#i think turkeys deserve to eat us instead

[sleep-nurse]

Btw i hate thanksgiving fuck thanksgiving

Sincerely from a pet turkey owner

[migotte]

If you're currently struggling with an ED and you're looking for a tasty, low calorie, quick and easy meal that will fill you up, I'm here for you <3

My mom cooked way too much rice for yesterday's lunch and there was a bunch of it left in the fridge, so I wanted to cook something with it in order not to waste it. Let me present you my low calorie curry recipe. It's suitable for everyone, no matter if you're vegeterian or vegan, because: -It has a bit of vegetables in it (and veggies are both delicious and great for you) -Meat is totally optional, you don't have to use it if you don't want to -You don't need any milk or coconut cream to prepare it, we will be using water instead

ingredients:

water(I used about 200ml I think but you can use more/less)

70g of cooked rice - 84kcal

10g of white onion - 10kcal

20g of peeled carrot - 7kcal

1 small turkey sausage(optional) - came out to 46kcal for me

1tsp of flour - 28kcal for me

curry powder(as much as you like, depends on how spicy you want it to be)

a dash of garlic powder(optional)

salt and pepper to taste

Total: 168kcal

Heat up a pan (don't pour any oil on it) and throw in your meat and your vegetables and try for only about 1 or 2 minutes. Then add water and seasonings and stir everything until fully combined. Cook for a few minutes until the vegetables get more soft. In order to thick up the curry, mix your flour with just a little bit of water (the mixture shouldn't be too runny or too doughy) and pour it in. Cook for a few more minutes and you're done! You can serve it with rice or just eat it on it's own!!

(Just a reminder that you DO deserve to eat, you NEED to eat to survive and function properly, you are beautiful just the way you are and you don't need to change anything about you and your body <3 I know how dangerous eating disorders are and how they can ruin your body. I know how hard recovery can be, so please don't force yourself and take it one step at a time. Eating disorders are NOTHING to brag about and I'm not romantizing them in any way. I'm just posting simple recipes while learning how to cook. Please stay safe <333)

[lorifragolina]

All I want for Christmas

A little Harringrove present for Christmas, for all my friends here and for the lovely Billy and Steve <3 !

Pairing: Steve/Billy Rating: T No warning, Christmas fluff!

Read it in AO3

Steve opened the door with a bag of diner leftovers in a hand.

Billy got up from the sofa while Steve smelled the air, delighted.

“I made some eggnog for tomorrow morning”, said Billy in a plain tone, shrugging, as he’s trying to justify the smell of nutmeg and cinnamon in the kitchen. Steve smiled, following Billy in the tiny living room, where the blonde turned on a little Christmas tree on the counter.

“What’s this?” Asked Steve, enjoying the feeble flicking lights.

Billy shrugged again. “They gave it to me at work. It was broken but I fixed it”.

“It’s lovely”, smiled Steve, kissing his boyfriend on the forehead. Billy nodded, a little uncertain. 

Steve unwrapped the food he got at the diner, still warm, and placed the table. He took a couple of good beers at work and he bought some red paper plates and napkins to give the table a bit of a festive look. Billy lit a little candle and placed it on the table, sitting down to eat.

Steve put the food on a plate, throwing away the foil boxes, and served Billy and himself a generous portion of mashed potatoes and gravy. They had roasted turkey, honey-glazed ham, vegetables and some sauces. The dessert was still in the bag.

Steve took a sip of his beer and smiled warmly to Billy, who was eating with a serious look on his face. He saw Steve’s smile and bit his lips, lowering his eyes.

“I wish I could give you more than this… this”, he sighed with a broken voice.

They both decided to work the Christmas' Eve shift, because nobody wanted to work it and they paid more for the overtime. They are still a little bit weary because of the move, and obviously they didn’t want to return to Hawkins that year. So Billy worked at the club until closure and Steve served the last shift at the diner, getting the Christmas dinner leftover in return. They decided not to waste money in decoration so the little fixed tree was the only accent in their little apartment.

“I wish I could give you more than this”, Billy fiddling in his potatoes with the fork.

Steve grabbed his hand on the table and smiled. “It’s just perfect, baby”, he said in the sweetest way he could.

Billy shook his head. He could imagine the lavish Christmases Steve had at his home, in his big house, with lights, trees, presents and fresh food. He knew Steve was there only for him, and even if they weren’t completely broken, they had to be careful with the expenses; Steve’s parents had momentarily cut money and he couldn’t still use his own until 21; they worked and had decent salaries, but the move let them bleeding a little, and besides… apart of money, Billy still wasn’t sure Steve didn’t repent, in general.

“No…” he whispered. “You deserve more, and I can’t…”

“Oh, stop it. It’s just perfect, believe me”, he repeated, grabbing Billy’s hand more strongly. He liked the light the candle was throwing on his golden complexion. 

He didn’t miss his Christmases in Indiana. Yes, he was working instead of drinking and playing with his friends, and the weather was still warm, but he didn’t miss the snow and the cold at all. He loved the gentle sea wind and enjoyed the beaches even in December, and he wouldn't change anything in the world by curling in the night with his boyfriend, there or in wherever in the world.

He didn’t miss the bright Christmas in his house, not at all. 

Billy shook his head again. “I would give you what you used to have, but I can’t… I’m sorry”.

“Are you kidding me, Billy? I don’t want anything but this!”, he waved at the table, smiling, waving with his fork.

“Come on, don’t be silly…”, murmured Billy again. 

“No, you don’t be silly. Could you really think I would change being here with you with anything else? No”, Steve stopped Billy’s objection. “You know what? This is the first Christmas I spent with… with someone who really wants to spend it with me”, he sighed a little, lowering his eyes, suddenly sad.

“Baby…”, muttered Billy.

Steve nodded. It was true, he normally spent the holidays in a big, warm, decorated house, with a lot of food and drink, but he never felt that his parents really enjoyed being with him. He always felt they barely bore each other's presence, his father always on the phone for business and his mother bored and waiting to return to some warmer place she enjoyed more, and Steve never felt really in his place with them. But he felt in his place, himself, for the first time in ages, there, in LA, with Billy. 

“It’s the best present you could give me,” added Steve again, looking lovingly at him, trying to make him feel better.

Billy smiled, blushing. He looked at his plate and ate some more turkey, really feeling better and really thankful to Steve.

They cleared the table after they finished the dinner, and Steve took two little glasses of whisky, giving one to Billy.

“Wanna toast to our first Chirsmas?” He asked, raising the glass.

Billy put down the glass and smiled. “I have something for you first,” he blushed. 

He took a wrapped box from behind the sofa. It was pretty big, and Steve gasped.

“Billy, we said no present!”, but he smiled at the fancy wrapping, one of Billy's multiple talents. He could do everything he proposed with his hands. “Can I open it?” Steve stared at his face, smiling, caressing the bright paper.

Billy nodded. “Go on. It’s for you”.

Steve unwrapped the present like a child, then opened the box and put the present on the table.

“Billy!”

Billy blushed again. “I found it at the thrift shop… it’s working well. Look in the box again!”

Steve took two tapes from the bottom of the box and read the titles of the mixed tapes Billy did for him. They said “Love for Steve” and “Rock for Steve”, without the song titles. He placed the boombox Billy had given to him on the counter and connected it.

“We will listen to our music now”, he smiled, pressing a little kiss on Billy’s lips. They had a discrete collection of tapes but until that moment they listened to them only in their cars. Sometimes Billy went on purpose in the Camaro to blast some metal and put some steam off.

“No”, smiled Billy in the kiss. “It’s yours”, he said. “You’ll have the last word about the music when we’re together”.

“You sure?” Steve knew how fussy Billy was about music, the tantrums he was capable of throwing about and the infinite discussion about how lame was the music Steve liked. And he knew how difficult it was for him to give up control and that if he gave his word he would keep it.

Billy nodded. “It’s yours”, he repeated. 

Steve hugged him and kissed him, enjoying the warm, sweet scent of his love.

“So we can toast now”, said Billy then, raising his little glass again.

“Well, at this point we can wait a little more”, he said, running in the bedroom and came out with a little packet. “I have a present for you too”, he blushed, giving the soft bundle to Billy.

“You’re so stupid…” smiled Billy, grateful. And then “Steve! You’re nuts! It’s forty dollars!” He raised a satin black button down shirt, long sleeves, from a fancy boutique they visited lately. Billy liked the shirt but it was definitely too expensive.

“Don’t worry, Billy”, cackled Steve. “I cutted hairspray expenses for a while. It’s not a problem, and besides now I don’t really need it, look, I have California surfer hair now”, he passed the hand in his hair, he had beach waves and little blonder strands.

“I really love it!” Billy smiled.

“Try it!”

Billy took off the t-shirt he was wearing and tried the shirt. “It’s perfect, babe”, he lightly touched the fabric, with a moved trembling voice. He finally raised the glass for the third time.

“More surprises?” He smiled.

“No, no more surprised”, answered Steve, smiling in return. 

They toasted and drank. “Merry Christmas, babe”.

“Merry Christmas, Harrington. I love you”.

“I love you too”.

Later, in the bed, Steve hugged his Billy from behind. He felt at this moment he wanted only to cuddle with him in their warmth. 

Billy sank in his arms, grateful for everything he had with Steve, and finally he started not to be worried for life with Steve.

“Ehi babe”, he moved a little in Steve’s arms, after a while when he simply enjoyed their heartbeats.

“Mmm mmm”, moaned Steve.

“What time is it?”

Steve had his eyes closed, so he just guessed. “Past midnight I think”, he whispered.

“So Santa already passed…?”

“What…what are you talking about?”

“I was thinking… Maybe Santa left a last package for you?”

He pushed Steve’s hand between his legs, and Steve smiled.

He wad definitely ready to open a last Christmas present.

[jaggedwolf]

pll rewatch 1x07-1x08

while watching previous episodes, I was thinking, wait, Emily has to have a car this season because of [SPOILER]. Does she just randomly start appearing with one?

of course not. instead she wins a car (the BEAUTIFUL TOYOTA) in a raffle the same night she falls down in a mirror maze

1x07 begins with us still on Homecoming night, where we get (1) Spencer, Hanna, and Aria clinging to each other like frightened puppies while looking for Emily and (2) Toby bringing Emily to the hospital

Spencer suggests the trio split up and is immediately indignant at the idea she be the one to go alone lmao

Poor Toby. No one is nice to him :( Spencer said her classic "The devil has a name and it's Toby!" line but Pam also said "people cross the street when they see him", poor fricking teenager.

Emily is like, as someone who has exchanged more than one sentence with Toby, I don't think he's a murderer? and Spencer cannot stand it she is so annoyed

Emily phrases it as "why am in my bed and not in a body bag" <3 Emily's horror movie visceral imagination

FIRST BARRY MAPLE APPEARANCE. HE'S HERE. THE ONE KIND-OF OKAY COP IN ROSEWOOD. ALL HAIL BARRY MAPLE.

Hanna is back to winning her one-woman #BestAlly competition and she's doing so good! I'll repeat this in the tags of a future post, but it is so interesting to me that this is the first step in Hannily becoming close as a pair - before Hanna gets the photos, Aria and Spencer are the ones expressing individual concern over Emily, but once this arc happens, Hanna is all-in

And says exactly what Emily needs to hear. Also saying things to injured Emily: Pam Fields, who is stressing her daughter out and has no idea why.

Ella, Byron is a cheating douchenozzle but go to your son's sportsball game! Mike's done nothing wrong!

Spencer has zero concept of having a job, let alone a service one. Of course she can waltz right into the kitchen to chit-chat, of course Alex must be lying if he says he's working on a day the club is closed. Oh, Spencer.

She does take to making fruit kebabs to hang out with him

Alex says he's never seen her photo with devil horns before and I don't think he's lying...so an A thing? But I prefer to think that it was the kitchen employee from the day before who was all het up about Spencer's health code violations

can any of the liars look normal when talking to the blind girl. (Spencer about Jenna to Emily: You didn't eat one of her cookies, did you?)

well, Emily did okay, but Emily had to deal with Jenna straight up sitting on her bed. Who does that?? But very funny in light of the S2 Halloween episode, isn't Emily dealing with enough.

Aria playing peacemaker as Spencer and Hanna argue in the woods. Oh, Aria, it's like watching a terrier trying to get in between a bloodhound and a golden retriever.

and here we get our first inter-liar callout of Spencer's parents being there to bail her out! I completely forgot it was Hanna who does this, but very fair, Hanna, very fair

Lucas and Hanna bond over watching the stupidest youtube videos, which makes so much sense for them. SMH Sean, not even a smile for turkey on a skateboard? Between that and sending Aria flowers, you deserve the shenanigans you accidentally find yourself in later this season

Emily and Maya get to have nice cute banters about going on a date and manage to make out at a zombie movie without anything bad happening! Good for them!

Especially since everything non-Maya makes Emily look so distressed

like Toby, which leads to the best conversation Emily, Spencer, and Hanna have on Emily's window seat

Emily, clearly upset: I couldn't bring myself to ask. Jenna was so upset. But his bike… it looked like it was… like it was wrecked.

Spencer: Well, I'm not gonna cry over this, and neither should you.

Hanna: Spencer, if she liked him she can cry about it!

Spencer: Well, I'm sorry for speaking.

Spencer: ......Look she's right, I can't tell you what to feel.

and yet Spencer will never stop attempting to, love this maniac

good god I forgot about the Jason recasting, I look forward to when this dark-haired suit-wearer with a stick up his ass is gone

Best A message:

SUBJECT: THE DEDICATION

DO IT RIGHT. I'LL BE WATCHING. JUST LIKE TOM SAWYER. --A

Why did A prepend the message with a subject, do they miss emailing Spencer? I had to explain the Tom Sawyer reference too haha.

A's gonna trick them into painting a fence next

We get so many flashbacks of Alison being terrible by the lakeshore that summer day

Flashback dynamic notes: Emily smiles and laughs at everything Alison says, no matter how mean; Aria is horny for Noel and pays the least attention to Alison; Hanna laughs at the first insult Ali throws at Lucas but then very weakly tries to defend him; Spencer is...Spencer is almost getting bored of Alison's terribleness?

and yet "that's immortality my darling" remains, and so does Alison's bracelet in her nightstand drawer

I like to think Aria had to dig through all her shit to find her bracelet, compared to the other three XD

"what about justice" re: never finding out who killed Alison, Spencer my sweet summer child....sometimes Spencer is the most naive of the liars, in her own way

Spencer's already sent two S.O.S texts this season. Did the girls agree on this code or did Spencer just decide this is her way of asking for help and everyone automatically understood it

isn't this memorial a bit too revealing of her dynamic with y'all, I'd be so self-conscious

and yet, even after an episode filled with flashbacks of Alison's cruelty, I understand all four of their speeches for her.

[redrose-arrow]

RedRose (re)reads: The Ruins of Gorlan

aka the book that i originally hated 

ngl, i know the first sentence by heart. 

reading the first ever description of the wargals just hits different after having read TRR6

i think the prologue hits harder every time i read it - especially now that TEY have been out for a while

i would die for the wards. no cap. 

why am i so nervous for choosing day??? 

STRANGE, HE THOUGHT, HOW SELDOM PEOPLE LOOKED UP. 

bby will i love you

lowkey in love with baron arald, ngl, the man deserves so much more

martin honey, you’re trying and i appreciate that 

i always forget rodney has “an enormous moustache” but i love that for him. i also forgot that arald has a beard. i always forget the beards. 

imagine being nervous as hell, looking up, and looking into halt’s eyes. i too would simply pass away. 

“halt had a habit of coming up on you unnoticed” how do you know, will. how do you know? 

rodney’s “you don’t know what you’re in for” is kinda sad when you remember that initially horace thought the bullying was normal

arald and nigel must make some team, i’d pay to see that. 

when george says “thank you” and arald is “taken aback”,,,, does no one ever say thank you??? :(

“what would you do with a turkey pie?” “eat it” as you should girlie

THE RABBITS

i still wanna know what halt was thinking when pauline was trying so damn hard not to laugh. 

i can’t tell if halt setting will up was a funny prank or a mean set-up

“climbed it as easily as you get on your horse in the mroning. easier, in fact.” iconic. 

arald slamming back by implying that being apprenticed to halt is a punishment: even more iconic. 

“he hated it when people didn’t know he was joking” so do i, arald, so do i. 

THE WILDFLOWERS. BRIGHTLY COLOURED.

i still hate halt for the housework, ngl. 

i’m a little weak for the “simply oakleaf design”

“an intelligent force?” “not intelligent. intelligence. although it does help if you intelligence force is also intelligent.”

i will now interpret timeline inconsistencies as halt just full-on lying about everything. 

i still wanna know why halt was in the kitchen when will stole pies. 

forgetting that there’d be a stream in the way is something that’d be lowkey funny. hella inconvient, but funny. 

will’s obsession with swords makes me so sad

“how did you learn how to do that?” “practice” wow so useful, thank you halt

WHY DOES THIS BOY ASK SO MANY QUESTIONS ???

i love that this book already implies that horace is gonna be better than rodney. boy’s a natural. damn. it’s what he deserves. 

“sometime i think we should forget the weapons training and just throw all the paper at the enemy - bury them in it.” - karel knows best

“if you feel that’s a good idea - go ahead.” yeah no thank you

halt just really threw will onto a horse for the first time and said “go for it”, huh? seems very safe. 

i also still wanna know why abelard was with old bob

i just think it’s really cute that bonding with tug is one of will’s favourite things from his first apprentice months

i love how entertained arald is by stories about halt 

technically, the victory that’s awarded to halt for leading the cavalry, should be awarded to gilan. but i think halt purposefully “takes” the credit, so that morgarath will come after him, not gilan. in this essay-

halt calling will by his name instead of boy >>>

i always forget about salt peter. but here he is at last again. 

i love halt blaming will for salt peter answering in questions. i would do the same. 

halt dealing with salt peter should be more of a meme than it currently is

i think the boar scene would be even more incredible on the big screens. i also love how excited the men are about it. 

i have a soft spot for how protective halt, rodney, and arald are of will and horace. 

“he wasn’t in a rush to see another one” uh-oh. should’ve known. 

tug attacking a wild animal... stresses me out now more than it did. s/o to the wolf. 

