#i used to resent them for it for personal and political reasons

[nohkalikai]

can't help but think of how my parents never taught me their languages because to them, being secular and westernised is ideal. it's not like they want me to be completely divorced from their respective communities. they just don't see them as important to my life? it's like an unimportant side quest that stays on ur menu for months because it seems insignificant and the rewards (in their minds) are paltry.

[13eyond13]

.

[evangelifloss]

Thinking about a certain scene in Dungeon Meshi that completely encapsulates the Autistic experience of making friends as an adult and how hard it is to try and navigate it without ending up getting hurt.

Like IDK about y'all, but this is a common problem ALOT of Autistic Adults face when trying to make friends with other people, because unlike children who aren't good at keeping their opinions to themselves, Adults ARE. In society, we're even encouraged to "keep the peace" "be polite" and etc, which commonly leads to awful scenarios as shown above when Laois finds out his buddy has come to resent who Laois is without actually telling him. All too often the friends that we love to hang out with, people that we're so happy to spend time with, don't feel the same way and in many cases, come to blame us for our social cues or lack thereof.

And when/if we do eventually find out how our friend feels, Dungeon Meshi hits us with another painful panel of how that usually ends up playing out.

It's hard for Adults with Autism to make friends, and even harder to maintain them because alot of the ways Neurotypicals tell other Neurotypicals that they don't like a certain behavior is by quietly disengaging. Whether that involves having one sentence answers, going quiet, or having a certain tone in their voice, all those things signal annoyance or disapproval, but for the Neurodivergents, those subtle cues are completely missed.

And yet when we inevitably discover we DID do something, it is natural to ask "well why didn't you tell me?" because in our minds, it should've been the next step in the equation. However for the Neurotypicals, that's NOT something to bring up. Its important to be SUBTLE about the issue at hand and rely on signals to tell the other person. Blame is placed on us for not noticing the "obvious" signs of disapproval rather than the idea of talking it out as such things are uncomfortable and harder to do. Alot of the time what ends up happening is resentment due to the idea that it was "obvious" and the fact one didn't notice indicates a deliberate ignorance rather than a complete unawareness. It ends up calling into question our quality as a person and our sincerity. We get called "fake" or "malicious" or even "stupid" for failing social cues rather than questioning the decision to be indirect and vague.

For a manga about exploring the dungeon, it seems that the artist would rather explore very real and prevalent dynamics in society with the adventuring premise as a backdrop. I felt VERY seen in these panels, and many others, because it happens so suddenly and dare I say it, plainly. There's no dramatic build-up or spectacle made and in essence, it just Happens.

I think that's what makes the scene hit even harder. It seemingly comes out of nowhere for Laois, like how it always comes out of nowhere for alot of people, and it's never a dramatic twist either. It's always mundane and hurtful. A sudden unforeseen bump in the road that ends up calling into question one's entire friendship with someone and consequent other friendships. It asks "what if other friends feel the same. What if the people that I really like actually hate me and I don't know it?" Or at least that's what I came away with after reading the chapter. I've been where Laois was and the only reason I'm not there now is because I lost the naivete I had and doubt everyone else's sincerity.

[charmwasjess]

Still thinking about Galidraan, about the Legends vs Canon treatment of Dooku’s character, namely his exit from the Jedi. 

It’s funny how much it matters to me and improves Dooku’s story that he didn’t leave the Jedi out of growing disillusionment with the Order itself. In the current canon, it’s all framed around a very Padme-esque disenchantment with current political makeup of the Republic, the Jedi being used by the Senate and political machines inappropriately, and how planets with little wealth or influence are left out. In the penultimate moment of crisis, he leaves for Serenno, not because he can’t be a Jedi any longer. Because of a conviction that he could truly make something better. 

And I don’t mean to suggest that he never expresses any criticism of the Jedi or particularly, the Council. He seems to have founded that characteristic trait within the Disaster Lineage. (Ironically, the person in Dooku’s story who should have the most legitimate reason to have a personal problem with the Jedi Order is fucking Sifo-Dyas, who never seems to have considered leaving and literally dies telling the camera he did it all to save the Jedi, but that’s a different post.) But that isn't what compels Dooku to leave. In fact, he remains close with the Order for years afterward.

Why it matters to me is because that detail makes Dooku ultimately betraying the Order SO MUCH MORE FUCKED. 

Because they weren’t an old score he was settling. It wasn't seething resentment that boiled out into revenge years later. They were innocent collateral damage of his decisions. His family. His lineage. His legacy. It makes his treachery so much more personal. He had a wager, power for a horrible cost, and he took the power and paid the horrible cost. Sidious really gets him with:

If Dooku hated them and had always thought they deserved to be destroyed, it wouldn’t have been a true Sith bargain, the trade off wouldn’t have tallied. In the same way that Vader could not have existed if Anakin hadn’t loved Padme and yet still killed her.

If Dooku was just a horrible, conceited, power-hungry ass who expectedly traded the kinda shitty people in his life for a shot at more power, it wouldn’t be a very good story. If he really didn’t give a shit, why would Sidious make that his initiation? But if he does - does care deeply about Sifo-Dyas, does love Qui-Gon like a son, is touched by Yaddle’s kindness and sympathy, begins to see Asajj as a true apprentice, consistently tries to save Obi-Wan out of affection, still considers the Jedi his true family - and yet still dooms them all, how much more tragic and horrible and sickening and real and interesting is his story?

[rosemarie333]

Astro Observations/Opinions (Tropical Edition Part Three 🌎)

Hello! Thank you for the support of my previous posts! I love all the comments and questions🫶🏾

These are based on my perspective of placements and signs, so take what resonates and leave what doesn’t🫶🏾 I’d love to hear y’all’s take as well!

Now let’s get started 😝

1. If you ever meet someone with nice and long healthy hair THEY prob have a great sun placement or have leo placements (could also have a good mars placement as well). gets compliments on their hair and it’s super big as well😋😩

2. Malefic or Harsh planets in the 3rd house (mars, saturn, chiron, lilith, and pluto) speak your truth because no matter what you can’t always please others and you shouldn’t hold your truth close to your heart because you deserve to share it to the world. Chappell Roan has both moon and pluto in the 3rd house and all homegirl said was “please stop harassing me and my family” and people were acting like she said something politically incorrect lol. Buttttt your words do have a lot of power😗

3. Sag mars are the type to push your buttons and then leave the scene when you explode LMAO idk but some sag placements be saying anything for a reaction at times like😀😀

4. Venus in the 12th 🫱🏻‍🫲🏿 not seeing your beauty even tho y’all be the baddest in the room 🥺 12th house really makes the perception of themselves seem very foggy I’ve heard

5. Libra placements or venus dominance🫱🏻‍🫲🏿 having a fat ass, Cancer placements or moon dominance 🫱🏻‍🫲🏿 being voluptuous like aphrodite, sag placements or jupiter dominance 🫱🏻‍🫲🏿 having the thickest thighs ever lol watch out if you get kicked by a sag there the centaur for a reason (legs be strong asf LMAO) *having the planets in your first house too gives that vibe

6. Lilith in the 1st house, 10th house, and 11th house 🫱🏻‍🫲🏿 getting talked about wherever you go and provoking people for NO reason

7. having 6th house placements 🫱🏻‍🫲🏿 loving fitness (capricorn’s are that way as well)

8. fixed dominance 🫱🏻‍🫲🏿 taking years to get over a situation (yes even aquarius placements), mutable dominance 🫱🏻‍🫲🏿 taking a day to get over a situation LMAO

9. neptune, pluto, venus or mercury in the 5th house people YALL ARE SO FUCKING creative, if y’all ain’t using your creativity and instead are replacing it with more logical ideas it can be draining because of how creativity is such a great outlet for yall. i recommend doing anything out of the box because when doing so it keeps the fire ignited in you guys🫶🏾 (12th house placements are creative asf too imo) even you guys with saturn or chiron, y’all don’t suck at being creative, you guys need to be around people and situations that invoke it out of you and learn how to get better using and being creative with time (per saturn)

10. Venus in pisces people, venus aspecting neptune, neptune in the 5th or 7th can really imagine the person they like to be someone there not. neptune can really fogg you guys perception of the person which allows so much resentment and anger later on because once the rose colored glasses is off y’all are like 😀 and it’s a completely diff person then who you thought they were. take your time, be patient but work on seeing people for who they are rather than what YOU want them to be (bc it hurts y’all in the long run and I DONT WANNA SEE MY PISCES HURT) and y’all intuition about y’all’s partners be ON POINT TOO if you listen to it🫶🏾

11. leo and scorpios are so much more similar than they think lol. they both esp when in the lower energy can operate off of ego and both can have a “me me me” type energy. scorpios really can hold onto resentment and past pain which then they can turn into fuck everyone else and then focus on THEY want which can hurt others in the process🥺, but leo’s do the same in a way that they are prideful and doesn’t want to admit that they aren’t the best at times. they both have a me vs the world attitude imo😭 but both in a chart? POWERFUL PERSON 😝

