#i wanna just be held in someones arms and be given soft tickles so i forget abt the world around me

[slimeylee]

m sadge

-slime

[navibluebees]

Someone to be Proud of (Recom Quaritch x Female Human Reader) - Part 4

Please read before interacting.

Here again with cutie Quaritch. Living in my fantasy world where he might actually turn out to be a decent person. I suppose we'll see. No warnings for this one. & Thank you guys for the support.

When Miles woke up, he felt your arms tight around him. In the night, he had shifted to his back and you were curled up on top, clutching him close. This morning, they were supposed to head out with Spider and go to the ikran. Their goal was to gain their own flying mounts for more adaptability in the land. He just wasn’t going to get up yet. He was pulled back from his thoughts by soft lips kissing under his jaw. They traveled up under his ear, your nose tickling him and his ears swiveling to get away. 

You sat up, stretching your arms up, legs hugging his sides. He eyed your body ardently before shutting down that train of thought. No time now. Gotta go. He played with your hair, moving it back from your face to see you grinning pleasantly at him. “Good morning, beautiful.”

You tipped your head down to his, pressing a quick kiss to his lips. “Good morning, Miles. What’s on the agenda today?”

“Away from you, unfortunately. Going to get my own banshee today!”

You searched through your thoughts quickly, pulling up an image of a brightly colorful flying animal. “Oh! That sounds exciting. But I’ll miss you.” You pouted cutely and he groaned in frustration.

“Don’t do that. I’ll stay with you all day if you keep doing that.”

“I know! Its part of my ultimate plan to keep you with me always.”

You burst into a fit of giggles as he held you tightly, flipping you over and eagerly kissing you all over your face, neck and chest. He paused, giving you both a moment to catch your breath. “You have no idea how badly I’d love to do that, doll. But I gotta go. The kid is going to show us the way and I wanna get to know him better. Maybe earn his trust. It definitely won’t be easy.”

Your hands cupped his face and he sagged, feeling the weight of the world on his shoulders. “Please be safe, honey. And make sure you take a battery replacement for Spider’s air pack in case you’re out for a while.”

“Honey? I like that. And will do. Thank you for the reminder.” He kissed your forehead and pulled on clothes quickly to head out the door. He tucked you in the blankets and kissed you once more before going on an adventure.

~~~

Miles was given an air mask for Spider with a tracker in it and proceeded to pass it off to Spider informing him to not run away or it would take them no time to track him and pull him back. It wasn’t fully freedom, but it was something. They got on the chopper and he gave a thumbs up to signal everyone was ready to go.

~~~

They made their way to the banshees careful of the Hallelujah Mountains, weaving in and out of them expertly. Once they got dropped off, they readied their weapons and pulled out the tranquilizer to knock out the banshees so they could link. A laugh cut through the quiet.

“Are you kidding me? That’s not the way. The Omaticaya face their banshee for the honor to ride. I’ve seen kids do it with their bare hands.”

Miles was disconcerted by Spider’s judgment and asked, “Did Jake Sully do it the traditional way?”

“What do you think?”

Determined to beat Jake and not shame himself in front of Spider, he went forward, readying to face the one that would choose him. A few hopped away but he came to one that tilted its head and stared him down. He hissed at it and it screamed back at him. “Let’s dance, cupcake.” He tackled the banshee, wrapping his arms and legs around it. It flailed and threw him around, but still he held on.

“Oh, did I forget to mention? They usually wrap the mouth first.”

“Nice, kid!” Were the last words he yelled out before tumbling over the side. He fought away the rage, clinging as tightly as he could, the banshee swooping through the air and flipping around in the sky. “Fucking stay still, dammit!” He grabbed it around the neck, tightening his arm, and reached back with the other hand to grab his queue. With the arm around its neck he reached his hand to steady the queue of the banshee and it was nothing short of a miracle when he finally connected the two. “Stop thrashing around!” The banshee stopped and Miles moved to sit behind its neck. 

He flew up and saw his team turning to walk away.  When they saw him, smiles grew across their faces, even Spider’s, he noted pleased. “Yeah, that’s right!” He yelled. “Who’s next??”

~~~

After everyone had won their banshees, Miles called down to the chopper to let them know that they were going to head back. Spider rode with him and taught him a bit more of the language, specifically different sounds that were only in the Na’vi language. 

“Hey, kid uh you’re pretty good with this language.”

Spider faced forward, quiet for a moment. “Thanks. It’s what happens when you grow up with it.”

Miles recoiled mentally, feeling guilt and wondering if it was even his to bear. He stayed silent for the rest of the flight.

