#i very rarely draw anything inspired by mythologi and nature

[arom-antix]

A mood-sketch-line-colour swap (as I’ve elected to call it) I did with @laugaheim

[riizebabie444]

your future spouse’s love language

hi! i'm pearl and i’m so happy you chose this reading ♡ today’s reading is all about the love language of your future spouse and how they express it. this is my first pac on this blog so I hope you enjoy!

♡ disclaimer ♡ please remember that all tarot readings posted on this blog are for fun and entertainment; you should not refer to these readings as a replacement for advice or guidance on serious matters.

reblogs are appreciated, as is feedback! find more pac’s in my masterlist! check out my paid readings and exchange readings! and donations are greatly appreciated ♡

© lueurais — please do not copy, steal or repost anywhere.

♥︎ pile 1 ♥︎

♡ love language ♡

quality time + acts of service

♡ how they express love ♡

i immediately see that this person is not a touchy–feely type; they don’t particularly enjoy or feel comfortable with physical touch, especially the type you might expect in a relationship. so, physical touch is definitely on the bottom of the list of their love languages. however, they do like holding your hand and burying their face in your body. and it is clear to me that quality time is very important to them.

this person loves deep conversations; i’m hearing, in particular, the half–full/half–empty debate. i believe it is of importance to them and may be a deciding factor in whether or not they want to pursue you. they seem like the type of person who would use this debate or others like it to judge other people. but regardless, i think they are genuinely a philosophical person; they love talking with you, getting to the roots of your brain and heart, finding out how you feel and why you feel those things so they can know you better.

i think they’re quite a sensitive person; i have reason to believe that for some of you reading this, your future spouse may have grown up with separated or divorced parents, or a broken family in general. this reflects a lot in how they allow themselves to love. they don’t like touch or pda because they very rarely saw it with their own parents. they also may have not received a lot of attention as a child, and this is why quality time is important to them.

i’m seeing art very prominently, so either them or you could be artists. i said quality time and i definitely think expressing yourselves together creatively would be fun to do. maybe art dates, or walks in nature and under the stars to gain inspiration for art. and other activities like pottery class or bouquet making, they might take you to a wreath making class do you can make one together for your home in the holidays; if there's anything fun and creative to do, they want to do it with you.

they have a rough edge that is hard to crack through. but they are driven and if they are serious about you, they will put in the effort. i’m seeing acts of service, like always paying for meals and bringing/making you coffee and driving you to where you need to go. it would also be hard to read their facial expressions, but they are soft for you on the inside and you will know this because of all the little things they do for you.

♡ symbols and signs ♡

clouds, paint/drawing/art, crying, the letter s, a white horse or other white animals (such as a dog or cat), heterochromia, gemini, 5, tree, stars, 32, mythology, leo/5th house, opiuchus, dark brown hair, roses, water signs.

♡ cards ♡

the artist, knight of swords, the lovers rv, five of cups rv

♥︎ pile 2 ♥︎

♡ love language ♡

acts of service, gift giving + quality time

♡ how they express love ♡

from them, i am getting the image of an angel who gives. they are a generous person; they like giving to support you. whether it is extravagant gifts or simply helping you in giving you what you need to get by. i see both ends of the spectrum — for some of you, they will be able to give you expensive and fancy things, and for some of you, they will not be as disposable with their income but will still give to you because they care about you.

gold is popping out a lot, so maybe gold jewellery or other gold gifts, or maybe they like gold wrapping paper. and it is not subjective – it can be anything deemed precious, like gold. but i also see they are quite moderate, so they prefer to give gifts with deep thought and meanings to them rather than going straight for the most expensive and fancy looking item in the store.

i see this person with a lot of fears and anxieties in regards to the relationship they have with you, and they may also worry you feel the same way. and it’s normal to have these feelings at some point in a relationship. so, i think they’d be urged to give more gifts when they have those worries. they want to appeal to you with generosity which could turn into an unhealthy habit, so keep an eye out for those who this resonates with.

bringing you water on a hot day — this image feels really clear. maybe those of you reading this live in a hot country, or really like hot weather. i see the sun bright in the sky and they’re worried you may be dehydrated or suffering from heatstroke, so they will always make sure you are drinking enough water, especially during hot weather.

and carrying on with the topic of sun, there’s a scene where the sun is touching the horizon. perhaps you guys went to watch the sun set after a date. gold rays are coming in strongly, so it might be your guys’ thing – watching the sun set or rise and leaving the curtains open in your home so the rooms can fill with warm, bright light from the sun. consistency is important to them, so little routines like these that you both enjoy makes them feel so special and they love being reminded that you are there to experience these moments with them.

♡ symbols and signs ♡

sagittarius, water signs, flowing water, nightmares, sun, jupiter, marigolds, sunset and/or sunrise, 10, wings, studio ghibli, unhealthy habits, summer, 444

♡ cards ♡

temperance, nine of swords, knight of cups, seven of wands.

♥︎ pile 3 ♥︎

♡ love language ♡

physical touch, quality time + words of affirmation

♡ how they express love ♡

with two kings here, i definitely see they are very vocal and confident with their words. they seem like the person who always speaks their mind, whether they are expressing happy thoughts or bad ones. that also means they will make it clear when they are upset or angry, but it also means they will clear any doubts you have and make sure you know that they love you.

although, for some of you, i see that your future spouse could be the type who falls silent when they are angry, but even in this case, they will eventually tell you what the issue is and make it clear that their feelings for you don’t change so easily.

in particular, i hear “you’re the best!” and grabbing your head and kissing you on the forehead. “i’m so lucky,” “i couldn’t have figured this out without you,” and “you look great in that outfit,” are what i’m also hearing. i think for some of you, your future spouse will be the type of person who has a catchphrase, like “i’m impressed,” or something along those lines. this is just what i heard, but it could be anything, and they will tend to use it to boost your confidence, and also when they are trying to flirt with you.

they obviously love to spend time with you, but i think they will particularly love holidays with you. i’m seeing quiet villas in countries along the equator, maybe that resonates with some of you. for others, i see the coast. peaceful getaways are like a goldmine to them; they may not happen a lot but when they do, they have the best times of their lives with you.

and holding hands is so prominent. just hands in general. even if you’re holding something else in your hand, they will take it and replace it with their own hand. physical touch like cuddling and kissing would take place, but for them, touching you with their hands is what fulfils them. it’s the fact that you are real and touchable so they always need that reality check to ensure you’re really there. and if you like all the touching, then they will do it tenfold. holding hands, or their hands roaming all over your body; whatever it is, they will almost always have their hands on you.

♡ symbols and signs ♡

323, twice (kpop girl group), coasts, nice hands, black birds, italy, blue skies, 11, magpies, graduation, purple gown, olives, pastel colours, chameleon, green, greece

♡ cards ♡

ace of swords, two of wands, king of wands, king of swords

[ponkho]

Dimitry Darrleeyia

The cold, serious and cryptid magician whos past is in flames

Introduction

Full name: Dimitry Keahi Darrleeyia

Meaning: Dimitry means "Earth-lover" and "Devoted/Dedicated to demeter" (greek mythology goddess of corn and harvest). Keahi is a boy's name of Hawaiian origin meaning "flames" . Darrleeyia does not have any meaning, it is there for backstory purposes.

Source 1 source 2

Pronunciation: Dimitry (Dim-mi-tri) Keahi (ke-ah-hí) Darrleeyia (Darr-lee-ih-ah)

Gender: Male, He-Him

Birthday: 15/9

Age: 28

Orientation: Pansexual

Magic: fire, Earth (rocks creation and manipulation)

Occupation: Magician, shop-keeper, fortune teller,

Familiar: Maxwell, the red panda. Cute boy, horrible personality

Love interest: Asra

Shippable? Yes! Absolutely!!

Theme song: Phoenix - Fall out Boy

playlist :)

Zodiac Sign: Virgo

MBTI: ISTJ

Major Arcana: The Moon

Upright: Unconscious, illusions intuition

Reversed: confusion, fear, misinterpretation

Minor Arcana: Ace of Swords

Upright: breakthrough, clarity, sharp mind

Reversed: confusion, brutality, chaos

— Magic —

Fire–- his habilities in general is around fire magic, such as creating a flame from thin air to creating massive explosions. If you manage to enrage him enough his hair will turn into flames and he will breath a black hot smoke.

Earth–- this magic is more on the rock solid part. He's not very good with nature and earth magic (since he tends to burn things down thanks to his fire magic) but he is actually pretty good at rock manipulation. He can creates hard rocks from the ground and create precious rocks even, his most precious rock he can create is diamonds, but for that he needs to have passed through a hard time of stress, sadness or any overwhelming bad feeling, and as a result, two horns made of diamonds will grow to defend himself and look threatening. (He feels embarrassed after, he thinks he was weak enough to let those feelings overwhelm him)

Others habilities: he can speak with animals, cooks amazingly good and he's good at only three weapons: daggers, katanas and Lances.

— Personality and Preferences —

Personality: he's cold, cryptid and too honest. He doesn't give a single shit about how you feel, most of the time, i mean. He is hard to befriend, and always is looking for some hidden lie under any word that comes out of your mouth, but once you get his trust he will still be very cold but he will start showing how he feels. Like, giving gifts, making things. Giving without wanting back.

He has a great talent of getting through lies, so if you really want to deceive him, you gotta be smarter than him. People tend to stay away from his path everywhere he goes, not because bad reputation, but for respect, he can look as calm and cool as he wants but he can and will put you to your place if needed. Dimitry, whenever he wants to impress, he'll act, doesn't know how to talk about feelings or anything, so if he know about something you really want or like he'll get it for you, but will never want to take credits for it, instead he will use the famous "I just happened to be there".

Finally when he really likes someone, his behavior changes totally towards this person. He's calm, loving, sweet, measure his words with care to not hurt, loyal and becomes a little bit protective. He will smile more and if you're lucky, you can even get some chuckles out of his mouth, he'll even create jewels for you, "oh you like knives? Here's a diamond dagger I made."

Never talks about his markings. Unless you have a amazing relationship with him, but even so, he will only give hints and never the whole truth.

Likes: Cooking, talking with Max(well), reading, drawing, playing harp,(He plays it at his bedroom on the palace) silence.

Dislikes: loud people, disrespect, lies.

Fears: losing Max, cages and betrayal

Quirks: he can run extremely fast and thanks to his tail, he can make swift turns without losing much speed. His markings burn when he is enraged, and sometimes they will burn his own clothes.

Favorite food: Gingerbread

Favorite Drink: Hot chocolate

Favorite flower: Gardenia

Favorite color: Mahogany

Most likely to: burn a city down because they messed with one of his friends

★— Appearance — ★

Height: 197 cm

Eyes: Burning orange transitioning to yellow

Hair: long Mahogany colored hair, two long bangs on the front, hair tied up on a bun.

Other: his hair is not originally mahogany, his hair color is the same as the tuff of fur on his tail, wich is, blonde.

Color theme: Mahogany, red, yellows and beige.

Family & Background

Family:

His current adoptive mother is a queen, or as they say, a Leader, wich would make him the next in line

Bianca Wood - biological mother - deceased // Relationship: none

Darek Wood - biological father - alive? // Relationship: Bad

Meghan Rook - adoptive mother - deceased // Relationship: bad

Andrew Rook - adoptive father - deceased // Relationship: horrible

Lys Rook - adoptive sister - deceased // Relationship: he was kind of her slave

???? Darrleeyia - Adoptive mother - alive // Relationship: motherly, friend, family

History

Sit down because it's going to be a long talk

He was born on a very poor little village and his parents never actually wanted kids, it's one more mouth to feed and they almost didn't have food for themselves, he was raised to work hard, he helped on home already at a age when he knew already what was happening around him. His mother never gave him a motherly love and his dad just talked to him to offend or to order him around, not that he cared about it, he thought it was how parents worked. One day his mother fell ill and died, at that age Dimitry was 6, he knew she wasn't coming back and his dad started to put the blame on him for her death, as if he could do anything. One day things got out of hand and his dad became alcoholic, then he started to owe money for people, and he couldn't pay it. So one day, when the opportunity came and he saw that Dimitry could use magic, he sold Dimitry to a couple that needed someone to cook, clean and entertain the guests of their bar on another village. They payed a good price and even more because of the magic Dimitry knew.

When he arrived he felt betrayed, left by his own father. So he thought "Well, he was an ass anyways. I'm sure I'll be better here" unfortunately, it was not what happened. They had already pointed out that they needed someone to cook and clean the bar, wich he already knew and was fine with it but then they started to abuse their power over him. His sister made him clean her bedroom, she would cut his hair just for "fun" and blame him for anything she had done, and of course her parents believed her and only her. He got spanked a lot of times and then he just decided he would never smile or talk again, because every word that comes out of his mouth turns against him, at this time he was 8.

One day a customer, different from all the others came directly at him. It was a woman, taller than everyone in that room, she used a hood and she had an air of superiority. She asked him why he was sad and why did he work so hard, he didn't answer, but she insisted on talking to him, she even invited him to sit on a table to talk with her but he refused since he was working. Then, she told him she had a way of saving him from that place, he was just like her, but because of always restraining his emotions and desires, he didn't look different from all the rest. She would come at night again to have one last talk and it was his choice if he wanted to go or not.

When the woman came back at night, she was without her hood and when she walked in, all the bar fell silent. He finally knew who that woman was. She was the woman from the tales, the legends, she was Darrleeyia, a goddess. She brings warmth, prosperity and happiness whenever she goes, and she was just there, on that miserable bar, just to ask him if he wanted to come home. After she made the question all the eyes fell on Dimitry, he felt anxious for the first time, but he knew she wouldn't be worse than what already was happening to him there, so he accepted her offer. She gave him her hand and they walked out of the bar without interruptions. What about the bar, you say? She burnt it down and she did not hide her satisfaction of it.

Together, they went got on a ship and she took Dimitry where he now can call home.

Five Facts:

Dimitry is allergic to shrimp. He discovered that when the Leader of the seas of the homeland gave him a shrimp as a treat for helping her out. The Leader got in trouble with Darrleeyia later on.

He is ambidextrous

He can purr, but it's rare. Extremely rare that only two people saw him do that. His mother and Maxwell

His body runs at a higher temperature than normal humans.

His diamond horns cannot be broken by anyone other than himself. If someone wants to take it out they'll have to crack Dimitry's skull.

Art References:

I got 99% inspired by @juliandev0rak's Cadmus bio soooo

[tlbodine]

The Wendigo is Not What You Think

There’s been a recent flurry of discussion surrounding the Wendigo -- what it is, how it appears in fiction, and whether non-Native creators should even be using it in their stories. This post is dedicated to @halfbloodlycan​, who brought the discourse to my attention. 

Once you begin teasing apart the modern depictions of this controversial monster, an interesting pattern emerges -- namely, that what pop culture generally thinks of as the “wendigo” is a figure and aesthetic that has almost nothing in common with its Native American roots...but a whole lot in common with European Folklore. 

What Is A Wendigo? 

The Algonquian Peoples, a cluster of tribes indigenous to the region of the Great Lakes and Eastern Seaboard of Canada and the northern U.S., are the origin of Wendigo mythology. For them, the Wendigo (also "windigo" or "Witigo" and similar variations) is a malevolent spirit. It is connected to winter by way of cold, desolation, and selfishness. It is a spirit of destruction and environmental decay. It is pure evil, and the kind of thing that people in the culture don't like to talk about openly for fear of inviting its attention.

Individual people can turn into the Wendigo (or be possessed by one, depending on the flavor of the story), sometimes through dreams or curses but most commonly through engaging in cannibalism. Considering the long, harsh winters in the region, it makes sense that the cultural mythology would address the cannibalism taboo.

For some, the possession of the Wendigo spirit is a very real thing, not just a story told around the campfire. So-called "wendigo psychosis" has been described as a "culture-bound" mental illness where an individual is overcome with a desire to eat people and the certainty that he or she has been possessed by a Wendigo or is turning into a Wendigo. Obviously, it was white people encountering the phenomenon who thought to call it "psychosis," and there's some debate surrounding the whole concept from a psychological, historical, and anthropological standpoint which I won't get into here -- but the important point here is that the Algonquian people take this very seriously. (1) (2)

(If you're interested in this angle, you might want to read about the history of Zhauwuno-geezhigo-gaubow (or Jack Fiddler), a shaman who was known as something of a Wendigo hunter. I'd also recommend the novel Bone White by Ronald Malfi as a pretty good example of how these themes can be explored without being too culturally appropriative or disrespectful.) 

Wendigo Depictions in Pop Culture

Show of hands: How many of you reading this right now first heard of the Wendigo in the Alvin Schwartz Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark book?

That certainly was my first encounter with the tale. It was one of my favorite stories in the book as a little kid. It tells about a rich man who goes hunting deep in the wilderness, where people rarely go. He finds a guide who desperately needs the money and agrees to go, but the guide is nervous throughout the night as the wind howls outside until he at last bursts outside and takes off running. His tracks can be found in the snow, farther and farther apart as though running at great speed before abruptly ending. The idea being that he was being dragged along by a wind-borne spirit that eventually picked him up and swept him away.

Schwartz references the story as a summer camp tale well-known in the Northeastern U.S., collected from a professor who heard it in the 1930s. He also credits Algernon Blackwood with writing a literary treatment of the tale -- and indeed, Blackwood's 1910 novella "The Wendigo" has been highly influential in the modern concept of the story.(3)  His Wendigo would even go on to find a place in Cthulhu Mythos thanks to August Derleth.

Never mind, of course, that no part of Blackwood's story has anything in common with the traditional Wendigo myth. It seems pretty obvious to me that he likely heard reference of a Northern monster called a "windigo," made a mental association with "wind," and came up with the monster for his story.

And so would begin a long history of white people re-imagining the sacred (and deeply frightening) folklore of Native people into...well, something else.

Through the intervening decades, adaptations show up in multiple places. Stephen King's Pet Sematary uses it as a possible explanation for the dark magic of the cemetery's resurrectionist powers. A yeti-like version appears as a monster in Marvel Comics to serve as a villain against the Hulk. Versions show up in popular TV shows like Supernatural and Hannibal. There's even, inexplicably, a Christmas episode of Duck Tales featuring a watered-down Wendigo.

Where Did The Antlered Zombie-Deer-Man Come From? 

In its native mythology, the Wendigo is sometimes described as a giant with a heart of ice. It is sometimes skeletal and emaciated, and sometimes deformed. It may be missing its lips and toes (like frostbite). (4)

So why, when most contemporary (white) people think of Wendigo, is the first image that comes to mind something like this?

Well...perhaps we can thank a filmmaker named Larry Fessenden, who appears to be the first person to popularize an antlered Wendigo monster. (5) His 2001 film (titled, creatively enough, Wendigo) very briefly features a sort of skeletal deer-monster. He’d re-visit the design concept in his 2006 film, The Last Winter. Reportedly, Fessenden was inspired by a story he’d heard in his childhood involving deer-monsters in the frozen north, which he connected in his mind to the Algernon Blackwood story. 

A very similar design would show up in the tabletop game Pathfinder, where the “zombie deer-man” aesthetic was fully developed and would go on to spawn all sorts of fan-art and imitation. (6) The Pathfinder variant does draw on actual Wendigo mythology -- tying it back to themes of privation, greed, and cannibalism -- but the design itself is completely removed from Native folklore. 

Interestingly, there are creatures in Native folklore that take the shape of deer-people -- the  ijiraq or tariaksuq, shape-shifting spirits that sometimes take on the shape of caribou and sometimes appear in Inuit art in the form of man-caribou hybrids (7). Frustratingly, the ijiraq are also part of Pathfinder, which can make it a bit hard to find authentic representations vs pop culture reimaginings. But it’s very possible that someone hearing vague stories of northern Native American tribes encountering evil deer-spirits could get attached to the Wendigo, despite the tribes in question being culturally distinct and living on opposite sides of the continent. 

That “wendigo” is such an easy word to say in English probably has a whole lot to do with why it gets appropriated so much, and why so many unrelated things get smashed in with it. 

I Love the Aesthetic But Don’t Want to Be Disrespectful, What Do I Do? 

Plundering folklore for creature design is a tried-and-true part of how art develops, and mythology has been re-interpreted and adapted countless times into new stories -- that’s how the whole mythology thing works. 

But when it comes to Native American mythology, it’s a good idea to apply a light touch. As I’ve talked about before, Native representation in modern media is severely lacking. Modern Native people are the survivors of centuries of literal and cultural genocide, and a good chunk of their heritage, language, and stories have been lost to history because white people forcibly indoctrinated Native children into assimilating. So when those stories get taken, poorly adapted, and sent back out into the public consciousness as make-believe movie monsters, it really is an act of erasure and violence, no matter the intentions of the person doing it. (8) 

So, like...maybe don’t do that? 

