#i was going to post this on new year's but i got self-conscious and didn't

[delicious-in-imagines]

Hii! Hope you’re doing well :3! Could I request like basic relationship headcanons with Kabru, Chilchuck, and Laios? If not that’s totally fine! Hope you have a good day! :D

You got it, boss!

Kabru of Utaya

I've covered this before in other posts, but his eye for details when it comes to people is going to be used on you. He has a internal list of things you love and things that you hate, and often references it over the course of the relationship.

The only way that he cleans his room is if you're coming over. He'll ask you to return with him on a whim, and then realizes that 'oh shit, I can't have them see this,' and once you get back, he tries to make a distraction, or just asks you to hang out in the hallway as he struggles to stuff all of the shit on the floor under every piece of furniture he can. His landlord finds this endlessly amusing, and knows when you're coming over because Kabru is frantically trying to clean - he helps to give Kabru some pointers.

Loves to surprise you with things you mention in passing, a necklace or bracelet that you saw in a nearby stall, taking you out to a fancy place that you mentioned wanting to go to dinner, or even just something that you need that he noticed. Stuff like a new whetstone, a repair for your armor, anything like that.

He's not the biggest on embraces, but this is a man who loves to cuddle when the two of you are in bed. He absolutely enjoys wrapping his hands around you, either having you curling into his neck, or with your back slotted neatly against him. He always plays with your hands, linking your fingers together. He actually gets to the point that he can't sleep easily unless he at least has some part of his body touching yours.

Cup his face before kissing him, stare into his eyes and tell him something along the lines of 'I love the color of your eyes' and just watch him melt. He used to be self-conscious and hate his eyes, though it's something he's outgrown over the years, but he still loves to hear it come from your lips.

Chilchuck Tims

His love language is admonishing you - sorry not sorry. He's very much the kind of person that if he is barking at you while patching you up, or while trying to help you, that he cares deeply about you. He yells because he cares, if he didn't, he wouldn't say a word.

Before you get into a relationship, he's absolutely going to bring up his past, at least in some capacity. Even if it's part of his sordid past, you deserve to know. He promises that he's changed, but he also knows that the only way to prove that is through his actions.

Speaking of, he does want you to meet his daughters. He's not ashamed of them - quite the opposite, he loves them dearly, and he doesn't want to feel like he's hiding them from you, or you from them. Though, there's not enough words in the common language to express how relieved he is when his daughters like you.

Even though he hates interpersonal relationships in groups, he also starts to outgrow that in bits and pieces. While on the job, he's going to be a bit more aloof, though he absolutely will indulge a handhold, and will only marginally shoo you away when you press a little peck to his cheek or temple.

Though, whenever you take breaks, he's definitely more receptive to any open displays of affection, and will even come to you to initiate. Especially if you're sitting, he'll come up to you and cup your face, making you look up at him - which is something that he loves way too much to be healthy. He's used to people looking down towards him, so being able to tip your head up? It's like a drug for him.

He knows that he's a walking space heater, and anticipates you setting your bedroll beside his own. He'll open up his blanket and grouse until you settle down, sighing out and finally snuggling up to you. Whether you like to be the big spoon or the little spoon, he enjoys the casual closeness. Though, his favorite is if you're bigger than him - being the big spoon, or more aptly, your jetpack.

Laios Touden

Being able to share meals made up of meal parts is a dream come true for him. He might pout occasionally if you are unsure about whatever y'all are eating. But, whenever he can, if there's something that you genuinely liked - then he's more than willing to share with you! I like to think that sharing food or cooking it with him is a love language of his.

If you're willing to listen to him constantly rambling about his hyperfixation on monsters, he'll continue on excitedly before he'll cut himself off, stumbling over his words and apologizing. Please - please, please, please, reassure him, even if you just tell him, 'I might not fully understand, but I just like listening to you.' You'll have his heart immediately, looking at you so softly and wrapping you up in a hug and thanking you. He knows sometimes he can get carried away, but knowing that you value his joy even if you don't fully agree, it warms his heart.

I like to think that rather than defaulting to kisses for showing affection, that he head bonks. You know how cats do the bunting? Yeah, that. He'll come up to you while you're doing something mundane and just bonk his head against yours. Sometimes it's a little too harsh, but that's just how much he loves you.

Above anything else, he wants you to meet his sister. While he may not be able to, nor want, to take you home to his parents - he does want you to meet the family that he cares about most. He'll share stories about Falin, things they did when they were younger, or when they were gold strippers, though sometimes he cuts himself off when he feels overwhelmed with what has happened to his sister.

He's a sprawler when he sleeps, usually on his back - pulls the full starfish. So, if you want to cuddle, you'll have to sleep in the crook of his arm, where he'll close his arm to bring you closer to him. Sleeping on the rise and fall of his chest, hearing his thumping heart skip a beat every time that you rest your head there. When he wakes up first, he can't find it in himself to wake you, craning his head awkwardly to watch your sleeping form with the softest smile on his face.

[generalllimaginesss]

"If the entire human population was in front of me, I'd still choose you” with Jack.

I can only imagine what it would be like to have fans attack you if you were publicly dating him. I feel like Jack is so conscious of this. And he’s just soft boyfriend Jack trying to block out the unnecessary noise.

Maybe they just went public and she’s getting a lot of hate and it’s making her insecure. And Jack reminds her that it’s just them against the world and the only people whose opinions matter are their family and friends who love her.

Warnings: self depreciation, insecurities, self image issues, etc. Please don't read if you're not in a good headspace!!!

This is probably my favorite thing that I’ve written. I hope you like it as much as I enjoyed writing it!!

plus size! reader x Jack Hughes

••

You knew that dating somebody in the limelight would have its challenges. Hell, dating an average person was hard. But nothing could have prepared you for the magnitude of hate that hit as soon as Jack went public with your relationship.

It wasn't like the relationship was new. The two of you had been dating for almost a year before he decided to post you on his Instagram. You let Jack set the pace since he was used to the attention. He could let things go in one ear and out the other a lot easier than you could. He was almost conditioned to be able to do that. You, on the other hand, took everything very personally. Every comment about your weight, about what you wore, about how Jack looked miserable with you, they all hit you like a ton of bricks.

You didn't understand why all of these people were coming at you saying so many horrible things, but Jack tried his best to ease your mind and remind you that at the end of the day it was you and him.

He did a really good job at this normally, but he was away on a roadie for a few days and things began to get really bad. This started when you saw a fan account for Jack post something about how Jack downgraded from Sienna to you and all of the comments agreeing.

It was like a rabbit hole...once you clicked on that post it led you to many others. They all made you feel like shit, but when people started commenting on your body, saying that they "didn't know Jack dated plus size girls," it hurt. Your body was yours. It wasn't like you could just zip it off and find a new one, but if you could you would, just to shut the comments up.

You spent the 3 days Jack was gone in a really dark depression. No laundry was done, you hadn't showered, and you barely could make yourself get out of bed to brush your teeth. Dishes piled in the sink, but you couldn't make yourself do them. You knew the signs of your depression, but you welcomed them in a way, almost like a coping mechanism. Not allowing people to see you was the only way the haters couldn't get new material. Was it a healthy way to cope? Obviously not, but it was what worked in the moment.

As soon as Jack walked through the front door, returning from the games, he could tell something wasn't right. You always kept up with the chores when he was away, normally making the house spotless before he got back. So when he saw the state of the kitchen and eventually the rest of the house, he knew something was off.

When he walked into the bedroom and saw that you were pretty much in the same spot he left you in he immediately dropped his bags and climbed into the bed with you, forcing you to look at him.

He gently shifted your body to face him, cupping your cheek gently with his hand.

"Baby, what happened," He made note of the streaks that stained your face, probably from countless hours of crying. He wanted to make them disappear immediately. You were his happy-go-lucky, carefree girl. You danced around the house all the time, singing whatever song was playing. This side of you was uncharted territory that he wanted to take away so bad.

"I just need you to hold me," You began to hyperventilate, worried that if he didn't hold you that he would leave you. Even though that would never in a million years cross his mind. But he did as you asked, and whether it was for 5 minutes or 30 minutes, he didn't know. He held you until you pulled away.

"Can we talk about it?" Jack asked, pulling the hair that crusted on your cheek from the tears out of your face. He treated you like you were fragile, and you hated that he felt that way.

"It's just the comments, Jack. I'm already insecure sometimes and these people come at me in so many horrible ways," You began to explain, loose tears streaming down your face, but you were composed otherwise.

"They compare me to Sienna, and God, I know I'm not as pretty as her. They tell me I'm fat and that they didn't know you dated "fat" girls. It's just insane. Do they not realize that I actually am a real person with real emotions? Do they know that I've believed, at some point in time, the things they are saying? I've worked so hard to get to this place where I'm at, to love who I am, and within the span of 3 days they just tear it all down," You let the words just flow from your mouth, whatever thought that comes to mind is voiced to Jack.

"Baby, they don't care. They don't care because they're jealous," He tries to soothe you, but it almost made you mad. Not at Jack, but at the whole situation.

"What the fuck are they jealous of? My thighs that I cover with leggings and pants so that I won't have to go through the pain of them chafing? Are they jealous of the fucking stretch marks that go up my stomach, so I refuse to wear regular bikini bottoms? I mean what the fuck, do they want my anxiety and depression? I will gladly give them that..." The tears were beginning to pick up, but Jack continued to rub your back, waiting to get the chance to speak again.

"I know you could have any girl you wanted. It makes me sick when I see some blonde walk past that looks like she stepped out of a magazine because I know that's what you deserve. You don't deserve this. You're Jack fucking Hughes," You looked at him, your lip quivering. You were going to say something else, but Jack put his finger on your lips, gently stopping you from continuing.

"You gotta stop that. I can't let you keep putting yourself down like this, not when I love you with my whole fucking heart," He began.

"First off, I had that. I had whatever you consider a girl walking out of a magazine is. Look how that turned out. It didn't, did it? You don't look like Sienna, and I'm so fucking glad because I don't want her kind of beautiful. I want your kind. I want to see all of the things on your body that show me that you lived. I don't want some manufactured cookie-cutter girlfriend. I want somebody that nobody else has," He pulled you in for a hug, continuing to talk while placing kisses ever so gently on your cheek and neck, looking out the window at the busyness that was the outside world. All he could think about was how you didn't see what he saw. Why couldn't you see it?

"Baby, I want you to realize something. If the entire human population was in front of me, I'd still choose you. Without a second thought, with no regrets. Every. Single. Time. You have such a special relationship with my brothers and that means the absolute world to me. They love you so much. My parents tell me I should marry you anytime that you come up in the conversation. The entire team has commented on how much happier I am with you. And if I'm being completely honest, at the end of the day I don't give a damn what anybody else has to say because it's me and you until the end. Do you understand me?" He broke the hug, cupping your face with both hands and wiping at the tears with his thumbs.

"I love you," You whisper, your voice long gone by now.

Jack pulls your forehead toward his lips, kissing it for a few seconds before letting your head go.

"I love you, too. More than you, or anybody else, will ever know. Now, I think we could go for some cleaning karaoke, yeah? I'll wash the dishes if you'll dry them," He poked at your side, trying, and succeeding, in forcing a grin on your face.

"Only if we can get a shower together afterwards," You bargained, taking in the beautiful boy.

"Deal," He says and drags you off to the kitchen, connecting his phone the the speaker and blaring Dierks Bentley's new song "Beer at My Funeral," occasionally twirling you in a circle.

