#i wanna go back and rewatch but for now my thoughts
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hellishvxbes · 2 months ago
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𝐇𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐔𝐕𝐀 𝐁𝐎𝐒𝐒 𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐓𝐒
Under a read more cuz its gonna get long. anyways, spoilers blah blah blah dont read if you wanna be spoiled
ALRIGHT.
First thing I'mma talk about is Millie and how I am afraid for Moxxie and Millie's marriage.
The fact that she is not excited about this pregnancy can be for a multitude of reasons. For every sad fuck who wants to project homophobia on her cuz she wanted to off two gay guys, so fuck yourself. Not only is she moody, everyone is seeing a family. A FAMILY. KIDS. Moxxie making his stance very clear that this was something he would step aside from if they went through with it. Moxxie already seems like he would LOVE to have kids.
She talked to her sister about it, and while she said she feels a little better, she still seems to have your doubts. Kids is so important to bring up to your parent BEFORE you get married. not everyone wants them. the reason me and this dude i knew from the beginning weren't gonna get along was cuz he wanted kids and I did not. for my own reasons. none of which are anyone's business. if the case that millie and moxxie did not have this conversation, it could rock their relationship pretty hard if Millie doesn't want to keep it. and there's a billion ways she could go about it. and not telling Moxxie right away, kind of scares me. but whatever her choice is, its her choice. it could be just, shes worried about how they will afford to raise a child, bringing a child into this world, maybe she isnt sure she'd be a good mother. maybe shes not ready to surrender what she has right now to take care of a child. there's so much that goes into it. but one way or another, i feel like moxxie might push a little too hard and it comes out in all the wrong ways. I just. they are so wholesome to me, they aren't perfect but they work on things so well SO LIKE IM SUPER WORRIED FOR MY BABIES.
SECONDLY. OCTAVIA
Now we've only really seen snippets and shes been the total cliches of a teenage daughter. Im really happy to see more and god I felt her pain so much. my situation is different, i want my parents to get fucking divorced, my father is an asshole and I tell my mom everyday how I would back her if she really wanted to leave my dad. it never happens tho. because they are looked up to members of the church, because divorce is against their religion. its just so infuriating seeing how much they dont like each other and they staying together. i hate hearing them fight. or when they bring me into their fights. each one talking about the other to me while i keep saying their marriage isn't mine to fix.
a lot of things octavia sang about were things I feel about my mom. I have a lot of anger and resentment for her, how she always chooses everyone else over me. and how everything just turns out a disappoint or a lie. so I see where her anger lies when she said Stolas choose 'him' over her. Her 'yeah I'll be okay but I'll never be the same' and honestly, stolas is a lot to blame for this. its hard being in a loveless relationship. especially when a child is involved, but all this, had he done it sooner when she was a child, it would still have some effects but i think it wouldn't have been as bad. Idk honestly if Octavia can see what a piling of shit her mother is BUT I DIGRESS. shes taking a decision, shes choosing to cut him out. maybe it will change but for now, that is where her mind and heart are at. shes protecting herself from more heart and disappointment despite how we all know she still loves and misses her dad. that will never change.
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i love this bit of symbolism at looking at parts of his garden are already dying. plants need neutering, they need proper attention for them to grow, the same way every child needs their parent. it really shows how stolas's absence will change her.
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2 points here. who the fuck is she talking to on the phone
and WHY ARE THEY ONLY RESORTED TO EVIL LAUGHTER. like okay i get you won. but is that honestly it from these two?? i want more from them, I know andre is more the brains here, but like, there needs to be more.
NEXT IS STOLAS
baby was having such a hard time, and he will still struggle. people being like 'he JUST now realizing he's poor' no he's been noticed, hes been in shock. like hes' literally just been holding it in, trying not to make a fuss about it cuz theres not much either him or stolas can do. the moment blitz is like 'you're gonna need to start making money come in now too right' he loses it cuz hes never had to work for anything in his life. it was inherited to him. the thought of actually being in the working class, working on a holiday , yeah like allll us bitches already know the struggle. hes brand baby new. so he has a breakdown. he says he was stupid, cuz at this point?? he doesn't think blitz would do the same for him. giving his life up for someone who doesnt see him the same way he does.
stolas punching him was a much needed thing to do, cuz everything else aside this motherfucker was fucking cheering for him to lose everything. fabricated everything. its really this guys fault for taking it this far. he absolutely deserved that. I also love the way andre was like fuck the goetia i'm gonna fucking kill you. also stolas's 'do it, pussy' WAS SO GOOD. HOW DEEP HIS VOICE GOT.
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the way i snorted at this
the ending was sweet, the dance between stolas and blitz was cuteee but its gonna take time before these two can officially be happy. stolas is probably not gonna be with him fully until he has octavia. gets a chance to really explain himself to her. cuz right now, it would look like shes right if he allowed them to be together. and i know its what stolas wants deep down, but for him, his child comes first. and its cause some riffs, cuz blitz seems to finally come to terms with his feelings for him but stolas is now unsure. theres a lot more to consider now. and as a parent? its so hard to want to have things for yourself, when it will affect your child. and we know stolas feels the same, he wasn't upset anymore when he saw blitz risking his life to save his. his attitude toward that bit did change, now its other things that will keep them from being happy rn.
blitz bring up his sister hit a very hard place for me. one I can't even fully talk about for reasons I can't explain either. i just know how hard it is to, lose a sibling you were close to, and suddenly youre strangers. you learn to move on and adapt, but theres still that feeling. and soooo much shit that goes into it but yeah. emotions are abound yall
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mulders-too-large-shirt · 5 months ago
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s4 episode 5 thoughts
i’m back. i’m back and i’m intrigued. because i'm reading the episode description, and if we get more mulder ex lore here, which the episode description makes it sound like we will, i am… not sure how i will feel on the subject. the term “reincarnation” makes it sound like whoever it was… died. did an ex of his die? and that is a lot of mulder marked by pain and suffering. and maybe i’m getting ahead of myself. but the writers KNOW we want our agents to smooch, so focusing on an ex might make me, the viewer, feel weird. i just need to get all these thoughts out in writing before we begin.
how is he gonna tell if someone is a reincarnated lover? or am i misunderstanding this entirely. 
only one way to find out
author’s note: oh my gosh…… nothing could have prepared me for this. at all. here i was thinking it was ex lore time, but it was past life time, and there are TEARS in my eyes.
(serious author's note: i ask for some grace in this episode recap. there may be some things i word poorly. i am familiar with the terminology used to describe DID, and did my best, but acknowledge that i may have come up short. please understand that this is intended to capture my live reactions to what i was seeing for the very first time. at times here, there are no reactions, just a sort of a nebulous recapping of what i saw because i was feeling So Many Things. so this one might be messy, and i hope that is okay. i don't understand what i am feeling, but i am feeling a Lot of it, and humbly ask for your patience in my clumsy wording as well as some helpful discussion on what just went down)
let us begin, i type as i sniff up some tears
we open with mulder in a field… is he reciting poetry? and looking very sad. 
wait, is he not actually reciting poetry and he just talks like that? while holding two pictures of old timey people. i’d guess civil war era.
okay. so now we jump right to the intro. that was quick. i’m still processing what we just saw because we were really dropped into that one with no context whatsoever.
federal agents break into a temple in tennessee. they’re looking for illegal firearms! and a guy named ephesian.
but mulder sees a window… and he is staring at it… walking out the door as if led by some sort of spiritual quest while scully yells his name and wonders wtf he’s doing. he is not responding to her at all, but she’s chasing after him because she is a good friend.
so he’s hearing things while scully is pulling her gun out, and it does appear that he found a trapdoor!
he busts in, and slaps some poison out of the hand of a woman who was taking sips, and then grabs the dude who i assume is the cult leader. whew… that was close
now they’re at some sort of meeting, listening to tapes, and skinner is here!!! hiiii skinner. everybody say hi skinner!
so, someone on the tape seems to be whistleblowing on this cult- the seven stars or something- saying that the leader is hurting children and stockpiling weapons. mulder looks incredibly pensive during all of this.
oh! someone refers to mulder as “our man spooky”, which is kind of hilarious, while complaining that the reports were weak. scully leans in and asks yeah, how did he know that? while the men are fighting.
and skinner yells KNOCK IT OFF!!!! because the folks at the compound were somehow able to hide all the evidence before they got there, and now they’re forced to hold ephesian and “his wives” on “BS charges”. so now the agents MUST find evidence of firearms and who the informant was NOW because they will try to get an arraignment fast.
woah. no pressure.
skinner comes over talk to mulder and scully- they must look into this ephesian fellow's claims of supernatural abilities. scully says he can use the book of revelations to manipulate his followers, but seems to suspect no real powers. 
they to talk to this ephesian fellow, who says he knew for 9 centuries that scully was coming, and starts going on about the bible, quoting stuff. very scary behavior.
mulder comes in with the fact check. jesus said that at smyrna, not about some church in tennessee! (his knowledge…. it always impresses me)
this dude is being super creepy, telling them to put aside their investigation “for your own souls”, because soon all unfaithful shall “be destroyed by God’s mighty men”. so this is some pretty standard cult rhetoric here. if you've studied religions, you've heard this one many times. it seems that ephesian thinks he and his people shall be the ones doing this violence. a tight zoom in on mulder’s troubled face as he quotes more scripture.
they have 6 wives to question, and mulder says to start with one in particular. interesting… i wonder why that one. is it because she was the one they caught ephesian with in the hidden area... or something more?
her name is melissa, and she says she’s 25 as she smokes a cigarette and dodges their questions. she’s been at the compound and married to ephesian for a year. 
mulder asks if it troubles her that ephesian has so many other wives, and she just recites scripture instead of answering. so scully comes in with the “i’d have a tough time if my husband had so many children with other women”. this seems to begin to get her to crack, as she tears up.
wait... it’s so wrong to hear scully call someone else, who isn't her sister, melissa :(
melissa she doesn’t have any children with ephesian yet... because he has to wait for God to tell him that the right soul is ready to be reincarnated, which is why his children are the most sacred members of the temple. naturally, of course /s
things get quiet when they ask if he had been hurting the children until melissa starts talking with a very different voice and set of mannerisms, and she no longer replies to the name melissa. so scully scrawls “multiple personality” in her loopy handwriting and passes it over to mulder. oh! is this sydney?
(at this point, i shall begin to refer to sydney with he/him pronouns, as this is what mulder does. normally i would stick to my journalistic integrity and keep reporting the things i wrote down incorrectly while watching the episode, but i'm trying to be very respectful- i hope you understand)
but mulder writes back to scully no, this is not a multiple personality case, it's a past life case! his handwriting is very blocky. to prove his point, he asks sydney who the current president is, and he responds that it is harry truman. ah. so, he's a few years off.
mulder claims that “somehow he just knew” sydney was melissa's past life, which doesn’t reveal a lot, but his eyes are very soulful and i want to hold his hand.
skinner says they need to find something to get this case moving forward, and mulder is like dude, we found sydney, the voice matched! i would agree with his judgement that this in fact a sizeable discovery.
mulder is saying that what they have seen matches the criteria of DID in the DSM4 (woah, need to look up when we switched to 5), but scully is saying that some people don’t even think it exists as a condition, and skinner thinks it could be a trap to buy more time for ephesian. so no one is in agreement here.
but mulder is going into his psychology expert mode and is making a very compelling case that this is an example of DID, particularly in the fact that sydney emerged when the topic of child abuse came up, which fulfilled the protector role. scully wants to know more before giving any sort of diagnosis, but she doesn't seem opposed to the hypothesis.
