#i was out of town and then i just- forgot????? 😬😬 | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

the-kr8tor · 5 days ago

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Rosehips in a ⭐ bottle perhaps dearest potion maker?

Fae Hobie thinks he lost you in his own woods, but you just got hurt a bit by adventuring next to the sharp river rocks.

-🪦

(btw I know I did a few, I think? I can't remember but in no way shape or form do I want to stress you out with my requests xoxo, have fun writing)

Whoops I forgot this was supposed to be a hurt/comfort fic 😬 sorry, it's more fluff than hurt, I hope you still like it! ❤️

Pairing: Fae! Hobie Brown x fem! Reader

Word count: 1k

Tags: No use of Y/N, no specific physical description of the reader, cw injury, fae AU, established relationship.

Katy's one year celebration 🎉

Hobie was awoken by your lack of presence next to him. He springs awake on the bed of flowers, flowers that you love the most. Flowers that you've told him that remind you of him and his pretty golden eyes that shine in the night like fireflies fluttering around the tall grass.

He pats your side of the bed, feeling the cold emptiness on his palm. The vines weaved around his arms perks up, wrapping even more, rising up to his bicep as his worry grows. You're allowed to leave his abode, you are human after all. And everyone desires to leave, even him, if not for him bound to his abode, he'd leave with you in a heartbeat. Live in a cottage at the edge of town, quiet enough but not too far from civilization. Cook with you in a fire he tended to. Lay down on a bed of soft fabrics, laugh with you until sleep takes you. He's satisfied to just have the latter. He only hopes that you do too, if you so desire to leave for good, he'd let you, he'd kiss you goodbye and wish you well. His heart would ache, yes, but he'll be glad to know that you're happier in your own world.

Even so, you wouldn't leave without a word to him. You'd leave a note with your flowery words scribbled on it. His face contorts into a deep frown as he concentrates on where to find you within his realm. His hands and vines ebb and weave through the soil, sprawling and crawling in the grass, trying to find your bright soul amongst the greenery and his haze of worry.

When he spots your illuminating form, he sprints and doesn't waste time in running through every tree and obstacle in his way. Green whizzes past him in increased inhuman velocity, eyes honing in on you.

He skids to a stop a few steps ahead of you, eyes widening at the state he found you in right next to the river bank on the edge of his abode. Your ankle is twisted in an angle, the wicker basket fallen right next to your prone form.

You feel the air rushing in front of you, and the smell of fresh dandelions filter through the air. To no one's surprise, you look up to see Hobie in all his glory, expression etched in worry.

“Hi.” You wave weakly through the pain. Hands wet from the lapping water right next to you.

“‘Hi?’ that all you have to say for yourself, love?” He tilts his head, walking closer to you as he scans you for any hidden injuries. Thankfully, he finds none.

“I thought it would be nice to have a lie down for a bit, y’know?” You joke, trying to lighten the mood as you see the sky darkening and the breeze stop blowing. You know him well to know that he's incredibly worried. He settles next to your injured ankle, kneeling down to inspect the damage, all without leaving his concerned eyes on you. “I’m fine, really. Just a flesh wound, is all.”

“Really?” He tilts his head, sky turning back into a light blue hue, breeze kissing your cheeks as he softly smiles at you. “It won't hurt if I poke you?”

You purse your lips together, “...no.”

“Alright then.” His finger inches closer to the raised and inflamed joint, teasing you as waits for your reaction. “‘ere I go—”

“No!” You stop him with a hand around his index. Now face to face with an all powerful fae, you see him grin at you smugly. You don't fear him, not at all. Especially when you know that he's more human than anyone outside his abode. “I was gathering herbs for my headaches.” Pouting, lashes fluttering, you put on your best puppy dog eyes to tamp down the teasing you're sure you're about to get after he tends to you.

His brows pinch together, thumb reaching for your forehead to press gently, trying to soothe your headache. “It's still botherin’ you?”

“Yeah, it's because I do all the thinking around here.”

His billowing laugh makes you laugh as hard. You find that its infectious, and you're absolutely infected with it. “Still cheeky, hm?” Flicking your forehead, he stares at you with gentle endearment as you glare at him while holding your ‘wounded’ forehead. “I can always conjure herbs for you, love. You know that.”

“I know, I'm sorry.” You sigh, placing your head atop his shoulder while he conjures vines to grow under your foot. “I just wanted to explore, and surprise you with a few clovers for the dinner table. It always looks pretty in the vases.”

Hobie reaches for your cheeks, cradling your face in his gentle and warm hold. “‘m not stoppin’ you from explorin’. Just be careful next time, yeah?” He wiggles your head in his hold, squeezing your cheeks in his calloused fingers while smile softly at him. “You could've fallen and broken somethin' more important if you weren't careful.” As the vines grow and weave around your ankle, acting like a temporary splint, you giggle at the tickling sensation. He watches your reaction, eyes crinkling at the corners while his golden eyes grow brighter.

“Like my head because I do all the thinking?”

“Or I just don't want blood on my grass.” He jokes, hand sliding under your legs and back to carry you carefully.

“Hey!” You smack his chest playfully as he lifts you up. “For that comment, I can get back home by myself, thank you very much!”

“If I let you, you'll be home by tomorrow.” He nudges your crinkled nose until your laughter echoes around the glade. “‘sides, I've got a great view from ‘ere.”

Grabbing his chin, you move his head gingerly towards your own. “Eyes up here, Hobie.” Your breath fans over his waiting lips. He could only hum in reply, he did not want to waste time to etch your lips upon his own until you're breathless in his arms.

Before you know it, you're back home with him. Piles upon piles of clover flowers and herbs greet you, but you barely notice them when you've got the most handsome flower right in front of you.

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nattinatalia · 2 years ago

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Urban Wyatt x Reader : Instagram AU

Part of my Third Harlow Series 🫧

Liked by claybornharlow, urbanwyatt, cozane, neelamthadhani, nemoachida, and 7,976,355 others

yourusername Derby weekend is just getting started!!!! First stop, the 2023 Barnstable Brown Gala!!!!

View all 1,600 comments

neelamthadhani What??? You’re here????

taylorrooks My girl ⭐️ can’t wait to see you!!!

cozane Did you forget to tell us something?

yourusername What? 🤨

urbanwyatt I didn’t even know you were home?

yourusername SURPRISE???? 🤪🤪🤪

user Urb not knowing his girl is in town has me laughing.

urbanwyatt She plays too damn much 🙄

yourusername I thought you liked it when I played????

urbanwyatt You know damn well what I mean loser!!!! Get over here to our table before your brother grows grey hairs

yourusername LMAAOOOO

•

yourusername added to their story

•

urbanwyatt added to their story

•

Liked by urbanwyatt, cozane, jackharlow, claybornharlow, shloob, and 7,876,345 others

yourusername 🐎 DERBY TIME 🐎 Walked out with a grand so I win 💅🏼

View all 2,900 comments

neelamthadhani Buy me something

urbanwyatt My baby 🤪

urbanwyatt 📸 I took the fit pic

urbanwyatt Let’s go to the bathroom real quick???

jackharlow FUCK OFF

urbanwyatt I mean that’s what I want to do.

mamamaggie URBAN!!!!!

yourusername 💀

user She wore that? 😬

user She forgot the dress memo? The hat memo??? Please.

user That dress is definitely not Derby appropriate.

user How is she going to show up and let others eat her up. Isn’t she an influencer on fashion and makeup??? 💀

claybornharlow She’s allowed to dress as she likes! I don’t see y’all paying her bills so don’t start telling her what she has to wear.

user Jack pays them for her 🤭🤭

yourusername Everyone suddenly knows all about my life and if my brother pays my bills? 😭😭😭 this is something else and all over because of what I chose to wear 💀

urbanwyatt My baby looks so damn sexy that’s why everyone is hating!!!!!

•

Liked by yourusername, selenosunni, cozane, jackharlow, quiiso, shloob, and 6,987,345 others

urbanwyatt inthaspot 💵 🐜 💵 🐜

View all 1,200 comments

yourusername my favorite picnic table to lay on 🤭🤪🤪🤪🤪

urbanwyatt 😞 STOP CALLING ME A PICNIC BLANKET!!!!

neelamthadhani 💀💀💀💀

yourusername Second pic- My two favorite chairs 🤪

selenosunni Wait what??

claybornharlow Y/N, act right!

urbanwyatt I know I’m your favorite chair… but Sunni???? Since uh when?

jackharlow Am I missing something? Please no, one best friend is enough.

yourusername 👀 🤭🤭🤭🤭

claybornharlow MOM COME HANDLE YOUR DAUGHTER!!!!

jackharlow Knowing her, she’ll welcome it! 🤦🏼‍♂️

mamamaggie She did have a crush on him and Copelan when she was younger.

urbanwyatt EXCUSE ME?

jackharlow NO

claybornharlow NO, IMMEDIATELY NO

cozane Ohhh???? Say more please

selenosunni cozane are you crazy? ABORT!!!

urbanwyatt If after this week you don’t hear from Y/N, it’s because she’s chained to the bed 🙄 talking about she used to like two of my best friends.

yourusername LMAAOO who said anything about USED TO????

jackharlow Blocked bye.

claybornharlow You’re annoying!!! Cope and Sunni y’all better stay away. I have enough of her and Urban!

selenosunni 🫡🫡🫡 Understood.

yourusername Such a fucking liar 🤥

cozane 🤪🤪🤪🤪

urbanwyatt 👀 You three better the fuck not!

yourusername 😊😊😊😊

urbanwyatt YN HARLOW!!!!!

jackharlow Gagging 🤢

yourusername It’s what I did on both of them last night! 🤤 😋

claybornharlow OUTTA POCKET!!!

urbanwyatt Stop playing.

yourusername Who’s playing? I’m not playing right now… The playing happened last night 🤪

cozane WAIT SHE’S LYING!!!!

selenosunni I DON’T LIKE THIS GAME ANYMORE !!!!

yourusername 🙄 YOU TWO COULDN’T HANG A BIT LONGER?????

cozane NOO I LOVE BEING ALIVE!!!!

selenosunni Did you not see the way your brothers and your man kept glaring at us????

urbanwyatt So this was all a prank? 😠

jackharlow 🤦🏼‍♂️

claybornharlow I hate you all.

urbanwyatt So having a crush on them was part of the prank too?

mamamaggie Oh no, that is definitely true!

yourusername MOM 😭

•

Liked by jackharlow, urbanwyatt, claybornharlow, mamamaggie, neelamthadhani, and 8,677,355 others

yourusername My big brother is the coolest and most loyal guy I know! Last night we celebrated him and celebrated his launch for his foundation. I know I’m always giving him headaches on here and in real life, and perhaps I don’t say it much, but I’m beyond proud of you J, you inspire me and everyone around you! Keep it coming because no one is doing it like you. OOKAAAY, BYE NOW!!!!! I’m on my way to make babies with your best friend 🤪🤪🤪🤪🤭🤭🤭

View all 1,800 comments

jackharlow Thank you baby sis, love you 💜

jackharlow You had me in the first half, not gonna lie!!!!

jackharlow Was the last part necessary?

neelamthadhani 💀💀💀 the last part bitch!!!

yourusername 🤪🤪🤪🤪

claybornharlow Never knows how to act right! Can’t give a compliment without acting a fool.

yourusername Your lives would’ve been boring without me.

jackharlow I guess thank you mom for picking her up from the dumpster!!!

yourusername YOU’RE ANNOYING!!!! I wasn’t picked up from a dumpster. Parking lot perhaps, but no dumpster.

urbanwyatt 😭 Always something with you.

mamamaggie Do you always have to terrorize your brothers? I’m here for it, but this was such a beautiful post and you add the last part. What am I gonna do with you my child?

claybornharlow FINALLY YOU CALL HER OUT

jackharlow Can you return her?

yourusername If anything she’d go back in time to swallow you both!!!! I’m her favorite, even with my terrorizing ways and all.

mamamaggie Y/N 🤫

claybornharlow Are you not going to correct her mother??

jackharlow At this point we both know she’ll always chose her!!!!

mamamaggie You’re getting it.

jackharlow Huh? What?

claybornharlow 🤦🏼‍♂️ she didn’t even hesitate

mamamaggie I WAS HACKED!!!!!!

