#i thought about rewriting it to be more clear but this is already kinda on the nose if you ask me so uhhh um uhhhhhhh

[quinn-pop]

mtdd week day 2 - first meeting

fingers crossed

[kimarii-00]

Honey would please write something like when Armando left his gf she is a hacker and a weapon specialist without saying anything turned out that's not the only person he left behind. ( Tiny a baby girl who like to hold a wooden spoon ) They meet again when they going to the ammo squad in bad boys for . Her Kelly are besties . Very very angst.

(I accidentally deleted the ask, but I wrote it down before I did so above is the prompt for this, asked by anonymous)

Regrets and Punishments

❥Summary: Armando knows he made a mistake. He knew when he decided that his mother was more important than his girlfriend. But he planned to return to her, he did. He never could’ve anticipated being gone for as long as he was. Seeing her face again was like getting shot: You get that adrenaline rush, yet the pain ends up biting you in the ass later on. Especially when he discovers what, or dare I say, who he also left behind all that time ago.

❥Warnings: Slow burn, kidnapping, language

❥Word Count: 2.7k

❥Part 1/2

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AN: I’m ngl I’m not sure if you meant that you wanted them to have a kid or not, but I wrote it just in case, let me know if that's not what you wanted and I’ll rewrite it! (I also gave the kid a name)

I think I’m going to make this a two parter because I kinda took this prompt and ran with it lol

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He never thought he’d see you again. As much as he didn’t want to, he accepted the fact that he’d fucked up your relationship when he decided to leave you in favor of helping his mothers’ dirty work. He didn’t even give you so much as a call after he’d left to let you know that he was even alive. He only hoped that you were doing fine on your own.

Nonchalantly, Armando walked through the door to the house of the people Mike and Marcus knew, not giving a damn about the warning to stay outside like Mike had told him to. No wonder a gun was drawn and pointed at him as soon as he stepped foot in the home.

“Woah, woah! Kelly-” Mike began his attempt to mediate the situation, “I asked you to wait outside for a second… Alright, Kelly, he’s with us.” Standing in between the gun and his son.

“He can’t be here.” Kelly retorted, keeping her gaze on the wanted criminal standing before her.

“This is my son, Armando.”

“I know who he is and that’s why he can’t be here,” The gun never faltered as she spoke with a solid, demanding voice, “I trust you with my life, but I sure as shit don’t trust him.”

“I trust him,” Mike confirmed.

“Then take him to your house.”

Dorn cleared his throat, trying to release some of the tension that had built in the room. Armando said nothing as Dorn came over to try to calm his girlfriend, and Mike took his son to the opposite side of the room.

Marcus sat down on the couch in the middle of the room and snatched up a bag of chips, “This is some dysfunctional shit.” He said, looking back and forth between the two duos.

They came back together after a minute or two. “She’s fine,” Dorn said.

“She don’t look fine…” Marcus expressed, taking in the obvious irritation and discomfort on her face.

“I’m fine.”

“Yes, you are.” Everyone turned in the direction of Armando, where he only opened the fridge to grab a drink.

“It’s the language barrier,” Marcus explained to Dorn.

“It was English!”

“It was definitely English.”

“I have to call someone. I’ll be back,” Kelly said, picking up her phone and already beginning to dial, “If I’m going to do this I’m gonna need another girl here. She’ll be able to help with the tech stuff too.”

“Is it–” Dorn began, but cut himself off when Kelly nodded, “Tell her to leave Demi at home, we don’t know what kind of shit we’re getting into.”

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When you got the call from Kelly, you weren’t entirely sure what to make of it. She told you she needed you to come over, but when you asked her why, she only said something about “emotional support”. You’d tried to press her for more details but she only mentioned having some people over and needing your tech skills. After a while, you just decided you’d go, but not before you handled your own business.

“Demi, come here please!” You called out while folding another shirt, making a nice crease and adding it to your pile of similar neatly folded shirts.

The aggressive pitter-patter of small feet hitting your hardwood floors alerted you that the person you’d called for was on their way.

“Mama!” You felt the bed on which you were folding clothes dip a bit as a weight threw itself into the soft mattress. You smile when you set your eyes on the girl who is smiling to herself contently—your daughter.

“Mimi, mama has to leave soon,” You said as you picked her up and set her on your hip so you could continue to fold while holding your toddler, “Tiara should be here soon to look after you, okay?” You say, referring to your babysitter that you should probably be paying more considering how many times you’ve called her in the past week or so.

“Mama leaving… again?” Your heart dropped when you watched the smile fade from your daughter's face when she realized you were going to be gone and she was going to be left with the babysitter for what felt like the hundredth time. You always felt bad when things like this came up but… you couldn’t just blow Kelly off. Not after all she’s done for you.

“Yes… Mama’s leaving, I’m sorry baby but I promise I’ll be back as soon as I can okay?” You tried to cheer her up by giving her stomach a few tickles but your daughter was as stubborn as they come, her pout seemingly permanently stuck to her face.

The doorbell stole your attention and you gently set your daughter down. She followed you to the front door, and when you opened it her permanent pout was replaced with nothing but… confusion. You joined her in sporting this facial expression when you both looked at the stranger at your doorstep.

“Can I.. help you?” You ask the woman. She had a soft smile on her face, but for some reason, it didn’t seem welcoming.

“I’m your babysitter.” The woman replied.

“Um… I’m sorry there must be some mistake. My usual babysitter’s name is Tiara, I called her a while ago-”

“Tiara asked me to come here in her stead, she isn’t feeling too well, unfortunately. I’m a coworker of hers.” The woman explained, but you weren’t convinced. Tiara hadn’t mentioned any of this to you when you called her-

Just then, as you were about to make up your mind about whether or not you wanted to slam the door on the lady, you received a message from… Tiara.

3:34 Tiara (Babysitter): Hey, so sorry for the inconvenience but I’m not feeling good today, I sent over my coworker because I know you needed a sitter ASAP! Her name is Sara.

“What was your name again?” You asked, slowly taking your eyes off of your phone and to the lady, still wearing that smile on her face.

“Sara.”

You look her up and down once more before stepping to the side to let the woman inside. Your daughter hid behind and clung to your leg, only peeking out when she was sure the strange woman was not looking at her.

“Um… This is Demi,” You gesture to the girl who has glued herself to your right leg. You try to get her to say hello but she refuses. Sara stoops down to your daughter's level and tries to wave at her but Demi only scooches further out of sight. “The fridge is fully stocked, there are only a few weres, really: Don’t invite anyone else over, no drinking, oh and her bedtime is 8:30.”

“Please do not worry, I’m sure me and Demi will have a great time together.” Sara expresses, that damn smile still plastered on her face. There’s something about this lady that you just don’t like, but if Tiara sent her then it’s probably just you overreacting, right?

“Right… Could I get your phone number, just in case?” You say. She recites her number to you and you quickly enter it into your phone and save the contact, just in case of an emergency. You then turn around and kneel to look your daughter in the face.

“Be good, okay Mimi? I promise I’ll be back soon,” You say, giving her a quick peck on the forehead and a hug. She looks extremely hesitant and to be honest, so are you, but you’re already running late… “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Demi says meekly.

You smile and turn to leave.

If Tiara sent her, there shouldn’t be a problem, right?

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You parked in front of the house that your best friend and her boyfriend lived in. You had no guesses as to why she called you here, but if your technology skills could be useful to her, you’d want to help in any way you can.

You knock on the door and after a while, Kelly answers but stops you before you can go inside. “We kind of got ourselves in some shit, we’ll fill you in.”

She grabs your wrist, pulls you inside, and closes the door shut. The first thing that you lay your eyes on is the monitors that Dorn was sifting through. Pulling up various pictures of people and files that look confidential.

Should I even be here right now…?

“What's the situation?” You ask as you move towards Dorn.

“Remember when we told you all that stuff about Captain Conrad–”

“(Name)?”

You pause when you hear your name. The voice sounds so familiar you're almost scared to turn around and see who it was that called you. You think you know who it was that called, which is probably another reason as to why it takes you so very long to fully turn and face the man that has broken your heart time and time again.

It’s like the world stopped. All of a sudden, everyone in that room except for the man in front of you was irrelevant. There were so many things you wanted to say, yet no words left your mouth.

What is he doing here?

Why is he here?

All of the emotions flowing through you quickly became too much. Without a word, your feet guided you to the nearest room in which you could be alone.

“Do yall know each other?” Mike asked, but received no answer when his son went after the girl, “Do they know each other?” He asked in a more general way, but was met with nothing. The tension silenced everyone.

You ripped your arm out of the hand that had caught it when you reached the empty room. “Get the fuck off of me! What the hell are you doing here?” You exclaimed angrily. All of a sudden, all of those feelings you felt were entirely replaced by rage. Anger, directed at the man who’d left you without a second thought.

“I–” Armando began, but was cut off.

“Y’know what, I don’t care! Get the hell out of my face!”

“(Name), wait– stop,” He said, grabbing hold of your bicep when you tried to turn away from him again.

“You have some fucking nerve!” You growled, entirely in shock of the fact that he thinks he’ll just have a nice chat with you, “I haven’t seen your ass in years! Not a fucking call, or even a damn text! Nothing!”

“I know, I know, I didn’t plan on it being like that,” he pointed out. In actuality, he had no clue or reason as to why he followed you here. He knew he fucked up their relationship and a few words wasn’t going to change that fact. So why was he so desperate to get you to hear him out? He was never like this. It’s been years, why do you still have this weird affect on him?

“Yeah? Well I never planned on being abandoned by you, but look where we fuckin’ are now. Get the hell away from me,” You seethed. He had no clue how hard you were trying not to cry, “I said get the hell off of me!”

You snatch your arm from his grip. Deep down, underneath all of the anger that had boiled up to the surface, you’d missed Armando. You really did. Dealing with the pain of losing him, and never hearing from him until, well now. Taking care of Demi–

Does he even know about Demi? Does he know he’s a…

“Guys, so sorry to interrupt but we have a problem,” Kelly announced from around a corner. You hold eye contact with Armando for a few more seconds, trying to read his face but ultimately giving up. You didn’t want anything to do with him anymore. You stomp out of the room, and he lags behind you.

Upon entering the room where everyone was gathering around Dorn and his monitors, you see he is tapped into someone's security feed, which you quickly find out is Marcus’ and Mikes’ homes where their families were. Dorn was notifying the police to send backup and you realize that there are people attempting to break into the homes. Does this have something to do with their investigation with Captain Conrad?

Mike and Marcus grab their phones and quickly make calls, telling their people to hide, and leave their houses. You watch the cameras and watch as the masked men make their way into the two guys’ respective houses.

“Fuck, fuck!” Marcus says when he watches someone from his house grab a gun from a safe and hide the rest of the family in a closet. You can only home that whoever Marcus decided to trust with his family’s safety was skilled.

Everyone watches and commentates on the man's performance in the security feed, taking down the trespassers one by one until he is able to safely transport the rest of the family out of the house, but not before saluting to the security camera for us onlookers to see.

Mike is not so lucky, as he is not able to reach his wife in time to warn her and the girl who was with her at the time. We all have to watch when she’s easily overpowered and tied up. Mike is still on the phone with her, able to hear everything that’s going on.

A sudden devious voice sounds through the phone, one that was definitely not his wife, “Mr. Lowrey.”

“Who am I speaking to?” Mike lowers his voice and says in a serious tone.

“I think you know who you’re speaking to,” the voice says ominously, “I need your boy, and whatever evidence your beloved Captain has foiled away.” You eye Armando whose eyes were flicking back and forth from the phone to Mike, “And for that, you can have your wife. I’ll call you back with instructions.”

“Ah, shit…” Mike grumbles, but the man on the other side of the phone has not yet hung up.

“Ms. (Name), I know you’re there as well.” Your heart drops to your toes. What could this man want with you? “I’d go ahead and check the security systems for your house as well.” A beep was heard as the man hung up and your eyes widened. No…

He wouldn't, right? You had nothing to do with this operation.

Nevertheless, you pushed Dorn out of the way and pulled up your homes’ cameras, and scanned for anything out of the ordinary. You spotted Demi playing with dolls in her room. The only thing was that you couldn’t spot the babysitter, but you figured she must’ve been in the bathroom.

You let out the breath you didn’t realize you were holding in.

“Who’s kid is that?” Armando spoke up. You looked over but didn’t fully turn around, fearing he’d already figured it out, and just wanted clarification. You were afraid. You were afraid that if he found out, he’d come back into your life. Demi’s life. You didn’t want to get hurt again. You don’t think you could handle him leaving you again, so you stayed silent. You left the question to hang in the air.

The breath you let out was sucked back in when you saw your front door open slightly, then all the way and three masked intruders walked in. “Fuck!” You exclaimed, snatching up your phone and dialing the phone number you’d received from the new babysitter before. She answered after one ring, which you were entirely grateful for, “Sara, grab Demi and get the hell out of there, now. Please!” You frantically spew out. You’d be surprised if she caught any of that.

There was no response on the other end until Sara spoke, “There’s people in the house?” She asked, too calm for your liking.

“Yes, so grab Demi and get the fuck out of there. Take the window if you have to, they’re searching the living room right now,” You say, watching the men search the living room and kitchen, slowly making their way down the hallway which they would find your daughter.

Again, no response. That is, until the chilling words made their way into your ears. “Finally, I was wondering when they’d arrive.” And she hung up.

Your eyes were blown wide enough to where you were sure you were going to start hearing colors and seeing sounds. You were speechless and your heart was racing a mile a minute as you watched the ‘babysitter’ pick your daughter up and… deliver her to the intruders.

You could only watch, helpless as your daughter was kidnapped.

What the hell just happened?

[futurewdclandonorris]

Dinner Reservation | Lando Norris⁴

Pairings: Lando Norris x girlfriend!reader

Summary: you had plans to go out, Lando had other. Watch what happens when you tell him no

Warnings: barely any plot just smut, light dom Lando, kinda bratty both Lando and the reader, and assholes too (idk what came over me, I thought I was being funny) some cringe bits for the sake of the 'plot' but we move, kinda long that's why I included word count, hint of exhibitionism, unprotected sex

Word count: 5389

A/N: Okay, I really need to learn how to write summaries, if anyone wants to be my editor you can hit me up. Perks are you get to see the original copy before I rewrite it for tumblr

Credits to @twinkodium for prompting this idea and brainstorming it with me ♥

You stepped out of the shower with nothing, but a towel wrapped around your body. Not bringing any clothes with you, you proceeded out of the bathroom to the bedroom you shared with your boyfriend. He was sprawled out on the bed, obviously dissatisfied about something–still in his hoodie and black sweats–but the moment you opened the door, his whole demeanor changed, his hungry eyes following you as you strolled across the room to your still unpacked suitcase. Bending down to get your underwear, you felt two arms wrap around your waist, stopping you mid motion.

You smirked, popping your behind and pressing it harder against his pelvis as you fished a pair of panties from the case. He lowly grunted, removing your hair from one shoulder to another, which gave him a clean access for planting a kiss on your neck.

"Plans canceled, why don't you get on the bed for me, gorgeous?" he murmured against your skin.

You tried to sustain your smile, finding the whole situation amusing. Getting a hold of yourself, you turned around to face him.

"We can't cancel plans just because you suddenly got horny." you playfully rolled your eyes. "They're waiting for us."

The plan was to go out and grab dinner with Oscar and Lily. Something like a double date and get together outside business hours.

"They can wait." he still had that stupid grin on his face, brushing his fingertips over the side of yours, his eyes roaming all over your features.

"No, they can't. You're acting like a spoiled child, you know that?" you teased, giving him a playful shove. "Now go get ready, we're already late as it is. They're probably wondering where we are." you urged and knowing there was no point further arguing with you, he scoffed and walked over to the dresser.

"You're acting like we don't spend three weekends a month with them," he protested, buttoning his shirt only a halfway up. "But fine. If you won't listen to me now, I'll bend you over that goddamn dinner table and fuck you in front of everyone. Maybe that will be more appealing to you-"

"Don't be ridiculous." you snorted a laugh.

"Say I won't do it." he stood tall and incredibly close in front of you, his eyes boring into yours making you feel smaller than you were. And you could swear, you didn't know if your wetness was from the shower or somethin else entirely different.

"Please, dress up, sweetheart." he finished, his voice somewhat mocking, leaving you to clutch your panties to your chest standing in the middle of the room.

This whole ordeal may or may have not resulted in you changing the outfit you had in mind from the top. Instead of an orange sundress, you slipped into a white linen bodycon dress that perfectly hugged your curves, cut out sides exposing your toned waist and highlighting your hip bones. Deep v neck brought exposure to your cleavage as well.

Studying yourself in the mirror, the material was so thin it was almost see through. Lando absolutely hated loved this dress. You completed the look with some white sandals. You were in the process of putting on your gold earrings when Lando walked in.

"Are you anywhere near do-" he choked out, eyes turning a darker shade of green as they scanned you from head to toe. He cleared his throat before speaking "You look amazing, darling." he complimented, with a little bitter taste to the pet name he just called you, obviously not approving of the attire. Jackpot.

"Thank you, darling." you grinned as you walked up to him and pecked his cheek, completely ignoring the fact he was fuming.

"Are you ready to go?"

"Lead the way." you responded, your lips still curved into a smile, and laced your hands together.

On the drive to the restaurant, his knuckles turned completely white from how strong his grip on the steering wheel was. His eyes never darted from the road, not even once. No hand holding nor even one kiss at the red light. But instead, you drove in silence, only soft music playing from the radio making any noise as you tried to hide your satisfaction, which you will probably come to regret later, looking out the window.

As expected, Oscar and Lily arrived before you. You apologized for keeping them waiting, but they said they only just got there a few minutes ago due to traffic. A waiter immediately approached you and had your orders right under way in a few moments.

During dinner, Lando wasn't completely ignoring you, but he wasn't really paying attention or engaging with you either. Which didn't come off as strange or like something was wrong between you. You girls had your girl talk and boys had their boy talk. Lily couldn't always attend a race weekend and it's been a while since you last saw her. But there was a mischievous spark in his eyes, only someone who had known him for years could notice, telling you he was planning something.

First, he'd casually drop his hand on your thigh under the table and just rest it there, and then remove it without a second thought, continuing his conversation with Oscar like nothing happened. After a while, he'd put it back on, only higher this time and gently grasp the skin, his thumb drawing circles. Your muscles tensed and made you jump in your seat. He noticed, of course, without sparing you a second glance and dragged his palm up and down your inner thigh like that was going to soothe you. He stopped and left you alone once more when your main course arrived.

While waiting for dessert, his fingers brushed the fabric of your panties without previous warning that made you gasp audibly and place your elbows on the table to support your forehead with your hands, making all cutlery clank. That finally drove some confused looks from Oscar and Lily.

"Are you alright?" Lily asked, curiosity getting the best of her cause this wasn't the first time you jumped in your seat during the conversation.

"I'm fine." you breathed, faking a smile. You turned towards Lando and hissed, covering your mouth "What are you doing?"

He leaned closer into your side, his lips brushing your earlobe as he whispered "I'm thinking about having my dessert now." his fingers still feathered over you. You gave him a wide eyed look. "Say I won't do it." he repeated his words from earlier that instantly made you blush.

"You... you're crazy." you whispered back, glancing sideways at the confused faces around you, most likely thinking you were talking about the weather. God, you hoped they were thinking you were talking about the weather.

"Say it." he insisted, his palm coming to a stop on your pussy.

You bit your lip, getting a clear image of him bending you over the table while Lily, Oscar and the waiter looked on as Lando fucked you right in front of them. It made you wet and you hated yourself for it.

"I... I'm saying it." you mumbled.

"What?" he took a sip of his drink.

"I'm saying it." you leaned closer as the people around you were now completely involved in their own conversations, acting like they didn't hear you the first time. "I'm saying you won't do it." maybe one thing Lando often forgets is how stubbornly bratty you can get.

Lando started, but was interrupted by the waiter coming to pick up your dessert orders. He only quickly added that you will settle this later. The Great Dessert Debate concluded after you were done with your meals. Lily was lobbying for ice cream, Oscar insisting on sorbet, Lando not really giving a damn as long as he wasn't going to have cake and you, of course, wanted something naughty. Oscar finally convinced Lily that sorbet would taste better than ice cream and they decided to get it to-go to bring home. You sighed and ordered cheesecake eventually.

"I changed my mind." Lando started. "I won't be having any dessert here." he smirked and glanced at you.

Idle as he was, he didn't waste an opportunity to dip his hand between your thighs once more and stroke you up and down as soon as you dipped your spoon in your cheesecake. You could've made a scene, but how you were practically purring in your seat, you decided not to.

"Don't move and finish your little treat," he murmured and brought his lips to your cheek and kissed it. "I'm sure sugar will give you enough energy for what's about to come later." you could almost choke as you swallowed.

He squeezed your thigh again under the table, giving you a once over and letting his eyes settle on your mouth. You knew what he was trying to do. He was attempting to turn you on in public while everyone else was almost done with their desserts and it worked, damn it. He didn't stop touching you until dessert was over and the bill was paid, but this time he slid his palm all the way up to your slit and stroked you through the fabric while you were busy–struggling–saying goodbye to Lily and Oscar.

You almost didn't want to get in the car with him, but to drag him to the nearest restroom and have him there. You were just on the verge of exploding, burning and dying a death of a thousand orgasms that needed to be let out, and let out now.

He put the car in drive, with you sitting right next to him, still wet and hard and throbbing. You didn't bother to keep your voice low this time. You huffed and fumed, wanting nothing more than to choke his pretty little neck.

"What is wrong with you?" you hissed.

"What are you talking about?" he asked, looking at you out of the corner of his eye to avoid a car accident with a grin on his face. He really is fucking crazy, you thought.

"You're so damn frustrating. Why haven't you touched me yet?"

"I'm touching you now." he smirked.

"You asshole! You're not touching me-Ah!" you yelped as he dug his thumb into your wetness and began rubbing you, his left hand steadily steering. You spread your legs as far as the car allowed and pulled your knee up, giving him as much access as you could.

"Oh god..." you relaxed and succumbed to your pleasure, making his thumb work at its full potential.

His other fingers were busy playing with your pussy, tracing the fabric to your entrance, but never actually going inside. You were breathing heavily as his fingers grazed closer to your clit each time he would repeat his movements. His thumb found your clit and started massaging it while his pointer and middle finger pulled your panties to the side and slipped in, parting your walls. You shuddered and moaned, but kept your eyes on the road ahead of you.

The way he was touching you was incredible, you were so wet that you could already feel the heat radiating from your skin. And he was doing all that while driving. One hand on the steering wheel, the other one down your panties.

