#i wanna go back and rewatch but for now my thoughts

[hellishvxbes]

𝐇𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐔𝐕𝐀 𝐁𝐎𝐒𝐒 𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐓𝐒

Under a read more cuz its gonna get long. anyways, spoilers blah blah blah dont read if you wanna be spoiled

ALRIGHT.

First thing I'mma talk about is Millie and how I am afraid for Moxxie and Millie's marriage.

The fact that she is not excited about this pregnancy can be for a multitude of reasons. For every sad fuck who wants to project homophobia on her cuz she wanted to off two gay guys, so fuck yourself. Not only is she moody, everyone is seeing a family. A FAMILY. KIDS. Moxxie making his stance very clear that this was something he would step aside from if they went through with it. Moxxie already seems like he would LOVE to have kids.

She talked to her sister about it, and while she said she feels a little better, she still seems to have your doubts. Kids is so important to bring up to your parent BEFORE you get married. not everyone wants them. the reason me and this dude i knew from the beginning weren't gonna get along was cuz he wanted kids and I did not. for my own reasons. none of which are anyone's business. if the case that millie and moxxie did not have this conversation, it could rock their relationship pretty hard if Millie doesn't want to keep it. and there's a billion ways she could go about it. and not telling Moxxie right away, kind of scares me. but whatever her choice is, its her choice. it could be just, shes worried about how they will afford to raise a child, bringing a child into this world, maybe she isnt sure she'd be a good mother. maybe shes not ready to surrender what she has right now to take care of a child. there's so much that goes into it. but one way or another, i feel like moxxie might push a little too hard and it comes out in all the wrong ways. I just. they are so wholesome to me, they aren't perfect but they work on things so well SO LIKE IM SUPER WORRIED FOR MY BABIES.

SECONDLY. OCTAVIA

Now we've only really seen snippets and shes been the total cliches of a teenage daughter. Im really happy to see more and god I felt her pain so much. my situation is different, i want my parents to get fucking divorced, my father is an asshole and I tell my mom everyday how I would back her if she really wanted to leave my dad. it never happens tho. because they are looked up to members of the church, because divorce is against their religion. its just so infuriating seeing how much they dont like each other and they staying together. i hate hearing them fight. or when they bring me into their fights. each one talking about the other to me while i keep saying their marriage isn't mine to fix.

a lot of things octavia sang about were things I feel about my mom. I have a lot of anger and resentment for her, how she always chooses everyone else over me. and how everything just turns out a disappoint or a lie. so I see where her anger lies when she said Stolas choose 'him' over her. Her 'yeah I'll be okay but I'll never be the same' and honestly, stolas is a lot to blame for this. its hard being in a loveless relationship. especially when a child is involved, but all this, had he done it sooner when she was a child, it would still have some effects but i think it wouldn't have been as bad. Idk honestly if Octavia can see what a piling of shit her mother is BUT I DIGRESS. shes taking a decision, shes choosing to cut him out. maybe it will change but for now, that is where her mind and heart are at. shes protecting herself from more heart and disappointment despite how we all know she still loves and misses her dad. that will never change.

i love this bit of symbolism at looking at parts of his garden are already dying. plants need neutering, they need proper attention for them to grow, the same way every child needs their parent. it really shows how stolas's absence will change her.

2 points here. who the fuck is she talking to on the phone

and WHY ARE THEY ONLY RESORTED TO EVIL LAUGHTER. like okay i get you won. but is that honestly it from these two?? i want more from them, I know andre is more the brains here, but like, there needs to be more.

NEXT IS STOLAS

baby was having such a hard time, and he will still struggle. people being like 'he JUST now realizing he's poor' no he's been noticed, hes been in shock. like hes' literally just been holding it in, trying not to make a fuss about it cuz theres not much either him or stolas can do. the moment blitz is like 'you're gonna need to start making money come in now too right' he loses it cuz hes never had to work for anything in his life. it was inherited to him. the thought of actually being in the working class, working on a holiday , yeah like allll us bitches already know the struggle. hes brand baby new. so he has a breakdown. he says he was stupid, cuz at this point?? he doesn't think blitz would do the same for him. giving his life up for someone who doesnt see him the same way he does.

stolas punching him was a much needed thing to do, cuz everything else aside this motherfucker was fucking cheering for him to lose everything. fabricated everything. its really this guys fault for taking it this far. he absolutely deserved that. I also love the way andre was like fuck the goetia i'm gonna fucking kill you. also stolas's 'do it, pussy' WAS SO GOOD. HOW DEEP HIS VOICE GOT.

the way i snorted at this

the ending was sweet, the dance between stolas and blitz was cuteee but its gonna take time before these two can officially be happy. stolas is probably not gonna be with him fully until he has octavia. gets a chance to really explain himself to her. cuz right now, it would look like shes right if he allowed them to be together. and i know its what stolas wants deep down, but for him, his child comes first. and its cause some riffs, cuz blitz seems to finally come to terms with his feelings for him but stolas is now unsure. theres a lot more to consider now. and as a parent? its so hard to want to have things for yourself, when it will affect your child. and we know stolas feels the same, he wasn't upset anymore when he saw blitz risking his life to save his. his attitude toward that bit did change, now its other things that will keep them from being happy rn.

blitz bring up his sister hit a very hard place for me. one I can't even fully talk about for reasons I can't explain either. i just know how hard it is to, lose a sibling you were close to, and suddenly youre strangers. you learn to move on and adapt, but theres still that feeling. and soooo much shit that goes into it but yeah. emotions are abound yall

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s4 episode 5 thoughts

i’m back. i’m back and i’m intrigued. because i'm reading the episode description, and if we get more mulder ex lore here, which the episode description makes it sound like we will, i am… not sure how i will feel on the subject. the term “reincarnation” makes it sound like whoever it was… died. did an ex of his die? and that is a lot of mulder marked by pain and suffering. and maybe i’m getting ahead of myself. but the writers KNOW we want our agents to smooch, so focusing on an ex might make me, the viewer, feel weird. i just need to get all these thoughts out in writing before we begin.

how is he gonna tell if someone is a reincarnated lover? or am i misunderstanding this entirely. 

only one way to find out

author’s note: oh my gosh…… nothing could have prepared me for this. at all. here i was thinking it was ex lore time, but it was past life time, and there are TEARS in my eyes.

(serious author's note: i ask for some grace in this episode recap. there may be some things i word poorly. i am familiar with the terminology used to describe DID, and did my best, but acknowledge that i may have come up short. please understand that this is intended to capture my live reactions to what i was seeing for the very first time. at times here, there are no reactions, just a sort of a nebulous recapping of what i saw because i was feeling So Many Things. so this one might be messy, and i hope that is okay. i don't understand what i am feeling, but i am feeling a Lot of it, and humbly ask for your patience in my clumsy wording as well as some helpful discussion on what just went down)

let us begin, i type as i sniff up some tears

we open with mulder in a field… is he reciting poetry? and looking very sad. 

wait, is he not actually reciting poetry and he just talks like that? while holding two pictures of old timey people. i’d guess civil war era.

okay. so now we jump right to the intro. that was quick. i’m still processing what we just saw because we were really dropped into that one with no context whatsoever.

federal agents break into a temple in tennessee. they’re looking for illegal firearms! and a guy named ephesian.

but mulder sees a window… and he is staring at it… walking out the door as if led by some sort of spiritual quest while scully yells his name and wonders wtf he’s doing. he is not responding to her at all, but she’s chasing after him because she is a good friend.

so he’s hearing things while scully is pulling her gun out, and it does appear that he found a trapdoor!

he busts in, and slaps some poison out of the hand of a woman who was taking sips, and then grabs the dude who i assume is the cult leader. whew… that was close

now they’re at some sort of meeting, listening to tapes, and skinner is here!!! hiiii skinner. everybody say hi skinner!

so, someone on the tape seems to be whistleblowing on this cult- the seven stars or something- saying that the leader is hurting children and stockpiling weapons. mulder looks incredibly pensive during all of this.

oh! someone refers to mulder as “our man spooky”, which is kind of hilarious, while complaining that the reports were weak. scully leans in and asks yeah, how did he know that? while the men are fighting.

and skinner yells KNOCK IT OFF!!!! because the folks at the compound were somehow able to hide all the evidence before they got there, and now they’re forced to hold ephesian and “his wives” on “BS charges”. so now the agents MUST find evidence of firearms and who the informant was NOW because they will try to get an arraignment fast.

woah. no pressure.

skinner comes over talk to mulder and scully- they must look into this ephesian fellow's claims of supernatural abilities. scully says he can use the book of revelations to manipulate his followers, but seems to suspect no real powers. 

they to talk to this ephesian fellow, who says he knew for 9 centuries that scully was coming, and starts going on about the bible, quoting stuff. very scary behavior.

mulder comes in with the fact check. jesus said that at smyrna, not about some church in tennessee! (his knowledge…. it always impresses me)

this dude is being super creepy, telling them to put aside their investigation “for your own souls”, because soon all unfaithful shall “be destroyed by God’s mighty men”. so this is some pretty standard cult rhetoric here. if you've studied religions, you've heard this one many times. it seems that ephesian thinks he and his people shall be the ones doing this violence. a tight zoom in on mulder’s troubled face as he quotes more scripture.

they have 6 wives to question, and mulder says to start with one in particular. interesting… i wonder why that one. is it because she was the one they caught ephesian with in the hidden area... or something more?

her name is melissa, and she says she’s 25 as she smokes a cigarette and dodges their questions. she’s been at the compound and married to ephesian for a year. 

mulder asks if it troubles her that ephesian has so many other wives, and she just recites scripture instead of answering. so scully comes in with the “i’d have a tough time if my husband had so many children with other women”. this seems to begin to get her to crack, as she tears up.

wait... it’s so wrong to hear scully call someone else, who isn't her sister, melissa :(

melissa she doesn’t have any children with ephesian yet... because he has to wait for God to tell him that the right soul is ready to be reincarnated, which is why his children are the most sacred members of the temple. naturally, of course /s

things get quiet when they ask if he had been hurting the children until melissa starts talking with a very different voice and set of mannerisms, and she no longer replies to the name melissa. so scully scrawls “multiple personality” in her loopy handwriting and passes it over to mulder. oh! is this sydney?

(at this point, i shall begin to refer to sydney with he/him pronouns, as this is what mulder does. normally i would stick to my journalistic integrity and keep reporting the things i wrote down incorrectly while watching the episode, but i'm trying to be very respectful- i hope you understand)

but mulder writes back to scully no, this is not a multiple personality case, it's a past life case! his handwriting is very blocky. to prove his point, he asks sydney who the current president is, and he responds that it is harry truman. ah. so, he's a few years off.

mulder claims that “somehow he just knew” sydney was melissa's past life, which doesn’t reveal a lot, but his eyes are very soulful and i want to hold his hand.

skinner says they need to find something to get this case moving forward, and mulder is like dude, we found sydney, the voice matched! i would agree with his judgement that this in fact a sizeable discovery.

mulder is saying that what they have seen matches the criteria of DID in the DSM4 (woah, need to look up when we switched to 5), but scully is saying that some people don’t even think it exists as a condition, and skinner thinks it could be a trap to buy more time for ephesian. so no one is in agreement here.

but mulder is going into his psychology expert mode and is making a very compelling case that this is an example of DID, particularly in the fact that sydney emerged when the topic of child abuse came up, which fulfilled the protector role. scully wants to know more before giving any sort of diagnosis, but she doesn't seem opposed to the hypothesis.

(skinner seems to fumble over which pronouns to use for each personality here)

skinner says to go ahead and take her back to the compound and see if it gets any results in prompting memories that could be useful to the investigation, but scully is mad at mulder! he didn’t even have the courage to tell skinner he thinks they're dealing with past lives here! mulder, who is usually so brave!!

he mumbles that skinner wouldn’t believe him. which is true.

woah, i don’t know how to interpret this line here, so i’ll just write it down for further analysis:

“i don’t believe that you feel responsible for those 50 lives. or melissa reidel. you are only responsible to yourself, mulder”

(is she saying he doesn’t care about those 50 people?? is she saying he has an ulterior motive? is she calling him a liar, and that he is using this case to gain support for his supernatural ideas?? is she calling him selfish? or is she trying to tell him that he can only be responsible for himself and control his own actions, that he cannot place the burden of saving everyone upon his shoulders? is she berating or reassuring him or both? does she think he isn't serious about the lives in danger?)

i can’t figure it out, but he gets up and leaves. (after watching the episode, i still can't figure it out- what did you think?)

so they take melissa back to the temple, and scully asks her to recall the painful memories so they can keep herself and others safe. it is very tense as she walks into a bedroom and sees many photos on the wall of ephesian and his wives. she knocks some of them over and starts crying.

scully still looks furious with mulder. it's as if she thinks his desire for supernatural entities to be proven comes ahead of his desire to save actual lives, and it's recalling her comparison to ahab during the conversation on the rock. she must feel that there is no time for this, that they need to get concrete answers right away or horrible things will happen; perhaps she thinks he isn't focused, is being fanciful. and i understand the pressure of a ticking clock, but after so long, this rift between them, it doesn't feel right.

oh my goodness, we see some horrific artwork on the wall by the kids at the temple. woah. shoutout to the set design team.

melissa is in the playroom sobbing, but asks why she is being called melissa. scully asks what she should call her, and that is how we meet lily. but lily isn’t there for very long before sydney comes back, saying to “leave the kid alone”. mulder says they can all be safe if they just are told where the guns are. then melissa seems to come back, and she goes back out the window where mulder was staring earlier!!! what does this window know?!?

and the score here is really pretty as she walks outside, scully following behind her. mulder is clearly unwell, though, and scully asks what is wrong, which he ignores and walks past her. typical him.

a new alter of melissa's seems to front, now with a southern accent, saying the guns are in a bunker. but… it’s the civil war she’s talking about. she was a nurse, looking for someone who was staying in tennessee. and she found that someone here, dead. then she was hidden in a bunker while the battle raged above her. it is very horrific, what she is describing.

she clarifies that she was there in november 1863, then turns to mulder and says “as were you”. he doesn’t seem shocked by this, but scully is, as this new southern belle proclaims “this is the field where i watched you die” OH!