I won’t say that non-Native people can’t be interested in Wendigo stories or tell stories inspired by the myth. But if you’re going to do it, either do it respectfully and with a great deal of research to get it accurate...or use the inspiration to tell a different type of story that doesn’t directly appropriate or over-write the mythology (see above: my recommendation for Bone White). 

But if your real interest is in the “wendigocore” aesthetic -- an ancient and powerful forest protector, malevolent but fiercely protective of nature, imagery of deer and death and decay -- I have some good news: None of those things are really tied uniquely to Native American mythology, nor do they have anything in common with the real Wendigo. 

Where they do have a longstanding mythic framework? Europe.

Europeans have had a long-standing fascination with deer, goats, and horned/antlered forest figures. Mythology of white stags and wild hunts, deer as fairy cattle, Pan, Baphomet, Cernunnos, Herne the Hunter, Black Phillip and depictions of Satan -- the imagery shows up again and again throughout Greek, Roman, and British myth. (9)

Of course, some of these images and figures are themselves the product of cultural appropriation, ancient religions and deities stolen, plundered, demonized and erased by Christian influences. But their collective existence has been a part of “white” culture for centuries, and is probably a big part of the reason why the idea of a mysterious antlered forest-god has stuck so swiftly and firmly in our minds, going so far as to latch on to a very different myth. (Something similar has happened to modern Jersey Devil design interpretations. Deer skulls with their tangle of magnificent antlers are just too striking of a visual to resist). 

Seriously. There are so, so many deer-related myths throughout the world’s history -- if aesthetic is what you’re after, why limit yourself to an (inaccurate) Wendigo interpretation? (10) 

So here’s my action plan for you, fellow white person: 

Stop referring to anything with antlers as a Wendigo, especially when it’s very clearly meant to be its own thing (the Beast in Over the Garden Wall, Ainsworth in Magus Bride)

Stop “reimagining” the mythology of people whose culture has already been targeted by a systematic erasure and genocide

Come up with a new, easy-to-say, awesome name for “rotting deer man, spirit of the forest” and develop a mythology for it that doesn’t center on cannibalism 

We can handle that, right? 

This deep dive is supported by Ko-Fi donations. If you’d like to see more content, please drop a tip in my tip jar.  Ko-fi.com/A57355UN

NOTES: 

1 - https://io9.gizmodo.com/wendigo-psychosis-the-probably-fake-disease-that-turns-5946814

2 - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wendigo#Wendigo_psychosis

3 - https://www.gutenberg.org/files/10897/10897-h/10897-h.htm

4 - https://www.legendsofamerica.com/mn-wendigo/

5- https://www.reddit.com/r/Cryptozoology/comments/8wu2nq/wendigo_brief_history_of_the_modern_antlers_and/

6 - https://pathfinderwiki.com/wiki/Wendigo

7 - https://www.mythicalcreaturescatalogue.com/single-post/2017/12/06/Ijiraq

8 - https://www.backstoryradio.org/blog/the-mythology-and-misrepresentation-of-the-windigo/

9 - https://www.terriwindling.com/blog/2014/12/the-folklore-of-goats.html

10 - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deer_in_mythology

[occasionally-sketchy]

FINALLY, THE FRUITS OF MY DESCENT INTO MADNESS!

Seriously though, after finishing the first season of @jelloapocalypse‘s “Epithet Erased” series, I had to make something to celebrate! Here, I finished pics of my Epithet Erased persona/self-insert, Callie!! I had a blast designing and developing her, I hope you all like this!

More information on her under the cut!

Calliope ��Callie” Reverie is a very shy and anxious, but warm and intuitive art student who loves drawing and writing, even more so that her Epithet allows her to LITERALLY bring her ideas to life! She often summons her art subjects and story characters to consult them on the direction of their respective projects, or to act out a scene/art idea she’s stuck on, as well to keep her company... Callie rarely leaves her college dorm, but she can be found sitting in a local park or cafe, scribbling her surroundings and occasionally summoning small ideas to seek creative advice from. She’s generally hard to interact with, given she seems to be more focused on her ideas than the real world, but she opens up as a friendly and witty acquaintance once someone shows interest in what goes on in her head.

The limitations of Callie’s powers start with her two hands. For one thing, her drawings have to be complete, and that typically means finished and in a medium/style that she’s familiar with. For example, her powers wouldn’t work as well if she was trying something out of her usual drawing comfort zone, such as chalk or painting. Her most reliable and effective drawing medium is pen or pencils with her sketchbook, which she brings wherever she goes. In addition, her drawings can only be brought to life if they’re drawn on a recognizable drawing surface, such as paper. Anything else, like concrete or tabletop surfaces, is hit-or-miss. Finally, and most importantly, the more fantastical the creations she chooses to conjure are, the more energy is drained from her. This leads her to limit her more wild ideas to certain occasions, especially in a last-ditch effort in combat.

Callie normally avoids conflict of any kind at ANY cost, but her main powers in battle, besides conjuring any real-world object and (almost) any ideas of her imagination, are:

Drawing a Weapon: Callie draws a weapon in her sketchbook and can pull it out to use in combat. The catch is it has to be a weapon that is or has existed in the real world (so no laser beams, magic artifacts are hit-or-miss if not rare) AND it has to be a weapon she can know how to wield. She’s best at baseball bats or pellet guns, but not so much with battleaxes or cannons.

Divine Inspiration: Callie bestows an ally an “inspiration”, or power-up, to their abilities (effectively temporarily giving them a bonus Creative Point). Given the fantastical nature of Epithets, this attack can be particularly draining for Callie the more she uses it, so she would use it sparingly.

Artist’s Block: Callie creates a prismatic shield to protect people or things of her choosing. She has to stay focused on it for it to remain, however.

Epic Apotheosis: This is her ultimate, often “eleventh-hour”, ability. Here, she conjures an army made up of her OCs pure imagination to assail her target. The nature of this attack causes her to pass out immediately after it is stopped/completed and be rendered completely inactive for the duration of the battle (or until someone shoves a Stamina-restoring snack in her face).

Fun Facts

Her design is inspired by the phrase “head in the clouds” because. She daydreams. A lot. Heh.

Her Epithet and her subsequent magical markings (her cloud-rainbow hair and cloud pupils) emerged when she was 12-13 years old in middle school.

Has a BIG interest in Greek/Roman mythology, and so mostly conjures creatures and figures from such figures for fun/combat.

[atrayo]

Jewels of Truth Statements and Favorite Quotes of the Month of November

Hello All,

I hope those of you in the States had a safe and pleasant Thanksgiving Holiday. I haven't posted so much due to some holiday blues. This is the 1st holiday season I'm spending alone. Otherwise, my mother which I'm a caregiver from a distance for the past 9 months. She will be shortly transferred to a long-term skilled nursing facility (SNF) versus her current memory care assisted living facility. (ALF). Due to her deteriorating health conditions overall, thus the holiday blues in part.

Aside from this human drama, I'm still channeling the angels just not as frequently as before. It's always been in cycles of periods of heavy-duty inspirational automatic writing and then periods I enter the doldrums over these 25+ years. Perhaps it's their way to keep me frosty without burning me out throughout the year.

Today's trio of angelic channeled "Jewels of Truth" statements are on the topics of Worship, Humanity Creates God Fulfills, and Divination & Magicks. I've always have channeled as a universal all-inclusive compassionate faith perspective. As if God has no favorite form of spiritual tradition or religion since it is all him in various flavors. Thus I can easily touch briefly on a statement that has Christianity, Hinduism, and Paganism all in one like a melting pot of the glorified heavens eternal.

May you find today's statements intriguing even though they may challenge you spiritually. Which is a good thing for it expands your inventory of possibilities of the Great Mystery of God in earnest. Amen.

Worship:

2989) To the heart that believes and dares to know in impossible realities through God(dess). You shall never be truly alone in the starry heavens of your galaxy and beyond into your cosmos. You are an intrepid knower on the soul level of what is miraculous is very much real to the divine essence of the Creator.

Theology or not, dogma and rhetoric can not withstand the pure heart of an earnest worshipper of the Constant Soul of God(dess). To draw conclusions that sit beyond the safe parameters of the known. No matter if clergy can quantify it or not by cultural faiths and norms. Yours is the conviction of things hoped for but rarely acknowledged as seen and much less heard as common or otherwise as to the wider scope of the metaphysical endless realities.

Here stands the giant of audacity and the trivial fool not willing to take a positive stand with realized merit in action and internal poise of character. Only the driven with an Imagined knowing can seize the powerful and the sacrosanct to behold the Mysticism of an Almighty Living God. Amen.  ---Ivan Pozo-Illas / Atrayo.

Humanity Creates, God Fulfills:

2985) To the seeker who realizes many absurd things of his/her own native humanistic reality as skewed. Must acknowledge the differences that exist as a spectrum of potentialities some of which come into unbalanced fruition.

The Divine spiritual and religious traditions globally has been an attempt by humanity to transcend its mundane limitations. Now the Science experiment has replaced the ideations of the gods as angels and/or a Creator spiritually as God in part. It is merely one philosophical doctrine replacing another by evolutionary tendencies that are wholly natural by the arc of the eons of mortal existence.

The Universe is both seeped in the Divine regardless of Xyz of a particular faith tradition. It is also godless without spirituality as each entity as a childlike creation of a cryptic Maker has the liberty to choose within this Great Mystery. To this effect, the point of origin of existence is a paradox of godly/angelic design. It is subjective and objective simultaneously of your very mundane human finite lifetimes.

Each of you are vehicles as projections of the Infinite nature of the Universe extraordinarily so. This Universe is God-centric and it is not. The Universe of immense populated souls times infinite comprehension is just another stratum of higher echelon interpretation of the one Supreme Soul of God(dess). This Universe physical or otherwise metaphysical is just another incarnation of a spirit entity as a child of God. Much like your planet of the earth is Mother Earth as a spiritual sister to the singular Soul of God(dess). Which all life shares as its own rightful incarnation at a greater scale of life is Mother Earth and Father Sky than one mortal lifetime as people are predisposed as lifeforms to date. The Universe is only a subset of the Created children of a Majestic Deity which includes the astral multi-verse of the afterlife. (ie the heavens, limbos, and despicable hells)

Every philosophy dependent on like-kind is an expression trying to grapple with the meaning and function of existence at large. Humanity upon antiquity and before recorded history has always aimed its divinity to the stars of the cosmos. This is aside from the animism of the spiritual glory of the gods as angels found upon the myriad creatures of this earth. With limitless abandon of the afterlife has humanity with Imagination projected its Will of Mankind outwards.

In so far of this projection of the human condition wrapped around the enigma of the divine auspices of the soul of Life itself. Humanity created in its own flawed Image and Likeness to this very era. Be it philosophies as religions, spiritual traditions, the branches of the sciences, and so forth. It is natural and a noble enterprise for any semi-sentient species to attempt in order to embark on realizing its very limitless nature of God in them collectively.

Humanity upon antiquity created Pantheons of lesser deities not unlike the traditions of the human saints as patrons. Where every patron under the proverbial sky is a governor of a certain aspect of your reality in earnest. Be it of the human condition and/or of meteorological wonders and other meta forms of existence as its very misunderstood conundrums. Some succeed in piercing the veils of the astral metaverse of the spiritual continuum of what you term as the supernatural afterlife.

Meaning the afterlife is the angelic playground of the gods and goddesses as the lesser deities of all combined macro-mythologies across all realities simultaneously extraordinaire. Some worshippers of the angels (ie lesser deities) of now mostly dead religions as schools of thought that later became philosophical doctrines of various orders of a similar kind. Whereas the instance of the School of Diana (Artemis) as the ancient Greco-roman goddess. Is an angelic presence of the heavenly Olympus as the astral Kingdom of God in a metaverse all of its own divine nature.

You see where the children of God worship anything whatsoever as real or unreal all that raw spiritual power dynamo of the Soul of God for centuries has to go somewhere. Thus it becomes enchanted by magical or otherwise divine means under the Will of God mysterious as it stands. All myths and Legends are treated as reality upon the spiritual afterlife regardless if it was real or not on Earth and beyond. Anything that a semi-sentient species like humanity upon the cosmos worship through the Meta-Supreme Almighty Soul of God(dess). Becomes christened as a divine keepsake eternal entity given a spirit body as a zeitgeist of its era or society of its subsequent civilization(s) that birthed it philosophically.

Moreover, anything with sufficient reverence as adorations by humanity en masse. Becomes deified by the Will of God(dess) as the Great Mystery Loves to Create Wonders through its Children Forever as Divine Immaculate Law. A perpetual grandiose cause and effect conundrum on a scale that dwarfs comprehension. Of our combined spiritual understandings as mortals having a finite existence as people much less realized as eternal souls.

This is truly a thing of beauty as an unintended consequence of spirituality with timeless repercussions. God enchants through all of its/his/her Infinite Children as spiritual bodies in motion in any reality whatsoever that it is pleased. Humanity is no exception to this rule of cosmic divinity. So the angelic goddess entity of "Artemis/Diana" is man-made fictitious lore of a now-dead religious theological Hellenistic period of humanity. Albeit paradoxically she was born with her twin brother Helios/Apollo god of an angel by the metaphysics explained above. She isn't immortal stalking the earth as the huntress. She is a christened angel a lesser deity as a spirit body created by humanity's ancient greek soulful devotions worshipped spiritually speaking. Over two thousand years plus of worship and a spirit is born upon the astral realms of humanity.

It doesn't end there...Every Spirit Body given life as an angel as holy and unholy that was/is/will be worshipped by humanity across the centuries well into the eons. Is adopted by a like-kind Oversoul real angelic deity of a higher divine reality or echelon of spiritual significance with equal or near-equal similar attributes. So an Oversoul angelic meta-presence wears the humanity created spirit entity like a mask or costume akin to cosplay on a cosmic scale of the afterlife. So the spirit created by humanity as Artemis worshipped for two eons at least is worn like a mask or costume by a legitimate angel of the Lord God as an intercessor with similar like-kind inferences of divine forms. Living out sincerely its own mythology created by humanity as theological at its own discretion as it is required for eternity.

So when certain humans worship deeply in the astral afterlife an angelic vessel spirit body deity is created. Some religions as priestly classes bend the fabric of metaphysical reality to even create philosophies of High Magicks. To interact with said lesser deities (ie Artemis and Apollo) including systems of divination as Oracle spiritual traditions. Much like Michael Angelos's depiction as a ceiling mural of the Sistine Chapel of Man attempting to touch God finger to finger.

Humanity is a carnal rebirth or echo of the vast litany of angelic spiritual species of various stages of soulful eternal evolution. It is the Constant Will of a Living Creator God(dess) to create, recreate as sustaining, to destroy, and so forth in its Supreme Perfect Angelic Image and Likeness Forever. Amen. ---Ivan Pozo-Illas / Atrayo.

Divination & Magicks:

2984) Every form of simplistic to complicated ritualized and technical form of Divination system on Earth. Has its own corresponding High Magicks associated with it. With numerous expressions of energetic spiritual clearings/purifications of space with evocations and Invocations at large. Besides any other accompanying blessings and healings at least in the framework of the heavenly beneficent realms of grace.

This is to showcase to you "Ivan the Atrayo" what you deemed as an entry-level Intuitive holy gift of God. Is far wider and farther than meets the typical eyes, hearts, and minds of a genuine seeker of the divine. To name any form of divination from Viking Runes or your choice of a type of Astrology (ie Western, Indigenous American (ie Mayan, etc...), Vedic, Chinese, and even Babylonian). All these mentioned and countless more in the dozens from the Tarot to Lenormands to regular playing deck of cards and so forth. These can have a generic or a very specific corresponding School of Magicks associated with it as extensions to forms of Oracle Mysticism.

You see that Caribbean Hoo Doo as the folk magicks of VooDoo as a pagan spiritual tradition. Having its onset from the Haitian African Diaspora due to the Colonial Era slave trade of Europe and of the Americans. Had richly held Nigerian Yoruba influences very strongly set when encountered by the Caucasians religion of Christianity where it syncretized itself. So the Catholic Saints such as Mother Mary Queen of Angels and/or Saint Barbara for instance. Were blended together to make a cross-pollinated thing of beauty to such common folk of the Caribbean.

It is no different how the Ancient Greco religion influenced the Ancient Romans and yet again the Cult of Christianity upon Antiquity became the State Religion of the Romans. There are countless instances historically of other forms of spiritually fueled diviners creating and adopting magical interpretations of the divine given their epoch in time. Everything upon Creation is a constant melting pot of creativity for all perceived endless spiritual realities.

For all mortal kind and the heavenly afterlife with the angels as the lesser deities as corresponding anchors to the magicks in question. The global ancestors borrowed from other cultures they encountered as foreigners across routes of mass commerce and by subjugation through warfare. As the world evolved societies have come and gone as territories have become certain empires influenced the ages spiritually.

It is with this plethora of souls that opportunities present themselves time and again. For systems of divinations and subsequent magickal orders are latched onto the angels and lesser deities. To perform and safeguard our better lives as the practitioner sees fit by either faith or secular whims. The Will of God is all-inclusive for it is only the selfish petty whims of humanity that seek to control and centralize what is otherwise abundant not only on Earth but in the Cosmos.

No matter religion or spiritual persuasion no one is turned away that seeks greater spiritual union with the divine by whichever means makes the most sense to them. Thus the Oracle Spiritual Arts and the Magical Branches as Meta-Sciences as your Divine Inheritance of God(dess) have appeal globally no matter the epoch one is located therein. Amen. ---Ivan Pozo-Illas / Atrayo.

You have power over your mind-not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength. ---Marcus Aurelius.

When you feel yourself breaking down, may you break open instead. May every experience in life be a door that opens your heart, expands your understanding, and leads you to freedom. ---Elizabeth Lesser.

Ride the winds of change, unafraid. ---Larry Ward.

Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see. ---Hebrews 11:1.

My religion is nature. That's what arouses those feelings of wonder and mysticism and gratitude in me. ---Oliver Sacks.

When we are fully alert in spirit, mind, and body, we are more than we imagine and can accomplish more than we suppose. ---Barbara Holmes.

We should appreciate the beauty in the diversity. It would be a boring world, if every flower were the same shape, color, and size. ---Muhammad Ali.

If you want to have a full and happy life, in good times and in bad, you have to get used to the idea that facing misfortune squarely is better than trying to escape from it. ---Norman Fischer.

Ivan "Atrayo" Pozo-Illas, has devoted 25 years of his life to the pursuit of clairvoyant Inspired automatic writing channeling the Angelic host. Ivan is the author of the spiritual wisdom series of "Jewels of Truth" consisting of 3 volumes published to date. He also channels conceptual designs that are multi-faceted for the next society to come that are solutions based as a form of dharmic service. Numerous examples of his work are available at "Atrayo's Oracle" blog site of 15 years plus online. Your welcome to visit his website "Jewelsoftruth.us" for further information or to contact Atrayo directly.  

[narwhallove]

Behind the Curtain: Interview with Romy Writer Ludi-Ling

House of Cards actually started out as a random smut scene that burgeoned into something far, far more.

@ludi-ling goes meta in our final interview about her writing process; how the Romy fandom’s changed over the years; alternate universes (AU); and the role of smut for Romy fans. (Spoiler alert, our heroes are hot.)

No surprise that it’s a pleasure interviewing Ludi. I kept sending her more questions (25 total!) because her responses fascinated me and inspired me to ask more. It’s a rare person who writes visceral, startling prose and can also talk about her work with clarity, intelligence, and an affection for her characters that doesn’t occlude good writerly judgment.

The superlatives don’t end there. Anyone who knows the community knows that Ludi is a friend to her readers and to her fellow writers. As we all enter a heady 2019, reading Mr. and Mrs. X together, Ludi is someone to cherish.

If you haven’t read our other interviews, please check out: Part 1 of interviews: X-men Origins Part 2 of interviews: Going Dark

As a scholar of fan studies, do you believe Romy fanfiction fulfills needs that Marvel never can? What needs might those be, for Romy fans?

