#i think that would be a really interesting part 2 to this

[hoshifighting]

tutor!woozi (part 2)

check the part 1 (kinktober bonus)

WARNINGS: +18, smut, (oral f. & m.), throat fucking, penetrative sex, mentions of body fluids (cum, spit)

after that night, for all the times you’d wanted to text him, your ego kept its foot firmly on the brake. if jihoon thought you’d just come crawling back after his little remark, he was dead wrong. it didn’t matter how much your body craved another taste of him; no way were you about to give him that satisfaction. besides, it wasn’t like you were the only one who enjoyed that night, despite his attitude. if he wanted it again, HE’d have to come to you.

over the next week, every hallway encounter was a battle of wills. you’d pass by him with your friends, glancing away just slightly so you wouldn’t have to meet his gaze. and while your friends couldn’t help but notice the way jihoon’s friends looked at you as you walked by—waiting for the smirk you always used to throw his way—you’d hold your chin up and act like he didn’t even exist.

the whispers had started up again, too. after all, you and jihoon had been seen together plenty at the start of the semester, supposedly “studying” for a class you knew you didn’t even share. his friends had even toasted him over some rumor that tutoring wasn’t the only “learning” happening during those sessions. and now? they watched you like they were trying to figure out if you’d switched interests, especially when they saw you walking through campus with someone else’s arm casually slung over your shoulder. jihoon’s friends wore confused expressions, and if jihoon himself noticed…well, he didn’t give a single clue.

but it was getting harder to ignore it. especially tonight.

it was 9 pm, and you were dressed and ready for a night at the local bar, hoping a little drink and dance would be enough to take your mind off him completely. heading out, you made the mistake of cutting through his dorm hall, almost jogging to keep the tension from catching up with you. maybe he’d be out. or maybe he was too busy doing something else. you didn’t care. but as you neared the end of the hallway, a hand caught your arm, yanking you backward so quickly that you stumbled.

before you could react, you found yourself inside a dorm room, the familiar smell already cluing you in to where you were before you could fully process it. jihoon’s hand was still around your arm, the dorm was silent, the noise of the hall muffled as the door clicked shut behind you.

“where are you running off to, dressed like that?”

your pulse was racing, but you gave him a steady look, shrugging your arm free of his grip. “does it matter?” you smirked, turning as if to open the door, only to feel him step even closer behind you, blocking the way.

“what’s wrong with you?” you ask, crossing your arms.

you knew you had his attention, and now, for whatever reason, it looked like he couldn’t hold back anymore. jihoon opens his mouth like he’s about to answer, but he bites his tongue, his gaze dropping to the side as if the walls would have a solution for him.

“what’s wrong with me?” he finally retorts, jaw tense. “you had to ignore me that hard in front of my friends? couldn’t even throw a glance my way?”

you let out a genuine laugh. “weren’t you the one who told me not to reach out to you unless i wanted a ‘good fuck’? well, sorry, but didn’t seem worth it.”

his eyes flash. “really? ‘cause you seemed pretty into it at the time,” he counters, almost daring you to deny it.

“maybe i was.” you shrug. “but maybe i got over it.”

jihoon’s jaw clenches, and he takes a half step forward, closing the space separating you. “over it? you think you can just get over it that easy?”

“why not?”

he lets out a scoff, shaking his head. “you’re full of it. bet you thought about that night as much as i did. don’t. lie.”

your heart races, but you lift your chin defiantly. “if i’m full of it, then so are you, mr. i-don’t-need-anyone-reachin’-out-to-me. didn’t think you’d care if i ignored you. you’re all talk jihoon.” you tease, looking up at him, daring him to prove you wrong.

“all talk?” he scoffs, his mouth inches from yours, but he doesn’t close the gap. “maybe you need a reminder of how ‘not worth it’ i was.”

before you can reply, his hand slides down to the curve of your hip, pulling you close as his other hand tilts your chin up. his lips brush against yours in the faintest tease of a kiss before he pulls back, just enough to keep you wanting.

you let out a frustrated huff, trying to close the distance, but he holds you in place, a cocky smirk creeping onto his face. “not so fast... you wanted this, didn’t you?”

“you know i did.”

“so admit it... admit you wanted me to come after you.”

your pride fights to hold out, but the way his fingers dig into your ass meat, the way his voice drops just for you, it’s impossible to resist. “fine,” you whisper back. “i wanted you to come after me.”

he’s leaning in, lips parted, ready to crash into yours finally when your hand presses against his chest. he freezes, eyes flicking up to yours, searching. “bad boys don't get kissed.” you mock, savoring the way his expression falters.

he recognizes that phrase. he opens his mouth, maybe to protest, but he just closes his eyes, breathing out a low exhale through his nose, clearly biting back his response.

but the fury in his eyes returns, darker, and without a word, his hand slides up to the back of your neck, pulling you down with a grip that tells you exactly where this is going.

you let him guide you onto your knees.

“fine,” he mutters, voices gravelly, fingers grazing your jaw. “don’t need your kiss, anyway. got a better idea.”

his thumb drags along your lower lip, pressing until you open your mouth for him, and he can’t hide the hungry look that flashes across his face.

“this mouth of yours,” he mutters, thumb slipping between your lips. “always running it, always pushing me.” he watches intently as you take him in, tongue curling around his thumb, obedient despite the defiance in your eyes. “bet you’ll think twice about mouthing off when you’re choking on my cock.”

he undoes his shorts string, sliding it off, and before you know it, he’s pushing the fabric down just enough to free himself, his cock standing hard, thick and flushed in front of you.

he strokes himself slowly, dragging his length along your lips, smearing precum over them like lipgloss as he says, “you tap my thigh if you need a breath, got it?”

you nod, mouth already watering as you part your lips wider, letting him guide himself between them. his fingers tangle in your hair, pulling just enough to make you feel the sharp tug, and then he starts pushing forward, filling your mouth inch by inch until he’s pressing against the back of your throat.

he doesn’t ease up. he moves faster, driving deeper until he’s hitting that spot that makes your throat clench around him, your eyes watering instantly. spit starts to collect at the corners of your mouth, sliding down your chin as he pulls back only to push in again, even deeper this time, his cock stretching your throat wide, demanding every inch of space.

“all that attitude… gone.” his hand tightens in your hair, holding you still as he starts thrusting with a rough rhythm, hips snapping forward. “bet you’d do anything to prove me wrong now, wouldn’t you?”

he’s relentless, each thrust pressing your mouth and throat to their limits, your gag reflex triggered with every push. you feel spit pooling, slipping past your lips as you struggle to keep up with him, swallowing around his length even as he reaches deeper, his cock twitching at the tight, involuntary clenches of your throat.

you’re practically dripping, reduced to whimpers and gasps as he fucks your mouth, his hips rolling forward again and again, no space left for anything but him. when he pulls back for a second, a trail of spit stretches between your lips and the head of his cock, and he groans, wiping the mess over your cheek before plunging in again, going even harder.

“so pretty like this,” he mutters, watching as your eyes grow wetter, each thrust forcing a new wave of spit down your chin and neck, over his thighs. your fingers gripping his thighs for balance, and he smirks, giving a particularly sharp thrust that has you choking, throat convulsing as a line of spit drips down your chin. “that’s right. take it all.”

he starts slowing, grinding his hips forward, keeping himself pressed deep as he lets out a low groan, feeling the way you tremble. and then he thrusts one last time, deeper than before, pushing himself right to the base. he lets out a ragged breath as he stills, his cock twitching as you feel him tense, holding himself there, filling your throat as he spills into you, viscous and hot.

you swallow as best as you can, the bitter taste coating your tongue, but he doesn’t let you pull back right away.

you let the fullness press down on your throat until the edges of your vision begin to blur, the air thinning, everything swimming. you tap his thigh rapidly, a faint, desperate plea, and just as your lungs burn hottest, he releases, pulling you back with a hand steadying your shoulder. you slump onto your heels, shoulders sagging as you gulp down air, your head swimming with the remnants of his hold on you.

his hands stay firm on your shoulders, keeping you steady as you breathe, your throat aches, stretched and raw, the sting of his rough pace lingering with every shallow gulp.

as he maneuvers you onto the bed, his hands slide down impatiently and your dress and panties are gone all in once. he pauses for a moment, taking you in, his gaze raking over the sight of your swollen lips and sultry eyes, glazed with that barely-there smirk. 

he cant do this right now.

he grips your arm, twisting you to fall chest-first onto the mattress, hips lifted up as his arm curls around you.

“you—” you scoff, voice raspy, “can’t you fuck me while looking at my face?”

he lets out a low laugh, leaning close to your ear as his hand slides down your back. “oh, i think you’ve had enough of my face for tonight… plus, i think you look even better like this—bent over and whining.”

you couldnt even have a second to roll your eyes, a comeback on the tip of your tongue, but he’s already there, pressing into you suddenly, stretching your pussy in one hard, unrelenting thrust that punches the breath right out of your lungs. a cry rips from you, loud and hoarse, and you brace yourself against the mattress, fingers twisting into the sheets as your whole body shakes.

"that shut you up?” he breathes, hands digging into your hips as he sets a bruising pace. you can’t even catch your breath, every thrust leaving you reeling, gasping for air. tears prick at your eyes, spilling over as he hits that spot, so precise it’s maddening.

“fuck—s-so deep—” you choke out, incoherent as you press your cheek to the sheets, gripping the fabric so hard your knuckles ache. his fingers dig into the meat of your hips, pulling you back to meet every thrust, his balls slapping your clit making you convulse with everythrust. 

“thought you wanted this, yeah?” he taunts, leaning down. “thought you liked it rough. what, too much for you now?”

“n-no—” you manage, though the word comes out in a broken sob, your voice betraying you. he’s unrelenting, snapping his hips forward with every word, and you can feel yourself falling apart, the way he’s not holding anything back. it’s dizzying and yet you can’t help but crave it, want more, need more.

“thought you could handle it, acting all cocky,” he sneers, giving your ass a hard smack that makes you jolt, a fresh tide of tears spilling down your cheeks.“crying for it. pathetic.”

you let out a choked, breathless sob, the humiliation only heightening the need simmering inside you. “p-please…” you whimper, unable to do anything but plead as he keeps driving into you.

“oh, now you’re begging?” he laughs. “all that attitude, all that talk, and now you’re nothing but a crying mess on my bed.”

another broken cry slips out of you, and he chuckles. his hands trail down your spine, his fingers digging into your skin, grounding you, steadying you in the haze.

“you’re so fucking pretty like this,” he coos. “all desperate… should’ve known you’d like it this way.”

you can’t respond, can’t do anything but let out a helpless, broken cry, body arching, straining against him as you feel your orgasm approaching. and even then, he doesn’t stop, doesn’t let up, keeping you there.

“you thought you could come in here all high and mighty that night.. now look where that got you.”

“shut up,” you manage to gasp as he snaps his hips harder, the sound echoing in the small space. “you’re—” another thrust cuts you off, drawing another whimper from your throat.

“i’m what? too rough for you? too much for that little mouth of yours? you’ve got no problem talking back when you’re not getting fucked, huh?”

