#i want to do it bc it sounds fun but I'm struggling with like describing actions and also how exactly to have jack breaking down

[brucewaynehater101]

I miss the feeling I had when I first joined this fandom, I knew virtually nothing so everything was correct and I loved everything, even if that stuff just isn’t true, i was like

Bruce is a bit emotionally constipated but loves his kids? Hell yeah sounds legit

dick is a silly happy flippy man who is a bit promiscuous? Love that for him

Jason is a mega feminist literature nerd who is also buff and takes care of the street kids? Perfect man honest

Tim is a nerd who never sleeps and is queer and has never known the touch of a man nor woman? Sweet

Steph is waffle obsessed goofball? Well I prefer pancakes but right on

Cass is a mute badass who loves her fam? I love her

Duke is a normal dude? Well someone has to be and he seems neat

Alfred can do no wrong? Aight, I love old perfect tea men

Damian is a little prick? So are all middle schoolers give him time

But then I had to go learn about the characters and now I have complex opinions about them, and can see the inherent racism and sexism in how they are portrayed

You know before I joined the bat fandom I did not use the exclude tag in ao3? Like tmnt and dp have some bad stuff but usually I could just scroll past.

but now I am having to avoid fics where whole ass adults are bullying and/or oversexulizing a child

Im constantly on the look out for untagged batcwst

I struggle to find fics that don’t describe dicks ass

I have been in this fandom for probably about two years now and y’all I swear

sorry for ranting, and don’t worry I love all your stuff and I know the just back click don’t leave mean comments rule

I’m just tried bc most of the stuff I thought was true turned out to be false

Mm. I do find it a little exhausting trying to navigate the lines of what's canon, what shouldn't be canon (but is due to racism/sexism/homophobia/etc.), and just having fun.

I'm also trying to cultivate the mindset of what I've seen on Tumblr about not policing other people's ships/ideas. I am highly uncomfortable with some (particularly underaged people and adults dating), but I'm also not leaving hate comments. Like you said, the backspace exists for a reason.

Idk. There's a toooon of takes/ideas about the batfam that are inherently false, but as long as they aren't racist/sexist/etc takes, I don't see the harm in them. So what if someone wants a coffee obsessed Tim? So what if Jason's kill code is very strict? As long as they don't claim it's canon, let them be

But yeah. I have a mile long exclude list for fics on AO3. I used to use it only for triggers (I can not do stockhold syndrome, my lords), but now it's got other weird ass shit I've stumbled upon (I saw a fic where the batkids were spanked as punishment??? Like I said, not gonna leave hate comments or single anyone out. Just not my cup of tea).

I also am usually not a fan of romance/sex. It's why the batfam intrigued me so much (found families usually don't have that in it). I like exploring dynamics outside of romance and thus love the batfam. They've got so much going on that romance/sex is not needed. They are such a mess without that dynamic being added (talking about the Bats getting with a third party, but, again, trying not to yuck anyone's yum).

However, I agree. There's a ton of misinformation within fandom. I like how complex canon gets with the characters, but there's also widely different takes with them (mostly talking about Bruce here. He can either be trying or just a straight up horrible dad).

[explosionshark]

2024 AOTY

by me! your pal, bri-bri

originally i was going to just write up the first ten albums or so, but then i had things i wanted to say about the rest of 'em so i just kept going. that made the list really long though. so here's just the numbered list, under the cut you'll find my extended thoughts n feelings :)

What I'll Leave Behind by Void of Vision

For Your Consideration by Empress Of

Sanshi by Ripped to Shreds

Coup de Grace by Seeyouspacecowboy

Aumicide by Atrae Bilis

Children of the Moon by State Faults

Ridiculous and Full of Blood by Julie Christmas

Absolute Elsewhere by Blood Incantation

Lonely People [EP] by Love Rarely

Cutting the Throat of God by Ulcerate

Infinite Mortality by Replicant

I Got Heaven by Mannequin Pussy

Valerie by Tei Shi

Forever by Charly Bliss

You Could Do It Tonight by Couch Slut

World Fighter by Angel Sword

Hicimos Crecer un Bosque by Fin del Mundo

Ephemera [EP] by Ben Quad

Stygian Rose by Crypt Sermon

Infinite Void by With Sails Ahead

Vault of Horrors by Aborted

Revelations by Sarah Shook & the Disarmers

Steps Ascending by Stand Still

The Tower by Urban Heat

AOTY 2024

Full list here: write-ups for specific albums under th cut. Ranked somewhat arbitrarily.

1. What I'll Leave Behind by Void of Vision (metalcore) - absolute bummer that this will be the final album by these guys, but I'm grateful for the fact that I was able to see them a few times before they had to call it quits. Been describing this as like a song missing from the Saw 2 soundtrack or something that should have been playing at one of the clubs in Vampire The Masquerade: Bloodlines or something. I feel like that's accurate - alt metalcore with its nails painted black and a profound love of Nine Inch Nails. Strong lyricism drawn from real trauma, enough fun electronics to make them stand out from more generic metalcore acts, plenty of hooks and some sick breakdowns as well to keep things heavy. I hope Jack Bergin's brain never explodes again and retiring from touring helps him lead a long and healthier life. "Gamma Knife" is the highlight for me

2. For Your Consideration by Empress Of (Pop) - my favorite pop album of the year. Lorely Rodriguez is so insanely talented, this album has a pretty diverse range of sounds without becoming too inconsistent. I love that there's raunchy club bangers like "Femenine" right next to sappy love songs like "Kiss Me" and more introspective tracks like "What Type of Girl Am I?"

3. Sanshi by Ripped to Shreds (Death Metal) - very good year for death metal but I think this is my favorite DM record of the year. I've always enjoyed Andy Lee's projects and Ripped to Shreds has been my favorite of them for years but expanding to a full band has taken them to a whole nother level. Killer riffage throughout, insanely fun lead swapping between Lee and Michael Chavez. "Horrendous Corpse Resurrection" is easily one of my top songs of the year

4. Coup de Grace by Seeyouspacecowboy (Metalcore) - this was a big big SYSC year for me, in large part bc I ended up seeing them live so many times. Honestly initially I struggled with Coup de Grace because it leans harder into the dramatic, theatrical MCR/P!ATD style of emo than any of their other work, and that's not necessarily to my taste. This still makes the top 5 despite regularly skipping several songs on each listen because the rest of it is so damn good. Could not stop listening to it this fall. Safe to say it grew on me. "Chewing the Scenery" and "Subtle Whispers to Take Your Breath Away" were two of my most played tracks for the whole year

5. Aumicide by Atrae Bilis (Death Metal) - one of the most underrated death metal bands active rn imo. No sophomore slump for these guys, this record absolutely smokes from start to finish. It's heavy and it's nasty, but it still grooves. There's enough melody to make it addictive but they're still able to maintain the harshness that makes dissonant death metal compelling. "Hell Simulation" and the closing track "Excruciate Incarnate" are perfect examples of the balance they strike between those two modes

6. Children of the Moon by State Faults (post-hardcore) - 2024 was the year I discovered State Faults. Very much the experience of finding a band that is so much Your Shit that it feels insane that you're almost a decade late to the party. Children of the Moon is the best post-hardcore album of the year imo and it's not even close. These guys draw from an incredible range of influences to create some of the most affecting work in the genre - brutal and beautiful and profound. "Palo Santo" and "No Gospel" absolutely blow me away every time

7. Ridiculous and Full of Blood by Julie Christmas (post-metal? Noise? Julie Christmascore) - anyone already familiar with Julie Christmas' work does not need me to explain why she's such a powerhouse and anyone not familiar will be done a disservice by anything short of listening to her music for themself. All I can truly say about Ridiculous and Full of Blood is that it's one of the most dynamic, interesting albums of the year and I just hope to God she doesn't make us wait another 14 years for her next solo record. The band she assembled for this album is insane across the board, but in particular it was a delight to see her collaborating with Johannes Persson again eight years after the absolutely masterful collaboration with Cult of Luna. If you listen to only one song out of all the stuff I'm recommending today, let it be "The Lighthouse"

8. Absolute Elsewhere by Blood Incantation (progressive death metal) - everyone won't shut up about this album but in this case the praise is absolutely earned. Cosmic, atmospheric, brutal, spacey, heavy as hell. With a Tangerine Dream collaboration no less! Essentially comprised of two long songs, Absolute Elsewhere is a record you need to make time for, meant to be listened to in full to get the most out of it, but it's so, so worth it to take the time. A stunning, transportive piece

9. Lonely People [EP] by Love Rarely (post-hardcore/math rock) - my favorite EP of the year. A very exciting band, they fuse hooky, math rock riffs with post-hardcore intensity. Courtney Levitt's vocals are incredible - a combination of throat shredding shrieks and powerful, emotional clean singing that makes you instantly sit up and pay more attention. "Say Yes" was on repeat for me all year

10. Cutting the Throat of God by Ulcerate (death metal) - an absolutely crushing, depressive, beautiful piece of dissonant death metal. Undeniably heavy, but on this outing we see Ulcerate lean into some post-rock esque melodicism that elevates their sound even further. It's such an atmospheric album - grim and unrelenting, but strangely delicate in places. Top notch musicianship throughout, but Jaime Saint-Merat's drumming is just mind-blowing. The title track is a must-listen song for anyone who gives a shit about heavy music at all

11. Infinite Mortality by Replicant (Death Metal) - I noticed in my write-ups for the other two dissonant death metal albums on this list, I took a moment to highlight and praise the melodicism therein. That won't be happening for Infinite Mortality. That's not to say there's zero melody at all but to emphasize how much that's not the draw here. This album is an altogether darker, nastier, more menacing affair. There's a grime here, a dizzying, sinister undertone of violence. My first time listening to this record was as background music while I was reading Crypt of the Moon Spider by Nathan Ballingrud and there was a scene in that book I was reading during "Orgasm of Bereavement" where the combination of the sounds I was hearing and the words I was reading gave me a full-body sensory experience: goosebumps, a faint sense of nausea, slight dizziness. I can't think of a stronger album recommendation than that.

