#i was not emotionally prepared for this
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locking myself in my room and never talking to anyone again cuz WTF WHY ARE THEY DOING THIS TO US!!!!!!!
#court just picks one day a week to kill us#i was not emotionally prepared for this#hate them but also love them sm#shayne topp#courtney miller#shourtney#smosh#smoshblr
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The audacity of them to start the movie while Creep by Radiohead plays in the background and Rocket is singing along!
#guardians of the galaxy#guardians of the galaxy vol. 3#like why would you do this to me#that is like my favorite song#im a wounded soul#i didn't need to see another wounded soul sing along to that song#i should have known this movie was gonna make me an emotional wreck because of it's starting#i was not mentally prepared for this#i was not emotionally prepared for this#i cried so much for that bloody raccoon#i love you rocket#i keep remembering all the scene in the previous movie and rockect's behavior to certain things and now it makes sense why would he do them#rocket raccoon
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holy fucking hell he's dead too
i cant do this
are you guys happyyyy???@!?@? is my misery a game to you?!?!??! does this bring you guys entertainmentt 😣 am i show pony to you guys>!?!??! a bull in the bull fighting shows??!?!?!? /j /lh
i am not ok
#outsiders posting#I AM IN ABSOLUTE AGONY RIGHT NOW#I WAS NOT EXPECTING THIS TO BE SO SAD#ARE U FUCKING KIDDING ME GUYSFIHFVDIGHRF#i saw the opening#i saw ur posts#and iw as like#oo fun#dancing#music#i was not emotionally prepared for this#LMFAOOO
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I’m so sad rn
#shows having an ending after spending a year as a one piece fan SUCKS#i was not emotionally prepared for this#the batman 2004#concha posts
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this is my roman empire
#toronto maple leafs#max domi#conor timmins#nick robertson#pic by bruce bennett#GUYS I AM ASCENDING#I WAS NOT EMOTIONALLY PREPARED FOR THIS
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I'M BEING EDGED
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WHAT DO YOU MEAN THATS IT??!? ITS 3AM IM SITTING HERE VIOLENTLY SOBBING AND ITS OVER??!?
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Just went to watch the new Spider-Man movie and I would like to say that I’m not okay.
#spider man: across the spider verse#spiderman#sony spiderverse#across the spiderverse#spiderverse 2#god help me#i was not emotionally prepared for this#im not okay#i cried like 4 times#jfc dude#that was an experience#it was wonderful
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This is what we've got so far and I'm taking multiple breaks while making it cause I genuinely feel like a big fat degenerate (plus my mom wouldn't stop looking at my phone and I don't really know how to excuse this)
LOOK AT HIM!!! HE'S BEAUTIFUL!! OUR OWN PYSCHOPATHIC LITTLE BABY GIRL!
Izzy!
I Z Z Y
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Listen. LISTEN. I WAS NOT PREPARED FOR THE WILBUR EGG. I WAS MOURNING JUANAFLIPPA AND TILÍN BUT THE QSMP KEEPS THROWING CURVEBALLS AT US WHAT IS HAPPENING
#qsmp#qsmp liveblog#i was not emotionally prepared for this#I really thought we had met all the eggs already
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OMG this week's chapter. I'm sobbing 😭😭😭
But also, Holy Foreshadowing. I have a lot of thoughts.
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I just finished a manga I was reading too fast… I didn’t realize that I only had about 10 chapters left when I started to read tonight… now what do I do…
#I was not emotionally prepared for this#i like to get some stuff out of the way before finishing.#editing screenshots I take and writing fun things about the series down in a notebook#it was taken from me…#but that’s okay#Noragami is better than expected tbh
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It is twelve-twebty-three in the morning and I have "finished" House of Leaves. When I woke up, aware that this would be the session where I put the book aside, I became incredibly aware that there would be no way to talk about it without those dastardly quotes. It feels disingenuous; though it is correct, to a degree, to say that I've reached the point where the Record is done, and all that is left is appendices.
So, the entire Navidson Record has been read. Johnny's footnotes. The Whalstoe Letters from the appendices. I skimmed over the bits and pieces at the end, and followed the notes to whichever references came up, as they came up.
I did not read any of the poems, and there are likely other nifties that I've missed. Describing the final pages of this thing feels a bit like talking about completing in video game terms. You can go for one-hundred percent, or you can just experience the story and shelf it later. For this reason, I say I "finished" it, but didn't finish it (no quotes).
Preamble (pre-ramble?) aside, House of Leaves.
Early this morning, while speaking with a co-worker, I came up with what I felt was a satisfactory description of my feelings for the book: it's a bit like drinking absinthe. There's a very strong reputation to the spirit, just as this book has a reputation: both are mysterious, typically described in elite terms. And so you have this preconceived notion (House of Leaves is impossible to read, it will drive you mad, it's not for the faint of heart; absinthe is hallucinogenic, you'll experience an otherworldly psyche trip), and you build it up in your mind to be this major experience, this huge thing, and you're left a bit disappointed because it's nothing like what everyone tells you it's like.