THE END OF THE BOAR SCENE. i am not in tears but i sure am crying.  

i forgot that the boar scene was the context for “people will think what they want to. never take too much notice of it” kslsjdj i love soft halt 

halt knowing that rodney knows and will appreciate horace is just chef’s kiss

shoutout to rodney’s gut, honestly

why is always “boar scene”, and never the abuse scene? i think that one’s even more pivotal for 

i think the abuse scene is also the first time halt is established as a dilf and no i will not take that back

ok but also halt is a little too cheerful lmao, it makes me terrified

“take one more step and i’ll put an arrow through you” sounds like something halt would say, but it was baby will.

“the chief ranger” i bet they only call crowley that as a joke

“and it’ll be gilan because it’s always gilan” it truly always is, eh? always was, always will be

“Halt, Halt!” is top tier commedy and i will not be accepting counter arguments at this time 

i am in love with how readily gilan accepts will. 

so it’s canon that gilan can imitate halt perfectly. duly noted

if will thought that maybe gilan was too small for battleschool, then yes, gilan is taller than will and halt, but not super tall apparently

IT WAS A WARM SENSE OF BELONGING, AS IF, SOMEHOW, HE HAD ARRIVED HOME FOR THE FIRST TIME IN HIS LIFE. 

i cannot put into words how obsessed i am with them arriving at the gathering grounds and the absolute chaos that is reigning there. i am simply obsessed with rangers doing ranger business. 

“crowley wants the army alerted and mobilised” friendly reminder that crowley is like the second most powerful person in the kingdom. 

halt and gilan talking about the mission has me so soft, the mutual trust and love

“i’d happily kill someone for a cup of coffee” “light a fire to brew it, and you might have to do just that.”

poor next flute player

“sometimes, he thought wryly, a reputation for being right all the time could be a heavy burden” me when people ask me about salt peter and i don’t remember who tf that is

“it’s the kalkara. they have a new target and they’re hunting” the grasp that this will have on cinema audiences... uncanny

shoutout to rodney for getting will into the castle, because those guards were hella incapable

okay but arald is really showing why he deserves to be redmont’s baron and i am lowkey so proud of him. 

do i know everyone’s gonna be fine? yes. am i terrified nonetheless? also yes. 

the fire, the shooting, will,,,,, you legend, i am speechless

“jenny was a difficult person to refuse” good for her

there’s absolutely no reason for george not to be here. this is where the slander begins and i do not appreciate it

i still believe that at first, halt absolutely refused to take time to recover from his wounds, that arald send pauline “to straighten him out”, and that from there on out, halt refused to do absolutely anything because he was “recovering”. 

nah i think he would’ve been an especially great teacher in those weeks. 

THE KISS. I AM LOSING. MY MIND. 

“aren’t you coming with me?” “not invited” i think halt threatened to get arald fired if he invited him. no, i don’t think - i know. 

‘i am a ranger, my lord’ TEARS

AND HE WAS SMILING. AND I WAS CRYING. 

i love it when halt uses his words because he can be so good with them if he wants to. 

halt’s revelation that he was the man Daniel saved has my heart skip beats

HE FELT AT PEACE

that’s ironic because i do not feel ANY PEACE

[kelyon]

Hot Cocoa and Stolen Kisses 6: Orange

Lacey and Gold spend Christmas together

Read on AO3

“You don’t happen to have a zester, do you?” Lacey looked down at the bag of oranges sitting on the counter of Roald’s kitchen.

Without missing a beat, he pulled open a drawer and took out a long microplane. He presented it to her with a showy wave, like a juggler.

“Do you think I’m some kind of amateur?” he teased.

Lacey crinkled her nose. “Next you’ll be telling me you’ve got a fine-mesh strainer I can use instead of half a two-liter bottle and a coffee filter.”

“It’s called a chinois.” His hand lingered on the small of her back as he passed her to get  to another cabinet. He retrieved a large, cone-shaped sieve on a long handle. “We can line it with cheesecloth, if the expert thinks it’s necessary.”

She shrugged, mildly amused at him calling her an expert in anything, much less cooking. In the weeks since they’d started dating, Roald had proved his prowess in the kitchen over the course of a dozen extravagant  meals. Lacey had nothing to her credit except hot chocolate. 

It was Christmas Eve and it was the first time Lacey was making cocoa at his place. As well as she knew her recipe, it was a little odd to make it here. Uncomfortable, like brushing your teeth using the wrong hand. She kept having to ask him where he kept utensils and ingredients. This kitchen was pristine, so she was hyper-aware of spills and other messes, along with how many dishes she was dirtying. Ways of doing things that were fine in her apartment suddenly seemed below par for a real kitchen.  

Roald had no idea, of course. He spent the whole evening being lovely. He fetched whatever she needed or told her when it was close at hand. He asked questions and offered suggestions--not as any kind of dig or to prove how much better he was at cooking, but because he was genuinely passionate about this stuff. He wanted her take on things. He listened to her ramble on about her ‘process’ while she tried to make her actions look natural and sophisticated. Like this Julia Child chef he kept referencing--she probably never made a mess in the kitchen. Roald was so sweet, so patient. He deserved the world. All Lacey wanted was to impress him.

Prove to him that she was worthwhile.    

Aside from her ridiculous nerves, it was a beautiful night. Storybrooke was the kind of American small town where it was legally mandated that it snow on Christmas Eve. Earlier in the month, there had been honest-to-God carolers roaming the streets. Every house had a wreath on the door and lights in the windows. None of them compared to all three stories of Roald’s pink Victorian mansion. 

He had hired decorators to fill his house with fresh pine inside and out. There were miles of lights and red velvet ribbons and garlands of real cranberries strung up all over. The tree in his living room was eight feet tall, trimmed with bulbs in every color. There was a turkey in the fridge for tomorrow, to be served with mashed potatoes and oyster stuffing. It was more food than the two of them would be able to eat, but it meant something to him to have too much. 

 He told Lacey he had always wanted to go all-out for Christmas, but never had before. This was the first year he had anyone to share it with. 

She scraped an orange across the zester over a ‘mise en place bowl’--which was just a fancy name for a regular small bowl you could put ingredients in. Frowning, she eyeballed the small mound of orange zest against the dutch oven full of lightly-steaming cocoa on the stove. Should she zest another, or would that overpower the chocolate?

“How much do you like orange, anyway?” she asked Roald. This flavor had been a special request, once she’d finally broken him down to ask for what flavor he really wanted, and not just take whatever nonsense she thought up.

“At Christmastime? I like it quite a bit.” 

He was standing next to her at the counter, close enough that she could see his wistful smile. She knew that look by now, the look of him wanting something but being afraid to have it. 

He used to look at her like that. 

She reached for another orange. “Then I’ll make sure there’s plenty.”  

   After stirring the zest into the chocolate, she set a timer for half an hour. 

“Don’t wanna risk the orange turning bitter if we leave it in too long,” she explained. “We’ll give it a taste when the timer goes off, and if it’s good I’ll strain it out with your shin-wah.” She exaggerated the French word. “Then a quick reheat if we need it, and Christmas cocoa will be yours.”

“Ours.” Roald’s hands were at her waist as he stood behind her. He nibbled on her ear lobe. “I want to share it with you, my Lacey.”  His lips traveled down to her neck. “None of this would happen if it weren’t for you.”

She pushed back against him, grinding her ass against his body in a way she knew drove him wild.  

“That’s just as true for me, love,” she whispered. “If it wasn’t for you…”

“Shh.” He turned her around in his arms, held her close and kissed her. “We’re here now, sweetheart. We’re together. We have each other. I love you.”

In the twenty-three days since she’d first  heard him say that, it still hadn’t gotten old. 

****

The timer was loud enough to interrupt their impromptu make-out session. Lacey shooed  Roald out to the living room while she wrangled the hot chocolate. 

She hated to admit it, but it was easier to do things without him in the kitchen. Her head was clearer. It wasn’t embarrassing to poke around in cupboards looking for things. She’d get there, she knew it.  Once she understood the layout, she could feel like she belonged in Roald’s space. She wanted to be as comfortable in the kitchen as she was in his bedroom. Lacey grinned to herself at the thought. That would be very comfortable indeed. 

After a bit of rummaging, she found a pot to drain the cocoa into. She put the pot into the sink and set the chinois inside. Then she took a deep breath and braced herself to pick up the hot cocoa off the stove. 

At her apartment, she cooked in a dinky aluminum spaghetti pot, but Roald’s kitchen was equipped with a five-and-a-half-quart dutch oven imported from France. It was sturdy, which meant it was heavy. Even heavier when it was full of a steaming-hot liquid that was currently the most precious commodity in Lacey’s life. She could heft it up, but wouldn’t be able to rest it against her abdomen while she walked, like she would any other bulky weight. This mission would depend entirely on the strength of her twig-like arms. But she could do it.

 Slowly and carefully, with a potholder covering each hand, she made her way from the stove to the sink.

It was unnatural, how happy she was to succeed in pouring the cocoa into the chinois. She didn’t spill a Goddamned drop! That proved it. She knew what she was doing. She was strong and she was responsible. She could be trusted with the thing that meant so much to the man who meant so much to her. When Lacey set down the dutch oven, she was relieved of more than just the weight of enamel-coated cast iron. 

Earlier, Roald had gathered up supplies for serving  the cocoa. Lacey put together a plate of his shortbread biscuits and set it on a breakfast tray. He never ate with her cocoa, he said it didn’t need any accompaniment. She mostly agreed, but buttery homemade shortbread was worth an exception. 

Next on the tray was an eighteenth-century porcelain hot chocolate set. Apparently cocoa had been a big deal back in the day and it needed its own servingware. Details were hazy as to whether Roald had always owned this set or had taken it home from his shop just for tonight. Every piece was glazed dark green and hand-painted with purple thistles. He must have chosen it because it reminded him of Scotland.

The hot chocolate set was distinct from the bone china tea set that was prominently displayed in his dining room. That teapot was squat and round, where the chocolate pot was much taller. More elegant, Lacey thought. The cups were also taller than most teacups. The proportions were more like normal mugs, though made of much finer stuff.  The porcelain was so thin and delicate you could see light shine through them. 

She was exceptionally careful as she poured the strained cocoa into the tall pot and arranged the cups and saucers around it. She tried to tell herself that she was being silly. At this point in the relationship, Roald wasn’t going to call everything off if she accidentally chipped a cup. It would be fine.

Still, she wanted to be careful with his stuff. Because being responsible was important. Because he was important. 

Fortunately, the cocoa tray wasn’t half as heavy as the dutch oven had been. Lacey made it from the kitchen to the living room with no mishaps.   

She wasn’t fucking anything up. 

****

Roald was sitting on the floor in front of the fire. He had arranged an ungodly number of pillows and blankets into a kind of nest with the couch as a back. He turned around when Lacey came in. His eyes were practically twinkling. 

“Hey,” he smiled. “Come sit.”

She set the cocoa tray on the floor by his feet, then snuggled in next to him under a plaid wool blanket. Since they were at home, she had gotten him to put on a sweater instead of a suit. The burgundy cashmere was soft against her cheek. 

“This is very cozy.”

“That’s the idea.” He draped his arm over her shoulder, pressed his lips to the side of her head. “The tree looks so big from down here.”

“It’s a big tree from any angle.”

“Yes, but this makes it feel larger than life. Like…” He looked down, suddenly closed-lipped. 

At this point in their relationship, Lacey could practically see inside his head. Every time he stopped talking like that, it meant he was thinking of something he didn’t want to talk about but desperately needed to. It had happened a few times since they’d started dating.

“Like?” she prompted.

“Like when I was a child,” he finished, still looking away. “We--the women who raised me after my father left--they had an artificial tree, probably less than three feet high. It had to go on a little table in the front room. There wasn’t a lot of space for storage in that house and real trees were expensive, even then…” He sighed, shook his head. 

She waited. His past was hard for him to reminisce about. From what he told her, it had been hard for him to live through. 

“It was the first Christmas tree I ever had,” he said at last. “I was… seven years old, maybe eight when he left me there, and I had never lived in a place with a Christmas tree.” He gave a laugh, dark and bitter. “God knows Malcolm Gold wasn’t going to sober up long enough to be festive.”

She squeezed his hand, then leaned forward to reach for the cocoa. “Your father is such an asshole.”  

“Was,” Roald corrected while she poured. “I have that much to be grateful for.”

She handed him a cup and saucer, then poured some cocoa for herself. She scooted back until she was next to him again. Roald looked down into the chocolate, but didn’t taste it. 

Oh, he was in a bad way.

“But the Christmas tree?” she asked softly.

At the sound of her voice, his shoulders relaxed. His face lost the grave lines the memories had brought out of him. He brought his cocoa close to his chest, up to the level of his heart.

“That Christmas tree.” His smile was almost too small to see. “That stunted, re-used, five quid, plastic Christmas tree--was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. I was… dazzled by it. I’d kneel at the table in the window like it was an altar and look up into a world of blinking jewels.”

His gaze shifted to the tree they had now--the tree he’d never put up, before Lacey had come into his life. Multicolored lights washed over his face. For an instant, Lacey saw the little boy he’d been. A boy who had spent his whole life afraid and unloved but was now, for the first time, coming into a home where he’d be cared for and cherished. 

Lacey had already loved Roald for what he had brought into her life. Now her heart blazed with a fierce determination to bring something into his. She had to protect that little boy, had to give him everything he had ever lacked. 

“I want to kiss you,” she told him. “But I don’t want to spill the hot chocolate.”

He laughed at that, deep and hearty, actually happy. “At least you’ve finally started to ask.”

With one hand, he held his saucer out to the side. She did the same thing, but wished they had put the cups down altogether. As she kissed him, she wanted to press against him fully, get as close as it was possible to be. Not just sex--they’d done that plenty. Lacey wanted to crawl inside Roald’s skin, to burrow into the very soul of him and envelop him with her love.

He seemed to know. He kissed her on the forehead when they broke apart. 

“Thank you, sweetheart. It’s easier to speak of these things with you.”

She sniffled, then tried to pretend that she hadn’t. She straightened up. “You--you’ve got to drink that while it’s still hot, you know.”

He kissed her again, soft and sweet. “As you say, my love.” He raised his cup, and clinked it against hers. “Merry Christmas, Lacey.”

She drew her knees up to her chest to watch him drink. As he inhaled the scent of chocolate and oranges, the years seemed to melt away from his face. All the worry, all the heartbreak, all the loneliness was gone. Lacey’s heart filled, not only with compassion, but with a kind of possessive pride. She had done that, no one else. She had helped him. She made him feel good, feel safe, feel loved. And she was gonna keep doing it, for as long as he would let her.

His lips parted and he let the cocoa wash over his tongue. Then his eyes shot open and his body jerked a little. He covered his mouth with his hand.

Shit.

“Shit, what’s wrong?” Lacey took his cup and put it to the side. “Is it too hot, or did I--” 

Without a word, Roald grabbed her by the arms and pulled her in for a kiss.

It was so abrupt, so unexpected, that Lacey spent half a second completely rigid. Then she sank into him. Her arms went up over his shoulders. Roald held her waist, pressed her tight against him. Even when they broke apart to breathe, he didn’t let her go.

His body shook, and it took Lacey too long to realize he was laughing.

“This is perfect,” he said softly, his arms wrapped around her middle. “You’re so perfect, Lacey.” He kissed her again, covered her face with kisses.

When he looked at her, his eyes were large and moist with tears. His smile was almost too big for his face.

“Thank you, sweetheart,” he whispered.

“Oh, Roald,” she murmured. 

Holding his face in both hands, she kissed the tears away from his eyes. She’d never had a boyfriend brave enough to cry in front of her. She’d never met anyone who had as much passion in his heart as Roald Gold.

“I love you,” she whispered.

He held her hand, brought her fingertips to his lips. “I love you more than my own life.”

She had to laugh at that, a short chuckle that would have been a scoff if it wasn’t sincere. She shook her head. “Considering your life, baby…”

“It wasn’t all bad.” He held her in one arm and reached for his cocoa with the other. “I had a few happy years. With oranges and hot cocoa at Christmas.”

“So that’s what it is.” Lacey grabbed a shortbread biscuit off the plate. “That’s why you wanted this flavor.”

“We never had much for extras,” he said. “Though even having the necessities  was more than I was used to with my father.” He sighed. “But at Christmas, oranges were cheap. Both my foster mothers had grown up in poverty, so stockings full of oranges and apples were as much as they’d ever gotten as far as presents.” He gave a small smile. “In a gray Scottish winter, having an orange is like carrying the sun in your pocket.”

“And the cocoa?”

He shook his head ruefully. “It was the smallest extravagance in the world. We didn’t have presents or parties, we didn’t go out on the town--but we had cocoa. And we had each other.”

He took a sip, then sighed. It seemed like a piece of his world had been made right.  

“What happened to them?” Lacey asked. It seemed obvious, but she wanted to hear it how Roald wanted to tell her.

“They died.” He said it simply. “When I was twenty, just before I’d earned enough money to set them up in comfort. I lost them both within six months of each other. First to heart failure, then to heartbreak. You know how it can be with old couples.”

“A couple, huh?” Lacey bit her shortbread consideringly. “So they were elderly Scottish lesbians in--what, the seventies? Eighties? I bet they had stories to tell.”

Roald nodded, but said nothing. Still holding her, he stared ahead into the crackling fire.

“And since then you’ve had no one else in your life?”

“Just heartless girlfriends and shady business associates.” He took a drink, a long one this time. “No one worthwhile--until you.”

Lacey’s face went hot. She pulled away from him. The blanket they shared was covered in crumbs from her shortbread. A mess. Of course she made a mess. She brushed the crumbs away, into the fire.

“I--I don’t know if you’ve thought that part out yet. I mean, sure I make decent cocoa, but--”

“Sweetheart.” He put a hand over hers, to still her anxious cleaning. “Trust me. You’re worthwhile.”

“How do you know? We’ve been dating for less than a month.”

“The happiest month of the last thirty years.” He squeezed her hand, looked into her eyes. 

He meant it. God, he really meant it. What had she done to him?

Lacey sighed. “What if you’re just getting carried away? Swept up in the rush of emotion?”

“Me?” His eyebrows raised. “Lacey, I thought it was understood: Of the two of us, I’m the one far less likely to act on impulse.”

Her lips twitched in involuntary amusement, but she didn’t say anything.

“If anything, I’m sure I’m too deliberative,” Roald went on. “There’s something I’ve been wanting to talk to you about for days and I haven’t determined the best way to start.” 