12. I Got Heaven by Mannequin Pussy (Rock) - ANOTHER BANGER FROM MISSY DABICE AND CO. Mannequin Pussy keep getting better and better and it seems like they're finally (deservedly) starting to blow up with this record. It's a joy to listen to - snarky, vulnerable, earnest, clever, joyful and pissed off in turns. "Loud Bark" is already iconic, easily one of the finest songs they've written in an already stacked career of certifiable bangers

13. Valerie by Tei Shi (pop) - my second favorite pop album of the year! Tei Shi's first independent release. The breadth of songs on this album is incredible - bachata inflected pop kicks the album off with the explosively catchy "QQ (QUÉDATE QUERIENDOME)" and by the middle of the record we've somehow transitioned to intimate, heart wrenchingly vulnerable meditations on a painful miscarriage with "Falling From Grace." Frustration with the major label rat race as well as evergreen pop subjects of love and heartbreak fill out the rest of the album, but no matter the topic or the style of the song, everything feels honest and confident. The Spanglish version of "Mona Lisa" is one of my favorite pop songs of the year

14. Forever by Charly Bliss (Rock/Power Pop) - talking about honest, vulnerable music! Charly Bliss made their comeback this year and it's unsurprisingly one of the best albums to come out in 2024. Forever feels like a great marriage of the sounds on their other two LPs, Guppy and Young Enough. The band is still leaning into the pop sound that clearly enthralls them but there's a welcome return for fun guitar riffs too. Also there's no album on this list that has a stronger opening than the three song run of "Tragic" to "Calling You Out" to "Back There Now"

15. You Could Do It Tonight by Couch Slut (Sludge Metal/Noise) - okay enough pop music time for something gross and gnarly and almost guaranteed to give you some kind of disease. Couch Slut have always been here to upset you - and holy shit are they good at it on this album. Each and every song on this record is a provocative, stomach-churning vignette in its own right but none moreso than "The Donkey" where Megan Osztrosits recounts a horrifyingly fucked up story of a friend's drug-fueled bout of self mutilation in Chat Pile-esque spoken word over massive, dirty sludge metal riffs. It's fucking sick. "Here's what happened when my friends and I got fired from a haunted water park" - tell me you don't want to hear how the rest of this story goes, even knowing it will end in a grotesque, bloody mess.

16. World Fighter by Angel Sword (Heavy Metal) - okay enough edgelord shit now we're back to having fun. I honestly didn't think there would be a trad metal release that would top Razor Wire by Mean Mistreater, and then I stumbled into Angel Sword this summer. It's just candy, man. Extremely catchy 80s style riffs, incredible hooks, gritty yet charming vocals. This album is dripping in neon, racing down the highway at 90 miles an hour with two topless babes in the backseat telling you how cool your studded denim jacket and fresh perm look. "Vigilantes" never gets old for me

17. Hicimos Crecer un Bosque by Fin del Mundo (shoegaze) - kinda wild that this is the only shoegaze album that made it onto my list this year but it is what it is! And what it is in this case is the killer second album by Argentinian band Fin del Mundo. If you like fuzzy guitars and ethereal vocals, this is the record on this list for you. Although labeling them a shoegaze band is accurate, it fails to account for the ways post-rock, emo, and dream pop elevate the bands sound to another level. It's a record that's soothing and engaging at the same time, well produced, clear sounding without being too polished. "Vivimos lejos" brings a charming kind of ASIWYFA-style combination of gang vocals and emo instrumentals, resulting in basically four and half perfect minutes of music

18. Ephemera [EP] by Ben Quad (post-hardcore) - many bands are doing the throwback 00s emo/metalcore thing right now, but few of them are doing it as well as Ben Quad on this EP. This is basically They're Only Chasing Safety-worship but that's fine by me. Frantic, melodic, scathing and nakedly emotional, I love the intensity of this EP. I'd kill for a full record in this style tbh, but for now I'll be happy with what we've got. It's an incredibly short 11 minute runtime so I'd really recommend just listening to the whole thing but if nothing else, don't skip "Your Face as an Effigy"

19. Stygian Rose by Crypt Sermon (Epic Heavy Metal) - epic heavy metal, I'm sure, sounds like the stupidest genre name in the world. But like, listen to Stygian Rose and you'll immediately understand there's nothing else that describes it as well. Big, heavy doomy guitars, fast drumming, crazy soloing, nimble bass riffage, powerful heavy metal vocals and lyrics about like wizards and evil kings and stuff? Lie to yourself if you want, but I know the truth. This album fucks hard. "Heavy is the Crown of Bone" and "Glimmers in the Underworld" are crushing, face-melting works of fantasy bullshit. I can't get enough of this album

20. Infinite Void by With Sails Ahead (Post-hardcore) - I discovered these guys through a collaboration with Pulses. last year and I spent most of the intervening time eagerly anticipating the release of their debut LP Infinite Void. And let me tell you, it did not disappoint. It's an incredibly confident and fun first record - firmly on the Swancore side of PHC but lacking a lot of what tends to annoy me in that subgenre (insufferable songs about the male ego). Sierra Binondo's powerful and diverse vocal range really takes these guys to another level in a genre where extremely talented musicians are a dime a dozen. Go listen to "Ryn" right now and tell me you're not at least a little bit in love now

21. Vault of Horrors by Aborted (Brutal Death Metal) - it's Aborted! It's a cheeseburger. But it's a really, really, really good cheeseburger after you've been craving one for ages. This record has two gimmicks - all the songs are based on horror movies and each has a feature from a guest vocalist. Admittedly, I find brutal/tech death to be kind of wearying after a while and this tends to affect listenability for me, which is precisely why this album has a place on my AOTY list - I don't get tired of it. It's brutal and punishing but catchy and fun to listen to. Daníel Konráðsso absolutely does not sound like a human being on this. I bet his calf muscles are insane, because the double bass on this record is frankly disgusting. "The Golgothan" has my favorite riff of the record, but there's no bad tracks, honestly

22. Revelations by Sarah Shook & the Disarmers (Alt Country) - haven't really figured out a way to talk about this band that doesn't feel at least a little bit like deadnaming singer/guitarist River Shook but they've yet to change their band name so! Admittedly, not a very country heavy year for me, but if everything I've dabbled in, Revelations is the easy standout. Continuing the band's legacy of clever, honest lyricism and rollicking country rock musicianship, Revelations feels like the best version of their sound yet. "Motherfucker" is a straightforward, righteously pissed off ode to gross, predatory men in the industry, "Backsliders" is a good old fashioned broken-hearted ode to a bad relationship, while "Jane Doe" is the easy standout shot through with emotion, clever lyricism and brilliant guitar work

23. Steps Ascending by Stand Still (Pop Punk/Melodic Hardcore) - I was a teen in the 00s so I'll always be weak to that very Long Island melodic hardcore in 2004 sound that this album is evoking so perfectly. I love fast drums, I love posi philosophical lyrics, I love those melodic, angular guitar riffs, I love a guy shouting and I love gang vocals. Those things in combination just always work on me. "We Know the Score" + "Mysticism" are the perfect 'holler along at the top of your lungs in the car' combo

24. The Tower by Urban Heat (Post-Punk) - one of my most anticipated albums of the year. When they started the album rollout with singles like "Sanitizer" and "Right Time of Night" I had a pretty good idea that the final product would have a good shot at being one of my favorite records of the year. And of course I was right. Most Post-Punk isn't quite capable of keeping my attention, but Urban Heat are so damn good at songcraft. The songs on this record are incredibly dynamic, ranging from the snotty disdain of the aforementioned "Sanitizer" to the surprising tenderness of the New Wave ballad "Seven Safe Places." It's an incredibly strong showing from a really exciting band. I've heard they're killer live, too. Maybe if I'm lucky this coming year I'll get a chance to find out for myself.

And that's it! 24 for 24

Except for these also >:)

Honorable Mentions (aka albums it killed me to leave off this list so I'm cheating by adding them here)

Club Shy [EP] by Shygirl

Prude by Drug Church

It's Inside You by Candy

Sunrise Over Rigor Mortis by Beaten to Death

Verses in Oath by Hulder

Beating the Drums of Ancestral Force by Tzompantli

Agony & Wounds by Obscene

Cure by ERRA

Songs of Blood and Mire by Spectral Wound

The Cycles of Trying to Cope by Like Moths to Flames

Razor Wire by Mean Mistreater

I'll Drown on This Earth by Cold Gawd

Heaven Let them Die [EP] by Counterparts

Dark Superstition by Gatecreeper

[torialefay]

this may be kind of an unusual question so feel free to ignore it, but i tend to make lots of links and associations of concepts/situations with music and stuff and so i'm curious, what are some songs that you'd pick to describe what it would be like to be in a relationship with chan? or some songs that suit his placements (for example, i think work song by hozier is peak scorpio venus devotion level haha)

okay i LOVE this question!!! (also currently in a hozier phase so i love that you brought up that song.) if you have any other recs, pls send them my way, but here's some that had come to mind:

✨🎶 Dating Channie Sounds Like 🎶✨

the friendship/relationship stage:

i don't think it's just me who thinks that chan is gonna have to know & be friends with someone before progressing to a romantic relationship. i think he could definitely pine over someone for a while and be too scared to say anything. and then if something DID happen between the two of you, you would have to hide it for a pretty longgg time. that's why i chose these 2 songs :)

• human - dodie ft tom walker ✨

• hush hush - the band camino✨

actual committed relationship phase:

• medicine - royal sugar ✨ this gives me such new-relationship, pent-up sexual tension vibes. this man would not be able to stop thinking ab you sexually when you first get together... 100%. sex w/ him is likely initially more fun, like in this song, but once he gets to KNOW you, it gets wayyyy deeper

• tenerife sea - ed sheeran ✨ this one might be a cop-out bc chan has sung it multiple times on channie's room but i couldn't NOT put it in here. moving past the superficial, this song paints such a new, mesmerizing love story. you are elated you finally found your person.

• mess is mine - vance joy ✨ i'm sorry but the lyrics "this body is yours and mine" & "now your mess is mine" is so channie-coded to me. he is offering himself up to you. anything you want from him is yours & he will take on all of your hurt

• fire and the flood AND lay it on me - vance joy ✨ these were just so all-encompassing, i couldn't not include them. you become the most consuming part of his life. he quite literally can't go a day without thinking of you and how fucking attached his heart is to yours. you are his everything and only thing. "i always feel you in my blood" & "your love's always finding me out."

• until you - ahi ✨ this song isn't as relevant NOW, but it really throws me into a pre-debut channie love story tbh. bless his little heart 💔 i couldn't NOT include it bc it's still beautiful.

• anointed - miguel AND religion - lana del rey ✨ these have the same purpose, so i'm including them together. when channie is truly in love with you, he won't fuck you- he fucking worships you. well, you worship each other in the bedroom. and i feel this a million times. he needs something deeper and he needs to feel consumed in it. praising each other until you physically have no stamina left in your body.

tough times/drifting apart/ fights:

sorry but i had to add a couple of angsty songs that i could totally see playing out in a relationship w channie </3

• fleeting love - royal sugar ✨ i 100% see this song being about your struggles with a long distance relationship. not being able to work anything out, but also not being able to let them go. "in the elevator with your passport... goodbye is 10 floors down." you just want him so badly, but you don't know you can do this. you were so happy to have him, even if just for a little bit.