“i said shut up!” you cry out, though your voice is shaky, betraying you. “you’re just—oh my god—”

“just what?” 

“i hate you,” you whimper, even as your body betrays you, arching into him, chasing that sweet friction.

he can hear the contradiction.

“sure you do,” he laughs softly, his breath warm against your skin.

the moment you squeeze him harder, makes him wince, his cock feels so sensitive, after that last mind-blowing orgasm, and he can’t help but throw his head back, his breath hitching in his throat as he fights to control himself.

you’re lost in your own world, eyes shut tight as you cling to him, and he uses that to his advantage. with a smirk curling on his lips, he pulls out slowly, relishing the way your body protests against the emptiness.

“n-no, jihoon!” you whine, instinctively reaching for him. you grab his hand from behind your back, intertwining your fingers with his, a silent plea not to tease you anymore. 

“c’mon, jihoon, just stop teasing me already.” you push your ass against his hips, a cheeky slap echoing in the room. 

he would be lying if he says it doesn’t turn him on, when your existence is enough to make his blood run hot. as he lowers himself behind you, he can’t help but watch the way your pussy clenchesaround nothing, how your curves seem to invite him in. 

he leans in, letting his breath ghost over your skin before he dives in, his tongue swirling around your dripping pussy. you cry all cute on his sheets, like his tongue was a sweet and massaging reward after he destroyed your cunt with his thick lenght.

he lets your clit rest under his tongue as he dives the tip of the wet, pinky muscle, between your folds. just to flick the tongue down again and take the throbbing nerve inside his mouth, making you sob.

his tongue dances across your folds, the slickness of your cum coating him. his mouth is warm and inviting, eager haven as he drinks you in. he alternates between languid licks that tease your puffy lips and insistent flicks that make you roll your eyes. 

your hands tangle in his hair from behind, pulling him closer as you urge him on, the silky strands slipping through your fingers. his fingers tighten around your thighs, holding you firmly in place as he plunges his tongue deeper, swirling it around inside you.

your body is a symphony of slickness, the remnants of your cum coating his chin and the skin around his mouth. he dives back in, tongue swirling around your entrance, licking up every drop of your honey before turning his attention back to your clit.

“i’m so close, jihoon,” you whimper. “that's it!”

he responds by sucking your clit into his mouth, swirling his tongue around it while his fingers push into you, the pressure of them stretching you just right. 

as if on cue, you feel that big hot bubble in your lower belly snap, you cry out, each pulse of the orgasm making you tighter around his fingers. 

jihoon couldn't shake the feeling of unease as he watched you get up from his bed, your movements quiet and subdued after your intense orgasm. the post-orgasm glow faded too quickly.

“where do you think you’re going?” he asked as he pulled you back down onto the bed. you landed softly, your eyes wide and innocent as you frowned at him.

“i’m… leaving?” you said, trying to keep your tone light.

he exhaled sharply, squeezing his eyes shut for a moment as he fought against the frustration. “you’re only saying that because of how i made you leave the last time, aren’t you?”

you shifted slightly, looking away as if the truth was too difficult to face. “maybe..” you admitted softly, and that single word made his heart sink.

“i’m sorry about that,” he said, sincerity lacing his tone. “i miss those tutoring classes, you know? i didn't mean to push you away like that. it’s just… i think—”

“you think?” you shot back, crossing your arms defiantly. “you told me not to come after you unless i wanted a good fuck. not very delicate.”

“that was a mistake,” he insisted, as he searched your eyes. “i didn’t think it would end up like this. i thought we were just messing around.” he ran a hand through his hair, frustration evident on his face. “but i want more than that. i like having you around.”

you looked at him, your expression softening just a little. “so, what? you want to tutor me again? pretend like we didn’t just…” you trailed off.

“no,” he replied firmly. “i want to be honest with you. i want you to want me, not just as a way to fill some need… just like i want you.” he paused, gathering his thoughts.

“so you’re just going to keep me here, like this?” you asked, tilting your head. 

“if you’ll let me,” he replied. “just stay.”

“you really think it’s that easy? just because we had one good round?”

“it’s not just about the sex,” he said, getting nearer. “i want to explore more than that, but only if you’re willing.”

“and if i’m not?” you asked.

“then i guess i’ll have to work a little harder to change your mind,” he teased lightly.

you rolled your eyes but couldn’t help the smile creeping onto your lips. “good luck with that, jihoon. i’m not that easy.”

“i never thought you were,” he smirked, leaning closer. “but i’m willing to put in the effort. so, what’s it gonna be?”

you bit your lip, “maybe i’ll stick around for a little while longer,” you replied, leaning back into the bed with a teasing smile.

“good choice.”

[slytherinboysvip]

Imagine best friend Mattheo being absolutely obsessed with his innocent little Hufflepuff bsf but she just can’t tell. Everyone else knows, and it is quite obvious, but she just can’t think someone like him would want someone like her. But when she jokingly says she’s gonna get Cedric to take her virginity he decides it’s time he came clean.

Possibly with some soft smut if you are comfortable with it of course

bsf mattheo riddle x hufflepuff reader

hopefully this matches your request <3 i’ll most likely make a part 2 for this because.. you’ll see ;) 3.5k words

you lived a rather simple uncomplicated life, attending hogwarts as a hufflepuff with no interest in anyone’s drama. though you kept to yourself most times you tried to be nice to all your peers maintaining your classic hufflepuff demeanor, despite this there was one thing that was different about you.

you see, you didn’t see or understand why people don’t like other houses just because of “house rivalry” especially the students who weren’t even participating in any sports or point winning. and with this over your years though you had few friends you had one best friend who at first seemed rather impossible to be friends with.. mattheo riddle.

when you two met you were a fourth year and him a fifth, coincidentally you were going on to a few friends about your annoyance with people automatically assuming the worst of slytherin even though you yourself weren’t in their house or nearly like one. mattheo overheard this heated- adorable voice coming from behind him and he walked towards you carefully.

he sat down in front of you beside your friend as she gawked faces towards you at his presence. “you don’t think we’re too mean, huh?” he questioned small laugh leaving his lips. “i just think that some people are misunderstood and just because some wizards turned out bad doesn’t mean all of them in your house are” you looked at him answering his question with ease

he smirked in amusement and leaned a little closer to you “hm, hufflepuff eh? what year are you puff?” he sat back examining you and you didn’t fail to notice that nickname he slipped in “fourth year but i have an early birthday which is annoying because i could technically be out sooner” you sighed ignoring his staring.

“well, seeing as it’s ravenclaw against gryffindor do you wanna watch the quidditch game with me i know the best view” he stood up and held his hand out for you, you look towards your friends and they’re both nodding their heads for you to go so you did.

from that point on you and mattheo had been best friends, sadly he was in his seventh year and now you in your sixth nothing much had changed in your life. living vicariously through mattheo and his stories about slytherin parties and how you should go to one with him before it’s too late, he’d tell you about his sexual adventures and your jaw would drop everytime.

you yourself also confided in him though with much less interesting things, telling him how you feel unlikeable by guys sometimes because they never try to get or talk to you, or how you feel lonely because you’ve never had a a boyfriend before. hed always help soothe the thoughts away, telling you that it’s only your brain making those things up , “listen y/n, anyone who doesn’t love you is fucking insane���.

𓆙

talking to your friend zarah who’d been there since day one you always told her what you told matt, for the most part. “i just don’t get why nobody is interested in me zar, like am i genuinely that ugly” you plopped onto your bed sighing dramatically. “you’re not ugly and if you think no guys want you you’re blind i know one in particular that really, really wants you” she giggled.

you looked at her with a confused expression “i must be missing something because i have no idea who you’re talking about” you awaited her response and she just rolled her eyes and sighed “girl your practically boyfriend of a best friend you do everything with” she gave you a duh look and you just laughed. you genuinely couldn’t believe she’d even think he’d like you especially with all the girls he’d been with, “you’re hilarious, we both know he doesn’t want me he wants all the girls he tells me about” you started to compose yourself but zarah’s expression didn’t change.

“you literally must be blind y/n do you need glasses? or should i say puff? let’s talk about how that man hasn’t stopped calling you that pet name since you’ve met.. he’s in love” she rolled her eyes raising her hands in the air. “i still don’t think he wants me so there’s no convincing me” you shrugged her off and she groaned getting up and leaving your shared dorm.

𓆙

“puff you gotta come to this party, slytherin won agains gryffindor i just know this is gonna be the party you want to go to pleaseee” mattheo put his hands on your shoulders shaking you “fiinee” you attempted to answer between shakes before he let you go “if i would’ve known it was that easy i would’ve done that years ago” he rolled his eyes.

“anyways it’s tonight at like 8 so i’ll just get you from your dorm at like 7 do you think they’ll let me in? actually what’s the password?” he didn’t give you time to finish any of your sentences before you just gave him the password “butterscotch” you whispered, in response mattheo laughed “fucking butterscotch merlin that’s hilarious” you looked up at him and rolled your eyes walking away.

“i’ll see you at 7 puff” he yelled across the hall and you just gave a thumbs up and continued walking. you honestly were quite nervous seeing as you’ve never necessarily been to a party before, you’ve made small appearances at hufflepuff parties but you’ve heard they don’t even compare to slytherin.

making your way into your dorm you spot zarah and you pull her up from the common room couch “i finally said yes to a party need help now” you quickly mumbled and she quickened her pace “when does it start girl i need the info right this second come on you’re talking too long for me” she rushed and you blurted it all out “8pm he’s getting me at 7 he has the password he will be at the dorm” closing the door behind you two you both stopped to catch your breath

“sooo is it a dateee” she shimmied her arm on you winking “i already told you he doesn’t like me!!” you replied to her relentlessness. “ugh whatever we need to get you ready girl it’s already six” she pushed you onto your shared vanity chair and pulled out all of your makeup and a few things of hers, “creative control?” she asked smirking at you “mm fine but not too much” you agreed “we’ll see” she giggled.

after around 30 minutes she finished your makeup and she showed you the finished product, looking at yourself in the mirror you thought how you never would’ve put on red lipstick yet you feel really good in it. she gave you a small smokey eye and a small winged liner and you felt you looked more aggressive then you were, but you kinda loved it.