She rubbed her face. “So you’re doing it now?”

“If you don’t mind.”

“Sure.” Lacey took a drink of her cocoa. It really wasn’t bad. She had never thought to put oranges and chocolate together before. “What’s going on?”

Roald cleared his throat. “The lease on your apartment is up at the end of the month.”

She gave her boyfriend a look. “Landlord talk? Now?”

“It’s important, I promise.”

She rolled her eyes, but sat up straight and looked him in the face. Apparently this had turned into a business cuddle. 

“I thought my lease was set up to automatically renew. I was gonna go month to month.”

Actually, her original plan had been to leave Maine after a year. She had wanted to see what other states had to offer or maybe head up to Canada. That idea had gone out the window as soon as things with Roald had started to get interesting. 

“I don’t…” He cleared his throat for the second time in five minutes. “You don’t have to rent month to month if you don’t want to.”

Lacey smirked. “Mr. Gold, are you trying to get me to sign another contract?”

“No,” he said. A smile flickered at her attempt at a joke. “Actually, I think it’s bad business to rent to someone with whom I’m romantically involved.”

At those words, some irrational spirit of indignation flared up in her belly. She jerked away from him, started to stand up. 

“If you’re going to break up with me on Christmas Eve, it had better be for a better reason than--”

“Move in with me,” he cut her off. He was still on the ground. His hands reached out to her. “That’s what I’m asking for, Lacey. I would like it if you lived here. With me. As my girlfriend. No contracts, no rent, just… us.”

Lacey plopped onto the couch, so quickly it was almost a fall.

“Us?” she whispered. She looked down at him. “You want us to live here. Together?” 

It wasn’t a totally new concept. They had been dating properly for a month now. They’d spent almost every day at one or another of their places, and just as many nights. And it wasn’t like he was asking her to marry him. This was just a solution to the problem of him being her landlord.

She stood up again.

“Wait, no. Roald, I’m rich. If this is just about business, I can buy the apartment from you for a fair price.”

“That apartment comes with the entire library.”

She shrugged. “My parents always wanted me to read more. They’ll pay for it.” Her parents would pay extra just to see her with a permanent address.

“Lacey, it’s not just about business.” From his place on the floor, he took her hands. “I want to live with you. Every day. I hate every time I say good-bye to you, even when I know I’ll see you in a few hours. I want you in my home. I want you in my life, sweetheart.”

“Me?” She sank to her knees, overwhelmed. “Roald, honey, I-- You know I’m a hot mess.”

He smiled. “And you know I’m a cold mess,” he said. “We’re people, sweetheart. We’re messy. Now, I don’t expect you to fix all my problems, and I know you don’t think I can fix yours--but we can still help each other. You know how much you’ve helped me already.”

She squeezed his hand, shifted from her knees to her butt so she was sitting next to him again. “Yeah,” she said. “And I do love being around you. I do love you! You know that, right?”

“I do.”

“But I don’t want to fuck it up,” she whispered. “I don’t want to lose you.”

“You won’t.” He leaned in close and started to kiss her. “I know you, Lacey French.” Kiss. “I know you’re adventurous.” Kiss. “And dedicated.” Kiss. “Inventive and intelligent.” Kiss, kiss. “I know I want to have you by my side.” Kiss. “For as long as I deserve you.”

“Shut up,” she nibbled on his neck. “You deserve me. You deserve better than me. You deserve someone like you: Classy and sophisticated. Smart--”

“You are smart, I already said that.” 

Lacey chuckled. “And funny. Does anyone know how funny you are, Roald?”

“No one in this town knows my first name.” He kissed her. “You’re the only one that cared. You’re the only one I want. Just tell me that you want me too, sweetheart. Tell me you want to be with me.”

“I really do.” She wrapped her arms around his shoulders, straddling his legs. “I do want to be around you. Day and night. For as long as you’ll put up with me.”

“Forever then,” he whispered.

“Or at least til the cocoa runs out.”

“Or you get tired of my cooking.”

“Or the sex stops being interesting.”

“Or you meet someone closer to your age.”

“Or I have a baby and get fat.”

For just a second, he pulled away. He looked at her with wide, disbelieving eyes. “Now who’s moving too fast?”

She shrugged. “You still want a family, don’t you? You said you used to want that. I bet you’d love to have a little kid to spoil rotten at Christmas. If I move in with you, that’s only going to be more possible. We’ll have to talk about it.”

“Well, I’d like to be married before I have children.”

Lacey nodded. “We’ll have to talk about that too. We’ll have to talk about laundry and taxes and my parents in Australia and all kinds of dumb, boring, important shit. You know that, right? If I move in with you, it’s real life. It won’t be all hot cocoa and stolen kisses. Do you still want it?” 

He didn’t hesitate for an instant. “Yes, Lacey. I want all of it. All the mundane tedium of life. All of the highs and all of the lows and all of the nothing and everything in the middle. I want all of that with you.”

“Good,” she kissed him. “Because I want it too.” 

[patchoulol]

If I seem like I'm acting like my dog died it's because my dog died.

Cocoa was a brindle bulldog that was legally distinguishable from a pitbull and a big baby that was scared of everything, especially thunder. If I picked her up it was basically a Scooby and Shaggy scene. She was also so ridiculously strong I kept comparing her to a hyena. She ate a door once just because she wanted to be where I was, and she bit through an SNES controller that was much older than her in one chomp because her big wagging butt knocked it down and she thought everything plastic was a chew toy. She knocked things off furniture by mistake so often she started to think anything that fell down in earshot was her fault, even after she got better about it. I'm pretty sure someone abandoned her in a crate in the forest, because any time I put her in one, she panicked and destroyed it, so I never did again. I made my mom put up with her on Christmas at her place because I didn't want to leave her alone too long and find out she ate a door to find me again, but she behaved like a good girl.

Unfortunately she had the bad luck of having her first cluster seizures in her life while every nearby and not nearby vet was closed for Thanksgiving and didn't make it. She held on for a really long time and seemed to be better a few times, but she passed away while we were both trying to sleep. I already hate Thanksgiving. My family is pretty aware having someone who panics outside their house and doesn't eat meat over for "Turkey Day" isn't great for either of us, so I stayed home with Cocoa like most recent years. We're all different mixes of Cherokee, though, so if anything we prove enough of us did get along for enough meals together. I might just be alone in my house next year missing her, I don't know. Cocoa was supposed to stay with me at mom's on Christmas this year. Though I've never called Mama mom in my life, and she also always texts Coco instead of Cocoa.

I met Cocoa as a stray digging through my trash, who started to bark at my door to be let inside like she belonged here. (She did.) She was almost a skeleton and the moment I let her lay in my lap after bringing her in I don't think she got up for hours. She had a worn out collar but no tags and no chip. I tried not to get attached but I think we didn't find her owners because they didn't want her back. I took care of her for her entire life like she deserved and even got her through an awful heartworm treatment, so fuck them. Eventually she was almost too fat and sleeping in bed with me every night while I rubbed the big tummy I gave her like she had her own side of the bed. (She did.) If I were up this late and she wanted to go to bed, she'd keep laying her chin on my thigh for headpats and standing belly rubs until I went with her. I have sleep apnea, and sometimes I'd find her sitting up and sniffing my nose to check if I was breathing when I woke up because she was worried about me. The last time I returned the favor she didn't wake up because she wasn't breathing and I didn't know what to do with myself so I started typing this.

[40sandfabulousaf]

大家好! The stall selling fish soup and porridge also sells zha jiang mian (noodles with pork and bean sauce) and I wanted to try it. ML, MI, SC and I returned to the stall and I ordered my fix. What can I say? Every version so far has been amazing. The savoury sauce coats every strand after tossing, the noodles are chewy, the pork is tasty and, for this version, the Chinese spinach adds texture. What I also like is the little bowl of peppery broth, which appears to be the same one served with their ban mian (board noodles). This meal was very delicious, it kept me so full, I couldn't stomach dinner and it cost $4. Can't wait to return and try their other menu items!

Back to sushi because why not. I decided on an all-salmon meal and grabbed a tray of nigiri sushi as well as a tray of sashimi. After paying, I sat down to eat. This is my favourite way of eating salmon, especially on a scorching hot afternoon. It's hard to pick which I prefer, but sashimi probably wins by a small margin. I may have a full sashimi lunch down the road after I've tried other meal options at this Japanese corner. They have unagi and cooked scallops with rice as well as yakitori and rice bentos which look very tempting.

ML, SC and I returned to the Hakka yong tau foo stall because we couldn't get enough of the delicious, perfectly-seasoned pork used to stuff vegetables as well as tofu items and fragrant chilli sauce. Customers can also choose curry gravy instead of clear broth, but we like the broth. Besides the curry gravy might mask the taste of the pork. This time, ML and I skipped the noodles and ordered the larger serving of 6 pieces (the regular with noodles comes with 4 pieces). I can't decide which I like better, both were so tasty. But I think I'll order meepok again the next time because it's hard to resist my favourite noodles.

I'm still doing the 250 calorie challenges out of compassion for Palestinians in Gaza. I just don't share them as often. This genocidal war is still ongoing and the official death toll inches closer to 40,000 by the day. Starvation is spreading in the war-torn strip and my heart goes out to the Palestinians who continue to suffer so much. I also no longer trust countries which proclaim themselves as the champions of human rights whilst supplying weapons to Israel. What is committed against Palestinians is barbaric, cruel, wicked and downright evil and they're indirectly facilitating it.

These countries are so shameless, I can't even. So yeah, there's nothing left to say because at this point, I'm wholly disgusted. We've reached an age of depravation when the brutal murder of another human being is somehow celebrated and justified. These are very dark times for mankind and it makes me wonder how the rules based order serves humanity when thousands of innocent lives are ended in such barbaric ways. Some countries just don't deserve to lead the world. 下次见!

[keefwho]

November 23 - 2023 Thursday

11:12pm

I took the day off today like was advised of me, I think it was a good idea. I woke up and immediately tried to tune into the Thanksgiving parade. The best I could do was watching this puppet guy stream it on Twitch which was actually wholesome and funny. I missed the first half of it though. Afterwards I made a bologna sandwich and rice for breakfast. A little smaller than usual to save room for Thanksgiving lunch. While drinking my coffee I decided to work on a picture I was thinking about last night to tell Daisy how thankful I am of her. While doing that I was chilling in a Black Cat in desktop and was briefly interviewed by this Australian guy before he got in an unironic fight with a couple of trolling teens. It started off funny but over time it got more toxic and people actually got upset. It sucked to watch because I thought the guy was smarter than that. I'm surprised at how many people just give in to strangers shit talking them. It was a nice time, it felt good hangin around and goofin off. I then joined a random furry who was in a cuddle pile with a few people, making sexual references constantly and flustering one another. Shit I can NOT understand and never did. Afterwards I was unsure what to do with myself for awhile. I got that brain fog and tried to sit down with a stream to anchor myself to. I didn't really figure out what to do, I sort of just waited until lunch time. It was then I found out that I didn't have a can of turkey spam like I thought and that sort of put a hamper on my lunch. Instead I had to use hickory smoke flavor which meant I couldn't bake it like I planned so I just fried everything in the pan. I had spam, hash browns with onions, green beans and carrots, corn, stuffing, and gravy. I wasn't in the eating mood when I made all this but it actually came out fantastic. Wasnt TOO many calories over either but it was still a pretty big meal. After lunch I tried to work on another drawing but wasn't feeling it. I still had the same problem not knowing what to do but I tuned into a stream that was actually kinda cozy even though it wasn't someone I usually liked. After a bit Daisy said she wanted to kill Ganon tonight so I had to grind a little for the lightscale trident I needed. We got all set up and finally went through the finale of TOTK. It took about an hour and a half and I recorded the event for the future to check out someday. It was a spectacular ending. I loved the fight with ganon and his dragon design. I'm glad Zelda was turned back to normal. During bedtime I played Neopets and started my first big combat portion it seems.

Degen time. Before bed I was chilling but wanted to do something. I've really been into cucking lately and still am but it's starting to wear off which is good I think. Theres just a lot I've wanted to try or discuss that I haven't been able to so I keep feeling the need to do it. I don't wanna go full cuck though because I can see the negative effects that might have on my opinion of myself. Deep down I want a normal mutual engagement most of the time. But in some ways I don't feel like I deserve that or am capable so I try to settle for more degrading things. Thats not always bad though, only if I do it too much.

[that-seems-stupid-lets-do-it]

you say that Masako would be a witch + does witch things a lot. she also seems like the wanderer type to me. specifically someone who thinks they are and thinks that they want to be a lone wanderer, but desperately desires company. they desire company more than anything else in the world and it hurts them so much to have that want that they just can't get rid of. [ adding the image so i can look at it while i type this out!! ]

i was thinking of a few posts you've made about her when drawing this, and in general. she's a really interesting character and i love how you represent her through your storytelling and how she represents herself in her blog. i can get a grasp of who she is and what she wants- stability. she wants that so badly its. agh. but she cant get it. firepoint is the only stable thing in her life and that's being threatened to slip through her grasp, closer and closer every waking day, every moment she isn't with them is one moment left to enjoy the little time they have

college looms over her and represents what she doesn't want to happen- change. removal of the status quo. threatening to take the one thing that didn't change or hurt or do anything different away from her, which is her band. does she even know why she's going to college? is it to make her parents happy? for her future? what is she even doing, taking this privilege that most people will never get to have and wasting it? 'what a selfish child she is.' firepoint is her only anchor in a violent sea of moving forward, and the rocks the anchor are lodged under are beginning to move away

i also relate to this part of masako. i'm not really a feelings talker. being open is hard and being closed off is easy and you can be better at that way faster than being open. being vulnerable is a skill that's hard to master and we will rock in "i'll do this quiet thing instead of something you'd realize i'm doing to show my appreciation." she doesn't expect anyone to reciprocate it, and when they do it means the fucking world to her. she'd burn the earth to the ground for someone who genuinely cares for her

going back to the lone wanderer thing: i think that once she latches onto a person or a place, she'd want to avoid whatever came before. her past? doesn't matter. only firepoint. her parents? dont worry about them, they aren't important! we need to focus on getting some food right now because i'm STARVING ^^ i also want her and jun's card to be matching somehow like setsuko + kenshin's. i'm not sure if i want to draw it specifically matching/related, but there's going to be a little story for the white day au behind it which ill talk about when i'm done with the set. something something magpie archer + sorcerer wanderer duo ^^ actual art notes now!! - the mushrooms on the trees are turkey tail mushrooms! they're harmless. the ones on the forest floor and the ones that people would usually pick however, are death caps. they look like some common non-poisonous mushrooms, but if you eat one you're basically dead. - the fire is green to match with setsuko's! witches/evil characters in movies and media often use green, as well. i thought that'd be fun. the background is purple because it contrasts well with purple - i was going to add animals to the forest at first, but i thought it'd be more impactful if she was alone i also think her fear of ending up by herself is interesting. "what if i move on too fast and they forget? what if i stick around for too long and they grow tired of me? what if they just don't care?" is probably a presence somewhere, deep inside of her mind and she hates it. she wants to burn it and throw the ashes in the sewers her pyromania + comfort lighter are also great. please turn your problems to paper and set them ablaze, masako. you deserve it i really admire your art and how insane you are over her... let us spread the masako takisawa brainworms further together

Kenshin Kamishiro trained 4*, "A Warrior's Burden" @sillystringstar hi bro,, ignore background and its good trust me... this one took a while!! probably going to work on juns next weekend to complete the set // @bobcross1010 @kitchenaidmixer02 @queenoforeos because you would probably want to see your collective shared guy as well. alex when i start on juns you arent gonna see any sneak peaks/wips like you did for the other ones. evil laughter

[casuallyimagining]

Fix You (2)

hybrid!Min Yoongi x female!reader

Summary: When you take in a stray cat, you have no idea he’s secretly a hybrid trying to escape his past. Can you help him heal? Genre: hurt/comfort, angst, slow burn, fluff Word Count: 2,987 Rating: M Warnings (may not appear in every part): minor character is a dick to animals, mentions of a gun, main character injury (non-serious), discussion of physical abuse, emotional abuse, discussion of sexual abuse, discussion of self-harm

Notes: Banner by @birbdae; thanks to @voiceswithoutlips, @taetaesbaebaepsae​, and @hoebii​​ for editing this for me.

Previous | Masterlist | Next

When you woke up, the cat was nowhere to be found, and your pillow was missing. It was just your luck that the random cat you had saved would end up being a kleptomaniac. You sighed and began to get ready for your day. It wasn’t like you could do anything about it. The cat was probably scared and confused, and you couldn’t blame him for wanting to be comfortable.

As you passed your TV stand, you bent down to peer underneath it. Copper eyes stared back at you. You greeted the cat and his tail swished back and forth against the floor, annoyed. So he wasn’t into mornings, then.

Heading into the kitchen, you quickly made yourself a cup of coffee. If the cat wasn’t a morning person, then you would probably get along. You were an early riser, but that was mostly due to insomnia, not because you actually enjoyed being awake.

You brought him the rest of the chicken you had cut up the night before, prepared with his morning dose of the antibiotics. Laying down on the floor, you pushed the plate under the TV stand for him.

He sniffed at the chicken, eyes not leaving your face as he started to eat. His canines were long and pointy, you noticed, and if you paid attention when his mouth was closed, you could barely see the tip of the right one poking out from his lips.

“I’m going to go shopping today to get you some stuff.” The cat didn’t answer. Of course he didn’t. He was a cat. “I know you’re feeling better, but please try not to jump on stuff. You’ll hurt yourself more, and I really can’t afford another weekend trip to the vet.” His copper eyes seemed to soften at that for a moment before hardening back into a glare.

You weren’t sure what you did to make the cat constantly glare at you. Maybe he had a resting grouch face. Maybe he was just uncomfortable in his new surroundings. You hoped that, if nothing else, he would eventually warm up to you. All the pets you’d had in the past had opened up to you right away, although you supposed that was because they were babies when your family had adopted them. You’d never adopted an adult cat before.

“Eat up,” you told him before pushing yourself off the floor. “I’ll be back soon.”

The pet store was larger than you remembered it being. When you were a kid shopping with your mother for your pets, there were only a few departments in the store. There was, of course, sections for cats and dogs, as well as areas for fish, birds, reptiles, and small mammals. Now though, in addition to the old departments, there were additional sections for hybrids of all kinds--there was even a department dedicated to large and exotic hybrids like lions, panthers, giraffes, and elephants.

