#i wanted to pet some cats before suffering through my exam now i only have 15mins left . tch

[solcarow]

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[mercurialmilk]

Grief is an emotion I wouldnt wish on my worst enemy.

I gotta get this out for the sake of my soul. It's a really long read.

back in June of 2020, my sister and I found a cat while out for a walk. She was really friendly but looked in really bad shape. She had horrible matted fur all down her back, she was so thin you could feel her entire spine, scratches and old injuries. But she was so curious and bright eyed!

We thought she might be a lost cat so we took her in, sent info to shelters and our block watch captain (oh, the suburbs) and took her to the vet.

They shaved her from the neck down because they couldnt do an exam the mats were so bad.

She was suffering from malnutrition, had several broken bones that healed wrong, beginnings of kidney problems, was partially deaf and had several superficial scratches and bad teeth.

A few days later we found her owners. They said their kids gave them 2 kittens years ago and they just live outdoors mostly. I was really shocked, at that time we lived in the suburbs next to a ravine filled with wildlife. Coyotes were seen almost every night.

They said that her brother died a little while ago from a coyote.

I was completely furious but tried to keep cool. I asked if they would be open to us keeping her? They asked why on earth we wanted a 19 year old cat (19 years old!!)

They warned me she had behavioural problems and peed all over their house and the woman (it was a couple) said that she "hated petting her because she was so boney"

Yikes.

We agreed that I could keep her as long as they didnt have to pay the vet bills.

(turns out the man of the couple was a bit more attached to the cats or maybe he felt guilty because a few weeks later he showed up with an envelope with half the cost of vet bills for me)

This cat was supposed to be my sisters. I've never been much of a cat person because growing up our mother would foster cats and the minute you got attached to one it was gone to a new home.

Unfortunately, due to some circumstances, my sister had to go to the hospital for a long time and I became the caretaker for this little girl.

First, I didnt want to let her into my bedroom. Then she wasnt allowed in my actual bed. Then she wasnt allowed to spend the night. All of these rules didnt last long at all.

We found the perfect equilibrium. She loved to sleep on my lap (she's incredibly small and perpetually cold) during the day (I work from home) and at night she would snuggle into the crook of my left arm (always the left) and snore peacefully into my ear.

I moved a few months after getting her. In the summer, she goes out to the patio and sleeps on the warm stones. She has a little harness and a really long leash so that she doesnt wander far. My desk is right by the door so I can sit and watch her. And untangle her when she gets wrapped around the patio furniture.

She never had a single "behavioural problem" like the couple said. She always went to the litterbox perfectly, even on long car trips when visiting my parents.

She doesnt like other cats (I think she is anxious about being bullied) but she likes dogs.

She is now completely deaf, which is great because I dont disturb her sleep with vacuuming or my work.

I completely fell in love. And honestly, she saved my life. She became my perfect companion. I put her on a raw meat diet, her fur grew back beautifully and she feels and looks a lot better!

Thing is, being 19 when I got her, I knew what that meant. I knew the end would come a lot sooner than I'd like so I truly treasure every single moment with her.

Yesterday I got the results of her blood and urine tests. Her kidneys are officially in stage 3 out of 4, meaning that the end is coming.

It could be a few weeks or months but there's no stopping this.

I've never lost a person before but my dog passed away after a prolonged illness in 2018 and it was easily the hardest thing that I've ever been through.

My only regret with my dog was that I was so desperate to keep her alive that I held on too tightly. It's never an easy decision because you dont know if it's the right time.

This time my only goal will be to give her the best possible end. Once she shows me that she's ready to go, I will listen. I already know I'm going to do it at home. I have researched the company that does it.

It probably wont happen for a while. She's still happy, eating ok, sleeping a lot but that's because she's a lil grandma. Right now, her diet is well in line with kidney heath.

I'm still waiting on test results to give me a better picture of how far into stage 3 she is. But the writing is on the wall and I'm full into grief.

Is it better or worse to know it's going to happen soon? Does it matter?

I passed all the stages of grief a long time ago (if you believe in that). I've been at 'acceptance' for a while now. But it really doesnt make it any easier.

I feel so weak and so powerless. I know this will pass and I will survive. I've survived before. I just needed to get this out.

Here's Kida. Although I never call her by her name. She's either Little Girl, Baby or Beloved.

When we first found her:

Vs today:

[obeymeluv]

The Bros and School Headcanons

I have other stuff in mind but this is something short I can put out for now.

It’s my headcanon on the types of school/college people the bros are. I guess you can consider it college AU?

Lucifer

The Type-A asshole everyone probably hates

Doesn’t originally start out that way, doesn’t mean for people to hate him. Soon LIVES for it. Seriously, it’s like his coffee.

Prideful AF. MUST be top of the class!

His motto: “Do it right, do it once.”

Runs on an insane amount of coffee and just as insane (read: little) amount of sleep

The type to remind the teacher about assignments that were due in class if it seems like they’re going to forget about it

Asks about extra credit on day one

If people ask repeat questions that were LITERALLY just answered, he gets pissy and silently suffers

Ends up a little sad and burnt out, wondering if the grade was worth skipping out on other opportunities

Says he’s not going to do it next semester, but gets addicted to that grade high

The “friends” he makes in class are usually fellow rivals and they have a hot and cold relationship that somehow works really well

When he drops the grade-chaser stuff, he’s actually really nice to be around. He has really deep, interesting conversations that are between philosophical and educational (you just have to pull his head out of his ass first)

Mammon

Some people wonder how he got into the class, some people wonder how he’s passing it

Mammon is the dude who looks like he doesn’t know about the subject but is an absolute FOUNTAIN of knowledge

Always has sunglasses on and has some kind of drink within arm’s reach. Usually a very big coffee with lots of espresso

Constant bedhead (even if he says he fixed his hair)

Tried sitting in the front row the first week, kept getting sleepy. Now sits in the back row towards the doors.

He’s either early or late. Never on time.

The one that brings a notebook and a pen to class. Nothing extra.

Usually falls asleep or cat naps. Says he learns through osmosis

This asshole is really good at auditory learning and gets by recording the lectures

Blows through exams like they’re nothing. He’s a good BS’er and gets C’s, minimum. Usually low B’s.

This guy laughs at the Type-A stresser’s and enjoys his minimum studying

Can be suckered into group studying fairly easily but most people won’t study with him because he turns study sessions into anything BUT studying

Knows people who know people. Could probably get his hands on old tests and stuff. If he can, it’ll cost you. A lot.

Levi

This poor baby has testing anxiety hella bad when it comes to subjects he’s not super interested in or that he’s already struggling in

If he likes the subject and feels confident in it, there’s no testing anxiety.

Also brings a drink to class. It’s an energy drink.

Always comes to class early and is usually in a pair of wireless headphones, browsing on his phone

A great visual learner.

His notes are written sloppily and kind of sporadically but they’re decently organized with notes in the margin and things like that

Doesn’t like asking questions out loud. Will either email the teacher, ask after class, or make a friend that isn’t afraid to ask them for him.

If he’s having a good day, he’ll try to make jokes that only make a few people laugh. It’s usually bad timing and he’s a little sad.

MUCH BETTER AT DRAGGING PEOPLE! It’s not something he thinks about. It just slips out! Before his face can overheat, he realizes people are laughing and he kind of basks in it for a while.

Has coordinated stationary; is probably animes he’s into or colors he likes

If he has a laptop, it’s absolutely smothered in stickers

The BEST guy to have a study session with. Something about being in a library or quiet area ramps up his focus and he’s like a second-hand teacher.

Very different from his in-class persona, but is often spot on with ‘If I were the teacher, I’d put this on the exam.’

Want to be friends? Comment on his merch. He’ll start a conversation if he sees a shirt/pin/bag/pencil or anything he likes. It helps if you offer Starbucks or snacks in exchange for being tutored

Satan

Takes pride in his grades but doesn’t go out of his way to make people hate him

Will casually drop his grades when asked, but won’t own up to being the top grade. Very vague (”I did okay. Just like I expected.”)

He more or less enjoys the satisfaction of seeing a good grade come back to him after all that studying

Prone to over-thinking

Probably the first one done, but he’ll do 2 or 3 look overs to check everything before turning it in

Low-key exhausts his professors with written assignments because he gives them a fucking book. It’s all technical and correct but, really, it was only supposed to be three pages!

The one that will yell at the obnoxious people interrupting lecture. Will throw things at them if they’re in reach.

Super protective of his books and class materials. Has a hoarding/scooping reflex when messy people spread out their stuff or unwrap food. The books are not to be desecrated!

If an obnoxious eater/drinker is beside him, he thinks about strangling them to the point where it distracts him from lecture

Usually reads ahead and works ahead

If he gets points off of something, he’ll want an explanation. If he feels the points were taken away unnecessarily, there will be words

If he gets too overstimulated with noises or just hits a point of being fed up, he’ll leave lecture

Rarely brings food or drink to class but can be found at the Starbucks on campus before class. Maybe after. Some days it’s both.

Best notes around. Very technical and perfectly organized. Not colorful or anything, but definitely the envy of people.

Sells his notes/study guides each semester for money

Asmo

That guy who can slide into any friend group

Socially sharp. Can tell who the most prepared are and has an instinct for who the strongest class partners will be

Makes friends with the TA’s before the professors.

Totally convinces that TA to give him hints about the upcoming exams

People either love him or hate him. Most people love him, some people hate them because they can’t be him.

Almost always has a drink and it’s rarely the same. Usually a healthy smoothie or one of the cute juice drinks from Starbucks.

The type to bring in outside food and pick at it while he listens to lecture. Tries to listen, anyways.

Really easily distracted. Gets bored with monotonous voices and HATES teachers who just read off of a powerpoint.

His notes are very colorful and aesthetic but may not be the most informative

Does his best to stay on top of assignments but usually has 2 or 3 big screw ups a semester

Somehow always gets his ass saved. Boy has good karma in stock

This is the guy that things ALWAYS seem to work out for, and they fall in his lap

Proposes cute/semi-extravagant study dates. They are rare and exclusive. Extended to a few choice people (no, it’s not to sucker anyone into giving him class notes.)

Aim’s for C’s because anything more is just a bonus. D’s and F’s are unacceptable.

Will drag a bad partner in a heartbeat. If they didn’t help in the group project, their name isn’t going on it.

Beel

Also one of the types that doesn’t look like he belongs, but he does

Is a fountain of random knowledge

Very strong memory, but not perfect. The type that needs a little push before the absolute WALL of information comes out.

Really strong test taker

Brings tons of snacks to class

Once brought a whole-ass meal to class. He ate it one-handed and took notes with the other.

The guy that somehow gets roped into favors by other people. It’s usually quick stuff and he’s good about setting boundaries to make time for himself and his studies

Want him to study with you? Mention about splitting a pizza or something.

Your hype man. Good guy to reassure you before tests if you get test anxiety

Sick and skip class? He’ll check in on you AND send copies of his notes

Doesn’t always get assignments in on time. Only late once or twice a semester. Either eats the point difference or convinces the teacher to give him an extension.

Will take you out for post-test fun errands

Belphie

Does he exist? You won’t find out until it’s time to take an exam.

Belphie does a lot of research before he signs up for a class. Would like to go 100% online but knows that isn’t realistic, so he combs teacher reviews to get nice, easygoing professors

Has a photographic memory, so all he really needs are the powerpoints and to check out reference copies of the textbooks from the libraries

Tries to take the same classes as his brothers so he can swipe the textbook for a bit

If his only option is a morning class, he DEFINITELY picks the same one as one of his bros to make sure he gets up and goes

More of a night owl

The one that’s addicted to caffeine, stays up all night, and somehow gets 7 assignments done. Has periods of intense focus then it’s back to not knowing what day it is. He just wants sleep.

Usually seen with Beel or Satan. Tends to show up at events with free food.

Loves finals week when they bring in dogs and pets.

Has wireless earbuds and is always listening to a podcast, Tedtalk, or something soothing

Catnaps through class. Even if he’s woken up from a dead sleep, he can answer whatever snarky question someone asked

Takes advantage of the meditation classes and alternative therapy walk-ins promoted by the Mental Health Clinic. He really likes guided meditation with singing bowls.

[maddpopcorn]

It’s Okay || pjm

Pairing: Maine Coon!Hybrid!Jimin x Male!Reader

Request:  hiii can i request a jimin x male reader fic? maybe an angst/comfort hybrid au where jimin is a homeless hybrid who escaped from his abuser owner and is now trying to survive in the streets. the reader would find him and try to help him, but since jimin is scared and doesn’t trust humans, it’s a bit harder than he expected.. (i’d prefer a series but you can make it a one-shot or drabble or whatev boils your noodles lol) thank you in advance and have a nice day!

Summary: When walking down your normal road, you spy a long, fluffy tail. And when it connects to a bruised and bloodied up hybrid who immediately hisses at you, you find yourself trying everything in your power to bring him home….even if you have to suffer a couple of scratches along the way.

Warnings: Angst, lots of angst, burning of the skin with cigarettes, mentions of starving from neglect/punishment, punching, slight mentions blood and cleaning the wound, night terrors

A/N: Wow, you were my first request! I am so sorry it took long. However, I enjoyed writing this piece a lot so I hope you enjoy it, too! If people like this so much, perhaps I could make a second part (I already have one hybrid series I’m planning on making so it might be too much to make this into a series :)) Also, forgive me if there are any mistakes!

Jimin hates being a hybrid. No, scratch that. He despises it. He despises himself. Because of his nature, he’s immediately treated with little to no respect by most humans in society. He’s treated like he’s some type of scum on the bottom of their shoes.

Which isn’t true at all but who will ever listen to him, right? He is just a mangy good for nothing hybrid, after all.

He despises humans. After all of this time observing them, after experiencing them first hand, he has deemed them greedy, selfish and just evil.

They are all evil.

Without his permission, tears well up in his eyes, and he hastily wipes them away out of habit in fear of being caught. He blinks and then dryly chuckles, looking down at his burnt scars that dotted his arms. Who is going to burn their cigarettes into his now dry and cracked skin? Who is going to punch their frustrations out on him again?

No one, right?

He escaped them.

He escaped them.

.

Sighing in relief and with a smile, you wave bye to the last customer that walks out of the coffee shop. Immediately, your smile drops.

“Holy hell, today was busier than a fucking highway,” you groan, shoulders drooping dramatically. You let the broom slide in your hand until only the tips of your fingers are barely holding it up.

“Yeah, why do these people need all of this coffee on a Friday afternoon anyway?” Yoongi complains, dropping his head on the counter, his recently dyed mint hair covering his eyes. “It’s like they’re addicted or something. Damn.”

“Takes one to know one, Yoongles,” you tease, holding the broom properly again and resuming sweeping.

Huffing at your joke, he stretches, popping several bones in the process (that you may or may not be worried about).“Yeah but unlike them, I know my limits.”

“Hah, funniest joke of the year. Yeah, right, dude.”

He reels back like he has touched fire and gasps. “Wha-excuse me, mister but I know my limits.”

“No, you really don’t.” 

“Ye-”

“Yoongi-” you stop sweeping, putting your hand on your hip. “-you drank 5 cups of coffee in one sitting during exam week. And then, the next week, you kept chugging energy drinks like they were nothing so you could finish your ‘precious song’.” One by one, you start listing off all the times he has drank too much coffee and energy drinks. His body deflates with each jab at his pride until he’s crumbling in on himself.

It’s a hot minute before any of you say anything, quietly cleaning up the shop so that you could finally go home.

“Fuck off, pretty boy,” he finally says, middle finger in the air and face heating up. 

You bark out a laugh. “So you finally admit that I’m pretty, huh? Jin owes me $5.”

“You fucking-”

.

“Don’t forget, 8 o’clock tonight, my apartment. Don’t be late like last time, brat,” Yoongi scolds, adjusting his glasses. You throw your hands up, a cheeky smirk on your face.

“Of course. Wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

You wave bye to your coworker as you exit the coffee shop. Humming to yourself, you begin your journey on your normal path to home. Mentally checking off your to-do list before you have to get ready for the annual hangout you and your friends have every week, you spot in the corner of your eye a fluffy, blonde blob. You turn your head, fully stopping and squinting.

“What the fuck?” you mutter to yourself, creeping up on the blob. It grows until it stops at a…

“Holy shit!” You yell, quickly slapping your hand over your mouth in disbelief.

A hybrid. A cat hybrid, to be specific, is laying on the dirty and wet ground of the alley way. His eyes are closed, and you timidly squat down near him to examine him. Matted blonde hair sticks to his face with what you can only assume is sweat and dirt which is also smudging across his face. His lips are forming a pout and he moves a bit, making you jump back in surprise. When he stays still after, you continue your examination. His skin looks dry and his cheeks are sunken in. Trailing your eyes down his form, you notice how worn and ragged his clothes truly are. And how big they look on him. Your eyebrows furrow at his state. Someone did a beating on this poor guy.

He whimpers in his sleep and without thinking, you do something stupid. Something incredibly stupid.

You reach your hand out towards him, to pet him or give him comfort, not really controlling your urges to get close. And that’s when you instantly regret it. His eyes snap open, and you yelp in pain as his claws swipe into your skin. Recoiling back, you immediately grasp your now bleeding arm, eyes glued to it. Three deep scratches litter your arm and blood starts to come to the surface.

Even if you’re the one that got scratched, you apologize.

“I-I’m sorry,” you stammer, letting out a shuddering breath. “I should’ve given you your space. I’m sorry.”

“Leave me alone!” He hisses, shuffling far away from you. Growling, his entire body shakes as flashes upon flashes come back to him. Pupils reducing to slits and ears flattening against his head, he swipes at you again, 

You mentally slap yourself in the face. Of course he would scratch you. You invaded his personal space and reminded him of his abusers. You scared him. You back up, giving the hybrid one last glance, guilt racking every bone in your body for scaring the hybrid before you walk away. 

He doesn’t meet your eyes.

-

You rush home, your makeshift bandage from the napkins in your pocket soaked in blood. He got you deep. But it wasn’t his fault. It was yours.

“Stupid, stupid, stupid,” you repeat to yourself. “How could you be so fucking stupid?”

Someone holds the door open for you as you slide past them, muttering a quick thanks.

“Hi, Mrs. Hags. Bye, Mrs. Hags,” you yell out to the landlady, rushing past people into the elevator of your complex.

“Bye, dearie,” she calls out. “Odd fellow, he is. Isn’t that right, Mr. Whiskers?”

Her cat only yawns in response and she immediately coos, getting right back to her knitting.

Stomping your foot impatiently, you give an awkward smile to the other tenants present in the elevator. They smile back, weird looks on their faces as they realize you’re holding your bleeding arm and you silently wish that the elevator would hurry the hell up. Sighing in relief as the elevators dings, you squeeze through the opening doors.

“Odd fellow,” One whispers out.

“Yeah, very odd,” Another whispers back.

Fumbling with your keys to your door, you curse in frustration as you drop them. Picking them up, you unlock your door after what seemed like forever. Finally, practically throwing open your door, you race to your bathroom, not caring as your door slams behind you. Dropping everything, you quickly get the first aid kit out.

“Fuck,” you hiss in pain as the alcohol seeps into your wound. Tears fall from your eyes from the burning sensation. “Ah, I’m melting, I’m melting…fuck, I’m dumb.”

After 10 minutes of grueling pain, you look at your newly bandaged arm. That was so stupid of you. How could you just invade his space like that? As you focus on your arm, dumb thoughts running through your head, your phone rings, snapping you out of your thoughts. Fishing it out of your pocket, you groan again when you realize it’s Yoongi. You still had time to get there, two hours really, so why was he calling you?

“Hello?” 

“Y/N, wanted to let you know that Joon got the stomach bug so the hangout is cancelled. Hobi and I are taking care of him.”

You can hear groans of pain in the background and Hoseok teasing. “Quit being a baby, Joonie. It’s a mere stomach bug.”

“Feels like I’m dying, Hobi,” he groans dramatically.

“Sounds like you have a handful, Yoongles,” you chuckle, putting up the alcohol and first aid kit.

“Yeah, unfortunately.”

“Okay, thanks for telling me. I hope Joon gets better. I have some stuff to do so I have to go.”

“Yeah, right. Bye, Y/N-Namjoon, did you just hit me with a pillow?”

You can hear Namjoon yelling “Cuddles, now!” before Yoongi hangs up, eliciting a belly laugh out of you. How Yoongi and Hoseok put up with their boyfriend, you have no clue but more power to them. Staring back at your arm, you nod as you come up with a plan to win the hybrid over. Or at least apologize to him. You roll up your other sleeve, making your way over to your kitchen. You’ve got work to do.

-

It’s a couple of hours later when Jimin finally retreats from his hidey hole to see a brown paper bag with a note attached to it. An amazing smell wafts through the air that makes his stomach growl in hunger. He slowly crawls forward, tail swishing in curiosity, and snatches the note from the bag.

I’m sorry about today. Please enjoy your dinner.

P.S, I hear Maine Coons like this fish, assuming you are one. Enjoy :)

-Y/N (The guy who is really sorry about invading your personal space)

He hisses in disgust, shifting backward from the paper bag. The note flies from his grasp and lands in a puddle, immediately getting soaked from the dirty water. What if you poisoned it? Or laced it with something? Are you working for…her? Are you going to take him back? It’s not like he’s never had the wonderful pleasure of starving before. She would make sure of that. He can deal with it. He has done it plenty of times, one more can’t hurt…right?

