#i was so stressed i ended up leaving my wallet at home and then panicking because my dentist is private because who the hell can get in

[fingertipsmp3]

Why do I have a dentist appointment tomorrow man. Why is this something I have to do

[decentishoutsidersthoughts]

I need more on this Foster AU!!!!

Sorry this took so long this week kicked my ass ten times over (the only days I was home from school before 8 were Thursday and Friday)

They’re referring to this au for anyone curious

I wanna talk more about the Curtis bros relationship cause it’s cute. Soda is the first to move in with Darry. Basically Darry catches Soda trying to steal his wallet a few days after they meet (he feels bad but also you have to do what you have to do. He honestly did plan on just taking a few dollars and then giving it back to him and pretending it was dropped). Long story short Darry offers him a place to stay for a couple days, but time passes and Darry starts realizing that something is wrong and also notices that Soda is so much happier even after just a few days of having a safe roof over his head and consistent food intake-. So he doesn’t kick Soda out and Soda doesn’t try to leave, and Darry starts to genuinely love him like a little brother even without knowing they’re related. He tries to get him to tell him anything about his past but Soda still stays very secretive. So Darry lets it go over time.

Soda loves Darry so much and wants to tell him they’re actually brothers so bad. At first he was more just thrilled to be allowed to live somewhere safe, and all he had to do to stay was find a part time job to help with bills. After a few weeks of being with Darry everything that happened at his old home and while he was on the run catches up to him. He starts getting a lot of nightmares and breakdowns but does okay at hiding them until one night he breaks something at the house while fooling around. He ends up full on panicking (Darry yells at him for trying to pick up broken glass with his bare hands which doesn’t help-) and Darry just kind of sits with him and talks to him until he calms down. After that his walls come down a little bit more, he tells Darry some things but leaves out anything that could tie to his identity. 

Darry is also trying really hard to fix things with Ponyboy but he is NOT having it-. Darry invites him to do things and is turned down every time and it’s honest to God stressing him out. Ponyboy is trying really hard not to give in because he doesn’t want to forgive or love Darry since he’s so hell bent on convincing himself he’s fine on his own. But when his birthday comes (something he’s given up on celebrating) Darry buys him a book and he doesn’t turn it down. That night his foster parents get into a really ugly argument and he leaves before realizing he has nowhere to go. So, yeah, he ends up at the Curtis house and crashes on the couch. It starts becoming a more common thing after that, but Ponyboy is like ‘this isn’t me forgivng you I just don’t have any other option’. However, he immediately gets attached to Soda because he doesn’t know it’s Soda (he’s livid when he eventually finds out). Him and Darry butt heads and argue a lot, but they’re a lot more careful about it because Soda is so obviously freaked out whenever it happens. And over time Ponyboy understands that it wasn’t Darry’s fault, and Darry apologizes for him being left alone. And they all are one big happy family :3

[writertitan]

Midnight Snacks

pairing: eren x reader 

words: 2058

themes: college au, lots of fluff, eren being a little embarrassing with his gas station order 

requested by anon

Finals week had both you and Eren on high alert and in high panic. Truth be told, you didn’t need to really worry that much; you had prepared yourself for this all semester and had really kept up with your workload. Mostly, you were just stressed about the finals themselves and how, well, final they were. And so close together. A gift and a curse. You’d be done before finals week was even over. 

What really had you in a panic was Eren. The boy, bless his heart, was not apt for cramming. He’d kept up with his work like you had, but you knew him like the back of your hand; he was prone to leaving the harder things until the last minute. 

You glanced at your phone to check the time as Eren flipped back and forth between a page in his biology textbook, grumbling to himself under his breath. It was almost 12:30 in the morning and both of you had been at it all night, cramming and rememorizing things just to be prepared, and Eren especially was deep in concentration. You smiled to yourself as you watched his brows furrow even more than they already were, a feat you thought impossible. Just as you set your phone down to continue your own last-minute preparations, Eren sat up straight with a growl and pushed his textbook off your bed with his knee. 

“I feel like my head’s about to explode,” he complained, flopping over onto your lap. His eyes found yours immediately and he pouted as he reached up to stroke your cheek, then turned his head to glare at your textbook, as if personally offended by it, and pushed it off your bed to join his own. 

“Eren,” you whined, about to push his head off your lap, but he stopped you by reaching both hands up to cup your face. 

“C’mon, let’s just take a small break. We’re probably gonna be at this for a few more hours,” he said, fingers lightly caressing your jaw to entice you into going with his plan. You pondered it, then thought about arguing back with him about needing to study, but then realized he was probably right. All of this endless cramming with no break was just going to end up in you not retaining any of it. 

“Just a small break,” you relented, giving him a warning stare. He sat up, much brighter now, and pulled you off your bed immediately. He stretched his legs out and then reached his arms up to the ceiling for a full body stretch, already in a better mood. 

“Let’s go buy some snacks,” he suggested, wrapping an arm around your shoulders to pull you in. “That’ll help with the brain juice.” 

You hated Eren’s term, brain juice, but you knew he had a point. You had to keep up your energy. 

“Okay, let’s go to the vending machines and pick something out,” you said, moving to put some shoes on. 

“There’s a convenience store just down the street, babe. Please can we go? Your dorm’s vending machines aren’t gonna cut it,” he said, the pout back again. You rolled your eyes playfully but again relented, happy to just get out of your dorm room for a second. 

“Okay, fine. But you’re not supposed to be here, remember? It’s way past visiting hours. We have to be so sneaky,” you said, voice already lowering to a whisper. If you’re RA found out you’d been holing Eren up in your dorm well past 10pm, she was going to lose her mind. 

Eren made a show of zipping his lips and acting stealthy, which made you snort. You grabbed his hand after putting on shoes and jackets, and carefully slipped out to start your trek to the convenience store. 

You had to admit, it was a nice idea. And Eren was right, your vending machines didn’t hold a candle to all the other savory treats you really wanted. 

The night was a little breezy, but the impending summer weather kept the spring chill at bay. Eren had your hand engulfed in his, fingers laced as he swung your hands lightly, other hand messing with his loose bun. The night wrapped around him beautifully, streetlights casting glows that defined the most handsome parts of his face. 

He caught you staring after a minute of him being deep in thought, and you flashed him a mischievous grin which he returned.

“Take a picture, it’ll last longer,” he teased, the lame phrase making you giggle. 

“Okay,” you said cheerily, which took him off guard. You pulled your hand from his and giggled again at his confusion, before moving to stand behind him, hands reaching up to grasp his shoulders and give a small tug to make him stop walking. He knew immediately what you were getting at and crouched down enough to let you hop on, catching you easily and gripping your thighs as you wrapped an arm around your shoulders. Your other hand reached into your pocket to pull out your phone and you wasted no time in pulling up the camera app, jutting your arm out so you could capture Eren’s face right next to yours, the two of you flashing cheesy and ridiculous smiles as you snapped the picture. The automatic flash activated due to the low lighting and Eren whined and blinked, squeezing his eyes shut as the flash went off. 

When you looked at the end result, you showed Eren with a pleased laugh. You looked fine, all smiles and bright eyes. Eren, on the other hand, had blinked a little too soon. His eyes were shut, eyebrows raised, a dopey grin on his face that matched yours. 

“Delete that,” he complained, letting go of one thigh to try to reach for your phone. You were too fast, however, and eased it back into your jacket pocket. “Babe, delete it!”

“Nope! That’s my new favorite picture of us.” 

“I’m not buying you any snacks once we get there.” 

A lie, completely. If anything, Eren would play the little devil on your shoulder and egg you on in just a few minutes, into making not-so-smart choices. Why choose between the chocolate and the gummies when you can have both? 

You moved to hop off once you were in front of the store, but Eren’s grip tightened on your thighs. You angled your head to give him a confused glance, which he ignored, but he turned his head to peck your lips. 

“We’ll be quick. You’ll be my hands,” he said, and you rolled your eyes at his words, but hid your big smile into his shoulder. You knew he could feel the way your lips turned up over the thin fabric of his jacket and even thinner shirt. 

“Alright, what do you want?” you asked him, letting him lead you where you knew he’d go first: the Lunchables. 

“Ham and cheese and crackers, please,” he requested, but you already knew that and were grabbing at it with one hand. He kissed your wrist as a thank you and then asked, “Okay, what are we getting you? The usual?” 

“Yes, please,” you hummed, nuzzling into his neck as he made his way over to your preferred snack of choice. And, after grabbing two drinks, your hands absolutely full, you made your way to the counter to pay. The clerk gave you a bored look, not at all interested in the sight in front of him, and rang up your items slowly and announced your total. 

A contest as always, you and Eren both reached for your wallets. He somehow managed to be quicker, mostly because you were trying your best not to lose your balance as you held onto him with one arm and fished around for money with the other, and you grumbled as he paid for both of you. 

You held onto the bag as you exited the convenience store, again trying to hop off, and again being secured in place by Eren’s tight grip. 

“Aren’t you getting tired?” you asked him, genuinely curious, but Eren nearly guffawed at the question. 

“Are you joking? I wouldn’t even consider this a warm-up, babe. Carrying Jean’s blacked-out ass home after a party, though... that’ll make me break a sweat. I don’t know how he’s so fucking heavy.” 

You giggled, vividly remembering one of those times, and you rested your head on Eren’s shoulder after letting a yawn slip out. 

“I wish we didn’t have to go back to studying after this,” you pouted, pressing a pouty kiss into Eren’s shoulder. “I hate finals.” 

“Let’s eat our snacks before we get back to it,” Eren compromised. “My brain still feels heavy with knowledge. I gotta let it soak it all up.” 

“Always saying the weirdest things,” you teased him, squealing at the pinch on your thigh. 

Sneaking up to your dorm room was as easy as sneaking out, and you pulled Eren for a quick kiss as soon as the door locked behind you. You tossed the bag onto your bed and then began fishing your snacks out once your shoes and jacket were off and you were both able to situate more comfortably on your bed. Eren held you in his lap as he leaned back against your wall and browsed through his phone, the two of you watching dumb compliations on YouTube while you snacked. It was nice to turn your brain off just for a while, to rest up and come back to studying rejuvenated. 

His hand would occasionally sneak up your neck and grab at your hair, lightly massaging your scalp as he pressed tender kisses to your temple. You shared your snacks and really took your time with finishing, letting yourselves soak in your study break. 

“Thanks for making me take a break,” you told him, leaning your head back against his chest. “I forget sometimes.” 

“I know you do,” Eren chuckled, squeezing you into a hug and pressing you into his chest even more. He noticed yet another suppressed yawn from you and hummed in acknowledgement, and you knew what he was going to say before he said it. 

“I can’t go to sleep, I have to keep studying,” you said, beating him to it. 

“You’re studying for your final tomorrow and it’s not even until noon. You know a really important habit before taking a big test is to get enough sleep before it.” 

Damn it. You hated when he used logic against you. 

“Fine, but just a nap,” you grumbled, sitting up to grab at your trash and discard it in your bin. You set an alarm and gave Eren a tired smile. “I’m gonna drag you down with me, though. You need to sleep too.” 

Eren scoffed, his voice a little panicked when he spoke again. “No way. Unlike you, I have to cram. I’m nowhere near ready for my final tomorrow.” 

“Yours isn’t until the afternoon,” you pointed out, hitting him back with the logic he’d used on you. “Like you said, a good habit is to get plenty of sleep before a test.” 

Eren sighed, but you could tell he wasn’t going to argue with you. He looked just as tired as you and the two of you arranged yourselves in your cramped bed to doze off, if only for a little bit. 

His hands found your hair and he played with it softly as you both curled up into one another. 

“Love you,” he murmured, drowsy already, and you smiled to yourself, head on his chest with your hand tracing loving circles at his torso. 

“Love you too,” you answered, warming at the soft touch of his hand on your chin. He tilted your head up to steal a quick kiss to your lips, then to your nose. You closed your eyes and let yourself relax, about to really drift off when you felt Eren shift under you. 

Your ears picked up the quiet sounds of Eren taking your phone from your nightstand. You peeked an eye open, careful to stay quiet lest you arouse suspicion, and resisted the urge to let a huge grin overcome you as you watched him go to your camera roll, tap on the ridiculous picture you’d taken earlier, and send it to himself. 

[autumn-writes]

Hello! May I request Nagito with insecure s/o that often skips meals and does unhealthy stuff?

sure thing! as someone who does a lot of unhealthy stuff on a daily basis (pls i can't help it </3) this hits close to home. don't follow my example ><! always be sure to take care of yourself!!

notes; headcanons below are not proofread, do expect typos and errors here and there. i haven't watched any danganronpa gameplay in a while so please do bear with me if nagito is extremely ooc </3 i'm slowly watching gameplays again so i can get back into the fandom

Nagito Komaeda with an S/O who has a very unhealthy lifestyle

nagito komaeda — ultimate lucky student

i could not think of a way to mix the two subjects together although they're a very common pair- so i made separate thoughts for them :D! let's start with the insecure part

woooohhhh boy, nagito is also very insecure of himself so hah- expect compliments from him that include degrading speech directed to himself

"you look beautiful, y/n" "really? you... think so?" "more beautiful than the sun at sunset. i honestly can't believe that someone as beautiful as you would be with someone as trashy as me—"

cut him off there before he does a whole speech on how he doesn't deserve you

whenever you achieve something he's the first person to congratulate and compliment you! he's very supportive <3

if ever you feel insecure about yourself, may it be about your appearance, your personality or your intelligence, he's immediately shutting down every negative word about yourself that leaves that pretty mouth of yous and instead counters with compliments and reassurance!

he just— can't see all the bad stuff that you see and he wishes you could see just how much he admires you and how he sees you as someone so far above him.

even if it takes a million compliments to get you to see yourself the way he sees you, he'll be sure to gift you 100 compliments for every flaw and imperfection that only you seem to spot.

now onto the unhealthy lifestyle hcs :)!

i personally headcanon nagito as someone who doesn't know how to take care of himself very well

yes he can cook, bathe, clean, watch his hygiene and all those other stuff but when it comes to just generally taking care of himself like eating his meals, sleeping early or keeping himself well kempt? he's not quite the best in those areas

nagito wants you to take care of yourself so bad but he can't even watch out for himself :( so he tries to make a few changes here and there to his own schedule that end up benefiting both him and you :>

every morning before school starts, nagito is sure to head over to your house with some food that he either made himself, or got at a shop/bakery before heading to your house

knocks a few times before entering your house with a spare key you gave him, and if he finds you still asleep when he goes to your room, he'll just let you rest for a few more moments knowing that you slept late the previous night and instead decides to prepare some of your stuff for the day and make you something to drink for when you wake up :) he's a sweetheart < 3

nagito is a malewife

when you're awake he greets you good morning and compliments you on how beautiful you look which makes you blush before carefully ushering you to the bathroom so you can prepare yourself for the day before going with you to school

whenever it's lunch time he's sure to accompany you to the cafeteria so he can buy you lunch. he's not letting you pay cause he believes he should be treating you to food and not the other way around. won't allow you to split the funds either >:( but that's okay you just quietly slip a dollar into his wallet when he isn't looking

actually he did see he just keeps quiet about it cause he finds it cute how you really want to pay him back even though he said that the food is 100% on him and he just wants to see you happy :)

after classes if you two have homework or projects or a test, he'll accompany you to the library so you two can get some stuff done. he doesn't want you to end up panicking over deadlines or approaching test dates and then end up stressing yourself out which leads to cramming and sleepless nights

if you don't have anything to worry about he'll go with you to a cafe so you two can eat something and just spend time with each other

idk why but i can envision him just going "let's get some food? i have a feeling that you'll skip dinner tonight which isn't hopeful at all" with a playful smile while you lightly elbow his side

brings you home and reminds you of your plans for tomorrow and to sleep early tonight before heading home— not before getting his lil nose kiss tho :) he can't leave without it, makes him think he didn't do a good job as ur bf today (which isn't true he deserves all the kisses he can get. you did a great job today boyfie nagi :>)

when it's a bit a late, around 9:30 or 10 he'll check if you're awake and if you still are, he'll tell you to go to sleep

if you can't sleep however, he'll chat with you until you end up getting tired

if that doesn't work he'll nervously ask if you want to video chat

"would you like to uh, video chat perhaps?" "hm?" "of course, i can understand if you wouldn't wish to see me right now. who would even want to listen to me and have my voice be the final thing someone hears at ni—" "i'd love to have a video chat with you nagi :D!"

you broke him when you sent that message but he's quick to start a video chat with you

you two talk until nagito can see you peacefully snoozing off (he takes a picture of you sleeping cause he thinks you look adorable)

10/10 would recommend as a boyfriend who takes care of you :) he just really cares for you and wants you to take care of yourself. though the best part of taking care of you is that in turn, he was also able to take care of himself <3 yay!

here you go anon! sorry this was late but i hope you like these <3! do tell me if you wish for these to be redone. take care and stay always my lovelies!

[babyyweebbitch]

Hello again 🤗. May I request Tenya Iida x Pregnant!reader where the reader gets captured by villans. Tenya is at this time at work and when he comes home the door is broken and a few windows too. He is really angry at the villans and calls Deku and Shoto immediately so that they can help him. The end is open to you . 😅😁 I hope it's not to long of an request.

A/N: Hello! I’ll do my best for you! Sorry it took long to get to! Also I’m honestly really sorry if it’s horrible

Tenya Iida x Pregnant!reader

Genre: Angst (maybe??) fluff + comedy (towards the end)

Characters: Iida, Shoto, Deku & Reader

Warnings: Kidnapping

It seemed like a normal day, Before tenya went off to work he kissed his wife goodbye, kissed her belly as if saying goodbye to his baby and he went off to work

It was a long day, he did a lot of paperwork, had two meetings and he ended up finishing early since he didn’t have that much to do so he texted His wife on break.

She didn’t answer and he assumed she was asleep so he texted her one final time “I’ll be home probably early tonight. Have a good nap!”

He did get worried since his wife always responded immediately and if not immediately within 20 minutes, her naps weren’t that long

7:42 P.M

Iida got home about an hour early and he was very worried since Y/N wasn’t answering his calls or texts and he was worried not only for her but their baby

Once he got in the driveway he immediately got out the car and walked up the walkway to their front door, he was greeted with a broken door, window and a few things in the house broken

“Y/N?!” Iida ran frantically around the house and he couldn’t find her so he immediately went to call Deku

“Hello?” Deku was nearly cut off by a panicking Iida

“Deku!? Have you heard from Y/N today?”

“No. I was gonna go over and see if she needed me to do get her anything since you were at work but I tried to call her and she didn’t answer. Why what’s wrong?”

“Someone broke in and took her!”

“Wait what?!” Now Deku was panicking, on Dekus side Iida can hear him running around almost tripping to get his shoes on “I’ll be there in a few minutes!” Then he hung up

Iida didn’t wanna bother anyone else but he called Shoto

“Yeah?”

“Someone broke into my house and Y/N isn’t here anymore!”

Shoto sat there for a second in silence before realising that she was pregnant still “I’ll be there!” And the call ended

Iida was panicking and he didn’t want to sit there any longer, usually he wouldn’t get himself into trouble but it’s his wife and baby’s life on the line here.

So he walked inside to try and find something until he found a note in his bedroom

“We took her. And we want money. When you decide you want your wife back we’ll be in an abandoned warehouse outside of Tokyo, you can’t really miss it. Don’t worry, we didn’t do anything to her but you have three days before we kill her and your precious baby” Read the note

Iida knew this wasn’t the LoV because they wouldn’t leave a note like this so it had to be other villains that they’ve had a run in with in the past

After a few minutes Shoto and Deku rushed inside

“Iida! Did you find anything?!” Deku said just as worried as he was

“A note. Get in my car we’re going!” Iida said as he tossed the note towards Deku and took off his suit jacket he had on so he was only in a dress shirt and tie

The three entered the car and Iida sped off. Usually he’d go the speed limit but right now he’s a speed demon. He’ll take shortcuts and speed past cars. Thankfully they didn’t get pulled over that either 20 minute drive that should have 45

They pulled up by the warehouse, Iida almost got out before Shoto stopped him

“You can’t go in there all recklessly... You don’t know what quirks they have and what they’ll do to Y/N if you do”

“That’s why I’m gonna give them my wallet and watch. I can replace my wallet and watch but I can’t replace a wife and baby”

Deku knew what Iida was planning by the way he said it, the watch he has Y/N gave to him as an anniversary present and he wouldn’t trade it for the world, plus he noticed that during their drive he tapped something on his belt

“we’ll be behind you, Iida!” Deku commented as the three men got out the car

The three walked to the warehouse doors and opened them, he saw his wife and five villains there

“Iida!” Y/N yelled as she was tied to a chair, she didn’t look hurt at all

“Do you have what we asked for in the note?” One villain said

“That was quick. You must love her a lot” another said

“I don’t have cash... I never carry any on me but here...” Iida tossed his wallet and watch a good distance from him “my card should have a few hundred thousand on it”

There was silence as everyone stood there just staring at each other, Y/N stared at Deku since they were very close and they can read each other’s facial expressions very well, Shoto and Iida never got that connection the two had

Deku gave a slight nod to her then she lifted her feet up from the floor and then tapped Iida and Shoto on the arm

“Freeze the floor Shoto” Deku said as Shoto was confused but still stomped his foot causing the floor to freeze and anyone in front of the three would be frozen to the floor, the ice spread very quickly, it was so quick that the villains didn’t even see it coming

Everything but Y/N and the tree were frozen to the floor so Iida quickly but carefully walked over to her and untied her before examining her body to make sure no bruises were there

“Your watch and your wallet babe...”