Hybrids weren’t a new species by any means, but it had only been in the past decade or so that people had fully started to embrace them in society. Before, shops that catered to hybrids were usually small and boutique--hybrids used to only be seen as pets or servants, and ones that lived without ownership were few and far between. But after fighting for and receiving the rights they deserved, hybrids had become more prevalent in society. There was even a hybrid serving in the president’s cabinet, and quite a few serving in other high-ranking government positions.

You wandered through the cat section of the pet store, unsure of what to buy. You had a couple toys in your cart--catnip mice and little springs and balls that had bells in them. You knew the cat was somehow going to act offended by them, but you reminded yourself that he’s a cat, and indoor cats needed something to stimulate their minds.

You also had put some cat shampoo in your cart. The cat was dirty, and you weren’t sure how much blood was going to be caked into his fur under the bandage, so you figured a bath was somewhere in his immediate future.

Sighing, you grabbed a bag of air-dried food. He would probably hate that, too, but you couldn’t keep feeding him raw chicken. For one thing, you couldn’t stand the feel of it, and the less you had to touch the raw meat, the better. But also, chicken was expensive, and while your job paid decently, you weren’t sure how well it could support an all-raw diet for the cat. This air-dried food was turkey and salmon, and would be the next closest thing to raw.

Eventually, you would probably end up getting the cat a cat tree, but you didn’t think it was a good idea right now. With his shoulder injury, he really shouldn’t be climbing or jumping, and a cat tree would only invite that more. So you left the aisle, even though they had a tree that had a little house you knew he would love to hide in.

Before checking out, you stopped by the little kiosk that sold ID tags and collars. You knew he would hate wearing a collar, but if he ever escaped, you wanted to know someone could return him to you. You would ask the vet about microchipping later, but for now, a collar would have to do. Looking at the options, you couldn’t help but laugh. Most of the plain collars were pink or had things like little butterflies on them. A few had bells, which you knew he would find absolutely repulsive, and a couple others had bowties. You considered a dark blue plaid one with a bowtie, but decided against it. As cute as he would look, you knew the cat would probably bite you if you went anywhere near him with it.

You settled on a collar covered in piano keys. It was the plainest one they had in stock that wasn’t bright pink. You grabbed a small, circular tag, too. He would hate it, but at least maybe if you picked the least offensive options, the cat would tolerate wearing a collar.

On the way home, you stopped and grabbed a coffee from the chain cafe down the street from your apartment. You were still a little tired, and when you got home, you were glad for the extra caffeine.

“I’m home, kitty!” you called into the seemingly empty apartment. You hadn’t really been expecting the cat to be anywhere out in the open, but a small part of you had hoped.

Walking into the kitchen, you deposited the couple bags from the pet store on the table. You couldn’t help but feel like something was off. Nothing was broken or in the wrong place that you could see from first glance, but the niggling feeling in the back of your mind wouldn’t go away. Something had been moved in your kitchen. Your mug from your coffee this morning was washed and sat in your drying rack, along with another cup that you had thought you put away and the dish from last night that you had used to feed the cat. You didn’t remember washing the dishes this morning, but you were still a little tired, so maybe you had and just forgot.

You didn’t see anything else out of the ordinary, so you let it go, choosing instead to go find your cat. As expected, you found him under the TV stand. He was panting as if he had just run under there from somewhere else in the house.

“You know you’re allowed to be in other rooms, right?” you asked him softly, pulling the empty plate out so you could take it to the kitchen. “You don’t have to run under here every time I come home.” Copper eyes met yours for a second, and you could see panic in them. Then you saw it. The bandage around his shoulder was gone.

Your brow furrowed in confusion. Dr. Jung’s assistant had wrapped it securely. He must have really been running around the house to not only loosen it, but to dislodge the bandage entirely.

“What were you doing while I was gone, dude?” you questioned. The cat looked terrified. His eyes were large as saucers, his ears flat against his head. His mouth was open in a silent hiss, his long canine teeth on full display. “Are you hurt?” That seemed to catch him off guard. “Are you still bleeding? Can I see?” You reached into your back pocket and pulled out your phone. “You don’t have to come out if you don’t want to,” you said softly, waving your phone in the dark. “But can you at least turn so I can see?”

It took you a second to realize that, again, you were talking to a cat. He wasn’t going to listen to you, despite how human his reactions to you seemed to be. In the second that it took you to remind yourself that your cat is, in fact, a cat, his demeanor changed. His ears were still pressed back against his head, but he seemed less agitated, more resigned. He crawled toward you slowly, the limp almost entirely gone.

When he was out from under the TV stand, he stood fully. You pushed yourself up so you could sit and examine him. As you reached for him, he backed away slightly. His copper eyes met yours for the briefest of seconds before they flicked away, focusing on the floor. He stood still and allowed you to scoop him up into your lap.

“It’s okay,” you soothed, scratching his head gently. “Let me just look at your shoulder.”

You ran your hand over the joint and he froze. For a second, you thought maybe he was going to bolt back under the TV stand. But he sat there stiffly, allowing you to feel for the bite marks and anything that might still be bleeding.

You found nothing. Not even a scab. The only signs of the dog attack yesterday were a ring of indents--scars, you presumed--that ran from his shoulder blades down to his chest and onto his leg. There was no way he had healed that fast.

But you didn’t say that. Instead, you smiled at him. “If you don’t want to wear the bandage any more, you don’t have to,” you said soothingly, scratching at the base of his ear. His copper eyes met yours, and you pulled away at the apprehension in them.

He stepped out of your lap as soon as your hand was away from him. You nodded once, smiling at him. “I’m going to go do some work, kitty. I’ll be in my office if you need anything.”

You were a researcher. Always had been. When you were looking for apartments in the city, you had created spreadsheets and pro/con lists and had spent weeks researching neighborhoods. And when you decided on the right neighborhood, you had debated floor plans, after weeks of second-guessing finally settling on the single floor, three bedroom, two bathroom with the decent sized kitchen and living room.

You hadn’t done any research before taking in the cat. You loved cats, had had several growing up. You knew enough about them to not need to do any research before committing to taking home the stray living near your parents’ house.

Maybe you should have.

Although you weren’t exactly sure how researching could have possibly prevented anything. You pushed it out of your mind, though, choosing instead to focus on your next work project.

Except you couldn’t focus. Your client was a hybrid-owned cafe just outside the city, and you were trying to design their menus. Normally, it wouldn’t take you long at all. They were great clients, and they had given you all the information you needed, but your mind kept drifting to the cat in your living room. You assumed he had crawled back under the TV stand. He seemed to be comfortable enough under there, although clearly he felt comfortable leaving the shadows when you weren’t home.

And then there was the problem of his name. You had no idea what to call him, but you were sure he had a name. Though how you’d figure it out, you had no idea.

You had wanted to watch this movie for months. It had appeared on streaming services around Christmastime, but it was now April, and you still hadn’t had the chance to watch it. You curled up on your sectional in the living room to watch it, a bowl of popcorn sitting beside you. You had turned the lights off in the living room, so the only major source of light was what was coming from the TV, and it was a fairly dark movie.

Though you were invested in the plot, you still scrolled through your phone, your attention divided between social media and what was happening on the television.

Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed a shadow moving under your TV stand. Your cat’s head poked out a second later, copper eyes watching you scroll through your social media. In another second, the rest of his body emerged from the shadows. You forced yourself to watch the movie. You didn’t want to freak him out by watching him. When you glanced back at where he had emerged, he was gone.

The movie was about halfway over when you noticed him again, slinking back into the living room from the hallway. Where he had gone, you had no idea. But he sat for a moment, staring at you from beside the wall. You had grabbed a blanket in the time that he had been gone. Your apartment tended to get chilly at night sometimes--it was old, and the insulation wasn’t the best--and you were a little cold.

Before you knew what was happening, he was up on the couch and in your lap, laying in the valley between your outstretched legs. He paused for a moment, copper eyes meeting yours as if gauging your reaction. In the dim light from the TV, you could see that hint of panic again, as if he was terrified you would shout or push him away. You smiled at him gently, resituating so more of your lap was available and going back to scrolling through your phone.

The cat was apparently satisfied with your reaction, because he readjusted himself, as well, curling up so he was taking up more real estate on your lap. You didn’t mind. His little body put off quite a lot of heat, and from what you could feel of him through the blanket, he was cold, too. Eventually, he settled in, his head rested against your leg beside your free hand, his tail flopped into the crook of your elbow, the tip flicking lightly back and forth.

After a moment, you felt him shift again, and you almost jumped when you felt his head press into your hand. It took you a second, and a few more tentative bumps from him, but you eventually opened your hand and allowed him to press his forehead into your palm. You rubbed your thumb gently over the soft fur of his cheek. He leaned into your touch and you could feel him relaxing. You heard the rumbles of a purr start to stutter in his chest. It wasn’t constant like other cats’--it sounded vaguely like popcorn, crackling and popping at random.

You sighed, resting one hand on his back and continuing to stroke his cheek. He stiffened for a moment and raised his head, wide eyes staring into your face, before he slowly started to relax again.

“I can’t keep calling you kitty,” you said softly when he was comfortable. He didn’t raise his head, but his ear swiveled in your direction to show he was paying attention. “And I’m terrible at names, so you’re going to have to figure out a way to tell me what yours is. Unless you want me to call you something ridiculous like Smudge or Shadow.” The cat grunted. Apparently he didn’t like those names, either. “I didn’t think so.”

Your attention returned to the movie, but you kept petting him. His stuttering purr resumed. He directed your hand by nudging it, up his head and down to his shoulder. He adjusted how he was laying so you could rub where the scars of yesterday’s bite marks were. You massaged the area gently, his purring increasing in volume.

His fur was soft and considerably less dirty than it had been that morning. If you concentrated, he smelled like your shampoo.

“I have to take some stuff back to the pet store tomorrow,” you said finally. “So you’ll have some time alone to do whatever.”

He froze, and despite the movie playing, it was quiet without his purring. His eyes were wide, and he hissed, but aside from his ears flattening, he didn’t move. He was scared--no, he was terrified.

It broke your heart.

“I’m not going to hurt you.” You kept your voice soft and even. “You can stay here for as long as you’d like. I want you to feel comfortable here.”

You sighed. You still felt a little weird talking so seriously with a cat, but his reactions confirmed what your research had told you. You had questions, and you were a little concerned about the logistics of everything, but you had started to come to terms with it.

Him smelling like your shampoo. The dishes being done. The stolen pillow and blanket. The things that were moved ever so slightly. The oddly appropriate reactions to what you were saying. How fast he had healed. Maybe you’d always known. Maybe that’s why you still talked to him like he was a person.

He was a person, more or less.

Your cat was a hybrid.

As always, your feedback is appreciated. Feel free to pop into my ask box with questions or thoughts about the series. I’d love to hear from you!

Previous | Masterlist | Next

Taglist: @min-yus, @melindagrace31, @shrimpmsg, @ghostkat23, @demcreeps, @ggsmashgg, @findingourtreasure, @20emma0, @springbean​, @black-rose-29, @cuteipat, @agustneeds, @deeepvibes, @yzkyzkuniverse, @softbbyg0rl​

[marveldc-imagines-hub]

That One Valentine’s Day Special (Captions)

Anon said: “Hello!! I saw that your wandavision requests are open and I had to request something! I’m so obsessed with Vis right now, it’s very bad. I can’t think of any specific plot ideas, all I know is that I would really love to see some fluffy Vision just head over heals in love with reader. Kisses, cuddles, all that jazz. Thank you so much ❤️❤️❤️”

Anon said: “maybe a request where it’s valentines and the reader and Wanda team up to get really dressed up and make an amazing dinner to surprise Vision, but when he comes home and sees them both he’s so flustered that either like has a shutdown or faints? And then obviously Wanda and the reader panic and spend the evening taking care of him and also teasing him for being so adorable/fainting? Thank you!!!”

A/N: Combined aspects from both of these requests to make an ooey gooey Valentine’s Day special (which got belated because I lost half of the writing when I transferred it from doc to Tumblr post :’D)!

Don’t think this is the type of dressed up you meant but I hope you like it, either way! The type of nightwear I was going for with Wanda was something like this.

Subtitles/Captions Masterlist

Tip Jar

Word count: 7,117

Warnings: Valentine’s Day sap. Lingerie, passionate kissing, and everyone being flirty (nothing graphic). Reader makes a really, really, just terrible pun in order to compliment Wanda. This was edited very late at night, so there might be a few errors.