~~~

After they’d landed, their banshees flew away but remained close to be called if necessary. They flew up and perched on the tallest machines, workers gaping in awe at the new addition to the base. They went in to report to General Ardmore. She waved them into the meeting room, a giant map pulled up. A signal had been picked up from an unassigned chopper, going to a large set of islands. Lots to search, but it felt like the right place to continue looking for Sully.

~~~

When Miles got back to his room, he was exhausted. He pushed open the door to his room and saw you in bed reading. He laughed because you were sitting there, blankets pulled around you and up over your head, so all he could see was light glowing on your face from the tablet. “Miles!” You stood up on the bed and made to step off to go to him when your foot caught in the blanket and you started to fall forward.

“Woah, you’re falling for me pretty hard, huh?” He had rushed forward to catch you in his arms, carefully untangling your foot. You wound your arms around his neck and he pulled your leg around him, so you tightened both at his waist. He walked you to the wall, feeling bold and pressed you against it. He leaned into your mouth, kissing you. Thrilled, you sighed into his mouth and tugged him closer. He smiled and kissed down your neck, resting his cheek on your chest. He let your heartbeat calm him and then went to put you on the bed and sit down beside you.

“Stop!!”

He paused, mid squat to sit and looked at you, mildly grumpy. “Why in the world are you stopping me?”

“No outside clothes on the bed. Take em off.”

“Ahh. I see what you want. I get it.”

“Nope. I just need clean sheets.” 

You grinned at him and he rolled his eyes. “Alright, alright. I’ll go shower but you better be awake when I get back. I wanna tell you about my day.”

After a quick shower and run back to his room, he had pulled on a pair of shorts and lifted the blankets to come close to you. He paused with one knee on the bed. “What are you wearing?” 

“Your shirt!! It comes past my knees, but it’s so comfy and I didn’t feel like going back to my room for pajamas. I hope that’s okay.”

“Of course, sweetheart.” His face tinged a deeper blue as he sat in beside you, pulling you close. “Okay, so I got my own banshee today! The guys joked about me calling it Cupcake permanently, so I guess that’s its name until I make up a different one.”

You nodded, listening fully to his story and he continued, encouraged. “Spider even seemed excited by it! Then he rode back with me and taught me some more about the language. I think I’m really getting the hang of it.”

“Oh, honey. I’m so proud of you.”

His ears swiveled to you and his brow crinkled as he looked at you. “What? Miles, what is it?”

“It’s just been a long time since I heard that. And.. it means a lot coming from you. From someone who believes in me.”

You sat together in the silence, holding him tight. A minute later he spoke again. “Tomorrow, we’re going to head out again. I think we’re closer to Sully. We’re going to a boat that’ll be taking us around so we can talk to the clans in that area and see if they’re hiding him.”

You frowned, unsure what this all entailed. “Is there anything I need to worry about, Miles? You’ll stay safe?”

“Nothing.  And always, doll. Of course.”

Satisfied, you snuggled down and against him. He wrapped around you but couldn’t sleep. What would you do if you knew what he had done in the past? Maybe you could forgive him, but what about now? The stuff he’d done already in this body. Taking kids hostage would normally put him off, but this was Sully. He needed to be taken down. Didn’t he? Isn’t that what the mission was about? Sully would do anything for his kids. He wondered if he would ever feel the same about Spider. Or if he was even worthy enough to be called ‘Father’.

***

Taglist:

@drinking-tea-and-be-obsessed

[nczaversnick]

How Cuddleable Are Your OCs?

Saw @melpomene-grey do this and wanted to give it a go

Rules: Rate your OCs on a scale of 1 to 10 based on how likely they are/how good they are at cuddling

My answers in green, Rachelle’s in purple. Her answers are way better than mine XD8

Adrian:

3/10 for willingness but 7/10 for skill. He's incredibly touch starved awkward about physical contact, but should you get any, he's very solid and protective, when he's asleep, he radiates heat

1/10 for wanting to cuddle, but I imagine he's a 7/10 when it comes to cuddling because he's tall, so he'll be the perfect big spoon. Plus he's a fire elemental, so he'll be naturally a little warmer, and he smells like a gentle campfire when he's calm. He would get higher marks if he was actually comfortable with holding people rather than being held. #cuddledprincess

Caspian:

8/10 great hugger. It's very comforting. It's no surprise he's an excellent nurse

8/10 for wanting to cuddle, but it has to be from a certain someone. Everyone else would probably be a 4/10. Cuddling is an intimate thing for him, something he's not really used to and thinks it should be reserved for people he's intimate with. (Lack of affection will do that to you) 8/10 for actually cuddling. He's small enough for *someone* to place his head on top of while being able to wrap his arms around him. The perfect small spoon. Plus he would smell like sweet salt laffy taffies when he's calm.

Aurelia:

10/10, there is nothing this woman can not fix with a hug

8/10 for wanting to cuddle if she knows you and cares about you, 10/10 when it comes to actually cuddling. She's soft, she's got a little body squish that tickles if you squeeze her a little too much, and she smells like sweet honey when she's calm.

Quinn:

3/10 Awkward as fuck

4/10 for cuddling?? They're so awkward about people crying in front of them and then trying to comfort them would be a pat on the shoulder and a "that's rough, buddy". Frankly, you put them on the spot and they weren't prepared, so it's really your fault. 4/10 for actual cuddling. Quinn isn't an affectionate person, they're awkward and they have sweaty palms.

Iris:

4/10 It’s unlikely but if you manage to score a hug it’s a quick one, she’s got other stuff to do

4/10 of wanting to cuddle, it's not that she doesn't want to, it's just cuddling is such a long activity to do, she would rather give you a warm hug, pat on the back and then get back to work. 5/10 for cuddling? She's muscular, which isn't a bad thing, it just might not be as soft, her cybernetics can get cold, and like I said, she would probably rush the cuddle.

Athena:

8/10 much like Caspian, a very compassionate individual

Secretly Athena would absolutely love to cuddle with everyone (not everyone, but you know,her friends) 10/10, but she acts like she doesn't want to 4/10. She's not super great at making you feel better, but you can see she's trying, so it's a nice gesture. For actual cuddling... She's a tiny bit taller than Caspian, but she'll always insist on being the big spoon. It's nice to be held by someone, maybe even a bit adorable. She would also smell like sweet salt laffy taffies. She'll get bored though and start to tickle/wrestle with you though. 7/10

Mason:

1/10 The chance is low but never zero. Hugs are reserved for only the most dire of circumstances

1/10 for wanting to cuddle. It's not something that's wired into him. He was starved of affection, so of course reciprocating it would be nearly impossible. *However* I believe this man would be a god at cuddling, if given the chance. Dare I say on par with Adrian. He's massive, he's older so his muscles aren't as tough, but they still make you feel protected. He doesn't smell, no matter how sweaty he gets. (I haven't thought of what air deviants would smell like) And he has big hands. (That doesn't matter, but I just thought that would be a detail people would wanna know)

Tagging @honeybewrites @the-golden-comet @ath3alin +open tag

[fluffymcu]

How about y/n is in a playful mood so she decides to wrestle Bucky as an attempt to get his attention. Both him and Peter were playing on the PlayStation and she accidentally made him lose the game. Bucky growls in frustration then grabs her and pulls her onto his lap then attacks her with tickles. Teasing her for being an attention seeker.

“But what you don’t know, Spider boy, I’ve been practicing. You’re not winning against me anymore!” Bucky tittered, pride swelling in his chest from all the hours he’d secretly practiced Mario Kart while Peter was at school.

“Bucky!!“ you whined loudly, leaning your head and arms on the backrest of the couch. You wanted him to hang out with you today. You were bored and everyone else was busy so you wanted to be with him.

“I’m playing, y/n/n.” He said, not taking his eyes of the screen. You growled and got up to circle the couch and stand next to him.

“Bucky I’m bored!” You whined. You knew you were acting childish but… you really didn’t care. You stood in front of him, blocking his view and he quickly stood up as to not fall off the road in the game.

“Y/n/n move. You’re in the way.” He tried to bump you out of the way but you were determined to stay.

“No. I’m bored.” He didn’t take his eyes off the screen.

“Ooh! Knocked you off!” He laughed at peter, who now was groaning in annoyance of being put in 6th place now.

Bucky won the game standing up, and he cheered and rubbed it in letters face. Your hopes skyrocketed because now this would mean that he was all yours now, right?

“Best 2 out of 3!” Peter yelled. Your eyes widened as your body slumped.

“You’re on!” Bucky laughed, starting to sit down. You quickly beat him to the seat and sat on his spot. He turned to look at you and you crossed your arms and smirked. “Ha!” You smiled. Bucky scoffed amd chuckled at you. “You think I care that you’re sitting there?” He teased, crouching down and starting to sit on you. You began to scream and slap at his back, making him bust out laughing and stand back up. You kicked his butt as he stood, making his take a step forward. “Ohohow.” He laughed.

“Buckyyyy I wanna play.” You whined.

“Then get a controller.” He said, pointing at the basket of ps4 controls.

“Nooo I don’t wanna play PS4!” You cried, throwing your head back. Bucky started another round and mindlessly picked you up and sat in your place. You sucked your teeth and crossed your arms as they began playing again. You hopped back on the couch next to him and began to shake his shoulders to get his attention. “Bucky pleeeease. I wanna plaaaay! I’m so bored, everyone else has something to do with someone but me!” You frowned.

As the round went on, you were relentlessly shaking, poking, and wrestling Bucky. You were surprised at his patience, or maybe he was just too engrossed in the game. Probably the latter. You had Bucky in a headlock and pulling down, to try to wrestle his to the ground but of course he was pretty strong and was able to stay upright.

It was until you covered his eyes with your hands and pulled him down, that he couldn’t see and he fell off the rainbow bridge and lost the game. He could only tell by peter’s victorious cheer that he dropped the controller and ripped your hands away. He stared at the screen in disbelief and groaned. “No!!” He growled and grabbed you from behind him and laid you on his lap. “Ooh, you little attention hog! You got my attention now, is that what you wanted?!” He asked, mercilessly attacking your sides, squeezing and digging his fingers up your ribs and armpits, not paying any mind to your screams of protests.

“AHHH! HAHAHAHAAHAAAA! BUCKYYYY!!” You screamed, rolling around in his lap. You should have seen this coming but you were too bored at the time to think of any consequences.

“Nope! Don’t Bucky me. You wanted my attention? You got it now. And you’re getting ALL of it.” He teased, squeezing your belly repeatedly, making you try to curl up. “Awww don’t hide your little bellyyy!” He smirked, bringing you close and blow a raspberry in the crook of your neck.

“BAHAHA! NAHAHAHAAA IHIHITS TOO MUHUHUCH!” You wheezed, bringing your shoulder up to your ear to block him out. Bucky giggled along with you and dug his thumbs into your inner thighs.

“Aww, you asked for more than you can handle? I mean you were begging and begging for me to play with you… now I am and you’re acting like you don’t wanna play with me anymore.” He pouted sarcastically, grinning at your shrieks from tickling your inner thighs. He held you like a baby again and nuzzled his stubble into your waistline. You shook your head violently and began to let out hysterical laughter, impatiently kicking out your feet in ticklish agony.

“H-no no nohohohooo. No MOHOHORE I CAHAHANT. IHIHIM SORRY I MADE YOU LOHOHOSE!”

Bucky smirked and leaned your upper body off the couch while keeping your legs on his lap. Then; with your shirt ridden up from your position, he thoroughly shook his hand into the middle of your belly causing you fall into another stream of giggly laughter, a wide grin on your face and your nose scrunched up. “Oh you’re adorable.” He cooed, scooping you back up and kissing your forehead. “You’re lucky you’re cute. I woulda given you the Sam treatment.” He teased, winking at you before getting up from the couch and taking you with him. “I’ll be back, Parker.” And with that, he brought you to his room and laid with you on the bed.

“Let’s take a nap.” He said, gently pulling your head to his chest. But you got back up, straddling him.

“Buuuuck, I don’t wanna take a nap… I wanna play.” You whined, pointing your lip at him.

“You’re to tired to play.” He said quickly after you, shaking his head slowly. “See?” He softly poked your belly a few times, making you groan and giggle at the same time and curl in ok yourself. “Ah ha, you’re too sleepy to play. Take a nap. I’ll be here with you and we’ll nap together.” He said, pulling your head to his chest again. This time you stayed, heaving a sigh and reluctantly closing your eyes. Sleep quickly overtook you and you felt good. Feeling the warmth of Bucky being there with you was really what you needed.

It was never about play or entertainment, you just wanted your Bucky.

—

I’m so soft 🥺

[emiewritesthings]

doctor, doctor - jay halstead

jay halstead x fem!reader

summary: in which y/n takes it into her own hands to look after a sick jay 

a/n: i’m not gonna lie i think this is one of my fav things i’ve ever written, i would really appreciate some feedback and p.s the beginning of it is based on that scene from brooklyn 99 :)

masterlist

“okay, it’s 10 o’clock, meaning halstead is officially an hour late to work,” y/n announced as she appeared from the break room with a mug of poorly made coffee. looking around, she had immediately distracted everyone in the room with her playful smile. “okay let’s do this, theories!” she encouraged, taking a sip with excitement, but immediately regretting it as s he spat it back in the mug and abandoned it on adam’s desk as she leant against it.

“uh, he forgot to set his alarm?” antonio suggested, willing to play along with the little game that y/n had created. however clearly his answer didn’t suffice as y/n scrunched up her nose and shook her head in disappointment.

“you are a detective in a unit that just last week rescued 5 people kidnapped and used as chess pieces in a human sized version of the game and the best you could come up with is he forgot to set his alarm? pfft, disappointing, dawson. who’s willing to take this seriously?” she scoffed, brushing his idea off with a simple roll of the eyes as the group laughed at her ridiculousness. 

“maybe he has been murdered by a gang looking for revenge.” adam piped up, earning a sudden and rather forceful slap on the back as y/n cheered. her eyes looking over at antonio as she gestured towards the less experienced detective.

“yes, that’s what i’m talking about. bit dark, ruzek, but better than dawson’s,” y/n hummed, adam clearly pleased with the praise he had received by the pretty detective. “any one else wanna shot?” she offered it out into the room, suddenly the sound of rolling wheels on the chair had everyone turn to face al who was munching on a ham sandwich.

“he walked into the middle of a drug ring, slept with the kingpins daughter and is now having limbs removed, one by the hour.” suddenly an eery silence fell in the bullpen as al suddenly disappeared back to his desk and everyone was left with an image that she was sure was burned on the inside of everyones mind.

“uh, okay, someone might want to arrange a psych check for olinsky asap,” y/n mumbled, pointing in the direction where he had once been and looking around as if checking that she hadn’t been the only one to hear al’s suggestion. “anyways, all of you are wrong. clearly he has joined a motorbike gang and now makes his money on the road striking off names on the government’s hit list.” 

just as the room erupted into discussion about how idiotic this conversation was, as well as their ideas, the sound of footsteps caught y/n’s attention as she arrived at her desk. however as he reached the floor, the reason for his absence was clear.

“woah, you look like death.” adam chuckled, it immediately being silenced as jay sent a deadly glare his way. with his skin paler than normal with undertones of green, a layer of sweat draped over his forehead. jay flashed as smile at y/n as he passed, reaching his desk and collapsing on his chair with a wince. 

as everyone went back to what they were doing, y/n found herself straying her eyes away from her computer screen for longer and longer periods of time until she found herself by his side with a sickly sweet grin, pun intended. 

“i don’t wanna hear it, y/l/n.” jay mumbled, massaging his temples with his fingers hoping it would somehow sooth his pounding skull. whilst usually he had every minute of his day just to hear the woman chat away about whatever crossed her mind, he had found himself in quite the state since last night, leaving him restless and irritable.

“believe it or not, i just wanted to make sure you were alright,” y/n’s entire demeanour crumbled as she melted at the soft features of his face that came with being so vulnerable. but from the look in jay’s eyes, it was clear he didn’t 100% believe her excuse. “and to ask what the hell you think you are doing here? you are sick jay, you need to rest.” 

it was very rare that jay found himself ill. in the years that y/n had been working by the man’s side, she could count on one hand the times she had seen him with so much as a cough. in fact she had called him captain immune system for a period of time when she realised he was pretty much indestructible. y/n couldn’t deny the concern bubbling in her gut seeing him so weak.

“i’m fine,” with her eyes slitted in a look that practically shouted ‘bullshit’, jay continued. “i promise, it’s just a little cold. nothing serious, i think i’ll survive.” he joked dryly, finding it incredibly hard to look away from y/n for her eyes were filled with a warmth that he knew was an expression usually saved for those she cared deeply about. 

“yeah well, you need to take care of yourself, jay, i’m being serious. chicago can cope if you just have one day off, get your energy back.” 

y/n was reminded of the times she had the exact same words spoken to her by the exact person that didn’t seem to want to take them onboard. every time she had so much as a sniffle he would be straight over with some soup that his mother used to swear by and the name of a box set that he would put on for the two of them to watch as he sat stroking her hair in order to try and convince her body to rest. neither of them had anyone else to take care of them, so had taken it upon themselves to be that person for the other. 

“now, i’m gonna go tell voight that i’m taking you home before you infect this whole office.” before he could object, she had already ran (not literally but jay was impressed by her speed walking) to her boss’ office. knocking on the door, with a sweet smile and a sea of words running off her tongue so quickly that voight had to agree just to shut her up, y/n returned by his side. “come on, germ face, your carriage awaits.” 

“you know i love it when you talk dirty to me, y/l/n.” winking at her, y/n giggled as she supported him back down the stairs and out of the station. the two chatted away, y/n explaining how she thought al was secretly a sociopath and jay filing her in on the newest instalment of his apartment block drama until they pulled up in front of jay’s apartment building. 

as they walked through the door, jay’s arm resting around y/n’s shoulders as he struggled to find strength, they managed to reach the sofa before y/n’s body gave up. both of them letting out large breathes before looking at each other and falling into laughter. 

“you hungry, i could try making your mom’s soup?” y/n asked, as she pushed herself up to look down at the man. her hair falling down around her face and tickling jay’s skin. “i’m sure it won’t be as good as her’s but i’m willing to give it a try.” 

the way she was sat with the large window gleaming light behind her, y/n almost looked like an angel. her eyes and smile were wide, with her beauty wrapping its hands around jay’s neck squeezing until his head felt light and he nearly reached up to touch her porcelain skin. but jay had noticed the sensation way before he was blocked up with a cold.

“yeah, uh, that sounds nice.” jay agreed with a minimal amount of sass, but y/n didn’t seem to notice as she moved off the cushions and towards the kitchen. she had pretty much memorised the recipe when jay had finally given it to her on her birthday after offering to pay for it multiple times. whizzing around the kitchen, she was too busy to notice the tired eyes admiring her from afar. 

jay wished his mom was alive to see the woman that she would have loved. all the times he had brought girls back to his family when he was younger didn’t add up to an ounce of the beauty and power that y/n held in her middle finger. the way she bit back at his wit, but also had the ability to spot when he was upset from the other side of the city. she was everything her mother wanted in a daughter in law, everything she wanted for her little boy. 

“okay, give me your honest opinion. i can take it i promise.” y/n sudden appeared with a tray that held a large bowl of the semi-thick orange liquid, a glass of water and a couple pills. approaching jay, she carefully helped him up from where he laid and placed it onto his lap. “actually that was a complete lie, do not tell me the truth. i may just cry.” 

“why thank you, nurse y/l/n.” he teased.

“it’s doctor actually.” she quipped back.

jay chuckled lowly, as he grabbed the spoon and took a large spoonful to his mouth. feeling the slight sting of his tongue at the heat, it was only when the flavours hit that he was suddenly transported to an earlier time in his life. a simpler time. only this time there was y/n by his side. 

“the verdict?” she prompted, taking a seat besides him, pulling her knees up to her chest. 

“not sure whether i want to tell you, don’t think you’ll fit in this room if your ego grows any bigger.” y/n grinned as she leaned over to press a kiss against his shoulder. jay closed his eyes at the contact, feeling the ache in his body freeze for a moment as it registered the tingling sensation. “all jokes aside, it really is good.” 

“i’m glad, your mother was a smart woman.” she nodded, leaning forward to turn tv on. jay continued to spoon the soup into his mouth, as y/n chose a show that they both had started together and had refused to watch another minute without the other. y/n leaned back making herself comfortable, having already texted voight telling him that she would most likely need the entire day off, and getting the go ahead, she had no plans other than being by jay’s side for the next however many hours. 

it was sometime in the early evening and the tv continued to emit light, but neither jay nor y/n was paying any attention to the drama. jay, with his head on y/n lap, was leaning into her touch as her short, thin fingers ran through the dark strands that sprouted from his scalp. his body wrapped in a blanket that y/n had grabbed from his room, he felt completely at peace. 

“you know what, i think you are more bearable when you are at death’s door.” y/n joked quietly, as the forest green eyes were exposed back to her own. jay groaned in annoyance, realising that there was no sweet y/n without the sharped tongue y/n. a trait he adored, but at his own expense. 

“and to think i was starting to think you had gone soft on me, y/l/n.” he hummed, wishing he could forever have her giggle on repeat wherever he went, for the sound made goosebumps run down his neck and down his arms, like some kind of magic that only y/n possessed. 

“as much as i love you, i can’t risk my bad ass reputation for you.” 

although jay was sure it was just part of her banter, the moment the ‘i love you’ fell off her tongue, he found himself wide awake, unable to push past the feeling in his gut as it looped over again and again in his mind. y/n could see the conflict in his face, as he glanced up at her with something she had never noticed before. 

“you mean it?” he asked. 

“mean what?” confused, her fingers fell from his hair, making jay regret ever opening his mouth.

“do you really, you know, love me?” he knew he had committed too far to try and retreat. maybe he could blame it on the fact he couldn’t think straight, although she was like a lie detector that wouldn’t let such a bogus excuse pass. y/n blinked down at him, watching as he sat up to look at her with a hunger that needed to be addressed. swallowing the lump in her throat, y/n nodded.

“of course, you are one of my best friends, jay.” it was true, but it wasn’t the full truth, both of them knew that.

“i didn’t realise we had started lying to one another,” jay’s eyes were soft, as he reached to place his hand against her cheek, smiling as she slowly leaned into it. closing her eyes, she tried to find what direction she was looking for, but didn’t dare take the first step. without even thinking, jay jutted forward and captured her lips before they could form a single syllable. 

gently, but passionately, jay and y/n moved their lips against the others. the feeling was ever-growing as the kiss deepened and deepened until they had no choice to pull back, deprived of their ability to breath. as jay’s eyes came back into view, y/n, for the first time in her life, had lost the ability to form a sentence. 

“we just...” she began but it ran off quickly. jay chuckled.

“we did.”

the two sat in silence, examining the other one’s face until y/n found herself moving forward until she was sat in his lap, legs wrapped around his waist as she pressed her lips against his. just like before their bodies and minds were set ablaze with desire and what had remained unspoken for what felt like forever. jay had nearly completely forgotten about the illness that had put him in the care of the woman that he craved more than anything else the world had to offer. 

as their lips parted ways, suddenly the air had thinned and everything felt... normal. jay’s lips were unable to break out of the large grin mould that y/n had put them in, which was soon mirrored by the young woman. a small giggle escaping her lips.

“if i get whatever it is you have, i expect the exact same treatment.” 

“only for you, doctor y/l/n.”

[pinkmirth]

can i req some dad reiner fluff? i feel like he would have a lot of kids bc of the breeding kink 🥴 but yeah just some cute stuff pls thank uuuu!!

THE THOUGHT OF REINER BEING FATHER JUST DOES SOMETHING TO ME I- AJHSJS

THANK YOU SM FOR REQUESTING, ANON!! LET'S GET CAUGHT UP IN THE REINER BRAINROT TOGETHER <3

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—DAD REINER!

 (MODERN AU + MENTIONS OF PREGNANCY + FEMALE BODIED READER + FLUFF + SLIGHTLY SUGGESTIVE + REINER BEING THE BEST DAD EVER DUH + TW: SLIGHT LANGUAGE)

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Dad Reiner who was such a hot mess moments before he became a father to begin with. The pair of you are situated inside a hospital room, occupied with things much bigger than a sprained ankle. He stood alongside you, his beloved, all the while; Encouraging your efforts and attempting to ease your pain with the squeeze of your hand within his bigger one. As fretful as he feels, it's no surprise that Reiner ends up passing out a good few times, and he wasn't even the one in labor. Though, the hard part is now over, and all his worry has subsided.

Dad Reiner who recalls whimpering, weakly grinning, and eventually bawling of joy when holding his child for the first time. You'd never seen his cries mingled with such joy before. He cradles yours and his newborn within firm forearms and large, mindful hands. The pair of you sob and smile, ogle your baby with a relieved, content thrum in your heart. You allow Reiner to attempt squeezing into the hospital bed beside you, as broad and weighty as he is, with your child being held right between you and him. He’s a hot mess, but an overjoyed one who has you; and little Reiner x [Y/N] junior 🥺

Dad Reiner who converses with you for days before ultimately deciding on a name for yours and his daughter— Joyce Braun. He contemplated on “Karina”, the name of his dear mother. Though, he wants his little girl to be better than any past generation, and rather goes with a more revitalizing name, one that holds a simple, but deep meaning in his perspective. As obvious as it sounds, the name means “Joyful”. That's all he wants; for his kid to be happy in this life, happier than he ever was. Therefore, he bases her name, the root of his dear child’s identity, on cheerfulness.

Dad Reiner who tends to grow somewhat frustrated. Not with you of course, not even with Joyce’s incessant wailing in the early hours of the morning, but with himself. It wasn't as though he did anything wrong, he simply hopes that he won't. Begs himself not to fuck up with this whole “Parent” thing. If it wasn’t clear enough, Reiner wants to be nothing like his own father. He’ll never, ever shoo his child away and disregard them, but instead use those same hands to hold, guide, and lift them up. It doesn't take long for the blonde to snap out of his funk, because he's sure that he can become all the better for the sake of his little family.

Dad Reiner who wakes to your still, ethereal-like form every morning, and it's enough to make his day. A kiss to your neck, a nibble along your earlobe, and a couple repetitive rubs to your waist and thighs are enough to stir you right awake. And if that isn't the case, then it's usually the other way around; You pressing soft, lengthy kisses to his sharp, attractive cheekbones. Despite who arises first, there’s always one thing that's bound to happen— Joyce making her arrival into the bedroom via crawl, with a babble and a cute, happy little shriek upon seeing her parents.

The pair of you have no clue as to how she manages to make her way over to your room every time, but you're simply glad that she does so safely. It's Reiner’s cue to leap out of bed and scoop her off of the carpet and into his awaiting arms, clad in nothing but a white tee and the baggiest sweats. He appears disheveled, but it's still clear to see the main striking similarity between him and his pretty little daughter; Those amber brown eyes that hold the same warm, yellowish hue as his do.

He rocks the giggling one-year old, back and forth and right back again, gazing upon his squirming bundle of joy until you mention that he’s been doing so for a whole ten minutes. He grows sheepish and merely chuckles in reply, resting Joyce’s head upon his firm chest with a sigh. He could do this for ten hours more if it were up to him.

Dad Reiner who knocked you up a couple more times, and real damn good at that. There’s something of a breeding fetish that he’s got on him, which is the reason why your little family is now two kids larger. There’s Joyce, who’s now seven years old, along with her two baby brothers, the pair being a mere one year apart from the other. You and Reiner no longer have to worry about checking on Joyce in her crib, for she sleeps on her own bed now, like the “big girl” she claims to be.

Though, the boys now have you both occupied, and you’re lucky to have an older daughter who’s so understanding and rarely ever  grows jealous. Joyce, your girl who’s on more of the rambunctious side but ironically never pleads for attention, has been spending much more quality time with Reiner. Both you and him are busy with the boys, but the blonde tends to have free time on his hands every now and then. Besides, someone’s got to keep Joyce company.

Reiner happily obliges, and makes this father-daughter time worthwhile. Wholesome picnics to the park that always end in races back to the car and Reiner being a damned klutz and dropping his sandwich. Having a “spa day”, filled with Reiner’s not-so-great attempts at doing his girl’s hair, messy manicures and a hefty bag of makeup that Joyce “borrowed” from you. He spoils the girl as if the lot of you are rich (and since Reiner’s always got a hefty load of spare cash, you technically are), but he wouldn’t have it any other way.

Dad Reiner who’s a lot more used to this “dad” thing now, since it’s been a couple good years down the line. You and him have amazing bonds with each of your kids, but they seem to latch onto Reiner’s large, broad body at any given time a lot more than they do you. Joyce is twelve, the brothers are five and six, and Reiner’s officially a DILF— The finest one at that. His stubble stays nicely trimmed, along with the subtle creases at his eyes becoming a little more distinctive. Goes to work, and sometimes takes the kid’s lunches instead of his own, because that's just the Reiner Way.

He’s the ultimate father in practically every situation, even when looking out for peers and comrades. He doesn’t mean to, it’s just that habits easily stick with Reiner, and it’s rather difficult for him to let them go. Besides, with three kids, how do you expect him to not be in “dad mode”?

Dad Reiner who utterly loves having random little talks with his kids, and never invalidates them, not for one second. It’s almost as though he can see things in their perspective, and they don’t know anyone else better to vent to other than their dad and mom. Though, when they tend to babble on about something that’s rather popular within their generation, it gets hard for him to catch up. They proceed to call him “old” and receive a good chase around the house before they get caught and looped into a tickle attack, and that's basically the worst thing imaginable if you’re in the Braun family. The reason being is Reiner’s unparalleled speed, despite his age; Thirties to early forties, but he’s still extremely fit, and has no problem running a mile if he has to.

Dad Reiner who’s in love with his family and the person they’ve gradually helped him become. You cherish him and your kids like none other, and he does the same. Sometimes it abruptly dawns on him; He’s a dad, and he’s actually a good one, who would’ve known? He smiles to himself, allowing his amber eyes to flit over to wherever you are before his soft grin grows wider. You look back, blow a kiss, and he does the same. The action is exchanged before he strides over to give you the real deal— Though, your sweet little peck is all cut short when Joyce and the boys skip in and start making kissy noises, with you and Reiner laughing all the while.

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“Papa,” Gale, the youngest son of the bunch, calls aloud and gains his father’s attention. Reiner peers up from his book and gives a brief, questioning response. “Yes, dove?” It’s a simple, sweet nickname; One that he calls you, Joyce, and the boys.

“Mommy’s in the bathroom crying.” The blonde drops his novel with an punctuating hitch of his breath, the book falling upon the couch with a dull thump. “—Why? Is she alright?” Reiner, the man who generally keeps himself rather poised, is now frantic, sharp brows downturned at his son's statement.

“Uh, I dunno. She’s crying, but smiling too.” This then causes Reiner’s brows to furrow. “Smiling, you say?”

“Yeah. Can we go out to get ice cream today? I wanna get, uh.. Chocolate chip, please!”

Reiner lets a brief laugh slip loose at Gale’s query, but he has to prioritize his wife over a summertime snack. He then begins to make a beeline towards the bathroom, in search of you. “Soon enough, dove. I’ve got to go up there and check on your momma first, alright—?”

Gale then shrugs and hops onto the couch, little feet padding along the spacey seat as the leather creases underneath his weight.

“By the way, Papa,” Reiner then pauses, open to any vital information his son could give, “she has this funny stick thingy in her hand. It’s got two little lines on it and stuff.”

Reiner chokes on his breath, lower lip beginning to tremble and quirk into a smile. If the case is what he thinks it is, he’s got all the reason to bust out with the teary eyes and jovial whimpers, just as he did when receiving the news of his three expected children in the past.

“A stick..?”

“Mhm,” hums Gale, proceeding to jump upon the dark brown couch, “Mama probably wants some chocolate chip ice cream too.”

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[comfyswitcherblanketfort]

Gentle

number 3 on the poll was ‘the softest yennskier smut i can muster’ and y’all i don’t know that i’ve ever written softer smut? idk, y’all be the judge of that

shoutout to @geraltrogerericduhautebellegarde for betaing this fic for me and being lovely and encouraging 💖

Warnings: well its smut, fwb to lovers, yen is scared of vulnerability and getting burned, penetrative sex, oral sex, m/f but don’t y’all think for a second these two aren’t bi as fuck. i don’t wanna hear any of that ‘but its a straight ship comfy!!!’ from anyone. understand? good.

______________________

“Bard, don’t start with me tonight.”

