#i was sincerely wondering if it was a reference or just coincidence

[hanzajesthanza]

this part where they’re in narrenturm and circulos is like “don’t count on your philosopher demon friend who you met coincidentially to break you and your best friend out of prison”:

i was like… heh… this guy hasn’t read baptism of fire 😏🦇🌿

[dark-night-hero]

「Without You」 Zhongli

↳ Part two of Without me in which he was fine without you as long as he get to watch you from afar, safe and sound and above all, happy. (Mentions of self harm ahead.)

Morax first met you in a field full of flowers. The thing is, you aren't there to take care of them. In fact, when he first met you, you were busy pucking them one by one, causing a him to frown, wondering what you were doing.

He have heard stories about you, the lonely one with a nasty attitude, always picking up a fight with anyone who dares to mess with you, there were also a rumor among the gods that you aren't like that in the beginning, but after killing your friends with your own hands, you turn into an approachable, loathsome, alof, ready to kill anyone on your path.

Morax found it amusing, but he couldn't careless, it was none of his business away nor there was something to benefit him if he was to mess with you. So it was really nothing but a strange coincidence that he had met you during one of his walks around the mortal world.

"I do not remember giving permission to a mortal, let alone the god of contracts to come in my territory." You didn't turn around, but he did catch a glimpse of those hands pucking yet another flower in the field. "If you're just another useless god I would be very delighted to kill you right here and now because you just invaded my sanctuary. But I'm letting you off the hook because you're the God of Contracts, Morax."

Leaving was on his mind truly, afer all, he doesn't want to be engaged in a fight with no meaning behind it. Thought it may be a shame to leave this beautiful place perfect for his walk, now that the owner asked him to leave, he would have to leave. That was until you turn around to face him as you said those words. For a moment, his amber iris hidden beneath his hood widen. You look so lonely, lonely yet mesmerizing. "Then will you give me the permission to come in here in some other time?"

Morax, or Zhongli as he was called nowadays. Was left standing on a huge flower field. It may not be as huge as it was when he first saw you, the part where you were at most was still intact. Nowadays when he got nothing left to do around the hardor, he would find himself walking towards the place where the two of you have met.

As the gentle breeze passed by, his brown locks swaying along the direction of the wind. His fingers carefully reach out to touch one of the flowers in the field. This place was not known to many, well, at least to the mortals, as well as the rest of the aduptus. This was your secret sanctuary, after all. Who would dare expect a flower field inside deep down a mountain?

After a while, Zhongli pulled out a pair of gardening scissors. Then he kneeled down and started trimming the stray grass that was slowly growing across the field. This place was left unmaintenanced for so long.

"You're quite persistent and consistent. Don't you have some other things to do?" Across to him was you, just like the first time he met you, you were busy pucking flowers out of the soil. At first it really bothered him why were you doing such thing, but the more he dropped by in here as he took a walk due to the fact that he took your silence as a yes when he ask permission. He noticed that every time you pucked a flower out, it was quickly replaced by a new one. Never once taking his eyes off you, he answered. "I got nothing to do, so I dropped by to see my friend."

That causes you to raise a brow, "A friend? I sincerely hope you aren't referring to me because I will have to blow your head off if you do." By your words, he could only chuckle by your vicious words. Brushing it off, he took a step forward towards you, causing your eyes to go wide. "Stay where you are! You're ruining my garden!" "Relax, I did not step on them." ".... Really? Still wait a minute, I'll pave the way." Just like that, a path was created in the midst of the flower field.

Morax, at the time, was still yet to have friends by his side. In fact, just like you, he finds it hard to trust someone. So you were the very first one. Although it took a very long time for you to open up, as well as he to you, though it may not be obvious.

"No.. no. no no no no. I can't drink anymore, Morax." You said with a giggle. There were the two of you, in the middle of the field were a table for more was placed, Morax never knew it was in here until you tour him in the flowery field not too long ago. "Hehe." Looking at you silently giggling, he couldn't help but to smile, unconsciously moving away a lost trand of (hair color) locks behind your ear. Looking at you all flustered up, he shakes his head side to side with a smile. Maybe he shouldn't have brought that many osmanthus wine. But as you said you've been wanting to have it for a while now, how was he to say no? He barely managed to sneak in the land of the mortals to get you this.

"Hey Morax.." You tap him by the arm to gain his attention, something unless when he was already looking at you. "Did you.. Did you know why I don't have and want to have friends?" You asked wasted. "Because they all dieeeee haha." Then you lean against your palm. "They all leave me alone. They left me all alone. Heh. Hehehehe they should have taken me with them." You chuckle. "Everybody says I killed them. It wasn't me, it was another god." You frown then pout. "I arrived too late to save them. Maybe I did kill them." Suddenly you look at him. "Right? It's my fault that they died."

He just looks at you, not saying anything as he lets you speak, rant out everything you've been keeping. He was planning to let you finish before he speak, but as tears started falling down your cheeks as you chuckle in the middle of your ranting, his eyes widen. For a moment, the always calm and collected god of contracts doesn't know what to do. And it pained him, it pained him to see you crying that he doesn't know what to do.

So you sat there crying, cheeks flushed, mind spinning, Morax pulled you in his chest. And before you know you it, you were crying like a mess on his chest, and all he did was to run his hands on your back, patting you gently waiting for you to calm down as he whispered. "Please don't cry. I don't know what else to do when you cry." Morax doesn't know how long you've been suffering, how long you've been alone, but one thing he knew is that he should have found you earlier. He should have been with you. "I... I love you. Please don't say such words to yourself."

Zhongli blink, then he look down. On the table was now his cold tea. He was just taking a break from cleaning up the flower field when he found himself lost in old memories. With a small smile on his face, he shake his head and picks up the cold tea before drinking it and was about to get back into gardening when a familiar presence arrived.

"Xiao. What takes you here?" "Why didn’t you stop them?" "Hmm?" Zhongli looked at him like he doesn't know what he was talking about, but he know. He knew very well. "Why didn't you stop them from leaving?" Xiao was never the one to confront his decision, well with the exception when it comes to you and his mentor.

"I just don't understand. It's just an accident. Does it really have to come to this?" Xiao asked him he remained silent like always. "We.. we have a different way of grieving." Zhongli manage to reply after a long silence. "So you're just letting them leave like that?" Xiao questioned him. "I thought you love them. I guess I was wrong, Morax." For the first time in his life, Xiao seems to be disappointed on him. And as he left, there was bitter smile on Zhongli's face that was never seen by Xiao.

"You- you don't have to come here every day, you know." You see, after that little drunken session, things have been very awkward between the two of you with you almost hiding from him everytime he pays visit to you. And Morax found it cute and amusing. Knowing you just feels the same way ay him. "Hmm? Really? But I really want to see you." He chuckle.

Just like that, you blush. Turning your back at him. "So I'm thinking about us (First name)." "Us?! What are you are talking about?" Flustered, you didn't dare turn around to face him. "Right. I love you, you love me. We feel the same way towards each other. Don't you think it was time for us to be together?" "You-! Stop deciding things on your own!" "But you kissed me back and cried that you love me too." "When did I do that?!"

It was fun to tease you, and it was fun to love you. In a world where gods were at odds with each other. You were his peace. Without you, it was lonely. Without you, he found himself lost. Be it way of living or loving. It was much better to have you by his side. After all, it was thanks to you that he found the other sides of himself as well as he was even able to make friends with the other gods, something he wouldn't dare do in the part. It was fun, and he was genuinely happy with you.

Strange how little things often remind him of you. Maybe because you were the one to show him the world. Walking back to the harbon on his day off after cleaning up the flower field. Zhongli finds his way home lonely. But it was something he was used to nowadays.

From afar was the city he was fond of. It was the last day of the lantern festival, a festival you came up all those years ago. Something that strongly reminds him of you.

"Mor- Zhongli!" What greeted him was the drunk bard that never failed to make him want to turn around and walk away, pretending not to hear anything. But now what the bard was right in front of him, an osmanthus wine in hand. Who was he to refuse?

It took Morax years to convince you to go out of your lair but what convince you was the fact that he wanted to introduce you to his friends and was thinking of building a nation with you and his friends. Curious on what it was all about as well as the nation he wanted to build, but reluctantly agreed to go out. Thankfully, as he introduced you to his friends, you managed to fit him really well.

"If you keep on staring at them, they might turn into a stone." It was Guizhong, a good friend of his mumble underneath her breath but was enough for him to hear, as if it was on purpose to let him hear causing him to raise a brow, still didn't take his eyes off you who was currently having a conversation with Cloud Retainer not to far from them. It was nice to see you having fun. "If you want to talk to them you know you can just approached them, you know." "(First name) is having fun, leave them be."

Everything was going fine, you were just getting along with his friends, the nation you've built along side them was slowly growing in prosperity. Everything was doing well. Until that happened one afternoon.

By the time they arrived in there, everything was almost destroyed, but what stood out the most was Guizhong fallen figure and your bloody ones. You stood in the middle of that chaos, with your body slowly turning to look at them. You had a horrified look on your as they stood there in shock. They body was under control and by the looks of it. You have just killed Guizhong with your own hands. "Mo-Morax." You cried out. "Somebody.. stop me."

"Mo-Zhongli, was it?" As it was once again his day off, he went back to the place where he find most peace at. Glancing at Cloud Retainer by the corner of the field. He let out a humm, continuing to trim the bush in the flower field. "I heard the news." For a moment, Zhongli halted then he started trimming once again. "I heard they left."

Once again, as if minding his own business, he just hummed in agreement. It's true that you left. Left Liyue for good. "You know." There was a hint of hesitation within her voice. "You can always come after them." "The contract says I can't, so I won't." Spoken by Zhongli as he stood up, dusting off the sleaves off his clothes.

"Morax.." "I go by Zhongli nowadays." "Yes. That was the name they chose for you, rigth?" "That's right." He sigh. There was a moment of silence after that. Then the Cloud Retainer sigh in resignation. If Morax doesn't want to talk about it, then none shall talk about it, though, she new the reason herself. "If don't mind. Can I offer some help?" Although he knew that the offer was tempting, Zhongli shake his head. "(First name).." for a moment there was a longing smile on his face. "They don't like it when someone else handles their flower." He chuckle.

You're slowly loosing your mind and self. Unable to bare the guilt and consequences of killing a dear friend of yours as well as the look of blame and distrust of your remaining friends were slowly eating you out. Although you knew it wasn't your fault, although you knew you where under the influence of body control. It doesn't change the fact that you're mind is clear and conscious as somebody else controls over you. And despite the comfort and reassuring words of your lover. None of it was working.

This time, just like the good old days, you lock yourself inside your lair, call it runnig away or something. The guilt and pain was unbearable, the look of Guizhong as you killed her was hunting you. Although she says it's alright. You knew it wasn't. You. You just want to end it all.

There, as Morax tried his best to break the strong barrier that prevented him from coming inside your lair. There, he found you in a bloody mess. For the first time in his long years of living does Morax felt fear, fear of losing you. And as he held you in his arms, trying his best to patch you up. "Morax?" You barely manage to spoke his name. "It's.. you.." Then you smile. Smile like you're leaving him. "Hey, hey. It's okay. It's okay. I'm here." He spokez holding back his tears. Just a little more and you're fine. "Morax... I'm tired... I don't think... I can... can continue anymore."

"How are they?" "Asleep." Just like that, the Cloud Retainer let out a sigh of relief. It wasn't just her but all the remaining adeptus. "I.." all eyes turn to Morax. "I'm planning on sealing their memories." By the time you wake up again, Morax can imagine how everything would turn out the same way it was before, and worst, you might even doing worst on yourself. "I disagree." It was Streetward Rambler. As Morax turned to meet her glaze, there was nothing but silence, but then she spoke once again. "Doing that is nothing but turning their back on the consequences they have to face."

"I don't plan on sealing everything that happened that day, just the fact that they were being controlled and killed Guizhong would be enough." "That's the same thing!" Streetward Rambler replied, eyes glaring at those amber ones. "My lover is slowly loosing themselves because of what happened! On the first place everything was just an accident!" "Accident?! You heard it! Because they're envious this happened! They wouldn't be controlled in the first place if they aren't feeling that way!"

Then there was a moment of silence, none dared to speak. "Nevermind. Do it." Once again it was Streetward Rambler. Morax eyes widen. "In one condition. Let's make a contract." For a moment, Morax eyes turned cold. "What's the conditions?" He spoke, summoning a scroll. "In exchange of sealing (First name) memories of their involvement in killing Guizhong. You have to stay away from them." "Streetward!" This time it was Cloud Retainer and the other Adeptus that step in. "That's too much!" "Just like how I- we, lost Guizhong. It's only natural that (First name) to lose the only person they love the most, it just happened to be you, Morax." Morax, who has his eyes widen open grit his teeth, "I refuse to fall in such disadvantageous contract!" Morax walked away that day with you on his arms.

That goes on for a while, until you woke up one again and fell hysterical. Hurting yourself in the process, Morax watched you with pain in his eyes. Just like that, he made up his mind. Putting you to sleep, he kissed your forehead. "I'll be back soon, My love."

That day, he signed the contract with the same condition. "Wait." It was Streetward Rambler. "What?" Morax looked at her coldly. It's not like he didn't know where she was coming from, it was his lover that killed Guizhong, a friend of thiers after all. But still. At this very moment as they talked about the contenrs of the contract, Morax couldn't help but to loathe them. "Let me add one more." "What more do you want? Just how much do you want my lover to suffer?" Morax spoke painfully. "I-.. I want to add that if (First name) manage to bring back their memories. The contract would fall invalid." "Wha-?" "What I mean is that if (First name) recalled things on their own. You're free." There was a sad smile on Streetward Rambler face as she said that.

Like he promised, Morax came back to you that night. To you who was peacefully sleeping in the middle of the flower field. Morax carefully approached you, making sure not to wake you up as he was about to do something. "My love." He stroked your cheeks gently. "Everything going to be okay." You look so peaceful right now. "I.. It's okay if you hate me, resent me after this." There was a small smile on his face. "It's okay as long as you're alive and well. I don't care about anything else." He rest his forehead against yours. "You probably won't remember but.." he chuckled and with a quick kiss on the lips. "I love you, forever and endlessly. Only you."

That night, you wake up with a headache. Mind going back into the resent events. Sure you made a fuss, but not as hysterical as you were in the past, probably because most of it was now sealed. That night you waited for your lover to come, but he never did.