“I took everything out my wallet and wore a watch that looked like that one” Iida said, he was always one to think ahead, he helped her walk on the ice that covered the floor and she went to hug Deku once she got to him

“Y/N! I was so worried about you!” Deku cried as he hugged her but made sure not to hurt the baby

“I know! I told them you guys would be here but they didn’t listen to me! Stupid villains!”

“I will never ever understand your relationship” Shoto said as they all walked out the warehouse together while Deku and Y/N talked getting into the back seat together, Iida in the drivers and Shoto in the passenger

“Hey Iida. When you tapped your belt what was it for?” Deku asked as he looked at Iida while he drove

“To give the police my location. Everyone at my work has one just in case something like this happens”

“So THATS why you randomly got a new belt!” Y/N said

“Oh yeah, I never told you about that. Oops!” Iida jokingly said, he was just happy his wife and the baby was okay

This was one time he was actually not a goody two shoes since he knew his wife but have been stressed

“What did they do or say?”

“Huh? Oh well I just kept annoying them with my endless talking. They said if I didn’t shut up they’d just give me back without the money. I was talking about Giraffes before you guys came in”

“Knowing you, I don’t doubt that happened” Shoto said with a chuckle

“I also told them facts that they probably didn’t wanna hear or it just traumatised them”

“What did you tell them?” Deku asked

“Wait no no-!” Shoto and Iida said in perfect unison

They both knew that she would be talking for a while so this would be an interesting car ride, Deku and Y/N can go on for hours about random facts to Deku was very interested in these facts

[agerefandom]

The Doctor’s Office

Fandom: Twilight

Characters: cg!Carlisle Cullen, regressor!reader (gender-neutral), brief appearances of OCs

Words: 3,600

Summary: You’ve always had trouble with doctor appointments. The stress proves to be too much, and you regress at the doctor’s office. Luckily, Dr. Cullen seems to be sympathetic and caring.

Warnings: Lots of medical anxiety and imagery, needles/shots, anxiety regression, unplanned public regression, panic attacks.

You’ve never liked going to the doctor. The medical smell of the office, the paper on the weird squishy bench, the impersonal poking and prodding of the annual check-up. When you were a child, you would cry all the way there.

Now you’re an adult, and you have to drive yourself. Your hands are tense on the wheel and you can feel the anxiety pounding at your ribs. You wish you’d outgrown your fear of doctor’s appointments, but there are still some things that get the panicked toddler in your head screaming.

You take one hand off the steering wheel, reaching blindly towards the passenger seat while keeping your eyes on the road ahead. The rough texture of your backpack meets your fingers, and you relax. You’ve brought a little comfort bag: your favourite stuffie, a snack for afterwards, and your headphones in the front pocket. You have music, you have a fidget toy in your pocket, and you are going to survive this.

You pull into the little parking lot, feeling very brave. This is Forks, and the doctor’s office is small like everything else. It’s your first time here, which doesn’t help your nerves: you’re new in town, and while you could drive to Seattle and go to one of the larger offices, the longer drive would just make it easier for you to chicken out on the way.

Your coworkers had recommended Dr. Cullen, and you’d taken their advice. It took a little longer to get an appointment because Dr. Cullen works three days a week in Seattle, but you were happy for the appointment to be as far away as possible.

Unfortunately, the future always became the present, and now you’re just sitting in the car and delaying the inevitable.

With a sigh, you grab your comfort bag and make for the front door. The smell hits you as soon as you get inside: clean and sharp with disinfectant.

You clutch the straps of your backpack and approach the front desk, trying for a smile when the secretary looks up. She’s a kind looking woman who matches the voice you’d heard on the phone. Looks like she probably has photos of her kids in her wallet. “Hello dear, do you have an appointment?”

“I do. With Dr. Cullen, at 2 o’clock?” You give your name and health card when required, receiving a stack of paperwork in return. 

The woman gives you a pen and a smile, then gestures to the empty sitting area. “Go take a seat, fill out your forms, and I’ll let Carlisle know you’ve arrived.” She bustles off down the hall, leaving you in a silent room.

You immediately put on your headphones, blocking out the quiet with your favourite playlist to calm down. There are clipboards on the tables, and you snag one to fill out the paperwork. Most of this is familiar by now, but there are plenty of account numbers you have to look up on your phone. Eventually, the stack is finished, and you glance up to see the secretary returned while you were busy with papers and music. She’s tapping away at the computer, and you approach her timidly with your paperwork.

She jumps a little when she sees you standing in front of her, but quickly smiles and accepts the stack of paperwork. “Thank you very much!” She points at the hallway to her right. “You can go on to the room at the end of the hall, with the door open. Carlisle will be with you in just a few minutes.”

“Thanks.” You collect your bag from the seating area, half-tempted to hug it to your chest and get some comfort from the stuffie hidden inside, but instead you swing it onto your back and trudge down the hallway, one hand finding the fidget cube in your pocket and playing with the switches to distract you from your rising anxiety.

The room is empty: you put your bag carefully on the ground and hop up onto the examination table. The crinkle of the wax paper fills you with dread: you bring the cube out of your pocket and keep yourself busy with it, turning it over and over in your hands.

The silence stretches, but you don’t want to put your headphones on and miss the doctor coming in. The clicking of the buttons on your fidget cube are too loud in the room. Every time you shift, the paper crinkles underneath you. You try not to look at the diagrams on the wall, the medical instruments and cotton balls beside the computer on the desk.

“Ah, my two o’clock!” an unfamiliar voice says from the door. You glance up, startled by the lack of footsteps to announce the new person.

The person standing in the doorway is presumably Dr. Cullen, and you understand why your coworkers had been giggling about him now. The man looks like a fashion model, not a doctor for a little town like Forks. He smiles, and it’s like you can hear the little ‘ding’ sound effect as his teeth shine at you.

“That’s me,” you manage.

He retrieves a clipboard from under his arm and reads out your name, glancing up to check that it’s correct. You nod, and he walks forward to offer his hand.

“Dr. Carlisle Cullen,” he says. His handshake is perfect, cool and firm around your hand, which you’re suddenly aware is a little bit sweaty. “It’s good to meet you.”

“You too.” He’s even more striking up close, you can’t even pick the features that stand out because they’re all perfect. His eyes are a hypnotizing colour, almost golden. You avert your gaze, self-conscious in the presence of his perfectly pressed white coat and flawless hair.

“So, I see you haven’t had a general check-up in a few years,” Doctor Cullen says, finally retreating and flipping a page over on his clipboard. You immediately clasp your hands on your lap, resisting the urge to kick your legs back and forth. “New to Forks?”

“Yes, just moved.” You scored a nice apartment: living prices are good out here, with the significant commute to most cities. You have a few more boxes to unpack, but you’re not fussed about finishing. “It’s a nice town.”

“One of my favourite places I’ve lived.” Dr. Cullen sounds genuinely fond of the town, not just making small-talk as he boots up the computer and puts your file on the desk. “Have you been to the diner on Maple Street yet?”

“I haven’t.” You don’t like going out alone, and you haven’t really made any friends yet. There are a few coworkers that you want to talk to more, but you’re not at the level where you can ask them out for coffee yet. “It’s good?”

“The best,” Dr. Cullen assures you.

“Have you… lived many places?” You watch his fingers move across the keyboard, somehow entranced. Even his nails are perfect, each one buffed to a shine. He must get manicures.

“I’m a big fan of travel,” the doctor admits. “I’ve visited almost every country in the world.”

“Wow.” Doctors make a lot of money, you remember. No way someone could travel that much without being rich. He doesn’t look that old, either, maybe thirty? Young for a doctor, anyways. “And Forks is your favourite? Really?” It’s a nice town, with the forests stretching around it, but it’s not exactly the height of culture.

“I was fond of Italy.” Dr. Cullen seems to have contented himself with the computer, and turns back to you. “St. Petersburg is lovely as well, but Forks feels like home to me.” He takes a pair of gloves from the box on the desk, and you watch him slip them on. You’d been busy with the conversation, enough that you’d almost forgotten that you were here for a check-up, but the sight of those latex gloves reminds you.

The small talk falls away, and Dr. Cullen asks you all the usual questions: any problems, how are you feeling, are you taking any medication. You answer them carefully, and he nods and takes the occasional note. When you mention trouble sleeping, he asks if that’s something you want to look into. You shake your head: it’s probably linked to your anxiety, and it’s never bad enough to affect you in the long-term. He doesn’t ask, just accepts the head shake and moves on smoothly.

The physical exam is as nerve-wracking as ever, gloved fingers pressing on your shoulder, keeping you still as he listens to your heart, to your breathing. He must be able to hear your heart racing with anxiety, but he doesn’t comment, moving through the procedures with professional swiftness.

“All seems well,” he declares at last. “You are behind on your vaccinations, however. I’d recommend a flu shot and the updated HBV vaccine, at least. There are a few more that can wait for next year, but flu season in Forks usually takes out the whole town.”

“Uh…” Oh, please no. Shots are not something you’re good at. “Okay, yeah.”

“They’re both covered by your current insurance,” Dr. Cullen adds, clearly sensing your apprehension.

“Cool.” You manage to nod, a jerky movement. “Sorry. I’m just bad at shots.”

“No worries.” Dr. Cullen smiles, and you find yourself feeling oddly reassured by the sincerity of his response. “I promise they’ll be quick. Count to ten, and they’ll both be done.”

“Promise?”

It slips out of your mouth before you can stop it, the nervous question of a child who has been lied to too many times.

“Pinky promise,” Carlisle assures you without batting an eye. “Just give me a moment to get ready.” He steps to the desk and starts moving things around. You look away, not wanting to see the needles as he prepares them.

“So, where did you move from?” the doctor asks conversationally. You answer automatically, your mind still running to catch up with the idea that you’re going to willingly get a flu shot. You’ve never gotten one before, why did you let him talk you into this? 

He asks about your move to Forks, and you tell him that it was fine. You tell him about the hiking trails that wind through the forest just behind your apartment building, and he asks how often you go walking.

Soon enough, the two of you are chatting about your favourite parks in the US, and it almost takes you by surprise when he rolls a table over to you. There’s a tray on it, with two needles that you quickly look away from.

It’s too late, though, you’ve already seen them. You don’t want to think about it. You almost wish your parents still came to your doctor’s appointments, at least you would have a hand to hold.

“Deep breaths,” Carlisle tells you, his voice soothing. “Remember, just count to ten and they’ll both be done.”

“Okay.” You close your eyes, and try to ignore the wet cotton-ball rubbing against your arm. “One… two…” The sharp sting makes you draw in your breath sharply, the fingers of your free arm clutching at the lip of the table you’re sitting on. “Three. Four. Five…” Pain again, this time drawing tears to your eyes. “Six… seven…”

“All done.” There’s light pressure on your shoulder, careful wiping. “Only seven seconds, there we are.” You open your eyes and see Carlisle pressing a cotton ball to your shoulder, his expression calm and focused. “No more pain,” he assures you.

But the tears are spilling down your cheeks, and the toddler inside your chest is furious that you allowed that to happen, and you can’t stand up to that anger. You need your stuffies. You need to be home with a blanket. You need a snack and a good cry and a bottle of warm milk.

“M’sorry,” you manage. He’ll notice the tears at some point. “M’bad at pain. Sorry.”

“No need to be sorry.” Carlisle lifts the cotton ball from your arm, and you can see the blood soaked into it. You hear yourself give an involuntary squeak, shutting your eyes again. “You’re alright,” Carlisle soothes. “I’ll get you a band-aid and something to drink.”

“Okay.” You sniffle and wipe the tears from your face, wincing at the ache in your left arm. “Sorry.”

“All fine. More common than you’d expect. Do you want a boring band-aid or a Disney princess? I’m afraid we’re all out of Spider-Man.”

You giggle a little at the question: it’s a silly thing to ask an adult. “Princess,” you say. Why not.

“There we are.” You feel his gloves on your arm again, applying the bandage with gentle professionalism. “All covered up.”

“T’nk you,” you say, and resist the urge to put your thumb in your mouth. Can’t do that at a doctor’s office. Too many germs.

“My penance for causing you pain,” says Carlisle in a very serious voice, which makes you laugh again. You didn’t know this doctor was so funny. “Now, would you like apple juice or orange juice?”

“A’ple!” You’d prefer a bottle of milk, but a sippy cup of juice is good too. You rub your eyes free of tears and open them again, just in time to see Carlisle stepping back in from the hallway carrying a box of juice. Did he go and get it in the second you were rubbing your eyes?

You blink away the mystery and make grabby hands at the juicebox, remembering a second too late that he’s your doctor and not your caregiver, and you can’t just make grabby hands at the things you want.

“Sorry!” You drop your hands to your sides, a wave of embarrassment pushing back your regression for a moment. You’re too tired to be fully an adult, the pain keeping you uncomfortably between two headspaces for a moment. “Sorry.”

“Still no need to be sorry. Hydration is important.” Carlisle puts the straw in for you and passes you the juice-box, which you sip eagerly. The sweet juice makes your head feel less stuffy from crying, and it helps with the pain too. Obviously, this is magic doctor juice. “Is there anything else I can get you?”

You shake your head, but your eyes fall on your backpack across the room. It would be so nice to hug your stuffie right now. It would be soft and big in your arms and you would feel so comfy, even if you’re still sitting on the horrible crinkly paper.

“Do you want something from your backpack?” Carlisle asks, following your eyes. “I can bring it to you.”

You hesitate. Some of your online friends said they brought stuffies to their doctor appointments. Would it be weird? Would he refuse to see you again? He’s so nice and he got you juice and you don’t want him to be mean to you.

You’re so busy worrying that you don’t notice that you’ve already raised a hand towards the backpack until Carlisle is obligingly putting it beside you. By then, the decision is already reached: you pull out your stuffie and cradle it in your arms, hiding your face in the fuzz.

“What a wonderful idea,” Carlisle’s voice comes from above you, still all kind and soothing. “Bringing a companion to the doctor’s office to tell you how brave you’ve been.”

“Mm-hmm.” Now that your friend is in your arms, you worry so much less. And Carlisle is still being nice, so it must not bother him.

“Alright.” Carlisle’s voice sounds serious: you glance up to see him standing in front of you, one hand outstretched. He’s not wearing gloves anymore.

You hesitantly put your hand in his, expecting him to pull you to your feet and maybe even usher you out the door, but instead he just holds your hand gently, leaning down to be at eye-level with you. “I have another appointment in five minutes, but I don’t want you driving right now. Doctor’s orders,” he adds with a smile. “You stay in here for as long as you need, and I’ll check in after my next appointment. You can go onto the big chair, if you like, but don’t touch anything on the desk or the walls.” You nod mutely. He’s leaving you here alone?

Although, you suppose you’re not here alone now that your stuffie is here.

“If you feel good enough to leave before I get back, that’s okay, but make sure to tell Steph at the front desk on your way out so I don’t worry. Otherwise, I’ll be back in half an hour.”

“Okay, Doctor,” you mumble into your stuffie.

“Call me Carlisle,” he smiles, and he looks back at you twice as he leaves the room.

Alone in the office, you shift uncomfortably, some of your anxiety coming back. But he said that you could go in the big rolling chair, so you skip off the doctor’s table and into the office chair in front of the computer. It’s huge and squishy and it rolls a bit when you sit down.

That’s where you stay, rolling yourself around and chatting to your stuffie, eventually pulling out your phone to play some music with your headphones. You know that you have to go sometime, but every time you think about going outside, you feel yourself start to panic. You’ll be seen! You’ll have to pretend to be big! You can’t do that. So you spin in the chair and hum along to favourite songs, and eventually inspect your arm to see what band-aid Carlisle gave you. It’s Princess Jasmine, which makes you happy.

All too soon, there’s a knock on the door, and Carlisle steps back in.

“Hello,” he greets you warmly.

“Hi.” His presence jolts you out of your regression, and the panic rises fast. You just regressed in a public space, and no matter how nice this doctor was about it, you were definitely acting weird. He forbade you from driving, for god’s sake. He probably thought you were high or something, maybe he even called the police…

“Oh, deep breaths. It’s alright.” Carlisle takes two steps forward and drops to his knees in front of your chair. The gesture catches you off-guard, almost startling you out of your gathering panic attack. “No one is angry. You aren’t in trouble.”

“Promise?” you manage, an echo of your earlier plea.

“Pinky promise.” This time, Carlisle holds up one hand, his pinky extended. You hook your finger into his, and he squeezes gently. “There we go.”

“I’m so sorry.” The panic and regression have both receded, leaving you exhausted and slightly embarrassed. “I didn’t expect that to happen. I get anxious at medical appointments, but that was worse than usual.”

“You’re in a new town, and I imagine you’re still exhausted from moving. It was very brave of you to come,” Carlisle tells you, and you can’t detect an ounce of sarcasm or judgement in his voice. “And you’re always welcome to bring a friend.” He hovers a hand over the stuffed animal beside you, just shy of touching it. You tug it a little closer, defensive, and he obediently withdraws.

“Thank you.” You want to hide your face in the stuffie again, but you’re not regressed anymore, and you do need to get home. If only to climb into bed and try to forget any of this happened. “I should, um.”

“Of course, I imagine you have things to do.” Carlisle gets to his feet, dusts off his knees where he had been kneeling on the floor. “I am truly sorry this appointment was so hard on you, but I’m happy that you came.”

You don’t have a response to that, so you focus on repacking your bag and swinging it over the shoulder that isn’t aching. Just as you’re turning for the door, Carlisle speaks again.

“I have five adopted children.” You stop and look over your shoulder at him, confused by the statement. “Most of them come from traumatic backgrounds,” Carlisle adds, resting his hand on the back of the chair you just vacated. “Age regression isn’t unfamiliar to me, as a response to emotional distress or physical pain. Many people experience it.” Oh god, he knows. You can feel your ears heating up from embarrassment. “It’s also an experience that can make people feel isolated, or ashamed. If you wanted to meet one of my daughters, I’ve found community can be beneficial. Of course, I don’t want to put pressure on you, but I thought it could be a positive experience. For both of you.”

He’s a good doctor and a good dad? That’s too much for one person, surely.

“I’ll. Um. I’ll think about it,” you manage. Carlisle smiles and nods, looking satisfied with that answer.

“Drive safe,” he tells you. “And put some ice on your arm tomorrow if it bothers you.”

“Thanks.” And you flee the building, barely managing a friendly nod to the secretary as you push the door open and emerge into the cloudy day. If there’s one thing Forks isn’t known for, it’s the good weather.

You dump your backpack into the passenger seat and take a second to just breathe. Okay. That was a lot. You really do feel like hiding in your room for the next century, but… Carlisle was really nice about it all. And apparently, he’s a caregiver to a regressor in his house? Or even more than one? You’ve never met a regressor in person before, despite being relatively active in the online community. It could be… interesting?

You drive back to your apartment, your eyes on the road and your mind on the offer that Carlisle made.

[anystalker707]

I'm here, love

Pairing: Ray x [fem] Reader Word count: 1 916 Genre: Comfort / Fluff Summary: Reader isn't handling it well when she goes with MCR for a tour for the first time, but Ray is always there for her. TW: Anxiety attack

Requested by anon

Tour has been going on for some time already, almost a month, but it actually feels like forever. All the agitation can be really immersive, turning the attempts of keeping track of time difficult, even more since we mostly follow a nighttime schedule due to the concerts. We’re almost always heading to a bar or club after the concerts, so it’s basically falling asleep at two in the morning to wake up at noon or something in the best days. Certainly not the best thing.