“Too late,” Jaskier hummed, looking up at her from where he was sprawled on the bed. He was, admittedly, a rather pleasing sight. His chest covered in a thick layer of hair and his legs long and lean. He looked like something one would paint. And he was lying on her bed, nearly naked, looking at her with a coy smile that held... too much. 

Yennefer didn’t often think things were too anything- painful, expensive, annoying- but this man was too sincere in everything he did, including wooing her. He called it wooing. She called it ‘following me around like an orphan pup’. 

Either way she’d already partially given in. She thought she was firm in her boundaries though, repeatedly claiming they were just fucking. This was just revenge and fun. She would not fall for anyone, especially not after the way all of her past relationships had ended in disaster.

She settled into her nighttime routine, taking out her earrings and wiping away her lipstick at the borrowed -not stolen- vanity across from the bed in the borrowed -not stolen- master suite she’d been staying in, “I am not one for love. Don’t get your hopes up.”

“You’re almost as much of a hopeless romantic as me,” Jaskier laughed, rolling so he was sitting at the end of the bed facing her.

She could see him in the mirror over her shoulder but resolutely ignored him. There was a long stretch of silence where he watched her take away all the different things she adorned herself with. From eyeliner to jewelry to the way she curled her hair, it was a very carefully constructed facade and she feared he may have seen through it. 

As she stood, he reached out and caught her hand, tugging her to stand in front of him. She raised an eyebrow, expecting a remark about her body, maybe even something about a strip tease before bed. But the bard continually surprised her.

“What’s wrong with a little vulnerability?”

She sighed and pulled her hand back, crossing her arms over her dressing gown and rocking back on her heels, “Do we need to do this right now?” 

Jaskier stood, so close that she could feel the warmth radiating off him, but he kept his hands to himself as much as she could see he wanted to touch her, “You don’t want to know someone? To let them take care of you for once?”

“No.” Her stare was resolute but her voice wavered, even on such a small word.

“Why not?”

She pursed her lips and held back the immediate insult she’d thought. He deserved an answer if she really was going to let him stay, and she knew she would. Whatever the reason, she found she didn’t want to be without him anymore.

“It hurts,” she whispered, hoping he would understand and let her be. Or better yet distract her. 

He ran his hand down her arm, fingertips dancing across her skin and leaving goosebumps in their wake. He said nothing, just watched and waited, completely open and patient and infuriating in his persistence. She could easily go for the kill, both metaphorically and literally, but she knew she wouldn’t. This was the first person in decades who had bothered with her. She didn’t count Geralt anymore. There was so much magic and Destiny and manipulation tangled up in their relationship that she’d lost track of any sincerity. 

No, the bard was genuine. He didn’t have any other motive but to love her. And the thought terrified her. 

She shook her head and looked at the ground, “You don’t understand. I haven’t… I’ve never had a love that ended well.”

Jaskier smiled and tucked her hair behind her ear, “Only the shitty ones do.”

A puff of air left her before she could conceal her amusement.

“You don’t have to be scared. I want to be gentle with you. In every way. I want you to know what it’s like to be taken care of,” Jaskier’s whisper spoke directly to the part of her she’d kept locked away for far too long. The part of her that yearned to be held for nothing other than lying close; that wanted sweet nothings and breathless kisses and actual lovemaking, not just goal oriented sex. 

Her tongue worked of its own accord, used to acting only in defense, “How many times have you used that line?” 

A moment of hurt flashed over Jaskier’s face before those big blue eyes were framed with a kind of sadness only someone who’d known the sting of neglect could understand, “Not once.” 

She searched his eyes for something, anything that she could use to push him away, but found nothing. For once her choice was simple; take what is freely and sincerely offered, or continue on miserable and alone. 

For once, she took a risk. 

Yennefer draped her arms over his shoulders, tilting her chin up to level him with what she hoped was the pleading expression she was going for, “Just don’t lie to me.” 

Jaskier pressed their foreheads together and rested his hands on her hips, “I won’t.” 

It had been a lifetime since Yennefer had believed someone like she believed Jaskier and it settled achingly into the pit of her stomach. She leaned in and stood on her tiptoes, brushing their lips together as she took a shaky breath in. 

When they finally kissed it was… calm. There was no unquenchable fire sparking in her belly, no stirring need to cling to him as if she’d never see him again. They were simply together, and the realization made her giggle.

Jaskier rested a hand at her jaw, brushing his thumb over her cheek as he nervously chuckled along, “What?”

She bit her lip and stared up at him through her lashes, running her fingers through the hair at the nape of his neck, “It’s nothing…”

“Hmm, doesn’t seem like nothing,” Jaskier’s tone was light as he sat back onto the bed, pulling her to straddle his hips, “What’s so funny?”

“S’not funny,” she sighed, pausing to kiss him again, feeling the same sense of calm, “Just... nice.”

“Just nice?” Jaskier was beaming up at her as he held her close to him, “I think I can do better than nice.”

She raised her eyebrows and grinned, brushing his fringe out of his eyes, “It wasn’t a challenge.”

He tilted his head back and forth and scrunched his nose as if to argue before laying back on the bed and pulling her with him. She braced herself on her elbows, one on each side of his head, as he trailed his hands up and down her sides. 

This kiss was different.

This kiss set her whole body on fire, not the desperate kind that made her frantic, but a slow, hot-burning flame that she wanted to sink into and let consume her. 

Jaskier clutched her to him as he rolled them over, gently brushing her hair out of her face and placing feather light kisses over her cheeks, eyes, brow, chin, everywhere he could reach. She sighed when he finally kissed her lips, tangling her fingers in his hair and pulling. 

Jaksier chuckled, “Mmm, greedy? Impatient?”

“Whichever you like,” Yennefer gasped, not quite slipping the teasing tone in with her words, distracted as he sucked a dark red mark right behind her ear. She tugged at the hem of his smalls and he quickly kicked them off, giving her a pointed look. 

“You promised better than nice,” she countered, giving a small shrug as he hovered over her again.

He hummed as he moved down her neck, chest, and finally made it to her silk robe, “Shall we get rid of this? Don’t- Don’t do it yourself,” he grabbed her hands and pinned them by her head, not with much force but she still felt a heat pool in her core, “I want to.”

She nodded and stared at him in awe as he carefully untied the delicate silk belt and softly, oh so fucking softly, brushed the material over her shoulder. The cool slide on her skin sent shivers down her spine and his warm, calloused fingers were a delicious contrast. 

He skipped her breasts completely, kissing a trail down over her stomach, leaving a small circle of delicate kisses around her navel as he held her hips almost reverently. Unlike his normally teasing habits, he wasted no time in freeing her from her simple lingerie, holding her thighs where he wanted and leaving more kisses along the inside of her knee. Every now and then his fringe would brush over the delicate skin and Yennefer would gasp, reaching for him, any part of him, as if it would ground her and dull the feeling of lightning traveling beneath her skin to a manageable shock. Even when she got her hand in his hair, it didn’t change how she gasped when his tongue tickled the crease of her hips or how she shivered when he nosed along the soft curls between her legs. 

“J-Julian,” She keened, then bit her lip and stared at the ceiling in mute horror. She remembered vividly when he’d shouted at several different people for using that name, for pretending to know him well enough. 

He licked up her folds, making sure to look her in the eyes as he spoke, “Say it again.”

Her breath hitched when he spread her apart and flicked his tongue over her clit, it was no trouble at all to let out a needy sigh of his name over and over again. 

When she tensed her thighs, he held them open, and when her hands curled into fists in his hair, he only groaned. He worked slowly, and any other time she would be annoyed at his pace, but this time she relaxed and let him take care of her. Let him delicately stretch her until he felt she was ready as his free hand stroked any bit of soft bare skin he could reach. 

“Julian, please,” she begged, and for once it wasn’t performative. She needed him. Needed him so acutely she wasn’t entirely sure what she’d do if she couldn’t have him in her immediately. 

He rested his forehead on her hip, breathing heavy as he slowly circled her clit with his thumb, “Tell me what you want.”

“You know,” she whined, clenching around his fingers. She’d deny it in the morning, but she whined. It almost startled her when she realised that, like this, she was completely at his disposal and she didn’t mind one bit. Anything he said she would agree to, anything he did, she would follow his lead. 

He crawled up her body, leaving kisses in his wake, her skin on fire wherever they touched, “Let me hear it?"

“I need you, all of you. Please?”

Jaskier’s breath came out shaky before he kissed her, “You’ll have everything I am,” he whispered.

For a moment she wondered if she was supposed to hear his words. They sounded almost like a confession, so softly spoken that it was almost impossible to tell he’d said anything at all. But she was quickly distracted by his tongue on her lips as they kissed and his cock sliding through her slick folds. She moaned softly, her hands sweeping up his chest to cup his jaw and hold him close. 

Nothing else mattered. Not their troubles, not their heartbreak, not the politics they’d found themselves in the middle of. The other person was all they had the consciousness for and they completely consumed each other. 

Jaskier finally broke away gasping and adjusted so the head of his cock was positioned at her entrance. He looked into her eyes and before he could ask, she breathed a soft “yes” and kissed his nose. Their foreheads rested together as he slowly pushed in, blue eyes locked with violet as they both gasped and hissed. Neither of them moaned wantonly like before, neither of them put on a show, and certainly no one grunted in frustration. They moved in a gentle rhythm together, each taking the time to really feel the other and hold them close. 

For the first time in such a long time, Yennefer was content.

She didn’t realize she’d squeezed her eyes shut until Jaskier kissed her again, probably several minutes later, and whispered, “Look at me.”

He looked at her like she was his only guide, only anchor keeping him in this world. There was a light sheen of sweat on his forehead and his cheeks were as rosy as his kiss-swollen lips and Yennefer wished she could capture the image forever. She thought of painting him again, if only she could paint worth shit.  

He kissed her again and breathed, “close,” as he picked up his pace. She nodded, wrapping one leg around his hips and reaching between them to circle her clit as he thrust. 

She came first with a gasp and soft “oh” as she did her best to keep her eyes on him, let alone open. She truly didn’t remember the last time she was so quiet when she orgasmed, or the last time she caressed her lover instead of digging her nails into their back. Her body shivered, but it wasn’t earth shattering. Nothing about it would be memorable aside from the way he looked at her. 

The adoration and unbridled passion behind his gaze would haunt her forever. Only time would tell if she’d be glad to see his ghost. 

She wrapped her other leg around him as the fog began to lift, leaving her just on the pleasant side of over-sensitive. Jaskier buried his face in her neck as she smoothed her hands over his back, trailing her fingers down his spine and turning to kiss his temple. She cradled his head to her as he came, body shaking as he whispered her name like a prayer. 

Her hands roamed his body, reveling in the softness of his skin and the power held in his frame as she gently soothed any tightness in his muscles. After a while she settled to carding her fingers through his hair as he rested his cheek on her collarbone. He’d slipped out as he softened, but they laid still, Yen enjoying the comforting weight while Jaskier recovered. 

“Are you alright?” she whispered her question, tucking her chin in to try to get a look at his face. 

He just hummed and nodded, turning his head to face her with a dreamy smile.

A bright smile spread across her features and she kissed his forehead, “Do I get to call you Julian now?”

One of his arms snaked up under her back as he snuggled in closer, “Only you.”

Yennefer paused, holding her breath as she debated whether what she thought was worth saying.

“Spit it out, love,” Jaskier spoke through a yawn.

She let out a breathy laugh and wrapped her arms around his shoulders before she whispered, “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“Wanting to… to take care of me.”

[binniesthighs]

in my arms | jisung x reader |

Pairing: self insert, female reader x han jisung 

Genre: fluff n smut 

Warnings: switch!reader, switch!jisung, established relationship, explicit language, oral (m&f giving and receiving), teasing, body praise, pretty dang fluffy ngl, cum swallowing, back scratching 

Word count: 2.3k

this drabble is inspired by jisung’s most recent vlog where he was just chillin’ and being so soft and cozy I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it huhu I hope that you enjoy my first post ever  ♡

“You’re not falling asleep are you?” You gently nudge jisung’s head where it was resting on your shoulder. You didn’t have the heart to tell him, but you had spent the last 20 minutes or so trying to ignore the pins and needles that the weight gave your arm.

“--nO!” He squeaked, then rather sleepily rose his head leaving you to try to shake your arm back to life in the least conspicuous way possible.

“I though you said that this was your favorite movie?” You brushed a few rogue strands of his warm brown hair out of his eyes, letting your fingers linger for a moment to savor its addictive softness.

Jisung pouted while he fixed his baggy white tee collar which had fallen under his collarbones. His eyes didn’t catch you sneaking a peak.

“I wouldn’t sleep through my favorite movie.”

“Really?” You cocked an eyebrow up with a growing smile, meeting his eyes which had become as baggy as his shirt.

“Didn’t I tell you? I’m pretty sure that I know every line from that movie; I used to watch it all the time growing up.”

You chuckled a little at his oh-so-common habit of forgetting the little things. “I’m pretty sure you have told me that before.”

“And I told you how I wanted to learn the piano song as well? And--”

“--and it was too hard for you to learn?” You snickered, “You’ve told me that as well. Someone’s sleepy brain needs to get some rest...can you put the laptop over on the desk for me real quick?”

“Sure.” He nodded, and tore off the fluffy down comforter off of the two of you. You had wished that he had given a warning considering the sudden blast of cold air that met your bare legs when he did so. At the same time, you could never stay mad at him for long, not when he looked like that.

Jisung looked perfectly cuddly in that moment--even more so than usual. His long white tee made it look like he wasn’t wearing his boxers at all, and his hair was perfectly tussled into an adorable looking mess from resting on you. You looked down to his legs and all you wanted was to have them entangled with yours. He turned to return back to bed when you noticed that the little mole on his right collarbone had made an appearance. You made a note to give it a kiss as soon as you got the chance.

As soon as Jisung was back in the bed where it was all toasty, everything felt right again. “Reach the light?

“M’kay.” You answered to twist the switch.

Once all of the lights were off, the two of you sunk into each other, completely wrapped up as close as you possibly could be, skin on skin, the softness of fabric; you could feel him gently breathing from where he had pulled your head into his chest.

He sighed deeply, exhaling. You were half expecting him to concede and tell you that he really was feeling tired, when he whispered the exact opposite. “Well now that I’m awake I can’t fall back asleep.”

“But I thought you said you weren’t sleeping...?” You let out a breathy laugh which made him draw you in closer.

“Shhhh.” He hushed. Jisung then took his hands to the back of your head where he began to play with your hair, massaging your scalp slightly. The sensation was amazingly relaxing and you started to feel your own eyes grow heavy...

You whispered into the dark room, “Mmm that feels so nice.”

“Y/n?”

“Yeah?”

“I...heh...don’t get mad at me for this one but...I’m kind of...you know...”

You pulled your head back, knowing exactly what he meant.

“Right now?”

“...yeah.”

“Is there like a reason, or something? I mean, I wasn’t really doing anything--”

“--There doesn’t need to be a reason...honestly.” Even in the dark of the room you could feel his little nervous smile. “But I mean, we’re in bed, and I’ve got you: so soft and warm all around me, in my arms...are you surprised? You just do that to me.” Jisung’s hand migrated over to rest on your cheek, carefully caressing it with his thumb.

The more that he talked about it, the more you lost yourself in him...as usual. He really had an effect on you as well. You suddenly became even more aware of your legs intertwined and the pressure it created.

“We don’t have to, or-or we could keep it short, I know that you have work tomorrow.”

“Are you trying to convince me to mess around with you right now?” You asked with a creeping smirk in the corner of your mouth.

Jisung shied his head away slightly. “Kind of.”

Upon his words you felt it. Down where you had nearly straddled your legs around him, he was growing harder and you could feel him lightly throbbing. It was a lot to show just for talking.

His breaths quickened and he pulled your head in closer to his, ghosting his lips over yours letting his hot breath tickle your skin. You knew that he was aching to touch you, and you, him.

Jisung whispered on your lips, “Do you want to?”

Your response was quickly given to him when you crashed your lips into his, and he returned with so much hunger, you could have thought that he hadn’t been kissed in months--but of course that wasn’t true. The truth was you could never keep your lips off of him. He knew what it was like and how diligent you could be, making sure that he was covered in them, nothing untouched, and it drove him crazy.

You swung your leg over his hip, and pulled him into you with your thigh as he grabbed a huge handful of your skin to steady himself. His fingernails dug into you with a delightful sting, and you kept working on his mouth, dragging your lips over his both slow and fast, whatever he wanted, it was what you did. Your tongues met in the middle of the heat and slicked over each other with a taste that sent you reeling. Jisung moved his hands to your back where they snuck up your shirt and he traced gentle lines all over. To sweeten it all, you grinded down into his lap, seeking a sensation that your now soaked underwear craved.

“--fuck.” Jisung gasped into your mouth.

He hastily tugged your shirt to the side, lending eager hands to fondle your breasts while his lips never left yours. He had decided to slow down his pace a little bit as he ran over your mouth more, being careful like he didn’t want to scare you. His fingers started to twist your nipples lightly and they quickly hardened. Below your hips, your whole core started to whine with desire for the warmth of his mouth to give it attention. Jisung pinched your bud just right, and it sent you gasping for air against him.

“You like that?” He jested for a second, even you could still see his bright smile in the darkness of the room.

You nodded quickly, hoping he would keep going if you said less.

“God.” He marveled at you for a minute. “You’re just so--”

“--Are you about to say something cheesy Han Jisung?” You lifted your arms to trace the outlines of his shoulder blades behind him, giggling.

“You’re everything.” He leaned down to plant a kiss on your forehead before letting his hands get back to work. He buried his head into your neck, fluttering kisses everywhere that he could only pausing to suck lightly. “You’re...my...everything.” He got out between kisses.

“You’re my...Jisung...” You tugged at his back while he kept flicking your sensitive buds between his fingers. When he was doing so you couldn’t keep your thoughts straight. You wanted so badly to tell him a million words and more about how he was your whole world too, but all you could manage was, “Please...more.”

“You want more baby?”

“Ye--”

He swooped down to bring his mouth to your hard bud, twisting his tongue around it while he cupped it too. With his tongue flat he looked up to you with his gorgeous brown eyes. From how good he was at just this, you could feel yourself getting closer by the second. Your legs crossed tightly to try and relieve some of the pressure. You scraped your nails up his back, getting impatient and eliciting a low groan from him.

“I’m ready.” You prompted and he immediately knew what you wanted, you didn’t even have to say a word.

Jisung cascaded kisses down your stomach, giving some well planned ones to your waist when he got there to give special attention the the stretch marks there. Ever since you had mentioned not liking them, he couldn’t keep his lips off them.

“Gorgeous.” He calmly said, and settled between your thighs.

Your body jerked when he took his thumb to lightly rub circles into your clit, bringing little moans and gasps from your lips. Jisung mischievously snickered to himself over the power that he held over you. He would stop rubbing every few seconds just to hear you whine. At last he pulled your underwear from your legs and you felt the touch of his fingers directly on your clit; he used his other hand to pull your leg back, digging into it like before and it made your whole body shiver. At this point, you had absolutely no control over the sounds coming from your mouth. Wherever he touched, you felt electric.

He darted his pointed tongue around your clit in circles, then would switch to lapping at it agonizingly slow. Over time, your whimpers became more and more desperate.

“Do you wanna cum?” He asked with cockiness laced in his voice.

Your thighs had began to shake without warning. “Ye-yes.”

“Then do it. Cum for me.” Jisung commanded, returning back to his work.

Your mind went completely blank once your orgasm hit you hard. It came it waves, and it only made you shake harder.

After a little chuckle in spite of himself, he brought himself back up to give you more kisses, holding your face is his hands once again.

You came down, feeling more energized than before, and even more desperate to do one thing.

“Your turn.” You commanded of him now, shoving him to his back, leaving a surprised look on his adorably squirrel-like face.

You hastily pulled his shirt up to ravage his chest with your mouth, dragging your burning lips all over the skin and tasting every bit of him that you could. From the sensation he appeared to melt into the bed, taking in shaky inhales while he tangled his fingers in your hair. Just a bit farther down, he was still throbbing under his boxers.

“You ready?” You quickly asked, and he nodded back, teeth catching his bottom lip.

He helped you snag off his boxers, revealing his dripping member pink and ready. You thought to yourself how it just was just so fucking cute when he was excited like that. Instinctually your mouth started to gather with saliva. You decided to use your hand first, pumping it slow and hard, just as you knew that he liked it.

“oh shit--” He moaned out. The words got caught a little in his throat, and that only made him sound even more heavenly.

His eyes were closed, but yours were drawn to him as you kept going. Watching him like this made you feel a surge of confidence that was like a drug. You could do this to him.

“m-more.”  

“Look who is asking for more now?” You grinned.

“Y/n. please. You’re driving me fucking crazy.” His grip tightened on your head.

“You want it like this?”

Without a warning you brought your mouth down to the tip and started licking around it in long strokes and bringing it in just slightly, you didn’t want him feeling all of you just yet.

“oh god.”

“Feels good?”

“Yes. Fuck yes. Just--keep going.”

You teased him for just a little longer than you usually did, just to see what would happen. Of course you should have expected, the longer you waited, the more of a mess he became.

“Y/n, fuck, please.”

You finally caved. “Well since you asked so nicely.”

You brought your head all the way down, taking him completely in and squeezing with your hand just as hard. You hollowed your throat down to take in as much of him as you could without gagging: over the past few months you had perfected it.

“shit-I’m close.” Jisung hissed and buckled his hips.

You took his announcement as an indicator to speed up, so you did. Jisung’s moans and frustrated sighs fueled you further with how beautiful and downright erotic as they sounded. When he came it was unreal, his breaths were so fast one after the other it was almost like he was suffocating with his own pleasure. You held him firmly in your mouth as he finished throbbing, not sacrificing one drop.

As soon as he had a moment to breathe, he pulled you back into his arms and attacked you with kisses all over your face, it didn’t matter where; he was smiling through every one of them. He would pull back then to admire you one more time and your hair which was now in knots thanks to his grip from before.

“that was...”

“Amazing?”

“Yes.” He grinned and gave you a peck to your forehead. “And now I’m tired. I guess we succeeded in more ways than one.”

The two of you put your clothes back on from the light of phone flashlights then crawled back in, sweeping the comforter over top of you once again.

“Jisung?” you nuzzled into him, inhaling his comforting scent all around you.

“Mmm?”

“You’re my everything too.”

[americxn]

congratulations on 240 you deserve millions ♡ ! i was wondering if i could request please one where kit insists on teaching the reader self-defense given to the "dangers of the outside" but they end up wrestling playful and maybe things get a little spicy-smutty? it's totally okay if not and thank u so much for your writing ♡

wordcount: 2k warnings: smut @kitwalkerangel I hope this is okay ! tysm for requesting and I’m sorry it took me a while to get this done

“I wanna teach you something.” Kit spoke from behind where you lay face-down on your shared bed, your boredom having reduced you to a groaning lump atop the covers. You perked up instantly, pushing yourself up to your knees and turning to stare at Kit eagerly, silently urging him to go on. “I had a weird dream last night.” He began, taking a step into the room. “Well, kinda a nightmare actually.” He muttered thoughtfully, causing you to to frown. You thought he had slept peacefully as he always did. “No, it’s fine,” he hurried on at the concern on your face. “I just wanted to... I don’t know this will probably sound weird.” He finished quietly, his hand lifting to rub the back of his neck as his cheeks tinged slightly pink. “Kit,” you began, crawling to the edge of the bed and hopping off it. “I hope you realise that there really isn’t anything that I wouldn’t do for you, no matter how ‘weird’ or stupid it is.” He looked at you as you approached him eagerly. “And besides, I’m bored shitless. Please give me something to do.” You reached for his hand and gave it an encouraging squeeze. “Okay,” he said with a wry smile, dragging you by the hand out of the room and down the hall.

Twenty minutes later, you stood in the middle of your living room floor with your feet braced apart and your hands raised in fists before your face, Kit mirroring your stance. Kit had claimed that he wanted to teach you some self-defence so that you could protect yourself against the ‘dangers of the outside world’. He had hurriedly explained to you that it wasn’t just because of the whole alien thing; he was genuinely terrified of the thought of any harm befalling you, especially after witnessing firsthand at Briarcliff just how cruel and monstrous some people could be.   Your heart had ached at the genuine fear on his face as he explained this to you, so of course you agreed to oblige him. “So, you always wanna keep one arm raised to block any punches. Never leave your face, or anywhere for that matter, unguarded.” You nodded, watching as he demonstrated how to throw a strong punch whilst keeping one arm raised to shield your face. “And where did you learn all this from, Mr. Walker?” You said in slight awe, impressed by his knowledge of self-defence. “Well, I’ve gotten into a few fights in my time.” He replied with a playful wink. “Oh, of course.” You nodded, stepping forwards and raising your arms, throwing a few over-exaggerated punches his way. His giggled, one of his hands shooting out to grasp your wrist as you threw another weak punch into the air. You gasped as he pulled you to him by your wrist, his other hand coming to the small of your back to hold your body to his. “Get me off.” He whispered, his nose almost touching yours. You tried to pull away, squirming around in an attempt to shake his grip from you. He chuckled lightly, his breath tickling your face. You pulled away with renewed vigour at his amusement, but his grip was just too strong. You sighed, meeting his intense gaze. “Are you gonna teach me how to get you off, or...?” You trailed off as Kit grinned at you, shaking his head slowly. “No. I like having you this close to me.” You swallowed as his voice dropped an octave, his eyes flicking to you lips. You carefully shifted your weight as you blinked at Kit, quietly moving your foot to plant it behind his own, your ankle pressing against his. You gave his chest a hard shove, Kit trying to step back to regain his balance, but when his foot met yours he teetered, falling to the floor and taking you with him. You laughed triumphantly, using his chest to push yourself up so that you were sat upright, straddling his hips. His hand stayed pressed against your lower back as the corners of his mouth curved upwards. “Impressive.” He commented, causing you to grin brightly down at him. “Thank you. I would say that I learnt from the best but you didn’t really teach me anything.” You teased, watching gleefully as Kit’s eyebrows shot up. In an instant, Kit sat up suddenly against you, the world tilting as he moved his hips, his hands coming to support your fall as he flipped you over. Your smirk was quickly replaced by a scowl as Kit settled his weight carefully onto you. “Asshole.” You grunted, a smile hidden in your tone. Your legs rose up, your knees pressing into Kit’s back in a vain attempt to push him off. He reached for your face, unfazed by your efforts, his fingertips cold as he brushed the hair that had fallen onto your forehead back into place. His eyes were soft as he giggled down at your hopeless expression. “I thought you were supposed to be teaching me?” You huffed, your hands slamming slightly into his chest. “Okay. Plant your feet on the floor.” You did as he instructed. “Then lift your hips up suddenly, as far up as they can go.” Following his instruction, you thrusted your hips up quickly, watching as Kit was thrown slightly off your body. But it only took him a second to regain his balance and settle himself back onto you again. "See?” He said. You blinked at him. “Yeah, but I didn’t actually get you off though.” “No, but if you can disable them, you would probably be able to flip them off.” At your thoughtful nod, he leant forwards, you going still as his fingers gently traced the shell of your ear. “Just a tip,” he began, his finger looping over the top of your ear. “An ear is actually kinda easy to rip off.” He stated nonchalantly. You shuddered as he pulled down on your ear slightly in emphasis. “If you can get your finger hooked over someone’s ear, all you’ve got to do pull down on it suddenly. Pull hard enough and it’ll tear.” “Ew.” You scrunched your nose up in disgust, though you tucked that piece of information into the corner of your mind, just in case. Kit threw one of his legs off you, his weight lifting from you as he rolled off your body. You took your chance, your arms flinging around his neck as you sat up abruptly. The two of you clumsily wrestled with one another and you were finally able to push Kit back down again with a laugh. He looked up at you, blinking in question. You giggled. “And I didn’t even have to rip your ear off.” You said triumphantly. “I was getting off you anyway-” You cut him off by placing your finger on his lips. Kit’s head fell back onto the floor beneath him in exasperation as you leant forwards, your hands braced on his chest. You closed the distance between your faces, your lips meeting his momentarily. Kit lifted his head slightly for you as you hummed happily onto his mouth, his hands snaking onto your hips. You pulled away as he tried to deepen the kiss, causing him to scowl. “I’m on top.” You insisted, pushing his head lightly by the forehead so that it was once again rested on the floor. “So?” He questioned, his voice turning suddenly idle as his hands roved from your hips to your lower back, his fingertips cold as they ventured under the back of your shirt, his nails scraping against your skin tantalisingly. “I don’t need to be on top of you to be in control.” He explained lowly. You opened you mouth to question him further when his hips rolled once beneath you, his body lifting in just the right spot and rubbing against you. The words fell from your lips at that single electrifying touch, a low groan working its way up from inside you instead. Kit smirked beneath you, his hands abandoning your back and instead coming to clasp your thighs. His grip was strong as he pushed you slightly further down his body, his arms flexing and his semi-hardened dick eager to brush against you once more. Pulling you forward slightly, his hands held firmly onto your thighs as he used your body to rub against him, your own excitement mounting each time he pushed you back over his steadily hardening cock. It didn’t take long before you began to timidly recuperate the action, moving softly against him as he lazily pushed and pulled you over him, the rough material of his pants tormenting you as it scraped against the softness of your centre again and again. “God,” he mumbled, his voice steady as he repeated his ministrations once more. “I can feel how wet and hot you are even through my pants.” You hummed in agreement, your head tipping back and your fingers weaving into the fabric of the shirt on his chest. “Are you gonna help me out with that?” You questioned, your voice slightly shaky as he stopped moving beneath you. “Well,” he began in contemplation. “I think you’ve done well today. So yes.” You groaned at his words, his hands wrapping underneath your thighs and tapping them. You did as he silently ordered, shifting forwards onto your knees and lifting you ass off Kit’s hips. The sudden loss of contact was almost painful but you didn’t utter a sound as Kit shimmied his body beneath you, maneuvering himself quickly so that his face was lined up with your clothed pussy. You ached to lower yourself to his face but you didn’t dare move as his hands slowly began to trace from your ankles, up your calves and to your thighs, scared that he would suddenly change his mind and leave you aching for him. You exhaled as his fingers suddenly found the material covering your pussy, deftly moving both your pajama shorts and panties aside. The cool air as Kit finally exposed your centre made you shudder. He blew softly onto you, watching intently as his simple action coaxed even more wetness to gather and glisten on your folds an inch from his lips. At your desperate wiggle of your hips, Kit connected his tongue to your slit, drawing a leisurely line from you opening to your clit. His touch was painfully light and you strained against your own want to collapse fully onto his face and deepen his touch. He repeated this simple motion again and again until your hissed his name in desperation. His responding chuckle rumbled through you and he finally dove fully into pleasing you, his nose pressing into your wetness as he worked his tongue thoroughly, dipping inside of you and roving around your folds with such vigour that your knees began to tremble. Your hands found his hair, your fingers gripping onto the soft strands and pulling persistently in a way that made Kit groan against you. You pulled more harshly in an attempt to spur him into exploring you deeper, a series of high-pitched gasps and grunts falling from your mouth in quick succession as the familiar ball of warmth began to grow in your abdomen. Suddenly, Kit’s tongue left your pussy and you were thrown to the side with a grunt. The world flipped once more and you blinked at the ceiling as Kit shuffled over to you, trying to make coherent sense of what was happening in the sudden loss of pleasure, Kit’s weight once again settling onto your hips. His face appeared above your, a little smile of his lips, your wetness shining on his chin. You threw your head back with a groan, trying to wiggle your hips in order to gain some friction from his body above yours, desperate for release. “Kit.” You whined in frustration, meeting his self-satisfied gaze. “Throw me off again, and I’ll consider letting you cum.”