(mulder, a confederate in a past life… this is deeply unfortunate)

mulder is trying to make a phone call to a hypnotist while they drive melissa back to the police station, but scully figures out he’s trying to do past life regression on her and says not to. and that her life is in shreds, and that is too much for her to handle. i hate to say it, but i agree with her. melissa has been through so much, and with such a tight deadline, i don't know if they have time for such a journey.

OH! mulder is angry. his voice is all growly as he yells “YOU WERE THERE, SCULLY! you saw it, you heard it, why can’t you feel it?” oh my gosh… the way he slammed his hand on the wheel... why can't she see it, it seems so obvious to him... how infuriating it must be...

scully asks why ephesian is a paranoid sociopath for claiming to be in greece years ago, but he isn’t for claiming to have died in that field……. damn…….

(idk what’s going on here between them exactly but i’m stressed. they are stressing me out)

(at this point, we begin a sequence in which i am so enraptured with what is going on, i have no reactions to all of the things i am seeing, and just recount them to you, with occasional interjections of "oh my god"- but i think if you've seen the episode, you get why it had this effect on me)

so they do get a therapist, who is talking to melissa. she begins to answer the therapist's questions about seeing anything upsetting at the compound, talking about a woman named elizabeth and her son scott, who came to live in the temple. and ephesian took the son away. but ephesian caught his mother visiting her son, and “the mighty men” beat her, which brings melissa to tears as she recounts this. and he hit the boy, calling him garbage, beating him.

scully looks very stressed in the background to hear all of this, but sydney is now fronting at this point, saying to leave melissa alone, and that the guns are in the bunkers… somewhere. where they are is a mystery, though.

scully leans down to mulder and says that maybe there is a map somewhere, but mulder says she knows where to find them. and at this she says “mulder…” in a very breathy fashion and i still can’t quite articulate what is going on between them…. but he’s going in.

he says it’s me, melissa, and asks her to go back to the field. “your eyes may have changed shade, but it cannot color the soul behind them”, she says. that they are only to meet in passing in this life. and she misses him. he just stared and stares, before his head falls into his hands

scully is trying to explain to him that this is a product of melissa's illness, and she can’t give any specifics- no names or locations, and they don’t have time to do this, because ephesian’s arraignment is in two hours.

“wouldn’t you, scully? wouldn’t anybody?” <- oh my god…. is he compelled by a terrible sense of duty or by his own curiosity? is she scared to watch him go down this path he cannot return from?

okay, so now he is going back into his past lives. this sequence is almost entirely a close up of his face, for minutes on end, which adds to the intensity. he's really panting as he remembers. “ghetto streets. shattered glass. bodies of the dead. a jewish woman. poland.” oh my god…… 

he says that he is samantha’s mother in this life; “in this life, she is my son”

his father is dead, and… HIS FATHER IS SCULLY? WHAT? i didn’t see that coming. she’s troubled by this, all of this, not just learning he believes her soul to have been his father before.

but he says that his father is waiting now for their souls to come back together, different, but always together, again and again, to learn.

and he is crying. he can’t go to his father. a gestapo man is there, and he is cancer man; “evil returns as evil, but love… souls mate eternal”. and his wife is melissa, who is taken away to the camps. and he’s crying, and scully is watching with great concern.

now, he’s rising above the field, near the bunker. and his sergeant is also dead, and “he is scully”, and we cut to her face of increasing sadness. sarah holds him, who is melissa. she is sarah kavanaugh, and he is sullivan biddle. she doesn’t know that he’s waiting for her, that they will live again. 

scully tries to ask if he sees any bunkers, but he keeps saying his soul is tired, and he wants to rest.

and this is devastating. it was if i was the one undergoing the hypnosis here. i couldn't look away, i couldn't react, i was so entirely absorbed and confused and busy feeling things.

scully is consulting a map in the town records to try and find this bunker where the weapons are stored, and then she looks up the names he mentioned. sure enough, they are in the county records. then she reaches for some photos, where she finds one of sullivan and sarah. 

a lot of things are being processed in her brain, so we might need to give her a minute. i think we can see some long-held systems of belief being challenged in her mind.

but she brings him back the photos of their past lives, even as she is telling him that ephesian is going to be released soon. why would she do this? to comfort him? to validate him without using words?

oh my god, mulder just called her “dana”. wait. hold on. oh my god, hold on.

“dana, if, um… early in the four years we’ve been working together… an event occurred that suggested or somebody told you that… we’d been friends together in other lifetimes- always- wouldn’t it have changed some of the ways we looked at one another?”

“even if i knew for certain, i wouldn’t change a day”

WAUGHHHHHHHH (ripping my clothes off in grief) WAOUGHHHHHH wouavhhhghhhh……… she wouldn’t change a day….

(and what event was it that he is referring to? is there a certain one...? am i forgetting something from early s1...? damn you, my obsessive note-taking impulses, for not kicking into gear until s2...)

“well… maybe that flukeman thing, i could have lived without that just fine” HDHJSNSME he smiles as she leaves….

(i had to google what that even was because i was like ??? but the flukeman was the season 2 sewer baby!!! for those of you who are going into this whole thing blind and also don't know what the fandom calls stuff! i think to me he was "baby sewer mermaid" or something along those lines... but now we know)

so now he and melissa are in the room together, trying to recall. she says she wants to believe (!!!), and he’s rubbing her hand, but ephesian comes in, saying it’s time to leave. so she rips the photo in half and leaves crying. 

does he know he was supposed to love her? is he mourning that he hasn't? is he wondering if he has time to?

mulder gets up, and leans his head against the wall. scully comes in to say that they are still searching for more bunkers as the temple people return to their home. there is a deep sense of grief.

ephesian seems suspicious. 

mulder is talking to skinner, saying that those in the temple believe that the FBI are the devil’s army, prophesied to be defeated by the armies of god. but ephesian must not really believe that, because he hid the weapons. mulder emphasizes that he may “deny himself”.

back at the compound, all the members are being called to worship. the music is getting scary, and guns are being pulled out. 

scully looks up some bible verses and realizes that ephesian is calling his members to the end of times, which gives skinner the go ahead to launch a raid.

back at the compound, the poison is being distributed to the members of the temple. and a few are shooting at the agents outside, and mulder and scully pull up as the sipping of the poison begins inside. 

NO! mulder puts his hands up and begins to walk into the compound!!!!! WHAT IS HE DOING!!! scully shouts out that he is dead. as we see inside there are piles and piles of bodies, including melissa.

but wait! is she still alive???? she’s getting up!!! 

but no! ephesian is still there watching her. giving her poison to take. mulder is running in as fast as he can, trying to figure out what is going on. and he finds the room full of the bodies while gregorian chanting is in the background. 

he finds melissa, with no pulse, holding onto the photo she had torn. 

scully sees him touching her arm, raising his eyes and crying. 

we end where we began, with him in the field, holding the pictures of his and melissa’s past lives. 

end episode. 

what…..

first thoughts: i don’t quite know what to make of this, but i can tell it is going to tear me apart for the rest of my life.

second and third thoughts are also variations of my first thought.

i feel so sad? to know that mulder has (or thinks he has) lived these horrific past lives, and that he is reunited with the same people over and over again, to learn and lose them. and that scully was there with all of them- but so was melissa, and he said that soulmates are eternal, so if that is true he lost his for this life. and he said he was so tired, so tired... how can he escape the eternal cycle of samsara?

and scully, watching all of this- what did she mean when she said that he wasn't responsible for anything but himself? was it an insult? was she begging him? what was she feeling when she heard him talk about her being there in his past? was she trying to hurt him in their conversation in the car? will they ever actually be able to see eye to eye? does she believe him? can she? how does hearing all of this shake her own faith?

can you have many soulmates that come with you again and again, just in different forms? so would his soulmates be scully, and his mother and father and sister, and this melissa figure? and what are the implications of losing a soulmate in this world? is that a life of feeling that something is missing, until death? do they shuffle roles, but come again and again? is that comforting or horrific? are we to believe him?

and that terrible, terrible ending, him finding the bodies... how are we supposed to interpret that? just more grief on top of already endless grief? or are we supposed to see the poetry moment as an answer to a question that provides relief, even if it is bittersweet?

why did he want to know so badly? was he driven by duty to save? duty to find the Truth? duty to protect his loved ones and seek cosmic answers? are these separate things, or are they all intertwined in him?

i'm... really going to have to think this one over. i would really appreciate hearing your thoughts, as well. i wish i had a solid interpretation. it was very serious and sad, and it was bittersweet but filled with grief. i once again echo my earlier request for fluff. but how do you go back to the way things were once he says she was with him in every life? how does scully rationalize that? what are they to each other?

i'm pondering. it feels like something has shifted. and you can't go back now, even if i can't pinpoint what it is that changed.

i want to go back to daydreaming about apple cider dates. but it feels like you can't, you know? huh.

[xxplastic-cubexx]

Honestly your tags are so fun to read every time, i'm almost more excited for them than the actual post (but not entirely because your art is SO GOOD!!!! i adore it). If you don't mind me asking, what are you studying?

i am studying psychology because i refuse to see a therapist so ill figure out whats wrong with me myself !!!!!!!

[james-stark-the-writer]

was just rewatching Jack Saint and Patricia Taxxon's video on Mauler (it's called "Long Critique Is Not Deep Critique" and it's like actually so fucking good) and was so taken aback by hearing Twin Peaks music in there now that i've actually seen Twin Peaks lmao, that Laura Palmer theme is so fucking good, Angelo Badlamenti is just truly on another level, i already wanna rewatch the show now (S02 is good, y'all are just cowards).

[boba-beom]

are we just finding out that soobin’s got mirrors on his bedroom ceiling or is it just me 🫠😵‍💫 bc are you thinking what I’m thinking 🫠

soobin hard thoughts

soobin eating you out OR soobin getting head and recording the ceiling pov

soobin invites your over to hang out because he knows just how fascinated you get over his mirrored ceiling. you both sit on his bed, and you go from talking, to being a little touchy with one another, and eventually start making out.

he ends up lightly pushing you so you’re laying down, head against the pillows and his body resting between your legs. you look up at the ceiling and you watch the way he descends down your body. his face buried in your neck to kiss you at every single sweet spot he knows, lifting your top to trail kisses between the mounds of your boobs.

your eyes never leave your reflections on the ceiling. he takes his time suckling on your nipples, kissing around your tits until he decides to trail even lower down your abdomen. he discards your lower garments, leaving you bare in front of him and your reflections.

“wanna feel good sweetheart?” is all he says before you let out an airy ‘yes’.

in your reflection your eyes focus on the back of his head, the way he settles between your thighs, kissing and licking small areas here and there before planting wet kisses along your slit up to your clit. once he starts eating you out with so much dedication and attention to your body reacting to his movements, he puts your legs over his shoulders. the view of your legs splayed on his back with the back of your heel digging between his shoulder blades.

“keep your eyes on the ceiling. I want you to watch yourself while I make you cum.”

OR

soobin lures you further onto the bed by making out with you, both your hands wandering until he grabs ahold of yours and places it on top of his bulge. you start palming him through his thin pyjama bottoms, knowing he isn’t wearing underwear underneath as your fingers feel a couple of veins on his shaft.

“want my cock in your mouth, sweetheart?” and you nod, wanting nothing more than that right now.

his eyes literally light up when you situate yourself between his legs, laying on your stomach and pulling his flimsy pj bottoms down.

you waste no time and start sucking on the head of his dick, eliciting soft moans out of him all while he takes his phone out and records both your reflections. the movement of your head bopping up and down his shaft through his camera has him twitching in your mouth.

you keep taking him further and deeper until he’s essentially throat fucking you, yet he doesn’t hold back his whine and moans. just know when you both rewatch the video all you can hear are his soft ‘hah- oh yes, yes baby. mmm yes like that. fuck, i wanna cum in your mouth, be good and swallow, yeah?’

and he does, his abdomen twitching as he spurts his last few droplets in your mouth and pans the camera to you showing him his load pooling on your tongue before swallowing it with an innocent smile at the end.

[princessbrunette]

Rewatching season one and thinking about the scene where Wheezie walks in and Rafe quickly flips over his innapropriate magazine out of respect. Imagine him doing the same for deer!reader but because he doesn’t want to taint her innocence

waaaait why are you kind of a genius 🙂‍↕️ i see this as neighbour!rafe with deer!reader and it’s not because he doesn’t wanna taint her innocence, it’s kind of just a knee jerk reaction because he doesn’t want the hot neighbour to see his porn magazines 😒

you come skipping over, rafe barely noticing until you’re virtually right infront of him due to the marijuana clouding his brain. his hand shoots out, flipping the magazines before running a bashful hand through his floppy hair.

“wha’s that?” you hum before you even get to greet him.

“dont worry, alright - why’re you over here anyway?” he drawls, inwardly wondering why his first reaction was to be rude to you. perhaps he’s simply irritated that he got caught.