"At this point, they'll end up falling for him." The Anemo Archon, Venti nowadays spoke, looking at his friend with a concerning gaze. And his friend, the Geo Archon, just kept looking at you in the distance. You who seems to bright and happy even from afar. It was such a lovely scene to him, even when it wasn't him by your side. "Is that really okay for you? Morax?"

For a moment, he looked away from your figure to give his old friend a glance, only to see that friend shrug and look away from him. For a moment, he asked the same question himself. Is he really okay with this? Without you by his side? But now that he think about it. It's always been like this. "This is enough." "Looking at them from afar like a stalker?" With a glare, the anemo archon mumble an oops and look away.

With a bit of little argument with the Anemo archon, Zhongli finally succeeded on shutting him up by brute force as Venti sulk away in the corner. He looked at you once again. And as he did, your question suddenly came into mind.

Morax, did you ever love me?

With a genuine smile on his face, he answered as he look at you from afar like he always does. "I love you, forever and endlessly." As soon as he said that, he felt a gentle pat in the back, never once looking away from you. "Let's go back." "Already? I thought you'll admire them for at least days" "...." Then he clear his throat. "I just came to see if they're doing fine."

As the two walk away from afar, the (hair color) haired figure turn around, looking at the spot where the two archon just disappeared from. "???"

[ⓒdark-night-hero] 2023°

[thewertsearch]

Ask Comp 01/07

Anonymous asked:i think youre the first liveblogger ive seen to actually remember that orphaner dualscar was eridan’s flarping name?

Mindfang clearly describes the Serkets, so I wonder if Dualscar says anything about the Amporas?

Eridan's greatest enemy does have a duality theme, after all - and he was certainly scarred when the guy stole his crush >:)

@captorations asked:i have terrible news regarding homestuck and the good place: https://x.com/nbcthegoodplace/status/1039908767763259392?lang=en not to mention that. well. the two share more than you've encountered yet. it's very likely not a coincidence. have fun! oh and. re: my ongoing campaign of pointing out the homestuck ancestry of tlt characters. please compare aradia's "i am very much alive and i intend to stay that way" with dulcinea's "i'm not in the river and i won't ever be again"

...oh my god.

On reflection, this makes a lot of sense. Homestuck's fandom is pretty large, and some of its members were bound to be involved in the production of mainstream media. Still, it's wild to see a Homestuck reference - or, technically, a Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff reference - on the official Twitter for a show this big.

And Aradia does have a lot in common with Dulcinea, doesn't she? For one thing, they didn't really start influencing the plot until after they died.

Anonymous asked: Not really important anymore, but looking at what Gamzee has in his Strife Deck, it doesn’t look like he has any ranged options: he’s got the bowling pins, what appear to be a discarded sickle and lance from Karkat and Tavros respectively, what I’m PRETTY SURE is a whip of some sort, and the Zillyhoo hammer. The closest to a ranged weapon in that stack is the whip, or maybe the pins if he’s willing to throw them, but neither seem like they’d work very well against Vriska. Barring some secret power or other plot twist, I think Gamzee would genuinely be the underdog in that matchup. (Which feels weird, because Gamzee’s been mutating into a slasher villain while Vriska’s still very much an antihero protagonist. Usually the power balance is the other way around with those archetypes!)

On the face of it, Gamzee didn't seem to have great odds in that fight - but it's hard to know for sure with this pesky Bard. His Strife Deck contains plenty of cards we haven't seen, and whatever he did to the Black King is still shrouded in mystery. Everything's just so uncertain with him.

@mimescantscream asked: I've really been holding back all this time, but now that we've met the Grand-highblood, it really is extra painful to see a Gamzee who was once incredibly loving of his friends (despite their constant ridicule) end up falling down the path that fate seems to have pre-ordained for him. Was he truly always meant to repeat echoes of the past? Could things ever have gone differently for him?

Yeah, I've been having similar thoughts. His PoV seemed completely sincere, so I don't think his original personality was a fabrication, or anything. I think there is a part of Gamzee that cares about his friends - and maybe even he wants it back.

@jade-harley-real asked: […] I want a rant on the bad doctor from you pls pls pls

Scratch is straight up the scariest character in Homestuck.

What's he up to now? Hard to say since we're not telling him what to do. Guardians can never be told what to do.

The aura of menace he's cultivated is incredible, especially considering he barely even moves. He's playing the entire cast like a fiddle, armed with nothing but a typewriter and his own supercharged brain - and there's no doubt in my mind that his confidence isn't a mask. He knows he's going to win in the end.

English is coming. He's basically already here.

@elkian asked: I'll probably never be a Vriska FAN, but I gotta admit, she really never had a chance, what with the only adults in her life being: a trollvorous spider 1 missed meal away from eating her, Marquise "I do what I want" Mindfang, and Doc Scratch. Some role models! @manorinthewoods asked: So, now that Mindfang has been revealed, here's a question for you: how much of Vriska's Vriskyness is because she's Vriska, how much is because of Mindfang, how much is because of her lusus, and how much is because of Alternia in general? ~LOSS (20/6/24)

This is why I don't think she'd be like this on Earth. At this point, it's obvious that none of her Incidents were the result of her personality as it naturally arose.

I mean, look how anti-Aradiacide she was! They weren't even really friends!

Anonymous asked: ‘AA: there are all sorts of friends to meet AA: ones you already know and ones you dont’ I mean…couldn’t she just be referring to various doomed selves? I don’t see why the dream bubbles would just be confined to the alpha timeline seeing as the furthest ring is weird in terms of time and space

I was assuming that only Alpha Timeline deaths would be preserved by the Bubbles, but you're right - I'm not sure that was a reasonable assumption.

The Horrorterrors seem to eschew the concept of the Alpha Timeline. and, they've coordinated with both Doomed and Alpha versions of Rose and Dave. Plus, yeah, there is no time in the Ring, so timelines are probably meaningless there. Why would it only interface with the Alpha?

If the Bubbles do preserve doomed souls, then we might also run into the John who died to Typheus, and the Jade he couldn't save. That's a pair of ghosts I'd be very interested to meet.

Anonymous asked: If every Aradia comes back from every doomed timeline, the number would double each time, so you could get over a thousand of her with only ten doomed timelines.

Fair point- although, if an already doomed Aradia went back in time again, she'd be double doomed. Is that even possible? Would she die twice as quickly?

@mhafanlol2000 asked: Your issues with quirks and speech-to-text are pretty simple to explain. If a troll were to speak into a non-modified speech-to-text program, it would output text with their quirk. Because they, quite literally, speak in their quirk. Terezi probably isnt actually saying “YOU H4V3 LOST TH3 G4M3”, each number at a time, but the vibes are definitely there. I don’t know, this is hard to describe if you don’t inherently get it.

I think, jokes aside, it is indeed about the vibes.

In the troll intro pages, you get told a little about how each troll talks, and I think that's how we're supposed to translate their quirks to an audible medium.

Anonymous asked: i think ppl in the fandom have over time kinda built up a like, generally separate understanding of quadrants from how theyre described in the "official" explanation. which is like, not representative of how these terms are used in homestuck, but probably more useful for describing Good relationships that Do Not Suck. like basically making moirails equivalent to being queer platonic partners, making blackrom more about having a healthy fun rivalry, that kinda stuff.

It's funny, actually - I don't think I've encountered a single asker who accepts the quadrants as they're originally described.

The main issue is that, with the possible exception of matespritship, we haven't seen a single troll relationship with reflects the infodump's explanation of the quadrants. I think Hussie might just have jumped the gun a little when dropping it.

Anonymous asked: Shoutout to Karkat poking his friends in the background! Terezi (crying over Dave) and now Soloux (talking to Terezi). Karkat isn’t sure what the right response is but wants to be included! Reminds me of actual cats, just putting a paw on you for no discernible reason. @manorinthewoods asked: I'd like to note that Karkat poking Terezi's tears is the same sprite (and same 'poooke'!) as Karkat poking Sollux's burnt-out eyesockets. ~LOSS (12/6/24)

My man just likes poking.

@alicesoinions asked: not much to say just wanted to say I really enjoy your liveblog!!

Glad you're enjoying!

I've actually got a few new followers recently. Maybe I'm showing up in people's recommendations?

@heliotropopause asked: Dream bubbles are pretty neat, eh? Neat enough to inspire half of HtN, I'd bet.

…wait.

Oh my god, you're right. It's literally a River Bubble. They're both located in afterlives, for crying out loud!

Anonymous asked: Wanted to thank your liveblog for reminding me of a lot that I had flat out missed in canon, due to not putting it together or just reading too quickly. Most recently and notably on my mind right now, is that Feferi is the one who set up the dreambubbles!!! I had always thought that they were just a part of the world that readers didn’t know about yet, like how we weren’t yet introduced to Alternia and it’s moons until act 5. This went right over my head and it has me absolutely REELING (fishing pun included just for fef!!)

Feferi truly is the MVP.

I wonder what happened to dead Players before the Bubbles?

They're certainly not the only type of afterlife in the multiverse. Alternia has at least two types of undead, which implies that the Players are very, very lucky to have retained their personhood postmortem. Imagine this was what Feferi looked like in Jade's dream.

Anonymous asked: Knowing sollux, he probably already had coded his tech to recognize if his speech ever changed, and gave himself a different typing quirk for it, long ago. Not because he knew or thought it would happen, but because he thought it would be a fun coding project ((I know nothing about coding))

And yet, you somehow know exactly how we think.

Anonymous asked: Something I hadn’t really thought about, until I started reading this liveblog, is how much VRISKA ((autocorrect decided to caps that and I’m leaving it in lol)) was manipul8ted into a lot of her violence. Scratch pushed her towards vengeance against Aradia, and she didn’t want to go through with it. Did VRISKA ever tell anyone how much of her live she spent resisting these forces, or even really acknowledge it? She didn’t hide Spidermom, and arguably her need to kill other trolls was to prevent herself from being killed. BUT on the other hand, VRISKA voice would make it sound like a compliment “I almost didn’t kill you why don’t you appreciate me!!!!!!!!”

The thing is, VRISKA probably felt a lot of social pressure not to tell people she was coerced into her crimes. That would reveal that she was reluctant to kill, which is the opposite of what the Empire wants.

@manorinthewoods asked: You could have written a great Homestuck if you'd been Hussie. I think your style, if translated from reacting-to-comic to making-comic, would work great with what Homestuck is, and could have made a better product. I think you'd make a cerebral Homestuck, which would have been cool to read, except I would have botched reading it like I botched reading Homestuck in our Alpha Timeline. ~LOSS (11/6/24)

Thank you! I've tried to write before, actually, but whenever I reread my stories, they come off as esoteric, stilted and a little hard to follow. It's not an insurmountable problem, of course, and I really need to take a writing workshop at some point.

I'd love to make a webcomic, too, but my art also leaves a lot to be desired. I can adapt sprites just fine, but original drawings are hard, guys. Did anyone else know about this?

Anonymous asked: i counted just now, and only like 24 out of all 54 paradox space comics have zero spoilers. some of them are certainly more substantial than others (e.g. i counted ones that include jade’s consorts that you havent seen yet as spoilers) but a lot of them have Very Big Spoilers

It would have been awfully messy. I'm probably just going to read it once I've reached the Gigapause of 2013, and no longer need to worry about spoilers.

@bladekindeyewear asked: “Nepeta wasn't trying to pacify Equius, nor did she seem to be fulfilling any rigidly defined 'role' in his life. They just came off as very good friends, and their relationship was much better for it.” Well, maybe we ought to look at it through the lens of real relationships between friends? Once a healthy dynamic and boundaries are established, perhaps Moirails stabilize as long as they’re together.

That's a good way to interpret moirallegence - although, it does raise an issue with the quadrant that I'll be discussing on its own post, once I've finished the comp. There's no point in prehashing what I'm about to say, so I'll see you there!

Anonymous asked: karkats message didn't go through because of trollians narrative awareness feature, where it'll display something different in service of one of the several "all"-seeing entities, of which the reader is one <3 watsonian and doylist explanations are kissing with tongue

Since the fourth wall is an actual, physical piece of technology in this world, this isn't even that far-fetched!

@sashonya asked: So, as the session's timers continues to count down, what do you think will happen after The Scratch?

Beyond 'the session ends', it's difficult to say for sure. I think the two most likely possibilities are that the kids start exploring other sessions, or travel to a location completely outside the current scope of the comic. I am, of course, hoping for both.

@ericvilas asked: "I still believe that out of all the trolls, Karkat’s traits were featured the most prominently in humanity" yeah, I guess even humans aren't free from the effects of carcinization

CG: THERE IS ONLY ONE STEP. CG: AND IT IS ME.

[pascaloverx]

Rewrite The Stars

Chapter One

Summary: One photo changes your whole life, when you accidentally bump into a celebrity and the world starts to believe that you are a couple.

preview chapter two

The night ends up being good, taking away the pain in your head that doesn't seem to go away. Serving at Pedro Pascal's table is much calmer than you thought it would be. You just need to control yourself so you don't ask for an autograph or over-treat him. Oscar Isaac is also here, having dinner with him. You believe they are just friends having dinner together but you don't want to assume anything.

"I don't know what you did, but the manager is calling you. And I'm telling you, he's in a horrible mood." Your coworker speaks close to your ear and you feel butterflies in your stomach. It can only be about the incident with Pascal. You prepare to hear some nonsense.

"If I don't get out of there in five minutes, rescue me. I feel like even my third generation will be insulted today." You say looking at your colleague as if you know you got screwed. She nods her head positively with a look of empathy. You head towards your manager who is standing near the back door, right where the whole incident happened. You're officially screwed.

"Can you explain to me how you cause an accident with a celebrity on the same day that I made it clear that nothing could go wrong?" Your manager says, while you are confused.

"Sir, as much as it seems like it wasn't me who caused the accident. It was a coincidence, nothing more than that." You speak softly, trying to stay calm.

"There are no coincidences in the world of customer service. This is a renowned restaurant, not a corner diner. My team must be impeccable. Your mediocrity offends me to the point that I won't even ask for your advance notice. Remove your things from my establishment and go to HR as soon as possible." Your former manager speaks, with a tone of contempt.

"You are being unfair, I did my best to carry out my tasks with mastery." You speak almost out of despair. This job is all you have.

"What I am or am not is none of your business. Oh, and don't use this work as a reference, I will make it my personal goal to ruin any job opportunity you have." It was at that moment that his emotional shock turned to anger. Resigning is bad, but getting in the way of having another job is too much.

"So if I have nothing left to lose, I'm going to take this opportunity to be very realistic." You speak losing the last bit of control you have over yourself.

"And what are you going to do about it?” He asks, almost mocking your face. You then take the jug of orange juice and throw it at his head.