[gh0styyt0astyy]

"You can hide from me forever~?" .. emm.. maybe you can do this we hank?(lee hank if it is ok?) No presure

✨ [Run and hide] ✨

( anon. anon *holds ur shoulders* i loved this prompt thank you )

———————————

⭐️ [Summary] — If you asked Hank how he got into this situation, he’d much rather die than say anything. (Lee!Hank and Ler!Deimos + Ler!Sanford)

fellas is it gay to platonically cuddle your homies after they absolutely wreck your shit

key: deimos hank sanford

⭐️ [Warnings] — TICKLE FIC; MILD LANGUAGE; AND CUDDLING AT THE END; if you don’t like then please just scroll on T_T

⭐️ [Prompt(s)]: “You can’t hide from me forever!”

✨ Enjoy ! ✨

— — — —

“Haaaaaank!” Deimos’ gruff voice echoed down a hall; a quiet snicker in his tone as he looked for the merc. Hank, who was currently staked out in a dark room (had the rooms always been this dark? How’d he never notice this?), held his breath.

Putting a hand on the doorframe, Hank leaned out slightly and stared into Deimos’ back.

The shorter guy seemed to be too busy with looking in the complete wrong direction that Hank started calculating his options. Hank had been stalking around this shitty “apartment” that he, Dei and Sanford all called home (Temporary home at least. It’s hard to keep a stable base of operation in this shitty, genocidal state okay?) for at least an hour now. Deimos wanted something from Hank; and whatever game Deimos was playing the taller man didn’t want any partake in it.

“Cmon, Haaank. You can’t hide from me forever now!” Deimos called out again, but beginning to turn around now. Shit. Hank quickly darted into a different room, one with a little more light. At least he could see now.

…However he failed to realize that Deimos could see the faint outline of a shadow, which is ironic really; seeing as how Hank; a 6’6 man can fit inside a tiny crate with no one noticing, yet he forgets to cover his tracks of a shadow.

Deimos’ footsteps came closer to the room Hank sheltered in, and Hank started to crawl backwards to the closet. ‘Shit- shit- shit.’ Hank opened the closet door and quickly stepped inside. Deimos suddenly leapt into the room, a sound of vague disappointment rumbling in his throat. “Damn.”

Hank felt a very light breath leave his chest as he slowly slid down the wall. Maybe Deimos had finally given up his chase. As Hank waited for Deimos to leave the room, he listened to the quieting footsteps. The goggled man silently opened the closet door and looked out, spotting no sign of Deimos. He began to slowly step out of it.

His legs were quickly and suddenly swiped out from under him, causing him to land roughly on his chest with a solid “oof” and a wheeze when something plopped heavily onto his back. “There you are!” Hank could hear the grin in Deimos’ voice.

“Uagh- get off of me you lug.” Hank grunted, reaching back and swatting at one of Deimos’ knees. “Hank, you’re good at hiding, know that? Had me in circles for an hour! You ever play hide and seek when you were a kid?”

Hank was having none of it as he continued to swat and push at Deimos. (Sure the man was significantly shorter than him, but damn; bitch could put some weight when he wanted.) Deimos hummed as he put his head in a hand. “Okay well obviously you wanna move on. So let’s do that! While we’re at it…” A different hand went down to between Hank’s shoulder blades, causing the merc to tense. “Let’s chat! You remember how you crushed my cigs a bit ago?”

Hank did remember that.

“Aaand how you spilled water on me for no reason?”

Hank remembered that too. (And, also Deimos, for your information; it was not for no reason you will NOT burn down another temp home.)

“Oooh or- or how about the time you threw that huge ass centipede at me? Remember that one?”

…Hank remembered that one, as well. Very vividly, might he add.

Hank nodded and Deimos did too. “Yeah. I remember all those too. Especially that last one you asshole.” Hank shrugged. “I mean, it was a little amusing.” Deimos feigned hurt as he put a hand to his chest. “You wound me, Wimbleton.”

Hank started to get antsy now, as he shifted underneath Deimos’ weight. “Will you get off me? Or are you just going to keep me here.” Deimos grinned again. “Antsy, Hanky? Daw okay. I guess I can get on with it.”

“It?” What the hell was “it?” Hank narrowed his eyes under his goggles and when he tried to look back at Deimos three fingers suddenly dug into the soft area between Hank’s shoulders. Oh. Oh that was it. Hank felt his eyes suddenly shoot open as he fell completely limp to the floor, electricity running up his back. His body shuddered with repressed… laughter? Noises. “Deimos—“ Hank spoke through gritted teeth, feeling lucky for the mask covering his betraying face. “Hank.” Deimos answered back. Hank felt himself trying to writhe away from Deimos to no avail. “Shihit.” He hissed, mentally cursing himself.

“Ahha! That’s the response I’m looking for!” Deimos said, taking his other hand and tapping against Hank’s ribs. Making the downed man make a strangled noise into the crook of his elbow. “Pihihihiss ohohoff-!” Hank growled, tried to growl. It was hard to be intimidating with fingers wiggling on your ribs and your back. Deimos was slow, methodical for a moment… before the hand on Hank’s back went from slowly moving to clawing at his shoulder blades. “SHIHIHIT! Deihihihimos you sohohon of a—!” Hank suddenly erupted; Deimos letting out a victorious and satisfied laugh. “Right here is bad? Damn, and I’ve only just started!” Hank tried thrashing his shoulders to get away from Deimos’ hands.

Deimos snickered mischievously, repositioning himself on top of Hank and sitting on his waist instead. “Y’know what Hank? This is super interesting,” Deimos said, one hand continuing to torture Hank’s shoulder blades as the other hand trailed back and forth from his ribs and his sides. “You’re, like, Nevada’s most dangerous Mercenary. And yet I haven’t even been thrown into a wall!” Deimos added, grinning at Hank’s misfortune as the man went limp again. “I hahahahate yohohou—“ Hank hissed through gritted laughter. “Have you even tried getting me off?” Deimos ignored Hank’s previous statement. As Hank began to lift himself with his elbows, Deimos’ hand suddenly shot underneath him and started prodding at his stomach. “YOHOHOHOU BIHIHIHIHITCH!” Hank fell back down.

That’s when a quiet *ahem* and knock on the doorframe made both the men look up. Sanford stood there, leaning against the frame with his arms crossed and an amused look. “Dei, what are you doing to Hank?” He asked, and Hank felt Deimos’ hands slow down until they came to stop. Deimos snickered evily and put a knee on Hank’s back to keep him down. Hank didn’t like that, didn’t trust that evil giggle from Deimos— so he began trying to escape. “San, y’know what I found out?”

Oh shit. He wouldn’t. “What’d you find out, bud?” Deimos you’d better not. “Did you know that Nevada’s most wanted, dangerous Mercenary is ticklish?” That son of a bitch. “Oh, really now?” Goddamnit.

Sanford was waved over by Deimos, and the two started whispering to each other. Hank tried to listen in but to no avail. Suddenly the weight on his back was lifted and Hank tried to shoot away quickly.

But he was grabbed around the waist and pulled back into a heavy chest. Sanford’s arms held onto him tightly as they went back to the floor, except now Hank was sitting up. (Which was better, actually, because being sprawled on the floor like that really isn’t comfortable.) Sanford’s arms were hooked under his, crossed tightly against his chest and keeping him in place.

Deimos was sat at Hank’s legs, grinning at him with a look that could only mean chaos.

“I swear to God.” Hank rumbled, pushing against his captors. Deimos gave an evil chuckle as his hands curled into claws. “Deimos I’m warning you.” Hank pushed at Deimos with his foot, neither of them really acknowledging the now dirty shoe print on Deimos’ jacket. “One.” Deimos said.

…Excuse him?

“Two.” Sanford’s low voice followed.

Hank started wriggling in Sanford’s arms with a little more strength.

…

…

“THREE!” Suddenly both the men yelled— and Hank lost his shit. Deimos’ clawed hands tasering into Hank’s ribs and Sanford’s kneading into his hips. “OHOHOHOH MY GOHOHOD! YOU AHAHAHASSHOHOHOHOLES!” Hank suddenly shrieked in laughter. (It was so much louder than his voice, louder than his usual tone. It surprised all of them and Hank wasn’t sure if he liked the volume coming from himself.) Hank writhed in Sanford’s arms as he fought against himself. “Holy shit! Dei, you weren’t joking!”

“I know! Hank, you’re incredibly lucky that it’s just us who know about this!”

Hank thought about the idea of someone else finding out about…this. Whatever “this” was. Hank wanted to say something but all he could get out was that loud, wheezy laughter. And eventually he stopped trying to fight it, he went limp in Sanford’s hold and gave in. “SHIHIHIHIT! I’m gOHOHNNA KIHIHILL YOU TWHOHOHO!” You know, it’s really hard to be threatening when you’re being undone. His nerves felt like they were being electrocuted and were on fire, Hank’s legs kicked slightly. “GOHOHOD DAHAHAHMN IT! MOHOHOHOVE YOUR HAHAHAHANDS!”

Suddenly it stopped— Deimos’ hands stopped at least. Sanford’s were at his ribs now, poking and prodding between each bone. Hank screwed his eyes shut; Sanford’s hands were so slow and methodical it was driving Hank up the wall. Hank’s face was warm, completely undone to giggling. It was embarrassing.

“San, you wanna know something else?” “Deimohohos.” “Hit me, Dei.” “You behehtter nohohot!” “Hank’s scars are way more ticklish than the rest of him.” “You bihihihitch!”

That bastard. “Reaaaally now?” Sanford’s voice was low again, close to Hank’s neck. Deimos nodded. “Yuh uh.” Hank tried to squirm out again. “I hahahate you!” He listened as Deimos drew in a big, deep breath and felt as his shirt was lifted. (He knew today was a bad day to go without his jacket.) “Deheheheimos I swear to Gohohohod!”

Hank had literally no time to process anything before—

PBBBFFFTRRTTTT!

“OH SHIHIHIHIT! SHIHIHIHIT SHIHIHIT SHIHIT!” Hank squealed, he squealed. (Hank never wanted to die on the spot more than in that moment. Do you think that he could find Jeb or Tricky or someone to strike him down after this?)

Deimos had raspberried Hank’s stomach— against a huge ass scar that went from his left hip, over top and across his navel and to the right side of his ribs.

And Sanford had started blowing smaller raspberries against Hank’s neck, again, on the scars that went across it.

Hank literally felt like he was about to die in that moment. “OKAHAHAHAY! OKAHAHAHY I YEHEHEHEHILD! I YEHEHILD! I’M GONNAHAHAHA DIHEHEHEHE! STOAHAHAHAHAP!” Hank gasped, writhing and kicking his legs. And it was like that, the sensations just stopped. Phantom feelings buzzing through his body and against his skin. “Ohohoh my gohohd.” Hank breathed, his body somehow going limper against Sanford’s. Deimos grinned and Sanford laughed lightly. Hank felt Deimos press against his chest and a light squeeze of a hug from Sanford.

Hank panted lightly, cursing the two mentally. Deimos just grinned up at Hank. “Sooo. I think San and I win!” Sanford hummed in agreement as he nodded grinning too as he bonked his head against the back of Hank’s. “Somehow that went way better than I had expected it to go.”

“You two better sleep with one eye open tonight.” Hank threatened, feeling his body physically relax against Sanford and Deimos. “Yeah yeah, whatever you say.”

[star-lemonade]

Private Video (1/2)

A.C.E Donghun x Reader

Cw: smut, asmr

Rating: R

Word count: 3.2k

Not betaed. thanks to @silent5tar for reading it ahead of release <3

“I heard your channel is doing well.”

Sujin smiled over the edge of her mug. She had never really understood the appeal of ASMR, but she still supported your endeavors.

“Yes, it is. Next month I will invite you to dinner.”

“Oh, so you really make some money?”

Sujin raised one eyebrow. A look that fit her face well. Even in situations like this her words never came out accusatory.

“Not really, but I can take my best friend out for dinner anyways.”

She smiled as the waitress came with your cakes. No, the youtube channel did not really make money, if you consider the cost of the microphone and filming equipment but it was a good pass time. The feedback from people in the comments felt good too.

“Ah! I remembered something.”

Sujin leaned forward as if people in the cafe would pay attention to your conversation. Of course no one was looking at you.

“Do you remember Donghun?”

Yes, you did remember him. Donghun was Sujin’s ex-boyfriend’s friend. Well, friend is maybe said too much. They had attended some of the same classes and Donghun had hung out with him, and by extension you, sometimes.

“I do. What’s with him?”

“He asked for your number.”

That was surprising. You had talked a few times but mostly you had been there for Sujin, to spend time with her. Why did he want your number now?

“Okay. Why tho?”

She shrugged. At least she had not just given out your number to anyone who asked. A bit more information would have been though.

“No idea.”

You thought about it. Technically you knew him so it was not like you would give your number to a stranger and if you did not like where the conversation was going you could still block him.

“Okay, give him my number then.”

A few days later Donghun asked you to meet him for coffee. The place was in a particularly hip part of town. Every coffee shop here was the picturesque backdrop for some influencer’s instagram post.

You entered the shop and looked around. Donghun was nowhere to be seen. You got yourself a coffee and sat down. The place was cozy with its assorted armchairs and low tables. It would be perfect to come here and read a book. It was not too loud either at the moment at least. You sank into the soft cushions. The armchair felt like a lot of people had previously sat in it. The seat had sunken in the middle but it was still okay. A shadow appeared in your periphery.

“Hi, how have you been?”

A soft voice asked from the side and you jerked up. Donghun had arrived. His dark brown hair fell into his eyes as he smiled, looking down at you. He took off his jacket and hung it over the armchair opposite you. The jeans and plain black sweater looked stylish on him.

“I’m good thanks for asking.”

“Good to hear. I will just get a coffee too.”

He joined the queue for the counter. The coffee shop was not very full at the moment, most people just got a drink to go and left again. Donghun looked different from the last time you had seen him. His hair was longer and dyed a warm shade of brown. The small piercing in the side of his nose was new too. It gave him an even more soft, pretty feeling. He looked like one of those instagram influencers that you followed for their cozy aesthetics and beautiful faces. You wondered if he had a public instagram account and if yes, how many followers did he have. I would follow him. You made a mental note to look for his account later.

He returned with a mug of coffee and sank into the soft armchair.

“So, why did you want to meet me?”

“Ah, yes it’s been a while.”

He looked down at his mug that he held in his hands. Several delicate metal rings decorated his fingers. You could also see a bracelet peek from under his sleeves.

“I have seen your videos and I love your channel.”

“Oh, so you are a fan.”

Your tone was teasing and Donghun smiled.

“I guess so.”

Not a lot of people you knew had much interest in what you did on your channel. Most had never even seen an ASMR video. Sujin had watched some when you started but it was not something that she needed in her life.

“What are your favorite videos then?”

Let’s see if he really watched them or not. You had not done that many videos over the past year or so, maybe 30 videos, but you had enjoyed making them. He leaned forward a bit as he spoke.

“I really liked the one with the lid sounds. Those containers from lush sound really good.”

You nodded.

“Oh and the long one. I listen to it while working.”

Ah yes. The long one. The 3 hour monstrosity had taken forever to edit together. You had made some mistakes and it delayed the whole schedule you had set for yourself. It felt good to hear that your work was appreciated.

“There is actually something I wanted to ask.”

He leaned forward and met your eyes.

“I would love to try it too. Recording a video I mean. Would that be okay with you? Maybe you can publish it, if it’s good?”

So this was his ulterior motive. It made sense. The equipment was pretty pricey so, if you do not know, whether or not you really like recording, it would be better to try first with someone else’s microphones.There was no harm in letting him play around. You seized him up. Donghun would look good on camera, you were sure of that. Personally you only showed your face very few times. It was enough to have good sound and nice close ups of the objects. One thing about him stood up to you the most.

“I think I have an idea for your video already.”

“Oh, really?”

“Yes, how is next Saturday for you?��

You set up your filming equipment in the small living room. Well, more like the room had become a set and had ceased to be a living room. You had built a soundproof box out of plywood and sound absorbing foam. While it was technically removable, most days you just let it stand there. It was simply too bothersome to move it elsewhere.

Donghun arrived on time. He rang the bell and you let him in. Just as you had told him, he wore an off white sweater. There were some colors that had to be avoided when filming videos, because they did not look as good on camera. The background in the sound proof box was black so this would make him stand out.

“Hi, can I offer you something to drink?”

“A cup of tea, if you have it.”

While you made tea for both of you, Donghun inspected the set. A chair was surrounded by three walls of sound foam. The camera and the microphone were plugged in to your computer and ready to go.

“Here.”

“Thanks.”

He sat down on the chair as there was no other place for him to sit that was not the floor. He blew on his tea.

“So, what have you planned for me.”

“Have you ever seen a hand sounds video?”

These kinds of ASMR videos featured a person rubbing their hand together in different ways. You enjoyed listening to them a lot and while you would have loved to make one yourself, the thought of having people look at you hands that closely made you uncomfortable. Okay, maybe they were doing that already but it would be even more intense.

“Oh. Yes, I have. You think I will be good at that?”

“You have nice hands, so…”

Now that you had said that out loud it seemed a bit odd. As if this was something inappropriate. It implied that you had looked at him. He held up his hands and inspected them. Pretend like that wasn’t awkward. He nodded.

“So, when do we start?”

You closed the blinds on the windows and began to adjust the lighting. Donghun looked really good. His skin had a healthy tone and the long hair, freshly washed, shone in the lights. He had rolled up his sleeves, but you wondered if taking the sweater off would be better.

You gave him a monitor - some earbuds - so he could hear himself while recording. He started to test the microphone and looked surprised at the sound. You could not hear the sound of the microphone but it was okay. You would watch the recording a bit later. Donghun rubbed his fingers together and experimented with speeds. His hands were graceful and you could not help yourself but stare. Even if it was disguised as monitoring the recording.

“Can you come over I wanna try something”

You walked over to him, wondering what it was. He took your hand and pushed the sleeve of your shirt up. While close to the microphone, he ran his palm over your arm. A shiver ran down your spine. His hands were a bit more on the soft side and the way he rubbed your arm, even if unintended, put you on edge. It had been some time since you had had a partner and this felt almost too intimate.

Thankfully Donghun did not notice the effect he had on you because he was focused on the sound only he could hear. You controlled your breathing as it would be audible on the recording. Please stop being so handsome. The faint smell of shampoo and freshly washed clothes tickled your nose. It made your stomach drop.

Okay, but is it possible that I am developing a crush on Donghun right now? That was totally possible. You had always found him kind of attractive, but you had never spent that much time together.

“Are you okay?”

His voice was soft, only audible because it was so quiet. It brought you back to the present.

“Yes...yes! Sorry I…”

You cut yourself off. Don’t mumble. His fingers pressed lightly against the palm of your hand. Almost like holding hands but not quite. He got up, not letting go.

“Can we take a break?”

“Sure.”

You were very aware how close he was and of his fingers gently holding your hand. His eyes were a warm shade of brown that reminded you of chocolate.

“Let’s go then.”

A trip to the coffee place around the corner gave you a bit of time to sort your thoughts. Maybe you should ask Donghun if he was looking for a girlfriend. If he was, you could ask him out. There was no point in denying you felt something for him. Now, the only question that remained was, how could you ask subtly about his relationship status. You could not bring yourself to just ask. What if you made it awkward? What if he laughed in your face? No, you wanted to do it, indirectly. You would come up with something.

After you drank your coffees, you returned to the apartment. Donghun recorded for about two hours. You would have to cut some parts where a truck drove by or where the neighbors talked too loudly but it had looked good.

“Awesome, you did a good job!”

It was true you really liked the video and sounds you had recorded. You set the earphones down and looked up at Donghun.

“Is it really okay if I upload this?”

From a legal standpoint you could not simply upload someone else’s face to your Youtube channel. So you had to ask.

“Yes!”

He beamed as he put on his jacket. You did not want him to leave but could not think of a reason to make him stay. Donghun must be tired. Sitting in the chair for so long was surprisingly exhausting. You knew that from experience.

“Awesome.”

You saw him to the door. Donghun standing in your door was something you would like to see again. When he came back that was.

“It was fun recording today! Thank you for letting me do this.”

His smile was a ray of warm sunlight.

“No problem. I had fun.”

He stood in your door and buried his hands in the pockets of his pants. I bet the hair feels as soft as it looks. It looked like he wanted to say something, probably goodbye. The time was now.

“Would you like to grab a coffee sometime?”

He looked a bit surprised but a smile appeared on his face.

“Yes, I would like that.”

“Good.”

Your heart had skipped a beat when he had said that. Hopefully it would not be too long before you met again.

“See you around.”

The video with the title “Hand sounds with my friend” was a big success. Comments and likes poured in all day. One of the most upvoted ones read:

“I loved the part you did together. Can we get a part two? 😘”

The thought of Donghun running his hands along your skin was dangerous. It had felt so good. It had been two weeks since you had filmed the video but the memory was still vivid in your mind. The tickling of his fingertips brushing over your arm. The warmth of his hands and the smell of his hair were still there. You wanted to run your hands through the soft hair, wondering how it would feel. His head would tilt up and he would look up at you with those sparkling eyes. Maybe he would kiss your hands. Kiss your arm. Kiss your lips.

Your phone vibrated and you jerked from your daydream.

“Hey, do you wanna get dinner tonight?”

Donghun. As if your thoughts had summoned him…

“Sure, where do you want to go?”

Was this a date? You did not want to ask if this was a date or not. No need to make things awkward.

About 20 minutes before you had to leave for your maybe date, you stood before your wardrobe and weighed your options. The nice dress may signal your interest but could also be perceived as overkill for a casual date with a friend. Wearing a simple jeans and sweater or cardigan combo might seem too much like you were not interested and saw this more as a “friends going out to eat” situation.

You put on the dress. It showed way more cleavage than you remembered. You did not feel comfortable enough to wear it today. Jeans and cardigan it was. As fast as possible you changed.

In order to relieve some nervousness you went to the bathroom and started putting on makeup in record time. Usually you were too lazy to put on makeup but in situations like now it felt like armour. Whatever may happen today at least you looked your best.

The worry you had had about a look overkill dissipated, when you saw Donghun. He wore black suit pants, a white dress shirt and a cream colored blazer. A black silk shawl was tied like a ribbon around his neck instead of a tie. Your dress would have looked down right shabby next this. Donghun looked absolutely stunning.

“Hi!”

“Hello!”

He smiled a small smile. It made your heart jump.

You opened the glass door and entered. The restaurant was not very fancy and Donghun seemed out of place. One of the tables in the back was free and he walked towards it with unwavering steps.

He sat down and you took the chair opposite. You busied yourself with choosing something to eat. The laminated pages of the menu made your fingers even more sweaty. It’s not necessary to be this nervous. Calm down. But look at him! Is he playing a prince in a drama or something. Who shows up to a dinner with a friend looking like that?

It was true, he looked extra good today. The only logical reason seemed to be that he saw this as a date. Maybe it was a good idea to signal your interest.

“I really like your outfit.”

He looked down as if to check what exactly he was wearing.

“Ah, yes. Thanks. I was taking photos with some friends earlier.”

“Oh.”

You did not realize that you had said that out loud until he gave you a questioning look. Pretending to be suddenly very interested in the menu you looked down and hoping your blush was not visible.

The waiter took your orders and left. You still felt awkward and avoided looking at him by looking around the room. Some of the older men at the other table were clearly talking about Donghun. He, however, was not bothered by the way people looked at him. In general it seemed like not a lot could dampen his confidence. One time you had hung out with Sujin, her ex and some more friends, you had played some game. Your recollection of the night was not very good but the result of the game - or was it a dare? - was that Donghun had to put on one of Sujin’s crop tops. He wore it for the rest of the night even when you went to a club. Now that you thought about it, this was actually something you admired about him.

“I don’t think i have asked, but what do you do for a living?”

Donghun had mentioned working but you did not remember what it was that he did. As it turned he worked as a system administrator at a company not too far away. On the side he had an instagram account with a few ten thousand followers. Not a huge following but definitely something. You pulled out your phone and searched for his account.

“I will stalk your account later.”

“But don’t like all the old posts or people will notice.”

Eyes sparkled mischievously and you laughed. The few photos you had seen looked exactly how you had expected. All of them had a hard to describe coziness to them. Like the one of Donghun sitting in bed with a mug.

“How have you been doing?”

The food had arrived and you felt more relaxed around Donghun. He obviously did not think this was a date so there was no pressure on you to look your best. It was a bit disappointing but also a relief. You talked about your work and how you thought about changing jobs.

“Would you quit if your channel was making enough money?”

“hmm.”

You had thought about that before but reality was complicated.

“Right now i’m just doing it for fun but if it was a matter of paying the bills, I don’t think it would be as fun.”

Donghun nodded.

“It’s not very stable.”

“That too.”

If your channel did very well and you quit your shitty, but stable job, you would have to worry more about what videos would do well instead of enjoying what you do.

“Ah, speaking of the channel, I wanted to ask you something.”

Donghun looked up from his plate.

“The video we recorded did really well and people asked for another. Would you like to make another video with me?”

[marvelousmarvelimagines]

Christmas Kisses

Pairing - Stucky x Reader

Summary - You had never been a Christmas person, but thought this year might be different now that you were with Steve and Bucky. Your insecurities about your relationship seem to be getting in the way though. Thankfully the two are there to reassure you. 

Word Count - 1,427

AN/Warnings - Yeah, no one requested this, I just wanted to write it. Hope you enjoy anyway! The tiniest bit of angst with a fluffy ending. 

Christmas parties weren’t your thing before you joined the Avengers, and they weren’t now either. Christmas had never been your thing. You hadn’t had a family to share them with, and you had always been more of a Halloween person. You thought for a brief moment that this Christmas might be better because now you did have a family, and two wonderful men that you called your . . . well you couldn’t call them anything right now. Nobody could even know you were dating. 

But here you sat, in an ugly Christmas sweater with Santa bent over a tree and showing off his thong that Tony had provided, sipping on some spiked eggnog while you watched Bucky and Steve happy and smiling as they had a conversation with Tony. 

They could show their affection for each other, everyone knew about the two of them. You were the one that nobody knew about, and you hadn’t expected it to hurt that bad. You understood why they wanted to wait, make sure that the fallout that would come from this being released to the public wouldn’t knock down what the three of you had built, but . . . you were sure it wouldn’t. Now you were starting to wonder if you were the only one. 

“You look about as miserable as I feel.” Natasha said, appearing beside you. She was wearing a sweater with two gingerbread men fighting that said “ginjas.” 

“Is it that obvious?” You asked, sliding your finger around the rim of your cup. 

“Holidays got you down?” She asked, and to your pleasure, pulled out a flask and began pouring what smelled like straight whiskey right into your drink. 

Shaking your head, you waited until she was finished, and then took a big swig of your even more spiked drink. “Men,” You replied once you had swallowed. 

“Well, in that case,” She proceeded to pour even more in your cup. “Wanna talk about it?” 

You didn’t know if it was the liquid courage that Natasha had given you, or if it was that you’d been holding these thoughts inside of you for so long they needed to come out, either way, your words came up like word vomit. “Do you ever worry that you care more about . . . someone than they do about you? Like they’re embarrassed to be with you?” You figured it was stupid to ask that of someone as beautiful as Natasha, but to your surprise, she nodded. 

“A long time ago. Everyone has at some point. If they care about you though . . . They won’t care about the consequences.” Natasha told you with a knowing look. 

For the briefest moment, you couldn’t help but wonder . . . did she somehow know? But then you shook it off. That was impossible. “What if the consequences could be bad though? Like change so much -”

“Doesn’t matter. They’ll know it’s worth it. Especially when it comes to you. I mean look at you -”

You gave her an incredulous look, glancing down at the hideous sweater, and back up at her. 

“Okay, well maybe not right now, but any regular guy - hey Barnes! Come over here!” 

There was no way anyone could miss the panic in your eyes as Bucky pulled himself away from the group he had been chatting with and made his way over in his sweater, which said, “Kiss me under the mistletoe” with mistletoe and an arrow pointing to his crotch on it, giving you a curious look as Natasha gestured him over. 

“Speaking from a general male perspective . . . wouldn’t you say that this is a gorgeous woman right here?” Natasha asked him, making heat flood up to your face. 

Bucky’s voice was gruff when he responded. “Of course.” 

“And you, or any male, that made her feel like they were ashamed of her must be an idiot that doesn’t realize what he has, right?” Natasha asked, and the conversation seemed much more serious than it had a few moments earlier. 

His gaze drifted to you for the briefest moment, and you looked down at the ground, embarrassed. You hadn’t wanted to have this conversation like this, and now you were forcing him into an uncomfortable position. “You’re right, she’s amazing, and anyone would be lucky to have her.” You looked up at him at those words, but he was already backing away. “I’ve got to go talk to Steve, I’ll catch up with you guys later.” 

“Well, that was weird.” Natasha said, giving you another look. 

You began chugging your eggnog as you glanced over at Steve and Bucky who had stepped away and were now in deep conversation. “You know what? I’m tired. I think I’m going to go ahead and turn in. Merry Christmas, Nat.” You said, giving her a small smile and hug as you stood up. 

Before you could leave though, someone called out your name, and you had to bite back a groan as you realized it was Tony. “Hey! No! You can’t leave yet!” 

“I’m tired, Tony!” You called over your shoulder. 

“I’ll walk you out.” You froze for a moment as Steve walked up beside you in his bright blue sweater that said, ‘I have a big package for you’ with a naked Santa, and put his hand on the small of your back. You looked up at him and saw the reassuring smile on his face and felt the smallest bit of tension release from your shoulders. 

“Okay,” you said, your voice soft as he began walking you towards the doorway. 

“Hold up! Mistletoe!” Clint called out from somewhere behind you. 

The two of you looked up at the same time and there it was, right above your head. You were already shaking your head as you looked back at Clint. “Ha, ha, no. Steve is taken. I’m not doing that.” 

“I don’t think either of them would mind.” Steve replied with a twinkle in his eyes, and you didn’t even have time to process those words. In seconds, Steve had wrapped one arm around you, the other on the back of your head, and pulled you into a passionate kiss. 

As it always was when kissing either one of them, your mind went blank, only able to focus on his lips and how soft and plush they felt against your own. You parted your lips at once when you felt his tongue and arched your back into him, sighing against his lips as he kissed you until your head was spinning and your breath was short. “You do realize what you just did, right?” You mumbled as he rested his forehead against yours. 

“Oh, we’re not done yet, doll.” A voice said from behind you, pointing up at the mistletoe once more. “It’s my turn now.” 

This time there was a smile on your face as Bucky leaned in to kiss you, and you couldn’t help but giggle as he bit your bottom lip. In response he reached down to cup your ass in his hands and lift you into the air, carrying you out away from the prying eyes. 

“We all saw that right? That happened? It wasn’t a group hallucination?” You heard Tony ask right as Steve shut the door. 

“You two realize they are all going to know now, right?” You said, when Bucky pulled away, a bit of worry in your tone as you looked between the two of them. 

“We know, Sweetheart.” Steve said, glancing at Bucky for a moment, then turning back to you and brushing some of your hair behind your ears. “We’ve been talking about telling them for a while. Would have sooner if we had known what you were thinking.” 

“I should have said something.” You admitted, tightening your legs around Bucky’s waist as he held you closer. 

“It’s all right,” he said, pressing a kiss to the underside of your jaw. “We’re all still learning here. Even the old dogs like us.” Bucky joked, tickling at your sides until you started swatting at him. 

Steve cut both of you off wanting to stop you from play fighting. “All right, you two, I think it’s bedtime.” 

You rolled your eyes. “Of course, we wouldn’t want to miss Santa.” 

He raised his eyebrow at you, a playful smirk on his lips. “Who said anything about Santa?” 

Bucky and you shared a glance, and then he started sprinting down the hall towards the elevator, you giggling in his arms at the amused and fond look on Steve’s face as he watched the two of you for a moment before running to catch up.

[hollyxqx]

BAD FRIENDS  ;  MIN YOONGI  ;  ONE

↪ PAIRING: reader x yoongi / reader x seokjin ↪ GENRE: friends to lovers to enemies to lovers, 90s!au, college!au, angst, smut, hurt, comfort, FLUFF ↪ SUMMARY: hooking up with your childhood best friend was never your plan, but neither was falling in love with him either. he’s troubled but his heart is gold. when you move away for college, things start to take a turn.

↪ WARNINGS: TW! mentions of alcohol&physical abuse, yoongi’s dad is a terrible human, minor descriptions of violence, smut, explicit sex, recreational drug use, but despite that there is a lot of love and fluff, so much pining between these two idiots in luv

↪ WORD COUNT: 20k (it’s a big one!!!)

series masterlist

It Began As A Mistake

