#i wanted my periods to stop on t
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one more thing i'd like to add, as i experience this and even after years of research, didn't realize this could happen: testosterone can cause period-like cramping in some individuals, apparently especially those who generally have more severe periods. afaik nobody really knows why it happens, but it can happen.
https://www.folxhealth.com/library/does-testosterone-stop-periods
Testosterone HRT Overview, Guide & Information for All People Seeking It
Hello, we're a genderqueer person who's been taking testosterone HRT since 2015. I've also worked in a pharmacy and we've seen a lot of the roadblocks that comes with people trying to start HRT. Nobody really explains how difficult it can be, even when you get your prescription. Because testosterone is a controlled substance in many places, it creates hurdles. There can be a lot going on, and some folks become very disheartened if their T isn't covered by insurance. i get that. We wanted to create a relatively easy to digest and succinct post detailing some common hurdles people have to face on the doctor/prescriber and insurance level, as well as after getting their hormones. *please note that a lot of this information is United States centric as that's where i live, i can't give information for a country i've never lived in, unfortunately.*
The estrogen HRT version of this post is here!
Doctors, Insurance & Getting Your Prescription
If your primary care provider is already familiar and comfortable with prescribing HRT, you can go through them, find an informed consent clinic, or seek an endocrinologist or gender affirming care specialist. Planned Parenthood is a good option for many people. If you don't have insurance, check to see if your area offers medicaid or other low income insurance plans, T can get pricey in some areas, especially for topical. if you can't access insurance please look into services like GoodRx that offer coupons and discounted rates for prescriptions.
Here is a list of informed consent clinics in the US for HRT.
Your provider will ask you some questions about your experience with gender, any dysphoria, why you want to seek medical transition, if you'd like to seek surgeries, assess your mental health, and then screen you for potential health problems or roadblocks. Your liver enzymes will be screened, as will your hormone levels, blood pressure, and some other things. Make sure your doctor knows to note that you are a transgender patient so that your blood tests are not discarded because your gender says "F" instead of "M" on the paperwork.
In some areas it is required to seek treatment with a therapist who specializes in transgender care to make sure this avenue is right for you. Not everywhere requires this step.
Make sure you talk to whoever is prescribing the testosterone to you about insurance, and if they are aware that testosterone is a controlled substance. A controlled substance is a substance that has been restricted by your country's government or governing medical organization and has to be monitored carefully. You need what's called a "prior authorization" from your doctor in order to get your insurance to give you your hormones in most states. Talk to your doctor and pharmacy about prior authorizations for your testosterone and syringes if you need them.
Currently, the only forms of testosterone available for masculinizing HRT are testosterone cypionate (injectable), topical gel, and patches. Topical forms are usually applied daily, injections can be done once or twice a week, or even more or less frequently if a person needs it. There is no pill option available for masculinizing HRT currently.
Do NOT become disheartened if you do not see the effects you want to see right away. It can take several years for the full effects of certain aspects of medical transition to show themselves. Stay patient, talk with your provider, talk to other trans people!
Stay patient, Stay positive!
HRT and Administering Testosterone
When you get a prescription, how things go will depend on if you get your doses administered at the clinic, or if you choose to do them at home. If you are not comfortable self administering, ask if they will at the clinic. many places offer this service.
if you choose to administer at home, if you are using injectable T, note that pharmacies may give you the wrong gauges of needles because they don't often give out needles for HRT. You need two different sizes- a thicker, longer needle for drawing from the vial, as testosterone cypionate is thick. You will generally be given large 18g needle for drawing and a small 22 or 23g needle for injecting. Many people have preferences for different gauges so ymmv. Depending on if you are injecting intramuscularly or subcutaneously the gauge of the needle with vary. Sanitize your injection site and your hands, never using the same needle tips twice for any reason. Never use needles that have touched another surface, and get a sharps container.
Make sure you are injecting in different spots every time you inject. you do not want to inject into the same patches of skin every time, as this can cause tissue damage, tissue death (necrosis), and severe scarring after long periods of time of having to heal but being interrupted over and over again. inject into slightly different spots every time to make sure your skin and muscle tissue can heal.
Here is a guide on safely injecting your own testosterone, including steps on how to prepare your skin for the injection, hold the vial while drawing, change needles, and more.
Another guide for hormone injections.
Make sure to check with your provider to see what type of injection you are meant to do, many do intramuscular injections, but many opt for subcutaneous (just below the skin) injections because they are less painful and require less frequent injections.
