#i was definitely just burned out on kh when i played it for the first time in 2019

[aggressionbread]

after replaying dream drop distance with my bf, i can confidently say its a good game and i really like it!

[lilyginnyblackv2]

Just some thoughts on the new Steam trailers and promo stuff.

I just watched the Steam trailer announcement for the KH series...and they made it really het/S*kai focused. It's very gen/friendship focused as well, but they seriously somehow were even able to make the DDD section of the trailer very not gay and just very gen/friendship based.

Here is the Steam Announcement Video:

The two short KH is on Steam trailers on Utada's YT page are more for promoting the re-recordings of Hikari and Simple & Clean, but they are fairly het/S*kai and general friendship focused as well. Though, Hikari's promo works better with they lyrics, timing, and lyrical meanings than Simple & Clean.

(More under the Read More due to length).

Here are the two promos to compare. First, Hikari:

In this version we have the lyrics break down like this:

どんな時だって (donna toki datte) - No matter when it is

From KH1 Sora to Sora in Castle Oblivion, just before battling Marluxia (who's in the background) from the KH2 OP

ずっと二人で (zutto futari de) - We'll always be together

From Axel in the DDD OP to the Time Station shattering around Ven from the BBS OP

どんな時だって (donna toki datte) - No matter when it is

From Aqua holding a frozen Ven and looking up at the blue "Kingdom Heart" in the sky (BBS OP) to the Back Cover stuff

側にいるから (soba in iru kara) - I'll always be by your side

From YX looking at the night sky out the window (KH3 OP) to Sora & Kairi sitting together from the KH3 ending

君という光が (kimi to iu hikari ga...) - The light known as "you"....

This last bit starts as the titles that are going to be released on Steam start to appear on the screen (there are spinning heart shapes that appear over the image, and those turn into the titles), which turns to a plain black screen and info on the release dates, games, etc.

The Simple & Clean take on this promo is definitely a bit more awkward timing and lyrics-wise. It doesn't work as well, though, both promos don't really highlight the bond between Sora and Riku like at all, but highlight the bond between Sora and Kairi, along with just gen friendships in general (which I like and don't mind).

Here is the Simple & Clean Re-recording + Steam promo:

I don't know. Obviously, they are focusing on the whole series as a whole, which makes sense and the more gen focused stuff for nearly all the characters makes sense and I like and appreciate that. But, it just feels weird to see/have so little of Riku and have the video end with the S*kai stuff, since that relationship is just so underexplored, underdeveloped, and often times just straight up ignored in a lot of the games/Sora's overall journey.

Also, while I'm a fan of Soriku, I don't really care for a number of the big theories out there that exist (some of which, like the whole aitsu thing, has been debunked, and I just find the whole "Sora forgot about Riku" theory to be a theory more so created to cope with the reality that the series is trying to push S*kai more now...even if there are a lot of issues with that from a writing perspective). IDK, but when I see stuff like this...when I played KH3...they all just kind of worked as reminders to keep my expectations in check. I might just be too burned by past media experiences, but a large part of me still believes that the closest we might ever get to canon Soriku is a realization and confirmation on Riku's part that he loves Sora, but S*kai still ends up happening because of "I want my lover to be happy" type trope stuff.

At the very least, I'm happy that we got largely gen and friendship based trailers and promos with all of this, instead of all of the imagery being like "potential het couples" type stuff, lol. But yeah, this is probably an overreaction, but KH3 is a game that really killed my love for the franchise and makes me very hesitant, skeptical, and cynical of KH4 along with the franchise going forward in general. So these promos just don't help at all with that.

[akumastrife]

✨️ 🌈 🌻 🎀 🎉 🍭 🎙 💌

babe thank you so much

✨What's a fic you've posted you wish you could breathe life into again and have people talking about it? (or simply a fic you wish got more credit)

No Price Too Great; No Distance Too Far the rarepair raven cycle medieval au I wrote for a bigbang (my first and last)! Its 40k, all the things I like to write, with a bunch of flowery metaphors and 97% just yearning okay. It was a lot of work, a lot of love, but unfortunately seems to be too self-indulgent to be a fandom hit.

🌈is there a fic that you worked *really fucking hard on* that no one would ever know? maybe a scene/theme you struggled with?

The Coral Isle Alliance, the teen wolf Scott/Danny fantasy kingdom au. I struggled with it because originally I wanted it to be 8 chapters, and a sweeping epic of found family, slow burn, and dreamy aesthetics. But... It sat in my drafts for over a year and I got overwhelmed when I didn't have all the story figured out. There was definitely a mental block that I think in part was because already I knew deep down it was only for me and very few people were even going to read it.

So I took everything I had already written and crunched it down into a one shot, and tbh that was all it needed to be.

🌻what makes you want to give up on writing? what makes you keep going?

lack of engagement definitely makes my desire to write fic very low, and i've been struggling with that for several years now. I enjoy fic and enjoy rarepairs/tropes that I know I'll have to write myself to have, and there's many fics started on my computer. But engagement has deceased so much across fandom in the last 6-7 years and tbh the effort I know I'll end up putting into it to not really get any feedback? It's bleak man. Makes it harder and harder to justify the time when I have original novels I want to write for publication as well.

But I keep writing, and I keep thinking of new aus and fic I probably will never write because I enjoy the creativity of fandom and I have a lot of feelings about characters I don't know what to do with otherwise. Fandom was pivotal for my adolescence, and definitely shaped the way I engage with art. I want to contribute to it, it's just how I am.



🎀give yourself a compliment about your own writing

I feel like I'm really honing my ability to weave emotional impact into the narrative! I can't draw the moment of anguish on a characters face, but I'm gonna try to convey it in a paragraph anyway!

🎉how often do you celebrate completing & posting a work? how often do you give yourself the credit/validation that you seek from others when you post? (if you don't, you should!)

Oh. Oh, well, I.. don't, i guess? I suppose posting is the reward, as in, the relief of having finished something (something I struggle with.)

How do you all celebrate a posted fic? Clearly I need ideas! =3

🍭why did you start writing?

I've always had the ideas, even before fanfic. And it was never enough to have them, and think about them, there's always been that desire to write them down, flesh them out, truly play around in them. I've been an avid reader since I learned how, and I guess there was always a part of me that liked it so much I wanted to participate.



🎙️which one of your fics would you like someone to make a pod-fic of?

Thematically, I think 'dust devils on the horizon' (Joy cowboy au) would translate really well with the right narrator.

💌share something with us about an up-and-coming work (WIP) that has you excited!

Yes it's true, i'm rewriting (for the 4th time) a KH fic I started 13 years ago that I want to actually finish this time. I'm posting chapters as I finish them, instead of waiting for all of it to be finished so I don't lose motivation but boy its hard.

When i write fic, which is rarer these days, its for me, or whatever my friends want to read.

[aquafolia]

Sokai Day Fic 1: True Love’s Kiss(es)

So yes, I am a Classics/ancient history blog, and this is obviously super different from the content I normally post on this blog. Please forgive me, but I’ve recently become OBSESSED with Kingdom Hearts and I have nowhere else to post this stuff at the moment. So please forgive me, normal content will resume soon!

Anyway, as I said I just started playing the KH games for the first time this summer and it’s been so much fun. And seeing all the amazing stories and artwork in this fandom has inspired me to write some stuff too. Anyway, I’m Holly, and I hope y’all enjoy :)

--------------------------

True Love’s Kiss(es)

‘Ugh!’ Kairi groaned, unceremoniously setting down the basket she held in her hands. ‘I forgot that when you pick apples, you have to actually carry them all back, too!’

‘Your basket’s not even half full, Kairi,’ Sora remarked, ‘and we’ve only just started!’

She grinned. ‘Well then, it’s a good thing I have a strong, manly boyfriend to help me carry all of these.’

He could hardly argue with that. Sora feigned displeasure by rolling his eyes and letting out a dramatic groan, which made Kairi giggle. But then he walked over to her, grabbing one of the basket’s handles as she grabbed the other, and the pair made their way deeper down the rows of apple trees. They could hear the distant shouts and laughs of their friends echoing through the orchard as they went. Apparently, Twilight Town– a world basically in perpetual autumn–  was known for its fall festivities, including its legendary apple orchards. Once they’d visited the orchards, the gang hoped Remi would help them make apple pies, apple cider, and all sorts of goodies during their visit. To that end, the group had decided to break up into teams in order to pick as many apples as they could carry. Today, Sora and Kairi were paired up. But Sora knew that if they only returned with a measly half basket of apples, the others would surely tease them, accuse them of slacking off.

They wouldn’t be totally wrong, Sora thought with a grin. Sure, Kairi was determined to focus on their task: she was deep in concentration, examining each apple carefully before deciding to place it in her basket. Sora, on the other hand, was much more determined to get Kairi off task. It wasn’t that Sora didn’t want to help out, but this was an opportunity for him and Kairi to spend some time alone– that was a temptation greater than any fruit, in Sora’s world.

Kairi set her sights on a shiny red apple that hung high on a nearby tree. She stood up on her tiptoes, making adorable little noises as she tried to grab it. Sora was staring intently, but not at the apple: Kairi’s form was stretched out in front of him as she reached high over her head, accentuating her curves, and Sora was mesmerized. It was only when she said his name that he snapped out of his trance: ‘Sora,’ she called out, not taking her eyes off the fruit, ‘would you come over and help me with this one? You should be able to–’

Kairi shrieked as Sora, having silently moved behind her, wrapped his arms around her legs and hoisted her up onto his shoulder.

‘Tall enough now?’ he asked casually.

Her surprised squeak was the only reply Kairi could muster. Once she’d successfully picked the apple, Sora released her hips. He held her by the waist as her body slid down his until she landed gently on the ground. Even in the autumn chill, Sora could feel his cheeks burning.

Having regained some of her composure, with a giggle, Kairi said, ‘Guess we make a pretty good team, huh?’ before she turned to the next tree. Sora tried to hide it by replying with a level ‘Absolutely,’ but inside, he was beaming: watching the effect he had on Kairi just never got old for him– but given how hard he had to try to appear cool and unfazed, it wasn’t like he was much better than she was.

Now that he’d had his fun, Sora walked up next to Kairi to help out. The pair picked apples side by side, happily chatting and admiring each other's finds, and over time, their basket filled with bright red apples. While they worked, something about the orchard nagged at Sora’s mind, but he couldn't place it. As he studied a large, blood-red apple in his hands, it finally clicked.

‘All these apples remind me of Snow White,’ Sora remarked. ‘Aqua told me how Snow White’s evil stepmother tried to kill her by getting her to eat a poisoned apple. The dwarves thought she was dead, so they placed her in a beautiful glass casket,’ Sora recalled, his eyes still fixed on the apple. He found himself absentmindedly tracing the spot on his chest where a scar marred the skin over his heart: the permanent reminder of his sacrifice for Kairi– well, his first one, anyway.

‘But she wasn’t dead,’ Sora continued, thought bleeding into memory. ‘She was asleep, and she couldn’t wake up…’

‘Until her true love saved her.’

That broke Sora out of his reverie. He looked up to find Kairi already gazing at him, her eyes soft and sincere. Sora replied, ‘Yeah… Reminds me of another princess I know.’

Did she really mean…?  They’d talked about their first adventure numerous times before, but she’d never said it like that.

‘I would have killed for a nice bed to sleep on,’ she continued. ‘You and Riku took me on quite a journey– napping peacefully in a meadow sounds pretty good to me,’ Kairi said with a grin.

A breeze drifted through the orchard, rustling the leaves over their heads. ‘I remember your dad telling us all those old fairy tales when we were kids,’ Sora said. ‘After all the adventures we’ve had… it’s strange to think we sort of became one ourselves.’

‘They’re not always as fun to live as they are to hear…’ Kairi remarked, almost to herself, ‘when you don’t know if there’ll be a happy ending after all.’ Her eyes grew distant, drifting aimlessly down the row of apple trees.  ‘I… I still remember waking up at Hollow Bastion, seeing that Keyblade in your chest… And then how you–’ she started, but then faltered, unable to bring herself to say what came next.

Sora gently placed a hand on her shoulder, turning her to face him. She still seemed lost in thought, not meeting his eyes. ‘I know what you mean. But we did get one, didn’t we, Kairi? It took a while, and we’ve had to find each other again and again, but now you’re here. And thanks to you, I’m here. We’re finally together, and nothing is ever going to change that. That’s the best ‘happily ever after’ I could have wished for.’

The pair were alone, the trees standing sentry around them, but his voice grew softer all the same: these words were just for her. ‘All that doesn’t really matter anymore,’ Sora continued. ‘What I mean is… what matters is that we’re here now. That means it was all worth it.’ He took her hand, interlacing their fingers. ‘Back at Hollow Bastion, when I saw your eyes open just before mine closed, when I knew your heart was safe… it was worth it, Kairi.’

She finally looked up at him. Sora hoped his eyes conveyed the sincerity of his words: It had all been for her– and it had all been worth it, every moment. Every time Sora got to see her sweet smile, got to hear her lovely laugh, it was worth it. And now, he wasn’t just connected to her across the worlds by promises and oaths– if he wanted to find Kairi, all Sora had to do was reach for her hand. How was that not a dream come true?

A small smile forming on her lips, Kairi gave him a look of such love and gratitude that Sora knew she felt the same. ‘It just makes our time together now even more precious to me,’ she finally said, giving his hand a gentle squeeze. ‘I’m never going to take this for granted.’

Sora decided then to gather her into his arms and bring her close, her head resting in the crook of his neck, his cheek on her soft hair. ‘You know,’ he started after a pause, ‘I have to admit, when I heard Snow White’s story, I got a bit jealous.’

Kairi pulled back just enough to shoot him a quizzical look. ‘Jealous?’

‘Yeah, of Prince Florian. All he had to do to wake up Snow White and save the day was kiss her– pretty nice deal, if you ask me,’ Sora explained. Kairi smiled, but her eyes were still a bit sad. So he continued, a grin spreading across his face, ‘Don’t know why I didn’t think to try that first…’

‘Oh, Sora!’ Kairi giggled, giving Sora a playful smack on his arm, her face brighter. ‘What, does that mean you thought about kissing Ven at some point, too?’ she countered.

‘I was getting so desperate to find the Power of Waking, I just might have!’ Sora replied, and they both laughed again. Keeping one arm around Kairi, he took a bite from the apple still in his hand. It was crisp and fresh, and amazingly sweet– it was just right, like everything else in this moment.

Suddenly, with a smirk on her face, Kairi plucked the half-eaten apple from Sora’s hand. She lifted the fruit to her lips, holding Sora’s gaze as she took a large bite next to where he’d just bitten, a small drop of juice running down her chin as she chewed. All Sora could do was watch her, hopelessly mesmerized. It was bold, yet playful– Kairi to a T. Before Sora’s brain could fully resume normal functioning, Kairi said, feigning innocence, ‘What? Isn’t sharing fruit kind of our thing? It’s no paopu fruit, but still…’

Staring into her eyes, the radiant sunset bathing them in soft, warm light, Sora grew bold himself: They’d spent so long in silence, so long apart, why waste any time? He’d fought so hard to find her, to come back to her, over and over again. She was right here– if he wanted to kiss her, what on earth was there to consider? Sora reached a hand forward to cup her cheek, wiping the juice from the corner of her lip with his thumb. Kairi let the gentle pull of his thumb part her lips. ‘It is pretty good,’ Sora said, ‘but… you definitely taste better.’ And with that, he lowered his head and kissed her. He heard the sound of the apple landing on the ground, utterly forgotten, as Kairi’s arms wound around his neck.

And Sora had to admit, kissing Kairi felt pretty magical– Maybe those fairytales were onto something after all.