The shared wall between your houses is far too thin, you often think. You hear a lot of what you’re not supposed to. The mask the Min family next door displays to the world is shattered for you every night when the raised voices and banging starts.

You expect Yoongi will be requesting your company soon, if the shouting and screaming through the wall tonight is any indication to go by. It’s a pattern that has become more frequent, especially as of late, but has been going on for as long as you could remember.. It’s routine now. 

Not that you mind. Yoongi is your closest friend. The longest relationship you’ve had with any other human being (aside from your parents) is the one you share with Yoongi. You met him the day you moved in next door at the tender age of eight. He had been playing in his front yard, throwing and catching a basketball against a hoop attached to the brick wall of his house. You don’t remember much about the first meeting other than laughing at his enormous oversized shirt that reached his knees. 

According to your mother, it was a fast friendship. By the end of that first day you had proudly declared to her that Yoongi was your bestsest frien. She always recalls the story with a fond smile on her face, given how much she adores him. As an only child, Yoongi was like the brother you never had. And that’s how the relationship continued. Innocent and almost sibling-like.

Until it wasn’t. 

The memory of the first time you slept together is hazy. You don’t know exactly who initiated the first move but in the moment it made sense, as if it was the right thing to do. Yoongi had snuck out, climbed in your bedroom window as he usually did when he wanted to escape his turbulent home life and made himself at home in your room.

He had never been particularly vocal when it came to expressing his emotions. That was just Yoongi; silent, stoic, strong. It was only with you that he would allow himself to even be marginally vulnerable. Occasionally the veil would slip ever so slightly and you’d get a peek of the turmoil underneath and every time you did, you wanted to take that pain away from him any way you could. 

So when you held him in your arms and he murmured into the skin of your neck how much you meant to him, you knew you would do anything for him. Which is why when his lips found yours you kissed him back. When he slowly removed every item of clothing you wore, you let him. When he fucked you on your childhood bed, slowly and purposefully, you granted him access to your body. Whatever Yoongi wanted, you allowed him to take from you.

If it meant bringing some happiness and light into his life, it was worth it. You loved him, after all. 

As if on cue, you hear a quiet tap on your window. You look up from the book that you were unsuccessfully trying to distract yourself with to see Yoongi, peering at you underneath a mop of shaggy black hair. When you notice him he gives you the briefest of smiles, but you can see in his eyes he’s anything but happy.

“Figured you’d be over soon.” You say quietly as you push the window open to let him in. “He’s bad tonight, huh?”

You were referring to Yoongi’s father. The center of the hurricane of chaos that is the Min family. Mr Min had a serious drinking problem, and whenever he had one too many it was like he transformed into someone else entirely. Mrs Min and Yoongi took the brunt of his wrath. Although Yoongi never outright said it, you had long since deduced the violence his father inflected. Mrs Min had ‘walked into a door’ too many times for you to count.

“He’s an asshole.” Yoongi mutters, kicking off his sneakers. “I waited until he passed out, there’s no way I would leave that monster alone with Mom.”

“You wanna talk about it?” You ask, scooching over to make space for him on the bed beside you. He shakes his head ‘no’ as he flops face down on the mattress. Rarely does he want to open up. He lays on his front, head resting on the back of his palms. “I’m sorry Yoongi.” You rub his back affectionately.

“You should be, I cut my hand climbing up the trellis.” His muffled voice replies. “Maybe invest in a rope ladder for me.”

“Noted. Now let me see your hand.” 

Yoongi allows you to look at the small cut on his hand. It’s nothing serious but you go and fetch a plaster from the medicine cabinet in the bathroom anyway. On your way back to your room you pause outside your parents bedroom and listen. Their television is off, which means they must be asleep. As much as they love Yoongi, catching him in your room after hours would probably not go down well.

“Thanks.” Yoongi mumbles once the band aid is secured. “Can I sleep here tonight?” He asks quietly.

“You don’t need to ask” You tell him this every time, but he never listens. Instead he pulls you into his arms, holding you tightly as if you’re the only thing tethering him to reality. He may not pour his heart out to you but his need for affection, for love, is clear when he holds you like this.

“I had such a shitty night.” He says into your skin, face buried in the crook of your neck. His breath tickles. “Just wanna forget it.” He presses a kiss to your throat. “Wanna forget everything that’s not you right now.”

Your stomach involuntarily somersaults at his words. He’s not romantically interested in you.. You know this.. He’s your best friend. In the two years you’ve been sleeping together you’ve worked hard to keep any feelings at bay, but when he says things like that, your heart races. Your phisiolocical reaction betrays your head. 

It’s not the same for Yoongi and you know that. He doesn’t get butterflies. He’s just blowing off steam. It is why you constantly remind yourself about the reality of the situation. It’s just sex. If you even allow yourself to think otherwise for a moment you’ll get carried away and that can only mean one thing; the end of your friendship.

He leads you back to the bed, laying you down on the mattress before his lips are on yours. Yoongi is a phenomenal kisser, a fact you're reminded of when he nips at your bottom lip before sliding his tongue in your mouth. It’s slow and passionate, something you’ve grown to love about his kissing style. He knows just how much to give and take.

You’re hot all over from his touch. His roaming hands caress your body, his touch gradually growing more desperate. It’s heavy breathing and grinding and intense. Like he can’t get close enough to you. “Yoongi,” You pant as he pulls your shirt up and over your head. 

“Hmm sweetheart?” He asks distractedly, eyes on your now naked breasts. The pet names only ever come out during sex. Leaning forward he cups them in his hand, kissing all over your chest. He takes one of your hardened nipples in his mouth, swirling his tongue over it, sending electricity straight down your spine. His mouth is sinful.

“I-I don’t have a - “ You moan a little when you feel his clothed hardness press between your legs as he moves to your other breast. Your hands fly to his hair, anchoring him to your chest.“Yoongi, I don’t have any condoms.” You manage to get out. 

He carries on what he’s doing but hums against your flesh, “Did we finish that pack already?”

“Y-yeah.” You stutter as he kisses his way down your navel. Yoongi hooks his thumbs in your shorts and drags them, along with your panties, down your legs. He kneels between your thighs and grips an ankle in each hand, bending your legs up and outwards and open. “I meant to pick some up.”

“Hmm,” Yoongi replies, once again distracted as he settles down on his chest between your spread thighs. Most of your hook ups begin this way. He reads your body so well now, after two years of doing this together he has every tip and trick down to a science. Spit sloppy kisses land on the soft meat of your inner thigh before his tongue makes it way in between your lower lips making your breath hitch.

He loves having his hair tugged and pulled whenever he’s eating you out, so your hands wind themselves through his dark locks. He grunts at the contact but still takes his time even as you tug on his hair, encouraging him. “God, Yoongi.” You whine quietly and breathlessly. “Feels amazing.”

His hands hook underneath your thighs, legs resting over his shoulder,, pulling your mound closer to him as his tongue begins to flick faster against your clit. It’s so hard to be quiet when he plays your body like this. You clutch at the sheets beneath you and a pillow simultaneously in a hopeless attempt at remaining silent.

“Look at you,” Yoongi breaks away, peering up at you through his bangs. There’s a dark desire in his eyes and your arousal on his lips. You can’t help but wonder if he loves the control aspect of making you feel good. “I can tell you’re barely holding it together. Fuckin’ needy for me. Do you want to cum like this? Or with my fingers too?”

“No.” You whisper and he quirks a skeptical brow.  “I want to cum with you inside me Yoongi.”

“We don’t have condoms.” He reminds you, languidly licking a stripe up your pussy, eliciting a shudder out of you. He slips one arm back underneath your leg so fingers can toy with the outline of your entrance. “As much as I’d love to feel you...I’ll get some tomorrow for us.”

You let a muffled cry as he slips a finger inside of your wet heat, curling it expertly. “A-ah, Yoon -” You gasp as he pumps it slowly. “I’m on birth control.”

His motions come to a frustrating hault. “Since when?” 

You had been on it for a while, not because you were having a lot of casual sex but just for your the sake of your period (something you didn’t feel like would particularly interest your best friend). Yoongi and you had long since established practicing safe sex so you carried on using condoms. “A few months.” 

“Are you...are you with other people?” He asks and you can’t believe he’s asking this with his fingers literally inside you. 

“Yoongi I’ve never been with anyone other than you.” You inform him quietly. He’d never known that he was the one who took your virginity. At the time you were so embarrassed to be the only one of your friend group still carrying their v-card, though looking back that was such a ridiculous thing to worry about.

“Really? Not even Jimi - “

“Don’t even say his name to me.” You cut him off abruptly. Jimin had been your boyfriend when you were a teenager, who ended up cheating on you. “No. Are we going to do this because I’m slowly starting to get turned off here.”

“I’m sorry sweetheart.” He gives you that same lopsided smile that makes your heart thud. Slowly he leans down to reattach his mouth to your still hyper sensitive clit before resuming fucking you with his fingers. “You’re the only one I’ve ever been with too.” He mumbles so quietly you almost miss it if it wasn’t the tickle of his hot breath against your sensitive flesh.

For some reason that turns you on more, knowing that this moment, this feeling, you’d only ever shared with each other. 

Your tightening around him, walls clenching as he brings you closer and closer to orgasm, chest heaving as you try to catch your breath enough to whine, “Yoongi I’m close, please stop, please, please let me cum on your cock.”

He pulls away with a smirk. “How could I say no when you beg so prettily?”

Yoongi reluctantly tears away from you and stands briefly to shed his clothing. They’re tossed uncaringly to the floor before he crawls over you, wedging himself in between your legs. When his bare cock brushes against your hot cunt you shiver. It’s electric, raw and thrilling at the same time. You can practically feel yourself dripping on to the sheets below.

Your lips brush together, before he whispers a warning with a laugh, “I’m probably going to cum really quick.”

“You better not.” You tease, closing the distance between your mouths with a searing kiss. Yoongi continues lapping at your mouth as one hand nudges your thighs apart a little wider. He grips the base of his cock, lining it up at your entrance before dipping the head of it in painstakingly slowly. 

“Ok?” He breathes against your cheek as he inches the rest of himself in slowly. You nod eagerly. When he’s sheathed all the way inside of you he groans, a little too loudly for your liking. 

“Yoongi!” You whisper shout, clamping a hand against your mouth. “Be quiet!”

He licks the inside of your palm and you squeal at the ticklish sensation,  yanking your hand away which was his goal. “Now who's the loud one?” He tries to joke but his voice is deeper, hoarser, husky,  like he’s trying to hold back from just pounding you into the mattress.

“Move, Yoongi.” You nudge your hips upward slightly, desperate to feel him,, causing him to bite down on his lip in pleasure. 

“You feel so fucking good.” He whispers in your ear as he slowly begins to rock his hips against you. “So fuking wet, so fucking warm.” He keeps his face next to the shell of your ear. “So tight for me sweetheart.”

He rests on his forearms as he begins to pick up speed. Together, after all the practice you’ve engaged in, you’ve both long since learned how to fuck quietly in your bedroom. Tonight however Yoongi seems to be losing himself more than usual. Both of you stop instantly the second your headboard hits the wall with a thud, staring at each other in fear.

After a few tense moments of waiting to ensure no one in your household has woken, Yoongi mutters a low apology before carrying on thrusting. 

“I’m close, Yoongi.” You whisper, pushing his chest up slightly so you’re able to reach down to your neglected clit. The other hand finds purchase on his shoulder. “Ohhhh,” You moan squeezing your eyes shut. You can feel Yoongi’s dark gaze on your face. Knowing he’s watching is undeniably hot. 

“Baby cum for me,” He pants. “Please, I’m so close. Wanna feel you squeeze my cock while I fill you up. I’m gonna cum in you, claim you, make you all mine.”

You’re not even sure if he’s aware of what he’s saying but it does the trick and you feel that tightly wound coil deep within you let go, and you’re coming hard around his cock. He’s gasping and swearing when he follows seconds later, slowly grinding against you to a stop.

He all but collapses against you. His skin is hot and sweaty and sticks against yours. In other scenarios it would be disgusting but you relish in it, pulling him towards you for a kiss. He tastes salty and sweet.

“Shit, that felt too good.” He chuckles breathlessly after a few moments. “I’m sorry it was so quick.”

“I loved it.”

He’s still panting when he pulls out,, rolling onto his back next to you. “What?” He asks when you start to giggle.

“Your cum is leaking out of me and it tickles.” You grab his hand and put it between your thighs. “Feel.”

“You’re gross.” He laughs but you know he doesn’t mean it when he pecks you on the cheek shortly after.

“I’m going to go clean up.” You inform him, as you awkwardly dress and make your way to the bathroom. 

When you return once again Yoongi’s semi dressed and partially under the duvet cover, patting the mattress signaling for you to join him. You clamber into bed beside him and he instantly wraps his arms around you with a yawn. “I set your alarm.” He tells you.

This is standard routine for you two so he’s able to sneak back out again undetected in the morning. You nod against his chest. As he stretches across you and flicks the bedside lamp off.

“Yoongi?” 

“Hmm?” You can tell he’s close to sleep already. 

“Will you tell me if you sleep with anyone else? I don’t want to go back to condoms but I don’t want an STD.” You shyly share. It would be a shame not to be able to have him again, raw and unrestricted. 

“Of course. I’d never put you at risk like that.” He replies sleepily. “You’re my best friend, dummy.”

“You’re the dummy, idiot.” 

“Shut up and go to sleep.” He says. You can tell from his voice he’s smiling.

It’s your last day of high school but unfortunately not the last one of your part time job as a barista at the coffee shop you work at. It’s a nice place, but it’s boring. There’s still three months left until you hopefully are leaving town for the college of your choice (in the city, you hope with all of your fingers and toes crossed for luck). Nothing terrifies you more than being stuck in your hometown. Life is for the living.

After school you head straight for your shift. Normally your shifts pass by pretty quickly but today this one drags in. You know you have a few letters watermarked with the symbols of colleges you applied to waiting at home, courtesy of an excited call from your mom to the shop. 

You have little idea what to expect, resulting in an anxiety ridden few hours of work. Driving home it takes everything in you not to speed. 

“Here, here, here!” Your excited mother is thrusting a stack of different sized envelopes into your arms. You hadn’t even put your keys down or removed your jacket yet. 

“Give me a second, jeez.” 

The nerves you feel bubble ominously deep in your gut. You try not to let it read on your face as you shrug your jacket off and toss your keys in the bowl. If anything your mother may be more excited than you. 

“Well, open them darling.” She’s practically vibrating with excitement, a wide lipsticked smile stretched across her face.

Taking a deep breath you walk to the living room. You may have to sit down for this. 

The first letter is small. The smallest one. The return label indicates that it was from a music school in Incheon. One of the choices higher up on your list. A quick scan reveals - “I got in!!!!” You shout as you stand up. Mom’s cries of joy and affirmation fall on deaf ears as your heart thunders.

By the time you’ve confirmed your acceptance to Yonsei and Seoul National your mother is crying. Last, but certainly not least is the letter to Hangyang Uniersity. Out of all your applications, Hangyang was the only place Yoongi had applied to also. The prospect of potentially going to school with him excited you.

As soon as the black and white printed ink confirms it - we would like to offer you a place on our applied psychology course - you audibly gasp. You can’t wait to tell Yoongi.

Neither Mr or Mrs Min usually arrive home before 8pm. Mr Min is a math teacher, who often works long hours before heading to a bar, whilst Mrs Min is a nurse; so when you bounce out the front door and to the house next door you know Yoongi will be home alone.

“Yoongi!” You singsong before you’ve even reached the door, knowing there’s a chance he may be able to hear you. “Yoongi-yaaa!” You knock obnoxiously on the oak, almost as if you’re tapping out a tune. “I know you’re home, your bike is in the drive!”

The door creaks as it opens, a disheveled Yoongi appearing on the other side. “I was napping.” He grumbles, tousling at his fluffy hair. You can’t help but think he looks adorable. 

“Do that later.” You tell him, with a playful eye roll. “I got into Hangyang!”

He barely has time to blink before you’re launching yourself at him, slinging both arms around his neck. It takes him a moment to react before a reluctant arm returns your enthusiastic hug. “That’s great, y/n.” He says into your hair before you seperate. 

Yoongi shuts the door behind you both. “And?” You can’t help but ask.

“And what?” He mutters walking past you and to the kitchen. You trail behind like an excited puppy.

“Don’t you ‘and what’ me. What about you? Please tell me you got in too.”

He freezes as he’s reaching for a glass. “I don’t know.” 

His words do little to kill your buzz. “What?” You laugh, assuming he’s joking. “Today is the deadline. How can you not know?”

“I just don’t, ok.” He flips on the tap and fills his glass up with water, the entire time keeping his back to you. Something is up, you’ve known Yoongi nearly your entire life. He’s withholding something. He was always the type to act defensively when he was mad, hurt, lying or all of the above.

“Yoongi, we can call the university and find out. Maybe your mail is just late.”

“I don’t want to, y/n.” He says curtly.

“Why?”

“I just don’t!” 

“You’re being so weird right now,” You frown. “Don’t you want to find out if we’re going to be going together? We’ve talked about this for years.”

“I’m not being weird. I just don’t know yet.”

“You are.”

“Just fucking drop it.” He groans, slamming his glass on to the counter with enough force that the water sloshes up over the edge. 

“Don’t talk to me like that! I have done nothing wrong!”

Finally he spins to face you, a neutral almost bored expression on his face. “You’re making a big deal out of nothing.”

“I - “ You cut yourself short, feeling a little foolish that he doesn’t seem to be as thrilled at the prospect of going to college with you. He hadn’t brought it up in a while. “I thought - thought you’d be excited. Nevermind.”

At your tone his expression softens. “Y/n, the idea of getting out of here with you sounded amazing.”

“Sounded?”

He lets out a drawn out sigh and stares at the ground. “I can’t go.”

It’s almost as if the air has been sucked rapidly out of the room. “Can’t?” You parrot back. This was the first you’d ever heard of this.

“You know what my situation at home is like. You know better than anyone. I can’t just up and leave.” He’s always hesitant, ashamed when speaking openly about what goes on behind closed doors. Even to you.

“You can, Yoongi.” You go to touch his arm for reassurance but he shrugs you off. 

“I can’t.” He grits. “I can’t leave her with him.”

“Yoonseok did.” You counter. It’s a low blow bringing up his older brother but it’s the truth. Yoonseok hightailed it out of there the second he turned sixteen, leaving eleven year old Yoongi to manage his dad alone. Yoongi’s childhood had done a number on him, burdening him in a way no child should ever be. 

“Yoonseok was a selfish dick.” He responds darkly, voice dripping with hate. “Without me, or anyone, to intervene my dad will fucking end up killing my mom. We both know it y/n.” Silent and unsure how to respond to such an uncomfortable truth you can only stare sadly at Yoongi. It’s painful to see him sacrifice so much for a family that didn’t deserve it. “I can’t leave her. It’s not safe,”

“I understand Yoongi, I do. But you can’t put your life on hold forever for your parents. At some point you need to get out, not just for your own safety but your sanity.”

“Yeah then come home to a dead mom. Great idea y/n.” He spits. “Don’t be fucking stupid. This is the reality of my situation.”

“I just want what's best for you, stop being an asshole!” You yell.

“You’re being controlling and quite frankly, kind of a cunt.” 

You scoff humorlessly in disbelief. “Really Yoongi?! Fuck you. And fuck this.”

Spinning on your heel you march towards the front door. This argument was going nowhere and you would only grow angrier if you remained in the tiny kitchen with him. One glance over your shoulder and you’re met with his glassy eyes watching you leave, the last thing you see before you slam the front door. 

Three days later you and Yoongi are still not speaking, equally as stubborn as one another. You know he’s been avoiding you because you haven’t even seen him in passing, a rare thing when your houses share a wall. So you avoid him too. Fuck him for making you feel bad when all you do is adore him, support him, care about him.

He hasn’t even attempted to apologise. If you really try you might be able to hold on to this anger for a week.

That’s the longest you’ve ever gone without speaking. And it was for something so juvenile you can’t even recall it to this day. Also, you were both twelve and kind of dumb. So you figure a week is your limit. That’s the longest you’ll go without talking to Yoongi. 

Tonight makes it particularly difficult when you hear a deafening crash and a thud. You pause, mid page turn of a book you were devouring and listen. The silence that follows is deafening. 

But then you hear it. The extremely distinct raised voice of Mr Min. It’s unclear exactly what he’s shouting but the tone is enough to send a shiver of fear through your entire body. There’s another raised voice that’s unmistakingly Yoongi. Your heart clenches at the sound of him. 

They continue like this for an uncomfortable length of time. You wonder what your parents think about this. Although it’s not a secret in your household you never exactly sit down and chat about what you hear through the walls with them.

When it goes silent you don’t relax. You gaze at the shared wall you know is Yoongi’s bedroom, almost as if your hard stare can penetrate the bricks and mortar. A selfish part of you hopes he comes over tonight, as per routine. You don’t indulge in each other’s bodies every time but you know even just your company is likely the only form of affection Yoongi gets and you want to take care of him any way you can. 

This thought takes you to the window, where you unlock the latch, expecting him hopefully soon. 

He doesn’t come. 

Yoongi lays on his bed, staring blankly at the ceiling. It’s not the water stain or the old outline of a where playboy poster used to be (he had snuck it out of Yoonseok’s collection and stuck there when he was a kid) that is captivating his attention. It’s the sound of his mom crying in the bathroom next door that’s keeping him awake.

His father had passed out a little while ago, thankfully. But not before smashing a glass dangerously close to his mom’s head and then pushing her so hard against the wall a hole appeared in the drywall. Yoongi had helped his mom clean up a few of the cuts and scrapes before she sent him out of the bathroom, claiming she wanted to wash up before bed. Her crying is breaking his heart.

Selfishly he wishes you could hear this.If you heard this you would understand in a heartbeat why he can’t leave. His mom is vulnerable. He knows you hear some of what occurs through the wall but it’s nothing as devastating as the muffled sobs his mom chokes back. The sound of a broken woman.

It makes him wonder how on Earth Yoonseok could just walk away from this and feel nothing. He hasn’t spoken to his brother since as a result. Through his Grandma he has a vague idea where Yoonseok is (doing odd jobs here and there in the city) but he doesn’t wish to know more than that. Hate is a word he reserves only for his father, but what he feels for Yoonseok is close.

He sighs, emotionally and physically exhausted, as he rolls onto his side. It’s been almost two weeks since he last saw or spoke with you and right now all he wants is to crawl into your bed and hide in you. Bury himself inside you while you clutch at him desperately. A world away from the pain and loveless home he’s trapped in right now.

He wants you so badly to be the bigger person, to be better than him like you always are. To come and find him, to sense that he needs you. He wants it so badly he aches.

Before his key is even in the door, Yoongi knows to anticipate a Bad Night. Not that the typical bad nights are easier but Bad Nights with a capital B and M are worse. He can hear his father before he even sees him and knowing that today was a weekend, and therefore a day off from work for his old man it means he’s been drinking since sun up.

He hesitates, key hovering over the lock. He could just turn away right now and pretend he had to work late. Dealing with his father’s abuse is literally draining the life out of him. For a moment he considers it, really considers it. Then he hears his mom cry out with agony. Yoongi unlocks the door.

“Mom?” He calls out as he crosses the threshold inside.

There’s a wail, followed by a whimper coming from the living room. He follows the sound. 

He’s greeted with his dad hovering over his mom who is cowering against the wall, looking smaller and frailer than ever. Something inside Yoongi snaps. With as much force as he can he shoves his father away from her. Drunk and already weary on his feet, the older man stumbles backwards a few steps before falling. 

“Are you okay?” Yoongi extends his hand to her. Shakily she places her palm in his and he helps her stand. This does not please his father who is yelling obscenities as he struggles to get to his feet. Yoongi glances at him over his shoulder and he can sense the shift in the room. “Mom, go upstairs and lock yourself in the bathroom. I’m going to talk to Dad.” He says sternly. 

“Yoongi,” She cries softly but one look at his expression and she knows how serious he is. Fearfully her eyes flicker to where her husband is, as if he somehow has the final say. It angers Yoongi like nothing else. 

By now Mr Min is standing, albeit swaying and his expression is murderous. “You shouldn’t have done that. This has got nothing to do with you stupid boy.”

“Fuck you, old man.” 

He isn’t thinking, rage is pulsing through his veins and all he can see is red when he swings a right hook at his father, fist making direct contact with the older man's jaw. Fight or flight instinct kicking in with brute force. He’s never thrown a punch before in his life. 

It takes a few dazed seconds for his opponent to recollect himself. His father looks at him with such disgust, almost as if he can’t recognise the boy standing in front of him is his own flesh and blood. Someone he was supposed to raise, protect and guide. 

Normally, he knows better than to talk back. Normally, he knows better than to get physical with his dad unless it's in defense of his mother. Normally he knows better. And now, the look in Mr Min’s eyes tell Yoongi one thing; he’s going to severely regret it.

This is your first taste of what feels like a life without Yoongi and it’s bitter. 

Fifteen days come and go with no sign from your best friend. The world feels a little emptier without him and it’s a sobering thought, that one day he might not be in your life. This realisation lights a fire under you and you decide to swallow your pride and take the first step towards reconciliation. It’s ridiculous. You and Yoongi don’t fight. It’s both of you against the world, the way it has been since you were kids.

Knowing he’s home alone again (both parents' cars are gone) you slip out of your house and make your way to his. This is probably the first time in your entire life you've ever felt nervous to see Min Yoongi. And not in a good way.

Knock knock.

You’re holding your breath as you wait and listen for signs of life from within the bricks. Silence. You knock again. 

Have five minutes passed or fifty? It’s an eternity waiting out here for Yoongi. When you’re about to turn to leave, the front door slowly creaks open. “Y/n?” 

When your eyes meet you inhale a sharp breath of air in, shocked. He has an angry black eye, swollen and purple. There’s a cut on his lip and the flesh around it is an inflamed shade of red. You don’t have to ask. You know where this came from. 

“Yoongi.” Is all you say before stepping forward and wrapping your arms around him. It’s a depressing parallel to the last encounter you had with each other. He’s silent but he returns your hold, burying his face in your hair. He inhales deeply as if it’s comforting somehow. “I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry too.” He replies hoarsely.

“I understand why you do what you do for your mom.” You mumble into the soft cotton of his hoodie. “I just want you to be happy is all.”

“I know. I’m sorry for snapping at you.” He squeezes you a little tighter, planting a kiss on your head. 

“Please don’t ever go that long without talking to me again.” You say separating enough so you can see his face but still very much holding him in your arms. “Especially when things are this bad.” He smiles weakly and holds up a pinky, chipped with black nail polish. You link yours with his.

“Promise.” He assures.

As usual you ask - “Do you want to talk about it?”

He says nothing as he pulls you inside, lacing your hand with his. You think you know where this is going. Yoongi wants to feel loved. 

He leads you up the staircase, it groans under the weight of the two of you but otherwise the house is silent. Yoongi’s room is the first one on the upper landing, the mirror of your own bedroom in your house. The door still has a few posters of bands he had once loved and a worn logo sticker of his favorite basketball team. 

There’s a small twin bed almost identical to yours, except his is donned with a navy blue bedspread and doesn’t include the small mountain of assorted pillows that yours does. He always teases you about them, often joking he’s going to steal one and that you’d never notice. 

It’s quiet still as he leads you to the bed, sitting down first and scooting upwards until his back is flush with the headboard. “We don’t have to do anything.” He says softly as you mimic his actions. “I just missed you.”

Sometimes a person just needs someone to hold them, and you have no problem being that someone for Yoongi. Gently you pull his head to your chest and idly play with his hair, just how he likes.  A content sigh parts his lips. “I missed you too.” You tell him. “Do you know how much I wanted to run over here and tell you that Jimin came to my work, ordered a coffee, then tripped and spilled it all over himself?” 

Yoongi huffs a little laugh and you’re glad to make him smile. “Wish I’d seen that.”

“Next time don’t be a dick and maybe you could have.” You tease, knowing Yoongi has a penchant for frequenting your work for free coffee and sticking around, especially on slower days. He pinches your side playfully, although still hard enough to make you yelp. 

“I’m not a dick.” Although you can’t see his face you can hear the pout in his voice. “You live my life and then let’s see how stressed out you are.”

You were only teasing but his comment causes your heart to sink all the way to your toes. “I know you’re not.” You sigh, running your hands through his hair. “You can lean on me as much as you need. I’m basically your family at this point, Yoon.”

“Family.” He scoffs as if the word leaves a bitter taste in his mouth. “What’s that?” 

“People around you who love you.” You tell him firmly. You want to add on ‘i love you’  but the boundaries between you and Yoongi are so blurry now even you don’t know in exactly what context that would mean.

A comfortable silence settles after that. You almost wonder if he has fallen asleep, given the steady rise and fall of his breathing. You don’t know what comes over you but you pick his hand up, lacing your fingers together. He often paints his nails (you have always taunted he’s too goth to be a basketball player) and you’re examining the polish. The black paint is chipped and you stroke his index finger with yours softly.

“What are you doing weirdo?” Yoongi’s voice startles you and you freeze. 

“Your nails are totally chipped.” 

“Duh. Haven’t had time to fix them.”

“Can I paint them for you?”

He cranes his neck and gives you a confused look. “...Why?”

You’re not entirely sure yourself and you shrug. Maybe you just feel guilty and want to do something nice for him. “Okay.” He agrees slowly, still entirely not convinced but still leans forward so you can stand up and grab the bottle of polish, remover and cotton pads from his dresser. Everytime you come in his room you marvel at what a neat freak he is, everything is always so organised. 

“Black?” You confirm the color. He nods. 

You set your items out on the bed, this time opting to sit opposite Yoongi, facing him. To get close enough so that he doesn’t have to stretch his arms out uncomfortably you’re basically sitting in his lap, legs entwined. Gently you talk his palm in yours and begin to wipe away the remnants of the old paint. 

“No one has ever painted my nails before.” He chuckles. Your eyes meet and you can't help but smile. 

“That’s another first time milestone of yours I’ve taken.” Your expression turns into a wide grin. Yoongi rolls his eyes. 

He’s not delicate by any means (despite the bruises) and you don’t know why you’re treating him as such but delicate is what you are when you clean all ten of his nails. You can feel his burning gaze on you as you work; it spurs you on to do a good job. 

The room smells toxic, the fumes of the remover and the nail polish nearly make your eyes water. “Can I open the window?” You ask after the smell gets a little too much. Yoongi nods and you quickly hop off the bed and pop the frame open. The instant wave of fresh air clears your head. 

He’s watching you with a peculiar look on his face that you can’t help question but he brushes it off. You return to your earlier position and continue your handiwork. You can’t help but smile and admire the first nail, disproportionately proud of your newfound skill. Yoongi laughing ruins your moment.

“What exactly is so funny?” You question, quirking a brow. 

Still laughing he shakes his head. “You’re cute.”

The blush that creeps up from your chest to your cheeks is hot and there’s no way Yoongi doesn’t notice. He’s never really complimented you like that. In fact, he rarely says anything about your appearance, negative or positive. Occasionally when he’s mid way through fucking you something will slip out but it’s meaningless when he’s seconds away from an orgasm and not thinking clearly.

“Oh.” You mutter dumbly, trying to ignore why that makes you feel tingly inside. You carry on with your task at hand. When you’ve finished the second coat, you take him by the wrist and blow on his fingers, as if that’s going to do a whole lot to speed the drying process.

“Uh..” Yoongi makes a noise that sounds almost sexual in nature and you peer up at him with a perplexed look as you continue blowing. “This is such a douchey guy thing to say but when your mouth makes that shape....and it kinda gives me goosebumps when you do that...it reminds me of every time you’ve ever sucked my dick.”

“Oh my god.” You laugh, throwing your head back. “Seriously?!”

He nods, looking half amused, half ashamed. “They’re pretty memorable, you know.”

“Good to know.”

After his nails are dry and you’ve tidied up the mess you join him back on the bed. “Thank you.” He says, pulling you on his lap before you even have a moment to process what just happened. You straddle him, hands on his shoulders, staring intently at the injuries on his face. You brush a thumb along his bottom lip. 

“I like doing things for you.”