He looked really hot, you had to admit to yourself, as you bit your lip glancing over at him. His eyes fixed on the road, concentration evident on his face as he drilled into you with his right hand. You wanted to lean over and kiss him.

His fingers curled inside of you, hitting that spot. Pumping in and out, you were getting more and more jerky in the passenger seat, only the seat belt restraining you from bucking your hips forward. It was getting so good, so painfully good when he pulled his fingers out of you.

"Don't do that." you whined, as he noticed your hips jerking and tried to move his hand to make you come.

"What?"

"That," you breathed, "Pull your fingers out of me."

He chuckled and put his palm over your pussy again, stroking you from the top. You started getting wetter and your breaths got faster and louder.

"Lando... Please! Don't." you muttered, knowing that in a matter of minutes you'd achieve sweet release.

He continued nonetheless, his nails scratching your skin every time the pad of his thumb would meet with your clitoris. You groaned and spread your legs wider, moaning Lando's name as you came.

"Seriously?" he chuckled again, stopping at the red light.

"Shut up." you glared at him and puffed your disheveled hair out of your face. He was still smiling. "That was not funny." you hissed, removing his hand from you.

"I agree." he said, undeterred by your actions. He brought the hand that was on your pussy up to his mouth and licked his fingers clean. "Mm, now this is what I call dessert." he moaned, licking his lips and savoring the taste. "And that was your first orgasm of the night, babe."

"You're an asshole." you pouted.

"So you've told me." he drove off, his hand coming back to rub your thigh.

"Lando, I'm serious," you grabbed his fingers and pushed them away. "Stop."

"Babe, you should really learn to finish what you start." he said, his cottage cheese fingers now replaced by the dripping wetness of his mouth. "Did you forget?"

"I hate you."

"You love me."

"I'm marrying you for your money."

"And your body." he added, letting his fingers lick your inner thigh.

"You bastard."

"We still have business to run when we get home." he announced, glancing quickly over at you. But your eyes were already half-lidded and there was a pleasant ache between your legs.

"Just drive." you muttered.

"I'm serious." he lightly chuckled, putting his right hand on your leg and rubbing you solidly through your skirt.

"We'll see." you adjusted yourself in the seat. You closed your eyes as you made yourself comfortable, enjoying the rest of the ride home.

Like he knew you needed a bit more rest, he took a longer route home. Pulling into your driveway, you smirked as the lights illuminated your face. You cleared your throat and fixed your skirt before exiting the car and sauntering over to the front of the house without giving a second glance to Lando. You made sure to sway your hips a little extra to grab his attention which worked, considering you were already unlocking the front door when you heard a soft click of his car door, meaning he stayed behind. Your feet were killing you and you only got to kick off one shoe when a pair of strong arms wrapped around you.

"Back where we started," he whispered.

"Something like that." you smiled, your hand grabbing the nape of his neck as you kicked the other shoe off. You stood flat on your bare feet, significantly shorter than him now.

He traced your shoulder with kisses up to your neck, his palms riding up your waist to cup your breasts. A low moan escaped you as he thumbed your nipple. You let your head fall back on his shoulder as your hips began to grind against him.

"I want you." you breathed into his ear.

He was hard against you and you could already feel yourself dripping wet for him. He turned you around, smashing your lips together as he picked you up and carried you to the living room couch. He sat down with you straddling him, your kissing already turned into a heavy make out session, his tongue exploring the depths of your mouth and vice versa.

One hand on your hip helping you rock back and forth, the other one on your jaw and throat, choking lightly and keeping your head in place. His hips buckled up as you sped your movements, making him hiss into your mouth and bite harder on your lower lip. You let out a soft cry, but didn't let that stop you.

Now both of his hands roamed the open back of your dress, his face pressed flat in your cleavage until he brought one of his hands and tugged harshly down at the top of your dress, afraid you heard something snap.

"Oh, did I rip it? Did I rip it for good this time?" he got a bit too overly excited for your liking.

"Yeah, I think one of my straps snapped." you breathed, flustered.

"Thank god!" he exclaimed, rubbing his nose in your cleavage. "I've been waiting for this day."

"I didn't realize you were such a fan of this dress." you sarcastically remarked, rolling your eyes, knowing damn well how he felt about it. You glanced down and saw he had torn the top of the dress almost to your belly button.

"Sorry." he grinned.

"No, you're not." you couldn't help but laugh. "You're going to make me buy a new one." you said, trying to push his face back into your cleavage.

"I'll pay for it." he nodded. You shook your head dismissively, deciding to let the subject go.

Coming up to your breasts, he pressed his palms over them before rubbing his thumbs over your nipples. You moaned as he did, his breath hot on your skin. He moved his mouth to suck on your left breast, closing his eyes and taking in your scent. You let your hand fall to his waist, pulling at his belt. He glanced up, his eyes meeting yours, but only for a moment, before his tongue swirled around your right nipple. Your breath hitched when he grazed you with his teeth, your right hand tugging on his curls. He let your nipple pop out of his mouth before dragging his teeth over your skin, the sensation sending electric currents through you.

"I have an idea-"

"Oh no-"

"Can you stand up for me, please, love?" he innocently grinned up at you.

Just out of pure curiosity you listened to him. He turned you around so that your back was facing him.

"You're going to rip the rest off me, aren't you?"

"Guilty." he pulled the remaining strap down. Your hands were on the couch now, bracing yourself and waiting for his next move.

"You're so dirty." you said, unable to resist sounding disappointed.

"And you're so wet." he said, his fingers pressed up against your drenched panties.

"Shut up." you shuddered, his breath warming the back of your neck.

The fire in you was burning now. You felt his hands snake around your neck and his hot breath on your ear.

"Just because I don't like this dress doesn't mean I don't love you. I love you so much." he whispered.

"I love you more." you replied, relaxed.

He leaned in and kissed your back, all the way down your spine, making you shudder at the feeling of his soft lips against your skin. His hands gently grabbed the remaining fabric of the dress on your hips and in one swift motion, tore it off your body.

"Whoops," he said, dropping the shreds that once made up a dress on the floor.

"You tease." you smirked over your shoulder.

"You love it."

You nodded. You felt his hands gently grab your hips as he pushed you forward a bit and stood up behind you. One of his hands spread across your lower back and the other reached down to grasp on your thigh. He pulled you back against him and you could feel his hardness in between your ass cheeks as he kissed your shoulder. You felt his hand wander up your inner thigh and lightly graze your clit. You moaned in approval and he took that as a cue to keep going. He slipped a finger or two inside you and it was almost instant that he was tapping your g-spot.

"Lando." you breathed, fully leaning on him for support.

"Yes, love?" his voice was deep and low.

"I want you." you whined for the second time that evening.

"And you'll have me." he said, without providing much information on when that will be.

He laid you back on the couch, opening your legs to slide his arms in between your thighs. He lifted your butt off the couch and you wrapped your arms tight around his neck, anticipating the moment where he'd have his face between your legs.

He descended on top of you, his lips kissing your neck before moving over to your ear. His teeth grazed your earlobe and you shuddered as he sucked.

"More." you panted, your fingers clawing at his shirt.

He smirked, giving your ear one last lick before moving his attention to your lips. His rough hands maneuvered over your skin, finally gripping your breasts and pinching your nipples. Your hands cupped his face as he roughly bit down on your lower lip, then moving to your jaw and then your neck.

You pulled off his dress shirt as he attacked your neck with his mouth and his teeth. Your eyes fluttered close as his teeth sank into your shoulder. He pulled away, leaving a series of hickeys on your skin. He climbed back on top of you, his hands snaking down to grab your ass. He looked into your eyes, biting down on his lip as he pushed his hardness into your thigh. You wiggled your hips, getting impatient for him to be inside of you.

"So impatient," he remarked. "Can't you see I'm trying to take my time with you?"

"This is torture." you said instead.

"Now, baby," he said, kissing his way down from in between your chest to your stomach. "No need for dramatics."

Positioning his face just above your pussy, he gently removed your panties as he pushed your legs a bit more forward, angling you just the way he wanted you. Without previous warning, he ran his hot tongue all over you. Oh, god, real torture begins now, you thought.

A moan chocked in your throat as your mouth hung agape. It didn't take long for him to start lapping around your folds, suck on your clit and fuck into your entrance with his pointy tongue. You were a squirmy and moany mess, one hand pulling on his hair, the othe one gripping the couch, but he didn't cease. In fact, it only encouraged him to flick his tongue over your sensitivity and keep tasting you up.

Thighs shaking and repeatedly panting his name, your climax arrived sooner that you anticipated. He licked you clean one last time before getting on top of you once more and kissing you, making you taste yourself on his lips. You sank your teeth into his bottom lip as you sucked on it, receiving a moan into your mouth from him. He gave you a few more pecks before pulling you up by your arms into his embrace.

"What do you say we take this to the bedroom?" he questioned.

You nodded, resting your head on his shoulder as he carried you like a child in his arms, your legs wrapped around his waist.

He dropped you on the bed and fumbled with his pants. That gave you an opportunity to quickly get on your knees and take his belt off and unbutton his pants. He got the hint, taking them down. You rested your head on his thigh, looking up at him–pouting–as you stroked the bulge in his boxers. You probably couldn't count how many times he actually got a boner this evening and had to fight it. His lips parted, shaky breaths escaping him.

"Please..." he begged, fingers raking through your hair.

He didn't have to tell you twice to take his boxers off. After all, you could no longer deny him his pleasure after everything you've put him through this evening. He deserved his little treat. His length sprung forward and you rested it on your tongue. He shuddered, holding your head as you bobbed on him. You started going faster and it wasn't long before you could feel him twitching in your mouth.

You usually didn't do this, but you wanted to tease him as much as you could. When you felt him starting to lose his grip, you stopped and smiled as you looked up at him. Strands of saliva connected your mouth to his cock. He looked at you with a desperate look, his hands holding your head still.

"Why did you stop?" he asked, his voice husky.

"Because you wanted to," you said, beaming.

He shook his head dismissively, returning a smile. You wrapped your lips around his tip again, sucking on him as hard as you could. His head fell back onto his shoulder, his eyes closed in ecstasy. You gripped him in your hands, stroking him as you bobbed your head up and down.

You stopped when it felt like his cock was about to burst. You let go and looked up at him and he caught you before you could say anything. He pulled you up and his lips crashed onto yours. The taste of him was still on your tongue, but you didn't mind. He kissed you tighter, his hands wrapped around your body, his fingers clawing at your lower back.

"Please, stop fucking teasing me." he groaned.

"I'm sorry." I pouted. "I'm so, so sorry."

"Want to show me just how sorry you are? Huh?" he grabbed your jaw, fixing your eyes on him. You nodded in response, this play only turning you on. "I'm going to fuck you right here." he muttered, his voice husky with lust. "Right on this bed, where I have fucked you numerous times before." he took your arms and pinned them to your sides. "Don't. Fight. Me." he warned, making sure not to repeat previous mistakes.

You shook your head and let out a nervous giggle.

"That's my girl." he leaned forward to kiss you again.

You moaned into it, pressing your body against him. His palm rubbed up your leg, parting it wider as he went to your thigh. He held your leg as he slipped it over his shoulder, his fingers brushing faintly over you, your hips bucking against him, urging him to go. He obliged by slipping two fingers. Your back arched up, your head falling back as you groaned.

"So wet for me." he grinned.

"You just don't know what you do to me." you explained, rocking your hips, enjoying the feeling of his fingers filling you up.

"I'll show you what I'm going to do to you." he claimed, gripping your hand and intertwining your fingers. His other hand was working its way further up your thigh and stopping above your knee.

"Do it, Lando." you pleaded.

He hoisted your other leg over his shoulder as well, changing the angle of your body and pushed himself into you. You twisted your head to look at him, your mouth hanging open as you let out a loud cry.

"Oh, fuck me, Lando..." you said breathily.

"Say my name." he rocked his hips faster.

"Lando," you gasped, your thighs beginning to shake.

"Louder." he commanded, squeezing your ass in his hands. "You're louder when you come."

"Lan... Lando!" you moaned, throwing your head back again.

The feeling was so overwhelming that you could feel yourself on the brink of climax. Your thighs started to shake violently and your stomach felt like it was being tickled on the inside. You moaned his name, trying to stifle a scream as you felt the most intense orgasm wash over you. You felt like you were going to pass out. It really had to be the most incredible feeling you ever experienced. You could feel him still hunched over you, filling you up.

"Lay down," he ordered.

"I can't even move," you gasped. "I'm numb."

"Good." he chuckled. "It means you enjoyed yourself."

"What about you?" you asked him.

"I'm covered in you." he kissed you. "That's more than enough."

"I want to make you feel good." you said, trying to catch your breath.

"That's something I'll have to work for." he smirked at you, rolling his cock inside you.

You bit your lip to keep you from moaning as you twisted your hips and dug your nails into his skin. He started kissing and sucking on your neck and your hands fell to his shoulders.

"I think you've had enough fun." he said, nibbling on your ear.

"Too much is never enough." you giggled. "Just stay inside me." you whispered as you put your arms back around his neck.

"I can do that." he smiled before kissing you.

He started thrusting in and out of you slowly, changing the angle again. You moaned into the kiss, your arms tightening around him. You started rocking your hips in sync with his thrusts, filling you up even more. He let go of your arms and cupped your face, still kissing you. You moved your hands to his neck and tangled your fingers into his hair.

"Oh, my god," you moaned into his mouth. "This feels so good."

"Tell me what you feel," he said between kisses.

"I feel full." you said breathily. "Like your cock is stretching me out." this dirty talk made you giggle.

"Tell me how it feels filling you up." he encouraged.

"I feel like I'm ready to burst," you said, shuddering. "I love it."

He pushed into you deeper and his lips found your collar bone.

"Good," he groaned. "I want you to feel good."

"I do." you breathed. "Oh, my god, I do." your eyes rolled back.

"Are you going to come again?" he asked, changing the speed of his thrusts.

"I don't know." you said. "Don't stop." you hugged him closer.

You felt the muscles in your body tightening and you knew you were about to climax again. He pulled back and looked down at you.

"Stay with me." he said, thrusting harder.

"I can't." you moaned.

He lifted you up, changing the position again. He slid out of you slightly then pushed in hard, hitting you in the right spot.

"Oh, fuck," you moaned, arms falling back to your side. "Fuck!" you screamed.

"Good girl," he pulled your face up and kissed you.

You came so hard that your vision went blurry and you felt like passing out again. You could feel him still thrusting into you, trying to keep pace. You bucked against him, your hips constricting as he came inside of you, groaning your name. He put you back down on the bed, his hands still on your body, gently rubbing your skin. You felt like you were on top of the world.

"I love you." you said, turning your head to face him. "So much."

"I love you." he replied, kissing your forehead.

"I'm sorry if I was a bit bratty today." you snuggled closer to him.

"Nah, I deserved it." he played with your fingers on his stomach. "And if I didn't, I know why you do it anyway." he shot you a quick glance.

"Oh, really?" you challenged.

"Uh huh. Don't get me wrong, it's hot and all, but babe, if you want me to fuck you hard all you have to do is ask."

"You're unbelievable." you shoved his shoulder and turned around, getting further away from him as possible. "Let's see the next time I behave like that and you don't get anything." you tucked yourself in with a duvet.

"Babe," he called and rolled his body closer to yours, hugging you from behind. "It was a joke. With some truth in it, but you know-"

You turned around just to hit his chest."

"Asshole."

"Princess."

You snuggled into the crook of his neck as he rested his chin on top of your head, your limbs tangled together.

"Prick."

"Babygirl."

"Wanker."

"If you want round three just say that." even though you both laughed, you still hit him with your fist.

"Fucking idiot."

"Love of my life."

You're not sure when exactly did he stop whispering names of endearment in your ear for you fell asleep in his arms to the sound of his voice with a hint of a smile plastered on your face.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 428: Night of the Kouhai

Previously on BnHA: Well at least Spinner is sort of kind of doing okay??

Today on BnHA: I see the check that I sent to Horikoshi finally cleared.

okay first things first, you all know how it is right. I’ve never made a secret of my Kacchan bias on this blog. I promise you I did actually write a recap to 426 and 427 as well, but both of those chapters went HEAVY on the themes and drama and philosophical shit, and my reactions were kind of all over the place, and the Todoroki one in particular was like a million words wrong and it needs a shit ton of editing which I don’t know when I’ll have the spoons for

on the other hand however, a chapter like this which features class 2A cuteness and an absolutely unreasonable amount of Kacchan character development fanservice to hyperfixate on, takes absolutely no spoons at all and in fact actively recharges some of my spoons, so yeah. here we are

anyway so when we last left off Kacchan and Shouto were in terrible danger from a threat more terrifying than any they’ve ever encountered before. so I already knew this chapter was going to be great

“IIDA IS BIG AND STRONG AND AUTHORITATIVE, LET’S HIDE BEHIND HIM, HE WILL PROTECT US” everyone, I’m delighted to announce that the BnHA manga ending arc, despite having its ups and downs until this point, has officially been saved thanks to this panel right here. pack it up folks. this was officially a sweeping success. this panel brought Tomura back to life and teleported Touya’s mind back into his childhood self from roughly ten years ago time travel fix-it style. Horikoshi you beautiful bastard

Shouto trying to explain that he can handle them one on one but just not ALL TOGETHER IN THIS TERRIFYING SWARM LIKE THIS... buddy you don’t have to explain yourself sob. or is he trying to negotiate with them??

meanwhile Kacchan skips the negotiations entirely because he’s already assessed the situation and knows that the best way to handle this is to appeal to Iida Tenya’s boundless love of regulation and social order

y’all it’s killing me that this boy can handle being LITERALLY MURDERED by the greatest evil the world has ever known. but a group of admiring fifteen year old kouhais? no sir. that’s where he taps out

“but I thought Bakugou liked attention” yes well, you see, Shinsou, it’s kinda a “monkey’s paw curls” sort of thing

Kaminari with the BLACK SPEECH BUBBLE lmfao. FRIENDSHIP WITH KACCHAN HAS BEEN CANCELLED. NOW MIDORIYA IS MY BEST FRIEND

“well you see up until recently the ladies all thought Kacchan was a feral troll so they avoided him at all costs” wow Deku this man literally died for you and you just throw him under the bus with zero hesitation just like that

“SOURCE: ME, HIS CHILDHOOD FRIEND” just adding in his credentials in that little footnote there lest anyone question his authority on the subject

wait so is Shinsou surprised that girls used to not like Kacchan? or is he surprised that Kacchan and Deku were childhood friends? I can see how the latter might be surprising (oh Shinsou, sometimes I forget that you effectively just got here. we have so much to catch you up on. you will not BELIEVE how badly the two of these kids just want to hold hands all the time), but ngl, I’m rooting for the former just for the implications. “you’re seriously telling me a certified ten like him never had any girls interested in him?”

Horikoshi, hear me out, I know there are only two chapters left after this, and they’ve both already been written. but if you wanted to rewrite one of them at the last minute in order to add about a dozen more pages solely dedicated to Shinsou interrogating the rest of class 2A about Kacchan’s love life, out of what he insists is just innocent curiosity with no ulterior motives. well, I would not complain about that

anyway so yes Shinsou he is still single, for now. though I don’t really think it’s the girls you need to be worried about

meanwhile Mineta is all, “I just wanted to let all of you know MY opinion, which is that Bakugou isn’t morally upstanding enough for my delicate sensibilities.” yes you heard that right. Mineta of all people is weighing in on which personalities are deserving of being popular. that’s some audacity right there

A WILD DEKU FANBOY APPEARS???!

“IT GAVE ME COURAGE” omg yesssssss. jotting this down for essay material at some future point in time!! because THIS. this right here is the true “what it means to be a hero” in my opinion. a hero is someone who brings reassurance, yes. someone who makes people feel safe. but I think a hero should also be someone who makes people feel brave. someone who inspires other people to be heroic in turn. so yes, this, all of this, inject it into my veins. wtg Deku

having an official fanboy apparently broke Deku’s brain. hang in there bud. I know you’ve still got villain angst to work through, but try to enjoy this. you’re allowed to have nice things

IS MINETA STRANGLING KACCHAN BY HIS FUCKING TIE OMFG. THAT’S WHY HE NEVER USED TO WEAR THEM. also you’ve worn my patience down all the way now Mineta. get the fuck out of my blog

also Kacchan successfully beat the shit out of him with his ONE GOOD ARM so take that Mineta

also shoutout to this KiriBaku moment right here which feels like the first time we’ve had the two of them together in ages. good stuff

I’m LOVING this panel of Ochako staring at Deku all indecipherably, but ngl it’s also giving me just the slightest bit of anxiety, because does this mean we’re finally gonna get answers on what ultimately happened to Toga. it better not be sad. please don’t ruin my happy chapter with depressing things Horikoshi

“tell them no” OH MY GOD AIZAWA’S TURNING DOWN ALL THE INTERVIEW REQUESTS FOR HIS KIDS SO THEY CAN JUST BE KIDS AGAIN FOR A LITTLE WHILE nooooo what is this. “yeah but I’m prioritizing the kids who aren’t up for dishing to the media about all of their horrific trauma.” omfg. it’s been too long since my last Dadzawa feels. I wasn’t ready after all this time

you guys Izuku finally got a new hero costume that’s not in tatters after all this time. all it took was his old costume getting literally torn to shreds. and now he’s back to looking twelve years old again lol

JEANIST AND FATGUM REUNION?!?! RETURN OF KACCHAN’S THIRD DAD, AND A SECOND WACKY UNCLE TO BACK UP GOOD OLD MIC? GOD BLESS

FAT HIRED TAMAKI AS A SIDEKICK D’AWWWW

now they’re putting the kids to work. glorified janitorial duty. Deku you better not be using up any more of your embers on this sob

this motherfucker did not just liken my baby boy Kacchan to “distressed denim” omg. we have less than three chapters left and we’re spending our hard-earned time on this and I TRULY WOULD NOT CHANGE A SINGLE THING

“Kacchan on light duty” PROTECT HIM!!! don’t think I don’t see you over there too in the background, Aizawa. he’s surrounded by dads. they’re not letting him out of their sight again until he’s thirty

meanwhile he’s out here quietly sorting through trash with his one good hand without complaint and without even the barest hint of a gremlin face. with his half-and-half costume so we can’t see how fucked up his arm is. AND NO MORE MASK. we burned the mask. my thank you letters are in the mail, Horikoshi. and you too TomurAFO, this was your actual greatest contribution to society

ANOTHER DAD?!?!?!

dfjsdlfksldkfjl

“don’t worry, I’m gradually recovering” fsdfkslfkj r.i.p. my ability to take this man seriously ever again. do you think his voice is like the normal sexy Edgeshot ASMR voice except all high-pitched like a squirrel in a Disney princess movie. it is, isn’t it

he can make hands now. buddy you’re amazing. mvp of the entire fucking manga. my son literally owes you his life. please let me see you sitting Jeanist’s shoulder like a parrot before this wonderful glorious chapter ends

Kacchan’s little cheek scar is somehow both badass and adorable at the same time. I can’t stress how fucking much this chapter is just surrounding me with “protect him at all costs” feelings.