But of course, the distant sound of Aqua, Ven, and Riku calling out in search of them forced the pair to break their kiss, albeit begrudgingly. Sora expected Kairi to step away, pick up her basket, maybe call out to their friends– but she didn’t. She stayed as she was in Sora’s arms, one hand resting on his shirt, over the scar. Sora could feel his heartbeat racing under her touch. When she looked up at him again, something in her eyes was different. Still happy, but mixed with something else– not just happiness, but a determination to be so.

‘This is a pretty large orchard,’ Kairi remarked, her eyes bright. ‘Our friends probably won’t find us for a little while longer…’

‘We’d better not make them wait too long, or Axel will use his chakrams to–’

Kairi grabbed Sora’s hoodie with both hands and pulled him back down to her lips. For a moment, Sora stood frozen, eyes wide with shock. But as she melted into him, his eyes fluttered closed and he wound his arms around her, each kiss between them less ‘Fairy Godmother Friendly’ than the last. Traditionally, in all those fairytales, the heroes only ever got one ‘True Love’s Kiss.’ Sora considered himself the luckiest prince of all time– he had a never ending supply.

Twilight Town was always just that– hanging in perpetual dusk. So Sora really didn’t know how long he and Kairi spent like that, lost in laughter and kisses and caresses beneath the trees. But once their friends’ voices grew dangerously close, Sora and Kairi managed to untangle themselves, wiping swollen lips, readjusting ruffled clothing, and fixing disheveled hair (not that Sora’s hair had been tidy in the first place– and Kairi burst out laughing when she realized her attempts to smooth it didn’t do much good, either). As Kairi called out to their friends, Sora picked up her basket, now full of delicious looking apples, and the pair began to head back toward the orchard entrance. They probably hadn’t gathered the most apples– and he was sure their friends would point that fact out–  but Sora didn’t care one bit. He wouldn’t have traded this day for anything.

‘Hey Kairi?’ Sora said as they walked, ‘For the record, if I’m ever in a fruit induced coma– or any other kind of coma, really– feel free to make out with me, in order to revive me. Thought I should say so, you know, just in case.’

‘Oh, really?’ She teased back. ‘I’ll make sure to tell Donald– you always complain he never uses Curaga when you need it.’

‘What? No! Ew, gross!’ Sora blanched as Kairi dissolved into laughter. But when his eyes found hers again, he couldn’t help but smile.

As her giggles died out, she replied, 'Okay, I’ll remember that… But that doesn’t mean you can go throw yourself into danger so I’ll kiss you better!’

‘I can’t help it– when you kiss me, I feel like I can do anything,’ Sora answered simply. Kairi’s eyes widened at his remark, and she ducked her head as her cheeks bloomed pink. Sora beamed. He may have been laying it on her thick, but Sora wasn’t lying: He had true love on his side– the most powerful magic of all.

-----

[storm-driver]

*jumps into here* Alright, uhhhhh "Number 3. What is that one scene that you’ve always wanted to write but can’t be arsed to write all of the set-up and context it would need? (consider this permission to write it and/or share it anyway)" I am curious and want to give you one of those questions. PS. I love you 💙

(ilu2 fluffles <3)

oh god there’s plenty of these, but because this is a fandom blog, ill stick to KH ones

I want to recapture that entire sequence where Sora goes to save Aqua and Ventus in KH3. ‘Cause I had ideas for the structure of that whole sequence that might help that emotional impact and pacing feel way better. 

Below the cut because I got a “little” extensive about it 

First of all, the beginning of KH3 is so fuckin’ misleading when it says someone that’s close to Aqua would have to be the one to take the dive and save her. Because that ends up not happening at all, and Sora just does it himself when the plot calls for it. You can argue that it was Ventus’ heart inside Sora that made that possible, but there was zero indication that Ventus had next to any impact on that whole sequence. If he did anything, he was the one that was initially pushing Sora to go to the Realm of Darkness in the first place. But that’s the extent of Ventus’ intervention in Aqua’s situation. 

I initially thought that Sora was going to take the Master’s Defender (Eraqus’ Keyblade) to Castle Oblivion and get Ventus out himself. At least, that’s what I believed when I started playing and remembered the scene from the first ever KH3 trailer where Sora found that old Keyblade on the beach. But that Keyblade was instead used to find Aqua (don’t know...how or why he needed that Keyblade to get to Aqua when all he was missing was a way to get to the Realm of Darkness, but whatever). 

I think towards the end of development, when the writers were done with the Disney worlds and were ready to finalize all the end-game stuff, they might’ve been rushing it. Because the amount of padding out there is in the Disney worlds compared to how little padding there is at the end of KH3 is an EXTREME difference. It’s a mistake that happens often in video game development, especially with big, hyped up titles like this one that have undergone delays and various system changes over the years. 

(In case anyone didn’t know, KH3 was more than likely being developed on Square Enix’s Crystal Tool engine back during 2010-2013, which was proved to be a poor choice when FFXIV crashed and burned using that engine. Which is more than likely why the game was switched to a new engine and development seemed to slog on. This is also the reason FFv13 got so heavily delayed and then switched to a new engine, as well.) 

But getting into the actual writing portion, I’ll put a disclaimer saying I don’t consider myself to be a better writer than KH’s team. I write for self-indulgence and entertainment purposes, and definitely not for continuity or even logical reasons. 

So while I disagree with the writing team’s decision to backend all of the story into the final quarter of KH3′s playtime, I’m not gonna change that in this situation. For instance, I feel the story would’ve flowed better if Aqua was saved sooner, between Disney worlds. And then Ventus was saved just a little sooner than canon, before the final Disney worlds. And then they all went to war after the completion of the final Disney worlds. 

BUT, I’m not changing that. Consider everything that’s happened up to the end of San Fransokyo to be the same in this scenario. 

So how would I have tackled it? Oh, so you’re approaching me?

Sora finds the Master’s Defender on the beach, where Aqua left it a year ago when she fell back into the Realm of Darkness. Something snaps in him and he recognizes it to be Master Eraqus’ Keyblade, despite never meeting the guy. 

He takes it back to Yen Sid’s tower and asks what that could all mean. Yen Sid informs Sora that it is indeed Eraqus’ Keyblade. Theorizing that if it didn’t disappear along with Eraqus, it may mean that it was in Aqua’s possession after he was struck down. And so it could very well be a means to save her and Ventus. 

Sora isn’t really sure what to do after that, but he has this Keyblade now. And he feels a very strong connection towards it and the possibility of saving Aqua and Ventus. It’s almost like his heart is tugging on his sleeve and telling him to go somewhere. Like there’s a voice, muffled and distant, screaming at him to get up and get moving. Aqua’s in danger without something to defend herself. We have to go save her now. 

He stands up after a moment of silent contemplation, on the steps outside Yen Sid’s tower. Just like the sleeping boy did over a decade ago, he raises the Keyblade and opens a gateway to another world. Donald and Goofy ask Sora what he’s doing and how he even managed that. But Sora doesn’t respond and bolts inside, leaving them to chase after him. 

He finds Castle Oblivion on the other side, but doesn’t recognize it. He laments that this place doesn’t look like it used to, before Donald and Goofy drag him out of his daze and ask what this place is. Sora says he doesn’t really know, but he feels something important dragged him here. That muffled voice in the back of his head starts to get a little more clear. But he still can’t tell who it is.

As he walks in the castle doors, the voice gets louder and he starts to see things that never happened to him. Much like Roxas had experienced when he first stepped into Castle Oblivion, one of the hearts inside Sora is starting to react. He sees memories of Terra and Aqua. Of Vanitas and Xehanort. People he’s seen before but long before he ever met them. At first, Donald and Goofy try to get him out of the castle. But Sora stubbornly refuses to leave and starts plowing towards the doors at the end of the hall. He’s about to shove the doors open when that voice is finally clear enough to hear. And it’s asking him to use the Keyblade. 

The memories start to subside and he realizes that they’re Ventus’ memories. He raises the Master’s Defender to the doors in front of him, unlocking the castle’s hidden door and revealing what Axel had been searching for: the Chamber of Waking.

(Side note, this was another minor disappointment I had, with the Chamber of Repose and Chamber of Waking hardly mattering in the final stretch of KH3 and post-game story. I really wished it have been more relevant rather than just a storage room for a body and some broken armor+Keyblade).

He paces around the throne, staring at Ventus’ sleeping body and the strange design of the room. He comments that Ventus looks exactly like Roxas, maybe Donald and Goofy can ask about that, too. But before he can openly query about it all any longer, the Keyhole on the back of the throne begins to light up. And Sora raises the Master’s Defender to the lock. 

The white walls of Castle Oblivion have vanished and now the Land of Departure stands where it once stood, broken windows and crumbling pillars, dilapidated walls and rusted chains strewn across the environment. But it’s a castle that Sora feels he can recognize. That Ventus must be able to recognize. 

Sora stares at Ventus’ sleeping body and wonders what he could even do to help, not yet realizing that he never lost his Power of Waking. But taking him back to Yen Sid would be better than leaving him in the castle, now exposed for other people to find him. Sora starts to pick up Ventus’ body, pulling him over his shoulder with Donald and Goofy’s help to get him to safety. 

They don’t even get past the stairs of the thrones before someone waltzes in the front door and openly remarks that this is where Ventus had been hiding the whole time. Vanitas takes advantage of the unfavorable predicament and immediately starts attacking. Sora, carrying Ven’s limp body, is completely unable to defend himself and the two are sent sprawling across the throne room. Before Vanitas can go in for another strike, Donald and Goofy jump to Sora’s defense and start yelling at him to get up. 

Sora, as he was in Monstropolis, is crippled by Vanitas’ presence and how Ventus’ heart is reacting to him. He still tries to get up and fight, but is significantly weaker than expected. He rushes past Donald and Goofy, Keyblade dragging across the floor in his hands, and haphazardly swings it out at Vanitas. But Vanitas easily backsteps and strikes Sora again, putting him on defense and leaving him helpless. 

He’s still desperately trying to attack Vanitas, feeling some anguish and anger towards the boy, despite these feelings not originating from Sora himself. But he’s still too weak, too encapsulated by this utter rage, to put forth a real fight and gets knocked back again. He’s struck hard enough to send his body hurtling across the room and crashing back down into the floors, sliding to a stop in front of the thrones. 

Sora can’t get back up. He’s too weak, but he’s desperately trying to grab his Keyblade again. All he can see through blurry eyes is Donald and Goofy trying to fend off Vanitas. He reaches out for them, telling them to run. But the image of Vanitas hurting them, hurting his friends, is too much. Combined with the severe pain from Ventus’ heart, Sora passes out with a loud thump from his heart.

He can hear a voice talking to him, saying that they have to wake up. Sora asks what he can do, to which the voice responds to use the Power of Waking. Sora laments that he never got it back, but the voice, Ventus, reassures him that he never lost it. He remarks that Sora never lost his power, it just needed some time to find its way back to him. Bolstered by this vote of confidence, Sora appears above his own Station of Awakening, finding Ventus’ heart hidden beneath it. And he uses his Keyblade to awaken Ventus’ heart. 

Vanitas has easily beaten Donald and Goofy, and he’s standing over Sora’s exhausted body. Ventus’ heart resting inside, ready for Vanitas to take back. Vanitas, all too eager to reclaim what he knows is his, prepares to stab Sora with the Keyblade. 

But something feels different. He looks down at Sora, realizing he can’t feel that light inside him. There’s traces of it, but Ventus isn’t there anymore. He’s staring at Sora, confused. Ventus was just there, what could’ve-

There’s hardly a second to react before someone is screeching Sora’s name. Vanitas whips his head around to catch sight of Keyblade hurtling towards him, barely managing to guard the hit from Ventus’ weapon, the child holding it staring at him drenched in rage. The powerful burst of energy from both halves of Ventus’ heart clashing sends shock-waves across the throne room. Donald and Goofy, both tossed to the side by Vanitas, marvel at the sight. 

Ventus skids back across the floor, still on his feet, standing in front of Sora’s body. Vanitas is still standing as well, the two staring at each other. It’s a long, uncomfortable moment, neither daring to move lest the other react and punish for it. But then Vanitas breaks away and starts running towards the entrance to the castle. 

Ventus yells at him to get back here, ready to chase after, before he’s pulled away by the sounds of Sora stirring on the ground behind him. The anger melts away completely and Ventus turns back to Sora, watching him slowly sit up. Donald and Goofy rush past Ventus to help their friend and heal him. Ventus stares at Sora, recognizing his face.

Sora looks up at makes eye contact with Ventus. They’re caught staring at each other, each wondering why the other looks the way they do. But Ventus breaks the silence and asks if Sora is okay. Sora says yes. Ventus feels relieved and holds out a hand to pull Sora back up, and the two greet each other for the first time. 

They can hear the doors to the castle opening, remembering who they’re letting get away. The four run after Vanitas out into the broken courtyard, finding the world mauled from the dark storm and a dark corridor that Vanitas must’ve escaped through. Ventus is distraught to find that his home was destroyed, only fueling his anger more towards Vanitas and Xehanort. In further blind anger, he rushes through the dark portal to follow Vanitas. Sora panics and runs after him, but the corridor closes before Donald and Goofy can follow. 

The portal leads them to the Dark Margin, where Vanitas finds himself unprepared to find another Guardian of Light, Riku, fighting a mass of Heartless. Sora and Ventus follow just after, both single-track targeting Vanitas.

Riku is still fending off the Heartless and Aqua’s dark form, but finds himself staring at Ventus, recognizing “Roxas” and wondering how Sora managed to get him back.

Sora manages to get one good swing against Vanitas, cracking the helmet’s glass and threatening to reveal his face. But they’re caught unawares when Vanitas baits the Heartless swarm to attack them, too. 

Vanitas takes the moment of panic to slip away through another dark corridor, leaving Ventus, Sora and Riku to fight off the swarm of Heartless. Ventus is only strong enough to provide support, still weak from his decade of sleep. After enough fighting, Riku and Sora use their Keyblades’ strength that they discovered in the Sleeping Realm to destroy the Demon Tower.

Riku is left exhausted from the fight. Ventus goes to his aid, asking if he’s alright, which leaves Riku confused why “Roxas” of all people would care about his well-being. They’re both caught off guard when Aqua, tainted in darkness, appears and starts charging at them both. Ventus is stunted by the image of Aqua alone, completely unable to react aside from muttering her name. 

Sora dashes between them both, holding back Aqua’s Keyblade from striking. Ventus is paralyzed by the image of his friend having fallen to darkness, and the sound of her voice in such pain and despair. Sora fends her off, putting her on guard and buying Riku some time to go save Mickey. Ventus tries reaching out to Aqua, but she only says Ventus shouldn’t get involved. 

Sora and Ventus start to fight her, Ventus mostly providing minimal support, not wanting to hurt Aqua. He’s calling out to her the whole time, slowly drawing Aqua out and urging her to remember himself and Terra. Mickey and Master Eraqus. She’s slowly letting her guard down more and more, muttering things when Ventus keeps telling her about their past. Reminding her of their training sessions, of the Mark of Mastery, how she protected Ventus from Braig and freed him from Vanitas, kept him safe in the castle for over a decade. And she’s finally knocked out of it. 

The darkness lets go of her and she starts sinking into the waters. Without thinking for his own safety, Ventus dives after her, yelling her name and reaching for her hand. She recognizes Ventus and reaches up to meet him, both falling farther into the darkness. But before they can fall any farther, Sora has followed them down as well, and is pulling them both back up to the surface. 

