#i want to thank you for my forget me nots and marigolds and all the things that don’t get old!!!!!!

[lycanship]

maslows hierarchy of farmer needs: listening to l.g. fuad with Shane

[genshin-scenarios]

what flowers they’d give their s/o

Summary: A raffle request from my Adopt a Wanderer preorders! They’re a mix of genshin and HSR, but I’m posting it here as Wanderer’s included! If you'd like to see more HSR content from me, feel free to drop a request at @tiramisu-rambles! 

Characters: Wanderer, Luocha, Jingyuan, Aventurine, Sunday

Content warnings: implications of character death in Luocha’s part.

Adopt a Wanderer: Digital Store

Red String of Fate Prompt List

Wanderer: Anemones

Sincerity, forsaken love, anticipation, protection from evil.

Just like the many versions of himself, anemones are windflowers with various meanings depending on their color. And despite the hurt Wanderer’s been through, his barriers are worn down by your honest intentions; your brightness, moments of quiet connection, and how you’re adored by many.

He’s glad the wind has brought him to you. These flowers may have a delicate appearance, but it’s obvious that neither of you are so fickle.

“They’re a protection from evil, apparently. Something about closing its petals when it rains.” 

“Really? In that case, I have a version of that already with you!”

It’s a bouquet made with multicolored hues, where he hands himself to you. A small thanks for acknowledging his past, and a few blooms that represent anticipation for the future.

It’s been a while since he’s been vulnerable enough to feel nervous about something. But it’s a more positive spin on the emotion, akin to excitement when he knows he’s going to see you — but Wanderer would rather choke than use a word so innocently childish to describe himself.

Due to its wild nature, anemones also symbolize relaxation and a reminder to enjoy the moment. To take in opportunities at the right time, as he’s learned from you.

Luocha: Marigolds

Resurrection, energy, good luck, warmth, prosperity, jealousy.

Luocha sees you in the warmth of the flowers, as powerful as the Sun despite your bubbly outlook. He sees the light, which makes him worry he might taint your smile with his true nature.

You thank him for the flowers, thinking of him as the miracle doctor that’s giving you a gift. He is, but he also hopes you don’t get closer without being aware of what he is.

Marigolds represent despaired love, although this is mostly on Luocha’s part as he constantly sidelines himself, making himself a ‘side character’ rather than a potential partner for you. But he’s too selfish to completely step out of your life, accepting your invitations to lunch and walks along the harbor. He says the world feels peaceful around you. It’s true.

These flowers are often associated with life and death. In this case, it’s Luocha’s silent promise to always protect you, even if you might not want it yourself. 

And if there comes a day where he has to pick between saving one or another… He’ll make sure you get out alive. Perhaps he’ll even save the bystanders around so you’ll keep calling him a wonderful doctor, before his powers fail to heal his own wounds.

Jingyuan: Forget Me Nots

Clinging to the past, faithfulness, remembrance, true love, fidelity.

‘I’ll keep you in my thoughts,’ they say. A warm sentiment from the General, and behind them the memories of all he’s gained and lost in the past.

Jingyuan is used to being alone. He’s a leader after all, who wears the air of one without a care in the world. He’s capable and busy, but what he says as a teasing remark contains words that can be read very differently.

‘Don’t forget me.’

Forget me nots also symbolize links to the past. For a long-life species, it’s easy to feel the days melt together, and beautiful sights aren’t as vivid anymore.

That’s why Jingyuan thanks you for letting him remember — remember what it’s like to be surprised again, to see the sky and find it breathtaking, along with your voice in the wind. He wants to remember all of this as long as he can, so he gives you these flowers on occasion to remind himself.

“Do you miss me that much, General?” 

“Of course. There isn’t enough time in the world to spend with you.”

He starts to appreciate his lifespan again, for having the chance to run into you along the way.

Aventurine: Daffodils 

Honesty, truth, forgiveness, appreciation. 

Despite the amount of lying and masks he wears, Aventurine knows there is truth in the anxiety he feels around you. The same feeling before a risky gamble, where he hopes his bluffs will deceive his opponent.

…He doesn’t know what he’d do if you ever looked at him with disappointment. If he somehow managed to fool you into expecting something he cannot give; heart ringing hollow, echoing deeper and deeper in resonance every time you interact.

Perhaps one day this hollow ringing will actually turn into a heartbeat, and he can finally face you as Kakavasha. (Put aside the fact that despite his persona, Aventurine is still facing the world with honesty in every act).

He also chooses Daffodils because, in his attempt at excusing these sentiments, he simply thinks of you as his source of honesty and truth. A Sun that the flowers lean toward, after blooming each spring despite the desolate, cutthroat winter.

‘Please forgive me. Please don’t look away.’

Daffodils also symbolize rebirth, new beginnings, and good luck. Perhaps you can draw this out of Aventurine, who’s been on guard against the world for as long as he can remember?

