#i was so frightened of every character at the start but oh my god i love them all so so much
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just finished the entirety of league of gentlemen in about a week i think my brain is melting
#NEW BRAINROT WOOOOO#i was so frightened of every character at the start but oh my god i love them all so so much#why were the anniversary specials so depressing 😭😭#and honestly why wasn’t dean tavalouris in it more i love him#tlog#the league of gentlemen#i do admit i think i should’ve watched the movie before the specials but oh well that is to come ig
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the fact that someone from seven whole years ago still terrorizes my brain is. it's something. i guess being accused by an 18-19 year old of being a proshipper and abuser multiple times when i was 15 actually did legitimate, long-term, traumatizing psychological damage to me (the night everything went down i hallucinated a full-blown, crystal-clear, terrifying face in the dark, due to the stress). who woulda thought. i don't know. i can't stop thinking about this situation from 2018 and i still just feel this awful fear like i can't escape this. image of myself. that is in people's heads. an image that i'm very different from nowadays. its funny in a bitter kind of way how different i am now, meanwhile last time i checked on this person ey're still doing this exact same thing to other people, just on a smaller scale. i want to heal from this already but my OCD will not let me. i'm stuck in it forever, it seems.
#got accused of dating someone 2 years younger than me because we had some characters get married in tomodachi life#got accused of being genocidal and racist because i said ''i wish there was a world with just me and my friends'' when i was a Child#got accused of being a proshipper because i wrote an angst fankid AU with an abusive rship between two characters i did not ship#got accused of being an abuser because... i don't actually know why. but it was repeated multiple times. i was still. a child.#this all started because i watched a video on transmed stuff and posted some of the talking points and instead of educating me abt it#this person just jumped into accusing me of every single thing ever and when this made me suicidal i got misgendered#and my abusive former school was contacted to report me (i said that this misgendering + borderline doxxing was aggressive)#(which is also racist apparently but i genuinely do not know what else i was supposed to call this behavior)#oh i was also stalked (the person found sideblogs of mine and would read through them) but if i checked to see if i was being posted abt#then i'm the evil stalker racist proshipper abuser who just needs to ''leave their victims alone'' (again i was 15 when this went down)#i dont know. i dont know why i keep thinking about this over and over again so many years later#or why i still have that fear in my chest even though i'm an adult now. i guess the fact that this person could still be thinking abt me#is just. really troubling. i keep thinking of what i could say if i ever had to defend myself again. but i feel like i'd just get scared.#just like every other time. idk. i can't imagine doing this to an 18-19 year old at my age. and i couldnt imagine doing it to a 15 year old#when i was 18-19. and you had the gall to say that i had POWER over you? that i ABUSED you? i wanted to get AWAY from you!!!#god why can't i just heal from this already? why does it still have to make me frightened after all this time? why can't i just LIVE?#evie.txt ♡
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“Ya’ want me to touch ya’ like that?”
(Rivals) Declan O’Hara x Reader
Suggestion by my dearest Miranon🩷 / A budding author, you are introduced to Declan O’Hara by your friend Lizzie, and realise your new book has a profound effect…
18+ FANFIC / SUPER SMUT! Finally some more Declan! Super long, I’m so sorry. Reader character aged at 21. As always, request what you wanna see in my asks 💋
“Bloody hell.” Lizzie Vereker remarks, flipping through pages of your first ever publication. “This is… this is porn!” She speaks through a flustered grin. “Oh God, Lizzie. Don’t say that.” You roll your eyes and tut, anxiously chomping at your fingernails as you intently read her expression. It had been 2 weeks since you had published your first book — something of an erotica. You had recently been taken on by Angler Publishing, Lizzie’s agent. Something to be overjoyed about, but you couldn’t help but be frightened about the public reaction you were to receive.
“Well, I can tell you, it has been quite the hit in Rutshire. I’ve handed out a copy to quite literally everybody I’ve met.” Your foxy-haired companion informed you. A wry smile painted your face, half-petrified by the thought of an entire village dispassionately flicking through your novel. “Well, let’s hope it goes down well.” You sigh.
-
Declan O’Hara, recently unemployed and hopelessly bored, was sat in his arm chair. Lighting a cigarette and huffing out the biggest exhale manageable, he picked up the novel that Lizzie has passed to him in the village shop earlier that week. “What a load of shite.” He quipped to himself as he scanned over the title. Starting the book from halfway through, he happened to land upon one of your more risqué chapters — detailing the most erotic and fantastical scenes. Reaching down to adjust his growing bulge, Declan groaned and spoke into the air, “Fuck me, she’s a dirty girl. Mind of filth.”
It had been a while since he’d been intimate — Maud had took off a few months ago now, with no contact or intention of returning. He was a red-blooded mammal with a carnal instinct, he needed to get his release sooner or later, and it wasn’t going to be over a fucking book. He arose from his chair, closing the book and camouflaging it within his bookshelf. A short snap of the letterbox irritated his ears as he began to stride towards the front door. “The fuck is this?” He asked to himself, bending down to retrieve the small, glossy leaflet that had been pushed through his door. The leaflet advertised your book signing, with a guest appearance from established author Lizzie Vereker herself. “Fuck that.” He rolled his eyes, balling up the leaflet between his palms and tossing it into the paper bin.
-
“Will anyone actually come?” You ask as you watch Lizzie, frantically laying out pens and copies of your book on a fold-up table, carefully prepared outside of the village hall. “Of course!” She lies, wiping sweat from her brow with the back of her arm. Lizzie desperately wanted you to succeed and had personally posted a leaflet through every house door in Rutshire. Whether anyone actually turned up, however, was a different story entirely.
Declan, an ever pessimistic look engrained on his face, began to trudge past the stoned driveway of the village hall, furiously puffing on a cigarette and muttering to himself. “Declan! Declan!” Lizzie began to call, and you immediately rested your head in your hands — today was going to be mortifying. The moustached man appeared to ignore her, but Lizzie would not give up. “Come on Declan, come on Declan.” She shouted, waving him over with every word. The man muttered to himself once more, turned on his heels, and began to walk towards your crudely prepared desk. “Hello, Miss Vereker. How can I help ‘ya today?” He asked, feigning friendliness. You took a quick glance at the man and immediately regretted it. Darkened chocolate hair, rather tedious tweed outfit… but an incredibly intoxicating face. “This is my friend,” Lizzie begins to introduce you, but you chime in with your name and give Declan a small wave, to which he shoots you a small smile.
“I gave you her novel the other day. Did you get a chance to read it?” She asked, speaking in a hushed tone in order to avoid embarrassment.. she knew the answer would most definitely be a no. “I did, actually. I flicked through it last night.” Declan replied, raking a hand over his curled hair. Lizzie looked at you with wildly optimistic eyes, to which you nervously grinned. “Wh-what did you think?” You peeped, clearing your throat immediately after. “You’re quite the little minx, aren’t ya’?” He smirked down at you, avoiding Lizzie’s unsettlingly persistent eye contact. Blushing wildly, you giggle and pick up a novel from the top of your almost-toppling pile. “Care for a signed copy?” You ask, a sanguine smile controlling your mouth. Declan scratched at his beard hesitantly and exhaled thunderously. “Go on then.” Clapping her hands in excitement, Lizzie pushed out a small ‘yay’, and equipped you with a pen. Scribbling your signature into the book, you pushed the copy towards him, keeping one hand on the cover. He repossessed it from you, brushing softly across your hand and smirking at you.
Figuring he may as well take his chance, Declan cleared his throat and pursed his lips in speech. “If ya’ free tonight, why don’t ‘ya come for a drink with me and go into more detail about ya’ filthy book?” A rare smile interrupted his question. “Oh… okay. Where’s good for a drink?” You question, flipping your hair to one side. “Ah, nowhere around here. Lizzie’ll tell ya’ which my house is. If you’re comfortable, I’m free tonight.” He murmurs, turning around and walking away from the table.
“Fuck. Me. Lizzie. He is gorgeous.” You groan, rubbing your hands over your eyes. You couldn’t have been more embarrassed at how you handled the situation. “Oh God, Declan? No, no. Dirty.” Lizzie grimaced, turning her nose up at Mr O’Hara.
-
Some few hours after what seemed to be a semi-successful public appearance, you lay on your bed in solitude. Declan hadn’t left your mind the entire day. After some careful consideration, you decided to at least visit him for a very quick, very small drink. Curling your intricately long eyelashes and swiping gloss over your lips, you scanned yourself in your dressing table mirror — chestnut hair curled delicately and a tight floral dress hugging your curves, accessorised with a delicate pearl necklace and earrings. Taking a quick glimpse at the scrawled address that Lizzie had written for you, you begin to make the bitterly cold journey to The Priory.
Gently knocking on the front door of the luxurious country home, you waited nervously and replayed your earlier conversation in your head — unpicking on every stutter and incorrect word. “Oh. I didn’t think you were gonna come.” Declan spoke as he opened the door. Not quite the grand entrance you were expecting. “Oh, I’m so sorry. I just thought-“ You begin to panic, instantaneously blushing and backing away from the door. After a few painfully uncomfortable seconds, Declan allowed himself a stifled chuckle as he extended the door to let you in. “Ahh, I’m just jokin’. Come in. Lounge is the first door on the right.”
Taking a demure seat on his sofa, you kept your hands bunched up in your lap, afraid of taking up too much space. “What do ya’ drink? Whiskey? Vodka?” He bellowed from the kitchen, voice overcome only by the sound of glasses chinking against each other. “A vodka and lemonade will do, thank you.” You smile, watching intently as Declan entered the living room, pouring out two drinks with a trembling hand. “Did you really like the book?” You ask, pulling your cigarette case from your petite, leather clutch bag and lighting it. Declan followed suit, and subsequently swiped the signed copy of your novel from his coffee table, opening it a quarter way through and reading a sentence aloud.
•
“Alice howled in intense sexual gratification as Edward swirled his fingertips across her swollen clitoris,” Declan began, voice assertive and proud, “Jesus Christ, how are ya’ even allowed to publish this?” He asked, barking out a laugh. Rubbing your lips together in self-consciousness. Declan took note of your diffidence and halted his laughter, coughing brashly from the fumes of his cigarette and reading the next sentence of your book inwardly. “Sorry. I, uh… didn’t mean ta’ embarrass ‘ya.” He sighs, as you knock back the entirety of your vodka. “Can I have another, please?” You ask, and Declan obliges, filling more than half the glass with vodka, and replicating the insane measurement in his own.
“It’s erotica, Declan. It’s very popular. Really, it reflects all of one’s needs and desires.” You tut, tucking a strand of chocolate hair behind your left ear. Halfway through a mouthful of vodka, Declan paused and glared at you. It was the first time he had noticed you — really noticed you. The hopeful glint in your lazuline eyes, the gentle undulations of your shapely figure, the sultry pursing of your reddened lips. Your cheeks glowed the most charming shade of rose as the vodka coursed through your veins. “So, what are your needs and desires?” He whispered, voice gravelly and coarse. “Read the next line.” You hush, taking another large swig of your drink. “Her wetness coated his fingers and his erection grew at the smell of her.” He reads, shifting himself in his seat uncomfortably. “It’s how every woman wants to be touched.” You whisper, inching closing to him and resting your head on your hand.
“Ya’ want me to touch ya’ like that?” Declan growled, pulling your knees apart gently and creeping his hand up your thigh. The heat emanating from your pussy made him grunt in pleasure. Shuffling slightly to allow your dress to ride up to the top of your thighs, Declan pulled at your knee once more until your legs were widely spread. He brought his finger to your clit and gasped, “No pants? Fuckin’ dirty girl.” You softly bite your bottom lip at his words. Nimbly swirling circles around your pink clit, you felt yourself dripping in excitement. You panted desperately at your heightened sensitivity. “Does that feel good?” He asked, delving two fingers inside you and moaning at your constriction around him. You squeaked out the smallest yes possible, pleasure making it impossible to formulate coherent sentences.
Removing his fingers from you and standing up, Declan unbuttoned his shirt to reveal his wildly hairy chest. Gazing at him with adoring eyes, you watched as he unzipped his trousers and pulled his boxers from his ankles. Sitting back down on the sofa and motioning for you to copy, you pulled your floral dress over your head and off — substantially large breasts bouncing through the rhythm. Grabbing your hand and pulling you onto his lap, Declan fervidly crashed your lips together in lust — tongue fighting it’s way into yours and hand reaching up to grab a tight handful of your left breast. Desperate for friction, you began to grind your clit against his firm cock, moans escaping through the gaps of your kiss.
Grabbing your petite waist, Declan hoisted you up slightly and lowered you back down onto his cock. A powerful groan left your lips, your pussy slowly stretching open over his girth. Moving his hands to grab handfuls of your area, flesh spilling between his fingers, he bounced you up and down, his head lulling back in pleasure. “Declan, you’re so fucking big.” You exclaim, steadying yourself on his shoulders. “Am I breaking ya’, my girl?” He grunted into your ear, setting the pace of a madman. The way he could so easily raise you up and down created the most powerful knots in your stomach. “Yes, and it feels so fucking good.” You moan.
Feeling you clench tighter around him, Declan moaned under his breath and released his hand, allowing you to set your own pace. Uncontrollable with ardour, you bounce on his cock with a frantic pace, evermore spurred on by his lustful reaction. “Keep goin’, my girl. I’m gonna fuckin’ cum inside ya’.” The Irishman grunted, keeping his hands by his side and allowing you to ride him to release. “Fuck, Declan. Cum for me. I want it so fucking bad.”
Lowering his head to take a nipple into his mouth, Declan moved his right hand to wrap around your waist, thrusting into you sloppily as he neared his ecstasy. “Are ya’ fuckin’ ready for it?” He asked, cock already twitching in anticipation. You nod lazily, losing control of your function. Grunting carnally as he shot his hot ropes of cum inside you, his grip around your waist tightened and you both panted together, relieved and exhausted. Slowly, lifting yourself from him, Declan watched as his seed dripped from your entrance — a successful symbol of your lovemaking.
