#i was getting hot coco for me and the kiddo
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depressedhatakekakashi · 2 years ago
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Please discard this question if it makes you uncomfortable but,
Your takes on the Naruto characters are so much fun to read, they're so unique and sometimes too relatable haha XD but they're also very intimidating to someone still figuring themselves out (me aa (⁠´⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠.̫⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠`⁠)). My question is, how did you grow to be comfortable enough to share them in public? And not just Naruto posts, do you have any tips on being more comfortable with oneself?
This is more about being vulnerable with yourself and your ideas then it is about Naruto, topics like these can be very burdensome, so if you don't feel like responding please don't. Wishing you a good day <3
Hchxuxz this is probably going to be a ling answer but i’ll try my best not to write you an essay.
First of all, it took me years to grow into being comfertable sharing my headcannons. When i first joined tumblr i was in the marvel fandom and it was very open ended but not really the best for feeling like you could be free with your headcanons.
I explored things like my own gender through the character of Hawkeye (Clint Barton, hence my AO3 name) and it was hard at times because in that fandom if people don’t like what you’re doing they say so and tbh there’s so many marvel fans that it’s overwhelming
But then I joined the star trek fandom. Because of the premise of star trek (diversity and tolérance) it was a lot more welcoming. People wanted to read about my trans McCoy headcannons and I got to read headcanons i hadn’t seen before (like Trans Uhura, Pan Spock, etc. Things i’d never thought of) and it really opened up my idea’s and allowed me to explore even more.
I didn’t stay in star trek fandom (even though i still adore star trek) because i just… didn’t have the creativity i wanted there. But it’s the fandom that really helped me open up and find comfirt
Not just fabdom helped me though. Space had a lot to do with me finding myself. I was lucky enough to live in other countries away from family, which gave me the freedom to explore who i really am and who i wanted to be. My husband and I were living in Israel when he first told me he was Bi and I told him that i thought I might be androgynous (my gender has changed since then as i found more comfort in myself, but it was a damn good starting point)
The big question though: how did I grow to be confertable enough to share my ideas
Marvel fandom helped me a lot with this. Even though i did leave the fandom, it was my first real experience with people getting mad at me for my takes and at first i let it get to me. I got genuinely upset.
Then when I started tompull away I realized i was letting it affect my real life. I was getting upset with my friends and my husband, and I wasn’t ok with that
I didn’t want to be that person
So i stepped back, took a breath, and thought ‘why do i care?’
I’ve been bullied my whole life for a variety of things. From being a ‘tomboy’ (gender non-confirming) to liking the wrong things (star trek and stargate fan in junior high and naruto fan in high school) to having shit spelling to just… being myself
I got tired of letting the bullies win and decided that I wasn’t going to do that anymore. Sure they could have their say and try and tear me down, but at the end of the day I have love and support and that’s what matters
I have an amazing husband
An amazing kiddo
My parents arn’t perfect but my mom will sure as shit fight anyone who try’s to call me ‘mom’ or ‘mommy’
I became comfertable sharing my reality and my headcannons simply because i stopped carinh about what others think. If they get downright rude and insulting i block them.
As you find yourself and search the world for your meaning and your reality, remmember this one very simple thing anon.
Other people matter, but their opinion’s stop mattering when they start tearing you down. No one has the right to tell you what your reality is. No one has the right to tell you how you should feel.
I found confidence because i realized other’s only tear you down to make themselves feel good. Stop letting them have that win. Stop giving then that confidence boost at the cost of your own confidence
You are amazing
You are beautiful
The world needs you as you are and as the person you are meant to be. Whoever that person is
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witch-oftheflowers · 6 months ago
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His mask yanked off the moment he got into his truck. Shoved into his duffle bag as he drove home.
Simon smiled a bit as he trudged inside the cottage home. The dead of night filled the house, along side his steps as he dropped the bag into his office. Peeling off his jacket and leaving his work boots inside. Knowing he had to clean them the next day.
His eyes shut for a second as he processed his month away. Knowing his kids and his wife missed him. Knowing he had multiple chances of not returning home.
He opened his eyes as he walked out his office. Locking it. Anna was getting to curious at her age. She was a teen by now. And her father was still going strong with his missions.
Johnny was curious for a young child. But still, he didn't wanna pry like his older sister. And the twins. They just knew Dad was cool.
As he walked down to his bedroom. Hearing sounds of soft breathing and little snores. Peering into the room. His eyes soften, a bit surprised even
His wife laid in the middle of the bed. But not alone. Anna was snuggled against her mom. Blonde curly locks sprayed out. Johnny besides them, his curls hiding his face. Lad was due for his haircut, probably was waiting for his pa to do it with him.And the twins squished everyone as they laid on top. Their hair longer from last time, curls starting to look just like their mum
He softly chuckled to himself as he head to the restroom. Taking a quick shower, wishing to rub off the gunk and dirt he carried for a month.
As he walked out. A pair of brown eyes stared at him. Anna.
Sitting up slightly, trying to not wake the bunch. Her blonde hair swaying as she waved.
"Wanna joke me for a drink munchkin?"
Anna nods as she crawled out the bed. Joining her papa as they snuck off to the kitchen. She sat at the kitchen island as her father made them both hot chocolate.
" 'Ow was mum?" He asked her as he put a load of whip cream on the cup. Sliding it over to Anna. She hums as she took a bite out of the whip cream. Licking some off her lips.
"Mums ok. Stayed busy with Luna." The now 15 year old said as she drank her cup.
Simon smiled a bit as he sipped his own coco. With a spike to it for his sake.
"Your siblings?" He leaned against the counter as Anna was thinking. She was looking more like him everyday. Even started acting like him more. Which he was scared of a tad, but as he noticed his wife was along side them. He had no reason to worry any of his kids would turn out like him.
His eye darted to her ear. Remembering the day she got shot. His eyes stiff as he had so much remorse for building a family in their lifestyle.
Anna tapped the island to get his attention.
"Pa you're spacing-"
"Yea... Sorry kiddo. Just I regret bringing you kids into 'his all" he admitted as Anna had been more curious about everything. Wanting to learn more about his life and his career. She knew more about it since that day she got shot. She became very observant. Maybe even more than she was before.
"Not yous or ma's fault. Remember I was a surprise" she teased her pa as he smiled a bit. Shaking his head at his own daughter comment.
"No you and your siblings, are all blessings Anna."
Anna giggled at her dad's words as she smiled
"Ey if it wasn't for me. You and ma would of never been 'ere." She said as her very British accent was coming out. Which he chuckled to as he smiled bigger.
"Just like your ma. Knock off the same block."
"Well your block too pa"
They quietly chuckled together as they smiled. She finished her cup as she stared at him
"Make another for me???" She begged with her big brown eyes as he sighs and nods his head
"Yes anythin' for you."
The two stayed up a bit longer. Having a bonding moment as they caught up on the month he was gone.
" 'Ows my tios?" She asked him as their eyes met. He sighs a bit as he looked down.
"They're fine. Gonna stop by 'his week to see you kids too." He stated as he looked to his daughter. Anna was getting tired as she yawned a bit.
"Don't you got school in the mornin'?" He asked her as she shook her head.
"Mmmmm no. We got a holiday week"
"Well yous still need sleep munch."
"But you came home..." She said as her eyes started to heave. Slowly shutting as her head swayed around.
"mmm nope. 'Ome on bed time for you." He said as he walked around. Leaving their mugs as he scooped her up into his arms. Knowing his daughter was taller now. She reached his shoulders. Even taller than her mother too.
He heaved her towards her room. Laying her down into her own large bed. Tucking her in as he gave her forehead a kiss
"Love ya munchkin.... You've done good." He spoke as he looked around her room. New posters, movie ones filled with action. Others of horror and some of her childhood. He sighs in content as he noticed the letter on her vanity.
Walking over he knew something was off.
Military seal on top. His blood ran cold as he sighs.
Bloody hell...
He grasped it as he flipped it over. Anna Riley. A small words of ' We're Interested' as he tossed it back down.
Walking back to his own room. His wife Ximena, up as she smiled. Already grabbing one of the kids as she was returning them to their bed.
"They do this everytime you leave..." She spoke softly as she walked by putting Johnny in his room. And he was no light child either.
Simon smiled as he was surprised by his wife's abilities to still carry so much. Years of training still in her body
As she returned and noticed the twins gone. As he was able to carry both out. She smiled to him as she giggled a bit
"Wow still can carry that much?" She asked softly as plop into their bed. Her hair spiraled around as she hums. Her curls framed around her as she met his gaze. Seeing him tired and worn.
He sighs a bit as he crawled over her. Letting himself plop on his plush wife. A giggle left her lips as she wrapped her arms around his large neck. Keeping him close as they snuggled up. Her legs barely could wrap around his waist, but as she did. Latching her ankles together as she let him doze off
"Just sleep soldier... You did good mi amor.. you came home..." She whispered into his ear. As soon after snores filled the room, making her stay up as she wished to make sure he was ok.
And the house became quiet again. Darkness seeping back in as everyone dozed off to dream land. Knowing their house was at peace for a moment.
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glacierruler · 2 years ago
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@teal-ninja2846 here's your gift for the @sanderssidesgiftxchange I hope you like it!
And a big thank you to @sandersarefamily for being my beta reader.
The Cabin in the Woods
CWs: gore, spiders,
wordcount: 4743
Summary: Virgil, Remus, and Janus live in a run down cabin in the woods. While gathering wood for the fireplace, they decide to split up, and Remus is attacked and hurt. Roman finds him, and brings him to the light sides residence. That's when Roman demands answers from the other two dark sides, and Virgil tells him about the cabin.
It was cozy and warm. He really didn’t want to leave. Especially not back to that rickety old house, the shadows were cold. He was lucky if the stove worked, and if the house didn’t lose more pieces throughout the day, but the beds were the worst. They had springs shoving out, in every which way, the mattresses looked like they were put together with nothing but rags, and there was no way to clean them without breaking the bed more. But they aren’t as bad as the moldy floor. None of his spider friends liked it there anyway. Neither did Remus, which would’ve been slightly surprising to someone who didn’t know Remus as well as he did. So yeah, Virgil really really didn’t want to go to that house. The house all the way out in the imagination, especially not after Roman got him the best hot chocolate. That would just dampen his mood more. And he really didn’t need that. Although, he was dampening his mood just thinking about it. Shaking his head to clear his mind, Virgil looked up at the sounds of footsteps. Patton had just come into the room. “Hey kiddo, just wanted to check in. Also it’s getting pretty dark out, do you want to stay the night in the guest room?” 
“Sure, just let me tell the others that I’ll be here.” With some hard concentration, Virgil links up to the neurons in Thomas’s brain, and goes down one specific path that’s sure to reach Janus. It takes a minute for the link to open, but as soon as it does he hears a voice in his head.
‘What on earth could you want this time? Before you ask, I’m not patching up the hole in your room, you can do it yourself, if you find the boards for it. The ones in the living room are for the fireplace, so that this Imagination winter chill doesn’t freeze us to death.’ 
‘Janus, I’m just here to tell you I’m staying the night in the mind palace again.’
‘Oh, alright, just make sure that you’re here tomorrow, we’re foraging for more wood again. And I need you to make sure that the giant spiders don’t eat us, like they tried last time you weren't here.’
‘Alright. I’ll be there, bye Janus.’
‘Bye Virgil.’
“So I’ve got to leave early tomorrow, for something that I promised the others I’d help with, but yeah, thanks for letting me sleep here tonight.” 
“Of course kiddo, just be careful on your way back. I don’t want you getting hurt in the imagination, those injuries take twice as long to heal from.”
“Alright Patton, I’ll be safe.” With that, Virgil yawns, tired and full from the hot coco in his system. Patton nods, heading up the stairs to go to bed. Virgil had only started getting up when Roman came down the stairs. 
“You going to bed already, stormy weather? I thought you’d stay up all night scrolling through that one website you like.” Roman stated, clearly taunting Virgil.
“Well unlike you, Romano, some of us have important things to do in the morning.” Immediately regretting what he said, Virgil started to backtrack, having only meant to go along with the teasing, and not actually hurting Roman. Clearly not having succeeded by the look on Roman’s face. “Ah, sorry, that wasn’t what I meant.”
“Then what did you mean, emo?” Understandably upset, there was a bite to his voice.
“Fu-uuudge,” Virgil quickly corrects himself, as he glances at Patton who’s still in the room, before starting to awkwardly ramble again. “I should’ve thought out my words before saying them, but what I meant to say was that I’ve got things to do that I need to be even more awake for, not that you don’t have things you need to be awake for, just-”
“Just stop. It’s… whatever at this point.” Roman sighs, as he turns around and slowly walks back up to his room. Not getting whatever it is he came down to get at this point. Virgil looks down at his fingers, and starts picking at his fingernails. 
“ I should’ve just said something about him and his need for beauty sleep,” Virgil grumbles to himself, upset that he’d said something so hurtful to someone he cared about. He looks up as he hears Patton sigh.
“Well kiddo, yeah, you shouldn’t have said what you did, but you didn’t mean it. And you tried to apologize, so it would probably be best if you just gave him time. And maybe a gift.”
“Yeah, that makes sense. I think I’m just going to head to bed now if that’s alright,” Virgil states, getting up carefully -to make sure he doesn’t spill the small bit of hot cocoa in his mug- and starting to head to the kitchen.
“Alright kiddo, I should head to bed soon too, don’t want to accidentally sleep through breakfast again!” With that Patton headed up the stairs and to his room. Leaving Virgil alone with his thoughts in the kitchen. Berating himself even more, Virgil heads up to the guest room.
As he gets comfortable, he thinks about the day that just happened. Overall it was good, he didn’t get hurt in the imagination surprisingly, he got to the ‘light sides’ house safely. Why do they call themselves the light sides? It’s not because they’re good and the ‘dark sides’ are bad, because all three of the ‘dark sides’ are proof that it’s not that. Maybe because of the darker aesthetic of them? That makes sense, but is it correct? Maybe, Virgil would have to ask them to be sure. But that would never happen, too much stress is put into it. While quieting his thoughts, he was lulled into a deep sleep. From the warmth of the bedroom, to the quietness going throughout. That, while usually would spur his anxious thoughts, with the hot chocolate from earlier, it just aided him in getting to sleep.
The next morning he woke up to Janus tugging at the neuron that connects to him. ‘GET UP!!! Do you know how annoying it is to wake you up in the mornings? You were supposed to be here an hour ago! We’re losing time to get logs, at this point we won’t have enough timber to get through the winter!’
‘A. I thought I was supposed to be the anxious one. B. We’ll have enough wood to keep a fire going through the winter. C. I’ll be there in a few minutes. You know, we could just ask to stay in the mind palace. It would make everything way easier. None of them would have to know.’
‘No. Too many questions. Just get over here, and Virgil, how many times do I have to tell you? The less they know the better.’
‘Got it. I will see you when I get there.’
‘Good.’
Virgil got up and stretched, immediately feeling pain. He had forgotten to unbind his spider legs, that he was hiding from the others. They were purple with black specks all over them and smooth and currently very very sore. He’d just have to unbind them while he was out looking for logs in the imagination. And he should probably get going soon. It’s a good thing he slept in his clothes.
As Virgil rushed towards the area of the woods that would have the most logs, he tripped. Over what looked like Remus’s limp body. “Remus! REMUS!” He shakes Remus, worried that his friend is dead, somehow. 
“HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!” Remus starts cackling. “I got you good, didn’t I?!”
“Oh shut up! That wasn’t funny!” Virgil all but screams at him, tears brimming in his eyes. He gets up and storms off, only to double over in pain. He’d forgotten to unbind his legs. After taking off his shirt, he takes off the piece of cloth that’s currently squishing his legs.
“That’s not good for you, you know. We don’t want them to squeeze hard enough that they go pop again. That took forever to heal.”
“You know what’s also not good for me? FRIENDS WHO PRETEND TO DIE ON ME FOR KICKS!!!”
That shut Remus up for a second. “You’re right, I’m sorry.” His voice sounded small. Meaning that he meant it.
Virgil breathes in and out for a minute. “Look, whatever, just don’t do it again. And tell me where J is and you’re forgiven.” 
“He’s about three miles east of here.”
“Good.” With that, Virgil picks Remus up off the snowy floor, by his green tentacles, and drags him along. After a few hours, they found Janus gathering wood, and joined him.
“Took you long enough. Now let’s get to work.” Janus stated, clearly annoyed that it took them so long to get there.
“Are you sure you’re going to be strong enough to pick up with that many layers on?” Virgil said, clearly taking a jab at Janus. He got a log thrown at him for that. “Ow, okay okay!” With that they got to gathering enough wood for fire throughout the winter.
“It’s gonna snow soon.” Remus stated, as he had a good sense of the weather in the imagination.
“How soon?” Janus asked, eyes darkening.
“Within the next few days, maybe as soon as tomorrow, but today should be okay.” 
“Well, we need to gather all the firewood we need today. After that, we can gather wood, but if it’s soggy, we’ll need to dry it over the fire. Also no hoarding any wood, if your room is too cold, sleep in the living room. We can work on the floor in there tomorrow.” Both Virgil and Remus nod in agreement. Remembering the last time they didn’t have a fire throughout the winter. It wasn’t pretty.
“Let’s split up, we can gather more wood that way.” Virgil said, a little nervous about leaving his friends alone, but they can take care of themselves.
“Sounds like a plan, whoever has the most mangled limbs and logs wins!” Remus shouted, running off.
“You’d better come back in one piece! We don’t have the medical supplies to patch you up again!” Janus shouted after him. With that they all split up. While Virgil and Janus were mostly safe while collecting firewood, Remus wasn’t.
Remus and all of his octopus limbs had gone into the worst part of the imagination. The part of the imagination that he and Roman fought together in to keep at bay. But they also both went in it alone to prove themselves to the others. Well, they had just defeated the giant flubergrouch the other day. A flubergrouch is a mix of fears and creativity, making a strong blobby creature that takes a different shape each time. Anyways, they had just defeated the giant flubergrouch, so it should be safe, right? What could there possibly be to worry about? Well he was collecting wood when it attacked. A snapperbladdle got him, snapperbladdle’s being these kitten-like creatures, who like to eat your organs. While it won’t kill a side, it sure can do some damage. Remus turned around as he heard a noise, not quite realizing the danger he was in. As he saw the snapperbladdle, he turned and tried to block it with the wood he had in his hands, using his tentacles to find something on the floor to fight back with. But it was too late, it tore open Remus’s stomach and started pulling his guts out. The creative side was writhing in pain, screaming out for anyone to come save him. 
The snapperbladdle was feasting on the organs inside of Remus, as Remus kept writhing and screaming for help. As he was screaming, he started to lose his voice, and his consciousness. Remus blacked out because of the pain he was in.Thankfully there was someone who heard him, Roman. Roman who was also adventuring the most dangerous part of the imagination by himself. Slaying foes for fun.
Roman found him within ten minutes. Roman quickly cut the creature’s head off, picked Remus up, and ran back to the mind palace. “Come on, come on, come on, how could you go there alone, that was so reckless, what if this really messed you up. There’s a reason we’re only supposed to go in there together!” As he bursts inside the door he uses the neurons that connect to Virgil and Janus. ‘Come to the mind palace now, I need explanations!’ With that he cut the connection, and got inside the mind palace. “PATTON, I NEED YOU NOW!!!”