“was looking for my parents because they’re not home. thought they might be here.” you shrug one shoulder, and he nods slowly, taking a huff from his bong. you stare over the porch, looking into the distance to see if you could see them, or anyone for that matter — as you weren’t so keen on being caught with rafe whilst he’s smoking weed. it didn’t really go with your image.

“y’want some? or….” he coughs, and you turn to blink at him.

“oh, um…” you swallow, overthinking the whole thing. you knew you’d sound deathly uncool. “i don’t smoke.”

rafe wets his lips, nodding exaggeratedly as if to silently say ‘of course.’ before putting it aside. “yeah, uh… good. shits bad for you. you— you know drugs in general just fuck everything up. they ruin lives, man they — they just take everything…i mean, shit.” he rants, growing increasingly more irritated with seemingly no one by the second. at the end of his mini rage, he slams his fist into the soft arm of the porch seat he reclines on, making you widen your eyes slightly.

“yes… that’s what they told us during the anti drug assemblies at school.” you converse, awkwardly wiping your hands down the sides of your plaid dress. you knew rafe enough now to not be so deathly shy, but that didn’t rid you of your social anxiety.

“hah…yeah. shit, i forget we went to the same school. i probably walked right by you, huh.” he calms almost immediately, in the stereotypical unpredictable rafe cameron way. he did walk right past you. many times. you nod, saying nothing at all as to not give yourself away before craning to look behind you at your exit.

“okay. well… if my parents aren’t here i should head home. they’ll probably be there soon anyway.” you glance at your shoes as rafe stands, nodding casually.

“yeah…yeah.”

you go to walk down the porch steps, but stop— feeling a wave of bravery, and turn to look at him over your shoulder, adjusting the tote bag that hangs from it. “oh… and you shouldn’t read those pornographic magazines. they’re objectifying and damaging to women.” you try to hold your chin high, but feel your face get hot. he leans against the porch balcony, seemingly unbothered as you continue walking away.

“yeah well the women in these magazines are gettin’ paid a shit tonne of money so i wouldn’t worry ‘bout them alright?” he calls out carelessly as you disappear away further, before turning his back and sighing, hand coming up to scratch the back of his neck. “shhhit.” he whispers, to no one but himself.

[tinystarbites]

accidents pt. 1.5 | Spencer Reid x Reader

Okay so, WOW. I am completely blown away by the response to my first fic on here, 120 followers in 6 days are you guys okay? Because I am definitely not :,). While accidents pt. II isnt quite finished just yet (thank you so much for being so patient with me<3 uni is kicking my ass already rip), I thought I'd give you all a small sneak peek, aka the first 800-ish words of the second part. I hope you enjoy and thank you all so so much for the generous feedback so far!! <333 I'll go rewatch my genetics lecture now yippie :,,,,)

here you can read the entire first part, please head the warnings! Same ones apply here. also, if you wanna get tagged in pt. II, let me know in the comments!

⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂ ⠂⠄⠄⠂☆

Spencer’s never sprung from his bed faster in his life before.

His heart is a jackhammer in his chest, chipping away at his ribs one bone splitter at a time because-

It’s you. In front of his door. And Spencer is so hard it hurts but- he can’t just-

“Spencer?”

He sucks in a haggard breath, hands reaching up and messing up his hair even more. His thoughts are everywhere and nowhere at once and he just needs to- needs just a moment to-

“Uh, yeah, just a second!”, he calls back, voice scratchy and used from the- the moaning Jesus Christ because he was about to come with your mental image and he somehow, magically, managed to apparently conjure you up in front of his door with his pathetic pining and oh god-

He has to- ugh- has to wash his hands and make it go away and –

“Okay, I’ll just…chill with that weird plant here.”

An overwhelmed whimper slips past his lips and he just, stands there for at least another five seconds before something in his mind snaps back into place and he rushes to the small, adjacent bathroom of his room.

After he thoroughly washed his hands, his erection has flagged off enough so that it’s not the first thing greeting you when he opens the door and thank god for that.

And oh- seeing you after doing that actually knocks the wind out of his lungs because you are just so goddamn lovely it makes Spencer want to do stupid, stupid things like cry or kiss you or spontaneously combust into a million pieces.

For once, he does something okay-ishly sensible though.

“Hi.”

You look at him, one eyebrow raised in amusement or scepticism, he doesn’t know for sure. Your eyes hold mirthful sparkles in them when he finally manages to meet your gaze, so he settles for the former of the two options.

You’re not wearing your work clothes anymore. Rather, you went for a cozy looking, oversized sweater and funkily patterned leggings. Your fashion sense outside of work always reminded Spencer of Penelope’s.

“Hi to yourself”, you chuckle, “Can I come in or are you too busy reading ten books at once?”

Spencer feels himself flush under your gentle teasing.

“Only seven books. But, yes, of course you can come in.”

He turns out of the way, creating room for you to pass him into his room. As soon as you are inside, you don’t hesitate to jump onto his bed and flop on your back with your arms spread wide.

Spencer’s breath hitches and he has to do some very extensive mental gymnastics to supress all the inappropriate thoughts from escaping the box he banished them into. Controlling his body’s response to seeing you in the same bed he was just jacking off in is… a different story. He pulls down the hem of his shirt as discreetly as possible, as he takes a seat next to you. Making sure that there is not too much distance between you two as to raise any suspicion and make it obvious he’s trying to get some distance between you, but also enough space so that he isn’t enticed to do anything unwise. Like, reach out and feel your warmth underneath his fingers. Or the softness of your skin. Or anything else really.

The more seconds tick by in which neither of you say anything, the more nervous Spencer becomes. He starts fiddling around with his fingers, aborting more than one move to steal a glance at your face to see what you’re thinking.

“Spencer”, you then finally say, voice kind of pout-y and if that didn’t make Spencer whip his head around to face you, the next thing you say for sure does. “Do you hate me?”

“Wha-“, he sputters your name, “No- no! Of course, I don’t- whe- why would you think that?”

You let out an exasperated groan, moving around until you are lying on your side, head propped up on your arm and frowning up at him. “Because you’ve been acting hella weird these last few days and you won’t tell me whyyyy”, you drag out the last syllable, pout on your lips and Spencer has to look up at the ceiling or else he’s just going to confess everything without second thought and that will definitely not happen.

“I haven’t been acting weird, really, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

You remain silent again and Spencer feels the judging glare you send his way without having to look at you. Yes, he has been acting weird, he knows that, but you can never ever know the reason why tha-

“Is it because you saw my nudes?”

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oh spencer, you weren't quite as subtle as you thought. rip my boy. also whooops another cliffhanger? haha my fingers must've slipped my bad

tags: @sebastiansstanswhore @xx-spooky-little-vampire-xx

[fae-of-prey]

sugar plums ⏾ ˖ ࣪⊹

inspired by this + me rewatching obx before the new season

warnings: barry’s little sister reader (kinda naïve + v sheltered); w*rd cameron; brief mentions of murder as per canon events of the show; forced kiss but reader doesn’t mind; i think that’s it? feel free to lmk if i missed any *1138 words* notes: this is v much baby’s first official fic so pls be nice to me:3 i also wanna thank my beautiful beautiful moots for supporting me + beta reading this for me, love y’all to death<333

rafe loves nighttime; it’s peaceful, quiet, it feels like he has the whole world to himself, and most of all you. he fights hard to keep you as blissfully ignorant and unaware as humanly possible, so you can sleep peacefully next to him. rafe can’t sleep tonight though, how could he? he’s haunted by the consequences of his own murderous actions. he lays awake watching you instead just to feel a tinge of pride from how well he’s kept you safe and happy despite everything.

rafe always thought you were an angel, his angel, sent straight from the heavens just for him, and you‘ve never looked more heavenly at peace than you do now.

you’ve certainly come a long way from a drug dealer's little trailer park princess sister, busting your ass working at the country club hoping you’ll eventually save up enough to afford college someday, to spending your days living the kook life at tannyhill and being spoiled absolutely rotten.

although your big brother was apprehensive at first to your courtship with the kook king himself given the fact that he knows rafe, he eventually came around to the idea; he even lets you live with rafe now for the most part, i mean you get to live in a mansion more comfortably than he’s ever been able to provide, so he had to be a little selfless. barry’s always been a little overprotective and very strict with you to keep you safe from the dangers of his lifestyle, but now so is rafe and he’s happy to be responsible enough to keep you out of trouble.

on the surface it seems like the most dangerous place you could be (well, right next to the dingy trailer of your drug dealer brother), but rafe promised your brother you’d be in good hands, a promise he fully intends to keep even if those hands are now covered in blood. all so you can sleep soundly in his arms dreaming of sugar plums, while rafe’s father pulls into the driveway with a dead body in the trunk.

‘rafe’ even just his whisper startles his son and causes you to stir a little bit when he jumps, though he quickly rubs your arm with his thumb soothingly as he turns just slightly to face his father, careful not to wake you in the process ‘what? what is it?’ so eager to help, yet there’s a small part of him deep down dreading leaving the comfort of your presence for what he’s sure can’t be anything good. but ‘i need your help’ is still enough temptation from the devil for him to get out of bed and smear a kiss to your hairline before following his father out to the driveway ready to do anything for daddy’s approval.

sometime in the middle of rafe carrying gavin’s body to the druthers, you stir from your slumber, searching for rafe in the covers only to come up empty, prompting you to open your eyes in hopes you’ll have more luck with your sight, but he’s still nowhere to be found. you creep into the hallway ‘rafe?’ nothing but an echoing sense of unease. not just at rafe’s absence, but the feeling of trepidation in such a large house; you’re still not quite used to it from growing up in a tiny trailer (because despite rafe’s efforts, you’re still not quite a real kook just yet, and other kooks don’t shy away from making it known behind rafe’s back). that and you can’t help the nagging sense that something is wrong.

you go downstairs for some water while you wait for rafe to come back from accessorizing a murder wherever he is. and as soon as you’ve finished filling your cup you turn around to see your boyfriend walking in suddenly scaring the hell out of you, you didn’t even hear him come in ‘hey baby, what’re you doin up?’ his voice still so raspy ‘i woke up without you, where’d you go?’ you pout, setting the glass down to wrap your arms around him but you still look up at him with those big doe eyes, and he can’t help but feel a familiar pitter patter in his heart at your clinginess; he quite literally just buried a body but less than a minute with you sends him right back to cloud 9 because fuck you’re the light of his goddamn life, and more than that you’re the only light in his goddamn life ‘just uh, had to help my dad with som‘in on the boat, nothin fancy. let’s getcha back to bed, yeah?’ you smile and nod before taking your water with you as he leads you back upstairs.

once you’re all settled in again, so does grim reality when rafe remembers he still has to find the gun in the drain ‘shit, i’m sorry baby, i gotta go take care of somethin else’ ‘what? more boat stuff?’ you’re joking but still he’s never been more grateful for your lack of knowledge on boats before ‘yeah, yeah, uh, i’ll be back soon as i can though okay?’ ‘okay’ you’re pouting again ‘aw c’mon don’t give me fuckin that look’ he starts rummaging around in his closet for some real clothes to wear just to avoid it ‘what look?’ you feign innocence ‘those fuckin bambi eyes you give me whenever you want somethin’ ‘i dunno whatchu mean’ ‘yeah sure you don’t, fuckin smartass’ you giggle at his grumbles, he comes back dressed for the day since it’s morning now and he still has to go find a murder weapon after all.

‘cmere gimme a kiss fore i go’ ‘promise not to be gone long?’ you look up at him with those big doey eyes once again, you need to make him promise so you can sleep easy knowing he’ll be there when you wake up again, but rafe just sighs ‘ion know how long this is gonna take baby, i said i’ll be back as soon as i can, can’t make any promises okay?’ you’re still just pouting at him so he rolls his eyes and grabs your face, squishing your cheeks, and kisses you himself, grumbling about how he has to do everything himself ‘just go back to sleep and i’ll see you later aight? promise’ ‘okay’ you huff in defeat ‘good girl, i love you’ ‘i love you too’ when you kiss him once more he has to refrain from kissing you again or else he’ll never leave the damn house.

eventually he manages to leave you and rides off on his motorcycle while you watch from the window. after he’s gone you flop back into bed sighing, maybe you can at least dream of him to keep you company while he’s out wondering how the hell he’s gonna explain this to your brother.

thank you for reading! if you enjoyed, likes / comments / reblogs of any support or feedback is the best way to show your appreciation, either way i’m so happy to have you here; i feel like there’s more i can explore with this so i’m down to write more of it if you guys want; but other than that i hope you have a lovely night, muah!

© FAE-OF-PREY 2024

[reidssluttywaist]

Spencer's lap.

In which you grind against your boyfriend.

fem!reader, season 2 Spencer, +16.

tags: dry humping, a little bit of dirtytalk.

a/n: guys this is so bad I've never written smut before but i had this idea while rewatching season 2 and tried something, this must have a bunch of mistakes and it's not proofread at all, also if anyone wants to rewrite this better please message me lol.

You never thought you'd have to sit for a physics class ever again since you left high school, and here you are, a half hour into your boyfriend explaining very throughly to you how he can make a rocket with 'physics magic', he also made you swear you would never tell his tricks to anybody, 'cause a magician never shares his secrets, right?!

Except you didn't get sleepy like you did in high school, you never paid that much attention to physics since now, the way Spencer's smile explains every detail, the giggle he lets out as he rumbles about different facts of all the physics laws, you're amazed by how happy he is, how his brain is extraordinary.

Hearing his humbles is better than any music you could think of, and paired with the soft sound of the rain falling outside Spencer's place, you feel so cozy and safe.