“it’s so much but so pretty” you admired yourself and the makeup she put on you slowly getting used to the feeling of fake eyelashes on your eyes. “i’m so glad you love it, but we need to find an outfit like three hours ago” she joked and rushed to your closets “i actually have the perfect dress in mind if you’re feeling the want to rep slytherin green” she raised her eyebrows up at you in a suggestive matter “sure why not” you shrugged

she handed you a velvet body con forest green dress that you were sure was going to be extremely short and you mean in every place. she held it up onto you “this will be perfect. get it on come on” she rushed you into the bathroom and you began putting it on “this is sooo tight” you called out as you struggled “oh i forgot it was a corset back wait i need to help you can i come in” she yelled through the door

“yeah come on i need this thing one me already” you struggled more as she walked in and immediately began to help you loosening the strings of the dress and pulling it down onto you “there we go now suck in like your life depends on it” she said half jokingly and began retightening the corset back. with every pull it felt like your chest was spilling out more and more and your ribs were shrinking “okay merlin that’s enough before i can’t breathe” you huffed and she stopped tying it off in a bow

“stop you look so hot y/n i bet matt will be drooling” she teased and you just rolled your eyes “what do we do with my hair” you looked at her with horror as you only had ten minutes before he should arrive. you quickly began curling your hair not really caring if it was messy just giving it some body and just as you were spraying perfume on there was a knock on your door.

zarah looked at you and whispered “answer it go go now” she pointed to the door like she was afraid to touch it herself and you walked over opening it to see mattheo in an all black button down with the top few buttons undone and black dress looking pants yet somehow he didn’t look overdressed. he didn’t say anything for a minute he was just staring at you looking up and down in awe “holy fuck y/n who did your makeup you look woah” he put his finger on your chin moving your head around examining your makeup

“zarah isn’t it pretty” you smiled and he removed his hand and replied “yeah you are, now let’s go” he grabbed your hand and you looked behind you waving bye to zarah “he’s so in love with you” she whispered before the door slammed closed.

𓆙

once you got the the party you noticed there were already many slytherins already pregaming and mattheo brought you two to them, “let’s get some alcohol in you little puff” he winked and poured you a shot of who knows what, you smelled the foul drink and it made your nose burn “come on do ittt” he cheered on and you held your nose throwing the shot back gagging at the taste. “how do people enjoy that” you made a face at him “like this” he replied taking two shots himself, “now catch up” he winked pouring you yet another

“if i didn’t know any better id say you’re trying to get me drunk matt” you laughed and he looked at you amused “obviously that’s what im trying to do it’s a party” he put the shot glass to your lips and you parted them taking the burning substance down your throat, “eugh that didn’t get any better the second time” you shook your head in disgust. “hm, let me make you an actual drink” he grabbed a clear liquor and a red juice mixing them together adding more alcohol than your past two shots and handed it to you

“matt this smells foul” you looked up at him, “just try it trust me the slytherins have the masking drink down” he winked and you reluctantly took a sip, and to your surprise all you tasted was juice. after taking another few sips you quick began drinking it and mattheo pulled the cup from your lips “slow down there this shits dangerous you’ll get so drunk you won’t be able to walk straight” he chuckled. “it’s not my fault they made it taste like juice” you shrugged still sipping.

“hey mattheo have your little hufflepuff take some shots with us” enzo threw his arm around your shoulders and mattheo pushed them off almost immediately “no she doesn’t need any shots” he spoke “you didn’t even ask me” you protested, granted you didn’t necessarily want to take any shots you just didn’t like being talked for. “oo are you sure you’re not slytherin you got an attitude” enzo laughed handing you a shot and you looked at mattheo who rolled his eyes as you took the shot.

throwing the shot back the burning sensation took over your throat and you could feel it rushing down your throat. you coughed a bit and chugged your drink for comfort “puff you’re going to get shitfaced slow down” matt fully took your cup this time and you were already feeling it. giggling looking up at him “okay now who was going to tell me party’s are fun” you continued giggling.

the music started playing and the slytherin common room was now getting more and more packed. you saw fifth year students and up in here, even a few ravenclaw and hufflepuffs your recognized. to your surprise in the corner of the party you spotted cedric diggory talking to a group of girls holding a drink.

pansy noticed your head being stuck in a certain direction and followed your eyes “oh em gee, someone’s got their eyes on a certain hufflepuff” she winked shoving her shoulder at your “shhhhh he’s just nice to look at” you giggled at her and she giggled along “you two would be soo cute” she added dragging you back to the drinks

“let’s take some shots!” she exclaimed handing you two , you took them smiling and shot them back with her, a woo leaving her mouth. “here chaser, chaser!” she shouted handing you another drink this time what looked like a lot of the punch, downing it all she laughed “girl we’re gonna be gone”. looking around you were seeing doubles of everything but didn’t want the night to already end.

“so, are you a virgin?” pansy shouted over the music making your already alcohol flushed face even redder “pansy!! you can’t just ask that!!” you shouted back flustered at the intrusive question, “i’m only curious girl” she giggled and gave you begging eyes “come onnnn” she shook you till you gave in “fine yes i am but don’t tell anyone!” you replied back as lowly as you could over the music

“who would you lose it to?” she giggled “i lost mine to blaise hehe sshhhh” she winked, considering she just told you her secret you felt obligated and just looked around “i mean i guess cedric” you giggled as she pointed at him after your response. before she could say anything else you felt a pair of hands wrap around your waist and drag you off. trying to kick your way out was useless and they brought you to an empty dorm.

through all of this you couldn’t tell who it was kicking and screaming for them to let you go till you heard mattheos voice “puff calm down it’s just me” he sighed putting you down on what you now assumed was his bed “why did you bring me in here that was so scary” you huffed trying to gain your composure. “diggory?” he scoffed not answering your question.

you looked at him confused as to what he was on about “what do you mean? what about cedric” you cocked your head to the side in confusion “you lost your virginity to him??” he questioned stepping closer to you looking rather.. pissed. you just laughed in response “me? lose my virginity to cedric?.. you’re funny” yeah you fantasized about it but it certainly wouldn’t happen.

“what were you talking to pansy about then??” he looked at you unconvinced, “she asked if i lost it and i said no, but id let him take it.-“ you shrugged “besides you know i tell you everything matt i’ve never even had a boyfriend let alone a guy be interested in my virginity” you sighed laying back onto the bed now feeling upset.

you heard mattheo sigh and you picked your head up to look at him, his eyes stared back at you in silence before breaking it “believe me there’s a lot of guys who want to get in your pants” he rubbed his fists and you gave him a confused expression yet again “what are you on about matt?” you were getting sober just from all of this extra mystery.

he walked over to the bed sitting beside you, “listen when we met you were just.. blooming completely and i would be lying if i didn’t say i first went up to you because of your looks.. well overtime you know we became friends and i noticed other guys staring in ways they shouldn’t have been so i had to teach them a lesson.” he looked at you and yo didn’t know how to respond to something like that.

“what exactly are you saying matt?” you didnt understand what he was poking at, did matt mean to say he basically likes you? were you reading too much into this? “look y/n, no one else in this school fucking deserves you. hell i don’t deserve you but i know i can treat you how you need. don’t ask me what took so long to confess to you y/n, but do you feel even remotely the same?” he let it all out quick and fast, and your mouth dropped.

“you want.. me?” you looked at him in disbelief and he just smiled “that’s what that whole speech was about, yeah” he chuckled nervously awaiting your reply “why?” you sighed still slightly unconvinced “have you fucking seen yourself puff? you’re so undeniably gorgeous, i don’t know how i hold myself back from you everyday” he leaned in closer to you making this all seem more real. without thinking you allowed yourself to lean into him, faces and lips meeting for the most magical first kiss you could’ve ever imagined.

“you’re so fucking beautiful y/n” he grabbed your face pulling you closer to him till you straddled over his lap sitting down continuing the now makeout. “this is so much better than.. imagined” you huffed through the kisses. you could already feel mattheos member growing beneath you and you never thought you’d be the one experiencing this from your best friend.

you’d be lying if you didn’t admit to a fantasy or two about him in the past but this was already one thousand times better than ever imagined. mattheos lips kissed their way down your neck leaving small marks tiny moans leaving your mouth, “i need to hear more of that, y/n, let me eat you out.. please i need a taste” he continued his kisses along your neck bringing them back to your lips “i’ve never- mm yes” you replied as his fingers began making circles over your underwear.

“you sound so good fuck” he groaned pulling you off of him and getting off the bed, “you’re sure of this?” he questioned one last time and you just nodded impatiently awaiting his next move. next thing you knew he was yanking you to the edge of his bed and slowly removing your pants and underwear looking up at you from below. “holy fuck puff.. you’re fucking soaking” he breathed out over your pussy sending tingles down your spine.

without warning his mouth met your untouched area and you felt things never imaginable. his tongue made its way around your bulging clit, flicking it up and down and making his way to your entrance sucking and licking “you taste so good holy fuck” he huffed going right back in not even looking up at you, “can i put two fingers” he spoke from your pussy and you couldn’t even properly answer “mm y-yes” you replied between your moans.

you felt his slender fingers teasing your entrance and he slowly began inching one in and out teasingly, “mattheo-“ you huffed and he chuckled shoving both fingers in, loud moan escaping your mouth and this new feeling. he did a few different moments trying to figure out what makes you moan the most, soon his tongue was sucking expertly on your clit as his fingers twisters and curled inside of you.

“matt i want to.. try” you moaned at this pleasure wanting nothing more than to feel him inside of you now. “mm but you’re not ready yet puff” he continued devouring your pussy simply divulging in it as if he’d never eaten anything before. his pace on everything quickened and you were already near your own orgasm, “if you don’t s-stop i’m gonna cum” you moaned loudly trying to control yourself.

“let go for me sweetheart” he sucked harder on your clit, the nickname and action forcing your orgasm to flood over you harder than you’ve ever been able to make yourself experience. your body was shaking and you couldn’t hold your reactions back, mattheo slowly licked your gushing area clean before standing up “mm now i think you’ll be ready soon” he smirked leaning down over you, grabbing your chin and giving you a kiss.

[badly-drawn-doflamingo]

Brook’s Past, Military and Everything Between [ An Essay kinda ]

Brook’s past is not a thing many people seem to mention or think about, at least in full, however it’s something that's plagued me. Not only as a Brook fan, but simply out of the odd implications it has towards the future, if any. Oda’s planted too many seeds for it to utterly be nothing; there’s so much odd and seemingly out of place comments and facts stated by Brook and others towards this missing history. However, knowing that the show is beginning to near it’s end, due to time, I am unsure of what exactly will be done.

I believe however, for folks' interest and so we can have everything in one place, that compiling everything found so far can be beneficial, so, I have.

Starting with what we know for sure, Brook is from the West Blue, born 90 years ago to a certain kingdom, the same kingdom he was a military convoy leader from. We know this due to a few factors, however it’s still open to debate if it *is* the same kingdom, however seeing as he was shown as a child to already know what fencing is, practicing moves with his bow, I am just going to say he probably was. In any case, other things worth noting, on the topic of childhood, is that Brook seems to have had money. At least, stability.

Compared to a lot of the other strawhats, Brook is shown dressing very nice. No tatters, no tears, shined shoes and a full violin and bow. He also, as already stated, seemed to be exposed to fencing enough to mirror the moves. If this comes from his kingdom, it means he was exposed to it at a young age. Knowing that he was a military convoy leader, this could be taken that perhaps there were military demonstrations, perhaps the kid saw castle guard or other displays; it’s really up in the air.

We know Brook, again as stated before, became a military convoy leader. Now, the definition of what exactly that means can differ.

Wikipedia states; A convoy is a group of vehicles, typically motor vehicles or ships, traveling together for mutual support and protection. Often, a convoy is organized with armed defensive support and can help maintain cohesion within a unit. It may also be used in a non-military sense, for example when driving through remote areas.