12. libra rising are all over the place at times and i wonder why (having every planet in their sisters sign house 😭😭😭 if there was a debilitated rising it would be in libra LMAO)

13. Saturn, Mars, Lilith, Pluto, or Chiron in the 11th🫱🏻‍🫲🏿 being constantly betrayed and bullied by friend groups and or being seen as an outcast for no reason 😭

14. Scorpio risings (pluto in the 1st or pluto aspecting your ascendant) please get a hold of your staring problem because i guarantee you one glance you give someone for longer than 5 seconds they feel y’all laser stare LMAO (no scorpio rising cant get away with their stare IMO)

15. Aquarius risings i’m so jealous YALL can look good in any fucking thing😩😩😩😩 like y’all can walk out with a trash bag dress and i’m not kidding everyone would be like 📸📸📸

Thank you for reading! 🫶🏾

[sonik-kun]

Reminder that canon Jiang Cheng is:

- Self-sacrificing. There have been numerous examples in the book where JC is willing to lay down his life for his family and sect without a second thought. Charging at Wen Chao and Wen Zhuliu in the turtle cave. Stepping in front of his mother to protect her from the core melter hand. Distracting the Wen before they discovered WWX. Offering himself as a hostage in return for JL in the Guanyin Temple incident, etc.

- Fiercely protective of his family. The above bullet point elaborates on this part well. But I would also like to add that he is extremely protective of JL. He follows him on nighthunts and is the first person JL calls for whenever he is in trouble. The moment JL sends out a flare, JC is instantly in there, dropping everything for him.

- He allows JL to be a child. Despite the historic context and the stiff upper lip attitudes of that time period, JC allows JL to be a child still. He is spoilt rotten and never knew the same horrors those of his previous generation had to endure. JC does all he can to keep him safe from that to prevent similar incidents from happening again. He also allows JL to healthily express his emotions and never once scolds him for crying. The moment he sees him upset, he's in there soothing him, ready to throw hands with whoever hurt him.

- He doesn't use corporal punishment methods on JL despite it being the norm of that society. JL explains this to WWX who was shocked to discover that JC doesn't punish JL, despite his threats. JL is horrified by the notion and is very comfortable and secure around his uncle. Secure enough to give him sass even, something JC would never dreamed of doing to his elders.

- He is an excellent and attentive leader. He built his sect from the ground up and recruited people on his own all whilst he was still a teenager, still recovering from trauma and torture. He brought his sect back from the brink of annihilation and built it back up as a major sect on very minimal experience with little next to no guidance.

- He's politically savvy. From a young age, he was always socially aware of everything, valuing the safety of his sect and family above everything else. He correctly predicted WWX's downfall and tried so much to warn him and save him from it. Powerless in that moment, he chose his sect over WWX in fear of them being annihilated a second time should he side with him. WWX understood and respected this, so defected of his own accord.

- He still believed in WWX and held onto hope for him, even when things were looking bleak. Despite WWX siding with the Wen, the sect that almost annilihated his own, JC allowed WWX to go with them and remained friends up until WWX inadvertently got JZX and JYL killed. He still allowed WWX to see his sister and even name his nephew. They visited each other in secret regularly despite the risks of being caught, and JC tried to defend him even in the face of the three most strongest sects. He wasn't successful, but he tried.

- He is more reasonable and level-headed than the rumours lead you to believe. We see this when the prostitute comes to testify about JGY. He calmly considers her word and everything she has to say. Not once was he rude or snappy with her. He also remembers his etiquette and addresses elders with manners and respect. He may at times be quick to anger, but he is also quick to calm himself down and conduct himself properly as we see in his first scene where he lets "MXY" go, despite being a practicing demonic cultivator.

- He let's WWX go in the end. The moment he learns the truth about everything and that WWX wasn't entirely guilty for everything everyone accused him of, JC drops all feelings of aminosoty towards him. He doesn't blame him, nor does he actively pursue him anymore and demand he answers for his "crimes." JC got all the answers he wanted from him and instead of holding on to grudges and resentment, he let WWX go to be happy with LWJ, despite clearly wanting him to come back to Lotus Pier. He understands and respects that WWX is ready to move on and start a new life with LWJ. It hurts him, but he respects that decision.

There are many more positive traits I could discuss here, but I'll be here all day if I did.

JC is a nuanced character with a lot of flaws, but he also has a lot of positives that make his character realistic and relatable but also very likeable. He is a traumatised man with a troubled past, but he never allowed it to truly bring him down. He persevered, built up his sect, and raised a nephew with a pure heart. I think it's safe to say that despite his problems and despite everything he has gone through, JC is a survivor with a strong heart. He has a lot of admirable traits that you mustn't ignore or deny if you truly wish to enjoy and appreciate his character.

[anneapocalypse]

On the role of outsiders.

One thing I think makes the Scions' relationship with Wuk Lamat unique isn't that they're mentoring her--I don't really see it as a mentor relationship and for various reasons I think it's better for it not to be that--but that, as outsiders, she finds that she can show vulnerability with them that she's only rarely been able to show with anyone else.

When we meet Wuk Lamat in 6.55, it's pretty heavily telegraphed that she's posturing a lot to cover up some personal weaknesses or insecurities. This made me really curious about her, who she was and what that overconfident demeanor was covering for. And when I got into Dawntrail and started getting to know her, I wasn't disappointed.

(No Wuk Lamat hate on this post, please. Any responses clearly trying to pick a fight will be removed and blocked without reply.)

Wuk Lamat has a couple of foils in this story, but a big one is Sphene, and I love @unmovingtroika's description of Sphene as "unpersoned to an extreme degree." And as a distorted mirror of our main character, Sphene reminds us that any person in a position of authority or heroism is depersonalized to some degree, no matter how down-to-earth or benevolent.

Gulool Ja Ja is really presented to us as very much a people's ruler, the charismatic blessed siblings who united the peoples of Tural through curiosity and open-mindedness and understanding. And that may be largely true, but it's also made of him a myth, a legend inscribed in stone and memory. Meanwhile in the course of Dawntrail's story we also meet the real person Gulool Ja Ja... at least, the one who's left. The man who has spent three years grieving his brother, his ever-present companion, the Reason to his Resolve, a man who for the sake of political stability has had to hide his grief and loneliness from even his own children, as he does his best to carry out the work they had begun together, and complete the Rite of Succession in his brother's absence. And if there are places where Gulool Ja Ja failed to foresee the potential negative outcomes to the Rite, like Bakool Ja Ja's actions endangering his people, we might see there in hindsight the Head of Reason's absence in the final stages of the Rite's preparation. And we see, in some of Zoraal Ja's anger and resentment and insecurity, a glimpse of the ways in which the people's Dawnservant might have failed his own son.

One of Wuk Lamat's early growth moments is when the Scions convince her that she doesn't need to try and hide her obvious seasickness--an affliction she can't help, and which represents no failure of character on her part but which is, well, embarrassing. I love that she seems to particularly connect with Alisaie, who's had her own experiences of feeling inadequate next to her sibling, and feeling the need to prove herself on her own terms.

Could Wuk Lamat have been convinced to drop the act by her allies if they weren't outsiders? The problem is that everyone else in Tural, even her own siblings, are the people she'll have authority over if she wins. Erenville frequently rolls his eyes at his old friend's posturing, and fairly so, but Wuk Lamat doesn't behave that way just because she's insecure. In the same way that her father has had to conceal the death of his brother even from his own children, Wuk Lamat recognizes the danger of showing weakness before the people she will have to rule--especially when she's already aware of her reputation as being less qualified than her brothers. But these outsiders from Eorzea are different. They're allies who will never be her subjects. In private moments, she can be a person with them. She can be vulnerable. She can be Lamaty'í.

(Incidentally, I think this is also why I found Sphene calling her Lamaty'i so unsettling. Initially it seems like a simple misunderstanding, an outsider mistaking a very personal nickname for someone's "public" name. But in the hindsight of what we learn about Sphene, I think it feels a lot worse. Sphene is, consciously or unconsciously, pushing past the walls of formality and reticence that necessarily exist around a ruler when interacting with most people--nevermind a foreign head of state whose intentions are unknown. She's positioning herself as a friend when she is not.)

As the story progresses, we learn the Wuk Lamat and Koana have always been close. Now, in the Rite of Succession, they must treat one another as rivals and can no longer share confidences--at least, at first. Koana's love and protectiveness of his sister emerges with a vengeance when Wuk Lamat is in danger--and I'd venture a guess that he, too, feels safer showing this sudden vulnerability before his allies and those of his sister, because again, they will never be his subjects. While we get only briefer glimpses of Koana's journey with Thancred and Urianger, I'd guess that their friendship has affected him in similar ways.