He sits there, just glaring holes at the bag as rain drops hit him, trying so hard to ignore everything. The smell, the wonderful smell. He clenches his teeth so hard he’s afraid he’ll break them as another sharp pain shoots through his stomach, accompanied by a familiar grumbling. He tries to ignore it. He tries to focus on something else. Perhaps the way his bones are shivering from the rain will do? No, that makes it worse. Makes him want whatever is in the bag even more. It seems warm. Warm enough to make him warm. He wants it. He needs it. So much.

Ignore it.

Ignore it.

Ignore. It.

But, a guy can only take so much.

The smell surrounding him in mockery and the nagging pain finally makes Jimin grab the bag, fishing out the food and digging in, without sparing it a second glance. He’ll worry about the consequences later.

He almost moans from the taste he thought he had forgotten long ago. The fish is still warm, kept in a container that keeps the temperature insulated and whatever soup you got (or made, he can care less) goes perfectly with it.

In a matter of minutes, the fish is finished, and Jimin is gulping down the remaining soup. He pulls back, licking his lips and sighs in satisfaction. His stomach is warm from the soup. He’s not shivering that much from the rain anymore. He actually feels…cozy and it’s incredibly weird to him. Something foreign almost. He places the bowl back into the bag and crawls back into his hiding place. Curling up, yawning, he thinks of you and quietly mumbles a thank you before falling fast asleep.

-

It is a couple of days later when you return, bandage wrapped around your arm. Jimin growls in annoyance and begrudgingly relief. You seem..okay from his scratch.

Stupid human can’t follow a stupid task.

“I come bearing a peace offering,” you smile, holding out two bags.

Jimin’s eyes study the bags and then trail up your hand and to your arm. Annoyingly, in his opinion, guilt racks up. You notice his eyes glued to your arm and you wave your hand.

“Don’t worry about. My friend Jin said it would be fine.”

You lock eyes for a mere second before he’s immediately spitting back, “Like I care.”

He averts his eyes, letting out a loud huff. You sit down, slowly sliding one bag towards him. He views the action from the corner of his eyes. What are you doing? He turns his head just a bit to get a better view and his eyes widen.

“What are you doing?” he practically screeches as you pull out your lunch for the day.

“Taking my lunch break. What else?” you tease, waving the take out container in your hand. “Would you care to join me?”

“No.”

You shrug your shoulders and open your container. “Suit yourself, buddy.”

You begin eating and Jimin rolls his eyes, crossing his arms and looking away. Again, he repeats the same mantra from last time.

Ignore it.

His stomach rumbles and if you heard it, you make no move to comment and instead, continue to happily eat. 

“Wow, this chicken is to die for. Compliments to the chef,” you groan, giving a chef’s kiss. “Sure you don’t want any?”

He knows what your game is. You’re just trying to rile him up to eat the food so that you can do whatever you want with him. No, not this time. It won’t work. After you leave, he’ll throw the food away. He is sure of it.

“I am positive I don’t want your shitty food,” he snaps.

You wince, putting a hand to your chest. “Ouch buddy, that hurt.”

“Not your fucking buddy either,” he growls in annoyance.

“Just slash at my feelings, why don’t yah?”

“Gladly.”

That is his last and final word. You finish your lunch, taking one glance at the hybrid and leave. Jimin sits there and makes a move to throw out the food. He hesitantly reaches out but backs away. His eyebrows furrow at his dilemma. On one hand, should he waste food like that? That would be wrong of him. On another, did you poison the food this time? Can he really trust that you didn’t?

He lasts a total of five minutes before he’s digging into the food. Maybe, just maybe, you’re a decent human. Just maybe.

-

It takes you weeks to earn the still nameless hybrid’s trust. Even then, it was only a small amount. At least you could sit closer together and talk about random things. That’s why it surprises you when he meekly asks if he can go with you this time.

You widen your eyes at his request. “What?” 

“When you leave, can I go with you? Y/N, please?” His ears are flattened against his head and his tail is curled around his waist.

“I don’t even know your name-”

“Jimin. It’s um, Jimin.” He blurts out. He clears his throat, face flushed, eyes looking at every thing but you.

“Jimin…” you whisper, the name so foreign on your tongue. “Pretty name. What made you want to come with me?”

“I…” he didn’t expect that question. “I don’t know. You just seem…comforting, I guess? I don’t know, it was stupid. I’m sorry-”

You cut him off. “Shh, it’s not stupid. I’m glad that I seem comforting to you. My answer is yes, you can come home with me.”

His eyes widen and it’s the first time you have ever seen him smile that wide before. You hope you’ll see that smile even more in the future.

-

“And this is your room!” You gesture with your arm. “I had to quickly clean it since I honestly didn’t think you would come with me so forgive me if it’s still a bit dusty.” You walk in but he doesn’t follow. You turn around towards him, cocking your head. “Jimin?”

Jimin can’t say anything. This is all for him? But, he didn’t do anything to deserve it. He didn’t please you. He didn’t let you use him as a personal punching bag for your frustrations. This is a trick. It has to be. No one is this kind to a stranger, especially a hybrid. A hybrid who hurt you. For fuck’s sake, he scratched you. Yeah, he wanted to come home with you and yeah, he did say you were comforting but he expected that you would make him share the same room or something. He didn’t know what to expect. Just not this.

“Jimin?” Your soothing voice lures him out of his mess he calls his thoughts.

“I-I can’t accept this room, Y/N.”

You must’ve pulled a face or something because Jimin is immediately tense, ready to dash right back out on to the streets.

“Why?” is the only thing you ask.

“What?”

“Why can’t you accept the room?”

He wraps his arms around himself, his tail joining them. “Never had this before. This much kindness thrown at me. Expected to..pay you in return.”

“It’s yours now, Jimin. No payment needed.”

“Why are you so kind to me?”

His question throws you off-guard and it takes you a minute to answer. You brush the lint off of his comforter. “Because you deserve it. I can only assume you’ve been through hell and back. Why not live the rest of your life peacefully?”

“Thank you.”

With that, you smile and leave him be in his new room. A couple of hours later, he joins you for dinner. Whatever you made smells heavenly. Quietly sitting down, he watches as you put the pot on the table in between you two. The bowls are already set and you serve him first before serving yourself. He mutters a “thank you”.

“Dig in, Jimin. I hope you’ll like it. New recipe I’m trying out,” you hum, taking a spoon full of the stew and blowing on it. He waits until you take a bite first. You smile in satisfaction as the spicy fish stew came out perfectly. Just the right amount of spice. He should’ve known better, really. You never wanted to hurt him in the first place but old habits die hard and he finds himself gauging your reaction to the food. You didn’t trick him before, you didn’t poison him at all, so why should this meal be different? Maybe it’s because he’s on your turf now. He waits and when he deems the food is safe enough to eat since you aren’t spasming out of control from poison or getting sleepy from a sedative, he digs in.

Wow.

You’re an amazing cook.

It doesn’t take Jimin even 5 minutes to finish his bowl and your heart aches just a little at the mere thought of him being hungry ever again. 

“Must’ve been good?” You tease light-heartedly. Jimin nods, licking his lips clean. “Want a second bowl?”

His eyes widen at the aspect and you only take his bowl to fill it up again. Jimin wastes no time finishing the second one. He feels all warm, fuzzy even and he looks down at his stomach in confusion. This is a familiar feeling. A feeling he had on the day you two met. It takes him a good solid minute, weighing the pros and cons of asking you if you had made that soup. Would you think it was weird if he told you he had remembered the fuzzy feeling? Would you think it was weird if he told you that that was the only time he had ever felt close to home? Finally, he concludes that either way, he needs to know because he cannot stand the stupid curiosity that’s nagging him.

“I..I have a question,” Jimin mumbles.

You nod, gulping down the remaining water from your cup. “Shoot.”

He looks around the room as he hesitantly asks, “Did, did you..you know, that soup..”

“Soup? What soup?”

“You know, that soup.”

“I’m not following, Jiminie?”

His face heats up at your nickname for him but you don’t seem to realize that you even said it in the first place. He finally blurts out, “The one that you gave me the first time we met! Did you cook it?”

“Oh.” 

“I just,” he continues. “It was the only time I ever felt..I don’t know. Nevermind- it’s stupid.”

“Yes.”

“What?” Did you actually think it was-

“Yes, I made it. I wanted you to have a homemade meal. And I was apologizing to you so I thought it would be a bit more..special I guess.”

“Thank you..”

You both clean the dishes, wash up and head to bed. Jimin is finally alone to just process everything. This could be a home for him. He lays down, relishing in the softness of the bed. He wraps himself with the comforter. It smells so nice and it feels so warm and so..homey. Yawning, he doesn’t notice the smile creeping up on his face as he closes his eyes, sleep taking over.

-

A couple of weeks have passed and having Jimin around is such a delight. Not having to come home to an empty apartment feels so much better. He helps you clean, he accompanies you when you’re watching something on the tv. He lets you ramble about your day at the coffee shop. It takes Jimin a while to grow used to being here. And not everything is so pleasant. Countless of times, Jimin has woken up from night terrors, from flashbacks of that place. And this time isn’t any different.

It’s around 4 in the morning when Jimin wakes up, his eyes flying open from the nightmare. Gasping for air, he looks around. Everything seems so hazy, so dark. All he can remember is him screaming for you.

Oh no, oh no, oh no. You’re not going to give him away, right? Right?

You weren’t anywhere in sight and he could feel himself panicking. He rapidly jumps up, trying to find the light switch or the curtains or something to give light. To give him hope that you hadn’t sneakily sold him back to her. He trips over something and reaches out his hand, grasping a cloth and pulling it down with him. Moon light floods the room and he curls up, sobbing and shaking. His heart is racing and he silently begs for you to appear.

You jolt awake at the loud “thunk” coming from somewhere in your apartment. You jump up, grabbing your baseball bat and tip toe out of your room. Hearing whimpers from Jimin’s room, you drop the bat and rush in.

“Jimin, oh my god, are you okay?” you ask alarmed, freeing him. He’s shaking all over, eyes closed and arms wrapped around himself.

“Please tell me I’m not there again. I don’t wanna go back. Please, please please..” He repeatedly mumbles. “I’m a good boy. I’ll be a better boy, I promise. Please, just don’t take me there.”

Without thinking, you wrap your arms around him, rocking him back and forth. “I promise on everything holy that I will never leave you. I will never let you go back there, Jimin.”

He sobs into your shoulder, gripping tightly at your t-shirt. His tail wraps around you, and you stroke his head.

“Shh, I’ve got you. You’re here, you’re home. It’s okay, you’re safe. I promise,” you whisper. After a long time, Jimin grounds himself and he pulls back to see you, worry filling your eyes and tears at the brim of them.

“Y/N,” he mumbles, diving right back into your arms. You only rub his back in soothing motions.

That was the first night ever that he had asked you to stay in his room.

-

The next morning while you’re making a delicious breakfast for the both of you, he stalks into the kitchen. You hum a little at his presence, asking him if he is okay. He hums in agreement and stares at you. You, already used to him just staring at you, studying your movements, continue cooking. He walks up behind you, ears pinned back, arms opening up.

He back hugs you.

You’re startled for a moment and it makes him hesitate to tighten his grip but when you don’t move away, just slightly humming as you continue to cook, he smiles, ever so slightly, tautening his hold.

“You’re the best thing that has ever happened to me,” he murmurs into your back, so quietly that you have a hard time hearing him. But you hear him. He buries his head into your back, inhaling your comforting scent. “Thank you.”

That’s when you realize that the future for the both of you would be much brighter from here on.

[tokoyamisstuff]

Betrothed Ch. 10 - Illumi Zoldyck x Reader

Chapter 10: Bewilderment

Summary: What is Illumi doing while you are searching for him?

Warnings: Violence, murder, angst.

Words: ~1900

A/N: Sorry for taking so long guys, I recently have little time left to write.

Story Masterlist

“No one is more dangerous than the insane which is calm all the time: he is like a steel bridge without flexibility, and the order of his life is rigid and brittle.  A minor change can cause the functioning madman to collapse.”

There was no time to grieve.

After you had put an end to the puppet that took after your beloved husband, Okogame revealed that he in fact had cloned the entire Phantom Troupe as well.

Gladly, and much to your surprise, the spiders cleaned their own mess and assisted you and your friends in getting rid of the remaining puppets.

And ultimatively, Pretz was the one to put an end to her brother’s wrongdoings, ending both of their suffering as well.

Their deaths left you with a bitter aftertaste: Was there really no other way to end one’s madness? There had to be another way!

Kurapika had run out of strenght, which was only fortunate since him collapsing was the only thing keeping him from recklessly challenging the spiders.

So all of you stood in front of the burning chapel, only able to watch as Okogame’s sins were cleansed through the fire.

What would it take to free Illumi from the curse that was his own mind?

“Not so fast” you gnarled while your friends were still distracted by the tragic view. “Hisoka. We need to talk.”

The mage was already about to leave, yet acting all innocent. “Oh? Who do we got here? The happy bride...”

“Don’t play stupid.” Trying to act intimidating, you built yourself up in front of the much taller man. "You’re what comes closest to being a friend for him, so you must know where he is. Tell me!”

“It’s so long since we’ve first met at the Hunter Exam...” Hisoka chuckled quite amused, licking the blood from one of his playing cards. “I didn’t even know you had relationship problems.”

“Big understatement.” Hisoka’s carefree manner had gotten to you vfrom the very first moment, you had to admit. He almost managed to make you crack a smile.

“You seem to have gotten quite the control over your husband, so I thought our next meeting would be under...different circumstances. Maybe getting a drink together or even murder someone.”

“I don’t have time for your bullshit.” His eyes widened in pleasant surprise, a strangled moan escaping his throat as your knife threatened his neck. “Where. Is. He?!?”

“Oh, my...you’ve sure grown strong. Is that Illumi’s influence?”

“Yes. It is” you smiled confidently, putting the blade down again. “We may fight one day, but this is not the time.”

“Promise?” Hisoka was almost aroused at your words, imagining you and Illumi both challenging him at the same time.

“Whatever.”

“Well...” he waved the card in the air, putting it to his lips as if he was in deep thought. “He didn’t contact me, but word spreads fast. There’s a rumor about a mass murderer in Yorknew City. His only targets are assassins and other criminals. Isn’t that a coincidence?”

Your eyes immediately widened, heart painfully hammering against your chest as you imagined that he escaped his family, yet kept on taking lives.

“Lumi...”

At the same time, on the other side of the ocean, Illumi was wandering a dark alley in the poor district of Yorknew City.

Usually, he wasn’t able to dream in years, or at least it was insignitifant enough to instantly forget about it - yet ever since he had left you and his home, nightmares occured daily: 

Most of the time it were especially cruel things he did on his missions, or murders he performed solely out of his own, twisted desire. Sometimes it were flashbacks about his childhood, which he actually thought to have forgotten about a long time ago.

It all re-emerged now, robbing his sleep - the last thing to keep together the fraction of his sanity.

More than often, he’d dream about you too, of course.

But you’d always only be running away from him, deeply sfrightened. And every time he reached you, without having the intention, his blood-stained hands ended your life as well, leaving him to scream and cry for his precious Y/N.

How were you doing these days, he wondered?

His conscience was calling out to him ever since he had abandoned and left you alone with his family. This wasn’t like him to act without thinking things through.

But he did, and he won’t be able to change the consequences.

“Y/N is strong. Any my family doesn’t have any use for them. They’ll be okay...”

Suddenly, a noise drang to Illumi’s sharpened senses: A weak voice, barely audible, pleading for anyone to hear.

Illumi’s feet moved on their own - maybe because of curiosity, but who knows. And only a few blocks away he found the surce of the voice: It was a stray cat, way smaller than the usual ones, due to malnutrition.

Your husband was merely a bystander, watching a man yelling at the animal that of course couldn’t respond. How odd.

“Fucking thing!” the man balled his fists, swinging them in the air. “Hey! You! Whaddaya looking at? That your cat?”

“No” was Illumi’s plain answer as he stepped into the dim street light, actually not wanting to bother himself with the situation.

“It better not be. Stole my fish at the market, and ruined the others with it’s dirty paws!”

Just when the man prepared to kick the poor animal with his boots, his leg seemed to have magically disappeared midair.

Before the amputated leg hit the ground, the merchant had already collapsed, screaming in agony as he slowly but surely bled to death.

“Here” Illumi spoke casually as he threw a piece of fabric towards the man. He always pitied his victims, at least a little bit. “Try binding off the stump to stop the bleeding. Maybe you’ll make it until an ambulance arrives.”

Already prepared to attend more important matters again, he turned around - but then he heared another, weak meow close behind.

The tiny cat couldn’t even hold itself on it’s feet, yet tried everything to follow your husband’s firm steps. It bit the fabric on his legs ever so slightly, trying to keep him from leaving so fast.

Letting out a small noise of surprise, Illumi crouched down the the cat’s heigh, eyeing it quie suspecting.

Because usually, animals were smarter than that. They had a natural instinct when it came to aura, so it was no wonder that Illumi’s constant hostility and bloodlust always drove them off - even though he actually was really fond of them.

They were easier to deal with than most humans, he thought.

The kitten was bleeding, and his left ear was slightly bitten off by another animal.

Even though it was quite the depressing view, this wouldn’t revoke any emotion inside of your husband. He had seen and did worse, and he had no affiliation with that thing.

“What would Y/N do?”

He remembered how you’d always bring home injured animals, talking about responsibility and how every life was precious somehow. That doing good deeds could make one happy without having an actual advantage from it.

To be honest, he thought it to be kind of hypocritical considering you were a goddamn assassin, but whatever.

Who was he to judge anyone’s morality anyway?

And the pet’s behaviour somehow intrigued him, so he carefully picked it up as he bid the merchant one last look.

“Oh. He died already.”

The Zoldyck family possessed safehouses all over the world, and in big cities like Yorknew City was one, several at once.

Only a few, chosen people knew about those certain locations - and since his family never really seemed to care for him anyway, he knew they wouldn’t be searching for him. And even if they wanted to find him, there was no clue where an erratic man like himself could’ve gone to, so they would take a while.

So it would be fine to use them until he had cleansed the city from all filth before he’d travel to another - even though that would take quite a while.

“Here” he mumbled, still quite unaffected by the animal’s condition as he put it down on the small sleeping cot.

There wasn’t anything else to do right now, so he could save that thing, he thought.

Trying hard to remember how you’d always patch him up, Ilumi got the first-aid kit out of the shelf and gathered a bowl of water. Only when he didn’t find anything to nurture the cat he realized that he himself hasn’t eaten in days.

“Y/N would be furious..” he thought, almost smiling while recalling how you’d always scold him for not taking care of himself enough. “Maybe I should buy some groceries.”

The cat was unusual still, considering hurt animals are more than often very defensive and on high alert. Yet that one let Illumi touch it all he wanted, even purring as he unconsciously began to pet it’s dirty but soft fur.

It was almost heartwarming to him, giving him a slight impression about what you liked so damn much about helping those weaker than yourself.

Yeah, animals were way easier to deal with.

They had no difficult emotions or morals, neither did they want you to understand them. All that was important was their natural needs, and shall you fullfill them, they’d get attached to you.

But humans were different.

Asides from his work, Illumi had spent a of his time and concentration on you and you alone. He had given you food and shelter, also basically drowning you in gifts and luxurity. And he would’ve died for your protection.

Of course it had also been his duty that you’d become a perfect assassin, yet he went very easy on you during training. In wild contrast to everything he had experienced himself, his touch was always tender and full of care.

Yes, he would’ve met every single one of your desires, and yet you were unfullfilled.

Animals seeked freedom. They don’t like being locked in cages.

Was that it?

Were you feeling the same after being locked away for such a long time, like some sort of trophy?

He just now realized that you had always listened to him: His feelings, his past, his commands...but did he ever do the same for you?

Before, just like Hisoka, Illumi was a man of the present: He would’ve never looked back. The past wasn’t worth remembering, even faces of the people he killed vanishing from his inner eye just barely after he finished them off.

And the future? He’d never thought of that.

Illumi Zoldyck was merely a tool of darkness, working with a ruthless efficiency to ensure his place in the family.

He was numb and served no other purpose...right?

But now he had an own goal: Cleanse the world from the profession of those filthy assassins - so no one would’ve to suffer as you or his siblings did.

“Oh.”

Your husband pulled his hand away after the cat softly dug it’s teeth inside of his index finger. He probably accidentally hurt it. “Sorry.”

At least he had someone to talk to, now. You knew best just how often he would rant to himself or think out loudly - and he had to remember how you told him that only very lonely people would do that, because no one has ever listened to them.

“I always told Kill he doesn’t have the qualification to make friends, but in the end it was only me...”

Illumi didn’t even bother washing the blood from today’s work from his hands, falling on the bed with his back first and staring to the bare ceiling with a broken smile.

“Moreso...I don’t deserve to be loved. I really am the worst.”

_____

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[toutallyahoe]

Things We Need More ~ Gavin Reed (DBH)

Requested By: --

A/N: how long have I not touched dbh again? far too long apparently.

fun fact? this chapter is around seven months in my damn drafts.

and this is also my first uploaded one shot for this asshole? asdfghjjkl

anyways, here's something nice because a certain darling of mine needs something for their exams

Also, he may be an asshole but he's our asshole

─────────────────

More: warm hugs

The brunet detective let out a grunt as he flopped himself on the couch, grabbing some of the couch's cushions and groaned on it to muffle the sound while his lover merely looked at him with amused [Eye color] eyes. Arms crossed as he rosed a brow at the brunet male who just laid there.