• berenstein - the band camino ✨ chan always talks about alternate universes, so i had to add this one in. the line "at another place in time, you were infinitely mine," it makes me think so much about if you were perfect with channie, and you both knew that... but you simply couldn't be with him because of his idol life. but you knew that somewhere out there in a parallel universe, he wasn't an idol, and you were together like you were meant to be :((((

bonus song:

this song reminds me SO MUCH of chris. the first time i heard it, i instantly thought of him. it isn't a love song by any means, it just makes me think of him && his life/all he's been through ❤️

• time's eyes - riley pearce ✨

if anyone has a song they automatically think of with channie, pls pls pls let me knowwww!!!

[stupidlittlespirit]

Hello!

Sorry if this has already been asked before, but do you have any tips for writing Ford?

Thank you and I'm sending you a virtual hug <3 🫂

Hey!

Thank you so much <3

I'll put some of the stuff I find helps me below here. I find it really hard to describe sometimes so if it doesn't make sense or if you want clarification then let me know :)

Be familiar with the source material. This might sound silly but I've seen fics where the a/n is like 'yeah I haven't read Journal 3 or finished the show but I wanted to write-' .....Please. Just. Finish the show and the Journal. The Journal gives you TONS of useful insight into Ford's actual personality and I think you see a lot more of his mannerisms in it. Rewatch his episodes. Use what you've got of canon stuff.

Watch other stuff with JK Simmons in. It'll be helpful for you to pick up how he sounds and then make it easier replay his tone in your head and make your dialogue more accurate. I don't actually know how helpful this tip is bc I brought this up to my partner (RE: Hearing the character's exact voice in your head as you write) and they said this isn't really something people do, so I'm not sure if I'm alone in that technique or not....? (also sorry Mr Simmons but a lot of your movies are d o g s h i t! So, suffer through them as much as you can for the sake of research. Whiplash isn't in the bad pile though btw, it's one of the greatest movies ever made. Just watch that 14 times in a row until you can quote the entire thing by heart. Or use Portal/Cave Johnson audio. Much more fun.)

Know the Ford you're writing. Is he younger, likely at college? Is he research-era? Is he post-portal? Ford presents (at least to me) as multiple different versions of himself over the course of his journey. He has fundamental traits but the degree to which he displays/shows/acknowledges/applies them varies dramatically depending on where he is in life and who he's around.

Balance him. He's strict and sharp and sometimes rude, but not so much that he's devoid of all other emotion. He's funny and he likes to get silly sometimes. We're literally told that exact thing (quite a lot actually) in the canon material. This is especially relevant if you're writing post portal Ford or pre-Bill/pre-obsession-with-work Ford. Again, he isn't all the time but he definitely is more than people give him credit for. If you're writing Ford during his Bill obsession stage then he's going to be erratic and harmful, more than anything to himself. He's going to be acting poorly because he isn't in his right mind, so extend some sympathy to the guy. You don't have to make it okay that he might be lashing out and hurting others, obviously, but there's a reason behind why he's acting like that. He isn't just 'a bad guy'.

However, he is also an asshole sometimes. Everyone can be. He's very diverse. This diva HAS the range! (He experiences the world in a very different way to most other people, I think, so his behaviour can be perceived as difficult to 'normal' people).

Ford is never one emotion at a time. No character is. If he's angry, there's going to be a reason behind that anger and then several emotions behind that reason. Is he telling someone off because he's intrinsically and irrevocably an asshole? No! He might have been afraid of them getting hurt and snapped at them, and the fear shows as anger. Maybe he's frustrated with them and doesn't know how to appropriately address that frustration. There's always a reason.

If he is just being a bit of jerk, because that's plausible, it's not going to be the case that every time he does something that can be perceived as being jerky, that he is being so.

He is very full of love. For his family, for his work, for his friends, for his object of affection (these tips apply to him in general, if you're writing ship stuff or reader stuff or gen). He is full to the brim with it, he just struggles to identify it, to know how to show it and how to express it.

I think that for Ford, acknowledging his feelings is a bit like touching a hot stove: He recoils from them immediately because feelings are painful and intense, and they're hard to handle. They hurt and he's going to be loathe to keep touching the thing that reliably burns him every time he goes near it. Ford isn't very good at being bad at things and he IS bad at emotions. Really bad. They're not finite or logical or able to be proven like science is. They're artistic and available for interpretation, and they're often nonsensical. That's hard to get your head around for someone who likes to view everything from a black and white perspective.

If you think he has a disorder (autism, BPD, NPD, HPD, whatever) and you yourself don't have that thing, then RESEARCH THE FUCKING THING! Ask people who do have it for advice. Treat it with respect. People that have 'negative traits' from these types of disorders (and believe me, people do think you're awful if you have a personality disorder or autism) are not inherently bad people and them enacting their symptoms doesn't make them evil, provided they know how to acknowledge their wrongdoing post behaviour and try to do better in the future. If I split on someone and act out by starting a fight, it is my responsibility to return to that person and apologise for inappropriately starting a fight once I've cooled down. It can be hard, it can be done through gritted teeth, it will be uncomfortable, but it must still be done because I'm an adult. Obviously, when it comes to things like this, we're always working on a sliding scale because people with complex mental health issues don't always know they've made a mistake so they may not feel like they need to apologise/may not even know that they've done something wrong if they're in a really bad episode. That's difficult to get right however, and I would not recommend writing intensely detailed stuff like that unless you're very used to/accustomed to the disorder.

HE KNOWS HOW TO SAY SORRY and he knows when he's fucked up. This is a skill he's learnt better over time. I think it would be most relevant to use if you're writing him post-portal, though. I don't think this was a skill he had when he was younger/pre-portal and if he did apologise, it was something that had to be really dragged out of him.

Show that he's tender and capable of empathy. I think it was only really during his obsessional years that he locked off that part of his brain, and even then it was more out of pure delusion and trauma/self-protection than it was an inherent drive to be evil. He's never been evil, just misguided, betrayed and a bit of an ass at times.

He does more through action than through talk. In comparison to Stan, who is all mouth and uses verbal communication frequently, Ford is more physically inclined. He tries to be very esoteric but he gives away a lot in his behaviour instead of talking. I don't actually think he knows he does this and that's why he thinks he's super mysterious.

If you're stuck on a scene, play it out as him. Not yourself. It's not so much how am I going to do this, but how is Ford going to do this? What do you think Ford would do in that moment, according to what you've seen him do in the show?

Don't be afraid to make your own Ford, to a certain extent. I'm not writing about a strictly canon!Ford. He's informed by canon for the most part, but he's also my little barbie to dress up and be silly with. I don't necessarily have to solely make him do what I think his canon counterpart would do. I think canon!Ford is aroace/just not interested in romantic or sexual relationships. I don't think he has interest in much of the stuff that my fanon!Ford does, but this is fantasy land and Ford isn't real so we can do whatever we want. He'll feel more real if you give him his canon traits and then add some of your own spices to the recipe on top.

Be nice to him. This isn't advice, I'm just begging you LMAO. When you're writing him talk about his science stuff or whatever, have your other character (reader, I presume?) be engaged and happy to listen to him. I wouldn't be interested in someone who annoyed me with their passions, so don't write it as though he pisses you off because the audience can tell if you don't actually like him that much. They will pick up on how you really feel about a character as the author unless you're an excellent liar and it's really hard to actually lie like that and retain a sense of genuine love in your story. Just treat him with love and care. Treat any character with it.

Okay anyway WHEW that's a lot! Sorry. These are just things that I do and they're not my view of how to write Ford 'correctly' or anything, they're just what I find helps me characterise him for my fics. I'm sure plenty of people would disagree with my interpretation and that's fine, we're all receptive to art in different ways so there's not really a 'right' way to be for the most part. Just listen to what he tells you/shows you about himself and the way in which other characters speak about him truthfully.

[inchidentally]

Why do you think Max f protect Lando like his children? Do you think he does it because he saw how Lando struggled in f1 and couldn't just stand there and watch?? 🤔

oh anon idk how much Lando/Max F lore you know but Max has been Lando's protector from day one. Lando was teeeeeny tiny for his age up until like 19?? so Max was bigger than him up until around then. I'm still learning a lot about them as I go but Max's protective instincts toward Lando run extremely deep. it's why I can't decide if they're more common law husbands, platonic soulmates or each other's weird gamer racing gremlin guardian angels.

I think for me one of the biggest standouts for me about their bond is how much Lando wanted to look after Max when Max left racing for good. because when you read about Max's particular struggles, it's like hearing Lando all over again:

Getting bad results each weekend was just having more of a knock-on effect on my mental health. Normally, I’d say that’s one of my strengths through a championship. That’s how I’ve been able to win titles, I’m able to stay calm under pressure and I don’t let many things get to me but when you have a bad qualifying result and you see guys up there that you know you’re capable of beating, it definitely takes a dig at you inside and it’s been a lot to process throughout the year. -- As soon as more thoughts come into your head, it gets worse, then you start panicking, over-driving, and it all goes wrong. I think a lot of the pressure is in your head, but it does get to a point where it just all piles on you. [source]

it's got to mean the world to have a best mate who can completely and openly identify with exactly what you're feeling - esp since they're each now looking at racing from the inside and the outside.

what I find interesting is that Max was just as much of a hyper competitive kid as everyone who came up through that system and from what I can tell he performed strongly enough to easily assume he could make F1 (but he doesn't seem to have assumed that) so him taking to this tiny kid with all these little quirks who was absolutely dusting boys older than him, idk that's just something special about Max. he comes across as kind of gruff or misanthropic at first but he's extremely emotionally intelligent and self-aware - he's always the one to open up and be vulnerable to Lando and unlike Lando he doesn't squirm or make jokes when things get serious. it sounds like I know the guy super well which obv I don't but idk, it just feels like Max is an easygoing but also extremely loyal guy - especially with Lando.

anyway I'm not enough of an authority on nortrell and if anyone wants to add to this please do <3 but yea

side note I always love how in this video we get a sort of funny confirmation that Max approves of Oscar as temporary guardian of Lando. but then I get a little emotional and serious about that bc Lando has cited precisely Oscar's ability to stay calm and not let things pile on top of him as something he's reminded to do for himself. and that Oscar quickly observed Lando and after only a couple months (or maybe even just a month) as his teammate realized that patience and loyalty are what make Lando feel the most relaxed and comfortable with someone. he's adorable and fun w the friends who make him laugh all the time and swat him down when he gives them attitude. but as a self-described shy kid who's also hyperactive, you can see the difference between Lando alone with Max and Lando with other friends. and well, Oscar spent years before his McLaren contract watching that dynamic so. makes sense he'd get the nod of approval from Lando's closest friend <3

[blossoms-phan]

I have been watching old videos in tour preparation and was staggered by how much happier and healthier Dan and Phil both look now. You can see how suffocated by the whole thing they were back for a period pre hiatus. Those years where the enjoyment and fun had gone is a tough watch.