One of the benefits of blessed siblings is that they are never alone. They bring two perspectives to any situation, but they also have one another to confide in, to understand, to commiserate over the burdens of leadership in a way they can't with anyone else, not even family. Wuk Lamat and Koana taking on the role of Dawnservant together brings the benefit of their very different strengths and perspectives to their people. But it also means that neither must take on those burdens alone. When their allies depart, they will still have one another. There will always be someone at their side with whom they can just be a person.

The tragedy of Zoraal Ja is that he's evidently never had that kind of relationship with anyone. The myth of his seemingly miraculous birth has depersonalized him from the very start. All his life, he has carried the burden of living up to the expectations of the Resilient Son, and has never enjoyed the close relationship his brother and sister have with one another. To the very last, he attempts to live up to the legend alone--and he fails.

One of the biggest themes throughout Final Fantasy XIV is standing together. There is strength in companionship and cooperation, but for that strength to flourish, there must also be trust and vulnerability. Wuk Lamat and Koana ultimately find that in one another, as siblings and co-rulers, but the Scions play the important role of offering them an outsider's friendship in their journeys when they are cut off from one another, and would otherwise be alone. As Ketenramm and Galuf Baldesion once were to Gulool Ja Ja, the Scions to Wuk Lamat and Koana are neither mentors nor subjects, but companions and friends.

[ilycosy]

❝ DO YOU MIND ? ❞ | LUKE CASTELLAN

pairing : luke castellan x child of calliope!reader

summary — being the child of the mother of all muses, you're used to affections. boys and girls flock to you like you're a sweet, lovely thing, but they soon drop it when they realize that you're nothing like a muse. what happens if the camps precious, golden boy starts talking to you?

warnings : reader is a little toxic under their politeness, reader is also described to be feminine but there's no specific prns! luke is also kind of obsessive? he wants reader so bad.. not proofread (that's for babies /j)

aﾉn — i haven't written in a long time so bare with me, nor have i written for the pjo fandom ever (though ive been in it for a while..) this is also vv self indulgent (daughter of calliope here <3) so sorry if this isn't relatable ♡ lowercase intentional :)

being the child of the mother of muses has always been annoying— you've never had a break to just be. whether it be people chasing after you, or people who envy the attention you attract. there was always something, which you resented extremely.

if people were asked about you, they'd have only good things to say. you're beautiful, lovely, polite; but not a muse. it sometimes got annoying that it mattered so much to people, having others constantly talk about how you were never romantic.

you seemed to be uncomfortable with it at the very least, very few felt the resentment you held for love. those few could never confirm it though, having you reassure them that you're just a private person. ("there's no need for grand things, dear. i love you without such things." you'd say, through gritted teeth.) which is what might have drew luke castellan to you.

he saw through the politeness, observing you almost ever since you got claimed. he can picture when you got claimed, your embarrassed smile when an apollo girl had written a song for you. publicly performing it, you had lit up; literally. you were fifteen then— nothings changed in these past years.

luke can't remember all the times you've been confessed to, having songs, poems, even paintings done of you for your affection. but he can remember all the times he watched your facade crack; the way your smile stretched too wide to be real, your eyes dimming when you realized it was just another confession, or how you seemed to never interact with aphrodite boys anymore.

he finds it amusing mostly, how could such a pretty thing resent something people would kill for? either way, he finds himself being drawn in like you're a siren. the way your eyes darken at the mention of your mother, how you reapply gloss whenever you're nervous— he could go on really.

"are you going to eat that?" he finds himself asking you before he can stop himself, pointing at the yogurt bowl right next to your plate. he has half a mind to make sure he doesn't clam up when you look up at him, fluttering your lashes.

you gently push the bowl towards him, continuing on your morning like the best swordsman in the camp isn't talking to you. he pauses for a moment, licking his lips as he thinks of a reason to prolong this conversation.

fate seems to be on his side though— his brother, chris, being to busy talking to clarisse to even glance his way. he sits down, looking across from you as he eats the yogurt. he almost forgets that staring is rude.

"do you mind?" you ask, raising an eyebrow at him as you take a bite out of your crossiant. somewhat annoyed by the curly haired boy, your leg bounces steadily. "do i mind what?" he asks, like he's stupid— for some reason, you can't help but let your annoyance take over.

"why are you here," you start, pointing at the empty table. void of friends, you always sit alone until somebody claims they're in love with you. "you usually sit with your brothers and annabeth."

he shrugs at your questioning, not being able to find it in himself to hold back a teasing remark. "you know where i usually sit?" he asks with a small small, but the glint in his eyes show a certain smugness that gets under your skin.

you smile back at him, stretched too far and there's a bite in your voice hidden under honeyed words. "bye castellan," you croon sweetly. "hope you find your way back to your seat!" is all you give him, a morsel of fake attention that sends him reeling.

the next day, you wake up a bit later than normal. rising from your bunk around nine means you've missed breakfast, a deep feeling of anger surges through your core in a flash before you stretch and get dressed for the day.

when you leave the hermes cabin, you're stopped by a familiar figure. tall, brown hair, and a stupid smug grin. "hey angel," luke almost sings with how pleased he sounds with himself. "i have a presant!"

he reveals a crossiant and cold coffee, the faint warmth of the once fresh crossiant eases the deep feeling in your core even more though the coffee makes you want to vomit. "i don't like coffee." you state, taking a bite of the baked good. "but thank you, castellan."

he barely has time to respond with a you're welcome or an im sorry before you're smiling, too wide for his liking, and walking away. he debates following you, trying to talk to you like he's desperate for a friend. but he decides against it, wondering how to keep a conversation going with somebody that hates being sought after.

a week passes of the same routine— luke catching you at odd moments during the day, offering you little things to keep you around for a moment longer. you find it annoying, but keep a pleasant attitude anyways, it certainly helps that he's not bad to look at.

a small rumor spreads through camp, luke castellan having a crush. it barely takes the day for people to speculate that it's you.

it almost disappoints you, not having expected the camps favorite to fall so easily— doesn't he have any other girls? you debate on telling him that you're not open for relationships right now, having been in so many already, you could very easily blame any one of your exes.

but you don't have the chance to reject him the next time you see him because he's talking already, smiling at you like you'd fall so easily. "do you wanna help plan an activity with me?" he asks, offering you a delicious smelling tea.

"why would you want me to do that?" you question him, almost allowing yourself to have a genuine lazy smile but you just force a docile confused tilt. you sip on the tea, the once tart raspberries are now sweet in the tea mixing with a hibiscus flavor.

you're too busy drinking to notice him begin talking, he's mid laugh when you tune in. "— maybe you could help with setting up the theater?" he suggests, you pretend like you know how you got into a full conversation with him by subtly trying to exit it.

"why not have the apollo counselor help?" you say sweetly, setting the tea down and turning your full attention onto him. he feels sick to his stomach at how you look at him, soft features with a sugared tone. your eyes look at him like he's below you, like he's a nuisance, and for some reason that might be his favorite part.

he searches your face for a moment, glancing at your cold eyes before he chuckles. "maybe i want to spend time with you," he smiles like a cat, curling on his face with a pride that shouldn't make you as heated as it does. "i think you want to spend time with me too, yeah?"

you almost roll your eyes at his suggestion, but unable to squeeze out of this one without being mean, you agree to help him.

it only takes a couple weeks to fix up the theater due to the lack of counselors wanting to help, so it's safe for the younger kids to have a play— after that, it's back to the apollo children to plan. you sit back on the stage floor, sipping on a water bottle as you bask in the cold dusk breeze. "do you mind?"

a voice speaks from behind you, rasping slightly. you don't even have to look to know who it is, "no, castellan." you say, because you can't think of a reason for why you would mind.

luke sits himself down next to you, his knee brushing yours as he looks down at your water with a stare that could only be described at halfway pathetic and endearing. "here," you say, handing him the bottle. "i don't need you to die of dehydration on me."

he takes it gratefully, drinking it almost empty in three big gulps that make you roll your eyes with a small scoff. "did you just scoff?" he questions, an odd excitement in his voice.

you quickly try to deny it, hands coming up to animate how you didn't scoff or anything of the sort. but he already has a grin like he's drunk of the noise, "you definitely scoffed! that was so funny," he says with a loud laugh that makes you shush him, afraid of other campers hearing.

"i don't know why you hide that." he mumbles on your hand, fighting the temptation to lick it so you release him. those thoughts subside when your pretty eyes look up at him in confusion, "your annoyance." he clarifies.

"im not annoyed," you say, a bit defensively as you pull your hand away from him. "bit rude of you to say that, castellan."

he rolls his eyes in response, one of his arms coming behind you to rest on the stage. you can feel the ghost of it barely grazing you, "you're definitely annoyed," he says matter-of-factly. "you're almost always annoyed, or angry."

you fight back a scoff, but then give up. rolling your eyes you turn to him, searching his face for how he noticed, why he's doing this— but you come up with nothing. "why do you care?" you almost snap at him, drumming your fingers on your knee.