Aqua wakes up on the shores of Destiny Islands, recognizing Sora and Riku. They’re both thankful that she’s okay, and Sora turns around and calls Ventus over. Aqua follows his gaze and sees Ventus running towards her at break-neck speed, practically tackling Aqua in a hug. He’s crying and smiling, clinging to her body and sputtering out how happy he is to see her safe. Aqua’s hugging him back, but she asks how and why the islands are in the Realm of Darkness. Everyone tells her that she’s in the Realm of Light, and she’s free from the darkness. Aqua starts to tear up as well, hugging Ventus tighter and saying thank you to everyone that saved her. 

YOU CAN PROBABLY TELL THIS IS INSANELY AMBITIOUS and very different from what actually happened in KH3. But god, I wanted Aqua and Ventus’ reunion to be so much more than it was. Over a decade apart from each other, I expected so much more emotion and especially some crying. I get that it kinda got saved for when they saved Terra. And the good morning scene was absolutely adorable with Aqua petting Ven’s head. But I just wanted more, y’know?

[keijitranslates]

[KH side story translation] the beginning of Other Diamonds

“Riku!”

Sora runs up like he always does, kicking up sand as he approaches, which wakes Riku up.

“Noisy as always, aren’t you, Sora?”

“Because you’re being lame and just laying on the ground when we came all the way out here.”

“Unlike you little children, I’m tired.”

Sora and Riku were a year apart. Only a year. Even though they were so close in age, pointing out the difference was always enough to shut up Sora when he was being kind of annoying. Sure enough, Sora pouts and wrinkles his face.

“Did you need something from me?”

“Nah, nothing really.”

Sora grabs his knees and sits next to Riku.

“I mean, Riku, all you do lately is sit and look at the ocean.”

“You say that as if there’s anything else on this island to look at.”

Riku peers at Sora’s face. He must’ve been doing some sword play. Wakka and Selphie can be heard yelling as they play in the distance.

This inlet is a little far off from where everybody plays, and not a lot of people come here. Even the waves crashing against the shore sound a little more calm.

“You know the ocean’s never going to change no matter how long you look at it, right?”

“That’s not true.”

“Hmm, I wonder…”

Sora tilts his head.

“What are you two doing?”

A smile appears on Sora’s face as he turns to look at who the voice came from.

It was Kairi.

“Nothing really,” Riku says, slowly turning back and smiling a bit.

“Ah, you’re doing nothing, are you?”

Kairi sits next to Sora.

“Nothing sure is boring, huh?” Sora says to Kairi, looking for a kindred spirit.

“I think it’s nice to sit and look at the ocean every once in a while.”

Not getting the answer he wanted from Kairi, Sora pouts again.

“Hey, Riku, wanna do the usual?”

Sora turns toward Riku.

“Hmm?”

“A beach race!”

That was a short race Sora and Riku would sometimes run around this inlet. They’d start at the inlet and run to the paopu tree at the top of the cliff. The rules were simple – just touch the paopu tree and run back.

“Again?” Riku asked, exasperated, and shrugged his shoulders.

“What do you mean ‘again’? It’s been forever! I think the last time we did that was, uh…”

“Three days ago,” he stated, even more exasperated.

Just three days ago they had raced, and the result was Sora’s crushing defeat. But Sora would never stop trying until he won, no matter how badly he was beaten.

“If I were to keep losing like Sora does, would I keep on trying until I win?” Riku had thought about that sometimes, but wasn’t sure if he would.

“Yeah, it’s been a whole three days!”

Kairi chuckles as Sora stands up assertively.

“If you insist. Just once, though.”

“Hooray!”

Sora does a little jump as Riku reluctantly stands up.

“I’ll be the referee,” Kairi says, walking to a higher spot from which she can see the start line.

“The usual rules apply. Take any route you want. First one to tag that tree and make it back here wins.”

“Yeah, yeah, got it,” Sora says, nodding at Riku’s explanation.

“If I win, I’m captain!” Sora declares.

In response to Sora’s proclamation, Riku glances at the logs lined up on the sandy beach. Riku, Sora, and Kairi had gathered them together. They were trying to build a raft right now with those logs. In order to go somewhere that isn’t here – to go somewhere else, beyond the sea.

“And if you win…”

Sora tries to continue, but Riku interrupts him with a thought that came to his mind.

“I’ll eat a paopu with Kairi.”

Sora physically stops in his tracks, surprised by Riku’s blunt assertion.

“Huh?”

“Deal? The winner gets to share a paopu with Kairi.”

“Wha, wait a minute…”

Sora gets flustered.

The paopu tree. There was a special legend about its fruit.

“The two who have shared the fruit of that tree shall be tied together for eternity.”

I know who Sora wants to share the paopu fruit with. And, perhaps, who Kairi wants to share it with as well.

“Ready? On your marks!”

Oblivious to their conversation, Kairi’s voice echoes over the beach.

“3, 2, 1…go!”

Kairi kicks off the battle. Riku runs straight across the tree bridge, but it looks like Sora had opted to run along the beach route. Riku knows that the beach route is actually faster if you run it quickly enough. The bridge has gaps and running smoothly across the beach is much faster than jumping the trees.

Sora practically ran for his life on the beach. Riku knew that Sora would get serious in response to that challenge. But he can’t take back the words he’d impulsively let slip out of his mouth.

At that time, he’d suddenly remembered that drawing in the cave.

Sora surely doesn’t even know I know about that drawing.

Riku takes the leap from the tree bridge to the watch tower and looks down at the beach. Sora looks like he is running behind.

Riku takes one big, deep breath and jumps up to ride on the slider. If he keeps up this pace, Sora probably won’t overtake him.

The difference between 14 and 15 is still pretty big, and when he’s fought seriously, Riku has never lost to Sora. Sometimes he did lose, but it was either on purpose or because he was annoyed and not really putting effort into it. Sora hasn’t noticed that, but Riku thinks Kairi might have. He also thinks that, someday, he might lose to Sora.

For instance, right now, with how he was winning the battle for how much of Kairi’s heart he occupied.

Riku sent sand flying up as he landed on the beach from the slider. Sora is still behind him. He jumps to the rocky area, and as he goes to touch the paopu tree, Riku jumps up higher to the palm tree growing at his side, where he waits for Sora’s arrival.

Sora finally jumps up from the ground, and, confirming that he touched the paopu tree, Riku jumps to the wooden bridge.

Kairi is just beyond their line of sight, and Kairi is staring at Sora.

I probably won’t lose to Sora today, either, but I’m sure I will someday. If that’s true, then…

Sora runs in a daze.

That’s definitely why I can’t beat Sora.

“Whoooo!”

Riku had lost, just by a couple of steps.

“I did it!” Sora yells, falling down on the beach. Riku looks down at his face.

“Sure is like you to get all worked up over who’s captain, Sora,” Riku tells him, calm and composed.

Sora then puffs his cheeks, sulking.

“Uh, a-about that thing you said…” Sora asked.

“That thing I said? Oh, about the paopu fruit. It was a joke. You should’ve seen the face you made…it sure was funny,” Riku says, as Kairi runs up to the two.

“Congratulations, Sora!”

Sora answers by raising a fist, as if he didn’t have the energy to face Kairi.

“What were you two talking about?”

“Secret,” Riku answers, jumping to leave the inlet towards the cliff. He kind of wanted to be alone.

“Where are you going?”

“Also secret.”

Kairi tilts her head a little, staring at Riku, who’d answered bluntly.

“And you won’t beat me next time, either!” Sora shouts.

“Yeah, yeah, sure.”

And Riku climbs the cliff.

People don’t tend to come up the cliff. Riku stares fixedly toward the horizon.

There’s no way I can lose to Sora.

He wasn’t sure how long he’d convinced himself of that. Probably since he’d noticed how Kairi felt. Because of that, he’d convinced himself that there’s no way he could lose to Sora at something else – like that race they’d just had.

I’m jealous of him.

I can’t desperately push myself like he did back there, and I can’t smile like him either.

Why am I the only one who’s a year older?

He might not have felt that way if he were the same age as them.

I can kind of feel a pain deep in my chest.

The wind felt nice, but he was still in a bad mood.

If Sora weren’t here – or if Kairi weren’t here – I’d probably get along fine with whoever was here. But right now, I don’t know what I should do. This world is so cruel that I dream of both a world without Sora and a separate world without Kairi.

The wind blows through.

Is this wind coming from the sea?

Or is it coming from the sky?

The sea and the sky in front of me are the same as always – and this world will never change.

Riku closes his eyes. Even with his eyes closed, the image of the blue of the sea and the sky is burned in.

I wanted to be pulled out of this unchanging world.

 “The door will soon open.”

Riku opens his eyes, responding to the voice that came out of nowhere.

“Who are you!?”

However, there’s nobody there. All he could hear was the cries of the seagulls and the sound of the waves.

“The door will soon open.”

He heard it once again.

I have heard this voice before.

Yes – I know whose voice this is.

 “You understand the darkness within you, don’t you?”

“And what of it?” Riku yells, to the voice coming from the darkness within him – to Ansem’s voice.

“Then why won’t you submit to it? Just go ahead and destroy Sora, or Kairi.”

“Like hell I would!”

When he comes to, his surroundings are pitch black.

I can’t see the blue anymore. I can no longer see the sky and sea I remember fondly.

(Because I feel a bit bad just posting something so long without this, you can find the novel at the following link!  It has a lot of other short stories that aren’t quite as interesting but still fun to read if you know Japanese, and of course some Shiro Amano illustrations - though none for this story in particular: https://www.amazon.co.jp/gp/product/4757521529)

[fortunatelylori]

GOT: The exhausting march towards the dramatic TWIST

I think I’m going to shock people with this statement but ... out of all the season 8 episodes we’ve seen so far, episode 4 is by far my favorite. 

Now don’t get too excited by the seemingly warm tone ... what I mean by favorite is that I hated it less than episode 1 through 3, which is about as high a praise as I’m likely going to have for this debacle that is season 8. 

General impressions:

There are two reasons why I felt this episode was better than the last 3: 

1. It was more focused, with 3 clear storylines: D*ny’s war for the crown (story A), Jon’s and his family continuing to be dead inside (story B), Jaime’s return to his sister-lover (story C). This kind of focus and definite structure should be a given. However GOT decided to go all yolo on our asses this season and as we’ve already covered in my other reviews, it’s gotten to the point where I’m genuinely shocked to see an episode that doesn’t jump from plot point to plot point like an enraged orangutan on ecstasy. 

2. It was centered around this woman: 

Look at that face... Holy Shit! She’s going to give me nightmares!

Now, normally an episodes focused on D*ny would be bad news for me because I don’t particularly care for her, as half of my list of metas can conclusively prove. 

However, since she’s the only character whose POV isn’t hidden and her scenes aren’t cut short or drained of any and all possibility of actual human emotion, she’s become the only character that I can watch without feeling frustrated, confused or on the verge of an anxiety attack. I actually like to know what the hell is happening on screen and what the character wants in any given scene. Call it a pet peeve of mine. 

Although even D*ny, as well rounded a character as she is, suffers from the Ds oscillating trend this season. Last episode, D*ny stood her ground against the NK, committed herself and her armies to the defense of the realm and saved Jon’s life. This episode, she’s back in full Mad King’s daughter mode, with a pinch of Viserys on the side. 

But that’s a quibble, honestly and you can always argue that Jorah’s death really pushed D*ny into a dark place in which the crown of Westeros and her war against Cersei becomes more important than her own humanity. 

However, what isn’t a quibble is that death seems to have become a shorthand device the Ds employ to signal D*ny’s eventual rise as Queen of the Ashes. She loses Jorah in episode 3 and by the end of episode 4, she loses both Rhaegal and Missandei as well, leaving her in a seeming cliffhanger over whether or not to put the Red Keep to the torch as revenge. 

The problem is that D*ny had been chopping at the bit to burn down King’s Landing since season 7 when she had to be talked out of doing just that TWICE. This episode Tyrion once again has to put the breaks on D*ny’s fiery fantasies. 

This scene right here is a treasure trove of Mad D*ny clues. But let’s focus on two of them. Firstly, the impetuous to burn KL is stil there: 

D*ny: We will hit her hard. We will rip her out root and stem. 

Tyrion: The objective here is to remove Cersei without destroying King’s Landing. 

That is not a happy face ...

As D*ny put’s it, they need the capital because otherwise Cersei can continue calling herself the queen of the 7 kingdoms. 

That’s D*ny’s priority, folks: the acquiring of that stupid title. 

And if she has to march her weakened army, her sick dragon/child for thousands of miles and burn thousands of innocent people to get that title, she’ll do it. 

Considering this set-up, why exactly did we need Missandei and Rahegal to die? One day into Tyrion’s proposed blockade and D*ny would be roasting giant marshmallows in the Red Keep gardens. 

In my opinion,  the reasons for killing Rhaegal and Missandei are not tied to the dark!dany arc at all. Instead, Rhaegal gets killed because they want to make the D*ny/Cersei conflict as even as possible so they’re eliminating one of D*ny’s weapons of mass destruction. 

And Missandei ... poor Missandei gets killed in order to shock the audience. There is absolutely no reason to kill her in this way ... If she was to die, the time for that would have been in episode 3. They have to actually push the suspension of disbelief in order to convince the audience that somehow Euron got a hold of this girl from an armada of wrecked ships, instantly knew how important she was, dragged her back to the Red Keep and then brought her up on that wall expecting .... what??! 

Euron and Cersei are far too smart to believe D*ny will give up her war for Missandei so why kill her so publicly? To intimidate D*ny? They didn’t need Missandei for that. They could have just as well beheaded all of the hostages they took from the ships. 

They kill Missandei because that’s the easiest way for the Ds to surprise the audience and for them to garner some sort of sympathy for D*ny when she eventually does end up going all Pablo Escobar on a city filled with a million people. 

The other glaring Mad D*ny moment in the scene and one that plays straight into political Jon, is this: 

Sansa: The men we have left are exhausted. Many of them are wounded. They will fight better if they have time to rest and recuperate. 

D*ny: How long do you suggest? 

Sansa: Can’t say for certain. Not without talking to the officers. 

D*ny: I came North to fight alongside you. At great cost to my armies and myself. And now that the time has come to reciprocate, you want to postpone?

Jon: The Northern forces will honor their promises and their allegiance to the queen of the 7 kingdoms. What you command, we will obey. 

I’ve seen a lot of people being angry at Jon for “taking D*ny’s side” in this conflict but in order to understand how this plays into political Jon, there are 2 things you need to keep in mind: 

The first is exactly when Sansa intervenes in the conversation. She steps in directly after both Tyrion and Jon manage to convince D*ny not to burn down King’s Landing. D*ny reluctantly agrees to the blockade because that would mean having to wait to take the crown and as she puts it: 

D*ny: The longer I leave my enemies alone, the stronger they become.  

Now Sansa wants to delay her even further. This is not acceptable to D*ny. 

In addition to that, I don’t think Sansa appreciates just how dangerous and volatile D*ny is. She doesn’t know about the men being fed to dragons, or the 163 crucified masters or how close she was to jumping on a dragon and burning down KL in the past. 

Jon, however, does understand D*ny quite well by this point. I don’t buy his speech as him agreeing with D*ny at all in this scene and considering this is the face he puts on to silence Sansa: 

I’d say this is a guy desperately trying to keep a bomb from exploding directly in the face of someone he cares very deeply about. 

Narratively, I believe this is supported by the Sansa/Tyrion scene later on when Sansa is surprised to realize that Tyrion is actually afraid of D*ny. She simply hadn’t considered that people are scared of what D*ny might do. 

As interesting as D*ny’s descent into madness is (despite Missandei’s useless death), it’s counterbalanced by the shit show that continues to be Jon Snow. 

Watching Jon’s arc this season, and by extension all the Starks, is like banging your head against a concrete wall over and over again, without making a dent. It’s pointless, exhausting and painful. 

