#i was supposed to gift you a fic of a ship YOU ACTUALLY SHIP

[russellradio]

~to be updated when I post a new fic, so I have them all in one place~

you can find me as bucksclipboard on ao3 💕 kudos and comments make my day!

bucktommy fic masterpost here

be someone (T, 2.4k) | ao3 | rebloggable

A call leaves Buck wondering if he’ll ever be a parent. Not just a donor, a dad. A great dad. Chimney tries to convince him of his qualities – and Eddie has a hard time staying quiet.

or: eddie thinks buck already is someone to chris

will you remember me? (T, 4.5k) | ao3 | rebloggable

You know the trope: Someone suffers from amnesia and they don’t remember their partner. Well, this is the opposite. Buck doesn’t remember a thing – except that he loves Eddie. How is Eddie supposed to tell him they’re not actually together?

for summer of buddie – week 5: break the cliché

nobody compares (G, 1.3k) | ao3 | (ambiguous bucktommy/buddie)

"Sorry", Eddie said and scrunched his nose.

"No, you’re right", Tommy admitted. "I don’t want that. I want to give him something he’ll love."

"Well, then not a gift card. Look, I’ve been a terrible gift giver in relationships, so I’m not judging. But you look like you’re getting a migraine, so maybe… let me help you?"

A deep sigh escaped him. "How?"

or: eddie helps tommy shop for buck's birthday gift and inadvertently makes things worse

unless you're choosing me (T, 4.4k) | ao3 | rebloggable

"Could you check that?", Eddie called from the kitchen. He had insisted to make something for them tonight instead of ordering their usual pizza and ice cream dinner.

"Sure", Buck replied and snatched the phone off the coffee table. He knew the pass code – it was the day Eddie had started working at the 118. There was no new text, just a message from his phone provider, but an earlier conversation was still opened. Before Buck could place the phone back on the table, something caught his eye. Why was Eddie talking to Hen about him?

or: buck reads a text he wasn’t supposed to read

when it all melts down (T, 2.2k) | ao3 | rebloggable

Buck thinks a beach day is the perfect distraction from an empty house and a lack of summer plans. Eddie thinks if Buck walks out of the ocean like a Greek god one more time, he might just lose his mind.

or: there’s only one cure for a frozen tongue after too much ice cream

I wish I could help (E, 2.1k) | ao3 | rebloggable

Eddie is so pent up he can barely focus on his job – and Buck is all too happy to help. That’s just what friends do.

or: I couldn’t find any smut referring to *that* scene in 7x05, so I wrote it

thanks, babe! (T, 1.8k) | ao3 | rebloggable

Eddie accidentally calls Buck babe and refuses to have a meltdown over it. It was just his subconscious betraying him because they were surrounded by couples, right? Right?!

or: I love “accidental” tropes, how did you know

more under the cut

do you want to know a secret (T, 3.2k) | ao3

Buck overworks himself and his family worries. When Eddie overhears a conversation between Maddie and Chimney, he learns he might just have caused Buck’s change in behavior. The good news is – there’s something he can do about it.

or: maddie and chimney worry over pining!buck – eddie takes charge

it's just the thought of you and what I leave behind (T, 6.4k) | ao3 | rebloggable

As the cruise ship starts to sink, Bobby and Athena aren’t the only ones in desperate need of saving. The 118 goes on a high-risk mission and a close call brings Buck and Eddie together.

or: 7x03 reimagined

I let my guard down for a moment (M, 6.5k) | ao3 | rebloggable

"It didn’t stop. Buck went from hoping the packages were from someone special to suspecting someone was toying with him. The hopeless romantic in him was slowly wilting. When he opened the latest letter, suddenly he was not so sure his secret admirer was of the good-natured kind. "

or: who needs police protection when you have eddie diaz by your side?

hold tight, you're slowly coming back to life (T, 3.1k) | ao3 | rebloggable

Eddie runs into Natalia at the grocery store. He learns something about her and Buck’s breakup that gives him the final push to take care of his own complicated love life.

or: what if buck didn’t tell eddie the entire truth

how's your head? (haven't had any complaints) (M, 2.3k) | ao3 | rebloggable

When he glanced over, Buck had already drifted off to sleep. He looked so innocent, Eddie almost couldn’t believe what had come out of his mouth mere seconds ago. Almost. Because he was 100 percent sure he’d heard it.

or: you can’t just make this kind of joke and forget about it

rose-colored boy (T, 1.6k) | ao3 | rebloggable

Buck is draped across an armchair, rambling about rosefinches and Eddie just can’t help himself. In some kind of out-of-body experience, he gives his best friend a completely casual, meaningless (lie!) forehead kiss.

or: yes, another accidental kiss fic because I don’t think there can ever be enough

we should be at the club (E, 2.8k) | ao3 | rebloggable

When Buck hears that Eddie has been going golfing to put himself out there, he offers to be his wingman. The world’s worst wingman. Although, to be fair, Eddie brings his best friend to the club and leaves with a new boyfriend.

or: just an excuse for them to wear tight pants and take them off

8 days a week (E, 6.3k) | ao3 | rebloggable

A sweet moment of weakness helps Buck and Eddie get together. While Eddie doesn’t expect much to change about their relationship, Buck slips back into old patterns.

or: eddie notices all the ways buck tries to make himself smaller

don't blame me, love made me crazy (E, 1.6k) | ao3 | rebloggable

Steam was fogging up the room and Eddie cursed inwardly. Was Buck trying to cook himself? Eddie wasn’t one for steaming hot showers but Buck ran cold even on his best days and this wasn’t one of those. He must’ve been desperate to warm up and soothe the pain his bruises were causing him. Eddie was suddenly very aware he was intruding on his best friend's privacy, even if he did need help, and decided to announce himself. “Buck, it’s me, I-“ He stopped in his tracks when Buck came into vision and met his gaze. Worry turned to lust quickly. Buck was hard. Incredibly so.

or: eddie joins buck in the shower (plot? what plot)

I only ever want you (E, 2.7k) | ao3 | rebloggable

When a handsome guy flirts with Eddie, Buck can’t stand to watch. He leaves the 118’s bar outing in a hurry, only for Eddie to follow him to the loft and confront him. A misunderstanding of why Buck is so jealous leads to a confession – and more.

or: there’s jealousy, there’s fighting, there’s delicious makeup sex

love is stored in the picnic basket (T, 4.9k) | ao3 | rebloggable

Buck participates in the 118’s basket bidding on Valentine’s Day and things go exactly as (Bobby) planned. When Eddie is done standing on the sidelines, he makes the grand gesture Buck has been dreaming of.

or: buck’s heart (um, picnic basket) is up for auction and eddie is ready to pay

whose peace are you keeping? (G, 3.9k) | ao3

Buck tells Eddie about the Buckley-Han family dinner and how odd it felt hearing his mother call him a “miracle baby”. Why can’t he trust his parents’ support when that’s all he’s ever wanted? He doesn’t know that Eddie lost his temper with them when they visited the firehouse two years ago. Now it’s time to come clean. A call that feels all too familiar interferes but a good night’s sleep brings them back on track.

or: it’s actually incredibly easy to love evan buckley – and eddie told his parents as much

my heart is trying to crawl out of my chest to get to you (G, 2.1k) | ao3

Buck is released from the hospital and while the rest of his family is understandably on edge about his recovery, Eddie throws himself back into work. He refuses to be a part of Maddie’s “operation buck up buttercup” and Hen grows suspicious. Listen, it’s not like Eddie isn’t worried, quite the opposite actually. He just found a better way to watch over Buck, without having to spill any of his secrets. Unless technology plays a trick on him, as it usually does, and his foolproof plan goes wrong. But Buck might just surprise him.

or: the one where eddie takes buck's recovery a little too seriously

and my attempt at rpf if you're into it:

closer than ever – ryliver (E, 2.k)

if you made it to the end of this post, thank you so much for reading!

[koriandrprincessoftamaran]

I get it

E/riel’s have been disappointed & shook since the BC.

I understand there are aggressive shippers out there on all sides with ✨ ZERO ✨ emotional intelligence & can’t help themselves from being actual villains.

All that to say, the biggest difference between Elriel v. Gwynriel/Elucien is we do actually use canon with complete context & build upon that. Canon from multiple series most times. We’ve kept up with the story.. We actually understand the narrative THE AUTHOR is wanting to convey. It’s both.. iykyk

If Elriel’s actually follow cannon you’ll end up with chosen love (if Elain even gives him a chance after that BC), their powers don’t sing or dance for the other, Elain has a bond trailing her forever, & Az leaves Elain for his mate when his bond snaps (bc it’s canon he wants a mate bond. He straight up says he’s envious of RHYS & CASSIAN. Az, quite literally, waited 500 years for a MATING BOND to snap with Mor.).

It’s clear y’all don’t understand that Elain’s treatment of Lucien is NOT unique to Lucien as a character. She’d be treating Az the same way if that bond snapped in Hybern, the same way y’all don’t understand that Azriel’s visceral longing for a mate is NOT unique to Elain as a character.. the same way y’all don’t realize that if Lucien never said anything, y’all wouldn’t have your favorite scene of them sitting in the garden.

I’ve seen a few post lately saying we’ve read too many fanfics, have confused cannon, & that we’re envious of Elriel… that’s what’s prompted this rant lol… This take is rich coming from the ship that had fics with Azriel’s shadows playing/DANCING for Elain, only for that dream to be drowned in a muddy grave in chapter 60 & in the BC of ACOSF.. yet y’all still are out here trying to explain that away or try to spin it as a positive… An Elriel shipper had an artist commission them as Eric & Ariel. At first I thought that commission was supposed to be an uno reverse of irony & apparently it’s not, it was actually for Elriel month & intended to only have one level of irony… Who’s really envious & confusing canon here?

Never seen an Elucien post saying “Darn, I wish Lucien’s power didn’t come out when he was trying to get to Elain, I wish his power was absent around her like Az’s shadows. Shoot, I really wish Lucien didn’t give Elain incredibly thoughtful gifts for solstice & ask Fayre multiple questions about Elain so he could know her as a person. Really wish he didn’t fight his way through a battle field just to see Elain. Actually, I just wish Lucien didn’t think of Elain’s well being at all, he should’ve NEVER thought about her still not eating, how thin she was, & how much that look in her eyes worried him.”

Never seen a Gwynriel post saying “Aw man, I wish Azriel didn’t notice how Gwyn’s freckles crinkle on her nose when she smirks & I wish he didn’t bait her into a challenge like he did with the obstacle course. I really freaking hate that his shadows danced with Gwyn after we got direct confirmation they don’t do that for Elain. Darn, really wish Az thought of his hands tainting Gwyn when we got his PoV.”

It’s absolutely hilarious that they’ll try it when I have YET so see an Elucien proof of ship post that isn’t straight from the books (with the complete context of the quote) & have it not support the overarching narrative THE AUTHOR is wanting to convey regarding a fated mate.. I just.. y’all, it’s okay to be wrong.

If I need to spell it out for you, the overarching theme is ✨ like calls to like ✨ & the mating bond transcends all… I’d hope we all know this as we’ve had to read that saying 832 times & have 832 examples of mates CHOOSING to accept the bond after getting to know them & healing.

We speak with 100% conviction bc it’s OBVIOUS! Elucien’s have been nothing but validated by SJM each time she released a book building more tension for Elucien to explore.. ACOSF was 100% validation for her Elucien’s.. I see Elriel theories & posts all the time bc I follow the Azriel tags. I don’t engage unless the Elriel tag is missing bc I won’t hop on a post that’s obviously for their discussion & rants. Tho, when I do go snoop, I have never seen a Elriel theory or take that can’t be disproven BY THE BOOKS aka THE AUTHOR..

I get it

We’ve all waiting YEARS for SJM to finish a series & we want to see our characters HEA.

I have ✨ ZERO ✨ problem with yall shipping Elriel, it’s just the fact y’all still scream that “your book” is next.. Sweetheart, there’s no book… & it’s that y’all copy & paste Elucien/Gwynriel characteristics & dynamics onto your ship. Like, yall do realize the depth of irony you put yourselves in every.. single.. time?

Just enjoy your side of the fandom & understand that the ship YOU WANT can ONLY be achieved through fanfics or realize that your ship is actually just a pick’N’choose of Elucien & Gwynriel.

I’m sorry that I’m not sorry for considering y’all a joke at this point in the maasverse. Every Elriel take or “proof” I see ends with me laughing my ass off, bc it’s comedic gold the amount of hoops y’all need to jump through. Realistically, only thing Elucien’s & Gwynriel’s need to do is just sit back & wait. Because on this day of May 6th, 2024, we should know that something greater than the cauldron chooses mates, Elain & Lucien are STILL CONFIRMED TO BE MATES, Elain has yet to have an on page conversation with Lucien discussing the future of their bond, Azriel’s shadows still ONLY dance for Gwyn or Azriel, & Az’s chest still ONLY sparked for Gwyn…

ALAIS, Elucien’s have been trying to help manage y’all’s expectations since 2016 & now have us Gwynriel’s to back them up bc it’s allllll in the books babes! (We can pull evidence from all of her series that supports SJM’s theme of like calls to like, mating language, & mating behaviors to show actual proof of our ship)

Honestly, it doesn’t matter how much y’all try to “I know you are, but what am I?” us to death, it still won’t change the fact that after the CoN scene & chapter 60 in ACOSF, y’all should’ve just taken that L with grace & dignity..

I know the best thing to do is not engage or add to the flame & that they bait, I just can’t help it. I work in the legal field & arguing a point is in my blood! 💀 I get it, don’t yuck others yums, it’s just so funny that we are still neck deep in discourse with them about mates getting a book together… in a contracted fated mates series..

[mylesimeblr]

Aged Up: after everyone learned Spider saved Quaritch (who goes on to lead the ash tribes) and kick Spider out as a traitor, but Spider joins the ash tribe as Tsahik, and comes back years later to help the other tribes when they beg for the Ash clans help. Whom ever is paired in this ship, Mets the ash Na’vi that Varang wants to Spider to mate with.

I just love the idea of this with any of the pairs, Aocorro, Locorro or Nocorro.

Ok, I love this one and funny enough I was currently writing a Locorro/Aocorro story aged up future fic with Spider as a (very, very badass) Dragonborn/Mother of Dragons and FUNNY enough too they were actually based on red-skinned Na'vi (were you in my head?!) (I'm not kidding I'm 10 pages into this already!)

However, it was kind of dark (honestly, I based it on Game of Thrones so Spider is not having a good time at the beginning then he becomes basically a God leading all the Na'vi tribes against the human cities and Lo'ak and Aonung live alone to serve him)

But based on this ask, here's how it goes:

After Spider is kicked out, he struggles to survive alone in the wild and after weeks of surviving on his own, he's found by red-skinned Na'vi

At first, they're really not friendly and more or less happy stuff happen to Spider with the clan before they discover he has a gift and strange connection to Ewya when saving Varang from near death and Spider becomes one of their own, his strange humanity/power making him unique and very respected

Time skip - rumors start running of a powerful Tsahik rising in the south

When things start getting complicated with the Sky People, Jake and Tonowari have no choice but to ask for their help and the help of their powerful Tsahik

Varang accepts on the condition that their fiercest warrior mates with the tsahik

Everyone agrees even if Lo'ak is a little reluctant at being mated by "force" with some girl he doesn't know (or so he thinks) - he never bounded with Tsireya because he actually doesn't like girls but has yet to accept it

And then a few days later, the delegation of the Ash tribe arrives with the Tsahik and surprise, surprise!! It's actually Spider, older, super beautiful and Lo'ak is very, very confused because that's his bro and at the same time, it's not and damn, he's supposed to mate with his bro?!!!