Today is thankfully one of the break days in which the guys don’t have any concert and we arrived to the next city earlier than usual, what means we’re lazing around for most of the time.

“…because he’s not here, duh!” Ray’s voice becomes audible as he leaves the bus, grinning as looking back at it and shaking his head after Mikey says something, though I’m not able to understand any of it. Only a small smile remains on his face whilst he approaches me, taking a seat on the ground with me. “Hello, love,” he says softly, pressing a kiss to my cheek.

“Hi.” I smile, pecking his lips, and put my phone down.

“What are you doing?” He raises an eyebrow, looking around for a moment like if trying to find what kept my attention until now.

“Nothing, really,” I say softly, leaning my head against his shoulder. “Do you want to go do something? I wanted to, but didn’t want to ask while you were busy with the others.” The thought of interrupting the four’s talk and probably attracting all that attention wasn’t exactly appealing, I’m secretly thankful he finally left the bus.

“Aw, you didn’t have to wait for all this time.” Ray’s eyebrows furrow lightly as he pecks my cheek. “And we could go look for a café or a restaurant, how does that sound? It’s almost lunchtime, after all.”

“Sounds good!” I smile, liking the opportunity of spending some time alone with Ray.

He seems just as happy as standing up and offering me a hand, which I take to help myself standing up. “So, how are you feeling? With the whole tour thing, I mean.” Ray wraps an arm around me when we start walking down the parking lot, concern laying under his apparently normal expression.

I hum, looking away for a moment. “Oh, yeah, I’m alright. I’ll let you know if I need anything, thank you.” I press a kiss to Ray’s cheek, trying to demonstrate my appreciation despite the subject making me tense up a bit.

Ray is more than aware of my problems with anxiety, already having helped me through its ups and downs, and both of us already predicted how the whole tour thing would interfere on it, mainly because it’s my first time tagging alone during one. We already had a hard time before the tour itself – I got too panicked at the whole thing since I barely knew how it would work –, hence he’s been worried and making sure of always checking on me.

Truth is that I’m not as alright as I’ve claimed to be. The tour has already reached my nerves and I can already feel this familiar buzzing under my skin, threatening to intensify, making me lose it yet again. It, however, won’t happen; I’ll not let that happen. Ray won’t even know.

We’re soon walking into a restaurant, the smell of food filling the ambient and, somehow, it feels good and bad at the same time. Not a surprise, since the anxiety usually has me either eating compulsively or not eating at all, so I think my body decided it’ll be better if I stay inside that bus for hours with an empty stomach, right?

We take a seat and place our orders – I balance my choice between something that my body won’t reject and Ray will not complain about, what seems to work.

“Y’know,” Ray breaks the silence between us, “what have you been thinking about watching us live?” He glances at me, expectant. His question doesn’t fail in making me smile since he’s probably referencing how I used to keep bugging him with questions about the tour concerts.

“Awesome, of course!” I grin, letting my eyes fall to my plate as I drag the food around for a bit. “It’s just amazing, I love it, seeing you playing is just…” I shrug, feeling my cheeks heat up whilst Ray breathes a chuckle, but I’m unable to look at him just yet. When I do glance at Ray, he’s grinning. “You know how much I like it.”

“I just wanted to check,” he says smugly – I snort, shaking my head playfully.

“Already regretting bringing me with you, tho?” I raise an eyebrow, finishing to eat and leaning back on the chair.

“Never!” Ray says indignantly, shooting me a look. “I’d have taken you with me before if I knew you wanted it that bad!” He pauses to take a sip of his drink. “Like, I missed you an awful lot and the tours tend to be fun. Though there are a few problems, but…”

“Yeah, I’ve noticed.” I press my lips together and nod as he does the same.

We sit in silence for a moment, only until Ray finishes eating and soon calls the waitress. She grins as coming closer, a block of notes in her hand and a pencil on the other. “Well, you two have ordered for…” she trails off, mumbling under her breath as scribbling a few things down on her paper before grinning and handing Ray the bill; he nods, reaching for his wallet. Meanwhile, the woman looks at me, wide eyes looking at me from up to down with that fake excitement. Okay. What’s wrong? Maybe she’d judging my clothes? Or that I’m with Ray?

I try to ignore the woman, turning to Ray. “Hey, I was thinking we could—”

“Keep the change,” Ray tells the woman as handing her the money, ignoring me. Fuck. “And do you know any convenience store or café nearby?”

The two engage into a conversation and maybe it’s the instability and stress due to the whole tour-anxiety thing or whatever, but I can feel my heart heavy due to it. My plan is to continue there, of course, leave with Ray so we can spend mor time alone with each other, a plan that I give up on as soon as feeling a sting in my chest. I just stand up and leave.

Why did Ray ignore me? What did I do wrong? He got tired or annoyed, perhaps. …Or, yet, I’m just overreacting. Hell, I know Ray wouldn’t do that to be in purpose because he is usually so loving.

A sigh escapes my lips as I glance back and I really want to come back – I would, if I wasn’t so far from there already. It’s the best to just give him some random excuse later.

Holy fuck, but, honestly, everything only went downhill from the moment I decided to tag along.

First of all, I panicked at the sole fact I was going to come with them to the tour then got extremely awkward during a whole week and half, barely talking with anyone asides from Ray – what got Mikey annoyed at some point, what I’m sure of even if everyone denies it. And then we went along with all the minor events, like me being the last one to get back to the bus, almost getting lost in the venue and simply being unable to talk to anyone asides from the band and the staff, among other inconveniences.

Everyone must be more than done with me, to be honest. And there’s still a whole other month before we can go home, I don’t think I’ll be able to go through all of this with the mess I am.

I sigh in relief at seeing the bus and am about to walk inside it when Gerard show ups out of seemingly nothing, looking around, but his attention quickly falls on me. “Oh, (y/n)— Hey, were you crying? Something happened?”

The question makes me freeze, just now noticing the tears threatening to slip from my eyes and consequently making me feel like all of my blood instantly drained to my feet. “I-I—” I stutter, unfortunately simply unable to finish the sentence, and end up just running away from there, going to an isolated spot of the parking lot to calm down. I don’t want anyone seeing me having another attack, make them even more annoyed and attract all that attention.

Air just escapes my grasp, seemingly impossible to continue in my lungs for longer than a few seconds whilst the tears simply do not stop, even if I don’t even want to be crying or anything, fuck off.

I take a seat on the grassed area, under a tree, and bring my hands up to my eyes.

Cleaning my mind is just impossible, I just keep thinking about how everyone is going to be shooting me these stupid concerned looks when I’m back to the bus and how I’m only going to continue being another source of stress to them during the rest of the tour. Ray should’ve just left me home as usual and—

“…(y/n), listen to me, (y/n)! I’m here!” Ray’s voice cuts through my thoughts and I can feel his hand around my wrist, the other one on my back. “Hey, baby, it’s okay. C’mon, breath with me,” he says softly before starting to set a breathing pace I can’t help but to stick to.

Hell, when did Ray even get here?

I’m getting better when my breath hitches in my throat at the thought I’m only annoying him and I can’t help but to let out a weak sob his time. Ray only starts to rub my back. Even if I’m crying, I do feel better than I did earlier, now slowly becoming more aware of my surroundings while all that filled my mind moments ago were these awful thoughts along with all the panic and worry.

“I’m so sorry,” I whisper shakily, bringing my hands down to bury my face in the crook of his neck, trying to synch my breathing with his.

“You don’t need to be sorry, love,” Ray says softly, thumb running along the back of my neck in a weirdly soothing manner. “Don’t be ashamed of it or anything, this whole thing is really stressing. Even us had problems with it at first, so everyone understands how you must be feeling.” His voice helps me calming down, giving me something to hold onto to keep myself in reality asides from his touches.

“Thank you, then,” I reply, my voice still tight.

“It’s okay. I do it because I love you.” Ray pulls away lightly and smiles at me. His hands cup my cheeks, warm against them, whereas he wipes my tears away with his thumbs. “And I want to see you fine, okay?” He presses his lips against mine in a light kiss I’m thankful for. “Let me know about it the next time you feel like this, please.” A quiet sigh comes from him as he furrows his eyebrows at me, worry obvious there. “Are you feeling better now?” I nod. “Really?” he asks and I nod again, pecking his lips like if to prove it. “Okay…-“ he smiles, relieved, “-…how about a coffee now, hm?”

[ephemerlskies]

constant craving 04 (final) | jjk

⇢ pairing: jungkook x reader

⇢ genre: “drabble” series, best friends to lovers au, slight angst, FLUFF, bestfriend!au, unrequited love, smarter idiots but still idiots all the same

⇢ word count: 6.8k

⇢ warnings: explicit language, mentions of alcohol, excessive drinking (drink responsibly), pining, jungkook is an overdramatic baby, a surplus of feelings (i am disgusted with myself), one (1) fire hazard

⇢ summary: with the Friendiversary approaching quickly, both you and Jungkook have an array of trials to navigate through. and, as Seokjin gets caught in the crossfires, you must finally make a decision that will define how the rest of your life will unfold. 

♪ playlist: constant craving - k.d. lang, bad religion - frank ocean, misunderstood - lucky daye, neu roses - daniel caesar ♪

╰ series index: 01 | 02 | 03 | 04 (final)

a/n: wow.... so bitches really call this a drabble series then write a 6 thousand word finale... its me im bitches... anywho, i really love the way this played out!! jungkook had to hit the bottom to start rising to the top and it shows. also, the ending is like....... hehe well ill just let you all see for yourselves. enjoy my lovely readers! this wrapped up such a heartfelt series that is so dear to my heart. thank you all for the support for this! and i might whip up a few drabbles simply because i think this relationship is really cute hehe ok... happy reading! <3

part four: i love you too

Carrying that music box in his pocket felt like a well-deserved and all too grim reminder of what went down a few days ago. Sitting drunk yet again, though one would best describe Jungkook’s posture as more of a sloven pile of flesh and bones withering away on a bar stool, he searched for the wallet which was in one of his four pockets.

He reached for the wrong one. Instead of the faux leather skimming his skin, it was a solid wood corner pricking the pad of his index finger. It stung more than it should have. Perhaps he'd gotten a splinter, or the top layer of his skin was simply too raw from all the wear and tear of your fight. Jungkook wasn’t one to jump at such negligible shocks, but it sank him back into that night. It wasn't the wooden corner at all.

You loved him. You still love him.

That's what you said. That's what nearly put him on the floor instead of in his chair, and what had been preying on his mind as if he were no different than a helpless animal drowning his regrets in whiskey. And he knew he should have said it back. 

Jungkook theorized ways to defy the cruel restraints of time, and if the universe would be so kind as to allow him to travel back to that day in middle school when he happened upon a scared, flush-faced student running so fast and panicked that they bumped into each other, just to be the one who said 'I love you' first. Or those genies and shooting stars and blessed fountains that supposedly granted wishes; he would pay no hesitation to plead with whatever deity would listen and permit his most prioritized desire. 

The retrospective bargaining remained a ghost haunting just about every waking moment of his life. Though, he had not been quite sure if said ghost was some cosmic sent presence or simply his own guilt. If regret took on physical ramifications, then Jungkook would have been convinced that was why he felt as if his legs wouldn't have been able to carry him even if he tried.

If I could just go back to that night with the knowledge I know now, I would have hauled my ass to your house instead of that club and told you that my choice was made for me the moment I met you. Every other person I ended up with these past twelve years was simply a buffer for loving you. I had to prepare myself, because loving you was something entirely too tremendous for a boy still grappling with his own faulty speech pattern to assume.

I wish you knew that. I wish I didn’t stand there like an idiot and let you leave, thinking me some hero for finally letting this new guy Seokjin take the place I had always imagined being in. I wish I had just said that I love you.

I love you.

I love you, ___.

Jungkook’s vision resembled that of a smudged lens. However, there were no fingerprints on his eyes. The world had turned blurry and colorless, the latter he knew was not due to the sixth order of whiskey he let soak into his heart’s open wound. 

A life of color was one of the many things that left when you did.

He didn’t know it then, but Jungkook was being fervently dramatic since it had not been more than seventy-two hours the last time he spoke to you. Thought to him, it was akin to being just short of death and taking another breath would have been an expense he wasn’t sufficiently funded to pay. 

Whatever happened in the interim of him paying his tab and walking out onto the sidewalk must have landed somewhere in the blacked out stretches of his inebriated memory, since he was now staring at your contact gleaming on his phone bearing the semblance of one guardian angel.

It was so ingrained into his routine. Opening the app with the phone icon, clicking the ‘recent’ tab, and finding your name no further than three contacts down the list because he called you as if he had important things to tell you, though normally it was just to hear your voice or to tell you about what he had for lunch. And it nestled into his muscle memory as natural as it was for him to breathe or blink. Even when alcohol debilitated his driving, walking, and thinking, his body was drawn to seek a haven such as yourself. And he nearly pressed ‘call’.

Before the comfort of your voice could ring through to his phone, reality descended upon that reflex. Right now, you were probably with Seokjin, attending some pretentious art gallery for one of his colleagues.

It was just Jungkook and the night sky and the moon that he hoped you were gazing at too; it would be the only connection to you as of now. The moon, a parcel for the most longing gazes.

There are stories where the two protagonists get it right. This was not that story. That reality stung more than the residual burn of whiskey clinging along his throat.

Both you and Jungkook made every wrong decision possible. From the moment you subjected yourself to exploiting the veneer of being a ‘good friend’ to disguise any true feelings that might have taken light, to the moment Jungkook was presented with all the excruciatingly obvious signs that you were in love with him, but was simply too inept to notice, to the both of you neglecting any urge threatening the bounds of platonic. Any path that would have steered to a destination where you two would get that happy ending was conveniently untaken.

And you had a long journey riddled with heartbreak after heartbreak to prove it.

He traded his phone with that wooden music box, scuffing the soles of his shoe as he walked back home, hoping he’d be able to give the gift to you on your Friendiversary.

-----

Your pain was still raw. In this way, you had not considered, or rather avoided the idea of tending to such delicate wounds. The days leading up to the infamous anniversary had been spent hoping you would organically heal enough to allow the presence of Jungkook while denying another reopening in your wound.

You had been juggling a not so thrilling number of conflicts the three days preceding that self-acclaimed national holiday.

One, Seokjin and his bottomless supply of invitations that you felt too obligated to refuse. He had such a life packed with plans which is more than you could have said for Jungkook. He, most likely, busied himself with promoting ranks in some obscenely violent video game. Two, a mutual friend of yours had told you Seokjin was fixing to make your relationship official this coming Friday, and you didn’t want to admit the lackluster reaction upon hearing the news was equivalent to receiving a C on a test. It wasn't the worst grade to receive, but you knew there would always be something better than adequacy. Not satisfying enough nor disappointing enough to be dealt with without bending a few expectations. And three, all you really wanted, the only agent of excitability (both good and bad) that diluted the festering numbness in your heart just a tad more, was thinking about seeing Jungkook on your Friendiversary.

But with that excitement, was its equally worrying constituent: whether or not you would be able see Jungkook that day without cracking under pressure.

Things weren’t exactly attuned between the two of you. Your emotional stature had never been more unsynchronized and offkey with Jungkook’s, so, forcing a celebratory movie or dinner would be no different than adding cornstarch to the already thick tension.

“___? Are you listening?” Everything Seokjin had just been droning on about filtered in and out without a single word being absorbed, and you could have pretended this wasn't the case but  stress had apprehended caring enough to lie.

“Sorry… No, I wasn't. I’m just stressed is all.” Since that was only a half lie, self-admonition had not yet taken permanent residency whenever you would look at Seokjin’s eyes offering nothing but genuine tact.

“Oh, sorry to hear! Are you okay? Anything you wanna talk about?” That, and the soft press of his hand over yours had swallowed you into a perpetual, guilty cycle of comparing two incomparable people.

Seokjin was always like this. Serving a gentle smile and honest ears as a vessel of calmness during whatever calamity you were grappling. It was safe knowing if you fell, you’d have a comfortable cushion to soften the impact. He was mindful with his words and had the intelligence to articulate them with impressive eloquence. You were more likely to see pigs fly than to see him stutter. He had a diverse group of friends and walked a steady path to a financially secure life. And you started to wonder what else one would need in a partner? Any sensible person would do much more than you had to snag someone like Seokjin, as handsome as he was kind and respectful. He seemed to have everything Jungkook lacked, including mutual feelings for you.

It would have been entirely too easy to pick him, as if there was a ‘Seokjin’ button and a ‘Jungkook’ button and you could press Seokjin’s on a whim. If choosing him would have meant miraculous nullification of all your very real and very unremitting feelings for that idiot you called your best friend, then you would have done it in a heartbeat.

There wasn't a 'Seokjin' button or a 'Jungkook' button, nor was there a button that would wondrously redistribute your feelings towards Seokjin.

And then there was Jungkook. Always in the back of your mind when he wasn't tenanting the focus of it.

He was never predictable in the ways that mattered. It was just as difficult figuring out his next move as figuring out whether this trait was exciting or exhausting.

Though, this had not been to say you didn’t know him well; in fact, all his habits and preferences and pet peeves could be bound into a book, written by you, and it would be so accurate anyone who read it would think it was an autobiography. He knew you to the same caliber. Where Seokjin would ask what was wrong, Jungkook wouldn’t need to. He already learned your behavior to know to say something along the lines of ‘tell me what’s wrong when you're ready, we can watch your favorite movie or swing by that Chinese place with those great fried dumplings in the meantime’. And on more favorable occasions, he'd say nothing and simply wrap you in his arms and let his shirt become a delta for your tears.

To anyone else, that might sound entirely too frank and perhaps a bit dismissive to be comforting, but to you it was the exact cure for each affliction. To never need explanations that would validate your feelings because Jungkook saw to that right when he took notice; to never manufacture fake smiles through failed attempts at cheering you up since, of course, he knew exactly what to do to vegetate joy in your heart and earn a smile from years and years —and years— of practice. It had almost driven you mad, thinking about how he knew from a shift in your brow what you were feeling and yet, somehow, never realized how deeply in love you were.

All the while, the moment you were convinced you had been versed fluently in his every move, he would pawn another blindsight that would leave you breathless and amazed all the same. Jungkook always had concealed tricks up his sleeve, and life was anything but repetitive with him. You would more often than not find yourself struggling to relearn language and existing itself just to keep up with him. How exactly he managed to wield such diametric facets of being was an enigma beyond the reasoning of this universe.To feel like home, somewhere you belonged outside of your own body, and a daring voyage into a completely new world all at once must have meant he was some sort of Godsend. Only angels could have sculpted a soul so magnetizing, you assumed.

Seokjin was an umbrella, shielding you on some arcane journey under an unforgiving rainfall. Your shoes kept dry and your hair intact.

And if he was the umbrella, then Jungkook was the rain. Falling everywhere and all at once, so that you couldn't help but let yourself be saturated in his entire, vibrant being. And who’s to say letting such a water fall against your skin was a bad thing? Sometimes rain is cleaning, gentle even. They bear fruits as beautiful as rainbows that guide you to an unnamed treasure.

Your treasure, however, had a name.

Jungkook calling.

"___? Hello? You in there?" Seokjin waved his hand in front of your face mostly in a jesting manner, but part of him felt like your eyes were blinded by something held in your heart. If he hadn’t pulled you back into reality, you might have been lost forever.

“I'm just…” Your attention had abandoned this conversation the second his name gave light to your screen. “Sorry, um…”

“It's okay, you can take the call. I’ll be in the kitchen making us some coffee.”

If you were to thank him profusely, it would have been far too obvious how much you missed seeing his name among your notifications, and most likely expose how often you spent thinking of Jungkook while you were supposed to be enthralled with Seokjin. So, you just nodded and answered the phone.

Nodding and answering, as though that didn't feel like taking a breath of clean air after hours of swimming through muddied waters.

“Hello? ___?”

“Jungkook.” It took you longer than usual to form a response and what was assembled had been a half-baked utterance just to let him know you were on the other side of the phone, hearing his voice and feeling a surge of energy course through your veins like he was some delicious narcotic filling life into you after only a week without him.

“___.” Jungkook was in his own debt of words as well. The exchange halted for a few seconds, a jaded breathing cutting the cracked static.

“Look-”

“Hey so-”

Any hope that you had finally caught up to the same page as Jungkook was lost. Now, it seemed you two were reading entirely different books.