•

TAG LIST

@heavyhitterheaux @harlowsbby @arination99 @cmalass @jackharloww @minkookie95 @deannaard @jacksmoviestar @harlowcomehome @fdl305 @httpkoylinnn @xoxokiaraaxoxo @hoodharlow @automaticpeachsong @amethyst09 @aliciacat20 @allyson15 @gabbylovesreading @stefansalvatoresgf @violetdreamsworld @carma-fanficaddict @jasminxts @itsaaliyah2 @itsyagirljaz @harrycanyonmoonn @neon-lights-and-glitter @awhore4moree

#urban wyatt #urban wyatt x y/n #urban wyatt x you #urban wyatt x yn #urban wyatt x reader #urban wyatt fic #jack harlow #harlow sister #instagram au

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daily-rikukingdomhearts · 1 month ago

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I AM SUPER SORRY FOR BOTHERING YOU im trying to get back into Kingdom hearts (your art is really cute btw) im trying to make an AU but i have no fucking idea where Kairi's body went when she lost her heart in KH1 when her heart's with Sora later Riku finds her body and he has it WHERE DID HER BODY GO? i saw a reddit post where somebody said Maleficent found her body and her body probably went to hollow bastion because that was radiant garden BUT HOW DID HER BODY GET THERE?? i forgot a lot of things maybe i can figure it out myself? but if you have an answer that would help me

I love asks ☝️🫵 you are not a bother! And thank you for the compliment. As customary, I have to post a Riku photo due to the nature of this blog:

As for your question:

I truly have no fucking clue 😬 I looked and looked and I couldn't find anything!!!! I looked in the manga, light novel, the wiki, and cross referenced with other kh experts but didn't come up with anything canon. Here's a BEST LOGICAL GUESS...:

Since Maleficent is collecting the princesses of heart she most definitely found Kairi

If it was in Hollow Bastion or Neverland, I don't know. Hollow Bastion used to be Radiant Garden and Kairi is from there so she probably ended up there like Riku did at the beginning of kh1 because, remember, Riku didn't end up in Traverse Town like Sora. The reason I'm thinking Neverland is so Maleficent can manipulate Riku. Again, she's gathering the princesses of heart, Riku wants his friends back together, he's been manipulated into thinking that Sora has replaced him, and he just had a major blow to the ego in Traverse Town. It's possible that Maleficent tells Riku that Kairi is in Neverland so he can play hero and save her, that way he can be more easily controlled. Those are two options.

It's just ... Hard to say. Because they don't really care about Kairi. The only people who care are Shiro Amano (the manga author) and half of the fandom. They really just halfheartedly throw her in the dumpster in every game which is a shame! She could be a great character.

As for how her body got there! I dunno! Kingdom Hearts is weird. Like here's a flow chart that my experts and I discussed:

Both Kairi and Sora are the only people who could keep living along side their nobodies. However when their nobodies "woke up" they were in completely different places than expected, Naminé being at Castle Oblivion and Roxas being in Twilight Town.

Personally! And just personally! I think it has something to do with your heart like how much dark and light it has in it, etc. Depending on that factor, that's where you get spit out. I could be 100% wrong though.

The nice part about AUs is that you can kinda do whatever the fuck you want... I have an AU where I kept the world system and keyblades and changed everything else cause no one can stop me. If you want Kairi in Hollow Bastion, slay! If you want her in Neverland, cool! If you want to ignore this post, even better! Do what you want! I hope you get back into kingdom hearts!

#kingdom hearts #kh #kh riku #kh kairi #kh analysis #i guess?#my kh experts are my older bother and my roommate #kh1 riku you are a petty little shit and i love you

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darkfictionjude · 3 months ago

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Heyy <3

I finally got home and read a couple of theories. I was interested in the theory about who or what could be killing people in WWC. I have my own little theory!

I'm more inclined to believe that it's a supernatural being that kills people. But that doesn't change the fact that it could also be a person (we all know what kind of brutal murders people can commit).But now about the supernatural. The movie "It" came to my mind, where the clown returns to the town after a certain amount of time and kidnaps children. Maybe it's the same here? I'm also somehow sure that all the victims have one thing in common. Maybe they saw something they shouldn't have? Or did something they shouldn't have? Is it possible that a supernatural being is actually taking revenge? I still can't get over the strange scene from the morgue, maybe this is the creature we are looking for? Then how can it know us? Ahh, all this time I always wanted my MC to finally tell others about this. Yeah, coming from MC it might be considered stupid or something like that, but it's worth a try

Theory about a human. It's hard for me to imagine that the same person commits crimes, because so much time has passed and the person must even grow old. And I still don't understand the motives of these killer. The victims weren't killed randomly. There is nothing that indicates to me yet that there could be more people here

I giggle every time I read theories like an evil devil on someone’s shoulder hehehe I think the answer is right there but obviously I would think that because I know already 😭😭

As for Crowny, you know them and withholding info, they either forgot willfully or just because their memory pushes things out involuntarily. There’s also the stigma of insanity, they’re story is already doubtful before they finish it so that’s another con they see 😬

I like how you think there’s a commonality within the victims, at least the girls. There was once a certain order here before Sammy for more than a century it seems 🤔

#theories #WWC

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laceyamethyst · 1 year ago

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HELLO i am crash-landing in your inbox to declare that have ✨ BIG FEELINGS ✨ about the 2nd chapter of “he built a fire” and that i might leave an uber long comment on ao3 about all the big and small bits i absolutely loved if that’s ok, but if you’d rather i sent them here please let me know!! i stayed up last night to read it instead of going to bed early for work (and read it again anyway over breakfast, i am late, whoops 😬)

i just wanted to share/ask before i forgot

- i was kinda bummed you unalived i mean fired Brian off camera so easily, i wanted him to try reprimanding Oscar for his hilarious, politely sassy - but very public - comments during the Qatar GP and for Lando to come swooping to his defence 🫣 idea? maybe a leftover Brian Lackey? we all know Lando would throw hands the first chance he gets to defend Oscar

- also, imagine the Mexican GP in this universe - more importantly, the 5 F2 rookies driving in FP1 and your lore about how F2 drivers all look up to Oscar? Fred would be normal about it but imagine just 4 wide-eyed eager puppies following Oscar around and Lando just going full caveman banging pots and pans hollering in the town square declaring “THAT ONE MINE NO TOUCHY” in the background while Oscar’s just ☺️ ‘it’s really great to have them here’

- i was done with those two points but then i remembered Oscar inviting Lewis to an RC-car race after his win in Suzuka and I just 🤯 ??? Lewis IRL is so hugely supportive of the LGBTQI+, I just can’t help imagine how he’d fit in the Mission universe (accidental reluctant relationship guru? ‘don’t make the same mistakes i did?’)

thank you for your consideration i will now go back to floating on cloud nine after chapter two 💗 have a spectacular week, you deserve it after making mine so awesome ❤️

oh my goodness, this was just... the nicest most wholesome wonderful thing to wake up to?!? thank you SO much, you have no idea how happy it makes me that you enjoyed the fic 🥺

firstly, i would absolutely love to hear any and all thoughts you have about that chapter because it fills me with so much joy to see which parts of my fics readers like most (and it also helps me decide what plot points to focus on next)! so please feel free to comment away on here or on ao3, and never ever worry about it being too long

and secondly, serious question: are you in my brain?! because, listen:

let me tell you how i had a whole dramatic ass scene planned involving a very public takedown of brian courtesy of one (1) lando norris, but i had to cut it out bc the chapter length was getting out of hand 😭. i adore your idea of oscar's qatar comments getting him in trouble and lando jumping to his defense (on live TV, perhaps? ahem)

oh please the rookies hero-worshipping oscar at the mexican gp and lando having absolutely None of it? that image is sending me

ok yeah you absolutely are in my brain because how did you know i had a whole scene planned where lewis talked to oscar after the race (bc he of course crashed into him in monza), firstly to apologize but when he realizes osc and lando just fought he was going to be all 'don't you dare let racing tear you apart you will regret it forever *cough* i still love nico *cough*.' but yes i love lewis and im trying to work him into a future mission fic!

i'm sorry for this very long and unhinged response, i'm truly vibing with these ideas and am super appreciative of you taking the time to share them with me 🧡

#this was truly the sweetest thing to wake up to #thank you sm lovely 🧡

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x3aspiration · 3 months ago

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hazeldine bacc 4-1 hazeldine

last / last of this household

hii im back i was gonna post this part like tmr or something but my game crashed twice while i was deleting cc so nvm on that !

i was so confused by this LOL i (thought i) told him to go to their store and after that he turns to me and makes that face ?? and then the option to go anywhere disappeared and i was like ??? turns out i told someone else to leave so i have no idea why he made that face lol , i thought he was just mad about leaving and refusing to go LMFAO

another one of romeo's victims 😔😔

also random side note bc this screenshot is in my pics folder, does anyone know whats wrong with my neighborhood screen lol

baby amelia's birthday :DD

the twins are now adults !! they didnt get a party unfortunately bc wilma was at the shop with jason all day bc i forgot it was their bday 😬

and henrietta got abducted !!!! literally only after like less than an hour of stargazing like wtf

i have a mod so women can get pregnant by abductions (sometimes) and very luckily she did not

one last big family breakfast before jack moves out!!

it's also henrietta's and jason's birthday!!!!

after all this time our founder is finally an elder :')

jason aged up too i guess LOLL into not my fav outfit tbh

and jack's heading off !! im so glad some of the kids are finally becoming adults, the town is abt to start moving QUICK

jason after his entire life finally maxed the creativity skill 🥳

WILMA FINALLY GOT STRUCK BY LIGHTNING !!!!!!!

....WHICH MEANS WE HAVE ELECTRICITY NOW 🥳🥳🥳🥳🥳 which also means we can finally start working towards other stuff like phones and cars :D

and just for good measure she got struck one more time!!! been trying for ages but it happens twice in one day, crazy

the city is moving along so nicely !! jack left on thursday meaning he still has some time in his rotation so that will be finished here !

next / next of this household

#the sims 2 #ts2 simblr #sims 2 #sims 2 gameplay #sims 2 screenshots #sims 2 bacc #ts2

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claudiajcregg · 9 months ago

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🕊🐤&🦩?