"i don't," he says like it's obvious. "im the same way." there's a beat after he says it, a silence that seems more comfortable than awkward like it should be. admitting his anger to you felt like a breath of fresh air, because he knew you'd understand him.

you bite your bottom lip, turning to face him. "that hatred," you start, almost in disbelief that you finally have the opportunity to talk about this. "it doesn't go away huh?" the question is phrased more like a statement, barely asking for confirmation.

he nods, not speaking as he watches you. there was no need for an explanation on what the hatred was, he knew as soon as you began talking. the gift from your mother was never really a gift to you, a burden of what it means to be a demigod is all it was.

you never knew what was genuine, or what was your mothers doing. but you felt a sense of ease with the hermes boy, nothing like all your previous relationships. "do you think it's bad," you mumble, almost ashamed.

"do you think it's bad that we feel this way?"

your question is softly spoken, genuinely interested in his opinion. he feels himself almost feel guilty for you, but he can't lie. "no," he wraps an arm around your waist. gently bringing you closer. "i think we might be the only ones in the right."

he says it with such confidence, a lack of guilt or unease in his voice that it makes you smile. not a sweet one, but a prideful one. one that could reflect the pride of a god, finally validation for the deep seated resentment that almost quenches that thirst for revenge.

minutes of silence pass by, the sun fully set as you lean your head on his shoulder. inhaling the pine and deep smell of his cologne, you hum. "are the rumors 'round camp true?" you ask.

he feels a small blush creep up his neck and ears, spreading across his face as he realizes that you heard about those. he never meant for his half-brothers to over hear a private conversation (said private conversation was in the bathroom, luke washing his hands while chris talked loudly about how he could get clarisse to go on a double date if he'd just ask you out already.)

"uh," he laughs awkwardly, his fingers drumming on the soft skin of your waist. "do you mind?"

you can't help the small smile that spreads across your face, "no." is all you need to say before his wet lips are on yours. hungry and desperate for your attention, which you give him without another thought.

[takerfoxx]

Personally, I feel that the reason Suletta and Miorine work so well as a couple is the same reason why they didn't work for me at first: they're just such fundamentally different people, with total opposite personalities, upbringings, values, desires, needs, strengths, weaknesses, traumas, the list goes on. If it weren't for the very strange set of circumstances that forced them to form a connection, I honestly doubt that they would even be friends, so much so that for the first few episodes, I found myself feeling weirdly disconnected from their relationship, and even found myself wondering if they even liked each other.

I mean, take a look at Suletta. She's a country girl from Mercury's mining colonies who never had any friends of her own growing up. She's a clone created in part to replace her older sister, in part to usher in her mother's plan to free her sister, and in part to be a weapon of revenge, leading to an extremely bizarre relationship with her mother that is equal parts affectionate and neglectful. She loves being around people, but is so socially anxious that any sort of interactions sends her into a stuttering fit. She's terrified of confrontation, and yet is larger and stronger than most, and put her behind the controls of a mech, and she will turn you into mincemeat. She's a total klutz when it comes to dealing with other people, and yet stays cool in a crisis and isn't phased by dead bodies. She trusts with her whole heart, measures her relationships by the value she gives to other people, blames herself whenever others let her down, can and will take a life without flinching to protect those close to her, and is delighted by something so simple as having others laugh at a joke that she made.

Now, take Miorine. A rich girl from an extremely powerful family, she lost her mother, quite possibly the only person to ever show her genuine kindness when she was a child, was "raised" by her contemptuous and neglectful excuse for a father, and grew to resent everyone and everything around her. She hates being around people, but has the confidence and social knowledge to play the game. She's tiny and physically weak, but also angry and assertive. She openly loathes her father and will insult him to his face, but also desperately craves his approval. She's been used as a commodity her entire life by people who see her as a stepping stone into power, and is bound and determined to make everyone who tries damned to a living hell. She was raised in luxury in space, but dreams of running away to what is essentially a refugee camp of a planet. She wants so badly to be allowed to stand on her own two feet and be respected for her own accomplishments, but has no real idea how to do it. She views relationships as transactions, has exactly zero patience for other people's nonsense, can and will sacrifice her own happiness for the sake of the select few that she cares about, will run headlong into the most harrowing of political battles, but also fall apart completely when confronted with the reality of death.

And, like I said, for whatever reason I just didn't feel the sparks between them at first. Their whole relationship just felt like a mutually beneficial arrangement, like it was said to be.

But then we got to that magical episode, where they had that amazingly written misunderstanding in the greenhouse, followed by that incredible argument on the space station, and I realized that this was the plan all along, and Suletta and Miorine are actually perfect as a couple...once they've managed to bridge the gap between their extremely different life experiences and massive communication issues.

See, what's so great about them is that while they are extremely different, those difference are also perfectly compatible. One's strength is the other's weakness, and together they make each other better. In a way, they're less opposites and more of two halves of one complete whole. It was Miorine's confidence that allowed Suletta to start standing up for herself, to learn confidence and make real friends, to figure out what love is. And it was Suletta's bravery that inspired Miorine to find a way to make something of her own, to seek out ways to use their families' legacies to help people instead of hurt them, to bridge gaps long carved out by blood. And in the end, they were two desperately lonely girls who just wanted someone to truly, honestly, and unconditionally love them, and they found it in each other.

Granted, it was rough going for a bit. Like I said, they had such different ways of seeing the world, they didn't communicate in the same way, they didn't see relationships in the same way, and they ended up hurting each other just trying to do what they thought was best. But they also forgave one another. They strove to better understand one another. And they came to realize just how much they needed each other. And though it took even greater loss and pain in order to achieve it, they finally found their happy ending. They found each other.

[dominadespina]

THE SINS OF DESPINA HATUN

Since the 14th century, one woman has haunted the history of the Ottoman Empire and the very minds of their historians with her influence over a Sultan who suffered a hummiliating fate.

The only wife of a Sultan who has been the target of curses; Despina Hatun. 

The reason for this great hatred of her has to do with the fact that she was influential and remain christian throughout her marriage. She was able to maitain the first and main place in the harem of her husband and to make him like her. A likeness that overtime grew into love and devotion. 

Her wishes did not remain mere wishes, and for this reason the muslim associates of Sultan Yildirim Bayezid Han, as well as later Turksih historians resented her. Today most people remember her as “Bayezid’s great love”. 

To Ottoman sources she was a fatal woman who lured their Sultan into sin. It can be concluded from that amount of hatred that she was allowed privileges and more power than was allowed for a foreign wife of a Sultan, or an imperial wife in general.

SHE MADE THE SULTAN FALL FOR HER

"As for Yıldırım, let's say that he fell in love with the princess." - Necdet Sakaoğlu. Bu Mülkün Kadın Sultanları, pg 83

"Throughout his life he was devoted to Despina, and his brother-in-law Stephen in turn was a devoted and steadfast friend." - Herbert Gibbons. The Foundation of the Ottoman Empire

According to Chalkokondyles, when Bayazit's favorite wife, Lazareva [daughter], whom he took everywhere with him into battle, was captured and handed over to Tamerlane, he ordered that wine be served to him there, in front of her husband. The enraged Bayazit told Tamerlane that what he was doing was not worthy of his father and mother. - Две српске султаније : Оливера Лазаревић (1373-1444), Мара Бранковић (1418-1487), pg 107

"When the latter's wife, the daughter of Lazar, whom he loved more than any of the others, had been taken away, and Timur was taking her around in the camp with him, he made her pour his wine in front of Bayezid, her husband." - Laonikos Chalkokondyles

"He kept her close – she accompanied him everywhere - he appeared unable to part from her. She was the one person, who influenced him most and was of course blamed by the Ottoman chroniclers for the fall of Beyazid’s empire into the hands of Timur. They considered the young sultan totally captivated by her."- Anna Buxton. The European Sultanas of the Ottoman Empire

It is widely understood that throughout their marriage Despina and Bayezid shared a devoted sentiment-perhaps more on his part-despite the circumstances that brought them together. The couple had similar interests such as politics, wine, partying, European customs, conversations and according to historians found constant erotic pleasure with each other. Though all of these cited interests might just be Ottoman historians attempts to depict this woman as deceitful.

" The sexually robust woman – she satisfies all his desires- but remains a Christian." - Richard Franz Kreutel performs a service to Ottoman polemic.

It is said that for some days, Bayezid remained in Despina's chamber and completely forgot about state affairs.

Olivera (Despina Hatun) is accused by Ottoman historians of using her charms and beauty to lure Bayezid to her. This seems highly untrue as Bayezid's harem is labeled as being filled with "forbidden beauties." He could have set his sight on another with more charm and beauty, and in fact he did, but still remained devoted to Despina.