This could mean Brook’s job could’ve been accompanying ships for protection, being a knight for his King, mediating information and goods that come in and out of the kingdom. This would make sense on why his speed was needed, a 9.2 ft man being a great choice for a leader.

His weapon also would make sense for this kind of mission, perhaps secrecy being important or at least the ability to be discreet. His cane sword, a ‘Shikomizue’, is not unique however to just him in the show, one other man using one that has been confirmed so far, that being Fujitora. The pair also share a sea, the west, and both utilize iaijutsu (quick draw techniques.) Fujitora blinded himself with said sword because of something apparently so cruel and inhumane that he rather not see anguish. This may be related to Brook’s departure from his kingdom, which is addressed later in this essay. (Fig 3-5.)

Another thing that’s worth mentioning here is Brook’s attack patterns, being unique even for his kingdom apparently. Once again, during the Ryuma fight, Brook states, and I quote;

“Ryuma: “Now tell me, what part of that wretched excuse for a body would you like me to severe with my special ‘Arrow Notch Slash?’ Brook: You don’t know a thing about that move, so do not use it’s name. I use to serve in my kingdom’s raider squad. The quick draw attack that I was most skilled at was ‘Requiem Lebanderole’. My comrades-in-arms renamed it in regards to my fighting technique.”

(Fig. 1, Brook explains his raider squad and move names. A banderole mind you is a long flag for BATTLE crusades. )

This sets up a few interesting facts. 1. Brook was in a raider squad, a kingdom’s group of marauders, as well as if not the same job as convoy leader. 

2. His techniques were unique to him, or at least specialized to a degree of having a nickname. 3. As expected, he seems to have been close to these men he commanded, adding another layer over Brook loosing the Rumbars. Being in both a raider squad and being a convoy leader at one point, if not the same point, implies either Brook was simply versatile, acting in both in separate years or periods. Or, the most likely, that he was higher ranking than expected, making him a CO, or commanding officer. (Lieutenant Colonel is another equal rank for scale, making Brook just below a Major.) This makes him quite the important figure, especially for a kingdom that seems to value its military so much, so much so that a child of Brook’s age would already know about their style of fencing, as expressed already. Brook’s devil fruit is worth mentioning here, the revive-revive fruit not likely to be found by a crew like the Rumbars. It is spoken about as if he has always had it amongst the crew, being a fact of life. However, when did he get that fruit and why? I propose where it would be useful; in combat. If your military convoy leader, your best swordsman could be shot and come right back to protect the king, would he not be utterly invaluable? You would never let him leave… But he DID leave. It’s not said why, however we have some extra tidbits of information that may tell us why, and that ALSO may tell us the answer to what kingdom he means.

( Fig. 2. Brook states his leaving of the military for unknown reasoning, the word certain being used in an odd way, establishing his bounty.) This bounty mind you all is in fact, using inflation method, 297,000,000 berries. That is a MASSIVE bounty for just a pirate. Perhaps a certain blond stole a treasure a kingdom could not replace; their convoy leader. Lets rewind for a moment and cover something that may be seen as off topic however I will come right back to the subject at hand; Calico Yorki. Yorki is an odd bird, pirate wise. He makes his crew read his bounties and information, is never shown to play an instrument/sing but makes his crew preform/they all do, and makes Brook make him dinner. (Steak, and Brook continues to be able to make it as confirmed by an SBS.) What is oddest yet, other than his large crew and shirtless habits, is his nature. A man that set to sea to play music for “orphans and crying children” as stated by himself; a crew made for “any men who love music.” Now, I could be reading into this too hard, however from his speech patterns, to this apparent need for a large family, it seems that singing to orphans may be a very personal goal. An orphan turned pirate perhaps, with lofty dreams and a heart of gold, it reads to me that Yorki may have been just that. Knowing this, orphan or not, we now can compare these facts to Brook’s life up until their meeting. A child who probably grew up being taught to fight, being around access to education, expenses and the kingdom’s training. Why would a man like Brook ever join a man like Yorki, and if it’s only music, would that not make Brook a deserter? I do not think that is the case. I will now bring forward some interesting evidence regarding Brook’s kingdom and WHY he would leave. Germa 66. During Zou to Whole Cake, a few mentions of Germa are made with Brook around, garnering interesting reactions indeed.

( Fig. 3. Brook listens but chooses not to add anything utter than silence, his music pausing as well.) This silence could be take as simple ignorance, however Brook later admits he knows of the kingdom, in fact, he knows a lot. A lot more than anyone else did, Reiju admitting interest in his knowledge and once again, Brook brushes it off.

(Fig 4, 5, Brook speaks about Germa 66.) He seems to underplay or simply not elaborate a LOT on his kingdom, as if something happened. Perhaps joining Yorki was not out of simple cowardice or need to be free, (which again if he did would both reflect poorly upon his entire character and not be in character for him what so ever,) but in fact, out of necessity. It could have been Germa 66, it could have been some other grouping, however I believe this will come to be something important. The kingdom possibilities are interesting as well, and I will list the following LIKELY possibilities. (Other options are known to not be military, like Ohara, or literally places like Thriller Bark itself.) - Toroa - God Valley - Illsia Kingdom - Soja Kingdom The most likely candidates, because again, it is labeled as certain kingdom (Fig 2.) is Toroa or Soja, however I will personally lean into Toroa. This is because of a man by the named of Byron.

(Fig 6. Byron and his information.) His nose and face shape vaguely resemble Brook, however honestly that is a stretch. What is NOT however is his familiar attire, family line and the placement of his kingdom. This could easily be Brook’s home, however again, this is just speculation. Brook very well could belong to God’s Valley, or the same kingdom as Issoh, fleeing because of something he did not agree with or literally could not stand any longer. But, that falls under possibility, not fact. This concludes the facts section, now comes the final question; What does it mean for the story? And, honestly, that can be debated. What Oda has done is plant odd seeds of information about the man, similar to Sanji and his ties to Vinsmoke, that have not been addressed nor talked about in full, or so I’ve found sufficiently. These seeds MAY bloom into what I hope will be a tie into some huge reveal, perhaps aid from a past member of his convoy or kingdom, or perhaps this will only spark conflict. Perhaps it will be minute, Brook being able to aid due to his knowledge, the man already in Thriller Bark showing his prowess by being able to command the strawhats into defeating zombies via salt and tactic. In any case, we can only hope these things mean anything, tied into some huge story that could explain why a man like him would quit for a redneck like Yorki, other than perhaps love, and what kingdom would let a man like him go willingly.

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

Hopefully this doesn't come off as snarky, but I find it genuinely hilarious that every "big-name" Leona fan that I've seen seems to like him against their will lol. I've always had Leona as my favorite, so it's fun to see the journey other people go through to liking/appreciating him!

Look 💦 I can’t speak for other L*ona likers (regardless of size, honestly; I'm a firm believer that one's level of internet fame isn't a factor in the devotion for a character) but for me—to quote Scar—“my words are a matter of pride.” And by confessing to (ick 🤢) LIKING LION… it’s throwing all that pride out of a window. It seriously does feel like these feelings exist against my will.

I have a summary of my story to explain my relationship with the lion lore 💀 I call it a summary, but it’s still kind of long— It's below the cut for those who are interested!

To begin with, the promotional materials didn’t sell me on him. Everything about how he initially presents—from his arrogance to his “tough/bad boy” design (seriously, that biker-cowboy combo of his dorm uniform is SO ugly and shows way too much skin for my liking…)—was so unappealing to me. He seemed exactly like the kind of character and tropes I tend to dislike. The only “good” thing I saw in him was his face (which, ironically, is what Vil says about him) and maybe his UM chant particularly the line where he demands you kneel before him. Then comes along book 2, which is easily the weakest of the main story and does a HUGE disservice to him, making L*ona seem a lot stupider than he actually is. At that point, I had basically written his entire character off. I claimed to all my Twst friends that there was nothing that would ever make me like him.

Around 2022, I decided to get involved in a round of EBG (Epic Bias Game) which is basically like a test of your will?? You’re supposed to compete with your friends to see who can go for the longest without talking about or acknowledging their oshi (which includes not being able to react to fan works of them). As part of EBG, each participant was randomly assigned a “new oshi” to replace the usual one AND GUESS WHAT, I GOT HANDED L*ONA BY THE WHEEL OF FATE 💀

One of my friends (who knew I hardcore hated him at the time) assured me that this would get me to change my mind. They even went out of their way to write a little story explaining how my OC was forced to spend more time with L*ona, which led me into writing interactions between them to build more of the lore. I managed to outlast the friend in EBG, but didn’t win the entire game. I came out of it not really feeling super different about L*ona, but I think forcing myself to write about him extensively helped me gain a little more perspective on his character. I still didn’t like him, but I at least appreciated his presence in the cast a little more.

AND THEN TWST HAD TO COME AND BASH ME OVER THE HEAD WITH L*ONA CONTENT… All the little vignettes and voice lines where other characters would talk about what a good leader he is (*glares at Epel, Jack, Ruggie, Savanaclaw mobs, etc.*), when he sarcastically claims to be a “delicate prince” or a “lost child”, those moments where he sasses others, times when he’s able to use his charisma and/or intelligence to pull ahead, rare instances when he whips out his royal manners, him respecting women… But I think the turning point for me had to have been book 6 OTL GOOD LORD, BOOK 6 FUCKED ME UP 😭 Him using his UM in a creative way to turn falling glass shards into harmless sand? And strategically turning himself in?? Willingly ceding control of the dorm to Ruggie??? Telling everyone about Styx’s lore???? AND THE BEEF HE HAD WITH JAMIL BUT STILL GIVING HIM WISDOM AND ADVICE… Sometimes I still tear up thinking about how L*ona says “You’re not like me,” to Jamil 😔 implying that part of the reason why L*ona guides others is because he has hope in their futures but not his own… (I’m still salty that EN messed up this line by changing it to “I’m not like you,” which makes him come off as way more arrogant 💦) Anyway, I blame book 6 for being the tipping point in my downward spiral 🌀 IT GOT WORSE IN BOOK 7 WHEN HE STARTED SHOWING HE'S MOTIVATED TO ACTUALLY GRADUATE AND TAKES ON AN INTERNSHIP THAT COULD BENEFIT HIS COUNTRY... Special shoutout to the Club Wear card for being especially hot-- I did my best to hold out against the steady drip of content that called attention to his… positive traits… (Not that I’m saying he doesn’t have any; I mean this in that whenever his strengths as a character are brought up, they really get to me as someone who loves intelligent, mature/responsible types and “big brother” figures OTL) BUT IT'S SO HARD WHEN TWST KEEPS PULLING STUFF LIKE THAT???