Certainly I think that fanfic is built on the premise of filling in the gaps, scribbling in the margins (to quote the seminal fan studies scholar, Henry Jenkins!) and fixing perceived wrongs. Comics are unique in that regard because the characters and stories within them continue for years and even decades. Comics continuities are convoluted and complicated, and there is a constant churn of writers working on them. Many fans have followed characters for far longer than the writers, and may know the characters more intimately than the professionals. Comics are full of retcons and contradictory takes on the characters. And I think fanfic is an important medium for allowing fans to “fix” that, to negotiate it. Because of the ongoing nature of comics, and because the futures of the characters are always going to be nebulous and subject to the whims of Marvel and the writers indefinitely, I think it’s going to continue to be important. Romy may be married in the comics, but there will still be plenty to write about—kids, divorce, a reconciliation . . . who knows? ;) 

What do you think Romy readers seek out when they read fanfiction? If it’s wish fulfillment, what kinds of wishes are being fulfilled? If it’s looking for “gaps” that the comics skip over, what have you found to be the most common sorts of gaps?

I think Romy is a very interesting example of the “wish fulfillment” function of fanfiction. Because part of the mystique of that ship (no pun intended) is that they can’t touch, they can’t consummate their relationship . . . And fanfic is a way that fans can get them to touch, to work out that angst. I think that one of the staples of Romy fic is the sexual tension between the two, and how they resolve that; the push and pull between them. Sometimes these take place in epic, superheroic backdrops, sometimes in AUs, where they have no mutant powers and where the tension between them is born from other factors (such as already having significant others, or being enemies, or in illicit lines of work).

What draws you to AUs? Your stories aren’t a case of fanfiction filling what’s “between panels”; you tend to shift characters and relationships to entirely different settings, whether it’s a Strange Days–like world or another genre, like a Southern gothic procedural. Can you talk about AUs and how they play out in your imagination?

What I’ve always liked is world-building. One of my first large-scale writing projects was a fantasy trilogy called The Legend of Elu. Most of the fun I got from that was actually building the world, the kingdoms, the mythology, the theology, the languages, the history of that story. That definitely bled into my fanfic.

Now I tend to write canon stuff as one-shots, and novel-length stuff as AUs, because they give me more space to play with world-building. That was something I realised I enjoyed more when I wrote Threads. Writing all those little worlds in a series of one-shots felt too “small.” HoC was originally an expansion of the Threads tale Touch and Go, but it grew into something else, and since then, I’ve preferred to go the AU route for the longer-form stories. :)

We’re living in peak Romy times—I think we’re still reeling from the wedding! Let’s say you had the power to go back in time and drop a pin into an earlier moment in the Romy timeline that you felt truly represents what Romy means to you (which isn’t the same as when they’re happiest!). When and in what universe? Why this choice?

There are so many iconic moments from Romy’s past, but, for me personally, I always go back to their time in Valle Soleada (in X-Treme X-Men). That’s not because they’re happy per se, but because I think that that period was the perfect example of how great they worked together on every level, and was proof positive that they were a good match. I often say it, but I will say it again here, because it’s the truth, and y’all can fight me to the death over it—if there was a time they would’ve got married and I would’ve bought it 100%, it would’ve been in Valle Soleada.

On Tumblr, it seems a large contingent of Romy fans are women in their 30s who discovered Romy at a tender age, thanks to the animated series. This includes you and me! There are exceptions, of course. What’s it like for you to have been in the fandom from the early aughts? What changes in the fandom have you noticed between 2003 and 2018?

I really joined the fandom at an exciting time for Romy—they’d just got back together properly after all the turmoil of the Trial of Gambit. X-Treme X-Men was a treat for Romy fans, and Claremont wrote such a great dynamic between them. As fans we were all excited and happy and well-fed on all that Romy goodness.

So it was weird (not to mention disappointing) when the 2004 reboot happened, and Marvel did everything they could to tank Romy. Which is one thing, and I can stomach it if [it were] logically and well written, but it was just so terribly done that I think many of us just tapped out of the fandom completely. I’d say 2005–2018 were fallow years for the Romy fandom. Most (if not all) of the fan friends I made at that time completely left the fandom. For myself, as someone who enjoys writing AUs, it was the perfect time to branch out from writing in canon and fitting Romy into my own world.

Who are your influences? What writers do you feel a particular affinity for? Are there writers whom we might be surprised to discover informed your work, but you feel have, despite appearances?

I was heavily influenced by the dark, modern fairytales of Angela Carter about the time that I was writing Queen of Diamonds and Threads. She had a really magical way with words—her prose was lyrical, sensual, and unbelievably rich. She was a huge inspiration, but later I moved away from her tone, firstly because I felt I was doing a poor imitation of her, secondly because it wasn’t really appropriate for the direction I wanted to move my fics in, and lastly because I was becoming self-conscious of my insane verbosity and wanted to pare down my prose. That’s something I’m still working on!

At some point during the writing of House of Cards, I finally got round to reading Hitchiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, and I think it was Douglas Adams who convinced me to move away from Carter’s beautiful but too-flowery prose. I loved the way his narrative just sizzled. I’m bad at capturing that energy—but I do think that from HoC onwards, I’ve tried to learn to be more economical with my words—which is hard for a florid soul like mine. 

Threads—structurally at least—was influenced by Italo Calvino’s If On a Winter’s Night a Traveller, and later, by David Mitchell’s Cloud Atlas. 

Let’s say you can pair your fiction with other works of art—of all forms, films, paintings, music, etc.—as if you were pairing wines to foods. What other pieces of art might you say go along with yours?

Wow! OK—that’s hard. Threads I’d probably pair with Cloud Atlas (the book, not the film, which I haven’t yet watched). HoC—I don’t know that there’s any one thing I would pair it with, but you can bet a load of post-apocalyptic stuff was thrown into that stew, along with a bit of The Matrix and probably some Inception.

52 Pickup was influenced a lot by Asmus’s Gambit run, cos I really wanted to write a heist fic with Remy and Rogue rather than Remy and Joelle (who I freely admit kicked ass). But if I had to pair it with a piece of media, it’d be with the video game Remember Me, which dealt a lot with themes of how memories inform our identities, and the ethical concerns of having memories essentially become “documents” that are uploaded and shared digitally through the cloud.

This is a good segue to talk about high-low culture. We may not want to believe in a hierarchy of culture, but we can certainly talk about the differences between fanfiction and “regular fiction.” When you read fanfiction, do you approach it differently than you would regular fiction? Are your expectations for form, reading pleasure, or anything else different? If so, how so?

Interesting question! I don’t know whether I approach it differently per se, but I think that readers have different expectations of fanfic. Hopefully we all read “regular fiction” for the same reason we read fanfic—for pleasure. But I don’t think there’s really a binary between regular and fanfiction. I think both exist on a continuum. There is a lot of “regular fiction” (I prefer to call it “profic” or “professional fiction,” because I think that’s where the binary between the two exists) that is actually very close to fanfic, and vice versa. By that I mean that there is plenty of fanfic that is epic in scope, deals with serious themes, and might be considered “classics” if they weren’t fanfiction.

And there is also profic, like romance, that is more similar to fanfic in terms of the kind of functions that it serves. There is an illicit pleasure to reading romance—for example, it’s not the kind of thing you’d openly read in public! There’s a similarity between that and fanfic, and I think, as readers of fanfic, we anticipate some level of illicitness when we approach it—even if the illicitness is only in the format (i.e., it’s fanfiction!), not in the content.

Fun question: What role do you think explicit smut functions in a fic? How do you deal with smut in your work? There’s an interesting moment that’s not in HoC, in which you write about Gambit and Rogue’s first time having sex in his point of view. It’s a separate chapter that exists as its own entity on your fanfiction.net page. Notably, it is much more explicit than the scene in Rogue’s perspective. Can you talk a little bit about this decision?

Well, I do think that fanfic is a safe space for writers to explore their sexuality (and I think that’s a huge part of the reason why fic is looked down upon), and smut plays a significant role in that. And smut certainly plays a part in my own fics. HoC actually started out as a random smut scene that burgeoned into something far, far more. Generally, I do try to make the sex scenes have a purpose in the plot (’cos I’m kind of anal about plot structure!), but in the particular case of Slow Burn and the other HoC vignettes, those are more self-contained one-shots where I could explore things that I couldn’t explore in the main story. So I could indulge in the smut a bit more! And let’s be honest—Gambit’s dark sexuality makes it thrilling to write smut from his perspective—of course his “thoughts” are going to be more explicit! ;)

But I also think that it’s interesting to write their individual perspectives on their sexual encounters, because of that tension between their characters. Rogue is the quintessential virginal Southern Baptist gal who’s inexperienced; whereas Gambit is the sexually aggressive alpha male who’s probably never had a woman turn him down in his life. That makes for a very combustive love affair between the two, and makes it fun to write that love affair (and all the smut in-between) from both their points of view.

[renegaderoots]

BASIC INFORMATION

☠┋FULL NAME: Avery J. Williams ☠┋PRONUNCIATION: A-vree ☠┋NICKNAME(S): Avy, Av, AJ ☠┋TITLE: The Sleepwalker ☠┋OCCUPATION: Drug dealer ( see also: fortune teller, singer, waiter) ☠┋~AGE: 18-28. Plot dependent. ☠┋DATE OF BIRTH: 23rd October ☠┋GENDER: Cisgender ☠┋PRONOUNS: He/Him/His ☠┋ORIENTATION: Homoromantic Homosexual ☠┋NATIONALITY: English ☠┋RELIGION: Christian ☠┋SPECIES: Human ☠┋THREAT LEVEL: Moderate (not malicious, sometimes violent, defensive and aggressive)

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE

☠┋FACE CLAIM: Andy Biersack / Ash Stymest ☠┋EYE COLOUR: Light-blue ☠┋HAIR COLOUR: Naturally ginger but dyes it black ☠┋DOMINANT HAND: Right ☠┋HEIGHT: 5’4 or 162 centimeters ☠┋WEIGHT: 48 kg.   ☠┋TATTOOS:  He is literally a tattoo landscape, so describing his ink collection would take an entire century, but the roses on his hands are most notable along with a quote from Hermann Hesse’s Steppenwolf circling around his collarbone. ☠┋SCARS:  The most notable ones along with a constellation of burns are on his upper back, though there are other scarred areas as well. Most were souvenirs from an accident whereas others were self-inflicted. ☠┋PIERCINGS: one lip piercing, one nose ring ( usually wears studs), several ear piercings (Industrial, conch, auricle, upper lobe, helix, tragus, graduate lobe, smiley – honestly just ask me what part of his body isn’t pierced and we can all go home sooner) ☠┋GLASSES: Avery doesn’t need glasses.

PSYCHOLOGY INFORMATION

☠┋JUNG TYPE: INFJ ☠┋SUBTYPE: Intuitive Subtype ☠┋ENNEATYPE: 6w5 SX/SP ☠┋MORAL ALIGNMENT: Chaotic Neutral   ☠┋TEMPERAMENT: Melancholic/Choleric ☠┋SCHEMA: (NP) Negativity/Pessimism, (MA) Mistrust/Abuse, (EP) Emotional Deprivation (form C)

☠ ┋INTELLIGENCE TYPE: Visual/Spatial Intelligence

☠┋~IQ: 110 ☠┋NEUROTYPE: Definitely not neurotypical. ☠┋AT RISK? Possibly, although I can’t say for sure at this conjuncture. Likely depression, insomnia and Biploar Disorder II, as there’s a genetic predisposition on the maternal side of his family (his great-grandma had it, along with his mother.)

BACKGROUND INFORMATION

☠┋HOMETOWN: Dartford, England, though he was born in Boston. ☠┋CURRENT:  Visual-Spatial Intelligence, Intrapersonal Intelligence, Bodily-Kinesthetic Intelligence ☠┋LANGUAGE(S): English ( native language), German ☠┋SOCIAL CLASS: working class ☠┋EDUCATIONAL LEVEL: GCSE ☠┋PARENT #1: John Williams ☠┋PARENT #2: Allison  (Alisa) Williams neé Little (Klein) ☠┋SIBLING(S): Samantha Williams, 24, alive, estranged

☠┋MAIN SHIP: I ship Avery with stability and getting his shit together. ☠┋RELATIONSHIP STATUS: Single ☠┋CHILDREN: None

☠┋PET(S): Pet rats called Muffin, Sugar and Berry. ☠┋ADOPTED? No. ☠┋RAP SHEET? Surprisingly not, no. ☠┋PRISON TIME? No.

VICES / HABITS

☠┋SMOKES? Yes. He’s a chain smoker, in fact.   ☠┋DRINKS? Yes, excessively. Might’ve developed an addiction, though it’s unsure to know for certain as this conjuncture.   ☠┋DOES DRUGS? Only soft drugs.   ☠┋IS VIOLENT? Yes, he is. Avery’s type of violence is most often just on one level, namely the physical one. Unafraid to mess up somebody’s face twice his size, he’ll do so if and when he feels threatened – or, alternatively, when he really doesn’t like you. It’s not necessarily that he’s pone to violence, nor is he quick to hit and punch without first weighing the consequences, but it does happen. Only on rare occasions such as intimate settings is he emotionally violent if fearing abandonment.

☠┋HAS AN ADDICTION? Possibly. Alcoholism.   ☠┋IS SELF-DESTRUCTIVE? Yes. Self-harm (among which multiple suicide attempts number. Most frequently, these patterns are implemented through cutting, burning or scratching), habitual lying and high-risk reckless behavior along with excessive  promiscuity. ☠┋HABITS: swearing, smoking, cracking knuckles, a sweet tooth that’ll probably rot his teeth down to nothing one day, picking at nail polish, habitual lying, procrastination to the highest level imaginable, forgetting names of people (mostly because he doesn’t bother to remember them in the first place), purposefully argumentative, double-checks everything more often than Nolan (which is an accomplishment in and of itself bordering on obsessive), bites fingernails, snarls for no, grunts for yes and shrugs his shoulders for maybe (not the most communicative sort, obviously), drinks energy drinks and sugary stuff like water to stay away because he’s close to mortified by sleeping or the process of falling asleep (three to four hours of light sleep tops), leave him alone for a while and chances are he’ll have been playing with whatever object is in front of him for many minutes already, will use movie references to retro movies nobody knows (except maybe movie nerds themselves) when around somebody he can tolerate

☠┋HOBBIES: customizing his own clothing, drawing, sleeping in late, organizing everything to a T, cleaning, woodwork, collecting used up pencil stumps, skateboarding, street painting, collecting bibles without any attention to read through them, reading psychology books ☠┋TICS: none

☠┋OBSESSION(S): Avery is downright obsessed with establishing a thoroughly organized system and often can’t resist eliminating any and all ounce of disorder either in his flat or at the shop. He also has a great aversion towards unclean people and therefore spends a lot of time in the bathroom washing his hands. ☠┋COMPULSION(S): hoarding

MISCELLANEOUS INFORMATION

☠┋HOUSE: Slytherin ☠┋VICE: Wrath ☠┋VIRTUE: Kindness ☠┋ELEMENT: Air

☠┋ANGEL: Gabriel

☠┋MYTHOLOGICAL CREATURE: Sirens

☠┋ANIMAL: Scorpion

☠┋MUTATION: Invisibility, Air manipulation ☠┋WOULD SURVIVE POST-APOC? Yes.

STATUS INFORMATION

☠┋DEVELOPMENT: Developed ☠┋SHIPPING: Multiship ☠┋VERSE: Multiverse ☠┋VERSE TYPE: realism, magical realism, crime

☠┋CANON: His tattoo shop verse. ☠┋PLOTTING: Open ☠┋CREATION DATE: May 2014

 CHARACTER SUMMARY

 If you think you’ll encounter an angel because you’ve judged him by his looks alone, you will be deeply disappointed. In lieu of sweet tunes, you’ll get an earful of pirate-like swearing, profanity, and absolutely no filters. For better or worse, Avery is honest - sometimes brutally so - and doesn’t know the first thing about propriety. His morals are his pillars despite the dysfunctional mess that is his past; however, his own integrity is merciless and predominantly black or white. Regardless, you shouldn’t mistake him for level-headed or even cerebral; Avery is a complicated, contradictory clusterfuck of a person --- all white-knuckled protests aside, he is a very emotional lad, prone to anger issues, and an even poorer developed impulse control.

As somebody who became homeless when still a minor, Avery is no stranger to the ends to which some had to go in order to survive. He might not be gallant, buoyant or even very talkative, but he is humble, charitable and noticeably protective over those who have no means of defense. Nowadays, Avery stays afloat working odd jobs, the most notably one being his position as a drug dealer for the Morrison family. Beyond that, his ability to ascertain how full of shit people are has proved rather lucrative, too. In the end, he has been through too much, has seen too much and heard too much to be fazed by humanity’s depravity anymore, and thereby doesn’t dare reach for the stars. He still lives in an abusive home mentally sitting at disconcertingly silent dinner tables, and making tired excuses for angry welts under layers for him to have any motivation other than to simply sleepwalk through life.

 APPEARANCE DESCRIPTION

Swinging calloused fists, throwing uncouth threats left and right…at the imposing height of 5’4. Although Avery will still feed you your teeth if you reckon it’s cute to call him pipsqueak or any other derogatory remark as to his height, he has come to think of his lanky, tiny, and largely androgynous appearance as an advantage. Looks can deceive, his in particular, because if there’s anything he’s not, it’s helpless. Be that as it may, there are self-image issues along with a deeply-seated insecurity at play regarding his physique, and overall gentle aura, which he contrasts with a collection of tattoos. For attentive listeners, you will hear a mostly Bostoner accent mixed with a faint German undertone while his voice is deep, masculine, and has a raspy current to it. It is not a shock, though, that Avery’s demeanour doesn’t exactly inspire pedestrians to chat him up at a park. As for clothes: just be on the lookout for a scowling, tiny lad in black from head to toe.  

PERSONALITY DESCRIPTION

Contrary to his cantankerous tunes, Avery knows when words of thanks are in order, and he is not at all too prideful to express his gratitude. Anything you give him freely, whether time, trust, or tears is valuable to him. Generally speaking, however, he is best described as being of a melancholic-choleric temperament, a man of few words but decidedly strong convictions who won’t hesitate to play devil’s advocate in order to call you out on your own hypocrisy. What he isn’t, though is deceiving because honesty is an integral part of his belief system; the engine without which the machine would come to a complete standstill. What’s most important to note about his general disposition, additionally, is how much of a duality Avery can be. Endearing at times, and then downright base. This boils down to his anxiety frequently expressed through rage, and insecurity. Ambivalent doesn’t even begin to cover how his personality oscillates between aggressive and dependent absolutes. As enigmatic as he is towards others and himself, though, there’s nothing uncertain about the fact that he is secretly an idealist in a misanthropic realist’s clothing. He wants to believe only the best in people, but also knows when there’s nothing to be done other than to turn some away. In the same vein, Avery struggles with emotional expression – full stop. Due to trauma, genetic factors, and environmental influences, trust is nearly an impossible feat for him; that goes both ways: towards others and himself, thus, while fiercely instinctive, it requires a game guide to unlock personal dialogue, resulting in suspicion and rebellious behaviour to cover up the fear of abandonment.

SKILLS / COMPETENCES

By general standards, Avery’s academic gap in his CV doesn’t speak well for his skills or competences, as one would be quick to presume he’s got none at all, which isn’t true. Regardless of having only done the utmost necessary before dropping out of school, he’s not a monolingual. Since his mother has German roots, their household was bilingual, with English being the primary language in their earlier developmental stages, and German introduced at around six to eight years old respectively. His level of proficiency is high in both languages, making him bilingual despite no linguistic talent or inclination to broaden his horizon. There’s also something to note about his dexterity, for his hands aren’t only his most important tools in his career. Indeed, most of his hobbies revolve around crafting or creating something – woodwork being one example.  He is also, perforce, an amazing cook and is known to hand out free food to friends who are, unfortunately, still homeless. What’s more, he has been blessed with an impeccable singing voice --- hard, soft, raspy currents like ripples in a river. Up until middle school, too, Avery used to participate in competitive running marathons, along with a penchant for precarious hobbies like skateboarding and parkour, the latter of which he gave up after too many unsuccessful attempts and stays in the hospital. Lastly, and this is vital, he has a natural gift for reading others; he is not easily deceived.

INTERPERSONAL MANNER

How Avery approaches you or comes across is entirely dependent on you – because when he smells bullshit or feels in any way lied to, threatened or manipulated, you’ll encounter his belligerent, patronizing and stubbornly righteous side. If you’re straightforward with your intentions, Avery is more likely to warm and loosen up around you. All in all, he is easy to like, but hardly few really know him. Since his family is a subject best not breached and linked to survivor’s guilt, Avery, for now, is on his own, excluding Lin, Trish, and Síle. Sometimes, even, the lad refers to his own room as a coffin. Unsurprisingly, his sexual relations are strictly physical, and any romantic interest is generally suppressed. If he were actively searching, however, Avery would best respond to unabashedly frank men who are assertive or creative – physically, he likes his men tall, muscular, preferably inked, and not afraid to straight up ask him to fuck. Moreover, given his demons, Avery works very hard to keep the shreds of stability he has in his life, which is why you will not hear him argue unless it’s something he categorizes as fundamentally wrong; he absolutely detests screaming or raised voices.