It seems they use her beauty and political influence only as a means to label her as a Femme Fatale who is cunning, power-hungry and worst even, an infidel. Yet, when we look at foreign sources about the personality of Despina Hatun, she is describe as being gentle and flowery.

SHE WAS ALLOWED POLITICAL INFLUENCE

According to Dr. Zeljko Fajfric in his work "Srpske kraljice i princeze," released in 2007, no sultana before Olivera, who did not convert to Islam, managed to become so influential.

Yet something that is enough to critize him on is that he only puts this influence of hers to be due to her charms and beauty, yet again unintentionally labeling her as a femme fatale.

If beauty was all it took to have political influence, dozens more like her would have succeeded in that aspect, but she remains the only wife of Bayezid who had significant importance on politics.

Either Bayezid often sought after her opinion in matters of state or he took her as an advisor which might be the reason she was often with him, but no, a good scent, a soft spoken voice, long hair or enchanting glances will work, at least not for very long, even for a man prone to pleasure like Bayezi, and as we know Despina's political influence grew more with time than it decline.

A few things that are attributed to her council...

I: She helped accelerate the transfer of Prince Lazar's body back to Serbia.

II: She freed and paid ransoms for enslaved christians with the help of her brother; Stefan.

SHE BROUGHT DEBAUCHERY TO THE OTTOMAN COURT

Despina is often blamed for having introduced wine at the Ottoman court.

This sin that Bayezid's partook in can not be credited to Despina because he was already throwing such feasting assemblies ever since his princehood. Him and Despina married in 1390, he was well too familiar with wine and pleasure prior to their marriage.

Despina, later on, might have organized such festivities for him.

" Wine and kebab assembly was established. The infidel's daughter came and toasted Ali Pasha. The lady said, see the moment." - Aşıkpaşazade.

Still it is highly unlikely that Despina, who comes from a culture where married women do not speak in the presence of men would even partake in such assemblies filled with drunk men.

What is more likely is that she organized her own wine assemblies in the harem, with the presence of other women, but the chances of her doing such a thing as drinking in the presence of men is highly unlikely.

She might have even brought wine and so called debauchery to the once "pious" court of the harem, but as for the men; who take up the majority parties in politics and war, they were already familiar with the beverage.

[baggebythesea]

What do you consider a rare ship in SPOP fandom. A real one not like a crack ship. Like I guess off the top of my own head Catra and Perfuma

I'll never stop gushing about the good ship Glimmer and Double Trouble. As much as she loves her life as high queen, Glimmer needs to woo her a scoundrel now and then.

Catra and Perfuma is surprisingly sweet. Much like Glimmer, Perfuma - or should I say Tara - has a thing for reformed (or not so reformed) Horde hotties. I could see her having a fling with Lonnie as well.

Adora and Mermista have some really good fics. A bit Spinnerella and Netossa-vibes.

They rarely get over the dating stage, but I do find Bow and Perfuma really sweet (and I see no reason not to bring Glimmer in to get a constructive resolution of their prom woes).

Speaking of, Glimmer and Perfuma are very cute together. And Glimmer and Mermista (especially when Glimmer is young and naive and look up immensely to the cool pirate princess) and Glimmer and Huntara is great fun in "spoiled brat tries to chat up the badest butch in the biker bar" way and... dangit, I'm just recapping Glimmer Dates Everyone again, aren't I?

For some non-Glimmer rarepairs (which is fine too, I guess) Wrong Hordak and Double Trouble are fun in the 'cupcake + scoundrel' kinda way. Perfuma and Mermista can be sweet if you build on their friction in the show. Entrapta, of course, can be shipped with any piece of sufficently advanced technology, ai or princess that needs 'auntie trapta' to show them the ropes.

I don't exaclty know if Shadow Weaver and Castaspella counts as a rarepair - the ship has a dedicated following. Shadow Weaver and Angella on the other hand definately counts, if you are into toxic yuri milfs. I also kinda like to write Castaspella with just the tiniest lingering crush on Angella, and just a tiny bit of resentment that her bro asked her out first. I have also written a fic with Angella and Hordak, that even if it is a horribly wrong politically arranged marriaged can be a foundation to build on.

Bow and Sea Hawk need to go on hot pirate adventures together, and more often than not I like to bring in Mermista. X marks the spot. For whatever reason I also like to give Kyle some high see adventures with hot pirates. Oh! And Double Trouble flirting with Sea Hawk in the Peekablue episode never gets old.

Scorpia is immensely shippable. I don't count her being with Catra and Perfuma as rarepairs, but there are some wonderfully sweet Scorpia and Entrapta (with Emily as a child). I see her with Adora and even Mermista, and of course some glitter cuddles with Glimmer (dangit, I promised to stop bringing in Glimmer).

This is more of crack fick territory, but Horde Prime is useful in a 'bath her and bring her to my chamber' kind of way, as long as the object of his affection gets to bust his fucking orb before the story is over. There is lots of really sweet and thoughtful clone shipping that deal with the concept of intimacy, the hive mind and learning what it means to be your own person.

Oh, and Octavia and Huntara should totally be bitter exes.

I've said it before, I'll say it again. the Spop show is really good at presenting attraction, and that gives us so many fun ships to play with.

[secriden]

i'm really enjoying Monster Next Door's portrayal of introversion in diew.

diew is quiet and likes to minimise social interactions, but i like that he isn't portrayed as incapable of them. he's nice and helpful and responds reasonably when people approach/talk to him. if it's someone he recognises, even if he's not close to them, he's pleasant and if its someone new he's polite. it's just...refreshingly realistic.

when he runs into wan and beer at the noodle shop, that's probably the most visibly uncomfortable we see diew, and even then he's still nice and polite and answers wan reasonably. he gets away as soon as he can, but even as he leaves, he bows to his seniors and flashes a quick smile.

i like that the focus of his introversion is that he enjoys calm things - reading, listening to music on his headphones, jigsaws - and that he is comfortable just being alone in his space. but his introversion doesn't prevent him from understanding and empathising with others who want more social interaction or who enjoy leading more active/fast-pace lives.

when god apologises for wan 'bothering' him, diew explains that he doesn't have to apologise because he knows wan means no harm. he isn't angry or upset and he doesn't resent wan's extroversion just because he's introverted.

sometimes when filmmakers have an 'introverted' character we just see someone who seems to hate people and get annoyed when other people try to talk to them.

i just... appreciate that diew feels like a real, full person who is MORE than just his introversion. he has his hobbies, interests, and can get sucked into a conversation about his favourite book even with a stranger. he loves his turtle and his family and tries to please (or appease) his mom. he's kind (picks up the papers that flew out of gun's bag at the start), will stop to pet doggies (so relatable), gets frustrated at noisy neighbours but also forgives easily once god apologises.

at the same time, you get the sense that diew could use a bit more branching out. there's nothing wrong with his life, per se, but also meeting someone like god will open up new experiences for him in a way that will help him grow as a person.

and thankfully god seems like a really green-flag love interest thus far and shows a lot of promise for sweet sweet blossoming love down the line. not only does he accept the boundaries that diew places on their relationship, he also takes them 100% seriously. to the point that he puts on mask (at least partly) because he wants to honour the fact that diew doesn't want to see his face yet. and then runs away at the noodle shop once he realises that diew is there. like it's not just condescending indulgence - he respects what diew wants and is willing to make the effort to stick to his conditions! it makes me feel safe in rooting for this couple because already you can see how careful god is handling diew. <3

[the-great-empress]

Better with them than with you (partII)

Replaced au about obey me x what the "hell" is bad?

Here Mc is woman

warning: grammatical errors, English is not my native language

Tags: @huuvu

Part I | Part II | Part III

A long time ago Mc left with the “other” Satan, or as the six lords nicknamed him “Doppelgänger Satan”, the physiques and personalities of both Satans were opposite, however, their aromas and auras were identical like two drops of water, that “red thing” came from time to time to look for something that only Solomon, Simeon and Satan could give to Mc so that he can stay in the other hell

It's been a while since Michael and Raphael went to the house of lamentations to help Mc leave with the other Satan and to scold the brothers, except for the "real Satan", for abandoning Mc and the avatar of wrath when They needed them... when they almost died...

Michael in front of Mc seemed serene, although his eyes reflected sadness as he said goodbye to her, when Mc left... he was the one who was most upset, without warning the high-ranking angel slapped Lucifer with such force that it embedded him in the wall, Michael's face was of anger, pain and sadness, as if he had said goodbye to a great secret love, Raphael could swear that Michael would slap the rest of the brothers, Diavolo and the rest arrived in time before Michael "reconditioned" to his former companions, but only Luke was able to reason with Michael.

Even so, Michael points out Diavolo's negligence for letting Lilith's actions slide and allowing the other lords to behave that way towards Satan and Mc.