“You look so fuckin’ good with my cum inside ‘ya.” He smirked, playing a firm smack on your arse. This would most definitely not be the last time you saw each other…
#rivals#rivals fanfic#rivals fanfiction#declan i fancy u <3#declan o’hara x reader#declan o’hara#declan o hara#aidan turner#my own dreadful writing
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if you ever wanted to hear my every thought on fitzier you're in luck because here it is! this is extremely long so it's going under the cut and if you read it all, i love you
fitzier- shame, performance, and the freeing ordeal of being known
oh man okay here we go everyone, if this sucks or is too stupid or too anything feel free to kill me
essentially what i want to try to convey here is that the reason crozier and fitzjames go from enemies to friends to lovers is because they both see each other and see themselves in each other in a way that frightens and compels them, hence the early enmity with a tinge of familiarity and desperation to connect thrown in. with the inevitable evolution of their relationship i really think it becomes about learning to be vulnerable with one another, to give each other space to be who they need to be, both to each other and their subordinates, and finally coming to a point where fitzjames, the most performative insecure character in the story (to me), bares his entire soul to crozier, whose own character development allows him to give james the gift of acceptance and compassion in that moment. i’m not going to go episode by episode like i did with my joplittle post but this is more or less in chronological order with maybe a few exceptions idk i get possessed when i write this stuff
the first scene we’ve got to look at is of course the dinner scene. james is absolutely showboating like no other in this scene but in his body language you can see he isn’t confident at all- fidgeting, gesturing, exaggerating, the voice he tends to put on in early episodes prevalent. but when crozier interrupts him you can see for a split second that james was actually excited to get attention from him until he realizes what he’s saying. in the early episodes james craves crozier’s attention and approval so badly because he knows that crozier doesn’t bullshit and he sees things for what they are and isn’t afraid to voice that either and despite the fact that this sometimes makes james uncomfortable as it is not in line with victorian ideals of emotional expression and masculinity, i think james, given the kind of man he is at the start of the story, craves the recognition of a man who he knows would see everything in him. early early early foreshadowing and story weaving for the cairn scene where he realizes “he can tell this man anything. it is possible”
what i also find fascinating about early james and francis is that they still refer to one another in a very familiar way despite the fact that they openly dislike each other- it’s always first name basis even when they’re arguing. also interesting to note that crozier in the beginning will often call him “fitzjames” in front of others when he’s discussing him when he’s not in the room, but later on he makes sure to always use his proper title when he’s talking about him in front of the men- showing james respect even when he dislikes him. i think he doesn’t understand at the time that james’s familiarity with him is an attempt at respect as well (the whole ‘don’t ever call me francis again’ scene). it might be a stretch but i do get the sense that from the very beginning they both tried at being friendly, even just for the sake of maintaining order in command.
when francis says “here technology still bends the knee to luck james” in ep 1 he says it with almost a mentor-like cadence. like yeah they’re both being a little bitchy here but god knows franklin wasn’t giving fitzjames any real or pertinent advice about surviving and navigating the fucking arctic so i find it interesting that crozier almost gently reminds him that yeah they’re making decent progress but that it would be foolish to let their guard down
one of my favorite early fitzier scenes is after dinner when crozier, franklin, and fitzjames are all on deck and fitzjames like sidles up to crozier and looks him up and down and just goes “goodnight francis” with that smirk on his face- he was trying so hard to flirt with him while also being an insufferable bitch with “try to shake the brown study”. but also james lingers so long waiting for francis to say something to him and then shakes his head and walks away to go bitch to franklin about him- i think he is truly hurt in this instance along with being angry and annoyed. and i love that complication because on one hand, i do think that fitzjames thinks that crozier owes him friendship or at the very least recognition because of who james believes himself to be, or at least who he’s trying to be- like he DOES probably see crozier as being beneath him as an irishman but i do think he genuinely wants his friendship and approval as well, for self serving reasons but not entirely. it’s about fitzjames and his desire to be seen by everyone around him in a certain light but also about his desire to be seen specifically by crozier because of who crozier is and how he acts in contrast to everyone else around them
next on the agenda is “dramatic opening shot”... fitzjames girl you are the most dramatic man in the fucking room. the projection is crazy. what this scene reveals most importantly i think is that another thing about francis that james is secretly very envious of is his ability to openly disagree with franklin. there are so many moments later on where you can see that james doesn’t fully believe in what franklin is saying or commanding (the way he looks at him when they realize they are trapped in the pack, the ways he looks at him when he tells fitzjames to escort silna off of erebus right after her father has died) and i think that he envies francis’s ability to challenge franklin and not care what the consequences are. anyway the staredown during this scene is crazy, the tension??
moving on… beginning of ep 1 crozier says “not if fitzjames is with us” in reference to jop saying dinner will be over before he knows it, and at the beginning of ep 2 fitzjames says “do you think francis will honor us with his presence today”- for two people who allegedly hate each other they sure do think about each other and find reasons to bring each other up in conversation a lot!
ahh the scene with silna’s father- fitzjames is so interesting to me in this scene and really illustrates one of my favorite things about him in the earlier episodes which is that when he goes silent his face journeys are amazing and really convey his true feelings that he won’t say out loud for various reasons. he watches crozier so much in this scene and looks to him for understanding and guidance which is also interesting because i do think that in this scene he’s watching silna, a woman who he probably sees as subhuman and alien, reacting with such grief and tenderness to her father’s death and probably thinking of his relationship with his own father. i know a lot of people speculate that he was just feeling empathy for her there and i do think that’s part of it but i think that to show that in his mind would be to out himself as being “not fully english”. i think i make this point later on in the story too but fitzjames really does that classic white supremacist thing of distancing yourself from “otherness” in order to align yourself with imperialist beliefs and status- he does it with silna and he does it with crozier. sorry this is also turning into my fitzjames character study lol.
the scene where crozier walks out after his big blow up with franklin… i get that james really didn’t have any place to try to hide the fact that he was eavesdropping but i find it so interesting that he decides to turn to face francis and look him directly in the eye. from what we can see of his expression i personally think there was at least a small amount of sympathy there. another attempt to extend friendship and familiarity while actively participating in crozier’s humiliation… god i hate him lol. and the face that james is making when francis first walks out before he turns around is contemplative, not like smug or triumphant or anything like we might expect given how much he seems to dislike crozier at this point. and francis looking back at him… there’s no anger there, just sadness and humiliation and it sucks. i would truly do anything to be able to see james’s face there, in the script it says that crozier can tell how much james heard from the look on his face which like??? could mean so much.
okay the face journey when francis walks into the erebus wardroom after sir john dies… his eyes stay on fitzjames who’s obviously extremely distraught and i wonder if crozier has ever seen fitzjames show genuine emotion up until this point? crozier then looks to blanky, who also looks to fitzjames almost as if to say “look at him, attend to him” and the sorrow and vulnerability on francis’s face when he looks again to james who is of course also showing a vulnerability we haven’t seen from him before. i love the note in the script that fitzjames isn’t used to being this candid or vulnerable in front of a man he doesn’t respect but he does it anyway. and i don’t think he knows how much sympathy crozier does have for him despite how callous he may come across when he says to send out the rescue parties. they both just fail so spectacularly at communication and expression early on, it’s crazy to see
when francis begins reading from the eulogy and stumbles over his words fitzjames gives him a very sharp look… i think he clocks his alcoholism starting to really affect him right away but may also be looking to see if the stumble is due to emotion or the alcohol. ugh and the look he gives him at the end too… it’s so piercing and there’s an anger to it as well. almost a “please prove me wrong but i don’t believe at this point that you will”. because for better or worse now they are linked, intertwined, married and they have to find a way to make it work.
ohhhh the fitzier dinner scene my beloved… “as i climbed the ridge” is such a parallel to james’s chinese sniper story scene!! AND this time it’s fitzjames who derisively interrupts crozier. The parallels, the callbacks… the look he gives fitzjames is crazy when fitzjames says “you should curb that for now” but what i find the most interesting about this scene is that the script makes a point to say that fitzjames was being sincere when he said that to crozier- there is care and concern there underneath the frustration and anger. and then it’s also wild that in that moment, fitzjames clearly reminds crozier of sophia. the way the narrative almost shifts to replace crozier’s love interest (sophia) with his burgeoning relationship with fitzjames is soooooo. i just love this scene because they are both trying so hard to be vulnerable and open with one another but they are both failing so spectacularly just like in the scene after sir john dies. they don’t have the respect and rapport between them yet to back up what they desperately want from each other- a connection. a camaraderie. leadership and capability. fitzjames tries to be sincere in his concern for francis but it is overshadowed by his frustration and anger towards what he views to be a sour outlook from crozier, and crozier attempts to be vulnerable with james by sharing about sophia only to be met with the knowledge that franklin has humiliated him yet again by discussing that topic with other people aboard the ship. and i think fitzjames does truly pity francis in that moment but it also frustrates him that that is the reason he’s here, for love, not for a yearning for adventure or glory- which i would venture to say is why fitzjames is there. fitzjames went on the expedition to prove his worth and francis went for love and they both ended up finding exactly those things from one another i’m dead.
oh and also why the fuck does fitzjames arch his slutty back against the wall when francis walks out of the room like that one scene in hannibal y’all know what i’m talking about. okay and i forgot about the way fitzjames jabs his finger at francis all up in his personal space which is just so unlike him. it is also worth noting that francis doesn’t get angry at this- he actually stills for a second and then continues to tell james what he was going to tell him. again there’s that strange familiarity they have despite the fact that they hate each other at this point. and that’s to say nothing of how they’re sitting in the first place which is so close to each other idk it just seems a little crazy to me?
i also find it so so interesting how james chooses to be honest with francis once he accidentally reveals that franklin discussed the whole sophia thing with him- he could’ve deflected and said like “oh yeah he mentioned it in passing’ or something like that but he chose to tell francis the truth of the conversation! francis really brings out an honest and candid side to james that we don’t see him put on for anyone else and i think it’s because deep down he knows that no matter how shitty, francis is always going to respect being told the truth vs. all of the obfuscating language that is so typical of the time. i think this is also why in the next episode francis insists that everyone leaves after he punches fitzjames and fitzjames is very resigned to it as well- they both know that it’s going to be ugly but they both want to hash out the truth of the situation for better or worse- like yeah they are at each other’s throats and they want the catharsis of screaming at each other because they’re so mad at each other here but i also think they crave honesty and candidness in their interactions- james because he feels like a fake and francis because it’s his nature- but both because it’s what they want from each other. and back to the dinner scene- just another look of genuine hurt from fitzjames when crozier says “keep your pity” plus the whole reason crozier even says that- i don’t think he expects pity from anyone at this point and doesn’t know how to respond to it.
in the scene where fitzjames says they should question silna about the creature crozier makes a point to say he agrees with him- he does this a couple of different times throughout the show and i think it’s a very small but important detail about how even when they aren’t on the best terms he makes sure to show james respect in front of the officers. and like yeah they end up yelling at each other here but i think that’s more james’s grief showing (again he shows emotion in front of/because of francis) and francis’s stress showing as well- that “we’re all exhausted” is very aimed at james but also an attempt to explain his own state of mind. they’re trying!!!!
the lashing scene- i don’t think we’ve ever seen fitzjames actually afraid of crozier but he definitely is here. he’s clenching his hands so hard throughout the whole scene and he keeps glancing at crozier as he allows the lashing to go on and even nervously gulps at one point. i think this along with crozier’s worsening addiction is a huge catalyst for where we find them and their dynamic in ep 5.
and speaking of which- at the beginning of the episode you can really see how their communication has just completely broken down. edward is basically bridging the gap between them and the resentment is growing. i know that the alcoholism is part of it, we can only assume that fitzjames started to keep his distance once he could tell it was getting bad, but i also think a lot of this is fall out from the lashing and how it affected the way fitzjames felt about crozier as stated earlier. and another aspect of the widening gap between fitzjames and crozier is how erebus is the very picture of order while terror is literally and figuratively falling apart
the fact that fitzjames told collins to watch out for crozier running out of alcohol on terror is further evidence that fitzjames was around a bit to witness crozier’s alcoholism getting really bad and isolated himself after that. he’s angry but he knows it was coming
ugh man the fight scene- the fact that james came himself, alone, to terror to talk to francis as a friend (straight from his own mouth in the script of their argument) about the alcohol issue. even though james is furious and stressed and shouldering the whole expedition, he still attempts to care for francis, it just ends up blowing up in his face and that’s when he lashes out. the way he says “francis” at first before crozier freaks out on him is in such a sincere and gentle tone and just the fucking genuine hurt in his face and his tone of voice when francis tells him to never call him by his first name again. fitzjames cared when francis was at his fucking lowest but still held him responsible and that’s love baby.
the body language is crazy when they’re yelling at each other or i guess when fitzjames is reading francis lol- and the way crozier can’t take his eyes off fitzjames when he’s telling everyone to get out. he’s so ready for this fucking throw down because both of them have been holding this in for so long. crozier is amped up but fitzjames is resigned to finally getting it all out in the open. he wants it to happen and he knows it needs to. even after getting punched in the mouth by him (i don’t think it’s any accident that fitzjames literally bears a scar from that punch and that it comes back open when he’s dying of scurvy) fitzjames still calmly tells everyone yes get out and says what he needs to say. i love the transcript of their argument because it’s so brutal but it really illustrates a kind of fucked up intimacy that we aren’t 100% privy to between them. crozier knows exactly what to say to james to hurt him- telling him he doesn’t have friends, he has admirers and that james has always been mad that he isn’t one, that james is a coward despite the fact that james is facing this down no matter what it takes in order to literally save crozier’s life; and james knows that all he can do is soldier through and lay the truth of what is happening on francis in a way no one else has dared to except for silna minutes before. james really goes out of his comfort zone- being honest and sincere and vulnerable for the sake of the expedition but also for francis. and i’m reading this back and wondering if i’m being too generous to james here but tbh he had every right to be this angry at francis at this point in the story!
ha fitzjames walks into the “i need to dry out meeting” looking all submissive and contrite… but for real his face is so open and entreating in this scene. he’s still annoyed but he wants so badly for things to go right. and you can see in francis’s expression that he is so ashamed to have to ask him
mmm and part of fitzjames coming to love and respect crozier is seeing jopson’s devotion to him in this scene… he’s never seen crozier be admired the way franklin was and i think this is a whole new way for him to see him. and just in general here i think that james “reshuffles everything he thought about the man” and he admires crozier for the way he put his humility and vulnerability in front of him finally and admitted to his wrongs, something i also don’t think franklin would ever do and didn’t ever do, to his and the entire crew’s demise. fitzjames followed franklin and looked up to him in the pursuit of his own vanity and the narrative he tells himself to cover the shame, but he learns to respect and love francis because he watches his evolution as a captain and as a man without any of the obfuscating that he’s used to from authority figures. he watches francis claw his way out of his own shame, the shame that drives him forward and i wonder what kind of ideas that gave fitzjames and how it influenced his own decision to share everything about his past with francis later
what i love about the opening scene of ep 6 is that we see how fitzjames’s leadership has been influenced by franklin and francis but specifically how he is acting more like francis- he does do a little bit of the whole “how dare you bring up anything unpleasant” thing when he yells at jirv for mentioning the number of men and when he does the whole “oh it’s just winter, we’ll feel better with the first sunrise, encourage the men with that” thing but it’s interesting because although we’re hearing echoes of franklin here, fitzjames is still trying to be more honest and open to feedback than franklin was. he doesn’t exactly take jirv’s advice on rationing but he does ration a bit. he is doing the whole toxic positivity thing with his “use that to encourage the men” line but he is also recognizing how hard everything has been for everyone and using an actual tangible event to lift spirits rather than referring to meaningless bullshit about god and country. and the simple fact that he seeks blanky’s advice and knowledge is more than sir john would ever have done in a scenario like this. he understands from blanky’s story about ross that he himself hasn’t been doing enough to combat the horror of their situation for the men, he understands that he must do more. even the way he asks ‘what do you mean’ when blanky says ross had no sympathy for the ill. to not care for the ill is an alien concept to him. tt’s so interesting because fitzjames occupies a space not dissimilar to francis’s- he has access and power in the hierarchy of the discovery service but, within his own mind, he is still an outsider. crozier on the other hand is a visible and tangible outsider due to his birth and his nationality. everyone can see it and i think that’s also part of why fitzjames is so antagonistic towards francis in the beginning- the projection goes crazy and in the true spirit of colonialism and white supremacy, james believes that if he can make himself as far apart from someone like francis as possible and align himself with men like franklin and barrow despite sharing way more similarities with francis than he does with them, he can succeed in upholding himself as the vision of victorian masculinity and social worthiness that he so desperately tries to emulate- this is what i was thinking about during the scene with silna’s father where he’s reluctant to fully show his (partial) sympathy to her
the line from the script that kills me is when it says a clock has begun for fitzjames once he discovers the blood in his hair… god it kills me, he knew he was dying for months. for literal months and who knows if he even told anyone but… i do think he had to have told francis at some point. it makes me so sick, it’s literally why the cairn walk scene happens- he knew he was dying, he knew it and one of the last things he wanted before he died was for someone to see him, truly see him flaws and mistakes and vanity and all before he died. and he wanted that person to be francis
gotta include the scene where james tells edward that francis was right about walking out- this is a huge turning point from ep 1
it’s so funny that when crozier and fitzjames see each other at carnival you can tell james is like “oh shit i’m in trouble” but crozier is just slightly amused seeing him like that and even though he finds the carnival strange and sees how reckless it was, he doesn’t chide james or the men about it even though that’s cleary what james is expecting. crozier empathizes with their longing for home and their need to do something happy and uses that momentum to tell the men about walking out and doing his best to reassure them about their chances. the way fitzjames looks up at him and nods along with him- i don’t think we’ve seen fitzjames look at him like that yet up until this point. he is seeing francis for who he can be as a competent captain and we are seeing crozier really step into that role. i also think that francis was relieved that fitzjames saw the urgency in walking out and that he wasn’t going to have to convince him the way he would’ve had to convince franklin. their leadership is finally syncing up here, built on humility (francis admitting he had an addiction and choosing to do something about it, fitzjames admitting how wrong he was about francis and his use of caution and logic) and respect (i do think crozier respected fitzjames for trying to build morale to the best of his ability and i think fitzjames respected francis finally behaving like the captain he needed him to be)
during the fire there’s a small moment where james is frozen- no doubt from ptsd which he deserves- and francis sends him ahead to look for an exit, telling him to go. he fucking loves him!!!!
