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watchmegetobsessed · 4 years ago

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Waiting for you - Harry Styles

❄️ FANFICmas 2020 ❄️

Read more about FANFICmas here!

i wrote it over like a month ago, but kept it for today, i hope yall will like it! it’s a cute bestfriends to lovers fic, so yeah... happy holidays, hope you are having an amazing time!

word count: 13k

masterlist

Harry Styles has been a household name around your home, but not for the reason many would think. While for the rest of the world he was the famous singer, former member of One Direction and recent solo artist, the guy who performs at the biggest arenas, wins awards and sings his heart out through the radio, for you and your mom he was the goofy, curly haired boy who lived across the street with his mum, sister and stepdad.

You still remember all too clear the first time you met him. You and your mum just moved into your new home after the nasty divorce of your parents, ready to start a new life. You’ve barely turned twelve, it was quite the awkward stage of your teenage years, you were still trying to find yourself on the rocky road of growing up. Moving to a whole new town and switching schools were terrifying and you had quite a few nightmares about possible outcomes of being the new girl in the neighborhood.

You and your mum just finished unpacking the dishes in the kitchen when the doorbell rang. She rushed to answer it and you wandered behind her, curiously peeking at the guests under her arm as she held the door open.

“Hi! We saw the trucks and thought we would say hi! I’m Anne and this is my son, Harry,” the nice woman greeted your mum and stepping aside she gestured towards the teenage boy standing next to her.

His green eyes fell to you almost immediately and you forgot to breathe for a moment. You were not the kind to crush that easily on guys, well, not until you laid your eyes on Harry. He smirked at you, nodding in your way in such an easy-going manner and you could feel the heat crawling up your neck to your cheeks and ears.

Anne and your mum quickly became good friends. She was the rock your mum definitely needed after such a bad year behind her and you were glad she found support in such a wonderful woman as Anne. Their newly funded friendship got stronger day by day until the two families just… simply felt one.

Growing up the Styles siblings and Anne came and go in your home as if they lived there too. On many occasions you came home from school only to find Anne in the kitchen while your mother wasn’t even home. Anne always knew when your mum was working the night shift at the hospital where she was a nurse and always made sure you had a warm dinner on those evenings, often inviting you over to just stay at theirs while your mum was away working. Birthdays, graduations, Easters and Christmases, they were all spent at either yours or at the Styles home, strengthening the bond between the two families.

You have always had a strong friendship with Gemma, but maybe because you were closer in age or for something else, but you became the closest with Harry. Two peas in a pod, as your mums liked to call the two of you. You weren’t just neighbors or good friends, it was clear to anyone and to both of you as well that you were the best of friends. You were there for each other at the best and worst of times, before and after Harry’s launch to stardom. You were there with him all along, sometimes physically, sometimes just through text messages and reassuring calls when he just needed a piece of his home away from home. Late night calls and talks were your usual when he was on the road and he made sure to only talk about his life after you’ve told him everything about yours, even if the most interesting thing was that you were able to buy three socks for the price of two. Harry listened and cared for everything that happened to you, not letting you think even for a moment that he would forget about his best friend when he is on the other side of the planet.

The two of you grew up together and while his life consisted of concerts, screaming fans, telly appearances and award shows, your mundane everydays went on the same was as any normal young girl’s: you graduated from high school, went to uni and then started a career for yourself. As time was moving it became a little more and more complicated to stay as close as you used to, though, both of you terribly busy with your own personal lives, so the calls, texts and meetings became less frequent, but you were always able to pick up from where you left, it was as easy with him as it could be.

Maybe that’s why you grew to love him in a more than friendly way through the years. Slowly, but surely you started to realize what an amazing man he really was –is. It was impossible not to fall for him, however you valued your close friendship more than to just ruin it with dropping a bomb on Harry. You always thought he doesn’t feel the same way, so you were sadly left with your daydreams and fantasies about him only your bedroom walls heard.

This year it’s gonna be the tenth Christmas you get to celebrate together, quite the anniversary. There were only two years when you didn’t see each other during the holidays, the first one because you and your mum spent it in Canada with some relatives that live there, and the second one was because Harry couldn’t come home a few years ago, having a too tight schedule. But this year, everyone made sure to make it back home in time. Harry called you three month before Christmas to check in if you are still gonna coming home.

“Would be an idiot not to. Can’t wait to stuff my head with cookies!” you chuckled.

“Have you found your sweater yet?” Harry questioned, the muffled noise of the traffic around him broke through the line as he was on his way home when he called.

“Not yet. But I’ve been looking. I’m pretty sure I’m gonna win this year,” you smirked in victory.

“Oh, not so fast with the assumptions, little girl!” he warned you making you laugh.

The two of you had a kind of tradition. Every year, you go on mission to find the ugliest Christmas sweaters one could find, and then perform a chosen song at the karaoke machine after dinner, entertaining the rest of the family. Those performances are the best memories you nurse. Your absolute favorite one was just a couple of years ago when Harry’s sweater was filled with weird looking reindeers in quite inappropriate poses, he even added a glittery pair of sunnies and he sang I Want To Break Free from the Queen. Everyone was on the floor laughing as he took the living room by storm as if it was the Maddison Square Garden filled with thousands of screaming fans, while it was just the five of you.

He won that year, Hell, even you voted on him, giving him the cleanest win of all times, but you swore to live up to that performance and you really feel like this year is gonna be your chance to live up to that promise. You have quite some tricks up your sleeves.

These past couple of years you were anxiously waiting for the holidays to roll around, because you knew you would get to spend so much time with Harry and through the year, even with several occasions of the two of you meeting, you missed him dearly. Sometimes you selfishly wished he would have just stayed the boy across the street so your lives could take tracks that run at least close to each other, but you always reminded yourself that his work was his life and you would have never taken away his true passion and happiness. Besides, you love watching him perform from time to time, that was just one of your favorite sides of him, see his eyes shine so bright as he sang to his fans. You used to envy the fangirls, it always seemed like he had a special connection with them, but you realized that you were one of them. You felt the same excitement when he stepped on the stage, you bought all his albums, even though he made sure you’d be one of the first people to get your hands on it. You had a second copy of them, because buying it gave you the extra jolt of happiness and the feeling that you were a tiny part of his success too. You watched all his music videos, knew the lyrics to his songs and cheered on him whenever he won another award. Difference was that at the end of the day you could call him and tell him how proud you were of him and he stared back at you with that beautiful grin, his dimples digging deep in his cheeks, telling you that he wouldn’t be here without you. You always knew he just said it to make you feel special, but he insisted it was the truth.

“I’m telling you. It you weren’t with me I would have gone crazy already, pulling a Justin Bieber or summat. Don’t think you are any less than what you are, that’s just daft.”

Every time he said something along those lines those damned butterflies in your stomach went crazy and you tried your best to ignore them. You didn’t always succeed, but the effort was there.

Now it’s two days before Christmas and you are already standing in your old room after coming home from London, leaving your small but cozy little apartment empty until the next year. The walls are still the same lilac color you chose when you were fourteen, a twin bed is pushed against the wall under your window, the wardrobe’s door is littered with old pictures from high school and ones you cut out from magazines. You just never got around to take them down and after a while it brought you a comforting sense every time you came home. A warm nostalgia took over you when you saw them, so they eventually stayed.

Your suitcase is lying on the floor as you unpack some stuff you’ll be using often during your stay, but you don’t get far in the packing when you hear an all too familiar voice coming from downstairs. Leaving your stuff as it is you rush down and throw your arms around Anne from behind, who is standing in the kitchen with your mum.

“My sweet angel! How are you?!” she cheers turning around in your hold to hug you back, giving you a tight squeeze before she pushes you away so she can have a good look on you. “Swear you get prettier every time I see you!”

“Stop it, my head’s gonna get big,” you chuckle feeling yourself blushing a little.

“Never gonna stop praising my daughter,” she smiles and gifts you with a cheeky wink.

Anne was never shy to let you know that she thought of you as a second daughter and you still remember how it felt when she called you that for the first time. It felt nice to know that you could count on her no matter what.

The three of you chat in the kitchen, Anne asks you about your job and how things have been going, she hasn’t seen you in a while. You missed the times when you could just go across the street and have a talk with her whenever you wanted, but since you’ve moved to London, Harry wasn’t the only one you didn’t get to see as often as you would have wanted. Your job and life overall got you so busy sometimes, you barely had time to call your own mum.

“Harry is arriving this evening. Wanna come with us to fetch him up at the airport?” she asks you and of course you say yes. You wouldn’t miss the chance to greet him with a bone crushing hug just after he lands.

However, as the time nears when you’d have to leave to the airport, Anne calls you up and asks if you could go on your own.

“I didn’t finish cooking and Gems is in an online meeting. Would you mind if you went alone?” she asks and though it sounds a little made up, you don’t question her.

On your way to the airport you are nervously drumming on the wheel, the thought of seeing Harry excites and worries you a little. It’s been months since you last seen him in the flesh and though you’ve talked plenty of times on the phone and in video calls, it’s just not the same. You find yourself wondering if he still smells the same, if you’ll fit the same way into his embrace as before. When you were younger you often liked to think about the two of you as two pieces of legos when you hugged. Your frame just fitted so perfectly against his body, he was your absolutely favorite person to hug.

Standing in a corner at the terminal, you keep checking the board until his flight’s status changes to landed. Then your eyes are glued to the sliding glass doors, knowing well it’s gonna take him some time to get his bags and walk out, but you are just way too excited to finally see him again.

People start walking through the doors and your head perks up every time you see a slightly tall frame, only to realize it’s still not him. Until it is.

You can’t bite your growing smile back when you spot him, a beanie and the hood of his hoodie covering his mop of hair, sunnies hiding his eyes, but you’d recognize him even from just the tiniest detail. You push yourself away from the wall as you see him look around, probably searching for his mum and sister, because he was already on his way when Anne decided it’s gonna be you who fetches him up, so he doesn’t know about the change.

“Excuse me, can I get a picture?” you ask teasingly walking up to him and for a moment you can tell he believes it’s a fan who recognized him, but his face quickly changes once his eyes land on you.

“Fo’ fuck’s sake, you had me for a second,” he breathes out, his arms already reaching out to pull you against him and you gladly envelop yourself into his hold. “What are you doing here?” he mumbles tightening his arms around you, and you don’t mind it. As you face is pressed into his shoulder you smile when you realize that he still smells the same. Like home.

“Your mum asked me to come and get you because she didn’t finish cooking. But if you ask me she just wanted to surprise you with me. You happy to see me?” you smirk up at him letting your head fall back so you could look into his eyes.

“Always,” he grins before placing a soft kiss to your temple and letting go of you.

The two of you leave the terminal before anyone could recognize him and packing his stuff up into the car you head back home.

You hand your phone over to him once you hit the road so he can be in charge of the music and it’s no surprise when he starts playing Christmas music straight away. Grinning to yourself you glance over at him and see him scrolling through your camera roll like the nosy little gremlin that he is.

“Hey! I did not give you permission to snoop around my phone!” you warn him, but don’t try to snatch it away from him, there’s really nothing he shouldn’t see, besides, half of those pics have been sent to him through messages.

“Just tryna catch up w’ you,” he mumbles under his breath, continuously opening up photos he is interested in. “New couch, eh?” he asks showing you the screen for a second.

“Yeah, bought it a few weeks ago. You like it?”

“Looks comfy. I should try it out sometime.”

“You never sleep on my couch, what are you talking about?”

“Right, you always drag me t’ your bed,” he snorts and you gasp at him, smacking his chest gently.

“That’s so not true! You always just arbitrarily make yourself comfortable in my bed and I don’t have the heart to kick you out,” you correct him.

There hasn’t been many times when Harry crashed at your place, but when he did, he always slept in your bed with you, and the two of you have shared a bed a few other times prior too. It’s nothing new, though it does have a deeper meaning for you than for him, you think. Waking up with Harry snoring lightly next to you, admiring how peaceful and beautiful he is in this intimate state, you just wish you could see him like this all the time.

Harry smirks at you cheekily, scrunching his nose as he chuckles.

“’Cause I wouldn’t want to sleep anywhere else, Love,” he says before turning his attention back to your phone while you try to ignore the butterflies in your stomach at the nickname.

It’s quite late by the time you get home, you’ve run into some traffic, but it just meant more time with Harry. You gladly listened to his stories and you are happy you got some alone time with him. Parking up to your driveway you help him unload his bags before locking the car.

“Wanna go to the Christmas market in the morning? Promised Gemma I’d go with her and Michal,” he asks, slowly walking down the driveway towards his home.

“Uh, sure,” you nod smiling. Not that you had any other plans, the holidays are reserved for family and the Styles’ are family.

“Great, I’ll be here at ten. And thanks for the ride,” he smirks waving goodbye and you watch him cross the street before he disappears in his home and you do the same.

“Y/N? Is that you?” your mum calls out when you walk in.

“Were you expecting anyone else?” you ask, hanging your coat before you join her in the living room.

“Not,” she smiles giddily. “Was everything alright at the airport?”

You throw your legs over her lap and she squeezes your ankles playfully.

“Yeah, everything fine.”

“How is Harry?”

“Cheeky and smug, as always,” you huff smirking.

“Can’t wait to see him. I feel like I haven’t seen ‘im in ages.”

“When are they coming over tomorrow?”

“Anne said she’ll come around four to help me cook, the rest I don’t know. Dinner will be done around seven though.”

“I’m pretty sure Gemma and Harry will be here along with Anne,” you snort, knowing well they wouldn’t miss a chance to come over, especially Harry. He has been talking nonstop how he’ll be glued to your hip once he is back home, making up for all the time you’ve spent apart.

“They surely will,” your mum chuckles before you both turn your attention at the telly.

You go to bed way after midnight and finish up the packing you left abruptly when you left to get Harry. Shuffling around in your room you glance out the window and see that the light in Harry’s room is on too. Peeking out you lean against the window’s frame, thinking about the times when the two of you sat in the window, talking on the phone after curfew, keeping your voice down so your parents didn’t wake up, sharing secrets and your silliest thoughts. With Harry, you never felt like you had to keep anything back, he would have never judged you for anything, you could be your true self around him and vice versa.

A tall figure appears at the window and as Harry glances out his window he is quick to see you sitting on the window sill, your head resting against the frame. The two houses are not far away from each other and you see him grinning as he sits at the window as well, pulling out his phone, a moment later yours starts buzzing on the nightstand. You quickly grab it, and go back to the window.

“Creeping on me, eh?” he hums into the phone and you roll your eyes at him.

“Was just admiring the street lights, don’t flatter yourself, your head is getting too big,” you huff, but you can’t push your smirk down.

“Admit it, you were hoping to see me roam around naked, weren’t you?”

“As if I haven’t seen you like that before,” you snort making him laugh too. It’s true, Harry has never been shy to get rid of his clothes and he also doesn’t bother to draw the blinds whenever he is changing. You once saw him butt naked when he was nineteen, and when you told him to close the blinds next time he is changing, he just shrugged with a smug smile.

“’M not ashamed of anything, Love,” he told you and you had to turn away because you were blushing for sure.

“Right, you’re a fan of putting yourself on full display when you’re naked, almost forgot,” you chuckle shaking your head. “Millions of girls have the picture of you, lying naked on their walls.”

“You one of them?” he cheekily asks.

“Nah, doesn’t go well with the vibe of my apartment.”

“Shame. Though I think it would definitely look amazin’ above your bed, Love.”

“Now would it? I don’t know about that.”

“I’ll get you a copy framed,” he smirks and you can see it clear even from the distance. “Y’ know what? I’ll make you an exclusive one. One that nobody else has, how does that sound?”

“I can’t believe you, Styles,” you chuckle shaking your head. “I’m not gonna answer this, just gonna head to bed. You should too.”

“So we’re not sharing any secrets like we used to? Thought you’d have something fo’ me.”

“You know everything, Harry,” you sigh with a soft smile, though your heart skips a beat. He does know everything, except one big, fat, heavy secret you’ve been carrying around for way too long, that will probably stay with you forever.

“Right. Okay, I’ll see you tomorrow.” “Night, Harry.”

“Good night, Love,” he murmurs and you know he is smiling, thought he steps away from the window as he says goodbye and you do the same before ending the call.

***

“Hey! That’s mine!” you protest as Harry steals another roasted chestnut from your little paper bag, but you can’t stay mad at him when he is smiling at you so sweetly.

“Sorry, tastes better when it’s someone else’s.”

“Sure,” you snort and just let him get as many as he wants. You wouldn’t have eaten it all anyway.

It’s quite cold out in the town, but at least there’s no rain or storm, so the weather didn’t try to ruin your little trip to the Christmas market.

Gemma calls out for Harry to show him something and you just keep wandering between the booths, enjoying the atmosphere quite a lot, you have no idea when was the last time you got to come to the market, though you always loved coming when you were younger.

Finishing up your chestnuts you throw the paper bag into a trash can and turn around to find the rest of your little group, spotting Harry and Gemma deep in discussion next to a booth that offers handmade ceramic mugs. As you walk closer it almost seems like as if they were having a fight, which is just odd, they rarely do that.

“Just get your head out of your arse!” you catch Gemma telling her brother who only groans in frustration before he spots you, a smile plastering across his face.

“Hey, there you are!” he beams.

“Everything alright?” you ask looking at them.

“Sure, just Gemma is being a little nosy, is all,” Harry waves in dismiss. You glance over to Gems, but she is already back in discussion with Michal so you decide to drop it. “You ate all the chestnuts?” Harry asks offended, throwing an arm around your shoulders.

“Well, it was mine, so of course I ate them!”

“Selfish,” he narrows his eyes at you, but you both know it’s just a joke.

You walk further down in the aisle, occasionally stopping at some of the booth when you spot a place that offers hot chocolate in cute little mugs that you can take home with you if you’d like, or just take it back and get your money back.

“Oh look!” you gasp excitedly and head towards the hot chocolate booth. The old lady smiles brightly at the two of you as you take a look at all the choices. “Oh my god, they have caramel flavored!” you cheer, basically already drooling at the thought of a good, caramel flavored hot chocolate.

“What can I get for the lovely couple?” the lady smiles warmly at the two of you and you freeze at her assumption.

“Oh we—“ you start, but Harry cuts you off.

“A caramel flavored and a plain one, please,” he orders, without even batting an eye about how the lady just called you a couple. You can feel your cheeks heating up at the thought, but you try to calm yourself. He probably just didn’t want to get into explaining that you two are not an item and let her think what she wanted.

The nice lady hands you your mug and you take Harry’s as well as he pays for both of them. You would try to argue with him and pay yours, but you are already used to how stubborn he is and he never lets you split anything, it’s always on him.

“Thank you, have a nice day!” Harry calls out to the lady before the two of you leave. You peek at him handing him his mug, looking for any clue that would give away if this little scene got him just as bothered as it did you, but he looks perfectly fine and relaxed, so you decide not to bring it up. You’re sure he didn’t think much of it.

Your little stroll stretches into the afternoon, the four of you decide to have lunch out there too, then you just opt for a walk in town as Gemma wants to do a quick last minute Christmas shopping, so by the time you get home Anne is already over at yours helping your mum with dinner. Tonight you are all eating at yours, then tomorrow it’s the Styles’ turn to host, this is how you agreed this year.

“Woah, it smells amazing!” you call out walking into the house. The delicious smells fill up the whole place and you hear the two women giggling in the kitchen.

“Hi Honey, how was the market?” your mum greets you, a glass of red wine in her hand and the same goes for Anne.

“Great, we have a new mug,” you say holding up the emptied out hot chocolate mug. Stepping to the sink you wash it quickly and drying off you put it away in one of the cabinets.

You stick around in the kitchen and not so much later Harry comes over, the two of you leave your mums alone and get comfortable in front of the telly.

All channels are filled with holiday movies and you don’t mind, really, you like them all even if you’ve seen them a million times, you still find them funny and cute. Harry feels the same way, so when you settle on Love Actually he doesn’t say a word.

What startles you is that he grabs your ankles and pulls your legs over his lap, a small shriek escaping your mouth since you weren’t expecting him to do that. You’re sitting sideways, your legs are bent at the knee and Harry is kind of hugging them as his eyes are glued to the screen.

You find it rather hard to focus on the movie when Harry’s fingers keep fidgeting on your legs, they keep running up and down, sometimes he lays his hands flat on your knees, there’s no spot he hasn’t touched since you started watching the movie.

About an hour into the film he turns to you and you look at him in question.

“’M in the mood to cuddle,” he announces and starts moving around, not even letting you protest as he basically crawls to your lap, resting his head on your stomach as the two of you lay on the couch.

“Am I now your personal pillow?” you ask chuckling, but you wouldn’t want him to move for anything. Feeling him weigh down on you just feels so warm and simple but amazing.

“The best one,” he mumbles, bringing a hand to your side as you let your fingers comb through his curls.

You keep massaging his scalp and he lets out soft moans when you go over a soft spot, you can’t help but chuckle as he melts under your hands. His fingers start drawing circles on your side and the movie is long forgotten by you, all you can focus on is how great it is to have Harry so close to you. He is known to be a physical person, you are used to hugs and touches, but it seems like he is a little needier now than the usual.

You don’t mind it though, you just try to enjoy the moment, because it can end anytime.

Gemma and Michal come over a little before seven, and while your mums finish up the cooking the four of you set the table. You grab the crystal glasses and start placing them to the table, Harry lending you a hand. Once the table is all set you shuffle into the kitchen to see if there’s anything you can help with, Harry following you behind, placing a hand to the small of your back.

As you stand and wait for you mum to finish up the meals so you can help carry them to the table you feel Harry’s hand wander over to your hip, giving it a squeeze as he stands closer, so his chest is pressed against your back.

“Harry?” you ask a little out of breath.

“Hm?” he innocently hums.

“What’s with you today?” Turning your head to the side your eyes lock with his, but he just shrugs smiling.

“Guess I just missed yeh a lot.”

“You’re weird,” you chuckle shaking your head, but don’t make an effort to push him away. His touch feels way too good to put an end to it and you just want to be selfish a little longer.

His hands leave you when the two of you help to bring the food to the table, and you almost wish they would just return, but you gotta swallow the thought.

The food is amazing, as always. You all sip on some wine, just having a genuinely good time, enjoying that all of you are back at one place, something that rarely happens now that all three of you kids are all grown up.

At one point Harry rests his arm on the back of your chair, no one seems to notice but you. All these little things have been driving you crazy all day and your mind seems to be playing a nasty game with you. There’s no way Harry thinks of these details more than what they are, a friendly gesture towards an old friend of his.

When Gemma is telling a story about some weird guy she met at work Harry reaches up and pushes your hair behind your ear, his finger lingering over your neck a little longer than you would have expected. Turning to face him you give him a questioning look, not sure what to think about his needy and touchy self all of a sudden.

“What?” you mouth him, but he just smiles at you absentmindedly, curling a strand of hair around his finger, playing with it for a moment before letting go of it and going for another lock. You reach up and pull his hand away, feeling yourself heating up from his touch, but when you are about to let go of his hand he grabs yours, lacing your fingers together with yours as he rests them on his thigh.

“Harry…” you breathe out, glancing at the others, relieved to see that they are not paying much attention to the two of you.

“What? Am I not allowed to touch you?” he asks with a smug smirk and you roll your eyes at him.

“As I said, you’re weird,” you mumble under your breath looking down at your now empty plate. Harry gives your hand a squeeze.

“But like, the good kind of weird, yeah?”

“Shut up,” you chuckle shaking your head at him.

You try to tell yourself he is just needy because it’s been so long since you last saw each other. It can’t be more, you push even the smallest thought to the back of your mind, though it surely lingers there throughout the evening.

He helps you with washing the dishes, you stand arm to arm at the sink as you scrub the plates and hand over to him for drying. He gently hums to himself all along, swaying his hips, bumping against yours. At first you resist it, but then you catch the rhythm and start moving along, so your hips meet in the middle before swinging to the opposite side.

“What’s the song?” you ask finishing up the last plate.

“Just something random,” he shrugs smirking over at you. You hand him the last plate, he is still singing, making up gibberish lyrics to his song and once he puts the plate down he throws the kitchen cloth to the counter and easily grabs your waist pulling you against him as he starts swaying with you to his impromptu song. You let out a small shriek at the sudden movement, but eventually melt into his hold. The humming slowly turns into an all too familiar melody as Harry starts singing Sweet Creature into your ear, slow dancing in the kitchen while you hear your mums and Gemma laugh outside somewhere.

Your hands run up his arms and stop behind his neck as you lock your fingers and let him hold you close, his palms are pressed to your waist, fingers gently stroking you through the fabric of your shirt. You take a deep breath and his cologne fills your nose, one of your favorite scents, sometimes you just wish you could spray it on your pillow so it would always smell like him.

“Sweet creature, wherever I go, you bring me home…” he softly sings, leaning back just enough for your eyes to meet. It feels like your heart is about to burst out of your chest, it’s not the first time you feel so intimidated by him, like you could pass out any moment, but this is a little different. As if his eyes were telling you another story, but you can’t completely make up the words.

“Sweet creature, when I run out of road, you bring me home, you’ll bring me home.” He finishes the song, hums the closing melody and you watch him in complete awe. Your lips part when you catch his gaze move down to them and you swear you see him leaning closer, as if he is about to kiss you. Your breath gets caught in your throat, he is so close, just a few more inches and you’d taste those perfect lips of his, the ones you’ve been dreaming about for way too long.

It almost happens, it seems, but just when that last push is about to set in Gemma waltz into the kitchen and you step back faster than light, pushing him away even though the sudden lack of his touch is more painful than you were expecting.

“You guys—Oh, what’s up?” she asks stopping at the door and you feel yourself getting redder with each passing moment, the heat crawling up your neck, ears cheeks, right to the top of your head. What were you thinking? You let yourself believe Harry would ever kiss you, this whole scene was nothing more than just a friendly moment the two of you were sharing.

“I’m—sorry,” you breathe out making your way out of the kitchen, right up to your room to have some well needed space.

“Way to ruin everything,” Harry snickers at his sister.

“You joking? You wanted to kiss her in her mum’s kitchen?” Gemma snaps at him in disbelief.

“We were having a moment,” he mumbles rubbing his face with his hands. “Up until you stomped in with your big mouth.”

“Well, if you were havin’ a moment, just make it happen again.”

“As if it’s that easy, Gemma!” he scoffs throwing his hands in the air.

“Man up and tell her how you feel, don’t have to complicate it too much,” she shrugs before walking out and leaving her brother alone. Harry growls in frustration, the gears in his head turning wildly as he is trying to figure out how to come clear to you about his feelings.

Meanwhile, up in your room you get out your laptop and busy yourself with checking up on messages and emails you’ve been ignoring, hoping that the uneasy feeling in your chest will ease very soon. Your hands were shaking when you locked yourself up in your room, but as you get focused on other tasks you slowly gain your balance back.

You kind of even forget that the Styles’ were over, you only realize that you abruptly pulled yourself out of the evening when there’s a soft knock on your door.

“Come on in!” you call out and a moment later Harry’s head pops in, eyes softly falling on your sitting figure on the bed. “Hey,” you smile at him faintly.

“Hey. Thought you were sleepin’s or summat.” Coming inside he closes the door behind him then sits on your plush rug in the middle of the room.

“Just… sorted some work related things out,” you sigh.

“Working during the holidays? Tha’s not healthy.”

“I know, I’m done,” you smile shutting the laptop down and putting it aside. “Sorry I disappeared, I just—“

“No worries,” Harry shakes his head. “Mum and Gems went home, they thought you were sleeping too, tha’s why they didn’t say goodbye.”

“Oh, alright.”

“But I thought we could have a sleepover,” he peeks at you with a boyish smile.

“What, like we did in middle school?” you chuckle.

“Yea, thought it would be fun.”

“Well, I don’t think my bed would fit us comfortably and we don’t have the mattress anymore that you used to sleep on,” you tell him looking around.

“Nonsense, I’m not tha’ big,” he insists hopping to his feet and throwing himself on the bed, ignoring that you’re already there. His body takes up more than half on the bed , limbs wrapping around you as he brings you down to the mattress next to him, you can’t help the laugh that leaves your lips.

“You’re like a gigantic baby, Harry!” you laugh as he keeps you down on the bed with his arm.

“It’s perfectly fine for two people,” he mumbles with a smirk, closing his eyes as his head sinks into your pillow.

“Do you ever get no as an answer?” you ask looking at him in awe. You can never get used to seeing him so up close, like not many get to.

“No,” he huffs in satisfaction, his arm bringing you closer to him and you just giggle at him.

“I’m not sleeping just yet, gotta have a shower first.”

“Do what you want, I’ll be here,” he mumbles but you snort at him.

“You’re not sleeping in my bed without having a shower,” you tell him before you grab your pajamas and head to the bathroom.

You have a quick shower and get done with all your evening business. Returning to your room you find Harry sitting on the floor, his back against the side of the bed as he is scrolling through his phone.

“Does mum know you’re staying over?” you ask him as you throw your used clothes into the hamper, moving around the room while feeling his eyes on you.

“Yeah. ‘S all good.”

“You need a towel?”

“Yes please,” he says pushing himself up from the floor.

“Clothes?” you ask with an arched brow. He just grins at you and it’s enough of an answer. “Here,” you give him the shirt and sweats he has left at yours quite some time ago, along with a clean towel.

“Thanks,” he smirks before leaving to occupy the bathroom.

He doesn’t take long in there, you’re lying in bed already when he returns, smelling like your shower gel, strawberry and melon.

He throws his clothes to the chair in the corner and then lies beside you on the bed. You scoot over to the wall to give him space, but he is quick to bring you closer to him once he has made himself comfortable. You lay your head on his shoulder as you are both scrolling through your phones.

When you had enough, you throw yours to the nightstand, and stay cuddled up to his side.

“Do you remember the last time I slept here?” he asks tossing his phone to the nightstand and bringing his arms around you.

“Mm, was it at my twentieth birthday?”

“Yeah. You were so wasted,” he chuckles and you smirk to yourself

“But you took good care of me.”

“I did. You were so cute, rambling about how much you love me when I took you home from the pub.”

You bite into your bottom lip. You still remember that night vividly. Your birthday party had gone a little wild and you had gotten drunker than you intended to. Luckily, he was there to bring your home and he stayed in the bathroom with you as you threw up everything you ate and drank that evening. Then he made you take a shower, got you fresh clothes out and helped you get into bed. He slept next to you that night, holding you in his arms, gently caressing your back and upper arm as you fell into your drunken slumber. In the morning you told yourself he just did what any other friend would do, helping you out when you were clearly knocked out, but he made you breakfast in the morning since your mum was working all night and morning and he stayed over later the afternoon to make sure you were alright.

What you told him in your drunken state about loving him, it wasn’t just your friendly side, it was your drunken self coming clear to him, telling him that you are in love with him, but he didn’t take it seriously and you were too ashamed and awkward to even bring it up to him after that, so it was all forgotten very soon.

Following that you planned on telling him how you feel, several times. You even wrote a little speech you planned to give him when the time comes, but you couldn’t do it. The fear of losing him if he doesn’t feel the same was stronger than you expected and every time you had the chance to come clear, you chickened out. The thought of losing him as a friend is way worse than having to push your feelings down... forever. You just can’t imagine your life without Harry in it and you can’t risk losing him.

The two of you talk for quite a while, laughing about the good old times, until you both fall asleep. Sometime in the middle of the night you wake up and feel Harry wrapped around you, his head lying on your chest as he is snoring softly. He truly is like a big baby, an arm thrown over your stomach, his legs tangled with yours. Good Lord, how amazing it feels to have him so close to you!

Reaching up you tangle your fingers through his hair gently so he doesn’t wake up, his soft curls glide between your fingers easily and lifting your head you kiss the top of his head before letting yourself drift back to sleep.

When you open your eyes the next time the situation is the opposite, you are the one cuddled up to Harry’s side who is scrolling through his phone with one hand, keeping the other one on your arm.

“Mornin’, sleepy head,” he chuckles softly when he sees you awake.

“Mmm, what time is it?” you ask letting your head rest on his chest a little longer.

“Quarter to nine. You can sleep a little more if you want, it’s not that late.”

“No, I promised mum I’d help her wrap gifts,” you sigh rolling over to your stomach as you push yourself up to your elbows to look at him. “Love the double chin you got going there,” you tease him sleepily and he just smirks.

“Yea? Quite cute, right? Worked a lot on it,” he jokes running his finger over it before letting out a chuckle. “Ready for our battle today?”

“As ready as I’ll ever be. You are going down this year, Styles,” you tell him pushing yourself up into a sitting position. Harry only pushes himself further on the bed enough to rest his head against the headboard.

“Oh really? I wouldn’t be that sure about tha’,” he warns you, but you are feeling pretty confident about your performance this year. There’s no way he can top it.

“We’ll see. Alright, I need a coffee. Want something for breakfast?” you ask him crawling out of the bed.

“Yeah, that would be nice.”

Your mum is already in the kitchen, sipping on her morning coffee while reading the paper. She doesn’t find it even a bit weird that Harry spent the night at yours, it’s been quite the usual for you. Harry helps you make eggs and bacon and the three of you eat together, having a lovely time and you genuinely feel like it’s just like in the good old times when you were still living home and Harry wasn’t Harry Styles, but the boy from across the street.