I dipped out for a while and missed this period, and so looking back now you literally see the lights dim in Dan's eyes over a year or so, and how fed up of forcing an act he was.

The absolute chaos and fun and joy that has been post hiatus really emphasises just how tired and over hiding and lying and being yes men they must have been. It makes me appreciate this new era of content so much more. I would watch them watching grass grow, if it kept them smiling and happy and fulfilled, rather than making content for us, that made them that miserable.

oh :(( anon this really broke me and i have a lot of thoughts about this tbh.

as someone who's been lucky enough to watch them change and grow over 10 years, i think something we all know is how it's nothing compared to now, but like there was a clear shift around 2018 with tour and just the way that they presented themselves publicly. in part, they started to become a little bit more comfortable with each other and carefree about sharing certain things. again, looking back this sounds strange to say but im talking purely compared to the years before then- it was absolutely different. of course, we all know that this time was extremely difficult for dan, struggling with authenticity and "living his truth". i love ii, this is in no way dogging on it bc i think there's room to be proud of it and what they did but also the entire concept of "giving the people what they want" is almost poetic considering dan's internal turmoil during this time, like with what he said during one of those reaction videos- "c'mon dan, give the people what they want and then you can disappear forever." multiple people on here have put it like this before but there are certain points like in ii era liveshows where you can tell dan is just buzzing with this restless, frustrated energy, like he's stuck inside his own skin and can't crawl out of it.

i will say that i think just on some practical level, i like to tell myself that it wasn't all doom and gloom pre-hiatus and that there were obviously moments of happiness or comfort or things that they genuinely enjoyed doing, like travelling the world or something as small as playing a fun game. but i would be lying to myself if i denied the fact that they absolutely struggled at points, and that dan was fed up of struggling with the pain of wanting to be his true, authentic self, but being scared. again though, it's not all bad. this was the first time that dan started to accept and at least think about coming out, and all those moments where they signed pride flags and he would say things like "hopefully one day" to people who told them their stories really cements his point that the acceptance and support his audience gave helped him. the hiatus was so important for their personal growth, to heal their relationship with us, and like you pointed out they really were "yes men"- phil constantly pointing out how learning how to say no has helped a ton.

there are no words to describe this new era other than pure fun, joy, and whimsy. it's been an absolute privilege to see their personal growth, to watch them allow themselves to focus on themselves and be happy and open and watch them have the time of their lives and reassure us that they're enjoying it and not going anywhere anytime soon. i'm right there with you, i just feel so happy and appreciative of being here experiencing this new era with you all and them, and i just want them to do whatever makes them happy and fulfilled. which is what i think they're doing right now with the tour, and they knew it mere months after the comeback which they had no real long term plans for, but we showed up for them, and they know that which is why it makes the idea of our mutual "healing" and entering this new era together so exciting <3

[rescue-ram]

Now I'm curious, how would you adapt a modern version of Mash?

Oh man thank you for giving me pretext to ramble about this. I have too many thoughts about Cursed Hypothetical MASH Reboot.

Genre Change MASH is from the golden age of sitcom and is one of the best examples of the genre. Tragically, really good sitcoms don't get made, and the shorter lengths commissioned mean we wouldn't get space for the sillier or more experimental episodes that make MASH so charming and memorable. This is also why any remake or reimagining could never replace the original. There's also less "suspension of disbelief" with modern audiences, so I think modern MASH would have to have a more grounded setting and consistent time line, so RIP time loop. I think the modern genre that would best fit MASH is dramedy. Classico MASH already had elements of "get 'em laughing so they cry harder" and Hypothetical Remake MASH would play that up. Basically, we're gonna "Better Call Saul" this bitch.

In writing out my ideas below, I realized hitting the main plot beats I imagine makes this sound like. Depressing. Which it kind of would be! But I want to emphasize that in my mind's eye this would still tonally be a comedy right up until It Isn't. Similar to BCS, characters encounter obstacles, handle them in very funny ways, but things Keep Happening and compounding and at the end you realize all those funny things have added up to something horrific and inevitable.

General Thoughts In my beautiful mind, this is five twelve episode seasons, each corresponding to a roughly six month period- the first two seasons are 1951, climaxing with Henry's death, first episode or two of season 3 is Trapper leaving/BJ arriving and then 3/4 is 1952, and the final season is 1953 and the ceasefire. Fortunately, because the characters in MASH are pretty well fleshed out with a lot of traits I think they could be turned into dramedy characters pretty easily, and you can take the Big Things that happen to them and play them straight/expand on them into proper arcs. Also, pulling in more historical details could be really interesting, and an opportunity to unpack how Fully Evil the war in Korea was. In reading more memoirs from doctors who served in MASH units, I was struck by how much contact with international forces they had, and the surprising amount of contact with their Chinese/Korean counter-parts. I think more of both of those things would be fun to incorporate into Hypothetical Remake.

Expanded Roles for Nurses We need more women. And fortunately, we got them! Even though there is Not A Lot of existing canon, I really do think we have enough on the recurring nurses to act as seeds for fuller characters. I would love to see Kellye developed as a supporting character from the start. Struggling to articulate this, but I think a deeper perspective on anti-Asian sentiment could be explored through her, possibly with some connections to the history of colonialism in Korea in particular. The character was described as Chinese and Hawaiian, but given her credited surnames of Yamato and Nakamura getting a little into her Japanese heritage and the resentment of Koreans towards the Japanese could be interesting as well. I also think "Dish" Schneider's conflict, torn between loyalty to her husband/fiancee and her attraction to the handsome funny guy who relentlessly flirts with her, could be a source of drama. I also really like Ginger's recurring "thing" with Trapper in canon, and expanding that into an actual friendship and digging into the racism and taboos against interracial relationships of the period would be interesting. You can take Margie Cutler as a young and inexperienced nurse and give her a little coming of age arc. I would also love for Knocko McCarthy to be a foil for Margaret- as the second most senior nurse, she chafes under Margaret's command and kind of collaborates with the Swampmen to subvert her, culminating in Margaret calling her out that if she didn't side with them against her, they'd hate Knocko too, and them growing closer over the series.

Ho-Jon and Expanded Roles for Korean Characters Many have written about the shitty representation of Koreans in MASH, and Hypothetical Remake could remediate that significantly. I think giving Ho-Jon (or a similar new character) an expanded role would be good, with more ties to his family out of camp and conflict over whether or not supporting the occupying American forces and the south is the right thing to do or the expedient thing. I also think there's some dark comedy to be mined from a slightly subversive Ho-Jon taking advantage of racism and being seen as ignorant or interchangeable to get away with shit. Would love for Black Market Guy to be a recurring character. There's also a great real life story I read where a MASH surgeon formed a bond with a Chinese doctor after accidentally connecting to a PLA radio channel, and I think that could be adapted into a really fun source of comedy (bonding with "the enemy" over shared indignities, surprising similarities, etc) and ultimately drama (Hawkeye finds out about a US or ROK attack that will cripple that doctor's unit or put him in danger- does he say nothing, knowing hundreds will be injured or killed including maybe his new friend, or does he commit treason and risk prison or death to warn him- and how does he live with not knowing what happened when he has to choose inaction?) Any of the Very Special episodes could be adapted and expanded. And of course, Hypothetical Remake would have Korean writers, or consultants, or at the very least a goddamn baby name book so we don't end up with a dozen characters just named Kim, or worse random syllables.

Radar I would love to keep Radar as one of the main POV character throughout the whole series and use his unique position to bridge between different storylines- he's an enlisted man so he has that perspective, he's close with Hawkeye and the surgeons, he's assisting Henry/Potter so he has ties to command, give him a friendship with a nurse and you're set. Given the comedy-to-tragedy arc of dramadys, I would love to take the book detail that he enlisted with dreams of glory and becoming a general and lean fully into that. He starts out season 1 as a sweet naive farm kid flying by the seat of his pants to figure out his job, he gets more and more enmeshed with the military over the course of the series, currying favor with the brass to pull strings to help the unit/his friends/himself, and it ends with Potter giving him a recommendation for officer school- an outcome fully framed as a tragic loss of self to a corrupt institution.

Hawkeye I think Seasons 1 and 2 in particular could be driven by the Hawkeye and Trapper committing outrages and crimes in the name of justice/not giving a shit, and then having to spend the rest of the season engaging in more outrages and crimes to Bugs Bunny their way out of consequences. The central tragedy arcing through the series is the Destruction of Hawkeye Pierce. He starts out determined to stay himself, stick to his principles, and not let the army change him. The glimmer of hope at the end is that he has survived and gets to go home, but At What Cost. I also think making him bipolar makes the most sense- early season Hawkeye hints he's had highs and lows before, but always managed to cope, but under the increasing stress his mental health gets worse. Insomnia due to overwork triggers a manic episode (adapting Dr Pierce and Mr Hyde) about halfway through S1, with a major change in his relationship with Trapper associated with that, and his first on screen depressive episode triggered by Henry's death, which gets him his week of R&R he goes AWOL from. He holds it together through S3 with increasing amounts of self-medication for BJ's sake, and S4's overarching storyline for him is a fully Catch-22 expansion of The Late Captain Pierce with increasing levels of franticness to resolve it, and S5 is a full blown "I'M NOT EVEN SUPPOSED TO BE HERE" crisis culminating in the equivalent of GFA, and a brief psychotic episode triggered by his mood dysregulation and moral injury. An expansion of The Late Captain Pierce would be a great source of absurdity and drama, the ultimate consequence of his alienation of Everyone In Bureaucracy or Command (they all dislike/hate him for his antics and disrespect in S1-3 and no one wants to help him in his predicament, with a few spitefully refusing to help outright), and necessary to explain his presence in Korea in 1953 since his enlistment should've ended by then (since key members of the bureaucracy Hate him they refuse to count the months he was "dead" as part of his service, and his father is in too poor of health/financially strained from his cancer scare to advocate for him successfully stateside). I also think "playing straight" all the nurses breaking up with him after Ceasefire could be interesting. Like, S1 Hawkeye is a ladies man who's saying all the right things and juggling multiple relationships, but after they realize he doesn't Capital L Love any of them they start to distance from him- not unfriendly, but less a source of support. That alienation from others, first with the nurses at the end of S1 then others in camp, causing a vicious cycle of increasingly erratic behavior leading to less support etc culminates in his breakdown towards the end of the series.