The water may or may not have gotten everywhere since Jack decided it was a good idea to spray you with the hose that connected to the sink, but he enjoyed every second that he got chased by you around the island.

Once the dishes were put up and the shower washed away the remaining bit of your depression, Jack couldn't help but to just admire you. He promised himself then that he would remind you so often of how beautiful you were so that would be the only words ringing through your head, taking up any space that the hate may have. Because it was true. You were the most beautiful and precious thing that had ever walked into his life, and he'd be damned if anyone made you feel otherwise.

*

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[avatar-anna]

The Final Show

this is the first of a few oneshots i'm doing of harry's final show(s). currently working on ones for professor and latina!y/n, but those will come later. enjoy!

Young Dad! Harry x Young Mom! Reader

"What are you doing over there?"

Y/n had been looking for her husband for the last fifteen minutes. Rehearsals were wrapped up a while ago, the sounds of fans waiting to enter the venue were echoing through certain hallways, and everyone had kind of scattered to their own corners before it was time to really start getting ready. Y/n had taken advantage of the downtime to put Natalia and Geneva down for a nap and feed her other children, and now that the twins were playing with their toys, and Simone and Collette were watching a movie with Jeff, she took it upon herself to look for Harry, who had quietly disappeared without anyone noticing.

She'd checked out all his usual hiding places—the kids' dressing room/playroom, craft services, his own dressing room—but he was nowhere to be found. Y/n wasn't even going to check the stage, but she'd heard noise coming from an open door and decided to follow it.

Harry was sitting by himself at a piano, playing a melody Y/n hadn't heard before. He didn't play the piano often, as he wasn't as confident in his ability to play as he was with the guitar. Even after all these years, he still got self-conscious playing in front of people, especially new material. Y/n knew he had no reason to be shy about playing any kind of instrument or showing off a new song, but she made her presence known to him before approaching anyway, giving her husband time to pause and collect himself.

"Just messing around," he said. Turning his head, Harry smiled, then opened his arms up toward her.

Y/n took the invitation and sat down in his lap, her arms immediately reaching around his neck to play with his hair. "You ready for tonight?" she asked, leaving the topic of the piano alone. For now. He'd open up to her eventually.

"Think so," Harry said. "I'm excited to come home and spend some real time with you and the kids, but..."

"I get it. It's okay to miss this," she told him, running the back of her knuckle against his cheekbone.

Their lives were so polarizing at times, and Y/n understood his mixed emotions about the end of the tour better than anybody. She knew how much Harry loved performing and traveling and creating such unique memories with his band and crew and fans, especially the fans. But he loved his family too, and while it was nice to have the kids on tour, it was a completely different thing to be a proper parent at home, and Y/n would be lying if she said she wasn't looking forward to being a semi-normal family again.

"It's gonna be an emotional night, that's for sure," Harry concluded, leaning forward to kiss Y/n's cheek. "Got lots of fun stuff planned."

"I can't wait."

And, just because they were alone and she could, Y/n leaned in, hand tightening in the back of his hair as her mouth slid over his.

The kiss was long and slow, languid and easy, so unlike the hurried pecks they gave each other when they were running around doing a million different things. It made Y/n melt against Harry's chest, had him gripping her hips a little tighter.

"I'm gonna miss it too, you know," Y/n said, mumbling the words against the scruff on his jaw.

"Are you?" Harry asked, half teasing, half serious.

Y/n took her time answering, kissing his neck and around his ear first before going back to take his bottom lip between her teeth. "Of course. You know I love watching you perform. And I love traveling and showing the kids all sorts of things. And I love your post-performance adrenaline rush."

Harry chuckled and tucked a strand of hair behind Y/n's ear. "Oh. So that's what you're going to miss."

"Among other things," she said with a playful shrug.

One thing Y/n could count on was the last of Harry's energy being spent totally on her. Whether it was the moment he stepped offstage and he dragged her into his dressing room for a quickie, or late at night once all six of their children were asleep, he always worked himself up enough during his shows that he had to dispel his adrenaline somehow, and that was usually with his wife. And after hours of being a mom and changing diapers and putting a stop to fights and making sure everyone ate their veggies and no one had strayed too far away, she loved being the center of Harry's attention. When he had a good show, she had a good night, when he had an excellent show...well, Y/n was usually left feeling like she'd been the one performing for hours.

Pulling her impossibly closer, he said, "I'll just have to find another way to satisfy you, then."

"You always do."

When they kissed again, Y/n's heart fluttered in her chest, excitement from a multitude of things putting her in a good mood. And she could tell Harry felt the same, his hands eagerly gripping what they could, just stopping short of reaching beneath her clothes.

"I think I'm gonna play something special tonight," he muttered against her lips after a few minutes passed.

Y/n nearly grinned at how well she knew her husband. She managed to contain it and pull back just enough to say, "Oh?"

Harry shrugged and tried to be casual, but his words were anything but. "I've had this melody playing in the back of my mind all day."

"You should play it then. I think everyone will love it," Y/n said, pushing a stray curl out of his eyes.

The corners of Harry's mouth curved up, dimples indenting his cheeks. "I think tonight is gonna be one for the history books."

Y/n smiled at him endearingly as she couldn't help but agree.

*.*

"I have people here tonight who have supported me in so many ways over the past thirteen years in which you can only imagine. I would not be on this stage without them and their love and support," Harry said into the mic.

For a moment, his eyes darted to the side of the stage where Y/n was holding a sleeping baby in her arms. Simone was standing next to her and cheering, with Collette on Simone's other side and waving at Harry with a big grin. The twins were on Y/n's other side, and GiGi was standing tiredly on her feet, a large set of noise-cancelling headphones on her head. One little hand was gripping Y/n's finger, though by the quick look Harry took, she was not a happy camper.

She wants you, Y/n mouthed with a shrug. Harry's heart squeezed for a moment, then quickly blew Geneva a kiss before continuing his speech.

The concert continued on, and Harry performed his heart out. Y/n watched from the side of the stage with Natalia in her arms, occasionally spinning Jules and Maeve around or dancing with Simone and Collette. It was technically past their bedtime, but Y/n decided that tonight was a special occasion. They would be home soon and back to their normal schedule anyway. What was one night of fun?

Harry kept looking over to where she and the kids were, and each time she gave him a thumbs up or blew him a kiss while the twins, Simone, and Collette waved at him excitedly and shouted, "Daddy!" GiGi was still in a bit of a mood, not quite understanding why she couldn't go to Harry when he was so close, but then again, she was turning out to be a bit of a daddy's girl, so Y/n wasn't all that surprised.

There was one point toward the end of the show where Harry became so overcome with emotions that he sank to his knees. Y/n didn't have to be a mind reader to know what was going through his head. It had been a very emotional few years, more than any of his fans would be able to understand. They'd gone through a lot—as parents and as partners—but everything they'd endured and sacrificed and experienced had led right to this moment. Y/n knew that this tour itself contained some of the happiest moments of Harry's life simply because of the environment and the energy created by his fans, but she also knew that having his family close by for a majority of it, and knowing that they were on the other side of a lot of the obstacles they'd previously been facing, played a part in that joy too.

A strong wave of emotion took over Y/n then too, making her throat go tight and her eyes well with tears. No one in the crowd except a select few would truly understand exactly what Harry meant when he talked about family and support. He truly would not be the same person he was today if it weren't for the seven people off to the side of the stage. Just a couple years ago, their lives were so different, there were so many unknowns, but right now, everything seemed to be perfect, and Y/n understood Harry more than anyone when he expressed that he wasn't quite ready to let it all go.

Caught up in her own emotions, Y/n noticed too late that Geneva had slipped her hand out of Y/n's. Before she could even utter a word, the two year old was running straight for Harry, who was still kneeling onstage with his hands covering his face.

For a moment, Y/n's heart stopped. This wasn't how this was meant to happen. It wasn't supposed to happen at all. Harry, Y/n, and Harry's team had been so careful about keeping their children's identity safe, out of the public eye. Things were slowly starting to change with Y/n going with Harry to the Grammys, and the documentary that was set to release a few months after Love on Tour ended would definitely bring their family out into the public. But those were all carefully selected events. GiGi running out onstage while one hundred thousand people, and possibly more, were watching was not part of the plan.

Y/n watched the scene unfold before her with slight terror and a boatload of anxiety swelling in her chest. She wasn't sure if Harry was too lost in his own head to notice his daughter run up to him or if she'd start crying as the screams from the crowd increased tenfold.

Thankfully, Harry's reaction was immediate. He looked surprised, like he couldn't quite believe Geneva was suddenly next to him onstage at his show. One look at Y/n's face seemed to tell him everything, though, and his smile was surprisingly relaxed for someone whose daughter the world didn't know about just ran out onstage.

*.*

"Hi, peanut. What are you doing out here, huh?" Harry asked, kissing Geneva's forehead gently, keeping his voice soft as he spoke to her. He was sort of freaking out on the inside, but he tried not to show it, seeing as Y/n was already visibly worried about the situation at hand.

"Home, Daddy," she said, her chubby baby cheeks making her pout all the more adorable.

"You ready for bed, my love?"

GiGi nodded, then promptly rested her head against his chest, making it clear she didn't want to be anywhere else at the moment. And part of Harry didn't want to hand her off to anyone else. He loved it when any of his kids came to him for comfort. It made him feel so fulfilled when all any of them wanted was a cuddle from Dad.

But at the same time, he still had a show to put on. In a split second, an idea formed in Harry's head, and all it took was one look to his band for them to catch his meaning. They started to play a melody, an early transition into the next song while he took care of Geneva.

As he stood up, Harry was careful to turn his back to the crowd so that as little of his daughter's face was shown to the crowd as possible. He trusted the camera team to focus themselves anywhere else but him right now, but that didn't account for the thousands of phones most likely pointed in his and Geneva's direction; though, as he paid a little more attention, he realized that the crowd was quiet, like they could tell that the baby in his arms was trying to sleep and didn't want to disturb her.

That thought brought a smile to Harry's face as he stepped offstage where Y/n was trying to position Natalia so she could hold GiGi too. When he reached her, Harry rested a hand on her shoulder and kissed her cheek. "Relax, Mama. I've got her."

"I'm so sorry, H. She took off so fast, and I—"

"It's okay. I promise," Harry said. "She asleep yet?"

Y/n looked at where Geneva's cheek squished against her dad's chest. "Getting there."

"Five minutes, then," Harry said simply, trying to relax Y/n, who still looked terrified. Leaning in, he murmured so that only she could hear. "It's okay, Mama. We'll figure it out after. Let's just enjoy tonight, yeah? Think of the post-performance adrenaline, hm?"

That got Y/n to smile and nod slightly. He waited until the tension in her shoulders eased, then looked at the rest of his family, who also looked a little surprised that Geneva ran onstage in the middle of the show. Julian was the first to recover his shock and launched himself at Harry, which caused Maeve to jump up and down around him.

"Did you see us, Daddy? We were dancing to your song!"

"I did, JuJu. You were so good!"

"What about me, Daddy?"

"Can I go onstage too?"

"I want to play music with Pauli!"

Harry sighed, knowing they couldn't go out onstage. He could only imagine how fun—and chaotic—that would be, but it was still important that his little family stayed safe and unknown to the public.

"You know what, Maevie? I think we should let Pauli focus on the show, but maybe you can play music with him tomorrow," Y/n said gently, running a finger along Maeve's cheek.

It was clear Maeve didn't love that idea, and Harry was worried that she was going to pitch a fit or start crying, but Simone walked over to her sister. "We can play band right here, Maevie. You can be Pauli, and JuJu can be Uncle Mitch and Collette can be Auntie Sarah and play the drums."

