#i was listening to all these things that I’ve done from the killers on loop while drawing this | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

moonbeamwritings · 4 years ago

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dark and stormy

Summary: The wind howled as you felt your heart start to pound. You began a mantra in your head that you were fine and a stand user of all people. If anything were to happen, surely you’d be able to handle it. Right?

Author’s Note: Happy Halloween everyone! Stay safe!

“I’ll be fine,” you’d stressed.

“No, I don’t want to take a cab,” you’d said.

Thinking back now you felt kind of foolish.

You’d gone stir-crazy looking at files about stand users and arrows all while having to deal with sitting in complete silence next to Jotaro, cooped up in his Morioh hotel room.

You’d traveled to Morioh after a phone call from the man beside you, asking for help with not only his sixteen year old uncle, but also the serial killer that plagued the small town.

You’d agreed, albeit partially because you wanted to see him again. The phone calls over the years had been brief and inconsistent at best, but the teenage crush you’d developed during the trip to Egypt only seemed to grow.

Throwing the open file back onto the coffee table, you abruptly stood and slipped your shoes on.

“Where are you going?” Jotaro asked, looking up from his stack of files.

“I need a breather… and a snack,” You admitted as you shrugged on your coat.

He rolled his eyes, “Do you really think that’s a good idea? It’s pitch black and pouring out there.”

“You know I’m a stand user, right?”

“I’ll go with you,” he responded, completely brushing you off.

You shook your head almost immediately, “I’ll be fine, Jotaro. You stay here and I’ll bring back some food.”

He was incredibly reluctant to agree. He cared about you, wanted to protect you. The thought of you getting swept away in the storm by some sadistic serial killer really didn’t sound like his cup of tea. Not after everything that happened in Egypt.

He couldn’t lose you too.

Rubbing a hand along his face, he grumbled, “If you don’t come back in twenty minutes, I’ll come looking for you.”

“You worry too much. I’ll be right back.”

He watched you leave, knowing he wouldn’t be able to concentrate while you were gone, “Do I?”

The walk to the convenience store was overwhelmingly uneventful. Sure, it was cold, rainy, and dark, but the streetlights shimmered against the pavement in a way that made you wish you had a camera. You went out of your way to step in some puddles, appreciating the soft sounds they made. As the wind started picking up, you zipped up your coat and pulled the hood a little closer to your head, not wanting to be soaking wet on the walk back.

At the store, you picked up the snack you had been craving and one that you remembered Jotaro had mentioned he liked. With that done, you thanked the cashier and started to venture back to the hotel.

You were a block or two away from the store when an uneasy feeling started to creep its way up your spine. You glanced behind you, seeing nothing.

“Jotaro probably just made me paranoid,” you mumbled, tightening your hold on your hood.

You rounded the corner, lingering under the light of a streetlamp as you surveyed the street ahead of and behind you.

“What the fuck,” you whispered, eyes frantically searching for any sort of reason for your worry.

The wind howled as you felt your heart start to pound. You began a mantra in your head that you were fine and a stand user of all people. If anything were to happen, surely you’d be able to handle it. Right?

The shadows of the trees along the road stretched and crawled along the outside of your vision, too closely resembling hands for you to feel as at ease as you had been on the way out here.

Picking up your pace, you continued along the sidewalk, glancing behind you every few moments. As silly as it sounded, you regretted not allowing Jotaro to tag along. Sure he was quiet, not necessarily verbally comforting, but his presence alone had a special way of calming you down.

Lost in your anxiety, you didn’t even hear the sound of footsteps coming at you. Before you knew it, you were sent stumbling back as you bumped shoulders with the stranger.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” you apologized, quickly fixing your coat and righting yourself, “I wasn’t paying attention.”

The man looked down at you with a faint smirk, face obscured slightly with the lack of proper lighting, “Neither was I. No harm done.”

Something about the way he carried himself made your stomach drop. Something wasn’t right.

God, you really should’ve listened to Jotaro.

“Sorry again,” you mumbled as you stepped away from the stranger, taking a moment to glance up at him.

His black and white hair was slicked back, immaculately styled to match the crisp white of his suit. An umbrella gripped in his right hand.

His smirk never faltered, “Don’t worry about it.”

You picked up your pace again, not even risking a look back at the stranger. You had a sneaking suspicion that your paranoia wasn’t completely unfounded as you felt eyes bore into your back, tracking you as you headed on your way.

Shit.

Looping down a sidestreet, you took a roundabout way back to the hotel, not even caring that the rain was starting to seep through your coat. All you wanted was to be back with Jotaro, safe and warm in the comfort of his room.

The moment you saw the lights of the hotel entrance it took everything in you not to sprint inside.

For the second time that night, you nearly slammed into someone on your way into the lobby, only being stopped by their hands gripping your shoulders.

“Are you alright? You look like you saw a ghost,” Jotaro asked, not moving his hands from your shoulders as he studied your face.

“What are you doing?”

“It’s been twenty minutes.”

If it were any other situation, the implication of that statement would’ve made you smile.

“Are you alright?” He pressed again, concern evident on his face.

“I just bumped into someone creepy. That’s all.”

He opened his mouth to say something before you cut him off, “Don’t you dare say I told you so.”

Jotaro’s mouth quirked up into a tiny smile, “Come on.”

He led you back up to his room as you explained what happened, describing the man with whatever details you could come up with.

“I’ll keep an eye out the next time I go in town. Do you want to shower?”

You shook your head, “I don’t really want to be alone right now.”

He nodded in understanding, disappearing into the bedroom and reappearing moments later, purple sweater in hand.

“At least put this on. You’re shivering.”

You gingerly took the sweater from him before heading into the bathroom to change. You were absolutely swimming in the sweater, engulfed by the smell of Jotaro’s cologne.

When you moved back into the sitting area, you could’ve sworn you saw something like affection flicker across Jotaro’s features, albeit slightly obscured by the brim of his hat.

“Feeling better?”

“A bit.”

You collapsed onto the couch next to him, pulling the sleeves of his sweater down over your hands, relishing in how cozy it was. You couldn’t put your finger on it, but something about the air in the room seemed to have shifted while you were gone. He sat closer to you than he normally did, he’d given you his sweater, he’d given you that look. Your mind replayed it over and over again, trying to figure out if you’d actually seen it.

“I was worried about you.”

“I wish I’d listened to you.”

You both rattled off at the same time, speaking over each other with rushed confessions.

“What?” You’d questioned, interrupting one another again.

“You go,” he muttered, making eye contact with you.

“I just said that I wish I had listened to you.”

He nodded, breaking eye contact again, “I was worried.”

You nodded too, slipping into an uncomfortable silence.

Moments passed with only the hum of the radiator breaking the silence. You fiddled with the hem of the sweater as Jotaro tapped his foot against the floor.

Jotaro let out a long-winded sigh, electing to break the silence despite the rapid beating of his heart, “I’ve been in love with you since we were seventeen.”

You felt your mouth drop open. That was the last thing you’d ever expected to hear come from his mouth.

“Sorry?” Your eyebrows creased together as you snapped your eyes up to look at him.

“Please,” he practically begged, hat pulled down to shield his eyes from your questioning stare, “don’t make me say it again.”

“We’re such idiots,” you laughed, reaching a hand out to push his hat back, “I love you too. I always have.”

You’d never seen a smile quite so bright light up Jotaro’s face. You reached out to cup his face with both hands, rubbing a thumb across his cheekbone.

“Can I kiss you?” He mumbled.

“Yes.”

He closed the distance almost immediately, capturing your lips in a kiss filled with nothing short of pure adoration.

He pulled away first, hand drifting up to run his fingers through your hair.

“I’m coming with you next time,” Jotaro mumbled, pressing his forehead against yours.

“You better.”

#happy halloween!#jotaro x reader #jotaro kujo x reader #jotaro imagine #jjba imagine #jjba x reader

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cherryblossomtease · 3 years ago

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Chapter 18

18 + only (sub reader/bucky, dom zemo, first time m/m, collars/leash kink, and more please see masterlist for full warnings)

Warnings and summary - Masterlist

The directions were simple

“Go into the bedroom, you may help one another, and when you’re done getting ready, wait for me on the bed. The collars are in the bottom drawer…”

Bucky follows you, his hands wandering; stroking your hair, your back, your neck. He’s never going to be able to follow rule three if he keeps this up. You laugh swatting his hand away, trying to avoid his touch as you open the door to the bedroom.

Inside, he watches as you go to the closet and find the items just as Zemo said you would.

“How do we know which are which?” He asks from the bed.

You turn and grin holding them up.

His is thicker, heavier, and you wonder if these were in the crate Oeznik did not open.

“Me first?” You offer going to him.

“Sure” He says and watches you pull your tank top off over your head and toss it onto one of the plush chairs in the room. Bucky surprises you and finds the zipper of your skirt, pulling it down easily. He tugs the silk organza off your hips with a cocky smile as the fabric falls, giving you a little wink that makes you roll your eyes, giggling with your tongue between your teeth. Oh fuck it—your underwear comes sliding down your thighs too— no use pretending this won’t escalate quickly.

“Come closer.” He says and you stand between his legs.

He’s breathing hard already, his eyes bright with the excitement.

You look him over thinking about how beautiful he is. This is an established fact stated so many times it doesn’t need to be said. But you can’t stop looking at him tonight and you know it’s because you’ve lived with and loved him for more than a year now. The many connections between you run deep and now you’ll share in this singular experience with him. You feel… special.

Does he feel hesitant, you wonder eyeing his profile. You did the first time you ever had sex and you desperately want him to know that every time he’s ever tried to play the hero to you, tonight you will be his should he need it— but James is a lucky man. Zemo actually loves him. He won’t find himself under some greasy haired, overly perfumed son of a Low Town gangster who thinks he’s hot shit. You hold in a laugh at the memory of your “first” and his sad, selfish attempts to satisfy you.

Watching Bucky from the corner of your eye, you raise your chin and keep close so he can gather the leather around the back of your neck. He buckles it easily, and you feel that familiar sensation of your body waking up. The clink of the metal, the touch of the leather, your nipples perk, you feel the slippery response between your legs— it’s all nice but you want to focus on him and you hope your desire to care for Bucky as he would you shows through in your own movements.

Pressing the center of the strap to his strong neck, you pull one side and then the other, pausing to kiss his jaw, nipping at his ear, you make him practically giggle involuntarily. He tucks his ear to his shoulder, leaning away from you. You smile and loop the ends, finding the perfect notch. “How’s that?” You ask softly, running your fingers back around and down his neck.

His eyes close as he smiles. “Good. A little tight, but— I like it.” How the tides have turned you think, remembering the first time he ever heard those words from you when he reluctantly fastened you into your restraints.

Your smile matches his as you stroke his scruffy cheek. “Perfect” You quickly unbutton his shirt and smooth your hands under the lapels sliding it off his shoulders and in doing so actually catch a glimpse of a metal loop you hadn’t noticed on the back of the collar at first. “Oh wait. I think there’s more.” You say realizing what that other thing was in the drawer. “Hang on.” You tell him, leaving Bucky shirtless on the bed.

“What is it?” He asks as you go back to the closet and open the bottom drawer. You don’t answer but when you return with a matching leash he tilts his head —a little like Zemo does— looking slightly suspicious.

“This is meant to clip on.” You say wondering how he’ll respond.

Bucky’s eyes go wide for a second. He pushes his palms to his thighs letting this layer of information settle as he leans in and chuckles shaking his head. “He thinks I’m dog now?” He inquires with a brow raised high. He sounds ever so slightly disturbed.

You snicker sweetly “Hush.” You say and go to him. You lean around and clip it on, feeling his hands on your ass as you smooth the length of it out. The leash is long, but not overly done. It’s the perfect length for Zemo to wrap around his hand once and really get a tight grip. “More like, a puppy. A good boy.” You tease trying not to laugh too hard.

Bucky’s look of outrage does it and you can’t hold the laughter in. Still grinning you try to soothe the sting. “Im sorry, I’m only teasing. You’re a very grown man with very large muscles who could probably crush everyone on this ship if he wanted. You’re very scary and we all fear you.”

“Oh ha ha. You’re so funny,”

“Aw, okay I’m sorry. Really.” You say meaning it.

He glances up and you can tell he’s not really mad, you’ve teased him about looking like the least intimidating killer before, which truth be told is something you probably shouldn’t joke about given the hurt he’s caused but it was never his choice. “Listen.” You say and lay your hands on his chest. “I think he made it very clear how he feels about you James.” You say his name so he knows you’re not playing anymore and it works like it always does.

Bucky looks up at you, studying your face for a second or two before he breaks, and looks away flashing the widest smile.

“By the way. When did you tell him? How you feel I mean.”

He thinks back as if he can’t remember. “This morning.” He says a little awkwardly.

So that explains why he was acting so off and sort of fidgety all day, and why Zemo has been so quiet. “And he clearly didn’t say it back.”

Bucky looks down as though he still feels the sting of rejection. “It was —not good. We were on the top deck laughing about something and I just, well I went for it. I looked him in the eyes, I held his hand and told him. He just stared at me. Eventually he said something like thank you, I think, I dunno, I sort of blacked out a little.” He says looking towards the windows “He said he needed to “attend to something” and walked away. He kissed me first though” He says with a sad laugh.

“And you’ve just been acting like nothing happened all day?” You hate that he’s kept it to himself, what an awful thing to suffer through; then again, it is Bucky. He’s known worse.

“What else was I supposed to do?”

“Tell me?”

“Why so you could make it a thing?”

“Well yeah?”

“I’m not a kid.” He says your name and you back down a little “I’m a grown man. I’ve had my heart broken”

“And put back together.” You remind him.

His eyes dart up to meet yours and slowly his smile returns. You know he’s thinking about the dance and the beautiful moment that followed. “Yeah. Turns out he wasn’t as ready as you thought he would be. But it didn’t take long.” He says sounding a little smug.

“I never had a doubt about Helmut’s love for you. I wouldn’t have wanted you to come with me if I weren’t sure. So,” You gently pull the strap around letting him see, “when it comes to things like this you just have to be honest. He trusts that you will, that we will. If you don’t want the leash James, don’t have it. Never be too proud to say no.”

He’s listening and you can see him actually thinking about it. Probably assessing his boundaries and weighing them against his love for Helmut and his level of comfort. He’s not used to this feeling, you can tell. He’s so physically strong, there are times he probably feels invincible. He’s certainly not used to being intimidated by the idea of the unknown. But tonight you suppose it’s more than that. “Are you sure you want this?” You ask wondering.

Bucky leans back surprised by the question. “More than anything.” He says without hesitation. You exhale the breath you’re holding feeling elated for tonight to become the start of so much more.

“You look beautiful by the way, you have all night.” He says softly “I meant to say so earlier.”

Damn it Barnes.

Your lips meet in a soft kiss and you lean against his chest feeling small in the warm space between his legs as his hands slowly glide across your back holding you so close…

The bedroom door opens and you part.

Turning in Bucky’s arms you’re fully aware that together you must paint the prettiest picture. The way Zemo gazes across the room at the two of you, this notion is quickly confirmed.

He has to stop in the doorway and just take it in. You’ve never seen him at a loss like this before. But you’re standing naked wearing the collar he chose for you with your arms around the man he thought he would never have, now in his own soft black leather restraint and that leash held loose in your hand.

You slide it up slowly over Bucky’s bare chest letting it drag across his skin and he closes his eyes against the rousing tickle until it falls over his back. You know damn well what you’re doing as you look back at the Baron with big, innocent eyes.

“Get up.” Zemo says, his already rough voice gone deep like it does when he’s ready to destroy you both.

Bucky gently moves you aside and stands.

“Take off the rest of your clothes.”

You stand beside Bucky watching him strip.

“And why are you still standing?” Zemo asks the second Bucky is finished, as if it’s laughable that either of you should think to do anything other than kneel before him. Funny though, he doesn’t have say it again before you’re both on your knees.

“Safe words” Zemo says unbuttoning his shirt as he comes closer.

“Rapunzel.”

“Streusel”

“Songs” He says, undoing his pants, slipping them down and off.

“Anything from the sound of music.”

“Penny’s from heaven.”

“Colors James?”

“Red means stop, yellow means slow,” Bucky’s breath catches and you glance over to find the Baron pulling his head back by the hair just a little “Green— means go.”

Zemo slowly reaches with his other hand and grips the leash letting go of Bucky’s hair, but he keeps him in this back bent position as he trails his fingers down over Bucky’s face and traces his lips, lowering to kiss him before letting go of the leather strip. Bucky’s soft moan as he melts into the kiss makes the deepest center of your belly quiver as you take a stuttered breath in.

Zemo holds his face in both hands now, the tip of his nose grazing over Bucky’s, his lips gently kissing his closed eyelids and his forehead before leaving him.

Moving silently Zemo comes to you so quickly you hardly have time to catch your breath before his mouth closes in and your eyes roll shut as his tongue finds yours with ease. It is an unexpectedly calm kiss that makes your skin tingle. He knows that when he kisses you like this, you feel both his affection for you and completely overpowered; so much so that you do nothing but submit to whatever it is he wants. He licks the crest of your top lip, presses a soft kiss to you again moaning very quietly and smiles at you.

“Sweet girl… you taste like James tonight. Have you been kissing him?”

“Only a little.”

He laughs “It’s all right. I like it.” He lifts your chin holding onto your jaw as he smooths his hand onto the top of your head, keeping it there. He sighs deep in his chest, and you look up at him waiting, wondering if he will show you his gentle side…

He sighs and smiles at you shaking his head just a little “You do like to tease me don’t you?” He clicks his tongue with a disapproving tsk-tsk. “Oh, I will enjoy this.” He pets your head and you watch the way he looks you over; naked, on your knees, willing to be his completely and there is the most beautiful darkness in his kind eyes.

You swallow feeling your throat resist the collar. You want to smile but you’re a little afraid of what he means and you know better than to assume.

“James.” He says looking over, with you still held close in this slightly awkward position.

“Yes Baron.”

“Go to the center of the room, sit and wait.”

“Yes Baron,” He says and gets up leaving your line of sight.

His grip on your face tightens. “Beautiful girl.” Zemo says looking back down at you, his eyes wild like they were before he was sent away, “Forgive me. I will enjoy this…”

Bucky never looks away from your punishments anymore. Now he watches with a jealous sort of lust that makes it all the better.

His eyes are fixed on you as he waits from his place in the center of the room and you are momentarily distracted by him which is nice because you need a break from the pain.

“You do like to tease, don’t you.” Zemo says circling you slowly. He sighs pretending to feel sorry for you.

Your fingers are interlaced on top of your head and you don’t dare put them down again after he gave your palms a slap with the leather— how silly that you hadn’t considered that the leash could be used against you. Now you’re here paying for underestimating Zemo and your earlier actions.

Your lips and eyes shut tight but you manage to open you mouth and answer him. “Yes Baron.”

“I know.” He says, his tone all too cool. He steps in front of you again and you wait breathing fast knowing that it’s coming.

That thin leash strikes the tops of your thighs licking your skin with the heat of fire and you hold in your cries, looking across the room at Bucky whose narrowed gaze shows some ounce of sympathy, but mostly you see how badly he wants to get up, push Zemo out of the way and fuck you.

When the next few strikes criss cross your thighs in a pattern of pain you give in, unable to take more and sink down onto your heels, your shaking breath nearly turning to tears.

Zemo stops and comes over pulling you back up onto your knees by your elbows. “Look at me.”

You won’t

“Look at me.”

You open your eyes but you hate him right now.

“Don’t tease.” He says shaking his head. He smiles and kisses your cheek, ignoring your angry face. “But, I have to admit, you are an incredible dancer. Next time, let me touch the parts I like most, yes?” He asks tweaking the tip of your nose.

You roll your eyes but quickly mumble. “Yes Baron”

He laughs a little and kisses your forehead. “So feisty tonight,” He says petting your head. “Should we continue until I’ve whipped it out of you?” He asks, standing with the leash dangling in his hand, both the front and backs of your thighs stinging.

“No! I’m sorry.” You insist while thinking back to how you shook your ass in the lounge and how you can’t wait to do it again. Maybe next time you’ll be able to take more of the consequences…

He smiles stroking your face.

“Fine.” He gazes down at you for a little while until you calm and eventually his hand feels as good on your skin as it ever has. “James.” He calls.

“Yes Baron.”

Zemo walks over going around behind Bucky and clips the leash back onto his collar, the sound is soft but chilling. You see the way Bucky’s eyes close and his muscles tense. “Come, let’s make her feel better. I think she’s learned her lesson enough for tonight.”

Both their eyes are on you.

You watch Zemo take that leash in hand and wrap it around his palm closing it in his fist like you knew he would, but you’re curious if he’ll actually take the next step, so you wait holding your breath. Sure enough, as he orders you to lay on your back with your legs spread, Zemo pulls Bucky along making him cross the short distance on all fours.

Holy shit…

“I want to hear her say your name.” Zemo says as Bucky lowers “I want you to make her come like you did while I was away.”