Be the sunlight that sifts through the window, greeting him every day; a good-luck charm he continues to believe in.

Sunday: Violets 

Peace, devotion, healing. 

You bring him peace. With every smile you direct at Sunday, he feels hope that the world around him can be rebuilt. ‘You heal me,’ the flowers say. And despite how candied flowers dry bitterly on the tongue…

‘After all this is over, I’ll devote myself to you.’

He can’t be sure if you believe him, but Sunday has long disposed of the idea of predicting you. ‘It makes you human’, his sister once said.

Violets are reminders of loyalty, thoughtfulness, and dependability. Sunday looks out for you at every corner, even if his presence isn’t tangible. He notices your little victories and joys, feeling his heart twinge from the distance. And when your days are bleak, just know there is another soul mourning with you, playing a song to soothe your sorrows.

He’s devoted to you long before the drama of politics are done. In a sense, one can almost say he’s too caring — from a glance it appears he’s not bothered with you, and watch for a minute longer, the small, irrelevant commands given to his subordinates ring clear with thoughts of you.

Sunday doesn’t put a spotlight on his love, yet showers it with the adoration of the moon. Quiet, graceful, and just a bit selfish.

[mareenavee]

OCs As Song Lyrics!

Hello. I love this. I was tagged by @thequeenofthewinter and @kookaburra1701

Tagging: @paraparadigm, @changelingsandothernonsense, @thana-topsy, @snippetsrus, @saltymaplesyrup, @orfeoarte, @rhiannon1199, @tallmatcha, @gilgamish, @archangelsunited, @inquisition-dragonborn, @elfinismsarts, @friend-of-giants, @miraakulous-cloud-district and whomsoever sees this that wants to do this game! Tag me, because I have actually tagged you. For reals. I want to see!

Rules, more or less, as I'm twisting them.

For your fic/current WIP, give us some lyrics that fit your OCS and NPCS-become-OCS perfectly. Do this for as many characters as you wish!

So. You want song lyrics for characters? I have them in spades. IN SPADES. I will give songs for just the character, not regarding any of their specific relationships. Below the cut for some beans in the jar that is The World on Our Shoulders!

Nyenna - Destroyer by Phantogram (Shinies for the corvids out there.)

Keep you here a while And if I'm never forgiven You can't say I didn't try I tried, I tried to save so many lives I guess my heart got carried away I guess the dark turned off the light Was there something that you wanted to say?

Teldryn - Easier to Run by Linkin Park (literally emo but can't catch me giving a shit lol)

Sometimes I remember the darkness of my past Bringing back these memories I wish I didn't have Sometimes I think of letting go and never looking back And never moving forward so there'd never be a past

Athis - Caught by Florence + The Machine (The exception to my statement it's not about relationships because this one was pretty defining in Athis's life in general.)

It's the hardest thing I've ever had to do To try and keep from calling you Well, can my dreams keep coming true? How can they? 'Cause when I sleep I never dream of you As if the dream of you, it sleeps too But it never slips away It just gains its strength and digs its hooks To drag me through the day

Varlais - L.G. FUAD by Motion City Soundtrack (Nope, can't catch me giving a shit about this rec either. It's too perfect lol.)

I'm a mess, I'm a wreck I am perfect, and I have learned to accept all my problems and short comings Because I am so visceral, yet deeply inept I want to thank you for being a part of my forget-me-nots and marigolds And all the things that don't get old Is it legal to do this? I surely don't know It's the only way I have learned to express myself around other peoples' descriptions of life I'm afraid I'm alone and entirely useless

[wellthebardsdead]

Kaidan: Hands and knees covered in dirt again aye Farkas? Been playing in the flower bed again?

Farkas: bite me Kaidan- *freezes seeing Marigold coming* … *hurries off and returns with a bouquet of Marigolds, lavender and forget me nots he’d arranged* Marie! Here, I grew these for you.

Marigold: *bright red* y-you? F-for me? I- *takes it and sniffs at it* m-my sense of smell isn’t good at all but I love these, I can actually smell them and they look l-lovely. Th-thank you Farkas.

Farkas: Don’t mention it, there’s plenty more where they came from t- Ow?! Kaidan?!

Kaidan: *suddenly drags him back into jorrvaskr* What the fock?! You know I’m trying to court them!!

Farkas: well you’re doing a shit job at it Welp! *pushes him away*

Kaidan: He’s not a one book person and I’ve got plenty more chapters to dig through yet so I know what he likes! *pushes him back*

Farkas: Maybe if you tried asking him you’d know!! *pushes him harder knocking him against the tables*

Kaidan: …

Farkas: …

*meanwhile outside*

Ysolda: oh they’re lovely, did he grow them himself?

