beam somewhere and yuu didn't get a chance to ask him)#i mean MAYBE if lilia as his single authority figure told him no then he would have some reservations#but lilia's the one who's screaming HELL YEAH LET'S SNEAK OUT AND DEFY AUTHORITY while dabbing so moot point there#sebek would never and he would rat on everyone else. unless malleus is going in which case he's already there.#and i guess if everyone else is going silver probably would too#but he'd. y'know. feel conflicted about it.
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Thinking about human behaviour compared to animal behaviour again.
It's funny to hear people (the older gens) complaining that "kids these days are lazy, they don't wanna work, etc." What do we get for busting our asses? There is no reward. Many will never own homes. Many are unemployed, trying to find work, and nobody will hire them because they don't have a million years experience and a masters degree OR they want people to work for minimum wage??? People are giving up because there is no reward. Why would we do all this for nothing?
Same as a dog that won't recall when you haven't reinforced it with a reward. Your dog isn't going to do what you tell it to if there is no incentive. No, your dog SHOULDN'T listen just because you're boss and it should respect you. That isn't how it works. They don't think that way. And honestly neither do people.
When we went hiking Sprocket wasn't always taking treats gently from me when I recalled her or she checked in and I rewarded and my one friend told me to stop giving her treats. I told him I won't work for free so why should she. And he said "I do things for free all the time because I want to do them," and I didn't say it then, but I wish I had, but if you like doing it, that's the incentive. It's a self-rewarding behaviour. Just like anything else a dog does, like chasing a squirrel or sniffing things or getting into the trash. Heeling instead of going off to sniff stuff or recalling off of something they want to chase is something you have to reinforce. You have to give them something better so they make the choice you want them to make. They won't make it just because they *respect* you. They won't willingly recall off of exciting prey out of RESPECT. You need to give them a tangible reward for that. You cannot possibly expect your dog to listen just because and then punish them for disobeying you.
Yeah, Sprocket bit my fingers a couple times. The one time pretty hard. But she was excited. She knows how to take gently and I reminded her and she tried very hard to be gentle most of the time. I wasn't going to stop rewarding her for checking in with me and recalling while we were off leash hiking in the woods. I want her to know that coming back to me is good and in the event of an emergency I would like her to not blow me off.
#barkin up some trees#personal#the way my friends train their dog is not the way I would ever train a dog#in fairness he isnt food or toy motivated#and i dont have issues with ecollars#but they dont actually reward him for anything really#praise but little to nothing else#like yeah of course he is gonna blow you off to jump in the lake#lake is more rewarding than recalling to you when you have nothing to offer him in return#the way they recall him is that he has to come to them and then give a hand boop#and if he doesn't make contact they keep asking him until he does it#and then no reward#other than praise#which he doesnt seem to really care that much about#idk it just doesnt feel right the way they train him and i dont take advice from them on training#they also basically never have him on a leash even tho it is required by law in town#after the hike we went to the lodge restaurant and luckily we had an extra lead in the truck#otherwise they hadnt even brought one along so they were gonna leave him in their car while we ate#idk like i love my friends and they are nice people but jesus christ
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ty to @icedmatchawoatmilk13 for sending this to me! i may have gone a bit overboard but this was so much fun to fill out/think about BAHAHAđ ill still never get over how perfect the song sarah smiles is for them...the lyrics AND the fact that its an alliteration...im gonna do an animatic about seb and clora to that song one day i swear đ© ((blank template by oakwolves!))
#like fr....'i was fine just a guy living on my own/waiting for the sky to fall/till you called and changed it all doll' LIKE!!!!!#makes me think of seb just waiting/dreading for anne to die but then clora comes along and changes everything/saves anne AND him#ok sorry my squeeing and yapping about how perfect this song is for them is done#choccyart#clora clemons#the hardest part of this chart for me to fill out was the starting arguments one honestly...but i think theyre pretty even LOL#clora is the ROOT of their arguments usually and then seb just reacts to her bullshit......so its a 50/50 LMAO. cause and effect#also sebs pda WOULD be at 100% if not for clora LMAO#and sorry for making seb h*terosexualđ honestly i cant see either of them with anyone else hes just clorasexual tbh#also if i could have given seb an autumn birthday I WOULD HAVE but i needed his bday to be early on in my fic...for reasons...#looking at aquarius personalities tho i DO think it unintentionally suits seb a lot#i wouldnt have made cloras bday in april either if i could have chosen freely i would have done either summer or december#but then again i just recently learned that the birth flower for april is DAISIES!! so its perfectđ„°#youd think i would know this since my bday is also in april LMFAO i like how i only care/do this research when its about my ocs and not me#BAHAHAH priorities!!!