Harry couldn't have loved his oldest daughter more than he did right then. She was always so good with her brother and sisters, even though they were a lot younger than her. He gave Y/n a look, who had passed Natalia off to Glenne, who had shown up with Jeff backstage after the whole toddler-running-onstage incident. Y/n smiled and reached for Geneva again, but not before giving him a kiss on the cheek and a squeeze to the hand.

"Go. Your fans are waiting for you."

Harry passed Geneva to Y/n, almost a little reluctantly, even though he knew he had to get back out there, that the five minutes he allowed himself were almost up. Almost like she could see the hesitancy on his face, Y/n leaned in one more time. "Go, baby. That post-performance adrenaline isn't going to make itself, and I want to celebrate tonight."

That was enough for him to finally hand over Geneva. Grinning, he kissed Y/n, then kissed the heads of each of his kids. Harry shook his head and his hands, trying to get back into his performance headspace, trying to forget about the fact that his daughter just revealed herself to the public. All of that could be dealt with after the show. Right now, there was a crowd waiting for him to give them the finale they deserved, and Harry would be damned if he didn't give it to them.

[cherry-bomb-ships]

Wanted to get some creative flow going while staying low-effort, so here's a screenshot redraw/edit/whatever you wanna call it, because I was curious how Mojo would look in the show with all my headcanons and little flourishes that I add when I draw him -w- So here's my redraw and the original screenshot, plus a version wif his OG palette since the lighting in the scene I decided to redo is all reddish

[Any reblogs and comments are seen and appreciated!! 🥺🥺 Also click for higher quality. Under the cut I put some of my thought process on my changes ehe ❤]

So the first thing I have to mention is one of my favorite changes: that little chip out of his ear! I mean, it's not a lot to explain if you just think about it for a second. This poor chimp has taken a LOT of beatings over the years, there's no way that he wouldn't have some physical scars from all that, so I figured the best shorthand way to show that would be giving him that notch. I like to imagine that he's self-conscious about it too 🥺

Second most notable change, I always like giving him a little tooth poking out because I watched a lot of anime as a teen Because with those sharp teeth of his, the idea of one poking out makes sense and also just looks cool to me -w-💖💖�� I like to think it's a side effect of the PPG movie when he got all huge, cuz his canines also got extended so much that they were poking out from his mouth

So the thicker outline around the bottom of his eyes is something that the original show actually did, in the Powerpuff Girls Rule 10th anniversary special! That stuck with me ever since and rly made me question why he didn't always have it 😭💖😭💖

Even if I prefer his rounder design pre-movie, I can't deny that I adore the sharper, M-shaped nose that they gave him later on and I wanted to keep that. The sharp lines just make sense to me and line up with the shape theory of "sharp=mean and evil". Plus it looks like an M! For Mojo! :3

So this change is a more subtle one and is also a very new idea I had, but I gave his pupils a purple tone instead of being pure black! In all honesty it was inspired by one of the cover arts of the newest PPG comics coming out currently where the artist gave him purple eyes. In my mind they used to be a light brown and got tinted purple from his mutation, along with the whites going pink.

Alright final thing (I think), I know I touched on the notch out of his ear, but when it comes to his ear shape in general, I like to find a happy middle ground between his fully rounded ears they drew on him pre-movie, and the sharp almost elf-like ears they gave him post-movie. Like I said earlier, the sharpness reads as more villainous!

Oh wait! Okay last thing for real: I love giving him a bit more fur around his face, purely for the fact that I think it looks good and cute uwu 💖💖💖💖💖💖

If you read this far please either reblog or comment with your thoughts, I'd be so honored 🥺💖

[fountainpenguin]

Riddle watches New Wish - Post #12

Stanky Danky

Me: Huh, Mark's extended family must have stopped dropping by to eat the pollution. Mr. Guzman: There's even trash in space! Me: oh no

I like how Hazel consistently wears her hair covering at night. The first time I heard this show would have a black girl for a protagonist (like a year+ ago), I was really nervous about whether it would be handled well- I'd braced myself for "trying too hard to score diversity points."

I have to say, I've liked the hair style variety within her own family, and I feel like there have been more black background characters than I remember from the OG show (though I didn't go practically frame by frame in the OG like I'm doing for this liveblog).

I didn't say it in "Trial or Hair-or," but I enjoyed how Hazel formed a stronger bond with and love for her hair, as I feel like that would be important to her personal identity. I like how she always wears this hair covering to bed. Little details like that make me feel so much more at ease about something I was really nervous about for what feels like 15 months.

SLKDJFSLDKJF Cosmo and Wanda are still sleeping in separate beds. I mean, that's standard Fairy culture in my 'fics, so it works for me.

Trash monster is nice! Didn't see that coming.

Hazel: I wish he could speak at least a few words? /wish granted and he can speak only a few words

I knew it, Kennueth IS on a cliff in that poster. I'm surprised Hazel had to wish for him to breathe air last episode.

Uh-oh, it's Dimmadome time- WHAT DO YOU MEAN "one-time use helicopter??" Sir, you can't bring that to an event about polluting less and saving the earth! ... Is Dale in there? I have to assume so. I've been missing him.

Me: Aww, Dale looks just like his old self! Awesome, and easier to recognize when he's not panning across the- OH MY GOSH!!! Dale: When I was your age, I spent my Saturdays working in a factory underneath a lemonade stand >:/ (Pulls out photo of him from "Nectar of the Odds"

Sir. SIR!! Do not repeat the abuse cycle with your son!

-> I hate that he just carries this around. Dale, you need to let it go. And maybe sue Vicky, idk.

I'm CRYING, I love how they gave him false teeth. That's hilarious.

The boots... That's a Dimmadome, all right.

Like, on some level I'm glad Doug spoiled him after he was rescued from Vicky's lemonade horror show, but I'm gettin' a bad feeling...

I can only assume this family tells horror stories about Vicky. This is the funniest anti-hero backstory ever. I was also going to treat Dale's torment 100% seriously in 'fic, but this is way more fun.

They are not cutting any corners. They didn't even change his backstory; he literally got tormented underneath a lemonade stand for 7 years. That's the one piece of canon he was given in the OG show and by golly, are they sticking to it.

Did Vicky take over the lemon torture pit from someone else?? Did she start this gig when she was 9? Is she gettin' retconned? Hm.

They definitely do not drink lemonade in the Dimmadome house. Please let me see Hazel offering Dev his first taste. If we don't get that as an episode someday, I'm writing a 'fic.

Dev trying to get out of pollution clean-up day: But... is our company even earth-conscious?

Too funny.

Okay, I've been thinking about it ever since Episode 1, but why didn't Dale get a fairy? I was waving it off under the assumption he'd only been underground for a couple days max, but... with 7 years, now I have questions.

-> Did Vicky move her lemonade kids around? The stand wasn't always on Timmy's front lawn, but... Surely Cosmo or Wanda would've detected him if he WAS under Timmy's lawn for 7 years.

WELP, trash monster's upset there's not gonna be more trash to eat if they clean it all up. I can see the problem. Uh-oh...

Why do I get the feeling that Dale has said "Come to Daddy," to the trash monster more than he's said it to his own son?

Hazel's parents didn't come to the trash clean-up?

sldkfjsdklfj he's still got the boots... I hate him /affectionate.

There is something severely funny to me about how they've made it clear they took inspiration from Dale's canon design, but his adult design lost his fluff and cowlick and has sleeker, professional hair. Something about this feels very correct for this art style because I feel like a lot of the adults have shiny hair without little tufts and decorations. I might redo my adult designs.

Oh, Hazel doesn't even know that's Dev's dad because she didn't see his mental pictures in Episode 1. This keeps getting better. I love how she also said "That guy with the ridiculous boots" after I pointed out the boots. Yes, Hazel, we've been over this... He's a Dimmadome.

Cosmo and Wanda in their apartment again! Just chillin'.

I don't know why I didn't expect Dev's drones to be called Dimmadrones.

Dale to the trash monster: You're like a son to me! Dev in the background:

The moon is still a waxing crescent when you're in space? ... I mean, I guess.

Peace of Pizza

Ya know, I'm surprised we haven't seen the Ya Boix drinks come up more than the fact that Kev sponsors them (mentioned in 2 episodes). I guess it's nice that they were depth for a side character, but that surprises me since they're the first thing you see in the theme song.

Ooh, Dev's in the title card! Where's this going?

I like how Hazel was using Cosmo pencil to stab Wanda eraser. She may have fairies, but she's still a bored schoolkid.

I... I was going to cheer that we had a list of names for classmates, but uh...

The Kindness Chart isn't in alphabetical order. I feel like putting Dev at the bottom was a targeted move.

Or it's reverse alphabetical since she's Hazel Wells and he's Dev Dimmadome.

It's still a waning crescent?

Maybe I'm old-school, but "pea pod aliens" is setting off all my alarm bells.

... Aliens are insisting everyone loves pizza, but what if someone's lactose intolerant?

Okay, since we're just coming off the episode where Dale reminded Dev he was locked underground making lemonade for 7 years, I feel like I don't blame Dev for not trusting anyone?

Like, I get the feeling his dad is emotionally absent, but this might not entirely be his dad's doing. I'm not sure I'd trust people either if my dad got yoinked for 7 years when he was my age.

Especially since Vicky's whole thing is that she's nice until she starts bullying. Yeah... don't trust.

sdfklj, Dev slam-dunking his stuff in the trash can and backflipping away. That's so unnecessarily extra.

Does the news never have anything important to report? ... I'm glad Winn brought up the thought of getting their own pizza, since I was wondering about that myself.

SLKDFJSDF...

Hazel: Dev, I have someone here who wants to talk to you! Dev: What's she doing? The Closer: She's trying to use someone close to you to appeal to your emotions. Dev: ... ?? No one's close to me. wtf. /scene change where Cosmo is dressed as Dev's dad.

Oh, this is gonna go great.

Dev, instantly switching gears after hearing "his father"'s voice through the door: ... Dad? You took off work for this?

Ruh-roh.

-> Wanda can read him like a dog-eared book.

So... She- she's gonna report this to Jorgen, right? I feel like she's supposed to do that. She's gonna tell him this kid is ticking multiple misery boxes, right? She's not just gonna ignore this... Wanda, please.

Not sure how I feel about the running gag that so many adults look like Timmy's adult self from "The Big Problem." Throws me off every time and I wasn't a fan of that design anyway, so it feels weird.

HE'S LACTOSE INTOLERANT, I KNEW IT! ... Well, not really him specifically, but I was on the right track.

Oh, this is terrible. Am I mistaken, or aren't lactose intolerant pills like, $10? Does he know? Does he know.

Dev: I thought lactose-free pizza was just a myth?

Dale, you're a terrible father.

Also, I like how a lot of effort was put into converting their designs to 2D, right down to Dev's yellow zipper stripe:

Okay, that's enough for this post... On to "A New Dev-elopment"!

[haveyouseenthisskeleton]

I'd love to read any of your HC posts about the older brothers having a trying time when their younger brothers go through the rebellious teenage stage.

Undertale/Horrortale Sans & Papyrus - Papyrus was complicated to deal with. As he grew up, Sans struggled to stay updated about his personality changes. One day he's all bubbly and overconfident, the next day he's goth and doesn't want anyone to talk to him anymore. He's a bit confused about what's going on. Added to that, Papyrus' ways to dig into people's stuff that everyone found cute when he was little turns out to not be so cute anymore so he struggles a lot with loneliness and his inability to make friends. He comes home late, or he doesn't even come home at all, which worries Sans a lot. It became worse when Papyrus started talking about his yellow flower friend that Sans had never seen, so Sans got a little more worried for his brother. But the fact he could talk to at least someone -imaginary or not- is a relief, because that was never Sans' best skill.