 Additional notes:

His voice claim is the same, i.e. Andy. Is anyone surprised?

Frequently lewd and downright tactless towards men, which is not reminiscent of his bad flirting skills but rather an indicator to please leave him the fuck alone.

Sugary sweets as bribery? 100% effective

Drinks an unhealthy amount of energy drinks to doze rather to deeply fall asleep because the feeling of falling asleep makes him incredibly anxious - night terrors are common.

Listens to bad German punk band and dub step. Definitely don’t allow him to play his music should he ever be in your car lest you’ll suffer profusely.

Has the almost compulsive need to play with items directly in front of him.

His younger sister detests him for walking out on her and leaving her with an alcoholic, abusive dad. Years prior, their mother left one day and never returned.  She hopes he’s dead in a ditch.

His relationship with religion is...complicated, to make use of a gross understatement as his family were zealots who only accepted their truth as the way to live. Consequently, Avery also has self-image issues and low self-esteem.

He feels more comfortable and considerably safer around women as far as platonic relationships go, and has an easier time opening up to them.

Natural ginger. Heat and Avery? Not a good mix.

Smells faintly of turpentine oil and citrus-scented utensils for cleaning because he is a neat freak.

Do not allow him anywhere near paper because he will doodle on anything.

Utilizes his art as a means to express himself emotionally.

[sylvieusedhyperbeam]

annnd hacking away in my own little corner

just.  casually hammering away on my own Villainous AU don’t mind me folks.

AU isn’t really titled yet so for now i’m’a just call it ‘Virtuous’.  idk i’ll think of something better.  if there’s an AU out there called Virtuous already then i’ll work faster to think of something better and change it.  for now i’ll... just have to ask you to be patient.  :I;;

White Hat

Not much different from other White Hats of various other AUs, though the backstory/origin is different.  As a youngling incarnation, he was an embodiment of good that went about the multiverse to keep things in balance against the Chaos, which his fuckhead ‘bro’ Black Hat embodies, respectively. 

Used to be a lot more erratic and somewhat violent in this purpose, since in those first few early millions/billions of years, he operated a lot more around instinct than reason or logic.  He was a force that didn’t really have a chance to... think about what he was doing.  In other words, yeah, in those early ages of the multiverse he saw things in very black-and-white terms and he and Black Hat caused some shit for some worlds.

Of course, he does know better now and has developed a much more refined, intelligent response to evil and malevolence.  And nowadays, rather than a mansion of splendor and indulgence, he lives in what some might describe as a white and turquoise airship that comes down to base to settle every now and then, lending it the appearance of a mansion. 

He runs a business similar to Black Hat’s, where he gives heroes that serve the Light shields, cures, elixirs, all the stuff they need to help balance the multiverse and drive back the Chaos.  He doesn’t do it for money, of course, though heroes ARE inclined to give him some generous donations because ‘eeeey, airships that sail the multiverse don’t keep themselves in repair, not without White Hat seriously taxing his reserves, anyway.

These days he’s very polite, as well as far kinder, more compassionate than he was in his early days.  He’s also a huge dork with a soft spot for antiques who loves learning about the cultures and shit of other worlds, since even as old as he is, new worlds emerge in the multiverse all the time and so he feels very humbled by it all and seeks to always learn more!  Loves gardening, loves cooking, loves art, loves anything involving the act of creation or bringing harmony, really.  Also really loves singing, and his singing voice is very soothing, pleasant, with the inherent ability to help ease away sadness or anxiety. 

Standard design for him might be like any standard White Hat, though I’m contemplating teal on him instead of blue.  :|a  HMMM.

Doctor Trug

To answer potential questions, roughly translated, trug can mean a lot of things.  One of which includes ‘deception, swindle, elusiveness’, meaning yeah, Trug was basically a conman alchemist who worked his way up to a professional thief of many talents.  Being well versed in both dark magic and evil sciences as well as being manipulative as shit, he served the Chaos and sought to undermine the Light as a more direct agent.  How he managed to get the direct attention of the eviler Embodiments, well slap my ass and call me Betty, that’s anyone’s guess.

Buuuut a mission gone wrong with an attempt on the life of an early Embodiment kinda found him facing some hard-ass time in a multiversal prison.  Which... yeah, a questionably normal human facing time in THIS particular prison, it was bound to be a preeeeetty bad time.  Because you don’t wanna end up at in a multiversal prison.  You really don’t.

Until of course White Hat intervened and opted to ‘rehabilitate’ him, and seeing a chance out of serving time at Holy Shit Eldritch Horror Sing-Sing, Trug of course ‘jumped’ on the chance and played it up all ‘OH THANK YOU SIR WOW SIR SUCH MERCY SIR’ thinking ‘wow what a fucking sucker’.  He assumed that working for White Hat would be simple enough if he just played on White Hat’s kindness but... yeah, it’s a hell of a lot more taxing than he originally thought it would be.  TEEHEE.

Anyway, Trug is rude as shit and looks out for number one.  He’s an ambitious motherfucker though, with a really solid work ethic based mostly around prideful standards he holds himself to whenever he’s researching a cure or a counteraction to a villain’s bullshit.  He thinks nothing of experimenting on human beings or using dark magic for his own means, but White Hat forbids it on all counts, and well... talented as he might be, Trug isn’t stupid and knows better than to try going toe to toe with an Embodiment. 

He can also be very manipulative when he wants to be, and often is for either something he wants or just for the hell of it.  He’s the kind of asshole who will literally argue that the sky is green just for the sake of arguing, if he’s bored enough.  He hates people, for the most part, though he does enjoy people-watching to an extent and making up bullshit backstories about them (if you’ve ever seen Always Sunny in Philadelphia, you get my meaning here). 

Don’t really have a design in mind for him yet.  LMAO i act is if though i’ll actually draw them, or that i actually CAN draw for that matter.

Gemencia    

A very peppy young girl with a few magical abilities, in lieu of the more physical/likely genetically mutated abilities of her respective counterpart.  Gemencia is a girl who can utilize telekinesis, as well as low-grade stasis fields that can freeze people or objects in place for a short time, about ten or fifteen seconds or so.  How she does this, well, she can’t say even she knows.  She doesn’t really remember much about her own backstory, just that she kinda-sorta raised herself in the more nature/magic based world she came from before she decided to become a treasure hunter.

And BOY HOWDY does she love treasure hunting.  Like, the girl is GOOD GOD unafraid of anything on so many levels, so she often tends to do crazy parkour shit on the face of rocky mountains, pick fights with people ten times her size, annnnd maybe do a whole mess of shit without really thinking.  She tries to do RIGHT by people, don’t get me wrong, but if the rules look like they need bending or broken?  She’ll bend ‘em a little.  Or a break ‘em.  A lot.  And not give any shits.

Her impulsive love for adventure and helping people in her own crazy way eventually led her to hear tales of the Embodiments, super eldritch beings that maintained the balance of a neat nifty thing called the multiverse, and instantly became determined to see it all for herself.  Loving to do things for people and help people, of course she wanted to seek out the Light Embodiments and become the most awesome treasure-hunting hero the multiverse had ever seen.

SO!  Seeking out White Hat to be her teacher seemed as logical an action as any!

With the help of some magic users who showed her how to travel to other worlds, she kinda world-hopped and bummed around for a while in search of White Hat until she finally found him, when his airship settled in the same world she was in by pure chance. 

She just... kinda started following him around.  And when he got back to his airship one day he just sorta found her there, where she was all ‘HEY ‘SUP I’M STAYING HERE NOW LOOK I BROUGHT CHIPS :D’ and White Hat just kinda... sighed and rolled with it.

Gemencia loves, loves, LOVES spontaneity.  She’s a wanderer at heart, and loves seeing what entire worlds have to offer.  She loves a good brawl every now and then, cartoons, hard hitting punk rock music, collecting artifacts and treasures, and has a refined interest in mythology and lore that might surprise people who don’t know her very well.  As a treasure hunter, she’s been inside old temples, ruins, torn palaces, catacombs, all things that have exciting stories of old war and battles and ancient evils falling at the hands of ‘super TOTALLY badass’ heroes, and it’s from these legends that she became inspired to strike out on her own and become ‘THE MOST SUPER BADASS HERO’ that ever hero’d. 

Not above swearing, indulging (be it huge meals or drinking), or pulling dangerous/impulsive stunts though when White Hat doesn’t keep her in line.  If you befriend her, you have a fiercely loyal buddy for life who will fuck others UP if they try to mess with you, but be warned that you’ll be getting dragged along for a few... adventures when the mood strikes her.   

Her design includes light blue hair, and rather than a lizard hat, she has a big-ass fox hat with long fox-styled hair.  :U  I chose this because foxes are natural foragers, known for leaping to literally pounce into the ground to find their prey.  Gemencia is about the same as a treasure hunter, known to leap right into things in search of the various rare jewels and treasures and ‘OOOH NEAT’ artifacts that she kinda hoards away even if she doesn’t know WTF they even do.  Also tends to wear orange and black stripes, in lieu of Dementia’s magenta.  :T 

EDIT you all thought i forgot 505′s counterpart didn’t you?  ....well you’re half right.  i half-forgot, half-okay-what-the-hell-am-i-doing.  but anyway, here we go!

404

404 was originally an animatronic for a family restaurant - no not THAT one this ain’t a FNAF crossover get that shit outta here.  He was a regular animatronic up until Trug decided it would be super funny and edgelordy to reprogram it to not only frighten kids, but hell, rob the restaurant’s safe during closing hours and bring him the loot.  The restaurant owners kinda pitched him, Trug took him, and installed a few more fun TRICKS on him while he was at it to make him a better partner-in-crime.  Because why not, it would be a waste of perfectly good machinery otherwise.

Of course, it began smoothly enough at first... until 404′s AI kiiinda-sorta gained sentience.  After that point, he became lazy, grouchy, and at times outright refused to obey Trug’s orders on the grounds of ‘I don’t feel like it fuck you’. 

Trug deactivated him and decided to use him for spare parts, but kinda never got around to disassembling him.  When White Hat took on commuting Trug’s sentence, the two traveled to Trug’s hideout so that Trug could pack in order to feel as comfortable as possible while out traveling the multiverse with White Hat.  White Hat took notice of the big cuddly looking bear and whoops reactivated him, and then promptly forbade Trug from deactivating him again because LOOK AT HIM ALL HE NEEDS IS LOVE.

Trug wishes 404 would rip White Hat’s leg off and beat the shit out of him with it.

404 won’t do it out of pure spite.

Anyway, 404 contrasts 505 by way of being pessimistic, coldly logical, seeing no point in frivolities and only wishing to lie around all day and eat.  Thanks to Trug’s alterations, he does have nifty things like heat sensors, night vision, and even a vehicular mode where he can turn into a small car for quick escapes, but good luck getting him to actually use a single one of these things without bribing him with honey. 

He also contrasts 505 by being... well, mechanical, instead of organic. 

404′s design consists of purple fur, and atop his head is a little satellite dish instead of a flower.  His eyes are big red iris shutters, the kind you see on camera app logos, with a yellow center.

[canvaswolfdoll]

CanvasWatches: Miss Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid

Sarcastic lead? Goofy supporting cast? Loving use of nerdity? Maid uniforms? Fantastical elements stuffed into a slice-of-life narrative? Well, that’s certainly something for me!

Also, it’s alarming how often Quetzalcoatl's been popping up in my work and entertainment. I mean, it’s not an excessive amount, to be honest, but considering my original assumption was ‘Obscure Mythological Figure improperly transplanted into an anime film’, anything more than once is notable.[1]

Perhaps this is punishment for using a mondegreen of the name as my sign off phrase…

Anyways, Miss Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid! It was spoken of highly by an anime reviewer I follow, it was on Funimation, and I need to justify that subscription beyond letting my brother watch Case Closed all the time, so…

Let’s talk about the show.

In a bit of an oddity, I’ve found the Opening and Closing sequences very absorbing. Now, I’m not one to ever skip either in a series, as it’s usually well animated, the music is catchy, and it’s a couple minutes to settle in or grab food or whatever, plus (depending on the player) it can be a chore to skip anyways. There are often neat details hidden away, too, and it’s fun to learn the context of images as you go through the series.

The OP in this case struck me by how it triggered not the ‘Ah, Anime opening song’ switch in my brain, but a ‘Ah, Visual Novel opening song’ switch, which is a weird switch to learn I have, since I haven’t actually played that many Visual Novels. Still, the music itself is upbeat, very energetic, and very “Oh yeah! Let’s get into this! Time to read a bunch, make choices, and seduce a girl!” But I have no agency in the upcoming events, Anime! Why are you trying to make me hyped? It’s working, but I don’t understand the effort.

It’s also paired with the trippiest imagery I’ve seen in awhile, with fractal dragons and people spinning like falling seedlings. Still bright and colorful, and there’s faces to meet over the course of the show, but it’s just utterly bizarre. Maybe because I don’t get exposed to purely comedic animes that often I’m not used to it, but it’s still a ride that I lack the tools to properly contextualize.

Actually, now that I think about it and listen to the song divorced from the imagery, the song reminds me of Rune Factory Frontier’s opening. Huh…

The EP, on the other hand, is a more reasonable montage of Daily Life, with a song that’s also fun. It actually strikes me as more of an OP piece. I really like the song. Considering it’s been a very recent realization for me that Music Albums are intentionally curated objects meant to be listened to straight through to convey meaning, instead of a bunch of singles thrown on a disc, I may not be the guy for musical criticism.

Music is an ineffable magic to me. I lack the tools to create or understand it, but some songs are good?

This had been a tangent. Let’s go to what I’m comfortable with: storytelling!

So let’s take a brief look at something most people take for granted: the episode titles and, in relation, names.[3]

Naming things is a hard task which I have managed to become moderately good at, a fact I derive from the time a classmate in a scriptwriting class asked with mild awe at how I came up with so many names[4] for my 10-minute comedy play. The secret, as with all artistic aspects you find difficult, is figure out a functional system and maintain it.

So I’ve developed a few methods for characters:

Start with a theme (in the case of my play, I was actually going through alphabetically as characters are mentioned) but don’t be afraid to break it if you feel like it.

Stick with one or two syllable names. The longer the name, the harder it’ll be to remember. Same with not going too archaic or foreign with the name. If your audience can’t remember the character’s name or how to pronounce it, they’ll focus more on that than the story.

  If you break rule two, it’s on you to have a nickname prepared that follows rule two. If you don’t, I’m going to call you Windy Jerk in my post RPG Session write-ups.[5]

Which is fine for characters, but then there’s titles, which I’m no good at. Titles need to be both intriguing and vague, to draw in an audience, but keep them surprised. This is compounded when you have 13-26 episodes to name. Some shows do a good job at consistently coming up with names, or at least semi-adequate puns, and others just call the episodes ‘[Episode/Chapter/Part]’ and the number in the sequence. Both of these are valid techniques.[6]

Which is why Word Salad Titles stick out so much, and why I love them yet can’t quite master using them myself. They manage being vague not by carefully revealing little information, but overloading with data so fast the audience doesn’t have time to parse it before the shows starts.

Also, they just sound funny.

What’s intriguing about Dragon Maid is that it’s not an extreme example of the Word Salad some comedy animes tend towards (Exclamatory statement! Vague plot summary), but it is a style very similar to myself.[7]

Dragon Maid’s episode titles follow the structure of exclamatory sentences, then gentle snark about the title in parenthesis. While I don’t use exclamations often, the statement followed by snark is something I do with my art work [[Maybe provide examples?]] and is even punctuated the same way, with parentheses implying an aside.

Which is also the speech style of our titular Miss Kobyashi. (Check out my sweet transition!)

Ms. Kobayashi is the first character I’ve deeply related to in a long while. Sarcastic and pretty asocial, she starts the series living alone in an one-bedroom apartment and has a single friend from work. Otherwise, Kobayashi is content with her solitude, engaging in quiet interests. It's not exactly emotionally fulfilling, but it's okay. She doesn't really feel the need for more.

Which is just the opening needed for a Manic Pixie Dream Girl! In the form of a Yandere Dragon Maid Girl.

Manic Pixie Dream Girls have received some negative press,[8] which isn't completely unwarranted, but sells the trope short. After all, when you really get down to it, they're the personification of the inciting incident. A character whose arrival kicks starts the protagonist’s journey of self improvement. Sometimes they need to be dragged kicking and screaming for the first leg, because it's funnier that way. Often times, when using a Dream Girl character, writers take a romantic angle because… that's a popular and relatable motivation I guess? The problem comes when the narrative is locked close to the protagonist, leaving not enough space to develop the Dream Girl beyond that scope.

Fortunately, since Miss Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid is a serial narrative, and it's Tohru bringing in most of the supporting cast, our Dragon Maid doesn't fall into that pit trap.

Tohru is a fish out of water, which I really love seeing when the environment is our own. It’s a good method to work observational humor into a work, as well as odd ball humor for the alien being. Usually, there is an air of innocence to the character. Tohru, meanwhile, comes from what is implied to be a war-torn fantasy realm, and prefers to default to chaos and destruction when unsure.

It’s a good take.

Kobayashi doesn’t take too much interest in Tohru’s origins, greeting (most) new acts of magic and property damage with half-lidded neutrality or annoyance. Since the focus of the show is ‘The supernatural adjusting to the mundane,’ Kobayashi’s disinterest is important. There are many other shows you can watch if you want to see a normal person come to grips with a magic world,[9] so Kobayashi needs to act as a guide character for the normal world.

Even as these dragon interlopers force her into a parental role and build out her friend circle.

That first point is possibly one of more unique traits, as rarely do Animes present their protagonist taking on the role of adoptive parent. Or parent at all. Maybe a few world-wandering shows will have found families, but I can’t think of another example where the character’s arc is that of becoming more domestic.

Which is why I appreciate Kanna.

Kanna is the second dragon to move from The Other World to Our World, banished for playing too many pranks to get attention from her parents. However, despite this supposed impish nature, she’s the most reserved of the Dragons, content to living like she’s Kobayashi’s nine-year old daughter, with Tohru acting as sort of an older sister. I think this is kind of a lost opportunity, because we could’ve kept all that, and also have Kanna play a few small pranks from time to time out of boredom and discontent. That could’ve been a nice, additional reason for Kobayashi to enroll Kanna in school: not out of malice but to give the young dragon some engagement during the day.

Then Fafnir and Queztal ‘Lucoa’ Coatl start visiting, then moving into the neighborhood.

Fafnir is my favorite of the dragons. He’s initially introduced as your usual bloodthirsty and treasure-obsessed dragon, which is fine, but then the series uses those traits to have him comfortably slip into a NEET lifestyle, which is hilarious. He gets to enact violence in video games and collect treasures in the form of promotional items, while still staying a grump.

Lucoa is… she started as the Sane member of the Dragon cast, giving exposition on what Tohru was like before and generally just being chill. However, in moving her to the world, she signs herself up as a familiar for a young mage, and starts… creeping on him is the best I charitably describe it. Shouta has no interest in these advances, and watching it played out on screen isn’t charming. Also, I’m afraid I have to align myself as opposed to the ‘Patriarchy’ line, because it does seem out of character.[10]

About halfway through, Elma arrives, after seven episodes of being the mysterious water dragon in the opening, inspiring me to see if I couldn’t align the dragons with the Rune Factory dragons.[11]

I… like Elma, but she’s underutilized. After her introductory episode, she’s just food obsessed and does literally nothing of consequence. She doesn’t even get a human to bond with like the others. Nothing is fleshed out for her. Unfortunate, as she looks cute with her glasses.

As a part of the theme, most of the dragons[12] are given a human to who they grow close.

Tohru, obviously, has Kobayashi. Tohru is very direct with her affections, while Kobayashi has to warm up to her dragon maid, and the exact degree Kobayashi returns the affections (whether it’s platonic or romantic on her end) isn’t pinned down exactly.

In contrast, Kanna has Saikawa, who has an obvious crush on Kanna, which she hides poorly. Though Kanna acts oblivious to what she does to Saikawa, Kanno does indicates an interest in… some sort of relationship that parallels Kobayashi and Tohru.

Actually, the show seems to have a problem with putting minors into sexual situations. It’s fine with Kanna and Rika, as they are essentially the same age and Saikawa’s squeeing, though transparent, is kept at an age-appropriate level. The two only have the one moment while visiting Saikawa’s house that’s uncomfortable, and that’s initiated by Kanna.

Shouta and Lucoa are just uncomfortable.