At this point I don’t care if he’s in love with D*ny or Sansa, if he’s pol!Jon or idiot!Jon, if he wants to be king or fuck off beyond the wall. I genuinely don’t care anymore. What I do care about is being given access to Jon’s story enough to figure out what the hell he wants and what he’s doing. 

It’s one thing to keep a character’s POV hidden for an episode but we’re going on almost 2 seasons now. And Jon isn’t a secondary character like Littlefinger where you can get away with hiding the POV because he’s not as big a part of the plot as a main character is. 

But Jon is a main character and this effort to keep him enigmatic and mysterious isn’t only wreaking havoc on his arc but it’s also affecting the rest of the Stark family. Case and point: 

In case anyone is keeping score, this is actually the first and only scene all the Starks have together in 4 episodes, amounting to 5 hours of footage. 

And just look where they decide to end this scene! Right when we’re going to see Arya and Sansa react to the parentage reveal and see what they and Jon discuss next. They gave us the mere bones of this scene and left us without the meat. 

The important part of the scene, the emotional underbelly, the opportunity to see these people come together and support and embrace Jon as the Stark they still think he is, is taken away from us. Because that would chip away at the mystery surrounding Jon’s arc this season. 

I’d argue depriving Jon and the Starks of the emotional bond they share is way too steep a price to pay for what is essentially a cheap thirll that becomes cheaper and cheaper by the minute considering they’re delaying whatever reveal they’re planning on making past the point of me giving a shit!

This episode did, however, give me the perfect visual way of describing Jon’s storyline right now. Jon is basically stuck between: 

and 

and he chooses neither. 

He sends Ghost away (without patting him because having KH and the wolf in the same frame would be too costly for the overly expensive GOT) and refuses to ride Rhaegal because ... reasons. 

So instead of seeing him choose between being a direwolf and a dragon, we’re seeing him do nothing, while looking overly enigmatically blank for 5 hours straight. I just .... I’m sooooo tired of this. Can this be over now?

PS: I’d discuss Jaime’s storyline this episode but I don’t want to say: I told you so ... Well ... ok, if you insist:

a little sour milk dribble on Tormund’s beard and a silly giant story isn’t going to make me forget that Jaime has arrived in Winterfell on the coat tails of a 20+ year toxic relationship with a woman who is not only his twin sister but is also currently pregnant with his baby.

Also:

Jaime: She (Cersei) has always been good at using the truth to tell lies. Don’t be too hard on yourself. She’s fooled me more than anybody.

Tyrion: She never fooled you. You always knew exactly what she was. And you loved her anyway.

Yeah …  Imagine entering a relationship with a guy exiting THAT. Dealing with sour milk beard is mild by comparison.

(source)

Favorite scenes

The “If you love me, you’ll erase yourself” scene: 

There is something so deeply disturbing about this scene that I can’t help but be fascinated by it. The J0nereys relationship has always been toxic and this scene right here encapsulates just why: 

In order to be with D*ny, Jon needs to give up everything that makes him who he is. In season 7, he was forced to bend the knee and suffer the ire of the entire North for it. Now D*ny is asking him not only to give up his claim but also lie about who he is and separate himself from his family in order to make sure that D*ny gets to be queen. 

No one, not one person in this world, no matter how beautiful, rich, good in bed or seemingly in love with you, is worth you giving up who you are and removing yourself from your family (provided said family is not toxic, of course). And anyone that would ask you to do that, should be dumped on their asses pronto.

Jon can’t do that, unfortunately. Because he’s brought D*ny here to fight “his war” and pretended to be in love with her. And also because D*ny simply isn’t rational anymore. So he’s stuck apologizing for people liking him (just think about that!) and having to put up with her saying things like: 

D*ny: It doesn’t matter what you want! You didn’t want to be king in the North! What happens when they demand you press your claim and TAKE WHAT IS MINE? 

Except the crown isn’t D*ny’s. It never was. Logistically speaking, the crown belongs to Cersei right now. Legitimately, the crown is Jon’s. It’s D*ny that is actually taking what is his, not the other way around. Imagine making someone apologize for you doing that to them. That’s all kinds of messed up. 

Speaking of which: 

Jon: You are my queen! I don’t know what else I can say!

D*ny: You can say nothing! To anyone! Ever! Never tell them who you really are. Swear your brother and Samwell Tarly to secrecy and tell no one else!

You know what she sounds like? Like Tangled’s Mother Gothel convincing Rapunzel that she’s better off being her prisoner. 

Yikes! She’s genuinely terrifying!

Also: 

D*ny: Sansa will want to see me gone and you on the Iron Throne. 

Jon: She won’t. 

D*ny: She’s not the girl you grew up with. Not after what she’s seen. Not after what they’ve done to her. 

2 things: 

1. I hope every D*ny stan in the universe either denounces D*ny for victim blaming or closes their mouths about feminism, misogyny and pitting women against women for the rest of time. If you support this woman and consider her a positive role model, you are not allowed to discuss these subjects in public ever again. 

2. Can you really blame Jon for taking D*ny’s side against Sansa in the council meeting? He already knows just what D*ny thinks of Sansa and what she’d like to do to her if she is given the opportunity. Hurting Sansa’s feelings is preferable to her losing her life. 

The “This better not be unrequited love, Ds!” scene: 

This face right here ... this face: 

It’s heartbreaking. And what really angers me about this scene is that it could have been all the more meaningful had the parentage reveal been played in full. Actually seeing Sansa reacting, hearing Jon’s fears or his anguish, would make her fighting for his crown when he refuses to do so even more powerful and romantically charged. 

Still, this scene comes in direct contrast to the Jon/D*ny scene. While D*ny wants to force Jon to live a lie for the rest of his life, to humble himself and make himself small so she can have all the power and the love of the people, Sansa not only shoots down the possibility of her being the only one in charge of the North and holding steadfast to the idea that Jon will stay in Winterfell. She goes as far as tell Tyrion Jon is the rightful heir when she realizes that despite his supposed loyalty to D*ny, Tyrion is actually afraid of her. 

She sees an opening to ensure Jon’s freedom and she takes it without hesitation. 

If, at the end of all of this, Jon ends up going beyond the wall instead of staying with a woman who loves and values him this much, then Westeros truly is a cruel and horrible place and I’ll be sorry I invested so many years of my life to it.

Episode MVPs

Euron “Best General in fucking Westeros” Greyjoy: 

Euron gets to be MVP this episode because in one fell swoop he destroyed D*ny’s fleet and brought down one of her dragons. What can I say ... Competency really turns me on. 

Too bad Cersei doesn’t love him. If these two actually cared about each other, they could be the McBeths of Westeros. Nothing could stand in their way!

Lord “What an Icon!” Varys: 

What can one say about this glorious man? He is MVP for the second time in 4 reviews and somehow I think he’s not done yet. 

Varys and Tyrion got down to some realpolitick this episode. But Varys had some truly outstanding lines, like: 

Varys: How many others know? 

Tyrion: Including us? Eight. 

Varys: Well, then it’s not a secret anymore. It’s information. If a handful of people know now, hundreds will know soon. 

It’s so rare to find a man that understands gossip so well!

Varys: I’ve served tyrants all my life. They all talk about destiny. 

As a person born under a communist regime, I concur, Varys. 

And my personal favorite:  

Varys: You know where my loyalty stands. You know I will never betray the realm. 

Tyrion: What is the realm? A vast continent, home to millions of people, most of whom don’t care who sits on the Iron Throne. 

Varys: Millions of people, many of whom will die if the wrong person sits on that throne. We don’t know their names but they’re just as real as you and I. They deserve to live. They deserve food for their children. I will act in their interests, no matter the personal cost. 

If this show doesn’t end with a 7 foot, cockless statue of Varys presiding over the whole of Westeros as the ICON that he is, what was even the point?!?!?

[zdbztumble]

“Kingdom Hearts II” revisited: Final Thoughts

There’s an obvious logic to having the Drive Form named Final appear so late in the game, but I think it’s introduced too late. By the time I got it to trigger, the Door had already appeared, and I’d decided that there really wasn’t much left in the other worlds of the game that I wanted to do. That meant there wasn’t much opportunity to play around with the Final Form, or level it up, outside of base grinding, something I always hate doing in any game. I do like Final Form, but it should have come earlier in the game to give the player the most value.

And speaking of final - that final boss is really...lame. As in, not fun to play and not satisfying on a story level. You can say a lot about every KH game that’s come after this - and I have, and will, at considerable length - but at least each of them presents a final boss who is a primary character of that game, in a recognizable form, with (somewhat) motivated stages of transformation. Here in KH II, we have to fight buildings, blasters, reactor cores, those bomb things from the Gummi levels (which, I admit, I appreciated - bringing those into the main gameplay), the armored figure in a chair twice, and a dragon-like mecha before we finally get a shot at Xemnas as we know him (in fabulous zebra robes), in a battle full of reaction commands and triggers that seem intentionally designed to make Riku look like a badass at Sora’s expense.

None of these stages are all that hard IMO, nor are any of them that engaging. The brief section where you play as Riku is a low point for me, due to his limited moveset and trouble navigating the space. I’m not opposed to alternating which character you play as during a final boss, but the execution of the idea here is terrible. Denying any role in the final battle to Kairi and King Mickey is a bigger problem, and I actually refused to have Riku in my party until required to because of that. I’m convinced the staff behind this game want players to use him, but I say - if you’re going to ignore every possible opportunity you give yourselves to have the Destiny Islands trio together in a party, then I’m not going to play with your Creators’ Pet. (And he is exactly that. I may have softened on Riku over the years, but he - and Axel, and half the Organization - are textbook examples of a creative team letting their fondness for characters supersede what’s actually best for them in a narrative.)

Of course, the battle itself isn’t all there is to the finale, and there’s more right than wrong to the story here. For one thing, Roxas and Namine get a nice denouement, one that makes it quite clear how they feel - and what they choose - about rejoining with their original selves. As someone who was bothered by the Riku/Namine business at the end of KH III, due to memories of this game, I can concede that there isn’t a whole lot to Roxas and Namine’s relationship here. Their scenes at the beginning are emotional, and their scene at the end is sweet, but their interaction is very limited. The mere fact that they are the Nobodies of Sora and Kairi does a lot of the heavy lifting for their relationship, and that bond is strong enough - and, at this point in the series, still written well enough - to sell the idea, but only just. I daresay this is something that Days could and should have addressed, but we’ll get to that another time.

The lead-up to the final boss provides nice moments between Kairi and Riku, Sora and Kairi, Sora and Riku, and one wonderful moment between the three of them. Setting aside the fact that the whole final boss should have been a second moment for the trio, and the game’s pandering to Riku’s prowess during the fight - the scenes between Sora and Riku after defeating Xemnas are quite well-done, and very effectively illustrate how their friendship has healed and reached a new equilibrium. Even better than that, however, is the game’s final scene. From Kairi’s letter reappearing as the key to the light and the enthusiastic greetings from the Disney cast, to the last flashes of Roxas and Namine and the final exchange between Sora and Kairi (which has some of the best voice acting those two VAs have done in the entire series), it’s an absolutely beautiful finale. The bittersweet, open, and uncertain finale of KH I is still the emotional high point of the series in my eyes, and I continue to applaud the game’s staff for daring such an ending; the way KH II ends is much closer to what one probably would have expected of KH I. But the happy ending of KH II is very much an earned one, and it’s an effective cap, not just on this game, but on everything done in the series up to that point. Kairi’s past remains mysterious and Maleficent is still unaccounted for, but the chain of tragedies set off by Ansem’s research is ended, the last traces of Xehanort are defeated, the worlds are at peace, and the three friends whose lives were torn apart are finally healed, whole, and together again, ready for a new adventure.

...Or, at least that’s what should have happened.

Back when I first played Kingdom Hearts II - fresh off of KH I, unaware that CoM even existed - it was, without question, my preferred game of the two. I would’ve even called it my favorite video game of all time (which wouldn’t have meant much - even now, it’s a very short list of video games that I’ve played from beginning to end.) I would’ve said the same after the second time I played through it, even as certain nagging doubts crept into my mind. Several years and the rest of the series later, I can’t give KH II that level of praise. 

Kingdom Hearts is a series where the first truly is the best, at least so far. Like CoM before it, KH II either introduces or continues trends and ideas that would bring later games down, and they all start to grate here. Elements like the secret reports and Summons lose their motivation in-story, and in the former case become a lazy way to toss out exposition that should have been part of the gameplay and cutscenes. For the first time, certain Disney worlds are saddled with stiff and uninspired re-tellings of their movie plots, devoid of room for Sora to make a difference. The pacing is uneven and it’s easy to lose sight of the main story during certain Disney worlds. Dialogue is often clunky, and fan service and pandering to Creators’ Pets hurts significant moments of the story. A lot of potential in the backstory of Roxas and the fate of Namine is left untapped. The trend of offering Kairi the will and ability to be more involved only to ignore the opportunity continues, Riku’s reintroduction to the group has issues, and Sora is caught in an awkward transition between the hero of the first came and the idiotic and ineffectual would-be messiah of later games.

With all of that said, though...I still love this game.

On paper, entries like Dream Drop Distance or KH III might’ve had greater ambition in the amount or kind of story they tried to tell, but in the actual presentation of the story, KH II is far more daring. From the prolonged opening sequence spent with a new character to the slow burn on the revelation of the Organization’s plans, KH II is quite unconventional in its story structure, and it often works to the game’s favor. Leaving so much of the year between KH I and II untold, even with CoM, is mystery done right, in a way that feels open to speculation and possibilities rather than heavy-handed teasing and baiting for spin-offs. This is the only time in the series where Maleficent and Pete make for an equal and compelling third party, and having that third force at play makes for another off-beat structural element that’s ultimately satisfying, even with the not-insignificant lag during the back half of the first Disney pass. The Organization being a collective villain rather than a single figure (even if Xemnas was its instigator) is a nice differentiation from KH I and CoM, and how pathetic the villains ultimately turn out to be gives them a nice degree of pathos - though that pathos isn’t carried too far.

While KH II is a few steps down the dark road, it hasn’t hit the abyss yet, and things that start to look problematic here are still strong overall. Some of the Disney worlds may have stiff movie recaps, but most are loose and accommodating to the larger KH story. Some may be filler, but most of them - on both passes - are at least technically connected to the main plot, and most of them - even the filler - in a meaningful and engaging way. The reports aren’t strongly motivated, but they’re not a complete crutch either. Roxas and Namine, if unfulfilled in their full potential, are still a force throughout the game (well, Roxas more than Namine) instead of being abruptly dropped.

Kairi’s denied obvious chances to get more involved, but she does get to strike out on her own and play a more active role in the story than she did in KH I. Riku’s pandered too a little too much once he reappears, but his role behind the scenes before then makes for a strong continuation of his redemption arc from R/R and is well-woven into the overall plot. Sora’s on the road to Flanderization, but he still has many of his better traits from the first game, including his greater competence at his missions and his believable, human reactions to the events around him. While he doesn’t have the arc of growth he had in KH I, or go through the deconstruction of CoM, he does have definite goals as an individual, and a pronounced sense of world-weariness as his chances of meeting those goals - finding Riku, going home, and seeing Kairi again - get further and further away.

Most of all, Kingdom Hearts II is still manageable in its story. The two sets of villains have relatively simple (but not simplistic) goals, and they’re revealed in a comprehensible fashion. More importantly, the logistics and pseudo-philosophical notions behind the villain plots don’t override the entire game, or pull focus from the protagonists. The heroes all have stories here, and if there’s an overarching theme to this game (not as clearly presented as the themes of KH I, mind you), it’s completion and resolution. If we may break them down:

Organization XIII, having made the foolish choice to discard their hearts, desperately try to escape the consequences of that choice through evil acts, only to fail and meet their ultimate end.