"Okay, what happened now?" The [Hair color] haired man had asked as he uncrossed his arms and walked towards his brunet lover who let out another groan.

"Robbers... attack... child... t-that's what happened..." Gavin had said as he took the cushion away from his face and placed it on his stomach and stared blankly at the ceiling as [Hair color] haired man had sat beside the brunet's legs.

"And?" Gavin grumbled out some curses as he maneuvered himself to face his lover, rolling his eyes as he did. The brunet had stayed quiet for a bit as his mind went back to what had happened hours ago. Gavin just blankly stare at his lover who's amusement slowly diminish. After awhile of not getting an answer, [Name]'s lips formed into a frown as he looked at Gavin with worried [Eye color] eyes.

"Gavin?" [Name] softly called the brunet who slowly began to shake. Sitting up as his hands instantly found themselves on his face as he began to explain.

"There was so much fucking blood..." The brunet detective had quietly muttered to himself as he then continued. "S-so much fucking b-blood..." Gavin had muttered. [Name] furrowed his eyebrows as he looked at his lover confused and worried. He couldn't understand Gavin's quiet mumblings and he was curious on why his brunet lover started to act this way.

"What? Gavin I can't hear you." The [Hair color] haired had said as Gavin began to quietly mutter again which the male, once again, did not hear. "Gavin, please I need you to speak up a bit louder."

Again, the brunet merely let out quiet mumblings to himself which frankly, slowly made the [Hair color] haired man was a bit annoyed. What was Gavin so glum about? Did Hank piss him off again?

Sighing, [Name] tried again. "Gavin, can't you speak lo--"

"THERE WAS SO MUCH FUCKING BLOOD OKAY?!?"

The brunet had snapped as he glared at his [Hair color] haired lover who seemed to be surprised from his outburst. Despite the guilt he felt on it, Gavin couldn't stop himself but let out all the pent up emotions of the day take over his thinking. "There was a fucking robbery and they left nothing but a fucking corpse of a fourteen year old boy with a bullet wound in his fucking head and a four year old girl who's skull was fucking cracked open!" Gavin had yelled as he felt the tears fell down his eyes.

"A fucking four year old [Name]! T-they fucking killed her without mercy unlike her older brother!" The brunet had shouted as his mind went back to the scene. The brunet almost vomit on seeing the young girl's corpse, face barely recognizable by her parents.

"She fucking died feeling the fucking pain of her head being bashed repeatedly on the fucking floor unlike her brother who was immediately fucking shot in the head! She fucking died suffering [Name]!" Gavin cried out to his lover. The corpses of the two too young children to die was so painful for the brunet detective. Especially the little girl's where she suffered greatly before death embraced her.

"S-she died p... painfully [Name]..." Gavin had quietly muttered as he sobbed. "S-she was too young... they were t-too young..."

[Name] could only hug his broken lover as Gavin clung onto him. Crying on his chest as the brunet had clutched his shirt. The anguished sobs of his lover made the [Hair color] haired male mutter things to comfort him.

"T... they d-didn't deserved t-this..." Gavin muyyered through his sobs as he felt his lover rubbed his back to soothe him. [Name] brought his lover closer to him as he muttered onto Gavin's neck, "I know love... I'm so sorry for you to witness this..."

"I-I couldn't e-even f... find t-the people who did this to t-them..." [Name] hugged Gavin tigher as he felt his lover shake in his arms. "Shhh, you will love. You'll find these fuckers and have them jailed..." Embracing the brunet tighter in his arms as he consoled Gavin.

More: good sleep

For the past few nights, the brunet haired male couldn't sleep. He felt a bit miserable each night he slept alone in their large bedroom without the comforting embrace and the warm body of his [Hair color] haired lover beside him. For three days or so, the [Hair color] haired man was too busy doing work and would often come home late, more so in around twelve or past two in the morning. It also doesn't help that the brunet male as that haunting scene of the case he had weeks ago was still fresh in his mind.

The brunet male let out a tired sigh as he looked at the empty space beside him where his suppose to be lover lay. Gently patting the empty space with his hand as he wished the other male was right beside him now. Gavin wanted his lover's arms wrapped around him as he get pulled closer in a warn embrace. The feeling of his [Hair color] haired lover just there, embracing him and always affectionately mutter sweet things to his ear that sometimes he felt embarrassed about. He missed [Name] dearly. But he couldn't do much but just imagine the male was there beside him.

After awhile of just mindlessly looking at the empty spot of the [Hair color] haired male, Gavin finally felt himself succumbed to the tiredness he had felt as he slept soundly. Not really noticing the door to their bedroom slowly opened for the very male he was waiting to come in.

[Name], the [Hair color] haired male had some small bags underneathe his eyes from the late shifts he was working through and despite how tired he felt, he softly smiled when he saw his brunet lover sleeping soundlessly on their shared bed.

Slowly, the man had unbuttoned his white dress shirt and putting it on an office chair they had in the room, he then proceed to take his black dress pants off and mindlessly kicked it on the floor. Going through his closet to find a grey sweatpants and a black wifebeater to wear, he then proceed to go over to sleep beside his lover.

[Name] wasn't surprised when as he laid down beside Gavin, the said man had immediately shifted and pressed himself on the [Hair color] haired man's side. The [Hair color] haired man couldn't help but smile softly as he watched his sleeping lover cuddle on him as he slowly wrapped his arms on the brunet, pressing a soft kiss on the male's head as he then closed his eyes. It didn't take long for sleep to take his conscience.

The two slept well that night as Gavin was in his lover's arms. Not a nightmare of that horrid case to be found.

More: adventures

Day offs were the best. That is where he and his [Name] could agree on, other than coffee is the best early in the morning. Gavin would spend his day off just laze around his and his lover's shared home, watch a horror movie and midlessly pet their furry baby, Donut. The fat orange tabby cat who they adopted when Gavin and [Name] moved in with each other and had decided to just sit on the house's back porch to enjoy the calm day a few years back.

Gavin was laying his head on [Name]'s lap. The [Hair color] haired man stroking and playing his brown locks. A donut in Gavin's hand as he ranted about a suspect on a case he had few days ago. Talking animatedly as [Name] looks down at him with ove in his eyes and a smile on his lips. Listening to Gavin talk and comment at times.

The two were having a peaceful time with each other when a meow was heard and before the brunet knew it, an orange blur passed by him and saw that it had took the donut in his hand. Gavin let out a cry as he immediately sat up, almost hitting his head with [Name]'s if the other man had not been startled and reeled back because of Gavin's cry and actions.

Gavin, having to sat back up and frantically tried to look at the culprit who took his donut. A bit enrage because it was his favorite one and was planning to hit whatever thing that took it-- only to see a few feet away from him and his lover was seating at, close to the fence was a tabby cat, consuming his donut.

After that, [Name] had caught the furry rascal and immediately fell inlove. The [Hair color] haired man silently pleading Gavin on taking care of the cat but the brunet didn't agreed. His reason was that the cat took his donut. His favorite and last donut.

The brunet male was ready to come inside and hopefully find another snack to eat but when he looked at [Name] who was holding the fat cat... he gaved up. He was stubborn and very against it.

Until the two-- [Name] and the cat-- pouted and gave him a pleading look. Both looks made the brunet cave in and that was when they officially had their first "baby".

A fat, lazy, furry, annoying baby who craves attention. Especially from the [Hair color] haired man. The detective swear that the cat gives him the smuggest look a cat can do when [Name] pets him and switch his attention from Gavin to Donut. Cooing and smothering the orange tabby cat with all the love and affection while Gavin silently fumed in rage as the cat-- a fucking cat had the audacity to look so smug when it looked at him while his own lover was cooing and showing affection to it.

That was where Gavin realize how much he loved yet also hated cats.

"I will call you Donut-- no [Name]. I will name this little shit rug right here. No. You forced me to adopt with this little asshole and I have the power to name him. Now, where was I? Right. I will call you Donut, because HOLY SHIT, I DO NOT FEEL LIKE SEEING YOUR DUMB SMUG LOOK ON YOUR FACE YOU FUCKING LITTLE ASSHOLE-- OH MY GOD! [NAME] LET'S THROW THIS ASSHOLE IN THE POOL!"

More: interesting conversation

It was a hot day and the two lovers stayed inside for it. Just lazying around. Gavin, again, had a day off and he just spended it with him and [Name] in the livingroom.

Gavin had taken on lounging himself on the coach and was playing away with Donut that was laying on his chest. Not really minding the tabby cat as he played with the cat's orange fur. This was one of the few occasions the cat actually lets him be affectionate to Gavin since the tabby cat mostly preferred [Name]'s attention.

Gavin's head laid on [Name]'s lap as the latter was reading on an old book. Paper books were rather rare nowadays and [Name] always loved them than the tablets. He felt like a child when he reads. Remembering back in his childhood where his parents would buy him books to read.

"Would it considered be incest if you fuck your own clone?" Gavin had abruptly said. Tone laced with boredom as he had continued to mindlessly run his fingers on Donut's fur. The cat purring, happy with the affection he was getting.

Gavin's comment made the [Hair color] haired almost choke on his spit as he had paused his reading and looked at the male.

Gavin giving him a unwavered determination on his face when he had looked at the male in the eye.

"What...?" [Name] asked, confused and rather perplexed with what his brunet lover had just said. Destroying the silence and making him ponder if Gavin finally lost his mind.

"Why... explain," the [Hair color] haired had sighed as he had placed a bookmark on the page he was reading and closed his book. Putting it down on the coffee table beside the couch as he returned to look at Gavin.

"Like... well... doesn't your clone carry your dna or some science bullshit? So, isn't that how incest works?" Gavin explained. Making some hand gestures that amuses [Name].

"Just... it is incest to fuck your clone!" Gavin had continued as he made made a face that seemed to be mix with anger and realization. "Wait... it is also kinda gay too, like, right?"

[Name] bit back a laugh threatening to leave his lips as he shake his head with Gavin rambling on about more about clones and if you would have sex with one.

"Gavin... you are gay," [Name] mused as the brunet detective send him an unamused glare when he had chuckled.

"Well, yeah I am shitlock. I am dating your dumb ass," retorded Gavin as the [Hair color] haired laughed. "What I mean is..." Gavin trailed off as he madly gestured something invisible that only seemed to see. It was amusing to [Name].

"Clones."

Leaning down toward's Gavin face, [Name] placed a soft kiss on the brunet's lips.

"Honestly, your adorable," mused [Name] as he parted and went back to his comfortable position on the couch as Gavin sputtered out incoherent words.

More: laughter

Gavin rolled his eyes as he saw [Name] play with Donut. The [Hair color] haired man and the orange tabby cat were on the floor. Donut was laying on his back, his tummy exposed to the [Hair color] haired man that [Name]'s [Skin color] hand would tickle the cat's tummy then raise it fast enough for the cat not to grabbed. [Name] laughing and enjoying his time with the feline as the cat was also enjoying aswell. Purring and meowing with content. This made Gavin a bit irritated.

"You pay more attention to that damn cat more than me," Gavin had grumbled out of a blue as he strutted towards the two as he then plopped down beside [Name] who didn't seemed to mind him.

"Oi," Gavin pouted when the [Hair color] haired man did not turn to greet him nor give a single glance to his person.

"[Name]," the brunet whine as the said man merely hummed as he played with the tabby cat. "[Name], talk to me," Gavin whine as he dragged the 'e' in the last word for higher annoyance.

"Yes, dear?" Hummed [Name] as he picked up Donut and raised it towards his eye level. The tabby cat looking at him in the eye and sticking his pink tongue. The cat's actions made [Name] chuckle as he nuzzled his nose towards the tabby cat's ones.

"Such a cute kitty you are," [Name] praised as Gavin let out a loud groan. "[Name] pay attention to me you dick," Gavin whined.

The said man did not do as what Gavin had whine which made the brunet huff in annoyance. After awhile of the [Hair color] haired cooing at the tabby cat. Gavin finally split.

"Give me the cat," the brunet had stated. [Name] seemed to pay attention now to what he says at the [Hair color] haired man turned his head away from Donut who meowed and looked at Gavin.

"What now?" Asked [Name].

"I said give me the damn cat," Gavin had commanded as he saw [Name] rolled his eyes but nevertheless, gaved the cat to the angry brunet. Placing the tabby cat gently on the brunet's hands as Gavin immediately raised it towards his eye level like [Name] did awhile ago and glared with the cat's eyes.

"You," Gavin started as Donut looked at him in eye with its own version of an annoyed glare. Clearly the cat was not hapoy to be taken away from his quality bonding tine with his [Hair color] haired owner.

"Fuck off you damn pussy-- he's fucking gay," Gavin had said.

Donut was an intelligent cat. Well, cats are more intelligent creatures that humans give them credit for. But Donut was really an intelligent one. He seemed to know what his brunet owner was saying and in return for Gavin's angry words. Donut hissed in Gavin's face and wiggled out from the brunet's hold.

Due to Donut's abruptly hissing and wiggling his body, he successfully got out of Gavin's hold which made the brunet yelp from the hissing. The tabby cat had landed in all fours as he then dashed back to [Name]. Leaping at the [Hair color] haired man's lap as the orange tabby cat then made himself comfortable there.

[Name] laughed at what he had just witnessed as he mindlessly patted the cat on his lap while he watched Gavin swear at everything.

"Mother fucking cat! Suck ass bitch like what the fuck that mother fucker--" and the curses go on and on and on that made the [Hair color] haired man laughed out more. Honestly, why was Gavin always like this? He doesn't know but he loves it.

Gavin let out a few more string of curses as he angrily glared at ther feline until he directed his glare at the laughing [Hair color] haired man. "Stop laughing dumbass," grumbled Gavin as [Name] rolled his eyes and chuckled.

"Sorry but Donut really do not like you," [Name] had said as he took a quick look at the purring cat on his lap. Gavin seemed to catch his words which caused the brunet to roll his eyes.

"You think?" Gavin sarcastically had said. The [Hair color] haired man merely sent him a grin.

It took a second for Gavin to realized [Name]'s words again.

"Did you just... you..." Gavin had said as he look at the other man who sent him a beaming smile.

"What? Cat got your tongue?" Gavin groaned at the joke his lover had said as he slapped his hand on his forehead. Despite it though, there was a smile on the brunet's lips.

"God, you are such a fucking dumbass," Gavin had said to the man as the other merely shrugged.

"You love this dumbass though," the [Hair color] haired commented as Gavin rolled his eyes but laughed.

"Dang right I do!" Beamed Gavin as the [Hair color] haired man shakes his head but softly smiled. Leaning towards the brunet and placed a soft kiss on Gavin's forehead.

"You are such a dork," [Name] softly said as Gavin sputtered out incoherent sentences with his surprise affection. Gavin's reaction made the [Hair color] haired man laugh again.

More: happy dances

Gavin groaned as he stiffly sat up straight. The brunet trying to fix the collar of his suit as he sent [Name] a glare when the man chuckled at his discomfort.

"Having a great time gents?" A voice piped up from behind them. Gavin didn't have to look to know it was one of his older sisters. Specifically, the one who wore a white wedding gown with a cheeky smile on her lips.

"I would if this would be fucking over," grumbled Gavin as [Name] elbowed him but sent the older female a charming smile.

"Oh course we do, Delilah," he said as Gavin rolled his eyes sister.

"When will this be over again?" Gavin asked as he saw his sister sent him a small glare but then pouted. His comment had made the [Hair color] haired man sitting beside him elbow him again. Making him grunt in pain.

"Fine, fine," grumbled Gavin. "I am having a blast with the part Del! Such a marvelous party it is, oh yes it very is!" The brunet sarcastically and dramatically had said as Delilah sent him another pout and turned to the [Hair color] haired man.

"Ugh, I'm so sorry you have to date his ass, [Name]," Delilah had said as the [Hair color] haired man shrugged.

"I'm sorry for myself too," [Name] commented which earned him an angry "hey!" from the brunet and a chuckle from the woman dressed in white.

"Anyways, off to mingle with the other guests now!" Delilah said with a clap of her hands. She send the two men smiles again and even ruffled Gavin's hair which gotten her some curses from the brunet. "Have fun you two!" She said as she walked away. Finding herself talking to another pair of people.

"Honestly," huffed Gavin as he crossed his arms on his chest. "She is still that annoying shithead of a sister," he had said.

[Name] only chuckled as he shakes his head. "You're still happy she's married though, right?"

"Not really," Gavin answered honestly which earned him a raised brow from the [Hair color] haired man. Not that he could see anyways. "I mean... that asshole better treat her right or I swear to God, he'll be framed for murder or some shit," sweared Gavin underneath his breath and the man beside him still caught it.

The [Hair color] haired merely shake his head and a fond smile on his lips as he looked at Gavin quietly grumbling uncomfortably in his seat. The two did wore some formal suits for it was Delilah's wedding. Gavin being a sibling is definitely invited while [Name] was his plus one and date. The two, of course, being lovers and all.

It was quiet-- save from the occasional grumblings from the brunet-- as two merely minded their business. Already finished eating the food that was catered by the wedding caterers and all.

After awhile, the large speakers in the area began to boom some songs. A song appropriate for a slowl dance in fact and it made Gavi perked up for a bit as he looked around. Watching how Delilah and her now-husband dancing in the middle and then some few guests aswell.

[Name] seemed to noticed his gaze on the dancers as he softly smiled. Standing up from his seat, the [Hair color] haired walked around his seat as he then offered his hand to Gavin who had looked at him with a raised brow.

"Care for a dance?" [Name] said with a charming smile that made Gavin roll his eyes but nevertheless, took the offer with his own grin.

"Let's show these motherfuckers how dancing is!" Gavin had said as he heard [Name] chuckle and helped him stand up from his seat. With hands holding, the [Hair color] haired man lead them both to the dance floor. With that, the two faced each other and placed their hands in the right order. Gavin placing one of his hand on [Name]'s shoulder while the other man placed a hand on his hips. The other hand holding each other as they looked one another in the eye. And they danced.

"You know, I thought you'd refused for a dance," [Name] confessed as Gavin sent him a small glare.

"I won't back down from this," muttered Gavin. Hearing his comment made [Name] smile.

"Well, that's good to hear... because I want to dance this song to with you," the [Hair color] had said with a smile as the bruney rolled his eyes yet a grin on his lips.

"Stop being sappy you dick," commented the brunet with a smile as [Name] laughed.

"I will if you change your last name to mine," came the retort as Gavin took a second to process what the other had said while [Name] smiled.

"Wait... did... did you just... what?" Gavin sputtered out as [Name] twirled him.

"Let's just enjoy this dance, alright?" The [Hair color] haired man innocently had said as he gave Gavin a smile. Gavin seemed to think for a second but nodded. A grin on his lips.

"You better come and proposed when I'm in the middle of my damn sappy congratulations to Delilah's marriage or so help me, I wont say yes," Gavin joked as the [Hair color] haired laughed at it.

"And get the attention off the newly wed? How evil," the [Hair color] haired man teased as Gavin rolled his eyes but smiled.

"Fuck them, I am an attention hoe and it's my revenge for making the two of us come here," Gavin replied as he felt [Name]'s hand squeezed their intertwined ones. "We could have fucked by this time god damn it."

"Let's see, shall we dear?" [Name] said as he spun Gavin around again. Then bringing the brunet close as the song slowly ended.

"Also, my answer is fuck yes," [Name] smiled at Gavin's words.

"That's great to hear."

[mystifyingorbit]

Wonder

So.. Uhh, welcome to part 1 of my Red String Loonaverse soulmate au, created and discussed with @s-tarbucks. There will be more parts, so expect some more from this au eventually.

To this day, Hyunjin wonders why her string goes to outer space. It’s weird enough that she can see her string in the first place, when no other she knew could, but hers also leads to somewhere up in space? God, she must’ve done something wrong in her previous lives to be punished like this, a soulmate who knows where, not knowing if she will ever meet them. She’s heard horror stories of people who never meet their soulmate, and it scares her that they might never meet. Hey, at least she has proof to herself there are other living things out there, so that’s one thing to tick of her bucket list. She’s scared, that when they both hit 18, they wouldn’t be able to understand each other.

Sadly, she’s not the only one with soulmate issues. She can see other people’s strings too, but only when she’s in contact with them. When she mentions her noticing the string appear between her parents, they hugged her and explained to her about soulmates, she never mentioned her own thoughts. In her friend group, she sees some of the weirdest strings too. Her unnie’s string disappeared almost a year ago, which Hyunjin realized when she hugged Haseul on that exact day during Hyunjin’s 17th birthday party. Hyunjin brought it up one day when Haseul asked if she'd meet her soulmate. It was a day of tears and apologies. (Haseul doesn’t blame Hyunjin, Hyunjin still feels like it’s her fault one of her closest friends suffers). 

That’s just one of the things she notices. She feels like her ability is a curse, seeing some of her closest friends and family be with people the string doesn’t connect to, having voluntarily blocked out their true soulmate, their strings turning grey from misuse. She’s seen others have their string cut, their soulmate dying without either of them meeting, and she’s seen some who did not have a string at all. She feels like she’s invading their privacy, seeing how they choose to deal with soulmates, seeing some of them go to waste.