🥰🥰🥰🥰

Thank you for asking, friend! I'm sorry it took me about a week to actually answer. I forgot about it, then was too anxious about things to do it, and now I'm in the dumps. So going through my writing and trying to pick things, when I'm famously critical of it on a day I don't need that… was fun.

wip game of birds here

(this got long, so I'm putting it under a cut 😬 )

🕊️ a sweet quote (something sweet, fluffy! maybe it's cute or funny banter! or sappy wedding vows!)

Oh boy, I have a bunch of those, but I couldn't pick one. So I went with one in most need of editing. (This one was posted on tumblr over a year ago, IIRC.)

She gladly settled her head on his chest as Danny wrapped both arms around her, hugging her close. For so long, she had been chasing this kind of exquisite peace that being with him brought her. Perhaps she hadn’t really known what it truly felt like then, but she couldn’t imagine not having it there now. The sun would soon bathe the entire room in gold and barge in into their sleepy bliss. But until then, she was more than happy to lay in his arms and thank her lucky stars she had chosen to jump with him into the unknown. It might have been scary at first, but she knew she had made the right choice for herself after so many years of putting others first. And she wasn’t going to let it go.

🐤 a mystery quote (take out the context, even censor the names if you want! let 'em guess!)

His heart was in the right place, even if she didn’t fully agree with it, and he was a smart guy who needed to be more careful. There were plenty of reporters out there who would be tipped off, or worse, somehow stumble upon this scandal waiting to break. It was unfair that, in the wrong hands, this news could tarnish a much-needed good news day. If there was anything this town of vultures loved, it was a fall from grace they could feast on.

🦩dealer's choice (choose any quote at all! or the summary / ao3 tags thing! whatever! wild card!)

This is not the best thing, but I was looking for other quotes (there was a good fluffy candidate before this), but this made me laugh.

“Daniel James Concannon…” “C.J., you know perfectly well my middle name is Patrick.” “I know that,” she confirmed, “Daniel Patrick. Very Irish combination. Fits you.” “My knee’s starting to hurt,” he whined humorously. “Is this the time to tease me about my name?”

The WIPs these came from are: a Jan 22 ficlet inspired by a dino comic, the "5 to 6 am me time" I want to edit and add more to soon, and a silly fail of a proposal that I don't think would've happened, but the idea amused me. (I also considered bits from the Haunted by the notion sequel, but the ficlet is just tooth-rooting fluff.)

Thank you again! 💕

#unseenacademic #asks #wip game of birds #fanfiction

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polyamorouspunk · 1 year ago

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So I had a kinda weird week

My parents decided to do a vacation week in my college town while I had lectures and it’s been kinda… uuuuh

I also had migraine two days this week (one actually today, it always gets better after sleep, food and some hefty ibuprofen) and my knees decided to act up

Consequently I actually used my walking cane on campus yesterday after lectures and today in front of people who know me 🫣 [emoji hiding behind hands]

Like, I got my cane early this year and since the semester break I started to actually carry it in my backpack everyday (I don’t need the space for my laptop this semester) but I’m still anxious and shy about using my cane on campus

I used to for my weekly shopping trips. Actually, I even made a surprised pikachu on the topic because “if I’m carrying my cane around anyway, I might as well use it even if my knees aren’t “that bad” because I don’t need to be in pain to use my mobility aid” was such a galaxy brain moment for me!

But it’s different to use my mobility aid in front of people who know me and I’m still worried someone will confront me and ask questions and then I’ll get called a faker because no doctor ever actually told me to get a mobility aid (I live in a country with mandatory health insurance and should actually go to the doctors about getting checked until they find what the fresh hell is up with my joints)

But, uuuuhh, you wanted a story of the day and here’s some anxiety vent 😬 [grimace emoji]

Oof yeah using mobility aid scary.

I live in America so it gets kind of frustrating when I say like “my job took the stools away because we ‘sit too much’ and now I have to stand to use the computer desk and it sucks as someone with a chronic pain condition” to have people out of the US be like ISNT THAT ILLEGAL or something because it’s like no actually most jobs force you to stand for hours on end, meanwhile other people are like “can’t you just get a doctor’s note that says you need to sit because you have chronic pain issues” and to be like “that’s such a slippery slope what if they start denying me hours or something” which considering my old manger also had chronic pain issues and worked full time so maybe not but I feel like people outside of the US don’t realize how fucked you can be playing games with being disabled in the US.

Being called a faker if I ever used a mobility aid would be the least of my concerns, I would be worried it would hurt my chances of getting jobs, hours, housing by myself, etc.

I DO wish that when I was having a bad day a cane would help but unfortunately both of my legs hurt equally so I would need something like a rollator or a wheelchair. My best friend offered to mail me a rollator (bless her) but I said no I didn’t want her to have to go through the hassle.

I’m lucky that I’m on meds that negate my chronic pain but I forgot to take them last night and I woke up in debilitating pain.

The idea of having a cool looking mobility aid is fun though! But hell yeah doesn’t hurt to carry it around with you. Beat the shit out of people with it. Defense weapon if needed.

Oof about your parents vacationing in your college town.

I’m sorry about your migraines, I hope that they go away soon.

#punk gets mail

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jaigny · 2 years ago

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Jase Moonwood

That's right, Moonwwod. His ancestors named this small logging rundown town due to how the local mountain lake was shaped like a crescent and also apparently due to old mythical supernatural claims that were spotted from time to time and thrived in its early years. Now it's just home to a few residents and local staff at the Moonwood Timber and Logging Mill.

Age: YA (roughly 26)

Sexual Orientation : Allosexual

Pronouns: He/They

Career: Woodwork/Logger

Traits: Domestic,Loyal,Bro and Socially Awkward

Jase (Short for Jason) isn't your average local boy, he's a logger at his family's local business and also on the side does wood working sculptures. He also has vitiligo though people and doctors misdiagnosed it as some kind of rosecea.(It’s more noticeable in CAS on the face and l think the body but l forgot to check 😬)

His Mother passed when she was young from being bitten by some creature (vampire) and sadly died one evening. His father disappeared and has though police and Granite Fall Rangers from local neighboring towns Cooperdale and Granite Falls said their have been sightings of both but always lead to a dead end. (Unbeknownst to Jase his parents are both well, his mother was actually turned and lives with Vlad's court in Forgotton Hollow, his father is also fine and is actually the feral werewolf named Greg and lives mostly with his wife in Vlad's Castle/Manor.)

Jase also has an affinity for being a medium, as when he was young a few years after his parents disappeared/died and had dreams he couldn't really make out like details like faces but he does remember that apparently he's supposed to meet a green and black haired woman but he returns to consciousness when the figure ( who is actually Monami Moon) turns and fades out.

Jase also grew up with his grandparents until they both passed at the age of 18 and soon he was living on his own, spending time with his few small circle of friends, helping police every now and then when their was a sighting of his parents and delving into his musical and gardening talents. His Grandmother taught him the pipe organ as well as knitting and embroidery while his mother taught him the violin, piano and painting his dad the guitar and handiness.. And he is also gifted naturally with a nice sooth singing voice and has gained the rest of his skills due to alot of handwork and effort.

But something this time felt different to Jase like it was some kind of lure that the universe was trying to send him a signal when a loose flyer smacked the poor kid in the face during a logging tree run which in itself was dangerous not just to the autumn winds but visual impaired. Thankfully though he was fine and grumbled bout litterbugs etc and shoved it into his pocket later to deal with during lunch break.

And as he scoffed his sandwich past his lips looking like a chipmunk, nearly choked at the surprising image of a green and black haired woman on the frayed flyer and after reading it, applied because for him, he might figure out what his vision ment and why he was seeing this stranger and after a few weeks packed up his bags for a long hauled flight to wherever this beautiful green and black haired creature resided.

*Files*

P.S I did try to give him a casual dark aesthetic/desaturated closet variety but your welcome to change it if need be. @honeysulani but l hope you like him!

#the sims 4 #Jase Moonwood #monamissoulmate

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just-some-random-blogger · 1 year ago

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Wow. What can I say but wow (Owen Wilson voice) but also wow (solemnly)

How do I even begin to process this? How do I even ????????

[future me edit: this is really fucking long 💀💀💀🤣🤣 I JUST HAVE A LOT TO SAY OK]

First of all this makes me want to write a Joel angst too. Like 100000 of them cos this is so

As you sat there in the dimly lit living room, the weight of Joel's words hung heavily in the air.

This was so beautifully written. Also I love it when you use inner turmoil. I keep saying imma steal that but I keep forgetting HAHAAHAHHAHA

Joel stared at the floor, avoiding your gaze. "I love you. So much. More than I ever thought I could love someone. But, I can't keep pretending that I can give you everything you deserve. I'm 35, and I've lived a life that's... complicated. I don't want to tie you down, especially when you have so much of the world left to explore."

🤨✋ PAUSE. PAUZEEE MADAME. leave him. leave his ass.

First of all, if you're with someone who thinks they're going to hold you back LEAVE THEM COS THEY WILL THEYRE TELLING ON THEMSELVES.

Second of all, not him acting like 35 is old dafaq??? WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU LIVED A LIFE??? GIRL LIFE STARTS AT 30 COS THATS WHEN YOU GET UR SHIT TOGETHER HELLO?????

ALSO SHES 25????????????????????????? WHAT IS SHE DOING THAT YOU CAN NO LONGER DO??? CLIMB UP THE FUCKING STAIRS? HELLO???? EARTH TO JOEL???? ITS GIVING SELF-RIGHTEOUS PRICK, ITS GIVING SAVIOR COMPLEX?????

👩‍⚖️LEAVE HIS ASS.👩‍⚖️ NEXT 🥱

"I don't want you to look back one day and regret being with me," he continued, his voice gentle as he clasps both of your hands in his. "I couldn’t live with myself if one day you look at me and all I’d see is regret in your eyes. I want you to experience the world, to find your own path. I know you'll go on to do amazing things, and I don't want to be the reason you didn't." His eyes glimmered with tears.

He thinks he's musty and dusty and not worth staying for. Leave his bum ass rat face ass ROIGHT NIOW 🤮🤮🤮

AND ANOTHER THING THE FACT HE CANT IMAGINE SEEING THE WORLD WITH YOU ✋✋✋✋✋��😒😒😒😒😒

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🗣️THATS🗣️SO🗣️ FUCKING🗣️TELLING🗣️🗣️OF🗣️HIMMMM🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️MISS ME WITH THAT BULLSHIT FUCK OFF

“And what about what I want?” You stared back at him, defiant. “What if I want to be here with you?”

EXACTLY. SPEAK YOUR TRUTH QUEEN. IT TAKES TWO TO TANGO. UNFORTUNATELY UR MANS BARELY GOT TWO BRAIN CELLS BUT OKAY GO OFF I GUESS

He smiled softly and shook his head. “You know, I could be selfish and keep you here with me. But what can you achieve in this town, really? You had such big dreams when we met, remember? Don’t think I forgot.”

🧍‍♀️ aur. .......... 😗😗😗👁️👄👁️ and I oop. 😬😬😬 That's what he meant....

She has dreams and ambitions....... Aurr......... Aurr ......... See okay now Joel's got a point........... Aur.... See see ☝️

“Dreams change.” was all you managed to get out before your throat started to tighten and you felt the prickling of tears in your eyes.