Marigold: he did, I-I’ve never had anyone give me flowers before I don’t know what to do.

Ysolda: take him to dinner obvious-

Marigold: *quickly moves her out of the way as suddenly the doors to jorrvaskr bust open and Kaidan & Farkas tumble down the stairs beating the crap out of each other* WHAT THE FUCK?!

Vilkas & Skjor: *trying to separate them*

Skjor: LET GO KAIDAN!

Vilkas: BROTHER STOP THIS! *looks back at the mead hall* SOME HELP WOULD BE APPRECIATED!

Athis: *holding his bloodied nose* no thanks I already tried.

Marigold: *stomps his foot* KAIDAN!

Kaidan & Farkas: *still going at it*

Marigold: *hands Ysolda the flowers and braces himself* FUS-

Everyone else: *moves as far out of the way as they can*

Marigold: RO DAH!!!!!

Kaidan & Farkas: *both get blasted off each other by the dragonborns thuum and right into the stream surrounding the gildergleam*

Farkas: ughhh- *sits up rubbing his face*

Kaidan: *grunts getting up to his feet ready for round 2* You gob shi-

Marigold: Kaidan.

Kaidan: *turns around to see the high elf standing there looking pissed*

Farkas: *looks up to see his brother glaring down at him* He started it.

Vilkas: I don’t care who started it. *grabs him by his hair pulling him up to his feet* you made a fool of yourself and the companions. Go inside.

Farkas: … *huffs and limps back up the stairs*

Skjor: *watches him go before looking at kaidan* learn to control your jealousy and your anger while you’re at it. Pup. *walks off after Farkas*

Vilkas: *just looks at Kaidan and shakes his head before looking over at marigold then back at him* I won’t say anything. I think you’re in enough trouble as is… *walks after Skjor and his brother*

Kaidan: *watches them go before looking at Marigold* Marie I can explain I just-

Marigold: I don’t want to hear it kaidan… I’ll see you at home. Clean yourself up… *huffs and turns away walking off with ysolda*

Ysolda: *hands him back the flowers tucking one behind his ear while she’s at it* I’d always wondered what it’d be like having men fighting over me, but after witnessing that I never want to experience that myself.

Marigold: *sighs* gods I’m so embarrassed… *takes a flower putting it behind her ear as well*

Kaidan: *watches them leave* … fuck…

*The next morning*

Kaidan & Farkas: *both red black & purple all over, both pouting still*

Vilkas: You two are going to apologise to each other and if you wish to compete for his hand you’re going to do so as gentlemen. Not a couple untrained pups.

Kaidan: I’m not apologising for anything.

Farkas: neither am I…

Vilkas: *looks at Aela*

Aela: *pulls out a fungal pod and waves it at Kaidan* you sure about that?

Vilkas: *pulls out a tiny baby frostbite spider and holds it close to his brothers face* You reeeeally sure about that?

Kaidan & Farkas: IM SORRY! IM SORRY! IM SORRY!!!!

[greenticklerdreams]

11, 16, 18, 34!

11. Fill in the blank: Tickling and _ go best together.

Intimacy. Platonic, romantic, sexual, whichever way you feel it, it’s intimate.

16. What's one thing you are really good at? What's one thing you want to be really good at?

I think I’m a pretty good writer. I’ve been told it often enough that I should probably start believing the (kind) people who (I respect a lot and) have told me so. I’d really like to be good at… any other art form, really. I’ll say drawing, because I’m looking at all my beginner art supplies on the small desk over there and thinking I should really get back into it… 

18. What is an unpopular thing that you actually like?

Just any unpopular “thing?” Uhhh. It’s much more common for me to DISlike POPULAR things, haha. What’s unpopular in general? Pineapple on pizza? Drinking tap water? Japanese pop music, at least here in the States? 

34. Share a line of lyrics that you like.

You get the emo kid lyrics, sunny Sky.

“I want to thank you for being a part of my / Forget-me-nots and marigolds / And other things that don't get old”

[eroticfriendfictions]

20 Questions for Fic Writers Tag Game

Thanks for the tag @babsvibes!

How many works do you have on ao3? 25

What's your total word count? 88,955

What fandoms do you write for? Currently just The Big Bang Theory, but I've also posted fic for Bob's Burgers, Friends, and Codename: Kids Next Door

Top 5 fics by kudos: Romantic Love and Other Treatments for Jamais Vu Uncommon Examples of Interpersonal Synchrony Collaborative Methods for Hands-Free Stimulation Sleep Tight Advanced Reading for Individuals In Utero

Do you respond to comments? Yes, I usually do.

What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? I don't really write angst. I think the closest I got was Wake Up (from Forget-Me-Nots and Marigolds).

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Probably Romantic Love and Other Treatments for Jamais Vu.

Do you get hate on fics? I have before, but it's been a while.