"If you'll excuse me, I'll leave with the rest of my dignity." You say, turning around and noticing that people in the restaurant have noticed your disagreement with the manager. Everyone's eyes were on the situation you had just been in and you felt embarrassed. You even wondered where Mr. Pascal was, since you hadn't seen him.

"Are you looking for me?" Mr. Pascal speaks behind you, and you jump discretely scared.

"Do you have a habit of surprising others unexpectedly?" You say, composing yourself and walking towards the employee area. Surprisingly Mr. Pascal accompanies you.

"It's not a habit of mine but I think it's happening a lot when it comes to our dates with each other. I apologize if I'm being intrusive." Mr. Pascal speaks sincerely in your tone of voice.

"You don't need to apologize, I may have been rude. This night suddenly turned into chaos." You say it, trying to be as subtle as possible, but the truth is that you're screwed and you can't even hide it.

"I witnessed the scene with your old boss. I must say that despite the waste of a beautiful orange juice, he deserved every drop of that juice." Mr. Pascal speaks, almost containing his laughter, and you feel happy to amuse someone that night.

"Do you need anything, I still work here until I take off my uniform." You say, imagining that he followed you because he needed something.

"Actually, I came to give you something. I know it doesn't make up for your dismissal but I think you You deserve it for your effort." He hands you a piece of paper, more specifically a check.

"Sir. No need to give me a check for the inconvenience, seriously. At the end of the day, this job wasn't the best." You say, trying to return the check but Mr. Pascal doesn't accept it.

"Take it as a tip for causing all this and for you getting fired because of me." Mr. Pascal says, forcing the check into my hands. You smile thinking that you are incredibly lucky of being in the presence of a celebrity that you like but that your boss made you feel as if you were insignificant.

"Thank you, sir. It was an honor to meet you." You say, taking the check and putting it on your uniform, not seeing the amount or anything. Mr. Pascal takes your hand lightly and you feel as if the world stops for that split second in which he held your hand.

"It was my pleasure, I hope that if we meet again, your life will be in a better situation." Mr. Pascal speaks with an unusual kindness, his smile could light up a village but you could only focus on the fact that he was lightly holding your hand. Your hand in his and his hand in yours.

"Good evening, Mr. Pascal." You say it as soon as you can come to your senses. He nods as if accepting my goodnight and then he returns to his table. And you return to your reality.

[psychologeek]

I just think it’s wack that you only care about Israeli civilians. Yes their lives mattered. But instead of focusing on the real reason why they died, ie, the tremendously irresponsible government of Israel and their bloodthirsty colonialist mission, you focus on “”””antisemitism””””” where there really is none. I’m sure there’s like two (2) antisemitic pro Palestinians. The vast majority of us are normal people who want peace and freedom, and for Israel to stop killing people. And for Israeli innocents to stop dying too. Some of us are even Jews who finally woke up. Sincerely, a Jew who’s tired of colonisation being done in our name

So, I wasn't going to reply to this bc. LOL. Don't feed the troll.

But I'm currently hearing explosions in the background so I was like. Oh well.

Let's unpack it.

I just think it’s wack that you only care about Israeli civilians.

I mean. Y'know. אם אין אני לי מי לי? (Clearly not you).

Wow. I'm shocked. How dare I, an Israeli civilian with friends and family who happens to also be, by coincidence, Israeli civilians, dare care about such vile creatures? (Looking outside of the window) (Remember that I can't, bc it's blocked to prevent shattering by airwaves and sharpanels). Must be a day that ends with a y!

Yes their lives mattered.

I feel like there's a "but" coming.

But instead of focusing on the real reason why they died,

Are we still talking Israeli citisens? BC the current causes of death are missiles, gunshots and stabbing.

ie, the tremendously irresponsible government of Israel and their bloodthirsty colonialist mission,

Funny, you keep using that word. I don't think you know what that means.

Also, having strong opinion about a remote teritory which you aren't a citizen of? Tell me more about colonialism.

you focus on “”””antisemitism””””” where there really is none.

laughing out so hard I actually cry. Like, seriously?

Maybe you, personally, haven't met antisemism (or more likely, were unable to detact it). THAT WAS NOT THE CASE FOR THE VICE MAJORITY OF JEWS.

From vandalism and verbal harassment to physical harassment, beatdowns, and at least on one case - death.

[Funny enough, this article says "Alnaji’s and Kessler’s lives forever changed on Nov. 5 at a pro-Palestinian rally at Westlake and Thousand Oaks boulevards in Thousand Oaks." Well yes. Kessler's life ENDED. His poor killer may face prison. Poor man.

This is antisemic.]

I’m sure there’s like two (2) antisemitic pro Palestinians. The vast majority of us are normal people who want peace and freedom, and for Israel to stop killing people. And for Israeli innocents to stop dying too. Some of us are even Jews who finally woke up. Sincerely, a Jew who’s tired of colonisation being done in our name

Sorry, but if your "peace and freedom" refers to the myth of "The Happy Dhimi", you have a problem.

Some examples, though:

This is the official logo of the Houthis, the terror group pro-pals love so much. the "Curse upon the jews" REALLY gives some vibes of love and caring.

As someone who lived through the latest Intifada, this REALLY makes me feel safe out there:

So, the terror Organistion currently firing at me isn't a terrorist? do tell me more

And of course, the "resistence". Wow I wonder what happened on October 7th?

more (explained) #1, more #2, more #3, honestly just go to #antisemitism here.

And, last but not least:

INDIGENOUS PEOPLE CANNOT BE COLONIALS IN THEIR ANCESTORS' LAND.

WE HAVE 3,000 YEARS OF HISTORY HERE.

But, well, I guess you're from america. Strange how you don't care about colonialism when it's actually. Y'know. BY-THE-BOOK.

~

Another case of kidnaps by terror organisation (Boko Haram). And another (ISIS) (Hamas connection).

[fryday]

Hello! Rewatch-anon here with another report. I noticed yet another shift. It comes after the last PINOF react. Dnp are noticeably more relaxed and casual in the videos following it. Some of that was probably due to them getting used to being on camera again and starting to figure out what this new era of Dan and Phil content was going to be. However, I also think that confronting and making peace with such a huge part of their past lifted a weight off their shoulders. I wonder if it's when they got the idea to go back through their history and "take back what the internet took from them" on tour too. PINOF react 3 was when Dan said that they were going to continue uploading on the channel for a while. They packed up the old era and put it in a box and after gamingmas is when the new era of Dan and Phil truly began. Now this isn't a complete shift. There are a few steps backward, but they take several steps forward from here. Most notable for me is the red carpet roast where Dan sincerely compliments Phil several times without playing it off as a joke, using sarcasm, or trying to no-homo it.

I'll continue my rewatch after work and come back with another report later!

anon you are doing god's work for the fandom right now, i appreciate you. i'm gonna start a tag for this, let's call it #shifts timeline ✨ lol. i'll put all of your asks as well as mine and other people's speculations re the timeline under that tag.

so, so far the videos in which we've seen a shift in their behaviour have been:

golf with friends #8 (dan implies he gave phil a blowjob in the cursed hat)

roasting our own red carpet fashion (dnp start acting more relaxed from here)

wdapteo 4 / phil pushes dan's button for 18 minutes (new era of dnp starts)

(re the last bullet point, not sure if you were looking at non-dapg videos too when looking for these shifts so i just put both to indicate the general point in time. lmk tho!)

definitely agree with you that if they became more relaxed after pinof reacts it was because they'd faced and fully embraced their past. i think them reclaiming the narrative especially of those milestone moments in their lives / careers was necessary to set the tone for the new era. like, there's no way they could be this open without being able to reference the people they were and things they had done before - every part of people's current self and their relationships with other people was built on a past version of the thing.

makes sense for the birth of TIT to have coincided with the pinof reacts series, and this anon mentioned how dan brought tatinof up a few times in the first react video, which indicates it was already on their minds. so maybe the pinof reacts series was a trial run of what the tour + the reception to it could be, or maybe just to get us ready for what was coming.

[spectrechosts]

April Fools - Chapters 4-6

More foolin'! Everyone gets crushes on the Queen.

Full Series

DAY 4: PATTERNS AND PAINT

First, the Fool daubs the thick white makeup typical of her craft onto her face, slathering herself with it until every inch of skin is coated and she can hack and spit the portion that made itself past her lips into a rag.

Then, canvas prepared, it is time for art.

She dips a brush in black pigment and stares into the mirror as she draws upon her face. Fake teardrops, bags under the eyes, decorated with points above and below; color the nose, the lips; add lines to exaggerate her frown. Her cacophonous outfit juxtaposed with depressing monochrome.

The Fool then begins her leisurely stroll to the court, jingling with every step, until by coincidence or astute hearing the Queen and her bodyguard intercept and join her.

"Good morning, joy of my days." The Queen greets her, and the Knight gives her a curt nod of acknowledgement. "Your face paint looks wonderful, as always."

The fool mumbles out a greeting in turn, because she still has yet to come up with a witty retort to a beautiful girl calling her things like joy of her days with seeming complete sincerity.

"Could it be?" The Knight asks, eyes wide. "Are we finally free of her terrible squawking?"

"Oh, I hope not." Says the Queen, as the Fool makes a rude gesture. "Things would be ever so dull here without the two of you to make me laugh."

The Knight huffs and crosses her arms as a slight blush crosses her face, and the Fool silently thanks her layers of greasepaint for hiding that same tinge coloring her cheeks.

~~~

DAY 5: BEASTS AND BELLS

The Knight's lips curl into a slight frown as she hears bells jingling merrily towards her and the Queen.

The Fool's arrival is always heralded by bells, and never footfalls, and that puts her on edge to no end because one doesn't come to move like that by accident. The Fool is not a jester by trade, so what is she that requires such dexterity, plucked off the street and placed right at her queen's side?

Nothing good, she's sure.

The Queen emits a tiny, awed gasp of delight as a black cat with a belled collar scampers past them, a pilfered scrap of fish from the kitchen in its mouth.

"Now who might you be?" She says, watching the cat leap across furniture until it rests in a high window, lounging and enjoying its ill-gotten meal.

The Knight relaxes, because this jingling pest is probably less troublesome than the other one.

"We should catch that." She says, as if the Queen is not already cooing and trying to reach the intruder, being ignored all the while. "It has a collar, someone must be looking for it."

"She doesn't like me." Her Majesty says, pouting. "We might just have to wait for her to come down on her own."

The two stand and watch the cat eat, until the Knight notices the Queen looking at her out of the corner of her eye and smirking.

"Yes, Your Majesty?" She says expectantly, and the Queen just looks at the cat and then back at her, smirking wider.

"You don't see the resemblance?" She asks, and the Knight rolls her eyes.

"Well, if you want to point out that your court jester resembles a thieving, flea-ridden pest, I won't stop you." She says, and now it's the Queen's turn to roll her eyes.

"A flea-ridden pest? Come now. I think she's cute." Says the Queen, and her knight isn't quite sure who she's referring to.

The cat finishes its meal and hops down to the ground, purring and nuzzling the Queen's leg.

"Oh! She does like me!" She squeaks, and the Knight bites her tongue.

"God help me if she ever acts on it." She mumbles.

"Hm?"

"Nothing, Your Majesty."

~~~

DAY 6: MOTLEY AND BOLD

The Fool sits in a window, listening to the sounds of rain as she works her way through an armful of bread rolls. She can hear the Knight tromping up to her, decorated armor clanking loudly in a regal mirror of her own motley attire, and she smiles.

"I would speak with you. Privately."

"My my, the Queen is out for nary a day and you turn to me?" The Fool says, still looking out over the scenery. "Thine appetites art truly insatiable. How can she even walk?"

"That is what I would speak with you about, yes." Rumbles the Knight, low and quiet.

"Ah." Says the Fool, swallowing hard and mentally mapping out the least painful landing she could make, were she required to leap from her perch. "This would be the part where you have my tongue, then?"

"My lady would, inexplicably, be saddened to see you bereft of it, so even in her absence I will refrain."

"I've often said mercy is a wonderful quality in knightly sorts."

"Don't play the simpering coward, it's beneath even you."

The Fool shrugs and finally turns to the Knight, looking up at her with mischievous eyes.

"And here I thought I was the lowliest creature you could imagine. You do know how to flatter a lady." She says, and the Knight snorts and rolls her eyes.

"Just tell me what your game is, Fool." She says, bitter. "I'm sick of waiting."

"Game?" The Fool asks, eyes wide. "No game, honored knight. Japes, maybe. The occasional trick. A joke, if the mood strikes me."

"You are unfathomably tiresome. Why are you here? You don't like being a jester. I can tell you're the underhanded sort."

The Fool gasps theatrically, and the Knight just looks at her wearily until she titters and throws her hands up.

"Okay, I am." She says, smug.

"Mm. So what's the game, get close to Her Majesty, and then..?"

"I'm not sure you understand what's happened here." The Fool says, shaking her head. "There was no point at which I snuck into some circus to fake being a performer, Her Majesty picked me. I was minding my business, as confused to see it happen as you are."

"Yes, and I'm sure you arranged for it somehow-"

"Fair knight, what would the fucking point be?" The Fool huffs. "It's been years! Do you think I could not have found a moment to bury a blade in her throat?"

"You would fucking try-"

"Do you think I couldn't arrange for someone to find you burying your blade in her throat?" She asks, and the Knight goes red with fury and embarrassment. "It's an easy life, what do you want from me? I'm comfortable and fed, and all I need to do to remain so is put on the stupid outfit and be a cunt." She says, and then after a slight pause, almost longingly, she adds: "There are worse jobs than hearing Her Majesty's laugh."

The Knight juts a finger at her.

"If you ever give me reason to believe there's more to it than that, if I ever think you a true threat to her, I'll see that you're-"

"Careful." The Fool warns, gleeful.

"Hanged, you crass imbecile." The Knight finishes, before storming off.

"I'm sure the Queen is always happy to see that you're-"

"SHUT UP!"

[stillness-in-green]

Favorite Characters of 2023

Saw this meme template by @limayde and had to drop anything more productive because I Love Character Memes. I tried to focus on characters who particularly signified 2023 in fandom for me, not necessarily just my favorites in any given fandom, and certainly not my favorites of all time! So consider it a reasonable representation of what I read/was reading/was still thinking about last year.

(I'm also relatively sure I could fill this out entirely with BNHA characters, but if I were to do that, it would be with the goal of representing how much I was thinking about said characters in terms of Fix-It Fic(s) Brainstorming, rather than simply how much I like them. Yoichi would be prominent in the former and not present at all in the latter, for example.)