Underswap Sans & Papyrus - Honey never really had a rebel stage. Around his teenage years, he shut down and told nothing to his brother anymore. Blue felt guilty, because, with his dreams to enter the Royal Guard, he kinda pushed away his brother a little bit because Honey was too needy and holding him back. Blue tried to talk to him, but never got more than a growl or a nod as all answer. It became worrying when he found more and more cigarettes and bottles of alcohol around the house, and Honey immediately became defensive when he tried to talk about this, saying he didn't need help. The brothers were not really close during that time. Honey got self-aware of this after a few months and tried to get closer to Blue again, but Blue was in training for the Royal Guard and clearly didn't have time for him. So instead of talking to someone, Honey fell into depression and just kinda let the world move on without him, waiting to see what would happen.

Underfell Sans & Papyrus - "I JOINED THE ROYAL GUARD." "the hell you mean you joined the royal guard?! you're barely 15!" "YOU SAID YOU WERE TIRED TO HAVE ME AROUND AND TO BE USEFUL FOR ONCE!" "i didn't mean enroll in the army and go die stupidly for monsters who don't give a shit about you!" "WELL THAT'S TOO LATE NOW SO PISS OFF." Yeah. Edge was something. It's mainly Red's fault though. Red never asked to raise a child on his own and he was harsh on Edge, doing his best to teach him how to survive, even if he had to be mean to do that. He didn't mean Edge to enter the Royal Guard though, he never wanted that. But Edge never listened to him anyway so he didn't have the last word on this. He didn't have enough anxiety, you know. Now he has to live with the fear his brother might die any day.

Swapfell Sans & Papyrus - That's around Rus' teenage years when the brothers stopped talking to each other. Nox entered the guard at a young age, while Rus was manipulated by rebels and educated on how bad the Queen and the Royal Guard were. Obviously, when Rus learned his brother joined the guard, he got mad, and then left the house and didn't come back. Rus met the wrong people, and he slowly let them convince him to try alcohol as a solution to any problem, which obviously didn't help him feel better.

Fellswap Gold Sans & Papyrus - Wine was very conscious about Coffee's different ways of seeing the world. He didn't know what autism was at the time, but he knew for sure that his brother didn't understand the way the world worked and that eventually, the world would have crushed him before he got a chance to defend himself. So Wine, young captain at the time, kept him locked and busy so he didn't get killed. With his new status, he knows Coffee is more protected but also more of a target, so he's scared to find only his ashes in the morning. That actually makes Coffee's social anxiety even worse, as Wine prevented him to develop any social skills. Coffee was only talking with his brother and that weird Temmie he sneaked in when Wine was leaving in mission. He had several rebellion phases, where he escaped the house and gave his brother panic attacks, but Coffee almost died during one of the runaways and decided Wine was right, even though he's sick of being locked in the house all the time. Wine has definitely a part in Coffee's social problems, and safety doesn't explain everything.

[imagination-mess]

The Cambion (Demon!Izuku) (2/3)

This is an alternative universe where demons can be familiar to witches or wizards to assist and, most of all, as protectors. Witches and wizards can create pacts with demons.

Word Count: 1.3+ (2/3)

A/N: Tumblr has a limit on how much you can put in singular post how much you can post. I was forced to put it into three different posts. If you wish to see a singular post about it, here is the link to Ao3.

Part 1

Demon! Izuku Midoriya:

The two of you talked a bit more. You see that he wasn’t that convinced. You took him to a witch whose expertise is in demons and a doctor for demons. The witch confirmed your theory that Izuku’s power is just latent. It will take a while for them to show up. He just needs to get muscle into his body if he ever wants those powers to show up or even use them.

“I am going to be blunt. Your body or mind is nowhere in a state to hold any power; you die, regardless of being immortal.”

“There was a case a long time ago of a demon whose powers were latent like yours. He did everything in the book to provoke them and got involved with the dark sorcerer. He got what he wanted but died because his body at the time wasn’t suited to handle it.” The older demon, who's familiar with the witch demon doctor, butts in.

The doctor took a single glance up and down at him, making him even more self-conscious than he already was.

It was a lot of information to process. When you took him back to your dorm, you had an upgraded dorm since you reached the level you needed to summon Demon Familiar. You also have a benefactor who is already funding your education. Someone who believed in you despite not going to the Academy of Witches. You were behind compared to the rest of the student body. You aren’t the only one behind and playing catch-up, either.

Izuku asks his final question to determine his decision to make a pact to become familiar to you until death. He was afraid of the answer, but he needed to know. He isn’t the prettiest demon or the strongest. He is just an outcast demon that has horns and wings but doesn’t match the definition of a demon.

"Do you believe I have the potential to become a powerful demon?”

“Yes."

Your prompt response surprised him. You didn’t hesitate in your response. He felt emotional and had someone who believed in him.

That night, he made a pact with you.

You didn’t hesitate to answer him because you felt his raw power clashing with and completely overwhelming your power. You had to have more energy to balance this and make it stable enough. There were cracks in the ground underneath the summoning circle because of how much he was overwhelming your abilities.

Unknown to the Izuku, you and the demon witch doctor already knew why his abilities were latent. The clear sign of the demon’s esteem is through their horn conditions. The other factor is being a Cambion. It has been reported throughout history. These beings have a much harder time having good control over their abilities. At the news of finding out, it took him much longer to learn to fly until he was eleven years old.

It’s secret and kept out of the demon's knowledge because the demon will just focus on physical perception instead of working on both the mind and body. They will get frustrated seeing how their horns aren’t improving, but rather the horns are in a worse state than previously.

It took a while for Izuku to adjust to this new environment, but once he got adjusted, he was still thinking of an alias to use since names are powerful things around here.

You would bring him books on topics that he wanted to know, such as demons who were latent just like him. It took a long time to get your hands on them, but you gave them to him. He was doing a bunch of research, learning more about his kind.

He found a lot of things he didn't know about, and he is rare, but it gave him a new perspective. He shouldn’t think like the demons he grew up around, but be patient with himself. It will take longer for him, and it’s avoidable. There are a lot of baby steps to take.

He was thankful that you asked around to get your hands on an electronic version of the journal of Cambion, as familiar as the legendary witch from centuries ago.

He was very grateful for how patient you were with him and for getting all of the information he wanted to know if you didn’t know the answer. He wasn’t able to enter the library because he was a newbie and needed to wait a year until he could have access to it.

He rambled your ear off and immediately shut down, realizing he was talking too much. It took a while for him to be comfortable and stop apologizing for his rants.

You took him to get his haircut because the mantled hair was too much; even the hair stylist couldn’t help him. There were a lot of dead ends. His hair reached down to the lower part of his back. The hairstylist explained to him the importance of getting his hair trimmed once in a while and why.

He has much shorter hair, and it took a while to adjust. His head felt so much lighter now.

You taught him basic personal hygiene. Demons and human personal hygiene are different, but there are slight similarities.

You know he has shown interest in hitting the gym and running around, but you also noticed how hesitant he was to go to the gym or run around campus like the rest of the demons around. You believe it was because he was self-conscious about his appearance. That’s when you introduced him to your friend’s demon known as Red Riot; it was his alias since personal names are the most powerful but also the most dangerous to give out carelessly.

You already talked to the demon before introducing him to Izuku. Red Riot brought him along to the gym when there were barely any people there, and he ran around when there weren’t any demons around.

Red Riot helped him a lot and gave him a lot of knowledge on working out perspectives. He was thankful; he wasn’t judging but rather encouraging him.

You also told him about a therapist and let him have the option to refuse the idea of it. He accepted it and started going to a demon therapist who was very nice to him.

Within a couple of months, Izuku has been feeling better about his physical appearance. He started going out alone and wasn’t afraid to do it either since he already knew his way around campus. He was slowly, but surely, building muscle mass in his body. He was starting to get attention from other witches and demons.

He became even more popular when he was flying around to have a faster flight time. He only has a singular wing. His schedule wasn’t the same but random because you asked him to have random times to hear and see how people were earning interest in him.

You wanted to avoid a confrontation happening when he was working on himself.

Due to earning muscle in his body and slowly becoming muscular. Some of his clothes are too tight. He stopped using those and didn’t want to bother you. He didn’t want to ask for new clothes until he ripped a pair of sweatpants when he bent down to grab a book from the bookshelf in the living room from the ground. The rip echoed through the living room, where you were studying at the table to look at him.

Without asking, you immediately took him to get new clothes and told him to put them in a bag to donate if he had any clothes that no longer fit him.

You even gave him an allowance to use if he wanted any food or clothes. Seeing how he would rather stay with clothes that fit him tight than ask to get new ones,

Continuation: The Final Part of the post (3/3)

[perseusannabeth]

Chapter 1

A/N: Hi everyone, and happy holidays! This is my contribution to the @acotargiftexchange for the lovely @talkfantasytome! I want to thank the organisers for this absolutely brilliant event. It's looking like this fic will be 3 chapters, so fingers crossed that the rest of the parts will come soon!

This has chef Cassian and writer Nesta, aka my favourite combo. I also have to warn you, as per usual, Cassian's Illyrian cooking is in fact how I cook as a south Asian person.

AO3 is currently down, so I won't be able to post this on there until later, but it will be added. In the meantime, I hope you enjoy this!

Summary: Cassian is deeply concerned about the fact that his neighbour cannot cook at all. He decides to start cooking for her to save her from an early death, and it becomes so much more.

Cassian had lived in his current apartment for a long enough time to know most of the people in the building. It wasn't a massive building, so it wasn't hard to run into people. The only person he hadn't run into was his neighbour, who had moved in 3 months ago. 

Thankfully, there were signs of life, like the post being checked, and he could hear the door opening and closing. The most concerning thing he noticed was that his new neighbour seemed friendly with the fast food delivery drivers. Cassian didn't like judging food choices because he knew that people around him already felt self-conscious when they talked about food. Being a chef meant people assumed he knew best, but he could easily teach people he was willing to learn. Still, his neighbour was concerning him a lot. They must be on their way to a heart attack with the amount of fast food they consumed, and from Cassian's observation, they sometimes got food at least once a day or more. But Cassian had never assumed his neighbour's eating habits would affect him.

"So, have you seen her around? It's been a few days, that's all, and I'm a little worried about her," said his delivery driver, Toby. 

"I'm sorry, I'm so tired right now that my brain barely functions. Please, can you repeat yourself?" 

"Nesta, your neighbour. She orders from us daily, but I've not had any deliveries for her for 3 days. I'm just a little worried about her, that's all," Toby said, blushing now. The poor guy couldn't be more than 20 years old. At 20 years old, Cassian can't imagine he would've had the guts to do what Toby was doing, so he had to hand it to the guy. 

"I'm sorry, I haven't heard from her," Cassian replied, unwilling to admit he'd never seen her before and had just learned her name from Toby. "I'll check on her though, don't worry," Cassian said, to both reassure the man and to get him to leave because, god damn it, his food was getting cold!

"Thanks, man, I really appreciate it. She seems nice, and she tips really well." Toby smiled. Cassian just nodded awkwardly and then waited for Toby to finally (finally) move from his door. 

Cassian practically inhaled his food because, yes, he had promised his delivery driver that he would check on his neighbour, but if he was going to check on a potentially dead person, he would not be doing it while he was hungry. Fuck that; he had been in the restaurant since 6am, and he had planned on eating and then collapsing in bed. Now he had to check on his potentially dead neighbour because the delivery boy liked her tips!