Aonung finds his confusion funny and proposes to do the mating himself because he's really, really ok with this and Lo'ak glares at him

Spider has changed a lot, he's still much smaller, but he has an aura of power that keeps everyone frozen on their spot and he's very confident

Everyone is shocked, Neytiri doesn't know what to think, she's both lost between compulsory respect and disgust because a human cannot be a Tsahik, Jake is completely taken aback by Spider's apparition, Aonung is instantly smitten and Lo'ak realizes that he's actually been in love with Spider his entire life

This isn't exactly your prompt, but here's an extract of the story I was writing similar to your plot:

After Spider disappeared, all those years ago, he thought he’d never see him again. He thought him dead and he mourned him deeply. In silence. He wasn’t even aware of the true nature of his feelings for the boy back then. His brother. How this makes him laugh now! Spider was never a brother. But it took him years to realize it. 

He did hear the rumors and the formidable tales of a growing power in the south, far, far from their village. He heard the rumors of the Dragonborn and the mighty warrior who bounded with the Chief of the tribe and gave birth to the Dragons World. 

But like many, he thought this was a Na’vi woman and from the sanctity of his life with the Metkianya people, he paid it no heed.

Then, this mighty warrior, this mother of Dragons was said to be a human. He was intrigued but there was no interest piqued.

Anonung left to find this warrior, this human who he wanted to meet and challenge. 

And finally, the rumor made this human a man and Lo’ak’s interest was piqued. Not to mention that Aonung never returned from his encounter with this human he wanted to best and conquer.

When he finally realized that this God - arose Khaleesi - was his dear, long gone Spider. He was shocked at first - his mother was furious, she hated him and all humans after Neteyam’s death - but he knew he had to join him and see for himself who this Khaleesi really was - if it really was his Spider. He rode day and night on his Ikran to Merene where the Dragonborn was said to have built the beginning of a Kingdom. 

He had expected many things upon this first reunion, anticipated emotions and looks based on his now feeble memory of what the boy was like. But nothing could have prepared him for the absolute perfection that was the Dragonborn. And he pledged himself to him on the day of their reunion and for the days to come.

He wasn’t the only one who lived only to adore him. Aonung had long lost himself to a passion he could never quell. And Lo’ak remembered the rumors that did portray Khaleessi with a beauty that could not be resisted. He had seduced the dangerous Chief of the most primitive Na’vi tribe after all. And from their union, three dragons were born. A miraculous birth. A prophecy fulfilled. 

His feelings for Spider were already strong. But when he saw him in his glory on that Throne, he felt his soul sip from the pores of his skin and air leave his lungs. It was more than physical perfection. It was an aura of absolute Power. A beauty and a strength that transcended everything.

[olderthannetfic]

Hi, OTNF & Co (and YoungerThanNetFic)! So, I have a question.

When I started out doing gift exchanges and the like, I thought the idea was to not force your own vision on the prompter, and that in return you would be left a modicum of, you know, leeway in your own endeavour.

So yes, you'd follow the prompt(s) given, respect the DNWs and the wants if given, of course! But I've always felt that expecting someone to write exactly what you want was a doomed thing--the only person who could hit your buttons just so was yourself, and chance might make it happen sometimes when you find you read THE fic, but you can't expect a mystery person whose skills you don't know to just do it. That seems... unfair, compared to letting them play to their own strengths?

If I'm expected to follow a very detailed plot already outlined for me, then I know that I will have absolutely no desire and worse, no ability to do it. All I'm left with is "Why don't you write it yourself if you already know everything that's going to happen?" (If you couldn't tell, I'm definitely not someone who likes detailed scenario prompts, lol. Best way to get me to dry up instantly).

I thought the idea of gift exchanges would be to accept a little bit of surprise, at least--sure, I prompted, idk, "Space Pirates AU," but I wasn't expecting the vampire twist! I've also always considered fandom events to be for the entire fandom, not just the participants; I thought the goal was to make your giftee happy with a story they'd like, sure, but that you put in effort to make it good for them AND everyone else who might enjoy it.

But then, I've seen and heard different things; that one should follow a list of very detailed wants (the... letter? for Yuletide? I've never participated so I'm a bit ??? about Yuletide) and that somehow everyone was apparently expected to be able to write stuff they don't vibe with or even dislike, if the needle falls on you. I'm assuming a modly human touch is supposed to help with that, but now this is all making gift exchanges look quite scary instead of an exhilarating perspective.

--

It depends very much on the exchange and the people.

I personally love outline-level prompts as long as the person gets that I might write something else.

For Yuletide, I do generally consider it a present only for that one person because it's quite possible that nobody else cares about slashfic of Medieval Spanish books of proverbs or whatever.

Letters in Yuletide are optional to write and optional to read. The writer isn't obligated to follow any of your details other than DNWs that are listed in the actual signup, and they aren't even obligated to click the letter link.

Since they can already do whatever they want, I generally write fairly specific ideas and don't offer a lot of "You don't have to write my ship" waffle.

IMO, the key is that the more detailed your requests, the more variety you should give for each ship/fandom/whatever.

But really, most exchange participants are pretty low key. It's just the absolute die-hards who circulate massive lists of "rules" that appear nowhere official and make the whole thing more stressful.

[luminouslywriting]

Chapter 33 (Mastermind)—MOTA Fic

A/N: Just one chapter to go after this....I'm sorry it's late though! Life has been INSANE this past week and I just couldn't get to my phone or laptop between work and prepping to move! As always, enjoy though!

December 1945

Tangled up in one another’s limbs and cramped together in the tiny space of their cabin, Ruth didn’t altogether mind that this room was a tiny one.  She didn’t altogether mind that it had been months since the war had ended and they were just barely making their way back home.  It was just in time for Christmas and Ruth thought that the best gift that they could give to their families would be to actually come home—along with the rest of their gaggle that were scattered throughout the ship. 

Still, she knew that the quiet solitude that she and Robby had experienced for the past few months as newlyweds would end the minute that they ended up back in New York.  Their parents were simply going to kill them for eloping and getting married without telling anyone, she was certain of that. 

Her fingers drummed against Robby’s chest and she pulled herself up slightly.  She had fallen asleep on his chest late last night after several rounds of desperate quiet sex—quiet only for the fact that this ship had thin walls and they both knew that their neighbors would NOT appreciate the lewd noises or being kept up that late. 

Robby’s breaths were even and warm, a testament to the fact that he was still sleeping.  Ruth couldn’t help but be amazed at the sight of this wonderful man in front of her.  He was the best man that she knew and he was now her husband.  There would be no end to her being in awe of that simple fact.  Her hands roamed over the planes of his chest, going over the grooves and ridges that made Robby absolutely hers. 

All resolve crumbled as he shifted in his sleep, hands roaming over her waist.  She couldn’t help herself from leaning down and pressing a gentle kiss to his lips.  It only took him a moment to reciprocate the gesture—and considering how many mornings usually started like this, Robby wasn’t at all surprised. 

“Well how’s that for a good morning?” Robby mumbled, a grin spreading across his features.   

The grin that floated across her own features would have surely made her shake her head—acting like a damn schoolgirl around this man still?  Truth be told, Ruth wasn’t sure that would ever end.  

She ran a hand through his curls, massaging at his scalp.  “Well you were very peaceful while you were sleeping and I get bored easily, dear.” 

At that, Robby gave a laugh that made her entire being want to burn up—it was a chest-driven laugh that reverberated through her body as he shook.  “Why do I have a feeling that you’re always going to be bored now?” 

“Because we finished your part of the trial and we’ve been on this boat for nearly two weeks, which means I haven’t been able to really work.” 

“Ah the joys of doing projects with you again.” 

“As long as it’s not an art project.” 

“I apologized for that!” Robby exclaimed. 

She lightly smacked his shoulder.  “Only after I told you that’s why I hated you.  It had nothing to do with that dreadful kiss.” 

“I thought you liked my kisses.” 

“When they don’t break skin, darling.” 

“I haven’t done that recently.” 

“No, you haven’t,” Ruth agreed.  “I suppose I could let it go, but where’s the fun in that?” 

In one movement, Robby had flipped them over and left Ruth with a breathless laugh on her tongue.  “Pinned ya.” Robby got this great mischievous expression on her face that knew that if she didn’t put a stop to this, she would not be leaving this bed for several more hours.  

“No, no, no—we are not having sex mere hours before we get to our parents.  They’ll know!” She exclaimed, slipping from beneath his arms and rolling off the bed to finally dress herself for the morning. 

Robby rolled his eyes as he leaned on one arm, admiring the physique that he had lovingly adorned with love bites the night prior.  “We’re married, Ruthie.  I think they’re gonna know that we’ve, you know, had sex.” 

“That doesn’t mean we have to scandalize them!” 

“Isn’t that exactly what a marriage is for?” 

“No!” At that protest, she chucked a shirt at him and shook her head.  “Besides, we have to gather up everyone and ensure that everyone’s ready to go with all of their luggage.” 

“You’re such a mother.” 

“And you’re lacking in responsibility at the moment, Mr. Sharpe.” 

“That’s not how this works, Mrs. Rosenthal.” 

“I still think we should have just taken my last name,” Ruth said, slipping her socks on.  “Less hassle since I’m more established as a lawyer anyhow.” 

“Said the JAG-Corp lawyer to the Lieutenant Colonel.” 

Ruth finally came to a stop, coat covering her uniform.  She crossed the floor over to Robby and gently took his face in her hands.  “I’ll tell you what, Colonel.  We get through the whole family meeting and apartment shopping later, then you can have your wicked wicked way with me.” 

He gave a wolfish grin.  “I’m holding you to that.” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Being back in New York was perhaps the strangest feeling that Ruth had had in a long time.  When she had left these shores, what felt like a whole lifetime ago, she had felt out of place.  She hadn’t felt like she was needed back here at home.  She had wanted nothing more than to leave this place and not ever come back. 

But with both of her brothers at her side, with her husband, and with her other family members, Ruth felt nothing but relief seeing Lady Liberty for the first time in years.  There was no other way to describe this place but home. 

Tucked into Robby’s side, she grinned brightly at him.  “Do you think much has changed?” 

“No way,” Robby said, shaking his head.  “I’ll bet anything my parents are at your place and gossiping about the latest drama on the floor.” 

At that, there was a snort from next to Ruth.  Glancing beside her, Ruth found Abe practically bouncing back and forth on his feet.  “Ma’ usually knows everything that goes on with everyone.  Maybe she won’t even be surprised that we’re here.” 

John gave a flick to the back of Abe’s head.  “There’s no way she’ll know that either one of us is alive.  We’re more likely to kill her off from shock at this point.” 

“Don’t remind me.  I’m gonna be on house arrest until I’m 80,” Abe mumbled, shaking his head at John. 

“That sounds self-inflicted,” Ruth reassured Abe, ruffling his hair slightly.  “But don’t worry, I can get you a great lawyer.  Robby, wanna cement your place in the family by defending Abe against my mother’s wrath?” 

“I value my life far too much, thank you,” Robby declined pointedly. 

Ruth grinned and then glanced behind her at Liesel, Sveta, and David.  Given the fact that her uncle Yosef had been to New York before and looked pensive as he silently prayed, she chose to focus on her cousins.  “Well, what do you think?”

“It looks so big!” Liesel exclaimed, wide-eyed at all of the skyscrapers.  “I wanna see everything!” 

“I think we will,” Sveta said, slinging her arm around her younger sister.  

“I never thought I’d make it this far,” David admitted quietly.  “But I’m glad that we’re all here together.” 

“Oh just wait until you get some of mama’s cooking!” Abe exclaimed.  “She’s gonna fatten us all up and get Uncle Yosef that belly of his back!” 

Yosef blinked open an eye, giving Abe a piqued eyebrow.  “You prefer me fat?” 

“We prefer you here,” Ruth corrected warmly.  “Now…shall we discuss how to give my parents a heart attack?” 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Adaline Sharpe kept on looking out the window—at the snow that was beginning to fall from the sky.  Hanukkah had come and gone and though the New Year was rapidly approaching, Adaline had nothing to celebrate.  

Ruth?  Still in Europe and working on helping the Jewish people there.  Adaline couldn’t say that she wasn’t proud of her, because Ruth was doing something absolutely wonderful for their people.  It was something worthwhile and meaningful—but Adaline missed her daughter.  Jonah had returned from the Pacific but a month prior, but even his presence in the home just felt shallow. 

The simple fact of the matter was that they could all hear him crying at night and there was nothing that Adaline could do as a mother.  And it killed her. Alice was nearby with her children and her husband, and that was a small relief to Adaline.  But Alice had been at Sarah’s side when Sarah passed, and things had been quiet with Alice ever since.  

Sarah was a gaping wound and hole in the Sharpe Family that could not be filled.  Then there was the fact that John was killed in action—they had no body to bury, nothing but the flag that they had hung in their window to signify that he had ever been there.  Abe had disappeared years ago and Adaline’s heart ached every day for her youngest son and she prayed every day that she would somehow get news of his fate. 

There was Mary—and she scarcely spoke now either.  The house just felt lacking of life, lacking of the family.  Neither Adaline nor her husband spoke much.  What could they say to fill the silence, to fill the gap of life that was no longer there? 

At the moment, Anne Rosenthal was keeping Adaline’s thoughts from focusing on her missing children and the grief that she was now experiencing.  The two of them sewed quietly, radio chattering in the background to fill the other gaps of silence that existed for them.  And then all at once, everything changed. 

A knock at the door caught both of their attention.  Adaline’s face pinched together as she gazed at the door.  “I’m not expecting anyone.” 

Mary was quick to leave her books on the couch and get up on her feet.  “I’ll get it!” She crossed over to the door quickly and opened it.  It was her singular gasp that left Adaline and Anne startled the most. 

Because standing there in the doorway—was Mary’s older sister Ruth.  She was beaming brightly at Mary, standing next to none other than Robert Rosenthal.  “Well don’t tell me that you don’t recognize me anymore!  I haven't changed that much, Mary!” 

Tears welled up in Mary’s eyes and she flung her arms around Ruth as tightly as she could.  

“What’s going on—” Adaline started. 

“Mama!  Mama!  It’s Ruth!” 

Adaline practically fell from her chair trying to get to the door.  “Thomas!  Thomas!” She shouted through the house, trying to get her husband’s attention.  

Ruth had no sooner made it one step into the apartment that Adaline’s arms had been flung tightly around her and Ruth melted into her mother’s embrace.  Tears spilled out from Adaline’s eyes as she kissed every inch of Ruth’s face.  It took her a solid moment to realize that Robby was standing next to Ruth, a large grin on his face. 

“Anne!  Anne!  Your Robby is here!” 

“He is—” Anne was moving quickly now too. 

“Well I should hope that he is.  We got married,” Ruth grinned, taking his hand in hers. 

