#i think zelda would be like 'just fucking sleep in the bed' and link's like ':/ no...'

[slime-crafters]

It's honestly funny to see people say that Link and Zelda cohabitated in Link's Hateno Village house since there's two of everything but there's only one pillow. What kind of couple shares not only a twin-sized mattress but also a small pillow.

Therefore, I think Link sleeps on the floor to guard Zelda like a dog while she sleeps in the bed. Like... Link's the kinda guy who'd say, "why do I need to take a bath??? I swim in rivers and lakes, doesn't that count????"

[oursecretways]

Is this what you call self-care?

Felix × Reader note(s): I am at the point where I feel like playing 72 hours of Stardew Valley is perfectly reasonable, so I hope u enjoy my first fanfic. Also, idk about you, but I feel like he would def enjoy some Zelda 😌… also, this isn't the longest fic out there, but it is a short story after all. Enjoy!☻ genre(s): fluff, silce of life word count: 1,795 warning(s): light cursing Just a chill day with Felix, while you’re trying to make progress with your uni work

masterlist

It was a regular Saturday for you, waking up at 6 AM and feeling your boyfriend's arm around you. After you turn your alarm off, you turn to look at him, smiling. His long, blond hair fell into his angelic face. It is so hard to not say fuck it and stay in bed with Felix, but you—with the smallest of movements to not wake him—get out of bed, making your way to the bathroom to get ready. After you get yourself into some comfy stay-at-home-and-study clothes, you brew yourself a cup of coffee with some coconut milk.

You've been researching for your midterm paper for a while now. It wasn't the worst topic, but selecting what's important and what isn't is where you were hopeless.

After restarting it for the hundredth time, you heard movements from your bedroom. You peeked out of the study/gaming room to see Felix's tired face, which filled your heart with warmth. "Good morning, love. How did you sleep?" He looked back at you while he grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge. "I slept well until some gremlin left from next to me way too early this morning." A smile crept up his face, reaching out for your hand so he could pull you in for a hug. He kept you close with one hand, resting his face on your head while you hid in the crook of his neck. His sweet scent filling your nose. "How's your university work going?" you scrunch your face, not even wanting to think about the research and writing your essay. "Well, I read a lot, but I do not know where to begin or what things are the necessities to put into my paper." You felt yourself wanting to throw a tantrum like the 5-year-old who you are at heart. He kissed your forehead, then put his pinky out. "Okay, I have a trade offer; once you're halfway done, we can play on our farm together." Your eyes lit up. You've been pretty hooked on Stardew Valley for a while now, especially since the new update, and you got Felix to play with you on his days off. Sadly, they've been pretty busy with their comeback, so you couldn't hang out as much. He usually got home by the time you were asleep, and you went to class or to the library to learn before he woke up, since it was soon time for your final exams. You only have one year back from your university, and you don't want setbacks, so it is important to get a good grade. Your parents would be pleased as well since you flew to another city to learn specifically there, so you want to make them proud. You link your pinkies together to form an unbreakable promise. "Okay, but no distractions! If you want to play, please play in the living room; we both know I won't ever finish my assignment with you distracting me." He chuckles and nods his head in agreement. You happily made yourself another cup of coffee, then went back to the study to work on your task. You still cannot believe it that you somehow snagged such a perfect man: he is supportive, understands your concerns, and can always accept your compromises. He openly talks to you about how he feels and bravely tells you if something bothers or concerns him. You honestly can't believe these past couple years have been real.

You've made a bit of progress; it helped that you talked with your old dorm roommates—you moved in with Felix about half a year now; you two realized that it would be the easiest since you went over any given chance anyways. They gave some good suggestions. Once you caught up with each other, you four said your goodbyes, since all of you have a lot of work to get done by the end of this month. After some time, you smelled a sweet scent coming from the kitchen. The door opened before you could sneak out to have a peek. Felix brought in your favorite cookies; it was a mixture of his classic chocolate chip and your oatmeal cookies recipe. You two perfected it while he got some time off, and you didn't have school just yet. His brown eyes looked at you proudly behind the plate of cookies with milk in his other hand. "How's your progress, baby?" He bent down to give you a peck on the lips. You waited until he put the plate and the cup down, then patted the ground next to you, signaling for him to sit down. He didn't waste any seconds, and plopped right next to you, happy that he could sit beside his girlfriend. Felix didn't want to make you feel pressured; he just wants to spend as much time as possible with you before he has to go back to endless dance practice, content creation, etcetera. You both know he loves doing what he does, but it can get overwhelming sometimes. They got cussed out a lot for the smallest of things, getting bullied and going as far as getting death treats. He was grateful for being able to work his dream job, and he is also happy that you understand what this kind of life comes with.

Felix watched you type your thoughts out in your document and started to play with your hair, which made you relax instantly. You couldn't help but melt into his touch. You leaned onto his shoulder, feeling exhausted. "I am almost done with half of my assignment; I just need another page, but I feel like my brain cells are giving up on me." He chuckled, placing a kiss on your head. "You got this; I believe in you." He started giving kisses all around your face, which soothed your tired thoughts. Felix eventually kissed your lips; the kiss was sweet and made you feel like you're under the sun at the beginning of the spring. You reciprocated immediately, feeling as though time had stopped—no tasks, no school, no pressure—just you and him tangled together in a complete state of Nirvana. Before it could get heated, Lixie pulled away, holding you firmly, so he kept up his strenght to not distract you further. "Is it okay if I play Zelda while I lay in your lap?" You saw a hint of pink on his face, making you smile. "Well, I am close to finishing it, so why not? I don't think it can cause any harm." Felix got up excitedly to get his switch with his headphones. He laid down and got comfortable, then started playing his game. He has been quite into it lately. The game was beautiful, and there were a lot of things to do. The excitement in him got you into playing it, asking for his help in some harder situations.

When you got done with half of your paper, you looked down and saw a sleeping Felix with a gaming console on the ground next to him. He looked so peaceful like this: his pink lips parted, his eyelashes casting shadows on his face, and his freckles painting constellations onto his features. You can't help but start connecting the dots on his face with your fingers, making his eyes flutter as he awakens. "What are you doing, gorgeous?" You lean down to kiss him as a response. You feel like you're going to explode with all the feelings inside your chest. "I am done with half of my paper; I didn't want to wake you, sorry." You pout just a little, earning a smile as he reaches for your face to caress it. "That's my good girl. Are you ready for some farming time?" You nod, knowing that you're going to end up either playing until the sun gets up again or none at all and will end up cuddling in bed.

You two made some lunch and plopped down besides each other. Your desks have been set against one another, his PC taking up one desk while yours is cluttered by notes and books for your university courses; you just keep pushing it back each time you take your laptop out instead of organizing it. Felix tried to reason with you or help with that mess, but that's how you were, looking unorganized yet knowing exactly what is where, always on point. That's what your grades always reflect: perfect or almost perfect scores, even though you procrastinate until the last minute. He smiled to himself, knowing how he and the boys wished they had this superpower.

You put on your two's favorite chill playlist and booted up the game. We made a lot of progress, stopping to occasionally show physical affection for each other or taking a quick bathroom or snack break. I didn't even notice how the time flied until you looked down on your watch, seeing that it had passed five a.m. "Yongbok, we have a problem. Have you checked the time?" He has been so into the game that he almost looked up into the corner to see the in-game time, realizing that this might become a problem in the future. "Oh shit, I didn't notice when it got this late. I mean, I am going to be okay; I won't work for a couple of days now, but when do you need to send this assignment in?" he asked, knowing damn well that you have a habit of sending in your tasks with one minute left on the clock, giving him a scare. One time, Chan got to see your study progress and felt his soul leave his body. He still remembers how he and Han watched how their leader scolded you about your academics and your attitude towards your learning, painting a picture of an overworked father lecturing his rebellious daughter, who—no matter what she's doing—will always be his treasure. It never got said out loud, but you became the younger sister of the group, with all the older members looking out for your happiness and safety. And Felix isn't sure that if you two ever break up—which, let's face it, is highly unlikely—he wouldn't get the shorter stick and wouldn't get scolded.

Once you two saved and logged off for the day, got ready for bed, you snuggled close to each other leaving sweet kisses on one another, fighting the strong urge to sleep. When he heard your breathing change, he knew that you were fast asleep, what he waited for all along. It makes him happy and calm, knowing you are asleep. He pressed a light kiss on your forehead.

"Good night, my love," and with that, he dozed off to sleep as well.

[wayfayrr]

The Menace returns! And you choose Trauma so this is not a Link!Reader but someone who caused a trauma to someone else.

Here we go to the person that SCARRED our Vet to beyond belief. Marin!Reader and now I finally could write it down as I didn't want to make it a second dream section with all of the Chain as they all would be scarred for life and well, Legend would want to die. So and thanks to Gliphy I got the perfect idea with Marin!Reader.

They were the Marin on Koholint, so they are Legend's first love!

They live but just in a different world entirely. (My own theory on that)

They still remember Legend and hope he is doing well.

They still sing to animals and people.

After Legend finds them, he is at first suspicious. It could be a trap from the Shadow.

But his brain couldn't stop him from rushing to their side and holding them in his arms again.

They are a sweetheart and are holding Legends with such care when they sing him a lullaby.

The Vet will not be able to sleep without them in his arms anymore.

Their weapon is the Sea Lily Bell and Awakening Bell like in Hyrule Warriors.

The Chain is stunned and confused how a person with such a soft voice and delicate body fight monsters like a knight and with a bell no less.

I believe that there are two groups in the Yandere Chain.

Group one will be the one's that have practically a suffocating possessiveness and are overprotective. In the group is Legend, Twilight, Wild, Four and surprisingly Sky.

Before you scream, let me explain.

I think, that Sky would be possessive despite the usual Headcanons BECAUSE he lost Zelda during his journey multiple times.

Once she was led away from him by Impa, then she disappeared into a portal into the past, then she sealed herself into a crystal for that seal on Demise and lastly she almost lost her soul because of Ghirahim. Yeah, no way in hell you can tell me, that he wouldn't be overprotective and possessive over his darling after these stunts.

The second group is overbearing and/or cautious of Reader, not because they don't trust them.

No! They are cautious about the people around Reader.

Reader has a bleeding heart and would try to help anyone they found. Nevermind if it's a enemy or an ally.

This group has Wars, Time, Four (again) and Hyrule in it.

I hope everyone of them is self-explanatory.

Legend sees them as his future spouse. He knew them the longest! And has a history with them!

So he even sees the Chain as enemy, especially Wars.

But he would never kidnap them, he knew how they felt about being caged as he met them on Koholint.

But he talks smack about the Chain.

So he is more trustworthy than the others. So he stands in a better light than the others. So they fell rather in love with him than any of the other eight heroes. So they run into his arms if they got scared.

He gave them a ring, of course a magical one. But it's more than that, he wears the second one of them and as long as they both wear this specific ring, Legend is able to find them.

Legend is also clingy, very clingy.

Wars has to adapt plans so the Vet sees Reader. Because if he doesn't, he will go nuts.

He will use every trick he has in his sleeves to find them and if the others die in the process, he doesn't fucking care.

If Reader is tucking Wind into bed like an older sibling would and singing him a lullaby. Legend is so jealous but at the same time, he sees Reader with his and their children. So the jealousy disappears and he just watches them with Wind with fond eyes while daydreaming.

Sky teached them lyrics from his era, so they sing to him as he plays his harp.

Twilight has the time of his life as Wolfie, they sing to him, pet him, forehead kisses.

Bunny!Legend got it even better, he is very smug about it. Reader will carry him, pet him, kiss his nose, take care of his vest, protect him from Wild and if they are in an inn while Legend is a bunny, they will sleep with him in a bed and held him close to their chest.

They even bath together.

He thanked every existing deity, that Reader didn't know he was the bunny or he would die, happy but he dies.

Just because he saw them naked, something nobody of the Chain did only him.

Wars first, tries to find out how Legend was back then as they met but after falling in love he write poetry for them and they write with him song lyrics of ballads.

Time knows them from the War of Eras and is embarrassed to see them. Let's just say, Reader treated him like a child and never left his side through the whole war. But now he only sees the perfect parent in them.

They switch with Wild so he could sleep longer every once in a while and they cook breakfast in the meantime.

Hyrule sees how much the Vet loves their singer. But as a Fae he got drawn in and is always near them when they sing.

Four asks about the Bells as they are a strange weapon choice.

Their song is "Celestial" from Ed Sheeran.

How they met.