Rushing down the stairs, and almost tripping over himself, Patton shouted back, “What do you need kiddo!”
“Medical supplies!” Roman all but screamed. Patton raced over to the kitchen, grabbing the first aid kit that held more than just the first aid, and back to Roman.
“Oh no, kiddo, what happened to him?” Patton was applying first aid, and got the morphine and stitches out. “We’re going to need Logan to inject the bag of morphine into his arm, so give me a minute.”
“No need Patton, I started walking over here when Roman shouted your name. Now I understand you need assistance with the morphine, correct?”
“YES! Less talking, more injecting the meds so my brother doesn’t die!”
Logan walks over to where Remus is lying. “Your brother won’t die, it’s impossible for the sides to die in the imagination. I believe we can only die when our host dies.” As he says this, Virgil and Janus walk through the door, bundles of wood in their arms. They hadn’t had a chance to stop at their house before they got the message from Roman.
“What’s going on, what’s happening,” Virgil asks, starting to panic. It was his fault wasn’t it, he had suggested to split the group up. Sure nothing usually happens, but he should’ve known that Remus couldn’t stay out of trouble. What if he dies? Thankfully Roman grabs both of them and brings them to another room.
“Okay, I have a few questions that need answers now.” Roman growls out, clearly not in the best mood after finding his brother almost eaten to death. “1. Why was he in the most dangerous part of the imagination,” Roman gestures towards Remus, “2. What do you need all that wood for? 3. Why do you have spider legs and eyes Virgil?”
“Well Roman, I can answer all 3 of those questions for you,” Janus drawls out. “1. We don’t know what your brother was doing in the most dangerous part of the imagination. 2. None of your business. And 3. None. Of. Your. Business.” Emphasizing the last bit.
“No, I don’t want an answer from you, snake, I want an answer from Virgil.” Roman spits out the word snake like venom.
Before anything else could happen, Janus violently tugged on the neuron connecting to Virgil, giving Virgil a headache. ‘Don’t you dare tell him anything.’
‘Why not? They’re going to find out sooner or later, you didn’t take up my offer to ask to live with them. I’m sick of needing to gather firewood every winter to keep warm, and what’s the worst that can happen.’
‘I swear to Zeus, if you do that, I will-’
‘You will what? There’s nothing you can do to me, and I am so sick and tired of living in that pathetic excuse for a shack.’ Without another thought, Virgil closes the neuron link that he and Janus were communicating with, before turning to Roman. “Alright, so here are the answers to those questions you asked. 1. Like Janus said, we don’t know what he was doing there. We all split up to gather logs. 2. We need logs because we live in the worst shed in the imagination possible, and we need fire to keep us warm through the winter. 3. I was kind of just made with spider parts, so I don’t really know.” Roman huffed at the info, not completely focused on listening. He turns and goes back to his brother, Remus being the most important person in the room right now. It takes a few minutes, but Remus does wake up.
“How de grugglysplid did I geh here? Coulda sworn I wah lun munch for a snapperbladdle jus a few mints ago.” Remus exclaims, slurring his words a bit from just waking up, the snapperbladdle attack, and the lightheadedness he felt from being on morphine.
“Yeah, you were, until I saved you. WHAT ON EARTH WERE YOU DOING ALONE IN THERE!!!” Roman screamed at him, worry and anger clear in his voice. As he said that he reached to shake his brother, thankfully being stopped by Logan.
“Needs woohs.” Remus managed to mumble before passing out again.
“Ah, he should be waking up again in five to ten hours, he did have quite an ordeal. But why would he need wood? Can’t he just summon some?” Logan stated, very much confused as to what was happening. 
“The only wood he can summon is toxic to the lungs if you burn it, and we needed firewood.” Virgil clarified, feeling as though he’s about to be questioned again. 
“It’s because you live in that sorry excuse for a house, isn’t it?” Roman said, remembering what Virgil said earlier. “Why didn’t you just ask to live with us? You know we would be fine with it, right? I mean, we let you stay over all the time.”
“Uh-”
Before Virgil can answer Patton cuts him off, “KIDDO WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME YOU HAD HORRIBLE LIVING CONDITIONS!!!! How did we not know?! You come over here all the time, we should’ve suspected something was up!”
“It’s fine Patton, we didn’t really want you to know.” Virgil tries to calm him down, feeling bad for admitting anything to Roman.
“No, it’s not fine. You guys should have a grand place to live, somewhere amazing and wonderful, somewhere that feels like the comfort of a palace. Somewhere that feels like floating on clouds, like a paradise. Not some drab little hut in the middle of a forest. I know, you can live here!” Roman exclaims, getting excited at the idea of his last statement. Imagining all of them living together, in the same house. It would be great, so many more people for movie night. Sure, he had problems with 2 out of 3 of them on a good day, but he could put that aside for movie nights.
“Ooh, that’s a great idea kiddo!”
“Despite the many factual inaccuracies in Roman’s statement, you three living with us sounds like an overall excellent proposal,” Logan states, concerned for the three ‘dark’ sides in the living room. “Especially if your current residence is as uninhabitable as Roman is making it seem.”
“No, we’d prefer to have our own place. Separate from you, in order to avoid any major disagreements,” Janus respectfully declines, not wanting to be dependent on the other sides.
“We can’t let you go back to where you were living before, especially not if it’s as dreadful as it seems? Wait, we never really got a description of the place, could you please tell us. If it’s not that bad, and just a few holes here and there, I suppose that in the summertime I’d feel fine with you kiddos patching it up, and living there. But I don’t want you all to freeze to death this winter because of a broken hut!”
“Patton, they wouldn’t freeze to death, however you do have a point. It would be irresponsible to let you continue to try and patch up your home, especially during the winter time and without another place to inhabit while you’re doing so,” Logan expands upon Patton’s point, his eyes showing concern.
Virgil opens his mouth to say something, but is cut off again. This time by Janus. “While that is a nice sentiment and all, we are doing just fine on our own. And not to worry, it’s not that bad.”
“Riiiight, because moldy floors are safe to walk on, and are generally encouraged,” Virgil sarcastically says, having only said that to get on Janus’s nerves. Purposefully not paying attention to the shocked looks on the faces of the other sides in the room. “Anyways, Janus is right, we can deal with this ourselves, we don’t need any help. It’s annoying, sure, but we can deal.”
“Kiddo, that doesn’t sound safe.”
“I agree with Patton, it sounds horrendous. Why would you want to live there and not with us, in our grand palace of a home.” Roman says, absolutely baffled as to why someone would prefer to live in a moldy hut, rather than an elegant castle.
“Moldy floors could cause a multitude of health problems. It’s not safe for you to go back there. While this place isn’t a palace, like Roman seems to think it is, it is an overall secure place for you to live.” 
“No, we want our own space, plus it’s not unsalvageable.” Janus was quick to argue, not wanting to give up the small shack that he’s come to call home. Virgil on the other hand was debating on living with the light sides, after all he is over all the time anyways. In the end, he agreed with Janus. 
“The snake’s right, we need our own space, away from you guys. Not that you guys aren’t great, but if it’s our own space, we can do what we normally do without stepping on any toes.” As Virgil finishes saying that, Remus’s eyes open, and he’s finally awake. 
“Well snigliprop, what happened?” His words are surprisingly clear for someone who just woke up from immense pain and currently being injected with morphine. Everyone’s a little bit stunned to see him up so soon. 
“BROTHER!!!!!” Roman screams, tackling him. Having been absolutely worried for him. 
“If you’re going to kill me, at least make it gory!” 
“You mean like the snapperbladdle tried to do?”
“Yes, at least my guts would be going everywhere!” As both brothers go back and forth, everyone else breathes a sigh of relief. None of them believed Remus could die, or any of the sides for that matter, but it still scared them.
“Ah, there is something of importance that we should discuss with you too Remus. Why is it that you all want to live in a practically uninhabitable hut?” Logan asks, not entirely sure what else to say in the moment. And this was a matter of importance, so the question is fine.
“Oh, that’s easy peasy lemon queasy, Lolo! There’s just something charming about sleeping on moss! Also we want space to scream our hearts out, literally!” Remus smiles his chaotic grin, the other sides seeing a face full of fangs. 
“Then I propose a solution to this problem, we assist with the renovations of your place, and while doing so we have a campout in the woods!” Roman practically screamed, excited at the idea. No one wanted to shoot the idea down with the stars in Roman’s eyes. He was just glowing at the idea.
“Sure Princey, sounds like a great idea.”
“I suppossse, I shall agree with thisss idea, if it gets you off our backsss.” Janus was slightly elongating some of the s sounds, for dramatic effect.
“Oooh, we can all get tetanus!” Patton grimaced at Remus’s words, but nodded nonetheless.
“Sounds like a great idea kiddo! What do you think, Logan?”
And with the way all the sides were looking at him, how could Logan say no. “That sounds like a,” he takes out his flashcards, “superb idea. Making sure that the others have a suitable place to live is important.” With that, they all packed enough things to last a month, with Virgil, Remus, and Janus insisting they should bring more items, and started to trek through the imagination to the cabin.
When they got there, Roman, Patton, and Logan saw the state of the outside of the cabin, and immediately felt guilty. How could they let their comrades live in such a state? The windows were broken, some of them poorly boarded up. The roof looked like it was about to collapse, the door was barely connected to the house, almost all the hinges on it broken. The light sides decided that they wanted to look inside, and regretted it almost immediately. There was mold on the floor, with some of it climbing up to the ceiling, and the appliances were just horrible. The fireplace wasn't safe to use, the couches were pretty much just springs.
"How could anyone live like this?" Roman uttered out, perturbed at what he was seeing.
“Miserably.” Janus stated, having expected this reaction from the light sides. With that, they all walked back outside the house and started setting up the tents. They’d start the actual work on the cabin tomorrow, when everyone was rested up. Especially Roman, since he would be summoning everything he could to help fix this, and that would take up most of his energy with the amount of work that needed to be done.
The next morning, everything started up. Roman started conjuring the stuff they needed to clean the floors and walls, as that was the first thing they had agreed to work on. After that they worked on patching up the appliances, and then the walls and roof of the house itself. Throughout this they had little tidbits of conversations and encounters.
“Hey Patton, why aren’t you freaking out about my spider parts, I thought you were scared of them?” Virgil asked while he and Patton were dealing with the mold in his room, getting it all up.
“I may be scared of spiders kiddo, but I’m not scared of you. Plus you don’t look like a spider at all!” Virgil gave him a look, raising up his handy mold be gone thingy that Roman had given them, “well okay, maybe a little. The truth is kiddo, when you came in looking all spidery, we were more worried about Remus, so for some reason, it seemed a lot less unnerving than it usually would’ve been.” Virgil nodded, the explanation made sense. And to tell the truth, he was relieved that Patton didn’t freak out about it. They both went back to scraping up the mold after that.
A few days later Remus, Logan, and Janus were attacked by what used to be resting gloevorfolish while they were cleaning the kitchen area. Gloevorfolish are small, light grey, fish-like things with tiny legs. They somewhat resemble piranhas, and they like to bite ankles. After a while of getting their ankles bitten and fighting these things, they finally asked Roman for a fire extinguisher, as Remus had said that it was practically the only thing that got rid of them. Janus started hysterically laughing when it was over with, Remus joined in, and Logan couldn’t help but to crack a relieved smile.
Roman throughout this whole time had been summoning random things that the sides needed in order to get everything done. He had insisted he do some of the cleaning and repairing, but all of them had insisted that he use his energy to summon things. Especially when they got to the stage where they needed some of the bigger stuff. Like beds, drawers, dressers, doors, an oven, and more. And he was so exhausted when he had finished summoning stuff that he had no choice but to take a nap in the tent. However, every once in a while he snuck into the house to clean the mold, or repair the walls. It worked for a few minutes before he was told to go back and rest. However that wasn’t the only thing Roman did, he also went in to tell them to take breaks, as all of them had a habit of getting lost in the work and overexerting themselves. And he did convince them to let him help put the final pieces in place.
As they all put the final pieces in place, they got off the roof of the cabin and cheered, hugging each other and laughing. “The first thing we should do is watch a movie in here!” Roman exclaimed, ecstatic and exhausted. Everyone agreed, what better way to celebrate than a movie night. Proud of all their hard work, they gathered in the dark sides’ living room, and watched Mulan.
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ichigosatsuki · 2 years ago
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Would y'all be surprised if I told you I wrote this super long ago, like on December 25 of 2018?
I honestly just kept forgetting to post it but THIS TIME! I remembered thanks to the silly Smexy AU Sans Twitter poll!
So have a cute little silly story with everyone's favorite mew mew boy~ uwu
This short story was inspired by this video ⤵️
youtube
The video and audio belong to theRogue on YouTube!
The art belongs to bluehasablog!
----------------------------
It was finally that time of year again, Gyftmas! You found it curious yet surprising that even monsters had their own version of the Christmas holiday. Oddly enough, it was the one time where the edgy monsters in UnderFell became..well 'less edgy' so to say.
You were in the corner, leaning against a wall in the massive living room with a cup of warm coco in hand. It was refreshing to see the usual rough and tuff monsters all off guard and enjoying each other's company. You took a sip of the warm chocolatey goodness, noticing Sans coming over to greet you.
-
"Hey Sans!" "heh hey there kiddo~ you enjoying the party?" You smile and nod your head. Sans scratches at his chest "that's good but hey i was looking fer ya, i'd honestly didn't think you'd be here all alone by yaself" he muses curiously before flashing a toothy grin. "well maybe i could just use dat' to my advantage" your brows furrow slightly upon hearing his and took a cautious step back.
Sans notices your uneasiness then laughs "relax kiddo i ain't gunna do anything, besides i got something much.. 'sweeter' in mind. it's one of my favorites~" He held his pointer finger upwards which prompted you to look up. Upon doing so, you saw a small plant with three bright red berries tied on a string above you both.
-
Well those..certainly looked familiar.
-
"i'm sure ya know that those are kiddo" he purrs with a smirk "and ya know what that means? close your eyes and i'll give ya a little kiss~"
"H-heh..Sans no, I'm not gonna-"
"relax kid, i ain't gonna do nuthing to ya" he held up one hand while drawing an imaginary 'X' over his chest with the other.
"i cross my soul sweet-cheeks and if i actually DO sumething to ya. ya got the right to slap me deal?" Huh, well at least that seemed fair enough.
-
So you did what Sans instructed and shut your eyes. Though goosebumps crawled up your neck as you felt some hot breathy pants. Heat immediately grew on your cheeks, your now clenched fist ready to slap the skeleton at any moment.
-
"mwah~"
When your eyes opened it took a moment for your brain to register that he had given you a kiss on your flushed cheek. "heh you enjoyed that huh?" He couldn't help but tease upon seeing how red your face seem to be getting by the second.
It was surprising to say the least, since the monster was famous for pulling pranks and strangely enough. For once, Sans didn't try to do a said prank this time.
-
Sans gently took your chin to make you look at him "merry gyftmas sweetheart~" He purrs with a swift lick over his sharp teeth.
Without another word, Sans whistles a holiday related tune as he walked off.  You were left standing underneath the mistletoe with your hand to your cheek. You were grateful that Sans hadn't pulled anything.
-
Yet on the other hand...
-
You..actually felt kinda disappointed that the skeleton barely gave you an actual kiss.
....
"Gah, damn it! Sans needs to stop being such a freaking tease!!" You flusteredly grumbled to yourself. Keeping the cup close to your lips in hopes it would act as some shield to hide your blush.
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jellyfishloveletterghosts · 2 years ago
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Stommy hc! They both grew up as best friends and gave each other these cute little friendship bracelets. It’s just a simple leather band essentially but they both never take it off, even after their falling out, they both still make sure to wear it bc yeah they’re both mad at each other and may not wanna talk but they both still wanna be friends :// they also try and peep at each other’s wrists to make sure the other is wearing it
9 million year later and I finally posted the first part for this ask. Time is a funny thing, if you're still around anon hope you enjoy and thank you for the ask.
Bracelets Can Be Replaced Best Friends Can’t - Part 1- Never Take It Off
It is snowing out and school is canceled when Steve’s nanny drops him at Carol's house. She refuses to get out of the car with him unwilling to make the short walk through the snow drifts. Steve gets out reluctantly, going places alone is not his favorite thing and he walks slower than he might have otherwise with a manicured palm at his back. His feet are cold as he shuffles through the snow wind nipping at his nose and flurries getting caught in his lashes. The horn blares behind him and he jumps nearly tumbling over as he shoots a dirty look back at the car.
The door to the house opens, warm yellow light spilling over the snow lighting up the dark promise of another storm. "Stevie hurry up, it's cold out here!" Tommy calls from the door and Steve feels a little warmer all of a sudden, no one told him Tommy was going to be spending the day at Carol's too. Steve moves a little faster through the snow absently aware of the car pulling out as he makes his way up the stairs.
"Hey Tommy." Steve greets as he makes it inside and the door falls closed shutting out the cold but Steve is still cold, has snow melting on him starting to leak into his clothes and it makes him shake a little.
"Hey." Tommy buts their shoulders together before he starts helping Steve out of his winter attire. "Carol's still in bed but Mr. P said he'd make us some coco and breakfast, are you hungry?" Tommy asks, dragging Steve toward the kitchen without waiting for an answer.
"Hey kiddo." Mr. Perkins greets from the stove dropping a hand to Steve's shoulder and dragging him to stand by the hot stove. "You'll warm up faster here. Watch that gravy for me while I get what we need for coco. You still like extra marshmallows ya?" Steve's cheeks are flushed from more than the cold as he nods and turns to watch the pan, stirring the gravy occasionally as Mr. Perkins shuffles around the kitchen.
"What are you doing Tommy?" Steve asks with a quirk of his lips as Tommy drapes himself against his back, arms around his shoulders.
"Helping you get warm buddy." Tommy points out nose pressed into the back of Steve’s neck. Steve just smiles and goes back to focusing on the gravy. Mr. Perkins leaves him to it. Leaves him in charge of the milk on the stove too as he goes upstairs to wake Carol for breakfast and a few minutes later there is another set of arms around him, hands settling on his stomach as Carol presses to Tommy's back and starts complaining about being awake on a snow day.
Read the Rest on Ao3
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bisexualdumbassvampires · 2 years ago
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Hot coco and cuddles.
A HTTYD book series AU fanfiction.
On the lost island of tomorrow, that wasn’t so lost anymore, a storm was raging. The small village that had been built out of the ruins of Grimbeard The Ghastly’s kingdom was being battered by sheets of rain and howling wind, and inside a hut, laying in bed trying to sleep, was a little boy with a lot of skeleton tattoos.
The little boy (Who’s body wasn’t very little anymore) was tired, he was lonely, and he was scared.
He lay on his side, hugging his small plush dragon that his cousin had sewed for him to his chest. He was suckling the wooden pacifier his uncle had carved, trying to ignore the wind shrieking at him. A particularly savage gust rattled the hut. It sounded like a dragon’s roar and for a second Snotlout thought it was the Dragon Furious, back to get him. He let out a squeak that would have embarrassed him if had he been older, and ducked underneath his blankets. He buried his face in his plush and muttered to himself.