No sooner had the words escaped Ruth’s mouth that absolute and sheer chaos erupted in the house.  Because then Thomas Sharpe and David Rosenthal were making their way in to congratulate and see their children.  Then Jonah had risen from the depths of his blue days within the confines of his room—At the sight of his sister, his beloved older sister who he was the closest to—Jonah had practically fallen into her arms in relief.  

And once all of that was out of the way, Ruth kept a quiet smile on her face.  “I did bring home a few presents for you all.” 

“Oh nonsense!” Adaline said, shaking her head.  “You’re here now!  You didn’t need to bring us anything.  And besides,” she added.  “You got married to Robby!  Everything we could possibly want is here.” 

“I think you’ll find that these gifts are rather nonrefundable,” Ruth said.  “Isn’t that right, Robby?” 

“Very much so.  Let us surprise you,” Robby added warmly.  

Reluctantly, the family let Ruth and Robby step into the hallway.  And what happened next, no one was prepared for.  Because when Ruth and Robby returned empty-handed, everyone was confused.  But then the door to the apartment swung open and Adaline Sharpe nearly collapsed to the ground at the sight of the two people in the doorway.  

John and Abe stood there, matching grins on their faces.  For a moment, Adaline could not even speak a single word, unable to process if what she was seeing was real.  But then Mary and Jonah had moved forward at the same time, each clutching onto Abe and John—and Adaline’s sobs just continued. 

“How—how is this possible?” Adaline breathed out, eyes locking onto Ruth. 

“So—” Ruth grinned.  “John got downed in the Stalag.  And Abe flew with Robby until he ended up in a Stalag too.  So naturally, I went to get them myself.” 

The silence was deafening, sans Adaline’s sobs of relief at her two boys being alive.  Abe had sank into his mother’s embrace for the first time in years, the feeling of safety finally washing over him.  And when Ruth glanced over at her father, she thought she saw tears of his own glittering in his eyes.  He gave a short nod at Ruth—a surefire sign of gratitude and utter love and pride.  

“Oh Ruth, you—” Adaline started. 

“I’m afraid I’m not quite done,” Ruth admitted.  She leaned against the wall as the door opened again, this time revealing Liesel and Sveta. Adaline all but shrieked at the sight of her sister’s daughters—her dearest nieces standing there.  She rushed forward, taking both of them up in her arms and holding them to her.  

“Liesel found her way to London and Ruth took her in,” Robby explained.  “And Sveta—” 

“I was part of a liberation force when I went to the front lines,” Ruth said softly.  “I found Sveta in the women’s camp.” 

“And John found me in the Stalag,” David Aderman had appeared in the doorway with Yosef at his side. 

“And Ruth found me in the camp opposite of Sveta’s,” Yosef’s voice had filled the room.  

Thomas Sharpe rose to his feet and in two large steps had embraced his brother tightly, weeping at the sight of him.  

And as Ruth sank against the wall, Robby at her side—watching everyone in their family reunite and hug and be full of joy—she knew that it was all over.  The war for all of them was over.  They were home, they were together—they had found hope against all odds.  

“What are you thinking about right now?” Robby asked quietly. 

“That I’m grateful that we’re all here and together.  That I’m grateful for Abe’s meddling—I don’t think we’d be here if he didn’t meddle.” 

Robby grinned. “Probably not.  That kid is a mastermind, you know that?” 

“Oh believe me, I know.” 

[nekoannie-chan]

Moon

Title: Moon.

Fandom: Marvel, Captain America.

Ship: Steve Rogers X Agent of S.H.I.E.L.D!Reader.

Word count: 313 words.

Square: A2 “Steve actually is on the moon.”

Rating: Teen.

Summary: Steve is on a mission and you don’t believe it.

Major Tags: Doubts, relationship problems.

Additional tags: This my entry to @steverogersbingo Steve Rogers Bingo round 3. SB3090.

Links: Wattpad, Ao3, Spanish version.

@saiyanprincessswanie

My native language is Spanish so I wanna improve my writing skills in English if you notice any mistakes, please let me know and I will correct them.

I don’t give any kind of permission that my fics to be posted on other platforms or languages (I translate myself my work) or the use of my graphics (my dividers are included in this), I did them exclusively for my fics, please respect my work and don't steal it. There are some people here who make dividers that anyone can use, mine is not this type, please look for the other's people. The only exception is the ones I gifted 'cuz now belong to someone else. If you find any of my works on a different platform and are not one of my accounts, please let me know. Reblogs and comments are always welcome.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Marvel's characters (unfortunately), except for the original characters and the story.

Add yourself to my taglist here.

My other media where I publish:  Ao3, Wattpad, ffnet, TikTok, Instagram, Twitter. 

If you like it, please vote, comment, and give me feedback to improve my skills and reblog.

Tags: @sinceimetyou @unnuevosoltransformalarealidad @navybrat817 @angrythingstarlight @shield-agent78 @charmed-asylum @pandaxnienke @real-fbi @smokeandnailz @white-wolf1940 @tenaciousperfectionunknown @xoxonotme @bluemusickid @leyannrae @harrysthiccthighss @marvelatthisone @caplanbuckybarnes @sapphire-rogers @lizzieolseniskinda @notyourtypicalrose @hallecarey1 @nana1000night @talia-rumlow @writingshae @alexxavicry @azulatodoryuga @daemonslittlebitch @chaoticcollectivenightmare @endlesstwanted @chemtrails-club  @marigoldreamer @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @here4thefanfics @theestorm @patzammit @kmc1989 @somegirlfromasgard @rogersbarber

Steve quickly scribbled a note where he left you a little explanation: he had been sent on a last-minute mission, and evidently, you wouldn't find him when you got back.

You entered the flat; it was empty; you grimaced; it seemed strange; Steve was supposed to be waiting for you; they were supposed to go to a restaurant for dinner; you sent a message to Sam; maybe he knew where he was or maybe he needed his help.

“Yeah, right, Steve is on the moon," you mumbled as you read the reply to the message. You proceeded to dial Bucky; you were absolutely sure he was with him; you just hoped they hadn't gotten into trouble. “Hey, Buck, where's Steve?“ you questioned

“On a mission on the moon," Bucky replied.

“Sure, sure, just stay out of trouble, please, because Steve is already in trouble," you said before hanging up so he could talk again.

You turned back to the table, and that's when you noticed the note. You read it.

"Rogers, you are in serious trouble; your little prank has gone too far," you thought.

Steve quickly opened the door; he was back earlier than he had thought. He put the bow on the little gift he had brought you from his mission.

“Where were you? “you asked him when you saw him come in.

“On a mission on the moon, I left it for you in the note."

“Do you really want me to believe you?“ You kept quiet when you saw him stretch out his hand, offering you the gift. You looked curiously at the moonstone; it was beautiful. “You really were on the moon?

“Do you still want to go to dinner?“ Steve's voice trembled a little.

“To the usual restaurant?"

“Wherever you want," Steve took you by the hand; he wasn't afraid of anything but you in a rage.

[violettavonviolet]

Marvel Fic Rec's

All fics are finished and absolutely amazing! I've sorted these by ship and the word count goes up as you scroll. This is the first half of my Tony Stark fic recs, the second half is linked below.

Fics that haven't left my brain since I read them are marked with a star.

Gen

It Matters to Me

Shyane

Summary:

Tony doesn't like having an empty seat to his right.

3k, past character death

Inhale, Exhale *

Oceanbreeze7

Summary:

The Arc Reactor did so much more than what everyone had realized.

Or maybe they never thought to question how a metal cylinder could exist inside the sternum of a human being without causing any lasting damage.

Or

The story that questions a little more on how the Arc Reactor would actually affect the biology of a human being.

9k gen

Amateur Theatrics

galaxysoup

Summary:

In which Thor’s primary problem-solving method (a mighty blow from Mjolnir) fails to have the desired effect on a magical artifact, and his secondary method (a mightier blow from Mjolnir) proves to be actively disastrous.

26k teen

Frostiron

The Perfect Height

The_Winter_Writer

Summary:

Thor wasn't really sure why everyone in the kitchen was staring at Tony, half-asleep and tucked against Loki's side, until he realized that none of their teammates had actually seen Tony standing without shoes on.

1.7k not rated

Dollars to Donuts

thespacelizard

Summary:

University AU. Tony texts Loki offering money for Loki to be his personal takeout guy. It’s weird, but so is Tony, and Loki is strapped for cash. The arrangement becomes something more when Tony changes the script and asks him for something else – a favour. 

All human English University AU because that is all I know how to write. Ace!Tony, and Ace!Loki. AU fluff.

6k teen

Breathing Out Your Praise.

Michaelssw0rd

Summary:

There are seven Hebrew words for praise and worship. Even though Tony does not know the words, he worships his lover- the god of mischief- in the essence of each of them.

7.3k mature

The Golden Apple

orphan_account

Summary:

Prompt: "Offering someone mortal a golden apple, wasn’t just offering them immortality, it was synonymous with asking them to spend eternity together, which was basically a marriage proposal and a question to become a family in one go. Which yeah, someone should have told Tony that. Loki totally failed to mention it, thinking it was common knowledge. Tony just thought that it was a weird gift of art decoration. It was a fucking golden apple, it didn’t look like something to eat, he wasn’t all that informed or interested into myths, how was he supposed to know that having the apple sit prettily on his desk and not eating it just showed a painful and long indecision akin to rejection to everyone who knew what the offering of an golden apple actually meant?"

Tony had honestly thought everything was fine.

So why was Loki acting so strange after giving him that apple?

9k teen

Fighting, Flyting, Flaunting, Flirting *

Redring91

Summary:

-

“What’s flyting?”

“Tis a form of verbal battle performed in the courts of Asgard, where opponents trade insults in verse.” Thor explains.

“Offensive poetry?” Tony clarifies, because that sounds awesome.

Thor nods. “Loki was by far the best skilled at it – it was not for nothing he came to be known as Silvertongue. He ceased competing in official matches after a time though. He deemed there were none on Asgard who could claim to be a worthy match for his attentions.” Thor levels a thoughtful look towards Tony at this.

“So, you’re saying that Tony derailed the fight because Loki enjoys it when they’re insulting each other?” Clint says slowly.

Thor gives a rather helpless shrug. “Loki has always enjoyed flyting.”

9.3k mature

Accepted

Arkada

Summary:

Tony’s less of an Avenger and more of an Avenger for hire - and that means his services are available to anyone who can pay the price. So when Loki shows up and asks for a consultation, it’d just be bad practice to turn him down.

Loki doesn’t exactly pay by credit card. No, he’s offering something much more appealing...

21k explicit

A Supervillain’s Guide to Getting Married

LulaMadison

Summary:

Written for this prompt on Avengerkink: "Even though there's the frequent battles with the Avengers, and his plans are always being thwarted, Loki likes it on Earth. He doesn't want to leave! But Odin (and Thor) rather want him back in Asgard. Loki decides it would be a good idea to marry a local, and have an excuse for staying put. Maybe he tries meeting some new people, but they don't interest him much. Better to stick with the people he knows (and would never admit to maybe kind of respecting a tiny bit). So Loki decides to marry an Avenger."

41k mature

Tea with the Hatter (TGIF)

theorytale

Summary:

It's seven a.m., Thursday fourteenth November, 2013.

It always is.

61k mature

The Underwater Basket-Weaving Society of America *

thisiswhatthewatergaveme

Summary:

Loki's crash landed, which is great. Only what do you do with a powerless, power-hungry ex-god looking for retaliation?

130k explicit

tripping and falling over the red line of fate *

graveltotempo

Summary:

While trying to escape from an ambush in Afghanistan, Toni ends up on Asgard.

Things do not get easier from there.

Between prison stays, death sentences, and a secret that could kickstart another 1000 years war, she does find her soulmate. So maybe, it isn't all so bad.

131k gen

The Midgard Offensive

NamelesslyNightlock

Summary:

As Thanos begins to assemble the Infinity Stones, the universe cries out for its heroes. Tony and Loki have never quite claimed to be that, but they know that they’re still going to do a damn fine job of defending their planet regardless. There’s just no way they’re letting an angsty purple eggplant tear them apart and destroy everything they’ve built together. No way in hell.

143k  teen

pink raspberry cosmo

graveltotempo

Summary:

It's the last night of the Millennium.

Tony Stark's plan is to score a night with Maya Hansen, listen a bit to her research and have a fun little night.

But then he meets Loki, a handsome Prince from a faraway land, and the timeline is veered completely off course.

269k teen

Stony

Follow in Your Footsteps

Sineala

Summary:

When Tony is twelve, his soulmate's name appears on his wrist. Unfortunately, it's hard to find out anything at all about Steve Rogers.

It turns out there's a reason for that.

6k teen

The Winged Soul *

inukagome15

Summary:

It wasn't until he was three that he realized he was different and no one else could see the wings.

14k teen

To Have My Time Again...

WilmaKins

Summary:

It's been two years since Siberia, and Tony Stark is still dealing with the fallout - personal and political. Life is quite complicated enough, without Bruce falling through a wizards roof yelling that Thanos is coming. 

Thor and Loki are stalling, but time is running out. The fate of the universe is at stake. Steve Rogers is back in the picture. Really, the last thing Tony needs is for their plan to go horribly wrong and bring Howard Stark forward in time. 

But his Dad *is* standing in his office, whether he likes it or not. 

So, it looks like Tony will have to fix that mess too.

166k teen

marvel fic recs part 2

[blighted-lights]

choose violence; 1, 3, 6, 9, 13

(for this ask here!!! im still taking asks for this, so feel free to send more in!)

1: Character Everyone Gets Wrong

going to name several here, just because i can lol. for idw, its tailgate, drift, arcee, getaway, and tarn. for tfp, it's airachnid and knock out. jazz gets hit with this HARD no matter what continuity he's in and it's so frustrating seeing most fanon interpretations of him, because a lot of it is just rooted in racism. that isn't saying at all that people are intentionally being bigoted ofc, but a lot of the headcanons that people assign jazz and the frequent mischaracterization of him is... well. it's weird. it's weird.

3: Screenshot or Description of The Worst take You've Seen on Tumblr

so im not going to pull out direct screenshots on this, but there is a LOT of back and forth about sexuality headcanons in the tf community, and holy fuck does it get annoying sometimes. im full believer in the idea that anyone can headcanon any character as whatever they want, don't get me wrong, but there is such a lack of consideration for others and boundary crossing when it comes to people going "you're wrong, actually, and here's several paragraphs describing why". this character cant be bi for yadda yadda, they cant be trans bc yadda yadda, they cant be ace bc yadda yadda, or they can ONLY be ace bc of whatever reason. it's happened to me, to several of my mutuals, it's happened to other people i see just randomly in the transformers tag. there's been several vague posts made about people disagreeing with other people's takes and its just,,, it's draining, ngl. maybe not the worst takes i've seen overall but definitely one of the most frequent that annoy me

6: Which Ship Fans Are The Most Annoying?

obligatory "not all fans of these ship are annoying, this is me generalizing from what i've seen" warning here, but i think mega/op and mega/star take the cake. and dra/tchet. this is largely because there's such a big separation between the canon and fanon versions of these characters that seeing a lot of the fanart and fic made for them is just,,, agh. i can't really recognize these characters as who they're supposed to be because they've been so removed from how they're presented in canon media. and im NOT saying you have to strictly adhere to canon. because fuck canon, lol. but it comes to a point where these aren't even the same people anymore. and i wouldn't even care about the canon/fanon thing if some of these fans weren't so idk. mean? aggressive? when it comes to their shipping and people not agreeing with what they ship/how they present that ship? it's absolutely calmed down in recent years, though.

also there's a fair bit of dra/tchet fic and art that is just. absolutely riddled with casual classism, orientalism, and anti-sex work rhetoric, and its uncomfortable. so i tend not to engage much with the fandom on it.