(skinner seems to fumble over which pronouns to use for each personality here)
skinner says to go ahead and take her back to the compound and see if it gets any results in prompting memories that could be useful to the investigation, but scully is mad at mulder! he didn’t even have the courage to tell skinner he thinks they're dealing with past lives here! mulder, who is usually so brave!!
he mumbles that skinner wouldn’t believe him. which is true.
woah, i don’t know how to interpret this line here, so i’ll just write it down for further analysis:
“i don’t believe that you feel responsible for those 50 lives. or melissa reidel. you are only responsible to yourself, mulder”
(is she saying he doesn’t care about those 50 people?? is she saying he has an ulterior motive? is she calling him a liar, and that he is using this case to gain support for his supernatural ideas?? is she calling him selfish? or is she trying to tell him that he can only be responsible for himself and control his own actions, that he cannot place the burden of saving everyone upon his shoulders? is she berating or reassuring him or both? does she think he isn't serious about the lives in danger?)
i can’t figure it out, but he gets up and leaves. (after watching the episode, i still can't figure it out- what did you think?)
so they take melissa back to the temple, and scully asks her to recall the painful memories so they can keep herself and others safe. it is very tense as she walks into a bedroom and sees many photos on the wall of ephesian and his wives. she knocks some of them over and starts crying.
scully still looks furious with mulder. it's as if she thinks his desire for supernatural entities to be proven comes ahead of his desire to save actual lives, and it's recalling her comparison to ahab during the conversation on the rock. she must feel that there is no time for this, that they need to get concrete answers right away or horrible things will happen; perhaps she thinks he isn't focused, is being fanciful. and i understand the pressure of a ticking clock, but after so long, this rift between them, it doesn't feel right.
oh my goodness, we see some horrific artwork on the wall by the kids at the temple. woah. shoutout to the set design team.
melissa is in the playroom sobbing, but asks why she is being called melissa. scully asks what she should call her, and that is how we meet lily. but lily isn’t there for very long before sydney comes back, saying to “leave the kid alone”. mulder says they can all be safe if they just are told where the guns are. then melissa seems to come back, and she goes back out the window where mulder was staring earlier!!! what does this window know?!?
and the score here is really pretty as she walks outside, scully following behind her. mulder is clearly unwell, though, and scully asks what is wrong, which he ignores and walks past her. typical him.
a new alter of melissa's seems to front, now with a southern accent, saying the guns are in a bunker. but… it’s the civil war she’s talking about. she was a nurse, looking for someone who was staying in tennessee. and she found that someone here, dead. then she was hidden in a bunker while the battle raged above her. it is very horrific, what she is describing.
she clarifies that she was there in november 1863, then turns to mulder and says “as were you”. he doesn’t seem shocked by this, but scully is, as this new southern belle proclaims “this is the field where i watched you die” OH!
(mulder, a confederate in a past life… this is deeply unfortunate)
mulder is trying to make a phone call to a hypnotist while they drive melissa back to the police station, but scully figures out he’s trying to do past life regression on her and says not to. and that her life is in shreds, and that is too much for her to handle. i hate to say it, but i agree with her. melissa has been through so much, and with such a tight deadline, i don't know if they have time for such a journey.
OH! mulder is angry. his voice is all growly as he yells “YOU WERE THERE, SCULLY! you saw it, you heard it, why can’t you feel it?” oh my gosh… the way he slammed his hand on the wheel... why can't she see it, it seems so obvious to him... how infuriating it must be...
scully asks why ephesian is a paranoid sociopath for claiming to be in greece years ago, but he isn’t for claiming to have died in that field……. damn…….
(idk what’s going on here between them exactly but i’m stressed. they are stressing me out)
(at this point, we begin a sequence in which i am so enraptured with what is going on, i have no reactions to all of the things i am seeing, and just recount them to you, with occasional interjections of "oh my god"- but i think if you've seen the episode, you get why it had this effect on me)
so they do get a therapist, who is talking to melissa. she begins to answer the therapist's questions about seeing anything upsetting at the compound, talking about a woman named elizabeth and her son scott, who came to live in the temple. and ephesian took the son away. but ephesian caught his mother visiting her son, and “the mighty men” beat her, which brings melissa to tears as she recounts this. and he hit the boy, calling him garbage, beating him.
scully looks very stressed in the background to hear all of this, but sydney is now fronting at this point, saying to leave melissa alone, and that the guns are in the bunkers… somewhere. where they are is a mystery, though.
scully leans down to mulder and says that maybe there is a map somewhere, but mulder says she knows where to find them. and at this she says “mulder…” in a very breathy fashion and i still can’t quite articulate what is going on between them…. but he’s going in.
he says it’s me, melissa, and asks her to go back to the field. “your eyes may have changed shade, but it cannot color the soul behind them”, she says. that they are only to meet in passing in this life. and she misses him. he just stared and stares, before his head falls into his hands
scully is trying to explain to him that this is a product of melissa's illness, and she can’t give any specifics- no names or locations, and they don’t have time to do this, because ephesian’s arraignment is in two hours.
“wouldn’t you, scully? wouldn’t anybody?” <- oh my god…. is he compelled by a terrible sense of duty or by his own curiosity? is she scared to watch him go down this path he cannot return from?
okay, so now he is going back into his past lives. this sequence is almost entirely a close up of his face, for minutes on end, which adds to the intensity. he's really panting as he remembers. “ghetto streets. shattered glass. bodies of the dead. a jewish woman. poland.” oh my god…… 
he says that he is samantha’s mother in this life; “in this life, she is my son”
his father is dead, and… HIS FATHER IS SCULLY? WHAT? i didn’t see that coming. she’s troubled by this, all of this, not just learning he believes her soul to have been his father before.
but he says that his father is waiting now for their souls to come back together, different, but always together, again and again, to learn.
and he is crying. he can’t go to his father. a gestapo man is there, and he is cancer man; “evil returns as evil, but love… souls mate eternal”. and his wife is melissa, who is taken away to the camps. and he’s crying, and scully is watching with great concern.
now, he’s rising above the field, near the bunker. and his sergeant is also dead, and “he is scully”, and we cut to her face of increasing sadness. sarah holds him, who is melissa. she is sarah kavanaugh, and he is sullivan biddle. she doesn’t know that he’s waiting for her, that they will live again. 
scully tries to ask if he sees any bunkers, but he keeps saying his soul is tired, and he wants to rest.
and this is devastating. it was if i was the one undergoing the hypnosis here. i couldn't look away, i couldn't react, i was so entirely absorbed and confused and busy feeling things.
scully is consulting a map in the town records to try and find this bunker where the weapons are stored, and then she looks up the names he mentioned. sure enough, they are in the county records. then she reaches for some photos, where she finds one of sullivan and sarah. 
a lot of things are being processed in her brain, so we might need to give her a minute. i think we can see some long-held systems of belief being challenged in her mind.
but she brings him back the photos of their past lives, even as she is telling him that ephesian is going to be released soon. why would she do this? to comfort him? to validate him without using words?
oh my god, mulder just called her “dana”. wait. hold on. oh my god, hold on.
“dana, if, um… early in the four years we’ve been working together… an event occurred that suggested or somebody told you that… we’d been friends together in other lifetimes- always- wouldn’t it have changed some of the ways we looked at one another?”
“even if i knew for certain, i wouldn’t change a day”
WAUGHHHHHHHH (ripping my clothes off in grief) WAOUGHHHHHH wouavhhhghhhh……… she wouldn’t change a day….
(and what event was it that he is referring to? is there a certain one...? am i forgetting something from early s1...? damn you, my obsessive note-taking impulses, for not kicking into gear until s2...)
“well… maybe that flukeman thing, i could have lived without that just fine” HDHJSNSME he smiles as she leaves….
(i had to google what that even was because i was like ??? but the flukeman was the season 2 sewer baby!!! for those of you who are going into this whole thing blind and also don't know what the fandom calls stuff! i think to me he was "baby sewer mermaid" or something along those lines... but now we know)
so now he and melissa are in the room together, trying to recall. she says she wants to believe (!!!), and he’s rubbing her hand, but ephesian comes in, saying it’s time to leave. so she rips the photo in half and leaves crying. 
does he know he was supposed to love her? is he mourning that he hasn't? is he wondering if he has time to?
mulder gets up, and leans his head against the wall. scully comes in to say that they are still searching for more bunkers as the temple people return to their home. there is a deep sense of grief.
ephesian seems suspicious. 
mulder is talking to skinner, saying that those in the temple believe that the FBI are the devil’s army, prophesied to be defeated by the armies of god. but ephesian must not really believe that, because he hid the weapons. mulder emphasizes that he may “deny himself”.
back at the compound, all the members are being called to worship. the music is getting scary, and guns are being pulled out. 
scully looks up some bible verses and realizes that ephesian is calling his members to the end of times, which gives skinner the go ahead to launch a raid.
back at the compound, the poison is being distributed to the members of the temple. and a few are shooting at the agents outside, and mulder and scully pull up as the sipping of the poison begins inside. 
NO! mulder puts his hands up and begins to walk into the compound!!!!! WHAT IS HE DOING!!! scully shouts out that he is dead. as we see inside there are piles and piles of bodies, including melissa.
but wait! is she still alive???? she’s getting up!!! 
but no! ephesian is still there watching her. giving her poison to take. mulder is running in as fast as he can, trying to figure out what is going on. and he finds the room full of the bodies while gregorian chanting is in the background. 
he finds melissa, with no pulse, holding onto the photo she had torn. 
scully sees him touching her arm, raising his eyes and crying. 
we end where we began, with him in the field, holding the pictures of his and melissa’s past lives. 
end episode. 
what…..
first thoughts: i don’t quite know what to make of this, but i can tell it is going to tear me apart for the rest of my life.
second and third thoughts are also variations of my first thought.
i feel so sad? to know that mulder has (or thinks he has) lived these horrific past lives, and that he is reunited with the same people over and over again, to learn and lose them. and that scully was there with all of them- but so was melissa, and he said that soulmates are eternal, so if that is true he lost his for this life. and he said he was so tired, so tired... how can he escape the eternal cycle of samsara?
and scully, watching all of this- what did she mean when she said that he wasn't responsible for anything but himself? was it an insult? was she begging him? what was she feeling when she heard him talk about her being there in his past? was she trying to hurt him in their conversation in the car? will they ever actually be able to see eye to eye? does she believe him? can she? how does hearing all of this shake her own faith?
can you have many soulmates that come with you again and again, just in different forms? so would his soulmates be scully, and his mother and father and sister, and this melissa figure? and what are the implications of losing a soulmate in this world? is that a life of feeling that something is missing, until death? do they shuffle roles, but come again and again? is that comforting or horrific? are we to believe him?
and that terrible, terrible ending, him finding the bodies... how are we supposed to interpret that? just more grief on top of already endless grief? or are we supposed to see the poetry moment as an answer to a question that provides relief, even if it is bittersweet?
why did he want to know so badly? was he driven by duty to save? duty to find the Truth? duty to protect his loved ones and seek cosmic answers? are these separate things, or are they all intertwined in him?
i'm... really going to have to think this one over. i would really appreciate hearing your thoughts, as well. i wish i had a solid interpretation. it was very serious and sad, and it was bittersweet but filled with grief. i once again echo my earlier request for fluff. but how do you go back to the way things were once he says she was with him in every life? how does scully rationalize that? what are they to each other?
i'm pondering. it feels like something has shifted. and you can't go back now, even if i can't pinpoint what it is that changed.
i want to go back to daydreaming about apple cider dates. but it feels like you can't, you know? huh.
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xxplastic-cubexx · 3 months ago
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Honestly your tags are so fun to read every time, i'm almost more excited for them than the actual post (but not entirely because your art is SO GOOD!!!! i adore it). If you don't mind me asking, what are you studying?
i am studying psychology because i refuse to see a therapist so ill figure out whats wrong with me myself !!!!!!!
#snap chats#WITH. a minor in human resources ☝️ because im evil or something#and whatever character/s i decide to fixate on for the next three years i will also psychoanalyze them I Guess. //loud coughing//#tbh i only saw a therapist to get medicine but since bloodwork is expensive without insurance i dont even do that anymore. sad !#but yeah im a certified rambler if i dont share every thought i have so people understand me as much as i want them to ill die#which is why charles xavier if youre out there you have full rights to my brain .......... //gross wink sound//#why cant telepaths be real itd make my life so much easier. i woudnt have to talk a mile a minute anymore#because i do talk very fast because growing up my mom would cut me off a lot#so now i talk fast in fear of being cut off without all my thoughts being heard. anyways.#thank you for also enjoying my art :] a sideshow to the glory that is my tags i KNOWWW but im glad my efforts are not unnoticed 😌#back to My Major tho when i was in middle school i thought i wanted to go into comic books#but then i thought id lose my love for drawing if i did it professionally so now i do it. semi professionally#on my own terms babyyyy thats right. and if im lucky i get paid to draw my faves im living the dream babes#thats why my text posts take nine years for me to type im legitimately sitting here thinking if i said everything i wanted#and if i worded it right but even then after it's up im like 'but did i word it right tho' but its like 'bro just fucking POST IT'#'ITS NOT THAT DEEP' its as my favorite professor once told me 'youre very paranoid' and he's right !!!! im very paranoid 🥰#ok im done now. see thats why i say Ok Im Done Now its a sign im forcing myself to shut UP#wait not done Almost but not quite i was rewatching 97 to Try to get caps of charles in his combat uniform#and i fear i still cackle at erik telling charles to shut up like PLEAAASSE...... i need that bit CLIPPED#it makes me giggle ... someone remind me to clip all of erik's cameos in the squirrelgirl podcast btw#ive been meaning to do that for weeks but. oops <3 i need all my grandpa's moments CATALOGUED and AT THE READY..#ok i done fr now i have class with my you're-paranoid professor in like an hour and i wanna get some work done before then#BYYYYYEEEE. FOR LIKE TWENTY MINUTES PROBABLY IDK
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james-stark-the-writer · 10 months ago
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was just rewatching Jack Saint and Patricia Taxxon's video on Mauler (it's called "Long Critique Is Not Deep Critique" and it's like actually so fucking good) and was so taken aback by hearing Twin Peaks music in there now that i've actually seen Twin Peaks lmao, that Laura Palmer theme is so fucking good, Angelo Badalamenti is just truly on another level, i already wanna rewatch the show now (S02 is good, y'all are just cowards).