SPEAK YOUR TRUTH KWEENNNNNNNNNNNN. But yah I get where Joel's coming from. Ya really can't tell cos you'll be riddled with what ifssss 😔 but what about love ?? Is that really not a what if you're willing to take?

Ok. Joel NTA (not the asshole in case you didn't know HAHAHHAAHH)

Joel pulled you in for a hug and buried his face in your shoulder. “Don’t change them for me. Never for me.”

😗😬 AUR. CUZ. CUZ. ☝️ HES GOT A POINT. CAPN SHE THREW A CURVE BALL AT US WE CURRENTLY DONT KNOW WHERE THIS IS GOING NOR HOW WE FEEL.

But we love it here

Deep down, you knew you had to go. Not because you wanted to, but because you knew Joel would never forgive himself if you didn’t. It was ironic and so painfully stupid that it hurt - he thought this breakup would help you and you went through with it to help him.

I COULDN'T FIND IT BUT THERE IS THIS VIDEO OF A KPOP BOY COUGHING UNCONTROLLABLY AND ONE OF HIS GROUP MATES TURNED TO HIM AND STARTED WAVING AND SAID BYE that's how I feel HAHAHAH

So there you went. You packed your bags and you were out of there in less than a week. You moved in with a friend in New York for a couple of months until you secured a stable job and an apartment. You followed Joel's advice, exploring the world, pursuing your dreams, and building a life that was uniquely your own. You missed him more than you cared to admit, but you knew that his intentions had been pure, and in a way, it did benefit you.

🗣️AS🗣️YOU🗣️SHOULD🗣️QUEEN🗣️GETIM🗣️ but also pure intentions is a stretch. Like he did this so that he wouldn't feel guilty in the future too so he's overcompensating for something that hasn't happened yet which also might not even happen. Well/good intentions tho, sure. Ig.

No cuz fuck that shit. That's fucked up. That's cold. That's low.

Fuck this. You double tap the picture, giving it a “like”. This will give them something to talk about, you think spitefully. He wanted me to move on with my life? Well this is me, moved on. As you throw your phone to the other side of the bed, the pain finally sinks in and you cry into your pillow, wondering if you truly, will ever move on.

🗣️AS🗣️SHE🗣️FATHER🗣️FUCKING🗣️SHOULD🗣️RAT🗣️ASS🗣️CRETIN🗣️GOOD🗣️FOR🗣️NOTHING🗣️MAN🗣️

People would kill for the life you have and you will NOT be ungrateful about it.

😔😔😔😔😔 aw. Awie. ouch. 😃😃😃 DAMN BRUH CUZ NEEDING TO BE GRATEFUL IN A SITUATION SOMETIMES SUCKS ASS YOU SHOULD BUT ALSO FUCK IM MISERABLE OVA ERE LEMME LIVE

He whispers your name, almost in disbelief as his brows furrow. “Hey. Wow.”

HAHAH WAIT I DIDNT REALIZE THIS GIRL SAID OH WOW WHAT A FITTING MEME. NO CUZ I WANT TO BE THAT EX. MAKE YOU GO HEY. WOW. COS 💅💅💅💅💅💅💅💅💅💅💅💅💅

AS YOU SHOULD SHE IS DATTTT GWWWWOOORRLLLLLLLLLLLLL SLAAYYYYYYYYY NUFFIN ELSE TO SAY BUT HEY WOW 😩😩😩😩😩 GOT THE WHOLE GROUP CHAT GAGGGEDDDD

He’s older, grayer, but damn him, he still looks so fucking good.

HAHAHHAAH NOT CUZ I ZONED OUT AND THOUGHT IT SAID GAYER AND I WAS LIKE OOP SLAY A GAY CHARACTER ENTRANCE BUT THEN I WAS LIKE HUH??? WHY IS THERE A GAY FRIEND??? then I saw it was gray 💀💀💀 HAHAHHAAH

You stand there staring for a moment, while he examines the box of Cap’n Crunch.

Canon Pedro character lore, liking capn crunch. That's his fav right???? LMAOO AHAHAH

Somehow this exchange cuts you deeper than the day he broke up with you. When did you become people who could barely speak 3 words to each other?

😩😩😩😬😬😬😬😬🫣🫣🫣 I CAN SEE IT NOW HER VILLAIN ORIGIN STORY. WOOF

At that, he visibly stiffens and clears his throat as he replies, “Oh, Cassie and I aren’t together anymore. Well we were never.. But we kind of.. Yeah she’s not in the picture. It’s just me and Sarah.”

😃😃✋✋✋✋✋✋🤪🤪🤪🤪🫨🫨🫨😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵😵😨😨😨😰😰😰🙀🙀🙀 LISTEN I COULD PUT A MEME BUT IM ON MOBILE AND I CAN ONLY PUT 10 PICS IM TRYNA CONSERVE THEM BUT LIKE NDJSJDJSJJS BROOOOOOOOOOO SHE LEFT YOU YOUR FOOKIN REBOUND LEFT YOU AND LEFT YOU A BABY 💀💀💀💀🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣🫣 THATS SO EMBARRASSING FOR YOUR SOUL AND ?????? SO FUCKED UP FOR YOU AND FOR HEE OBVI BUT FOR YOU TOO BRO CUZ IMAGINE NOT EVEN LOVING THAT WOMAN AND HAVING HER GENETIC DNA LIFE WITH YOURS IN A HUMAN AND YOULL HAVE THAT HUMAN WITH YOU FOREVER or I mean till she gets shot 😶 sorry ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

“No, wait. Can we talk, please? I.. I’ve missed you. I want to talk.” Joel steps towards you as if to stop you from leaving but then holds himself back.

[RUNNING AWAY SCREAMING AND CRYING]

“I don’t think we have anything much to say to each other anymore, Joel, don’t you think?” You chuckle a little to mask the overwhelming urge to cry.

AS SHE SHOULD SHE ATE SHE LEFT NO CRUMBS SHE SPOKE HER TRUTH SHE SPOKE OUR TRUTH THE GROUP CHAT IS WILD SHE LIKE ME FOR REAL TELL IM THEN CRYYYYY SLAYYY

“I just want to know how you’re doing.” He looks at the ground, like a puppy scolded by his owner and you know you can’t resist the floodgates that pour out. You take a deep breath and let it all out in one exhale.

NO CUZ ITS GIVING PATHETIC BUT ALSO I MEAN YEAH HE IS PATHETIC HE KNOWS HE IS I MEAN YEAH THEY BOTH KINDA ARE I MEAN YEAH LEAVE HIS ASSSS FUCKING LEAVVVEERE

“Fine. You want to know? I’m doing great, just as you said I would. I make a ridiculous amount of money every year, I have a fancy apartment that overlooks the city, I have nice friends and a good life. It’s everything you wanted for me.”

🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️ wow she went. off. [Huffs] [insert zuko meme]

“You deserve it. I knew you would.” He says, nodding with a sad smile.

🤨🤨🤨😃😃😃✋✋✋🤪🤪🙃🙃🙃 GO ON KING GIVE US NOTHING

He stands stunned for a moment, his eyes concerned and brows furrowed. He eventually steps fully in front of you this time. His hands hesitate, as if he doesn't know where to put them, until he settles for your shoulders. “I’m sorry. I thought.. I thought you would be–”

WAIT I DIDNT COPY THE PART WHERE SHE SAYS THEN WHY ARENT I HAPPY 🤪🤪🤪💀💀💀💀💀💀👁️👄👁️ nO CUZ WHAT IS THAT KEJEJEEJ THATS SO REAL OF HER NO CUZ BRO. [bIGGGGGG SIGHHHHHHHH]

[FUTURE ME EDIT I WENT BACK TO COPY IT COS-]

“So why don’t I feel happy yet?” You can’t believe it but you actually start to cry. Here in the middle of the damn cereal aisle in front of your ex-boyfriend.

I LITERALLY GASPED AT THIS AND SAID MAAM THIS IS A WALMART AND THEN RIGHT AFTER I READ THE PART WHERE YOU WROTE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DAMN CERAL AISLE HAHAHA NO CUZ SAME THOUGHTS FOR REAL GIRL 😭😭😭😭✋✋✋✋✋ THIS IS THE DOLLAR SHOPPPPPP 😩😩😩😩 SOS. HYPERMARKET WHO I ONLY KNOW HYPER-REACTIONS 💅🫦

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POOJA WHAT IS THISSSSSSS WHAT IS THIS BEHAVIOR WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU THOUGHT GAGO KA PALA MARAMING NAMAMATAY SA MALING INAKALA (SO YOURE [curse word GAGO] SO MANY PEOPLE DIE BECAUSE OF WRONG ... ASSUMPTIONS [??? YEAH IT THINK ITS ASSUMPTION ABHAHAHAH])

Ok that's a filo saying but tbh I don't even know anyone who died from wrong assumptions... At least personally jdjejejjejsj HAHAH

You bat his hands off your shoulders. “Yeah, you did. But it doesn’t matter because what’s done is done and we’ll never get it back. Any of it.”

SHES SUCH A QUEEN FOR SWATTING THAT PESKY LOUD ANNOYING ASSUMING ASSUMERA FLY SLAYYYY

He says your name, pleadingly.

TAKE MY FUCKING NAME OUCHO FUCKING MOUTH

“No, I don’t blame you. I left, didn't I? It was my decision too. I guess deep down some part of me thought I would be better off. And in a way I am. I really am. But I cannot lie to you and say that I’m happy Joel, because I’m not. And nothing will change that. Because this is my life now.”

🫨🫨🫨🫨🫨😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️ NO CUZ ITS THE IRREVERSIBLE DAMAGE FOR ME ✋✋✋✋✋ ITS THE THIS IS THE FUCKING WHAT IF YOULL FOREVER FUCKING THINK ABOUT. OOF. OOF. OOF.

A moment of silence passes between the two of you as the weight of the years of separation hangs there. “I’m not either,” he whispers.

😒😒😒🙄🙄🙄🤨🤨🤨🫤🫤🫤 I don't remember fucking asking tho

“I’m not.. happy. Cassie and I had a fling when I was heartbroken and dealing with our breakup. She had just gotten divorced and I was.. I was planning to ask for you back. I was prepared to get on a fucking airplane and beg on my knees until you took me back. Whether that meant moving you back home or me moving here, it didn’t matter to me. We’d make it work. I just wanted you to know that I made a mistake and I shouldn’t have decided for you.” He places his hands on your shoulders again, and you let them stay this time.

Why didn't you? 🤨 ??? 🧍‍♀️

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Translation of this: [but] why do you look like you're mad. Why is it like it's my fault

THATS LAST PART BAKIT PARANG KASALANAN KO???? HELLLO????

IF YOU WANTED TO YOU WOULD HAVE??? HELLO???? HELLOO BE SO FUCKING FOR REAL??? LIKE SO WHAT??? YOU DIDNT DO IT WHAT DO YOU EXPECT ME TO DO ABOUT IT??? DAFAQ

He continues, speaking quickly as if a dam has burst. “But then Cassie got pregnant. And I knew I had to make a choice. [...]