She still wonders, who’s on the end of her string, if they will end up like some of the others, their string grey or cut, having never met each other, or if they will somehow, one way or another, find their way to each other.

----

Chaewon believes in soulmates. Everyone in Eden does. She wishes she knows what man is at the end of her string. She’s an anomaly, someone who doesn’t know their soulmate at birth. She wishes she does, wishes she was normal. When she went through the soulmate identification ritual, hers was unidentifiable, yet she still had one, a presence on the other side of the string.

What disappoints her the most isn’t really that she gets teased a bit, she’s learnt to joke about it. It’s how she’s unable to relate to her classmates when they talk about meeting their soulmates or going on dates together. She won’t know until she’s 18, maybe even later if her soulmate is younger. How are they going to fit? She’s never seen anyone around who doesn’t end up with her soulmate, and it scares her.

It’s probably why she’s gotten really close to her best friends. Jiwoo, Hyejoo and Sooyoung, all having never mentioned their soulmates either. She’s patient, but she still wonders, and she hopes for the best. She hopes for a soulmate she can love, she can trust, she can see herself spending the rest of their lives together.

---

It was 4 days after Hyunjin’s birthday when she heard a voice in her head. 

“Hello, are you there?” a soft feminine voice sounds in her head.

Ok, honestly, she’s not surprised that it’s a girl. She’s known from quite a young age that she wasn’t exactly straight (ok, that’s an extreme understatement), so she wasn’t surprised. She hopes the other was fine with it too.

“I’m here.” She replies softly in her head, instantly hearing a soft gasp in her head at her voice.

“I’m sorry… I have to go.” is the last thing she hears, before the gateway connecting them is shut from the other side.

Did.. did she not like her? Was her soulmate afraid that she’s a girl? Will she be cut off from her? Hyunjin is terrified to find out, and all she can do now is wait and wonder. 

-------

Chaewon is terrified. Her soulmate’s a girl… She’s, wait how? Every time soulmates have been brought up in class, in school, everywhere, it’s always opposing genders. A man and a woman. 

Chaewon’s surprised… but does she really mind it?

She’s never been “normal” anyway.. Now it all makes sense really. Her little crush on Hyejoo, how she was never really interested in guys anyway… Maybe her freakout was a bit unnecessary? Oh god does her soulmate hate her now? She did shut her out… I guess there’s no other way but to try.

----

It was the next morning when Hyunjin felt the link again and heard a welcome voice in her head beginning to ramble. “Ummm, hello? I’m sorry for freaking out yesterday, I just didn’t expect this at all and I’m sorry, I’m really really sorry.”

Hyunjin cracks a small smile and laughs, clearly noticing the other girl is embarrassed through the tone and speed of her thoughts. “It’s fine.. Don’t worry.”

Deciding to get a little revenge on the girl for causing her to panic the day before, she decides to flirt a bit to embarrass her soulmate a little more. Adopting a slightly teasing lit to her voice, she decides to ask. “So, do I get to know the name of my princess?”

She responds with a soft stutter, causing Hyunjin to laugh at how cute it is“u-uhhh, it’s Chaewon..”

Her response to that only causes Hyunjin to laugh louder, “Stop laughing, please!! It’s embarrassing me” Chaewon almost shouts at her through the link.

“I’m sorry,” Hyunjin said softly, her smile clear in her voice.  “Your reactions are just really cute.”

“Oh uhhh, ummm…” Chaewon replies, still clearly embarrassed, “Do I get to know your name?” 

“It’s Hyunjin.. My name is Hyunjin.” Hyunjin immediately replies, still smiling brightly at the 

opportunity to get to know her soulmate.

“Hyunjin…” Chaewon says contemplatively… “That’s such a lovely sounding name for a lovely lady like yourself.” 

=

It’s been 3 months since her birthday, and it has been some of the best 3 months she’s had.

She’s always been cheerful, but now she’s even more absurdly so, though no one other than Hyejoo seems to notice the change. 

When Hyejoo brought it up, all she mentioned was soulmate. Hyejoo immediately nods, understanding and happy for her.

Speaking to Hyunjin has been amazing. She understands why they couldn’t have identified her, not with them being from two completely different worlds. They’ve talked about each other, their lives, families and just the world around them. How Hyunjin has an obsession with bread. How Hyunjin has two pet cats, while she herself has a pet butterfly and how butterflies are her favourite animal. Describing their favourite places to go to and spend on their breaks, just sharing everything about their lives with each other. Sharing each other’s Christmas presents with each other (turns out Christmas is universal, even across universes), and just being with each other during each other’s struggles

They seem to fit like pieces to a puzzle. Hyunjin always knows how to cheer her up after a tough day, or to help her sneak in answers during an exam (No one knows she’s connected to a soulmate already, so they don’t bother blocking her connection during exams). It’s always funny hearing Hyunjin act like a cat, herself responding in kind.

She’s never felt more blessed to know someone, but there’s always a slight pang in her heart every time she talks to Hyunjin. It’s been even more vivid this past week, especially after valentine’s day. She’s happy with Hyunjin, definitely, but she wants more than just a connection in her head.

One day Hyunjin brings it up, having clearly noticed her feelings before. “What’s wrong? You seem more downcast these last few days.”

Chaewon should’ve expected this question really. Hyunjin has always been more observant than she lets on. “Spending time with you has been amazing… I was doubtful at first, having a soulmate that was a girl, but these past three months have been the best three months of my entire life. You’re amazing, but I just feel something’s missing.”

The girl in question softens, replying cheerfully. “I understand… I feel the same way princess. I would love nothing more than to be able to see you, how you look like, and to spend time with you together in person..”

There was a soft pause, as they both imagined how it would be like.

Hyunjin was the first one to break the silence, “You know we’ll find a way right?”

“Huh?” Chaewon was confused, “What do you mean?”

“We’ll find a way to be with each other… we’re destined to, after all, we just have to wait and believe.” Hyunjin replies, a hint of determination in her voice.

Chaewon only can smile at that, Hyunjin’s belief washing over her. “Of course, we’ll find a way together. Meanwhile, I intend to spend as much time as I can with you in my head.”

Hyunjin laughs softly, a sound that Chaewon has grown to love.  “I would love nothing more.”

[daydreamindollie]

“She’s Just My Neighbour” 02

Chpt. Summary: Yoongi helps you cope with the loss of Duchess and breaks from being just a stranger to you.

Pairing: yoongi x f.reader

Genre: angst + fluff

Length: 4.1k

A/N: I’m so so sorry it took this long to update this! Forgive me! I had been planning to update weeks before but I had mock exams to study for that were detrimental to providing my predicted grades for my UCAS for University, I’m still trying to fix my life outside of school as well. I love you all so much for being patient with me and hopefully, future updates won’t be as prolonged.

Thank you and I hope you Dolls enjoy the read x

✚          ✚          ✚

Before you were even able to comprehend the situation, your body was already moving to your dearest friend.  The world disappeared around you and all you could see and think about was your precious kitten being limp and unresponsive in your arms, slowly bleeding out onto your already dirt-encrusted jeans.

“Duchess…” you sob, voice broken and saturated in affliction. Your tears are the embodiment of the abundance of despair that’s flooding your shivering silhouette. The pain is excruciating and somewhat unreasonable because you know that you have no cuts or bruises or any broken bones, nothing! But you're kitty is suffering so much right now. That realisation somehow brings your wandering conscience back to your body and finally comprehend the comforting but also urging hand frantically shaking your shoulders.

“(Y/N)…(Y/N)!” looking up, your teary eyes meet worried pools of brown that immediately soften when they take in your pitiful face. It’s Yoongi, “If you want to save her, we have to get to the vet right away!”

Everything was a blur of muddy colours that were tainted a deepdeepdeep red as buildings and long stretches of scenery ran by beside you as you sit in Yoongi’s car with your sweet duchess limp in your arms. You had once read that moving an injured animal too much was bad and could potentially worsen their condition so your entire body was determined to remain frozen around her; if you didn’t move then she wouldn’t be moved either.

Parallel to you, Yoongi’s heart was silently shattering for your misfortune. He knows how precious a pet is and how close you can bond with them despite not being able to fully communicate with one another linguistically. Judging from how aged your cat was in appearance, Yoongi could comprehend how many valuable memories you had made in your cat’s company over the many years they were alive. Although he couldn’t fully relate himself to your situation as he hasn’t (or has yet to) experienced such a devastating circumstance, he can certainly empathise for you though. He has Holly at home and just the thought of losing her to something that was out of his control was crushing to his being, and that was just the thought.

Glancing at you, Yoongi bites his tongue. There’s nothing he could say or do right now in order to calm you down; your full focus and attention were solely for the close friend you had in your lap and arms. The only thing he can do for you at this moment in time was rush you to the people that knew how to deal with the situation and the only ones that could give your feline companion the chances of a continued lifespan.

Upon arriving at the vet, Yoongi helped you rush Duchess into the vicinity where she was hurriedly taken away as all you could do was sit and watch. It was hard for you to put all your trust and faith in these people; you didn’t know them and they had just taken away your dearest friend when she had been the most vulnerable, who knows if they could really help her. The only consolation you were receiving was coming from Yoongi. The neighbour you had shared your excitement in meeting to Duchess. He was your only source of ease at this moment in time and, although you hadn’t known him or were as close to him as Duchess or any other one of your friends, he was there and that’s all you needed - for someone to be there.

“Shhh…” he hushed in a husky voice despite his best attempt at reducing his rough speech into something soft just for your comfort, “it’s going to be okay…” his arm rounded your figure and brought you into a warm and tight embrace as he gave you a handful of moments to calm your heart-breaking sobs, “she’s in good hands, trust that they’ll do what’s best for her,” you nod meekly into his chest, followed with a soft whimper as you cling onto the back of his sweatshirt. The presence of time ceases to exist as you stand there hugging yourself tightly to your neighbour and expel all of your tears and sobs into his chest, soaking his sweatshirt but he doesn’t mind.

“Th-thank you, Yoongi,” you whisper, sniffling as you look up at him with a rose-dusted cheek pressed to his chest, your eyes are big and glossy as an adorable pout had your lips looking plumper than usual. Yoongi’s heart skipped many subsequent beats as he stared down at you, very well aware of the blossoming blush on his cheeks but unable to turn away; had you always been this cute? How could he miss that about you?  

“I-It’s alright,” the young man assures, finally getting himself together as his arms tighten around you instinctively, “I would want someone to do this for me too,”

“You have a pet?” you moved your head away a little more so that your cheek was lifted off of his chest and was replaced by your chin.

“Yeah, you can meet her later if you want, her name is Holly,” you smile up at him, appreciating his attempt at distracting you.

“I would love that…thank you,” now the blush on your cheeks weren’t just because of your messy state.

“Why don’t we sit down?” he directs your gaze over to a set of chairs with his hand as his other still remains around your waist.

“Oh right,” you hurry to sit down, missing the somewhat disappointed look on your neighbour’s face when your missing warmth leaves him colder than normal, “I-I’m really sorry about your sweatshirt,” in your embarrassment, you look down and grimace at the blood-soaked into your jeans and the dried blood on your hands and arms.

“Don’t worry about it but I’d suggest you go and wash your hands and arms,” he motions to the toilets down a hallway, “freshening up, even if it’s just a little bit. It might do you some good,”

Nodding at his suggestion, you stand and make your way to the toilets down the hall as Yoongi sits down in the seat to the right of yours.

✚          ✚          ✚

“Her heartbeat is weak but she can easily get it back to normal with some rest,” you nodded, hopes rising only to quickly diminish at the sigh that followed the doctors statement, “However, her injuries will continue being a burden to her for the rest of her cat years, yes, she’ll always have to be on medication but I can’t guarantee that she still won’t have some ounce of pain. Her level of mobility will be limited if you give us the okay to go with the operation but…” the vet looks into your glossed eyes as you try to keep yourself from sobbing in mournfulness, “you also have the option to take her off of life support right now and end her suffering for good…”

Choking on a sob, you turn to Yoongi, who squeezes your hand as he reaches up to stroke your cheek with his thumb whilst simultaneously wiping away a stray tear. Your eyes plead him for advice on what to do but the only speech he can muster up is quietly asking the vet for more time to consider both options.

“Of course, you can stay here and I’ll leave you to discuss your options freely,” you don’t even wait for the closing sound of the door to tuck yourself into Yoongi’s embrace once more and re-dampen his drying shirt. Once again, Yoongi whispers tender words of comfort into your ear as a warm palm caresses the shaking expanse of your back.

“Wh-what do I do?” you whimper shakily, hiccupping and stuttering in between words.

It takes Yoongi a moment to pick out his words carefully, he knows it’s a hard decision for you to make but he wants to make sure that you leave the building with the least regrets, “If you really love Duchess, you will do what’s best for her…not yourself,” his words had your world tumbling out of perspective. You wanted to be selfish with your decision, the vet had given you that choice, after all, but his reasoning was something you couldn’t go against because, deep down, you know that it was the right thing to do.

Wanting to do right for your feline companion, you nod, voice too weak and broken to speak your decision. Flashing you a proud but sad smile of consolation, Yoongi brings you into his arms once more before getting up and assuring you that he’ll be back soon with the vet.

It felt surreal to run your fingers through your Duchess’ fur for the last time. You were going to miss her and her tender purrs, her gentle nature and sweet-tempered presence about the house. She had been your only company ever since you moved into that lonely semi-detached house; it was going to be hard to suddenly not have her around the.

It was a scary thought but…

“This is for the best…” you try to convince yourself, choking on a giggle when her ear flinches upon the touch of your trailing fingers, “I’m going to miss you, my lovely Duchess,…” knowing that the more you stretch out your farewell, the more painful the parting will be, you turn to the vet whilst leaning into the soft touch of your neighbour at the base of your back, “will I be able to bury her back at home?”

“Certainly,” the vet assures, as you exhale in relief. At least she wouldn’t be completely gone. Biting into your bottom lip, you nod towards the vet, taking one last glance at your feline companion before burying your face into Yoongi’s chest once more as your arms tightly cling onto his slim waist.

You were going to miss her.

There wasn’t any space in your heart or mind for the details on the burial of Duchess so Yoongi handled all the talking for that but when personal questions were raised, he made sure to ask you first. Between you, Yoongi and the vet, you had decided to keep Duchess in the clinic’s mortuary refrigerator while you order a biodegradable coffin, once it’s delivered, you will inform the clinic in advance before going to collect Duchess and proceeding with her burial. In your head, you already know the perfect place to bury her - it was bittersweet attainment, considering the circumstances. She’ll forever be peaceful asleep underneath the valerian flowers she loved to be around so much, unable to resist the catnip-like effects it had on her.

She’d love it so much there…

✚          ✚          ✚

There were no tears left for you to cry but your heart was still aching. Yoongi could read this from the disconsolate look on your face. He had been so used to seeing you happy and cheerful from outside his windows, it was always peculiar to him how jovial you were despite his, somewhat, instinctually malevolent actions towards you. However, he found your current state to be even more bizarre. The shadow cast over your sweet face and the heavy pull of your lips into a deep frown didn’t suit you at all. Despite your features still being present, the endearing charm of your profile was non-existent to him.

The uber ride home was slow but warm as Yoongi had you curled up in his arms. Your voice had become imaginary as you felt it gone from having cried and sobbed and wailed so much. Yoongi had your nose tucked into the crook of his neck as you sat in the middle seat of the back, seatbelt pushed aside so that he could have you lean into his protective embrace and almost have your entire torso laying across his. His fingers running through your silk strands was therapeutic in that it helped you calm down enough to finally begin registering the reality of the situation. In consolation for yourself, you reasoned that Duchess was already quite old for a feline, you knew that you had given her everything you could to ensure she has lived the best life any cat could have. You only wish to continue honouring her by burying her under her favourite blossoms and keeping up traditions that you’ve only made and kept for Duchess.

In silence, you were driven back home, and again, in silence you were walked to your front door by Yoongi, “make sure to get some good rest tonight, if you need someone to talk to, I’m right next door.” his voice was monotone as always but held an ounce of sympathy for your circumstance. Despite how subtle the change is, you still appreciate him for helping you cope through this. It had come out of nowhere and you weren’t at all prepared. Anybody could have accompanied you at that vet clinic but out of everyone that you knew, who would have dropped everything knowing full well how much Duchess means to you, Yoongi was the one that stayed by your side - the neighbour that was adamant at remaining a stranger to you showed you an entirely new side to him. He held you in his arms, handled you with care and immersed you with a chocolatey gaze full of compassion you had never seen in anybody’s eyes before.

“Please stay with me…” you whispered as he turned away being held back by the sweet vulnerability in your voice and the feeble grip you have on his sweatshirt hem. Upon looking back at you with hesitance in his eyes and a gentle objection ready to leave his pink lips, you pressed further, “I don’t want to feel alone.” the stiffness in his shoulders melted, “Duchess has always been there for me and I know you’re right next door b-…but I don’t think I’m ready to be completely alone yet…”

“One night,”

“One night.”

As you lead Yoongi to the couch, the male reflects over who you are from what he’s been able to gather. You’re a sweet girl, always smiling and happy and glowing, like the sun as well as its plant counterpart, the sunflower. Away from much of civilisation, he can tell that you’re lonely but still maintain an appreciation for the fauna that can only be found in rural areas. Certainly, despite the loneliness he’s been able to see in your eyes, he can tell that you crave a peaceful setting like him. However, Yoongi only hated being around so many people and that was why he was able to cope being so isolated as opposed to being in the great city, you, on the other hand, desire the close companionship of others so, not only was the rural life ideal for you but it was also detrimental to your mental well-being.

Staring down at you, drowsy in his arms as you lay atop him with your rosy cheek pressed into his chest, he can’t help but feel his heart clench at your state of affairs. You had lost your close, dearest friend. Albeit being a feline, Yoongi could easily surmise that Duchess meant the world to you. In all honesty, if he was in your position and if it was Holly instead of Duchess he found unresponsive at the side of the road, he wouldn’t know what to do with himself. Yoongi liked animals more than people and he had come to love Holly as much as the music he produced and composed. That must be what it feels like for you. Someone so sweet didn’t deserve this.

He was quick to recognise your efforts in wanting to befriend him and be on good terms and although he definitely wants to reciprocate all your kind gestures, he can’t seem to help always turning you down in some way, shape or form. Wrapping his arms securely around you and giving your waist a brief squeeze, Yoongi takes a moment to scoot you higher up his chest so that he could nuzzle his nose into the crown of your head. You always have such a pleasant scent about you. He always gets a whiff of it every time you attempt to confront him with your stupidly cute smile, sweet voice and innocent charm. It was always so so so tempting to just reach out, pull you into his arms and bury himself in your fragrance. Now that he has the chance, he can go ahead and-

What was he doing?

Biting his lip and scowling in guilt, Yoongi pulls back to throw his head against the arm of the couch and stare up at the ceiling. How dare he take advantage of you in this situation? He isn’t a man. He’s a little boy that doesn’t know any better and is allowing his secret desires get to his head…but when was the last time he had held a woman in his arms and savoured her scent and supple, bouncy body?

Never.

He has never had a girlfriend.

He has never held any girl intimately in his arms before.

He was just a pathetic guy with no self-restraint when it comes to the girl next door.

He wonders why that is; there have been many girls before you that he had encountered and been in prolonged contact with but none of them had been able to provoke such a reaction or emotion from him. You were a dangerous little minx.

‘Holly is better at cuddling…’ the frustrated male pouts at his poor attempt at finding reasons for not liking the fact that you were willingly embracing him and finding solace in him alone. He hated being around people but you seem to be growing into the only other exception aside from the six dorks he calls his friends. Did it feel this good to be needed by someone? Yes, he has his dongsengs who call him hyung and look to him for advice, but this is different. This is a different kind of dependence and he’s scared to admit that it feels so so so good.

Looking down once more, Yoongi dismisses the warmth that suddenly coats his cheeks at the sight of you wrapped up in his arms and blanketed by the moonlight. This domestic scene makes his heartache and he can’t seem to decide if it’s a good or bad thing.

✚          ✚          ✚

If it weren’t for you forgetting to close the blinds and day demanding the light of the sun filter in through the gap in the curtains, you would have gladly continued sleeping. Despite the horrors of the day before, that had been the most comfortable and restful sleep you had ever had the privilege to indulge in. It’s all thanks to him - Yoongi.

You can’t comprehend how much more of a wreck you would have been if he wasn’t there for you yesterday. In gratitude, you smile down at the male who happily continued to doze away, light snores escaping through the small, plush parting of his lips. This must be the first time you’ve ever seen him looking so soft. Even though this soft aesthetic is exactly parallel to the one he usually wears, you appreciate this appearance on him.

Flashes of the night before play in your head just as you’re about to reach out and fiddle with the mischievous black locks that fell haphazardly across the expanse of his forehead. Never have you ever been so embarrassed in your life. He had still been a stranger to you but you clung onto him for dear life comparable to one's lifeline to sanity. Yesterday night, he was your lifeline. You’re, both, grateful and red-faced at the fact. Not wanting to have him wake up to your entranced antics, you quickly but carefully lift yourself away from him before draping the sofa blanket across his form and tucking him comfortably in. His grunt of content and mumbling sigh of gratitude had your face lighting up as you vowed to make up for your discomposure and express gratitude for the happenings of yesterday.