“I am a big boy, I am a strong big boy.”
He was Snotface Snotlout, heir to the throne of the Wilderwest, and he was a brave boy.
He was braver then the storm.
He waited until there was a lull in the wind, and then he threw back his covers and jumped out of bed. He ran out of his hut, pausing only to put on his boots, into the rain. He ran straight to Hiccup’s hut, clutching his dragon plush to his chest. The rain soaked through his shirt and ran down his face but he tried to shield the fuzzy little dragon from the worst of it.
He made it to Hiccup’s home and banged on the door hard.
“Hey! ‘Iccup! It’s me ‘Iccup, wake up!”
He lisped, hoping desperately that his younger cousin would hear him. Thankfully he did, and finally the door opened to reveal a very tired looking King Hiccup Horrendous Haddock |||.
His hair was plastered to one side of his face by his pillow and Snotlout would have laughed if he hadn’t been so cold and wet and little.
“Snotlout? What are you-? Oh buddy.”
Hiccup cut himself off when he saw the pacifier in Snotlout’s mouth and the rain splattered plush in his arms. If he had been physically able to he would have scooped the little boy up and carried him inside but unfortunately the boy king was quite a few feet shorter then his older cousin, and weighted about ninety pounds soaking wet. He quickly ushered Snotlout inside and shut the door.
“Kiddo you’re soaked, what are you doing in the rain?”
He sat the little boy by the fire and look off his dripping shirt and boots, covering him with a warm blanket. Snotlout gnawed on his pacifier for a second before mumbling a response around it.
“The storm was loud. Didn’t like it.”
His ordinarily deep, confident voice was light and lilting, unguarded.
He sounded young.
“Hey buddy, how old are you?”
Hiccup asked as he busied himself with finding a towel for Snotlout’s strawberry blonde mop of hair. Snotlout thought about for a second.
“Five.”
Hiccup paused in rubbing the little boy’s hair with the towel and blinked. Five was Snotlout’s youngest age, he rarely regressed that fair back unless he was really upset. Hiccup tried to look causal.
“Wow little star, that’s really little! Did something happen? Did you have a bad dream?”
Snotlout held out his dragon for Hiccup to dry and shook his head.
“No, wind scared me. Sounded like big roar.”
Hiccup’s heart melted and he tried hard not to show it. Snotlout got embarrassed when someone thought he was cute.
“Oh did it champ? Well, the storm can’t get you in here.”
He finished drying his cousin off and ruffled his newly fluffy hair.
“Do you want something nice to drink buddy? How about some hot coco?”
Snotlout looked up from his inspection of his plush and grinned around his pacifier.
“Yeah!”
He jumped up and hugged Hiccup tightly, crushing him to his chest.
Hiccup let out a quiet “Oof!” but quickly hugged the not-so-little boy back.
“Let’s get you some then bud, come on.”
Snotlout followed him to the small kitchen and promptly sat down on the floor to watch Hiccup make the coco.
He handed the first mug to Snotlout when it was finished.
“Careful, it’s hot! Do you want to sit by the fire or at the table?”
Snotlout took out his pacifier and put it on the floor. He took a small sip of coco and licked his lips thoughtfully.
He liked the cozy kitchen, even as a king his younger cousin preferred to live in a cozy small hut. But he was still a bit chilly.
“Fire, it’s warm!” He decided.
Hiccup laughed softly and helped Snotlout up off the floor.
“Alright little dragon, let’s go back to the fireplace.”
They sat together drinking their coco and watching the fire until Snotlout’s eyelids began to droop and he started to yawn.
Hiccup gently pulled his mug out of his hand and set it down on the hearth.
“Come on star, let’s get you to bed.”
Snotlout didn’t even protest, he was so tired.
Hiccup led him down to hall to his bedroom with one steadying hand on his back and another on his arm. He gently sat Snotlout on the bed and took his blanket off.
Snotlout swayed slightly, and rubbed at his eyes with a fist as Hiccup slipped a nightshirt over his head.
Toothless was sleeping on the other side of the bed so Hiccup had to wake him.
“Wha-wh-what’s the big idea?”
He grumbled, yawning and blowing smoke in Hiccup’s face.
“Stop that.” Hiccup whispered in dragonese.
“Snotlout is sleeping here tonight so you have to sleep on the foot of the bed.”
“What you sayin ‘Iccup?” Snotlout mummered.
He didn’t speak dragonese yet. Hiccup decided he would have to teach him.
“Never you mind little star, I’m just getting Toothless settled.”
Snotlout nodded and yawned.
“F-fine. But just because he’s cute like this. D-d-don’t tell him I said that!”
Toothless huffed and lay down at the foot of the bed.
“Thanks Toothless.”
Snotlout lay down as well and Hiccup tucked him in, placing his plush in his arms and laying down beside him. Toothless was already snoring softly, his little dragon body heating the room like a furnace.
Snotlout sighed contently and rested his head on Hiccup’s chest.
Hiccup’s heart melted again.
“Can I give you a kiss goodnight buddy?”
He whispered, scratching at the fuzzy stubble at Snotlout’s jaw.
Snotlout nodded and closed his eyes. He rarely excepted kisses, declaring them “Icky”, but he felt safe and warm and soft, and maybe a kiss could be okay, just once.
Hiccup brushed his hair back and kissed his forehead softly.
“I’m so proud of you for coming to me when you were scared. Goodnight little hero.”
Snotlout smiled around his pacifier.
“Goodnight ‘Iccup…”
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phoenix-king-ozai · 2 years ago
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Baby Shark Fire Fam AU
Ozai woke up in the middle of the night to a horrid sound. The dreadful tune of the song haunts his dreams and gives him dreadful nightmares. Its catchy yet unnerving melody irks him from sleep after a long day of tiring work and restless hours. He gets up from his bed and heads to the source of the discomfort in his living room...
Kiyi: BABY SHARK! DOO DOO DOO DOO! (X4)
Azula: MOMMY SHARK! DOO DOO DOO DOO! (X4)
Zuko: DADDY SHARK! DOO DOO DOO DOO! (X4)
Ursa: GRANDMA SHARK! DOO DOO DOO-
Ozai: CHILDREN ENOUGH...URSA WHAT THE HELL!!!!
Ursa: WATCH YOUR LANGUAGE AROUND OUR CHILDREN!!!! What is wrong with you?
Ozai: WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME!?! WHAT THE HECK ARE YOU DOING IT'S 8:00 PM! THE KIDS HAVE SCHOOL IN THE MORNING!
Ursa: The kids showed me a hot new song that all the cool parents are doing with their kiddos. I decided to check it out! Also, stop yelling! It's annoying.
Ozai: [Let's out a Fire Breath Roar] This whole stupid song and dance is annoying and needs to be put to an end!
Zuko, Azula, Kiyi: DADDY, NO PLEASE!!!!
Ursa: Very well then, we will quit... [Smirks] IF YOU JOIN US THIS LAST ROUND TONIGHT!
Ozai: [Glares] I WILL ASOLUTELY NOT, I HAVE SOME DIGNITY AS A GROWN ASS MAN! I AM NOT SOME CLOWN AND FOOL!
Ursa: [Glares] LANGUAGE! ...I'm willing for us to have some happy and fun adult time wrestling if you change your mind... for the kids.
Ozai: [Huffs and Pouts] The puss ain't W. O. R. T. H. I. T.
Ursa: [Let's out a Fire Breath Roar & Glares]: This puss was worth it three times so far!
Ozai: [Scoffs] FINE... but only for tonight and I won't like it!
Kiyi: Hey guys, what are mommy and daddy talking about?
Zuko: I heard mom mention wrestling. Apparently, Mom and Dad were pro wrestlers and were filmed and known for advanced positions back in the day.
Azula: [Sip her Coco-Cola can] Interesting...
Ozai: UGHH!!! GRANDPA SHARK DOO DOO DOO!!!!
Zuko is 8, Azula is 6, and Kiyi is 4.
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wish-i-wasnt-a-coward · 3 years ago
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The echoey hallway
a/n: quick note, this is 100% a rant fic. I have been upset by something and this is my way of getting it out. As it says in the warnings this is a description of a pretty intense panic attack, please don’t read if that would bother you <3333
Pairings: platonic or romantic Moceit, slightly toxic platonic lamp (not really their just oblivious) 
Warnings: panic attack, self deprecating thoughts, food, toxic mindsets, slight disassociation due to a panic attack, hurt/comfort, angst w/ a happy ending, feeling like a burden (mood ngl), violence mention, cursing 
Word count: 1,200
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Patton curled into himself. His arms wrapped around his chest as he sobbed violently. Heavy breathing filled his ears, forcing out any other sound. His entire face was slick with tears, glasses coated in the slime. 
He had tried so hard. 
Morality was responsible for taking care of the other sides, dark, light, whatever, they were all his kiddos. He had an obligation to them, of course it was an obligation that he loved! But that didn’t mean he was good at it.  
They had all been uncomfortable around each other since Janus’ acceptance. But Patton and his famILY were working on better communication and over the past few moths Janus had become a reluctant part of the group.  
Which was why Patton was so exited when Roman asked to take him to a show in the imagination. They were singing one of the new songs that Roman had worked so hard on and from what Patton had heard it was really good. 
So of course when the day of the performance arrived and Patton woke up in a blanket of misery. Even getting out of bed had been a hassle and by the time he managed to pull himself downstairs, the others were all awake. 
The mask had slipped on so easily at first. Patton smiled and joked his way through breakfast, making it as fast as he could to accommodate for the time he had wasted in bed. 
It was only when Roman reminded him of the day that he faltered. They had all looked at him in concern, Patton had felt sick, it wasn’t their job to care about his problems but he could barely function as it was. A trip to the imagination would be torture. 
Roman had looked so crushed. 
He left without eating anything. Virgil left quickly after to check on him. Good, at least Roman wasn’t alone. Logan went off to work barely glancing at Patton as he left. 
That was when Patton broke.
He made it halfway to his room before the attack hit him, he crumpled into the corner of the hallway. His sobs bounced the hallway as he cried alone. 
If only he wasn’t so fucked up, why did his family even put up with him? He couldn’t do his job right, he couldn’t be there for the others, he couldn’t do one. fucking. thing. without hurting someone else. 
He understood now why Virgil wanted to duck out. 
Virgil was wrong of course, they needed him. The emo could be gloomy, but he always did his best to protect the others and Thomas. He was an essential part of the group, Virgil knew that now. Patton on the other hand couldn’t take care of his family or steer Thomas in the right direction without hurting the person he was supposed to be helping. They would all be so much better without him.
Patton heaved as his breathing picked up. His whole body was shaking, he couldn’t breathe, he couldn’t see. 
Everything hurt, he hurt everything. 
Patton wasn’t sure how long he sat like this. Nothing felt real, he wasn’t even sure if he was still crying. Patton was sure this was how he was going to die, if it was maybe he deserved it. 
Something broke him out of his trance slightly, “-hear me?” a voice said through Patton breathing. it was barely a wispier to him but a jot of panic flowed through Patton’s veins. despite being barely coherent he was present enough to register that this was not a state he wanted anyone to see him in. 
The shaking side crawled away from the figure crouched in front of him. Patton pressed his back up to the wall, blinking his eyes open only to slam them closed again. Janus looked so worried, he shouldn’t be. It’s not his job to worry about Patton, it’s no one’s job. No one needs that kind of burden. 
“Patton,” Deceit said softly, “may I touch you?” he asked holding his bare hands up as non-threateningly as possible. 
Patton made a horrible choked noise but nodded. Janus sprung into action scooping the moral side into his arms and pulling them both into Patton’s room only a few yards away, as they walked Janus reminded Patton of the breathing exercise Virgil used in his moments of panic. 
He carefully placed the shaking side on a pile of pillows. Patton seemed to have calmed down a bit but he was far from better. 
Janus summoned two cups of hot-coco and placed them next to the fort. He sat quietly next to Patton who crawled into his lap holding onto Janus like a lifeline, Janus wrapped all six arms around the side. The two lay there for a few moments before Janus handed Patton his cup, the moral side took it numbly and held it to his chest. 
“Hey, darling” Janus began, “I know you’re still out of it but talking about it could get some of it off your chest,” he said softly. Patton let out a shaky breath, “I know” he murmured. “I don’t want to bother you” he mumbled into Janus’ chest, flinching when Jan inhaled sharply. 
“Why would you bother me Pat?” he asked tensely. “S’ not your job to take care of me”. Janus made a face, “Isn’t it?”. Patton shook his head, “Sweetheart, I’m self-preservation. It is exactly my job to take care of you” Patton made a noise but Janus continued, “It’s our job actually, everyone’s. And it’s not a job, more like a…”
“moral obligation?” Patton finished with a bitter laugh at the pun. “I was going to say that it was nicer than a job. Taking care of you isn’t a bad thing, just as you taking care of us isn’t a bad thing” Janus paused, “It’s not right?” 
“No! Of course not!” Patton cried, sitting up a little, “It’s my favorite thing about being a part of Thomas” Janus nodded smiling, “even though I’m not good at it, making you all happy makes me so happy” Janus’ smile evaporated, “what do you mean not good at it?” 
Patton looked a little embarrassed, “well ya know, I keep messing things up with Thomas and Roman-” Patton cut himself off with a sob. Janus pulled him back into an embrace sighing heavily. “Patton, I don’t know what happened with Roman but I am sure he will get over it. He loves you so much, we all do. I have no idea where you got the idea that you aren’t doing a good job. Even with Thomas, you’re learning. Adapting yourself to meet the needs of others as well as yourself is not an easy thing. But you’re doing a great job, I’m so sorry we haven’t told you that”
“Don’t be sorry” Patton mumbled still pressed against Janus’ chest. “I am and you can’t stop me,” Janus said smiling down at Patton who let out a tiny giggle, progress. 
“Do you want me to stay here or should I go beat up Roman?” Janus asked seriously. “Stay” Patton yawned, “And no violence”. Janus’ expression was so ridiculously soft, “of course dear heart. No violence, just threats” Patton hummed, “we’ll get there” he murmured half asleep already. Janus laughed, “we will Pat, we will,” he said brushing his fingers through Patton’s curls. 
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tokillamockingbird427 · 3 years ago
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I’m assuming you will be able to guess what ship I’m going with. BUTTTT numbers 1,10,12, and 27 the ship thingy. 😂
(If you were unsure about the ship it’s Logan’s sun Keegan lmao)
1) [How do they fall asleep? Wake up? Any daily rituals?]
To wind down before bed they usually watch Tv shows or a movie. Then both of them head to the room. I say that because they don't go down at the same time unless they're both exhausted. Logan actually lays down and Keegan usually reads or does some work before coming to bed. Sometimes Logan is asleep by then, sometimes not.
Logan is an octopus, meaning he just grabs the nearest thing and cuddles it. Keegan finds it very amusing to just pat Logan so he'll grab him (Still completely asleep.) and drag him down to bed.
Some nights are rough. They've both woken up to nightmares several times in the past. The contingency plan is hot coco, cuddles, and in the most dire cases, calling friends for reassurance.
If they do sleep till morning, Keegan is the one to wake up first. He makes coffee and wakes Logan up so he can shower while Keegan makes breakfast. Afterwards they do the dishes together then go out to do whatever the hell they're doing that day. If they can they do lunch together. And obviously at the end of the day they do dinner together.
10) [Who drives? Cooks? Does the handiwork? Cleans? Pays the bills? Handles the public?]
They take turns driving, though more often than not it's Logan. (Flashbacks to the stadium.)
Keegan adores cooking, Logan helps, but the kitchen is pretty much Keegans territory. (*Chanting* Housewife Keegan! Housewife Keegan!)
Both of them suck at sewing/knitting. They outsource it to anyone else, most of the time Hesh or Kick.
Logan is freaky neat, and Keegan would help, but most of the time there's nothing to clean because Logan is a bit of a germaphobe.
Both of them pay the bills. It's not like they can't afford it.
I'm not 100% sure what this last part means, but if someone knocks it's Keegan who answers.
12) [Is there a wedding? What was the proposal like? Any kind of honeymoon?]
Yes I love this. Okay: Small wedding. They keep it to close family, and obviously Logan is a nervous wreck anyways. The ceremony itself is very brief. Hesh walks Logan up, Merrick walke Keegan. Riley is the most adorable ring bearer. They put the rings on each other, kiss, and boom party time bitches!
Logan proposed. He actually did it twice because the first time Keegan said no. The reason being is that Logan didn't do the "Will you marry me?" and more of a "I think this relationship could benefit from the tax cuts, what say ye?" Keegan, being the little princess he is demanded a proper one with the condition being he'd say yes only if it surprised him. He expected it to take a few tries. It did not. Middle of a firefight Logan yoinks out a ring, kneels down, and asks Keegan to marry him. Keegan says no but Logan wins based on a technicality: Keegan was surprised by the timing.
("Will you marry me?!" Explosion "What?! NO!" "AHA! You were surprised! You have to say yes!")
Honeymoon they go out to the Walker cabin. (Elias bought it before shit went to hell and left it to Logan Hesh in his will.) It's up north, Washington state. Logan gets to take Keegan surfing, Keegan teaches Logan how to ice skate, it's a great time.
27) [Do they have kids? Grow old together? Split up?]
They have several kids! (I made a post on this before actually.) Logan's very skittish at the idea at first, but Keegan eventually gets him warmed up to the idea. Lot of kiddos pass through and they're all very cute and happy.
I have no clue what their future might be like. Logan was born in raised to join and serve: he can't see a life outside that. Keegan will probably retire before him and start a vegetable garden or raise chickens in their backyard, maybe both, who knows.
They are ride or die. Literally. The only scenario they "Split up" in is one of them dying.
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dragonseattofu · 3 years ago
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NekuShiki question time! #2 :)
Who said "I love you" first? When?
Do they ever go dancing? How does it go?
Who is more affectionate with the other?
First I love you
The person who I envision to say the first “I love you” in the post-NEO world would be Neku. Pre-NEO I would hands down have thought it would be Shiki, because out of the two I feel like Neku’s more of an awkward sort and wouldn’t know how to put romantic feelings into words. But after NEO I feel like Neku became a little better at conveying his feelings and here’s why:
He watched her exit the elevator. She was talking to someone holding a camera bag, possibly the photographer she had just hired a couple of days ago. He remembered their evening meal yesterday, one he had to pry her away from her work to partake in, relating to her upcoming photoshoot. He learned their usual photographer had double booked and she had to scramble to find a replacement. The replacement looked young, around their age, and seemed to be bowing a goodbye to her before walking towards the exit behind him.
Neku continued to watch her, as she pulled out her phone from her Mr. Mew purse. Shiki tapped furiously at the screen, with speed rivaling Nagi, and seconds later he felt a buzz in his pocket.
After tucking her phone back away, Shiki moved toward the turnstiles situated near the door and finally saw him. It took her a second to overcome the surprise, he didn’t tell her that he was coming to pick her up, but she immediately brightened as she walked toward him at a steadfast pace.