Roxas, who opens the game with mystery and confusion, comes to learn who he is and completes himself and Sora with his choice to surrender to his fate, something he grows to be at peace with.

Namine, having achieved a measure of peace with who and what she is, completes her tasks from the end of CoM and rejoins with her true self, after first saving Kairi and granting (most of) the heroes an escape from The World That Never Was.

Ansem the Wise, whose curiosity opened the door to everything that went wrong later, turns his back on base revenge and works to set the worlds to right, giving his own life in the process.

King Mickey, the hero who kept a deliberate watch on the state of the worlds and sounded the alert on the danger they were in, uncovers the truth about Organization XIII and plays his part to bring them to peace and finally makes it back home.

Donald and Goofy finally find their king.

Kairi, left alone with fading memories for a year, resolves to set out to find her friends, and not only achieves that goal, but facilitates their reconciliation and provides the means for them to finally return home.

Riku, after finding some measure of peace with himself in R/R, gives his all to see Sora restored and works to help him from the shadows, but fears to face his friends after his actions in KH I. When finally forced to, he learns that he hasn’t lost them, and the last of his self-doubt is discarded as he joins forces with Sora to finish off the last trace of Xehanort and make it back home.

And as for Sora, our chief hero: he is fully restored from his trials in CoM. Though eager - even desperate - to resume his search for Riku and return home, he doesn’t hesitate to start protecting the worlds again and finish off the remainder of the threat he first faced. While an authority figure presents that threat to him, Sora chooses to take it up, and carries it out without being directed or puppeted by Yen Sid at every step. The weight of the ordeals and his constant travels wear him down, the events of the year he lost (and Roxas’s role in those events) challenge him, and he does at one point refuse the call of the Keyblade (”Not yet! I have to find Kairi!”) Yet he persists in defending the worlds, even when it benefits the villains, and he fights his way to their castle to rescue and reunite with his friends. Having set out early in KH I to rescue those friends, he achieves this, finishes off the villain who turned his world upside down, and finally makes his way home to the island, the friends, and the girl he loves.

Kingdom Hearts II’s resolutions to all of these things is so final, and so satisfying, that the series since has had to ignore its finale, and a good chunk of its story, just to keep dragging things out. That’s to their detriment, but not KH II’s. While imperfect and uneven, it is a worthy sequel to the first game - the last such entry in the series - a lot of fun to play, and an ambitious and satisfying story.

And it has, to date, Kaoru Wada’s finest orchestration for the series. I absolutely adore his arrangement of Sanctuary from this game, and it makes me wish I’d kept up with the French horn every time I hear it.

[nadziejastar]

What’s the relationship with Disney like? Disney’s attitude to games has changed in recent years to become focused on mobile and social games. Have you noticed their attitude change much?

The relationship with Disney has [remained] the same. Actually the contact person at Disney is still the same person from Kingdom Hearts 1, and Disney has given us lots of requests in terms of the Kingdom Hearts franchise and they did mention some smaller titles for other platforms, but our common, most important goal was to [complete] Kingdom Hearts 3. So it’s the same.

Oh, for sure. I get sad when I see Nomura’s old interviews. The above quote is from June 2013. He was so much more upbeat. KH3 actually had a plot back then, too. Sora would look for the ‘Key to Return Hearts’.  

Disney has changed tremendously since 2006. Obviously Marvel, Star Wars, Pixar, totally different style of animation. How your relationship with Disney and its properties evolved over the past 10 years or so in the context of Kingdom Hearts? Tetsuya Nomura: I can say that it has actually been increasingly difficult to get approvals from Disney. That's mainly because in the past Kingdom Hearts titles, the creator wasn't around anymore or the team that used to create those titles wasn't there anymore. There was just this one person that we would just have to go to and they would approve it and we'd be fine and good to go. But because we've been featuring recent titles, they still have existing teams for existing creators that are still working in Disney and still working on a certain title. That feedback process just has been a little bit more difficult than before. And each team would have a different set of rules and guidelines and they would say different things, or they would look at different things. It's just been a little different that how it used to be because Kingdom Hearts is a bigger title than it was before. I think that whenever we would bring our previous titles, a lot of people at Disney, and this is my assumption, but I do assume that they probably didn't know what Kingdom Hearts was. They'd go, "What's Kingdom Hearts? I have no idea." But now that it's become a bigger title, a lot more people have been involved in than before. In that sense the relationship with Disney has changed quite a bit. Emotional changes I don't really know if there has been any changes emotionally for me. But at least physically I can say those were the changes that we had with Disney.

After Versus XIII got cancelled, he became a lot more negative in his interviews. This is from June 2018. Five years later. Around the same time as Versus XIII, BBSV2 got cancelled. And also his relationship with Disney changed. So in a way, even KH3 was kinda taken from him, like Versus XIII was. Nomura was trying to dodge the subject of his emotional changes toward the KH series, but there obviously were some.

You've grown up as a person and as a designer alongside the players and it's been so long since the last Kingdom Hearts was released. How has your perspective on making the game changed over time? Do you still have that passion for it? Or is it just like you feel more of a responsibility to people to make it and end it?

I'm getting older now, so my body really can't take all that difficulty anymore. When I was younger I was definitely more aggressive and I was the one pulling everyone forward, but now there's a lot more energetic staff around me who are more aggressive, so I feel like I'm more like a sage now. Like I'm in the sidelines just telling people what to do. The Kingdom Hearts series has become a huge title nowadays and back then it was more like I was making it secretively in the corner, but now that a lot more people are involved I do feel that it's not my title anymore, it's everyone's title. And just talking about all this … It actually kind of makes me really sad.

This is another interview from June 2018. He said that with all the people involved, KH3 wasn’t really his title anymore and it made him really sad. At this year’s E3, Kitase said that the FF7 Remake was the first game in a long time that Nomura has been really heavily involved with. So, it sounds like Nomura wasn’t as heavily involved with KH3 as he was with past KH games.

Kingdom Hearts means a lot of things to a lot of people. For some, it represents their childhood or it's a story about friendship. What does Kingdom Hearts mean for you?

It's probably the title that represents who I am. When I was a starting as a developer, like I wasn't an industry veteran yet, when I was creating Final Fantasy titles with Mr. Sakaguchi, the father of Final Fantasy, and at that time, he said that Final Fantasy is a game that has everything in it. I don't think that there are that many people left in Square Enix that have actually worked with him on Final Fantasy. Of course, Final Fantasy is still continuing on--they still are committing to push out titles. But when I started creating Kingdom Hearts, that was when I kind of had this time away from Final Fantasy. And of course, I am working on a Final Fantasy title right now, but it was at a time when I was not working on a Final Fantasy title, and I really wanted to realize what Sakaguchi-san said about Final Fantasy, that it is a game that incorporates everything, to Kingdom Hearts. So I brought that idea to Kingdom Hearts. Currently looking at the newer Final Fantasy titles, to be honest, I don't think it really incorporates that idea of having everything. So I think that Kingdom Hearts, to me, is a game that has everything in it.

Nomura actually said that Versus XIII was more of his preference than KH. He enjoyed working on it because it was a break from the super happy, always positive KH universe. 

Nomura: "Kingdom Hearts is not too realistic, but I do want my players to grasp a sense of reality from it as well. For example, I'm sure you had friends when you were young, a good group of friends, but as you grow older things change and it doesn't always stay the same." 

And I think that’s why Lea is (was?) my favorite KH character. Versus XIII was a “fantasy based on reality”. I got the sense that Nomura used Lea/Axel to inject a lot of himself and his preference for realism into KH, since he was so different from other KH characters. He was an adult with a dark backstory. He and his best friend were human lab rats. His best friend later became a sociopath and is possessed. But he longs for the times when they were innocent and happy. Axel was very complicated. I DID get that sense of realism Nomura wanted to convey in his character. That’s why I loved him so much. There was such genuineness in his dialogue.

But I think what Nomura was doing with him and Saïx was so subtle it went over most people’s heads and they couldn’t appreciate it. It sucks because the subtlety made it even better. He basically lived inside the world of his memories. But he hid all of that from everyone (even the player) by smiling. Because he knew happy-go-lucky kids like Roxas and Xion wouldn’t be able to understand him. He was the most realistic and human character for me. He had a dark backstory, but he was still charming, intelligent, and funny. He had many layers. It was devastating to see him get dumbed-down and turned into a caricature of himself in KH3. Flat comic relief whose dark backstory was totally stripped from him. Just like that...poof. Gone. Now it’s all about Retcon X.

October 2014

“If I had to pick, I am a person more on the dark side like Xehanort and co., I harness the burning anger in my heart into what I create,” “Kingdom Hearts 3 current development explodes very much in this sense.”

When I first saw this quote, I had no idea what Nomura meant by channeling his anger into KH3. After playing KH3, I finally understood. That’s why there was so much breaking the fourth wall. Axel was Nomura’s mouthpiece. He was basically acknowledging that the story was crap, like during the scene where he reunited with Ventus and was commenting about how stupid the whole situation was. That B.S. ending? The result of Nomura’s depression. Things aren’t the same anymore. They’ve changed. The whole game just felt like it was phoned in. Nobody who actually cared about the story would do what they did with Kairi and also Lea and Isa’s backstory. KH3 was just so depressing for me because of that. Reading Nomura’s interviews just made it sadder.

2018 Famitsu interview

Tetsuya Nomura's cats were included. He speaks of how his cats cheered him up when he was depressed and how they inspire his work on Kingdom Hearts 3. -The reason he got these cats: Our family really loved cats and dogs, so we always had them in the house. For this reason, when I got a little depressed I was recommended to get cats.

I was really looking forward to Versus XIII when it was announced. Everything about it just sounded so cool. The story was supposed to be the saddest FF, but it would still have fun and humor in it. It was going to be like a road-trip. Noctis’s family was involved in organized crime, like the Yakuza. I still remember the tagline that was a quote from Hamlet. “For there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.” Nomura said Noctis wasn’t going to be super serious like Squall. He was shy and awkward. Somnus is still an awesome song. The Noctis in the above picture just felt totally different from the Noctis in FFXV. They give off a completely different vibe. 

After I beat KH3, I was so disappointed with it, I started looking for a bunch of info on Versus XIII, since that game’s cancellation obviously influenced KH3 so much. I have seen a lot of stuff from people who claim to have leaked info about Versus XIII. I find this particular leak to be credible since the person correctly leaked the plot of FFXV six months in advance:

The game centered about death, ghosts and hallucination/dreams. Noctis killed the female protagonist before the game started but he didn't remember. Ardyn was Noctis ancestor and he was responsible of the crystals disappearing over time (the only one left was Lucis crystal). Regis died in front of Noctis because his bodyguards betrayed him. The protagonists had to leave the capital because their nation lost the war.

The game didn't focus on summons that much (they still existed) and instead there were actual gods which didn't appear physically. One of the gods was the main antagonist of the first FF game. Each nation was inspired by a different capital of the world. The empire was using ghosts as weapons. Ravus wanted to kill Noctis for having killed her sister. The game ended in another dimension which was supposed to be their version of the after-life.

This sounds a lot like what Nomura would do with a story, and is consistent with the info and trailers about Versus. I think I remember one where people were being turned into ghosts/monsters. The goddess Etro was supposed to be worshiped in Lucis. And I remember one of the things that interested me most about Versus XIII was that Noctis was able to see some light in the sky that others couldn’t, and it was due to having had a near-death experience as a child. That sounded SO cool.

I can believe the whole Stella being a ghost thing, because Tabata said they had to create Luna because Stella just wouldn’t make sense in the new story. The dreams/hallucinations part sounds cool to me, but is probably thought of as being “too weird” for a mainstream game. Also, the fact that the game ended in the after-life stood out for me. KH3 already had something similar with the Realm of Sleep. But they tried to connect it more with the after-life, even though Nomura previously said there was “no concept of death” in KH. This made me think he was still hung up on Versus while making The Final World. 

I definitely think that the original Versus XIII would have been a much more interesting game, since Nomura was SO passionate about it. The script was finished, too. It was jsut scrapped. The voice actor of Noctis, Suzuki Tatsuhisa, mentioned during the release date live stream that he still has the Versus scripts at home that he reads on his days off. And he said he couldn’t figure out how to move from the Versus Noctis to XV Noctis and struggled to find middle ground. 

He said he had a hard time getting into the character towards the end of the game, so he had to re-do his lines from the middle of the story again a few times to get it right. The fact that he still reads the Versus scripts tells me that he was really disappointed when Versus became XV. It sounds like he enjoyed what Nomura/Nojima wrote a LOT more and had a hard time masking his displeasure.

I stand behind what Sakaguchi said about big budget games development: it’s not worth it anymore. But they are also very disorganized. The staff -200 souls- had to work when the story still wasn’t completely defined. In fact, this story kept changing every 3 months and the definitive delivery date for the game was for the end of 2014. ---Roberto Ferrari

Sadly, the big budget style of production seems to be at the root of why Square Enix’s console games have been so soulless. KH is not for everybody, but it was a series that was made with passion. I actually enjoyed the handheld KH games more than KH3 because they felt like Nomura was able to do what he wanted creatively, instead of feeling like it was made to appease a focus group. I would give up the super fancy graphics in a heartbeat to get KH0.5 and the original vision Nomura had for KH3.

[jokahlu]

Learning to Fall

Xion had always avoided falling in love. Not wanting the trouble and complications, she tried her best to stay clear from relationships. At the age of seventeen, however, everything changed. 

Against her will, Xion found herself falling hard and fast over Roxas.

The problem? He had a mayor crush on someone else, making her invisible to his eyes.

Just Xion’s luck to have feelings for someone who wants another.

How easy would it be to pick whom we liked?

Love laughs evilly and scoffs. As if. 

Definitely, love sucks.

Sadly, love isn't a decision. Sometimes I wish we could choose whom we loved. It would be much simpler, but it would make it less magical, I guess.

As I prepare myself for school, I hear my mother calling my name from the stairs, warning me that I will be late if I don't hurry up. I comb my ebony hair and look critically at the mirror. I hope he likes it, I think hopefully as I check my simple sundress and sandals. Running downstairs to grab my breakfast, I kiss my mother goodbye and run out the door as fast as I can.

I have always been a very good runner. Being in the school's soccer team had many benefits, and so the long run isn't very difficult for me. Although, I really do regret wearing a dress. It makes me slower than usual, but it's worth it because today I will see him.  Roxas. The guy I've had a crush on since earlier this year.

I've always been the type of person who never let love in, so I could live my life in a much simpler manner. No way to get hurt. But the longer I lived by that code, the harder I sinked the moment I met him.

I remembered well the first time I noticed Roxas. It had been the soccer finals at our school, in which I had played during the match.  He had been there in the crowd with a bunch of friends, watching the game and cheering on our team. I didn't notice them until one of my best friends, a cheerleading girl, approached me at the end of the game and asked if I wanted to go out and celebrate our second-place victory with some guys. The moment Olette pointed towards them, my eyes locked on him.

He had an easy smile; his hair was a couple of shades darker than honey. In the mist of their group, he laughed and joked with his friends. As if feeling someone looking at him, his eyes met my blue ones and looking so carefree and happy, he sent a small smile my way, which made me smile in return. One of his friends called him, taking his attention from me, and his name rolled on the tip of my tongue, wanting to say it out loud. Roxas. It fits him, I remember thinking. Suddenly aware of how I must've looked, sweaty and dirty, I felt my face burn and focused my attention on Olette.

Get some self-control woman, I could practically hear my mind growl, but my heart was strangely silent. Probably too focused on trying to beat its way out of my chest.