If you receive topical testosterone like androgel or other alcohol based testosterone gels, make sure you read the informational packet that comes with it to ensure you are administering it in the correct areas- your exact formulation will need to be applied in a certain area, if you do not have the guide or packet that came with it, please read this page to figure out where you need to apply it. if your topical T isn't working you may be applying it in the wrong place.
When applying topical T, make sure you clean the skin before putting it on, and do not shower or go swimming for 2 - 5 hours after application. make sure you cover the skin with some kind of clothing. You want to make sure it doesn't rub off on other people, as other people can absorb it as well by touching you. Do not ever have someone else apply topical testosterone for you, even if they are also trans, as this can mess with their levels in a bad way.
After starting T you may have to adjust your dose over time to achieve desired effects. if so, you will start on a starter dose and then you can move up to higher doses as your body adjusts. This process is called titration.
No matter HOW tempting it is, NEVER TAKE MORE T THAN YOU ARE PRESCRIBED! It is processed through your liver, which can completely wreck it if you take more than it can handle. Slow and steady wins the race with HRT. If you take too much T at once, your body can also aromatize it, meaning your body will convert it and encourage the production of further estradiol, which will provide unwanted effects. Do not increase your dose without your doctor's advice or knowledge, and do not go any faster than advised.
Effects of Testosterone HRT
Growth and thickening of facial and body hair begins 3 - 6 months after treatment starts and the full effect happens within 3 - 5 years.
Menstruation (periods) stop. This occurs around 2 - 6 months within starting treatment, and is one of the most desired effects.
Voice deepens. The vocal cords thicken, which can cause uncomfortable sensations in the throat for a time, such as a scratchy feeling, dryness, tightness, pressure, and a 'sore' throat that isn't sore in an illness related way. This begins 3 - 6 months after treatment starts, and the full effect happens in 1 - 2 years.
Body fat redistribution begins 3 - 6 months after treatment starts and the full effect happens within 3 - 5 years.
Growth or enlargement of Adam's apple.
Clitoris grows larger, and vaginal lining can thin and become drier. Some experience vaginal atrophy and/or painful levels of dryness, while some maintain a healthy level of vaginal fluids without problem. This begins 3 - 12 months after treatment starts, and the full effect is usually seen within 1 - 2 years, though some experience growth over a long period of time if their dose is low.
Change in body odor and increased sweating occurs within 1 - 3 months of starting treatment.
Muscle mass and strength increase, this will begin within 6 - 12 months and the full effect will be seen within 2 - 5 years.
Possible libido increase, though some report no changes or even the inverse.
Potential but not guaranteed balding or receding hairline, which is treatable, and not seen in everyone.
Potential increase in energy in general, some report an almost antidepressant like effect.
Possible increase in red blood cell production leading to high blood pressure, which is treatable via medications and donating red blood cells when appropriate and safe.
There is not really a guide book to masculinizing HRT and medical transition, most of the information there is is passed along between each of us. We will continue to edit this post as we think of more important information.
#reply;#this was the worst news of my life#i wanted my periods to stop on t#i'm taking birth control to stop them#but also i wanted t to help keep them gone#so maybe i could go off the bc if i wanted to later#and i haven't had a period in like a year or two LOL#but yeah this sucks
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I’m currently hyperfixated rereading Ftfo and can barely do any drawing but I’m trying!!! ‘^’ Designs are easier to draw for some reason so might see only those for a bit T-T
anyways have my version of Lord Lunar’s Gemini! They get fun new outfits!!!