You and Spencer have been together for a couple of months now, he is your first real boyfriend, both of you are inexperienced in every single part of being in a relationship, sometimes the feeling of love you feel towards him overwhelms you, almost leaving you out of breath, you can't believe how good it is to love somebody, how god it is to love Spencer.

"Wow, that one might be your best! Look how high it went" you said after his most recent "rocket" made its way to the ceiling, Spencer smiling so big and laughing, making you laugh as well.

"Did you see that? I think I've perfected my measurements it's so high!!" Spencer says with a high-pitched voice, too excited to contain himself.

"The only bad thing about this is that you have to clean this mess up" You make a sad face, looking at the place that has little bits of water splashed all over.

"Nah, it's fine! It'll dry out soon enough" he says pretending that he doesn't care about the mess, except he does.

"C'mon, I'll help you clean and make us some dinner after, ok?!" You get up from your side of the couch, and hold Spencer's hand, trying to pull him up.

"I don't wanna get up now, it can wait," He says seriously, you can almost believe him.

You try pushing him up again, but this time he pulls you against him, being more successful than you do you end up falling onto him, sitting on his lap facing him.

"I said it can wait, I can clean up later, ok? I wanna spend some time with you now." He said holding your waist and looking at you.

You've never been on his lap before, you guys make out now and then, but never in that suggestive of a position, and Spencer never makes the first move like that, you feel your stomach filling with butterflies.

"You look so good with your glasses on" You blurt it out looking at him, analyzing his face as he looks at you.

"Can I kiss you?" Spencer says, you don't need words to respond as you press your lips onto his, starting a gentle kiss.

You'll never get accustomed to kissing Spencer, his soft lips, he's so gentle almost like he's afraid you'll run away if he makes any sudden moves, little does he know you won't, you'd never run away from him you feel like you could never get enough from him.

The kiss was now way more intense, your tongue exploring his, his grip on your waist a lot tighter now, one of his hands let go of your waist and made its way to the back of your neck, making you let out a soft moan into Spencer's mouth, making his body shiver under you.

Your hips start slightly moving over Spencer's thigh, the light friction making you want more.

Spencer was breathing heavily, and you could also feel him growing against your leg, he pulled you harder against him, adjusting your cunt to be right on top of his cock, applying pressure to your hips, you moan again, and you could feel yourself get wetter by the second.

"Spence, wanna feel you." You say in between kisses, making him whimper and push you harder against him.

"Fuck" he swears under his breath, both of his hands going to the waistband of the sweatpants you were wearing. "That okay?" he asks.

"Yes, please." You've never agreed to something so fast in your life, helping him take your pants away, after a few seconds of struggling you were back to kissing him like your life depended on it.

"C-can I take yours?" you whisper, almost scared to say it, he agrees by guiding your hand to his waistband, also helping you take his pants now, you were both only with underwear now, not even bothering to take your tops off, you went back to humping him, your thin underwear fabric soaked.

Spencer's shaky hands made their way onto your shirt, both of them massing your breasts, making noises come out of your mouth and the man under you groan.

"N-need more, Spence." You say grinding your hips harder against him, and bring your hands to his underwear pushing it down just enough so his cock is free.

You start to use your hands on him, slow up and down movements just enough so he can't even keep his eyes open.

"Want your pussy, please, wanna feel you" Spencer mumbles taking your hands off his cock, his hand going to your panties and ripping them out.

That made you gasp, making your pussy even more wet.

Spencer positioned you on his cock, which was resting on his stomach, you started moving your hips up and down, both of you moaning even louder now.

"You feel so warm, baby, you're so wet for me," He says, looking at where your bodies are rubbing against each other, he looks mesmerized by this sight, mouth slightly opened as he applies more pressure to your hips, making you shiver.

Spencer never dirty talked like that before, you could see the blush on his cheeks as he did, this new side of him making your mind blurry and a not start to form on your stomach.

"I'm so close," he says, biting his lips as you try to move even harder for him.

"N-eed more, please, your fingers," you say and he immediately knows what you mean, taking one of his hands out of your hips and bringing it to your pussy, his thumb finding your clit with ease, start moving it in circles making you let out a loud moan.

"Fuck" You let out, not able to keep your eyes open.

"Can you cum for me? Please baby wanna see your pretty face as you fuck yourself on me." Spencer says, that added with his movements in your clit make your mind fuzzy, you felt the heat on your stomach spread to your legs and your body starts to shake, releasing all the tension you were feeling.

"Oh, you're so pretty like that, so pretty when you cum for me," Spencer says, helping you ride out your climax, you were so sensitive by the recent orgasms but you started to move your hips harder and faster on Spencer's cock.

He bites his lips and you feel him grip your ass, his glasses were blurry and it was so hot that he didn't take him out.

He groaned when you felt his dick twit under you, you helped him through his orgasm, kissing him when you were both done, his hands when to your back caressing it, slowly moving up and down.

"That was so good" He whispers to you.

"A dirty talker, huh?! Who would've thought?" you joke, making him laugh.

"Most men are dirty talkers so it's not that uncommon" he rumbles.

He switched up to nerdy Spencer again, making you smile.

You spend a couple more minutes just talking before getting up, you make sure to point all that he must buy you a new pair of panties to pay for the one he ripped, he agrees, saying he would buy more than one because "you'll never know what might happen, right?"

[avaf00rd]

Behind the scenes

Leah Williamson x matildas!reader

Tiny little blurb I wrote last minute as I rewatched the show

“Hello you” you grinned as you opened the front door, a smiley Leah behind it with her large suitcase and England hoodie on. The Disney plus camera crew behind you. Pretending as if Leah had just gotten home from England camp and you hadn’t seen her yet. Well she had, about an hour ago though.

You grabbed the suitcase from her hand, and pulled her in from her other free wrist, placing a short kiss on her lips and hugging her tight. “How was it?” You asked excitedly whilst you both made your way to your living room.

“Yeah really good, great to see everyone” your girlfriend explained to you leaning against the large book case near your couch. “Plane was quicker than I thought though, only like an hour and a half”

The camera still following both of you “oh yeah wow that’s not bad at all”

“Suppose I had it a bit better than you travel wise” she chuckled, folding her arms now. Nothing to your 20 hours of travel to and from Australia for your own international camp.

“Certainly” you laughed back with Leah.

“Ladies that was actually really great for a first take so we probably won’t need to do that again. We’ll now just get you both on the couch so we can talk to you both” one of the members of the camera said, holding a clip board and directing his crew to your living room

Leah sat down on the shared couch with you following suit behind. Plopping down next to your girlfriend as she put an arm around you, legs intertwined at the end of the couch.

“You guys wanna stay like this for the clips?-“

“Yes” you nodded fast, as people in the room laughed at your certainty.

“Leah can you tell me a bit about y/n. Like how she is as a person but also a teammate?” The same man asked from behind the camera. They would get her answers and these shots for the docu-series.

It be out on Disney plus just months before the World Cup begins, to help Australia get more of an insight into their team and the players

Leah looked down at you, as you shot her a smile before she started “y/n is such a hard worker. I’ve never met anyone like her. Very funny person to have a laugh with…or laugh at” she nodded

You rolled your eyes “saw that coming”

Leah did one of her wide smiles where her cheeks would go so high and her nose would scrunch up which made you melt completely, “so leading onto that she’s a bit clumsy”

“Not all the time” you mumbled

“Everyone at Arsenal calls her the princess though. Because she’s just the sweetheart of the team, who cares about her team so so much and we get to see that every day here in London” you smiled to yourself as you looked down at the couch while Leah spoke about you to the cameras

“Do you just completely hate this?” Leah laughed

“No keep going” you nodded, making her laugh. Leah often got the sense you got all flustered and embarrassed when she spoke about you so well, to other people when you are in the room.

“Y/n what’s it like getting to train each day and play games with your partner?” The producer asked me

“Yeah I’m extremely blessed, I would say, to be able to basically spend every hour of the day with her. And to put on the Arsenal badge and play for our fans with my favourite person is a bit of a win each weekend for me”

“We’re assuming you two meet through Arsenal?” He asked

“Yeah we met at Arsenal when I transferred back in 2019. And then I went on loan to Barca for a season, but then…yeah I came back-“

“And then y/n asked me out!” Leah cut you off with a grin

“Um okay it was kind of you” you looked up at her with a shake of your head.

“Kinda both of us in a way?” Leah shrugged to camera. Which you just shook your head, to said camera.

“They aren’t gonna understand that” you pointed with both arms to the camera, you and Leah now giggling. You both said a few more things they had asked you before the filming stopped.

“Thanks girls! We will see you tomorrow afternoon for more shots, have a great night, hope we didn’t take up too much of your time” a different lady had said now, as she helped her crew pack up some small equipment.

“Not at all!”

————————————————————————

Being one of the few people in your Matilda’s squad who had been apart of the team for over 11 years, you had been in quite a few scenes in the docu-series. Alongside Steph Catley, Sam Kerr, Caitlin Foord, and more. You got the opportunity to talk about your family’s background in the sport and growing up with the Matilda’s, as well as preparations to win the World Cup.

This morning you had done some scenes at the training centre for your club, along with Cait and Steph as you all talked about playing for Arsenal.

The cameras were with you once again, as Now Leah sat on a small picnic blanket in your local park, late afternoon, where you would often bring your dog, Denny, you were trying to get him to run with the ball at his fist like he was about to shoot.

Leah threw her head back laughing hysterically as you fell over your feet once again, tripping on your own dog, in another attempt to get him to play football. “It’s not going to work” she shouted

“He’ll do it Leah just wait!” You shouted back laughing as you kept trying. When you made it back to the picnic blanket, you did what you were asked to do by the crew which was talk about playing each other in the World Cup.

“I always say it but I really really hope both our teams make it to the final, but I don’t think I could handle versing you in a heated game like that”

“You do it all the time though. We’ve had so many heated games against each other”

“Yeah but a World Cup final though…Hopefully one of us will be out by then” Leah shrugged, looking at you from her position on the rug with her knees tucked to her chest

“Hopefully England” you shrugged back

“No I was joking. I hope both teams are” she laughed once again.

“I think the friendly coming up against England just before the World Cup should be good.” You said as Leah nodded “Most players who will be in the World Cup squad should hopefully be in there so we get a full feel of not just the other team but hopefully our own squads”

“Yeah for sure” Leah said

“I can sense you two have a small rivalry in your own house hold” someone’s behind the camera commented

“Mm I don’t know” Leah grinned as you just laughed

“You know it’s true”

———————————

I’m pretty negative about fics like these that I write. Cause I hate this. But honestly it’s due to some of the recent think about my writing my inbox🫠🫠

So please. If you’re not a fan of it, click out of it!

Luv u all

[tastesousweet]

⭒ blurb : “if a girl walks up to you …”

bf!hamzah x poc!reader

summary : headcannon/blurb based on the tiktok trend “if a girl walks up to you and flirts what are you doing?”

mickey speaks : randomly had this thought tdy & hamzah has been on my mind lately soooo this one’s for my slushy girls 💐 PRETTY FLUFFY (but i hope it’s not like … cringy instead of cute)

─────────── · · ୨୧ · · ───────────

you’re both fully in pajamas, tucked and wrapped in each other’s arms when you come across the tiktok trend that has flooded your for you page as of late

hamzah’s naturally aloof (due to a long day spent with you and it currently being almost 1 AM) and unfocused as he fights sleep while watching his tenth episode of teen titans.

so when you quickly unravel yourself from him and move across the room, adjusting your low hanging sweatpants accordingly, he’s dumbfounded and asking you what you’re doing and why you’re leaving him.

“you’re so dramatic, can you come here? i wanna do something”

“insulting me and asking a favor in the same sentence…” he sighs then pauses with a hand closed over his mouth, muffling “wow.”

literally and metaphorically tugging his arm to get him to participate but he’s adamant on knowing what exactly he’s getting up for

when he’s almost out of bed you tell him it’s “this tiktok thing” and he exaggerates a “NOOOO” and releases all of his weight so that he falls back on the bed and you practically fall with him due to your connected hands

of course he’s eventually convinced with a few kisses

hamzah fiddles with your hand while listening to you explain: “okay, pretend im not here and some girl comes up to you at target.”

he just stands in the center of the frame looking around the room as you walk away then return in character

you approach obnoxiously and begin some surface level flirting “hey good looking”

“you can back up a little bit,” he looks you up and down

“pause- did you just check her out???”

“no? you know there was definitely some judgement there.”

“sure ok, resume… now.” you play with your hair, “what’s someone as cute as you doing in a place like this?”

“bruh, we’re at a target” hamzah laughs through his words

you stop your role again, “and why are you taking time to respond to her?!”

“oh kill me for being distracted! you couldn’t have hired an ugly actress?”

you look up at him with squinted eyes, “you need to learn to resist the hot girls too!”

“i’m tryingggg!!!!” he rubs his eye harshly, “restart, restart.”

it cuts to a clip of you two acting once more

“yeah, we both loooveee target we’re, like, so alike,” you go to grab his arm and he turns completely away from you

“ok, and i have a girlfriend” he pretends to grab something off of a shelf

“that doesn’t matter if i don’t see her…”

you continue pestering so he resorts to plugging his ears with his fingers and talking over you, repeating that he has a girlfriend

eventually he turns back to face you and yells “OH MY GOD GIRL, I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND GET THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!!!!” right into your smiley face.

he then fully manhandles you over his shoulder and spins you around before dropping you onto the plushness of your shared bed

he doesn’t even look to check on you (you’re outrageously laughing and yelling “it hurts!” in regards to your poor stomach cramping)

he runs to grab your phone from the desk while recording himself in faux panic, “guys, you can’t tell y/n i just beat up a woman please, please, pl- AHHH”

he and the video are cut off by you jumping on his back and attacking his cheek with kisses through your loud giggles.

you cuddle in bed again after turning off the lights and hamzah rewatches it for a third time since you’ve posted it to your spam account (everytime it’s over he says, “no, that was actually pretty funny.”)

by the morning it has thousands of likes and plenty of comments either full of love for the two of you together or calling hamzah the funniest man in the world (they’re just like u fr!)