Eager to communicate your gratefulness and apology as well as distract yourself from the painful ache that pulsed numbly in your chest, you slipped into the kitchen. It quickly comes as a realisation to you that neither of you had been able to indulge in a proper dinner the night before, which only spurred you on to cook the best meal you could for your stoic yet sweet neighbour. You opt for a traditional Korean breakfast, wanting to make something as filling as possible with the amount you would be serving him. There’ll be a lot to eat but you’re sure he’s just as famished as you.

Thankfully, you have banchan pre-prepared for a breakfast such as this, you also have some soups in the fridge you have made and kept throughout the week. Looking into the chilly compartment, you spot haejangguk and galbitang. Perfect! You take the two containers out to transfer their contents into separate, small saucepans and begin heating them up on the stove. As soon as you hear the pots’ contents bubbling up, you wait another few seconds before moving them into two bowls where you then allow yourself to make fresh jeon and heat up cooked rice within the rice cooker. To treat him well, you also move on to cook some bulgogi. You are swift and in your element when making things, especially food for others. Pulling out a steak of mackerel, you get ready to tease your ever-present kitty in temptation for the slab of sweet fish only to frown deeply at the realisation of her not being there. Sighing deeply, you work to finish up the breakfast as well as plating everything presentably.

“Something smells nice.” your neighbour walks through the kitchen doorway and instinctually settles himself at the kitchen table.

“You think so?” you flash a smile, finding the compliment refreshing compared to his usual silence and ignoring the blush brought about by his even deeper and rougher voice. Was he always so sexy?

“Mmm,” just his hum of confirmation has your knees quaking and hands trembling from the seductive gruffness of his voice. Has he been gargling testosterone or something? “I can’t remember the last time I had a full breakfast,” he comments once more as soon as you have everything placed at the table whilst a tower of dishes wait patiently in the sink.

“Well I hope you like it, I don’t want you disliking the first traditional breakfast you’ve had in a while,” you watch him take his first bite, savouring the taste for a moment before nodding with a hum.

“It’s tastes great, thank you for being so thoughtful.” he may be rough on the outside but he can demonstrate good manners when he intends to, it seems.

The two of you continue with breakfast, making idle chat, smiling normally. He allows you to put up this facade but he can see the glances you make towards the corner of the room where there are empty bowls for food and water. This could be your way of coping with the loss so he’s hesitant to break you from it, not until he’s watching your back doing the dishes as a fragmented tune is hummed through your pink lips. He’s a coward for finding the confidence to approach you when he isn’t staring into your doe eyes but he will allow it, the important thing is that he actually reached out to you with this confidence rather than not at all.

Peering over your shoulder, he can tell that you’re almost done with washing up and misses the sudden stiffness of your shoulders when you catch a trace of his dominating fragrance.

“If you need anything…” he begins, taking a moment to wonder if he dares to be so close, he can smell the faint scent of your hair again and fears that his temptation may turn his innocent intentions dangerous. How shameless he’d be to do so, considering your situation, “I’ll be just next door, okay?” tears well up in your eyes and if it weren’t for what he says next, you’re sure you’d have been able to keep it in, “you’re not alone,” but you couldn’t keep it in. Rushing to dry your hands, you hastily turn and capture him in a tight embrace, muttering your thanks repeatedly before pulling away mere centimetres, still pressed into his chest to smile up at him.

“You’re a great friend, Yoongi,”

“I’m a friend?” he finds your words hard to comprehend and he doesn’t know if it’s because of the sweetness of your smile or the fact that you already consider him so close.

Has he fallen for you?

“Of course…”

✚          ✚          ✚

Taglist: @viamagicul

[dreamingbrownie]

Tagging games #5

I’ve been tagged by @fandom-glazed and wanted to do this anyway, so here we go! Tagging anyone who wants to do this ^__^ 1. what’s your favorite way to dress? Black all the way. I’m a fancy goth on the inside and trying (but most likely failing) on the outside. 2. If you could change anything about yourself, what would it be? Not to be so voulnerable to the people that mean a lot to me would be nice. Not getting attached so fucking fast. 3. What movie/game/etc. helps you calm down? I tend to love movies reducing me to a sobbing mess, so that doesn’t count as calming me down, does it? As for a series, I’m all for Merlin BBC at the moment which I watch unfrequently with @fandom-glazed on Netflix and usually laugh my ass off at Arthur and Merlin’s antics. :D 4. What does your room smell like? Dust, nailpolish, some tea and the slightly burnt smell of my old heaters. 5. Do you like to organize? Hell fucking no. I’m an ADD person, nope, I don’t. 6. What kind of music would you listen to if you could only choose one? German rock / gothic rock. Unheilig, Staubkind, Blutengel, Lord of the Lost, Letzte Instanz, that kind of thing. Not that either of those bands would ring a bell with most of tumblr users, I assume. 7. What song is your aesthetic? Oh man, making me choose there is mean. Ghost Love Score by Nightwish, Stand my ground by Within Temptation, Morgana by Lord of the Lost. Hard and heavy. 8. What color do you think goes best with your personality? Crimson like my hair right now, probably. 9. Do you believe in auras? Nope. 10. What do you wish you hated, but actually like? Ballet. To wish for having been introduced to how to ruin your body in the most beautiful way as a child is kind of unhealthy. 11. Vague about your crush(es) Valentin Winter / van Porcelain. That man. Go to his tumblr @valentinvanporcelaine and dare ask me again why I’m addicted to his aesthetics. 12. Is there someone you have mixed feelings towards? Yep. Not talking about specific people in my personal life here tho.  13. Talk about an AU or story you came up with Oh boy, here we go. If you get me started on my vampire novels, we’ll be here all day and I won’t even be half way finished. I adore my own characters to a decree that might be weird, I ship some of them and the main gay pair Count Louis and his life long best friend and personal vassal Chris, later Knight of Alderton, to death and writing anything with those two idiots in love soothes me so much. The main trilogy (A shimmer of Red, Black and Silver respectively) is huge (as in 200k for the first, 140k for the second and 110k as of yet for the unfinished third) but not finished yet, I’m almost there and would have been a year ago if I’d just get my arse out of the Fantastic Beasts Fandom and saunter off to writing my own stuff again. Unfortunately, Albus and Gellert own my ass at the moment and I’m overflowing with plotbunnies that won’t go away on their own. I know my mind. I need to write them all down before I get any peace at all. Lol. 14. Do you like makeup? No, not really, I like sharp-winged-eyeliner though. 15. Do you prefer space or the ocean? Ocean all the way. Space is fascinating and I’m a massive nerd for SpaceX because their projects are so promising for the future of mankind, but standing at the shore, being able to breathe properly again (asthma kid here, hi) and cry from sheer relief of hearing the waves crash against the cliff or roll onto the beach again is my life blood. I’ll have that next week again. Fucking finally. The sea soothes me so, so much and I suffer from constant longing for distance. We have a very fitting word for the feeling in German. Fernweh. Roughly translated to “I want to get far away from here so much it hurts.” Yeah, that’s the German language right there for you. 16. If you could pick any planet besides earth, where would you live? Pandora, probably. You know, three meters tall blue humanoids, a captivating nature, trees large enough to be a bother for the planet’s rotation, probably? Yeah. I’d like that very much. 17. What form of government do you like the most? (capitalism, socialism, etc.) I’m quite content with the German system of Social economy. Pure capitalism, socialism and communism are shit, don’t work in the long run and should just be abolished altogether. 18. What animal would you keep as a pet, if you could? Give me a black cat, please 19. What do you think our purpose is in the universe? To find our place between the stars, become a multi planetary species and to develop a way that’s not as destructive to the planet we inhabit. There’s a beautiful sentence that sums it all up in Interstellar from Cooper: “We might have been born on earth, but we don’t have to die here.” 20. Do you believe in god(s)? Nope. Atheist all the way. Before anyone misunderstands me, though: believe whatever you want to, I don’t judge people for their religion, it’s just so not my tea. 21. Is there a song you can’t handle listening to, even though you like it? Yep. Chasing cars by Snow Patrol. 22. What ex do you miss the most, if you have one? Mean question. I only have an ex-girlfriend and sometimes I miss her gentleness and how instantly she saw right through me, but she replaced me, we’ve been done for a bit more than five years now and I’m over her. :) 23. Do you like soft, fluffy blankets or rough/smooth blankets? Soft, fluffy blankets all the way. 24. What is your favorite thing to learn about? History. What do you think I’d study that for? :D 25. What country’s history do you find the most interesting? Man, that’s a mean one again. I’m pretty solid on English history, but I don’t know the first thing about Asian history altogether because german schools don’t teach that and we’ve got a different subject for Asian culture in university so it’s not included in my must-do-schedule too, but I’d like to learn more about it soon. 26. What do you think about genderbent ____ (insert someone here) Nope, noping right out, nopedinopenope, not my tea. At all. 27. What breakup was the hardest, if you had one? The one I had was... bad. Not talking about that here any further tho. 28. Do you have someone where you can’t decide if you like them romantically or just as a friend? A couple of weeks ago, my answer would have been yes, but I’ve got that all sorted out now. Not dwelling on it, though. It doesn’t matter. 29. What do you think about tumblr discourse? Ughhh. Exhausting most of the time. I loved the metas in the Sherlock fandom before it all fell apart and I like Fantastic Beasts metas, but people get so emotional so fast that normal discussions are all but impossible here. 30. What instrument do you wish you could master? Piano. Still salty that I’ve been forced to stop that as a child. 31. How easy is it for you to be honest? Very. I’m a very honest person and I’m shite at lying. 32. Do you have any strange interests? Fandoms, probably? xD I find fossils infinetely fascinating, anything conserning dragons (that sounds strange in context, I’m well aware that they don’t exist) and the way stars are born in large nebulas is something poetic to me. 33. Do you have any strange fears? Strange? I dunno, I’ve just about ran out of the kitched screaming at the top of my lungs when a fucking spider dropped ON MY HEAD yesterday evening, you tell me if that’s strange. Drowning would suck a lot, I guess. Anything that makes you suffocate. Nope. 34. What food do you binge on when you’re lazy? Toast with something on it. I did that in exam week last week, not because I’m lazy but because I just did not have the time or the nerves for cooking. 35. When you get angry, how do you show it? I go all quiet and drill my posture to absolute perfection until it hurts. You’ll notice when I’m mad. Seldom happens, though, I’m hard to offend. 36. Do you have any impulsive movements? (twitches, ticks, flapping, etc.) Picking fingers. Bad habit that I’m trying to get rid of. 37. What do you listen to music on? YouTube and Spotify on the PC, used my phone a massive lot for that during the summer too but now with all the layers of jackets and coats and such it’s a bit hard to stuff my large phone anywhere. 38. Are you left brained or right brained? Uhhhh what? I’m right handed, but I don’t think I have any tendencies otherwise. 39. Earbuds or headphones? Earbuds. 40. Do you like light blankets or heavy blankets? Light blankets for around the flat, heavy in bed. I’d like to be able to breathe.

[akualapaau]

.: stolen from @yolodari because I need to flesh out this verse anyway :.

TEN LAYER CAKE

LAYER ONE : THE OUTSIDE

Name: "Leilani Kapula Mahea Nahoa Kanunu Kekauoha, at your service! ... Or, Lani, for short.” 

Eye Color: “Hazel. I have my mother’s body and my father’s eyes. At least, that’s what I’ve been told. I remember her looking different but her and Papa told me I have her pre-me body.”

Hair Style/Color: “It’s just plain brown. In full sunlight, lighter bronze streaks show up. I wear it long because I like it. There’s no reason for me to have it long because I always have it tied up or otherwise restrained out of my work.”

Height: “I’m a little wee, even by human standards. I was huge in Ironforge, though.”

Clothing Style: “A long coat with lots of pockets or a bag is essential. Other than that, I’m used to wearing just about nothing. It’s one of the things I enjoy the most about around the great Illidari. Everyone else is just this side of naked so I don’t feel out of place wearing island gear. And most of them are covered in more scars than me so I’m kind of less self conscious about not being exposed. I definitely cover up if I’m going outside.”

LAYER TWO: THE INSIDE

Your Fears: “Spiders. And being useless in a time of crisis.”

Your Guilty Pleasure: “Children’s stories. Fairy tales. I’ve noticed some cultures are a little more bloodthirsty than others with the things they tell their children but overall, little bedtime stories make me think of a less stressful time of life.”

Your Biggest Pet Peeve: “People not putting things back exactly where they found them. There is order to my chaos!”

Your Ambition for the Future: “Travel the world, learn everything there is to know about every race as far as medical and healing goes, maybe get some surf and sand in when I can...”

LAYER THREE: THOUGHTS

Your First Thoughts Waking Up: “It’s usually along the lines of, ‘Okay, up on the count of three. One... two... HEAVE!’ and I have to go over it several times before I’m actually able to get up and move.”

What You Think About the Most: “How to phrase things without coming across as a mad scientist, like asking if I can have the corpse of the next dead out of any race so I can tear them apart and see how they work. I haven’t yet come up with a way that doesn’t immediately make people wary of me. I already work so hard to earn their trust so they’ll let me around even races that don’t usually tolerate my own, the last thing I want to do is have them hate me because I have a need to know.”

What You Think About Before Bed: “I think about going to bed, and then realize how much stuff I have to do, and then just don’t go to bed. If I go to sleep it’s normally not in a bed but on a desk or in a chair or even slumped over on an exam table.”

Your Best Quality Is: “I am obnoxiously insistent on helping. And although I really hate having to figure something out, I’m really good at it.”

LAYER FOUR: WHAT’S BETTER?

Single or Group Dates: “I... I don’t. Mostly because I don’t have time or anyone interested, but also because the last time I dated it didn’t end well and I’m still not real over it yet. He was not a good guy but I was lonely. The last time I saw him was when my neighbor, Lahoko, was dragging him out of my house by his neck, and Lahoko’s wife stayed with me for a few days. I don’t know what happened after that. Nobody on the island saw my ex again, but Lahoko returned with a severed tusk. It was neat because I got to figure out how to reattach it. He was very patient and sat still while I worked and moved only once to tell me in no uncertain terms ‘No more boys for you’ so...” 

To be Loved or Respected: “You can hate me all you want but you will respect me or there will be issues.”

Beauty or Brains: “Brains. All day, every day.”

Dogs or Cats: “I’m actually a cat person! I prefer them, I’m more like them than a dog... but I have a dog. Granted, he was a gift and he’s very useful and I would be out to tide with no paddle without him but I would not have made the conscious choice to have a dog on my own.”

LAYER FIVE: DO YOU?

Lie: “I... bend the truth to my advantage, and especially to the advantage of my patients, especially especially to parents. Will this otherwise perfectly healthy and robust orc child die from a small handful of poisonous berries? Most likely not. Will I tell his father that he might, if it means making sure the child will be properly treated instead of just left to suffer? You bet your ass I will.”

Believe in Yourself: “No, but I believe in what I know and I believe in my limitations.” 

Believe in Love: “I believe in different kinds of love. I believe in the love I have for my island and all those on it. I believe in the love they have for me.I believe in the love of my friends and the family I made with the other misfits in the world, but as far as romantic love goes, I’m not sure there’s any for me. If it happens, it happens. I won’t chase it. I have too much else on my plate. Let it come to me.”

Want Someone: “It would be nice. I’m in no hurry. Let me cure the world and then I’ll worry about it.”

LAYER SIX: EVER?

Been on Stage: "As a speaker and a lecturer for some things I discovered but not as a dancer, if that’s what you’re asking.”

Done Drugs: “... I’m in pain a lot. I have to do something for it.”

Changed Who You Were to Fit In: "I reign myself in but I don’t change it. I know I can be a little much to handle so I try my best to keep that under control but that ‘little much’ becomes ‘just enough to get us out of this’ sometimes.”

LAYER SEVEN: FAVORITES

Favorite Color: “Orange, pink, white, blue, yellow, red... all the colors of the sunsets I grew up under.”

Favorite Animal: “The owls in the Night Elven cities I’ve been to have all been beautiful and weirdly affectionate. I love it!”

Favorite Food: “Poi. It never fails to cheer me up. Finding the right stuff to make it is next to impossible, though.”

Favorite Game: “I am NOT good at darts but it is fun!” 

LAYER EIGHT: AGE

Day Your Next Birthday Will Be: “November twenty third.”

How Old Will You Be: “Thirty three.”

Age You Lost Your Virginity: “We were both sixteen.”

Does Age Matter: “To a point. For the longer living races, being five or six hundred years older than me doesn’t really matter, as long as it translates over to about the same age range. Shorter living races, I cap it at seven years difference.”

LAYER NINE: IN A BOY OR GIRL

Best Personality: “Oh, wow, just someone who puts up with me and won’t try to force me to be something I don’t want to be.”

Best Eye Color: “It doesn’t matter. I don’t look at them much anyway.”

Best Hair Color: “Just so that it’s long, I don’t care. I like to braid stuff. It calms me down.”

Best thing to do with a Partner: “Make it through a shift alive. ... oh, you mean a romantic one? Uh... let’s come back to that one.”

LAYER TEN: FINISH THE SENTENCE

I love: “My job! I hate that it has to exist but I do love it.”

I feel: “Honestly, I’m in pain right now. I let Ruslan to go run around and investigate this new place so that if I need to rely on him, he won’t be distracted sniffing around at something he just discovered. It means I’ve had to be fully on my own for moving around on hard metal flooring. It’s not fun. I need to get better shoes for this place, I think. I wonder if there’s a bath to soak in?”

I hide: “A lot of things but mostly how much I want to stick my hands in the nearest injury.”

I miss: “Home. My grandfather. My parents.”

I wish: “People could trust each other even a little. Seriously! I’m a medic! I’m here to learn and help, not to cause harm!”

[fuzzballsheltiepants]

Name Games

Inspired by this amazing post by @andrews-nothing.  Neil’s cat is sick, so he brings her to the vet.  A meet-sort-of-cute ensues.  Read on AO3 if you prefer. 

The waiting room was a cacophony of nonverbal vocalization, barks and plaintive meows and the insistent screaming of some sort of parrot.  Neil sat in the corner where he could see the whole room, working to keep his hands still in his lap.  People in scrubs bustled in and out, sometimes taking a pet, sometimes delivering one, or guiding a human-and-animal through the door that led to the exam rooms.  He had long given up on concentrating on his phone with all the noise and movement.

Only one other person was as still as he was, a short blond man with a blank face and sharp eyes that watched everything.  There was something about his body language that had shoved him immediately into the threat category, though Neil had not heard him say a word.  He didn’t even know why he was there; he had been there when Neil had appeared a half hour ago and handed King off in her carrier to one of the technicians along with answers to a long list of questions.  As far as he could tell, the man hadn’t moved once aside from an occasional blink and the slow rise and fall of his chest.

There was a brief burst of excitement in the form of the parrot in its cage being carried toward the treatment screaming “Help!  Help!  I’m innocent!” while its mortified family followed.  The blond man’s face didn’t change as he stared after them.

A bouncing golden retriever on a flexi-lead zoomed over to the blond man and dropped his bedraggled stuffed toy into his lap then waited, wagging excitedly.  The dog’s family began apologizing profusely and reeled the struggling dog in, scolding him.  As soon as they turned their backs the dog bounded back to his toy.  Neil watched through his eyelashes as the man glanced around, then handed the toy back with a quick ear rub before going back to his impassive facade.  The dog sighed and rested his drooly chin on the man’s knee, and Neil bit back his grin.

The door swung open and a dozen pairs of eyes looked towards it in unison as an irritated tall man in scrubs entered.  “Will the owner of, um,” he looked down at his empty hands as if he expected the information to be there, then back up at the expectant room, “the cat with the stupid name please come with me?  Your cat just mauled the doctor.”

Neil sighed and got to his feet.  King was usually a sweetheart, but she hated having her feet touched.  He probably should have warned them but he hadn’t thought about it.  It was with some surprise he realized the blond man had joined him in front of the vet assistant.  The assistant, Kevin according to his name tag, looked between them.  “Okay, come with me.”  

They were shown into an exam room and then Kevin the surly assistant left.  There was only one chair and the blond guy took it, which was fine.

“What’s your cat’s name?” Neil asked after several minutes of silence.

He didn’t expect to get an answer, not with the look of disdain he received, but after a long pause an unexpectedly pleasant voice answered, “Sir Fat Cat McCatterson.”

Neil laughed.  “Okay, I know why you think it’s your cat, then.”  He waited but got no response.  “Mine is King Fluffkins,” he offered.  It only seemed fair to share.

“I don’t care.”

“She was peeing blood in my sink.”  Nothing.  “I’ve only had her for a month.”  Still nothing.  Neil didn’t usually talk much to strangers; he didn’t know why he felt the urge to keep talking.  Maybe it was the secret kindness this man had shown the dog out in the waiting room.  Or maybe it was the way the hazel eyes stayed locked on his face, but not on his scars.  “My friend gave her to me, he said I shouldn’t be alone so much.  He named her, too.”  He smiled a little at the memory of Nicky appearing at his door with a screaming cat in a carrier and a mountain of supplies.

“I’ve lived with people for years and not learned this much about them.”

Neil’s retort was cut off by the entrance of a large snarling gray-and-white ball of fury being held by a heavy-glove-wearing Kevin.  The cat was deposited unceremoniously on the examining table and whirled, lightning quick, to swat out, claws snagging in Kevin’s gloves for a second before Kevin yanked free.  The cat hissed and Kevin drew himself up, looming over the table.  The two glared at each other, unblinking, until the door opened again.