—If you really care about your plan to unite the three kingdoms, you better put on that crown that you use for your whims and not be soft on Lilith and the six Lords because BECAUSE OF THEIR FAULTS, the person who helped you the most in uniting left. to the three kingdoms and probably won't come back again

Diavolo did not punish them... or at least he did not give an exemplary punishment, he simply put them under house arrest, except for Satan, once again Diavolo was soft because of his affection for Lucifer. Michael and even Raphael and Solomon preferred that there be physical punishment, because the person who managed to connect the three kingdoms left due to the prince's negligence and favoritism, but again Luke defused the situation...

—Lord Satan~!! Ayeeee!

An adorable red mass appeared in front of the Lord of Wrath, the mass in question had a set of horns, bat wings and a tail, it was the adorable little demon that responded to the name of Ppyong, the little demon smiled radiantly at The demon held three black bags, one of them made a sound similar to full glass bottles hitting each other lightly, in fact, it had the silhouette of two bottles.

—Oh! Ppyong! I was wondering when you were coming. Are you coming for "that"?

—Yes, aye! Simeon and Solomon already contributed their parts, only Lord is missing, aye!

The smiling little demon handed him two of the bags, keeping only the one that had two bottles. The fourth brother gladly and smiling accepted them. As soon as he perceived the aroma of Mc coming from one of them, his face turned bright red and he ran to your room where you could have privacy

—Ppyong! How are you?! How is Mc?!

Another voice was present, it was Prince Diavolo accompanied by his loyal butler, both gave the image that "everything is fine" but not only were they there, there were also the rest of the lords, after all they were in the house of the laments, they had a haggard and neglected appearance, they even had circles under their eyes... they were... depressed and resentful as they stared at where Satan went...

What was “that” that only the former angel, magician and demon had to help Mc?

Why not them?

Will Mc be okay?

Why haven't you invoked them?

I miss you Mc…

Those were the thoughts of the six brothers

As for the cheerful Ppyong, he politely greeted the prince, butler and lords, the little demon was extremely oblivious to the thoughts and true situation of the brothers, he was only aware of the few things that Mc told him, positive things that were true later. After all, Ppyong earned a space in the heart of the human who did not have the courage to break the illusion that the demons of his reality were different from hers...

—I'm fine, aye! Mc… —his face expressed concern although he was also moved so much that he shed tears when he named her—, she continues to worry a lot about everyone, aye! Heals the wounded, she rebuilds destroyed houses and fights angels with her rare, out-of-this-world magic, Aye! She is a great demon, aye! Not to mention that she has the support and help of her ancestor Solomon, Miss Mc likes to talk and hear from him, aye~! —Ppyong exclaimed happily

Every time Mc heard about Lilith she seemed oblivious to the conversation.

She has never spoken about Lilith... the onlys exceptions was... before it was revealed that Lilith was her ancestor and... when Belphegor was going to kill her again

The demons of the Devildom were more than aware that the “others” of that “Hell” would not tell lies because of what said truth.

—Who would say that because our Solomon's descendants escape this reality centuries ago, we have been given the pleasure of knowing her, aye? She made some of Archangel Gabriel's feathers come off and she gave them to me. Do you want to see them, aye?

—A-ha... no thanks, I still haven't gotten used to the fact that in the other reality the angels are cruel —Diavolo spoke with his head down because the other reality was at war.

—Oh! I think we both have the same feeling Prince Diavolo, my body still doesn't get used to the little angel around even though he has proven to be a good demon and Miss Mc claims that he is good, Aye! …

—Sit with us Ppyong while you wait... whatever Satan is doing —Asmodeus spoke sweetly while making sure the little demon saw his eyes so that his charm could take effect— Come on~ sit next to me~ that bag looks heavy~ let me hold it for you while you get settled~

Since he first saw Ppyong, Asmodeus always used his charm on the little demon, at first the naive Ppyong obeyed Asmodeus, approaching him like moths to the light, however, shortly after placing his beautiful hands in those bags to know what “it” was once and for all, the stubborn Ppyong grabbed the bag and prevented him from doing so. “No, thank you, aye.” Ppyong rejected his proposals. “It must be something vital. Solomon gave the hint that it was “milky.” Could it be a potion?” Those present in the room thought, even Diavolo and Barbatos wanted to know, but Ppyong only limited himself to telling them that he promised Mc not to tell them, not even bribing him with all the things Ferrere could offer him would say that it was “that.”

—Mc is currently in Lost Paradise due to a sexual injury, aye! Although the same can be said for His Majesty Satan and His Majesty Mammon, aye —Ppyong reported smiling.

—I hope they get better —Diavolo said until his brain clicked like the rest— Wait... What?

The six brothers stood with stunned eyes and open mouths, they felt a horrible sensation in their stomachs, perhaps among the six the worst who felt at that moment was Mammon for listening to his counterpart, Mc and the word with “s” in the same sentence

Did she replace them?...

They had to go, she wouldn't replace them. Right?

Mc managed to have a threesome with whb Mammon and whb Satan

When they find out what "that" is and how she has a connection with the three kingdoms, she take from each one 🤣

Even though Simeon is still a ex angel here, he was the candidate that Ppyong wouldn't try to kill him on first sight.

[bloody-cupcakes]

Love Quinn x yandere/dark! reader; you express your displeasure with her giving her attention to someone else

Tw: yandere/dark content, gender neutral reader, the reader and Love are married, toxic/unhealthy relationship, implied infidelity, kidnapping/murder, very brief mentioned wine drinking, pretty graphic self harm (cutting) used as a form of "punishment" (you'll see what I mean), Love is kind of scared of you but also loves you because of it, this is really gory and dark and I'm not even sorry

You watched from the background as Love spoke with one of the regular customers that frequented her bakery, trying not to scowl as they touched her arm and moved in closer. Couldn't they see the gold band on her ring finger? She was already taken by you, and they'd be stupid not to know that.

Love glanced over when she felt your eyes on her, trying not to react when she saw the stormy look in your eyes. It could mean so many different things, you looking at her like that, which meant she had no idea whether she should feel frightened, aroused, or angry. Maybe a combination of all three.

"Excuse me," she politely spoke to the customer before making her way over to you. "Hey, honey. How are things? I wasn't expecting you to come visit the bakery today." She smiled, that bright, charming smile that you so adored. If you hadn't been so pissed off, you might've smile some yourself.

"Who was that person you were talking to?" You asked instead, subtly pointing in their direction.

"Oh, them? They're just a customer. They come in once a week to try a new pastry." She merely shrugged it off, trying to act natural as she walked past you, heading for the kitchen in the back.

"Is that the only reason why they come in?" You further pressed while you followed behind her, not ready to drop the subject just yet.

Love stopped and turned to face you. "What are you trying to imply here, exactly?" She snapped, her tone firm and harsh. Anyone else, and they would've cowered in fear, apologizing before quickly running for cover.

But you weren't just anyone. You were her spouse, and more importantly you weren't afraid of her, despite knowing what she was capable of.

"You know what," you hissed out in an equally harsh tone, narrowing your eyes as you glared at her. "I know you've been cheating on me, I just didn't think you would be so stupid as to do it right in front of my face."

She scoffed, as if offended by your words. "Don't be ridiculous, I'm not cheating. You're just paranoid. Now, get out. I have orders to fill, and I don't need you of all people getting in my way."

Despite the resentment you were currently harboring towards her, you did as she said. Besides, you had your own work to keep you busy.

Later that night, she returned home to find her not-so-secret lover tied up and dead in the kitchen. She both admired and resented you for your determination to get rid of anyone who thought they could touch your wife and get away with it.

"Hello, dear," you greeted casually as you sat at the kitchen table, a glass of wine in one hand and a small knife in the other. "Please, won't you sit with me?"

She gulped, knowing better than to argue. "What, um, what are you going to do with that knife?"

"Oh, I think you know." Setting down your wine glass, you pulled up your sleeve and held out your arm wrist up, positioning the knife over the skin there.

"No, please-" she gasped as she realized what you were going to do. It wasn't the first time you'd cut yourself as a punishment for her infidelity, and you doubted it would be the last.

"You know better than to fool around with people behind my back. And since their death doesn't seem to have that big of an affect on you, maybe this will."

Holding the knife in a steady grip, you took it and slowly cut open the inside of your arm, barely flinching when the blade hit your skin. She watched with horror as you cut yourself, her heart starting to beat rapidly inside her chest as panic and dread bubbled up inside her, threatening to explode.

"D- Don't! Don't do that, please -" she begged desperately, tears filling her eyes and streaming down her cheeks in salty rivers of sorrow. The mere sight alone of your blood spilling out onto your skin was enough to send her into a fit. "I'm so, so sorry, I'll- I'll never cheat on you again, honey, I swear, I swear I won't-"

You tried not to allow a smirk to crack your otherwise aloof expression, well aware that you were about to get exactly what you wanted. Her, you would never dream of hurting in a million years. Not physically, anyway. But emotional manipulation? Now, that was right up your alley.