I usually didn't turn down a fun plan and I really, really, wanted to go, but my legs were killing me and my mother had made me a special dinner to celebrate, so I declined.

After sneaking another glance at Roxas, I felt my heart sink as I noticed him looking at another girl. She was lonely, seating on the bleachers with only a drawing pad on her lap. She was breathtaking, long and strait platinum hair fell over her shoulder, and her skin was so fair, she seemed from another world.

The ice-queen, I recognized. She was well known in school for the rumors of her breaking guys hearts mercilessly. She had recently transferred to our school, but I had heard all about her being so egotistical, she drove everyone away, leaving her completely alone.

Girls didn’t approach her because of jealousy, so she was always lonely. She always kept her head down and rarely talked. Because of this, guys were intimidated by her beauty and silent demeanor.  Still, she was so beautiful guys couldn't help but falling for her. And it seemed that Roxas was no exception, I thought with disappointment.

Soon, the celebration at the school gym ended, and I was about to leave, only to discover that it was raining in an apocalypse style. It was one of those rare occasions when it rained so hard you couldn't see two feet ahead of you.

“Hey Xion, we’ll take you home!” Kairi offered, eyeing the rain and taking out her umbrella.

“Yeah, it’s no problem,” Sora insisted, linking his hands behind his neck flashing a grin.

“You guys live in the opposite direction from school than me. Don’t worry about it, I’ll be fine,” I said trying to be reassuring. They looked at each other with worried expressions, so I added, “I have my umbrella here in my bag. You better get going or the rain will get worse.”

Kairi had been crushing on her best-friend-since-childhood for so long, I didn’t feel like ruining their moment to be alone. Especially since it was painfully obvious that he liked her back. They were just too naive to notice.

After a couple of minutes, I finally convinced them to go without me, watching them scoot very closely together under Kairi’s umbrella. I suppressed a smile, knowing that Sora had brought his own umbrella, but said he left it home so they would both share hers. Kairi probably knew too, which made the situation even more sweet.

Rolling my eyes at their clumsy way of showing their affection, I pulled my hoodie over my head and started walking under the furious pour. I resented not bringing an umbrella, wishing I had taken Sora’s had not ruined their little happy bubble if I did. But nothing could be done about that, so I just went with it.

Shivering, I walked fast until I crashed with someone out of the blue. I fell down and before I hit the ground, I felt a pair of strong hands catching my arms.

"Hey! Are you okay?" A worried voice reached my ears, almost drowned by the sky falling down on us.

"Yeah, thank you!" I shouted in return, standing up strait. The water clouded my vision and I used my hand to shield my eyes and saw a masculine figure crouch down and retrieve his umbrella from the floor. My breath caught when I saw his face. It was the same guy from the soccer game.

"Don't you have an umbrella?" He asked me. Normally, I would’ve said some sarcastic comment about me being under the rain without one being answer enough, but my heart was beating so fast in my chest I couldn't think strait.

I shook my head in denial, not trusting my voice to sound normal. Even under the bone chilling raindrops, I felt a foreign heat invade my face. I desperately wanted to blame the embarrassment of not having protection from the weather, but deep inside I knew better.

"You'll catch a cold, come here." Roxas said, coming close and partially covering me with his umbrella. His arm and mine came flush together. From up close I could notice how he was slightly taller than me, and without wanting to, I imagined how I would only need to lean forward and slightly stand on my tiptoes to reach his...

"Thanks!" I managed to say, my nerves going haywire as his arm heated mine where we touched. His hair was dripping and I realized that he got wet because I crashed against him, knocking his umbrella to the sidewalk. The realization making me feel even more shy and guilty by the minute.

He asked me for directions to get to my house and he commented on the fact that his was not far away from mine, so he offered to take me home. No one talked as we walked side by side. As soon as we reached my house I thanked him again. Flashing a full grin at me, he turned back towards our school and left. That’s when I realized that he was probably going to the party when I crashed against him, and he went out of his way to bring me home.

And as soon as he was out of sight, I knew.

As my heart was still creating havoc in my chest, I knew it was already too late.

There was no going back, and I was left only with the feeling of falling off the edge and knowing I couldn't climb back anymore.

...

This is the first chapter of a very short story I have in mind. I'm also torn between writing the whole story down or just leave it as it is. 

I’ve always shipped Roxas with Naminé in KH2 and with Xion in KH 358/2 days. So writing either is sweet and painful at the same time for me.

[flightfoot]

1, 2, 41, 51

1. What was the first fandom you got involved in?: Digimon. I stumbled onto Fanfiction.net when I was around twelve (no idea how I did that, I normally didn’t stray from the sites that my mom had found for me to play around on) and immediately found the digimon part of the site. I’ve been into fanfiction ever since. That being said, I’ve only ever really read and reviewed Digimon fics: I never actually produced content for a fandom until Trials of Apollo.

2.  What is your latest fandom?: Trials of Apollo. It’s the third series in the Greco-Roman section of the Riordanverse, for any of my followers who don’t know (though I don’t know how that would be possible at this point, my blog is mostly a ToA blog now). I actually started reading/listening to the books on tape for PJO since I was around 11 or 12, back around the time that Sea of Monsters came out. Or maybe Titan’s Curse. I definitely was into it no later than Titan’s Curse, since I actually attended a book signing for it. It was really cool, Rick let all us kids walk up and ask him a single question. I asked him what happened to Uranus after he was cut up, because I thought that might have something to do with the plot in the future. I think he just gave me some generic answer about what happened in Greek Mythology, though.

That being said, while I liked it and read the books, I was never part of the fandom for it. I never looked up fanfics for it or read theories on it. I liked the series a lot, but I wasn’t obsessed with it. I followed it up through Mark of Athena. After that, with the long gap in-between books, I fell off the series for a solid 8 years, until I started reading @unknownunseenunheard‘s excellent From the Heart KH X PJO crossover fic. I kinda knew the HOO characters from when I read it before, but I didn’t remember them all that well, plus I found it kinda weird how much emphasis Apollo was getting. Finally I decided to give another crack at the series, so I reread The Lost Hero and Mark Of Athena (I actually skipped Son of Neptune on the reread) and read House of Hades, Blood of Olympus, The Hidden Oracle, The Dark Prophecy, and The Burning Maze all in one go summer of last year. I found the description of The Hidden Oracle to be interesting right from the get-go, and due to how easy it was to get my hands on it, I actually started reading it before I’d fully finished Blood of Olympus! 

I. GOT. HOOKED. I’ve liked PLENTY of series, but I hadn’t had something click for me in that way since Kingdom Hearts. I haven’t had this level obsession with anything besides Digimon and Kingdom Hearts. With how long it’d been since I’d had an obsession like that, I was kinda afraid that I’d never be able to get into something to the same extent ever again! I mean, I got into Digimon when I was 11 and KH when I was 13 (though I didn’t get to play any KH game until 358/2 Days released when I was 14. I got into it through the manga initially). I thought that maybe that was it, I was only able to get into those things so much because of the age I was when I was introduced to them. And then Trials of Apollo happened and showed that I still had it, that I could still have this new thing (or kinda old thing, since I’d read PJO before) become an obsession for me, with a story and characters that I’ll carry with me forever. It was actually really important for me, to know that I hadn’t lost the ability to connect with a series that deeply. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve liked a lot of other series quite a bit, but they never became part of my soul the way these three series have, even if I thought they were technically better. Like how I think that Avatar: the Last Airbender is the best cartoon I’ve ever seen, but Digimon Adventure 02 is still my favorite. 

41. List and link to 5 fanfics you are currently reading:

Bookmark, sequel to Book Cult. It’s a Reading the Books fic covering HoO instead of the more typical PJO, with Leo being sent back to read with the demigods and the gods directly after the end of The Last Olympian. I literally make high-pitched squealing noises whenever I see an update!

From the Heart II, Sequel to From the Heart I. The PJO X KH fic I was referring to.

Ashes of the Past, though I still need to catch up on the latest update. Basically Ash gets sent back in time to stop the end of the world, with the ability to restore the memories of certain pokemon and people of his timeline. Surprisingly, it’s not angsty and Ash actually behaves like himself.

Another Brother, which recently started updating again. Basically Zuko somehow ends up nearly dying and losing his memory when he’s about ten years old, and is taken in by Chief Hakoda, who raises him alongside Katara and Sokka. It appears to be a For Want of A Nail fic, and I have some guesses on the exact nail. If you want to know my guess, hit me up, but beware: I might refer to spoilers for the fic in my explanation.

Class 78th Watches the Future is a “watching the video game” type fic for Danganronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc. If you can’t guess, I like that genre. Pre-Tragedy Class 78 watches the video game unfold and react.

Of course, there are other fics I’m currently following, but those are five big ones that tend to make me excited whenever I see an update for them, ESPECIALLY Bookmark. Like I said, I make squealing noises whenever I see an update for it.

51.  Rant or Gush about one thing you love or hate in the world of fanfiction! Go!: Honestly I don’t have that much left in me after typing all that but I do want to say this: I love how fanfiction can shape a person’s appreciation for the plot or characters in a work. I didn’t think much of Daisuke Motomiya from Digimon Adventure 02 until I saw how he was written in dozens of different fanfics and gained a new appreciate for him, for instance. Fanfics can be a way to really make a character shine, in a way that they weren’t able to in their original material, even if implications for their potential was there.

[krinseldraegun]

All the video game asks

Played obsessively? Kingdom hearts!Influenced me creatively? Final Fantasy Tactics AdvanceWho did I play with as a kid? Nobody really. I played single player games for a long timeWho do I play with now? I'm back on a single player binge, but my best friends occasionallyCheat codes? Yeah, pretty often when just burning through emulated games for fun. Outside of that not too often.Ever buy strategy guides? Only for Final Fantasy and pretty much just to collectMultiple copies? DDR Supernova and KH1Rarest/most expensive? I have no idea. I don't have many expensive gamesMost regrettable purchase? A couple games in my steam library were pretty fucking bad and I got them for cheap like half a decade agoMidnight release? I went to the LoZ Breath of the Wild midnight release despite not preordering it bc I had a friend who didEver made new friends from a game? I met my best friend because of maplestory!Picked on for liking games? NahA game you've never played that everyone else has? Most Legend of Zelda games, most spyro games, most crash bandicoot gamesFavorite game music? The OSTs for most Square games are absolute bangersIf you had to, game related tattoo? If I'm doing a game related tattoo I'd rather go all out than get some small tattoo. Like a sleeve of Yojimbo's FFX designFavorite game to play with friends IRL? Mario Kart!Lost a friend over a game? Kinda, I knew a person who was convinced that if the game wasn't structured like Mass Effect or a Telltale game it wasn't an RPG which is objectively wrong.Date someone that hates gaming? It's a big part of my life and always has been. That'd be like asking someone who's been on a football team his whole life up to graduation and maybe college if he'd date someone who hates sports. I don't think I could. Someone who doesn't play games but doesn't hate them? Maybe. I don't really have to worry about this question though 🖤Favorite handheld console? 3DS hands down. It's just fucking goodGame that I know like the back of my hand? KH1. I can beat it without dying with starting equipment in under 9 hoursGame you didn't understand but now love? FFX had quite a confusing leveling system for me when I was a first grader. Good shit now thoughGame related clothing/accessories? I have a couple different KH necklaces, a couple KH shirts, a moogle pin, a palico pin, and the KH 2.8 limited edition pinGame you've logged the most hours in? Recently it would be FFXIV, but Modern Warfare 2 is definitely the mostFirst pokémon game? XD Gale of DarknessArcade game player? I'm really good at time crisis 2 and for a while I was really good at House of the Dead 3Gaming rivalries? Nah, neverGame that makes you rage? Dark Souls and For Honor, but I still 100% Dark Souls 2 SotFSEver play in a tourney? A small local one with friends for Sm4sh. I'm not good at sm4shGaming setup? My computer desk has my gaming pc, wii, ps2, and ps4 hooked up to my TV in my room next to my mini fridge and my ps3 is out in the front roomHow many consoles? 5. PS2, PS3, PS4, Wii, Xbox 360 that's collecting dust in my closet3DS/virtual boy headaches? Everyone gets Virtual Boy headaches, that's what it does. My 3DS doesn't give me headaches thoughGame based off favorite media? YESS I played a LOT of Megaman Battle NetworkBootleg/plug & play? I had an atari plug & play for a bit iirc. We got it for free and it didn't survive longGaming parents? Both used to play, now my mom doesn't and my stepdad only plays panzer general and candy crush despite having a ps4 proEver work in a game store or have a favorite game shop? Never worked in one but my favorite is a local store ran by a really chill dude named David who also hosts smash bros tournamentsSweat blood or tears because of a video game? Sweat often. I get really into games and start stressing a lot. Never blood. Tears is an almost because of the lightning field minigame in FFXE.T.? Never played it, but a game that ended up being shoved in a landfill to that degree must be terribleGuilty pleasure game? None that I can think ofDream sequel? YA BOI WANTS A NEW .HACK// GAMEVR and motion control? I absolutely love VR. I'm waiting to get my own VR setup, but I'm kinda waiting for the cost to go down and better games to come out, but games like superhot and RE7 really show promise for the idea. I've always been a fan of the .hack// series so I've been waiting for VRGenre not for me? RTS and fighting games. I'm terrible at both and I kept getting people telling me I'd be good at starcraft because I'm 1/4 korean and it just isn't happening and it's made me hate the game.Game that started it all? It actually was my first game, and it was Kingdom HeartsGaming when you shouldn't? Too often. Way too oftenMost played arcade cabinet? Either Time Crisis or House of the DeadMario Kart? I'm pretty damn good if I say so myselfRelaxing games, animal crossing, harvest moon? Not really. A lot of them require you to come back day after day for progress without a clear endgame and I can't do that. The idea of needing to consistently log into a game just for maintenance doesn't work for me and is why I burn myself out on mobile games fast.Competitive games? Absolutely! Team based shooters I love competitive modes and ranked modes forCustomization time? It varies, but in games with a lot of customizing it can take around an hour or two if I'm trying to get something specificPreferred class? Tanks! I like being on the frontline being the wall between my team and the enemy!Dream game to make? Real time open world action RPG that's a mix between high fantasy and magitek that has a story mode and an open, create your character and group with friends mode that has its own list of quests and missions separate from the main line but has events that overlapForgotten to eat or sleep? Yeah. Not on the eat part but definitely the sleepGame I begged for as a kid? Kingdom Hearts 2, Kingdom Hearts 358/2 days, KH Re:Coded, KH 3DDLC? Expansions that add a decent amount of new content to a game are wonderful. Locking non-episodic main story content, fighting game characters, and non-cosmetic items behind paywalls is wrong and games shouldn't be pay to win.Steam sales? I have no money to give in with and I'm picky with games I enjoy.Sims voodoo doll? Never played a lot of the sims and if I did it'd likely be more just dumping OC's in a houseRoller coaster tycoon murder? Never played it100% games? First game I got the 100% trophy in is Dark Souls 2 SotFS, and that's after miracles were nerfed into the ground3 games for the rest of your life? Pls don't make me do this. I can't choosePhone games? FFD opera omnia, mobius FF, KHUx, but rarelyKonami code? Ye boiTrade in or keep forever? I keep specific games and trade in the restBuy a console for 1 game? Almost? I bought a 3DS for monster hunter and kingdom heartsGaming convention or tournament? No... I wish...Gaming specific tv or monitor? I don't have any mahney. If I did have the money I definitely wouldGameshark etc? I had a ps2 gameshark. It never corrupted anythingOld nokia with snake? Nope, but I had friends that didHappy childhood gaming memory? Pretty sure I cried the first time I beat Kingdom HeartsArcade tickets for prize? Nah, the games that didn't give tickets were more funBest game ever? Can't think of any. My favorite game is KH, but it isn't the best game. No game is perfectFirst game beaten? Kingdom hearts!