Anyway, after much painstaking cropping, here it is!

(A full list of who all these people are and a blurb apiece of my thoughts on them, as well as the meme template, can be found beneath the cut!)

Most Favorite Blorbo(s) of 2023

Lord Glück and Macht of El Dorado (Sousou no Frieren) – Macht's was the arc that turned me around on Frieren's treatment of demons—he’s so interesting, and so tragic, totally set in his ways while also yearning to change them.  Glück, meanwhile, is so devoted to his word, blunt in his assessment of Macht’s character but wholly sincere about trying to give him the knowledge and environment he needs to change.  My BF asked me for the spoiler-free version of what I liked about them, and the best I can sum it up as is, “A mutual acceptance despite the parts of each other they can’t understand,” and, “They’ve made each other promises that go all the way to end, to the goddamn end.”  Thirty years of that!  I am once again begging on my hands and knees for Frieren to get a second season, and also, if the universe really loves me, to end the first season with a tease for the Golden City.[1]

(I cheated a bit here; the central square is intended for a single supreme fave, not center-mounting one's OTP. I am, however, entirely incapable of picking one of those two above the other. Also, putting them both there does bring the character count to a nice even 50.}

1: A second tease.  There’s actually been one already, a reference to Macht’s enchanted jewelry, squirreled away in some on-screen text—one of the anime’s many additions to the background detail compared to the manga.

12 Characters vs. 12 Months In A Year. Coincidence? Probably!

(Starting at the top left corner and moving clockwise.)

Shigaraki Tomura (BNHA) – 2023 was the year Shigaraki Tomura got his groove back, thank heavens.  While he didn’t get much material in which to speak his own mind—really just Chapters 379 and 411, a full year apart (the latter didn’t officially come out until just a few days ago; we just got the leaks a week early).  We’ll see how he holds up going forward, but even those few scenes effortlessly demonstrate just how profound a waste of time handing AFO the reins to the end game was.  Here’s to not letting Heroes off the hook in the new year!

Iguchi Shuuichi/Spinner (BNHA) – Spent a lot of 2023 worrying about this guy.  Still am worried about this guy.  But him turning the tides of the war at the end of 2022 shifted the whole course of the battle, and new we’ve got Shigaraki invoking The Horizon to finally give us incontrovertible evidence that Shigaraki and Spinner have talked about more than just video games!  2024 is shaping up Spinaraki!

Yotsubashi Rikiya/Re-Destro (BNHA) – I provide fanart for this man because, of course, he was in the actual canon not at all last year, absent a single flashback panel from Hose Face, not at all making up for what a caricature that character was otherwise.  All the good Re-Destro content I was getting last year was thanks to @nickfoo’s wonderful, wonderful fanart of him.  Thanks for continuing to give this guy love, foo! (full art here)

Geten (BNHA) – Himura backstory reveal!  And that revelation accounted for the only fanfic I posted last year at all, as well as being super satisfying in terms of largely clearing Todoroki Enji of the responsibility for the heteromorphobic microaggressions perpetrated by certain of his children, as well as giving us some more hints about Geten and Re-Destro’s relationship.  Exquisite. (Now just let him have something to say that isn’t mostly there to Contextualize Dabi.)

Vamirio/Anne from Management  (Helck) – I reread Helck last year in celebration of its anime, and just to reiterate this again, Vamirio and her determination lead her to make firm stands and fiery declarations about her combat role and priorities that Deku has never even fuckin’ thought about.  Vamirio a best; vote Vamirio for Head of Management.

Samuel Murphy +Hal and Nobu (Canis: The Speaker) – Sam’s my favorite of another inseparable trio, probably because, at least as an adult, he’s the most vulnerable—not simply because he lacks the firearms or goons that his partners’ positions allow them to call to hand, but also because of his struggles with insomnia.  Whip-smart, observant, and well-spoken, and I always have had a preference for the smart ones.

Jasper (Steven Universe) – I started reading @faelapis’s post-canon Jasper exploration fic Something Better last year and absolutely fell in love with it.  It reminded me all over again how much I love Jasper, and how much I wanted a story that gave her all the time she needed to change.

Somei Yoshino (Yakuza Fiancée) – Last year saw the anime announcement and Yoshino’s totally amazing bathtub fight with Azami, which I guess there are cowards out there who didn’t like?  RIP to them but I’m different, I guess!  I’ll watch Yoshino break her terrible suitors’ fingers any time!

Wolfgang Grimmer (Monster) – Reread the back half of Monster last year solely because I love Grimmer and wanted to read his material again.  A perennial favorite, manga and character alike.  I love a man held together with scotch tape, stitches and good intentions.

Boutarou the Pirate (Golden Kamuy) – Probably not my actual favorite character in the series, but I finally got to see him in anime form last year after a maddening wait thanks to the delay in 2022.  Shiraishi’s best ship and a feral merman (look at the way he uses his hair and tell me I'm wrong) that someone unaccountably let walk around on dry land. A+ character.

Sailor Cosmos (Sailor Moon) – Speaking of characters with a huge wait on seeing them in the anime..!  God, I’ve wanted anime Sailor Cosmos since high school, and I’m thrilled to finally get her (and the merch that would accompany her).

Mitaka Asa (Chainsaw Man) – I read the first half of Chainsaw Man a while back, largely on the basis of @robotlesbianjavert’s enthusiasm, and while I enjoyed it well enough, particularly Denji’s assorted travails, I never got super invested in it because, not having to wait week to week for releases, there was never really enough time to get attached to most characters before they got unceremoniously offed.  Whether it’s the week-to-week wait or just that I like Asa as a character more, she’s really done the job of getting me interested in the series.  I love this loser failgirl and I want only the best for her; while I doubt that’s what she’ll get, at least I can watch her torture logic to make sick weapons and have affecting scenes about her own crippling inadequacy issues in the meantime.

36 Others

(As before, starting on the top left and moving clockwise through the BNHA Zone.)

Scarecrow/Spinner’s Number 2 (BNHA) – Scarecrow’s big speechifying moments would have been back in autumn of 2022, but I still loved him more than enough in 2023 for him to make this grid.  He was reduced to a shallow caricature and still had to get knocked off a roof because no one could actually out-argue him, and through all of that unendurable authorial laziness, his potential still shines through for me.  Stan the MLA, MLA 5Evah.

Toga Himiko (BNHA) – The only Villain whose Hero foil plotline is working for me on any level, though a lot is hanging on whether or not she, y’know, lives.  She definitely should have gotten to stab the bejeezus out of Hawks, and Ochaco should definitely go on the run with her once Apple Cheeks realizes that the HeroAca justice system could not possibly be relied upon to do anything other than throw Toga in a hole for a few years before executing her.

Gentle Criminal (BNHA) – The only redeemed villain whose regard for Deku functions at all thematically.  Lady N’s return is hogswash on multiple levels, but I will defend Gentle’s without reservation.

Kunieda + Aoyama Yuuga (BNHA) – Consider these two to be a stand-in for all the thinking I did last year about Fix-It Fic scenarios for this whole final arc.  For example, Kunieda in the canon speaks far too knowledgeably both about and to Aoyama for them to be total strangers, so why not plant some seeds for their confrontations earlier?  I ask the reader to consider this:

In a version of the Edgy Deku arc that allowed the rest of 1-A to get out into the world to help out with relocation efforts, they one day come across a scene of dread: a neighborhood full of corpses and Kunieda’s flowers.  Aoyama has a noticeably shaken reaction, which he plays off as just horror to his similarly horrified classmates, but the truth is that he’s got prior history with Kunieda—AFO didn’t plop corpses in front of his parents to intimidate them (because that’s ham-handed and silly), but bodies were still involved.  They’d turn up buried in the family's fancy gardens sometimes, always heralded by those vivid red-black flowers…

Frieren (Sousou no Frieren) – I was relatively neutral on the title character until the anime came out and I had to suffer through The Discourse about her attitude towards demons (arguments on both sides tending to be poorly considered and ignorant, both of canonical details and real-world relevance).  That made me a bit more defensive of her, but even setting my contrarianism aside, I was also very pleased with how she navigated the manga’s most recent arc.[2]  She’s maybe the first character I can think of who I have actively wanted to write Asexual Representation fic for, if only because my answer to, “Does she Romantically Love Himmel?” is much more complex than just saying, “No, she only saw him as a friend,” or, “Yes, and now she’s going to be sad about her Tragically Lost Love for the rest of her life and we need to write all the fix-it fics about that.”

2: She wants to go home!  Her feelings for Himmel, whatever they are, are of less importance to her than going home!  Despite everything we know about how she perceives time, she still values her “now” more than her lost “then”!  My gloating aside, though, I was far more affected by the sword scene than I was the wedding attire or the near kiss.  Being trapped in a wedding illusion?  Trite, overplayed.  Being trapped in a wedding illusion yet still being able to wrap your hands around your partner’s arm and faithfully guide them into drawing the sword neither of you can perceive?  Now that’s intimacy!

Heiter (Sousou no Frieren) – While I had little overall use for the aforementioned most recent arc of Frieren, I did very much enjoy my favorite member of the Hero Party getting a moment to demonstrate what being The Priest Of The Party That Defeated The Demon King actually means in practice.  Grausam being unable to put him down with an illusion?  Being the only one who could defend his downed companions?  The sheer level of trust he has in Himmel?  A little bit of vulnerability where he’s bare seconds away from getting gibbed by Grausam?  Heiter is the member of the party that we get the least amount of in on: Sein didn’t stay with the party long enough to serve as a point of comparison, and despite Heiter raising Fern, she didn’t assume his role in the new group, like Stark did Eisen’s, nor do her reminiscences about him get anywhere near the amount of screentime that Frieren’s do of Himmel.  So for real, you guys, Chapter 118 was so good.

Edward (Shadows House) – *bangs fists on table*  WORST BOY WORST BOY WORST BOY!!  Anime Edward is pants, but Manga Edward is where it’s at, always keeping Kate scrambling, always coming out on top of his maneuverings against his peer group rivals, just flappable enough that his victories doesn’t look effortless, and engaging enough that his smugness feels earned rather than intended to turn the reader against him.  I have no idea how the story is going to deal with the adult shadows, who are after all still just as brainwashed and wronged by Grandfather’s workings as the kids are!  If anything, they’re worse off, having already been manipulated into losing the “faces” they must once have loved dearly.  Thus, while Kate and her allies certainly approach the conflict with a very Us vs. Them, Adults=The Enemy mentality, the screentime Edward’s own affairs get, fully independent of how they intersect with Kate’s, along with an avowed desire to improve the House that parallels Kate’s, make me hopeful that the authors have something a little more nuanced in mind than, “Free the current victims by wiping out all the previous ones.”

Melinda Desmond (Spy x Family) – The main cast are all perfectly fine, but Melinda is interesting.  Super curious to find out more about the Desmond family dynamics, and I love Melinda bouncing around with Yor. (I swear, though, judging by the collective response to the most recent chapter, the fandom is going to turn me into a Donovan Apologist yet. Only one member of that family has visible scars suggesting brain surgery, folks!!)

Anti/Knight/Gridknight (Gridman Universe) – Always my favorite single character from both Gridman and Dynazenon, and he was characteristically great in the movie as well.  His scene with Akane at the end was only my second favorite beat because, while it’s wonderful emotionally cathartic (more fanservice like this, please!), it’s also kind of muddled thanks to the idea of Gridman!Anti and Dynazenon!Knight being two separate entities. Churlish to hold that against it, though, when it's so heartfelt.

Minami Yume + Asanaka Yomogi (Gridman Universe) – Such a great pairing in their own show—I once saw someone call them forced, which has always struck me as just being too high on Bashing The Hets to see that Yomogi and Yume have a great arc towards getting together, actually.  Seeing them be unabashedly together and happy about it in the film was 100% delightful and deserved. Yume swooping down out of the sky on Dynarex to scoop up her wifeguy boyfriend is my actual favorite beat in the movie.

Hyura (Helck) – Firstly, the dry humor around Hyura is fantastic.  (“Something like an arm grows back simply enough.  That’s just common sense.”  “It doesn’t, right?”  “It does not.”)  Secondly, she’s the biggest badass in the secondary cast.  Thirdly, she and Edil have the designated rival ship dynamic (incredibly rare to see across gender lines in shounen manga), and Hyura holds her own all the way to the end.  Hyura is great.

Mikaros (Helck) – “Yes, we may have lost some assets and I personally shattered the mind of one of our strongest soldiers, removing him from the playing field.  But the important thing is that I personally overcame my trauma, so overall it’s a win.”  What a slimeball.  What a total heap.  And what an excellent example of the end-stage stakes driving the title character's choice in the epilogue! I love Mikaros unreservedly.

Harold Aldo Hughes and Iwaki Tadanobu + Sam (Canis: The Speaker) – Transformation, reinvention, the fierceness of devotion and the ruthlessness of rebirth—I don’t love them quite as much as I do Sam, but they’re also both great.

Hera (Lore Olympus) – Lore Olympus is one of those series I read more because it’s interesting enough while also being blisteringly gorgeous than because I’m deeply invested in the characters, but the plotline about Hera and Kronos really has pulled me all the way into active, character-specific interest.  Great, tense, painful stuff.  Can’t wait to see where she goes following recent events.

Redcloak (Order of the Stick) – His last really insightful and heartwrenching scene was in the year before last—that fantastic exchange with Oona!—but for as long as I’m reading OOTS, Redcloak is going to be a favorite.  God, the Law Elemental summoning is so funny.

Hyness (Kirby franchise) – This one’s entirely on my sis-in-law—like another character further down the list, I am not remotely “in” the Kirby fandom.  But what can I say—tell me about a warped cult leader who started in a bad place and only got worse who still managed to get saved by the Hero taking a leap of faith that paid off, and tell me the fandom calls him a horrible abuser?  Sorry, but I Have No Choice But To Stan. (full art here)

Lafcadio Boone (The Sexy Brutale) – Replayed this again last year, and it’s still great.  In a sense, despite its sizeable named cast, it really only has the one character, and his story is such that I want to make every single person on tumblr that gets hyperbolic about the forgiveness and redemption of fictional wrongdoers play this game.  “Time to move on, old man,” indeed.

Sissel (Ghost Trick) – Finally got the remaster of this and replayed it, and it’s also still great.  Knowing The Spoilers about Sissel seriously make replays such a scream, but also man is this game really sitting on some completely over-the-top darkness not at all far beneath its candy apple red and Matrix-text green surface.