Tag list: @cyanide-mustard @badasspolygenderfriend (These were the only two on the tag list who confirmed that they wanted to be tagged in everything WandaVision-related; if anyone else on the Subtitles list does, just let me know!)

~~~

“Hey, Wanda?” You hollered to the woman in the other room. You were standing in front of the mirror in the Maximoff bathroom, adjusting the collar of the somewhat too-big shirt you wore.

“Yes, dear?” Your girlfriend hollered back from a couple of rooms away.

“While I definitely get the why we’re doing this,” you continued, tugging the shirt’s shoulders farther to one side, then back to the other, before giving up and moving onto your hair, “with Valentine’s Day and all, you know--”

Wanda piped up, probably to assure you that she was listening more than anything, “Yes, I do.”

You snorted. “--but is there a reason we’re doing so… much?” 

As you spoke, you ran your hands through your hair, ruffling it to give it a bedhead type of look. You faltered a bit when your eyes settled on the ugly scar on your forehead that your hair couldn’t cover without being in a bizarre style. You frowned and dug a finger into the scar tissue, feeling very little other than mild pressure when you did so. 

There was a pause on Wanda’s end. “You don’t think he deserves it, working so hard this past week?”

You reeled back, insecurity forgotten, and quickly left the bathroom. You walked down the hall to where Wanda was working on her own outfit in the bedroom she shared with Vision, rambling away, “No, no, no! I mean no as in no, you’re wrong, not as in he doesn’t deserve what we’re doing. Of course, he does! To be completely honest, he probably deserves it more than anyone in town--aside from yourself, of course--but… For example, we did a lot revolving around food and… Vis doesn’t eat.”

There was another pause and you halted by the closed bedroom door, mainly to pick a rose petal from where it stuck itself to the bottom of your stockinged foot but also because you didn’t want to walk in on your partner.

“But Valentine’s Day revolves around food quite a bit, doesn’t it?” Wanda said from the other side of the door. At this point in your relationship, you could pick up pretty easily how Wanda was feeling by her tone of voice. She spoke thoughtfully, which wasn’t all that concerning, but there was a certain edge to her voice that made you worried; she was going to start overthinking and scrapping the entire idea if you didn’t interfere soon. 

You tilted your head from one side to the other while considering her statement before giving a nod she couldn’t see and responding, “I suppose you’re right there. Lots of holidays do, now that I think about it. Thanksgiving? Turkey. Easter? Candy. Christmas? Just… food in general.”

You glanced around as you spoke. You couldn’t see much of the house from where you stood in the hallway but you knew what to expect when you walked to the main part of the house. All of the house’s lights were off, save for a few lamps that washed the house with what would have been a low, cozy, get-comfortable-before-bed sort of light if Wanda hadn’t used her powers to turn the lightbulbs in said lamps from yellow to a red; because of this change, the dim light gave off a much more romantic energy that fit with the rest of your and Wanda’s decorating. Red, pink, and white rose petals were scattered all across the floor, starting from the front were, where Vision would be when he walked in after work and making a trail to different rooms of the house. One path led to the kitchen and dining area, where you and Wanda had spent a good part of the day preparing various sweet, Valentine’s Day- and romance-themed treats plus dinner and setting up the table with candles and flowers and a pink tablecloth that matched the pink rose petals. Another led to the living room, which was decorated in a similar nature. Thanks to Wanda’s ability to conjure, she was able to quickly clean up the area that was usually hidden under a mess of baby equipment, change the color of the throw pillows and blankets to the correct red and pink theme, and even had “floating” heart decorations that danced across the ceiling on transparent strings; the babies themselves were gone for the night, safe under Agnes’s care once she and you had been able to convince Wanda. Finally, a rose path, accompanied by ceiling hearts, led down the hallway until it made a fading stop at where were you currently stood, leaning next to the bedroom door. The bedroom itself wasn’t decorated and neither of you had really talked about the assumptions that could be made from looking at the trail, but what you had discussed was how many romantic movies Wanda was going to project onto one of the walls after dinner while cuddling would most certainly take place on the couch.

The third path was mainly to guide you down the hallway while Wanda greeted Vision from the kitchen. It was also to lead Vision to go change into his own set of comfy pajamas when you and Wanda would ultimately have to push him to do so after him grumbling about too tired to do so.

Poor thing, you thought while pushing yourself away from the wall. 

Being the company’s fastest and best worker, Vision had become victim to Mr. Hart doubling his workload and as a result, the gentleman had been working like a dog for the entire past week. His days had consisted of getting up way too early only to go into work and be worked to the bone, then come home and relieve Wanda of the babies--regardless of her assuring him that she’d be fine while he rested--until he passed out on the couch sometime later into the night. You’d been surprised, after learning of his synthezoid identity, that he’d need to sleep at all but you supposed anyone would need to recharge after a day like that.

You, on the other hand, had racked up some vacation days and, after a chat with Wanda about the upcoming romantic holiday, decided to add an extra day to your weekend so the two of you could do something nice for her husband. You’d probably regret this on Monday but for now, you were just happy to have spent the day working with Wanda and were hoping the rest of the night went well. 

Speaking of the woman, Wanda had been quiet for some time now, other than the sounds of rustling fabric. You decided now was a good time as any to get involved before she decided that she should do something completely different and cause all the previous work to go to waste, so you knocked. After getting a verbal invitation, you strolled in, only for a sharp inhale to almost propel you back to slam into the doorframe.

Wanda was standing in front of a full-length mirror against the far wall of the bedroom, anxiously fiddling with what little clothing she had on. She wore what looked like a bathing suit but was made out of a sheer, body-hugging, baby pink fabric and embellished with a subtle pattern of roses. Her back was turned to you but you could see from the mirror’s reflection that the piece still left plenty to the imagination with a more opaque version of the same fabric keeping her chest, the bit of fabric held snugly between her thighs, and even an upsidedown V-shaped panel that was framed by silky white bands and reached from the middle of her torso to the lower part of her hips covered. This lovely piece, clothing an even lovelier woman, was paired with similarly colored stockings of the same fabric, minus the rose pattern, and you were both surprised and amused by the addition of a string of pink pearls around her neck and one wrist with matching earrings and a pair of white low heels with a bow on the toe strap. Wanda’s hair was styled in loosely curled waves, making it look shorter than it actually was, and pushed back with a headband that could be mistaken for a minimal tiara, which was also embellished with pink-tinted pearls.

You knew that you were staring, flushed, and with eyes almost bulging out of their sockets--you knew only because you could catch part of your own reflection in the mirror, not because you could feel anything other than goosebumps-inducing tingles travel across your body--but it took Wanda laughing softly and catching your eye in the mirror to pull your slacked jaw off the floor and close your suddenly dry mouth. You eventually also tried to speak but not much other than a stammering “Uhhh…” came out and you gave up, instead choosing to scrub your hands over your face so you would at least look away.

Then Wanda dared to ask, “So, do I look okay?”

You stared at her again but this time it was one of disbelief. “I’m sorry, what?”

Wanda rolled her eyes and chuckled again at your utter belief before nervously running her hands down along a perfect set of curves. You fully believed she had no intention of torturing you by doing so but here she was, doing just that. If it hadn’t been for the awkward look on her face, makeup-free except for light lipstick and a little mascara, your gaze probably would have stayed with the path her hands made over her stomach and down to rest on her hips. You watched her gaze jump worriedly from one part of her body to the other instead.

“Look,” she continued, “I know I look okay, I know I look fine--”

Fine? Only fine? If Wanda asked you to strip naked and run through Westview while screaming her praises, you would do so without a second thought. Well, you probably would have done it regardless of what she was wearing but you wouldn’t be complaining about the extra bit of help.

“--but ever since the twins were born, I feel a little… hmph… wearing something like this.”

While you couldn’t possibly fathom how she could see herself as anything but one of the most beautiful living creatures ever, but you’d also figured out quite a while ago that she didn’t exactly see herself the same way you did. You chewed the inside of your cheek a bit before walking over and wrapping your arms around her; her own hands settled to rest on top of yours. You rested your chin on her shoulder and met her gaze in the mirror one last time.

“I suppose even goddesses have their insecure days, huh?”

Wanda laughed and rolled her eyes so hard you were vaguely worried about them rolling back into her skull. She lightly slapped your arms but still leaned back into your embrace as she scoffed, “Be quiet.”

“Wanda,” you said, “you had kids. You still look great. You look so good. So, so, so good. Insanely good. Earth-shakingly good. So pretty. Very gorgeous. Amazingly foxy. Incredibly stellar. Your mom body? Could demolish Aphrodite in a beauty pageant.”

You rambled on a bit longer before Wanda was smacking your arms again. She looked more at ease now, though, completely relaxed in your arms with her head leaning into the crook of your shoulder and one ankle loosely crossed over the other. 

“Mom body.” She snorted. “Please, enlighten me further about this mom body I have.”

You quickly shook your head and gave her reflection a warning look. “Can’t. If I say much more, it’ll upset the gods. Every single one of them. I’ll be thrown into the pits for all the sinful things I’d have said.”

Wanda’s head fell back as she laughed again; you felt the tickle of her hair against your exposed neck as you grinned against her shoulder. When she settled again, you gave her a serious look, moved your lips to kiss the shell of her ear, then muttered, “But let’s just say you’re a foxy mama in absolutely every sense of the word.”

The woman in your arms erupted with laughter once more, though this time it was short and accompanied by a gentle slap to the cheek. Then her hand rested there, holding your head close as she leaned her forehead partially against yours. 

“You and my husband,” she said with a little shake of her head, “and those ridiculous puns of yours.”

    You nodded slightly in agreement, then tilted your head to peck her cheek. “That one really was just…”

    “Awful?”

    “Yeah, no, not good.” You chuckled and reached a hand up to poke her cheek. “Made ya smile though.”

    Wanda hummed, squinting at herself in the mirror, then huffed. “I suppose.”

    There were a few moments of the two of you just holding each other and soaking up each other’s presence.

    Then Wanda just had to ask again, “Do you really think I look okay?”

    It was your turn to roll your eyes. “Wanda! You’re so pretty! You’re so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so--”

    “You tell me I’m pretty all the time,” she pointed out.

    “I have yet to be wrong,” you countered.

    She looked herself over again. Tilting her head and glancing up at you from under her lashes, she said, “You could call me sexy.”

    “I could,” you agreed, “Don’t want to make you uncomfortable though.”

    Wanda raised a brow. “Did I not just say you could?”

    You snorted. “Was my foxy mama joke not enough? Do you know what havoc me doing so would release onto the world? Would you want the gods to reject me because of my filthy language?” You leaned your head into her neck while keeping your eyes on hers. You waggled your eyebrows and lowered your voice. “‘Cause I’ll do it.”

    Wanda made a face at you, scrunching up her nose and pursing her lips in the special, incredibly cute way that only she could. Then she smiled and ruffled your hair slightly. “I’m sure they wouldn’t mind you calling me sexy once.”

    “Oh, nay,” you insisted, “if it happens once, it shall happen a million types! An unholy, unhinged, affectionate monster shall be released from its mortal prison!”

    Wanda hummed thoughtfully and made a show of tapping her chin and tilting her head. “Okay, deal.”

    You rolled your eyes and smiled. Giving her cheek another quick smooch, you said simply back, “‘Kay, you’re sexy.”

    She smiled back at you and did a single clap. “Yay.”

    “And, hey,” you said, tapping the scar on your forehead, “even if you weren’t a level of beauty that matched an immortal otherworldly being--impossible--at least you don’t have a scar on your face.”

    You saw Wanda’s gaze soften in the mirror before she twisted around in your arms to face you. She gently took your face in her hands and your eyes fluttered shut as she leaned up to kiss you directly on said scar.

    “I like the scars,” she said softly, “It means you survived something, even if you don’t know what it was, and I’m happy that you did.”

    Your eyes blinked back open. “Why?”

    “You wouldn’t be here for me otherwise.” 

    You huffed out a little breath, somewhat involuntarily, and were suddenly very aware of the fact that you two were practically tangled around each other now. You squished your nose against hers in a nuzzle and said in a lower tone, “Lucky you then.”

    She dropped her hands from your face to wrap her arms around your neck. She matched your tone and bumped her nose back against yours, tilting her head a bit. “Very lucky.”

    It was almost like a mutual decision when your lips crashed against each other. 

Having been prone to the feeling of floaty dizziness as a result of your migraines, the feeling itself wasn’t particularly jarring. What replaced the usual undercurrent of pulsing pain, however, was what made this dizziness feel heavenly instead of hellish. When you kissed Wanda, it was like immediate intoxication but instead of booze, it was the taste of the gloss on her lips and the strawberry flavor that still lingered on her tongue from your cooking session earlier that day and the mix of citrusy sweetness from her perfume and shampoo that made you think of candied orange slices whenever you inhaled. You’d always be too busy to mentally describe it while in the moment, far too concentrated on committing whatever part of Wanda’s body that you were touching to memory via your grazing fingertips and adding new scents, words, feelings, images, and whatever else to the catalog of things that reminded you of her in your head, but when you thought about the love-drunk dizziness that followed the initial intoxication after the fact, you equated it to being a little tipsy and stumbling into a warm home. Only this time, home was a woman whose arms and mouth kept drawing you back for one more kiss, and then five more, and the thing that made you tipsy was the way the air crackled with invisible electricity and magic, and the look in her eyes when your eyes fluttered open after parting. 

While time seemed to slow to a stop during your and Wanda’s moment, it hadn’t actually done so at all. This was proven when you heard the front door begin to open, causing you and Wanda to practically leap away from each other. She stared at you with wide, startled eyes and you couldn’t help but note your handiwork; her entire face and neck were flushed a deep red, her hair was significantly messier than it had been previously, that the lip color she’d been wearing had been partially transferred to your mouth.

The admiration could only last a moment. “You’re supposed to be in the kitchen.”

“I’m supposed to be in the kitchen,” Wanda repeated. “My lipstick is all over your face.”

You brushed a thumb over your bottom lip and it came away with a glossy pink. “Your lipstick is on my face.”

Wanda stood in front of you, suddenly frozen except for flitting eyes and hands grasping at the air while she tried to think of something. Then, with a couple of snaps of her fingers, she remembered her magic a moment later. “Oh, I can just-- You look amazing, the shirt’s a nice touch. See you out there!” She snapped once more and disappeared in a puff of red smoke just as you heard the front door swing open and Vision’s voice drifted down the hallway.

“Darling, I’m ho-- Oh.”

Then Wanda’s voice also bounced back your way from where she was probably now perched in the kitchen. Her tone was one part frazzled, two parts cheery, and five parts flirty teasing as she spoke. “Hiya, honey! Whaddya think?”

You drew your attention from their voices to the mirror that you now stood in directly in front of. The outfit you wore wasn’t nearly as polished as Wanda’s, but it had its intimate charm. While the two of you both wore stockings, that was where the similarities stopped. Your stockings were a sheer brownish-black and you wore no form of shoes with them nor any other accessories aside from your lightly ruffled mess of hair. In contrast to Wanda’s overall body-shaping attire, the pair of high-waisted silky shorts that you wore were flowy and loose, and instead of the shorts’ matching tank top with uncomfortable lace straps, you wore one of Vision’s pajama shirts that was a similar shade of red with vertical yellow and dark brown stripes. Posing a couple of different ways for yourself in the mirror, you were pleased to find the red and yellow were an almost match to Vision’s skin and the glowing gem in his forehead; with a little more pondering, you were a tad upset that the shirt you were wearing had yellow stripes instead of yellow spots.

If it had spots, you thought, I could look like a strawberry with a thigh-high chocolate dip.

Pleased with your look otherwise, you aimlessly moved about the bedroom before hovering around the doorway where you could almost make out the rest of Vision and Wanda’s conversation. The plan in place was that Wanda was going to give Vision the itinerary for the night--gifts and cards, dinner, because there was food to be eaten whether Vision ate any or not, an indoor movie theater that Wanda would magically whip up, and the rest of the night spent in romantic snuggling bliss--and then would give you a cue. When the actual process of getting the gifts came about, you were to bring said items to the living room, being somewhat of a surprise gift for Vision in your own right. You glanced towards the bed, where a white clothing box wrapped in a red ribbon sat with a trio of cards, one each from you and Wanda and one Wanda had made on behalf of the twins, who were still too young to do much on their own.

You couldn’t be sure whether it was because Wanda had slipped up and mentioned you--it was much harder to hear them from the other part of the house after their loud introductions finished--or if Vision, clever and curious man that he was, had caught on to your and Wanda’s plan already and decided to uncover it ahead of time. Either way, you suddenly caught a glimpse of Vision turning down the hallway, hovering a few inches off the ground to probably preserve the rose petal trail underneath his feet, and jumped away from the doorway before he could see you. While you couldn’t quite make out what Wanda was saying, you could hear a slight strain in her voice as she tried to get Vision to back down from his cause, to no avail. You only had a few moments to think of something and you decided to hop onto the bed and get comfortable in a casual sitting position, moving the small stack of Valentine’s Day goodies and looking coolly off to the side just before Vision floated into the room.

The soft thud of Vision landing on his feet your attention back over to the doorway and you saw him standing there rigid in his work suit, his gaze roaming over you before respectfully glancing away--only to be slowly dragged back less than a minute later. After watching this process continue a couple more times, you decided to tease him.

“Oh, hey there, crimson toaster oven,” you quipped nonchalantly, reaching up to toy with a stray piece of hair as you did, “how was work?”

Vision’s eyes settled on yours as you watched him with a cocked head. You expected some sort of reply, and for a moment he seemed like he was about to speak. Instead, though, he settled into an almost completely frozen state, jaw clenching slightly.

At first, you were amused. Then you realized he was quite literally frozen, nothing moving aside from the whirling of gear-like shapes in his irises, and your facade broke down a bit.

“Vis?” you questioned, sitting up straighter and moving the Valentine’s Day gifts aside, “you okay?”

No response.

You frowned and got up to walk over to him. “Um, Wanda?”

The Sokovian woman appeared a moment later shimmying around Vision’s form to stand next to you.

“Is he okay?” you asked.

“Oh, dear,” Wanda murmured. You watched as her gaze turned red and she looked him over, using her powers to check that his internal functions were still working properly. Eventually, her gaze stopped at his face and after squinting at him, Wanda said, “Ah. [Y/N], it appears we broke him.”

“I’m sorry?” you choked, “Broke him?”

Wanda seemed much less worried than you felt about the implications of Vision being some form of broken. She instead smiled and stepped up to him, giving you a simple “Yep” before pressing her fingers to his temples. Her eyes flashed red again and a second later Vision’s body sagged into a much more human position. “There we go.”

You blinked and watched as Vision shook himself out, flapping his hands and then rotating his arms and neck with a grumble. 

“Ah,” he said, “much better.”

You eyed him. “Everything’s chill then? His gears got, ah, de-gummed, so to speak?”

Wanda snickered. She was now tucked against Vision’s side and helping him shimmy out of his jacket.

Vision seemed to remember where he was and what was going on because his eyes flitted from Wanda to you and back. When he settled a bit more, he looked at you both in turn, his gaze making a slow, deliberate path down both your and Wanda’s bodies as he took in what each of you wore. Finally, his eyes jolted back up to meet yours, and he responded in a low, gravelly voice, “Well, right now, I’m doing absolutely marvelously.”