[dialovertoenglish]

Laito - Maniac 02

Yui: Haah……

Yui: (First of all, why am I sitting alone in the limousine with this person, facing him?)

Laito: Nfu, what is it, Bitch-chan? Is there something on my face?

Yui: No, nothing……

Yui: (To begin with, that the brothers gather in this limousine to go to school…… It’s weird if you think about it, isn’t it?)

Yui: (Even though they don’t seem to get along too well. I wonder if it’s a precaution against sunlight.)

Yui: (Haah, if I had been alone, I could’ve run away…… Ah, probably not. They’d catch me if I tried.)

Yui: (Also, Laito-kun has just……)

Laito: -- Hey, Bitch-chan. They say your eyes say more than your mouth…… Don’t you agree?

Yui: Wh……What’s wrong, all of a sudden?

Laito: Nothing. Even though I said I’ve been watching you this whole time.

Laito: Maybe you’re thinking about playing with me? You’re ignoring me without even noticing.

Yui: (kh…… I tried to avoid eye contact as much as possible, but he still caught me.)

Yui: Th-That’s…… W-Well…… Because I’m worried you’ll do something strange again……

Laito: Something strange? Nfu. Like when I licked you there, or did that to you?

Yui: Kh……! Please don’t say it like that.

Laito: But it’s true. Besides, if you’re embarrassed by that, what comes next will be unbearable, you know?

Yui: Wha……!

Yui: (Just what is he planning to do?)

Laito: Oh well. Since it’s awfully humid today, I wanted to drink this here together with you, Bitch-chan.

Yui: ……? What’s this……?

Laito: Hmm. Ayato-kun said he took it from Reiji’s room. It’s a treasured drink.

Yui: From Reiji-san’s……?

Laito: Him. He tried a bit alone and enjoyed himself

Laito: He’s just as gloomy-natured as Subaru, isn’t he? …… *gulp*……!

Yui: (He drank it……!)

Yui: Are you okay……?

Laito: If you think so, how about you drink some, too?

Yui: No, thank you.

Yui: (It looks suspicious. It’s definitely better not to drink that.)

*Laito grabs her*

Yui: Eh……!? Kya…… Mhhh!?

Laito: Ohh, mhhh…… *kiss*……

Yui: (H-He made me drink it…… Mouth to motuh!?)

Laito: Nfu…… Haah…… Isn’t it…… Really good? *licks his lips*

Yui: *cough*…… *cough**cough*…… Without warning…… How mean!

Laito: Nfu. But Bitch-chan, you said you wanted to drink it too.

Yui: kh……!

Yui: (What is this…… My throat feels so hot as if it’s burning…… My chest hurts……)

Laito: -- Hey, Bitch-chan. How does it feel?

Yui: (How does it feel…… I don’t know what to say)

~~~~~~~~~~ Choices: 1. It feels good 2. It hurts

[If “It feels good”]

Yui: It might…… Feel good?

Laito: Nfu. I thought so. I figured if you drink this medicine, you’d surely become obedient.

Yui: (kh…… What am I saying?)

[If “It hurts”]

Yui: It feels…… painful?

Laito: Hmm, that’s a lie. Be more honest about how you feel. Look……

Yui: (Even if you say that……)

~~~~~~~~~~

Yui: (Uhh, it’s no use…… I’m starting to feel dizzy…… I should lie down a bit……)

*he pushes her down*

Laito: Nfu. Bitch-chan, your face is really red, you know?

Yui: Haah…… That’s…… It’s somehow… Incredibly hot……

Laito: Poor you. You’re sweating, too…… I’ll…… Lick it for you…… *lick* …… Mhh *kiss* ……

Yui: (kh…… Even though it usually just feels bad…… Right now, it feels like being tickled by a feather)

Yui: Uh…… hh……

Laito: Huhu, you look like you’re enjoying it, Bitch-chan…… I’ll lick you some more.

Yui: Ah…… Cold……

Laito: Because I’m undressing you. Nfu. Ahh, on your chest…… There’s sweat looking like pearls…… *lick*……

Yui: Stop! I’m embarrassed……

Laito: But it feels good, doesn’t it? Mhh, let’s undress more.

Yui: N……o……

Laito:  It’s not embarrassing. Come on, take off more clothes, show me you immodest side.

Yui: (It’s embarrassing…… But even so, somehow…… I can resist even less than usual)

Laito: You’re surprised by yourself, aren’t you?

Yui: kh……?

Laito: But this is your true nature, Bitch-chan……

Yui: That’s…… not true!

Laito: It is. The you that’s happy to have her body licked by me,

Laito: And the you that’s worried about her body trembling for my every word.

Laito: They’re all you.

Yui: Don’t try to seduce me……!

Laito: I’m not. This is an unshakeable truth. Nfu.

Yui: (It can’t be…… If I accept it in the end…… I’ll end up falling)

Yui: (It can’t be…… And yet……)

Laito: Come, let’s make it feel even better. …… Let’s fall into hell together.

Laito: It’s okay…… I’ll only do what you like.

Yui: kh……

*heartbeat*

Yui: (No……kh!!)

*The limousine stops* *Laito backs off*

Yui: kh……!?

Laito: Ts…… What bad timing.

Yui: Ah…… I-I…… What……

*she sorts her clothes*

Yui: Was that because of that drink?

Laito: Nfu. It was because of the drink, but the side that came out was without a doubt your own, so don’t worry, okay?

Yui: D-Don’t worry……?!

Laito: Oh well. I didn’t do it here on purpose. I’ll love you more slowly when we can take our time.

Yui: (……That those were my true feelings…… That…… That can’t be. It must have been because of that drink……)

Yui: (-- That’s how it has to be)

As two litte notes: When Yui tells Laito “Don’t say it like this”, it’s because Laito’s phrasing was very close to “Anna koto ya sonna koto”. Literally, it just means “this and that”, but it’s mostly used as an euphemism for sex, which is why she felt so uncomfortable.

Later on, about Yui “falling”. The word can mean both literally falling, as well as falling for someone’s trick or falling in love. Since Laito follows immediately with “Let’s fall into hell”, I interpreted it more as falling in the religious sense.

Now that we have this: Sorry for taking so long! I already told you I’d been back home for three weeks, then my best friend moved in with me so we had to settle some stuff, get her furniture, etc. Additionally, I had to take care of some mistakes regarding my Bafög (pretty much German student loans?) because I need that money. I do like being able to eat.

And right now, I’m a bit tired because my degus chewed throught their cage and I got to spend two hours catching two of them when I wanted to go to sleep. Well, at least my life isn’t boring? xD

[ffxvhoe]

Heyo! I was wondering if you would be up to giving tips for aspiring writers. I want to write for FFXV, (And other fandoms), I have a big idea, but I've never written a story before. Sure there have been things on wattpad before but not many people use wattpad anymore imo. So any tips for a novice writer? Sorry if this just sounds like rambling. -🐔

Ahhh wattpad lmao I actually just posted something on there for the ff/kh secret santa that they hold every year ((I was actually a part of the very first one they did I think about 5-ish years ago??)).  But anywho, onto answering the question at hand!!

So we’re gonna start off with the harsher things first.

Know and come to terms with the fact that you will always be your worst critic and your biggest fan.  I know that may sound contradictory but one thing that I’ve come to realize through my years of writing for different fandoms is that you will always be more in love with your ideas than anyone else will, but by that same token you will always find more faults with your writing.  You’ll know exactly what you want to happen in your story and you’ll be able to map it out in your head so when you can’t get the words just right or the atmosphere exactly as you’d like you’ll become frustrated.  When that happens what you’ll ultimately need to do is step away from what you’re writing and come back to it.  I know that for me personally, if I try to write through my frustration it’ll just continue to build and build until I either hit writer’s block or start to hate my story.  When that happens take a step back.

Know and come to terms with the fact that you will not get the comments, reblogs, and validation you’re looking for right off the bat.  Hell, you may not even get it several months in to your blog.  It will feel discouraging and you’ll probably play with the idea of not writing anymore on more than one occasion.  I still go through phases of this myself.  Sure there are ways that you can “get popular fast” which blustersquall talks about here rather eloquently.  Whether you use those methods is up to you ((I’ll admit to using some of them myself when I first started)) but while they do work, in the long run it’s kinda like selling yourself short tbh.

Those are my two main -- more negative -- points of advice for new fandom writers.  Now onto more positive ones!!

It’s a really good idea to surround yourself with other writers!!  They’ll usually be the best people to go to when looking for concrit because, well, it’s their craft too.  They’ll also be the best people to kinda help you when you’re feeling down about your writing since they undoubtedly go through the same struggles.  It’s also a good networking opportunity sometimes too.  That may seem shallow, but if you’re good friends with other writers you can always be sure that you’ll get some reblogs that’ll help get your work out there.  Tit for tat though, be kind to your fellow writers and reblog their stuff too!!  I know that it may seem selfish ((and there definitely are people that only act friendly to other writers for the publicity of it)) but so long as you 1) don’t expect them to always reblog your work 2) be an actual friend and 3) return the favor, it’s not using them. I’m sure some people will disagree with me on that but I stand by what I say.  There’s definitely a fine line, but you can certainly walk it if your heart is in the right place.  It can be scary putting yourself out there, yes, but honestly some of my closest friends on here I met because they’re also writers and I love their work!!

If you plan on taking requests that’s fine, but make sure you still write some content for yourself.  If you have an idea for a story that you really want to write whether it be long term or short term then do that.  If you treat writing as an actual job ((esp when you aren’t getting any actual revenue from it)) you’ll burn out quicker than a match dipped in kerosene.  I admit I’m still struggling with this a bit, but it really is nice to write something that you’ve been dying to write for a long time.  And who knows?  Maybe someone else will have been looking for that content and you’ll finally be able to give it to them!!    

On a similar note remember that you dictate what you will and will not write.  Some people don’t like to write smut and that’s a-okay.  Some people prefer to only write smut and that’s a-okay.  Some people would rather not write reader inserts and some people would rather only write reader inserts.  Some people would prefer not to write things that are too personalized and some people are open to writing more personalized requests.  All of these things are FINE and it is up to you to decide what you want to write, not anyone else.  A “Rules” page is your friend.  If someone sends a request that doesn’t follow what’s on the “rules” page kindly redirect them and ask them to read the rules before requesting.  It’s just common courtesy.  On that same note though do make sure that your rules are clear so there’s no confusion!!

Anyway, these are the main things that come to mind as far as tips/advice goes for new writers!!  I hope that this helped my dearest Chicken Anon and I wish you the best of luck in your writing endeavors ^_^

[deebormzone]

Klingdom Harps 3: Who’s the (Secret) Boss?

Sorry I haven’t written much lately. I recently got the standard English major’s retail job, which sucks away most of my energy. I gotta toughen up so I can produce more insightful content, like this:

I like Kingdom Hearts a lot because it lets me jump and fight and also my friend Jafar is there.

The big KH news, which is a couple months old by now, is that Kingdom Hearts 3 finally has a vaguely estimated release window: 2018. Now I can worry less about whether it will really come out, and more about how much of it will be DLC.

Besides DLC, series creator Nomura has also spoken about the now-traditional secret boss battle. In other Kingdom Hearts titles, there are one or more optional fights, designed to be the most difficult encounters in the game. They’re usually Sephiroth.

In terms of the secret boss, we can’t say anything at this time, but in terms of Sephiroth specifically, my development team are worried that we’ve had him come back so many times so they’re maybe worried it might be redundant at this point. We’re still deliberating on it.

I'm with the development team here. There’s room for more than just Sephy. But assuming they do put a secret boss in KH3 (and since the other big KH games have had secret bosses, excluding one from the biggest Hearts yet would be pretty shameful), who could compete with everyone’s favorite silver-haired genetic abomination?

There are actually a few good options. Here are some dudes I’d like to face in Kingdom Hearts 3 as an uberboss, loosely arranged from least cool to most cool. The only real requirement is that they be either Square Enix or Disney characters.

Crystal Enthusiast: Culex

Culex is a secret boss already! He’s from Super Mario RPG, but designed to look and act like a Final Fantasy boss. It’s implied that he crossed over from the Final Fantasy series to look for strong opponents. I don’t know why he would go looking in the Mushroom Kingdom, but I guess it worked out for him.

With his dimension-hopping and challenge-seeking, Culex would be a good fit for Kingdom Hearts secret boss. This is basically a pipe dream, though. Since he’s actually from a Mario game, it’s pretty unlikely he’d be allowed in. It may be his fate to languish in Mario Land for all eternity...

Principal Samurai: Master Eraqus

Eraqus was a major character in the Kingdom Hearts prequel, Birth by Sleep. He used to teach the protagonists how to use their Keyblades properly. Most of his lessons seem to involve hitting things, but that does tend to build experience in every game in the whole series. Go with what works, I guess.

Of course, he had an unfortunate accident, but that doesn’t prevent him from being a boss. Just call him “Lingering Spirit” or whatever. He’s probably the most likely person on this list to actually appear as a superboss, if he doesn’t show up in Kingdom Hearts 3 in some other form.

But despite being fairly important, his fighting style is sort of basic. He’s got a couple of big moves, but not much else. And even though I usually struggle against him in Birth by Sleep, he’s not that tough canonically. There may be better options.

Evillest Clown: Kefka

Ah, Kefka. He’s the boss of Final Fantasy 6, the clown who usually takes second place on the Final Fantasy villain lists... and sometimes first. This makes him a natural choice for Square Enix superboss if Sephiroth isn’t around.

I’m always down to clown. Kefka’s a manic, psychotic sociopath, which is often more fun to play with than your usual uptight or brooding villain. His fighting style in Dissidia, the Final Fantasy fighting game, is to annoy his enemy to death. Notable achievements of his include blowing up the world and becoming God, making him significantly more successful than your average antagonist. No worries about an underpowered foe here, though I’d rather fight his clown form than his purple angel form.

Somehow, though, I don’t see him getting in. Final Fantasy 6 has had almost no representation in Kingdom Hearts thus far. Is that game even still popular?

That, and the wacky clown personality doesn’t go over well with everyone. It might not fit the “epic boss battle” they’re planning. Shame.

Fallen Mascot: Oswald

I always love the Disney-based antagonists, but it’s hard to pick a definitive one. Maleficent usually takes the lead in villain meetups, but she’s not secret enough to be a secret boss. Is there anyone good left from the House of Mouse, besides maybe Walt himself?

There are plenty of great Disney villains who haven’t shown up yet. Dr. Facilier would fit right in with his control of dark magic. Yzma’s alchemy and sorcery could make for an excellent boss battle. Madam Mim’s shapeshifting could be an intense multi-stage fight. Turbo would jump at the chance to dominate another video game. Hell, they should put Cruella de Vil in the game just because.

The trouble with all of these is that they’re all single-world threats. They don’t hit hard enough to match up to, you know, Sephiroth.

There’s another option, though. Oswald the Lucky Rabbit was Walt Disney’s first animated character, but he took a backseat to now-international-icon Mickey Mouse. Sometimes, though, he reemerges - most recently as a dark version of Mickey in the Epic Mickey series.

In Kingdom Hearts, Mickey is (hilariously) a messiah-like hero of light, so Oswald could conceivably be a reverse version. A cartoony Keyblade wielder with dark versions of Mickey’s god-powers. He’s got the prestige and the lore. Why not take him on?

Of course, the same issue that applies to Kefka affects Oswald: he’s innately goofy, which might damage the brooding, trenchcoat image of a secret ultimate boss. Of course, what with Gruff Mickey as he appears in Kingdom Hearts, maybe they’d make Oswald edgy enough to fit. Somehow.