Do you write smut? Of course. ;)

Do you write crossovers? Not really, but I want to write a Call Me Kat/Big Bang Theory crossover sometime as a sort of wrap-up since CMK got canceled. The only thing holding me back is I feel like I need to rewatch a bunch of episodes first to get it right.

Have you ever had a fic stolen? I don't think so?

Have you ever had a fic translated? No, but that would be cool! I'd give permission to anyone who wanted to.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yes! I wrote some stuff with Morda back in the day. I'd consider doing it again. I do currently work with a beta reader on my BBT fics if that sort of counts?

What's your all-time favorite ship? Shamy has a death grip on my heart right now.

What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will? Uncanny Valleys :(

What are your writing strengths? I've been told I'm good at dialogue and keeping everyone in-character.

What are your writing weaknesses? Plot. It's so much easier for me to write missing-scene type stuff or just a character's inner thoughts during canon events. Sort of going along with that, I'm awful at writing anything lengthy. I'll get to like 1000 words and be like 'okay yep I've said everything I wanted to say.'

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language? I don't think I ever really have? I feel like if I do it will end up being Klingon lol.

First fandom you wrote for? First ever? Recess. First that was published on a fic site? Codename: Kids Next Door.

Favorite fic you've ever written? Romantic Love and Other Treatments for Jamais Vu my beloved <3

[but-i-was-b4by]

I want to thank you for being a part of my the forget-me-nots and marigolds

And all the things that don't get old

Is it legal to do this? I surely don't know

It's the only way I have learned to express myself around other peoples' descriptions of life

I'm afraid I'm alone and entirely useless

[identityfought]

TAG DUMP 2/2. ty for being patient guys <3

[hanafubukki]

Jamil Viper’s Flower Bouquet Meaning

I love flower meanings and what they can mean as a whole

Which is not surprising given the name I chose for my blog lol 😂

But okay

Twst Bdays Flower Language Masterlist

When I saw this, early early in the morning

My freaking heart was so happy and filled with joy

A bday theme with bouquets and not only that but according to Yana each twst boy will get their own customized bouquets and I AM HERE FOR IT DAMN IT AKSNDJDKDJ

Like the individual meanings and the whole meaning in a bouquet? Omg I can’t wait until we get a clearer image of his card and the groovy please I want to seee

On a side note, god, lilia and malleus bouquets are going to make me feral. I went nuts over the flower in lilias groom card, his bouquet will make me nuts

I hope that the heartslabyul students all have a rose theme to their bouquets 💐

forget me nots for silver 😭😭😭 maybe??  

So each flower has a different meaning, and the meaning changes based on country/region too.

I’m not so well versed in jp meaning but can somewhat say general flower meanings

Colors are always a big part too in flower meaning so that had to be considered

Okay, some of the flowers I see so far:

(might be wrong because image blurry)

red sunflower: royalty, loyalty, positivity, strength

marigolds (there's many types, its kind of hard to know which one): Power, strength 

chrysanthemum: friendship, happiness, well-being

gerbera: move on, friendship, hope 

cala lily (thank you Chris): sign of devotion

aster: wisdom, faith

carnation (maybe?):  injustice, regret, symbol of love 

dahlias: betrayal, dishonesty, instability 

Combined, the overall meaning gives so much growth to Jamil.

[ducky-died-inside]

Angst ending to A Year of Love and Flowers

Summary: An angsty ending to A Year of Love and Flowers where you die before Camilo confesses.

Genre: Angst

Notes:

Warnings: MAJOR CHARACTER DEATH, Angsty, Hanahaki

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ You laughed at something Camilo said, your eyes glinting in the sun. He smiled smugly, proud that one of his bad jokes had finally gotten you to laugh.

"Finally! After all these years of being your amigo, I finally got you to laugh!" Camilo teased.

You just nodded, the word amigo piercing your heart. You felt something in your chest and started to cough. It started to get more violent and Camilo was getting worried.

"Are you alright, mi vida?"

It was times like these when you weren't sure if you guys were just friends or something more. You opened your hand that you had been coughing into, and saw a gardenia petal. The flower of a secret love. Your eyes widen but you try to quickly close your fist before Camilo can see it.

"Yeah, I'll be fine. Just got something stuck in my throat."

"No you won't. I saw that petal. Who is it?"

"Who is who?"

"The person you like. I need to help you find them so you can be cured."

"It's no one. He's too dense to notice me like that." You sigh and Camilo huffed.

"Come on. Don't sell yourself short. I'm sure he likes you just as much as you like him!"

"If only." You muttered under your breath. You thought about all the times that you had helped Camilo through breakups and break downs.

Flashback

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You rubbed Camilo's back as he sobbed on his bed.

"Why do girls keep dumping me? I'm a great guy!"

You just nodded and continued to soothe him. Camilo has had multiple girlfriends, but they always ended up dumping him for who knows why.