By the time he had finished his food, he had managed to work up some energy, mostly just the rage he had to check on his neighbour and delay his sleep. Still, before leaving his flat, he checked his attitude at the door because he didn't want to be rude. He was being neighbourly, even if he was tired. 

When he knocked on the door and didn't hear any movement on the other side of the door, he was suddenly wide awake. He had horrific visions of breaking the door down and finding a corpse as he knocked again, trying to delay the rescue mission playing out in his head. When the door flew open, Cassian nearly jumped out of his skin.

The lady in front of him looked pretty annoyed at him, especially as he gawped at her like an idiot. Her hair was pulled up in something that might have once been a bun but was now just a tangled mess. She was in a long t-shirt that had seen better days; it was stained and faded, and underneath, she wore leggings that were in a similar state. But somehow, despite all this and the deep bags under her eyes, she still was the most beautiful woman Cassian had ever seen. 

"Can I help you?" The woman said, giving him a quick once over. 

That snapped Cassian out of his trance. "Sorry, erm, I'm looking for someone called Nesta?" Cassian asked awkwardly.

The woman had gone from droll to actively suppressing a laugh. "Oh my god, did Emerie actually do it? Are you a male stripper?"

Cassian's eyes widened as he quickly stepped back to distance himself from the beautiful, crazy woman. "Woah, I have no idea who Emerie is. I'm flattered you think I could pass for a stripper, but I'm no magic Mike. I'm Cassian, and I'm your neighbour." Cassian said, pointing at the open door to his apartment.

'Oh," the woman said, now also looking awkward. 

"Look, I just need to know if you're Nesta and if you're alright. I ordered some food, and the delivery driver said he was worried because he hadn't heard from you in a few days," Cassian explained, not wanting to linger in awkward silence. 

The woman's face went bright red at that, so Cassian assumed that this was, in fact, the mysterious Nesta who tipped really well and ordered food every single day. "Listen, I'm assuming you're Cassian, the chef Mrs Culpepper mentioned. I can only imagine what you think of me since Toby felt chatty today. I'm gonna be honest with you, I can't cook. My friend said not to burn down the building, so I've not tried. Really, my takeaway habit is saving everyone, and as my neighbour, you should be grateful, so don't judge me,"

Cassian held his hands up in surrender. "I'm not judging. Just because I enjoy cooking doesn't mean I assume everyone will. I am, however, slightly concerned. Is that all you eat? That can't be good for your health," Cassian said, frowning as he calculated how expensive that must be and the calories. He wasn't the best with numbers, so he couldn't be sure, but he was pretty sure that was a bad time. 

"My friend said the same thing, so she batch-cooked me a few meals. I've got a deadline for work, so I've been even worse than usual, but that's why I haven't ordered any food. When it runs out, which will probably be tomorrow, I'll be back to ordering from Toby," she said with a shrug. 

"Okay, I said I'm not judging, but that sounds horrific. I can't let you carry on like that. I don't think my conscience can take it," Cassian said, looking at her wide-eyed. The way this woman was going, she'd be dead of a heart attack in no time.

"I'll be fine; you don't need to take pity on me," Nesta said defensively. 

"Listen, it's Nesta, right?" she nodded, eyeing him suspiciously now, which made him want to laugh. She hadn't been suspicious before, but now he was questioning her food intake; she was wary of him. "I get to take leftovers from my work. It's one of the perks, but there's sometimes a lot. I tend to bring them home and make myself something with whatever random stuff there is. It's way healthier than ordering out and helps me not waste food. It's a win-win situation for both of us, really." 

"So, you're basically offering to be my personal chef?" Nesta said, trying to figure out what the catch was. 

"Well, within reason. If there's anything you hate or won't eat, I'll consider it, and obviously, any allergies. And if you want something specific, I don't mind making that, too, as long as I have enough time to get the ingredients. And I don't really mind cooking; if I didn't love it, I wouldn't do it as my job." 

A silence lingered, and Cassian wondered if he had gone in too hard on the sales pitch. He wouldn't be shocked if she said no; it was a weird request from your neighbour, whom you'd only met. But there was something about this woman that made Cassian want to offer to cook for her outside of work. His friends knew he never shared his food, not when he was outside of work. He made traditional Illyrian dishes when he was at home. It was a way for him to stay connected with his culture and mother despite his distance. These recipes had been handed down through generations of his mother's family, but there was something private and intimate about them. But he would share them with his neighbour. 

"Are you even real?" Nesta said, staring at him in a bit of a daze. Then, she reached out and poked him in the cheek. "You feel real," she said as she continued poking his cheek.

"I- I think I'm real?" Cassian stuttered, really not sure how he should react. Cassian wasn't shy, but this woman was just something else. 

Clearly, his talking pulled her out of whatever daze she was in. "I'm so sorry; I've been working non-stop for my next deadline, so I'm losing my grip on reality right now," Nesta said, shaking her head to get rid of whatever weird thoughts were in her head. 

Cassian pulled his phone out of his pocket and handed it to her. "Add your number, and I'll text you so you have mine. Then, you can text me any allergies or anything you wouldn't eat. I'll probably just tell you some dishes I can make with the leftovers, and you can let me know what sounds good. Is that okay with you?" Cassian said.

Nesta nodded, handing his phone back with her number added. Cassian shot her a quick text and then put his phone away. "Thank you," Nesta said awkwardly. "You really don't need to do that, but I'm certainly not going to look a gift horse in the mouth," she said with a shrug and a quick smile. 

Cassian smiled back, said his goodbyes and went back to his apartment. As he shut his door, he took his neighbour in, who was watching him walk away with a contemplative look on her face. He shook his head, shutting his door. Cassian was doing a good deed for his hot neighbour, but he hoped and prayed that his friends wouldn't find out about it. 

With that, he quickly got ready for bed, practically collapsing into his bed. As he drifted off to sleep, he noticed that he was smiling and had been since he had said goodbye to his neighbour. 

***

Cassian had forgotten entirely about the events of the night before when he woke up in the morning. It was so surreal; it felt like a dream. It wasn't until he was getting ready for his morning run that he realised it was true. 

He had a strict no phones policy in the mornings, mainly because his doom-scrolling habit was an awful way to start the day. So until he was ready to leave the house, he wouldn't look at his phone. It had helped with his mental health a lot and made waking up for his job so much easier, too. 

Since he had the day off, he slept till 9, which was late for someone who left the house at 4am every day for work. When he finally looked at his phone, he froze for a second, because there was a message from his neighbour. 

Once he had processed that yesterday had, in fact, not been a dream, he quickly made a note of the things she didn't like (kale being called the devil's lettuce made him laugh way more than it should've); he had a quick glance in the fridge to see what he could make. He figured he would make a quick tuna and avocado sandwich for lunch, and then for dinner, he would make pasta. Both seemed reasonably safe first options for her meals. Then, he could also give her leftover pasta for lunch the next day. 

As he finally left and started his run, he realised this could be the perfect opportunity to work on some new recipes for the restaurant. He wanted to update the menu and add more traditional recipes, but he had been nervous to test them out on anyone. By the time he got to the point he turned back, he had a massive grin on his face. He whipped his phone out and sent Nesta a text. 

Cassian: I've just had an idea. How would you feel being my new taster for some experimental recipes?

Her reply was instant, which surprised him. 

Nesta: you're doing me a favour so if i can help then i'm good with that. Although idk if i'm the best taste tester since my own culinary skills start and end at cereal 

Cassian: All I need is your honest opinion, everyone else in my life is too biased.

Nesta: i'm not afraid of cutting a man down, so dw

Cassian laughed at her message, sending her a quick laughing emoji before he put his phone back to go back home. He was in a good mood and excited about cooking for someone new. Of course, he got to cook for new people at his job every day, but cooking for someone one-on-one was so different. He could get her reactions, and she would give him feedback. This wasn't just a faceless customer; it was his neighbour. 

When he had assembled the sandwich, he put it into a Tupperware box and then cleaned up the kitchen. Once he was done, he finally gave Nesta her sandwich, trying to ignore the excitement and nerves bubbling in his stomach as he knocked on her door. 

Nesta flung the door open with a massive smile on her face. "Well, hello there, neighbour," she said, wiggling her eyebrows at him. "What do you have for me?" Nesta said, looking at the box with excitement. 

"I've got a tuna and avocado sandwich with red onion and some homemade sriracha mayo," Cassian said, presenting her the food with a flourish.

Nesta didn't hesitate to open the box to have a look. "Oh wow, this looks so good, like one of those fancy coffee shop sandwiches which is really over-priced. Did you make the bread, too?" she asked, tapping the sourdough. 

"Oh nah, absolutely not; I'm not much of a bread maker; it's so faffy, but I love the smell of fresh bread. There's another chef in the restaurant who makes bread, but there's never any left, so this is just some supermarket bread."

"Oh, well, I thought you used leftovers," Nesta said with a frown. 

"I do, but I like to jazz them up, so I use things I have at home, too. Don't worry about it, though."

"Nah, absolutely not. I need to pay you for this if you're using your money to feed me. That's not fair on you!" she exclaimed. "I'm not a charity case."

"I don't think you are!" Cassian said, alarmed. "You're going to help me, remember. Maybe I'll develop a new menu for the restaurant."

"I still want to contribute to this because you're saving me a lot of money. Let me pay half towards your groceries at least," Nesta said sternly. 

"I- okay if you insist, but I feel bad taking your money," Cassian said awkwardly. 

"Well, that's too bad. Text me your bank details, and I'll transfer you the money, and if you don't, I'll just have to hunt you down and hurt you," she threatened. 

"You seem like a busy woman, so I'll try to avoid that happening," Cassian winced. Changing the subject, he asked, "So I never asked, but what do you do?" 

"Oh, I'm a writer!" Nesta said excitedly.

"Oh wow, that's amazing! What kind of stuff do you write? I've not had time to read in a while, but maybe I should start that up again."

Nesta's eyes widened at that. "Do not read my books. You're not the target audience, and frankly, I would probably have to avoid you if I knew you'd read them."

Cassian frowned at her, and then it dawned on him. "Oh my god, you write porn books!" he exclaimed. 

"They're romance books! Sometimes they might have some smut, but they're not porn!" she hissed. 

"Right, of course! Well, I'm gonna get going since you've probably got some sex scene left to right or something," Cassian said with a shit-eating grin. 

Nesta froze but then smirked. "Actually, I finished writing that last night after you left. You know, since you weren't the male stripper I was hoping for," she said before turning around and slamming the door in his face. He stood there gaping for a while before eventually shaking himself out of it. My god, that woman was something else. 

***

"Cassian bheta! It's been too long since you called me," his mother said as she answered the phone. He had decided to ring her while he cooked because it was the best way to cook. He couldn't help but smile at his mother calling him son in their native language. He loved his Illyrian culture; the fact his mother had taught him so much of it gave him such pride. 

"Mama, I called you 2 days ago, and I've been texting you too!" he protested with a smile as he diced onion. 

"But you're my baby, my bacha, you don't understand. One day, when you have your own children, then you'll understand," she loved saying that line. It was one of his favourites. Now, he was nearing 30 and not even close to being married. 

 He ignored her comment, knowing no good could come from delving into that subject. "Mama, I'm making Illyrian-style pasta for my neighbour right now."