9: Worst Part of Canon

this is such a vague question because i could say so much here, but i'm just going to go with the very biased answer of the frequent condescending way a lot of the beastformers are treated throughout idw. like. these are people. canon wants you to believe that these characters are just as sentient and alive as everyone else but just, jeez. look at what ravage does throughout all of mtmte. being pet, drinking out of bowls, sleeping under megatron's bed, the visual gag of megatron gifting him a bone in one of the cover pages for the holiday special in mtmte, nautica handing ravage a little energon treat, everyone calling him kitty. it's just. agh.

13. Worst Blorbofication

idw tailgate and ravage. absolutely tailgate and ravage, though drift fits here too. tailgate is an arrogant asshole who has a violent streak a mile long. ravage is a bitter, snarky jerk who was, at some point, considering on killing megatron. they're both complex adults and fanon does somewhat have a habit of waving these things away.

[distant-velleity]

Gift-Giving

Summary: Floyd gives Yu a gift. It does not go unnoticed. Word Count: 3.2k Warnings: none! :) A/N: Merry early Christmas, everyone... I present to you the longest fic I've written in the past few months and it's self-shipping nonsense. And it doesn't even take place around Christmas...💀💀 Welp. No beta, we die like men. Enjoy!

—

Like all things do, it starts with Floyd approaching Yu right before class.

—It’s a relatively quiet, warm morning that day as Yu heads to the alchemy lab, his freshly-washed lab coat folded and draped over one arm. He’s yet to run into any brawling students or scratched egos, or any disruptiveness in general. It’s a wonderful balm on his drained mind, and there have been no interruptions to this lovely morning yet.

Keyword: yet.

Yu is just thinking, Wow, this is really nice, when an all-too familiar voice sings out to him:

“Li’l Kooooiii~”

He looks back over his shoulder to see none other than Floyd approaching. The merman has forgone wearing his blazer entirely (both since it’s warm and because, right, doesn’t his class have Alchemy first today?) and is down to just his vest and shirt. For some reason, his arms are folded behind his back. 

Yu squints at him suspiciously. “…Good morning, Floyd.”

“Mornin’,” Floyd replies happily, shoulders wiggling a little as his hands fidget behind him. “It’s nice and warm out today~ must be nice for all the little fishies.”

“Uh-huh. What do you have behind your back?” 

Floyd blinks, as if he wasn’t actually expecting Yu to cut straight to the chase. “Eh? Well… Nothing… What’s up with you?” He shifts his weight from one leg to another.

“That’s… not what I…” Yu trails off. Something feels really off. “…okay, then.”

He wonders what it could be. Is it Floyd’s outfit? No, that sort of unorthodox fashion is pretty much par for the course. His posture and body language? Well, he does seem a little more nervous… but that’s probably not it. Is it?

“…Hey, Li’l Koi,” says Floyd all of a sudden, shifting his weight again. It looks a little like he’s chewing the inside of his cheek.

Yu tilts his head. “Yeah?”

“Close your eyes for a sec.”

“Uh…” There’s about two seconds in which he internally debates with himself before replying with an “okay” and closing his eyes.

With the world absent for a moment and his other senses heightened, Yu hears Floyd approach and his clothes rustle as he moves his arms. There’s a faint jingle—jewelry?—and then a little pinch through the neglected pierced hole in his ear. An… an earring, maybe?

“Done?” Yu asks when he feels like enough time has passed.

Floyd hums his affirmation with no small amount of satisfaction, so Yu takes that as a good sign and opens his eyes. The eel mer is beaming down at him, reaching out to hold Yu’s hair where he put on the presumed earring. 

“Cool. Now, let’s get to class; I can’t be late as the TA, you know…” Yu frowns half-heartedly. “And there’s no need to play with my hair.”

It’s tempting to pout and complain more about it, since he was going to feel for himself what the thing was, but he supposes it’s not that big of a deal. It’s probably hidden by his hair, so no one will question it, hopefully. And then he can go back to his dorm later and check for himself in the mirror.

“Okay~” Floyd cheerfully replies, sounding even more bubbly and ecstatic than usual. He then proceeds to mess with Yu’s hair all the way to the lab, much to the TA’s exasperation. 

—

People do, in fact, end up noticing.

—

1-B is the class that follows 2-D that day. 

During a pause when the students have to wait for their potions to settle in the vials, Yu stands by Jack and Epel’s station. Between the two of them, their potion-making seems to be going along well and their sample is starting to resemble the textbook example, so he sees no harm in idly chatting with them.

That is, until—

“By the way…” Jack looks down at Yu. “Where’d that earring come from?”

“What earring?” It takes Yu an embarrassingly long few seconds to remember, and he reaches up to feel it. “Oh. Oh! Well—Floyd gave it to me this morning. I’d honestly forgotten I was wearing it, it feels so normal…”

Epel squints to notice it. “Wow, Jack, you noticed that? I can barely see it past his hair—...wait a minute.”

Jack seems to share the same sentiment as Epel, whatever it is, because his ears twitch straight upwards and he holds up a hand. “Back up for a second. Floyd gave it to you?”

“The temperamental, violent Floyd?” Epel adds.

Yu frowns a little. “Uhh… I don’t know any other guys named Floyd. And he was being super nice today, if a bit nervous. Is there something wrong with that?”

“Everything,” the two reply in unison without missing a beat.

“Aren’t you two prejudiced? It’s just an earring,” Yu says, crossing his arms. “I still don’t know why he just gave it to me all of a sudden, but I don’t think he’s the type to scheme for the long run, so it’s probably not anything meant to kill me or something.”

Epel furrows his brows. “Well—yeah…”

“Still, that’s kind of unexpected,” Jack remarks, ears relaxing somewhat. “Keep your guard up, okay? Since you don’t know what he intended with it.” When the other two give him a look, he huffs. “I’m just saying that so you don’t end up roped into a deal of some kind! It’s not like I’m that worried about you.”

Yu smirks, knowing better, but Crewel stands up and calls out instructions for the class to continue before he can respond properly.

—

“Thank you for letting me borrow the lab,” Chrysos says politely to Crewel as he walks in, shrugging on his lab coat. 

Crewel huffs in approval, looking pleased at the freshman’s punctuality and neatness. “Good, hardworking boys should be rewarded for their performance in class. Just make sure to start cleaning up ten minutes before your free period ends. Now, I have business to attend to—I’ll leave you in here with Yu, he’ll lock up when you’re done.” With a billowing flourish of his coat, he steps out.

Yu finally looks over from the ingredient shelves then, spotting Chrysos and waving to him. “Yo. What are you making?”

“Nothing much.” Chrysos makes a beeline for the higher-level ingredients, only sparing Yu a passing glance on his way by. “Azul gave me a recipe I wanted… to try…” He trails off all of a sudden and whips his head back around to look at Yu.

“Is something wrong?” Yu asks, because he doesn’t think he’s committed any serious offenses against Octavinelle recently. He’s pretty sure, at least.

Chrysos doesn’t say anything, just steps closer to the TA and narrows his eyes. He then moves to get a look at him from the side, which is when his expression morphs into one vaguely resembling horror. “Wait. Don’t tell me…”

“What is it?”

But he goes ignored. 

“No wonder his earring was missing a scale,” Chrysos mumbles to himself, almost completely inaudible. His usually flat tone is full of disbelief. “I didn’t think he’d ever settle down like that, but—or he could just be playing around—”

Yu waves a hand in his face. “Uh, Twisted Wonderland to Chrysos?”

“Ah—” Chrysos blinks, caught off-guard for once with his eyes wide, but quickly schools his expression back to its normal stoicness. “Forgive me. It’s just… that earring is new, isn’t it?”

“Oh, this?” Yu asks, reaching up to feel the dangling earring in question. “Yeah. Floyd gave it to me this morning.”

That must have been the wrong thing to say, because somehow Chrysos goes even paler than he already is. “I… see.” He steps back and returns to looking for ingredients, although there is an unmistakably conflicted aura about him.

Chrysos pointedly avoids making eye contact with Yu for the rest of the period.

—

After grabbing his lunch, Yu finds his usual table and sits down, ready to just eat up and not think for a while. The cafeteria is loud, as per usual, so he almost doesn’t notice his friends until they place down their trays and slide ungracefully into the seats across from him.

Deuce nods to him. “Hey.”

“What’s up, Yu?” Ace asks with his usual grin. 

Yu daps him up from across the table out of habit. “Not much,” he replies, opting to not talk about the sore subject for Ace that is Chrysos. “How did your classes go today, you two? No fights?”

“No fights,” Deuce confirms proudly. “It’s been a good day so far.”

Ace raises an eyebrow at him. “For you? Yeah, right. Anyway—” Before an argument can start, he narrows his eyes at Yu to change the subject. “I saw it on the way here, but is that an earring you’re wearing? The locket is one thing, y’know, but I didn’t take you as a jewelry kind of person.”

“You’d be surprised,” says Yu dryly. “And you’re the third person to ask me about this today, excluding Crewel giving me the bombastic side-eye. Seriously—” 

He’s cut off by Deuce leaning diagonally over the table to get a look. The card soldier purses his lips. “Hey, doesn’t that look kind of familiar to you? The design, I mean.”

“Yeah… Yeah, you’re right,” Ace realizes, “Where’ve I seen that before…?”

The two squint and observe Yu for a few moments, creating a very awkward bubble of silence. Yu is tempted to reach over and clap in their faces. Instead, he just tries to say, “Guys—”

“It’s part of Floyd’s earring, isn’t it?” There’s a pause as Ace brings a hand to his chin. “Or Jade’s…”

“Stop fucking interrupting me,” Yu demands, reaching over and flicking Ace on the forehead. It elicits a disproportionately loud yelp. “Yeah, Floyd gave it to me. Now that I think about it, it does feel like a scale… Anyway, as I’ve said, you’re the third person to ask me about it today, and more than the third person I’ve had to explain it to, so calm down. Please.”

“He actually gave you something?” Deuce asks like he didn’t hear that last part to calm down, eyes wide. “Do you know why? Or if it’s, uh, cursed or anything?”

“He could also be trying to take advantage of you by making you owe him,” is Ace’s contribution. “If I were you, I wouldn’t wear it.”

Yu rolls his eyes. “You guys are just repeating what Jack and Epel said. I’m sure it’s fine, he was kind of nervous when he gave it to me, so I’m gonna assume it’s nothing actually harmful. If that makes sense. And, nothing has happened so far, so I’m gonna keep wearing it.”

“Yu…” Deuce looks at him with obvious concern in his eyes. “Are you really, actually sure? If you get into any trouble, you know you can call on us, right?”

“Yeah, what he said. Unless we have to actually fight Floyd…”

“Guys, seriously, it’s fine.” Seeing their faces, though, Yu hesitates. “...Fine, I’ll keep it in mind. But I’m still not taking this earring off just because you think it’s cursed or something.”

Ace snorts and starts digging into his food. “Worth a shot. I’m gonna get to say the most satisfying ‘I told you so’ of my life soon.”

Yu flicks him again. “In your dreams.”

—

The subtropical zone of the botanical garden is always unpleasantly humid. Yu rolls up his sleeves as he walks, looking around for the plants Crewel told him to collect for the next day’s classes. 

It’s through pure luck alone that he manages to stop himself right before stepping on an unmistakable tail, spotting it stretched out onto the pathway from the grass. He stares down at it for a moment, two moments, and then looks over to where a nearby tree covers the grass in comfortable shade. And, of course, a certain someone is lounging in that very shade.

“Leona,” he mutters under his breath, carefully stepping over the lion’s tail. “Aren’t you supposed to be in class right now?”

The grass rustles beneath Leona as he sits up, grumbling to himself. “How’s that any of your business?”

“Because you’re here instead, leaving your tail on the path. Again.”

“You didn’t step on it, right?” Leona yawns, not even bothering to cover it with his hand. “I don’t see the problem then.”

Yu raises an eyebrow at him, before deciding that this is hardly worth his time. He turns away, about to go back to the task he came here to finish—

“Hold it. One of the eels gave you that earring, didn’t they?”

For fuck’s sake.

“No, I beat them up and took it by force,” is Yu’s sarcastic response. At Leona’s unimpressed look, he rolls his eyes. “Of course Floyd gave it to me.”

“And you’re not making a big deal of it?” Leona asks, something akin to amusement starting to seep into his voice.

Yu shakes his head. “Everyone else is. Am I supposed to?” 

There’s a long pause in which Leona stares at him, grass-green eyes and slit feline pupils observing him from the shade. If looks could kill… Well, Yu wouldn’t be dead yet, but he doesn’t quite like the pressure that comes with being watched by this guy.

“You really don’t know, huh,” Leona comments finally, lips curling up into a smug smirk. 

“No…?” Yu narrows his eyes at him. “Whatever happened to ‘minding one’s own business’?”

“Guess I won’t tell ya what it means, then. I’ll let that moody eel do it himself.”

“Wait—”

Leona lies back down, rolls over onto his side so his back is to Yu, and falls right back asleep. As if out of spite, he snores exceptionally loudly, like an unspoken middle finger. 

—

After school, Yu is working on his homework in a corner of the lab—Crewel always insists that even someone in his position, a non-student at a secondary school, shouldn’t forget to study too—when the door opens. Azul and Jade peek in.

“Professor Crewel?” Azul calls out.

“Oh—” Yu sets down his pencil and stands up. “He’s not here right now, he’s getting something. Do you need something? Though, I thought neither of you have him until tomorrow…”

The two Octavinelle students turn to look at him. 

As per usual, Yu and Azul lock eyes—however, rather than glance away as he normally does, Azul stares at the TA oddly for a few moments. Jade is equally silent, a hand brought up to his chin.

Yu tilts his head a bit. “Uh, guys…?”

Jade is the first to shake out of his stupor, mouth curling in a smile. “My apologies. It’s just, your earring…” He chuckles into his gloved hand, not mocking or pitying but a secret third thing.

Oh, right. Yu had almost forgotten about it once classes were dismissed and people stopped bothering him about it. Only for it to be noticed yet again, he thinks with no small amount of irritation and embarrassment. And by the two closest to Floyd, at that.

“It’s about time you two got on my case about it. So many people have asked me about it today,” Yu grumbles, sitting back down and self-consciously rubbing the singular scale attachment between his thumb and index finger. “Floyd gave it to me and didn’t elaborate.”

Azul, finally tethered to reality again, coughs into a fist. “Yes, well—that… was to be expected, he probably doesn’t feel like explaining himself yet. Though he meant no harm with that gift, I assure you.”

