thebarnespack

[mydadleft471]

Carian Tea And Bitter Medicine

Summary: You've fallen ill and Messmer is deeply worried for his wife. Over the coming days, you slowly recover.

Spoilers for Elden Ring and Shadow of the Erdtree. No warnings other than talk of throwing up. (yuck)

This was a request from @writing-fanics! I'll link it here if you want to see the post. This was super fun! I love writing for the red-haired snake man (clearly that's literally all my blog is lmao). Thank you for requesting and I hope I did it justice!

As always, thank you all so much for reading, liking, commenting, and reblogging! It means the world to me and I'm so happy I've gotten back into writing!

Messmer had barely left your side for the few days. He was worried sick. No matter how much his servants and healers told him you’d be alright with some rest and medicine, he couldn’t seem to believe them. He thought you were dying, and he could only sit idly by while you suffered. Watching you writhe felt like a stab wound, searing and sharp, right to his chest.

You, his darling wife, looked terrible. A sheen of sweat covered your body even in your lightest nightgown, yet you stayed wrapped in blankets. Chills would wrack your body one minute, and the next you’d be pushing at the blankets because you were overheating. You’d refused almost all food except for a light broth, though it still threatened to come back up. Water wasn’t any easier, and your condition had seemingly gotten worse. Your skin was pale and your eyes didn’t shine like they usually did.

Messmer tried to keep himself busy to drive away the thoughts that plagued his mind. He’d fetch you a cold washcloth and lay it delicately over your forehead, or help you sit up when you’d request a drink of water. You were too weak to lift anything, so he’d carefully tip the glass back enough for you to take small sips.

You’d been confined to the bed for five days due to your sickness. Each morning he’d wake and hope to see you better and healthy once more, but it hadn’t happened yet.

He didn’t sleep well last night, jolting awake in response to any sound you’d make. Rubbing the sleep from his eyes, he saw you trying to sit up. He hurried to your side immediately, helping you.

“What bothers thee, wife?”

“I just wanted some water. I didn’t want to wake you. I know you haven’t been sleeping much these past few days.” You croak out.

“It bothers me little,” he says while moving to fetch you a glass of cool water. “How dost thou feel this morning?”

“I’m actually hungry, so I’d assume that’s good.”

“I am so very happy to hear that, beloved. Whatever thou wishest for, it shall be done.” He smiles for the first time in days.

“Right now,” you gesture towards him, “I’d love some water.”

He sits beside you on the bed and moves it towards your lips. Your hand finds his and, though shaky, you help tilt the glass back. After a few sips, you tap his wrist and he returns the glass to your bedside table.

“Thank you, husband.” You shoot him a weak smile and his stomach flips. Marriage did little to dull the butterflies you gave him.

“What dost thou desire for breakfast?”

“I don’t mind, really. If we have any left, I’d love to have some of that delicious spiced Carian tea Rellana gifted to us.”

“Of course, beloved.” He gently guides you to lay back down. One of his serpents nips at the blanket and brings it over you. You pat its head in thanks.

“Wilt thou be alright for a short while?” His heart twists uncomfortably thinking about leaving you alone, even if it is just to request food for you.

“Yes, my love. You never stay away for very long.” 

“It pains me to leave thee.”

You grab his hand and squeeze weakly.

“I know. But I’m hungry.” As if on cue, your stomach growls.

“I shall return shortly, my wife.” He kisses your forehead and makes his way towards the door.

Outside, he’s pleased to see a dozen of his most trusted knights. When you fell ill, he ensured you’d be safe from any outside threats. His men were fiercely loyal to both him and his beloved wife.

Noticing the creaking of the door, Fire Knight Salza bowed in greeting.

“How is our Lady, my Lord?”

“She is slowly recovering, though still sick.”

“Shall I send for a servant to bring her food?”

“Yes. She’s requested Rellana’s specialty Carian tea.”

“Ah, a personal favorite of mine. I’ll see her desire fulfilled, my Lord.”

Messmer nods and returns to you, shutting the door swiftly. You’re still laying down on the bed, the covers pulled over you. He sits on the bed and smooths a few rebellious strands of hair down.

“I probably look awful.”

“Never.”

You roll your eyes. “You always were a poor liar, Messmer.”

“I shall never utter a word of disgust or mocking towards thee, beloved.” Even like this, you were beautiful to him.

“I know.” You bring a hand up to cup his cheek and he moves forward, sighing into your touch.

“If I must describe thee, I would say thou lookest sick. Nothing more.”

“How sweet of you. I’m sure if I looked in a mirror, it would shatter.”

“Nonsense.” He kisses your knuckle. “I shall hear these false notions no longer.”

“Fine. But I could probably use a bath.”

“If that is thine desire.”

“Only if you bathe me.” You playfully wink at him. His face reddens.

“Dost thou know no decency?”

“No,” you reply, giggling. “Not around you, at least.”

A sudden knock at the door distracts him. He releases your hand and rises from the bed.

“Enter.” His voice sounds so different when he speaks to anyone but you.

A servant comes in with a small tray of food. They gently set it down on the table beside you and bow to you both before leaving as quickly as they came.

You push yourself to sit up. Messmer moves to help you, but you refuse and slowly get up on your own. He shakes his head at your stubbornness, but he’s happy to see you regaining some strength. Just yesterday you could barely lift your head.

You look over the tray of food and see a bowl of steaming broth with some noodles, a vial of medicine, and your Carian tea. Messmer brings the tray closer to you and you move to pick up the bowl of soup. You feel the worry radiating off of him at the prospect of you burning yourself.

“I’m alright, my love. Just a little weak.” 

You take an experimental sip of your broth and nausea doesn’t immediately make you want to spit it out. Pleased, you continue to take small sips and bites. You hadn’t realized how hungry you were, and soon, the bowl is empty. Messmer looks ecstatic that you’ve managed to eat something. 

“How dost thou feel?”

“Fine, actually. Can I have my tea?”

“Medicine first, beloved.”

“Yes, sir.” You tease. He bites his tongue and gives you a look.

He grabs the small vial and takes the cork off. It smells horrible.

“Tell me, does this concoction taste as badly as it smells?” His nose crinkles in disgust and his serpents hiss and recoil.

“Unfortunately.” Taking the vial and tilting your head back, you pour it all into your mouth at once and swallow as quickly as you can. The bitterness coats your tongue and almost burns. You will yourself to not gag and your face scrunches up in displeasure. You can’t wait until you’re better so you no longer have to taste this.

You gesture towards your tea and Messmer hands it to you. You drink some and the bitter taste of medicine slowly recedes to a soothing spice on your tongue. 

“Would you like some?” You gesture towards the tea.

“No, beloved. I would not steal thy favorite tea from thee.”

“You can steal my medicine.” You smile at him from behind your cup.

“I wouldst rather drown.” You laugh.

“Me too.”

“Thou art braver than I.” He refers to your medicine. He places the empty bottle back on the tray and his serpents eye it warily.

You finish your tea and set it down with the rest of your dishes. Messmer moves the tray back to the table for a servant to take away later. He smiles, happy that you’ve finished everything brought to you today. You seemed to be getting better, and for that, he was grateful. Some color had returned to your smooth skin and your eyes seemed more alert.

“Would you come hold me?” You shoot him a pleading glance.

“Thou knowest my weakness, wife. I shall never say no to thee.”

“You just did.” He gently scoots into bed beside you.

“Hmm?” He tilts his head.

“You said you wouldn’t steal my tea. You technically said no to me.” You pout.

He shakes his head, drawing you closer in his arms. His serpents wind protectively over you and you sigh, content.

“I am afraid thou art taking mine words too literally.”

“Maybe.” You mumble into his chest.

“Sleep. Exhaustion clings to thee.” He strokes your hair.

He expects a response from you, and a witty one at that. Perhaps something about how he’s confusing exhaustion for not bathing regularly. But he looks down and you’re fast asleep, tucked into him. He wonders if the Carian tea puts one to sleep. If so, he needs to have a plentiful supply.

His darling wife is getting better, and it did not even require him to pray to Mother. He will dwell on the implications of that later.