Bucky does not hesitate and your entire body responds to the warmth of his mouth closing in on you. Your toes curl to points, your knees bend boxing him in, your back arches high letting your chin lift until the top of your head is nearly touching the floor.

He licks up the center of your divide parting your lips to circle your entrance quickly, you can hear and feel his arousal as soft, muffled moaning against your wet center and when he slides his hands under your ass and raises you up like a plate to be licked clean you nearly scream.

As he finds a good rhythm it does begin to feel just like New York. Bucky always loved burrying his face between your legs for as long as you wanted him to, there was never a rush, never any pressure to hurry, just this sort of lazy enjoyment that consumed you both.

Helmuts voice sounds very distant as he asks, “Does it feel good?” He already knows.

“Yes” You sigh feeling relaxed after a while, Bucky’s fingers press into the fleshy parts of your backside and you smile.

The sharp crack of leather on skin makes you jump and your eyes fly open. Bucky gives a surprised but subdued yelp that gets lost against you.

Helmut doesn’t want you relaxed, he wants you screaming.

You’re dropped to the floor and the flicking of Bucky’s tongue becomes a heavy, more determined effort, amplified by the way he moans as Zemo takes a knee behind him and directs his attention to parts of the soldier’s body that you can’t see.

So it’s like that tonight.

It might be out of your line of sight, but you can imagine what’s happening based on the lovely sounds Bucky is making; all those deep moans laced with a hint of pain and you open your eyes gasping as he vigorously begins to suck your clitoris.

From the throws of your rising orgasm, you sense eyes on you and manage to look. Helmut is watching, left hand down busy with Bucky between the two of you.

“Let go, don’t hold back.” He says looking in your eyes as you pant. “I like to see it. I like to see the way you nearly cry when he makes your thighs shake and you say his name when you look at me.”

When you moan it’s the sort that you’re not in control of, it’s a response to the things Zemo is saying to you, a reflex that grips and holds as tight as your collar.

His right hand glides across the horizon of Bucky’s raised ass, the leash rolling along with it and you toss your head back and flex every muscle as Barnes puts his all into devouring your pussy.

His head moves up and down as he works his tongue, but it is the sight of that single, otherwise innocuous bit of black leather held by the man in control of it all that sends you over the edge.

“Would you like to come?” He asks his favorite question.

“Please,” You beg.

He pulls the leash; you feel the loss of pressure which is maddening. That smug little smile on Zemo’s mouth making it both better and worse.

“Please Baron.”

“Did you ever think of me when he fucked you?” He asks suddenly curious. "When he licked you like he is now?”

“Sometimes,” You confess still breathless.

Zemo frowns and pulls the leash harder. The muscle of his arm flexes and you hate him when he denies you a climax but he looks so good doing it. Bucky rises up to sitting to stop from being choked.

On even level with Bucky now, Zemo reaches around to grab his wet chin. “You were a good substitute soldat I’ll give you that much… she does seem ready to come, what do you think?”

Bucky gazes down at you licking his lips slowly—tasting, you, smelling you— he’s happier than he’s letting on and you know he’s just thankful for the permission to have your legs wrapped around his neck again. A hint of his own dominance flickers in his eyes. He stares at you with your thighs parted for him, moaning softly as they rock open and shut from wanting more. “Yes Baron. She does.” He says and the way they look, towering over you together with Zemo like a dark shadow behind the tightly wound power of Bucky; you bite your lip and swallow hard so ready to be devoured.

“Go on, finish her off,” Zemo says and gives him the slack needed. He pushes Bucky back down and the wonderfully obedient Sergeant dives back in.

The pause only makes the continuation better and when you see Zemo reach between Bucky’s legs again, you feel, not hear Bucky’s response as a deep, heavy moan that vibrates against you.

Your orgasm is nearly instant.

The rhythmic pressure rises until its inescapable; your voice goes high and your body jerks once with the perfect shock of pleasure, holding tight until you melt into the pulsing release, moaning again and again, thrusting against his face until you are shaking and yes, in the end you say his name. Just as your Baron wants. You breathe it, gasp it, reach and pull his hair, shoving his face deeper into the throbbing result of his skilled tongue as you smile “James” You sigh releasing him as you sink to the floor with a shiver so happy to have said it.

In the dizzying afterglow — your arm draped over your eyes, your breath shallow, your legs completely useless— you keep your eyes closed until their sloppy kiss breaks the silence.

“And now, you taste like her” Helmut says with a soft laugh against him, followed by the distinct sound Bucky makes when anyone touches him, especially on the underside of his shaft where he’s so sensitive it’s almost cruel— you really do love that sound.

From under lazy half open eyelids, you watch the smooth motion of Zemo’s hand stroking Bucky a few times. His smiling approval has a warm humming tone as the solider grows harder in his hand, and then Zemo kisses Bucky’s cheek, gets up and leaves him throbbing.

You just close your eyes again, still feeling so high.

Helmuts return rouses you and when you manage to open your eyes it’s just in time to see the blindfold come down covering Buckys’.

He goes stiff, alerted and resistant for a moment, but Helmut is there whispering to him in Sokovian to calm him like one would a prize stallion. He takes a knee behind Bucky and gently slides the elastic band further down around the back of his head.

With a look of lust and wonder at the man he gets to have, Helmut smiles and smooths his hands down both of Bucky’s shoulders, kissing the metal one as he slips his hand through the space between his arm and waist to lay it flat against Bucky’s stomach pulling him close.

“Can you feel how hard you make me?” His deep voice sounds needy in Bucky’s ear.

You sit up a bit, somewhat recovered from your climax and watch the way Bucky’s pretty mouth opens, how he doesn’t know what to say, how his powerful form looks both stronger in his bondage and yet so ready to submit.

“Answer me.”

“Yes Baron.” He says, barely audible.

“Are you afraid of this? Of me?”

“No…”

“Good” His eyes peer down at you in the dark “Come” He motions with his free hand, two fingers like he does inside of you, “Take him to the bed.”

You stand slowly, accepting Bucky’s leash, raising it high as it can only be done from the back and pull him up. For a moment you feel every ounce of control and power that Zemo must, then you take his hand and lead the man along.

“We’re at the bed” You say and lay his hand down letting him feel it. Bucky’s not so timid as you might be without your sight and you’ve been in his position many times before, but you can feel him being careful as he follows you onto the cool bedding.

“On your back” Zemo tells you not far behind.

You crawl up to the pillows and turn over.

“Legs open, he’ll find you.” Zemo says with confidence in Bucky.

“Go to her James.” He says, his eyes flitting from you to Bucky’s profile and along the length of his beautiful form.

For a second you don’t think he will, but he does in fact make his way to you and quite easily. Super heroes— you grin and roll your eyes. Bucky finds your foot and you flinch, giggling from the tickle. He smiles too and gently grabs your ankle, smoothing his hand up to your knee, his fingers reaching and then closing over the curve as he waits to be told what to do with his head tilted ever so slightly as he listens for Zemo’s voice.

Watching from the edge of the bed, Zemo looks distant and detached in a way that sends a chill down your back but you don’t mind, there’s something thrilling in the voyeuristic nature of it. “You may break rule three.” He finally says.

With a soft gasp of surprise you stare at Helmut a little shocked to hear him say it. Bucky however does not need to be told twice.

He parts your knees and you suck in your bottom lip watching the White Wolf hover over you.

His silhouette is stunning. Just long curving lines of tense muscle and power and that vibranium shining black and gold, reflecting the moonlight from the large windows.

Both his hands move up to your thighs before you can stop him and you hiss from the pain— a reminder of Helmuts earlier punishment. Bucky loosens his grip instantly choosing instead to slide his metal arm under your hips, pulling you down flat onto the bed. You look down between your bodies and see him so hard and so ready that he’s making you eager for it in spite of already feeling spent. He however could go all night.

Bucky lifts your ass while lowering his own to blindly find and spear you without hesitation.

You gasp like the air has been knocked from your lungs. Your fingers dig into the flesh of his shoulder and neck and his open mouth finds yours as he starts to thrust, punching his hips forward. Your loud, awful cries are muffled by his deep kiss. He’s been craving you since the last time and it shows.

“She feels so good after she comes.” Helmut says now on the bed with you. “Theres nothing quite like it” He’s close, you hear him just over Bucky’s shoulder but your eyes stay shut.

“Yes” Bucky exhales in your ear holding you so tight. “She feels incredible” He moans.

“So do you.” Helmut says, and you let your eyes open to find him beside you. He’s watching with the hard look of a man who loves as much as he wants to destroy. It makes you smile before you look away just as Bucky jerks his hips forward drawing a loud cry from you. “Don’t stop James. Whatever you feel, don’t stop,” Helmut says, his voice fading.

You slide your head over a little and see him behind Bucky running his hand down the man’s back. He then reaches back and you hear the snap of a bottle but you can’t see so you close your eyes to listen.

“Don’t stop.” Helmut mumbles again.

Bucky disobeys almost instantly. The leash is pulled. The smack to his ass is loud. He starts again and you smile, loving the feel of his ordered thrusting, though it is hesitant. He lets go of you and reaches up, running his fingers over the black satin that blinds him like he might take it off but thinks better of it and keeps fucking you instead.

“You’ve had this before.” Helmut says assuring him that it’s nothing new.

Bucky groans a little slowly grinding against you though he turns his head to the side. “You’ll make me come.” He says, his jaw clenched, voice deep and harsh in warning as he licks his lips, pressing them tight with a tense moan.

“Not yet.”

You stroke his hair where it’s very short at the nape of his neck and nip at his ear, “Don’t come” You say softly and he turns back to you, the tension easing in his shoulders a little as he fucks you just a bit faster.

“Slowly.” Helmut tells him and Bucky moves his hand in close to touch your face, his thumb stroking your cheek. You kiss it and lay your own hand over his, letting him feel your smile as you moan from the way he moves. “Like before, yes?” Helmut says.

“Mmhm” He agrees.

”Just like before so that you will know what to expect, even when it’s not the same” Helmut says softly and you open your eyes. Bucky turns his head left to right, curious, excited and nervous. He opens his mouth and you stare at it, hypnotized by the way he expresses every second of what he feels. He bites down on his lip but lets go just as quickly with a gasp, a moan, a sharp hiss and you feel his cock twitch inside of you.

That, must have been two fingers.

He takes it though, and turns back to you slowly, cautiously starting to draw back and push forward again enjoying the stimulation that will make what comes next easier.

“Are you okay?” You whisper through your own shallow breathing as you kiss along his collar bone and run your fingers down his arms.

“Yes” He damn near growls and kisses you hard.

Lost in the feel of his perfect lips and thick cock, just as he starts to find the perfect rhythm, you’re taken by surprise when you feel Bucky groan deeply. He pulls away, turning his head again and even through the blindfold you can see his deep frown.

With one hand firm on Bucky’s side, his fingers pressing deep into his ribs, the Baron’s words melt into Sokovian and his eyes close. You aren’t sure at first, not until you see his right hand on Bucky’s back pushing down just a little and Bucky’s thrust stop completely— not because he’s been told to. Then you know.

The sound, god that soft, unmistakable sound of being taken fills the room and for once it’s not coming from you.

You hold your own breath and reach up cradling his face. You want to look into his eyes but the blindfold was put there by the man you both obey and you think you understand why. It has him so keyed into every touch, it’s heightened even the lightest sensation, that you wonder if it’s fair, it must be so intense, but it’s already happening. And you realize that as good as Bucky still feels inside of you the fact that Helmut is almost inside of him nearly pushes you over the edge.

With his hands tight on Bucky’s waist, you listen to Helmut moan deeply as he pushes past the resistance to smoothly but very slowly, inch by inch, fill him.

Bucky is loud in your ear, louder than you thought he would be and you smile holding him tight until he sighs sounding somehow both relieved and overwhelmed.

“It’s done.” Helmut says between tight breaths leaning over him, “Are you all right?”

Bucky nods against you.

With his cock finally sheathed and the two people he loves beneath him, you get a taste of what the future holds as the Baron starts to, in a sense, fuck you both.

Helmut pulls back. You can tell because Bucky shakes his head in protest, just a little. He pushes up between you like he might want to stop but you stroke his face and bring him back down showering him with kisses until your tongues are playfully rolling along and he seems to be reminded of how good it feels to be buried in your tight walls with you flexing and pulsing around him, so that when Helmut thrust back into him again you both moan together.

He pulls from your lips mouthing “Oh… fuck” with a stuttered breath and if he’d said it, it would have been a shout.

It’s enough to make you moan again beneath them and for a second you close your eyes just letting it happen to you instead of being a part of it until his tone changes and you think maybe its to much…

Helmut pulls the leash and brings Bucky up somewhere halfway between the two of you. “Are you all right?” He asks again reaching to turn Bucky’s face to profile, letting his lips brush his ear. Bucky flashes a breathy smile and nods reaching back, his cold fingers spreading across the top of Helmuts thigh. “Yes.” He manages.

Helmut smiles then, thrusting slowly up and in, laying his head on Bucky’s shoulder to make them moan together and the resulting slow return of Bucky's cock into you makes you join them.

Helmut lays a slow line of kisses across his neck, towards his shoulder, one hand curved over the black and gold, the other snaked around his waist and against his solid stomach as he controls himself, fucking him just a little faster now.

Bucky is as noisy as you are. He hisses when Helmut draws back, his fingers gripping harder on the top of the Baron’s thigh. Zemo unwraps the leash from around his hand and pushes Bucky back down wanting to see you both again.

You moan at the feel of him deeper inside of you, but look beyond Bucky to Helmut; he’s so beautiful with his brow furrowed as he fucks. He looks down at you, legs spread, pussy filled with another man’s cock. He loves it and reaches for you and you for him, your fingers finding one another to interlace. He looks deep into your eyes, his gaze fixed and he refuses to break the link between you even as he bluntly thrust into Bucky until any notion of his “first time” is completely destroyed. Bucky so perfectly becomes this submissive, moaning mess between you.

“Please,” He gasps, your fingers tracing his collar as he raises up “Please, I can’t hold back.”

Helmut just leans over him sighing against his back, holding him tight.

“It’s too much” Bucky says and you try not to moan but the weight of Helmut pushes Him into you and he feels so good.

“Do you want me to come?” Helmut asks sitting up.

“Yes” Bucky answers.”

“And would you like to come?”

“Yes. Please!” He pleads.

Helmut smiles at you, quickly taking your hand to kiss your fingers before letting go and grabbing Bucky’s waist to hold him down. He draws back and snaps his hips forward making the man truly cry out for the first time and you wrap your arms around his neck feeling yourself pulse. You try to hold back too.

Helmut moans deeply enough to get your attention but when you open your eyes and see the look on his face, you know it’s not over yet.

“Beg.” He demands

“Please.” Bucky says in your arms.

“Louder.”

“Please may I come.”

Helmut leans down, his cock drawing back and out, Bucky’s head raising as he does his mouth open looking anxious.

“Louder.” He shoves forward again driving into him which pushes him deeper into you and you press your forehead into his his chest as Bucky nearly cries into the pillow.

“Please Baron.” He actually begs. “Please, I can’t take it… I can’t take more.” And you can hear it in his voice, he’s not talking about the denial.

“Yes.” Zemo exhales in his ear. “Yes come.”

Bucky pushes up showing just a fraction of his strength, and you truly don’t know who is fucking who harder.

Someone has taken hold of your ankles, some else is pushing down on your knees. Bucky’s body flexes and he thrust deep, pushed further by Zemo. He moans through a clenched jaw going stiff before the pulse and warm rush which sends you over the edge with your own climax and you gasp as you cling to him wondering if you’ll always come together now.

The familiar sound of Helmut sighing loudly and breathing hard tells you that he’s only a second behind the two of you. You wish you could touch him…

Bucky is very still as it happens. You watch him openly accept Helmut’s warm ropes of come. You watch him feel exactly what you do right now, what you have countless times— that explosive finalization of being claimed by the man who dominates you so perfectly.

And when the heavy breathing slows, when everyone calms a bit, when you all start to ease back and away— it’s over.

“Bucky” You whisper.

He turns his head towards your voice and knows the tone. Its how you say his name when you’re worried. He smiles a little and leans down to kiss you lightly. Good. He’s not broken.

But maybe you are…

You can’t move, you don’t even want to try, you just wait until the layers of bodies fall away and the cool bedroom air hits your skin and slowly, scared to know what shape your lower half is in, you close your legs, feeling the deep ache in your hips. Your body is spent.

Time passes slowly before you move again and when you do, you prop yourself up onto your elbow somewhat surprised to find Helmut beside you and not Bucky. He’s on the other side lying on his stomach.

The blindfold is on the pillow and his eyes are open. His unfocused gaze seems a little shaken but at least he’s smiling.

“Did we hurt you?” He asks blinking and glancing up when he notices you staring.

Still the damn hero. After all that. “No Bucky.” You smile and roll your eyes laying back down, curling up beside the Baron who rubs your thigh. “You didn’t hurt me.”

You sigh deeply and let your mind go blank closing your eyes again, welcoming the calming silence.

“James” You hear from the edge of the bed.

You must have fallen asleep.

You think Bucky might have too, but you can’t tell. He looks down and Helmut motions for him.

He’s moving slow, rubbing his eyes, groaning as he twists onto his back, but Bucky does finally go and sit beside him.

Helmut motions for him to lower his head which he does and gently he unclips the leash and takes the collar from around his neck, pulling it free.

Bucky raises his head looking into those soft brown eyes for a while, the unspoken affection enough for a moment until he slowly folds into the Baron’s arms.

You turn onto your back wincing from all of your aches listening to their softly spoken words some of which are so low that you can’t make out exactly what they’re saying and that’s okay— but what you can hear is everything it should be.

“Not always.” Zemo is saying in answer to a question you missed. His arm is still around Bucky’s shoulders. “Whatever you want is what I’ll give you. You know my nature and I know yours but, never forget my many sides James.” He teases calling back to the earlier conversation.

Bucky sits up “I haven’t. And like I said. I want— well all of it— everything. You. Her.” He looks back over his shoulder and you smile at one another as he reaches back and strokes his hand down the curving arch of your foot.

Bucky looks back at Helmut and sighs. “I thought I knew how it would be… I had no idea.” He says still processing everything thats just happened.

Helmut looks at him and your heart aches with love as you’re sure his does. Bucky is the oldest person in the room with so much to learn. “It’s late, and if we keep on I’ll start getting emotional, I think Whitney Houston has a song about it and she’ll start fucking, dancing again” He tosses a nod in your direction like he just doesn’t know what to do with you.

You laugh from the pillows “Hey!”

“Go on,” Zemo says smiling “Get cleaned up and I’ll send her in after you.”

Bucky nods happily accepting a firm but quick kiss. “Yes Baron” He says with a hint of sarcasm. The submission is fading to the confines of the collar for now and Helmut watches him get up and walk away, with only the slightest change in his gait.

When he says your name you take Bucky’s place and bend your head letting Helmut remove your collar next. He unbuckles it and slides it off, dropping it to the bed; rubbing your neck, kissing where the buckle was. “Now lie back, let me see the rest” He says softly.

You don’t know what he means, but you do anyway.

Helmut bends over you and kisses the now dull, nearly forgotten marks left behind from the leash, but you still flinch. “I don’t mind when you dance, not in the least.” He confesses against your skin and you shut your eyes smiling. Oh. “You dance as much as you want to” He kisses the other leg tracing the fading lines towards your inner thigh. “When you want to and how you want to. So long as you know I’ll probably always find a reason to punish you” He says squeezing your hip, making you laugh. He pulls himself up coming closer and lets his chin rest on your stomach for a second. Helmut looks up at you and sighs rubbing your stomach with his hand flat. “You know that I love you? You— feel it?”

Your heart flutters with an unexpected rush of so many things. You know why he’s asking. A lot of this has been about Bucky, so now Zemo is checking in, making sure you still feel seen —Your dear, wonderful Baron.

You stroke his hair back lost in the clear brown gaze. “I need you to know, to always know.” He sits up sliding close along the edge of the bed so that he can look down at your face as a stream of Sokovian words tumble from his lips, his deep voice laying over your naked body like a blanket. “It’s clear this relationship involves three people and I may share my heart with him, but my love for you is no less. If anything I’m thankful to have a woman like you,” He pauses to lay his hand to your face, the heat of his palm against your cheek feels calming. “Someone capable of bringing the three of us together, no one else could have made this happen, just you.”

“Me?” You ask looking up at him leaning against his touch just a little more.

He nods “Yes, of course. Don’t be modest.” Helmut says stroking your cheek. “I may have loved him first, but you reminded me that it was safe to feel that way in the first place after everything… and to say the words out loud” You can see him thinking back, probably to the night you first declared your true feelings for him as only you would, and it makes him laugh softly. “I loved him first, but you were and are the one I need, so that I may love without fear.”