“Yes. Absolutely none at all,” Jade echoes, his smirk somehow growing. A little part of Yu dies inside when he notices the eel is totally getting a kick out of this situation. “In fact, I would argue it’s the complete opposite. You see, under the sea, we often give gifts to those whom we like—”

“That’s enough from you.” One of Azul’s hands not-so-subtly reaches up for Jade’s shoulder to steer him away while the other rubs at his temple. “Seriously, you and Floyd are both far too giddy about this… Anyway, thank you for your time, Yu,” he says, so politely it seems a little awkward. “If the professor isn’t here, I may as well ask him our question tomorrow. See you later.”

The two leave as abruptly as they popped in, Jade still chuckling when he walks out the door.

Just leaving me alone to process that? is all Yu can think, still reeling. Rude.

—

If any Octavinelle students have questions or concerns about the way that Yu storms into the Mostro Lounge, they know better than to voice them. Instead, they simply clear a path for him and go about their evening, quietly turning a blind eye to the way he marches right up to Floyd.

It’s answers he wants, and answers he intends to get. 

“About those earrings,” Yu begins, “what did you—”

“Li’l Koi, you’re wearing your dorm uniform again!” Floyd cheers, shoving his serving trays onto some poor fool and lifting Yu up into the air by the waist. The TA, in a panic, has to grab onto Floyd’s shoulders to stabilize himself. “It looks really good with the gift I gave you, doesn’t it~?” 

“Y—” There’s a moment where Yu almost tips over and he tenses up in a panic, noticing how far away he is from the ground, but he relaxes with the feeble hope that he won’t be suddenly dropped. “Yeah, I guess… The sturgeon scale does pair nicely with the patterns on my clothes… Ah, but that’s not the point.”

Floyd beams. “Uh-huh? Should I fight another merman and get you some different scales, then? Oh, but teeth would be way cooler…!”

“Uhh, not right now,” Yu answers, trying and failing to ignore the way Floyd lights up even more at not being straight-up rejected. “I, um, wanted to ask you about why you gave me the earring. It was a part of yours, right? One of the scales from when you got into that fight.”

“Yeah.” Tellingly, Floyd averts his gaze for just a moment too long. “It was ‘cause I wanted to. I just wanted to give something to ya.” The way he lamely finishes it suggests it’s definitely not the whole reason, and Floyd himself knows it.

“Yeah, but…” 

Yu’s mouth feels dry; he knows what he wants to ask, sort of, but can’t bring himself to say it. Even though it’s just them around. Something he heard a while back pops into his mind—eels are cowards—and it sure shows with the way Floyd decided to go about this. If he even meant it like that. 

It somehow feels like he’s the bigger coward, though—

Floyd gives Yu’s sides a gentle squeeze. “Stop thinking about it so hard,” he complains lightheartedly. “I’m gonna shower you with gifts, and there’s nothing you can do to stop me.”

“Huh?” Heat floods Yu’s cheeks. “Wait, that won’t be necessary!”

“Too late! I’ve already made up my mind,” declares Floyd. “I wanna see you make more interesting faces like that, so be ready to accept a tooooon of gifts, ‘kay?”

“Oh—oh, okay,” Yu says quickly, as if speed will hide how flustered he is (it, in fact, does the exact opposite). Besides, receiving a lot of silly yet thoughtful gifts doesn’t exactly sound like a bad thing—

“Cool.” There’s an almost giddy energy to the way Floyd sets him down and then immediately takes his hand. Yu can actually feel him trembling a little from excitement. “I’ve got some stuff in my room I was saving up to give you, so let’s go.”

Yu blinks, and suddenly he’s being tugged along down the hall while trying to keep up with the pace of Floyd’s long legs. “Now? Wait, Floyd…!”

[thedrarrylibrarian]

Several people have been kind enough to let me publish their thoughts on fandom, community, and queerness to celebrate Pride in the Library. Today's piece is a conversation between @academicdisasterfic and his boyfriend, @saintgarbanzo. If you missed it, @saintgarbanzo organized a fundraiser to help support @academicdisasterfic with funds for top-surgery. This fundraiser has met its goal, and is referenced to throughout their conversation.

In this conversation, @saintgarbanzo is chickpea in bold, and @academicdisasterfic is rooney, in regular text.

chickpea: ok baby. let's talk about the gift economy in fandom. it’s something that's part of our politics but many of us struggle with feeling like our worth is tied to our production, even in fandom. has your fundraising experience changed your understanding of those concepts for you?

rooney: Short answer: yes.

Long answer: I think part of what drew me to fanfiction in the first place was a complete divide from capitalism. It’s such a relief in this world of productivity culture. I started writing purely because I loved it and I never thought anyone would read my fics. But then people did, and that meant everything to me. After this fundraiser, I truly understand why the gift economy is so imperative to fandom. People are doing me a favour by donating to my surgery, reading my fics, or writing fics that I love to read. It still feels overwhelming to have as much support as I did. I haven’t processed it at all, I can’t actually fathom it, and I initially had this dread about how I was never going to be able to repay the fandom for what it did for me - it’s not true for all trans men, but for me, this surgery will save my life. But fic saved me too, and I know the same applies to many. When I thought about it like that, I realised that I would do the same thing for anyone here, and it would make me happy to do it. I’d never think they had to pay off that debt. The difference between capitalism and the gift economy is that one is about power and competition, and the other is about the cyclical nature of community. Debts don’t exist, because we don’t give from a finite pool of resources. We give to each other from an endless pool of infinite possibilities.

chickpea: i had that same realization. initially the only way we felt comfortable asking for help was by offering an exchange, but then the exchange wasn't really necessary. everyone just offered up their resources–money but also their time and talent and attention. i go back and forth between feeling guilty/indebted and trying to remind myself that this is how communities are supposed to function and i can feel grateful without feeling guilty. 

you talked about fandom's resistance to capitalism being an initial draw. what about its queerness? my first fandom interactions were very much based in fandom being a safe place to explore queerness. i want to hear about the relationship between your gender realizations and this community.

rooney: You know, I didn’t even think about it in that way - it was more, “I need a queer space, I want it to be a creative space”. It was so apparent to me, even before I knew I was trans, that whatever community I invested in had to have queerness at its core. Back in 2010 when I was figuring out my sexuality, fandom and shipping on Tumblr became really important to me, so I already knew it was there and when I started to explore it, that’s when a lot of gender stuff happened.

I think so many trans people have a more nuanced relationship with their body than is portrayed as the mainstream trans narrative of just being born in the wrong body. I worked very hard before learning I was trans to love and respect my body, and I’d never call it wrong. But reading about queer men fall in love was truly a lightning bolt moment. I’d always felt like an outsider in sapphic spaces - I’m bi/pan/whatever so I do really love women and femmes, that was never the issue - but I realised that I wanted my partners to be perceiving me differently, that I wanted to be treated as a queer man. I think the transgression and fight against purity culture in fandom was so crucial to it - the feelings of displacement and disconnection aren’t articulated the same way in published literature. One of my first fandom friends was @softlystarstruck who writes amazing trans characters with a variety of bodies and sexualities and genders. That sort of representation, of bodies coming together in all those different ways, specifically in sex, made me feel like there was hope - that transness and pleasure aren’t incongruent but born of the same instinct. We have to desire the things that will bring us joy.

chickpea: i love you

rooney: i love you too baby

chickpea: i love that you talked about displacement within queer communities. we've all seen and experienced queerphobia and racism, the demands for productivity, toxicity, discourse that's both helpful and harmful etc. you're someone in fandom who i really admire for the way you acknowledge and navigate the problematic parts of fandom while still focusing on building community in a healthy and joyful way.

can you talk a little bit about being a trans man who consciously decides to stay in hp fandom?

i’ve definitely struggled with my participation here and your fundraiser has brought up those arguments for me again, because we've harnessed this really material and transformative help for you as a trans person, that was carried pretty much entirely by this community.

rooney: Ooft, the big question. 

First off I have to make it clear that I completely understand trans people who don’t want to engage with the HP fandom, because it’s a fucking hard moral and ethical quandary to navigate. But also, I don’t think anyone, including other trans people, should judge those of us who find the inherent transgression of fandom empowering and freeing. That’s my go to answer.

I understand the ethical problems of HP and its fandom. The series is just flagrantly racist. It’s heteronormative, homophobic, and all around “ethically mean spirited”, as Ursula Le Guin so eloquently put it. But it’s still something that I loved, and more importantly, the fandom is so strong not in spite of the series' flaws, but because of them. The more broken it is, the more there is to fix - and we’ve put in Desi Harry and Black Hermione, we’ve written whole essays on why Wolfstar is canon, we’ve taken terrible things like “house elves love to be enslaved” and written complex, thoughtful interpretations of the relationship between oppressor and oppressed. We’ve fucked with it all. Some hasn’t gone far enough, particularly in regards to the way we think about and portray people of colour. But overall, we’ve improved upon something without a single cent from that work going to J.K. Rowling. I find people in this fandom have had a much deeper understanding of the problems in the series for the longest, because we examine it so critically and closely.

No one’s perfect, but we’re all trying - at least, most of us are - and we’re doing things that make the lives of trans people and other marginalised people better. And I’m a trans person who can attest to that, and I know you are too. Universal maxims like “any engagement with HP is transphobic!” don’t even begin to understand what fandom is, what it does, and why it exists. (Those universal maxims also tend to be hugely influenced by Western morality and the legacy of Christianity)

And yes - my fundraiser, and how this community came together to support a trans person in need, really shows all of it in a tangible way. The people here are here to support and uplift those who need it.

chickpea; i often fall into the trap of feeling like if my resistance doesn't transform my oppressors then it doesn't count. i’ve written posts about racism in fandom and a lot of times i still approach it from the position of like, how do i make this palatable, if i just say it with the perfect tone then it will be more approachable and i'll like, convert the racists. i write it with the idea that i have to reach the unreachable. but over and over what i see is that those posts strengthen the people already on my side. and i think it's the same when we're talking about the effects on queer people of engaging with hp. like, a lot of times the argument is that our silly little stories don't translate into real resistance, because people think of "real" resistance as legislative changes and boycotts, as efforts that transform and educate or punish oppressors. and our trans fanfic isn't convincing any terfs that they're miserable pieces of shit. but it bolsters other trans people. it supports us as individuals in this community. i think that the emphasis on whether or not hp fandom engagement translates to "real world" resistance focuses too much on that idea of reaching the unreachable people. we're here and we're doing it for each other, and i *know* it's effective because every queer person i've met in this community has a story of being strengthened by a fic, or a post, or an illustration.

i want to bring it back to joyfulness  in fandom. how has it encouraged you to cultivate more joy for yourself and others?

rooney: Honestly, I think that idea about remembering who we’re actually doing this for is so important. And also I believe we can plant seeds for change through joy. Because here’s the thing - change doesn’t originate from someone signing a piece of paper enacting legislation. That’s an important part, but that person enacts legislation because they represent their communities. Communities who believe joy is possible are stronger, because they have something to fight for. Joy is essential to resistance. I want to reach my community with my words and make them strong. And perhaps then those sentiments will reach further, because we will feel supported by each other and capable in our own lives of challenging bigotry and violence, knowing we are not alone. I am convinced that is how change happens. 

But I don’t just want to be happy so I can fight better. I want to cultivate joy because I deserve it, because I’m a person. Transphobic rhetoric dehumanises trans people, and that disconnect from our humanity can be internalised; perhaps we don’t feel worthy of indulgence, frivolity, the whimsical and beautiful and luxurious parts of life. Fuck that. Every human deserves access to joy. Treating myself cruelly will not change anything about me - depriving myself of joy when I fuck up doesn’t make me fuck up less the next time, and it doesn’t help the people affected by said fuck up. But treating myself well, indulging my creativity and dreaming and desires, actually does change me. It makes me better to the people around me, and better to myself, which means I have more energy for others and myself, which means I give more - it’s the gift economy, it’s cyclical. 

So fandom just makes me happy because it does. I love watching these dumb boys in love. And rather than try and analyse that or judge it, I let myself accept it, and go with it, purely because it’s joyful and life affirming and connects me with the world in a new and beautiful way. It’s really just the power of storytelling, I think - it calls to something primal in us. Maybe it reminds us that we’re humans in this world that wants us to be more like machines.

Fandom makes me joyful because it reminds me of my humanity, I think. With every fic I read or gorgeous artwork it’s like I’m accessing this part of my humanness that I have to keep segmented and separate from my work life, my life where I have to so much of the time be productive and disciplined. Here, I feel all of my flaws acutely and deeply, and all of my wonders, and it’s soul deep. How wonderful to be a human and to feel so keenly - how preferable to a life of trying to stay in the boring, lonely middle.

chickpea: your soulful intellectual rigor is very attractive

rooney: i think that’s my favorite thing you’ve ever said to me.

chickpea: a lot of times i have to frame my self-care and creative work in terms of resistance because that's the only way i can allow myself to have it. but you are so fundamentally right. cultivating joy isn't only for the collective, it's for me. i need to think about pleasure and joy less as a fuck you to the people trying to crush me, and more as a gift. giving yourself that gift of joy really does give that gift to others, and that's such a beautiful, community building action. 

thank you for the reminder that being in community is about engaging with our humanity. it's a perfect conclusion to our whole discussion. humanity is gorgeous and gross and so is fandom and stories are reflections of that, and those reflections are so special to so many of us.

thank you for letting me trick you into processing your feelings. 

rooney: for the record i encourage all of your attempts to trick me into processing my feelings. 

Thank you both for joining me in the Library. I loved what you both had to say about fandom being a gift of joy to ourselves and community being a gift we give to each other. Thank you so much for the privilege of reading your conversation as a way to celebrate Pride in the Library.

If you want more @academicdisasterfic, be sure to check out his work on AO3! I particularly love his fic like the sun came out, because it so accurately portrays the way people who truly love each other treat each other - with gentleness and kindness and patience.

If you want more @saintgarbanzo, be sure to check out his work on AO3 as well! I love Sweeten to Taste because I'm always a sucker for a beautiful food description, and also because I love the thoughtful and nuanced discussions Harry and Draco have in this fic about justice and forgiveness and what we all deserve even when we've been wronged and when we have wronged others.

🏳️‍🌈 Lots of Love and Happy Pride! 🏳️‍🌈

[acacia-may]

Star In A Dark Sky (TDRR Crimsennui Fic)

When a haunted house fails to live up to Ennui and Crimson's expectations, it seems their date night might be ruined, but a game of ring toss might just save the day.

Crimsennui Slice of Life and (Fluffy?) Goths In Love.

Rated G. No warnings only fluff.

A/N: This fic was a gift for @randomsprinkles who has been insisting I post it for the world too, so I finally conceded put it up on AO3. I honestly wasn't planning on cross-posting to Tumblr, but this is for you @repo-net (I hope you enjoy it!)

Also highly recommend checking out the song "Star In A Dark Sky" by BATZZ in the Belfry (Spotify link; YouTube Link) which inspired this fic and provided its title. It's one of the most goth love songs of all time (in my opinion) and definitely makes me think of this pairing.

This story is meant to be read in their monotone, emotionless delivery and shouldn't be taken too seriously. That said, I hope I managed to give this amazing ship some well-deserved fluff.

Link to the fic on AO3 and full fic text below the cut. Thank you so much for reading! 🖤

“That was a let down.” Even though Ennui’s voice was monotone like usual, he saw the way Crimson was blinking at him and knew he was getting emotional. It was hard not to feel disappointed. That haunted house had gotten such good reviews, but it wasn’t scary at all. The blood wasn’t even realistic, and the supposed jump scares were pathetic. The actor playing the deranged chainsaw killer actually screamed when he turned to find Crimson, allegedly, sneaking up behind him, but she was really just standing there.