Fanservice is a contentious subject. What is okay, and what crosses a line? What level of slapback against perverts makes it even? Why am I (seemingly) one of the few that takes no umbrage against MHA’s Mineta but dislike Lucoa’s portrayal?

I typically avoid Anime that put sexual fanservice as one of its selling points. For example, before starting on Dragon Maid, I watched the first two episodes of WorldEnd: What are you doing at the end of the world? Are you busy? Will you save us? which is an epic word salad of a title which invokes the image of some shy person trying to ask someone out on a date that’s also a world-saving quest, but doesn’t want to over step. However, it quickly became clear the focus is pretty much a rescue romance focused on a bunch of characters the narrative goes through pain to tell you are 15 at the oldest. Also, a troll that wants to eat the protagonist which, recent meme culture aside, would’ve been an interesting dynamic to watch. Too bad the rest of the introductory episodes were too skeevy.

Which is to say, I’m easily tossed when a piece of media’s centerpoint is fanservice, made worse when it’s creepy fanservice to the detriment of world and narrative.

Then there’s Mineta who, foolishly, I’m going to try and defend now? Because the subjects of Mineta’s perversions are also approximately 15 years old, as above. However, Mineta is the same age as his classmates, which flattens the power dynamic.

‘But Canvas! It’s an excuse to show the audience fanservice of 15-year olds!’ you may say.

Okay. It’s a Shonen. The target audience are young males, approximately the same age as the cast. Are you really going to say you didn’t have a couple crushes on your peers as a teenager? It’s okay to let teenagers be attracted to other teenagers. As for the adult members of the audience? Let them smile whimsically at what it was like to be that age.

And his peers do admonish and punish him for going too far. If it’s not enough punishment for you, well, that’s up to your interpretation. I give it a pass because the tone is kept light and Mineta unable to do any actual harm. And comedy works best through exaggeration. A man getting stabbed is tragic. A man getting impaled onto an oversized firework that shoots into the air and explodes is slapstick. Also, the kid’s 15, he has time to mature and get character progression.

But you know who I never hear any ill words against? Midnight. Superheroine in a skintight outfit, whose schtick is bondage, and uses flirty tones towards students. Now that’s super uncomfortable. Because she is in a position of authority, and receives zero pushback for how she acts around her students.[13] Yet, the fanbase seems to give her a pass. Why? She actually acts more predatory than Mineta, and her power literally knocks her opponents out. She is dripping with poor implications.

I could go in depth, but I think that’s enough of a baseline to continue the review. The appropriateness of Fanservice depends on the viewer, and can be fickle, so excuse me if I can’t give a bullet point list of my own policies.[14]

So, let’s return to Miss Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid, which undoubtedly has strong element of fanservice. Why does it (mostly) succeed?

Well, first off, it’s kept tongue in cheek. The adult female dragons have ridiculous proportions, which gets lampshaded heavily, but their huge tracts of land are rarely used as a value judgement on the cast. They’re magical beings, if they want to look that way, it’s on them.

Next, there’s little power imbalance in the relationships. Tohru begins the series making her intentions towards Kobayashi clear, but after a couple rejections, the lines are established and respected. Tohru loves Kobayashi, but she wants any return in affections to be gained honestly. So even with Tohru’s immense physical and magical strength, and Kobayashi being placed in the role of ‘Master’, they’re both equal in establishing boundaries and respecting them.

And tone is very important. It’s a comedy series, so actions and emotions can be big and exaggerated. So, exaggerated proportions, exaggerated yuri-teasing, exaggerated violence, and exaggerated reactions. Saikawa happily screams every time Kanna does something cute, and it works because it’s a comedic reaction.

However, Lucoa breaks these rules. She answers Shouta’s summons and becomes his familiar. However, Shouta is maybe 10 or eleven to Lucoa’s presented, let’s say, late-twenties, and Lucoa comes on to this literal child. A child who rejects the advances and explicitly tells her not to. And Lucoa can’t claim ignorance, so she’s intentionally violating boundaries. It’s unbalanced power, ignores established lines, and turns Lucoa’s physical form into a joke, which all shifts the comedic tone.

Then (and I originally wanted to avoid this topic) the dub gives her a line about changing to more conservative dress because she was growing tired of patriarchal pressure. Lucoa had spent the series to the point as the most overtly sexualized character by her own decision, even getting into legal trouble once or twice, and creeping on a child. Then the writing wants to try and shame the audience over a character placed before them. It’s a line that might’ve worked if delivered by Tohru or Elma,[15] as it would’ve continued the theme of the the world pushing back against Lucoa. It’s also winter, so passing it off as the ex-goddess caving to nature would have worked, especially since the feathered serpent is from a tropical climate, and is a giant snake, so needing to bundle up against cold works.

I should not be forming opinions about this mythology! Why are you doing this to me, anime?

So, late-run Lucoa aside, Miss Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid is a fun show with strong world building, an interesting story, and pretty good comedy. I recommend it.

If you enjoyed this review, you should check out my other writings. I like talking about things, so if you want to send me asks, I’d be happy to engage. Also, hey, I have a patreon, in case you want to support me and my various endeavours. Thanks for reading.

Kataal Lucoa.

[1] I was kind of sort of hired to write a children’s play about Quetzalcoatl once, and I was not the person to suggest it.[2] [2] It was an okay piece. There was talk of maybe developing it further, but to be honest, South American Mythology doesn’t interest me. [3] A topic I must’ve covered before, but I can’t remember where. Repeated lessons can be good, though, so tough it out. [4] To be fair, there were only two active characters on stage, one body, and three further mentioned names, for a total of six. I still take pride because I lack confidence in names. [5] I only do this when I’m a player. As a GM I try to respect player choices, but still, throw me a bone, please. [6] This is why my reviews have the formula of Canvas_____: Review Subject. [7] I am vain and like things that remind me of myself. [8] Says the never been kissed white guy… [9] I recommend Digimon! [10] However, it’s a brief throwaway line, so I’m not one to make a fuss. Just gentle tutting. [11] It falls apart very quickly. Terrable could be Lucoa, but there’s no one for Ventuswill. [12] Or ex-goddess, in the case of Lucoa. [13] Student-Teacher romances being, of course, a bugbear that’s been growing for me recently. [14] It’d probably be mostly glasses focused, anyways. [15] Who is lawfully aligned. And would’ve given her more than food to stress about.

[royal-writer]

Essie - questionnaire

Just trying to get to know Essie better, ignore me! Will add more later.

1. Does s/he enjoy puzzles?

Not particularly. Even given nothing to do, Essie would probably prefer much anything else.

2. Does s/he enjoy education?

I don’t even know if she had a real education. I’m sure she learned more on her own means. I think she’s pretty neutral on learning. It helps better you but she doesn’t see it as fun but neither does she see it as terrible.

3. What is his/her sexual orientation?

Pansexual Panromantic.

4. Is s/he right-handed, left-handed, or ambidextrous?

Right-handed but ambidextrous casting spells cuz, well, ya almost gotta be..

5. Is s/he fashionable?

Essie don’t give a fuck. She wears what she likes, or wears what is suitable to the weather, or wears shit just to piss people off. So probably not.

6. What is their favorite food(s)?

Okay, here goes: smoked salmon on a bed of greens, herb roast pheasant, venison steak cooked rare to med-rare with roasted potatoes, garlic clam soup, mushroom and leek stew, berry tarts with mint, stuffed trout, pickled duck eggs, sharp cheeses, sunflower seeds, almonds, honeycakes, and she has a preference for drinking spiced ale, orchid wines, and elven made wines that are sweeter and aromatic. I can also see her having a taste for tea, particularly with honey, and sweet or spiced ciders. Maybe some hard spirits in a group atmosphere.

7. Has s/he ever broken a bone?

Nope, not yet at least.

8. Any interests or hobbies?

She enjoys magic, even using it to make kids happy. She enjoys dancing, secretly. Gambling maybe, uh... going on adventures obviously. Will add more if I think of it; she’s lived a life of survival so she probably doesn’t hide many hobbies.

9. Does s/he consider themself organized?

lmao no and she knows that. Ms. Throw-It-All-In-The-Bag.

10. How does s/he handle feeling nauseous?

No food, only liquids. Try laying down. If it doesn’t stop after a while, try walking around slowly in hopes to agitate self enough to just hurl.

11. What is his/her full name?

Essätha Medüza - the last name is a kick on Medusa from mythology.

12. Introvert or extrovert?

She’s a wanna-be-extro. Doesn’t trust others well, but has a desire to fit in and hang with others. At the moment she’s honestly more intro by nature though.

13. Can s/he cook?

Probably okay. Still prone to burning food from time to time lol whoops. But for the most part it’ll be edible, probably just not super tasty.

14. Did s/he have any friends growing up?

Yes! I plan on doing art for some of ‘em eventually.

15. How does s/he react to storms? Being caught in the storm?

Essie likes a good rainfall. Probably doesn’t mind being caught in them, even ‘bad’ storms, so long as it isn’t snow. Too damn cold.

16. Does s/he collect anything?

Nope. Maybe scars. //bricked// Nah because of her lifestyle, she’s not one to gather trinkets or stuff. Necessities and useful stuff only really.

17. Is s/he religious?

lol nope. Doesn’t care for gods or religion or any of that junk.

18. What inspires him/her?

I don’t know... uh, music for dancing. Sunsets and sunrises. The idea that life can get better. Transformation/growing.

19. Do they have a role model?

Maybe her mom, despite not knowing her. Eventually I’m sure she’ll see some of her fellow team members in this way.

20. What’s their favorite joke?

Probably secretly snake puns. Examples: “let me give you a hiss”, “viper that smirk off your face”, “I’ll snake some puns in there”, etc.

21. How would your character describe his/her friends? Lover? Parents?

dnd group companions to be determined.

Opal: (kind stranger) Orange furry cat woman. Seems to follow her own moral code of good which is pure and generous. Pretty kind.

Kraw: (teacher) Bird man of tans, reds, and dark browns/blacks. Grumpy but has a good heart. May try eating you if you’re an animal or can turn into an animal but otherwise nice. Drinker but a sad drinker when he does.

Solace: (ally/best friend) Outgoing, bubbly, considerate reddish-pink tiefling with obsidian eyes and violet blue-toned hair. She’s a rebel but is caring despite her dicey past. Essie considers her a better person than herself.

Phoenix: (aquitaine) Lady crazypants. Charcoal skin with scar-like markings that glow like lava flow when she’s using her powers. Fiery colored eyes and hair. Very much gives a masculine vibe. Will kill you with no regrets. Something’s wrong with her but she is willing to work with others for her own gain which is relatable.

Bretella: (frienemy) Considered a trustworthy ally. Green skinned redhead with golden eyes. Tends to weary flashy or seductive clothing. Will bail you out of a situation but patronize you later. High self-esteem.

Miz'ri: (enemy) A lost friend. Light grey skin, white hair, pale lilac eyes. Essie wishes that the millions of things that went wrong between them hadn’t. She hopes there’s still godo to be found in Miz’ri. A sad, broken soul.

Hepsiba: (mother) Truly the most beautiful person in existence. Warm, loving, considerate, gentle, sweet, gorgeous. Hepsiba is gone now, but her memory is still a vibrant light of warmth. Essie probably looks to the stars and likes to think her mom is up there, staring down at her. Mom was an auburn-skinned beauty with brown eyes.

Tyfiell: (father) Never met him. Mom spoke well of him, but Essie doesn’t think well of someone who ditched her mom. Said to be a dark-skinned Yuan-Ti Pureblood with dark eyes and a wicked smile. Rogue class.

22. How would s/he describe themself?

LOL nothing good unfortunately... She thinks she’s physically ugly due to how she was treated by others when she was young. She doesn’t find redeemable qualities in herself too much, either. Resident snake lady would probably say “I don’t got time for this” if asked. “I’m a scaly Yuan-Ti woman, hi.”

23. What is his/her birthday? Star sign? Do they fit it?

April 12, which would make their zodiac the Aries. It sounds semi fitting, as they’re labeled as ‘courageous, confident, short-tempered, and impulsive’ but like anything else, there’s some manners that aren’t perfectly fitting (optimistic, aggressive, etc).

24. How good is s/he at mending clothes?

She doesn’t know the Mending ability lol! Kidding aside, I don’t believe it’s her hobby or anything. I mean, if you look at some of her clothes, they’ve got tears and threads pulled free. Probably not.

25. How does s/he react to someone spilling something on them?

Depends on the atmosphere? 90% of the time she’ll realize it’s an accident, jump when it happens, and then request the server or whomever fetch something to help clean up the mess- not impolitely just with some urgency in her tone. She’d probably only have a .1% chance going off an the server because hey, shit happens, but if she’s in a bad mood already she may snap at anyone around she’s unhappy with at the moment.

26. How does s/he react to being approached by law enforcement?

‘Oh shit time to run they’re probably after me’ is her thought processing.

27. Do they paint/draw?

Nah, not really her cup of tea.

28. Does s/he prefer any musical instruments?

Essie can’t play, but she probably enjoys winds and strings for daily life, but the occasionally ‘sick beat’ of a big band of instruments to dance to would be A+.

29. If they had a tumblr, what would their account name be?

venomspikedwine

30. How good are they at keeping an eye on their money? Do they also splurge frequently?

Admittedly, Essatha enjoys hoarding funds. As someone who grew up with little, she’s a bit of a hoarder and is very unlikely to misplace even a copper piece. If she splurges, she’s likely drunk or enjoying a ‘luxury’ she didn’t have much as a child (ex: tarts), or items useful for survival, combat, friends, etc.

31. 3-5 random pieces of trivia about them that doesn’t come up often?

Essie loves music; especially pieces with a soft melody. She grew a garden once. Lastly she has had no real schooling; she’s mostly self-taught or listened in on others or hired other’s to teach her. This might be one of the reasons why she’s a bit of a slow reader.

32. Does s/he prefer dawn or dusk?

She feels more ‘lively’ during dawn but enjoys dusk for the twilight glow, the stars, etc. So both with maybe a slight preference for dusk.

33. Have them describe themself in 3 words!

(no, Essie, you can’t use ‘snake lady’ for 2 words, use adjectives).

confident, misunderstood, bull-headed

34. How would s/he react to someone confessing they have a crush on them?

All the blushing. So much blushing. Open-mouthed like ‘uhh??’ If she doesn’t return the feelings, she’ll probably be really embarrassed. Stuttering as she tries the ‘it’s not you, it’s me’. Unless it’s not someone she’s close with, in which case, she’d use their ‘crush’ to her advantage. If it’s someone she has a crush on as well, she’ll blush and look away. Be shy. You’d probably need to convince her to speak or look at you again cuz she’d be like ‘?! they like me? me???’

35. What is his/her favorite scent?

Desserts, rain, the outdoors (especially earthy scents).

36. If they had a Pokemon team, what PKMN would they have?

With ‘starter’: Serperior, Weavile, Houndoom, Phantump, Dragalge, Togetic.

Without ‘starter’: same team, replace Serperior with Kangaskhan.

37. Can s/he sing? act?

She can’t sing well but that won’t stop her when she has the urge. Obviously she can act, or she wouldn’t play people so well lol.

38. Can s/he swim?

Yep!

39. Does s/he drink? Do drugs? Smoke?

Yes she drinks, no she doesn’t do drugs (unless medicines in the d&d count? I don’t know what sort of drugs they have), no she doesn’t smoke.

40. Are they good with children?

Yeah actually! She wants kids to have a happy youth, unlike what she had, so she’s willing to do things to entertain and help kiddos. If a kid cons her, she’d try to even hunt them down purely to see if there’s any way she could help them.

41. What sort of atmosphere does s/he give off?

Depends. Either antisocial or exceptional flirt depending on what’s going on to the average person.

42. Do they believe in any form of afterlife?

Yeah, she thinks there’s an afterlife. What it entails, she doesn’t dare imagine.

43. What’s the first thing s/he does in the morning after waking?

Roll outta bed/sleeping bag and get dressed, think about getting something to drink asap.

44. Who would be his/her voice actor/ress?

Morrigan from Dragon Age, voiced by Claudia Black. Dragon Age: Inquisition seems the best bet, as Morrigan’s voice seems more controlled and less bubbly than Origins. Perhaps Origins though when she’s interacting with Sul?

45. How would you describe his/her aesthetic?

Clothing wise: revealing/sexy. Personal taste: nature, stars, anything that’s just lulling, tranquil, natural to the world...

46. How would s/he react to supernatural/paranormal phenomenons?

Willing to fight a ghost. Probably be spooked at first, but after the first encounter with these sort of creations, she’d probably be okay. Just that first time... “woah let’s punch this ghost” half damage “holy shit you can punch a ghost? Cool. Also magic time becuz wow that didn’t do shit”.

47. How would s/he confess their love to others?

Judging by conversations with Heather, she’d be hecka frustrated. What are feelings. I don’t know what this is. Why do I care about you so much please explain this to me? And once she figures out that it’s love she’s feeling... that explains the confusion, the butterflies in her stomach, the awkward shyness even she couldn’t explain when she reacted to them being nice but... I must now blush... and hide my face...

48. How do they react to being bored?

Time to unbored herself by doing something. Hunting, pestering others, flirting, gambling, anything but sitting there jiggin her leg if she can help it. Restlessness doesn’t fit her.

49. Have they ever been stung by a bee?

Yush.

50. If they had to pick a Disney Princess/Prince, which do they like? Which do they feel most alike? Which do they aspire to be most like?

Essie would probably really like Tiana for her go-getter attitude. She probably feels most like Rapunzel, locked away from the world and badly treated by her ‘caretaker(s)’ (the city she grew up in) but now she’s free and adventuring and seeking her own trues and fulfilling her curiosities. Who she’d probably most aspire to be I guess would be Moana (not qualified as a Disney princess yet, but admirable all the same. Moana went on an adventure, conquered it, found herself, defeated the big bad, etc) or Merida (they share like-characteristics, and Merida didn’t need a man to complete her, though family/friends it reveals are important).

21 Q’s for d&d Chars and OCS, taken from here

1. What influenced or inspired the creation of this character?

First d&d campaign. Kept getting stuck between a handful of races. Finally got down to 4, then 3, then 2. Had to wait and see if Ammy would approve Yuan-Ti Purebloods. Got approved. Suddenly whAM - inspiration. Didn’t want a flat typical ‘evil’ Yuan-Ti. Her background was helpfully inspired by the one I picked- Urchin. I just continued adding tragedy because I’m an asshole.

2. What is your character’s relationship with their family? Family is a word which here refers to biological relatives, close companions, and/or the individual(s) who raised them.

Essie’s only known family was her mother. She was very close with her, sadly, her mom passed when she was young, probably 3-4ish. She never knew her dad. Her relationship with chosen family is positive. Details on ‘chosen’ family will be thought up further later, as I’m confident she’ll come to consider her traveling companions like family.

3. Who is the closest person to them?

Her mum (deceased), and eventually probably Sul and the group. I feel she’ll particularly enjoy Cackle and Adela but we’ll see~

4. What were the conditions surrounding their formative years?

Harsh livin of survival all her life yo. Fighting for food, stealing to get by, learning how to use and deceive people to get things she needed and then eventually, things she wanted.

5. What creature would they like to have as a pet?

Snakes and doggos.

6. Do they have any bad habits?

Does stealing count? Lmao uh, other than that, maybe gambling a bit..

7. Is there anyone they’d die for? Kill for?

Old friends, later their dnd group obviously.

8. Who was their first love?

I’m gonna be cheesy here and say Sulhadur. Mostly because she never really knew what love was anymore until him. Whoops feels-

9. How would this character react to someone confessing their love for them?

^ See up there, I know I answered a question like this already.

10. How old is this character?

Twenty.

11. Are they normally peaceful or aggressive?

Peaceful probably- just leave her be and let her do what she gonna do.

12. How does this character handle stress?

Probably get frustrated. Pull on hair, get loud, vent and rant.

13. Does your character consider themselves lucky?

Hahahahaah- no.

14. What is their favorite holiday?

I... Honestly don’t know? If we’re going by holidays present now, probably Halloween or smth low-key based around family. As for d&d holidays, of those I found, she’d probably prefer Trolltide (a variation on Halloween), and either Feast of the Moon or Feast of the Ancestors.

15. What is the best gift they could receive?

Mom’s love. //bricked// Mom’s ring??? That seems about all at the moment...

16. If they could instantly kill one person in the world without consequence, who would it be?

Probably everyone in their childhood city whoops- or at least someone there that caused her tremendous pain.

17. If they were in possession of a trio of wishes, what would their three wishes be?

Mom to come back to life (probably rejected), happiness (rejected), money (rejected), new clothes, new items to help with spells, idk something to help the dnd group as a whole then.