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boba-beom · 1 year ago
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are we just finding out that soobin’s got mirrors on his bedroom ceiling or is it just me 🫠😵‍💫 bc are you thinking what I’m thinking 🫠
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soobin hard thoughts
soobin eating you out OR soobin getting head and recording the ceiling pov
soobin invites your over to hang out because he knows just how fascinated you get over his mirrored ceiling. you both sit on his bed, and you go from talking, to being a little touchy with one another, and eventually start making out.
he ends up lightly pushing you so you’re laying down, head against the pillows and his body resting between your legs. you look up at the ceiling and you watch the way he descends down your body. his face buried in your neck to kiss you at every single sweet spot he knows, lifting your top to trail kisses between the mounds of your boobs.
your eyes never leave your reflections on the ceiling. he takes his time suckling on your nipples, kissing around your tits until he decides to trail even lower down your abdomen. he discards your lower garments, leaving you bare in front of him and your reflections.
“wanna feel good sweetheart?” is all he says before you let out an airy ‘yes’.
in your reflection your eyes focus on the back of his head, the way he settles between your thighs, kissing and licking small areas here and there before planting wet kisses along your slit up to your clit. once he starts eating you out with so much dedication and attention to your body reacting to his movements, he puts your legs over his shoulders. the view of your legs splayed on his back with the back of your heel digging between his shoulder blades.
“keep your eyes on the ceiling. I want you to watch yourself while I make you cum.”
OR
soobin lures you further onto the bed by making out with you, both your hands wandering until he grabs ahold of yours and places it on top of his bulge. you start palming him through his thin pyjama bottoms, knowing he isn’t wearing underwear underneath as your fingers feel a couple of veins on his shaft.
“want my cock in your mouth, sweetheart?” and you nod, wanting nothing more than that right now.
his eyes literally light up when you situate yourself between his legs, laying on your stomach and pulling his flimsy pj bottoms down.
you waste no time and start sucking on the head of his dick, eliciting soft moans out of him all while he takes his phone out and records both your reflections. the movement of your head bopping up and down his shaft through his camera has him twitching in your mouth.
you keep taking him further and deeper until he’s essentially throat fucking you, yet he doesn’t hold back his whine and moans. just know when you both rewatch the video all you can hear are his soft ‘hah- oh yes, yes baby. mmm yes like that. fuck, i wanna cum in your mouth, be good and swallow, yeah?’
and he does, his abdomen twitching as he spurts his last few droplets in your mouth and pans the camera to you showing him his load pooling on your tongue before swallowing it with an innocent smile at the end.
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princessbrunette · 3 months ago
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Rewatching season one and thinking about the scene where Wheezie walks in and Rafe quickly flips over his innapropriate magazine out of respect. Imagine him doing the same for deer!reader but because he doesn’t want to taint her innocence
waaaait why are you kind of a genius 🙂‍↕️ i see this as neighbour!rafe with deer!reader and it’s not because he doesn’t wanna taint her innocence, it’s kind of just a knee jerk reaction because he doesn’t want the hot neighbour to see his porn magazines 😒
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you come skipping over, rafe barely noticing until you’re virtually right infront of him due to the marijuana clouding his brain. his hand shoots out, flipping the magazines before running a bashful hand through his floppy hair.
“wha’s that?” you hum before you even get to greet him.
“dont worry, alright - why’re you over here anyway?” he drawls, inwardly wondering why his first reaction was to be rude to you. perhaps he’s simply irritated that he got caught.
“was looking for my parents because they’re not home. thought they might be here.” you shrug one shoulder, and he nods slowly, taking a huff from his bong. you stare over the porch, looking into the distance to see if you could see them, or anyone for that matter — as you weren’t so keen on being caught with rafe whilst he’s smoking weed. it didn’t really go with your image.
“y’want some? or….” he coughs, and you turn to blink at him.
“oh, um…” you swallow, overthinking the whole thing. you knew you’d sound deathly uncool. “i don’t smoke.”
rafe wets his lips, nodding exaggeratedly as if to silently say ‘of course.’ before putting it aside. “yeah, uh… good. shits bad for you. you— you know drugs in general just fuck everything up. they ruin lives, man they — they just take everything…i mean, shit.” he rants, growing increasingly more irritated with seemingly no one by the second. at the end of his mini rage, he slams his fist into the soft arm of the porch seat he reclines on, making you widen your eyes slightly.
“yes… that’s what they told us during the anti drug assemblies at school.” you converse, awkwardly wiping your hands down the sides of your plaid dress. you knew rafe enough now to not be so deathly shy, but that didn’t rid you of your social anxiety.
“hah…yeah. shit, i forget we went to the same school. i probably walked right by you, huh.” he calms almost immediately, in the stereotypical unpredictable rafe cameron way. he did walk right past you. many times. you nod, saying nothing at all as to not give yourself away before craning to look behind you at your exit.
“okay. well… if my parents aren’t here i should head home. they’ll probably be there soon anyway.” you glance at your shoes as rafe stands, nodding casually.
“yeah…yeah.”
you go to walk down the porch steps, but stop— feeling a wave of bravery, and turn to look at him over your shoulder, adjusting the tote bag that hangs from it. “oh… and you shouldn’t read those pornographic magazines. they’re objectifying and damaging to women.” you try to hold your chin high, but feel your face get hot. he leans against the porch balcony, seemingly unbothered as you continue walking away.
“yeah well the women in these magazines are gettin’ paid a shit tonne of money so i wouldn’t worry ‘bout them alright?” he calls out carelessly as you disappear away further, before turning his back and sighing, hand coming up to scratch the back of his neck. “shhhit.” he whispers, to no one but himself.
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tastesousweet · 10 months ago
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⭒ blurb : “if a girl walks up to you …”
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bf!hamzah x poc!reader
summary : headcannon/blurb based on the tiktok trend “if a girl walks up to you and flirts what are you doing?”
mickey speaks : randomly had this thought tdy & hamzah has been on my mind lately soooo this one’s for my slushy girls 💐 PRETTY FLUFFY (but i hope it’s not like … cringy instead of cute)
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you’re both fully in pajamas, tucked and wrapped in each other’s arms when you come across the tiktok trend that has flooded your for you page as of late
hamzah’s naturally aloof (due to a long day spent with you and it currently being almost 1 AM) and unfocused as he fights sleep while watching his tenth episode of teen titans.
so when you quickly unravel yourself from him and move across the room, adjusting your low hanging sweatpants accordingly, he’s dumbfounded and asking you what you’re doing and why you’re leaving him.
“you’re so dramatic, can you come here? i wanna do something”
“insulting me and asking a favor in the same sentence…” he sighs then pauses with a hand closed over his mouth, muffling “wow.”
literally and metaphorically tugging his arm to get him to participate but he’s adamant on knowing what exactly he’s getting up for
when he’s almost out of bed you tell him it’s “this tiktok thing” and he exaggerates a “NOOOO” and releases all of his weight so that he falls back on the bed and you practically fall with him due to your connected hands
of course he’s eventually convinced with a few kisses
hamzah fiddles with your hand while listening to you explain: “okay, pretend im not here and some girl comes up to you at target.”
he just stands in the center of the frame looking around the room as you walk away then return in character
you approach obnoxiously and begin some surface level flirting “hey good looking”
“you can back up a little bit,” he looks you up and down
“pause- did you just check her out???”
“no? you know there was definitely some judgement there.”
“sure ok, resume… now.” you play with your hair, “what’s someone as cute as you doing in a place like this?”
“bruh, we’re at a target” hamzah laughs through his words
you stop your role again, “and why are you taking time to respond to her?!”
“oh kill me for being distracted! you couldn’t have hired an ugly actress?”
you look up at him with squinted eyes, “you need to learn to resist the hot girls too!”
“i’m tryingggg!!!!” he rubs his eye harshly, “restart, restart.”
it cuts to a clip of you two acting once more
“yeah, we both loooveee target we’re, like, so alike,” you go to grab his arm and he turns completely away from you
“ok, and i have a girlfriend” he pretends to grab something off of a shelf
“that doesn’t matter if i don’t see her…”
you continue pestering so he resorts to plugging his ears with his fingers and talking over you, repeating that he has a girlfriend
eventually he turns back to face you and yells “OH MY GOD GIRL, I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND GET THE HELL AWAY FROM ME!!!!” right into your smiley face.
he then fully manhandles you over his shoulder and spins you around before dropping you onto the plushness of your shared bed
he doesn’t even look to check on you (you’re outrageously laughing and yelling “it hurts!” in regards to your poor stomach cramping)
he runs to grab your phone from the desk while recording himself in faux panic, “guys, you can’t tell y/n i just beat up a woman please, please, pl- AHHH”
he and the video are cut off by you jumping on his back and attacking his cheek with kisses through your loud giggles.
you cuddle in bed again after turning off the lights and hamzah rewatches it for a third time since you’ve posted it to your spam account (everytime it’s over he says, “no, that was actually pretty funny.”)
by the morning it has thousands of likes and plenty of comments either full of love for the two of you together or calling hamzah the funniest man in the world (they’re just like u fr!)
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tinystarbites · 5 months ago
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accidents pt. 1.5 | Spencer Reid x Reader
Okay so, WOW. I am completely blown away by the response to my first fic on here, 120 followers in 6 days are you guys okay? Because I am definitely not :,). While accidents pt. II isnt quite finished just yet (thank you so much for being so patient with me<3 uni is kicking my ass already rip), I thought I'd give you all a small sneak peek, aka the first 800-ish words of the second part. I hope you enjoy and thank you all so so much for the generous feedback so far!! <333 I'll go rewatch my genetics lecture now yippie :,,,,)
here you can read the entire first part, please head the warnings! Same ones apply here. also, if you wanna get tagged in pt. II, let me know in the comments!
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Spencer’s never sprung from his bed faster in his life before.
His heart is a jackhammer in his chest, chipping away at his ribs one bone splitter at a time because-
It’s you. In front of his door. And Spencer is so hard it hurts but- he can’t just-
“Spencer?”
He sucks in a haggard breath, hands reaching up and messing up his hair even more. His thoughts are everywhere and nowhere at once and he just needs to- needs just a moment to-
“Uh, yeah, just a second!”, he calls back, voice scratchy and used from the- the moaning Jesus Christ because he was about to come with your mental image and he somehow, magically, managed to apparently conjure you up in front of his door with his pathetic pining and oh god-
He has to- ugh- has to wash his hands and make it go away and –
“Okay, I’ll just…chill with that weird plant here.”
An overwhelmed whimper slips past his lips and he just, stands there for at least another five seconds before something in his mind snaps back into place and he rushes to the small, adjacent bathroom of his room.
After he thoroughly washed his hands, his erection has flagged off enough so that it’s not the first thing greeting you when he opens the door and thank god for that.
And oh- seeing you after doing that actually knocks the wind out of his lungs because you are just so goddamn lovely it makes Spencer want to do stupid, stupid things like cry or kiss you or spontaneously combust into a million pieces.
For once, he does something okay-ishly sensible though.
“Hi.”
You look at him, one eyebrow raised in amusement or scepticism, he doesn’t know for sure. Your eyes hold mirthful sparkles in them when he finally manages to meet your gaze, so he settles for the former of the two options.
You’re not wearing your work clothes anymore. Rather, you went for a cozy looking, oversized sweater and funkily patterned leggings. Your fashion sense outside of work always reminded Spencer of Penelope’s.
“Hi to yourself”, you chuckle, “Can I come in or are you too busy reading ten books at once?”
Spencer feels himself flush under your gentle teasing.
“Only seven books. But, yes, of course you can come in.”
He turns out of the way, creating room for you to pass him into his room. As soon as you are inside, you don’t hesitate to jump onto his bed and flop on your back with your arms spread wide.
Spencer’s breath hitches and he has to do some very extensive mental gymnastics to supress all the inappropriate thoughts from escaping the box he banished them into. Controlling his body’s response to seeing you in the same bed he was just jacking off in is… a different story. He pulls down the hem of his shirt as discreetly as possible, as he takes a seat next to you. Making sure that there is not too much distance between you two as to raise any suspicion and make it obvious he’s trying to get some distance between you, but also enough space so that he isn’t enticed to do anything unwise. Like, reach out and feel your warmth underneath his fingers. Or the softness of your skin. Or anything else really.
The more seconds tick by in which neither of you say anything, the more nervous Spencer becomes. He starts fiddling around with his fingers, aborting more than one move to steal a glance at your face to see what you’re thinking.