#my artwork#fnaf#tsams#tsams au#tsams Lord lunar au#tsams castor#tsams pollux#tsams gemini#laes castor#laes pollux#laes gemini#the lunar and earth show#tlaes au#tlaes#little rant incoming#feel free to ignore#bro I’m recognizing the difference between a fun interest and a hyperfication and it’s not fun#I really wanna finish rereading ftfo but i keep having to force myself to be like ‘Take a break#go draw and such’ ect#because I’m just not moving for such long periods of time and I physically have to force my brain to stop skipping lines because I genuinely#can’t focus#and#if I stop for too long I’m so worried I’ll lose interest#want to finish ftfo but hyperfication is so bad#T-T#anyways#drink some fucking water#y’all#(don’t worry to much about me btw I’m doing okay and still taking care of myself just a lil frustrated)#(oh and ftfo is an undertale fanfic btw For the Forgotten Ones by I’m_Sorry_Buddy on Ao3 it’s freaking awesome)
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*gets period* *googles hysterectomy*
#I don’t think I actually want one after reading about them#But when I go on t if I can’t stop it I’ll have to get one because I can’t deal with this for the rest of my life#I do think it’s funny tho#I might get one in the future#ftm#transgender#tw periods
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I wish I could tell every young person with a uterus (especially with bad cramps and/or dysphoria and/or depression, etc) that there is a decent chance they just straight up don’t need to live with that. don’t let the stigma surrounding contraceptives and the expectation that you should just ride it out and suffer win. for the love of god if there’s a chance you can lighten or even stop your period and it’s symptoms all-together, unless there’s a legit health concern, your doctor should at least make you aware of that option. I want every young person to know that “birth control” is not just for birth control and it has the potential to make your life infinitely easier to live. do not give in to anti-pill propaganda im serious
#kibumblabs#I remember being in late high school and my doctor suggesting it because of how terrible my dysphoria/related depressive episodes related to#menstrual cycle shit is. and like. im not saying it was a flawless transition but good god im serious it changed my fucking life#not to the extent testosterone would but it was still like. a Big Deal#because I was like. what the fuck. I’ve been suffering through this shit for years. and no one told me this was a thing? we’re all just#expected to suffer? because it’s ‘Normal’????#this whole time I could just. turn the bleeding off. or at least Down. turn off the debilitating breast soreness and swelling. etc.#anyway im not sure why im thinking about this but#i guess every time i hear someone (without any known health issues that’d interfere) like ah time for my monthly Week Of Pain And Misery#i want to shake them by the shoulders like. YOU DONT NEED TO LIVE LIKE THIS. PLEASE I JUST WANT YOU TO BE AWARE OF THIS.#and yes i know it doesn’t work for everyone or sometimes there’s side effects that make it not worth it or what have you#but for a huge huge huge amount of people. they just don’t know it’s an option. because it’s labelled Birth Control. and because there’s#this long-standing quiet fear mongering about it that makes it seem more dangerous and sinister and promiscuous than it is#similar in a lot of ways to other stigmatized hormone treatments. like. well. you know#doesn’t help that when you first get your prescription it comes with the worlds biggest list of Potential Issues (most of which are either#minor temporary or unlikely)#grahhghhhhhhhhh anyway. on a seperate but related note shout out to my fellow tboys who either didn’t have their periods totally stop on t#or (like in my case) they came back after like Years for whatever reason and that had to be dealt with via supplementary contraceptives#cw menstruation
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I have Got to get more transgender
#100% секретный дневник левы НЕ ЧИТАЙ#transmasc#trans ftm#transgender#i like 2 say i'm very trans already but unforch i am Not Really. mostly boring ftm Guy Ever#so tempted to cut my hair again but my sense of what i look like is already so fuzzy i dont think it'd help..#want to dye my hair anyways. at this point i'd take whatever color i can get if not purple LOL#it's almost everything i could want and yet ... still me. still the same life. stuck.#soooo high functioning like you wouldnt believe EXCEPT istg i need an emotional support human who will guide me through tasks#such as 'pay with your Moneys Card at the Store'#or... idk that's it really. maybe go grocery shopping without feeling like i'm not meant to be there also#or like. exist in general maybe#reasons why not emotional support Animal: creature cannot understand capitalism. and also is not as necessary as a service dog specifically#idk! every time i come on here i fall apart (in text) and then pull myself back together for another day of ... this i guess.#i'm not even having like crying breakdowns or anything to go along with it i'm just held inside this shell of a body. typing away again#i'm soso tempted to make things worse. progress wouldn't matter anymore... at least maybe it would feel real that i'm like this#i wish my face fit on my body right. and also that i did not look quite so much like a vaguely gnc lesbian#like at LEAST let me look butch as hell but no. curse of sad hair & uncertainty#miss my little mullety thing from that brief period in october... miss my short hair from back in 2017 ...#just dont feel satisfied with what i am now. in general.#top surgery is literally Within my reach but i'm not sure about cost and i need to wait because of doing guard now......#my list of do i want t i kept for the past month turned out to be a bunch of maybes#partially cause i got sick. partially cause it stopped being shark week and i forgot about it#as always happens...#still unsure in my new(er) name. only heard it once#didn't feel the same way as with my old one? but idk. just don't know.#missing guard also but feeling conflicted about not having time for other hobbies...#since winter season is over i've had so much time to play guitar! that's insane! mostly cause i stopped playing for unrelated reasons...#just tired again. wonder if i need more sleep than what i always get. kind of restless.#there's nothing else to say i guess. just wish i could be a person the way everyone else seems to be.