poor fitzjames.. like yes the ghosts of his colonial past and all that of course which i will never not fully support him being subjected to but damn. and i don’t think he shrugs francis off because it’s francis or because he’s angry with them, he is punishing himself and francis sees that and lets him do what will help ease his own guilt and pain. tt is a moment of understanding between them i believe- fitzjames showing vulnerability in front of a man he now respects while adding another failure to his own personal checklist he keeps against himself (i can only imagine he does anyway). francis’s attempt to show him care and understanding while not undercutting his usefulness is also such an inspired choice for what he knows of fitzjames. you can really see the care starting to sprout between them here. i can only imagine what the rest of the winter was like but i feel like by episode 7, their dynamic has just completely changed, their entire vibe is different. and their love couldn’t have happened until they left the ships so it came at the worst and best time.
and by ep 7 their dynamic has just so completely shifted. even the fact that they are supervising the packing for the walk together and this may be real delusional hours but sending edward ahead to make the first camp instead of one of them going is a little interesting to me. i believe he’s technically the next in line for leadership after fitzjames but like did francis and james want to spend time together? with crozier finally dried out and knowing james’s time is almost up? them finally in a comfortable and friendly place? i love their conversation during the packing scene because fitzjames is voicing a concern to francis who calmly explains his reasoning and when fitzjames continues to press his own doubts they remain civil, familiar, acknowledge one another’s thought processes etc. a scene like this could NEVER have happened in episode 1 or 2. i looooong to know what they were like together during the winter after carnival
you all know i am INSANE about the fitzier hand holding scene, no one can match my freak on this. tt makes my stomach flutter every time i see it. it is my pride and prejudice hand clenching scene. first i want to acknowledge the quote from the script- “at one point, the only thing keeping fitzjames from sliding back into oblivion is crozier’s hand, but half the importance about the act is that fitzjames reached for it.” this KILLS me more than anything else from the script. and honestly at this point in the story i am becoming convinced that james told crozier about the scurvy, they knew the whole fucking time, they knew. they are literally marching to their deaths, against all odds still going, still trying and they are falling in love. the way james gazes up at francis in awe when he sees the offered hand and doesn’t stop looking at francis when he is up on the ridge. crozier doesn’t even turn to look at james, but he does make sure to stop and wait for him and extend the hand that he knows that james needs. Based on honestly even just this alone i am convinced that crozier knew about the scurvy already. there’s no fucking way he didn’t. and then the way james grabs francis’s jacket and holds on while they stare at each other, crozier smiling- it’s so interesting to me because it very much tells of finding an excuse to touch crozier again, as if he was so in awe of the touch that crozier initiated a few minutes before that he needed it again. he was trying to find a way to touch him again in that “this has to be acceptable by victorian standards of emotional and loving expression” way. and crozier accepts it! he smiles, he meets his gaze. there’s triumph there. and don’t think i didn’t fucking notice that the hand that francis keeps is the hand that held fitzjames’s hand and that also held his face when he was dying.
in the scene with morfin, as soon as crozier notices that james is there he makes sure to maneuver over to james so he can place himself between james and the gun despite the fact that he is unarmed and james has his pistol with him. i don’t necessarily doubt that francis would do this earlier in the story but i can say that he does this here as a selfless act of love and protection
and then the jop promotion scene yay the way james looks at francis with admiration and curiosity when he hands him the promotion letter to sign and the way james smiles at him when he reads it but not just because of that- but because of the words francis uses and the way francis is looking at him, saying someone “has earned our respect (looks to james), trust” and fitzjames smiles and nods- it’s not just about agreeing with him about jopson. this is how fitzjames feels about crozier now and the fact that crozier even in this small subtle way acknowledges that he DID need to prove himself to james after his behavior during the winter. their dynamic is just so much different now! at the end when everyone is shaking jopson’s hand, fitzjames gives crozier like… the most insane loving soft look… he looks so so happy. i don’t think we’ve ever seen him look like that before.
and now we are at the cairn walk. i again have to say how during this rewatch i become convinced of the knowledge that crozier has to know that fitzjames is dying. there’s just no way he doesn’t. the conversation they have about it does not convey that james is telling him this for the first time. tt more so implies that they both know but don’t speak of it often and james is updating francis with the vital information, the stages he’s at. what made fitzier happen was them leaving the boats, james dying, crozier getting sober, them both laying it all out on the table in different moments of vulnerability- crozier with his addiction, james with his heritage. the way those scenes parallel each other is actually crazy. james is fucking dying, they are all marching to their deaths and the knowledge that they are doing so is slowly sinking in, and all james wanted before he died was for crozier to see him, all of him. even the parts he was afraid to tell anyone, even himself. and francis isn’t even granting him a mercy, he isn’t sparing his feelings. he truly and genuinely accepts james for who he is, how he came to be a part of the expedition. they have both known from the start that beginnings and heritage don’t matter, it’s the actions that people take that makes them who they are. in different ways they both knew that and i think it’s part of what aligned them eventually. and from the script- james realizes he can say anything to this man. it is possible. crozier gives him the space to do it. and just the way they’re laughing and joking and being light with each other- another thing we never would’ve seen in the earlier episodes. okay focusing on some details now- when crozier says “that’s not how i see you” james literally stumbles as if he can’t believe crozier would say that to him. in the beginning of the scene francis gives james space and privacy when he sees him getting emotional about graham and franklin’s deaths and struggling to remember the date of sir john’s death. they communicate with a single glance there, james asking for a moment and crozier giving it to him. the grief on francis’s face when james tells him his latest symptoms. when crozier initially tries to comfort and encourage james… and james can’t accept it because he hasn’t told him everything yet. he doesn’t know if he can. i don’t want to get personal but that feeling that if you only tell part of your hidden sorrow to someone and they comfort and accept you and show you kindness, that feeling you then get that no no no you don’t know the whole of it and if you did you wouldn’t be showing me this kindness, you wouldn’t love me, you wouldn’t respect me. you wouldn’t see me. i genuinely can’t imagine the relief that fitzjames felt when he told francis it all, he told him everything and all francis gave back was love. also we can finally start to really see the bruise that francis gave fitzjames in ep 5. i love when fitzjames literally and metaphorically closes the gap between them. and francis waits for him until he is by his side again. “are we brothers francis” the tears, the attempt to laugh/smile them away until he sees that crozier is with him in this moment and taking it as seriously as it deserves to be. again the joining of the hands, the one that crozier keeps. they look at each other’s mouths, into each other’s eyes, the way francis dips his head to look at fitzjames when fitzjames ducks his emotionally. it’s insanity
when they get back to camp and listen to hodgson’s story and then go to see jirv’s body, they exchange a lot of glances, specifically around the times that hodgson mentions hickey- they are of one mind on him and on how the situation actually played out. james also watches francis a lot in the scene where they go to see jirv’s body. he looks to him for leadership now and doesn’t become irritated by his anger or his candor. this really persists for the rest of the episode - in the scene where crozier is yelling at edward about supplementing the marines all james has to say is “francis” and then basically talks him down from yelling at edward more, another scene i don’t think could have ever happened between them earlier in the story but james knows how to quell francis now. and this is such an interesting parallel to ep 5 when everyone was taking their shit out on edward; this time fitzjames protects him. but anyway- james and francis are just so in sync in every scene in this episode- they back each other up, communicate through glances, emphasize each other’s words and authority. yay<3
all right you’re all going to have to bear with me on ep 9 because it makes me crazy.
we gotta start with the fucking grief and pain in both of their expressions when they’re taking care of pocock and how this scene itself foreshadows the assisted suicide later
the look of absolute love and faith from fitzjames when crozier is telling them they will keep marching south and the “more than god loves them” scene- this is francis at his most captainly- and james is echoing his hollow vanity stricken words about franklin but really really meaning them about crozier- he says them to no one but himself, there is no performance here and crozier’s words aren’t a false display of empathy and care like franklin’s were for david young and fitzjames sees this.
fitzjame and crozier are hauling in front side by side- it makes a point to mention that in the script too.
when fitzjames falls… ugh. he hauled until he couldn’t anymore, direct call back to when blanky said ross sat atop the sledges- oh and when francis and fitzjames were caring for pocock together vs ross having no sympathy for illness. when james falls he reaches for crozier without even looking at him at first and you can hear crozier saying “it’s all right, it’s all right” when james is saying he can’t stand the heat. dundy and bridgens are lifting fitzjames up too but when he stumbles, when he reveals his wound, when he stumbles again, he is only looking at crozier the whole time. and the look on crozier’s face is one i don’t think we’ve seen from him yet. i noticed too that he’s holding onto fitzjames with his left arm and rubbing his back with the other before he takes the rope off of him.
i want to say about the following scene where james is laid up in the boat that i made a joke once to my friend about when crozier reaches into the boat and how it looks like they’re holding hands- but they actually are, it’s in the script. there’s just something about crozier’s face when he talks to fitzjames in later episodes, there’s such a softening of the edges to him, his expression is less guarded and more attentive and earnest. and the call back to their first scene together with the chinese sniper story…. the fucking fondness in both of their eyes as they laugh together, which was probably james’s last time laughing. when crozier says “there’s time” but that’s the tragedy of this show- there’s never enough time. everything happens too late.
james screaming in pain and crozier running to him and barely letting bridgens finish his sentence before he tells them to camp here also in the script during the officer’s meeting right after, they can hear fitzjames screaming in his tent :( i’m honestly kinda glad they left that out.
and here we are at THE fitzier scene. i could talk for hours about this scene. francis is holding james’s hand, rubbing his shoulder. james looks so young and frail and scared here and he uses some of his last words to tell francis he wanted him to live because he knew he wouldn’t be around to tell him that anymore soon. francis shaking his head when he says it as if to say “not without you”. in the script, when bridgens leaves it says ‘he looks at crozier. he looks at fitzjames. he understands”... and later during james’s funeral when crozier says that he had a service with james, just the two of them, peglar and bridgens exchange a very interesting, knowing look. to choose those two to react that way? idk man. fitzier real. but back to the scene- god okay crozier taps james’s chest twice in question and then just barely audible fitzjames says “please”. ugh the sad smile crozier gives fitzjames before he gives him the drug… then he places his hand, the one that crozier doesn’t lose, so gently and lovingly on james’s face, and even in his current state james looks almost taken aback at the gesture. when crozier tips the drug into his mouth his expression softens. i will never ever in my life forget the way james looks at crozier in that moment, the look of gratitude, love, farewell, of pain, longing, childlike fear. (nobody is doing it like tobias). crozier ever so lightly brushing james’s lips with both of his thumbs before he begins to massage it down and carefully wiping the excess away. they never stop looking at each other. dave k said that the service that crozier mentions happened before fitzjames dies and after crozier gives him the drug.
the last thing i want to say about the james death scene is that i was never that invested in the concept of cannibalism as a metaphor for love but fitzjames asking crozier to eat his body and live really really stuck in my brain- just their entire insane journey that i’ve been sitting here thinking about for months- acquaintances to enemies to allies to friends to lovers for it all to culminate in this final scene of fitzjames begging crozier to eat from his body and begging him to give him the final kiss of death all as crozier never once looks away or lets go of him. fitzjames loved him so much he was willing for crozier to desecrate his corpse if it meant francis would live, even without him next to him but crozier loved him so much that he couldn’t do it, he couldn’t add that act to his already impossibly devoted actions.
and the action of hiding james’s body because crozier doesn’t want tuunbaq to destroy it but then it turns out that someone at the very funeral ends up leading the mutineers to tear fitzjames’s body apart themselves. just like jirv not getting to keep the final gift of the seal meat even in death, crozier couldn’t do james this one last mercy even though he tried desperately to.
and this last part is a bit of a stretch but okay-along with the shirt and the gloves of fitzjames’s that crozier is wearing after his death i think he might be wearing his little neck thing too, so sorry y’all i do not know what it’s called and i’m locked in trying to finish this and i’m not googling it lol. but we see fitzjames wear it a lot throughout the show and francis does sometimes but it’s very much a fitzjames piece so i think it might be his too. and with the funeral scene and the blanky scene, we see the mismatched gloves clearly for the first time but i’m pretty sure the first glimpse is earlier in the episode when they’re hauling before fitzjames collapses. dave k still confirmed they had switched gloves but it really seems that this happened before james died, likely when they left terror camp. i still contend that crozier and fitzjames both knew james was dying and this may have been why they did it.
and on to the last episode and closing thoughts- in the last ep i was really keeping track of the gloves- he loses them at some point and i wanted to see when and it’s between the scene where he talks to hickey and when he’s chained back up in the tent with diggle. i hope he somehow hung on to them.
i will never forget how my stomach dropped out when i saw hickey wearing fitzjames’s boots on my first watch- the fucking sorrow in crozier’s face. he doesn’t understand the meaning just yet but when goodsir is cleaning his wounds and tells him they ate gibson, you can see crozier put it together that that’s why hickey has fitzjames’s boots. his expression turns from shock and grief to rage.
hickey really clocked crozier with the shame comment and you can see how it triggers crozier. this is a great confirmation because it really pervades the story and fitzjames’s story as well. they are both driven by shame, by a need to prove themselves but go about it in completely different ways. fitzjames is all bravado, flowery empty words and boasting to cover his origins, his feelings of inadequacy. he aligns himself with the empire and with those in power and distances himself from anyone he knows will be deemed lesser than in the hierarchy in which he exists and specifically pits himself against someone like crozier in order to bolster his own social standing. crozier on the other hand is hardened to his station, he has no way to hide his nationality or his origins no matter how capable he is and how long he’s been going to sea. crozier feels the shame of things like sophia’s rejection and not having straights that they sail named after him but hides it with his bluntness and his lack of decorum when pointing out the truth of a situation. james has everything crozier wishes he did, but crozier is something that james wishes he could be- just himself, despite his societal ineptitudes and barriers. i believe that this basis and the way it melds and breaks down and comes to a way of understanding between them is why fitzier is so strong, and so real and so visceral, especially at the end. honestly there is so much more i could say but i think i’m going to leave it there and just saw that i hope crozier thinks of james from time to time in his new life. i find it hard to believe he doesn’t.
#the terror#fitzier#james fitzjames#francis crozier#this kind of turned into a bit of a character study on fitzjames as well but hopefully you all just see that as a bonus
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Dick Prime
Warnings: (18+ only minors DNI), NSFW, 5k word count, fem reader, self- insert OC character, daddy kink, p in v, rick prime with feelings, big dick Rick, degradation a bit, rough sex, praise kink, marking kink, choking, orgasms, cream-pie, fingering, nipple play, manhandling, calling him God, age gap I guess
Hi guys, this is an excerpt chapter from a Rick Sanchez fan fic I have been working on - thought I'd share a little taste on here and see if I could get any feedback. This chapter in particular follows my self-insert, Aurora as she is kidnapped by Rick Prime - enjoy :) If y'all would like me to post and share my other chapters pls reblog or comment 💜
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I woke up in a unfamiliar place٫ my head pounding viscously as my eyes struggled to adjust to the room around me. This place kind of looked like some sort of space motel room٫ but I couldn't remember a thing from the last 12 drunken hours of my life - I clearly needed to dial back my drinking or just not let Rick bet he can out drink me. I’ve never won that challenge. He really does have the hardest working liver in the universe, that's for damn sure. I wondered if he was feeling the same٫ but I doubted he was even remotely feeling hungover since he was used to getting black-out drunk on the regular.
I flicked my wrist out٫ wanting to portal into Rick’s shoddy bedroom where I could crawl into his sad excuse of a bed (which was really just a small sized cot) with him so that he could hold me tightly while we slept. That plan was quickly cut as I noticed my portal bracelet was no longer on my wrist and it was no where to be found anywhere near me - what the fuck was going on?
Then I realized where I was - the realization smacking me hard in the face like a fucking freight train. The elaborate sci-fi technical patterns covering every square inch of this room should have been a dead give away from the second I laid eyes on it٫ but I was obviously still too inebriated to use my cognitive functions correctly. I was in what I was 95% sure was Rick Prime’s lair - that fucking cocksucker. How had he managed to find me? Much less find a way to lure me back to where he's been hiding this whole time.
As I was taking in every inch of the room in search of any kind of weapon, maybe even some sort of weird sci-fi button on a wall that I could press and magically find a way out of here under Prime’s nose, I suddenly heard a voice behind me٫ the sound striking me so hard I jumped.
“Great you’re awake٫ care to join me for breakfast?” Prime’s voice asked as he nonchalantly yet menacingly stood in the doorway of the room٫ his shoulder leaning up against the doorframe.
“Oh fuck you!” I spit٫ words coming out of my mouth coated in venom like I was a snake ready to strike.