“Spencer”, you then finally say, voice kind of pout-y and if that didn’t make Spencer whip his head around to face you, the next thing you say for sure does. “Do you hate me?”
“Wha-“, he sputters your name, “No- no! Of course, I don’t- whe- why would you think that?”
You let out an exasperated groan, moving around until you are lying on your side, head propped up on your arm and frowning up at him. “Because you’ve been acting hella weird these last few days and you won’t tell me whyyyy”, you drag out the last syllable, pout on your lips and Spencer has to look up at the ceiling or else he’s just going to confess everything without second thought and that will definitely not happen.
“I haven’t been acting weird, really, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
You remain silent again and Spencer feels the judging glare you send his way without having to look at you. Yes, he has been acting weird, he knows that, but you can never ever know the reason why tha-
“Is it because you saw my nudes?”
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oh spencer, you weren't quite as subtle as you thought. rip my boy. also whooops another cliffhanger? haha my fingers must've slipped my bad
tags: @sebastiansstanswhore @xx-spooky-little-vampire-xx
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reidssluttywaist · 10 months ago
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Spencer's lap.
In which you grind against your boyfriend.
fem!reader, season 2 Spencer, +16.
tags: dry humping, a little bit of dirtytalk.
a/n: guys this is so bad I've never written smut before but i had this idea while rewatching season 2 and tried something, this must have a bunch of mistakes and it's not proofread at all, also if anyone wants to rewrite this better please message me lol.
You never thought you'd have to sit for a physics class ever again since you left high school, and here you are, a half hour into your boyfriend explaining very throughly to you how he can make a rocket with 'physics magic', he also made you swear you would never tell his tricks to anybody, 'cause a magician never shares his secrets, right?!
Except you didn't get sleepy like you did in high school, you never paid that much attention to physics since now, the way Spencer's smile explains every detail, the giggle he lets out as he rumbles about different facts of all the physics laws, you're amazed by how happy he is, how his brain is extraordinary.
Hearing his humbles is better than any music you could think of, and paired with the soft sound of the rain falling outside Spencer's place, you feel so cozy and safe.
You and Spencer have been together for a couple of months now, he is your first real boyfriend, both of you are inexperienced in every single part of being in a relationship, sometimes the feeling of love you feel towards him overwhelms you, almost leaving you out of breath, you can't believe how good it is to love somebody, how god it is to love Spencer.
"Wow, that one might be your best! Look how high it went" you said after his most recent "rocket" made its way to the ceiling, Spencer smiling so big and laughing, making you laugh as well.
"Did you see that? I think I've perfected my measurements it's so high!!" Spencer says with a high-pitched voice, too excited to contain himself.
"The only bad thing about this is that you have to clean this mess up" You make a sad face, looking at the place that has little bits of water splashed all over.
"Nah, it's fine! It'll dry out soon enough" he says pretending that he doesn't care about the mess, except he does.
"C'mon, I'll help you clean and make us some dinner after, ok?!" You get up from your side of the couch, and hold Spencer's hand, trying to pull him up.
"I don't wanna get up now, it can wait," He says seriously, you can almost believe him.
You try pushing him up again, but this time he pulls you against him, being more successful than you do you end up falling onto him, sitting on his lap facing him.
"I said it can wait, I can clean up later, ok? I wanna spend some time with you now." He said holding your waist and looking at you.
You've never been on his lap before, you guys make out now and then, but never in that suggestive of a position, and Spencer never makes the first move like that, you feel your stomach filling with butterflies.
"You look so good with your glasses on" You blurt it out looking at him, analyzing his face as he looks at you.
"Can I kiss you?" Spencer says, you don't need words to respond as you press your lips onto his, starting a gentle kiss.
You'll never get accustomed to kissing Spencer, his soft lips, he's so gentle almost like he's afraid you'll run away if he makes any sudden moves, little does he know you won't, you'd never run away from him you feel like you could never get enough from him.
The kiss was now way more intense, your tongue exploring his, his grip on your waist a lot tighter now, one of his hands let go of your waist and made its way to the back of your neck, making you let out a soft moan into Spencer's mouth, making his body shiver under you.
Your hips start slightly moving over Spencer's thigh, the light friction making you want more.
Spencer was breathing heavily, and you could also feel him growing against your leg, he pulled you harder against him, adjusting your cunt to be right on top of his cock, applying pressure to your hips, you moan again, and you could feel yourself get wetter by the second.
"Spence, wanna feel you." You say in between kisses, making him whimper and push you harder against him.
"Fuck" he swears under his breath, both of his hands going to the waistband of the sweatpants you were wearing. "That okay?" he asks.
"Yes, please." You've never agreed to something so fast in your life, helping him take your pants away, after a few seconds of struggling you were back to kissing him like your life depended on it.
"C-can I take yours?" you whisper, almost scared to say it, he agrees by guiding your hand to his waistband, also helping you take his pants now, you were both only with underwear now, not even bothering to take your tops off, you went back to humping him, your thin underwear fabric soaked.
Spencer's shaky hands made their way onto your shirt, both of them massing your breasts, making noises come out of your mouth and the man under you groan.
"N-need more, Spence." You say grinding your hips harder against him, and bring your hands to his underwear pushing it down just enough so his cock is free.
You start to use your hands on him, slow up and down movements just enough so he can't even keep his eyes open.
"Want your pussy, please, wanna feel you" Spencer mumbles taking your hands off his cock, his hand going to your panties and ripping them out.
That made you gasp, making your pussy even more wet.
Spencer positioned you on his cock, which was resting on his stomach, you started moving your hips up and down, both of you moaning even louder now.
"You feel so warm, baby, you're so wet for me," He says, looking at where your bodies are rubbing against each other, he looks mesmerized by this sight, mouth slightly opened as he applies more pressure to your hips, making you shiver.
Spencer never dirty talked like that before, you could see the blush on his cheeks as he did, this new side of him making your mind blurry and a not start to form on your stomach.
"I'm so close," he says, biting his lips as you try to move even harder for him.
"N-eed more, please, your fingers," you say and he immediately knows what you mean, taking one of his hands out of your hips and bringing it to your pussy, his thumb finding your clit with ease, start moving it in circles making you let out a loud moan.
"Fuck" You let out, not able to keep your eyes open.
"Can you cum for me? Please baby wanna see your pretty face as you fuck yourself on me." Spencer says, that added with his movements in your clit make your mind fuzzy, you felt the heat on your stomach spread to your legs and your body starts to shake, releasing all the tension you were feeling.
"Oh, you're so pretty like that, so pretty when you cum for me," Spencer says, helping you ride out your climax, you were so sensitive by the recent orgasms but you started to move your hips harder and faster on Spencer's cock.
He bites his lips and you feel him grip your ass, his glasses were blurry and it was so hot that he didn't take him out.
He groaned when you felt his dick twit under you, you helped him through his orgasm, kissing him when you were both done, his hands when to your back caressing it, slowly moving up and down.
"That was so good" He whispers to you.
"A dirty talker, huh?! Who would've thought?" you joke, making him laugh.
"Most men are dirty talkers so it's not that uncommon" he rumbles.
He switched up to nerdy Spencer again, making you smile.
You spend a couple more minutes just talking before getting up, you make sure to point all that he must buy you a new pair of panties to pay for the one he ripped, he agrees, saying he would buy more than one because "you'll never know what might happen, right?"
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azzibuckets · 1 month ago
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sweet [part two]
paige bueckers x azzi fudd
a/n: wrote and posted this in a car and i’m about to throw up w nausea so tread lightly
word count: 1.6k
masterlist
Azzi doesn’t want to admit it, but Ella is lovely.
When she’d stepped into the bar and met her for the first time, she’d half hoped that she’d be a clingy asshole that she could justify hating. But Ella is beautiful, with curly dark hair and full lips and gold studded ears. And she’s sweet, her voice gentle, and she gushes about how pretty Azzi is. So she can only tack on a pained smile, compliment Ella on her outfit, and hug Paige and tell her she did good.
Now, after seeing Ella so many times, they could almost be called friends. Azzi didn’t have to ask Paige when she’d told her about their history - she could see it in the way Ella had become a little more distant, wary of the two of them together, but she was always sweet as ever. And Azzi couldn’t help but think about how perfect - how perfect for Paige - she was.
Lately she’d fallen in a routine: go to games, congratulate her teammates on their win, and head back to her apartment or hotel room to sulk about her life while they did pressers and celebrated. But now, Azzi is determined to erase all thoughts of her irritatingly hot best friend from her mind. She’s snuggled into her bedsheets, prepared to rewatch Frozen for the twentieth time when she hears a knock on the door. Expecting it to be another Ubereats driver that Paige has been sending more and more frequently, she’s more than a little surprised when she sees the devil herself standing at the door.
“Surprise,” Paige says dryly, holding up a bag of takeout before pushing past Azzi.
“Well, come on in,” Azzi says sarcastically. “Didn’t know you took up a side job.”
“If the only way to contact you is through delivering food, then yeah, I will.“ Paige sets the bag down on a counter a little harder than she needs to. Her hair is freshly wet and down around her shoulders, water still dripping down her hoodie. Her cheeks are rosy from the cold, and although her eyebrows are pinched together in annoyance, the sight of her still makes Azzi shudder with want.
“Tell me how we’re teammates, we live down the hall from each other, I see you at every practice and game, and yet it’s impossible for me to get you to talk to me.” Paige questions, a fiery look in her eyes.
Ignoring the older girl, Azzi starts ruffling through the bag. Paige sighs irritatedly, running a hand through her hair, and Azzi knows the older girl well enough to know that she’s close to her last straw. “What’re you even doing here? Aren’t you supposed to be doing press right now?” Azzi redirects.
Paige yanks her sweater off, causing her shirt to ride up and expose the soft skin of her abs. Azzi swallows and looks away. “They’ll be fine without me.”
“Maybe normally.” Azzi unwraps the foil on a taco. “But you just dropped a 30 piece and I’m pretty sure the reporters are dying to hear from their little star.”
“I couldn’t give less of a fuck about the reporters,” Paige shoots back bitterly.
“What about your girlfriend?”
Paige’s eyes narrow. “What about her?”
“You don’t wanna go and celebrate her? With our team?”
Paige shrugs.
Azzi scoffs. “You’re so full of bullshit.”
“What the fuck does that even mean?”
“You dropped thirty points.”
“Yeah, you mentioned.”
“See, this is the fucking issue.” Azzi throws her hands up, exasperated. “Normally you’d be all up in my ass about it, gloating.”
“You’re mad I’m not an asshole who preens about her performance in front of someone that can’t even play?” Paige scratches her head, and Azzi almost laughs at how comedic the situation is.
“You’re missing the point!” Azzi’s voice rises, and she fights to keep it in control. “You should be out there getting drunk off your ass with our friends and your girlfriend, but you’re over here, trying to take care of me.” Azzi knows Paige loves celebrating after a win, especially after a performance like tonight’s. Her best friend thrives in the company of others. And although there’s a small part of her that softens at the fact that Paige clearly rushed here to be here after one of the best games of her life, the part of her that loves Paige more than anything in the world - the biggest part of her - is angry that the older girl felt the need to come here and join Azzi’s pity party, to act nonchalant about her performance when she deserves to be surrounded by praise.
“You’re mad at me for caring about you? That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard.” When Azzi refuses to even look at her, Paige takes a step closer, reaching for her hand. “Can you just stop being so unselfish for once? Let me help you.”
“I don’t need you, Paige.” The wounded look in her best friend’s eyes makes Azzi correct herself. “I don’t need you to pity me.”
“You took care of me when I was injured last year! How is this any different?”
“God, you just don’t understand.”
Paige rests her hands on the counter. “I can’t do this. Not with you.“ She closes her eyes momentarily, and when she opens them Azzi expects her to storm out of the room. But instead, her eyes soften. “Can we just watch a movie or something? We don’t have to talk.”
Azzi falls silent.
“Do you want me to go? Because if you don’t want me here then I’ll leave.” Paige pauses. “But I want to be here. I want to be with you.”
“Okay,” Azzi relents. Paige bites back a smile, and Azzi rolls her eyes fondly.
Azzi lies down on the couch, curling herself into Paige’s side. The older girl’s hands slip under her shirt, moving across her back in a way that feels heavenly. Her eyes flutter shut, and she’s almost asleep when Paige’s phone rings and she slides out from beneath her, gently covering Azzi with the blanket before shutting herself in the other room.
She can barely make out the words, but she can hear from the softening of Paige’s tone and her giggling that she’s talking to Ella.
When Paige comes out, there’s hesitation before she walks over to Azzi on the couch. She hears the sound of Paige breathing heavily for a few moments before she feels a hand on her jaw, the brush of lips on her temple. “I love you,” she hears Paige murmur, so quiet she can barely catch it, before the door shuts and there’s silence.
••
“Azzi?”
