#i thought Dark Shadows was a tv show and a few movies and frankly i am tired

[therulerofallpotatos]

I forgot I had Tubi when I was making my To Watch excel sheet so I had to go through their entire catalogue, put everything I wanted on my list, then add that to the excel sheet and guys. Guys. Im begging

We need to chill with some of these franchises. There's too much tv. I will never finish this list.

[gffa]

I’M GONNA HAVE TO BREAK THIS UP BECAUSE IT’S KIND OF A LOT.  So, @alabasterswriting and I were having a fantastic conversation about Anakin and how much he intellectually-versus-emotionally knows that he can leave the Jedi Order at any time, that he’s not a slave to them and it was already getting really long, so I’m going to put this in a new post because this is going to be even longer, but IT’S A SUBJECT NEAR AND DEAR TO MY HEART BECAUSE I HAVE MANY FEELINGS ABOUT ANAKIN SKYWALKER. For context, there are some other posts that’ll be referenced so this is only, like, the length of two monster posts instead of five.  ^_~ - The original ask about whether or not Anakin was a slave to the Jedi, which sets up how the Jedi make it extremely clear that it’s fine to leave - A follow-up ask from alabasterswriting + their very thoughtful, love response, which this post is largely a response to! Now that I’ve gotten some sleep, I think I can be more coherent on why I think there’s a lot of really good stuff to explore with Anakin’s emotional misunderstanding (versus intellectually knowing that he can leave) and why I do think it’s an important element, but not necessarily at the core of why Anakin stayed. Why does Anakin stay as a Jedi?  I think the Obi-Wan & Anakin comic covers this really well--he plans to leave, he’s not upset about it, he’s excited and has nothing but respect for the Jedi Order, he even says that he may come back.  Anakin knows that he has options, he believes that he’s capable of taking off into the wider galaxy, he acknowledges that part of the reason he may have joined was, despite Qui-Gon’s warnings, all he saw was a magic man and a way out of slavery, what was he going to do, say no? The overarching plot of the comic is:  Obi-Wan wants him to be absolutely sure of this, so he asks Anakin for one last mission together, but makes it clear that he’ll accept whatever choice Anakin makes in the end.  Obi-Wan’s point is, when they call for reinforcements at the end to deal with Carnelion IV’s civil war, they get those reinforcements, becasue they did this as Jedi.  That the Jedi are part of the Republic and thus they have the backing of the Republic.  (This is, interestingly enough, also a major theme in Master & Apprentice, that the day is saved precisely because Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon were part of the Republic and had the backing of the Republic.)  Anakin realizes that he can accomplish more as a Jedi than he can setting off on his own, so he happily agrees to stay. This fits with how Anakin genuinely seems to like being a Jedi.  The problems he expresses with it, is that he wants more than what they can do, he wants to be able to tell people want to do, to make them do the right thing.  He expresses this to Padme in Attack of the Clones, he follows it up with that conversation with Tarkin during The Citadel arc, where they both feel the Jedi Code does not allow Jedi to go “far enough” to win the war. Further, he teaches on the beliefs of the Jedi.  After the brain invader worms, Anakin teaches Ahsoka about how to balance letting go of their attachments versus caring about other people and wanting to save them, how the two work together.  While she’s on Onderon and having confusing feelings for Lux, he teaches her again about how duty must come before her feelings, he seems to agree with this, because he’s not shy about subverting the Jedi teachings when he wants to.  And very clearly, he teaches the same things to Rex in the Bad Batch arc:

That’s exactly what the Jedi teach (and is ironic because this is just a few months before Revenge of the Sith and I think it’s actually a really perfect illustration of exactly what was at the heart of Anakin, that he genuinely believes in the Jedi teachings, until they apply to him and his fears eat him up and he makes himself the exception) and Anakin also seems to genuinely believe it. In Revenge of the Sith, Anakin doesn’t express any desire to not be a Jedi until after he’s helped kill Mace and the younglings and then, frankly, he’s repeating Palpatine’s words, not his own, he doesn’t really believe what he’s saying, imo.  When he talks to Padme about feeling lost, it isn’t expressed in terms of him feeling trapped, but instead that he feels he isn’t the Jedi he should be, that he wants more. Anakin never seems to feel trapped or obligated--there’s almost nothing in the movies or TV show that actually lean towards the idea that Anakin felt any pressure of being the Chosen One.  He doesn’t seem to believe it himself--he tells the Father that it’s a myth.  And the other Jedi (aside from Qui-Gon) never talk about it in front of him, it’s almost never even mentioned, I think it comes up all of two or three times in the movies?  And each time there are people expressing doubt about it being true and it’s never discussed at Anakin’s face.  Even in TCW, aside from the Mortis arc, it never really seems to come up pretty much at all. Does he feel an obligation to Shmi’s memory to stay as a Jedi?  Possibly!  It would certainly be an easy conclusion to come to!  He never expresses it directly anywhere that I can recall, though. At the end of The Wrong Jedi, when Ahsoka says she’s going to leave, he says,  “I understand. More than you realize, I understand wanting to walk away from the Order.“ which is the most he ever expresses about actually wanting to leave in any canon that I’ve seen.  We’re given no other context for this--is it because he’s angry at the Jedi, is it that he feels they’re not doing enough and he could do more as a free agent, is it that he wants to leave to be with Padme, is it that he doesn’t like being a Jedi, is it that he feels a wanderlust for the stars?  We’re given no further context in that scene, so we have to put it together with the other things we have.  That Anakin, when he was younger, said he felt a calling to the starts, that in ROTS he wants more, that in the conversations with Padme and Tarkin, he feels the Jedi aren’t going far enough and someone should make people do things. Put together with the end of the Obi-Wan & Anakin comic, where he stays because he feels he can do more with the Jedi than without them, I think that’s at the heart of why Anakin stays.  He wants more more more more.  This is further evidenced by what George Lucas says about how the dark side works, which is something I think Anakin is clearly sliding into at this point: “What happens when you go to the dark side is it goes out of balance and you get really selfish and you forget about everybody … because when you get selfish you get stuff, or you want stuff, and when you want stuff and you get stuff then you are afraid somebody is going to take it away from you, whether it’s a person or a thing or a particular pleasure or experience.”  --George Lucas That’s what I see it as, because the story of Anakin Skywalker is one that is sliding towards the dark side, and Anakin’s problem is that he wants more and more and more.  He wants to be a Jedi, he wants to be married to Padme, he wants to be able to murder people to win the war, he wants to be made a Master (despite having just taken a bribe from Palpatine and clearly isn’t ready for it yet in emotional mastery), he wants all these people, things, and experiences.  He wants more. The point @alabasterswriting​ makes here:  “To me, (and it’s totally an opinion, and I’m open to disagreement), it’s always seemed like Anakin was on his way to being able to being able to handle himself emotionally before his perceptions of his sense of self were messed with. And I think (as I’m sure many do) a large part of that was Palpatine feeding his ego/preying on his fears and insecurities. Like we see in the bar with Palpatine that he uses a whole bunch of trigger words meant to make Anakin equate the Jedi to his time as a slave.“ is a really good one, because I absolutely agree that Palpatine completely muddied the waters on this, that Anakin was on his way to a much healthier understanding of himself and ability to understand himself, but then Palpatine started dripping poison into his hear and telling Anakin the things he wanted to hear, rather than the truth that he needed to hear. So, eventually, Vader rationalizes what he’s doing by looping back around to what Palpatine told him, which George Lucas makes clear in his directions to Hayden Christensen (that he’s rationalizing and justifying the things he’s doing, that he doesn’t actually believe them, that is), that that’s at the heart of how Anakin handles things. He does feel powerless to help people--despite that he’s not and there are plenty of moments where he knows otherwise, like in the Age of Republic comic, when he helps the people of Kudo out of the sticky situation they’re in, they have a chance to make their own choice about whether they want to join the Separatists or the Republic, Obi-Wan specifically points out that it was him who helped them:

There are actually a ton of instances in The Clone Wars of this as well, like he helps the rebels on Onderon, he helps save Naboo from the Blue Shadow Virus, he helps free the people of Mon Calamari, he helps free the people of Kiros, etc., but it was easier to grab the above cap as an example (even if I do absolutely agree that Anakin Skywalker is a bucket with a whole in the bottom--it doesn’t matter that he helps people almost every day, it’s never enough, he still wants more, he still feels powerless to help as many people as he wants, and he does feel like he’s often taking things apart, rather than fixing things, as he tells Padme in the Malevolence arc) as well as it’s a good segue into his relationship with Obi-Wan in the next part. Ultimately, I think it comes back to the dark side--it lies, it twists things, it tells Anakin that he wants more and more and more, that nothing else around him is ever enough.  He’s not helping enough people, he’s not doing enough stuff, he’s not getting enough recognition, he’s not getting enough personal loyalty over loyalty to things that are bigger than him. But he can’t face that truth about himself, that the dark side has twisted him, so instead the dark side must be right, Palpatine must be right.  The dark side always wins, Obi-Wan, Vader says in the Star Wars comic, and so everything else must be shuffled around to fit that.  Everything else must be rationalized to fit the way he feels, so he leans into whatever justification he can find, despite that he actually really wanted to be a Jedi and believed in their teachings. (Part 2 in a reblog coming soon because I can only do one monster post at a time.  ^_~)

[strangeandforlornbooks]

best books with morally ambiguous narrators!

all y’all’s problematic faves and villains! :) also included are third person narrators but in books with morally ambiguous leads/themes 

Sci-fi

Scythe by Neal Shusterman: in a future free from pain, disease, and war, people can live forever. ‘scythes’ are given the power to decide who lives and who dies to preserve the balance. sad and kinda gives of hunger games vibes, if you like that.

Neuromancer by William Gibson: basically invented the cyberpunk genre. strange and removed protagonists. (a team of computer hackers have to face off against an evil AI). you kind of dislike everyone and suddenly you’re crying over them. one of those trippy sci-fi classics.

The Sirens of Titan by Kurt Vonnegut: very beautiful and very very sad (same author as slaughterhouse five). the richest man in america has to face a martian invasion. more about free will and bad people doing good things than a plot that makes any kind of sense.

The Man in the High Castle by Philip K Dick: set in an alternate universe where the germans and japanese won world war two. not really like the tv show at all- it’s not an action story, and there’s not really the hope to somehow fix the world that drives a lot of dystopia stories. instead its about how people survive and connect to one another in a hopeless society.

The Scorpion Rules by Erin Bow: a supercomputer convinces the leaders of the world to keep the peace for hundreds of years by taking their children hostage and obliterating any city that disobeys. what happens to the hostage protagonists when war seems inevitable? lots of morally fraught decisions and characters slowly losing their identity. (plus a fun lesbian romance)

Cryptonomicon by Neal Stephenson: a brilliant mathematician and a dedicated marine fight to keep the ultra secret in world war two. fifty years later,  a tech company discovers what remains of their story. one of the most memorable sequences in the book is a japanese soldier slowly becoming disillusioned with his nation and horrified by the war even as he continues to fight.

Blade Runner by Philip K. Dick: another one of those sci-fi classics that’s not at all like the movie. there is a bounty hunter for robots, though, as well as a weird religion that probably is referencing catholicism and a decaying society with a shortage of pets. kind of a trip.

Wilder Girls by Rory Power: girls trapped in a boarding school on an isolated island must face a creeping rot that affects the animals and plants on the island as well as their own bodies. the protagonists will do anything to survive and keep each other safe. very tense (and bonus lesbian romance whoo)

The Fifth Season by N K Jemisin: three women are gifted with the ability to control the earth’s energy in a world where those who can do so are forced into hiding or slavery. some veryyyy dark choices here but lots of strong female characters.

Historical Fiction

Fingersmith by Sarah Waters: two victorian lesbians fall in love as they plot to betray each other in horrific ways. lots of plot twists, plucky thieves, gothic settings, and a great romance.

Quo Vadis by Henryk Sienkiwicz: a powerful roman soldier in the time of Nero plots to kidnap a young woman after he falls in love with her, only to learn more about the mysterious christian religion she follows. very melodramatic but some terrific prose. 

All the Light We Cannot See by Anthony Doerr: a blind girl in France and a brilliant German boy recruited by the military struggle through the chaos of the second world war. ends with a bang (iykyk.) very sad, reads like poetry.

Boxers by Gene Luen Yang: graphic novel reveals the story of a young boy fighting in the boxer rebellion in early twentieth century china. the sequel, saints, is also excellent. beautifully and sympathetically shows the protagonist’s descent into evil- the reader really understands each step along the way.

Fantasy

Three Dark Crowns by Kendare Blake: three triplets separated at birth, each with their own magical powers, have to fight to the death to gain the throne. lots of fun honestly

Six of Crows and Crooked Kingdom by Leigh Bardugo: everyone in these books is highly problematic but you love them all anyway. a ragtag game of criminals plan a heist on a magical fortress. some terrific tragic back stories, repressed feelings, and revenge schemes.

The Dark Tower series by Stephen King: idk how to describe these frankly but if you can put up with King’s appalling writing of female characters they’re pretty interesting. fantasy epic about saving the world/universe, sort of. cowboys and prophecies and overlapping dimensions and drug addicts galore.

The Amulet of Samarkand by Jonathan Stroud: lots of fun! a twelve year old decides to summon a demon for his cute lil revenge scheme. sarcastic demon narrator. lighthearted until s*** gets real suddenly.

Elegy and Swansong by Vale Aida: fantasy epic with machiavellian lesbians and enemies to lovers to enemies to ??? to lovers. charming and exciting and lovely characters.

The False Prince by Jennifer Nielsen: an orphan boy must compete with a few others for the chance to impersonate a dead prince. really dark but very tense and exciting and good twists.

The Grace of Kings by Ken Liu: fantasy epic. heroes overthrow an evil empire and then struggle as the revolution dissolves into warring factions. interesting world building and three dimensional characters, even if they only have a small part.

Circe by Madeline Miller: the story behind the witch who turns men into pigs in the odyssey. madeline miller really said, i just used my classics degree to write a beautiful gay love story and now im going to write a powerful feminist retelling because i can. queen. an amazing and satisfying book that kills me a lil bit because of the two lines referencing the song of achilles.

Heartless by Marissa Meyer: the tragic backstory for the queen of hearts in alice in wonderland. a little predictable but very fun with a compelling protagonist

A Song of Ice and Fire (Game of Thrones) by George RR Martin: ok I know we all hate GRRM and rightfully so but admittedly these books do have some great characters and great scenes. they deserve better than GRRM though. also he will probably never finish the books anyway....

A Series of Unfortunate Events by Lemony Snicket: not really fantasy but not really anything else either. plucky, intelligent, and kind children fight off evil plots for thirteen books until suddenly you realize the world is not nearly as black and white as you thought. 

Classics

Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier: gothic romance!! a new wife is curious about the mysterious death of her predecessor in a creepy old house in the British countryside...good twists and lovely prose.

A Separate Peace by John Knowles: not really morally ambiguous but one awful decision suddenly has awful consequences and certain people are haunted by guilt forever.... really really really beautiful and really really really sad. boys in a boarding school grow up together under the shadow of world war two.

Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy: while imperial russia slowly decays a beautiful young woman begins a destructive affair. a long book. very russian. the ending is incredibly tense and well written.

Lord of the Flies by William Golding: I think you know the plot to this one. the prose is better than you remember and the last scene is always exciting.

And Then There Were None by Agatha Christie: one by one, the guests on an island are slowly picked off. one of Christie’s darkest mysteries- no happy ending here! very tense and great twists.

Contemporary

The Secret History by Donna Tartt: inspired the whole dark academia aesthetic. college students get a little too into ancient greece and it does not end very well. lovely prose but I found the characters unlikable.