[golbrocklovely]

privacy please // colby brock

A/N: me, posting more than once a month??? INCREDIBLE. i was midway thru writing "let's fall in love for tonight" when this idea popped into my head and i just had to write it down. part of this is inspired by a tiktok i saw of a girl talking about a time she was hooking up with a guy. i wish i could find the tiktok and share it with you all bc the moment she said what she said.... i just knew i had to include it in a fic at some point lol so shoutout to that girl. this is a short fic/blurb bc i have some other fics lined up that are gonna be full blown smut so i don't want to tucker myself out writing smut only. and if you see me using what happens in this fic in other fics.... say nothing sksks lmk what you think and i'll see you guys next time <3

prompt: you and colby just want some privacy, but the only place you can get it is in his car. || fem!reader x colby brock

trigger warning: light smut (no actual sex), cursing, making out in a car, fluff, already established relationship

word count: 1363

~~~~~~~~

"This is so ridiculous." Colby groaned, pulling away from our kiss.

I giggled, staring up at his annoyed face. "No it's not, it's kinda fun."

"How is this fun? I feel like I'm gonna pull a hamstring." He scoffed.

I sassed him, rolling my eyes. "Well, it's your fault you don't have a car big enough for your five foot eleven ass."

"I don't think I was meant to lay out horizontally in my car." He replied back, just as snarky.

"Well, blame Toyota," I sat up on my elbows, huffing. Does he think I'm comfortable in this cramped back seat? "Or better yet, Sam and Kat for wanting to have their friends over when all we want to do is fuck."

"Maybe if you weren't so loud, we could have sex in my room without everyone knowing." Colby raised an eyebrow at me daringly. I could see his bottom lip quiver as he tried to hold back a laugh.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "You never seemed to have a problem with my screaming before. I'll gladly remember next time you're begging me to say your name to be quiet."

He gasped, legitimately upset. "Begging?! I don't beg."

"'C'mon baby, say my name.'" I mocked in a deep voice. "What's that sound like to you?"

"Commanding!" He barked.

"Not when you're breathy it ain't!" I jeered sarcastically.

Colby sat up quickly, pouting jokingly. He kept my legs on his lap, his hands cupping my ankles. I sighed deeply, smiling up at the ceiling of the car. "Are you really not enjoying this?"

He chuckled, the 'tension' in the car defusing. "I enjoy any time I get to be alone with you."

I hummed, "Good to know. I think this is kinda exciting. It feels like I'm a teenager again, sneaking around with a boyfriend my mom doesn't know about."

"Am I, like, your edgy boyfriend?" He questioned, side eyeing me.

"Oh yeah. You have tattoos, wear all black, curse, drink..." I gasped, "Oh my God, you're, like, so cool."

Colby bit his lip, staring at me intensely. "Get over here."

He grabbed my wrists lightly, pulling me up. I straddled him, a soft grunt falling from his lips as a I settled onto his lap. "Much better." He murmured.

I studied his face for a moment, taking in all the little details I could. The way his hair fell, covering his forehead. The lovely shape of his eyebrows, manicured without him trying - which was honestly the most annoying thing about him. He also had surprisingly long eyelashes for a man, something I was jealous about as well. His eyes - which of course were to die for. So blue and deep. I had stared into them so many times I had lost count. I never saw the end of them, never studied them long enough to know every intricate detail about them. I don't think there would ever be enough time to do that.

"Hi." Colby whispered, softly smiling.

A light blush came to my cheeks, "Hi."

My hands cupped his face sweetly, his eyes closing at the feeling. I gazed at his cheeks; how adorable they were. I would try my best to remind him that even though he didn't like them himself, I enjoyed his "chubby" cheeks. His dimples. Oh my GOD, his dimples. If I could, I would take a picture of every time I was able to make his dimples appear. I would fill a whole photo album of just his face smiling. And I can't forget his nose. His nose was so... masculine, in an interesting way. It fit his face perfectly. Angular with a slight point.

And then of course his lips. I've had dreams of just kissing him. Of just staring at his mouth. Sometimes it's hard to pay attention to him when he talks because all I can think about is his lips and what they've done to me, and what they plan to do.

He laced his fingers through mine, finally breaking the silence in the car. "What's going on in that head of yours? You look so lost in thought."

"I'm just... looking at you." I confessed.

"You like what you see?" He mumbled.

"Love." I emphasized.

He nodded his head, his eyes filled with adoration. He rested his forehead against mine, our lips brushing. His hand slid out of mine, meeting his other on the small of my back. "You are one of the best things that has ever happened to me."

"The feeling is completely mutual." I agreed.

"Good to know...." He leaned in and pecked my lips gently, almost taking my breath away. He pushed my body into his, pressing me as closely as he could. I deepened the kiss, my fingers tugging on his hair. His tongue slid into my mouth, a moan leaving my lips. My hips naturally grinded down onto him, his hands gripping my waist a little harder from the friction.

He moved his mouth from mine, kissing down my neck and finding the perfect spot in seconds. I lulled my head back, allowing him to attack my neck with his lips and tongue and teeth. I whimpered, my hips bucking against his. He pushed his up, grinding just against the right spot to make my breath hitch. I could feel him getting harder under me, pressing against me in the most sinful way. His hands drifted to my thighs, rubbing up and down them.

"You know..." Colby chimed in, breathlessly. "I really love these fishnets."

I uttered, in a daze. "Wha-?"

He continued his motions, causing goosebumps to form on my skin, "I really like that you wear fishnets. They look so sexy on you."

I cleared my throat, finally able to think again. "Um, thank you."

"It's too bad they just take forever to get off." He somewhat grumbled, dropping his head.

I shrugged halfheartedly. "Yeah, I guess."

"How many pairs do you have?" He asked, looking back up at me.

"Of fishnets? Like five or so." I guessed.

Colby nodded. "And how much was this pair?

"What?" I squinted at him, confused. He blinked, wanting me to continue. "Uh, they were like $25."

"Okay...." He paused, his hands resting on top of my thighs. "Remind me to pay you back."

Before I could say anything, Colby's grip tightened on the fishnets. His fingers laced through the holes in the material. He pulled his arms back, ripping the fishnets with ease. I shuttered at his action, gasping in awe, anger, and lust at seeing him tear them without any problems. Feeling them rip from my body, my skin now exposed, caused heat to rush to my sex. My underwear grew even more wet as my eyes met his dark ones.

"Colby! What the fuck?!" I yelled.

"Don't tell me you didn't like that." He grew close to my face, his voice lowering, "Don't lie to me, baby."

I stammered, trying to form words under his lustful gaze. "T-That's not the point. What are you, an animal?"

"Only with you, darling." He whispered harshly.

My breath raced as I glared into Colby's eye. He had such a devilish look to him, and while I was pissed he would rip my favorite tights, it was also extremely hot.

"Fuck, I hate you." I yanked his face forward, forcing his lips onto mine deeply. He smirked against the kiss, humming a response playfully. I snaked my tongue into his mouth, needing to taste him.

He pulled away, catching his breath at my expense. "Are you sure you want to do this? I can't exactly get on top of you."

"If you have to fuck me in the trunk, then so be it. I just need you to do it now." I gripped his shirt, wanting it off his body.

He laughed darkly. "I don't know... you're demanding a lot for someone that's very breathy."

"Colby, don't fucking tease me." I grabbed his hand, sliding it into my underwear and putting his fingers against my heat. I breathed, "I'm so wet for you."

He swallowed hard, his pupils dilating. "Okay... I think we can manage something."

[actual-changeling]

Uh. Hi! I'm Alex and I love writing pain.

I've seen the angst war going on and I am incredibly tempted to contribute; I'm not quite sure of the rules (if there are any) so feel free to bring me up to speed. Updates will be at whatever pace is fun/doable for me, interactions, asks etc. always very much appreciated 💚

@goodomensafterdark @daneecastle @gleafer @gahellhimself-blog @vavoom-sorted-art @kotias

I will put appropriate content tags on every chapter and make a masterpost once I have a handful of posts. Please keep in mind that this series is going to deal with a heavy dose of unreality, self-injurious behaviour, substance abuse, erratic behaviour/mood swings, and more. There will be a happy ending.

Now, without further ado, the first instalment of what is going to be us following Crowley down the path of (hopefully temporary) insanity.

rest your head \\ chapter 1

(~800 w, no additional warnings)

Sleep deprivation, while usually not fatal, is not the least bit pleasant. Human brains require sleep to function—and not just their minds, either. The entire body breaks down oh so slowly as every system designed to keep it alive deteriorates without the comforting embrace of unconsciousness.

However, the actual cause of death is yet to be identified, and luckily Crowley's corporation functions on the principle of 'what it doesn't know won't kill it'.

Over the centuries, earthly indulgences have become more and more common, pleasures easily sought and found no matter where he went, although nothing ever beat a good night's (or decade's) rest. Sleep calms his mind and allows him to drift through time without a care, surrounded by ever-shifting dream clouds and the occasional vivid interference. In short, it takes away the pain, and Someone knows there is a lot to carry when he returns home for the first time in four years.

No dust had dared to settle on the furniture, and the familiar smell of damp earth welcomes him. Locking the door behind him, Crowley blindly finds his way through the corridors, kicking off his shoes as he goes and throwing his glasses onto the nearest surface. When he pushes into his bedroom, which is just as pristine as he had left it, the anger churning in his gut cools.

Home. Has he ever had a home? Once upon a time, maybe, before time had been born, surrounded by breathing nebulae and void, and then—

Eden. Him. Right, that's done.