"Sh, Love. It's alright, it's okay," you murmured gently as you set down the knife, which was now stained with your blood. "Go get me the first aid kit so we can fix this, alright?"

She nodded her head in agreement, obeying your command as she quickly got up and left to find the first aid kit for you. When she returned, she sat down next to you, her tears having mostly dried despite the lingering proof of her sudden outburst on her face: her lashes were wet and dewy, and her eyes were puffy and red.

You knew just how much it tore her apart to see you get hurt, especially if it was you hurting yourself over something she did. After this, you had no doubt that she'd think twice about running into the arms of someone else, and that she'd have all of her attention on you for at least the next few months. The thought alone made you want to smile.

Her hands were shaking as she carefully cleaned the wound and patched it up, and you could tell she felt guilty for being the one to cause such a thing. "I'm sorry," she breathed out in a trembling voice, her bottom lip stuck out in a sad and apologetic pout. "I'm so, so sorry, I- I never, ever meant for something like this to happen."

If her lover's dead body that was still residing in the kitchen gave her cause for outrage before, it was certainly forgotten about by now. Everything was playing out exactly as you'd hoped.

You reached your hand out to hold her cheek, giving her a reassuring look as you used your thumb to wipe away a stray tear. "I know you didn't, sweetheart. It's alright, I'm not upset with you." Not anymore, anyway. Certainly not after teaching her a lesson she'd remember for a good long while.

[sevikas-biceps]

[TLDR: me rationalising and then ranting about why Caitlyn and Cassandra are both in the wrong]

Y'all. We love Cait, and we do stan Cassandra in some regards—but be fucking for real. Think of them as real people, in the real world, doing real things. Y'all would hate them. I'm putting Cait's gay love and Cass' gay support aside—because I really do feel like a lot of people gloss over their flaws just because of the queer rep and allying.

Think of it. The Kiramman's ventilation system was the bare fucking minimum being done for the people of Zaun. Caitlyn weaponising it is literally a violation of human rights practices. We know how privileged Topside is, we know there are at least sympathetic characters out there—and both of these are true for the Kirammans. What does this imply? That the Kirammans were essentially one of those at the top of the hierarchy, and this put them in a complete position of ability to help.

But they didn't. That's the issue, people.

One of the previous matriarchs putting the vent system into place was to solve the matter of the air pollution, yes—but arguably, the people of the Undercity shouldn't have had to deal with that problem to begin with. Cassandra might've been aware it existed; she gave her daughter the key, after all. However, that does not mean she actively came to the aid of the people of Zaun. Hell, do you think she was even aware of Silco, for instance? At the beginning? Maybe she'd've heard whispers from informants, about some old peacekeeper people called the Hound, and then about some mysterious tycoon taking his place. Maybe Grayson said something about the Undercity's concerns in the past, during the time of the first insurrection, but the Council took no note of it. Maybe Cassandra had someone else in place to make her dealings, if ever she dabbled in that black market shit.

Whatever else you can think of with that line of thinking; at the end of the day, it just proves that Cassandra herself was only another person stuck in the cycle—she did her job, she was cunning and selfish, she played the game. It's just business. It's just politics. No more, no less. The original line-up on the Council had members that were either ignorant, negligent, or corrupt (and yes; that includes Heimerdinger, Mel, and Jayce you guys)—and Cassandra was no better. Again, they all were part of the same damn cycle to begin with.

What makes Cassandra remarkable as a character—to us, the audience—is that she's remembered as someone redeemable because of her love for her family, for Caitlyn; that she was willing to try for her daughter's sake and happiness. Caitlyn. Not the city, not her kid's new girlfriend, and most certainly not Zaun. Above all else, it boils down to her little girl. Her only child. Cassandra being on the Council meant that she could give that child the best life that she could; Cassandra being on the Council meant that the child has a future. It implies that peripherally, she was aware of the Undercity's issues—hence the little frustrations exchanged about Caitlyn becoming an officer and venturing into the Undercity in Season 1.

That's her redeeming quality. Duty for family.

[If you want a visualisation of her actual nature, I'd honestly recommend using Olenna Tyrell, Tywin Lannister, and Jon Arryn from ASoIaF/GoT as points of reference.]

Now, onto Caitlyn herself. Credit where credit is due; the girl is in the middle of grieving, and she's being denied the chance to have even that. She doesn't deserve that. No one does. It would be unfair to deal her an amount of resentment for going unstable, when we'd all been rooting for Jinx for half of the same reasons in Season 1. But that's the issue: half of the same reasons.

Let's be honest for a quick second here. Do we really think Caitlyn would've ever gone down to the Undercity had Jinx never attacked on Progress Day? With someone like Marcus hot on her trails, if he lives in this hypothetical alternate reality, I imagine she wouldn't even be placed near the bridge(s) to begin with. And if, in canon, he'd survived the explosion, I can also see Caitlyn being put on house arrest—because if Marcus himself is outed as working with Silco (similar to how Grayson did with Vander), then that's all the more reason to keep the Kiramman heiress away from danger, or worse, death. If things are so bad that the Sheriff, symbolically a paragon of justice and protection, resorted to consorting with the enemy...well, what then? What does that say about the system? What does that say about Piltovan society?

Back to Caitlyn. I'm a firm supporter of the idea that she never would've been put into a potential line of fire had life gone on normally. If Jinx never stole the hexcrystals, then Caitlyn would have no reason to snoop around; Vi is still in Stillwater, Silco is at large, and so on and so forth. Caitlyn remains largely ignorant of the world she lives in. It's noble that she genuinely wanted to help people. But in a place like Piltover? She'd be worse than Jayce when Season 1 began. I'm sure she'd no doubt notice the surrounding manipulations in her life, or how flawed their reality could be—but the point is, at the end of the day, it's still a privileged life that she leads.

Let that word sink in. Privileged. This isn't to disparage her original desire to make her society a better place—I do think that Caitlyn has the potential to do so if she exerted her efforts into long-term developments that could fulfil that vision. But this is where it gets tricky—especially in the context of Season 2. She had all of those resources at her disposal. She was aware of the consequences in using them—how it might affect civilians, innocents. And she still did so anyway. Strike one.

For all that she was a decorated officer, it's really the personal vendetta against Jinx that made her unfit to lead the strike team to begin with. I imagine Vi refused the enforcer position at first not just because of her and her people's history with the authority, but because it's so blatant that doing so enabled Caitlyn to act in her anger. By accepting the badge, Vi validated Caitlyn's need for vengeance. Not that Caitlyn is unreasonable in wanting such a thing, mind, but what is unreasonable was how tone-deaf she'd become in the process of grieving, forgetting that it's not just her own interests on the line, but others' too. Strike two.

There's nothing wrong with Caitlyn at the beginning—the girl just wanted so solve a crime. But then circumstances came up. And then, all of a sudden, she has to choose between duty or self-interest. What the show does is that it gives a convenient solution for Caitlyn to be able to serve both her duty and her own self-interest(s): invade/scour Zaun, she catches a criminal and delivers justice for the Council; find Jinx, Cassandra is avenged and Vi may find closure. The fight at Janna's temple is where it all indeed goes to shit, as we can see, and that's where Caitlyn really slips off in my opinion. She'd toed the line when she asked Vi to wear the badge—but it's really when Isha (a child) got involved and later on when she struck Vi herself (a betrayal), that her motives get warped. Strike three.

My main argument is that Cassandra and Caitlyn were both in the wrong, in one way or another, albeit for different and varied reasons. The former didn't do enough for the situation at hand, and the latter seems to be doing too much at once. Cassandra herself seemed to have enabled her daughter's worse traits, too, whether directly or indirectly; and this is what makes up much of the character that we see Caitlyn evolving into.

There are many aspects of both mother and daughter that have always been there, or, at least, have had the potential to be there, such as: the ruthlessness, the narrow focus, the determination, the strictness—and, most of all (and I have a feeling this is going to be controversial), the hypocrisy. We know, for a fact, that Caitlyn and Cassandra are at least self-aware. To merely label them as naïve or inexperienced (to life) is a gross disservice to their characters. On some level, they're cognisant of their status and ability in society (evidenced by baby!Cait's scepticism regarding Grayson's trophy, and Cass' agreement to support their case at the Council meeting)—and they both have exacted measures in the face of what is demanded of them.

This is the reason that Caitlyn weaponising the Grey, using the Kiramman's ventilation system, is more or less unforgivable. Just because it had Vi's hesitant approval, it didn't make it right. Vi counts as an unreliable narrator in this case—when we know that she, in multiple instances, easily caves when someone she's attached to doubles down on her.