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how it feels to randomly get rly overwhelmed and frustrated and bitchy and feel like youre going insane
#like its so dumb i shouldnt be this upset its not just rhe stupid drawing everything is literally wrong . i need everythinf 2 stop 4ever#i want to eat something savory but i cant bc rly what i want is a spambowl but i cant fucking make spambowl bc everybody in the house will#lose their shit that i didnt offer to make any for them <- uncharitable. at most lamp would make a joke abt it. but i also just dont want to#cook. but nobody else can make spam bowls#well lamp can but they prefer when i make them. but we have 4 pieces of leftover spam i need to use up bc theyre jusr in a ziploc#and thats enough for A spambowl. but iii dont feel like it#it wouldnt even be that like. actually no incouldnt thered be too much rice#we only have boil in a bag rn. and 1 bag is for 2#so if i want spambowl id Have to share w lamp which i dont mind its easy 2 like. yk. 2 spambowl is what i usually make so i can do it pretty#easy. but im like om the verge of tears for no reason so i cant be in the kitchen#'for no reason' well my periods coming up inliterally got rhe notif for it. thats the reason#i need to get back on t i need to get a job i need to graduate. slamming my head into the wall#i feel like now its been too long since i worked and nobody will hire me . man#but i also like. idk i. id probably be better if i had a job bc id have to be but i feel like i cant keeo anything stable#i cant even keep my fucking sleep schedule steady i get it fixed for a week and then i fuck it up#im so tired i wish things were easy. whateber man . i think maybe i just need to sleep
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will get to all your lovely replies asap but for now let me get down the mood with my usual
fuck but i really do hate this month and everything it represents or better the fact that each single year it gets just more miserable
#i’m sorry fuck i wish i liked christmas i do#but i haven’t felt anything close to enjoyment of the period since what was it right ten exact years#every single fucking one of them it just got MORE fucking depressing#we dont talk about covid times because god i wish i could delete them from my existence#two years ago it was just depressing af#last year for a miracle it was halfway okay and hey managed to spend one with the grandmother for once#except she died three months later and this one it will be….. meh but the rest of the month has been a total nervewreck already#but of course EVERYWHERE around you is like JOYOUS TIME EVERYONE IS HAPPY SEASON OF MAGIC#as it is i’mma have to do half of the presents in january ffs#ah right forgot today was the anniversary of the other grandmother dying#and the entire first week is anniversary of 2020 nervous wreck of doom so hey that’s all fine#yeah that happened no i had no plans to mention it good luck to me wanting to move over that specific instance ig#i just wanna stop feeling stuck in being miserable until december 26th arrives and i can hope to get my shit under control the year after#yeah sorry for the pity party i’m just not feeling great whatsoever add feeling totally useless to the list and here we are#i’mma just go catch up on replies now just god now i feel like crap bc the moment i opened the app i just vomited out negativity g r e a t#personal for ts#janie rants
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about to be sooo nosy so. my apologies. but. morgan frost? girlfriend? do share (or don’t! again this is so nosy i’m sorry)
for legal purposes i can neither confirm nor deny anything about morgan and his girlfriend but afaik i think he’s single right now? at one point (within the past four years 😭) he did for sure have a girlfriend and that is the extent of my wag knowledge
#anon PLEASE i am the nosiest person in the world i understand i want to know everything. ever. however#because i have no evidence and don’t want to spread unfounded rumors i will state for the jury i am not a gossip blog#& anything i say should be taken with a grain of salt. or a vsco deep dive & also maybe a dig into the flyers media archives. wrt UNfounded#but i will gossip in your dms because it’s a vital method of communication and important for community building.#also i’m like 95% sure i just osmosed the fact that morgan and his girlfriend broke up sometime earlier in the hockey season from someone#else (probably flyerskay) and accepted it at face value like absolutely i’d trust kay with my life. she would never lie to me and therefore#i can’t be lying to you. i can’t remember morgan’s gf’s name tho but i can like. vividly remember her artsy possessive vsco photos 😭 help#that man posts more about tom petty than he does anyone else in his life besides joel so really how would we know if hes posted her less#the answer is we wouldn’t and i want to say her name is katie SO bad but i know that’s tyson’s gf it’s like. victoria or stacie or somethin#& i want to see if SHE deleted all her vsco pictures of him bc that’s how we’d know they broke up. frosty stop following so many girls#i want to try and find her and see (she’s a model and she was public and had her vsco linked so all of this is public info btw.)