You grasped that everything was back on track again and a smirk graced your face. “Well,” you said, clapping your hands together and turning back towards the bed, “as long as the short-circuit didn’t fry anything, the step of the night is gifts.”

Then you were being dragged back to Vision’s side by your wrist and he had an arm around both your and Wanda’s waists. “Now, just hold on there, [Y/N]. Shouldn’t I get to spend some time with my lovely partners, especially after seeing all the effort they’ve put in? Besides, I haven’t even gotten to compliment you about your looks.” He paused and pressed a kiss to Wanda’s temple, then nuzzled the side of your neck. When he moved his head away again, he eyed the way your shirt hung loosely off your shoulders. “Is that my shirt?”

You and Wanda shared an amused glance. She’d told you earlier that day about the anniversary-Hart family dinner mishap she and Vision had had when they’d first moved to Westview, the same day you’d met the couple, and how Vision and the Harts had come home to Wanda wearing an intimate nightdress that had made Vision more than a little flustered; the story is what sparked the idea for the evening’s current attire. She ignored his comment about you wearing his clothes and decided to nudge him back to the plan as hand, brushing a hand over the suit jacket now hanging from her arm. “I don’t know about that, honey, your eyes were certainly saying something.”

Vision pouted and hummed, probably trying to come up with another reason to keep hugging you and Wanda close to his body. After a moment, he chirped, “Ah, well! I brought you each something and something for the boys, and I left everything out in the living room. We can’t open gifts without all of them, what a pity. We might as well--”

“I have an idea.” Wanda interrupted. When you looked from Vision to her, she was still smiling but her eyes sparked with a playful warning. She freed herself from Vision’s hold, much to the tall man’s dismay, and walked over to the bed. She picked up the cards and tucked them under the arm that also held Vision’s jacket, then brought the clothing box over and held it out to you. “How about I go and make sure the food is warmed up and the table is set, then get all the cards and things into one place while, [Y/N], you give Vision the one gift he should still have.”

You raised a brow as you took the box from her and watched her saunter to the door, consciously moving out of Vision’s range. “You don’t want to see him open it?”

“I saw you open one I bought for you, you get to see the one you bought him,” Wanda said simply. “And I have a feeling that we’re better off if we’re not all in the same room until things get back on track, Vision might run the risk of shutting down again.”

You gasped dramatically and pressed your free hand to your cheek. Looking at Vision with wide eyes, you whispered, “How will I warm my bagels?”

Vision narrowed his eyes and made a grumbling sound from so deep in his chest you could feel the rumble where you were still held against him. Said sound and Vision’s overall reaction so far made you perfectly happy with the idea of the night derailing a bit off course, but you knew how much of a stickler Wanda could be when she made a plan and this was just as much a night for her as it was for Vision or you. 

With no further objections, Wanda walked out of the room. The heels she wore gave her a sashaying step and neither you nor Vision were particularly upset as the two of you watched her go. Then the door was shut and you two were alone. 

“So,” Vision said slowly as he turned his attention fully to you, “this is what you’ve been up to instead of going to work today.”

“It is indeed,” you confirmed, “and before you say anything else, I know full well what I’ll be getting into when I go in on Monday.”

“I hope so. You’ll be working harder than I have all week.”

You hummed and chewed on your lip as you thought. “Maybe… I could just… quit my job…”

“Hah!” Vision laughed and waggled a finger at you. “No, no, no, no, no. If I have to endure it, then so do you.”

You grinned and turned away from his finger as if to avoid his complaint. He chuckled and tried to catch your eye, rambling away about Oh, the work we shall both do, but you merely twisted away further, feigning beautiful, blissful ignorance. You even went so far as blocking Vision’s face from your sight with the box you held, which made Vision break off briefly to laugh again.

“--and then, maybe someday you will come home,” Vision continued, catching you in his arms again and tugging you close to him, “and see both of your partners, looking very fetching and being even more wonderful than usual because they’ve set up and entire romantic evening, not only because it’s a romantic holiday but because they specifically wanted to plan something to help you relax after a particularly busy week.” He paused, then added, “And it might even be a little better for you than it will be for me because you actually get to eat the food that’s taken up the entire kitchen.”

You tittered, tilted your head in mock thought even though Vision couldn’t see it, and then lowered your chipboard shield just far enough for your eyes to poke out from over it. “Mm, now that does appealing. Just one question though.”

“Of course, darling.”

You waggled your brows at him. “Which outfit will you be wearing, Wanda’s or mine?”

Vision smirked just slightly but it was enough to set off a volcanic eruption of heat throughout your entire body. You felt his fingers suddenly brushing against yours as he started to gently pry his gift out of your hands.

He said, “Depends on what’s in the box.”

He snagged the box from your hands, revealing your blushing face, but instead of opening it right away, his arm moved around your waist to be with the other once more. He pressed his forehead against yours and you felt a different sort of warmth as the golden gem in his forehead touched your skin. He tilted his head closer still to nuzzle his nose against yours then--

You quickly turned your head away again, flashing him a wicked grin when he stared at you, dumbfounded. You draped your now free arms loosely around his neck, fingered brushing lightly against his neck and fiddling with the collar of his button-up shirt. You shuffled closer to him to eliminate what little space left there was between your body and his, looked him in the eye, and teased, “Careful now, Mr. Maximoff. Wouldn’t want to knock another screw loose in that gorgeous, handsome head of yours.”

Vision’s low chuckle vibrated in his chest, feeling almost like a purr against your own body.

“Or,” you added, “knock one too many screws in?”

“[Y/N].”

“Wind the gears too tight?”

“[Y/N].”

You looked at him innocently; the irritated scowl on his face was contradicted by the mischievous twinkle in his pretty blue eyes. “I can keep going.”

“Oh, I’m very aware of that,” said Vision in that grumbling voice that would probably make you implode every time if it were his regular speaking voice, “but we are never going to get out of this room.”

“Interesting hypothesis,” you said with a very serious nod. “You are welcome to test it or stop me at any time. Now, where was I?”

It took a smirk and a raised brow to kick Vision back into gear but then you were grabbing his face and laughing against his mouth as he all but threw himself at you.

Kissing Vision was quite different than kissing Wanda, although no less addictive. Wanda’s kisses always felt needy but not in the way that one would think. Her kisses always felt like she had been lost up until the very moment your lips would touch hers, and then she was finding refuge and trying to absorb every bit of warmth and comfort that came from the way her mouth melded against yours before the kiss ended and she was alone and lost again. She almost always felt soft and sweet against you but you could feel a wild, restrained power brewing just underneath, and her power seemed to draw out and entangle itself with a power of your own, whatever that power was; the kisses never seemed to last long enough for you to figure that piece out.

When you kissed Vision, you could never get the idea that you were kissing someone not totally human out of your head, but in the best way. One of your favorite things to do whenever you kissed him was to run your hands over his skin and explore every single uniquely intricate thing about him, like the way his skin somehow felt soft and dense at the same time and how it was just slightly textured with lines and grooves that felt inhuman or the way that he didn’t really have a heartbeat or a pulse but rather a gentle constant rumbling of whatever gave him life doing its job, and sometimes this rumbling would jolt or slow depending on where you focused your ministrations. No matter his current state of being--exhausted, flustered, distressed--he was always strong and steady under your hands like he was ready to catch you if you suddenly misstepped or fly you to safety at a moment’s notice should the need arise. You couldn’t help equating the way his mouth worked against yours with the phrase “built to please”; he was always curious and searching in the way his hands and mouth roamed, and he seemed to get the most pleasure when he figured out exactly what you needed and did that--and he was much more often than not oh so very right. 

While Wanda felt wild, Vision felt grounding. When you were kissing Wanda, you were so focused on her body and yours and the energy that wrapped the two of you up in a magical cocoon that you felt like you could start bursting at the seams at any moment. Kissing Vision got you much more out of your head, to the point where you were merely exploring him as much as he was you, which led to the occasional knocking of teeth or finding a ticklish spot that caused the kiss to break into giggles and teasing; maybe you would go back to kissing or maybe the two of you would slip into a conversation so seamlessly that you wouldn’t even notice until a couple of hours had already passed. 

You often wondered if, when you weren’t around and your partners kissed each other, if either of them felt the same thing that you did. You wondered even more often how Wanda and Vision felt kissing you.

This time, though, it was Wanda’s voice from a couple of rooms away, muffled but noticeable, that finally broke the two of you apart. 

“Any day now,” she hollered, although there was no trace of irritation in her tone. “It’s not like we only have a few hours left to celebrate Valentine’s Day or anything.”

Vision’s face scrunched up and he eyed the wall that separated the kitchen and bedroom via another room in between. “Mm, she’s got a point.”

You pursed your lips and squinted at the wall as if you would see red magic permeating it if you did so for long enough. “Do you think she X-rayed us?”

Your partner let out a short little chortle as he disentangled himself from you and looked over the box he’d managed to hang onto during your kissing session. “Even if she did, not like it’s going to be any different once we’re all in the same room together.”

“Good point,” you said. “Mm, more kisses.” You were still curious, though, so you hollered back to Wanda, “Hey, magical girl, did ya see me kiss your husband?”

All you got was a laugh back, which had you smiling. 

Then you turned back to Vision, who was toying with the box’s bow, and said, “Alright, Vis, happy Valentine’s Day. Now give me your tie and your pants.”

You and Vision joined Wanda in the dining area shortly, Vision now dressed in a dark blue set of silky pajamas that matched your own shorts of the same shimmery fabric. Wanda had lit the candles not only at the dinner table but also around the rest of the house and she’d set proper places for three at the dinner table, although only two of the places had been served with simple dinner and various sweet, gaudy treats. After the three of you sat, Wanda gave Vision his cards: a beautifully designed one with a poem on the front and a lengthy handwritten letter on the inside from Wanda, a handmade one with bad Valentine’s Day puns and flustered ramblings all over it from you, and a “hand-drawn” one from Tommy and Billy that had really been drawn childishly by Wanda again as the babies were still too young to do so themselves. As he’d mentioned earlier, Vision had gifts of his own, which included a Valentine’s Day cupcake of your favorite flavor that he had snuck from work for you, cards and flowers for each of you, and a pair of inversely colored, Valentine’s Day themed stuffed puppies for the twins. With Tommy and Billy mentioned, Vision questioned their whereabouts and was surprised that Wanda had even let them out of her sight, though somewhat appreciative.

Dinner was next and went fairly quickly. You and Wanda ate a late dinner while the three of you conversed, mainly about Vision’s day and overall week but also you and Wanda explaining how you’d planned and prepared for the date without Vision being any the wiser. Vision made a comment that he, as an incredibly smart individual with a very expansive range of knowledge, should have noticed something sooner, which led to another bout of teasing from primarily you about how he’d fried his batteries when he saw his partners dressed up in pretty clothing and one of his shirts. Then topic conversations bounced around aimlessly for the rest of the time until both you and Wanda had cleaned your plates and even helped yourselves to some of the other goodies. Vision absolutely refused to let either of you do cleanup work, so you convinced Wanda to go change into something a little comfier--“At least take off those pearls and heels. Don’t really mind the rest of the outfit, though.”--and then went over to prepare the living room for movies by bringing over a few more treats to snack on, cleaning off an area for Wanda to magically project movies on the wall without clutter, and turning the couch into less of a decorative scene and more of a nest of red, white, and pink pillows and blankets.

Finally, the three of you settled onto the couch with Vision in the middle. That wouldn’t last for long, though, as you each grabbed a blanket or pillow and shifted yourselves into a big, fluffy, snuggle pile. You and Wanda managed to end up squished between Vision’s arms, where both of you could comfortably rest your heads on his chest. You could also slip an arm around Wanda and absentmindedly run your fingertips underneath the hem of the pajama shirt she now wore--another of Vision’s; it was a light blue and white striped button-down--and over the rose patterns of the sheer fabric hugging her hips. Instead of starting the movies right away, the three of you laid in comfortable silence for a while, enjoying each other’s company.

Vision briefly had to unwrap his arms to stretch and yawn, the yawn something that wasn’t entirely necessary for him. After placing them back, he murmured, “We don’t normally celebrate these types of things, do we, Wanda?”

Wanda’s eyes fluttered open; you had been watching her lay in quiet, cozy peace and she smiled sweetly at you when she caught you. “Goodness, no. We’ve proven time and time again we’re not exactly the remembering type when it comes to holidays. Holidays, events--”

“Anniversaries,” you offered with a little grin. “Especially those that coincide with meetings with bosses.”

Vision groaned softly. “A minor disaster.”

“Ended well though,” Wanda pointed out.

“And provided the idea for this whole thing,” you added.

Vision hummed thoughtfully and you felt his hand run down your back. “That so?”

“You getting flustered over sexy nightwear?” you said. “What potential.”

Wanda snickered. “What potential indeed. We broke the man.”

“Well,” Vision grumbled, his arms tightening slightly around both of you, “I assure you I’m doing fine now.”

You whispered into his chest, “Only because Wanda put on a shirt.”

Your trio broke into tired chuckles, which then faded into warm silence. It continued for a few moments before Vision pointed out that the movie-watching part of the night didn’t necessarily need to happen.”

That you sitting up and reaching for a movie list you’d compiled much earlier in the day.

“We must watch at least one movie,” you demanded, “and that movie is Grease.”

[victoriareyloficlists]

12 April 2021 Additions to Reylo Fluff

These fics have been added to the Fluff lists located in the following lists:

Fluff Part 1 Titles A-G

Fluff Part 2 Titles H-M

Fluff Part 3 Titles N-S

Fluff Part 4 Titlez T-Z

Zombie Run by OptimisticBeth (AO3 2018  Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: During a charity run, Rey is relentlessly pursued by a zombie.) The Road Taken by gogoburritos (AO3 2020  Rated M Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey pulls a prank on her housemate Ben. She doesn't expect it to turn out so well.) Loose Change by spicytofuuuu (AO3 2020  Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: "I ate your pizza. It was a desperate move. I'm sorry. Not proud of myself. Here is $4." An Oh-My-God-They-Were-Roommates, They-Have-One-Single-Shared-Brain-Cell fic.) just say you love me by darthswift13 (AO3 2021  Rated M Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: In which Rey gets drunk on Saturday nights and confesses her true feelings for her roommate Ben, only to forget on Sunday mornings. Will Rey ever be able to confess her feelings when sober?) r/Relationships by elle_reads (AO3 2020  Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben's new roommate moves in just before a shelter-in-place order is issued. It's just the two of them—and Reddit, of course.) The Sublet by javajunkie (AO3 2020  Rated M Complete, 5 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey and Rose sublet their spare room to Ben Solo.) Knock Me Down by commandercrouton (AO3 2019  Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben gets a concussion thanks to Rey.) Love in the Language of Sweaters by SaintHeretical (AO3 2019  Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Corporate executive Ben Solo mocks holiday sweaters until he sees the delivery girl wear them.) You Need a Tutor by castles_and_crowns (AO3 2018  Rated T Complete, 28 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey is an engineering student who finds herself struggling with calculus. Desperate, she goes to the math tutoring center on campus for help. Meanwhile, Ben Solo is a grad student who's required to work a certain amount of hours in the math tutoring center. When Ben reluctantly offers to help Rey with her work, a relationship forms between them that neither are expecting.) Five Times That Ben Saved Rey's Valentine's Day & How She Forever Saved His by AnneAnna (AO3 2021  Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben makes a confession in his wedding speech: He knew he was going to marry Rey when he and Rey were 4 years old and she gave him a Valentine she made and colored herself. And 21 years later, he still has that Valentine.) Newspaper Hearts by Celia_and (AO3 2021  Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: “She made her Valentine’s cards. She tore hearts out of newspaper and glued them onto used envelopes and painstakingly wrote each child’s name. She probably spent days making them. And you know what she wrote on mine?” He doesn’t need to read it to know what it says, so he looks down at her instead, and the hand on her heart and the tears in her eyes. “Ben: You are OK. Rey.”) When the party ends by Blueyedgurl (AO3 2021  Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey gets wasted at a frat party. Ben finds her, puts her in his room, where she's safe. Rey wakes in the morning after Ben comes out of the shower and nakedness ensues.) Fleeced by Blueyedgurl (AO3 2020  Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: AU where Rey is a mechanic and Ben is her grumpy client. Ben is car shopping and asks her to pretend to be his girlfriend so the dealer won't screw him over.) My Sandwich by Blueyedgurl (AO3 2020  Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Someone took Ben's turkey sandwich at work, he is infuriated and eager for revenge, until he finds out it was Rey then those feelings no longer exist.) Sleepyhead by Blueyedgurl (AO3 2020  Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben, a mere himbo, tucks a stray hair behind Rey's ear in class. He knows he deserves the hot coffee in her hand to be thrown in his face and yet he gets a date. ) When You Know It by Blueyedgurl (AO3 2020  Rated E Complete, 2 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben finds out his roommate Rey has never had someone to celebrate valentine's with, so he sends her 25 roses, one for every year she's been alone, in attempt to make her feel better.) Port in the storm by Blueyedgurl (AO3 2020  Rated E Complete, 2 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey pretends to be afraid of thunderstorms so she has an excuse to sleep next to Ben. Ben figures it out when he races home early after seeing thunder, fearing Rey will be crying alone curled up in a ball, only to find her totally chill and eating ice cream.) Neighborly by Blueyedgurl (AO3 2020  Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey and her son move into a new apartment and meets her new neighbor Ben and his cute dog.) Tinder and Cinder by Blueyedgurl (AO3 2020  Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey joins tinder after a long long dry spell due to her flatmate Kylo's derision, they argue about why and in a fit of jealousy Kylo screams out 'use me instead.') Traditions gotta start somewhere by Blueyedgurl (AO3 2020  Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Christmas Tree vignettes of Rey and Ben over the course of their relationship.) All of my wishes came true with you by Blueyedgurl (AO3 2021  Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Fantasy AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey works on a wishfarm for Plutt. One day after she's out of wishes, she catches the star of a man who wishes for an end to his loneliness. She pockets it and after a particularly rough day she grants it with herself.) Knot It by MotherofScavengers (AO3 2021  Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: When Omega Rey’s heat starts early, the Alpha friend who agreed to assist her is nowhere to be found. When she unexpectedly meets Ben, the delicious smelling Alpha offers his help...and his knot.) It's You by SpaceWaffleHouse (AO3 2021  Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben and Rey have been costars for years when the time comes for them to film their first kissing scene. Neither of them ever expected their soul marks to appear in the process.) Through the Years by castles_and_crowns (AO3 2018  Rated T Complete, 10 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben Solo and Rey Jakkson meet on the playground as children under unusual circumstances and quickly become best friends. This fic follows them through the years, showing glimpses of their friendship as it slowly progresses into something more.) I Hate You by orphan_account (AO3 2018  Rated M Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben has been in love with Rey for two years and so when she storms into his office he finally decides he can't keep it in any longer.) In Small Packages by DyadamDriver (AO3 2018  Rated G Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: It was then that Ben realised three things. 