MORE SOFT KACCHAN FEELS ON THE NEXT PAGE BECAUSE HORIKOSHI WROTE THIS CHAPTER SPECIFICALLY FOR ME, THANK YOU SO MUCH

“are you... [ever] gonna go back to normal?” because if not he’s gonna cry himself to sleep every night for the rest of his life!! no big!! YOU WOULDN’T DO THAT TO HIM WOULD YOU EDGESHOT?

NO HE WOULD NOT. THANK YOU EDGESHOT. ONCE AGAIN YOU ARE A REAL ONE

...or wait. so does he mean he is indeed going to go back to normal eventually? or is it that he’s embracing this new form as an exciting new evolution, hence the “even further”? it kind of feels like the latter, ngl. especially with this weird sad little smile Kacchan gives in response... fuck me. what the hell am I gonna do when this series ends in two weeks. nobody can rip my soul to pieces as utterly and effortlessly as Horikoshi does, man

THEY MADE THE KIDS LUNCH AWWWW. though in fairness there’s something seriously messed up with Japan if any of these kids ever has to pay for another meal again for the REST OF THEIR LIVES. like come on

noooooo goddammit I’m tired of seeing Izuku quietly despairing over things that AREN’T HIS FAULT

I am glad to see this side of the civilian population, though. sure have come a long way since the low point that was the U.A. clown mob. I like this a whole lot better ngl

what’s up with this mysterious bus all of a sudden

OH MY GOD THEY’RE BACK LMAO. QUICKLY BAKUDADS. form a perimeter

they’re apologizing again dsfkjlskdfjlsfd THEY DIDN’T EVEN CONSIDER EVERYONE’S CIRCUMSTANCES!!! holy shit these first years are all collectively my new favorite character

Cementoss couldn’t take the pressure omfg. is this your first year as a homeroom teacher?? YOU CAN MAKE ANYTHING OUT OF CEMENT BUT CAN YOU MAKE YOURSELF A FREAKING SPINE, CEMENTOSS. I love him

Cementoss is telling them to go work in the corner so they don’t bother everyone else lmao. stuck them as far away from Kacchan as possible. good looking out, Cementoss. how many dads are we up to now?? five? six if we count Iida????

“hey so anyway what actually is up with these fucking kouhai though” I don’t know but my greatest regret is that this only became a thing three chapters before the series finale. where has this nonsense been all my life

“I don’t really understand” me neither fella but here in BnHA land we just roll with it

now we’re cutting back to Ochako who’s making yet another mysterious face that makes me think she knows perfectly well how much we all want to know whether Toga is alive or not, and she’s deliberately dragging it out just to fuck with us

okay I honestly can’t tell if Ochako is being fake cheerful or genuinely cheerful. but it’s definitely fake cheerful right??

aaaaand there’s a close up of Deku with FULL LIGHT back in his eyes like the clouds just parted for the first time in an age. accompanied by a THROB sound effect. ohhhh buddy. did my boy just have a hormone. is it finally that time

THEY’RE LETTING THE KIDS GO BACK HOME OMG. if they want. awwww. r.i.p. fanfic dorms. poor Shinsou missing out ONCE AGAIN

THEY DIDN’T CATCH THE CONCLUSION OF THE TOGACHAKO FIGHT ON FILM??! oh hell no. that settles it, she’s definitely still alive

tell me this cheeky motherfucker (Horikoshi, not Ochako lol) isn’t going to try and actually END THE SERIES with Toga’s fate still all ~mysterious~ and ~up in the air~ like I’m starting to get the sneaking suspicion that he’s doing

HORIKOSHI I SAID I DIDN’T WANT A DEPRESSING CHAPTER WHY ARE YOU HITTING ME WITH THESE FEELS AFTER I LET MY GUARD DOWN

YOU REALLY GAVE MY GIRL A SYMBOLIC FRODO STYLE ANGSTY STAB WOUND SO SHE CAN NEVER FORGET THE PAIN OF THAT DAY ARE YOU KIDDING ME RIGHT NOW WITH THIS

DEKU AHHHHHH

oh my god lol. I’m so curious what’s going to happen next week. my money for the record is on them bonding in a STRICTLY PLATONIC WAY over their respective dead(!??!?!) villains rather than a Romance Thing happening. but I wouldn’t be bothered if they do go there though just so long as we don’t get any timeskip epilogues where they’ve all got fucking kids and such now. don’t you do that to me Horikoshi Kouhei. I swear to god two chapters left omfg. this is really happening. the inexorable march of time etc. etc. ahhhhhhhhh

[jinjinxedsoul]

When The Sun Loved The Moon - Aegon II Targaryen

CHAPTER 5. PLEASURE IS A SERIOUS MATTER

warnings: smut, very slight breeding kink, virginity loss. kinda dark aegon (gets someone murdered) grammar errors (I'm sleep deprived and english is not my first language)

A/N: I hadn't written smut in ages and I'm not doing very well mentally so the smut scene may suck but I promise I'll rewrite it as soon as I can and I'll try to do better on the next one :)

130 A.C

The celebration for Jaella and Jacaerys was as splendid as expected. Mountains of food and dozens of barrels of the finest wines were served to the guests who remained throughout the days of festivities. Far from the excitement dwindling over time, it only grew, fueled by the anticipation of Jacaerys and Helaena’s upcoming wedding.

Jaella seemed particularly cheerful, as Daemon had allowed her more than a few glasses of wine due to the celebration. She had also been granted many dances with Prince Aegon, Prince Aemond, and the young Lord Arryn.

The music ended, and the crowd erupted in applause as some of the couples who had just danced returned to their seats. Others, however, remained on the floor, eager to continue with the next song—among them Jaella and her partner, whom Aegon watched from a distance with clear disdain.

"Mother is watching you," Aemond’s voice came from beside him.

"Let her watch," Aegon shrugged, his tone indifferent. "It’s pathetic."

"Mother?"

"Decran Stark," Aegon corrected, his gaze never leaving Jaella and her dancing partner, who seemed to be laughing together without a care.

"I don’t understand why it bothers you so much," Aemond admitted. "Our niece seems especially charmed by you."

"Northerners tend to be... a bit rough, the complete opposite of what Jaella deserves," Aegon muttered, finishing the remainder of his drink in one swift gulp.

Aemond let out a mocking laugh, earning a sharp look from his brother.

"If we follow that line of thought, do you believe you're what Jaella deserves?" Aegon's grimace was all the response Aemond needed. "But I understand that such things matter little to you. As long as she wants you and you want her, there's nothing the rest of us can say about it."

Aegon nodded in agreement, a subtle sign for Aemond to drop the subject, and his brother took the hint, falling silent.

Since it was the last day of the celebration in Jaella’s honor, Aegon wanted to do something memorable. However, his mood had been dampened by the young Stark's insistence on monopolizing his niece’s attention, so when Jaella finally decided she’d had enough dancing, Aegon knew it was his moment before anyone else could approach her.

The prince stood, and the music stopped. All eyes turned to the young Targaryen, listening closely to what he had to say, especially his mother, who already seemed tired of her son's impulsive actions.

"Before the celebration ends, I want to take this opportunity to present one last gift to Princess Jaella," he spoke loudly enough that everyone in the hall could hear him clearly.

Jaella, who had just returned to her seat at the table, looked curiously toward her uncle. When their eyes met, both their smiles widened, especially Aegon's, who was pleased to have Jaella's attention on him and not on the Northerner.

Aegon continued his speech. 

"Since we were children, I’ve witnessed the immense fascination my niece has had with dragons. Unfortunately, the egg that was placed in her cradle never hatched, and she doesn’t have her own dragon, as almost all family members do. Today, on her fifteenth name day, I want to change that."

Jaella's heart raced, her eyes shining with a mixture of disbelief and excitement. The rest of the guests held their breath at such a declaration. Aegon, knowing everything was in place as he had planned, snapped his fingers. The heavy doors of the hall swung open, revealing two guards carrying a sort of uncovered chest, inside of which were plush golden cushions.

The princess rose from her seat, feeling a rush of excitement coursing through her, her stomach fluttering with anticipation as the guards approached her. Resting atop the cushions was a small dragon, no bigger than a cat, its beautiful scales a shimmering blue-green with copper accents that gleamed like real metal.

Aegon walked over to her and courteously took her hand, guiding her toward the chest that had been placed on the floor. Jaella looked at him, unable to contain her excitement, and the prince nodded, silently assuring her that this was indeed happening.

"Is it really mine?" she asked, her voice trembling with emotion.

"Of course," he smiled, fighting the urge to kiss her. "Its egg hatched a few months ago, and I knew immediately that such a beautiful dragon could only be meant for you."

"Thank you," she whispered, her eyes brimming with tears.

Aegon gently tugged her hand, leading her closer to the dragon. He silently sought approval from the guards, who simply nodded. The small dragon tilted its head curiously at the proximity of the princess's hand. Jaella smiled and extended her hand fully toward the creature. It hesitated for a moment but eventually leaned into her touch, pressing its head against her palm.

The crowd erupted into applause and cheers of joy, but Jaella could barely hear them. Her entire focus was on the magnificent creature before her, while Aegon gazed at her as one might look upon the arrival of spring after a long winter.

"I promise you that very soon, everything I have and everything I am will be yours." 

Jaella chose to believe those words and that after that day, they would finally agree to betroth her to Aegon. She wanted to believe that.

═════𖠁 ═════

The celebration had concluded without any incident; Aegon had behaved well enough, and when he felt too drunk to tolerate Decran Stark's blatant flirtations with Jaella, he simply retreated to his room, leaving the matter to Harland Arryn.

He soon fell asleep, relieved that his mother wouldn't come to scold him for everything he had done over those days. In truth, he didn't care much, for each and every smile and glance Jaella had given him had made it all worth it.

However, he did receive a visitor. It was during the hour of ghosts when Aegon awoke to the sound he heard inside his room. Though he had drunk enough that night, something had been on his mind, keeping his sleep light and allowing him to wake up at such a small disturbance in his chambers.

The prince sat up in bed, rubbing his eyes as he tried to see something through the dimness of his room. It took him a moment, but finally, his eyes made out a delicate figure standing before him, one he recognized instantly.

Jaella seemed nervous, wearing a soft white silk nightgown with embroidery that, Aegon recognized, had been done by Helaena. It was so delicate that it revealed the natural grace of her figure. Her loose hair fell gently in waves down her back and over her chest, shimmering like molten silver in the moonlight that filtered through the curtains of the room.

Aegon, still somewhat disoriented from the lingering effects of sleep and alcohol, couldn’t help the way his heart fluttered in his chest at the magnificent sight before him.

"Jaella," he whispered, his voice still heavy with sleep. "What are you doing here…?"

The younger girl fidgeted with her fingers, avoiding his gaze, feeling too self-conscious to look him in the eyes. Aegon tried to catch her eyes discreetly, briefly worrying that she might be hurt and wanting to make sure there were no traces of tears on her face.

"You left early, uncle," murmured the Velaryon.

Hearing her calm voice, Aegon relaxed a little, his worry easing. He was just about to respond when she spoke again.

"I didn’t get the chance to thank you for all the honors you’ve given me these past few days," she finally lifted her gaze, and for a moment, Aegon's heart seemed to stop. "From crowning me at the tournament to dancing with me every night... and the dragon..."

“You didn’t have to thank me for anything,” Aegon let out a sigh. “It’s what you deserve.”

“And I wanted... I want to thank you by granting you an honor as well.”

Aegon frowned, unable to make sense of her words. Jaella inhaled deeply, then finally made up her mind to move around the bed, coming to stand beside the prince, who couldn’t tear his eyes away from the way the silk clung to every inch of her figure.

“When you were in Dragonstone... You said you wanted to know that I gave myself to you of my own free will,” Jaella’s breath hitched, and Aegon couldn’t help but feel his own quicken in response. “So I’ve come to give myself to you. There’s no coercion, no obligation. Only my will.”

The prince’s heart raced, pounding so loudly that he swore he could hear each beat echoing in his chest. The remnants of sleep vanished instantly, and without much thought, he rose from the bed, standing in front of her. His hands instinctively cupped her face gently, as Aegon searched her eyes for any trace of hesitation.

“Do you really want this?” he asked once more, seeking assurance.

She nodded without breaking eye contact or hesitating for a moment. That was when Aegon leaned in, capturing her lips in a hungry kiss that left both of them breathless. When they pulled apart, Aegon kept their foreheads pressed together, softly stroking Jaella’s cheeks with tenderness.

“You don’t know how much I’ve wanted to kiss you,” he murmured.

“Kiss me again.”

Jaella’s voice sounded almost like a plea, sending a shiver down Aegon’s spine. He joined their lips once more, and as their kisses deepened, the prince’s hands began to explore, first moving down to her neck, framing it with devotion, then to her shoulders where his fingers delicately played with the fabric of her nightgown, soon daring to slide beneath it, gently pushing the sleeves down until her shoulders were fully exposed.

A sigh escaped Jaella’s lips as Aegon left her mouth and dared to place a moist kiss on her collarbone, then moved down her chest, leaving several kisses until he reached her other shoulder. Aegon held her at the waist, surprising himself with how perfectly his hands seemed to fit against her sides. His fingers pressed into her skin through the fabric, feeling the warmth emanating from her body.

He traced his fingers around her waist, playing with the ribbon tied tightly at the front of the nightgown, which kept her nakedness concealed. Jaella opened her eyes, and he gave her a reassuring smile before gently sliding the ribbon, untying the knot, and allowing the nightgown to fall loose and swiftly pool around her feet in a small puddle of white silk.

The weather in King’s Landing was warm enough for that time of year, yet when Jaella stood bare, her skin prickled, and she fought the urge to cover herself. Especially as Aegon seemed to take his time admiring her, his eyes showing neither judgment nor haste, only a devotion that made her feel secure in her vulnerability.

It was not the first time Aegon had seen a woman naked, that was a fact; however, he had never taken the time to admire them. He wasn’t interested in spending time on that, as he always took them in the same way: from behind and without looking at their faces, preventing them from speaking and calling them by the name of the woman now in front of him.

He cupped her face in his hands once more and kissed her repeatedly, his hands moving restlessly over the princess’s smooth, pale skin, stealing gasps and sighs that died directly in his mouth. Jaella, for her part, wasn’t quite sure what to do. Although she had once paid a serving woman to talk to her candidly about matters of pleasure, the flood of emotions she was experiencing made it difficult to remember everything she was supposed to do.

Uncertainly, she brought her trembling hands to Aegon’s shoulders and removed the robe that covered his bare chest. The prince was young, and before the celebration, he had spent days training in the art of combat, which had given his body a well-defined physique, with muscles clearly marked on his skin. Jaella dared to run her hand over Aegon’s torso, causing him to shiver slightly. He wasn’t used to being touched so delicately or admired with the same devotion with which he looked at her. Although their past encounters had always been brief and emotionless, this felt different, and the novelty captivated him.

When Jaella’s hand brushed against the fabric of his trousers, she hesitated and tried to pull away, but Aegon stopped her.

“It’s okay. Don’t stop,” he requested, suddenly feeling more in need of his lover’s touch than he ever had before.

“I don’t want to do it wrong,” she admitted, feeling her cheeks flush.

Aegon smiled to the side and gently caressed her cheek.

“You’re perfect. You couldn’t do anything wrong.”

The prince’s words were the spark that ignited her confidence. Her hands returned to the edge of the fabric, her index finger delicately brushing against his waist, and she was surprised when Aegon placed his hand over hers and, with urgency, guided both of them inside his trousers.

She had never touched a man like this before, but when she wrapped her fingers around Aegon’s already hardened cock and he let out a deep sigh followed by a series of short moans, something inside her ignited. Her movements were initially hesitant, but as Aegon guided her with gentle and firm motions, her confidence grew.

Aegon leaned back, eyes closed and lips slightly parted in pleasure. His breathing became more irregular with each caress Jaella provided. The sensation of her touch, though inexperienced, was enough to make him lose himself in the moment.

Jaella watched him closely, looking for signs in his expression of what pleased him. Whenever she adjusted her rhythm or pressure, Aegon responded with a slight moan or sigh, giving her clear guidance on how to continue.

The prince’s breathing became increasingly erratic and agitated, and only then did Aegon withdraw Jaella’s hand, not wanting to reach his release in that manner. She thought she might have done something wrong, but the thought didn’t linger as the prince kissed her with greater fervor, pulling her firmly by the waist to press their bodies together.

Both gasped at the contact, and as Jaella’s hands tangled in Aegon’s hair, he gently guided her towards his bed. He laid her down delicately on the mattress, and his hand wandered between Jaella’s legs, eliciting a surprised gasp from her that he quickly soothed with a kiss.

“Aegon…” she whispered his name tremulously, feeling his fingers dance slowly and rhythmically through her folds.

The touches, though new and unfamiliar, sent pleasurable waves through her body, creating an overwhelming need that seemed impossible to satisfy.

“Yes?”

“I…”

She didn’t know what she needed, couldn’t put it into words because she had never experienced anything like this before. But the prince, more experienced than she, immediately recognized the implicit desire in her gasps and the way her body quivered slightly. Jaella’s desperate whimpers only intensified Aegon’s arousal, and in less than a second, he had discarded the remaining clothes he wore and quickly resumed his position between Jaella’s legs.

She trembled as she felt his manhood hit her entrance eagerly, he smiled tenderly and amused by the way his niece seemed nervous at that. He covered her face with kisses, trying to compensate for the pain he was about to cause her. Aegon began to enter her, each movement careful, slow, allowing her to adapt to the new sensation.

It was difficult for him to make his way inside her, as it was clear that Jaella's body was a virgin and despite the growing desire that was present, she could not prevent her muscles from tensing at the intrusion. Between caresses and reassuring whispers, Aegon managed to enter completely, causing the young woman's back to arch, feeling slight pangs of pain that ran through her completely.

A few seconds passed before the pain was replaced by a wave of heat that coincided with the moment when Aegon began to move inside her; At first it was uncomfortable, but as time passed his body relaxed, gladly receiving the prince.

"I've dreamed of having you like this every night," he growled softly against her neck, while continuing the pleasurable movement of his hips.

His words drew a moan from her, making her lift her hips, seeking to meet Aegon's thrusts with more urgency. The prince responded immediately, his hand firmly gripping Jaella's waist, while the other roamed almost desperately from her face to her neck, stopping at her breasts, where he massaged and squeezed. He seemed lost in his own desire, his hands traveling across her skin with such hunger that he couldn't focus on just one spot.

The heat inside the princess intensified, making her act with desperation. Pulling hard on Aegon's shoulders, she managed to turn him onto his back on the mattress. Jaella let out a gasp at the sudden sensation of emptiness but quickly straddled him.

The prince let out a chuckle, and a dark smile spread across his face, which only widened at the blush adorning the young woman's cheeks. He was pleasantly surprised by the sudden burst of boldness that seemed to bloom in her. Aegon usually didn’t let women ride him, but with Jaella, none of that mattered. His own preferences and needs became secondary; all he wanted was for her to feel good beside him.

His hands gripped her hips, his fingers sinking into her skin, leaving reddish marks. The pressure intensified as she began to lower herself onto his member. Jaella's hands positioned themselves on Aegon's chest, trying to find balance and not collapse onto him, as the pleasure coursing through her was enough to make her legs tremble.

“That's it,” the prince whispered, smiling and letting out a sigh when he was fully inside her. “Move” he commanded in a hoarse voice.

She was unsure of how to do it, but trusted that her body would know how to respond. Besides, Aegon's expert hands helped her establish a gentle rhythm that soon had both of them moaning uncontrollably.

Jaella tilted her head back slightly, her hair cascading down, as her breathing grew heavier and her movements more erratic. Aegon sat up on the mattress and held her firmly by the back, taking her lips with intensity, guiding her to a pleasurable rhythm that she struggled to match, moving with increasing skill on top of the prince.

“I wish I could be your wife,” Jaella murmured between gasps. “And have you all the time.”

“You will be,” he assured her before moving his lips to Jaella’s chest, marking her skin as much as he could. “You will be my wife, you will share my bed every night, and you will give me children.”

Jaella let out a choked moan upon hearing those words. The promises wrapped in those whispers not only ignited the heat within her body but also warmed her heart, filling her with a hope she had never known before.

“You’re mine,” Aegon murmured with an intensity that made her shiver even more. “You always will be.”

“Then claim me as yours now, fill me with your seed, and let me bear your children. Then they won’t have any choice but to wed me to you.”

Aegon trembled slightly, feeling the pleasure course through him at hearing those words from his precious Jaella’s lips. The idea sounded exceedingly tempting, but he knew that if he did that, it would ruin everything and he would likely be separated from her. His mind was clouded, filled with the haze of desire that seemed to obscure any coherent thoughts.

The image of Jaella pregnant, carrying their children, was a thought that invaded Aegon's mind with overwhelming force. He was consumed by desire, the sight of her body transformed by the fruit of their union, the power to claim her irrevocably.

She was aware of the indecision that seemed to darken her uncle's face and brought one of her hands to his cheek, without stopping to jump on him she kissed him tenderly and forced him to look into her eyes.

"I know it's not the time," she whispered against his lips, "But I don't know when the next time I can enjoy this with you will be or if our wishes will come true."

The idea drew a growl from him and an almost wild instinct made him bury himself hard inside his niece, stealing a pleasurable cry from her that would surely have been heard throughout the hall. The idea that he might not have her again, that this moment could be the first and the last, drove him to act with overwhelming passion.

“Let me feel what it’s like to be completely yours. Fill me as you would if I were your wife.”

“Do you really want that?” he asked, his lips exploring every inch of skin within reach, leaving red marks that would likely linger for some time.

“Please, Aegon,” she moaned, clinging to his back, seeking closer contact, her nails digging into the prince’s skin.

The sensations became overwhelming, building up in her lower abdomen like a pulsing knot that was tightening, making her feel that something was about to break inside her and she needed to know what that imminent release was. Her legs trembled, and the man beneath her couldn’t help but let out a small cry as he felt Jaella’s inner muscles clench around him.