Pavitr Prabhakar/Spider-Man India (Across the Spider-Verse) – Strictly in terms of character writing, he’s very fun, but I don’t think he’s as strong as Spider-Punk or Miguel O'Hara, but on the other hand, he’s so much fun, especially to simply watch in motion.  Most of the rest of the leads, however varied their artstyles might be, still feel like they move in basically the same ways, just with varying levels of grace vs. power, intent vs. controlled collapse, but because of the way Pavitr uses his thread, he moves completely differently, and it’s just a ton of fun to watch.  The first character I went hunting for fanart of when I got out of the movie theater.

Gwen Stacy/Spider-Woman (Across the Spider-Verse) – I have outstanding affection for Spider-Gwen from reading her comics back when, but that opening Vulture fight, the fantastic look of her dimension, and all the trans signaling kept her right at the top, too.

Brutha (Discworld: Small Gods) – @codenamesazanka read this and a few of the Watch books last year, prompting me to do some rereads as well, and Brutha and Small Gods remain very dear to me.  I only wish more artists would draw versions of him that remotely resemble “fat, simple-looking young man from a desert country in fantasy!expy!Middle East” rather than “suspiciously trim and Benedictine.”

Sam Vimes (Discworld series) – Ditto on Nal’s read above, but also chatted with foo a lot about this guy, and he’s been my favorite single character in the series since high school.  It takes very little to prompt me to reread his books generally, but last year was the first time I’ve had it in me to reread Snuff, as it was previously a little too tied up in my feelings about the last few books prior to Pratchett’s death.  Regardless of anything else, though, Snuff is the book for Sam/Sybil.

Mina Murray (#DRCL: Midnight Children) – Discovered this lush chonk of horror phantasmagoria last year and I’m kind of in love with it.  Its take on Mina anchors it well—she’s smart and fiery but up against ingrained sexism and classism in her setting, and not too Anachronistic Grrl Power to not be hurt by that sometimes; she’s stubborn, but vulnerable to the supernatural horrors in the way any child would be.  An unreliable but intriguing and sympathetic narrator.

Capone Bege (One Piece) – The other character I got onto largely without getting into the series he hails from, nickfoo—whose art I again use to illustrate—does great work with this guy, a once-jovial monster shocked back from that moral brink by marriage and fatherhood.  Still gets a bit Into It at work, but tries not to bring it home, at least as much as that can be avoided when carrying both family and crew around in the same heart/sub-dimensional space.  (Also, foo’s version of Bege is great, but her rendition of Chiffon is—speaking as someone who doesn’t read the series and can only gauge by image search or skimming the wiki—borderline miraculous, accurate to Oda’s lively caricature design, but so much more sensitive, expressive and human.)

Prince Kazu/Lady Chikako (Ooku: The Inner Chambers) – On the occasion of the Netflix anime, I finally tracked down and finished Ooku last year, and when I tell you that I laughed more and harder in the final arc than I did through the entire rest of the series combined…  The Kyoto cast members are a big part of why,[3] and none more delightful than the stuffy, prideful, possessive, and deeply impetuous Chikako, one of the most singularly human characters in the whole 19-volume melodrama.

3: Catty ex-male prostitute turned head of the Inner Chambers Takiyama is the other part of this equation, by the way.

Gao Shun (The Apothecary Diaries) – Long-suffering stoics are my absolute favorite type, and that holds true even though Gao Shun's stoicism has been largely a humorous beat thus far.  I want this guy to get more attention, but until then, I will continue to enjoy his weary exasperation every time he has to deal with Mao Mao’s eccentricities/Jinshi’s enthusiasm about same.

Mao Mao (The Apothecary Diaries) – Best female character of the season, for sure, but I’ve been reading one of the manga for a while now, and she’s a regular delight.  Eccentric and ruthless by turns, painfully aware of the limitations of her position and yet wholly willing to make her own decisions and exert her own agency within those limitations without ever concerning herself with whether she should ask permission from or report to someone above her rank.  Mao Mao’s mercy takes the form of knowing when to speak and when to demure, and every time I see some stuck-in-their-own-ethical-framework commenter complain about her moral compass, I appreciate it harder.

Accustomizer Stud/Tiffany (Angelic Acceptor Alouette) – Enthusiastically resourceful teenage girl who would probably be super into transhumanism if she hadn’t fallen in with angels (sic) instead, transforming into the gloriously nonbinary pile of muscles and amazing hair that is Accustomizer Stud, Tiffany’s ultimate expression of her inner self.  Stud is magnanimous, gracious, and well-spoken, and they are also VERY LOUD AND FIGHTY.  My absolute favorite character in a game wall-to-wall with great characters.

Yuunagi Tsubasa/Cure Wing (Hirogaru Sky PreCure) – The first Official Boy Cure with absolutely no provisos or qualifications or ways to wiggle out of it, and the show gets him just right by playing him basically completely straight.  Has a costume no one would look twice at in a magical girl line-up, wastes no time on masculine embarrassment at his frills, with the only nod he/the show make towards his gender at all being to frame his role as being a knight to a princess, rather than simply a guardian to one, but it’s not really what he’s about.  His actual character is driven by knowledge, studiousness, and a desire to overcome the limitations placed on him by being a human/pudgy flightless bird fairy.

Kei Miyama (Go With the Clouds, North By Northwest) – Something of a stand-in for his series generally, which I read the two most recent volumes of last year and fell in love with all over again—particularly the most recent one, which switches deftly between depictions of shattering, world-hollowing grief and the beguiling intimacy of the rhythms of life and nature.  But my love for the manga itself aside, Kei’s a great protagonist, full of little contradictions and snags that make him feel much more fleshed out and grounded than your average animanga male lead, even as he’s running around doing very Animanga Male Lead Things, like solving mysteries by using his Strange Power to get information a normal person could not.

Lord El-Melloi II/Waver Velvet (Fate franchise) – Waver is possibly my favorite character of all time in any medium, so it takes very little to rekindle the love.  In last year's case, it took the Fate/strange Fake special!  Love to see my boy continue to wrest more narrative space for himself than he was originally allotted by virtue of being a run-away audience favorite of the Fate/Zero anime!

Ivan (Giant Robo: The Day the Earth Stood Still) – Got the remastered Blu-ray last year as a gift, and guess what?  I still love Ivan in all his cartoonish mini-boss villainy layered over the pathos of tragic loss and resentment.  Honestly, I can only assume he’s as well-adjusted as he is because Alberto is so inspiring to work in close quarters with (mood), because otherwise I’d think it pretty unfair that the sole surviving Bashtarle national in the story gets so little to say about/to the people who blew it up.

Isurugi Camice (Mobile Suit Gundam: Iron-Blooded Orphans) – I was a bit too preoccupied with BNHA meta last year to think much about my prior fandom phase, but I still made time to rotate Isurugi in my mind from time to time.  As one of my beloved long-suffering stoics, I can always make that kind of time for him.  (Image source is from the cover of a doujinshi I have, because melancholy BL doujinshi is definitely more the kind of tonal zone my mental rotations were occupying than they were canon’s!)

And, finally, the blank

(If anyone reading this wants to give it a whirl, I reccommend blowing it up to x2 size; makes the small squares easier to work with.)

[thenightlymirror]

Stephen King exhaustively goes into every conceivable idea of who The Other might be in mid-80's society. He begins humbly with completing the system of German Idealism and talking about the Ground. Gets right into those chthonic gods of the unconscious and the most fundamental Id. And it's just the smell of a basement, the poetic ineffable fear. Then he brings it to the level of society. Derry has lynched a gay man. He starts with queer character as an androgynous clown, and then goes into the history of the town's gay bar, the couple before the murder. Flips it over. Humanizes them.

Whether or not King is a homophobe sort of depends on where you are in the book. It just occurred to me that the empathetic scenes about Adrian Mellon could have been written as an afterthought and placed in the beginning to offset the rest. Imagine It without that murder. You have the bum harassing Eddie for a blow job. Stan unable to climax, unable to father a child. You have the most psychopathic, disturbing character in the entire book: Patrick Hockstetter, who one-up's the previously most-evil character by asking to blow him. What else would the most evil child in Derry want to do? And then there is the revelation that Pennywise the Clown is a woman. Which is a twist, how?

There is a kind of point to that twist. Unrelated to the homophobia.

I feel like the more information we get about Pennywise, the more abstract the character actually becomes. I kept thinking about the (awful) interventions of birds over and over again in the book, and I had the strange thought, "What if birds were all really aliens that flew here from somewhere else? We see them as conventional animals, but they're from beyond." And wondered if these were the first clues that Pennywise was an alien.

100% Correct.

First, there is It the Underneath. And then there is The Transcendental It. And they are the same Other.

See, there is a great thing that King does, where there are a few purely intuitive leaps toward the climax of the book. First, they build a smoke hole and draw blue matchsticks to see who has to guard the bunker. The burnt matchstick disappears, and Beverly goes in with the rest of the boys. When Richie and Mike are cheeching the bunker, they go back in time to the Ago, which anyone who has been catastrophically stoned and found themselves with the profound feeling of being back in personally-ancient time understands. When they see It's spaceship, it's described as being like a burning match head with electricity and blue bullwhips coming out of it.

The burnt blue matchstick disappeared, went back in time, and fell out of the sky as It's interstellar ark.

Does that make sense? No, but it's suggested.

Also, after the Ritual of Chud and the description of (the dead lights) and the boundary of the cosmos made out of an infinity of imaginary stakes manifested by eons of impossible children fighting impossible vampires, in the unmentionable scene which is also the whole point of the book, does Beverly get pregnant? No. It gets pregnant. And who has to kill the babies? Ben. But. What's one of the main coincidences between all the Losers? They didn't have kids. But they did. That's all on purpose. They got It pregnant.

I have no idea what this means.

In the unmentionable scene, sex is described as the absolute negation of (the dead lights). "They break through into the lifelight together." The tunnel to It becomes the wormhole connection between the innermost, hitting the back walls of the outermost. So to speak.

It's possible that Stephen King is just accidentally inventing dialectics while trying to describe some kind of Yin and Yang of the imagination. Like when in interviews he references Marianne Moore's description of poetry as "imaginary gardens with real toads in them". He's both using this as a rule of thumb for how to write horror sincerely, powerfully, insightfully, but it's also a meditation on imagination itself. Horror and utopian joy mirror each other strangely.

It occurs to me that bird is also a stupid slang word for girl, and the implication might also be that Beverly is herself an avatar of It. But I want to make it clear I hate this theory and it annoys me that I thought of it.

I love Ben. I strongly identified with him when I saw the made for TV movie as a kid. His character gets totally sidelined towards the end. Stan gets sidelined for the entire fucking book. Mike is there and isolated from the group almost the entire story, but I suppose in mirroring ways.

It could be a really cool book entirely about the horror of racism in America. It practically is. And it is COMPLETELY insane that every adaptation of the book so far has just decided to forego all of that, all of Mike, the whole deepest point of It, the middle points, where society is It. The amazing chapter that introduces the adult Beverly through her abusive husband's eyes and she is It. The terrifying chapter about Stan and his wife, where her body is It.

The wealth of those societies in which the capitalist mode of production prevails, presents itself as “an immense accumulation of It's."

I think the strange empty romance of Bill and Bev, which is dumped for no reason at the end so she and Ben can be happy ever after, is also on purpose. There were the mere agents of cosmic designs, and they served their purpose. So suck it up.

I've barely mentioned Eddie or Richie. Eddie's scene where he confronts his mother is at that second apex of the book where there's a bunch of great chapters. Richie is so fucking annoying haha. Does racism have to save the day every time? He is also the only character that seems to have been influenced at all by the counterculture of the 60's.

King said that the inspiration for the story was walking over a bridge, and imagining the troll underneath from Billy Goats Gruff. King imagines memory as a precarious bridge between adulthood and the land of childhood/the past. We don't see under that bridge at all, to the 60's and 70's, except through Richie's rock and roll, suggestions of college radicalism. The hallucinations of It have a deep shadow, which is any familiarity with alternatives to established society. That might just be Stephen King. But there's the murdered union men. The "commies" mentioned by Georgie in the first chapter. Bev's feminist friend. I guess the focus on Blacks in the 20's and gays in the 80's is sort of more illuminating that the usual weight given to white navel-gazing in the 60's and 70's.

But the main aim of the book seems to be a classic modernist one. It's about memory. It's about the powerful presence of forgetting, especially. Forgetting has a spooky omnipresence in life, ordinary life, American life. You really can't address it honestly without addressing it's unconscious. Which is why so much of the book resonates, despite not being able to tell exactly why.

[mariacallous]

The Golden Globes is a demoralised brand, voted for and organised by people who, as Tina Fey once joked, operate out of “the back booth of a French McDonald’s”. Still, we have last week’s 80th awards show to thank for Jennifer Coolidge, winner of best supporting actress for her role in The White Lotus, rambling through a speech as hilarious as anything Mike White has ever written for her. Prior to the success of her role as Tanya McQuoid (“Mc-Kwaaaad”), Coolidge – breathless on stage – characterised her acting career as one that had been “fizzled out by life”. Her triumph at the age of 61 isn’t the kind Hollywood often supports. It was an uplifting, joyful spectacle.

It was also a moment of drama the unlikeliness of which underscored the various obstacles Coolidge had to clear to get there. After the awards, the most shared photo of Coolidge was one in which she struck a friendly pose with Jean Smart, who won best actress in a musical/comedy series at the Globes last year for her role in Hacks, and who, at 71, is enjoying an even more unlikely renaissance. It has been stated so often as to be tedious, but that any female actor north of 50 – let alone 60, or my god, 70 – can float back into public consciousness in a form other than the daffy Betty White model, is a rare enough phenomenon to supercharge the celebration.

For those who watch a lot of British TV, Coolidge’s win felt particularly satisfying, perhaps, coinciding as it did with the return of Sarah Lancashire in Happy Valley, a performance that encourages one to conclude that TV shows should be peopled exclusively by middle-aged women (in high-vis jackets). The vibe that animates Lancashire’s performance is one we saw displayed by Coolidge; that is, one redolent of someone who cares deeply and sincerely about her work and her peers, while – I don’t know how either of them pulls this off – assuming a position of being fully beyond giving a shite about any of it.

To this end, the actor broke a bunch of rules about what you do and don’t say in public at awards dos. Over the last few decades, Coolidge’s career has been made up of a patchwork of small roles that were rarely equal to her talent. She had a small part in two episodes of Glee; she had cameos in the comedy sketch show, Inside Amy Schumer; she made an appearance in three episodes of Nip/Tuck. Or, as she put it last Tuesday night, “there were like five people that kept me going for, like, 20 years with these little jobs” – an honest admission of something to which her peers in Hollywood avoid reference to with the fervour of medieval superstition: failure. As Brad Pitt gurned his slightly baffled appreciation from the front row, Coolidge talked, with brilliant, breathy incredulity, about never being invited to parties in her neighbourhood. One upshot of her recent success, she said, was that “my neighbours are speaking to me, things like that”.