“You go.” You said after another dreadful pause. He was the one who called, so he should be the one carrying the burden of navigating through this deafening tension.

“Well, I- uh… I… Well, you see I was just, um, wondering…” Jungkook’s heart must have shut off. That would explain why even the most rudimentary of words felt closer to a foreign language. Or, why he was making conscious efforts to counteract the threat of his nearly dormant lisp.

His brain was drained dry of any blood, his inner mechanisms were shutting down. Even without the alcoholic filter catching words and common sense in its web, Jungkook felt himself fall into an overactive state of dumbfoundedness. Sobriety only a cataract for his emotional override. 

“Our friendiversary?”

“I’m sorry, I did not understand literally anything you just said.”

“Me neither.”

The charming and familiar laugh that spilled through the speaker reminded you that Jungkook was in fact a real person. Not some figmented embodiment of every lost and unrequited and tortuous feeling you had been suppressing for twelve years. Jungkook was real, his laugh and everything else you loved about him were all so incredibly real. And more importantly, the pure joy you felt was real; a permanent serialization of his. Your smiles and his smiles had always surfaced in tandem.

Now, you both were laughing. Neither were warranted by his messy attempt at forming a coherent sentence. The weight of discomfort shedding from your shoulders had been partnered with a slew of relieved chuckles.

“Anyway, um. I- I still wanna see you on our Friendiversary. Or, at least give you your gift.” Admitting that was terrifying but the thought of breaking the consecutive streak of eleven years simply because he was too much of a coward to admit he wanted to see you dizzied him. However, the thought of spending your friendiversary alone terrified him beyond comprehension. So, he thought not about that as a possibility; he carved an opening to his heart in hope you wouldn’t send sharp thorns of rejection into it.

“Yeah, I, uh. I still wanna see you too. I mean, it is a national holiday. We gotta have holiday spirit, right?” You were forcing playful banter, it felt like lemon juice scouring cuts on your tongue, but you were so desperate to make things between you two feel normal.

“You’re right! So, um… You can come over tomorrow night. I’ll set up a surprise or whatever.” He seemed to have fallen back into stride with pre-confession Jungkook. Trying to keep up with him now would just exhaust you of all your means, so you chose to save the rest for tomorrow night. Even if that meant watching him walk away to some unforeseeable finish line; his back, the last part of him you’d see until you could finally collect your broken pieces and start walking as well.

“Sounds good! I’ll, um, see you then.”

“See you, ___.”

You had no idea, and how could you, that Jungkook was now wiping small clusters of wetness from the bed of his eyelids. Why he thought you, the one person that remained a constant in his life, would say no to him over one fight (of many) made for quite the spill of tears. But if you did know, you would have told him you felt like crying too.

"Hey! How did everything go?" You were so immersed in your virtual conversation with Jungkook you nearly forgot the person you were presently with. The train of guilt wouldn't stop for your pathetic attempts at disembarking.

"Oh! Thanks for the coffee." You sipped, and it had just been a stall to blink away the tears that were straying beyond your will of concealment. "It went good. We're still celebrating our Friendiversary."

"Friendiversary?" Seokjin's light chuckle veiled his tense concern.

"Yeah... Uh, it's just this thing we do to celebrate our friendship. The day we met."

"Oh... that's..." His eyes were scaling the rim of his mug.

"That's what, Seokjin?" You were stern, knowing well enough it was born of far more than platonic defensiveness. And you had no right to be the one prosecuting him since you clearly had more to hide than meets the eye.

"I mean, it's just interesting how dedicated you are to an anniversary with a friend." Seokjin wielded that soft-spoken voice which made it difficult to be anything but patient with him. And from the tone of it, he seemed to have no ill intentions with that statement, though it had not been an entirely innocent observation. To you, however, it felt like he might as well have set you on fire.

"Interesting? What is that supposed to even mean? I mean, we've been friends for twelve years. I- I don't know why people are always so judgmental." Your arms crossed over your chest, hoping he would take notice how much his comment slighted you. If asked, you would have insisted you would have been this worked up over any of your friends. Though you knew well enough this was untrue, and it made you feel even worse acting as though Seokjin was the one at fault here.

"I'm sorry. I'm not judging you, really. I just... I just have never heard of two friends doing something like that so religiously."

You sighed out all your anger, knowing the way you snapped at him was merely misdirected frustration. "No, I'm sorry. I know it's kinda weird."

"Look, I get it. You guys are close. But, ___, you talk about him so much that half, no, over half of your stories include him. We've been dating for, what, barely a week now, and I know more about this Jungkook guy than I know about you, and I haven't even met him."

Lips parted, ready to dispatch another slew of defenses to refute all the things he said. It was more disappointing than it was shocking to find nothing but a long sigh emerging. Because he was right. Jungkook has been interwoven so thoroughly in your last twelve years that if you only told the stories without him in it, then it would be the least accurate and nondescript retelling of your life. Fragments of an unfinished novel. It would miss the most crucial pieces, entire chapters, of your story.

You would have been presenting a shell of you, hollow and one dimensional. All the inner parts of you, the lungs and veins and tissue that gave you life and made you whole belonged solely with Jungkook.

That's why you sat there, blank faced, foolishly waiting for the words that wouldn't come to your aid because you had no place to contend with him.

"Seokjin... I'm with you..." It's all that would come up your throat, and it felt like acid. You were sure it burned his ears when he heard them more than it had your throat.

It hadn’t even been partially true. Physically you were with him, but in your head you were sitting on your couch with Jungkook, consuming a concerning amount of junk food while chatting through a movie used more as background noise than entertainment.

"Okay. Does that mean you don't have feelings for him?"

"Well..."

"Can you confidently say you could replace all the time you spend with him with time you would spend with me?" Seokjin must have noticed your returning tears because he loosened his verbal grip from your throat. To you, it sounded like he was pacifying you for some horrible sin, to anyone else it sounded as though he was simply trying to dredge up feelings that would disrupt the chance of a relationship between you and him. "___, I like you. I really do, but in all honesty, I'm looking for something serious. I think we would be great together, but only if you don't have any feelings left for him."

"Seokjin..." You regretted looking at him.

Sweetness was strewn in his eyes and gentle smile. Seokjin was softer than cotton, which made the real threat, the rough sandpaper wearing away skin and bones, you. It made it all the more painful to know you had been keeping everything you felt for Jungkook hidden from Seokjin. Though, if one would have presented an objective point of view, your feelings were far from secretive. And the most brutal honesty was that you knew feelings for Seokjin were never in your attainability. Not the way they always had been for Jungkook.

He was the wrong person who crossed paths with you at the right moment. A mere convenience. And you knew he deserved much more than what you had to offer.

"And maybe I'm being an idiot, but I like you too much to give you some ultimatum which would put you in such an unfair position. So, I'll let you think this over." His compassion felt more like a sharp blow to your chest. “No pressure.”

If he hadn’t smiled like he did, then you would have broken up with him right then and there. It was not possible to rip away such tender hope away from a smile so sweet.

"I'm sorry." You meant the remorse behind those words and it still hadn’t amounted to a proper consolation. "I'm sorry. I guess... I guess I'll go... Seokjin?”

“Yes?” He replied quickly, and you knew only a pace that rapid was one brought on by a sliver of faith that you might have made your decision right then.

“You’re a really great person. You deserve the world.”

Unfortunately, you couldn’t give him what he wanted. And as bitter and unkind as that might have felt at the moment, it was the only bit of truth and relent you could have offered him.

-----

In your bed, sleep became somewhat of an abstract desire. You knew your rest was deprived from you when the digital clock on your bedside told you it was six hours past the time you'd normally fall asleep. It was because you really did have a choice to make now.

To choose Seokjin, and know you'd collapse in the safety of his reciprocated affection, though haunted by how you would never feel the fullest extent of content. And you would live with that until resentment and distance wedged irreversible damage in your relationship.

Or, to choose Jungkook, which would catapult you into a depth so dark and tenuous that you would have no idea whether you'd meet gentle snow or hard, deadly concrete when you landed. And maybe you'd never land at all; maybe you would be caught in a state of falling down and down forever, until your beating heart eventually stilled.

Which one was worth it? Which were you willing to risk? These were the questions that kept you awake.

The hours leading to your undisclosed celebration events with Jungkook ceased being actual points of your existence and merely obstructions that you had to plow through in order to arrive at some conclusive moment. Something that might give you an answer to all your questions. Something that might have released you from devotedly checking your phone for a Jungkook patented text or call.

You were turning into a half-being. Someone who could only inhale a full breath, laugh an intentional laugh, and sleep a soundless sleep when their other half was there.

If you thought being in love with Jungkook for your entire friendship was pathetic, then you couldn’t fathom what you had become now.

Standing in front of his door, the same one you lugged him to that night he was too drunk to balance on his feet, when you willingly carried all the weight he couldn’t, when your lips became acquainted and comfortable with his within half a beat, you felt as if this chunk of wood was mocking you. A partition barricading you from Jungkook. Your Jungkook. The man you always felt you were on the outskirts of, with only a window to peer into his unreadable mind. And that was enough for you ―until now.

Now you were going to knock on that door with your hand, make him open it for you, and walk into his home. You would be the one to step foot inside of the very structure that only solicited closed doors and immovable walls and fogged windows. And you would leave behind your timidity, every feeling and urge that left you with disappointing compromises for the sake of maintaining this friendship.

You would be selfish, and he would finally feel a mere glimpse of what you have always felt for the best and worst of your life.

Even when he opened the door, arming a smile that actively disarmed you, this home of his was yours to conquer. This was your time to act for you alone, despite how many smiles he sent your way. You had not any weapons or shields or an infantry for a clutch. You just had your heart and all the love it carried. 

“Hey! ___, you look… You look great.” There was no real incentive for him to censor how he truly thought you looked. Immeasurably beautiful. It was simply his own nerves impeding on the feelings that were too intense to express without it being followed by an entire soliloquy of I love you’s.

“Thanks... You too...” You could almost feel the words brimming in your and Jungkook’s mouth, carrying such raw emotions and longing intentions.

"I'm really glad that- Jungkook..." Walking into his house punctuated what you were about to say.

His living room was strewn with enough candles to steal the last of your words and to consider his house a fire hazard. That didn't negate this lovely sea of lights to be anything but romantic and thoughtful. A bit cluttered, and not at all perfect, but it must have taken Jungkook hours to set up every wax column. The thoughtfulness of this gesture would have astonished you had it not been for the consistency of Jungkook snatching your breath and words away whenever he tried. It was antithetical, the way you expected his surprises. Yet, always surprised all the same.

Unpredictable, completely surrounding you just like the rain.

"I had to turn off my fire detector but... Worth it." Jungkook considered the number of mishaps that could have dampened any chance of this being romantic.

A candle could tip over and set his entire place ablaze, the wax could leak onto his carpet and tabletops, damaging his furniture and savings for replacements, you and he could have suffocated from all the fumes steaming from the wick. But if that look on your face didn't feel like the only bit of revival to keep his heart's steady beating, if your eyes didn’t look as though it was the only set of eyes that shed beauty into this world then he wouldn't have used up exactly three lighters to pull this stunt. But it did, and he felt warmth and color return to every inch of his body.

He would have used hundreds of lighters to ignite thousands of candles if that meant an ounce of happiness from you. He wanted to say that, but he knew the candles said it for him.

The spectacle almost made you forget why you were here in the first place. It almost made you forget the resolve you managed to gather before entering. And then he said your name.

"___."

The letters flowing from his lips as if they could only be pronounced by his tongue. It sounded so good. So good, that if anyone else were to say it then it wouldn't have been your name at all. It would have sounded wrong, sullied. And it wasn't supplied by neat articulation, this new belonging of your name in his mouth. The need for him to sculpt your name into this world was more than that. "I will never forgive myself if I don't get this out while I still can."

"Jungkook, what is all this?" You didn't know why you felt a collection of tears brimming along your eyes, but you didn't care to figure it out. Perhaps you felt an influx of feelings, an abundance too heavy for your body to seal within the confines of your emotional seams, so they overflowed in the form of tears. This certainly had not been the first time you cried over Jungkook, but you had never cried over him like this.

"___, I love you!" Jungkook said loudly. It was just you and him who could hear, but it felt as though he wanted the entire world to know.

"What? I- You- What?" Your lack of verbal poise was indicative of your love for him once again taking the reins of your mind and heart. Words were a luxury you couldn't afford as of now. You just had to feel everything you were feeling until the rainstorm settled. The hope that he would spare you some remnants of fluency was far along, and you weren't too sure if what Jungkook was about to say would be gentle enough to leave you with any words at all.

"I love you. I don't know why I didn't know it sooner. Or maybe, I- Maybe I did know?" Jungkook sighed at his own ineloquence. "I'm stupid! That's it. That's my only excuse. I'm so stupid. The way I felt about you, the way I still feel about you, is something I thought all best friends had. I thought everyone felt like the moments they weren't spending with their best friends just felt like filler moments. Like, every day I spent without you was just a span of time I had to wait out until I see you again. Like every damn moment of my life is spent waiting for you. And if I don't end up with you then... then I'll never stop waiting."

"Jungkook, I-" He prevailed in surprising you, taking words and breath and thoughts all at once.

"And, I'm that stupid! I really thought all best friends had those moments when they stare at you, and- and-" Now, you weren't the only one with wet eyes and cheeks. "And I just feel like looking at you and being with you just makes me better. It makes me a better person, or something, and it makes me feel like... Like I'll never get hurt again. And even if I do get hurt, I know it's you I want to be there. I know that whenever something bad happens to you, or when you feel like crying or when you're happy or angry or anything that I want to be the one who gets to be by your side. When I look at you, all I want is to love you. To love all your pain away."

"You really mean that?"

"Yes! God, I love you." You didn't notice how it happened, but Jungkook's arms became a shield around you. Inside his arms you were indestructible. Your hands pressed against his cheeks, memorizing the plush, smooth skin. The world could hurl all the fire and ice it had, but it wouldn’t matter. "___, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry it took me so long to figure it out. I'm sorry that in that period, I hurt you. Please, forgive me. I love you, and I want to be with you."

"Of course, I forgive you. I... I can't believe this." Hearing everything you always wanted from him was drastically different when it was actually unfolding. It was a million times more than any hope or dream you used as a salve for your longing. It was everything.

"Maybe it took so long because I was afraid. Because the idea of loving you was something I wasn't ready for. Even though I did love you, God, who was I to take on something as fragile and crucial as loving you. I know I probably would have messed it up. And, fuck, maybe I'm messing it up right now. But I just needed it to be perfect. I needed loving you to be perfect because I don't want to give you anything less than that."

"You were always enough for me, Jungkook. More than enough. You were and are everything to me" His arms that pressed you further into him expressed how happy that made him. 

"But I'm not perfect yet. I might mess up... A lot. No, I'll definitely mess up. I don't know if I can offer you perfect yet. But I do know that through everything I have never stopped loving you and I will never stop loving you."

"Jungkook... I don't know what to say." Your thumb grazed a falling tear from his face. Jungkook had not cried often in front of you; and you could tally up the amount of times he had on your fingers alone. But when he did, it was still as beautiful as when he was smiling or laughing or even scowling.

"You could say you love me back." You did. You loved him, his smile that was currently on a mission to melt your heart, his arms that carried both the good and bad parts of you, his wit that you always relished in. All the reasons to love him were an endless flowing river. If you were lucky enough, you would catch a glimpse of each beautiful current and be able to give name to the gravity that pulled you into him.

"I love you too, you idiot." The last word caught in your throat because your lips were being kissed instead.

His lips. Warm and exciting, allotting your being with an infinite devotion of his. And it was more than you could have ever hoped for.

It felt like fire. Like a grove of candles encapsulating the origin of heat. You and Jungkook, holding each other so close, you could have become one. Hot and all-consuming of anything in its path. If one stood too close, they would suffer scorching embers that stray from the orange pyres. Seokjin, Irene, and any other unassuming casualty that had the misfortune of stepping between the two of you, harboring the burn scars to remind them of what fumed from their interference.

Every element concocting between you and him was that of a bright flame, cremating pure metals and wet woods and thick forests alike.

You were in his home. His arms and lips and hands told you it was your home as well. All that time spent wondering why you could never slip inside before was never because he didn't want to let you in. And the thing is, you never thought to knock until now. You sat outside in a silenced hope that he would voluntarily open that door for you. But unknown to you, Jungkook seemed to be waiting as well. Waiting in a large room with empty spaces where you belonged and where he kept reserved for your residence alone.

He waited even when he wasn't quite sure of who he was waiting for, or if you would ever actually spill your warmth into his home. He waited until his fingers turned to ice and his eyes fell to exhaustion, for you to walk inside.

"So, you're like my boyfriend now?" Your voice brushed against his smiling lips.

"Yeah, your boyfriend, or whatever."

"You know this means you have to top next year's friendiversary. And I mean, all these candles? That's gonna be tough." It could have counted as sensory overload, the feeling of his palms flush against your back, the tip of his nose grazing yours, the bright array of candles illuminating the room. But you were so, incredibly cold without him that this felt like solace to you.

"When have I ever disappointed you?" Jungkook regretted what came out of his mouth too late to stop himself from saying it.

"Oh, I couldn't count the amount of times on my fingers alone! What about that time you forgot our chains for the tires on our trip to the mountains? We almost died." His eye roll only encouraged you to continue. Maybe, if you were lucky, he'd equip that cute pout whenever he wanted his way. "Or what about when you swore you brought water, but three miles in on our hike you had that look on your face. You know I reminded you to get water and you swore you did. Or what about-"

"Okay! I get it! I fuck up, jeez." He scrunched his nose, his eyes waning into crescents courtesy of that grin of his. You counted the number of wrinkles along the bridge of his nose as you always did, though you had acquired an expertise in the geography of his face. Each line and angle and ridge were now and eternally yours to restudy and marvel. "Hey, uh, almost forgot."

He reached into his front left pocket. "I, um, kept carrying it around thinking I'd see you somewhere. Kinda dumb right?"

"Not dumb." You opened the tiny box, wound the handle until the spring felt tight and you could see the throngs prick the textured wheel, and it was one of those moments where you didn't see a gift in your hand. You simply saw his thought and sentiment manifested as a box of wood that sung a tune.

All the things Jungkook wanted to give you, the sun and the moon and the entire universe were not his to give. So for now, he settled for this music box and there would be a day when he would collect each celestial being and place them right into your hands. Maybe then, he would feel less of a debt for possessing such a love like yours.

"This is... I love it. Thank you, Jungkook." You smiled, but it was motivated in the hopes he would smile back. You thought he deserved that much, at least. And he did.

"Sooooo... Can I tell Seokjin that you're actually in love with me and that he sucks ba-"

"Um, absolutely not!" As always, his crudeness and slight inability to remain mature for too long only wedged you deeper in love.

So, terribly in love. Your state of constant craving for Jeon Jungkook had been left barren. That desolate, solitary province was no longer yours to take residence in.

You had a home now. And you had no need to crave Jungkook anymore. He was right here, holding you.

“I love you.” 

“I love you too.”

a/n: okay, cry with me.... these two.... such hopeless saps for each other i'm here for it. final destination is simp city... also (spoiler) it is completely canon that irene and seokjin bond over their mutual heartbreaks and get to smitten hehehe. anyway, my loves i hope you enjoyed this finale as much as i enjoyed writing it!!! it was a short but heartfelt journey with these two and i will miss their idiocy sm. thank u for your endless support i love u all!!! <3

[tacticaldiary]

Blame it on the Rain

Pairing: Reader x Tetsurou Kuroo

Genre: Fluff, tiny bit of Angst

When the rain spoils their picnic, Y/N is determined to spend time with Kuroo, even if it means walking to his house alone at night. What she didn’t plan on was being saved and tickled half to death by her dork of a boyfriend.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

"Tetsu, calm down." Y/N rolls her eyes and closes the blinds to her room, blocking out the gloomy rain outside. The curtain did nothing to block out the pitter patter of the water and under normal circumstances, she would enjoy the peaceful, rhythmic sounds. This, however, was not a normal circumstance. This was the same rain that had ruined their long-awaited picnic plans.

The same rain that is currently forcing her to deal with a sulky Kuroo over the phone.

"I had a whole thing planned. You would've totally fallen for me."

"….We've been dating for three years."

"Not the point."

Y/N sighs, sitting at the edge of her bed. She had really been looking forward to the picnic as well. Both of them had been unbelievably busy this week. The outing was supposed to let them de-stress. Picking at the corner of her sheets, her gaze drifts to the covered window again. It was night-time. She just wanted to spend time with her boyfriend, was that too much to ask?