The young woman dissolved into moans that called out the prince's name, leading Aegon to the peak of his pleasure. He made no attempt to withdraw; instead, he thrust more forcefully to ensure she felt him completely.

The warm moisture spread inside Jaella, making her smile along with a few gasps as she felt the slight spasms in Aegon’s member.

Their chests rose and fell rapidly as they both tried to regulate their breathing and match the beats of their hearts. Aegon desperately sought Jaella’s gaze, and when he found it and she smiled at him, he couldn’t help but kiss her with an almost overwhelming tenderness.

Jaella clung to Aegon, her fingers tangled in the prince’s tousled hair as she allowed herself to be carried away by the intensity of her emotions. Aegon's gaze, filled with devotion and longing, was etched in her mind, and she knew that, despite any complications that might arise, this shared moment had forged a bond between them that nothing could break.

═════𖠁 ═════

He gently stroked the young woman's hair and sighed. He didn’t know how long they had been like this, but there were no signs of the sun rising in the sky, so it was still far from dawn, or at least that’s what he wanted to believe because he wasn’t ready to let her go.

“Have you chosen a name for your dragon?” he suddenly asked, tracing invisible shapes on the bare skin of her waist. “I ordered them to start training it with you from tomorrow.”

“Moonfyre,” she said confidently, smiling softly.

Aegon’s chest vibrated with a laugh that escaped his lips, feeling a pang of tenderness upon realizing that Jaella had chosen a name for her dragon that perfectly matched his own.

“Moonfyre?” he asked, still smiling. She nodded. “I like it,” he declared before leaning in to kiss her forehead. “If you ask me, I’ve always associated you with the moon, so I think it’s a great name.”

“Really?”

“Yes, I’ve always thought you have something of the moon. It’s serene and powerful at the same time, and has a unique beauty, just like you.”

The sweetness of Aegon’s words made her chest ache. At that moment, she realized that she wouldn’t be able to be with him in that way whenever she wished, that she wouldn’t be able to hear the affectionate words he reserved solely for her, and that soon she would have to return home where the search for a suitable partner for her would likely begin.

The room fell into silence for a few minutes, and when Aegon noticed the nervousness that seemed to envelop Jaella, he gently caressed her face to draw her attention.

“Is something the matter?” he asked curiously.

Jaella sat up as much as she could, crossing her arms over Aegon’s bare chest, trying to look him in the eye.

“You’re going to marry,” she whispered, her gaze showing the frustration she felt inside. “You’re going to marry that Tyrell girl.”

“What worries you so much, my beautiful pearl?” he asked, brushing the silver strands of her hair with his fingers. “No one will have me like you have me.”

“I know… It’s just that… I don’t want them to take you away from me.”

“They won’t, I assure you,” he smiled to reassure her, continuing to caress her face. “I won’t take any woman other than you as my wife.”

“It doesn’t matter what you want, Aegon,” she felt a lump forming in her throat and gently shook her head. “She will marry you to Laisa Tyrell whether you want it or not. She’ll do it to secure her alliances, but above all, to keep you away from me.”

“Jaella,” his voice grew more serious, and Aegon’s hold on her face became firmer. “No one will keep me away from you, especially not after tonight.”

“And how can you be sure? How can you…”

Her words were interrupted by five rhythmic knocks on the door, which Aegon seemed to recognize immediately, as his smile widened.

“Come in,” the prince requested, surprising Jaella.

The young woman looked at him as if he had gone mad, quickly covering her nakedness with Aegon’s robe and then slipping under the sheets, fearing that one of the guards might recognize her and spread gossip throughout the Red Keep. Aegon chuckled and shook his head.

“It’s alright, my love, it’s just Harland,” he reassured her.

Jaella peeked out from under the sheets, curious to know why the young Arryn was in the prince’s chambers at such a late hour. The brown-haired man looked at her with amusement and smiled, trying to comfort her discomfort, but wanting her to know that anything related to her was safe with him.

“My princes,” he greeted politely with a slight bow. “I bring... news about Lady Laisa.”

Harland’s gaze shifted significantly to Aegon. Jaella felt her insides twist with anger as she couldn’t understand what could be so important about that young girl and why it mattered to Aegon. The prince seemed to notice his niece’s displeasure, as a soft chuckle escaped his lips.

“You can speak freely, Harland. I’m sure the princess will also be interested in what you have to say.”

“Lady Tyrell has... slipped into the Dragonpit unaccompanied,” he said, capturing the princess’s attention. He continued, “Apparently, there has been an incident with Vhagar.”

“An incident?” Aegon asked, raising an eyebrow, though there was no hint of interest in his voice.

“A very unfortunate one, I’m afraid. Vhagar did not take kindly to Lady Laisa and... she suffered horrific burns from which she did not survive.”

The news did not affect Aegon in the slightest, but Jaella felt as though her soul had left her body; a strange chill ran through her, and her insides twisted in turmoil. It was true that she disliked Laisa, but learning of her death wasn’t satisfying, no matter how much she might have wanted to feel that way. After all, her most recent concern had been resolved with this news.

“It’s a shame,” the prince said, without truly meaning it. “Don’t notify anyone of her death until morning. Princess Jaella needs to rest, and we don’t need that kind of drama before she’s had a chance to.”

“As you command,” Harland responded with a bow before leaving.

Jaella, still curled up under the blankets, felt her breathing quicken as she processed the news. Her mind raced, and it didn’t take long for her to connect the dots of the situation.

“Was it you?” she asked, her brow furrowing slightly.

Aegon sighed heavily and opened his arms to her. The princess quickly nestled against his chest, seeking comfort from the shock she had received. He stroked her hair and scattered kisses across her forehead.

“It was your wish that I didn’t marry Laisa Tyrell, wasn’t it?” he asked, placing a finger under her chin to lift her face and make her look at him.

“But I…”

“I didn’t want to marry her either,” he whispered before planting a quick kiss on her lips. “If it wasn’t now, it would have been after the wedding. She sealed her fate by being so insistent on marrying me,” he said, making a face of annoyance.

“Aegon…” she murmured, feeling the knot tightening in her throat.

“Shh,” he looked at her with devotion while stroking her face and trying to calm her growing anxiety. “You don’t need to worry about anything, my beautiful moon. I made this decision, and it won’t affect you in the slightest, alright?”

“You didn’t have to…”

“I did it for you, and I would do it again. If I have to make you the only existing woman in the world for them to let me marry you, then so be it.”

A sigh escaped the young woman’s lips. Her mind was too tumultuous, but Aegon’s sweet words always managed to give her a clarity she wasn’t sure was right. She understood that perhaps the way it had been handled wasn’t ideal, as it wasn’t something she would have done initially. However, knowing that he was willing to go to such lengths to be with her brought a pleasant emotion she couldn’t describe, and she couldn’t help but have a part of her heart melt at Aegon’s devotion.

"What if they find out?"

"No one will find out," he promised. "The only one who knows is Harland, and he cares about you enough to keep quiet."

She nestled closer to him, and he tightened his embrace, wanting her to know he was there for her, no matter what.

"Now you need to rest. Let me handle the problems that will come in the morning."

═════𖠁 ═════

The death of Laisa Tyrell was widely discussed in court; as expected, her father hurled curses and profanities against the dragons of the old house. The king and queen offered their apologies and arranged a grand funeral for the young lady. Aegon, however, did not even bother to show up to offer his condolences, further enraging Lord Tyrell.

Jaella, on the other hand, did attend, offering comforting words to the grieving father, even though she had indirectly caused the tragic event. She reasoned that if Laisa's death was a small price to pay for her own happiness, the least she could do was show respect and offer her condolences. Aegon, of course, allowed her to do as she pleased—if it made her happy, then he was content as well.

The wedding of Jacaerys and Helaena was postponed by two days due to the recent tragedy, much to Aegon's delight as it meant he had more time with Jaella. Another announcement that caused a stir was Viserys' decision to send Harland Arryn to Dragonstone, where he would be sworn in as Jaella’s protector once he came of age. Initially, Aegon wasn’t pleased with the idea, but soon realized that having Harland on his side in Dragonstone might not be such a bad thing after all. The more he thought about it, the more he saw the positives, eventually agreeing with his father’s decision, knowing that expressing discontent wouldn’t have changed much anyway.

However, his sister couldn't have come up with a better idea than to request Lord Cregan Stark, Decran's older brother, to allow the young wolf to accompany them as well, promising to take him under her care. This made no sense, not only to Aegon but also to Daemon, who openly questioned his wife's decision.

The first rumor was that the princess had already decided that the younger Stark would be the one to receive the honor of marrying her daughter. However, Rhaenyra did not intend to wed Jaella to the young Stark, nor was she looking to forge a strategic alliance prematurely. That decision was purely precautionary. The princess was uncertain how much Alicent had poisoned her half-brother's heart, but she feared it was enough to dampen Aegon’s love for Jaella.

With Harland and Decran close—both of whom she knew were infatuated with her daughter—any betrayal by Aegon would be much easier to contain. Perhaps one of them would even volunteer to go after the prince's head if he made a wrong move. If she were lucky, Jaella’s heart might open to either of the two handsome young men with whom she would now live day by day.

Aegon had not taken this particularly well, and that night, he had sought refuge in the Dornish wine he had bought from one of the brothels in the Street of Silk, where he had gone under the guise of properly saying goodbye to the young Arryn.

"You'll be a formidable knight," exclaimed the prince, his words slurring, a sign that he was beginning to lose the battle to the wine. "So lucky. You'll get to see my precious moon every day."

Aegon placed a hand on Harland's shoulder, giving it a slight squeeze.

"You'd better behave yourself when you're at Dragonstone. You must take care of her."

A mocking smile appeared on Harland's lips, and he raised an eyebrow as he looked at the prince, incredulous at what Aegon was saying.

"Are you really going to trust me with her, knowing my feelings for her?"

Aegon dropped his hand and frowned, weighing the young man's words, his tone clearly aimed at provoking the prince. Aegon's temper did worsen, but he restrained himself, deciding not to punch him as he would have liked.

"It's either you or Decran Stark," Aegon spat the words with disdain, and Harland let out a laugh, well aware of the prince's aversion toward the young wolf. "You know full well how strong the princess's feelings for me are, and you know you can't change them."

Harland nodded calmly. The matter didn’t trouble him, nor was it anything he wasn’t already aware of. Despite his affection for Jaella being no secret, he had come to terms with the reality of his position and learned to respect the place Jaella had given Aegon.

"I know, and believe me, I don't intend to. I'll stay as far away as she asks me to," Harland replied.

Aegon sighed, fully aware that his niece enjoyed the young Arryn's company. That promise didn’t guarantee much.

"I'm not a fool, Harland. I have eyes, and I know the princess finds you... attractive," he muttered, eyeing him from head to toe with a hint of disdain. "Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if she wanted to have you."

"Such flattering words, my prince, but please, you're making me nervous," Harland murmured mockingly, trying to hide how much the prince's words had inflated his ego.

Aegon shook his head and rolled his eyes, making a face for him to drop the subject, which only made Harland laugh.

"I take matters of pleasure very seriously, Arryn," Aegon continued after taking a long sip of his wine. "I couldn't deny the princess her pleasure, not after I've shown it to her, and I won’t always be there to give it to her as often as she desires."

It was Harland's turn to roll his eyes, aware that the prince was boasting about having shared Jaella's bed those nights, practically rubbing it in his face that he wasn’t the one to whom the princess had given her maidenhood.

"And why are you telling me this?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Aegon asked, leaning in with a nearly cynical smile, causing Harland to frown. "It's either you or Decran Stark," he repeated with a grimace. "If I had to choose someone to please the princess in my absence... I definitely wouldn't pick you, but right now, I don't have a better option."

"Well... you could always fly to Dragonstone and please her yourself."

"Yes, Harland, what a marvelous idea. I'm sure my sister would welcome me with open arms every time I decide to show up at her castle to fuck her daughter."

"You're smarter than that. Are you really going to let me do whatever I want with the princess while you're here doing nothing?"

Aegon laughed heartily and shook his head, giving Harland a friendly pat on the shoulder, though it seemed more like a false mask trying to hide his discomfort at the idea of leaving Jaella with another man.

"Don’t get it twisted, Arryn," he warned, his voice growing more serious. "This is only for the princess's pleasure. If she doesn’t ask you to do anything, then you do nothing. Got it? Get rid of all those fantasies in your head. You’re only going as her protector. If the princess seeks you out for... other services, then and only then will you provide them."

Harland rolled his eyes once more and nodded, trying to mask his excitement at the thought that, after all, he might have the chance to be with Jaella as he had sometimes imagined. Of course, it wasn’t everything he wanted—he desired not only the princess’s body but also her heart. But he knew that was almost impossible, so whatever Aegon was giving him at that moment was better than nothing.

“I will take good care of her, following your instructions,” he said, inclining his head slightly.

“Just you, Harland. Keep the wolves away,” he patted his shoulder again, feeling more sincere this time. “And let your services not be limited. Obey everything the princess asks of you, even if it goes beyond your scruples.”

“Nothing is too far when it comes to her.”

“Good, I’m glad we’re on the same page about that.”

[chaifootsteps]

need the fandom to understand that 'character who is the soft one who cries is not equal to the character who is in the right'

it makes sense for a show that's primed it's audience to think abuse is just limited to obvious cruelty and insults (but only when the show says it counts, HB cared about Blitzo being a jerk to Moxxie for all of one conversation) but it's frustrating to see this show touted as 'sooo deep' when it could have done a lot more to show the different types of manipulation and abuse with the material it already has

like, a character that's soft and weepy and constantly rewrites reality to favor himself? that's A grade PSA material for how abusers don't always look like Stella or Crimson and make their targets feel like they're the ones who are crazy or in the wrong

Oh yeah, and for the contingent who says Stolas would be treated way more sympathetically if he was a woman - I kind of doubt it, personally. I think a character like Stolas if he was genderswapped would be judged far more harshly for what he does in the Stol/tz storyline, not less

like the audience would probably jump to 'he reminds me of my mom/girlfriend/other female friend who also uses crying and looking pathetic to get people to take her side despite treating me like dirt', 'this or that trait is such a narcissistic thing to do'.

the show already expects its audience to treat the female characters with way more scrutiny and suspicion after all, but I feel like people are more inclined to recognize the figure of the 'narcissistic woman who's only emotional reality is her own' or the image of 'mom who neglects kid for new beau' than they are when it's a male character

and that's not a bad thing, to be clear! it's good the fandom can recognize abusive behaviors in women, probably most often their mothers (though it is disturbing how little they can acknowledge the emotional landscape of the female characters - there's any number of reasons for Stella to feel disenchanted with her life and the fandom cares about none of them)

the problem is they can't extend that logic to Stolas. they can't see how Sad Owl Twink is distorting reality around his relationship with Blitzo and refusing to treat him like a person, or how he's a subpar dad to Via. it feels like the bar for male characters is being set way lower as long as there's a convenient excuse. and it seems part of the reason is more than just Stolas being male, since logically Blitzo wouldn't be getting it in the neck from Stolas fans so much

it seems like it's also because they seem him as soft and harmless that on top of the extra credit male characters get for doing nothing, they've decided he can do no harm. men already deserve a medal for being connected to their emotions, so if Stolas appears soft and sensitive it means he can't possible be abusive or neglectful at the same time. which is just not true

sorry if this is rambling, kinda thinking out loud

Thank you for sharing these thoughts aloud. It's absolutely true...Viv and her fandom seem to have it in their heads that abuse looks like screaming and insults, that sexual abuse looks like being held down (also that it doesn't count if you "get away,") and that is so, so unbelievably dangerous it genuinely chills the blood. It's going to get someone hurt.

[dragonfly0808]

Aisha: The Thesis

I don’t know if I have to keep saying this but SPOILERS FOR THE ENTIRE FUCKING REWRITE UP TIL THE CURRENT CHAPTER (S4 CH 14)

First Things First

The very first words on Aisha’s character sheet are: Sporty, socially awkward dancer

I feel like it’s a bit difficult to explain my thought process when it comes to Aisha. I think most of us can agree she was def the most interesting and most fleshed out in the OG, from her badass intro to her backstory and storyline in s2, she was a young girl who ran from home to avoid being isolated and was loyal to the point of risking her life to save her pixie friends.

Something that was very important to me was showcasing Aisha as being socially awkward and having a hard time believing people like her due to her trauma, years of isolation and never really having friends her own age. Her main relations up til this point have been with Nabu (who she stopped seeing when she was about eight and never really knew), Anne (who she fell for but abruptly stopped seeing when she was twelve) and the pixies (who aren’t human and therefore can’t really give Aisha the experience of having very relatable friends)

Due to all this, an important focus for me in s2 was showing Aisha as feeling like an outsider, she’s not only new to an already very clearly established group who already fought a war together, but she doesn’t really know how to become part of the group and isn’t always sure whether she’s intruding or not.

I tried to show how her integration to the group is kinda slow, giving her a pre-established friendship with Helia so the two could bond over being the new kids and having her first bonds be with Flora and Brandon.

She doesn’t really feel like a part of the group until the girls’ make a mock welcome-to-the-Winx ceremony that they don’t realize is so very important to Aisha because she’s never been part of a group like this before.

^ All of that makes for someone who is incredibly loyal to her friends, everyone in the Winx is very loyal but for Aisha specifically it goes even deeper in the sense that, these aren’t just her best friends, they’re her first friends, the first people that ever made her feel accepted and safe and didn’t vanish on her.

Imposter Syndrome say What?

Imposter Syndrome is a real thing and Aisha suffers real badly because of it. This is smth I’m exploring in her arc during S4: Generation Why (Talk About How Fast We Grew). This affects her in 2 main ways-

She feels like she isn’t a real part of the squad after the confrontation with the Ancestral Witches back in s3 finale (I’ll talk a bit more about that in a moment)

She feels like she won’t be a good queen and often compares herself to Stella and Sky who’ve gotten more experience in that aspect. Aisha can feel suffocated by the thought of some day becoming the queen of Andros, even if she loves her planet, being ruler seems like smth that would take away most of her freedom, which is pretty much her biggest nightmare.

Now, I’ll take a moment here to say that I feel like I haven’t given Aisha the attention that she deserves due to s2 being when she’s introduced and s3 having so much PLOT going on that the character arcs got slightly lost for most of the squad. In S4 I want to redeem this cause my girl deserves some more focus. I will say that the Generation Why arc won’t be the beginning and end of Aisha’s evolution in s4, though it will have a pretty big impact on how she views certain things.

If I’m All I Have, That’s Enough

One of my fave moments in the entire rewrite, is Aisha’s fight against fake-Anne (the Ancestral Witches) where, as the Witches try to convince Aisha that the squad doesn’t truly care for her and only friends with her out of pity, Aisha makes it very clear that, even if that were true, she’d still fight for herself. Because she knows she’s someone who deserves to be fought for and protected.

But even if no one missed her… Aisha would not give up on herself.

She had been alone most of her life, which meant she’d had to take care of herself. And she wasn’t done doing that.

Maybe she still wasn’t all that comfortable in her own skin. Maybe she was still figuring out who she was and what she wanted. Maybe she still doubted herself and the way others viewed her sometimes.

…but that was okay.

She didn’t need to have everything figured out to know that she wanted to live. 

If not to see her friends again… then just for herself.

Because she wanted to meet the person she would become someday.

Because the twelve-year old Aisha she’d once been had deserved to be protected. Just as her future and present self deserved that too.

So if no one was there to save her… then she’d save herself… for herself.

I really wanted to send a message that, while a lot of media will give someone with low self esteem some other motivation to fight for themselves, I really wanted to have Aisha fight for herself, to see that, if no one would fight for herself, she herself would still do it.

It’s a bit hard to phrase but I do think it’s been one of the most beautiful moments in the whole rewrite and while yes, Aisha still doubts herself and her place in the group, she doesn’t doubt that she wants to keep going and that she will fight for who she was, who she is and who she will someday become.

This kinda manifests in her finally standing her ground against her mom and making her see that all the shit she put her through in her childhood was wrong and only affected her in a negative way. It also manifests in her immediately feeling like she was exaggerating (pesky intrusive thoughts) and having to be pulled out of spiraling by Nabu.

I’m really excited to finally give her a bit more attention in s4, beyond just the current arc.

You Can’t Spell Lonesome Without Me

I feel like I’m bouncing all over the place with this thesis but just bare with me please.

Aisha’s main trait as a character is loneliness. She’s been isolated most of her life and, thanks to intrusive thoughts and imposter syndrome, her brain will make her feel alone and like she isn’t a real part of the group, which of course leads her to sometimes be lonely even when she’s with the other girls.

Because you don’t heal from that shit in just one year.

I really wanted this for Aisha cause it’s smth I myself struggle with due to some… really bitchy behavior from certain ‘friends’ in middle school, to this day it will take me 6 months to truly believe someone likes me and isn’t annoyed at spending time with me. I’m in college and middle school still haunts me, so I think it’s only realistic for Aisha to not instantly heal from what was probably an even worse situation.

Her loneliness is one of your brain constantly sabotaging you even when you’re happy with the friend group you currently have.

Thoughts Behind her Main Relationships

Flora: They are best friends, and their friendship is one of softness and comfort. They’ve both dealt with extreme loneliness and have both felt like not-quite-part-of-the-group at some point or another even if it’s for different reasons.

They have a perfect introvert/extrovert balance and are the best at bringing the other out of their respective comfort zones without making it feel forced or pushy.

Their friendship is midnight tea and sitting on balconies looking at the stars and dancing on the beach and cuddling after nightmares and doing each other’s hair and helping each other forget the pain and remember why they love life.

I feel like their friendship can be hard to explain because their friendship is one of quiet moments, of comfort and softness and the little things. It’s the flowers in Aisha’s sweaters and the seashells on Flora’s necklaces. It’s the comfortable silence and the random dance parties.

Nabu: Something I really wanted to do with this relationship was have Nabu kinda help Aisha heal her inner child. When he reveals his identity, they’re playing on a see-saw, they talk while sitting on swings, they run around the beach kicking water up at each other.

Nabu lets her act like a kid, something Aisha never really got to do thanks to her mom. He lets her feel like she can be childish and embarrassing cause she knows he won’t make her feel bad for it. They feel safe around the other, enough to act however they want to.

Another big thing in their relationship was trust and open communication, their situation is slightly awkward due to having an arranged marriage in their future, Aisha questions both their feelings, if they truly fell for each other or if they were just taking the convenient way out. Nabu is very clear that that isn’t the case and that’s what allows their relationship to flourish.