Legend's PoV:

We walked around my Hyrule, inside a forest to be more specific. We wandered through it and didn't found any monsters but there were little puddles and footprints inside the mud. So we followed the track until we found a person lying on the ground. All except for me run to the Hylian. Their blue clothes were so familiar like their hair and as they turned the person around. So we could see their face. I could see a red island flower in their hair and I saw a face of someone I thought would never see again. My brain cried out, that it could be a trap from the shadow but my feet just started to sprint to them. I ripped them from the hands of one of the others and held them close to my chest. I knew, that my house was near. So I picked them up and carried them to my home. The others just followed me and were calling out to me not to be reckless and even my brain still screamed that this was a trap but my body moved on it's own. I carried Reader into my house and laid them in my bed before tucking them under the covers. I didn't care if my bed got muddy or anything. I grabbed a chair and sat myself beside them. They had some cuts and bruises but nothing serious, thank The Golden Three for that. I held their hand in mine and even kissed their knuckles as I ignored the group who questioned me and my motives to bring "a stranger" into my house. My Love stirred and I felt a little more force as they squeeze my hand ever so slightly. They laid in my bed for few hours before they woke up and I can remember how relieved I was. They opened their eyes, they looked around and as their beautiful eyes laid upon me. They smiled and giggled their melodic laughter.

„Hehehehe... Seems like our roles are know reversed, did you found me on the beach as well?“

I snorted at their silliness. „Yes, our roles are now reversed but you laid inside a forest in mud and not in sand by a beautiful beach... But how are you here, Reader... You should be...“

„The Wind Fish fulfilled my wish! I had to do something for him but that was no big deal! Now I can finally see the world outside of Koholint, Link! Maybe you can show me around?“ I turned red as they said my name and right now I didn't care if it was a trap or not. They were back and real! I smiled at them and nodded.

„Of course, I can! I promised it on the log by the beach remember?“

„I know... But you also said you are a hero so you must be very busy... I don't want to steal your precious time... And I said you should forget about that!“ It was like an arrow was fired through my heart and my face and ear tips turned bright red. They were way too kind for the cruel world of Hyrule.

„Sorry, to interrupt your reunion? But who are you and how do you fight all these monsters inside the forest?“ asked the Captain and I just glared at him for interrupting our conversation.

Reader began to sat up, were I jumped up and helped them.

„Be careful.“ they still held my hand but I was more concerned about the Captain. If he tries to take Reader away from me, then he will have some things coming for him!

„Oh I remember you! You were the soldier in the war I should help out to get my wish fulfilled! I never asked for your name! I'm Reader and just like back then I dealt with them with my Sea Lily Bell and water magic.“ they smiled but I couldn't concentrate as THEY knew the Captain!

My head snapped to the Captain who seemed to recognise my first love.

„Ohhh the Hylian with that strange bell and has the Wind Fish as companion. How did you land inside the forest?“ I squeezed their hand slightly and they looked at me while squeezing back.

„I wished to be free from the island I lived on and wished to be with Link! I didn't see him for so long! But I wished that I had stayed awake then I could've greet him properly!“ They hugged me which I reciprocated to hide my even redder face in their shoulder and my ears which wiggled slightly.

I felt them pet my head as they said something which shocked not only me but all of us.

„Oh there are also the two kids from back then! Hey long time no see! You grown so much! One of you even outgrow me! Hihihihihi... But I still don't know your names as the war kinda kept me busy.“

I looked with my eyes to the others and saw how the old man scratched his neck and Wind rushed towards us.

„You are that Hylian with the cool water magic!? It's really been long, you didn't change one bit!!“

They laughed and combed through my hair that my head became drowsy and I felt sleepy.

„Our name is Link, Reader so that's why we are called by our title. You may call me "Time", the boy is "Wind", then there is Warrior, Twilight, Four, Hyrule, Wild, Sky and the one in your arms is called "Legend".“ they nodded and kissed my head.

„I don't care, if you call him "Legend" for me, he is Link!“ My hold around them grew stronger and I fell asleep with my beloved in my arms. It felt like I was finally being able to fall asleep after years of being kept awake...

This is how they met the "Singer" and Legend's first love! Of course, they all noticed how the Vet was acting around them. He was more open and expressive and less snarky. He will be going more and more possessive that even Yandere Twilight would be nothing against him. Wolves are protective over their mates and pups but Legend put that to shame. Sky always starts to play his harp as soon he sees Reader is near him, so they begin to play the bell and sing with him. They sometimes even do a duet with Wild. Apropos Wild, they cook together and dance with him just to have fun and to be silly. Time sees them as the perfect parent from his previous encounters with them but also loves to listen to them sing him a lullaby. But he knows that Reader would be never allowed to be on watch duty, especially not alone. And even thought they fought for being at least on watch duty. They are allowed to but only with Legend as they sleep in the same bedroll and they don't want to imagine what will happen to them and anything around them, if a sleeping Veteran noticed that Reader isn't beside him anymore. Wars talks to them a lot because of their magic and the different bells. Four learned specifically for them how to maintain their bells. Wind uses his "Little Brother Privileges" he gets lullabies, cuddles, playtime anything he wants until Time or Legend separate them, mostly Legend. Hyrule just loves to hear them sing. He isn't confident enough too even mention his feelings for them to the others. Twilight gets "Wolfie Privileges" but also as Hylian he gets attention from Reader. But none of them get as much attention as Legend as he is the closest to them after all.

The Menace will return next week with new words! INTO THE MENACE CAVE!!

I love the twist of being a different world rather than simply just the windfish's dream, legend deserves that little bit of healing at least after everything else he's gone through

And also I agree with how you've characterised the yans!!! I haven't put out my full headcanons for each of them yet (I really need to but they're pretty low on my things to finish and post of wips ngl) But I do have sky's out! and I do see him as very possessive but simply not showing it as much as the rest - he's a manipulative yan more than anything. <3

Legend has EVERY reason to be more cautious of wars, like you said of course legend has the upper hand since he has history with reader but so does warriors, he knew reader during the war of ages so of course he's going to be more defensive against him (time is only safe because he was a kid and doesn't see em in a romantic light)

the way they met is also really sweet, being the opposite of how legend and them met for the first time. I bet he simply wishes that it was after he was finished with this quest so that he could have them to himself instead.

[redisaid]

Sad Machine

After (Part 1 of 2)

Don’t look over here. This isn’t BotW/TotK. This isn’t my only straight ship that got some sad easter eggs in the new game. This isn’t in second fucking person.

That’s a lie. It’s all a lie. Oops, this is Zelink sad introspection written in second person. I got the first line caught in my head and it spiraled.

There will be a part 2 when I finish TotK, because honey we need to talk about the [redacted]. Tiny spoilers for TotK in here, mostly regarding what you find out about Zelda in Hateno. 

I promise I will get back on Blue Moon soon.

5325 Words

Read it on Ao3!

I don't know much about your life beyond these walls The fleeting sense of love within these God forsaken halls And I can hear it in his voice in every call This girl who slept a hundred years has something after all

He is all you have.

You’ve known this fact for such a long time that it resonates in your very bones. Funny, how odd it feels to have bones again. But as you stand before him, descending in a beam of light, born anew from triumph as he was, but minus the scars, all you can ask him is, “Do you really remember me?”

He seems to think about the answer for a while. Eventually, he nods.

You both know it’s a lie, but you laugh the creakiness from your lungs and you embrace him.

You held him only once before, as he lay dying in your arms. That one final failure that was too much to bear, enough to bring out the goddess in you. It still stings that this was all you could give him, a promise he would be okay, even as he slipped away, and a blinding light you still didn’t understand.

He holds you too. Whether out of attachment or relief or something else, you don’t know. You never really did, and now it is even more complicated. He held you once before too, only once, but does it count? Was this even the same Link?

You collapsed then, falling into him with bitter tears. Your friends were dead. Your father too. He was all you had left, and all you could do for him was blame yourself. Link didn’t even argue, but he held you as he cried. He didn’t say anything to assure you, but steadied you to your feet again, and held your hand as you ran and ran.

You didn’t deserve his sympathy, even then. You were so callous and cruel to him. You treated him like furniture--ugly, unwanted furniture. He was always in the room and always a reminder that you were not what you should have been. He followed you dutifully, and you just wanted to be alone.

Now you cannot imagine what will happen if he lets you go. If you let him go.

Eventually, it happens. The sun wanes and Hyrule Field smells of flowers, and there is a future to consider. Despite having fought for it with every ounce of your being, you have not considered it.

Link whistles for his horse and helps you onto her back. He rides and you do not ask where he is taking you. For once, you learn from his silence.

You cling to his waist until you reach Kakariko that night.

You sleep in Impa’s granddaughter’s bed. Or try to, at least. You have forgotten what it’s like to have a body and do not understand its needs. But you do know that the way Paya blushes at Link makes you feel something ugly that you cannot name, will not name. Before, you would very much want to name it, to research it, to pin it down and know it.

Now, you are not sure.

When you ask where Link will stay, Impa doesn’t seem concerned. He shrugs his answer.

You find him outside, sitting on her roof. The moon is full but doesn’t bleed red. You have no warning for him, no dark prophecy. He cannot sleep and neither can you. Both of you have forgotten how to rest.

He looks down at you, his eyes the same blue that could be anything, mean anything. You hated him because you never knew what he was thinking, so you assumed it was that he was better than you.

You fell in love with him after you asked him what he really thought. Why he was so silent in his vigilance.

He answered you, voice so quiet it was almost a whisper. He was afraid to speak. He was afraid to show weakness. He was afraid of being anything less than what he was supposed to be.

He was just like you.

You wonder, is he still?

You break the silence between you once again. “Can’t sleep?” you ask.

He shakes his head and looks to the whiteness of the moon. He turns back to you when you have nothing else to say, and helps you climb onto the roof with him.

You think, as you lay next to him there, that you may still be the same. Different, changed, scarred in not so similar ways, but the same.

You don’t question it when you wake up in Paya’s bed again in the morning. You know how you got here. You know why it was you calmed enough to remember how to sleep. And you know the honeyed apples Impa offers you for breakfast didn’t come from her. You still remember Link’s cooking, after all.

It goes on like this for days. The Sheikah treat you with both respect and awe and like you are a sickly invalid. Impa nags you like someone’s mother, and you realize that she is twice over. Link is around. He’s always around. He is always close by, actually. But he leaves you alone.

He does remember proper etiquette, you realize. Or maybe it’s instinct. He is close enough to defend you, but not to eavesdrop. Prepared to die for you, but not to touch you. He is ready, what for you are not sure, though Impa takes note one day and says it’s a good thing, because surely the Yiga still want both of you dead.

You say nothing to him. At night, when you cannot sleep, you find him. He is not far away. He is never far away. He watches the fish swim in the pond by the Goddess statue. You sit next to him under the tree beside it, and sleep.

He hands an apple to the Korok by the frog shrines that only you two seem to be able to see. When the creature makes a gleeful sound at the gift, you laugh unbidden for the first time since you came to Kakariko. You fall asleep next to an empty offering bowl.

You dream of the day you left him, entrusting his barely breathing body to Purah. It was a challenge to carry him that far, but somehow, you managed. He was shorter than you, but heavier for the density of his muscle. His blood stained your prayer dress, drying brown as mud, but you didn’t care. You had a job to do. You understood your purpose, finally.

You entrusted his sword to the Deku Tree, and a message, knowing that it might mean very little to him when he wakes. You understood that you must both make sacrifices to do what must be done, and the fact that he might wake not knowing you is the embodiment of all of that. Then, the picture of your triumph was so clear, so certain. It was worth waiting for.

The next night, he holds you again, and after this third time, you will soon lose count.

Impa tells you that you should let the people know who you are, and rally them to rebuild your nation, your court. The thought makes you lose your appetite for the creamy carrot stew that Link made for all of you. Even Paya seems to understand the severity of your silence and excuses herself from dinner.

Impa insists, “It must be done.”

Link finds you this time, crying in Paya’s bed. You don’t know when you started crying. It feels shameful and silly, even more so to be caught. But Link has seen you do more shameful things than this.

Hating him, of course, was the worst thing you’ve ever done.

When he speaks to you, it’s still soft and low. He can speak. He does have his voice. Just as before, he mostly saves it for you. “We don’t have to,” is all he says.

You start to protest. Of course you have to. Of course you do. It is your kingdom, after all. It is what you worked to save. It lies in ruins and you sit here crying over the thought of ruling it.

But Link reminds you that it isn’t just you. “We don’t have to,” he said. Because it would be you and him. Him guarding you as you sat in the ruins of your father’s throne.

But he is all you have.

“We have to,” you insist.

Link shakes his head. “Not yet.”

He leaves a note for Impa in messy handwriting you can’t recall having seen before. You usually did the writing, the communicating. Tonight, he does it for you.

He does a lot for you. Has done a lot for you.

You ride on Link’s horse, clinging again to his waist, under the waning moon. He takes you up, up, into the hills. To Hateno.

You arrive in the morning and no one seems to know who you are or particularly care. A little boy runs up to Link and asks him to show him his sword. A farmer waves to him. The woman outside of the general store asks him if he needs anything. An odd young man stares at you, but then goes to Link and mumbles a thank you to him for a favor he dares not name.