Numberwang: Sho Minamimoto

Here’s one of Nomura’s creations who could use some more time in the spotlight. Minamimoto is a villain in The World Ends With You, a Reaper who hounds the characters. He’s known for making big piles of garbage and shouting mathematical functions at people (“Sine, cosine, tangent!”). Basically, a flawless character.

The protagonists from his game appeared in the most recent Kingdom Hearts as major players, so there’s some small precedent. Also, he turns into a demigod or something by the end of the game, so he’s probably strong enough.

There are a couple of other characters from The World Ends With You who could work here. First is Joshua, but he’s been in Kingdom Hearts already. Next is the actual TWEWY antagonist, but he’s kind of forgettable. There’s also a secret boss in TWEWY who could show up, but he’s only intimidating because you spent the whole game talking to him and assuming his unimportance.

No, the reason I went straight for Sho is because he’s a certified memer. Don’t underestimate that meme magic. I don’t remember much about the main bosses of TWEWY, but I absolutely remember Shouting Math Guy, and being memorable is what counts in a super-secret ultimate boss fight.

Sadly, this is just grasping at straws. In the end, Minamimoto is a little guy from a little game - on a Nintendo console, even. But you know what they say: a dream is a wish your heart makes.

Burn Victim: Darth Vader

Yeah, I went there. Star Wars is Disney now, and all bets are off. Up is down, black is white, the Jedi are evil.

I’ve seen a lot of comments online about how terrible it would be if Star Wars or Marvel got into Kingdom Hearts, but I just can’t understand them. The whole point of this franchise, besides making big buckets of money, is to rampage across a huge range of wacky environments. Adding Star Wars would be super wacky AND good for more money buckets, so they should do it the moment they get the chance. It’s as simple as that.

Let me address Marvel Comics for a moment. There are a number of villains from that universe who could appear in Kingdom Hearts as superbosses, but they don’t appeal to me very much. A comics expert probably has better opinions than I do, but the bad dudes powerful enough to show up seem kind of dull to me, and the interesting ones are too weak.

Planet-eating Galactus would be a good fit for Kingdom Hearts, but what does the big guy even do? Generic lasers and large hand slap? Doctor Doom is a classic, but when he fights mano a mano it ends up being tiny guns and foot dive. M.O.D.O.K.? A true role model and friend to all, but too weak. Magneto is the best cross between power and panache I can think of from Marvel, but beating up a Holocaust survivor probably crosses a few too many lines, even for Kingdom Hearts.

Despite my complaints, I’d be okay with just about anything from Marvel or Star Wars in the Kingdom of Heart. The wackier, the better, I always say. Still, my dreams of wackiness will likely go unfulfilled. The odds of getting any of that stuff in is pretty low at the moment. But what if there’s just enough influence to take just one piece of Star Wars into Kingdom Hearts? One character, for one fight, harder than any other?

Right off the bat, Vader commands more respect than Sephiroth. A lot more. Here’s a character everyone knows, one of the most infamous villains of all time. He fits the role of ultimate boss extremely well. He’s proficient in one-on-one combat, he’s filled with mystic powers, his saber fighting could lead to great Keyblade clashes, and he generally fits the light vs. darkness themes of Kingdom Hearts.

Beyond the Lucasfilm fees, though, there’s one other issue. His live-action-movie fighting style might not translate well to Kingdom Hearts’ hopping-around-and-exploding-into-beams-of-light fighting style. The game might actually be too goofy for Lord Vader. Maybe not, seeing as how Keyblade Dude Sora has faced off against live-action people before (Pirates of the Carribean and Tron), but the incongruity might be too much for the lawyers, if not the players.

There’s just one name left on my wishlist.

No, Darth Vader isn’t final enough to take the top spot. He’s a lousy dad.

My most wanted superboss candidate can only be THE #1 dad of all time.

The Best: Jecht

Jecht is like if sports became a human being. All he does is play ball, go on adventures, and insult his son. He’s perfect.

He stands alongside Sephiroth and Kefka as the more-or-less final boss of Final Fantasy X. There’s already a lot of X representation in Kingdom Hearts - Tidas is in, Wakka is in, Auron is in, YuRiPa is in. Adding the big man himself wouldn’t be much of a stretch. Plus, Jecht’s natural habitat is the stadium, which is where secret optional bosses are often fought.

This is the guy I want to fight as the secret boss. He’s a being of near-godlike power, and is also a dumb asshole who throws a ball at your head while calling you a wimp. He’s got the strength, and the pedigree as the boss of one of the most beloved Final Fantasies. No licencing issues, no nothing. His favorite prey is lame kids, and that’s basically main character Sora in a nutshell.

Best of all, though, is his fight song “Otherworld”, which (if you for some reason prefer not to hear its glory) is just a guy screaming over guitars. It tries so hard, it’s unbearably stupid. But then it tries even harder and loops back around to being really funny, and then loops some more until it’s actually a nice jam.

That closes out my list of potential secret bosses for Kingdom Hearts 3, but there are plenty of options I didn’t cover. In the end, I’ll be happy with any fight that’s fun and has a lot of exploding light particles. With luck, we might even get multiple secret bosses! It’s happened before.

Deeborm signing off for now. Here’s hoping Kingdom Hearts 3 will be worth the wait.

... but it will probably just be Sephiroth again.

[moonlightbewitched]

Kirk Hammett: Can I just say one thing? What Black Sabbath was to that time era and to movies like Black Sabbath and all those crazy Hammer and early ‘70s horror films, I think the modern equivalent is Ghost and movies like The Conjuring and The Nun and Annabelle. I think Ghost is connected to all these great modern horror movies that are coming out. I might be just totally full of it, but that parallel that I’m drawing really is cool because I love this band, I love those movies and it’s a way of like bringing ‘em all together and celebrating all I love which is, you know, the dark!

Tobias Forge: I guess that would be very natural, and quite logical to think that. Going further, if we parallel-compare the horror genre with metal, not only are they alike, but they are also alike because you have the creators of what instigated the horror genre that eventually led to a myriad of filmmakers essentially paying tribute to a lot of those older films. Same way that metal was created by people originally playing blues and funk music who then stumbled into making metal, and then all the metal bands that came after that are in a way, unfortunately dogmatically, sometimes just paying tribute to other bands.

I come from a death metal underground, and it’s basically full of horror name dropping!  I know that a lot of classic films made back in the ‘60s and ‘70s, especially in the ‘70s, were inspired by previous horror/thriller makers. Obviously Hitchcock influenced others, Terrance Fisher…

KH: …Tod Browning…

TF: Absolutely! Fast forward to the ‘80s, and especially in the ‘90s and the 2000s.  I think a lot of contemporary filmmakers who grew up in the VHS digital violence era, such as myself, caused the genre in its totality to maybe suffer from being too much of a homage. All the time there’s weird, eclectic little references, and then you sort of outsmart yourself and the whole project by just making it too true to the genre in a way. Whereas I think a lot of the groundbreaking films were made by people who didn’t necessarily do a whole lot of horror films, but were filmmakers in general.  Stanley Kubrick is the classic example of that with The Shining.

KH: I was actually watching it myself (again, I’ve seen it many, many times) about a month ago. The most interesting thing with The Shining [movie] is that Stephen King doesn’t like it. And you know, I totally get that because having read the book and seen the movie more times than I read the book, they’re two different entities. But they totally somehow relate in the weirdest way, they both hold their own ground as artistic statements. Yeah, you’re getting a different story with the movie, but it’s shot so well and is so creepy [that] it touches on the atmosphere, environment and range of emotions Stephen King was shooting for, I believe. And it doesn’t follow the plot, it goes somewhere completely different with a completely different end, but it’s a great fucking movie and Jack Nicholson is just amazing in it. I mean, it goes without saying.

TF: One thing that I think is for me another key to not only that film but Kubrick’s films in general, [is that] as a good filmmaker, I think you need to pay attention to everything from dialogue to special effects to realism. Angles, details.

That makes me put him on a pedestal, whereas I think this is the problem a little bit with the horror film genre horror, it came to be a mass producing sort of genre, where a lot of the filmmakers are not necessarily interested in [that].

KH: And it’s the writing…

TF: There’re so many things…

KH: The costuming. It’s just crazy.

TF: Yes. The entire craft. And obviously he was -as everyone remotely interested in film knows – he [Kubrick] was a stickler for details, and I very much admire that. Where you have a lot of films, especially in the horror genre, that are entertaining but a filmmaker who maybe technically can make a film but is more interested in the special effects, or the nudity. And you see them phoning in a lot of the things “in between,” especially dialogue and the credibility of the character. Whereas Kubrick was so spot on.

KH: I think that point of the filmmaker as an artist not always embedded in making an obvious horror movie is so key. My attention lately has been gone to that book and movie Lord of the Flies, because I have two young boys and somehow or another we got on the subject of that book. I was telling them how I read it when I was ten years old and [how] it’s really an important book for them to read because it shows the importance of culture, social norms, rules and regulations, what it means to live in a civilized society and what happens when all that just disappears. How things tend to turn to savagery. I realized that when I saw that film I was about ten or eleven, [and] it scared the living shit out of me as much as any horror movie I’d seen at that point. Especially the whole thing with Piggy and the monster. It was intense. So I would have to say, Lord of the Flies, the original one from ’63, [the] black and white version is intense and a real suspenseful horror film in disguise. It’s not even in disguise, it is a horror film to me.

TF: Especially if you see it as a kid, it’s terrifying just because…

KH: …because you think, “Oh, that can happen to me!”

TF: It definitely touches upon…

KH: …parenting!

TF: I know, going to camp, being at school.

KH: Adulthood, you know?

TF: Ironically that film, even though I’ve seen the old film, the remake of it came right about when I was about ten, in maybe ’89? That was the first one I saw, and then I saw the older one because it was on TV not very far in time after that. And it’s one of those films I don’t want to see again, because it made me feel so bad. I have a lot of those.

KH: Yeah, there’s a few films that I feel that [about] way too. Another unintentional horror film that scared the living hell out of me when I was a kid, [was] Sam Peckinpah’s Straw Dogs. An intense film. Almost, almost a slasher film. You know, predates that whole genre, but the violence in that film hits on such a deep emotional level that, yeah, that’s one I won’t watch again.

TF: Can I just throw in there a film I wanted to flag that genuinely made me fucking squirm, was a film from the ‘70s called Alice, Sweet Alice.

KH: Oh, I remember that one, yeah!

TF: It was an American film and I guess technically it’s a little bit of a slasher, but as [with] many films that I like, they don’t contain a ton of motives. It’s set outside New York, New Jersey maybe, mid-‘70s. Weather’s shit all the time. The environment is kinda like, uggh. And it’s just one of those films that also makes me… I like it. I like my memory of it. But I don’t want to see it again because it’s like so creepy. It smells.

KH: Yeah, it smells and you can’t really get it off. I know that feeling.

KH: Okay, let’s talk about the devil for a minute. The whole thing with the devil, how I see old Beelzebub, is actually the God bot. He was actually the god Pan, the pagan god Pan that the Christians took and basically used as the model for Satan, you know, a horned person with goat’s legs [and] whatever. So that in itself kinda muddies the waters for me, because every time I see a picture of Satan, I’m like, “Cool, fucking Satan” but in the back of my mind [it’s] Pan or Bacchus. That’s why I wear Satanic shirts all the time; I’m not wearing it for the sake of Satan, I’m wearing it for the sake of Pan or Bacchus, that’s what I’m really doing. And so having said that, for me, the ultimate devil movie, the ultimate Satan movie of all time that really hit me fucking deep and I thought I was gonna burn in hell after watching it, is The Exorcist. I mean, that is like the ultimate fucking devil shit. What can I say, I was a Catholic schoolboy when I saw it. I thought he was coming for me next. I thought I was gonna be possessed because of all the bad shit I did when I was a Catholic schoolboy. I just, I thought I had a big mark on my head. For six months after seeing that film I had to sleep with the lights on.

TF: I have a few favorite cult films, The Exorcist being one. I love the fact that even though the devil is present, he/she only really appears at one moment, really. He is not this ever present sort of monster that they would’ve done in many films today, this CGI sort of person that does way too much [in the way of] interaction.

KH: You have a total point there, and horror films are totally guilty of exactly that, Satan interacting way more than is realistic.

TF: Yeah, and that’s something that I really like about The Omen as well. The Omen I, II, III, up until the ending of …III, is one of my favorite sort of series when it comes to pure satanic horror. Up until the ending, because that’s when someone [was] just like, “Wait a minute, are we selling this point that this devil is-?” No, no, no, no, no! God’s hand just came down, and that’s the ending. It’s like the biggest fucking cock-block ever!

KH: Yeah. It’s like running into a brick wall. You have a point there. But you know, I think they had to do that or else we’d be seeing The Omen 12, The Omen 13, The Omen 14…

TF: Well, there was four.

KH: I remember seeing the ad for it, but you know, by that point it’s like, Omen IV?! Ah, you know…when sequels start going up past three, usually other groups and other parties [have] come in, other different creative entities, or a studio’s trying to keep something afloat or revive it somehow.

TF: However I must throw one “four” in there that is actually my favorite of a series, and that’s actually Friday the 13th IV.

It picks you up right after number three, it starts horrifically and it has all the good components of that whole series, in my opinion. I think three is cool but Four was like that multiplied. And that’s when you had all the ingredients, Jason had his mask, he wasn’t too fucked up, and, yeah. I think that there is a four.

So OK, at this point time was starting to run away from us and we had gig stuff to get on with, so we agreed to pick up this chat in August and as we were about to get up, someone in the room asked if truth was stranger than fiction, so being good sports, we thought we’d answer that!

KH: You never know what’s gonna be true. With fiction, it’s kinda like everything is fiction in the world of fiction, but in truth, something might look true but it’s false, or something might look false and it’s true, and that’s the paradox right there. You never know what’s true until you actually break the veneer and like look. And these days, because of things like the internet, you can’t take anything at face value anymore. You cannot. It’s foolish to. It’s always good to crack the veneer [and] look a little bit deeper at what you’re actually seeing, so I would have to say that you in most cases, it’s hard to find out what the truth is. But yes, there’s been times when I’ve read or seen or found out stuff that’s been true, and no one could dream up this shit in any sort of movie or book.

TF: Just taking two examples that are currently in my head, comparing truth to fiction, especially comparing it to cinema, if you take a film like, have you seen Vice? It has nothing to do with “horror” but it’s horrific.

KH: Yeah, it’s horrific. Especially what he did to his body just to play that part.

TF: Yeah, just from a film crafting point, it’s done very well and Sam Rockwell is the best George Bush, Jr. I’ve ever seen. But imagine if that was just a made-up script. It would’ve been… you can’t make that shit up. It would’ve been a completely stupid movie! But it’s not made up, so it’s a fucking horrendous story that you need to see, it’s a fantastic film.

KH: That’s a really good point.

TF: And [in] that way, I think that the truth is definitely stranger and more horrific than fiction. Speaking of horror, I was thinking about this just today because today we are in Manchester. I took a train up from London to here, and when I was about 12 there was this horrific story that I read about that completely blew my mind, that I’m sure a lot of people especially in England remember and that was the murder of James Bulger, the little two-year-old. I think he was at the time. Four? The four-year-old at the time. And just being close to train tracks, going through England, thinking about him, it’s one of the worst things I can ever imagine. It’s heartbreaking, horrible. And even though there has been a film made about the subject, I haven’t dared to see [it] because I just can’t find myself doing it. I guess that says something about the truth being so horrifying, and to also realize that it was two kids that did this. That just makes me cry for the world and humanity, and that’s way worse than any horror film that I’ve ever seen.

As I already said a few times, to be continued!

Thanks everyone, Kirk