You feel that sunlight on your face, that warmth that only comes when Baron Zemo looks at you. Sometimes you feel like you will burn too bright from the heat of it; like a struck match. Sometimes you fear you will burn to ash…

You shut your eyes. Anything to break the spell.

He says your name softly and you open them a little embarrassed to find tears blurring your vision. Helmut wipes the stream that falls before you can stop them from falling down the side of your face with the back of his hand and bends to kiss you gently.

He pulls you up to sitting keeping you close.

“Thank you.” You say in his arms. He nods as he looks you over, like he’s looking to make sure you have no physical injuries he needs to care for and brushes a lash from your cheek before smoothing another tear with his thumb.

“No more tears. Go and get cleaned up, yes? You look tired, I was hard on you again."

You laugh hanging your head. “Both of us.”

He joins the laughter rubbing your back inhaling deeply through his teeth, the memories of tonight so good they hurt. “You don’t know; you have know no idea what it’s like to see the two of you…” You lean to the side to see his face clearly, “When you’re both beneath me, and you look small enough to break and he looks like a god” He smiles, a warm laugh mixed with a breath “And you’re both mine.” His smile fades into a look more serious. “And I am yours.”

You’re hopelessly in love with this man and lean in kissing him until you both feel the possibility of it becoming more which really should not physically happen, so you pull away.

“Go on.” He says tapping your leg. “Go and get clean and then come to bed.”

“What about you?”

“I’ll use the smaller bathroom across the hall”

”Okay, I’ll make sure Bucky’s okay too” You add and he smiles but looks up towards the door like he’s suddenly very worried “I’m sure he’s fine.”

You get up but stop and turn back to find him just sitting there looking off, lost in his thoughts. “Helmut?”

“Yes?” He looks at you, the shadows along his face making the sharp angles so pretty.

“Did you think you’d end up loving us both?” You ask and you can see that your question has surprised him.

He looks past you to the bathroom door again listening to the running water of the shower, then back at you for some time before finally answering. “I didn’t think I would give myself the chance.” He says and flashes a smile, the truth surprising even him. “Luckily I don’t always listen to the voices in my head.”

Authors Notes: I'm busy working on the final parts of this story as I've been learning how to work Tumblr thanks to the ever patient, ever wonderful, ever amazing @natbarnes1917 who is basically the best human alive and you should all go and read all of her stuff because it will make your day infinitely better. Thanks for your support and help bestie! and for encouraging me to never delete a single smut scene because why have one bj when you can have two!

#fatws #zemo x reader #winterbaron #bucky barnes x reader #baron zemo fanfiction #helmut zemo #baron zemo #zemo smut #zemo fanfic #james bucky barnes x reader #Bucky barnes/zemo #winterbaron romance #winterbaron x you #winterbaron fic

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chitto · 4 years ago

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I Analyzed All Of the Songs on Ranboo’s Lore Playlist and Here’s What I Learned.

We can pick a few themes out from the songs:

Time

Fighting something inside of you

Alluding to a villain arc

Transition of a person

My biggest theory from all this is that c!Ranboo is a time traveler from the future (probably before Mizu but after the Haunted Mansion). He traveled to the past, November 27th specifically, to stop c!Tommy’s exile. We can assume that in c!Ranboo’s future, c!Tommy burned down c!George’s house by himself but when c!Ranboo went back, he got caught up in it, thus creating a time paradox. (Evidence from the songs Merry-Go-Round of Life, all songs of Hawaii - Part Two by Miracle Musical, and The Ruler of Everything). Now knowing he is the cause of c!Tommy’s exile, c!Ranboo feels immense amounts of guilt for his actions, the regret keeping him up at night (Ain’t No Rest for The Wicked). This mental stress is something that has resulted in the beginnings of insanity for c!Ranboo (The Mind Electric).

A villain arc is very plausible for c!Ranboo in the near future, most likely brought up by harm coming to c!Tubbo or Michael (Killer Queen, Mr. Bad Guy, I Can’t Decide, Ain’t No Rest for the Wicked, and Live and Let Die)

Full Analysis on Each Song Under the Cut:

(All Song Lyric Analysis Credits go to the wonderful people on genius, I merely fit them into the context of the DreamSmp and c!Ranboo)

Prologue (StarKid) - A simple ticking clock. ARG trailer tie in as well as even more references of time.

Introduction to the Snow (Miracle Musical) - Comes off an album that (storywise) has the listener loop over and over the songs in the album, as a time paradox.

Dream Sweet in Sea Major (Miracle Musical) - Final song in the album (loops). Occurs in three movements. Tells the story of a sailor that gives himself up to the mermaids. Lyrics don’t give much in terms of hints at anything.

Turn the Lights Off (Tally Hall) - About a journey through puberty and adolescence (??) perhaps could be changed to fit. However main name of the song is meant to convey accepting differences and confronting fears, something c!Ranboo doesn’t really do. First line also says ‘Don’t go in there, you’ll become one, Freaky creatures, monster party’ perhaps relating to the enderwalk/possession c!Ranboo goes through.

The Mind Electric (Miracle Musical) - The song starts off in reverse, the singer speaking backwards. Once the song straightens out, we’re shown that the protagonist of the song is a mentally unstable man trying to figure out what triggers a specific fear. The second verse then goes into a young child who’s been held trial for insanity. The child and the judge then have an open dialogue throughout the rest of the verse until the child is sent to an asylum. The song concludes with insane yet peaceful thoughts from the child. Obviously I’m not a psychiatrist but doing some light research into insanity (NOT psychosis, as insanity is more of an umbrella term for unstable mental state while psychosis is a specified disorder) you can see a few signs of insanity that could be applied to c!Ranboo. ‘Denial of obvious problems’ Many times c! Ranboo has dismissed or downplayed his issues and problems, most notably when he’s found in a panicked state by c!Sam who asks him if he’s okay, to which c!Ranboo replies that he’s fine. ‘Delusions or Hallucinations’ this is a big one as throughout the Doomsday arc, c!Ranboo spoke to c!Dream in his panic room, only to realize he was talking to no one. ‘Dramatic changes in sleeping habits’ This is more of a reach as we have no actually confirmation but it could be assumed that c!Ranboo’s enderwalking could be disrupting his sleep patterns.

Live and Let Die (Paul McCartney) - a song about a once young person who used to say ‘Live and Let Live’ but has now changed their maxim to ‘Live and Let Die’. Could be said that as people grow older they grow more cynical. Granted the phrases mean the same thing but one seems much more pessimistic.

The Ruler of Everything (Tally Hall) - Once again a song about time, the entire song meant to symbolize how time controls our lives (once again feeding into a time paradox theory). The song has a verse that is a man and Time itself singing. The song then starts to speed up, representing how short periods of our lives can be in the grand scheme of things. ‘Do you understand that mechanical hands are the ruler of everything’ This lyric of the song is meant to mean that time (the mechanical hands of the clock) are at the root of everything, once again drawing us back to a time motif with Ranboo’s character. This specific line could lead us to believe that c!Ranboo is being ‘controlled’ by time, aka perhaps caught in a time travelers loop.

Merry-Go-Round Of Life (Howl’s Moving Castle OST) - While the song itself is an instrumental without words, one could do some digging into the story of Howl’s Moving Castle, spoilers for the film in this analysis. In Howl’s Moving Castle, there is a sequence in which Sophie goes back in time to find Howl, seeing him as a young boy. She calls out to him, telling him to find her in the future, before getting taken back to her time. It seems pretty insignificant until you remember that in the beginning of the film, during Howl and Sophie’s first interaction he says to her, “There you are, sweetheart, sorry I’m late. I was looking everywhere.” thus representing that Howl has been looking for Sophie his entire life after she called out to him in the past. So what does this mean for c!Ranboo? Well its just more time motif and even more time paradox themes. But what even is a time paradox? A time paradox is when somebody who has traveled back in time, becomes a part of the past and causes the events they set out to stop in the first place. Perhaps this means c!Ranboo traveled back in time to stop c!Tommy’s exile, as it was a catalyst event that resulted in many problems on the server (L’manberg’s second destruction to name one) before getting sucked into the events that caused it himself.

Killer Queen (Queen) - Really can’t say too much for this song as the song is meant to convey how “that classy people can be whores as well” (Freddie Mercury). Freddie also said that anyone else could call their own interpretations of the song as well. I can’t really think of too much about the song that could be molded to c!Ranboo.

Mr. Bad Guy (Freddie Mercury) - This one is more interesting as the bridge of this song details how Freddie is ‘Mr. Bad Guy’ and that he can ruin people’s lives and many people are afraid of him. This could sound like something c!Ranboo would say in relation to someone trying to threaten the people he cares about. c!Ranboo going to any length for those he cares about (most notably his family) is something that recently cc!Ranboo has tried to drive home, making it a tweet under his character’s lore thread on twitter.

Ain’t No Rest For The Wicked (Cage the Elephant) - The main line of this song is a bible verse that means that those who are sin-free can sleep well at night knowing they haven’t done anything wrong but those are commit sins need to keep one eye open at all times. Perhaps c!Ranboo believes that he has done something wrong that keeps him up at night. It could be tied back to the time paradox theory by saying that c!Ranboo is kept up at night by the fact that he couldn’t stop the bad events from happening, even becoming a part of them.

The Bidding (Tally Hall) - While the song itself is about an auction in which men are trying to “sell” themselves to a woman, I would like to call attention to one specific verse. ‘I’ve been training like a Pavlov dog, Let my independence out to take a hike, All you gotta do is activate my bell, and I’ll fetch you anything you like’. The first lyric calls reference to Ivan Pavlov, who ran a conditioning experiment on dogs, training them to associate the sound of a bell with food, whether they actually got food or not. The last two lyrics I find particularly interesting as we have seen somebody “activate” c!Ranboo. c!Sapnap. After c!Sapnap visited c!Dream in prison, c!Dream asked c!Sapnap to deliver a message to c!Ranboo. The message being ‘:)’. When c!Sapnap repeated the message to c!Ranboo, c!Ranboo immediately switched and began to speak in enderman language before wandering off. He then spoke to c!Sapnap in chat saying, in ender, “Doomed are those who try to run, for it always catches up eventually :)’. This is one of many incidents of c!Ranboo being switched into his enderwalk state, in which he does stuff for c!Dream such as burning down the community house.

I Can’t Decide (Scissor Sisters) - This song is a upbeat song about a psychotic killer trying to decide on whether or not he should kill his victim. This song could relate back to c!Ranboo’s relationship with c!Dream. c!Ranboo has been very cagey on whether or not he would like c!Dream, most recently being very eager to break into prison and murder him. This song could also hint towards a possible villain arc for c!Ranboo.

Stardust Crusaders (JoJo’s Bizarre Adventures OST) - Unfortunately, this song is another instrumental. And even more unfortunately, I don’t watch JJBA so I can’t comment on what the song could be alluding to. Stardust Crusaders is the name of an arc of the show but reading through the plot summary on Wikipedia doesn’t turn back anything that could be tied to c!Ranboo.

A Mask of My Own Face (Lemon Demon) - While the song itself is relatively simple, a man singing about how he wants to wear a mask of his own face to confuse people, a few lines have sparked certain people to examine the song deeper coming to the conclusion that the singer wants to cause chaos and controversy. The mask of his own face would allow him to mask his identity, as no one would wear a mask of their own face, while still allowing him to be associated with the chaos. For c!Ranboo I can’t really see this pointing to anything but the Syndicate. c!Ranboo really does believe in their core value of dismantling the things on the server that are bad but also he knows many people he’s close to who are at odds with members of the Syndicate, most notable c!Tubbo. However this could be rather lose as cc!Ranboo is a big fan of Lemon Demon and who hasn’t put a song from their favorite artist on a playlist even though the vibe doesn’t necessarily fit.

Stranded Lullaby (Miracle Musical) - Another song of the Miracle Musical album Hawaii - Part Two, which loops itself over within the story. This particular song is about a sailor sailing through a cerebral ocean, which may or may not represent time itself; the sailor being a time traveler who had a mistake in his time traveling. This once again brings us back to the theory of c!Ranboo as a time traveler. There is also a line I would like to call upon, ‘Aimless thoughts and papers blown around, A million moments meant remembered rest in deep dark sound’. These lyrics are meant to relate to memories and how truly fleeting some may be, just papers floating in our brains eventually lost to time. This obviously can relate back to c!Ranboo’s memory problems, which are a known side effect of time travel, as told to us through the story of c!Karl, the only other time traveler on the server (excluding c!Connor who is only theorized as a time traveler for right now).

Hidden In The Sand (Tally Hall) - This is slightly complicated as the song has two meanings. On the surface, the song is about a man who falls in love with a woman who leaves him, however the man is still in love with her. But in the music video, a new meaning can be found. The music video shows a cruise full of people, all very nice and kind until the ship begins to sink and the real, selfish, sides of the people is revealed. ‘Hidden in the Sand’ is meant to symbolize that a persons true nature is covered up by their outward acts and personality. This could apply to c!Ranboo, as he is outwardly very polite and gentle, growing attached to every animal he finds and refusing to kill any Enderman but he could have a whole other personality to him that we don’t know about. If songs such as ‘I Can’t Decide’ and ‘Mr. Bad Guy’ are any hints, we could theorize that c!Ranboo has a secret dark side to him that could be exposed in the events of his family being threatened.

Now I’m Here (Queen) - No statements or theories about what the song means or any of the lyrics.

& (Tally Hall) - This song, as with others off this particular album, deal with opposites. The whole chorus of this song is about certain opposites such as dark and light or cold and hot. Relating back to c!Ranboo, perhaps this song is meant to tell us that c!Ranboo is a foil of a certain character. Possibilities could be c!Dream and c!Ranboo, as c!Dream is very against attachments towards things and is a very outwardly violent person while c!Ranboo is attached to almost every animal and enderman (not to mention c!Tubbo and Michael) and is a very peaceful person, or perhaps c!Ranboo and c!Karl, the two time (theorized) travelers on the server. c!Karl has a stronger control over his abilities and seems to retain most of his memory fairly well so far while c!Ranboo perhaps can’t control his power and has short term memory loss and can’t remember where he came from.

I’m Gonna Win (Rob Cantor) - This song is a description of a fight between the singer and his inner demons, the fight resulting in very physical injuries for the singer. This can relate back to c!Ranboo, as he could be fighting the demons of his enderwalking state. This song has a very cheerful outlook on the fight however, as the singer is very confident in his abilities and knows he will win. c!Ranboo isn’t always the most positive, sometimes believing more in the pessimistic outcome but this could be a new leaf for c!Ranboo or a goal of his to be more positive.

#please rb #this took a very long time #dsmp #dream smp #dreamsmp #ranboo #ranboo dsmp #dsmp ranboo #ranboo lore #c!ranboo #dsmp theory #dsmp analysis #dsmp meta

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rataltouille · 4 years ago

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BONFIRE, BONFIRE!: A COLLECTION OF FLASH FICTION + POETRY

so i’ve decided to compile all twenty [these will be split into two so that the post isn’t super long] of the writing pieces i’ve done for my random celebration into one post so that it’s easier to read / access share!! you can also find it here, all put into one work, on wattpad, because i feel nostalgic about that website and decided to just post it!!

NOTE: i know that this shouldn't need to be said, but these 20 pieces belong to me so please don’t copy/repurpose it for your writing!! i plan on using these somewhere in my own writing and either way they’re stuff i’ve written so don’t use them!!

1. cooking + destructive + purple from @andiwriteunderthemoon [also i kind of cheated with this prompt and asked my sis @dreamscanbenightmarestoo for ideas and so the base idea’s from her!!]

I didn’t mean to set my house on fire, alright?

Let me set the scene: I’m sitting in my room, watching the infomercials that blur together, and suddenly there’s a bright purple flash on the glitching screen: /grapes/. They’re shiny, plump, and oh? A recipe for fine wine? Don’t mind if I do. So I pop into my kitchen and cut the grapes, dice them up, finally using the knife after years of not cooking— /mother, are you proud of me now?/— and stick the soft, luminescent fluid into a glass bottle. Following each step of the recipe.

The recipe didn’t mention an explosion.

Destruction rained around my house like a meteor shower. The bubbles from the fluid, frisking up at contact with metal, swam across my shoes and into the living room. It touched the TV, which still flashed the recipe, which I was still cursing at. And then, you know, it burnt up. The couch scorched first, I think. So that was fun. I later realised that I’d used my reserve of petroleum, which I’d put in my kitchen cabinet, instead of vinegar. I think I’ve got to move back in with my mother again.

2. running + quiet + sky blue from @kryskakikomi [i have no idea what this is i drafted this in a fever dream state]

Summer crawled up his skin like a worm. He was seated at his dining table, crosswording his way through the sticky morning, when it struck him that the humidity was new. He’d been caught in summer before, of course, but this year was different. His parents had whisked away to their hometown, and he still didn’t understand why he wasn’t allowed to go. He loved their home— he could have been running on beach sand and waves could have cruised over his feet, and his face would reflect sky blue under palm trees. Instead he sat doodling and scratching at cement walls in a quiet that nagged at his ears, grappling his flesh like a fishing hook, reeling him in. Boredom, him sister told him, before she also left for someone’s home. What would you know? he whispered once the door latched from the outside. Maybe /she’d/ like to sit on the same wooden chair, all the pink paint worn out, and scratch out squares of empty text until the pen poked through the other hand. He scoffed. At least he knew the number of scars on the wood; he could hold that over her when his parents returned.

3. hallucinate + hazy + violet from @chloeswords [i wanted to write something dreamy and ethereal but everytime i look at your url i’m reminded of church mud and indirectly my religious trauma so here we are 🤡]

We hold the book in our arms and chant for God. We don’t know what he looks like. They say that he’s sharp, never pixelating or blurring or showing through, like a hazy image would. No, children, our family says, he will come clothed in gold and velvet— the colour a deep and rich crimson, or chartreuse. And of course, he weaves a violet into his hair. Because he is just that humble. Just that gentle. Loving.

We’ve almost understood now. Pray, clasp our palms together into a transient equinox, and pray. Maybe he will shine down on us. Maybe we will speak so loud and chant so long that our lips will chap. Maybe we’ll simply hallucinate him to salve our bones. Our family says, he will bless you. And so he will.

4. halcyon + pluviophile + beige from anon [i was yearning for cats i am a cat person i love cats]

I remember my life before I moved to London,

Those halcyon days that I spent scooping up cat litter and brushing warm fur,

Being a mother to beige and white and black little felines.

They keep better company than humans.

Now I’m a self-proclaimed businesswoman, artist, influencer, pluviophile,

Even when I’ve barely stepped foot outside during the rain,

[But it needs to be said that when it rains in London, it pours].

I think I’d like to open a cat cafe;

I’m rich enough to pull it off.

5. sing + vulnerable + olive green from @occiidens [this was actually super fun to write because it’s a break from the typically unhinged stories i gravitate towards]

You watch from the highest hill of your town, hand wrapped around the serrated wood of a red oak tree. The bark pokes into your flesh, drawing blood that shouldn’t have been taken from you. You scowl. Just another thing that lives to cause you pain.

Three storeys down is a young man, short and smiling and lovely. He has dark skin and darker hair, walking with the stride of a deer, and he’s smiling; the joy reflects onto your face, even though you can’t hear him. He wears a cotton shirt, the olive green stark against the fire-blue sky. You call out, sing his name, three times in a row.

When he finally looks up, squinting as you silhouette under the sun, the smile widens. A wave. You’re suddenly overcome with embarrassment. Your palm digs into the bark until the wound is freshly dug again, the skin supple and vulnerable. You want to wave, but your hands would look so awkward, and the blood wouldn't help. So you turn on your heel and run— why are you so awkward?— and the grass around you is brighter. This is now a tomorrow issue, you conclude. You’re still smiling.

6. dislocate + ostentatious + blood red from @oasis-of-you [this got really unhinged really fast. TW: body horror]

If you take a turn at Finn Avenue,

Rogue your way down a blood red river,

[It’s not actual blood, do not worry. The colour’s a pigment and it’s saturated enough to give you the texture, the touch, the taste of blood, but I repeat, it isn’t true blood. You might think that it’s ostentatious of us to make you cross a river like that, but you’ll understand why.]

And if can stick your fingers inside the fluid,

You’ll find a bone.

Don’t pull it out fully! Only observe.

[This is a real bone, most likely animal. We may be ominous, but we don’t hurt humans. Not yet.]

So what do you do now? You want passage into a better world.

You came here because you saw the brochure, the flyer,

Radiant Idyll, home for love, but you also saw the jutting anatomy that leads to the city. The pictures were rather clear.

Why do you look so surprised? We’ve put this on the brochure— don’t you ever read the fine print?— to avoid this exact situation. That you would cross a body, a skeleton, pooled over in a fluid that we don’t name, but it’s probably alive.

It’s watching you right now.

So what do you do now?

Hurry up, unhinge your arm, dislocate the elbow, drop it into the blood, forgive me, false blood, and pay for your passage.

Oh! Excellent; that’s record time. We do hope you enjoy your stay!