Honorable Mentions

The Dublin Saga by Edward Rutherford: has literally a billion protagonists, but some of them are morally ambiguous ig? follows a few families stories’ from the 400s ad to irish independence in the 20s. beautifully captures the weight and movement of irish history.

Artemis Fowl by Eoin Colfer: how morally ambiguous can you be if you’re, like, eleven? a lot if you’re a criminal genius who wants to kidnap a fairy for your evil-ish plan apparently!

Redemption by Leon Uris: literally my favorite novel ever. the sequel to Trinity but can stand alone. various irish families struggle through the horrors of world war one. the hero isn’t really morally ambiguous, but the main theme of the novel is extremely bad people suddenly questioning their choices and eventually redeeming themselves. sweeping themes of love, screwed up families, redemption, and patriotism.

The Lymond Chronicles and House of Niccolo by Dorothy Dunnett: heroes redeem themselves/try to get rich/try to save their country in early renaissance Europe. if I actually knew what happened in these books I'm sure it would be morally ambiguous but its too confusing for me. in each book you spend at least a third convinced the protagonist is evil, though. lots of exciting sword fights, tragic romances, plot twists, and kicking english butt.

Bonus: Protagonist is less morally ambiguous and more very screwed up and sad all the time

The Goldfinch by Donna Tartt: you know this one bc its quoted in all those quote compilations. basically the story of how one horrible event traumatizes a young man and how he develops a connection to a painting. really really really good.

Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro: hard to describe but strange... not an action novel or a dystopia really but sort of along those lines. very hopeless.

[askthedespairkids]

Chapter 1: Your First Lesson in Despair ~Post-Trial~

//And the end to the actual plot of chapter 1! Probably will do FTE after this or maybe I’ll do all of them as a big post at the very end of the story. We’ll see!

//Hope ya’ll enjoy this!

-Chapter 1, Post Trial-

 “Congratulations! Just as you all suspected, the one who trapped and killed Maemi Watanabe was none other than Saori Kibe, the Ultimate Paranormal Investigator!” Monokuma clapped. He says ‘congratulations’, but this doesn’t feel like a victory. Not at all.

 “Kibe…” Shinko-san spoke through gritted teeth. “I want to know. I want to know why the fuck this all went down! Why the hell did you kill Watanabe?! Was your past that fuckin’ bad?!”

 “Th-that’s not it…” Kibe-san tried.

 “Then what?! What the fuck could’ve possibly happened to-“

 “Shinko-sama. Enough. Allow Kibe-sama to speak freely, or this will go nowhere.” Ishikawa-san cut in. Shinko-san grunted and turned away from Kibe-san. She took a breath and looked up at us.

 “I…I had to get out of here. When Monokuma, I knew what my note had to be…my older sister and I had a fight before I entered Hope’s Peak. She said some things, I said some things…and she said she never wanted to see me again…th-the idea that I’m stuck in here and might never get to reconcile with her…” Kibe-san’s eyes seemed to light us as she thought of her sister. “She was really smart, I couldn’t help but admire her. Even if she’d hate me, I can’t help but love my sister…”

 “What a stupid reason.” Shinko-san spat.

 “Shut up, will you?! My god, do you not think before you speak?! I’m so fuckin’ sorry that you have nobody to care about in the outside world, but not everyone else is like you!” Kurohiko-san snapped, surprising everyone. “K…Kibe-san cares about her family above all else, and that’s not something that she should be hated for. The whole point of motives is that if we knew about those notes, we would’ve killed for it. So…it’s not Kibe-san’s fault that she figured out the note before seeing it.”

 “K-Kurohiko-kun…” Kibe-san’s bottom lip trembled. “E-even if you say that, I killed Watanabe-san! I killed someone who was going to work so hard to keep everyone alive and I targeted her because of it! It’s my fault…! Watanabe-san…I’m sorry! I’m s-sorry…!”

 “Watanabe-sama was a very forgiving person…I’m sure that she would forgive your actions from beyond the eternal slumber. Memento Mori…” Ishikawa-san whispered the last part of her statement. I looked at Kibe-san, knowing what she must be going through. The idea of never seeing a family member again, I don’t think I could handle it either…

 “I…I don’t expect anyone here to forgive me. I was ready to sacrifice you all so I could leave…I’m an awful person!”

 “…it’s okay, Kibe-san. I don’t blame you.” We all looked at Ram-san. “Ah, um…! Th-that is to say…we were putting in this kind of situation, so our minds wouldn’t think of many options…” Even though she got suspected because of Kibe-san…Ram-san, you’re a really nice person, aren’t you? But who are you really…?

 “Ram-san…thank you.” Kibe-san smiled weakly.

 “Alright, if we’re done with all that, then it’s time to move onto the main event!” Monokuma jumped up to interrupt us. M…main event…? “It’s time to move onto the punishment!”

 “P-punishment…th-the execution?!” Kibe-san fell to her knees. “W-wait, no, don’t I get a chance to plead a case or something?!”

 “Let’s get this moving, I’ve prepared a very special punishment for the Ultimate Paranormal Investigator, Saori Kibe!” H-he wasn’t even listening to her!

 “You can’t do this, you have to let me outta here now! Someone get me out of here!” Kibe-san began pounding on the walls. I can’t turn away, but I don’t want to watch.

 “Let’s give it everything we’ve got! Iiiiiiit’s PUNISHMENT TIME!!”

 “RETSUKOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!”

 -GAME OVER- -SAORI KIBE HAS BEEN FOUND GUILTY!- -COMMENCING EXECUTION!-

 We all watched with horror a metal chain latched around Kibe-san’s neck and dragged her off to a room behind Monokuma’s throne as a massive TV screen lowered into the room and flashed on. The screen showed Kibe-san in the middle a child’s bedroom, the camera looking like any old camera used for home videos.

 -Saori Kibe’s Execution: What’s in the Shadows?-

 Kibe-san turned on a flashlight and shined it around the room trying to find an exit. In the corner of the room a rocking chair began to move on its own causing Kibe-san to jump and hit her back against the wall. When she touched it, a panel moved away from the wall and a blade stabbed her through the arm she wasn’t holding the flashlight with.

 She stumbled, knocking into the cot and onto the toys scattered on the floor. She yelped again and rolled off them and shined the flashlight again, seeing an exit in front of her. The door swung open and something behind Kibe-san appeared, grabbing her by the ankle and dragging her through the doorway. The camera switched to a staircase and we watched as Kibe-san was thrown down the staircase, hitting her head several times.

 She managed to get up at the bottom though was visibly bleeding from a wound on her head. Then the shadow appeared again behind her. The figured grabbed Kibe-san by the head but before we could all see what happened, the camera footage glitched out for a few moments.

 It came back and the sight left in front of us was Kibe-san sitting on a couch with her neck clearly broken and a spear stabbed through her torso.

 --

 We were in shock. Even Sly-san had been caught off guard by the brutality of the execution. Ram-san had fallen to her knees and was sobbing into her hands, unable to even look up at the TV screen that the rest of us, try as we might, couldn’t tear our gazes away from.

 “Wowee! That was pretty suspenseful, don’t’cha think?! Like that one horror movie! What’s it called? Paranormal Ac-“

 “Wh-what the hell was that…?” Okanaya-san said weakly. “She was gonna die so why make a twisted show of it…?”

 “Huh? She killed someone in such a fancy way, so why shouldn’t she get the same treatment? Get a grip, idiots! I just paid her back for what she did to your precious leader!” Monokuma stuck a paw in the air.

 “Ah…Monokuma’s right. Kibe simply got what she deserved.” Kurosaki-san shrugged. “Such a waste of space, thinking she could get away with killing Mademoiselle Watanabe like that. Frankly, you should’ve prolonged her head. Snapping her neck was far too kind.”

 “Oh, you think so? Got any notes for me next time?” Monokuma produced a notepad.