How many days, months, years had he waited and hoped for to see a sight like this? To feel like this? Like his chest tightening in anticipation of her being in his arms, his cheeks warming at her smiling at him for simply … existing? How long had he spent thinking about the life he could have had with his friends, with her?
When Neku was dropped into the Shinjuku UG, he went into shock. Why? Why was he back when he was banned from ever playing the game again? He had just gotten his life back. He finally didn’t feel so alone in the vast seas of Shibuya.
But then he got shot … again.
His cynical side thought, maybe this was his retribution. He didn’t deserve friends, not after what he did to him…
But then he remembered them, and what they had all said to him.
“Let me in! Tell me what you're thinking!”
“Give up on yourself, and you give up on the world.”
“You're not my partner anymore man, you're... my friend. So trus' that yo!”
Come on, work with us. A problem shared is a problem halved!
And then he could have sworn he heard her…
“You finally came back to us … I knew you would.”
“I’m so happy you're back, Neku.”
He didn’t remember her saying that to him, but it wasn’t the first time he felt like he saw things that haven’t happened yet, things that could happen if he played his cards right. Visions of a future that gave him some … hope.
Every battle he fought, every new area he stumbled into, every floating thought he passed, all led to this hope that he would get back to his friends.
When he wasn’t fighting to survive, or when Coco was standing watch so he could rest, he thought about them. Was Beat skipping classes still? Was Rhyme learning how to do those ollies Beat was trying to teach her. Was Shiki … was Shiki hanging out with Eri right now? Was she fixing a stitch on Mr. Mew? Did she miss him, the same way he missed her?
His time in the RG after playing three weeks in the reapers game was short, but nothing less than wonderful. Shiki and Neku went on a couple outings together, just the two of them when the Bito siblings had family errands. It started out a little awkward, especially when familiar restaurant and store keepers thought they were an item already. A specific ramen owner was the worst of them all even though his teasing came from a place of fondness for the pair.
Without him realizing, being with Shiki was almost as natural as breathing, and every moment he spent with her was fun, interesting, precious to him.
Neku didn’t get the time he needed to work out how important Shiki was to him before being plunged into the Shinjuku UG, but three years of company to only the disembodied thoughts of lost souls and an occasional “fairy” reaper gave him the opportunity to delve into it. The conclusion he reached gave him the motivation to keep fighting, to keep surviving. For once, he had someone worth living for.
“Earth to Neku?” Shiki waved her hands in front of his face.
He blinked, bringing himself back to the present. Shiki stood on her toes, trying to look at his face underneath his overgrown bangs. He felt her touch his cheek, concern marring her adorable face.
He hates that he brought so much strain to her life. Maybe she could have been happier with someone else, someone who wouldn’t break their promise to go shopping the next day and abruptly disappear.
But then she smiled at him, having noticed that he simply zoned out. And all of a sudden his negativity stopped spiralling and he felt grounded again. He may not feel like he deserved her, but she chose him nonetheless.
She chose to never give up on him, that he would survive the ordeal he was thrust into. She chose to be the best version of herself that she could be while she waited for him.
And then even after all that time had passed, she still chose to be with him.
Neku didn’t know if there was a word that encompassed the overwhelming emotion he felt whenever he thought of Shiki. One certainly felt close enough though.
“Hey Shiki?” He asked, putting his larger hand over her smaller one that lingered on his cheek.
“Hmm?”
“I love you.”
He couldn’t remember the last time he said that to anyone, if he did at all. Even though Neku had told Shiki almost immediately after his arrival in the RG that he wanted to be more than friends, he hadn’t used that word before. Love was still such a foreign concept that he wasn’t sure he understood it completely, but if there was anyone in the whole world he could associate love with, it would be Shiki.
Shiki’s hand on his face stiffened at the sudden confession. For a hot second, maybe it wasn’t the time or place she expected him to say it. He felt a slight panic from the doubt of her not reciprocating his feelings.
But those thoughts were quickly thrown out when she leaned in and kissed him.
It was a kiss longer than they had ever shared before. She was physically telling him something, but he was a little preoccupied to fully process anything. Shiki pulled away, far quicker than Neku would have liked, carrying the sweetest grin he ever saw on her.
“I love you too, Neku.”
Dancing
Shiki would have this fancy company dinner that she’d have to go to for networking. As friendly as Shiki is, she’s still introverted and the whole event just sounds utterly exhausting. Neku would be her plus one, because even if that’s the last place he would rather be, he’s her partner, and that’s that. She gets well enough along with everyone, but she has to make the rounds and greet everybody, leaving Neku alone at times. Thankfully Eri’s also there, and the girls take turns between networking and keeping Neku company. He surprises both of them when the head designer for Jupes notices Neku’s deep purple button down shirt from Jupes under a Gatto Nero’s half grey plaid - half black solid blazer (it’s visually better in my head than what I just described), and wants to talk to the designer of the jacket. Neku goes full endorsing mode for his girlfriend, and smiles smug when the girls realize they didn’t need to worry about him, much less securing a major deal with a major brand for a collaboration. He’s pretty happy with himself when he hears a version of Someday play on the surround sound. The dance floor opens up, and a couple of people start a waltz.
Neku thinks to himself, it’s an odd thing to have a dance in the middle of a company dinner, but dinners in the fashion industry are often hosted by the most eccentric of people, and he supposes it’s not so peculiar after all.
The melody plays soft and slow, and if he’s honest with himself, it’s a pretty good rendition of one of his favorite songs. He sees Shiki from the corner of his eye, silently asking her to dance as he extends his hand out. She’s surprised at the gesture. Neku’s many things, but dancer’s not one of them. The exaggerated kicks he’s so fond of are sort of hard to move elegantly in. A simple slow dance, he thinks, is enough for him to handle. Her thin finger slipped effortlessly into his hand.
More affectionate
Post-NEO, I feel that both are pretty affectionate toward one another, but in different ways. Shiki’s more physically affectionate, she’s more of a hugger and is always holding his hand, or his clothes, just so she can feel that he’s there. He doesn’t initiate physical touch as often as she does, but he never let’s go, or moves away from it. This happens more naturally as they start dating, snuggles and such.
Neku’s more affectionate verbally. He’s gotten comfortable saying what’s on his mind more often. He’s not shy about complimenting her, she doesn’t need his reassurances but his opinion is important to her nonetheless. He’s a natural flirt; says things that would be considered suave without intention. He would say pick up lines without realizing that they were pick up lines.
Okay, so I’m like not really sure how best to put my thoughts together but here goes:
The Shibuya and Twister kiddos would all be at some fashion function, and the Fret and Beat would comment on how attractive some of the models are. Neku would just be like, “yeah, they are attractive, but they aren’t as beautiful as Shiki.” Him referring to how much he loves her appearance as well as her personality, whereas he knows nothing about these girls so all he is going on is their looks.
And of course Shiki, who has pins in her mouth and is trying to get her models ready, hears this. Her jaw loosens and the pins fall on the floor. She’s essentially flushed and flabbergasted, by what he said and how nonchalant he said it. He looks at her like he said nothing wrong. Then he just smiles at her, and she just stutters out curse words. She doesn’t have time for this.
Notes: I’m so sorry for the late reply. I’m such a slow thinker and writer! But thanks again for the ask! The first prompt sort of snowballed. Hope you like it! @doesitringabell, I added a collection on Ao3 dedicated to you for any/all other prompts that end up longer than I had anticipated. Check out the source content.
Also sorry for any typos and such, let me know if you spot any. If anyone is still interested in my rambling mess of Neshiki fanfics/ficlets, don’t hesitate to send me more asks! It might take a while, but just know that my moments of silence are just me tinkering with ideas (writing something, hating it, revising it, writing again, rinse, repeat, then screw this, just take it.)
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thegirlwhowritesfics · 4 years ago
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Whose your Boss?
Please can I request Coco Cruz and “I am your superior and you will respect me.”. My guts telling me it’s more of a Bishop line, but I would die if Coco said that, thank you chick 💕💕
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Groaning I hit snooze on my alarm, for the third time this morning.
“Come on Alex, you can do this” I mutter trying to pep myself up.
Pulling the pillow over my face, I scream letting out all the pent up rage. I used to love my job at Romero brothers, but then Coco got injured and now we are trapped in a too hot office with his anger seeping into the air.
I push myself out of bed admitting defeat. Rushing through my morning routine I just make it to the yard in time.
Walking into the office I see Chucky has put on a fresh pot of coffee and I send a silent thanks into the universe. I pour myself a giant cup and switch on my PC waiting for it to boot up.
Coco walks in, not even looking in my direction, Angel trailing behind him.
“Hey kiddo” Angel says nodding in my direction “how's it going?”
“Peachy” my voice gravelly.
He cocks an eyebrow at me “rough night?” he retorts with a wink.
“Oh yeah I was screaming myself awake” I say with a smirk.
Coco’s face darkens as he shoves a run sheet into Angel’s hand “you’re already late, off ya go” he grunts before sitting down at his desk.
“See ya kiddo” Angel says, swaggering out of the office, sending me one last wink.
Shaking my head I smile “bye” I wave as he leaves.
I feel Coco’s eyes burning into me, turning to him I meet his gaze, his eyes dark and brooding, I feel a shiver go through me “good morning Coco”. He just grunts turning to his PC.
Rolling my eyes I turn back to my PC and start working on invoices.
Checking the time I see it's 1pm, and I haven’t eaten all day, pushing myself back from my desk I groan as all my joints crack, I notice Coco isn’t at his desk, I didn’t even notice he left, I grab my bag and head out to my car.
I drive into town and from the local diner I grab two cheeseburgers with fries and cokes and head back to the yard. I put one of the meals on Coco’s desk, he doesn’t even look up, rolling my eyes. I head back to mine, pigging in. looking over I notice Coco has demolished his burger in two bites. Putting mine down I take a sip of my coke.
“You know thank you Alex would be nice, or even a simple good morning every now and again” I tell him my voice crackling. Unsure if it's from being upset or from this morning.
Coco pushes himself up from his desk, and starts to head towards the door.
“I don’t fucking think so” I yell jumping up and moving in front of him, my body blocking the door ready to unleash my rage on Coco.
“What the fuck is your problem with me?” I ask,  anger flushing my cheeks.
“Alex, I am your superior and you will show me some respect, now get out of my way” his voice harsh.
“Bullshit Coco, I get it, you are angry but I am not your emotional punching bag --” before I can finish Coco’s hands are on my face, his lips crushing mine. Every nerve in my body lights up like a christmas tree with pleasure.
Coco pushes me back against the wall as my hands slip into his hair, a soft moan escaping his lips.
“I far from hate you Alex” he murmurs.
Pushing my lips against his, the softness of mine against the roughness of his sending shivers down my spine.
“Yo Coco, you in there?” I hear Gilly yell out.
Groaning Coco pulls away from me, “yeah what's up?” he replies.
“Bish needs you” Gilly says entering the office.
“Alright, let's go,” he says, shooting me a I’m sorry look.
Biting my lip I just smile “see ya later boss” I murmur as he follows Gilly out the door.
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dalamjisung · 4 years ago
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play date ❁ choi youngjae
word count: 2197
genre: slice of life, fluff, dog dad!youngjae
member: youngjae x reader
description: there’s nothing to worry about, really– even though not much changed with the immediate transition to Sublime, Youngjae still made a point of making time for you and you guys’ daughter, Coco. And obviously, her uncles. He always makes time for the whole family. 
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“Y/N!”
Popping your head out of the shower, you frown, unsure if you actually heard your boyfriend or if you simply had a brain fart moment. Just as your shampoo starts to drip from your hair into your eyes, you hear it again.
“Y/N! Babe!”
“In the shower!” You call back, doing your best to stop the shampoo dripping down your face from getting into your eyes. You are too slow, though, and the sting has you yelping as you move to get yourself under the warm water, but once your feet falters and slips, there is nothing you can do.
Youngjae finds you in the bathroom naked and wet, hand caressing your behind as you wince in pain from the fall. You open the one eye that doesn’t hurt to see him hiding his laughter behind his hand, snorting slightly as he composes himself.
“Are you okay, love?”
“Sure,” You say, irony dripping from your voice. Grabbing your towel, Youngjae holds it open, embracing you with it once you are back on your feet. “Just peachy.”
His hands pat you down, drying your skin with all the care in the world. It’s been a while, since you two been able to be intimate– and you don’t mean sex, no; you mean emotional intimacy, the kind that shines brightest when it’s just you two, laying in bed, talking about your day while your hands draw shapes on each other; the kind that is so strong it can be suffocating for anyone else to witness as you two whisper to each other in the middle of movies, giggling and just feeling. With the GOT7 contract ending and the immediate transition into Sublime, Youngjae has barely had time to come home and shower, much less to sit with you and relax. So this– this moment of vulnerability and connection– even though it cost you an eye and a possibly broken hip… this is all you want.
“Are you okay?” You feel his lips moving on top of your hair and his fluttering kisses, on your forehead, your nose, your cheeks, you mouth. “Y/N?”
“Yeah, I’m fine,” You sigh, smiling. “I’m all better now.”
“Really?” He asks, and something about the low voices and murmuring conversation creates a sensation of home, in his arms, in your bathroom.
“Yeah…” You lay your head on his chest. “Just being here with you is–“
“Great!” And just like that, the mood is gone. “Get ready!”
A bit thrown off, you blink, trying to place yourself again. Chuckling, you follow him to your room, catching the clothes he throws at you.
“And where are we going, my love?” You ask softly, slowly getting dressed as you watch your boyfriend excitedly look at the door, almost as if he is expecting something.
And you hear the small pitter patter of her paws on the wooden floor before you see Coco coming in, looking her for loyal companion. Laughter bubbles up as you see her small frame covered by an even smaller red tutu dress.
“Why is Coco so dressed up?” You laugh, pulling a sweatshirt over your head. “She looks better than I do…”
“You both are beautiful in your own way,” Youngjae rolls his eyes, kissing your cheek as you pat your hair dry with the towel. “Are you almost ready?”
“I mean, sure,” You shrug, brushing your hair. “I still don’t know where we’re going, but I hope looking like a wet mess is not a problem.”
“Correction, you look like a hot mess,” He kisses you quickly, bending down to grab Coco and let her give you a few licks on the face. “And no, it is never a problem to look like a hot mess. Now, let’s go or else we’ll be late.”
“Late?” You mutter to yourself. “We have an appointment somewhere?”
“Not us,” Youngjae wiggles his brows, giving you the dog as he runs around grabbing jackets and phones. “Coco.”
“Coco?” You snuggle her closer to you, petting her head slowly. “Are we taking her to the vet? I remember her last visit, it wasn’t that long ago and–“
“She has a date,” He explains, opening the door to you. “On that one park next to the coffee shop you like.”
“And where did you find this date?” You chuckle. Youngjae’s devotion to Coco has always amused you; it is adorable how much he cares for the pet, and you are not embarrassed to admit that it is one of the many reasons you fell in love with him– his devotion to the those and what he loves.
“Secret,” He holds your hand, giving you a squeeze, before pulling you down the street.
“You hear that, Coco?” You tell the overly excited dog, much like your boyfriend. “Daddy is pimping you away.”
“Yah!” Youngjae’s eyes go wide, and incredulous laughter escaping his mouth. “Y/N, don’t say that!”
“But it’s okay, baby,” You continue, putting her down on the ground, leash secured. “Mommy would never let bad doggies get to you. It has to be a special doggie, one that will treat you well.”
“Babe,” Yugyeom whines, stomping his feet and you giggle at his adorable pout. You two are almost there, Coco guiding the way she knows oh too well by now. Whenever he had time away from work, Youngjae would make sure to walk Coco to the park every morning, stoping to get you coffee from your favorite shop. Then, once he’s back home, he’d wake you up with kisses and breakfast, and together, your small little family of three, would enjoy the morning as it passes by.
It still amazes you that you and Youngjae are able to discuss mundane things; the way his eyes sparkle when you tell him a new office gossip, or the way he tells you some previously forgotten secret that Jinyoung told him and promised not to tell anyone.
“Everyone knows,” He says, pulling you through the park’s gate and to the fountain. “That if I know, you know. It’s just how it works.”
“Definitely,” Your eyes glint in adoration as you watching him look around, standing on his tippy-toes as if the extra inch would make a difference. “Who are we–“
“Hyung!”
Yugyeom waves wildly from the other side of the fountain, and when you approach him, you finally notice the small dog with a tuxedo by his feet.
“What the hell are you two doing?” You sigh, snorting as Dalkyum waddles, still unfamiliar and uncomfortable with the outfit.
“What?” Yugyeom laughs as Coco moves to playfully bite his dog, both barking and running around once you let them free from their leashes.
The three of you sit on the grass, and you can’t help but observe Yugyeom as he moves around, shoulders relaxed and a small smile practically glued to his face.
“Take a picture, it lasts longer,” The youngest jokes, giggling as Youngjae wraps an arm around you to pull you to him.
“Don’t get smart with me, kiddo,” You flick his forehead. “You just seem different.”
“Different how?”
“Like you are finally your age.”
There is agreement in his silence, and you see the way his smile widens; he is happy. He is young and he finally can be young. After a while, he starts talking about a new dance routine he’s rehearsing.
“It’s really cool, noona, you’ll love it, seri–“
“Oh my god, Dalkyum no!”
Youngjae practically pushes you to the side when he notices Yugyeom’s dog mounting his precious Coco, running to pull her away. You can briefly hear him lecturing them both before coming back.
“You said this was a date!” You gasp, grabbing Coco away from him. “Let them date!”
“Date? Da– Y/N, they were having sex!” Youngjae cries out. “This is just their first date!”
“So?!” You laugh, letting Coco go back to Dalkyum. “We had sex on our first date and I don’t remember you complaining about it.”
“She’s got you, hyung,” Yugyeom whispers, holding his laughter in.
“That is our daughter!” Your boyfriend ignores the maknae and continues frowning. “I can’t–“
“Be free, Coco! Run to the love of your life and be happy,” Yugyeom screams, making both of you jump. You look back to see both your dogs running away and you can’t help but laugh at the indignant cry Yugyeom lets out.
“My baby!” His hands is stretched out, dramatically reaching out for his dog. “Y/N, how could you betray me like that?”
“I’m on Coco’s team,” You pat his hair as he lays his head on your shoulder. “Us women have to stick together.”
“Is that your way of telling us all to go fuck off?”
You look at Bambam, whom you’ve bee expecting for a while, since him and the other youngster could never last long when they’re apart. He is wearing Jackson’s new collection and, behind him, you can see the one and only sneaking some pictures of his friend. Jinyoung is not that far behind, pulling Mark and Jaebeom pas the ice cream cart; you chuckle as you hear the two grumbling in the background.
“Why is everyone here?” You ask Youngjae, eyeing his suspiciously.
“We heard Coco and Dalkyum were getting married,” Jackson snorts, showing you the pictures sent to the groups chat. “We’ve been intimated to come and congratulate the new couple.”
“Married?” Yugyeom echoes, shock in his voice. “Yah, hyung, this is just their first date… marriage is a bit much, don’t you think?”