Yoongi holds your arm firmly in place, pressing a kiss to your thumb then bringing your hand to cup his face and planting a kiss against your wrist. His larger hand rests atop your hand, keeping it there and he nuzzles into you. There’s a palpable tension and the air suddenly feels too thick. It’s almost hard to breathe. As you get lost in his eyes it feels as if the world around you has vanished, leaving only you and Yoogi, in your own private universe. 

You lean in closer. His breath ghosts your lips. You’ve missed kissing him so much.

Then, the front door slams.

“Shit.” Yoongi flies up so quickly it’s a wonder you’re not thrown to the floor. “They’re home.” His parents are earlier than expected. 

“I’ll sneak out if you distract them?” It’s not that Yoongi’s parents don’t like you, they just a: wouldn’t approve of you being over unsupervised and without permission and b: the less fuel you can add to the fire the better. Mr Min will look for anything to be upset with when it comes to his son. 

“I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t apologise. Just go.” You push him towards the door. Before he leaves he turns to you and asks -

“ - See you tonight?”

Yoongi’s in - dare he say it - a good mood when he sneaks out later that same day. His dad passed out early (a rare but welcome occasion) leaving the Min household in a relatively peaceful state for once. Slipping out the front door, armed with a box of his mom’s homemade cookies that you love, he makes the short trip to your bedroom.

A knuckle taps quietly against the window and he can’t help but grin when he sees the excitement in your eyes. After all you had unfinished business from earlier. You bounce over to the window wearing that cute lilac pyjama short set (the one that makes it hard for him to concentrate) and let him inside. 

“They’re still awake.” You whisper, holding a finger to his lips when he goes to speak. He nods in understanding, aware you mean your parents.

“For you.” He matches your hushed tone as he passes you the box of cookies. Your eyes light up with delight and a tiny gasp leaves your lips.

“My favorite! Your mom must have been in a good mood today to be baking.”

“Dad went to bed early, so..” He shrugs.

“Thank you.” You put the box on your desk and engulf Yoongi in a hug of gratitude. 

His hands are cold when he slides them beneath your flimsy camisole, wanting nothing more than to feel your naked skin. He kneads the flesh of your bare hips under his hands before dragging his nose along the juncture of where your collarbone meets your neck and inhaling. The scent of you, your skin and your body wash was comforting and arousing. 

He wonders sometimes if you truly knew the effect you had on him as his lips ghost over your skin with the briefest of touches. He wants to drown in you. This is the only place he’s ever felt safe. 

You exhale a shaky breath that sounds a lot like his name. He pushes your hair over your shoulder allowing his lips to roam your decliotage freely. There’s not a part of your body he hasn’t kissed, he thinks. He laves his way up your throat and meets your awaiting mouth. He can taste your strawberry lip balm, a taste he will forever associate with you.

You whisper between kisses that he has to be quiet (as always) but intrigue him when you push him towards the white wooden chair that matches the desk. He sits down and you swing a leg over his lap so you’re straddling him, a more intimate version of how you were on his bed earlier. 

“This is new.” He hums, hands stroking up and down your sides. 

“Can’t have the headboard crashing into the wall again now can we?” You giggle, pushing some of his hair off his face. 

Yoongi agrees with a smirk, gaze roving over your willing body. He strips you of your camisole, before devouring your breasts, taking one in each hand and grazing a thumb over your quickly hardening nipples. His lips find purchase on your neck once more. It’s almost sinful how you’re already grinding shamelessly against him. 

“Stand up and take these off.” He commands, snapping the waistband of your little shorts to punctuate his point. Quickly you shed the clothing, kicking them off. Yoongi’s cock is aching a little now, having been pent up for a few hours now. He hastily shoves his sweatpants down enough for his member to spring free.

When you’re seated on his lap you moan in pleasure at the feeling of his hardness against your bare pussy. “I’ve missed you.” You breathe, rocking your hips enough so that the tip of his cock brushes through your lips. He shudders at the combination of your voice and sensation.

His hands can’t seem to decide exactly where he wants to touch you. One has a handful of your ass, encouraging your movements and the other is palming at your tits. Then when you beg him to touch you he knows exactly where his hands want to be.

A sense of pride washes over him every time he feels how wet he makes you. There’s a thrill in knowing he’s the only one who has ever made you like this. The only one who has ever touched you like this. His thumb circles your clit slowly. He watches you with ravenous eyes.

Your soft whines just make the ache to be inside you increase tenfold. It’s so much better than any dirty movie he’s ever seen. It’s real and it's for him. “O-Oh, Yoongi.” Your head falls forward, resting on his shoulder. “I’m ready. Please. Just want you. It’s been too long.”

The fact that two weeks without him was too long for you does nothing but inflate his ego. Rarely does Yoongi ever feel just this self assured. “You have me.” He whispers, positioning you over his swollen cock. Slowly you lower yourself onto him, taking him like the good girl you are. “Fuckkk.” He exhales when you’re completely full of him.

“It’s s-so much.” You choke. He knows exactly what you mean. This is a new position and a new angle for you both. As beginners to sex neither of you had the confidence or experience to experiment too much yet. With you speared on his lap, it’s deeper than he’s ever felt you before. 

His grip on your hips is bruisingly tight as he stills you for a moment. It’s overwhelming how good you feel and he already came far too fast last time. He bites down on the juncture of your neck and shoulder, eyes squeezed shut tight. 

Eventually he calms down enough to let you bounce on him. Your eyes threaten to roll back in your head, lids fluttering shut. His mouth hangs open and he knows he porbbaly looks so dumb right now but he couldn’t fucking care. Not with how unbelievably good it felt. 

“Yoongi,” You pant, laughing a little “You know I saw this in porn and wanted to try it.”

“Yeah - uh, wa - what?” He splutters, stilling you completely to ensure he heard you correctly. “Since when do you watch porn?”

“Last week the cable TV glitched.” You bite your lip shyly. “I may have watched some.”

“Fuck.” He growls, lifting you up and slamming you back down on his length. The idea of you watching porn, masturbating to porn and then thinking about him almost has him blowing his load immediately. God knows he’s thought about you countless times. Even before you’d had ever even had sex. “You have no. Idea. How hot that is.”

“Yeah? You think so?” You’re breathless, cheek to cheek as you whisper in his ear. 

“The idea of you touching yourself.” He groans. “Wishing it was me.”

“Of course I wished it was you.” You moan. “Think about you fucking me all the time. You can have me whenever you want me, Yoongi.”

Shit He’s so close to cumming already. Whispered obcenties tumble out from under his breath. Just as you’re starting to get too loud Yoongi covers your mouth with his hand but you grab his two of his fingers and suck them into your hot mouth, muffling your moan as you cum. The sensation of your mouth and your pussy is his undoing, and he explodes not even seconds later, cumming harder than he can ever remember. 

“You’re going to ruin me.” He pants, chest heaving. 

You laugh, pressing your sweaty forehead against his. “Not if you ruin me first.”

Weekday routine insists you always assist your mother with the after dinner clean up. When you were younger you were often (as your father put it - ‘deviously smart’) at inventing excuses to get out of chores. Now as an almost adult you, it isn’t such a hassle. It’s even nice to spend a little time talking with your mother. 

The relationship you have with your parents is the inverse of the one Yoongi has with his. It wasn’t until you understood the gravity of his situation did you really start appreciating them in a newfound way. You could be a bratty kid in your youth, like everyone but you thank your lucky stars you had a loving, safe environment.

“Careful with that plate darling, it’s china.” Your mom instructs as she hands you the dinner plate, knowing full well how clumsy you can be. 

“How about we just eat from paper plates now on? They don’t break.”

Your mom cracks a smile as she shakes her head. “When it’s your house you can make the rules.” She gives you a pointed look. After a few moments of silence she asks - “How is Yoongi? I haven’t seen him over in a while.”

You look away to hide the blush that floods your cheeks. He’s over nearly every other night, mother. Right under your nose.

“He’s fine. Same old, same old.” You sigh, stretching up on to your tip toes as you put the precious plate away. 

“Is he joining you at Hangyang in September?” You mom pries. 

Oh shit. You’d forgotten to tell her. “Uh, no. No he’s not.”

“Oh sweetie. I’m sorry. I know you two were looking forward to it. It’s a shame he didn’t get in.” 

“That’s not why.” You take yet another precious china plate from her to dry. “It’s his parents.”

“Oh.” 

You don’t have to elaborate any further. It’s not a secret in your home. Your parents aren’t deaf, they hear everything you do. “I wish he would leave them. He’s worried for his mom.”

A long, forlorn sigh leaves your mother. “Gosh when he was young your father and I would phone the police on the really bad nights.” She tells you with a shake of her head.

“What? Seriously?” This was brand new information to you. She nods.

“Mrs Min always defended her husband. Made us look like we were imaging things. It’s so sad.” Her eyes grow misty. “I don’t blame that poor Yoonseok for running away. At one point we even tried to adopt Yoongi, you know.”

“Fuck, really?”

“Language.” Your mother warns and you hastily apologise, desperate to hear more of the story. “Yes. He spent so much time here, it was like he was our kid anyway. We seriously looked into it, hired a lawyer and a social worker. But it was too difficult. Mrs Min stopped talking to us for a long time.”

“I had no idea.” You breathe, awed. Although the idea of Yoongi potentially being your brother makes you feel nauseous now, given everything. 

“Mrs Min is a nice woman. She adores her children but she struggles.” Your mom says empathetically. “As for Mr Min? He was the picture perfect father and husband for a good while when they first moved in. You were too young to remember.” 

“I wish I could help them.” 

“I know you do honey. If only it was so simple.” You mom smiles. “Yoongi is lucky to have you. That boy is welcome in our home any time, as far as I’m concerned. And tell him I was asking after him won’t you?”

“Of course. He’ll like that you were.”

Aside from Yoongi, Anni is probably the person you’re closest with. The juxtaposition between her and Yoongi is almost comical, like night and day. She is bubbly, fun and out-going; a stark contrast to Yoongi’s more foreboding and at times broody nature. Of course he was fun, but in such a different way. 

Anni somehow persuades you to accompany her to a house party. Your entire high school life you’ve only ever been to a handful. They’re not exactly your thing. But college is encroaching and that’s what you’re supposed to be doing there right? Partying, drinking, occasionally studying. So it doesn’t take a lot of convincing to get you prettied up and ready to go.

It’s Seyoon’s house that’s your destination, a guy in your year you’ve only spoken to a handful of times. The moment you set foot in the crowded building you already feel awkwardly out of place. As if your friend senses this she whispers in your ear, “You look great, don’t think so much.” while pushing you through the crowd. 

The first point of call is obviously alcohol. Together you do two shots each before grabbing a cup of something questionable. “Oh! There’s Soomin. Let’s go say hi.”

Soomin was Anni’s friend, someone you only knew by acquaintance. You spot her talking to a group of two guys and a girl you recognise but don’t know her name.  You instantly feel a little nervous, one of the guys is clearly older, and not to mention handsome. He looks like a model, beautiful dark hair coiffed perfectly. 

Soomin is very friendly and greets you both with welcoming hugs before introducing you to the group. “This is Yeona, her boyfriend Jongsuk and my cousin Seokjin.” 

“You don’t go to our school. You look like you spend your time in a drama as the male lead.” Anni teases Seokjin playfully. Of course she would be flirting right off the bat. He takes it in stride, shaking his head with a grin. 

“I used to. I just finished my first year at Hangyang Uni.” 

“That’s where I’m going next year.” You smile up at him. When he makes eye contact you blush like the school kid you technically are. 

“Really? That’s great. What are you studying?” He asks, stepping a little closer so he can hear you over the music. 

“I’m hoping to get my degree in Psychology and Sociology.” 

“Are you joking?” He laughs. At once you’re confused. You don’t exactly look like the studious academic type, and he doesn’t have to be rude about it.

“No…” You frown. “Why?”

“I’m a psychology student too. You’ll probably even be on the same campus as me!” He grins.

“Ohhhh, that’s cool! What are the odds?” 

“I know? Isn’t that so weird?” He laughs. 

“Do you enjoy it?” You ask, genuinely curious. That’s been a big fear of yours, worried you’ll begin your (expensive) further education and hate it. 

“I love it. I’ve always been interested in Psychology so learning from some of the best experts in the country is amazing.” He looks like a kid on christmas, eyes lighting up as he speaks. This guy might be model handsome on the outside but he is a total geek. It’s so endearing, you can’t help but like it.  “It’s a great school. You’ll enjoy it.”

By now the others' conversations have died out. Seokjin’s eyes dart downwards to your empty drink. “Want another?” 

“Yeah alright.”

“Come with me, I can tell you about all the cool spots on campus and what books not to buy.” He grabs you by the wrist as he says a quick ‘be right back’ to Yeona. Anni gives you a knowing smirk but you mouth ‘shut up’ at her. 

Hoseok’s sunny, cheerful demeanour is something Yoongi normally appreciates about his friend. Unless it’s used as a weapon against him, like it is tonight. This is how he finds himself sipping on a disgustingly warm beer in the corner of Seyoon’s vast living room, doing nothing more exciting than people watching. 

You had told him earlier in the week you’d been roped into attending. Maybe that’s why he’d agreed to go with less resistance than usual. If he was truly honest with himself he was scanning the room, hoping to find you and turn this night around. The few times you’d got drunk together were always fun. 

He spies Anni first, talking to a group of people, which means you can’t be far off. He knows you went with her. That’s when some movement catches his eye. 

Initially it’s the tall pretty boy who alerts his attention, but his gaze drops downward to see him leading you of all people somewhere, wrist firmly encaptured in his grip.

Something hot and prickly rises in his chest and his heart feels like it’s screeched to a halt. If he witnesses this strange boy take you upstairs he might just lose it. That’s what usually happens at these parties.

He exhales a shaky breath of relief when the two of you make a beeline for the kitchen. Although the adrenaline rush isn’t gone yet, his heart is still thundering his ribcage. Through a small gap in the crowd he sees you talking, smiling, laughing. You look like you’re having fun. He doesn’t want to ruin that.

“Do you want another?” Hoseok nudges him with his elbow, gesturing with his head to the nearly finished beer Yoongi clutches. 

He does want another but that would mean going into the kitchen, so he refuses.

“Come on, little MinMin.” Hoseok teases, using Yoongi’s least favourite nickname. He hates being called little, or tiny, or short. “I know you want one.”

“Fine but I’m staying here. Fetch it for me.” 

Hoseok sticks his tongue out at him before grabbing his empty bottle and disappearing with it.

“Me? No I’m not really into the partying side of college life but I can show you where to go if you are.” Seokjin has been sharing his wisdom for you for the last forty minutes. Evidently he’s learned a lot in a year at Hangyang. “I read books and chill. By myself.” He laughs and you join him. 

“It’s funny how we both aren’t the partying type and we literally met at a party.” You can’t help but chuckle, shaking your head at the absurdity of the situation. “Should we rejoin the others?”

Seokjin agrees and as you two exit the kitchen you see the back of someone’s head that looks a lot like Yoongi’s friend Hobi. You hesitate for a minute, attempting to decipher if it really is him or not when a subtle touch at the small of your back from Seokjin jolts you back into the present. 

“Come on.” He’s so unintentionally suave. It makes your heart beat just a little faster. 

Anni is animatedly telling the story of when you and her accidentally tried to give her white maltese dog Pricilla a bath and accidentally turned her pink with the wrong shampoo. “Your mom still hasn’t let me live that done!” You join in at the end. 

“Neither has Pricilla.” Anni grins.

“Please tell me you don’t have a dog.” Seokjin asks, grabbing both your shoulders in dramatic mock concern. “Please y/n, think about the animals!”

“I didn’t act alone!” You defend shooting a glare at Anni, who is playing innocent. 

“Well it’s a good thing you’re not allowed animals on campus.” Seokjin smirks. Anni gives you yet another knowing look. You can practically see the internal cogs of her brain whirring to life. Ever since Jimin she’s been dying for you to at least hook up with someone. Little did she know about Yoongi.

“You two should meet up when you’re both at school.” The look on Anni’s face tells you she’s assuming she’s doing you a favour, a gentle nudge forward in your romantic life. 

Before you can awkwardly deflect the question and give Seokjin an escape he answers first. “Yes we should, y/n. If you want.”

“Uh, sure.” You don’t see why not. As of now he’s the only person you know at Uni. It might make the transition a little more fluid. 

“Maybe y/n you can give him your number?” Anni meddles further. Oh god, you look so desperate now. You’re not interested in dating him and she’s making it seem like you are.

“I’ll have a different number when I’m at school.” You remind her. 

Seokjin reads between the lines, sensing he’s not quite privy to all the information. “No problem, I’ll give you mine.” 

He excuses himself for a moment, to grab a pen and paper. You look to see where he’s going and your eyes land on the one person you did not expect to see here. Yoongi. Yoongi watches you as he makes his way out onto the patio with Hoseok, dark eyes unreadable. Your heart leaps. Immediately you want to go over and say hello but you can’t. With one final glance he disappears through the sliding doors. Why do you feel like you’ve been caught doing something wrong?

“Here.”

Seokjin hands you a slip of paper with his home number and campus number. “Kim Seokjin.” You read aloud to yourself. “Thank you for this. I just saw my good friend here so I’m going to say hello. It was lovely meeting you!”

“You too.” He smiles warmly. 

“Come on Anni, Hobi’s here.” You inform her and her eyes widen in surprise. She likes Hobi. A lot. It’s the sweetest thing. 

“Bye Seokjin!” 

You drag Anni away before she can do any more damage.

Yoongi and Hoseok are sitting on the railing of the large wooden patio, joined by Jungkook who seemed to materialize out of nowhere. He’s talking energetically about something but Yoongi isn’t really focusing. He spots you walking over to him. Your face lights up as soon as your eyes meet. It makes him feel funny.

“I didn’t think you would be here.” You smile brightly as you come to a stop before him. 

“Hobi tricked me.” He shrugs, sipping his beer. The frown that his dry response elicits makes him feel guilty. “Are you two having fun?” He nods his head towards Anni.

“Y/n was.” She giggles, nudging you suggestively. “How about you two? I haven’t seen you in a while Hoseok.”

He flashes her a winning smile. “You’re seeing me now.” 

Yoongi fights an intense urge to roll his eyes. Hobi’s flirting always made him cringe. It’s even worse when it actually works. Hoseok offers everyone a drink but only Anni takes him up on the offer. Together they disappear in search of alcohol, leaving Yoongi alone with you. He feels awkward for some reason.

“You know she likes him, right? Hobi.” You say after a few beats of silence pass between you. Yoongi figured, from the way Anni hung on Hoseok’s every word.

“I’m sure he’d be down to hook up. He’s not picky.” He mutters. 

“Yoongi.” You scold. “They suit each other. They would be cute together.”

He hums in response. You’re right, of course but he’s not really in the headspace to be getting giddy about whether two people will fuck or not. 

You hoist yourself onto the railing next to him, scooting close enough that your bodies are touching. He tenses when you lay your head on his shoulder. “You’re not in a good mood tonight.” It’s not a question, you’re just consistently excellent at reading his emotions.

“You know I hate parties.” He mumbles. 

“Me too.”

“You looked like you were having fun earlier. Don’t feel obligated to sit with me.” He speaks before he thinks. It makes him sound bitter and jealous and angry. He hates it because not only does it make him sound pathetic; it’s true.

“I want to sit with you.” You correct quietly.

He doesn’t know how to respond, praise and affection always make him feel a little awkward. For a while you sit in comfortable silence, just watching the rest of what seems like the world have fun. Yoongi spies that tall pretty boy you were talking to glancing over and he feels a little smug at the disappointment on the strangers face seeing you and Yoongi looking cosy together. 

“Those two have been taking a suspiciously long time.” Yoongi muses, attention now back on his beer. 

“Yeah,” You huff a laugh. “I wonder why…”

“Do you wanna get out of here?” Yoongi asks abruptly. “Let’s go to the diner. I’m hungry.”

“That sounds like a plan.” You agree to his surprise. 

At your suggestion you seek out Hoseok and Anni to extend an invitation, only to find them kissing in a darkened corner of the hallway. Yoongi rolls his eyes while you snicker - “About time.”

When Yoongi smiles - really smiles - his entire demeanour changes. He has the tendency to look intimidating and cold when his expression is neutral (“I can’t help my face!” he would always defend when people mentioned it) but when he laughs his eyes light up like stars. You adore his gummy smile. 

The thought captures you in the diner as the two of you are doubled over with laughter. You were trying to throw a french fry into Yoongi’s mouth but missed completely, hitting an older woman in the booth behind, directly on the forehead. 

“No wonder you suck at basketball with an aim like that.” He grins, stuffing some fries in his mouth. 

“I’m so embarrassed.” You cover your reddening face with your hands but you’re still laughing. 

“It’s a good thing we’re Mike’s best customers or I’m sure we would have been kicked out by now.” Yoongi points out. He’s right. The greasy, twenty four hour diner has been your hang out for years now. 

“I’m going to miss it when I’m at college. I’ll have to make special trips back for the strawberry milkshakes.” You realise. 

“What about me?!” He scoffs playfully. “Nice to know on your list of priorities I’m below milkshake.”

“You know you’re my favourite.” You coo, stealing a fry from his hand before he has the chance to bite it. The look of indignation he gives you only makes you giggle. 

You walk home together, happy and still a little buzzed from the alcohol at the party. Somewhere along the way the back of Yoongi’s hand brushes against yours and he laces your fingers together. 

Summer persists in much the same way. Yoongi gets a job across the street from your work as a full time record store employee. He enjoys talking about music in his free time, so he figures he may as well get paid for it. You’re happy for him and he seems a little more content. You coordinate lunch breaks when you can, meeting to eat in the sunshine. 

Once a week Yoongi brings you a record or cassette he thinks that you’ll like. Sometimes he leaves little notes inside the sleeve of the vinyl, secret messages just for you. They range from random thoughts of his, inside jokes or just which song he loved the most. It’s such a Yoongi thing to do.

You make and bring him iced americano’s, on the house of course. At this point you’re pretty sure everyone he works with assumes you are a couple. What’s weird is that it doesn’t bother you in the slightest. 

If you thought the boundaries between you and Yoongi were blurred before, it’s even more confusing now. Yoongi treats you as if you’re his girlfriend, but only when you’re alone of course. When your other friends are around no one would suspect anything at all is going on between you. To say it’s messing with your head is an understatement. You wonder if Yoongi is going through the same mental turmoil about this as you are.

Probably not, if you’re being truly honest with yourself. A part of you knows he’s just latching on to you for comfort, for a way of coping. It’s not like his home life has magically improved in the last few weeks. Truthfully it seems to be steadily worsening. 

It’s pathetic how willing you are to pretend that it’s real. That you belong to Yoongi and he to you. Your mother once told you, amidst your heartbreak over Jimin while you had been blaming yourself for him cheating, that if someone wanted to do something, they would, regardless of you. She said it to comfort you but the words haunt you now. If Yoongi wanted you to be together, wouldn’t he ask?

You’re leaving for college soon. You won’t have Yoongi for much longer. So for now, you’ll allow yourself this indulgence, and just enjoy being with him.

“Please tell me you are not taking these.” Anni exclaims, holding up a pair of chunky black platform boots. “They’re the ugliest things I’ve ever seen.” She giggles at the look of outrage on your face. 

You’ve recruited Anni and Yoongi to help you pack some of your belongings since it’s only seven short days until you leave for Hangyang and could use the extra pair(s) of hands. The afternoon has consisted mainly of Anni questioning your taste whilst Yoongi rocks on your desk chair, attempting to solve a rubix cube he managed to find. 

“Yes I am taking those! They’re cute and they make me feel tall.” You snatch the shoes from her and place them in your suitcase. “Right Yoongi?” You ask, looking for backup.

“Yeah, sure, whatever.” He mumbles without even bothering to look up from the toy in his hands. 

“I’m going to miss you and your ugly shoes so much.” Anni sighs dramatically earning an eye roll from you. 

“I’m only one hour away from your school babe.” You remind her. Like you, she’s also leaving Daegu for Seoul. “It’ll be easy for us to meet up.”

“Have you met your roommates yet?” She inquires, inspecting yet another pair of your shoes. 

“Yeah, I’m with two girls. They seem nice enough. We have our own separate rooms which is nice.”

“That means you can have boys over.” She says suggestively. You hear Yoongi scoff slightly under his breath. 

“Yeah yeah,” You dismiss. “Speaking of boys, what’s going on with you and Hobi?” 

“He does not shut up about you.” Yoongi pipes up to Anni’s delight. “Seriously. It’s annoying.”

“I like him a lot. And we get on great.” She gushes, face lighting up. “But we’re going to be so far apart come September.” While you both are leaving for the city, Hoseok is going south for school.

“You can still date long distance.” You suggest.

“No you can’t.” Yoongi cuts in bluntly. “It won’t work.”

“What?” You look at him incredulously. “Of course they can.”

“No they can’t.” He rebuts, leaning forward resting his arms on his knees.. “It might work for a while. But she’ll be busy and will be meeting new people and he won’t be a priority anymore, because he doesn’t fit into her new life!”

“She cares about him! She’ll make time for him to fit into her life!”

“That’s bullshit. It won’t happen.” Yoongi jeers, a nasty undertone to his words that’s far too visceral to be directed at Anni.

“Alright, jeez. Calm down you two.” Anni looks between you, wide eyed. “I know you both care about me and Hobi but you don’t have to take it so personally.”

You and Yoongi lock eyes for a moment, a secret realization transpires between you, about exactly why you’re taking one another’s words so seriously. Before the tension in the room can worsen, your mom knocks on the bedroom door.

“Come in.” You call. She pokes her head through the door. “Hey mom.”

“How’s the packing going?” She inquires, peering around the room.

“Getting there.” You exhale, blowing some stray hairs away from your forehead.

“Good, good.” She nods. “I just got back from the supermarket, I bumped into Kim Jangmi and we had a very interesting chat.”

“Kim Jangmi?” You struggle to recall the name. It sounds familiar but you don’t exactly know the name of every single one of your mother’s friends. 

“Yes! You know, from my book club? Anyway she was with her son and we all got to chatting and apparently you met him a few weeks ago. Kim Seokjin!”

“Oh….yeah.” You mumble. “He goes to Hangyang and we ended up speaking for a bit.” 

“The handsome guy from the party?!” Anni interrupts keenly.

“Gosh, he is handsome isn’t he?” Your mother agrees, a little too enthusiastically for your liking. “He said you’re going to meet up at school?”

You glance at Yoongi before you answer, he  is clearly pretending not to be interested in the conversation, looking at the rubix cube as if it is the most interesting thing he’s ever seen. “Maybe. I don’t know. I barely know him.”

“He gave you his phone number.” Anni chirps. 

Yoongi’s eyes flick to you.  

“He was just being friendly.” You feel defensive for some reason. “We are on the same course, that’s all.”

“He’s a really nice boy, y/n. The reason why I came here was to tell you he’s going to help us when you move in next week.” Your mom beams.

“What?” You gasp, annoyed. “Why did you have to rope him into that?!” 

“He offered!” 

You sigh, feeling frustrated and defeated. “Okay mom. I'm sure that’s a lie, but ok.”

“Stop being difficult, darling.” She sighs. “I’m going to start on dinner now. Yoongi, Anni, you’re both welcome to stay.”

Yoongi and Anni both say thank you before your mother bids her goodbye. It’s odd in the room now; you feel exposed as if Yoongi just found out a secret you’ve been hiding. You want to tell him you’re not interested in Seokjin. You want to tell him you’re only interested in him. But you can’t. So the three of you continue packing.

Anni doesn’t sense the tension. “I hope your mom is making mac and cheese for dinner. Hers is the best.”

Seven days feels like a substantial amount of time but it’s not, Yoongi has come to understand. His last week with you flew by and he wishes he had even just one more day before you depart for Seoul. Seoul feels final. Seoul feels like the end.

Your life is going to change drastically, in almost every aspect, while his will remain the same. He knows it, feels it in his gut, that you’re going to leave him behind. You were always better than him, too good for him and now you’re going to realise it. And he’s been clinging on like a desperate man.

Somehow he manages to convince you to sneak out. It’s one am and you have to be up early for the big move but he’s grateful when you agree anyway. He’s waiting for you in his car. It’s silent apart from the low thrum of the idle engine and some indie rock playing over the radio at a low volume. 

You slip out of your front door, in a hoodie that Yoongi notes belongs to him. He can’t help how the sight makes his heart swell and excitement begin to race through him. He leans across the console and opens the passenger door for you. “Hi.” You whisper with a smile. 

“Hi.” He whispers back. 

He waits for you to buckle your seatbelt before pulling off. The roads are almost deserted at this time, a fact he finds oddly soothing. 

“Do I get to know where we are going or…?” You ask, peeking at him slyly out of the corner of your eye. 

“You’ll know in a minute.” Is his response. He’s taking you to a spot you’ve both been many times before. There’s an observatory at one of the highest points in town which gives an amazing view of the landscape below as well as the stars. It’s peaceful.

When he parks in the abandoned parking lot (the observatory has long since closed, lying abandoned now) there’s a fond smile playing on your lips. You like it here, having always been fond of the night sky. “Is there a reason you brought me here?”

Yes. 

“No,” He answers with a shrug. “Just wanted to have a nice last night with you.”

“You’re acting like I’m going to war or something.” You laugh. “I’ll be back and forth between here and Uni all the time.”

You say that now but he thinks (knows) the reality will be much different. 

He’s silent as he draws you in for a kiss. Hands cup your face and he pours as much intensity as he can into the gesture. His name falls breathlessly from your lips as he pulls away. “I need to tell you something.” He manages to choke out. He’s nervous and it constricts his vocal chords.

You blink a few times before your eyes widen with worry. “Is everything okay Yoongi?” 

“Yeah! Yeah..” He tries to convince you. “With you leaving and all I just wanted to let you know. Y/n… you mean a lot to me.” He takes a deep breath, an attempt to summon some courage, whilst you watch him curiously. “Our..friendship is different now. Things have changed.” No shit, he thinks. “I like you. So much. More than anyone else. I - I, you, you know?”

He wants to verbalise that he loves you so badly, but his brain is blocking the words from escaping. He feels like a fool. An emotionally stunted fool.

“Yoongi,” You say gently. Your eyes search his own and he knows you understand what he’s trying to say. You’ve always been excellent at reading him. “Me too.”

“I’ve never felt like this about anyone before.” He confesses in a low voice. “You’re everything to me.”

“I feel exactly the same.”

His heart constricts before thudding wildly in his chest. This was the answer he had hoped before. He hooks your pinky with his just like he always does. “Promise me if things change when you’re away we’ll be friends.” He can hardly look at you as he asks his desperate question.

“I promise.”  You squeeze his pinky tightly. “Nothing will change. You will always have me, Yoongi.”

Little more words and confessions are exchanged between you. Yoongi fucks you in the back seat of his car for what he hopes isn’t that last time. It’s different, passionate and slow. The windows steam up just like in the movies.

Still naked and sticky on top of you, he stretches forward and draws a heart in the condensation on the window. He writes both of your initials inside of it, then kisses you through your adorable giggles. 

The sun begins to rise and you watch it together before he drives you home.

The next time you will see Yoongi will be December. Three whole months from now. The thought anxiously chews away at your insides as you watch his house disappear in your rearview mirror. He has the phone number of your dorm and you promised to arrange regular phone catch ups. With your mother’s blessing you gave him a copy of the key to your house so he will always have a refuge, even if you’re not there to be one for him.

Areum and Oli are surprisingly easy to get along with. It’s never easy to live with people so you’re thankful you lucked out with some decent roommates. The first night away from home the three of you spend the evening drinking wine, eating take out and getting to know one another. 

Your room is cute, decorated with a few polaroids of you and friends and some fairy lights that twinkle at night. Among them is two pictures of you with Yoongi. The first from when you were ten and your mom managed to catch him and you napping on the sofa together and the second was from the last few months and he’s wearing that smile you love. It only makes you miss him more.

College officially doesn’t start for one week, the seven remaining days are filled with orientations and registrations and parties. Almost every bar and restaurant in the area have deals and themed nights on in order to entice the students out and it works.

The third night as an official Hangyang student you find yourself at dinner with Seokjin. After he had struggled to get your mattress into your room he had winked at you and said ‘you can make it up to me by buying me dinner’. Sufficiently guilty at receiving so much of his help you had agreed.

“I spent almost my entire first year here.” He jokes as he sits opposite you at a typical burger place he’d insisted you take him to. “You won’t find a better burger in a fifty km radius.”

“We’ll see. I have plenty of time to find out.”

Now that you’re out of the earshot of your parents you take the time to apologise for them roping him into helping you move. Seokjin waves it off with a genuine smile. If you didn’t know better you would think he wanted to help you. 

Surprisingly it’s easy to spend time with him and you soon discover you have a lot in common, beyond being on the same course and coming from the same town. He watches re-runs of 80s sitcoms too and loves bad horror movies. He even has the same obsession with milkshakes you do. 