He goes home after breakfast to help his own mum with the cooking for tonight’s dinner and you don’t do much for the rest of the day, just spend time with your mum, watch movies and relax. It’s nice to unwind after such a busy year behind you.

Not long before five you go to take a shower and get ready to head over to the Styles’ and you pack everything you’ll need for the evening: gifts, ugly sweater, accessories. Harry is going down this year for sure.

It’s a little past six when you and your mum walk across the street, Anne’s Christmas lights are putting the little town house into the spirit for sure. You don’t even ring the bell, just walk straight in, like you always do. The Christmas tree stands tall in their living room and the table is already nicely set. Gemma and Michal are snuggled up on the couch while Harry is helping Anne in the kitchen with the finishing touches.

“I’m rooting for you this year,” Gemma winks at you when you set down your bag in the corner that has everything you’ll need for your performance.

“He’s gonna lose this round,” you smirk proudly, very sure in yourself.

Harry greets you with a bright smile and a tight hug when he walks into the living room, as if you didn’t just see each other a few hours earlier.

When the food is ready you all sit down to eat, and though you’re trying your best to focus on the conversation, you’re getting excited about tonight’s karaoke battle.

“Anxious much?” Harry asks you quietly.

“Why are you asking?”

He doesn’t answer, just places a hand to your thigh stopping it from shaking, making you realize you’ve been probably bouncing it all along. He smirks at you as you just roll your eyes at him.

“’S okay, you can handle one more year of losing,” he teases you and you give him an arched eyebrow.

“Don’t be so full of yourself, Harry,” you warn him, but he just squeezes your thigh again before bringing his hands back up to the table, leaving you a little breathless with his touch.

You all help clean up the table after dinner and when it’s done, you gather in the living room to open gifts.

When Harry’s career launched, the first few years you felt anxious about gifting him, because you felt like you couldn’t give him enough. He had all the money and bought everything he needed for himself, there wasn’t much you could give him. But when one time, you admitted to him this struggle of yours he assured you that it doesn’t matter what you give him, it’ll always be precious to him.

“You thought about me, you took the time to buy something for me, and that’s more than enough, Y/N,” he told you and though it took you time, but you got used to it. Especially when you saw the same excitement in his eyes every time you gifted something to him, you slowly but surely realized he wasn’t expecting a Gucci suit, but a thoughtful gesture.

Gathering in the living room you open the presents one by one and just as always, everyone was quite creative with the gifts. You can’t help but still feel a little anxious when Harry grabs his gift from you. Giving you an excited look he unties the little bow on the top and tears the wrapping paper off.

“Y/N!” he breathes out, eyes softening as he pulls the knitted cardigan out of the box.

“I always saw you wearing all sorts of cardigans and so I finally had a reason to learn how to knit, so I thought I would make one for you,” you ramble as he holds up the baby blue cardigan that has little daisies all over the front. It took you an entire week to just make the daisies, you worked on the whole cardigan for more than two months, usually in the middle of the night, staying up until unholy hours to finish in time.

But Harry’s smile is worth it all, he is beaming, clearly so in love with what you made him, so you breathe out relieved. He then puts it aside and wraps his arms around you pulling you into the tightest hug.

“Thank you, I love it so much,” he mumbles and kisses your temple and you breathe in his sweet scent, burying yourself in his embrace, hugging his waist.

When you part, Harry reaches for a box from under the tree and hands it to you, a nervous smile tugging on his lips. You can tell he wrapped the gift himself, the silver wrapping paper is a little uneven, but the huge rainbow colored bow on the top is the perfect touch that makes it like a piece of him.

You carefully tear the paper off, peeking inside you just see a plain box that doesn’t give much away. Glancing up at Harry you see how he is anxiously biting his bottom lip, even though you’d be happy with a gift as small as a candle. It’s the thought that counts.

“I-I wasn’t sure if this was the one you mentioned to me, so I hope it’s gonna be alright,” he mumbles, eyes fixed on your hands as they open the box, while you try to think back what you have told him about that caught his attention, but you just can’t recall what you wanted to get so badly you told Harry about it.

As you open the box you don’t process what it is immediately, the plastic wrapper making it hard to figure it out, but when you carefully pull out the object, you gasp in surprise.

“Harry!” you breathe out as you pull off the plastic of the old, vintage polaroid camera. It’s not one of these new types you can buy in stores easily, this is a classic, must have quite a history behind it.

Now you vaguely remember talking about longing for an oldschool, vintage camera, but it was months ago and you’ve forgotten about the whole thing since these devices cost a fortune because there aren’t many left from them. But now there’s one in your hands, because Harry not only listened to you, but he remembered and went out of his way to find you one in amazing condition.

“This must have cost a fortune!” you huff, your heart pounding in your chest, though you already know it doesn’t matter to him.

“This face is worth every penny,” he smiles at you softly before you throw yourself at him for another round of hugging. This man surely knows how to have you wrapped around his fingers.

The two of you sit on the floor as you figure out how to make the camera work, Harry bought everything needed, so you have a few packs of films as well. When it’s all done you bring it up to your face and aim it at Harry. It takes him a moment to realize that you’re about to snap your first photo and he tries to snatch the camera away, but it’s too late, the flash goes off and the device pushes out the undeveloped picture.

“You wasted your first snap on me?” he protests rubbing his eyes after the flash blinded him for a little.

“It’s not a waste,” you tell him as you patiently wait for the picture to finally appear.

Slowly, the colors start to show and in a couple of minutes Harry’s face appears, his hand reaching in the direction of the camera, looking out of focus, only his face appearing clearly. He looks so delicate, his eyes dazzling as a soft smile plays on his lips. This moment now will live forever not just in your mind, but on this photo.

Harry goes out with his karaoke performance this year for sure and you’d be actually anxious about him winning if only you didn’t have the absolutely best performance right in your pocket.

His sweater this year features some really ugly looking penguins and a horroristic reindeer on the back, it’s really ugly and you can’t even imagine who thought it would be fine to make it and then sell it. His choice of music is also excellent, he has a great eye for songs you’d never imagine him perform and then shock everyone with it. This year, he chose Rude Boy by none other than Rihanna, and it’s fantastic, no one can make it through the song without crying. Harry makes sure to put on his best show, even dancing and twerking unapologetically, trying everything to win the battle and you are amazed by his effort. Above all the fun and jokes, he nails the song, that’s undeniable. It always baffles you how he can just slay any and all genres, even the ones that stand a million miles away from his style.

When the song is over, you all cheer for him, because he truly deserves it. He grins down at you in victory, but you just give him a challenging smirk.

“You can just give up now, if you want,” he teases you as you stand up from the couch and the two of you trade places.

“Oh, I think you should be the one to worry about losing,” you warn him grabbing your bag. Stepping to Gemma you whisper into her ear, instructing her to put on your song when you call out from the bathroom, since you are planning on do a grandiose entrance. When she hears what song you’ll be singing she gasps.

“Oh my fucking God, no way!” he looks at your with wide eyes.

“What? What is it?” Harry asks, dying to know what you just told his sister, but you shake your head at him.

“Patience,” you tell him before locking yourself up in the bathroom.

This year, you didn’t find the sweater, the sweater found you. On one of your thrift tours, you were digging up a huge pile of clothes when you came right across it and you knew what you needed to do.

Putting on the sweater you fix up your hair quickly before putting on your party glasses, the one that lights up if you switch it on. You take one last look at yourself in the mirror and smirk at your reflection knowing well you’ll have everyone dead when you walk out.

“Gemma! You can start it!” you call out with your hand on the doorknob, waiting to hear the music. Gemma quickly starts in and you haven’t even stepped out, you can hear a round of gasps.

Best Song Ever blasts through the speakers and you walk out trying your best to imitate a younger version of Harry, wearing the absolute ugliest Christmas sweater ever, that has the faces of One Direction all over it, filling up every inch of the fabric, and all of them have poorly photoshopped Santa hats on, it’s just literal trash and ridiculously perfect for the battle.

You grab the mic and start singing as everyone screams in the room. You jump, sing and even do the dance moves the boys do in the original music video, and when you look at Harry you see him staring at you in disbelief and total defeat. Everyone knows you won, nothing can top this performance ever and you could burst from the sweet feeling of victory.

By the end of the song everyone is up on their feet dancing and singing with you, a mini party forming in the middle of the living room and you all scream the last lines as the song comes to its end.

“I think we don’t even need to vote this time,” you say when the music stops, everyone screaming in agreement while Harry stares down at you, trying to hide his growing smirk.

“Where did you even find this?” he asks chuckling as he takes a better look at the sweater.

“At a thrift store, it called out my name, knew it’d be perfect.”

“It really is ugly, if I’m being honest,” he sighs, his eyes meeting yours again. “And the song… I accept defeat, you earned this victory, Y/N,” he tells you bowing and admitting your victory.

Later that night everyone is so keen on watching Holiday, you agree to stay even though you feel your eyelids heavily weighing down, threatening to close with each passing moment. You let your head rest on Harry’s shoulder and he presses his cheek against the crown of your head.

It’s not a surprise you fall asleep halfway into the movie, but what you weren’t expecting is to wake up and find yourself not on the couch anymore, but in Harry’s bed. It’s dark, only the moon is shining through his windows and as you turn to the right you see that he is sleeping peacefully next to you on his back, one arm spread next to him, hand hanging from the edge, the other one resting on his stomach, rising and falling in a slow rhythm.

Squinting your eyes you look at the digital clock on his dresser, it reads 3:23 am so you’ve been asleep for quite a few hours now. You don’t even remember him bringing you up here, but you’re definitely not mad that he didn’t bring you home, just up to his room.

Rolling to your side you give yourself a moment to adorn his beauty without fearing he would catch your wandering eyes. Everything seems so perfect about him, the line of his nose, his cupid’s bow that delicately rolls into her lips. The crease between his eyebrows, his soft skin on his cheeks, down his neck that runs into his broad shoulders and inked, strong arms. You truly think there’s no man that could compare to him and you are lucky enough to live your life so close to him, be able to touch him, hear his voice whenever you miss him, see his smile and share a connection with him.

It’s so silly, but you think of him as your personal ray of sunshine in your life. Just the smallest things about him can brighten your worst day, he’ll always have a special place in your heart, no matter where life takes the two of you.

Watching him sleeping you allow yourself to break free from your doubts and fears and scooting closer you shyly curl up to his side, your head resting on his shoulder, but you can’t even make yourself comfortable before you feel him moving under you.

Sucking on your breath you think he’ll push you away, not wanting you so close, but instead, he pulls his arm from under you, curling around your frame as he pulls you tight to him, almost making you lie on top of him. Your whole body is pressed against him and you mingle a leg between his long ones under the soft sheets. You let out a long huff at the warm touch of his body against your skin, completely lost in him.

“You alright?” he mumbles in his sleep laced voice, his eyes remain closed.

“Yeah. Is this okay?” you nervously ask as you lay your hand flat on his stomach. He brings his hand that was hanging from the bed on his other side and covers yours, as he squeezes you tight to his side.

“’M all yours,” he breathes out, his words sending a shiver down your spine. You’re sure he didn’t mean it like that, but it warmed your heart to hear it from him and you let your mind play with the thought that there was more behind his words than a friendly manner.

Nuzzling your head into his chest you close your eyes and listening to his steady heartbeat you let yourself fall back asleep.

Your morning is filled with coffee, pancakes, laughter and great company. Harry doesn’t let you leave without having breakfast with them, so you sit with the Styles family and laugh about the craziest stories from your teenage years.

“Remember when we tried to run away?” Harry grins at you, his red mug that had white polka dots all over it in his hands as he eyes you.

“Oh, how could I forget that?” you huff and Gemma turns to you with surprise in her eyes.

“Wait, I didn’t know about that!”

“Because we didn’t get too far,” Harry laughs. “We were, what, like fifteen?”

“Yeah, it was a few weeks after my fifteenth birthday,” you nod smiling.

“I had a fight with mum about God knows what, then stormed over to Y/N’s and talked her into running away. So we packed our backpacks and left.”

“Where did you go?” Michal asks with an amused grin as he listens to the story.

“We didn’t want to go into town, running into anyone we know, so we thought we would just go straight out to the meadow that’s there,” Harry says gesturing towards the window. The edge of the town is not so war, and a huge meadow lies there, a little stream running across it. “We walked for quite long, but then it started to get dark and we had nowhere to go, so we just ended up coming back home. No one even noticed we were gone, they thought we just went out to bike or something,” he finishes laughing.

“You knew about this?” Gemma asks Anne.

“Yeah, he came clear the next day, thinking he would piss me off with it, but I didn’t care, he came back for dinner, so it was alright,” Anne explains laughing.

It’s been so long since it happened, but I still remember it vividly, only that it was a more dramatic memory back then, now I can only laugh at it.

“We should go for a walk today,” Harry prompts to you.

“Wanna run away again?” you tease him.

“Always,” he chuckles.

You help cleaning up and agree with Harry to meet outside in an hour to take a walk to the meadow. Going home you take a shower and wash the dishes your mum left in the sink when she left for her morning shift. You put on a pair of boyfriend jeans, a warm sweater and your jacket with your trusty boots and you walk out the house right when Harry steps out as well. He grins in your way as the two of you meet in the middle of the street. He holds his arm out for you.

“M’ lady?” he smirks as you link your arm with his and the two of you head out for your little walk. It’s a gloomy day, might rain later as well, but it’s dry so far, so you’re just hoping to get home before it starts raining. Your runaway attempt wasn’t the only time the two of you came out here, it was kind of your place when you felt like having a break from everyone else. You biked out here, brought your favorite snacks and just ran around, enjoying the stillness.

However it also holds a bitter memory as well.

A little further down among the trees happened Harry’s first kiss and you witnessed it, feeling your heart break to a million pieces when you saw him lock lips with someone who wasn’t you.

Debby Hamilton was a friend of yours in sixth grade, you’d say, your only friend beside Harry and the three of you often hung out together around that time. Debby was a delight, you always desired to be more like her, boys liked her and she knew it damn well, but it didn’t make her cocky and egoistic. You always thought Harry had a crush on her, why would have he? They kind of looked cute together.

It was a Friday afternoon and Harry asked if you wanted to come out and listen to his new cassette he got for his old Walkman he refused to get rid of as technology was evolving. You figured he’d want Debby there as well so you invited her along, but didn’t tell Harry. He never made a move on Debby and you thought he was just looking for the right time.

That afternoon, you were supposed to meet them out there at five, but you didn’t leave until half past five and it takes about twenty minutes to get out there. Though you gave them the alone time technically, it still startled you when you found them under one of the oak trees, Debby leaning her back against the tree as Harry stood in front of her. She was smiling up at him sweetly, saying something to him and you were just about to call out for them and apologize for being late when Harry ducked his head and kissed Debby right in front of your eyes.

That was your first and probably worst heartbreak and you were only twelve. You felt betrayed, hopeless and naïve to think Harry would ever have a thing for you when there were girls like Debby. You left without letting them know you were there. When Harry asked you later why you didn’t come you told him you felt sick to your stomach, which wasn’t a total lie, you had quite the nausea after seeing Harry with Debby, but he didn’t have to know all the details.

He later told you about kissing Debby and you pretended like you didn’t know about it. However they never dated and not long after their kiss Debby drifted away from the two of you. Not that you minded, you had a bitter feeling every time you had to look at her after that, jealousy raging in your chest knowing that she got Harry’s first kiss.

He didn’t bring it up after and you weren’t keen on talking about it, but you still know which tree they were standing under and now as you near the area you see that it still stands tall near the tiny stream.

Peeking up at Harry you see that his eyes are focused on the same tree, but then he catches you looking.

“Memories?” you innocently ask, feeling your chest tightening. You don’t even know why you asked. It’s been over a decade since that kiss, you are both adults, but you still can’t help the sadness that washes over you at just the thought, why would you want to get him talk about it now?

“’S just… that’s the tree I kissed Debby when I was twelve,” he mumbles with a shrug. Biting into your bottom lip you look at the old oak tree nodding your head and before you could stop yourself, you speak up.

“I know.”

“What? How would you? I never told you,” Harry asks stopping, a puzzled look pulling on his face.

“Well I… It doesn’t matter,” you sigh, regretting ever opening your mouth.

“It does. Tell me!” he pleads standing in front of you.

“I know it, because… I was here.”

“You what?”

“I came, I was just very late. And when I arrived you two were standing there and I saw you kiss. I thought I shouldn’t interrupt whatever was happening so I went home and let you two be,” you explain, changing it up a little bit.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Why is it important that I saw it? It doesn’t change anything, right?” you ask with a smile that you intended to look innocent, but deep down it’s filled with pain.

Harry opens his mouth as if he wants to say something, but then remains silent and you are done talking about it, so you just quietly keep walking, Harry catching up with you a few moments later.

It’s awfully quiet after your revelation, it seems like Harry is deep in his thoughts and though you’re dying to know what’s occupying his bright thoughts, you’re kind of afraid you’d hear something you didn’t want to.

The two of you soon head back home and slowly, but you forget about the whole Debby thing. Harry starts talking again, but he looks a little keyed up still when you reach your street.

“Wanna come over later?” you ask standing on the pavement in front of your house, it’s just an innocent question. Harry nods his head.

“Sure. Is your mum working?” he asks glancing at the house, though he knows she is, the car is not on the driveway.

“Yeah. She’ll be home around six.”

He nods again and you want to ask if he is alright, but you decide not to. You share a quick hug before he heads over to his home and you do the same. The house waits for you in silence and when the door clicks behind you, it weighs down on you heavier than you were expecting. You hang your jacket, kick your boots off and throw yourself to the couch, covering your eyes with your arm as you huff out in frustration. You feel silly for getting upset about such a small thing even after so much time, but you just can’t help it.

You barely realize the sound of the front door opening, taking your arm off your eyes you see Harry walk in, eyebrows furrowed, a worried look on his handsome face.

“Harry—“ “I was waiting for you that day,” he simply says as you sit up with wide eyes, confused about what he is really talking about.

“What?”

“That day, we agreed to meet out there to listen to my new Stevie Wonder cassette, but you didn’t show up, Debby did even though I didn’t invite her out there.”

“Well, I did, thought you wanted her there too,” you explain, startled by the situation.

“I would have invited her if I wanted her to be there, but I wanted to be with you. Only you.”

“I-I’m sorry?” you breathe out, not seeing where he is going with it.

“Y/N, you don’t understand,” he huffs and he is right. You don’t. “I wanted to meet you, but you never came, or at least I thought. Then Debby showed up, I was frustrated that you weren’t there and she was being all nice, telling me how cute I looked when I was worried and it all just happened so fast and… I didn’t even want to kiss her.” He looks properly upset telling you the story and he takes a deep breath before his eyes meet yours with a hard stare. “I wanted to be with you,” he repeats.

“Harry, I’m sorry, I didn’t—“

He shakes his hair, not even letting you finish, because he knows what you wanted to say and that you still don’t understand the meaning behind his words.

“Y/N, I wanted to kiss you,” he then finally says and you suck on your breath as he continues. “Well, not right then and there, but I’ve been meaning to kiss you, I just didn’t know when. I thought that if we have a moment that afternoon I’d do it, but you never came and I was mad and disappointed. I hated myself for kissing Debby, because I didn’t really want to, it just… happened. I wanted to tell you, and I intended to do it when I told you we kissed, but you acted so happy, I figured you didn’t feel the same way about me as I did for you. So I didn’t tell you the rest, but…” He sighs in defeat, looking for words, but he ran out.

“Why are you telling this to me now?” you ask a little out of breath, your head feeling heavy at the new information you just heard.

“Why didn’t you tell me you saw us and why did you go home without a word?” he asks ignoring your question.

“I… don’t—“

“Don’t try to lie.”

Gulping hard you lick your dried lips as you stare back at him.

“Because I was… jealous.” Your voice comes out only as a whisper. Harry’s lips part as he takes two steps closer to you.

“You had feelings for me?” he asks and you just nod your head, not trusting yourself with your voice. “Do you still have feelings for me?”

“I do,” you whisper your answer and Harry lets out a sharp breath as he leaps across the room in your way. You jump to your feet, thinking that he’ll lash out on your for keeping it a secret and you open your mouth to explain yourself, but you never get to speak up because as Harry reaches you, one hand snaps to the back of your neck, the other one to your waist, yanking you against him as his lips crash to yours.

You gasp in surprise, but it doesn’t take long to kiss him back, your numb mind blindly reacting to his sudden action. Your hands snake up to the back of his neck as you pull him closer, returning his hungry kisses. His soft lips feel so smooth and warm against yours and when his tongue runs along your bottom lip you whimper letting your tongues meet in the middle.

He is intoxicating and it doesn’t help that your adrenaline level is up in the sky, you’ve fantasized about it way too many times, and now that it’s happening your body is burning in flames. He kisses you all over and over again, his body pressing against yours hard and when he even leans in making you lean back, you lose balance and the two of you fall to the couch, both of you gasping as you are forced to part your lips.

“Fuck,” you chuckle as Harry is basically lying on you, holding himself up on his arms, but you feel him everywhere.

“’M sorry, I got a little carried away, but I’ve been dying to do this since forever,” he admits chuckling as he lifts his head and looks down at you with those bright green eyes of his.

“Really?” you breathe out, only slowly processing what’s really just happened.

“Y/N, I’ve been in love with you since I first saw you hiding behind your mum.”

“Idiot, you were just a kid, you weren’t in love,” you chuckle, running up your hands to the back of his neck, your fingers playing with the soft curls. He smirks and nuzzles his nose against yours.

“Oh, I was, I just didn’t know it yet.” Leaning down he pecks your lips softly. “I’ve been meaning to tell you so many times, but I didn’t want it to ruin our friendship. Though I was growing impatient these last few years.”

“Yeah?” you chuckle.

“You can’t imagine,” he huffs shaking his head. I almost kissed you the other day in the kitchen, but Gemma completely ruined the moment.”

“I’m sorry I ran away, I was just—“ “No need to apologize. I guess it all played out well after all, right?” he smirks and you can’t help but chuckle.

“I guess,” you breathe out and the smile slowly fades from your lips. “And now what?” you ask quietly, staring up at him.

“Now… We’ll try to make things work. Test the waters. I’m very serious about this, Y/N,” he tells you. “I’ve been waiting for this my whole life so I’m not gonna let go of you now.”

“You have no idea how happy this is making me,” you choke out feeling the tears forming in your eyes.

“Oh Love, please don’t cry,” he begs and leaning down he kisses your tears away. “I’m right here, with you. Sorry it took me so long you get here, but I’m here now.”

“I know,” you huff blinking away the tears as you pull him down and press your lips to his. “I love you, Harry,” you whisper against his perfect lips. You feel him exhale sharply as he keeps kissing you before he lifts his head so your eyes meet again.

“I’ve always loved you.”

Thank you for reading, let me know what you thought about it!

#harry #styles #harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfic #harry styles au #harry styles oneshot #harry styles fluff #harry styles one shot #harry styles x reader #harry styles xyou #harry styles x y/n #harry styles imagine #fanficmas2020 #fanficmas 2020 #watchmegetobsessed fanficmas #watchmegetobsessed fanficmas 2020

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ye4gerismarchives · 3 years ago

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the bachelorette chp 4, p1: visiting connie’s family

an: hey y’all! this coming to a close end 💀 i mentioned this in a different post but i will not be active for a while. i’m traveling! i know y’all are rolling your eyes and groaning rn because that means a bachelorette chapter won’t be dropping for a while. i’m getting started on your next date and i’m hoping to get it done by tomorrow. it should be the shortest date! i’ll be working on your final date during on my trip and it should be done by the time i comeback! but i definitely will have the boys and the gang answer your questions and read your thoughts! link at the end of the chapter!

tags: black, fem reader

tag list: @taybird

Things were now different since proposals were nearing. From now on, there were no more breakfasts with Mikasa and Sasha.(why did i lie?)They were sent away so that they would intervene with your 'boyfriends'. And even if they were around, you wouldn't have been able to catch them.

Today you were woken up early because you would be traveling to Regako to meet Connie's family. You were already familiar with Connie's family, so he already had an upper hand.

Connie was very excited to get out of the house once more and to see his family. He was doing this with you, so it made things better.

"Martin and Sunny are gonna have so many questions, you know?"

He had been driving for an hour and there were a few minutes to go. In the past hour, you and Connie joked about a few things and then you napped.

"Yeah," you reply.

"My mom never lets them watch dating shows but for this time only, they're allowed to. So, they're curious. They'll probably ask how we're allowed to be in love...cause we're friends. And they'll be curious about being on camera as well.

You purse your lips. "Connie, you're one of my three boyfriends. Yeah, you're my friend but you're my partner too. In a week, if you end up staying, you'll be proposing to me, and if I say yes, you'll be my husband. You need to let go of this 'friend' thing and actually be my boyfriend."

Connie is silent for a moment. He opens his mouth again but his voice is quiet. "It's kind of hard to do that when there are two others. This whole thing has been easy for Jean and Bertholdt. They're die-hard romantics. I'm...I was your friend. I only know how to be friendly with you."

"So, are you saying you aren't into me romantically or what? We don't have to do this. We can drop you off at home and I'll go back to the mansion."

"That's not what I'm trying to say. y/n...I do want a future with you, I just don't have that same advantage as Jean and Bertholdt. And I mean...wouldn't you want your spouse to be your best friend and not a stranger?"

He was right. Bertholdt and Jean could do everything in their power to make you theirs but you don't know them.

"Connie, if I wanted, I'd stop everything and marry you right now."

Connie looks over at you and smiles. "I was hoping you could say that."

"I love you."

Connie's face drops. "Huh?" He slightly swerves on the road. You grab onto the upper car handle and giggle. "I love you, Connie."

This was the first contestant that you admitted you loved.

"Love you, too," Connie replies. You weren't sure if he meant it because he didn't include an 'I' but the rest of the time you spent with him would determine if he truly loved you.

It was still daytime when Connie finally reached his house. The camera team was right behind.

"You know...I don't feel so comfortable with Martin and Sunny being on camera. I mean, what if I don't win? It'll be so embarrassing for them," Connie said.

"They're kids. I think they're facing will be blocked out. Don't worry," you reassure him. You get out of the passenger seat, so you could get the suitcase in the back. Connie popped out of nowhere. Your hand was reaching for the trunk and he grabbed it. "Don't worry about it. I'll get it, ok? Let's just go say hi to my family and get things over with."

Connie didn't let go of your hand and lead you to the front door. The camera team followed behind and other crew members continued to prepare themselves.

Connie rang the doorbell and as soon as that happened, you could hear fast footsteps approaching the door. You could only assume that it was one of the kids. The door swung open and your prediction was right. The person in front of you was Sunny, who was now eight. She was the darkest of her siblings and her hair was in locs. But most importantly, she was adorable and had the biggest smile on her face.

Martin came up behind her. He was thirteen, brown-skinned, and was growing his curly hair out. "Hi, y/n," he greets you. "Damn, so no 'hi, Connie. We miss you big bro'?" Connie cuts in. Martin rolls his eyes and Sunny greets her older brother and jumps into his arms. "You're getting heavy! At some point, I won't be able to carry you anymore!"

The image of Connie and his sister turned into Connie and your possible child. You could see him not struggling to hold your infant and throwing them midair. You'd like to think that baby would be happy and wouldn't complain for most of their life. You imagined the baby having your looks and Connie's personality.

Your daydreaming was interrupted when Martin tugged on your hand. "My parents in the kitchen. Come say hi."

Of course. One thing about the Springers is that they love to eat and feed other people. During the holidays, Connie's mom would make food and give meals out to the less fortunate and Connie's dad was a monster on the grill. Before the show, you would come over and you would leave with like a month's worth of food. The Springers were also party people. They'll celebrate anything. These were the people who would probably play a part in wedding planning but let's not get ahead of yourselves.

(EXTENDED PART)

The Springers had sat you down in their dining room and the camera team wasn't too far behind. Mrs. Springer sat in front of you and was ready to start asking questions.

"How have you been? I've been keeping up with the show but...how've you been?" she starts. "I'm doing just great Mrs. Springer. Kicking out three guys does make me feel lighter," you joke.

"Oh good! I did like that Eren boy though. He's so handsome."

Mr. Springer nudged his wife and she rolled her eyes. "Should we start planning for your wedding?" he asks.

"Well, I don't have a fiancé yet. But do start expecting an invitation. Even if I don't end up marrying Connie, I do want you all there. You all mean a lot to me."

The older Springers let out an 'aw’.

"Can I be a flower girl?" Sunny asked. "I'll have to ask Levi but I would love for you to be my flower girl," you reply. The thought of that possibly evil little man did bring a nasty feeling in your mouth.

"So, how long do you plan on staying?" Mrs. Spinger asks. You and Connie looked at each other. Connie decides to answer this question. "Just for tonight. She has to meet another family member tomorrow."

The faces of the Springer family drop. "Oh...you don't think this is going too fast?"

"It's...it's going fast. For me, this show just started. I'll be married in two weeks if the engagement can last that long."

You haven't even picked out a dress or taken a look at one. You wanted to start planning badly but you needed to figure who you want to be with.

The Springers decided to move on from the wedding topic and started to talk about their kids' accomplishments.

You spaced out as they spoke. This could be you one day, with a big family, or even just Connie. You would come home from work and discuss your day with him, you would cook with him and just be happy with him.

link!

now voting for your boy is required. i know the questions for the boys is required but if you’ve asked a question, feel free to ask another OR let me know that you have!

#black!reader #jean kirstein x reader #aot x black! reader #bertholdt x reader #connie spinger x reader

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iridescentjin · 4 years ago

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Summary: Kim Seokjin had always been in your life. Like satellites you seemed to revolve around the same center, always coming back together. He had been the friend that would always be a constant in your life. When everything in your life starts to change and you feel like the trajectory of your orbit has changed, Seokjin is there to both hold you down and throw you even more out of control.

Genre: fluff, angst, smut

Warnings: recreational alcohol use, swearing, infidelity, unprotected sex (wrap it up kids), bad dad jokes (I’m so sorry), a lot of tension, sexual and otherwise. It’s actually pretty vanilla.

a/n: I am weeeeeeaaaaak. t’s unedited. I promise I plan to go back and fix all the typos at some point this week.

Pairing: ksj x reader

Word Count: 10,888

When you open your eyes, you see Kim Seokjin beaming at you from across the cake, smoke swirling up between the two of you. You scoop up some icing from the cake and, in what feels like slow motion, wipe some of the blue sugar on Seokjin’s nose. You giggle at the sight of him. He sticks his fingers in and scoops up cake and frosting and wipes them across your cheek. Before it can evolve into a full-blown food fight, your mom gets between the two of you, giving you both a stern look. The two of you giggle, much to your mom’s chagrin.

Most of your memories of your childhood feel like this. The most consistent thing in your memories from your childhood is Kim Seokjin, his smile, his laugh, and the way you always felt safe around him. The two of you running around outside between your houses, in the same neighborhood but one street apart. Sidewalk chalk coating your fingers and your knees. Sweat trickling down your brows and skin turning red in the summer heat. Gloved fingers throwing snowballs in the winter months while giggles filled the crispy air.

The two of you were inseparable. That is...until middle school.

When you were in middle school, Seokjin asked you to go to the dance with him, and you were so embarrassed that you’d immediately rejected him. Both of your faces were bright red as you told him that you couldn’t be seen with him because everyone would think you were interested in him. You regretted saying it to him almost immediately, but the damage had already been done.

The two of you drifted apart after that. He avoided eye contact with you in the hallway at school, and you felt guilty but never enough to say anything about it. Seokjin continued living his life. You saw his name on the posters for school plays, running for class president, and always around with his friends laughing.

Of course you voted for him and quietly sat in the back of the amphitheater for every production he was in. You never told him. You never told your friends, but you loved him despite your selfishness. Your group of friends in high school never knew about how inseparable you and Seokjin had been, and you assumed his didn’t either.

In April of your junior year of high school, your parents told you that you would be going on a trip that summer to a home that they’d bought in Buan, near the Yellow Sea. You’d be spending the entire summer in South Korea, even though you hadn’t been there since you were a child. You were excited to be able to spend the summer in another country, but you were pretty bummed that you were going to have to spend the whole summer away from your friends, Gwangju the only big city nearby.

Even though you were apprehensive, at the end of May, you said goodbye to all of your friends and promised to message each other online every single night, even though you’d be in different time zones. You cried through the whole airport and even on the plane sitting next to your mom.

She just kept whispering, “shhh,내 새끼 (Nae saeggi), you will love it. We will have so much fun,” while she held your hand.

After a while, you fell asleep holding your mom’s hand, wrapped in one of those thin airplane blankets. When you woke up, you were landing in Korea. The rest of the day was a blur, but you will never forget the moment that you first saw the Yellow Sea. The mountains off in the distance creating a scalloped silhouette against the sky, and the water meeting the shore creating a whirlwind of different blues and greens. It felt like something shifted in you, like you were meant to be here.

When you went inside of the little blue cabin, your breath was taken away. The wooden cabin felt homey and comfortable. Your mom showed you to your room, and you were floored by the view from the bay window. You hardly even noticed that there were two beds in your room when you started unpacking your clothes. You tried to put the pictures of you and your friends all over the room along with small trinkets from your life back home. It started to feel like your own.

As you were about to settle in for a nap, you hear your mom’s voice in the kitchen along with a few voices that you recognize but can’t quite place. When there’s a young male voice, you start to put it together. Before your brain can even form his name, your mom pushes the door opened followed by the last person you expected to see here. Seokjin.