Link waves them off. He responds, quiet and polite, but clearly trying to get them to leave. He guides the horse as you sit atop it. You feel funny, out of place in a time where people do not remember you, or understand what you have done for them, gleaming white in your prayer gown, unstained as the moon.

You need different clothes.

He brings you to a house you recognize. Link himself never volunteered this information, of course, but another guard pointed out that he lived there as a boy, once, before his family moved to the castle to serve there.

You wonder if he remembers.

The house is small. The house is old. Link stables the mare and you wait for him outside. He opens the door for you, but lets you go in first.

It is a simple cottage, lined with treasures untold. Mipha’s trident. Revali’s bow. Daruk’s hammer. But it’s Urbosa’s sword and shield that bring you to tears.

That, and the fact that the table is set for two.

Link holds you again and says nothing. This is where you lose count.

He lets you go after a while, and goes outside. He comes back with a simple rice bowl topped with salted meat, and you eat it at the place he’s kept for you. You don’t ask him if he remembers this house. You’re pretty sure he doesn’t. But he remembers your favorite comfort food.

You tell him you need new clothes. He nods and keeps eating.

There’s only one bed, you discover later on. But you do like the sturdy writing desk in the loft, and the framed picture you remember taking with your friends, your Champions. Only you and Link remain.

He is all you have.

You are tired from riding all night. Your body begs you to rest. Your mind knows that Link has given you an opportunity to do so that Impa would not.

Still, you protest, “I can’t take your bed.”

He shakes his head, then realizes he’s going to have to speak to get his message across, “It’s okay.”

“Where will you sleep?”

He shrugs an answer.

You think, maybe, that the place setting was not for you. You think, maybe, that Link didn’t plan for the future either. You think, maybe, that neither of you knows how to live happily ever after.

“You’re not going to take no for an answer, I see?” you half ask, half conclude.

Link nods.

The sheets smell like him. You lay down and give up. He’s never asked you for anything, and now he only asks you to rest where he knows it is quiet and safe.

You let him walk away. One step. Two. The third is unbearable.

You reach for his hand, and pull him back.

You do not name what you feel when he lays beside you, when he holds you again. This time, you do not cry, but in addition to that nameless feeling, there is a weariness and a grief that is beyond tears. You feel it in him too, in the way he breathes shaking breaths into your shoulder.

You sleep into the evening. The sun is red as the moon once was when you wake. Link is gone, but he’s close by. You can hear him humming as he cooks outside.

There are new clothes folded on the foot of the bed. You change into them. The trousers are too short for you, but otherwise fit fine. The tunic is soft, but baggy in the shoulders. When Link returns with meat skewers and fruit cake, you realize these are his pants. His clothes. His house. His food. His bed.

He is all you have.

You don’t mind it. Neither does he. He won’t tell you that, of course, but you know.

A part of you feels you should be ashamed. But you’re not.

You are too tired for that.

“Did you sleep too?” you ask Link over a bite of cake.

He nods.

“We’ll both use the bed,” you offer as your royal decree.

He nods again.

You sleep beside him for a week before you ask him to cut your hair. You don’t have anyone else to ask, and he won’t say no. He won’t ask why you feel an overwhelming need to do this.

You feel like you’re treating him like furniture again for a moment, but realize that you would never trust furniture with this.

Only Link.

He cuts your hair with the Master Sword. When you ask him why, he actually answers.

“It stays sharp,” is his reason.

He slays your hair like it’s an ancient evil. You feel cleansed and light, sitting backwards on a chair outside the house, amongst the flowers. You watch the blonde strands blow away in the wind.

“Cut it shorter,” you tell him.

He does.

Your hair is shorter than his now, and you love it.

You comb his out that evening, untangling it from a worn blue tie. It is still wild and ragged, loose over his shoulders. You put the tie in the pocket of the pants you took from him, and ask him if he has another one, as this one is well past its prime. He does, and you tie it up neatly for him again.

His heart beats you to sleep.

You wake in the morning to a letter from Impa, saying that she and Purah will visit tomorrow. The boy who delivers it to you has no idea who these people are, what they have done, what they have sacrificed. Neither does he for you and Link.

But he is nosy enough to ask, “Who is your friend, Link?”

Link looks at you to answer, sitting at his kitchen table, with your short hair and borrowed clothes.

You don’t know the answer yourself.

So just, “Zelda,” must suffice.

The youth is content with that answer, knowing not what the name means, what fate it decided for you.

Link watches you as you read the letter. He reads your face to know what it says, but you tell him anyway.

“I can tell them to go. Tell them you’re sick,” he offers, in his quiet way.

You’re the one that shakes your head this time. “No,” you add, “I’m all right. It has to be done.”

Link should nod but he doesn’t. He just looks at you and understands. He knows. You know. Both of you are used to doing the right thing, even if you do not want to.

You know now that you do not want to be Hyrule’s Queen. You want to sit in Link’s house and eat his food and brush his hair and listen to him hum. You want the children only to know you as Zelda and nothing else. You want to watch people thank Link for saving their chickens, not knowing that he’s saved them all from something far worse than a loss of poultry.

But you also know that you don’t get to have the things that you want. Not now, not always. You know, though, that you can carve out spaces for them, times and places.

You can start to rule your kingdom from Link’s bed, still, soothed to sleep by his breathing.

Purah is a child and Impa is ancient, and they are both about as old as you, even though you still look seventeen. Somehow, this makes sense. Purah hugs you with her tiny arms, but then clings to Link’s legs until he gives her a pose and a little laugh.

They bring you clothes that look like yours from before, but are newly made. All royal blue and royal seals and triforces and fine tailoring. You don’t want them, and prefer how Link’s pants stop just short of your ankles, and how his tunics are loose around your shoulders.

They have tea at the table and say nothing about the two place settings and the one bed. Link makes them risotto, Purah’s favorite. Purah plans and Impa nods along. You are as silent as Link as you drink your tea and listen to them.

“Nothing to say, Princess?” Impa asks after a while. “You’ve been with Link too long. Where are your words?”

It takes you weeks to find them.

Hateno is thriving, so far away and so little affected by the Calamity. You venture out into the fields, walk along the creeks and ponds. You watch the windmills spin. You pet a friendly cow. When anyone asks who you are, your answer is just “Zelda, a friend of Link’s” and there are no further questions. Link is trustworthy, and has proven himself thus. You are assumed to be the same.

One day, you are feeling up to the general store. Link gives you rupees, and you try not to think how strange it is to be taking money from him, or why money is where you mind draws the line when you wear his clothes, sleep in his bed, and eat his food.

But you take his rupees anyway, and you walk to the general store. You buy rice and milk, and you ask the clerk where the children go to school.

There is no school. There is no education. There is no history or science. The man at the counter tells you he taught his children to read and write and add and subtract and how to run the shop.

“That’s all they need to know,” he tells you.

“But there’s so much more,” you say.

You find your words, telling Link that the state of education in this town is unacceptable and must be corrected. You plan. You ask questions. He nods and whispers answers. Eventually, he smiles at you.

“What?” you ask him.

He shakes his head.

You keep talking, even in bed. You don’t remember falling asleep. The next morning, the contractor Link told you about is waiting for you downstairs. Link makes him tea and a fruit pie. Probably also his favorite.

You spend the day designing the village school with him, while Link is not so far away, easily being heard chopping wood, catching frogs in the pond, and making a spicy curry for lunch--his favorite, you remember. He laughs when Bolson can’t handle the spice despite best efforts, and steams a nice, mild fish for him instead.

You are proud to say you can handle Link’s spicy curry just fine. You remember the last time he made it for you, when you were going up to Mount Laynaru in your thin prayer dress. He didn’t want you to be cold.

He is all you have.

You find his hair tie in your pocket when you do laundry in the pond. You don’t know how to do laundry, but you can figure it out. Link probably knows and would do it for you if you asked him or even if you didn’t, but he’s been asked to run something up to the lab for Purah, and you wanted to try to do something for yourself. So you sit with your bar of soap and let your legs dangle in the water as you scrub.

You keep the hair tie and find another place to hide it. He knows you took it, so it seems silly, but you hide it anyway.

The children know you only as Zelda. They don’t know what a school is, but you try to explain it to them. You try to tell them it is an exciting thing, to learn, to know more.

They don’t like the prospect of sitting inside for hours on end, but their parents seem appreciative of the project.

Purah visits weekly to talk about big plans and eat a bowl of risotto. One day, she knocks at the door and is not a child anymore. Nor is she an old woman. She looks about the same as she did before the Calamity, but maybe a touch older. When you ask how she managed that, she merely says it’s too complicated to explain and talks about building towns and towers and technology and how to make Hyrule a kingdom again.

She talks about moving on. She asks where you will go next.

There are many places you will go, but you know you want to come back here. So you don’t answer her, because that’s more complicated than however she managed to manipulate her age.

You, Purah, and Link are all right around one hundred and seventeen years old, sitting around your table. You’re all too young to buy a bottle of wine, but too old. You joke to Purah that she should have added a few more years for that purpose alone. She looks at you funny when you laugh, but agrees.

She has Symin bring you a bottle of wine the next day. You don’t even want it and Link shrugs, laughing as he mutters something about Gerudo Town. You get him to tell you stories, sometimes, of things you already know. Things you watched him do. Moments where you entertained yourself with his freedom in your imprisonment.

He was all you had, after all.

Link isn’t all you have, not anymore. But when you agree to go to the ruins of Castle Town and try to plan out a restoration project with the Sheikah, the understanding that he is coming with you is unspoken and unnecessary. Of course he is.

On the way there, you catch a beautiful golden mare for yourself, with his coaching. The thrill of riding her is incomparable, even after you’ve saved the world. But you miss your arms around Link’s waist all the same. But he grins as you ride beside him, confident and sure in your ability to keep your mount steady, as he’s now taught you to be.

Robbie meets you with the others in the ruins. He likes your hair. He’s sad that the Guardians and Shrines and other tech faded away when the Calamity was defeated, apparently no longer needed now that their intended purpose was fulfilled.

Link looks to the distant mountains in the four corners of Hyrule as he says this. You look with him, finding them empty. Your friends are well and truly gone. Their purpose too, was fulfilled.

And still, you and he are left. Only the old Sheikah remember you, and apparently some of the Zora. That’s it. That’s all.

Link is upset. You know this, despite the lack of expression in his face.

That night, you were meant to sleep in separate tents the Sheikah set up for you, but you crawl into Link’s bedroll once everyone else is asleep. You lay silently with him, and know that you’re the one holding him now.

It is the least you can do. After all, you are all he has.

You go other places. Do other things. See other people. Link, as always, goes with you.

You meet the Zora. Sidon is massive now, charming and almost insistently positive. He pulls both of you into a bone-crushing hug. He goes on and on, telling you how Link saved his people, telling you things you already know, like how amazing he is.

You meet the Rito. Their lives are short and harsh and they do not know you. Even their elder does not remember. But Teba is kind and his son is adorable. You watch with the boy as Link and Teba shoot targets at the snowy Flight Range, and little Tulin tells you that one day, he hopes to be just as fierce a warrior as the two of them.

You meet the Gorons. Link makes you drink a bitter-tasting elixir made from lizards. He laughs and mutters it’s payback from making him eat a frog. But it keeps you safe from the boiling temperatures. You barely pay attention to Yunobo because you’re happy that Link remembered the frog.

You meet the Gerudo. Riju is wonderful, a young and bright shining star. She makes you miss Urbosa so much. They agree to meet you at the Oasis so Link can come along. Riju teases him about how he made it into Gerudo Town to meet her. You tease him on the ride out of the desert that he would make a lovely vai. Link bats his eyelashes at you.

He’s funny, even when he doesn’t talk.

He wasn’t very funny before. But you liked serious Link. And you like funny Link.

He shows you the Gerudo outfit when you get home to Hateno. You laugh and he laughs and he does a little dance. You try it on and he says it fits you better. You argue the opposite.

When you go to bed, you lay your head on his chest and realize that you thought of this place as home.

You were glad to be home.

You are glad it’s with him.

Link is braiding your horse’s mane for you when the mayor comes to chat. Purah told him who you are, that rat. He’s honored to have you here. He agrees to let the children still think you are just Ms. Zelda, the woman who so desperately wants to be their teacher. The school is nearly finished, after all.

But he compliments your house.

It’s Link’s house, but you don’t tell him. Because it’s your home and this is confusing. You don’t want to know the word for what you feel and don’t want to define it.

Purah left for her new town outside of the remains of your castle. Symin has been relegated to the role of teacher with you, but seems happy with the job. Anything is better than babysitting Purah, after all. Impa leaves you alone, so long as she knows that you are willing to try.