"Ohh, is your neighbour Illyrian too? Rhys's mum told me that the lady who used to live across the road from her has a daughter in the city! Her name is-"

"Mama! Velaris is a big city; you know I won't run into every Illyrian here, so stop trying to match-make! My neighbour isn't Illyrian, but she said she's happy to try different things. I'm cooking for her because she can't cook for herself."

"She can't cook?" his mother said, sounding scandalised. 

"No, and let me tell you, how I met her was crazy."

He relayed the events of yesterday evening while he sauteed the onion in some ghee, diced up some bell peppers and drained the sweetcorn. After the onions started to go soft, he added the basaar, a mix of spices that Illyrians added to almost every dish.

"Well, it's a good thing you're here to look after this girl; the poor thing has been living off those takeaways; she's in desperate need of some good, home-cooked food!" his mother said the word takeaway like it was dirty. She had always been very strict about eating out when they were younger, telling him they could make it better at home. Only as he got older did he realise they probably couldn't afford to eat out for more than the occasional treat. 

"That's why I offered mama."

"That's because you're my good bacha," she said fondly. "What's this neighbour's name anyway? And what does she do?" she asked. 

Cassian smiled. Illyrian mothers could never resist fishing for gossip, even if it was people they didn't know. "Oh, her name is Nesta, and she said she's a romance writer."

His mother gasped, making him almost drop the pasta as he drained it. "Are you cooking for the famous writer, Nesta Archeron?" his mother asked, her excitement tangible. 

"I don't actually know her surname. Why?" he asked, suspicious. 

"Oh my god, Cassian!" her mother screamed, so excited that she didn't seem to mind busting her son's eardrums. "Cassian, that woman is my favourite author!"

His eyes widened at that. "Mama! I don't want to know if you read those books!" he said, taking deep breaths and trying to clear his mind of that information.

"Pfft, why? Those books are brilliant, and you're a grown man now, stop being a baby. There are no men in my life, but those fictional men are something else," his mother sounded breathless, which was just too disturbing to think about. 

"Mama! Stop, I'll be sick if you carry on, and then how can I feed your favourite author?"

His mother was outraged at that. "Listen here, you! She's writing her next book, so you better feed her well because I've been waiting for this book for a year."

"Geez, mama, I promise I will; now I have to go. I'll give it to her now while it's warm." He said, sprinkling cheese on the pasta he had put in the two Tupperware boxes for Nesta. His mother said her goodbyes because he needed to feed Nesta, not because he said he needed to go. She made it clear her loyalties lie with Nesta, which was concerning. 

He knocked on Nesta's door, and she came quickly this time. She eagerly handed him an empty box from lunch, which had been washed, and took the pasta. 

"I'm not sure if you know this, but I can smell when you're cooking things, so I've been able to smell this for a while, and I'm starving right now. This smells absolutely amazing, so if this is what Illyrian food is like, keep it coming," Nesta said, not taking her eyes off the pasta. 

"Well, this isn't Illyrian food; this is just pasta with an Illyrian twist on it, in all fairness, but I'll keep that in mind." Nesta nodded eagerly. "By the way, my mother wanted me to check. Are you the author, Nesta Archeron?"

Nesta looked up at that. "Yes, I am," she said slowly.

"Right, well, my mother is a big fan and said I need to feed you well so you can write your book because she's very excited. She's basically gonna disown me if I don't cook well for you," he laughed. 

Nesta smiled at that. "She sounds sweet. Let her know that you're doing an excellent job."

Cassian smiled back and returned to his apartment, giving her instructions about how she needed to eat the 2nd box for lunch tomorrow because he would be at work. Nesta thanked him profusely, licking her lips as she eyed the pasta. 

Cassian got out of there quickly after that because seeing Nesta lick her lips did something weird that he didn't want to think about. He had only met the woman yesterday, so whatever he felt, he would ignore it. 

He got a text as he dug into his own pasta while watching a modern family rerun on TV. 

Nesta: this might be the best pasta i've ever had omg you're a god!!!

Nesta: i would eat this for the rest of my life if i could

Cassian: It's not too spicy for you?

Nesta: nah, this is fine, the tomatoes calm it down. Idk if i'm strong enough to handle more than this tho, my tastebuds are probs dead with everything i eat 

Cassian: Lolll, noted

Cassian cleared his dishes and got into bed since he'd have an early night the next day. Before putting his phone away, he quickly googled his neighbour, and lo and behold, a list of her books came up. She was popular, and he had to admit, he was impressed. Her fans were practically rabid for her next book. It looked like a series, so he ordered the first book before he could think about it too deeply. 

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[mhsdatgo]

Coming from a Team Green stan, people using the term "bastards" to refer to Luke, Jace and Joff as if that was an excuse to hate them makes me fucking snort. Yes we know they're bastards, so what. It's what they've heard and been told all their life. If that is enough reason for you to think they deserve shit thrown on them then Imma need you to take off your Westerosi lord "they're born of lesser flesh" whore's best friend heart shaped sunglasses real quick and see them as actual characters because you sound no less blood purity obsessed than TB thinking that "Hightower blood" is enough reason to hate anything regarding Alicent's children.

To think that they aren't deserving of lands and titles is perfectly fine when you look at it from Westerosi people's point of view, but that's no reason to hate them at all? (This also applies to some TB stans who storm the posts of maybe a guy who's chilling reading a book and make it their LIFE MISSION to protect them like they're their mama anytime someone barely mentions it.)

One may find various reasons to like or dislike them. You may dislike Luke for slicing Aemond's eye and never feeling a shred of remorse about it, you may like Luke because you think he did what he thought was best in order to protect his brother (although they could've escaped to their mom the moment he was blinded by dirt, but at least they spared themselves a scolding for being up and about at 3 AM going for someone's throat with a real dagger).

You may dislike Jace because he picked after his mother's "who cares what others think we rule lmao" ass line. You may like Jace because when he said that, he was trying to uplift his little brother who was growing self-conscious about the way other lords and ladies were staring at him. It's understandable. They aren't 2D characters everyone must either love or hate.

If you really want someone to blame for how things turned out, why don't you blame Rhaenyra for thrusting them into failure and sending her 13 year old out knowing the Greens would've sought allegiances as well? I don't know, at least send someone who would've been able to outrun Aemond, idk. You call yourself Queen, girl. Choose someone else, that ain't my job. Why don't you blame Daemon for wanting to send kids as envoys when they've got no experience whatsoever and their dragons are literally just babies?

Remember they were never part of a war until their mother pushed them in. They weren't "thieves" for "stealing" Driftmark. Luke didn't even WANT Driftmark. They just wanted to beef with their uncles in peace for the love of God. That they grew up spoiled brats is another story, the apple doesn't fall too far from the tree.

Personally I don't love or hate Jace or Luke. We've been given wayyy too little scenes for them to look anything else other than Aemond's and Aegon's punching bags, respectively. Except for Jace who got me cheering and screaming for him when he was literally THE ONLY ONE WHO STOOD UP FOR RHAENYRA IN EP.10 but yeah, that was the end of it.

Find new reasons to like and dislike characters. Anything that doesn't involve sounding like an aryan race supporter, thank you.

[greenplumbboblover]

Happy almost new year!

Yesterday I posted that whole "Top 10 Tumblr posts" but while that was fun to see, I figured I'd go through things I felt was a great accomplishment of this year for me. And some new years resolutions ;)

Accomplishments of 2023:

I made a website!

I know it's tiny and that it's not really great (yet) for getting tons of views, but I do want to thank everyone (I actually typed out all the names but tumblr was being stupid and I couldn't post the post then :/) for either giving it a try or using it. Without you, it would've just been a floating idea with no purpose. :) Thank you so much for believing in it!

I created a new sims story!

Gone a bit back to my original Simblr roots and made a story! Chapter 1 had been in my screenshots folder for over 2 years now, but I was just self-conscious about sharing it. I'm glad I actually got to terms that the only way to know if people will like it, is by sharing it. :)

Came back to Tumblr fully again.

Over those 2 years I hadn't really been on Tumblr much. I'd post my mod posts and that was it. Truth be told, I didn't really have much motivation to do TS3 stuff anymore at that time. But I think in the end I forgot how fun it can be :) I know I suck at interacting with people, though my anxiety often gets the best of me, and I'm genuinely sorry about that! I'm hoping to change that next year with some help.

New Year's resolutions:

I know most people probably didn't get through the whole thing because I type a lot, but if you do, hey there :)

Making Simblr.cc feel more personalized

I feel like currently it feels very download-oriented, which I'd like to keep! But that vibe also seems to be around with the more picture - oriented things. So I just want to make part of that feel more Tumblr-ish where it's just your personalized space. :)

Starting to sell stickers (and such)!

I know, kind of clique thing that everyone seems to be doing now and then, but I have seriously been loving to draw a lot. Though, my creative outlet only seems motivated when I do something for someone/something. So I was hoping to not just sell stickers for SImblr.cc as a donation thing, but also to make some of my own. :)

Finishing LISISV

I never intended to make LISISV like those shows that have been around for 20 years and going on. :p I know most of you do, which I love! But I'm not sure if I will be able to, lol.

I was hoping to rewrite the entirety of "Elly" which I did YEARS ago as a wee 14 year old (till I think, like 16?) but that's all basically teenage cringe IMO :p The concept and the characters however I always adored. So who knows!

Figuring out what to do with Interests & Hobbies

I keep promising that I'll finish it "after this mod" and I honestly do open it up, work on it for a little bit but then I start working on a feature and it... just doesn't work with the mod? However, the more I do that, the more 'bland' the mod becomes. So I don't know what do with it anymore 😅 Anyone who knows please help!

Unless you are all okay with remnants of it, which I'm doing currently :)

Making this space mod I have been wanting to do for a while

Not many people know this about me but i'm a huge sci-fi nerd :p And I wondered how hard it would be to make this “colonizing the a planet” space mod in TS3. Though I know that most people probably wouldn't care about that, since TS3 is more about generational things and... not so much about those things. So, who knows.

I guess I just need to sit down with myself and get my shit together, honestly.

Attempting to actually talk to others.

I don't know how people do it... I honestly want to keep tap of everyone I follow but I get so exhausted, if not, my anxiety starts kicking in because "what if I say the wrong things?" It's not just a tumblr thing though, i've been like that since forever, and maybe should just reach out for help for it. I just don't know.

I just feel as of late that people put great effort into commenting on my things and I'm barely there for them. Yet, just know that I am there, that I do think of you, i'm just deleting my sentences over and over again and just giving up. I'm genuinely sorry about that.