“y/n, the Kims have arrived,” your mom said like you knew that they were coming or something.

“엄마!! What are they doing here?!” You jumped up off of the bed straightening your clothing and smoothing your hair.

Your mother’s face flushed, and she flew across the room to you, pulling you close to her. She whispered in angry, fast Korean, and you only caught bits and pieces. You didn’t need to know exactly what she’s saying to know that you’d embarrassed her, and she was upset. Your face flushed, and you felt the warmth in your cheeks. Hanging your head, you look at the floor in front of Seokjin’s mom’s feet.

“I’m so sorry. I was just surprised,” you mutter, your tone ashamed.

“It’s all right, y/n. I imagine Seokjin and Seokjoong were surprised as well. We didn’t tell you kids that we would be spending the summer together,” she approached you, taking your hand in hers. “We will have a wonderful summer, dear.”

Your eyes met hers, and they were soft and caring. You felt a sense of comfort looking into her eyes. While you looked at her, you saw a small movement out of your peripheral. As the movement continued and the shuffling sound increased, you turned to see Seokjin being pushed by his father into the room, a stuffed alpaca under his arm. He dragged his rolling suitcase behind him and settled next to the second bed in the room.

“W-what is going on?” you stammered.

“Well, y/n,” she looked between you and Seokjin, “because there are only four rooms, you and Seokjin will share this one.”

“What?!”

You turned to your mom exasperatedly and stomp your foot. She’s looking at you with fire in her eyes. “You will share the room with Seokjin, and you will not complain.”

Your eyes met the floor again. “Yes, 엄마.”

You grumbled to yourself in your head, but you turned back to Seokjin, shot him a dirty look, and turned back to your bed. You flopped down with a heavy sigh and popped in your earbuds. There was nothing you could do about it, and you weren’t going to push your mother further about how it made more sense to you for Joong to share a room with Jin. Your mother and the Kims were more traditional, and, because Joong was the oldest, he had the right to more privacy and his own space.

The first night was a lot of huffing and sulking from both you and Jin. You made sure to sigh loudly any time that he crossed to your side of the room to hang his clothes or put away his shoes. After the initial shock, the two of you floated through your days near each other without interacting for weeks. You would go down to the water on sunny days, lying on the beach, swimming, and enjoying the heat of the Korean summer. On the rainy days, you would curl up on your bed and read the same book you’d already read because you hadn’t thought to bring more than one. Seokjin did his own thing, and you only ever saw him before bedtime.

One evening in July, you decided to come back early from the shore to shower and try to talk to your friends online. You lay in your bed, tapping away happily on your computer, looking up when the door opened. A yelp rang out from near the door. Your head snapped around and standing before you was Seokjin in a white bathrobe, face tinted crimson and long, slender fingers grasping firmly at the fabric to pull it closed around him.

“Oh god! y/n! You aren’t usually here at this time. I thought-” Seokjin stammered. “I didn’t...and you…”

Seokjin didn’t leave, didn’t move. He just stood in front of you. Your hands fly up to cover your eyes, and you scream “I’m sorry!”

After what felt like 10 minutes, you finally heard the door to the room shut, and when your eyes opened again, Seokjin was no longer there. You felt the heat in your face, and you weren’t sure what you were going to do to make things less awkward between the two of you. Seokjin didn’t come back that night; you assumed he begged Seokjoong to sleep in there. You avoided Seokjin for a week. If he was at the dinner table, you told your mom you weren’t hungry. If he came down to the beach, you suddenly needed to go send an email to your friends.

On the last night of July, you were watching the sunset over the water and behind the mountains. You were so rapt in the beauty of the moment, thinking about how it would be perfect to come here with a lover as an adult that you did here the person approaching you from behind.

“I think,” the voice started, and you jumped, “that we should probably figure out a solution to our mutual discomfort.”

Seokjin was now sitting beside you on your blanket. He pulled his knees up toward his chest, wrapping his arms around them. The long, broad-chested young man that usually inhabited Seokjin’s body was replaced by a boy, cradling himself. There was a vulnerability in Seokjin’s face as the pinks and oranges of the sky reflected off the surface of the sea.

“I’m totally cool with pretending the bathrobe thing didn’t happen if you are.” You nudged him with your shoulder. “Besides, I didn’t see anything anyway.”

His hand moved up and cupped the back of his neck. You could see a faint blush in his cheeks and on his ears. You rested your hand on his knee and tried to psychically force him to look at you with your mind, but his eyes stayed trained on the fading pastels in the sky.

“You know…” he paused as if trying to think of the right words to say. He shook his head as if deciding against what he was going to say. “What bathrobe thing?”

He laughed that unmistakable Kim Seokjin laugh and slapped his knee. But he still wouldn’t look at you, so you knew something was still weird between you. You turned back to the sea and watched as the sun dipped completely behind the mountains, painting the sky even more vivid with its reflections on the water.

“Seokjin, if something is still not okay between us-“

“Shh,” he cuts you off. Then the two of you sat in silence until the only light in the sky was the low-hanging full moon and the porch light on the cabin.

You didn’t want to be the first to move, so you sat still, staring at the sky speckled with dots of light. You couldn’t see the stars so well in the city, and here there was still light pollution. But it was nice to look up at the sky and see the hints of stars. Finally, Seokjin moved beside you.

When you turned, he was looking right at you. “You know that you really hurt me, right?”

“With the bathrobe thing?! How?”

“No, y/n, don’t be ridiculous. In middle school. When you told me that you couldn’t be seen with me? That hurt me so much.”

You were glad that it was dark enough that he couldn’t see the blush in your cheeks.

“Seokjin, I was just a kid. I didn’t mean to say that you weren’t worth being seen with.”

“Of course not. I’m very handsome.” You could hear the smirk on his mouth, the wink in his eye. “But we did everything together anyway. And I had the biggest crush on you. I thought that was my chance, and you just kinda stepped all over my heart. I’ve moved on, but we’ve never cleared the air. You never even said sorry.”

You thought back on the conversation and the days and weeks following, and you realized that you never really explained to Seokjin and certainly never said that you were sorry. You were the reason that your friendship changed. You were the one who did the damage.

“Seokjin, I’m so sorry for the things I said then. I know it’s been years since I did that, but I never meant to hurt you. It was my own insecurity. I thought that if I went to the dance with you that no boy would ever want to talk to me because they’d think you and I were together. Now, I realize that the only boy I wanted to talk to me was the one I pushed away.”

Your hand found his, resting gently on his thigh. You squeezed it three times, not breaking eye contact with him.

He shifted his body slightly, so he was turned more toward you. And you followed his lead. “I know that you didn’t mean to hurt me, but it’s been so hard without you,” he whispers.

You didn’t realize how close he was until you felt his breath on your lips. “Seokjin, I’m sorry. I should have seen what was right in front of me.”

Your voice was wavering, and his eyes kept moving to your mouth. You were fighting looking down at his pillowy lips because you knew what would be inevitable if you did. But did you want to fight that? Or did you want to feel the way that his mouth felt against yours? His breath against your skin, close and intimate? Was this what you wanted?

“You really should have seen what was right in front of you. I’m so handsome; you must have been blind,” Seokjin laughed slightly from the back of his throat.

With his second mention in the five minutes of how handsome that he was, you decided that you were taking this far too seriously. Seokjin was joking and having fun, and you should have been having fun too.

Your body leaned in, moving even closer to Seokjin. Close enough that your nose could touch his cheek. You’d decided to let Seokjin make the final move. He closed his eyes and started moving toward you. Just as your eyes fluttered shut and you felt the ghost of his lips against yours, you heard an all-too-familiar sound.

“y/n! Seokjin! It is dark! Get inside now!” your mom shouted from the doorway of the cabin.

Both of your heads whipped toward where she stood, breaking any chance of a special intimate moment that you may have had together. You scrambled to stand up and put distance between yourself and Seokjin, and you yanked the blanket off the ground as soon as he stood up.

“Uh...y/n,” he started, trying to clear the air once again.

“Seokjin, it’s fine. Let’s not worry about it. We’re cool, right?” The words spilled so quickly out of your mouth as you started to walk quickly toward the house.

“Yeah. We’re cool.” His voice trailed behind you, in a slightly disappointed tone.

The rest of the summer had continued as if the moment on the beach never happened. Seokjin was around more and more with you, and the two of you started to feel more natural together again. It was like almost no time had passed. You picked on one another and shared secrets in the dark lying across the room from one another. One week, the two of you even adventured into Gwangju together, exploring Mudeungsan National Park and 1913 Songjeong Market. Gwangju was so beautiful, and you were so happy that you got to experience it with Seokjin.

When August came, it was time for the two of you to go back home and back to real life. You felt uneasy about what your relationship would be like, but you’d hoped that Seokjin would still be a part of your life.

It was a weird transition at first. You hardly spoke Korean at home, and you forgot that people wouldn’t initially address you in a language that you struggled with. Your friends had a hard time adjusting to Seokjin hanging out with you more often, tagging along to movie nights. Seokjin’s friends seemed happy to have you around, but he was very protective of you around his male friends, keeping a hand on your lower back.

Other than the initial awkwardness, slipping back into friendship with Seokjin was easy. You felt like you didn’t have to try as hard as you sometimes did with other friends. He already knew everything about you and your family and your past, and you knew his. The two of you were inseparable.

Seokjin was, of course, elected prom king, and you cheered wildly for him when they announced his name at the dance. He threw flying kisses at the whole crowd, and he turned to you and made eye contact, throwing a finger heart right to you and winking. You’d blushed deeply and turned away. You wondered why the hell you’d felt like that, but the moment passed. You let the thoughts that had been racing through your head go, never allowing yourself to dwell on them.

The two of you hosted your high school graduation party together and spent every moment of the summer together except when you went on a trip with your girlfriends to the beach.

Things started to change again between you and Seokjin when you went to college. He was studying film, and you were studying pre-law. Your course load was strenuous, even from the beginning. You’d chosen to take an additional class each semester in order to earn your paralegal certification by the time that you were a junior, so you could work in a law firm while you finished school. Seokjin was usually busy working on filming or editing or auditioning for something. The two of you had so much less time together than you used to.

You did make time to have dinner together in the dining hall once a week, and you’d catch up quickly on what you’d done over the course of the week. It didn’t last past the first semester though. One of you would cancel because you had a study group or a date or an activity off campus. And soon enough, it wasn’t expected anymore.

In your junior year, you’d started working at a law firm in town as a paralegal, and you felt like you were becoming an actual adult. You really enjoyed putting on your professional outfits to go to the office, when you’d spent the last two years in sweatpants with your hair in half-hearted messy buns. You felt like a professional. An adult.

Something that helped you feel even more like an adult was the young lawyer, Nam Joohyuk, who was just 6 years older than you, was the main lawyer that you worked with. He was so handsome that you couldn’t believe sometimes that he was actually a lawyer and not a model.

He talked to you like you knew what you were doing, not a complete idiot like the other lawyers did (which you felt like most of the time). He’d invited you to a couple of Happy Hours with the firm, which you had to pass because you still had coursework to complete. You couldn’t help the crush that you developed on him because he was handsome and kind and an amazing attorney.

In your senior year, you decided to let yourself have a little bit of fun because you usually said no to parties or anything that might interfere with your studies. You knew you had a lot to do, but a party or two couldn’t hurt.

One party was at a junior boy’s house, who you had met a few times. You went with some of your friends from your program, who seemed thrilled that you were going out for once. The house was packed with people, the air hazy and the smell of weed and cigarettes hanging low, creeping into your nostrils. People with red cups stood around while the loud music boomed in the speakers. As soon as you were deep into the house, you remembered why you didn’t like house parties.

You followed your friends, and you got a drink from the kitchen. A few of your friends disappeared into the crowd, looking for other friends or boyfriends or crushes. You stood awkwardly in the kitchen, unsure what you should be doing except drinking.

“I would never have expected you to be here,” a familiar voice half-shouts across the kitchen.

When you trace the voice back to the source, the shining, slightly red face of Kim Seokjin is staring back at you. You smile broadly, a little tipsy yourself. It was nice to see Seokjin’s face, and you were thrilled that someone you knew was here. As you looked up into his face, you could see that his eyes were glassy with the haze of alcohol, but you didn’t mind because he had such a warm smile that reached his distant eyes.

“Have a drink with me?” you asked, as you started to mix up another drink in your cup.

“Of course,” Seokjin responded, closing the distance between the two of you.

You stood together in the kitchen sipping the concoction that you’d made, which was not good, and catching up about what each of you had been up to. By the time your cup was empty, you had giggled so hard that your cheeks hurt. When you turned around to the counter again, you felt Seokjin’s body move behind you. His fingers wrapped around your waist, and the tips danced lightly on the skin of your tummy just above your pants. He buried his face in your hair and breathed deeply. You jumped a little at the contact, but you didn’t push him away.

You let him continue to touch your skin, and when his mouth found the delicate skin of your neck, you couldn’t help the small moan that escaped from within you. You pushed your ass back against him, and you felt his cock hardening in his jeans. The thought that his hardness was caused by you made your heart pound, and you felt the heat of the thought in your core. Your fingers wrapped around the back of his neck, flitting tenderly through the wisps of hair there.

“y/n, you have no idea how long I’ve wanted this,” he growled into your ear before biting down on the lobe. His tongue started to explore your neck and collarbone, and you moaned again, dropping your other hand to the counter to steady yourself. Seokjin’s hips started a small motion against your backside, rubbing your clothed ass to achieve some relief.

You turned your head slightly toward him, and his mouth found yours. Finally, you felt his soft lips on yours, moving slowly but purposefully. His tongue was sloppy and lazily exploring your mouth. This kiss, though drunk and sloppy, was absolutely worth the wait. You weren’t sure that you’d felt this aroused in months, desperate to have his hands on every inch of your body.

And then, as fate would have it, your phone started ringing loudly from your pocket. It blared the tone that you had set specifically for Joohyuk, and you couldn’t imagine that he would be calling you at 12am on a weekend unless it was an emergency.

You turned your attention away from Seokjin and held up a finger to him, trying to flash the most apologetic possible look to him. You scurried off toward the backdoor, answering the phone as soon as you were outside in the quiet and fresh air of the night.

“Hello?”

“y/n! What are you doing right now?” a slightly slurring Joohyuk asks.

“I’m out with my friends,” you half-lie, “what is going on Mr. Nam? Is there something you need from me?”

“Well...there’s one thing I need from you,” he giggles.

Was he drunk? What the fuck was going on? You were sure that he was far too professional to drunk dial his paralegal, and, besides, there’s no way that he was interested in you. You were just a dumb kid, and he was way out of your league.

“Mr. Nam, are you all right?”

Your concern seemed to shock him out of whatever weird mood he was in.

“Oh, y/n. I’m so sorry. It’s late. I’ll see you on Monday.”

He hung up, and that was the end of that conversation. Puzzled, you made your way back to the kitchen to find Seokjin. Much to your dismay, he wasn’t where you’d left him. So you shot him a text.

You: hey, are you all right?

Seokjin: yeah, I just needed to head home. I’m so sorry

You couldn’t tell what exactly he was saying sorry for, but you decided to let it go. You found your friends and told them that you wanted to head home because you were tired. Your head was foggy from the booze and the party and the weird phone call. All you could think about was the way that Seokjin’s lips felt on yours. His fingers on your skin. The warmth of his body pressed against yours. As you sat in the back of your Lyft home, you shivered thinking about the lack of warmth being shared with you now.

You’d tried to reach out to Seokjin several more times since the party but to no avail. Eventually, you’d figured it was probably just a drunken mistake that he regretted. If anyone asked you, you would have said you’d regretted it too. Even though you knew that wasn’t true. How could it possibly be true? So many almosts with Seokjin.

You continued to work at the firm, growing closer and closer to Joohyuk. The Monday after his awkward phone call to you, he had awkwardly apologized for the drunk dial and promised it would never happen again. You usually weren’t forward, so you had no idea what got into you. You smirked and responded, “well, I certainly hope it will.”

You’d blushed, dipped your head, and scurried away to the file room before he could respond. When you think back on it, that was probably the day your relationship with Joohyuk had shifted from strictly professional to more friendly. You were sure that being slightly rejected by Seokjin the weekend before had something to do with it, but you never told anyone about what happened in that kitchen that night.

When you graduated from college, your parents had hosted a graduation party with the Kims for both you and Seokjin. You were a little bit embarrassed that all of your achievements had to be shared with Seokjin, and you hadn’t really spoken to him since that night. The party was more for your parents than anyone else, so you let it happen.

That night, you drank a little bit too much, and by the time the party had wound down, you were drunk, sitting alone in the backyard.

“Hey,” Seokjin said as he plopped down in a chair next to you. He was holding a beer in his hand and wasn’t looking at you.

“Oh, hey. I figured you didn’t want to talk to me, so I kinda just minded my own business all evening.” You could hear the venom in your own tone, but you didn’t care because you had so many unanswered questions that you knew he’d never answer.

“Whoa, when did I ever say that I didn’t want to talk to you? I think I would remember saying that?”

The fake laugh that escaped from within you carried all the animosity that you were feeling. “You didn’t have to say it, Seokjin. You were too busy saying nothing.”

You cast your eyes to the sky above you, searching for any hint of stars in the sky, and, when you had no luck with that, choosing instead to lock your eyes directly on the moon.

“y/n, I-” he started.

“Save it, Seokjin. If you thought that kissing me that night was such a horrible mistake, you could have at least still been a friend to me. But you disappeared. Were you so ashamed of having kissed me that you had to completely cut me off?” The tears started to swell in your eyes, and you felt the booze heightening your sensitivity. You didn’t get up and leave, hoping he’d have some kind of explanation that made up for the past 6 months.

“y/n, it wasn’t like that. I don’t know how to explain it to you. I just...I was an idiot.” The sincerity in his voice didn’t make up for the betrayal and rejection that you were feeling.

“Yeah. You were,” you retorted as you got up and started to walk away from him.

“Please, wait!” he moved after you and grabbed your wrist. You didn't turn toward him, but you stopped walking.

“y/n, you have to know that I never meant to make you feel rejected or hurt,” he spoke softly and gently, with a delicate care like his words might break you. You’d hoped he would have had something better to say.

“Well, Seokjin, it may not have been your intention, but you did it anyway.”

You wiggled your wrist free of his grasp and walked away from him quickly. You made your way into the house and locked yourself in your childhood bedroom. Drunkenly, you sat on the edge of your bed crying into your hands.

Just then, your phone dinged from your back pocket. You half-expected it to be another apology from Seokjin, and your heart sunk when it wasn’t.

Nam Joohyuk: I am so proud of you for working so hard. In three years, you are going to be the greatest lawyer this world has ever seen. I’m sorry I couldn’t make it to your party. I got caught up writing these briefs.

You blinked the tears out of your eyes. When you were hurting, it seemed like Joohyuk just knew that you needed someone. He had a way of always being there to support you and tell you that he was proud.

You: Well, if you’re free now, I’m drunk and vulnerable. Come over?

You figured it was worth a shot, and, if he rejected you too, then you would be in the same boat you were already in.

Joohyuk: be there in 20

That was the night that you and Joohyuk first kissed. It was chaste and gentle in the front seat of his car. You’d tried to move further with him, your hand sliding over the belt around his waist. He had, seemingly begrudgingly, stopped you because he said that it would feel like taking advantage of you.

Instead, he took you to an all night diner and bought you pancakes, which you scarfed down. You hadn’t realized you hadn’t eaten all day, and that was probably why you were so drunk and emotional. He rested his hand on your knee as he sat next to you in the booth, and something about Joohyuk’s presence made you feel safe. You smiled up at him, a dumb drunk smile, and kissed him again.

Things with Joohyuk were always easy. You didn’t feel rejected or unwanted by him. You knew exactly where you stood with him. He was so nice and caring and sweet, but there always seemed to be something between the two of you. You really weren’t sure what it was.

***

Three years later, you were getting ready to graduate after a gruelly time working through law school. You had taken and passed all of your exams. You were in the top five students in your class, and law firms were already scouting you, though you weren’t quite sure what you wanted to do.

You didn’t tell Joohyuk that you’d been applying for some positions abroad as well because you weren’t sure how he would feel about it. The two of you had been together for the last three years since you started law school, and you were content and comfortable with him and your life together. You weren’t sure that you were happy, but he was supportive and loving. You loved him, right?

The week after graduation, you received a phone call from a law firm in Gwangju asking you to go to Korea and interview for a position in their main office, though they had satellite offices all over the country. You knew that you couldn’t pass up the opportunity to interview for such a highly paid position at such a prominent office.

Breaking the news to Joohyuk finally was difficult. He stared at you confused and slightly hurt.

“But, y/n, I thought that you were going to stay at the firm with me?” he asked, softly.

“That’s still a possibility, darling, but I have to see where this opportunity could take me. Please support me with this.”

You’d tucked a loose strand of his hair behind his ear, and he had smiled at you, nodding.

“Of course, I will. And maybe when you come back, we can take some steps in our relationship?”

The hope in his tone scared you, but you didn’t tell him that. You’d simply nodded and turned back to your computer to respond to the email you’d received from the firm. You weren’t sure that you were ready to take anymore steps with Joohyuk, but you knew that when you came back you would have decisions to make.

One week later, you were on an airplane, headed to Gwangju. You hadn’t been back to Korea since that summer in high school. Images played through your head of that summer, playing on the beach with Seokjin. You could see his face laughing in your mind, the sound of his laugh echoing off the walls of your skull. It was almost painful reliving the memories, knowing that your friendship with Seokjin had ended that night in your parents’ backyard.

Your visit to Gwangju wasn’t anything transformative. It was a typical interview, but you did feel like you nailed it. You spoke Korean with them, and, in your head, you patted yourself on the back for remembering to use honorifics, which your mother constantly yelled at you about the few months that you’d been here together. You explored the city a little bit after your interview, eating as much samgyeopsal and kimbap as you could shove into your mouth.

Since you were in Korea anyway, you’d decided to make the 2 hour train trip to Buan to visit the cabin. Your mom had been renting it out as an Airbnb while they weren’t there, though she and your father had gone a couple of times since you’d been there. When you told your mom that you were going to interview in Gwangju, she’d practically shouted that you needed to go to the cabin and make sure everything was all right there. She wasn’t sure that she trusted the housekeeper that she’d hired because the last time she’d been there, there had been some residue in the bathtub. You’d chuckled quietly to yourself at your mom’s impossible standards of cleanliness but promised you would check up on the place and clean anything that needed cleaned.

As you approached the front of the cabin, you had been flooded with emotions. Memories of your family, the Kims, and all the things that you had forgotten from that time. You unlocked the door and stepped into the still house. It seemed like it had been untouched since you’d been there seven years earlier. There were a few updates in the kitchen and different linens on the bed, but everything else was exactly the same. You stood in the bay window looking out at the sea, and tears trailed down your cheeks. You weren’t sure why you were crying, but you knew that you had some big decisions to make.

Even though you were the only one there, it felt weird to try to sleep in your parents’ bed or the Kims’ or Seokjoong’s, so you unpacked in the same room that you’d shared with Seokjin years before. You had planned on staying two weeks in the cabin and then returning home after you would hopefully know where you would be working. You napped curled on top of the covers of the bed and ordered dinner to be delivered.

The next day, you decided to open the bay windows and paint the mountains and the water. You set up the easel that your mother had reluctantly stored for you all these years and the watercolor paints that you’d brought with you. You put your headphones in and painted for hours, different color palettes and patterns, happy to drown out the real world for a day.

As you sat there, completely focused on the scene in front of you, you didn’t hear the door unlock or the man come into the room. He must have come from the other direction up the road because you probably would have seen him walk past your window. Then again, you were so focused on what you were doing, maybe you’d just missed him.

A hand was laid upon your shoulder, and you screamed, flinging paint everywhere. You knocked over the easel, painting splattering on the floor and the window. It took a moment for you to recognize the face that was behind you because you were blinded with fear. Soon your focus and concentration starts again, and you see Seokjin standing with a look of horror on his face.

“Kim Seokjin, what in the actual fuck are you doing?!” you screamed. Your heart was pounding in your chest, and your breathing was heavy. You felt the tears start to swell in your eyes like they usually did when you were scared.

Seokjin crossed the small space between the two of you and wrapped his arms around you. You pushed him gently, but he kept his grip.

“y/n, I’m so sorry,” he whispered. “I didn’t know that you’d be here, and I didn’t mean to scare you.”

Finally, you stopped resisting his embrace, and you fell forward against his broad chest. He held you like that for what felt like a lifetime, while your heartbeat slowed to normal and your breathing became more controlled. When you’d relaxed yourself enough and all the fear had melted away, you leaned back from him.

“So, seriously. What are you doing here? My mom said I’d have the place to myself.” You give him a look of consternation to let him know that you are upset that he ruined your plans.

“Oh goodness, well maybe your parents didn’t communicate. I came to Gwangju for an audition, and your dad asked me to drop by and fix a couple of things while I was nearby. I think your parents didn’t communicate,” he laughed softly.

“That, or they just didn’t care. They didn’t tell us we’d be here together last time either.”

You turned your attention back to the mess you made, and you slap your hand over your forehead. You begin to collect your brushes, palette, and papers from the floor, unsure of how you’ll clean up the paint.

“Hey, y/n, let me clean that up. It’s the least I can do since I almost scared you to death,” Seokjin offered, putting his hands on either side of your shoulders and moving you away from the mess. “Seriously, go take a bath or something and relax. I’ll clean this.”

You nodded and made your way to the bathroom on the first floor. You were glad that Seokjin offered to clean it because you were pretty upset that he’d spilled your paint and ruined your painting in the first place. You took a long bath, soaking in the warm water and letting some of your stress dispel into the water. This was the first moment you’d taken to actually relax since before you finished your exams for law school.

When you’d finished your bath, you walked out into the main area in your bathrobe. You smelled the smell of Galbi, Kimchi Jjigae, and Mandoo. Your mouth waters at the aroma that fills the room. You wander into the kitchen, and Seokjin turns when you clear your throat. His eyes widen as he sees that you are clad only in a bathrobe. He clears his throat and turns his eyes back to the pans in front of him.

You giggle. “Now, we’re even on the bathrobe front, Seokjinnie.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. I’ve said it once, and I’ll say it again. What bathrobe incident?”

The two of you laughed together as he continued to work over the multiple dishes that he was making. He seemed happy to make traditional Korean meals, and the way that he furrowed his brow as he tasted the soup made you smile. Something about seeing him in his element like this made your heart soften like butter left on the counter too long.

He plated up the dishes for the two of you, and you sat on the high bar stools at the counter eating the delicious creation he made. You had giggled as he slurped his soup and told dad jokes while he ate. You had forgotten how much you’d loved moments like this, and it was so easy to slide right back into things with Seokjin even after years of separation. There was still a pang in your heart each time you looked at him for the things that had gone unsaid for so long.

After eating, the two of you cleaned the kitchen and all of the dishes and then moved to the living room. You sat on the couch together talking and giggling. You didn’t even realize that you were still in your bathrobe as you sat knee-to-knee with Seokjin. Looking directly at him, you noticed a few flecks of blue paint settled on his cheek next to his mouth. Not realizing you were staring, you leaned toward him to get it off, your fingers moving up toward the flawless skin.

“Uh...y/n?” Seokjin asked in a hesitant voice.

At that moment you realized exactly what this looked like. To him, it looked like you were looking at his mouth, leaning toward him, bringing your hand up to his cheek. Oh my god! He probably thought you were going to kiss him.

And that’s what brought you to this moment, sitting next to him, face scarlet, hands in your lap.

“Seokjin! It wasn’t like that. You have…” you can’t even bring your mouth to form the right words.

He’s giggling watching your face blush and taking in all of your features. His hand grasps yours between your legs and squeezes it three times. You look up at his face, even though you feel shame and embarrassment from the miscommunication.

“I should have texted you,” he says, looking down at where your hands meet. “I just didn’t know what to say. I figured you’d only done it because you were drunk, and I felt like I had taken advantage of you in a vulnerable state.”

When his words process in your mind, you realize that he had been thinking the same things that you’d been thinking about the night at the party. You and Seokjin had never communicated about it, so you each thought the other regretted that moment.

“Seokjin, you have no idea how relieved I am to hear you say that. I thought that you were ashamed of what you'd done and that you’d only done it because you were drunk!” you exclaim, shifting toward him.

You see him smile and then his eyes widen as his eyes land on your chest. He chokes a little, and you finally look down at yourself. Much to your embarrassment, your bathrobe has shifted, slightly revealing your breast, areola clearly visible. Your nipple is hard against the thin, white, silky fabric, and you, once again, feel the heat in your face. It feels like everytime that you are with Seokjin, you are blushing about something. You pull the fabric back tight around you, covering all of the skin you’d accidentally exposed.

Seokjin shifts awkwardly, rips his eyes away from you, and stares at his hands in his lap. He starts giggling to himself. You’re already embarrassed enough, you can’t believe that Seokjin is laughing at you.

“Hey, y/n,” he starts. You are terrified of what he’s going to say. “What do you call a pop star with huge nipples?”

He continues giggling as you look at him baffled. Your jaw drops, and no words will escape your mouth.

“Areola grande.”

He laughs his windshield wiper laugh and slaps his knee. You chuckle softly. Leave it to Seokjin to make a dad joke when he’s just seen your breast. You shove him with your shoulder and stand up to head to your room to get dressed. Seokjin watches you leave the room, and he looks slightly disappointed as you disappear around the corner.

You poke your head back into the main room and shout back. “Hey, the other girl I met a girl with 12 nipples.”

He gives you a confused look, but there is a grin starting to spread across his face.

“Sounds weird, dozen tit!”

You giggle so hard that you snort, and you throw your head back in laughter. Seokjin bolts off of the couch toward you. His arms snake around your waist, and he pulls you close to him.

“That’s it,” he growls at you. “I need you, y/n. Is this okay?”

His lips hover just over yours as he tucks a strand of your hair behind your ear like a fucking movie. You nod vigorously, and he immediately slams his mouth into yours. It’s passionate and wild, and his teeth catch your bottom lip. You moan softly as he releases it and use your tongue to search his lips and his mouth. Your tongues are dancing together in your mouths, as your hands explore each other. His hands slide up and down your hips and your ass outside of your bathrobe.

He pulls back from you for a moment, his eyes searching yours. “Why are you so fucking perfect?” he asks.

Before you can say anything in response, his mouth is one yours again. You can feel all of the longing that you’ve felt to press your mouth against his since that day on the shore seven years ago. You needed him then, but you need him even more now. Everything in your life is changing, Seokjin is always there. He is the constant in your life.

Your fingers slide under the back of his shirt, and you feel his taut skin stretched over his muscular back. The heat building in your core is undeniable, and you pride yourself on not being shallow, but fuck if Seokjin’s body isn’t amazing. You’ve wanted to see it ever since that day you saw him in his bathrobe. You wanted to see the chest underneath, his nipples, the skin of his thighs, his shoulder blades, his belly button, and, of course, his cock. You’d imagined what all of it looked like in your head more times than you would ever be willing to admit. You want to savor these moments because you’d been waiting so long. That day in the kitchen, you’d gotten so close, but now you think it might be your time.

You hesitate for a moment, realizing that Seokjin could disappear again at any moment. He must feel the pause because he pulls back from you.

“Is everything all right, y/n? Are you not enjoying this? Oh my god, did I read this wrong? Were you just looking at me like that because I’m so handsome?”

You laugh, once again. It seems like you’re always laughing when Seokjin is around. “No, I was actually looking at you like that because you have paint on your face. But I want this. Please Seokjin. I want this.”

You stare up at him, trying to project all of your desire into your gaze, and it must work because he groans and pulls you closer against his body. He presses his lips to your neck and your collarbone.

“Why don’t we take this to our shared childhood bedroom?” he asks as he pulls away and winks.

“When you say it like that, it sounds absolutely disgusting,” you retort, shoving him again.

You lead him by the hand into the bedroom, and, once inside, you undo the tie on your robe. It stays on your shoulders for now, and your finger seductively beckons him toward you. You swear you hear a whimper come from him, and he closes the distance between you.

His fingertips are smooth against the skin on your sides as he slides them beneath your robe. You take that moment to push your fingers up under the front of his shirt and yank it over his head. He shakes his hair out and pulls you even closer to him. The skin from your chest meets the skin on his, and the skinship makes you immediately melt.

Your mouth traces along his collarbone, leaving small nips and bites along the way. You sink your teeth into one of his shoulders, and he inhales sharply but doesn’t stop you. You smile to yourself. Your fingers struggle slightly with the button on his pants, and he laughs slightly, bringing his own hands to help you.

He slides his jeans down his hips and stands before you in his black boxer briefs, hard cock clearly straining against the cotton fabric. Your jaw drops slightly as you see the size of the bulge, and you look up at him, with a look that could probably only be described as wonderment. He chuckles and loops his finger under your chin. He pulls your mouth to his for a gentle kiss, and you can’t believe that you’ve waited this long to experience all of these things for the first time.

You slip your robe from your shoulders, standing before him completely exposed. Your nipples are hard with arousal and the slight chill in the air. You feel yourself pinching your shoulder blades together, trying to make your breasts look more young and perky because you know that gravity has already started taking them. Joohyuk once commented that both your nipples pointed downward in an offhand joke, and you hadn’t been able to look at them in the mirror since.