Azzi picks up her cup of coffee. “Oh hey, Ella.”
Ella grins at her, the intensity of her smile a little disarming. “Thought that was you! Fancy running into you here.”
Azzi smiles politely.
“Well, hey, I know this is kind of an awkward time, but I’ve been meaning to ask you something.” Ella fidgets with her fingers.
A band of discomfort spreads across Azzi’s chest. “Go for it,” Azzi says hesitantly.
“Well, O know you and Paige have been friends for a while.” Ella blushes. “I just, I can’t help but ask - there’s nothing going on between you two right?”
Azzi is a little relieved when she opens her mouth to speak but Ella raises a hand to cut her off. She wasn’t sure what she would’ve said anyways. “I don’t wanna be that girl. I know how important you are to Paige. But she just talks about you sometimes - or even just looks at you and - and I just can’t help but wonder?”
God. “Ella. You don’t have anything to worry about. Me and Paige are just friends. That’s-” Azzi forced a smile. “That’s all we’ll ever be. Okay?” She doesn’t say that if it were up to me, it’d be different. She doesn’t say that it’s unfair how this girl has Paige already wrapped around her finger when I’ve been in love with Paige since I was 16. But she doesn’t.
Ella nods, clearly relieved. She squeezes Azzi’s arm. Azzi wants to tell her to take it off. “If you don’t mind,” Ella continues. “I have another favor to ask.” She takes a furtive look around before stepping closer. “A little bit of space would be nice,” she says under her breath.
“Space?”
Ella nods. “You know how new relationships can be. They’re kind of rocky. And besides, Paige has been stressed with leading the team and the shit going on with her family.”
“I know that.” Azzi’s voice is cold now. She shifts Ella’s hand off her.
Ella smiles again, and this time it doesn’t seem as sweet. “Paige cares about you. A lot. But it’s taking kind of a mental toll on her, balancing all of these things and you at once.” Her eyes flick to Azzi’s crutches.
“What are you saying?”
“I’m not saying you’re a burden. But I’m saying that Paige is always worrying about if you’ve eaten, how your knee is doing, and all that shit. Maybe giving Paige space would help her be, I don’t know, a little less stressed?”
When Azzi stares at her without a response, Ella steps back with a shrug. “I don’t mean any harm. I’m just looking out for my girlfriend.” Ella stresses the my, and Azzi doesn’t miss the way she eyes her as she says it.
She inhales slowly. “Okay.” And as much as she doesn’t want to believe Ella, how could she not? She sees how happy Paige is when she runs to her after games. Ella, as much as Azzi hates her now, gives Paige the support she needs. And she’s not wrong - this has been the most difficult season for the senior yet, having to lead a team of mostly injured players and underclassmen when no one believes in them. And the way Paige had left yesterday night, not even halfway through the movie….as much as Paige refused to admit it, she didn’t want to be tied down by Azzi. Fuck. Had I been hurting her this entire time?
“So…space?”
“I can do that.”
“Great! Thank you, Azzi. I knew you’d understand.” Ella flashes a smile before looking at the menu. “Do you think Paige prefers matcha or cold brew?”
Paige hates matcha. She thinks it tastes like grass.
“Definitely matcha.”
331 notes · View notes
choerrysjubiles · 1 month ago
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Teen Hearts Beating Faster, Faster
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pairing: virgin!wonbin x fem!reader
warning: jealous!bin :], jealous!bin confessing his feelings :D, smut, protected sex, premature ejaculation, aftercare, brief mention of food (not sexual)
wc: 3.7k
a/n: love u wonnie also the ryan in the fic is ryan ross hehehe I've been obsessively rewatching live in denver and I gotta write abt my bbygirl
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
Wonbin had a decent amount of patience.
He had the patience for when professors scolded him for the work they misgraded. Even after tests were graded wrong, he sat back and waited for them to realize the mistake. Sighing in relief as they changed his grade, knowing he was the correct one.
He had patience for long hours at their dance studio. When choreographers continuously scolded them and yelled even as their bodies grew tired and were close to dropping. When he would force his lips shut as he heard the same droning words being shouted at him and his teammates.
Even among his friends, Wonbin was patient. Waiting for them to cool down, realizing they were both loud and wrong in the argument. Realizing the solution, he let it slide, as they looked at him in remorse. Not wanting to make another show of something, Wonbin let it slide as they continued doing whatever started the argument.
Something he didn't have patience for was that stupid guy, Ryan.
Ryan, some lame guitarist from a band y/n's become obsessed with. It seemed that was all she could talk about. The second he heard that name, Wonbin scowled.
Ryan's playing here, Ryan's sent me some demos, Ryan's sent me tickets to see them here or there. Ryan this, Ryan that.
Wonbin didn't even hate the guy. He was a decent musician; he played guitar well, even better than what Wonbin could play. But something boiled in him when you mentioned his name.
He couldn't even be jealous, Ryan had a girlfriend and he knew you would never do that. You were friends with his girlfriend, knowing each other even before Ryan dated her. But the idea of someone occupying y/n's thoughts more than her own friend, Wonbin, upset him beyond relief.
Was it because he's older? In a band? Was is the sweaty guy pheromones getting to y/n? Was that why she's so obsessed with Ryan?
But Wonbin bit his tongue and stayed quiet. He always did, never wanting to upset you even when you laughed and assured him you had no obsession or feelings or Ryan.
And even now, watching them play their set in some vacant building, Wonbin felt his jealousy grow. The way your eyes lit up when Ryan sang adlibs. The way you clapped and cheered when they finished a song. When you sang along to the same adlibs and backing vocals as Ryan. That especially made him upset.
Wonbin stayed still, armed crosses with a slight frown as he tried to enjoy their concert. Only some time left, then he'll be out of the temple of Ryan.
When their set was done, Wonbin and you walked out. Walking around to see if there was any restaurant or diner to grab something to eat before going home. When you finally made your way to Wonbin's car to drive home, you could sense something was up.
There was tension in the air, something being unsaid but desperately needed to be discussed. His hands gripped the steering wheel tighter, his arms flexed more, his face was unusually tight.
"You seem upset." Your voice was soft, not wanting to upset Wonbin.
"I'm not upset, why would I be upset?" He said, a little too fast to be convincible.
"You've been like this a couple of times. I just, I just wanna know whats going on? If you're okay?"
Your eyes were soft while your brows felt furrowed, something was really bothering him and knowing Wonbin, he'd rather bite his tongue than bring anything up.
Wonbin took a deep breath in, collecting his thoughts. The air was tense, it was hard to breathe, the pressure building every second longer he took to speak.
"I'm jealous of Ryan." It felt like Wonbin's head was gonna implode.
"Of Ryan?" You repeated.
"Yes of Ryan." He says, a little harsher than he wanted. "He's cool, he's all you ever talk about-"
"All I ever talk about? Wonbin, what do you mean?"
He turns slightly, cheeks flushed as he looks at you.
"It's almost like every time we meet up there's something new about Ryan. I know he's your friend but so am I."
You carefully nodded your head.
"I'm just." He sighs, "I feel myself becoming obsessed with you, or something."
Oh?
You sat in silence, mouth agape.
"And always hearing about that Ryan guy just pisses me off. I know he's older and more experience and cooler than me, but-"
"He's not." You laughed.
Wonbin stared at you. His eyes were wide, hair disheveled as he tried calming himself down to listen to you.
"I'm sorry I upset you." You made sure to keep eye contact. "Genuinely. But he's not that cool. He's kind of a dick to his fans, he often isolates himself when he's overwhelmed. He doesn't have a great temper."
"He does?" Wonbin leans a little closer to You, amused smile on his face.
"He's a cool guy to hang around because I like his band and I can get cheap tickets from him. But there's nothing more than that."
You grabbed his hand.
"I'm sorry I put you through hell. I wouldn't have done all that if I'd have known how you felt. I'm sorry."
"Can I kiss you?" He blurts out.
You blinked for a moment, you went lightheaded for a second before leaning in to give Wonbin a chaste peck on his lips. His face flushed even harder than earlier, he was sure you could feel the warmth radiating from him. Detaching from each other, Wonbin let out a whine.
Hearing him, you moved to the side of his face and pressed a kiss the corner of his mouth.
"I've never kissed someone before." He confessed.
"Really?" You asked, your voice was more curious than it could be teasing or taunting.
"Can we kiss more?" His eyes were shiny, scared you'd say no to him.
"Can we go somewhere more comfortable?" You asked.
"Y-yes, of course."
Wonbin turned the car on with fumbling hands, reversing and making their way to your apartment. The drive and walk up was agonizing. Every light turned red, every crosswalk had people walking, even the parking garage at her complex was filled.
Walking and standing in the elevator was torturous. Wonbin kept his hands on you, be it your arm or hand, to ensure this was real and not some dream.
Walking into your home, you latched onto each other. Your hands went straight to his neck, holding his still as your deepened their kiss. His hands nervously held onto your back before dropping to your waist.
You backed him to the couch, dropping down as he carefully hovered over you. His eyes nervously looked around your body.
"Do you wanna touch me?" You asked Wonbin.
"Yes." He barely spoke above a whisper, round eyes staring at you.
"Where?" You pressed.
He looked over you, every spot his eyes landed lasted around a second before he found another spot he wanted to touch.
Grabbing his hand, "I would like it if you touched here."
You guided his hand to your breast. Wonbin's breath hitched as he laid his hand onto you, scooting a hair closer.
"Don't be shy, come here." You egged him on.
He followed orders, moving closer. His hand stayed on your breast as he moved his other hand to your shoulder.
"Can I- uhm."
"You can do whatever, Bin."
He looked at her, seeing the assurance in your eyes, before moving his hands to massage your breasts. Thumbs swiping and moving into the fabrics of your shirt and bra.
"Do you wanna take it off?" You asked. "I know wanna take your shirt off."
"Can I?" He asked.
"Of course."
He grabbed at the bottom hem of his shirt, sliding it off of his body before moving to your shirt. His eyes widened with every inch of skin exposing. You leaned back into the couch as he pulled your shirt off, letting him eye you as you sunk down.
"Do you wanna move this somewhere else? Before we get into more?"
"Can we? I mean, yes. I-I would like that." His nervousness was cute.
You grabbed his hand, leading Wonbin to your bedroom. The lights were dim, your nightstand's lamp lighting the room in soft yellow lighting. Wonbin looked around, shocked at how similar yet different your room looked. Walking him towards your bed, Wonbin moved his hand to your shoulder, thumb playing with your bra strap.
"Can you take it off?" She asked him.
"How?"
"Here." You grabbed his hand.
Moving his hand to wrap around your backside. Holding onto his pointer finger and thumb, you helps him pinch the clasps. Your bra fell down, one strap falling down your shoulder to expose your breast as Wonbin stared down at the newly exposed skin.
You threw your bra to the side as he stared at your breasts. His hands shook as you grabbed them, pulling them upwards to cover your soft, warm skin. He carefully squeezed them, not wanting to hurt you. Thumbs rolling along your nipples, his eyes shot up at you when you let out a low sigh.
"Did that feel good?" He asked, leaning closer to you.
"Very." you closed your eyes.
He continued kneading your breasts, seeing what made you moan and sigh and what led to no reaction. Continuing to roll his thumbs along your nipples, growing the confidence to flick them and drink up the sighs you let out.
"Can we kiss again?" You asked. "You have really soft lips."
"Y-yeah."
He leaned over, lips softly merging before you kissed him again. His hands wrapped around your waist as you kissed, your tongue licking his bottom lip. Opening his mouth, he tasted your tongue as it swiped along his.
Wonbin let out a low moan. The feeling of your skin, your tongue, your lips, it's all so much. He slid his hands down to your ass, feeling himself fall against your bed as you climbed on top of him.
Your core sat right on top of his bulge, hips unintentionally grinding against him as he let out a strained groan.
"I'm sorry." You said, cheeks flushed.
"It's okay."
He breathed, thinking of what to do.
"Can you, mm, teach me something?" He asked shyly.
"What?"
"I wanna eat you out. I've just, never, uhm."
You felt your core grow wetter. His flushed cheeks, eyes looking anywhere but you. You wanted to savor this moment, this vulnerability from him.
"Where do you want me?" You asked, voice full of desire.
"Huh?" He said, unsure of what you mean.
"Should I sit on your face? Or do you want me laying down? Should we, like, 69?"
Wonbin flushed at your words.
"Uhm. Maybe you, uh, laying down."
You nodded, removing your pants before moving to lay down. Your knees were decently far apart, wanting Wonbin to move them to see your panties as he would lean into your pussy.
He looked around nervously, "Can you, you know, tell me how to, um."
"Do you want to lay on the bed or kneel on the floor?"
"Maybe the floor." He dropped onto the floor, settling along the edge.