Going to Nabu is really one of the first times Aisha allows herself to go after something she truly wants, contributing to her coming into her own person.

Brandon: So, I would say Brandon might be Aisha’s first deep connection in the squad along with Flora. Brandon kinda sees right through Aisha and her self-doubt and he’s the one that really helps her start coming out of her shell.

The two are massive extroverts and love any and all outdoors activities, and they bond massively over this, constantly going for hikes, skateboarding or trying out new things.

And yes… Aisha does have a bit of a crush on Brandon at first, due to him kinda being the first guy she connects with in her teenage years, and him being… well… Brandon. While she never makes advances or even thinks about it (cause she would never do that to Stella) this does make her feel like an actual teenager, since she never really got the experience of having a silly little teenage crush.

The two are very close and, since both are very touchy people, it does contribute to the crush. Once the crush phase passes, Aisha sees him as a platonic soulmate, the two have a lot in common but wouldn’t ever really work as a couple cause they have too much in common. They are very supportive of one another and just really get one another.

Who is Aisha in this Rewrite?

Aisha is a young woman learning to be comfortable in her skin and to live and fight for herself.

She’s an incredibly loyal friend who struggles with imposter syndrome and intrusive thoughts. She’s working through that and trying to stop feeling like an outsider.

Aisha is someone who spent most of her life in isolation and wishing to run away, to be free. She’s someone who’s learning and embracing a new meaning of freedom and who is trying to come into her own in a way she can be proud of and that won’t restrict her freedom or make her go back to the lonely girl she once was.

Aisha is someone who, even at her darkest times, will fight for herself.

————

Masterlist

Aisha Moodboard

Aisha’s Instagram

Flora and Aisha Moodboard

Aisha and Nabu Moodboard

Aisha and Brandon Moodboard

[hyperraduo22]

my dps roman empires

cuz i keep seeing those videos with my love mine all mine on my feed with consistently ugly-sob-inducing stories and roman empires so now i have this long list i wanna share

+ may include some little facts here and there for anyone new in the fandom

• anderperry’s entire relationship and dynamic

literally no explanation needed on why it’s the top of the list and the first thing i wrote down

the whole hourglass and icarus x the sun dynamics makes me sob every time without fail

someone rewrite the script so they have a happy ending please

also me: wym they already do?? they got married and went to new york??????

• charlie and neil :(((

• thinking about charlie’s experience and dealing with grief post-expulsion

• todd’s entire character

bro makes my quiet x anxious kid heart go brrr

like just thinking about the little implications of his behavior and what’s said about his brother in the script makes me wanna cry and scream and throw a tantrum

he really represents the epitome of all quiet shy kids out there and i really appreciate it

• dead poet’s society but from cameron’s perspective

i understand y’all wanting to punch and yell at him and show no forgiveness but i also think you should give a bit of sympathy for this kid

he doesn’t know any better just like charlie or any of the other poets

damn this movie does a great job of showing reality and the fact that there’s no real enemies

• dead poet’s society but from pitts’s perspective 👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

like i’d pay to see this honestly

• pitts’s screen time :((((

my underrated boy :(((((

• pitts and cameron’s dynamic

i KNOW we see these two talking in the background and seeing him make cameron laugh and smile the most compared to everyone else

like??? i wanna see more?????

cameron being outwardly comfortable around someone finally???

• the fact that all the movie's events ensued as they’re all high schoolers

like idk if there’s a canonical age for any of them but whether they’re juniors or seniors the trauma is still the same

• the thoughts of the kids who stood up on their desks at the end of the movie

how are they dealing with keating being away now? how do they view life in general?? did they really appreciate keatings class???? would they join the dps if they had the chance???????

• hopkins’s portrayal

its kind of a 50/50 since bro barely has screen time, yet i see his character oftentimes being portrayed as the class asshole

i think it’s clear that him and his friends commit tomfoolery and are overall jerks but to think that he’s the more sensible, level-headed guy makes a lot of sense to me—kinda similar to charlie in a way

like he knows limits and when to not push them even if he doesn’t come off that way. all bro does is chill in class and stare off into the windows daydreaming (as shown in the whole ripping out the poetry intro scene). bro doesn’t wanna be there. he’s just chilling and honestly same💀

• spencer’s actual treatment in the movie

ik we love this man, and our headcanons (or at least what i’ve seen and my own for the most part) say that people treat him well but low key everyone be on his shit

like it brings up the question of whether or not this is considered bullying cause any scene i see he’s either blatantly shoved around or even the guys around him purposely steal his medicine and pass it around so he can’t have it (including stick participating in this)-

like i think there’s some limits to being a jerk and idk how spencer really feels throughout the movie cuz he’s a background character :////

• HANDSOME ASS BACKGROUND CHARACTERS AND THEIR SCREEN TIMES = UNFAIR! CRIMINAL !!!!!

• the fact that ginny’s character just gets completely cutout. like she has a few lines to begin with and then the movie comes out and she ends up being a non-speaking extra in the play like i’m- what happened???

• tina and gloria / girl characters portrayed in dps in general

let me explain cuz i love them but also feel bad for their characters

like low key they’re just used as experiments for the cave (implied by charlie in a deleted scene that wasn’t recovered although i think this part is in the original script as well if i remember correctly)

although he brings them back a second time in a deleted scene where they’re all dancing around outside of the cave on the night of the play only for him to make out with one of them in another deleted scene that wasn’t recovered… (( this was revealed in an old interview on someone working behind the scenes btw ))

so like i kinda feel bad for them. like y’all just there for show but i wish you had more lines and other purposes besides possibly not passing a bechdel test ://////

^ lowkey this same concept is kinda seen with chris’s character too. like all she’s there for is a romantic interest for knox. like cmon now she’s one of the main female characters and THIS is what she gets. i wanna know more about my girl chris!!!!

and i kind of understand why it’s set up this way since y’know it’s an all male boarding school in the 1950s—how do you fit female characters in and how are they viewed? it’s not the greatest setup of all time

• ANDERPERRY DELETED SCENE ON THE DOCK NOT MAKING IT INTO THE FILM LIKE OUT OF ALL DELETED SCENES THAT ONE IS THE REALLY IMPORTANT ONE !!!!!!!!!!!!!

• the deleted scene of the poets carrying neil’s coffin 🚶‍♂️

like goodbye. doors closed. tears shed.

kinda glad it’s not in the movie cuz i would’ve sobbed uncontrollably even more than neil’s death

• todd’s poem

another deleted scene that really rearranges my internal organs

the fact that him reading this poem was supposed to be in tandem/include shots with neil’s death-

why do the writers want us to cry rivers?????

BUT ALSO ITS FUNNY ASF IF YALL WATCH THIS DELETED SCENE WHEN TODD IS TELLING THEM WHAT TO REPEAT BETWEEN VERSES, ONE OF THE POETS GOES “what??🤨”

I’M SORRY TODD IK YOURE TRYING BUT THAT LITTLE AIRHEADED ASS “what?” IS SO FUNNY TO ME

• the fact that in the very first version of the script, keating was supposed to have cancer

I FORGOT ABOUT THIS UNTIL LAST MINUTE

LIKE Y’ALL ADMITTED THAT YOU WANTED TO HAVE A SCENE OF KEATING DYING IN A HOSPITAL AND WERE PONDERING ON WHETHER HIS CHARACTER SHOULD HAVE A FATAL ILLNESS FOR THREE DAYS ?!?!?

thank god y’all made the right decision and rewrote the script to take that out

[maknaeswrld]

when you loved me | l.mh

You never thought you’d fall in love, and you never realized you already had.

wc: 2.5k

genre: best friends to strangers; idiots in love; angst; no happy ending here

cw: old writing/rewrite; open ending; Jun isn’t based off anyone in particular it’s just a name I picked; mentions of depression, heartbreak, etc.; y/n lowkey kinda stupid I’ll admit it; please let me know if I’m missing anything

Love had never been very high on your priority list. To be completely honest, you thought you could care less about it. You had goals, aspirations, plans, and you’d seen how your high school friends would willingly drop theirs for the boy they loved. You thought it was dumb, how could they so easily forget about what they wanted all because of a relationship that likely wouldn’t last.

That was always what confused you the most.

And of course your best friend, Lee Minho, being a complete fuckboy who taught girls the meaning of love and the pain of heartbreak all within a single weekend, made the whole ‘not being into relationships’ thing that much easier for you.

No, you didn’t need a significant other, the exhaustion of a relationship, or even the simplicity of ‘being in love’. You didn’t need or want any of it, or at least you didn’t think you did.

After graduating top of your class from your school and getting accepted to your dream university, you and Minho drifted apart from each other due to leading very different lives.

At first the two of you had kept in contact, keeping updated and it was just like high school except he couldn’t bring you McDonald’s at the drop of a hat. But of course, as all cliches must, the ability to stay in touch became more and more difficult as your schedules got busier and busier. Chatting every night while you studied turned into once a week, then once a month, and soon enough maybe a dry text strand asking how life’s been.

It was easy to not notice immediately. You were so swamped with finals and thesis papers and paying tuition as well as rent, that you didn’t register the emptiness of losing your best friend. By the time you noticed, his contact in your phone looked like a strangers and when you saw him on tv you knew you didn’t have a part in his life anymore. You’d much rather leave your friendship with him at the happy memories than make it seem like you were only reaching out because of his newfound fame.

You supported him silently. Every local concert, you could be found somewhere in the stands, pride swelling your heart as you witnessed how far your best friend had come. You’d bought his bands merch when you had extra spending money, you’ve even helped clear fangirls away to make a path so that he and his members could have some space, but you never actually reached out to him. It had been too long and you acknowledged you weren’t a part of his life anymore.

You never thought too much about it, the few times you had led to you crying yourself to sleep in his dance team jacket from high school that he had given you ‘officially’ as a graduation gift.

You figured you just missed your best friend, you never once thought of it as being anything more than that. Until one chilly fall evening, at least.

You had gone to your favorite coffee shop, as you did most days, needing a caffeine boost so you didn’t crash after a long day at work, knowing you still had a concert to attend. There, you ran into your old friend, Jun, who was on Minho’s dance team in high school. You, Jun, and Minho had been fairly close knit in high school. The two of you laughed about the odds and sat down to talk and catch up. Time flew faster than you had anticipated and you noticed you were late for meeting up with your roommates. Swearing under your breath, you excused yourself, much to Jun’s confusion.

“I haven’t missed a show yet, and I really don’t want there to be a first. I know we aren’t friends anymore, but I still like supporting him.” You had explained shyly. Jun’s eyes lit up in realization as he checked his phone and also started panicking.

“Shit! I was supposed to be there ten minutes ago. Um, would you mind some company on your way? Since we’re already heading to the same place.”

You nodded in agreement and with smiles on your faces, you both headed out to cheer on your mutual friend.

Upon arriving at the event, Jun took you in through the back door where staff members usually go.

“I’m sorry, I’ll only be a moment. I’m not supposed to be performing tonight, but I still need to check in with the managers in case I’m needed.”

“It’s fine, take your time. I need to go find my friends anyway.” You smiled at him and turned to head for the stairs that lead to the general public area when you saw something out of the corner of your eye. It was the familiar build of the boy you missed more than you’d ever care to admit, standing more confident than he ever did behind BTS. He was laughing about something and the painfully familiar sound made your heart swell with happiness.

But the happiness you felt upon seeing him so close was short lived as Jun, who was previously blocking your full view, moved enough for you to see a girl next to him, also laughing.

You weren’t sure why you felt like your heart dropped, and you couldn’t explain the tears welling up in your eyes, all you could do was turn around and make a mad dash for the door you had entered through moments earlier.

“Oh, Jun! I didn’t know you were gonna be here tonight.” His voice traveled through the hallway as you turned tail and ran, the sound you had heard every single day back in highschool and not once since hurting your heart that much more. You stopped paying attention to everything around you, zoning out everything they were saying, focused only on leaving the building and getting back to the confines of your apartment as soon as possible. You hated when people saw you cry and you hated even more when you couldn’t stop yourself from crying.

Time felt like it was in slow motion, your brain couldn’t piece together why you were so upset. Once you finally made it home, you slid down your door after shutting it and cried into your knees, sobs wracking your body violently.

Your roommate that worked late and couldn’t make it to the show came running into the living room and you knew she was trying to talk to you, but you just couldn't hear her. You couldn’t pay any attention to anything, images of him laughing and her smiling lovingly at him etched into your mind.

You didn’t really comprehend what was happening, but you were jolted harshly back into reality when your feet were suddenly submerged in warm water. Looking around in confusion, you noticed you were no longer on your living room floor, but naked and being gently helped into a bath. You were shaking and you felt tear streaks on your face.

“Thank you.” You whispered as your friend washed your hair and massaged your scalp. Your voice was horse and you almost didn’t even recognize it yourself.

Eve was a caring soul and your best friend. The two of you had met in university and when you graduated you both decided to move in together. She had been there for you through thick and thin, and she knew you better than anyone else on earth, except maybe Lee Minho.

“Anytime, sweetie. So do you wanna talk about it or sleep it off?”

“I think I need to sleep it off. To be completely honest with you, I’m not a hundred percent certain what ‘it’ even is.”

“I’ll let the others know to keep it down when they get home, you just focus on resting up.”

She smiled kindly and wrapped a large fluffy towel around you. Gently rubbing up and down your arms as she looked you over, she nodded in agreement and left to grab some clothes for you to put on.

Sluggishly putting on the sleep shorts and tank top she left for you, you felt like a zombie as you walked to your bedroom.

A part of you was wondering how Minho’s show was going, and if he noticed you as you left. You shook your head, trying to rid yourself of all thoughts of the boy.

Your bed felt cold and your mind wouldn’t quiet down. All you wanted to do was sleep and forget the indescribable pain that filled you. Sighing in defeat, you threw your blankets off you and moved to your desk, figuring you could get some work done since you couldn’t sleep anyway.

Curling up in your desk chair, you noticed a familiar material draping out of your laundry bucket. You reached out and grabbed the jacket, pulling it to your chest and taking a deep breath. It didn’t smell like him anymore, it stopped smelling like him after the first two washes, but the ghost of it was enough to bring you peace. You hesitantly put on the jacket, zipping it up and burying your face into your knees once again. It was the first time all night that the sadness lifted from your shoulders, even if it was just a tiny bit. Soon enough you felt exhaustion flood your senses, and before you knew it you were awakening to early morning sunlight peeking through your curtains. You had fallen asleep in your desk chair and felt hungover and extremely sore.

Thankful for it being the weekend, you stretched out and moved to your bed, hoping to curl up and sleep the headache away.

As you laid on your side, you heard a soft crinkle. Sitting up, you checked your blankets and sheets for a piece of paper but there wasn’t one. You shrugged it off, etching it up to your mind playing tricks on you, and laid back down.

It had to have been your hypersensitivity to everything because you had never heard the sound before and just heard it twice. You checked your pockets in confusion, thinking maybe you left a receipt or something in it, but both were empty.

Now determined to find the source of the crinkling, you unzipped the jacket and shook it lightly, waiting for something to fall loose but nothing did. You inspected it further after a small glint in the sunlight and noticed a barely visible zipper that blended in seamlessly to the inside of the jacket.

Cautiously unzipping it, you discovered a small hidden pocket that you were certain you had never seen before. You opened it and peered in, taking note of a very worn out, folded up piece of paper.

You unfolded it and immediately recognized Minho’s handwriting, which was now very faded and bled out from it going through the wash, but you could still make it out.

Y/n,

I’m not really sure if I want you to find this or not, but I want to put it here anyways. Jun told me I needed to be brave and, well, when it comes to you, I’m just not. So this is me trying to be brave, for you. I know how you feel about relationships, and I know you never saw me as anything more than your best friend, but I’ve been holding this in since the day you tripped over your own two feet while I was trying to teach you a dance, knocking me to my ass along the way. I’m not sure if you even remember that, but I always will, because it was the day I realized how in love with you I was.

I’m not sure what our futures will bring, a part of me still hopes that it’ll bring you to your senses and us together, but I respect you and your dreams too much to do that to you. Hopefully, at the very least, it won’t pull us apart. I’m not sure if I could handle a life without you in it, I think I’d be too sad.

I genuinely hope I’m by your side when you find this, and I hope we can laugh about it together, but if by some chance future me lets you get away, I want you to know I never had a serious girlfriend because I always thought one day it’d be you, and I also hope you learned to love. It may not be with me, but I hope you’ve found the joys of being in love with someone. I hope you’re happy and doing well.

I know this is really cheesy, that's why I put it in the inside pocket I had made, in hopes you wouldn’t find it. But obviously you did if you’re reading this.

Anyways, happy graduation, Y/l/n Y/n. I’ll always be cheering you on.

Minho

p.s. if you do somehow find this, I’ll buy you a McFlurry :)

You had tears in your eyes as you finished reading the note. Everything started to piece together like a puzzle, you weren’t hurting because you missed your old best friend, you’re heartbroken because the person you fell in love with was happy, but not with you.

You felt so stupid for not realizing it sooner, you were starting to wonder how you had ever passed off anything for it being platonic. You’d watched all your friends fall in love and never once picked up on the signs that you already were.

You were in love with Lee Minho and you had no idea what to do about it. There was a glimmer of hope he was still in love with you, but then you remembered the girl by his side last night. The girl that could make him laugh and put a smile on his face, the girl that was likely by his side before every concert.

Sure, he loved you in high school, but even someone as loyal and stubborn as him must have their limits, and no one would wait for someone they weren’t even in contact with anymore. Just as you come to your senses and accept what your heart had been trying to tell you all along, was when you had confirmed what your heart feared the most.

Love in highschool is fleeting, it’s not the real world, falling in love genuinely with your best friend as a teenager isn’t something that lasts the rest of your life. You’ll graduate and take different life paths and realize that it wasn’t true love in the first place. You’ll grow up, meet new people, and fall in love again, but permanently this time, and any semblance of hope that high school lovers will prevail, shatters like a broken mirror.

You felt even more depressed as you held the note to you, wishing you could turn back the clock and find the stupid hidden pocket sooner. That you could go back and slap yourself for being so blind and naive to think you weren’t in love with your best friend.

But you couldn’t. No one can change the past, only march into the future.

a/n: there’s two separate ways this could end and yes I’ve written them both🤭 thanks for reading, please tell me your thoughts🫶

angsty ending: heartbreak is a part of life

happy ending: love is worth the wait

[cdroloisms]

if i had to be accurate i think exile was not at all obsessive or systematic abuse, i genuinely think it was revenge gone wrong wait hear me out. we have proof that the whole cdream is obsessed with ctommy theory wasnt realistic or canon and if we take into account how weirdly cdream sometimes acted in exile with the whole letting tommy have fun with the trident etc we can kinda make paralels to similar stuff irl which is why i always looked at exile as revenge based bullying gone horribly wrong. like cdream really did act like a highschool bully and you know why it comes across like that? because both ctommy and cdream are hella young. a lot of people wanna make it more traumatic more abusive more horrific or gory or whatever but the simplest explanation is often the first one, it was all bullying. and i find it very very weird how people on the other side did not consider bullying bad enough for it to be taken seriously so they had to invent intestine cakes and whatever the fuck else just to consider exile "bad enough" to be taken seriously when bullying is already more than bad enough.

isolating the victim? check. aking them do something against their will? check. lying to them? check. pretending to be their friend? check. making them believe their other friends abandoned them? check check check.

also the way it was done, like really? literally the trope of no one coming to the party and victim sits alone feeling sad? what is this, a cartoon show about the power of friendship??

exile was neither "not a big deal" nor "horror movie levels of abuse" it simply was a sad arc with themes that do hit too close to home for many. the psychological ramifications that came from it? whole nother issue that needs a seperate analysis because yes, bullying victims can and do develop paranoia and some of the other stuff ctommy exhibited but not all like the whole ctommy still being scared of cdream, following him obsessively even months after it was clear cdream wanted nothing to do with him anymore, etc did throw me off because thats not really regular bullying or even abuse victim behavior??? i digress

tldr exile was bad thats a fact but it wasnt SAW movie franchise levels of bad

sorry for the rant, wanted to get my lore thoughts out

tbf exile being 2 weeks of vengeful peer abuse, also known as bullying, is straight up just canon

the "obsession" take that we specifically had issue with had a lot of issues in the way that it very deliberately rewrote c!dream's entire character to explain ALL of his actions through an obsession with c!tommy. specifically, there was a lot of malice ascribed to him LONG before exile in order to say that c!dream basically wanted to do something like exile from the very beginning to c!tommy, but wasn't able to until exile happened because c!wilbur was protecting him or some other shit. that reading relied on the worst possible faith retelling of everything c!dream has ever done + a good amount of just straight up narrative rewriting to emphasize how young and innocent and vulnerable c!tommy is and how obsessive weird creepy stalker grown ass man who wanted c!tommy to himself c!dream apparently was from day one, a take that emphasizes exile as The End Goal of months of obsession instead of being in service to some other goal as is canon. that's the obsession take that was passed around quite frequently that we specifically took a lot of issue with.

on the other hand, c!tommy being c!dream's victim because c!dream disproportionately blames him and took all sorts of shit out on him and found a degree of vindictive pleasure in hurting him is literally just. canon? that's canon.

[circus-complex]

Glass Mind | 1/?

Rating: Teen+

Relationship: Feng Xin/Mu Qing

Tags: feng xin falls ill, mu qing has to care for him, they may be ooc, Post-Canon, but the timeline is kinda all over the place, Does this count as a sickfic?, Temporary Amnesia, Mutual Pining, Feng Xin is dealing with grief and shoving it aside, Mu Qing doesn't know what he feels

Feng Xin falls ill, messing with his head. Mu Qing tasks himself with taking care of him, as well as finding a cure

Updates every other week on Sunday

Hello! I have decided to rewrite this fic, since I ended up writing myself into a corner and it was hard to progress. The first couple chapters are mostly the same, but I fleshed out a couple of the details so it makes more sense going forward. Chapters will be longer as well, and I actually have a plan. I hope you enjoy!

Also on AO3

Full chapter under the cut

Mu Qing and Feng Xin had known each other for what, 800 years? They were the closest, in a way immortal enemies know each other’s weak points, where to strike to kill. They knew each other inside and out, whether they liked it or not. There were no secrets between them. And yet-

“Why didn’t you tell me?!” Mu Qing stormed into Feng Xin’s palace. “Did you really just lock him up here? What about his duties?”

Feng Xin’s deputies hung their heads and didn’t say a word. After being verbally lashed for a minute too long, one spoke up.