1. He had never had a cat in his life. 2. He had no idea what these little things ate. 3. He had a crippling crush on his neighbour.) ignorance of etiquette by blessedreylo (AO3 2020  Rated E Complete, 2 Chapters, Regency AU, Quick Synopsis: Lady Rey Kenobi lives a life of pristine comfort and luxury on her family's estate in Chesire with her parents Lord Obi-Wan Kenobi and Lady Satine Kenobi. When they receive word that an old family friend, Lord Benjamin Solo, is coming to visit, Lady Rey is reminded of how he tormented her as a child. She decides that she will prove herself not the same girl she once was in more ways than one.) heaven in hiding by blessedreylo (AO3 2021  Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: They say it's impossible for a guy and girl to be "just friends", but Rey and Ben had managed to discredit that throughout their decade long friendship. What they both have is special, that people would often arrive at the conclusion the two were made for each other. He's her safe haven, her rock. She gives him a sense of clarity and direction. Ben and Rey know each other more than anyone ever possibly could. Therefore on Valentine's Day, their friends decided to secretly set them up together on a blind dinner date.) a quiet storm by blessedreylo (AO3 2020  Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Rey gets off to Kylo Ren, a popular audio erotica account online. She hasn’t been on a date in so long until her friend Rose sets her up on a blind date with her boyfriend's coworker, Ben. They seem to be hitting it off and finding that they have a lot in common, but she can’t help but think that he sounds so...familiar.) key to the kingdom by blessedreylo (AO3 2020  Rated E Complete, 12 Chapters, Princess Diaries AU, Quick Synopsis: Most girls get a drunk weekend in Vegas for their 21st birthday, but Princess Rey Kenobi gets the chance to rule the country of Alderaan. But the only way she can become Queen is if she marries a man in 30 days, or the throne goes to the selfish (and annoyingly attractive) usurper Lord Benjamin Solo. Will Rey be able to ascend to the throne or will it all just become a royal pain in the ass?) fueled by fire by blessedreylo (AO3 2020  Rated E Complete, 2 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Ben annoys the hell out of Rey when he tries to write passive aggressive notes about where she leaves her stuff. Rey pisses Ben off by being loud and picking a fight whenever she wants. Being neighbors for the last five months has been interesting to say the least. Their little rivalry comes to a crescendo when their hate for each other turns into another kind of passion.) 1 April Fool by Maloreiy (AO3 2021  Rated T Complete, One-Shot, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: "Honk! Act like you know me! My name is Ben!" Rey sees the sign on the car when she pulls up to the grocery store, and decides to play along. The giant, surly man, apparently named Ben, is not amused.) when I look to you by blessedreylo (AO3 2020  Rated M Complete, 7 Chapters, Harry Potter AU, Quick Synopsis: Best friends since Year Three, Gryffindor's Ben Solo and Rey Niima navigate their final year at Hogwarts. When exposed feelings and unrequited romance get in the way of their friendship, they wonder whether they'll survive the school year.) Dreaming of Hope by adamsackleriskyloren83 (AO3 2019  Rated M Complete, 2 Chapters, Canon AU, Quick Synopsis: Kylo Ren goes to bed one night only to awaken as Rebel Pilot Ben Solo. Discovering that not only is Rey his wife, but he is also the father of a toddler(s) son/daughter.) Talk Nerdy To Me by andabatae (AO3 2019  Rated E Complete, 7 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: Grad student Rey is addicted to watching nature documentaries narrated by the mysterious Kylo Ren. In fact, listening to him recite animal facts is her favorite masturbation inspiration. One day, the poetry class she TAs for has a guest lecturer: Ben Solo, a large, cranky man with gorgeous hair, adorable glasses... and a very compelling voice.) Everything You Are by kereia (AO3 2019  Rated E Complete, One-Shot, Canon AU, Quick Synopsis: But the thing she loved most of all, the thing that she was downright addicted to, was the way Ben reacted whenever she touched him.) Eggplant Emoji by trasharama (AO3 2020  Rated E Complete, 5 Chapters, Modern AU, Quick Synopsis: A desperate Rey seeks refuge in Poe and Ben's spare bedroom. Ben didn't know she was a girl when he agreed to the roommate trial period--and now she won't stop sexting him? Climb aboard the Smutty McSmuttSmutt train!)

[descendantofthesparrow]

Shuffle Playlist -Rewrite- Part of Your World - Epilogue - here comes a thought

=

You huffed in slight frustration as you pushed a bush out of your way, you had gone to several shores along the Strait of Ursula looking for a certain sea witch, knowing that she wouldn’t be able to get back inside without using the remote or a certain spell.

And it seemed you finally found the one she had washed ashore at. Sitting at the line where the waves hit the sand, was Uma, curled up and her bun undone, her braids laying freely across her back and grazing her legs. Her face was buried in her knees, her heels kicked off a few feet away.

As you walked closer her head snapped up and she spun around, her honey-brown eyes widening in shock “you-what are you-?” she went silent as you stopped just in front of her and set down a black and red messenger bag, then took off your backpack and took out a large red towel. You tossed the towel around the frozen sea witch, who gasped at the heat coming off it. “I put it in the dryer so it was warm for you” you muttered, sitting down in front of her and picking up the black and red bag, holding it in front of her and waiting patiently for her to take it.

She just stared at it, untrusting of you and it. “it's just clothes and food, staying in a wet dress on a cold summer night is never fun” she glanced at you, swallowing down her fear when she saw no deception in your eyes. She carefully took the bag and set it on her lap, flipping open the flap and peering inside.

The first thing she could see was a large red long-sleeved shirt, with a hook on sewn to the chest. She slowly took it out of the bag, rubbing the soft fabric with her thumb. After a few moments, she threw it on her shoulder and dug back into the bag, next pulling out a pair of black jeans that seemed to be her size “How’d you know my size?” you snorted and shrugged

“Gil” she nodded at that, Gil was usually the answer to most things, and he had made her clothes before so it would make sense, he would know her sizes. She stared at the change of clothes, then look at you.

“um…” she muttered, glancing between the clothes and you. You popped your lips and shrugged.

“uh, use magic?” you suggested, smiling as Uma squinted for a moment then snapped her fingers, in a flash the clothes switching with her dress. She stared down at the sparkly turquoise dress, bunching it up in her hands and tossing it into the sand, ripping off her gloves and tossing them on the dress as well.

You watched as she glared at the items of clothing. Sighing you turned and dug into the bag, pulling out a set of sandwiches and holding them out to her. Uma glanced at them untrusting, and asked; “what are they?”

“the one with the white bread is peanut butter and jelly, the other is turkey and cheese with mayo, kept em simple” Uma gently took the peanut butter sandwich, watching you carefully as you unwrapped the other and bit into it.

She slowly unwrapped the peanut butter sandwich and took a small bite, her eyes lighting up as the grape jelly hit her tongue. You giggled a bit as she started to scarf down the sandwich, slowing down as the peanut butter caught up with her mouth “here” you reached into the bag and pulled out a thermos of cold milk, Uma grabbed it from you and popped open the top, downing the drink. You smirked to yourself as you grabbed another thermos holding (fav drink) out of the bag ‘glad I thought ahead’

“What is that?” Uma asked, wiping the leftover milk off her lips, peering inside the thermos “I've never had something like that before?”

“Milk, it's not expired though, that’s why it's so different” you mentally cursed Beast once again for making children eat and drink rotten food.

Uma nodded, eating the rest of her sandwich. As she finished her eyes drifted down to the ground, tracing the details of her dress.

“Why are you here” you glanced at her with a raised brow “why give me food? Clothes? A warm towel? Hell, why are you being…nice to me…I tried to hurt you” Uma grit her teeth, slightly glaring at you with tears in her eyes.

“because you’re Uma” you simply answered, giving her a soft smile and laughing as she just looked at you with wide eyes “you’re Harry and Gils best and oldest friend, I couldn’t let you stay out here all night cold and hungry” Uma shook her head, a tear trailing down her cheek.

“but I hurt Harry….why would he still care about me, why would Gil care?” she croaked, gasping a bit as you reached forward and brushed the tear off her chin. She stared wide-eyed at your smile.

“because they love you Uma” her eyes flashed with confusion “you are their best friend, their family. Of course they care about you. If they didn’t, they wouldn't have spent the last six months talking about you non-stop and trying to get you off the isle, it just sucks that the council sucks and have basically stopped the process of all that.” a small smile perked up on the corner of her lips before she gave you a look.

“but why you?...I tried to hurt you, and Harry got hurt instead…why did you come all the way out here to help me?”

“because…I care about you too” Uma stared at you, her jaw dropped “I know but…Harry and Gil have told me so many stories about you that I couldn’t help but come to care about you…even if we had never met…” you gave her a bright grin “did Harry really eat a whole bag of sour candy and not talk for a whole week?” Uma snorted and nodded.

“oooh yeah, it was the quietest week of my life, if only Gil had been the one to eat them” you covered your mouth and let out a muffled laugh. The two of you laughed at the thought for a moment before Uma went silent.

You turned and rose your brow “is…is Harry okay?” you let out a soft sigh and nodded, smiling at the clear relief that washed upon Uma’s face.

“He’s just fine, Mal did a healing spell and it's as if nothing happened to him” you assured, looking out to the ocean and taking a deep breath.

It was silent for a few moments, just you and Uma staring out into the darkness that was the ocean, the moon and stars being the only thing to illuminate your surroundings.

“…why are you really here? There have to be guards, there has to be something behind all this” she gestured to you then towards the forest just behind her. You just smiled.

“When Harry said you were slow to trust he wasn’t kidding” you chuckled, leaning your chin on your palm “I have no alternative motives, no guards, no plans, I just wanted to make sure you were okay” she continued to glare at you. “what is this really about?”

She finally broke her gaze, hugging herself “I hurt Harry, I hurt Gil…I told Mal to tell them that they were dead to me…yet after all this time, they’ve never forgotten me? They still cared?...and I just turned on them as soon as they turned their backs? They put so much faith and trust in me but I can't do the same?...I don’t deserve their kindness or yours”

You let out a soft sigh, looking away from her and into the water.

Here comes a thought~

(italics; (y/n), bold; Uma, italics&bold; both)

Take a moment to think of just

Flexibility, love, and trust

Take a moment to think of just

Flexibility, love, and trust

Uma gave you a look but you just smiled and placed your hands in your lap, continuing to look out to eh water.

Here comes a thought

That might alarm you

What someone said

Your mind flashed back to your first fight with Harry, you could hardly remember now what It was about but at the time it was pretty serious.

And how it harmed you

You remembered Harry shouting some scathing insult at you

Something you did

And you remember yelling back something that had made his face pale and his eyes overflow with tears.

That failed to be charming

Things that you said are

Suddenly swarming and, oh

You're losing sight

You're losing touch

All these little things seem to matter so much

That they confuse you

That I might lose you

Take a moment remind yourself to

Take a moment and find yourself

Take a moment to ask yourself if

This is how we fall apart?

You and Harry hadn’t spoken for two weeks after that, sitting apart in class, sitting away from each other in the cafeteria,  ignoring the other when the vks hung out.

Gil had gotten worried, scared that he would lose one of his friends to a fight.

But it's not, but it's not, but it's not, but it's not, but it's not

You looked down to see two fireflies resting on your hands, their glow slowly fading in and out.

It's okay, it's okay, it's okay, it's okay, it's okay

After those two lonely weeks, you and Harry had enough and got past your anxiety that the other was still mad and made up, learning that the other had forgiven you almost as soon as you had slammed the door to Harry's room.

You've got nothing, got nothing, got nothing, got nothing to fear

You had spent the entire day in your room, just talking and promising to communicate better and to never hurt each other like that again.

I'm here, I'm here, I'm here

Uma looked away from you, biting her lip as millions of memories flooded to her mind, your brows raising as they started to play out on the surface of the waves.

Here comes a thought

That might alarm me

What someone said

The image started to play Harry and Gil stepping into the limo, giving her sad looks as they drove away.

And how it harmed me

She remembered how her chest hurt when two months had passed, and there was still nothing on her coming to Auradon, when Davy suggested they forgot about her.

Something I did

She remembered tearing apart her room and the gifts harry and Gil had gotten her over the years, cursing them as she collapsed to the floor in tears.

That failed to be charming

Things that I said are

Suddenly swarming and, oh

She remembered when she had told Mal and Ben that her boys, Harry and Gil, her sweet boys, were dead to her. She remembered the look on Mal's face as if she had the worst thing as if she didn’t believe it.

How could she not have gotten the hint? It would only hurt them if they still cared about her, only if they still thought of her as their best friend.

I'm losing sight

I'm losing touch

All these little things seem to matter so much

That they confuse me

That I might lose me

She remembered her anger as she reached for you, wanting to hurt you for taking them away from her, wanting to destroy the person that had taken Harry away from her.

She remembered when Harry pushed you out of the way, she remembered when she slammed him into the water, she remembered that he almost immediately stopped moving, she remembered when those cruel thoughts of him getting what he deserved for betraying her.

She remembered looking back on the deck and her heart shattering as she watched you and Gil cry over Harry's body, she remembered the blood that pooled beneath his head, she remembered not hearing his heartbeat as she hid under the ship.

She remembered feeling terror as she thought she had killed her oldest and best friend; she remembered the relief that burst out of her chest when the cotillion crowd burst into cheers.

Take a moment remind yourself to

Take a moment and find yourself

Take a moment and ask yourself if

This is how we fall apart?

She remembered swimming back to the barrier and trying to get back in because someone who tries to kill their best friends deserves to be locked up. She remembered washing up on the shore of a random Auradon beach and curling up on the sand, holding herself as the image of Harry's unconscious form replayed in her mind.

But it's not, but it's not, but it's not, but it's not, but it's not

She took a deep breath, closing her eyes and looking up, reminding herself that they still loved her, they still cared about her, they didn’t blame her for anything.

It's okay, it's okay, it's okay, it's okay, it's okay

She opened her eyes and gasped slightly at the sight of the millions of stars looking back down at her, the milky way swimming across the sky.

I've got nothing, got nothing, got nothing, got nothing to fear

She took another deep breath, knowing Harry was safe, Gil was safe.

I'm here, I'm here, I'm here

Uma looked over to you, a watery smile growing on her face as you looked at her with such adoration and care.

And it was just a thought, just a thought, just a thought, just a thought, just a thought

It's okay, it's okay, it's okay, it's okay, it's okay

We can watch, we can watch, we can watch, we can watch them go by

From here, from here, from here

You reached out to her, holding out your hand. She slowly took it, tears slipping down her cheeks as you gripped back tightly.

Take a moment to think of just

Flexibility, love, and trust

Take a moment to think of just

Flexibility, love, and trust

Uma just held your hand, smiling at your grip, and squeezed back. “...thank you” she croaked, furrowing her brows a bit as you let go of her hand and stood up, brushing the sand off your pants.

“I should probably get back, I’ll bring you another change of clothes and more food tomorrow, there should be some more sandwiches, snacks, and drinks in the bag, should last you till tomorrow night…do you want me to tell Harry and Gil-“ Uma stopped you from continuing with a wave of her hand.

“not yet…I’m not ready to face either of them” you slowly nodded and crouched down, wrapping your arms around her and pulling her into a tight hug.

“Alright then, I’ll see you tomorrow.” She patted your back and watched you as you dug back into your backpack and pulled out an orange blanket. She caught it as you tossed it to her and slid on the backpack “a blanket so you don’t get cold…well…see ya” Uma nodded and watched as you walked away, before turning to the bag filled with food and drinks and dug back into it, humming as she pulled out a pastry looking item with white frosting on top and a brown sugar swirl on the bottom.

“see ya” Uma muttered, looking back up at the forest from where you had walked back into.

-Epilogue end-

There we go~ Uma has been told that her boys still care about her, she and (y/n) are on their way to becoming friends, and D3 is on its way to being set up! I think I will do a mini-series for in-between, basically an under the sea for rewrite but it'll have actual plot development stuff instead of just having Mal and Uma sing “stronger” at each other.

permtaglist

@queer-cosette @sephiralorange

@lunanight2012 @daughter-of-the-stars11

@musicarose @remembered-license

@random-thoughts-003 @descendantsobsessed

@thecaptainsgingersnap @rintheemolion

@verboetoperee @imtryingthisout​

 taglist

@thesailbells​ @beccad10x​

[ren1327]

Sweater Weather Ch.8

Hi guys!

So exciting news. Sweater Weather is almost complete at this point to where I will try to post the latest chapters Wednesdays and Sundays. I'm really jazzed that I'm going to wrap this project up and excited to get started on new ones.

As always, thanks for being so patient and I cant wait to bring you guys more content this autumn season!

-----------------------------------------------

Ben woke up with Kenji’s face in his stomach, his body folded over him as he rest on a pillow laid over the larger man’s back.

The sun was just peeking through the trees and he heard a whine, Bumpy scratching at the front door.

“Kenji.” Ben called.

Kenji groaned.

“Kenji, Bumpy needs to go for a walk.” Ben said.

“No…”

“Kenji, we slept in the living room, come on.”

“I got her, Ben!” Carmen said and walked in the room, dressed in a cute set of rainbow snow boots and a matching jacket. “I’ll be back in fifteen minutes. You guys should take a power nap on the bed to straighten out your spines.”

“Thank you, Carmen.” Kenji said, voice muffled in Ben’s sternum.

Ben chuckled and pet the back of his head before lightly smacking it. “Come on.”

Kenji slapped his thigh back a little too hard.

“Ow! That hurt!” Ben huffed.

“I can kiss it better.” Kenji hummed.

“…you can reach more in bed.” Ben murmured and Kenji slid back and sat up.

“I’m up.” Kenji said and Ben laughed, pushing him back so he could hobble to their bedroom, pulling back the quilts and comforters and sliding in, Kenji not wasting a moment joining him.

Ben blushed and pulled him close, kissing his forehead as the larger man sighed softly. Kenji snuggled into the smaller man’s chest and Ben hugged him best he could.

“This is nice.” Kenji hummed and Ben chuckled.

“Yeah.”

He closed his eyes and for a moment, imagined dry grassland or manicured shrubbery around buildings in San Antonio.

He would wake up like this every morning. Maybe with Kenji curled around him, he curled around Kenji, back to back or to one of Kenji’s rare starfish moments. Ben would most likely wake up first and get coffee going, then whine for Kenji to cook something. They’d eat together, go to work, maybe shower or go grocery shopping together, Bumpy next to them on her leash.

Domestic and happy.

He didn’t think it was possible.

Some part of him felt he didn’t deserve it.

And a smaller part of him wanted to grab and hold on to the image of he and Kenji walking hand and hand into a building where people were laughing and hanging out, waving good morning to them and a wall of smiling families who they had helped near the door.

He felt Kenji’s breathing deepen and felt him relax into sleep, his fingers massaging his scalp through the black locks.

…could they get married and start a family too?

He blushed and hugged Kenji closer.

With both hands, he held on to the image tight.

He could be happy.

*

Ben woke to the smell of French toast, bacon and hazelnut coffee.

He blinked awake, noticing a large pillow in his arms instead of the firstborn Kon heir.

“Morning, Sleepybutt.” Kenji said as he walked in with a tray.

“Afternoon.” Ben said, glancing at the clock.

“Not noon yet.” Kenji said, holding the plate out. “And bacon is an all-day thing.”

“This is turkey bacon.” Ben said.

“Cause too much grease gives you heart burn.” Kenji said. “I listened to you complain on the phone with Sammy the other night.”

“I love you.” Ben sighed and took the plate, then froze.

Kenji was blushing and staring at him.

“I-I mean…”

“Yeah!” Kenji shouted. “I get it. Um, I forgot…cream! For the coffee!”

Kenji quickly escaped the room, leaving Ben to blush down at the food, hoping things couldn’t get more awkward.

*

Things got more awkward.

Ben and Kenji were walking to the lighthouse, hands brushing, but not touching after a tense brunch.

Carmen once again kept Bumpy close, Kenji asking Ben if he wanted to explore the old light house.

Trudging up the gravel path, they made it to the tall structure, Kenji opening the door for Ben.

“I thought this needs a lighthouse keeper.” Ben said.

“Owen checks on it every other night, but it’s fully on a timer and the diagnostics are sent to us if anything looks suspicious.” Kenji said.

“So…your lighthouse is on a timer?”

“Pretty much.” Kenji said. “Buuuut…”

He pulled Ben close and smiled.

“More privacy.” Kenji said and kissed Ben’s cold nose.

Ben scoffed and pushed him away, then started up the stairs, Kenji right behind him as they both raced to the top, Kenji winning with his longer legs. The smaller man panted and Kenji opened the door, the very breath leaving Ben as he walked out and saw over the lake.