1. @noteaboy [i’ve interpreted your url as ”note, a boy”]

There’s an orange tree. It’s spring, and there’s an orange tree, and it brims with fruit and citrus perfume. Point your lens flare downwards, and note, a boy. A young man, perhaps, because he combs his hair, uptight and firm, and he wears a tie. A long suit. He doesn’t look up, because his hand holds a book. /He/ holds the book, not the hands— tenderness doesn’t translate through anatomy, I’ve taught you this before. He’s waiting for someone. There’s only the rustle of leaves. He drops the book onto the lap of the tree, crushing the apple that had fallen down. Orange, not apple. Take note better. You only have one chance to get this right.

2. @eatingjupiter [your url is so beautiful omg]

The goddess had said this before she died: you need to watch over him. He needs your sentry to survive. The goddess’ words weren’t heeded. Little baby Jupiter tottered on lava as him parents small-talked with their kingdom. Well, it must have been small talk, because nothing seemed to happen afterwards other than his mother’s face collapsing in agony, anger, annoyance. He knew not to touch them then. He’d fly off into the sun one day, but if his hands were but and charred, he wouldn’t survive even a third of the journey.

The prophecy was simple: the firstborn to the kingdom will metamorph into a celestial, purify themselves so that only stardust remains. Live in the sky forever. The astrologers were baffled; you don’t just become a star. They should have heeded the goddess.

Jupiter was sixteen when he expanded and collapsed all at once. He still lives, they say, and the astrologers /were/ right, in a way: people just don’t become stars. They become almost empty space. Nobody knows if his hands were burnt when they left earth’s orbit forever.

3. @laughtracksonata [your name gave me slight horror vibes idk why!!]

Hahaha. The Horror Movie (don’t ask me for a name, I’m not good with those), with its cymbal crashing and plastic sounds, it’s so loud and scary that it hurts, father. Please turn it off.

Father doesn't listen. I shiver on the couch. The screen flickers like radio static and reflects off our wide eyes. What kind of a home is this anyway? I don’t want to fucking listen to a laugh track or a horror VHS tape or watch the bass crescendo as the serial killer jumpscares the watcher. I don’t think that having hour pupils glued to the same blood-splattered movie, with the same recording looping in his eardrums will help him. He laughs along, sometimes. It’s scary. Father needs a new hobby.

PART TWO COMING SOON!!

anyway this got REALLY long so i’m posting the third prompt group, the one based on songs, as a second part in some time. i hope you enjoy this, and PLEASE do boost!! i spent a lot of time writing these pieces and am pretty proud of them :’)

general taglist: @lovingyou-is @guulabjamuns @andiwriteunderthemoon @coffeeandcalligraphy @melonmilk @silentlylostwriter @charles-joseph-writes @eklavvya @eowynandfaramir @bitterwitchwrites @laughtracksonata @whatwordsdidnttouch @indeliblewrites @thenataliawrites @summersguilt @illimani-gibberish @sarahkelsiwrites @writing-in-delirium @shaelinwrites @sienna-writes @chewingthescenery @jennawritesstories @chloeswords @aelenko @keira-is-writing @cherylinanika @infinitely-empty-pages @jmtwrites @august-iswriting @freedelusionbanana @beetleblue88 @mistercaleb @iwannawritepls @hanwatchingmovies @mortallynuttyqueen @idratherliveinnarnia @maisulli @thegreyboywrites @ahowlinwolf @ravens-and-rivers @oasis-of-you @yanittawrites @chazza-writes-sometimes @skyfirewrites @lovebenders @treybriggsthewriter @themidnxghtwriter @ash-karter @queen-devasena @a-procrastination-addict @gaymityblight @beyondthebracken @madmaxst26 @adielwrites @moonpixxel @hollow-knight-dnd @keep-looking-here @overlap @ashleygarciawrites @ryns-ramblings @wordsbynathan @novaemlynlewis @sophiewritingstuff @howdy-writes @occiidens @nsanelyawkward @viawrites-andacts

#writeblr #am writing #flash fiction #poetry #wtwcommunity #ofcolourtracking #crabappletracking #anyway part two probably in a couple days #i still have to start writing them 🤡✌️#bonfire bonfire

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notmrskennedy · 4 years ago

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Eight Seconds

Howdy! I’m honestly freaking out bc this the first Spencer Reid anything I’ve written and bc I try not to out myself as country too much bc well the world right now. (I honestly wish there was more people out there who had a thing for cowgirls/boys as I do.) I hope at least one person enjoys it as much as I liked writing it.

Summary: Spencer Reid meets the cowgirl of his dreams...

Warnings: I think I swear like twice? other than that it’s fluff

Word count: 4.5k

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He doesn’t think that it would be Penelope Garcia to catch him. Sure, she’s a genius and a tech wizard and an overall queen at gathering gossip. But she isn’t around him as much as JJ. Or Emily. Or Morgan.

What gave him away to her and not everyone else?

Because he knows he’s given something away when she texts him. Urgent. Batcave now! He’s hopeful. Optimistic. Maybe Penelope’s got some burning question about Star Trek. Or Doctor Who. Or when the next convention is. Maybe it’s a serial killer.

But he isn’t that lucky. Spencer Reid never is.

He knocks hesitantly, worried for exactly what’s to come. Her gaze snaps up from her tablet. Snaps to him in an incessant kind of ‘I know what you did’ way. It’s a look for scolding children. Not a pleasant, let’s have a tea time chat, gaze.

Spencer settles into the extra chair and waits. There’s a storm brewing behind her eyes and when she finally speaks, she doesn’t disappoint.

“What’s her name?”

And he can’t stop it. Lovesick smile, starry eyes—Penelope doesn’t have to be a profiler to see it before he sobers up. Her mouth opens into a toothy grin. An insufferably contagious grin and he knows he’s caught for sure.

He leans back in the desk chair, stares up at the ceiling and breathily whispers, “Shawn.”

“Oh!” Penelope gasps. He can hear the mental scolding. There’s backtracking with no end in sight. “Well, I didn’t mean to presume and it’s—it’s okay if Shawn is—or you’re—and I just didn’t know—you never said anything—“

“Relax,” he chuckles and grins at her softly for good measure. “Shawn is a girl. Her legal name is Shawna if you’re that curious.”

And he knows Penelope is curious. She’s grinning and waiting and listening. He can tell she wants to prompt. To ask questions. To dig through every tiny detail she can. Is it bad to make her wait? To not want anyone to know about the girlfriend he’s kept hidden for so long?

“Tell me more,” Penelope buzzes, bouncing in her seat, monitors—work—forgotten. “Where did you love story begin?”

He smiles to himself. It’s not a matter of when, but how long.

It took eight seconds. All of eight seconds.

At first, he wasn’t even sure it was eight seconds. He’d been running, running harder than he ever had. Chucks flapping against the hard packed dirt. Horse trailers flying by him as he jumped hitches and slipped through patches of mud.

It was five minutes of burning lungs and dust caked nostrils before those eight seconds. Quick glances between trailers. Got to keep moving, Reid, got to keep up. Because Morgan’s chanting was getting distant, too distant. The last time they’d split up—

Five minutes of a maze he hadn’t learned. Five minutes of being utterly lost, following the sound of Morgan’s thundering boots and desperation. They were all desperate. It was a desperate move to keep running, not to find solace in an empty horse trailer on the killer’s part. The bastard thought he could lose them, shake the FBI agents off his tail.

Reid knew better, but he was getting desperate too. His lungs were burning. It’d only been five minutes.

“FBI! Stop!” Morgan shouted from behind him. Reid skidded through a patch of horse shit into the main thoroughfare. Thank god. No more trailers. A walkway, a solid walkway, a clear line of sight. The man was running. Why do they always run?

Reid picks up his lungs in his desperate hands and pushes on. Grits his teeth, clenches down on every spare inch of fortitude left. Morgan catches up easily but doesn’t surpass. They’re both tired. They’re both panting. They’ve both got weapons drawn, but who could make a shot at 50 yards with a moving target?

Not Reid. He knew better.

But Morgan tried one more time. Shouted and called and screamed. The man didn’t look back. Prison was on his heels and he was desperate enough to keep running. A coward. There wouldn’t be a standoff. Smart enough to not get cornered, not smart enough to keep from getting caught.

They both pushed harder. This was their eight seconds. They were getting close, they reasoned to themselves, hearts panting to the same rhythm. They could keep it together for these last seconds. He’d get tired—they were getting tired—he had to be tired by now.

He was racing in snakeskin cowboy boots. How could he be keeping that pace in those shoes?

Reid hoped his lungs would give out. Save the heroic work for Morgan. Morgan could get the bad guy. Morgan could get the girl. He could have anything he wanted. Reid just wanted to fall face first into the dirt and let the fresh mud extinguish the flames in his lungs. In his throat. In his mouth.

But then the eight seconds came.

In the first second, he realised his heart didn’t gallop. It didn’t have the imprints of hooves. It wasn’t the two thousand pound animal gaining momentum behind him. His heart was clogging his ears that badly. Thankfully, with his wits about him, he looked back.

In the second second, Reid saw the animal. Mid-step, perfect stride. A plastic figurine of a race horse, nostrils wide at the end of its long face. It took only the second second to see the crazy in the horse’s eyes. How they focused and blinked and bled the insanity. How it was more beast than domesticated pet. Reid was convinced the black stockings on its legs were dripping grease from its gears. He could see the muscle in its shoulders and flanks. Muscle groupings bigger than him. An animal that could crush him. A machine running with a single thought: faster.

He saw the rider in the third second. One he didn’t expect. Maybe it was his own memories of cowboy movies, but cowboys weren’t supposed to be dipped in glitter. Weren’t supposed to be such overtly female. But there she was. Her dark curls billowing behind her. Sun glinting off the gold of her hat. Glinting off the impressive amount of glitter on her eyelids. And the rhinestones on her black button-down. She was stunning. Furrowed in her concentration. Elated in her grin.

The rope came in the fourth. It was twisting in her hand, coil and reins held precariously in her other. It loops over her head, slack enough to swallow her whole. Slack enough to get caught on her. Get caught on the horse. She keeps perfect control and the hand comes around and around until she—

In the fifth second, the rope releases and Reid slows his feet to watch it. The horse has gained on the man, so close that teeth could get involved. The man doesn’t seem to know, or is too desperate to change direction. Because he’s gone straight and the horse has followed and the rope is sliding through her hand like it’s meant to be there forever. It goes and goes and goes. He thinks the loop is bound to catch her foot, a hoof, something. But it doesn’t. It never does.

With six seconds down, the man finds he doesn’t have feet anymore. The loop of the rope tightens around his legs and he’s falling. He doesn’t have feet under him. Barely hands to save his face. Reid hopes the fall is harder than it needs to be. But he’s not focused on the man, he’s focused on the girl. The girl who expertly catches the rope in her hands. Who expertly ties the end around the saddle horn. Who’s horse pulls the rope taut and the man goes down.

At seven seconds, the horse is still backing. It knows. It’s practiced. Reid can see the elation on both rider and animal. Their pride is palpable. He doesn’t know it, but this is the best run they’ve done together. Not the fastest, but the best.

Eight seconds is when the girl turns to them. Grinning, hollering, hands up in the air. Reid watches as they catch up, slowing down to match the horse’s speed. The man tries to flip himself over, dragging on his back towards the federal agents. Reid can feel his heart and he wonders if it’s beating harder from the run or the thrill.

He’ll never admit it but he’s always wanted to be a cowboy. This girl has his other dream in her hands, wearing it as her favourite belt buckle.

Eight seconds later and she’s smiling down at the agents, still hollering some form of yeehaw! Reid grins, dragging his aching limbs forward to help Morgan flip the man onto his stomach and cuff him. The dragging discontinues and the horse knickers his anger that the trial is over.

Reid loosens the rope from the man’s feet, working the fray between his fingers. He moves to hand it to the cowgirl but she’s already snapping it from him and coiling it back up. She latches it back to her saddle, chest heaving with the excitement of it all.

“Bitch!” the man spits as Morgan hauls him to his feet.

The girl just smirks and tips her hat back. Reid can’t help but watch her pretty red lips as she says, “I’ll stick my foot so far up your ass, you’ll taste my good leather if you don’t shut your goddamn mouth.” Vulgarity has never sounded better off of anyone else’s tongue. She’s got the first sermon he’s ever wanted to listen to sitting on her lips and he wonders if this is why people believe in God. If pretty girls have always made men believe in things they shouldn’t.

Her drawl is thick, sticky, and unsweet. She’s got more threats bubbling up in her chest, sitting precariously close to her heart. She comfortable in sliding off her horse, landing softly in the dirt.

He won’t admit it, but he can’t ignore how round her ass is in those tight jeans.

She pats her horse, sliding her rough hands under its harnesses and it’s mane. Reid knows enough about horses to distinguish several muscle groups and bone structures from others. He feels out of his depth. He’s drowning being so close to a dream he can never have. He wonders if he should ask her to stay. Tell her there’s reports. Witness statements. Paperwork. Anything to get her to stay longer, to prolong the closeness to the dream. The closeness to her.

The horse gives a bleated scream as Morgan passes with the handcuffed man, both human males looking equally frightened of the animal. It settles into a role of domestication as the girl lets the horse throw its head into her shoulder begging for pats.

Spencer knows he supposed to follow Morgan, but he can’t move. She’s everything in that moment. And just as he gets the courage to thank her, thank her for stopping the burning, she meets his eyes and drops her jaw.

“Well as I live and breathe!” she shouts. It’s too rough for a squeal, more of a whistle of her words. “Spencer Reid, not even a day’s difference. How in the hell are you?”

Is he breathing? He doesn’t think he’s breathing. She knows him. She knows him. She knows him. And he has no idea who she is. He searches her beautiful face. Running over the ruby lips. Over the pink blushing cheeks. The glittered eyelids and the long eyelashes.

She’s so unfamiliar it hurts.

Morgan stops in his tracks. There’s blood in the water for the first time in ages. The last time these waters were chummed was a bartender who called him exactly once.

And it gets worse. Her face falls. Emily and JJ are rounding the corner. Everything in him sinks to the floor. Every details about himself becomes apparent. He’s gangly and uncoordinated. His hair’s too long and he’s got circles under his eyes darker than the grease stains on her horse. He’s so unperfected and this girl reminds him of the girls in high school he could never have.

He wonders for a moment if she’s from high school. She can’t be though, he thinks as he fights the bile in his throat. She’s younger than me.

“You know boy genius?” Morgan asks, handing the killer off to Emily. He’s strutting. Ever the first impressionist. The girl barely glances at him, still studying Reid with a crestfallen little smile perched on her perfect lips.

“Not really,” she settles on, getting a better grip on the reins she’s holding. Getting a better grip on herself. “We met once. In Vegas. I was 15 and I’ve done my growing up since.”

Reid still hasn’t moved. He’s not sure he can. His feet are putty from the run. Putty from her smile. Just ask for her name, he screams at himself, but he can’t. There’s no guarantees. There’s no ‘of courses’, only ‘what ifs’. The what ifs can consume you and he’s worried he’s going to let them.

Morgan extends his hand in the stretching pause. And she shakes it. All crimson lips and pearly teeth. “I’m Agent Derek Morgan. You obviously know, Dr. Reid.”

Her eyebrows raise for half a second. She’s surprised. And impressed. And Reid’s heart warms for no longer than she answers. “I’m Shawn, Shawn Healy.”

“Shawn? That’s an interesting—“

Everyone pauses at the sound of hoofbeats. Whips around to see another girl, a blonde in even more glitter, ride up on her own horse. Shawn swings back onto her horse and spurs him off, following the other girl. Spencer doesn’t see the flags they’re carrying until it’s too late. Until she’s already apologising for leaving. She’s late.

Spencer wonders if he’ll ever see her again. Black curls bouncing over her shoulders. Stained lips. Sun glinting off every inch of her.

In another eight seconds, she’s gone. Eight seconds to win his heart. Eight seconds to ride off with it.

He gives Penelope some condensed version of the story that she’s hooked on anyway. She’s leaned forward, elbows on knees, perched on every word that leaves his mouth like it’s from God himself. It’s comical, he thinks. Spencer’s never really been invested in anyone else’s drama, not for longer than five minutes.

Penelope’s going to be invested, heels sunk in, holding on for dear life. She’s invested for life.

“So, how’d you get her back?” she asks. Starry eyed. Concerned. This is her white whale and she’ll go down with this ship. “She could’ve been anywhere! How’d you two get together?”

And he knows this part isn’t complicated. And it’ll be enough to tide her over.

The quick answer is that he googled her. Read every newspaper article, column, and paper mentioning her. Shawna Healy had been mentioned more times for winning rodeo competitions than he had papers published. She was accomplished in her culture, in her part of the world. She’d won up to regionals while in college. Even boasted to being the first girl on the UT Dallas Rodeo Team. Currently employed at Montgomery’s Cattle Ranch just outside of DC. The same ranch who was hosting a For-Charity Bull-riding Competition.

Spencer hadn’t known what to do with the information so he sat on it. For a month. Until he couldn’t wait any longer. The competition was that weekend. He had to go.

He just kept repeating to himself, this is for academic purposes. This isn’t stalking. You might not even see her. This is for—

And he stops thinking. There’s no reason to think anything other than: I’m sorely underdressed. He’s sinking to the bottom of the deep end of the pool, lead weights tied to his ankles. Every man, woman, and child here is nothing sort of their earned Country label. There’s boots and buckles and ball caps. There’s dust and dip and drawl.

And he’s in a cardigan. Why was that a good idea? He doesn’t know, but he’s tempted to shrug it off and disappear. To run right back out of gates. To get swallowed by everyone staring at him. Gawking at him. He’s back in high school again and he wants to drink bleach.

He’s almost to the bleachers, past the makeshift bar, just at the corner of the dirt arena. Spencer knows he should just go home, shake it off, and dissolve into wishing the world takes pity on him. He’s too out of his depth. These other people belong. He most definitely does not.

And just as he’s about to turn tail, pussyfoot out of every bit of confidence he’s ever had, when he sees her.

She’s on a different horse. One not quite as beastly as the other. This one’s mellow, waiting on the edge of the arena, while she’s chatting absently with another man on horseback. She looks different. She’s far, but there’s no glitter. No outstanding colours. No glinting under the fluorescents. She’s in a cowboy hat, tipped forward over her loose braids. She’s traded her button down for a flannel, rolled up to the elbows and he finally understands why Penelope said it was such a turn on.

There’s no words as the announcer suddenly comes on and a bull bursts from the chute. It’s one of the most terrifying things he’s ever seen. A tiny man holding onto a two ton absolute beast with one hand—it’s absurd! But he can’t stop watching. Can’t stop being impressed. Waits on bated breath for the man to get bucked off after his nearly eight second run.

He does and Spencer has had falls like that. They aren’t pleasant.

The bull bucks and kicks for another few seconds. Shawn and her friend lazily canter forward, guiding the animal back to the other side of the arena and through a gate. She whistles and the gate closes behind it.

The pair retreat back to their corner and the process starts all over again.

“You look a little lost, honey,” a sweet voice chirps beside him. He startles, head caught up in Shawn and every single perfect What If. This girl reminds him of a movie star he can’t remember the name of. Big blonde curls. Big eyelashes. Big smile. Tiny waist.

She’s amazingly beautiful. Amazing doll like. Amazingly…not his type.

Spencer still nervously smiles and clears his throat. “I kind of am.”

“Cardigan gave it away,” she giggles, turning him towards the edge of the stadium seating, dropping them onto the bottom row seat. “I’m Kaley Montgomery. My brother and my sister are this shift’s pick up riders.” Spencer nods along like he knows what she’s saying. “I tell ‘em I’m here to support them and my daddy—he put this whole thing on you know—but I’m just here to pick up cute cowboys.”

“I’m not a cowboy,” Spencer blurts. Her laugh is slick like the sugar in a Venus fly trap. He tries not to get drawn in, but she’s all encompassing. Bright perfume. Colourful clothes. Soft skin and warm empathy. There’s nothing uninviting about her and he wants to move back.

“No, honey, you aren’t.” Kaley pauses to look him over. Whatever she sees makes her softly grin. “Why are you here anyway?”

There’s no judgement. She’s safe and alluring and exactly the opposite of what makes him nervous at that moment. The confidence surges for a moment and he answers, “I’m actually trying to find this girl I met a while ago.”

“Must be a special lady. What’s her name?”

“Shawn Healy,” Spencer sighs. It’s wistful. It’s longing. It’s half desperate. It’s been a month since he’s seen her. A month since he snuck back to see if he could catch her at the rodeo one more tine.

Kaley snorts. Her lady-like instincts kick back in and she covers it was a giggle. “Honey, you met the right girl. Shawn’s like my sister. Her shift ends in a few rounds, and she’s meeting me here if you just wanna stick around for a second.”