Trapper My beloved boy ♥️ who has less of an arc and more of a vibe in existing canon, so we get to make some shit up whole cloth. Either keep the book/movie canon they were friendly in college, or make them childhood friends- not close, but some kind of pre-existing relationship. First episode is them stealing a jeep and bonding as they get into Shenanigans and Danger on their way to camp. Some people have the headcanon that Trapper lost a brother in WWII because of Wayne Rogers' acting choices, and I think a backstory like that could be interesting. He starts out a little ambivalent about the war, not wanting to be there and very aware of the human costs, but also feeling he has a duty. As he and Hawkeye get into more and more Situations trying to expose war crimes or fix injustices and even basic supply issues and are met by indifference or incompetence, he gets disillusioned. After Hawkeye's manic episode, he decided the one Actually Good thing he can accomplish is keeping his friend sane until they can get back home, since he starts to increasingly see his medical work as futile and the UN intervention as hopeless/harmful. They get closer and rely on each other more and more in S2, and in my based and gay pilled vision this is explicitly romantic and sexual, albeit with serious ambiguity if they would've had this relationship outside the trauma of war. Towards the end of S2, Trapper starts to get sick, and it turns out stress and increased alcohol & tobacco use contributed to an ulcer- it almost seems like he'll be sent home, but as in Classico MASH he begins treatment at the 4077th- and then Henry dies. Hawkeye spirals and they have to send him away, and then Trapper has to help pick up the increased work load. His symptoms get worse and he tries to cope and hide it, and develops peritonitis. When he realizes he's going to be evacced to Tokyo and then back to the States, he has a bit of a fucking meltdown. Mission Failed, he can't be there for his friend, and he blames himself because it was partly caused by his alcohol abuse. This is not just me being a Trapper simp, he has to go home before his enlistment is up for plot reasons since we no longer get the benefit of fuzzy timeline, and the genre convention of dramedy is you always Reap The Whirlwind at the worst possible moment.

BJ Ironically, I don't need to change anything about BJ to turn him into a dramedy character. He already has a "negative character arc", and you just take the major beats of that, set them in a linear escalation, and tighten them up. He starts out bright eyed and idealistic, determined to keep his head up, do his duty, and get out. Hawkeye meets him at the air field, having missed Trapper. Hawkeye blames himself for Trapper's health problems, and wants to do better by the new guy, offering him support and guidance. BJ bonds with him through the craziness, but as stress increases he starts acting out in small petty stochastic pranks, and then Peg's letters and missing his family build his anger, and he lashes out at Hawkeye because he suspects (in that "he's not right but he isn't wrong either" way) that Hawkeye's friendship isn't really because of BJ himself but because BJ is Trapper's Replacement. He suspects Hawkeye and Trapper were more than friends and he's simultaneously jealous and repulsed- he wants to totally replace Trapper and for Hawkeye to like him best, but he also loves Peg and misses her terribly and resents Hawkeye for "making" him want him. His chaotic unhinged repression is funny until it's briefly terrifying, then sad. As Hawkeye's mental health deteriorates, he tries to be supportive, but is ultimately overwhelmed by the intensity of Hawkeye's crisis and pulls back, though they mend things somewhat at the end.

The Hawkeye/Trapper/BJ Nexus In summary, our core duos are codependent trainwrecks, but while TrapHawk are more of an enabling and felonious "Thelma and Louise" style folie a deux, BJ and Hawkeye are more of an epic highs and lows "if you can't be with the one you love love the one your with" "hand in unlovable hand" mess.

Margaret Don't have nearly as much to say about our girl because I suck and have been writing this for almost 2 hours now because I'm insane but she has one of the best character arcs in MASH and Hypothetical Remake would really just intentionally start laying out her conflicts and growth from episode 1. She would also have more independent story arcs of trying to manage the nurses, and navigating advancing her career in the face of sexism. I would love to see her messy and complicated relationships with powerful men explored more fully. She bonds with Frank first to have a relationship where she's more in control than with her superiors, then as an ally to push back against the TrapHawk Chaos, then as she grows more confident (and TrapHawk get in over their heads) she is able to let go of the cloak of power military pretensions give her and be more herself.

Henry and Potter Henry remains a lovable incompetent. The one headcanon I have I'd like to use in Hypothetical Remake is that he's pretty severely dyslexic- I base that off his mispronunciations and malapropisms and canonical issues with reading (in Classico MASH doing things like holding a paper upside down or not being able to read maps and the words on them). He got through med school by having his wife read his textbooks out loud and type his papers, and brute force memorization. This is part of why he over relies on Radar to manage his paperwork and is easily scammed into signing off on things- he really can't tell what he's signing unless he uses all of his focus to decipher the text, and he's a trusting person so he rarely does. @marley-manson I LOVE your take that your ideal Potter is the exact same character in the show but the narrative treats him as an antagonist, and that is the vibe Hypothetical Remake would have.

Frank and Charles Again not a lot to say here, secondary characters and minor antagonists, but they would remain big sources of commentary but their pathos would be played up more in a dramedy.

Mulcahy Again, not too much different from canon, just more intentional building of a tragic arc. A smart sensitive guy who grew up poor and thought the church would be a path to respect or maybe even greatness got told to be a math teacher by his diocese, enlisted as a chaplain when the war broke out as part of his personal quest for meaning and significance, is confronted by the horrors and damage to innocent lives but still tries to believe in a greater purpose and good to what's happening, struggles with feelings of powerlessness and futility, and when he's finally able to do something heroic loses his hearing, which costs him his vocation- he's permanently disabled and would be unable to return to his old role as a parish priest/school teacher.

Recurring Characters Sidney my beloved ♥️ We bring back Sam Pak as a returning character. Also General Hammond and other members of the brass. I think Oliver could work really well as a recurring character.

Klinger Whole bundle of thoughts on this guy I wanted to save till the end. Because I adore Klinger, he's incredibly funny and one of the kindest and most principled characters on the show, and he's also incredibly 70s and I don't think could work as he was in a 21st century dramedy. I can see three potential paths to adapting him. A) Lean into the young, brash, hustler side of his personality, and he's a straight guy who thinks the craziest thing someone could do is wear a dress. B) An explicitly gay character who refuses to admit to being gay for a discharge because he finds the idea of being judged less than or broken for his sexuality incredibly offensive, but did drag back in Toledo and also refuses to stop being himself just because he got drafted. C) Principled pacifist serving as an orderly because of the draft who refuses to wear the uniform and started wearing dresses as a protest against bullying/abuse- oh, your gonna call me a sissy and steal my clothes because I refuse to use a gun? I will not only wear a dress, I will zhuzh it up into something amazing, because I would rather wear this outfit you intend to humiliate me with than that damn uniform.

[celiaelise]

Talked to one of my newer friends, who's...kind of a raging capitalist? They were like, "don't you think it's fun to learn how to make money?" And I was like, "no i kind of think capitalism is evil 😬" And they were saying how actors always deserve to get paid for their work, no one should work for free, because we need money to live. And I was like, "yeah I'm kind of with you, except I don't think we should need money to live. At the very least I think we should have UBI." (And then I explained what that was.)

And they were like, "yeah, but since a world where we don't need money to live isn't going to happen, actors should get paid." And started talking about how there's way more paying acting gigs than people realize, and you don't have to be famous to make a living acting. How you can get paid $400 a day (or an hour? idr) to play a dead body on a hospital show, and how you should view your acting as a business and yourself as a brand, etc.

Most of it was stuff I've heard before, but it was interesting to hear from someone who's kind of lived it, and who I agree with on a lot of other things. (Like the fact that no one should have to work as much as most people in the US do.)

What I didn't tell them, (partly bc we had reached the end of the 7 minute drive to my home) was that, like, yeah, all that's true, but, like. What if I don't want to? What if I don't want to play a dead body, or a crowd member? What if I don't want to BE a business??

Like, I genuinely appreciate this person's passion for, and belief in, acting, and their enthusiasm, and, like, the fact that they think I, or anyone else, could make that happen. But honestly, I'm not sure I could! And if I could, I'm not sure I'd enjoy it!

Plus, it's obvious that this particular person DOES enjoy the "business" aspect of it. AND, they DO already HAVE a well-paying, totally-unrelated-to-acting job! And they are able-bodied. Like, there's so many reasons why their "acting career plan" is just NOT accessible to so many people, not to mention that they clearly haven't had 100% success with it themselves! (Though to be fair, I haven't asked if they have a day job out of choice or necessity.)

Like, idk. It was interesting to talk about, and honestly kind of exciting to be told "if you love acting you can and should make a career out of it." In some ways, I DO want to grow my "acting career". I'd definitely be open to talking about it more with them, especially about their personal experience, but. I just don't think I'm gonna change my mind about the fact that being a full-time actor wouldn't be a good fit for me! (at least not unless i reached the level where i could pay other people to keep my life organized for me.)

Even before I got into theater, when I was considering trying to make a career as a visual artist, I settled on the fact that I don't have the discipline to be self-employed or work as a contractor. Whether you chalk it up to adhd or just who I am as a person, I struggle when left to my own devices, and benefit from external structure and routine. I really don't know if I'd survive without the structure and stability of a day job. Like, I am genuinely disabled. For whatever reason, many things that others do without even thinking about it are incredibly challenging to me.

And I know many other disabled actors! One of whom has literally said, "I think I really could make it in LA, in film or TV; I'm talented enough and I know my niche. But I can't move there and take that chance, because if things go bad and I end up on the streets, I will, quite literally, die."

Don't disabled actors also deserve to do what they love, even if they can't commit to "the grind"? (To be fair to the person I was talking to, they didn't use the phrase "the grind", but what they were describing sounded pretty similar.) And what about actors with children, or other responsibilities?

And, putting aside the fact that maybe I don't want to do 100 job interviews auditions a year, maybe I just actually want to have lines and a real character I can sink my teeth into! Does that make me, what, a snob? Maybe playing bit parts isn't really fun for me! What if I want to play roles outside of what Hollywood would view as my "niche"? Does that mean I don't love acting enough?? Also, I don't think there's anything wrong with me saying, "I actually just don't want to work that hard."

This person thought I was farfetched for positing a world where money isn't necessary for survival, but I think it's farfetched of THEM to suggest it's possible for everyone who loves acting to make a living doing it. (I kind of don't think they really believe that either, but it is the conclusion they implied.) If anything, I think our scenarios are equally unlikely.