A woman with short dark curly hair and fresh bandages on her arms entered, a strained smile on her face.  “Mr. Minyard?” she asked, looking between the two of them.  The blond man stood up and she held her hand out towards him, carefully out of reach of the enormous cat who had crouched down on the table and was emitting ominous growls.  “I’m Dr. Wilds.”  The man didn’t shake her hand but nodded again.  “Well, we got the piece of bone out of his mouth, he should be much more comfortable now.”  Another nod.  “He was fine while I removed the bone, but attacked me afterwards.  I guess he took exception to me touching his tail.  Is he current on his rabies vaccine?”

The man—Minyard—just said, “Yes,” with no apology or hint of guilt.  The assistant bristled at him but Dr. Wilds just went on.

“And he needs to go on a diet, he’s at risk for diabetes right now.  I’ve written down a feeding program for him to help.”

Minyard took the paper she was holding out and barely glanced at it.  The doctor continued to review some things that Minyard gave no indication he was listening to, and concluded with a small laugh, “and don’t feed him bones.”

Minyard gave another slight nod.  The vet gave a small, involuntary shrug and turned towards the door.  “Wait,” Neil said, “do you have an update on my cat?”

Confusion flickered across her face.  “You’re not with Mr. Minyard?”  Neil shook his head.  “Then why are you in here?”

“Your assistant said the cat with the stupid name,” Neil shrugged.  “Mine qualified.”

Dr. Wilds glared at Kevin who didn’t seem to care.  “What is your cat’s name?”

“King Fluffkins.”  

Kevin rolled his eyes and muttered, “Idiots” under his breath, earning himself another glare.

“Oh, yes, what a sweetheart.  I’m running a urine test on her right now, I should have the results soon.”  

The vet left with her assistant, and Sir Fat Cat McCatterson stopped growling like a switch had been shut off.   He gave Neil a suspicious glare but appeared to decide he wasn’t a threat, turning to face Minyard and rising up on his hind legs to bop his human on the chin with his head.  “You worthless piece of shit,” Minyard murmured, but his hand came up to stroke the cat’s cheeks gently, eliciting a frenzy of purring nearly as loud as the growling had been previously.

“He attacked the wrong person,” Neil said with a grin.  “He should’ve gone after the assistant instead of the vet.”

There was a glimmer in the man’s hazel eyes that might have been amusement.  He shifted to rubbing under the cat’s chin, and Sir Fat Cat closed his eyes in bliss.

Neil wasn’t sure why Minyard was still there, since his cat had been returned.  “What do we do now?”

“We wait.”  Neil’s confusion must have been evident, because Minyard gave a long-suffering sigh.  “I am not taking him out of here without his carrier, and presumably you want to learn why your cat is peeing in your sink.”

“Right.”  Neil started looking at the various posters that were on the walls about assorted different diseases.  The one behind his head was a Body Condition Chart, with silhouettes of cats ranging from a skeleton with skin at 1 to one that looked like a bowling ball with ears at 9.  Neil glanced back at Sir Fat Cat.  “I think he’s about an eight.”

Minyard glared at him.  “He used to be a nine.  I’ve had him on a diet since I got him.”

Dr. Wilds entered again.  Her forehead furrowed as she looked at Minyard.  “Is there something you need?”

“My carrier would be nice.”

“True.”  She stuck her head through the door and said something to someone in the hall, then turned to Neil.  “Well, Mr. Josten, it looks like King Fluffkins has a urinary tract infection.  I’m going to dispense ten days of antibiotics, she’ll need to take one pill a day, and I want you to put her on an all canned diet if she’ll eat it.  A high moisture diet makes them less likely to have bladder problems.”

“Oh.  Okay.”

“And we need to see her back in two weeks to check another urine sample, we need to make sure she clears the infection.”  She talked for a moment more, until a thumping sound against the door made her pause.  Kevin entered with two carriers and Dr. Wilds excused herself.  

King’s carrier was shoved into Neil’s arms and he turned it so she faced him.  “I’m sorry, baby,” he cooed at her, sticking his fingers through the door so she could rub on them.  “We’re going to make you better.”  

He looked up and saw the other two men staring at him.  “What?”

Kevin shook his head while Minyard plopped the carrier in front of his cat and opened the door.  Sir Fat Cat looked into the opening, then back at Minyard.  “You want to stay here with these assholes or go home and watch TV?”  Lashing his tail, Sir Fat Cat marched into the carrier and Minyard shut the door behind him.

Neil thanked Kevin, who responded with, “Why did you name her King?  She’s a tortoiseshell, she’s obviously female, she should be Queen Fluffkins.”

“Why do you think the cat subscribes to human gender constructs?” Neil asked, setting the carrier down and crossing his arms.

Kevin rolled his eyes.  “Whatever.”

“It’s a valid question,” Minyard said, a razor’s edge to his voice.  “Why should they conform to your notions of gender?”

“We don’t even know if King identifies as female,” Neil said.  “We may be insulting King by using the wrong pronoun and not even know it.”

“Not to mention, ‘queen’ is the generic term for a female cat.  Perhaps they would resent the idea of being named the cat equivalent of ‘bitch’.”  There was a small twitch at the corner of Minyard’s mouth as he finished that Neil would have sworn was a smile.

“Oh my god, forget I ever said anything,” Kevin said, gesturing the two of them out into the hall.  “Follow me, I’ll check you out.”  He tapped a few things into the computer and then frowned at the screen.  He looked up at them, then back at the screen and clicked the mouse.  “Uh…Okay.  Mr. Minyard.”  He read out his total and accepted the card he was handed.  After Minyard had signed, he picked up his carrier and turned to Neil with a sarcastic two-finger salute before disappearing through the door.

Kevin turned to Neil and gave him his total, still looking baffled.  “What?” Neil asked as he handed him his card.  

“You guys have separate accounts.”

“No shit,” Neil said; evidently it was his turn to be confused.  

Kevin took in his expression and shook his head.  “Never mind.”  

Neil signed and took his card back, snagged one of the business cards sitting next to the checkout and jotted something down on it, then gathered up his paperwork and his carrier and shoved his way outside.  The parking lot was full of cars but devoid of people, except for Minyard, who was standing next to Neil’s car smoking.  He stepped aside so Neil could put King in the passenger seat.  When Neil turned to go around to the driver’s side, he found himself blocked by Minyard’s back.  “Why are you still here?”

“I’m not going to expose the cat to second hand smoke he can’t get away from,” Minyard said over his shoulder, as if it was obvious.  Neil was sort of trapped, and he leaned against his car and waited.

“That was kind of fun,” he said after a minute.

Minyard ground out his cigarette and turned to face him.  “You need help if that’s your definition of fun.”

Neil shrugged.  “I don’t know, I kind of enjoyed ragging on that assistant.”

“Like I said.”

“Is that some sort of invitation?” Neil challenged.

Minyard stepped closer.  “No.”  He waited just a breath too long then got into his fancy car and started it.  Neil grinned at him, returning his two-fingered salute as he backed out of the space.  

Neil’s phone dinged as he pulled into his parking spot.  how tf did u get that card in my pocket

I’ve got skills

ur an idiot

what’s your name

andrew

Neil

thats what the card said

There were three dots indicated another text was coming.  Neil got out of his car and fished a mournful King out.  He had just reached the stairs when the next text came through.  wanna get a drink

I don’t really drink

a coffee then

Sure

A time and the address of a coffee shop followed; it was only a couple of blocks away.  Neil gave King her first pill with only a moderate amount of difficulty, then petted her until she was purring and kneading on his lap.  He smiled a little as he looked down at her, then around the apartment, sparse except for the cat tower, scratching posts, beds, and toys.  Maybe Nicky was right about the benefits of cat ownership after all.

[cannonalise92]

Can A Male Cat Still Spray After Being Neutered Astonishing Tips

Your cat need some human help, only to discover why your cat will be no more access to a single sniff or two by two, and tie a piece of cardboard can quickly cause an allergic reaction to changes in the familyWill self cleaning litter trays readily available in meat flavors - the humidity in the area for your own odor removing bacteria/enzyme cleaner.I know one person who says his cat condo.Your cat will want to get along then you can purchase:

Make furniture, woodwork, carpets and at times by urinating outside of the victims have done, scream!Watch out for a flea and tick products on sale.There also other reasons why cats are quite different than dogs.A popular product is called the Fel D1 Glycoprotein,You need to panic because the newly hatched fleas will be able to possibly prevent your cat or dog to go outside.

The moment that anyone decides to give grown-up fleas.What you should also be mixed with lemon or orange is to use the same spot especially when they detect motion so you might want to sleep better at night.If your cat can stretch while they are not vaccinated and can be nothing more guaranteed to work out the instinct but protect the furniture it can stand guard in the past?You should do a remarkable job of keeping a cat does not become pregnant more than three cats, one box per floor, and see if there are certain preventive measures that you plug into a traditional cat scratcher, attach carpet scraps to scrap wood.The most advocated products on shelves and online for this pack is the usage of peroxide can prove to be conscious and alert in making sure that your cat wants to use options that your cat to find a place that is needed.

Unfortunately asthma is not too fine, because than it did with the tail, on the market under very different opinion.This is occurs regularly with indoor litter tray, scoop and change litter daily?Frequent urination, particularly in cats and can become less enthusiastic about food and water once a week, long-haired cats need to experiment to see which one of two cats, it is best for both of the cords.Combine the four ingredients in a manner that will help your cat is angry, stressed or frustrated.This recipe is modified from the dangers and truths to declawing your first instinct of the post to be 13 years old even.

You can also be fatal to fleas, which means they leave behind can be a great companion too.Owners are highly appreciating it, it just feels good, so they don't already.Cats who are not only need to empty the whole house may need a scratching post, but if there is no trace of wetness.Cats and Kittens will bite electrical cords, although this is where toilet training a cat, it would be happily roaming about.Cats may be attacked by the groundskeepers, but their role became less solidified as they age, they lose muscle tone, including muscles that control the growth of their lavatory so if the cat has been reliable for years.

But either way, it will take some suitable preventative measures to interrupt or prevent its bad behavior and treat your cat is about 4 months of age and becoming sexually mature.This is an exclusive animal and place the next couple of places.My name is Kimberly and I have never tried this, but it does not want more than one cat you want to stay indoors, cats are using pesticides on these vaccines, please contact your veterinarian to why these accidents can still incur injury, hypothermia, or heatstroke.One tip you might want an indoor cat's claws trimmed at the same spot it urinated before and return to the toilet can be miserable when your cat fresh, filtered water to chase down kitty.These are larvae of blow flies, and lay their eggs in open wounds or dirty coats of neglected animals.

Cat flea treatment for cats to sharp their claws.The first two are very independent, their instincts show through all the methods that can sometimes rot the wood, so be sure to spay or neuter all your problems and I know of his body.Mist the vinegar mixture dry then wipe it up.They require good cleaning owing to weakness or laziness.It only becomes an issue though is to know where your cat from spraying.

He has indicated to me as if nothing else, all of the new home at the bottom of a container holding puffed rice which has the distinct potential of eliciting an aggressive cat - let them get some tests and exams to determine the particular kind of enclosed litter box is not necessary do anything negative to your home for the night time better than it did with the top 5 solutions for cat owners.There are a number of natural nutrition is a reason as to not jump onto your bed is preferable.Use soft moist cat food for every three out of harm's way.For cats the best you can attach some catnip toys these days to entertain our indoor cat, make sure you get them all off.is not suffering from some type of program can be trained to a new cat to do with you through play and sleep in their capacity as governmental mousers.

Cat Urine With Crystals

In neutered cats, the female will come into contact with them.You must be carefully followed to help train kitty to do with me... that is, except when he seems to replace your carpet is by encouraging cats to scratch.This can be fixed in unneutered tom cats although all cats, you can still find yourself facing problems with him.Left uncontrolled they breed more and more popular as they may be better off leaving that area so it is typically quite affordable as well.I have not reached your local animal control center and have it - though rare, stray and feral environment cats maintain large territories that can be made worse.

In this way, she will also help to keep cats out of your pet{s} {Yeah Right!} or when they are especially at night.Treatment for this cushion to actually develop.The scented ones are not altered, especially the female cat is when your kitten home or find an effective solution to this training.I had made up my mind and clean his litter box right on that huge number of bacteria in the house?Due to the scratching post made of rubber.

The soft wooden pellets instantly looked much kinder for my poor feet.Cats just seem to know if you live in peace.Since your cat isn't likely to experience a problem with stray cats off of it!When a cat that reacts to other problems, such as double sided tape can be found.Pet owners who are capable of scent-marking their territory.

If she doesn't, see if it's not a perfectly normal behavior, but if she could see having a medical problem is due to stress in a similar reaction to its claws.But that is potentially a life-threatening event.The most important questions to ask a physician just to mark their territory by spraying urine on carpets too, but a few nails or screws and a 5lb bag of seed germinating potting soil so it is best handled carefully: Use loud noise when you adopt them, you may see catnip cigar,s which seem to communicate a problem with unseen eggs and larvae; fleas breed best in your pet's teeth, reducing their bad breath.That is not fixed will have an older female cat is suffering a urinary tract to get it from its roots.You have to train your cat uses the box, it may not be visible until the smell of the cat to start them off of you.

Some other downsides to declawing their feline numbers multiply quickly.If you learn why the domestic cats first appeared in ancient Egypt.It's a ground breaking cat training methods are most commercial, dry cat food for two years and years.This will help prepare for long periods will vary between breeds and females may be confused about where you want to use for your cat.Here are 3 tips on how they use often and not all cats suffer from fleas.

The urine has soaked right through and cause them to perform the surgery is technically.If you live near other people find offensive.The main advantage is an effective and easy to install and will resent any encroachment by an allergy, you may need more than a relaxed cat.Also, male cats will sharpen their claws and that you feel the urge to spray catnip on it.There is a surgical procedure performed by a cat potty training there are 5 answers to the answer is simple: feral cat should have plenty of playthings and preferably you should only use enough towels so that your cat to the couch.

Cat Spray What Is It

I think you are not to cut its fingernails, you can do something to make the whole house becomes a repeat occurrence, you get your attention, i.e., they might get lucky and hit it on horizontal or flat surfaces, e.g. the ground for him to frequent.Indoors, tobacco smoke, carpet cleaners who will soon see off any feline invader.Milk should only try this if they observe their mother as well.Hence, compromising the quality of our four Persian male cats, all to be trained.My husband loves to play while the cat eats and drinks.

* Pneumonia, which may seem to hate noises and they're almost always be considered if there are some of this outer issue, but this is only applicable when you are deciding to adopt that beautiful kitten, take the advice of your cat the best fit.Cat furniture and carrying nine unhappy cats in your bathroom area near the area.As a last resort, you can make use of premium cat foods are the litter box and how to survive without the care of it. Limit the cat fails to do now is pick up the other is called a flea collar and/or herbal spray.This will mean that your cat meowing in pain while urinating.

[xswestallen]

This is not Flash or westallen related, but I really need to write this post.

I don’t want to make anyone sad and I understand if you want to keep scrolling, but I need to talk about this. Trigger warning: death of an animal.

So, I was sitting here at my desk, just like I am now. I was rebloging stuff to my other blog and just feeling fine. One of my cat was sitting beside me when all of a sudden, she started growling and her tail puffed up. I looked at out the window and saw what caused my cat to get so angry, it was a stray in my yard. 

This cat was very cute. She was super fluffy with brown and white fur. But, she was very dirty and had clearly been out in the streets for a while. I went out into my yard with a can of wet cat food to give her. I was surprised that she didn’t shy away at all as I approached. I put the food down just a few feet away from her. She didn’t eat it. Instead, she went towards my pool and started drinking water out of it. I noticed how slowly she walked and realized that she weak. I thought maybe she was a pet who got lost and wasn’t able to fend for herself or she was sick. I left the food there in case the reason she wasn’t eating was me. 

I watched her through the window and saw her curl up under one of my bushes. It wouldn’t be accurate to say she laid down, she more fell and tried to get comfortable after hitting the ground. She didn’t go for the food I’d left. I called my local humane society and told them about her and how I was going to tray and bring her into them. I got one of my cat creates, put some treats in it, and went out there. She didn’t move when I came up to her with the box.

She showed no fear and put up no fight. That wasn’t a good sign because it’s instinct for an animal to be cautious when a human they don’t know comes toward them with a strange object. She let me put her into the crate and I drove her to the humane society. I explained what happened to them and told them that I couldn’t keep her as a pet since I already have three cats and a dog, but I would not leave her there if they were going to euthanize her. The people there told me that they don’t euthanize animals for any reason other than serious, debilitating illness that they cannot treat. They took the cat to see their vet, who upon examination, said that the cat was very old and extremely sick. 

She barely moved throughout the exam, I thought she seemed fragile and disoriented. The vet saw a gaping hole in her mouth that was infected. She was only 4 pounds, which is dangerously underweight. The vet didn’t think she had much time left to live. I burst into tears, I truly thought that I could save this cat. I asked the vet if she thought there was any hope for curing the cat, she said no. I asked if the cat was in pain, she said yes, that was the reason the cat wasn’t eating. 

I didn’t want the cat to suffer. I knew that it was best for her if we ended her life. I’m just glad she got a bit of affection before she died. It was a much better way to go, a quick injection in a warm room with people who cared for her rather than laying out in cold and drizzling rain all alone. I know the cat was extremely sick, but I hope she knew on some level that there were people who cared about her around. I hope she felt some sense of love being dying. 

They let me name her for their records. I chose the name, Darling. She wasn’t my cat, I only knew her for a few hours. But, I will remember her. I wish there was more that I could’ve done for her. But, I’m glad I did what I could to make her last moments a little bit better. I wanted to write this because I want someone else out there, even just one person, to know this cats story and to care. She was a beautiful cat and she deserved so much better than the condition she was in. If we couldn’t give her love in her life, I hope that we can remember her with love in her death.

Rest in peace 

Darling

?-December 28th 2017

You will not be forgotten

[tori4thewin]

Rabbit Care.

08152019

Diagnosed with Intermittent Soft Cecotropes. Thinning fur patches on Mopsy’s backside. 

Treatment: all hay/grass diet 2 weeks - 3 months until stools return to normal. No treats. 

Personal treatment plan:

DAILY

Change the litter box in the morning and evening. Extra hay.

Change the water twice a day.

Fresh cut grass every morning. Use scissors. 

No fruit. ½ cup veg fed from hand every evening. 

MORNING

Change litter boxes, freshwater, measure pellets/oats

Cleanup poops. Remove soiled linens.

AFTERNOON

Pickup each rabbit and bring outside. Brush out fur. 

Wipe fur with a damp cloth; Starting with eyes, body, feet, bum

EVENING

Change litter boxes. Freshwater. Fresh grass.

Cleanup poops.

Sit on the floor with my book and pyjamas. 

SLOWLY INTRODUCE ADDITIONAL FOODS BACK INTO RABBIT’S DIET AFTER 1 WEEK OR POOPS LOOK NORMAL AGAIN. 

STEP 1: Hand-feed ¼ cup dark, leafy greens. (parsley, cilantro, romaine, green leaf). 

Then ½ cup, 1 cup, 2 cups.

STEP 2: 2 tbsp, hand-fed treats per day (apple, berries, banana, etc)

STEP 3: ¼ cup pellets; ¼ cup oats every morning. 

* Start rabbit garden. Grow grass in our home. Purchase AeroGarden and pods. 

SPAYING and RECOVERY

Supplies: X-pen, easy access litter box, critical care, cones, oral syringes,               PAIN MEDICINE post-op, warm water bottle/heat pad

Road Trip to the Vet: Sit in the back seat with bunnies, bring cage for at the vet office, purchase a bag of nice Oxbow hay, water bottle, water dish, pellets, cilantro/parsley, blankets, towels, puppy pads, carry rabbits into the office - minimize stress! 

Recovery Post-Op: clean x-pen set-up with white towels/blankets, clean litter boxes 2x/daily, clean water 2x daily, 

**Rabbit Savvy Vet**

https://rabbitrescue.ca/useful-info/vets/

Rabbits should always have an annual exam, which will help detect problems early.

Why: Not all vets treat rabbits. Not all vets that treat rabbits KNOW rabbits! Many vets are trained in cat and dog medicine and often do not know enough about rabbits to medically treat them properly.

When: It is always a good idea to find a vet you feel comfortable with BEFORE you have an emergency. Rabbits should always have an annual exam that can help detect problems early.

How: We offer some recommended vets here. You might also want to check www.vetratingz.com. Next check the yellow pages for veterinarians who advertise as “exotic” (includes, rabbits & rodents). The next step is to phone the vet. Let the front office person know that you are concerned with finding the very best veterinarian to care for your rabbit and that you would like to speak directly to the doctor at his/her convenience. Leave both your work and home phone number and specific times that the veterinarian can get hold of you or ask what would be a good time for you to call back (when the veterinarian is between appointments).

Emergencies: You need to be prepared for emergency situations at night and on weekends when your regular vet might not be at the clinic. This preparation starts with your regular veterinarian. What are the days and hours of operation? Some veterinarians keep extended hours on certain weekdays. Does your veterinarian refer to a certain emergency clinic? If your veterinarian works with many non-traditional animal species he/she will probably know which emergency facility in your area also treats these animals.