And he does. Kaley keeps him laughing, has him singing the high praises of Rodeo sports by the end. It’s maybe another ten minutes. Ten minutes of calming down, easing into the world. Kaley looks like she has whiplash with all of the questions he’s asking. And she’s a little dazed when he blinks at her sheepishly.

“Told he was smart, didn’t I?” a voice says behind him and Spencer jumps out of his skin. He’s desperate to slip it back on without seeming desperate. Without seeming nervous. But it all melts. Shawn’s in front of him. Shawn’s grinning. Shawn’s even more beautiful without the glitter.

“How did you recognise me?” he blurts. There’s stumbling as he tries to backtrack. Shawn’s eyes are green this close up and she smells like leather and oats and apples. His sentences lose traction as she peels her hat off, and sits down next to him.

There’s nothing soft about her. She’s callused. Rough. Nothing like any other girl he’s ever had the pleasure of meeting. Spencer doesn’t need more than ten seconds to know that Shawn’s never worn glitter more than the one time and never will again. To known that Shawn is simple and complicated and every grey area he’s ever wanted to explore.

Shawn’s eyes are still and focused. She follows Kaley as the girl stands and leaves. Returns the gaze to Spencer with a glint he can’t categorise. There’s a pause. Lead up to another eight seconds of life changing to be done.

“You were sitting by yourself at a sorting event at the South Point,” she breathes, brushing a piece of dirt off the hat in her hands. Setting it beside her on the bleacher. She gives him plenty of time to stare. To appreciate her.

There’s plenty of time, Spencer thinks and he keeps her gaze with a nervous grin.

Shawn brushes a hand over the frazzled bits of her hat hair. “I came and sat next to you because you looked so lonely. You were so afraid.”

His brain fires and spits and roars to life. He can remember the strange girl who came to sit by him, a sea of empty spaces around him. He’d just committed his mom. Was just about to leave for MIT. He’d been swimming in a sea of self-hatred when he’d been greeted by braces and pimples and too much dark hair. She’d explained every second of the calf sort, almost unprompted, and sussed out every single one of his questions.

It had been as close as he ever dared get to being a cowboy. A decade later and she was every introduction to this world he’d ever had.

Shawn’s got two seconds left on the clock and she doesn’t disappoint. Her fingers are delicate as she places a precarious hand on his knee. There’s a soft pressure to his patella. Shawn’s touching him and he can’t help the shock.

“I had one of those day long crushes. You were the smartest man I’d ever met.”

And no words are suddenly good enough. He wants to tell her that he’s fallen in love now. That he can’t help it. That all he wants is to listen to her drawl on for the rest of his life. That she’d made that last week in Vegas bearable. That she’d been everything. Still was.

But there’s no good way to articulate that. And maybe she knows that. Maybe Shawn Healy was a profiler in a different life because she lets go of his knee and switches subjects. Leans back against the seat behind her, stretching out into the spot of sun.

“It’s my lunch break,” she announces, her boots drifting closer to touching his chucks. The eyes don’t matter as the bleachers stare. What matters is Shawn’s tricky smile. “Have lunch with me.”

He nods and doesn’t think he could bear to disagree with her. Shawn disappears for a moment long enough that he’s worried she isn’t coming back, but she plops french fries into his lap not a second later than the worry begins to fester. Shawn’s not one to back out of commitments, he learns, and ends up hearing enough bad stories that Spencer isn’t sure how they’re getting along so well.

Because they’re getting along so well. Too well. Like they’ve never stopped talking since she was 15 and he was 18. Three hours is too early to say I love you, but he’s thinking it as she talks through a basket of french fries. As she sneaks them to some tiny kids in even tinier cowboy boots.

He’s thinking it every time she laughs.

He’s thinking it as she shoves his shoulder and demands to know why he doesn’t own a pair of jeans.

He’s thinking it even as she stands and apologises and stuffs her business card in his shirt pocket. “We’ll get you cowboy’d up one of these days, Dr. Reid. Now, don’t you forget to call—I’m late again.”

She runs off and he can’t stop thinking I love you so much as she waves at him over her shoulder and once again when she’s in the arena, back on a new horse.

Penelope is near tears at the end of Spencer’s story. He relaxes into the new world he’s entering. The one, two years later, where he’s wondering exactly how much he can keep to himself. How much Garcia will suss out and how much he’ll tell her himself.

Penelope folds her arms and suddenly frowns. She’s got a bee in her bonnet and Spencer’s afraid of what it means.

“Shawn,” she murmurs to herself. “Spencer Reid is shacking up with a cowgirl. I can’t—I’ll see it when I believe it.”

This is her attempt to get Spencer to show her pictures, or call Shawn, or even bring her around. But he doesn’t. He just smirks. No matter how much he actually can’t work the phone in his hands, he doesn’t want to. Shawn’s worried enough about meeting the team, she doesn’t need one Penelope Garcia tracking her down and tackling her.

“How ever much I love this chat we’re having, I have to get back to work,” Spencer announces. He stands. Walks off before Penelope can ask more questions.

And despite all of her yelling and protests and shouting for him to just come back here and tell me if she’s your girlfriend, Penelope knows she won’t get anything more. She’s determined anyway, and plans to corner JJ later on.

She finds doesn’t have to ask JJ, cornered or not. Because not four hours later, does Penelope find one Dr. Spencer Reid admiring the diamonds on the wedding ring he’s holding up between him and the coffee pot. He’s quick to shove it in his pocket as Penelope enters the little kitchenette. Quick to stir sugar in his coffee like nothing’s happened. Like Penelope definitely didn’t see the ring he’s waiting to give Shawn.

“When did you get the ring?” she asks, quietly opening the box of tea.

“Promise not to think I’m crazy?”

Penelope nods, turning just enough to see just how love stricken the poor boy is. “I’d even pinky promise, my love.”

He smirks and softens and says almost so quietly she doesn’t hear, “It was about two weeks after our first date. It took about eight seconds to find the right one.”

#pls I'm doing my best #i've also got anxiety to the moon and back #spencer reid #oc #criminal minds #dr spencer reid

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pernicious-pastas · 4 years ago

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Villain, Chapter Two

Pairings - Masky/Tim x You

Word count - 1260 words

Chapter Summary - Tim, Brian, and Y/n walk through the forest to get back to their shared cabin used after missions. Y/n and Brian chit-chat before a more serious conversation after a few rounds of adult juice. (Alternate Title: Was Tim listening to the convo in the woods?)

Warnings for chapter - Language, drinking, mutual conflict between Tim and y/n.

Notes - Pastas mentioned are Toby, Sally, clockwork (Natalie), and Jaime! Jaime is an oc of mine which you can look at here: XXX. Please note the y/n is over 21 and can legally drink. Also i’m working on starting an AO3, so look out for that linked in the next chapter :D

Previous Chapter: XXX

___

Calling the walk back through the woods a “terrible fucking idea” would be an understatement. Never understanding why those two hard-asses didn’t just steal a car or two will always be in the forefront of your mind when finishing a mission. But hey, at least you had Brian to keep you occupied during your walks.

“Can’t we just make a portal to the cabin and call it a day?” You groaned, shuddering against the freezing wind that danced around you. Brian’s footsteps walked next to yours in the almost frozen ground around you. “Unfortunately for us, we lost the ability to make portals when Jeffery started making portals from his bedroom to the communal kitchen,” he said, his voice was gruff and clear when not muffed by his voice changer. You chuckled a bit before your expression soured, remembering what Jeff’s actions cost your tiring legs. Brian noticed your slight change in demeanor and decided to change the topic to distract your mind. “Hey, I’m sure we’re close. And I've been meaning to talk to you about something, Well two things.”

Your face puzzled before you gave him a reassuring look, letting him go on. He turned back to look at Tim to gauge if he'd be able to hear the conversation in question, after a few seconds Brian turned to you again, lowering his voice. “Do you ever wish you never accepted Slender’s offer? Like, do you ever wonder what would’ve happened if you said no, or if you never got wrapped up in this in the first place?” You paused and thought for a second before giving him your answer, you never really thought about that before.

“Honestly? I’d probably still be stuck in my hometown. I think I’m glad I took this job in a way. Although the cons definitely outweigh the pros most of the time.” You chuckled, thinking back on your home life before stopping yourself, knowing the pain it would bring you. Your life before becoming a proxy wasn’t all that glamorous, but thinking about the people you left behind and what you could've been always left an indecent taste in your mouth.

“Cons?” Brian quizzed, hoping for an elaboration. You sighed and watched the breath turn into fog in front of you. “Well y’know, if I knew I would have interacted with some unsavory people I don’t think I’d take the job.” You joked. Hopefully, Tim didn’t hear that. You sunk into your jacket, hoping to bring a little more warmth to you. “Speaking about a certain unsavory coworker of ours,” You turned to peak at Tim for a final time before continuing. It looks like he wasn’t paying attention and was too far behind to even hear anyway, so you let yourself go on. “Has Tim always been this mean to previous co-workers? Like, that Toby guy that’s been on that year’s long mission, was Tim a dick to him?” You sighed, you didn’t know why this bothered you, But the tension continues to fuck with you nonetheless.

Brian stops for a quick rest, and you follow suit. “I guess he's always been kinda brash to people he doesn’t know, but never this bad and for this long.” He said. Your thoughts filled up the silence that had settled between you two. You’ve been here for, what? Almost three years and Tim still couldn’t get a grasp on the fact that he had to work with you. You huffed in annoyance. Brian watched you and decided to speak up again. “Why does it even bother you if you hate him the exact same?” You spit on the forest ground and glared at Tim, even though he probably couldn’t hear a damn thing you said. “It doesn’t.”

*time skip to the later in the cabin*

“Brian… We’re friends, right?” You asked, a drunken tint flushed your cheeks as you spoke. The scenery was nice, two pals sharing drinks around a lit fire. The sun was long gone by now, the fire contrasted the harsh night air as it enveloped you in warmth- Something you could get behind in your hazy state.

He thought for a moment before taking a swig from his bottle and turning to face you. “I’d think so, We’d practically have to be if we’re working in this type of occupation. The more people to keep you sane, the better.” You nodded your head while he continued. “This kinda loops back to what I wanted to talk to you about a couple of hours ago. Well, before we started talking about Tim.” He said, you thought back about your previous conversations and eventually pinpointed it to the walk in the woods. “About our pasts and junk?” You asked. He kicked off the dirt from his boot into the blasting fire. “Yeah, I’ve been thinking about it a lot actually, I’ve been so focused on being the Always-in-Line, harsh, perfect proxy that I’ve almost forgotten myself.” You slowly nodded your head. Hey, you kind of felt the same in a sense. You cringed thinking back to your previous memories.

“I don’t know Brian, the Boss always enforces that we push away the past and focus on our new responsibility at hand,” You paused. “Still, I get it. The tapes bothering you again?” He nodded before you heard a loud whack of a door slamming into the cabin’s exterior walls. You slowly shifted your eyes to the cause of the noise, and they settled on Tim. You shifted in your chair in fake-annoyance. Too drunk to care if he was with you two or not. “The past is the past, Hoodie. Get over it.” Tim scowled at the two of you before lighting a cigarette. Tim walked over to the burning fire and crouched, He sucked in while he studied the flames, His eyes almost matched the fires bellowing rage before he closes them, blowing out his smoke into the already roaring fire. What a fucking weirdo, you thought.

“Evening, Masky.” Brian said. his boot still on the fireplace’s edge, almost directly across Tim’s face. Tim got up and took another drag and turned to you. “Now I’ve been wondering Y/n, how far you would go with a little booze in you.” Tim condescended, a smirk on his face and he eyed you. You rolled your eyes and got up, “Enough of the bullshit, Tim. You wanna be an asshole? Fine by me. I’m done with whatever game you’ve been trying to make me play.” You stormed into the house, your outburst leaving both the men in silence.

As you less-than-gracefully wobbled to your dark room. You undressed and changed into comfy clothing before retreating under your covers. Memories hung up on the walls around you. Pictures of you and your killer friends smiled down at you, the handmade bracelets Sally had gifted you sat on your nightstand. Dirty band tees Natalie and Jaime had once fondly given you on your previous birthday laid on the floor, ready to be washed and worn again. Small trinkets of your favorite interests decorated the room. Traces of you and your life swirled around your cold room, you thought about the previous conversation you had with Brian. Maybe it was the booze, or maybe Tim decided to finally crank up the heat, but you felt warm inside when thought about the people you met through this hellish job. Forgetting about all the anger you have for certain coworkers of yours, you sunk further into bed.

You grinned to yourself in the dark and shut your eyes, ready for bed. “I’d never regret accepting Slender’s offer.” You whispered slowly, letting yourself succumb to the night’s rest that eagerly awaited you.

___

likes, comments, and reblogs appreciated !! feedback through the ask box welcomed (won’t give out future chapter info though hehe)

#masky x reader #masky x you #tim wright x reader #creepypasta fanfiction #tim wright x you

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aros001 · 3 years ago

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First time read through light novel vol. 6. Random thoughts.

Hey, can you guess what my favorite episode of the anime is? Here's a hint: it's one apparently a lot of other Subarem shippers hate. I say f**k that! Episode 18 and this book made me love the idea of them as a couple even more! But we'll get to that in a minute.

“By conducting these negotiations, you bear Emilia’s fate on your shoulders. Naturally, everything you say affects her, and it carries the same weight as Emilia’s words. This is not a decision you should make lightly, nor are the words you say easily taken back.”

“...Ah, uh...”

“Moreover, I ask again—should you owe me in this matter, it will mean the defeat of the Emilia camp. Are you truly fine with this?”

It really brings into the focus the problem of Subaru calling himself Emilia's knight without thinking and why the actual knights took such offence to it. At best it was a gimmick with no actual meaning to him and at worst he wanted all the rewards that came with being a knight (or at least what he perceived as the rewards) and not any of the responsibility. That's basically the reality Crusch is making Subaru face; the true burden that is on the one who claims to be Emilia's representative. Being a knight isn't just a game or a fancy title. Whatever he does will heavily impact his lady's future and he never once considered that.

“You hate the Witch Cult. That’s the reason you approached Emilia, is it not?”

Damn.

“—You have not said, ‘I want to save Emilia,’ even once.”

Daaaamn. Obviously, we know the witch cult has nothing to do with why Subaru wanted to hang around Emilia, but it's really telling of his current state that that's what it looks like from the outside. His hatred for Petelgeuse is stronger than his love for Emilia.

The fact that Roswaal has twice now been absent during events that his presence could easily have prevented tragedy is incredibly suspicious. Especially during the mansion arc, where he only left the mansion during the loop Subaru had made a lot of progress in finding the shaman and thus, unlike the previous loops, could have warned him about what was about to happen. It feels like Roswaal is intentionally removing himself as to invite disaster upon his house and Emilia, likely to manipulate her and Subaru.

Priscilla is an oddity to me, because she really feels like someone I should dislike more than I do, as I tend to have an instant dislike for very bratty, entitled, and/or spoiled characters. I'm not sure what it is specifically that's lifting her up so much for me. It's not just the looks, because I've seen attractive female characters I've hated because of their brattiness (I think she and Bitch princess from Shield Hero share the same english voice actor, in fact). I think that, one, there is just this sense of fun and amusement when Priscilla's around, like I just want to see whatever she does next, and two, despite her attitude, I'm not really getting a feeling of shallowness from her. She doesn't feel like she's putting people down just to prop herself up. There is actual strength and depth to her.

Rem followed behind both of them, and he could hear noises coming from her nose every so often. Rem had a keen sense of smell, and she’d apparently picked up some kind of unsavory scent, staring at the back of the iron helm as they walked along.

Well, Al is from another world like Subaru, so it wouldn't be surprising if he also had the witch's scent attached to him, assuming his situation is anything like Subaru's.

“Don’t be silly. You’re Ram, right?”

“I am Rem... Forgive my rudeness, but where have you met Sister, Master Al?”

Rem explained how he’d mistaken her for her nearly identical older sister as she posed the question. However, Al made no reply. He raised up his one arm and touched his helm, busily poking the metal.

“What the hell’s goin’ on here...?”

Al sounded nervous, seemingly unable to process the information. The increasingly rapid tapping offered further proof.

“So you’re Rem...and your sister is Ram?”

“Yes, that is correct.”

“This might be a weird thing to ask but...is your older sister alive?”

“...? I do not understand the meaning of your question. Sister is alive, as she should be.”

The instant Rem gave that answer, Subaru, who had been listening to the conversation in silence, felt goose bumps all over his flesh.

“—This ain’t funny.”

Well...that got a lot of theory wheels turning in my head. I was already wondering if Al had his own Return By Death ability, so it's certainly possible he'd met Ram before a restart, though why he'd mix up her and Rem, I'm not sure. Another possibility is that he's maybe experienced Subaru's own RBDs, so while he can't trigger the ability himself he retains his memories from the original timelines. We've seen timelines where Ram has died but also one back at the mansion where only Rem died. Of course, there's also the possibility this story is going to go full Futurama: Bender's Big Score and Al is going to turn out to be a future version of Subaru sent back to the past.

That damn whale is like something out of a horror movie. I don't tend to care for gory horror but I do like movies with unique monsters and killers, so I could easily see myself getting into a movie about a giant flying whale that appears in a dark fog and basically consumes the entire existence of whatever it eats, including its past presence in the world. It's not just memories being erased. The person themselves never was.

You can tell the story is doing a good job of connecting when I know full well that Subaru's going to have another RBD and that everything's going to be fine and I'm still tearing up over Rem basically sacrificing herself to hold off the whale and Subaru is realizing he's allowed her to die four times over.

Huge difference between the books and the anime, as I'm pretty sure in the anime Puck just killed Subaru in the room Emilia died in. There was no bringing her to the witch cult's hidden cave like there was here.

“Unable to even pass a single trial, not even facing a single Deadly Sin, bearing great expectations only to stumble over the first stone in her path...”

The madman looked down at the sleeping Emilia, sighing.

“—Ahh, you were lazy!”

Curious as to what he meant by all that. Now that I think about it, I don't think it's been revealed yet the specific reason the witch cult went after Emilia. Yes, she looks like the Witch of Envy but it that a bad thing or a good thing to the cult? Do these "trials" she was supposed to face have to do with the dragon and royal selection or the witch?

I don't think they said why Subaru can now see Petelgeuse's previously unseen hands. I think I saw a theory about how Subaru's connection with the witch grows stronger with each RBD, beyond just the scent, so he might simply has just accumulated enough EXP to finally level up into seeing them. Then again, I did love Subaru's mocking line to Petelgeuse that the witch has been "cheating" on him with Subaru, so it's certainly possible he just has more of Satella's affection than Petelgeuse and thus he gets more special perks from her.

And finally, we get to the talk between Subaru and Rem at the end. Funny thing, when I first started watching the anime, someone I knew who'd seen it before me told me that, one, it's very different from Isekai Quartet, which introduced me to the characters, so don't go in expecting a comedy, and two, that episode 18 has a Subaru moment that a lot of people hate. Given how the arc had been since before that episode and how Subaru kept falling further and further, I had no idea what was going to happen or what was worse than what he'd already done that'd get people to hate him so much.

And it turns out it's just because of a shipping war. I'm still not sure if I should feel relieved or annoyed. Yeah, I ship Subaru and Rem over Subaru and Emilia, but hating this part of the story just because he still loves Emilia? I feel like everything else except for that one line gets ignored (the line I'm avoiding saying because I don't want a bot to flag this post) and that the lack of all context except Subaru loving Emilia while Rem loves him destroys a lot of why the scene works.

There's just so much to talk about with why I love this part between Subaru and Rem. I'm a big fan of superhero stories and a classic trope I love is when things get dark and everything is brought to its lowest point...only for the hero to make a comeback. And Subaru... The man is broken. He's given up. Not only has he experienced death, failure, and futility multiple times, he's seen the people he cares about be completely slaughtered, with Rem dying, being mutilated, and even erased to protect him and Emilia, the woman he loves, dying directly because of him. He's powerless to change anything, or at least everything he does change seems to just make things worse. He sees himself as selfish, greedy, and arrogant; that he never actually cared about anyone other than himself. He's just spewing all this very justified self-hatred...and Rem counters it perfectly, not saying a single thing that isn't true about what she loves about him. Last volume had her imagining running away with Subaru, so the possible life with him she talks about isn't just something she's pulled out of the air. It's something she's considered and wants, which means it has actual weight when she turns him down.

I think another reason Rem connects to Subaru so much is because she's no stranger to self-hatred. She's also seen her own existence as a blight on everyone and everything around her. That she's selfish and terrible. And the person who helped pull her out of that state, at least somewhat, and get her to start liking herself was Subaru, which is what she's doing for him now. It's what I love so much about the relationship between these two. It's not just that they've saved each others' lives. They've helped each other in incredibly personal ways, despite the fact that neither fully knows what the source of the other's pain is. Subaru doesn't know what Rem felt as she watched Ram's horn get cut off. Rem doesn't know about Subaru's RBD and constant failures. They didn't need to. They simply knew the other needed help and they gave it, with no strings attached. It's why, despite me shipping them together, I'm not upset that Subaru doesn't return Rem's love (yet?) in the same way. There was a great bit of art I saw of the moment, and the words alongside it were "I didn't say I love you to hear it back. I said it so that you would know." Despite her still having some issues, being a little too subservient and obsessed with Subaru, I can believe Rem's love for him is real. When Subaru hated himself and believed everyone else did too, Rem told him that she loved him, not to get anything back out of it, but simply because she wanted him to at least have that to hold onto.