“Like you have a choice. It’s funny that you thought you did. Let's get something straight٫ you’re mine now٫ so it's best you learn early that you WILL do as I say or there will be consequences.”
“What do you even want from me? Wasn’t killing Diane enough for you?”
“Of course it wasn't٫ but you're not here so I can kill you unfortunately. You’re here because do you know how rare you are?” He paused٫ walking forward into the room causing me to back up back onto the bed like a frightened little mouse. Damn, his presence was so intense. He started pacing a bit٫ back and forth٫ arms crossed across his chest as he did so. He turned to me and looked me directly into my eyes before he started speaking again.
“Every conceivable Rick in the universe would happily serve their own balls on a platter for a little taste of what you have to offer - this makes you especially interesting to me. Not only are you one sexy piece of ass٫ you are a Rick’s gateway to so much unlocked potential.”
“Excuse me?”
“If ‘wife guy’ was smart he would have stolen your research from you a long time ago. Do you know how long it took for me to find you? It makes me horny just thinking about all that untapped knowledge you have floating around in that brain of yours.”
“Anything my Rick wanted from me he got because he asked for it. Sorry٫ but I don’t barter for things I created especially not to a sci-fi douchebag like you.”
“No one said anything about bartering. I’m simply going to take what I need via brain scan and then you’re going to put out like a good little girl because when in Rome.”
“My Rick is going to kill you ya know? You’ve taken enough from him and he isn’t going to let you take me too.”
“I’ve avoided him this long and clearly he hasn't learned his lesson yet. I’ve recreated the omega device and this time it can fire more than once٫ I’ll wipe out his entire family line he comes anywhere close to me. I’d kill you too if you weren't so valuable - you should be lucky that a guy like me finds any interest in anyone but himself.”
“You might think that you have me right where you want me٫ but I’m gonna enjoy watching my Rick kill you when he finds you and if you’re lucky maybe we’ll have sex next to your corpse.” I said٫ my words carrying through the air like poison coursing through my vascular system.
It probably wasn’t in my best interest to be taunting Prime the way I was٫ but I refused to let this son of a bitch have it easy especially when it was his dumb ass decision to kidnap me. He knew my Rick was looking for him and he knew he was getting close hence why he even bothered making such an elaborate take on his own already ‘overkill’ device. All that brain and this motherfucker couldn’t grasp the fact that killing peoples’ loved ones doesn’t really warrant being left alone.
“You think I couldn’t just take you right here if I wanted to? I’d bend you over that table and destroy that tight little pussy of yours and I just might considering you have no idea when to shut that bitch mouth of yours.” He grabbed me by the throat as he said that٫ squeezing the sides of my neck hard as he pulled me up and close to him. If I didn’t hate this Rick - I would have thought this interaction was so hot٫ too bad it was Prime.
“I’d like to see you try.” I said before spitting in his face٫ which in hindsight might have been a mistake٫ but it was too late to take it back.
Prime still had me by the neck٫ but he sighed heavily before shoving me onto the floor - catching myself on my hands before I hit the ground.
“Don’t even bother trying to use any of your cybernetics - I put a lock on all of your tech and good luck putting up much of a fight without it.”
---------- 2 weeks later —--------
Over the few weeks that I had been here٫ regardless of how much of an asshole Prime was٫ no matter what it was that I needed or asked (within reason) for he was quick to give it to me. He didn’t appreciate any of my back talk and if I overstepped too far he did with hold things from me as a punishment٫ but for the most part it seemed like his intentions with me weren’t entirely evil - something I not only found puzzling٫ but very difficult to believe was actually genuine.
I pushed the limits of what he would allow a little bit further everyday٫ hoping to gain his trust so that I would be able to either escape or find someway to get a message to my Rick. I still wasn't exactly sure where we even were in relation to the universe - the curve - or maybe we were outside it? It was hard to know with the very little freedom within this elaborate sci-fi base that I was allowed. The most I could do while here was think - run through multiple plans and assess the probability of success rate to each plan I thought of. Most٫ if not every٫ plan I had managed to conjure up was far from impervious to any snags or complete failure given then sheer innate ability of Rick Prime to always somehow be 10 steps ahead.
Today felt different though٫ I couldn't explain it٫ but as I sat across from him eating the breakfast that he had prepared for me - I could feel a different kind of tension in the air.
“Do you want to know why exactly you’re so special٫ Aurora?”
“I’m sure you’re gonna tell me even if I say no, so why the hell not?”
I was pushing around my eggs with my fork now٫ waiting patiently for his response. He kept telling me how ‘rare’ and ‘special’ I was to his grand design٫ but no matter how often he brought this up (which felt like constantly)٫ he refused to tell me how and why. Until now that is٫ which also struck me as weird.
“In order for you to even exist at all٫ Diane had to die you know? You’re familiar with the big bang I assume?”
“Nah٫ I just have a PhD in Quantum Physics for absolutely no reason at all - in fact٫ I just printed it off the internet completely fabricated credentials.” I said٫ the sarcasm clear in my tone as I spoke - I ran the risk of him punishing me for doing so٫ but he was usually lenient with my sarcasm since it matched his overt cynicism. It was my sharp tongue for disrespect and foul insults that really got under his skin.
“Well when I created the omega device to wipe out Diane٫ I didn't think to solve for any kinds of ripple effect that it might cause.”
“Meaning what exactly?”
“Well not completely unlike the big bang - the destruction of Diane’s life across infinity somehow resulted in the cataclysm that created X-258.”
“You’re saying you're responsible for me even existing? How is that even possible? Rapid succession in an inflationary epoch?”
“Precisely - well said. This means that without my omega device٫ you wouldn’t exist. How do you think ‘'wife guy” is going to react when he finds out that I literally made his new slam piece?”
“If you’re even telling the truth٫ which I suppose it is possible therefore also equally not possible by association. I guess given the rightly distribution of a negligible density gradient in order to deter the collapse into just a black hole and taking into consideration cosmic acceleration - I can’t disprove your theory٫ but that doesn’t mean you aren’t just bullshitting me right now.”
“As much as I love bullshitting and torturing other Rick’s for my own amusement٫ this is as real as real gets Aurora. You are only here because Diane had to die. You’re welcome and I’ll be accepting all forms of payment as a thank you٫ especially sexual favors.”
“Wow٫ so my whole life is a lie - imagine that.”
“You don’t seem too deeply affected by this revelation?”
“Did you expect me to lose my mind over a random occurring cosmological event? There was no way you knew your elimination of Diane would result in the formation of a universe that randomly produced me - so you did something by accident which is literally how 80% of all scientific findings usually occur. You aren’t special or interesting just because you managed to create a random event in spacetime - I do appreciate your massive need to milk your ego about it though.”
“Spoken like a true Rick - which you are as far as I’m concerned. The most intriguing out of any possible iteration.”
“So what exactly about that makes me so valuable to you?”
“Other than the fact that ‘'wife guy” loves you٫ according to my advanced research using your brain scans and blood and tissue samples٫ I should be able use both to develop the infinite Rick serum which would make me immortal. I’m not referencing no low grade cybernetic٫ tech bullshit either. I’m talking real٫ invincible immortality. An actual God with the power to create and destroy whatever and whoever I want - 100% unstoppable.”
“Wow٫ who could have possibly guessed that the power hungry evil٫ emo٫ sci-fi Rick with a nondescript haircut would want something so nuanced and lame? If you’re immortal that kind of takes away from the pay off does it not? Not that doing anything honorably is a concern of yours of course.”
“So what do you think about giving your input on something for me?”
“Once again - why bother even asking if you’re just going to make me do it anyways?”
“I guess to give you the illusion of free will or just maybe I kind of like you - don’t get a big head about it though I would still kill you without a second thought if I ever needed to.”
“Okay what exactly am I giving my input on?”
“I feel it may be best to just show you - meet me in the lab after you’ve finished your breakfast. Don’t keep me waiting long, it won’t end well for you.”
I rolled my eyes at his threatening tone as he got up from the table and left the room, I don’t know why I was so attracted to Prime the way I was - especially after what he did to my Rick, but I came to the ultimate conclusion that it was because him and my Rick were indeed so similar. The two Rickest Ricks in all of the infinite number of Rick’s that existed - the only two Rick’s to actually invent portal travel. In a way, my Rick only existed the way he did because of Prime’s destruction of his simple, domestic life. Prime was literally just my Rick without any sense of moral obligation and no matter how much I tried to convince myself that this fucker was bad and that I needed to distance myself - I simply couldn’t. I felt like my dna was so entangled up in having love for Rick that despite Prime’s obvious evil, I still loved him for simply just being a version of Rick. How fucked was that? Jesus fucking Christ - I needed out of here and soon before I really fucked up.
I finished my breakfast and headed out of the kitchen and into Prime’s elaborate sci-fi laboratory - this guy never did anything subtle that was for fucking sure and his attention to detail was absolutely infallible. He had something pulled up on the screen above where he was sitting and the closer I got, the more my eyes focused on the image. It was an image of me with a younger Rick, my Rick and Birdperson when we were together as freedom fighters on Glap-Flaps Third Moon. The Battle of Blood Ridge - this image was obviously a snapshot taken from my mind when Prime brain scanned me, but I didn’t really understand its significance to him. But, I’m sure he was going to tell me even if I didn’t exactly care to know.
“Blood Ridge?” I questioned, my arms crossed across my chest as I approached his sitting form and stood beside him to wait for his response.
“Seems like Nietzsche wasn’t totally blowing smoke out of his ass when he said that whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster -”
“And if you gaze long enough into the abyss, the abyss will gaze back at you. What does Nietzsche have to do with Blood Ridge?” I cut him off by finishing the Friedrich Nietzsche quote he was referring to.
“Well I’m so glad you asked Aurora…” He started as he pulled up a replay of Rick and I’s interaction with Birdperson after the Battle had been won. I watched the playback intently, hoping to see something within my own memory that maybe I hadn’t noticed before in order to try to put together a theory of where exactly Prime was going with this.
-Playback from ‘Aurora’s Memory’ initiated-
Memory Rick: “Damn that shit was cash.”
Bird Person: “It was extremely bad ass. The Battle of Blood Ridge is over. The Federation lost. I am in your debt.”
Memory Rick: “Come with us.”
Bird Person: “To somewhere…nearby?”
Memory Rick: “Anywhere. E-Everywhere.”
Bird Person: “Rick, Aurora, I don't expect you guys to keep fighting, but this war is…”
Aurora: “Far from over…we know.”
Memory Rick: “Dude, we share this with almost nobody, but we could take you right now to this same battlefield, in a universe where we lost, or another where we won, or another where the war never even happened. All equally real, all equally unreal. None of it matters.”
Bird Person: “Then why did you help?”
Memory Rick: “Because I respect you. And I wanted you to know you could respect me.”
Bird Person: “Even though nothing matters?”
Memory Rick: “Okay. You matter... to me.”
Bird Person: “Uh, the relationship that we have…”
Memory Rick: “I NEVER used that word!”
Bird Person: “... is not worth my integrity…”
Memory Rick: “Oh, my God. It's not a complicated transaction, my man. "Would you like to join me doing awesome shit that matters?" "No, I would not. I would rather be a judgmental dork." Case closed. Really no need to drag it out.”
Bird Person: “If you need me, use the beacon.”
Memory Rick: “Yeah, I'm gonna use that beacon a lot. I hope... hope I don't wear it out. Come on Aurora, lets get the fuck out of here.”
—- Playback Finalized —--
“Okay, so what exactly does my memory of Bird Person rejecting my Rick have anything to do with you?”
“Seems allegorical in relation to how Diane died don’t you think? His rejection of me, Bird Person’s rejection of him, you either die a hero or see yourself live long enough to become the villain.”
“Are you trying to suggest to me that my Rick has essentially turned into you? I hope you’re not because that would be absolutely nonsensical.”
“You see Aurora, your Rick isn’t all he’s cracked up to be either. He’s murdered hundreds if not thousands of innocent Ricks, he’s manipulated a version of our adult daughter to get a divorce, he sells weapons to hit men and other criminals, he Cronenberged my original dimension and left my daughter, my granddaughter and my Jerry behind to rot in a world that he ruined, he exploited and threatened to destroy a microverse that he created to control his fucking car, and the worst possible one he trapped all the people in his original reality into an endless mental time loop while their bodies still grew old. Your Rick isn’t and never was the saint you believe him to be - so why hate me for something so small in the grand scheme of things?”
“You’re literally the reason why he did most of that. I don’t think my Rick is a saint, I think he’s a sad, broken man who is trying his best to continue on in his life after losing the very thing he used to live for. What makes my Rick so different from you is his capability to feel and connect to human emotion - his wild callousness is just a front so he doesn’t have to feel the pain his life radiates. He has surpassed you in so many ways, but he will NEVER be the monster you are because he is capable of changing. You know nothing about him and even sitting here under the guise that you do is ridiculous. You will never be him and he will NEVER be you.”
“You’d defend him even if he was the one who killed your husband wouldn’t you?”
“My husband died because you killed Diane - because you accidentally created X-258 where my husband was killed in a freak fucking accident. To even insinuate such an asinine thought is in bad taste even for you. If anything, you’d be indirectly responsible for the death of my husband, big fucking shocker there.”
“How would your husband feel if he knew you gave up on him to be with Rick?”
“My husband has been gone for 25 years, Prime and I loved him dearly when he was alive, but Rick, my Rick, is the love of my life. I don’t have to explain ‘love’ to you especially because you are literally incapable of ever fucking getting it. Killing your wife across infinity because some alternate versions of yourself pissed you off? The mother of your daughter - you have some fucking nerve.”
I was angry now, my words slicing into Prime’s direction like a knife and he was clearly getting upset with my tone towards him. I don’t know exactly what his end goal with me was - he had my blood and tissue samples, he had my brain scans. Why not just let me go or kill me if he got what he had said he wanted? Then it hit me. Prime was in love with me. A man that I had labeled as so incapable of feeling had some sort of feelings for me - what a fucking mind fuck that was to take in. I had made myself speechless as I waited patiently for him to say something to either confirm or deny my theory, but he said nothing so I spoke once more.
“You love me, don’t you? You have feelings for me.”
His silence after I said that was deafening and he quickly stood up from his place in his chair to grab my face in his hands roughly and smash his lips to mine. I knew it. He kissed me so roughly that I barely even had time to react, but once I was finally able to comprehend what was happening, I deepened the kiss. I was actually enjoying this despite how fucking wrong my moral compass knew that it was. He pulled away from me gently, his blue eyes looking me dead in mine before he said in a very demanding, yet hot, tone;
“Strip for me.”
And I did exactly as I was told.
—----------
His hand bent around the curvature of my neck brushing it softly as he continued to walk around me٫ his other hand finding my breasts and taking a nipple into his free hand subtly. He rubbed the nub between his thumb and forefinger as he continued to eye me up and down with an obvious hunger in his eyes٫ his other hand snaking down my body slowly till it found rest on my hip gently pulling me to him as he did so.
“You are so beautiful.” He whispered٫ his eyes glued to my chest as he spoke eloquently.
He was still fully clothed٫ but I was determined to change that - I reached forward and begun unzipping his jacket٫ him allowing it to fall to the floor as I pushed it off his shoulders. I found the hem of his long sleeve next٫ my hands creeping slowly underneath to touch his warm skin and my god his skin felt like I was touching pure electricity the more my fingers danced over his adorable blue happy trail to find a home on his belt buckle. I began undoing it roughly٫ pulling his belt through the loops in his jeans and throwing it elsewhere. I unbuttoned his jeans with my hands٫ quickly slipping my fingers under the waistband of his boxers where I longed to have his dick pressed up against any part of me.
I smirked up at him as I pulled him even closer to my naked body٫ his hands wrapping around me in all the right ways as I felt his extremely hard member pressing into one my thighs now. The length and the girth simply drove me insane as I continued to work diligently to undress him. He suddenly grabbed the back of my head with enough force to crash my lips to his٫ our lips melding together perfectly and I couldn’t help٫ but let out a small moan in favor of his wicked foreplay. The more he touched and teased me٫ the more I desperately wanted to beg him to just destroy me right there. I was so fucked. Fucking Prime. What was I doing? At this point I was too far gone to care - I wanted him and I wanted him BAD.