"At least I'll be here. Through everything you go through I'll be here for you."

"Thanks, mi amiga."

Amiga.

The word itself was just filled with venom. It was clear that was the only thing you would be to him. Just an amiga. Nothing more. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Time skip

You had had this disease for a while now, about three months. It was staved off by Camilo hanging out with you, making you feel loved by him. Whenever you would watch him leave, you'd sigh sadly, and end up coughing up entire gardenia flowers. It soon got to the point where you were bedridden, unable to do anything without fainting.

Camilo would still come and visit you while you were in bed, trying to figure out who it was. He never thought of the fact that it might be him, because he loves you, but didn't want to ruin your friendship. He started to recognize his feelings while he was taking care of you, keeping you from dying.

"I wish you knew." He expected you to respond, but when you didn't he immediately started jumping to conclusions. He looked over to see you sleeping peacefully. He smiled at you and squeezed your hand. It was unnaturally cold.

He quickly looked for a pulse and couldn't find one. He started to freak out and call for your mother. He tried again to find a pulse, but still nothing.

He looked at your face, your lips blue. Your chest was no longer rising and falling and Camilo was crying. Hard. He called out for your mother again, tears flooding his eyes. Your mom came into the room and saw Camilo by your lifeless body, and tears filled her eyes. You were dead. Her little girl was dead. She handed him a letter.

"She wanted you to have this if she, if she died." Your mom was stuttering over her words, crying over you.

Camilo stumbled out of the room to leave your mother to her mourning. As he walked down the stairs, he felt something grow in his chest. He started coughing and when he was done, small petals fell into his palm. They were from two different flowers. A flower of love and remembrence, and a flower of death and mourning. Forget-me-nots, and Marigolds.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Camilo rushed home as fast as he could. He ran upstairs, ignoring his mom and sister. He burst into his room, curled up on his bed and cried. He cried and cried until he could cry no more, shape-shifting and occasionally coughing out more petals. He opened the letter and began to read.

Dear Camilo,

If you're reading this, it means I'm dead. It means that you didn't figure out the truth about my feelings for you. The truth is, I love you, Camilo. I have for about a year and I thought your friendship was enough. Turns out I was wrong. Turns out I needed your love to live.

Love, Y/N

He had lost his best friend and it was because of himself. It was all his fault that you were dead.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dolores heard his cries and knocked on the door. When she didn't hear a response from Camilo, she went in to check on him. She saw the petals on the bed and the letter beside them. She went to go get Isabela. Isabela saw the petals and immediately knew what the meaning of the flowers were.

"Who died?" Isabela asked once they were out of his room.

"What!?"

"The marigolds. Who died."

"Y/N. She died of hanahaki today. Camilo was just there." She held up the letter. "Turns out she loved him and didn't know that he loved her back."

"He loves her, and now his love will never get returned. He's going to die too."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Camilo just sobbed in his room coughing out more petals. He soon started coughing up whole Forget-me-nots because they could go through his throat easier than the marigolds. He constantly shifted between you and himself, not even thinking about it.

He heard his door open but he didn't care. You were gone. If he had just told you how he felt. You had loved him and didn't realize that he loved you back. If he had just told you.

He heard his sister and cousin in the hall but he couldn't care. At least if he died, he could see you again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Camilo woke up to Mirabel knocking on his door, telling him it was time for dinner. He didn't even realize he had fallen asleep. Camilo sat up and looked at the door.

"Go away. I'm not hungry."

"Primo? Are you alright? You're never not hungry."

Camilo got up and opened the door with tears in his eyes to see a surprised Mirabel standing there.

"Am I alright?! AM I ALRIGHT?! My best friend and girl that I'm in love with is dead, and its my fault, and you want to know if I'm alright?! I am currently dying inside right now and you're asking me if I'm alright?! What is wrong with you?!" Camilo could be heard from downstairs and everyone looked around the corner of the stairs to see him confronting Mirabel.

He slammed his door in Mirabel's face and went back into his room. The mirrors all around were mocking him as he shifted between himself, you, and Mirabel. Every time he turned back into you, he had to close his eyes and bite his lip to keep from screaming. He collapsed on the floor, coughing out flowers, the last one a whole marigold.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Well I'm going to cry if I write anymore for this so.....

You're welcome for your daily dose of emotions!

[bffsoobin]

Windflower

01|02|03|04|05|06

↳ after a heartbreak you find yourself in a small town looking for purpose. you find employment with Choi Soobin and his impressive ancestral home. when you start to fall in love again, there’s no way for you to predict what you find in the depths of the home and Soobin’s mind.

➤ hanahaki au, fluff, angst

Word Count:1,568

Warnings: mentions of food, some swearing, mentions of past relationships/unrequited love, mentions of surgery (not in detail). General warning that its 11 pm here and for me that’s late (old lady alert) and I didn’t proofread as usual.