A snap of his fingers and his clothes change into a set of silk pyjamas, the fabric brushing over his skin like liquid silver, and the black-out curtains snap shut. Darkvision is one of the advantages of being a demon, but he finds the dark has nothing to offer him today, so he closes his eyes and pulls back the sheets to curl around a pillow.

Images flicker in the pulsating emptiness left behind, piercing blue eyes and fluttering hands, a press of lips against his, words digging into his skull like tadpoles making a home within his brain matter. Electricity crawls over his slowly numbing body, urging him to disappear, to sink into nothingness and waste away until he is a dried stain on the mattress. 

No one will come looking for him, after all.

Maybe the world will be brighter once he wakes, the pain duller, the loneliness less aching and all-consuming. Within his chest bleeds a hollow, jagged wound, dripping black blood and drowning the radiant remnants of Aziraphale's presence; his essence is familiar, it's- home. 

Crowley does not need to sleep, yet somewhere between Rome and the present, he had forgotten about it, his corporation shifting and changing, craving rest and punishing him for its absence. It will not kill him, it does not even occur to him that it might, but there are countless fates worth than death and he is already living one of them. What's another added to the mess his life has become?

His nails dig into the pillow case, his consciousness choking on the scorched battlefield of the day, but no matter how hard he tries, how desperately he commands his body to bend to his wills, sleep refuses to come. A new, different kind of pain rises, worse than fatigue and infinitely more addictive. Its sting is battery acid on his tongue, infusing him with a restlessness that is scratching on his bones, and when blue irises keep mocking him behind closed lids, he forces his eyes open, turns onto his back, and stares at the ceiling, waiting.

Light wanders and shifts, barely visible through the heavy fabric adorning his windows, and it dips behind the horizon before reappearing on the other side. Crowley stares at white paint and counts the moving dots gradually clouding his vision, absently pressing his knuckles against his sternum over and over—whether to calm himself or to chase away mental pain with physical is beyond his awareness. 

Both, neither, maybe. 

His too-human body protests and whines, and once he begins to see blue shadows in his periphery, Crowley bites his tongue and gets up. Coffee will help, then a hot shower, and yelling his plants back into order is going to occupy most of his afternoon anyway, so what's a night without sleep?

The next one will bring him the rest he needs, and Aziraphale's eyes will stop striking him down whenever he blinks. He is alone now (alone in London, alone on earth, his chest constricts and twists at the thought, stealing his breath) and he will have to get used to it; it'll be fine eventually, right?

—

Three days later Crowley is staring at his bedroom ceiling, impatient, restless, exhausted, and attempting to chase away the bone-white teeth hovering underneath lightning-blue eyes.

"Fine, have it your way," he snaps eventually, his voice too loud in an empty room, and feels the smile breathing down his neck all the way to the kitchen.

[eevee-genshin-blog]

How’d This Happen?!

A/n: First Post! Please enjoy! This was inspired by @idkfitememate Boar!Creator!

I was floating... it’s dark? What..?

I was just playing Genshin Impact... Where am I now..? It’s getting cold... Huh... What’s that light? When you first woke up, you didn’t understand what was happening. But you got isekai’d into Genshin Impact, as a cat. 

You mostly looked like Luna from Sailor Moon... but your eyes. They were like a normal cat’s, but golden, and your pupils looked like Primogems. 

Great... You thought annoyed, you’ve read stories, some get cool powers, others get their phones... but you got a Cat! How unfair, but you choose to feel thankful, you didn’t know if their was anything to this place yet... 

They could have killed you for being an ‘ImPoStOr,’ you mentally mock the name... But you started to wonder and ended up cutting yourself.

Not gold blood. Not stary blood. Or pink blood. It looked like the Galaxy, the drops that lost contact with your skin floated up to the sky...

So... You were a god? How does that work? You were stuck in the form of a cat... So confusing... But you decided to wander around and learn.

=================================================

In the few weeks you’ve been here, you’ve found out the following.

One, the true “Impostor,” had descended here long ago.

Two, they weren’t an animal.

Three, you did, in fact, have a human form, but felines are your ‘Symbolic Animals,’ odd, but you’ve always been a cat person. (You did figure out how to turn back into human, but you didn’t have clothes and turned right back into a cat.)

Four, you can control the different elements; So you decided to be chaotic and make a cat friendly base in the trees and ground so no one would find you.

Five, the mobs didn’t attack you.

So far, when someone’s seen you, you’d bolt. But now, you have a proper escape plan! So, you started working. Of course, you struggled, after all, you weren’t exactly used to being a cat yet, or using the elemental powers. But you managed. 

Thankfully, Tevyat helped you, making sure you found fresh and clean water; giving you cat-friendly fruits to eat, or letting you catch big fishes; making sure the waters were calm if you tried swimming; and the winds gently blew you dry after.

But after a few months, you made a very small cave system for cats, or bunnies now that you think of the size, to travel through. You didn’t fully understand Dendro enough to make a tree base.

More time passed, as you lived as a cat. You didn’t care to keep up a ‘good appearance,’ why should you? You’re a cat in the forests near Mondstadt, staying alive was more important for you.

Time actually was passing so fast because you were so used to your world’s time. So, you didn’t really eat or sleep like the others here. So before you could process, a year had gone by... 

You spend that time playing; chasing seelies, napping with slimes, and visiting some Melusines in Fontaine (Them not telling anyone your the Creator). Letting the hilichurls braid your now fluffy and long fur. 

And you were getting homesick; yes, you were having fun... But you missed your parents, your older brother, your friends... Hell! You missed school, as crazy as it sounds...

No one here called you by your name... No one looked at you... No one thought anything of you now... But it was your face and name being taken by that person... 

You shake yourself out of your thoughts, angrily... You didn’t like this as much as you thought you did... You enjoyed being free and not being hunted down... but you wanted to talk to people...

But you joined your favorite Hilichurl Camp, joining in with the fire dance. You were invested into the dance as you breathed Fireballs, of different shapes, into the night sky; Thankfully, not harming any trees, or wildlife.

But, barely missed the boy who was acting like a wolf-... Wait!?

Thanks for reading!! Sorry for my first post being so short, but updates will be slow... Once again, this was inspired by @idkfitememate please check them out!

[gooeyslime]

I will die on this hill but William Afton being a good dad would have worked so much better at making him feel realistic instead of becoming a cartoonishly evil man and honestly the juxtaposition of like, witnessing him kill a kid, dropping his cheerful Springbonnie act as he locks them in a room, just a cold glare as he kills them, making the player go "what a heartless monster... I feel so bad for his kids, having to deal with such a piece of shit" as we see him get out of the suit, cleaning up the blood and head home, as he opens the door once again we see his attitude change as he tells his kids "Dad's back home!" And we see them run up to him, Michael playing it cool bc he's an angsty teen but you see him smile as he points out he's late, you can tell they all care for him and got worried, after all there's a murderer on the loose and while they seem to target kids who knows? They could kill adults too... William smiles at them, genuinely, not like the smile he gave his victim whith his Springbonnie act, they all eat dinner together and if you hadn't just seen him kill a kid in cold blood you'd think this was a normal family, just a single dad eating and chatting with his kids... As he makes sure they are all sound asleep you see him walk into his bedroom, looking at a picture, it's a picture of all of them, smiling together, next to William is a woman and it dawns on you that she's nowhere to be seen and that she might be dead and he's trying to figure out how to bring her back by killing a bunch of random kids bc nothing can stand between William Afton and the only people he cares about, not even death itself... that stuff would make me way more scared of him than any "oh I am so smart I planned for you to try and set me on fire again so now if anyone scans my parts into a computer I can brainwash a random person and get them to rebuild myself ooooh I always come back!"

Like even showing him before he completely loses it would be terrifying, how he's just a normal guy who has his own troubles sure, but still isn't going around killing kids to study weird ghost stuff... Not yet anyway... And the the last straw happens and he falls to the deep end and you wonder, if you were in his shoes... If you lost the love of your life... And everyone just tells you life goes on and you just gotta get over it... What would you do? Would you also break? Would you go as far as killing someone in the hopes to bring her back? To put your family back together? And as you do that how would you handle your family breaking apart even further? Your daughter killed by YOUR machine, the machine you built to kill kids, the machine you desperately tried to keep her away from? Your older son acting out, angry because he couldn't handle his own sorrow at losing his sister shortly after his mom, he's falling apart just like you and in a moment of anger he ends up killing his younger brother, your other son killed because you couldn't see that your older son couldn't handle his own grief too? What would do then?

Stuff like that is utterly terrifying to think about... At least for me... Shame they made him so evil he's basically a Saturday morning cartoon villain now, he could have been so terrifying in so many ways but instead they made him an annoyance... Like even him coming back post Pizza Sim could have been terrifying if he wasn't such a joke by then, like we thought we finally defeated him but he's back, because he still hasn't done what he set out to do, put his family back together, and absolutely nothing can stop him from doing just that... Instead we get him showing up in 1 (one) ending and he's just... Walking around... Then he stares at a monitor and eventually he hacks Freddy by... Holding out his hand like he's using the force?? He doesn't even have a jumpscare either... I really hope the DLC at least gives him that bc him being threatening again is almost impossible after all the peepaw jokes people made...