[ithinkabouttzu]

Hello, do you still do requests for Stray Kids? If so, I'd like to request a Stray Kids ship.

Personality:

I'm reserved, patient, humorous. Also, quiet, sensitive, and a hopeless romantic. Occasionally, I feel insecure or overthink.

I'm a mix between introvert and extrovert (though, I'm mostly an introvert). To strangers, I seem aloof or shy. My friends describe me as trustworthy and kind.

Enneagram: 9w1

MBTI: ISTJ

Appearance:

My eyes are round, dark brown and height is 4'9". I have long, thick straight black hair and a round face. Also, my skin is lightly tanned. Both of my legs have a mole (birthmark) on them. And, I have a baby-face.

Hobbies: writing, drawing, reading, listening to music, playing video games, paper crafts

Likes: art, music, books, poetry, nature, animals, plushies, stars, ice skating

Love languages: acts of service, quality time

Ideal type:

Someone patient and a good listener. Confident, kind-hearted also loyal.

Additional fact about me:

- I have one dog

Thank you!

yes of course thank you for your request!! so sorry for the wait!!

I ship you with….

Bangchan!

song recommendation: Glue Song - Beebadoobee and Clairo

- First of all, I think this man would be OBSESSED WITH YOU

- Literally the first time you guys meet, he swears it’s love at first sight.

- He finds y’all’s height difference absolutely adorable. He loves it so much. He’ll never make any short jokes to tease you or anything like that (bc he knows what that’s like) but he’ll always give you a compliment on how cute you are to him.

- he loves spoiling you and taking care of you anytime he can. Giving you the best gifts, taking you on all sorts of extravagant trips, and doing it all with a big bouquet of your favorite flowers.

- You are his COMPLETE MUSE! I feel like he would definitely be the type to write you endless love songs. Literally the first time you guys met he’s already got ideas for his next song. Everytime he plays music, all he can think of is you.

- He’s definitely picking you up and carrying you with those big arms of his. (imagine the after workout pics that he’d definitely be sending you 😵‍💫)

- Whenever you start to feel insecure or overthink, he’s always gonna be there with open arms for you. He’s probably the best guy to talk to about these things. He’s always gonna validate your feelings no matter what

- He’s more than happy to be the extroverted one in your guy's relationship. He does love to see you reach out and be extroverted sometimes too though! He just knows how fun you can be and loves seeing that side show.

- The first time he ever saw your drawing he was amazed. He thinks you’re so talented. Every time you draw he will sometimes sit and watch you attentively doing it. He probs keeps one of your drawings in his back pocket just for funzies.

- Same for your paper crafts! He thinks those are the neatest things EVER

- I have the sweetest image of him, whenever you guys are together alone just hanging out, he’d love to sit there and draw a heart around your birthmarks, i know it sounds a bit silly but he’d have so much fun doing it haha.

- he’s playing with your dog just about every chance he gets, he thinks they’re the cutest thing ever

- Both of you really like animals, so I could definitely see you guys going to the zoo or something fun like that for a date!

- For your birthday or valentines, maybe even for your anniversary he’s probably going to write you the most heartfelt poem ever (tears would def be shed over it knowing him)

- He would find ice skating such a CUTE idea for a date. Like you helping him visibly struggle, while you’re gliding with ease on the ice

- HE WOULD LOVE PLAYING VIDEO GAMES WITH YOU!! You and him are for sure that one couple who stays up late into the night competing against each other on a game.

- You want someone who’s patient and good at listening? Listen up then, cause this guy would really be the best for you. You guys would really have the best time together all around, and I'm sure you’d make him the happiest person in the world!

I hope you enjoyed this lovely! You deserved it! 💗💗

[ancenth]

I think you should do all the numbers for the storytelling ask 💖

ELLE THAT'S SO MUCH thank you i love this

under the cut bc LONG

what’s the last screenshot you’ve taken for your story?

lol this one, but you've already seen it bc I haven't had time/energy to shoot more

describe your story in three words or less

im a wordy bitch so this is hard for me BUT let's go with: haunted by past (for gen 4)

describe (insert character here) in three words or less

I did an RNG with the characters listed on my character page and got Sapphire so: just a baby

how did you choose the name of your story?

In terms of the legacy name, I was thinking about last names for my white berry founder, and thought Mirror sounded cool, and I didn't really see it too often amongst other BPRs, so I went with it! In terms of each individual gen (gen titles can be found on the full story hub here!), some were named after the fact (Beginnings and Dreams), but I tried to choose names that reflected the overall story of the gen/what the biggest things are. So like, I feel like Beginnings, Dreams, and Nightmares are extremely on the nose after the fact, and tbh all the others are very on the nose too! Similar to how Dreams and Nightmares are kind of part one and part two of the Garden introduction arc, Mishaps and Shattered are also going to be part one and two of their own mini arc too :)

how do you choose your characters’ names?

Typically after things that suit the colors! But also some are based on things that suit their story/concept! For example, Jasper is orange like the stone, but also jasper the stone tends to represent protection/grounding and calming your troubles (in my very basic understanding) which I thought was a fun reference to his bella swan powers. I very occasionally hide things in names.

how long have you been working on your story for?

Oh man I started it in spring of 2020!!!!! It's been four and a half years, that's wild. I'm impressed I've gotten to gen 4 already, I never thought I'd get out of gen 2

whats the biggest risk you’ve taken with your story? did it pay off?

i feel like briefly killing Irus was a bit of a risk lol I wanted to scream that it was gonna be okay while I was posting that, but I feel like it paid off bc that scene turned out so amazing and I love how well I managed to pull it off

what about your story are you proud of?

See above!! I feel like in general I've gotten a lot better at writing as this has gone on! I also LOVE whenever I get to make gifs for my story, it's so fun

what about your story are you looking to improve on?

Still my writing/delivery of scenes lol I've gotten a lot better but I still struggle when writing certain conversations or fleshing out the plot points between A and Z. Like gen 2 was way too long winded, but then I feel like gen 3 was too short/I didn't expand on things enough

is your story fully planned or are you still working things out? is there a definitive end?

There is a definitive end! I don't have the entire thing fully written, but I have gen 4 set, 5 is mostly set, 6 is like 25%, and then the general concepts/maybe a few scenes of 7 8 and 9. I kind of think of gen 1 as it's own thing and then 2-6 as the first act, and 7-9 as the second act.

why have you decided to tell this story? are there any messages or meanings within it?

tbh it just started as my silly little berry sim story, and morphed into this giant supernatural monstrosity, so really it's just I'm having fun with it and getting to be creative :)

do you actually play the game or do you just use it as a storytelling medium?

haha noooo i definitely never play the sims.... but no like actually i do legitimately love playing this game, and you'd THINK that means I'd post more gameplay, but my problem with that is I either spend too much time taking screenshots and then barely make any progress, or I get too locked in and forget to take screenshots

from basic planning to a finished post, how long does that take you?

On average, it takes me like 30min to write the dialogue for a scene, and then maybe like 30min to actually shoot it (depending on the complexity/number of sims), and then like. 15 seconds per image for editing because I have a PSD and editing actions that I use to speed up the process, and then like maybe another 30min drafting the posts before I add them to my queue (which is taking longer now bc 50% of the time tumblr goes "oops! something went wrong!" when i try to upload a photo and it's driving me insane). Obviously things like making poses/gifs, or drawing in magic effects, or searching for hyper specific poses make it take longer!

do you have any regrets about your story so far? if you could go back in time, how would you fix these?

I really wish I was a better writer back when I killed Howlite! It feels very shoehorned in and like I just killed her for the sake of killing her which I absolutely hate and tbh kinda ruins gen 1 for me! but we're gonna have a Howlite backstory told in flashbacks eventually, so I'll hopefully get to right some wrongs

what have been the highlights of creating your story?

reactions from people!! obviously I love getting comments on my post, but I also love when I see someone clearly going through and catching up on the story and liking every post as they go lol

what about the process do you enjoy?

i looooovvveeeeee dropping little hints and foreshadowing in my story, i have a folder where I am keeping every single hint/reference I've ever made to a huge plot detail of gen 5 and I cannot wait to post it. this has been going on since 2020

what about the process do you hate?

uploading/queuing and also the fear at the back of my mind that one day tumblr is going to shut down and my magnum opus will vanish

choose a song that reminds you of your story

lol so i initially wrote the answer to the next one for this one before i saw what was below this so UHHH it's hard to narrow my story down to one song! I feel like each gen is such a different vibe. I'm gonna say gen 4 as a whole and go with Daffodil by Florence :)

choose a song that reminds you of (insert character here)

I'm doing all my heirs, so my picks for each gen (that I have playlists for so far) in order starting with Star are: 1. In Bloom - Neck Deep 2. Cowboy Blues - Kesha (this one is just kinda funny for Holly lol) 3. Sleep - MCR 4. I Will Follow You into the Dark - Death Cab (for Carn)/Rabbit Heart (Raise It Up) - Florence (for Yarrow) 5. The Archer - Taylor Swift 6. Family Tree (Intro) - Ethel Cain/Millstone - Brand New Plus a bonus Howlite song: Valley of the Dolls - Marina

choose your favourite shot from your story so far

ohhh there's a lot but lets go with these:

choose your least favourite shot so far

these bc some idiot (me) messed up the wall settings/made build mode errors. no joke i think about these all the time. they haunt me

choose a favourite character from your story so far

haha i have no idea who my favorite character is. not a single clue

choose your least favourite character so far

lotus bc i just irrationally hate him

are there any characters who remind you of yourself?

Holly when she's spiraling and overthinking and avoiding her problems lol also gen 5 and her caffeine addiction

what inspirations have you drawn on for your story?

definitely music a ton! I'll be listening to a song and then go "OH THAT COULD BE A FUN THING TO DO" and get an idea for a plot point. But also folklore and things! There was actually a pretty major piece of gen 3 that got cut at the last second because it was based on a folktale that was hyper specific to where I'm from, and I just ended up not being comfortable with posting that! Maybe one day I'll share what was meant to be, but no time soon

have other sim stories inspired you? 

yes!!! @tainoodles Fairyfloss BPR was the very first sims story I read and it made me get into berries and here we are :) and @simblrinterests Light Family BPR definitely pushed me to magic and supernatural things

what genres would you describe your story as?

Depends on the gen, but 1-3 definitely have that teen drama vibe, and then 2-the end is fantasy, and 4 is a bit dark academia

if you could reproduce your story in another medium (movie, novel, comic, etc.) what would you choose and why?

Possibly novel or graphic novel. I feel like a graphic novel could be fun bc I have a background in illustration and I'd get more visual freedom than I can achieve in the sims! As for a novel, it would be similar reasons! It is easier to describe things than it is to show them in the sims!

what would your story’s rating be? (G, PG, M etc.)