Rem was clearly at least a little upset at the end of their talk, and I can see it being some regret that she turned him down or that he does still love Emilia more, and I'm fine with that. She did the right thing and she is happy the real Subaru is back, but her being a little sad afterwards keeps her human (even if she's a demon).

Honestly, while I do ship them, I think both did make the right call. If or when they hook up, it should be when there's no lingering doubts or regrets they're carrying with them. Where they can have a future where they can smile together and with everyone in their lives they love and can't just abandon. Plus, I want to see Ram as an aunt to Subaru and Rem's kid! That sounds amazing!

And Subaru saying he loves Emilia, even after Rem poured her heart out to him...well, yeah, of course he does. He just found out Rem loves him and has had no time to process it (he was trying to run away with her out of fear and guilt, thus why she turned him down). If his feelings for Emilia were that easily swayed then it'd be hard to say that they were ever that strong or real to begin with, and thus what would have been the point of everything he's been through? It's not like he said it to hurt Rem. Hell, here and in the anime he sounds pretty apologetic as he says it, because he knows it'll hurt her to hear it and he doesn't want that. But it is the truth. So I'm not going to get mad at him for it. It's consistent with his character and everything he's been through and lead to great character moments for both him and Rem. What's there to be angry about?

But yeah, there was a little bit of it in the last chapter but I'm soooooooo looking forward to next volume. I remember just the feeling of hype and "F**k yeah!" going through my chest on my first watch of the anime. Subaru, after hitting his absolute lowest point, pulling himself together with Rem's help and gathering up everything he's got to fight back against the previously hopeless situation and save the day. It made all that heartache and misery so worth the wait.

Original Reddit post: https://www.reddit.com/r/Re_Zero/comments/gr9y77/novels_first_time_read_through_light_novel_vol_6/

#re:zero #random thoughts #reddit repost

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welllpthisishappening · 4 years ago

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Self-Promo Sunday [Monday] Tag Game

Just for fun this Sunday [Monday], let's talk about our personal favorites of our own fics.

Not the ones we necessarily think are the “best.” The ones we go back and reread again and again (because if you don’t reread your own fics what are you even doing?), or the ones we wrote for something or someone special, or the ones that were most difficult to write and just make us proud when we think about them? Whatever criteria you choose, just talk a bit about the fics of yours that you really like.

I was tagged by @shireness-says who really is fantastic and, like, I am not above some shameless self promotion. Plus, it’s a good procrastination technique.

————

All Was Golden in the Sky Magic is dying.

Emma knows it. She can feel it, the emptiness rattling around in her, like it’s trying to make sure she disappears as well. What she doesn’t know is what to do about it, because, suddenly, there is a man in Storybrooke claiming she’s the Savior and a seeress certain a prophecy promises the same and the last thing she expects is for her minimal amount of lingering power to pull her away.To New York City.

And another oddly familiar man with blue eyes and a smile that sinks under her skin and makes magic bloom in the air around her. Things are about to get interesting.

— Listen, this may very well end up being one of my most favorite things I have ever written. Is it ridiculous? You betcha. But am I ridiculously proud of the way I used as much canon as absolutely possible to create something slightly different and a little more magical? You betcha, part two. I legit think it’s one of the more creative things I’ve done and dare I say more romantic? There’s lots of swooning in this one, guys. Killian knew who she was even through magic! The magic brought them back together! Also, Will Scarlet says the words “That’s love, dick!” at one point, which I really think should make more people like it. (I loved this story so much I wrote 50K about Killian and Ariel traipsing around the Enchanted Forest on like a weird, magical road trip, like, just for fun.)

The Period of the Long Change It’s quick. One second she’s standing there and everything is fine and then Emma looks up and it’s not. It’s awful. And the lights are too bright and there are too many rooms and too many opinions and her phone won’t stop ringing because everything seems to be changing all at once. She’s never been great at coping with change. But, maybe, if she can just figure it out and stay right where she is, with Killian Jones, captain of the New York Rangers, at her side, it’ll be alright.

It’s slow. One second he’s standing there and everything is fine and then Killian’s breath catches and it’s not. It’s terrifying. And the noises are too loud and there are too many questions and he can’t find the right answers to any of them, not sure how to cope with everything changing all at once. That’s never really been his forte. But, maybe, if he can just figure it out and stay right where he is, with Emma Swan, director of New York Rangers community relations, at his side, it’ll be alright.

It’s another season and another challenge and Emma and Killian are both struggling to get over the boards.

— Ok, ok, ok, I know what you’re going to say. Laura, nothing about Blue Line is overlooked. You’re constantly yelling about people still reading Blue Line. And yes, that is true, but also...people were not into this one. Like, at all. They were occasionally mean about it! I cannot tell you how many “This would never happen” comments I got, and people were VERY upset by how often Killian was told he was an idiot. He was, though, so. But again! There’s some real swoon-worthy moments in here, if I do say so myself. In the middle of press conferences, even! The blowup chapter nearly made me cry while I was writing it! They sneak out of Casino Night! Also, the end was an idea I’d had building for a long time and it was nice to write it.

Nights Were Mainly Made for Saying It's possible. Emma is certain. She's going to fix this. She's going to save him. By time traveling. Which is totally, absolutely possible.

She's read about it. There's a theory.

So, no one has ever actually done it yet, but that doesn't mean she can't or they can't try and she just needs a little help. From Killian Jones. And his magic.

— In my limited fic-writing experience, I’ve come to realize modern magical AU’s do not always...resonate. Which is not to say that I do not appreciate those of you who did enjoy this one. This one being a weird little time loop story that was mostly a product of “Immma write this mostly for me.” But there were Hamilton references! And Alex Turner opinions! True Love conquered all!

Wrap Around Your Dreams Emma Swan is not a very good witch. She’s emotional and prone to immediate reactions and neither one of those things are currently helping her when the body count in Storybrooke is on the rise.

And there’s far too much blood at each crime scene and far too much magic and Emma has no idea where to look next. So she does the almost human thing; she starts making a list. Of clues and ideas and the absolute desperate hope that the killer isn’t what she’s certain it absolutely has to be.

The last thing she expects is for the notebook to start writing back.

— To this day, I am fairly certain this whole story was written in some sort of thrown-out-back fever dream. I literally wrote this whole story in one day. And it is very unlike anything I’ve ever written before. It got a little dark in some places? There was a lot of blood. Murder played a prominent role? But, like, True Love again. I live in want of another fever dream in which I write the sequel to this. Please read it. This one, not the non-existent sequel.

One Foot In The facts were these.

Killian Jones was dead. This much Emma knew, standing in the middle of the funeral parlor staring at him. What she didn’t know was why. Or how. Or what she would do when she touched him.

Because Emma Swan had a gift. Touch a dead thing once, bring it back to life. Touch it again, dead forever.

And the last thing Emma could do was bring Killian back to life, talk to him for the first time in years, only to watch him die all over again. Not when she’d spent the better part of those same years being in love with him.

------

Or: the Pushing Daisies AU that some people did ask for.

— Oh boy. So, this one languished in my docs for so long that I’m fairly certain people on the internet thought I was lying about having written it. Pushing Daisies is my favorite show in the history of the world, and combining it with Once was a labor of love that also required kind of a new plot and way more magic than the show ever had. Back at it again with murder playing a real prominent role, which is maybe why people were like, nah, about it. If I may be so bold, though, I think it’s some of my best banter. Which is good, because I’m always just trying to do Bryan Fuller proud.

#laura rambles #as i post this i realize the task was: your favorite fics #which is...not totally the same as what i wrote #i stand by this list though #immma make you guys enjoy that stupid witch fic if it's the last thing i do #i say as non-menacingly as possible

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riversofmars · 4 years ago

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The penultimate chapter! Read on AO3 or below <3

Chapter 15: Treason

“This is a terrible idea…“ Missy mumbled to herself as she looked around anxiously. She didn’t like the Emperor’s idea of getting into the Citadel at all but it wasn’t like she had a choice. Every now and then, Amy poked her with her gun, prompting her to keep going.

“Just like we did back at the Academy.“ The Emperor didn’t care for her warning. They were halfway through the Cloisters now, the end was in sight.

“The bells are deafening…“ River commented as they made their advance through the dark and foggy passages. “And the Sliders are up in arms.“

“This place is creeping me out…“ Rory added but the Emperor paid little attention to their discomfort. He seemed to know what he was doing and soon enough, they reached the elevators, breathing a collective sigh of relief.

“Just stay close.“ The Emperor hummed when they stepped out of the elevator. “We’re in the heart of the Citadel now.“ He gestured for them to follow.

“Where are we going?“ Missy frowned looking around. “We should go to the Council, give them a chance to negotiate, give them a chance to surrender.“ This was not the way to the Council chambers at all.

“There is something else I’m going to do first…“ The Emperor retorted as they turned another corner and found themselves face to face with four guards.

“Who are you? What are you doing here?“ They reached for their guns but Clara’s raven was faster. The Quantum Shade materialised and shot straight through the first two as the Ponds shot down the others. Missy averted her eyes quickly, she couldn’t watch. That was when she realised where they were. The landing bay of the TARDISes, a long corridor, a TARDIS behind every door.

“What are you…“ She could just make a break for it, try and rush into a TARDIS and take off, run away, but where to? And what would be the point? She needed a plan. She could feel Clara’s eyes on her. She knew the Raven would get her before she would even make it to a door.

“Time for some fireworks.“ The Emperor smirked and looked around expectantly as Amy and Rory set down the backpacks they had been carrying and opened them to reveal explosives.

“You can’t!“ Missy exclaimed as the penny dropped.

“Watch me.“ The Emperor grinned as he gestured for the Ponds to go ahead. “You’re just too slow, Missy, aren’t you? It was never about Gallifrey, it’s about this.“

“Why would you do this?“ Missy wanted to rush after the Ponds but Clara grabbed her arm, holding her back.

“Because once all other means of time travel are destroyed, I will be the most powerful being in the universe. Surely you have realised by now that this was inevitable.“

“They are sentient beings! You can’t do this! Think of your own TARDIS! These are her people!“ Missy protested, hoping to make him see reason.

“I appreciate that but I can’t take the risk. When they aligned themselves with the Timelords, they sealed their fate.“ He retorted seemingly unfazed as Amy and Rory places explosives along the corridor.

“Please, reconsider. You don’t have to do this. The universe already bows to you, what’s the point of this needless destruction? The Council know of what you’ve done, of what you’re capable of, I know it, everyone does. You don’t have to prove yourself anymore. Please don’t do this. A timelord should never kill a TARDIS.“ Missy pleaded.

“I’m not just a Timelord, I’m the Emperor.“ The Emperor grinned.

“So you are. You already have everything. You don’t need to do this, please.“ Tears blurred Missy’s vision. This was too much. Surely, not even he could be capable of this.

“Perhaps the TARDISes would be more help to us than destroying them would be.“ River spoke up, much to everyone’s surprise and Missy looked to her hopefully. Maybe there was still a little bit left of the girl Madame Kovarian had tried to save.

“Don’t do this.“ Missy spoke firmly, pulling herself together. “There is no coming back from that.“

“And you think there is going back from what I’ve done to date?“ The Emperor laughed and Missy was surprised at how bitter a sound it was.

“Maybe… if you’re willing to try…“ She said softly. “These are your people, maybe they will welcome you back but not if you do this. That’s what you’ve wanted, isn’t it. To return to Gallifrey victorious and people turn to you? They won’t if you do this.“ Missy tried to reason.

“She’s trying to turn your head.“ Clara interjected and Amy agreed:

“Don’t listen to her.“

There was a moment of tense silence as the Emperor actually seemed to consider her words. Maybe he did have enough of all the fighting, the cruelty, the killing. Maybe all he wanted was to come home, the conquering hero. They would never know as an icy voice cut through the silence:

“A moment of weakness, how undignified.“ A hollow thud followed and the Emperor’s face fell. He coughed and spat out blood. He locked eyes with River as the realisation dawned on her face as well.

“NO!“ She shouted when the Emperor dropped to his knees and fall over onto all fours, a knife embedded in his back. She rushed to his side as the others looked on in shock.

“Sorry, that was perhaps a bit impulsive but we have a causality loop to close and this seemed as good a time as any.“ They all looked up to the end of the corridor. A blonde woman was strolling towards them, followed by heavily armed guards.

“Who are you?“ Missy stared at her in shock. She could sense that she was a Timelord, there was something incredibly familiar about her.

“I thought that was obvious, I always said you were slow, Missy.“ The blonde smirked tilting her head in amusement, she flipped a knife in her hand, identical to the one lodged in the Emperor’s back, as she came to a halt in front of them.

“What have you done?“ Clara pressed through gritted teeth and the raven on her shoulder gave a threatening squark.

“No…“ River breathed looking up to her husband’s killer in disbelief.

“Don’t worry, Sweetie, I will be just fine.“ The blonde smiled with surprising tenderness in her voice and River let out a sob of relief as the penny dropped.

“Was this really necessary?“ River lowered her husband to the floor who was starting to fizz with regenerative energy and stood.

“This had to happened.“ The Emperor smiled apologetically and pulled River into her arms. “Sorry, it’s… been a while for me.“

“Okay, this is a lot to process.“ Amy sighed and Missy was utterly dumbfounded. Just as she had thought she was getting somewhere, the Emperor had outdone her yet again.

“The palace is secure, Emperor.“ One of the guards, a young woman, announced.

“Great.“ The Emperor smiled and let go of River. She turned to the guards. “We’ll have to take my body to Earth, Sheffield, in 2019, things will unfold from there.“ She instructed them and there were nods all round. “This makes so much sense now, I couldn’t remember what it was… or how I died, I just remembered being on Gallifrey and then finding myself back on Earth having regenerated.“ The Emperor explained to the others as she watched the regeneration energy pouring out of her former self. “While you have been making your way in, I’ve taken control of the Council and Gallifrey already. Just one thing remains to be done.“ She gestured to the bombs the Ponds had placed.

“Don’t!“ Missy exclaimed finding her voice again at last. “They’re sentient beings, it’s genocide!“

“What’s one more genocide now?“ The Emperor chuckled. “This will cement my reign forever. There will be only one Timelord meddling with time from now on. The Timelord Victorious.“

——

“This way…“ The Doctor pulled Missy along as they ducked into an alcove to avoid a patrol of guards.

“There is a lot more guards than I thought there would be…“ Missy admitted as they waited for them to be gone.

“Hence the disguise.“ The Doctor replied though she hoped they wouldn’t get in a situation where she would have to put on the act again, considering how badly it had ended last time. “Yaz and her men won’t be stuck down there forever, if anyone can find a way out of there, it’s her. We have to get to the Council before she can sound the alarm.“

“Ryan! Get a move on, her Royal Highness is requesting assistance in Miss Oswald’s quarters.“ The Doctor recognised Graham’s voice down the corridor and she tensed up.

“But that’s where…“

“You said she can look after herself.“ Missy said softly grabbing hold of her hand to reassure her. “You said this was the way to do this.“ The Doctor took a deep breath and nodded.

“Let’s go.“

——

“I think it really would be best for everyone if you just let me leave.“ River took a couple of steps forward but the Emperor barred her way, keeping herself between her and the TARDIS door.

“I don’t think so. You’re just the bargaining chip I need.“ The Emperor grinned. This really was a very fortunate coincidence. The Doctor was strong willed and stubborn, just like she herself was of course, but she knew they also shared the same weakness in their love for their wives. “Do you want to do this the hard way?“ The Emperor asked when River kept walking.

“Certainly looks like it.“ River smirked in return as she took a swing at her. The Emperor ducked her punch and knocked herself into her to push her backwards. River jabbed into her side and the Emperor stumbled back. She pulled a knife from her belt and looked back at River to realise she had managed to grab one of them as well.

“I’ll have that, thanks.“ River smirked weighing the blade in her hand and the Emperor chuckled:

“You know, you could be quite fun to have around. Are you sure you’re overly attached to the Doctor? I’m sure my wife wouldn’t mind too much, could be a lot of fun.“

“Oh I don’t doubt that.“ River laughed. “But as a time traveller I can assure you I’ve been there and done that.“ She lunged forward, the Emperor moved back just enough, the knife missed her throat by an inch. She knocked River’s arm up, going for the side of her body but River was quick enough to twist out of her grip and evade being stabbed.

“I’m starting to like you.“ The Emperor smirked as she made sure to guard the door.

“What’s not to love about a blood thirsty assassin in your quarters. And I was trying so hard to avoid killing anyone.“ River hummed before flinging herself at her again. She grabbed hold of the Emperor’s wrists and knocked her backwards through the door. The momentum carried them through and they flipped over. The Emperor ended up on top, but River still held her wrists as she tried to push the knife into her chest. She managed to flip them around again and knocked the Emperor’s hand into the floor to make her drop the knife.

“Emperor!“ A voice sounded interrupting the fight. River looked up to find herself looking into several guns. The Emperor used her momentary distraction to throw her off. River caught herself and stood slowly, assessing the situation. Three guards stood in the doorway, the Emperor focused on the woman heading them up as she got to her feet as well.

“Exceptional timing, Captain.“ She said.

“What’s going on in here…“ Yaz asked slowly, keeping her gun on River who remained still. She knew how to pick her fights.

“Oh just… the Doctor’s wife dropping in for a visit.“ The Emperor looked back to River to make sure she was behaving and then back to Yaz. “What happened?“

“The Doctor is here. Her and Missy came in through the Cloisters.“ Yaz explained.

“Where are they now?“ The Emperor asked, her eyes widening in surprise. Somewhere in the distance the bells were tolling again. She had been right. The Doctor was about to become a big problem. She caught a little smile crossing River’s otherwise stoic expression at the mention of her wife with only served to antagonise her more.

“We’re looking for them.“ Yaz replied and the Emperor nodded:

“And quickly.“ She focused on River who was listening closely but her expression had turned emotionless. “Sorry we couldn’t continue this.“ The Emperor smirked and pushed her knife back into her belt.

“That certainly spoiled the fun.“ River dropped her knife accepting that this was not the right time to keep fighting. She knew when resistance was futile. She would get her chance later.

“Captain?“ A voice buzzed through the communications system and Yaz activated her communicator.

“What is it?“

“The Doctor has been spotted heading to the Council chamber.“ The voice explained.

“Well, I know where we’re going then.“ The Emperor smirked and glanced to River who’s expression remained unreadable. “Let’s see what your wife has been up to, I’m sure she’d be delighted to see you.“

——

When the Doctor and Missy burst into the Council chamber the generals stared at them in shock. There was a moment of stunned silence until a few of them started scrambling to their feet, muttering greetings.

“Emperor, I’m afraid there’s no news yet…“ An elderly man at the front started.

“Oh yeah right… uh…“ The Doctor realised the mistake immediately and looked to Missy for help, as did some of the generals.

“Missy?“ A younger man asked who sat a bit further back.

“What’s going on.“ A white haired woman questioned, frowning, confused.

“This is going to be difficult to explain, I’m pretty sure the Emperor kept this from you…“ The Doctor said slowly.

“Please, everyone, just listen.“ Missy took hold of the Doctor’s hand in support as she stepped forward to address the room. “I know we haven’t seen each other in a long time but I know you’re prisoners here as we all are, just because you’re here in the comfort of the palace doesn’t mean you’re any less trapped.“

“What is going on?“ The generals exchanged anxious glances.

“I’m not the Emperor.“ The Doctor said, feeling the need to clarify.

“What…“ The Council members stared back at her in shock.

“I’m not her. I’m the Doctor. I came here by accident, from a parallel universe to this one.“ The Doctor carried on when she realised they weren’t believing her. And why should they? It was a big stretch. They all got to their feet now, anxious, feeling like they needed to do something. “Wait wait wait, before you do anything, please hear me out.“ The Doctor pleaded.

“Your Highness, if this is some sort of test or perhaps a joke to…“ The older man from before tried his best to cut through the turmoil as the Cloister Bells rung far below, growing more insistent.

“It is not.“ The Doctor said firmly. “And I’m telling you this in the hope that you will not betray me, betray us.“ She looked to Missy who nodded encouragingly. “The Emperor is after me because she knows I’m going to try and help. Help all of you. Bring an end to this reign of terror.“

“You know me, we’ve grown up together. She’s telling the truth.“ Missy tried to appeal to them as the murmuring started up again.