We, as the audience, can at least agree on the moralities regarding the authorisation of the strike team; and that means that we, as people analysing the show, can also agree that the effects of an act such as using the Grey can be devastating. We see this in Viktor's chronic illness, we see this with Silco's asphyxiation trick on the Chembarons, we see this when Jinx knocks out Sevika, we see this in Cassandra's notes. Stop trying to downplay the Grey. Stop trying to justify a fucking war crime. 'Oh, but it's just knock-out gas'—baby, no it's not. It's really not. Smeech explicitly says this: factory smoke trapped underground. Smoke. It's still gas. There's no safe way of administering it in high doses. That's like smoking Marlboro Reds taken beyond the extreme, and fuelled by gasoline of all things.

I'm not villainising Caitlyn, but some of y'all also need to stop excusing what she did—and I'm saying this because a lot of you also did the same with Jinx in Season 1. For the lack of a better example; it's very much like excusing what serial killers of the past had done because they were 'interesting' or 'charming' or hell, relatable. Be Gay, Do Crime is most definitely not applicable here, you guys. Seriously.

That is literally the reason Vi snaps at Caitlyn after the fight with Jinx. Why are you the one acting like her? It's not just a comparison between Caitlyn and Jinx, it's not just vendetta against vendetta; in a broader context, Vi is asking: Why are you resorting to the same acts of terrorism? Why are you enforcing the same tactics your predecessors used? Why are you turning into what you once swore not to become? Why are you doing this? What are you turning into?

Vi asked Caitlyn to promise her not to change. But she did.

Why are you betraying yourself?

[ride-thedragon]

THE FINAL GIRLS: (A show post about potential adaptations and combined characters)

So, for those of you who do not know the final girls are a term I gave to Rhaena, Nettles, and Baela a while ago because they are the three girls who survive the Dance and seemingly live full lives.

There has been discourse and leaks as well as rumours that Nettles won't be involved this season (we knew this because she wasn't casted, the showrunner confirmed it) and her plot would be given to Rhaena.

I, for one, don't think that last part is true. The person who leaked that Rhaena would claim a dragon didn't say Sheepstealer (allegedly because the props used weren't labelled) and although I do think it is Sheepstealer the idea that she'd take Nettles role is unsure because they are just writing the next season.

Now I'm both delusional and reserving my right to freak out about that whole subplot unfolding because I adore them both and wanted Rhaena’s Vale arc to be prominent. I also will say that I understand the need to make sense of something that doesn't seem to. This isn't an attack on fans. So we are going with the former with this post.

I don't think Rhaena is taking Nettles' place, entirely at least.

I think she claims her dragon, but that could be the extent of it.

My counterarguements for certain fan plot point changes:

RHAENA.

1. Rhaenyra will get mad at Rhaena for leaving Viserys and Aegon to travel alone and will be resentful towards her, ordering killing later on.

No. The reason that works with Nettles is that she has no political stakes. She is a common girl on a dragon. Unlike Rhaena, who is a lady of the court and now a ward of Jeyne with her dragon. With all the animosity they are sowing, it's very unlikely and almost impossible for Rhaenyra to do that. That's kinslaying and breaking guestright. She'd lose the Riverlands, not just Maidenpool as Daemon is doing right now. Rhaenyra can't just call Rhaena a witch, you know. It's not that easy. Finally, to this point, I don't see why Rhaena would leave her brothers and the Vale since she just solved Jeyne Arryn's biggest problem right now. We could make the argument that she goes to help, but it doesn't make a lot of sense to leave the Vale without her huge dragon and for her to to go the Dragonstone even if she doesn't know about the Dragonseed plot.

2. She'll get the Romantic plot with Daemon.

I know this is a joke, but I need us collectively to put our thinking caps on.

3. Daemon will save her from Rhaenyra.

I love your enthusiasm and maybe on a show that focused on her at all, I'd believe it, but I don't think so. I don't think she's going to get that arc because there is no reason for it. I think Rhaena could stay in the Vale for the rest of her arc, but more than likely, if she gets Sheepstealer, he'll die in Battle. So I don't think she will. Specifically, I don't think so because they've added two other dragons that weren't flying in the book, Syrax and Moondancer. So I don't think she's very high up on the list of people who will fly with Daemon should the God's Eye play out the same way. It's a lesser point as well, but this ruins his arc in the book. Him saving Nettles was him taking the hard way out, letting her fly, betraying Rhaenyra, and killing Aemond and himself. Him doing the same to Rhaena wouldn't have that impact because she's his daughter and Valyrian. Nettles was a nobody of dubious parentage being ordered to be killed by his queen. Killing her wouldn't have cost him much.

4. Rhaena assumes the Nettles persona.

No. But this time it's because she doesn't need to. Rhaena is a Targaryen. She does not need to hide the fact that she claims a dragon. I can see the argument that she does it to fly with Daemon, but Nettles wasn't the reason Aemond didn't fight Daemon. It was the fact that he'd be up against 2 dragons. Lastly, it could be to sneak out of the Vale, but again, having a dragon negates the need to hide. She can fly away in the dead of night, and no Vale soldier would stop her because she has a huge dragon and could check on him casually. It would just be too ridiculous and reductive.

I think those are the immediate point for her. So moving on:

BAELA.

1. Baela take Nettles plot.

I think this does work in one context alone, which is for the Battle of the Gullet. Baela has both connections to Jace and Driftmark. If someone has to it would be her but I do still think a lot of the issues remain with the dact that Baela doesn't seem to have an attachment to Driftmark, nor does she seem like the type to cry after. For Jace probably, but it makes a lot more sense for her to become like Rhaenyra in the books after. She's hardened by it and puts on a brave face, but I can see it if they have too.

2. Baela flys to kill Aemond.

I don't think so, for one reason, Moondancer is really young. As young as Vermax in this case and because of that, I don't think she will. It's not a fair fight. They sent two large dragons in the book for Vhagar for a reason, so sending Moondancer seems improbable. Now she does have an emotional stake, but I do think her efforts would be better marked at Tumbleton than anywhere else or in King's Landing/ Dragonstone to fulfil her book arc.

Baela has less speculation so I will move on to:

NETTLES

Obviously, she's has the brunt of this. Her character isn't being reduced. They just haven't given her a designated actress and are giving her story points away to others allegedly. There is the argument that they are reserving a dragonrider to introduce with Daeron, that she'd claim another dragon, but it's all a lot of guesswork at this point.

If they include her, they'll have to change many aspects of her character. I can see them playing into the non Valyrian rumours as well as the witch ones to call back to now with Daemon's time with Alys, but again, this is speculation. If they do include her, and her narrative can go anywhere, So to not be entirely doomeristic, they can still include her by changing her dragon, introducing her with Daeron and keeping her plot relatively similar with a lot more magic to mirror Alys and Aemond with Daemon and her. Or even normally. And to the people saying the audiences would be confused by too many black people, just let me know when I lose you with this game of who are these characters (what side are they on)?

Round 1.

Round 2.

Round 3 (double feature)

I need you all to stop excusing racism. General audiences have been doing and will do just fine if they add another black character.

With that in mind, we shall see.

Lastly, Miscellaneous:

This is for other rumours and such that don't apply to these 3 girls but apply to Nettles most likely.

1. Addam/ Mysaria/ Alys are taking Nettles' place in Maidenpool.

This has to do with scars, chemistry and trying to make an unwritten narrative make sense.

For Mysaria's scar, she isn't the only character to have additional scars. Also, they seem to be keeping the book plot as Mistress of Whispers. I feel like they've added scars to everything, not just her. So this alone doesn't seem to be the case.

For Addam, I've not got the slightest clue but I think they are keeping his book plot as well for the most part.

And as for Alys, Aemond has to pay guys, I'm sorry, but he does. His goth girlfriend to reformed kinslayer arc might just be something to look forward to. She also seems to hate Daemon.

2. Dyana is taking Nettles' plot.

No.

3. Too many dragons.

I can see the argument that they are giving team black too many dragons and counter argument. They don't seem to care. Apparently, they can't adapt Rhaena and Baela without dragons, but they don't see how that makes them overpowered. By the end, like I've said, team black will have 2 dragons they didn't before. So, I don't see why we need to hold for realism at this point. Let them claim all the dragons.

4. They are white washing Rhaenyra.

I don't want to get into all of that, but Nettles doesn't exist to just make Rhaenyra look bad. She's her anthesis, her foil in the narrative. In a very similar way to Alicent last season, removing her removes Rhaenyra's character in the second half of the story. Whether they realise it or not, Rhaenyra's plot is dependent on Nettles.

5. Ulf or Daeron are getting her plot.

Ew and ew. That's just nasty and unfortunate. They already dragged Ulf from Dragonstone to King's Landing, I feel like that's enough. As for Daeron, I can see a world where he looks similar to Alicent, but I don't think she stepped out of her marriage once. Not that she couldn't, but she wouldn't.

All of this to say, we shall see. The season isn't over, and I'm of no authority to say how this will play out. Right now, it just seems like they are breaking up her story down different lines trying to see which is the best fit (none are). I can't and won't give an answer like my name is Ryan Condal until he confirms she isn't there in his adaptation.