I pushed his black jeans down past his jutted hip-bones٫ them falling down his tall stature to pool at his feet before he stepped out of them and led me back up against the wall. His fingers left my breasts٫ trailing down until they reached the very top of my mound - him allowing a single digit to pass between my folds to feel the abundance of wetness that I had increasing with each moment between my legs.
“So wet for me already٫ such a horny girl for any Rick aren’t you?” He licked his lips as he pulled away from mine to speak٫ him looking me dead in the eyes as he said that - the lust obvious in his gorgeous icy blue eyes.
“You have no idea how much I long for you to absolutely destroy me.” I whispered back٫ my fingers grappling the side of his boxers before pushing them off of him in one swift motion that now left him vulnerable and naked in front of me like I had been this entire time and ugh was it so worth the wait.
Prime had so many scars littering his whole body٫ adding a sense of mystery and a hot toughness to his already sexy body. I felt guilty that I was about to do this٫ but he was still a Rick whether he was evil or not and holy fuck did his extreme callousness and his “I don’t give a single fuck” attitude turn me on even more. I was like putty in Prime’s hands right now and he was loving it.
“I think I have a pretty good concept٫ but you have no idea how fucking gorgeous you are. If I could٫ I would put you on display so that everyone could see me destroy a perfect little pussy like yours. Holy fuck.”
“You want to fuck me in front of spectators?”
“I want them to revel in jealousy over how I get to be buried in a perfect little thing like you.”
“They should be jealous of me too٫ getting to be a good little cock sleeve for your perfect and massive cock. I love the way you feel pressed against my thigh right now٫ I almost can’t fucking take it.” I whispered in his ear٫ rolling my hips so that I brushed myself up against his rock hard penis - it almost jumping after me over the sudden sensation.
“Mmm what a good girl٫ stroking daddy Prime’s ego. I think it's high time I reward you for such good and filthy behavior.”
He grabbed me harshly by the hips and lifted me till I was straddling his waist with my back up against the wall as he placed himself at my entrance. He parted me gently with the head of his dick before slamming into me so aggressively that I cried out as I felt him ram into my cervix hard as he stroked my g-spot on the way there.
“Oh my god.” I panted٫ holding on to him with a death grip around his neck and my fingers tangling in his powder blue hair as he continued to thrust up into me skillfully.
“That’s right darling٫ I am your god.” He said٫ his lips attacking my neck and jawline with an abundance of sloppy kisses - him using his teeth to mark me however he wanted. The sweet feeling of the slight pain driving me crazy as I held onto him tighter - slowly rocking my hips in tandem with his getting a small moan from him in return as I bounced on his cock dexterously.
“It’s like universe literally created you just for me٫ the way your pussy just grips the absolute fuck out of my dick. Fuuck Aurora٫ no fucking wonder why “wife guy” is so obsessed with you٫ you take dick like a fucking champ.”
“It's not hard when Rick’s have such dynamite dick game - I’ve never ever been disappointed by a Rick sexually.” I purred٫ gripping tufts of his hair and pulling hard enough to hear him moan against my skin.
“Is that so, mmm you were so worth the wait.”
“I want you to come in me so hard that you see fucking stars, baby.” I growled in his ear as he continued to fuck me hard up against the wall, one of arms on the side of me bracing himself and his other hand was wrapped around my neck holding me to the wall tightly. I hadn’t noticed before now, but his ‘6,5” frame had me up in the air so high, holy shit - I felt like I was practically floating off of the ground at this moment. Damn the sex was good.
He soon moved his arm against the wall in order to place his long, lanky fingers on my clit, abusing the nub gently as he continued to go in and out of me. He was watching his dick as he pumped his hips, a smirk plastered on his handsome face as he was enjoying watching his dick disappear inside of me with each thrust. I was moaning loudly now, thankful that we were basically in the middle of nowhere in space because I could have probably awoken a whole cemetery.
“That’s it baby, come for me.”
I could feel that he was close and my eyesight was starting to get blurry the faster his fingers worked to bring me closer to my own climax.
“Oh my god - Prime - I’m - ahhhhhh Rick.” I moaned out as he pushed me over the edge, my pussy pulsating around his dick as he also released into me, burying his face into my shoulder as we rode out the highs of our climaxes together. Both of us sweaty messes as we tried diligently to try and catch our breaths from that absolutely intense workout we had just finished.
Fuck. I seriously just fucked Rick Prime. Fuck.
What had I done?
If you enjoyed this please give the full fan fiction a read - UPDATES EVERY WEEK - 💚
#rick sanchez#rick prime#rick sanchez fanfiction#rick sanchez fuckers#rick sanchez smut#rick prime smut#rick and morty#rick prime fan fiction#rick and morty smut#rick smut#rick sanchez fanfic#rick sanchez x self insert#rick sanchez x oc#rick sanchez x reader#rick sanchez imagine#imagine
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play pretend | joseph quinn
summary: Stranger Things comes to its last season and Joseph is your co-star. It's the last scene of the day, you were doing fine until now. But it was a pretty intense moment and it's hard to keep focus when the boy's lips are close to your neck. 2k.
It was the last scene of the day. And you were pretty exhausted. Even though it was easy and actually fun to share the screen with Joseph, who turned everything lighter and enjoyable, all you wanted to do was go home and get some sleep. But you needed to hold on just a little bit more.
It was pretty intense, this last scene, and you needed to stay focused just a little more, but it started to get harder and harder due to your tiredness and Eddie characterization. At this point, he “came back to life” as Kaz, confirming all the fan theories and headcanons. That meant he was like some kind of vampire. Everytime he smiled you could see his fangs and scars covering his chest.
You couldn’t help thinking it was... hot. Like, so, so hot.
You needed to act scared, and thank god you were a really good actress, because you couldn’t think of anything else other than how stunning he was. Your eyes travelling through his whole body.
“Hey… you ok?” his raspy voice takes you out of your own thoughts, and only then you notice how long you've been staring at him with a stupid face.
“What? nothing.” you swallow hard, giggling out of nervousness, and he doesn't believe you, not even for a second “I’m just… trying to remember my part.”
“oh, don't worry, you're doing amazing darling.” he says with a warm smile and a soft voice that almost feels like it's hugging you, and all you can do is nod as you smile back, your cheeks getting warm too, not sure if he was just being nice, cause he was actually a gentleman, or if there was something… more.
You don't have much time to think deeply about it, though. Or saty anything back to him. Because the director gets back to his seat and shouts to everyone to get to their places.
You were ready to go on your own when Joseph takes your hand and guides you to your marks, and suddenly you get embarrassed of the camera, because you feel everyone was looking at the way your hands were intertwined. And he notices how you seemed away, that's why he squeezes your palm as an attempt to reassure you one more time, before you hear the directors voice's loudly again.
“And ACTION! Whenever you’re ready.”
You take a deep breath and look into those big chocolate puppy eyes. And you feel safe. He’s waiting for you to be prepared, waiting for you to lead the scene, he wouldn't start until you said so, and you nod as a sign.
It’s almost scary the way he turns so fast to something else. You knew he was good at his job, for real, but witnessing it so close was completely different. His eyes getting darker. You weren’t aware that was something actually real, that someone could actually do that kind of thing, and it seems so easy for him to do so.
Then it’s just easy to get along, to get into character and go with him, following his pace now, like you were someone else too.
“Eddie? W-what are you doing?” Your voice cracks a little, and you take a step back, frightened. He looked just like your best friend but something was off.
“Don’t call me that, princess. You know I’m not that freak.” He growls back at you, with a sick smirk on his lips.
A step closer to you, and even though your instincts beg for you to run, you feel frozen, paralyzed. He looks at you up and down, almost like he’s enjoying seeing you so afraid, so vulnerable.
“That’s not funny Eddie, stop. Please.” You beg one more time, your eyes getting cloudy due the tears.
“You know what? You’re starting to piss me off…” He’s close enough now, his breathe against your own, and he looks at you, at every detail of your face, every mole that draws your skin, and he hushs. “Too bad I have to do this to such a pretty, pretty girl…”
He caresses your cheek, tracing his fingers down to your neck and getting your hair out of the way.
And for a second, his eyes slipper to yours and turn soft again, a glance of your sweet boy there once more, a shred of hope.
“Eddie?” you ask one more time, agonizing, praying he could hear you.
“Run.” He says, with his last glance of consciousness, but it’s too late.
His fingers dive into the waves of your hair and he holds tight, pulling it back so your neck gets more exposed.
“Who... who a-are you?” You don’t have any strength to scream or try to escape. You’re horrified, your eyes bursting desperate tears. He smiles, his fangs actually shining when the light hits them, and he dives his teeth to your skin.
And you giggle.
Automatically flinching, you try to hide your neck, and it takes a second for you to notice what just happened. Your eyes get wide open and your cheeks burst into flames.
“CUT! What the heck was that?” You hear the scream, and Joseph lays his forehead on your shoulder as you cover your mouth out of embarrassment. You were so tired you couldn’t control yourself as his touch tickled your skin. And now your swearing every bad word you could think of inside your head, wanting to desapear to the ground.
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…” you repeated that over and over but when you hear Joseph chuckle, all you can do is laugh too.
“You got to be kidding me…” he shushes, nodding as he raises his eyebrows and looks at you with some joy on his face. He thought it was cute, because, to be honest, what could you do?
“I’m extremely sorry. I… I don’t know what happened to me… can we… can we take five? Please?”
You don’t even wait for a confirmation and just run to your dressing room, praying that you could turn invisible for a moment.
“Shit. Shit. Shit.” you repeat uninterruptedly, taking deep breaths and opening your restroom sink, throwing some water to your face with the hope that could wake you up and get you to your senses again. And it seems to be working until you hear the knock at your door.
“I’m almost done, give me just a sec!” You shout through the room, looking your reflex at the mirror as you recompose yourself, but the knock doesn’t go away, and this time it comes accompanied with a sweet voice.
“It’s me, can I come inside?” he asks, seeming a little worried, and you just couldn't say no to him, so you shush a “yes” almost inaudible and he opens the door slowly, entering the room, and immediately closing it behind him.
It takes a sec to any of you to say something. He just stares at you, concerned.
“… you ok?” his voice is so warm that it feels like a cloud envolves your body. Even though you weren't actually ok, he makes you feel better just by saying that.
“Oh, yes, it’s just… I can’t believe myself, we really had it and I ruined it all…” you sigh, disappointed, and pinch the bridge of your nose with your two fingers.
“Hey, hey! Don’t say that. everyone is tired and we understand... you were doing amazing and, you know, we can shoot it over and over again… you don’t have any idea of how many bloopers of me we’re gonna have to watch after the season releases” he laughs, leaning in your direction and looking at you with those big chocolate orbes. You know he’s only saying this to reassure you, to make you feel better, and it works. Actually, he didn’t even need to say anything to make you feel better, but he could always manage to do more.
You felt like you could run away and jump over the highest cliff, because he would catch you, you would be safe. It’s the first time someone made you feel like this in your entire life. You always knew there was something special about that boy.
And the way he was looking at you now, getting closer and closer, just to caress your hair and make you relax, was really… really special…
“It’s ok, really…” he says one more time, and you smile softly, starting to believe him. “I have an idea… we could practice, you know, rehearse that scene so you’ll be prepared to shoot it. what do you think?” For a moment, just a second, he seems shy, vulnerable, and then you are finally sure of what that meant. The way he said it faltering, and looked at you with those big wondering eyes.
All those months shooting together, getting to know each other. The way he looked at you, without hesitation, without looking away not even a single time. And the way he smiled when you always looked back. How he was always close, always joking with you, just to make you laugh, just so he could see your smile.
“yeah, that’s a… that’s a pretty good idea.” you chuckle shyly too, your face heating up, the butterflies dancing inside you. Because you felt the same way.
He smiles, wide open, his face almost shining, and he gets even closer, getting his hand to your neck again, now with a really soft touch, making you shiver, feeling so electric that it seemed like a lightning had just hit you within his skin, through his fingertips.
“Whenever you’re ready.” he jokes, trying the best imitation he could do of the director’s voice, and you roll your eyes at his stupidity. you know he was trying to make you relax, but the way every inch of your body is desiring him make it almost ache.
“Eddie?” you say, your voice sounding a little raspy and aerated because you couldn’t breathe normally, your eyes looking at his under your lashes.
“Don’t run.” Joseph answers, and he smiles at you, his orbes pulling you to him like magnets.
You can’t even say your line back, you just couldn’t breathe properly to your voice to come out. You feel his body getting closer, his face getting closer and closer to yours, the almost nonexistent between you two evaporating.
You stare at him for how long you could, analyzing every single detail that made him himself, just so you could mark the way he was looking at you forever in your head until his lips get to your neck with a gentle kiss. It’s a shock, and you flinch a bit, just because it confirms to you this is real.
You don’t want to laugh this time. On the contrary, you let out a tiny gasp and close your eyes, feeling his warm skin touching yours. His lips tracing its way up your neck, to your jaw, and he stops, just so he could stare at you again, cause he wanted to fix this moment in his mind too.
He holds your face, so carefully you feel you were made of porcelain. Like someone holding the most beautiful flower to ever exist, too afraid to damage its fragile petals. And he kisses you, finally. His lips fit yours so perfectly it almost feels surreal, because it felt like you were designed for each other, like you couldn’t belong to anybody else. It is so soft, the perfect texture, pressure, warmth… Everything was just… perfect.
You’ve waited for this for so long, and you feel so light, almost flying. It sounds cliche, but you’re pretty sure you could hear the fireworks, the ones that you feel exploding inside your chest, like they were actually around you, almost too close… too real…
“Guys? are you there? we need to keep recording!” you hear a muffled voice behind the door, and someone knocking again and again, louder and louder. “guys?”
It takes you two out of that trance, back to reality, and you look into each other’s eyes with such joy you could see the sparkles.
Joseph laughs through the kiss, and hides his face into your neck again. When he looks at you, his face is red like a tomato, and it’s the cutest thing you’ve ever seen, making you giggle as you bite your lower lip, attempting to hide your smile.
“We’re coming!” You answer, looking away when you start to blush, trying to recompose yourself as you fix your hair and your clothes, even though they remained intact.
“We can do it.” He says, holding your chin with his thumb and making you look at him, raising his eyebrows to emphasize his words. “You can do it. And I’ll be with you the whole time.”
You nod, holding his hand and squeezing it a little, just to make sure that was real, that it actually happened.
And you knew, no matter what, from that day on, he would be with you the whole time.
hello! this is my first time writing in another language and posting something here, so I'm sorry if there are any mistakes and I hope you guys understand... anyway, it would be awesome to hear your opnions and I really hope you've enjoyed it!! <3
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On this day I present
Every single time Duck Newton is horrible at lying !
Episode 7
Duck: Yeah, it’s a nickname. Listen, y’all got a van handy, why don’t you hop in and get on trucking. Don’t forget to— don’t worry ‘bout your clothes. We’ll drive them up seperate.
Swimmer: Why can’t we take our clothes?
Duck: [freezing up] You need to— you need— uh. Here, I’ll get them. Y’all start loading in the van and I’ll bring your clothes out to ya’s. Just another one of the many services we offer from the Forestry Service.
Episode 10
Pigeon: Well, I know how to do it, I just wanna know why.
Duck: Perfect. Perfect. Why? It's for firefighter training? Yeah, it's for firefighter training. It's been a little while since I last told someone that, so I had some time to forget it. But it's for firefighting training, cuz we can't get enough water pressure to fight the fires, forest fires.
Pigeon: Out in Monongahela?
Duck: Yeeeeeeep.
Pigeon: Duck, that's on the opposite side of town. I can find other places that I can get you some more water pressure instead of pumping it out of the water park almost a mile away.
Duck: Yeah, but the water park is definitely gonna be closed. If you can tell me somewhere where you can guarantee that they're not gonna need that amount of water that's using that amount, I'd love to hear about it. Cus, off the top of my head, I can't improvise anything.
Pigeon: There's a reservoir right next to Monongahela.
Duck: The reservoir is a source of water but it's not gonna give other— fuck, listen Pigeon, here's the thing. I... love... to… practice fishing. But... the running water... frightens me, it's called hydrophobia. And I would love to practice my cast in a real water environment where I can get in a large body where I can guarantee that running water won't be a factor. And I would just love to practice my cast in a guaranteed still body. But here's the other thing, sometimes if you do it in a lake, that's what you're thinking, a fish will bite it and normally that's ideal, but I'm just trying to practice casting. It's like, when you don't want to catch, that's when they're biting, y’know what I mean? So I need a still body of water that I can guarantee won't move to practice my fishing casting.