You want to pretend Link is all you have, just a little while longer.

So you don’t correct the mayor. Sure, it’s your house.

Link doesn’t object.

You love that Link is always around, but sometimes, still, you want to be alone. You want an excuse not to look at him, to study and plan and do the things you’re supposed to be doing.

You ask Bolson to build you a room in the well, so you can think.

You laugh when you find that the frogs have moved in with you.

Link knows about the well. He never goes in. He knows you do. He knows you need a place of your own. Before, it was your study in the castle. Even then, when he was assigned to guard you there, honor-bound, he stood outside the door.

You tinker with things down there. Sometimes it’s trying to replicate ancient Sheikah tech. Sometimes it’s making armor and pouches for Link. Sometimes it’s just reading while playing with his hair tie.

Most of the time, you come up because you miss him.

The first day of school is as chaotic as you thought it would be and more. Symin has the children surprise you with pictures they’ve drawn. When you get home, you show Link one where he is following you, as he always does, and how the child drew him waving, as he always does to the kids.

You talk about the kids over dinner. You talk and talk and talk, as you once did. You feel fuller than you’ve felt in a very long time, and not because of the spread of fruit cake and rice bowls and curry and your new favorite mushroom skewers that Link made for you, though that all helps.

You feel like you’re doing something. Like you’re earning the title of Princess. Not in a destined and divine way, but in a way that matters to people. In a way that they can recognize you for, when you are ready to let them, that is.

You help Link wash the dishes. You insist on helping. When the thought crosses your mind, as you lean over to him to reach for a towel, that you should kiss his cheek, you don’t hesitate. You give into it immediately.

He looks stunned only for a moment. A flush creeps into the cheek you kissed, and doubtless too into the one you can’t see. But you’re the one who broke the barrier. You granted the permission, so Link can break his decorum, or what remains of it.

He holds you again, so many times you’ve lost count, and he kisses you. You don’t talk anymore that night, as you’ve found a better use for your lips, but you still feel just as full, bursting even.

The years pass, Link keeps your hair short and you keep his from being too wild. You finally feel like wearing your own clothes. You learn to accept that most everyone knows who you are now, and that they love you for that. No one says anything about the two place settings and the one bed in what they now call your house, or how the world is calmer now and you don’t need a bodyguard, but Link is always with you. No one asks what happens in Ms. Zelda’s house, in the one bed, when two people live there. Not even Purah.

You assume Impa must think Link sleeps on the floor every night.

You don’t put a name to what you feel for him because some things don’t need names. They don’t need defining. You understand what this is and so does Link. There isn’t a word worthy of it in any language you know. Besides, Link doesn’t like words. He doesn’t need them.

And in this rare case, neither do you.

In the depths below the castle, Link listens to you talk about the Zonai. He holds the torch for you while you search for your Purah Pad to capture the images that surround you both. You can see this place puts him on edge, but your excitement mostly blinds you. This world has been so wonderful to live in again. Together, the two of you can fix this. You can do anything together.

You don’t understand what you find at the passage’s end. It all happens so quickly. The mummified corpse that knew your names. The strange hand. The crumbling ruins.

When he reaches for you, you are reminded of a fact you’ve nearly forgotten after these last few years.

Link is really all you have.

And this time, he could not reach you.

He could only watch you fall. Down, down, down. Then disappear in a flash of light.

[rice-ballin]

y'know what? heres a bunch of dumb and stupid japan headcanons because i think about him too much

(warning these MAY be a bit ooc :7)

ik he's already a hikikomori, but i feel like he's like TOO MUCH of one. I mean like borderline bedroom dwelling 2chan/4chan dwelling NEET that hasn't seen the sun in days

but also on the other hand he genuinely enjoys the outdoors like hes either INSIDE or OUTSIDE no in between

AUTISTIC!!!!!!!!!!! AUTISTIC AS FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

enjoys shit like evangelion and serial experiments lain. i kid you not hes probably on some internet thread explaining the plot of lain and how people "just dont get shinji like he does"

also likes sailor moon. his favorite sailor scounts are mercury and saturn.

unironically says he prefers 2d women over 3d women (ik thats already canon but bare with me) but like to the point that he probably has a bunch of fictional anime/video game crushes (he just likes men tho thats why he only likes "2d women")

also his gay awakening was probably link from the legend of zelda lmao

plays touhou. hes surprisingly good but isn't the best at it.

favorite fruits are strawberries, least favorite fruit are apples

has been seen going on walks at like 5 am in the morning, causing little kids to start a rumor about an evil monster that roams the streets and haunts little kids if you don't like clean your room though (kiku isn't haunting anyone fyi he just looks like shit in the morning)

partially mute, and usually goes mute in social situations. he writes on notecards to communicate when he does

owns one of those "eat, watch anime, sleep, repeat" shirts. not willingly however, as it was a gift from a friend. kiku keeps it in his closet and refuses to look at it.

does NOT like car jokes related to his name.

probably listens to weezer ngl, favorite songs would be The World Has Turned and Left Me Here and Why Bother?

treats his dog pochi almost like his kid at times, and by that i mean making it warm homecooked meals, giving it a really nice bed with blankets and pillows, hell he probably reads pochi bedtimes stories or smth. kiku just REALLY cares about his stinkin dog he'd DIE for that thing.

and lastly kiku probably owns a fuck ton of anime figures, though doesn't have a favorite one.

[gay-jesus-probably]

So like, last night I stumbled upon your discussions of why a lot of TOTK’s whole… everything is messed up, and it had me thinking about it so much I had troubled sleeping afterwards. So uh, thanks for that lol (/lh). In all seriousness, your takes on how imperialist Hyrule is in this game, how much less like unique cultures the various towns feel like, Ganondorf being both completely flat and also seemingly not meant to be, and how weird it is that Zelda is back in power really put into words a lot of thoughts that had been nagging at me as I’ve been playing. Like, the amount to which the writing has suffered from BOTW is staggering when you actually lay out the problems. Out of curiosity, do you have any idea what the fuck happened? Like did the writing team change? The game had so much potential, as seen by the numerous fan theories/AUs etc. So what went wrong?

Honestly? I have no idea. I'm not usually that big on behind the scenes stuff anyways, and I'll be real here, I went into this game pretty much 100% blind - I didn't even watch any of the trailers, I knew NOTHING about TOTK except from a few details I absorbed from hearing other people talk about online (basically, I knew Ganondorf was going to show up as a talking corpse, Link would lose an arm, and the Master Sword would get rekt).

I rarely buy games as soon as they come out anyways tbh; I can only think of three games that I've actually gone out of my way to get as soon as possible after their release, and that was the 3DS remakes of Superstar Saga and Bowsers Inside Story (two of my favourite games ever, and Superstar Saga having literally been my first RPG), and I picked up the Mario 3D All Stars collection on launch day as a favour to my older sibling (who was stuck at work), and got one for myself in the process. The only reason I bought TOTK like a week after its release was because one of our dogs was literally days away from having a puppy, and so I knew that the next few weeks of my life would be entirely dedicated to keeping the other two dogs busy, assisting mom with the newborn puppy, and just generally being on call to provide literally anything mom needed as soon as she needed it. Which meant a lot of sitting around waiting to be required, and I'd need something to do that I could easily pause at a moments notice. So... new video game seemed a good way to fill the hang time.

And it was a good call, like I said, I've been having loads of fun with this game. There's a reason I've almost got 300 hours of gameplay, and it's not (just) because I haven't had anything better to do in between taking care of dog stuff (though that number is somewhat inflated due to me leaving it open and paused for hours at a time while busy with dog stuff). It's just that the story is a fucking mess.

As for what happened with the story... I have no idea. I've seen some people suggest that they might have been planning something a little more ambitious, and then technical limitations forced them to walk it back, so the story had to be hastily reworked to match. And I've heard that the abilities in TOTK were just ideas they had for BOTW that they couldn't fit in, which honestly I can see - the abilities are cool and all, but let's be real here, they aren't nearly as distinct as the BOTW runes. Magnesis, Cryonis, Stasis and Remote Bombs were unique powers with different uses in different areas; now the powerset is just Recall, Get Around Slightly Faster, Ultrahand, Ultrahand But In Your Inventory, and Ultrahand But Faster. But I don't know if that's actually the case.

But honestly, I really don't know why the writing is so awful. To be fair, some of it is definitely just the English translation team shitting the bed - like come on, they didn't need to have Sidon and Yona repeatedly exchange the exact same line about how he's scared she'll die like Mipha. They could have at least changed the fucking wording to make it sound more natural. And I know that other translation teams managed to inject some more nuance into the story - the French translation actually managed to call Rauru on his imperialist bullshit! For the throne room scene, they had Ganon refer to Rauru with 'vous', the formal form of 'you', but Rauru refers to Ganon with 'tu', the informal form of 'you'. 'Tu' is for use in casual settings or between friends, and if someone is using 'vous' for you, referring to them with 'tu' is a MASSIVE insult; it's very condescending, and implies that you have literally no respect for that person whatsoever, but they should continue treating you as a figure of great authority. To sort of translate that into an English equivalent, it'd be like if Ganon walked into that scene using formal language and referring to Rauru as a fellow King, and Rauru responded by treating Ganon like a small, dumb child. Hugely insulting. Also the vous/tu disparity has a History with French colonialism, so that adds some implications as to what Hyrule's really doing with their 'allies'. And in the scene where Ganon takes the secret stone, the French translation has him say Rauru tried to force him to submit, which is an outright accusation of imperialism (as opposed to the English saying Rauru wanted to control Ganon, which suggests the problem was Rauru thinking he could find a peaceful solution instead of just executing a foreign leader for thought crimes)

So the english translation definitely had the room to put some more nuance into things if the team had wanted to; honestly I kind of wish I knew Japanese so I could compare it to the original script and see if any of the problems I've been bitching about were part of the script from the start, or if the English translators were just particularly bad. But Nintendo is a very conservative company, and Japan is a very conservative country with a serious nationalism problem, so I kind of doubt it, especially since the game portrays Hyrule pretty much the exact same way that Japan is portrayed in propaganda justifying their own imperialism. That... does not suggest the English team went apeshit. That suggests that the awful shit was in the script from the start, and the English team was just totally on board with it.

As for the writing teams... I mean, to be fair it's been like seven years, of course the writing team isn't the exact same as BOTW. But honestly, the main issue is just that they've recycled a lot of old problems from the Zelda games, and somehow stripped them of what little nuance they had before. Like, Ganondorf trying to take over Hyrule because Evil has been an issue since Ocarina of Time (which this game was clearly heavily pulling from), but even though OoT never told us he had a deeper motive, the worldbuilding still showed exactly why he would have such an issue with Hyrule. We knew there had been a bloody civil war only about a decade before Ganon's takeover, we knew that the Gerudo were treated with disdain by Hyrule, and we saw that Hyrule's alliances with the Gorons and Zora were pretty flimsy, and neither race felt like Hyrule actually gave a damn about them. But most importantly of all, OoT gave us the Shadow Temple, a horrific prison meant to inflict unspeakable torture on its captives... all on orders from the Hylian royal family. Hyrule's hands were never clean. We weren't supposed to side with Ganon in OoT, but we were shown a long list of reasons for why he was so pissed off.

Someone else said that TOTK feels like a retelling of OoT that's just pro-Hyrule propaganda, and that's a pretty good summary. I don't know what the fuck Nintendo was thinking, but honestly it kind of seems like they're trying to stick to the formula of Zelda games at all costs, while also making the entire game just a huge 'gotcha' to all the fans that have spent the last 25 years seeing Ganondorf as a sympathetic character with depth and reasonable motivations. I find it ironic that they decided to include the Wind Waker boomerang and shield in the game, considering that the whole game feels like an attempt to get everyone to forget Wind Waker ever happened. That's still the most human we've ever gotten to see Ganondorf - he didn't have many lines in that game, but the ones he did have mattered. At the end of the day, WW Ganondorf wanted to have a better life for his people, and he knew Hyrule would never let that happen. But now apparently Ganon just wants to dropkick puppies into woodchippers, and he doesn't give the slightest hint of a fuck about trying to wipe out the Gerudo people entirely by attacking them with an endless sandstorm plus zombie apocalypse. His only character trait is Evil.

If I want to get really cynical for a minute here, I think it's basically just a cash grab. If your game prompts a moral debate, then it can offend people, which means they won't want to give you money for it. But if it's a simple black and white conflict with no nuance, the fans will love all the right characters in the right way, and everyone will love hyrule and want to see more of it! It's like the fucking MCU; they're not willing to tell a fresh story, or make any serious commentary. They just want something safe and formulaic that has been statistically proven to make money. Fucking cowards.