 “K-Kurosaki-san?! What are you saying?! How can you be okay with what you just saw?!” I couldn’t believe Kurosaki-san would say that. No matter how you look at it, Kibe-san didn’t deserve to die. Especially not like that. Kurosaki-san simply looked at me before his face darkened with a smirk. A smirk I’d never expect to see on someone. It was so full of malice that it made me wince.

 “Huh? Nagata-kyun, I would prefer if you kept that kind of question to yourself! After all…I’ll never forgive Kibe for killing her. Never ever.” Kurosaki-san tipped his hat down. “Mademoiselle Watanabe…she went through so much, and yet…”

 “What was that about Watanabe-san?” Kurohiko-san asked.

 “Nothing. Never mind that. The trial is over, so how about we all go get some rest, m’kay?” Kurosaki-san smiled as gently as he would normally, but I can’t get that image of a few seconds ago out of my head. Kurosaki-san…just what kind of person are you?

 -Chapter 1, Post Trial Ryuu-

 I sat in my room staring blankly at the ceiling, I was trying my best to fall asleep, but…the things I saw today. Watanabe-san’s murder. Kibe-san’s execution. Kurosaki-san’s inner darkness. I’d probably just have a nightmare if I tried to sleep.

 The bell at my door rang. “C-coming!” Though I was hesitant, I went and answered it. And when I opened the door, standing there scratching his neck awkwardly was Okanaya-san.

 “H-hey, um…it’s Nagaru, right…?”

 “Nagata.” I corrected.

 “R-right! Nagata…sorry, um…I’m not really good at this stuff, but…you helped me during the trial today, so I wanted to thank you. You knew I went through that cafeteria, but you lied to save me. Did…you really think I was innocent that much?” If I was honest, a lot of it was down to Kurosaki-san…

 “I guess I just don’t see you as a killer.” I murmured. I was still nervous to talk to him knowing what his temper is like. “You weren’t the killer, so I did what I needed to in order to get everyone else to believe me. I’m just glad that everything turned out as good as it could have…” No, if everything was as good as it could be, I wouldn’t be in a killing game with everyone.

 “Y-yeah…you really don’t see me as a killer?”

 “Should I?”

 “It’s just…” His voice trailed off. Was…Okanaya-san blushing? “…most people assume I’m a serious brute, but I’m not a bad person. I don’t think I am in any case. Sorry about hitting you before, by the way. If I didn’t cause a commotion, Kibe might not have been able to steal those keys for her plan.”

 “You shouldn’t blame yourself. And I’m fine, see?” I smiled. It was forced, but I didn’t want Okanaya-san feeling down. “We’re in such a strange situation, I can’t blame you for being tense. We’re all handling the situation in different ways and to different degrees…but, from now on, if you want people to see you in a better light then you should include yourself in the group. Come to the cafeteria tomorrow.”

 “Th-the cafeteria…” Okanaya-san looked nervous about that idea.

 “I’ll wait for you there, you can sit with me.” I don’t know what was causing me to be so nice to him. Hopefully he’ll come though.

 “Yeah…thanks, Nagata.” He smiled softly…

 …

Okanaya-san’s smile feels…comforting.

 -Chapter 1 Post Trial Yuuki-

 “A rendezvous with you, is this a date or do you plan on trying to kill me?” Yuuki asked.

 “Please don’t suggest either of those things ever again. I just need to talk to you, seeing as you’re the most suspicious one in the group.” Sly crossed his arms.

 “I don’t really like hearing that from the Ultimate Assassin. Couldn’t a killing game be one big convoluted method of killing a bunch of targets at once?” Yuuki smirked. “Of course, you’re not the one behind the killing game.”

 “You’re so sure of that?”

 “I am.”

 “Why?”

 “Are you the mastermind?” Yuuki stepped a little closer.

 “No, I’m not.” Sly took a step back, his expression becoming increasingly more irritated. “Who are you? You introduced yourself as the Ultimate Explorer, but my gut is telling me that was probably a lie.”

 “You think I’d lie to you all? I haven’t told any lies since I got here.” Yuuki lied.

 “Kurosaki let me make one thing clear. As long as you aren’t a threat, I won’t bother you. I won’t tolerate any behaviour like before though.”

 “No need to worry about that. Mademoiselle Watanabe was a special case to me. I won’t become so emotional next time.”

 “Why is that?”

 “Why the interest? You’re an assassin, and you barely know anyone here. Should you care so much about me and my motivations?”

 “I may be an assassin, but I’m still a human. I don’t care about these people, but they still don’t deserve to die in such fashions, that much is obvious to anyone.” Sly said. Yuuki stared at Sly for a while before putting a hand to his chin and nodding thoughtfully.

 “Just as I thought…you’re a special one, Herr Knives.” Yuuki stepped closer and trapped Sly by slamming his hand against the wall behind Sly and using his other hand to tilt Sly’s chin up towards Yuuki’s face. “Please…entertain me sometime.”

 “Gross.” Sly answered, unphased. He pushed Yuuki off him. “Try not to get yourself into any trouble.” And with that, Sly walked off. Yuuki watched as Sly left and smirked once more.

 “So many interesting people here. I wonder how things will proceed from here.”

 -Chapter 1, Your First Lesson in Despair END-

14 students remain

[muthaz-rapapa]

Precure Movie “Reincarnations”

With KiraPre’s coming out in a little under two months (second cue to start anticipating next season), I thought I’d go through all the ones I’ve watched so far to see how many seiyuus who starred in the movies ended up coming back to voice characters (main or supporting) in later seasons.

So there’s one rule to this: it has to go from movie –> tv anime. Hence the whole calling it a “reincarnations”…thing.

Left out the All Stars movies cuz I don’t want to deal with those.

Oh, and these are in order by the movies’ corresponding season.

Warning: Image heavy. Also, crappy editing because I’m too lazy to make it look nice. :P

1) Shadow (Yes! Precure 5 Kagami no Kuni no Miracle Daibouken) –> Syrup (Yes! Precure 5 GoGo!) {CV: Park Romi}

I’m pretty sure this is the strangest one on the list. But it’s the legendary Romi Park we’re talking about. She can voice anything.

So not so strange, I guess……no, it is. It’s quite bizarre just thinking these two even have one thing in common. xD;

2) Dark Dream (Yes! Precure 5 Kagami no Kuni no Miracle Daibouken) –> Aoki Reika/Cure Beauty (Smile Precure!) {CV: Nishimura Chinami}

By far, my most favorite “reincarnation”. I love Dark Dream so much as a villain and a baddy-turned-good. That she “returned” as the lovely and badass Cure Beauty… it just made me appreciate Cure Beauty even more.

And I always get so gleeful when their connection shows up in fanart, too. ^^

3) Dark Lemonade (Yes! Precure 5 Kagami no Kuni no Miracle Daibouken) –> Madoka Aguri/Cure Ace (Doki Doki! Precure) {CV: Kugimiya Rie}

Can’t say I’m surprised that Rie Kugimiya came back. Even less surprised that she’d be voicing a Cure because she is a famous veteran.

What I didn’t expect was getting two variations of her voice in one character. Which isn’t a bad thing. I like Cure Ace’s voice. More than Aguri’s/Dark Lemonade’s anyway.

4) Dark Mint (Yes! Precure 5 Kagami no Kuni no Miracle Daibouken) –> Flora (Yes! Precure 5 GoGo!) {CV: Minaguchi Yuko}

Not surprised here either.

I don’t have much to say about this one. Yuko Minaguchi was the voice behind Hotaru/Sailor Saturn from the first SM series, after all. So whether she’s playing an antagonist or a holy-goddess-like figure, she always makes it sound so natural. And her voice is so pretty. She’s so gifted. ^^

5) Princess Chocola (Yes! Pretty Cure 5 GoGo!: Okashi no Kuni no Happy Birthday!) –> Chypre (Heartcatch Precure!) {CV: Kawata Taeko}

I’m very fond of this one because I love both of them. <3

It actually took me a while to realize Chocola had the same voice as Chypre (cuz I watched Heartcatch before I watched Yes!5) and when I did I was like “Ohhhh……”

Anyways, it’s nice that a cute character came back as another cute character. Only a very few on this list kept that consistency.