You did that. You chose to do that. You had a plane ticket but you chose to find solace in another person's arms to forget about them. You dug your own grave. Again it's like telling on you. I know people have moments of weaknesses and yada yada but like BIGGGGG SIGHHHH THATS WHAT YOU CHOSE TO DOOOOOOO❗❗❗❗❗❗❗

We said we’d try to raise the kid together and be a family but.. A few months after Sarah was born she just left. Literally, took off and left, and I have no idea where she went. Frankly, I don’t even care. And then I got so busy with the kid and then years passed, and I just lost the timing. What, am I just supposed to call you up 10 years after breaking up with you, telling you what a joke my life has become? How I’ve regretted every moment since you packed your bags?”

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You let all of his words sink in for a while before choking out, “And what do I do with all this information now? What do you expect me to do?”

👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑👑💅💅💅💅💅💅💅💅💅💅😩😩😩😩😩😩😩🫦🫦🫦🫦🫦🫦🫨🫨🫨🫨 CROWD LEFT SHOOQ QUEEN BEHAVIOR SHE 👏SPOKE👏HER👏TRUTTHHHH👏 AS SHE SHOULD QUEEN SHE LIKE ME FOR REALLLL LIKE GIRL???

You nod, your brain not fully able to come up with words at this point, so he continues. “If you’d told me you were happy, I would have swallowed my pride, wished you well, and walked out of this store with the knowledge that at least all this pain has finally brought you joy. But we’re both hurting now, so what does that make us?”

Tangang bobong inutil walang kwentang gagong ulol fucking shit rat dull headed stupid ass dipshit loser. Pathetic simply put. ////: tbh both of u I'm not sorry maybe for YN a bit

“Two idiots crying in the cereal aisle?” You offer with a small chuckle through your tears.

😬😬😬😬😬 ok yeah that works too ig. I liked mine better

He shakes his head before looking into your eyes. “You know what the sick part is? 10 years ago I told you I never wanted you to look at me with regret in your eyes. Yet here you are.”

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It only took him 10 years.

NO CUZ YEAH JOEL I WAS SCREAMING (silently) WHEN I WAS READING THIS GIRL GET A FUCKING GRIP

“Maybe.” He replies cheekily, smiling softly. With that, he pulls you in for a hug and the familiar waft of his cologne transports you back to 10 years ago when you hugged in his living room before saying goodbye, when you used to cuddle together so close at night, when he used to hug you before leaving for work. Your memories together flash before your eyes like a sick Hallmark movie except this time you know the ending.

NO CUZ THISSSSSSSSSSSSSS. THIS FUCKING HURT. SMELLS MAKE ME FEEL THINGS YOU KNOW 😩😩😩😩😵‍💫😭😭😭😭 GOSH

You feel the press of his lips against your head and you swear you hear him whisper the words “I love you” but you can’t be sure because your heart is pounding and you can feel it in your ears. Your life from this point on will always be divided into before and after. The point where you know, you just know, the choice you made is irreversible. You will never have Joel Miller ever again.

😃🙃🤪 fuck. I DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT ELSE TO SAY *INSERT ZUKO MEME*

WAIT I LOST ANOTHER PART AGAIN WHERE THEY WERE DIVERGING WITH THE SHOPPING CARTS KEJDJDJDJ I WAS THINKING IT WOULD HAVE BEEN ICIER IF WE STARTED IN THE SUPERMARKET AND WORKED OUT WAY BACK AND FUCKING WENT TO PRESENT AND JUST FUCJING

CUZ THATS WHAT ITS GIVING ITS GIVING VERY MUCH LAUNDRY AND TAXES 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Joel looks at his daughter and wonders what it would be like if this kid was yours, and you stare at your phone, a message from your new date asking you to confirm a meeting time flashing on your screen.

No cuz Joel's is kinda fucked up. I mean I know what he means but also that's like changing the kid altogether,like genetically so Sarah wouldn't be Sarah you know.... Ok ive overthunkthunk this thunking thing 💀💀💀

Do I even have to say I enjoyed this??? I enjoyed this. Pls keep posting and don't delete ur work just cuz ugly people have boyfriends and you dont 😔😔😔😔😩😩

I Hope You're Happy / Joel Miller x Reader

Description: Joel breaks up with you, thinking that he's setting you free to chase your dreams. And you do. And he gets another girl pregnant. And you meet each other in the cereal aisle of the grocery store. And you hope the other is happy. But you're not. You're both not.

Word count: 2.6k

A/N: Angst angst angst. No outbreak AU.

Deep down, you knew this day would come. What did you expect, dating someone 10 years older than you? You just didn’t think it would come this soon. Or that it would hurt this much.

As you sat there in the dimly lit living room, the weight of Joel's words hung heavily in the air. It had been a typical evening, sharing a meal and telling each other about your day, but something felt different tonight. The air seemed heavy with tension and Joel’s smiles didn’t really reach his eyes, betraying an inner turmoil that you hadn't seen before.

"Listen," he began, his voice tinged with regret, "I’ve been thinking a lot about something."

You felt a knot tightening in your stomach as you nodded, prompting him to continue.

You tried to understand his perspective. Tried to see where he was coming from but all you could think was, Why now? Why now when I’ve already fallen in love with you?

“And what about what I want?” You stared back at him, defiant. “What if I want to be here with you?”

He was right. You passed on a few big job opportunities in New York when you settled down with Joel, and you kept telling yourself you’d apply next week, which became next month, next year, until it never happened. Suddenly a fancy job and new apartment in the Big Apple didn’t seem appealing anymore. Not when you had Joel.

“Dreams change.” was all you managed to get out before your throat started to tighten and you felt the prickling of tears in your eyes.

Joel pulled you in for a hug and buried his face in your shoulder. “Don’t change them for me. Never for me.”

You have proper savings now, and you are a fully independent adult, carving your way painfully through a year of hard work, job searches, apartment hunting - all while navigating a broken heart. And while you love your new life, late at night in the dark of your fancy new apartment overlooking the city skyline, you often found yourself thinking, was it all worth it?

But you shake your head out of the daze eventually. Because if it isn’t worth it then all the pain and all the tears were for nothing. So you had to love this life. Forced yourself to love it because that’s what Joel wanted for you. Joel. Even now, you still live for Joel.

Until you didn’t. Your fingers freeze on your phone as you read the caption on Cassie’s new instagram post with a man who looks all too familiar.

Excited to welcome a new chapter into our lives. 👶❤️

Your stomach sinks. Your phone drops to the bed. And tears sting your eyes. No. It can’t be. You pick up the phone again and there he is. Your Joel, messy hair as if he just rolled out of bed and his scruffy beard. Smiling at Cassie who’s holding a picture of an ultrasound. CASSIE? And JOEL?

You try to think back to every interaction they had during the course of your relationship but it had never been more than polite small talk at neighbourhood gatherings or run-ins at the grocery store. Wasn’t she married? Fuck this. You double tap the picture, giving it a “like”. This will give them something to talk about, you think spitefully. He wanted me to move on with my life? Well this is me, moved on. As you throw your phone to the other side of the bed, the pain finally sinks in and you cry into your pillow, wondering if you truly, will ever move on.

In the years that pass, you try to distract yourself with work and your new friendships. On paper, your life in New York was going swimmingly well and you had even dated a couple of nice guys. Dating still gives you a little twinge in the heart but you ignore it for the most part. People would kill for the life you have and you will NOT be ungrateful about it.

But of course, life is never that simple. Just when you think you’re able to find happiness, you get thrown a curveball. And this curveball came in the form of Joel Miller, standing in the cereal aisle of your local grocery store. He’s older, grayer, but damn him, he still looks so fucking good. You stand there staring for a moment, while he examines the box of Cap’n Crunch. As he puts the box back down and glances up, he meets your eyes and you hate this cliche, but you swear to God, time stands still.

He whispers your name, almost in disbelief as his brows furrow. “Hey. Wow.”

“Hey.”

“You… How are you?”

“I’m good. Yourself?”

“Yeah great.”

Somehow this exchange cuts you deeper than the day he broke up with you. When did you become people who could barely speak 3 words to each other?

Trying to alleviate the clenching of your heart, you speak up. “What are you doing here? This is the last place I thought I’d ever run into you.”

He chuckles softly. “Yeah, I uh.. Tommy’s up here meeting a couple of friends and asked me to tag along. I’m sorry I didn’t reach out by the way, I should have texted when I knew we were heading –”

You cut him off, not wanting to hear lies. “No, that’s okay. I wouldn’t expect you to. You must be busy now anyways with the kid.”

His eyes soften at that, guilt and pain flashing through them but you push on. “It’s fine, really. You’re not obligated to tell me these things. I just saw on Cassie’s instagram. Is she here too?”

Sarah. He had a girl. A little girl. Your stomach twists and you kind of feel like throwing up so you try to find an exit. “Oh, I’m sorry to hear that. Well, Sarah is lucky to have you. I always knew you’d make a good dad.”

He smiles for the first time in this conversation. “Truthfully, I have no idea what I’m doing half the time but she’s a good kid.”

Enough. Enough. Enough. “Well, it was nice meeting you again Joel, and I’m glad you’re doing well–”

“No, wait. Can we talk, please? I.. I’ve missed you. I want to talk.” Joel steps towards you as if to stop you from leaving but then holds himself back.

“I don’t think we have anything much to say to each other anymore, Joel, don’t you think?” You chuckle a little to mask the overwhelming urge to cry.

“You deserve it. I knew you would.” He says, nodding with a sad smile.

“So why don’t I feel happy yet?” You can’t believe it but you actually start to cry. Here in the middle of the damn cereal aisle in front of your ex-boyfriend.

You bat his hands off your shoulders. “Yeah, you did. But it doesn’t matter because what’s done is done and we’ll never get it back. Any of it.”

He says your name, pleadingly.

A moment of silence passes between the two of you as the weight of the years of separation hangs there. “I’m not either,” he whispers.

“What?”

He continues, speaking quickly as if a dam has burst. “But then Cassie got pregnant. And I knew I had to make a choice. We said we’d try to raise the kid together and be a family but.. A few months after Sarah was born she just left. Literally, took off and left, and I have no idea where she went. Frankly, I don’t even care. And then I got so busy with the kid and then years passed, and I just lost the timing. What, am I just supposed to call you up 10 years after breaking up with you, telling you what a joke my life has become? How I’ve regretted every moment since you packed your bags?”

You let all of his words sink in for a while before choking out, “And what do I do with all this information now? What do you expect me to do?”

He’s tearing up and his voice rises a little as he replies, “Nothing. I don’t expect nothing. I just needed you to know that I never spent a day without thinking of you or loving you. And that I’m sorry. And that I wish you were happy, because if you were, then at least all of this bullshit would be worth it. But you’re not.”

“Two idiots crying in the cereal aisle?” You offer with a small chuckle through your tears.

He breathes out a small laugh. “Yeah. That it does.”

A woman passing through the aisle snaps you both back to reality as you wipe your tears and gather yourselves. “It is really good to see you, Joel. And.. thank you for telling me all of it. It doesn’t change anything but I think I needed to hear it.”

He shakes his head before looking into your eyes. “You know what the sick part is? 10 years ago I told you I never wanted you to look at me with regret in your eyes. Yet here you are.”

You nod and smile sadly. There’s nothing left to say.

His gaze turns soft. “I hope you’ll be happy someday. Maybe not now, but someday.”

“Maybe. And yourself?”

As you pull away, you both tearfully smile and look at each other for the last time. You spend a good minute just looking, memorizing the other’s face. You both don’t bother with the polite pleasantries of promising to keep in touch because you know that would be a lie. It would be too painful. This is your fate now.