[amiharana]

and even more revalink hcs from this post part 6

previous hc part 5 x i'm too lazy to tag the other ones, just go through this one 😭 i haven't done one of these in a bit so i'm doing this for funsies 😹

who's the primary protector of the two?

hard to say, since they're both warriors with protective instincts, and link had to have learned some survival skills & instincts in botw

neither of them ever rest really, constantly on their guard because they're not letting anyone get the slip on them

i imagine that maybe they bicker over who gets to protect the other, always insisting that they'll be the one to save the other 😹

who sleeps in and who is the early bird?

i think we should know by now where i stand on this 😹

i am the self-proclaimed #1 sleepy link x coddler revali enthusiast. you know damn well i am tucking that blond twunk into a soft comfy bed (the bed being revali)

who is the least patient?

hard to pin down as a generalization, because it's circumstantial between the two of them imo

like we all know link would stare into a campfire all night just to be able to hunt the best game at the exact crack of dawn

but revali is very thoughtful and methodical to me. i just reviewed his diary and the cb memory, and it's clear that his dedication to the craft warrants a lot of strategy, perseverance, and patience. he can be incredibly patient for the things that matter most to him

(i also really like the idea that revali would be very patient with fledglings 🥺 gordon ramsey type beat)

that being said, both revali and link will have a breakdown trying to assemble a single chair from ikea. they insist that the furniture is cursed but zelda assembles it in less than five minutes

which of the two listens to old music and which one is more into the newer stuff?

to me, revali seems like he would enjoy classical music, and classic pop & rock in general. anything before the 2000's, revali can get into

projecting a portion of my own music taste onto revali, he fucks with songs like 'stitches and burns' by fra lippo lippi, 'i melt with you' by modern english, and 'true' by spandau ballet. i will not be taking any criticism at this time 🙏

meanwhile link's playlist is jumping from 'good lookin'' dixon dallas to 'planet of the bass' to 'ETA' newjeans. and he finds all of it unironically genius

who's the first one to quit a new hobby because they're not great at it on the first try?

my instinct was to say revali, but the thing is, revali holds a great insecurity in wanting to be the best, and it's difficult to do that when you're dating Mr. Link Master-At-Everything-He-Tries over here

so if he's not automatically good at it but link is, you better bet your entire ass that revali is learning that shit out of spite to be better or at least just as good at it as link is

bitches can't even have like a couple hobby, everything turns into a competition if it's revali and link ✋😭

who holds a grudge the longest?

revali of course

a while ago, i made a post about how i hc'd revali to be a capricorn sun virgo rising, and i kinda still stand by that. he'll take anything to be a personal slight against him, will block you on everything, and talk shit about you to anyone. petty ahh mf

link just doesn't seem like the type to hold grudges, he's kinda goldfish brain. he'll forget he was even mad at you 15 minutes later

who secretly knows all the lyrics to the other's favorite songs but refuses to expose themselves?

revali actually 🥺

link soaks up melodies and lyrics like a sponge, so he has no problem picking any one of revali's playlists and knowing every single song on there, he will sing his heart out to each song on that damned playlist

revali is a bit of a music snob and isn't always the biggest fan of link's taste in music (as per #4 in this list LOL)

but he tries really hard to memorize link's favorites even if he fucking hates the song, which results in revali practicing korean just to be able to sing fucking 'gangnam style' psy with link 😭

who's more likely to cry about a plant dying?

link hands down. this guy gets overly attached to inanimate objects fr

bro is the type to bump into the corner of a table and be like "oops, sorry mr. table, didn't mean to hit you"

zelda once sent link a bouquet of flowers she had grown herself, and link put them in a nice little vase, made sure they got sunlight and water every day, and gave each flower names

when one of the flowers started wilting, link was about to have a whole breakdown

revali comes home to link trying to perform surgery on a flower, like why it got a whole iv drip bag now???

which of the two is the most outspoken? which of the two is quick to speak and which one is quick to listen?

these were actually two separate questions but i decided to mix them, bc i think it's pretty clear who's who

revali is more outspoken and quick to speak, he's confidently opinionated and will mansplain to you unfortunately. he's not afraid to tell you what he thinks, because he thinks he's always right. very much the type to tell you he's just being brutally honest as an excuse to a dick skjdhfkdj

link is soft-spoken, reserved, and a listener, he'll let you take the lead on the conversation or listen you out completely before saying anything.

as such, revali is the one berating the cashier for putting pickles on link's burger when he said he didn't want any 😹

and honestly? link just likes hearing revali's voice, so he's content with letting revali talk his head off as long as they get to cuddle or hold hands.

[cookie-waffle]

here are my new Zelink totk theories with added context from minor spoilers:

- The American localization is gonna cut out/change a LOT of the more explicitly romantic subtext because american parents are pretty notorious for getting super easily offended. Directly implying that Link and Zelda share a bed is probably not seen as a big deal at all in Japan, but I can def see some of the more conservative american parents having a problem with it.

- Zelda is NOT gonna have any kind of pregnancy reveal at the end. Not just for the aforementioned reason, but also because it would heavily imply that Link is assigned male and Auonuma has actually stated in an interview that he doesn’t want to 100% confirm Link as male. (it’s why we don’t see Linkle in the mainline games)

- NPCs are gonna be referencing/gossiping/teasing Link about the relationship at some points. Link may even get dialogue options stating that he’s taken or likes someone else already when he gets flirted with.

- I do not think Nintendo is likely to blatantly just say in the game that they’re an item. They’re likely gonna rely heavily on obvious subtext, even in the Japanese vers.

- If I’m wrong about the last one…. ya know, I had this VERY low on my “likely to happen” list, but, the fact that they’re sharing a bed means that them kissing in a cutscene is not off the table.

- Link is either gonna show MUCH more emotion in this game while interacting with Zelda, or, Nintendo is gonna chicken out and have him stand around like 🧍again in every single cutscene because they don’t wanna disappoint fans who don’t ship zelink. (Usually I’d sorta understand but, they REALLY wrote themselves into a corner here. If Link isn’t at least visibly comfortable with her then that’s just shit writing)

- No, they aren’t gonna bone. Nor will there be any sort of reference to sexual contact between them. But, I also think a lot of teen and adult players might just sorta automatically assume that it happens because not only are they living together domestically, but they’re also around 23-24 yrs old now. Lot of time has passed. More than enough to, ya know…. “do stuff”

- There are likely more of Zelda’s diary entries you can find that give additional context to the relationship. Maybe she has another secret one in Hyrule castle or hidden in Hateno.

- Zelda’s room in the castle might be renovated now. And if it is, it’s very likely that it’ll be built to accommodate Link as well. There may even be some very cute easter eggs in her room like in Skyward Sword.

- Paya is gonna have some shit to say in her diary FOR SURE lmaoo. Probably something like “I’m so happy for them!” *you see what look like water droplet stains on the pages*

-The two thrones in the castle may actually have some subtle implications behind it. But I’m still not super confident that we’ll see Link become king. I mean, it’s pretty obvious that it will happen. But I’m just not used to Nintendo being so on the nose about their relationship. Them sleeping in the same bed is EXTREMELY out of left field for this franchise.

- There’s gonna be a musical reference to, or perhaps even remix, of “Romance in the Air” from Skyward Sword. And you know what? I’m gonna scream and cry and fucking explode because oh my god that is so romantic.

- No, Zelda is not gonna die. This franchise practically spawns money directly into Nintendo HQ. They are not gonna kill off the character who’s bloonline ensures more Zelda games.

[kokiriofthevalley]

My silly little Ganondorf headcannons

(curing my boredom and my first post on tumblr lol anyways)

Ocarina Of Time

✷he wears gold lipstick/makeup that was commissioned by him from the other gerudo that has very specific, precise and even rare ingredients that can't be made better anywhere else in Hyrule

✷i feel like his usual outfit was made to go to Hyrule, rather than be an outfit he typically wears while in gerudo fortress and his actual outfits look similar to his people's, maybe because it's traditionally considered more feminine? And he felt like they (Hyrule) wouldn't take him seriously unless he was conforming to Hyrule's gender binary of clothes

✷I feel like he'd be really reserved at any type of function or party that's not hosted by him/any other gerudo, like an older sibling at a birthday party. But he would be civil and "involved" with others when he knows it means gaining and maintaining a reputation

✷you would not catch him DEAD doing karaoke if any hylian is there or in a 100 mile radius dear GOD but give him more than a few drinks and leave him by himself and when you come back he'd be soloing "I need a hero" in no time

Wind Waker

✷I already wonder what he did everyday for the past however long between getting out/being freed from the sacred realm and kidnapping blonde children

✷but I think he would send bokoblins and moblins to raid islands for their books, specifically history and folklore books so he could not only gather info of what's happened over how ever long he had been gone but also get at least an idea of what happened to the hero of time and/or princess Zelda afterwords

✷ I'm not even going to lie, when he kidnapped that rich girl that link has to save and she becomes poor, he definitely stole her eyeliner if she had it on her, or he at least got his monsters to raid some woman's makeup drawer

✷He would 100% duet "gotta go my own way" with the helmaroc king while drunk, he would let himself have fun and sing 'cringe' songs he's tired ok

He would do Gabriellas part let's not lie here

Twilight Princess

✷He would get into the Salty Spitoon just by walking past it on the street

✷I personally think he wrapped up the sword of the six sages because it glowed like a light saber and it gave away his location at least one time to some random ass person he then had to kill

At LEAST once thinking about it is so funny lol, you see some tall guy with a glowing stick while going to buy a bag of flour or something and now you're dead lol

✷when he's in bed and he's recalling his earlier days, he definitely cringes to himself at the fact that he got snitched on by a child who most likely can't tell you what a verb, an adjective or a hyperbole is

✷he has to take off his crown(?) when he goes to bed (and even IF he does sleep) because he tried to go to bed with it on once and woke up to his pillow absolutely torn the FUCK up, like it was just rags at that point

Tears Of The Kingdom

This one is gut feelings because I haven't played it yet because I'm broke and if anyone sees this pls don't comment spoilers 😭

✷takes VERY good care of himself/his appearance and definitely has people who work in Hyrule castle who have a crush on him (both male and female and also gender nonconforming)

✷Trained from an early age to fight, but specialized in swordplay and archery, rather than fighting with his bare fists

✷I saw from others posts that don't have spoilers that he absolutely dispises rauru. He would 100% act petty. He would subtlety deform rarus cutlery if they all have a meal together when nobody is looking. not to the point where it's obviously bent but like the handles aren't straight at all now and he knows that they can't fix it unless they completely melt the forks and knives down to reform them

✷He also definitely "discovered" a broken window or two in Hyrule castle

[witch-of-aiaia]

the zelink gaslighting is actually hysterical so in botw you can buy a house and it's an optional side quest but several things are canon in totk that requires you to have bought the house, so it's canon in totk that you bought this one house in this town. and in totk (six years later) it is INCREDIBLY obvious that zelda lives there. all her shit is there she has a study in the well in the back yard the sign at the front says zelda's house so SOME PEOPLE (shark fuckers.) were like "haha zelda KICKED HIM OUT OF HIS HOUSE. CAN YOU BELIEVE" except it is SO OBVIOUS that this isn't the case for one several of link's things are still in this house the table is set for two you can sleep in the bed which is smth you can't do in every house in the game and there are various lines from npcs implying link still lives in the town. like they are common law married you know this in fact I think this is not the first time I've told you this BUT PEOPLE WOULD DIE ON THIS HILL. THAT LINK DIDN'T LIVE THERE "oh but there’s only one bed" YEAH. THEY SHARE IT. and also that is such an absolutely insane thing to say. "yeah this really sweet girl kicked her best friend out of his house" you hate her don't you I know you do. some people would say link probably just gave it up freely but like. grasping at fucking straws. and then zelda's english va was doing interviews like "link and zelda.... have a very special bond....." so that was funny. they live together

this is beyond insane. how do people genuinely think she straight up kicked a guy out of his own house rather than admit they are common law married

[inutaffy]

ok so you confirmed that you did want me to info dump about the hateno house so i'm gonna do that sorry. SO. first of all. nintendo never confirms zelink. i need you to know this. it's strongly implied, in some games more so than others, but it's NEVER been canon. and on the one hand i think that's really neat that a "cishet" (NOT TO ME BUT YOU KNEW THAT) pairing that would fit a fairly obvious and cliche trope (princess and her knight) ISN'T canon, (that's also part of an interesting discussion on sexuality and gender in nintendo games) on the other hand. mildly annoying when i find myself invested in it. (NINTENDO. I FEEL QUEERBAITED. BY STRAIGHT PEOPLE. NINTENDO.)