Anyway I'm sure you can tell I have very strong feelings about this and so many thoughts for plot points that could be added to the lore if this was canon but I'll shut up for now before I write a whole essay lol

[popponn]

pretty boy. [chigiri hyoma x f!reader]

notes: a bit of cursings, unmentioned but post-canon aka pro-player!chigiri, pinning.

“You are prettier than me,” you bemoaned your fate to your pillow. From your side, Chigiri Hyoma didn’t even bother to sigh at your unimportant complains anymore.

Hidden from your eyes, Hyoma wondered if he should scold you or do something else. 10 years of friendship and 3 years of crushing—he still couldn’t really grasp the situation whenever you were like this. Two seconds and you were the sunshine of his life, then on a rare one second you kept screaming how his face was the reason no one on earth is pretty.

The fuck was he supposed to say to that?

He tried “Thanks.” When you were chill, you squealed and praised him even more and he became a mess of a goo as he tried to act cool. When you were like this, you cried for real thrice and he really didn’t need a fourth time.

He tried “Of course.” The normal response was to poke his cheek—which reddened in response much to your oblivious ass’ and his unfortunate ass’ charging. The this response would be a confusing session of skincare steps tutorial followed with more whining.

Other responses too produced similar result. Either his crush acted up like some chronic back pain or whatever spirit possessing you became the bane of Hyoma’s existence which is a big fuck not again no matter how much affection he hold for you.

(Also, good God, somehow the latter made him felt miserable because while overcoming a fatal, life-changing injury is possible for him of course making progression in his love life from the goddamn friendzone is impossible.)

(Every celebration night, his whole fucking team poked him to death with that fact. Bitch.)

As those terrible recollection went through his mind, Hyoma jokingly wondered if this time he should actually grew a spine and be a man who charged at everything recklessly.

Which he did, because as Chigiri Hyoma had realized—

He is an impatient dumbass. Might as well shut down his brain for a moment and follow his ego out of field for once.

“Hey,” Hyoma called your name.

“Hm?” you turned your head slightly from the—holy shit seriously—tear soaked pillowcase. Hyoma’s pillowcase. Hyoma sharpened his eyes at that realization, but as of the moment he was a man on a mission.

Gently, Hyoma brought his face closer to you. You, as usual, didn’t gave him even a blink of nervousness even as heat crept up to his cheeks.

(Your heart beat faster. You silently asked if Hyoma would ever realize what being close to him does to you. But, out of respect, out of affection, and out of many things—you said nothing.)

“You do realize you are pretty, right?” Hyoma asked, his eyes looking straight at yours.

(You forced a pout, trying to hide the overwhelming, bubbling feelings inside the cavity of your heart.)

“You are just saying that, pretty princess!” you protested, pushing your face closer to him. Out of habit, Hyoma realized, and yet it still did things to him. Fuck his highschooler-in-love ass.

Hyoma raised an eyebrow. Through sheer determination and lovesickness, he pressed his forehead to yours, “Am I now?”

“Yeah,” you said, sniffing. “You are handsome, too. Unfair. So unfair.”

Hyoma pursed his lips. He could end this with a kiss and risked it all. Or he could get to the point on confess. Or he could chicken out for another year.

(A part of you wanted to risk it all and kiss him. But, you were a chicken who hold a crush for 13 years in its beak—)

But, in the end, he might have loved you too much to risk it all.

(—like a professional and trained clown, you held the urge in.)

Hyoma drew his face away from yours, “You are pretty too, dumbass. If it’s between us, it’s fair.”

You—who definitely, yet again, didn’t realize the blazing blushes on his cheeks—blinked in confusion, “…really?”

You are a dumbfuck—Chigiri Hyoma noted affectionately. He will be in love for an eternity and he is just as dumb for thinking it wouldn’t be so bad.

Bitterly, Hyoma smiled at that.

(You wanted to blurt out to your long time friend that his smile was the dearest thing on earth.)

“At least,” Hyoma began. “You are the prettiest girl on earth for me.”

Once again, dumbly, you blinked. Hyoma saw speck of red on your cheeks—mirroring his—before you immediately hid behind his pillow again.

Then, like a hint of happy ending—whispering, almost like a dream—he heard you reply, “…yeah, you too.”

Under the sunset, with a voice that could only be heard by him who sat mere inches away from you, you continued.

“I love you, Hyoma.”

(Hyoma knew his teammates would never let him hear the end of it if they knew you confessed first.)

(But, hey, the chicken is fucking dead and he is certain he could win a bar fight if its for the sake of his and your honor.)

“…yeah, love you too.”

[mdhwrites]

You said the arcs of certain characters in TOH have an 'Us vs. Them mentality.' I take it that's because, as you say, the narrative pins the bad qualities of certain characters on separate parties (e.g. "Amity's flaws are only because of her mom"), but would you care to elaborate further on said mentality and how it sticks out to you in TOH?

So shockingly, not really. It plays into it but I am actually inherently talking about the same sort of mentality that Belos perpetuates but back onto Luz. After all, if you look at the main cast by even mid season 2 we have a problem forming. Eda: Has lost her criminal edge, has no personal interests, is defined by being nice in a way befitting Luz's worldview. Momma Eda.

Amity: No longer is studious and hard working but instead focuses more on her girlfriend and her nerdy interests. Is also now just nice. Was only shown genuine care by Luz, instead of just trying to fulfill her nerdy desires, once she finds out Amity is into Azura.

Lilith: Has turned into a nerd and given up on any ambitions that had led to her previous actions, becoming a nice cool aunt. Only now has Luz tried to form any relationship with her (admittedly, she didn't get many chances before now).

Hunter: Has only been being given kindness because he has shown a capacity for kindness that Luz only really started showing him, beyond not wanting him to die, once he showed he had a nerdy interest in wild magic.

Gus: Was a nerd from go and always nice, even if he could be slightly selfish.

Willow: By mid S2, is essentially out of the show for the past half season, has never had a strong personality and is just nice. Yes, she'll start her jock stuff soon... And never have a real conversation with Luz again, at least not until S3 maybe? So a full season where Luz and Willow, after Willow might have stopped being nerdy/an outcast, where Luz doesn't have an interest in her anymore.

And uh, just as a reminder to S3, Hunter gains a scifi interest post redemption and Luz explicitly listens to NOTHING her mother says to her during her big speech in For the Future until she reveals herself to be a secret nerd. At that point, suddenly Luz dials in.

For TOH, a show supposedly about the individual and self expression, characters either lose their personality and/or gain the personality that matches LUZ. There is less character variety in interests and personalities than even 90s cartoons much of the time by the end of TOH because these characters all lose so much of themselves fitting in with the good guys, especially the redeemed ones.

This is where your argument for this does come into play. I'll frame it as the fandom likes to with Amity: "She didn't have Luz in her life yet."

Amity is only a bitch while she is hanging out with the wrong crowd. Socialites, those with ambition and jocks. The Luz enters her life and despite the fact that the ONE time Luz ever calls Amity out for being a bitch being when Amity is being a bully to King and clearly trying to get a rise out of Luz, making that moment meaningless, that simple fact starts warping Amity. Starts making her turn back to her good, nerdy side. And because this is such an inherently good thing, there is no difficulty in doing this. She needs no motivation, no calling out, nothing. She just needs to desire to be like Luz/liked by Luz. She can discard her entire friend group and do things that should get her disowned with how evil Odalia is and face zero consequences because... I guess that's the power of becoming a nerd.

You are beyond reproach. You can only do good. Same goes for Hunter. Despite YEARS of potential propaganda and the like, Luz just getting into his life and admittedly jabbing at Belos/him a little, is all it takes for him to embrace the inherent goodness, displayed by his nerdiness about wild magic, and start becoming a better person. For this, he loses his home but that is only seen as a positive because indeed, he got away from those hostile that made him a bad person. He could now be a good person because he no longer had those influences and could embrace Luz's way of life.

With the show's themes, why is this the case? Shouldn't their base personalities be allowed to exist? Shouldn't a wide range of ideologies and the like be allowed since that is a part of self expression? Instead, when people don't like Luz approves, they are disapproved by Luz and either need to get the fuck out or conform.

And this is all without getting into how she becomes Jesus in the last episode...

None of this is intentional but if someone told me that the show felt hostile to them because they didn't consider themselves a nerd or because they tried to get somewhere in life, I wouldn't blame them. The show has a weirdly narrow belief in who is a good person. Who is allowed to exist in the main cast, a problem that cascades issues into a lot of its themes. I mean, this is the first show I've ever had to ask if character arcs are actually hurt the themes of the show because of this, a blog I sadly couldn't refind.

There is admittedly an element of this where I might not have thought about it without the fandom. Most people I know who are multi-fandom still agree that TOH is aggressive against others, even for a fandom. That it lashes out and blames others for its problems. Almost like a *gestures at the thesis*

And that doesn't help make any of this be less uncomfortable unfortunately. See you next tale.