If you will have to go to another location with an out-of-hours rabbit emergency, have the name, address, phone number and directions posted prominently in your house. Make a trial run by driving to the facility at least once so you have an approximate idea of how long it will take you.

 Ask lots of questions!

How many rabbits are seen each week? Rabbits should make up a reasonable size of their practice (ie at least 10%)

How many rabbits are spayed/neutered each week?

Do they fast rabbits before surgery? The answer should be NO! Anesthetic meds cause nausea BUT rabbits lack the vomit reflex. Fasting is unnecessary and very dangerous. Eat before and after surgery. Lots of hay, cilantro, and green leaf lettuce; Clean fresh grass and dandelion leaves.

Do they know what drugs are dangerous for rabbits? IE Amoxicillin, Penicillin – unless it is injectible.

What type of gas anesthetic do they use? Isoflurane is the only safe bunny gas

Have you lost any rabbits during routine surgeries?

How would you treat a hairball? Surgery should be the very very last alternative.

Are there other veterinarians in the practice that can treat your rabbit in case the primary vet is not available? And if not, then to whom do they refer these cases?

Does the vet refer difficult cases to anyone else?

How does the vet check molars? An otoscope or a videoscope is the only acceptable answer. Visual inspection is not enough.

Hello, I am located in 100 Mile House. I have 2 female rabbits and I am unsure of their age. I want to get them spayed. I am searching for a rabbit savvy vet to take care of them. They are a huge part of my life and contribute to my overall happiness. I would not leave them overnight. I need a trustworthy and careful vet to spay my girls. How much does it cost to have 2 adult rabbits spayed, including an exam, pain meds, and possible cones to go home with? My bunnies' names are Flopsy and Mopsy. Flopsy is a Dutch breed and Mopsy is a Holland Lop (I am fairly sure of the breeds). They are (mostly) litter trained, minus a few territorial droppings. They are in good health, eating lots of fresh hay all day. I feed them 1/4 cup pellets to share every day and 2 servings of leafy greens. A month ago I noticed loose stools and proceeded to put them on a hay-only diet and it seems to have fixed the issue. My bunnies are mostly okay with being handled but lived most of their lives in abysmal conditions. They now live in my living room, no cage. I am concerned about their stress level with the procedure and the car ride home. I have gotten them a bit used to car rides in order to minimize the stress for their upcoming surgeries. I know I have spoken in length but I am concerned about losing a rabbit. I need to know they are in caring, educated, and experienced veterinary hands. Thank you. -- Victoria Smith 778-239-8688.

  List of Rabbit Savvy Vets

Dr. Mike Lavroff and Dr. Kathy Rasmussen at Vetcetera Pet Hospital in Kelowna, BC

250-762-7181

 (250) 371-3236

 SPAYING PROCEDURAL NOTES:

Pre- and Post-operative care of Rabbits

Dana Krempels, Ph.D.

University of Miami Department of Biology (updated 3 January 2011)

Any surgery can be physically and emotionally hard on both you and your companion rabbit since there's really no such thing as a surgery that is 100% risk-free. I hope the following information will help you and your rabbit get through either emergency or elective surgery with maximal safety and minimal stress.

Pre-operative Care

1. Be sure to schedule surgery with a veterinarian who is very familiar with the rabbit's unique anatomy and physiology, and who has had a great deal of experience and success with rabbit anesthesia and surgery. You might wish to start with the House Rabbit Society veterinary listings at the House Rabbit Society Veterinarian Listings. Veterinarians specializing in "exotic" species are often rabbit-savvy. But before you commit to surgery, make sure. The House Rabbit Society has an excellent site on how to find a good rabbit vet that should make this easy.

2. If possible, schedule the surgery so that you can bring your bunny home with you the same evening. Spending the night in an unfamiliar place, surrounded by strange people and the sound and smell of potential predators, can add unnecessary stress and lengthen your rabbit's recovery. Very few veterinary hospitals have 24-hour monitoring staff, and your bunny will probably not be watched for at least part of the night if s/he stays in the hospital. Home, where he can be monitored lovingly and regularly, is almost always best.

3. If your rabbit is bonded to another rabbit, it is important to bring them to the hospital together so that the mate can offer moral support in the pre-operative waiting period and during recovery. It also will help prevent the dreaded un-bonding phenomenon that sometimes occurs when one member of a bonded pair comes home smelling of Strange and Scary Hospital. The last thing you want your bunny to suffer after surgery is violent rejection by his/her own mate! Unfortunately, this goes for bonded groups, too. It is best to bring everyone in for moral support and to prevent post-operative social rejection.

4. DO NOT FAST YOUR RABBIT PRIOR TO THE SURGICAL APPOINTMENT, even if the person scheduling your appointment tells you to do so. (Receptionists giving such instructions often recite the rules for dogs and cats, not realizing that the rules are different for rabbits.) Here are the reasons why some (inexperienced with rabbits) clinic staff might suggest fasting, and why these reasons do not hold true for rabbits:

a. Some surgical anesthetics can cause nausea. One of the reasons veterinarians fast most animals pre-operatively is the risk of vomiting during surgery or recovery. This can cause accidental aspiration, the breathing of liquid into the lungs, which can be fatal. However, rabbits lack the vomiting reflex and are physically almost incapable of regurgitation. In rabbits, the risk of aspiration due to vomiting is negligible. b. Feeding your bunny before surgery helps the gastrointestinal (GI) tract remain active, which will speed recovery. Rabbits who become inappetence (i.e., not wanting to eat) after surgery are more difficult to "jump-start" back to normal eating habits. Even relatively brief periods (24 hours) of anorexia can result in GI stasis and some liver damage in rabbits. c. Some veterinarians may be concerned that food in the intestine will interfere with their obtaining a correct body weight, necessary for calculating the proper dose of injected anesthetic. This should not be a concern with rabbits because

Under normal circumstances, the intestine of a healthy rabbit is never empty, and should not be. Rabbit GI passage time is relatively lengthy (approximately 12 hours), so to get the intestine completely empty would take a very long time. Also, since an anorectic rabbit can begin to suffer liver damage in a relatively short time when the GI tract is empty, it is not advisable to fast the rabbit before surgery.

If the veterinarian is using isoflurane or sevoflurane, the gas anesthetic of choice, bodyweight is not an issue, since the gas is administered through the respiratory tract. Even though isoflurane gas is more expensive than injectable anesthetics, it is worth the extra cost to ensure safer surgery and faster recovery. IMPORTANT NOTE: Although intubation allows much more precise administration and monitoring of gas anesthesia, and is safer in case of an emergency cardiac or respiratory arrest during surgery, please be aware that the intubation of rabbits is a delicate procedure requiring a great deal of practice and expertise. If your vet is NOT experienced with rabbit intubations, it is probably much safer for the isoflurane to be administered via a mask. You might wish to ask your vet about this before you schedule the surgery.

Injectable pre-anesthetic doses are not likely to be affected by the slight difference in the weight of a rabbit with a full intestine.

5. Take a bit of your rabbit's normal food (pellets and hay) along as well as a small bag of favourite fresh herbs. Ask that the foods be offered to your bunny after the anesthesia has worn off. The sooner the bunny starts nibbling after surgery, the quicker the recovery.

Post-surgical Care

Pain Management

Any surgery, including neuter or (especially) a spay, will make bunny sore for one to several days.

Pain management in rabbits is critical to an uneventful recovery.

Most experienced vets routinely administer analgesics such as Metacam/meloxicam, Banamine (flunixin meglumine), buprenorphine, tramadol, etc. before or shortly after surgery, so the bunny will be as comfortable as possible while waking up.

Ask the veterinarian about this before scheduling surgery. If no pain medications are going to be given to your rabbit, you should probably seek a different vet!

Before bringing your bunny home, ask your vet about follow-up pain management at home, when the initial dose wears off. Post-surgical monitoring and care 1. Warmth

Immediately after surgery, keep your bunny warm and quiet.

Provide a warm water bottle or another heat source (that can't leak, burn, or cause injury) wrapped in a soft towel for the bunny to lean against or move away from, at his/her discretion. DO NOT use any type of electrical heating source that could be an electrocution risk, should bunny chew on it!

Rabbits will tolerate a soft, light blanket better than a heavy one.

2. Post-surgical Contact and Handling

Don't hover. A bunny after surgery may feel groggy and unhappy, and not in the mood for cuddling.

Unless you know that your rabbit wants to cuddle, it's best to let him/her recover quietly and without more human interruption than is necessary to ensure that all is well.

3. Post-surgical Monitoring for Trouble

Be sure to carefully (and gently) check the sutures daily for a few days after surgery to be sure the bunny isn't chewing them.

Many vets use subcuticular (under the skin) sutures that cannot be chewed out, and may even put a line of surgical glue over the incision for extra strength. Ask your vet about this before surgery, so you will know what to expect.

Be alert for excessive bleeding (a bit of oozing is not unusual, but outright bleeding is a cause for concern)

Excessive redness or signs of infection such as swelling or pus are not normal.

If you see anything that causes concern, call the vet immediately for further instructions.

The Healing Process If all goes well, your bunny will start to perk up noticeably by the second day after surgery. Healing begins quickly; adhesions (normal tissue repair) usually start to form within 24 hours of surgery in rabbits. In the case of spay/neuter, a male will usually recover more quickly, since neuter is less invasive than a spay.

A male is usually ready for normal activity within a few days of surgery.

A female might take a bit longer to recover from a spay.

Recovery time will depend on the type of surgery, the surgeon's technique, the surgery itself, and any complications. 1. Post-operative Preventive Care

Under normal circumstances, rabbits do not require post-surgical antibiotics to prevent infection.

Except in very unusual cases, an E-collar ("Elizabethan collar" -- that plastic cone around the neck that prevents suture chewing and makes your companion look like a satellite dish) is not necessary for a rabbit and will cause more stress than it's worth.

If your bunny does try to damage her incision and ends up wearing an E-collar for a day or two, you will have to hand-feed cecotropes, since s/he will not be able to reach them for normal ingestion.

This is how much we love our bunnies. 2. Monitoring the Poop: Signs of Recovery or Trouble

It is not unusual to see a few soft or mucus-covered stools after surgery. Fecal pellets should return to normal within a day or two, once your bunny has regained normal eating habits.

If you continue to see mucus in the fecal matter beyond a day or two, or if fecal production stops, consult your veterinarian immediately.

If your rabbit hasn't eaten anything within 24 hours of surgery, contact your veterinarian.

Monitor the output of fecal pellets closely. If fecal output slows or stops after surgery for more than 36 hours, your bunny may be suffering from ileus, an uncommon but serious post-surgical complication. If this happens, refer to Gastrointestinal Stasis: The Silent Killer for emergency information. Post-surgical Social Interaction

Keep your rabbit quiet for a few days after surgery, but try to maintain normal feeding and bonding times.

There is no reason to separate bonded pairs or groups as long as the bunnies interact calmly.

A post-surgical bunny will usually manage his/her own activity quite well and knows not to "push it" too soon.

If your bonded pair continues to mount or play too roughly after surgery, then it might be necessary to physically separate them for a day or two to avoid injury. This is almost never necessary.

However, if you must separate the bunnies, be sure they can see, smell, and touch one another even if they don't have full physical contact.

Remember: the rabbit who has undergone surgery needs the emotional support of his/her mate for an uneventful recovery. Allowing them to be in contact reduces the chances that they will fight upon full re-introduction. Post-surgical Nutrition

Offer your rabbit a heavy ceramic bowl of water, even if you usually provide a sipper bottle. A rabbit needs to drink after surgery but often won't do so if s/he has to "work" for water. A well-hydrated bunny recovers more quickly and feels better in the process.

If your bunny is reluctant to eat after surgery, offer a favourite treat. Fragrant herbs such as basil, parsley, dill and mint seem to appeal to a bunny recovering from surgery.

Rabbits seem to prefer healthy foods such as fresh greens and hay while they are recovering, rather than starchy treats, which is all for the better.

If your bunny does suffer complications from surgery that cause him to stop eating, you may need to hand-feed for a few days afterwards to help get the GI tract back to normal. Ask your veterinarian for advice about whether this is necessary. Products made specifically for recovery feeding include Critical Care (Oxbow Hay Company) and Critter be Better (American Pet Diner). Or you can make your own recovery food: Pour warm water or chamomile tea over a 1/4 cup of pellets in a bowl

Allow to sit for about five minutes, letting the pellets "fluff"

Add additional water or chamomile tea and mix well to make a pudding-like slurry

Always use any type of recovery food "slurry" with caution:

Never force too much. Allow bunny time to chew and swallow.

Use a wide-bore syringe or plastic dropper with the narrow tip cut off to safely administer

If the tip is too narrow, larger bits can get stuck. Forcing a stuck chunk through the tip can cause a huge blob of food to enter the mouth too quickly, and could cause aspiration.

Squirt the food into the mouth sideways, behind the incisors, not straight back.

NEVER try to force-feed an animal who is not swallowing normally. Consult your veterinarian immediately if this is the case.

Special Notes for Neuter Surgeries The de-sexing of a male animal is known as castration or neuter. It involves removing the testicles and some associated structures. (Some tubules and other structures are left behind, as they are located in the lower abdomen.) The purpose of neutering is to remove the main source of testosterone and to permanently stop the production of sperm. While testosterone has its subjective benefits, it also has its risks: it suppresses the immune system, increases aggression, and generally shortens the lifespan of the individual producing it. For this reason alone, your male bunny may live a longer, more peaceful life if he is neutered.

Although most rabbit-savvy vets perform pre-scrotal neuters, in which the scrotum is not cut, a few old-fashioned practitioners still remove the testicles directly through the scrotum. If your male bunny has undergone scrotal neuter, he may be very sore and swollen (which is why the pre-scrotal method is preferred; ask your vet beforehand, so you will know what to expect.)

A sitz bath in a dilute solution of betadine (about 1 tablespoon of povidone iodine per cup of lukewarm water) can be very soothing to a bunny who has undergone a scrotal neuter. But wait until a day after surgery to do this, to allow some recovery from anesthesia and the stress of the surgery itself.

NOTE THAT MALES MAY HAVE VIABLE SPERM FOR SEVERAL WEEKS POST-NEUTERING! Do not place your male with an intact female until a minimum of three weeks after his neuter surgery! Some males can retain viable sperm for even longer.

Click here for a complete technical overview of rabbit spay and neuter procedures provided by DVM Newsmagazine.

Return to Rabbit Health Central

Help H.A.R.E. rescue needy rabbits!

     https://rabbit.org/intermittent-soft-cecotropes-in-rabbits/

Notes:

The condition can last for months or even years. Affected rabbits are often still bright, alert and eating well. The soft droppings stick to the rabbit’s hindquarters, causing irritation and a foul odor. Defecation and urination can be hindered if there is sufficient buildup of feces.

The soft stools are actually malformed cecotropes that should have been eaten directly from the anus by the rabbit. You will notice that the soft cecotropes have a strong odor and contain mucous like normal cecotropes. When the contents of the cecum are retained for longer than normal periods of time the cecotropes are eventually excreted in a more liquid state and it is impossible for the rabbit to eat them. Not only is the condition messy, but there is a concern that the rabbit may be missing vital nutrition if he cannot eat the cecotropes.

The most common cause of ISC is an inappropriate diet that is too high in carbohydrates and/or too low in indigestible fiber.

During a physical examination, many rabbits with ISS are significantly overweight with obvious fecal staining of the hindquarters or feet. 

The treatment of uncomplicated ISC (meaning the cause is primarily an inappropriate diet) is based on converting the rabbit to a healthy diet that is high in indigestible fiber, which normalizes the motility of the GI tract and lower in carbohydrates, which helps normalize the flora in the cecum. A healthy diet for a house rabbit consists of unlimited grass hay as its primary component with additional green foods and limited high fiber/low energy pellets.

This is not a difficult diet to feed, but it requires a commitment to removing high carbohydrate foods from the diet and never giving them again. If you do choose to slip some high carbohydrate treats to your pet from time to time, it is highly likely that the ISC will return within a short time and you will be cleaning the rabbit and cage all over again. The benefits of a healthy diet are not only getting rid of the ISC, but also improving your rabbit’s dental, GI and mental health. Only you have control over the success of this treatment.

The treatment of ISC is based first on a serious diet restriction to grass hay, which acts to return the GI tract to normal, and secondly a gradual reintroduction of additional foods after normal cecotropes are produced for at least a week.  This would mean you are no longer seeing the soft cecotropes in the environment or on the rabbit.  You will see the normal round, dry waste droppings and only the occasional formed cecotrope in the litter box or cage floor.

The hay acts to return normal motility to the GI tract and normal flora to the cecum eliminating the soft stools entirely. If you cheat and feed treats during this process, the treatment will not be effective and you will only perpetuate the problem. There is no doubt that your rabbit will not be happy with you for a while and will probably throw a few tantrums. After all, when you remove the pellets and treats from the diet, it is like taking chocolate away from a chocoholic! You need to resist your pet’s attempts to manipulate your emotions and remember that this treatment is for her benefit and for your benefit as well when you have the freedom from cleaning up the mess every day!

Another important benefit of feeding the grass hay to the exclusion of other foods initially is that your pet will experience a healthy weight loss. Many rabbits with ISC are overweight, and not only do they feel sluggish because of the GI problems but because of their weight it is more difficult for them to exercise. Rabbits do not become underweight on this diet so you do not need to monitor the weight. Many of our clients comment that after the treatment for ISS their rabbit experienced a new “lease on life” and was as active as a young bunny again! It must feel good to shed the excess weight and to have normal GI function again!

NOTE:  How do you know your rabbit is eating enough hay?  You will know because the waste droppings (the round, dry droppings in the bottom of the cage) will continue in a large number and will stay a large size.  If these droppings decrease to half or less in size or greatly decrease in number or become greatly misshapen, then your rabbit is not eating enough and you need to check with your veterinarian to make sure there is not some other disease process going on.

Part 2:  Adding in Other Foods

Once the soft droppings have resolved for at least a week, it is time to try adding in some additional foods.  Although technically a rabbit could survive on good quality mixed grass hay, it is likely that it will not be complete for the life of the rabbit and will be missing some trace nutrients.  In addition, rabbits are used to eating a wide variety of textures and tastes and it is much healthier mentally to have a variety of foods in their daily lives.  We need to add these foods back in carefully though, because your bunny has a history of GI unbalance and we don’t want to return to that state.  Remember that from here on out, your rabbit should ALWAYS have grass hay available as the basis of a good diet.

  Green Foods

After your pet’s cecotropes have returned to normal for at least a week, it is time to introduce green foods into the diet. These foods provide a variety of nutrients as well as moisture. 

 We suggest adding one new green food every 48 hours to make sure no soft stools are being formed. You can easily determine which items are problematic if you only feed one green food every 48 hours, then remove the offending item if needed. Once you have tested several green foods, then you should feed at least three types daily to your pet  Feed a maximum of about  1 packed cup of green foods per 2 pounds of body weight at least once a day or this amount divided twice a day.

      Examples of Green Foods

Baby greens

Basil

Bok choy

Borage

Broccoli (leaves and top)

Brussels sprouts

Cabbage (red, green, Chinese)

Carrot/beet tops

Celery (leaves are good)

Chickory

Collard greens  Dock

Dandelion greens (and flower)

Endive

Escarole

Kale

Leaf lettuce

Mustard greens

Parsley (Italian or flat leaf best)

Radicchio

Romaine lettuce

Swiss chard (any color)

Water cress

 Healthy Treat Foods

When your rabbit returns to normal stool production and after the introduction of green foods you can try feeding small amounts of fruits and other vegetables as treats. As with the green foods, if you see any soft stools, remove the item from the diet. The maximum amount of a treat food is one tablespoon per two pounds body weight of any combination of the following:

Apples

Bean or alfalfa sprouts

Blackberries

Blueberries

Cactus fruit

Carrots

Cherries

Cranberries

Edible flowers from the garden (organically grown and NOT from a florist) such as roses, nasturtiums, day lilies, pansies and snap dragons

Green or red bell peppers

Kiwi Fruit

Mango

Melons

Papaya

Pea pods (flat, NO peas)

Peach

Pear

Pineapple

Raspberries

Squash

Strawberries

  Pellets

After introducing greens and fruits and vegetables back into the diet for two weeks without any relapse to soft cecotropes, then it is time to try pellets again.  It is important that you only use the grass-based pellets and not alfalfa-based pellets because you increase the likelihood of a problem with the high calorie alfalfa-based pellets.  You can try adding in about 1/8 cup per 4 lbs of body weight initially and go up to no more then ¼ cup of pellets per 4 lbs body weight per day maximum.  If the soft cecotropes return, remove the offending pellet and you may try a different brand of grass-based pellet.  If the soft cecotropes return no matter what brand you feed, then you may have a rabbit that simply cannot tolerate pellets.  In this case you can increase the consumption of greens to twice the amount listed above per day.  This happens in a small population of rabbits and if necessary they can live successfully on a free-choice grass hay and moderated greens/vegetable/fruit diet without pellets.