You scooted to the edge of the bed, knees spread to each side of Wonbin's wide shoulders. His wide, shiny eyes stared at the wet spot on your underwear, his hands resting on your knees.
You leaned back, hands grabbing his leading them to your waistband. He caught on to pull them down, dragging them off down your legs before tossing them to the side. He leaned in to your pussy, seeing how wet it was.
He gently brought his hand to your core, cupping your vulva and feeling how much slick was dripping out of you. Gasping, you felt how warm his hand was against you.
"I thought you were eating me out." You whined.
Wonbin chuckled before leaning in, stretching your thighs to allow his head in. He let your thighs rest on his shoulders, something he's sure he's seen in a porno or two.
He gave a small lick, hearing your breathing hitch. His tongue was sharp and pointed, like he catching as much of your precum as he could gather. Taking another lick, he tasted the depth of your cum. The slight saltiness and overwhelming sweet taste.
He couldn't quite tell what you tasted like, having nothing similar to your cum, ever. His cum was far saltier, musky, even. But this was different. Were all girls like this or just you?
You were enjoying this feeling, his hot tongue licking at every inch of your pussy as you laid there panting. You felt your hand inch towards him, grabbing onto his head to steady yourself.
He continued licking at you, getting drunk on the taste of your honey. Flattening his tongue as he lapped at you, unknowingly teasing your clit with a lack of stimulation.
"Binnie, please." You whined.
He lifted his head, slick dripping down his mouth, "What's wrong?"
"Lick my clit more. I'm going insane, Bin." Your head popped up to look at him.
You felt a wave of slick pour out of you when you looked down at him. Eyes blown out, mouth glistening with your cum, his hot breaths teasing your pussy.
"Up here?" A string of your arousal clung to his lips as his eyes shot to your clit before bringing his hand up to flick at it.
"Yes!" You gasped, thighs clenching together as you fell back onto the mattress.
Wonbin smiled as he went back in to eat you. Tongue stiffening to prod at your clit before slurping up the wetness dripping out of you. Every move he did he saw you twitch and squirm.
"Wait, fuck, yes! Right there, right there."
His confidence kept growing seeing you fall apart from him. Your back continuing to arch off of the bed, Wonbin continued licking at you, nose bumping into your clit as he felt you stiffen. A long drawn out moan escaping your lips as your pussy dripped your cum onto his tongue.
Pulling away, Wonbin looks up at you. Ragged breaths as you're still gripping the bedsheets. Your legs, still folded, are shaking as he rubs your thighs in an attempt to comfort and relax you.
"I thought you said you were a virgin."
"I am." He says shyly.
"You're either a liar or are too good at following directions." You laughed.
You laid there until your breath steadied. Wonbin crawled up the bed, sitting beside you. You were overwhelmed with how hard that orgasm felt, no man's been that good at eating pussy. Wonbin watched your breathing, how much air was sucked into your ribcage, the sheen of sweat along your breasts, how hard your nipples became as the air cooled.
Leaning up on your elbow, "Do you want me to help you with that?"
Y/n stared at his tight bulge.
"Can we have sex?" His eyes were wide, scared you'd say no.
"Yeah, of course we can."
His shoulders relaxed. Taking his pants and boxers off, Wonbin felt a little exposed. He's never been naked in front of anyone, looking over you're not even paying attention to his body. You're looking at his face, his cheeks? Somewhere, studying his reactions, maybe.
You lean over to your nightstand, opening the drawer to take out a loose condom, tossing it to Wonbin you ask if he knows how to put one on.
"No."
"Come here." You wave his over.
Wonbin crawls towards you, his hard dick standing tall as you begin to unwrap the foil.
"This might feel a little weird." You warn.
You roll the condom down his length, the cold lube made Wonbin hiss. Fully covered, you grab onto the tip and pull it upwards, suctioning it onto him.
"What position would you like?"
"Can you ride me?"
You blinked, surprised at his request.
"Sure, get comfortable." You motion to your bed.
"I'm sorry, I should be-"
"No way, this is your first time, I gotta treat my baby right."
Wonbin felt his heart skip when you called him her baby. He moved to lay down, you pushed some pillows together to give him better cushioning as well as a better new.
You straddled his lap before teasing his tip along your folds, Wonbin's hands grabbed at your hips, rubbing and squeezing the flesh as you got into position.
Slowly dropping down onto him, Wonbin began squeezing you, a soft moan escaping him as his eyes were glued to your pussy. He was amazed at how you felt: soft, tight walls clinging around him as you sank lower and lower. He didn't know how deep your womb could get but he was an almost perfect fit.
Your walls clung around him as you sunk lower. Dropping into his lap, you saw Wonbin wide-eyed and panting.
"Are you okay?" You leaned in, worried about him.
"You're so fucking tight."
You smiled, leaning in to kiss his forehead. He craned his head to kiss your lips, sitting up more to continue kissing you.
"Can I move?" You asked, mouth moving to his cheek and jawbone.
"Yeah." He was breathless.
You left a wet kiss onto his jugular as you lifted yourself and pushed back down.
"Shit." He moaned, grabbing your hair to kiss you. His wet tongue began licking the inside of your mouth.
Bouncing more, his grip tightened as he let out a slew of moans. You felt different, there was something insatiable about being on top of Wonbin. Not just that you two were friends, but he was falling apart so soon.
"Wait, fuck, slow down." He begged.
As you were going to plant yourself down, Wonbin's face tightened. He let out a strangled moan, teeth biting his lip to stop himself. Looking at your face, his eyes became teary as his breathing became ragged.
"Fuck."
"I'm so sorry." You said.
"You're," He breathed, "you're fine, it's me who-"
You pulled off of him, gaining a strained groan from Wonbin.
He looked over to this side, "This is embarrassing."
"It happens to everyone."
"Everyone?"
"Mostly guys, but you can't help that."
Wonbin took the condom off, tying it and tossing it in your trash bin.
"Can i still make you cum?" He looked at you shyly.
"Do you wanna?"
"Yeah."
"Sure, you can finger me. How do you want me?"
Wonbin sat up on his knees, wondering where they could move.
"Can I finger you, like, doggy style?" He asked shyly.
Oh?
"Yeah." Your cheeks felt warm hearing such a lewd answer.
You tucked some pillows under you as you bent onto them, ass on display for Wonbin. You felt a shiver run down your body as his hands rubbed your hip, something exciting about not knowing his next move. His hand swiped down to your ass.
He was fascinated with your body, seeing what parts were plump and fleshy and which ones weren't. His hands stroked along your ass, thumb prodding at your core to feel how wet you were. Wonbin noticed the arousal dripping down your thigh as he carefully pushed his pointer finger in.
"Mmm." You moaned.
Wonbin continued thrusting his finger in and out, feeling around your walls as he moved. Your legs began shaking a little, the sense deprivation was really getting to you.
As Wonbin inserted another finger, his free hand snuck by your hip to rub your clit, feeling the erect nub as he stimulated you.
"Wonbin, ahh." You moaned. "Mmm, can you go harder?"
"Harder?"
"Please."
He began pumping his fingers in and out, carefully tapping your clit as he fingered you.
"Fuck you're making my dick hard again."
"Put it in." You moaned.
Wonbin tore his hands away, quickly getting into your drawer to grab another condom. He tried remembering what you showed him as he tore the foil and rolled it on. He remembered how your hands looked at he pulled the tip lightly, suctioning it on.
Standing on his knees, he aligned himself with your core, take a breath as he was still sensitive from earlier.
Pushing in, he felt his hips begin bucking in and out.
Aligned at her core, Wonbin inserted himself. Still so sensitive from his orgasm earlier.
"Fuck, you're even tighter."
"Rub my clit, Binnie."
He followed orders and messily rubbed your clit, heryourwalls beginning to clench even tighter around him. His hips thrusting harshly into you, so much he almost slipped out.
"Yes, yes, fuck! Wonbin!"
His hips continued thrusting as he felt you tighten around him with a loud moan. The sensation was too much as he felt himself cum in the condom. His large hands wrapped around your hips tightly as emptied himself.
He could barely pull himself out, the feeling so painful and pleasureful. Carefully, after some breaths, Wonbin pulled out, pulling the condom off before dumping it into your trash can, again.
He felt his body collapse next to you as you were adjusting to lay on your back.
"So." You were still panting. "Was that a good first time?" You had a wide smile, looking over at Wonbin.
"Yeah, it was memorable, at the least."
You laughed, turning on your side to look at him.
"Did you want me to help clean you up?" She asked, grabbing his hand.
"Not now, I wanna relax for a moment."
"Yeah." You said, grabbing at one of your blankets to cover him.
"Thank you," He said, "your apartment is really cold."
"This is not the pillow talk I was expecting, Bin."
He laughed, scooting closer to keep warm. Laying together, they mostly held each other while only talking sparingly.
"Here." You said, leaning over to your nightstand.
You opened your drawer to take out a baby wipe.
"Baby wipes?"
"For clean up." You defended yourself.
"You clean up with baby wipes?"
"You're expected me to hand you some rough wash cloth as a cum rag? No, they're great for cleaning up after sex."
You helped him clean himself, wiping some dried cum off of his face, grabbing another for his dick.
"Too cold!" He yelped.
"You're being a baby." You laughed.
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avaf00rd · 9 months ago
Text
Behind the scenes
Leah Williamson x matildas!reader
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Tiny little blurb I wrote last minute as I rewatched the show
“Hello you” you grinned as you opened the front door, a smiley Leah behind it with her large suitcase and England hoodie on. The Disney plus camera crew behind you. Pretending as if Leah had just gotten home from England camp and you hadn’t seen her yet. Well she had, about an hour ago though.
You grabbed the suitcase from her hand, and pulled her in from her other free wrist, placing a short kiss on her lips and hugging her tight. “How was it?” You asked excitedly whilst you both made your way to your living room.
“Yeah really good, great to see everyone” your girlfriend explained to you leaning against the large book case near your couch. “Plane was quicker than I thought though, only like an hour and a half”
The camera still following both of you “oh yeah wow that’s not bad at all”
“Suppose I had it a bit better than you travel wise” she chuckled, folding her arms now. Nothing to your 20 hours of travel to and from Australia for your own international camp.
“Certainly” you laughed back with Leah.
“Ladies that was actually really great for a first take so we probably won’t need to do that again. We’ll now just get you both on the couch so we can talk to you both” one of the members of the camera said, holding a clip board and directing his crew to your living room
Leah sat down on the shared couch with you following suit behind. Plopping down next to your girlfriend as she put an arm around you, legs intertwined at the end of the couch.
“You guys wanna stay like this for the clips?-“
“Yes” you nodded fast, as people in the room laughed at your certainty.
“Leah can you tell me a bit about y/n. Like how she is as a person but also a teammate?” The same man asked from behind the camera. They would get her answers and these shots for the docu-series.
It be out on Disney plus just months before the World Cup begins, to help Australia get more of an insight into their team and the players
Leah looked down at you, as you shot her a smile before she started “y/n is such a hard worker. I’ve never met anyone like her. Very funny person to have a laugh with…or laugh at” she nodded
You rolled your eyes “saw that coming”
Leah did one of her wide smiles where her cheeks would go so high and her nose would scrunch up which made you melt completely, “so leading onto that she’s a bit clumsy”
“Not all the time” you mumbled
“Everyone at Arsenal calls her the princess though. Because she’s just the sweetheart of the team, who cares about her team so so much and we get to see that every day here in London” you smiled to yourself as you looked down at the couch while Leah spoke about you to the cameras
“Do you just completely hate this?” Leah laughed
“No keep going” you nodded, making her laugh. Leah often got the sense you got all flustered and embarrassed when she spoke about you so well, to other people when you are in the room.
“Y/n what’s it like getting to train each day and play games with your partner?” The producer asked me
“Yeah I’m extremely blessed, I would say, to be able to basically spend every hour of the day with her. And to put on the Arsenal badge and play for our fans with my favourite person is a bit of a win each weekend for me”
“We’re assuming you two meet through Arsenal?” He asked
“Yeah we met at Arsenal when I transferred back in 2019. And then I went on loan to Barca for a season, but then…yeah I came back-“
“And then y/n asked me out!” Leah cut you off with a grin
“Um okay it was kind of you” you looked up at her with a shake of your head.
“Kinda both of us in a way?” Leah shrugged to camera. Which you just shook your head, to said camera.
“They aren’t gonna understand that” you pointed with both arms to the camera, you and Leah now giggling. You both said a few more things they had asked you before the filming stopped.
“Thanks girls! We will see you tomorrow afternoon for more shots, have a great night, hope we didn’t take up too much of your time” a different lady had said now, as she helped her crew pack up some small equipment.
“Not at all!”
————————————————————————
Being one of the few people in your Matilda’s squad who had been apart of the team for over 11 years, you had been in quite a few scenes in the docu-series. Alongside Steph Catley, Sam Kerr, Caitlin Foord, and more. You got the opportunity to talk about your family’s background in the sport and growing up with the Matilda’s, as well as preparations to win the World Cup.