Then in 2024 came the stupid Lost in the Book with Nightmare Before Christmas event 💀 which finally introduced us to L*ona in full formal attire (MY WEAKNESS) and gave him the opportunity to be in the role of the "hero" and leader... and those Nightmare Suit vignettes 😭 Leona thinking about what it actually means to be "king"... Ugh, it was another strong showing of his character. I'm pretty sure it was this event that started the snowball of my friends (lovingly) bullying me about him and calling me a tsundere about it. Weirdly enough, a BUNCH of things started happening irl to push L*ona at me too. For example, my pet (who usually actively avoids or attacks Twst stuff) was actually eager to pose for a picture with a L*ona standee. In a group fan merch order, I had asked for the bonus Grim sticker but the artist (who had no idea about my complicated thoughts on L*ona) said they were out of the Grim sticker but they had L*ona stickers they could include instead. Most recently, I had just finished this last-minute artwork of Miss Raven eating pocky by herself to celebrate Pocky Day (11/11). Typically the fan art you'd see on this day would involve two characters playing the "Pocky Game" (in which the players try to eat a stick of pocky from either end; usually it's framed as romantic since meeting in the middle results in a kiss). However, I had chosen to do a solo Miss Raven art because I thought this suited her "I want to be taken seriously!" personality better. Well, guess what? I GOT A PACKAGE DELIVERY NOTIFICATION FOR THE TWST MERCH ORDER... WITH L*ONA IN IT 💀 Almost like he heard there was food meant for sharing and he came to claim it for himself... Like I literally did NOT choose for these things to happen to me, THEY HAPPENED ON THEIR OWN. I DON'T BELIEVE IN PREORDAINED EVENTS BUT THE UNIVERSE SURE IS WORKING IN STRANGE WAYS.

So now that the tables have turned, it’s really embarrassing. Everything is coming back to bite me in the butt… It truly feels like L*ona plotted this all along and was on the prowl, patiently waiting for me to get worn down before he pounces and delivers the final blow to my ego OTL Like, it's gotten to the point where many of my long-time friends in the Twst community are now joking that "It's over" for J word... ONE OF THEM EVEN TOLD ME IT FEELS LIKE I'M GETTING DIVORCED AND L*ONA IS THEIR NEW STEPDAD, HOW AM I SUPPSOED TO FEEL ABOUT HTHAT ??????????? ? ? ????? ? ??? ? ?? ?? ? ???? ?

But by the far the worst, the WORST part about everything here is that if L*ona were fully sentient, he would be so smug about recent developments 😡 It makes me SO mad thinking about how he'd look down on me with that hot smug rage-inducing smirk of his and make fun of me for eating my words so badly.

“What was that you said about hating my guts, herbivore? … Hah, it's written all over your face--you're terrible at hiding your true feelings. You can just give in, you know. Tell me how much you worship me. How much you want me. You'll give in eventually one way or another--so why not make this easier for the both of us and save us the time of playing the wait game? I don't bite, promise." (<- a liar)

(Disclaimer: NOT MY MERCH; this is a L*ona Liker friend’s picture that they’re letting me use as a reaction image 😅)

THIS IS FR MY OVERBLOT ORIGIN STORY…

[felassan]

WBUR article: ''Dragon Age: The Veilguard' creators on their new vision for the fantasy series'

Rest of post under cut due to length and possible spoilers.

“Expectations are so high — whether from the fans of the franchise or the perspective of the company — there’s tremendous pressure.” says game director Corinne Busche. “One thing I’ll say about this team: They really rise to the occasion.” [...] “We sort of lost our way in a couple of previous titles, moving away from that character-focused storytelling that made ‘Mass Effect’ and ‘Dragon Age’ a success,” says John Epler, “Dragon Age” series creative director. “This project really coalesced when we consciously identified that central aspect of the experience: the characters.” “Veilguard” puts players in the shoes of an unlikely leader to a small band of rebels — think “Oceans 11” meets “The Fellowship of the Ring.” “It’s a deeply personal experience,” says Busche. “You’re creating your own character and that might be a representation of you, that might be reflective of the kinds of choices you'd like to make.” For the first time in BioWare history, that customizability allows player avatars to be transgender and access unique dialogue options around that identity. There’s also a prominent storyline about a party member coming out as nonbinary. “I'm an openly queer trans woman — I really believe that representation matters,” says Busche. “Everyone is welcome in ‘Dragon Age,’ and we want people to see themselves and feel like they can have a heroic place here.” [...]"

"4 questions for Corinne Busche and John Epler What makes “Dragon Age” stand apart from other fantasy games? Corinne Busche: “‘Dragon Age’ is a franchise that’s fundamentally always been about this really authentic team of companions that come together to take on insurmountable challenges. It's about people. It touches on some pretty deep themes as well. Injustices. The burdens of leadership. It really is about establishing this sense of found family to take on these challenges that lay ahead.” What feels different from previous iterations? John Epler: “I'd say this version of the game is much bigger in its storytelling, in its scope. We really wanted to put you in every one of the big story moments. So as an example, it's the difference between watching the Battle of Minis Tirith versus being someone who's fighting in the middle of it. You're much more participatory in it. We wanted you to feel like you were part of these big world-changing events. You were right in the thick of it and really focusing on making the story that is so big and epic feel personal just by how you interact with it.” What sort of hero is the player character, Rook?  Epler: “One thing we wanted to steer away from very consciously was the sense of them being a chosen one because that's something we've done previously. They are the right person in the right place at the right time. But there is always a core personality to them. They are always going to be someone who needs to pull together this small but somewhat dysfunctional group and really lead them in a way that makes sense for that team.” Busche: “And it's one of the interesting aspects of each new game having a different protagonist. We do have a true blank slate, some say in ‘Dragon Age: Origins.’ I would put the Inquisitor in that category. Whereas Hawke in ‘Dragon Age 2’ has a very bespoke identity. So we kind of strike a balance between that. One of the defining properties of Rook, who they are as a character, is this idea of someone who's very competent, but as a leader, they're learning how to shoulder this responsibility.” You’ve put a lot of blood and sweat into this game. It’s nearly out. Have people already been telling you stories about how they connect with it? Busche: “Absolutely. One of the reasons that I felt so honored, so privileged to be able to join this team and work on this franchise is so rarely have I seen a game or a piece of media, for that matter, that connects with people so deeply. There's a real sense of ownership and an affinity for the franchise. It's a rare thing.” Epler: “I'll share a very personal anecdote about this game and people connecting. So I wrote the follower Bellara. Early on while we were making this game, I got a diagnosis of ADHD. So I'm writing this character who has a lot of the same mannerisms, a lot of the same views of the world, in a very specific way. And hearing people online, connecting to this character in the way she speaks and the way she interacts, they were able to point to and say, ‘That's me, that's how I deal with the world.’ And it's just such a cool feeling to have someone connect with a character you create and be able to say, ‘I felt seen in a way that I've never felt seen in a game before.’”"

[source]

[cno-inbminor]

praestigia (pt. 1)

four months into my hyperfixation on this man, i barely managed to get some of this off my chest lol. thx sylus for being my first lads fic!

plot: formally speaking, sylus is a...sponsor. more colloquially, he's your sugar daddy -- and you're starting to wonder if he might actually want more. (wc: ~5.1k)

cw: this is all AU and does not include, like, any game lore (aside from that it's happening in linkon city). reader is a phd student, suggestive content (this is buildup for the smut in part 2), angst, a few dashes of fluff, not fully edited. mdni!

[ao3 link]

-

The skyline of Linkon City never fails to captivate you, blinking lights of tall, corporate buildings, the specks of light dotted across the sky, the blur of beams weaving through the roads – no matter which angle you look at it from, the view will inevitably take reign over your focus. So much so, that you do not notice the imposing figure approaching you from behind. He can only draw your attention by placing both hands on your shoulders, jumping slightly as you blink and remember where you are. A wave of flashbacks crashes through your mind as you are gently turned towards him, your back facing the window now. 

“Perhaps I should find it somewhat offensive that the view never fails to take your attention away,” Sylus remarks, his tone unmasked in his teasing and playfulness. His scarlet eyes peer past your shoulder to see if there was anything interesting or out of the ordinary. “Do I need to start booking rooms without windows?” 

“Don’t be silly,” you gently admonish, moving past him to grab a drink of water. His eyes burn the skin on your back, though you are familiar with this gaze. “Thank you for letting me rest here.” 

“Do you really think that after all this time, I would leave you to pay for a hotel room yourself? Or to find your own transportation home?”

“It’d be understandable. I can see where you would be coming from if you made those requests.” 

“I must say, I am a little wounded, kitten,” he drawls in mock pain. Instead of waiting for you to return and remain close to him, he situates himself on the bed first and leaves ample room for you to lay next to him. 

The gesture invokes warmth, exudes comfort, and stands familiar as you climb onto the mattress with ease and memory. Sylus stretches out his arm next to you, and his pose quietly begs for you to cuddle into him. 

And so you do. Sylus’s stature and frame, of course, never fails to envelop you during these moments of tranquility. Your chest pressed against his side, a leg crossed over his, your nails drawing patterns over his bathrobe and exposed abdomen – security, strength, and affection, once again, never fails to help you relax. 

Because this is what happens after every gala, every fundraiser, every grand opening, every social event that you accompany Sylus to. This routine of being in hotel rooms so high above ground with breathtaking views, burrowing into him, oftentimes burying himself inside you, and separating the next morning with an implicit understanding of exactly where you stand, is what you two had agreed upon all those months ago. And in return, your financial stress disappears into thin air, leaving you to study and engage in hobbies without such a heavy burden on your shoulders. 

Despite his constant reassurances that he can clean up whatever mess you may end up making, they do not negate just how tiring and draining these events end up being. Constantly putting on airs, overexposing your practiced smiles, making sure that there is not a single hair out of place, switching to what you like to call “fancy people table etiquette” – Sylus sponsored and, in a way, hired you to be as close to perfect as possible, and so, you must do as such to uphold your end of this business relation. Tonight has been a little more taxing than usual, as somewhere along the way, he felt the need to buy you anything that captured your attention for more than a few seconds. He would bid a ridiculous price that would dissuade any other potential customers, their expressions of defeat when they pass by causing him to secretly gloat that everyone has learned at least one thing about him: he will get what he wants. 

You had caught onto this shenanigan after the third item, and you made sure to school your gaze away from the auctioned items. But because he always seems to know what plays in your mind, he complains, “You never let or ask me to buy you things anymore.” 

Your eyes had closed shut during your time of reflecting on tonight’s events, and they continue to remain as such. “I have very little closet space. At this point, I think I’ve probably swapped out 90% of my wardrobe because of you. People are starting to get suspicious.” 

“Then why not move out and find a bigger apartment? You know I can afford it.” 

“Sylus–” 

“I know, I know,” he interrupts. If he were anyone else, you would have scowled at him. “It would be too far from campus, become inconvenient, and you feel it is too much to ask for.” 

As the conversation suggests, this is not the first time Sylus has brought up this proposition. What remains unsaid is how you would be closer to his residence if you were to move to one of the many apartments he had in mind, all of which would reduce your commute to his place down to walking a block or two; not a twenty minute drive. 

“Just say the word, and it will be done,” Sylus murmurs into your hair. When he realizes he has received no response, your soft snoring greets him before he can inquire any further. With a heavy sigh, he reaches out and switches the nightstand light off, leaving the darkness to swallow you both. His eyes fall shut in tired ease, but his grip around your shoulders remains firm. 