If Ennui was being honest, it was the best part. Watching Crimson terrify the haunted house employees made a feeling flutter in Ennui’s chest, and he didn’t hate it. Being with her made him feel like a new man—made him feel things, period. It was a strange but not unpleasant sensation. He just wished he could show her a better time than a pathetic, unscary haunted house.

“Sorry. I thought that would be scarier,” he said emotionlessly blinking at her, but when she just blinked back at him, he couldn’t tell if she was disappointed. She was so much less emotional than he was.

“It’s okay,” answered Crimson in her monotone voice. “It’s not your fault that they completely misused their budget and hired bad actors.”

Ennui supposed Crimson had a point. The problem was probably misappropriated funds, unscary actors, and bad writing. Still… “It was the only reason we came here. I would have never brought you to this carnival if I didn’t think we would get scared.” He paused—blinking at the bright, flashing carnival lights. “It’s too bright.”

Crimson nodded in agreement, but she said, “Walking past that petting zoo and watching you get mobbed by cute, fluffy animals was pretty terrifying.”

Ennui’s eyebrow twitched. The emotionless monotony of Crimson’s voice was so comforting. She knew just what to say.

“You would expect a carnival to be a little more creepy, but they really cleaned things up around here,” she continued, and Ennui nodded. He missed the days when the pier was dirty and dingy—filled with old, dilapidated buildings and shady carnies who smelled like cheap box wine and musty cigarettes.

“Things have really gone downhill around here thanks to the new management.”

Crimson nodded in agreement, and they quietly made their way to the exit. “We’re just not carnival people,” she said. “But I guess some of the games are okay.”

The colorful stalls of carnival games Crimson had just mentioned suddenly caught Ennui’s attention. Maybe he could make up for this dud of date by winning her a prize.

“Do you want to stop at one on our way to the exit?”

Crimson blinked. “Okay.”

Ennui and Crimson stopped at one of the carnival stalls for a game of ring toss. When Ennui won, he was so enthused his eyebrows twitched. From the blank stare Crimson was giving him, Ennui could tell she had definitely seen that gross display of emotions. It was embarrassing, but he couldn’t help it. Crimson brought out a very emotional side of him.   

After giving them many confused looks, the barker told Ennui he could pick a prize. Unfortunately, most carnival prizes consisted of brightly colored cotton candy and plushies of fluffy animals. Crimson wouldn’t like anything he got her here.

He let out a heavier breath than usual without even thinking to stop himself. He should have thought of that before.

Just as he was about to give up, he saw a ripped and crumbled plushie of a grey bunny hidden behind the others. It was missing an eye, was covered in dirt stains, and one of its arms was hanging on only by threads. It was perfect.

“I’ll take that one,” he said pointing to it. It took the barker several attempts and multiple directions of “Not that one. The one behind it” before he finally picked up the ripped bunny.

“Are you sure?” he asked in confusion. “This one fell off the truck.”

“Even better.” Ennui could feel the corners of his mouth twitch. It was gross, but he didn’t care. He handed the bunny to Crimson who blinked at it.

“It looks like its been through a woodchipper.” After a long pause, she looked up at him and added, “I love it.”

“I love you,” said Ennui. He paused. He hadn’t been meaning to say that even though he had been thinking it for quite some time.

Crimson merely blinked at him. Her blank expression was more unreadable than ever.

His eyebrows twitched again. Had he ruined their evening? “Sorry. I didn’t mean to make things mushy,” he said monotonously, but Crimson cut him off.  

“It’s okay.” She met his eyes—her deep, serious, and unemotional gaze sparkling like a star in a dark sky. Looking at her now, Ennui couldn’t help but think that even if sunlight was overrated maybe starlight wasn’t. And when she said, “I love you too” in that beautiful monotone way of hers something fluttered in his chest again.

Yes, Crimson made him feel things. But maybe that wasn’t such a bad thing after all.

[labellefleur-sauvage]

Tempests and Urges

Chapter III of my gift for @stickyelectrons! I'm so very sorry for the delay (it was a surprisingly busy winter for me!) but I hope you enjoy!

Read on AO3

Fic summary and current chapters here

XXX

III.

Lucien had never been to the Continent. Growing up, his tutors had dutifully lectured him about the intricate and long—and dreadfully boring—histories of the Faerie kingdoms across the sea, and how foreign their lands were from those in Prythian. Lucien remembered absolutely none of it. He was the youngest son of a High Lord, with no hope of ever needing to retain this information—why did he need to know of the economic policies of Rask, or whether Vallahan was experiencing a lower crop haul than average? No, he would be much better off learning all there was to know about the six other Courts that comprised his home land, to make allies and friends with the fae who might actually benefit him later on.

He mentally cursed himself for the hundredth time just that morning and tried to remember as much information from his studies of this strange Fae land as possible. Any information would be a boon at this point. All he and Elain has tried to do was enter the great walled city of Montesere’s capital early in the morning, and been immediately stopped by the city’s guards.

“Good morning,” Elain had murmured demurely to the faes holding swords longer than her torso.

The sharp clang of the guard’s metal armor straightening met their greeting. “What business do two Prythians have in Montesere?” a guard asked in a guttural accent. Her dark sharp eyes were narrowed with distrust, her frowning lips framed with deep grooves of disgust.

Elain stared wide eyed. “Apologies,” Lucien quickly replied. “We’re here to visit the sights of Montesere.”

“Yet you come from the east, from the mountains. Very little to look at over there.”

Damn this perceptive female. Lucien put on his most charming smile. “We went hiking in the mountains. We both love nature and walking, and wanted to experience the grandeur of Montesere’s famed peaks.”

The guard cast a disbelieving look over Elain, over her physique that suggested she’d never walked that much in her life. “And both of you went on a days long hiking trip?”

Alright, if niceties wouldn’t work… “Well, I suppose I got to view more than Montesere’s natural beauty, you understand,” Lucien said conspiratorially to the guard, lowering his voice and grinning slightly. Behind him, Elain gasped in outrage.

Miraculously, the guard chuckled. “Yes, a very lucky male you are.” She stepped aside. “Tide’s blessings. Enjoy the city.”

“How dare you!” Elain exclaimed as soon as they were far enough past the city’s walls. “Implying that we—that I—!”

“What would you have me do, Elain?” Lucien asked, annoyed. “From the moment you said ‘good morning’ and not ‘tide’s blessings’ or whatever they say here, they marked us as outsiders. There aren’t too many innocent visitors from Prythian at the moment, and I had to make us appear as non-threatening as possible. It wouldn’t surprise me if there’s someone following our every move even now.” He unclenched his jaw. They needed to keep a low profile, and they’d already spectacularly failed.

Elain looked around wildly, like she might spot some cloaked figure skulking menacingly in the shadows. “Surely they have enough visitors here that we wouldn’t raise any alarm.”

“Any normal visitors to Montesere would arrive by ship. We clearly aren’t merchants or farmers, so our method of entry was already a bit unusual.”

“Well,” Elain asked slowly, “what else do I need to know about Montesere?”

A great question. Lucien spent the next several hours wracking his brain to recall anything about the local customs of this far off fae kingdom. They made their way slowly around the bustling commercial districts in the city, generally making their way towards the docks. He remembered hearing from Eris, during some stuffy meeting in his youth, that Monteserens haggled and bartered for everything, which only came to mind when Elain had purchased a small pastry for breakfast and handed over the five coins without complaint. The baker’s eyes had bulged with disbelief, then he yelled something in a foreign language to someone at another stall, who openly laughed at him and Elain.

It was no use. Lucien decided that watching people would be easier than trying to recall something Armand, his oldest tutor, had tried teaching him over 300 years ago. Montesere, being surrounded by the sea on two sides, owed much of their livelihood and wealth to the ocean, and thus, paid respectable homage to their bountiful yet cruel god everywhere. Small bowls of seawater were placed inside the entrance of every building they ventured into, for people to dip their fingers in and continuously receive the sea’s blessings, he assumed, observing a gaggle of females perform the practice when he and Elain entered a tailor’s shop. Elain was about to begin wondering the store when Lucien surreptitiously guided her back to the bowl to perform the ritual. 

She adapted easily though, gracefully dabbing the salty water on her wrists then floated amongst the racks, selecting a modest wool cloak and haggling the price down ten silvers with a satisfied smile. There was no future for Elain as a spy—she was far too kind and free with her emotions for that line of work—but as an emissary, charming potential allies and adapting to new situations…Lucien could see a glimmer of potential.

“It’s been almost an entire hour since someone openly laughed at us or mocked us,” Elain remarked drolly as they exited the shop and took a random turn down another busy street, stuffing her new cloak in her bag. “A rousing success.”

Lucien gave a half grin. “At this rate, we’ll be proper Monteserens in no time.”

Elain looked around. “Besides booking passage on a ship, what else do we need to do?”

“Find accommodation for the night, but there should be enough guest houses around town that it shouldn’t be an issue.”

Her eyes gleamed and she sent him a sideways grin. “Since we most likely won’t be back to Montesere for some time after this, want to explore and see if we can avoid being the laughingstock of the city?”

If Lucien felt like a fish out of water—damn these seafaring Fae for making him think in puns—then at least Elain had grown a pair of gills and was flourishing. Ever since she told him off after entering the city, her eyes were wide and her mouth open in near permanent wonder and awe. Lucien couldn’t blame her. The city was built onto the hills and cliffs overlooking the impressive sea and docks, with the wealthiest inhabitants living so far up the hill as to be in the clouds. 

Most fae in Montesere were wealthy, and the city shoved its opulence in its visitor’s faces. The roads were paved with hand-painted bricks of various shades of blue, so that the streets themselves resembled flowing rivers and streams that led to intricate marble fountains in different central squares. One of these squares, adorned with an enchanted marble statue of a dolphin that moved and bobbed around its pedestal on its own, held a host of fine jewelry artisans. Elain watched one Lesser fae, her gray fingers nimble and quick as she worked the fragilest of materials—opals, obsidian, sea shells—into necklaces and dangling earrings. Elain’s fingers grazed a small pearl ring, longing clear on her face, before she turned around to watch the dancing dolphin. 

Lucien picked up the ring. It wasn’t the largest pearl ring, and even had a few imperfections: it was dull, and oddly shaped. Its price tag was more modest as a result, and he certainly had enough savings stashed away in Prythian to purchase it, should he wish to.

He set the ring down. No use thinking about buying an extravagant gift for a female who said she wanted nothing to do with him after their journey, as much as his inner beast begged him to throw away all the coin Rhys had given them away on a trinket that would likely be lost should he purchase it.

They continued exploring the city and what it had to offer. The architecture was unlike anything he’d ever seen in Prythian. Buildings of all shapes and sizes made out of a sand colored stone with red tiled roofs surrounded them as they walked the city’s narrow and windy blue streets, with perfectly manicured trees and hedges lining the boulevards. High Fae in fashionable and daring outfits strolled by. A few wore ensembles that wouldn’t be out of place in Summer or Dawn, but most wore so little clothing that even Helion would be shocked. Females in scraps of nets and gauze leisurely walked the streets with equally immodest and barely clothed partners, their hair in extravagant updos and paper-thin parasols resting on their shoulders.

“Stop staring!” Elain hissed as Lucien’s eye darted to and away from the swaying hips of a curvaceous High Fae woman covered in a blue chiffon dress that was nearly see-through and resembled the ocean’s waves, her heeled boots clacking against the brick.

“Like you weren’t ogling that shirtless male that just walked by.”

“I wasn’t ogling,” Elain retorted. “I was merely…observing the vastly different fashions of the Continent.”

Lucien shrugged, feigning nonchalance. “It’s alright to look. Although,” he lowered his voice and leaned into her, noting that she imperceptibly leaned towards him, “I think that blue dress would look so lovely on you.” Her mouth formed a little ‘O,’ and Lucien walked down the street with a smile on his face.

The smell of the sea was vibrant here, but especially so the nearer they got to the docks. Lucien had little sea experience, as Autumn only had a few rocky and briny shores along its eastern coast, and he had never been to a dockyard, much less the largest in a seafaring nation. The smell of salt and fish was strong, nearly overwhelming, but tempered with enough richness and freshness that prevented him from burying his head in the crook of his arm. 

Faes of all kind—High and Lesser—rushed around the crowded docks, shouting orders, carrying cargo, and preparing their huge ships for sail. It was hot and congested. Someone knocked into Lucien as they rushed by and a throng of workers swarmed around him. By the time he fought his way out of the crowd, Elain was nowhere to be seen.

“Shit.” Lucien looked around wildly. They’d only been in the city for half a day and he’d already lost the only fae he had to keep track of. He jogged along the docks, looking for that familiar head of brown hair. How had he lost her? 

There was no trace of Elain; even her scent had vanished under the fresh smells he’d just been admiring. His heart quickened furiously as he shoved anyone in his way. Lucien had not just lost his partner on this mission, but the female who could ruin him with a few words, his—

The beating in his chest was even stronger and louder now. Not with worry, he realized after a second, but with something deeper, something he’d only felt once before: the mating bond. His chest thrummed with recognition as Elain tugged on their bond, whether she realized it or not, drawing him to her. Desperate, Lucien followed the bond to its other half.

Lucien found Elain at the far end of the dock, partially obstructed behind stacks of crates, staring up at the largest male he had ever seen. Lucien wasn’t necessarily a small male, but there were plenty of males that were taller or wider than him; the Night Court’s general, for example, or even his oldest brother Eris. Both either taller or more muscular than himself, but Lucien hadn’t lied to Elain—he was a trained warrior, and knew a fae’s strength was more than just one’s muscles. He was lean but muscular, fast, and his fire magic was deadly.

Still, Lucien wouldn’t have said no to a few more inches or an additional twenty or thirty pounds on his frame, just for some extra assurances in this instant. The male towering over Elain was at least 7 feet tall, with more tattoos covering his pale, scarred skin than was on the three overgrown bats of the Night Court. One of his biceps was wider than both of Lucien’s put together, with a thick, barrel chest and thighs thicker than a tree trunks.

Despite the fierceness lining her face, Lucien could feel Elain’s fear through the bond. The male crowded further against Elain and leered down at her. “And what’s a pretty lady like you doing here, all by yourself on the docks?”

“Let me pass, please.”

“Oh, a foreigner.” Lucien could hear the sick delight in the male’s voice. “Has anyone showed you how we welcome visitors to our lovely city?” The male reached a hand out, and Lucien struggled to quietly sneak past the crates blocking him from Elain.

Elain sneered. “I didn’t come here to look at your ugly face.”

Lucien couldn’t help his small smile at Elain’s sass, even as his heart sank and he struggled to get to her. The male’s broad shoulder’s tightened. “You wench—”

She gave the male a condescending look from head to toe. “How does any ship you board manage to stay afloat? Do they just throw you overboard to serve as an anchor?”

“You fucking bitch, I’ll make you regret that.”

Summoning his fire magic in his hands, Lucien lept up behind the male and wrapped one burning hand around the male’s mouth and another around his throat, his legs firmly wrapped around his opponent’s midsection. He held on tight, tighter than he’d ever grasped anything before, his rage at someone threatening and insulting his mate fueling his desire to hurt and maim and kill. 