“Your dog was humping my baby not even ten minutes ago,” Youngjae seethes. “He better take responsibility now. Who knows if she’s pregnant?”
“Babe, that’s not how it works at–“
“What do you mean?!” Yugyeom shouts back, sitting up from where he was laying. “Coco gave him consent! It takes two to tango!”
“Guys, really, that’s not–“
“Yah, Kim Yugyeom!” Youngjae points at his dongsaeng.
You barely hear the end of that conversation, following Jinyoung as he pulls you aside.
“Ignore them,” He sighed, and even though he might try to look uninterested and bored, you always recognize the amused smile Jinyoung constantly displays. “They can go one forever.”
“Poor Coco,” You say, poking him with your elbow. “She just wants true love.”
“And she chooses Dalkyum?” Jinyoug snorts, rolling his eyes. “That dog is worse then his owner.”
“Excuse me?!”
You two look at Youngjae and Yugyeom, both staring at you with wide eyes.
“Dalkyum is not a bad boy!” Yugyeom insists, coming over to you.
“He’s is a dog!” Jackson tries to interfere.
“No he’s not, he is a gentleman!” Bambam says, hopefully helping his best friend.
“Coco deserves better,” Mark says, coming to stand next to Youngjae.
“She is a princess and she is to be treated like such!” Your boyfriend agreed. “Right babe?!”
“W-what?”
“Our daughter!” Youngjae practically slaps his face. “This is about her future, will you pay attention?”
“Yeah, Y/N,” Jinyoung scolds you, moving to stand with the boys. “This is important.”
“Will it be like this when we have kids?” Youngjae muses and that is enough to shut everyone up, eyes wide and mouths hanging open, pretty much like you are right now. “I mean, I don’t mind going to the PTA meetings, but I don’t think I can handle being the serious one in the family, love. Seriously, I’d be terrib–“
“Oh my god, don’t ruin this.”
Grabbing his face, you pull him down for a kiss, shutting him up with pure passion. You can hear the boys screaming and whistling in the back, but right now all you can think is about the fact that Youngjae has got you covered. For a long, long time you’ve known that he is it; there is no going up from Choi Youngjae– he is your happy ending. And you believe he just told you, you are his, too.
“When we have kids,” You tell him, a bit breathless. “We can worry about this; for now, we can both be overprotective parents and take Coco home. I think Dalkyum might be a bad influence on her.”
“What? Why?” Yugyeom whines, frowning.
“Because I haven’t seen any of them for about fifteen minutes and I’m starting to worry.”
That sets them all in panic. Jackson is the first one to run, screaming for the dogs, while the rest follow suit. You walk hand in hand with Youngjae, and he is not as worried as you thought he’d be– mainly because he knows Coco would never stray to far away from either of you– but also because he can see her next to some children a bit far ahead. None of you say a word, though, watching the guys running around each other, and you wonder when did a search party for your dog turned into a game of tag.
“What are you smiling about?” Youngjae asks, leaning down to pick Coco up. In turn, you pick up Dalkyum, afraid that he’d wonder again. 
“Just happy,” You kiss him on the cheek. “Happy you’re happy.”
“The whole family is here,” He laughs, and you smile; there is just something about Youngjae’s laughter that feels contagious. “What’s not to be happy about?”
“You’re right,” You hug Dalkyum closer, chuckling when Yugyeom calls you over. “They’re all here.”
—————————————
Am I the only one that thinks Youngjae is absolutely a chaotic good vibe?? He is so adorable, and his laugh is so contagious I could just burst every time I hear it 😚 What do you think of this one? Let me know! If you liked this story, please please please share, comment, like, or anything you feel comfortable doing ❤️ thank you for your endless support, lovelies💕
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agerestorybits · 4 years ago
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Fluff pile.
(Roman)
The pillow fort was made, the movies chosen. Popcorn popped. Apples sliced. Hot coco made.Smores baked. All that was left was for everyone to snuggle up and enjoy movie night.
Logan was the first down, wearing astronaut pj’s his paci on a star clip. “Cocoa?” He asked excitedly. Roman laughed and ruffled Logan’s hair. It was his night to babysit while all the others got to be little. He didn’t mind it at all. If anything it was one of his favorite moments to shine!
He pulled out all the stops, almost as if it was a friendly competition between all of them to see who could do the best job babysitting.
Roman handed Logan his mug, the one with simple math equations written on it like it was a chalkboard. “Tanks!” Roman smiled, Logan was in one of his younger head spaces.
“Where’s everyone else?” Roman asked.
“Soon.” Logan answered holding his mug carefully with both hands. Roman nodded.
“Do you need help to get settled into the fort?” Roman asked.
“I gots it!” Logan said, setting his mug down on the floor and collapsing into a bean bag before picking the mug back up.
Patton came down with Remus next. Patton in his cat onesie, Remus was wearing a zombie one. “Hi hi!” Patton waved. Remus copied him waving.
Remus going nonverbal when he was little. Roman waved back, He held out their mugs. Patton’s had ‘I like you a latte’ On it. Remus had eyes that were always looking at you.
“Hot chocolate!” Patton said happily. Remus smiled too. “Thanks!” Patton said as Remus just nodded.
“Enjoy!” Roman said eyes going to the stairs as Janus came down. He was wearing yellow and black ‘suit’ pajamas.
“Hot cocoa?” Roman asked. Janus smiled before looking at the snake mug. Roman noticed his hesitation. “Do you want it in a sippy cup?”
“Please?” Janus asked shily.
Roman waved his hand and a yellow sippy cup appeared. He poured the Hot chocolate in before closing it. He handed it over.
“Thank you.” Janus said quietly before going and taking his place in the corner away from everyone.
Patton and Remus sitting next to Logan. Roman smiled before doing a quick head count and coming up messing one.
He frowned and went hunting for Virgil.
“Stpid boton!” Virgil growled from his room. Roman knocked before sticking his head in.
“You don’t ok stormcloud?” Roman asked. He saw Virgil with his skeleton onesie misbuttoned as he tried to straighten it out.
“Help?” Virgil asked looking up at him.
Roman stepped in and quickly rebuttoned the onesies before just picking Virgil up. “Let’s ok watch a movie ok?”
“Mkay.” Virgil said hanging on to Roman as they went downstairs.
He got Virgil settled with his bat mug of hot cocoa before pulling out the snacks and turning on the movie, (Aristocats.) He settled down next to Janus in the corner. Janus curled up against him sideways, not afraid of spilling his drink. Roman hugged him with one arms as he’s eyes scanned over the others for any problems. Seeing none he turned back to the movie.
Perfect.
(Logan)
He took them all ‘camping’. (It was in the common rooms). He put glow in the dark stars on the ceiling and sleeping bags on the floor. There was a lantern on the floor that acted as the ‘campfire.’
Everyone was in their sleeping bags with their stuffed animals.
“Story?” Virgil asked from behind his paci. His arms are filled with a giant stuffed cat.
“I was planning on talking about some constellations.” Logan said.
“Oh.”
“What a con-steal-thing?” Patton asked.
“It’s a set of stars that makes a picture.”
“I like pictures!” Roman said.
“Can we just sleep?” Janus muttered. “I’m tired.” He rubbed his eyes.
Remus frowned at that. Patton looked at him. “Do you wanna hear about the Con-steal-thingies?”
“Constellations.” Logan corrected.
Remus nodded holding his plush squid to his chest. Half of his face hidden behind it.
Logan spend about an hour talking about them. The stars that made them up. (Whatever else you talk about constellations…..) Before he noticed that everyone had fallen asleep except Roman who was still wide awake listening. He was staring at Logan with awe.
“You’re so smart!” Logan paused before smiling.
“Thank you. Now I believe it’s time to sleep.” Logan said.
“Awww.” Roman groaned. Logan paused again.
“Do you want to see something?” Logan asked.
Roman nodded excitedly. Logan turned off the lantern. Roman looked up and saw the glow in the dark stars. He laid down staring at them. “Wow...You’re the best!”
“Sleep now.” Logan said, opening his own sleeping bag.
Roman nodded, still staring at the stars. He lifted his hands as if reaching for the stars. “I wish I was a star.”
“You already are.” Logan promised.
Roman giggled before yawning. He snuggled deeper into his sleeping bag and let his eyes drift closed.
(Patton)
The playground was made to be larger than a normal one so that when they played on it they felt smaller.
Patton watched from a bench as they all ran around playing. Remus (as always when he was little) stuck near Patton and was playing with toys around the bench.
Virgil was building a sand village with Logan in the sand box. Roman was pushing Janus on the swings.
They would play for another hour or so before Patton would call them over for lunch and a nap.
Remus tugged on Patton’s pant leg and handed him a barbie doll. He flapped his hands and pointed at the doll then to Patton.
“You want me to play too?”
Remus nodded and started bouncing. He flapped his hands again and grabbed another doll whose hair he was carefully brushing out.
Patton got down onto the ground with him and put a pair of shoes on the barbie before putting it in the dumptruck.
Remus frowned and shook his head. He dumped the barbie out and put a handful of grass in the truck.
Patton laughed. “Ok then. She doesn’t go there.”
Remus nodded and pointed at the grass and then at the truck. He pulled up more grass and put it in.
“Grass goes in there.” Patton clarified.
Remus shook his head.
“....trash?” Patton guessed. Remus smiled and he knew he got it right. He helped pull up some more grass till it was full.
Roman and Janus walked over, “Food?”
“Oh right!” Patton got up. Remus frowned. Patton ruffled his hair, “We can play again in a little bit kiddo.”
Remus huffed.
“Virgil! Logan! Lunch time!” Both of them ran over. Patton had packed sandwiches and juice boxes.
Everyone was quick to eat except Remus who kept playing.
“It’s time to eat now.”
Remus stared at him before. “N-n-no.” He forced out. Patton stared at him stunned. Remus never spoke in little space.
“What do you mean no?” Patton asked.
Remus pointed at the toys. “I know you want to keep playing but food is important too.”
“Pffft!”
“Remus.” Patton warned.
Remus started to tear up. Patton pulled him into his lap, “How about you eat while you play? Would that work?”
Remus nodded. He tried to put a handful of grass in his mouth. “NO! Nono! We’re eating sandwiches not grass!”
Remus sighed but accepted the sandwich.
Lunch was over quickly and there were a few yawning faces. “Time to go back.”
Remus crossed his arms and pouted as Patton picked up the toys. “Come on Remus.”
Remus turned his head away. Patton sighed and slowly started to walk away. Remus made a panicked noise and ran over, grabbing Patton’s hand. “You can keep playing back home...ok?”
Remus reluctantly nodded.
(remus)
Painting! What better activity was there for a bunch of littles? He thought. And the paint was edible...at least he ate it plenty of times with no problems.
Logan was busy carefully painting solid shapes. Virgil was painting colored cobwebs. Roman was making a castle with himself standing on the top of it. Patton was painting everyone. Janus was painting...himself.
Not on canvas. No he was covering himself in paint.
“We can play in the paint later.” Remus said.
“Bap!” Janus giggled as he slapped Remus in the face covering his face in blue paint. Remus licked some of it off.
“I’m supposed to tell you off for that. But it was funny so I won’t.” Remus said picking Janus up and carrying him into the kitchen to clean both of them up.
Janus giggled as he was cleaned up and ‘helped’ Remus get clean by hitting him in the face with the wet rag. “Thank you for helping little snake!”
“Welcom.” Janus said swinging his legs from where he sat on the counter.
“Help!” roman yelled. Remus picked up janus again and carried him back in. Roman had knocked over a paint jar all over his painting. He looked up at Remus panicked.
“Uh oh.” Patton said looking over. He patted Roman’s head trying to comfort him.
“Aww it’s ok. I can fix it!” Remus promised. He got a good look at what Roman had painted before he left and easily repainted it on a new canvas and replaced the ruined one. Roman inspected it closely before beaming.
“Thank you!”
“No problem.”
“Finisheded.” Logan said firmly. Remus looked at the carefully stacked shapes that filled the canvas perfectly.
“Good job!” Remus gave him a small hug.
“I wanna hug too!” Virgil said.
“Hey! Me too!” Patton said.
Remus grinned before grabbing both of them and pulling them close. He squished them together.
“Cuddle puddle!” Janus yelled jumping on them.
Remus laughed as Roman and Logan joined.
(janus)
It was easy, turn on the t.v pull out some toys and just sit back. Janus didn’t put much work into watching them. Even if Roman and Virgil competed for the ‘best’. He preferred to just have a relaxed non stressed time watching them.
Patton was showing Remus how to build a tower of blocks. Logan was reading a story book. Roman was watching sofia the first with Virgil.
All and all a very easy and relaxed afternoon.
Just the way he liked it. Logan crawled over with his book. “Ummm.”
“Do you want me to read to you?” Janus asked.
“It got big words.” Logan muttered embarrassed.
“Of course.” Janus had him sit down on the couch next to him. He put an arm around Logan and opened the book.
He didn’t notice Patton and Remus had come over to listen till Patton tugged on his pant leg. “Can we see the pictures too?”
He smiled, “Of course.” He tilted the book so they could see too.
It wasn’t long before Roman and Virgil wandered over as well.
He hadn’t planned on story time, but he had no problems with the change in schedule.
(Virgil)
You’d think that cooking would be what Patton would suggest for them. But no, Virgil set them all up decorating sugar cookies for halloween.
There were bats, pumpkins, and cats. All being colored in rainbow colors.
“It’s you!” Roman said holding up a bat cookie that was colored with purple.
“Thanks.” Virgil said taking the cookie.
Roman laughed, “I’mma make me next.”
“Oh?”
“Yeah. I’m red bat...to match you.” Roman said.
“We’re cats!” Patton said. Virgil turned to see Patton and Remus with frosting whiskers.
“OH! Na….yeah! You are! Good job!” He bit his lip trying not to laugh.
Janus drew an angry pumpkin and Logan made a happy pumpkin. “It’s important to have friends.” Logan informed him off hand.
“Yes. Very.” Virgil agreed.
“Patton! We suppose to eat the frosten on the cookies!” Roman said.
Patton was licking the frosting off his butter knife. “Mmm? BUt it’s GOOD!”
Virgil broke down laughing.
“V! It’s not funny! He’s not following the rules!” Roman said angry.
“Yeah!” Logan agreed looking up.
“He can...have some frosting.” Virgil said between laughs.
Janus took a bite out of his cookie. “It’s good!”
“See?” Patton said pointing.
Roman grumbled under his breath as he went back to coloring his red bat.
All in all a very successful cooking play date.
----
“So who won?” Roman asked.
Janus rolled his eyes, “Does it matter?”
“I think everyone won!” Patton said.
“I mean...the park was fun.” Virgil said.
“So was cooking.” Patton said.
“The camping thing was fun.” Roman admitted.
“I enjoyed painting.” Janus said quietly.
“Movie night was great!” Remus said.
“I enjoyed reading with Janus.” Logan said.
“Oh yeah! That was great!” Remus agreed.
“It was nice.” Virgil admitted.
“So Janus won?”
Janus looked up, “What?”
“Good job.” Roman said. “I’ll get you next round.”
“This isn’t...oh forget it.” Janus rolled his eyes, secretly very pleased with being voted the best.
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cecilsstorycorner · 4 years ago
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Writerblr Indroduction - Actual Writer Version
Hallo! I’ve actually been on here for a couple weeks now, but never did an actual introduction of myself. Because I’m terrified of acknowledgement of the self beyond my work? Probably.
I’m Cecil, I make nonsense, and I’m here to make terrible puns and worse metaphors.
(I like and send asks from my main @dontdropthejam !)
Fun Facts (aka basic info):
they/them, gender is No
living in bc but very visably a german/english pale ass little shit whos still bitter they werent raised bilingual and with more traditions than just nikolaus and mahlzeit
ace as all hell, probably on the aro spectrum somewhere, still attempts to write romance subplots
i have two cats and that is VERY important information because my life revolves around them
their names are coco and pepita and they cause problems on purpose
My go to writing nonsense (aka the stuff I keep coming back to in every wip ever):
folklore babyyy! every single thing i write has SOMETHING folklore related/inspired, no matter the genre. mostly scottish, germanic, russian, and scandinavian as that’s what i had the most access to learning as a kiddo and find most personally interesting in the kind of stuff that shows up, but i dip into others sometimes!
love me some exploration of trauma. every single character of mine needs therapy and they are unaware they are mine
there are now multiple instances of tall nervous lad + short fighty lesbian duos across my stories so thats fun
apparently half my stories count as ‘urban fantasy’ but that just makes me think of uncomfortably hot werewolves, so a better description is ‘real world but with GHOSTS and CELTIC FOLKLORE and GAYS’. sometimes modern but i have a soft spot for the 1760’s ish uk for some reason
horror! but horror that will make you cry. my goal is to be the queer folklory mike flanagan
speaking of that, im the most character focused you can be. im the kind of person who cant watch most movies as they focus way too much on premise not character. unfortunately that means i can have trouble coming up with plots that work but ill get there
fav themes include: motherhood, grief, family, friendship, guilt, trauma, healing from said trauma
fav tropes and trope adjacent things: found family (duh), spooky towns with a Secret, magic but gone wrong, old journals, creeping horror
i dont stick to prose because im extra and pretentious. storytelling mediums i have attempted so far (with varying levels of success ) include: literal physical journal (every time ive used this its been for horror, no surprise there), webcomic/graphic novel, audio drama, item box ala mysterious package company, and yes, good old fashioned prose books
Current wips:
The Book of Broken Strings (main focus atm)
The Embassy of Peculiar Chronology
The Collectors
Current favourite wips/writers I’m following:
@teriwrites Beneath Alder Creek. Has that folklore fae element I love so much, as well as characters I would die for
@chayscribbles Andromeda Rogue. This cast owns my whole heart and Chay has done the impossible of making me genuinely invested in a scifi story which hasn’t happened since my middle school doctor who days so that’s a VERY good sign of how Top Quality this wip is
@ashen-crest’s The Stray Spirit. The whole concept of the story is just so fun and once again, the characters holy shit. Plus there’s LOTS of writing and art out for it so it’s super easy to get a handle on after a bit of blog lurking!
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lovelivingmydreams · 5 years ago
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Wrong door
I watched the latest Sanders Sides video and I have feelings that I need to write about. So here a little one shot.
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OBVIOUSLY SPOILER WARNING FOR SANDERS SIDES
Summary: When Roman leaves he doesn’t go to his room straight away. Maybe his turbulent mind sought this place out to fit his mood. Maybe deep down he knew that there was only one person who could help him understand what he did wrong.
The conversation leads to discussions and remenicing of their past, why the King ever split, why Virgil left to the ‘dark side’ to begin with and the reason Virgil doesn’t trust Deciet despite living with him and the others for years.