“Holy shit,” Seokjin mutters. He leans into your ear, kissing the lobe softly. “Relax.”

Even just the simple action of him being impressed and turned on by your body makes you feel so much more comfortable with him. You can’t wait any longer, and you slide your hand into his underwear. As your fingers slide around his girth, you feel how soaked you are, the slickness sliding down your inner thigh. Seokjin groans as you slowly stroke him under his underwear.

His hands trace a path up from your things to your breasts. He takes each of your nipples between his fingers and rolls them gently. The stimulation causes you to arch your back and moan. You aren’t sure how you are growing even wetter with his ministrations.

“Seokjin, please. I’ve waited so long. I need you.”

He doesn’t hesitate any longer. He slides his boxer briefs all the way down his hips and steps out of them. He picks you up and lays you down gently on his bed. He climbs on top of you, kissing gently on your collarbone, chest, and finally on your mouth.

“You have no idea how badly I want this,” he whispers against your lips, and your heart jumps in your chest. “I don’t think I’ll last long.”

You chuckle to yourself. “Jinnie, I don’t think I’ll last long either. But we have a lot of time.”

You hadn’t called him Jinnie since you were kids, and the pet name seems to soften his expression slightly. He dips his head to kiss you again. He grips his cock around the base and aligns himself with your entrance. You draw your knees up on either side of him, wrapping your ankles around his back. When he pushes into you, you gasp. The way that his cock stretches you plus the anticipation of this moment makes your eyes flutter shut. He slides slowly into you, burying his cock inside of you.

After you’ve adjusted to him, Seokjin starts to move his hips quicker, establishing a rhythm that drags against the spot inside of you that makes your eyes roll back slightly. With Seokjin buried inside of you, nothing else matters. All you can remember is the sensation between your legs and the way that Seokjin’s body feels on top of you.

Seokjin’s breathing is ragged, and you feel yourself coming upon an orgasm already. You couldn’t believe that your emotions could affect your sexual sensations so much, but you didn’t want to spend another moment without Seokjin inside of you.

“y/n, you’re so fucking tight. Fuck. You’re fucking perfect,” Seokjin huffs out against your neck.

“Jinnie,” you trail off as you feel yourself pulse around his cock. Your mind goes blank and all you see is whiteness in your mind. It’s like your mind has been completely purified of all the darkness that existed inside of you, and you tumble over the edge of your orgasm. You feel all the tension and stress of the last few months melting into the mattress as Seokjin thrusts inside of you.

His cock twitches, and he’s moaning your name over and over while he paints your walls with his hot cum. You topple into another orgasm as you feel him filling you up. Nothing has ever felt more worth the wait than having Seokjin’s cum inside of you. Soon the two of you come down, and your sweaty bodies stop moving together.

He lies on top of you for a little while, crushing you slightly, but you don’t mind too much. You’re too happy to care about being squished. If you weren’t his completely before, you certainly were now. You can’t imagine spending another day without Seokjin in your arms and in your bed. But that, of course, means that you have to end things with Joohyuk. For now, you just wanted to cherish this moment, trying not to let yourself think about the possibility that Seokjin didn’t feel the same way.

The next several days, you and Seokjin spent cleaning and doing projects around the house. You also made love in every single room of the house. You went to the beach and watched the sunset like you did as teenagers. Everything felt new and wonderful. In the middle of the second week, you got a call from the law firm in Gwangju officially offering you the position. They gave you two weeks to think about your decision and get back to them.

You wanted to take it, but you had to talk to Joohyuk first. It was unfair of you to fuck someone else while you were with him and accept a job in another country without telling him. You put thoughts of your boyfriend out of your head and focused your attention on the man who you’d spent the last two weeks with nonstop. You were so fond of Seokjin, but you weren’t quite sure where he stood. You didn’t want to push him and end up pushing him away. You enjoyed the time that you had with him, and when it was time for you to leave you kissed him for an hour before you finally had to call a taxi or you’d miss your flight.

Back home, everything felt surreal. It didn’t feel like your own life anymore. You had moved out of your university apartment after law school, so all of your stuff was at your parents’ house. You expected that you’d probably move in with Joohyuk when you graduated, but now, even if you weren’t with Seokjin, you were sure that you didn’t want to be with Joohyuk. You weren’t ready to break his heart, but it had to happen.

You called him and asked him to meet you at your parents house. When he arrived you met him in the front yard, and he ran to you, picking you up and spinning you around in his arms. You laughed awkwardly, not knowing how to make this situation less uncomfortable. When he put your down, you decided to just rip off the bandaid.

“Joo-” you started.

“Before you say anything, I want to get a good look at you and ask you something,” he interrupts.

You stand awkwardly before him while he admires you, and suddenly, you feel dirty for what you’ve done. You didn’t even really consider that what you’d done with Seokjin had been cheating. You just thought that it had been fulfilling your destiny, doing what felt right, what was inevitable. But with Joohyuk looking at you with love in his eyes now, you realized what you had done had not just been realizing that you didn’t want to be with him. You had cheated. A lot.

After he stares at you for a minute, he drops down to one knee in front of you.

Oh fuck.

“y/n, you have made me so happy these last three years, and I’m hoping that you’ll-” he gets cut off by the sound of someone out on the street.

“Seriously, y/n?! Seriously?”

It’s Seokjin. He has pulled his car over to the side of the road, and he is looking at you exasperatedly.

“No! Seokjin, wait! It isn’t what it looks like!” you shout, while Joohyuk looks up at you bewildered.

“Oh, so you aren’t currently being proposed to by another man after you spent two weeks having sex with me in Korea?”

Joohyuk’s smile drops off his face, and he looks between you and Seokjin over and over. He’s clearly confused and hurt and disappointed.

“It’s not like that, Jin. I was about to tell him.”

“What?” Joohyuk blurts out.

“Whatever,” Seokjin shouts dejectedly and drives off.

Tears start to spill from Joohyuk’s eyes. “I’m going to get off my knee now,” he mutters.

“Joo, you have to know that I never meant to hurt you. I’m so sorry. I realized that I wasn’t happy, and I know now that I want to take the job in Gwangju. This isn’t what I wanted for my life. I just want to be happy. Can’t you see that?”

You feel the hot tears rolling down your cheeks. This is not how you pictured this conversation going.

Joohyuk looks at you deep in the eyes. “All I can see is what this night could have been.”

He stalks off toward his car and drives away from your parents house and from your life. You know that you fucked up bad, and now the man that was the only one who could make you happy is gone too. You don’t know how you’re going to convince Seokjin that you were trying to break up with Joohyuk, but you decide to take the night to think about it.

The next day, you’ve formulated your plan, and you are ready to execute it. Your mom asked Seokjin’s mom for the spare key to his apartment, and, because the two are so close, she gave it up right away.

You knew that Seokjin would be out all day, running errands that his mom asked him to do. You really had an amazing ally in his mother. You snuck into his apartment, with all of your supplies in two paper grocery bags, awkwardly carrying one on either side of your hips. You worked for hours getting everything ready.

When Seokjin’s key slides into the lock, you are standing in the living, surrounded by pink flowers and fairy lights. It takes him a moment to process what is in front of him, but when he sees you, he looks slightly disappointed. It’s okay, you kind of expected that.

“Don’t you have a fiance to hang out with?” he asks with acid on his tongue.

“No. I don’t,” you state blandly. “And I hope that you’ll give me two minutes to explain.”

“One minute,” he responds, like you knew he would.

You take the game hourglass timer that you have in your hand, turn it upside down, and place it on the table.

“When I hooked up with you in Buan, yes I had a boyfriend, and I did cheat on him with you. I was unhappy with him, and honestly, I didn’t realize that it was because I’d just been waiting for you all these years. When you saw us, he had come over to propose, but I had invited him over to end things with him. He’s nice and caring, but he isn’t you. You’re all I want, Seokjin. I made a mistake, and I hope that you can forgive me and give me a chance. I ended a three year relationship because I was so hopeful that things would work out with you that I couldn’t stand to put that in jeopardy by being in a relationship. But I messed it up anyway”

The last of the sand falls through the hourglass as you glance down at it, and you look up at him. His expression is hard to read because it is so stony. The two of you just look into each other’s eyes for another moment.

“You swear it’s over with him?” he asks.

“Of course. You’re all I want, Jinnie.”

“y/n, you have no idea how badly I want to be with you, b-but I have to tell you something first.”

You feel the tears starting to build in your tear ducts, but you force them down. “Tell me, please.”

“I’m moving to Gwangju at least for a while because I was offered a role in a K-Drama, and I’ve accepted it. If we were to be together, it would be long distance, and you know how that goes.” His hand goes up to the back of his neck, and he diverts his eyes from yours.

“Okay, well, two things about that.” You can hear that your tone sounds sarcastic, and you laugh to yourself in your head. “First of all, you and I could make a long distance relationship work, I believe that with my whole heart.”

“y/n, it’s so hard. With time zones, everything is just extra challenging. I’m not sure that’s what either of us want.”

“Well, let me finish then,” you retort. “Second of all, I accepted a job offer at a law firm in Gwangju, so I’ll be moving to Korea in two weeks.”

Seokjin’s jaw drops. “Shut the fuck up.”

“I will not.

A smile spreads across his features. He strides across the room to you, picks you up in his big arms, and presses his mouth against yours. You kiss for several minutes, Seokjin’s arms wrapped around you.

The two of you spend the rest of the evening making love on the couch and talking about your plans for living in Korea and adjusting to Korean culture. You feel so overwhelmingly excited that you have Seokjin finally and that he will be the person who is with you as you enter this new chapter of your life. You decide that you have some time to work out the details, and right now, you just want to be with each other.

That night when you are lying in bed, your head rests on Seokjin’s chest. He pushes your hair out of your face, like he does, and he looks down at you.

“Hey, y/n?” he whispers.

“Yes, my wonderful Seokjin?”

“How long have the moon and earth been together like this?”

You aren’t sure what he’s saying. You open your mouth to respond, but you see on his face that he’s doing something.

“You’re my planet. I’m just a moon to you. I’m just a little star for you that lights up your heart, but you are my earth. All I see is you.”

You start crying again. How does he say the sweetest things like that like it’s nothing to him?

“I love you, Seokjin,” you whisper up at him.

He wipes one of the tears from your cheek and presses it to his lips. “I love you too, y/n.”

#btscafe7 #btswritingcafe #bangtanarmynet #smutcentralnet #ksmutclub #seokjin smut #jin smut #jin x reader #seokjin x reader #kim seokjin #kim seokjin x reader #bts x reader #bts smut #bts moon #seokjn #jin #bts jin #bts fanfic #nam joo hyuk

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pricetagofficial · 4 years ago

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The Archer -Part Three

Warnings: language, violence, some cringe (because I was still trying to figure out what I wanted for this story two months ago when I wrote) lil bits of fluff?

Part Two Part Four

Word Count: 2233

Tag List: @idkmanicantenglish @kishony-the-geek @catxsnow (you’d probably kick me if I didn’t tag you lol)

A/N: I cringe at little bits of this, and I am sorry for some of it. This was written over two months ago when I was still trying to get a feel for the story and how I wanted to write the characters, maybe I’ll throw up chapter four later???

Chapter Three

Rory looked around her new room, it was about the same size as her room back in Queen Manor. There was a bed with a neutral color bedspread and several pillows, with a night stand on both sides of the bed. Each nightstand had a lamp on it and a vase of flowers, probably put there by Alfred. Rory smiled at the Daisies in the vase, Oliver must have told him they were her favorite. Leaning down, she took in the sweet floral smell that reminded her of home. Across the room was a desk with a TV mounted on the wall above it with the remotes resting below it. To the left of it was a dresser set with a vanity, and to the right were two doors.

Walking over she opened one door and saw that it was a massive walk in closet full of racks and drawers and shelves all for her clothes. Did Rory even have enough clothes to fill this thing, she had no idea. All she brought were three suitcases of clothes and other necessities that she needed. Oliver told her that if she needed more, just to let him know and he would have it shipped immediately. Closing the closet door, she opened the second door and saw an attached bathroom with two sinks, a toilet and a shower with a tub.

Looking through the cabinets, they were stocked with the basic essentials. Of course, she had brought her own bathroom stuff, Rory preferred to use her stuff; it was best suited for her hair and it was her favorite scent.

Leaving the bathroom, Rory walked over to the large window and pulled back the curtains. She opened the balcony door and her jaw dropped, the view out her balcony was breathtaking. Of course, Wayne Manor was a ways away from Gotham City, but she could still see the skyline in the distance among the beautiful scenery. There was a forest, a waterfall with a small lake under it. Her view at Queen Manor was beautiful, but it was nothing like this.

Tim stood outside her bedroom door, debating if he wanted to knock or not. He was sure that Rory was settling herself in, but Bruce had wanted them all down in the Batcave for a meeting and that included Rory. After a few moments, he raised his hand and knocked.

There was no answer.

He knocked twice more, and still no answer.

At this point Tim decided to open the door ever so slightly and poke his head in and across the room stood Rory on her balcony, her brown hair blowing in the breeze. Deciding to invite himself in, he opened the door fully and walked across the room and stopped behind her. If Rory knew he was there, she didn’t show any sign.

He put a hand on her shoulder, and felt Rory tense at his touch.

Quickly, Rory grabbed his hand putting her elbow above his hand and turned, putting him into a wrist lock. Tim let out a yelp in surprise and craned his neck to look at her with wide eyes. “Rory, it’s just me.” He said quickly.

Immediately, Rory let him go. “Sorry Tim, just surprised.” She said with a shrug.

Tim let out a laugh. “Yeah, I can tell.” He stood up and circulated his shoulder. “Good hold though, but I could have totally kicked your ass if I wanted to.”

Rory rolled her eyes. “Sure, you could computer boy, what’d you need?” A smile graced her face, watching Tim stretch out his shoulder.

“Bruce wants us all down in the cave, so I came to get you.” He explained. “I think it has to do with patrol tonight.”

Rory gave him a nod “Lead the way youngling.” She grinned.

Tim huffed a laugh. “I am only 10 months younger than you; you know?” He led the way out of the room with Rory shutting the door behind them. The two of the walked down to the cave, Rory trying to memorize the way in the massive manor.

“Don’t worry, I got lost my first few weeks here. If you yell loud enough, someone will come find you.” He chuckled, watching Rory who responded by sticking her tongue out at him making him laugh harder.

“I’ll make sure that I yell loud enough so you can come rescue me.” She smiled, keeping step with him as they descended the stairs into the cave.

When they came into the opening, what Rory saw was much different than the Arrow Cave. First off, it was an actual cave and where those bats at the top? Oli always said that Bruce was one for the flair and aesthetic and boy he wasn’t kidding. The entire cave was dark, but still teched out.

There were several computers set ups, but the biggest was in the middle. Beyond that was where all the vehicles were with an exit to the cave.

Tim looked at Rory and saw the shocked look on her face and laughed again. “It’s a bit much on first glance, right?”

Rory gave him a nod. “Much different than the Arrow Cave, considering this is an actual cave. Arrow Cave is basically the basement.”

Looking below, there was a training section with multiple different assets to it designed to each member of the bat family and their attributes. Currently, Dick was working with Damian on hand to hand with Steph working on her own. Jason sat off to the side, cleaning something that Rory couldn’t see. Bruce was sat with Barbara at the computer, and looked up to see Rory and Tim walking down to them.

“Good, everyone is here. Let’s get started.” He called.

Dick, Damian and Steph all stopped what they were doing; Steph wiping the sweat from her brow. Jason made no move to get up, but lifted his head to see what was up. Tim and Rory stopped in front of Bruce, awaiting his instructions.

“As you might have figured out already, Rory will be working with us during patrol but we can not just send her out into the field without some kind of assessment. I’m not sure how Oliver ran things, but we do have rules here, Rory.” He said, turning his attention to her.

“I’ll be honest, I doubt they are much different than his. Main one is no killing, right?” she asked, crossing her arms.

Bruce gave her a nod. “Yes. I’m going to be testing you over the next few days to see if you are up to par with the others. Each of them fights differently, so it will show how well you adapt to other’s fighting technique.” He explained. “Do you understand so far?”

Rory gave him a salute. “Yes sir, Batman sir.”

Bruce narrowed his eyes, as everyone but Damian fought to keep their giggles in.

“I brought your suit down here already, it’s set up in its own case ready to go. First, we will be testing your fighting skills. Alfred already brought down some clothes for you to work out in. Go change and report back here.” He ordered.

Rory saluted him yet again and grabbed the clothes Alfred was holding and went to change. The outfit consisted of a straight black razor tank top with black leggings and of course black socks and shoes to match. Did this family wear anything other than black?

She walked back, and began putting her hair up in a ponytail so it would stay out of her face. Everyone was waiting for her outside the boxing ring and she could hear them talking quietly.

“How well do you think she is going to do?” Dick asked, his voice still hushed.

“I doubt she will be able to stop all of us, I mean she is Oliver’s.” Jason said, leaning against the ring.

“She seems formidable enough, she put me into a hold earlier. Her reflexes are quick.” Tim explained, crossing her arms.

Bruce stood there listening to their assessments and concerns. “You three are missing one very important point.” He said.

“What’s that? She looks like she can barely lift anything.” Damian huffed.

“I helped train her.”

The boys stood there with a shocked look on their face. They were about to open their mouths to ask questions, but Rory decided that this was the time to interrupt.

“He’s right. Bruce, Dinah and Oliver all trained me.” She said, crossing her arms with a raised brow.

The boys turned to look at her, Stephanie and Barbara trying to hide a laugh.

“You knew she was there the whole time didn’t you B?” Jason asked.

“Of course, I did. Now, who’s first?” Bruce asked, looking between them.

“I vote Jason, he needs knocked down a few pegs.” Tim piped up.

“Why you little-“ Jason started for Tim but Bruce stopped him.

“Go ahead Jason.” Bruce said, with a smile. Jason let out a huff and climbed into the ring. “You coming princess?” he called.

Rory rolled her eyes, and climbed into the ring. “What? Afraid that you’re going to get your ass beat by a girl half your size?” she taunted.

Jason laughed, “I’m not afraid of anything, sweetheart.”

Rory let a grin grow on her face. “We’ll test that theory.” She put out a hand and beckoned him forward.

The two of the charged at the other, Jason reaching for her shoulders. Rory dropped to the floor using her momentum and slid between his legs knocking them out from under him, sending Jason to the ground with a loud thud.

Dick winced, that sounded like it hurt.

Jason got up quickly and charged at her once again, making sure that she couldn’t go between his legs again. Expecting this, Rory went to punch his stomach. Jason caught her hands and turned her around so her back was pressed to his chest, holding her arms tight across her chest.

“Give up yet princess?” he taunted.

“Last chance Jason, give up and I’ll let your comment slide.” She countered, blowing a few strands out of her face.

“Not happening.”

Rory grinned once again and used her strength and Jason’s weight against him, bending forward as Jason flew over back and onto the floor. Wrapping herself around him, Rory had Jason in a head lock on the floor between her legs using all her strength to keep him pinned making him tap out after a few seconds.

Rory let him go and stood up, “Should have taken that chance, princess.” She grinned and grabbed her bottle of water taking a drink, watching Jason rub his neck.

“I’ll get you next time.” He said hopping out, making Rory laugh.

Jason was the quickest to be pinned, with Stephanie, Tim, Damian and Dick following respectively. Watching Dick do all those flips gave Rory a headache, but once she calculated where he was going to land after each flip Dick was down.

Stephanie was hard because she was just as small as Rory was, if not smaller and she could maneuver was easier than Rory had expected. Tim only took so long because he was analyzing her the way she analyzed him and the others and he was able to land a few hits on her. Damian was a struggle because he was smaller than her, but he had extensive training outside of Bruce and he was a force to be reckoned with.

Rory was taking another drink of water when Bruce climbed into the ring. “Ready to go down again, Bats?” she said, putting her bottle down.

Bruce let out a chuckle. “Think you can get lucky twice?”

“That wasn’t luck, you’re just losing your touch old man.” She taunted.

Everyone on the side let out a laugh, quickly trying to hide it. Bruce stood there, waiting for Rory to attack. Rory was quiet and watched his movements with narrowed eyes, the tension in the air rising.

Then it happened all at once, Rory went to land several punched but Bruce blocked them all and grabbed her hand. Quickly, Rory jumped up and kicked him back with both feet making Bruce release the hold on her fist as she rolled backwards away. Getting up, she charged again and kicked Bruce swinging her other leg around to land a hit on his head but he caught her foot.

Rory let out a sheepish smile. “Hey, now Bruce. I need that.”

“I know, that’s why I caught it.” He said and pulled it, making Rory lose her balance and fall to the floor with a thud. “I thought I taught you better.” He said.

Rory let out a chuckle. “You did.” When she fell, no one notice that she managed to slip one of her shoes off. Gripping it tight in her hand, she raised her arm and threw it at his head making Bruce catch it. While he was distracted catching it, Rory got up and jumped onto his shoulder and flipped him to the floor, ending the fight.

Rory stood up again and glanced at the onlookers who stood there in shock. Bruce was defeated by a shoe?

Grabbing her shoe, Rory put it on and hopped out of the ring as Bruce stood up rubbing his head. “Nice distraction.”

“Like you said, you taught me better.” She grinned and took a seat.

#Costly Affairs #Tim Drake #Timothy Drake #tim drake fanfic #tim drake fanfiction #DC comics #Red Robin #red robin fanfic #tim drake fic #Tim drake fanficition #tim drake x oc #red robin fanfiction #red robin fic #red robin x oc

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mildkatfics · 4 years ago

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small talk rating: m word count: 6316 summary: Simon and Baz come to the family estate for Christmas, for the first time as an official couple. read on ao3

I did it with an email. Not even with my personal account. My fucking LSE address: [email protected].

Dear All,

Hope you’re well. I’m sending this message this way because it would be too crude to do it on my mobile, and I didn’t want to wait to be back at Hampshire to tell you. I hope you don’t mind.

I’m gay. Simon Snow and I have been in a romantic relationship this whole time, and we are happy.

I suspect none of you are surprised, but it was getting ridiculous to pretend like none of us knew the situation. I am, however, happy to carry on as always. I just figured it’s time for us to get through this bit.

Regards,

Basil

Tyrannus Basilton Grimm-Pitch

MA Candidate, Teaching Assistant

Department of Political Science | London School of Economics

“Merlin, don’t use your email signature.” Snow peers next to me on the sofa. “Using this account is bad enough.”

“I kind of like it,” I admit. “It reminds them to be proud of me.”

“Remove it. And shut up, they’re proud of you.” He rests his chin on my shoulder. I can smell the coffee on him, though he’s showered after work. I wonder if he’ll ever stop smelling of Starbucks. He glares up at me through his eyelashes. “Say it.”

I narrow my eyes. “No.”

“Baz. Say it.” He rolls his eyes and shoves his body against mine, slightly toppling me over. He hasn’t gotten any gentler over the years. I love it. “Say that your family is proud of you.”

I sigh, but give in. “My family is proud of me.”

“So is your boyfriend.”

I indulge in a sneer, and he throws it right back at me. I say it. “So is my boyfriend.”

He grins, and sits back up. “Right. Now remove the email signature and send it. And remove my last name. You’re talking to your family, not applying for a mortgage.”

I snort. “I’m pretty sure my father doesn’t know what a mortgage is.”

“Here,” Snow takes my laptop from me and removes the signature and his last name from the email. I watch his brow furrow and his lips move slightly as he focuses on re-reading the text. He starts to tug on his hair, and I almost laugh. I didn’t bother spending too much time on the message, but here he is, reading and re-reading every word because he cares. I press my lips against his cheek. I let myself linger, inhaling his scent. Dark Roast. Probably the Christmas Blend. “Don’t give yourself a hemorrhage,” I murmur.

He ignores me for a while before speaking again. “I’m gonna hit send, yeah?”

I don’t take my eyes off him, not even bothering to read it over. “Yeah.”

I watch his finger hesitate for a second on the trackpad, then clicks it. He blinks and takes a deep breath, and I laugh. “Are you going to be alright?” I joke.

His eyes slide over to me. “You just came out to your family. I can’t tell if I’m overreacting, or if you’re...underreacting.” He cards his fingers through my hair. “I also can’t tell if you’re hiding your feelings from me, or if you’re a complete fucking sociopath.”

I laugh again, and I consider his question seriously. “I’m happy,” I think out loud. I make sure to look in his eyes when I finish my sentence. “But that’s par for the course nowadays, isn’t it?”

Snow tries to trap his grin into a smirk. “Sap.” He leans in and brushes his lips against mine. I lean hard and deepen the kiss, and I feel him grin for real and bite my bottom lip. I give an indignant grunt, but don’t bother pretending how much that gets me on. He pushes back until he braces himself against the arm of the sofa, trapping me. I grip his shirt in my fist, only because I would never let him do that to me. And I do it to him, because I get off on that kind of thing. And so does he.

My laptop pings from the coffee table, and Snow breaks away. “What are you doing?” I hiss, and capture his mouth back in mine.

“That’s probably your family.” He crawls back and opens my laptop.

I slump back, keeping my eyes closed. “Is it my father?”

I can feel him roll his eyes at me. “Baz. You read it.” I feel the sleek metal on my chest. I sigh, and I open it.

Dear Basil,

Thank you for your email, and for your candor. We look forward to seeing you both this Christmas. We’ve actually just invited loads of your aunts and uncles for this year. Wonderful timing, isn’t it? All my love to you and Simon.

Also, please remember to bring my mixing bowl.

Sincerely,

Daphne

Snow is peering over my shoulder. “I’ve always liked Daphne.”

I have, too.

—

“I’m not asking you to memorize a family tree here, love.” I’m leaning against the condiment stand, now plastered with plastic snowflakes, a few feet from where Snow is working. The fairy lights around the place sparkle against his skin, complimenting his freckles. I watch the way his arms flex as he pulls chairs back, handles cups and saucers, and carries our conversation with a kind of effortless rhythm that I find really hot. “And you’ve done this before. You’ve spent, what, four other Christmasses with my family?”

“Oh, don’t even try pretending this is the same. This is the first Christmas since your email, not to mention all these people.” He replies without looking at me. He looks up and smiles towards the door when a patron enters, and turns his head back to an empty table. “You have, like, five uncles with loads of kids a piece, who all speak Latin—”

“They speak English too.”

“Not the French ones.”

I purse my lips. “So you have been listening. Don’t worry about them. They stick amongst themselves, anyway.”

“I’ll be right with you, mate.” Simon calls out to the guy. He throws his cloth onto his shoulder and starts walking backwards towards the bar. He redirects his attention to me. “Busy now, I need you to go away. We’ll talk about this at home.”

I give him a pout. I’m six foot two, wearing a Tom Ford coat, and pouting at my boyfriend at a Starbucks. I’m shameless.

His eyes, still locked on mine, sparkle for a second before he turns all his attention on his customer. “Sorry about that. What can I get started for you?”

I let the smile stay on my face even as I exit the shop and head to class.

—

I lay my suitcase and my folded clothes on the bed. I almost ruined a white cashmere on my last trip by putting my toiletries on the same side, so I place it at the very top this time. Then I decide it’s actually better to put it at the bottom of the stack, to keep it safe. So I pull everything out to rearrange. I place my socks in between the empty spaces. “You should focus on your own packing instead of watching me do mine.” I turn to raise an eyebrow at Snow, watching me from the door.

Snow mirrors the gesture, opens his dresser, and dumps a bunch of clothes into a black backpack that he picked up from the floor. “Done.”

I wrinkle my nose. “Will you please let me pack for you next time?”

Amusement lights up his face. “I think I should pack for you.” He sits on our bed, looks at my full suitcase, and looks up at me. “It’s two days, darling. Or is this one of your anxiety-packings?”

“Aren’t you the one nervous to meet my family?”

He groans and flops down on his back. “I’m trying not to panic, but the closer we get, the more I think about it.” He lifts his head to look at me. “Please tell me I’m not the only one. There has to be another cousin’s weird boyfriend or someone who flunked out of uni or whatever your family gossips about.”

I consider it. “Elvira voted Labour in the last election and told everyone.”

“Rookie mistake.”

“I know. Don’t even utter anything remotely political in that house.”

“Great. So don’t mention your school, career, or passions, and we should be good to go.” He sighs before muttering, so low that I can barely hear it, “Bloody hell.”

A beat of silence passes, and I can hear his brain spinning into overdrive. “Snow,” I start.

“They’re gonna eat me alive.”

“They won’t.”

“They will.”

“They won’t.” I look him in the eyes when I say it. “Do you trust me?”

He snorts and rolls his eyes at my low blow. He looks at me for a moment, hesitates, then nods.

“Good,” I say. “Just stay close to me and look pretty.”

He shoves me, hard, and laughs.

—

The drive up to the country is still one of my favourites. Fiona would usually drive me each year in December for the holidays, and I loved watching London slowly disappear. The buildings and adverts fade away. The last minute Christmas Eve shoppers nowhere in sight. The snow on the roads thicker, whiter. Trees replacing lamp posts. The thrill is multiplied now that I’m behind the wheel, with Snow on the passenger seat, his fingers massaging my nape and pulling slightly on my hair. The road is deserted, and I accelerate. The engine purrs with the effort underneath us, and I can’t help but grin. I feel electric.

Snow looks at me. “Are you smiling because you’re endangering my life?”

I raise my eyebrow at him. I can make this drive with my eyes closed. I go faster, and his eyes light up. His finger travels up my nape, and starts scratching my scalp. Gooseflesh erupts across my arms. “You keep this up, and this car will spin off the path.”

“Anything to delay getting there, right?”

My eyes slide towards him. Just as I try to gauge how serious he’s being, he retracts his hand to run it down his face.

“Simon,” I start to say.

“No, s’alright. S’alright, I promise. I think I just need to get through the first bit, then I’ll get in the zone.” I can hear his heartbeat pick up. I slow the car to a halt.

He keeps his eyes closed when he mutters, “I may seem like I’m mental, but I’m fine. I’m great.”

“I’m sure.” I keep my hands on the wheel when I turn to him. “We don’t have to do this, you know.”

“‘Course we do.”

“I’ll turn the car around right now if you’d like. I’m serious.”

“And I’m serious when I say I can do this. I can. Besides,” he drops his hands and looks at me. “I want the roast beef.”

I laugh, but my face settles into a frown. “Are you sure?”

His lip quirks upward. “Start the car, Baz.” As we accelerate, he adds, “Though if Daphne decides to suddenly go vegetarian or something, I swear to Merlin and Morgana we are leaving.”

I smile, and I let my right hand drop down to loosely lock with his left. The rest of the drive is as beautiful as I remember it.

—

When we pull in and step out, there are already cars lined along the path. Snow stretches his arms above his head, his green jumper riding slightly above his waist. I pop open the boot and grab my suitcase, but Snow touches my wrist. “Let me,” he says. I stare at him as he swings his backpack over his shoulder, take my suitcase and the paper bag in his right hand, and shuts the boot with his left.

He takes my hand and starts walking. I roll my eyes. “Are you doing this to impress my father?”

“I’m trying to impress my boyfriend.”

He’s a git, and I love him. “At least let me carry the bloody mixing bowl,” I say, grabbing the bag. I think about how inappropriate it would be to snog him ten feet from my family home. We never did when we’d come for the holidays, but would we start, now that everyone knows we’re a couple? I spot a lamborghini parked near ours, and the possibility dissolves. Fat chance Snow would feel at ease enough to do anything like that.

We approach the door, and I feel the heat and energy radiating off of him. His feet shuffle in place, and he rubs the back of his head. My finger hesitates before ringing the bell. I should say something. Some final words of affirmation, to make sure he’s feeling better—

My eyes widen when Simon shoves me into the wall, and they flutter shut when he kisses me. Deeply. He looks sheepish when he breaks away, stil inches away from my face. “Sorry. Don’t know when I’ll get to do this again.”

I kiss him another time before letting him go. “Idiot.” I let my smile stretch wide across my face as I ring the doorbell.

—

The parlour is already half-full of people, but the staircase is blessedly tucked away when we enter the house. I can see a few of my relatives from where we stand. Most I recognize, and others I don’t. Cousins whose faces ring a bell but have changed since they’ve grown. New wives and husbands. Little toddlers using their magic like firecrackers, sending sparkles and clouds of smoke in the air as they chase each other up and down the stairs.

Daphne shoos them away as she leads us to my room—our room. “How was the drive, darling?”

“Lovely, thank you. The snow’s being kind to us this year, isn’t it?” I can already feel my tongue change inside my mouth. My years with Simon has morphed my vocabulary and made my words looser. More relaxed. Simon’s chuffed, of course; my slurring speech and clipped words are entirely his fault. Here at home, though, it’s like my whole body automatically straightens.

“Oh, yes.” Daphne replies. She swiftly spells the stray toys and wrinkled carpets tidy. The mixing bowl has long floated to the kitchen. “Nothing can be as ghastly as last year. Your Uncle Edgar’s tires had a tough time, remember? He’s got a new car now.”

Ah, yes. The lamborghini.

“Have you got new flowers, Daphne?” Snow asks. This catches me by surprise.

That makes her smile. “Yes, actually. I thought orchids might brighten the place up for the children. You’ll see the poinsettias in the kitchen.” She clasps her hands when we reach our room. “Right. I’ll let you two get settled. Don’t wait too long to come down, everyone’s excited to meet you.” She squeezes Simon’s hand and walks back to the party.