“Oh…” He whispered and stared out over the water and snow.

Kenji came up behind him, hugging him around the waist. “What a view.”

Ben nodded.

They stood in silence for a moment, Kenji laying his cheek on the top of Ben’s head.

“You’d leave this for San Antonio?”

“I’d leave it for you and we’d visit together.”

“Kenji…” Ben turned. “I don’t want to be your reason for doing things.”

“What do you mean?”

“I’m not Brooklynn.”

Kenji gasped softly. “I…I won’t lie, I swear!”

“And you will improve yourself for yourself too.” Ben said. “Not go along with whatever I say so we avoid conflicts. Real couples fight, Kenji.”

“I…What if we fight too much or I mess up, or we never figure it out?”

“Look at us now, Kenji.” Ben said, taking his hands. “Look how much we’ve figured out already.”

The shorter man closed his eyes.

“We don’t love each other, maybe we won’t really, or maybe…maybe we’ll be happy together forever.” Ben said. “But don’t treat me as all or nothing just yet. Don’t use me as a prop. When we go to the ball, just be my boyfriend and nothing else.”

“So…real boyfriend instead of fake boyfriend?”

Ben leaned forward and kissed his nose. “Exactly that.”

Kenji chuckled and pulled Ben close.

“Hey!”

They both looked down to see Owen and Carmen at the bottom of the lighthouse, looking up at the two.

“We’re leaving tonight!” Owen yelled. “So get packing!”

Kenji sighed and rested his forehead on Ben’s.

“Rain check?”

“Yeah.” Ben said and they waved down before going to the stairs.

*

Ben smiled as they were loaded into a van, Carmen sitting in the back with Bumpy as Ben and Kenji took the middle seats, holding hands and snuggled up together as Owen drove them to Seattle from the large boathouse they had docked the yacht in.

“So, how’s everything?” The bodyguard/assistant asked.

“Great.” Kenji said, leaning his head on Ben’s.

“They finally got together.” Carmen called.

“What?!” Kenji yelled. “You knew too?!”

“I’m your on-site bodyguard for a reason, kid.” Owen said with a smile.

Ben chuckled and looked up at Kenji. The taller man sighed and settled back into their cuddle, Bumpy jumping over the seats to lay in Ben’s lap as Carmen put on her headphones and started playing her switch.

“Hey.” He said softly and Ben looked up, eyes hooded with content.

“Hey.”

“Wanna go for a walk after dinner?” Kenji asked.

“Dinner with your parents?” Ben asked with a smile.

“The restaurant is in the hotel. We can go out for an hour or two with Bumpy to a café or the Space Needle or the Great Wheel…”

“I think it might be a little too late for all that. But maybe a café after I tell your parents I want to extend my stay?” Ben asked.

Kenji grinned and hugged Ben close.

“Aw.” Owen cooed and Kenji kicked the back of his seat.

*

Ben and Kenji were placed in a room together, Bumpy having a plush pet bed next to theirs.

Kenji was laying on his back as Ben changed from his dinner clothes into something more casual.

Dinner had been amazing, Kosei and Candy looking well rested despite the constant planning and rechecking of the ball’s supplies and preparation.

“Ben.” Candy had said over dessert. “You, Carmen and I should go shopping tomorrow morning.”

“Mom…” Kenji whined.

“Oh, right. I forgot Ben probably will want to go back…” She murmured.

“Actually.” Ben said. “Carmen was telling me about New Years and…”

He blushed, Kenji smirking and taking his hand.

“We were wondering if we could stay past New Years.” Kenji finished.

“Of course!” Kosei said with a wide smile, surprising his family and Ben from his outburst.

Candy clapped her hands.

“The we are definitely doing that shopping trip!” She said. “Sorry, Baby.”

“It’s cool.” Kenji said. “Bumpy and I will just hang out with Dad.”

Kosei nodded.

Dinner went on, and now they were going to go on their walk, Bumpy zooming around in circles in her little green vest and booties.

“Ready?” He asked Kenji.

Kenji lifted his legs and swung them down, using the momentum to stand, doing a little jump.

“Yeah.” He said and pocketed their room key.

He took Ben’s hand, who lifted Bumpy in his other hand, her leash around his wrist.

“Let’s go.” He said.

Kenji led his boyfriend to the elevator, then down to the lobby where they were greeted by a few front desk employees and the doorman.

Ben put Bumpy down, who immediately sniffed at the plant beds and started tugging Ben along.

Kenji laughed and wrapped an arm around Ben’s waist as they walked.

“It’s so bright!” Ben said with a smile, looking at the lights and neon.

“Is it what you thought it would be?” Kenji asked. “Or better?”

Ben smiled at Kenji. “Way better.”

They sat on a bench, an awning keeping snow off it as Bumpy sniffed around and they stared at the lights. Kenji took Ben’s hand.

“Ben, would your Mom…Would she have liked me?”

Ben blinked and thought. “I think she would have.”

“What was she like?”

“Never mad. Like I never saw her mad. I saw her frustrated and stressed but she never snapped at me.” He said. “She had long dirty blond hair and it wasn’t soft, but it always smelled good. When she cut it, I kind of missed watching her brush it. But she said her arms felt heavy all the time and I would do it for her. I remember she would hum or sing every time she cooked. She made a baked potato soup that would warm you from the inside out. Dave can make it close but…There was something about hers.”

Ben sniffed and smiled.

“Everything she touched seemed so much better. It was like she only knew how to be nice and positive. Like your mom actually. I bet they would have been best friends. I bet maybe your mom’s food would have made her stronger. Carmen would be another baby and she would love Bumpy and…who am I kidding, Kenji, she would love you just for being my friend, let alone boyfriend.”

Kenji hugged Ben close.

“She sounds amazing.” He said and Ben sniffed.

“I miss her so much. I never…I never really…”

“My Mom and Carmen celebrate this holiday in October. Um, it’s a couple days to remember those who moved on. We have an altar at our main house. Could I uh…even if we don’t stay together…could I add her picture? So we remember her?”

“You’d do that?” Ben asked. “To remember a woman you never met?”

“No. I think I’ve met her.” Kenji said and cupped Ben’s cheek. “She sounds a bit like you.”

Ben chucked wetly and smiled, kissing Kenji softly. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“Being you. I like you, Kenji Kon.” Ben said, getting up and holding out his hand.

Kenji smiled and took it.

“I like you too, Ben Pincus.”

He checked Bumpy and they started off again, hand in hand.

“So this café a favorite of yours?” Ben asked when he saw the shop at the edge of a plaza full of people talking and drinking coffee as a band played jazz in a covered outdoor stage in the middle.

“You know I—”

“Kenji?” A voice called and Ben felt his boyfriend freeze beside him as he looked towards their left.

A slender woman with pink hair and green eyes stood there with an older couple.

“Go on, I’ll just be a minute.” She told them and both men nodded and walked ahead towards the hotel, hand in hand.

Kenji gulped as one openly glared at him as they passed.

“Hi.” He said to her, Ben realizing who the girl was.

“Hi, Kenji.” She said, raising her chin. “Been a while.”

“How have you been, Brooklynn?”

[onlymexsarah]

Imperfections (R.L)

Remus Lupin x UW!Reader (Under weight)

I read a lot of imagines with plus size readers, and i think it's something beautiful, but instead I've never read about a under weight reader, insecure of herself and her body, so here I am, with a Remus Lupin ready to cheer you up.

Prompts: “I wish you could see yourself with my eyes. So you would understand that I’m in love with you, all of you.”

Gif is mine🍃

P.s.: English is not my first language, please if you notice some mistakes let me now🥰

Also, I’m not used to write one-shots, I’m writing a book rn, this is a new experience, but I hope you like it🥺

Transfiguration, you had to study for your Transfiguration lesson. You couldn't let McGonagall find you unprepared, so you would stay in the library one more hour while your schoolmates eat their lunch, beside you weren't hungry at all.

"Are you sure you don't want to come?" Asked your boyfriend standing up and looking you with hopeful eyes. Remus Lupin was the best boyfriend someone could ask for; he was clever, funny, cute and with always something to comfort you in your bad days. You haven't exactly his mind, due the fact that you always forget something about homework, lessons or Prefect's meetings; and didn't care how much time you forgot things, he would always reminder you them.

"Don't worry Rems, I'll catch you up later. Just need one more minute." You said smiling standing up to give him a soft kiss on his lips. True must be told, he didn't know that you forgot sometime to eat too, but it wasn't a big deal for you, it was a normal routine not eating to save time for studying or sleeping.

"I'll see you there, love." He smiled giving you a kiss more intense than the first one, and then you were alone looking the book in front of you studying until the last line.

An hour passed before you brought yourself in the Great Hall ready to eat. You saw Remus in the corner of your eyes waiting for you with the Marauders, but that day you weren't so hungry, and you knew that Remus would be worried for you, so you decide to sit with your housemate instead to not let Remus see your almost empty plate.

The chicken was delicious, you wanted so badly to eat more about it, but you were done with one piece, so you stand up ready to go towards your boyfriend. You didn't know what you must had done to deserve him in your life, to deserve his love. Not only he was the perfect gentleman, but he was extremely attractive, and all the girls in the school knew you picked the perfect mix that someone could find in a boy.

"You alright? You didn't seat with us." Remus whispered to you when you reached each other out of the Great Hall.

"Yes, don't worry. I had to tell Snape a thing about Potion. We are partners now." You rolled your eyes thinking about Slughorn and his idea to put you with Snape instead with Remus. 

You wanted nothing more than cuddle in Remus’ arms, those arms that made you feel protected, loved and safe. You wanted to lay with him, kiss his scars and telling him how beautiful he was, you wanted to make him see himself in the same way you saw him, because you knew how it felt avoiding the mirrors afraid of what you might see, or looking your body and see nothing else but imperfections. 

So now you two were on his bed, your face on his torso with his arm around you and the other hand in your hairs, listening his heartbeat like you would listen your favourite song. The other three Marauders left you alone, going around the school pranking people, and you were fine with it as long as you two had time for yourselves. 

“How about Christmas’ holiday? My mum are cooking turkey, with her special recipe.” said Remus looking the ceiling of his canopied roof.

“I’m not going to meet your parents. Not yet, I promised my father I will be with him this Christmas.” you tried to sound convincing, but the idea of meeting Mr and Mrs Lupin terrifided you. Not because you were afraid of them, but you were scared of the idea about them thinking you were not enough for their son.

“Why not?! My mum can’t wait to cry with you during one of your favourite films!” he said laughing. 

You looked the boy under you astonished. “You-you told your mum that? Remus Lupin I’m going to kill you!”

You started to tickle him under his armpits, making him wriggling under you. You were sure that the boys in the next dorms could hear you two laugh, but you didn’t care because seeing Remus laughing was the best thing you’ve ever seen in your life. 

You got distracted for a second, a tiny little second that Remus took as an opportunity, so he reversed your positions, finding yourself between the bed and him. With his hands he grabbed your wrists pulling them on the pillow still laughing. 

“You have nothing to worry about, love.” he whispered before kissing you. You smiled in the kiss, feeling the butterflies in your stomach as you were used with him. He interview your right hand with his, letting go the other that you brough in his hairs keeping him close to you. 

Your hands seemed to be made to fit together, his big one was holding your petite one still on the pillow while the kiss got more intense. With his free hand started caressing your hips, gently as a true gentleman, but it was enough to make you lose your mind. You wanted to go on, you wanted him badly, but when his hand fell on your hip bone, you froze. He was leaving little kiss on your neck, thing that would make you crazy few moments ago, but now the only thing you could focus on was his hand touching one of the part of your body where the bones could be feel more. You blocked him, almost brutally, shifting away from under his weight and putting your shoes on ready to go away. 

“Y/N what happened? Did I do something...?” he asked afraid to have done something wrong toward her, feeling his ears burn. 

“No, no. You didn’t do anything wrong.” you said trying to not let your voice break. “I’ve just remebered I have an essay for tomorrow.”

You ran out of his common room, without looking the Marauders that teased you about your time alone with Remus, and when you were alone in the hallway you stopped sitting on the stones floor. Why you had to be so stupid? You were almost there, you were almost done with your insecurities, and it was enough a touch on your hips to make you panicking. You knew that Remus loved you because your intelligence, behaviour and other things you still had to find out, but you also knew that once he will see your body, he will understand that he could have someone better. Someone who is not you. 

You seemed a child, and you still acted in that way the days later, when you avoided him in all ways. You sit at your table with your fellows, sitting with your friends (who were not the Marauders) during lessons and sneaking away before he could pull all his things in his bag. 

Were you on the wrong side? Yes. Were you a coward? Also yes. Could you stop it? No. Your body was the problem that you had since years, and it wasn’t Remus’ fault if he didn’t know nothing, you just didn’t open up with him yet.

So now you were in the Owlery, cuddling your and Remus’ owls like you were used to do every week. You heard a noise in the stairs, but it could be some student you thought, so you kept feeding Remus’ owl.

“So you’re alive!” you froze without glacing back at the boy. “Hardly to tell since we haven’t see you for days.” James Potter could be the funniest guy  of the school, but if you hurt his friends he would make sure that you pay for it, and so you didn’t know what to do; never James had spoken to you with such venom in his voice. 

“Now you see me.” you walked toward the door ready to go away from him, but he stopped you with his voice.

“You know, I told him so!” you looked him confused. “I told him to break up with you a week ago, and you know what he said? He agreed with me.” your eyes bacame wet, trying to not cry in front of him as a child. “He wants to start a new chapter of his life, but he can’t do it if you two don’t break up. Take a move, alright? I don’t want to see him with someone like you. Someone who clearly doesn’t care about him. Who-”

“Prongs! What is happeing here?” Sirius arrived with Peter interrupting James who was burning you with his eyes, if his voice wasn’t already enough.

“Y/N are you fine?” asked Peter worried to see you like that for the first time. You were the stronger one, the girl who never cry, but in front of him, right now, there was a girl...broken.

“Yes, she’s fine. We had just had a talk, she was leaving.” said James without looking away from you. It was clear that he didn’t want to see you again, and you didn’t dare to look at Sirius because you were sure that you would finde the same look in his eyes. Instead you gave a weak smile to Peter, the only one who seemed worried for you, and then you leave wiping away the few tears that fell on your cheeks.

“What the hell is wrong with you?! Remus would never dream to leave her, and surely you would never say something like that to him! You care too much about her too to hate her.” Sirius said angrily to his mate while the curly boy was sending a owl that Peter guessed was for Lily.

“We know her, it was the only way to make Y/N take a move. I bet that she is going to speak with Remus right now.” he smirked pleased with himself.

“I can’t decide if you are extremely stupid or a genius.” said Peter running a hand through his hair. 

“We’ll see, Peter, we’ll see.” 

***

James was right, you wanted to speak with Remus, if it was true that he wanted to break up, then you would give him the opportunity, even if the thought broke your heart. When you passed in front of the Great Hall you stopped confused seeing everyone inside, and looking your wrist watch you saw that it was dinner time. This meant that the Astronomy Tower was free, so you walked toward it forgetting about the dinner and hoping that you could spend a night alone with the stars. 

You were sit with your back leaning against the wall, looking the sky, when the door opened and Remus were relief to see you there. “Knew you weere here.” You glaced at him quickly, surprised to hear his voice as soft as you remembered. Wasn’t he angry with you? So why he was there, with a plate full of food in front of you with his kind smile. “I saw you didn’t eat anything tonight, so I brought you something.” he rubbed his neck with his free hand turning in a soft shape of pink that you couldn’t notice due the weak light of the moon. 

“Yeah, I’m not really hungry. But...thanks.” you gave him a soft smile moving uncomfortable in your position. Should you start to speak? Should you wait him to take the first move? You were on the wrong side, you had to speak first, so when he sat beside you shyly, you took a deep breath. “I know why you’re here...and I’m really sorry.” your voice cracked and you looked away. “I’m so sorry, Remus. H-he told me you were thinking about that since a week and it’s fine...” no it wasn’t. “I understand why you want to break up with me. I’m just sorry for how I was toward you these days, I wasn’t angry with you, I swear...” You wiped away the tears with your hands trying to compose yourself. You were not going to cry in front of him, you had no right to cry.

“WHAT? Who told you- Me breaking with- what are you talking about?” he asked astonished looking your confused face.

“James told me you are thinking about breaking up with me since a week...” you said uncertain. 

“Such a dickhead! I can’t believe he told you so, he saw me crying thinking about that YOU wanted breaking up with me!” he moved his hands in the air and you looked him astonished. He hadn’t realized what he said until his eyes met yours. “Well, I wasn’t literally crying... just you know, the full moon is in three days and I get a bit too emotional.” you looked him amused while he tried to find an excuse making you laugh. “it could have been few drops of water, it was hot so I was sweating too.” 

“Oh yeah sure. Few drops of water, yes.” you giggled looking him finding his beautiful smile while his eyes were on you. You had to tell him, you own him. “I have to tell you something, I know I have been awfull toward you, and it’s not your fault. Blimey Remus, I could never think a life without you, not say breaking up with you.”

He left a breath of reliefe keeping listening you carefully. “That night...did I put pressure on you? You didn’t want to...” he blushed without finishing his sentece.

“No, no, no. I want you! I can’t believe I’m saying this out loud, but you have no idea about the thoughts that I have when we are together.” You looked away shyly; taking a deep breath you stood up torturing your hands. “I don’t eat, and it took me to be under weight. The healers say I have to do more meals during the day but I can’t! I-”

He stood up, getting closer to you and wiping away the tears that were falling from your eyes. He wanted hug you so much, but he knew he had to leave you let out everything you kept for yourself for years.

“You know how forgetful I am, and with all the things that happen in a day I forget that I must eat, beacuse I’m never so hungry to notice it. This is why sometime I didn’t sit with you, because I didn’t want to let you see how little I ate...” you were looking down, ashamed by how you were.

He took your hands in his owns. “I know.”

Your eyes shifted on his face suddenly confused, did he know? “What?”

“Honestly, what kind of boyfriend i would be if I don’t notice that my girlfriend eats less than everyone else, or that she doesn’t eat at all? I kinda know how to recognize when someone has a secret.” he shrugged innocently. “But I’ve never said anything because I know you, and I know that you would tell me when you would be ready. I still don’t get the problem, though...”

How he could not see the problem?  “The problem is, that everyone think if you are thin then you have a perfect body. Well it’s not! I have not a perfect body, actually I hate it! With all the clotes on it seem that my body is ‘normal’ for the standard of the people, but without them...” you felt a strange anger inside you, anger toward the people that never cared about your feeling just because you were ‘thin’, without thinking that you could have not like your body. “Without them it’s full of imperfection! But of course, I’m thin so I must be happy, right? I am not, because be thin is not cool. People think that when you are thin you have no problems, I don’t know the others, but surely not when you are as thin as me.” 

You had walked away from him, too angry to stay still, and now you were taking deep breaths trying to calm down. Remus came in front of you slowly, understanding your all point. “Are you really talking abour imperfection with someone who has scars on all his body?” 

“You know that I love your scars.” you rolled your eyes looking everyshere but him and wiping away the last tears.

“And I love you. Again, I don’t see the problem.” his smile made you ask if you spoke english or not, the problem was evident.

“You are used to see me like that; clotes, make up, with my awesome personality and intelligence.” you joked a little. “But I don’t know if you will still love me if I show you everything. I mean, I don’t love me too, so why should you do it?” 

He felt sad suddenly, it hurted him see you like that; see you full of insecurities like him. For him, you were the most beautiful girl in the world, didn’t matter how much imperfections you had. “ I wish you could see yourself with my eyes. So you would understand that I’m in love with you, all of you. I don’t care about some imperfections, those are the things that make me understamd how much you are perfect to me.” 

“I love you too.” You whispered back, without knowing what to say. 

He kissed you softly, caressing your cheek with one hand and wrapping the other around you. You brought your hands behind his neck smiling, you have been such a idiot, avoiding him for days have been the most difficult thing to do; you needed him like the air. “And then, I’m curious about those thounghts of yours.”

He joked keeping his forehead resting on yours, and you blushed a little. “Sure, but now I’m hungry.” you took his tie pulling him down again to kiss him, knowing that he will always love you as you are.