Hopefully your year will be nice and may your wishes come true :

[kremlin]

you know, i don't do the super longform posts like i used to, i mean to say, i don't post them anymore, but i still do write looooong ass walls of text, they don't ever make it to my blog. idk. on re-read they all have a very distinctive, unmistakable smell of "bus stop crazy" to them, and even after fixing all the grammar mistakes & forgotten words & etc they graduate from nutcase scribblings to "manifesto"

all those posts go to pastebin, anonymously, and then on to reddit, which is a huge pain, i have to farm throwaway accounts for like a year, not posting at all, before i can post a pastebin link and not have it be spam filtered, just to gauge how accurate my self-assessment is. it doesn't work because nobody reads it, unlike this blog, where 5-6 people read it.

and even that isn't working due to a wild phenomenon. when you write about niche subjects unappetizing to a normal audience, it only really makes its way to the same freaks that you're already friends with. in my case, these are people i've spoken with at great length solely textually over the internet, for like, twenty fuckin years. it probably wouldn't surprise you to know that they can clock something i've written like eight sentences in. and this sucks, it defeats the purpose of trying to hide my Shame Posts from the world with anonymity, so let me tell you what i did.

i tried just, you know, making a conscious effort to write in the most unkremlin way possible, and the result was indifferentiable than something i wrote normally. like, didn't even fool them any longer than otherwise. sure. fine. i guess that isn't interesting. but i wasn't satisfied.

so i call in an owed favor to a buddy that has zero language skills, like, unless you are speaking to him and standing in front of him, every message, regardless of platform, will read like a business email, signature and all. total dingus. he's like 26 & perpetually on welfare, (like all elite programmers) but writes like he's your dad sending email with that fancy corporate-branded-outlooko client that auto-appends some long ass disclaimer to all your email. anyways, that's besides the point, i gave him something i wrote & asked him to rewrite it in his own voice. no dice. "this sounds like something kremlin wrote but he's doing some kind of joke i don't understand, or maybe he got hit in the head". fuck. so i write a WHOLE new thing, not even solely focused on some niche subject that auto-reduces the potential culprits to like 5 people, and i give his ass the broad strokes of what i wrote and asked him to flesh it out. only a marginal improvement. they still nailed me after just a bit more thinking.

so fuck it. i hit up "Gunther" which i don't have the right keys on my keyboard to type properly, there's two dots over the U. gunther is very clearly a german guy, which you can tell on account of him speaking German, and when you speak to him in english, he's all "wast ist das" and shit. so i try giving HIM the broad strokes and having him re-create it, which was an idea/concept he did not grasp fully or understand on account of us not really sharing a language exactly. guess what. it wasn't immediately recognized, at least, it took about an hour for them to deduce i was the author, and at this point i have given up, i have lost because these increasingly cartoon antics have become my signature, and i will never be able to escape the shame of my Weird Bad Writing. they even figured out it was gunther sort-of-ghostwriting it, since it didn't have the quirks of software translation & was sent using some fucking ISO/IEC charset that europeans prefer over utf-8, at least the ones i talk to, for completely unknown reasons. they try and explain it, and i can't figure out what they're talking about, not because i don't speak french & german but because i don't speak ÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈÈ

i will never -- and this is a solemn promise -- write in any other way than to bang out the whole thing in 1 hour, never organizing anything, never looking backwards even 2-3 words, never *ever* proofreading (i get someone else to do it for me with explicit instructions to only fix grammar & highlight completely incomprehensible gibberish that they couldn't decipher for my reluctant fixing). i will also never stop posting it.

[deusexmachinawitch]

Weekend Success Stories

Disregard what happened in this post, I want to make a list of all the things I manifested this weekend. Now that I slept for like 12 hours and processed things better, I really looked back about all the things I wanted to manifest besides SP and I really succeeded like A LOT of them.

☆ Free trip

The reason for my trip was that I wanted to attend the concert of a group of friends. These girls are some sort of "idols" in my country and they do concerts across the anime conventions or clubs in a city 6 hours from me. They sometimes come to my city but that's really rare. Because of several expenses regarding to my health, I didn't know if I could make it to this trip but I really wanted to go because one of the girls, who is now my friend, has been my inspiration and my oshi/bias for years. Her energy really inspired me to change for the better and become more bold since I was really timid and self-conscious of myself. So I promised her that I would always support her and encourage her like she did with me and we both would strive for our dreams and goals. At first I was afraid to go because of meeting SP, but my promise with her was stronger than that since she came before SP ever came to the picture. So I really wanted to see her and give her my support, also to show SP that his existence wasn't going to make me stop supporting her.

I affirmed hard that I wanted to see the concert no matter what and suddenly I started receiving money from small jobs I did and friends that owed me money, discounts on hotels and one of my roommate's friends being in that city the same weekend so he could drive from the hotel to the venue and then take me back home by car. My roommate, who is like my Mom, also gave money to his friend to make a stop during the roadtrip back so I could have dinner. He also sent me money to buy merch from the group with a note saying "Thank you for doing the groceries and cleaning before leaving, sorry for being a mess because of my depression. Enjoy your weekend". So it was really sweet. So basically, I barely spent on this trip.

☆ Desired Appearance (Looking quite young for my age, clear skin, weight loss disregard what I was going to eat that weekend, silky beautiful purple hair like my favorite anime character, free products)

One thing I already said is that I'm in adult age. I really don't look my age but I was starting to have a very tired appearance that made me insecure, especially the last months leading up to the breakup. I really hate seeing pictures of me from a few months ago because of the weight gain and tired appearance.

I kept affirming that I wanted to look like Senjougahara from Bakemonogatari since she has been my inspiration for the longest time. I wanted to have clear skin and very long healthy purple hair.

So my hair started looking pretty silky, it grew like INSANELY LONG in two months. My hairstylist actually came to visit me and did my hair for free because I helped her with her moving to a new place a few months ago and I got my hair dyed, treated and got free hair products.

Also, there was a huge makeup and skincare product sale and my friends gifted me stuff from the sale. I also got a free new outfit just for the trip for dirt cheap.

Not to mention, I kept getting invited to eat and I actually lost weight despite all I ate and also after measuring me, I lost some centimeters as well so I'm really happy about that!

☆ Everyone missing me and people noticing the glow up (+ someone actually gifting me the specific ribbons I actually wanted)

After the breakup, I actually disappeared from social networks and barely answered messages. I wanted to focus on my LoA journey that I went into stricter mental diets more and more. But I wanted everyone to miss me and care for me but also notice that I did this disappearance to have a better mindset and feel good in my skin.

After I arrived to the venue, everyone actually showered me with attention. My friends said that probably SP acted out like he did because I got all the attention on me, actually looked much better without him and he looked rough even though he was the one that broke up with me.

I received hugs and attention from everyone, including my SP's bias. Plus my bias hugged me a lot and took a lot of pictures of us and posted them on social media. Not to mention that we both look so pretty in the polaroids we took and I have a polaroid with my bias hugging me (suck that, mean SP).

Also, a girl whom I know from social media and kept seeing me in cons, came to hug me and said how much she missed me because I was an inspiration for everyone because I keep encouraging others even in my darkest times. She found out I was coming because people told her in secret that I was on my way and she came running to see me to tell me to not stop doing what I'm doing and to keep having a wonderful heart.

But the most shocking thing for me was that, I was doing @fleurlx's "Badass Alter Ego Challenge" to become the person who I wanted to become. I took note about the clothes and such, but one thing I wanted were a pair of black ribbon clips that were long but not too big to not look "cartoony", but I really couldn't find them anywhere. But suddenly this girl tells me she has a gift for me and it's the EXACT SAME RIBBONS I IMAGINED. She said to me that she always loved my purple hair and it was getting longer and longer, so she went to a store to find me a "welcome back" gift and felt drawn to these ribbons for some reason and hoped I liked them. I thanked her and wore them on the spot, she was really happy and stayed with me as well. Plus she shamelessly plugged my socials to everyone lol. Guess I have to come back, at least for people like her, I'll also take a lot of pictures with the ribbons, because she believed in me and gave me the final piece to be my alter ego, my best self... Which is not only the ribbons themselves, but the love of people who believed in me in my best and worst.

I was also randomly gifted a nail polisher and overnight hair rollers so I wouldn't ruin my long hair with a iron curler if I wanted to try having princess-like curls.

☆ Do something fun that weekend that could help me feel more powerful about my self-concept

I know this sounds abstract but I had a whole day off before the con, so I didn't know what to do. The thing is that, my hotel was very far from the main city but not far enough to not have public transportation. I decided to trust the Universe on the hotel it manifested to me because it was cheap and the area wasn't a dangerous one.

I did well on trusting the Universe, because there was a party for the anniversary of an arcade and I actually secretly help restore and fix arcades. So people who were aware of me but have never seen me in person (because they just bring the machines to the workshop and I just go in hours where no one's there), sent me an invitation when they were told by my roommate that I was actually like a 15 minutes walk from their arcade.

The thing is that they were shocked that I was actually a girl, that I was someone they have seen before at cons and someone quite well-known and that I was keeping this a secret. I actually told them that I appreciate my privacy and I prefer to be humble about my skills. I actually ended up helping them fix an arcade while being in a pretty dress then just hijacked the arcades I liked for myself, especially MaiMai.

I got flirted on by several people, got several new followers and kicked everyone's ass in MaiMai whenever someone challenged me. And related to the DR manifestation, everyone thought I was WAAAAAAY younger my actual age and that made me feel great.

I think the best comment I heard was "WTF, you're so cool and so pretty! I didn't know what to expect when I heard that the second technician of xxxxx was a shut-in that just ate snacks, played Splatoon and just listened to idol music in the workshop. No wonder you don't want everyone to see you, people would either try to flirt with you or harass you because gamers be like that". I'll take this to heart and continue being a shut-in, the main technician of the workshop actually protected my identity for the same reason this person stated after all (he's a childhood friend and protects me with his life).

☆ Small mean manifestations

Because SP was mean with everyone including myself, I manifested for his bias to not pay attention to him and for the weather to be suddenly rainy when he went back home so he has something to think about his behavior on his way home.

So his bias had to leave because she had to go do other things and IT DID RAIN AS SOON WE ALL HAD TO LEAVE. I was leaving by car so I had no problems, but I saw SP running to the train station without an umbrella.

While I still care about him and I want to revise him since I do love him, I wanted him to think about what he had done to everyone and how childish he was by being ignored then having to leave to his house by himself and in a hurry. I wanted the Universe to teach him a lesson so he grows up, especially because he really caused several scenes during the con with several people and disturbed people attending.

I also manifested for the group to not have any concerts til late Fall so he has nothing to do during the Summer and stays home to think about what he has done and actually the group announced the won't have more concerts til at least October. But I also manifested to be closer to my bias disregard that and she is talking to me more and making plans with me to livestream together or hang out during the Summer! In fact, she accepted the offer of performing a solo concert at my city at the arcade next to my workshop and my childhood friend told me he would actually close the place out for it to be a private live but prepare equipment to livestream it! She also told me to check matching clothes!

Long story short...

Affirm and persist and winning is my only option!

Plus, I don't care about what happened with SP anymore because I think the Universe did this to show him how much of a God I am, what he is missing and to make him realize his behavior. So I didn't have a loss! I only won!

Well, time will bring him to me for sure as a better person.

I also want to thank my roommate, my LoA buddy, my childhood friend, the amazing and friendly @loass-angel AI and a certain LoA coach from the Elysian Discord for supporting me during this weekend and enduring my spams lol.

Thank you all for reading!

[itcamefrombeneaththeblog]

Why Do I Have To Be Depressed For You To Care? - A Longpost Journaling/Rant

Today marks my 120 pounds lost. From 400 to 280.

One of the things that makes this journey I'm on hard is that I'm totally alone in it. Most of my life I have gone through alone. In 30 years I've had maybe 6 people I'd call close friends. 2 of them betrayed me horrifically. The other 4, well, Like I love them. But we're adults. We all live far away and I rarely see them. One is a mom, one is married to the love of his life, and the other two are far away.

As far as lovers go? Well when you're 400 pounds they're non-existent. The idea of someone loving you seems as probable as mystical fey creatures. Especially when you have a job as fucked up and hard as caregiving for your grandparents who have alzheimers, which I did from age 21 to 29. Nobody wants to be in your life when you go through that. I don't blame them, I didn't want to be in my life then either.

So it shouldn't be hard for me now should it? I mean I'm a fuckin' professional at being alone now. Aren't I? Is anyone ever? I'm as healthy as I've been in yeeears. I've lost 120 pounds. And I'm sitting here, in a chair, listening to the wind softly blow my curtains next me. I can hear my neighbors, the squealing of tires. It's very lonely. I'd love to have someone be like, great job babe, or something like that. Just a celebratory kiss would probably make the last ten years of my life worth it.