18. What is their favorite spell or method of attack?

Unknown at the moment. I’ll probably say her Magic Missiles and Acid Splash.

19. What are their guilty pleasures?

Give her desserts!

20. What is something this character is or could be addicted to?

Happiness? Desserts. Yes happiness and desserts sounds about right.

21. Have you actually played this character yet? 

Just started! :D

25 Q’s for your d&d Chars and OCs, taken from here

1. What is this character’s alignment?

Chaotic Neutral

2. What is a notable quote from this character? Alternatively, what is their favorite quote?

No notable quotes yet, just started playing her. Favorite quote would probably be something like ‘only the strong survive’ or ‘a sheep in wolves clothing’.

3. Summarize your character’s backstory with no more than three sentences.

Small innocent snake-child is born to a snake-lady whom has no spouse. She’s raised by her loving mother until she passes away of illness. The remainder of her life has been an uphill battle for survival and equality.

4. Describe your character using a song title.

Snake Charmer. //bricked// oR What Doesn’t Kill You Makes You Stronger.

5. Are there any story arcs you would like this character to explore?

ALL

6. What would your character like (or have liked) to do with their life?

They’d like to find happiness. They’d have liked to have a better childhood filled with joy and happiness too, and a healthy mom, and to better herself.

7. Who is your character’s best friend?

Solace technically from her old group. We’ll see what happens in her new group!

8. Who is your character’s worst enemy?

Miz’ri from her old group thus far~

9. Who has, for better or worse, had the most impact on your character’s life?

Thus far, her mother and the people of her childhood city.

10. What is the most badass thing this character has done?

Nothing really yet? Other than survive. Maybe persuaded Lord Hardon- I mean Amon- to chill his nuts.

11. What crime is this character most likely to be convicted of?

Thievery obviously lmao. And being too cute.

12. What meme would you use to describe the character?

Hello Darkness My Old Friend, But That’s None Of My Business, Fuck That Shit I’m Out.

13. Does this character swear frequently?

Probs!

14.What is this character’s relationship with religion or the church?

Fuck that shit I’m out, no thanks!

15. Would this character ever make a deal with a devil or dark spirit?

Under the right circumstances, maybe. But doubtful cuz she ain’t that stupid. Usually. Probably. Unless dire circumstances.

16. Emotion or Logic?

Logic. What are emotion. Plz explain.

17. Soup or Salad?

Soup and stews!

18. What is the character’s favorite Pokémon?

Phantump :’I

19. What Pokémon Go team would they be on?

Team Valor.

20. Is your character currently in love? Is there anyone in love with your character?

No-yes. Eventually.

21. Do you ship your character with any other characters? (This includes characters from other universes and canons)

Sul and her are meant to be okay.....

22. How would this character seduce a lover?

OH GOD well- apparently with flirty, charm, good looks, lots of hip swaying, smooth talking, etc (and her high Persuasion stat) works in her favor. Sul it- it would just come naturally. Essie’s shy with him it’s precious. It’s because she loves him tho.

23. If your character could play any part in a drama, stage production, or musical, what part would they play?

Behind the scenes, probably something like a makeup artist. In a piece, she’d probably be an actress, and a more low-key role because plz don’t spotlight me the arts aren’t my thing...

24. What is your character’s favorite album?

WIP WIP WIP ?? No albums in d&d realm so??? questionable.

25. What does this character mean to you?

I love her she’s my new daughter duh.

[houseofvans]

Sketchy Behavior | Hellen Jo 

Never afraid to speak and/or draw her mind, Los Angeles based artist and illustrator, Hellen Jo and her characters can be described as rough, vulgar, tough, jaded, powerful, bratty and bad-ass - AKA her own brand of femininity. Known for her comic Jin & Jam, and her work as an illustrator and storyboard artist for shows such as Steven Universe and Regular Show, Hellen’s rebellious, and sometimes grotesque artwork and illustrations are redefining Asian American women and women of color in comics. In fact, that’s why Hellen Jo was a must-interviewee for our latest Sketchy Behavior where we talk to her about her love of comics and zines, her antiheroines, and redefining what Asian American women identity is or can be; and what her ultimate dream project realized would be.  

Tell folks a little about yourself.  So is it Helllen with three “l”’s? Mainly because your IG handle and website has a whole lot of extra “l”’s? 

Haha my actual name is Hellen with two L’s.  All my emails and urls contain a different number of L’s to confuse everyone. My grandfather took my American name from the Catholic saint, but he spelled it wrong, and now I share the same name as the mythological progenitor of the Greek people. But I like it better than my Korean name, which literally means, “graceful water lily” HAHAHA. I am an illustrator-slash-painter-slash-I-don’t-know-what living and working in Los Angeles.

Let’s talk about your early childhood / background. I read you’re from San Jose, CA and both your folks were professors, which is really cool!!   How did you end up making art instead of teaching a room full of students about Hotel Management or Medieval History? Just curious where you got your “creative bug” and what early comics, arts, and/or influences led you down the road to becoming an artist?

I grew up in South San Jose, and yes, both of my parents are professors, of finance and of applied linguistics.  A lot of my extended family are professors too, so I grew up parroting their desire for academia, but really, I started drawing when I was a wee babe, and I’ve always wanted to be a cartoonist. When I was really young, my parents drew for fun, really rarely; my dad could draw the shit out of fish and dogs, and my mom painted these really beautiful watercolor still lifes.  I was fascinated, and I’d spend all my time drawing on stacks and stacks of dot matrix paper by myself.  My parents also had a few art books around the house, and I remember staring so hard at a book of Modigliani nudes that my eyes burned holes through the pages.

What was the first comics you came across?

The first comics I ever got were translated mangas that were given to me by relatives when we’d visit Korea.  I remember getting Candy Candy, a flowery glittery shojo manga for girls, and I was mesmerized by all the sparkly romance and starry huge eyes.  I was also enthralled by Ranma ½, a gender bending teen manga that was equal parts cute art, cuss words, and shit too sexy for a kid my age.  However, I was mostly thrilled that I could understand the stories with really minimal Korean reading skills, thus cementing a forever love of comics.  In junior high and high school, I read a mix of newspaper strips and some limited manga, and I was enthralled with MTV cartoons “Daria” and “Aeon Flux”, but I wasn’t exposed to zines or graphic novels until I moved to Berkeley for college.

Did you have a first comic shop you haunted? What did you fill your comic art hunger with?

Being a super sheltered teen with not-great social skills, I was lonely my first semester, so I would lurk at Cody’s Books and Comic Relief every single day after classes.  I read the entirety of Xaime Hernandez’s Love & Rockets volume, The Death of Speedy one afternoon at Cody’s, and it literally made me high; I was so hooked.  I amassed some massive credit card debt buying and reading as many amazing comics as I could those first (and only) couple years of school: all of Los Bros Hernandez’s Love & Rockets, Dan Clowes’ Eightball, Julie Doucet’s Dirty Plotte comics, Peter Bagge’s Hate series, Chris Ware’s Jimmy Corrigan, Charles Burns’ Black Hole, Taiyo Matsumoto’s Black and White, Junji Ito’s Tomie and Uzumaki volumes… I could not believe the scope and breadth of the alternative comics genre, and the stories were so insanely good; they literally mesmerized me. I was so obsessed; I even skulked around the tiny comics section at UC Berkeley’s Moffitt Library in search of books I hadn’t read, and amid the fifty volumes of Doonesbury strips, some sick university librarian had included an early English translation of the Suehiro Maruo collection, Ultra Gash Inferno.  That book blew my tiny mind about a hundred times; it’s totally fucked up erotic-grotesque horror porn, but the art is unbelievably beautiful.  I read that entire thing sitting on the floor in the aisle, feverishly praying to God to forgive my sins after I finished the book, because I was way too ashamed to check it out of the library.

How about zines? I imagine a comic devouring ….

I devoured zines at a nearly equally fervent pace, including those by Aaron Cometbus, Al Burian (Burn Collector), Doris, John Pham, Jason Shiga, Lark Pien, Mimi Thi Nguyen, etc. I had never seen a zine before in my life, and suddenly, I was living in a town full of zinesters.  I was drowning in inspiration.  I tried to copy the art and writing of everything I read, and I spent a lot of my time making band flyers, trying to pass off zines as suitable replacements for term papers (this worked just once), and making monthly auto-bio comics for a few student publications. Eventually, I dropped out of school, then dropped out of school again, and I made my first published comic, Jin & Jam; then it all became real.

What was your early works like? and how did these become fodder for your self-published stuff later?  What about your own experiences did you feel needed to be expressed in your own comics and artwork?

As a kid I was mostly copying sparkly girl manga and Sailor Moon stickers, and I don’t think I’ve really strayed all that far from that. My first few zines were cutesy autobiographical comics about crushes and falling asleep at the library; incredibly dull stuff.  I made a super fun split comic/ep with this band I loved, The Clarendon Hills, but after that point, I was tired of drawing cute, goofy shit.

I had also really been obsessed with Korean ghost horror movies in high school, and I wanted to make comics that reflected more of that kind of coming-of-age violence and rage, so I made a couple standalone horror comics, Paralysis and Blister.  These were longer than anything I’d ever done (forty to fifty pages each), and I felt like I was finally figuring out how to write interesting stories.  I eventually dropped out of school and made Jin & Jam, based a bit on growing up in San Jose and on other kids I had grown up with. 

At the time, there were still relatively few Asian American women in comics, and I was tired of whatever hyper-cute, yellow-fever, Japanified shit we were being pigeon-holed into, so I reacted by writing and drawing vulgar girls who started fights and didn’t give a fuck.  I went to art school for a few semesters, got better at drawing people, and went on to draw nothing but mean bad girl ne'erdowells.  I’d never been a very strong or defiant personality outwardly, but I’ve always been a pretty big fuckin bitch on the inside, and I just wanted to draw how I feel, in the most sincere way possible. And naturally, over the years, as I continued to develop this attitude in my art, I was able to express it better in person as well.  Self-actualization through making comics!

For folks who don’t read comics, can you explain why they are SO AMAZING and moving to you!  What about the format, art and overall genre makes them so great and not just your typical “funnies.”

I truly believe that comics are the greatest narrative format and art medium of all time!  They are completely full of potential; you can draw and write whatever the hell you can think of, there are no real rules, and you as author and artist can create a deep and intimate experience for your reader.  You can bare your vulnerabilities or yell at the world or create a visual masterpiece or inform people, visually and narratively.  I don’t even believe that good art makes good comics; writing is king, and the art should really serve to further the story.  Some of the worst comics I’ve ever seen had the most amazing art, and some of the greatest comics I’ve loved have the plainest, most naive, even ugly visuals, but those authors were able to finesse a symbiotic relationship between the text and the images to tell a compelling story.  People are already so drawn to images, so it makes sense to me that they can enhance a reader’s literary experience so much.

I read that Taiyo Matsumoto is one of your all time inspirations.  Most folks probably don’t know much about this master of comics, heck my knowledge is limited, so what makes his work speak to you so much?  Perhaps it’ll encourage folks to venture into a new world of art exploration through visual comics.

Taiyo Matsumoto is the all time master of coming-of-age comics. I worship at his altar, for real. He is a Japanese artist, so technically his work is manga, but his masterful storytelling and singular visuals are so different from most manga, beyond categorization.  He writes quiet, powerful stories about boys, girls, and teens who live in uncaring worlds surrounded by unfeeling adults, but they rise to these challenges and thrive in spite of themselves.  The characters feel deeply, and the reader can’t help but ache and rage and celebrate just as fully. The drawings are beautiful and sensitive, with rough, loose artwork consisting of scratchy lines and cinematically composed shots.

What were some of your first memories with his work?  

I remember buying the first two Pulp volumes of Black and White (also published as Tekkonkinkreet) at Comic Relief, reading them both at home that day, and then, covered in tears, literally *running* back that evening to buy the last volume before the store closed.  I probably cried a dozen times while reading it; it’s a story about two orphan boys who protect each other in a neo-Vegas-like city of vice, but the characters were so brutal and brilliant and poignant.  I had never read anything like that before, and it literally made me sick that, at the time, none of his other works were available in English.  Eventually, I figured out that he was more widely published in Korea, so on every family trip, I’d run away from my folks for a day and buy as many of his books as I could carry back to the US. I made my way, slowly, through the Korean translations of Hana-otoko, Ping Pong (another incredible favorite!), and Zero. A beautiful collection of short stories, Blue Spring, was published in English, and then VIZ began translating the series No. 5, but they abruptly stopped mid-series due to low book sales.  I was so starved for his work that at that point, I’d ebay his art books and comics only available in Japanese and just stare at them. Eventually, Black and White was made into the anime film, Tekkonkinkreet, and Ping Pong was made into an anime mini-series, and his rise in popularity ensured a wider English availability of his work.  His current series, Sunny, is being translated and published here, and every volume breaks my heart a million times.  

I’m sorry, this just turned into a gushy, gross fan fest, but Matsumoto’s books really changed my entire perspective on how comics can be written and paced, how characters can be developed fully, and how important comics really are to me.  I love them so much!!!!!

You’ve worked in so many cool fields such as a storyboard artist and designer, and on various cartoons, such as Steven Universe.  For folks who are interested in those fields, what can you tell folks about that?  I’m sure like most artists, you’d rather be spending those long hours working on your own personal art, so how do you balance them? How did you move from a comic artist to working as a storyboarding artist?

I stopped working in animation about a year and a half ago, but the transition from indie comics to storyboarding was rough one, for me.  I got into storyboarding at a time when a lot of kids’ animation networks were starting to hire outside the pool of animation school graduates and reach into the scummy ponds of comics.  In my case, the creator of Regular Show, JG Quintel, had bought some of my comics at San Diego Comic-Con from my publisher, and he offered me a storyboard revisionist test.  

Some cartoonists, like my partner Calvin Wong, were able to transition wonderfully; cartoonists and board artists are both visual storytellers, and once they’d learn the ropes, many of them thrived and succeeded.  I can’t say the same for myself; I have major time management issues, I draw and write incredibly slowly, and going from working completely alone to pitching and revising stories with directors and showrunners was just a real shock to my system.  For most of my time at Cartoon Network and FOX ADHD, I wasn’t able to do much personal work, but I crammed it in where I could.  

Storyboarding also requires a lot of late nights and crazy work hours, to meet pitch deadlines and to rewrite and redraw large portions of your board. I just couldn’t deal. I lost a lot of weight, more of my hair fell out, and the extreme stress of the job put my undiagnosed diabetes into overdrive (stress makes your liver pump out sugar like crazy, look it up, people!)  I realized that this industry was not meant for lard lads like me, and when the opportunity came to stop, I did. I could never figure out the balance between my job and my personal work, and I finally chose the latter.  Now I’m trying to figure out the balance between making personal work and surviving, but I’ve yet to crack that nut either!

From your art I get a sense of rebellion and angst, how did this morph into an outlet through comics, cartoons, and illustration?  Some aspects of your work that are so cool is the fact that your characters are female and women of color and in a completely new way.  Asian characters definitely get stereotype in art and comics, so when did you consciously start to create these awesome antiheroines and redefine what Asian/Asian American women/girl identity is or can be?

A lot of the seething rage bubbling behind my eyes has been simmering there since childhood, and a very large portion of that anger comes directly from all the racism and sexism I’ve experienced as a child and adult. I’ve been treated patronizingly by boys and men who expect an Asian girl to be frail, demure, receptive, and soft-spoken. I’ve experienced yellow fever from dudes who are clearly more interested in my slanted eyes and sideways cunt than in whatever it is I have to say.  Even in comics and illustration, people constantly tell me I must be influenced by Japanese woodblock print (pray tell, where in the holy fuck does that come from???), or they’ll look at a painting I’ve done of a girl bleeding from her mouth and dismiss my work as “cute”.  I despise this complete lack of respect, for me and for Asian American women in general, and I’ve made it my life mission to depict my girls as I would prefer to be seen: fucking angry, violent, mean, dirty and gross, unapproachable, tough, jaded, ugly, powerful, and completely apathetic to you and your shit.  Any rebellion and angst in my work comes directly from my own anger, and in my opinion, it makes that shit way better.  Girls and women of color get so little respect in real life, so why not “be the change I want to see” in my drawings?  

I think I was always aware of this lack of respect, and the “othering” of Asian American women, but once I got to college and learned to put a name to the racism and xenophobia and sexism and fetishism that we experience, my heart burst into angry flames, and it exploded into all of my art.  I’ve never been able to hold that back, and I’m not interested in doing so, ever.

Talk about your process and mediums and process.  Are you a night owl or an early bird artist?  Do you have stacks of in-progress works or are you a one and down drawing person?  Do you jot down notes or are you a sketch book person.

I am a paper and pencil artist all the way; I do work digitally sometimes, to make gifs or to storyboard, but I hate drawing and coloring on the computer. I’m terrible at it!  I draw everything in pencil first, erasing a hundred thousand times along the way toward a good drawing. For my paintings, I’ll then ink with brush pen and paint with watercolor, all on coldpress Arches.  For comics, I ink with whatever, brush pen or fountain pen, or leave the pencil, usually on bristol board.  I’ve also been keeping sketchbooks more recently (never really maintained the habit before), where I like to doodle fountain pen and color with Copic markers.  In sketchbooks, I’ll slap post-its on mistakes, a trick I learned from paper storyboarding on Regular Show.

I am a total night owl and a hermit; I have to be really isolated to get anything done, but at the same time, being so alone makes me crave social interaction in quick, fiery bursts.  I’ll go on social rampages for a week at a time, and then jump back into my hidey hole and stay hidden for months, avoiding everyone.  It’s not a very productive or healthy way to be, but it’s how I’ve always been.

I have great difficulty trying to juggle multiple tasks; I tend to devote all my mental energy and focus into whatever I’m working on at the time, so I need to complete each piece before I can do anything else.  It’s an incredibly inefficient, time-wasting way of making art, but it’s also the only way I can produce drawings that I am satisfied with.

If we were to bust into your workspace or studio, what would we find? and what would you not want us to find?

You’d find an unshowered me, drawing in my underwear, which coincidentally is also what I do not want you to find!

You’d also find a room half made into workspace (more below), and half taken over by boxes of t-shirts and sweatshirts (I do all my own mailorder fulfillment, like an idiot!)  I also like to surround myself with junk I find inspiring, so the walls are covered in prints and originals by some of my favorite artists, a bookshelf along the back wall is filled with about a third of my favorite comics and books and zines, and every available non-work surface (including desk, wall shelves, and bulletin boards) are covered in vintage toys, dice, tchotchkes, bottles, lighters and folding knives, weird dolls and figurines, a variety of fake cigarettes (I have a collection…)

Work-space wise, I have two long desks placed along a wall; the left desk has my computer and Cintiq, as well as my ancient laptop. Underneath and to the side of this desk are my large-format Epson scanner, fancy-ass Epson giclee printer, and a Brother double-sided laser printer.  The right desk has a cutting mat, an adjustable drawing surface, and a hundred million pens and half my supplies/crafts hoard.  I have a giant guillotine paper cutter for zines underneath this desk.  I’ve got two closets filled with button making supplies, additional supplies/crafts hoard, and all kinds of watercolor paper, bristol paper, and mailing envelopes are crammed into every shelf, alcove, gap.  This room has five lamps because I need my eyes to burn when I’m working.  Also, everything is covered in stickers because I am obsessed with stickers.

What is something you’d like to see happen more often if at all in the contemporary art world?  How’s the LA art scene holding up? Whaddya think?

As an artist who adores comics, I have a deep affection for low-brow mediums getting high-art and high-literary respect.  Not that a comic needs to be shown in a gallery to be a valid art form, but I am so excited that comics that used to be considered fringe or underground are gaining traction as important works of art and literature.  I wish this upward trajectory would continue forever, until everyone understands the love I feel for comics, but who knows what the future holds: the New York Times just recently stopped publishing their Graphic Novel Best Seller lists, and I think it’s a damn shame.

The LA art scene is really interesting to me, because it embraces both hi and lo brow work so readily; fancy pants galleries that make catalogues and sell to art dealers have openings right alongside pop-art stores that sell zines and comics, and I enjoy having access to both.  I will say that I think LA galleries are a bit oversaturated with art shows devoted to television and pop culture fan art; yeah, I get that you loooooooove that crazy 70s cult classic sci-fi series and you want to draw Mulder and Scully and Boba Fett in sexual repose for the rest of your life, but I’m more excited about seeing new and original work from everyone. I know you have something to say, and I want to see it.

Mostly, I’d obviously love to see more women of color making art and making comics; we’ve come a long way since I started making zines in 2002, and there are some incredible WOC cartoonists making amazing work right now, but we need more more MORE!  