Lucien smelled burning flesh, the scent so acrid that not even the calming smells of the sea could mask the terrible odor emanating from the male’s body. The fae struggled against Lucien, tried to break the death grip that was threating to suffocate him, but found no amount of muscles and raw strength could compete with a male who needed to protect his mate.

“Apologize,” Lucien demanded, ripping the hand over the male’s mouth away. Lucien didn’t need to look at his hand to know that the warm liquid staining his fingers was blood.

“S-sorry!” the male gasped. Good enough. Lucien slapped his spread hand over the entirety of the male’s face again, his flames melting the male’s fresh and sinew away from his skull. The fae’s defeated groan was one of the most delightful things Lucien had ever heard.

The male’s body trembled underneath him. He needed to finish him before his legs gave out. Lucien leaned into the male’s head, so close his lips grazed the male’s pale, pointed ear. “Get the fuck away from my mate,” he growled, low enough that Elain couldn’t hear, then lept off the male and pushed his swaying body off the docks into the sea.

It took a few moments for Lucien to calm down enough to remember himself. The sounds of the busy dock gradually drifted to his ears as he took one calming breath after another. He couldn’t recall the last time he’d lost control and his inner beast took charge like that. A frisson of emotion split through his chest, and Lucien looked to Elain.

“Elain,” Lucien said softly, her fear making him sick. Her eyes were wide and glassy, her body stiff as she stood watching him. Fear, and another, barely perceptible smell, emanated from her slight forn. He held up his hands before remembering the blood staining his flesh. Reaching over the docks to swipe his hands into the sea, he held up his clean hands and slowly approached her. 

“Are you alright?”

Elain barked a short, high pitched laugh. “Am I alright? I just watched you melt the skin off a male’s face with your bare hands! Of course I’m not alright!” She glanced into the sea. “Did you kill him?”

“I don’t care,” Lucien answered truthfully without thinking, but grimaced when Elain flinched. “I’m sorry you had to see that, Elain, but what that male was saying to you…what he was going to do to you, I couldn’t stand by and do nothing.”

“But did you have to be so, so…violent? It was ghastly, barbaric—”

“It was Fae, Elain.” Lucien took another tentative step towards the female. “That violence is within each and every fae, always lurking just under our skin, looking for any excuse to break free and punish those who threaten those we care about.”

“You’re wrong,” Elain whispered, looking devastated. “I’m nothing like that, like you. I’m not Fae.”

Her horror roiled his stomach, but better for her to face the truth now. “That’s where I think you’re wrong, Elain.” Slowly, he reached a hand out, blood still under his fingernails, and entwined his large hand with her small, clean, perfect one. She tried to pull her hand from his but he held on. “Whether you accept it or not, you’re no longer human. You’re as much Fae as I am, and you have your own inner beast waiting to escape. Cauldron, were you even aware of the things you were saying to that male, how you were taunting him?” He studied her hand and the long, slightly pointed nails on each finger. If she so desired it, she could easily rip someone’s throat out now. “Would you have said those things as a human? You’re fae now and your beast is raring for a fight. "

Elain was quiet, her lower lip trembling. “I don’t want to destroy the world or be violent.”

“Then let me be your protector, Elain.” He moved their twined hands together and lowered his voice. “A higher being connected us for some reason—take advantage of it to do want you want within reason, find yourself, with the knowledge that your mate will be nearby to keep you safe.” He darted a quick look up to Elain’s face at her small intake of breath. “Which is, I suspect, at least part of the reason why you insisted on joining me, correct?”

She hung her head. “I don’t want to give you any false promises about…us.”

Lucien’s chest ached but he gave Elain an unaffected grin. “Of course not, my lady. We’re associates journey towards a common goal, right?” He frowned. “Even if you had ulterior motives for joining me.”

Elain withdrew her hand from his grasp, her gaze cold. “You cannot fault me for trying to find my place in the world I was unfairly thrust into.”

“Fault you? Of course not. Do I perhaps think you foolish for attempting to do so during a critical and dangerous mission?” Lucien shrugged, rather than state the obvious.

Elain stepped away on wobbly legs. “We’ve already established you’re not a gentleman, so say what’s on your mind!” she snapped, all fear of him forgotten.

Lucien was glad—he’d rather see Elain furious with him than afraid of him, or afraid of herself. “Fine. While I commend your courage and need to find yourself in this new world, I think you may be in a bit over your head and are too stubborn to admit it. No, I know you’re too stubborn to admit it.”

She paused. “You don’t think me too weak to accompany you?”

“There are many things I find you, Elain Archeron, but weak is not one of them.”

They stared at each other, unmoving, for several seconds. “Everyone else always thought me too quiet and reserved. Nesta and Feyre are bold; I’m supposed to be the quiet one.” Elain cocked her head. “It’s nice, not having that expectation.”

Lucien could relate all too well to other’s idealized expectations and the pressures it created. “Well, one benefit of being fae: you’re strong enough now that you probably could have punched that male and sent him flying off the docks, so I don’t believe you have to worry about being weak.”

“I didn’t mean weak in that way.”

“I know. I don’t think you’re weak in any sense of the word.”

Elain bit her bottom lip, but Lucien could see the corners of her mouth raise slightly all the same. “You overestimate my ability to fight. I’ve never hit someone in my life.”

“That’s alright; we still need to find a ship for passage. Perhaps you’ll find some other poor soul to antagonize and I can teach you.” Lucien lightly grabbed Elain’s wrist and pulled her out of the cover of the crates. He looked around; no one was staring at them, so it appeared nobody saw—or cared—about their altercation. Lucien dropped her hand as they began walking down the docks, but Elain stayed next to him. 

“Let’s find us a ship that can take us where we need to go. The sooner it leaves, the better.”

“Any requirements?” Elain asked, her eyes wide again at the unfamiliar sights surrounding them.

“Large enough that it won’t topple over, and preferably without any holes in its hull. Truthfully, I know very little about ships.”

Elain hummed. “My father was a merchant, and worked with several different ships and crews to transport his goods to and from the Continent. That ship, for example,” pointing to a large boat to their right, “probably wouldn’t be comfortable for us.”

“Why is that?” Lucien had been eyeing that ship as an option for them, and could see no obvious issues. Its sails were intact, the hull complete, and though a bit plain, it looked clean enough.

“Look at its gangway, see how it’s all dirty and covered in…filth? That means they’re probably transporting a large number of animals, so it will be messy and smelly and loud. If there’s nothing else it will work, but…” Elain shrugged. “We could probably do better.”

“I see,” Lucien said slowly, watching as several large oxes were indeed shoved up the creaky gangway onto the boat. “Well spotted. What about that one?”

Elain looked at a ship further down the dock Lucien pointed out. It was larger than the first, its sails bright white and hull shiny. Someone had even painted the wood in bright, colorful paints.

“Definitely not. That ship has never sailed before. It’s bad luck to journey on a ship’s maiden voyage.”

Lucien hummed. Must be a human superstition. They continued leisurely strolling down the dock. “In that case, what do you recommend?”

Elain scanned the dozens of ships around them as they continued to walk, her eyes sharp and quick. Eventually her gazed focused on one ship. “That one.”

“That one?” Lucien’s eyebrows raised in surprise. It was a plain and unremarkable ship, not the largest or smallest, with no finery or distinguishing features. “What makes it suitable for us?”

Elain nodded her head to a gruff looking male studiously inspecting several crates loaded with spices. “Because the ship’s cook has ordered a large number of different spices for food. If the captain cares that much about keeping their passengers happy, they must run a decent ship. Plus, look at that trunk.” They watched as a large, painted chest was brought onto the ship. It was decorated with gold accents and had small, brass feet on the bottom corners, to protect the chest’s painted bottom. “That’s the personal chest of a very wealthy fae. Those with money don’t trust just anyone to transfer themselves or their goods long distances. We want this ship,” Elain finished, looking pleased with herself.

“How do you know that’s the ship’s cook?”

“The grease stained apron and burn scars on his arms look convincing.”

Lucien hummed. “If you’re sure…”

But Elain was already off, moving towards the male wearing his dirty apron. “Tide’s blessings! We’d like to inquire about booking passage on this fine ship.”

“Main deck, talk to the female in the blue jacket,” the male said without looking at either Elain or Lucien. He gave a grunt of dismay when he opened a black tin overflowing with a red powder. “And where is my Raskian paprika, Szechka? I know authentic Raskian paprika straight from the fields when I see it, and this shit isn’t it.”

Leaving the angry cook and his stuttering supplier, the pair walked up the sturdy gangway to the ship’s main deck. It was controlled pandemonium, much like the state of the dock: faes hurriedly carrying supplies and parcels onto the boat, performing last minute cleanings and mending. Lucien looked up to see a small winged fae hovering in midair while carefully patching a hole in the main sail. 

It took them several moments to find the female. Shorter than even Elain and even slighter, the Lesser Fae had light gray skin and black hair. She stood near the helm, watching the movement of every being on the ship with a keen eye. A cracked, brown leather notebook was in her slightly scaly hands, and she occasionally jotted something down in the book.

“Tide’s blessings,” Lucien said, approaching the woman. She looked up at them with wholly black, narrowed eyes. “We were told to speak with you concerning booking passage for ourselves on this ship.”

“Aye, I’m the one you’d wish to speak with.” The woman’s voice was soft and wispy, each word floating away on the sea breeze as soon as it left her thin lips. “We’re set to leave tomorrow morning, making our way down the coast to a neutral village in the mortal lands then back north, along the eastern and northern coasts of Prythian to arrive in Hybern 43 days after settling out.”

Lucien kept his face blank, though the ship being bound for Hybern unsettled him. Rhys was right, that the Continental Fae were indeed more comfortable with Hybern than previously thought. “Are you planning on stopping at the Slevibor Islands while making your way down the coast to the mortal lands?”

The Slevibor Islands were several small, nearly uninhabited islands along the western coast of the Continent, due west from Koschei’s Lake. The islands were near the start of the river that he and Elain would take to get to the death god’s lake. Only one small port town, rumored to be filled with dangerous pirates, occupied the islands, though perhaps the rumors held some truth to them, based on the way the Lesser fae’s eyes widened. “We weren’t planning on stopping at Slevibor, no. Very few reputable ships do.”

“And is there any way we could convince the captain to make a special trip?” Lucien asked, subtly flashing his full coin purse at the female. 

The fae pursed her lips. “Interesting that two faes from Prythian need to visit the Slevibor Islands so badly that they’re willing to pay extra for the trip.”

“Nothing that interesting, just doing a bit of travel.”

The female gave a noncommital ‘humph’ and opened her aged notebook and a quill. “Spring Court, I’m assuming?” she asked, not looking at either of them. “You, especially,” she pointed at Elain, “have the look of Spring about you.”

Elain blushed, but Lucien had to admit the fae was correct: Elain looked as fresh and innocent as many of the Spring Court nobility, especially with her wide, brown eyes and lovely hair. “Er, that’s right,” Lucien said eventually when he realized both Elain and the fae female were looking at him expectantly. “We’re from Spring. How could you tell?”

“My mother was originally from Spring.” The female continued taking notes down in her book, the quill resting against the webbing between her fingers. “She fled shortly after the old High Lord was murdered and the new one ascended. She could see the writing on the wall about the new High Lord, knew nothing good was to come from him. From what I hear from the waters, she was correct, and my sisters who remain are not prospering like they once did.”

Lucien started. Of course the female was at least part water-wraith. He knew little about the treatment of Lesser fae in the Continent, but if it was anything like Prythian, the fact that this female appeared to have a high ranking position on the ship meant she had beaten many prejudices to get this far. Unease at hearing someone talk so crudely yet accurately about Tamlin—at one time, his dearest and only friend in the world—settled low in his gut.

“My father was a merchant,” the female went on conversationally, seeing the earlier surprise in Lucien’s face. “I was born on his ship—this ship, in fact—and inherited it when he retired. Decades now.” She tapped on her notebook with her quill and looked up at them from the corners of her eyes. “How much coin do you have?”

Lucien told her, and though the female tried to remain stoic, he could smell her excitement at the sum. “We won’t stop at Slevibor, but I can have some crewmembers row you two to the Islands, provided you both pack light. No trunks. Meals are included while you’re on the boat. Depending on our timing, we may even be able to send you off with some provisions, but no promises. We’re tight on space, but I’ll find room for two extra hammocks. Any questions?”

Elain and Lucien had none, and the woman smiled, her mouth full of pointed teeth. “Then let me welcome you to the Eueteria. My name is Thetis, and I’ll be your captain. What are your names?”

Lucien and Elain provided fake names to Captain Thetis. “Oran and Phoebe,” she said, adding their names to an already long list of others. “Reason for travel?”

“Uh,” Lucien began. He didn’t think anyone would particularly care why he and Elain were joining the ship, as long as they paid, so he didn’t have a specific backstory planned. “We’re… um…”

“On our honeymoon!” Elain gave Captain Thetis a wide, eager smile at the same time she forcefully grabbed Lucien’s arm. “Newly married. Oran here,” Elain said, squeezing Lucien’s arm for dear life, “knows it’s my life’s dream to visit every inch of the Continent and like a good…husband…he’s giving me the best wedding present I could have dreamed of!” 

Lucien was positive that their new captain did not believe them. “Alright,” Thetis said slowly, looking between Lucien and Elain’s flushed and awkwardly smiling faces. “I’ll put ‘pleasure’ as your reason for travel.”

Lucien was sure his face was as red as his hair for several minutes after they provided a deposit and were given instructions for the next morning. They left the docks, each refusing to look at each other, and made their way back into town, all while Lucien wondered: why?

Why had Elain said they were newly married? She had made it clear to him that she wasn’t interested in him in that way, even if her body sometimes thought otherwise. Perhaps she simply panicked—loath as he was to admit it, the cover story of two besotted, hapless fae on their honeymoon was a decent explanation for why there were traveling alone together. 

It probably didn’t even matter, Lucien thought as they stopped at a colorful flower market. Based on the long list of people already traveling on the boat, he and Elain would be lucky to each have their own hammock in the large shared sleeping quarter. Nothing would happen. They would be on the ship for just a few days, get to the Slevibor Islands, then make the arduous journey along the river that would take them directly to Koschei’s Lake.

Directly to the most dangerous being perhaps in the world. 

[scramble-crossing]

2 3 10 12 13 for the ask game!

2. A headcanon you weren't sure about at first but have come to like! Ok this is hard to answer because I forget what's canon and what's intricately-woven-into-my-brain headcanon but I'll say the "Kariya was an Angel" theory! I never disliked it, but I never liked it more than the simpler explanation of "Oh he's just been around the block a couple of times, that's why he knows more than the average Reaper but still couldn't pick out Joshua as the Composer-that stuff's above his paygrade." Even now it's not "canon to me" level of headcanon, but I can see the appeal and really I appreciate anything that inspires people to look a littler closer at characters like Kariya or Uzuki. Also it's really good when played for comedy. His ass is showing up at the Angel convention, stealing as many appetizers as he can, and bouncing before anyone can point out that he got fired 30 years ago for skipping meetings to go play Tin Pin with random Wall Reapers.