“G-general Xuan Zhen, we were under orders not to let anyone know…” She looked towards the ground, wringing her hands.

“By whom?” Mu Qing sneered.

“General Nan Yang.”

“Well, General Nan Yang isn’t in the right state of mind now is he?” Mu Qing scowled and uncrossed his arms. He pushed through the small crowd that had gathered to see the commotion. Swiftly walking towards Feng Xin’s room, no attempt was made to stop him. Even if the two gods didn’t get along, and nor did their deputies, Feng Xin’s knew better than to approach their rival god himself. Certainly not when he was in a mood like this.

Mu Qing swung Feng Xin’s door open. It was a sad sight. Sheets were ripped to shreds, nonsensical writing covered the walls. Doors were torn from the hinges. Shattered glass was spread along the floor, forcing Mu Qing to watch where he placed his feet. He rapped his knuckles against the doorframe.

“Feng Xin.” The other god, Martial God of the Southeast, did not respond. He sat on the floor, head cocked to the side, grasping at empty air. His eyes were cloudy, looking but not seeing. Mu Qing approached him.

“Feng Xin,” he demanded. No response. Feng Xin didn’t even spare him a glance. No, Feng Xin didn’t even know he was there. Mu Qing moved to stand in front of him, a foot and a half away. He lightly kicked Feng Xin’s leg with the toe of his boot, frowning.

Feng Xin’s eyes, once a foggy, hazy day, cleared to an overcast sky.

He shrieked.

Mu Qing, caught off guard, took a step backwards. Feng Xin tried to get away, slipped, and slammed his head against the floor. Mu Qing waited a moment before picking up the weak, still god, carrying him to his bed. He laid him onto already messy sheets. Working around the half-asleep man, he slowly replaced the torn bedding. Brushing the glass into one corner, he sat on the other side of the room. Feng Xin’s eyes were back to cloudy. Clothing, while intact, was ripped and stained with what looked like blood. Bruises and cuts littered his body. A bath would do him good. But before he acted, a thought struck him.

Ling Wen? Mu Qing spoke into a private communication array. Who is Feng Xin closest with?

Ling Wen, who had clearly heard him given the open line, paused. I’m not sure I know what you mean.

Mu Qing huffed. I’m asking who Feng Xin knows best. Who- who would care for him, if he was hurt?

General Xuan Zhen, have you encountered any sort of malicious creatures lately? I thought you were off duty this week?

I- no.

Well, I would assume that person would be you, General. With that, Ling Wen cut the communication array off.

Mu Qing groaned. He could ask Xie Lian to help Feng Xin, but he was probably busy with that “San Lang” of his. All of Feng Xin’s attendants were there to manage prayers, not manage the gods' basic needs. Mu Qing was 70% sure Feng Xin and Pei Ming were sort of friends. But there was no way Mu Qing would ask him for help.

He stripped the bloody god. Each torn piece of clothing removed only revealed more and more injuries. Had he inflicted them upon himself? Had some creature done it to him? Broken sentences fell out of Feng Xin’s mouth, shattering on the floor before Mu Qing could catch them.

Feng Xin let out a low hiss as Mu Qing pressed a nasty bruise too hard. Mu Qing made a note to bring medical salves and bandages next time. He picked the limp god up carefully, making sure not to touch any wounds.

Luckily, Mu Qing was familiar with the layout of Feng Xin’s palace. He carried him to Feng Xin’s private bath. The walk was short.

Feng Xin grew alert as the steam touched his face. He clawed at Mu Qing’s robes, making noises of protest. Mu Qing ignored him, and set Feng Xin on the ground. All the windows were made of the finest glass, pool lined with smooth tiles. Heating talismans were embedded into the stones, specially crafted not to lose their power nor crumble when wet. It was a subtle display of the power Feng Xin held.

Water was already starting to cling to Mu Qing’s skin. He lowered Feng Xin into the water. Feng Xin squirmed, but once the water reached his torso, he relaxed. Mu Qing watched as flecks of dried blood were already starting to fall away. Dirt and grime fell off his body, disappearing into enchanted water. Leaving Feng Xin but still keeping his eyes on him, Mu Qing picked through the row of soaps. He selected the few he knew Feng Xin liked and walked back over.

Feng Xin had gone from dead still and silent to babbling and grabbing the air. Mu Qing wasn’t sure which version he preferred. Maybe silent, it made him easier to deal with. Mu Qing crossed his arms, thoughts speeding. Feng Xin jerked backwards, and Mu Qing hissed when water splashed onto his robes. It was an expected cost, but Mu Qing still wasn’t happy about it. He didn’t want to harm Feng Xin, but he doubted he’d cooperate. But simply putting him into water and re-dressing him wouldn’t do much good, it would be better to fully clean him. His hair was matted and even though most of the dirt was gone, there was still some within his cuts. Infections would be no fun, not in this state. Finally settling on a plan, Mu Qing got to work.

[pantoneyoongi]

the sun & the stars | 01 | kth

title ; the sun & the stars pairing ; taehyung x you

word count ; 5.4k

masterlist | part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | epilogue

description ; 

taehyung’s known you almost his whole life - his sister’s best friend, the girl who invades his home and his life on the daily. you’re the one who gave his sister the nickname ‘sky’ to begin with - and also the one who relented when he whined about it at age five and said okay, you can be the stars, then. 

it’s funny, because to him, you’re just the petty, mischievous neighbor from across the street with a penchant for stealing his snacks. but over the years, you’ve somehow landed yourself a reputation that stretches beyond the 1.5 year age gap he has with you - for someone who generally likes to keep things low key, you sure have a way of drawing attention. 

sky’s friendly, teasing best friend is known for being cold, impassive, and immovable. which is weird, because when he’s around you, all he sees are unabashed grins and terrible jokes. until he realizes maybe he doesn’t know you like he thought he did. maybe they’re right - it just so happens that the walls you throw up around him look a little different from the walls you throw up around everyone else. 

tracklist ; willow - taylor swift, give me your forever - zack tabudlo ft. billkin, limbo - keshi

notes ; 

ok so i don’t have a masterlist for this yet but this is going to be part of a universe called the sun & the sky universe, about two besties and their love lives and friendship and originally it was supposed to be a one-shot for each character but i have spiraled wildly out of control and now this character (sun) has a mini-series, oops. 

anyway this is the first installation in the sun & the sky universe and eventually i will get around to making a masterpost. thank u for reading !! 

tags ; college!au, best friend’s little brother!au, childhood friends to lovers, you have a cold/ice princess reputation, angst, fluff, mentions of absent parents and financial instability, you’re referred to as ‘sun’, taehyung’s sister referred to as ‘sky’, mentions of some dude being kinda pushy at the beginning, some business major slander (sorry) (sort of), there will be pov switches later, there will also be seokjin slander (he’ll deserve it unfortunately i’m so sorry), slow burn?? i think??, brief mentions of infidelity at some point later too, honestly this whole fic is probably more about friendships than it is about romance but anyways, yes this is the fic that i wrote 10k for and then randomly decided to rewrite the entire thing bc i have no control over my life thank u very much, anyway here it is i hope u like it 

to be very clear: you don’t like freshmen. 

irritation crawls up your spine, and you spare just enough time to glance both ways before crossing the street to reach your friend, who looks increasingly uncomfortable. she’s already backed up enough that she’s only centimeters from the wall behind her, which, in case the relief on her face at the sight of you didn’t already spell it out, tells you plenty enough that this one’s persistent and unwelcome. 

“hey.” you don’t raise your voice when you reach them. you generally make it a point not to expend more energy than absolutely necessary, but particularly when it comes to men, and especially when they’re harassing your best friend. you hardly look his way, instead speaking to your friend with a tilt of your head towards the campus dining hall. “let’s go.” 

jinyoung calls you blunt and a little rude (affectionate), but you prefer the terms ‘concise’ and ‘clear’. as in, you are concisely and clearly indicating the freshman should leave. you know, something about a-b conversations and how he should c his way out. 

your shoulders raise ever so slightly when, predictably, the freshman opens his mouth to argue. that’s the thing about freshmen. and transfers. and men who don’t know what’s good for them: they don’t know you, and they don’t know your reputation, and that causes more problems than you care to deal with. 

lucky for him, he happens to know someone who’s been out of the womb for longer than the ten seconds this kid appears to have been. in your peripheral, you watch the freshman get yanked back by a junior you think might’ve been in one of your roman history lectures last semester. “what the fuck is wrong with you,” he hisses to his friend, eyes darting nervously between the boy and you. his voice raises to normal speaking levels. “i’m so sorry. he’s so sorry for bothering you,” and then he’s dragging the kid away with hushed, frantic whispers. you watch them cross the street and head down and away, before turning back to your friend. 

“you good, sky?” 

she gives you a half-smile. “i’d be better with food in me.” 

your lips twitch, and you sling an arm over her shoulders, tugging her through the dining hall doors. “good thing that’s what we’re here for.” 

.

.

.

your reputation is more tall tale than fact, but you let it carry you through the four years of high school and now clean through your four years of college, too. for a group of students who are so rarely capable of meeting your eyes, they speak fairly condescendingly about you. it probably has a lot to do with the ‘sun’ nickname, seeing as it just seems laughable to associate the most well-known star in the galaxy with you. 

you’re not warm. you don’t light up a room. none of the good cliches line up with you, and to most people, the nickname is more irony than anything else. but you didn’t get the nickname from them, you got it from sky, shortly after you gave her hers when you were seven. 

(seven year old you was a lot friendlier.)

your eyes slide closed, chin propped against your palm as you wait at the lunch table. sky is grabbing food while you save the table, waiting for her brother and his partner in crime to show up. 

the four of you grew up on the same street - sky and taehyung in the house across from you, and jimin a couple doors down. jimin and taehyung are technically the same age, the way you and sky are too, but taehyung’s birthday is so late in the year that he’s two grades below you instead of just one. they say you and sky have been inseparable since day one, but taehyung and jimin must be conjoined at the hip - you don’t find one without seeing the other. 

you feel someone brush past you, a hand hovering by your head, but before it can nudge you, you say with closed eyes, “watch it, kid.” 

your eyes flutter open, finding jimin pouting in front of you, hand returning to his side. “how’d you know it was me?” 

“who else would dare?” you arch an eyebrow, and he sucks his teeth, dropping into the seat diagonal from you. taehyung takes the seat to your left, nodding his head in greeting towards you. 

your lips quirk to the side. “do i not deserve the honor of your voice today, taetae?” you give him doe eyes, just to watch him scowl at you. 

growing up with taehyung and sky right across the street from you meant watching taehyung turn from an adorable toddler, to a mildly annoying child, into a definitely annoying teenager. this also included a two year stint in which taehyung refused to speak to you (or in general, really), only making vague grunting noises and giving you curt nods in an attempt to come off as stoic and brooding. 

(as a shock to no one: it was ineffective as far as ‘stoic’ and ‘brooding’ go.) 

ever since he decided to grace you with his voice again, you take any chance to remind him of it. you grin wickedly as he lolls his head back with a groan. “i was shy,” he protests, bordering on a whine. 

you scoff. “i’ve known you since you were three, fuck outta here,” you cuff him lightly upside the head, taehyung’s lower lip jutting out at the action. “you were just an angsty teenager.” 

sky makes her appearance at that moment, setting her tray down. “can confirm,” she agrees with zero proper context. “you were just an angsty teenager.” 

taehyung huffs. you poke your tongue against your cheek, amusement lighting your eyes. he tries to glare but taehyung’s always been a little soft on you, even if he won’t admit it. he marks defeat with a switch in subject. “you look tired.” 

you sputter out a laugh. “i’m a college student,” you smack his shoulder lightly. “i always look tired.” you redirect your attention back to jimin and sky, joining the conversation they’d started, but taehyung stays quiet, studying you. eventually he gets up to grab food, jimin following after him, but you opt to just lay your head against your forearm, letting sky pat your head sympathetically. 

you raise your head only when the boys return, eyes widening slightly in surprise when taehyung comes back with two trays, sliding one in front of you wordlessly. “you raised him well,” jimin sighs dramatically to sky. “treats his elders with respect.” 

“that makes one of you,” you quip, just as sky goes, “are you calling me an elder?” 

the two of you burst into laughter at the look on jimin’s face, halfway between being offended by you and defensive against sky, and while you’re busy teasing jimin, you don’t notice taehyung watching you, wondering how anyone can see you as cold and standoffish, not when he sees you like this, voice loud and eyes crinkled in the corners, always the brightest whenever you make the people you love and care about laugh. they say you’re cruel and unforgiving, but he’s known you for years and he doesn’t really feel like you’ve changed much - still wildly dramatic and bitingly sarcastic - and also apparently still endlessly prone to stealing food from him and sky, he thinks dryly, as he throws you a dirty look for snagging a french fry off his plate despite having your own. 

you smile pretty at him. “sharing is caring, taetae.” 

he can’t retort when you blink your eyes at him like that because there’s just no winning when it comes to you. all he can do is let out a deep sigh and fight the smile making its way onto his face when your laughter chimes in his ear. 

.

.

.

“what if,” you start, just for jinyoung to cut you off. 

“no.” 

you throw the towel down onto the table, affronted. “you didn’t let me finish.” 

he stares flatly at you, then makes a jerky, ‘go-ahead’ gesture with his hand. 

“what if,” you start again, pointing your finger at him. “i drop out of school-” 

“what if,” jinyoung smiles like he’s got knives for teeth. “i get you fired?” 

you scrunch your nose. “then i’d be young, dumb, and broke.” 

“just like all the cool kids,” jinyoung sighs, clearly not giving a fuck. “hurry up, we got company.” 

the bell above the restaurant door rings as probably an entire fraternity funnels in, forty-five minutes before your shift ends. “perfect,” you mutter, picking up your towel again, scrubbing the table clean while jinyoung puts on a (notably knifeless) smile for your customers. the closing shift can never end quietly, always some group coming in last minute to interrupt your peaceful night. you always know jinyoung happens to like you because he sidles up to the group with his full charm and a notepad, ready to take orders, letting you slink off to the back to finish cleaning up so the two of you can get out of here as quickly as possible as soon as the sign flips to ‘closed.’ 

jinyoung returns to the back to rattle off orders five minutes later, then leans with his back to the counter as you rinse dishes to put into the industrial dishwasher. “you should stop taking extra shifts. your eyebags have eyebags,” he informs you, as gently as he can. you glance at him, wondering if it’s worth it to flick him with water. but you know he’s just trying to be nice, so you opt against it. 

you suck in a breath, setting another dish down onto the rack. “i can’t,” you shrug. “i am, in fact, young, dumb, and broke.” 

he presses his lips together in a non-smile. like you, jinyoung is here on scholarship and part of the pity-party program your school has for kids who meet the criteria of “too poor to afford higher education.” you met him in said program over the summer, when you were all forced to come in for summer classes, just in case you came from a district without sufficient resources to teach you calculus. 

he runs a tired hand through his hair, offering you a small smile before heading out with an array of dishes balanced impressively on his arm. the frat has approximately twenty minutes to shovel it all down before the restaurant officially calls it lights out. you have no doubts they’ll make it with time to spare. 

you flip the settings for the dishwasher and let it run, tugging off your gloves and wandering towards the front. absently, you stare out the glass that makes up the storefront, eyes nearly glazing over until you spot them - your head lifting slowly as you lean forward a little to squint. 

she’s a little too far out, but the person heading down the street looks an awful lot like sky, flanked by someone who looks half a foot taller than her, which is saying something, considering sky is half a foot taller than you. your head tilts, curious, but by the time you’ve blinked enough times to get your vision back in focus, they’re out of sight. 

shaking it off, you check the clock to see that you’re ten minutes to closing, confirmed by the way you hear the frat boys noisily filing back out just the way they came in. jinyoung’s eyes meet yours and you give a tired nod, the two of you working in tandem to clear the remaining dishes to finish cleaning up and close up shop. 

jinyoung bids you goodbye outside the restaurant with a pat on the shoulder, parting ways. it’s late, little ways past ten at night, and you slump your shoulders as you trudge down the street back to your apartment. 

you take a half step back when taehyung’s face suddenly appears in front of yours, familiar dark eyes peering at you. he’s got his hands in his pockets and he’s bent over slightly to meet your height, and you frown at him. “what are you doing here?” 

“jimin dragged me out,” he explains, straightening back up. “but now they’re getting drunk, so.” 

of the four of you, jimin’s always been the only one with anything close to a social life. he parties, he drinks, he gets hungover, and then he gets straight a’s. go figure. 

you hum, the two of you falling into step together. the silence is comfortable, padded with the general ruckus of the downtown, cars speeding past and drunk students being rowdy. you make your way back to the main streets on campus, taehyung slowing his steps to match your snail pace. 

“sun,” he breaks the quiet between you. you look at him. 

he opens his mouth to speak, but there’s only empty air, the words dying on his tongue when he sees how dull your eyes look after a long shift. your eyes have always sparkled, glinting with trouble and quick wit, so it sort of stings to see the light fade out with how weary you are. 

“never mind,” he smiles, tilting his chin towards your building’s front door. “we’re here.” 

you look confused but don’t press the matter, patting him on the arm with a warm smile. “get back safe. thanks for walking me home, tae.” you tip-toe to ruffle his hair, like you always have, despite the near foot of height he now towers over you with, then disappear into your building without a second glance back. 

taehyung sighs, hand absently pressed to the spot where you’d touched his arm. he knows your smile better than anyone else’s, that dazzling grin of yours that you reserve only for your closest friends. even when taehyung went through his brooding phase, you always offered it out to him with a friendly wave. 

the campus might not understand the nickname ‘sun,’ but taehyung knows it suits you perfectly. 

.

.

.

“am i still allowed to live in your basement if i fail out of college?” 

you punctuate the end of your question by dropping the bag of take-out you brought with you onto the table, though the end of your sentence sort of peeters off a little when you realize there’s someone else departing the table, a low voice murmuring a goodbye to your friend. you don’t catch his face before his tall frame walks away, but your brows furrow, puzzled. you don’t recognize him. 

“i think you’d live in my basement regardless of what i say,” sky responds, seemingly unaware of your perplexion. “but unfortunately you’re not allowed to fail out of college.” 

your eyes are still on the man who’d just left, even as you pull out the take-out and hand it over to sky. you’re tempted to ask, but when you glance back at her, she has an unnervingly neutral expression on her face, and you falter, deciding to drop it. 

sky likes to keep her circle small. most of the time it’s just you, jimin, and taehyung, though both of you do still keep in touch with yoongi and hoseok from high school, and there is that one girl from her major, soojung. but for the most part, sky prefers keeping to herself, so much so that on occasion she’ll just drop off the grid without any warning. you suppose you’re like her in that way, though her version of dropping off the grid is usually more accidental (read: a new video game came out and she forgot she has to remind people she’s alive) whereas yours tends to be very intentional (read: you’re overwhelmed and so much as seeing or interacting with another person could equate to a new, special kind of torture, built explicitly for you). 

you slide on a smile for her, settling down into your seat. “eat,” you gesture. “need at least one of us to make it past graduation if i’m gonna live in your basement.” 

as sky tucks in, absently scrolling through her phone, your mind wanders. it’s not that you need to know every last detail of sky’s life, but she’s your best friend, and it just tends to happen, anyway. sky’s life is so heavily interwoven with yours, since you were five and moved into the house across the street from hers, and she let you into her home like you’d always belonged there. 

then again, that was a boy you’d seen walking away. your eyes shift back to sky, who isn’t paying you much mind, and you look away again. the truth is, the tightly bound friendship you hold with sky feels as fragile as it does indestructible, and you have no one to blame but yourself. 

.

.

.

food is your love language. giving it, receiving it, whatever the case is - it’s love. it might also be your sole motivator for doing just about anything, but that’s besides the point. 

you use food as a means of taking care of the people around you. it’s not exactly a flashy show of affection, but you don’t have a particularly heartwarming vocabulary, or the disposition to shower people in your affection, so this is what you do. most people seem to take the hint. you figure that’s why taehyung puts up with you on at minimum a weekly basis, grabbing a meal together whenever he’s free. 

today, he’s seated at your kitchen counter, glancing around your apartment like he hasn’t been here a million times before. you set your ever-gourmet pot of instant noodles down on top of a pot holder. “ta-da,” you beam at him, waving your hands dramatically. “my specialty.” 

“you treat me so well,” he says dryly, but his eyes are affectionate and he’s still picking up his chopsticks almost immediately, tongue poking out at the corner of his lips in anticipation. you press your lips together to hide a smile, watching him gather noodles, messily sucking them into his mouth, flicking soup everywhere. 

you click your tongue a little but don’t nag, though the look you give him makes him settle down a little, chewing slower and acting at least somewhat more like a civilized human being. he looks properly chastised, and the corner of your lips lift in a small smirk of amusement. 

the two of you eat quietly, taehyung because he’s always been quiet and you because you’re lost in thought, enough so that you forget to entertain taehyung the way you usually do (read: complain about almost every class you’re in and lament your age, as if you’re anything more than a year and a half older than taehyung, max). your eyes are distant, chopsticks absently picking up noodles to eat, on autopilot. 

you glance back to taehyung, who doesn’t seem to mind your quiet. he’s used to your noise, but you suppose at some point he also grew used to your quiet, too. maybe that’s just what decade-long friendships are like. you learn the usuals, the unusuals, and all of the in between. 

teeth gnawing at your lower lip, you wonder if he knows about the guy who’s been hovering around sky. this guy who sky doesn’t want to introduce to you, not yet, which means he’s important enough to her that she cares whether you meet him or not. whether because your opinion matters or because of something else, you haven’t figured out yet. 

taehyung’s eyes rise to meet yours, chopsticks halfway to his mouth when he sees the way you gaze at him thoughtfully, head tilted to the side. your brows are drawing in, and he wants to press his fingers to the crease in the middle, undo the tension, but instead he just asks, “something up?” 

you hesitate. for just a fraction of a second, but he catches it. because that’s what decade-long friendships are like. but you’re too quick for him to push it, too easily pull on a smile and reach over to tug on his ear like he’s still a child, nagging at him. “i’m fine,” you admonish. “don’t you worry about me, kid.” 

he grumbles something incoherent and swats at your hand, grumbles bordering on whines when you don’t let up, until he catches you grinning at him, mischievous as ever. you retract your hand, satisfied by the grumpy look on his face, though your smile falters a little when you see that it’s not enough to wipe the worry in his eyes. 

you focus on your food instead, just so you can avoid that look. but you can still feel him staring at you, like he’s waiting for you to give in to him, so you lift your head back up with a beam and start rattling off, extensively, until he loses that look in his eyes. until he’s back to just regular taehyung, sky’s little brother taehyung, neighbor from across the street taehyung, and not grown-up taehyung, walks you home taehyung, eats with you weekly because he doesn’t want you to be lonely taehyung. 

you’re not ready to admit it. taehyung’s only gotten more handsome and charming in his own right over the years. it makes it so that you can’t stand the way that he looks at you sometimes, like he can see right through you. 

he’s not supposed to. he’s taehyung. he’s part of your safe, little bubble; the one you built, where the sun can only shine. 