You walk past each other, leaving your memories and feelings behind in the dust of your footprints. To passersby, you look like strangers. Passing each other in the cereal aisle, meeting for a moment and then never again. And maybe that’s what you are now. Strangers, destined to be in each other’s lives for a moment, and then never again.

Joel eventually goes back home to Austin, and you stay in your beautiful apartment which seems to be mocking you with how big and yet empty it feels.

Joel wonders what life would be like if you’d stayed. You wonder the same thing.

Tag list: @just-some-random-blogger @joeldjarin @pattwtf

#im so luv u #joel miller angst #joel miller fanfic #in this essay we #Youtube

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after-nine-at-the-oasis · 6 months ago

Text

I'M SO NOT OKAY Y'ALL, BUT SO EXCITES

Awww Steve :'))) hi Steve :'D

Hi Glassman 🥰

Hi Lea :D!!

Aww :((

Hi Shaun :DD!

I doubt it but he better not say weeks- okay phew months 😭😭🥺

Still not great though :'((

Awww :'))

Luckily it includes Shaun, and maybe he can help

I doubt it because plot wise but, I hope so xd

:(( honeyy

Took your medical file xD

Awww 😭😭😭😭🥺🥺💔❤️ y'all their relationship has come so far :'))

Last intro :'D 😭😭😭😭💔💔💔💔❤️❤️❤️

Hi Claire :DD!!

Hi Jared :))

Hi Lim 🥰!

Okay okay forgot already but sounds okay <3

Awww guys :'))

LOL yeah obvious xD

AWW y'allll :')) I'm so happy for them <333

Oop xd

Hi Alex :D!

Yeah letting his full name today <33

Hi Morgan :)!!

Hi Dom :D

Hi Charlie :))!!

Hi Jordan 🥰!!

Yeahhh xdd

Awww she knows :'((

They all do (who were here) D':

It is relevant though, if not medically xd

:(( yeah guys he doesn't want it

:'((

Hey guys :'((

"A dying man" 😭😭🥺 he knows she knows

Aww she'll rejoin if he wants 🥺🥺❤️ of course she would :'))

But he doesn't :'( <3

AAUAGAHHHHHH YOU'RE RIGHT IT DOES SUCK 😭😭😭😭💔💔💔

The tears in her eyes are so real :'((

Oop!

Well I mean you're not together xD

Hmm idk that I'd say WITH

Yeahh

Well if that's cool with y'all :)

Him like ". . My ex who I'm not over is back in town-" XD

Well I'm glad they're good :)

Aww guysss :'((

Aww glad Park's being supportive :'))

Ahh so he has to go out of the room xdd

Is he gonna try and convince them to convince Shaun to stop :'((

Awww :'oo :'DD

Ahh yeah try and just keep him up :'(( ❤️

This sucks guys D':

Oop?

UH OH O.O

Ohhh crap

Oh okay just means it's something else?

Still not good 😭😬 DD:

#the good doctor #tgd #oasis's tgd chatter

0 notes

bishiglomper · 8 months ago

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I found out recently my town has an LGBTQ group. It's FB admin is our old DM. 😁

There's gonna be a Happy Hour meetup next week. Booze and queers, whee

I wanna go. But I need someone there to hold my hand. ('～`;)

DON'T wanna people but I want friends. But it's also gonna be at a bar and my audio processing is shit on top of being legit hard of hearing so I need a translator sometimes... just someone I can look at like "wtf did they just ask me" and they can repeat. At least until I acclimate.

Sissy is very overwhelmed lately. So I skipped considering her and gave my niece the phone with the details because: drinking and queers! Two of her favorite things. Also people. She's the most extrovert of the entire household.

I completely forgot she's pregnant and can't drink. Also that she can't do it publicly because she's underage. Whoops.

She's super bummed she can't drink, it's been very difficult for her. She hates it when someone drinks around her. 😬

Bro definitely won't go. Gays make him uncomfortable. He doesn't drink. Also he's super agoraphobic. He doesn't do people. Or being in crowds. Its just a big no.

Mom is sick. She'd probably be a 50/50 chance of going otherwise.

Man. I need friends. 😐

I've been in this tiny ass town for like 17 years, which is 14 more than anywhere else. I have like TWO people I like but arent close to. What the fuck

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allylikethecat · 10 months ago

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Hi hi. So I take the term equestrian quite loosely for myself because I live in a town and am not rich I’ve never had the chance to actually have my own horse. But I’ve been riding horses since I was like 4. My cousin owns a stables that is a couple of hours away from me so that was my introduction to riding.

I don’t compete due to the lack of my own horse but I practice English style riding with show and cross country jumping styles. I’ve also dabbled a little in western riding.

Even though none of them are actually mine bc I rode and helped out at one stables for such a long time it definitely felt like some of them were. Especially there’s this one mare Daisy who is a proper little asshole. She will bite and kick and buck and barely even moves for the lesson kids. But I hopped up on her when I was a kid and we just connected. She was like a different horse altogether.

Anyway I am very much so rambling and I had one other thing to say to you which is and the medicine vinyl. Ik you said it reminds you of the colour of US pill bottles and I find that so interesting bc originally it was made to be the colour of h.

Anyway yeah btw also I am LOVING the daily prompts! Hope ur having a nice day :)

-♥️

Hey! Doesn't matter if you own a horse, or how often you ride! If you've taken lessons you're an equestrian in my book! That's so cool that your cousin owns a stable!

But damn you are much braver than me! I do NOT have the nerve to ever go cross country schooling omg I love watching it but the jumps are so solid? I also prefer English style riding (show jumpers unite!) but Pop is a jack of all trades (re: I get an idea and he is forced to go along with it lol) and we've done a little bit of everything - jumping is what we both like best though. He's a little peanut of a QH that I never had any intentions of buying but is the absolute love of my life, and as a QH I'm so lucky he is so versatile and is game to do a little bit of everything, English and Western, as long as he doesn't have to go through any kind of water including puddles 😂

It's always so special when you meet a horse that you just ~vibe~ with and it's like oh you're my guy/gal. Daisy sounds like such a mare lol was she chestnut as well by chance? I know that they say once you become a mares person they will literally do anything for you.

I also used to have a chestnut Oldenburg mare that I did more upper level show jumping with but that ended in absolute flames and I sold her about a year ago (I'm not sure if I hated her more, or she hated me more by the end lol) 💀 I hope I can one day get another upper level horse especially with Pop getting older but currently I am still terrified to get on any horse that isn't him 😂 Also I am so sorry for rambling on about this I get so excited talking about horses 😬

Oooo you're so right! I'm not a vinyl person (I literally only bought the neon orange Medicine vinyl because i have a weird attachment to the song now after the A&E fic and wanted to frame the sleeve and hang it with all my other 1975 stuff) and completely forgot that was a thing... I feel like that makes it even more poetic that it's the color of medicine/pill bottles in the US now? Even though it probably wasn't on purpose? I have decided that I am going to read into the symbolism and pretend it was on purpose even though I fully made it up (Hey DH - you can steal my idea though and pretend it was on purpose if you want though!)

Thank you so much for following along with the daily prompts! It's been such a fun little exercise and I've really enjoyed working on them! I didn't expect anyone to even read them, and was only posting to hold myself accountable so to find out that other people are enjoying them as well is so special and cool!

Thank you so much for reading, your support and sending in these asks! I apologize for writing little rambling novels in response, just like horses man! They're the BEST!

❤️Ally

#allylikethecat #ask ally #anon ask #fanfiction #keep it kind #matty fic #gatty #fanfic #All The King's Horses #ok so the mare and i were really good to start #but we had a wreck about a year and a half ago that was pretty gnarly #and physically we were both mostly okay (she was fine i was half purple with bruises but i didnt break anything)#but like emotionally we never got over it and things kinda fell apart and my trainer was like we'll give it six months #and if it doesn't get better we can sell her and you can focus on Pop again until we find something else #jokes on her im terrified of riding horses that arent pop now #i sat on my friends super sweet schoolmaster that i've known forever and ridden before #just trotted her around and i thought i was going to die #so anyway it is just Pop and I against the world these days lol #and will probably continue to be that way for a long while longer #i love him so much though #sometimes i'll just be sitting there and start crying because i love him so much #and i like to think he loves me too #in whatever way horses are capable of love #regardless he is my GUY

0 notes

8bitscarlet · 3 years ago

Text

Regrets

Summary: Work always seemed to take priority over Wanda. But for the first time, she's in the front of your mind for possibly the last time.

Paring: Wanda x Reader

Genre/Warnings: Angst (canon violence, blood, injuries, cussing)

Word Count: 5.5k

A/N: This one turned out a little longer than I previously anticipated (because i almost forgot the ending you wanted anon 😬) but happy reading!

*please do not repost or translate my material or claim as yours. reblogs, comments and likes are always appreciated!*

______________________________

Shaking your electrolyte drink, you wipe away the sweat that starts to bead its way down your face. The midafternoon sun is blazing down as your boots crunch against the dry weeds and sand below you. The middle of nowhere for the second time this week and you’re ordered to walk around until something happens. For the past three hours, not a single thing but a few tumbleweeds rolling past and Sam trying to lighten the mood with jokes.

“Look, I’m just saying,” he starts again, staring down at the screen on his wrist as Redwing flies around in search of the enemy trying to sneak up on the team.

“No, no. You’re not saying anything because there’s nothing to say. We’ve been broken up, what, going on five months?”

Sam glances at you, “Oh, so that date you remember?”

You clench your jaw, remembering the argument you had with Wanda just before leaving to this mission. The anger the two of you threw at each other. Separated and still arguing like a married couple. You rip open the bottle in your hand, remembering how you slammed the door without a single goodbye.

Turning the cap of the drink in your hand, you flick it towards his big head, “I will kick you off this mountain and blame it on technical difficulties.”

Drinking the overly sweet and salty drink, Sam slaps his hand against your arm. Coughing as the stinging liquid comes up through your nose, you go to swing your fist but you can see the concentration in his furrowed brows.

“We’ve got movement over in that far building.” He tries to bring Redwing back for another pass as you glance back at the rest of the team trying to find respite in shadows.

Pulling your rifle from your back, you start walking towards the building, “Probably those coyotes we scared off. I’ll go check.”

“You need backup,” Sam starts, his hand rising to press into the radio but you shake your head, already backpedaling towards the building.

“Isn’t that what your little friend is for? Besides, you talking about Wanda is bad juju. Gonna get us all killed, so no more talking for you.”

Without hearing the rest of his argument, you take off in a slow jog. Your eyes scan the buildings around this place, empty and desolate. It was an old HYDRA compound that had been abandoned for decades. Word through SHIELD though was that there might still be some important information that was forgot. The town at the bottom of the mountain was also a prime target to gain more HYDRA sympathizers. So, you were sent here to let the SHIELD agents work their charisma through the town as you waited to see if you were scouring the buildings or blowing them to hell.

The buildings were off limits, that’s what Command had said. They didn’t know what traps were set up in there but that didn’t stop any of you from poking your heads in through the open windows, having Sam drive Redwing around or Nat and Yelena throwing each other onto roofs to peek into the upper floors. All of it was just blown sand and ruined furniture, anything important hidden by time and the elements.