#ANON I LOVE YOU SO MUCH AND YOU HAVE NO IDEA OANDJRIWNDHOWHDB IT IS 1:38 AM AND I HAVE JUST MANAGED. OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD ANON HOLD ON#BUCKLE YOURSELF THE FUCK IN FOR AN ANSWER YOU DID NOT ASK FOR BECAUSE THIS IS A R I D E AND I NEED TO YELL ABOUT IT I CAN’T MY GOD I CANNOT#B R E A T H E i’m about to start crying again but the backstory is that. i have had a fic that i have been working on for literal years.#my version history says March 15 2021 and it started in my notes app about 3000 words before that and it’s based off of a tweet i thought#calla had quoted and just said ‘Joel’ about but in my notes i never#saved the actual tweet and many times throughout the years i have gone back and advanced searched every version of joel and joelle and bee#and behavior on calla’s blog that i could possibly think of and just assumed like. it must’ve gotten deleted or the account suspended and i#could never remember the wording well enough to just google it but believe me i tried and put in every variation. never found it in 4 years#i try periodically. fast forward to about twenty minutes ago i am looking through kay’s twitter and searching vsco because i SWEAR she has#the picture of frosty’s gf’s fingernail marks in the back of frosty’s shoulders i am talking about / I can’t find her vsco linked anywhere#but i’m like ok. search up a couple other things and think about who might have it and on a WHIM look up vsco in ash notthequiettype’s acct#no results okay whatever i think about what else could maybe pull it up for me so I have SOMETHING for you. I search frosty. I scroll. GUES#WHAT I FUCKING FIND FROM NOVEMBER 13TH 2020 it is THE FANTASTIC TWEET THAT SPAWNED 16K OF NOTES & FIC & A SPREADSHEET OF JOEL’S CLASSES#AND I NEVER WOULD’VE FOUND IT AGAIN IF NOT FOR THIS!!! LOSING IT!!! by it I mean my mind and my sleep schedule!!! it’s 2AM now good night!!#liv in the replies#morgan frost#philadephia flyers
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Someone needs to invent a hormonal system that doesn't suck absolute fucking ass
Not me I'm too busy figuring out how to make bees into endoparasites
#doc rambles#PLEASE i just want something easy that stops my periods forever#just like. a button i can press#5 years on t and im happy with my changes and i love my body but i hate doing the injections#so i try and go off for a while and get hit with the biggest depressive episode ive had since middleschool#*the last time i was on birth control to stop my nightmare periods*#blargggg#back on t it is cause this fucking sucks
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every other day i keep telling myself "i should get back to vnc! i miss noe" and then i dont
#snow speaks#you know the tragedy that is my stupid brain going'aha! we have reached where we wanted to be! now we will stop :)'#like ??? HELLO READ THE REST OF WHERE YOU WANTED TO BE???#the same thing happened when i was reading blue period and i got to the yotasuke arc and went OURGH. and decided to perish in flames instea#of reading.#anyways! noe.beautiful boy with a very pretty voice (i watched the dub his voice is v soothing to my brain lol)#... also didnt finish the dub! (got to ep 3 and went hmmm manga seems nice now. reads instead)#but yeah damn i wanted to read the chloe arc so bad but then i got midway and went ✌ and ran off to fe again weeheehee#maybe writing this ill read one chapter T - T im also just not good at getting into material thats still ongoing lolol#i dont like the idea of catching up and waiting bc ill forget about it lolol
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Oh no
Only now, that my stomach is hurting, I realise,, i forgot to take my tablets yesterday,,,
#to be fair. i didnt eat til like 1pm#cause i was asleep most of that time#um#please dont let me skipping the pill for one day will not be enough to make me get my period.... please...#usually its like. two in a row.#...really freaking thinking i should get the. iud?? or whatever#cause if the pill stops my periods.... maybe that will too#and i cant exactly forget somwthing if its in me....#cause like. if i forget to take my iron tablets or antidepressants for a couple days ill be fine#but#not that#and. i doubt itll be likely for doctors to agree to remove the uterus of a young 'woman'#i also think you have to be on hrt for that and. i have no interest in going on t#i dont want thicker hair or a deeper voice or anything like that#and im probablu too old now for it to make me taller. so#ignore me
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ENDOCRINOLOGIST CALLED I GOT AN APPOINTMENT IN NOVEMBER !!???