Simon opens the door, drops the bags, and walks back out. “Right, let’s do this.” I look at him. I was planning on showering, at the very least changing clothes. He speaks again before I can ask. “If I go in there, I’m not gonna want to come back out. Let’s get on with it, yeah?”

I hesitate, then I nod. I rub his back while we go down the stairs, as the party sounds get louder. Well, calling it ‘party sounds’ would be misleading. It’s murmurs, conversation, and the occasional clinking of dishware.

Snow grips my elbow before we step into the parlour. “Stay close to me,” he whispers.

There was a time when I wouldn’t say my reply out loud. That was a long time ago. “Always.” I say, firmly.

—

It’s fine. It’s only been two hours, but it’s been fine.

Snow and I entered the parlour, and I don’t know what dark curse is after us, but my cousin Emille approaches us first. Of the French Pitches.

“Basil! Bonsoir, comment ça va?" She had smiled warmly. We always got on well during these events.

“Bien, bien. Et tu?”

We kept up this back and forth for a few minutes, and it became clear that she had no intention of speaking to Simon. “Sorry, I don’t believe you’ve met Simon. My partner,” I say in English. I place my hand at the small of his back and smile at him.

He smiles at her and holds out his hand, right when she goes in for a kiss on the cheek.

The conversation didn't last very long.

As I was steering us away from Emille, I caught my father’s eye from across the room. His smile almost reached his eyes when he called us over. Almost.

“Basil,” He said, gripping my shoulder. “Welcome home.” I nod, and he turned to Simon. “All right, Simon?”

Simon holds out his hand. “Good evening, sir.” He smiles, but I can see his jaw pulled taut. I can feel his pulse picking up. He’s called my father that every year.

I waited for him to correct Simon, to call him literally anything else, but he shook Simon’s hand and replied, “Did the snow give you any trouble on the drive?”

“Not at all. Made it in record time,” Simon replied, while I grit my teeth in annoyance.

“Very good. Your aunts and uncles are thrilled to see you...”

Thankfully, since then, we’ve stayed off to the side as each uncle and aunt exchanged pleasantries and tried their best to casually mention their child being brilliant or athletic or powerful. Each is playing their own game, and they’re all losing. I see Simon intently listening, his eyes darting back and forth to keep up with this pathetic six-person tennis match. I want to rub his back again. To tell him not to waste so much energy for this. That he’s too good for any of them.

Instead, I sip my wine and look around the house. Fiona hasn’t arrived yet—typical. She’d probably bust in at half-nine, after dinner and when the children are about to sleep. I watch Mordelia sit in the far corner near the dining room, her nose in a book, with one of the toddlers curl up next to her. Softie. She’s gotten so tall since I last saw her...

My attention whips back when I hear my Aunt Ariadne says my name. “Are you at uni, then, Basil?”

I uncross my legs and straighten my spine. “Yes, doing my Master’s at LSE.”

I pray she’ll let me leave it at that, and she replies with, “Oh, lovely. Your cousin Rainn is thinking of pursuing one as well. She’s almost done her undergrad. Over at Cambridge.” Good old Aunt Ariadne.

I nod and smile, about to prompt her about her precious Rainn and Cambridge, when my father speaks up. “Have you decided on your dissertation, Basil?”

I try not to sigh when I say my practiced reply. “I have. I’m doing it on democratic theory and fiscal austerity in the EU.” I leave it as vague as possible, and hope the conversation simmers away.

I see Edgar sit up, and I brace for impact. “Good lad. More people your age ought to learn about personal responsibility and the free market.”

I think about my work, the research I’ve poured over, that argues just the opposite. How the time for austerity has long gone. How democratic theory must be at the forefront of economic policy. But nothing can be worse than a roundtable discussion with my dear Uncle Edgar and half the Pitch extended family, so I swerve. “Yes, the school work can be a pain, but I’m grateful for the opportunity.”

“Public discourse has thrown what really matters out the window,” he presses, and I can see his face begin to liven up. “It has corrupted our society. Having Labour in power now, of course, is a bloody nightmare. Giveaways here and there. Iced lollies, penny sweets, thousands of pounds a month? What difference does that make? Throw it all to the wind! There’s a ‘public program’ for anything nowadays.” He makes air quotes with his hand.

“Edgar,” Daphne starts.

He ignores her and starts to speak with his hands. Clearly, he’s enjoying being a world-class twat. “And what will that do with my taxes, hm? Wasting and throwing it to bums and lunatics.”

Edgar’s points are so dogmatic, so cartoonishly cookie-cutter, that I almost laugh, but I feel Simon tense beside me. I gently nudge my thigh against his. Steady, love, I want to tell him.

“Well, dinner’s just about ready. Let’s all wash up and get the children, shall we?” Daphne suggests. Bless her heart. The others heave off the sofa, chairs, and loveseats handsomely positioned all around the parlour, and disperses to different corners of the house.

I start to get up, relieved to eat, when I see Snow stay put. His jaw is set, and his eyes are fixed on a spot at the wall. The parlour has cleared, so I take my hand loosely in his. “All right?” I ask.

His fingers absently toy with mine, but it takes a minute for him to look at me. I’m an expert in reading Snow’s transparent face, but right now, I’m at a loss. He nods, stands up, and drops my hand.

—

Dinner, so far, is hardly better. At least Daphne didn’t go vegetarian.

The table is spelled longer to accommodate all the guests, and it stretches from the dining table, past the archway, and into the parlour.

Next to me, Snow is quiet. He’s aced the table manners over the years, and I smile at the lumps of food on his plate. Underneath the table, I tap his foot with mine, and he taps me back.

This is good. We can do this.

Aunt Willow—A Danish Pitch—takes a sip from her wine and turns to us. “So what do you study, Simon?”

I feel Simon straighten up. “Oh, I don’t, actually. I’m working right now.”

“Like for a gap year?”

“Er, I’m not sure yet.” He chuckles, and he hides his discomfort well. But not to me. “Just reckon I’d spend my time saving up if I’m not sure what I’d like to study.”

“Of course, I think that’s wonderful.” I take another bite, and try my best to look nonchalant. But I already start to dread my family’s behaviour. My body feels like I’m about to enter a duel. “Where do you work, darling?”

Simon hesitates before he replies, “Central London.” I watch his fork swirl around the mash. Willow smiles and nods, and just when I can see her about to turn to someone else, he abruptly adds, “I work at a Starbucks. In Central London. Just by LSE, actually.”

“Lovely,” she says, and I can tell she’s at a loss with what to say next, but that won’t stop her from carrying a conversation. “I tried a scone from there one morning when I was running late to a conference. It was quite good.”

Simon laughs, and I can feel an edge to it. I decide to jump in. “I’ve had all their scones, Aunt Willow. Almost comparable to Watford, if you ask me.”

Daphne smiles. “Maybe someone can give Cook Pritchard a run for her money.”

“Baz, you interned at the Home Secretary’s office, didn’t you? When you finished your undergrad?” I hear my father suddenly add.

“Yes, father.” I reply without a beat, though my brow raises slightly at the question. What is he on about?

“Well, maybe you can connect Simon. He ought to have a better gap year than a cafe, eh?” He’s smiling, but when we make eye contact, I can feel a bucket of cold water splash through me. I clench my fist and I feel a loud clunk on the floor. Simon ducks down to fish his knife from beneath the table. I’m so taken aback from my father’s words that I’ve stopped keeping tabs on him.

I stare at him from across the table. It’s completely quiet now.

“Mummy, will you pass the gravy, please?” An even voice says from three seats down. I look over at Mordelia, with her plate almost empty.

Daphne clears her throat. “Sure, darling.” When Mordelia gets the boat, she sets it down and doesn’t pour it on her plate.

I clear my throat. “That won’t be necessary. I don’t think they’d even remember me.”

He nods once, and goes back to his roast beef.

—

Thankfully, the rest of dinner is quieter. Snow is quieter.

He barely finishes dessert before he excuses himself and steps away from the table. I smile, excuse myself, and follow him through the parlour.

I can tell Snow is trying not to stomp and barrel up the stairs. I can tell his jaw is clenched, so tightly that I can hear his teeth scrape together. He opens the door, and we go inside.

My walls have been permanently spelled sound-proof since I was fifteen. I can still feel the magic I left behind, permeating the wallpaper and the tapestries. A part of my brain appreciates the irony of that; I spell them on the summer I tried to wank my feelings away, and now the spell still stands, concealing the clenching jaw and heavy footsteps of Simon Snow himself. I think I would have been thrilled, had I knew.

Now, though, I feel my stomach constrict, like cold water sizzling against my heated insides. I sit down on the trunk at the foot of my bed. I want to ask him to sit with me, but I know better. I watch him five feet away from me, running a hand through his hair. “You’re angry,” I say.

“‘Yeah. I am.” He’s not saying anything else, but he’s anything but quiet. He takes a deep breath and exhales out his nose. His heart is thumping, and I can hear his blood rush across his veins. He swallows, and I watch his Adam’s apple bob. Like I have countless times before.

When he speaks, it’s barely above a whisper. “I wanted this visit to work. So badly. But those things he was saying. And you listening and taking it, and...and...” He huffs in frustration. It’s demeaning, Baz.”

“Is it Edgar? My father?” I ask. “They’re old dickheads, Simon. They humiliate themselves. Can’t even go through small talk without—”

“That’s the thing,” he interrupts me. His eyes flit to the ceiling, the floor, anywhere but me. “It’s not just small talk. That rubbish he spouts? You think it’s jest?”

“Why do you care what he thinks?” Seeing him so upset is sending a ripple of panic fluttering from my chest. I scramble, and I grasp, and apparently, I break.

“It’s not just Edgar, isn’t it? It’s that whole lot. What would they say when they find out their darling Basil is dating a bloody chav from a foster home? Leeching away his money ‘cause I serve coffee eight hours a day.” He laughs a bitter, joyles sound. He’s still not looking at me. “This is real life, Baz. It’s not small talk. It’s not a chat during a fucking garden promenade at your family’s club. I guess I’d know if I picked up a few shifts there, wouldn’t I?”

Irritation swells in my throat. I think about the Easters, Christmases, summers at the club where I kept my mouth shut when my family makes gay jokes about lads and queers and faeries. He has never thrown my privilege in my face. “You know I don’t mean it like that.”

“Actually, I haven’t the faintest idea what you do mean. Not when you sit there and say nothing.” He breathes again. “It’s not just everyone else.” He repeats. “It’s...it’s you.”

Fights aren’t the same from when we were twenty. Now, at twenty-three, they don’t feel like we’re one shout from breaking up. They don’t feel like Simon will slip from my fingertips unless I hold on so tightly that my knuckles are white with the effort. They don’t feel like the love I had for him was an overflowing static, buzzing through the air and hurting anyone who dares come close. Now, they’re just fights.

But they still fucking hurt.

“Simon, love—”

“Don’t.” He holds up a hand. He stares at a far wall when he talks to me. “Don’t call me that when I’m upset with you. Please.”

I stand there, at a complete loss. He turns around, unzips his backpack, and starts shoving his clothes out on the bed. I can see his hands trembling. His heart is still thumping, blood still rushing. I shut my eyes and start to feel the tears well up. Long before I learned to retract my fangs, I’ve mastered retracting my tears first. But I don’t want to hold them back. Not here. Not with him.

He keeps his back to me, and I stare at it—at the thick ridge, strained and tense. I know he can feel me looking. I want him to keep talking. I want him to yell at me, tell me what to do. Because I’ll do it. I’ll do anything.

I turn around and open the door.

“Your toothbrush is in mine,” I mutter. “You almost forgot it this morning.” I close the door shut, and I go down the stairs.

I blink, but the tears don’t come. Like I said; my body knows when I’m home.

—

When you hang a left by the garage, there’s a brick wall on the side of the house. It’s completely dark at night, and dead quiet. At half-eleven, it would be tricky for any visitor to end up there, and I easily make my way down there without being spotted. It was my favourite spot to sneak a fag. Not that I have one on me. I’d kill for one now.

I stop when I see Mordelia standing near the bins, one leg folded to prop herself up. I see her blow smoke up to the sky, with the soft ember at her fingertips the only light between us. I had no idea she smoked.

I walk up to her and join her against the wall. She looks at me, but doesn’t say anything. “Have you got a spare?” I ask her. I can’t remember the last time we spoke. Surely, not last Christmas?

She flicks open her pack and holds it out to me. I put one between my lips, light it with my wand, take a deep drag, and exhale. I close my eyes and relish the way my head starts to spin.

“Aren’t you going to tell me off?” Standing next to her, I realize that she’s almost past my shoulder.

I shrug. “I was about your age when I started.”

She narrows her eyes and bites her lip, and I think about my life at sixteen. Fifth year. I hope to Merlin and Morgana that she’s not going through even a portion of what I did. I think about saying something to her, or asking about Watford, when she says something that throws me off. “Is Simon never coming back here? After spending a night with the family?”

I laugh, almost bitterly. I never give her enough credit. “That Edgar is a real wanker, isn’t he?” I deflect. She chuckles, and I take another drag. I follow her line of sight and look at the stars. They’re so much prettier here, away from London. I continue talking. “He’ll be alright; he’s always been stronger than me. It’s me who can’t stand it.” I look back at her and give a half-smile. “Do you want him to? Come back?”

I was meaning to take the piss, but she slowly nods. “When he spent that first Christmas with us, I didn’t like it. Not cause he was the Chosen One, or whatever. Crowley, that seems like a lifetime ago.” She takes a drag and exhales. I wonder if our father would blame her smoking on me. “I didn’t like it because you were different with him. Where he goes, you go. And neither of you have any clue. It’s like someone cast ‘Shall we dance?’ on you. And it freaked me out to see you so different. It never changed with every December, you see. Didn’t waver or dampen. And Simon never stopped looking bloody terrified every year.” She pauses when I laugh, and then looks at me when she speaks again. “I can barely remember what you were like before him now. I’ve never seen you so happy.”

I look at her with wide eyes. In the moonlight, I can see how her eyelashes flutter. How her cheeks redden in the cold. I wonder how much she’s absorbed, how much she’s grown up, right under my nose. She puts out her cigarette and stomps on it. Without another word, she turns to head back inside.

“Mordelia,” I call after her. She turns back to me and raises her eyebrow. “Happy Christmas.”

She rolls her eyes, but I can see a smile start to form. “Go back inside. Don’t cock it up.”

—

I don’t know what to expect when I carefully open our door. Part of me hopes he’d be asleep; he tossed and turned all night last night.

Instead, I find him sitting on the floor cross-legged, facing the fireplace. He doesn’t say anything when I shut the door behind me.

I pad across the room and join him, leaving a few feet of space when when I sit. I watch him for a moment in my periphery. He’s hunched over his knees, resting his chin at the top of his knees. I indulge in inhaling his scent. “I’m sorry,” I say.

He’s silent for a long time. In the quiet, if I concentrate, I can still hear the party below us, louder now that they’ve brought out the brandy. I remember the drill, and I hate it.

Instead, I listen to the crackling of the flames. Simon’s even heartbeat.

“I’m not angry anymore,” Snow mutters. He keeps his gaze on the fire.

“I fucked up tonight,” I say.

Simon shakes his head, and I spot a small smile on his lips. “You don’t fuck up, darling. You’re too perfect for that. You miscalculated, maybe.”

He’s trying to lighten the mood, because he knows how. He’s bloody brilliant with that. With me. But I won’t take it. “Simon...”

“We save that phrase for actual fuck-ups, like me.”

“Simon. No.” I shift to properly face him. He keeps his eyes forward, but that’s alright. “You’re right. Those things are important, and they matter, and they were unacceptable. And I didn’t understand that. And I hurt you.”

He hesitates before replying. “Don’t you think they have a point?”

Anger rises in my chest. “No,” I almost growl. “They don’t.” My hands ball into fists, and I force them to open again. I breathe. “Please look at me, love.”

He does. I scoot forward and lean in, pushing his curls back. “You are not a fuck-up, SiImon Snow. I will make a spreadsheet, I’ll write you a speech. I’ll do a dissertation, and I’ll pass with distinction. Because I’ll prove it. Crowley, I will prove it.” Nothing would be easier to do. Would make me happier to accomplish.

He looks down and smiles. He takes my hand from his face, kisses my palm, and laces our fingers together.

“Will you forgive me?” I whisper.

He leans forward and kisses me. “There’s nothing to forgive,” he answers against my lips. He moves to my ear. “I know I’ll never be a fuck-up as long as I’m your boyfriend.”

“Because Basil Pitch doesn’t date losers,” I answer breathlessly.

“Indeed,” he whispers. He moves to my neck, kissing me there. “Merlin, I’ll live up to it. I could be buried with that title, and I’ll be the happiest ghost around.”

I close my eyes and breathe him in. His pulse is so loud, so close to me, that it rings in my ears. I pretend that it’s mine, that we’re sharing a heartbeat. If I had to stay this close to keep my heart pumping for the rest of my life, I’ll accept it. Gladly. Gratefully.

“Do you want to go home?” I murmur against his hair.

He pulls back and looks at me. “Really?”

I can see in his eyes that he wants to. I nod.

“What about your family?”

My lip quirks upward. “I think they’ll manage.”

He keeps looking at me, searching my eyes for hesitation. When he finds nothing, he smiles slowly. “Will you let me drive?”

I purse my lips. “Then we’ll be even?”

His eyes sparkle, lips twisting in wicked amusement. “Deal.”

It’s almost one o’clock in the morning when we step out of the house with our luggage, so I wasn’t expecting anyone to notice. We almost make it past the gate when I hear a voice behind us. “Leaving so soon?”

I turn around. Fiona.

I look at her, unsure of what to say. Of whether or not she’d stop us. She drops her cigarette on the ground and stomps it out with her boot. She rolls her eyes and says, “Just give me a hug before you go.”

I walk forward and wrap my arms around her. When we pull away, she nods at Simon behind me. “Drive safely, yeah?” She jerks her head towards me. “He’d cry if you wreck that Jag.”

I hear Simon chuckle. “I will.”

She nods. “Go on, then. Before anyone sees you.”

I kiss her cheek. “I’ll ring you when we get home.”

“Yeah, yeah. Go.”

—

Turns out, the drive is even better in total darkness.

—

We woke up on Christmas morning at eleven o’clock.

I can’t remember the last Christmas where I slept in so late.

#snowbaz #snowbaz fic #simon snow #Tyrannus Basilton Pitch

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thiswasinevitableid · 4 years ago

Text

Return (OT4)

Prompt for the 28th was: Costume

He might be showing off a little bit, carrying all the suitcases in at once, but Duck likes the appreciative look Indrid gives him as he does. The Sylph is already settled on the shoved together king beds, sketchbook in hand, eyeing the ranger conspicuously when he bends to set Joe’s bag down first, just as the agent finishes checking something off his to-do list

“Oh, thank you, um, honey.” The last word still comes out quiet. Really, the only time Joe says it loudly is when Duck has him pinned to one surface or another.

He smiles to show he heard him, but if he’s being honest his attention has been mainly on Indrid this whole day, watching for signs of discomfort or unhappiness. The Sylph has insisted over and over again that he wanted to come on this trip, that he would be alright, and that they could all stop fussing about this please and thank you.

But that doesn’t change the fact they’re in Point Pleasant.

They’re here for the Mothman Festival, Duck making good on his promise to Joe to go with him. He’s excited, and he likes seeing the agent happy. Indrid seems happy too, and Duck is trying to walk the line between letting him be and making sure he’s as alright as he claims to be. In spite of his experiences in Kepler, Indrid still sometimes takes unhappiness as inevitable, even when it’s his own.

“Okay” Barclay tucks his phone into his back pocket, “my vote is for that cafe a few blocks over; if we go early, we can beat the dinner rush. Plus, even though it wasn’t a huge trip, being on the road tires me out, so I wanna crash soon as I can.”

“That is your only reason for wanting to get into bed sooner?” Indrid sends a suggestive smirk his way, making the bearded man blush.

“Maybe. Depends on what everyone else is up for.”

The answer turns out to be a decent dinner followed by collapsing into bed in rapid succession. It doesn’t escape Ducks’ notice that Indrid stays in his human form and opts to nestle down between the ranger and the agent, holding Barclay’s hand where it’s draped over Joe’s waist.

He wakes up once during the night, the dim light of the alarm clock enough to sting his eyes. In his arms, Indrid takes several deep breaths, rolls to burrow his face into Duck’s chest. He waits to see if Indrid will say anything, but the next sound he hears is a gentle chirp-snore. So he kisses his forehead, and goes back to dreaming.

-----------------

“Having been to the TNT plant plenty of times, I do not feel the need to go on the hayride there.”

“Yeah, think we can skip that.” Duck sips his coffee as they wander through the first few blocks of the festival. Joe’s early rising has them beating much of the crowd, though runners from the 5K jog by now and then.

“Why were you there, anyway? It doesn’t seem suitable for you.” Stern turns them towards the museum.

“The Winnebago’s previous incarnation wasn’t all that far away. Frightened humans are not known for their powers of observation.”

“True.” Joe and Barclay say as one.

They split up soon after, Joe and Duck into the museum while Barclay and Indrid scope out the food booths (“Being in a space with a great deal of inaccurate information about me is not my favorite). Wandering the exhibits, the agent’s fingers slip between his own, and Duck smiles when he sneaks a peek at him. He’s so relaxed, his dark hair out of it’s usual slicked-back state since he wanted to get out of the door quickly, looks utterly at home in his mothman patterned button up shirt, animatedly talking about the displays. Indrid is usually the one of them most likely to dump information out in one big flow, but Joe has his moments.

The building is warm enough that Duck unbuttons his overshirt, revealing the t-shirt beneath. Joe turns to tell him something, and stops, eyebrows zipping up his forehead.

“A little on the nose, isn’t it?”

Duck grins, looking down at the bright red letters reading “mothman is my boyfriend.”

“Juno bought it for me once she found out. Usually just wear it when I wanna make Indrid laugh. Plus, seen three people with similar ones, so it ain’t like anyone is gonna take it as confession.”

Joe nods, gracefully weaving through a small clump of visitors on their way to the gift shop. When Duck falls in next to him, the agent murmurs, “you’re worried about him too.”

“Kinda hard not to be.”

“I know. I’m trying to take him at his word but it’s, well, it’s difficult. It wouldn’t be the first time my interests turned people off. I’d hate for him to get overwhelmed by all this and try to hide it for my sake.”

“He ain’t bad at hidin things, but he’s also real fuckin blunt.” He puts his arm around Joe’s shoulder, “it’ll be okay, city mouse.”

After spending slightly more money than necessary (look, he promised lots of people souvenirs and also he needed to buy a few things for Joe for the holidays), they make their way back into the festival. On a bench near an outer edge, Barclay and Indrid are sitting thigh to thigh, Barclay feeding Indrid funnel cake. He says something and Indrid laughs.

“You know, even though it was fleeting, I’m glad they found each other all those years ago. One of the things I love most about Barclay is how he takes care of people, and I think Indrid needed that.”

“Not gonna lie, never expected the biggest softy in Kepler to also be Bigfoot.”

“You didn’t expect it? Think about how I feel.”

He laughs, “yeah, you got me there.”

They move through the festival as a quartet after that, Barclay delighted with his “Mothman Blend” coffee and Indrid with the sweater bearing his likeness and the words “live, laugh, lurk.” As noon approaches, more and more mothman appear, all in varying degrees of impressive or lackluster cosplays and costumes. Stern keeps muttering about scale, Indrid about wing placement, and Duck can’t help but think none of them get the color right.

“I have an, ah, an idea.” Indrid says, turning a mug reading “I Heart Mothman” over in his hands, “So many people are excited to meet those who look like me. I want to see what happens if they see the real thing.”

“Uh, that seems real-”

“Risky yes, but I’ve checked the futures and there is not one where I am identified as what I actually am.”

Duck and Barclay trade a skeptical look, but Joe has an uncharacteristically scheming glint in his eye.

“I know exactly how we can insure that. Duck, Barclay, wait here please. Indrid, come with me, we need to run back to the hotel.” He grabs the Sylphs hand.

“What are you--oh, oh yes, that is rather clever” is the last Duck hears before losing them in the crowd.

“....you wanna help me pick out a present for Jake?” Barclay still looks worried, so Duck nods and they set off towards a t-shirt booth.

Barclay is mid-anecdote about his run in with a cougar out in California when every visitor in sight starts whispering and taking pictures.

The cooks mutters “If this goes wrong, Mama’s going to lock all four of us in the safehouse for the rest of our lives.”

In his Sylph form, Indrid towers above the crowd. His arms are resolutely set by his sides and head held high, Duck gets a rare glimpse of how his boyfriend must have looked in the halls of Sylvain. All the same, his eyes are drawn to the antenna twitching with nerves as the onlookers get closer.

“If you could just step back from the specimen a bit, thank you.” Joe steps directly in front of Indrid, and Barclay lets out a soft, appreciative growl to Duck’s right. The agent is in a full suit, complete with sunglasses, a picture of handsome, aloof calm.

People in the crowd laugh,take more pictures as Indrid’s “handler” guides him over to Duck and Barclay.

“Do you just pack a suit no matter what, babe?”

“No. I, um, I know how much certain people like it when I wear one. I planned to bring it out this evening but this seemed like the better use.”

“It’s working splendidly. So far. Just keep people away from my wings; I only like it when you three touch them.”

“Roger that. Lunch?”

“Sounds good to me. Lead the way, mister man-in-black.” Duck steps aside so Joe can go first, clearing a path for them, Indrid staying close to the agent’s back. They opt for a waffle stand selling, among other things, waffle sandwiches and something called the “Mothman Delight” that consists of strawberry jam, chocolate sauce, and whipped cream. Indrid orders one, only to ask Barclay to feed it to him to keep up the ruse of this being a costume. The cook doesn’t object in the slightest, though at one point he whispers something in high sylph that makes Indrid poof up with a chirp.

The longer they wander the festival, the more relaxed Indrid becomes, fielding questions about costume construction and wing mechanics with the ease of someone who spent a century constructing alibis for his very existence. Lots of people take pictures with him, Joe shepherding them into poses that won’t make the Sylph uncomfortable. Several inquire as to why he didn’t enter the cosplay contest.

“It wouldn’t have been fair.”

It’s when they’re debating when and how to get dinner that a family approaches. Sandwiched between her parents, a girl of about seven stares up at Indrid with wide eyes, clutching her stuffed mothman to her chest.

“Can, um, can” she looks back to her parents for help.

“She wants to know if she can hug you.” The woman says, as a child wanting to hug a massive monster is utterly unremarkable.

Joe glances at Indrid, who nods, “Yes, if she would like to.”

The girl hands her small mothman to her dad, takes four steps forward, and throws her arms around the much larger one. Indrid does his best to hug her back, settling for putting his hands on her shoulders.

“She’s just obsessed with cryptids.”

“You’re my favorite” she smiles up at Indrid.

“Mine too.” Duck chimes in, resting his hand on the smell of Indrid’s back.

“We’re out here because it’s all she wants for her birthday.”

Joe makes a high-pitched noise at the same time Barclay lets out an “awww.”

Indrid smiles, pats the child’s head, “In that case, would you like to take a picture with me?”

“Yes!”

“May I pick you up?”

She nods hard enough to send her alien-patterned headband down her forehead. Indrid picks her up, holding her while she beams at her mom’s camera.

“Are you liking the festival?” He asks as they pose.

“Uh huh. ‘Cept for the parts where people say mothman does bad things. He doesn’t, he stops them, everyone knows that.”

“She’s gotten in at least three arguments with classmates over that.” Her father adds, holding out his arms as Indrid passes the girl back to him.

“I, ah, I am glad to know the mothman has such determined defenders. Happy birthday, my dear.”

As they turn, the little girl calls out, “bye mothman! I love you!”

Indrid looks back, red eyes a bit watery, and waves as Duck murmurs, “Me too.”

----------------------------------------

Stern doesn’t regret how much he ate at dinner. He;s just glad he packed those antacids.

When he sits up, two bodies are missing from the bed, and it’s only the sight of a note on the nightstand that keeps him from bolting out of bed to look for them.

Indrid and I are out for a late-night walk. Back soon.

-Duck.

“Everything okay?” Barclay rolls over, brown eyes reflective in the dark.

“Yes” he pops the antacid into his mouth, “they just stepped out.”

“O-” the sylph yawns “kay.” Blinking sleepily, he smiles, “anyone ever tell you you’re the hottest thing on two legs?”

“You did, this morning.”

“Good, gotta meet my quota.” He opens his arms and Stern snuggles in net to him, “sleep tight, special agent.”

-------------------------

Duck didn’t see Indrid leave, but he’s got a hunch as to where he went. Still, he almost misses him, spots the silver hair in the moonlight right before a hedge obscures it.

Indrid sits in the middle of the embankment, the Ohio reflecting the night sky in motion. To a passerby, he looks to be studying the opposite shore. Duck knows that his gaze is closer than that, sweeping over air that wasn’t always empty.

“Huh, there was only one future where you followed me.”

“You want me to go back?”

“No.”

Duck picks his way down to Indrid’s side, finding a flat stone to sit on.

“It’s funny, the ways stories change. What they say about me grows further and further from what I say about myself.”

“‘Drid, you know this wasn’t your fault. No more than the Cottonwood or anythin else was.”

“That is the story I try to tell in my mind. That there are things that cannot be stopped or altered, that must only be endured. That was why I gave up for years. Then you and the others showed me that even the worst, seemingly inevitable futures can be changed. And that is good, so very good, but all the same it....it sometimes serves as proof of what I fear; that I could not stop these” he gestures to river, “disasters not because they were unstoppable, but because I was incapable.”

“Do you really believe that?”

“Sometimes. Just as you sometimes worry you could have done much more good in the world had you neglected your powers. I wonder how much of my failure was out of my hands.”

“Drid” Duck cups his cheek, turning his head and gingerly tilting his glasses up his forehead, “You’re forgettin somethin; the cottonwood, the funicular, the end of the goddamn world, none of that was stopped by one person. It took a whole bunch of us, every damn time. You were alone. There’s only so much one fella can do on his own.”

Indrid closes his eyes, inhales and looks out over the river one last time. Then all his attention is on Duck.

“You’re right. I may not always believe that, but I know it’s true.”

“You know what else?”

The smile suggests he does. Indrid leans the few inches in to kiss him, the action dreamlike in its softness. Duck catches a hint of two different scents; a pine tr sop and a cologne. The Sylph is sheltered from the chill by a sweatshirt that started off as Barclays, but is routinely claimed by his boyfriends.

“You ain’t alone anymore.”

For the first time in decades, the mothman smiles while within sight of the rebuilt silver bridge.

“You’re right, my love. I’m not.”

#promptober #OT4: Government Men and Their Cryptid Boyfriends #sternclay #indruck #duck newton/agent stern #indrid cold/duck newton #agent stern/barclay/indrid cold/Duck newton #trans duck newton #trans agent stern

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xonxsm · 4 years ago

Text

pastel || bnha x male!reader

---》 two 《---

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=

class went on normally, with a few glances occasionally being thrown at the [h/c]-male, to which he never noticed- he was too busy daydreaming about kermit and pepe the frogs' forbidden love.

'mi amor,' [m/n] thought to himself with a weird voice, looking at the "man" he formed with his fingers, imagining it as kermit. setting his head on the desk he made kermit kneel in front of pepe, with kermit holding out imaginary flowers.

'i cannot hold this inside me anymore... my beautiful boyfriend, dear pepe, my love, will you marry and run away with me?' pepe let out dramatic tears and nods aggressively, [m/n] about to make both hands 'kiss' before aizawa brought him to his attention.

"we will be choosing a class rep today."

almost everyone started talking at once, mostly about how much they wanted to be class rep and why them people should choose them; until iida shushed everyone by saying they should choose by voting. [m/n] looked lost.

bruh. i just started, like, two hours ago. i don't even know anything about them- wtf lol-

sighing, he doodled the poop emoji with hearts and flies surrounding it before folding it up and submitting his 'vote'.

midoriya and momo ended being chosen as class president and vice president respectively, while iida sulked in a corner. bakugo- an ash-blonde boy started shouting about the people that voted for broccoli while explosions went on around him.

:o boomboom be handsome tho, me hearteu umu

the bell rang right after that. [m/n] stretched, excited for food, but quickly slouched as he realised he had no idea where the canteen was. he decided to just follow the others, and grinned when he arrived, quickly running to the line to get food.

<<>><<>><<>>

PROBLEM, TwT.

holding his tray he walked around, hoping to spot an empty table. there were many empty seats, but [m/n] being the little antisocial bean he is he refused to walk up and ask if he could sit. he was about to leave the lunch room and go eat in the bathroom AlOnE before he spotted a pink-haired and skinned girl frantically waving him over to sit at her table.

grinning he strutted over with his tray, his tail flicking slightly as he sat down beside an electric blonde. "heyyyy-"

"hey! i'm mina. this is kaminari, bakugo, kirishima annnd sero." mina gave him a big smile while he munched on his sushi rolls.

"yoe." [m/n] mumbled with his mouth full of rice, waving. quickly finishing his rice balls he was about to reach for his banana milk when suddenly loud alarms started blaring. [m/n] let out a soft whimper as he massaged his ringing ears. confused voices and shuffling of students filled the lunch room.