A/N: Another character building chapter! There is very important info about both Soobin and reader in here, so make sure you pay attention and read well!  

•:•.•:•.•:•:•:•:•:•:•:•☾☼☽•:•.•:•.•:•:•:•:•:•:•:••:•.•

Dinner was surprisingly good, given the two of you had just thrown a frozen pizza in the oven. He had fussed adorably over adding extra cheese to the meal before popping it into the shiny appliance. It was easy to tell Soobin still felt awkward due to almost seeing you naked because he kept at least 5 feet of distance between your bodies for a long while. His skittish nature made it difficult for you to help set the table, but you let it slide. You don't know much about him; so it felt wrong to pass judgement on the way he couldn’t even keep eye contact for a while. It was okay, though, because his behavior still managed to rustle up glee in your stomach. The pizza was one of the best meals you had eaten in days, and you thanked Soobin profusely for it. He smiled awkwardly, waving you off with a joke about owing him breakfast in the morning. His personality had brightened ten shades with the help of food and his favorite tv show on the big screen television mounted on the wall of the living room. He had a whole pint of Half Baked ice cream open on the coffee table that was just for him. He had offered to share, but you turned him down upon seeing the absolutely ravenous look on his face; worried that he would combust on the spot if you didn’t let him have the pint to himself.  So you settled for watching the show absentmindedly until your mind began to wander. Intrigued by the contrast between the home’s age and the modern interior, you finally decided to ask Soobin. 

“Did someone do renovations here?” You mentally slapped yourself. Well duh, Y/N. Soobin’s ancestors who posed for oil portraits that now hung in ornate golden frames certainly didn’t install the stainless steel refrigerator and pick out the large leather sectional you were currently lounging on. He didn’t seem to catch the poor wording of your question as he nodded from his spot on the couch next to you with his legs tucked underneath him. You couldn’t help but notice how adorable he looked sitting that way.

“Yeah, my cousin did most of that kind of stuff. He’s a few years older than me so he was able to update the house for us when he was still living here. That’s his whole thing,” Soobin wiggled his fingers in the air, “interior design. Consulted at the shop a few towns over and everything.”

“I heard that he moved, why?” The back of your neck grew hot when you realized how insensitive that question really sounded once it was said out loud. “You don’t have to answer me, by the way,” you hoped that the attempt to backtrack would be enough to curb potential awkwardness. God knows the two of you couldn’t afford any more of that. 

“He met a girl online who lives a few states away and fell in love with her. He was wasting all of his money traveling back and forth to see her, so he finally decided to just move. The only things keeping him here were me and taking care of the house. I miss him sometimes, but I can’t blame him. He was starting to grow flowers for her, and she made it very clear that unless he could move to live with her, he would have to get the surgery.” Soobin’s voice had taken on a very odd tone that felt too complicated to unpack at the moment. Besides, your own chest began to burn at the mention of growing flowers. 

The boy must have noticed the way you gently grasped the soft fabric of your t-shirt between your fingers as his eyes widened like a deer in headlights. He made a miniscule scooch over the leather cushions to get a bit closer to you and place a hesitant hand on your shoulder. His voice was extremely soft and quiet even for as close as he was to you. 

“I’m sorry Y/N, I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable, I didn’t know that you…” he licked his plump lips as he hesitated, “Did you have surgery? You don’t have to answer me either, by the way.” Of course you had seen the question coming, but hearing it in the softest tone of voice you had ever heard from a human being struck a different chord in your heart. You couldn’t find it in yourself to confess your woes to his face, so you turned to your left to admire the garden from the window view. Earlier, he had happily told you the names of some of them and their meanings. Buttercups signifying innocence, Forget-me-nots representing true love, Marigolds standing for bliss. Flowers; dictating so much of your life. 

“Yeah, I had surgery.” You cursed the shaky edge in your voice. “I was in love with my best friend from college, we were roommates and he was everything I ever wanted from a boyfriend. And I thought he liked me back so,” you swallowed thickly and finally turned your head to see a confused furrow in Soobin’s brow. You knew why he looked so confused, but he would understand your emotions soon enough. “So I thought I had just caught some kind of bug when I started to grow flowers, and he was taking care of me. One day I went to the bathroom to puke and out came little purple petals. It was so confusing. He thought they were for someone else, so he comforted me and I didn’t understand why that only made me cough up more.” A hot tear escaped down your cheek and you cursed at it. Soobin’s whole body was rigid, as if your story was enough to stop all of his bodily functions in their tracks. You supposed your societally unusual show of emotions for a past love would be more than enough to elicit that response. 