so that's just as a preface, zelink is only ever implied. it's implied in breath of the wild, and it gets way more implied in tears of the kingdom and this whole thing with the house is just one part of that. moving on

in botw there's this one town, hateno, and in this town there's a house. this house is going to be torn down, but as part of a sidequest you can buy it and decorate it a bit. it gets a nice little dining table, a single twin bed (which you can sleep in btw. you can only sleep in this bed and beds at inns. you can't sleep in bed's of the npc's houses. this will be relevant later) with a nightstand with a flower on it, some armor racks, and a nice little picture of link and all his dead friends if you unlock that through the dlc

now. this house is ALSO in totk. reminder, while the sidequest was optional, if you don't buy it, it's supposed to be torn down, so we can ASSUME that in tears of the kingdom canon, link did buy the house. but here's the thing. zelda lives there now. her diary is there, there's more decor, she is absolutely squatting in this house (also not important but the town has a school now and the schoolteacher's journal mentions that the kids love her and refer to her as ms. zelda THAT'S SO FUCKING CUTE SHE'S A SCHOOLTEACHER MY BABY😭😭😭 but also that clearly means she's living there long term, if the state of the house wasn't enough evidence)

and we COULD assume that she just kicked link out, but that doesn't sound like her!!! and HERE'S WHY I THINK THEY'RE ACTUALLY SHARING THAT DUMB LITTLE TWIN BED EVERY NIGHT

a. zelda's journal mentions that link accompanies her everywhere. he's always sticking by her side, which fits him perfectly as her destiny appointed knight and also her friend and also more once i get my hands on the zelda dev team. AT THE VERY LEAST he would definitely live near her. but there are no other places link could possibly be living in this town. i haven't made it through the entire game yet so i can't say for sure that there's nowhere in the entire game that he could be living but my money is on fucking no. also every single time you talk to an npc they're like "hey link :D! where's zelda?" pretty much confirmation that you never see one without the other. they are a UNIT

b. zelda's diary mentions that she had a builder add on a secret room for privacy (there's a well in the backyard with a small study in it) WHY WOULD SHE NEED A SECRET ROOM FOR PRIVACY IF IT'S HER HOUSE AND SHE'S THE ONLY ONE LIVING THERE??????? also in her study there's link's hair tie. why is his hair tie in her house?🤨 (also conjures thought of her doing his hair <3333) ALSO in her study she has ANOTHER journal where she mentions that the fact that link sticking with her so much has manifested in wear and tear on his clothes, so she secretly had a new and improved shirt made for him and she hid it at hyrule castle. 1. gift for him!!! 2. she set up a scavenger hunt for him!!! 3. why can't she hide it at her own house????? hmmm??? HMMMM???????🤨🤨🤨 IT'S BECAUSE HE LIVES THERE I KNOW IT

c. the house has lot's of the same decorations, the flower on the nightstand, the furniture is the same, THE DINING TABLE IS SET FOR TWO, and link's picture from the dlc is still there (if you play the game with a profile that has a botw save on your switch, which i can't personally confirm because i'm playing totk on my new switch and my profile doesn't have a botw save on it because i played botw on the family switch) but anyway, link's decor. (the armor racks are gone though) AND. THE MOST DAMNING PIECE OF EVIDENCE. YOU. THE PLAYER. AS IN LINK. CAN STILL SLEEP IN THAT TWIN BED. IN THIS GAME, YOU CANNOT SLEEP IN ANY NPC BEDS. IF THAT WAS TRULY JUST ZELDA'S (AN NPC) BED THEN YOU WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO SLEEP IN IT. I REST MY CASE. ZELINK CANON BUT THEY WON'T CONFIRM IT. MR. ANOUMA COME OUTSIDE I JUST WANT TO TALK

RORI???????THEYRE NOT CANON?????????????????????????

[zeawesomebirdie]

Heyyy there, ask back ^^

🎵Do you make playlists for your fics?

🌠What are your top three most commonly used tags on AO3?

🙌What's a line or paragraph of yours that you're proud of?

[for this ask game here]

Hey hey, thanks so much for the ask!!

🎵Do you make playlists for your fics? I do!! All of my longfics have associated playlists, and actually I had a song lyric title era and some of the wips I have yet to post still have those song lyric titles lol. I actually need to make an updated playlist masterpost, but all of the ones I've made can be found on my spotify profile ^.^ Here's a few of my most recent ones!

Time Don't Matter To Me - ~1 hour, country; for a Bruce Wayne/Barry Allen Old West!AU in which Bruce is a vigilante gunman and Barry is the US Marshal out of Dodge City Bruise Your Lover (So He Remembers Once You're Gone) - ~1 hour, pop punk; for a Bruce Wayne/Dick Grayson fic I'm working on for @ful-crum in which Dick and Bruce fuck in the Cave and then Bruce ghosts Dick for two months please stay until i'm gone - ~1 hour, 2000's pop punk; for a Dick Grayson/Jason Todd fic in which they take turns playing on Jason's gameboy maybe everything that dies someday comes back - ~1 hour, 70's folk rock; for a Edward Nygma/Dick Grayson fic in which it is six times Riddler saves Robin and one time Dick saves Eddie

🌠What are your top three most commonly used tags on AO3? Selectively Mute Link (Legend of Zelda); Alternate Universe - College/University; and Established Relationship. And tbch, only two of those three is even currently accurate because I take five million years to actually post things!

🙌What's a line or paragraph of yours that you're proud of? I actually already answered this one over here, but I'm gonna answer it again because I have been SO proud of my writing lately 😌 Once again I'll give two paragraphs, one from a posted fic and one from a wip!

From but when i'm alone on the longest nights, i think of you and your fairy lights [Beedle/Link, rated T, chose not to warn]

The snow only barely slowed his racing steps to the monster, and Link made it to its side before it had time to reposition its blade.  He ducked under its stomach, dodging its hooves while striking upward with his broadsword and opening a rain of blood and innards.  The lynel turned almost clumsily now, its back legs not quite raising high enough to clear the snow while it tried to face him directly.  It swung for his head, and he ducked, swiping at its unprotected front legs and feeling the crunch of bone shattering against his blade.

And from the latest insomniac!coldflash one shot (yet another part of Stories I Tell Myself When I Can't Sleep) in which Len wakes up in the middle of the night to Barry inexplicably in his bed and does not recognize him at first because he doesn't wake up fast enough

He really needed to wake up faster, damnit. He needed to be able to make a plan, any plan to get himself away from the man, even if all he could do was hit the emergency alert on his phone to get the Flash here. What was it Barry said he was doing tonight? Something to do with Iris’s wedding, but Len couldn’t remember just what it was right now. What time was it now, would Barry even be awake? Fuck, and when had Captain Cold ever needed to rely on the Flash like this before? He only started keeping his cold gun in the living room rather than the bedroom just last week, for christ’s sake! Cisco was going to have a field day, especially if Lisa was the one to—

[lastoneout]

Sorry for the long explanation, you hit the button, but no, that's a misconception because people have piss poor reading comprehension and, I suspect for some, legit hate women and/or Zelda respectfully(there is a very weird subset of BotW/TotK fans who loathe Zelda) and are perfectly willing to mischaracterize her actions. Also, to be completely fair, some people just felt like it was their house, not Link's, and were angry that Nintendo "took" it from them and changed it and proceded to take that ire out on Zelda for some reason, and I do have to admit that the joke is a little funny in a vacuum, so some casual players weren't motivated to look deeper even if looking deeper would immediately prove this theory wrong. (Also no shade to the shippers as a whole they are lovely and I would die for them, but there were some rare but very vocal Link/Sidon fans who got real fucking mad about Nintendo ruining their gay ship and giving Zelink some validation and painted Zelda as an asshole to cope :/)

But yeah she didn't steal it, and assuming she did is an insanely bad-faith read of Zelda's character and the situation as a whole.

To start off with the basic stuff, while the house is referred to as "Zelda's" only by the NPCs in town, apparently in the original Japanese they call it "the place the princess is staying" which does not imply ownership. I also don't recall the exact wording right now but I believe in Zelda's diary she does not talk about the house like she owns it, the only place she says is her own is the added study which apparently she commissioned herself, so not even Zelda thinks of the entire home as her's, just the room built specifically for her use, and she even canonically lets Link hang out there with her as his old hair tie is in there.

And going deeper, if you actually think about the characters and their personalities and relationship dynamics and how the game conveys all that through the story and the game mechanics themselves it is VERY clear that Zelda and Link live there together because...

1) Link(and thus the player) cannot mechanically sleep in beds he does not own or is not renting, you can't just walk into any old house in town and crash in a random bed, you have to rent them at Inns and Stables, and the only beds that are free to sleep in are the ones in the new house you can build in Terry Town and the one in Link's original house where Zelda is staying. This implies both are using the bed, or at least share the house as equals.

1.2) The game def also wants you to use it's terrible house building mini game, so they try to intentionally shift focus away from the Hateno house as Link's base to the Terry Town one, and that's also why the weapons displays/decorations in the original house are gone. They want you to use the new ones and tbh the weapon displays would look dumb empty but they also can't just give the player really op weapons right away which is what most players put up in there, so they're replaced by nice photos of the landscape. And also, if you have some imagination, you can pretty quickly come to the conclusion that if Link brought Zelda there after rescuing her he might take the weapons down so as not to remind her of violence while she's trying to heal from 118 years of Trauma.

2) There is a continuous running gag in both BotW and TotK where most people just don't know who Link is at all. He has dialog options where he can outright say he's the hero of legend and show off the sword that proves it and people don't believe him because he's short and unassuming. The only people who always recognize him are close friends and Sheika(as well as the Yiga Clan who want him dead), but even the mayor of the town Link lives in doesn't know who he is. So of course the villagers don't refer to it as "Link's house" or "The place where the Hero and the Princess are staying" because they canonically don't know who tf he even is. (And again, imagination, is it going to be a big deal if the Princess and future Queen of Hyrule is living completely alone with a man she's not married to? PROBABLY.)

3) Assuming she stole the house, while yeah, again, slightly funny in a vacuum, does go completely against Zelda's characterization as a profoundly kind and selfless person who would never just presume ownership over anything. Link himself would probably give her the house without question if asked because he is characterized as completely devoted to her, but there is no world where she would ever "steal" something that rightfully belonged to anyone, least of all Link.

4) If you complete the BotW DLC you get a picture of the champions + Link and Zelda from the past, and that ends up on the nightstand in the house if you buy it. If you play TotK on the same account as the one you beat said DLC in you can transfer over certain things like your horses...and that picture. It's still up in the house after Zelda moves in, and sure she'd have no reason to take it down as it would have sentimental value to her as well, Link put it there and it isn't removed, again implying he has control over the decor.

I could go on but hopefully that's enough. Zelda did not steal Link's house, he probably invited her there because she was traumatized after being rescued and didn't really have anywhere to go that people wouldn't be paying insane amounts of attention to her, and after things calmed down they continued sharing the home while the town had amnesia about Link's existence and neither he or Zelda corrected them because who cares and also potential scandal. People just love taking a joke seriously and refusing to give female characters even the smallest benefit of the doubt before assuming they are selfish monsters for something they straight up did not do.

Sorry again for the rant also I just care about this a lot T-T I know Zelda isn't real but like come on. Fandom has got to stop doing a misogyny all the time.