Struck with the sudden urge to see him, she sits up. She had been tuning his sulky voice out for the past few minutes.

"I'm coming over."

There's a second of surprised silence from the other end.

"In the rain? I know you're eager to see me, kitten, but you'll get sick."

"Ever heard of an umbrella" she rolls her eyes, already gathering her keys and wallet. "We can have a movie night. Maybe you'll stop sulking then."

"I do not sulk."

"Sure."

"I don't!"

"Mhm. See you in 15 minutes." She shuts her front door and shivers a little as the cold hits her.

You can't watch a movie without snacks. That was Y/N excuse to the two bags of food she had in her hand. She had stopped by a convenience store on the way, and although the bags, heavy with treats, made her feel excited, she couldn't help but shake the feeling that she was being watched. It had started when she had left the store.

She stops at a nearby bench and pretends to redo her shoelaces, glancing around discreetly. As she had expected, Y/N catches someone slip into a nearby alleyway and out of sight. Fear grips her in a tight vice and she quickly gathers her things and starts walking again.

Kuroo wasn't far now. She reassures herself, thinking about how he would gather her up in a warm hug, like he usually did.

Then the footsteps behind her get heavier and quicker. Clenching her jaw she comes to a dead stop and turns around. Not seeing anyone, she yells.

"Why the hell are you following me?"

There's no response.

"You're a fucking coward. What do you want?"

After a few seconds, she hears shuffling, and a man appears out from a nearby shadowed alley. He's grinning in a way that means trouble.

"What's a pretty thing like you doing walking all alone. It's rather dangerous at this time." He moves closer to her, till he's about an arm length away. Y/N refuses to back down. She wouldn't show how scared she was.

"I'm perfectly capable of taking care of myself. I suggest you leave me alone, now." Her voice is cold.

"Aw, don't be like that. I'll walk you home, how about that?" She could tell he wouldn't take no for an answer.

Kuroo was growing steadily worried. It had been half an hour, double the time Y/N said she would be here by. He knew she couldn't be lost, she made her way to his house at least once a week.

Deciding to go and look for her, he grabs his jacket and walks off with an umbrella. He walks about 5 minutes before he sees the problem. It's a little hard to make out in the rain, but he could see his girlfriend being...confronted by another guy. She was clearly uncomfortable, and Kuroo narrows his eyes ready to intervene when the guy grabs her arm.

He stops however, when he sees Y/N kick at his knee and twisting his arm, pushing the guy away from her, sending him tumbling to the ground. A small, prideful smirk grows on his face. That was his Y/N all right.

"I told you to stay the fuck away from me." She sneers looking down at him. "Hope you're happy, getting your ass beat by a 'pretty little thing'" she mocks, before turning around to leave.

She's stopped when she feels someone yank at her ankle, and she loses her balance catching herself on her knees. She yelps as she feels her assaulters grubby fingers pull on her hair painfully.

The guys spews profanities at her and Y/N struggles, a little panicked. She should have ran away. She should have just sprinted to Kuroo’s house.

Her pain is momentary, however, as the hand in her hair vanishes and the profanities are replaced with a groan, laced with pain.

Someone else grabs her, but this time, the hands are familiar. Large, warm and calloused. Looking up, she sees her boyfriend crouching by her side, looking her over for injuries.

"Tetsu-"

"Did he hurt you anywhere else?"

She answers him with a shaky no. He was mad. She could tell by his sharp voice and clenched jaw. His eyes held fury, but not towards her. He nods and stands back up, turning to the offender.

"You usually touch girls who don't wanna be touched?" He grabs the guy by the collar, yanking him closer.

Kuroo towers over the guy, using his height and build to intimidate. It works. The guy frantically shakes his head. He glances back at Y/N, who still looks shaken up, before hissing quietly.

"The only reason you're still able to stand is because of the lady over there. You glance in her direction again, and I'll make sure you'll regret it. Got it?" He shoves the guy back to the ground after he nods fearfully, and watches him scramble away.

Kuroo immediately turns to Y/N, who hesitates for a second, before throwing herself at the boy. He catches her easily and holds her close, stroking her hair and allowing her to calm down. It takes a few minutes, but once she’s calm enough to speak, Y/N untangles himself from her and thanks him, grabbing the bags from the floor.

“I shouldn't have let you walk alone. I won’t let it happen again. Never again, you hear me?” he says gently, taking the bags from her, ignoring her protests. He grabs her hand and leads her the rest of the way.

When they get home, Kuroo makes sure the door is locked behind them. They settle onto the couch and Kuroo lets Y/N flip through the movies. Once she puts on one of her favourites, Kuroo sighs dramatically, claiming they’ve seen it a million times.

He takes her soft giggle as a win.

Kuroo then shamelessly lays back on the couch and pulls Y/N on top of him, wrapping a secure arm around her waist. She hums in contentment as the movie starts.

Kuroo’s honestly not paying attention at all. His thoughts keep drifting back to the fear he felt when that sorry excuse for a human was hurting her. He gently runs his hands through his hair, and chuckles when she practically melts against him.

“You know,” he speaks up suddenly, “You don't have to pretend to be brave around me, kitten. I can tell that shook you up pretty badly.”

She shifts so she can meet his gaze. “I know. I trust you. I’m fine now, I think.”

He hums. “I love you.” he says casually, smiling down at her.

Y/N can feel her heartbeat quicken, as it always did when he said those three magic words and looked at her adoringly like that. She pretends to think. “I think I might love you too. I’ll get back to you on that.”

“Oh really?” he says with an amused smirk.

“Yep. Maybe you should try taking me on a picnic. I’d totally fall for you then.” She mimics him on the last part, lowering her voice comically.

“I do not sound like that.” he says, stifling a laugh and rolling his eyes.

“You do.”

“Do not.”

“Do too.” She sticks out her tongue childishly.

“You leave me no choice. For the record, love, I didn’t want it to come to this.” She’s confused for a second, but her eyes widen as she feels Kuroo’s fingers graze her sides. Before she can stop him, he’s tickling her, the arm around her waist pinning her against him, preventing her from escaping.

Between bursts of giggle she tries to get him to stop, but he refuses, demanding she surrender.

“A-alright! You don’t- don’t sound like t-that!” she laughs, taking a sigh of relief when he finally stops.

“There. Was that so hard?‘ he teases.

“Shut up.” She smacks his arm lightly. “You made me miss the movie!”

“You’d rather watch a boring movie than receive my affection? I’m offended.”

“Shush!” she settles back down, the two slipping into a comfortable silence. Almost as an afterthought, Y/N says:

“I love you too.” She can practically feel him grinning, as he pecks her on the head. She’s content with knowing she has the same effect on him as he has on her.

The quickening of his heartbeat gives it away.

Requests are Open and Welcome

[horansqueen]

It Feels Like Christmas - Part 1

It feels like Christmas Just like Christmas It feels like Christmas with you...

Click Here if you want to be on the update list

MIMI

It's Christmas again. It's that time of the year again, and I couldn't find a good reason not to visit my family. It's not that I didn't love them, in fact, I loved them more than any other humans on the planet. They put up with me when I walked into their life and they loved me through all the obstacles I brought them despite myself. No one else had even showed me love the way my parents had and I was totally thankful. The problem was not a lack of love, it was the whole Christmas thing. The parties, the traditions, and all the memories that came with it... including the bad ones. No, Christmas was definitely not my favorite holiday and probably never would be.

The airport was crowded and I had to admit I was not a fan of that either, but I still managed to make my way to the counter before finding a seat. Waiting was the worst, and I closed my eyes, almost falling asleep a few times but waking up every time my head would fall. I was extremely tired because of the last few weeks at work and I just wanted to lay down in my bed, blankets over my head, and sleep for a month. The beds at my parents' were comfortable, of course, but they were not my bed and that was their only but still very big flaw.

I blinked a few times, forcing myself to open my eyes, and turned my head to look at the large window. It was barely possible to see anything except snowflakes falling and I started nibbling my bottom lip. I was normally not scared of flying but in these conditions, it was slightly stressful. I gripped the sleeves of my hoodie hard and twisted the fabric. Was that a good excuse to leave and just go back home? To spend the holidays at home, watching action movies on my couch and napping in-between?

I was still lost in my thought when a message from the airline company echoed in the large room.

"Due to the bad weather, all flights will be delayed. More information will be provided later."

Something inside of me seemed to light suddeenly like a switch was flick, as I thought of the possibility to just go back home. It seemed like I was blessed for no reason, like someone had heard my prayers and that I was going to get what I wanted this year without much effort.

I watched everyone get up and rush to the counters to talk to employes and at that moment, I was so happy I was not working there. I remained sitting without moving at all as everyone was panicking around me and closed my eyes again. I thought about how excited my mom had sounded when I told her that this year, I would spend Christmas with them and somethin stirred in my stomach. It was guilt. Of course, I had to go. It was the first time in the past 5 years that I would spend Christmas with them. I hated it, that much was true, but I could make an effort, right? It was only a few days... right? Suffering a few days to make my parents happy seemed like a very tiny sacrifice and after a while, I sighed and my eyes fluttered open.

I inhaled deeply to gather some courage and finally go get my stuff back. When I got out of the airport, it was late and although I should be hungry, I was actually slightly nauseous. I felt my heart jump in my chest and walked quickly to the closest cab, opening the door and bringing my luggage with me.

"Wow, I'm so lucky." I let out with a chuckle before I noticed someone sitting next to me. "Oh, I-I'm s-so sorry!"

The man next to me looked young, maybe a few years younger than me, and he seemed as surprised as I was. I could see part of his brown hair under his beanie and when his blue eyes met mine, I held my breath.

"Sorry miss, but he was here before you-"

"No, no of course, I'm really sorry." I grabbed the handle of the door but stopped immediately when I felt the young man's hand over mine. It was warm despite the cold weather and I turned around to face him, blinking a few times.

"Where are you going?"

My mom taught me not to share that kind of information with anyone but I just licked my lips and raised a shoulder. "Closest hotel, I guess."

His lips curled slightly and he nodded once. "Me too. We can share the cab if you want."

I didn't want to get back in the cold with my stuff and try to find a new cab. I just wanted to get in bed and sleep after a drink or two, perhaps. I let my eyes roam on his face before I pressed my lips together. A cab ride wouldn't kill me. In fact, there was probably a hotel nearby and we would just split the bill and party without ever seeing each other again.

"Thank you, that's very sweet of you." I agreed, my lips curling into a smile.

"Christmas spirit!" he chuckled and shrugged. "It's the most wonderful time of the year!"

"I guess." I replied softly. I thought the exact opposite but what was the point of telling him? Besides, I knew it would bring many questions that I didn't want to answer.

The ride was silent but I noticed him glancing at me from time to time and every time, I couldn't help my heart from skipping a beat. We reached the hotel and paid the driver before bringing our stuff in the hall of the hotel slowly. He seemed tired too but when we reached the counter, I leaned against it without sending him a second glance.

"I'd like a room, one night, please."

"For two?" the woman in front of me asked, raising her eyebrows.

"No." I chuckled tiredly. "One for me, alone."

I paid and ended up in the elevator with a key. I yawned as the doors were closing but the guy from earlier stopped them to join me and once again, I felt nervous.

"I had already booked a room before leaving the airport." he explained when I sent him an awkward smile. "Your flight was delayed too?"

"Yea."

He nodded and I started biting my bottom lip, holding the handle of my luggage even harder., so hard that my fingers turned white. I didn't know why but he was making me nervous, and when the door opened again, I rolled my bag behind me until I heard his voice again.

"Hey." he let out, making me turn around. "I'm gonna go to the bar on the first floor, to get a drink. If you want to join me, you're welcome."

I looked at him for a few seconds, debating if it was a good idea or not and if I should actually go, until I noticed the doors close again between us, making me jump slightly.

"Uhm, okay."

I spent too long just looking at the closed doors, motionless and alone on the hall of the 6th floor. I didn't know this man but somehow, he made a short impact on my night and when I took my shoes off and sat on my bed, he sitll hadn't left my mind. I was not the type to talk to strangers let alone befriend them, but somehow, i felt lonely in this stupid hotel room. I got up quickly, leaving my bag there, and walked to the bathroom to look at myself in the mirror. I had left my coat on the bed along with my boots next to the door and what I was looking at was horrible. My make up was almost all gone, leaving small traces of black under my eyes,  and my hair was a mess. I looked at my reflection and sighed. It was a miracle someone had invited me for a drink. Perhaps, he was desperate or very lonely himself.

I just wanted to take off my jeans and put on sweatpants but instead, I closed my eyes and shook my head. The truth was, a drink would be very appreciated. I grabbed my wallet, my phone and my key before walking out of my room and taking the elevator again. I felt my heart beat harder the whole ride and when the 'ding' was heard, telling me I was on the main floor, I swallowed hard.

It was mostly the kind of person who carried their friends through decades. I wasn't good at making new friends or even opening up. Going to meet a strange at a hotel bar was very out of character for me but somehow, it was thrilling.

As soon as I walked in I noticed him but instead to talk to him, I walked to the bar and asked for a shot and a drink, if only to ease my nerves. Everything stressed me. from spending the evening, drinking with a stranger, to going back to see my parents for Christmas, and it was not easy to handle. I grabbed the shot and swallowed it quickly before giving my room number to the barman and taking a long sip of my 'sex on the beach'. It took about a minute and a half until the man in the cab sat next to me and I licked my lips before turning to him.

"Niall Horan." he just said, extending his hand.

I grabbed it and shook it slightly with a small smile. "Mimi. Armstrong."

"Thank you for accepting my invitation, Mimi." he just said as his lips curled. "I would have paid for your drink, you should have let me."

I raised my nose up and shook my head a bit. "Na, it's cool, I'm not here because you invited me." I joked, making him chuckle. "I just needed a drink. Cheers?"

He clinked his glass of what looked like rum and coke against mine and I laughed a bit.

"So, Mimi Armstrong, where were you going?" he asked as I was swallowing what was left of my glass. He made a sign to the bartender and pointed my drink before pointing himself and I felt my heart skip a beat when I realized he was putting my drink on his bill. When was the last time something like that had happened to me?

"It's the holidays, of course I'm going in my family." I let out, not really mentioning that I normally never spend Christmas with my family. "What about you?"

He twisted his glass in his hands and chuckled sadly. "I'm going back home. My mom is probably already there. I invited her for the holidays. I just hope I can get there in time. I don't want her to spend a lonely Christmas, that's why I invited her in first place."

"Where are you from?"

"Ireland, and you?" he asked, raising his eyebrows.

I turned to Niall and blinked a few times. I should have guessed from his accent that he was Irish but for some reason, I didn't. His blue eyes roamed on my face and I suddenly felt self-conscious. Why did he even invite me here for a drink? It was ridiculous to be lonely to the point of inviting a random stranger like me to drink for the evening.

"Oh, here and there." I admitted with a shrug. "I don't really know."

"Wait." he frowned, tilting his head slightly. "You don't know where you're from?

I stared at him for a few second again until the bartender put an other drink in front of me. I grabbed it and sipped half of it quickly from the straw, not really sure I wanted to answer sincerely his question. After all, I didn't know him, and I was not the type to open up anyway.

"I'm from everywhere and nowhere, it doesn't matter."

[kiwi-bitchez]

hey love can you maybe do a shower smut one shot? don't feel pressured like if u don’t wanna do it it’s fine!

Water Pressure

Reader x Peter Parker

Reader and Peter are both college-aged. College!Neighbor!AU I guess?

Word count: 4.5k

Warnings: Smut, shower sex, oral sex, face sitting, dick sucking, soap getting in your eyes, unreliable landlords

New York City in the summer was a great place to be. The stress of school was lifted off your shoulders, and you were lucky enough to be interning at your dream job. You were grateful for the opportunity to stay in the city after the semester ended, not having to move back home to your small town. However, there was one thing about summer in the city that was unbearable: the heat.

It was like a wet blanket that hit you every time you stepped out of your apartment, not that the tiny window box unit you had made much of a difference indoors. It was oppressive and heavy and difficult. You managed to survive with ice packs and cold showers. That was… until this afternoon.

You hike up the seven flights of stairs to your tiny apartment. The building was under serious renovations and didn’t have a working elevator, flickering lights, strange noises in the night. But it was seriously cheap rent compared to the other buildings in the area, so you were willing to make the sacrifices. Not many people lived on your floor, most of the rooms had been occupied by college students whose leases ended at the end of the school year.

You press your sweaty forehead against the chipped paint of the door as you fumble with your keys for a moment.

“Hey y/n, you good?” your neighbor from across the hall asks as he steps out of his apartment to leave for the afternoon.

“Yeah, thanks Flash. Its just so damn hot out. I’d suggest bringing some water wherever you’re going,” you respond. You sneak a peak into his apartment for a second before the door swings shut, getting a glance of his roommate Peter who was playing video games on the couch.

You were grateful to have them as neighbors, they were nice enough, would let you borrow a cup of sugar every once in a while, and weren’t too loud like the previous people you had lived near in college. It didn’t hurt that Peter was nice to look at. He was incredibly nice, and a little dorky, which only added to his charm. It wasn’t long into the summer before you had developed a little crush on him.

You had seen him around campus before, but never really got to know him. His best friend Ned had been your calculus tutor sophomore year, so you saw him in passing but never more than a wave or a smile. Now that he was living across the hall you saw him almost every day, lucky you.

You finally make it into your shoebox apartment and drop your stuff down on the kitchen counter. It wasn’t much cooler inside as it was outside, unfortunately. You immediately shed yourself of your slightly sticky clothing, peeling the few layers off your damp skin. It had become routine to hop in the shower as soon s you get home, an attempt to bring your body temperature down a few degrees and wash the sweat from your hair.

A sigh of relief escapes you as the ice cold water hits your face. The air of the city left a certain layer of grime on you that always felt nice to wash off. You allow yourself to use a large dollop of shampoo, wanting to scrub the roots of your hair from any sweat and dirt that the city had left.

It was moments like this that you cursed your landlord, cursed the building that you lived in, and cursed whatever higher power was in charge of your utilities. Your water shuts off. You jiggle the knob, hoping the water would turn back on, but it only lets out a few sad drips.

This had happened before, and typically wasn’t too big of a problem, however you had a mound of soapy hair on the top of your head that was starting to drip down your body. You let out an exasperated groan, not knowing what to do. You hop out and stick your head in the sink, hoping to use the sink water to rinse some of the shampoo suds out of your hair.

Of course the sink wouldn’t turn on either, and now your head was upside down in your tiny bathroom sink, soapy wet hair all in your face. When you stand up, the suds drip into your eyes and mouth, making you frown and scrunch your eyes up tight.

You grab the towel from the door hook and wrap it around your dripping body. In a moment of panic, soap burning in your eyes and starting to drip onto the floor, you decide to leave your apartment. It was a last ditch effort, but you needed this shampoo out of your hair and maybe their shower was working.

“Hey Peter?” you yell as you knock a few times, your other hand holding up the wet towel, “I need some help.”

You feel a little relieved when you hear his footsteps approaching, however that relief turns to embarrassment very quickly when he opens the door and you remember your current state.

“Y/n…. um…” he is a little confused.

“Sorry, my water shut off and I have soap in my eyes and in my hair and all over the floor,” you start to ramble, not really able to see him through your scrunched up soapy face, “is your water working? Can I use it for just a second.”

He starts laughing, which makes you feel a little bit better, you let out a laugh too. “Sure thing, I think it’s working.”

He runs over to the kitchen and turns on the sink, “Seems to be working fine, feel free to use the shower.”

“I…um…” you stand blindly in the frame of his doorway, dripping water and your hair a soapy mess in your face.

“Here, let me help you,” he laughs again. He takes your arm and guides you into their bathroom, his apartment the same model as yours just mirrored. “I have to leave, but feel free to take your time and let yourself out when you’re done.”

“Thank you so much, you’re a life saver,” you hear the door close behind you and you step into the shower, fumbling with the knob for a second before the water shoots out. You feel your heart rate slow as the soap is finally washed from your face.

You had only started to run your fingers through your tangled hair when you hear the bathroom door open again. Your eyebrows furrow as you start to peek your head out of the curtain. You see a figure for a second, floppy brown hair that could only be Peters. His hand quickly moves to the curtain, closing it in front of your face.

“Peter, what the fuck,” you start to ask.

“Shhh,” he shushes you and keeps the shower curtain closed tightly with his arm.

“Peter, what-” you begin to ask again before hearing Flash’s loud voice from the hallway.