Episode 13
Duck: I should’ve put some time into it, honestly, but I uh… I was real busy with family over the holidays, so I didn’t make much—
Mama: You literally just said you didn’t have any family in town over the holidays.
Duck: God dammit. Dammit!
Mama: I mean, it’s fine if you couldn’t dig anything up, but you don’t gotta lie to old Mama, you know?
Duck: Dammit! Dammit, Duck!
Mama: You don’t have to beat yourself up about it, Duck, I mean po—
Duck: Fuck!
Episode 14
EMT: Do you know what happened to him?
Duck: Oh boy…um…do you want the truth or a more convincing lie? Um, nah so, okay, right… so the Pizza Hut sign started to fall, ‘cause of the weather, and he ran up there on… a fire escape… and tried to push it? …With a bat? Damn it. Nah, he just pushed it, and it fell, but then he fell ‘cause he got shocked. I bet… mmm…I didn’t see. I was in-Ah, shit! Alright, hey fol-hey guys, rewind. I-hey guys, rewind a second. Ah fuck! I was inside, I didn’t see. Anything! I don’t know… this man. I do know this man. His name-Fuck! Alright, I Ned, hi, here's-hmmm. Alright, so this man’s name is Ned, and he’s a friend of mine, and I don’t know what the hell happened to him, but you know this guy. He’s always getting into something. I don’t know, I was in the building, I almost got killed by a Pizza Hut sign. I might be in shock!
Episode 18
Duck: Honestly… uh if I gotta tell you the truth, Juno, I’m— I was trying to get into character. I’ve been—
Juno: You’re going undercover with these teens?
Duck: —I’m going undercover. I got a undercover teenage identity. It’s— it’s Frick Richums and when I assume the identity of Frick Richums, I’m trying to get undercover, with the Hornets [hisses] so I can find their illegal grow thing. [grunts]
Juno: You are a truly miserable liar, Duck Newton.
Duck: Goddamnit! I put on such a good— damnit!
Juno: Hey, when you’re finished with the… with those, those nails. Would you mind taking them back to the station? I need to sort of keep going around the perimeter see if I can find something to, you know, maybe help with your investigation to take down those— those drug kingpins, the Hornets.
Duck: Yeah, Juno, about that. I— I was kidding about that, of course. I was just having some fun. But I did… I did hear some of them talking on...... Facebook about you and how they were gonna target you. Like they need to get you out of the way. And it kinda freaked me out a little bit. Can you think of any reason anybody would wanna get you… outta the way? Or— or be targeting you? Like… for this?
Episode 21
(Deputy Dewey is asking for alibis)
Duck: Me— Me— Me too.
Deputy Dewey: You too what? You were
Duck: Yup.
Deputy Dewey: Alright…
Duck: Me too. I was— Yup, I— Yup, me too, for both. Yup, me too. Mmm…
Aubrey: Duck, are you okay? You look like you need to use the bathroom.
Duck: Nope. Yeah, I do. Yup. Uh, Burritos, alright… Bye.
Episode 22 Featuring Ned and Aubrey also being bad at lying
Morgue Technician: Can I help y'all with something?
Duck: Well, we would like to see the bodies of--
Aubrey: My brother!
Duck: My dad.
Ned: My son.
Duck: His brother. Her-- His-- His son, her brother, my dad.
Aubrey: Not related. There's two of 'em.
Ned: But you have to figure out which two.
Duck: We need to see a body for a dare. I'm sorry about all the lies from before but we need to see a body for a dare.
Aubrey: I was dared to look at the body of my brother.
Ned: And my son.
Aubrey: I was dared to look at the body of his son. Who is also my brother. Because he is my father.
Episode 32
Duck: Um… yup. It‘s… Harpo. Uh, all… [imitating crackling noise] Y‘all hearing this? [imitating crackling] The… radio break up. Radio break up. Mrrr.
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Remembering | Tim Bradford | The Rookie
Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven | Part Eight | Part Nine | Part Ten
tw: some suicidal thoughts referenced (one sentence)
-----
“What do you know about your case worker, Kade Sullivan?” Grey said, still keeping his gaze on (Y/N) despite her looking away and back through the glass to watch Tim questioning Diaz. “We believe that he may have had some involvement into how Regina Diaz got to a position to leverage both you and the department.”
“Right. I never really saw Sullivan. He stayed away from me. I met him once, maybe twice. He likes to keep a professional distance.” She slowly answered.
Grey lifted his coffee cup up and took a small sip. “You’re a good judge of character, (Y/N). Did anything seem off about him? I know it was a while back but anything helps.”
“He seemed a bit odd, nervous even. But I put it down to him being paranoid about the operation. I mean it can’t be easy for these caseworkers to not have consistent contact with their UC’s.”
“What do you mean? Did you not check in with him daily?”
“No.” (Y/N) said, looking down. Now that she said it out loud, it was strange that Kade never requested to check in with her and Williamson often. “He wanted weekly check-ups. He never said why though.”
“Is there anything else? At all because the more you can remember, the less leverage Regina will have to bargain with us.”
“I’m sorry, Wade. I really am. I can have a look through some of my journals from that time, I think Tim kept them.”
Grey nodded his head. “Please. I guess it’s now down to Tim.”
-----
“Hello Officer Bradford, I’m glad to see you back in here again after your break. You kept me waiting for longer than I had hoped.” Regina said, posed as a wall of confidence as she had done during every other talk with the detectives. “I found it rather rude.”
“Not my problem.” Tim retook his seat opposite her. He had stepped out when Regina had started to get irate with him, he needed her as calm and rational, well as rational as a drug queen-pin could be, before he could get anything viable from her.
He remembered the day he had arrested her, how helpless and frightened she seemed. She was backed into a corner, but now she had a fighting chance and by God did she know it. “You wanted a deal. Let me say this one more time. Tell us about Kade Sullivan and I’m sure the District Attorney will be nicer to you.”
Regina smirked. “No. I have something you want. So I lay out the terms. You know what I want after our… exchange but I want something first. I think that is only fair, considering your situation.”
“My situation?”
“Oh you know. How (Y/N)‘s being back in LA will cause some problems for you and your colleagues.” Regina watched, laughing softly as Tim’s face twisted in confusion. “You really think that just because I’m sitting in handcuffs that I wouldn’t follow through on my threat.”
“Whatever it is, call it off. Now!”
“How about you do something for me first, Officer Bradford. Quid Pro Quo.”
“Fine. What do you want?”
“I want you to tell me how it felt two years ago when I forced (Y/N) to vanish. How it felt to lose your wife and not being good enough to find her.”
Of all the things he expected her to say, this was one of the last. He had thought that she would have asked to walk free, or a reduced sentence at the least, but she just wanted to relish in his pain.
She wanted to know how numbing it felt for him to filter by day to day, his reason to carry on with each day painstakingly stolen from. She wanted to enjoy the powerlessness he had felt when each lead led to another heartbreaking dead end. She wanted him to be reminded of each day, and how they got more and more painful as time went past. Her demand was a reminder of the nights he would drink himself to sleep because that was the only way he could close his eyes and not see (Y/N) face in his mind.
It was a reminder of how he couldn’t look at daisies without crying, or enjoy music, or find a purpose. It was a reminder that he had become a hateful shell of who he used to be, and that even though she was back with him, he didn't know if he would ever get that piece of his former self back. It was a reminder of how he planned for an easy way out for himself if the grief got too bad.
Regina wanted to remind Tim that she had taken it all away before, and that she could take it all away again. And she wanted him to admit that.
“So, Officer Bradford. What will it be?”
Tim launched himself up so he could lean down on the table and over her, “You should know how I felt. It was probably the same way you did when your husband died when the LAPD raided one of his warehouses. I was there that day. I took him, so you took her. But I got my wife back, but your husband is still six feet under.”
“How dare you!” Regina screeched, as she rattled in the chains, trying to find her way out of the cuffs. For the first time since she had been arrested, she lost her well maintained composure.
Tim took a step back from the table. “Thank you for cooperating. Prison transport will be here for you soon.”
“But what about our deal?! You won’t know what's coming without me.”
“I think we’ll be fine, Ms. Diaz,” Tim kept his back to her as he stopped at the door “because we now know that we were being hunted, so now we can prepare. So, thanks for the heads up. Enjoy prison.”
As soon as the door shut behind him, Tim leant against the door, trying to make sense of what had happened. Surely she was bluffing, they could monitor her calls and her visitation to try to not allow her to give any command, but if she was as intelligent and conniving as she had presented herself to be, she would find a way around it.
As he heard Grey and (Y/N) exit the observation room, he pushed himself off the door. Grey held himself strong, not showing any panic or concern at this stage, but his eyes darted in thought, clearly going over the possibilities of what could happen now. (Y/N) presented herself similarly, except her tell was the fiddling of her wedding band. She used to play with her engagement ring, but due to the dangers of the job and the possibility of it causing harm when in contact with a perp, she quickly replaced it with a plain wedding band, identical to Tim’s.
“So what now? You don’t really believe her, do you?”
(Y/N) moved to place her hand on Tim’s arm. “I wouldn’t put anything past her.”
“Then it’s settled,” Grey said, “We hope for the best and plan for the worst.”
Part Ten | Part Twelve
Series Masterlist | Masterlist
Tags: @xceafh @kmc1989 @buba424 @salty0cracker @iamasimpingh0e
Tags are open :)
#tim bradford#tim bradford x reader#tim bradford imagine#the rookie#the rookie imagine#chiefdirector#bottom of the river
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Hello! So so happy to see you back here, I missed the reactions! I hope you're doing okay!
I don't remember if you've already written this, but I would like to read how HL Characters will react when MC propose to them (such a sappy, I know 😅)
HLC REACT TO MC PROPOSING
A/N: I LIVE for soft sappy nonsense, life needs a little more of it
Everything was perfect. The date, the location, the company. MC had been planning this for months, waiting for things to be just right. Finally the moment came for them to get down on one knee and present their lover with the question that would bind or break them... "Will you marry me?"
~~~
SEBASTIAN SALLOW: He stares a moment, stunned. Then he stamps his foot. "Oh come on! You beat me to it!" His face scrunches into a pout and he folds his arms, turning slightly away from MC. His tantrum abruptly ends when MC stands up looking upset. He sighs and takes their hands.
"I suppose I-...I suppose I wanted to be the one to ask you. See your face light up with delight. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend. I will gladly marry you. The fact you even look my way makes me the luckiest wizard alive." He gently pulls MC to him and kisses them.
OMINIS GAUNT: He processes the question with a stoic expression. His wand examines his surroundings; showing him MC on their knee presenting a ring, even the landscape with his field of 'vision'. He commits to memory every sensation from temperature to wind to humidity.
Perhaps he paused too long, MC was starting to shift. He smiles and kneels in front of them. "Of course I will marry you, my love. I need you in my life like I need air to breathe." He offers his hand to allow MC to place the ring on his finger. He doesn't get a moment to admire it before he's blindsided by a tackle to the ground. MC kissing him through the sunset.
ANNE SALLOW: The breath is stolen from her lungs. She silently screams and moves around in place. The happiness in her heart making her dance. She finally gets her breath back and shouts at the top of her lungs. "YES!! BY ALL THE GODS, YES!"
She can barely stand still enough for MC to put the ring on her. Once it's securely on, she grabs MC's face and kisses them hard, only pulling back to breath before going in for another.
IMELDA REYES: She's internally screaming. Is it too soon? Was she really ready for this? She took the relationship seriously, of course, but now that the question has been presented. She finds herself experiencing what can only be described at STAGEFRIGHT. This was a first. She's never been afraid to perform. She's always had the last laugh. She's always had a quick comeback, she could roll with the punches like no other.
But what does she do now? Are her hands shaking? STOP THAT! Why isn't her body listening to her? How long has she been standing there like a frightened deer? MC is starting to look concerned. SAY SOMETHING! "...Nyoes..." Nailed it.
NATSAI ONAI: "Oh MC..." She's tearing up. She's been looking forward to this for a long time. She takes their face in her hands and kisses them sweetly before letting them put the ring on her.
She takes a moment to admire the ring. It's everything she could ever want; not too gaudy, not too simple. She holds MC close, enjoying the warmth of the moment. "...so who are inviting to the wedding?" She giggles when she feels MC sieze up. Now they get to wedding plan.
GARRETH WEASLEY: He's a little distracted by an herb growing out of a rock and doesn't notice MC was actually on their knee. "I'll absolutely marry you." He responds without looking up. "Would you help me extract this-" He turns to see MC giving him a deadpanned look of annoyance. "Oh...oh dear."
He bashfully puts the rock down and takes MC's hand. "I'm sorry, love. I didn't mean to be dismissive. I get so excited over projects that I sometimes miss what's right in front of me." He places a hand on MC's cheek. "And what's right in front of me is the love of my life. I will proudly wear your ring and call you mine."
LEANDER PREWETT: His hands fly up to cover his mouth and he can't stop the absolute waterfall coming out of his eyes. It's happening, it's FINALLY happening. His mom will be so proud of him.
He doesn't even look at the ring, his watery eyes are locked on MC. He kisses them, getting tears all over their cheeks. Both need to clean their face but it's one of the happiest kisses he's ever given.
AMIT THAKKAR: He laughs lightly and kneels in front of MC. He presents his own ring. "I was going to ask you as well tonight, but you were a little faster." They exchange rings and lay down together under the darkening sky as the stars slowly appear.
He couldn't be happier. This was the best day of his life by far. Holding MC under the night sky they've studied together since they were kids. Feels poetic. His mind wanders to their upcoming wedding. He wonders if he can convince MC to have a traditional Indian marriage ceremony.
EVERETT CLOPTON: His eyes are as big as saucers. He looks from MC to ring and back again over and over to ensure he wasn't seeing things before he thrusts his fist in the air in celebration. "YES!"
He grabs MC, picks them up and spins them around. He dips them and kisses them silly before finally letting them upright to breathe. MC almost dropped the ring. He puts it on before they lose it and smirks. "And people said I'd never earn your affections. Oh, how wrong they were."
POPPY SWEETING: She looks at the empty box MC presented them with. "Was something supposed to be in there or is this a cruel joke?" She asks with a raised eyebrow. She watches MC panic that they've somehow lost the ring when she notices a bush rustling out of the corner of her eye.
She goes over to find a small blue-green niffler. She grabs the small beast by the foot and holds it up to MC. "I think I found the culprit." She tickles the treasure right out of it, and sure enough, a single ring falls out amongst the coins and shiny rocks. She takes the ring and let's the niffler collect it's treasure back.
"I love it, MC." She hugs MC close and looks up into their eyes. "I love you."
The niffler huffs and blows a raspberry at the couple before disappearing into the bushes.
#hogwarts legacy#hogwarts legacy reactions#sebastian sallow#ominis gaunt#anne sallow#imelda reyes#natsai onai#garreth weasley#leander prewett#amit thakkar#everett clopton#poppy sweeting#soft
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! atsv spoilers !
when i sat down in my theatre seat to see atsv im telling you i was being the most autistic fuck you've ever witnessed. you could practically see the sparkles in my eye, dude.
the spot. my godddd he's so silly. the marketing ploy to make him seem like the side villain from the trailers was so fucking smart. I really thought that Miguel was going to be the main villain considering him fighting miles in pracgjcalky every trailer ever and being in the post-credits scene of itsv. and miles dealing with having to be everywhere at once was very realistic and gave me the classic "oh my god this poor boy this is painful to watch". oh and gwen's beginning scene of the drums just gave me the feeling that the movie was going to be fantastic. like, betrayal, amazing visuals, more gwen?? already a wonderful start. also the fact that the spot's whole reason to turn into a major villain is that nobody, not even the person who caused his disfigurement, would take him seriously- like- HUH???? perfect. wonderful. bro just wanted miles to pay attention to him for a little while.
Pavitr and Hobie were also really great additions to the spider team. Despite the fact that Hobie's accent was so thick and deep that I couldn't understand what he was saying a good third of the time, he still managed to work his way into my top 5 characters of the movie. THAT is good character building. At first I thought he was going to be the stereotypical love rival, considering his first mention was miles getting jealous of him and gwen being friends. I was worried that was how the story was actually going to go when he upstaged miles by breaking done the collider force field, but hes actually a really chill and cool guy. pretty sure he even roots for gwen and miles, so that's pretty funny. Pavitr was also super funny with a great character design. " Chai means tea, you're just saying tea tea! " was probably one of my favorite lines / jokes from the whole movie. His world was also very pretty and SUPER detailed. Props to every artist for Mumbatten.