Quietly, you peek around the threshold of the doorway. Scanning for tripwires or blinking red lights as you tried to see further into the building. It was too hard to peek inside to see if anything or anyone was hiding. You had to go inside.

“Stepping inside a building. If something goes boom, Yelena you don’t get my room.”

Russian curse words fill your ear as you press the heel of your boot down onto the creaking wooden floor and rest your weight down. Your breath blows out of your lungs as you take another step and then you’re standing inside of the building. You make your way further in, stepping over and around suspicious piles of sand, carefully opening side doors and looking for anything that’s been disturbed.

It’s all quiet as you make it to the other side of the building and watch a small group of coyotes trotting their way out into the desert. Redwing whirrs around from the side of the house as you give it a little wave,

“All clear, Sam. Now get that thing away,” you swat at the small drone and as you move it out of your vision, you squint into the blinding sand.

Just over the hill, you can see blobs of shimmering black making their way across the sands. Your rifle smacks against your thigh as you tear your binoculars from your belt and try to bring those blobs into focus. And as you do, you don’t think your eyes could grow any wider as you see the length of the caravan coming in at high speeds towards your location. With eyes focused on the approaching enemy, you raise a hand up to the radio on your chest.

“No need to panic, but we’ve got a large number of,” your words are cut short as a distant whistle becomes louder and turns quickly into an explosion.

All of your careful steps are forgotten as your feet leave the ground and you slam straight into the wall behind you. Dust rises up into your lungs as you grasp out against the charred wood around you. Coughing, feeling the explosion of pain in your sides as you feel the impact of the RPG that hit the building, you can see the culprit loading another one on top of the hill.

“Fuck,” you groan out, dragging yourself up to your feet and sprinting towards the nearest exit.

You sprint down the street you were just casually jogging up, towards the rendezvous in the unlikely event that you were attacked. Your lungs are begging for any air to satisfy them, no doubt having crooked ribs pressing against them. Instead, the only thing you can give them are quick and short breaths.

Your legs are slowly dying out on you, the muscles burning and quivering with each stride you take. You grit your teeth and surge forward, using your pounding heart as a rhythm to keep your feet moving and arms chugging.

Making your way closer to the team, you start waving frantically for them to retreat quickly. If they already had RPGs set up, they were watching you and they were starting to dial in more explosions. Steve steps out from the shadows of a building, squinting behind you as everyone readies themselves. They’re expecting soldiers to come running down the street after you. They don’t know hell is about to rain down on them.

“Go!” you yell, Natasha can no doubt hear the panic in your voice. By the time you get halfway to them, she’s already got them up and sprinting.

You cringe, feeling a sharp pain explode through your left shoulder as the hit sends you skidding down onto your knees. A gunshot echoes out through the air as the sound finally catches up with the bullet that whipped through your left shoulder. You let out a yell and glance at the blood coming from the wound in your arm. Yelena is yelling at you to move, kneeling against a broken wall as she tries to find the sniper. Crawling forward, bullets ping the sand around you as you push towards the wall.

Yelena reaches forward, hand gripping your belt as she pulls you towards cover. She falls backwards with a grunt,

“Someone had a heavy breakfast!” she grimaces as she lines up her rifle again.

You roll onto your back, yanking your rifle from your back, “One too many pastries. Do you see them?”

Bullets continue to whiz around your position as you watch the assassin scan the mountain tops, searching for that glint of a scope or the odd shape of a person amongst the stone. Her thumb flicks down and as a bullet hits the wall in front of her, she squeezes the trigger and the bullets stop.

“Ha!” she calls out into the air, flicking back on the safety and turning to tell you she’s got the furthest shot now. Her brown eyes widen, “YN! Eyes up!”

She’s always been fast, probably because of her small size. But she moves faster than you’ve ever seen. One minute she’s cradling her gun and the next she’s sprinting right past you, towards a soldier who got around to flank.

Yelena flips them over her shoulder as her free hand tosses you a knife. You snatch it from the air as you swing it in a wide arch with a yell as you strain your bullet wound. The blade enters into the arm of the soldier as you twist and kick him away, sensing another presence coming from behind you.

A punch hits you in your aching shoulder as the second soldier’s hand wraps around your neck and slams your against the wall. You gag at the abrupt end to the your breathing, the knife falling from your panicked grasp.

Bringing down your fist, their arm bends as you slam your head forward and into their nose. Your hand reaches down to your holster and two shots take down the soldier as you try and gain a sense of the battleground, well the ambush.

Stark is somewhere in the air right now, firing at the mortars meant for you guys and trying to stop the air support from getting closer. He’s buying time for the agents and civilians to get out of the town below and to make sure the team isn’t crushed by missiles. You watch those missiles go streaming through the air, followed close by Stark’s own missiles to put them out of commission. Rockets and grenades shot from the enemy are getting closer and you know the foot soldiers are already there, jumping from the fast moving convoy.

The trucks chase after all of you, the soldiers using the metal sides as cover as you retreat back to the edge of the mountain. Sweat pours down your face, slicking your hands as you try to get any kind of shot off to stop the forces and stop the trucks. You catch Steve’s eyes, as he flings away a mortar that got through and watch it explode just above all of your heads.

The trucks stop, drifting in the soft sand to give cover to the soldiers and you give Steve a nod. It’ll be suicide if all of you try to hold your ground here. The broken walls will only hold for so long and Stark only has so much firepower.

“What’s the plan?” Nat yells, firing off her pistols and grimacing as the bullets just ping off the fuel canister.

“Stark!” Steve yells, “Can you blow these trucks!”

“I’m a little busy, shit,” Tony’s red suit comes screaming through the air, “Trying not to let you guys blow up!”

“Missiles, Stark!” Sam’s wings close and you watch him take a dive down towards the ground. Your heart is racing in your chest as you try to conserve your ammo for what could be a long battle. You hear Sam yell as his wings fling open and he hits a tight turn, sending one of the missiles meant for him straight into one of the trucks.

You can feel the heat from the explosion as you duck behind the wall. Stark lets out a whooping yell but it’s cut off short. Looking up into the sky, you see him extend his hand out and the light from his repulsor lighting up. As the beam shoots out, you watch as it shoots right past the missile as the weapon jerks to the right towards another target.

“Sam!” Steve yells out, slinging his shield through the air and catching the edge of his wings. The missile flies past Sam but he’s not making a pretty landing. He hits the ground hard and Steve takes off towards him as everything starts to blow up.

With Tony distracted as he tried to save Sam, mortars and grenades got past him. It was exactly what the enemy was waiting for. One of those missiles got free and all you could do was scream for the team to move. You couldn’t hold this ledge anymore.

Yelena is the first to take a running leap. She ends up flipping over her legs and tumbling towards the rocks below. Nat follows after her, not finding any luck in gaining any footing on the loose rock either. Across the way, as you kneel down to try and see where they landed, you can see Tony yelling down at Steve with Sam hanging lifelessly over his shoulders.

As you try to get to them, you watch as a bullet slams straight through Sam’s shoulder and into Steve. You yell and wave Tony off before he gets hit, watching Steve lose his balance. Tony surges forward but just misses them and the pair go tumbling down the ledge.

You try your best to go after them, jumping off the ledge and trying to slide down the dirt and rock incline. Landing on your bent leg as you try to steer yourself with your other leg. But your foot catches onto a root of the one species of tree that somehow learned to survive in this place.

Your momentum keeps you moving, pulling your ankle from the root at a painstaking angle and all you can think about is how to stop yourself from rolling. Quickly, you wrap your arms around your head, feeling the sharpness of the jagged rocks against your body. You don’t have time to figure out how to stop your descent or where you’re going to end up, you just keep falling. And falling.

After what seems like miles of falling and cracking bones, your head whips hard against the rocky ground and you’re oblivious to the world around you.

______________________________

“Y/N! Wake up!”

You hear a voice but it seems like it’s coming from a great distance away. You struggle to make your way towards it, trying to reach out with everything you have. You slowly open your eyes, immediately feeling nauseous from the bright light and quickly shut them as you let out huffs of air. You don’t get a lot of time to figure out what’s going on before a shadow blocks the descending sun and you squint through half closed eyes.

The shadow clears out into a black blurry mess and finally you see who it is. You can see through each blink you take, Nat staring down at you as she presses against the side of her head. She seems concerned and you reach out to push yourself up but you can’t move.

“Y/N? Can you hear me?”

You blink rapidly, trying to find your voice. The noise that comes from your throat though, it doesn’t sound like it’s coming from you.

“I’m awake,” you groan out, “Don’t worry about me.” you clench your brows, hearing how mumbled and slurred those few words are.

“Oh, thank god. Your head's bleeding.”

You try to push away her arm, but fail again, “I’m okay,” you shake your head away from the wad of gauze she has in her hands.

You begin to slowly feel your arms and then slowly your legs, heavy and useless. An improvement from feeling nothing, though. There’s a ringing in your ears that’s squealing away with no end in sight. You move your head, gathering your surroundings and seeing where you’ve landed. A good fall from the ledge you were on before and as you peak over, you see that there was plenty of more distance to fall.

“What happened?” you groan out, a fuzziness in your brain that you can’t shake.

“We got ambushed, remember? They were coming in droves. Explosions everywhere?”

Slowly, the memories of the fight come back and you know that you have to start moving. With the sun where it is now, it’s been hours since that happened. You have to get out of here, all of you. Have to meet up with the rest of the team. Wanda. You have to see Wanda.

You slowly work one puppet arm up from the ground and grab the top of a boulder next to you. Your body gradually comes unstuck as you pull yourself up and kneel. The air is hot and dusty and does nothing for your aching throat. You reach back for your water pack but you realize that your backpack must’ve gotten ripped off during your tumble. Your stomach churns as you look around at your wounds and Nat’s. Your head is aching and you can feel the deep stinging of the cuts around your body.

“Are you sure you’re alright?” Nat asks again, tightening a wrap she has on her thigh.

You nod, “Fine. I’m fine.”

The world slowly continues to come into focus. You can’t quite comprehend everything and your legs still want to collapse out from you. But, with this near death experience, you want to get moving. Every second away from Wanda brings more determination to climb up to your feet. To go and tell her that you were wrong. That you gave up too easily.

You touch your temple and stifle the urge to cry out from the pain. As you glance down, you can see the blood sliding down your fingers. At this point, you don’t know where you’re not bleeding.

You glance down at the ground and see your rifle laying there, slowly you bend over to grab it. A wave of pressure rushes over you and you try to steady yourself, unbalanced with the weight of the gun pulling you towards the ground. You look away from the ledge and towards the cliffs below you two, trying to see if you can catch sight of the rest of the team.

It’s completely silent. No gunshots or the sounds of Tony’s repulsors activating. There’s no explosions or Russian curse words. Just eerie silence, except the crunching of dirt from your feet.

You follow after Nat, carefully descending your way through the brush and thin trees. You hold your hand to your head and shut your eyes, trying to find a way to think past your throbbing head. But all that plays through your mind are regrets. Regrets with Wanda. The way you let all of those years together just get thrown away. How you didn’t chase after her when that front door slammed and those headlights went down the road.

The sun gets lower and lower, the sky beginning to turn into those soft sunset colors. The soft yellows and reds, running along the darkening blue of the night sky. You’ve gotta make it down this mountain. Try and find anyone to help you and hope that the enemy isn’t still lurking around.