"warning: there has been a level 3 security breach. this is not a drill." an upperclassmen stood up, screeching about how this hasn't happened in three years and everyone ran out of the lunch room, [m/n] somehow getting caught up in the crowd. he could feel tears building up, slowly getting harder and harder to breathe. just as he was about to collapse on the floor- a hand grabbed him and roughly pulled [m/n] to the side, slamming him against the wall.

waht. oh shiddy tiddies I'm being pinned against de wall. a flustered [m/n] looked up into curious red eyes. "uh- thankz."

kirishima only grinned, showing off his sharp teeth. [m/n] shyly fiddled with his tie, looking behind kirishima when he heard a familiar voice shout. he looked over to the floating dude shouting about the breach caused by the 'press'. everything was sorted out, everyone stopped running and went back to what they were doing before. [m/n] yeeted himself outta the corner, quickly walking back to the cafeteria with a still grinning kirishima in tow.

walking back to the table where he was sitting before the breach he dramatically dropped to his knees to where his fallen tray was, his food splattered on the ground. "Noooo... me love, me zalmon roll, me banana milk." clutching his chest with a sad look he picked up the fallen tray and food before casually dumping it in the trash can, a happy look immediately on his face as he let out a smol burp, setting his phat ass on his seat.

kirishima only stared at him like he was the most unmanly thing in the whole universe. BiPoLaR MuCh Ay-

"E." [m/n] stated as he stared at the approaching group he sat with before, munching on a bag of chips he pulled out of n o w h e r e.

realising he was probably blocking the standing group from getting into their seats he stood up in shy, his ears lowering as he stepped aside for them to pass and sit down. mina, sitting in the middle immediately pulled him down next to her, giving him a smol noogie before successfully stealing [m/n]'s last chip.

"beach." [m/n] sulked, throwing the empty potato chip bag in her face, to which she somehow dodged and it smacked bakugo square in the face.

"HEY YOU LITTLE-" [m/n] shrieked, quickly retrieving the empty bag, placing it on the side as he shifted away a little. bakugo only huffed and continued eating his food, while [m/n] sipped on a banana milk that magically appeared.

uncomfortable silence filled the table as [m/n] shifted awkwardly in his seat, feeling like he was the cause. he was about to get up, using "i wantz some more banana milk" as an excuse before mina pushed him back down.

"hey, are your ears and tail part of your quirk? ooo wait CAN I TOUCH THEM? THEY FLUFFY 🥺"

a certain green-haired boy across from them listened in, hearing the word 'quirk'.

"yez! me tail and earz are part of my quirk. i can alzo zhift into a wolf, and like, run really fast. and zure you can touch me earz," [m/n] replied, lifting his ears a little as mina pet his ears like how you would pet a dog- as he let out really soft purrs from his throat.

and scribbling intensifies for midoriya.

"you talk weird," kaminari blurted out, his ears immediately turning a little red. "not that its bad or anything-"

"yeh, itz juzt me long azz tongue, it makez it kinda hard to form wordz- zadly i can't control itz length."

but, i have good tongue technology. [m/n] let out a soft giggle before cringing at his own voice, pouting slightly as he felt mina stop petting his ears. IMMEDIATELY turning red when he felt something poking his tail.

"ZLKDFJNKZ WOMAN!" he quickly jumped up, shifting his tail to cover his growing um... area before shooting mina a glare. "DON'T TOUCH ME TAIL!"

then he dashi ran outta the lunch room to the bathroom, feeling his whole body turn hot as the others stared at his disappearing figure confused.

<<>><<>><<>>

[m/n] boredly stared on as midoriya decided to give iida his position of class rep. not even bothering to continue his story of pepe and kermit, he laid his head down on his desk again, yawning a little.

"psst!"

sero and kaminari poked his ears as he looked over. "dude, you ok? you just zoomed outta there."

[m/n] coughed, slightly embarrassed as he moved his tail closer. "yeah, totally finez."

totally did not get a boner because someone touched my tail. ahem. he was grateful for the fur on his ears, feeling them heat up as he buried his head between his arms.

[m/n] was still groaning internally as the others cheered for the new class president, the one and only iida tenya.

<<>><<>><<>>

"for today's hero training we will be having three different instructors; with them being me, all might and another person you will meet later." aizawa droned on about the training, holding out a card with the word 'rescue' with all caps written on it. he pointed to a rack full of suitcases where the costumes were put. [m/n] rushed over after aizawa told them to get ready- he was quite excited to put on his costume which was shipped to japan after it was completed in [your country]. grabbing a suitcase with his name he skipped to the changing rooms, humming.

[m/n]'s suit was rather child-like, but also kinda revealing. short-sleeved [h/c] shirt with a long v-neck that was tucked into a pair of black pants that folded in mid thigh- and of course a hole in the back so he could comfortably tuck his tail out. then some bandages that acted as gloves and socks, and black boots. to top it all off a [f/c] cloak that reached his knees.

he checked in the suitcase, hoping to find a collar but was disappointed to find nothing.

well i didn't order for one to be made, i guess-

he stuffed the suitcase and collar into his locker and quickly ran out to where the bus was, lining up as iida told.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

word count: 1536 words

ahem.. no, [m/n] isn't in heat.

from what i read from other uh more mature fanfics hybrids have sensitive ears and t a i l s. so yeah [m/n] isn't in heat. it's gonna be weird if he is already in heat after he joins yuuei for like five hours.

the pepe and kermit part gave me inspiration, so I'm going to be writing a whole book dedicated to their forbidden love.

. . .

just kidding lol no-

unless~ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

#bnha #mha #bakugo #todoroki #deku #midoriya #kirishima #kaminari #yaoi #anime #manga #malereader #hybrid

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sexcoffeeandkellynickelsfics · 5 years ago

Text

A Birthday Suprise//An Izzy Stradlin Fanfic

Happy Bornday @slashscowboyboots I hope you like your lovely Izzy birthday surprise! 💖💖💖(it’s technically your birthday in my time zone so.....)

“Izzy can you please tell me where we’re going?” Karen looked over at her boyfriend in the drivers seat and sweetly fluttered her eyelashes at him and pouted.

“That would be telling and giving away the whole of your birthday surprise” he smirked trying to keep his focus on the road.

A while later they pulled into the lot at the airport.

Karen quirked her eyebrow at him.

“The airport?”

“Yes......” Izzy drawled.

Something then clicked in Karen and she started to panic.

“What about Violet” she panicked.

“Don’t worry I left a key with Duff and Amy so they could check in on her between their shifts at the bar”

Karen breathed out.

“Oh, oh that’s okay then”

Violet was Karen and Izzy’s 7 week old pup they’d found her through an AD in the paper and had fallen in love straight away and went to pick her up the very same day.

She starting panicking again.

“‘My passport I don’t have it!” She gasped.

“Nor do I have my suitcase!”

“Ah my love it’s a good job I do” he told her patting the top pocket of his jean jacket and smirked.

“And you’ve got a fully packed suitcase in the truck”

“Oh ok, that’s ok then” she smiled gently at him.

“Don’t worry my sweetheart I’ve got everything sorted” he leant over and placed a soft kiss on her lips.

They’d made it through the airport, on to the plane and settled in their seats all without Karen’s surprise of where they were going being ruined.

Several hours later their flight had landed and Izzy ushered her out the airport, stopping and blindfolding Karen he gently took her hand guiding her into their transfer vehicle. Butterflies fluttered in his stomach, he hoped she liked it he’d been planning the trip for months. He always did everything he could to make her birthdays magical. The vehicle they were in suddenly came to a stop. “Are we here?” She asked him.

“Yes love” placing a gently kiss to the corner of her mouth.

He hopped out and ran around to the passenger side opening the door and guiding her out so she had the perfect view when he removed her blindfold.

“Stay here” he told her.

He quickly unloaded the suitcases and payed the driver and made his way to stand next to Karen’s side.

“Are you ready?” He asked her.

“Ready” she nodded.

He untied to the blindfold and watched as his girlfriend’s eyes adjusted to their new surroundings.

She cupped a hand over her mouth and gasped.

“Izzy it’s beautiful”

“It is? You really like it?” He asked her grabbing hold of hand his nerves melting away.

“I do, it’s gorgeous” she smiled tears welling in the corner of her eyes as she looked out over the sparkling water of the sea and golden sands.

“Shall we have a look inside?” He asked her grabbing her had so she’d follow.

Inside where they we staying was just as beautiful as the island outside.

It was beautifully rustic, wooden furniture hand carved with beautiful native patterns, oversized drapes lazily blowing in the hazy sea air, stunning ornate statues and detailed painting decorating the rooms.

Izzy took Karen’s hand again and pulled her toward the table in the middle of the room adorned with the most beautiful vase of tropical flowers, balloons and ice bucket of champagne with two flutes.

“Oh Izzy it’s perfect” she said pulling him in for a tight hug.

“It’s not much but I hope you like it” he asked her.

“Not much, Izzy this is more than enough” she looked up at him.

He reached over her and pulled a flower from the vase snapping the stem slightly and tucking into her blonde hair.

“A beautiful flower for the most beautiful girl on this earth” he whispered.

“Thank you” she looked up at him again tears welling in her eyes.

“For what?” He asked her the both of them gently swaying.

“All this, you didn’t have to”

“But I did, you deserve all of this, you deserve all the world” he told her lovingly.

He pulled away from her and picked up the bottle from the ice bucket.

“Drink?” he asked.

“Please” she nodded.

“I hope I don’t take a light out with the cork” he laughed as he fiddled trying to pop it.

Karen giggled.

She loved this Izzy, no worries, no cares he was relaxed and happy. He was away from the stress of work, the band and the general stresses of life.

She was snapped back from her thoughts as Izzy popped the cork successfully not ruining anything around him with.

He poured the champagne into the two glasses sat on the table and handed one to Karen.

“Happy Birthday my love” he said carefully chinking his glass against hers.

“Thank you” she smiled.

The pair continued to explore their accommodation this time champagne flutes in hand. Karen was in awe of everything, even down to the small details that made the bigger picture. They’d entered the master bedroom and she had momentarily been rendered speechless by how gorgeous it was. The bed was four poster, gold drapes and ties, plush bedspread coloured the same as the drapes and a mountain of big fluffy pillows. Sat on the end of the bed were their towels folded as two swans heads together to create a heart shape. She placed her flute down on the bedside table and stood at the edge of the bed and began to run her fingers across the soft material when she felt Izzy’s arms wrap around her waist and pull her down into the bed, the pair of them sinking into the plushy covers.

“Don’t” she breathed.

“Why?” He asked.

“Cause I’ll fall asleep and there’s still stuff to see” she giggled.

“Fine fine” he laughed.

“How about we freshen up and go for food and drinks?” He asked her.

“Sounds good to me” she nodded watching him unbutton his shirt leaving it hanging loosely on his shoulders and begin to rummage through the suitcases grabbing both their wash bags and heading into the bathroom.

“Hey babe come ‘ere” Izzy shouted.

“Okay” Karen shouted back reluctantly moving up off the bed.

“Look Look the bath has jets like a jacuzzi” Izzy said excited gesturing toward the bath of running water.

“I vote we stay here, sit in there for a while, order room service and watch the sunset from the love seat what do you think?” Izzy asked Karen.

“I think that sounds perfect” she said pulling him in for a kiss.

A while later fresh from the bath and stomachs filled with food they sat looking up at the stars hand in hand having watched the sunset. The smell of ocean flooding their senses and the gentle sea breeze filling the space around them.

“I didn’t bring much in the way of presents for tomorrow because of travelling with them” Izzy spoke suddenly.

“You don’t need to do anything else, this is enough, this is way more than enough” Karen reassured him.

“I did bring you something though” he said rummaging through the pocket of his bathrobe that matched Karen’s.

“I told you didn’t need to” Karen tutted at him.

“I did” he said presenting her with a white and gold gift wrapped box.

She gently tugged at the ribbon on the box to undo it and pulled the lid off, inside lay the most beautiful pair of gold hoop earrings with emerald detailing shaped like leaves.

“I love them!” Karen told him pulling him in by the shoulders to gently kiss him.

“I saw you always looking at them in that store back home but you didn’t ever buy them so I thought I would” he smiled.

“Thank you, I love you” she smiled kissing him again.

“I love you too, I’ll love you always even when we’re just dust and bones in the ground” he told her kissing her sweetly again.

They both sank further back under the throw into the wicker loveseat, holding each other lovingly gazing at the moon and the stars the only sound being the waves crashing out at sea and the breeze gently rustling the leaves in the trees.

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theasstour · 6 years ago

Photo

0201. Adagio.

Sunday, 20 September 2015

FIC PAGE | CHAPTER SYMPHONY | YEAR 2 | WORD COUNT: 6.9k

NB: explicit language, anxiety disorder, alcohol, drugs

VOTE FOR SOY IN THE ROOFTOP SPRING 2019 AWARDS💛

It was surprisingly hot for September. Not a cloud was overhead and the sky was a deep blue, making life seem a little easier to live and the road to London a little shorter. Hawkley had been shining in the light of the sun, and so had the Picot Farm and all the land, forest, lakes, and memories surrounding it. Every waking moment, Y/N had either spent with her brother, in the boat and by the lake, helping her father, hiking, or talking to Tiana over FaceTime. It had been a relaxing few weeks. Y/N had really needed those relaxing few weeks.

As she looked out the window of her family car now, London was rushing by. She was both excited for another year at Battersea, University of London to start, and dreading being away from her family again. Once again, she had gotten so used to them constantly being around her that her now living partly on her own suddenly seemed very weird. Thankfully she would be living with Tiana, Teresa and Annie. That fact was enough reason for her to be walking all the way from Hawkley, Hampshire and up to Clapham, London. This would be the first time her family would see her new house and even meet some of her flatmates that they hadn’t already been introduced to (which really only was Tiana).

George pulled up on the outside of 9 Alfriston Road, the green of Clapham Common showing at the edge of the dead-end street Y/N would be living on for the remainder of her time at uni. The brown-bricked terraced house looked exactly like Y/N remembered it from months before when she had been to a viewing there. There was a small driveway and bricked fence where it wasn’t to keep anyone who didn’t live there out.

“This really doesn’t seem real.” Y/N’s father said, looking at her in the seat behind his. “I’m helping you move into your second flat.”

She smiled at him. “This is a house, dad.”

“Potato, potahto. You’re still moving.”

Y/N laughed, getting out of the car as the rest of her family did. Edward was helped out with the ramp, and Y/N placed a bag in his lap before hoisting one onto her own shoulders. She was very glad she wasn’t swearing a skirt today as carrying stuff would undoubtably make her skirt fly up and her knickers be put on show more than once. Instead she was wearing khaki paperbag waist belted utility shorts, a white linen blend shirt tucked into it, with faux snakeskin footbed sliders. Taking hold of Edward’s wheelchair, Y/N pushed him toward her new home, and then rung the doorbell. It wasn’t a surprise when Tiana ripped the door open, grinning from ear to ear when she saw the whole Picot family stand on the doorstep. She opened the door into he window room leading to the actual front door, squealing a little.

“Hiiii!” She said. “I knew I heard familiar voices.”

“Hiya.” Y/N smiled, waiting until Tiana had stepped out of the way for Edward’s wheelchair before she stepped inside. Once through the front door, the slight swirl staircase leading up to the second landing stood to the left, and under it was a door to a single and small toilet. The door to the right as you entered the house lead to a bedroom the girls had decided beforehand would be Teresa’s. The door was open and Y/N sneaked a glance in at her friend sitting there smiling at her, Y/N smiled right back and waved. She walked passed Teresa’s room, and right opposite to the door to the toilet was an open doorway leading into the living room and half-joined kitchen.

There was no door into the kitchen, just an open doorway about the size of a door, and the living room was lit with natural light through a huge window overlooking the dodgy garden behind a grey couch. The telly was on, playing Friends, and Y/N let her little brother get a good look at her new living room while she did so as well, Tiana talking to their parents somewhere in the reception room.

The living room wasn’t big, but the four of them didn’t need much. Beside the grey sofa were two bean bags – one yellow and one leopard printed – and right in front of them were a small TV on a small white table. They were going to get another recliner and a coffee table so it would be easier when some would host pre-drinks and invite some friends over. The walls were white and the floors of wood, a big contrast to the dodgy student accommodation Y/N had endured for her first year. She watched as Edward took it all in, grinning at the bean bags and the unkept and half-brown garden.

“No complaints so far.” He said, running a finger over the fluffy leopard printed bean bag.

“Kitchen next, Goose?”

“Kitchen next, Maverick.” Eddie pointed in the direction of the doorway leading into the kitchen, and Y/N led him there.

The counters were dark, though everything else about the kitchen was white and quite frankly, very modern for a student house. Just as one entered, on the left, stood a fridge and a freezer. When Y/N opened the fridge to check the availability, the only shelf not being used was the bottom one. Edward giggled and Y/N pinched his shoulder. Two white cupboards hung on either side of the metal fan to the stove, shining in the sun beams from outside. Two identical ones were on either side of the oven as well, and when Y/N looked through them all to see which cupboard hadn’t been taken, she was left with the top left one. A washing machine stood by the sink, old in contrast to the rest of the room, but Y/N had no doubt it would work just fine. As long as she could clean her clothes every once in a while, she was happy.

“This is so much nicer than I thought it would be.” Edward said, looking around some more while Y/N turned the wheelchair around so they could go back to the others.

“Know, right?” Y/N smiled a little as she took it all in once again. “Bit mental that we got so lucky.”

“And it’s right by Clapham Common as well.” Edward continued. “Must be quite expensive, yea?”

“Don’t want to talk about it.”

Eddie chuckled, resting his hands in his lap as Y/N pushed him back into the hallway where all of Y/N’s bags and suitcases were standing now. He glanced up the stairs towards the first floor, but quickly looked away, folding his hands together and focusing on his dad walking in with a lamp in hand. Whenever Edward was uncomfortable or sad, Y/N saw it in the way his shoulders slumped, and how he would straighten his back to cover up for it. Instantly she knew what was bothering him and she felt her heart ache as she looked at the stairs he couldn’t travel. Allison was quick to come back inside and take hold of Eddie’s wheelchair, smiling at him when he looked over his shoulder at her.

“Let’s take a walk around Clapham Common, baby.” She said, pushing him through the doors and outside again.

Y/N sighed, watching as her mum and little brother walked off. It hurt knowing how bad he wanted to explore the whole house, but was restricted in a way that prevented him to do so. George, Y/N and Tiana got to work pretty quickly, throwing bags on their backs and carrying what they could up the stairs. As you reached the top, one had to turn right to follow the stairs to the landing. Once upstairs, there were four doors; two right ahead and one in each direction. Door to the left led to the only bathroom in the house, while the three others were bedrooms. The room beside the bathroom was Y/N’s, while the one beside hers again was Tiana, and then Annie to the far right. It was decent sized, with a window overlooking the garden, a simple desk, closet and a commode, which was right about everything Y/N needed. Walking inside, her father looked around with that smile on his face he got when he was amused; eyes wide, an open-mouthed smile, and figure tall. Y/N watched him for a bit, heart warming as he just looked around the room his daughter would be living in for the next two years. He took in the bed positioned with the headboard against the opposite wall to the door, standing in the middle of the room, and the desk right beside the door. The closet right by the window, and the commode right under it.

“This is great, isn’t it?” George placed the white lamp on the small bedside table, looking around the room to take everything in once again. “Not very overwhelming, but good enough for a student home.”

Y/N nodded, putting the bag down on the floor as Tiana did so as well.

“I’ll go get another box.”

“No,” Y/N took a hold of Tiana’s wrist, her friend turning around to look at her. “Dad and I will do it. I’ll see you in a bit, yea?”

“If you’re sure, babes.” She was about to walk to her room when she turned back towards Y/N. “One more thing.” Quickly, Tiana pulled Y/N into a hug, one Y/N giggled into but immediately fell into. They hadn’t seen each other all summer, and as they stood there tied together like this, Y/N realised just how much she had missed her best friend. It wasn’t that she was lost without Tiana, but Tiana completed her in a way no one else could, and Y/N liked to think Tiana felt the same way about her. So, giving Y/N’s cheek a quick kiss, Tiana walked out and into her own room.

Y/N looked over at her dad who was now stood by the window, looking out at the unkept garden and the terraced houses opposite to this one. She walked over, her dad wrapping a protective arm over her shoulders before pulling her close. Her hand fell on his hip, and they glanced out together, though the sight was restricted due to the huge downy birch right outside. George let go of a deep sigh, squeezing Y/N to him for a couple of seconds before he looked down at her, that same amused look on his face.

“Think this is going to be great, poppet.” He said, kissing her forehead before he walked off to get more boxed.

Y/N walked over to the edge of her bed, sitting down and looking around at the cream walls and grey carpeted floor. It was all so much better than Westbridge, the quality of her house was more than she could ask for. Sure, there would probably be some problems eventually with various stuff regarding the house like mould, bills and stuff breaking, and it would be expensive so she’d have to live off a budget, but that wasn’t something she couldn’t manage. With her flatmates by her side and a will to make this work, Y/N knew she would get through this. An involuntary smile reached her lips as she remembered how completely different she was thinking at this time last year when she started university. It seemed like a lightyear away, yet still like it happened yesterday. Such a weird concept, time was, as it seemed to move differently depending on how you spent it.

Getting up from her bed, Y/N walked over to her doorway and took a small glance over her shoulder and into her new room again. It was a little hard to believe that this would be her home for the next two years, but Y/N knew that she wouldn’t mind a single bit.

Y/N watched her family drive away, waving at them and watching the car till it was out of sight. Crossing her arms over her chest, she walked back inside and closed the door, strolling into the living room where the rest of the girls were sitting. Tiana and Annie in the sofa, Teresa on a bean bag, and Y/N herself plopped down into one and turned her attention towards the telly still playing Friends. All of it felt very weird, as the lot of them had never hung out like this watching the telly, or even lived together like this. Annie sipper her tea carefully, holding it tight in her hands, and Y/N noticed she looked very relaxed compared to last year at Westbridge. It must be the calmness that already radiated from the house, because none of them were big party animals or very loud people, which made their space have an instant slowness to it that it was hard to find in a hectic student village.

“Y/N,” Tiana started, turning toward her in her bean bag. “Did I tell you about some of our neighbours?”

Y/N frowned, shaking her head. Instantly, her head whirled off to all the possible mad explanations to Tiana’s question.

“Well… not necessarily neighbours.” Teresa said, focused on the telly.

“Fine, not really neighbours, but someone living on our street.” Tiana smiled.

Y/N shook her head again, urging Tiana on.

“Finn.” She grinned. “Living in a four-bedroom house as well. Guess who with?”

“Who?”

“Sai, Wade, and Harry.”

Y/N’s stomach instantly fell, and it was evident from the confused look on Tiana’s face that her facial expression had done the same. Just hearing Harry’s name brought a mix of so many emotions it made Y/N a little dizzy. He still sparked of intrigue; still made those pink butterflies in the pit of her stomach go nuts, her heart beat a little bit faster, and hope rise in her chest. But now his name also reeked of the worst kind of confusion; the kind that left you questioning everything they did, that made you annoyed because all answers seemed to go nowhere, the kind that left you hurting. Thinking about him was weird because she both missed him terribly and wanted him to keep away from her unless he was willing to fully explain himself. But by the looks of everything this summer, it didn’t seem he was willing to.

“Y/N?” Tiana asked, waving a hand in front of her face.

Y/N blinked herself back to the present.

“You okay, honey?” Tiana frowned, looking genuinely concerned something was up.

“Okay.” Y/N answered quickly, nodding her head.

Tiana didn’t seem convinced. “Fine. Because we’re going there later tonight. Finn invited us over to celebrate starting our second year at uni. I have a bottle of wine and some Sambuca we could share, if you wanna?”

Y/N immediately felt conflicted for so many reasons it was hard to pin down the biggest one. She was beyond excited to see Finn, Sai and Wade again as she had grown quite fond of them over the past year. Of course, she was buzzing to finally catch a glimpse of Harry again, to know that he was alright and to… just see him. There wasn’t a single thing she wanted more than to spend time with him. But… she also did not want to go there; did not want to see Harry or to have him see her or for them to exchange anything resembling words or a glance. Regardless of how weird this all felt, Y/N nodded at Tiana’s suggestion, knowing that she would only be sitting in her room staring at the wall, thinking about this party if she didn’t actually go.

“Great!” Tiana clapped her hands together, smiling at everyone. “I cannot wait to get fucked off my face. Been a while since I’ve had a drop of alcohol.”

“Then we’re not getting completely toshed tonight, Ti.” Teresa smiled. “If you haven’t been drinking in a while, then I don’t want you to go all out.”

“Fine, fine.” Tiana groaned, leaning her head back against the back of the sofa. “Do you reckon Danny will show up?”

Y/N sunk down to sit on the floor, leaning her upper body against the bean bag while staring at the ceiling. “From how Harry talked about him before, and the bad experiences the rest of his mates had while being at his flat last year, I would say no.”

Tiana huffed. “No one really liked him, did they?”

“Did he drop out?” Annie asked, sipping her tea again.

“Don’t think so, no.” Tiana frowned a little. “Have to investigate that.”

All the girls giggled, and they quickly changed the subject of their conversation. After a little while, Tiana got her laptop, and they all ordered take out together. Though they could have their Chinese food delivered, Tiana asked Y/N if she would mind taking a walk with her so they could rather pick it up, something Y/N was all for. Besides, the delivery fee was a little too expensive, and they weren’t about to pay a penny more than they had to. So, Tiana and Y/N got their keys and cash, and then made their way to the nearest Chinese place up the street from their house. Y/N put her sunglasses on as Tiana did, and they walked in silence until they had passed seven houses identical to theirs.

“This one,” Tiana pointed. “This is Finn and his lot’s house.”

Y/N whipped her head to the right, and it looked the exact same as theirs. Their living room seemed to be facing the street and not the garden, though, because she could just make out a telly playing Top Gear and three heads sitting on the sofa placed by the window. Without even recognising that was what she was doing, Y/N caught herself trying to make out who was who and if one of those heads belonged to Harry. Quickly adverting her eyes, Y/N made sure her hair looked good as they were done passing it, trying to make herself think about something else.

“Talked to Harry, then?” Tiana asked, putting some chapstick on as they strolled.

“No, we…” Y/N paused for a bit, sighing. “No, we haven’t.”

Tiana put her chapstick away, frowning. “Have you just not answered his texts?”

“No, he hasn’t texted me or called me or anything like that all summer.” Y/N didn’t know how to keep her hands as she talked, awkwardly balling them into fists and unclenching them repeatably as she continued talking. “It’s like he’s keeping his distance after what happened. And I did tell him to leave so it’s clear his respecting that.”

Tiana mulled his over for some seconds. “Like he thinks you don’t want anything else to do with him.”

“And I don’t.” Y/N said, her words were dripping with lies.

“But you do.” Tiana knew Y/N just as well - if not better - than Y/N herself. She could tell.

“No, I…” Y/N didn’t know what she wanted to say, didn’t know why she was trying to convince Tiana when she would ultimately crack the code and tell Y/N to stop lying.

“Y/N, it’s obvious you have feelings for the geez. If you want to talk to him, you should.” Tiana was right, Y/N knew that. Every time she thought of him all she could do was let herself drift off to how much she wanted to be with him, how much she missed his company and the way he made her feel when they touched. Biting her lip together, Y/N opted to shut up rather than say what was on her mind. Tiana already knew what was happening inside Y/N’s head anyway. “He wants to talk to you, too. The two of you need to chat everything out.”

“I just don’t want him to be hiding anything from me.” Y/N said, voice hoarse and heart aching as she voiced her biggest concern about all of this. What was he hiding? Why couldn’t he tell her?

“He can’t change who his dad is.” Tiana said, interlacing her arm with Y/N’s. “In due time he will tell you why his da is the way he is and what’s going on, but till then you just have to be patient with him.”

“So…” Y/N chewed on some loose skin on her lip, thinking as they turned right towards the Chinese place. “I should take him back? Should forgive everything?”

Tiana smiled, clearly loving the role she had as Y/N’s counsellor. “I think you should take it slow and don’t rush anything. Rushing things means you can mess something up, make a nutter of yourself by falling too hard too fast, and you don’t want that. Don’t get your feelings hurt, so don’t get your hopes up, don’t feel too much, don’t trust him blindly.” She looked at Y/N and squeezed her arm. “Just have fun with him. It’s obvious he fancies you mad and he wouldn’t do anything to hurt you.” Y/N nodded, biting her lip. “Just take it easy, Y/N, and see what happens.”

“But-“ Y/N stopped herself, clearing her throat as they entered the Chinese shop. “But I’m scared what will happen if we start hanging out again. I don’t want to catch serious feelings only for him to… I don’t know… disappoint me or summat.”

Tiana scrunched her face up and removed her sunglasses, looking at the cashier across the desk. “Hi, we’re here to pick up an order for Tiana Howard.”

“Tiana Howard?” The guy repeated to make sure he got the name right.

“Yes, please.” Tiana smiled, watching as he walked off. She turned back to Y/N. “Sometimes you have to take risks, Y/N. You need to get his side of things, it’s unfair if you don’t.”

“£38,50.” The cashier said, putting two white plastic bags on the counter filled to the brim with containers of food. “Cash or card?”

Tiana frowned. “What? I paid online.”

“Says here you didn’t.” The guy said and Tiana groaned, ready to show him that she had paid. While they argued, Y/N stood thinking about tonight’s events and what would happen. She’d have to look good regardless of the outcome, had to find something to wear and maybe ask Tiana to burrow a pair of heels if she was feeling very in the mood for dressing up. It took some time, but as Tiana and the guy were done arguing, they were finally on their way home. Tiana sighed.

“Anyway,” she said, running a hand through her elegant long black hair. “Might not like that bloke for accusing me of not paying, but I’ll defo come back no matter what. Love Chinese.”

Y/N nodded, deep in thought still.

Tiana looked over at her, sighing. “Y/N, promise me you won’t do anything stupid. Everyone knows you two miss each other.”

“What?”

“What?” Tiana frowned. “You don’t think people know something’s going on between the two of you? You made it pretty clear back in April when you argued.”

Y/N felt her cheeks flush and she quickly looked ahead, shifting the take away bag from her right to her left hand. “I guess I hadn’t really thought about anybody else knowing about us and wondering about us until now.”

Tiana smiled a little, re-adjusting her sunglasses. “We all just want you to be happy. Both of you.”

Y/N nodded.

“So the stupid thing to do tonight would be to not hear the bloke out, yea? Don’t walk the other way if he comes to talk to you.”

“Fine.”

“And don’t let him act like nothing happened, because it did and you need to know why he’s been acting weird.” Tiana paused for a second. “And you need to apologise for not hearing him out in the first place.”

Y/N nodded, feeling a little embarrassed for not having done so at The Junction. “It’s just… it’s been so long since I’ve seen him. It’s been five months.”

Tiana got her chapstick out, running it over her lips. “So make up for it. Talk to each other.”

Y/N knew Tiana was right. She always was.

Mustard, white and grey striped woven khaki crop trousers with a ring buckle holding the belt tight around Y/N’s middle, white square neck tee shirt, and white espadrilles, hair loose and a light layer of make-up on, Y/N thought herself ready for a causal party. She got her phone and walked downstairs where Tiana stood in the kitchen putting everyone’s alcohol in a plastic bag. Annie wanted to stay back – as all the girls had by now gathered that she wasn’t much of a party lover – and Teresa waiting in the stairs. After agreeing on hiding a key outside their house so whoever came home first could leave the door unlocked for the others, the girls were off. Y/N felt dread mix itself with excitement in her stomach, swirling around till she felt a little numb by the time they stepped into the lads’ front garden. Tiana rung the doorbell and over the deep bass coming from somewhere in the hallway, they could hear someone shouting. The door flung open and there stood Finn, sporting the biggest grin and eyes that were already glassy from alcohol.

“My favourite girls!” He shouted, arms open and a beer can in one of his hands. “Fucking finally!”

Tiana hugged him first, Finn laughing into her hair before he went over to hug Teresa who was second in line. As his eyes fell on Y/N, his shoulders slumped and he cocked his head to the side, looking like he was about to cry.

“Y/N,” Finn opened his arms wide as he walked toward her. “Come here, love.”

Y/N beamed as they locked their arms around each other, swaying side to side as Finn planted a kiss to the top of her head.

“How are you?” He asked, voice genuine.

“Okay, yea, you?” She said, pulling away to look at him.

“Drunk.” Finn nodded, giggling a little. “And it’s only fucking 7:30pm, this is going to be a great night.”

Y/N laughed and Finn gestured for her to walk in before him, so she did. Intoxicated by GTA was playing over the speakers and Tiana took Y/N’s hand as they walked over to the kitchen. The whole downstairs area was open, linking the hallway, kitchen and living room. All the bedrooms must’ve been upstairs as their bathroom was downstairs as well as their single toilet. Y/N looked around their white kitchen, taking in the open glass door leading out to the garden where loads of people were chilling. It smelled of something Y/N had never encountered before, making her scrunch up her nose. A strong musky odour, similar to a skunk, Y/N thought, with herbal undertones.

“Weed.” Tiana whispered into Y/N’s ear. “Someone outside. The boys will have serious problems getting this smell out of their carpeted floors.”

“Rank.” Teresa mumbled, pouring some of her vodka into a plastic cup. “I mean, love getting high, but it smells fucking rank.”

“Never tried it.” Y/N admitted, biting her lip as Tiana placed her chin on her shoulder.