This morning you had done some scenes at the training centre for your club, along with Cait and Steph as you all talked about playing for Arsenal.
The cameras were with you once again, as Now Leah sat on a small picnic blanket in your local park, late afternoon, where you would often bring your dog, Denny, you were trying to get him to run with the ball at his fist like he was about to shoot.
Leah threw her head back laughing hysterically as you fell over your feet once again, tripping on your own dog, in another attempt to get him to play football. “It’s not going to work” she shouted
“He’ll do it Leah just wait!” You shouted back laughing as you kept trying. When you made it back to the picnic blanket, you did what you were asked to do by the crew which was talk about playing each other in the World Cup.
“I always say it but I really really hope both our teams make it to the final, but I don’t think I could handle versing you in a heated game like that”
“You do it all the time though. We’ve had so many heated games against each other”
“Yeah but a World Cup final though…Hopefully one of us will be out by then” Leah shrugged, looking at you from her position on the rug with her knees tucked to her chest
“Hopefully England” you shrugged back
“No I was joking. I hope both teams are” she laughed once again.
“I think the friendly coming up against England just before the World Cup should be good.” You said as Leah nodded “Most players who will be in the World Cup squad should hopefully be in there so we get a full feel of not just the other team but hopefully our own squads”
“Yeah for sure” Leah said
“I can sense you two have a small rivalry in your own house hold” someone’s behind the camera commented
“Mm I don’t know” Leah grinned as you just laughed
“You know it’s true”
———————————
I’m pretty negative about fics like these that I write. Cause I hate this. But honestly it’s due to some of the recent think about my writing my inbox🫠🫠
So please. If you’re not a fan of it, click out of it!
Luv u all
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ohbabydollie · 10 months ago
Note
(celeb s/o anon here) but i would totally ride ted while he watched the animated barbie movies and got a bit mad because he NEEDS to do research and he WON’T be rewatching anything lmaoo
he’s absolutely bored sitting there and watching those stupid movies that don’t make any sense, he’s absolutely bored out of his mind until you walk in. you happily sit down next to him when you realize he’s watching your favorite barbie movie.
he pulls you into his lap, draping a blanket over the both of you, happily cuddling until a few movies later you realize he’s hard.
before you know it you’re slowly taking his long cock, feeling every vein and ridge inside of you as you bottom out. you try to stay focused on the movie but the way ted’s cock is hitting your g spot perfectly and just resting there, the occasional movement of his hips when he readjusts himself, his arms wrapped around your waist.
you couldn’t help yourself but just move a little, letting out a soft moan.
“bunny, stop it” he warns
“not doing anything” you mutter back, now stopping, your walls squeezing his cock from the need for friction.
so you sit there again, trying to ignore it, but it’s like ted is doing it on purpose, moving just enough to be resting his thick head on the spongy spot inside you.
he wouldn’t mind if you were just getting comfy, would he?
so you lifted your self from his cock “adjusting” yourself with a few silent moans before sitting back down at a different angle, this time ted was a little deeper.
“thought i told you to stop it”
“im just getting cozy”
“well this is your last warning, im not gonna rewatch these stupid movies because you wanna be a fucking tease” ted says grabbing your hips as you smile
“m’kay”
somehow a movie later you find yourself aching for relief, just wanting to bounce on ted’s cock, but you can’t…
well it wouldn’t do any harm if he didn’t notice
you gave an experimental movement that ted didn’t seem to notice and another until you were softly moving on his cock, but what you didn’t take in account were the soft noises coming from you
soft sighs and shaky breaths, your hip’s subconsciously moving faster until you feel a slap to your thigh
“honey, what did i say?” ted asks now stopping you, you turn to look at him innocently
“don’t remember”
he sighs, lifting you off his cock and before you can get away he slams you down, forcing a loud cry from you and feeling him angle his hips to go impossibly deeper into you.
“i’m not gonna rewatch these movies because you wanna be a fuckin tease, now sit there and keep my cock warm” he demands in a deep voice as he wraps his arms around your waist and holds you there tightly
now you have to sit patiently
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Text
Every Fucking Time
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Summary: You want to help Dean, but he knows you can't.
Warnings/Explicit 18+: Lots of angst! Smut! Unprotected PinV sex. Slightly rough sex. Dean being an asshole. Dean being a broken boy. Hurt/comfort.
Pairings: Dean x Reader (You)
Word Count: 2,737
A/N: So, I just rewatched 13x18, Bring 'Em Back Alive, and the scene at the end never fails to break my heart. I just wanna make Dean feel better! 😫 But it got me thinking about how unlikely Dean would be to accept that help, and how his anger might manifest. Anyway, this is what spilled out of my brain as a result.
A/N 2: The title is a reference to Dean's line, "Every time we get close, it all falls apart. Every frickin' time." I have changed it to the non-network TV version because we all KNOW that's actually what Dean said.
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You just wanted to help. You needed to help. You needed to make it better for him. 
Dean had slipped back home through the rift barely an hour earlier, talking about the apocalypse world Charlie and how he'd left her and Ketch behind, promising he would come back with reinforcements.
Then you, Cas and Sam had given him the bad news; no one could go back, you couldn’t send reinforcements. Gabriel was gone, taking all his archangel grace with him.
“So if it’s gone, then that means that we can’t open that door again. If we can’t open the door, then I shoulda never come back!” He'd shouted.
He'd tried to tamp down the rage and anger that simmered just behind his forced calm. Nevertheless, it exploded out of him making you all jump.
“Son of a bitch!” He'd screamed, sending books and papers crashing to the ground as he swept them from the table. “Every time!”
You could feel his frustration and pain like it was your own as his voice dropped, defeated and broken for the millionth time. “Every time we get close, it always falls apart…every fuckin’ time.”
When he walked away, looking as though the weight of the world was once again on his shoulders, you’d tried to follow after him, but Sam had grabbed your arm gently, holding you back.
“Leave him for now, Y/N. He needs time.”
You should have listened to Sam, but you could feel Dean’s pain like a lance in your side and you were desperate to heal him. So less than an hour later, you went looking for him. But he wasn’t in his room, or the Dean cave. The kitchen was empty and so was the garage. 
You finally found him in the infirmary. He was sitting on one of the beds, sewing together a nasty looking bullet wound.
“Dean!” You called out worriedly as you rushed down the steps. He glanced up at you but then went back to stitching himself up. “Why didn’t you tell us you’d been shot?” You reprimanded him.
He shrugged his unwounded shoulder. “No big deal. Ketch patched me up on the go, just didn’t have time to sew it up properly.”
You watched him silently for a moment, wincing every time the needle pierced his inflamed skin. He’d taken his shirt off so he could tend to his wound, and you couldn’t help but take an inventory of his other numerous scars. Jagged knife cuts, more round bullet holes, and a few waxy looking old burns, all marred his otherwise perfect, lightly freckled torso.
Some of the scars were very faded, barely noticeable, while others were newer; some of them were still red and angry looking. They were a patchwork of pain - a tapestry of more than thirty-five years of hunting, fighting, falling, getting up, and fighting again. 
It made you exhausted just to see it; it made your bones ache.
You stepped a little closer to him, but he kept you at arm’s length with an aura of silent, repressed anger that you could practically see pulsing off of him.
You wanted to help him so badly.
“Dean, I’m so sorry.”
He shook his head, not looking up from his work. “No, let’s not. I don’t wanna talk about it.”
You let out a small sigh. Of course you don’t. You thought with a flash of frustration.
You were quiet another minute as he finished the last few stitches. Then you smiled a little, trying a different tactic. “So, there was a Charlie over there? That’s amazing. What was she like? Was she the same as our Charlie?”
Dean didn’t answer right away. He snipped the thread he was using and tossed the small silver scissors back into the first aid kit he had open on the bed beside him. He took some rubbing alcohol and poured it onto a gauze pad, holding it to his wound and sucking in a breath through gritted teeth before answering.
“Yeah sure, she was like our Charlie.” His voice was a growl of pain. “She was a badass, determined to fight injustice, sticking up for her friends, risking her life for them. And yeah, just like our Charlie, I left her on her own to be butchered.”
Tears pricked your eyes. “Dean that’s not true…you didn’t-”
“Seriously, Y/N. Just fucking don’t.”
You were silenced again, watching him clean up and toss the bloody bandages into the trash as he stood up from the bed. He reached for his flannel and tried to put it on, slightly hampered by his newly bandaged shoulder. You stepped forward to help him with it, and when it was on, but still unbuttoned, you slid your hands inside, down over his ribs.
You kissed his chest gently, and felt him twitch slightly. 
“Y/N.” He said quietly and you could hear the warning in his tone. 
You knew he was in a bad place, and the two of you had only recently begun to move your relationship out of friendship and into something more, so sex was still new between you. But you felt the overwhelming, screaming need to help him, to hold him close and let him feel your love shine through. You’d been in love with him for a long time, but you’d never told him. You suspected he didn’t love you back, though you hoped he might someday.
For now, though, you’d settle for being a soft place to land, if he’d just let you.
“Dean.” You said softly, kissing his chest again. “Let me help you.”
He pushed you back and turned away. “I don’t need help.”
You persisted, wrapping your arms around his waist from behind. “We all need help from time to time, Dean.”
“Y/N!” He said again, louder this time, his earlier anger resurfacing. “I told you, I’m fine. Just drop it.”
But you couldn’t. You wanted to help him, whether he accepted it or not.
You moved around him, so you stood in front of him again. ���Dean, you’re not fine. I just wanna help you.”
Dean scoffed. “Well you can’t fucking help me, Y/N. You can’t make it better.”
“I could try.” You cupped his cheek, but he pulled it out of your grasp, turning his head. You stood on tiptoe to try and kiss him. “Let me try, Dean. Let me try to help you.”
Dean grabbed your wrists from around his neck, glaring down at you, eyes blazing. “You fucking can’t, do you not hear me? You can’t help me, no one can help me! Because all I do is fuck up; all I do is leave my friends and family to die. And fucking you isn’t gonna change that; unless you have some kind of magical cunt that can open portals to another dimension, you can’t fucking help me!”
You felt your stomach drop, and an immediate ache started, high in your gut, clenching your insides and making you feel short of breath. You stepped back from Dean and swallowed convulsively, trying not to let go of the tears that clogged your throat. But it was a losing battle and they were soon coursing down your cheeks.
You nodded slightly. “K, yeah.” You didn’t know what else to say, turning away just as remorse began dawning in Dean’s emerald eyes. “Sam was right…I shouldn’t have come.”
You took off, bounding up the stairs as Dean called out to you. You ignored him, desperate to get away before you collapsed completely. 
You heard Dean following you, chasing you down the bunker hallway and you sprinted away. You got to your room just in time to slam the door and lock it just as Dean skidded to a halt outside.
He banged on the door, but you just moved over to your desk, dropping into the chair and swiping at your tears over and over, unable to make them stop.
“Y/N, come on! Open the door. Look, I didn’t mean that, okay? I just...just let me in.” He banged again. When you wouldn’t open it, he just kept banging. Finally he yelled at you through the wood.  “You know, I can just break down the fucking door! Let me in!”
He slammed his hammer like fist against the door again, rattling it in its frame. You jumped up and ripped open the door just as he was about to start pounding again. So his fist was raised and his features were twisted in a snarl as you looked up at him. But you were calm, even though tears still leaked from your eyes.
“Enough.” You said quietly. “Look, I shouldn’t have kept bugging you, you made it very clear you didn’t want me there and that I couldn’t be of any help. So, it’s fine. I’ll leave you alone now, and you can please stop raging at me and trying to smash down my door.”
You swallowed tightly and then nodded at him. “Goodnight.”
You closed your door softly and walked back to slump onto the end of your bed. You dashed your tears away as quickly as they fell, trying to dash away Dean’s angry words too, but failing miserably. 
After nearly half an hour your tears finally dried up and you decided to get ready for bed, sadness and hurt making you slow and sluggish. As you pulled your big sleep shirt on over your head, however, a noise caught your attention just outside your door. 
You walked softly to the door in your bare feet, cracking it open an inch to look out into the hallway. What you saw made brand new tears cloud your vision.
Dean was sitting across from your door, his back against the wall. His knees were bent slightly with his elbows resting there and his feet planted on the floor. His eyes were shut, his head leaning back against the wall with tears streaming silently down his cheeks. Or almost silently. As you watched, his face spasmed with pain and his breath seemed to catch in his throat, making the muffled sound you’d heard; it sounded like his pain was choking him.
You opened the door wider and Dean sensed you, his eyes springing open. At first it seemed like he might bolt, but then he shook his head as he stared at you. “Baby, I’m so sorry.” His voice was a harsh whisper. “I swear to god, I didn’t mean to hurt you like that. I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with me.”