#:DDDDD#therapist also called today but i missed his call but i hope i'll get an appointment soon so I'll have my referral until then#omggggg. why is it all happening today i've barely had breakfast#(i was still chewing when i picked up the phone)#anywayyy weeeheheee yippiieee etc!!!!#i doubt that i even want to go on t so much but every time i get closer to it i feel sooo excited :DDD#and like if i end up not liking it i can just stop. but what if it's great omg i can't wait to get even hairier#and if my period stops that would be sooooo epic i think if i dont like t i will try to get other treatment to get rid of it#bcs i suspect periods and pms are pretty much the main source of my dysphoria it always gets soo bad around that time
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I used to rarely get any (noticeable) PMS symptoms and now I'm in my mid twenties and like a week before my period, I start just having suuuper low energy no matter how much sleep I get or how well I eat, my ADHD meds lose at least 50% of their effectiveness and worst of all, I randomly feel super nauseous and sometimes do actually throw up. I do not! Like this!
Today's my first day on my period and I'm in pain, but wow suddenly I have energy again? I am motivated to clean my room? My meds kicked in? Wtf
Anyway I refuse to do this for the next 20 or so years, so I should probably bite the bullet and get to a gynecologist and talk about birth control pills (and then potentially eventually implants and such). Though me being enby complicates that bc I absolutely do not want more estrogen in my body - there's options without it but... Yeah.
I don't actually have a gynecologist. I know I should have one, and get regular checkups even when I'm not having sex but like.... The combo of being ace and enby and uncomfortable with the idea of all that plus the adhd making making phone calls hard.... Yeah.
#period talk#gynecologist#fucking ugh#but yeah like. i can deal with the pain and the bleeding but the nausea fucks me up#adhd already makes eating regular meals hard#being nauseous? does not help!!!#and i am doing a lot of exercise. i have german cheerleading championships next week. i need to eat#so.....#can i yeet my uterus is that an option?#no I'm probably too young for them to let me do that#could also go on T that'll potentially stop my period at some point but eh idk#enby healthcare is so frustrating bc there's no info on it available and doctors don't know shit about it#like.... physcally the only changes I'd really want from T is my period stopping and some more muscles and... idj#idk maybe a deeper voice? does T even do that?#but other changes don't really sound that fun#like i don't really want a beard or whatever and i generally like my face shape? idk if I'd want it to change#like. I'd need a doctor i trust and who knows their shit to really talk this through#but germany.... like we're finally at the point where maybe if you say you're enby ppl might have heard of that before#anyway I'm gonna take an Ibuprofen and clean my room i guess
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The fact that your executive dysfunctuon gets worse and adhd meds work less on your period is seriously such a crime like im already miserable and now I'm in pain AND I don't have the energy to make myself food? And its a monthly occurance??? Absolutely terrible experience 0/10 completely unfair get me out of here
#i dont even necessarily want to transition at all but id take t just to get periods to stop like this is just unnecessary#im hungry but even the thought of making food is so exhaustjng 😭 this is so miserable#about to eat the ingredients for my salad separately#yrsa rambles
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Well, I made it through today without throwing up or my knees fucking up, so even tho I was half hour late to work I count that as a successful day tbh
#im so scared of all this depo stuff#im worried of taking it anyway cs what if it means the gic won't let me go on t#also if i stop it then my joints are gonna be fucked for like half the time or more#compared to atm it's been like two three days in this entire 2-and-a-bit month block including today#but if it is actually making me ill in other ways or if this horrifying thing is gonna keep happening#it's a fucking shitty decision to make#at least I'd. idfk. i just don't want to be in pain#i want to be able to move without hurting#but if that's not possible then it's not possible#maybe going on t would have a similar side effect - it's my hormones going up and down that send my joints so much like this#mum's the same she used to get bad one half the month#she has a worse baseline than me but doesn't go up and down as much as i do if you know what i mean#going on depo helped her but idk about it for me#oh fuck mobile i can't read my tags back#anyway im stressed#ive liked depo so far (less periods and less pain) but this like i said this morning im scared of#im v scared of getting checked but i know i have to#and im gonna stop typing and think about smth else before i can't stop crying
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I'm feeling better already today, but before I go to work in 5 hours I'll be taking my anxiety meds and my adhd meds just to hopefully make it through the day
#rice rambles#last night was genuinely the worst ive felt since my period stopped a year ago#PMDD fuckin sucks man#I'll probably have to go on birth control bc I don't want to up my T dose
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