Finally, Zelda can actually pull off what the people who weren't paying attention pretend she did in TotK. Shoutout to Eiji Aonuma for supporting women's wrongs <3

[twink-between-worlds]

splitting, barely fitting; show a smile, we’re rather bored, nothing lines up anymore!

hihi so this is. longer. so i cut the chapter in half. yea :] ima go sleep now

relationships: shadow/vio, red/blue, blue & red & vio & green, mentioned past green/vio

ao3 link; x

“So, let me get this straight..”Red paused, her eyes still fixed onto Vio’s face. “You’ve been living in the fire temple since Shadow’s death—a death you claim was your fault—and had an accident which resulted in you losing your hand last week. Oh, and let’s not talk about your unhealthy eating habits during that time. Is that right?” Vio winced, sheepishly nodding. “That…is correct, yes.” “Okay,”Red took a breath, shutting her eyes before they snapped back open. “Why in the world didn’t you contact us?” “Um…well, for a while, I assumed you all still hated my guts, so there’s that.”Vio stated simply, playing with the cloth on the table. “I thought you all…wished that you’d never see me again.” “Oh, Vio—we looked for you for months..”Red frowned gently. “We didn’t even want to stop but we had to.” “...yeah. Green mentioned that.”Vio sighed, glancing up at Red. “I’m sorry.” “You disappear on us, for a long time, let us believe you’re dead, lose a hand, and you say you’re sorry?”Red deadpanned, clearly unimpressed. “...yes?”Vio winced, a nervous grin on their face. The response was met by three sighs from their companions. “..was…that the wrong answer?” “Yes, you idiot. What happened to you being smart?” “I’m still smarter than you lot.” “That isn’t exactly a challenge.”Blue shrugged loosely. “We’re fucking dumbasses.” “I’ll drink to that.”Vio laughed softly. “So…um. Should we head home?”Red smiled. Blue nodded slightly, glancing at Green. “Are you coming with, or going back to the castle?” “I probably need to tell Zelda that Vio isn’t actually dead.” “Oh, yeah, I forgot you all thought I was dead.” A beat of silence before, “Vio, we were talking about it less than five minutes ago.” “Oh, really?” “Yeah.” “..oh.” Red frowned, then shook her head and stood up, blowing the candles out. “Well, let’s go! Greenie, are you fine with Vivi using your bed til we get one for them?” “I never use it anyways.”Green shrugged as he got up. “Hey, make sure Vio bandages that up.” “We know what to do, Green.”Blue deadpanned, locking the bakery door behind them as the four of them stepped outside. “By ‘make sure’, I mean force the fucker.”Green clarified bluntly, and Blue nodded along. “Ah, got it.” Red sighed gently, grabbing Vio’s hand and walking ahead of the other two. “It’s nice to have you back, Vivi. We’ve got a lot to catch up on.”She smiled, to which Vio faintly returned the gesture. “Hey, Red, um…”Vio began, trailing off as they struggled to find words. “I have a question.” “And I probably have an answer!”Red laughed, swinging their arms. “Why…why do you care that I’m not dead? You’ve done well for yourself…all I did was cause problems. I’ll probably just make more problems for people to hate me for, anyways. Why not just let me go back to the fire temple?” “O..kay, so, that was more than one question. However! I have your answers. We care because we love you, you’re our friend. The fire temple isn’t a good place to live in, Vivi, you could get sick or worse! Plus, we want you here with us.” “Oh.” “Oh?” “...I didn’t expect that,”Vio admitted, shrugging loosely. “I mean—I obviously know the fire temple was a terrible decision for a place to stay for an extended period of time, but…I didn’t expect you guys to want me here. After all I’ve done..” “Well…we all do dumb things when we like someone.”Red whistled lowly, giggling when Vio’s face lit up. “Did you think we didn’t know?” “Know what?”Vio coughed, looking away nervously. “You liked Shadow. Maybe you still do…but we did notice it. He seemed to like you back, too!” “I sure hope so.”Vio muttered under their breath. “Um…thanks for not…acting like I’m insane. I’m sure everyone else would if they knew.” “People thought me and Blue were weird too, everyone was convinced we were all siblings.” “We aren’t even related, though?” “Yeah, people seem to struggle with that. Anyways! We’d never act like you’re insane.” “It wouldn’t really be acting anyways.”Blue piped up, grinning when Vio laughed at the comment. “You think I’m insane?” “No,”Blue paused, humming. “I know you are.” “Blue—”Red huffed, but fell quiet when Vio continued to laugh. She missed seeing Vio, and seeing them smile is nice. “Because Vio is laughing, I won’t get mad at you for that.”Red sighed. Vio smiled faintly, letting out a breath once they’d calmed down. “Well, you are talking to the idiot who cut their own hand off.”Vio mumbled, wincing when Red and Blue both froze up. “That's how you lost it?!” “...oops, did I not say that originally?” “No, Vi, you said there was an accident. Not that you cut it off yourself.”Blue deadpanned. “What the fuck?” “Oh. I thought I’d said it was myself…my bad, then.”Vio laughed, shrugging. “I cut it off myself, in a poor attempt to revive Shadow. I had read that, to bring someone back from the dead, a part of my body would aid in it. Maybe I did it wrong..” “Hold on—you do necromancy now too?”Red frowned, staring at Vio. “I…yes, I’ve been practising it for a while now.”Vio paused. “Is…is that weird?” “A little, yeah.” “Oh. Okay.”Vio hummed, heading into the house after Red and Blue unlocked the door and went in. “I can make you a new hand, if you want.”Blue glanced at Vio, wincing when Red pinched his cheek. “You won’t be doing anything until your wrist is healed!” “Well no shit, Red.”Blue rolled his eyes, sighing. “When I can get back to work, I’ll make it. You might have to come to the shop with me, though, so I can make it right.” “Oh, okay..”Vio nodded, glancing around the home. It’s relatively small, but it’s not claustrophobic. It’s actually a comfortable kind of small. …if that makes any sense. The walls are a standard beige, and the floorboards are dark oak, but there’s a few rugs scattered around. The rugs were all in all four of their colours—the purple ones were no doubt gifts from Zelda, as purple is very expensive and only nobles and royals even had permission to purchase such a colour—and they were in various different shapes and sizes. “Green said you can take his bed, but…are you comfortable with that?” Vio paused, eyes trailing to Blue and they winced once they saw Blue’s knowing look. “You knew.” “I’m not a complete idiot, Vi.” “Are you sure about that?”Vio grinned, poking Blue’s side teasingly. “Ay—” Vio snorted softly, then sighed. “To answer your question, I’m comfortable with it.” “You sure?” “Mhm! I’m sure.” Red blinked, grabbing the med kit as she made Vio sit on the couch. “Do you two know something I don’t?” “How could you not know? I know you’re not the sharpest blade in the shop, but c’mon Red.”Blue sighed, shaking his head. “Vio and Green had a thing before Vio’s fake-betrayal.” “Oh…”Red blinked, then gasped. “Oh!! That makes so much sense now!” “It’s why Green was so—”Blue paused, glancing at Red. “Permission to swear?” “...hesitantly granted.” “Thanks. It’s why Green was so pissed when he saw Vio with Shadow.” “He did seem a little mad.” “A little? He was more than a little mad. He chose the violence route.” “Ha. Violence.”Vio grinned, their grin widening when Red laughed and Blue cracked a smile. “You’re fucking weird,” “And I embrace it.” Red giggled softly, carefully bandaging Vio’s wrist up. “It’s good to have you back. It’s tough having the braincell, can you take it back now?”She pouted, and Vio nodded. “Of course. Thank you for keeping it away from dumb and dumber.” Red stood back up when she’d finished her work, pulling Vio up. “C’mon! Um, if you don’t like the fact the covers are green, we have some blankets you can put over it. They’re white, but better than nothing! We’ll probably have to ask Zellie for purple themed things, but she loves us so she’d agree.” Vio nodded along, following her into the bedroom. The house is a one-bedroom house, so the beds are in the same room, but Vio doesn’t mind. In the far corner is a single bed with mint green sheets and sage green covers. It looks untouched. On the other side of the room is a double bed with red and blue patterned covers, along with a simple white bed sheet. “Yeah we’re…looking to get a bigger house. Even more reason to now that we’re all together again, right?”Red smiled. “Where does Green sleep if not here?”Vio mumbled, an eyebrow slightly raised. “Oh! In the castle.” “His job requires it,”Blue added with a loose shrug. “He’s never here long enough.” “Ah.”Vio nodded, sitting down on the bed quietly. They haven’t been in a real bed for so long…they forgot how comfortable they are. If it could, their back would be thanking them for finally sleeping in a bed. “Vio, why do you look like you’ve never been on a mattress before?”Blue snorted, snapping the other out of their daze. “I..uh. Well, there wasn’t,,,exactly a bed in the fire temple—well, there was, but it was Shadow’s and it felt wrong for me to sleep in his bed—and, well, basically, I haven’t really been in a bed or on a mattress for months.” “Oh, that’s so sad.”Red pouted, rushing over and pulling Vio into a hug. “Why didn’t you take the bed? I know Shadow was…important to you, but he wouldn’t have minded.” “I know he wouldn’t have, it's just…he’s gone, Red. It felt wrong, especially because of what I did to him..” “You did what you had to. And Shadow chose to do what he did, that isn’t on you.” “...it feels like it is. I should’ve—maybe I could have convinced him to work with us, in a way that didn’t involve me abandoning you three..” “Oh, Vio…” “He liked drawing. Maybe if I’d convinced him, he coulda been a professional. He was good enough to be.” “He liked drawing?”Blue hummed, subtly asking Vio to elaborate. Vio nodded and quietly grabbed Shadow’s sketchbook from their bag, opening it once Red and Blue sat on the bed on both sides of them. “He did it in the little free time we got. He uh…had a preference.”Vio mumbled, embarrassed as they flipped the pages, encountering a few drawings of the violet hero pretty quickly. Quite a lot of them were drawn when Vio was asleep—looking peaceful, which is the rarest state for Vio to be in—but there were the odd few drawn when Vio was awake. The one they were looking at right now…Vio loves it, in a weird way. It was from one of their dates—one Vio chose, which also means there was no arson involved—and it appeared to have been drawn when Vio was talking about something. Their head was tilted back, seemingly staring up at something. Now, the drawing wasn’t coloured, but Shadow can make something really detailed only using various blacks, greys and whites. Somehow, Shadow had made Vio’s eyes seem to shine, and he seemed to be observant, if the small details were anything to go by. Vio was smiling in the drawing, and Shadow had remembered to add their dimple, along with freckles scattered across the hylians face. If you looked close enough, he’d even caught Vio��s slightly crooked teeth. They’re not really an obvious thing—you have to really look to see it—but also Shadow did have his tongue in their mouth a lot so maybe he felt that they weren’t straight. Vio let out a breathy laugh, thumb tracing over the little heart in the corner. They had a lot of time these past few months, and they’d looked at this sketchbook many times. The hearts were only on pages with Vio drawn on them. It was sweet, really. …Shadow loved them. He—He said it once, but Vio hadn’t wanted to believe it, knowing what they had to do. So they told him to shut up. They told him not to say it, and Shadow listened. Vio wishes they could hear it again. Just one more time. “Vivi?”Red frowned, shaking the other slightly. “Are you okay? You zoned out…” “Oh.”Vio frowned, then shrugged. “Got lost thinkin. He’s a great artist, ain’t he?” “He was, yeah.”Blue hummed. “It’s super detailed. Shit, Vi, he noticed your teeth.” “You notice it too?”Vio winced, glancing at Blue, who quickly shook his head. “No, Vi. It’s not obvious, promise.”He reassured, continuing when Vio seemed less anxious. “All four of us have slightly crooked teeth, Vi. Link had ‘em.” “Really..? I never noticed.”Red blinked, tilting her head. “Yeah. All of us have it, but nobody usually notices. The fact Shadow did…” “He liked looking at me.”Vio mumbled quietly with a soft sigh. “It was one of his favourite things. He’d let me talk and just—watch me. Not enough to be creepy or uncomfortable, but enough that he noticed little things about me. Fuck, he noticed a lot—did you know my left ear is shorter than my right ear?” “Is it?”The two blinked, clearly surprised by this. “I didn’t…know that.” “I didn’t either! Shadow was the one who pointed it out to me. He noticed my ears, my dimple, my teeth…he noticed everything except the fact I was lying to him.” “Well it’s…it’s good he didn’t notice that, right?” A silence. “My plan failed anyways,”Vio shrugged. “Guess I forgot he knows my sleep pattern and that he’s clingy.” “Um…Vivi? You keep…talking about Shadow like he’s still here, I think…” “You should get some rest, maybe? You’ve had one hell of a night.” Vio sighed, nodding and placing the sketchbook on a shelf, slipping into Green’s—their?—bed as Red and Blue headed over to their own. “Hey Vi?” “Mhm?” “It’s good to have you back.” Vio cracked a smile, staring up at the ceiling as they waited for sleep to take them.

[merci-bitch]

I’ll Never Love Again

Zelda Spellman x fem!reader

Warning(s): angsty af

Words: 2k

A/N: This is sad as fuck. I started crying myself lmao. I hope you like it, although I can’t make links. Idk how sadly. Feel free to request anything !

The sound; as if fingertips were pressing against the white keys of a piano filled the air. The sound fitting perfectly with the small raindrops falling from the sky. The sound gave of a peaceful solution. A peaceful moment. A moment that was broken into pieces.

"Y/N!"

Zelda Spellman.

You turned to look at her, her face boiling with anger. You'd left the dinner table only a moment ago. The evening started out like any other evening with your family. Sitting next to Zelda, your lover. The woman who owned your heart, the one you'd die for. Sitting across Ambrose, on your left was Hilda and on Zelda's right; Sabrina.

You couldn't explain what had happened. How you'd gotten in on the subject. It started out as a joke. Finding yourself amused at it, joking around of Zelda and Mambo Marie's relationship. How they'd gotten awfully close. You hadn't meant it, but then you saw the terror in Zelda's eyes. You knew something wasn't right. It wasn't because she didn't like the joke, of course she didn't, but she was hiding something from you. Something you just clarified. You couldn't believe it, so you left.

Zelda walked up to you. Stopping a few feet away, thinking over what to say. She had plenty to say, she just didn't know where to start. However, you came first.

"Wish I could, could have said goodbye. I would've said what I wanted to, maybe even cried a few."

Zelda's eyebrows knitted themselves in confusion as she watched you speak. Looking up at the sky again.

"If I knew that it would have been the last time. I would have broke my heart in two. Trying to stay without you."