“Hey dude, you in the shower?” He asks Peter.

“Umm, yeah, what’s up?” His voice is tense. You’re incredibly confused and just stand there in the shower enjoying the cold water.

“Just forgot my wallet. You mind if I take a piss?”

“Uhh,” before Peter can respond the doorknob starts to wiggle. You wonder why he doesn’t just tell Flash that you’re using the shower, but the situation is hard to gauge from inside.

“Fuck-” Peter mutters as he swiftly hops into the shower with you.

You turn to face him, about to throw your hands up, but it all happens too quickly. Before you can even ask what the fuck is going on his hand comes up to cover your mouth. Your eyes almost pop out of your head and your knees almost buckle when you finally see Peter.

Standing in the shower in front of you from the neck up was your neighbor Peter, the science whiz, nerdy, cute, t-shirt wearing, floppy haired Peter you had come to know. From the neck down…was Spider-man. Tight red and black suit that hugged his body, hand covering your mouth was gloved in a strange material that felt cold against your skin.

His face was incredibly panicked, his eyes almost as wide as yours. His other hand frantically came up to his face, signaling you to be quiet with a finger to his lips. Not that you had a choice, his large suited hand was tightly covering the lower half of your face.

You didn’t even have the time or focus to be embarrassed about being naked in front of him. You were overwhelmed with confusion and were too concentrated on the superhero in front of you to bother covering yourself up.

He throws his head back in annoyance as you can hear Flash peeing a few feet away, humming all the while.

“Alright man, have a good day,” he yells as he exits the bathroom.

“Yeah, you too,” Peter tries to keep his voice cool but you can hear an underlying shakiness.

As soon as the door slams shut he removes his hands from your mouth, but is still frantically gesturing for you to stay quiet. A few seconds pass and you hear the front door shut, he lets out a sigh of relief, but you can’t say the same for yourself.

His eyes grow wide again, realizing that he’s in the shower with you, and you’re naked. He scrunches his eyes shut and quickly turns around.

“Sorrysorrysorry,” he runs his hands through his hair, a little damp now from the condensation of the shower.

Before he can continue you grab his arm and turn him around, “What the fuck Peter,” you were still absolutely stunned, “what…”

“I’m sososo sorry I didn’t mean to be a creep or anything, I didn’t know he was gonna come into the bathroom and I had to hide…” you could tell he was just as nervous as you.

“I…what…” your brain still could not form words, “you’re… you’re…”

“Spiderman, yeah, and I really need you to not tell anyone please,” his eyes were wide with worry. At a split second you had thought this was a joke, or maybe he just dresses up in his free time or something, but no. The way his hand felt on your mouth and the terror in his eyes told you this was real, too real.

You give him a nod, “of course, of course.”

“It’s my biggest secret, and I can’t afford for Flash to find out because, well, I don’t think he’s kept anything to himself his entire life.”

You laugh a little, but your body still feels rigid and your mind is still swarming with questions. “But I think I can trust you,” he says, somewhere in between a question and a statement.

“Yes, you can trust me,” you could see ease creep onto his face, the wide-eyed, fearful look was slowly melting away. “Ned knows?” Out of all the questions you had, why was this the one you asked? It just slipped out.

“Yeah, Ned knows,” It was weird that you two were still in the shower, but you were both still too shaken up to realize or care.

“And…” you start.

“And that’s it. You and Ned.”

A deep pit begins to form in your stomach, “You aren’t gonna kill me or something, are you? Cuz I promise I won’t tell anyone; I swear.”

“Nonono,” he panics, “No, I’m one of the good guys, I don’t kill people. I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“Sorry, I- I don’t know why I said that,” you felt bad for implying anything, you were just nervous that your newfound knowledge of Peter would change things.

“It’s okay that you’re freaked out, I’m- I’m sorry for putting you in this position.”

Without really thinking you turn around and face the water. You needed to feel something other than confusion, embarrassment, shock, and fear. You spin back around after a moment, Peter still standing there in the same state of shock and confusion as you.

“So you’re Spiderman,” you say with assurance, “wow.”

“I’m sorry, I’ll get out, I’m sorry if I’m being super weird.”

No part of you blamed him for his actions, you knew he wasn’t making up excuses to hop into a cold shower with you. And you didn’t blame him for lingering. He was just answering your questions, explaining himself. That was reasonable.

“No,” you weren’t sure what to say to get him to stay, “step into the water, it will make you feel better, I promise.”

He stared at you with a blank expression for a second, not knowing how to take your suggestion. He was also concentrating immensely on concealing the erection that was prominently poking against the material of his suit. He wanted to remove himself before you noticed before you could realize that he had been looking at you.

You had noticed. For a split second, while admiring how nice he looked in the skin tight suit your eyes wandered south and caught a glimpse of his hard on under the suit. He still looked nervous, a new kind of nervous though.

Placing your hands on his shoulders, making somewhat of a bold move, you reassure him, “It’s okay Peter, it’s just me.”

There was something lingering in the space between you. The fact that neither one of you had rushed to escape the shower at the first possible second was one thing. You hadn’t tried to cover yourself up. You looked him in the eye when speaking to him with an air of sincerity and understanding.

“How does it come off?” you ask, genuinely curious as it seemed to be air-tight against his body.

His hand slowly comes up to the center of his chest, pressing down on the spider logo. The material seems to evaporate off him, expanding and stretching until it pooled at his feet.

The wide look in your eyes had turned to something else entirely, they boy you had been stealing glances of for the past few months was naked and in the shower with you. Albeit, the circumstances that got you here were not ideal.

You take his hands and move them up to your face, encouraging his strong hands to cup your cheeks on either side. The way he was looking at you made something inside you stir. You tried to close some of the empty space between you, as he tentatively pulled your face to his.

The kiss was soft and gentile, your lips hovered over his for a moment before connecting. Your arms wrapped around his neck, a hand moving up to his damp curls. He pulls away slowly, eyes remaining closed for a moment after your lips had parted.

“This…” he whispers, “this isn’t just because you think I’m gonna kill you or something.”

“No,” you laugh, “I wanted to do that before I knew your secret identity. I’ve wanted to do that for a while.”

“Me too,” he mumbles into your lips as he moves to kiss you again, this one was harder and more sure. His hands run up and down your body, wrapping around your waist and snaking up to your chest.

You couldn’t help but let out a whimper as his tongue met yours. Your hands were resting on his chest, toned and perfect.

“You’re really warm,” you comment with some concern, as his skin was burning underneath your touch.

“It’s a…spider sense thing,” he wasn’t quite sure how to go about explaining his abilities to you.

“Here, step into the cold water,” you had forgotten where you were for a second. You felt bad about his water bill, you had been in here for quite a while, and hopefully would be here for a while more.

You clenched your thighs together as you watched him step under the water and run his hands through his now wet hair. It was like a scene out of a movie, the way his muscles rippled with each movement, the way his lips remained slightly parted as the water washed over his face.

His arms wrapped around your waist to pull you under the stream of water with him. The sensation of his face pressed to yours, lips interlocking as the water rolled down your face was unreal. You shift your body towards his, pressing your chest flat to his. You could feel his hard cock pressing against your stomach, making your thighs clench again.

“Will you touch me?” you whimper into his mouth, sounding desperate and weak. You move your hand over his, showing him where you wanted him most.

“Fuck,” he groans as his fingertips make contact with your wet folds. His hands are much bigger and stronger than yours, the sensation causes your eyes to flutter shut.

You move your hands down to his already hard cock, rubbing it up and down, somehow making it harder. Your mouth falls agape as he slips a digit into you, cool water still running over your body.

He takes your lower lip in between his, sucking on it in the process. He slowly pushes you back so your body meets the tile shower wall. One hand working between your legs and the other palming at your chest has you seeing stars. Your head rolls back, giving him access to suck and nip at your neck.

Fuck, why had you not done this sooner? He had been right across the hall all summer and only now were you finally experiencing what you had been daydreaming about.

“Peter,” you moan out, continuing to stroke his erection, “I need you.”

He mumbles into your neck, now littered with red splotches. He curls his fingers up into you, making your legs buckle a little, “Fuck,” you gasp out, “please.”

“Peter I need you to fuck me,” you can feel him smile into your skin, “but I’m worried about running u your water bill.”

“You don’t want me to take you right here?” he pushes against you so your back is flat up against the wall. All you can do is moan in response, his fingers still making work inside you.

Slowly detaching his lips from your chest and removing his fingers from you, he moves back into the water to turn the shower off. While he faces away, you slowly drop down to your knees, thighs spread apart and tongue laying flat out of your mouth.

You look up at him with big blinking eyes as he turns around to face you.

“Holy shit,” he hovers above you, “You’re gonna kill me, you know that, right?”

“Can I?” you ask as your head moves towards his cock. He nods and gives you permission before you lick a long stripe up the underside. His eyes closed and his head falls back as you take his tip into your mouth, rolling your tongue around his sensitive head.

“You’re sure this isn’t just because I’m Spiderman?” he manages to ask in between deep breaths.

“Peter,” you pause your sucking and continue to stroke him, “I’ve thought about having your cock in my mouth every day this summer. Every time we rode the elevator together, or passed each other in the hallway, I’ve wanted you.”

You go back to taking his length into your mouth, bobbing your head up and down, loving the noises he makes as you take him deeper.

“Do you want to go to my room?” He asks, “the bathtub floor can’t be comfortable to kneel on.”

You stand up and place a gentle kiss on his mouth, “That’s very thoughtful,” you kiss him again between thoughts, “I would love to.”

He takes you by surprise as his arms quickly lift you up, wrapping your legs around his firm torso. He carries you with ease to his small bedroom, tossing you back onto his messy comforters.

Climbing back on top of you, peppering your body with kisses as he makes his way up to your face, your lips finally meet with Peter’s again. You bite down a little onto his lower lip as his hand tangles its way into your wet hair, the other resuming its place between your legs.

You let out a low moan, only to be cut off by him whispering in your ear, “Will you sit on my face?” You pull back, a little stunned at his question, mouth parted at the way his fingers continued to twist inside you.

“All those times we were in the elevator or the hallway, and you were thinking about my cock in your mouth, I was thinking about you sitting that pretty pussy of yours on my face, riding my tongue.”

That sent a shiver down your spine that pulsed in your already soaking wet cunt. “Holy fuck” you could not even begin to explain how turned on you are. Peter easily flips you over so that you are now straddling him, his lips moving to suck down on one of your hard nipples.

You grind your crotch down onto him, missing the friction of his hand.

“Come here,” he lays flat down and guides your thighs up to either side of his head. Your mind was spinning with lust, completely fucked out and unable to concentrate as he uses his strong hands to lower you down onto his face.

His hands wrapped comfortable around your waist, fingertips diffing perfectly into your soft skin. A deep moan escapes you as he starts to lap up and down your slit. His tongue moves easily across you, lapping up and down, around your clit, into your hole, all of it. Your eyes were permanently rolled into the back of your head.

His grip on your waist started to guide your hips back and forth, rolling your core across his eager tongue. Every time your hips buckled forward and your clit made contact with his tongue waves of pleasure shot up your body. You couldn’t help but lean forward, using his headboard as support as he completely owned you with just his tongue.

“Peter,” his name comes out as a strangled moan, “I’m gonna come soon, fuck.”

He hums into you, adding vibrations to the slick wetness. “I want to come on your cock, fuck. Please, Peter, I need you to fuck me.”

Although you couldn’t get enough of his tongue, the way he was taking control over you, you were dying to feel him inside of you. You wanted to feel your walls clench around him as you came.

He laps a few more times at your sensitive clit, almost pushing you over the edge. He can tell you’re close by the way your thighs shook around his head, pressing against his ears. He starts to move, replacing his tongue with his fingers against your clit. He gracefully changes position, coming up behind you so you didn’t have to move at all.

You were already at the perfect angle, arms pressed up against the headboard and hips arched back for him. He continues to rub tight circles against you as he starts to run his tip up and down your soaking slit.

“You’re sure,” he knows you’ve already said yes, but he just wanted to make sure.

“Fuck, yes Peter please, please fuck me,” your words came out somewhere between a whine and a moan.

He pushes his tip into you slowly, and you rock back onto his cock, letting him slip deep into you. His mouth drops open for a second at the sensation of fucking you mixed with the way you looked with your head thrown back and ass bouncing against him.

“Peter, I’m gonna come please don’t stop.”

He picks up his pace, fucking into you faster while his fingers continued to rub your clit. He had only been inside you for a few moments, and he could already feel your tight walls gripping around his length, your orgasm washing over you and dripping all over his cock.

You fall forward a little, letting out gravely moans of his name and profane language. He fucks you through your orgasm, not letting up as you start to come down. He can start to feel your legs shake, so he removes his hand from your clit and takes a firm grip on either side of your ass. He kneads your flesh as he continues to bury his dick into you.

You were almost flat down on your stomach, hips still angled up for him, face buried into the pillows to muffle your loud moaning screams. He wanted to see your face as you cried out his name, so he pulls out and gently rolls you over, kissing up your thighs to give you a second to readjust.

He thought you looked incredibly beautiful, with your hair sprawled out around your head, your lips puffy and eyes fluttered shut.

He takes your chin between his thumb and his hand to angle your face up to his, kissing you passionately and deeply as he slipped back into you. You moan into the kiss, hands coming up to his hair.

He held one of your thighs back with his hand, giving him perfect access. Through fucking you he never stopped kissing you, only coming up to gasp for air when he felt you clench around him in pleasure. His thumb rubbed across your cheek, hand tucked perfectly under your jaw.

He loved the way you would whisper his name in between kisses, rolling your hips up into his.

He knew he wouldn’t last much longer, the way his dick swelled inside you as you sucked a mark onto his neck was a dead giveaway.

“You’re gonna make me cum, fuck,” he whispers to you, only encouraging you to grind your hips up more and kiss him harder.

He jolts back up onto his knees, pulling his dick out and rubbing the tip across your lower stomach as his come shoots out. You lift your hips up, collecting his come all on your stomach and dripping some down onto your inner thighs.

You can’t help but gawk at him as you watch him come undone, the way his brow furrowed and lips parted, the veins in his arm bulging as he stroked his cock.

He takes his length in his hand and rubs his red tip up and down your thighs, rubbing his come into your skin, spreading it around from your stomach to your legs. He slips back into you, slowly thrusting a few times before pulling back out.

“Holy shit,” you sigh as he lays down next to you, “that was…fucking hot.”

“You’re fucking hot,” he laughs.

He buries his head into your shoulder, leaving soft kisses across your skin.

“Um, can you get me a towel,” you laugh, gesturing to all the fluid on your lower half.

“Hmmm, no I don’t think so,” he jokes, “I think I want you right here, just like this for a while.”

“You certainly earned it,” you joke back before he hops up, grabbing a warm wet towel to wash you off with.

“Damn, well now I hope my water never comes back on,” you quip as he flops back down next to you.

“You are welcome to come use mine any time, even if yours is working fine.”

“You mean it?”

“Of course.”

[sativaasiren]

Line without a Hook: Part 7

Pairing: Oikawa Tooru x Reader

Genre: slow burn, fluff

Summary: Y/N is a shy student, but with a cat sized curiosity. Will her curiosity get the best of her when she overhears about Great King and his Kingdom? Will he even notice her in a crowd of adoring fans?

Notes:  Sorry for the delay! I wanted to really do this fic justice so I took a few weeks to mull over the plot direction and where I wanted this to go!

Time stopped feeling linear the moment you laid down to go to sleep and didn’t resume its normal flow when you woke up. Your date with Oikawa was today and you needed to nail this. You’ll never get another chance to make a perfect first date with your crush. He probably had a lot more experience in this area of his personal life than you did. You had never been on a date before.

The morning was spent cleaning your house and helping your mother with chores. Normally you’d be hesitant to volunteer to do extra chores but you needed something physical to keep your mind on instead of the building anxiety in the pit of your stomach.

You wrapped up cleaning the kitchen around 4PM to give yourself time to get ready. Rushing through your shower, you needed as much time as possible to curate an outfit. Sitting in a towel on the floor, you searched through piles of clothes, hoping something would jump out and scream “pick me!” but you weren’t going to get lucky twice in one week.

Rifling through a stack of sweaters, you paused when you uncovered a pink sweater with a strawberry milk container printed on it. What if you dressed to match your nickname? Would he notice?

Grasping at the fabric, you pulled it out of the pile and set it aside. It was late spring and warm enough for a multitude of bottom options but something about this screamed skirt. You wore a skirt every day as part of your uniform and felt more comfortable in them than the jeans and leggings you had laying around your closet and floor. A simple black skirt? Perfect.

You hunted around the room, searching for the skirt in question. You searched through every pile twice before finding it. Your nerves were showing and your senses were taking the hit.

Glancing over at the clock, you noted you only had 15 minutes before Tooru was expected to arrive and you had no grasp on his timeliness. Quickly getting dressed, you stood in front of the mirror in your room, stuck again. “What am I going to do about my hair?”

You pulled out a large box full of hair accessories, hoping something would jump out at you. There were clips, pins, ribbons, and scruchies scattered with no organizational system inside. After moving around the layers of stuff, keeping your eyes peeled, there it was. A pink silk scrunchie with strawberries printed on it. If he didn’t notice the top, he would almost certainly notice this.

Pulling your (H/C) hair back, you decided on a simple updo, pulling your long hair in front into a small ponytail that sat upon the loose hair in the back. Pulling two tendrils out to frame your face in the front, you dusted yourself off and did a half turn. It wasn’t much but it would do for now. Had you not been so excited and wound up over the idea of a date, you could have put more thought into what you were wearing.

Picking up a small clear tube of lip gloss, you gently applied it to your lips and threw it into your purse, along with your cell phone, wallet, and whatever various trash that had since accumulated since the last time you dumped your purse out and cleaned it.

While you were thumbing through your purse, trying to analyze if you had everything you needed, the doorbell rang and the urge to pretend you weren’t home rushed to the forefront of your mind. “I could hide in the closet. Pretend I forgot?”

You shook your head and slowly made your way to the door, using the extra seconds to brace yourself. Reaching for the gold door handle, you took one last deep breath, and turned it.

The sun that was hanging low in the sky made for the perfect illumination for him. If he looked any more angelic, he would belong in a story book. Oikawa was grinning before you had even opened the door and it only got wider when he saw you. “Yahoo, look at my little cutie. You get more beautiful every time I see you. Are you ready?”

Still squeezing the handle of the door like a stress ball, you bashfully nodded. You had to let go of the door to get your shoes from beside it. Crouching down to slide into small black heels with a tiny ankle strap, you fastened them and stood back up with care. You were out of practice on heels. The last time you wore them, you vaguely remembered being weak and deer like, trying to maintain a mature image at a family wedding. Hopefully this time, you’d look more graceful.

“Let me grab my purse and we can go.” Of course you had forgot it, you were so wired that you had moved to the front door on autopilot. Leaving Tooru leaning against your door frame, you retreated back to your room and grabbed the purse where you had left it, teetering on the edge of the bed. Tooru watched you leave and enjoyed the sight, waiting for you to turn around so he could really take you in. This wasn’t the first time he had seen you in a skirt, but the heels were. Maybe it won’t be the last time.

You returned to the door almost as quick as you had when you left it. “I’m ready, let’s go.” You turned the locks on the door while Oikawa slowly backed up enough to give you room to exit. You grabbed the door handle and backed out into your front porch, twisting the handle to ensure it was locked. You were happy to fixate on your surroundings instead of him for the time being, you wanted to stare and take him in all night, but that would seem creepy and you couldn’t handle the sheer excitement that rose inside you when you saw him.

You turned to face him and smiled softly. “So King, you never did tell me where we were going on a date.”. Oikawa chuckled and rubbed the back of his neck. “It’s a surprise. We can head there now.”. Tooru reached out his hand, offering to take yours. You panicked but couldn’t stop your hand from automatically reaching out and taking his. Your heart was soaring, or maybe falling off a cliff, they both felt the same didn’t they?

Your walk side by side felt comforting, picturesque. The silence felt safe. Tooru squeezed your hand and started to speak.

“I can’t stop thinking about you, Strawbery. You’re making volleyball hard to focus on.”

You froze for a second. You were taking him away from his hobby. “I’m sorry...” your voice soft and with the slight wobble of pressure to say the right things.

Tooru laughed “It’s not a bad thing, I spend a lot of time on volleyball, I could use a break sometimes...”