“Obviously, I found out that he didn’t love me back so I went for surgery. They deemed it successful and I moved back in with him so we could just live as best friends. No flowers, no icky feelings, right?” The question was obviously rhetorical yet Soobin nodded as if cheering you on. “And everything was great, for close to a year. Until one night I woke up in a coughing fit when he wasn’t home and ended up with another god damn purple petal in my hand.” Your fist clenched at the memory of the disgustingly wet petal that had landed in your palm just to mock you. “So I went back to the hospital and they did all their tests. There’s nothing left for them to remove. No new growths, just. There’s something wrong with me. The doctor said he had read about it before, people who can’t fully move on even after removal. That was just two weeks ago. I couldn’t stay there and pretend the first surgery actually ended my feelings for him. That’s how I ended up here, with you.”

Soobin’s face was unreadable. A horribly timed laugh track blasted from the tv speakers and made you cringe. How awkward could this first day as an employee and roommate be? He had nearly seen you naked and now he knows all about your past heartbreak and medical anomaly. You inhaled a shuddering breath through your nose and busied yourself with watching the sun slowly disappear behind the trees of the property. 

“I’m so sorry. I don’t even know what to say. I can’t even relate with,” he gestured awkwardly toward his own chest, “growing flowers. I never have. That’s why I grow so many in the garden. Well, that and the family traditions. But mostly because I have always wondered what I would grow if I were in your position. And I memorize what they mean because one time I read a story that said your flowers can signify the kind of relationship you have with that person; especially since they change with every relationship. But I guess it’s kind of a blessing I’ve never loved anyone yet, huh?” You scoffed at his confession. 

“You have no idea, Soobin. I’d give everything to fall in love with someone who loves me back and push those stupid purple petals out of my system. Or to just have normal anatomy. But we live in a cruel world sometimes.” The atmosphere of the living room existed in direct opposition to your statement, as warm hues of sunset casted over every surface in a blissful haze.You could see particles of dust falling through the air as if in slow motion. Soobin hummed thoughtfully and got up to stand in front of a window. The light framed the outline of his body like a halo. 

“Lets hope,” his voice sounded just as light and airy as the room looked, “that the only flowers you encounter from now on are just the ones from the garden. No pain included.” You weren’t sure how much stock you should take in his insinuation that being here, with him, wouldn’t end in you growing flowers again. Was that an underhanded confession of attraction? You certainly didn’t have the guts to ask, but the idea made you feel weightless. 

“That would be very nice, Soobin. No pain included at all.” 

[sincerelyensouled]

😊, 👾, 👁, 🌹🌹🌹, 🌤, 🍦, 🎬, 🎤, 🎈, and 📚! (sorry asked so many, I liked this bunch of questions)

No worries, you’re good!! I wanted to answer a ton of questions anyway so it works out.

😊: what makes you happy?

Lots of dumb little things!! Rewatching a comfort episode of my favourite show, getting something in the mail, warm blankets straight out the dryer, making my friends laugh.

👾: what’s your favorite video game?

oooh favourite?? rough uhhhh the Rhythm Heaven series is one I revisit a lot, a couple of the Ace Attorney games have a stellar plots that I love, Skyward Sword is very comforting with nostalgia and it’s art style. Animal Crossing and Murder by Numbers I put wayyyy to many hours in this year. Also Paper Mario Thousand Year Door.... for all listed above... Too many games 

👁: what color are your eyes?

Already answered but black/brown :0

🌹: what’s your favorite flower?

3 more favourite flowers, coming up. Forget me Nots, they’re so nice and pretty and small. Dandelions! They might be weeds but they sure are pretty. And marigolds because they fumkin ormange

🌤: what’s your favorite type of weather?

Thunderstorms! I love watching the lightning flash across the sky and the only two loud noises that are legally allowed to exist are thunder and the rain crashing against the window

🍦: what’s your favorite flavor of ice cream?

There’s so many factors but uhhh vanilla with either oreo or cookie dough mixed in. Or soft-serve chocolate/vanilla swirl

🎬: what’s your favorite movie?

I was gonna say Pan’s Labyrinth but I only like the Ofelia parts asfasdfadf sadly I’m a basic bitch and I adore the Scott Pilgrim movie and Your Name.

🎤: what’s your favorite song?

I have MANY right now. Switzerland by The Sonder Bombs, Buttercup by Hippo Campus, Lo-fi Children by Wild Party. HOWEVER Life is Cider from the Wonder Egg Priority soundtrack is on constant loop, my brain wants to listen to it all the time I can’t make it stop

🎈: when’s your birthday?

Valentine’s Day :3

📚: what’s your favorite book?

hhhhh uhh rrr ummm, Matilda??? idk I really need to start reading more books

Thank uuuuuu 

[koshka-matryoshka]

I want to thank you

for being a part

of my the forget-me-nots

& marigolds

& all the things

that don't get old

Is it legal to do this?