-

It comes to no one’s surprise that you feel less than well-rested when your alarm starts blaring at 5:45AM. You had an early class today, so you had to give yourself ample time to make it home, change, wipe away any lingering smudges of last night’s makeup, and try to appear as…casual as possible. Not wanting to wake him up so much that he cannot fall back asleep, you reach out for your phone and click one of the volume buttons, rendering it silent. Sometime in the night, your position had changed to Sylus spooning you. His limb slung over your waist is heavy, making it all that more difficult to leave – not just physically, but mentally as well. 

Like ripping a bandaid off, you have every intention to quickly remove yourself from his embrace. But Sylus, being the infuriatingly light sleeper that he is, immediately tightens his hold around you as soon as you attempt your escape. 

“Sylus, I need to go,” you whisper. 

He presses you impossibly closer to him. “I will drive you to your apartment. Sleep.” 

“No, I’m taking the subway.” 

“Why take the subway when you have me?” 

“If anyone needs rest, it’s you,” you say pointedly, because it’s true. Being the CEO of a business that may or may not be totally legal (you never ask because honestly, the less you know, the better) is not exactly a 9AM-5PM job. There have been more times than you can count when he would be pounding into you and forced to take a phone call. Granted, that doesn’t stop him from grinding into you and grinning devilishly when you bury your face into the nearest pillow to muffle your moans and whines. 

“Speak for yourself,” he grumbles into your hair. “You haven’t gotten more than six hours of sleep every night for the last week.” 

“And how exactly do you know this?” As soon as you ask, you already know the answer. 

The app for– “Your smartwatch.”

“One of these days, I will disconnect my account from that app.”

“I would like to see you try.” 

And you will. Just, when you’re not trapped in his arms. 

“I’m still taking the subway,” you backtrack, though your voice is quieter than before. A tiny sense of relief fills you when his embrace loosens, and you can finally crawl out of bed. It’s harder than it seems to squash the distressed voice in your head complaining about how easy it was for him to let you go. As you pick up all your clothes and make your way towards the bathroom, you notice his phone sitting innocently by the room’s coffee machine. After looking over your shoulder, you swipe it off the counter and bring it with you. 

Guessing his passcode is harder than you thought – the man has an ego the size of the entire universe, so you figure it would be something personal: his inaugural date as CEO, his birth year, his birthday, or others. On your last, desperate attempt, you type in four digits and find yourself absolutely floored at the view of his, now, unlocked phone. 

Your birthday. 

There is no time to dwell on the implications of it all, and you chalk it up to the fact that no one really knows you outside of being his typical date or escort. Therefore, the passcode would be that much harder to guess than the route that you had originally gone for. Yes, that’s all it was: an extra layer of security. 

Sylus’s phone is surprisingly unorganized, random apps thrown into folders that they do not belong in, leaving you to search for the fitness app that your watch is not only connected to on your own phone, but somehow also on his. You press the buttons necessary to delete your watch data from his end. When you are ready to close the app, you cannot help but notice the preview of his messages app and the texts within. Your thumb swipes away the fitness app and shakily taps the messages window that stared hauntingly at you. It had been left open on a conversation with another woman, if you had to guess based on the name sitting at the top. 

My parents are getting antsy, and so is your grandfather. 

That is none of my concern. 

Unfortunately, it is. They’re not exactly happy about the woman you keep bringing as a partner. 

Our arranged marriage is not a publicly known detail. 

And I’d like to keep it that way. But Sylus…

What?

We can’t delay this much longer. You’re running out of time. 

The exchange tells you enough, just enough for you to realize the situation you find yourself in. You suddenly recall an incident in the beginning of this relationship with Sylus when he described this arrangement, him as your sugar daddy, as a means to an end, preferably the end of something that he clearly did not want out of desire for his own freedom. There was not enough detail for you to give it much thought after that night of discussion and negotiation, but now, it all makes sense. 

Your thumb takes it back to his home screen and presses the lock button. In a haze, you get ready and dressed before exiting the bathroom, completely unaware if you even have your clothes on right or your hair somewhat kempt. As quietly as possible, you place his phone back where you had found it. Though common practice at this point, it now feels far too intimate to plant a featherlight kiss on his cheek. It causes him to stir, but you’re halfway out the door before he can fully register your departure. 

Whoever passes by, whatever zooms past, however something tries to gain your attention, you have no recognition of your surroundings. A thick layer of tension settles itself into your brain, allowing you to think of nothing but the fact that this entire time, Sylus has been in an arranged marriage that you, apparently, were supposed to be instrumental in destroying. To find yourself back in your apartment maybe forty minutes later is a miracle in and of itself. You return to the plane of reality when you open your closet doors to toss your dirty clothes into the hamper and are greeted by the many items bought with his money. 

Contrary to popular belief, jealousy does not make itself known in your system. You’re not exuding shades of green or red like an angry Christmas tree. If anything, you come to a quiet acceptance that this…partnership with Sylus will come to an end, and soon. It would do no good for him to keep seeing or supporting you while formally married, which means you have to get your life in order. Sylus has given you more than enough money to put you through your last two years of your postgraduate career and maybe a year into your postdoc, but you should still remain frugal. If you’re lucky enough, the money you earn during postdoc would be enough to live relatively comfortably on. 

Alone. Without him.

It’s fine, you think to yourself as you turn on the shower. It’s totally and completely fine.

-

A couple hours later in class, your phone vibrates with a message that reads, “You actually managed to disconnect your watch from my phone.” 

The slight smirk tugging at your lips is inevitable as you type out a response: You told me to try, so I did. 

“I will be changing my passcode.” 

If you want. There’s nothing else on there that I need to delete, right? 

“Oh sweetie, wouldn’t you like to know?” 

The subtle, possessive curl of his message coils around you tenderly, making you temporarily forget that you are in class and should be exhibiting a poker face. But you still shift in your seat, a warm pool of heat forming in your core as you imagine his expression and his voice reading the message out loud. Forever a tease and a flirt, Sylus knows exactly what he is doing by sending you that message. 

Your best revenge in the moment is to leave him on read, on the edge of his metaphorical seat. It takes too much effort to bring your conscience back to your current lecture and actually take some notes. Your phone buzzes once, but you ignore it – and in hindsight, you’re glad you did. Sylus, in all his infinite wisdom and glory, took it upon himself to send you a picture of himself after a shower – the skin of his chest glistening under the fluorescent lights, grey towel hung low on his waist and barely holding on, veins on his arms frustratingly visible because he knows what they do to you, his biceps flexed just enough that you want to take a bite at them. The fucker full well knew you were in class and, you know, in relatively close proximity to other people who would have, no doubt, gotten an eyeful. 

As you walk towards the subway station to go back to your apartment, head down and focused on typing out a message, a giddy smile can’t help but break out across your face. Your thumbs tap, “Should you really be sending photos like this to someone who, in the public’s eye, is just a friendly escort?” 

After not even thirty seconds, your phone buzzes, the notification of his call sliding in from the top of your screen. You almost roll your eyes as you bring the device to your ear. “You have five minutes before I lose signal underground,” you warn, your tone still playful nevertheless. 

“‘A friendly escort’, you say? I suppose that’s what the young ones are calling intimacy these days.” 

“You knew I was in class. And stop it, I know you have some stupid smug look on your face right now,” you chastise. 

“You know me so well.”

“Actually, speaking of,” you say as your eyes flit down to your watch. “Aren’t you supposed to be in a meeting right now?” 

“I stepped out.”

Your heart and feet skip a beat, almost causing you to fall flat on your face and absolutely eat shit in the middle of the sidewalk. It’s hard not to let your mind race at all the implications, that this tirelessly busy man decided in a heartbeat that he would step out with a desire to call you over something so minor; to simply tease you. In the grand scheme of his life, you have very little significance – your temporary companionship where you may see him four or five times a month, sometimes with weeks in between and other times mere days. Text messages were never a guaranteed daily activity, though as of recent, he has been texting you more often. But amidst his employees, his connections, his partnerships, his family, you’re just…you. 

You didn’t realize you had been stunned into silence long enough for him to ask, “Are you still there?”

“I am, sorry,” you apologize, scrambling to think of an excuse. “Uhh, an email came in and I was reading it. Didn’t hear you.” 

“I’ll get you some wireless earbuds.” 

“Please don’t.” Your rejection is immediate, firm. The lack of room left for argument stands apparent. “That’s not necessary.” 

“And what’s stopping me from just ordering you a pair regardless?”

“Me.”

Sylus responds with a contemplative pause, which is...unusual. He has always been so quick to reply with wit and banter, but there is a chance that maybe something distracted him, like what you had said as a poor attempt at a viable excuse. 

“I suppose the kitten is starting to make use of her claws now.” His voice rings softer, quieter, almost as if disheartened by his own statement. “First you disconnect your watch, and now you won’t even let me buy you earbuds.”

“I just don’t want you to buy anything that’s not necessary. Covering my tuition and all the dresses is one thing, but wireless earbuds, I can do without. My wired ones work just fine.” 

Your eyes catch the sign for the stairs leading down to the subway up ahead. “I’m about to go under and lose signal. Was there anything else?” 

“Come over tonight.” 

Your mouth works faster than your brain. “I can’t,” you lie, a pang of guilt creeping into your heart. “There’s a study group tonight for an exam.” Not a lie. “Besides, we just saw each other yesterday.” 

“Has that ever stopped us before?” 

“W-well, no,” you splutter because it’s true. There have been a handful of times when you spent two, sometimes three consecutive nights in the past – but things were more hot-and-heavy then, a time when you couldn’t get enough of him and vice versa. “I’m just saying.” 

“Then come after the study group.”

“It’s gonna run pretty late because we have an exam in a few days.” Again, not a lie. “Who knows if the subways would still be running by then?” 

“I’ll pick you up.”

“But you might be asleep.” 

“Highly unlikely, little one.”

Quickly looking around you, you quietly hiss, “Sylus, you should be asleep by the time the subways stop running. Why would you still be up at 2AM?” 

“In case I have to refresh your memory, you do remember that I am the CEO of one of the largest tech companies in Linkon, right? The work never ends.”

“You need time for sleep, you know, like everyone else??”

“I’m not like everyone else.”

Your eyes close in frustration as you groan. Your feet have reached the top of the stairs, and you couldn’t have asked for more perfect timing. “Okay, I’m at the station so I’m gonna hang up. I’ll come over another time, alright? Talk to you later.” 

“Sweetie–”

Moving forward to clamber down the stairs and smashing the hang up button is your way of desperately trying to not lose resolve. Any longer, you would have given in and rolled yourself straight back to square one with nothing but dread. You have never been more relieved to see the little “No Signal” sitting in the top left corner while you swipe through a gate and manage to get down another flight of stairs without tripping over your feet. 