Hiding how surprised you were by this conversation, you wanted it to keep going. Learn as much about him as he’ll let you. The King was elusive and while the rumors had been rampant, what was actually known about the inner workings of Tooru Oikawa was few and far between.

“So does that mean you don’t get out much? I thought volleyball was everything to you?”

Oikawa exhaled through his nose, guiding you to turn down another street. “It is everything, and it’s still my dream, but perhaps there could be room for other things.” He took a pause, and you chose not to fill it with words, giving him time to continue.

“I know you’re aware of my fanclub, and what that comes with. Gifts, snacks, phone numbers, but they don’t mean much. The girls chase me around, begging for my attention, but it’s tiring. Don’t get me wrong, I love that I have a fanclub and the fans mean a lot to me, but they only know The Great King, and i’m not so sure they would like me.”

You were looking down at your feet, you didn’t want to say the wrong thing and taint this pure moment of honesty. After a beat, you decided to comment. “Why wouldn’t they like you? You’re amazing, and you light up any room you’re in. It’s a gift to be speaking to you. The Great King may be a nickname, but it comes from how great you truly are and appear to be. I want to know both sides of you”. Shit. Words came out too fast and you were gushing about him TO him.

Oikawa squeezed your hand again. “That’s why you’re here and they’re not. You’re different than the rest of the girls. I could see it from the first time you came to one of my games. Your eyes, you yearn to know. To understand. So now I’m going to show you. We’re almost there, just a few more minutes”

You casually reached up with your free hand and rubbed at your chest but it didn’t alleviate how you were feeling. He really did pick you, and it wasn’t something he did often. You were special to him.

Oikawa kept leading you down to your destination, opting to go down a slightly worn dirt road. It was hard to walk without stumbling but the anxiety kept you hyper alert to your footsteps and you managed to look outwardly cool.

“Here we are! Sorry for the lengthy trip, but I thought it would be good to be away from prying eyes.”

You were at a small plot of land at the end of a dirt road. It was lush, speckled with flowers and a few trees for cover from the sunlight, and completely isolated. The rest of the surrounding land was completely wooded. There would be no one around to overhear your conversation.

Oikawa looked you up and down, taking in your stunned reaction to where you were. He stopped his gaze onto your shoes and laughed. “It might be a struggle to get down to our spot in those. Can I carry you?”

You instinctively reached up to cover your mouth and part of your face, poorly hiding the blush rising across your cheeks. “S-sure. Thank you”.

Oikawa let go of your hand and you already missed his touch. He approached you, getting as close as he could and reached down to put his arm behind your knees and one behind your back. Oikawa lifted you and carried you like a bride down the small hill at the opening of the plot and headed down towards the end of the expanse. You wrapped your arms around his neck for stability, clinging to him and nuzzled softly under his chin.

Tooru carried you as if you weighed almost nothing, the strength training he did for volleyball paying off. Once he got to the back tree line, he gently set you down on your feet. “Alright, almost ready.” Tooru walked behind a tree and you tilted your head to watch him. What on earth was he doing?

Oikawa reappeared with a basket and a bundle under his arm. Setting the basket down, he untucked the bundle and shook it out into the air. The large fleece blanket unfurled and he slowly set it down on the grass.

“There ya go. Have a seat, little cutie”. You reached behind and brushed your skirt, making sure it was still in place from being carried and sat down on the left side of the blanket. You tucked your legs under your body and looked up, watching Oikawa carefully.

Oikawa set the basket down in the middle of the blanket and took his seat on the right side. “Now we can get started.”

[sxfterhearts]

11. [3:21 pm]

The leaves rustled above your head in the warm spring breeze, a pleasing melody that drifted into your ears as you sat under the tree, waiting. The late afternoon sunlight filtered through the leaves, creating a mosaic of shadows on the ground around you. You closed your eyes, basking in nature’s gifts. In a distance, the school bell sang in a high-pitched voice, signalling the end of the school day for the rest of the students.

As it was already Friday, your entire year was allowed the option of either staying in school for study period or to go home and revise for the national exams. It came as no surprise that most students preferred to go home and engage in other activities not related to studying, such as window shopping or catching up with friends over a hearty meal.

You couldn’t blame them, though. This year was the most stressful academic year yet, and it was totally understandable to take a break once in a while. However, you couldn’t afford this luxury as you had a Chemistry test next Monday, and you stayed back to attend tutoring sessions with your teacher.

All your classes had ended. On a normal Friday, you would already be on the bus back home with your best friend who lived across the road from you, a cup of bubble tea in each of your hands. But today wasn’t a normal Friday.

Today, someone promised to meet you after school – a boy. Now, this came as quite of a surprise to you because, for one, you went to an all-girls school. The only males you came into regular contact with was your male teachers or your father.

Another thing was that you didn’t know who this someone was. He had passed a note to you via your friend, under the instructions of her boyfriend, who attended the all-boys school close to yours. All you knew about this mystery person was that you were to wait for him at the park outside your school, and that he had careful, immaculate handwriting.

Also, he was late. The note said he would be there at three. It was nearly twenty past, and you were starting to think about leaving.

You drummed your fingers against your thighs absentmindedly, humming along to the song playing through your earbud in your right ear. Out of habit, you took the left earbud out to listen. Along with the cheerful notes of your song, there was also a bird chirping somewhere in the tree. A car honking, probably to urge students to cross the road quickly. The school bus groaned as it opened its doors to eager students, looking forward to the start of the weekend. A dog barking on the sidewalk. Rushed footsteps, muted by the grass.

The footsteps increased in volume by the second, until finally, it stopped. You were acutely aware of tired panting as the owner of said footsteps caught their breath. The patterns created by the leave’s shadows ceased to exist. The person must have been standing behind you, you concluded.

“Noona,” A voice called. You turned your head, looking up at the towering figure that was Kim Yugyeom. “Sorry I’m late, it’s just,” A pause for a deep breath. “Practice ran overtime, the hyungs didn’t let me leave until we absolutely nailed the choreography.”

“Kim Yugyeom? You wrote me that note?” Confused was an understatement.

The boy standing before you was someone you’ve only seen three times in your life. The first time, when you went bowling with your friends and they invited their boyfriends, who extended the invitation to their group of friends. The second time was during your interschool basketball competition, where some of the boys from their school came to cheer your team on. The third time, not too long ago, was accidental. You stayed a bit too late at the community library to study for a midterm and missed the last bus home. Just as you were pacing around the bus stop, about to call your parents, the boy spotted you across the street. He recognised you as a friend of his hyung’s girlfriend, and had kindly offered you a ride home. You politely declined at first, but then you remembered that your mum was babysitting your cousin’s daughter and your dad was working overtime that night. You accepted gratefully, promising to pay him back in the future with a drink. Yugyeom assured you there was no need for that, and spent the rest of the car ride making light conversation about school. Honestly, you didn’t think you would see him again so soon.

“Yeah…” He loosened his tie slightly and undid the top bottom. Wiping the sweat off his brow, he explained, “I didn’t want to text you or anything because I haven’t asked for your number. I mean, I could’ve got it from Jackson hyung, but I didn’t want to invade your privacy like that. I hope you don’t mind.”

“No, not at all.” You shook your head quickly, touched by his thoughtfulness. “But, I have to ask, why did you want to see me?”

“About that…” Yugyeom looked down at his feet, sporting a small grin. “I’ll tell you later. Do you want to go for bubble tea? There’s a shop near my school where I can get a discount.”

It was as if he read your mind. Getting bubble tea on the way home was your tradition on Fridays, and your best friend was sad that you had ditched her for a boy. “Sure, I go there every Friday anyways.”

“Really? How come I’ve never seen you there?” He helped you up on your feet as you slung your backpack over your shoulders.

“It’s probably because I go after school ends, I stay for study period with my friend. When do you go?” You walked past the school gates side by side, your hands on your backpack straps, his in his pockets.

“Ah,” His face lit up in realisation. “These past two weeks we’ve been staying til seven or eight to rehearse, that’s probably why. And before that I’d go right after the lunch bell rings and head to the basketball courts.”

You nodded. The walk to the bubble tea shop was short, consisting of questions along the lines of “how are you?” and “what subjects do you do?”. To be honest, you didn’t know much about this boy. Yugyeom was a friend of your boyfriend who studied in the all-boys school affiliated to yours, a year below you. He lived and breathed dance, and was always drinking iced-chocolate.

Today, you also learned that he was a part of a dance team before high school, had an older brother, and couldn’t stand the taste of coffee. You, on the other hand, were an only child, consumed two cups of coffee daily, and was also in the same dance team a few years back. It has been awhile and you’ve long since given up on your dreams of professional dancing, but you vaguely remembered thinking Yugyeom looked oddly familiar when you first spotted him across the bowling alley. There was no way you would’ve recognised him though, as the two of you were a year apart and placed into different groups.

The sweet fragrance of brown-sugar coated pearls filled your nostrils as you stepped into the store. You greeted the girl behind the counter, your classmate who recognised you from your weekly trips.

Turning to the boy beside you, you asked, “What are you getting? It’s my treat.”

Searching for his wallet in his pockets, he furrowed his eyebrows. He urgently patted his blazer pockets, trouser pockets and back pockets. A sigh left Yugyeom’s lips. “I’m gonna kill Bambam next week…” He muttered. “It’s alright, noona. My friend has my wallet. You go ahead.”

“You sure?” You quirked your eyebrows, finding his flustered expression cute.

“Yeah, I feel bad. I made you wait and now I can’t even buy you a drink. I’ll make it up to you next time, okay?”

“Don’t worry about it, Yugyeom. Go take a seat first, I’ll join you later.”

You gave your full attention to the cashier, giving her your regular order, a large Pearl Milk Tea with less ice and less sugar. She gave you a teasing smile as she keyed it in. You weren’t particularly close, but you were in the same study group for Chemistry and chatted briefly about the upcoming test while she prepared your drink.

Once she was done, you sipped happily on the sweet concoction while making your way towards Yugyeom, who had taken off his blazer and was sitting with his back facing you. You were curious about the purpose of his meeting.

“Noona, you’re done.” He put his phone away and looked towards you as you took a seat. “What did you get?”

“Just the normal milk tea. Are you thirsty? You can have some.” You offered, pushing the drink across the table.

“Thank you,” He smiled sheepishly. “I’ll only have a sip.” Before you could stop him, he picked up the drink and placed his lips on the straw. You watched, surprised, an unused straw in your hands.

“I was going to give you another straw…” You mumbled.

Yugyeom’s eyes widened. “Shit, I’m so sorry. I thought-” A panicked look flashed across his face. “It’s just, me and the hyungs, we share drinks all the time. I didn’t think you were saliva conscious. Should I get you another straw?”

“It’s okay,” While his actions alarmed you because, yes, you were saliva conscious, his words made you forgive him. “You didn’t know, it’s fine. I have another straw here.” You poked the straw through the drink when he handed it back to you hastily.

“I’m sorry, next time I’ll buy you another one next time, large, with any topping you like. You can choose the most expensive ones too.”

“Yugyeom, it’s fine.” You reassured him once more with a smile. “Now, what did you want to tell me?”

“Right,” He smiled mischievously. “Our school’s senior ball is coming up soon, and the student council asked us to do a performance. The hyungs and I, that is.”

“That’s great! I don’t mean to sound rude but, what does that have to do with me?” You wondered where this was going. It wasn’t uncommon for boys in their school to ask girls in yours as their ball date, but you didn’t know why he mentioned the performance specifically.

“See, we have a plan. We as in, all of us except for Jaebeom hyung. You know, the one with four piercings who sticks out his chin when he’s angry?”

You laughed at that, flashing back to bowling night, when Jaebeom’s team lost to yours by a point and all the boys made fun of him for his angry chin. “Yes, Lim Jaebeom, the b-boy?”

“Yes, him!” Yugyeom was clearly excited that you were engaging in his storytelling. “The thing is, he asked your class president to be his date for our ball, with our help, of course.”

“Last week, right? The entire school heard about it.” You laughed fondly at the memory. The class president was also your close friend, so she gave you and the girls a detailed account of what went down. “Who would’ve thought, your school’s bad boy and our school’s star student.”

“Jaebeom isn’t a bad boy,” He defended. “He just dresses like one. Deep down inside he’s a softie who loves cuddling while watching romcoms. Anyways, that’s besides the point. The rest of us are trying to help him to ask her out as his girlfriend.”

“What?” You exclaimed, surprised by the news. “He’s serious about her? He wants to be with her?” It was hard to determine whether he had serious feelings for your friend, because he seemed like a player. “Are you sure about this, Yugyeom? I know the two of them went to the same kindergarten and primary school, but does he really feel that way about her?”

“Yeah!”

“Positive? How do you know? You didn’t get his consent for this plan of yours…” You trailed off, uncertain. You didn’t want this to be some sort of big show to put on in front of the entire student body, for the sake of popularity. While you were happy for your class president that she was asked as his ball date, you didn’t want her to get heartbroken by such an act.

“Didn’t you notice the way he looks at her? There’s been at least three other girls who confessed to him this semester and he’s turned them all down. Every time she comes to watch our performances, Jaebeom always tells us about how he made eye contact with her from the stage. He is the only girl he talks about, ever.” He rebutted, clearly passionate about defending his friend.

“What about that girl?”

“What girl?”

“The one he posts on his Instagram stories, that girl… Nora?”

A part of Yugyeom was slightly jealous that you followed Jaebeom, and not him. “Nora is his cat, Y/N. There is no other girl. And since when did you follow his Instagram?”

“His cat?” It made sense, you suppose. “I don’t, I just saw a screenshot.”

Yugyeom leaned forward, interested by this new piece of information. “Wait, so you’re saying she screenshots his stories and sends them to you?”

“It’s common. That’s what girls do, Yugyeom.” You smiled, watching him put the puzzle pieces together in his head. Your reluctance to agree, in case your class president got hurt, and her talking about Jaebeom with her friends. It made sense.

“She likes him?” He asked, hopeful.

“Doesn’t matter, I’m not saying anything.” You sipped silently on your drink, chewing the pearls while Yugyeom’s mind raced.

“But you should tell me! It’ll make the plan so much easier.”

“What is the plan, anyways?”

Yugyeom launched into this elaborate explanation about how at the end of the performance, there was going to be a surprise couple’s dance, and after the song finishes with Jaebeom taking centre stage while twirling his date, the boys would hold up cardboard cut-outs of the words “Be my girlfriend”.

You nodded. It wasn’t a bad idea, albeit slightly cheesy, but you knew your friend was into that. “Does each of the boys have a date to the ball?”

“Well, not exactly… All the hyungs do, except for me.” He said in a soft voice.

“Your plan’s not going to work then, if you don’t have a date.” You stated matter-of-factly.

Yugyeom struggled to meet your eyes. “That’s sort of where you come in.” You froze. “Do you want to be my date and dance partner for the ball?”

You looked at him in disbelief. Sure, you were flattered that he asked you. You had watched their performance videos in the past and Yugyeom, although the youngest in their dance team, was undoubtedly the most experienced dancer. Being his dance partner meant you had to be at a certain level of dancing proficiency to be able to keep up with him. You were also somewhat amused that he asked you to be his date.

“I know it’s a lot to ask, and we don’t really know each other that well, but this is solely because of Jaebeom. I promise I won’t try to spike your fruit punch or make any unnecessary advances. We’ll just be partners for the night, and then we can carry on like nothing happened.” Yugyeom reached his hand out for a handshake, hopeful. “Besides, you’re one of the most competent dancers I know.”

“You’re just saying that to make me say yes,” Your eyes crinkled into crescents as you laughed. “Okay, I’ll do it, partner.” You clasped his hand in yours, shaking it firmly.

Yugyeom returned your eye-smile with his own, pumping his fist in celebration (for more reasons than one).

part 2

[dadzawa-adopt-dabi]

Secret baby chap2

(so a few notes here.i almost always post to tumblr first because i do heavier edits/changes when i post to Ao3 which is why this is going up now and not later when the full story on Ao3 will update. Second Rei is…not nice here. she’s under alot of pressure and says some shit she’s going to eventually have to awnser for. so um be prepared for that?)

Chapter 2

“Fuck. fuck. Fukfukfuk- oh my god fuyumi, wai-, what if i’m pregnant, how am, i need to.”  Touya struggled to get the words out fast enough and breath at the same time. 

“Calm down , we can figure this out, We just have to look at this like adults and be calm enough to think things through. Let’s make sure first, like you said, your sick a lot and your heats have never been regular.” Fuyumi crouched down and picked up the larger pieces of ceramic before throwing a towel over the rest for now. They could finish cleaning it up when they got back from the drug store.

“Go get your shoes on and we can go pick up a test while everyone is out. It’s why I wanted to do this now.” Fuyumi directed him.

Touya’s hand shook as he grabbed his coat and shoes. Thankfully he had his wallet in his pocket or he would have forgotten it. Fuyumi had to stop him from crossing a few roads without looking first. When he did stop she had to pull him along. Touya just let her guide him for the most part and held tightly to her hand as he tried to get himself to think about what he was going to do.

“We need to get a couple just in case,I’ll pay and tell dad if he checks that it was for a omega friend of mine” Fuyumi seemingly read Touya’s panicked thoughts.

“How much of this have you thought of Fuyumi? I still can’t think straight and you’ve already figured out a lie to tell enji” Touya hissed as they grabbed one of the first tests they saw from 3 diffrent brands and hurried to a checkout.

“A friend of mine really did have a scare last year, We looked at options and helped her plan out her first steps. Like getting tested and what to tell her partner. Making pro and con lists for her options.” Fuyumi paid and thanked the cashier then they were hurrying home again.

“The guy is a rising hero, we’re not even dating yumi, it was ju-” he stresses. 

“Just having fun, I know you’ve already said.” She pointed out. “Are you just not going to tell him then?”

“I’m going to think about what I want first.” Touya grabbed the bag with the tests and tossed them into his room before going back to pick up the mess from earlier.

“You don’t want to find out as soon as you can? Get the what if’s over with?” she asks when he came right back.

“Mom and shouto are going to be back soon. Natsou is also supposed to come back from the library any minute now unless he studies through it again.“ Touya pulls out his phone and unblocks Hawks. He starts to send a basic hey but the previous one text catches his eye.

“I can’t do this to him. The last text he sent me was just him asking me to say something because he hadn’t heard from me and wanted to know i was okay. What do I say to that? Hey thanks for worrying sorry i blocked you but i’m fine just pregnant with your kid.” Touya knows he shouldn’t be so sarcastic with fuyumi when she’s just trying to help but this is more stress than he can handle calmly.

“ Why did you stop talking anyways?” Fuyumi asked carefully. She didn’t want to pry but touya had gone from texting and smiling at his phone everyday to not having it go off at all.it had been nice to see him happy, even if only for a short period of time.

“He- i -look, he wanted more than hook ups and i’m not in a place i can allow that, i can’t invite him over to meet my mom or siblings and he started asking shit. About the burns and bruises and shit. What was I supposed to tell him? My personal life is off limits but thanks for the lay?” touya scoffed. Hawks cared too much for a hero, the job was going to end up crushing him and touya has no intentions of being around as Hawks stress relief or as his punching bag when it happened.

“It sounds like he cares about you” fuyumi asked softly and got started on making lunch. Their mom would probably appreciate not having to do it.

“Maybe we run off happily in the sunset and raise the baby together.” Touya missed Hawks, if he had to pick an alpha he supposed the blond wouldn’t be so bad. Touya shook his head and started helping fuyumi with lunch.

Natsou never comes home for lunch but his mom and baby brother arrive soon after it’s done.

Lunch passes quietly and Touya is still trying to figure out how to talk to hawks when his mother finishes folding laundry from earlier that day and takes his stack into his room.

“Touya” she comes out and her voice shakes.

“Yeah mom wha-” touyas voice dies in his throat as he turns around and sees the plastic bag he had carelessly left on his bed. The bag from the drugstore.

“Touya te-tell me these are for a friend and you’re just holding onto them.” the bag crinklies as her shaking becomes more pronounced.

Touya stares hard at the floor and wills his eyes not to spill the water he feels building up in them.

“Mom i’m s-”

“I didn’t even want you touya!” his mother is quickly entering hysterics. Touya flinches at the bluntness of it.

“I didn’t want any of you and now you’re out there spreading your legs for god knows who touya.whats your father going to say? What is he going to do touya! Did you think at all about anyone else?” she goes on. Touya doesn’t need to hear this. He really truly doesn’t.

“Don’t come to me asking for help telling your father and dont come to me asking for help raising yet another child I do not want.” she throws the bag at his feet and practically runs out of the room as tears continue streaming down touyas face.