Miguel and Peter B.'s dynamic was really fun to watch as well. This cryptic emo ass mastermind vampire who has watched people die and destroyed a universe next to this middle aged man in a pink fuzzy bathrobe who's oogling over his daughter. also, the line where Miguel said " I've had the right amount of you today " to peter b instead of " I've had enough of you " like the normal saying goes was kinda queer. just saying. but yeah, great villain, and I do want to see him in the final battle against spot, but I eventually don't want him to be the one to beat spot, y'know? If it was to be anyone, it's obviously going to be miles. Whether it's just miles or miles and gwen or miles and the gang gwen assembled at the end of atsv (WHICH HAD SPIDERNOIR YESSS SPIDERNOIR FANS LETS GOOOOOOO I HAD THE STUPIDEST SMILE ON MY FACE WHEN I SAW HIM IM TELLKNG YOU), in the end it's still gotta be miles.
the collider scene with the spot was really cool. spot may be silly, but he's not dumb enough to be " saved " by his archnemesis who only cared about him when he was about to become a transdimensional eldritch horror. boss move. his final form was really pleasing to look at because you can just see the detail that went into it. Looking at some screenshots, I noticed there were a lot of eyes and I'm pretty sure I saw a version of spiderman (original world 1610 peter, possibly?) staring at miles / the audience. despite him not showing up for another hour, hour and a half, I wasn't mad. If a movie can avoid showing the main villain for that long and still have them integrated properly, just, wow. blown away. oh and this part made me even more interested because his beginning ost, spot 1, I think? his random beats and tunes sounded more silly and disorganized and clumsy, like him trying to take the atm. near the end, he got spot 2, which was more shrill and frightening. I'm not musically trained, and I could still tell that it was scarier, and to me, they sounded very similar. To not have too far of a difference between the two and stroke two entirely different chords is just. ugh. wow.
don't even get me started on prowler miles... RAHHH THE CHARACTER AND WORLD DESIGN FOR UNIVERSE 42!!!! it was so beautiful and scary and breathtaking because there is. no. spiderman. when miles's mom didn't know what he was talking about and gwen wasn't really outside, it hit me like a brick in the head. and alternate aaron??? hello??? he made me physically uncomfortable because of how terrifying his face was. i couldnt even tell if he was wearing makeup or he was just that dramatjcally shaded. the turn miles does to see that it was his dad painted on the wall instead of aaron.... GRAHHHHHH
as an aspiring artist, I can say nothing but wow. that movie, the fact that it was 2 HOURS AND 20 MINUTES???? HELLO??? DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH WORK THAT MUSTVE TOOK??? unbelievable. and you know that sony felt bad for making us wait on a cliffhanger, so they probably were around 3/4 done with atsv and started working on beyond, so we didn't have to wait as long as we would've if they finished atsv and then started beyond. I'm so glad that those 5 years in the Sony team paid off, because that. was. amazing. my depression is vaporized. im going feral, going wild, going insane. i will not think of anything else until beyond is out. can't wait to see my bbg spot have his villain moment in March 2024!!! <333
#spiderman#spiderman atsv#atsv#atsv spoilers#miles morales#gwen stacy#pavitr prabhakar#hobie brown#across the spider verse#peter b parker#miguel o'hara#spiderman 2099#spider gwen#spider punk#spider woman#spider noir#spiderman noir
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Hi hi you writing is awesome I was wondering if you could write anything about the shorties of genshin impact with a taller s/o and kinda weird but i was wonderingif you could specifically write where the s/o just likes to randomly pick them up for fun. I always see xiao specifically where it looks like you same height or shorter. I am 5'8 let me pick up the small bois😂
Sure! No problem, ive done a few other characters too. It was fun to write, thank you <3
Hu Tao
She lovingly teases you for being so much taller than her. She's never mean but she has joking asked if you will hold a sign since people will see it easier so high up.
Hu Tao genuinely finds being picked up by you to be a fun activity. She often leaps onto your back playfully <3
"Hehe! im your backpack now, Y/N~"
Kazuha
Kazuha doesn't exactly freak out but he is taken aback when you do it. He won't fight you and after a while, he gets used to it and may start to pick you up and spin you with him too.
"You're so strong, my love"
Xiao
He's never cared about you being taller than him, after all, he feels secure in his strength. (He's into it <3)
He gets really freaked out as he doesn't particularly enjoy being touched out of nowhere. He wouldn't ever hurt you but he does yelp to let him go. He secretly enjoys being held though <3
"H-Hey, let me down"
Venti
Venti actively asks you to pick him up, liking the way it feels so secure in your arms, pressed tightly to your chest. He feels safe enough to sleep right then and there. You being so tall is a bonus for him because he can sit on your shoulders and see the festivals.
"My tall angel<3", "I wish you could hold me forever"
Aether
Oh my god, he's so into it. Honestly, you make him feel very flustered every time you pick him up. I don't know, he just loves it so, so much. Please hold him longer he never wants to let go, you might have to pry him away.
"Oh my!"
Lumine
she sees you guys as the ultimate power couple. She really wants to ask you to spin her for a double attack lol
"Hey, from here, I can see any opponents long before they get close"
Scaramouche
Doesn't enjoy it but lets you do it because he knows you enjoy it and he likes seeing you enjoy yourself. He doesn't feel this way or the other about your height unless you tease him for being short- then he gets salty.
"Says you- I'm not short, you're just too tall!"
Freminet
He gets extremely shy around you all the time, and your randomly grabbing him and spinning him doesn't help his flustered cheeks calm down. He clings to you for dear life.
"S-slow down, please!"
Gorou
Was somewhat intimidated by you to begin with, but now he enjoys the midair cuddles. He may even try to pick you up if he's feeling bold enough.
"I promise i won't drop you~"
Heizou
He literally only has a problem with it if it's impeding his work. Other than that he loves being swooped up into a surprise hug <3
"You're cute, y'know that~"
Razor
He gets a little defensive before he knows it's you. He doesn't quite know why you do it, but he understands that your touches are affectionate and not aggressive.
"Hug?"
Xiangling
She often asks for your help getting things on tall shelves that she cant reach. She bursts into fits of giggles when you pick her up, and clings to you like a koala bear <3
"You're so sweet and cuddly, Y/N!"
Sucrose
She doesn't dislike it but it flusters her terribly when you touch her at all. Be careful, there's a chance she might spill a chemical on you if she's frightened in her lab
"Oh my goodness, I'm so sorry"
#genshin imagines#genshin impact imagine#genshin impact x reader#genshin headcanons#genshin impact fluff#genshin impact#xreader#genshin impact xiao#genshin zhongli
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just because you hate loustat doesn't mean the show is bad news flash
hat- you think I hate-? you think my problem is that I hate loustat??? the main relationship of the show? you actually think that's my problem that I wholesale hate loustat????? oh my GOD I'm so tired of explaining the ship itself is not the issue, it's how the show as a whole chose to frame IPV within that relationship that's my issue. you loustat weirdos reducing the show to a fucking ship is the issue. even if I explained at the start of every post where I talk about IPV in iwtv with a disclaimer that I've spent many mornings over the past few months being moved to tears by loustat fancams and that I dearly love watching Sam and Jacob in these scenes, youse would still accuse me of being an anti or whatever because a lot of you are just racist and acknowledging the show's piss poor handling of IPV would force you to reflect on the fact that your favourite white vamp character is a piece of shit and you don't want that because you're so lacking in critical thought you're frightened you're a piece of shit for liking him. You're not btw but you are a piece of shit for being a dick to people.
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star trek update time. last night we did ds9's "hard time" and "shattered mirror," which, WOW
hard time:
so i knew going in this was going to be an obrien suffering episode but i did NOT expect it to escalate to an ONSCREEN SUICIDE ATTEMPT. JESUS CHRIST
first of all, even real prison would have been less evil than fake prison. argrathans are VILE
kira was so niceys to him when he woke up :( even though you could tell she was super uncomfortable
i read that this episode was originally supposed to be about that lower decks bajoran girl...i'm kind of glad it didn't happen to her, tbh, but also, what did happen to her was still so fucking horrible
episodes that make a great case for why julian bashir can and should join the obriens marriage. he can still see garak on the side!!
i mean was this not julian and miles: the episode?
it was just SO good. everyone trying really hard to help and no one being able to help because obrien is LYING ABOUT IT AND GOD. THEY WASTED THIS GUY ON TNG! FIVE YEARS ON TNG AND THEY GAVE HIM ONE GOOD EPISODE! ONE!!!!!!! HE STOOD AROUND AT THE TRANSPORTER DOING JACK SHIT AND FOR WHAT
i actually thought for a second at the end when they were starving in prison he was gonna eat that guys. tarsus iv blinders. actually what happened was kind of worse
suicide scene. what can i even say except bashir is the most gentle man and good person. and god obrien fucking CARRIED it. five years on tng and i didn't know he could do that except for one fucking scene which was also about the cardassian war
bashir assuring keiko obrien always bounces back and then he almost KILLS HIMSELF.
AND THE THING IS YOU GET IT! he was really scary when he killed his cellmate! he was scary when he hurt quark and almost hit molly! you can see why he would be frightened of himself! it's that moment of absolute rage and then it's over and that guy is dead on the ground and you can't undo it. even though he wasn't REAL and then julian talks him down ANYWAY god i'm actually not even making any coherent sense bc it was just That good. god. GOD.
shattered mirror:
mixed feelings about this one, but mostly positive
i really Don't like how easy it is for characters to hop back and forth between our verse and the mirrorverse. ds9's mirrorverse already takes SO much mystery out of the original, which i could except, but having jake's not-mom and sisko's not-wife pop over for a visit for nooo reason is like. too much really. it should be harder. seeing her should be a bigger deal
about five second after the words "this should be a bigger deal" left my mouth it started being a bigger deal and i immediately took it back lol bc im weak but ultimately thats the kind of writing i'd wanna see for mirror jennifer
i think her using her knowledge of their grief against them WAS fun and evil actually even if it was also evil to me. and jake was already lonely because nog was gone too GOD. hey, also, speaking of nog, why was quark all "oh jake comes down here and pines for nog like every day" like are they boyfriends?? young love? whats going on ds9
speaking of gay people, um. worf and garak. the. the bondage collar. the way we both at the exact same moment had the exact same thought, which was: slave bikini leia. whatever they had going on in this episode was so homoerotic there was even penetration (with a knife).
one thing mirrorverse will do is kill people. odo, quark, rom, and now nog and jennifer. i called both their deaths before it happened but jennifer dying was still SOOOOO. god. at least this time they got to say goodbye?
SO thrilled to see mirror kira again, ik nana visitor was against the evil lesbian stereotype but what if i did wanna see her just lez out now and again? it's pride month i have rights
theme of the evening: mood whiplash. we went from obriens suicide attempt to fun edgy horny mirrorverse worf and garak bondage to sisko and jake's shared grief over jenifer to mirror kira doing ✌👅 at the camera every chance she got. my head was spinning by the end of the night. good for them though
TONIGHT: ds9's "the muse" and voy's "the thaw"
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Lockwood & Co. - Lockwood & Co / GN!Reader
Summary: The Agency Lockwood & Co decide to watch horror movies as group bonding activity.
Pronouns used for Reader: They/Them
Notes: George, Lucy and Reader are friends; Reader is implied to have a crush on Lockwood though nothing too romantic happens; Lockwood also somewhat has a crush on reader which is described a little more; fluff with some descriptions of horror and gore; Reader and George are used to horror while Lockwood any Lucy think it's weird they like it
Authors Notes: I just watched Smile and honestly this is just a description of how I think the different Lockwood & Co characters would react to horror movies. I personally absolutely adore them (and this might be a little bit more of a description of Smile and my personal favourite movie, A cure for wellness, but dw about that) so I wanted to put the characters into the same position. Also this is a little short, sorry for that whoops
It had taken you some time to get the others in on your idea. A horror movie night, of course only as bonding experience and totally not because you wanted to freak Lucy and Lockwood out with your taste in cinematic media. George had immediately been in on the idea, he loved horror just as much as you did, though he was the type to overanalyze and tell the main character what to do, while you rather yelled at them for being a stupid idiot. You knew Lucy and Lockwood both disliked horror. 'We have horror every day, why would I watch that.' was Lucy's excuse, Lockwood simply shrugged and didn't get on the topic again. Sometimes you teased him that he was just scared, by the look on his face every time you joked about it you'd almost think you were right.
Yet now, after days of slight manipulation, the four of you were neatly sat on the couch while you started with some lighter movies - in your opinion at least. Nothing too gory, nothing too crazy. You and George were even able to laugh at how idiotic some scenes were - old school horror movies was always a good start into nights like these. Lucy loudly exclaimed she was more than disgusted by the scenes of blood spill and the usual amount of stabbing, Lockwood on the other hand kept quiet, staring at the screen with a blank expression. »I think they're ready, don't you, my horrendous friend?« George spoke after you lot had finished the second movie. »Ready for what?« Lucy asked, her voice wavering slightly. She seemed concerned, and heaven knew she should be. »You think? Lucy looks like she's about to pass out and Lockwood hasn't said anything the entire time, maybe we should just go to bed–« You started, now worrying about your friends wellbeing, as well as the fact that neither of you all could actually take another late night. »Oh come on, hit us with it so we get it over with.« Lockwood interrupted you, sighing loudly and shifting in his seat ever so slightly. He seemed annoyed, almost as if he couldn't stand this entire conversation. You shrugged. »If that's what the boss wants. Sure.« You moved swiftly to put in the DVD.
Lucy had to leave the movie halfway through. Even George seemed somewhat put off by how it played out. You were the only one in the room that had already watched the movie before. It was one of your favourites, a horror movie that had actually succeeded in making you want to turn it off with how god-awful it was. Not in the bad production way though, in the oh fuck what am I even watching kind of way. Lockwood still seemed unfazed, but that was natural Lockwood fashion, by the way he sat and clenched his fist you knew he was on edge. He only had that look whenever something disgusted and frightened him deeply, like that one time he beat Lucy in Monopoly and she freaked out on him saying she'd quit her job. You were just waiting for a particular scene to play out. The one scene that almost made you hide behind your pillow like a little kid watching horror for the first time.
»I think I'm gonna throw up.« Lucy was stood in the doorway, half watching the movie, half watching the way you bounced up and down like a kid. The scene was brutal, with way too many tubes down throats and way too many eels in human bodies for her taste, so she tried her best not to watch. The sounds alone made the hair on her neck stand up. Lucy could see the way you clinged onto Lockwoods arm – who was still unmoving and actually looked like he was about to fall asleep – repeatedly glancing over at the taller boy to make sure he was still watching. »Good job Luce, you just ruined my popcorn for me with an image of you throwing up.« George sighed, completely oblivious to what was going on right beside him. He had hoarded all the snacks – he seemed to be stress eating – and stared at the screen like his eyes were glued to it. Lucy would never understand how he could like watching people get torn to shreds. She once saw him watch some other movie, you beside him, and he was rambling on about how the Main character would've escaped getting their foot sawn off. Like it was the most normal thing to talk about that! She shook her head, the images of the movies still visible behind her closed eyes. Yup, Lucy Joan Carlyle was getting no sleep tonight whatsoever. »You know where the toilet is Luce.« You mumbled, way too lost in the movie and the way Lockwood batted his eyes whenever something happened on screen. She groaned. »Lockwood, the two don't get it. George is snacking away like he'll die if he doesn't and they haven't let go of you for five minutes since that awful movie started, please get the two to stop this.« Lucy begged. The walls were thin inside the house and with the volume the three of you were watching she was able to hear every fucking thing up in the attic. She wasn't able to sleep anyway but it would be at least nice to have some quiet. George snorted, knocking off some popcorn and effectively throwing it on the ground – Lucy would remind him the next day to clean up. »At least I wasn't too much of a pussy to run out before the actual horror Part started Luce.« He grumbled, slightly glaring at the girl before looking back at the TV screen. You just sighed and firmly got up. »If Luce says it's time to stop, we'll stop, George. I didn't wanna show 'em anyway.« You mumbled, trying to act like it didn't hit you that your friend disliked the movie. Lucy knew it was your favourite by the way your eyes had sparkled the entire time you were watching. Though maybe that could've been because you stared at Lockwood for the better half.