I surely don't know

It's the only way

I have learned

to express myself around

other peoples' descriptions of life

I'm afraid

I'm alone

& entirely useless

[hugevampiretits]

forget-me-not? 👀

I totally didn't make you do this with my foul magic, but thanks anyway!! So yeah, theres quite a bit to tell, so lets get started.

Mainly im gonna be talking about her past iteration bc theres simply more to it, it has more backstory (sorta??), and the universe is more fleshed out (sorta????????), but more importantly, theres more cringe.

Lets look at the initial design

Its so bad💖 no hate on 2017 me but girl tf is that. There's a lot to unpack

First off, its a man. Why? I have no idea (but it gets worse). The design itself is SO BORING, there's no fun shapes, no accent colors, its just blue, black, white and for some reason brown. And that face mask is disgusting <3 You can also see his age, which is irrelevant, his likes (cornflowers, ???) and dislikes (cats, autumn) which are bad. Why doesn't he likes cats, who hurt him? And why does he has a gun? And kinda looks like he's part of the military? Buckle up, were going to the lore land.

Idk if he has any beef with cats, but he IS a part of the military lol. Who do they fight? Monsters. Just monsters™. So basically, apocalypse happened, which doesn't explain why theres magic at all, but we'll pretend it does, so now there's monsters and someone has to fight them. Heres where that military thingie comes in. Its honestly quite interesting, depending on types of magic it was divided in groups? Classes? Whatever, eden here is boring and has no magic even tho hes apparently part demon, so hes a good ol sniper. Hes Very Good At His Job™. But i have more shade to throw on my past self, you see, this 27 y.o white cishet man™ has a wife, and not just wife, she looks like a child.

What the fuck past me. What the fuck.

Thankfully, when i redesigned her i made her and forget me not just friends, but she is no longer a white cishet man™ as well. I dont remember what the moth girl's name was, probably something boring. She, whoever, had magic abilities in a way that she could control light (moth lol). Idk whats up with the cat thing, i guess i just wanted a cat girl, which i even worse. Heres her redesigned ver, her name is marigold now!!

Unfortunately its not all. The thing is, in this universe everyone had a flower. Not like, in a pot or whatever, no, they all have a flower connected to them that reflects their mood, health and all. And vice versa. So if you rip the flower out - some person may die. Also you don't know which flower you are connected to, its a surprise :). As you can guess eden here is connected to a cornflower, nothing wrong with them, i like those, they are pretty, but kinda lame choise 2017 me :/. This is probably the most stupid part of all of it. Its like a soulmate au but your soulmate is literally a flower. What the fuck. Thats it for eden aka pre redesign forget me not

And this is her now. What a glow up.

Not a boring almost middle aged white man, but a funky gal with a funky gun. Lots of fun shapes, but mainly triangles to tell more abt her character. Energetic, quick, perhaps a little untrustworthy.

I really wanted to keep that character, but i had to change almost everything in order to do so. Shes not a part of the military anymore, not in a post apocalyptic setting, but i did keep the flower theme, changing cornflowers to forget-me-nots bc they are cooler.

So, I'll be honest, she doesn't have a lot of story written out. For now shes a rebel child in a big cyber punk city, committing many crimes with her friends against the Bad Guys who rule said city. Is the demon thing completely gone? Who knows 👀

[clockworkcheetah]

♾!! hit me with them tunes

hell yeeeeeah <3

L.G. FUAD - Motion City Soundtrack (ngl i love all the lyrics to this song)

I want to thank you for being a part of my forget-me-nots and marigolds.. And all the things that don't get old.. Is it legal to do this? I surely don't know. It's the only way I have learned to express myself through other peoples' descriptions of life.. I'm afraid I'm alone and entirely useless...

(dare i say... perfect song for todd brotzman?)

put a “∞” in my ask box for some song lyrics

[pr3ttyh8machine]

Thank you @dangerous-lithium-animals for the tag ❤️

Nicknames: Niyah, Nye, Nicol, Nez

Zodiac Sign: Aries

Height: 5ft 6in (167 cm)

Languages: English and a little bit of Spanish and German

Nationality: American

Favorite season: Winter! It’s hot in California 24/7 so winter is my down time

Favorite flower: Forget me nots, marigold, carnation, rose

Favorite scent: Cigarettes, rain or natural/earthy scents

Favourite Fictional Character: I’m not sure..

Coffee, Hot Tea, or Hot Chocolate: none

Average Sleep: 8 hrs or more

Dogs or Cats: Both!

Number of Blankets: two or three

Dream Trip: I really want to visit Europe and Japan. I love the culture and their both beautiful places. I’d for sure visit Italy to see all the art museums (Sistine Chapel is one of my favorites. I hope to visit it one day).

Blog Established: August 2019

Random Fact: I have the same birthday as Elton John; the Rocket Man himself