He flips open his phone and stares at his messages from hawks until he gathers the will to move from the spot he’s been sitting and go hide his pregnancy tests in his backpack.

He hopes fuyumi hasn’t heard any of that.  He heads to bed early, scrolling through his phone and looking up pregnancy options.

His sister texts asking him when he’s going to take his tests. He knows if he’s pregnant he can’t stay here. It’s the first text of the night he sends and the only thing he’s truly sure of. He doesn’t even know if he is pregnant or going to keep her if he is. But if he is pregnant and he does decide to keep her then there’s no way in hell he’s going to raise her here. Afraid and knowing she was a mistake. 

Unwanted.

 Like touya himself is.

 His baby is going to grow up being loved and never ever knowing what brought her about.

He falls asleep exhausted and leaves before anyone else to get to school early enough to take the tests before first period.

They Are positive.

Fuck he has to tell hawks. He sits on the seat of the toilet and lets his head rest in his hands until he can quite cry long enough to send a simple text.

‘I’m pregnant, it’s yours and we need to talk about what I’m going to do’.

@ruelukas22

[solargroup09]

Yuevlive ep.3

× episode three

× yueliang “what a tragic day” vLive recap

× wc 815 words

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

- When the vLive starts Yueliang looks r o u g h;

- Her hair was braided but she has strands popping everywhere;

- It looks like she was in the middle of a storm;

- She is wearing a mask which is unusual because she likes to smile at the camera a lot;

- "Guys... today was a mess";

- Suns are worried but she reassures them: "Nothing bad happened, me and the members are fine but... guys today was my free day and nothing went as planned";

- She looks so defeated poor soul;

- Suns are asking her to tell them about her day;

- To get the atmosphere Yueliang is playing her "sad sad SAD playlist";

- "Today I only wanted to read, that's all I wanted";

- "But to read well you need the right snacks, so I went to the convenience store close to our dorm but, when I was going to pay, I realized I left my wallet at home! I had to leave all my sweets at the shop! I was so sad!" she complains;

- "On the way back to the dorm, obviously, it started POURING and I got so wet that water would flow out of my shoes at every step";

- Suns are sending her tons of hearts to make her feel better;

- "When I got to the dorm, I took a warm shower and I remembered we had leftovers from yesterday when we ordered fried chicken! I was so happy so I decided I'd eat that and finally read my new book! But of course, when I looked inside the fridge, we still had the box where the chicken came in but, someone ate all the leftovers and put the box back into the fridge! It was empty!";

- "How can someone be so evil? I swear if I find out who it was I'm going to hit them square in the face!"

- "Even if it was Hannah?" ask the fans;

- "Yes! She's my baby but I have no compassion for demons!";

- You know Yueliang is really mad when she won't hesitate to punish her baby;

- "I had to eat ramen again and then our manager called me because they needed me at the company. So, I could not read anything and had to rush to Gangnam. When I got there I found out they didn't really need me and I went out for nothing!";

- "THE AMOUNT OF DISRESPECT!";

- "The manager thought I needed to sign some paperwork but ends out that I already did that and that he got confused!";

- Insert clip of Lemongrab screaming "UNACCEPTABLE!";

- Suns are trying to be sympathetic but the whole story is so funny that it's impossible not to laugh;

- "Then, back at the dorm, I kicked Ari out of our room to finally read but, when I opened the book, I got an email from one of my professors saying that I didn't hand my assignment and that could cost me some important points for the final exam. I panicked because I could perfectly remember myself mailing the project!" she explains, while making her braid even messier playing with it;

- "And after twenty minutes of pure dread I get another email saying that I did, in fact, handed my assignment and that it just got lost in the inbox of my professor... I felt like I lost five years of my life";

- Yueliang was reading comments when someone said "you should go out with your friends to relax!" and she nearly swore;

- "God knows that I tried! I texted the '96 line suggesting we go out for dinner" she explains, "but it was impossible to agree on where to go and we spent ONE HOUR debating on which restaurant was the best! Everyone had a different opinion and they did not want to do anything else. It was their way or no way. I ended up giving up. I was so tired and so stressed that I decided to stay at the dorm"

- Stressed Yueliang is stressed;

- "So I decided to just stay in my room and read but... our neighbors upstairs decided it was the right moment to move all their furniture! Also, it did not help that I had "Fireflies" by NCT Dream stuck in my head! In particular Jaemin sunbaenim part! I couldn't concentrate on anything and it was literally driving me insane!";

- She looks so cute even when she is exhausted;

- Suns were ready to brighten her mood so they started sharing funny stories and, at the end of the vLive, Yueliang was smiling happily;

- "It has been a rough day but thanks to our Suns now I feel recharged! Thank you for being here to support me, I love you so much!";

[sweetfierceimagines]

Truth is everybody is going to hurt you: you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.

Request by @finnofamerica, thank you so much !! 

Steve Harrington x Reader with some major Billy Hargrove involvement ! 

Summary : Reader is Billy’s sister, she usually gets in the way when he tries to beat people up, because she would rather get hurt than see anyone else in pain. She gets in the way when Billy wants to fight with Steve and he ends up locking her out. She has to find a place. Wink Wink. 

/ I’m currently writing the imagines I was requested before carrying on those I started ! I think it’ll be nice to carry on the two previous ones, right? Keep sending me requests, I'm dying for everything related to Stranger Things but not only !! / 

Warnings : violence, angst. 

* 

You don’t chose your family, right. You only have one, so take care of it. Y/N was Billy Hargrove’s little sister, blood related. She always had a very good relation with him, she understood and truly loved him, but lately, he became quite dark. He was the shadow of himself : violent, angry, he had no patience and didn’t care for anything else but his own instant pleasure. He always hated Max, as she was reminding him constantly that he was no longer living in a happy and loving family. Nevertheless, he always kept his angst away from Y/N. Until now. 

He would never willingly hit her, he never beat her up by choice, but she would get in the way, and sometimes she took a few punches on someone else’s behalf.  She couldn’t stand when Billy was getting violent for no reason, when he was beating up someone that stood no chance of winning. She hated when it was unfair and unjustified. Problem is, lately he was alway being unfair. 

It was Saturday, Y/N was driving to the arcade to pick Max up. She was late, very late, and Y/N though that Billy would have drove off a while ago. She parked and got out of the car, going in the building and looking everywhere for Max. She sighted, not finding her. 

- Hey! Y/N! If you’re looking for Mad Max she left with the kids and Hair Harrington about 10 minutes ago. 

- Thanks Keith, I appreciate it. You have any idea where they went? 

The man shook his head while eating chips, and he went back to his activities. Y/N went back to her car and sighted again, thinking about where they could have left. 

In the end, she decided to drive to each of the kids’ house. She started by Dustin, nope. Then Lucas, nope. Then Mike, nope. When she was parking in front of Will’s house, she started to really get pissed off. She was angry at Max for not waiting, for not thinking about her and Billy, but she would never act like her brother. She spotted Steve’s car and smiled, relieved. She got out, knocked at the door and was welcomed by Steve. 

- Steve, where is Max? 

The boy looked shocked, like he was expecting her to say hello and kiss him or something. He just opened the door and let her in. She stormed in, finding Max siting on the couch with Lucas by her side, casually chatting. When the girl met her eyes, she stood up and opened her mouth to say something, probably apologies, but Y/N stopped her by raising her hand. 

- Don’t. We’ll talk about it later, we have to go home. I can’t believe you do that same mistake each time Maxy, for real you know what it generated, don’t you? Come on, quickly now !! 

She barely looked at the others and headed toward the door, Max following her closely, when she heard some engines, apparently coming from someone driving fast and abruptly. 

- Shit. 

Y/N looked at Max, the kid panicking instantly, knowing that it was Billy and that he would not be bothered by the people around. 

- I’m so sorry Y/N, so sorry ! Please, don’t let him hurt them.. 

Y/N shook her head and paused, looking at the kids inside the house. Yep, they didn’t stand a chance, and honestly neither did Steve. They had to leave now, and drag him away from the group. 

- Ok, come with me. We’ll try not to make it public. 

She opened the door and went for her car, ignoring Billy almost running at them with an extremely angry face. She told Max to get in the car and not get out, and she opened the driver’s door, being instantly stopped by her brother. He shut the door violently, keeping his left hand on it and using the right one to turn her around. 

- Y/N, I swear this kid is challenging or something! You see it hu? You see it don’t you?!? She’s fucking trying to get me in trouble with dad! 

- Billy, I know how you feel. Look, let’s go back to the house and we’ll talk about it ok? I’ve told her already that she’s screwing up, let me handle this ok? Hey.. hey !! 

Billy was trying to listen, but he just couldn’t when he was looking in Max’s eyes and she would just look at him like he was a monster. SHE was the one late, right? SHE was the one not obeying the rules, right?? And every time SHE lied or got late, it was falling back on him, and he was NOT having it. He went for her door, opening it and dragging her out of the car. Y/N’s yells didn’t do anything. 

- Now, you shitty brat, you know what happens when you disobey?? You know it don’t you?? 

- Hey, Hargrove. Quit your drama would you? 

Y/N turned around, seing Steve walking toward them. There was one thing Billy hated more than Max, and it was Steve fucking Harrington. He let go of Max and walked to him. 

- What now King Harrington? I get it than you like to babysit them, that’s the only thing you’re sort of good at, but time’s out, fuck off. 

- No, I won’t. Seriously man, you’re going to hit a child? Really? That’s fucked up, I won’t let you. 

- You won’t let me? You won’t let me?? You don’t tell me what I can and can’t do Harrington! 

And on that he punched first, starting to unravel his anger on Steve’s face and body. At this point everyone was out, looking at them, unable to do anything. Max was terrified, screaming and looking for something to hit Billy with. But there was nothing. Y/N stopped yelling, and did the only thing she knew she could do : get in the way. She tried to push Billy back with no success, so she warned him, yelling that she would get in between. Somehow, Steve managed to stand up and he even gave a few punches himself. Y/N took the opportunity to get in between just has she warned, and instead of punching Steve’s face, he hit Y/N’s. The strength of it knocked her for a few seconds, but she stood still, staying there. 

- Y/N ! Get away, it’s not about you! 

- No! You don’t get to beat people up like that! Our family is a mess, everyone thinks we’re crazy, you’re not helping! I’m done with that, get yourself together!! 

- FUCK OFF Y/N! 

He raised his hand, threatening her, but she didn’t move. His face got more and more frightening, and she knew it would not end there, but as for now he went to his car and drove back to their house, probably risking to kill himself on the way. 

* 

- Maxy. Get in the car. I trust your friends with taking care of Steve.. and we’re both very sorry for everything. Please don’t encourage Max to be late again, ok? 

Nobody said anything and they both got back in the car. At some point, Y/N just changed her mind and got out of the car, Max following her. 

- Hey, could one of you have Max for the night? I think she would need a little pyjama party, what do you think love? 

Y/N smiled at the kid. Poor Max had always known this Billy, and it broke her heart to imagine that she would probably never get the loving brother she deserved. Max smiled, running in her harms and thanking her. She was shaking, Y/N holding her very tight to give her at least a bit of affection. Mike suggested to host the pyjamas party, saying he had a spear bed. Like that, Y/N drove back alone to the Hargrove house. The door was locked, and she had to bang for at least ten minutes to raise Billy’s attention. He opened, shirtless and clearly drunk. He scoffed and got out of the house, holding the keys in his hand. 

- Y/N, Y/N, Y/N...You know, I liked you, before. Now you just became a fucking brat like Max. She’s not even our sister !! She’s just causing trouble! She’s causing trouble to us both!! Why are you always standing by HER side, and NEVER MINE? 

- Billy, she is our sister, she’s not the reason why mom left ok, and dad is messed up, it’s not your fault! Or mine! Or HER’s!! Don’t you see? You’re acting just like him.. I know you’re better than that.. please be better than that.. 

- You’re NOT LISTENING ! You’re NEVER by my side.. you abandoned me.. Like them all.. You know what? Whatever, go with her, she’s your burden now. 

Just before closing the door he yelled, hurt apparent in his voice,

- And you’re not welcomed here tonight, fuck off. She’s not sleeping here, you’re not. 

He locked the door and left her standing here, night falling on the city. She went back to her car, looking for her wallet. She clearly didn’t have enough money to get a room, not even in the worst highway motel she knew. She didn’t want Max to worry, so she wouldn’t go to Mike’s. She was way too ashamed to ask the Wheelers for help. This didn’t leave many options. She sighted, starting to drive and stopped in front of Steve’s house. She got out, standing in front of the door. 

- Oh shit.. what the hell am I doing here? His parents probably know it’s all my brother’s doing.. Hi miss and mister Harrington, mind if I sleep at your place a couple hours after your son nearly got disfigured by my dear bro? I’m pathetic.. 

Y/N tried to walk back to her car, feeling helpless, when she heard the door open. Steve was standing there, his face bad but not as bad as she imagined. 

- Hey, Steve.. It’s a bit embarrassing but.. 

- Let me guess, Billy is a dick. He kicked you out, you don’t want to stress Max, you have nowhere to go? 

- That’s about it, yes. 

Steve smiled, and then started to laugh when he saw Y/N’s mortified face. 

- Come in, would you? 

Y/N couldn’t believe it. She got in the house, taking her shoes off not to mess anything up, and took off her coat. She shyly followed Steve who was getting in the kitchen. He pointed her a seat and took two plates, filling them with the meal he was preparing. 

- Wow, thanks.. I don’t know if I deserve that.

- You’re kidding me right? You stood up to him, you protected your sister, and you even protected me, Y/N. He punched you! You have a bruise, look at you.. so don’t you dare putting any guilt on your shoulders. It’s his fault ok? You’re not responsible for his doing. And you’ve been very courageous. 

He smiled softly and tried to wink, his swollen eye reacting and making him wince in pain. Y/N couldn’t help but laugh, and she looked at him with a sweet smile. 

- Never knew you were a kind boy Harrington, guess it’s surprises’ day today. 

He pretended to bow down and laughed a bit. They ate, talking about how Billy had become so violent, Steve not believing that he actually used to being sweet and loving to her. She told him about their life in California, about how they did every prank on earth together, and how shitty his father made him. They talked a bit about Steve too, his family being messed up in another way. At some point Steve looked at the clock and stood up. 

- Man! It’s 1am, we’ve talked for hours.. 

Y/N smiled to herself, looking at him taking the plates, cleaning the kitchen up and being careful toward her, asking if she wanted to drink something, to get dessert or to make a call. She kindly refused and yawned. 

- Actually, if you don’t mind I would love to go to sleep.. 

- Oh yeah! Of course! My parents are not there but they literally locked their door, that’s how much they trust me.. Hum.. you know what, I'll just sleep on the couch and you take my room, ok? 

Y/N furrowed her eyebrows and strongly shook her head. 

- No ! You’re serious? You might have broken bones, YOU sleep in your bed and me on the couch, I'm lucky you’re even letting me in. 

- No, no no no no, you’re my guest! 

- Steve, for real.. 

Steve made a few steps, holding Y/N by her shoulders and looked at her in the eyes, trying to convince her. 

- There’s no way! You took a fucking PUNCH for me Y/N.. I can’t stand that he got violent toward you, and even less to protect me.. Please, please let me repay you with my damn bed.. 

Y/N understood that Steve really cared about that, that he was feeling extra grateful toward her, and consequently guilty. She nodded and put a hand on his torso, slowly drawing circles to calm him down. 

- Ok Harrington. We have a deal. We both sleep in this bed of yours so no-one get’s to break his or her back, good? Good! 

She didn’t give him any time to react and walked to what she guessed was his bedroom. She looked around, scanning the place and going in the bathroom to look at her face. She took an aid kit to disinfect her little wound and went back to the room, sitting on the bed next to Steve. By reflex she started to take care of his face, knowing exactly what to do. Billy had always been a stubborn and bold kid, and he used to hurting himself all the time. Steve was wincing, causing Y/N to smile and even laugh a little. 

- Oh, come on, that can’t be that bad.. 

- Oh, really? 

Steve took some alcohol on a cotton ball and patted her wound, her reaction instant as she let out a squeal. Steve burst out laughing, falling on the bed. Y/N laughed a bit and gently kicked him, pretending she was getting irritated. 

- That was just a reflex! I don’t like to get touched out of nowhere like that ! 

She realized the double meaning of her sentence and stood up, the proximity on the bed suddenly feeling a bit too much. Steve got up a little, holding himself by his elbows and tried a seducing look. 

- Maybe next time I'll warn you then. 

And he winked again, laughing a bit. Truth is he pretended It was sarcasm, when it was all he ever wanted since she got to that city. He stood up and took an old oversize shirt from his wardrobe. 

- I don’t think I have any pants that would fit you.. This is the most appropriate thing I have. I’ll take a quick shower ok? You can take one too. 

Y/N lied on the bed, looking at the ceiling and trying to get herself together. 

- Hey.. Y/N? 

Y/N opened her eyes and stood up quickly, apologizing in reflex. Steve smiled and stood up too, explaining that she fell asleep while he was taking his shower and that he’d rather wake her up now so she could take a relaxing shower before bed. She nodded and went to the bathroom. As she was about to close the door she stopped and glanced at Steve. He though the door was closed already and was looking for a pyjama. He threw a few on his bed, apparently not pleased with the designs. She heard him mumble some “no, that’s not nice.. what the hell, I can’t wear that right? God, she’s going to think I'm a baby..”. She covered her mouth so he couldn’t hear her laugh, and though to herself it was the cutest thing ever. In the end he opted for shorts and a white shirt, loosing down the towel he had around his waist. Y/N nearly banged the door out of surprise and felt the heat rise to her cheeks. She ran in the shower, enjoying the hot water and relaxing her muscles. 

When she got back in the room she noticed Steve was shirtless. She knew for sure he selected a shirt, right? So why the hell was he lying there, shorts his only clothing? She furrowed her brows a little but didn’t say anything, afraid of revealing that she peaked out at him. He looked up at her, blushing a little. He looked at her from top to bottom, not even trying to hide how he was checking her out. 

- You wear it better than me, that’s for sure.. 

Y/N suddenly realized that the oversized shirt was barely covering her thighs and quickly got in the bed, covering her legs with the sheets. He did the same and turned around to give her some space. As he turned off the light he mumbled a “goodnight” barely audible. 

After ten minutes of turning around again and again, he whispered. 

- Hey.. Y/N, you’re asleep? 

- Mhhhhh.. no. Difficult when I have a storm happening next to me. 

She said with sarcasm, turning around to face him. Even if the light was turned off she could see his face. She smiled at him, scanning his features. 

- What’s bothering you, Steve? You need to sleep.. 

- I don’t know.. I guess I can’t stand the fact that you.. out of everyone.. got hurt. 

He caressed her cheek, only using the tip of his fingers not to hurt her even more. His  fingers lingered, tracing all her features with extreme care and sweetness. When he brushed her lips, he realized he had been holding his breath, and so was she. Y/N didn’t lose a second of this moment, shivering to his touch. She saw all the passion and lust into his eyes, the genuine adrenaline rushing through all his body, and she knew exactly how he was feeling, as she was experiencing the exact same thing. 

She shifted a bit, getting slightly closer to him. Steve though to himself that looking like that, there was no way she could be interested in him. He took his hand away, not wanting to make her uncomfortable, but she put her hand on his, keeping it in place. 

Finally, she made the move and stood up a little, connecting her lips to his. It was just a sweet kiss, a few seconds longs, to show that she was not playing him. When she broke the kiss she brushed his cheek with a smile and placed her hand in his hair. 

- Well.. It was not my intention to get beat up to attract you in this bed, but I'm more than happy that it happened.. 

She laughed a bit and just leaned her forehead on his, closing her eyes. 

- It’s the more relaxed I felt in years.. 

- I can’t believe you’re here Y/N, I though you despised me.. you never showed any interest at all.. all this time.. I never gave up you know? 

She was truly moved by this, and she though to herself that she would explain to him later that yes, she always had been interested in him too, but she couldn’t risk to show any interest toward the boy her brother hated the most in Hawkins. 

- Yeah well.. I guess I didn’t have nothing to do that weekend, so I decided to fall in love.. 

- Quoting Hitchcock? Clever girl.. 

And with that she just laid on him, letting him wrap his arms around her to fall asleep in his embrace. 

* 

/ A lot longer than what I was thinking of when I started to write it ! Hope you’ll like it! Tell me what you think and please tell me if you want a second part or anything! Thank you again for the request ! /