======+++++======

I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

[manofbeskar]

Okay, I am interested in your Dracule Uta posts now. (She's just so cute and I just know he embroidered that flower on her onesie!!) I need to know more!!

I don't have too much details yet but this is what I have for now:

While Shanks finds her in a treasure chest after raiding another crew, Mihawk instead finds her after killing some marines and discovering her on their ship, eating a devil fruit. He figures the Marines probably don't have good intentions for her so he takes her with him.

For the first few days/weeks, he tries to find another home for her. He thinks his life as a marine hunter and lone pirate is too dangerous to care for an infant. A bit of a Buddy Daddies thing in that way, that he's too dangerous to be around and frankly doesn't want the responsibility.

When he finds out which devil fruit she ate (still the Sing-Sing fruit), he realises he can't risk her falling into the hands of someone more corrupt who can manipulate her powers. He decides to go all in and try his best to raise her properly.

He goes to Shanks for help. He himself never had good parents, but he knows Shanks had a good relationship with Roger and his crew also has older men who may have advice to offer. He gets closer to the RHP this way, learning from them how to best care for a baby.

Shanks grows close to Uta. He likes that her hair makes her look like his and Mihawk's baby. He also treats her like she is their kid, always accidentally calls himself her father. Uta also thinks of him like that. Similar to Buddy Daddies again, Mihawk and Shanks both acknowledge they have parental roles in her life but, at this point in time, don't view themselves as romantic co-parents.

(Of course, they have feelings for each other but Mihawk is oblivious to his feelings and Shanks is secretly crushing hard. He loves how good Mihawk is with the kid and how hard he's trying)

Shanks likes to bribe Uta with sweets to talk him up to Mihawk. Always backfires on him because she's way too frank about it (learned that from Mihawk). She'll just say shit like, "Mihawk, Shanks told me he wants to kiss you!" and it embarrasses Shanks every time.

Uta loves being carried by Mihawk. He carries and controls Yoru so easily. Even teen Uta is practically weightless in his arms. It reminds her of when he first found her and rocked her in his arms as they rode his boat back to his home.

Uta sees Mihawk and Shanks's feelings for each other grow over the years until on her 12th birthday she told them to get a grip and go out already. They went out and have been together ever since.

Mihawk and Shanks figured out a co-parenting arrangement a few years before Shanks docked at Windmill Village. Mihawk thinks it will be good for Uta to go sailing with Shanks every once in a while as his experiences sailing with him have always ended with fun stories and meeting new people.

Mihawk wants Uta to get out there and appreciate the world's vastness. He often takes her sailing (if she isn't sailing with Shanks) and shows her all his favourite spots. Sometimes Shanks comes along and tells her stories of "that time me and Mihawk came here ourselves and this really cool thing happened"

Mihawk let Shanks take Uta for longer than before when he docked at Windmill Village as he wanted Uta to make long-term friends that weren't twice her age like himself and the RHP, so she still meets Luffy. While he is a loner, he wants Uta to experience everything and meet people from all walks of life so she can figure out exactly who she wants to be.

Mihawk trained her to be a strong swordswoman since young. She's very skilled with the blade but told him she wanted to be a singer. Mihawk supports her preference and is happy to listen to all her new songs. As he strived to be the greatest swordsman when he was young, he now wants to help Uta become the greatest musician. He tunes in for every broadcast she does and makes sure the RHP catches them too. Uta still cares a lot about her swordsmanship and practices it often to stay sharp.

She carried a bamboo sword as a kid, then got Shanks's old one with the red hilt as a hand-me-down when she was 15. For her 18th birthday, Mihawk had a Yoru-inspired blade crafted for her. She named it "Musica". It looks similar to Yoru but the orbs are red and heart-shaped, the blade isn't black, and it's shorter.

She lives at Kuraigana with Mihawk but splits her time between there and wherever Shanks is. When Perona moved in, they became close friends. Perona loves hearing about her Mihawk stories. She also regularly duels with Zoro when he moves in, insists he doesn't stand a chance against Mihawk if he can't even beat his first student.

Uta's favourite colour is teal because it's the colour Yoru's blade shines.

Her eyes have rings as Mihawk also taught her powerful observation haki (I don't know if the rings are directly relevant to that but I like how the rings look on her)

[babydollmarauders]

MEDIA MANAGEMENT — NJ DEVILS (PART TWO)

one — two

y/ndevils00

liked by jackhughes, dawson1417, and 14,971 others

y/ndevils00 hi and welcome back to my channel! this evening we’re going to be discussing the njdevils loss against the minnesotawild so buckle in because this was a very (un)eventful night!

there was one (1) goal made tonight by our pretty boys in red, however Timo told me my skirt was ugly yesterday, so he’s been kicked off of this post! will he redeem himself by the time they play on friday? that depends on if he listens to my demands!

onto the boys who actually made it on the post: jackson tried his hardest but despite that, he did not make a goal 💔 he did however look miserable (see slide 1), spend an insane amount of time watching baby sensory videos on the ipad (see slide 6), get knocked down (see slide 8), and then finally look cool for once in his life (see slide 9)!

swiss rap god got an assist on the only goal of the night, got in a scrum (see slide 7), and looked absolutely traumatized by something on the bench (see slide 2)! i’m not sure what he’s seen in his life but i’d like for him to keep it to himself :)

the crowned king of sweden, jesper bratt, also made an assist on tonight’s goal AND looked adorable and smiled after his own failed goal <3

maraschino cherry did absolutely nothing of note tonight but that’s better than getting a penalty (*cough* tuna *cough*)! so, i took a pic of him smoldering! you look great, zoolander!

and finally, mercy me was actually a sweet little angel tonight who can do absolutely no wrong and who definitely 100% did not pay me at all ever to say any of this!

i hope you all enjoyed tonight’s game because i know i didn’t!

tagged jackhughes, nicohischier, jesperbratt, john.marino97, dawson1417 and njdevils

jackhughes why do you do this to me?

y/ndevils00 i have no idea what you’re talking about

jackhughes also what the hell are baby sensory videos?

y/ndevils00 don’t act like you don’t know, jackson

jackhughes not my name

sharangovich17 they’re videos of bright colored dancing fruits and vegetables over a black screen

jackhughes @/sharangovich17 why do you know this?

y/ndevils00 he has a baby, jackson. unlike some other people on this team 👀

jackhughes still not my name and you still shouldn’t be a mother yet

y/ndevils00 YOU SAID “YET”!

john.marino97 dear god, hughesy what have you done?

john.marino97 not only are you still calling me a cherry, but i’m zoolander now too?

y/ndevils00 this is correct

y/ndevils00 i also complimented you, what do you have to say for yourself?

john.marino97 i don’t know if this warrants a thank you

y/ndevils00 well you just said it, so i’m taking it. you’re welcome! 🤭

john.marino97 idk how he puts up with you

y/ndevils00 if you ever find out, let me know!

user54 omg 4/9 pictures being of jack, their comments about kids, marino hinting at her dating someone?! it’s so obviously jack!

user26 idk, the way she posts about him makes it seem like they’re just good friends

nicohischier i’m honestly not sure what i’m supposed to say to this

nicohischier thank you? i think?

y/ndevils00 you’re so welcome swiss cheese 🤠

nicohischier i take it back

nicohischier we’re no longer friends

y/ndevils00 it’s too late, you signed a blood oath to be my friend forever, remember?

nicohischier ahh is that what i signed when you joined the team? i thought it was the standard NDA

dawson1417 “give me 5 more bucks and i’ll make sure no one knows you paid me for a slide” WHAT IS THIS Y/N/N?!

y/ndevils00 hey! i SAID you didn’t pay me! you just exposed yourself merc-dog

dawson1417 sure, i’m the one who exposed me!

dawson1417 and did you just call me “mercy me”?

user38 her and jack are dating, for sure. barely trying to hide it at this point

jesperbratt i am not the crowned king of sweden, but i appreciate your sentiments y/n!

y/ndevils00 you are the goodest boy of all the boys

jackhughes do i mean nothing to you?

y/ndevils00 @/jackhughes shhh grownups are talking now

tmeier96 “y/n’s list of demands: bring me an iced coffee, tell me my skirt is pretty and you were lying, convince HIM to let me get a cat, tell nico that swiss cheese IS a cool nickname and that he’s wrong and stupid, get me a blanket because this stupid rink is cold and i hate it here.”

y/nonthegram you have to do them all by thursday. good luck and may the odds be ever in your favor!

jackhughes she’s not getting a cat

trevorzegras @/jackhughes did you let her watch hunger games again after the fire incident?

y/ndevils00 @/trevorzegras it was one little fire! i hardly think it warrants the banishment of all the movies forever!

trevorzegras @/y/ndevils00 you tried to make your own fire dress and nearly burned down the lake house

y/ndevils00 @/trevorzegras big talk coming from the guy who helped me

jackhughes @/trevorzegras you WHAT?

user78 DID JACK JUST CONFIRM THEY’RE DATING?!

user19 AND TREVOR?!

trevorzegras hey! i know that ipad kid!

jackhughes don’t encourage her z

[eemamminy-art]

not obligated to answer this but if you have anymore thoughts about alex sdv (or stardew valley at all) please share. i am obsessed with alex

Oh hell yeah anon you've activated my current hyperfixation 😁 I have a google doc where I'm dropping my headcanons and a bulleted timeline for a Alex/m!farmer longfic I've been writing in my head that's up to about 13 pages now ahaha so here's a few things!!

When he first moved to Pelican Town he was actually really quiet and reserved because he was still grieving heavily, so he never really got close to the other kids. He talks about how he played gridball with his mom so I think once he got the chance to play that in school (in another town no doubt) I think he came out of his shell then and made some friends, but all those friends lived far enough away that after graduating high school he's been pretty lonely and never could connect with the other people his own age in town.