After Roman sunk out he appeared in a much darker environment than he expected. His room was always bright and colorful, packed with Disney memorabilia, red drapes and stage lighting. The gloomy atmosphere he was faced with now made his already fragile self-esteem crumble even more. Was this because deceit... Janice, was right about him? Was he really not the hero? But Paton always said... ‘The brave, handsome, unbeatable Roman,’ But then again... ‘I don’t always know the answer,’ He felt his chest tighten. It was harder to breathe. No. He... He isn’t bad. He only ever wanted to help Thomas. He was trying to do the right thing... But so was Patton. And De... Janice, of all people had been protecting Thomas from him when he lost it... “Ro? What happened?” Roman’s head snapped up. Virgil what... Then he realized where he was. The Tim Burton poster behind him, he cobwebs the dark atmosphere. This was Virgil’s room... He came here instead of his own... Why? “Is Thomas mad at me?” the younger side asked nervously. “I could tell he felt really stressed just now, I tried to leave him be after the whole wedding... I’m sorry, I know I panicked when Mary Lee and Lee came over, but...” Roman raised his hands to calm Virgil down. Today had been terrible for everyone. But their purple patched cautious guardian was probably the only one who would’ve had an equally horrible time no matter what they had done today. The callback would’ve been hell because so much was riding on it. The wedding was horrible because, well… mandatory social interaction, and Virgil had been particularly terrified of saying the wrong thing to their friends. What if they realize we aren’t having a good time? What if they think we look dumb in this suit? What if they realize it’s a rental and think we don’t care? Virgil took a few deep breaths and nodded. “I’m really sorry. I know how important today was to you, and I made us blow it,” he sighed. Roman shook his head. “No one is mad at you Virgil. That’s not what Patton and I were talking about... I wish you’d joined though,” he sighed, raking his hand through his hair. His nervous energy intensifying with every minute. But was that because of the room or because of his own thoughts? Probably both. “...Ro. Maybe we should head to your room instead?” Virgil offered gently. It wasn’t quite like him to sound so sincerely worried. They usually communicated their affection to one another through sarcasm and mild jabs. But ever since Remus made an appearance Virgil hadn’t been his usual self in general. He’d been more withdrawn, more careful with what he said. Not less active in his contributions, but Roman had seen his angsty friend less around the mindscape almost like when he wasn’t part of the group. As their friendship grew, they’d taken to having Disney nights in his room where they’d discuss the movies and Virgil even tolerated Roman singing along to the songs at full volume. But recently... He probably should have popped in here before now instead of ‘giving him space’. Was that even really what he’d been doing? Or was he just too much of a coward to face him and possibly have to own up for his past mistakes? He really was a  terrible friend. So egotistical. Why couldn’t he ever consider other’s feelings? He’d tried today, really had tried not to hurt Patton’s feelings while discussing doing the right thing. Tried not to push. Tried to really listen to what he had to say so he wouldn’t make any more mistakes. He’d been ready to swallow his pride and take a step back when it seemed like Patton was too busy with not hurting his ego to really do his job . And it was still not enough The aching in his chest intensified. Right, not the place for these thoughts. Roman looked at Virgil gratefully and nodded. He could use some time with his newest friend. Virgil was good. Helpful. A team player from the start He’d never pretended to be his friend when he was not. And even when they hated each other -though hate was a strong word for the aversion he used to have for the embodiment of anxiety- Virgil had made performances better, more exciting,  even inspired him to create. How things had changed since the fanders first met him. “Alright, breathe with me, and let’s go,” he instructed. Roman focused on the other side’s breathing and before he knew it they were in his room. With the familiar lavish decor, the countless posters and trinkets... But it all looked a little... off. It was not ready for a guest, and he was always ready for guests. There were decorative couch cushions on the floor, some of the red velvet drapes were askew and the whole room felt just a little wrong to him. Imagine coming home and someone had entered and pushed nearly everything a touch to the left. Nearly imperceptible, but enough for you to know something is wrong. Great even his own room couldn’t give him comfort now. He let out a sigh, not his usual dramatic sigh, just a plain old tired sigh, and sat down on the couch with his head in his hands. “Ro? What happened?” Virgil asked confused. “I know something really got everyone upset. Even pops felt... Unusually distraught. I stayed in my room to not make it worse. But Thomas seems okay now. So why aren’t you... You know? Tatata,” Virgil finished with a week imitation of triumphant trumpets and Roman’s usual introduction pose. It made the embodiment of creativity smirk despite himself and then he sighed again. “Janice happened,” he muttered defeated, feeling completely spent. “Janice... You mean Janus? Deceit? He... He told you?” Virgil muttered confused. “Janus?” Roman mused. “That makes slightly more sense,” he allowed before leaning back and letting his head rest against the wall. Whatever, he still thought it was a weird name. Janus... He’s never going to get used to that. Maybe he should stop reading fan speculations on them though. Perhaps if he hadn’t been thinking of Deceit as Damien this whole time he wouldn’t have had such a strong reaction to Janus. Not that he wouldn’t have teased him. He absolutely would. He’d been upset at the serpentine side as it was. He’d been about ready to snap the whole time and the frog thing happened and D, Janus showed up and he didn’t know how to feel or what to think. So, yes he lashed out. He tried to get a little control over the situation because he couldn’t deal with one more thing tilting his worldview. And then... He felt the couch shift under an added weight. Right, Virgil is here with him. He glanced aside. Virgil was sitting on the armrest, looking at him expectantly. He normally would protest against Virgil putting his shoes on the couch, but right now he couldn’t care less. His friend needed a summary. “He... replaced Logan again and pushed Patton into being a frog monster. Accused Patton of deceiving Thomas, on accident, but still, and then he... Convinced Patton and Thomas to like him.” he summarized. Creating a monster to fight so he could be the hero. How absolutely despicable. “... Wait back up... Logan, is Logan alright?” “Physically or emotionally?” Roman asked dryly. Because apparently Thomas and Patton forgot that Janus hurt others. Hurt Thomas, hurt Patton, Virgil and Logan. And yes, Roman too felt hurt by the snake. Remus might be the only side not hurt by him and that was because Remus lacked the attention span to be upset at anything. He envied that sometimes. The ability to not care at all. Suddenly there was knocking on Roman’s door. “Roman? You in there sport? I brought hot coco?” It was Patton. Roman grabbed one of the fallen cushions, put it between his stomach and his legs, which he pulled towards his chest and curled up in a ball. He didn’t want to talk to him right now. After a moment of silence he heard Virgil get up, walk away and then he heard the door open. “He’s taking a nap. Seems really out for the count. I was going to check up on Logan next, but could you do that? You know how emotional roller coasters like today take it out of me. Besides, I think Lo would much rather hear from you anyway. I’m going to nap in here. My room is a bit too much for me right now you know?” “Oh, of course Kiddo! You take it easy. I’m going to need to talk to you about something though...” “How you’ve left Janus of all people in charge of Thomas’s post learning moment aftercare? Yeah, Roman gave me the headlines. I trust your judgment Patton. But I don’t trust Jan. Not for a second. He’d never hurt Thomas on purpose, i know that, none of us would. Thomas isn’t self-destructive by nature. The problem is, I’m not sure if he’s ready to see that he can hurt him on accident.” It was quiet for a minute. “I think I know what that’s like... I’m really sorry kiddo. I know that I’ve been the cause of a lot of your pain too,” their paternal side offered softly. Silence. Roman imagined that Virgil was speechless by that declaration. That was Janus’s great power. He’d gotten Patton to think that he was the bad guy. Patton! “I remember when Thomas was still young and you just started to really manifest. Before... Before we pushed you away as a bad thing. You’d hang onto me and panic whenever I got nervous about Thomas doing a wrong thing, thinking a bad thought... I did that to you. Because I was too strict and I was teaching you to think in black and white too. And when we pushed you away... Of course you thought you had to be the bad guy to do your job. I taught you that. And I hate it. I wish I could go back. Go back and hug little you and me and say that it’s okay. But I can’t. I just hope that you’ll believe me when I say... I’m really sorry and I’ll try to be better.” A few more moments of silence. “Pops... you aren’t entirely to blame for me believing I was bad. Janus, has just as much to do with that, if not more.” Roman forced himself to stay where he was. He knew it! He knew there was a reason Virgil reacted to the others like that. He should’ve listened to him. Asked about his history before. The whole callback situation wouldn’t have been such a stressful episode if he had just heard Virgil out. “What do you mean kiddo?” “The thing about him is, he deals in extremes. Today you might have seen him in a sincere and nurturing mood, but we have all seen how deceitful and destructive and manipulative he can be,” Virgil explained gently. Mindful of a sleeping friend who wasn’t really asleep.  “You saw what that behavior did to Roman, even if he didn’t mean to hurt him.” Roman felt a jolt of warmth at the protective edge that coated Virgil’s voice at that statement. Oh, how had he been so wrong about him? All this time he could’ve had a valiant knight at his side. “One moment he looks at you and sees a friend a brother... A son.” That nearly made Roman jump up again. Janus had hurt Virgil, that was the only explanation for the way his voice softened at that last title. He’d slay the demon. They’d already established that nothing they did could do physical damage to the others as long as they didn’t let it have power over them. Janus, who’d been wrangling Remus for years, would surely not blink an eye at being run through, or beheaded. So it wouldn’t be that bad if he and Virgil got a few therapeutic stabs in for their benefit... but for now he forced himself to remain silent. He’d talk to Virgil about the best way to avenge him later. After Patton left them alone. “The next, you are a pawn to be manipulated in any way that suits what he thinks to be the greater good in that moment. And when he speaks you never know for certain if it’s a painful truth you need to hear to become better, stronger, or a hurtful lie to make you suit his needs.” ‘I don’t need to flatter you’... ‘Who is the evil twin’ Virgil took in a long breath and let it out with a sigh. “It’s a long story, and you should really go get Logan hot coco just the way he likes it. He deserves some patented Patton love as well.” “Alright kiddo. Thanks for being honest with me. I hope you’ll tell us all the story later so we can understand. But take your time. And thank you for trying to spare my feelings by not telling me that Roman isn’t ready for a talk yet.” Well, there went that illusion. “You two rest up. Take care of him for me, and tell him... Tell him I’m sorry I let him down.” Again Roman nearly went for the door. But he wasn’t ready. With the way he was feeling now, he’d lash out again and he didn’t know for sure who would have to face the brunt of his emotional outbursts. “I’m sure he’d say that you did nothing of the sort. Don’t let Janus get into your head too much. Ugly truths and painful lies Patton. Don’t fall for the latter just because he gave you a little of the former,” Virgil warned. “I’ll keep that in mind. Good night then. Thomas should be taking a day or two to relax and take care of himself so you should get plenty of time to recover,” Patton assured Virgil. “Night, see you in a minute when something goes wrong anyway.” Roman could hear Patton chuckle before the door closed. He expected Virgil to come back to sit where he sat before right away, but he heard him moving around the room and then the kitchen... What was going on? Suddenly he felt a blanket being draped over him, pillows being put all around and Virgil’s warm body joining his under the blanket. “You tell anyone about this, I’ll deny it until the end times. But pillows and blankets help me feel safer sometimes. And you know, Logan told me once that physical contact with a friend can be calming or whatever I didn’t really listen to the whole thing, you know how he kind of goes on. But I wrote down the gist of his tips. And then there is the always reliable, comfort food,” he announced as he gave Roman a fresh cup of hot coco with little marshmallows and rainbow sprinkles and whipped cream. What had Roman nearly tear up was that it was in his mug. One with a little Stitch figure that said “Ohana Means Family”. Not one of Patton’s pet themed mugs. His own. Virgil had made him this from scratch. Exactly the way he’d like it when he’s feeling down. He heard a clank and saw that Virgil had also put down a can of rainbow mini muffins. He kept those around to have as a treat on good and bad days. They had a delicious molten chocolate filling. When had Virgil even see him take one? It didn’t matter. This was everything he needed to get through the story he would have to tell, and the one he had to hear. “So, spill,” Virgil instructed as he laid a hand on his back in support. With a deep breath Roman told him everything as he’d experienced it from the moment he’d gotten home until the moment he’d popped up in Virgil’s room. By the end he was sobbing. The mug of hot coco was halfway, but stood on the coffee table as he was busy ruining Virgil’s hoodie with his tears. Damn all of this. He was too tired to hang on to his pride. Virgil didn’t make fun of him though he let him cry and listened to his exclamations of: “I just don’t understand what I did wrong? Why... Why am I the bad guy in this? Didn’t I do the right thing? Going to the wedding? I just... I just wanted to do the right thing. Thomas counted on me to give him hope. To rise above the challenge and defy that serpent’s scheme despite the odds. But other than a brief feeling of victory... I’ve never felt worse. I mean, Remus got the better of me for the first time in ages. It’s not right! Why do I feel like I’m being punished for doing what we knew was right, while Janus is being celebrated? Janus was wrong... Wasn’t he?” He’s glad Virgil is the only witness to this breakdown. If Patton saw this, he would blame himself. And Logan might try to help but have not much helpful to offer, other than an objective analysis or an experiment that might nudge Roman in the right direction, but he was in no mood to dissect any complicated explanations. Remus would make him feel worse, same goes for Janus, even if he were to try and be helpful it would only confuse Roman even more. And then there was... Well, he never was much help when it comes to solving problems. There was a reason why he hadn’t joined them in the physical world for any of their discussions. And Thomas... God he’d never regain Thomas’s respect if he’d see him like this. “You did good Ro. But we all knew that we felt conflicted about it when we left the door. We’re all on edge and from the sound of it, you weren’t at fault in the escalation of the conflict. Patton is the one who wasn’t honest with himself out of fear to disappoint Thomas. And Janus was the one to push him to the edge. And it was Janus who’d hurt you in the past and didn’t bother to apologize or acknowledge it had even happened. Of course you were on edge around him. But that’s just how he is,” Vigil sighed as he rubbed Roman’s back soothingly. That reminded Roman... He sat up and wiped his eyes. “What happened? You said that Janus was a big part of the reason you thought you were bad or something?” Roman asked picking up his mug to give himself something to focus on other than the soul bearing moment they’d shared. Virgil sighed and looked up to the swirling lines that decorated his ceiling. “Right. Remember the last time I had one of my fits before I started hanging with the others?” Roman nodded. He didn’t like thinking back to that time. He and Remus hadn’t been separated for that long yet and there were times when he still felt wrong without him. And in those moments he blamed Virgil, then still just fear. He remembered little of being ‘The King’, didn’t even really recall their old name, but one of the things he did remember was the split. He was thinking of something he thought was funny, something with a word mom would scold them for, but that made it even funnier. Patton had scolded him and something about the reprimand had triggered Fear. Ironically, seeing Fear in distress like that had triggered a protective instinct in the king and he’d been so eager to comfort the boy. He’d been torn. Part of him wanted to defy Patton and tell Fear that Thomas wouldn’t get in trouble for a small thing like that. The other wanted to promise to never think of anything upsetting ever again so the little timid boy could relax a little and play with them. Next thing he knew one part was promising these things while hugging Virgil and another was giggling and running around shouting all kinds of strange and bad things and letting his train of thought jump from one topic to another as random things kept catching his attention. Virgil had always been the inspiration for the noble prince. For his first act had been to protect the confused boy from the source of his troubles. He’d called for his princely attire to resemble the prince in Cinderella and swung his sword, then still a harmless toy sword, and Remus had actually enjoyed playing a ferocious dragon. And Virgil had laughed at their game and relaxed. Roman and Remus never questioned their existence... But Patton and Logan had been surprised and Patton had soon come to understand that all the things he would scold the king for were stuck in the green twin, while all the nice thoughts were with the red one, who introduced himself as Roman to them. Roman received praise and watched his brother get scolded and eventually ‘the snake man’ had come to pick is brother up from their room. Roman had pleaded not to of course, as any decent brother would. But then the snake man said something that terrified him. Thomas didn’t want his brother’s thoughts in his head. So the snake man took his brother somewhere where Thomas could pretend he didn’t exist. And he’d forced Roman to stand still and let Thomas forget about the other creativity. He couldn’t even mention him again. Not when Thomas might hear at least. That had scared Roman. When he told Patton about where his brother was taken he’d been assured that something like that would never happen to him. Thomas loved being creative. Roman was the hero. He got to be at the wheel almost all the time. He was the Prince after all... It had been comforting and terrifying at the same time. What if he messed up? Would Thomas stop loving him? It was then that the feeling of wrongness started showing up. And that scared him even more. He couldn’t miss being with Remus. Remus was bad, Roman was good. And good people didn’t want to be around bad people. Bad people were put away and forgotten about. It was while he was in one of these moments of self-doubt that Fear panicked at something he considered irrelevant. It had gotten to Roman and he’d blown up at Fear for freaking out over a stupid stain. This had triggered Virgil even more and Thomas had jumped back and knocked over one of the nice glasses from the counter somehow. His mother had been angry, but in that worried way only parents can really pull off. This however had gotten Patton and Logan’s attention. Logan had scolded Fear because his disproportionate reaction to a small problem created a bigger one. Patton had scolded him because Thomas was in trouble now and it was their task to keep him out of trouble. Roman had wanted to tell the others that Fear had reacted to him shouting, not the stain, but the others were already telling Fear that if he didn’t watch out, he would be pushed away and then what would happen to Thomas? This had caused Fear to run away and next time Roman saw him, he was ‘a bad guy’. “I never really said i was sorry. I swear I wanted to explain to the others why you freaked, I did, but next time we saw you...” He didn’t know where to look. He felt so ashamed of his actions. Virgil patted his back. “It’s alright Sir Singalot,” he grinned, using the nickname that Roman had approved off as a sign of peace. “You guys didn’t push me away. That’s just how you see it now through a veil of guilt. I never intended to leave. I needed to get away for a minute,” Virgil explained casually, but then his voice grew tense as his eyes darkened at the memory.
“And he was right there,” he whispered and Roman could imagine the figure swooping in. Offering an insecure and neglected side a comforting embrace. “He was telling me both the things I feared to be true and things I wanted to hear someone say.”
He could imagine that too. The smooth voice spinning truths and lies in a delicate trap to lure young Fear to his side of the consciousness.
“He told me that you guys would never really want me around. But he also said that that was stupid of you because I keep Thomas safe. That you needed me more than you realize. And if you weren’t going to listen to simple reason, then I’d have to be loud so I couldn’t be ignored.” Virgil looked back towards Roman for with a sad, understanding smile.
“He might have believed he was helping me. That he was saving me many more of these arguments. He’ll probably swear up and down that he was looking out for me and Thomas and even all of you.” Roman got the idea that Virgil was trying to say something about Janus’ intentions towards him as well. But he couldn’t find the will to believe that the man hadn’t been malicious towards him or even any of the others when he did the things he did. Good intentions or not –like with the cake the end result was still the same. Virgil seemed to agree, because his face darkened again as he continued his story. 
“But when he found me after you guys accepted me, he started saying those things again and I said he was wrong and that we’d all been going about it the wrong way. I wanted us all to step into the sun...”
“Dear Evan Hansen,”  Roman grinned teasingly to lighten the mood. He got a playful shove and a smirk. He’d take the victory. It kind of made him feel better. To know that he could still be a good friend despite the disaster of today.
“He slipped,” Virgil continued. “Or maybe he thought I’d feel bad for him and stay... I don’t know. He broke my trust and I’ll never be able to be sure if he’s truthful with me... But that day, he said he wouldn’t let you guys take me away from him.” Roman’s eyes widened as the implications of that sunk in. He wasn’t sure if he felt sorry for the man or wanted to punch him even more.