“It’s okay.” Tiana said. “Like alcohol more, to be honest.”

“Yea, vodka cranberry.” Teresa moaned, sipping some of her drink.

Y/N laughed, getting two cups for her and Tiana to share their white wine. She poured half the bottle into one and the other half into another one, handing it to Tiana.

“Cheers, ladies.” Tiana grinned, and the three of them clinked their plastic cups together and took a sip. As Y/N lowered her cup, she looked outside and saw him. Sitting in a circle on the grass with Sai and some other friends from his course, Harry sat leaning on his left hand, right arm resting on his right knee as he laughed at something someone said. He had cut his hair, shorter on the sides and some on the top, preventing his pretty curls from forming fully. He was wearing a cream silk tee shirt buttoned down the front, suspenders attached to brown trousers, and some brown leathered tassel loafers. There wasn’t a single flaw to him, Y/N realised, and it hurt thinking that way. Everything about him drew her in, made her want him, and it had her entire body aching with the pain of it all. She missed him so terribly, she always did, everyday she would be thinking about him and everyday she would yearn for him more.

Tiana followed Y/N’s sight of vision, inhaling sharply when their eyes met. “He looks fit.”

“Don’t.” Y/N shook her head, making Teresa giggle. Y/N was very aware Harry was looking good sitting outside in the last remains of daylight, sun shining on his left side profile. “Too fit.”

“Go talk to him.” Tiana mumbled, watching as Y/N sipped more of her wine.

But Y/N didn’t get to form a response because before she could, they were interrupted.

“Tiana, Y/N.”

The girls looked at the person who had just invaded their little space, only to feel themselves take a little step back.

“Long time no see, how have you been?” Becky opened her arms, hugging both Tiana and Y/N lightly before stepping away.

“Good.” Tiana said, taking a huge sip of her wine. “Very good.”

Becky nodded, face expressionless as she let the silence drone on. Y/N cleared her throat a little.

“How about you?” She asked.

“Bloody fantastic now.” She smiled. “Got a feeling about tonight.”

“Oh?” Tiana seemed incredibly uninterested, her dislike in Becky very evident in the way she looked down into her wine while talking.

El, Blessing and a girl names Molly Y/N remembered from Becky’s course, came to stand behind Becky as she said, “Remember how I always wanted to shag Harry all year last year?”

Tiana’s eyes shot up. Y/N felt sick.

“Have a feeling it might happen tonight. We arrived a wee bit early so I could talk to him some before the party started for real.” Becky explained. “I just need it to happen.”

Tiana raised her eyebrows. “That bad, huh?”

Becky raised her eyebrows back. “Do you have eyes? Been pining after that since first night at BOP.”

“He’s not a ‘that’.” Y/N said to absolutely everyone’s surprise. Tiana’s mouth fell open a bit and Becky’s eyebrows that were already raised, raised some more. Suddenly realising what she’d done, Y/N clasped her mouth shut and looked away from Becky and into her wine.

“Jesus Christ.” Becky laughed. “You lot need some more alcohol in your system. I’ll see you around.” Becky’s eyes stayed a long second on Y/N before she walked off. Y/N suddenly knew she had made a mistake speaking to Becky like that.

“Don’t listen to her, Y/N, Harry would never go for a fucking knobhead whore.” Tiana said, smoking literally oozing out of her ears.

“But I’m not going to stop him he wants to.” Y/N watched as Becky and her minions walked outside to Harry’s gang, Becky plopping down next to Harry with that pretty smile of hers. He looked a bit shocked, but almost pleased to see her. “If he wants to do it, he’s allowed to. We’re not… a thing anymore.”

“Literally stop.” Tiana shoved Y/N’s shoulder. “Pull yourself together, bitch, this is not over.”

Y/N watched as Tiana took a huge inhale. “I’m not letting someone whose been objectifying Harry, been rude to use, and caused nothing but awkwardness have what she wants. Harry likes you, you like him; simple maths, just fucking go for it.”

“How?”

“I have a suggestion.” Teresa said, grabbing Y/N’s arm and walking outside, Tiana following them excitedly. Teresa sat down beside Sai who cheered when he saw who had joined them, and Y/N beside her, Tiana to Y/N’s right.

“Been waiting for you lot.” Sai smiled, hugging Teresa and blowing a kiss to Y/N and Tiana each, giggling. “Bene boring here.”

“We came to save your party.” Tiana winked, Sai howling with laughter.

Y/N smiled a bit, glancing at her wine before finally finding enough courage to look at the person beside Sai. Harry was already looking at her. Green eyes centred on her alone. His mouth in a straight line and hands folded in his lap as he sat crosslegged now, hunching over a bit. Something passed between them in those seconds that was hard to explain. Something so complex, of so huge importance, with all the feeling in the universe. Something that could not be described in any words yet formed by letters, or any words yet to be created. It most resembled yearning, the simple sentence ‘I miss you’ but tenfold. There was something stronger underlying those words that made it greater than anything. In those seconds they were looking at each other, taking each other in after so long apart, the circle around them seemed to fall apart a little. Y/N could feel Tiana getting up to talk to someone else, Teresa being deep in conversation with Sai. But all the while Harry was all she saw; he was everything that existed to her. She suddenly felt a tap on her shoulder. Y/N looked to her right.

Someone Y/N recognised as a bloke from Harry’s course was holding something out to her. He blew some smoke out of his mouth and it was then that Y/N realised what it was. The joint. The same joint causing all the musky odour. Y/N opened her mouth, but quickly shut it, not really knowing what to do. If Tiana had been here or Teresa had paid attention, then maybe this whole situation would’ve run smoothly. Then maybe Y/N wouldn’t be making an absolute fool of herself and just staring at the joint like it was the strangest thing she’d ever laid eyes upon.

“Hey, Drew,” Harry’s voice. Y/N felt every hair on her body stand. “Let me have a drag, mate.”

“Breaking the circle, H.” Drew said, giving it to Harry as he reached forward. Harry put it to his lips, taking a long drag before giving it to Becky beside him without looking at her. Grey-white vapour left Harry’s mouth as his eyes met Y/N’s again. She suddenly realised he’d saved her from awkwardly having to take the blunt from Drew and not really know what to do with it. It was going in circle so everyone could have a drag. She had never been around drugs, and though she had never told Harry, he must’ve known by her facial expression that she was uncomfortable and unknowing. Their eyes locked for good almost, because yet again the world disappeared. Y/N decided to take a huge sip of her wine, drink it all in one go if she had to, and then she’d walk over to Harry to have that chat she knew the both of them wanted to have.

“What have you been up to this summer, then?” Becky asked Harry, cocking her head to the side and throwing some of her long brown hair over her shoulder. And just like that, Harry adverted his eyes from her. And Y/N suddenly felt very empty. Harry and Becky talked, the eye contact her and Harry’d had earlier completely forgotten about. He laughed at something she said, and Becky grinned, eyes meeting Y/N’s for a quick second before she looked back at Harry. It was then that Y/N realised she had lost. She wasn’t the person to go out of her way, or to got he extra mile, or to push herself onto someone. She wasn’t like Becky. And right now that was her disadvantage.

Y/N got up, walking back inside the house while gulping down her wine, even though she had over half the huge cup left. Coming inside, she strolled to the Sambuca bottle Tiana had brought for them, pouring some into her cup just as Finn and Wade reached her.

“Fucking get in, Y/N.” Finn laughed, clapping his hands together.

“Sambuca, huh?” Wade smiled, leaning against the counter as Y/N took the shot, grimacing afterwards. “Not the worlds best alcohol, is it?”

“Never had it before.” Y/N admitted, turning around and leaning with Wade to face Finn.

“And what’s your opinion then?”

“Not impressed.”

Finn laughed. “But you’ll love it once you’re drunk enough to appreciate all types of alcohol.”

“Don’t plan on drinking that much am I afraid.” Y/N admitted, trying to give Finn a smile she knew didn’t reach her eyes.

Finn grinned. “So, the lads and I were wondering when yours and Teresa’s next performance is. Would like to get everyone together again to watch you two.”

“This Friday.” Y/N informed. “The Magic Garden in Battersea, think we were going to perform around 7.”

“Wicked.” Finn whipped his phone out, writing it down.

“Loved the last set, though that was back in April so I’m well excited for this one.” Wade smiled.

Y/N smiled a little back. “I can’t wait to start performing again.”

Y/N’s phone vibrated and she noticed Wade’s did as well. Taking it out of her pocket, she saw Finn had created a groupchat with everyone in it.

“Now we can all plan everything, and you and Teresa can tell us when you’re preforming and where.” Finn laid a hand on Y/N’s shoulder, squeezing it lightly before he let it fall to his side. Y/N didn’t notice anything but the deafening bass to Earthquake by Tinie Tempah and the sight behind Finn suddenly. Harry and Becky were walking inside, passing the three of them in the kitchen. Becky were looking up at Harry with the biggest grin as Harry talked, they strolled over to a recliner. Harry let Becky take the seat and he sat down on the chair arm, still talking about something. Y/N’s jaw tightened and she looked away, fully aware that if she had done something earlier this wouldn’t be happening. She wouldn’t have had to watch Becky all smug and Harry actually talking to her.

Finn and Wade were talking about something Y/N had no interest in, and she quickly excused herself before walking outside to Tiana who was still talking to someone from her course. Tapping her lightly on the shoulder, Y/N bit her lips together until her best friend looked at her.

“I’m leaving.”

Tiana frowned.

“Becky…” Y/N said, voice low, and by the way Tiana’s face fell, Y/N knew what she was implying.

“Y/N, he won’t-“

“-I don’t care, I blew it and now it’s too late.”

“Don’t jump to conclusions.” Tiana said, voice stern. “You need to talk to him.”

“Ti, I’m bloody scared to.” Y/N said, voice shaking slightly. “What if he’s stopped feeling the way I do? What if he-“

“-Don’t start, Y/N, you’re going to dig yourself so far down.” Tiana took her hand, leading her away from everyone else. “He likes you.”

“I-“

“-He does!”

Y/N inhaled.

“Now go in there and try at least.”

Y/N felt herself nodding, though her head and entire body was searching for an escape. As Tiana turned her around, pushing her towards the house, Y/N felt her feet moving but she was unsure how that was possible because she didn’t want them to. She walked back inside, gliding slowly towards the living room. But the second her eyes fell on Harry and Becky, seeing Becky laugh and Harry smile, Y/N knew why she was moving on autopilot. She was walking towards the door. For a split second, her eyes met Becky’s who was grinning so big it almost made Y/N want to throw up. She didn’t look up at Harry. Didn’t turn around when Becky asked Harry where he was doing; didn’t dare glance when he stopped himself from following her. Y/N just walked on. Turned left and down the street, eyes stinging.

Once again Y/N cursed herself for being the way she was. Hated that she was unable to fight or to tell someone how she really felt. Loathed the part of her that always held her back. Was sick of her anxiety as it bubbled up her throat, aching in her chest and making it hard for her to breathe. She tried to breathe calmly, telling herself to not freak out any more as doing so would mean her having an anxiety attack. And she was not about to have an anxiety attack because of this. Y/N might not have full control of herself, but she was going to have enough to prevent Becky and Harry from making her break down in the middle of the street.

A part of her waited for Harry to come running down the street; waited for him to fix this so she didn’t have to. But she knew that this time, whether she liked it or not, she’d have to fix what she had ruined. He was obviously keeping his distance because she had asked him to. Now she had to take the next step herself and do something about all of this. But first, Y/N thought as she unlocked the front door and walked inside, I’m going to cry in my room because that’s just how pathetic I am.

TAGLIST

@particularnarry @littlestyles @showk1ndness @sydneysuit @hallwayharry @emotionally-imbruised @fuckyeahimahobbit @beksjewels @harryisadogperson @harryrocksagoodsuit @ifiwereaboy2323 @tiostyles @maroonmolly @harrysroguecurl @awomanindeniall @justsaying20 @ot4narrie @miss-nxvxcaine @sunflowersandrockstars @hard-on-harry @emma070900 @shitibitmytonge @always-jackedup @rainbowbutterflyboy @shegotthesalt @harrytreatspeoplewithkindnesss @mleestiles @bloodcastle30155 @harryskiwi2 @brielyse11 @for-fucks-sake-h @treat-harry-with-love @permanentllyharry @flooome @harryfeatcalum @harrystrugglestache @hydra-barnes @violets-parma @shadowsndaisies @messyherz @dancinglikeamadpersoninthedark @kakaym @loveandyourstrulyh @onedirectionhoe @yes-daddy-i-willl @itsnoneofyourbusiness94 @stylisthazel @givemesomemore @thelux47 @its-all-about-harrystyles @blogjustlauren @friendlyneighborhoodron @stylesfantasy @miraclesoflove @belladonna-styles @cal-king @loviestyles @guccikingstyles

Would you like to be notified when I update Symphonies of You? Tell me here and I’ll add you to the taglist!

#harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles x reader #harry styles fic #harry styles smut #harry styles one shot #harry styles imagine #harry styles imagines #harry styles fluff #harry styles angst #harry styles fanfic #het fic #1dff #HIHIHI !!!!!!!!!!!

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thanksjro · 5 years ago

Text

Eugenesis, Part Four Scene Five: Prowl’s Self-Esteem Is Through the Floor At This Point.

Prowl’s sitting in an office, waiting for all the Autobots to vote on whether he gets to lead or not. It’s agonizing. He’s run out of things to organize.

Interesting that the Institute where the Headmasters worked might be doing some shady stuff. Guess it’s not all just frat keggers and failing sociology 101 at the Institute of Higher Programming.

Though I have to question the validity of a report written up by a guy who didn’t even exist in this universe until last month. Throwback, what are you even doing?

Perceptor comes in with the final tally.

108 for Prowl, 86 against. Oh hey, that’s the title of this Part!

Roberts really likes putting leadership positions to a vote. He does it again in MTMTE #26, when Rodimus invoked the Crisis Act on himself after the whole thing with Overlord happened. Good to know he supports democracy.

Prowl isn’t terribly thrilled about just how many folks voted against him, but at the end of the day, all that really matters is that Kup isn’t going to get his suicide mission.

While that’s happening, the Delphi medics are busy tending to an unconscious and bleeding Optimus Prime. Nightbeat’s in the way, pulling a Kup, until Siren pulls him away. Siren still can’t believe Optimus Prime is actually here. I’m in the same boat at this point, though probably not for the same reasons; his is an awestruck wonder, and mine a dulled exasperation.

Back on the Ark, Ultra Magnus is just plum baffled by the Enslaver having disappeared without a trace, but they don’t really have the luxury to think on it too hard, seeing as their transwarp drive is about to crap out. They’ve got to exit hyperspace.

Sorry if this post reads choppy, the narrative is jumping around a lot here. That usually means things are about to pop off.

Over in Haxian’s workshop, a Quintesson trooper- Q-6 is what he’s called- is watching one of his coworkers get outfitted for the teleport, as Galvatron is screaming his own name down the hall.

Oh, good, we’re finally getting back to this idiot.

Haxian tells Q-6 to go shut Galvatron up. He heads over to the cell block to check it out, when things suddenly go silent.

Curious just how the fuck that happened, but okay.

Galvatron’s gone missing. That’s a big problem.

One of the corpses makes a noise, and Q-6, not being terribly trope-savvy, takes a gander into the gaping wound that is Thunderclash’s chest.

R.I.P. Q-6. We hardly knew ye.

Back on Cybertron, the Micromasters Siren sent out for reconnaissance have just landed their ship, starting the walking part of their journey. We’re following Phaser, Sunrunner, Blastmaster, and Treadbolt.

Little character bung-up here: Blastmaster and Treadbolt’s name are spelled wrong. They’re supposed to be Blast Master and Tread Bolt, respectively. Treadbolt is especially glaring, seeing as there’s an actual character from TransTech with that spelling, and his whole thing is that he’s BIG. I know that’s a pretty minor thing, but after all the intricate character inclusions and references Eugenesis has thrown at me, it’s pretty glaring. I even checked to make sure the spelling wasn’t different for the UK comics. I LIVE on the Wiki for this breakdown.

Also, turns out Blastmaster wasn’t always a Micromaster. He got the surgery in the 90’s. That’s not a canon thing, just a funny little Roberts headcanon. Which makes it canon for this novel, it just isn’t… anything that was established by the source material.

It’s important to remember that, at the end of the day, Eugenesis is a fanfic Roberts sold out of a suitcase at conventions in the early 2000’s. Things start to feel a little crazy if you don’t.

ANYWAY.

There’s bit of banter- turns out Sunrunner can’t read a map- and then Blastmaster reveals that the mountainside they’ve been standing in front of is actually a hologram hiding the abandoned Manganese Autobase they’ll be traveling through.

The Micromasters enter Autobase and crawl into a vent, because Roberts is as obsessed with robots crawling through ductwork as he is with mechpreg.

Mechpreg that I have still yet to see, I will remind you.

The fellas move through the ducts for a while, until they hit the inside of the concentration camp. They take a look, communicating through the inter-Autobot radio.

That bodes well.

Back in Haxian’s workshop, our science-inclined tentacle monster is putting the finishing touches on the tele-armor, when Galvatron leaps into the room and attacks. He’s got Q-6 in a chokehold, which is really unnecessary, seeing as he’s very dead. Haxian immediately surrenders, and Galvatron demands to be sent home. He dons the armor, then makes to grab at Haxian to go with him- he’s still just as paranoid as ever, our Galvy.

Haxian refuses, seeing as the parameters this set of armor is set for won’t allow both him and Galvatron to survive the trip. Galvatron shoots him in the chest, and Sharkticons start pouring into the room.

Galvatron books it.

He’s still weak from the Inhibitor Chip, so he runs, only realizing the layout of the building isn’t terribly conducive to escape once it’s too late. The tele-armor then decides that now would be a good time to be ready to go. Galvatron punches the button, and is whisked away from the workshop

To the Kledji concentration camp.

Talk about out of the frying pan and into the fire.

The Micromasters see him pop into existence, smoking and red-hot from the teleport, and are understandably confused.

The Kledji guards, not knowing that it’s Galvatron under the armor, welcome him with open arms. Galvatron responds accordingly.

Himbo supreme defending his title, I see.

The Micromasters are a bit thrown by this development, but opt to stay on-mission, and merely observe.

Galvatron approaches the prisoners who were being transported when he showed up, and tries to ask what’s going on. He doesn’t get anything out of them, seeing as they’re under the influence of the Chips. Galvatron isn’t feeling too hot himself, but he can’t worry about that now, because more guards are coming his way.

As Galvatron fights more Quintessons, the armor he was wearing gets kicked around until it slams against the grate the Micromasters are hiding in, revealing the aqua fortis the original trooper was supposed to deliver.

Then the Quintessential Flying Fucks show up- looks like the gang’s back together again.

Galvatron is subdued, and Jolup decides that it would be very funny to inject him. Galvatron disagrees, turning into a gun to escape their hold. He skitters towards the grate as well. This grate must be magnetized or something.

The Flying Fucks stomp on Galvatron a few times, knocking him out before injecting him again. Now, they don’t know where the hell is neural cluster is in gun-mode, so they just kind of eyeball it before throwing him on the ground again.

They takes their eyes off of him for two seconds, and then he’s gone.

…

So, Galvatron’s missing, but the grate he landed in front of is off. The Quintessential Flying Fucks remember that Micromasters are a thing, and order the ventilation shafts be flame-cleansed to deal with them. Hope it was worth it to save the head of that faction you’ve been at war with for several million years, guys.

Back at the College of Knowledge, Chromedome and Perceptor are having a little chat about frequency calibrators, like the huge nerds they are.

…Criminy, what body part is that supposed to be? I’ve seen it used to refer to hands before, both in fanfic and canon work- hello, Animated- but here that doesn’t really fit. I’m going to assume arms. It’s his arms.

Chromedome, don’t you lie. You’ve never been happy a day in your goddamn life.

Then Chromedome realizes it’s been nearly half an hour since he last dragged Prowl, so he asks Perceptor why he voted against the guy.

Perceptor reasons that Prowl is level-headed and responsible, but just not…

Chromedome coming for his life. Jesus.

He then asks who Perceptor would want in Prowl’s place. Perceptor avoids the question, redirecting to a very interesting-looking staircase. The stairs lead to a downloading theatre, where lectures were once held. As Chromedome reminisces on his alma mater, Perceptor finds some pieces of equipment that might be of use. Very peculiar pieces, that belong to a teleport system, and certainly not at a place of higher learning.

But Chromedome doesn’t care about that, because he’s just found motherfucking SOUNDWAVE hiding and passed out in a pile of junked computers.

Back at the camp, the Quintessential Flying Fucks are having a meeting about Galvatron. Xenon called and said they’d be improving the Chip, soon as Haxian stopped being grievously wounded. The Fucks didn’t mention Galvatron having escaped, or the Micromaster infestation. With two escapes in as many days, it would really make them look bad.

Then Sevax brings up a really good point: nobody- not one of the prisoners, or Galvatron- has recognized their Decepticon bodies. They’ve seen that they’re Decepticons, but no sense of familiarity, no being called a Cybertronian name, has happened. Just what the fuck were the Fucks before they were Quintessential?

The other two can’t be bothered to care.

Returning to Prowl’s crisis of self, Soundwave’s been dumped on a table, just laying there while everyone argues about what to do with him. Prowl just sort of watches it unfold around him.

Kup, that’s not good gun safety.

Prowl makes the call to revive Soundwave. Kup agrees, much to everyone’s surprise. But there’s a problem! Soundwave needs an energon transfusion if he’s going to survive. A majority of the Autobots just straight-up leave the room at this point, not wanting to give the Decepticon anything. Prowl’s ready to donate all on his lonesome, when a few folks come back to help.

This is why he was dry in MTMTE; too busy giving it all away to Soundwave. The secret fifth Conjunx. Nobody tell Rewind.

Just outside, Kup watches the transfusion begin.

Okay, Kup, whatever. Be inexplicably creepy, I don’t even care anymore.

Credit to u/Araknidude on Reddit for the cursed transformation image.

#transformers #jro #eugenesis #part four #maccadam #Hannzreads #text post #long post #prose writing

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yes-i-would-like-to-be-stabbed · 5 years ago

Text

The Big Sleep! With my Oc

Chris: Last time on total drama island 23 campers learned that they'll be spending the next eight weeks in a crusty old summer camp. The campers were faced with their first challenge: jumping off a cliff into shark-infested waters. While most campers took the plunge, a few were forced to wear the dreaded chicken hat. At the campfire ceremony, it all came down to two campers. Courtney has experience as a C.I.T in a summer camp but refused to jump. And Ezekiel managed to tick off every female contestant at the camp with his sexist comments about women. In the end, the first camper voted off of Total Drama Island was Ezekiel. Proving that homeschool and reality tv don’t mix. Who will be voted off this week in the most dramatic campfire ceremony yet? Find out tonight on Total Drama Island!

(Intro)

Chris blows an air horn into a bullhorn

Leshawna bumps her head on the bunk above her.

Leshawna: Ow! It’s seven in the morning! Do I look like a farmer to you?!

Eva stands listening to loud music as Cody goes to grab her mp3

Eva notices and growls at him, causing him to back away.

Chris: Morning! Hope you slept well.

Everyone looks exhausted except for Heather.

Heather: Hi Chris. You look really buff in those shorts.

Chris:(winks) I know.

Chris: Okay I hope you’re all ready because your next challenge begins in exactly one minute!

Owen: Oh excuse me, I don’t know if that’s enough time to eat breakfast.

Chris: Oh, you’ll get breakfast, Owen.Right after you complete your 20km run around the lake!

Eva: Oh so you’re funny now? You know what I’d think would be funny right now?

Eva walks forward with her fist raised at Chris, while the Killer Bass try to hold her back.

Courtney, whispering: Eva, try to control your temper.

Eva, to Chris: You’re enjoying this aren’t you?!

Chris, smiling: A little. You have thirty seconds.

(static)

Courtney: Okay so that girl Eva has got to get a handle on her temper. She’s only been here one day and she’s already thrown her suitcase out a window and broke a lock on one of the bathroom doors.

(static)

Kasey: Man that girl Eva sure is cranky. She almost clocked me in the head the other day when she threw her suitcase out the window. She’s gotta chill out.

(static)

Chris: Okay runners! On your marks, get set…..GO!

The hot sun is shining down as some contestants start running, while others walk.

Harold: Do you know how much longer?

Some contestants run by.

Gwen: Don’t walk beside me.

Heather is walking before Noah comes by and shoulder checks her.

Heather: Do you mind?

(static)

Heather: I don’t run and I definitely don’t run in high heel wedges.

(static)

Heather is walking until she stumbles upon Owen drinking from a small puddle.

Owen: Can’t….catch...breath….must… have… condition!

Heather: Yeah, it’s called overeating. Look into it!

Leshawna walks by and leans against a tree.

Leshawna: What’s your excuse...you…skinny… annoying ...Oh! I’m too tired for insults.

Chris speeds by the contestants on a moped and is using a bull horn.

Chris: Pick it up, people! If you’re not back by dinner time, you don’t eat!

Heather: Ugh I hate him so much!

Heather steps over Owen, and seemingly crushes some of his bone in the process.

Main Lodge

Some campers are sitting and leaning on tables, as Chris files his nails.

Owen busts through the door with Noah.

Owen: Clear a table, stat!

Leshawna: Ugh, we made it.

Owen is seen giving an unconscious Noah chest compressions.

Harold walks in holding his chest.

Courtney: What took you so long?

Harold gasps.

Courtney: We just lost the challenge!

Harold: I think I’m having heart palpitations.

Kasey: Lighten up Buttercup. Dude looks like he’s gonna cough up a lung any second!

Gwen: Hey wait a minute! If they lost, that means we won the challenge!

All the Gophers, including newly awakened Noah, cheer.

Chris: Whoa there. Hold your horses guys. That wasn’t the challenge.

Gwen: What did he just say?

Chris goes up to a random curtain and it opens. Behind it is amazing food with angelic music.

Chris: Who’s hungry?

(static)

Gwen: After a whole week of brown sludge, I almost cried when I saw that buffet.

(static)

Kasey: I’m pretty sure I died and went to buffet heaven.

(static)

Owen: And then I saw it. The buffet table. It was beautiful! There was turkey and Naima bars and the baked beans in maple syrup. Huh, can I have a minute? *fake cries*

(static)

Groans can be heard as the camera pans over an empty buffet table. Everyone had more than their fair share of the food. Chris stands on the table with a bull horn in hand.

Chris: Okay campers, time for part two of your challenge!

Owen, with a mouth full of food: I thought eating was the second part?

Gwen: What more do you want from us?

Heather: Ugh, the weird goth girl is right. Haven’t we been through enough?

Chris: Um, let me think about that…. No! It’s time for the Awake-A-Thon!

Owen: The a What-A-Thon?

Chris: Don’t worry! This is an easy one! The team with the last campers standing wins invincibility!

Gwen: So what you’re saying is the 20 k run and the turkey eating frenzy were part of your evil plan to make it harder for us to stay awake?

Chris: That’s right Gwen!

Gwen: Man he’s good.

Chris: Move, move, move!

Trent: So how long do you think it’ll be before everyone’s out cold?

Gwen: About an hour give or take?

Owen walks by completely drained with drool coming out of his mouth.

Gwen: Uh, maybe less.

The camera goes outside, as a timer goes up. It fast forwards to twelve hours later.

Many campers are visibly exhausted, Owen is moving around pumping his arms.

Chris: We are now twelve hours in, with all 22 campers still wide awake.

Owen: Woohoo! Stay awake for twelve hours? I can do that in my sleep! Woohoo!

Owen stands still for a moment before falling over and passing out.

(static)

Gwen: The Awake-A-Thon was definitely the most brutal thing I have ever done in my life.

(static)

Gwen: This is the most boring thing I have ever done in my life.

Trent: Could be way worse.

Gwen: Oh yeah?

Trent: I could be stuck here without you to talk to.

Gwen smiles and looks away. Heather looks annoyed.

(static)

Heather: So my strategy is to get two other campers to form an alliance with me and take to the final three. The only question is who I can I find do is either desperate or dumb enough to do whatever I say?

(static)

Lindsay is shown standing on her head.

Gwen: What are you doing?

Lindsay: Trying to get the blood to rush to my head. *giggles* I think it’s working!

Beth: Can I try?

Lindsay: Sure!

Heather: Perfect. Lindsay? Beth? Can I talk to you for a second?

Lindsay and Beth are shown standing on their heads.

Lindsay: Sure!

The camera shows Heather, Beth, and Lindsay talking.

Heather: I have a plan to get me and two other people into the final three and I chose you guys.

Lindsay and Beth smile.

Lindsay: Really?!

Heather: You should know that this is a very big deal. I am placing my trust in you and trust is a two-way street.

Lindsay and Beth nod enthusiastically.

Heather: So you’ll do everything I say then?

Lindsay: Sure!

Lindsay starts squealing excitedly a smiling Beth as Heather cringes in horror.

(static)

Beth: Oh my god, Heather is taking me to the final three! Ah! I’m going to the final three! I’m going to the final three! I wonder what will happen then…

(static)

Lindsay: Speaking of alliances, you know who I think is really cute?

The camera pans to Tyler sitting on a log. Heather pops up.

Heather: Oh no no no no, you cannot date him.

Lindsay: Why not?

Heather: Because he’s on the other team!

Lindsay, confused: Uh-huh?

Heather: You can’t inter-team date. It’s like against alliance rules.

Lindsay: There are rules?

Heather gets in their faces and points.

Heather: Remember what I said about trust, Lindsay? Of course, you can always leave the alliance. If you do though I can’t protect you from getting kicked off…

Lindsay, stammering: No, I wanna be in the alliance!

Heather: Good, then it’s settled.

Heather and Beth walk away as Linsday looks down in sadness before Tyler waves at her.

(static)

Lindsay, smiling: Heather said I couldn't date him, she didn’t say I couldn’t like him.

(static)

The camera pans to Eva listening to her mp3 before she stands up and puts her music away.

Eva: I’m going to the bathroom.

Eva gets up to leave and drops her mp3, Heather sees it and pretends to stretch before grabbing it. Heather goes and sits by Lindsay and Beth.

Lindsay: Uh, isn’t that Eva’s mp3 player?

Heather, smirking: Yep.

Lindsay: Well, isn’t she gonna get, like really mad when she realizes it’s gone?

Heather, still smirking: That’s exactly what I’m counting on.

Evil music plays before the camera pans out to the whole island. The timer reading 24 hours.

The camera shows some campers sleeping, some trying to stay awake, and some “wide” awake.

The camera shows Courtney trying to run in place and then shows Tyler.

Tyler stares at Sadie and Kadie sleeping peacefully before a bear comes and swipes at them from behind a bush.

Tyler freaks out from his hallucination.

Kadie and Sadie hold on to each other while Tyler screams and then slumps over.

Chris: Congratulations campers! You’ve made it to the twenty-four-hour mark! Time to take things up a notch.

Chef pops in wearing a sheep costume and a harp. Chris reveals something under a sheet.

Chris: Fairytales!

Gwen: Oh he is not serious.

Kasey: Oh my god why.

Chris clears his throat as sheep Chef plays the harp. Some campers giggles at him as Chef growls.

Chris: Once upon a time inside this boring kingdom,

Beth yawns. And the camera pans to other sleepy campers.

Chris: was a boring village and inside this boring, sleepy village

The camera shows Cody cuddling Owen’s butt , he dreams of multiple sheep and sheep Chef jumping over a harp.

Chris: filled with very boring children, who did very boring things.

Cody cuddles Owens butt further before he farts. Cody shoots up coughing.

The Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy plays as Chef dances around in a tutu. He throws “magical” pixie dust over the campers to make them sleepy. DJ ties himself to a tree, to keep himself awake, but Chef throws dust on him, causing DJ and the tree to fall over.

Gwen, sleepily: Timber.

The camera pans behind the campers, a clock shows it had been forty-hours.

(static)

Courtney: I figured if I could keep moving I could outlast all of me. I just had to keep my eye on the ball.

(static)

Kasey: Courtney thinks she’s so smart. She thinks that moving will keep her, she’s just wearing herself out. *laughs* Good effort though.

(static)

The camera pans to the Bass, a counter shows that only 5 campers remain awake.

The camera moves across the beach past Justin who clearly has paint on his eyelids, to the Gophers. The Gophers have 6 campers remaining.

Heather to a half-asleep Lindsay: We should talk about our strategy.

Heather elbows Lindsay who jolts awake.

Lindsay: Huh?

Lindsay promptly falls backward, asleep.

Heather: Beth?

Beth had fallen over asleep too.

The Gophers counter goes down to 4.

Gwen: Okay favorite song?

Trent: Hmm, She Would Be Loved. Favorite color?

Gwen: Um… Midnight blue.

Trent: Ooh, mysterious. I like that.

Gwen smiles and yawns.

Trent: Oh, don’t fall asleep. Okay, quick, favorite movie moment?

Gwen: You’re gonna think it’s cheesy.

Trent: I promise I won’t.

Gwen: Okay. The kiss at the end of that road trip movie. You know the one with the guy and the three girls?

Trent: I know the one! *laughs* You like that movie?

A naked Owen walks by the pair as Gwen and Trent look at Owen’s discarded clothes before watching him with disbelief as he walks into the woods.