6) Dry (Yes! PreCure 5 GoGo!: Okashi no Kuni no Happy Birthday!) –> Cologne (Heartcatch Precure!) {CV: Ishida Akira}

Let’s just go with the fact that none of these surprise me, lol.

I’m always going to be expecting the veteran seiyuus to show up sooner or later, movie-exclusive or not.

7) Toymajin (true form) (Fresh PreCure!: Omocha no Kuni wa Himitsu ga Ippai?!) –> Hanasaki Kaoruko/Cure Flower (Heartcatch Precure!) {CV: Sakamoto Chika}

I don’t even remember if teddy!Toymajin ever talked at all but according to MAL, he did.

*shrug*

To be honest, what really surprised me (lol, yea, I spoke too soon \D;) was running into Chika Sakamoto again. I remember her fondly as the memorable voice for Nuriko from Fushigi Yuugi. To the mahou shoujo community, you’ll probably recognize her as the voice for Yaten Kou/Sailor Star Healer from Sailor Moon Stars.

8) Olivier (Heartcatch Precure!:  Hana no Miyako de Fashion Show…Desu ka?!) –> Candy (Smile Precure!) {CV: Otani Ikue}

P-I-K-A-C-H-UUUU~!!!

8D

Ok, but seriously, I really loved Olivier so when I think of this, I can’t help but feel there’s been a bit of a downgrade. There’s nothing wrong with Candy. It’s just that I think of her more strongly as a mascot than as a character, that’s all.

9) Howling (Suite Precure♪: Torimodose! Kokoro ga Tsunagu Kiseki no Melody!) –> Emperor Pierrot (Smile Precure!) {CV: Genda Tesshou}

Apparently.

Almost all of Precure’s Big Bad Bosses sound the same to me. I really can’t tell the difference.

10) Flat (Suite Precure♪: Torimodose! Kokoro ga Tsunagu Kiseki no Melody!) –> Close (Go! Princess Precure) {CV: Madono Mitsuaki}

Second case where the villain comes back as another villain.

Close is hard to forget (because he’s so annoying) but Flat barely had any character to him that if I didn’t look him up, I wouldn’t be able to tell who’s who in the Trio de Major.

11) Dog (Smile Precure!: Ehon no Naka wa Minna no Chiguhagu!) –> Puff (Go! Princess Precure) {CV: Toyama Nao}

This shouldn’t even be on the list but it’s so amusing that I just had to. Does it literally, right next to Nao Toyama’s name, say “Dog” in the movie credits? xD;

Well, unlike the others who do sport noticeable differences between them, there’s hardly any for these two. That one just got upgraded to a cute maid three years later.

12) Momotaro (Smile Precure!: Ehon no Naka wa Minna no Chiguhagu!) –> Aihara Yuuki (Go! Princess Precure) {CV: Abe Atsushi}

Alright, this can actually be a real reincarnation. I mean, they look alike! They even seem to have similar temperaments!

…Or is that just me?

13) Purple Buggy (Doki Doki! Precure: Mana Kekkon?!! Mirai ni Tsunagu Kibou no Dress) –> Glaive (Kira Kira Precure a la Mode) {CV: Egawa Hisao}

Hey hey~! Somebody from the current season!

But the more important question…when is Glaive going to be relevant in KiraPre again? ^^;

14) Orihara Tsumugi (Happiness Charge Precure!: Ningyou no Kuni no Ballerina) –> Izayoi Riko/Cure Magical (Mahou Tsukai Precure!) {CV: Horie Yui}

Easily my second most favorite of this bunch and frankly, there’s no need to go into extensive explanation about it. HaCha’s movie wouldn’t have been half as interesting without Tsumugi.

Then, bless our luck, we get to hear Hocchan again! Not only as an MC but also as an adorable tsundere! Riko~!!! X3

Man, I really love it when they come back as a Cure. The tones are obviously going to be different between a role they voiced in the movie and a role they voice in the tv series but it’s fun observing just how different they are, y’know? The key is really the acting, yup. ^^

15) Princess Pumplulu (Go! Princess Precure: Go! Go!! Gouka Sanbon Date!!!) –> ??? {CV: Hanazawa Kana}

I can say with confidence that a good percentage of us is waiting on bated breath for the day when Kana-chan will finally be assigned a Precure title. And it’s going to happen, I tell you. IT MUST.

I don’t care if they make her one of the first regular Cures or a latecomer Cure as long as she is a one of the main Cures. Because wtf, Go!Pri’s movie was one the most unfavorite things I’ve ever came across in this franchise that I need to be compensated for sitting through it! If they didn’t split it into three parts, I think we could’ve gotten a hell of a better story.

Especially on Pumplulu’s part. She had such a nice personality and her character had so much potential for expansion. Like, oh I dunno, turning her into a movie-exclusive Cure maybe?! Because technically, a lot of that movie should’ve been about her. AND she had all the qualifications to become Precure. She’s kind and beautiful and strong enough to resist the bad guy from brainwashing her (which is why he had to lock her up because he couldn’t use her like he did with her parents)!

Why wasn’t she made a Cure?! Why’d we have to focus on Haruka dancing around making pudding and CGI stuff I don’t care about?!

*rants for the next few hours*

Not to mention, @rona67th‘s gorgeous fanart of her in Cure form and Mode Elegant just makes me want it to be official even more! *sobs* I’d die to see that animated. I’d give up all the others’ Mode Elegant Halloween forms just for Pumplulu to be made a real Cure. T_T

(Btw, check out @rona67th’s Cure Zephyr, too! Her design is really awesome! ^^)

*SIGH*

Well, there’s still that hope that HanaKana will be cast in one of the seasons after KiraPre is finished. I’m actually glad she wasn’t put in KiraPre. I need a season with a deeper concept and theme and overall, stronger story for any role she plays. Because it’s HanaKana and I love her so obviously I would want her to get the roles with the better everything. <3

And that’s it, I suppose. Anyone I missed, feel free to add. Though I’m pretty sure I covered all the major ones.

Guess I’ll do this again when the 2nd Precure Generation is over.

[atarimcgregor]

Thoughts on The Last Jedi

I‘ve written something like this about the last two Star Wars movies, and The Last Jedi is just about the most talked about, controversial one yet, so, of course I‘m going to have some thoughts on it. (And there are spoilers).

The good

While I didn‘t completely hate the „remake-ness“ of TFA, I‘m very happy that it didn‘t continue with this one. The Last Jedi has a lot of elements based on ESB and RotJ but it‘s more like echoes than repetition – there are always twists to it. I think The Last Jedi actually even strengthens TFA through this. It’s a natural evolution of the series’ themes. TFA was all about the new standing in the shadow of the (glorious) old – and the repetition and nostalgia worked in service of that. And The Last Jedi is all about rising out of that shadow – and the twists on the familiar there are similarly in service of that. It‘s very meta. And pretty smart. Thematically speaking, The Last Jedi is probably the strongest movie of the franchise – though it isn‘t flawless in that regard (it has some mixed messages).

Some characters were notably improved. With introductions out of the way, they were able to dive deeper into some of them. Luke was a standout. Mark Hamill finally got to really prove himself as an actor. Leia was a badass… even though that space scene could have been done better. Poe was improved and got nice flaws and character growth. With Rey, I actually did kind of buy that Mary Sue argument in TFA but thought she was much better in this one. She didn‘t really have any real flaws in TFA but The Last Jedi revealed a depth to her that I now see in retrospect was already there in TFA. And I love her origin. I completely disagree with anyone who’s upset about it. It makes her character better and it makes the universe better.

I loved the use of color. That salt planet was probably the most beautiful location in the series’ history.

I didn’t mind the humor. I actually thought it worked better than it did in TFA.

The bad

The Finn story was definitely the weakest one. I don‘t agree that it was pointless, though. It had character development and fit in with the themes. But it definitely dragged. Had some corny parts as well.