He thumped his head back against the wall twice. “I just break things. Everything.” He punctuated the word by slamming his elbow back into the wall as well, hard enough that you were worried he’d break the bone.
You hurried forward to kneel on the floor in front of him, squeezing in between his knees. You pulled his hands into yours as you tried to reassure him. “Dean, that isn’t true. You don’t break everything; you fix things, save things. It’s in your DNA to try to right all the wrongs in the world, but sometimes you just can’t.”
He stared at you intently and once again you found yourself desperate to try to ease the bottomless ache you could see in his mossy green eyes.
His voice was barely a whisper as he reached out to run his thumb across your cheekbone. “Did I break us?”
You took a deep breath. “Your words hurt me.” He closed his eyes and nodded. “But…”
You were quiet a moment before deciding it was worth taking a chance, so you just said it. “But I love you, and my love doesn’t break that easily, even if my heart does.”
You took his hand from your cheek and held it against your chest, over your heart. “Not ever. No matter what the future holds, my love is unbreakable, even when you try to smash it to pieces with both hands.”
Dean’s expression was closed off, and you couldn’t see through it to his thoughts. After a moment he shook his head. “Don’t love me, sweetheart. I can’t…I can’t protect you if you love me. Something will come and take you from me - use you to hurt me somehow.” He closed his eyes again and repeated his words from earlier in the evening. 
“Every time I get close, it always falls apart.” He opened his eyes slowly and stared intently into your soul. “Every fucking time.”
He gazed at you for a long time, and you let him, hoping he could see that you weren't afraid to love him, and you weren't going to be scared away.
Suddenly he reached out to yank you into his lap and slam his mouth down on yours. You gasped into the kiss and then whimpered as he clutched you tight to him.
He pulled away from you, breathing harshly. “Am I forgiven? Because I was such a liar. I do need you.” He dipped his head to nip at your pulse point and flick his tongue against your salty skin. “I need you so fucking bad.”
You nodded, flushed and aching for his touch. “You’re forgiven.”
He crushed your lips with his once again, standing up without letting you out of his arms. He pushed you backwards through your bedroom door and closed it with a soft click, as he yanked your t-shirt off over your head, getting you naked in one quick motion.
You pushed his open flannel down his arms, being careful not to aggravate his newest injury. You fumbled with the button on his jeans for a moment, hands trembling, as he palmed your breast and squeezed, pressing his hard, blunt fingertips into your yielding flesh.
You threw your head back as he pulled your nipple into his mouth and bit it gently. You sank your hands into his short hair, tugging sharply and moaning loudly. He pulled away, just far enough that he could spin you around to face the wall. With a hand against your upper back, he bent you over slightly and lifted your arms, so that you braced them against the brick.
Then he raised your right leg, wrapping his forearm over top of it and spreading you open. You felt the knuckles of his other hand brush over your dripping wet core as he unbuttoned his jeans. Seconds later, you felt his tip pressing against your entrance and then you let out a scream of pleasure as he slammed into you hard and fast.
As he fucked up into you, he pulled you open even wider, reaching down with his free hand to rub circles into your clit with his calloused fingertips.
Eventually he dropped your leg, and pushed your feet apart while he pulled your hips back towards him. He never faltered or slowed his pace, just manhandling you into the positions he wanted.
You were bent at a ninety degree angle now, hands still braced against the wall, with your head hanging between them as Dean continued to pound into you so deep that he was almost lifting you off the floor with each thrust. 
He clamped his hand on the back of your neck, using it as leverage to piston his hips forward like a jackhammer. He tilted your pelvis forward slightly and suddenly he was perfectly, relentlessly hitting your g-spot over and over until you were screaming out his name and crashing into a hard wall of pleasure. You shook with your climax, but Dean didn’t stop, riding you through your first orgasm and into several more.
Your throat was hoarse from shouts of pleasure before Dean finally cursed loudly, shouting your name and surging into your body. With one last driving push,  you could feel him spurting into you hot and thick. He rocked his body against yours a few more times as his cock continued to twitch inside you.
Finally he stilled, both of you breathing harshly now, bodies slick with sweat. He laid his chest against your back, his arm still wrapped around your waist, keeping you close, keeping himself locked inside your slick warmth.
“Y/N.” You could hear the thick emotions even in his soft whisper. “You know, you save me. Every time I think I can’t recover, every time I think I won’t get back up. You make me think I can. You tell me I will.” 
He paused and his voice was velvety and warm as he breathed out across your skin. “You save me.” He kissed your shoulder gently. “Every fucking time.”
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Jensen RPF and Any/All Characters:
@lyarr24
@lacilou
@deans-spinster-witch
@globetrotter28
@suckitands33
@alwaystiredandconfused
@evznackles
@jackles010378
@impala67rollingthroughtown
@krazykelly
@candy-coated-misery0731
@envyaurora95
@spnwoman
@deans-baby-momma
@luvr4miya
@arcannaa
@viviwatchestv
@winharry
@ladysparkles78
@kr804573
Dean Fics Only:
@roonthelittlespoon920
@slamminmine
@zepskies
@safiyas-world
@aylacavebear
@waywardcheshire
Any/All Fics Regardless of Character or Fandom:
@kazsrm67
@slut-for-evans-stan
@sexyvixen7
@nancymcl
@hobby27
Everything Incl. Fan Edits:
@k-slla
@leigh70
@eevvvaa
@kickingitwithkirk
@foxyjwls007
@notinthislife50
@roseblue373
@mishkatelwarriorgoddess
@avanatural
@mrsjenniferwinchester
@all-alone-he-turns-to-stone
@deangirl96
@stoneyggirl2
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king-crawler · 5 months ago
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HEY HI HELLO
Sorry for the random message here In the asks, it's ok if you don't see this or answer it since you probably got a lot already and I understand if you don't see this!/gen
But first of all, I just wanna say
I CANT BELIEVE I HAVENT WATCHED YOUR ANALYSIS VIDEO SOONER IM SO FUCKING LATE MAN
It's so well done and so fucking funny, I was literally smiling and cackling through the whole thing, it's shocking how similar our humor is
NOT TO MENTION THE END SCENE AREE YOU KIDDING HOW DID YOU MATCH THE LYRICS SO PERFECTLY TO THE FUCKING LORE ITS INCREDIBLE 😭💜/GEN, POS
It's insane how much dedication is put into it, let alone singlehandedly feeding turbo fans as myself
Genuinely thought it's so nice seeing more content for a hyperfixation I've had since 2012, and the fandom coming back along with this video Genuinely brings me so much joy as someone who's loved this movie since I was a kid
Sorry for the ramble but genuinely thank you for making that video, I can't wait to see what other stuff you do, wreck it ralph or not I WILL be tuning in/gen, pos
Okay second of all
The main reason why I'm sending this is because of sometning I noticed while rewatching a scene in the movie
Now, this might be me over analyzing as I usually do but it feels TOO. OBVIOUS.
SO
IN the kart bakery scene where vanellope and ralph go to bake a kart, they obviously make their way into the building and into the main room
You see all the Karts of course, and It pans to the one vanellope chooses
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Which, at first glance you wouldn't really pay too much attention, especially when watching it for the first time, she's just picking the model she likes
..but looking back at the scene
Vanellope's kart model, how it was supposed to look, looks very
Familiar
Because the kart she chose..
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...is a red and white kart
With stripes down the middle, with a very similar shape to a..certain persons kart. Now this might just be nothing, it's probably just like I said, and over analysis on my part
But the kart the chose looks WAY too similar to turbo's, not to mention the stripe is down the middle, just like turbo's car on the cabinet art of him
And vanellope could've chosen ANY kart
But it was that specific kart she chose, out of any of the karts
Not to mention in some of vanellope's concept art...
(Art made by Lorelay Bove)
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..Vanellope's concept design and turbos designs strike SCARILY uncanny resemblances to each others designs
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From the helmet and colors
All the way down to her GOGGLES having the SAME. YELLOW. TINT. that candy's have in the movie, which have the same effect here. There's no way that this didn't have the intent to mirror turbo purposefully
So with that in mind, the kart vanellope chose in the kart bakery scene being turbo foreshadowing, wouldn't be too out of place, nor would it be too far off
Turbo's foreshadowing was always prominent, even in the smallest details you wouldn't focus on, just like he's infecting this world as a virus, little by little, everywhere. You. Turn.
Aaaand that's basically all I have to really say
Sorry for the long ramble, I've been thinking of submitting this for awhile now, especially after I told a friend about this and they mentioned that this should be submitted to you
So I decided to go ahead and just do it, no matter how wild my comparisons might sound-
Anyways, I hope you have a good day, night, or what time it may be, and keep being awesome! I can't wait to hear back if you see this! Bye-bye! ❤️🏎🏆
P.s
I've been quoting these since I watched the video and haven't stopped
Thanks for destroying my humor even more-/pos
Okay bye bye now-
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-skitters away-
NO YOU'RE SO FUCKING RIGHT OH MY GOD VANELLOPE WAS ALWAYS A TURBO PARALLEL??? CHAT IS THIS TRUE. IVE NEVER SEEN THAT CONCEPT ART OF HER TEEHEE THANKS FOR SHARING
also God. This is 99% just a coincidence with zero merit because its such a common gesture- but Ralph and Vanellope doing their thumbs up.. maybe Turbo parallels ?? and like the EXACT same poses too:
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Vanellope having one hand on the steering wheel and the other doing a thumbs up while facing the camera.
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Ralph hunched over doing the double thumbs up with the visor tinting his face yellow. EXCUSE ME HMMM?? WHAT THE FUCK??
NOW COULD I BE CHERRY PICKING? PERHAPS. but when Turbo has barely a minute of screentime, there's not a lot i can pick from, and things SURE ARE LINING UP... (I'm cherry picking)
SO SHHHHHH... ❤️❤️❤️❤️ LET ME HAVE MY LITTLE CONSPIRASCY
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ilovereadingandstuff · 6 months ago
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Yo, dear friend, wanna know what definitely sold me on watching Link Click? wanna know what was the scene which was the cherry on top of the cake that finished convincing me watching this show with which now i'm obssessed with? what also sold me completely on shipping shiguang with my whole heart?
THIS moment right here...from the first episode on season 1.
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"...you're up."
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MAN, THE WAY THIS SCENE SQUEEZED MY HEART!!??
The way that Cheng Xiaoshi woke up hurting by the mix of Emma's memories of her parents alongside his, in addition of the mingling of his mouring feelings over the disappearance of his parenst AND Emma's troubled feelings of insatisfaction, forced to be separated of her parents but at least they're alive and her horrible life-situation...
and when he was just starting to process his thoughts and waking up from the fatigue he had for the exhausting day...Lu talks to him.
Lu Guang WAS AWAKE...or at least sensed when Cheng Xiaoshi woke up and was struggling or both...and asked what's up...
aaaand, when Xiaoshi explains his ache over his dream, starts to roll his eyes, rolling on bed for discomfort, getting lost in thoughts over his sadness...Lu Guang gasps...or at least makes a tiny little sound, like when realizing something...AND THEN HE METAPHORICALLY TOUCHES CHENG XIAOSHI'S SHOULDER!!!! in a way to comfort or contain him, soothing his pain, trying to divert his mind and make him go back to sleep...
FUCK!! I love it.
I LOOOOOOOVEEE IT
The way those last frames LOOK INSANE to me, like, as if Lu Guang is crossing spacetime to reach for Cheng Xiaoshi, physically connecting two point of the same timeline to just cross bounds and comfort him...
(and with season 2 ending...DAMN this becomes even more beautifull as it could be possible)
Holy shit man, I can't get over this scene. Really.
You get what I mean???! You understand why I lost my mind right here?!?!
The way this scene shows the emotional support and intimacy these two hold for each other.
Lu Guang reaching for Cheng Xiaoshi to calm him, understanding his overwhelming feelings, the way he sees Cheng Xiaoshi's pain in his empathy for Emma's situation (that he is currently experiencing himself in flesh and blood) and the mix with his emotionally-driven instincs...Also telling him to focus, to not think about it for his own good. Not devaluing his feelings, but for him to not wheel on them more than neccessary...
So, yeah, that's what sold me for real. Blown my mind truly, and completely convinced me that this show was my favorite one (as it truly is cuz GOD IT'S SOOO GOOD)
Also, doing a rewatch, damn they're so beautiful together. like, sorry, if you expect me to not ship them...then do not do this.
How Lu Guang is so understanding, firm in his position but never rude to Cheng. Somehow copes with Xiaoshi's childish attitudes...but then, in comparison to anyone else, it's such a huge contrast!! how Lu Guang validates him so much, supports him, understands him...never pushing, but never going away.
Lu Guang is truly a masterpiece of character, just as Cheng Xiaoshi is. And I couldn't be happier for this show to exist.
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