The charm of this performance was rooted in what felt like Coolidge’s off-the-cuff stream of consciousness, which may, of course, be just another level of her acting skill. But it’s very weird to watch something as cynical and debased as the Golden Globes and find oneself genuinely moved. It wasn’t only Coolidge’s unanticipated rise, but her tribute to White, creator of The White Lotus and a man who, if Ryan Murphy espouses a certain kind of Hollywood nightmare personality, seems, even after his success, still to embody the homespun decency of Mr Schneebly (White’s role in School of Rock). “He is worried about the world,” said Coolidge, as White got all teary. “He’s worried about people; he’s worried about friends of his that aren’t doing well. He’s worried about animals, all of that.” These moments at awards shows are usually unbearably fake, but I believed her.

There was so much else to love. Coolidge’s reference to the giant hook pulling her off stage at the Emmys (“I thought it left when vaudeville ended”); her early dreams to “be queen of Monaco, even though someone else did it”. Above all, what one assumes was her unintentional rebuke to all the actors a third of her age and half her size squinting up at her with appreciation and puzzlement.

[perfect-homemade-chili]

359 “Golden Mouth.”

Back to chili. You may recall from our imperishable breadcrumb (#361) the notion that true virtue imbues one with supernatural grace and power, and why modern societies stifle us all of our inner worth and true potential. “An honest man is the noblest work of God,” proclaimed poet Alexander Pope. It is no small coincidence why, of the ten Buddhist proscriptions, three of them deal with right speech. It is a subject we take most seriously, having witnessed firsthand the transformative powers of absolute virtue and sincerity… is why the Indian sages of yore would rather die by the sword than lie to Alexander the Great—why mystics East and West (including one of Socrate’s more obscure/radical students, Cratylus, who communicated by gestures only) undertook lifelong vows of silence; Paramahansa Yogananda, in his Autobiography of a Yogi, refers to one metaphysical aspect: that those who persist in speaking truth only can bring all they say into reality. One folkloric example, the ‘golden tongue,’ that comes to mind is the beggar-emperor Zhu Yuan Zhang, founder of Ming dynasty in China who, it is said, as a youth, suffered terrible-smelling oozy sores/ulcers on his head—yet, was endowed with a ‘golden mouth’ that could bring his utterances to reality, including such fantastic notions as statues and broomsticks to life. This demonstrates that oftentimes the first example to come to mind isn’t the best, as he was also known for injecting the faces of his thirty-seven concubines with mercury to preserve their beauty in preparation for his death, then bringing them with him to the grave. Also, like, why didn’t he just utter his pimples away…? Anyway. Even if the proclamations of saints, sages, wisemen, mystics of antiquity seem far fetched today, some super-vague personal anecdotes might just sway you over. I first began a path of spiritual purification over a dozen years ago. One of the first things I did was keep a character-journal—like Benjamin Franklin—and record daily any and every incident of dishonesty or fibbing, the point being to eliminate lies—white, small, accidental, whatever, everything altogether. Even today I can count on one hand I think the number of times I’d actually neglected to read through a Terms and Conditions when it was “required”—(once was for using Uber; I needed to call my parents a ride on short notice). My conduct was far from perfect, but I really, really gave it my all—which, combined with other things (meditation, celibacy, etc), radically changed my life-experience in ways that can only be described as sublime. Many cultures even if they no longer openly admit it believe in physiognomy, that one’s actions and deeds physically alter one’s appearance, for good or ill—I’ve been told I was unrecognizable, but the blessings were even more unusual and intangible than mere appearance. It is pointless to say that we should all strive to be honest, natural, and considerate in our all dealings, everyone knows this, but… I think if people really knew even just an inkling of what secret untold power each of us can connect to, and pursue it in earnest, not only would the world change overnight, but we can also each vastly improve our life-experiences also.

—sandwich#001—I can’t think of a single sandwich that would not go great with chili. In fact, if you’re lazy like me, even a slice of bread will do just fine. One type of bread I’m absolutely crazy for these days is ‘sprouted’ bread. I first tried it simple, lightly toasted topped with avocado, onion, tomato—it tasted so rich and sweet and magnificent. To describe, the bread tastes so fresh, like it is “alive” …which is both a wonderful and disturbing thing to say about bread.

Now many years later, with a mouth inured by mouthwash and a tongue that has srirachaed too much… I find solace in Daves Killer Bread, though I’m pretty sure every insider at Dave’s eating fresh loaves must think mighty fools of us grocery-shelf chomps. Sidenote, I sort of suspect Dave is a mob-boss hiring ex-criminals running a bread ring. There is more that could said so if anything should happen to me the reader has been obliged to bear witness.

[justasleepylittleundine]

Alrighty! I told y'all I'd be coming back to add to this! Granted, I'm just finishing up the OG mission with Hotarubi house (Episode 5, I think????) so I may be missing some insight or context, but I've found that for those who we do have their incantations, almost all of them have some similarity or connection to the demon their stigma is supposedly associated with.

Let's break it down.

Jin Kamurai- Stigma: Bianerus (#24 Naberius)

Naberius appears as a three-headed dog or a raven. He has a raucous voice, but presents himself as eloquent and amiable. He teaches the art of gracious living. He has also been depicted as a crow or a black crane. Concerning his name, it is unclear if there is an association with the Greek Cerberus. It is said that in 1583, Johann Weyer considers both of them to be the same demon. He claimed: Naberius [Naberus], alias Cerberus, is a valiant marquesse, showing himself in the form of a crow, when he speaks with a hoarse voice: he makes a man amiable and cunning in all arts, and special in rhetoric [language designed to have a persuasive or impressive effect on its audience, but often regarded as lacking in sincerity or meaningful content.], he procures the loss of prelacies [the superior rank of clergymen] and dignities [the quality or state of being worthy, honored, or esteemed OR a high rank, office, or position]: nineteen legions hear (and obey) him.

Jin is intent on ousting his father and take over position in the Institute, drawing a connection to the aspect of Naberius that “procures the loss of prelacies and dignities”. Prelacies refer to the high rank of a clergyman or other church-affiliated leader. “The loss of dignities”, in this context, could refer to the “quality or state of being worthy, honored, or esteemed”; however, I believe it refers to another meaning: “a high rank, office, or position”. In other words, Naberius is a demon known to target those in a role of power and influence and thrives off ruining such men and stripping them of their power.

I also wonder if Naberius’s ability to “make a man amiable and cunning in all arts, and special in rhetoric” has any connection to Jin’s stigma forcing others to follow his command; rhetoric meaning “language designed to have a persuasive or impressive effect on its audience”.

Tohma Ishibashi- Stigma: Argeas (#2 Agares)

Agares is a duke "under the power of the east," an "old man, riding upon a crocodile, and carrying a hawk on his fist," who teaches languages, stops and retrieves runaway persons, causes earthquakes, and grants noble titles.

Considering Tohma’s most… impactful attack and use of his stigma literally took down an entire building, I can definitely see a connection to Agares’s ability to cause earthquakes. I also do not think it’s a coincidence that Agares is known to grant nobles titles, and Tohma has situated himself to support Jin in his goal to, for lack of a better word, overthrow and replace his father. Considering Jin’s father’s position, I definitely would consider that a position of prestige and nobility.

Lucas Errant- Stigma: Iggnaim (#4 Gamigan, also known as Samigina)

A marquis who initially takes the form of a small horse before transforming into a hoarse-voiced human. The Lesser Key of Solomon merely leaves his duties at teaching liberal arts and giving accounts of souls that died in sin. The Pseudomonarchia Daemonum, Thomas Rudd's variant of the Ars Goetia, and the Dictionnaire Infernal go into more detail than the Lesser Key, with Gamigin forcing the souls of those who drowned into "airy bodies" to answer questions in either, with Weyer and de Plancy further claiming that Gamigan can do likewise for souls "which dwell in purgatorie (which is called Cartagra, that is, affliction of soules)"

With the information given by a cursory search, I can't find any connection between Lucas and Gaimigan. Will have to wait for developments.

Alan Mido- Stigma: Yagsal Olbalsa (#25 Glasya-Labolas)

He is the author and captain of manslaughter and bloodshed, tells all things past and to come, gains the minds and love of friends and foes causing love among them if desired, incites homicides and can make a man invisible. He is depicted as a dog with the wings of a griffin.

I mean… the “incites homicides”, “captain of manslaughter and bloodshed”... I think that’s telling enough. Though, does that mean that it was only after Alan became a ghoul that his tendency to lose himself in an almost berserker rage developed?

Leo Kurosagi- Stigma: Haxs (#44 Shax)

He takes away the sight, hearing and understanding of any person under the conjurer's request, and steals money out of kings' houses, carrying it back to the people. He also steals horses and everything the conjurer asks. Shax can also discover hidden things if they are not kept by evil spirits, and sometimes gives good familiars, but sometimes those familiars deceive the conjurer. He should not be bothered too often. Shax is thought to be faithful and obedient, but is a great liar and will deceive the conjurer unless obliged to enter a magic triangle drawn on the floor. He will then speak marvelously and tell the truth. He knows when lies are told and uses these to teach lessons. He is depicted as a stork that speaks with a hoarse but subtle voice; his voice changes into a beautiful one once he enters the magic triangle.

There are a lot of connections between Leo and the demon his Stigma incantation is named after. The lying and deception, the reference to theft. It’s also an interesting connection that Shax can discover hidden things, and it’s Leo’s stigma that allows him to learn about Alan’s and Tohma’s secret conversations.

Leo has also been shown to be observant and perceptive enough to pick up on other people's tells and read strangers easily enough.

Shohei Haizono- Stigma: Spurno (#20 Purson)

He knows of hidden things, can find treasures, and tells past, present and future. Taking a human or aerial body he answers truly of all secret and divine things of Earth and the creation of the world. He also brings good familiars. Purson is depicted as a man with the face of a lion, carrying a ferocious viper in his hand, and riding a bear. Before him, there can be heard many trumpets sounding. This demon blows internal trumpets, and is believed connected to the revelator to the Antichrist.

Similar to Luca, nothing really sticks out as a connection between the ghoul and his [hypothetically] demon. Will have to wait and see if the story reveals more.

Haru Sagara- Stigma: Bahnti (#18 Bathin)

A serpent-tailed and muscular man riding a pale horse, who knows the properties of plants and stones, transports people across countries, and rules 30 legions of demons. The German edition of The Grimoire of Pope Honorius describes Bathin (again by the name Machin) as teaching about and providing foreign plants and rocks.

The only connection I can really see between Haru and Bathin is the “transports people across countries” and that’s a very loose connection to Haru’s stigma ability which grants him speed and he’s been shown to carry others. I mean, he literally is always carrying Peekaboo.

Ren Shiranami- Stigma: Raothtas (#29 Astaroth)

“Astaroth is a great and a strong duke, coming forth in the shape of a foul angel, sitting upon an infernal dragon, and carrying on his left hand a viper" he is a demon of the First Hierarchy, who seduces by means of laziness, self-doubt, and rationalized philosophies. His adversary is St. Bartholomew, who can protect against him for he has resisted Astaroth's "temptations". To others, he teaches mathematical sciences and handicrafts, can make men invisible and lead them to hidden treasures, and answers every question formulated to him. He was also said to give to mortal beings the power over serpents.

We don’t know much about Ren’s stigma; however, we see a connection between Ren’s proclivity for doing his best to get out of doing any kind of work and Astaroth being a demon who “seduces by means of laziness, self-doubt, and rationalized philosophies”. These are traits we see Ren exhibit: his proclivity to avoid work of any kind, emphasized moments of self-doubt, and his habit to try to rationalize away his feelings or responsibilities.

Taiga Hoshibami- Stigma: Malab (#51 Balam)

He gives perfect answers on things past, present, and to come, and can also make men invisible and witty. Balam is depicted as being three-headed. One head is the head of a bull, the second of a man, and the third of a ram. He has flaming eyes and the tail of a serpent. He carries a hawk on his fist and rides a strong bear. At other times, he is represented as a naked man riding a bear. His name seems to have been taken from Balaam, the biblical magician.

From a cursory glance there doesn’t seem to be too much information on Balam. Will have to do more in depth research.

Romeo Scorpus Lucci- Stigma: Tiris (#12 Sitri)

He causes men to love women and vice versa, and can make people bare themselves naked if desired. He is depicted with the face of a leopard and the wings of a griffin, but under the conjurer's request he changes into a very beautiful man.

Yet another one where there doesn't appear to be much of a connection aside from a very weak argument that Sitri's appearance as a beautiful man could be seen as a connection to Romeo considering the man's vain temperament and focus on beauty [mostly his].

Ritsu Shinjo- Stigma: Acimo (#53 Camio, also known as Caim)

he is a good disputer, gives men the understanding of the voices of birds, bullocks, dogs, and other creatures, and of the noise of the waters too, and gives true answers concerning things to come.

Ritsu's family status and goal to become a lawyer tied with his temperament and tendency to debate and prove his position/argument could be a reference to Acimo's trait of being a good disputer.

Aside from that, not much else seems to stick out.

Subaru Kagami- Stigma: Talnandio (#71 Dantalion)

He teaches all arts and sciences, and also declares the secret counsel of anyone, given that he knows the thoughts of all people and can change them at his will. He can also cause love and show the similitude of any person, show the same by means of a vision, and let them be in any part of the world they will. He is depicted as a man with many appearances, which means the faces of all men and women. There are also many depictions in which he is said to hold a book in one of his hands.

I think there is room to argue that Dantalion being described as a "man with many appearances" could be a reference to Subaru's time as an actor, as I recall hearing a saying about how actors are people who wear many masks or "faces".

However, I think the line about knowing the thoughts of all people and knows the secret counsel of anyone is a reference to Subaru's psychometry stigma.

Lyca Colt- Stigma: Ramsochisa (#35 Marchosias)

he is depicted as a wolf with griffin wings and a serpent's tail, spewing fire from his mouth. At the request of the magician, he may take the form of a man. He is a strong fighter, gives true answers to all questions, and is very faithful

While I think the wolf connection could be a coincidence, I think it's intentional; along with Lyca's straightforwardness and unhesitating honesty.