[ohbabydollie]

(celeb s/o anon here) but i would totally ride ted while he watched the animated barbie movies and got a bit mad because he NEEDS to do research and he WON’T be rewatching anything lmaoo

he’s absolutely bored sitting there and watching those stupid movies that don’t make any sense, he’s absolutely bored out of his mind until you walk in. you happily sit down next to him when you realize he’s watching your favorite barbie movie.

he pulls you into his lap, draping a blanket over the both of you, happily cuddling until a few movies later you realize he’s hard.

before you know it you’re slowly taking his long cock, feeling every vein and ridge inside of you as you bottom out. you try to stay focused on the movie but the way ted’s cock is hitting your g spot perfectly and just resting there, the occasional movement of his hips when he readjusts himself, his arms wrapped around your waist.

you couldn’t help yourself but just move a little, letting out a soft moan.

“bunny, stop it” he warns

“not doing anything” you mutter back, now stopping, your walls squeezing his cock from the need for friction.

so you sit there again, trying to ignore it, but it’s like ted is doing it on purpose, moving just enough to be resting his thick head on the spongy spot inside you.

he wouldn’t mind if you were just getting comfy, would he?

so you lifted your self from his cock “adjusting” yourself with a few silent moans before sitting back down at a different angle, this time ted was a little deeper.

“thought i told you to stop it”

“im just getting cozy”

“well this is your last warning, im not gonna rewatch these stupid movies because you wanna be a fucking tease” ted says grabbing your hips as you smile

“m’kay”

somehow a movie later you find yourself aching for relief, just wanting to bounce on ted’s cock, but you can’t…

well it wouldn’t do any harm if he didn’t notice

you gave an experimental movement that ted didn’t seem to notice and another until you were softly moving on his cock, but what you didn’t take in account were the soft noises coming from you

soft sighs and shaky breaths, your hip’s subconsciously moving faster until you feel a slap to your thigh

“honey, what did i say?” ted asks now stopping you, you turn to look at him innocently

“don’t remember”

he sighs, lifting you off his cock and before you can get away he slams you down, forcing a loud cry from you and feeling him angle his hips to go impossibly deeper into you.

“i’m not gonna rewatch these movies because you wanna be a fuckin tease, now sit there and keep my cock warm” he demands in a deep voice as he wraps his arms around your waist and holds you there tightly

now you have to sit patiently

[dean-winchester-is-a-warrior]

Every Fucking Time

Summary: You want to help Dean, but he knows you can't.

Warnings/Explicit 18+: Lots of angst! Smut! Unprotected PinV sex. Slightly rough sex. Dean being an asshole. Dean being a broken boy. Hurt/comfort.

Pairings: Dean x Reader (You)

Word Count: 2,737

A/N: So, I just rewatched 13x18, Bring 'Em Back Alive, and the scene at the end never fails to break my heart. I just wanna make Dean feel better! 😫 But it got me thinking about how unlikely Dean would be to accept that help, and how his anger might manifest. Anyway, this is what spilled out of my brain as a result.

A/N 2: The title is a reference to Dean's line, "Every time we get close, it all falls apart. Every frickin' time." I have changed it to the non-network TV version because we all KNOW that's actually what Dean said.

You just wanted to help. You needed to help. You needed to make it better for him. 

Dean had slipped back home through the rift barely an hour earlier, talking about the apocalypse world Charlie and how he'd left her and Ketch behind, promising he would come back with reinforcements.

Then you, Cas and Sam had given him the bad news; no one could go back, you couldn’t send reinforcements. Gabriel was gone, taking all his archangel grace with him.

“So if it’s gone, then that means that we can’t open that door again. If we can’t open the door, then I shoulda never come back!” He'd shouted.

He'd tried to tamp down the rage and anger that simmered just behind his forced calm. Nevertheless, it exploded out of him making you all jump.

“Son of a bitch!” He'd screamed, sending books and papers crashing to the ground as he swept them from the table. “Every time!”

You could feel his frustration and pain like it was your own as his voice dropped, defeated and broken for the millionth time. “Every time we get close, it always falls apart…every fuckin’ time.”

When he walked away, looking as though the weight of the world was once again on his shoulders, you’d tried to follow after him, but Sam had grabbed your arm gently, holding you back.

“Leave him for now, Y/N. He needs time.”

You should have listened to Sam, but you could feel Dean’s pain like a lance in your side and you were desperate to heal him. So less than an hour later, you went looking for him. But he wasn’t in his room, or the Dean cave. The kitchen was empty and so was the garage. 

You finally found him in the infirmary. He was sitting on one of the beds, sewing together a nasty looking bullet wound.

“Dean!” You called out worriedly as you rushed down the steps. He glanced up at you but then went back to stitching himself up. “Why didn’t you tell us you’d been shot?” You reprimanded him.

He shrugged his unwounded shoulder. “No big deal. Ketch patched me up on the go, just didn’t have time to sew it up properly.”

You watched him silently for a moment, wincing every time the needle pierced his inflamed skin. He’d taken his shirt off so he could tend to his wound, and you couldn’t help but take an inventory of his other numerous scars. Jagged knife cuts, more round bullet holes, and a few waxy looking old burns, all marred his otherwise perfect, lightly freckled torso.

Some of the scars were very faded, barely noticeable, while others were newer; some of them were still red and angry looking. They were a patchwork of pain - a tapestry of more than thirty-five years of hunting, fighting, falling, getting up, and fighting again. 

It made you exhausted just to see it; it made your bones ache.

You stepped a little closer to him, but he kept you at arm’s length with an aura of silent, repressed anger that you could practically see pulsing off of him.

You wanted to help him so badly.

“Dean, I’m so sorry.”

He shook his head, not looking up from his work. “No, let’s not. I don’t wanna talk about it.”

You let out a small sigh. Of course you don’t. You thought with a flash of frustration.

You were quiet another minute as he finished the last few stitches. Then you smiled a little, trying a different tactic. “So, there was a Charlie over there? That’s amazing. What was she like? Was she the same as our Charlie?”

Dean didn’t answer right away. He snipped the thread he was using and tossed the small silver scissors back into the first aid kit he had open on the bed beside him. He took some rubbing alcohol and poured it onto a gauze pad, holding it to his wound and sucking in a breath through gritted teeth before answering.

“Yeah sure, she was like our Charlie.” His voice was a growl of pain. “She was a badass, determined to fight injustice, sticking up for her friends, risking her life for them. And yeah, just like our Charlie, I left her on her own to be butchered.”

Tears pricked your eyes. “Dean that’s not true…you didn’t-”

“Seriously, Y/N. Just fucking don’t.”

You were silenced again, watching him clean up and toss the bloody bandages into the trash as he stood up from the bed. He reached for his flannel and tried to put it on, slightly hampered by his newly bandaged shoulder. You stepped forward to help him with it, and when it was on, but still unbuttoned, you slid your hands inside, down over his ribs.

You kissed his chest gently, and felt him twitch slightly. 

“Y/N.” He said quietly and you could hear the warning in his tone. 

You knew he was in a bad place, and the two of you had only recently begun to move your relationship out of friendship and into something more, so sex was still new between you. But you felt the overwhelming, screaming need to help him, to hold him close and let him feel your love shine through. You’d been in love with him for a long time, but you’d never told him. You suspected he didn’t love you back, though you hoped he might someday.

For now, though, you’d settle for being a soft place to land, if he’d just let you.

“Dean.” You said softly, kissing his chest again. “Let me help you.”

He pushed you back and turned away. “I don’t need help.”

You persisted, wrapping your arms around his waist from behind. “We all need help from time to time, Dean.”

“Y/N!” He said again, louder this time, his earlier anger resurfacing. “I told you, I’m fine. Just drop it.”

But you couldn’t. You wanted to help him, whether he accepted it or not.

You moved around him, so you stood in front of him again. “Dean, you’re not fine. I just wanna help you.”

Dean scoffed. “Well you can’t fucking help me, Y/N. You can’t make it better.”

“I could try.” You cupped his cheek, but he pulled it out of your grasp, turning his head. You stood on tiptoe to try and kiss him. “Let me try, Dean. Let me try to help you.”

Dean grabbed your wrists from around his neck, glaring down at you, eyes blazing. “You fucking can’t, do you not hear me? You can’t help me, no one can help me! Because all I do is fuck up; all I do is leave my friends and family to die. And fucking you isn’t gonna change that; unless you have some kind of magical cunt that can open portals to another dimension, you can’t fucking help me!”

You felt your stomach drop, and an immediate ache started, high in your gut, clenching your insides and making you feel short of breath. You stepped back from Dean and swallowed convulsively, trying not to let go of the tears that clogged your throat. But it was a losing battle and they were soon coursing down your cheeks.

You nodded slightly. “K, yeah.” You didn’t know what else to say, turning away just as remorse began dawning in Dean’s emerald eyes. “Sam was right…I shouldn’t have come.”

You took off, bounding up the stairs as Dean called out to you. You ignored him, desperate to get away before you collapsed completely. 

You heard Dean following you, chasing you down the bunker hallway and you sprinted away. You got to your room just in time to slam the door and lock it just as Dean skidded to a halt outside.

He banged on the door, but you just moved over to your desk, dropping into the chair and swiping at your tears over and over, unable to make them stop.

“Y/N, come on! Open the door. Look, I didn’t mean that, okay? I just...just let me in.” He banged again. When you wouldn’t open it, he just kept banging. Finally he yelled at you through the wood.  “You know, I can just break down the fucking door! Let me in!”

He slammed his hammer like fist against the door again, rattling it in its frame. You jumped up and ripped open the door just as he was about to start pounding again. So his fist was raised and his features were twisted in a snarl as you looked up at him. But you were calm, even though tears still leaked from your eyes.

“Enough.” You said quietly. “Look, I shouldn’t have kept bugging you, you made it very clear you didn’t want me there and that I couldn’t be of any help. So, it’s fine. I’ll leave you alone now, and you can please stop raging at me and trying to smash down my door.”

You swallowed tightly and then nodded at him. “Goodnight.”

You closed your door softly and walked back to slump onto the end of your bed. You dashed your tears away as quickly as they fell, trying to dash away Dean’s angry words too, but failing miserably. 

After nearly half an hour your tears finally dried up and you decided to get ready for bed, sadness and hurt making you slow and sluggish. As you pulled your big sleep shirt on over your head, however, a noise caught your attention just outside your door. 

You walked softly to the door in your bare feet, cracking it open an inch to look out into the hallway. What you saw made brand new tears cloud your vision.

Dean was sitting across from your door, his back against the wall. His knees were bent slightly with his elbows resting there and his feet planted on the floor. His eyes were shut, his head leaning back against the wall with tears streaming silently down his cheeks. Or almost silently. As you watched, his face spasmed with pain and his breath seemed to catch in his throat, making the muffled sound you’d heard; it sounded like his pain was choking him.

You opened the door wider and Dean sensed you, his eyes springing open. At first it seemed like he might bolt, but then he shook his head as he stared at you. “Baby, I’m so sorry.” His voice was a harsh whisper. “I swear to god, I didn’t mean to hurt you like that. I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with me.”

He thumped his head back against the wall twice. “I just break things. Everything.” He punctuated the word by slamming his elbow back into the wall as well, hard enough that you were worried he’d break the bone.

You hurried forward to kneel on the floor in front of him, squeezing in between his knees. You pulled his hands into yours as you tried to reassure him. “Dean, that isn’t true. You don’t break everything; you fix things, save things. It’s in your DNA to try to right all the wrongs in the world, but sometimes you just can’t.”

He stared at you intently and once again you found yourself desperate to try to ease the bottomless ache you could see in his mossy green eyes.

His voice was barely a whisper as he reached out to run his thumb across your cheekbone. “Did I break us?”

You took a deep breath. “Your words hurt me.” He closed his eyes and nodded. “But…”

You were quiet a moment before deciding it was worth taking a chance, so you just said it. “But I love you, and my love doesn’t break that easily, even if my heart does.”

You took his hand from your cheek and held it against your chest, over your heart. “Not ever. No matter what the future holds, my love is unbreakable, even when you try to smash it to pieces with both hands.”

Dean’s expression was closed off, and you couldn’t see through it to his thoughts. After a moment he shook his head. “Don’t love me, sweetheart. I can’t…I can’t protect you if you love me. Something will come and take you from me - use you to hurt me somehow.” He closed his eyes again and repeated his words from earlier in the evening. 

“Every time I get close, it always falls apart.” He opened his eyes slowly and stared intently into your soul. “Every fucking time.”

He gazed at you for a long time, and you let him, hoping he could see that you weren't afraid to love him, and you weren't going to be scared away.

Suddenly he reached out to yank you into his lap and slam his mouth down on yours. You gasped into the kiss and then whimpered as he clutched you tight to him.

He pulled away from you, breathing harshly. “Am I forgiven? Because I was such a liar. I do need you.” He dipped his head to nip at your pulse point and flick his tongue against your salty skin. “I need you so fucking bad.”

You nodded, flushed and aching for his touch. “You’re forgiven.”

He crushed your lips with his once again, standing up without letting you out of his arms. He pushed you backwards through your bedroom door and closed it with a soft click, as he yanked your t-shirt off over your head, getting you naked in one quick motion.