The Yoda part had me thinking: „Am I watching fan-fiction right now?“

What I probably disliked the most was Snoke. I thought Snoke was a bad character in TFA because he was too much like the Emperor, but I was very open to the idea that they’d redeem him through something interesting they had planned for the next movies. But now it’s obvious that he was never anything more than a plot device. They just needed an “Emperor 2” to throw out the window. And I think it’s frankly inexcusable that they didn’t give any explanation for him. I’ve seen a lot of people justifying it with “Hey, we didn’t know anything about the Emperor either” and that’s… bullshit. Star Wars was largely a blank slate then. Since then, the world’s been pretty well fleshed out. We now know there were a thousand years of peace before the movies and that the Sith (which we can assume are the only skilled dark side users) were only ever two at a time. The Sith got wiped out and then this ancient, powerful, evil force user shows up and it’s not clear who he is, where he comes from or why he’s showing up now. And then, poof, he’s gone forever. It seems completely obvious to me that this character demands an explanation. This is a gigantic, unignorable plot hole, as far as I’m concerned.

Continuing from Snoke: The same basically goes for the First Order. It’s very unbelievable, even by Star Wars standards, that this terrorist cell would have the resources they do. I let it go in the last one because I was hoping there’d be some explanation for it in the sequels, but no. The government has at least thousands of planets worth of tax money and are still easily crushed by them. This does actually take me somewhat out of these movies. A few lines of explanation would have done wonders.

Perhaps the most important negative aspect I can think of, though, which I’m seriously grappling with right now, is that I’m not sure this movie should exist. The Last Jedi is such a viciously iconoclastic movie. A kick in the gut of the fans of the original ones. It’s the most downer epilogue possible for what is probably the most beloved film franchise of all time. Why do it? I know it works thematically, but I’m still not sure those artistic reasons are sufficient enough. Why does the past actually need to be killed? If it was so important to raise the new Star Wars out of the shadow of the originals, another way to do it would have been to just tell a completely unrelated story. Have it take place 100 years after RotJ, for example. But, of course, people want to see the original characters returning. And if that’s the decision they went with, can they allow themselves to treat them this way? A lot of this seems needlessly cruel. I’m very unsure whether the existence of these new movies is - as overly dramatic as it sounds - morally defensible.

Other thoughts

I somehow managed to completely avoid anything about the movie until the screening. I mean I literally didn’t see a single trailer or TV spot, promotional pictures or anything. I saw like five stills online which told me nothing. It was hard work and I doubt I’ll be able to repeat it for the next one. In the days before seeing the movie I tried to think of what I could reasonably expect to happen in it based on what I knew and all I got was “Rey and Luke will be on that island for probably at least the first third and she’ll probably get trained by him.”

I‘m sort of a prequel apologist and genuinely like the expansion of the universe the prequels brought with them. When watching the sequels, knowing the filmmakers are likely only basing them on the original trilogy, I‘m always looking to see if there’s also something there from the prequels. So far it’s been very, very little. In The Last Jedi, it’s mostly tiny things, such as Luke referring to the Emperor as „Darth Sidious.“ The biggest thing that might be inspired by the prequels is the idea of the Jedi being worthless failures. That seems like a logical continuation of ideas introduced in the prequels.

A horrifying thought that went through my mind while watching the movie was: “Oh, my god. Is… is Reylo canon?” I’ve been pretty vocal with my dislike of that ship, but now I almost feel like apologizing. I didn’t think in a million years there was anything actually to it.

Elaborating on my Reylo hate: I feel like a lot of people, both in real life and the characters in the movies, fail to recognize just how bad Kylo Ren is. He’s basically a genocidal mass murderer. He’s responsible for at least millions of deaths, possibly billions. He might be worse than any people in our actual history. I think it’s actually kind of hilarious that the characters in the movies are always trying to “save him” or believe he can be “redeemed.” If there was any logic to it, then even if he went over to the good side, he’d rightfully be tried in the Star Wars equivalent of the Hague court for crimes against humanity (for lack of a better word) and given just about the maximum sentence.

A lot of people have been complaining about the force being too powerful in this one, and not in line with what we’ve seen before. That’s probably correct, but it didn’t bother me at all for a specific reason. I’m likely completely wrong about it, because no one else seems to have understood it that way, but while watching it I thought the island was a force enhancing location. I figured the Jedi chose it for their temple because it… amplified things. And that was also the reason that dark hole was there. I thought Luke had Rey sit on that rock because it was a particularly force sensitive spot. It’s at least a nice way to ignore a plot hole.

Any fan theories about the kid at the end are dumb. It‘s just a thematic thing.

On that note: I‘m pretty sure J.J. Abrams and Rian Johnson have very different ideas about storytelling which probably don‘t mesh all that well together. Abrams seems to be all about the big questions and mysteries. Johnson seems much more focused on the actual closed work and the emotion within it. That seems to have created some plot discrepancy which will hopefully somehow come together in a satisfying way in Episode IX.

Characters I’d like to see show up in the next one: 1) Lando. But I don’t see it happening. Why would he wait so long to join the Resistence? He could probably only logically have appeared in the first two movies. Though I completely understand why that didn’t happen, it would have been too many characters demanding attention. 2) Phasma. Just because of how ridiculous it would be. 3) The Raid guys from TFA. Because they were criminally underused. And I think we didn’t actually see most of them getting killed, sooo…

[majingojira]

120 Years, 120 Monsters, Days 27, 28, and 29

This one is going to be a doozy! 

101) The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002) - Orcs/Uruk-Hai

One of J.R.R. Tolkien's original creations for his Mythopoeia were the Orcs, and their spawn the Uruk-Hai.  They’re the template example of the ‘evil minion’ that can be slaughtered in droves yet still poses a danger if only from their numbers.  

Crude, vile, filthy, disgusting, rough, and cannibalistic, the Orcs were made to be as repulsive as possible, and that made them memorable.

102) The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003) - Nazgul/Ringwraiths

Eh, might as well complete the trilogy.  With only one monster left to claim as its own, but still so many to choose from, it was a hard choice to make.  I decided to go with the one that has their own memorable musical motif.  

The Nazgul are an inspiration for every kind of “Undead” in gaming fiction.  Men who were granted immortality thanks to their magic rings, but their bodies did not last with them.  So now they are wraiths that animate armor and clothes in order to affect the world of the living.  Capable of dark sorcery, a shriek that drives men to madness, weapons capable of making more like themselves, and being unkillable save a few specific methods.  Drawing from old folklore and myth, it became a standard for generations to come.

And with their horses gone, they upgrade their mounts to Fell Beasts for the movie -- winged horrors that allow them to take down armies almost by themselves.  Since they are the inspiration for so many RPG horrors, I think the best way to describe how terrifyingly powerful and dangerous the Ringwraiths are is with an RPG term.

“HAX!  I CALL HAX!”

103) Freddy vs. Jason (2003)     - Jason Voorhees

Jason had to be on the list, but let’s be honest with ourselves: they were pretty crap for the most part. Often incoherent, relying more on spectacle than story, they’re good schlock at best, but some are also quite painful.  And he didn’t become a true monster until later in the series.  Before that, he was a human killer, and before that the killer was his mom and the best scare of the movie came from a damn dream sequence.  

Which is probably why, in the end, I went with the one where he fights the incarnation of nightmares for the film to include him in.  This was a labor of love, and that love shows through the film.  As you might have guessed, I’m not a fan of the Friday the 13th movie series. The love this movie shows that series makes me want to give them another chance (or a chance in some cases).  

As to Jason himself, he is in pretty good form. Archetypal “Slasher” or “Relentless Undead”. Driven to kill in part for revenge, in part mad obsession against perceived impropriety, and in part because his mommy told him.  It makes him more . . . sympathetic.  He’s still a remorseless killer, and nearly unstoppable juggernaut, but he’s the lesser of two evils here.

But that bar is REALLY low.

104) Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban (2004) - Dementors

Harry Potter had a lot of creatures in it, some from folklore, others were unique.  But only one really, truly resonated.  Those were the Dementors.  According to the writer, they were her expression of depression.  What it did to her is what the dementors do to others.  It’s quite succinct, but that’s what they are.  It’s a YA series, they can be deep, but sometimes the meaning is spelled out clearly.  

Their design, faceless, shadowy wraiths, works well to support them as incarnations of depression.  Plus the mouth the movie’s give them is just damn creepy.

105) Call of Cthulhu (2005) - Cthulhu

H.P. Lovecraft’s works have had a long and powerful influence on monsters, but his work has rarely been translated to film, and even rarer has it been done well.  One of those exceptions goes to a group of dedicated fans of Lovecraft: The H.P. Lovecraft Historical Society who made an adaptation of one of his most famous works . . . as a silent film.  They made it as though it were adapted around the time it was printed.  

This choice allows for low budget and simple effects to carry the day.  It turns R’lyeh into full expressionist germanic horror. Including some practical effects taking advantage of visual illusions (creating a concave structure that looks convex, etc).  

Lovecraft’s stories are generally about the buildup, and the film works well in that regard.  It convinces the audience of the insignificance of man in the setting, and the reach and power of the sleeping god-monster.  Once Cthulhu shows up, there’s no real dialogue for that sequence. The actions are all primal and universal, with R’lyeh as much a danger as Cthulhu himself at times.  

There is one change: Cthulhu doesn’t ignore the poor humans.  It considers them.  Little more than pests, but it still considers them.  

And he’s a GREAT stop-motion effect, and even once shown, he is kept in shadow and shown only in part, adding to the menace he emanates.

106) The Host (2006) - Gwoemul

The Host is an odd film.  One part comedy, one part tragedy, one part absurdity, one part social commentary.  In the end, it works, but it’s an odd journey to get there.  

The creature itself is a mutation, and one of the best looking mutations I’ve seen.  It’s so mutated that it’s hard to identify exactly what it is, or what it was to start with.  Most mutants in fiction are just organism A + Extra stuff.  This thing is . . . well, aside from being horrendously ugly and amphibious it’s hard to say what it is, exactly.  And that works well in its favor.

The creature also moves around and acts as though it were in constant pain, which is another nice touch.  It is still a villainous beast at the end of the day, but the constant pain it feels and its need to feed make its actions understandable.  

107) The Mist (2007) - The Leviathan

The Mist has a great, simple premise.  “A fog rolls into town and a person with blood on their shirt comes running out, screaming ‘There’s something in the mist!’”

It’s so simple, it’s brilliant.  What is in the mist?  An entire alien ecosystem, foreign enough to be hard to kill, but close enough to eat us without suffering.  Of these, one monster stands above all the others (literally).  A creature as massive as a whale that has other horrors following in its wake.  After all the monsters and killer creatures (and madness driven humans), it shows up and easily demonstrates how insignificant humans are in this strange world order that peaked into our world.  It doesn’t interact with the survivors, it just passes by as the things which they thought were the deadliest things in the mist fly around it to pick up its scraps.  No more than oxpeckers to the horror.

It says so much with so little screentime.

Also, the ending of this movie messed me up in all the best ways.  

108) Cloverfield (2008) - Clover

This was America’s giant monster answer to 9-11 as Godzilla was to Japan after Hiroshima.  It didn’t quite work out as well, but it was still a good monster and good film.

I think part of the reason why Godzilla worked, and Clover did not has to do with symbolic resonance.  He manages to capture the fear, confusion, and similar fears brought up by the incident, but doesn’t go to the same lengths and depths of understanding of the situation (because, frankly, almost no one understood them yet at the time, at least not fully, as it was the result of almost 100 years of turmoil that can date itself back to the FIRST World War).  

The creature is just as confused as everyone else in the movie, which is a stark contrast to all that possible allegorical connection.  Still, it set one thing up: Large American monsters would have a bent-legged stance from here on out.  

109) Trollhunter (2010) - Trolls

A variety of perspectives and stories is always helpful.  It’s as true in life, as it is in film.  This is partly why I tried to include a few of the foreign film monsters that I have seen (that are worth it, I’ve seen some that were derivative as hell without adding much worthwhile).  So I was quite pleased to include Trollhunter on this list.

It walks a fine line between horror and comedy, which I always appreciate. It also treats the Trolls as sources of horror as well as treating them as big, dumb, dangerous animals.  All the strangeness of them is explained decently (they’re so dumb because of what they eat for the most part -- a mix of meat and rock, they turn to “Stone” because of a runaway chain reaction of calcium buildup due to an inability to process vitamin E or some such technobabble), save one detail from the folklore.

They can still smell the blood of a Christian man.  

The Found Footage style makes sense here and works well with it, and leads to some interesting humor beyond the usual “Camera Damage’.  We get humor ranging from surprise reveals to the mundanity of what really should be an awesome sounding job (To meme: Paperwork? For my troll hunter? It’s more likely than you might expect!).  The FX are convincing but what really sells it is the title character and his interactions with the creatures.  They’re just animals, big and dumb, and he has to clean up after them.  And his job is as terrible as you might expect.  It’s one part character study, one part journey into a hidden world.  And I’m a sucker for that sort of mix.  

110) How to Train your Dragon (2010) - Dragons

The Dragon in folklore, myth, and religion is one of the most diverse creatures within those fields.  Beyond even the vampire, which at times usually means “Usually nocturnal thing that attacks people in a debilitating/draining way rather than outright killing them”.  Very few movies go into the sheer variety the dragon can encompass.  They usually focus on one individual dragon or one species of dragon.  Before this series of books was turned into a movie and TV franchise of epic proportions, the only thing that even came close to doing that was the Rankin-Bass animated feature Flight of Dragons.  Which showed two main varieties of Dragon (Eastern and Western).  

The advent of cheaper CG allowed for a whole slew of dragon shapes and sizes to be used and while they didn’t go as nuts as some of the folklore went, they made a really good effort.  And one that I think should be rewarded.  

While the ones in the film have a similar general behavior (in the way that big cats have similar behavior), the visual variety made them a treat to all see on the screen at once.

[radiowrites]

Tea & Mochi

Mai has been able to taste more teas and sweets ever since Masako and Ayako have been coming over once a month to visit and chat.

Read it on: FF.net / AO3 / Below the cut!

A Ghost Hunt fanfiction by Coriana [one shot, 2100 words]

Ah, I frankly hated when it was my turn, every three months, to supply something for Masako, Ayako, and I's get-togethers.

I couldn't help it that my taste buds were of higher quality, even though all I could buy from the store was mochi and bancha. Masako and Ayako on the other hand were able to afford their (and mine) expensive taste buds.

Thankfully it wasn't my turn to choose the tea (although, really, Masako and Ayako 'happened' to bring by sencha these last few times). I can't help that I still choose to purchase my lesser-class, strongly scented green tea. It had grown on me. I told them even though it is a cheap tea, it's still good for you. But remembering Ayako's priceless face, which had been raised on the expensive green leaves of gyokuro and shincha tea, would always remain a precious memory from when I had served her bancha.

But Ayako would not be coming tonight.

And it wasn't because I had served her bancha that day.

I mean, sheesh. Seriously, who would stay with their husband on a girl's night out…?

Hm. I wondered what type of tea for two Masako would bring, since it was her turn this month.

Every month for the past few years the three of us would get together (at traditionally, my house, but now that I think about it I don't know why) and we'd bring tea and sweets and simply just watch movies and talk. These times were always bubbly, happy memories that I held onto.

I've tried so many different treats and teas thanks to them these last few years. Ayako even bought me my own dobin teapot for my birthday last year.

So here I was at the confectionery shop trying to decide what I would bring that may or may not compliment Masako's tea. I settled on daifuku. Soft, round mounds of dusted rice cakes filled with sweet red bean paste. I kind of wanted to buy uirō, too. Thick, chewy, steamed rice bricks of all colors, just like what Ayako brought last time (except she had made them…) but I thought that was maybe over doing it.