Yuri Isami- Stigma: Agnihaet (#48 Haagenti)

He makes men wise by instructing them in every subject, transmutes all metals into gold, and changes wine into water and water into wine. Haagenti is depicted as a big bull with the wings of a griffin

There is definitely a connection between the fact Yuri's stigma stimulates that grey matter and makes him super smrt and Haagenti's ability to "make men wise". And while I haven't met Yuri in-game yet, so my understanding of his character is practically non-existent, the alchemical abilities Haagenti presents with seems pretty on brand with Yuri's theme.

These are just my findings and thoughts after the most minuscule amount of research; however, I think I'm going to look more into this and if I come across anything new or interesting I'll definitely add on to the post!

So I realized a thing...

All of the ghoul's incantations are scrambled versions of a demon belonging to the Lesser Key of Solomon.

Jin Kamurai- Stigma: Bianerus (#24 Naberius)

Tohma Ishibashi- Stigma: Argeas (#2 Agares)

Lucas Errant- Stigma: Iggnaim (#4 Gamigan, also known as Samigina)

Alan Mido- Stigma: Yagsal Olbalsa (#25 Glasya-Labolas)

Leo Kurosagi- Stigma: Haxs (#44 Shax)

Shohei Haizono- Stigma: Spurno (#20 Purson)

Haru Sagara- Stigma: Bahnti (#18 Bathin)

Ren Shiranami- Stigma: Raothtas (#29 Astaroth)

Taiga Hoshibami- Stigma: Balam

Romeo Scorpus Lucci- Stigma: Tiris (#12 Sitri)

Ritsu Shinjo- Stigma: Acimo (#53 Camio, also known as Caim)

Subaru Kagami- Stigma: Talnandio (#71 Dantalion)

Lyca Colt- Stigma: Ramsochisa (#35 Marchosias)

Yuri Isami- Stigma: Agnihaet (#48 Haagenti)

Kaito Fuji, Towa Otonashi, Haku Kusanagi, Zenji Kotodama, Edward Hart, Rui Mizuki have not had their incantations revealed.

However, I am SUPER curious if their incantation signifies WHO they made their demon deal with!!

[independentartistbuzz]

Indie 5-0: 5 Qs with George Collins + Exclusive Premiere of "My Wish For You," Out Today!

Singer-songwriter George Collins has released a brand new single called “My Wish For You”, out today December 1st.

This is a tender love song with strong melodic hooks, written for Collins’ daughters, and the release date coincides with his youngest daughter’s eighth birthday. “

In crafting "My Wish for You," Collins drew inspiration from the timeless and heartfelt compositions of legendary artists such as George Harrison, Tom Petty, and the collaborative magic of the Traveling Wilburys. The song seamlessly weaves together a tapestry of melodic hooks and soulful lyrics, creating a tender love ballad that transcends generations. Collins' ability to channel the spirit of his musical influences is evident in the song's rich harmonies and evocative instrumentation.

The release of "My Wish for You" holds a special significance as it aligns with a momentous occasion in Collins' personal life—the eighth birthday of his youngest daughter. This serendipitous timing adds an extra layer of emotion and meaning to the song, as it becomes a heartfelt gift and expression of paternal love. The tenderness and sincerity embedded in the lyrics make it clear that this isn't just a love song, but a deeply personal and intimate message from a father to his beloved daughters.

As the melodic strains of "My Wish for You" resonate, listeners are invited into a world where love, hope, and musical artistry converge. The song's legacy is further enriched by its ability to evoke a sense of nostalgia, reminiscent of the classic soundscapes crafted by the musical icons who have influenced Collins throughout his illustrious career. Through this poignant composition, Collins not only celebrates the universal theme of love but also pays homage to the timeless craftsmanship of those who paved the way for emotional storytelling through music

As Collins continues to evolve as a musician, writer and devoted parent, his music stands out as a reminder that the pursuit of one’s dreams can lead to a life filled with meaning and fulfillment. 

We also caught up with George Collins for an exclusive Indie 5-0, below.

You embarked on a remarkable transition from a successful career in high finance to pursue a path as an indie musician and writer. Could you share the motivations and inspirations behind this significant career shift at the age of 50?

As I approached the age of 50, several factors encouraged me to make the transition from high finance (the “profit sector”) to being an indie musician and writer (what I jokingly refer to as the “non-profit sector”).  

I was a founding partner of one of the largest investment firms in Central Europe, and around the time I reached my fiftieth birthday our second fund was fully invested, so my partners and I needed to decide if we wanted to raise a third fund – which would mean another ten-year commitment, long hours, high stress, constant travel, etc. as I’d been doing for the previous twenty years. 

My wife was pregnant with our first child at the time, and I didn’t want to miss my daughter’s childhood and the experience of being a hands-on Dad.  

Around that time, I also had lunch with a good friend who had recently retired from a lucrative career in finance to spend time with his young family – he justified his decision by saying, “I can always make more money, but I can never make more time” (a line I stole for my song, “Stop the Sun”).  That remark kind of sealed it for me.  So I met with my partners and we amicably agreed on a smooth transition.

I had a wonderful career in finance and don’t regret a minute of it, but I’m happy I stepped out when I did and grateful that I had the means to do so.

I’d been a professional musician in my younger days, earned a Master’s Degree in Literature and used to do a lot of writing, and as I was turning 50 these creative urges started welling up in me after being dormant for some time, and I knew I had to listen to my inner voice and start playing music and writing again – this was another driving force in my decision to leave the world of high finance behind.

Some guys buy a red Ferrari and run off with a hot new girlfriend when they turn 50, but I decided to stay home with my young family and write songs and novels instead – and I’ve been extremely pleased with my decision.

"It's Been a Long Time" marks your debut music release after a long hiatus from the industry. What prompted your return to music, and how did you find the creative spark to bring this EP to life?

Shortly after I began writing songs again a few years ago, I met a couple of A-List songwriters from Nashville who became good friends of mine.  My original idea was to try to get signed to a publisher – as I lived over in Europe and had a young family at home, I didn’t expect to go the traditional route of releasing albums or touring, so I thought I would write songs for other artists to record.

However, when I played my songs for my Nashville friends, they encouraged me to record and release them myself – which I thought was preposterous at the time.

I was completely oblivious to the changes in the music industry since the 1980s that now make it possible for artists to be independent, but then I started looking into it – virtual and home recording studios, online music distribution platforms, music blogs and social media, sync licensing, etc. – and I got very excited.

Then COVID hit, which of course forced many changes upon all of us.  For me, I found a silver lining in the lockdown, as I wrote several new songs (since I couldn’t go anywhere) and started working online with a producer and recording studio in Nashville to flesh out my demos into fully realized, radio ready tracks.

We were all going stir crazy being locked down at home, but writing those songs and getting them recorded (in between home schooling my two young daughters) was exactly the outlet I needed during that difficult time.  I look back on the lockdown, as unfortunate and unnecessary as it was – as an amazingly fruitful and creative period of my life.

Your music is described as passionate pop/rock with a modern vintage feel, drawing inspiration from artists like The Beatles, Tom Petty, and Elvis Costello. How have these influences shaped your songwriting, and what do you believe sets your music apart in this genre? I listen to and am inspired by a wide variety of music – I love the melodicism of Tin Pan Alley and The Great American Songbook, the power and virtuosity of Led Zeppelin, the insightful lyrics of Paul Simon and Bob Dylan, the sophistication and jazz influences of Steely Dan, the pristine harmonies of CSN&Y, the pop sensibility of Squeeze and XTC, the clever wordplay of Elvis Costello, the passionate blues of Eric Clapton and early Allman Brothers, the Everyman perspective of Bruce Springsteen and Tom Petty – the list goes on and on.  

To me, the music of The Beatles combines and epitomizes all of these elements – no one can match them for the quality of their songwriting across a wide variety of styles and genres.

My earliest memories are of listening to The Beatles’ “Rubber Soul” in our basement when I was a little boy – so ever since I was four years old I have been drawn to intelligent, well-crafted pop/rock songs with insightful lyrics that pack an emotional whallop – and that’s what I try to bring to my music.

What sets me apart from these great songwriters and musicians, perhaps, is that I am writing songs from a more mature perspective and so bringing the benefit of a lifetime of experience to my songwriting, as evidenced by the tracks on my forthcoming EP, “Songs for Grown-ups.”

In addition to your music, you're a prolific writer with two novels, a screenplay, and other creative works to your name. How do your writing and music-making processes complement and influence each other?

What I am learning, through trial and error, is that each format has its own rules and favors different subjects and modes of expression.  

For example, when I was adapting my novel PLAYING THE CHANGES into a screenplay, I had to learn not only the complicated formatting procedures for screenplays but also had to keep in mind that film is a visual medium and a screenplay can only contain what can be shown on a movie screen – so all of the interior monologues and descriptions in the novel had to be cut.  

I also learned through the adaptation process the art of compression, of making the most impact with the fewest words possible, relying instead on visual images and verbal subtext to get the main point of the scene across.

As a result, I am revising the novel to reflect the improvements I made through the adaptation process.

And the art of compression is also something I am learning to bring to my songwriting as well – eliminating needless words, focusing on one main point per song, introducing more imagery, and allowing the listener to connect the dots and create their own version of the song rather than having everything spelled out for them (what Hollywood calls “being too much on the nose”).

My work as a novelist and screenwriter has taught me much about pacing and structure, which are also essential features of writing a good pop/rock song.  What are the plot points, whose Point of View are we in, what is the driving issue to explore, how can we create contrast and surprise, how can we build tension and then release, etc.?  Whereas in a novel these changes may take place gradually from chapter to chapter, and in a screenplay from scene to scene, in a song I’ve got to figure out the role of the Verse, the Pre-chorus (if there is one), the Chorus, and the Bridge (again, if there is one) – each of these different sections has a specific purpose that add to the whole, and respecting those different structural purposes is essential to the success of a song, where you’ve only got three minutes (or less) to make your point and get out.

And of course, one must bear in mind that novels and short stories are literary formats based on words, film is based primarily on visuals (although dialogue and music are also important), while songs are based on a seamless combination of lyrics, melody, harmony, and rhythm.

The length of each format also determines the content:  A short story is usually one scene or at most a series of very short scenes told from a single Point of View, involving at most a handful of closely-intertwined characters, set in a specific place and time, all driving to a climax that illustrates a particular theme; a novel is a much longer exploration of a BIG IDEA, often from a variety of perspectives, usually with many subplots and a wide cast of characters which may be spread out over space and time; a film is the visual interpretation of a novelistic story, focused on dialogue, action and imagery (and occasionally music); whereas a song is  thumbnail sketch of a particular event, thought or emotion, tightly compressed and focused on a specific theme, and specifically intended to elicit emotion and/or get the listener up to dance – ideally, both! 

I keep a notebook filled with all sorts of phrases and ideas, and as I sift through them I decide which would be more suitable as a song, a short story, a novel or a film – it’s wonderful to have so many different formats and creative options! 

Your journey has taken you from Washington, D.C. to Prague, and you've had a diverse range of experiences. How has your global perspective and life experiences influenced your songwriting and creativity, and what messages or themes do you aim to convey through your music and writing?

I have been fortunate in my life to have lived in many different places -- around Washington, D.C., around New York City, Tehran, London, and Prague – as well as my second home in Key West (which is an exotic foreign country in its own right!).  I have also been fortunate to have traveled widely, not only around the US but mostly around Europe, Asia, Africa, the Caribbean and Central America, the Middle East, and Australia. 

Although I have enjoyed and absorbed many styles of music from my expat life and ongoing travels, I don’t think my music sounds particularly international – in fact, I often refer to my music as “Timeless Americana Rock,” and it recalls the music I grew up with from the 1960s through the 1990s.  I am not writing World Music or European EDM or K-Pop or Celtic Harp Reels!

However, my world view and general attitude toward life have certainly been shaped by my wanderlust; my openness to new experiences, peoples and cultures; my respect for the great art, music, literature, philosophy and religious traditions of the past; and a sense of playfulness and curiosity and adventure and optimism that I strive to maintain in my day-to-day life – and this is certainly reflected in my music and writing.

Listen to “My Wish for You” now by clicking this link on Collins’ Website.

Keep up to date with George Collins Band on his website, and social media channels Facebook and Instagram.

[skepticalarrie]

https://twitter.com/youbebrave28/status/1506943854842417154?s=09

Allie Hiii! Have you seen this lyric change from last show in 7??

(maybe you should listen to the video first before acknowledging the changed lyric so that Its not misleading?? It was too late for me lol i saw the cuptions first.)

I mean he totally changed It because "I love you but-" never follows with anything that has the word"home" right?Its "i need another year alone" or "i need another second to myself"

Before yesterday all the proofs i receive is from master posts. so im still a bit in doubt(like im only seeing things that are selected by through the long 11years to prove Larry legit,i never went through any of them myself)

Yet that lyric change(if legit) and every overwhelming contents from yesterday, are what convinced me most because i was totally there and i could totally hear & see It-

(but MAINLY Thanks to your AMAZING achieve. I learned a lot here not only abt those two but also the industry.Nothing could be more helpful!!!! 💚💙)

Well sorry for the long meaningless mumbling.xx

I guess It could count as my larrie original story if you will. I had actually been around the fandom for 2 years now but yesterday was- I feel fully converted.

Anyway hope you have a good day bc you truly is wonderful and patient and skeptical,you deserve all the happiness,Allie❤✨✨

--sincerely,a larrie.

Hi, anon! Sorry I'm just going through messages from yesterday and yours got buried.

x

I did see the video, yes. I reblogged about it earlier. The quality and audio are not great and I haven't found other angles either (because motherfucker asked for people to put their phones away!!!!!!)... so for me, it's really hard to tell. It does sound different, but it's one of those things, I can hear the original lyric "but you know I'm never home" if I have those in mind... the speculation is that he actually says "but you tell me that I'm home", and I can hear that too 😂😂😂 the "tell" for me it's quite clear. So I don't know. Lyrics change are very tricky, people will hear whatever they want to hear. With that being said, the fact he asked totally hyped the song and asked for people to put their phones away speaks volumes to me, plus it could have happened in other parts of the song, but it coincidently happened on the part it says home?!?! It's a lot of coincidences here, so I'm very inclined to think something is up. As for the "I love you but..." part, I haven't seen any videos of that part so I'm not sure what you're referring to exactly.

Other than that, I'm very excited you got your epiphany moment, anon! haha this is exciting. I love to see your origin story unfolding in real time. Welcome <3

[vivianweasley]

Pride and Prejudice (Chapter 5)

Summary: Your father is Lucius Malfoy’s cousin, and after the war, it was really difficult for you to find a job because of your last name. So your mother and Mrs. Weasley came up with a crazy idea. A fake marriage between you and Fred Weasley. 