He never goes into the saloon to my knowledge prior to the 10-heart event dinner scene, so I headcanon that it's because he doesn't drink alcohol and doesn't want the temptation to try it. I don't remember if it's said explicitly but I got the impression his dad's abuse stemmed from being drunk so I imagine Alex refuses to touch the stuff out of both principle and fear of becoming like his father one day.

I said it in another post but I headcanon him as gay and suffering comphet. He's built himself up as this cool popular guy, so he tries to emulate the sexist straight guys he's seen in movies but there's absolutely nothing behind it. He says something rude to a girl and then is like uhhh (shit what now) bye! 😅 I want to think that in getting to know the farmer he not only does away with that facade but also gets more comfortable in his sexuality!!

and on a sidenote to the above: I hc most of the town as gay or bi and I am toying with the idea of Abby being transfem! Sam/Seb is a given, and maaaybe they're in a poly relationship with Abby but I'm still undecided!! I like Maru/Penny as a concept but need to marinate on that a bit more, I see them always sitting together and it makes me happy but I need to think more on how they met and what their relationship would be like. I don't have anything solid yet in terms of other characters' gender or sexuality headcanons exactly, other than Caroline and Jodi being bi and desperately yearning to run away together 🥰

But back to Alex!! With how his storyline goes of trying to impress others with his jock persona, then trying to switch gears and be super booksmart, I headcanon that he gets close to the farmer via the farmer tutoring him so he can take a community college placement test. :3 My thought for why he's in the rut he's in is that he wanted to play college gridball but his grades in high school were so bad he has done nothing with himself since graduation and has just been stagnating and becoming more and more bitter (which only amps up his shitty attitude when the player first meets him). So trying to get educated is doubly good for him because he can work toward his sports dream (in a way) and try to impress the farmer. Though of course, the thing that brings them closer is Alex learning to be true to himself 😊

This is getting long, so last thing: he's actually a really well-rounded homemaker but does not even think about it really. George has been disabled for a long time, so all of the handy work around the house has to be handled by Alex, and he's so eager to help out his grands. :3 They put a roof over his head so of course he'll climb up onto it to fix the leaks when it rains! Evelyn is always cooking and baking and Alex is so soft for his granny he has been in the kitchen helping her for as long as he's lived with them, so he's actually got a real talent for cooking and baking too! One of the first things he learned after moving in with them was the proper way to set a table, and the best way to wash dishes efficiently. He's spent enough time at Haley's house having no chemistry with the poor girl, but found Emily's whole sewing setup really fascinating and she taught him to mend the holes in his letterman jacket when he asked so he knows how to hand sew! These are all skills that he has but doesn't recognize as skills, he just inherently has this desire to help the people in his life so he picks up this and that to make it easier!

Anyway! Thank you for letting me ramble 😄 Alex is really sweet and soft underneath the mask he wears, and he's been rotating in my head for the last few months hehe

I had bought sdv when it came out but barely touched it, and started it up again on a whim earlier this year and I'm so glad I did!! I really adore the game and it's bringing me a lot of joy currently 🥺

[bl00dst41ned]

*.·:·.✦ my little secret (jude bellingham ‘series’ pt.3) ✦.·:·.*

pairing: jude bellingham x female oc (Mariah)

summary: in which Jude tries to do right but has to face his past actions

author's note: part 3 is out, part 4 on friday. masterlist here. tag list: @barcagirly @everlyjay @alwaysclassyeagle @urmotheris (if you want to be tagged, drop it wherever you want: post, repost, in my asks or comments)

series masterlist

word count: 909

4:12 PM

As minutes passed, Jude grew more and more nervous. He and Mariah had arranged to meet at a dessert shop at 4PM, after having a conversation through Instagram. He sensed how she still felt resentment, and he understood why. But he deeply wanted to do right and it started with apologizing in person. If she showed up.

Mariah was 12 minutes late and had not sent him any message. He just prayed she would show up.

His suffering was cut short by the bell ring of the door. Mariah appeared in the doorstep, still looking gorgeous in his eyes. His facial expression changed once he noticed the baby car seat she was pushing.

Jude definitely didn’t expect her to introduce them so quickly.

“Umm, hello” He got up to greet her, only to be ignored as she sat down and placed the car seat next to her. “Alright…”

“So” She started, her annoyance clearly heard. “What am I here for?”

“You might want to order something before- I’m cool, thank you”

Her tone was so soft yet her attitude was so harsh. Jude had hurted her deeply but it could not take away her softness.

“Okay…” said a distraught Jude. “First, how you been?”

“Jude, let’s not act like that” She instantly dodges his nice approach. “We’re here for Tami, right?”

He nodded in response, not letting out a word. He was scared to say the wrong thing.

“Tami is yours if this is what you wonder. I wanted to tell you immediately but someone decided to break my heart that night”

The last part of her sentence brought him back to that night. He remembered she did say she had to tell him something. He also remembered how disrespectful and rude he was towards her. How wrong he was. He could not feel anything else than remorse.

“Mariah, I’m sorry for the way I treated you”

Mariah expected him to apologize, but not genuine. As much as she did not want to believe him, she could only accept them, for the sake of her daughter.

“I appreciate you for that” She simply thanked “I can’t lie, that one hurted deeply but now that you’re here, I can’t take you away from Tami”

Jude saw in her response how much she grew from their relationship. She had became a mature woman who loved her child and was willing to keep thing in perspective for her. She impressed him and he regretted losing such an incredible person.

“Tami’s the apple of my eye.” Her tone got more serious at the mention of their baby. “If you promise to be there, do it”

Jude felt pressured by her words. He wanted to do good and repair his mistakes, hurting her being the biggest one.

“You hurted me, that was enough. Don’t do it to her”

“I’ll be the best, I promise” He looked straight in her eyes so she knew he meant it.

Just as they ended, little Tamara wailed in the car seat. Jude’s head snapped towards her. She had been silent all along, making him forget her presence. Her whines popped their bubble.

He watched Mariah get her in her hands, placing her in her arms. She gave the diaper bag to Jude, who hesitantly took it.

“Can you get me the bottle”

He did so, analyzing the content of the bag. He closed it and lifted her head, looking at Mariah and Tamara. 

The young mother’s soft moves, Tamara’s mouth movements as she ate, her hands trying to grip the bottle, the way they looked at each other, with so much love. The sight touched Jude straight in his heart. 

He suddenly felt like that’s what he wished forever. He wanted their daughter to look at him like that, to feel the love of a little human. He could only blame himself for it. He’s the one who first blocked her before she reciprocated the action. He messed up.

Mariah smirked noticing Jude’s face expression. She didn’t think he’d have matured after a year but was surprised. Seems like they both grew better people apart. Maybe they weren’t meant to be together.

Once Tami finished eating, Mariah burped her before placing her back in her arms. She looked back at Jude, whose eyes still haven’t moved from the baby.

“You wanna hold her?”

“Ye-yeah” He stuttered out of nervousness.

She got up, and went to his side.

“Place your arms like me”

He obeyed and Mariah placed Tami in his arms, making sure her neck was secured.

His eyes met his daughter’s, who looked back between him and her mother. Once Mariah went back to sit, she settled them on him. Jude’s eyes had diverted on her entire face, taking in her features. Her little hair was starting to curl. Her hands were constantly opening and closing as if she tried to grip something.

Jude’s body stiffed as soon as she started stir in his arms. Mariah let out a little chuckle, looking at the scene.

“Don’t worry, she won’t fall” She reassured with a smile on her face. “Long as you got her, it’s all good”

Though she was just talking about that moment, her words made Jude think. He had missed enough time, he needed to be there now. As long as he kept up with his promise, the three of them would be alright. Long as he got her, it’s all good

like and repost for support (hope you liked it)

masterlist for more

[generouskittentidalwave]

LMK FANDOM I AM GRABBING YOU BY THE THROAT AGAIN ONCE MORE BECAUSE APPARENTLY YOU GUYS CAN'T LEARN YOUR LESSON AFTER THE FIRST GO AROUND.

LISTEN CLOSE AS NOW I NEED TO GET THIS 0UT THERE AS WELL

TRIPITAKA WAS *NOT* AN ABUSER FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE

I CAN'T BELIEVE I ACTUALLY HAVE TO *SIT* HERE AND TYPE OUT A POST FOR THIS

Look, listen up for those of you who like to skip your way into assumption station to hop on the fill your angsty desires train, let me be the railway closing sign for you for a moment here.

TRIPITAKA CARED FOR WUKONG JUST AS MUCH AS WUKONG CARED FOR HIM.

Oh my god, shocker! I know!/s

Tripitaka, this cool yet cowardly and sensitive fella was the one tasked with putting the circlet on Wukong because he had no power to STOP him, like at all. That circlet was the only thing Tripitaka had that, and I can't believe I have to even say this, DID NOT CONTROL WUKONG, but was able to keep him from harming others. The circlet, when the tightening spell was said, would enclose around his head causing him great head pain. This was used for when he did something bad or if he needed to be stopped from killing someone because he was a wild monkey with no understanding of human morals yet that did not know any better that was given SO MUCH POWER to the point that the circlet was the ONLY thing able to keep him reigned in if he went wild, especially sense the monk was powerless to stop him himself. AND HERE'S THE REAL KICKER, THE MONK EVEN TRIED TO TAKE IT OFF DURING THEIR JOURNEY AND COULDN'T, NO MATTER HOW HARD HE TRIED.