“I realized in that moment that he had manipulated the truth to ensure that I wouldn’t get along with you guys. He was lonely and he didn’t want to share. So he took of the blindfold and broke the piñata open to get the friend he wanted. And for years, that worked. But then, because Thomas accepted that he has anxiety, I got a real seat at the table, even if no one liked me being there. And then we worked together in the open more often and well... You know what happened. He hated that I spent time with you guys. He hated that I had nice things to say about Patton, that I kind of appreciated the debate with Logan... That I admired your... drive.”
“Wait what?” Roman shot up in surprise, nearly losing the cover of the blanket in the process. He hadn’t expected a sincere complement. He’d been ready for a little jab like ‘tolerated your presence’ or something. Not admiration...
“Don’t make me regret this... I always kind of looked up to you. Because you were never afraid to go for what you want. I don’t envy that ability. But I think it’s cool that you can.”
Roman was speechless. It succeeded in making him feel a bit better, but it also left him in awe of his friend. This is why he appreciated Virgil so much. He was sincere. Always. He didn’t sugarcoat anything he said what he thought the way he thought it. He might have learned to voice his concerns more clearly and less like death threats, but he still said what was on his mind. So a complement like this form him? Well, that was the highest praise he could imagine.
“Anyway...” Virgil continued with a blush, avoiding Roman’s gaze. “Feeding your ego aside.” He took a deep breath which brought Roman back to the here and now. Right serious talk time.
“The fight got ugly. I accused him of lying to me all this time for selfish reasons. He denied the reasons I gave, but not the fact that he lied. I got so mad. I told him to stay away from us. That I never wanted to see his face again. And I’ve been pissed ever since. I didn’t want you guys anywhere near him, because I can’t be sure that he won’t hurt you the way he hurt me, whether he wants to or not. And I was right. He hurt you, he hurt Patton and Logan and even Thomas. It all led to a big lesson about self-care and everything. But I agree, we can’t let our guard down around him. Ever.”
Roman hugs Virgil close. “Want me to stab him for you? Because I would totally stab him for you,” he promises.
Virgil allows a small chuckle and returns the hug. “I’ll think about it.”
Just then their surroundings changed and they were sitting on the bed in the bedroom. “Thomas must be getting ready for the night,” Roman observed, some rest would be great. Dreams took care of themselves. He could chose to influence them but tonight he couldn’t be bothered. Remus might give them some weird twists but who cared? At this rate, they’d also let him have a seat at the table one of these days so he might as well start getting used to having him around again. But if Remus was accepted back, would that make them be ‘the king’ again? No. Not thinking about that tonight.
He felt Virgil get up next to him. “I’ll get going then...”
“No,” Roman hurried as he pulled Virgil back into his side. This got him a surprised look, but he didn’t care. “Neither of us should really be alone right now don’t you think? And I don’t think you were exactly lying when you said your room was too intense for you right now,”
Virgil shrugged. “No... But...”
Just then they both manifested their sleepwear. A comfy shirt and sweats in their respective colors.
“Thomas is going to sleep. We should too... And I really don’t want to be alone with my thoughts right now,” he confessed. This seemed to convince Virgil. It wasn’t like it would be the first time. Well it was the first time they’d both sleep in his bed and in their pj’s. But it had happened that one of them dozed off on the other ones shoulder during a movie a few times. No big deal.
So along with Thomas they settled in for the night.
Virgil felt that Roman was still tense and it was affecting Thomas’s ability to fall asleep. At least, Virgil told himself that this was the reason why he turned towards him wrapped his arms around his fellow side and started singing, his voice drifting through the dark room. “There are shouters and murmurers, loan sharks and burglars...” by the end of the song both had relaxed and drifted off to sleep.
There it’s not perfect, i started writing at nine in the evening and it’s now almost two. So my brain is fried. Might write a follow up shorter bit about the inside out perspective on the last scene with Lee and Mary Lee when I’m actually awake. Edit: Fixed the spelling a bit
With love lovelivingmydreams
Next part this is going to be longer than I planned
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allisonxmoynihan · 4 years ago
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always be my baby ~ p. moynihan
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Request: could you write something with any of the boys moynihan where you see him after a really bad break up and memories come flooding back in and you end up talking and he says if he could go back and do it all over again with you he would
Word Count: 7391
Note: This was previously posted on my old account but with a different title. After posting I thought this title was better suited. But I wanted to repost this because I got a lot of requests for a part two, so that will be in the works soon!
You were sitting on your bed with your dad’s gift sprawled out in front of you: a picture collage of you and him throughout your 18 years of life, your baby photo smack dab in the middle; the picture frame was decorated in vintage buttons, something you knew your dad would appreciate. You were trying to figure out how to wrap it as you were on a facetime call with your best friends Kelsie and Olivia.
“Yeah, I don’t know Kels, it’s really weird that he asked for your opinion on what to wear if he was only going to ask Jenna out like three hours later,” you say finally selecting on the wrapping paper that says ‘super dad’ and ‘my number one hero’ all over it. 
“That’s what I’m saying, girl we’re gonna find you someone though because no one is gonna treat one of my girls like that,” Olivia sasses.
“Thanks girls. Hey, y/n what time is the barbeque? Your mom just said to come today, but like when? Because I don’t wanna be late, but I gotta get ready so I look good. Oh! Lemme show you the dress I’m gonna wear!” Kelsie exclaims, running over to her closet.
You laugh, “you can come whenever, I’m going down to help my mom cook in a little bit anyway. My dad’s fishing with the little troublemakers right now, so it’s going to be a surprise.”
You pick out a blue and green braided ribbon to compliment the wrapping paper as the girls explain that they’re going to get ready and head over right away to help you and your mom. Grabbing your dad’s gift, you walk downstairs to the kitchen where your mom stands fumbling over a recipe book.
“I don’t know why they make the print so small when older people are the ones that cook!” she exclaims, “y/n, get over here. Can you read this for me? Does it say ¾ tbs.?”
You crinkle up your face, “mom, what the heck, it says ½ a teaspoon.”
“You know, one day you’re going to be just like me needing your kids to read recipes to you.” She pauses when she looks up, her face softening when she sees you in your white floral dress with your hair curled and held back in a half up half down style. A wide smile blossoms on her face, “oh, sweetie, you’re so beautiful,”
Your face grows red in embarrassment at your mom’s compliment, “mooommm,” you whine causing her to smile back at you.
“Come on, are you helping or what? We have almost fifty people coming in two hours, and where are Liv and Kels?”
As if on cue Olivia and Kelsie come in through the front door and into the kitchen, gift bags in hand.
“Hello!” They sing together.
You smile at your best friends as your mom directs them on how to help prepare various dishes for the party. 
By the time the food tables are neatly organized by appetizers, main dishes, and desserts, guests come flooding into your backyard and find themselves preoccupied with cornhole, chit chatting, or gossiping about the neighborhood kids.
Your little brothers Luke and Nate come running into the backyard, “He’s coming!” they squeal, hiding behind the slide so that they can scare your dad.
When your dad rounds the corner and sees everyone he starts laughing as everyone yells a big, “surprise!” 
Your brothers come up to you and your friends asking if you guys can go to the front yard to play basketball, and you happily oblige to their request. The three of you let the six year old boys outrun you and score over and over again as they giggle and boast about how great they are. The moment is cut short when you look up to see the Moynihan clan approaching your driveway. You feel your throat begin to tighten as you turn around and run inside to the bathroom. 
Your family and the Moynihans were close, so you knew it was inevitable that you would eventually see him again. You’ve been dreaming up the different ways this exact moment would happen, but nothing could prepare you for this. You cuss at yourself for thinking you were actually over the only boy you had ever really loved. It’s easy to think you’re over someone when you don’t have to see them every day, but seeing Patrick getting out of the backseat of his mom’s car had everything come flooding back in. And that’s when it finally hit you: you were still madly in love with him.
~*~
It was the first weekend of December, a light snowfall dusting the grounds of Millis that you and Patty found yourselves downtown Boston for the annual tree lighting ceremony. The cold winter breeze caused your body to go numb, but you were thankful for the hot coco patrick had bought that was keeping you warm. 
You were standing in front of him with your back pressed against his torso towards the front of the crowd, his hands wrapped loosely around your waist, his chin resting on your shoulder. He was gently swaying you back and forth as dusk was fast approaching.
“Do you wanna come over and help decorate sugar cookies after the ceremony?” patty asks, pressing a gentle kiss to your cheek. 
You feel a blush creep onto your cheeks. Knowing you didn’t want this night to end you accepted his offer. Baking with patrick was something you always wanted to do but never really had the guts to ask to do. It’s not that you thought he wouldn’t do it with you, because you had him wrapped so tightly around your finger, the boy would do absolutely anything for you if you asked. 
“Awesome,” he grins, “we just have to stop at the grocery store on our way home then. Mom said we need frosting and food coloring.” you nod, a shiver coming over you. “You cold?” he asks, and without waiting for an answer he takes off his scarf and wraps it around your neck smiling at you, “looks way better on you,”
You roll your eyes playfully at him, “you’re such a loser, you know that right?”
He chuckles, “oh yeah? A loser that you love”
The two of you stand in silence as the stars become visible and the skyline becomes illuminated in the shadows of the night. You and patty stare up at the enormous tree in the middle of Boston Common, the mayor starting a countdown and everyone eagerly joining in. And before you know it the tree is sparkling and the ornaments radiate and reflect the light. An older couple offers to take your photo with Patrick in front of the lit tree, and you couldn’t be any happier than right here in this moment with your boyfriend.
On the car ride to Shaw’s you and Patty are blasting Luke Combs and singing along. Patrick turns up the volume when Beautiful Crazy comes on, “Alright ladies and gents, this song is dedicated to the one and only love of my life,  y/n y/l/n, my beautiful girlfriend that I love more than anything in this world.” You laugh at his pretending of giving a concert as he starts to belt out the lyrics, “She's unpredictable, unforgettable, It's unusual, unbelievable, How I'm such a fool, yeah, I'm such a fool for her…” Pat scream sings, closing his eyes and tilting his head back on the headrest. 
You giggle at the sight, taking over the next line, “The way that she dances, ain't afraid to take chances”
“And wears her heart on her sleeve”
“Yeah, she's crazy, she's crazy, she's crazy”
The two of you look each other in the eyes, smiling widely as Patrick finishes off the song, “But her crazy's beautiful to me”
Back at the Moynihan household Mrs. Moynihan takes out a container of six cookies for you two to decorate, “you’re lucky the girls saved some for you two,” she smiles, starting to mix different food colorings into separate bowls of frosting. “Let me know when you kiddos are done and I’ll clean up while you take y/n home, okay?” Mrs. Moynihan says as she pats Patrick on the back before walking into the family room to join her husband. 
“Thanks mama,” Patty calls out after her.
You grab a cookie and some light blue frosting, getting ready to make a snowflake and accent it with the white pearl sprinkles Mrs. Moynihan took down for you. Patty starts singing holiday tunes as he’s bopping his head up and down to the beat of the songs, “y/n don’t be a grinch! Join in!” he laughs, throwing a handful of sprinkles at you.
“Patrick!” you hiss, as he starts singing Jingle Bells.
“Come on y/n, I know you know this one!” you shake your head but join in anyway.
You finish your snowflake cookie, glad that it actually turned out and wasn’t ugly. You go to show Patrick, but in the process you see his creation. “Uhh, what is that?”
He looks up at you confused, “A hockey stick, what else does it look like?” he scoffs.
You raise your eyebrows looking at the crooked black lines that are scribbled on his cookie as he works on filling it in, his tongue hanging out the side of his mouth, clearly in deep concentration. 
“I don’t know, it kind of looks like a mangled spider leg.”
He looks at you with a hurt expression on his face, “I can’t believe you just said that to me.”
You smile, “Yeah, well at least you’re good at something, Patty… but it’s definitely not this.”
~*~
You walk out to your backyard to see your mom waving you over to her and some of the book club moms.
“y/n why don’t you tell everyone about your plan to go to New York,” she smiles encouragingly.
You hate the attention your mom brings to your project all the time, but you’re also thankful that she’s supportive and proud of your hard work and dedication.
“Oh, it’s nothing really. I’m in a film class at school so I’m going to New York in a couple of weeks with Kelsie and Olivia to make a short film to bring attention to the homeless and ways we can fight it together.”
The moms look at you all impressed, “Oh wow, that’s very nice. And where do you go to school again honey?” one of the moms asks you.
“Tufts,”
“Oh, how impressive,” the moms turn back to your own mom and begin gossiping about the next thing that comes across their mind. 
You turn on your heel to go look for Liv and Kels to save you from all the parents boasting about their kids’ accomplishments and gossiping about the rebellious neighborhood kids. And that’s when you see it, and your heart sinks all over again. At the table you see Patrick and your dad talking. Patty says something that must have made your dad laugh because your dad throws his head back, slapping his knee, as Patrick chuckles softly to himself. You feel hot tears sting your eyes and threaten to spill as you try and fight them back.
You try to ignore the memories of the weekly disney marathons at your house that Patrick would come to, but to no avail the memories come flooding in all over again. The two of you snuggled up on the couch, him rubbing soft circles on your back and kissing the top of your head. How he wasn’t afraid to cry at the sad and ugly parts, but how’d he laugh and make jokes at the other parts. The way he’d run to cover Luke and Nate’s eyes when a kiss scene would appear on the screen. You would give everything back for just one more night like that, to be back in his toned arms where it felt like home.
You feel tears start to slide down your cheeks, as you zone back into reality, your dad and Patty still conversing with each other. and before you know it Olivia and Kelsie are guiding you up to your room, away from the party and guests outside. 
“y/n, come on, you know you can talk to us,” Kelsie coos rubbing your back as silent tears stroll down your cheeks.
“I just d-didn’t think seeing h-him would be this h-hard,” you hiccup, a loud sob escaping your mouth.
Olivia pulls you into a hug, “oh honey,” Kelsie joins in, rubbing your tears away.
“I don’t know why, but I just really miss him still,” you cry out, finally letting all your built up emotions pour out as you bury your face in Olivia's shoulder, your two best friends just holding you close and wiping your tears as they fall. 
~*~
Patty 🥰
I’ll come pick u up after practice
y/n
What time?
Patty 🥰
7 i’ll see u soon baby i love you sm
y/n
I love you too patty
You put your phone down on the counter, trying to hide the inevitable smile that was occupying your face.
“Why are you so happy?” Your mom asks coming into the kitchen, “Something with Pat, huh?” she asks, laughing to herself as she goes over to wash some dishes.
You open the refrigerator to get some orange juice, “we’re going on a picnic tonight for our two year anniversary.” 
“Oh, how sweet, do we need to get anything for your picnic?”
“No, he said he’s got everything taken care of”
Your mom nods, going over to the stove to dry her hands on the towel that hangs off the oven door. “And what did we get lover boy for your anniversary?”
You take a sip of your orange juice, “I made him a scrapbook of everything that’s happened in the last two years between us and at the back i wrote him a letter,” you explain to your mom how you made sure to include all the cringey parts from the beginning of your relationship, like the time you tried to impress him at the eighth grade dance by wearing heels you could not walk in to save your life. 
She smiles, “I’m sure he’s going to love that, it sounds very sweet y/n.”
“Thanks mama,” you say, leaning into her side as she presses a kiss to the top of your head.
“What are we wearing tonight?” she asks, fashion was always your mom’s favorite thing and she was ecstatic when she found out she was having a baby girl so that she could dress you up all cute and do your hair. 
You shrug your shoulders, “I haven’t really figured that out yet,”
Your mom glances at the clock on the wall, “Well his practice is over soon, so why don’t we go look at some outfit options.” you follow your mom up to your room and she instantly goes to your closet searching through the thousands and thousands of clothes that occupied the hangers and shelves.
You sigh, “I don’t know what he’s wearing though, like I don’t want to be too dressed up but I don’t want to look like a slob either,”
Your mom nods, “Well, a little birdie told me what he packed in his bag to wear, and I think this dress would be just darling on you tonight,” your mom says holding up your long sleeve yellow dress with the pink and white little daisies printed on it. “And wear it with those brown slide on sandals, you know, the ones we got last month.”
You smile up at her, “thanks mom,” you say getting off your bed and grabbing the dress from her and heading into your bathroom to change. You smooth the dress over your body and start straightening your hair. By the time you’re done getting ready you hear the doorbell ring and you feel the butterflies in your stomach take off. You run into your room and slide your shoes on before grabbing Patty’s gift and running downstairs.
Patrick is standing in the foyer talking to your dad. You’re happy to see that Patty is also dressed nicely for the occasion.
“Luke, Nate, and I are making nachos and watching some baseball, Mrs. y/l/n has book club tonight so we’re having a boys night,”
Pat smiles, “Ah nice, yeah my dad and I definitely had our fair share of those when the girls all left,” He laughs, glancing up at the stairs before looking back over at your dad. His eyes dart back over to you as his jaw drops, a light blush creeping up on his cheeks. 
 Your dad pats his shoulder, “Be safe tonight, okay, and don’t do anything stupid. Make good choices, alright?” He points his finger at Pat before planting a kiss on the top of your head and walking into the living room where your brothers are. 
Pat smiles down at you, “you look absolutely stunning,” 
You blush smacking his shoulder playfully, “you don’t look too bad yourself moynihan,”
He laughs, grabbing your hand and leading you out to his car. On the car ride Pat is telling you about his last practice with Nobles, how their last game is coming up on Tuesday, and how you totally have to be there for it.
“You know I wouldn’t miss it for the world,” you say reassuringly
He smiles, pulling into a parking spot, “So, the spot i found for us is a little bit of a walk, but uh, it’s not too far.”
You nod, “okie dokie,”
Pat grabs the picnic basket and grabs your hand, interlacing your fingers with his, as he guides you down the paved path towards the little pond in the nature preserve. Patty lays out the picnic blanket in front of the pond, and the two of you find yourselves smiling and talking about everything and anything over your peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and strawberries. You slide the scrapbook you made over to him, and you see a wide smile, the one you’ve come to love so much, spread upon his face. He opens it up and starts looking at all the pages, documenting your love story from eighth grade to now. 
“Thank you, baby,” he smiles, closing the scrapbook and digging deep into his pocket. “Here, give me your arm,” he says as you hold your arm out to him. He takes out a bracelet that he clasps around your wrist. You look down and smile at the infinity chain bracelet that now adorned your wrist.
“You have my heart forever and always baby,” he says, putting his hand on top of yours.
You lean over and press a kiss to his cheek, “I don’t know what I did to deserve you, but I’m so lucky to have you in my life.” 
You find yourselves lying on your backs, hand in hand, looking up at the sky, the sun almost disappearing, as the sky was a canvas of pinks, blues, and oranges. This night was everything you asked for and more, you felt like you were on top of the world, and to top it all off you had the best guy in the entire world by your side. Hours pass by and you and Pat find yourselves snuggled up, looking at the night sky and stargazing.
“Look it’s the big dipper,” he laughs, lifting his arm up and pointing at a constellation.