“Let’s share one.” He suggests, ordering only one lone milkshake from the waitress. 

“This isn’t 1950. Or lady and the tramp.” You laugh, scrunching up your noise. 

“Hey! Lady and Tramp share spaghetti. Have some respect.” 

“Oh I’m sorry, I naturally should have assumed that you, a twenty two year old college male felt so strongly towards an old disney film.” You giggle.

He leans in close and beckons you to do the same, as if he’s going to whisper a secret. “I think it’s the cutest film ever.”

“Aw, you’re a secret softie.” You smile.

“The softest.” He agrees. 

Your milkshake arrives and it suddenly dawns on you why he wanted to order one to share. This thing was as large as a two liter bottle, and after a huge burger you doubt you could have finished one alone. 

It’s almost - dare you say it - cute, sharing the dessert with him. You’re glad you agreed to the dinner. It’s been years since you spent time with another boy that wasn’t Yoongi and it’s nice. Between some of the classmates you’ve met, your roommates and Seokjin college feels hopeful. You’re excited. 

You go to pay the check but Seokjin stops you with a laugh, assuring you he was only joking before. “Let me treat you, as a thanks for your time.” He says before walking away with a grin. 

Three weeks away from home and your routine is beginning to shape and settle itself. Classes aren’t as hard as you expect them to be but you have a sneaking suspicion it won’t stay that way for long. Seokjin offers to help if you need it and you’re grateful that he’s slowly becoming a friend. 

Thursday nights have become a regular thing in your new home. Areum, Oli and yourself make it a thing to have dinner together and gossip about the week. Oli is majoring in sports medicine so is almost always busy while Areum is studying law, which all but shackles her to the library. 

There’s a knock on the door and you hop to your feet, hungry and eager to receive the chinese food you’d ordered for the three of you. To your surprise is Seokjin on the other side and not the delivery guy you’ve become so familiar with as of late. 

“Seokjin. Hey! What brings you here?” You ask, trying not to sound too put out. As far as you were aware you had no prior plans arranged.

“I just finished my shift at the library and thought I’d come see my favourite freshman.If that’s okay?” He eyes you curiously.

“My roommates and I were just about to have dinner. Unless you want to join?” One more can’t hurt and usually you order far too much food anyway. He agrees eagerly with a smile 

Areum and Oli have met Seokjin once before and they greet him warmly when he joins the three of you in the small sitting area. Areum helps you grab some plates and napkins in preparation for the food arriving. Once in the kitchen she peeks over her shoulder to make sure she’s not heard, whispering lowly - “Are you two dating now?” 

“W-what?” You stutter, so completely taken aback you almost drop the porcelain you’re holding. “No!” 

“Don’t look so offended.” Areum laughs at your reaction. “He’s gorgeous. And so into you.” “No he’s not. Don’t be ridiculous.” You’re quick to defend. Seokjin is your friend and nothing more. You have Yoongi. Sort of. 

“So you wouldn’t mind if he and Oli…?” She nods her head towards the two of them, talking and smiling.

“Of course not.” You answer sharply. Areum looks at you as if she doesn’t believe you but doesn’t press the topic further as you rejoin your friends.

“Oh y/n, before I forget someone called for you this afternoon. I totally forgot to say before I had my nap.” Oli says as you sit down. “That Yoongi guy.” 

Both of the girls are familiar with Yoongi, given the amount you speak with him.  You called each other every other night, it was unusual for him to call during the day. “Oh. Thank you for letting me know. Do you guys mind if I call him back real quick before dinner?”

Your friends assure you it’s fine and you disappear to the kitchen where the house phone resides. Quickly you dial Yoongi’s number, having long since memorised it. You eye the clock, hoping it’s him that answers and not one of his parents. Thankfully your silent prayer is answered when his gruff voice greets.

“Yoongi, it’s me.” You begin quietly. “I’m so sorry I missed your call today, I only just found out - “

“ - It’s okay.” He interupts gently. “You’re calling now.”

“How are things?”

He lets out a worrying sigh. Something in your gut alerts you that things are not good for him right now. “Mom’s in the hospital. Courtesy of Mr Asshole himself.” He spits the last part out with venom.

“Oh my god. Is she okay?” 

“Yeah. No. Well, she’s alive. He broke her jaw, knocked out a few teeth.” He says it so casually, it only further exemplifies how used to this behaviour he has become. It’s a miracle he is nothing like his father. “She lied about it to the doctors but y/n, they know. I can see it in their eyes and they either look at us like we’re stupid or that they pity us.”

“I’m sure they don’t think that. They probably see instances like this all the time. It’s heartbreaking as an outsider.” You assure. “This could be a huge turning point. To actually get your mom away from your dad.”

“Yeah.” He exhales. It’s clear he doesn’t believe your nor agree. “Fuck, I wish you were here right now y/n.”

“Me too.” You reply softly, heart aching in your chest. You wish you were too. “It’s almost the weekend, maybe I can book a train home?” You have your first assignment due in a week and definitely don’t have the time to waste at home but for Yoongi you would do anything. 

“You don’t have to do that.” He sounds choked up. You wonder if he’s crying. “I’ll be busy looking after my mom anyway. I just needed to hear your voice. I miss you.”

“I miss you. Remember you have my key? Use it as much as you need it. You can always come up here for a day or a weekend.” You suggest.

The knock at the door signalling that the food has arrived is loud enough that Yoongi hears it through the phone. Areum’s voice yells to you as she answers it. “Sounds like you have to go. I’m sorry if I’ve ruined your evening.” Yoongi tells you sadly.

“Can I call you later?” You ask hopefully.

“Please.” Yoongi sighs. 

“Bye Yoongi. Speak soon.”

“Bye.”

You hang up, plastering on a fake look of happiness as you rejoin your friends. They seem convinced, apart from Seokjin. “Boyfriend troubles?” He asks, in a not so subtle attempt of inquiring information of your relationship status. Areum and Oli exchange a knowing glance. 

“No,” You reply with a shake of your head. “I don’t have a boyfriend. Just checking in with a friend back home.” 

“I see.” Seokjin side eyes you, a secret smile tugging at his lips. 

Strangely, Yoongi sleeps better knowing his mother is in the safety of the hospital. He spends the night alone, dad having long since fucked off somewhere. Yoongi doesn’t know where and more importantly, he doesn’t care. There’s peace in his home for the first time in forever.

His mind wanders to you. He hopes he hasn’t ruined your evening too much. From what you’ve shared through the phone college life is kicking off to a wonderful start. He wishes he could experience it too.

As you had anticipated, month two of college has your workload almost doubling. Thursday night dinners don’t happen weekly anymore, given how much time you spend studying just to keep up with the rest of your classmates. When you were in high school your natural ability allowed you to not just get by but succeed. 

To be struggling, this early on in college, feels embarrassing. 

You talk less frequently with Yoongi and your family. In fact you barely even see the people you live with. Seokjin, however you see often, given that he works in the library. The single downside to this means he’s the only one who knows your secret. That college is hard and you’re drowning a little.

Once again, it’s a friday night and you’re buried in a mountain of books, furiously taking notes. Your hand aches, you have eye strain and your stomach has been gurgling for the last hour and a half. The sound of the chair opposite you screeching along the marble floor forces you to lift your head. 

“You’re here more than I am.” It’s Seokjin, smiling at you as he plops down onto the chair. 

You sigh. “Yeah, we’ve got a huge essay due soon and I need to do well.”

“I can help you if you want. I’ve passed that course, remember?” He taps the side of his temple. “I’m as smart as I am handsome y/n.”

You can’t help but laugh as you roll your eyes. “I could use some help.” You begin timidly. “If you don’t mind! And you’re not busy. I know it’s Friday…”

“I’m happy to make time for you.” He smiles and you feel like a fool when it makes you blush. 

Seokjin spends a further hour in the library with you and your coursework. He helps you tweak the essay where it needs it, knowing exactly what the professors are looking for. By the time you’re almost done it feels as if a weight has been lifted from your shoulders. Your stomach embarrassingly gurgles again and that’s when he decides you’ve had enough for one night.

“Come on, we’re getting food.” He is so commanding you can’t help but go along with it. 

Both of your roommates are out for the night so heading to your place seems like the best idea, opting to pick up some food on the way. You’re so dead on your feet having Seokjin practically push and pull you around and then home is welcomed.

The shrill pitch of a telephone ringing welcomes you as you cross the threshold into your apartment. You dash for the phone leaving Seokjin to deal with the paper bag of take out food. “Hello?”

“Hey.” It’s Yoongi. “I’ve been calling you for ages, y/n. Where’ve you been?”

“I’ve been studying. I guess I lost track of time.”

“You said you’d call me at seven.” Yoongi sounds grumpy and defensive. You wonder what’s happened at home now.

“I’m sorry. School is kicking my ass Yoongi.”

“Then don’t tell me you’ll call me at seven if you’re busy.” He almost spits at you. Someone’s clearly in a bad mood tonight.

“I said I was sorry.” 

You watch Seokjin behind you as he dishes the food on plates for you both, politely pretending to not listen to your conversation. He has no choice, the phone is stuck to the wall, leaving you trapped there. 

Yoongi heaves a long sigh on the phone. “I’m just struggling a little too.” He admits, leaving you feeling instantly guilty. 

“How's your mom?”

“Not good, but not any worse.” 

“I know it’s hard without me and Hobi there, but christmas is soon and I’ll be home for nearly four weeks.” You remind him. 

“I can’t wait.”

Before you can reply Seokjin’s voice is tearing you away from the conversation. “Do you want to eat in your room or the couch?”

“Couch.” You reply, hand over the receiver in an attempt to mute your voice. 

“Who is that?” Yoongi's voice is terse.

“Just a friend staying for dinner.”

“It’s a guy.” Yoongi states.

“A friend.”

“You said you were studying.”

“I was.”

“It doesn’t sound like it. You’re ditching me for a college boy already and it’s only been a few weeks. Glad I’m so memorable to you.”

He hangs up and you stand there in shock, the sound of the dial tone echoing in your ear.

Yoongi slams the phone down, an action that is usually satisfying but does nothing for him in the moment. He squeezes his eyes shut and takes a few deep breaths, willing the anger he feels surging to subside. How could you move on so easily? He definitely had not imagined your feelings for him. So either he was stupid, or you had lied.

You’re hanging out with a guy who is comfortable enough to suggest being alone together in your bedroom and you have the audacity to claim he’s ‘just a friend’. He’s someone you clearly are overly familiar with. Yoongi scoffs out loud in sheer disbelief. 

He has to pull himself together. He can’t allow himself to get angry, not when his mom needs him. She still has a few more weeks of recovery and he’s been taking care of her best he can. An unfortunate and tragic upside to his mom’s injuries is that his dad has left her alone, leading to a relatively peaceful home life. Yoongi can’t be the one to destroy it now by letting his emotions get the better of him.

A few more deep breaths and he’s in a decent enough headspace to go check on his mom. Her painkillers are due soon, anyway. Yoongi retrieves a granola bar and some fruit so she isn’t taking them on an empty stomach. 

“Mom?” He knocks on the door to the spare bedroom, where she has been resting. The room was formerly Yoonseoks. In a bid to cling onto some hope of him returning, his mother has kept it intact. Yoongi knows his brother isn’t coming back. 

She makes a noise signalling he’s welcoming to come in. Because of her injuries she’s unable to talk well at the moment. 

“I brought you some painkillers.” He says gently, placing the items on the nightstand. She hums appreciatively. “I spoke to Dad.” He sighs, sitting on the edge of the bed. His mom nods, muting the TV she had been watching. “He’s staying with Uncle Jihoon tonight.”

His mom weakley reaches to squeeze his hand affectionately. He knows that means thank you. 

“The hospital called and confirmed your sick pay will extend.”He sighs, rubbing at his tired eyes roughly. “I said you were getting better and would be back as soon as you could.”

He stares at her for a few moments, wishing he had a normal life like you do. “I love you mom, I’m going to leave the door open if you need me.”

“I love you too.” She replies. It makes his chest squeeze knowing that she spoke, even though it pains her. Just to tell her son she loves him.

He nods curtly and leaves the room, ensuring the door is ajar. When he’s back in his own room he collapses on the bed exhausted. The last few weeks have been draining and his sleep is suffering. It’s restless, fraught with bad dreams. He sleeps much lighter, listening out for his mother. 

He wishes he didn’t resent you and Hobi so much for leaving him. He wishes his dad didn’t have anger issues and no self control. He wishes his mom was stronger and told his dad to get out a long time ago. More than anything, he wishes he had a normal life.

As ever you’re the nicer friend and you phone Yoongi to make up the next day. He feels like an asshole, knowing how much you hate conflict, but he misses your voice so much lately  that it’s enough to override his own dickery behaviour. As usual it  doesn’t take you long to have him smiling again. 

Before you part ways you tell him it’s only thirty three days until you’re home.  He promises to be there waiting for you at the train station the day you arrive. Something warm blooms in his chest and he realises it’s the first time he’s felt hopeful in weeks.

Seokjin insists on taking you out on the last night before winter break. Your complaints about the cold fall on deaf ears as he all but drags you from your apartment. He wraps his oversized red scarf around your neck throwing out a see? Now you have nothing to complain about. And he was right it felt nice., The cotton is warm against your skin and smells like Seokjin’s cologne. 

There’s a large christmas market close to campus in which he buys you some hot chocolate. It reminds you of the smaller one back home that you and Yoongi would frequent ever since you were old enough to understand the concept of the holidays. 

“Let’s go for a walk.” Seokjin suggests. “The Yanghwa bridge is pretty at night.”

There’s a comfortable silence between you as you stroll side by side. He spots you shivering and slips an arm across your shoulders, tugging you close to his side. His body heat is welcoming. You peer up at him to try and read his expression but he’s staring straight ahead, a wry smile playing on his lips. 

“I love Seoul.” You sigh happily. “I might actually miss it back at Daegu.”

“I wish I was going back to Daegu. My parents always go to Japan this time of year.” 

“You gonna send me a postcard from Japan?” You ask jokingly, nudging him slightly with your shoulder.

“Obviously. How are you going to go weeks without talking to me?” He grins. 

You shake your head with a laugh. He’s been such a welcome intrusion to your life lately a tiny, miniscule, barely there, part wonders the same.

Seokjin stops walking when you reach the middle of the bridge. The view combined with the lights is spectacular. You almost miss how he angles his body towards you until his hands are slipping around your waist and pulling you against his lean figure.

“Y/n, I really like you.” He says thickly.

You are almost unable to respond. You’re not stupid, he’s been dropping hints for months now but to actually hear the words leave his mouth is alarming. Your mind is racing a mile a minute, heartbeat increasing as you think of Yoongi. You shouldn’t be in this precarious situation, you’re not together but he’s yours - 

Seokjin completely disrupts your internal monologue by pressing his soft, plush lips against your own. He’s gentle, fearful as if you might completely reject him. When you don’t (to your own surprise) he presses his mouth against you a little harder. 

You don’t want to admit to yourself how good it feels. 

Seokjin’s large hands tug you somehow impossibly tighter against his body as he slips his tongue against your bottom lip, parting your mouth as he goes. It’s so different to Yoongi. It’s sweet. It’s new, uncharted terrority. Just as you begin to get into it and further deepen the kiss, his touch becomes infuriatingly tame.

He smirks at you when he finally pulls away. You can only imagine how dazed you look. 

“I- uh, what was that for?”

“You look cute in my scarf.” Is all he says, as if he didn’t have his tongue down your throat a moment ago. He laughs when your face twists with disbelief. 

“Seokjin, I’m not - I can’t. I shouldn’t be doing this..” You cringe at how embarrassing that sounds and how incoherent it is.

The confident exterior he brought with him tonight cracks just a little. “Why? You said you didn’t have a boyfriend.” He frowns.

“I don’t. But there’s someone. It’s really complicated. I’m sorry.”

“Ah,” He nods as he accepts the meaning of your words. “I see,” He sighs. “I’m not totally out of the running I hope?”

“I - “

“Look. Think about it over break. I like you. We have fun together! It would be nice to see where it could go.”

“Seokjin - “ You try once more. He shushes you with a smile. 

Despite the kiss the rest of the evening is nice. Thank god you don’t have to see him for a while though. 

The nearly four hour train ride back to Daegu leaves you with plenty of time to think. Too much time, as it turns out. As much as you attempt to bury yourself in the book and magazine you’ve brought to serve as distractions. 

Seokjin kissed you last night. Seokjin kissed you. Seokjin kissed you and you liked it.

You’re on your way to see a boy who you have admitted openly how you feel for him, a boy who has waited months for you and you spent your last moments away kissing someone else. Even though you and Yoongi aren’t official you still feel awful. And if you’re brutally honest with yourself it’s because you can envision dating Seokjin. One could argue you sort of are already. He’s definitely been courting you.

When you step onto the platform and observe Yoongi for the first time, your breath traps in your throat. He looks like a brooding artist standing there in his leather jacket and chuck taylors. Your walk turns into a half run in a bid to get to him as quickly as possible. 

He huffs an ‘oomf’ when you crash your body into his but hugs you so tightly that he sweeps you off your feet. 

Yoongi carries your suitcase to the car for you. Neither of you can wipe the lovesick smiles from your faces. He holds your hand across the console as he drives, occasionally rubbing his thumb on your palm. It’s so sickeningly domestic and you love it.

When you’re finally alone in your room his lips are on your neck before either of you have removed your outer clothing. He’s all kisses and whispered praise as he undresses you. You’re naked on your back for him as he licks your pussy and all you can manage to breathlessly gasp is “I fucking missed you.”

You come with his tongue buried inside you and his fingers tweaking your nipples. “I fucking missed you, my pretty girl.” He whispers, biting the shell of your ear. 

The weight of his heavy cock in your hand is familiar. A visible shudder runs through him at your touch. When you get on your knees for him an exhilarated sigh leaves his lips. “Gonna suck my dick huh?” He’s almost mumbling to himself. You answer him by taking his cock in your mouth. He groans like he’s never had his dick wet before. “Fuck,” spills from his mouth like a mantra. 

Before he has the chance to get carried away he’s fisting your hair and flipping you onto your front. Yoongi fucks you harshly from behind. The hand in your hair grasps at your scalp to leave your head permanently tilted back for him. He shoots his seed as deep inside of you as the angle allows. 

His heavy breath on your neck and sweat on your skin feels fucking fantastic. You could die right now, happy, satiated and stupidly in love with Min Yoongi.

Christmas Day had always been just another day in the Min household. He only became aware of how abnormal his family’s style was when he was barely a preteen and other kids at school would discuss the fantastical ways they spent their holidays. Even kids who didn’t celebrate the holiday seemed to enjoy it more. He didn’t particularly feel much about Christmas.

Until he met you. And your family welcomed him with open arms. A gesture which included inviting him over every single year. The invitation extended to his family but usually he attended solo (except for that one time Yoonseok joined and spitefully pushed your plate onto your lap). 

This year is no different. 

Your mom feeds him well. She’s kind to him, taking a keen interest in his life. Your father always asks about the one interest they have in common - basketball. It’s not much but Yoongi’s dad has never broached the subject. 

After dinner you suggest going for a walk, an idea with which Yoongi happily obliges. Unable to stop himself he’s lacing your hands together the moment you’re out of eyesight from your parents’ house. He kisses the back of your knuckles as he throws you a devilish grin. 

Naturally you gravitate towards the enormous Christmas tree and ice rink in the town center. It’s been a long standing tradition, however it feels far more romantic this time. It’s just the two of you and you’re holding hands, just like the other couples that frequent the area. The sparkling lights on the fir light up your eyes like stars.

Snow begins to fall as you come to a stop at the wooden railing that separates the tree from the public. Yoongi lifts the hood on your parka jacket up for you, kissing you on the cheek as he goes. It’s not even comparable for the amount you do for him but anything he can give you he will.

Adorably you nuzzle into him, resting your head on his chest. His arms automatically wrap around you and he lets out a breath of content. You probably won’t be able to stay out much longer given the rapidly declining temperature so he’ll enjoy this while he can. 

“Yoongi!” 

A voice startles him, calling out from somewhere in the distance. Yoongi’s head whips round to see Hoseok and Anni of all people. Without thought he quickly, albeit harshly, pushes you away from him, lest you get caught in such a compromising position. No one knows about you two and he’d like to keep it that way. He already knows you’re too good for him; he does not need others reinforcing it at every opportunity. 

Yoongi doesn’t think he’s made a mistake until he glimpses one look at your hurt, confused expression. 

“Hey guys.” Hobi greets you both warmly. Yoongi notices he’s holding hands with Anni. 

“Hey.” You reply. “Merry Christmas! It’s nice to see you both.”

“You too!” Anni replies warmly. “Did you have Christmas at the l/n house?”

“Yeah.” Yoongi mutters. “Just walking off the carbs.” 

“Hobi met my parents for the first time.” Anni’s expression is one of pure happiness and he can’t help but feel a little jealous. “We had dinner together too.”

“Aw, that’s lovely.” You say. Yoongi can tell you’re upset, your tone sounds forced. “I bet they adored you Hobi.”

“”Of course.” Hoseok flashes that winning smile. “When are you both free? We should go for dinner or something.”

“How about - “ Yoongi starts.

“I’m not sure, I’ve got lots of schoolwork.” You cut him off and he shuts up instantly. “I’ll phone you Anni and we can sort something out?”

“Sure.” Anni says slowly. “We’ll leave you guys. I want to go inside anyway because I'm cold. Hopefully see you soon!”

Anni gives you a warm hug while Yoongi hugs Hoseok. They both wave cheerfully as they leave. He watches their happy retreating forms until they disappear round a corner. When he faces you once more your body language has completely shifted. Arms folded across your chest, gaze turned downwards. 

He feels uncomfortable, he knows he hurt you but he’s not entirely sure how. Now it’s awkward. “Should we uh, walk some more?”

“Are you sure you want to be seen with me? You pushed me away from you so fast back there I almost fell over.” You mumble. 

“I didn’t mean to. Hobi and Anni don’t know about...anything.”

“So?” You finally look up to meet his eyeline. To his utter dismay your big eyes are glossy with unspilled tears. “Would it be so bad if they did?”

“Uh..I, um. I don’t know.” He trips over his wording like an idiot. The only reason he’s never breathed a word about your illicit activities to anyone is because he naturally assumed you didn’t want anyone to know. Yoongi wasn’t exactly the epitome of a model boyfriend.

“Why have you never asked me on a date? Why have you never asked me to be your girlfriend?” You demand and he panics. He doesn’t have an answer stronger than I don’t know and he’s confused as to why you’re so angry. He naively assumed what existed between you was enough. 

“Do you seriously think someone like me would make a good boyfriend?” He all but groans. You of all people should understand that fact. He’s never had a girlfriend. “I don’t do relationships.”

“Then why treat me like I’m yours? Why hold my hand? Why tell me you love me?!”

He doesn’t know what to say. He makes the fatal mistake of shrugging. 

You laugh mockingly. “Do you even love me? It feels like you’re just ashamed of me. Couldn’t even stand to touch me in front of your best friend. Just like that I let you have sex with me, I guess.”

“Y/n…” He starts. How is he even supposed to respond? This is all his fault. He’s only ashamed of himself, never you. “I can’t be what you need.”

An uncomfortable tightness constricts in his chest at the verbal admission. The sentiment has been lurking in the back of his mind since the moment he first started noticing you as more than just his friend. You deserve someone happy, stable, with a good background. Not the chaotic baggage he brings.

“You’re not allowed to have your cake and eat it too, Yoongi. That’s not fair.” You sniff as a lone tear escapes. “You can’t treat me this way, get jealous about dudes and then refuse to claim me.”

He had never even thought about it like that, unable to realise that’s what he had been doing to you.

“A guy at college kissed me, you know.” You blurt, heatedly.  His guilt quickly turns to shock and now Yoongi wants to throw up because you lied to him. You were off at college kissing people and then hopping back to him, the fool that waits for you no matter what.

“Is that so?” He mutters, hot anger bubbling in his chest. You nod staring at him fiercely. “I’ve met someone too.” It’s a lie. “I just respected you enough not to do anything.”

The entire atmosphere changes. You’re gawking at him as if he’s slapped you in the face.

“You've met someone?” 

He hums in agreement, terrified to commit even further to the lie. 

“Who?”

“No one that you know. But you’ve obviously met someone too, so it’s whatever.”

Mascara tears spill down your cheeks and it physically pains to witness. He turns his head to the side, unable to watch any further. He did this to you. 

“If it’s ‘whatever’ to you then maybe we shouldn’t do this - ” A sob chokes you mid sentence. “ - anymore.”

How is his Christmas day ending so spectacularly poorly? How is this his current reality? Yoongi’s brain and mouth stall, torn between the desire to rescue this horrific situation and hate you for kissing someone else. It simultaneously feels like a lifetime and a split second before you’re speaking, deciding for him.

“Nothing to say? Really?! Maybe I don’t know you so well after all,” the evident heartbreak in your voice makes his eyes burn. Now he really can’t bear to look directly at you. 

“You kissed someone.” He mumbles, weak and pathetic. “Maybe I don’t know you.”

“I’m leaving, don’t follow me.” 

He glances just in time to watch you walk away. “Fuck,” He groans a little too loudly, attracting the attention of a family nearby. Angrily he kicks a stone and clutches at his hair. He might be the biggest idiot alive. This is exactly why he could never be your boyfriend, he can’t handle anything.

Cold and numb, and not just from the weather, he reaches inside the breast pocket of his jacket and pulls out a cigarette. It’s a fairly new habit, so new you don’t even know about it yet, but fuck, does he need to take the edge off. 

You manage to escape your parents and disappear to the safety of your bedroom as soon as you arrive home. Aggressively you draw your curtains shut, a not so subtle message to Yooni. The implication is clear; you do not want to talk. You doubt he’ll be making an appearance tonight anyway. This was no regular arguement.

You recall that night you left for school, the night he told you he loved you. Technically he never said the words. You. knowing him for most of his life, had assumed he felt what you had. Perhaps you assumed incorrectly. Horrifically inaccurately. And now your heart is wilting in your ribcage. 

Stupid, lovesick, little girl.

The train ride back to Seoul is bordering on unbearably lonely, despite the carriage full of passengers. The days after Christmas that bled into New Years seem like a depressing blur that you don’t wish to recall but somehow can’t stop thinking about.

You haven’t heard from Yoongi since that horrible night. You wonder if someone else is occupying his time and that’s why he doesn’t wish to make amends. It’s always you extending the proverbial olive branch. You want him to want to do the same. Right now it looks like he doesn’t.

a/n: if this gave you a rollercoaster of emotions and made you feel sad, dw you’re not the only one, lol. each part is going to be about 20k so buckle up babies! (this story is still going thru editing so if u see mistakes IM SORRY) thank you as always for reading :)))))) P.S feedback makes me happy, lmk what u think! what u think might happen! if you want to slap me for writing so much angst lol! <3

masterlist

i don’t condone any copying or translations of my work. written 2020©

[babygirlkiki1016]

Masterlist

Chapter 10: A lovely bond

Chapter 11: Unexpected Betrayal

I resealed the door, drawing the same pattern as before to lock it in place. I was going to miss this little cave, for more memories than I ever could imagine happened here. I ran my fingers over my newly designed dwarven braid, after Thorin saw the one I made he decided to redo my braid into a dwarven rose. It was incredibly beautiful, I don't think I'd ever want to take it out.

"Well, you owe me a tooth." Kili wrapped his arm around my shoulder as we headed to the shifter's home. For he had more supplies that we needed, especially some from my home that we have supplied him with. "I found your courter, I will say I am surprised that it was my uncle. I never believed he could feel that way towards you, but now I understand why he didn't want you to think about marriage."

"Oh really? And why is that?"

"He didn't want you to marry anyone else but him, I guess that means we get to call you auntie now. Auntie Y/n, rolls off the tongue doesn't it?"

"Although I'm glad that my uncle has warmed up to you, why would you want to be with someone who hurt you more than once?" Fili came close to my right, giving me a curious look. I didn't know why I loved Thorin, all he has ever done was make me feel sad. Did I fall in love because I wanted a person that didn't want me?

"I don't know the answer to that Fili, I have no idea why I fell in love with him. Thought I'm glad I did, for he has made me feel something I haven't felt in years." My gaze trailed over to the King who is staring back at me with a soft smile, my heart fluttered. As we made our way to the shifter's home, I rejoined my beloved who led the company.

"Thorin." I greeted, making him glance over at me with the same grin from earlier.

"Good morning amralime, I was beginning to worry you were ignoring me. For you haven't said a thing to me all morning."

"I was busy helping the others pack their things, for some reason they kept bowing as I approached." They had never done that before, and to me it was weird they would treat me such way. It became highly annoying, I had to keep reminding them that they didn't have to do that.

"You are my betrothed, soon you will be the Queen under the mountain. They have recognized you as one of their own, and accepted you as their Queen."

"I've done nothing to prove I'm a good leader, how could they call me such?"

"They first started to admire you when you asked for me to set your people free if you fell. Then you protected us in the Goblin tunnels, and when we were fighting the trolls. Even when you left, you still came back, you showed loyalty. And that's all they can ever ask for, it's all I can ask for." He slipped his arm around my waist pulling me closer to him, that look of adoration now had a permanent place on his features. Yet the small romantic moment came to an end, darkness appeared behind us, an orc pack was not far behind.

"Thorin." The look on my face was obvious, he shouted to the others to get their weapons ready. "This way!" I led them far into the forest, and soon we made our way onto Beorn's land. We ran across the field, the Orcs hot on our heels stop when they hear the creature roaring close by. We rushed to his house with the insanely large bear traveling behind us, quickly I unlocked the door letting everyone in. The creature lunges its head through it, and we all push to close the door. After being slightly injured by the pressure of the gate, Beorn finally moves his head and we manage to shut and lock the entrance.

"What is that?" Ori asked turning to me and the great grey wizard that stood beside me.

"That is our host," Gandalf explained as my focus went to Thorin, who was leaning on the door tiredly. He held his side, I reached forward and pulled away his cloak to see that he was bleeding slightly. "His name is Beorn, he’s a skin-changer. Sometimes he’s a huge black bear, sometimes he’s a great strong man. The bear is unpredictable, but the man can be reasoned with. However, he is not overly fond of dwarves."

"Come, let me fix your bandage." I let Thorin lean on me slightly, slowly I set him down on a nearby stool as the rest of the dwarves questioned if Beorn's abilities were dark magic or not. As Thorin slipped off his top clothing I grabbed a herb from my homeland that we had given to Beorn which he rarely ever uses. It's more of a 'just in case' necessity, good thing he has it.

"What is that?" Thorin took the red egg-like plant from my hand, examining it.

"It's called Arigonis, the juice inside has healing properties, it's a very rare plant. Well was, but we found a way to grow it, it'll heal your injuries all the way. However it will take time, a hour or so tops so don't scratch at it no matter how much it itches." I brought over a small bowl with water within, kneeling in front of him I took the plant and broke it apart. Using the juice and skin, I made this paste-like substance to put on his injuries. He had already taken his bandages off and discarded them to the side. When I looked up to cover him in the red-like paint, our faces were close, it was hard not to kiss him though I hardly doubt he would mind. I got to work in covering him with the herb, and it didn't take long before he went to scratch at it. "Hey, no don't do that." I slap his hand away playfully, he groans in frustration.

"It itches."

"That's how you know it's working, but if you scratch at it your wound won't heal all the way." He wants to scratch it badly, his fingers dug into his thigh so he wouldn't be tempted. Once I was done covering him in the agitating red paste, I washed my hands before making my way back over to him. I removed his hands from his thighs and made him focus on me. I was nervous, for I had never sang in front of anyone before but I figured it would help. I took a deep breath, keeping my gaze to the floor. "Wind howls in my hair, the world stops when you come this near. Starlight on your skin, the sky sways as you pull me in. And I, I wanna swim in your ocean. I wanna know how to love again, Ooh take me into your arm, sirens call, how fast I fall. Beneath your waves, no storm can take my eyes from you." Everyone turned to me, listening as I sang the song my mother used to hum to me when I was a child. "Crash down to my knees, their fears and hopes flood over me.

Your hand finds my own and shows me that I'm not alone. Now I, I'm diving deep in your ocean, I see the way to redemption, Ooh.

Take me into your arms, sirens call, how fast I fall. Beneath your waves, no storm can take

my eyes from you." All gathered around to listen as I sang the vocals, while others closed their eyes to sleep to the sound.

"Y/n." Thorin rested his hand upon my cheek, making me lean into his touch with a need to feel it. His eyes shined with a lovable glare, for he was stunned at my sudden talent.

"Take me into your arms, sirens call, how fast I fall. Beneath your waves, no storm can take