Did the monk sometimes make a mistake or two with the circlet on occasion? Yes. Did he sometimes make a mistake in general? Yes. Did he do that intentionally? NO. It's called being human, it's called not being perfect, but that didn't make him any less of a good guy. AND WUKONG CARED FOR HIM WITH EVERY FIBER OF HIS BEING NOT BECAUSE THE "CIRCLET WAS MAKING HIM" BUT BECAUSE TRIPITAKA WAS HIS FIRST REAL FRIEND THAT GENUINELY CARED ABOUT HIM TO HELP HIM ON A GOOD PATH. WUKONG WAS GIVEN MANY CHANCES TO LEAVE AND NOT COME BACK DURING THE JOURNEY, BUT HE CAME BACK ANYWAY FOR THE SOLE PURPOSE OF HELPING HIS FRIENDS. FOR HELPING THE MONK. EACH AND EVERY TIME.

TRIPITAKA FOUND WUKONG, BAJIE, WUJING, THREE CREATURES WHO HE GAVE A CHANCE TO BECOME BETTER AND THEY ALL LOVED HIM ALL THE MORE FOR IT. Tripitaka gave them a chance to be the good people that they could be. He helped bring them all together. Together, he made them all a family. Wukong sees them all as his family. They are his family.

Neither Wukong or Tripitaka were perfect, they made mistakes, the two had their arguments here and there, but none of that was ever able to shake their relationship. Never. With every argument that seperated them, Wukong always came back and the two apologized. Wukong always chose to stay by Tripitaka's side. He chose to be, dare I say it, Tripitaka's BEST friend.

He was not his slave, he was not treated as an attack dog. Macaque said it himself, Wukong and the others were on a path of self destruction, himself and the brotherhood included, and it was Tripitaka who helped Wukong, Bajie, and Wujing onto a good path. It was Tripitaka that brought them together and showed them what it truly means to have not just friends, but a family.

Before this Wukong had Azure who basically pushed his own thoughts on the celestial rule onto Wukong which kept fuelling him up for something that he shouldn't have been, Peng, Yellow Tusk, and DBK did the same thing, up until they left Wukong after the war was lost and he got imprisoned. Macaque followed Wukong and supported him in something that he shouldn't have despite expressing his concerns towards it before again, just like the others, abandoning him once the battle was lost and Wukong got imprisoned. Wukong was surrounded with people in his life who were not very good people. But Tripitaka was NOT like them. He didn't fuel Wukong with his own desires, he didn't follow him only to leave when the tide's turned. He taught him about morals, helped teach him the many things he knew that helped Wukong become a better person rather than purposely straying him from it. He gave him care, appreciation, genuine kindness, and true friendship. And the other three in the group showed him true friendship as well.

Tripitaka was Wukong's truest oldest friend, his teacher, and his master. They were inseparable and always will be, even if he can't be with Wukong in person anymore. Wukong cares for Tripitaka deeply and Tripitaka cares deeply for Wukong, and no amount of the fandom being the fandom is EVER going to change that.

[bebsibby]

The Top Surgery Log

Hello! I got top surgery yesterday! I want to catalogue my experience so I can remember it and provide some insight for people who want it but haven't gotten it yet. I will continue to update this post as my healing goes on. Everything under the read more!

Leading Up

My insurance is with Kaiser which has been an AWESOME experience so far. They do require a therapist letter, so no informed consent, but the process was very simple and there were a lot of people dedicated to getting me what I needed.

I had about 3 therapist meetings where she just asked me questions about my experience with gender and how my transition has gone so far, my support network, can I afford it, etc. Then she wrote my letter, sent it off to the surgical team, and I was approved within a few days!

After that I had my very first consult with the surgeon. He took pictures, did a breast exam, asked about general health and family health history, then gave me a little presentation of the process. It had post up photos of prior patients, a lot of explanations of the types of surgeries available that he does, and a lot of good information in general. He answered a lot of my questions and made me feel fully confident and prepared for the experience.

Also important to note: I told him the surgery I had been wanting ever since I started doing top surgery research was Inverted-T and I was curious of he knew of it/why that WASN'T an option they offered. He explained everything to me and showed me what he expected my results to look like if I DID want to go to a different surgeon outside of Kaiser. Said surgeon does NOT accept insurance, but would work with the insurance side of things to make sure they would reimburse for the expenses. I really appreciate that because it showed me they wanted to do get exactly what I wanted.

Based on all of that, I decided to just opt for Double Incision both to save me time and get a result that was aesthetically more pleasing to me. Loss of nipple sensation is unfortunate, but apparently IT only has the potential to bring a little sensation back, which wasn't worth all the extra hoop jumping for me.

After this consult, my surgeon told me to think about everything then email him a few days later with my decision. I did and then a few days later got my call to schedule. I got to pick my date but not the time of day, as I would later learn that's decided by the hospital and not me. Once my surgery was scheduled, another pre-op appointment was scheduled about a month before the surgery date. That appointment was very short, as it was just signing consent forms and confirming everything I wanted. He also gave me a packet of supplies I needed to get before the surgery.

After that, I'd occasionally receive emails with more pre-op instructions, like when to stop eating and drinking, showering instructions, when to stop certain medication, and how to care for my drains.

The Surgery

The day before surgery I had initially planned to do all of the last minute housework and leave for the surgery the next morning. HOWEVER, when I got my call to tell me the time, it turns I had to be there by 6 AM! The surgery center is over an hour away from me and the bus my wife and I were going to take didn't run that early, so we had to scramble to make other plans. Luckily the friend who was going to drive us back home was cool with us crashing on his floor for the night, so we were able to do the most important things at home then take the bus down the day before.

Once we were all set up for the night, I did the first cleaning routine that I was required to do, set my alarm, then tried to sleep. I didn't get much due to Hard Floor and also excited but that wasn't a biggie because I'd be sleeping again soon LOL.

Next morning I woke up, did my second skin cleansing, and we headed out! I checked in, waited a little in the waiting room, then got called back to start.

Everyone who was working with me was SUPER funny and kind. I got asked more questions, signed another form, took some pre-med tylenol, them stripped to switch into my gown, bonnet, and grippy socks (Got to keep those btw :>) My IV got put in my wrist which REALLY fucking hurt!!!!!! It never stopped aching. After that, the surgeon popped in to check on me and see if I had any questions, then they wheeled me in to the operating room.

I had gotten another premed via IV that was already making me tired, and I remember the last thing being the surgeon saying what to do with my removed tissue once he was done and I was gone!

The surgery itself lasted around four hours, but all I remember is waking up and seeing my wife and friend sitting at the foot of the bed. I said hi to them and that was apparently third time I had said it. I had been up and talking to them for awhile all loopy but also becoming suddenly very serious when talking with the nurses. I've had a few surgeries but I've NEVER been this way after so that was funny. The nurse had also been giving ME all of the postop discharge info and I don't remember it so thats unfortunate! I only remember her talking about the drains. I had to read it all again when I got home but it was all good.

Once I was awake enough, they wheel-chaired me down to my friends car, packed us all up and we headed back home. I napped about half the time but still kept my eyes closed when i was awake and talking bc my vision was still FUCKED and it was so bright out. We got home, I was lead inside, and that was that pretty much! I napped several more times, nibbled on some roast beef, emptied my drains (which made me very woozy, mostly due to the standing) and went to bed!

After Surgery

Day one! I woke up a few times in the night mainly to go to the bathroom, but slept REAL deep otherwise. It rained all night which was awesome. I woke up feeling very achy but not painful except for my throat. Those ET tubes are NOT easy on your body. Took all my meds, got out of bed eventually, and had cup ramen for breakfast. Now I'm just sitting on the couch with all my computer stuff moved from my desk to where I'm sitting. I got a long hdmi cable so I can just watch stuff on the big TV so I'm pretty set up!

My wife just brought me some cookies and overall I'm just feeling really good. Not really excited or emotional about it. Its just a very warm contented feeling.

I don't know what my chest looks like yet since my post-op binder got put on while i was still out, but everything gets removed next week! I'll probably update again after that appointment.

Feel free to ask specific questions! I'll be resting most of the time so I'll just be around!

[mah-t-wordblog]

hello. If requests are open then can I request ler/lee switch for Genya, Tanjiro and Muichirou please? Thanks! And no problem if you're not accepting prompts at the moment.

Heeeeey! I wrote it a few days ago and simply forgot to post it 😅 I hope you like it

An epic fight

Switch: Genya Shinazugawa, Tanjiro Kamado and Muichiro Tokito

❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜❤️🧡

Ships: NONE

Warnings: This is a tickle fic, if you don’t like it, just scroll down

This fanfic is originally in Portuguese, my English is translated using an automatic translator, if there are any big errors you can tell me so I can fix them

❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜❤️🧡

���Woohoo! Fight! Fight" Muichiro exclaimed

Genya and Tanjiro were standing facing each other, while Muichiro was sitting and watching.

Genya had a serious expression with his arms crossed, while Tanjiro smiled at the other.

“Come on Genya! Come!"

“That’s idiotic…” Genya rolled his eyes

"Why? Are you afraid of losing a tickle fight to me?”