“We gotta find a way to communicate with the team. My radio’s toast,” Nat says, jogging down the last steep incline that’ll take you into the town, “Try and find a phone.”

You nod, following after her more carefully. If the team was ever separated because of a firefight, the more capable members of the team needed to get back to base. Once they got there and a head count was made, then a search and rescue would be made. The mountain was tall though and it would take a long time to find two missing people.

Carefully, you step into the deserted town and start to clear your way through houses. Quietly yelling to see if anyone was inside. Ripping away rugs for hidden passages into tunnels through the ground and for a working landline. You were coming up empty and both of you were starting to get antsy. Nat jogged ahead of you as you leaned against one of the buildings, gasping for a clear breath as you tried to clear the mucus and dust from your throat.

Nat calls out into the cooling air, “I’m checking this house!”

You wave for her, pushing off the wall and hacking out some dirt from your throat. As you start to step away from the building, through the silence, you hear the softest click and then Nat let out a yell,

“Shit!”

The world rocks around you again. The wall you were just leaning against explodes outwards and the debris just catches you. Windows are blown out and so are your ears, the ringing coming back as you feel the warm blood rolling down your face.

You groan as you roll yourself out of the broken glass and debris around you. You were extremely certain now, you were tired of being blown up.

When you try to sit yourself up, you feel a sharp burning pain explode through your body. You open your eyes as you knock your head back into the wall behind you, letting out a long groan as you try and feel your body with your hands. Your eyes whip around the town, seeing the smoke billowing out from some homes and the shot out debris from others. The whole town was rigged, must’ve been done when the two of you were out cold on the side of that mountain.

“Natasha!” you scream out, hands running down your torso, trying to find any holes.

Glancing down, you see your hands are covered in new blood and as you try to wipe it away, your skin is still stained red.

“That’s a lot of blood,” you breathe out. Your eyes shift and you can see the wound in your abdomen that your hands found, “That’s my blood. That’s a lot of my blood.”

“Natasha!” you yell out again, pulling yourself up to your feet and hobble forward, “Nat!”

You reach the house she was about to check before that tripwire ruined her plans and see her laying halfway out of the house, in the threshold. She’s knocked out cold, blood pouring out from her leg and shrapnel tearing through her uniform. You move quickly, yanking the tourniquets from your belt and hers and making them as tight as they can go.

“This’ll hurt like a bitch when you wake up,” you grunt, tightening the last one on her arm, “But you’ll thank me. Now, come on.”

Groaning, you stand up against your protesting muscles and grab hold of her collar. Slowly, you start dragging her along the sand as you stare at a payphone just across the road. You pray that the explosion didn’t ruin the line as you carefully place Nat on the ground and fall against the metal. Shaking hands reach for the receiver and press it against your ear as you hold your breath.

There’s beeping and you nearly cry, “Oh, Nat. You’re lucky I have coins.” And you start sliding in coin after coin, watching the sun start to dip below the mountains. You know you’ve got to keep the line open for as long as you can, to get it tracked but you can’t remember any numbers to call.

“Come on you useless,” you mutter to yourself, knocking the plastic against your already throbbing head. With eyes closed, you type in the first number that comes to your head.

The phone rings and rings and rings. Your forehead presses against the warm metal as all you feel is the throbbing warmth of the pain through your body. Finally the last ring fills your ears and you hear a soft voice on the other line,

“You’ve reached Wanda Maximoff’s phone and I’m not here to take your call. Please leave a message.”

The beep fills the air and all you can do is fall to your knees, coughing as you start to taste something bitter and metallic in your mouth,

“Hey Wands. It’s uh… it’s me,” you grimace, knocking your head against the pole as your mouth practically rests against the mouthpiece, “You’re probably off on that mission still.” You shake your head, wishing you had thought of any other number to call as you try to stretch out your leg. You tear some of the gauze that sticks out from Nat’s bag and try to push it into your abdomen.

“I just… I know you said that things were too late to try and fix. You never wanted to talk to me and… I’m sorry. For all those nights I stumbled in drunk. Times I grabbed a fistful of weeds and flowers because I forgot we had a date.”

You chuckle, noting how dumb you are right now. Life threatening experience, bleeding out in the middle of nowhere and you call your ex. Nat would smack you with the phone if she were awake right now. Wanda probably won’t even listen to this, just delete the voicemail as soon as she hears your voice.

“I would’ve left if I was you too. And I would’ve forgotten everything we had planned. But I didn’t. I made you hate love songs and give up on a Happily Ever After. And I’m sorry, because I still can’t give that to you.”

You groan, rolling to try and pull yourself up and slide more coins into the machine. You know you have to keep feeding it coins for the line to stay open. You have to keep talking, you have to stay awake and you have to keep finding coins.

“Using up all my change here, Wands. Should’ve probably called Tony but his number is too damn hard to memorize. Besides,” you groan, rustling around your pockets for more money, “I know your number by heart. Because I can’t get you out of my head.”

You can hear your own breathing starting to get slower. The raggedness of a lung having a hard time working and your ribs start to close in. You clear your throat, grimacing at the pain it shoots through your body. Your mouth is dry and starts to stick as your lips start to smack, begging for water. And through all of this, you’re grinning like an idiot to yourself.

Thinking about taking Wanda on that first date through the Aquarium and showing her all of these new animals. The nights you shared together in your apartment and the breakfasts you shared in the mornings. The ring you had hid inside her jacket on what was just a normal evening walk together.

You were dying and all you could think about was the time you had had with Wanda. The time you just threw away because this job that was killing you right now, took up everything you had. And you let it.

“Trying to get this damn radio to work but it’s not…” you blink hard, trying to push the sand from your eyes and to keep your rocking vision steady as you try to sort the wires of your broken radio. “Pretty sure, I’ll be outta blood soon.”

You clear your throat, listening to how your voice cracked as you told Wanda the truth. Your dirty hand rubs against the tears that escape from your eyes, “Being with you… damn it. Best years of my life, Wands. And I screwed it up.”

You shake your head, smacking the radio into the sand when the screen lights up but slowly fades away, “Doesn’t matter…” you mumble to yourself over and over, knocking your head back against the pole.

“Sun’s settin’ and I don’t hear any engines.” you clear your throat, closing your eyes as you start to feel the feeling from your toes and fingers disappear. “Just… those rowdy kids? Give Clint’s kids a kiss for me when you see ‘em again. Tell everyone,” you let out a shaking sigh as your hands begin to shake the phone against your face, “They’re my family. My family. And I need you to do me a favor. Cause, I’m getting tired, Wands. Real tired. Just don’t for-,”

There’s a loud crash that fills your ear and you quickly jerk away from it, groaning through your pain as you hear ragged breathing replace the constant silence that was on the other line.

“Y/N? Y/N! Where are you?” There’s yelling in the background and you can hear Wanda screaming at them to shut up.

You laugh weakly, “Hey, glad you took my call. We made it. Climbed down that mountain.” You can hear frantic talking in the background but you just listen to Wanda’s breathing, just imagining she was sitting next to you, “Nat’s alive. She’s alive. Lucky as shit, too.”

“Y/N, listen to me.” Wanda starts but you just keep on talking.

“Did I ever tell you,”

“Goddammit, listen!”

“Your voice is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever heard?” as the words leave your mouth, you start to hack against the dryness in your throat. Fresh blood spattering against your hand.

“Tell Tony to divert his course!” Wanda yells before you can hear her breathing again, “Listen. They’re combing the top of the mountain for you guys. You just need to hold on until they get over to you.”

Tears are rolling down your face, breaking away from your eyes without any effort. You try to wipe them away but they just keep coming, stinging the cuts on your face.

“I’m so sorry, Wanda. I just…”

“Stop! Please,” she says, the panic in her voice cutting through any calming she was trying to do for you, “You can apologize when you stay alive, alright?”

You run your hands down your blood and sweat soaked uniform, nodding silently to yourself as you see the truth in front of you, “Sure thing, Wands.”

There’s a silence between the two of you. Unspoken words that you wish you could say but you’re still terrified to speak out loud. To admit that you still love her. That when you asked why she stopped wearing her wedding ring, you were hiding yours just the same. You can’t hurt her again.

“Tell me you’re staying alive.”

You suck in a wheezing breath, listening to her sobbing cut through the receiver. You can see her pulling away the phone so you can’t hear her cries, “Can’t break anymore promises, Wands.”

“Stop, listen to me. Tony is two minutes from you. Just… please.”

Her sobs break through now, her shaking breaths striking more pain into your chest. All you want to do is reach through the phone and hold her but you’re stuck in the middle of the desert as the last of your blood trickles out.

“I’m sorry,” your voice cracks, as you press your hand against your burning eyes and let out a cry you’d been holding in for years.

“I know, Y/N. I… You remember our last mission?”

Sucking up a breath, grimacing at the pain it sends through your body, you nod as you rest the phone between your face and the pole. Your arms are starting to grow heavy and so are your eyes.

“Of course, darling.” the words slur from your lips as they barely rise above a whisper.

You can make out the smallest sound of clinking metal and you chuckle, “I still wear my wedding ring.”

Reaching up, you grab hold of the chain around your neck and hold onto it as tight as you can. Your thumb runs along the ring attached to it as the chain pulls against your neck. There’s distant yells but all you can pay attention to are Wanda’s pleads for you to stay alive.

“Don’t forget...”

__________________

Keys jingle in the quiet room, rousing you from the light sleep you'd fallen into on the couch. You groan, grabbing your sore thigh as you try to readjust yourself on the cushions surrounding you.

"Hey," you hear a soft voice, already knowing where it comes from with your eyes still shut.

Cold hands run down your arms, fingers trailing along the yellowed bruises on your face and the bandages that wrap around your head. Sighing, you slowly open your eyes and meet a grinning face, nose scrunched up and bright green eyes looking back at you.

"I'm sleepin' here," you try and push Wanda away but can't stop the grin on your face, "Need my beauty sleep."

"Oh I am so sorry. I forgot the doctor ordered fifteen hours of sleep." Wanda whispers, tapping your now crooked nose and giggling when you flinch away.

You smile, feeling the movement pull at the bruises but the small pain is worth seeing Wanda's own smile. Something you promised never to lose again. After nearly dying in that abandoned town, only thinking about Wanda and all of your regrets, you made a promise. That if you got out of there alive, you'd never take her for granted ever again.

And there you were, bleeding out and on the verge of passing out when you heard the sounds of Stark's suits. The boom of his suit breaking the sound barrier to get to you and Nat. And he got there just in time.

"I need to get more snacks because someone ate all of them," Wanda raises her brows, carefully checking some of your bandages to see if they need to be changed.

You shrug, sitting yourself up as take the water Wanda brought you, "Doc said I had to eat. Gotta follow doctor's orders."

Wanda rolls her eyes, "Uh huh, you follow that one but not taking your pain meds."

You tap your lips, picking up your head slightly and grinning at how she rolls her eyes. Leaning forward, she presses her lips against yours. You sigh, knowing that for the rest of your life you'd always have these lips.

"That's better than any pain med."

Wanda scoffs, pushing off of the couch as she stands and grabs her purse, "Don't forget to walk around please?"

You nod, "Of course. And you don't forget,"

She hums, leaning back down and taking your lips against hers, "Never. I love you, too,"

________________________

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