But House of Leaves, unlike absinthe, at least left me with a pleasing taste in my mouth (actually, I'm eating a bag of græy Skittles, so it might be that). Once you realize what the book is, what it's trying to do, it becomes incredibly straightforward. Er, relatively speaking.
Johnny Truant's sections, in the beginning, did very little for me, though I found them far more desirable than any of those moments where Zampanò drags about physics (describing echoes, the chemistry of the house's walls). This guy is screwed up. I thought Raskolnikov needed therapy when I read Crime and Punishment. Johnny is broken in a way that I was so not ready for. There are not enough drugs in the world to fix this man.
So, there are a few beautiful moments here that just really caught me, and I regret a bit not flagging them. There's a line whose formatting I will not try to replicate, when discussing the potential history of the house, where colonists are wandering, starving, that was wonderfully unpleasant (reminded me a bit of The Jaunt, "It's eternity in there.") There's the story with the dog that I could have lived my life without reading. Halloway's madness was also wonderful to watch unfold.
It's been described as both a love story, and a horror story. Stephen King compares it to Moby-Dick. I feel like there are right ways to read it. And there are wrong ways to read it. Realistically though, it's far more approachable than I would have suspected, and quite a bit more pleasing. There are enter sections I skip when I re-read Notre-Dame, and I believe if I ever read it again, I'll take a similar approach. Perhaps I'll go through the entire book and only read Jonny's footnotes, or I'll only read Zampanò's manuscript. Perhaps I'll skip the Whalstoe Letters and see if reading through without that insight affects my experience.
At the end of the day, or beginning, early morning, whatever, it's an enjoyable read. A lot of work went into crafting this strange tome, and I'm glad I've given it the respect it deserves (you know, once I stopped letting Tears of the Kingdom distract me and actually read the bloody thing).
After this though, and coming off the back of my Philip K. Dick reading, I think I need something normal. Without any substance abuse, or madness, or any thin græy veils masking and disguising what's real. I had intended American Prometheus, but I don't think I'm really up for that. I need something light, a palate cleanser. I recently purchased a beautiful copy of The Neverending Story. Perhaps that will make for a good re-read.
Gives me an excuse to jam out to Lamahl.
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Finish season six of My Hero Academia….emotional damages 😭
#bnha#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#mha#dabi#mha deku#katsuki bakugou#i was not ready#i was not ok#i was not emotionally prepared for this#emotional damage#i cried actual tears#my heart
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*wakes up*
*grabs phone*
*email notification*
*new comment on SotRL*
*throws phone to the far side of adjacent couch*
*goes back to sleep*
#NOT TODAY THANK YOU#not ever. preferably#I was not emotionally prepared for this#look... I think I might be the direct opposite of literally every writer on the planet#because seeing that email made me feel sick to my stomach#this has singlehandedly sent my entire day off kilter#I'm supposed to go to my grandma's today but now all I want to do is rot in bed for the rest of the day#literally anyone else would have been happy to receive a several sentences long comment praising them#but my initial reactions were 'how the fuck did you find this?' 'why the fuck would you read it?' and 'I should've deleted when I wanted to'#I've heard countless stories about sudden comments received years after the last update kicking authors into continuing the story#usually in PSAs to always comment or whatever#but I just feel awful#not because I feel guilty over not finishing SotRL or anything like that#just.. because this is exactly the reason why I wanted to delete that fic#people reading anything I've written makes me want to die but SotRL especially#it's old. the writing is bad. there's a reason I call it my greatest failure#I don't want people to read it. that's why I wanted it gone#and the comment was so nice too. much more than just a call for an update#I hate that it caused this reaction in me because it's clear the person only had the best intentions in mind#but I can't control my emotions. far from the first time I wish that I could#someone put me in the guiness world record book as the first person to ever get genuinely upset over a nice comment#I laugh shit like this off as the mortifying ordeal of being known or whatever but in reality it's so much worse#if I didn't have anything to stop me my entire ao3 account would be gone. I hate the thought of people reading my work#just further proof that I'm not a writer. that I spent six years deluding myself into believing that I was#trying to shove square pieces into triangular holes like a dumb toddler#I should have quit before any of this happened. erased everything and forgotten about it like a bad dream#I should have never started writing in the first place#if I had the chance to go back in time and tell one thing to my 11 year old self it would be to not even think about writing#it has brought me nothing but pain and suffering and I really should have stayed away from it#too late now. I've been irreversibly ruined
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Packing and found this
9 year old me out here being destroyed by fiction
#i was not emotionally prepared for this#funny#kids being kids#inner child#wait till you see…#good omens#ineffable divorce#relatable#relatable quotes
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