PG-13 maybe??? Maybe higher technically bc of swearing??

if you were leaving simblr and had to choose another creator to continue the story for you, who would you ask?

oh man I don't think I could ask someone to carry out this monstrosity. I'd probably just drop the links to my docs for people to read lol

drop some random trivia about your story

some of my favorite folder/scene names are "all according to keikaku (keikaku means plan)" "bella swan" "HOWLITE!!!!!!!!" "so..... we fucked up" "FUN-eral!" (tragically cut, that was Aster and Porcelain going to Pearl's funeral) "BRO ANSWER YOUR TEXTS" and in the scrapped gen 1 reboot "Rosalie energy" idk why I reference twilight so much

give a light spoiler

by sheer technicality, the gen 5 heir has already appeared in the story

recommend another creator’s story!

elle i know you're the one who sent this but for anyone else who has made it this far, pls go read the Labyrinth legacy by @lazarish, and ALSO the Dream legacy by @mmmatchasims

[brw]

this is ur chance to infodump abt aeon flux bc i have no idea what it is

okay. overview is. it's an animated MTV show that aired in the early to mid 90s (91–95) with very heavy inspirations from anime (the creator is korean-american i believe) and german expressionism. it runs on literally nothing but pure, hard vibes. the title character dies in every episode of the second season and only season 3 has feature length, voice-acted episodes. it has incredibly progressive discusses of gender and depictions of sexuality for its time that are nicely casual.

it follows æon flux, an assassin from the neighbouring city of monica where everyone dresses like hellfire gala (that's the comics not stranger things) patrons. what she's doing is always left ambiguous but she moves like a freak and looks like a freak and i love her so much. once she tries to backflip off a ladder and lands flat on her face and looks so embarrassed and i love her. I love her so so so much. the only other properly consistent character is trevor goodchild, her boytoy / fascist dictator boyfriend she's sometimes beating the shit out of. trevor is terrible and i love him dearly. he reminds me of the post someone made praising arcane for having sneaky, manipulative but physically weak men and aggressive, violent physical woman. that's trevor and æon all over.

the thing is. i cannot describe most of the most iconic scenes without it sounding like a porn parody of itself. and i say that will so much love but woof. there is like... this scene where æon wants eggs and goes through her fridge (the only thing other than the egg container is a cooked chicken btw) and there aren't any eggs so she looks around and finds her Trevor, who is a literal dictator war criminal, curled up into this tiny cupboard and eating raw eggs off the floor of it nude in a collar. and that scene lasts for all of 15 seconds and im still struggling to decipher it. trevor literally killed æon in the prior episode but now he's here. nude and eating her eggs uncooked and slurping them from the floor of this fucking cupboard. and this happens a lot so you can appreciate why describing the content of the episodes is difficult because i genuinely go "hey wait a minute. what the fuck" a LOT but it makes it super fun.

They made a more SFW, linearly told movie with Charlize Theron and objectively it's terrible but I'm kind of obsessed with it. The costume and set design is GORGEOUS and while he's extremely generic looking Trevor does at least seem like he would eat raw eggs nude so there's that.

anyway until season 3 all the episodes are like 5 minutes long (maybe watch the 12 minute one afterward bc the end is uh super fucking weird) and even season 3 is like 20 something minutes so. if this at all interests you. consider viewing it i have A Legal Link pinned now so i can convince more people 🫡😁😁

[mikomikono]

hi miko! im here with a fic writing question… i was thinking about how to make smut good bc recently i feel like whenever i get to the smut part of the fic im writing i get super bored, like im just rehashing whatever ive been writing in every smut scene ive done for years. you and endles came to mind bc i always find your guys nsfw scenes really compelling, and great, and unique. while also being hot and fun (very important w smut!!) so i wanted to ask if you had any tips for keeping things exciting or fresh when you are tackling those scenes! especially because you guys have experience writing the same characters many times over and manage to be so creative and distinct with every scene ive read from you. so, i guess, penny for your thoughts, if you feel like it! (sorry for sending this only to you and asking for both your opinions, it was the simplest 😭. if u want to answer yourself only thats fine haha)

❤️

Heyyyy oh my god I never expected to become someone ppl would come to for writing advice, what an honour 💖 also, I hope you don't mind me answering publicly, bc I feel like this is something a lit of writers struggle with! I will put it under a cut tho, bc I ended up writing quite a bit oops

So. Smut. It's kinda funny you should ask me about that, bc the first proper sex scene I ever wrote was last year for Steamship Sexcapades (bc I am not counting that one feeble attempt at 19 that was so cringe that I hid it away and didn't even think about trying again for like 8 yrs) but I suppose after writing *checks The Canon word count* a lot since then means something :DD

Here's the thing: I also feel like I'm rehashing things. Constantly. There's only so many ways you can say "cock in hole ➡️ thrust" before you're gonna have to repeat some phrases. And honestly, I feel like I repeat phrases remarkably often! But in a way that's all writing! (or that's how I stop myself from getting too depressed about it lol) The readers don't notice! Usually. And as long as you don't use the exact same wording every single time.

Ok, so here's a few tips on what I, personally, think you need to make a good sex scene:

Don't be afraid of the words. Y'know, the first time I wrote "half-hard cock" I (allegedly) had to take a 10min break and texted a friend that I was not going to be able to do this. But after a while you sort of get used to it and the words that seemed embarrassing stop being that, and become just... Words. And you also shouldn't shy away from more "cringe" words! Sometimes its fun to be a little cringe!

Related, you should try to love the words. But that's just good general writing advice, I feel.

Describe the emotions. Most people feel... something towards those they are intimate with, and that should be true in erotica too. It should be especially true in erotica, I think! Even if it's a one night stand, strangers who met in the club 5mins ago, whatever... You want the characters to feel.

Don't forget the physical. This is a thing that might seem a bit... weird. Like, you're writing sex, how could it not be physical? But what I mean is that you shouldn't forget to describe how it feels to the people involved, most notably your POV character. It's very easy to get lost in describing what they're doing and completely forget to get into the actual feeling. You're not writing a sex manual! And I have read fics where half way through I realise that's what it sounds like.

It's never just about the sex. Even if you think it is, it's not. It's about the connection, the narrative, the characterisation... It's about showing something that you can only show through the kind of vulnerable intimacy that sex scenes provide. Even if it's a oneshot pwp, it still has something to say. Maybe that something is wanting to get your rocks off, but also we're talking about fanfiction... We don't read and write that just to get off. It's always about the characters.

Rehashing is fine, actually. As I said, there's only so many ways to describe certain things, and so many ways you can have sex. Except that's not really true, because the secret to keeping it fresh is mixing it up! You can change positions, you can change who's the top/bottom, you can add foreplay (you should) and then change what kind of foreplay you wanna have! You can look into kinks! You can change locations! (I know we've done that a lot) You can add or remove any number of things to make each individual encounter different! And that's the key: repetition is fine, so long as you don't use the exact same everything every time. Case in point, there is a tumblr post which I would link except I'm on mobile, that is titled sth like "list of vocal sounds for smut", which has a list of, well, sounds/verbs (moan, groan, hiss, whimper, whisper etc) and adjectives that could be paired with them (hoarse, needy, quiet, throaty, desperate, wanton etc). The point is, that the best way to keep from sounding repetitive is to mix and match the words so that even if you say "groan" five times in 5k words, it's a different kind of groan every time. The same applies to sex acts! Do you have any idea how much cock Ryunosuke has sucked during The Canon? A lot. But it doesn't feel repetitive (hopefully) because everything else around it is switched up.

And perhaps most importantly: you gotta be at least a little horny for it yourself. I get it, man, writing smut is weird. You sit in front of your computer, staring at the monitor like "hmm is it better to use the word cock or dick or member?" And like... That's not very sexy. But! But!!! At the end of the day you gotta write something that makes you excited! Otherwise what's the point? Why are you writing if it doesn't fulfill you on some level??

Anyway, that's just my thoughts on the matter. If you want more specific help with writing, you can always DM me, I don't mind~

Also, endles says she is too mentally exhausted to properly answer, but she seconds everything I said, especially the point about loving the words. Actually she really wants to say sth about that, so I'm paraphrasing her for the rest of this:

You, as a writer, should love language. You should love the neat little things that language can do and seek out new things to try every time. It's a journey of discovery! Just like sex is always a new journey, even if it's the same characters and the same sex acts, every individual time is a chance to find something new. Let yourself have fun! Write something really stupid and work from that. The way I create scenes by writing jokes, even for serious scenes, because sex at the core is kinda funny. You're standing naked (at least partially) in front of this other naked person and it makes you feel a bit funny.

Also concrete advice: pick a list of 5-10 words you want to use. They can be anything, verbs, nouns, adjectives, as long as you really, really vibe with them, because they make you happy, as long as they're not words you already use a lot. They can also all relate to the same theme if you want! And then find a way to put all those words in.

[ranboo5]

reminds me of people saying wilbur (lovejoy) it's like its their last names. just like tumblr url

Yeah that I think is fun honestly like . Okay to compare it to a nimisin in post

FUCK I JUST ACCIDENTALLY DELETED A WHOLE PARAGRAPH FUCK MY LIFE. Whatever

Anyway toki pona, the gibberish I've been intermittently posting in, is a philosophical experiment of a conlang where, due to a restricted vocabulary and simple but restricted grammar, invoking any concept is an exercise in (as described by unofficial spokesperson/Renaissance jan/famous variety YouTuber jan Misali) not knowing what the "word for it" is but describing what it is in essential, contextual terms. It's a context-dependent ad-hoc descriptive process and it can be unwieldy fuzzy and sometimes bad for communication in novel ways sure but it's actually much more powerful and capable than people expect – I would say that toki pona doesn't have /more/ things it struggles to communicate than a natlang like English does, it just struggles with different ones – and many things that are hard to comprehensively express in English are easier to invoke in toki pona!

But yeah sometimes it can be hard. So sometimes ppl will introduce nimi sin, literally "new words" (loaned into English as "nimisin"), to describe some things.

These are. Debatable in value. I use "powe" (a nimisin) several times in the meta bc it affords me a greater agility w/ which to discuss the concept of fiction – I'm not sure if this is a decision I'll stand by as I get better expressing things in toki pona, but for now it seems to be good for my uses there

There are some nimisin though that are less convincing imo – "isipin", "thought," is the main one I wanted 2 compare this whole thing to

I really don't like "isipin." In toki pona there is no simple way to express the concept of thinking – and if you try to describe it that's because you aren't actually talking about things that necessarily belong in the same semantic grouping! Trying to analyze what you mean when you say "thinking" is really interesting – the different phrases people can come up with on that front are often more useful than just "thinking"!