“You can make a difference if you act now, I’ve got a plan but I’m going to need your help.“ The Doctor insisted. “Please say you will help us.“ She looked to Missy and then back to the group. “Let me help you.“

“Help with what exactly?“ The Doctor and Missy whirled around at the sound of the Emperor’s voice. “Not interrupting, am I?“ The Emperor grinned as she looked around the room at terrified faces as silence fell.

“River…“ The Doctor recognised her wife immediately and River gave her a smile of confirmation. The Doctor tried her best not to show her anxiety and worry for her wife’s wellbeing when she realised she was handcuffed and had two guns pointed at her at any given time.

“I would refrain from any sudden movements, Doctor, for your wife’s sake.“ The Emperor smirked as she walked further into the room. She looked around at the confused and terrified faces of her generals. They were struggling to follow and who could blame them? But that wouldn’t stop her.

“And you lot… why did no-one sound the alarm. I should think this qualifies as something I should be informed about.“ The Emperor was quick to anger and gestured for her guards to occupy the room as she stared down the generals.

“We thought she was you, your Highness.“ One of them spoke with a quivering voice and the Doctor balled her fists, she hated the way she was making them tremble. She could only imagine the things she had done to have this effect on them.

“You will not make that mistake again.“ The Emperor hissed. “What are you hoping to accomplish here, Doctor?“ She turned back to her doppelgänger. “And you, Missy, so you really were stupid enough to go along with her.“

“Anything to stop you.“ Missy shot back through gritted teeth. What was the point of making nice and pretending otherwise now? If this was going to be the end, she wanted to have a clear conscience and know that she had tried her best.

“Yeah?“ The Emperor’s expression turned to one of fury and she struck Missy across the face. Missy gasped and stumbled back, the Doctor caught and pulled her behind herself protectively. “And what have you been up to in the Cloisters? I hear you cost some good men their lives.“ The Emperor seethed.

“Their own fault for venturing too far to where humans shouldn’t be.“ The Doctor retorted. “So many humans everywhere, almost as if you don’t have the support of your own people.“ She squared her jaw.

“What do you think, Councillors, do I not have the support of my people?!“ The Emperor shouted, turning to the generals who were quick to nod and make their assurances.

“You’re meant to be the leaders of these people and you pander to a tyrant betraying the weak and vulnerable, it’s disgraceful.“ River shook her head looking around the room.

“No, it’s smart.“ The Emperor shot back.

“The Timelords are just the last civilisation to be conquered. They’re not your people. They’re being occupied. By you and your bullies.“ The Doctor shook her head at the Emperor before turning to the Council: “What has she got on you to make you accomplices to this? Your families? You need to stand up to her. She can’t take all of you.“

“Well, this is nice, isn’t it, everyone is here already.“ They were interrupted by another arrival. River - the Emperor’s wife - strolled into the room. Graham and Ryan followed close behind her, Ryan was carrying Clara, unconscious and helpless, over his shoulder.

“What have you been up to?“ The Emperor asked bewildered at the scene in front of her. All of this was getting rather difficult to follow. Two Rivers, the Doctor and Missy amongst her generals, and Clara? How did all this figure together? The Doctor’s River had told her that her River was confronting Clara but she wasn’t sure what to make of this.

“Getting a confession from this traitor, as promised.“ The Emperor’s wife retorted just as Ryan unceremoniously dropped Clara onto the floor. The Doctor and Missy exchanged anxious glances, the Doctor’s wife maintained her stoic expression. She had, after all, seen to this happening in some way. The other River carried on: “As suspected, she was working with the Doctor. Perhaps it’s time we all show our cards?“ She looked to her wife’s doppelgänger with amusement, like a lioness stalking its prey.

“Yes, why don’t we!“ The Emperor clapped her hands together. She did enjoy a good show and it would be just the thing to put the generals back in their place. “This should be educational for all of you!“ She looked around the room, regarding the Council with cruel delight. “Anybody got a glass of water?“ Everyone looked back at her confused. “Fine.“ The Emperor sighed. She knelt next to Clara and slapped her across her face to wake her up.

Clara groaned slowly regaining consciousness. The Doctor looked to her River who appeared unfazed and then to Missy who tried her best to hide her distress and discomfort. The Emperor struck Clara again for good measure, growing impatient while her wife looked on in amusement.

“What’s going on…“ Clara mumbled disoriented.

“Looks like you’ve had a little nap.“ The Emperor chuckled, endlessly entertained. Clara pushed herself up a little, anxious, feeling everyone’s eyes on her. She tried to compose herself but she couldn't stand up, her muscles wouldn’t cooperate yet.

“What happened?“ She looked around skittishly, her eyes flew from one River, the one that had quite obviously betrayed her, to the other that seemed to be having the time of her life.

“Slipped something in your drink.“ The Emperor’s wife answered happily.

“What…“ Fear took over Clara, she had been found out, how could she possibly get herself out of this situation? “What did you do?“ Clara looked to the Doctor’s River accusingly, she had to be the reason she had been found out. The Doctor looked to her wife as well, she wasn’t sure whether to be surprised or unsettled by how easily she had seemingly played Clara. She could only hope River had made the right decision.

“Don’t even try. The shade is gone, you’re helpless.“ The other River mocked as Clara was looking for a way out.

“What did you do?“ Clara spat in anger as she managed to stand at last.

“What I should have done a long time ago.“ The Emperor’s wife retorted. “When the shade realised how weak you were, it was easily persuaded to swap sides.“

“But I…“ Clara’s expression turned desperate, everything was crumbling around her. She had taken a risk and lost. How could she have been so stupid? She had allowed her jealousy to cloud her judgement and now it was too late.

“Time to come clean, Clara, I already know you were trying to have us killed so don’t even deny it. I just want you do give me a good reason as to why.“ The Emperor interrupted her. She had heard and seen enough. She had to put an end to this now before the damage could spread. The bells below were continually picking up speed, urging her on. She had to keep the people she could trust close and dispose of everyone else if she wanted to maintain her reign. She wasn’t naive, she knew Clara had always been an element of disunity among them but she had always been worth the trouble. Now, the tables had turned. The only plausible explanation was that this was all the Doctor’s doing.

“I just…“ Clara was at a loss. How did one explain years of feeling overlooked? Of feeling used and not seen? Of always playing second fiddle and never feeling like she had a place amongst them at all?

“Was it you, Doctor? Is this your doing? Did you turn her against me?“ The Emperor turned to the Doctor when Clara couldn’t manage an answer.

“No. You managed to do that all to yourself.“ The Doctor retorted calmly. “Clara approached us, not the other way around. What does that say about you?“ She knew she was on thin ice but this was what they had to work with.

“You’re lying.“ The Emperor hissed. “I’ve given her everything. Wealth, power…“

“Which was clearly not enough.“ The Doctor’s River interjected cooly. She felt for Clara, she really did, there was something incredibly sad about how things had turned out for her. To have love turn to jealousy, turn to obsession, turn to hatred… but she couldn't take back now what she had done. In the end these people seemed all as bad as each other and she had to keep her own goal in sights. She knew her wife probably wouldn’t see it quite like that but she knew how to be pragmatic when it was needed.

“Tell me they’re lying, Clara!“ The Emperor snapped, keeping her eyes firmly on the Doctor who shook her head slowly, sad to see how this was turning out.

“All I ever wanted was for you to notice me…“ Clara whispered, finding her voice at last. What was the point of lying now? It was all over anyway. The Emperor whipped around in disbelief. She had wanted the Doctor to be responsible.

“I knew it.“ The Emperor’s River shook her head, her voice laced with disgust and triumph in equal measured. The Emperor raised her hand for her to be quiet as she focused on Clara.

“Did I not give you everything?“ She growled as she stepped closer to her.

“We could have ruled together if you could just have…“ Tears sprung to Clara’s eyes as she pleaded for her to understand, to see her at last.

“We were ruling together.“ The Emperor growled into the tense silence. “And now you’re driving a wedge between us, you are making us weak!“ She raised her voice making Clara flinch. “Who am I supposed to trust now if even you betray me?!“ She turned back to look at the Doctor and spat: “Are you enjoying this, Doctor?“

“I’m despising every moment.“ The Doctor replied calmly.

“Tell me, Doctor, in all your wisdom, what am I meant to do?“ The Emperor laughed bitterly. “The only penalty for treason is death. I should kill her. Or should I spare her because she is my friend? But will I ever be able to trust her again? Knowing what she tried to do?“

“She wanted your attention, not your life, she…“ The Doctor tried to reason, taking pity on Clara, but the Emperor interrupted:

“She wanted power, we all do. It’s what’s making this world go round. There is only those who have power and those who don’t. The ones that rule and the ones that bow at our feet.“ She turned back to Clara and smacked her across the face with the back of her hand. Clara stumbled back and River shoved her forward again, knocking her down to her knees. “I gave her everything!“ The Emperor called out to the room, then turned back to Clara: “I have given YOU EVERYTHING! AND YOU DARE BETRAY ME?!“ She took a deep breath, composing herself. “This is your fault, Doctor.“ She glanced to the Doctor to make sure she was watching as she pulled a knife from her belt. “You prompted this. Everything was fine before you turned up. You offered to help her. Her death will be on you.“ She looked down to Clara who just shook her head to herself in disbelief. How could she have been so stupid?

“No, don’t!“ Missy exclaimed rushing forward before the Doctor could stop her. She pushed herself between the Emperor and Clara. “It’s my fault, I brought you together, it’s not her fault, she couldn’t help herself!“

“Missy, always the hero.“ The Emperor grimaced patronisingly.

“Believe me, this has always been my plan, I always knew it would end like this. I knew that Clara would fall for you, I knew the length to which she would go, and that you never would be able to give her what she wanted. It was fool proof, it was going to rip your inner circle apart, she couldn’t have…“ The words were spilling over Missy’s lips in a desperate attempt to make up for all the heartbreak and suffering her actions had caused. And in the end - and that was the worst part - it hadn’t even worked. It only meant more death and the Emperor remained unshakable and unfazed as ever. She would simply eliminate Clara and carry on.

“I underestimated you Missy, that is very insidious, very clever.“ The Emperor was genuinely impressed at the revelation. “But now it looks like your plan has failed, she’s outlived her usefulness and you try and save her? Plead for her life? You embarrass me.“

“Clara, I’m so sorry.“ Missy glanced to Clara who didn’t even look at her, she just laughed bitterly.

“Of course you are.“

“Yes, yes, we all are very sorry.“ The Emperor sighed and shoved Missy to the side. “Enough should have been enough for you, Clara. Your greed was your downfall.“

“And yours will be your hubris.“ Clara shot back defiantly, looking up to her at last.

“If so, you won’t be around to see it.“ The Emperor shrugged pressing her knife to her throat but before she could follow through, Clara dematerialised.

There was uproar.

“What just happened?!“ The Emperor shouted whipping around and her wife shouted to the guards to find out where Clara could have gone to. The Doctor let go the breath she was holding and Missy laughed in relief.

“Ah yeah, about that, that would have been me.“ River - the Doctor’s wife - raised her hand with mild amusement, the handcuffs dangling off it as she had undone them, demanding everyone’s attention. The Doctor looked to her wife and couldn’t help a grin, she knew she always had an ace up her sleeve, particularly when she had been responsible for what happened.

“What have you done?!“ The other River exclaimed.

“Sorry, sister, you didn’t think I was going to make it that easy for you, did you?“ River smirked looking into dumbfound faces. “Thanks again for letting me have a look around your quarters, really very helpful.“ She carried on and looked to her wife, meeting her eyes. The Doctor’s heart rates picked up when she realised River was several steps ahead of them. “Do come back for me, Sweetie.“ She winked at her and the Doctor couldn’t believe her eyes when she pulled her doppelgänger’s vortex manipulator from her cleavage. What better place to hide something valuable? She had been several steps ahead of them already. She threw it to the Doctor before anyone could react.

“Always do.“ The Doctor barely managed to reply but she knew better than to stall. She hit the green button and disappeared into thin air. River grinned and raised her hands as guns were being pointed at her.

“Where has she gone? Track her!“ The Emperor shouted.

“You can’t track a vortex manipulator, you can’t follow her.“ River informed her smugly.

“Where did she go?“ The Emperor went for River’s throat. She dug her nails into her skin but River didn't flinch, she just smirked.

“I have absolutely no idea but I bet it’s somewhere where she’s gonna do some damage to you.“ She answered growing a little breathless but maintaining her smugness.

“Monitor everything, if you detect the slightest irregularity in the time streams…“ The Emperor shoved River back and turned to face the Council again.

“Of course, Emperor.“ There was a chorus of agreement.

“And she would leave you? Just like that?“ The Emperor’s wife looked to the other River with no small measure of surprise.

“I’m a big girl, I can look after myself.“ River replied seemingly unbothered.

“Can you now.“ The Emperor spat. “Take her and Missy to the dungeon. Make sure everything is set for the celebrations, we will be using the arena.“

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megalony · 4 years ago

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She’s a good girl- Part 13

Here is the next part of my murderer! Ben Hardy series, I can’t believe how many parts I’ve got done so far and it’s not near finished yet. I hope you will all enjoy it and feedback is always lovely.

Taglist: @lunaticspoem @butlegendsneverdie @langdonzvoid @jennyggggrrr @rogmeddows @radiob-l-a-hblah @rogertaylorsbitontheside @chlobo6 @rogertaylors-lipgloss @sj-thefan @omgitsearly @luckytrashgooprebel @scarsout @deaky-with-a-c @killer-queen-ofrhye @bluutac @vousmemanqueez @jonesyaddiction @ambi-and-sunflowers @milanosaurus @httpfandxms @saint-hardy @7-seas-of-fat-bottomed-girls @mrsalwayswritex @rogerina-owns-me @peterquillzsblog @im-an-adult-ish @crazylittlethingg @allauraleigh

Series taglist: @onceuponadetectivedemigod @lelifesaver

Series masterlist

Summary: (Y/n) is a good girl from a church-going family and her brother, Joe is trying to put Ben behind bars. But when (Y/n) starts to fall for the dangerous killer, things get complicated.

Enjoy.

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"That's the fifth time it's rang in an hour." (Y/n)'s voice was groggy and on the verge of inaudible but she knew Ben had either heard what she said or already knew what she was thinking.

"Just ignore it."

A shiver ran down (Y/n)'s spine when Ben grumbled his response into the crook of her neck, a sure sign that he didn't care to answer the phone, he just wanted to go back to sleep. His arm that was looped around (Y/n)'s waist pulled her closer until her back was moulded to his chest and his face was buried in her neck.

(Y/n) had stayed in hospital for a week before being discharged but since that meant they were at twenty four weeks they were advised to play things safe. They had been home for five days now and Ben had put Mark in charge of the club so he could take time off to be with (Y/n) but he was now realising he had chosen the wrong person to be in charge. He didn't seem to be capable of going one day without ringing Ben up and asking about one thing or another or what he should do in a scenario. It wasn't as if Ben had given him that much to do whilst he was gone because Ben had brought the rota and the finance books home to sort them himself.

It had been strange but nice to have Ben at the hospital with her and then at home with her all day. (Y/n) was so used to Ben having an awkward work schedule, some days he went to the club for an hour, sometimes he was there all day or late into the night. And even though he still did some work whilst he had been home, it wasn't nearly as much as what it normally was.

But (Y/n) had a feeling Ben would be going into work today rather than having another week off like he planned. It wasn't often Ben actually took time off from the club because for one, he was the boss and had to oversee everything and two, he had a lot of business and backstreet dealings going on. The club worked more efficiently and properly when Ben was there and (Y/n) knew he was going to have to go back and get it running properly very soon.

(Y/n) wanted to bury her head in her pillow and block out the world when she heard her phone starting to ring for a change but she couldn't lay here and listen to the constant ringtones anymore. Reaching her hand out, (Y/n) grabbed her phone and tiredly opened her eyes before she leaned back into Ben and held the phone out to him.

"He's ringing me now, just answer it." The last five times Ben's own phone had rung he either ended the call or let it ring out until Mark gave up and ended the call himself. Ben wasn't supposed to be at work he was on time off and he couldn't be bothered to keep listening to Mark ranting and being unsure what to do.

Ben grunted as he lifted his head from (Y/n)'s neck, taking the phone from her in annoyance. It was one thing to repeatedly ring Ben, but then to go to the extent of ringing (Y/n) when he knew she was ill and off work was something else and Ben was not happy about it.

"What the fuck do you want?" Ben turned from laying on his side to laying on his back, staring at the ceiling when he just wanted to go back to sleep. It was only eight in the morning and Ben didn't often have time to lie in. Moving his free arm, Ben hooked his arm around (Y/n) and gently pulled her into his side until she slowly turned over so she was facing him.

With a sigh, (Y/n) laid her head on Ben's chest and leaned into his side as he started to feather his fingers up and down her waist. The slow movement of his hand contrasted to the anger she could feel radiating off of him and the way he was breathing harshly down the phone. Surely Mark knew ringing this much would only rile Ben up and if Ben did end up going to work (Y/n) knew as well as anyone else that he wouldn't be a happy man when he got to the club. There would be very little point dragging Ben into the club if he was in a bad mood because he would snap at anyone and everyone who annoyed him.

"Why the hell did I put you in charge when you can't understand simple instructions Mark? You're there so I don't have to be, do you get that? I'm supposed to be on leave and I don't want you calling (Y/n)'s number to get to me either. She's off sick so you don't call her for any reason and you certainly don't call her to try and get me on the phone, now fuck off."

Ben felt the urge to launch the phone at the wall when he hung up the call but it wasn't his phone and he knew smashing (Y/n)'s phone wasn't exactly going to make him feel any better.

He tossed the phone back onto the side table before he rubbed at his eyes for a few moments. He didn't appreciate Mark trying to ring (Y/n) to get through to Ben when Ben specifically told every worker at the club that (Y/n) was off work for the foreseeable future. Most of the guys there saw her as another boss there anyway, she knew what went on and what to do and Ben let her see a lot of the records and files no one else got to see. So he made sure they all knew she wasn't well and they couldn't ring her for anything to do with the club or him unless she came back to work in person.

"Are you going in?" (Y/n) tilted her head up so she could rest her chin on Ben's chest to look up at him but the look in his eyes wasn't a very pleased one.

"No, I'm on leave. What's the point of making Mark the manager if he doesn't do fuck all?"

"Ben, he's gonna keep calling until you go in and sort out whatever's wrong, the club doesn't run well without you. Go in I'll be fine, it's not like I'm going anywhere."

Ben tangled his fingers in his curls before he tilted his head towards (Y/n) and she watched his lips curve at the side into a sorry look. He didn't want to leave and she knew it but it wasn't as if she was in any immediate danger right now or the hospital wouldn't have sent her home. As long as (Y/n) didn't do any heavy lifting or strain herself and took it relatively easy then everything should be fine with no further issues.

"I think I'll have to, you sure you don't mind?" Ben knew deep down he couldn't leave the club for a few more days with Mark in charge because he clearly didn't know what he was doing. Leaving the club for a while was weird for Ben when he was there almost everyday and it felt good to have a break but he wasn't used to it. He liked being at the club almost everyday because it meant no changes could happen and nothing could go wrong without him knowing and trying to fix it. He liked being in charge and being in control.

"I'll be fine, I feel a lot better now. And technically... I could go back to work next week-" (Y/n) traced her finger over Ben's chest that sunk inwards beneath her touch as he took a deep breath and she knew what he was going to say.

"Don't start something you can't finish, doll. You know far too well that it would be too early to go back to work next week and you know full well I'm not letting you back either."

Ben pressed his lips longingly to (Y/n)'s forehead before he pulled out from under her so he could sit up and try to wake himself up. Going back next week would be far too early and they had already talked about this, Ben didn't want (Y/n) to go back for a few more weeks yet. It was better to play things safe than sorry and Ben was in charge of the club at the end of the day, he could just keep changing the rotas so (Y/n) would get frustrated and stop trying to go back into work.

"When can I go back then, boss? I'm six months along and I don't take maternity leave until I'm eight months, that's three months in between where I should be working." (Y/n) didn't want to push herself too much and she knew her limits, but she liked going to work.

Ever since Ben first gave her a job it felt like (Y/n) was finally grown up and she liked working at the club, it was different and made her feel important and it wasn't boring work which is what she wanted. (Y/n) knew when she went on maternity leave she'd be busy with the baby so working from home didn't seem like it would be an option and she would have been working for Ben less than a year before taking maternity leave. She didn't want to be stuck in the house getting bored, especially if Ben was going to be at the club working and she was just home alone.

"Baby... look, I know that you're gonna get restless and I know you want to go back to work but right now I'm not putting you on that rota for at least another two weeks. If you stress yourself out at work there will be problems we both know that. And when you come back to work you'll be stuck in the office most likely anyway."

"Ben..." (Y/n) whined his name pleadingly even though she knew it was near impossible to change his mind on most things.

Pushing herself to sit up, (Y/n) leaned over and wrapped her arms around his neck, resting her chin on his shoulder causing his head to turn in her direction with a smile. Ben's brows rose when (Y/n) started to feather kisses against his jaw and the top of his neck and he moved his hand to hold hers that were hanging around his neck. He knew she was creeping around him to try and make this work in her favour but he wasn't having it.