Minutes later Lucy met before mentioned boy in the kitchen, both getting a glass of water before bed. »You liked the movies the two showed?« Lucy asked, raising her eyebrows in question as she remembered how unbothered the slightly older boy had looked. »God's no I was about to pass out if you hadn't stopped them.« He huffed. Now that he had mentioned that, Lockwood did look a little pale, well, paler than he usually was. »Don't tell them though. They shoved their favourite. They told me after you were gone, all the little details and everything.« He looked out the kitchen window, a small smile on his face. »Ew, you're looking like a lovesick puppy. Disgusting.« Lucy joked, softly nudging Lockwood as she put down her finished glass. Lockwood chuckled in response yet he didn't look at Lucy. »Maybe I am.« he simply hummed, grinning to himself.
#anthony lockwood x reader#anthony lockwood#lockwood and co#lockwood netflix#anthony bloody lockwood#lucy carlyle#george karim#george cubbins#lockwood and lucy#lockwood and george#lockwood & co#x reader#oneshot#short story
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Interview with a Bureaucrat Knight
i haven't written anything in ages on account of, mental breakdown etc., but i did play a solo round of For The Queen, which is basically an incredibly stripped-down rp storytelling game with no character creation, no dice, frankly no Anything except drawing random questions that prompt you to build a narrative out of thin air until you get to the inevitable, final dilemma. it's a pretty fun game if you are chill with something rules-light every now and then, and a pretty neat writing tool.
anyway here's 2500 words of deeply unhealthy royal relations and becoming the monster you always hated/feared/loved
The land has been in turmoil for as long as you have been alive.
The Queen has decided to undertake a long and perilous journey to broker an alliance with a distant power.
The Queen has chosen you to be in her retinue and accompany her on this journey.
She chose you because she knows that you love her.
What makes you want to abandon the retinue, and who, besides the Queen, makes you stay?
Fear. Ever since the Queen proposed this journey I have had a certainty that we’re walking to our deaths. It’s not the old fear of the war, we’ve all been living with that so long that it feels like an old, heavy coat. This is new. I can hear doom in every step and dread in every voice. The others won’t talk about it, but I know- they must feel it, too. Nobody dares to quake under the Queen’s gaze, of course, but there are little tells. I think. Glances. Sighs.
I have to stay for them, naturally. There aren’t any other councillors; if I leave it’ll frighten them ten times worse. And the royal guard will never keep the knights in line once they’re spooked, and if they get ideas… Yes, I have to stay. When the nights start leaving- or maybe it will be the nobles first? Someone is going to leave first, or even raise the issue, and then I’ll try to make her see we should turn back. Once someone else… raises it.
…it’s fear to both, then, isn’t it?
When was the last time the Queen embarrassed you?
Ha. As if everyone here doesn’t already know. The very last council she gathered before we left on this accursed journey, when she told us what she was going to do… What she was going to do, I should have seen that, she wasn’t asking for permission or advice, but I… Perhaps I’d seen her look at me and known she’d want me to come with her, I don’t remember. I remember my mouth moving (oh gods, did I interrupt her?) and I wasn’t mumbling, I didn’t stutter, all my well-trained diction was at hand as I asked if surely, we shouldn’t wait until at least winter has passed, or better yet, for the ambassador to return…
All my diplomacy, like blowing bubbles at a manticore. She gave me that look I’ve seen so many times. That look used to make empires cower, and evidently from our recent troubles it can’t manage that anymore, but it damn near dissolved me. In front of all of those over-bred sycophants, shaking their heads and smirking at me as she reminded us all that we are out of time, that inaction is not a blameless road to ruin. Oh, she had no intention to embarrass, that would be beneath her. She simply reiterated the facts. But they’ll remember.
How can people tell, just by looking at you, that you serve the Queen? Do you mind it being so obvious?
Looking at me? On a clear day you can hear a councilman coming from two villages away, wrapped up in all this plate and mail. It’s not ceremonial, you know. I wish it was, they can make wonderfully light faux-armour these days. But she won’t have it. She took this throne with no one but a hundred armed and armoured fighters at her side, and she won’t hold it with anything less. A desk job isn’t an excuse for velvet, or worse, silk.
I never used to mind it, in truth. It makes the wispy little nobles sweat, which is nice, but I did appreciate the… message of it. You really can tell a member of her government, her court, her closest confidants by the clinking of their armour, and for a while, when she was… winning, I suppose, there was this air about her. You knew why a hundred soldiers stood with her against a nation, why they won. And every moment sweating in this armour made me feel like a part of that, even if it was just barely before my time.
But, well. We’re not winning anymore.
The Queen has a pet name for you. Do you appreciate it?
No. And no. I mean, not- Next question, please.
…
Look, it’s not even my pet name, for a start. My father was the “Wolf” of the original hundred, and I wasn’t even a twinkle in his eye at the time. I don’t know why she started calling me that; I barely pass my annual basic combat exams, and that’s with bribes. I’ve never run through a battlefield scattering legions by howling like a madman, or torn out an assassin’s throat with my teeth. I write her letters and speeches and try to explain economics to her, I’m barely a lapdog, frankly. Yes, I have heard the joke.
It’s better than “Little Wolf,” which was what I was before I actually started working on the council, but not much. I don’t know why she does it. Even with the armour on, I can’t possibly remind her of him. We both know that I’m never going to be her mighty, steadfast knight. If I was… I wouldn’t be thinking these things, would I?
When was the last time the Queen hurt you?
I did fail one of those exams, once. They gave me a month to shape up or be demoted. For, oh, two hours I decided I didn’t care, that a court that ran itself like a barracks was a waste of my education, that I would pack my things and head for the border of one of our allies (I miss when we had allies) and perhaps stop in a pub on the way. And then I was knocking on the door to her chambers.
It’s a good thing father was dead by then. The shock would have killed him. I… explained to her that being part of her council had been my lifelong dream and greatest honour and I would throw myself on my sword if I were forced to leave it, and she said something very generous, I think it was “Oh, don’t lie to me, Wolf, it’s too early in the morning,” and I thought ah, so this is how I am to die, then.
She told me to come in and sit down and have a drink (which did not improve matters) and over the course of writing my last will and testament in my head I explained… everything, really. Things I had not told anyone, certainly not my father or my poor mother. Some things I hadn’t realised were true until I said them. Many, many things that I had no business saying to a queen. I assume that at some point I must have passed out (from the alcohol or perhaps a sudden attack of common sense) and she, presumably in one of her peculiar moments of kindness, hauled me up and laid my sleeping body on her bed. I assume this because any other possibility is unthinkable.
Well, regardless, when I awoke she was in her full plate mail, the one she lost during that incursion from the South, telling me to get into my regalia and earn the right to keep it. She spent every blasted day of that month running me through drills. I begged her to kill me more than once. At one point I fumbled a parry and her sword caught me in the hip, a “glancing” wound, I was told, though it felt like more of a furious stare to me. She didn’t apologise, but she stitched me up well enough.
That was a long time ago. The scar has mostly faded. I find myself missing it, sometimes.
The Queen once expressed a desire you knew you couldn’t fulfil. What have you done about it?
Well. Back when we were organising the logistics of this… glorified death march (and if truth be told I was doing much of the logistics, she’s never been one for numbers) she suggested… implied, really…
Skip this one too, please. It’s really not anything of much… Well, it’s a desire I can’t fulfil, isn’t it? What could be more irrelevant? Either this little diplomacy mission goes well, or… that will be the end of it. That’s what I keep trying to make her understand, that if we die here- if she dies here, in some desolate swamp or on the end of some assassin’s knife, that is the end. Nobody else is going to gather up a gaggle of knights and seize a throne overnight, least of all some… little bureaucrat in armour that barely fits. The time of fairytales has gone, these are the days of trade embargoes and blockades. No wolves, only lapdogs.
When was the last time you had the Queen’s undivided attention? Do you hope to have it again?
I’m not sure I can even remember. When was the last time any of us could give anything our full attention? I don’t think I can remember a day when a part of my mind hasn’t been consumed with news from the borders, or the treasury. Praying every season that the crops don’t fail. Spending every ball or coronation wondering which of our neighbours will be next to crumble, or attack. I walk down the city streets and see people muttering to each other, glowering at me, are they planning to rebel? I see people laughing, drinking with their friends or playing with their children, if we fail to stay above water how many of them will die for our incompetence?
I used to think she was above those kinds of anxieties. Now I wonder if she hears them louder than any of us. Loud enough to drive her to take any risk if it’ll make them stop. More than loud enough to drown out my voice.
The Queen thinks more highly of you than you do of yourself. How do you know this?
The Queen… thinks more highly of a lot of us than we deserve, I think. She thinks that the world still bows to strong wills, and times of strife only sharpen those wills, instead of crushing them. She has never believed that this journey is doomed, I know that, because she refuses to live in a world where we would allow this mission to fail. When things go awry, and even she must know that they will… she will expect me at her side, baring teeth.
You sometimes think you might be the Queen’s favourite. Why? And why does this worry you?
I… am not entirely lacking in common sense. I can complain, but how many others, even here, have been taught to fight by her, personally? How many would have survived questioning her choice to make this journey, sniggering or no? The nickname grates, but half of the court are nothing but family names or job titles to her, or simply “You.” I have colleagues more experienced with foreign affairs, none of them are here. She has a niece who used to win every tournament in her prime, she isn’t here. Her most decorated general isn’t here, though after that appalling siege debacle it’s a wonder anyone lets him out of the house anymore. By blood, rank and conquest, there are many better than me that I would gladly trade places with in an instant. But she wanted me here.
She’s no fool. She watches the edges of the woods as much as any of us. I’ve seen her counting each cloud of breath in the frosty air, making sure we’re no more or less than we should be. Paying more attention to my inventory reports than she ever did the harvests. But always the same orders, no matter how dire the news: keep marching. Is it favouritism to be doomed to death? Is it favouritism to be asked to face the inevitable, and do the impossible?
The Queen made you feel something you’d never felt before. Do you want it to happen again?
Two generations of my family died for this woman. Not that my grandfather had much choice, or any of the others who were found themselves on the wrong end of a revolution, and I doubt my father envisioned his own end would be as… ignoble as it was. For as long as I can remember, she was there. My first memory is of seeing her, being brought up towards her throne and looking up into that proud, fierce, beautiful face… Her eyes meeting mine.
I was terrified of her. Ten years later studying our history in school I would understand why nobles and generals with armies that dwarfed hers would cower and surrender when she met them on the battlefield. They call it her grandeur or her righteousness or even her divinity. At the time the only word I knew for it was “monster,” and I screamed it. I owe a lot to my father’s war wounds; if they hadn’t slowed him down I think he would have proven he could still chew out a traitor’s throat that day. I think I would have let him, if it meant getting away from her. God’s, but even now I have never felt a terror like it since.
…where is that terror when I need it now? When she looks at me with those eyes now, why don’t I run? I tell myself that this is madness, I want to scream it out, but the sound dies in my throat. She is leading me to my death, so why don’t I flinch when she takes my hand to readjust the grip on my sword, or lays hers on my shoulder so heavy I can feel it through layers of cold steel? If I beg her, will she cut me open again and this time let it bleed until my senses return to me and I can flee like the prey animal I am?
Or will I only wake up again in a bed that is not mine? A fate I am not permitted to escape, only earn?
The Queen is under attack. Do you defend her?
Didn’t I say it? From the very start, didn’t I say that this journey would get us all killed?
I don’t recognise their banner. We’re still too far out for it to be our would-be hosts, I think? But any number of the other kingdoms could have been informed. Perhaps these are even fellow countrymen, writing their own chapter in the story of a band of soldiers deposing a monarch at swordpoint. It’s too dark to tell anything, except that they must outnumber us almost ten to one. We had enough warning to throw together a barricade. Not even she can believe it’ll hold.
Our line is ragged. Any moment now someone is going to bolt. I keep glancing at their faces, whatever I can make out through their helmets and hoods, trying to guess who it’ll be first. We’re so outnumbered that it won’t take many fleeing to leave our line in tatters. That’ll be all that it takes for the rest to scatter, while we still have time. I can see the fear on their faces. They all know that this is no story, no glorious miracle victory will save us.
Hers is the only gaze I don’t meet. I know what I’ll see. But I see a few of them glance past me. Come on, all of you, any of you, one of you must want to live! That’s all it will take, just one to start running. I’ll be right behind you!
Some of them are looking at me now. What do they want? They must know it can’t be me. They must see how she’s looking at me; I can see the way the fear deepens when they turn this way. The more often I scan the line, the fewer of them will meet my gaze. Cowards, every one.
I can feel her hand on my shoulder, sliding down to check my grip. I wonder, when a man goes mad, running across the battlefield, howling and tearing apart anything in his way, does anyone stop to ask whether he was running to, or from?
Any moment now. One of them will run. But they’re running out of time, I’m willing them to hurry, hilt digging into my hand as I glare at each timid face. Hurry, you fools, run! Don’t you know there’s a wolf at your heels?
#i drew a queen at random and i think the fact that the one i got looks v much like a stern kate mulgrew influenced me a Lot#when i first got the pet name question i considered skipping it but decided to power thru and accidentally stumbled onto a thematic hinge#original fic
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Every month we will pose a question and collate responses as a fun and informal little exercise in getting to know each other and spark discussion. This month's question is:
“What genre do you most enjoy writing?”
Tama / @delgumofics: I like to write horror and comedy. Both those things are fun and they really appeal to my interests. Generally when I'm watching movies I gravitate toward those genres as well.
Lacy: I shall categorise my favourite genre to write under the umbrella term of drama. My interests span across too much spectrum, however I notice that I enjoy writing characters narratives towards the scenarios I present in the stories. It is enjoyable, to act almost like a God, and they can act and be whatever I want them to.
Eru / @eruverse: I think I’ve not written under any genre but slice of life? I already love writing domestic situations but slice of life serves me well as it provides a neutral setting for me to explore characters and their interactions. Basically, my whole shtick is character building, and I find that you don’t really need complex plots to effectively do this. My characters are well rounded even in very simple mundane situations!
Mossman / @one-more-mossman: I never thought about it, but I think I usually write slice of life stories. Maybe with a dash of drama. They are small, so I guess, they can be called miniatures.
Didi / @teaedon: What I write the most tends to be Drama, Comedy, or both, with more focus in characters interiority over plots. Sometimes Angst, often Horror, other times Slapstick or straight up bizarre (Crack). Something violent or bloody will happen ;) (or immoral, that's what fiction is for)
Yukihitomi / @arthurhonda: My favorite thing to write tends to be Romance, slice of life, and comedy. I also enjoy writing tragedies on occasion, but I have to be in the right mood (or need the right music)
Ash / Lutz: My favorite genre to write is drama 💙 I like writing characters being forced to open up as the plot progresses, writing something where "the only way out is through". But then they get a happy ever after, even if it isn't one they started out wanting 💖
WhiteWings / @smuttyandabsurd: I was leaning towards romance and drama as, well… that’s what a shippy author like me writes lol But in recent years I find that I like adding a touch of the absurdist in my fics. It’s not particularly overt nor over-the-top. I just like grounding some of the more fanciful characteristics of the romance/drama genre with something a bit silly. I like comments that point out the slightly absurd moments in my fics, I feel like it has succeeded in standing out then.
Prush / @proosh: Erotica and horror are my passions, because I find they've got a not insigificant overlap. I love horror lurking in the background of eroticism, and I love the eroticism that comes with horror. Interpersonal intimacy is something intriguing and frightening in equal measure and sometimes the author needs to be the scalpel peeling back the narrative flesh to dissect it.
Fed / @fedpawstered: Disturbia, erotica.. usually the two meshed into one strange little amalgamation. I like freakay stuff what can I say
@folightening: Definitely fantasy. I've always loved fantasy, and I enjoy not having to worry about how realistic things are while I'm writing. My favorite thing to focus on is the characters and their relationship to each other but I'm not sure what exactly that falls under. And I've been very interested in trying to write horror recently.
Rui / @reodo: I think my favourite thing to write is probably slice of life? I like writing stories with ensemble casts and lots of drama. Separately, I also like writing Erotica! pwp is super fun to write (especially since I don't have to think too hard about it!)
Sicily: I'd say horror or 'crackfic' (i don't know if it is a genre), and its just fun to do like a horror story with aph Germany x Shrek, oh and erotica even if I'm not good!
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