.

.

.

waking up is such a miserable experience, you muse. 

it’s ass o’clock in the morning. honestly, any time you need to wake up before noon is ass o’clock, but you have to study for your exams and you have a help desk shift later too, so unfortunately, 7am it is. 

you force yourself to roll out of bed, look vaguely human-shaped (aka: wear respectable enough clothes), and lug yourself to the library. you could study in your room but you’re a weak bitch and the bed being two feet away is too strong a temptation. therefore: library. 

you find a corner to hide away in, scribbling away in your notebook in hopes of retaining an ounce of the information you’ve written down. the hours pass like that, and by some miracle, you don’t develop a stress-induced headache by the time you need to leave for your shift. 

you toss your belongings into your backpack, tugging it onto your back, a quite physical reminder of the weight on your shoulders. 

you don’t necessarily think that life is unkind to you. you just think everyone gets dealt their deck of cards, and yours happens to be slightly shittier. but hey, if you’re broke enough, you get free housing at the nicest set of apartments on campus, so you win some, you lose some, right? 

the losing part right now is the multi-set of jobs running you into the ground. between the restaurant, your help desk job, and the work-study program, it’s a miracle you haven’t failed any of your courses. 

you heave a sigh, letting yourself feel bad about it for a minute. you deserve at least that, in the quiet of the library this early in the morning, while most of campus is happily sleeping in on a saturday. 

‘most’ is the key word here. you should’ve known your best friend has the integrity of a monk, seeing as she’s at the library at nearly 10am on a weekend. 

you slink your way over to her, sneaking up behind her and slinging an arm over her shoulder, mouth already open to whisper-shout her name - that is, up until you spot the man standing before her. 

the smile slides off your face immediately. for someone at his towering size, he’d been pretty well hidden behind the shelves. he looks suspiciously close in height to the person you’d seen that night at the restaurant, and the other day when you’d brought sky lunch. 

he smiles politely at you, dimples denting in his cheeks. your frown deepens. you’re certain now, that you don’t recognize him in your catalog of sky’s acquaintances, and she seems comfortable around him, much more than she is around any of her classmates. 

“hi, sun,” sky greets, gentle smile rising to her lips, though you’re too busy sizing up this guy she’s talking to. he’s sort of huge. he has kind eyes, though, hair swept off to the side, white tee tucked loosely into light colored jeans. but you still stand wary, too familiar with boys who have sweet dispositions and not enough good intentions. 

see, the first thing anyone notices about sky is that she’s nice. 

well, okay. the first thing most people notice about sky is that she’s pretty. elegant, like she was a princess in some past life, between her perpetual good posture (what college student do you know that isn’t hunched over like a gremlin at least 73% of the time?) and perfectly set hair, not a strand out of place. she’s pretty, in a way that carries into her personality, patient and open. she’s always listened to whatever blown-out-of-proportion story you have for her, letting you drag her into any and all of your bad ideas, no matter the consequences. 

the point is that sky holds the sort of kindness that knows no boundaries. she’s content to go with the flow, and despite all the times she’s been let down by passing acquaintances who you’ve ensured can no longer call her a friend, she’s still willing to help. she gives out second, third, fourth chances, doesn’t let the hurt get in the way of her ability to care. 

her walls don’t go up as high as yours do. so you make every effort to make sure that the people who take advantage of that never get a chance to hurt her. 

“who’s this?” 

sky blinks, looking between you and him. christ, he is massive. his biceps are probably the size of your head. 

you mostly keep your eyes on him, but turn to glance at sky when she takes a minute longer than usual to answer. she looks a bit startled, like she’s just now realizing you’re actually here; moreover, that you don’t know who her new friend is. 

“oh,” she says, lips turning downwards a little, conflicted. something inside you flinches. but then her expression clears and she smiles. “this is namjoon. we have class together.” 

namjoon lifts a hand to wave even while you’re narrowing your eyes at him. but still, your hands return to your pockets and you take a step back, forcing your stiff shoulders to lower. 

you’re intruding, you realize. sky is having a moment with this tall, handsome person who could probably twist you into a pretzel if he wanted to, and you’re intruding. 

a weight sits on your chest at the realization, but you force a smile to your face for sky. you and your reputation and your trust issues need to step out of this. 

“i.. i gotta get to work,” you say, anxious hands tugging at your backpack straps just for something to hold onto. “i just popped by ‘cause i saw you.” you glance towards namjoon, trying your best to maintain the smile you generally reserve only for close friends, but it turns too quickly into a grimace so you settle for a curt nod of acknowledgement, before lifting a hand to sky. “see you ‘round.”

you pretend not to notice how sky’s expression falters, heading out without turning around once. the discomfort rolls over in you, pulling at your heart, keeping your shoulders tense. 

the way sky looks at namjoon is different. you can tell. two minutes in the same space, and you know sky isn’t just being polite like she was raised to be. she’s content to be around him, their eyes darting to meet each other in quick glances, like it’s difficult to let their gazes stray for too long. 

namjoon doesn’t give you any immediate warning signs, and sky’s gotten a lot better at picking her friends. you don’t have to protect her, she’s perfectly capable of it herself. but you still feel wary, still worry that dimpled, unassuming namjoon will fuck her over like any number of people have in the past. 

including you, your brain reminds you. you’re the worst one. 

your heart tightens in your chest and you shoulder your way out the doors of the library, like barreling into something will shake off the memory any easier. 

high school is hard for anyone. emotions are at all time highs; everything feels like it’s high stakes. grades, friendships, romances. everything is always, constantly, on the line. 

sky always says it’s not your fault. kim seokjin was not your fault. you were teenagers - kids, really - but no matter how she spins it, you know you’re the one who messed up. even if sky doesn’t blame you, you still do. 

how are you supposed to trust your instincts, when the last time you let your guard down for a boy with a disarming smile, he hurt not only you, but your best friend? 

sky’s your most important person. her family was there when no one else was, and they didn’t ask questions, either. you don’t think you’ll forgive yourself for letting her down once, and you know you can’t afford to let it happen again. no matter how many times sky says you’ve never had anything to apologize for. 

you’re so lost in your own head that you almost bump into someone, so wound up that you nearly fire off immediately before realizing it’s taehyung standing in front of you, looking equal parts amused and concerned. “i think i know what they mean now when they say, ‘blaze a path,’” he muses, and you scoff at him, shoving him to the side without any real force. 

“walking with purpose is not what that metaphor means, tae,” you keep marching forward, not bothering to check if he’s matching pace. he’s got long legs, he’ll be fine. “‘blazing a path’ means-” 

“sun,” taehyung interrupts, voice low enough that you actually stop lecturing him. his voice softens a little. “you alright? you look like-” 

you don’t let him finish, nor give him the courtesy of even a glance his way. “i’m dandy, taetae. just going to my nine to five.” 

“you don’t have a nine to five. you’re a student.” 

“good job, einstein. wanna tell me how the sky is blue, too?” 

“sun.” 

you know you’re being curt. you’re lashing out at the wrong person and you stop in your steps to breathe in deeply, exhaling slowly. 

“i’m just tired,” you finally spare him a look. you sigh. “i’m sorry. but i really do have to go to work, and if i don’t haul ass, i’m gonna be late.” 

he looks at you like he doesn’t believe you, but you both know he’s going to drop it. “you should sleep more,” he settles on. you know he’s about to lecture you with a series of hard facts. “people need eight hours-” 

you smirk at him, “you know damn well there’s not a single college student out there getting eight hours of sleep.” 

he shrugs. “maybe the business majors?” 

you snort. “no. they’re out partying.” 

he snaps his fingers. “right. forgot about those.” 

“you can forget about parties when your best friend is jimin?” you ask in mock amazement. he scoffs out a laugh in return. 

“shut up, sun. i’m serious, you need more sleep. you look like death.” 

“oooh,” you tease. “you really know how to make a girl feel pretty.” 

taehyung turns his gaze skyward, and you know he’s asking some higher being for the patience to put up with you. you snicker, patting him on the arm. “you’ll get it when you’re older,” you blink forlorn eyes at him, smile overly sympathetic. he scowls back. you make a vague attempt at hiding your amusement, but otherwise continue towards the office, taehyung keeping you company. he doesn’t say anything else, just walks with you. you don’t ask where he was supposed to be headed before you bumped into him, and he doesn’t tell you, either. 

it’s when you’re almost at the door that you break your silence, that nagging feeling pulling and pulling at you until you crack. “hey,” you spin towards him, stopping in your tracks right in front of the building. “do you know a namjoon?” 

he tilts his head, surprised. “namjoon? yeah, he’s like uhh,” taehyung pauses to think. “i think he was sky’s project partner or something, and now they’re pretty good friends. they have class together. why?” 

you make a noncommittal noise. “nothing. just saw them together earlier. sky’s never brought him up before.” 

you try not to think too hard at the way taehyung’s eyebrows shoot up. it’s a sign that you’re not overthinking this, that it is weird that sky never mentioned him, because sky tells you everything. 

but she didn’t tell you about namjoon. 

masterlist | part one | part two | part three | part four | part five | epilogue

[spilledmilkfkdies]

Dunno if anyone asked this but like…Wizard redemption arcs?

I’ve got my own takes on them as well for my rewrite:

-Orgon would never, too goal-oriented

-Anagan probs would through Flora

-Duman’s a 50/50, he’ll probs stick with his band

-Gantlos is a wild card arsonist but I believe he can do it, may take a lot of time though (90% of this is headcannon skcjskxjsk-)

But those are my takes what about yours?

Idk this is kinda hard because like?? Not to be a stinky wizard apologist I am, but I like a bit of "you both suck wtf happened here bro" in my planet history, which makes a clear cut redemption a bit more difficult ig?? Like in whose eyes are they being redeemed? The fairies' who were also very much morally bouncy? Or uh maybe the audience idk- I forgive em.

That being said though, depending on if you try to tackle the whole group at once or take it one at a time, it could both be interesting.

I've had thoughts where you have Ogron, Gantlos and Anagan: No Circle (object), no Duman, half their powers if not a quarter, washed up and heavily in mourning- At that point just. Talk to them. They're in no position for a full on revenge spree, they are SAD, they're weak. Either just leave them be or talk them into joining a cause for mutual and equal benefits, then if they ever do get back to full strength they'll simply not bother you again. Rough concept kinda, but yeah. Side note that in this timeline, if Duman does eventually claw his way outta the Gardenia grave, he's not going to be happy. Actually maybe giving the washed up wizards their Duman back would do all the work by itself? They'd show genuine gratitude and Duman wouldn't be allowed to be mad. Win win.

Then we have one by one, many many many possibilities there too. Like the best order? There isn't one. Several delicious routes, some more difficult than others. Play onto Gantlos following Ogron to the ends of the world, Anagan already having been mentally done with the hunt for ages- Does modern day Ogron care deeply enough about the others to put their well being and safety above their goals? Or at least more so than early days/in his prime Ogron who CANNOT relate. Again, don't put Duman last though. Cornered animal core fr I'm so serious. Which is where my pLANS COME IN- jkjk

[io-lu-art]

just a looong ramble analysing and rethinking Rey's character and turning whatever conclusions I get to into my headcanon without changing any plot points in TFA because I don't have the energy for that....

First things first. With everything I write here and publish on my blog from now on I refuse to believe that TROS ever existed. Everyone is free to have their personal opinions as long as they don't harass or hate on anyone, and this is mine. Almost every choice in that movie has left me scarred, even up til now, 4 years after its release. I thought I can ignore it, like any other healthy human being, but - oh boy, I cannot. If you are interested in reading another ramble on that, here's the post.

Since I am writing my own take on what could happen after TLJ (you may call it a fanfiction, I'm gonna call it a fanscript since that's gonna be its format), this post serves the purpose of getting my head clear around what's the deal with Rey, analysing, and lying down a solid foundation for my WIP. The story I'm writing has barely reached the end of Act I (out of III) at the moment I am composing this commentary, and I constantly notice that I get stuck with Rey's character every time I have to think about her for different reasons I will address down below.

I will make some rewrites as I see fit and necessary along the way for her character to make sense to me. All rewrites are in Tumblr's

chat style

This post will be linked to my AO3 fancifction as a reference for people to understand how I treat her character as soon as that one will be finished... *clears her throat* ...ANYWAY-

Let's have a look at Rey, shall we?

Rey's introduction.

When we first meet Rey, there is already a lot we get to learn about her. She's a scavenger. On a pretty much deserted desert planet. Water and food are scarce. She gathers parts during the day to sell them in exchange for food rations.

She has no friends, no family. She's lonely. And has been for quite a while. And yet, though hard, it looks like a pretty peaceful and stable life. If it were significantly different, we would have gotten introduction scenes of her battling some gangs or other scavengers for parts or something. But instead we were provided with beautiful, peaceful cinematography and John Williams' incredible score.

She manages. She manages because she has to and has never known to do otherwise. This on its own is already a very solid introduction. And it becomes even more powerful as we are provided with additional context later on, as she tells BB-8 that she's waiting for her family.

We know who she is, what she does and what she wants. No more questions, right?

Well, this is where it gets confusing, at least for me: there's one shot in Rey's introduction which always leaves me puzzled about her actual wants. It's the moment she puts on the rebel pilot helmet.

Maybe I am reading too much into it, but it feels like it kinda wants to draw parallels to Luke Skywalker in ANH? What exactly is the purpose of this shot? Is she putting on the helmet just for fun? Is it to show that she is still a kid inside? She seems to enjoy herself. Is it to show us that she maybe wants to be a pilot...? The gesture on its own is too little information to imply that, let alone that she already is a very skilled one, so probably no. Then, is it, perhaps, to show us that she dreams of more? Like Luke, who wanted to get off the planet that is "farthest away from the bright center of the universe"?

The interpretations, especially when looking at it in context to the rest of the movie could go on and on and on.

Quick detour.

The reason it works so well with Luke's character is because from the very beginning, with everything he does and says, it is perfectly clear that he doesn't want to stay on Tatooine. It's his only want when we first meet him.

Luke has friends who tell him about the galaxy. He seeks adventure.

And he's very impatient about it.

Everything he says basically SCREAMS how much he hates it there.

Now back to Rey.

Am I expecting Rey to show the same interest in getting off Jakku with the same attitude and level of energy as Luke, should that have been what TFA was going for? No, of course not. They are (supposed to be) two different characters after all. But I do believe that, given the setup, that helmet scene leaves too much room for confusing and unnecessary interpretation. (More so because I am trying my best to avoid nostalgia bait wherever I can.)

I am not denying the fact that she wouldn't have heard about the wider galaxy, that she wouldn't wonder about what it would feel like, being out there. People travel. And with people traveling, so do stories. So if you want to hint at that, do it subtly, all the while keeping the focus on her biggest want.

I might really just be reading too much into it, but still, in my humble opinion, a way to solve this confusion is cutting out her interaction with the pilot helmet completely. Let me demonstrate.

Inside her home we already see this self-made rebel pilot puppet. Just like the puppet lying around, instead of having her pick it up and putting it on,

the helmet remains part of the environment, stuck in the sand. There could even be a close-up on it as Rey puts down her empty plate next to it when she has finished eating if you really want to show it. She then rests her arms on her knees and looks up into the sky, following the ship that has just departed from the far outpost into the high atmosphere until it disappears. Waiting.

What is achieved by changing the interaction with the helmet is that it keeps her wants just as clear as Luke's. Luke wants adventure. She wants her family back. Period.

...I rewatched this scene after writing these paragraphs and yes, I admit, in the end it happens so fast that one could probably just let it pass and interpret it as Rey being very bored and using it as entertainment to wait out the days. But even if it were just that, the effects this little tweak would have on the following scenes is quite interesting to look at nonetheless.

The tweak I am going with from now on: Having her not actively wonder about possible adventures at all. She doesn't believe those stories to actually be true, because she's never allowed herself to. She's never allowed herself to actually want to ever leave Jakku.

What would it mean for her characterisation? It would make her slightly more serious and grounded. And the movie (except for the helmet scene) actually already treats her that way. Notice how she, while fixing BB-8's antenna, takes a moment to look at him before asking:

She's never seen such a droid before. At least not in such good condition. So, of course, she's curious. But when BB-8 says it's classified, she only laughs about it. "Classified? Really? Me too. Big secret," as if to say, haha, yeah, right. She rejects that possibility. And she doesn't bother asking any further, because when she is confronted with the choice to go and explore, she is reminded of her promise to herself, which is that she will wait for her family until they return.

Now, here is where I insert some very subtle "rewriting". When Rey first meets Finn, she is suspicious of him...

...and should actually remain suspicious,

instead of admiring him and falling into this, let's call it, "excited, fangirly smile"...

She doesn't know him. She has no reason to trust him. Instead, the tone of this line should be one that reflects her emotions as it slowly gets to her that those stories she's been hearing about might actually have some truth to them, that there might actually be a wider world out there. So make her be gradually interested.

Huh. This man I just forcefully hit to the ground, a Resistance fighter, knows about BB-8 and his classified information. What are the odds of that?

"So you're with the Resistance?" Rey asks suspiciously, looking down at the man.

The man stands up, brushes the sand and dust off his jacket and answers, "Obviously. Yes, I am. I am with the Resistance."

Rey frowns, "I've never met a Resistance fighter before," scanning him with her eyes. Why would there be any on Jakku? Nothing ever happens here.

"Oh, this is what we look like, some of us. Others look different."

Rey cannot help a little smile at his strange attitude. She looks back to where BB-8 rolled off to. Puzzled, she tells him, "BB-8 says he's on a secret mission. He has to get back to your base..." Even hearing herself pronounce that out loud feels so surreal to her. None of this makes any sense. Why-

"Apparently he has a map that leads to Luke Skywalker and everyone's after it."

What? "Luke Skywalker?" she asks, confounded.

CUT TO ACTION.

Whether she wants it or not, the plot forces her into the stories she's been hearing of. You don't want to believe they are real? They're real, all right. She has no choice but to run and get along. And later, she does get more and more interested, specifically when she meets Han Solo, the legend himself. Her whole beliefs turn upside down. It's exciting and she embraces it. Why? She's made a promise to BB-8 that she will get him home, and those things kinda come hand in hand.

Rey's physicality.

Rey is very fast to jump into action. She doesn't think twice about what she's doing. She just acts. Because that's how she's learned to survive all this time on her own. When she but hears BB-8 struggling in the distant sand dunes the first time they meet, she immediately reacts and goes to help (which also shows how compassionate she is towards people - and droids - in need of help).

And she's incredibly stubborn about it. If I may even word it like this: it's something she carries with pride.

So she's a good fighter. And I have but one request: DO. NOT. FORGET. THAT. HER. FIGHTING. STYLE. IS. ROUGH. AND. DIRTY. AND. HAS. NO. TECHNIQUE. WHATSOEVER. WHILE. THE. STORY. PROGRESSES. OK? Ok. What else? Ah, yes. Piloting. I don't know which of the two aspects has brought more uproar in the SW community, with the addition of the Force to these 2 points making people call her a Mary Sue, her being overpowered and so on. Let's have a look at that.

Rey's piloting skills.

She obviously knows her way around the Falcon. And it's plausible. "This ship hasn't flown in years!" It's been there for quite a while. Maybe she has had the opportunity to sneak onto it once. What about her flying skills? Well, that takeoff definitely had me worried. At this point I am even amazed this ship is still all in one piece. Which has me thinking... just a thought...

While trying to get those TIEs off their tail, Rey damages a visibly big part of the Falcon's exterior. "Ups," she comments, hastily checking the controls. Ok... The ship still flies. All good.

"What was that?" Finn calls from the gunner position, seriously worried for their lives.

"Nothing to worry about!" Rey quickly shouts back. All in all, the flight is messy as hell, and the Falcon needs some heavy repairs. But they still manage to get out.

"Nice shooting!"

"That was some flying! How did you do that?"

"Thanks! I don't know! I've flown some ships, but I've never left the planet."

(This is me reacting to their dialogue in the new context:) Yeah, guys, good work! You've almost destroyed the Falcon in the process, but you're alive, so I guess it's fiiiiiine.

What am I going for here? Adding to their level of expectations, which are... pretty low, and hopefully Rey's likability.

And then, later, Han is horrified of the state his ship is in, "Who did that?" Rey doesn't answer his question, but instead immediately offers her help, "I can fix that for you," feeling a bit ashamed of handling the ship of a legend this carelessly. And Han is... well, Han about it.

When would the Falcon get those repairs, you might ask? Eh, *hand gesture* there's plenty of time on D'Quar for that while they discuss how to blow up the third Deathst- *clears her throat* Starkiller Base. And obviously it's not gonna be Rey doing those repairs.

This addition tones down her abilities, puts more focus on her skills as a scavenger and makes her more relatable. I'd also argue that it puts more weight to her decision to eventually decline Han's offer to join the crew because of her wants. You see, once immersed into the real thing, the stories becoming true, meeting the legends, she becomes genuinely curious. She asks questions. Why did Luke leave? What fight? She gets incredibly excited when Han offers her a job. And yet, despite all, she still wants to go back.

Nevertheless, Rey displays pretty amazing piloting skills under those stressful circumstances on Jakku. After all, flying the Falcon is....

Her instincts are implacable. One might even say that she*

She just isn't aware of it yet. It is not until some scenes with Han and the rathtars later that we get the first hint.

The Force.

Now I might be wrong, but I have a theory, which is that the piloting performance under high pressure on Jakku might have been it. The Awakening.

The Force calls to Rey through Luke's lightsaber. And she listens to it, not knowing what will follow. She experiences the Force vision, and is horrified.

"That lightsaber was Luke's, and his father's before him, and now, it calls to you!"

"I have to get back to Jakku." Again.

Even when Maz tells her, "You already know the truth. Whomever your waiting for on Jakku, they are never coming back,"

she still refuses to believe that.

Tears run down her cheeks

and she shakes her head. No.

"But there's someone who still could."

Rey frowns. What is Maz implying there? "Luke?" she asks and realises what it's leading up to, and doesn't like it. Her emotions are a mess. She gulps back and keeps shaking her head as Maz speaks.