In this chapter: It’s already the last month of your fake marriage. Is all of this really going to end?

Pairing: Fred Weasley X Malfoy!Fem!Reader

Warnings: angst, misunderstanding, insecurity, mean relatives, reader being jealous?

Word Count: 2.5k

A/N: I apologize for not updating for so long cuz I was feeling burnt out. And I apologize in advance for this chapter, but since it’s Pride and Prejudice themed, I had to include a part like this afghjldfk Also, I may or may not named one of the characters after a Pride and Prejudice character:)

Pictures are from Pinterest. Credit goes to the original owners.

Please do NOT repost or translate my work on any platform! Thank you! Reblogs and comments are always welcome:)

Pride and Prejudice Series Masterlist

Sometimes you would wonder what would it be like if you and Fred were friends when you were still in Hogwarts. And as your mind wandered through these imaginary scenarios, you would also daydream about what would it be like if you went to the Yule Ball with him. But regardless, just being in this moment, dancing with him to your favorite love song, was magical enough.

You were invited to Fred’s cousin’s wedding, along with the other Weasleys. Playing the character of Fred’s wife for almost eleven months now made you a regular guest to all kinds of the Weasley family gatherings. 

As the music played and the guests joining the bride and groom on the dance floor, you and Fred decided to join, too. 

“I’m definitely playing this song at my own wedding!” you were excited when your favorite love song started playing.

“And I’m definitely play something livelier,” Fred smiled as he commented.

“Glad we’re not having the same wedding then,” you glared at him, trying hard not to step on his foot. “I have a feeling our idea of an ideal wedding would be completely different.”

“So what is your ideal wedding?” Fred asked. You looked up at him and realized he looked sincere. 

“I haven’t really thought about it, but a small wedding with my close family and friends would be nice,” you answered. You left out one detail. All you could think of now was what would it be like if you could really marry Fred. But of course, you wouldn’t tell him that, “I’m assuming yours would be something more exciting.” 

“Of course!” If you paid attention, you would notice the blush climbing up on Fred’s cheeks, but you were too flustered by your own daydreams. 

“Let me guess, someone would probably turn into a canary.”

“Very likely,” he replied while twirling you around with the music, “and that someone is probably you!”

You laughed as you twirled. You weren’t paying close attention to your steps, and your right foot tripped your left foot. But you landed in Fred’s arm.

You looked up at him as your heartbeat started to pick up. Your lips were only inches away now that you could already feel his breath brushing lightly against your lips. 

You didn’t know how long has passed as you two both froze on the spot. Just a little bit closer and your lips would be pressing together. You never knew you wanted this kiss so desperately until now, and the fact that this was already the last month of your one-year marriage contract made it worse. You would be lying if you say you have never fantasized about Fred reciprocating your feelings, and this fake marriage could turn into a real one by the end of the year. 

“Fred?” A voice interrupted this moment and your daydream.

Fred pulled away awkwardly with the blush still tainting his cheeks. “Mrs. Collins? Maureen?”  You turned and saw the owner of the voice was an older woman and beside her was a beautiful younger woman, who’s about your age.

“Freddie! I haven’t seen you in ages!” Mrs. Collins pulled Fred into a hug, and when she finally let go of him, her eyes turned to look at you.

“Oh, Mrs. Collins, this is Y/N.”

You put on a polite smile and held out your hand, “Hi, I’m Y/N-”

“Malfoy!” she cut you off, without acknowledging your hand, “I’ve heard that Freddie married a Malfoy. How interesting! How did you two meet?”

The way she said “Malfoy” and her question stung you. From past experiences, you knew this conversation is probably not going to end well. “Our parents are actually old friends, so we met when we were still little,” you answered, hands fidgeting and not looking at Mrs. Collins.

“What a coincidence! Cause Maureen and Fred have also known each other since they were kids, isn’t that right, Freddie?”

“Yea,” Fred smiled, not noticing how your expression froze in an awkward state, “Oh, Y/N, this is Maureen. We used to be friends when we were kids until she transferred to Beauxbatons.”

“Hey, it wasn’t like I had a choice!” She slapped on Fred’s arm, causing Fred to laugh while pretending to be hurt.

Watching them interact so naturally, you suddenly felt like you were interrupting something. A horrible feeling crept up in your mind. What if there’s already someone in Fred’s life, yet you still forced him to sign this stupid marriage contract?

“And Maureen’s an interior designer now! So if your little shop needs a makeover, I’m sure Maureen’s willing to help,” Mrs. Collins suggested. Her tone and expression all reminded you of your mum when she tried to set you and Fred up.

“Oh right! Fred,” Mrs. Collins continued, “come say hi to the rest of the family! I’m sure they all missed you a lot.”

“I would love to, but Y/N...” Fred looked at you. You couldn’t figure out what his expression meant? Was this an excuse because he didn’t want to go? Or did he want to go?

You didn’t know why insecurity started to cloud your brain. Growing up, you always thought you’re proud most of the time, but this was not the case when it comes to your last name. You knew you shouldn’t feel ashamed of it. The history and crime this name carried have nothing to do with you. And you knew feeling ashamed of it gives it power over you, but all you could do was retreating to your shell whenever someone brought up your last name.

So your final decision was, “It’s okay, you can go. I’ll go find Ginny.”

“Great!” Mrs. Collins started dragging Fred to her family’s table. Fred was still looking at you, but then you heard Mrs. Collins say, “Don’t worry about Y/N! I know she probably wouldn’t want anything to do with our sort of people, anyway.”

Your stomach sank. What did she mean by “our sort of people”? And more importantly, what did being your sort of people imply?

A few months ago, you thought changing your last name by marriage could solve everything. But the cruel fact was that it changed nothing.

And maybe it was your insecurity talking, but how could Fred not say anything when Mrs. Collins made such a comment? Did he not understand what she meant? Or did he...agree with her?

After they disappeared in the crowd, you immediately apparate back to the apartment like you were fleeing a monster from your nightmare. That was the only logical move you could think of at that time.

~

“Fred,” you kicked off your heels after you got back to the apartment from work and began rambling on about your day, “you won’t believe what happened today. I-” But the words choked in your throat when you saw another person in the kitchen. You recognized it was Maureen Collins from the wedding a week ago. 

You thought you already forgot about what Mrs. Collins said to you at the wedding, but those words immediately rushed back when you saw Maureen again.

“Oh, Y/N, you’re back!” Fred exclaimed, and he noticed the box in your hand, “Is that my favorite pie!”

“Yea, I didn’t know...” It was supposed to be a surprise, but now it just felt extra when it seemed like they were already cooking a meal.

“Oh, Y/N, I’m sorry we didn’t tell you earlier. This was really last-minute,” Maureen explained.

“Yea, Maureen was here to help with the makeover of the shop, and it’s almost dinner time when we were done, so we thought-”

“No worries,” you cut Fred off before he could finish with the explanation. You didn’t like the way he sounded. It almost made you feel like you were a party pooper. 

“We can just eat the pie tomorrow!” You tried to put on a smile when you shoved the pie into the fridge.

“Brilliant! All sorted now! Y/N, come help! Dinner would be ready faster if we had three people cooking.”

“Yea,” Maureen chuckled, “Fred was just talking about the first time you two tried to cook together. It must be difficult having to cook with an absolute idiot, let alone being forced to live with him for one year.”

Your heart sank. Fred told her that the marriage is fake? According to your contract, he shouldn’t have told anyone, unless...

Watching Maureen cooking and laughing with Fred, your mind just couldn’t shake off the images of her living here and being his real wife. You had to admit that you didn’t like these images, but why should you care if someone else is going to live here instead of you. Your mum forced you to live here anyway, and now you could finally go home.

Home. You sighed as the image of home appeared in your mind. And you finally admitted that for the past few months, you also considered this apartment your home.

But you put on the contract yourself stating that you both could date whoever you like during this fake marriage, and you had no business in interfering with Fred and Maureen’s relationship now.

So you picked up your jacket again, “Actually, I’m having dinner with my friend tonight-”

“But I thought you were planning to eat at home,” Fred pointed at the fridge, referring to the pie.

“Oh, that’s for tomorrow,” you lied, even though you knew your excuses didn’t match with what you just said a few minutes ago. You panicked, so you proceeded to say something that you never thought you would say, “Plus, I need to give you two space.” You even said it with a wink, covering for the fact that you panicked, and you just rushed out the door before anyone could say anything. 

~

You went back to your parents’ house for the night and only returned to the apartment the next morning. Knowing the exact time when Fred would usually go downstairs to the joke shop, you successfully apparated into the apartment without bumping into anyone. You just wanted to avoid seeing him.

You decided to start packing up. There are only less than two weeks left, and you didn’t want to occupy other people’s home for longer than you needed. Your pride demanded a graceful exit.

You knew it would be much easier and quicker if you used magic. Just by a flick of your wand, everything would be packed. It would be so clean like you’ve never been here before, but somehow, you just wanted to take your time with it.

And it was until you started packing when you realized how attached you were to this little apartment. One year wasn’t that long, just like what you said at the beginning of all this, but every corner of this apartment had trails of you living here and your memories.

It was just a contract, you tried to convince yourself, and now the time’s up. But it still pained you to remove your every trail. You realized you were not only removing your existence from this apartment but also Fred Weasley’s life. 

“Y/N?” You were so busy going down memory lane that you didn’t notice the series of footsteps coming upstairs. You turned and saw Fred, who looked very confused now as he glanced around and saw the packed boxes. “What are you doing?”

“Just packing up,” you tried to say it as indifferently as possible, “there are only two weeks left, so I thought I should probably start moving my stuff away.”

“Oh,” Fred paused for a moment before the corners of his mouth twitched into an awkward smile, “guess you’re finally free.”

“Yea, and so are you,” you tried to force a laugh, maybe he’s always waiting for this moment, the moment that he’s finally free, “I’ll move back to my parents’ house this week so that the divorce would look more realistic.”

His mouth opened, and you could tell that he was trying to say something. And for a second, you thought maybe he’s trying to think of a way to stop you. To say that he didn’t want you to leave.

But all he said was, “Okay.”

~

It was only around 6:30 am when you woke up. There were too many things on your mind that you couldn’t even enjoy staying asleep at ease. It was your last night here, after all.

Fred was still asleep with both his arm and leg on top of you. He’s an obnoxious sleeper, but you didn’t mind. 

You snuggled closer to him as your mind went through the nights that he comforted you when you couldn’t sleep, the sleepless nights that you would chat and laugh with so much ease, and the mornings when you woke with your limbs tangled together. It all felt like a dream, and maybe now it’s time to wake up. 

But before you do that, before you had to exit from his life, you just wanted to stay in this moment and stay in his arms for a little longer. You closed your eyes as you took in that familiar cinnamon scent and his cologne. Let’s just dream for a little longer.

~

Fred woke up with the other side of the bed empty. In a haze of sleepiness, he thought you just went to the bathroom. You would always come back to bed and try to squeeze in a few minutes of sleep before finally getting up and getting ready. But you didn’t come back today.

In fact, the apartment was awfully quiet today. He couldn't hear your footsteps rushing in and out of the bedroom to get ready for work. And he didn't hear you yelling things like "Did you see my keys?" or "FRED! Where did my apple juice go??"

Fred got up and tried to search for you in the living room, only to realize that most of your stuff was already gone. He collapsed on the nearby couch, not sure if he was still tired or feeling empty that you were gone.

How could you just walk away so easily? How could you just pull away from all of this almost like nothing ever happened? More importantly, how could you tease him about Maureen like it didn’t matter at all to you? And here he thought you two had great chemistry.

But without that and the contract of being fake husband and wife, Fred was confident that he could say you became friends. Even if you didn’t, at least you were roommates for a year, and that should induce some sort of emotion too.

But no, you just walked away, and all he could do was just getting used to not having you in his life anymore.

(to be continued.)

~

series taglist: @ifilosemyselfagain @theweasleytwinsgirl @bookworm06 @unabashedbookscollector @txtdreamss @sagittarius-flowerchild  @rsheridan @ovrwd @anywherebuthere @allaroundaddict @jeminila @secretsofageek @magical-spit @freddieweasleyswife @lilypad-55449 @hufflepuffzutara @honey-honey-5644 @kyloren-peterparker @treblebeth @kyloren-peterparker @fred-sux @rodrickmalfoy @liliputbahn @its-yasbxtch @daydreamgirl8​ @305weasley​ @awritingtree​  (message me if you want to be added or removed!)

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[im-immortal]

I've been thinking about Normily lately. What will things be like when Emily returns? And when Norman said he's like a monkey on the podcast, was he referring to the song "the monkey and the turtle" (like "I know this song is about me") or was it a sign about Bethyl? I know he's in a serious relationship right now but I would be happy if he still cares for Emily and maybe even misses her.

I am right there with you. I think I had another anon a few months back asking how I thought Emily's return might affect NR and his current relationship, and how her and NR's friendship might change. And honestly, I can't even attempt to theorize. They seem to be pretty casual friends at this point (I think I heard she unfollowed him again recently?? I haven't checked tbh) so I honestly think they could be professional enough to work together again. I think they've gotten over the past and moved on and found a comfortable place for their friendship. Plus Emily is in what appears to be a serious relationship right now, as well, and I really really don't think she's the type to be unfaithful or even slightly sketchy, no matter how much of a past she has with someone else. (doesn't mean the normily trash part of me can't hope that EK and NR get thrown together and are unable to deny the killer chemistry between them...)

As for the turtle comment whenever she had him on her podcast--I totally thought the same thing!! I honestly think that was a hint that he very much knew the song was about him. Maybe she even admitted to him at one point that it was. The convo they had also heavily hinted at the song being about him (how she talked about how they were so different when it came to creating art). I'd like to think it might've been a hint at Bethyl as well, since we all know the infamous turtle shell love note he gave to her on set after they filmed Still. It all just seems like way too much of a coincidence to not mean something more.

I'm right there with you, though. I don't wish for either of their relationships to fail, but I do sincerely hope they still care for each other and miss one another, and if they get the chance to work together again (ideally as Beth and Daryl, but I feel like that's empty hoping at this point ugh) then I truly hope they could set whatever differences aside and make it work, at least for the sake of our unlikely and doomed ship.

Hope I wasn't too much of a bummer with this answer lol I just miss Beth a lot and hate getting my hopes up about her return when I think it's pretty clear it's not happening. At this point, I'm just crossing my fingers that maybe one day we can have something else where EK and NR work together and can showcase their wonderful chemistry. (and of course, at the end of the day, I'll always be normily trash!!)

Thanks for the ask!! <3