She could cling to him all she liked, his mind was made up. Stress would only make (Y/n) a lot worse and when she did come back to work she wouldn't be able to be running around the club doing everything like she did before. Ben would let her do the audits, the rota, the finance books, anything she wanted, but she would be in the office doing that rather than doing anything strenuous.

"What, you think I'll let you run around stocking up or tidying up or moving everything around? If you want to work you can do any of the audits and books you want and you can work from home whenever you want but you are not running around like you always do. Trust me, creeping around me like this won't change my mind, no matter how much I like it."

(Y/n) sighed but her lips curved up when Ben turned around in her arms and leaned over her until she had no choice but to lay back down with Ben hovering over her like the devil himself.

(Y/n) felt her chest starting to flutter and expand like it was filling with air when Ben pressed a rather desperate, bruising kiss to her lips before he started to trail his lips lower. He kissed the junction between her neck and jaw and pulled the skin lightly between his teeth causing an electrifying burning feeling before he moved his lips further down. (Y/n) watched his movements with wide eyes as he reached his hand up and hooked his finger around the collar of the shirt (Y/n) was wearing which he knew to be his own. He pulled the collar down to expose her sternum and the valley of her breasts before he continued kissing her newly exposed skin.

"I thought y-you were going to the club?" (Y/n) breathed heavily through her words and she knew Ben could feel her shivering under his touch.

"Not yet, I've gotta take care of my wife first." Ben murmured the words against her skin and (Y/n) could feel his lips curving into a smirk before he bit down on her skin causing her to gasp.

He wasn't going just yet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Can we talk?"

"Why are you here? You seemed rather determined to stay away from me these past few weeks." (Y/n) tightened her hand on the door handle like she was trying to find the courage to shut the door in Joe's face and put distance between them. But she knew she would never be able to do that, she couldn't shut him out like that no matter how badly she wanted to sometimes.

Part of (Y/n) wanted to hide behind the door to stop him scrutinising her and staring at her like he was but (Y/n) felt paralysed to the spot.

"Believe me, I shouldn't be talking to the wife of the murderer I'm trying to arrest... but she happens to be my sister and I need to talk to her."

(Y/n) debated shutting the door, she really did. For the longest second in her life, (Y/n) knew shutting the door would be easier. She knew that if she shut the door on him that would be it, she would be doing to him what he did to her a few weeks ago. He said he couldn't help her and (Y/n) didn't need any help, Ben wasn't a threat to her, he wasn't hurting her and he wasn't putting her in any danger so Joe didn't have to worry or try and get her out of this.

But (Y/n) couldn't shut Joe out, she never had and she never would be able to because he was her brother and he was the only family she had that she could tolerate. When the baby came along Ben and the baby would be the only family (Y/n) had, shutting Joe out somehow felt wrong when a family was all she had ever wanted.

(Y/n) could tell the moment Joe followed her into the living room that he didn't feel at all comfortable. He was walking into the house of a murderer, a man he had told himself every day that he was going to arrest and put behind bars for good. Joe felt like he was trespassing or breaking into someone's house, he felt like he shouldn't be here.

"What do you want to talk about?" (Y/n) brushed her fingers through her hair to push the tangled strands from her face before she slowly moved to sit down on the sofa. She pulled down the sleeves on Ben's dark maroon jumper and leaned back into the sofa, slouching down a bit. Her eyes followed Joe as he moved to it down on the chair, knowing a small amount of space needed to be added between them in case this chat didn't go the way they planned.

"Did he hurt you the other week? Please (Y/n), be honest with me if he did-"

"You watched him take me to the car and drive me to hospital, why would be be that worried if he had hurt me?" (Y/n) smoothed her hand over her stomach as she leaned her head on her free hand. If Ben really had punched or pushed or hurt her then he wouldn't have been so worried about her or concerned because Joe had to know by now that Ben didn't put on a show or fake emotions. He wouldn't have rushed (Y/n) to hospital if he had hurt her and been the cause of her pain.

"Can you blame me for thinking he did? Look, everyone who knows him knows the shit he gets up to but he's slippery, I can't get anything to stick on him even though we all know he did these crimes. If he has hurt you or you know what he's up to... tell me, come and make a statement at the station. You won't be in the wrong or in trouble for doing this."

A violent shiver ran down (Y/n)'s spine and she coiled back into the seat like Joe had threatened her himself.

He was here to try and persuade her to stab Ben in the back. He was trying to get her to go against her husband who she had married a month ago. How could he think she would be so heartless and cruel as to do that and condemn her marriage this soon after marrying Ben? Joe knew more than anyone that (Y/n) married him because she loved him, not out of any fear of Ben or fear for her safety or future. She loved him with everything she had despite who he was or what he did and nothing anyone said was going to make her go against him.

"You can't come running to me trying to get me to go against him like that just because you can't pin anything on him. It doesn't matter if everyone thinks he's done it, I'm not lying about him for you."

"It wouldn't be lying-"

"Joe, he's never hurt me or threatened me before and I don't know what he gets up to, I work at the club and all I see is the legitimate business, I know nothing of any crimes. I won't lie for you, I love him."

(Y/n) held her breath when Joe looked like he wanted to tear his hair out and start screaming. He was at the end of his rope because he was no closer to nailing Ben and it cut right through him that (Y/n) was now on Ben's side. She was in love with a murderer who Joe wanted to put in prison and he knew if he ever managed it, he would tear his baby sister's world into pieces. But he was willing to do that if it meant getting Ben and trying to keep his sister and her baby safe even if she didn't think she was in danger.

He seemed to take a deep breath before he sat on the edge of his seat and propped his arms on his knees. He wanted to put all of his thoughts into (Y/n)'s head and get her to see this from his point of view, but at the same time, he wasn't able to see things from her eyes either.

"(Y/n) it looked like he punched you that day, do you know how that frightened me? I didn't stop you marrying him and one week later he has to take you to the hospital. From the moment I let you walk out that door I've been terrified that I'm gonna get a call out to a domestic situation or the hospital or a body on the ground and I find out it's you. He may love you, he just may, but that doesn't mean he won't lash out and attack you or the baby and all I want is for you to be safe."

Joe saw Ben's record, he had it drilled into his head and he had to put half of those crimes into the system. He saw Ben beat up his most loyal workers until they were put into comas and sent to hospital, he saw Ben beat up men and leave them by the side of the road to be someone else's problem. Ben had no problems with who he hurt and all of his crimes suggest that a wife wouldn't curb his attitude or his frame of mind.

Being married to (Y/n) wasn't going to change Ben and Joe seriously thought that one day Ben was going to snap. He would be angry or worried about something and if (Y/n) said the wrong thing Ben could just blow up and attack her or even just frighten and threaten her and that was enough for Joe to want his sister out of this relationship. With a baby in the mix, it looked like a recipe for torment and abuse to Joe and he couldn't have that happening to (Y/n).

"Never once has Ben made me scared of him, he hasn't degraded me or hit me or been violent or even been angry in front of me and I think that counts more than your intuition that he might, one day, snap at me. He didn't punch me because he would never hurt me, I have a... pregnancy complication, he didn't do anything wrong he's taking care of me. I know you worry but I don't need you to try and ruin this because you're scared of him and I'm not."

"(Y/n) I'm not getting called out to a scene and finding my sister is dead because her brute of a husband thought it was his right to hurt her! You don't know what he's capable of!"

"Money laundering, blackmailing on a large scale, public brutality and GBH. He's broken a man's leg and sternum, he's shot someone in the kneecap, he's slashed a man from his elbow to his wrist vertically until he lost two pints of blood. I saw his file that day at the house, Joe and I looked through it. I knew who he was when I met him and I still married him and you know why? Because he loves me."

(Y/n) saw Ben's file that fateful day and it didn't ward her away from him when she first met him, if anything it drew her in because she didn't believe that charming yet cheeky man could be capable of what was in the file. Part of (Y/n) was still unsure how Ben could do what he did when he was so caring, loving and overall kind and generous to her. But she didn't care, (Y/n) overlooked it all because she loved him and he was the first and only person to show her what love was and who didn't try and put her down or mould her into who he wanted her to be. He influenced her but he didn't shape her or force her into a mould.

He was different and (Y/n) loved him for it.

"A man capable of all that tells you he loves you and you risk your whole faith and religion for him? Don't you see how many sins he puts on you for being with him? How can you be with a man like that and say that you still have faith in God?"

"I don't expect you to understand but I expect you to stop acting as if I'm the killer here. Ben offered me a cigarette when he met me, he didn't make fun of my dress or how childish mother made me look, he didn't question my faith or bring me down because of it. He gave me a car, he gave me a job I love, he taught me how to drive and he gave me a home and my freedom and he never asked for anything in return. He doesn't believe in marriage but he married me because he knew how much it meant to me and my faith. How many other people have been that kind to me in my life? How many others can say they love and appreciate me that much?"

If this conversation lasted much longer (Y/n) knew she was going to have to tell Joe to leave. She was starting to get a headache and he was stressing her out which wasn't a good idea right now. This was pointless anyway, she wasn't going against her husband and nothing Joe said was going to change that or make her agree to what he was asking which was far too much.

"Joe, we're not doing this anymore-"

"Why won't you help yourself! Having a murder's baby, is that really the life you want for your child? Will you tell them all the shit he does or not? If you just come down to the station and make a statement about anything you know or something, please, I can get you out of this I can help you!"

"I don't want your help! I love him, how can you think I'd marry him and then shop him in to you that quickly? I won't do anything like that so you have to stop asking."

"Fine. If he ever does hurt you then for the sake of that child you best come and tell me because I'll still listen, but I'm done trying to save you. If you want to live with him then that's your sin, not mine."

(Y/n) could feel tears welling up in her eyes but they were tears of frustration rather than tears of pain or heartache for her brother. She didn't need saving because she wasn't in danger, Joe was the one in danger constantly trying to pursue Ben and arrest him when he had nothing on him. It wasn't a sin to live with Ben because anything he did didn't reflect or lead to (Y/n), God may punish Ben but he had very little reason t punish (Y/n) other than her turning a blind eye to her husband.

Pressing her hand to her mouth, (Y/n) tried to calm her breathing that was starting to escalate rather quickly. There was no point getting angry when the conversation was over now.

A shudder ran through (Y/n) when Joe slammed the front door behind him and (Y/n) leaned her head back into the sofa as she closed her eyes. He didn't have the right to come round and say that and expect (Y/n) to understand when he didn't bother to listen to where she was coming from. She was happy, she had a husband and a baby and she wasn't oppressed or confined or told what she could and couldn't do. (Y/n) had a life now and it was her own and that was all down to Ben. She would never stab him in the back like that.

Tilting her head down, (Y/n) looked at her stomach and slowly started gliding her hand over her bump. Three more months and her life was going to change even more than it already had. She would have a proper family, a purpose and no one would be able to control her or tell her what to do or try and make her the perfect little girl.

"When you're here, everything will be better."

#ben hardy #ben x reader #ben hardy imagine #dad! ben #imagine #BoRhap #joe mazzello #joe mazello imagine #murderer! ben #shes a good girl

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bubbashawn · 5 years ago

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High School Musical

author: This is really not that great but I wanted to share a little something so here it is.

synopsis: Quarantine is upon you but you don’t know where to stay until a friend sets you up with Shawn Mendes himself.

warnings: it’s 1.9k of really bad writing. I’m sorry. Better news is I’m almost 3k into Fine Line part 1 and 800 into Vanity Fair part 2. Hope y’all have a little bit of a Shawn fill from this 😂 mention of anxiety and a corny pickup line.

“You know the university isn’t gonna be open for too much longer right?”

You love your best friend. Really, you do. But if Maddie mentioned the fact that you could be homeless soon, you might strangle her. The news was a constant reminder saying how colleges and schools across the world were being closed and everyone is expected to self quarantine.

You might be a bit dramatic in saying that you’d be homeless but after your mother kicked you out after you told her you’d be going to Toronto on a scholarship for literature and not her alma mater Cornell Law like she had planned, the idea of returning to your little boring hometown wasn’t an option.

“Tell me again why I can’t come stay with you?”

“You know I don’t have space plus my family can barely support itself much less another person.”

“I don’t need support financially, I just need shelter.”

“I’m sorry, Y/N,” she sighed at your crestfallen expression, “ask Brian?”

“He’s quarantining with his girlfriend in Los Angeles, they left a couple days ago.”

“He has hot friends, right?”

You started to ignore her as the ringing in your head increased. The headache of trying to find shelter caused so much stress and anxiety. You didn’t even notice the two of you were outside your room’s door until Maddie’s arms were wrapped around you. Whispering words of comfort.

“Give Brian a call,” she gave you a pointed look, “he grew up not far from here, so he probably has some half decent friend who’ll take you in.”

“I hate this.”

“I know, me too. I love you alright? Call Brian!”

She walked away offering one last squeeze on your shoulder before heading towards her room down the hall.

You groaned before opening the door in front of you. It’s not that you hate your roommates, it's just they can get loud and the pounding pain in your temple wasn’t going to ease off with all the noise. Grabbing your chunky knit blanket before smiling softly at the two girls partying in your room, you headed to the common room.

The space was awkwardly set up and left little room to stand when more than ten people were there but it was well past nine when you got there and no one seemed to be bothered to leave their rooms. You settled into the ugly green couch because it was by far the comfiest and pulled out your phone.

You hadn’t noticed how late it had really gotten until the soft glow of the sunset was gone and your face was illuminated by your phone screen.

Your phone ringer was going off with notifications. You ignored the texts from both Brian and Maddie to focus on the email quickly swiping your device open pausing the music immediately.

“Dear students and their families,” here it was, the from line reading University of Toronto, “We regret to inform you,” you could barely mumble the words much less read your eyes were watering too much. Everything was too blurry, “we regret to inform you that as of today March 13, 2020, all classes are canceled until further notice due to the virus…” your voice cut out while your eyes rescanned the email for key pieces you had missed. Canceled classes. Pack your things. Move out.

Everything was crashing and you huddled further into the armrest of the banged-up furniture you were sitting on.

“Fuck,” your phone was ringing again but you ignored whoever was calling you, too distracted by your breath closing in and the eerie question you couldn’t answer. What were you going to do?

You were freaked out, clutching your hand to your stomach trying to feel the rise and fall of your breath. Your eyes desperately opening and closing. What were you going to do?

“Shit,” your hand finding your phone when it started buzzing again and again, you threw it onto the ground, curling into yourself.

The panic had subsided barely when you realized your poor old phone was probably cracked if not broken from your frenzied tantrum. Your shaking hand grabbing it to assess the damage done.

“Fuck,” seeing multiple missed calls from friends, all aware of your situation, “fuck, fuck.”

You hesitantly answered when Brian tried you again.

“Y/N? You okay?”

“B-Brian? What am I, oh god, what am I going to do?”

“Hey, take a breath yeah?”

“Brian, I don’t have anywhere to go.”

“Yeah, that’s why I called,” he smiled softly when your breath started evening out, “I’ve got this friend who’ll probably go mad if he’s alone during quarantine. He gets in his head and stuff. He’s not some serial killer and is one of the nicest, genuine people I know. You might end up in Pickering, y’know where I grew up? But he’d be happy to let you stay.”

“I feel like I’d be imposing.”

“Don’t worry. He probably needs this more than you, believe me or not.”

“Really?”

“Yeah,” he chuckled when you sniffled, “I’ll give him a call, eh? Hold tight.”

Brian hung up.

To say you knew you’d end up outside an apartment building in downtown Toronto, you’d be lying. You had just slid out of the cab and found yourself enjoying the distant sight of the CN Tower praying that Brian’s friend had a decent view. More so that this friend wouldn’t kill you. As you moved closer to the doors, the glass showed a simplistic yet expensive interior and that was only the lobby.

The elevator had mirrors and the halls were so clean you’d probably be fine living in the hallway instead of the condo on the other side of the door you were staring at. Everything will be fine.

You knocked.

“Just a minute!” The shout was muffled from inside the room.

The door swung open not a moment later to reveal a young and astoundingly attractive male staring down at you. His curls were looped around his fingers when his hand brushed through his hair, a silver ring reflecting a flash of light. You took in his soft eyes, a scar on the apple of his cheek, his pillowy looking lips. In sweatpants and a knitted sweater he looked like pure heaven. You recognized him, of course you had, Shawn Mendes was not one to glance over even for an overworked student.

“Hi honey,” he looked down at you, “how did you get through? I thought the security was keeping out fans, it’s really not okay for you to be here.”

“Oh, um no. The security was very prompt so you shouldn’t run into any problems. And I’m not a fan, well I-I mean I am but that’s not why I’m here. Brian said you were expecting me? I have a keycard to your apartment which is how I got through the lobby. I didn’t want to just intrude by walking in though, I, um, I can come back later or call Brian for a different arrangement.”

“No,” he was smiling sheepishly, “no, sorry. You’re Y/N, right? Sorry I wasn’t thinking.”

You smiled and bit your nail shyly when he opened his door to let you into the spacious living room.

“I’m Shawn, by the way, and sorry for being an ass back there. We’ve had some run-ins with fans because of security issues the past few months so I was being cautious. Not that that’s an excuse or anything.”

“Don’t worry about it,” he was staring down at you, “really it’s okay. I should’ve had Brian let you know of my arrival or something. Honestly I didn’t know you were, well you…” you trailed off not knowing where that sentence was going.

Your eyes continued flitting back and forth between his enjoying the crinkles of smile lines you couldn’t see through a screen. You were so focused on the giant in front of you that your gaze almost missed the open floor to ceiling windows.

He definitely had a view.

You felt his eyes follow you when your figure shifted past him to stand closer to the sight of the city.

“Like the view?”

Your eyes snapped back onto him startled by his presence standing mere feet away. You smiled softly.

“It’s insane.”

“Yeah it’s the best view I’ve ever had. Especially right now.”

His eyes were on you but you let his stupid cliche and corny joke just giggling at his antics before turning back to his window.

It was in the early hours of the morning when Shawn started apologizing. Again.

“I’m so sorry. I feel so bad about earlier and you’re absolutely the sweetest person. I should’ve known and thought about the situation before jumping to conclusions. I swear my ego hasn’t gotten to my head that bad.”

“You need to stop apologizing,” he chuckled with you, “seriously it’s okay. And you’ve been nothing but kind to me since I’ve been here. I mean housewarming muffins? That’s the best. Plus I’m staying here with you so really I should be thanking you not listening to you say sorry.”

“It wasn’t okay for me to assume anything. Also brave of you to think the muffins were for you!”

“I’m enjoying them nonetheless,” he was smiling at you again, “stop that.”

“Stop what?”

“Smiling at me like that!”

“Like what?” He was chuckling again, “like what, Y/N?”

“Like that. You’re making me nervous.”

“Why?”

“Because you're way too kind and not hard to look at, I’m bound to be flustered by you.”

He just kept smiling down at you, his head tipping closer to your own. Jerk.

“I like making you blush.”

“You’re good at it. I barely know you and I’m probably in love with you.”

His head tilted back when he broke out in laughter exposing a perfect neck. He was literally perfect. The definition of perfection.

“You’re not,” his smile was full of mischief, “but I’ll get you to love me by the end of this.”

You leaned in your head enjoying how his breath hitched at your close proximity because he might affect you but you affected him just as much.

“Is that a bet?”

“Nope. A promise.”

He pressed his pillowy soft pink lips against the corner of your lips and enjoyed the taste of your coconut lip scrub that was now in his bathroom. He felt giddy.

“What will happen after quarantine?”

“You’ll move the rest of your stuff in, duh.”

He was being sassy.

“Mmhmm? And when will I meet the family?”

“I was thinking we could go there in a couple of days? I want to spend some time with them.”

“Wait really?”

“Yeah, I want to see them before we really hunker down. Is that okay with you?”

You smiled putting your arms around his neck the two of you far more comfortable in each other's presence than expected.

“Sounds good.”

“Ok,” he pressed his nose to yours lightly eyes gleaming in excitement, ecstatic at the idea of telling his family about the awesome girl in front of him “we’ll just stand six feet away.”

You both chuckled.

“Like we’re doing right now?”

“Baby, we’re in this together.”

“Yeah? Like High School Musical?”

“I’ll be your Troy.”

“You’re more of a Ricky.”

He gave you a look. Shawn’s ringlet curl flopping onto his forehead. Definitely a Ricky Bowen.

“I’m serious, we’re in this together.”

“I’m okay with that.”

And you were being truthful. You knew this situation was bringing you two closer much faster than normal but you hadn’t felt this safe in so long. Shawn was a stranger just hours ago but now he was already affecting your heart. You could see yourself falling in love with him by the end of all this. He might just keep his promise.

permanent taglist: @wholesomemendes @fallinallincurls @ashwarren32 @mendesficsxbombay @haute-shawn @turtoix @prncsnee @http-isabela

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