"The belonging you seek is not behind you. It is ahead. I am no Jedi, but I know the Force. [...] The light. Feel it. [...] The lightsaber. Take it."

Rey doesn't want to hear of it. Any of it.

"I am never touching that thing again!"

Rey just witnessed complete horror. She is in denial. Keep in mind her clear wants from the beginning of the movie. Ideally her want for her parents to come back should be replaced by the character fulfilling her needs at the end of her arc. But we're not nearly there yet. What Maz tells her about the Force completely contradicts Rey's experiences. She cannot just accept the truth. And how does she handle it? She runs away. She's terrified.

She wants to go back to the way things were before any of this mess started. But the plot doesn't let her run away that easily. It knows she has to face her fears, one being her fear of the Force and one the fear of perhaps never making it back to Jakku ever again.

It forces her further into these situations, making it impossible for her to get out of them. She's trapped. Literally and figuratively. And fighting her way out won't work this time, the one ability she always relied on to save herself. It's her darkest moment. And if that were not enough, Kylo Ren, this stranger, this man inside that mask, the man from her vision, shoves all her insecurities right into her face.

"And Han Solo." Rey jolts up. Either out of fear of possibly betraying Han and slipping, giving away a location, or out of rage that Kylo has gone too far into her personal space. Either way, this rage gives her some strength to oppose him. "You feel like he's the father you never had. He would have disappointed you."

"Get out of my head!" He backs away for his own reasons, not wanting to think any more of his father, but still holds onto her mind. Rey does all she can to withstand him, and the longer she does, the more time it gives her to understand what is going on.

And Kylo senses it. What he's trying to do here is not working. Concern washes over his face, which makes him lose control over the situation. The connection opens, inviting Rey to tap into his mind. She's inside his head. Now she understands. She understands she can use this power on him, too. So she does.

And there it is. She's strong with the Force.

And that's intentional. Why? For reasons we discover in TLJ and numerous other fanfictions. (TROS? w-what's that-)

She has found a way out of the situation. Now, has she ever heard of Jedi mind tricks? Maybe? But remember what she just discovered: She just tapped into Kylo's mind. So she tries that again on the stormtrooper. Because when she knows how to act, she just does. She's always been confident in her physical abilities and skills. Why would she have to treat this new power any different? And luckily it works, after 3 tries.

And that's fine. Let's move on. Kylo kills Han. Explosions.

Notice this. Even though she knows she now has these new powers, the same powers Kylo has, she still draws her blaster at him after calling him a monster. She acts on emotion and choses the quick, familiar way.

I actually like to believe that Rey really doesn't know what the Force is and how it works, at all. How would she? Yes, Maz did tell her about it, but how do Force-powers manifest in people? She's never seen anyone use it before, upon meeting Kylo Ren. So in every scene she does use it, she just copies Kylo. That's the only reference she has. Remember how proud she is of her physical abilities. And she is so naive that she just goes and tries it for herself, without thinking of whether it will work out or not. And it works out for her. Because, again, she is strong in the Force.

It's true that her flaw, her naivety, is not really addressed in TFA. It never really backlashes on her. And, to be completely honest, I have no idea how to make room for that without some heavier rewrites yet. But maybe it's not necessary. TLJ takes care of that. TFA just introduces us to Rey as a character after all.

Now, is the force-summoned lightsaber making her overpowered? If you interpret it as "Kylo couldn't get that thing out the snow but Rey could," then yes, yes it is. BUT, if you see it as "while Rey is observing the fight, she sees Kylo trying to summon it, so she copies him, the way she copied him with the mind-tapping, and reaches for it the moment Kylo conveniently gets it out of the snow for her," I don't think it is, though I do agree that in order for the second version to be true, the scene happens too fast with too little shots to explain it. *OP takes a breath* So, here is what I suggest:

Kylo reaches out for the lightsaber. SHOT of the lightsaber in the snow, fidgeting slightly. BACK TO Kylo, pulling anew. BACK TO the lightsaber. It gets free. CUT. Another shot of it flying through the air towards the camera.

SHOT on Rey witnessing that - she is already on her feet again - and immediately reaching for it as well, outstretching her arm towards it.

SHOT of Kylo as he feels the momentum of his pull shift and dodges out of the way. The lightsaber flies past him, into Rey's hand.

Rey has always been fast to react to action. So it would make sense for her to be able to do that. Ok. Now to the fight itself.

*sighs* I don't even know where to start. ...One thing's for sure. Kylo at this point is pretty much destroyed emotionally from having killed his father, but he's still big and strong and aggressive in his movements. Rey, on the other hand, kinda seamlessly knows how to handle a lightsaber, which... is definitely not believable at all.

Let's step back for a moment. Why do we have this fight? Rey needs to get Finn and herself out of there and Kylo is pretty much in the way, so she wants to eliminate the problem. And what does Kylo want? Sure, he is interested in Rey and her raw powers which eventually adds up to them being equals in the Force, so he doesn't want to kill her...

But he also wants that lightsaber, doesn't he?

(God, I am looking at this fight to find any clues and I'm just sitting here, elbows on the table, resting my head in my hands, massaging my temples, wondering, "why the hell are there so many cuts in that fight scene?") (I am no expert in fight choreography, so bare with me as I try to make this work.)

Rey is the one who draws first at him.

She has never wielded a lightsaber before, but knows how to handle a staff... so she treats the lightsaber like a staff within its limitations.

Because remember, HER. STYLE. OF. FIGHTING. IS. ROUGH. AND. DIRTY. AND. HAS. NO. TECHNIQUE. WHATSOEVER. So, pretend we have some well thought out choreography in this part.

Kylo blocks her with ease. Rey is frustrated. The lightsaber feels heavy and difficult to handle. It doesn't take long for Kylo to

get her cornered at the edge of the newly formed cliff.

"You need a teacher! I could show you the ways of the Force!" he exclaims.

Rey considers, out of breath, "The Force?" Rey takes a moment as her mind connects the dots. So that's what these new powers are? Kylo watches her, waits for her to make a move. No time for pondering about the Force any more. Rey moves. Kylo LETS her duck and free herself from his block. She runs, backs away from the crater. He follows her. He outstretches his arm. Rey is stuck. She's literally petrified. Again. Kylo draws nearer. He twirls his saber, now holding it backwards (you know, Ahsoka style). "No," she hisses through her teeth, struggling. Heavy breaths. She closes her eyes. When he almost touches her hand holding the lightsaber, "No!" she RESISTS his force-cage and GOES FREE.

Because, you see, even though Maz told her to "close her eyes" and "feel the light", Rey has never done that before, and when under stress, I do believe she would rather choose a quick, familiar way to get out of the situation. The only thing she knows how to do with the Force at this point is to copy or resist Kylo. She wouldn't know how to to draw power from the Force, yet. She'll have plenty of time to learn that from Luke later, should she survive this fight, so we better continue.

Kylo stumbles back as she draws at him. Rey goes for a swing to hit from above, which Kylo manages to block last second, bringing his lighsaber up from behind his back. As their lightsabers are crossed again he quickly reaches for her right hand, which is holding Luke's saber, with his left hand and moves it aside to his right towards the ground, using his crossguard for more momentum to force her down. He steps his left foot accordingly to keep himself stable. Rey cries out from the unexpected movement. They are kinda back to back. His left shoulder against her right one. The position is uncomfortable. He squeezes Rey's wrist. Rey cries out in pain. Then, she realises how close they are.

Time for some close combat, ladies and gentlemen.

She gives in and lets go of the lightsaber, lets it fall to the ground. Kylo releases her to reach for the fallen lightsaber. But before he can pick it up, Rey KICKS his left hand away with her right heel and PUNCHES his JAW with her right elbow from below. Kylo's head rocks back. He stumbles backwards from the harsh impact, causing him to turn his back to her in order to catch himself. Rey summons Luke's lightsaber back into her left hand, and ignites it. When Kylo turns back to his opponent, left and unprotected side first, Rey is ready to stab him in his left shoulder.

Kylo stumbles back some more, she brings her hands together for another strike leftwards, he barely blocks it, he stumbles back some more, it leaves his posture open, Rey strikes again, rightwards, lower this time, wounding his leg, he falls to his knee, leaving Rey the final blow to provide him with his scar.

The reason I started writing this entire ramble in the first place is a conversation I had with my friend which brought up the fact that Rey should be able to beat Kylo by using her rough, unpredictable moves. Shout out to my friend who, bless her, is willing to listen to and survives every one of my sw rants and who pointed this out in the first place!

Is this a good fightscene now? I have no idea. I hope so? I do have it very clear in my head now though, so I might go and have some fun storyboarding it in the nearest future.

You know the rest. The ground splits, she runs to Finn, Chewie picks them up. . . .

There are some more moments which I believe need some tweaks, like the meeting with Leia, which is just so unfair to Chewie, really, but if I go on and on about this, I would end up changing the entire movie, which I do not have the strength for atm. This ramble was supposed to be about Rey and her alone, so I am done here.

I guess in the end Rey does realise her needs and is able to let her wants aside for a bit longer and focus her hope on actually helping the Resistance and get Luke. Hope that, with finding Luke, she will get to understand these new powers. I do feel like the movie could have provided us with a more emotionally rich reactive scene to the fight and her abilities, and generally just more of those, but then, what am I expecting from a JJ Abrams film? We have Rian for that.

My conclusion? I'm bad with conclusions and summaries, so here you have it, my take on Rey by only adding to the existing dialogue, changing some attitudes here and there, adding a scene, and changing the fight sequence at the end and how she treats the Force.

I do have a clearer understanding of her character now, which was the entire purpose of this ramble, so I guess, mission accomplished. Congratulations on having made it till the end. It was a long ride. I did consider splitting this beast into 2 parts, but while writing this, at one point I just decided to fully commit to it.

You are totally free to, of course, agree with me and stay tuned for my WIP fanscript or disagree, never read through this thing ever again, ignore it and leave it to die on Tumblr's graveyard.

Before you ask, because I also considered doing that just for the sake of having fun with GIFs on Tumblr (all text gifs are taken from YARN btw), I will not do a post like this on TLJ, since I have no problems with Rey's character there at all. Props to Rian Johnson at this point, for managing to make sense of her with what TFA gave us.

[goldvenuslvrs]

Love At First Injury

Summary: When Kiara went for a walk on the beach, she didn’t expect to meet the love of her life. she didn’t expect to get knocked off her feet by a volleyball either.

Pairing: Kiara Carrera x fem!plus sized!reader

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: meet cute, reader has hair long enough to tuck behind your ears, lowkey jjcleopope (if you read into it), kinda insta love/love at first sight (but they’re teenagers so it’s not that far fetched), kiara being kinda insecure

Author’s Note: round part of rewriting old imagines lol 

Never let it be said that Kiara Carrera didn’t absolutely adore her friends. 

However, as much as she loved them, she needed time away. There were plenty of ways that she chose to relax and catch her breath.

Surfing, of course.

She found that helping out at the Wreck certainly let her push her racing thoughts to the back of her mind for a little while. 

Her favourite way to relax was to simply walk up and down the length of the beach with a pair of earphones in and completely ignore the world for an hour or two.

In that one hour, she didn’t need to listen to John B try and convince her that his dad was still alive and still searching for the gold. She didn’t have to exert all her energy on pulling JJ away from his next fight or listening to Pope fret and agonise over the interview for his scholarship (which she thought was ridiculous because it’s Pope, he’s obviously going to get it!).

For just a few hours, she had a little respite from the chaos of her friends.

Although the volleyball flying directly towards her face seemed to have other plans regarding how her day would go, the unexpected force knocked her off her feet onto the sand and she watched the ball bounce off toward the main road. 

She would’ve been unbelievably pissed if it wasn’t for the girl running up to her, already spewing apologies. Her thoughts had violently shifted from ‘what the fuck’ to ‘oh my god, pretty girl’. She took the extended hand that the girl had offered and she couldn’t help but let her eyes briefly rake up and down her frame.

It wasn’t often that Kiara was unaware of how to react to something or someone but there was something about this girl that made her feel different in a way that the boys she’d been with before had never made her feel simply by looking at her. Before she could lose herself in comparing her past lovers to the girl in front of her, whose name she didn’t even know, she was pulled to her feet and now stood at almost eye-level with the girl.

“Hi,” You smiled and Kiara felt her legs go weak, “I’m really sorry about that.”

“Yeah, you’ve said,” She laughed, shaking her head in an attempt to regain a sliver of composure, “About a million times.”

“I’m Y/N, and those,” You said, seemingly slightly nervous, and gestured to the small group behind you that were watching and doing an incredibly bad job of pretending that they weren’t, “Are the idiots that I call my friends, who evidently can’t aim to save their lives.”

Kiara couldn’t help but laugh when you raised your voice at the latter part of your sentence, clearly wanting your friends to overhear. It was clear that they had, seeing as their mouths dropped open in indignation and they huffed, migrating towards the blanket they had set out, “Kiara but everyone calls me Kie, I don’t think we’ve met before.”

“I just moved here a couple of weeks ago, my parents got a new job working for the Thorntons,” You grimaced. She guessed you had already met Topper and been acquainted with his wonderful personality. 

Kiara let the silence hang for a moment, feeling her palms begin to sweat, “Do you want to hang out? I’m meeting up with my friends soon, you and friends can join if you want to?” Although she would be more than okay with your friends joining, Kiara silently prayed that they wouldn’t want to.

She was almost certain that the resulting smile that spread across your face could’ve blinded her.

“Sure,” You said, glancing back towards your friends who had once again become invested in a game of volleyball, “I’ll just let them know I’m leaving, they seem pretty into the game.”

It was clear to both of you that it was a bullshit excuse but neither of you could bring yourself to insist that they accompany you.

Kiara stood there, kind of awkwardly, as you headed back towards your friends. She noted the way in which each of their gazes briefly flickered to her and back to you, sending you a teasing smirk, before they nodded and waved you off again.

“Ready to go, Kie?” You asked as soon as you were close enough, with your bag hitched over your shoulder.

She nodded and turned around, expecting you to follow her. Walking down the road, the excitement and nervousness emanating from you and Kiara was palpable. 

Kiara had warned you that her friends could be a little… chaotic but nothing could have prepared you for the sight you were greeted with when you arrived at the ‘Chateau’ (what a weird name). 

There were two boys wrestling on the ground in front of a handful of hammocks. “That’s JJ and Pope,” She had informed you, “They’re pretty much in love but they won’t admit it.”

There was a girl with dirty blonde hair and tanned skin lounging on one of the hammocks near them, laughing out loud, cheering on ‘Pope’ and betting ‘JJ’ that he wouldn’t win. “That’s Sarah.”

“Cameron?” You had asked. You had heard her name once or twice when you were getting settled in. 

“Yep, it’s a long story.”

There was another girl sharing the hammock with Sarah who was smiling over at the wrestling boys with a certain softness in her eyes, “That’s Cleo,” Kiara explained, “She’s new as well, she’s only been here a few months.”

Kiara pointed out John B last. He was laying on the other hammock, his arm thrown over his eyes and quite obviously trying to ignore his friends’ antics. 

You couldn’t help but laugh at the sight of them. Your outburst accidentally gained the attention of the group of rowdy teenagers who all lifted their heads and watched you wander over. 

JJ was the first to greet you, he seemed to radiate chaotic energy so you figured that you’d probably get along with him more than most if you stuck around. “Well,” He said mischievously, “Hi-”

“No!” Kiara yelled, crossing her arms over her chest, which prompted laughter from the rest of the group, “I like this one, don’t ruin it with your slutty tendencies!”

The pogues shared a weighted look between themselves. They had a feeling that it wasn’t just your friendship that Kiara was after, she was usually one to be pretty subtle when it came to the people she was interested in but everyone could see the heart eyes she was currently giving you.

You were quickly pulled into a conversation with Sarah, who demanded to know where you bought your shorts from, and John B, who told you to ignore any of JJ’s advances. 

Kiara was trying her hardest to focus on the tale JJ was regaling her and Pope with but she couldn’t help but allow her gaze to drift back to you every now and then. She knew that you would get along with the pogues, you seemed like the type of person to simply fit in every circumstance that you found yourself in. It wasn’t often that she brought someone back and even less often that she brought someone back that vibed with her friends so well.

As happy as she was, she couldn’t help but feel worried. She knew first-hand how charming her friends could be when they put their minds to it. She had a feeling that she didn’t have to worry about JJ, as flirty as he was, she knew he was more observant than he let on and he would never hurt her like that. John B and Sarah were disgustingly in love so she had no worries about them. 

Unfortunately, she had a feeling that she might have reason to worry about Pope and Cleo. Pope was the sweetest guy she had ever met and she could definitely see the potential he had to be ‘boyfriend material’ and Cleo, well, Kiara certainly wasn’t blind. 

She was still in conversation with JJ and Pope when it had begun to rain and everyone decided to migrate towards the deck, each claiming a piece of furniture. 

“Kie!” Sarah whisper-yelled, “I think we put her to sleep.”

Kiara looked down at Sarah’s lap and saw that you were dead asleep.

Sarah saw the look of adoration on her friend’s face and softly moved you so that you were laying on Kiara’s lap rather than her own.

The brunette lightly ran her fingers through your hair and brushed it out of your face. She shrugged and shot Sarah a quick smile, “I don’t blame her,” She chuckled, “We are a bit much, aren’t we?”

“I’m still not used to it,” Cleo quipped with a smirk.

“What’s the deal with you and her, then?” JJ blurted out curiously and pointedly ignored the elbow in the ribs (Pope) and glare (Sarah) that he was subjected to, “Do you like her?”

The pogues exchanged wary glances. It was a well know fact that Kiara wasn’t straight but she had never explicitly told them about her romantic preferences. She had always been adamant that ‘coming out’ was a ridiculous tradition.

“I don’t know,” Kiara sounded so small and shy. They had never heard her sound that before, “I don’t want to scare her off. It’s only been a day.”

“If we haven’t managed to send her running for the hills, I doubt you will,” John B said. He grabbed Sarah’s hand and pulled her up with him as he stood, “It’s late and I’ve got work tomorrow, we’re going to bed. You know where the keys are, lock up before you leave.”

Pope shared a look with JJ and Cleo before reluctantly standing up, “Dad will be on my ass if we’re not back soon.”

Pope and JJ walked on towards the Twinkie but Cleo stayed put for a moment, “Tell her,” She implored, “What’s the worst that could happen?”

Kiara wanted to scoff because isn’t that the age-old question? She may have only known you for a few hours but she feared what might happen and how devastating a rejection you could inflict on her. 

She sighed and waved her off. As soon as the van disappeared around the corner and she could no longer hear the roaring of the old, well-used engine, her gaze drifted back to you. 

As if you could feel her eyes on you, yours fluttered open and you turned your head to look up at her with a small, sleepy smile gracing your lips, “Hi,” You said quietly, clearing your throat and wiping your hands over your face and yawning, “How long was I out for?” You asked, sheepishly. 

Kiara laughed, throwing her head back, “About twenty minutes, everyone left.”

You tried not to focus on the heat that was rapidly spreading across your cheeks and hoped that she couldn’t sense or notice your embarrassment. “Sorry,” You mumbled, reluctantly sitting up and moving to rest beside her on the couch. You tucked your hair behind your ears and chuckled, “Honestly, I’m surprised none of you drew on me.”

“I’m not gonna lie to you, they wanted to, especially JJ,” She teased and took a deep breath, “But if you wanted to make it up to me for, you know, falling asleep when I so graciously introduced to my best friends, you could come by the Wreck tomorrow?”

“The Wreck?”

“It’s a restaurant that my dad runs, I work there,” She explained, “I finish at four if you wanted to come by.”

You made a contemplative look and smiled shyly, “Depends,” You teased, “Will it just be us or should I prepare to listen to Sarah explain, in detail, why John B should get his hair cut?”

She shook her head and grinned, reaching a hand out to clasp yours, “Just me and you…is that alright?”

You shrugged and shifted closer to her, softly rubbing the back of her hand with your thumb, “More than alright.”

an: again, i’m unbelievably bad at writing endings but any feedback is welcome, inbox is open for any requests <3

[onceuponaneverafter]

It's hard to get through Ouabh series when Jacks is focused on another girl. And the whole series is kinda about that. Also In Caraval, Jacks seems more caring and affectionate towards Tella than Evangeline. He's rude to Evangeline and yeah he may protect her but doesn’t he protect her because he needs her as a key to go back to Tella. And With the ending of Tbona, using the stones to save Evangeline, wasn't he already going to rewrite history by going back to Tella? I see people say that he went back in time to save Evangeline knowing the consequences but wasn’t he already going to do that for Tella?

hi anon! thank you for sending your thoughts! you make good points, and i agree, it does get frustrating to read about how focused he is on tella.

i personally look at his actions through the lens of his story, his feelings, and his beliefs - it isn’t a flawless perspective to the story and i’m not saying he’s always in the right, he certainly does make flawed decisions and downright terrible ones too, but i’ve found it interesting to try to understand what’s going on in his head even if it makes him do stupid things and clouds his reason.

basically since he kissed tella and she didn’t die, he’s been convinced that she’s the only chance he will ever have at love - he doesn’t genuinely love her at any point, but for the entirety of the series (except for the very very end) he thinks he could only ever be a danger to any other girl and it would be better to stay away from anyone else for their safety, no matter what. thanks to his curse, tella becomes his obsession.

after tella makes it clear she wants nothing to do with him (which she has every right to do), he believes he will never have another chance at love and is ready to go to unreasonable lengths - going back in time - to get one. i think that once he grows to care about evangeline, he still isn’t particularly nice to her and wants to only care about her as a key because he thinks that if he actually let her close, he would just be a danger to her, and he thinks she’s better off not knowing him, and he thinks he’s better off trying again with the one girl who didn’t die.

you make a good point of jacks being willing to go back in time for tella no matter the consequences! i think the difference is that he’d be originally going back in time for the idea of love instead of tella herself, to get something he wants instead of for her happiness, but he’s grown to value evangeline over all of his previous plans and something he desperately wants. this is why people (including me) talk about it! him having grown to really care for evangeline and put her first is highlighted a lot in ACFTL (though he doesn’t always go about it in the best way there, still making some stupid decisions, but that’s another conversation for another day haha).

sorry the post ended up so long! this is just my thoughts on the topic and some thoughts on why the fandom talks about him as we do - his thought process doesn’t necessarily justify how he acts sometimes, but this way it makes more sense to me, making the story about him growing to genuinely care for someone else and realizing the difference between obsession and love.

thank you again for your thoughts, i hope you have a good day! 💗