You pushed his open flannel down his arms, being careful not to aggravate his newest injury. You fumbled with the button on his jeans for a moment, hands trembling, as he palmed your breast and squeezed, pressing his hard, blunt fingertips into your yielding flesh.

You threw your head back as he pulled your nipple into his mouth and bit it gently. You sank your hands into his short hair, tugging sharply and moaning loudly. He pulled away, just far enough that he could spin you around to face the wall. With a hand against your upper back, he bent you over slightly and lifted your arms, so that you braced them against the brick.

Then he raised your right leg, wrapping his forearm over top of it and spreading you open. You felt the knuckles of his other hand brush over your dripping wet core as he unbuttoned his jeans. Seconds later, you felt his tip pressing against your entrance and then you let out a scream of pleasure as he slammed into you hard and fast.

As he fucked up into you, he pulled you open even wider, reaching down with his free hand to rub circles into your clit with his calloused fingertips.

Eventually he dropped your leg, and pushed your feet apart while he pulled your hips back towards him. He never faltered or slowed his pace, just manhandling you into the positions he wanted.

You were bent at a ninety degree angle now, hands still braced against the wall, with your head hanging between them as Dean continued to pound into you so deep that he was almost lifting you off the floor with each thrust. 

He clamped his hand on the back of your neck, using it as leverage to piston his hips forward like a jackhammer. He tilted your pelvis forward slightly and suddenly he was perfectly, relentlessly hitting your g-spot over and over until you were screaming out his name and crashing into a hard wall of pleasure. You shook with your climax, but Dean didn’t stop, riding you through your first orgasm and into several more.

Your throat was hoarse from shouts of pleasure before Dean finally cursed loudly, shouting your name and surging into your body. With one last driving push,  you could feel him spurting into you hot and thick. He rocked his body against yours a few more times as his cock continued to twitch inside you.

Finally he stilled, both of you breathing harshly now, bodies slick with sweat. He laid his chest against your back, his arm still wrapped around your waist, keeping you close, keeping himself locked inside your slick warmth.

“Y/N.” You could hear the thick emotions even in his soft whisper. “You know, you save me. Every time I think I can’t recover, every time I think I won’t get back up. You make me think I can. You tell me I will.” 

He paused and his voice was velvety and warm as he breathed out across your skin. “You save me.” He kissed your shoulder gently. “Every fucking time.”

Jensen RPF and Any/All Characters:

@lyarr24

@lacilou

@deans-spinster-witch

@globetrotter28

@suckitands33

@alwaystiredandconfused

@evznackles

@jackles010378

@impala67rollingthroughtown

@krazykelly

@candy-coated-misery0731

@envyaurora95

@spnwoman

@deans-baby-momma

@luvr4miya

@arcannaa

@viviwatchestv

@winharry

@ladysparkles78

@kr804573

Dean Fics Only:

@roonthelittlespoon920

@slamminmine

@zepskies

@safiyas-world

@aylacavebear

@waywardcheshire

Any/All Fics Regardless of Character or Fandom:

@kazsrm67

@slut-for-evans-stan

@sexyvixen7

@nancymcl

@hobby27

Everything Incl. Fan Edits:

@k-slla

@leigh70

@eevvvaa

@kickingitwithkirk

@foxyjwls007

@notinthislife50

@roseblue373

@mishkatelwarriorgoddess

@avanatural

@mrsjenniferwinchester

@all-alone-he-turns-to-stone

@deangirl96

@stoneyggirl2

[haza1ll]

animation for THE NEON VOIDD BABYYYY

this post is for @sugarpasteltmnt

‼️‼️MEGA YAPPING AHEAD PLEASE BEWARE‼️‼️

this might end up being really long and rambly and sappy but maybe not who knows.( it was) (and also featuring numerous spelling errors i am way too tired to fix and i am not re reading what i just wrote) SO. yknow how when chap idek..25(?) came out and i was all like “yeah so i made this animation for TNV and ill drop it when the fic ends” in your ask box? so. I FINISHED IT RAHHH. technically it has been finished since i sent that ask but ohhh my goodness did it need polishing. i haven’t animated in 4 years before that and omg it felt so good getting back into it but IDFK SOMETHING IS STILL NOT UP TO MY STANDARDS. i feel like i could have done so much more with it and i deffo wanted to but as soon as i told myself “oh yeah this is basically done” art block literally sucker punched me in the gut out of NOWHERE. I COULD NOT PICK UP MY I PAD. I COULD NOT DRAW. I WOULD STARE AT THE WIP ANIMATION AND BE UPSET BC I DDINT WANNA WORK ON IT AHH. that goes with saying. i kept having this thought in the back of my head “you need to finish it. you have a wip sitting. finish it. go do it. what are you doing are you STARTING ANOTHER PROJECT??? anddd yeah i got super distracted with other stuff and other projects and then i started spending my free time rewatching 2012 turtles and omg this summer has been a mess. i have all the free time in the world and i choose to be the least productive as possible with it even though i have a job that lets me literally sit on my phone and do whatever i want if no one is there. (i’ve brought my switch to work numerous times ☠️) what i was trying to get at is the fact that TNV has inspired a lot of the old me to come back and i lowk missed her. i really missed the point in all those words up there but im here now so whatever. BUT. TNV made me make a tumblr account, i got back in to animation AND digital art in general, got back into longfics that are ongoing, AND it also helped kickstart ideas for writing. i’ve got so many stories now!! you are such an inspirational person pastels i just- every time i read a new chapter of yours it made me wanna go get up and do something. i wanted to create something. because at the end of each chapter, i would think- “woah. a person out there just wrote this. they just sat down one day and committed. i wanna do that” so i did that. just huge thank you and shoutout to you pastel. like damn. idk no words from me here. just a bunch of platonic hugs and kisses and thankyouthankyouthsnkuou for this lovely heart wrenching but also sweet story. i love this fandom (tmnt) so SO much and i think it’s so awesome how interactive you are with your own personal NV fans. crazy how we’re all here because of a bunch of turtles. 

STUFF ABOUT THE ANIMATION:

okay i really like to talk and if you let me, i will run my mouth. this is the internet so im gonna do just that. so more words for you to read 😁. AHEM. so like i stated before in the genuinely scary mess of words up there, i haven’t touched animation in a while, like, 4 years a while. yes i’ve done digital art here and there along the years, i haven’t been doing it nearly as much as i need to to use some programs to their full potential. layers are still confusing, and don’t even get me started on multiply and all that jazz. shading never comes out right on digital for me, i gotta work that one out. so, for this animation, i decided to go with a very rough style. nothing needed to be perfect, i just wanted to live my little life of trying to experiment with a bunch of different things all at once in one short animatic. I wanted to do that little ball bounce thing all animation artists start with (i kinda included that with the key). i also wanted to have a go at lip sync (no hate it was my first time) and also timing the animation with the music. i wanted to see how smoothly i could move a figure in and out of and out of the screen as well, which honestly, i think that part might be my favorite. i think i did a good job, and thats what matters. the animation itself lost a bunch of quality on importing it- no clue how it happened but now the ending is grainy af. ignore that pls lol- but it was sitting in my flipaclip for god, i dont even know, 3 months now? i kept going back and forth on if i wanted to share it or not, so im throwing it to the wolves and i guess whatrver happrns happens and im good with that. yay. im actually rrwlly tired now sooo *leaves this absolute pile of words with a video attached at your feet and stumbles away quickly*

also i’ve genuinely never posted anything so i’m learning how to use tumblr too ☠️

[stars444hearts]

big reputation || 2

caitlin clark x actress! reader masterlist - prev - next warnings: none

caitlin_clark22

Liked by kate_martin03, yn_ln, and 820,508 others

caitlin_clark22 by the grace of whatever’s up there 🙏🙏🙏 Tagged: kate_martin03

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kate_martin03 caption’s tuff →caitlin_clark22 enough. 

user1 WAIT IS IT A NOD TO Y/N’S TWEET →user2 its def not they don’t even know each other →user3 NO Y/N LIKED THE POST

—

Y/n smiled as she read through Caitlin’s comments. After the eye-opening conversation she had with Kate last night, Y/n had become more open to the idea. 

She also thought the caption was cute. 

Y/n groaned as her stomach grumbled. She placed her phone on her bed, stood up, cracked her spine, and walked into her kitchen. 

Y/n decided to make something easy, then sit on her couch and binge-watch crappy reality tv. This was her first week off in months and she would spend it rotting in her living room like every normal 21-year-old. 

Y/n couldn’t tell you the number of below-deck episodes she had binge-watched, but by the time she finished, the sun was down and the crickets were chirping. She begrudgingly stalked back to her bedroom, changing into her pajamas and throwing herself down on her bed. 

She picked up her phone, only to drop it a second later in shock. 

[yn_ln]  Caitlin Clark                            4h ago sent you a message

—

Caitlin, on the other hand, was freaking out. She had never even spoken to Y/n before, but Kate had convinced her to DM her. 

Caitlin probably typed and retyped her DM 50 times before settling on a ‘hey !’

Caitlin groaned and shoved her phone down after finally hitting send. She couldn’t help but picking up her phone every ten seconds to see if Y/n had opened or responded to her DM. 

After 10 minutes, Caitlin had eventually given up hope of a response and sighed, turning off her phone and putting her head in her hands. 

Caitlin buisied herself by ordering doordash and sitting on her couch, rewatching film her coaches gave her to look over. She lost track of time and found herself mindlessly picking at her fingers, only coming to when she realized it was past midnight. ]

She groaned as she stood up from the couch, attempting to rub the sleep from her eyes. Caitlin walked into her bedroom as she sat on her bed. She picked up her phone and almost threw it when she saw her most recent notification. 

[caitlin_clark22] Yn Ln                            20m ago sent you a message

— 

Caitlin  hey !

Y/n hey yourself sorry for leaving you on delivered i was binge-watching below deck

Caitlin which one?

Y/n mediterranean, duh

Caitlin good. That's the best one Yn liked this message

Y/n so, i’m assuming kate told  you to dm me?

Caitlin well, to be honest, i had kinda been wanting to ever since i met you on facetime with kate. 

Y/n brother that was 6 months ago 💀

Caitlin LEAVE ME ALONE, OK i'm just a girl

Y/n SO REAL whenever people tell me im doing  something wrong i get so annoyed  like im just a girl that curb shouldn’t have been there 😠

Caitlin LMFAOO Anyways, yeah, kate finally bullied me into texting my celebrity crush who she just  happens to be best friends with

Y/n 🤨🤨 is that all i am to you?? a pretty face?

Caitlin NO NO I DIDN’T MEAN IT LIKE THAT I SWEAR

Y/n LMFAOO im just fucking with you anyways, going back to that… celebrity crush, you say? 🤨😏

Caitlin 😶 moving on…

Y/n no, no i wanna know

Caitlin umm… basically i’ve just been really obsessed with your show lately and kate told me i should shoot my shot but im now realizing maybe i should save that for the court

Y/n LMFAOO nah, kate was right she showed you my tweet, right?

Caitlin yeah, why?

Y/n because i wasn’t kidding. 

[maximoffcarter]

Take a chance on me.

Pairings: Emily Prentiss x reader.

Summary: To say that Emily was baffled that she first had control over the situation with the UnSub and suddenly being hostage and getting shot again, was an understatement. But what she didn't expect was that she'd meet someone.

A/n: This was requested by anon, I was going to follow Emily's thingy with Mendoza but decided to change it a bit and make it in my own image🫢 Also, I didn't want to have to rewatch those episodes cause I kinda like to think they didn't happen🙂‍↔️ I also did not proof read this, I never do until it's too late haha, so my apologies. I'm working on everyone's request, I'm slowly getting back to writing again cause I miss it so much, and I've been so busy. Hope you guys enjoy this, leave comments, hearts, whatever you like and reblog so this gets some love🫶🏻

*not my gif*

To say that Emily was baffled that she first had control over the situation with the UnSub and suddenly being hostage and getting shot again, was an understatement. After two days of dealing with this case, it seemed like they had it all figured out and under control, but of course, things don’t always go as planned or expected, and now here she was in a hospital bed, waiting for her procedure to get the bullet out because, apparently, it was dangerous to keep the bullet inside and she had to go through surgery to get it out. The team had already made its round to check on her and had promised that they’d be back once Emily was out, she didn’t see the need for them to stay when they had paperwork to do, and they could just go home. She groaned softly as she laid her head back against the pillow and closed her eyes for a moment, sooner or later the nurse would come to take her to the OR, and she’d be out for a while. Soon enough, she felt the presence of someone, she opened her eyes and was about to make a comment about being fine when her eyes landed on the agent that had saved her life. The agent she had spent the last two days working with, and that somehow, had taken her breath away.

“Carter…what…what are you doing here?” Emily offered a small smile, trying to hide the faint blush on her cheeks as she noticed the flowers that the agent was holding.

Y/n huffed a chuckle as she walked into the room, placing the flowers on the table in front of the bed. “I uh…I wanted to check on you. I heard they’ll have to take you to surgery.”

Emily scoffed. “Yeah, well, apparently I can’t keep it in, and they convinced me of the surgery to save me from pain.” She shrugged.

Y/n chuckled softly as she nodded. “Yeah, great choice.” She smiled softly as she tilted her head, staring at Emily. “I’m just glad you’re okay.”

“Well, you saved me. So, I gotta thank you for that.” Emily smiled softly as she stared at her. “And…thanks for the flowers.”

Y/n looked at them and chuckled nervously. “Yeah, well, they were out of ‘get well’ balloons. And I thought these flowers were pretty.” She smiled softly and returned her stare at Emily. “And you really don’t have to thank me.”