Sighing softly. Eyes stinging. Body shaking, cold and wet. Anxious. You looked over at her. Wanting to drop to your knees, beg for her. Beg for her to never leave you, but you couldn't and wouldn't.

"I don't wanna feel another touch. Don't wanna start another fire. I don't wanna know another kiss. No other name falling off my lips."

Turning to face Zelda completely. Looking deeply into her crystal eyes. Her whole body was stiff, she didn't know how to respond to any of this.

"I don't wanna give my heart away, to another stranger. I couldn't let another day begin, or even let the sunlight in if I did. I'll never love again, Zelda."

Upon hearing those words, she shut down. The rain started to pour heavier, much harder.

"When we first meet all those years back. I never thought that I would fall for you. I never thought that I find myself, lying in your arms."

Zelda never meant to fall for you either, she despised you. Couldn't stand you. Everything you did annoyed her, yet; you became the love of her life.

"And I wanna pretend that it's not true, that you're gone, that we're gone. My world keeps turning, turning and turning and I'm not moving on."

Turning around, looking over the Spellman property, your home. The home you'd had for years, decades. Was it really home after all? Was it really where you would spend your days in the sun and storm?

"I don't wanna feel another touch, like you've done. I don't wanna start another fire, like you've done. I don't want another name falling off my lips, like you've called for Marie."

You didn't look at Zelda, but she heard the crack in your voice. The way your tone would break each time you mentioned what she'd done. There wasn't any use in trying to explain she hadn't. She hadn't meant to, but you wouldn't believe it. She wouldn't have if it was the other way around. Stubborn as she is, she doesn't know how to handle love.

You turned around as you started talking again. Nearly bursting into tears, keeping your tone harsh but near a breaking point.

"Look, I don't wanna know this feeling unless it's you and me. I don't wanna waste a moment of my life. I don't wanna give somebody else the better part of me. I'd rather wait for you all my life."

Zelda heard that strange thunder. That strange thunder passing by. She knew that no one was gonna come save her, if you wouldn't. No one would. She'd taken your love for granted. She'd taken everything for granted and gained in power. Marrying Faustus should have been her stop sign, but she keep going. Going higher and higher up in levels. Forgetting you on the way. Her lover, her person, her future. The one she'd given her heart to. Beneath the strange thunder. She was all that was causing the storm.

"I don't wanna feel another touch, or start another fire. I don't wanna know another kiss. Zelds, unless it's on your lips."

She felt eyes, eyes in the back of her head. She wanted to run, hide and cry. Her body was betraying her, she couldn't move a single finger. Her body was stuck, she wondered if Hilda had cast a spell for her to stay still, knowing her sister. She probably had, or it was just her.

"Say something. Anything."

She couldn't. What was she supposed to say? No one would hear her please, her apologies. No one would take her.

"I should have known, all of this."

Zelda cleared her throat. Finding it very dry.

"Known what."

It came out harsher then she'd intended.

"I won't ask it of you. I can't do that to you. You've taken my heart and thrown it away."

"I most certainly have not. I have it right next to mine."

"Then why take another in store? Why not just keep mine? If we were doing badly, why didn't you say anything. If you wanted me to leave, I would have done it without question if that's what you wanted."

Zelda felt herself boil, but for a different reason then anger. She was hurt, although she had no right to be hurt. But she was hurt, she was hurt by herself. She hurt you and everyone else she ever cared about. There's a reason she didn't date, she didn't have time. She never had. There's wasn't time for you, although there was at the same time. She always had time for you. She doesn't know where it went wrong.

"I don't want you to leave! Can't you understand that?!"

"You have a funny way of showing it. If you have this fire with Marie, then give it fuel."

Zelda moved forward. Grabbing your hand. Squeezing. Fighting back her own forbidden tears. She couldn't cry, she wasn't allowed to. Looking into your eyes. Losing herself, she always did. It was her space and freedom.

Your hand came up to her cheek, stroking it softly. Zelda's eyes fluttered closed for a moment. Feeling your touch gone as soon as it appeared. Stopping herself from seeking out your touch.

“I don’t wanna feel another touch, or start another fire.”

It pained her. Hearing your voice break. She knew this wouldn’t end well. It wouldn’t turn back to happy family. She couldn’t lose you, but she already did that moment. Cupping your cheeks in her hands, leaning her forehead against yours. She wanted to beg for your apology.

Zelda Phiona Spellman would never beg for anyone. She wouldn’t bow down for just anyone. But for you? She would, but she couldn’t ask for forgiveness. She knew If she did, you would forgive her but it wouldn’t return to the way it was before. Feeling her own cheeks become hot with tears, hearing your quiet sobs. She’d broken her own heart.

“I’ll never love again.”

-

“Zelda? Look who’s here to see you.”

Hilda said as softly as she could. Moving away from the bed, wrapping her arm around Sabrina. Letting you come through.

“Zelda? I’m right here, right beside you.”

Zelda opened her eyes slowly, it was hard. There you were. The love of her life. She never thought she would see your smile again. Your eyes, your everything. You grabbed her hand, giving it a soft squeeze and a kiss.

“You can go to sleep now, Zelds. I’ll be watching over you.”

Zelda trusted your words and did. Her heart ached for all those years she’d missed with you. You were here now, that was all that mattered. She would see you on the other side.

“I’ll never love again.”

[scrawnytreedemon]

Can’t sleep, mind going precisely 56 miles an hour, so I think I’ll finally get around to writing this.

Couples days back, I went ahead and finally psyched myself up to do the Zant bossfight.

Because I’d picked up where I’d left off yesterday, which was just before the boss room, obviously I was taken back to the beginning of the area. This gave the whole ordeal a trek, if a short one, what with the Palace of Twilight’s laughable length, and me more time to think.

I didn’t want to do this.

It sounds stupid, but I really didn’t want to do this. I’d cried the day before trying to psych myself up and failing, and I’d cried then, before the boss door, stalling by sweeping away the crystal-fog as best I could-- A meagre attempt at housekeeping, and a futile one. Of course I couldn’t. This isn’t that sort of game. This isn’t a game for failed attempts at kindness, at least trying to clean this awful, awful place for an awful, awful man going through awful, awful things. I was supposed to be a hero.

Heroes don’t make beds.

They don’t wash dishes, or hang laundry, or hold a rival’s hand,

They kill.

The trek didn’t stop past the door, either.

We still had to walk up the stairs. To the throne.

To him.

And I was there, laugh-crying, wishing I didn’t have to. That I could skip this pathetic ordeal.

I tried to turn around and leave.

Despite it only looking like a larger one of the many, many doors we’ve passed through this awful, nonsensical, poorly-designed excuse for a palace that no one could ever live in, it didn’t budge. There wasn’t any turning back. I had to go forward, because this is an action game, and violence is key.

The game takes the reigns. Link walks up to the throne, sword drawn, despite my deliberate decision to sheathe it. The narrative begins again. Midna sneers, and throws a taunt at him.

Zant sits, and smiles. Smiles like he thinks he still has some form of control, or knows full well he’s lost it.

You know, when I was working through the Palace of Twilight, I’d come to the realisation that... Zant locked himself in the throneroom. From the outside. Logistically, despite the good laugh I had over this guy locking himself in from the fucking outside, where his opponents can grab the key, he could get out easily-- teleportation and all. But even that aside, it still spoke to a level of hasty panic, that he would even keep the key outside, behind a waterfall of yet more shitty fog-crytals in the hopes that would deter them. Deter us.

How long had the guy been here, alone in that room?

We all know what happens next. Despite this being my first playthrough, I’ve probably seen this cutscene a dozen times. Zant has what amounts to an overly-dramatised autistic meltdown expositing himself and his motivations. That he was upset and felt like everything he’d worked for had been taken away from him. That he was angry, angry and fed up of being relegated to a half-existence. Midna retorts, Zant wails some more.

What gets me is that, when Ganondorf visits him, engulfs him in this flaming ball of fucked-magical-fuckery, he just. Stares. He doesn’t say anything, doesn’t do anything. Ganondorf speaks as though he’s already decided that, yes, you will do, we will make a pact and rule Everything together; I will live on through you.

Did Zant even agree to this?

I think, subconsciously or not, he accepted it, but it begs the question of whether or not Zant was capable enough to partake in it.

Whatever the answer, he’s clearly not capable enough to partake in this. This fight.

It’s laughable, that I’m expected to find victory in this.

The fight was a fucking slog, 90% of the time. Some of these boss-battles I hadn’t played in nearly two years thanks to the impromptu hiatuses I’m so fond of taking, so I didn’t know what the fuck I was meant to be doing half the time-- And when I did, it lagged to shit everytime this poor bastard fired projectiles, because I was playing on the gamepad, because why on earth would I play this on the goddamn TV? It was a sad, pitiful encounter that I had to laugh my way through and also mumble “what the fuck“ on several occasions because I guess somebody at Nintendo ate cheese before bed and the dev team were so desperate to patch something together for this guy’s sudden crisis that they threw it in-- I’m obviously having a good laugh, but What The Fuck.

I knock the guy down in the last phase of the battle, the only one where he isn’t mimicking something else and dizzies himself spinning like a hyperactive child, and the game takes the reigns again. Midna prepares her hair. I look away-- I’ve seen it before, many times before, and it’s cartoonishly grotesque for a game that relies heavily on somber semi-realism. Midna has her own crisis-- And yeah, yeah bossbabe, I feel it.

It cuts back, and there’s a Heart Container on the guy’s throne.

I.

I killed a guy, and now I’m collecting his lifeforce. I stormed into the bunged-up attempt of a fortress conjured up as a last defense by a man who’s fallen head-first into insanity, tore through any meagre security measure like butter, murder the guy when he’s having an episode, he dies a fucked up death, and then I collect his lifeforce.

Is that fucked up or what?

For all of Zelda’s endless violence, rarely do you actually kill “people.“ It’s the kind of stuff reserved for the end, for Ganondorf, or some other corrupted nigh-demigod on the brink of losing their humanity, or never having possessed it.

We kill Zant.

Zant barely puts up a fight, and we kill him. Zant gets summoned from the netherworld by Ganondorf in Hyrule Warriors; we put him there in the first place.

If we were to view this from a literal, like this shit actually happened and these characters are to be held accountable standpoint, then what we did was justified-- If not wholly, then mostly. Zant got power-hungry, committed what amounts to a bio-terroristic coup on the government, disfigured his rival, a woman notorious for her beauty, then proceeded to attempt the same thing with Hyrule, leading to the indirect death of at least the people who got transfigured into Shadow-Beasts in Kakariko, and attacks you first, then yeah, no biggie?

But I’ll be fucking real with you chief, I don’t find it... I don’t know, persuasive? Effective? Compelling, would be the best word, to think of it that way?

What Zant is, is a narrative tool. One that was set up to be this big, bad interloper who you need to Take Down and Save Everything, as per usual Zelda format. The justification for why we should hate him, if I’m going to be honest, feels contrived, most of the time. He does some bad thing off-screen, Midna gets pissed, Midna and everyone within a 12-mile radius explains why we should be pissed in a way that often feels borderline developer-hand-y-- And that’s. Well that’s how Zelda usually is.

It’s justification to commit violence.

--To be clear, I don’t say this in a political sense. I mean it in the very literal “hit/kill a guy“ sense. And in all honesty, that’s kinda inherent to the ethos of action games. We enjoy catharsis-- We enjoy taking down big things, it’s satisfying! I’ve played a little Hyrule Warriors-- Loved the feel of it. Violence is inherent to even the most benign of action games, and it is what it is.

Where it falls short for me, is that with Zant, I don’t feel like I’m taking down some great foe that I should justifiably hate.

I feel like I’m a clearly more equipped person breaking into a room, and bludgeoning a mentally ill person.

I’m autistic. I may slot in easier to NT society than most, but I am autistic, and it makes me deeply uncomfortable to see something I’ve fucking gone through be used carelessly as flavour for a prelude to violence. I have meltdowns. They’re relatively rare, and mostly in my room, alone, but I’ve also experienced one out in public. It was only sobbing, but there’s a special kind of horror, of humilation in knowing other people, strangers, family, what have you, are seeing it, and all you can think is how much you failed.

I can’t fully articulate why I cried so much during this, quite frankly, menial ordeal. I’m half-embarrassed to even talk about it-- Because then that means caring too much, and I can’t care too much over a poorly-justified character that wasn’t even intended to be sympathised with and that most of the fandom laughs at. And I can’t say I blame them.

I guess at the end of the day it comes down to the ever-present pity; some strange, childish commiseration I’d indulged in ever since I was six and cooing over Bowser and how awful everything was for him, that despite my continuous efforts, I can’t ever seem to explain.

I didn’t like the Zant fight. It felt empty,

And all did was sweep cobwebs and try to turn back.