You giggle, hiding your face in his chest, “Pattt, that’s orion’s belt, oh my gosh,” 
He laughs, looking down at you with adoration filled in his eyes. His eyes flick down to your lips and back up to your e/c eyes before leaning in and placing a soft and slow kiss to your lips. You smile into the kiss, readjusting so you’re straddled over his hips. Patty’s lips trail down your skin, peppering your neck with kisses as he nips at the skin just above your collarbone. Your hands find themselves tangled in his hair, tugging loosely at the ends. Pat’s hands slide up your dress and rest on your bare skin as he kisses back up your neck before pressing a passionate kiss to your lips. 
Patrick turns you over as he lifts your dress up and over your head, before reconnecting his lips to yours. You feel him growing hard above your throbbing core, you grind your hips against him and he lets out a throaty groan, letting his hands roam your body. You two separate for a moment, your forehead pressed against his, your breathing hard and heavy.
“You’re sure this is okay?” he asks, sincerity filling his voice.
You nod your head, “I love you patrick,” you say as you pull his shirt off, pulling him into a deep kiss. His hands move down to kick off his khakis as he trails kisses down your skin, “I love you too baby girl,” he hums against your skin. The small, quiet whimpers leaving your mouth causing Patty to smile against your skin. He presses a final kiss to your abdomen before sliding your underwear down to your legs and inserting two fingers into you. You let out a soft moan, digging your nails into his biceps as he thrusts his fingers in and out of you, quickening his pace. You feel a knot forming in your stomach as you squint your eyes shut. Patty removes his fingers before sucking on them. 
“Patty,” you whine
He smiles at your desperation as he nonchalantly removes himself from his boxers before lining up with your entrance and thrusting in. He sucks on the skin of your neck as he continues his thrusts, tiny grunts escaping his mouth as you moan out his name. 
“Patty, harder,” you grumble as you tug on his hair.
He’s biting down particularly hard as he pushes harder. You start lifting your hips up to meet his thrusts making it easier for him. 
“You’re so good baby,” he mumbles against your skin, his thrusts getting sloppier and sloppier, “I know you’re almost there, baby girl.” The knot in your stomach tightens, as you release, a throaty moan leaving your lips. Patty smiles, kissing up your neck and kissing you on the lips once more. His pace continues until he’s releasing into you, planting kisses all over your skin. 
“Happy two years y/n, I can’t wait to spend the next eighty with you by my side,”
~*~
Olivia and Kelsie convince you to leave your room after you’ve calmed down a little.  “Come on, you need to eat, okay? It’ll make you feel better.”
“And we’ll be there the whole time to keep you distracted!” Kelsie pipes in, the two girls guiding you back outside. 
You grab a plate of some of your mom’s famous mashed potatoes and a cheeseburger heading over to the seat at the table in between Liv and Kels.
“Oh my gosh, did I show you the dress my sister picked for her wedding?” Kelsie squeals, grabbing her phone and scrolling through her text messages. You and Liv share a knowing look before hovering over Kelsie’s screen.
“Oh my gosh, that’s beautiful!” you and Liv say in unison. 
Kelsie locks her screen, “42 dresses later, right?” she laughs, continuing to fill you two in on all the wedding details. You hear your little brothers squeal and you whip your head around on instinct. Upon doing so you lock eyes with him for the first time since he turned around, walked out, and never came back. You feel everything around you freeze, your breath hitches in your throat, and the cup of water in your hand falls to the table and spills. All the hurt and pain comes creeping back into your life as you lose yourself in his clear blue eyes. You feel a tear slide down your cheek as you remember the beginning of the end, where everything started to fall apart. And once again, you begin to wonder how you could have saved your relationship with the only man you ever wanted to be with.
~*~
After months of begging, your parents finally agreed to let you fly out to Michigan on your fall break so that you could see Patrick. It was his final year with the ntdp before leaving for college, and you and some of his teammates were at a diner grabbing some food after one of their games. It’s all fun and games, his teammates and their girlfriends quickly growing fond of you and including you in all the jokes. 
Next to you Chelsea taps Fran’s shoulder, “look who it is,” she says, rolling her eyes at the group of beautiful, tall, skinny, blondes that come strolling into the diner. You turn and look at her, “Who are those girls?” 
Fran laughs, shaking her head, “They’re the popular group at school, think they own the place.” you wrinkle up your nose, knowing a handful of girls like that at your own school. 
You go to tell Patty something and that’s when you notice him checking out one of the girls, his eyes following her as she bends down to pick up her dropped phone. You swallow the lump that formed in your throat, blinking away the tears, as you shove a fork full of mac-n-cheese into your mouth. You couldn’t understand how every other guy at the table couldn’t care less about the group of stunning blondes that strolled in, but your boyfriend of four years couldn’t get enough of them. 
Back at his billet house the two of you are alone up in his room, scrolling through netflix to find something to watch.
“y/n what’s wrong? You’ve barely said a word to me all night.”
You shrug, scrolling through instagram on your phone.
He throws himself down on his bed, leaning over to press a kiss to your cheek but you turn away from him.
“What the fuck, babe, what’s going on?”
“Oh, I don’t know, maybe the fact that my boyfriend paid more attention to the stuck up blonde bitch at the diner than me all night” you retort
He looks taken aback, “what the hell are you even talking about?” his tone getting defensive.
You give him an ‘oh come on’ face, “really pat? You had googly eyes, motherfucking googly eyes at her and she winked at you. Winked. Did you think I wouldn't notice?”
Patrick scoffs beside you, “oh and you’re just a saint, right? You never look at any guys because you’re innocent and you’re totally committed to me”
“Are you seriously trying to turn this on me right now?”
“Don’t think I don’t know about aaron the infamous soccer player,”
“Jesus christ, I was failing biology and he was my tutor, there was nothing ever going on between us” you huff.
“I don’t get why you’re getting so upset right now, so what i checked out another girl?”
“You don’t get why i’m getting upset? Patrick, you promised me you would stay loyal to me and the minute I get here you’re looking at any other girl you can find. Am i that big of a joke to you?” the tears come streaming down your cheeks and Patty pulls you into a hug, you sobbing into his chest. 
“Baby, i’m sorry, I didn’t mean it, okay? I’m not going anywhere.”
~*~
You, Olivia, and Kelsie are gathered at the fire pit, roasting some marshmallows for s’mores when you look over to find Luke and Nate playing cornhole with Patty. You smile softly, knowing how much your brothers adored him and looked up to him. You swear, the amount of times you heard one of them say they want to be just like Patty when they grow up was too many to count. 
Kelsie starts talking about her dorm assignment for the following school year and how she got the bad dorm, and Olivia sympathizes with her. The three of you bounce around your favorite high school memories, sometimes gossiping about random kids in your grade.
“Oh my god, did you guys see Marty and Miranda had a baby and now they’re engaged?” 
“What the actual fuck” olivia laughs, smushing her marshmallow between chocolate and graham crackers. 
You steal another look at Patty and see your brothers dangling from his arms, a wide grin on his face. 
“Higher Patty,” they cheer as Patrick lifts his arms higher and higher, giggles and screams flooding from their mouths. Patrick drops his arms suddenly and the two young boys squeal, as he begins to lift his arms up once again. 
He lifts his head up, seeing you watching him, and offers a smile your way. You nod your head, turning back to Kelsie and Olivia who are now talking about the vacation the three of you have planned in late July.
“y/n, did you find a cute swimsuit yet for our Bora Bora trip?”
You shake your head, “no, we’ll have to go to the mall and get one. I need your opinion anyway”
Your eyes wander back over to Patty and your brothers who are now playing a game of tag.
“Oh my god,” olivia gushes.
“What” you and Kelsie ask impatiently,
Olivia goes red, “uh, nothing” she says going to toast another marshmallow.
“No, tell us!” you laugh
Kelsie smiles, “wait, awww”
“What,” you groan
“y/n, he’s stealing glances at you as he’s playing with Luke and Nate”
~*~
You and Patrick were sprawled across his family room couch watching Marley and Me with his sisters. You and Pat couldn’t help the uncontrollable laughter that escaped your lips.
“Would you two quit it?” Cayley hisses, throwing a pillow at the two of you.
“Sorry,” you giggle, handing your phone to Patty who chuckles and throws his head back at the picture on your screen.
“Shut up,” Ciara shouts, whipping her slipper at him.
“Stop, they’re in love” Corey says
“God, they make me sick,” Ciara groans.
You and Patty ignore them, “want to go back up to my room?”
Ciara gags, “ew, please don’t be too loud”
“Use protection, I’m too young to be an aunt” Cayley calls out.
Patty flips them off as he snakes his arm around your waist, guiding you up to his room.
Once you’re up there you jump onto his bed sprawling out in the middle of it. Patty lies down on top of you, “did you bring the goods?”
You laugh, “yes, they’re in my bag” 
He rolls over and grabs your bag, pulling it into his lap and sifting through the contents. He smiles pulling out your one direction t-shirt, a head band, and a denim skirt. “Oh yes,” he smiles.
“Okay, but where’s mine?” you say, sitting up excitedly. 
Patty leans over the side of his bed and grabs a pile of his clothes, throwing it up to you.
You smile, “your Nobles hockey sweatshirt, your nike sweatpants, and a bruins hat? Perfect!” 
The two of you spend the rest of the afternoon talking about how excited you are for the halloween party at one of his teammate’s houses while watching Mulan on the tv that stood on his dresser. 
“Mulan saved china,” he mumbles,
You smile, poking his cheek, “yeah, and you can’t even score a goal against the easiest team in the conference”
He squeezes your sides and you squeal, “i���m kidding, you definitely did score a goal that the ref decided was off of a penalty so they took it away”
“That’s right, but holy shit she saved china”
You laugh, shaking your head, snuggling into his chest.
You wake from your nap to Patty shaking you lightly. 
“Good evening sleeping beauty,” he jokes,
You smile, rubbing at your eyes and sitting up, “hi,”
Pat stands up, “we should probably get our costumes on so we can head over to the party,”
You stand up, replacing your clothes with patty’s clothes he picked out for you and he does the same. He laughs looking at you, “aren’t we just the cutest couple”
You smile as if you’re a five year old on her birthday, “no one will know who is who! This is the best costume idea ever!”
When you two burst through the door of his teammate’s house, Patty is strutting, shaking his hips side to side as you attempt to walk, shaking your shoulders like you see all the boys at school do. 
“would you look at the golden couple” someone shouts as all eyes fall onto you and Patty.
~*~
When Patty told you that he was able to be home for your prom, you were beyond excited. All of your friends had dates and you really didn’t want to be the only one that didn’t have a guy to go with. 
You, Liv, and Kelsie were in Olivia’s room, curling your hair, doing make-up, and painting nails. The three of you had had a sleepover the previous night to make today easier. 
“I can’t wait for pictures,” Kelsie says, pulling out her tube of mascara
Olivia starts fanning her hand over her toe nails, “I can’t wait to see the guys,” she laughs
You smile, “I’m just happy to see Patty again,”
“See, this is why I want a boyfriend. That’s cute, and what? I’m going to prom with the senior quarterback and I’ll never hear from him again!” Kelsie laughs.
The three of you finish fine tuning your look before going and getting your dresses on. You have Olivia zip up your blush pink ball gown prom dress that’s decorated with a silver beaded sash around your waist. You smile as you slip on your heels, and look in the mirror at the three of you, “wow, we look so good” Kelsie smiles, snapping a photo.
The three of you walk outside to the waterfall fountain in Olivia’s backyard. Your heart skips a beat when you see Patrick, his hair was longer than you remember, but he still looked as charming as ever. Patrick looks up and sees you fast approaching and his face grows soft, a deep red brushing his cheeks, his tongue darting out to wet his lips. He pecks your lips, “you look beautiful y/n”
You, Pat, Liv, Kels, and their dates are dancing on the dance floor, laughing and having the time of your lives when Perfect by ed sheeran starts to play. You and Patty freeze, as he places his hands on your hips, your arms going up and wrapping around his neck. The two of you gently sway to the music and he presses his forehead to yours.
“I’m so happy you were able to come tonight Patty,”
“I wouldn’t have missed it for the world,”
“You’ve really made me feel like a princess tonight” you laugh, suddenly feeling goofy for saying that.
He laughs, “good, you deserve to feel like a princess every day” 
You tilt your head up and kiss him gently. There’s nothing more that you could ever want than to be here in his arms, on this perfect night.
“I can’t wait for our wedding night,”
~*~
You once again found yourself in Michigan visiting Patty for spring break. After one of his home games the two of you find yourselves sitting in his car in the parking lot of the hotel you were staying at. You weren’t sure what it was, but there was some sort of tension between the two of you that made you worried.
“Patty, i know you lost the game and you’re upset, but come on, what’s wrong?”
“I hate when you fucking call me that” he snaps, his voice cold and sharp.
You look at him confused, “o-oh, sorry,”
He pulls out his phone, tilting the screen away from you as he types out a fast text message and puts his phone away again.
“Why do you keep coming out here to visit?”
“What do you mean? You’re my boyfriend and I miss you, of course i’d come and visit you,” you notice him flinch at the word boyfriend and you place your hand on his, “Patt-” he pulls his hand away and tears sting your eyes, “wh-what’s going on?”
He scratches his head looking out his window, mumbling something under his breath.
“I can’t hear you,”
“I said I fucking cheated, what do you want me to go and scream it to the world,” he rolls down his window leaning his head out of it, “HEY EVERYONE I CHEATED ON Y/N” he yells. In that moment it feels like someone is suffocating you, and you can’t breathe.
You feel hot tears spill down your cheeks, “why?” you somehow manage croak out
He turns to look at you, his eyes watering up at the sight of you for an instant before he goes back to suppressing his emotions, “I don’t know,” 
“You. don’t. Know.” you say hitting him hard on the chest after each word, “how can you not know? What’d you do? You didn’t go all the way, did you? You didn’t kiss her, did you?”
His lack of an answer is enough for you to know that he betrayed you and went against everything he ever promised you.
“What the hell patrick, how could you? You promised me forever”
“I never loved you, you know that right?”
“Do you even hear yourself right now”
“You know the funny thing y/n? You sit there and act like you’re so perfect, like you have everything together, that no matter what happens in this world you’re going to come out on top.”
“I-is that r-really what you think of me?” you cry out.
He holds up his finger, “But I know what you’re really like. You act like such a saint because you’re scared people are going to find out how big of a slut you really are.”
“Excuse me? You’re the one that fucking slept with someone else while I was back home in Millis 100% devoted to you Patrick.” you scream,
“Yeah, well at least i don’t act like everyone is in love with me. After this, you’ll have no one. No one.”
“Shut the fuck up patrick”
“I can’t believe I wasted all this time on you”
You sit there in disbelief, your cheeks stained with tears, anger boiling inside you. “So what, we’re together for four and a half years and you’re just going to throw it all away? You don’t even want to try and fix it?”
“Jesus christ y/n get it through your head, there’s nothing worthwhile to fix”
You cry out ugly sobs, “Patrick, please, no, please don’t do this. Please don’t go. I’m sorry, please tell me what i did wrong, i promise i’ll make it better.”
He shakes his head, starting the car, “it’s over, okay? I don’t love you.”
Your hand is shaky as you place it on the door handle, “patty, i’m so sorry,” you say before getting out of the car and running into the hotel, not even bothering to look back at him.
Watching the best part of his life walk away, Patty drops his head into his hands, finally letting out his own tears fall as loud sobs fall from his mouth. “Mom, i really need you right now,” he cries into the phone.
~*~
“y/n,” a familiar voice sings, “y/n? Earth to y/n” you turn your head and see patrick. 
“Oh. um, hi?” 
He smiles, “hey, uh, can we go inside and talk?” 
You look over at Olivia and Kelsie who nod at you encouragingly. “Sure, I guess,” you say, standing up and walking back up to your house. Patrick follows close behind and when you stop in the middle of your living room and stare at him expectantly he just stands there.
“Well, what did you want?”
“I miss you” he blurts out and you’re instantly shocked.
You regain your composure, “It’s a little too late for that,” you go to walk past him, back outside, but he’s quick to grab your arm. “y/n, wait, please just hear me out”
You stand there and wait for him to go on. He takes a shaky breath before continuing, “y/n i love you, i still do, hell i always have. I treated you like crap and i’m sorry, but i know it’s me and you in the end, just like we always said. And we’ll have kids and grow old together, like we talked about, and we’ll travel all over europe like we planned-”
You interrupt him, “Patrick, stop.”
“Baby, please,” he begs, “you know if i could go back and do it all over again with you, i would in a heartbeat.”
~*~
Back in Millis, you felt more alone than ever even though you were surrounded by your family and friends. You just felt so broken, and you can’t help but think that maybe, just maybe, love isn’t real. If patty could get up and walk out on you after everything, you knew love couldn’t be real. 
y/n 
Hey, how are you? It’s been a while…
Your mom comes up and knocks on your door, “hey honey,” she says, coming in and sitting beside you on your bed.
You start sobbing hysterically, “mom, i really miss him”
She rubs your back, “i know you do sweetie, i know you do. But if it’s meant to be you guys will get back together,”
“Mom we were going to get married, you know that right? We talked about it, we made plans to stay in Millis and raise a family, we even picked out the house we wanted,”
“Oh honey”
“And when I looked in his eyes I saw the next eighty years of my life. I don’t want to be with anyone if it’s not him.”
“y/n, you’re young, you’re only 18. There are going to be so many other guys out there, and you’re going to Tufts in the fall. Honey, Patty isn’t the whole world”
“Mom, he’s my whole world though”
Your mom wipes away some of your tears, “honey, he’s just one guy, and there are going to be so many other guys out there. You are beautiful, talented, smart, and extremely kind. Any boy would be beyond lucky to have you, do you hear me?”
You nod your head as your mom kisses the top of your head, “i’m going to go cook some dinner, okay, i’ll call you when it’s ready.”
y/n
Patrick, please. I just feel so alone. And you’re right, i have no one. Please can we try and fix it?
You wipe more tears away as you wait for a text back. When nothing happens you try calling him, “hey it’s pat, sorry i missed you but if you leave a message i’ll call you back”
You break down at the sound of his voice, remembering all the nights you heard that same voice whispering sweet nothings in your ear, goosebumps crawling all over your skin. 
y/n
Patty please, i’m so broken
y/n
I miss you
y/n
Please come back, i need you here with me
y/n
Please, i love you
Patty 🥰
y/n stop contacting me.
You chuck your phone across your room, falling into your pillow to muffle the loud sobs that were escaping your body, and that’s when it finally hits you: Patrick Moynihan was gone and out of your life for good.
~*~
“Patty, I’m sorry. You know i love you, i always have and i always will. But i just can’t do this again.”
“y/n, please, just give me a second chance. I’ve changed, I can be the guy you’ve always deserved to be with. I can be that guy, just, please, give me a chance.”
“Patty, we both agreed I wasn’t good enough for you, remember?”
His eyes start to water up, but he’s quick to shrug it off, “baby, please...”
The tears start falling down your cheeks and he goes to wipe them away but you turn from his touch, “Patty, I’m sorry. But it’s better this way,” you go to walk back out to the backyard, leaving Patrick in the middle of your family room realizing he really messed up and he didn’t know how to get you back, but all he knew was that he needed you in his life.
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