What would be your ultimate dream project?  What is something you haven’t tried and would love to give it a go at?  Dream collaborations?

My ultimate dream project is the Great American Graphic Novel, but I am so shit at finishing anything that I have not been able to even approach this terrifying prospect.  But I figure I have until the day of my death to make something, so … one step at a time?

As far as something I’ve never tried, I’ve been recently interested in site-specific installation; I’ve always been a drawer for print, confined to the desk, and I’m in awe of cartoonists and illustrators who have transitioned to other forms of visual media, whether it be video, sculpture, performance, whatever.  I know my personality tends toward repeating the same motions forever and ever, and I hope I can break out of that and make something really different and challenging for myself.  I also secretly want to make music but I am the shittiest guitarist ever so maybe it’s better for the world that I don’t!

The dreamiest collaboration I can think of is to illustrate a skate deck for any sick-ass teen girl or woman skater.  Seriously, if any board companies wanna make this happen, EMAIL ME

Give us your top 5 of your current favorite comic artists as well as your top 5 artists in general.

Top 5 Current Favorite Comic Artists:

1. Jonny Negron 2. Jillian Tamaki 3. Michael DeForge 4. Ines Estrada 5. Anna Haifisch

Top 5 Artists of All Time

1. Taiyo Matsumoto 2. Xaime Hernandez 3. David Shrigley 4. Julie Doucet 5. Daniel Clowes

What are your favorite style of VANS?  And how would you describe your own personal style?

My favorite VANS are the all-black Authentic Lo Pros, although I have a soft spot for my first pair of Cara Beth Burnsides in high school (they were so ugly and I never skated, but I loved them).  

My personal style can be described as aging colorblind tomboy who dresses herself in the dark; my favorite outfit is a black hoodie with black denim shorts and black socks and black sneakers.

What do you have planned for this 2017? New shows? New published works?

I’ve got two group shows with some of my favorite artists in the works; I’m so excited but I can’t share any details yet. I’ve also been writing a new comic, but don’t believe it til ya see it!

Best bit of advice and worse advice in regards to art?

Best Advice: Never be satisfied; always challenge yourself to make your art better than everything you’ve done previously.

Worst Advice: Make comics as a stepping stone towards getting a job in animation.  When people do this, you can smell the stink of insincerity a mile away.  Fuck you, comics are a beautiful medium, and every shitty asshole who does this, I hate your guts!

Follow Hellen Jo

Website: http://helllllen.org Shop: http://helllllen.bigcartel.com Instagram: @helllllenjjjjjo 

Images courtesy of the artist

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The ‘Casting Couch’ Euphemism Lets Us Pretend Hollywood’s All Right

New Post has been published on https://usnewsaggregator.com/arts-culture/the-casting-couch-euphemism-lets-us-pretend-hollywoods-all-right/

The ‘Casting Couch’ Euphemism Lets Us Pretend Hollywood’s All Right

The very phrase seems designed to prevent us from thinking too hard about what it means. Casting couch. It describes the setting instead of the act, the furniture instead of the sexual extortion and violence. It’s alliterative, a pair of plosives dancing off the tongue in tandem. The idea of the “couch” gives the whole institution a touch of domestic comfort. It’s hard to get enraged about something that sounds so cozy, so sweet.

For many years, we’ve preferred not to think too hard about what the casting couch actually means, save as a relic of Hollywood’s seamy past. In the wake of numerous allegations of sexual assault and harassment against prominent film executive Harvey Weinstein, news outlets are plastered with new accusations and old industry reports of lecherous producers. Many of these crimes ― Weinstein’s and otherwise ― were open secrets, or even reported on in mainstream outlets, for decades.

The source of our current surprise isn’t really new information; it’s how carefully we’ve protected ourselves from absorbing that information. Last week, Slate published an article diving into the history of reporting on the casting couch. Repeated exposes and individual reports of sexual assault, Slate found, did little to dislodge the perennial media framing of “the casting couch” as a fading myth.

At least in part, that’s thanks to the mythology of the casting couch, a polite, sanitized euphemism that obscures a host of ugly realities ― and has been doing so since the early days of Hollywood.

“It’s not an explicitly risque term. The word ‘casting’ and the word ‘couch’ are innocent terms,” Fred Shapiro, editor of the authoritative Yale Book of Quotations, told HuffPost. Despite its wholesome components, the phrase manages to be quite evocative. “It doesn’t, I think require a lot of explanation,” Shapiro said. “Particularly in entertainment circles, if the phenomenon was going on, people would probably understand what it meant right away.”

The exact origins of the casting couch remain somewhat murky, though it’s clear the phrase and the practice have been around for a very long time. In an etymological investigation at The Atlantic, Ben Zimmer found descriptions of the practice on Broadway during the early 20th century; powerful producer Lee Shubert was known to audition chorus girls in a private chamber containing a couch. As Hollywood’s film industry burgeoned, moguls including Darryl Zanuck, Harry Cohn and Louis B. Mayer were notorious for demanding sex from aspiring actresses. Zanuck and Cohn were also rumored to have actual couches installed in their offices for this express purpose. By the 1920s and ’30s, the phrase itself was circulating. Barry Popik found the term in a 1929 novel entitled Hangover: A Novel of Broadway Manners. A 1924 stag movie (an early pornographic film) called “The Casting Couch” may have predated that, though Zimmer points out that the title may have been bestowed later.

While sexual abuse of subordinate women by powerful men takes place in every industry, only entertainment fields benefit from the euphemism of “the casting couch.” By and large, we’ve settled on “sexual harassment,” though there are general euphemisms like “slept her way to the top.” Nothing can match “casting couch” for its glibness and ability to encapsulate an entire sector’s sexual misdeeds.

Simply the fact that Hollywood has its own special phrase for the phenomenon implies a meaningful distinction ― that casting couch antics are a separate issue from run-of-the-mill workplace harassment. It swathes the process in an aura of alien glamour. Sure, groping would seem inappropriate during an interview for a sales management position, but Hollywood, we understand, must operate by its own rules to allow for creative genius to work. Even casting isn’t just interviewing, but a mysterious alchemical process driven by intuition and inspiration.

Most of us want the film world to be different from the workplace mundanity we experience. We’ve bought into the fantasy element of Tinseltown, the home of “La La Land” and “A Star Is Born,” and we don’t want to give up the dream of a mythical place where a young woman can hop off a bus from the Midwest and become a star. Casting might be the most vital part of this Cinderella fantasy: It’s the magical step that transforms a girl with a dream into a starlet. And who wants to imagine that the fairy tale isn’t a lie, that Cinderella actually hates the prince but married him to become royalty?

The sharpest cruelty of the casting couch is that it preys on our fantasies of Hollywood, but also on our distrust of ambitious women. We thirst for that moment when an agent catches sight of us on the street and insists we have the “it” factor, but we feel nothing but disgust for women who grasp for fame. (See: the mass loathing directed at Anne Hathaway, an actress who seems to try a little too hard, and the conditional love of Jennifer Lawrence, predicated on her ability to appear natural and unstudied.) A casting couch conjures up both hope and judgment ― it’s the place where your wildest dreams might be realized, and also the place where an undeserving woman might purchase stardom with sex.

The sharpest cruelty of the casting couch is that it preys on our fantasies of Hollywood, but also on our distrust of ambitious women.

Despite the cultural stigma against using sex as currency, we’re quick to believe that actresses would willingly have sex for roles. There’s a long-standing slippage between our ideas of actresses and sex workers. Until the late 19th century, their careers were viewed with similar disdain. “Because they worked outside the home and occasionally emphasized their attractiveness and sexuality in performances,” wrote Noah Berlatsky in 2015, “actresses on the stage were also perceived to be disreputable, publicly available women—whether or not they actually sold sex for money.” The casting couch is deeply entangled with this idea, that actresses are sexual performers and that filmmakers must try out the goods in order to cast an actress who can make America (that is, straight American men) fall in love.

The link between sex work and acting shouldn’t matter, of course; sex workers and actresses do not forfeit, through their choice of profession, the right to turn down sex. But it provides a foothold for rationalization: She wanted it, she does it all the time, she asked for it, she deserved it. Our minds jump quickly from the idea of a female performer to the loaded assumption that she would be willing to do anything, especially for fame.

And yet, more often than not, the casting couch is also dismissed as a fiction. Perhaps it’s the quaint specificity of the metaphor, which conjures images of a cigar-chomping producer coaxing an ingenue onto a couch in his private office, offering a role in exchange for a blowjob, or perhaps it’s just because we’ve reflexively ignored evidence of its reality for so long. Regardless, the common assumption is that it’s not real. ”‘Casting Couch’: Fiction or Fact?” read a 1975 Variety headline found by Slate.

A 1995 book compiled by Michael Viner and Terrie Maxine Frankel, Tales From the Casting Couch, is a prime example of this flippant assumption. It’s a book of anecdotes from actors and industry people about casting experiences ― some traumatic, some funny, some frankly dull ― that largely uses the term for a transgressive laugh. When working on the book, wrote Frankel in the introduction, they heard criticism of the title from members of the Casting Society of America who believed it “perpetuates a Hollywood myth they have been saddled with since the first want-to-be’s stepped off the bus from Iowa and found themselves lured into unsavory situations with unfulfilled promises of stardom in exchange for sexual favors.” In this odd framing, it’s the poor casting agents who are victims of a smear by unscrupulous, weak-willed nobodies who don’t exist anyway.

“These seedy stories,” Frankel continues, “are rare.” (Given the torrential onslaught of allegations against Weinstein, this strains belief.) But in fact, Frankel and Viner hardly seem troubled by the idea of such “seedy stories.” An entire chapter of the book deals with anecdotes about inappropriate advances. The stories are presented without editorial comment, save for section headings like “Ready, Willing, and Wacky! Who says sex isn’t funny? The following titillating tales will arouse your libido, kick start your kundelini energy, and make you laugh.” The chapter is entitled, “SEX, SEX, SEX!” 

The casting couch, in popular imagination, perfectly blends “it never happens” with “of course it happens, and who cares” ― and either way it’s the victims who shoulder the burden. If women try to draw attention to the phenomenon on a broader scale, they’re naive to have fallen for a fiction. If newcomers to the industry are shocked by it, they’re naive not to have expected it. (“Welcome to Hollywood, sweetheart.”) If they fall victim, they’re both naive and greedy, dumb enough to ruin their reputations in the name of a shortcut to fame.

Hollywood schmucks like Zanuck, Cohn, and Mayer didn’t keep their antics secret. Biographies and film histories often make mention of their strings of “affairs” and, of course, their fondness for the casting couch. Mayer, noted The New York Times in 1984, was “notorious for his endeavors on the casting couch.” Zanuck was “famously ‘in conference’ with an endless succession of aspiring actresses between 4 and 4.30 every afternoon.” In 2010, the Daily Express called Cohn “one of the original kings of the casting couch.”

These are crimes hiding in plain sight, draped over with the discreet gauze of cliché. “Casting couch” sounds gentle; “he extorted sex from vulnerable women” does not. The difference is purely semantic, but it works. And it enabled us to ignore the words of the many women of Hollywood who weren’t silent ― for decades.  

A phrase may seem like a small thing, but it can be powerful. Euphemizing “keeps us from having to face what we’re up to,” Ralph Keyes, the author of Euphemania, told Time in 2011. “David Lloyd George — he was Prime Minister of Britain during World War I — once said that if we ever spoke plainly and clearly about what was going on on the battlefields, the public would demand that we bring an end to war.”

The reason euphemisms like “the casting couch” survive isn’t because of people like Weinstein and Zanuck. It’s because of the rest of us, people who want permission to gloss over the problem and claim, later, that we had no idea anything was wrong. Sure, we knew about enhanced interrogation techniques, but we’d never stand for torture. Seriously: One 2010 study found public support for “harsh interrogation,” but minimal support for specific techniques like electric shocks and waterboarding. No wonder the Bush administration scrambled to rename torture with bland phrases like enhanced interrogation: Like the lecherous kings of Hollywood, they just needed to offer the public a couple words that would give everyone permission to look away.

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[clausvonbohlen]

Travels with my Shaman.

I  wrote my last post in a café in Iquitos, in the Peruvian Amazon, back in January. At that time, I was shuttling between Iquitos on the weekends, and the jungle clearing (‘terreno’) where Otilia the shaman lives, during the week. The terreno is an hour by car outside Iquitos, and then a forty minute walk down a muddy trail through the jungle. The trail is hot and humid and the mosquitoes are aggressive, but the annoyance is compensated for by the occasional  butterfly with startlingly bright and metallic blue wings.

I had my own little hut (or ‘tambo’) at the terreno – a basic wooden structure without electricity or water, but sufficient. I was drinking ayahuasca twice a week, usually Tuesdays and Fridays, and fasting on those days. For the first few weeks, I would vomit aggressively –  mostly a mixture of ayahuasca and stomach acid. On a couple of occasions, this searing gunk went up my nose, and I was unable to shake off the smell, and lingering nausea, for the rest of the night.

I was obeying Otilia’s dietary restrictions: no sugar or salt, and very light, easily digestible food – mostly rice and fruit. Certainly no alcohol or caffeine. By the end of the week I was usually pretty hungry, so I would go to Iquitos to eat in the restaurants there, and also charge my electronic devices and write emails.

When I first arrived at the terreno, I was the only visitor, and the first ayahuasca ceremonies were just for me. The ceremonies always took place in the dark, in the space beneath the wooden stilts that supported  one of the larger huts. Otilia and I would both drink a cup of incredibly noxious and viscous ayahuasca, then we would wait for the effects to manifest themselves. After an hour or so, Otilia started to sing ‘ícaros’, beautiful and comforting spiritual songs that are halfway between hymns and lullabies. Towards the end of the ceremony, around midnight, she would sit next to me and conduct a sort of examination, placing her hands on my abdomen and chest. I had the impression that she had X-ray vision, partly mediated by touch. She would then pronounce a diagnosis and a remedy or prescription.

In my case, Otilia diagnosed poor liver function and intestinal parasites. The former corroborated what a Chinese acupuncturist had told me six months previously – a blockage in the energy meridian associated with the liver. Otilia did not phrase it quite like that, but she did point to the same organ. To treat this, she prescribed a daily infusion of ‘matapasto’, a type of Amazonian grass.

I was more surprised by the diagnosis of intestinal parasites. I know that these loom large in the Amazon, where people drink the river water, but I am a child of the hygienic West, why would I have parasites? However, it is certainly true that my digestion is unpredictable at best, and I frequently have a feeling of discomfort in the lower gut. Otilia said that I should go to a pharmacy in Iquitos and request a three day course of anti-parasitic medication.

I was sceptical of Otilia’s diagnoses, but I followed her prescriptions with an open mind. I have to say that, after a few weeks, I felt better than I have done for years, both physically and mentally. Of course, this could be due to any number of reasons – the restfulness of being in the jungle and disconnected from the stressful aspects of the modern world, or the effects of the ayahuasca itself (which contains both DMT and MAOIs), or Otilia’s prescriptions, or a combination of all of these, or even a placebo effect. But the fact is that I did feel better, a lot better, and my inclination is to believe that there is something behind her physical diagnoses.

I asked Otilia to explain to me how she arrived at her diagnoses, and how she knew which medicinal plants to prescribe. She knew that my interest was genuine, and that in fact my trip to the Amazon was partly driven by the urge to learn about these things. She was happy to answer my questions and to teach me, but she was often at her most talkative towards the end of a ceremony, when I was usually feeling exhausted and sick (although the nausea abated after the first couple of weeks). Nevertheless, I always struggled to remember what she had said, and in that state, in the dark, I was not up to writing anything down.

In summary, Otilia told me that she empties her mind of all thoughts, then she concentrates on the body of her patient, and her sense of touch will corroborate what her inner eye can see. She tried to teach me how to do this, but I was never able to empty my mind of thought. Otilia said that the ayahuasca was not in fact necessary for the healing work, and that in the years before she took ayahuasca for the first time (not until her late 20s), she trained her mind by focusing her inner vision on what was happening in closed rooms, or in places she could not physically see. She recommended that I start to train my mind in the same way. You may imagine how much success I have had.

As to her knowledge of medicinal plants and their preparation and use, I was expecting her to say that the spirits of the plants revealed their secrets to her through the medium of song, and through their unique vibrations; that is how Stephen Beyer describes it in his excellent and scholarly book, Singing to the Plants – A Guide to Mestizo Shamanism in the Upper Amazon. However, Otilia surprised me by saying that she has gained her knowledge by travelling widely throughout the Amazon in her 20s and 30s (she is now nearly 60) and speaking to other plant healers (‘vegetalistas’). There is no doubt that her knowledge is profound. I have heard her prescribe many different plants to patients, and whenever I spent time with her by day, she would try to teach me the names, uses, and means of preparation of the medicinal plants we happened to pass. I found the amount of information overwhelming, and impossible to remember.

After the first couple of weeks at the terreno, other visitors started to arrive, amongst them an American girl and a Mexican man, both of whom live in Singapore. They were not bad people, but they soon got on my nerves; unhappy people are rarely good company, and as a rule people do not seek healing in the jungle unless they are unhappy. Of course, there can be solace in sharing unhappiness – there is truth in the adage that misery loves company – but it is a bit of a balancing act: the unhappiness must be more or less equally apportioned, and both parties should be similarly honest. I rarely found that to be the case, and though it was never a major problem, it was another reason why I liked to get away to Iquitos on the weekends. There were plenty more unhappy foreigners in Iquitos – mostly American, heavily tattooed, and constantly smoking - but at least in Iquitos I was not obliged to spend time with them.

After a month with Otilia, I felt that I had drunk enough of her ayahuasca. It no longer made me sick, and I felt physically better than I had for a long time, but aside from the old Andean man who turned out to be a tree trunk (as I described in my last post), I never had any significant visions, and the plants were certainly not communicating directly with me in the way that I had hoped. I did feel that I had put certain things in order in my head: I had shaken off the lingering pain of a relationship that had ended a long time ago, and I had a sense that, rather than explore the world of plant hallucinogens, I needed to ground myself more securely in the world of consensual reality. Maybe that was the message that the plants had for me. Or maybe I needed to try a different kind of ayahuasca (since every shaman brews it somewhat differently).

                              *

In the summer of 2016, I had drunk ayahuasca with an Argentine shaman in the Scottish Highlands. This was a very positive experience that undermined many of my preconceptions. I have always suspected that decontextualized shamanism would be meaningless, or at best, just a way to escape from the present. It seems to me that the healing power of shamanism stems from its integrative function, the way that it can draw together disparate elements – physical health, spirituality, mythology, cosmology, etiology, nature, remembrance of ancestors, social norms and rituals – and thereby create an integrated matrix of meaning that gives participants a sense of groundedness and connectedness. But taken out of context, would that matrix still be meaningful?

That is a big question and one I do not intend to delve more deeply into right now. However, the week in Scotland was extremely positive owing to a very harmonious group dynamic, and this had a lot to do with the exceptional qualities of the officiating Argentine shaman, whom I shall call Che.

Che is in his early 40s. He drunk ayahuasca for the first time in his late teens. He had a vision in which an indigenous elder summoned him to come and study with him. The call was undeniable and Che set off to find the elder, who was a member of the Shipibo tribe in the Peruvian Amazon. Che spent the next 7 years with the Shipibo. Some of the shamans with whom he studied still had the tall, flat foreheads created by compressing their skulls between rectangles of balsa wood in infancy, as tribal custom used to dictate. Eventually Che was apprenticed to a master shaman in whose company, and beneath whose protection, he visited tribes that had avoided all contact with the modern world.

After seven years, the elders told Che that they had taught him all they could, and that the time had come for him to leave the jungle and to study the learning of the West. Che was resistant at first – he was happy where he was – but the elders insisted.

Eventually Che left the Amazon and made his way to Europe. He studied Ancient Greek in Bologna, then completed his PhD in Barcelona, comparing the pre-Socratic philosophy of Empedocles with the shamanic worldview. Che is reserved, graceful, humorous and inspiring; it is very rare to meet someone with such a deep insight into the phenomenon of shamanism from both a subjective, experiential perspective, and also from an analytical, academic one.

 Last summer, Che was living with his sister and a couple of friends on a houseboat near Tower Bridge. Once a week, he would give a talk on an aspect of shamanism or ethnobotany. There were never more than five or six attendees. A warm breeze blew through the boat as the shadows lengthened across the Thames, the hull rocked gently in its moorings, and Tower Bridge opened and closed to allow ships to pass underneath. They were whimsical, enchanted evenings.