"pilin" for gut feelings "mi la" for when smth is in your opinion "nasin mi" for moral codes "lukin" for examination "alasa sona" for investigation or exploration "kama sona" for learning "toki insa" for internal monologue "toki lawa" "lawa pilin" "Pali sona" and so much more – it communicates and helps you acknowledge what angle you're actually coming at something from. It's really interesting and a great thought exercise

"isipin" eliminates that exercise. You just say "isipin" and you skip over identifying and communicating what kind of consideration you're talking about, yk?

And that's how I feel about "content" and "content creator," I think, having evaluated it. We use these phrases as shorthand for... what, at this point? What are you talking about when you say "content"? Do you mean to say "art?" "Entertainment"? "Comedy"? "Presentation"? "Simulacra of companionship"? Do you mean a specific work of theirs? What do you actually like about things? And like ... at risk of somehow sounding even more pretentious than I already have, I think that's worth considering sometimes. What do you actually come here for? "Content" describes nothing. "This game contains scenes." And that can be useful as a term sometimes, sure, but like... idk . Actually citing what people do or perform is cool I think . And not to say that's not also a shorthand it v much is but like . Idk maybe we could all do to choose what shorthand we use more deliberately

[save-the-villainous-cat]

Okay, so sorry ahead in advance for the essay. I don't know if ur audience is really interested in this topic, or if you yourself are but i am tired and my filter is off. So I'm just gonna ramble Abt pas de deux.

Anyways, this is mainly coming off from the fact that I find classical music CRIMINALLY underrated. However, I'm so happy to see Pas Des Deux get appreciated the way it is. There's something ethereal about the song. I firmly believe that music isn't only to be used in entertainment but also to envoke feels that may be otherwise hard to express. Music feels like a universal language, whether or not you know how to play instruments or understand the lyrics. Imo, pas de deux is one song that HITS it on the nail.

There's something about the song which touches on intimate feelings, of yearning and wanting and comfort. The lower string instruments bringing a warmth, where as flutes and the harp bring in an innocence. The way Tchaikovsky layered the instruments to not only build upon eachother but let the story stay woven thru the transferring melodies. Admittedly, I'm very emotional myself, but over music? It's difficult.

Like i said before, music is there to envoke feelings to the audience, to bring joy or comfort. A lot of lyrical songs and pieces do it easily so, and they could be powerful. There's nothing more heartbreaking than to listen to a lover sing about her gray days without her spouse or of children singing about their innocent world. Even with some instrumental pieces, some specific feelings are easy to bring out, and that's honestly my favorite part about music.

What stood out to me for a song like pas Des Deux is the way it brings in so many feelings. Yes, there's a main story the ballet follows. However, even outside of the ballet plot, there's something so unique about the song, in the way that it feels as if it's touching innocence, yearning, the way someone might seek comfort of to their close ones. The listener just doesn't have to interpret it one way. Between the climax, to me, it sounds like separation of family, of heartbreak and loneliness and despair. And as soon as the music gets the angst with the brass instruments, the strings and the woodwinds lift it, like hope or comfort.

The ending is absolutely beautiful too. The song leaves such an otherworldly feeling. I've literally cried at how beautiful it is, it's just one of those things. No matter if you're in the most comfortable place in your life or struggling. The music just.../feels/ like your heart and your head. There's something about the song that just makes me feel human, makes me feel alive. Sometimes, it feels comforting as if it's calling a feeling deep beneath that i can't describe. Other times, it makes me realize how comfortably I live and even helps bring peace. Idk man, just one of my favorite songs.

Anyways, i don't know much about Tchaikovsky s history nor the song's. I just wanted to rambling about music whilst sleep deprived for anyone interested bc this is a topic that's been following me for weeks of not months, the beauty of music <3 and how i find pas des deux one of the BEST songs in the entire existence for myself. There's something about that song just feels insanely human, insanely close to our feelings.

Sorry for the repetition c

I pretty much grew up with classical music because a lot of famous composers are from Germany/Austria, so it was like part of Kindergarten and school to listen to them here and there and go to concerts where an orchestra played those. (One of my teachers fell asleep during one of those concerts and we’ve made fun of that for ages lmao.)

But I have to say, Russian composers hit different. (I think in general Russian media is insane and I personally blame that on Russian history…)

However, my favourite will always be Erik Satie’s Gymnopédie no. 1.

[ahungeringknife]

Hey! It’s the Noornoon fanatic again here to say the fic you recently posted was FANTASTIC! I loved it so much, I cant even begin to describe it. I adore his relationship with Omnigul and how you portray her (I always adored her but no one ever pays attention to her!) Kinox gets such a wonderful portrayal in your world and AHHHHHHH! (It’s hard to even write what I wanna say bc I’m just so enthused rn!) Thank you so much for sharing your writing and making my day, I always look forward to your work! (If you did something Omnigul and Crota centered, exploring her character as someone who has earned her name as an Osmium via his admiration for her but struggles to get respect for that title, I would actually dissolve) Keep up the incredible work!

Thank you! Noornoon is def my fave Hive OC other than Gup (who is my precious lil guy) but Noornoon is a Hive. Idk if I'll ever go into Omnigul specifically because I'm more interested in Kinox and Noornoon but she'll def be around. I do have some other stuff planned involving Sav and Xivu and Noornoon courting Kinox and some saucy stuff *cough*. Idk when I'll get a chance to write it though.

But I will leave you with this since idk when I'll ever post it elsewhere it's SO short.

--

Kinox hung with her sisters like wraiths in a belfry watching the show down below. While not their sister in blood Ginak was their sister in carnage. She had put on a play before the brood was to start their assault on Ti’avo, a world that was long overdue for plucking. The assembled Hive hummed along with the words and the songs, allowing for those without eyes to more easily build up a view of the world around them as the sound echoed through their horns and thick skulls to paint perfect images in their minds in the color of sound.

Tigri leaned over to Kinox at the end of the song and the butchering of both thrall and citizens of Ti’avo began. The thrall screamed in delight, almost ecstasy. The Ti’avo screamed in pain and horror. “You have an admirer,” Tigri said softly to Kinox.

“Hmm?” she looked away from the stage and Ginak’s wonderful gruesome sight. “What?”

Tigri tilted her head to press their horns together and Kinox could see what she could see. The shapes and colors of the music reverberating through them and overlapping with her own echolocation vision. And there down on the ground she noticed a member of the congregation kept looking back and up into the belfry; right at her. She scoffed, “Just an Acolyte stunned Crota’s daughters attend such a low brow play,” she told Tigri. But that was what they loved about Ginak’s work. It was, in a word, quite trashy.

“Perhaps,” Tigri said. “Could be fun though. If you don’t want them I’ll surely take them.”

Kinox growled at her sister. “They obviously have eyes and its why they prefer me,” she bit out at Tigri who only giggled. “Once the show is over. I will see this Acolyte.”

Tigri teased her, jabbing her with her claws, “May they worship you eternal.”

Kinox shoved her sister aside and only because the play was still going on did she was inflict further violence on Tigri. It was almost a curse! She was a daughter of Crota, grand daughter of Oryx, descended from Gods. As if a measly little Acolyte could tempt her bite.

[bratbarzal]

have you ever heard that tik tok audio thats like. “Naw…… this cant be 😟😟😟😟” because i just finished your luke series and thats literally me.

YOU ACTUALLY GOT ME SO GOOD LIKE ANGST HURT NO COMFORT NO HAPPY ENDING WAS THE LAST THING I WAS EXPECTING. i closed out of the third part to see the (3/3) chapter marker on the masterlist and was like Ok so i have to be hallucinating this 😊😊😊 i fear i was Not. you shouldve seen the look on my face when i read the last line and was hit with the authors note and not the fun happy time where they smile and kiss and make up like i was expecting. i was gagged…. ur an evil mastermind i cant help but applaud

i was reading through lukes stupid stupid convo with cole (lmfaooo sidenote i love the way u wrote cole in this hes actually so funny. luke straight up slandering her dragging her name through the mud and all and cole being like Ok well idgaf tho ❤️ … i know my goat.) and i actually had to close the app. luke was on some real “oh my goodness valentine” levels of airballing i had to look away 😭😭😭😭

ok anyway i just wanted to say that i enjoyed your series So so so much i cant even begin to describe it!!!!!!!!!!!! readers characterization was sooooo good i absolutely love when authors give the reader so much depth the way u did it made the last chap that much more heart wrenching 💔💔💔💔 her struggles and insecurities were sooooo realistic like after 51k words thats not just a fictional character to me thats my Girl….. and her relationship development with luke Omfg😭😭 i need a shirt that says “I SURVIVED THIS FANFIC SITUATIONSHIP” they both drive me up ghe wall (affectionately). their banter was sooooo fun to read through and they were just both so silly and cute!! in my heart they came to their senses.

i sat through the whole series in one sitting anf enjoyed every single moment of it. your world building was incredible and you have such a way with describing emotions i felt it all in my soul lowkey….. u have such a talent and have really blessed the reader fic tag. fics with no use of y/n and amazing writing is genuinely crack to me i cant even being to thank you enough. this series was a gift!!!!! a gift i tell you. youre an incredible writer thank u for sharing ur work ❤️

I LOVE THIS KIND OF ASK SO MUCH THANK YOU FOR SENDING THIS TO ME LMAO

I saw this this morning and it put me in a good mood all day had to wait until I finished work to give this the attention it deserves lol

the way I was originally going to release it as just 1/1 and it got too long when I posted the first part I was like... how much should I warn people here but I feel like you have to go through the journey of the whole fic without knowing where it's going that was the whole fun of it lmao

in my original draft of the Luke/Cole convo I had Cole being like ok bet and then I was like no that's stupid as much as we didn't see his side he technically spent his whole summer pining after a girl he isn't just gonna drop that bc Luke told him to hahaha - I thought making it so he was like that sounds like a you problem I'm gonna carry on doing what I do was too funny not to do it 😭 he gives me such unbothered vibes while Luke is there pure spiralling

thank you so much!!! that really is our girl!!! I love adding characterisation and figuring out how to toe the line between having people have real emotions and reactions and still trying to make people understand where they're coming from and be on their side!! it was the same with Luke like how do I make him fuck up so bad that she can't carry on but still make you feel for him in the end I spend way too much time in my head about it all tbh

thank you so so much for sending this really it means the world to me that you read it and felt the urge to even message this it really makes me feel massively valued and it's great to know you enjoyed it and that you loved the little things about it!!!