3. A character that fandom has helped you appreciate It's too easy to say Coco so Beat! It's embarrassing to admit but I kinda had a bone to pick with him when I was first getting into the series for sorta "replacing Sho" in neo. I didn't think he was as interesting (and to be fair he really isn't in neo until you take his relation to Rindo's arc into consideration; he works wonderfully as a back for Rindo to hide behind even if his own story was very much concluded by the end of the first game. Then there's also his dynamic with Neku, which is very very good, but he didn't need to be a player character for that. Anyways). Beat analysis posting made me actually pay attention to him while replaying the games and realize how much I'd missed skimming over him in W2 (the poor guy's really gotta try to compete with fan darling Joshua and Sho, aka the loudest fucking man alive, for screen time). His stint as a Reaper is incredibly fascinating. I forget who, but I always distinctly remember someone talking about Beat getting prepped to try and deaden his heart and become as brutal and merciless as a Reaper is supposed to be before ultimately choosing kindness in both his siding with Neku and sparing Kariya and Uzuki in W3 and man.....yeah. He's just such a good guy. He's easily in the top 10 favs now, if not the top 5

10. A blog (mutual or one you follow) that has made your fandom experience brighter Well....yknow....

There are a LOT of others and I'm too shy to tag but goldensunset (incredible analysis) playtwewy (fav fics ever) sho-minamimoto (awesome art + sho headcanons) dj-of-the-coven (made me love beat) purplelea (also incredible analysis) bitternami (very kind and wow I read a fic of yours once and it blew me away...I will remember to find it and leave a comment soon) leonvilasi (always leaves fun and interesting comments in my notes) off the top of my head and a whole bunch of people who aren't as active in the twewy fandom anymore or whose art I love and the people I always see leaving funny tags in my notes you're all awesome <3

12. Compliment someone else in your fandom AUGH HELL ON EARTH!!! dandelion2302 I absolutely adore the way you draw Sho your art is amazing.................

13. Your favorite type of fandom event (gift exchange, ship week, secret santa, prompt meme, etc) Yknow I've never actually done any fandom events before twewy! I had a blast during the twewybang and while I probably won't participate again for a while (I'd rather finish the fic I wrote for the 23 one first) it was a wonderful first experience with this sort of thing :]

[melisusthewee]

Fanfic Writer Questions

I was tagged in this by both @dreadfutures and @blarrghe ! I did this once a few years ago, so it's interesting to see what's changed since then.

Tagging forward: @theluckywizard @greypetrel @darethshirl @natliecole @if-not-now-tell-me-when @madame-fear

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 35, though I believe 5 of them are artwork only for exchanges and not actually fics.

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 87, 413 words

3. What fandoms do you write for? In my AO3 era: Hockey RPF; Dragon Age; La Sociedad de la Nieve/Society of the Snow Pre-AO3 (the ff.net/LJ era): Digimon Adventure, Harry Potter, The Lord of the Rings, Doctor Who, Beatles RPF, a little bit of DC/Marvel

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? 1. The Tang of Liquor On His Tongue (Dragon Age) 2. The Dreamer Sets the Rules (Dragon Age) 3. mala suledin nadas (Dragon Age) 4. Smut Challenge 2: War Table Boogaloo (Dragon Age) 5. Mañana (LSDLN/SotS)

5. Do you respond to comments? Yes! Or at least I try to! There have been a couple of times where I've gotten overwhelmed or have been busy and fallen behind. But I try really hard to reply to every single comment I get.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? That's hard to pick. I think that a lot of my fic endings lean more towards catharsis than raw angst. Perhaps "Lathbora Viran" is the angstiest ending because it concludes a trilogy of fics about Solas' spirit friend Wisdom and ends with the implication that Wisdom became corrupted into the Regret demon that appears in Skyhold in "Tevinter Nights".

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Any of my romantic fics, I guess? If I had to pick one then I would probably say "Nothing Else Than What is Now" which was the extremely long one shot that led to all my Quinn Trevelyan/Horatio Morris nonsense. It originally wasn't supposed to have a happy ending, but about midway through writing it I changed my mind and even though OC / OC is extremely niche in just about any fandom, I'm still glad I did it.

8. Do you get hate on fics? Not yet. We'll see if that changes now that I've mentioned I've written LSDLN fic.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Yep. 2 out of my top 5 fics are smut, and 2 more out of the top 5 have implied sex. I suppose that says I must be good at it. I don't really know what kind of smut I write since every smutfic I've written has been either a challenge or a prompt fill or a gift. I think I'm an example of that meme of "the 2000 word blow job is an important piece of character development". I really lean into tricking you into having emotions and feelings and getting introspective inside characters' heads while they're naked and getting down dirty. Come for the smut, stay for the emotional feelings!

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? I did when I was younger, but haven't really vibed with it much in recent years. In terms of published fic, maybe the Harry Potter/Beatles crossover drabble I wrote based on a piece of artwork that an old friend of mine had done. I still have the fic, but the artwork has sadly been lost to the ethers of the internet. But the idea was that the Beatles didn't really break up in 1970, they just took on a different career.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not to my knowledge.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Not to my knowledge. But I have taken to granting permission in my author's notes of new fics for anyone who might want to translate them into other languages.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yes, actually! Some of my very first fanfics were co-written with a friend of mine. We never published them, but it was just fun to write little stories together.

14. What's your all time favourite ship? Even though I've never written any fanfic for it, I am 100% pure unleaded Chrobin trash. They are my OTP and I am probably due for a replay of Fire Emblem Awakening for it again. "YOU ARE THE WIND AT MY BACK AND THE SWORD AT MY SIDE."

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? One of the very first fics I ever started writing for the Dragon Age fandom was an Alistair/Cousland piece that looked at the period of time between the Warden's disappearance and their (hopefully) eventual return. It was meant to be 10 chapters, with each chapter split between a section in the past that looked at their romance over time and a section that took place in the more immediate present as Alistair navigated the events of DAI. I still have the document sitting on my laptop as well as backed up in my google drive, but I only ever finished the first chapter and even though I go back to it sometimes and make notes, I've not worked on it with any serious attention in years (I started this fic not too long after the Trespasser DLC was released) and at this point I doubt it will ever be in a publishable state let alone finished.

16. What are your writing strengths? I think I'm really good at dialogue! I'm very good at conveying personalities and speech patterns in written dialogue.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Blowjobs

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? For me, I think it depends on the amount of dialogue that is being spoken in another language and whether or not it's something the character whose POV is being written would understand.

With fantasy settings like Dragon Age, most of my fics are written from the POV of one of the game protagonists which are all human in my world state. So they wouldn't understand things like Qunlat or Elvhen, but also as those conlangs are incomplete languages, I will usually just refer to dialogue as being spoken in a language that the POV character doesn't understand. In a few fics where I've written from Solas' POV, I have used things like italics or sometimes <<special dialogue brackets>> to denote that this speech is being spoken between two characters in another language. Since the languages are fictional but the story is being told in English, it makes sense that the "author" translates in a similar logic to how Tolkien's books are "translated" for us to read.

With stories and settings that are more grounded in reality, I'll use other languages where appropriate. Usually this is in the form of nicknames or titles or expressions that I feel can't really convey the same tone or idea if they were translated into English. I've been very fortunate to find several new friends in the LSDLN fandom who have taught me a lot about monickers and nicknames and phrases in different regional dialects of Spanish.

19. First fandom you wrote for? Technically it was Digimon Adventure - baby's first Mary-Sue fic

20. Favourite fic you've written? It's a tie between "In the Long Hours of the Night" and "The Many Faces of Wisdom". With the former, this was the fic where I first felt like I finally got Quinn Trevelyan. It was the fic where he emerged as a more formed and complete character and I'm still proud of it. With the latter, it was an experimental idea that toyed with a rather ambiguously-defined relationship between Solas and the Inquisitor. It also was the first time I played around with writing Fade scenes and spirits and you can see a lot of the building blocks that I would eventually revisit and explore more as I fleshed out my own lore. It's also the one fic where I started with a very specific image in my mind and that I would really love to commission art for one day.

Blank Form Under the Cut

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

3. What fandoms do you write for?

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

5. Do you respond to comments?

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

8. Do you get hate on fics?

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

14. What's your all time favorite ship?

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

16. What are your writing strengths?

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

19. First fandom you wrote for?

20. Favorite fic you've written?

[buginateacup]

🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings

🪐 ⇢ name three good things going on in your life right now

🍬 ⇢ post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character

🌿 ⇢ give some advice on writer's block and low creativity

🦋 ⇢ share something that has been on your heart and mind lately 

:green beetle: ⇢ add 50 words to your current wip and share the paragraph here (emoji is not working for me smh)

🍄 ⇢ share a head canon for one of your favourite ships or pairings

I was gonna say Drifter/Eris and that they both smell really weird in very different ways...

But let's be honest I gotta go Megarox. Megamind is a flower eater, he enjoys nectar, and Roxanne can and will encourage this, usually by bringing him flowers or when they go on walks in parks together (night walks, naturally. Those are the best kind), she plucks flowers and feeds them to him, usually by shoving them in his face because she is a terrible gremlin and it's why we love her.

🪐 ⇢ name three good things going on in your life right now

My wife came out to a bunch of our friends and they are all so loving and supportive! She smiles so much now!

We are getting a patio installed out the back! It only took 7 years but finally we can eat out there without having to balance on gravel

There is a very cute cat loafing beside me

🍬 ⇢ post an unpopular opinion about a popular fandom character

This is not me trying to yuck anyone's yum but I really, really cannot stand casting Megamind and Roxanne in parental roles for Keiko or her calling them her parents. It squicks me out to the point of repulsion. I am all for feral aunt and uncle to a wild niece, but fun characters who are NOT reduced to parenting (reluctant or otherwise) in sequels are so few and far between that I just don't want to see it. They can be supportive and caring without having to force everyone into Nuclear Family Unit.

And sure, a lot of this stems from growing up with the expectation in both media and irl that of COURSE becoming a parent is the only outcome for you. But that doesn't make it any less of an ick! We SHOULD be getting more non nuclear family options, we SHOULD be getting more it takes a village. But if your only approach to setting characters up as a family is to make them "Here is the mummy and here is the daddy and here is the baby" just no. Please. There are a thousand more possibilities there, open your mind.

🌿 ⇢ give some advice on writer's block and low creativity

Go for a walk, take some music with you, or do dishes or sweep (also with music).

Additionally, if you're wanting to write something but are holding off to find out if future canon will change things, stop waiting. Just go. Do you think we'd have anywhere near the creativity and wildness of fanfic if we had to stop and wait for canon's blessing every time. it's FANFIC! Who fucking cares if canon contradicts you down the track, it's not gonna be any less fanfic for waiting!

(I do think we actually saw a drop in the level of creativity and engagement with fandom ideas when the show was announced, which is a bummer. Kill the cop in your brain. Write shit that will be immediately contradicted, have someone come to your completely disproven fic years down the line and go "I thought this was going to not work because we know X but holy shit this is a whole new way of looking at things!")

🦋 ⇢ share something that has been on your heart and mind lately

I uh....no thoughts, head empty. How do I stop my cat attacking me for wearing jeans in the house? I got my other rants out up above so... *le shrug*

:green beetle: ⇢ add 50 words to your current wip and share the paragraph here (emoji is not working for me smh)

Oh you sneaky little shit, you got me writing!

(context: Look we aint supposed to let the prisoners get gifts. There's a whole chapter in the handbook about what happened last time we let the kid get so much as a bobby pin.

But you tell me how I'm meant to turn down such a sweet little old lady when she comes in with two pristine old shoe boxes, all carefully packed with tissue and hands one to the kid and the other to the repoter and with a quavery little voice about how she and her husband, god rest his soul, used to go dancing every saturday night for almost forty years and how they entered the ameature ballroom competitions together. Told us they were the last pairs they brought together, before the cancer took him and oh she'd never get these on over her bunions now but it would do her old heart good to see some use coming to these shoes which hadn't seen the light of day in nigh on twenty years.)

There's only so much a man can take right before retirement.

I might have been able to hold her off if she hadn't handed one of the boxes to Miss Primetime, who looked really touched and immediately buckled herself into a pair of sparkly red shoes to the encouragement of all the old biddies.

So now the kid's the proud owner of a pair of actual ballroom dance shoes, all polished black to go with the bright orange jumpsuit.

[nekoannie-chan]

Real identity

Title: Real identity.

Fandom: Marvel, Captain America.

Ship: N/A.

Word count: 171 words.

Square: C4 “Captain HYDRA Steve.”

Rating: Teen.

Summary: S.H.I.E.L.D. discovers the real Steve’s identity.

Major Tags: Captain HYDRA, double agent.

Additional tags: This is my entry to @steverogersbingo Steve Rogers Bingo round 3. SB3090.

Links: Wattpad, Ao3, Spanish version.

@saiyanprincessswanie

My native language is Spanish so I wanna improve my writing skills in English if you notice any mistakes, please let me know and I will correct them.

I don’t give any kind of permission for my fics to be posted on other platforms or languages (I translate myself my work) or the use of my graphics (my dividers are included in this), I did them exclusively for my fics, please respect my work and don't steal it. There are some people here who make dividers that anyone can use, mine is not this type, please look for the other people. The only exception is the ones I gifted 'cuz now belong to someone else. If you find any of my works on a different platform and are not one of my accounts, please let me know. Reblogs and comments are always welcome.

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Marvel's characters (unfortunately), except for the original characters and the story.

Add yourself to my taglist here.

My other media where I publish:  Ao3, Wattpad, ffnet, TikTok, Instagram, Twitter. 

If you like it, please vote, comment, and give me feedback to improve my skills and reblog.

Tags: @sinceimetyou @unnuevosoltransformalarealidad @navybrat817 @angrythingstarlight @shield-agent78 @charmed-asylum @pandaxnienke @real-fbi @Smokeandnailz @white-wolf1940 @tenaciousperfectionunknown @xoxonotme @bluemusickid @leyannrae @Harrysthiccthighss @Marvelatthisone @caplanbuckybarnes @sapphire-rogers @lizzieolseniskinda @notyourtypicalrose @hallecarey1 @nana1000night @talia-rumlow @writingshae @alexxavicry @azulatodoryuga @daemonslittlebitch @chaoticcollectivenightmare @endlesstwanted @chemtrails-club  @marigoldreamer @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @Here4thefanfics @theestorm @patzammit @kmc1989 @somegirlfromasgard @rogersbarber

Steve cursed; his secret was never supposed to come out; he didn't know how it had happened; he had kept it hidden for decades; but now all of S.H.I.I.E.L.D. knew that Steve was actually Captain HYDRA and had infiltrated.

He now found himself in one of S.H.I.E.L.D.'s halls, surrounded by "friends" (they had always been his enemies) and other staff.

Natasha refused to believe it at first. However, the evidence was irrefutable: recordings, transcripts of meetings, and covert operations all pointed to Steve as Captain HYDRA.

“This has to be a trap," Sam said as he went over the documents again and again.

“It's not, Sam," Maria Hill replied, her voice low. We've checked everything. Steve Rogers is the enemy.

“Steve, how could you do this?“ Natasha shouted.

“It's simple, Natasha," Steve replied in a cold voice. HYDRA is the future. And I have always fought for a better future.

With that said, in one swift move, Steve fled the scene; he was now the number one enemy sought by S.H.I.E.L.D.