As I was walking home, I again got distracted by my local convenience store, as I had when I had walked by it previously. I really wanted to do it as a joke, but… I really shouldn't.

Before I knew it I was walking back to my apartment with the box of sweets tucked under one arm and holding a case of canned Chu-hi in my other hand. 9% alcohol isn't that much, right? Besides, I liked the flavor of strawberry. It kind of made me laugh to think of whatever high-class tea Masako will prepare and then handing her a can of sugary alcohol.

Ha.

When I got home I changed into shorts and a loose tank. I had managed to clean and tidy my apartment earlier this Saturday. Hey, this has actually been really good for me that we always did it at my house – it always got cleaned once a month.

I started setting out the daifuku and wished that I had bought the uirō. I hope next month Masako brings monaka wagashi again like she had last time she had brought the sweets. Sweet bean jam sandwiched between thin wafers? Mmmm.

I filled the kettle with water and put it on low. Ayako basically bashed into my head that water for tea should always be near boiling but never actually boiling. Even though I told her you were supposed to boil water for bancha, she would hear none of it.

Yada, yada.

I wanted to bring out my dobin. I loved my dobin. I kept it in my only closed glass door cabinet, and I took it out during our monthly gatherings, or any time I felt the need to be special. It's the cutest little rounded teapot, an earthy green with delicate yellow flowers surrounding its darker banded girth. It had an upturned spout and a flat lid. Its domed handle was woven wood.

Yeah.

Basically I just liked to hold it.

Masako would usually bring her high-quality sencha and her round delicate pink kyusu with its short, cubby handle that jutted out of its side.

Her sencha laughed at my bancha.

I sat on the couch and ate a daifuku, rearranging them on the plate so that it didn't seem like I had eaten one. It was odd for her not to be here yet, she was normally prompt. I had turned off the water in fear of it boiling and the wrath of Ayako if she heard the rumor that I had boiled water for tea.

This wasn't the first time that Ayako hadn't come, but maybe Masako was deciding that she didn't want my personal company this evening.

I accidentally consumed another daifuku as I thought.

Feeling a tad lonely in the guise of anxious waiting, my wandering mind drifted to Ayako and Monk getting married three months ago. It had been the first real wedding that I had ever attended and really been a part of. Masako and I had gone with Ayako and her mother to look at dresses and cosmetics. I had even gotten a dark blue sundress bought for me for the occasion. I got to go to the salon, too.

I was mysterious in blue with curled and crimped hair. Make-up on my face, my lips dabbed in red, my eyes outlined in shadows. Black high-heels on my feet. I was nothing compared to the real bride, with her silky red hair rolled into curls and her stunning white lace and chiffon dress.

Ah, Monk and Ayako's wedding album was to die for, it was so artistic and dramatic. Amusing, too, in a way, with Ayako's posh and poised friends and family. Monk's family was respectable. His friends were another story.

Masako and I were in a few pictures, too. Close-up shots of us side-by-side, cheek-to-cheek, looking very poised. And of course with the bride, too. It made me pleased to see how much of a counterpart doll I looked next to Masako with make-up on.

It was a day where I had felt good about myself, where I actually felt beautiful and alluring.

So it happened to be the day that Noll didn't show up.

The door emitted knocking sounds as I pondered if anyone would notice another daifuku had disappeared.

Masako both looked exhausted and happy. She immediately slipped off her high-heels and ran a hand through her hair as she let out a gust of a sigh. "I landed the movie role."

"Ehhh? You did it this time!" I was pleased I was the first (or, well, almost the first, I'm sure) to have heard this news. I spread out my hands to emphasize big letters. "Masako Hara makes massive splash into the movie industry with debut title."

"I'm not even thinking that far yet," said Masako as she unpacked her tea caddy and kyusu.

Oh! I should turn the water back on!

Masako had been trying for movie roles these last few years, landing minor ones. She did modeling on the side, but her TV show had its last episode three years ago. I think the main problem was her agent apparently thought she should only be doing horror movies, due to her background, as if Masako had needed any more horror in her short life. This was one of the three romantic comedies she had auditioned for, and her looks obviously suited the needs of the character's role.

Oh, and perhaps her talent did, too. Haaaah…

Masako stuffed a daifuku in her mouth and already had another one in her hand as she chewed. She was probably starving from her busy day. Maybe I should make her rice or something…? Nah, the daifuku should fill her up.

Before turning the water back on for tea, I thought this was a perfect time to make my surprise. "Well, since we're celebrating," I said. I went to the kitchenette and pulled two cans of Chu-hi from the fridge. "Congratulations."

She laughed, but didn't accept the can. She didn't look as shocked as I would have liked, either.

Instead she leaned back into her bag and brought out a tall slim bottle of Umeshu. 15% alcohol, steeped ume fruits in shochu (they were still in there at the bottom), sweetly tart tanned liquid... She had planned ahead.

"Ah, you always have to outdo me…" I said as I set the little cans on the small table and went to get glasses for the fruit liqueur.

We watched mostly romantic comedies. Or, well, we dissected and analyzed and laughed at them all the way though. We were doing it for research for Masako's upcoming role.

Maybe the movies we picked were just bad. Maybe we were just a little tipsy and everything seemed funny.

At the end of the last movie, Masako's happy laugh turned into a sad sigh as the credits rolled.

"Eh? Everything okay?"

"I guess," Masako said, looking downcast and solemn, the stark opposite that she had been a moment earlier. "I might not be able to come to these gatherings anymore. I guess that I might get too busy."

I kept my smile on, the alcohol dimming the truth of the words. "Oh, you know it's fine. Ayako will still come and then you can come whenever you can –"

With a halt, I contemplated. The last daifuku seemingly jumped into my hand. "I guess Ayako is going to get busy, too." It felt a little weird to me. Masako was moving forward in her life and career, and so was Ayako.

Things were changing but I was still me.

Masako patted my shoulder. "It's okay, Mai, it's not like we won't ever see each other again. We're going to keep in touch. We can still get coffee together like we do now. And we're still going to be able to get together. We're not going to be busy all the time."

"That's right," I said, "I know that. It just felt a little weird all of the sudden. You know, Masako, my door is always open, okay? So you don't have to feel lonely."

Masako smiled. "Thanks, Mai. Maybe you'll be able to come see me on set, too? Wouldn't that be cool?" Masako's eyebrows waggled. "Maybe you can even land a role, you know?"

I lightly punched her in the arm. "Oh, please. I can't act at all. You learned that when you were practicing your script with me. I'm terrible."

In the end, we decided to watch one more movie, but it ended sadder than we had both anticipated, so then it was time to call it quits. It was time for Masako to catch the bus, too.

At the door, I watched her put her heels on, carrying her tea caddy. I was leaning against the door frame, kind of toasted and thinking sleep was a really good idea.

"Listen, Mai," Masako said, after our final hug goodbye. "I won't forget about you, right?"

"Of course, Masako, I know that. You too, 'kay? I've been living alone almost all my life, I won't be bothered by it. I'll be waiting here for you guys, someone has to keep the group together, right? Bye, Masako."

But once she was gone, and I was left alone in my apartment, I felt different. Masako had a new job career. Ayako and Monk were together and moving on. John had to return to Australia. Yasu was super busy with college still. Noll and Lin kept to themselves, like always.

Already I had failed in keeping the group together.

Here I was, comforting and telling people not to be lonely, when it might actually be I who was seeking the comfort of having them close, so that I would not be lonely.

Ah, I'm so selfish and I don't even realize it.

"I'm fine," I told myself as I finished cleaning the aftereffects Masako's visit. "They can all take care of themselves."

But then it happened, and I didn't even know what was happening. Tears pooled from my eyes and spilled down my cheeks and I stifled my quiet sobs, afraid someone might hear me.

 But who's going to take care of me?

Notes: personally I like formosa oolong and jasmine green tea.