Wired earbuds in, hands stuffed into the pocket of your hoodie, letting the wind tunnel threaten you to topple over, you do everything in your ability to not think about him – to not think about the messages that may flood your phone once you get signal, to not think about the pushback you may receive because Sylus is someone who figures out to, somehow, always get his way, and to not think about the weight of his earlier words: “I stepped out.” You pretend that you know nothing about this arranged marriage, the curiosity having caused your thumbs to twitch in anticipation at maybe looking up who this woman is. You ignore the now glaringly close deadline that will terminate your relationship with Sylus forever, and most of all, you ignore any semblance of pain that knowledge makes you feel. 

Cup half-empty, spoons tossed the window, the subway window across from you is greeted with a blank stare. In a rare moment of mindfulness (or is it dissociation?), you think of nothing until you find yourself standing by the foot of your bed and ready to face plant into the middle of the duvet. With your last shred of working consciousness, you set an alarm for thirty minutes before the start of the study group and promptly fall asleep.

-

As you predicted, the study group runs late into the night. Despite the several digressions into conversations that were very much not academics-related, all of you feel relatively good about the subject matter for the exam on Friday. Everyone comes to a unanimous decision to reconvene in a couple of days. Given that it was Monday, one more study session Wednesday and some independent review Thursday night would be beneficial. 

For your own sanity, you had left your phone, stashed in the recesses of your backpack tossed into the corner of the study room, on do-not-disturb for the entirety of the night. You had it programmed to still chime and alert you if family contacted you, mainly because it doesn’t happen often, and if it does, that means something big happened. The device remained silent for the whole time, and part of you wants to avoid confronting what your notification screen might look like. But before you can muster up the courage to do so, one of your friends speaks up. 

“Hey, you took the subway here, right? I can drive you home,” Jiho, a doctoral student in the same year as you but doing research under a different professor, offers. A part of you is beyond relieved at the perfect example of an excuse to not check your phone because it would be so incredibly rude (not really) in a social context.

“You wouldn’t mind? If you have somewhere to be, I can just walk.” 

Jiho rolls his eyes in a playful manner. “Come on, before I change my mind.” 

He drops you off in front of your apartment complex about ten minutes later, and he shoos away your offer to buy him coffee as a token of gratitude. You wave goodbye as his car pulls out of a guest parking spot, and only then do you notice the conspicuously sleek, grey sports car sitting a few meters away. Your heart pounds, and your palms begin to sweat as you get closer and closer to your unit, afraid of who you might find once you get inside. You spot the fluorescent glow from underneath peering out from underneath your door, and it takes everything in you to not drop your keys as you unlock the deadbolt. 

“So the kitten has finally decided to come home.” 

“How–” 

Sylus, looking severely out of place in your humble abode, sets down the stack of papers in his hand on your coffee table. With his other hand, he points to the fixture on your wall by the door where your keys typically hang. His own set now occupies one of the hooks, and you spot the spare key you had given him a few months ago. To your knowledge, he has never used it before, and you can count the number of times he has stepped into this apartment on one hand. 

You quietly shut the door behind you, locking both deadbolts in place before setting your backpack down. “It’s so late,” and even you wince at the shakiness in your voice. “You should be asleep. At home.” 

“Perhaps I would be if someone had just checked their phone once in the last fifteen hours.” 

Well, you don’t have much of an excuse for that. 

Sylus sits on one end of your couch in loungewear, though somehow he still makes it seem like he’s in something formal enough for business casual. You cautiously sit on the other end away from him. 

“I passed out as soon as I got home, and then I was running late for the study group, so I just left my phone on do-not-disturb.” 

His silence speaks volumes. 

“I didn’t mean to worry you.” 

But maybe you did.

Maybe, subconsciously, you did. Maybe you wanted to test the limits of his affection. Maybe you wanted to see just how far he would go to make sure you were okay. 

Maybe you simply wanted to get a taste of when you least expect radio silence, an appetizer for how things may turn out when Sylus calls for the end of your arrangement. 

“Look at me.” 

Tension weighs you down as you slowly turn your body towards his, but you avoid his gaze and aim to study the logo on his shirt instead. 

“Sweetie, look at me.” 

The command snaps you into compliance, his tone firm and undeniable. You expect to see anger, frustration, disappointment. After all, it would make sense, for there is a set of expectations and rules put into place to ensure trust between both parties. Transactional, contractual, institutional obligations and conditions set by both the company matchmaker and individuals are put in place to conveniently manifest and quickly disintegrate these business relations, to avoid messes. 

But you realize all too quickly that the mess will be inevitable, in your case, because instead of tinges of red fury in his eyes, you find concern, worry, and confusion. Dread sinks into your stomach like an anchor in the middle of the ocean, dropping further and further into the dark unknown. 

“You’re hiding something from me.” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you immediately counter. Good job, you just made it more obvious. 

Sylus pins you down with a look that means nothing other than “you know better”, and your heart threatens to burst from your chest out of sheer anxiety. 

“Since you refuse to tell me otherwise, tell me how you got home,” he says, and though he may seem cool and nonchalant in the way he rests an arm against the back of the couch, you can see the irritation pulsing through the veins on his forearms. 

“A friend from the study group drove me home.” 

“And you were simply too busy to look at your phone during the drive?” 

“I had to give him directions.” 

Sylus cocks an eyebrow at the mention of this friend’s gender. “Him?”

“Jiho, sweet guy. Does research with another professor.” 

“I suppose I have him to thank for bringing you home safely. Regardless, you should have called me to pick you up.” 

You have one last card to play. “That’s not in the contract.” 

His eyes harden and narrow the slightest bit, the curve of his jaw tensing in building irritation. “How so?”

“There’s a line somewhere in there about making sure I would not contact you for personal favors that are outside the scope of our,” you hesitate to find the right words, “relationship.”  You can’t remember the last time your palms sweat so much. 

“I offered.” 

“And I am not obligated to take the offer. While kind, I did not see the need to bother you.”

“I clearly remember stating that it wouldn’t be an issue, especially considering I asked you to stay with me for the night.” 

“But I told you I couldn’t,” you retort. 

“Couldn’t or wouldn’t?” 

The bitter note in his voice on his last word matches his steely gaze that seems determined to pick you apart, to peel off each layer of whatever walls you may have put up. He’s not ignorant or oblivious by any means – something is going on, and you’re not telling him. You answer him with deafening silence, blaming your late night fatigue for it. 

Responding directly to his question would only make this worse, as you cannot see yourself getting out of the ensuing conversation unscathed and alive. Instead, the couch dips as you cross the distance between you two, hesitantly straddling his hips in case he doesn’t want you to. But he allows your move, his hands almost instinctively resting on your thighs as you settle yourself into his hold. His skin feels glassy smooth beneath your fingers as you caress his cheek, studying every detail of his face and avoiding his eyes. 

Perhaps there is a part of you that is trying to commit the minutiae to memory in preparation for the days when you will no longer see him so intimately. You should have never let yourself get so attached, no matter how much tenderness and adoration Sylus has been absolutely spoiling you with. The realization hits you in a bittersweet manner, and the featherlight kiss you place on his lips only makes it hurt more. 

Yet you move past the pain to accept the fall, the descent into oblivion as you feel Sylus respond to your kiss, deepening and increasing in fervor. The heat in your core is more than just lust as it sinks deeper and deeper into you, a testament to the depth of your affections. Somehow, his touch as his hands roam your figure burns hotter. It almost makes you want to shy away from his grasp, but part of you welcomes the trails of fire as your punishment for deceiving him. 

You gasp out his name as his lips leave your neck scorching, each nip of his teeth and lave of his tongue adding to the haze slowly overtaking your rationale. But beneath the man’s ardor, you manage to recognize his irritation and annoyance  –  the way his fingers grip your waist, his nails digging into your back – about how this whole night has progressed. 

Apologize, his eyes seem to scream. Seek forgiveness as I seek vengeance, his hands draw on your skin. 

Beg for me.

---

[tbc]

[calware]

You might've answered something like this before but how do you pick colours for your art? Your choices are always so striking, visually interesting and delightful. I would love to learn your ways. (also hi)

WAAHHHH THANK YOU <3 <3 (also hi!!) first of all i do have a post from quite a while back with some general tips that you can check out, but my process has changed a bit since then so i can definitely elaborate a little bit more!

observation

this first tip is not very straightforward (sorry) but something i try to do is pay attention to the colors and lighting in the real world and try to remember what moments really stick with me. like when you're watching the sunset and the light from the sky washes everything in pink and tints the buildings orange, or when it's dusk and the light blue of the sky contrasts with the dark blues of everything that's in shadow, or looking in a lake and all the greens, browns, and blues mix together in rich jewel tones

i try to keep track of these things & the emotions they make me feel (almost like taking notes in a mental journal) so i can try referencing them when i want a certain drawing to feel a certain way. AGAIN this is really not straightforward and i don't really know how helpful it actually is...? but i find that observation can be a really helpful tool and i find myself doing it a lot

references

sort of the same as the last point BUT using preexisting photos and artwork instead! this one is more straightforward because you can actually reference them as you are drawing. i said this in the other post i made but i think that looking at other images and asking yourself "how is the artist/photographer using the colors to make it look this way? how do i recreate that?" and using that as a way to study their use of colors can be really helpful. if you find a drawing that has cool colors, try using those colors in your own drawings and see how they look!

that said, i would try to avoid color-picking things directly because i find that if you try choosing them on your own you 1) gain a better understanding of what you're doing 2) have more control over what you're doing and 3) you can "push" your colors in ways you might not if you color-pick directly

play with contrasting hues

i think this might just be a personal preference, but i find that i'm not as big of a fan of monochromatic images, and i prefer it when drawings utilize a wide variety of hues. this goes especially for ones that implement more contrast in the hues (not necessarily where the colors have more contrast in value, but rather contrast as in they're further apart on the color wheel)

for example, in this drawing, everything is washed in green light except for rose's skin, which is a very saturated reddish-brown. this is sort of what i mean by "pushing" the colors because, in a realistic setting, a person sitting in green lighting is going to have a more greenish-looking skin tone (like in this drawing). you can see this in how the whites of the drawing—her hair and eyes—are greenish, but i made the stylistic choice to not do the same with her skin to create contrast between the two hues

i edited the one on the bottom to match the green-ness of the rest of the image, and the effect is pretty noticeable! green light makes people look less lively, almost sickly (which is good to use if that's the feeling you want to show, of course)

another small example of this is in this drawing where i use a couple of different hues in davesprite's body. overall, it registers as orange, but i like to ever-so-slightly introduce a bit of green to contrast with the orange, letting the lightest values tip into the greens instead of stopping at yellow to contrast with the muted red in the wings. the darkest values are purple, which also contrasts with the yellow parts. the only hue missing from this image is blue! the colors are all still analogous, and the greens and purples are a lot less saturated than the oranges and yellows, so nothing clashes and overall leads to a more subtle contrast

the colors on the top are the ones from the image, while the ones on the bottom i see used a lot more commonly—which isn't a bad thing! i just think it looks nice to use a wide range of hues because of the way they complement each other :)

other than these strategies, my process varies greatly depending on what i'm working on, so it's difficult to get any more specific than this (unless you'd like to ask about the process of a specific drawing!) there isn't really any step-by-step method i use for every drawing i make, usually i am doing something different each time based on the goals i have for the project

[cosmerelists]

Are Various Cosmere Characters a Cat Person or a Dog Person?