my eyes from you." (Song called Into Your Arms by Ryan Louder & Serena). Thorin's lips found it's way to mine, the rough skin made me crave more but we can only do so much in front of the others.

"You should sing more often." He gave me a pleading look, I rolled my eyes and retrieved another bandage to wrap around his torso.

"Perhaps I will, but for now you need to rest."

"Sing me to sleep, my Queen?" I kissed his forehead, smiling at his request. His hands landed on my waist pulling me in, but he kept me away just far enough where I wouldn't mess up the paste.

"Anything for you my King."

~♪♠♪~

My arms rested around the dwarven man, his hair tickling my nose slightly. Ever since we had proclaimed our love to each other he's been wanting me to sleep by his side. Which of course I was willing to do, but it made me think. How long would I have a moment like this? Surely the other dwarven kingdoms would want him to marry someone suitable, though maybe I am suitable. Once we get those reports and it's shown to the world that my kin is innocent they wouldn't be able to turn down an alliance with the Queen of the Digonisks.

"You seem deep in thought." Thorin's voice rumbled, a shiver ran down my spine at the sudden vibration.

"Have you been watching me this entire time?" He shifted onto his side, those beautiful blue orbs meeting mine.

"No, but I can tell when your asleep and when your not. And when you think deeply about certain things you tend to frown or smile. Today you did both." His thumb caressed my cheek, a gesture to make sure I was alright. "What is it amralime?"

"After this quest, and my kin goes free, won't your people want you to marry someone suitable?"

"You are suitable, there is evidence that digonisks are innocent. Once the humans and the rest of my people realize their mistake, they'll do anything to make their wrongs a right."

"...What if the scrolls aren't there? What if we never find them, will you still love me?"

"Of course." He seemed hurt that I began to doubt his feelings, a determined look appeared. He leaned forward and pecked my lips, but it soon became a more passionate kiss. Luckily we were in one of the empty stables for privacy, or the others would be grossed out. His arms wrapped tightly around me, I settled on top of him and straddle his waist. His bandages remained on his chest, for I had forgotten to take them off last night yet his wounds should be healed all the way now. With a smirk he flipped us over, his muscular figure now above my own.

"We're gonna get caught."

"Let them see." He goes to kiss me again but a loud fake gag was heard from behind him.

"No don't them see." Kili covered his eyes along with his brother, I gave Thorin an 'I told you so' look. "We came to tell you breakfast has been made." They quickly scurried away, sighing Thorin stood and we headed to the dining room. Everyone is sat at a table being served breakfast by Beorn, whose eyes widened when he saw me.

"Y/n." He nods his head slightly as a greeting, but a frown comes upon his features. "What are you doing here with a bunch of dwarves? Shouldn't you be in-" He stopped talking, for he did not want to give away our hidden home.

"No, I've been helping these men for the past few months. Don't worry Beorn they know, and they've accepted me." I stood in front of Thorin, undoing the white cloth that had been around his torso for far too long.

"If your here then who's running things?"

"Lani, my handmaiden why is there something wrong?"

"I've received word from your people that I must pay tribute for the Arigonis. They want me to cut wood so they can collect it." I stopped, pay tribute? I've never had him pay tribute before and Lani knows that, besides it's not that rare of a plant anymore.

"And if you refuse?"

"They wouldn't supply me with it anymore, and if I continue to refuse they threatened to imprison me. At first, I was angry for I never expected this out of you but seeing you now showed me that you had nothing to do with it." Imprisonment? That was nothing like my kin, what was going on while I was away?

"Who gave the order?"

"Fenris delivered me the scroll explaining how things were going to be handled from now on. Though I don't think it was him." There was no way Lani would take control like this, she was an innocent girl, right? Or was she abusing the power I gave her? Maybe it was a misunderstanding, that's not like her, she can barely ask me for something. "They're coming later to receive my answer, they should be here in a few-" Before he could finish his answer there was pounding on the door, well speak of the devil.

"Thorin wipe off the paste, I'll be back." Angrily I opened the barn door to see Fenris, the commander of my armies who immediately bowed along with the rest of his group.

"My Queen! I did not realize you were here."

"I did not realize someone gave the order to threaten my friend, who ordered that Beorn would have to give up his wood for the herb?"

"Well, you did my Queen." I was taken aback, and I could hear gasps behind me. The dwarves watched as I went from angry to absolutely furious.

"I gave no such command, for I haven't been in contact with anyone for quite some time. Where did you hear about this?"

"Lani showed us the paper you supposedly signed, that anyone we give supplies to must pay tribute in return and if not, they shall be imprisoned or worse...be sentenced to death."

@fili-is-my-lover @kirenia15 @lunariasilver @depressedchilipepper @tschrist1 @ayamenimthiriel @ask-the-elf-stuff

[heartbreakgrill]

Did You Get the Sensation Today? (Flirting in Walmart, Pt. 3); Calum Hood

a/n: yeah❤️

description: you’re the opening act for 5sos and your boyfriend is the bass player. just cute and fluffy.

“Y/N! How’s the metronome in your ear?”

You fumbled with your earpiece, only looking up from where your eyes were boring into the floor because of the voice resounding around the room. Your eyes lifted to glance in the general area of the sound technician and your ears began to focus on the beeping in your left ear.

“Good!” You mumbled into your microphone. “Little more, like 1 notch.”

He turned it up and you nodded. “Thanks!”

You went back to twisting the wire around the ear piece, struggling to get it to stay out of the curve of your lobe. You jumped when you felt warm hands move yours away and adjust the wire.

“Hey, love, s’just me,” Cal spoke through a soft smile, “did I scare ya?”

“Yeah, I didn’t even know you’d gotten here yet,” you grinned, looking to him. You tossed your arms around his neck and pulled him down to your level.

He kissed you gently, fingers moving to cradle your jaw and waist carefully. You tugged yourself away and removed your hands, not wanting to make any of the crew uncomfortable with your affection. Cal reached to squeeze your hand before walking away, most likely to the dressing room.

You wrapped up with the sound guy, sang through a portion of your songs, and were sent away to retrieve the boys for their turn. You giddily pranced down the hallway, reaching their door quickly.

You knocked before shoving your hands into the back pockets of your jeans. You waited three seconds before Michael opened the door. Moose ran out and circled around your feet.

You cooed at him as you moved into the room. Nickelback was, of course, playing, and Ashton was drumming his heart on his drum pads. He stopped to wave at you before wiping away a beat of sweat on his forehead and jumping back in.

Luke was sat in front of a mirror, examining his eyes, which Sierra had been helping him learn to put makeup on. She sat next to him, giggling at something he said. Crystal wasn’t here, most likely catching up on sleep, and Calum was on the couch. His leg was tucked under the other, Converse-clad foot tapping against carpeted floor. You hadn’t even noticed his outfit earlier, but now you were pleased with the black skinny jeans and green Empathy hoodie.

You moved to him, grinning wider now, and plopped beside him. He looked up from his phone and smiled at you. “Hey, lovie.”

He reached out a hand, cupping your cheek. Calum kissed you as your hand balanced against his forearm.

“Hey,” you separated, bit your lip as a blush painted your expression. “How was press?”

“Good. The same old, but today we actually played a fun game with reading Tweets from fans,” he began.

You moved so you were facing him, hugging your knees to your chest. Nonchalantly, he pulled your legs over his lap; “Someone asked if we were dating. And then in another interview, the lady asked if I was still single.”

You tilted your head as it leaned against your palm. “Did you tell them?”

“Slightly,” he scrunched up his face. “I said that I was seeing someone. But I didn’t wanna violate your privacy without your permission.”

You shrugged, and tugged one of his hands into your lap, “I think you should. Honestly, let’s post an Instagram photo right now.”

“Yeah?” He said, excitedly.

“Mhm,” you flicked your brows up with assurance.

He picked his phone up again, wrapping an arm around your shoulders. Calum flushed your side against his, pressing his cheek to yours. You didn’t even have to smile because one was already grinning on your lips. Calum took one like that, then kissed your cheek. In the third, his fingers pushed up your tshirt and tickled the skin. You laughed loudly, shoving your face into his neck. He texted the photos to you, then opened Instagram.

“sending love from my girl and i”

You opened the tag notification and automatically liked it. The caption made your heart swoon. You grabbed his face by the chin and kissed him again.

“Go to sound check, you absolute sweetheart.”

The boys all left you and Sierra to a silent room, Luke having turned off Nickelback for the time being. She sunk into the couch next to you with a sigh.

“How ya doing?” She asked, raising her eyebrows curiously.

You breathed deeply and responded, “Falling. Fast.”

She laughed, “I noticed. You okay with it?”

“Ya know, I think I am,” you looked her straight in the eye and nodded. “Wanna come help me get ready?”

“Yes!”

You abandoned the boys’ room for your own, slightly smaller dressing room. It was right next door, fit with a small couch, a vanity, and a an unopened rack of your clothing. You took a seat at the vanity, Sierra plopping into the couch again. “Helping” you get ready meant choosing music, curling the pieces of hair you couldn’t reach, and picking out shoes that matched your belt.

Tonight’s outfit was red fishnets, a black corduroy skirt, and a shirt which you still hadn’t figured out. You were half dressed, even in your platform combat boots, tearing through the rack in search of a shirt. Nothing was fitting your taste, and you were slightly frustrated. Sierra had long since left to find water, which you had drank the last of in your dressing room.

You pulled on your other tshirt and walked to the boys’ dressing room. They had just gotten back, though Ashton and Michael were apparently still doing something onstage. Luke was picking through his rack and Calum was at his own things, shirtless, still in his black skinny jeans.

“Hey, again,” Luke laughed at your appearance. “You ready?”

“Always!” You grinned. “I love doing smaller crowds.”

“Same,” Luke replied before going back to his things.

Calum sent you a wave while continuing to go through his rack. “You look cute tonight. I love the fishnets.”

“Thanks,” you sighed, “they’re new.”

“What’s wrong?” He turned to you, leaning against the crate with his arm.

You stuck your hands on your hips, “I didn’t buy a shirt to go with it.”

Calum hummed in response. He looked you up and down, tapped his chin, and turned back to his things. He flicked through hangers before pulling out your favorite shirt of his.

“Wanna borrow this?” He held it out to you.

Your eyes widened, along with your lips. You hesitantly reached for the hanger, “Really?”

He shrugged. “Yeah. It matches pretty well. And you look good in my things, so. It might be big, but if you tie it in a knot at the front, it’ll work.”

You took it from him before launching forward to give him a big kiss. “Thanks so much. Love you.”

You were out the door before he could respond or you could process what you just said. Luke grinned at his hands, tossing his head over to look at Cal.

“You good?”

Calum was bright red, from the tips of his tattoos to the curve of his ears, his skin was warm and his stomach tingley.

“I-“ he held up his hands in question. “I just...I would’ve said it back. But she...” he whistled. Calum shook his head and returned to finding a shirt.

You didn’t see Calum again until after your set. You could tell the vast majority of the fans recognized the shirt- it was a small show- and you enjoyed getting to tease their minds with the idea. In general, you felt so confident in his shirt, smelling of his cigarettes and cologne and your own coconut perfume.

You knew he was watching, swung your hips more during the curves of your songs. At the end, you thanked everyone and strutted off. You b-lined for Calum once your mic was given to a stage hand.

He covered you in his hands, kisses, the silk of his button up all you saw as his lips molded into your own.

“I love you, too. Oh, and please wear my shirt more often.”

TAG LIST: @dinosaursandsocks @everydayimfangirling @truly-charmed @wallows-spring @oopsiedoopsie23 @cuddlyklaus @mantlereid , @boxofteenageideas , @ashhdaniellee95 @stephaniemelville-blog @zhangyixingxing1

[ohnopoe]

Do I Wanna Know? | Chapter .02

Ship: Obi-Wan Kenobi x Reader Word Count: 4.4k+ Tagging: @hawkerz12​ & @slowlywithfreedom​ & @itsjammin​ Warnings: SMUT. Author’s Notes: If you’re under 18, stay away from this fic. This is not a suggestion. It is against the law for you to be reading this if you are under 18.

Part One was originally titled ‘Daydreaming’ but then it became a series, so I figured it needed a name change. Sorry for any confusion!

Kinktober Prompt: Anonymous Sex & Blindfolds

Part One | Part Two | Part Three (coming soon!)

The rules were simple. Your blindfold had to remain on at all times even in the dim light of the room, and you couldn’t tell them who you were. In all honesty, most avoided talking as much as possible, desperate to fulfil fantasies without reality crashing down around them, and you were more than willing to go along with the unspoken additional rule.

The lights were already dimmed as you entered the room, cold and emotionless blue that only skimmed along where the wall met the floor. It was too dark for even shadows to form, giving you peace of mind. Whoever this stranger might be, they had no chance of knowing your face, nor you theirs. You could barely make out the shape of your own hand before your face as you took in what you could tell of the odd room. There was a bed, neither gaudy nor shabby, and what looked like they could be ropes tied to the solid frame. Well, that was certainly something to keep in mind if this went well.

But you didn’t have long, you knew that. Your fellow anonymous patron would be joining you shortly, and the instructions the helpful desk clerk had given you had been clear and comforting as your anxiety had risen upon your arrival in the odd club.

If it had been anyone other than Shaak Ti that had recommended the place, you would have seriously questioned their sanity, but those few words the Togrutan had offered had been reassuring. This was a place for those who needed a release, whether they couldn’t have the person they were after, or whether they didn’t have someone in mind at all. It was the perfect thing for a jedi like yourself, with no way of somehow falling into an emotional connection and attachment that came with an actual relationship. From the look in her eye, she was certainly speaking from experience, and that fact alone gave an awful lot of comfort.

You removed your clothes carefully, hesitating slightly as your finger danced over the strap of your bra. But it was dark, there was no need for modesty, and having your stranger try to remove the clothing in the minimal light might only cause further problems, and so your underwear joined your robes. With your clothes folded in a careful pile on the small shelves near the door, you shuddered a breath, attempting to remain calm and ignore the cold bite of air against your bared skin.

This was so different from anything you had ever tried before, so void of emotion and care and all the things that had drawn you into the horny mess you had found yourself in earlier. But this wasn’t romance, this was about release, about letting yourself give in to what was only natural, without the consequences that could bring you so much trouble in the real world.

Still, your mind could run free here. You could pretend the man you would spend time with was the Jedi your heart craved, you could pretend for just a moment, that he wanted you as you wanted him.

The strip of black silk sat awkward in your hand, the final act you would need to perform before going into this. With half your face covered you would be shrouded in anonymity, and with your sight gone, so would he. You stared at the fabric, as if it might hold the mysteries of the galaxy, the answers to solve the war, and tell you what to do, all in one.

Closing your eyes, you felt the smooth blindfold, running it between your fingers as it draped over your wrist. In another time, another life, you could almost imagine the feel of it wrapped tightly around your wrist, holding you still against your bed, leaving you to the mercy of the man you craved. He could be so teasing at times, would he be teasing then? Would he lavish your body as you desired, or leave you wanting, drawing out your desire until you could take no more?

Well, you certainly weren’t worried about being worked up for what was to come with thoughts like that. With a gulp, you sat at the edge of the bed, eyeing the small button that lay at the wall that would tell them you were ready. Yes, you thought resolutely, you could do this.

You fit the blindfold tightly, ensuring it would not slip from your eyes before you lay back against the silken sheets. It was soft and cold against your skin, prickling your nerves into attention as you settled yourself before reaching up and pressing the button.

The door opened only moments later, a swoosh of machinery and then footsteps, soft and gentle. You couldn’t hear boots or shoes of any kind against the cold floor, and it made you intrigued. Was he already undressed? Was that the norm? The sound of the door shutting once more startled you.

He moved slowly into the room, with an air of uncertainty you could almost feel rolling off him. Perhaps this was a bad idea, perhaps the clerk had been wrong, had found you someone that was not as compatible as you had hoped. But then, in the darkness, what could he even see to reject?

But he didn’t stop, not entirely, making his way towards you in the darkness, slowly. Perhaps it was hesitation that held back his movements, perhaps it was something more primal. You could give into your imaginations here, could pretend it was Obi-Wan stepping into the room, his gaze hungry as he drank in the sight of you laying there just for him, primal and fierce as he held back from ravaging you.

You could feel the shift of the bed as he found his way to you, the way the soft fabric pulled taut beneath you with the movement of his knee coming to kneel beside you in the silence. Your breath caught in anticipation, feeling the warmth from the man at your side seeping into your waist, but he did not touch you.

With your bottom lip drawn in-between your teeth you lay there waiting, unsure whether you ought to be making the first move, but it was hard to initiate anything when you were the one with your eyes covered behind a silken mask. Still, your hand moved from where it lay at your side, seeking out the man and following his warmth to find his thigh. A jolt of surprise seemed to come from the man at the slightest touch, but he didn’t push your hand away as you traced lightly over bare skin. Well, at least you weren’t the only one naked.

Hands found yours, holding them for the slightest moment in such an innocent manner, before he gently lead them up to the bars of the bed. His hold was careful, almost tender, and oddly reassuring, and he squeezed your hands once before leaving them to hold the bars.

Fingers, light and careful traced down your bare arms, tickling the skin with the airy touch as he explored his way slowly in the dark. And then it was gone, teasing you forwards, searching for some kind of contact. But before you could lift your hands from their spot, he was back, shifting over you, bracing his weight with one hand by your head as he leant forwards.

His lips seemed to hover over your wrists, pressing against your pulse point tenderly, but leaving no question that he was asking they remain where they were. And so began their journey. He seemed to take a delight in the softest of kisses against your arms as he travelled lower, the lightness of his touch making you crave something more. And was that the feel of hair surrounding those lips, or were you simply imagining it, desperate for his lips to be those of the jedi you craved?

His mouth found your neck in your distracted thinking, nuzzling there for a moment before descending with more vigour. He seemed to home in just above your collarbone, dragging his teeth over the skin before licking at it quickly. The rough feel of his beard and teeth followed by the quick warm wetness of his tongue had you offering an unearthly moan, diminishing any fears that this might not be as good as you needed it to be.

But then he was moving once more, sooner than you would have liked, his touch light once more as he ran a single finger down between the valley of your breasts. He only seemed to come to a stop when he reached your navel, and you could have easily thought he was in a hurry had he not paused there, hands dancing over skin lightly, exploring you with his touch.

It was only when his breath danced across your torso, warm and shuddering before placing the lightest of kisses against your heated skin that you realised what had felt so odd about the situation. You had expected a certain lack of intimacy, after all, this stranger was seeking out something he couldn’t find otherwise, just as you were. But, somehow, you hadn’t expected him to avoid your lips so determinedly.

You could feel the rough hair of his beard as he grew more confident, his lips replacing those nimble fingers as he sucked your nipple into perfect pertness, drawing you achingly forwards with a sigh as his hand settled on your waist. He ran his tongue over the pert bud, lapping at it with such skill that you couldn’t help but marvel at the sensation. If he was this good with your tit, you could only imagine what it would feel like to have that marvellous tongue tracing over your clit.

It seemed you weren’t the only one with such a line of thought as he began to draw away from your breast, placing a gentle teasing kiss against your suddenly neglected other nipple before descending down. His lips and tongue made an expedition as they traversed your body, darting out to place the lightest of kisses against your skin, to lick at the flesh that felt so heated.

He found your folds with determination, placing an irritatingly soft kiss against you before running a finger along your slit. You were already so wet, a mixture of the man’s actions and your own imagination building within you. It was easy for him to move amongst your slickness, to trace over your clit so lightly that you were jolting your hips forwards in surprise. A deep chuckle reverberated against your skin at the action, and you could so easily imagine it was Obi-Wan worshiping your body. And just like that he found you, his lips pressing a kiss, more firm this time, against your aching clit as his finger traced idly between the swollen bud and your opening.

You couldn’t help but sigh in relief. It wasn’t much, but it was pressure, friction, and you craved it desperately. He took no hesitation in working your body, darting his tongue out to run over your sensitive bundle of nerves as his finger entered you slowly. It was almost torturously slow, as if testing the limits, and it made it so very easy to imagine it was a fair beard that sat between your thighs when you felt the trepidation of his touch against you. Yes, Obi-Wan would be careful, he wouldn’t want to push you, he would look up at you with such wonder- you had to bite your lip at the thought, hands racing down to find the man’s hair, eagerly egging him on.

He certainly seemed to get the hint as his finger began to move in and out slowly, still wary until a moan escaped you. It was too slow, too little, you needed more. With a light tug of his hair, you silently pleaded for more.

His beard rubbed roughly against the inside of your thigh as he placed a kiss there, slow and open mouthed before he returned those glorious lips to your clit, a second finger joining the first with a curl, before he was moving once more, finding a faster pace within you.

The pressure was perfect, rough pads of his fingertips running against your inner walls as he worked your body. And then he was moving again, just as you felt tension begin to rise in your body. With a frustrated sigh, you felt his weight shift down the bed, and then his finger, wet with your slick, moved to your clit, and oh kriff was that his tongue against your cunt?

Thoughts were jumbled in your mind as he curled his tongue against you, entering you slowly. It was shallow and did little to fill you, but his tongue was warm and wet and in that moment of bliss you were determined to do whatever you could to give him just as much pleasure as he was giving you in the moment.

You could feel the tension building within you, every swipe of his tongue, every time he ran that rough finger over your sensitive clit, bringing you ever closer.

You were so close.

Would he feel like this? Would he pleasure and worship your body? Would he roll his tongue against you again and again- your hips jutted forwards of their own accord, hand tightening in his hair as your imagination drew on reality for inspiration.

He was above you, hovering above you with those marvellous arms that you had gazed at far more than you ought to have holding his weight. Fair hair and a mischievous grin as he would look up at you, catching your gaze with that infamous smug smirk playing on his lips, those same lips that moved against you…

Your orgasm came suddenly, violently taking over your body as you seized against him. Muscles clenched, and it was all you could do to only let out the moan that ripped from you without drawing out a string of words along with it. Yes, yes! your mind screamed, uttering a string of profanities and praise that you wouldn’t dare let fall from your mouth.

Still, he stayed with you throughout your orgasm, lapping up your juices in gentle movements, careful not to startle your sensitive clit as he cleaned you up with his tongue.

It wasn’t until your hand, forgotten in his hair, tugged lightly against him that he moved from you, watching the rise and fall of your chest as your breath evened out as you came down from your high.

He didn’t make a move against you, didn’t rush to find his own release, or hurry you in any form. You could feel the solid weight of him above you, watching as you relaxed before him, marvelling in the sight as his own imagination played over the sound of your release over and over in his mind.

You were slow to move, rolling him off you with a hand to his shoulder as you began to sit up, still revelling in the feeling of bliss that had taken over your body. But you were determined nonetheless, a tongue like that… you couldn’t hope to compare, but you would do your damnedest to try.

With your hand on his shoulders still, you swung your legs over the edge of the bed, determined not to lose him to the pitch black of your blindfolded gaze. Your feet felt unsettled as they met that cold ground once more, still weak from the feeling he had brought from his tongue, but you wouldn’t be on them for long. Your hand reached out in the darkness, running down his arm until you found his grasp and could lead him off the bed with you.

You could practically feel his curiosity radiating off him, but you quickly closed your mind to the feeling. It wasn’t a stranger’s curiosity that you wanted to have in your mind in this moment, you needed your imagination to remain in tact, to keep those images coming of the fair haired jedi master you longed for.

Standing before him, your hands slowly tracing over his waist with a light touch that mimicked his own. The feel of muscles, taut but not overdone lingered beneath your touch, only helping tempt your mind into images you could not see.

Those bright eyes would be shining down on you, watching with intrigue as you discovered his body, memorising the feel of one another in soft, slow movements. Those beautiful lips, pulled between his teeth in an effort to hold back a moan as your fingertips traced lower, finding that trail of hair that lead to where you both wanted your touch to be.

With one hand taking its place on his hip, the other ran down his thigh, marvelling at the feel of his toned leg beneath your touch. It was just as you had imagined the Jedi master would feel, muscular without being overdone, all that physical training shining through, just as they did through his khaki cotton trousers.

You had to use him to steady yourself as you lowered yourself to your knees, hearing a shuddering sigh at the action. Well, he certainly didn’t seem against your plan if that was any indicator.

Your fingertips traced over warm skin, drawing patterns as you explored further, inching towards your goal at an excruciatingly slow pace. Until you found him, hard as can be, practically laying against his toned stomach, aching to be touched.

With your hands lightly running over his straining cock, you could feel him thrusting forwards at the slightest contact before he rocked back on his feet, almost apologetically. A smile played on your face at the feel. If the strain of his cock hadn’t shown how eager he was, the way he couldn’t control his movements certainly did. You tightened your grip around him, allowing some pressure as you ran your hand up and down his length, creating a picture in your mind from the feel of him.

He was long and thick and utterly perfect, from what you could tell. You could practically imagine that pleasant feel of him stretching you out, slow and steady as he settled within you, and it was all you could do to not let your hand fall between your legs to relieve the already growing pressure there.

With your thumb tracing over his head, feeling the precum that settled beneath the pad of your thumb, you couldn’t help but smirk into the darkness. With your other hand moving gently along his length, you brought your thumb to your lips, tasting the salty sweetness he already had for you. You wanted more, and if the shuddering sigh that fell from his lips was any indicator, he wasn’t complaining about the idea either.

Slowly you edged your way forwards in the dark, hollowing your cheeks as your lips circled his cock. You moved gently, taking what you could inch by inch, allowing him to succumb to the feeling of your warm wet mouth wrapped around him.

“Maker,” the word was quiet, an uttered sigh as the man above you fell forwards into the sensation of your lips around him, but it was enough to have you startling backwards. That voice, it was familiar, too familiar.

You rocked back, mouth falling from his cock as you sat on the back of your heels, tilting your head up towards where you assumed he must be. Oh, how you wished that damned blindfold was gone, how you wished you could see the man before you, to confirm or damn the suspicions that his single word had brought nagging to your mind.

But the rules were clear. You weren’t to say who you were, just as he wasn’t to say anything that could help identify him either. And you were clinging to that rule, the only thing keeping you from crashing in the moment.

It couldn’t be him, you thought with determination, torn between desperately wanting to rid the thought from your mind, and the excitement you felt at the sheer possibility. Perhaps you didn’t really want to know, perhaps you could simply use that single word to help paint a picture that matched your imaginings, that helped you pretend it really was the man you dreamt of. Perhaps that was enough.

But you had been still too long, having pulled away from the throbbing of his cock as quickly as you had descended upon it, and he clearly realised his mistake. A sigh, one that did nothing to rid your thoughts of the jedi master who held your thoughts, fell from his lips as his hand reached down, comfortingly stroking along the side of your face, slowly drifting down your jaw almost apologetically. And then he did the one thing you could never forgive, he spoke again.

“I-I’m so sorry,” you startled back at the sound once more, pushing away from him further in shock. Another sigh came from the man, but it was barely heard over your own thumping heartbeat in your ears. “I haven’t done this before,” he continued, and there was no longer any room for question. You knew that voice too well, you had spent so much of your free time replaying it in your head, you could practically conjure the sound in your mind, hearing words he would never say to you in your mind, helping you when you had only your hand for company.

You couldn’t decide what to do. If you stopped he might grow suspicious, might seek you out with the force, may find out just who it was he had been delving into with his tongue only moments earlier. You couldn’t have that, you didn’t want to deal with the shame, with the rejection as he learnt it was you. But then, was it right to continue when you now knew who he was? When the mystery was lost for only one of you, and anonymity failed. Was it a breach of his privacy to know him so intimately when he didn’t even know it was you?

Heartache and guilt, it was a tough combination. You could either give yourself up and face the harsh heartbreak of the man you loved turning you away, or you could never meet his gaze again for the shame of it. You knew it was no real question, you had to do what was right, and perhaps one day you may be able to laugh over the situation, but never tell him that he was the very being that had brought you there in the first place.

You pushed yourself off the floor, moving slowly in the darkness, not daring to touch him as you raised yourself up. If you took off the blindfold would you see his eyes? What would they convey? How would he react to your reveal? You couldn’t muster the courage to meet his gaze, keeping the silky material firmly in place as your head hung low before him.

You had to say something, something that would reveal you to him as he had unintentionally done to you, but words seemed lost to you. How could you tell him it was no longer anonymous, that it wasn’t simply some stranger who had their mouth around his thick cock moments earlier, but a colleague, a friend.

“I’m so sorry,” your words echoed his, but the tone was so very different. Where he had been apologetic, you were sympathetic, soft and simply sad, as if you didn’t truly want him to hear your voice, as if you simply couldn’t bare what was to come.

You could feel him stumble backwards, the heat of his naked body falling away from you as he struggled to make sense of what he had heard. He couldn’t be hearing right, he must have been too far in his own mind, mixing reality with fantasy. He needed to be certain of what he had heard, of who he had heard.

The feel of his hand gently cupping your face shocked you, having expected him to practically run from you at your soft words. But instead he ran his thumb over your cheek, curious and timid, trying to make sense of what he had heard.

“Is it really-”

“Don’t,” you cut off his question, your tone almost begging, as you clung to that rule the establishment held in place as if it were the only thing keeping you from drowning in despair. You couldn’t tell him, couldn’t say the words, nor your name. Instead, you simply hung your head low, your resignation answering what your voice could not.

Silence seeped its way into the room, thick and awkward as you let the realisation sink in for him as it had done for you. But even as the moment drew on, he remained there, hand still hovering against your cheek as if frozen in place by that one damning word.

“Do you want to stop?” you had to ask, someone had to take control of the situation, and judging by the tone of his voice he was in no position to do so. You were almost thankful he was distracted, barely hearing your words and missing the way your tone gave you away in disappointment at the very thought.

“I- well-” Obi-Wan stumbled over his words, and you could almost feel his gaze flittering over your naked form, but whether it was in surprise or something else you could not tell.

“I-” you started once more, voice small and insecure as you gave in, giving him an out despite yourself. “I won’t be upset if you don’t want to do this- if you don’t want to do this with me.”

But it was a lie, one you were putting your all into hiding. The truth was you would be hurt, far more hurt than you could ever imagine being, the word heartbroken rang in your mind, no matter how much you tried to push it away. If he didn’t want you, especially after how eagerly his body had seemed to react to yours, well, your dreams were at an end.

But you remained resolute, raising your head as if you could see him, as if you were as strong as you pretended to be. This would not break you. His rejection would not break you. No, if any of this was going to break you, it would be in the comfort of your room, where no one could see your tears.

“Perhaps,” he sounded uncertain, as if he were torn even as he spoke. He cleared his throat, that harsh sound of discomfort seeping into your bones as you waited for the rejection you knew was coming. “Perhaps, it would be for the best.”