So... to make a long story short, it seems that Muichiro was very bored today and decided to bother Genya and Tanjiro, somehow he made the two of them fight and decide to resolve everything in a harmless fight, a tickle fight, and lucky Muichiro became the judge

"Let's go! Start!” The boy exclaimed

Genya was “thinking this was stupid”, but realized it was real when Tanjiro jumped on top of him and tried to grab him.

“I’m good at this” Tanjiro said laughing “I was once a big brother”

“Don’t think you’re the only one”

Genya fought back but so far neither of them have managed to touch each other

But Genya jumped on top of Tanjiro and finally managed to throw him to the ground, quickly starting to tickle the other's belly.

“I won” Genya said

“No, you haven’t won, it’s not over yet” Muichiro came close and said “I need to check to see if it’s a valid victory”

Tanjiro rolled his eyes as he laughed at Muichiro's excuse, who only really wanted to help.

The youngest squeezed the redhead's legs

“THAHAT’S NOHOHOT FAHAHAIR”

“All’s fair in war” Genya laughed “that’s you complaining because you lost to me”

“Let’s see if he can handle it! 1… 2…” if Muichiro counted to 5 the victory was Genya’s “3… that’s really cool” the boy laughed

“Keep counting!”

Tanjiro was trying hard to get Genya off of him.

“4…”

In one jump, Tanjiro turned Genya around and ended up sitting on his waist, the dark-haired boy didn't understand anything and was a little confused.

“Haha! It looks like the tables have turned!”

“Oh! A surprising turn of events! Now that’s a fight” Muichiro celebrated

Tanjiro had more skills than Genya in a tickle fight, he grabbed one of the other's arms and raised it to attack him better

“FUHUHUHUHUHUHUCK”

“Who’s going to win now?” Tanjiro laughed

"Cool! Let's see if he can really handle it” Muichiro looked like a child excited about the fight, he ran to help Tanjiro and started stroking Genya's belly

“GEHEHET OHOHOF MEHEHE”

"Why? You will lose?" Tanjiro teased

“1… 2… 3… 4…”

Genya was nervous about losing and built up the strength to play the other two boys

"Hey!" Tanjiro shouted, rolling on the ground and standing up again “how much strength huh?”

He jumped on top of the dark-haired boy

"Haha ha! I am much stronger than you”

The two were grabbing each other and really wanted to win, but they started to hear giggling from someone else on the other side of the room, they both stopped and stared at Muichiro.

“It’s just that your fighting is funny” the boy continued laughing

The other two looked at each other and laughed

“You like to laugh, don’t you?” Tanjiro said approaching

“You deserve a reason to laugh”

The two jumped on top of the smaller one and attacked him together, the three boys made a big mess

Muichiro was the one who suffered this time, feeling the fierce tickles everywhere.

“NOHOHOHOHOHOHO”

“The fight was between the two of us, why did you get involved?” Genya said laughing and ruffling the boy's long hair.

“SOHOHOHOHOHOHORRY”

“Poor guy, he’s more sensitive than us Genya, leave him alone” Tanjiro asked but didn’t stop his own hands

“But he laughed at me”

“I’M SOHOHORRYHY” the youngest hit Genya trying to save himself

“Okay, okay”

The two older ones let go of the other and let him breathe.

"Truce?" Tanjiro said extending his hand to Genya

"Truce"

The two shook hands

“And what do we do with that one?” The brunette pointed at Muichiro

“He decided to meddle, now let him save himself now” Tanjiro shrugged

Muichiro smiled “I thought it was funny to see how you guys lost”

“You’re the worst of the three of us” Tanjiro laughed

Muichiro stuck his tongue out at them and the three of them smiled.

❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜❤️🧡💛💚🩵💙💜❤️🧡

Thanksssss 💛

[itsjaywalkers]

hi laurie <3 i, too, am all aboard the bartylily train. that said, would you possibly spare some of your bartylily hcs?

hi han beloved <333 I LOVE TO TALK ABOUT THEM SO I'D LOVE TO SHARE SOME HCS i already posted some of them a while ago and u can read them here !! but that being said . here are some more

lily's friends completely despise barty and they never manage to get along with him, while barty's friends accept lily and hang out with her quite often !!

bc of this, i really think that there would exist some distance between lily and the marauders once she starts dating barty.. i feel like she's still very close to mary and marlene despite them not being fond of barty but . it'd be more difficult with james and the rest . for obvious reasons (until james starts dating reg and he also has to suffer barty on a regular basis)

barty is fucking obsessed with her.. he teases her and they bicker a lot but his cool act is just that: an act. he's screaming inside his head the whole time

they fuck a lot and they're real nasty about it. lily lovessss to let go and allow barty to take control, she becomes vvvv submissive and needy when she's horny and barty lives to make her feel good and fucking worship her

barty drives with one hand, cigarette twisted between his fingers, while the other stays on lily's thigh, always way too high to be considered respectable

he tries to be Better just for her bc barty believes lily deserves the very best and he's not That he's never been but lily loves him in all his trashy lame dirty glory

they have study dates and make out sloppy style during their smoke breaks

barty's mum absolutely adores lily and nothing brings barty more joy than seeing them getting along and spending time with each other

barty loves seeing lily get angry or be mean

and lily loves when barty is violent (especially if it's for her) and gets into fights

she always patches him up afterwards and kisses every single one of his injuries

they look like they don't belong together bc she's so princess-like, with her cardigans and her skirts and her gloss and her long red hair, and he's the guy your parents always warned you about, with his band shirts and his ripped jeans and his dirty untied converse and his piercings

and yet . they're Perfect . they balance each other out, and i genuinely feel that this is the relationship in which barty is his Sanest

don't get me wrong he's still a fucking weirdo and kind of unhinged but i feel like lily calms him down in the sense that he feels safe and seen enough to be able to drop some of his devil may care + nothing can touch me attitude

i've talked about this a hundred times but the whole point of their dynamic is that . they can leave their respective masks behind around each other . they're not Lily Evans The Saint or Barty Crouch Jr The Failure . they're just lily and barty!!! you know??

they always smoke after sex

barty bakes with his mum and brings every new thing they make to lily when he goes to pick her up from work

holding hands at all times!!! and she always sits on his lap when they're out!!!!

[perplexingluciddreams]

Today is Mum's birthday!!

Sister is home from uni and she brought me my snack! (And she came into my room yesterday to say hello but I was stuck in my focus so I couldn't make myself look at her or give much attention ☹️). I got a hug!! 😊🥰 She is very cool with an awesome t-shirt and nose ring and beautiful hair. She always looks so put together and lovely. I love her so much.

I have settled into routine of wearing AFO braces on non-bath days. It is too much to do it every day, but I really want to do it... and the only way it is possible to keep up with is if it fits in my routine. So I told Mum all that and she suggested that I only wear them on non-bath days (because bath is very tiring and requires resting afterwards that whole day).

Mum got me new knee-high black socks! (for under braces). They are bamboo and completely seamless (necessary for sensory). They feel super soft and wonderful. I have major sensory issues with socks and shoes, but these socks is the best feelings socks I have maybe ever worn. And that is saying really a lot from me!

The velcro bits (for the elastic strap going over the top of my foot) kept falling off. Dad tried to fix it once but the glue didn't stick because the plastic of the braces is too smooth - it just popped right off again. He has fixed it better now and hopefully 🤞🏻 they will stay now!

I have been trying very hard with something else new - wearing sports bra. I need help with putting it on, but because it is "post surgery bra" with zip at the front, I can wiggle it off without taking t-shirt off (which means I don't need help for that!).

My chest is large and heavy. Causes a lot of pain and discomfort (both sensory and physical muscle pain). I am trying to make this less bad by spreading out the weight of my chest using sports bra. It is sensory very hard, and my ribs really really complain about the pressure of the band. But overall I think it is helping.

I am also looking online for other bras that could help... but finding any that fit my sensory needs as well as the size of my chest and the amount of support I need... it is fucking tricky, I'll say that. Also, any other ones that I see that look semi-promising, I would need much more help getting on and off.

I am used to getting help, and it is fine. I don't care about Mum seeing my boobs - she already helps me bathe and dress and sees me fully naked every other day (and half-naked all the days in-between) and all of that. Privacy is not the main "issue" here. And it is not really a huge "issue" at all.

But sometimes it is nice to have small little things that I have a wee bit independence with. It might not seem like much of anything to most people, but the fact that I can undo the zip on my bra, under my t-shirt, and have the motor planning and dexterity to pull my arms inside the t-shirt to wriggle out of the bra and then put arms back through the right holes - that is pretty huge for me!

It makes me feel more confident and capable. I don't have much confidence or self-belief. In part due to being as disabled as I am, and becoming more and more aware of my impairments and things I can't do, as I have gotten older.

So when there is added in a new thing in my routine, that requires more help... I just have feelings about it, I think. Especially because the gender stuff and dysphoria complicates things. And because it is yet another thing I am asking Mum to do, and I sometimes feel guilty and shameful about that. I don't really know what I am trying to say.

Regardless of the ramble above ^, I am very proud of how hard I am trying with these two new things. They are things that I can already feel the positive effect of, even though it is difficult to tolerate and takes so much brain capacity. I am really putting in so much effort to do good things for my body.

It is hard when something doesn't feel good or nice in the moment, but I know it will have positive later effect. I have trouble brain connecting the future effect with the current present unpleasantness. But I am doing it anyway, and for that I am proud and impressed with myself.