But here I am alone. And I'm not so much sad, as I'm just hit by the realization that I did this for myself. This person I dislike so much, I transformed them, me, into this new person. And I originally did it so I would be more attractive. Such a silly reason, but that's the truth. I started out trying to make myself more desireable and in the end I seem to have found myself. This should be a grand revelation, but it isn't. I still feel empty.

I dunno. There's desperate lonliness within me. And that's not attractive, but I feel like I really hate how we as a race of beings have normalized not caring about the lonely souls like me.

I'm no incel. I'm not a poor sad sack or a woe is me lame asshole whose sad all the time. But this blog often finds me being very sad and talking only about things that are dark and depressing.

And that's because depressing has got me a bunch of views, people commenting, and so many people have seen my work. Depression sells. Isn't that...wrong? Why do I need to be depressed for you to care? Why am I only interesting to you when I'm suffering?

Did you know I've made a bunch of positive and health conscious posts? Probably not because nobody seems to give two shits about them. But the suicide poems, the poem about being SA'd as a child, poems about death and heartache, they do *really* well.

Why have we normalized sadness? Why is it cool in these artistic spaces to be so destitute emotionally? I don't know. Part of me thinks these are rhetorical questions that can't be answered satisfyingly. Part of me considers it to be in that misery loves company vein.

Is there a point to this? Well if you read this far I hope so, so you didn't feel like you wasted your time. I hope my writing is interesting to you. The point I want to make is that I lost 120 fucking pounds. That is staggering. I lost a whole person. I should be jumping for joy with friends or a lover.

But I'm not. It's like I've been programmed, brainwashed into feeling morose all the time because I don't have this or that, but also because being morose and sad gets me the attention I so desperately crave. How fucked is that? I've conditioned myself into a state of self-destruction.

So...I guess my ultimate point is that we need way more love in this culture, as cliche as that sounds. Because I think a lot of this isolationist jag our generations are on suck. And I'm as much to blame as anyone. We need a radical shift in mood, otherwise how are we, the dreamers, ever going to influence the chamge we want to see, if we're not willing to chamge ourselves?

I want what I want. I want someone to give a shit. Just one.

And holy goddamn, that one person is harder to find apparently than 120 pounds is to lose. That is profoundly painful.

[aglitchysylveon]

I haven't posted in awhile so have some art of some new OCs.

These two are named Arache and Ellovie they're girlfriends, Arache is based off the jorogumō, the Japanese spider lady and also the typical drider monster, I do have an old drawing of her wearing a kimono. And Ellovie is a lamia.

Arache is extremely self-conscious about her appearance, especially her face. She doesn't want to show people her face because she knows it will scare them away and she doesn't want that. So even though she doesn't like it, she hides and obscures her face to others to prevent from showing her grotesque visage, using a face mask and sunglasses, the other little eyes are either hidden behind her hair or she says they're just.. Acne.

Ellovie however is the complete opposite, she is very proud of her body and face, everyone seems to like her and she doesn't exactly know why, she doesn't see it fair that people don't mind her, a snake monster slithering around but her girlfriend, a spider monster? That's too much. Ellovie wants to show Arachne that there are people out there who don't care how she looks she's still beautiful. She fell in love with her for that reason alone.

These are their parents, Estralen and Kral'zu are Arachne's parents and Gez'goruth and Ophidiophanthei (yes long name) or just Orphanthei are Ellovie's

Arachne's Parents:

Estralen is the daughter of Leviathan, she is very envious of other people and their beauty. Sometimes trying to take what they have to make herself feel like she's enough.

Kral'zu is a former spider king, until a hero from a local village managed to fight him off and slay him, causing him to die and go to Hell, he was a rather spiteful fellow and didn't like sharing his power he also views humans as pests, and now even more since he's dead. Kral'zu likely had a rivalry with the Lamia tribe, and Ophidiophanthei herself, before he and she both were slain by the same monster hunter. Probably even envied how prosperous her tribe was, till she died.

How Estralen and Kral'zu met was.. Well Kral'zu came to her, or.. She came to him when she was busy looking at other demons passing by and envying what they have, she noticed Kral'zu and instantly took interest in him. After awhile of watching him, she came to him and sparked a conversation, getting to know him better, at first she was envious of course, he was a king in his lifetime, he had a kingdom of spiders and spiderfolk hidden away deep in a forest called.. "The White Silk Forest" because the trees and everything were just covered in webs. And she just had this title of being this jealous mess. Kral'zu told her that she didn't have to be jealous, she has everything in the world, and he thinks she's enough. With those words, she had a flicker appear in her gut that told her "oh God this spider is ho-"/j, they then also got married.

Ellovie's Parents:

Gez'goruth is one of the high ranking overlords in Hell, and the famed "Demon of Wrath", he's now the ruler of the Wrath ring. Despite his fiery and harsh behavior he's actually a decent father. Just don't anger him, uhh he'll explode on you and prolly singe you to death.

Ophidiophanthei was a former leader of a Lamia tribe, half snake half woman creatures, they were a prosperous tribe for many years forming close bonds with one another, until the leader was slain, and died. She was then sent to Hell. Stricken with grief and anger she wouldn't be able to see her tribemates again, she was fueled with rage and sworn vengeance on the humans who killed her, and prolly her tribe too, she then found Gez'goruth and struck a deal with him. She'll serve him under his wing, and in return she wants power. He accepted it, after years of them working together she realized she has developed feelings for him, she loved the way he battled, the fury in the fight he displays, his passion and discipline. And he too, had the same feelings. They then got married.

[a-multilingual-dream]

Hello!

My name is Juliet. I recently finished my masters degree in sociolinguistics, and then moved to France to work for a travel company. I used my first three months of living in this new country and working full time to get settled in, but now I'm ready to get back to my language studies!

And what better place to get motivation than here ;)

Let me introduce the languages that i speak / want to speak:

🇩🇪 German 🇩🇪 (Native)

This is my mother tongue and i actually have a certificate to teach German as a foreign language - i love teaching it, so if anyone needs help, don't hesitate to contact me.

🇺🇲 English 🇺🇲 (C1 / C2)

I started learning English at 12 years old in high school, and later taught myself by reading English books and watching English tv shows. My master program was mostly in English and i actually wrote my thesis in English, so I'm pretty comfortable with the language.

🇨🇵 French 🇨🇵 (C1)

Oh French - my love and my enemy. I grew up next to the French border and starting learning it in 5th grade. I proceeded to do 2 student exchanges in France, spent a year as an au pair in Paris, later did my Erasmus semester in Paris and recently moved back to France. I love France, i love French - and the pressure is high to speak it fluently. This actually makes me pretty self-conscious when speaking it, which in turn makes me worse at it. By moving to France, i hope to really improve my language skills, especially my vocabulary.

🇮🇹 Italian 🇮🇹 (B1)

Italian is my favorite language in the world, and Italy is my favorite country in the world. I just love everything about it, which is why I decided to learn Italian a few years ago. I have been studying it on and off for about 4 years, a mix of beginner classes at my university and self study. After finishing my masters this spring, i spent the summer traveling through Italy and ended the trip with a 2 week language course in Torino, and it was absolutely amazing! I'm excited to keep learning and to hopefully go back to Italy many times :)

🇯🇵 Japanese 🇯🇵 (beginner)

I've been wanting to study Japanese for sooo long, i think it's been 5 years since i bought my first Japanese language book. 5 years later, do i speak any Japanese? Nope. I can read and write hiragana and katakana, quite a few kanji, and i know basic sentence structure. But that's it. I think it's soo interesting to learn all about a language that's completely different from all the languages i know, but that also makes it challenging to learn it all by myself. I had planned and booked a 6-week language course in Tokyo in the summer of 2020, and was soo excited that i cried when I booked it. Well, I cried even more when the whole trip got cancelled bc of COVID... After that i didn't really get back into studying it, although I'm still as interested in it as ever. So I've been thinking about trying out italki this year... I will try to make a decision about how to go forward with my Japanese study during January.

~Other~

If i had the time to study more languages (which at the moment i absolutely do not, but life is long) i would be interested in Chinese and Korean. After getting to know the basics of Japanese i find it really fascinating to learn a whole new writing system and a completely different grammar, and although I've had absolutely no connection to Asia so far in my life, i absolutely want to travel there and learn more about its numerous languages (which i know aren't just Japanese, Chinese and Korean 😉). It's just like there's a whole new world to explore there!

So that was my (not so short) introduction. I'll be looking for langblrs that post more or less about the languages I'm learning, so if anyone who studies any of my languages sees this post, don't hesitate to leave a like and I'll have a look at your account!

To be continued...

[catelyngrant]

2, 8, 10, 15 - for the writer asks! XD

2. How many fics did you work on this year? (They don’t have to be finished or published!) Oh man...I have notes and little bits of two paragraphs here, a page or five there, but most of those will never go anywhere and I'm sure I've forgotten most of those ideas already but for knowing that they're in the depths of my Google Drive.

I published 10 (which is way more than usual for me!) and I've worked on/started four that I feel committed to finishing and posting eventually, as well as one more that I'll either write in the next week or watch it disappear into the ether (pretty sure there's not gonna be an in-between option for this one). This has been a year of hyperfixation whiplash, which, combined with ADHD, has had me spiraling all over the place with ideas and then promptly getting distracted and losing the momentum.

8. Did you write for a new fandom or ship this year? You know, I didn't—this was actually the year of me returning to some very, very old roots! I've written and posted my first 24 fic since, Christ, idk...2006? And then my first BSG fic since 2011, my first Doctor Who fic since 2012, and my first Star Trek fic since 2013. I wasn't expecting this but it's been pretty wild and fun! The TNG cast reuniting on Picard and then having David and Catherine back as the Doctor and Donna on Doctor Who were extremely inspiring external factors, but BSG and 24 were basically whims. I signed up for a BSG exchange in honor of the 20 year anniversary because I thought it would be fun to dip my toes back in that pond and then absolutely panicked when I realized I had to actually write BSG fic in the year of 2023, and then I started the 24 fic during a rewatch awhile back and @starg8rocks reminded me of it a few months ago and inspired me to finish it.

So, in short: no new fandoms, but lots of old ones!

10. What fic made you feel the happiest to work on? I mean, the blood sacrifice (aka the Succession yacht vs. orca crack fic) was pretty entertaining to me personally. I'm also just having so many feelings about Doctor Who deciding that the 2023 message is "rest, recover, and reconnect with all of your friends". So, while it was quite bittersweet and partly the result of me actively rejecting the premise that Sarah Jane Smith is dead in-universe, it was mostly just lovely and cathartic to write what falls away is always and offer two characters I adore a soft, quiet moment of care and connection.

15. Rec a fic you wrote or posted in 2023. The two fics that I agonized over most this year were let your faith die, bring your wonder (BSG, Laura Roslin gen) and we even flew a little (Succession, post-s3 but pre-s4 Roman/Gerri). Between one being in an older fandom and being gen vs. shippy and the other being posted just before season four of Succession started and catapulted the entire fandom, me included, into a new era of fic, I'm not shocked that neither of them got as much love (comparatively) to others I posted this year, but I like them. They're both fics I'm a bit self-conscious about and felt unhappy with when I posted with but I think that's largely because they took so long and stressed me out more than anything else I wrote this year—I liked them more upon revisiting.

my fic from this year send me 2023 fic questions!