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the other thing about being disabled in academia is everyone is like "yeah we can't do much about the buildings they're old :/" as if "old" being a synonym for "inaccessible" isn't just a constant reminder that the people who built the school did not imagine that someday someone like me might study there
#mod felix#obviously there's some stuff that's way more accessible with like. electricity. like. i can get to the second floor. for example#but like. it's still possible to have. for example. ramps. if you as a culture value disabled people and their work#i miss when i was at a school where 'these are old buildings' meant 'these buildings were built for cows instead of people'#rather than 'these buildings were built for students just not students like you'#and of course this is another one that applies to many marginalized groups and like. many groups more than disabled people#in the sense that like. my school was also built to explicitly exclude people of color. for example#but i speak from my own experience and my own experience is characterized by ableism more than anything else#but like . again if you read this and you're like 'this feels like it applies to me in ways unrelated to disability'#well it probably does.
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mmm throwaway conversation between Dan and Danny that popped into my head that I had to write out:
"You spent ten years being a one-man mass extinction event, then went back in time and fought me, and lost." Danny snarls, arms crossed and throat tight. His mouth pulls back to bare dagger-sharp teeth, and his eyes burn with the familiar thrum of ectoplasm heating up behind his eyes. "If I didn't believe you were half of Vlad before, I do now."
His other self -- and really, can he even call him that? He's half of Vlad too. Two halves severed from each other and welded together to make a new whole, -- snaps his head over to him. Wild-eyed and furious, he looks unlike the man Danny fought before, the one unruffled and untouched, unbothered by the world around him. It's familiar, but not like the way a reflection is.
"What's that supposed to mean." The Other hisses, matching Danny's scowl one-for-one with fangs much bigger and sharper than his.
But there's a reason lions fear hyenas. Danny matches the rumble in The Other's chest with one of his own, and shoves his face close to his. "I don't lose."
#danny fenton#danny phantom#dp prompt#danny phantom prompt#dan phantom#dark danny#not meant for any particular au i just had the idea of danny going 'wow you can tell you're half of vlad' to dan and when questioned abt it#he says; 'if you were REALLY only me you wouldn't have lost' which is fucking BASED as hell. and also technically true#thought process for danny here was 'hates dan's fucking GUTS bc he tried to kill his family and friends without remorse and would actively#rip out his throat without a moment's notice.' some fr 'im going to beat you to death with my bare hands!' vibes rn.#not totally in character for danny but also i was thinking that it got to this point bc dan was goading danny about 'being his future self'#when that's not technically true. he's half of vlad too he just has danny's face and powers. and he pissed off danny enough that he#retaliated. just not in the way dan expected. dan was expecting a physical attack not a verbal one.#danny called him a loser in more ways than one.#also the reason danny never calls him 'dan' in this is because i was thinking that danny doesn't actually *have* a name to call him. bc he'#certainly not danny. but he's not vlad either. he's someone else entirely. so 'The Other' it is.#danny fenton is not the ghost king#<- down here because while its still MY DP post its not DPXDC so it doesnt need to be front and center for people to see it.
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yippee knuckles comic done! wanted to try several things: tell a story in 4-7 pages, attempt to style layouts and writing a bit more like stc comics, and lump my "knuckles raised unknowingly by the m.e." headcanons together. mixed results I think but I still think it turned out nice :)
#sth#knuckles the echidna#sonic the hedgehog#fanart#can you see how i picked up and lost steam over the course of this lol#anyway the basket is not actually a hc thats . a silly#pages 1 5 and 6 were originally the only ones I had strong ideas for#everything else was just. attempting to connect things#i took sooo long making an actual thumbnail script for this and i still needed to change the last panels at the last second lol#also um the layouts def look better when starting the pairing from 1+2 but.#for posting reasons i wanted pg 1 on its own#okay thats all I have to say i think <3#id in alt text#comic
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