Emily nodded as she huffed a chuckle. “Well, I still wanna thank you. Not everyone would risk their life for a stranger.”

Y/n hummed as she squinted her eyes. “Isn’t that our job, though? Risking our lives for strangers?” She grinned softly.

Emily rolled her eyes playfully and grinned. “You know what I mean, and if you don’t, then maybe it’s your problem or maybe me not thinking because of the painkillers.”

Y/n laughed softly as she nodded. “Understood.” She tilted her head as she stared at Emily for a moment before she cleared her throat and looked out the door. “Well…” she looked back at Emily and offered a smile. “I should go…I uh…I need to report back to my office.”

Emily nodded. “And I’ll go into surgery soon.”

“Good luck with that.” Y/n huffed a chuckle as she nibbled on her lip. “It was great working with you, Agent Prentiss.”

Emily smiled softly. “You too, Agent Carter. But please call me Emily.”

“Then you must call me y/n.” Y/n smiled.

Emily nodded. “Fair enough.” She grinned. “Well, I definitely owe you a beer or a drink for saving me. I sure hope we see each other again.”

Y/n grinned softly. “It’s a date.” She shrugged. “I’ll call you tomorrow to check on you…and to talk about that beer or drink.” She winked at Emily. “See you around, Emily.”

Before Emily could say anything else, y/n was already out the door. Emily’s eyes widened slightly as y/n’s words kept running in her mind. ‘It’s a date’. A date. Was it a date? Emily was not entirely joking, she did want to buy her a drink for saving her, which she normally wouldn’t have offered, but felt the need to. But she hadn’t meant it as a date, she hadn’t even thought about it and the words just came out of her mouth. Of course, she wouldn’t mind going for a drink.

Y/n was really nice, Emily found herself getting along very easily with her and they fell into a comfortable rhythm to work together, which Emily really appreciated and made it easier to work this case. She also couldn’t deny that y/n was a really beautiful woman; her voice, the way she walked with confidence, the determination and dedication, her beautiful wavy hair, and the way she smiled…woah, Emily! Stop right there. She snapped out of her trance as she heard the nurse walking into the room, suddenly, Emily remembered she was still in the hospital. But even as the nurse took her to the OR and kept talking about how easy and quick the whole thing would be, she couldn’t help but keep y/n in her mind.

********************

A few weeks have passed, and Emily was allowed to go back to work, eager to already leave her apartment and get herself busy with work, even if that meant getting busy with paperwork. Not a day went by without Emily getting a visit from someone from the team, and she was not left alone at all, which of course she appreciated a lot, but she was ready to get back and actually do something herself. As she walked into her office, she stopped in her tracks as she noticed a bouquet of flowers sitting on her desk. Her eyes widened a bit as her brows raised, not really expecting this. As she made her way to the flowers, she picked up the small note that laid between the flowers.

‘Heard you’re back on duty. Welcome back! And please be safe since I’m not there to save you again ;)

-Carter.’

Emily’s breath hitched as she stared at the small note and then back to the flowers, not being able to stop her heart from beating as fast as it was. If she didn’t know better, she’d think that she was just flattered by the flowers, but the way her heart was beating? Yeah, that was not common at all. She nibbled on her lip as she leaned down and smelled the flowers, a small smile tugging at the corner of her lips at the beautiful smell. But the moment was interrupted as she heard a knock on her door, startling her and making her turn back fast.

“Emily Prentiss in the house! We missed you here, Em!” Penelope squealed as she walked to Emily. “I made sure that your office stayed clean, and also- oh?” She looked behind Emily and let out a gasp. “Who sent you flowers?!”

Emily looked back at the flowers and then back at Penelope, clearing her throat nervously. “Ah…uh…well…” she walked around her desk and then sat down, putting her bag on the desk, and looking at Penelope. “I don’t really know.”

“There’s no note?! Oh…you got a secret admirer that we don’t know about? Do I have to look into surveillance footage? Because I-“

“Garcia!” Emily interrupted, raising her brow as she offered a smile. “No need for that. And…the flowers are just…there. It’s okay.”

“Huh…” Penelope shrugged as she sighed. “Well, fine. Guess we’ll leave it at that.”

Emily nodded softly and thankfully, Penelope dropped it as she told Emily what she had been missing from the days she was not here. But all Emily could focus on was the flowers sitting at the corner of her desk. She felt a bit guilty because since she had left the hospital, she had meant to call y/n but having a full house, barely having any time for herself, it had been hard to actually get some time for herself. As Penelope kept talking, she looked down at her phone and decided to take a little step.

Emily: Good morning. Just got to my office and found some beautiful flowers sitting at my desk. Do you happen to know anyone named Carter?

Y/n: Oh, not sure. The name sounds familiar but can’t wrap my head around it.

Emily: Well, too bad because I really wanted to thank them. I loved the flowers. Happened to be my favorites too.

Y/n: Huh…this Carter must be very smart and has very good choices. Maybe they wish they could’ve seen your face when you saw them ;)

Emily looked up at Penelope as she felt herself smiling, biting her lip softly as she tried to hide it and try to focus a bit on whatever Penelope was saying. She looked down at her phone as she nodded to what Penelope had said, but half of her attention went back to her phone.

Emily: I was quite surprised, but it was nice to walk into my office to such a beautiful surprise. Thank you, y/n. You really didn’t have to.

Y/n: But I wanted to. No problem. Though I hope this means I’ve finally earned my drink and next text I get is you telling me when I can see you ;)

“Who’s texting you that has you smiling?”

Emily’s eyes widened at Penelope’s voice, and she rapidly looked up at her. “Oh, ah…what?”

Penelope chuckled softly as she raised her brow. “Oh…so you do know the person who sent you the flowers.”

“I- uh…I mean…” Emily sighed loudly and decided to give up. She licked her lips nervously before she cleared her throat. “I do.”

“Who is it?!”

“Oh, I know who those are from.” JJ suddenly showed up at the door, smirking as she noticed the flowers. She walked to them and sat on the other chair beside Penelope.

Emily stared at JJ and bit her tongue, trying to save the comment she had in mind. “JJ…”

“It’s this agent from Field Office we worked with a few weeks ago. Emily and…what was her name? Carter?” JJ smirked softly as she looked at Emily. “They got along so well.”

Emily groaned softly as she closed her eyes and looked down, placing her hands on her forehead. “You gotta be kidding me…”

“OH?!” Penelope looked between JJ and Emily, already getting excited.

“Don’t get too excited, Garcia.” Emily chuckled softly as she sighed, nibbling on her lip for a moment.

“What you mean not to get excited? Our girl found herself a girl! How can I- oh. Oh. No. Emily Prentiss, you’re not doing that.” Penelope suddenly snapped, raising her brow. JJ only chuckled softly as she covered her mouth.

Emily furrowed her brows as she shook her head. “Uh…what?”

“I know that look on your face. Just because you’re the chief, doesn’t mean you cannot have a life outside this building. And if this girl is persistent, I don’t see why not! Do you find her attractive?”

Emily stared at her, and she took a deep breath, averting her eyes for a moment as she tried to find the right words to explain the situation. “I just…” She sighed. “Yes, I find her attractive. I don’t know her very well but she’s…really nice.” She smiled a little as she looked back at the flowers.

JJ grinned softly as she looked at Penelope. “Someone has a little crush.” She teased.

Penelope nodded rapidly as she smiled and turned to look at Emily. “Em, c’mon. Call her!”

“Well…she has tried. We text and…I might’ve suggested that I owed her a drink and that has not happened yet…” Emily said the last few words almost in a whisper, a shy smile on her face.

“Oh, because she left out the fact that Carter saved Emily after she got shot.” JJ grinned.

“She did?! We need to worship her! Cute and a knight?! You definitely gotta call her and invite her out.”

Emily groaned softly as she shook her head. “I don’t know, I mean…what if she’s just being nice? What if she’s just…I don’t know…feel like she has to- hey! Give me back my phone!” She tried to stop Penelope from grabbing her phone, but she was too late.

Penelope gasped as she went through Emily’s phone. “‘Hope this means I’ve finally earned my drink and next text I get is you telling me when I can see you’?!” She looked at Emily and her jaw dropped, a chuckle leaving her lips. “Emily! It’s obvious she’s into you!”

“Why someone like her would be interested in me?”

“Oh, c’mon, Em. Anyone would be so lucky to have you, and I’m pretty sure she knows that.”

“And have you seen yourself in the mirror, babes? Please!”

Emily laughed softly, nibbling on her lip as she looked back at the flowers. She sighed softly. “I just…I’m not sure she would want to deal with me.”

“I’m gonna stop you right there, Prentiss. You are allowed to have a life outside this building.” JJ said as she looked at Emily, tilting her head as she stared at her, offering a small smile. “C’mon, Emily. What could possibly happen if you accept one drink?”

“That’s what I’ve been telling her!” Penelope whispered/yelled.

Emily stared at both of them, groaning softly as she shook her head and licked her lips. She extended her arm and grinned a little. “Give me back my phone.”

Penelope squealed as she handed back the phone. “Chief Emily Prentiss got herself a date.”

Emily chuckled softly as she shook her head, looking down at her phone as she nibbled on her lip.

Emily: How does Friday sound? 8 pm?

Emily waited anxiously for a reply, feeling JJ and Penelope’s eyes on her. It would only be fair if she took her time to answer, of course, Emily had taken her time replying back and-

Y/n: Friday sounds perfect. Would you mind sending me your address so I can pick you up?

Emily: Sure, I will :)

Y/n: Perfect. See you on Friday, agent Prentiss. Can’t wait ;)

Emily bit her lip softly as she read the message over and over again.

Emily: See you on Friday, agent Carter. Can’t wait either.

Emily looked up at JJ and Penelope, smiling widely as she nodded. Both women clapped and cheered for her, making Emily laugh. A drink won’t hurt…

********************

This has never actually happened to her, she was going a bit crazy on how she kept pacing around her room and how she just kept getting clothes out of her closet; she had gone through at least three dresses now, and she still didn’t find the right one. It was just drinks. A date, yes. But drinks. With a beautiful woman…she was losing her mind. Since when did she get this nervous? It wasn’t exactly her first date, but she hasn’t been really open about dating in a long time, mostly because the job had taken a lot of her time, and she had made up her mind that she didn’t exactly had time to date. But y/n knew the job, she was part of the FBI too. Was she getting ahead of herself? Thinking about y/n this much? She had not been able to stop since that day at the hospital. How could she? When she had the most beautiful smile she has ever seen and-

A sound suddenly startled Emily, snapping out of her trance when she figured out that y/n was already here. She cursed under her breath as she grabbed her heels and purse, deciding at that moment that the dress she was wearing was good enough. The moment the door of the elevator closed, she took a deep breath, trying to stop her beating heart. How was it possible that she felt so nervous? How come y/n made her feel like this, and they barely knew each other? She took a deep breath and then let it out as she walked out of the elevator. Y/n was leaning over the car, looking around as people passed in front of her, fidgeting with the bouquet of flowers she had in her hand, and then, as she turned, her eyes landed on the raven-haired woman, her breath hitching as she composed her posture, smiling softly as Emily walked to her. She couldn’t help the way her eyes darted down over her body; she was wearing a sleek, form-fitting red dress that hugged her curves in all the right places, and her hair was styled in perfect waves. She was stunning…

Y/n cleared her throat as Emily stood in front of her. “H-Hi.” She smiled softly.

“Hi.” Emily said softly, smiling as she noticed y/n’s nervousness. “Are those for me?” She grinned softly.

Y/n raised her brow before she looked down at the flowers. “Oh! Yes.” She huffed a chuckle as she handed Emily the flowers. “Sorry I…you just…” She looked back up into Emily’s eyes, smiling softly. “You looked gorgeous.” She said softly.

Emily felt her cheeks heating up as she stared at y/n, smiling softly as she accepted the flowers and tried to hide her blush by smelling the flowers. “Thank you.” She looked back up at her. “And…you look beautiful.”

Y/n grinned softly. “Thank you. I dress up once in a while.” She said playfully as she stepped aside and opened the door for Emily. “Your carriage, m’lady.”

Emily couldn’t help but laugh softly as she grinned, raising her brow. “Such a gentlewoman.”

“I’d like to think so, yes.” Y/n chuckled as she closed the door once Emily got in the car. She then walked to the pilot seat and got in the car as well, taking a deep breath before she closed the door.

At the beginning of the ride, both women were silent, both too nervous and shy to even say a word until a song started playing and both started singing to it. Both started laughing at the same time, and from then, the conversation kept going. Soon enough, Emily noticed that they had arrived at a restaurant, which surprised her a bit but also felt her heart flutter. As they sat down at the table, they both fell into a very comfortable conversation, work was out of the topic the whole night. Y/n couldn’t help but stare at Emily the whole time she spoke, finding it incredibly cute how she talked about random stuff, and she looked so passionate about it, loving how Emily seemed too different from Chief Emily Prentiss; she definitely loved her smile and laugh, and she wanted to keep seeing it and hearing it.

“So…” Emily grinned softly as she raised her brow. “This was a whole dinner…with drinks.”

Y/n hummed. “Yes.” She grinned.

“I thought I said I’d buy you a drink.” Emily tilted her head, her tone playful but also wondering what y/n had really planned.

“Well…I know you’re the one who set the day and time. But…I thought maybe this first date could be my treat.” Y/n stared into her eyes, smiling shyly as she nibbled on her lip.

“Which means that I still owe you a drink, and we’ll see each other again.” Emily nodded as she chuckled.

“Smart plan, isn’t it?” Y/n raised her brows playfully. “Is this you telling me that my plan completely failed, and you don’t wanna see me again?”  