At the end of November, I returned to the houseboat in order to pick Che’s brains for my upcoming trip to the Amazon. It was a cold, grey, windy afternoon; the houseboat was empty, damp and forlorn. The rocking made me feel seasick. Che was pale, tired and sick at heart. He had hoped that the houseboat would become a nexus for numerous projects: lectures on shamanism, courses on raw food cooking, projects in ecology and sustainability, and fund raising for reforestation activites. There were tie-ins with research being conducted by psychologists in Cataluña on the therapeutic value of ayahuasca, and also links with the globetrotting research vessel Heraclitus. But a number of backers had pulled out, and others had not honoured their commitments, and now the whole project was no longer viable.

 I told Che that I wanted to learn more about Amazonian shamanism, and that I was prepared to go to whatever lengths were necessary in order to do so. He replied that he had not been to the Amazon for over ten years, that he was afraid to go because so much that was once authentic has been lost, or diluted, or corrupted. The elders with whom he studied have all passed away in the last decade, and the last remaining pockets of authentic indigenous culture are far up the Río Negro. There are still tribes that have had minimal contact with the outside world, but that’s usually for a reason: they don’t want it.

However, he did know a Shipibo shaman who lived in San Francisco de Yarinacocha, a small Shipibo-Conibo community on the shores of lake Yarinacocha, near Pucallpa on the Ucayali river, about a week by boat from Iquitos. He told me the shaman’s name, Rodrigo. I should go there, ask for him, tell him that Che had sent me, and insist that I wanted to experience authentic Shipibo shamanism, nothing watered down or Westernized.

I wrote the directions in my notebook: Pucallpa, upriver from Iquitos, across lake Yarinacocha. No emails, no phone numbers… the way travel used to be. My notebook got soaked when a freak rainstorm inundated my tent in Mozambique, while I was out searching for rubies with my friend Winston; but although my handwriting bled into the surrounding paper, I was still able to decipher the directions.

                                       *

 Two months later, at the end of January, I told Otilia that I was planning to leave her terreno in order to take a boat to Pucallpa and seek out a Shipibo shaman called Rodrigo in San Francisco de Yarinacocha. I was afraid she might be offended that I wanted to drink ayahuasca with someone else, but she wasn’t. In fact, the following day she told me that she had had an important dream, and that she wished to accompany me on my journey. In 10 days her other visitors would have left, and she was keen to experience a Shipibo ceremony. It was years since she had tried any ayahuasca other than her own. And although she had lived in Pucallpa in her youth, she had never experienced the Shipibo curanderismo.

I was happy that Otilia wanted to accompany me. It would give me the opportunity to get to know her better and to find out more about her relationship with the spirit world, and I would feel more confident if she was with me. In exchange, I was more than happy to cover her expenses.

We booked our passage on one of the launches that chug their way up and down the Amazon, reminiscent of old Mississippi steam boats. The journey would take between 5 and 7 days, depending on how frequently we stopped to pick up other passengers, and also on the speed of the river. The ticket included 3 meals a day for every day of the trip, and cost 30 US dollars per person.

I knew that I was in for a slow trip, but even so, I was amazed by quite how slow. We went on board at the appointed time and hung up our hammocks in the central hall. Within an hour or two, there was barely room to move: hammocks covered every available inch, and the whole space looked like a hatching ground for human chrysalises. There were children running around everywhere; they travel for free, so the boat is popular with families. In addition, there were peculiar Amazonian pets on board, tied to their owners’ luggage with bits of twine. But though there were many passengers, there was little cargo. We had to wait 24 hours for a number of huge containers to arrive and be loaded onto the deck. Only then were the moorings finally cast off.

                         peculiar Amazonian pets

                       Otilia the shaman, and the author

One of the pleasures of this form of travel is that, over 7 days, you get to meet people. I was the only foreigner on board, and most of the Peruvian men looked like the tattooed Mexican convicts in Hollywood prison dramas. Thankfully they were more friendly, although Otilia warned me about the ‘human rats’ on board, and we never left our luggage unguarded.

In the mornings, the children on the boat gathered around the central dining table to sing songs and hymns, taught to them by the wife of a Peruvian missionary. I met her and her husband later; they were both very outgoing, but I was wary of the conversation turning to religion. I am not a Christian (or, rather, not only and not primarily), and it strikes me as farcical that Christian missionaries are still setting out to ‘civilize’ the indigenous inhabitants of the Amazon. It is true that there used to be frequent raids and counter-raids among Amazon tribes, but at the same time these communities – at least, those untainted by Western influence - perceive the sacred nature of all of creation. The spirit world is alive for them, and it is part of the fabric of daily life. They possess a sensitivity that Westerners have, for the most part, lost; or, if not entirely lost, then relegated to a dusty church service once a week. In my eyes, the indigenous inhabitants of the Amazon are much closer to God than the vast majority of missionaries who have set out to convert them.

Eventually the missionary and his wife did broach this subject with me, and I gave them my honest opinion. To my surprise, they were not at all dismissive, and even tentatively agreed. Then they asked me whether I would be willing to teach English to the children on the boat. For the remaining six days, after the hymn singing, I gave an English lesson to a ragtag group of children aged between 7 and 10. I have not taught this age  before, but their immense enthusiasm, and the astonishing quality of their memory, made it pretty easy. Later in the day, when I went walking around the boat, I often found myself being hugged around the legs by affectionate pupils. Their open-heartedness – described by Otilia in more erudite terms as the absence of ‘complejos’ - was deeply touching.

When I wasn’t sleeping, or teaching, or reading in my hammock, I sat on the roof of the helm and watched as the front of the launch divided the sluggish brown water ahead of us. The thickly forested banks of the river slid languidly by. We passed occasional villages, usually with children splashing around in the shallows. When the boat stopped, there was an invasion of women and children selling jungle fruits and vegetables, though thankfully none of the roasted insects, larvae and crocodile meat I had seen in the market in Iquitos. Nevertheless, after a week on the boat, I was happy finally to reach Pucallpa.

                         The crowded interior.

                              Bbq’ed larvae.  

                           Other treats.  

Otilia had spent her twenties and early thirties in Pucallpa. She left when the political situation in Peru became too hairy - when there was a nightly curfew in the city and running battles in the streets between the military and Abimael Guzmán’s Shining Path guerrillas. But she had been something of a community leader in Pucallpa, and a champion of women’s rights. It had been a small town back then, a hotchpotch of dirt roads and tin-roofed shacks. She hadn’t been back since she fled the violence, almost 30 years ago.

Otilia was excited about this trip down memory lane, but it was a lane she barely recognised. She wanted to show me the house where she first lived, and also the statue of a powerful female revolutionary that she had found deeply inspiring at a time when she lacked confidence. It took us a long time to find either, and although they were both still standing, the surroundings had changed beyond her recognition: there were smart asphalt roads, streetlights, malls, and blocks of swanky apartments. Unlike Iquitos, it is possible to reach Pucallpa by road from Lima, and consequently there has been much more development.

In order to reach the Shipibo community in San Francisco, we had to take a wooden canoe with a small outboard motor over lake Yarinacocha. On the way we saw pink dolphins breaking the water’s surface – they are creatures that loom large in indigenous Amazonian mythology: after dusk, they are thought to have the ability to transform themselves into handsome fishermen and seduce unwary girls by the water’s edge.

Otilia pointed out a large water tower, some distance back from the lake. She told me that when she was living in Pucallpa, some fishermen had found a mermaid trapped in their nets. They carried her up to the water tower and imprisoned her there, thinking that they could keep her alive while they made a deal to sell her to some Western research institute. However, and perhaps unsurprisingly, she did not survive for long in the water tower, though according to local belief, her corpse was eventually sent to Harvard (I have not been able to find any evidence of this).

                                *

 After an hour or so, the canoe nosed its way onto the mud bank of the village of San Francisco de Yarinacocha. Che had suggested that I go to the village and just ask for Rodrigo the shaman. We stopped at the stall of a talkative fat lady who was selling fruit juice beneath the shade of a large tree. We drank juice, then I asked if she knew Rodrigo. She did, and she pointed us in the direction of his house.

San Francisco is a small village of dirt roads, but not entirely untouched by tourism. There is a tiny museum, and children are constantly coming up to ask if they can sing a Shipibo song in exchange for a peso. As we approached Rodrigo’s house, I felt my shoe slide on the dirt road. Looking down, I saw the sole’s profile neatly smeared across a large and pestilent dog turd.

We were met by a girl who worked for Rodrigo. She told us that he was away in Pucallpa for the day. He had already performed ceremonies the previous two nights, but if we wanted, he would certainly do one with us that night. Otilia and I were both surprised. I said that we had really just come to make a plan with him, we hadn’t intended to spend the night, and we didn’t want to tire him out by making him do ceremonies on consecutive nights. The girl replied that Rodrigo would not be tired, he was ‘un gran maestro’, but we should wait a couple of hours until he returned, and make our arrangements with him.

I cleaned my shoe and we made ourselves comfortable in the hammocks of an open-sided hut. There were other huts on his plot, and a large and new-ish ‘maloca’ (a circular ceremonial building) at the back. His was certainly the most impressive dwelling of those that we had seen on our walk through the village.

A tattooed, chain-smoking foreigner soon appeared, topless, and started dancing around the garden with weights attached to chains – the kind of thing that is impressive when the weights are balls of flame, but rather tiresome otherwise, though possibly quite fun to do. This man came to speak to us later – he was a French Canadian hairdresser, very gothic, with a tattoo of the bones of his neck and throat superimposed on the skin of his neck and throat. But for all that, he was open and likeable, and told me that he was living on Rodrigo’s plot and drinking ayahuasca in order to try to cure the AIDS that was killing him.

It was now getting late and I was beginning to worry that there would not be any more boats going back across the lake. We were just getting ready to leave when Rodrigo arrived. He was powerfully built, probably in his late forties or early fifties. I told him why we had come - that the Argentine shaman Che had spoken very highly of him, and that Otilia and I were both keen to experience the authentic curanderismo of the Shipibo-Conibo. No problem, said Rodrigo, smiling. We could stay and do a ceremony that night. I said that he must be tired, having done two ceremonies on previous nights. Rubbish, he replied. He was un gran maestro and could do a ceremony every night if he needed to. But I said that we had to make arrangements with our hotel in Pucallpa, and we would come back the following afternoon.

                              *

 It rained heavily during the night and we had to squelch through the mud on our way back to Rodrigo’s plot. We were shown our places in the maloca – the mattresses on which we would sit during the ceremony, and also where we would sleep.

There were a couple of hours to kill until the ceremony was due to begin. I went outside to familiarise myself with the geography, and to make sure that I wouldn’t get lost trying to find a toilet in the dark. I met an Irishman whose bug-eyed stare disconcerted me. He kept telling me what a great shaman Rodrigo was. As soon as I could, I escaped back to the maloca.

One by one, the long-term paying guests began to filter in – mostly white, mostly female. They were chatty and cheerful. Rodrigo came in and started to prepare his altar and ceremonial objects, consisting mostly of hundreds of potent (and revolting) mapacho cigarettes. After a while he came over to speak to me and Otilia. Up until this point, he had not asked us any questions, and neither she nor I had mentioned that she was a curandera. Rodrigo ignored me, not even asking me whether I was taking anti-depressants (in which case, drinking ayahuasca can be dangerous). However, he was very interested in Otilia, and he interviewed her extensively about her own healing and shamanic practice. He went on to tell us, at considerable length, how many plants he had dieted, and how much time he had spent alone in the jungle, learning his craft.

When the exchange was over, Rodrigo returned to his spot and chatted to the other participants. The conversation took place across the maloca; it was mostly about money and exchange rates, and about how much he had earned by speculating on currencies some years back. While he was holding forth about his financial acumen, everyone started preparing their tobacco pipes. When Rodrigo started to smoke his pipe, so did they. Clouds of acrid smoke rose up to the roof and there was almost constant spitting. When the pipes started to go out, people lay back. The chatter died down as, one by one, they appeared to fall asleep.

Eventually Rodrigo poured out the measures of ayahuasca. In some cases, people needed to be woken up to drink their cup. I found it less disgusting than Otilia’s brew, which usually also contains tobacco as an emetic. One girl drank her cup and followed it up with a swig from a wine bottle, though I don’t know for sure that it actually contained wine.  Then we lay back in the dark and waited.

After half an hour, Rodrigo started to sing some Shipibo ícaros. They were not nearly as impressive and haunting as those that Che had sung during the ceremonies in the Scottish Highlands; Che’s had been a musical distillation of jungle sounds – croaking frogs, trilling birds, hissing snakes and roaring jaguars. Rodrigo’s ícaros, on the other hand, were meandering and repetitive. He soon appeared to tire, or get bored, and then his son took over.

I felt tired during the ceremony. From time to time, Rodrigo would sing another ícaro; at one point, Otilia sung some of her ícaros, with which I had become very familiar over the past month. I was happy to hear them again. They were different to the Shipibo songs – more melodic and gentler.

I did not feel sick, and the dose was not particularly strong, although there was plenty of vomiting going on around me. Once again, my visions were minimal. The only clear one I had was seeing myself being enfolded in the strong, protective blue tentacles of a huge octopus. That is really all I can remember.     

                             *

 Otilia and I woke early the following morning. The sun was filtering through the wooden slats of the maloca. A few others were still asleep on their mattresses on the floor, but most had returned to their own huts.

Rodrigo came in and asked us how we had liked the ceremony. We made polite, appreciative noises. I paid him for the night, 200 soles per person ($60). He suggested to Otilia that she should work for him, and that he would send some of his clients to her in Iquitos. She thanked him noncommittally.

As Otilia and I walked back through the village, she asked me what I had thought of the ceremony. Not much, I said. The conversation about money was odd. The ícaros were disappointing. Rodrigo appeared tired, or just disinterested.

That was brujería, said Otilia. Witchcraft. Rodrigo is a rich and powerful man in the village. He is using his relationship with the spirit world to manipulate people for his own ends. He has managed to cast his spell over his clients. He uses humour, and some degree of personal charm, to hold them in thrall. But he is exploiting them, not curing them. He is a sorcerer.

Personally, I am not so sure. But it might explain my vision of the octopus’ tentacles. I had perhaps sensed that Otilia was protecting me, and that was how my subconscious had visualized it.

And that, continued Otilia, was why she had started to sing her own ícaros during the ceremony. She had tried to counteract Rodrigo’s malevolent magic. But she didn’t like this kind of work. It has very little to do with the serious work of healing.

                                *

 We returned to Pucallpa and booked our onward journey to Lima, by bus, for the following day. I suggested a visit to the cinema in the afternoon, a multiscreen complex in the big new mall. Otilia has rarely been to the cinema, although she has referred to ayahuasca as ‘the cinema of the jungle’, because of the lifelike and narrative visions she has.

The cinema was on the first floor of the mall. Otilia hesitated when she saw the escalator. She looked around and spotted a staircase by the emergency exit.

      ‘I’m going to walk up,’ she said.

      ‘Ok, I’ll see you at the top.’

I couldn’t help smiling to myself as I stood on the escalator. Less than 24 hours ago, Otilia had been doing battle in another dimension with a black magician, like Gandalf and Saruman fighting each other in the ‘Lord of the Rings’. But confronted with a mechanistic modern invention, she had lost her nerve.

I met her at the top of the fire escape.

      ‘Are you afraid of escalators?’ I goaded her.

      ‘Yes,’ she replied, wide-eyed and childlike for a moment.

 Again I had to smile.

 ‘You see,’ she continued, ‘when I was a small girl, my father took us to Lima to see the planes take off and land at the airport. The airport was new then. I saw an escalator for the first time. A very beautiful lady with very long hair stepped onto it. The lace of her shoe got stuck, so she bent down to free it. As she did so, her hair fell forwards, and that got stuck too. Her face was pulled closer and closer to the metal step, and when she got to the top, a large clump of hair was torn out of her head. I will always remember the way she screamed.’

                             *

I bought us tickets for ‘A Dog’s Purpose’, a saccharine but charming feel-good film about the successive lives of a pet dog. The shaman enjoyed it a lot, as did I.

[georgecunninghamillustration]

Contacts with Industry

Recently, I have contacted a multiple different artists/illustrators asking them a few questions. Here are the questions I asked the talented, fine artist and illustrator, Caitlin Hackett (Go check out her work beautiful here).

Have you always wanted to work in the creative industries and now you are, have you ever experienced any struggles causing you to re-think your approach to it? Do you have any advice you wish you had known when starting off?

C- I spent most of my life as a young adult planning on going to college to study wildlife biology. Although I have been drawing and painting for all of my life, I never really thought of being an Artist as a career path. It was not until I attended a pre-college program for Fine Art at CalArts in southern California as a junior in highschool that I started to consider a career in the arts as a viable path. Even when applying for colleges I applied to a mixture of schools for science and schools for art. I wound up deciding to study Fine Art at Pratt Institute in NYC, partially just for the adventure of it if I'm being honest. I didn't know much about what it took to be a professional artist, or even what it meant to create Art under such constant pressure. It was a tough learning curve and I did consider dropping out or changing majors from Fine Art to one of the Communications Design majors offered after my freshman year. I wound up sticking with it though, I saw a show of Walton Ford's paintings at the Brooklyn Museum that changed my whole perspective on what it meant to be an artist and what constituted "real art". I don't think I had any real idea until my senior year at Pratt though just what it meant to live as a full time Artist. The huge pressure of having to constantly create, the struggle of having to market yourself and brand your work, and to work as the sole proprietor of your own small business. It's not easy being your own boss and having to deal with all of the difficulties of managing clients and gallery relationships on your own, it was a steep learning curve for me after graduating with my BFA. As an introvert it was particularly difficult to learn how to deal with clients, write contracts and grants, and put myself out there to meet with gallerists. Much of being a professional artist is simply office work, sending emails, writing contracts, keeping a schedule, etc. It's not quite as romantic as it's made out to be in popular culture haha, but it is rewarding to be able to create the work you're passionate about for a living.

Did you find that you have developed your own style over time and do you think this style has been created on the foundations on what influences you as a person and a practitioner?

C- I've always been interested in animals, wildlife biology, fairy tales and mythology, so the style of my work flowed naturally from those interests. I collected illustrated fairy tale books as a child, as well as encyclopedias of animals and bones, so much of my style comes from copying from those illustrated tomes and scientific illustrations as a kid. I also grew up in rural northern California, hiking and camping in the ancient redwood forests and swimming in the cold Pacific ocean, so I loved to draw from the nature around me.

Do you ever struggle with finding time to create personal work just for your own enjoyment? 

C- This is certainly one of my biggest struggles as a professional artist, there is rarely enough time in a day or a week to create all of the work that I am hired to do for commissions, as well as completing my gallery work, let alone to create my own personal work. I don't often have time to explore new mediums or play around with new concepts because I am so busy trying to finish my client work and pay the bills! It's so important to set aside time to make personal work, I tend to get really burned out otherwise and then I can't create at all.  It's an on going issue for me in my scheduling, trying to make the time to do new passion projects. 

As a student I get given briefs and in some cases I find I have a lack of interest and I don’t find these briefs exciting, they feel like a chore I don’t want to do. How would you get around this issue and make the brief more interesting and exciting for yourself. From my experience it drains your creativity when you're not enjoying the work and have to force it out. 

C- As a professional artist and illustrator this is still a problem I have, many of the projects I am hired to do I am simply not that interested in or inspired by, but I find that if I do enough research into the subject matter I can usually find some element of it that interests me, be it in the history of the story I'm illustrating, or playing around with the color palette, or simply studying books of symbolism from art history to find interesting tidbits from historical allegory or mythology to create a deeper story from the imagery I'm being hired to paint. It's not easy, and it can burn you out, but it is a central part of being a full time Artist. It's relevant to your last questions as well, I think the most important thing you can do to counteract the creative burn out of working on a project that does not interest you is to balance out your time to make work just for yourself.

I always struggle with composition and colour palettes, if this ever happens to you, how do you approach this issue? Any advice/tips? Do you have a working method that helps with this issue?

C- I do alot of initial sketches to help with composition, playing around with the large forms and shapes on scraps of paper first always helps me. They tend to be really quick, rough graphite sketches, just using the essential shapes of the objects destined for the final painting, but it's very useful. I like to make at least 2-5 of these quick layout sketches first, before laying anything down on the actual piece, so that I can get idea of my options. The color palette is one of my favorite things to do, I love playing with colors, and switching between warm and cool palettes for different pieces. I often lay down a base tone on my page before I even start sketching, a blue or a green, a warm grey or burnt umber, depending on the mood I want the piece to have in the end. I find starting with an initial tone is very helpful to determine the direction you want the palette to go.

A big thanks to Caitlin for taking the time to respond. Go check out her work! https://caitlinhackett.carbonmade.com