(Static)

Owen: Did I mention that I ate the entire dish of baked beans and maple syrup. The funny thing about baked beans, they make me sleepwalk *laughs nervously*

(static)

The camera shows Kadie and Sadie sleeping together, their snores are synced up.

Trent, tiredly: Cool, they even fall asleep together.

The camera pans to the night sky. A star shoots across the sky, as Trent and Gwen lay near each other.

Trent: You still awake?

Gwen: Yeah. It’s so weird but I think im so tired that im not tired anymore. Does that make sense?

Trent: I really have no idea. Where’s the Little Dipper again?

Gwen: See the Big Dipper?

She points up at the sky.

Gwen: Follow the handle to that bright star right there. And it’s right there.

She points to the constellation.

Trent: Ooooh, cool.

The camera pans over to the Killer Bass, Kasey playfully gags at the pair’s conversation to a grumpy Duncan, who gives a light chuckle.

Duncan: So what’s your deal, huh?

Kasey: My deal?

Duncan: Yeah, like what were you doing before coming to this dump?

Kasey: Oh. Well, I’m a musician.

Duncan: Oh yeah? What do you play?

Kasey: The drums.

In the distance, Trent scoffs.

Trent: Drummers aren’t real musicians.

Kasey scowls and turns to Trent and Gwen.

Kasey: What’s that supposed to mean, huh?

Duncan: Yeah, Guitar Boy enlighten us.

Trent: Well, it’s just that all drummers do is beat on some drums and call it music. There’s no real pattern! And it’s not even that hard!

Kasey: Oh yeah because moving your fingers on some strings is sooooo hard.

Trent: Whatever, you're just mad I can actually play music and all you do is hit sticks on other things. That’s not music.

Kasey gets up in Trent's face as Duncan holds her back.

Kasey: You wanna say that to my face, pretty boy?!

Gwen is holding an angry Trent back.

Gwen: Guys! Just calm down you’re both great musicians!

Kasey and Trent growl at each other. Before they calm down.

Kasey: Tch, Whatever.

Kasey and Trent walk in different directions. Gwen looks sadly in Kasey’s direction before following Trent Both Trent and Kasey mumble angrily under their breath.

Duncan stands by himself.

Duncan: What the heck just happened??

(static)

Kasey: That Trent guy better watch his back. *growls* I am so a much better musician than him!

(static)

The camera pans to a sleeping Owen walking towards a cliff. He almost falls face first before he spins around and falls backward.

The camera pans back to the entire island. The timer shows that its been fifty-one hours after the challenge started.

The camera goes to a sleeping LeShawna who wakes up when Gwen starts talking.

Gwen: Look at him! He’s like a statue!

The camera moves to a “wide awake” Justin.

Gwen: He hasn’t moved in over fifty hours!

Gwen: Hellooooo? Yooo?

Trent: Yip! Yip yip yip yip yip!

Trent moves his arms around trying to get Justin’s attention.

Gwen: Amazing. Look at the concentration.

Trent scratches his head confused, as Gwen pokes Justin’s cheek. Justin shakes his head and opens his eyes. Revealing that his “eyes” were painted on.

Trent and Gwen gasp.

Eva: His eyelids are painted! I saw it!

Chris: Shut Up! Oh, I gotta see this!

Chris runs up to Justin to see that his eyelids are in fact painted on. Justin smiles sheepishly.

Chris: That is too freakin’ cool! But you’re still out dude.

The counter dings as the Gophers go from four to 3 campers remaining.

The camera shows some salmon swimming upstream, and a sleeping Owen is swimming with them. They jump up the waterfall and Owen jumps too. The timer fast-forwards from fifty-one hours to over eighty-five hours.

Duncan is shown putting a sleeping Harold’s hand into a cup of water. And Harold proceeds to pee his pants in his sleep.

Duncan: Ohhh! Gross, it works! Dude peed his pants!

Harold wakes up and sees that his pants are wet. He gasps and covers his area.

Kadie and Sadie wake up as Noah kisses Cody’s ear in his sleep. They both wake up and freak out about it and run away from each other.

The camera pans to Heather, Gwen, and Trent sitting by the fire. Gwen yawns.

Gwen: Man, I’d kill for a coffee right now.

Chris walks in with a coffee cup.

Chris: What is the matter with you people?

Chris sips his coffee.

Chris: Fall sleep already!

Gwen crawls to Chirs and tugs on his pant legs.

Gwen: You gotta hook me up man. I’ll even eat the grinds!

Gwen reaches for his cup as he holds it out of her reach.

Gwen: Anything!

Chris gets away from Gwen and her grabby hands.

Chris: Alright, you six stay with me. The rest of you go and get a shower for heaven’s sake. You stink!

Heather, Gwen, and Trent stay on the right side of Chris. And Duncan, Kasey, and Eva stand on his left.

The rest of the campers get up to leave. Harold bolts to change his pee drenched pants.

Chris casually sips his coffee.

Chris: I didn’t want it to come to this. I said that to Chef Hatchet last night. I said, ‘Chef, I don’t want it to come to this but darn it these campers are tough!’ And so I’ve come up with the most boring, sleep-inducing activity i can find.

(static)

Gwen: Oh come on. What now? Okay, you know what bring it on!

(static)

Kasey: What could be more boring than sitting in the same place for hours on end?

(static)

Chris pulls out a big red book.

Chris: The History of Canada: A Pop-Up Book.

Chris opens it and a beaver pops up.

Chris: Chapter One. The Beaver. A national symbol and a “dam” fine hat.

The campers all collectively groan.

(static)

Kasey: I can stand corrected. What can I say? The guy’s good.

(static)

Gwen: Ugh, stink.

The camera pans two beavers patting down mud on their den. They’ve mistaken the sleeping Owen as a giant log. Another beaver pats mud on Owen.

The camera goes back to the campers as Chris continues to read.

Chris: Which of course was a precursor for the discussions…

The camera shows a sleeping Eva and then Heather passes out.

Chris:....leading to the war of 1812

Trent is falling forward close to passing out.

Gwen: Trent!

Trent falls to the ground in slow motion.

Gwen, in slow motion: Noooooooooo!

Gwen, in her regular voice: Don’t leave me!

The camera moves to Kasey and Duncan. Kasey is wobbling back and forth.

Kasey scowls at Duncan and points at him.

Kasey: You better win this for us.

She then falls forward and lands on her face. She passed out.

Duncan groans.

Chris laughs.

Chris: Bummer dude. Time for a bathroom break! Any takers?

Duncan seems to hold in his pee as Gwen looks at him.

Duncan: I’ve held it this long sweetheart. I can go all day!

Gwen: Yeah, but can you hold it for another ten chapters?

Duncan's eyes widen before he makes his way to the bathrooms.

Chris: You’ve got five minutes, long as you don’t mind a little company!

Duncan: Fine!

He turns to the camera crew.

Duncan: But stay out of the stall.

The camera crew agree and follow him.

Gwen now sits alone. She groans out of exhaustion.

A few minutes go by.

Camera guy: Duncan, you in there man?

He opens the stall door to find that Duncan had fallen asleep on the can.

Chris is tapping his fingers when someone hands him a paper.

He reads it.

Chris: And we have news! It looks like Duncan’s takin’ a dive on the can. Which means the official winner of the Awake-A-Thon is….

Gwen is close to passing out as she falls forward in her seat. She falls on the ground and Chris raises her arm.

Chris: Gwen! The Screaming Gophers win!

The camera moves to the Killer Bass’s cabins. Eva screams as she throws things out the door in search of her mp3. The rest of the team stands outside dodging the items.

Eva: AHHH Where is my mp3 player?! One of you must have stolen it! I need my music! No one is going anywhere until i get my mp3 player back!

Eva throws a book which Harold dodges but then hits Kasey in the head.

Kasey: Ow! What the heck you spaz!

Eva growls then goes back to searching. Courtney huddles everyone together and whispers.

Courtney: Whoever took it better give it up now before she destroys the whole camp!

Kasey, while rubbing the spot the book hit: If one of us has it why wouldn’t we give it back already?!

Heather walks up all innocently.

Heather: Hey guys. Wow! This place is a real mess!

Courtney: Someone stole Eva’s mp3 player.

Everyone nods in agreement.

Heather: You don’t mean this do you?

She pulls out Eva’s Mp3 player. Eva pops out of the cabin, happy that her mp3 is okay.

Heather: I was wondering who it belonged to. I found it by the campfire pit.

Eva runs up to her and Heather gives her the mp3 player.

Heather: You must have dropped it.

Eva: Oh thank you! Thank you! Thank you!

Heather: Sure thing!

Heather shrugs and walks away

(static)

Heather: Turn a team against their own members? Easiest trick in the book!

(static)

Eva smiles before turning to her teammates who all glare at her angrily. Eva sheepishly looks at them and rubs her neck.

Eva: So sorry about that little...misunderstanding…

All of her teammates are glaring at her.

Eva: Guess no one stole it after all…Okay so maybe I overreacted a little.*she laughs

nervously*

The camera shows the entire island before showing the Killer Bass at the bonfire ceremony.

Everyone is still super tired. Chris sits a plate of marshmallows down.

Chris: You’ve all cast your votes and made your decision. There are only ten marshmallows on this plate. When I call your name, come up and claim your marshmallow. The camper who does not receive a marshmallow tonight must immediately return to the dock of shame to catch the boat of losers and leave. And you can never come back... Ever. The first marshmallow goes to... Duncan,

He grabs his marshmallow.

Chris: Bridgette,

She walks and grabs hers.

Chris: Courtney,

She runs and grabs hers.

Chris: Kasey,

She groans as she holds an ice pack to her head and grabs her mallow.

Chris: Kadie and Sadie,

They grab each other as they cheer and squeal before grabbing theirs.

Chris weirdly winks at Tyler.

Chris: Tyler,

He grabs his.

Chris: DJ, Geoff,

They both grab their and Geoff eats his.

Chris: Campers! This is the final marshmallow of the evening.

There’s a dramatic pause as Eva and Harold nervously look at the plate.

Chris:.....Harold!

He smiles tiredly and grabs his mallow.

Chris: The dock of shame awaits.

She gets up and turns to her team angrily.

Eva: Nice. Really nice. Who needs this stupid TV show anyway!

She angrily stomps away and kicks Chris in his shin.

Chris: Ow!

He recovers and talks to the rest of the team.

Chris: Have a good sleep tonight, you’re all safe.

(static)

Courtney: See? I told you. You can’t like a total raging psychopath and then expect people to forgive you. No matter how tough and strong and fast you are. She’s never gonna have a career if she doesn’t get her act together.

(static)

Heather: So Eva was one of their strongest players and now she’s gone. I am so running this game.

(static)

The Killer Bass are waving goodbye to Eva as she walks away.

Courtney: Bye Eva!

Eva gets mad and turns around throws a sit over them that impales the pole behind them.

Everyone ducks.

Courtney: Jeez, touchy!

Kasey: What a total spaz dude!

The camera shifts to Eva on the boat of losers and it leaves.

Eva: I guess my temper got the better of me again but whatever they just lost their fiercest competitor. I hope they realize that.

The rest of the Killer Bass team stand by the bonfire. Some are roasting marshmallows, while some just stand near it for warmth.

Courtney: To the Killer Bass and to not ending up here again next week!

The camera shows snoring, sleeping Owen in a cave surrounded by Sasquatches. One of them pokes him with a stick and he farts. They all smell it and throws Owen into the woods. He lands and he’s still asleep. And the last thing he does is fart.

#total drama island #total drama #tdi #tdi oc #Kasey #total drama island oc

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leigh-kelly · 6 years ago

Text

What A Feeling (I Can Really Have It All)

Some 80s AU.

Once Santana finally heals from her surgery and the subsequent infection, she goes back to work. She tries not to overdo it, but she can’t help but stay late every night for the first two weeks, just trying to catch up on paperwork and take care of her clients. Things weren’t done her way while she was gone and everything about it makes her crazy to the point where she has Terri hold her calls just so she can deal with reorganizing everything.

Because she has a three day weekend coming up, Santana murmurs to Brittany that maybe they can make that trip to Arizona that she wants to. Brittany squeals with delight and immediately cells her parents, telling them that they were coming. Santana loves making Brittany happy, but the truth is, she’s beyond nervous about the trip, she’s beyond nervous about meeting Brittany’s parents and she just isn’t sure how someone like her is going to make a good impression on someone like them.

“I don’t think you need to pack suit jackets.” Brittany tells Santana when she comes in the room and finds her piling clothes up on the bed. “They totally don’t do anything fancy.”

“They’re going to hate me.” Santana sighs.

“Why do you keep saying that?”

“Because they don’t even put their money in a bank and I am the bank. I have no idea how to make a good impression on them because everything I would normally do to try to make an impression on someone is the opposite of what would impress them.”

“You don’t have to try to impress them. They’re going to love you because I’ve only told them like a billion times how happy you make me. Just be yourself.”

“I don’t know, Brittany. I’ve never met anyone’s parents before...”

“There’s a lot of things you didn’t do before me.” Brittany shrugs. “But I really promise you have nothing to worry about.”

“Is there a hotel close in case they throw me out?”

“Hey.” Brittany steps toward Santana and takes both of her hands, swinging them between their bodies. “If you’re really this freaked, we can totally cancel.”

“But you’re so excited.”

“Yeah, and? If it’s going to give you another stupid ulcer I’m not going to force this on you.”

“No.” Santana shakes her head. “We’re going. I’ll get over being like this on the way there, I want to meet your family.”

Santana is glad that Brittany helps her pack, hanging back up the suit jackets and skirts in favor of her casual summer clothes that she hardly ever wears. She’s still a little beside herself with worry, but she tries to keep telling herself about what Brittany said about getting another ulcer and calm herself down. They’re taking a late flight Friday night, so Santana goes to work and attempts to not snap at everyone in stress, but is largely unsuccessful, especially when Hudson miscounts a massive deposit. When she finally gets out, she meets Brittany back at the house and drags her small suitcase out to the curb so she can hail a cab. Brittany insists to the driver that she’ll get everything in the trunk and Santana just smiles a little as she does.

For the whole ride to the airport and then the whole flight, Santana’s knee jiggles. She knows that Brittany feels bad that she can’t calm her down but there’s a guy sitting right next to them and all it does is make Santana more anxious. Brittany’s family loves her, Brittany’s family knows about them, she just really wants to not look like an asshole when she gets there and considering she’s been beaten down and made to feel like crap for a lot of things throughout her life, it’s hard to feel like she can possibly make a good first impression.

“Brittany!” A blonde woman screams, standing at the gate when they get off their flight.

“Mom!” Brittany runs into her arms and hugs her tight. “Where’s Dad?”

“In the bathroom, of course. And where’s your—“

“Santana’s right here.” Brittany nudges her forward and she reaches out her hand to shake Brittany’s mother’s. Whitney shoves it away though and wraps Santana in a hug.

“It’s real nice to meet you, Santana. Brittany’s been talking and talking about you and we had to see you to believe that you really exist.”

“Well thank you for having me, it certainly means a lot.”

“So formal.” Whitney rolls her eyes. “Just relax a little, we don’t bite.”

Brittany’s father finally comes out of the bathroom and after more hugs are exchanged, they make their way out to Pierce Pierce’s old Buick. When Brittany and Santana get in the backseat, Brittany goes to take Santana’s hand but Santana hesitates a little, nervous. After a deliberation, she allows her hand to slip inside Brittany’s and she holds it loosely, in case she feels like she has to pull it away.

“Damn Reagan.” Whitney spits at the news on the radio. “Brittany, you’re registered to vote, right?”

“Yeah, Mom, super pumped about Mondale.”

Santana doesn’t mention her politics and she hopes that Brittany doesn’t either. She just sits quietly looking out the window at the Arizona landscape in the dark. She’s surprised when the pull up to a suburban house, even though she knows that the Pierces have given up their commune days for suburbia, it’s still hard to picture them there. She gets out of the car and gets the bags out of the trunk, telling Brittany she’s got it under control, and then following Pierce inside. The house smells vaguely of marijuana but Santana doesn’t comment. She just accepts the glass of Southern Comfort that Pierce hands to her and sits down beside Brittany on the floral couch.

“So a banker, huh?” Whitney asks and Santana feels as if she’s under a microscope.

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Ma’am? Honey, nobody in the world is going to call me ma’am. I’m just Whitney, plain and simple.”

“Okay...Whitney.”

“Mom, Santana’s family’s really formal, cut her a little slack.”

“I’m cutting her lots of slack, I just want her to feel like she’s at home here and to stop looking so nervous around us.”

“Babe, seriously though, you can relax.” Brittany nudges her side. “They don’t bite.”

“I’m cool, I’m relaxed.”

“You look about as relaxed as a mouse in a room full of cats.” Pierce chuckles. “Maybe we should—“

“Dad, don’t offer my girlfriend pot.” Brittany shakes her head and Santana’s jaw drops. “I think we should go up to bed, we had a long flight and Santana worked all day.”

“Look what you did, Pierce.” Whitney chides him. “I told you not to do that.”

“Whitney, it’s no big deal, really. We’re just really tired, but we’ll get to know each other tomorrow.”

Santana gets up to Brittany’s old room and she looks around at the posters and memorabilia that litters the room. It feels very much Brittany and she has to smile, sometimes forgetting how much younger her girlfriend is than she. While Brittany is in the bathroom, Santana changes into her pajamas and feels suddenly nervous about sharing a bed with Brittany in her parents’ house. She knows they’re not exactly conventional, but still, it feels strange and when Brittany comes out of the bathroom she finds Santana wringing her hands.

“What the matter, babe?” Brittany cocks her head to the side.

“Nothing, it’s just like...we’re going to sleep together?”

“Um, duh, we sleep together every night.”

“Are you sure your parents wouldn’t be more comfortable if I slept on the couch?”

“My parents would definitely not be. They’re probably down there smoking right now anyway.”

“They just...do that around you?”

“When I was a kid they didn’t. But once I hit sixteen I guess the figured I was old enough to know what was up.” Brittany shrugs. “I smoked a few times in high school, it just made me more spacey than normal, I don’t get why they like it.”

“I’ve never done it.”

“Nothing about that confession surprises me. Come here, you’re all scrunched up tonight, you just need to lay down with me and relax.”

“I will, let me just brush and floss first.”

Santana goes into the bathroom and she feels like she has to psych herself up for laying down with Brittany in her childhood bed. She knows that Brittany’s parents know they live together, but the idea of being out is just so foreign to her that it’s hard to process. She finishes up in the bathroom and she goes back down the hall to Brittany’s room where she’s under the covers. Santana carefully closes and locks the door before she slips in beside her, fidgeting once she does.

“Are you really freaked out?” Brittany asks.

“A little, yeah. You’re sure they’re fine with us...and with me...?”

“I’m totally sure, they’re all like, love is love, they’ve never had a problem with me being into girls.”

“It’s just so weird for me. I don’t know how to process it.”

“Just relax a little, you can be yourself this weekend, Santana.” Brittany kisses the crown of her head. “You deserve that.”

“I’m trying. I just don’t know how to be myself outside of our house. The idea that your parents are okay with this is so foreign to me.”

“Does it upset you?”

“No, I mean, I want the world for you. I just don’t know how to be myself when I spend most of my life hiding it.”

“Start with this.” Brittany kisses Santana’s lips. “We’re alone, you can kiss me.”

“I love kissing you.”

“I know. And I like, never expect you to do it in front of my parents, but right now, it’s just us.”

“They’re really welcoming.”

“They know I’m happy with you. I’ve told them that a thousand times. They’re...weird and they weren’t exactly the most attentive parents when I was growing up, but they do actually care about me, in their own way.”

“It’s...strange to me that they weren’t on top of you. That’s the experience I had, it’s the experience I still have.”

“I guess I raised myself mostly, they do their thing, I don’t know.”

“You sound sad about that.” Santana snuggles closer to Brittany, wrapping her arms around her waist.

“I’m...fine about it. I guess it’s just not the idyllic family that you see it as, you know?”

“I didn’t realize...”

“They love me, I’m grateful for that.”

“You’re still allowed to have other feelings, you know.”

“I know.” Brittany snuggles closer to Santana. “They’re the best parents they know how to be. I mean, my dad totally was cool with raising me even though I’m not his biological kid and my mom...well, they moved to the suburbs and out of the commune, so that’s saying something.”

“It is.” Santana nods. “But if there’s ever anything—“

“I know.” Brittany kisses her. “I’m good though.”

The next morning, Santana wakes up before Brittany. She stays in bed though, uncomfortable with going downstairs without her. She’s unsure what to make of Brittany’s parents and she’s just not ready to interact with them alone. So she closes her eyes and she listens to Brittany’s heartbeat, waiting until she grumbles her morning noises and she wakes up. Santana smiles at her when she does and they go in the bathroom together to brush their teeth. As much as Santana has been worried, the Pierces aren’t even up when they get downstairs and Brittany starts the coffee pot, pouring Santana a cup when she’s ready.

“They’ll sleep late. My dad is off the week and my mom makes jewelry so...she’s on her own schedule.”

“I really wish I got to meet your sister.”

“Me too. But now that she’s at Berkeley, she like, never comes home.”

“That’s impressive though, she must be really smart.”

“She totally is. Once you meet her, you guys can totally talk about smart people stuff. I don’t know when you want to come back...”

“Whenever you do, Brittany. I don’t want to hold you back from seeing your family and I’d prefer not to spend holidays with mine.”

“Maybe Christmas. We’ll see what work looks like for you.”

“I know, it’s so hard for me to take time off now that I just took the time off for the surgery. But it’s a holiday, so I should be able to.”

“Even if we only come for a few days. I just like, don’t want it to be too much on you. The last thing I need is you getting more ulcers because of me.”

“If anything, my ulcers would be worse if I didn’t have you around. You really just...I don’t thank you enough.”

“Quit being silly, you don’t have to thank me.”

“You just took care of me while I healed and you’ve brought me to meet your family. When I realized I was a lesbian, those are things I thought I’d never get to have.” Santana blinks rapidly, trying to keep from getting too emotional. “But with you, I have almost everything.”

“You know if I could give you the rest, I would.”

“What I have is enough. You are enough.”

Before Brittany says anything in response, Whitney comes down the stairs and Santana stiffens up, nervous again. She thinks that being too formal is the thing that makes the Pierces most uncomfortable but she just can’t help herself. Her parents raised her to be nervous around authority figures and even though she’s in her thirties, the Pierces are her girlfriend’s parents and all she can think to do is demonstrate her propriety.

“So what are you girls up to today?” Whitney asks, wrinkling her nose at the smell of coffee.

“I was going to ask to borrow your car, show Santana around and stuff, let her see where I grew up.”

“Go ahead. I’m going to make a tofu stir fry for dinner so be home in time for that.”

“I doubt we’ll be gone all day.” Brittany shrugs. “Unless there’s something you want to do, babe?”

“I’m just here for you.” Santana shakes her head. “The biggest thing I wanted to do was meet your family and I’ve already done that.”

“You’re cute.”

“Brittany.”

“What? My mom can totally see that you are too.”

Though Santana had gotten dressed before she’d come downstairs, Brittany hadn’t and she goes upstairs to change, leaving Santana in the kitchen with Whitney. She fidgets in her seat and wakes for Whitney to say something, nervous that she’s going to answer a question wrong, nervous that she’ll somehow embarrass Brittany to her family. It’s hard being nervous all the time and she knows she shouldn’t be, knows her health depends on it, but she honestly can’t help herself.

“So you must really love her, huh?” Whitney finally speaks to her after several minute of uncomfortable silence.

“I do. I try to show it to her as best as I can.”

“She tells me about it. I definitely wouldn’t have pictured her ending up with someone like you, you know, rich, conservative, but since she loves you, I won’t hold it against you.”

“If it’s any consolation, I never expected to end up with someone like her either. But it was almost like from the moment I saw her, I knew I was going to love her forever.”

“That’s cute.” Whitney smiles a little. “At least something worked out for her in New York.”

“Her career will work out too, I think, it’ll just take some time.”

When Brittany comes downstairs again, she’s ready to go and Santana gets in the passenger seat of her mom’s car. Brittany speeds down the block and Santana holds onto the handle above the door, totally nervous about being in the car with her though she’s been on the motorcycle enough times to know that Brittany is actually a really safe driver.

“I don’t really have anything I care enough to show you, I just figured your stomach might explode if you stayed in the house with my parents all day.”

“Britt, we came here to visit them.”

“Yeah, so? We’ve got time. I just figured I’d drive around town for awhile, let you get some of your nervous energy out.”

“You’re too good to me.”

“To be honest, it’s a lot for me to spend all day with them too. I’ll drive by and show you my high school and stuff if you feel like it, maybe take you to the diner I used to go to so we can get like, burgers or something?”

“That sounds really good.” Santana smiles, taking Brittany’s hand on the gearshift. “Are you happy to be back?”

“It’s nice to see my parents but New York is more my speed. I left nowheresville Arizona because I thought I’d make it big in the city. I guess I’m not totally there yet.”

“You’ll get there, I know it. Carl is going to promote you next year and then you’ll be like, the greatest dance teacher New York has ever seen. When you get there, screw Rachel Berry, people will be offering you parts left and right.”

“You really have faith in me, huh?”

“So much. I know you’re the most talented person I’ve ever seen and I go to the theater enough to be able to judge.”

“That means more to me than you even know. Even if I never make it big, knowing that you believe in me...”

“You always believe in me too, Britt. This is what a healthy relationship looks like, I guess. Is that your school?”

“Yup, that’s where I went to high school. Feels like forever ago.”

“You’ve made such a new life since then. I bet they wouldn’t even recognize you.”

“Definitely not, I mean, even my teased hair. My mom wouldn’t let me cut it basically forever so I wore a long braid with flowers on it.”

“Product of your flower child parents.” Santana laughs. “I’m pretty sure my parents were calling your parents communists before you were ever born.”

“And yet their daughters fell in love.”

“Against all odds, huh?”

“Opposites attract.” Santana brand, wishing she could just kiss Brittany. “You’re certainly my opposite.”

“And you love every second of it.”

“Oh, how I do.”

They drive around for a long while and then, after the burgers Brittany promised, they head back to the Pierces’ house. Santana notices that Brittany’s dad’s car is back in the driveway and she swallows hard, nervous to be around both of her parents again. She takes a deep breath and she gets out of the car, trailing behind Brittany as they go to the front door. Whitney and Pierce are laughing on the couch when they come in and Santana gives them her warmest smile, trying to just fit in so outside of her element.

“Brittany.” Pierce stands up. “You know my friend Frances is starting a new commune in upstate New York, all women.”

“No thanks, Dad. I know you and mom were really into it, but it’s totally not for me. Besides, Santana has a house and a really good job, we’re not just going to ditch that.”

“Are you sure? You know, we really loved living on the commune.”

“I know, Dad. I spent the first four years of my life there. It’s just not for me though.”

“She’s become so New York, hasn’t she?” Whitney laments. “One that’s so New York, one that’s so San Francisco. The bastions of capitalist culture.”

“Ma, seriously? You promised when I went to New York there would be no guilt trips.”

“I know, I know. It’s just—“

“It’s just nothing.” Brittany rolls her eyes. “I love the city, I love my girlfriend. That’s it.”

Santana feels really uncomfortable around Brittany’s parents for the rest of the day. She thinks about what Brittany sort of said last night and then she considers the fact that maybe her parents aren’t the only ones imprisoning her with their ideas. Brittany’s parents are more accepting, sure, but they have this vision for Brittany that she doesn’t necessarily fit into either and she feels a pang in her chest for her girlfriend who always keeps that inside.

They do things with the Pierces for the next two days, even letting them show Santana around the desert and stuff before their red eye flight on Monday night, but by the time they get to the airport, Santana is exhausted and she can tell Brittany was too. They gets on the plane and Brittany rests her head against the window, though Santana really wishes it could be her shoulder. She taps a little on Brittany’s leggings clad thigh and Brittany smiles at her.

“Thank you for coming with me, I know that was hard for you.”

“I just want to know every part of you, Britt. You’ve met my horrible family, it was time I met your parents.”

“I didn’t expect them to be so judgmental of you.”

“They were perfectly nice to me. I mean, they didn’t hate me because I’m a woman. I just happen to be a banker which isn’t exactly their dream for you.”

“Please, my sister wants to go to law school, they’ll get over it.”

“That’s going to go over well.” Santana laughs.

“That’s what I’m saying. I think they actually really liked you though.”

“I was so awkward around them.”

“It was cute. I like that you’re like...just adorable. Especially because it’s only really when it comes to me. It makes me feel special.”

“All my bitch powers melt away.”

“Obviously they’re neutralized by me and my awesome skills. Do you want to switch for the window? You have work earlier than me tomorrow...”

“No I’m good. I’ll just be an ultra bitch when I get there, remind them that I’m not weak even after my surgery knocked me out for weeks.”

“Your stomach feels okay after this, right? I don’t want the stress giving you an ulcer.”

“My stomach’s good. I’m just going to close my eyes now...”

They sleep for the whole flight back to New York and Santana knows that she looks absolutely wrecked when she wakes up. Somehow, Brittany is glowing and chipper but they’re got even out of the airport before Santana orders the largest cup of coffee she can get and immensely regrets the fact that she has to go to work. But she has no choice and when they get out of the cab at the house she goes upstairs to shower off the flight and get dressed and ready as quickly as possible.

Throughout the day, she just wishes she was home, realizing how much she’d missed having her own space, but she works on the accounts on her desk and she paces the floors to check on everything, heels clicking against tile to remind everyone that she’s there and she’s in charge. Hudson, Ben Israel and Schuester have been surprisingly well behaved since she’s returned from her surgery but she doesn’t dare speak it out loud lest the next day she finds Schuester flirting with Terri again and the other two harassing Hummel. All she wants to do is prove that she runs a tight ship and tired as she is, the day runs so smoothly that she actually feels like she does.

When the bank is finally closed, Santana doesn’t stick around late. She gets a cab and has them drop her off at the Thai place around the corner from the house so she can pick up food and have it on the table when Brittany comes home. Once she’s done plating it, she sits down for a minute, just letting her eyes drift close and she doesn’t realize that she’s fallen asleep in a kitchen chair until the sound of the front door jolts her awake.

“Babe, you home?” Brittany calls out.

“In the kitchen! I have dinner.”

“Thank you, moon goddess.” She walks in and sinks down across from Santana, but not before kissing her lips. “I’m hungry and I’m starving and remind me that I never want to take a red eye again.”

“Today was rough. This week is going to be rough.”

“How about we spend the whole weekend in our pajamas?” Brittany suggests and Santana knows she doesn’t suggest naked because they still haven’t been intimate since her surgery.

“That sounds really good. I might have to—“

“Work in your office?”

“Just a little, I promise. But will it make you feel better if I do it in my pajamas?”

“If you let me pick out the movies we’re going to watch.”

“I think I can make that compromise. Britt?”

“Uh huh.”

“As tired as I feel, it was worth it going to Arizona.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, absolutely.”

They eat dinner quietly and Santana cleans up after they’re done. She knows she should get an early start in the morning so she goes into her bathroom and washes up and brushes her teeth before changing into her pajamas. Brittany is sitting on the edge of the bed when she comes out of the bathroom and Santana smiles a little seeing her there. It still feels strange to her that there’s this constant person who loves her and she steps in between her legs, resting her hands on her shoulders and kissing her lips.

“You taste minty and delicious.” Brittany grins, wiping a bit of toothpaste from the corner of Santana’s mouth. “And I’m glad you feel comfortable kissing me in the bedroom again.”

“It made me nervous that your parents were going to walk in...”

“I know. I totally get it. But I’m still happy to have you like this.”

“You know, it’s been almost a year that we’ve been together.”

“It’s weird that we haven’t been together forever. I mean, like seriously, I can barely even remember I time when I wasn’t with you.”

“It’s been a good year. I know you hate when I spend money on you, but I really want to take you to a nice dinner and buy you something for our anniversary.”

“I can’t really trust you, you bought me a Cartier bracelet when we were together for like three months.”

“Brittany, you give me so much emotionally that I don’t know how to do. I was such a wreck meeting your family that I thought I was going to throw up and you just do things like that so casually. Giving you things is what I know how to do. I want you to have the big romantic thing, even though I can’t be public about my love for you. I want to get a private little table in the back of a restaurant and toast the best day of my life. I want to buy you something that reminds you even when I’m a disaster I still love you more than anything. I want to come home and make love to you, however you want it, even if it involves some kind of toy.”

“You really hate the toys, don’t you?” Brittany smiles at her.

“I don’t hate the toys.” Santana shakes her head. “That last Saturday you worked, I was really stressed about work and took a break from my office to...try out your magic wand on my own.”

“How do you think you can tell me basically the hottest thing I’ve ever heard without me wanting to ravish you?”

“It’s late and we’ve been up for a long time.”

“So unfair. Did you think about me while you—“

“There’s no one else I would have thought of.” Santana blushes a little. “I get why you like it, but I like being with you more.”

“Oh, please. It doesn’t even compare to you, it’s just a total boredom killer when you’re at work and I wish I could be going down on you but meanwhile I’m stuck here alone.”

“I can’t even believe I’m having this conversation.”

“You’ve opened up a lot since I’ve met you.”

“The me who met you never would have even considered that...let alone some of the things we’ve done together.” Santana shakes her head.

“It’s different when there’s feelings. You want to try new things.”

“You, Brittany Pierce, have opened up a whole new world to me.”

#brittana #80s au

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