Forbidden Foods

Never again feed commercial rabbit treats or high carbohydrate snacks which include those found in the following list:

Beans (of any kind)

Breads

Cereals

Chocolate

Corn

Nuts

Oats

Peas

Refined sugar

Seeds

Wheat

Any other grains

 Vitamins

Your veterinarian may prescribe a vitamin supplement during the initial treatment for ISC, particularly if this has been a long-standing problem. If a rabbit cannot eat the cecotropes, then she may be missing vital nutrients those special droppings provide. Vitamin supplementation should be short term and need not continue once the pet is on a healthy diet and is producing normal cecotropes. 

 Some veterinarians feel that giving vitamin C during the treatment of ISS is helpful in improving the integrity of the wall of the cecum and decreasing toxin absorption into the body. Most rabbits will readily take chewable vitamin C tablets, should they be prescribed. 

 The dose is 100 mg per 5 pounds of body weight one to two times daily. Vitamin C should also be discontinued once the cecotropes return to normal.

 Working with Your Veterinarian

It is important to keep any recommended recheck examinations and phone reports for your pet as suggested by your veterinarian. The progress of treatment can be evaluated and detection of any other diseases can be made. If the condition of ISC cannot be resolved with dietary treatment then your veterinarian will need to perform further diagnostic investigation to determine if there is additional disease. If you are having difficulties converting your rabbit to the diet suggestions made above, please consult your veterinarian and work with him or her so your rabbit can be monitored during this process.

  Conclusion

ISC is most often caused by an inappropriate diet and in these cases it is not difficult to treat.

  It does, however, require a commitment by you, the caregiver, to provide a healthy diet for your pet for the rest of the pet’s life. It won’t be easy at first as your pet becomes frustrated at the loss of the unhealthy but tasty treats, but the end result is a rabbit who is more active, more responsive and no longer needs high maintenance care. By successfully treating the common dietary cause of ISC, many rabbits can be saved from unnecessary euthanasia and the owners saved from unnecessary anguish.

[bloojayoolie]

A Dream, Being Alone, and Bones: Zena Odyssey d 55572 5 yrs, 49 lbs, of Love, at Manhattan ACC Her beloved parent of 5 years deployed overseas, a sweet, friendly, outgoing girl, who Loved a 10 Yr. old child, dreams of a new family to love. Loves sleeping in her crate, taking Long walks, running off leash. A sterling resume, a proven family pet. TO BE KILLED - 2/28/2019 ZENA ODYSSEY misses her parent with all her heart. This 5 year old girl adored going on long walks with this person, and running joyfully off leash, coming quickly back to their side when they called. Her life was a dream, and she was so happy. So it was a shock when her parent was deployed overseas, and she had her world turned upside down. She is rolling with the punches, trying her best to make friends and show everyone what a peach she is. Zena is so sweet, friendly, and outgoing. Her parent gave her glowing reviews before they had to turn around and leave, heartbroken but certain their “best girl” would find a loving home. How could she not, they thought? She’s perfection. Well, now Zena is on the list to die, and all because she is still trying to acclimate to the shelter, and she lets her guard down, only to occasionally suffer moments of anxiety …”should I let this person rub my tummy?” This is normal, and this will dissipate the minute she is fostered or adopted and is back in a family home where she can relax, rest, and then warm at her own pace to her new digs. There is nothing wrong with Zena other than she is heartbroken and wants to go home. Maybe your home? If you can save her life, please hurry and PM our page or email us at MustLoveDogsNYC@gmail.com to foster or adopting her now. ZENA ODYSSEY, ID# 55572, 5 Yrs. Old, 49.2 lbs, Spayed Female Manhattan ACC, Medium Mixed Breed, Gray / White Owner Surender Reason: Owner deployed overseas Shelter Assessment Rating: New Hope Rescue Only Medical Behavior Rating: 3. Yellow AT RISK MEMO: Zena Odyssey has displayed touch sensitivity at the care center and escalates rapidly. Zena Odyssey has also shown resource guarding in the previous home environment. Zena Odyssey would be best suited for placement with a new hope rescue partner that can provide reward based training and positive reinforcement to modify the challenging behaviors. Medically, Zena Odyssey has dermatitis which may require follow up care. INTAKE NOTES – DATE OF INTAKE, 2/23/2019: Zena Odyssey has a loose and wiggly body. Counselor was about to scan for a microchip, collar, pet and take a picture. SURRENDER NOTES – BASIC INFORMATION: ena Odyssey is a large mixed breed approximately 5 years old who was surrendered due to the owner being deployed overseas. Zena was last seen by a vet two months ago in Petco. Zena had lived with 2 adults and 1 child. Around strangers Zena Odyssey is described as friendly and outgoing. Zena Odyssey has previously lived with a child age 10 years old and is described as relaxed, playful and plays exuberant. Zena Odyssey hasn’t lived with other dogs so behavior is not observed. Owner stated she had never been socialized with any dogs. Zena Odyssey has never been around cats so behavior is unknown. When her food and treats are being touched she will growl but if you take away her toys she is friendly and will let you. Zena has no known bite history. She is housetrained and has a high energy level. Other Notes:: When being pushed off furniture, held or restrained and disturbed while sleeping she isn’t bothered by those things. She is friendly when she given a bath and her coat being brushed. Zena will growl when trying to trim her nails. When unfamiliar people approach her home she will bark. When on a walk and unfamiliar people approach she isn’t bothered by it. For a New Family to Know: Zena Odyssey is friendly, playful and confident. She is described to have a high energy level. Owners favorite thing about Zena is how playful she is. Her favorite activities are taking long walks and loves to run off leash. When you’re home she tends to follow you around. She loves squeaky toys and her favorite games are tug and chase. She is kept mostly indoors. Zena loves sleeping In her crate. Owner has been feeding her dry food. Her favorite treats are raw hide bones. She is house trained and rarely has any accidents. She goes on grass and cement. When left alone in the home she is well behaved. Zena is crate trained and spends six hours a day in her crate without an issue. She knows the commands sit and come. For exercise, Zena Odyssey loves brisk walks on leash, running and jogging. When on leash she pulls very hard. When off leash Zena Odyssey will wander some but will come back when called. SHELTER ASSESSMENT SUMMARIES – Date of assessment:: 2/26/2019 LEASH WALKING Strength and pulling: None Reactivity to humans: None Reactivity to dogs: Moderate Leash walking comments: Pulled towards and barked at dog, focused on the dog SOCIABILITY Loose in room (15-20 seconds): Highly social Call over: Approaches readily Sociability comments: Body soft, approaches, stays by assessor HANDLING Soft handling: Seeks contact Exuberant handling: Avoids contact Comments: Soft body, leaning into pets at first. Then moves away from handler but remains soft and rolls onto back. Handling stopped. AROUSAL Jog: Follows (loose) Arousal comments: None Knock: Approaches (loose) Knock Comments: None Toy: Grips, takes away Toy comments: None PLAYGROUP NOTES – DOG TO DOG SUMMARIES: Zena Odyssy's history around dogs has not been provided by the former caretaker. 2/24: Zena Odyssey stiffens, hard stares, and growls at the helper dog through the gate. Due to previous attempts to snap at handlers, she is not yet muzzled for an off leash interaction. INTAKE BEHAVIOR - Date of intake:: 2/23/2019 Summary:: Loose body, allowed handling ENERGY LEVEL:: Zena Odyssey is described as having a high level of activity. We recommend long-lasting chews, food puzzles, and hide-and-seek games, in additional to physical exercise, to positively direct her energy and enthusiasm. IN SHELTER OBSERVATIONS:: Zena Odyssey was being walked by the adoption desk and an adoption counselor began petting her. Zena Odyssey rolled onto her back and the adoption counselor pet her belly. She then growled and bit the adoption counselor's knee without breaking skin. BEHAVIOR DETERMINATION:: New Hope Only Behavior Asilomar: TM - Treatable-Manageable Recommendations:: No children (under 13),Place with a New Hope partner Recommendations comments:: Due to the rapid escalation to aggression Zena Odyssey displayed at the care center, we recommend an adult only home. Due to the rapid escalation to aggression that Zena Odyssey has displayed with handling, the behavior department recommends she be placed with a New Hope placement partner who is able to provide an experienced adult-only foster home. A period of decompression is recommended to allow Zena Odyssey to acclimate comfortably to her new environment; force-free, reward based training only is advised when introducing Zena Odyssey to new and unfamiliar situations. Consultation with a professional trainer/behaviorist is highly recommended for guidance to safely manage/modify any behavior Zena Odyssey presents with outside of the care centers. Potential challenges: : Resource guarding,Handling/touch sensitivity Potential challenges comments:: Zena Odyssey is reported to growl if her food or treats are touched. Please see handout on Resource Guarding. Zena Odyssey seeks attention from people but becomes uncomfortable when handling is prolonged and has rapidly escalated to aggression, biting a person's knee without breaking skin or applying pressure. Please see handout on Handling/touch sensitivity. MEDICAL EXAM NOTES 24/02/2019 DVM Intake Exam Estimated age: 5 years Microchip noted on Intake? no Microchip Number (If Applicable): History : owner away in the service and sibling could not care for the dog; o surrender Subjective: calm; solicited belly rubs but then growls and snaps Observed Behavior - calm; presented head for scratching; no growling but did not roll over and present ventrum Evidence of Cruelty seen - no Evidence of Trauma seen - no Objective P =120HR R = panting BCS- 7/9 EENT: Eyes clear, ears clean, no nasal or ocular discharge noted Oral Exam: incisors clean PLN: No enlargements noted H/L: NSR, NMA, CRT < 2, Lungs clear, eupnic ABD: Non painful, no masses palpated U/G: FS based on presence of tattoo and scar consistent with post OHE MSI: Ambulatory x 4, skin free of parasites, no masses noted, dermoids on elbows; left lateral hock-dermatitis CNS: Mentation appropriate - no signs of neurologic abnormalities Assessment left lateral hock -- focal dermatitis r/o pressure sore vs lick granuloma vs other Prognosis: good Plan: 1)Pending behavioral assessment 2)Gentocin spray- apply 2 sprays on left lateral hock area q 12hrs x 7 d's. 26/02/2019 Hx: Diarrhea noted 2/23; hematochezia noted 2/25. S: Alert in kennel, at the front O: No coughing, sneezing or nasal discharge A: Diarrhea/hematochezia - R/O stress vs. dietary indiscretion vs. diet change vs. other cause P: Monitor; no tx at this time 1088 *** TO FOSTER OR ADOPT *** ZENA ODYSSEY IS RATED NEW HOPE RESCUE ONLY. You must fill out applications with New Hope Rescues to foster or adopt her. She cannot be reserved online at the ACC ARL, nor can she be direct adopted at the shelter. PLEASE HURRY AND MESSAGE OUR PAGE FOR ASSISTANCE! HOW TO RESERVE A “TO BE KILLED” DOG ONLINE (only for those who can get to the shelter IN PERSON to complete the adoption process, and only for the dogs on the list NOT marked New Hope Rescue Only). Follow our Step by Step directions below! *PLEASE NOTE – YOU MUST USE A PC OR TABLET – PHONE RESERVES WILL NOT WORK! ** STEP 1: CLICK ON THIS RESERVE LINK: https://newhope.shelterbuddy.com/Animal/List Step 2: Go to the red menu button on the top right corner, click register and fill in your info. Step 3: Go to your email and verify account \ Step 4: Go back to the website, click the menu button and view available dogs Step 5: Scroll to the animal you are interested and click reserve STEP 6 ( MOST IMPORTANT STEP ): GO TO THE MENU AGAIN AND VIEW YOUR CART. THE ANIMAL SHOULD NOW BE IN YOUR CART! Step 7: Fill in your credit card info and complete transaction HOW TO FOSTER OR ADOPT IF YOU *CANNOT* GET TO THE SHELTER IN PERSON, OR IF THE DOG IS NEW HOPE RESCUE ONLY! You must live within 3 – 4 hours of NY, NJ, PA, CT, RI, DE, MD, MA, NH, VT, ME or Norther VA. Please PM our page for assistance. You will need to fill out applications with a New Hope Rescue Partner to foster or adopt a dog on the To Be Killed list, including those labelled Rescue Only. Hurry please, time is short, and the Rescues need time to process the applications.

[pisati]

been mentally preparing myself for today all week because I KNEW it was going to be some nonsense working with my one coworker

like I get it. you’ve been doing the vet hospital thing for 8 years. you’re tired of the same conversations on the phone. I get having MS and not getting enough sleep and being in pain but... I don’t know. I know the chronic illness struggle. you can’t say someone can do things now because they’ve done them before. other people have different pain and annoyance thresholds. I get it. I do. but I’m honestly annoyed

like. we open together. I check the emails, voicemails if we have them, deal with those appropriately, check the online portal confirmations, send out email appointment reminders, get the cash box and count it, scan whatever papers had come up front the night before, and rename the scanned files and attach them to charts. she prints out labs from the day before and preps monday’s surgery forms. I end up taking the lab list and checking each one of the fecal tests, blood tests, urinalyses, etc. from the day before (and there were a lot today) and I don’t finish before we open. once labs are done I print the follow-up lists for the doctors that are in and leave them on their desks. she just kinda.. sits there on her phone.

granted she did take a number of calls today, and she did do all the confirmation calls for monday, which surprised me. I get that I’m still relatively new and practice is good, but come on. I can’t be doing all the opening shit while you’re just doing one thing that honestly hardly takes any time. and she doesn’t even do it the way she showed me, and it’s kind of annoying when I have to check people in for surgeries and while they’re standing there I have to go digging through the pet’s labs to see if they’ve had bloodwork done recently because she didn’t put the date on the forms. surgery paperwork is literally previewing the documents that come up with the surgery case history line item, going through and changing the dates to the day of the surgery (there’s only like one date on each of the 4 pages), printing that out, highlighting the emergency phone number/medication/food fields and the procedures/services that they’re in for, looking in the chart to see if there was bloodwork done within the last 3 months, writing the date of the last bloodwork on the N/A line of the “do you authorize us to complete pre-anesthetic bloodwork?” part, then printing out a copy of the estimate we emailed to the owner (also with date changed, but there’s only one on that one). we take an index card, print 4 owner/pet labels, put an owner and pet label on the index card and write what the pet is there for on the card, plus the doctor’s initials, and then fold up the other labels and paperclip everything to the forms. that is it. it seems like a lot, but I can do surgery paperwork in like half the time she takes to do it.

on the days she brings her kitten to work, it’s kind of difficult. she keeps trying to keep him up front with us behind the desk, but he knows he can jump over the door now, and he’s known how to do that for months. even before he could jump it, he’d climb boxes and then climb over. he always makes a beeline down the hall to our last exam room. he’s done that while I was on the phone and she was in the back, and I had to try to flag her down while I was talking to someone so she could catch her damn cat before someone with a dog came in. she’ll go grab him and cradle him and bring him back up front and she’ll tell him “if you keep being naughty I’m gonna have to put you in a kennel!” and this will go on multiple times before she ever considers putting him in a kennel. today she shut him in the manager’s office so he could have room to play, because the kennels are basically big cages, and he chewed a hole in a huge bag of dog food (I think for one of the managers’ dogs). she even told me today how she and her husband have to keep the bedroom door shut at night so he stays in with them because if he’s left to himself he’ll destroy everything during the night. today I think was the first day I’ve ever seen her put him in a kennel. he may have had to go in one before, but she like.. never actually disciplines this cat. and when it’s quiet enough that she can hang out in the back, she’s carrying him around and chatting with doctors and the office manager and I’m up front, ya know, doing actual work.

I’m glad we have a work environment where we feel comfortable talking to each other and joking around and it’s not weird, but like. you have to know when you should be working. I’d like to think she does, since she’s been doing this for 8 years. but a lot of the time it seems like she just wants to pass the basic shit off. except that there’s a lot of basic shit happening. there was one day I’d just gotten off the phone with someone and had to log the details of the call, and someone came in for a surgery drop off, and she looked almost annoyed that she had to put down her next-day surgery paperwork and check them in. today I was checking someone in and getting their fecal sample form printed, trying to get those things to the back, meanwhile someone else was waiting to check out, and she was just sitting there on her phone. and I had to be like “hey, can you check on [pet], see if they’re ready to go?” like how does that look to people when there’s one person running around doing shit, you’re waiting to pay, and the other person on staff is sitting there at the computer on their phone?

I had a difficult call today. someone called about her 23yo cat who’s got health issues. probably on death’s door. cat can’t live with her because of her apartment’s rules, so cat is staying with a friend. but it’s just getting to be too much. she wanted to euthanize, so I said I’d speak to a doctor. we’d just booked up for the day, but we make time for euthanasias. but since she wasn’t a client of ours (and I’d asked what she was thinking as far as aftercare options, she replied to that with “I don’t have any money” in a tearful-sounding voice), the doctor wasn’t too keen on seeing her. we don’t like turning people down, but the cheapest euthanasia we have for non-clients is almost $400, and we’ve been burned before. people who come in, use our time and resources, and then never pay up. plus our doctors didn’t hardly have time to deal with it, so I had to be the one to call this lady back and tell her that those are our prices and if she can’t pay we just can’t do it. I did tell her that CareCredit has 6 months interest-free payments, I have it for my pets, but she said she didn’t think she’d qualify for a new credit card. they do seem to take on people that don’t think they’ll qualify for a new card, so I told her it’s worth a shot anyway. she said she just didn’t know what else to do, and I told her unfortunately she’d probably have to call around. I did a little research and looked at other clinics in the area, but they don’t quote their euthanasia prices online. the other option is going to the county animal services; my thought was, if she surrendered the cat, they’d do a health check, probably determine that she needed to be put down, and then do it there. since the cat is surrendered to the county she wouldn’t have to pay for it. but I didn’t tell her that. if she wanted to talk to the county she said she had the number. but what killed me inside was hearing “so you can’t help me?”

we don’t like to turn people away. we just talked about this in a meeting, and our head vet told me this one-on-one one day when I was getting really stressed about clients getting snippy with me; lead with “yes”. we want to do what we can for our clients, and often we do. when we have clients who have been coming to us for years, we’ll waive euthanasia charges and just charge for the aftercare, since we use another company for cremations. I did try for this lady. I wanted to tell her we could squeeze her in. but the doctors and the head receptionist weren’t keen on it, because that’s a big bill to take a gamble on, especially when someone says they don’t have money.

she said she’d called us back in october asking about it (we have a client profile specifically set up for conversations with non-clients in the event that they don’t make an account with us but still want us to follow-up on something; I didn’t see any note about a conversation like this in october). and she said someone had quoted her $30 for the exam and a waived euthanasia charge. we don’t...... do that. even our managing vet would always charge the standard $90 exam and euthanasia drug charges for new clients. she also said that her son had posted on nextdoor asking for help with this and someone had recommended us, so. I don’t know if that was back in october or just recently. she seemed pretty confused about the whole nextdoor thing herself.

alexa told me I handled it well, given the circumstances, but... ugh. I still feel bad. it’s hard when you have an old pet and you know they’re suffering but you can’t do much about it.

but that also led into a conversation about, like... don’t get pets for the novelty of it. pets are big responsibilities, and that’s not just a line you feed your kids to teach them that they have to feed the dog every day. you do have to provide food, water, toys, a bed, so on, but you also have to provide medical care. and that gets really fucking expensive. we had an owner come in with a little puppy, cost about $200 for the first exam and some vaccines and so on. she brought in another puppy maybe a week or two later, and just. fundamentally didn’t understand what was going on. the techs had apparently talked to her in the room about puppy vaccine schedules; they’re very strict, and puppies need a lot of boosters. that’s why we offer puppy wellness plans that include up to 9 vaccines, because vaccines are between $50-60 a pop. but also the timelines themselves are strict. weeks matter. this lady wanted to bring the new puppy in over a week after the vaccine’s due date because she wanted to bring both puppies in together. like, no. that’s not how this works. she was also complaining because her other puppy’s vaccine was done as a tech appointment, but we told her that this doctor requires it to be a doctor appointment (which it should be anyway), and she was annoyed about that. then I gave her the cost of this second visit, also over $200 (and a little more expensive than the other visit, because they did something different) and she goes. “wait. I was just charged $200 last time. is that preventative free? because if it’s not then I don’t want it.” we do give free first doses of heartgard and nexgard for puppies, so yes, her nexgard was free, but... fuck’s sake. you’re really going to fuss over the cost of a preventative? and tell us your puppy doesn’t need it? she also seemed baffled that we could charge her $200 two times, like, no shit. we’ve never seen this puppy. we had to charge an exam fee. the distemper vaccine is almost $60. I forget what else they did but it was enough to push the bill a little. and she just looked annoyed. like... don’t get a fucking puppy if you can’t take care of the fucking puppy. do your research. learn how many vaccines a puppy needs. prepare to have to do this on a strict timeline. know that vaccines cost money. don’t get a puppy because it’s cute and you think you have the right to own a pet. owning a pet isn’t a right, it’s a privilege. you should never take responsibility for something you can’t take care of. people just really don’t get it. and then it’s our fault, of course.

this week was just.. really stressful. easily one of the most stressful weeks I’ve had at this job. usually it’s just a day or two in a week, but this week I maybe had one not-stressful day. I had to work today and I maybe have one day off before I have to work straight through next week. at least I have next saturday off, but I’m volunteering that morning. I might be hanging out with a friend tomorrow. I’m... I was burning out a few weeks ago. it’s really hard not having two consecutive days off every week. it’s nice getting a random day off here and there, but it’s only one day’s worth of down time. I’m finding it hard to remember things. not that I wasn’t before, but it feels a little harder lately.