Emily stared into her eyes, not saying a word for a moment. A smiled tugged at the corner of her lips as she thought about it, she definitely wanted to see her again…there was no denial about it. “It’s me telling you that next date, is on me.”

Y/n’a heart started beating faster at Emily’s words, her smile widening as she nodded, trying to hide the fact that she felt very excited. “I’ll hold you to that.”

After ordering dessert to share, they headed back to Emily’s apartment, silence surrounding them, but it was not awkward or uncomfortable anymore, both had smiles on their faces. As y/n parked, she got out of the car and went ahead to open the door for Emily, offering her hand for her to take. Emily chuckled softly and took it, stepping out of the car with the flowers in hand. She stood in front of y/n and stared into her eyes, smiling softly at her.

“Thank you for tonight. It was…really nice actually.” Emily said softly, not letting go of her hand.

“Of course. It was definitely nice.” Y/n smiled softly. “So…text me when you free?”

Emily nodded. “Definitely.” She smiled softly before she leaned in and kissed her cheek softly. “See you soon, Carter.” She said as she started walking away.

Y/n felt butterflies in her whole body, smiling like an idiot as she watched Emily walking away. “See you soon, Prentiss.” She breathed out.

Emily watched over her shoulder and gave her one last smile before she walked into the building. She knew JJ and Penelope wouldn’t let her sleep on this, and they would tease her endlessly, because at the end of the day, they were right. She was happy that she had said yes. But at the same time, she couldn’t help but wonder if this would actually be something else. It had been a very long time since Emily had actually thought about dating someone, about wanting to be with someone, but the truth was that she couldn’t help but do so with y/n.

********************

“Well, then I did everything wrong.” Emily groaned as she ran her fingers through her hair, waiting for Rossi to say anything at all -once his laughter died-.

“I’m sorry to tell you that you’ll have to start over. Follow the rules, Emily. The rules.” Rossi laughed before he hung up.

Emily looked at her phone and cursed under her breath, putting back her phone on the counter and walking to the stove, groaning softly as she thought about starting all over again. And then a knock on the door made her realize that it was already late, looking down at her watch and sighing. She walked to the door and opened it with a shy smile on her face, her face soon enough softening as she stared at y/n. A box in one of her hands and another, flowers…God, y/n would literally give her a whole garden if she could.

“Hello pretty girl.” Y/n smiled softly. “Since you told me you wanted to stay tonight…I thought I’d bring dessert.”

Emily smiled softly as she scoffed. “Well, I’m afraid to tell you that we will have to order take out.” She stepped aside to let y/n walk in.

Y/n furrowed her brows as she walked in and the first thing she did was turn to Emily’s kitchen, raising her brow as she saw the mess on the kitchen island. “I…take it that you wanted to make dinner for us?”

Emily nodded as she sighed. “And failed.” She looked at y/n as she bit her lip softly. “I’m sorry.”

Y/n smiled as she walked to the kitchen island and placed the box and flowers on it, turning to look at Emily. “What if we do it together?”

Emily furrowed her brows. “What? You don’t…you don’t feel…I don’t know, disappointed?”

Y/n tilted her head. “Disappointed? Em…” She took her hands and brought them to her lips, kissing the back of her hands. “You tried. And the thought is very sweet. And…” She shrugged. “What a better date than getting to cook with you?”

Emily felt her heart fluttering as she stared into her eyes, a smile spreading across her face. “That…sounds good.”

“I gotta admit that I’m better at dessert, but…we’ll try out best.” Y/n grinned as she pulled Emily with her.

Not too long after, the kitchen was surrounded with laughter, both women having the time of their lives as they tried Rossi’s recipe once again, but this time, Emily wasn’t even worried about or stressed. She enjoyed the fact that she could laugh and have fun with y/n while trying their best attempt to get the recipe right this time. Emily couldn’t help but smile as she stirred the sauce and y/n wrapped her arms around her waist, resting her chin against her shoulder as she watched the sauce, and teased Emily saying that she already looked like a top chef. After they were done in the kitchen, they went ahead and sat down at the dining table.

“I think Rossi would be proud of us.” Emily nodded as she took another bite off her plate.

Y/n nodded as she hummed. “It’s so good, I might ask him to give me some lessons because I don’t want any other pasta in my life.”

Emily laughed softly as she stared at y/n. She stared at her for a moment as she smiled, licking her lips softly. “I’m sorry if tonight didn’t go as planned. I really wanted to surprise you with dinner.”

Y/n looked up at Emily and raised her brows. “Are you kidding? This was way better than I expected. I had so much fun. And I just…loved seeing you happy and smiling like that.” She smiled softly as she tilted her head. “The best date I’ve had.”

Emily blushed slightly as she nodded, taking her glass, and taking a sip of it. “Good.” She tried to hide her smile behind her glass.

Y/n smiled softly and went back to the pasta. She then grinned softly and grabbed a single spaghetti, only putting the end of it in her mouth and turning to Emily. “What do you say if we do the lady and the tramp scene?” She raised her brows.

Emily furrowed her brows but couldn’t help laughing as she looked at y/n, the spaghetti hanging from her mouth. And yet, she didn’t think twice before she grabbed the other end and put it in her mouth, starting to eat it. Soon enough, their faces were inches apart from each other, eyes locked, they stared at each other for a while, not moving an inch. Emily was the one who broke the spaghetti and leaned in to press her lips against y/n’s. Y/n’s breath hitched, her eyes instantly closing and placing her hand on Emily’s cheek, trying to keep her in place as she kissed her back. The position was a bit awkward, the table coming in between them, but they didn’t mind it much as they continued the tender kiss. Emily was the one to break the kiss, taking a deep shaky breath as she opened her eyes, staring back into y/n’s who was already looking at her, a silly smile on her face.

“And you still doubt that this is the best date?” Y/n teased as she bit her lip.

Emily ran her tongue over her tingling lips, chuckling softly at her teasing. “Couldn’t help it when you were being all cute.”

“You mean stupid.” Y/n chuckled.

Emily shook her head, her hand holding y/n’s and bringing it to her lips. “Not stupid at all.” She grinned softly. “What do you say we skip to dessert?”

Y/n smiled. “Let me just tell you that it’s the first time I make this sort of cake and- oh. Wait.” Her smile then turned into a smirk. “You don’t mean that dessert.”

Emily shook her head as she bit her lip. “No.”

Y/n grinned. “I like your idea of dessert better.”

Emily chuckled softly before she stood up and pulled y/n with her to her room. Needless to say, the other dessert was completely forgotten.

********************

Emily shook her head as she tried to ignore the fact that her phone kept vibrating in her pocket, trying to focus on the task she had right in front of her, but her mind drifting away every now and then. She felt guilty, to say the least. After that night in her apartment, Emily had become so busy with work that she had her schedule pretty much full, but that was not all of it. In a night accompanied by her overthinking, Emily couldn’t help but think that maybe she was not what y/n needed. They hadn’t really talked about where this was going, but Emily could feel that once she gave in, things would start to crumble. That’s how it always was. She was not exactly made for relationships, because she always messed up.

She hasn’t meant to ignore y/n’s texts or calls, she did answer…every now and then. But she didn’t know how to put into words that she didn’t think things would work, and not because she couldn’t just say it, but because she knew that sort of her didn’t mean it. She liked y/n. Hell, she could swear with her life that she was starting to fall, but it was too good to be truth. She barely had any good things in her life aside from her team. But y/n was too good to be truth. She was so sweet and kind, she was beautiful and so…incredibly hot. She had never met anyone like y/n, which scared her. Sleeping with her had not exactly been in her plan for that night, but she hadn’t been able to control herself. And boy, she did not regret it. Which is why she felt even more guilty, thinking that she gave y/n the idea that she just wanted to get her in bed, and that was it.

Emily looked up at her door when she heard a knock, and then went back to her file as she told them to come in. As she heard the door closing again, she looked up and she froze for a moment, her heart stopping as her eyes connected with y/n’s. She noticed the serious look on her face, and it made Emily’s body shiver and not in a good way.

“Y/n…what are you doing here?” Emily said softly, trying not to sound harsh.

“You were not answering my calls…or texts. I thought maybe paying you a visit wouldn’t hurt.” Y/n said softly as she sighed. “Emily…did I do or say something wrong?”

Emily furrowed her brows. “What?”

Y/n shrugged. “It’s…it’s been three weeks. Since we were together. You said you’d call, and I know you’ve been busy. But you just…entirely ignored me.” She shook her head as she looked at Emily. “Did I do something wrong?”

Emily groaned softly as she scratched her head, nibbling on her lip as she tried to think what to say. “Y/n…I didn’t mean to do that. I just…I’ve been busy.”

“You can save that excuse, Emily.” Y/n snapped. She sighed and looked away for a moment, licking her lips nervously. “Look…” y/n looked back at Emily as she crossed her arms over her chest. “If…you don’t want us to go out anymore, I get it. But please just…be honest with me, and don’t leave me hanging and waiting for you.”

Emily felt a pang of guilt as she stared at her, standing up from her desk and walking over to y/n. “Y/n…”

“I get it that I’m a bit…silly. You can call me weird if you want. But I just…” y/n huffed a chuckle as she looked down at her hands. “I never…felt more comfortable to be myself…without having to worry if it’d be too much or not.” She looked back at Emily as she shrugged. “And you…you made me feel safe to do that. I’m sorry if it was too much.”

“Gosh, no!” Emily shook her head as she grabbed y/n’s hands in hers. “I…” She sighed. “You’re amazing. You’re…so cute and sweet. I never thought that you were too much or weird or silly. You make me smile more than anyone.” She smiled softly. “I was an idiot for just dropping you like this.”

“Why did you do it then?”

“Because…” Emily looked into her eyes as she frowned. “…it seemed too good to be truth. And when that happens…it normally doesn’t end well at all.”

Y/n furrowed her brows. “Emily…”

“Since the very beginning. The way you acted with me, the way you smiled and looked at me, how easily you made me laugh and just feel…happy. It all seemed too good to be truth. And that scared me.” Emily said softly, afraid that if she spoke louder, her voice would waver. “I just…I was afraid that if I gave in to this happiness, it would soon end. I’ve…been hurt before. I feel like I’m not actually made for relationships.” She chuckled sadly.

Y/n tilted her head as she took a step closer to Emily, letting go of one of her hands and placing it on Emily’s cheek. “Em…I would never hurt you. Didn’t you hear what I said? I had never felt more happy or safe with anyone else. And I…want you.” She smiled softly.

“You do?” Emily whispered softly.

Y/n nodded. “I do.”

“With…flaws, traumas, and everything?” Emily smiled sadly.

Y/n chuckled softly as she nodded. “Everything.” She let go of Emily’s other hand and placed it on her waist, pulling her closer to her, leaving a small space between their bodies. She then rested her forehead against Emily’s and smiled a little. “Take a chance on me, Em…please.” 

Emily chuckled softly, closing her eyes for a moment to relish this moment. She placed her hands on y/n’s neck, smiling softly. “Yes.”

Y/n smiled widely. “Yes?”

Emily nodded. “Yes.” She looked into her eyes, studying y/n’s face as she smiled. “I want us to date.”

Y/n chuckled softly, trying to hide the happiness she felt but knew it was useless. She wrapped her arms around Emily’s waist and brought their lips together into a sweet, gentle kiss, missing the feeling of Emily’s lips against hers. Emily smiled against her lips before she kissed her back, wrapping her arms around her neck to bring her closer, while y/n’s hand went up her back, rubbing it softly as they kissed.

Emily broke the kiss but stayed close to y/n, pecking her lips before she smiled. “You were thinking about the Abba song, weren’t you?” She said playfully as she looked into her eyes.

“I was ready to get my Rosie act, and sing like her.” Y/n grinned as she leaned in and kissed Emily’s jawline, tracing her kisses down her neck.

“Of course.” Emily chuckled softly, biting her lip as she tilted her head to give y/n more access.

“Emily, I have- oh my god.” Garcia stopped in her tracks as she stared at both women, her eyes wide at the scene in front of her. “I’m…sorry. Didn’t know you had company.

Emily jumped slightly, making y/n turn back to look at Garcia, both their eyes slightly widened. “That’s why you knock first.”

“I did, but guess you were too distracted here.” Garcia raised her brow. “You must be the famous Carter.”

Y/n looked back at Emily and then at Garcia, extending her hand to shake Garcia’s. “You can call me y/n. Or Carter is fine too.” She chuckled.

Emily smiled softly as she looked between y/n and Garcia, and then her eyes stayed on Garcia. “She’s my girlfriend.”

Garcia looked at her with wide eyes and her jaw dropped as she stared at both of them. She then squealed and chuckled softly. “I knew this would get somewhere! I called it! I’m so happy for you.” She then gasped. “Oh my god, new addition to girls' night. It’s gonna be amazing!”

Emily chuckled softly. “Garcia…you came to give me something?”

Garcia nodded. “Right, here, the reports you asked for.” She handed her a file and then smiled. “I’ll just leave you two lovebirds alone.” She chuckled softly and then stopped before she closed the door. “By the way, you’re so charming and sweet, the flowers? On my knees for you two. Nice to meet you, new friend.” She giggled before she left the office, running to JJ’s desk.

Y/n chuckled softly as she turned to look at Emily. “Girlfriend, huh?” She grinned.

Emily smirked. “Isn’t that what we agreed on just now?”

“Yeah.” Y/n pulled her closer again, wrapping her arms around her. “It’s just nice to hear it.”

“It’s nice to say it.” Emily smiled softly before she leaned in and kissed her lips again.