Sanderson was once asked whether Kelsier and/or Marsh would be a cat or a dog person, although not everyone was satisfied with his answer (@zephyscosmere). So, inspired by that post, I thought I'd deliver my own headcanons about whether various Cosmere characters would be a cat or a dog person if, you know, such animals existed in their part of the Cosmere.

(I should mention for full transparency that I am 100% a cat person. Will that affect my headcanons? Probably!)

1. Adolin: Dog Person

Not only is Adolin a golden retriever, but he would also have a golden retriever, and he would play approximately one thousand hours of frisbee with it per day.

2. Sadeas: Cat person

I simply cannot shake the image of Sadeas & Ialai plotting together...but also there is a big white fluffy Persian cat with them. If that's wrong then I don't want to be right.

3. Shallan: Cat Person

I'm torn on this, and I'll be interested to hear what you all think. But I feel like when Shallan was essentially on house arrest for most of her life, she had cats, and that they kept her company in her room and napped while she was drawing. And although cats therefore remind her a little bit of a bad time in her life, it wasn't the cat's fault, and she still likes them.

4. Hoid: Cat Person

Hoid is 150% a cat person. I can't even really explain this. I just feel it so strongly in my soul.

5. Vin: Dog Person

I mean, I kinda hate to say this, given that the only actual dog Vin ever bought she also killed immediately. But Vin is kind of canonically a dog person, given her relationship with TenSoon.

6. Hrathen: Cat Person

I'm realizing as I write this that I associate "plotter" with "cat person." But again, I can see Hrathen with a cat. I can see the cat sitting on his shoulder, looking somehow just as arrogant as Hrathen himself, and hissing at Sarene.

7. Kaladin: Dog Person

As much as Kaladin himself is a cat, he would nevertheless be a dog person, I feel. He'd be tromping through Hearthstone as a child with his loyal dog by his side, and as a Radiant he'd give his dog goggles when he needs to fly it around.

8. Gavilar: Dog Person

Gavilar only likes things that are very loyal to him.

9. Moash: Cat Person

Cats have definite boundaries, and if they don't like you, they let you know it. I feel like that would resonate with Moash.

10. Vivenna: Dog Person

This is just instinct, like my "Hoid is a cat person" headcanon. But I feel like Vivenna--and especially Azure--is a dog person.

11. Elend: Cat Person

I think Elend reads thick tomes with a cat on his lap. I also think Vin is cat-like, and that Elend likes her.

12. Vasher: Cat Person

I just think that since Vasher is a prickly misanthropist, that he would like to have another, smaller, fuzzier prickly misanthropist on his side.

13. Tress: Dog Person

[SPOILERS INCOMING!! WHOOP! WHOOP!] I think if your boyfriend has spent any time as a rat being terrorized by cats, you kinda have to be a dog person rather than a cat person.

14. Jasnah: Cat Person

Weirdly, the logic here is the same as it is for Moash. I think Jasnah would appreciate a cat's autonomy and unwillingness to pretend to like people.

15. Painter: Cat Person

He's an antisocial artist. I mean, that says "cat" right?

16. Lightsong: Cat Person

I've said in a previous list, if there were any justice in this world, Lightsong would have an incredibly spoiled Persian cat with him at all times.

17. Breeze: Neither

I don't think Breeze wants fur of any type to get on his clothes.

18. Allrianne: Dog Person

Specifically, one of those dogs you can carry around in your purse and which has a pink sparkly collar.

19. Steris: Cat Person

Cats have rules and strict schedules. Steris would appreciate that.

20. Wax: Both

In the Roughs, Wax had an immaculately fluffy cat who sat on his shoulder and kept primly grooming itself. In the city, Wax has a wonky-looking mutt who slobbers a lot. Wax loves them both.

[m-says-hi]

Hello!

I have more sampo thoughts! Surprisingly, not about the recent event but an old event. Or not even the event itself, but something from after it

The memory bubble you get after Aetherium Wars.

Couple of things about memory bubbles before I bring up Sampo or this particular bubble’s contents. After some (admittedly brief) research on bubbles, I’ve learned they’re created by Memokeepers to preserve memories and are usually stolen from the original memory holder. In the game there are 21 memory bubbles. 20 of them belong to Herta and can be found around the Space Station. The last one is the one from after Aetherium Wars and is found on Jarilo VI.

I haven’t interacted with any of the memory bubbles myself, but I have read through all the dialogue and descriptions on the wiki. The 20 belonging to Herta all seem to put you in the pov of the memory holder. It tells it more like a story, kinda similar to Simulated Universe?

But the Aetherium Wars Bubbles only gives dialogue (very similar to Sampo’s character stories) making us more like an observer and not part of the memory. Unless we’re watching the memory of someone who was watching the conversation, but I feel like there’d be more description of the setting if that were the case.

I could go on about the content of the conversation, but I think we’ve all read through it multiple times. What really caught my attention was the beginning and end dialogue of the bubble.

(taken from the wiki. I haven’t done aetherium wars yet ;-;)

Four things stick out to me right away:

The game/The trailblazer’s thoughts notes this feels different

As I mentioned before, there is no description of the scenery showing up before you, but just two figures. My guess as to why is that this bubble wasn’t created by a stolen memory, but was made by the memory holder (or at least the memory holder was involved in the process). The memory holder being Sampo

2. There’s an implication that this bubble was left on purpose

This only adds to the point above. There’s a strong implication that Sampo left this for the Trailblazer to find. You also get an achievement for finding this bubble called Confessions of the Mask which. That kinda says it all.

But now I have two questions, the first being how? It's not said explicitly, but in a conversation with Herta it's implied that Memory Bubbles are only made by Memokeepers. So, if this was left by Sampo, either he got a memokeeper to help him (extremely possible) or he has the power to do it himself (extremely interesting)

My second question is why? 

Why would he tell us? Why is he telling us in this indirect way? My guess is it has something to do with his mask. The conversation in the bubble mentions Penacony and Sparkle. So,this was probably around the time Sampo started planning to go to Penacony to get his mask. I discussed this with a friend, and she suggested it might even be some sort of warning, which is why it’s done with a memory bubble. 

That sort of reminds me of the recent event, where Sampo spills a lot about the Fools and the Tavern, information that you would only really know as a Fool, but said it in a way that implied he wasn’t a fool. That he heard it from somewhere else, someone else, not that he knew it first hand. I wonder if his mask is sort of.. Making him unstable? (He grew increasingly dark every day) And the 7 day event was another warning. Warning of who he might become when the mask fully takes hold and a warning to not become like him

3. The game/the Trailblazer’s thought recognizes that there are multiple mysterious things about Sampo

Maybe this isn’t as important as I’m making it out to be. After all, we all know something is very Off about Sampo. But the Trailblazer recognizing it feels significant to me. It feels like further confirmation that eventually we will unravel these mysteries. Eventually.

4. “When talking to one who wears a mask, always keep your wits about you.”

This. THIS. This statement has been driving me mad since I first saw it. When I read those words I immediately thought of the translated statement from Topaz’s trailer:

“One who is unaccountably solicitous is hiding evil intentions”

(if you have no idea what I’m talking about, it’s one of my first posts)

The statements are not the same. But they feel so strongly similar, like they go hand in hand. Both are warnings. Both tell you to be careful about people who are not how they appear, people with masks and people who are falsely sincere. Both are talking about Sampo. Looking into this made me realize just how many times we've been warned about Sampo. Half of those times being Sampo himself

Something about it just makes my brain light up with possibilities and I feel like I keep pushing the statements together waiting for something to make sense and explain everything else, but I’ve yet to figure it out. So I’m left here just kind of going insane

But that’s all I have for now! Maybe someone else will have something

[rootspiral]

Agatha All Along deep dive: episode 1 part 3

(Wandavision entries: [1][2][3])

(AAA entries: ep1 [1][2][3][4])

so babe, hear me out. we could adopt him. just spitballing here (agatha, probably)

bwahhaha fantasy!billy and his death stare, meanwhile real billy is such a polite baby

if you look closely you can tell Joe Locke is fighting for his life holding down laughter in a lot of his scenes with Katrhyn. he has nerves of steel, couldn't be me

(also, billy telling her she has neither the respect of her peers NOR a fulfilling home life? harsh, but fair.) (at least her wife is trying to fix the home life part)

honey, don't go around kicking grumpy little twinks now! perfectly in character. despite her chaotic exterior, rio is a very lawful person. she is literally the laws of nature!

the Ballad plays faintly in the background when Billy mentions the Road

I love when good actors have to pretend to be bad actors. and I also find it interesting that Agatha cast herself as a good guy. does it make her feel better about herself? is she telling herself that all the atrocities were justified, that it was only survival instinct? (like rio said, she's only lying to herself)

I had to look up the painting, it's Macbeth meeting the three witches (thank you Reddit!) So Macbeth (Agatha) and Banquo (Billy) meeting Lilia, Jen and Alice?

how did I miss Billy sitting on the chair Rio was just on?! amazing lens choices here too

Wanda's death makes her cry again. I honestly, honestly believe she feels awful about what she did to her. but guilt will never be enough to redeem her - especially because she tends to run away from it.

Wanda's magic was so strong that it took at least four things to undo the spell: Wanda dying, Rio's intervention, Billy's counterspell, and Agatha's willpower. It was a group effort, Agatha could have never done it alone. And despite her scorched earth tactics, there are still two people in her life, rio and billy, willing to help out in her hour of need

it's naughty tiiiime

I still really love the curls

can I say iconique?

it's like someone's about to die at the end of this

bwahahahahaah and oh my GAWD all the case files and boxes, where did she GET that stuff, did she rob a precint, did she make them with the power of arts and crafts

you know what I think? being naked here is a power move. she is being very over the top because she's really uncomfortable, she just woke up and she's in those moments when you stop dreaming and have to relearn what's real and what isn't. she is someone used to calculate and scheme and micromanage every aspect of her life and she is not in control right now. what does Agatha do to reclaim control? she puts on a show. to her, being under the spell was way more like being naked, her insecurities and emotions and past were out in the open for everyone to see. being physically naked could never be nearly as distressing, and this is a nakedness she chose, because it tells people nothing about herself, nothing of what she wants to keep secret and protected. she's got the upper hand, not the other way round

you are all cowards and sheep for not saying Wanda's name, says the lady who would rather hide under a dozen magic layers than face her problems

that is so nice that they brought her groceries actually??? and lol those are the flowers in Agatha's crime scene pictures

that little girl is having a great time

FUCK CLOTHES BUT FUCK THESE CLOTHES SPECIFICALLY!!!!

(wait am I allowed to post butt cheeks? what are the rules right now?)

she turns quiet and emo as soon as she's alone

why doesn't she just - kiss the wiwwle bunny. bury her nose in that big fluffly head. even villains need a cuddle sometimes.

sure, bring señor scratchy. so menacing. that'll show them.

poor boy. trapped in a closet with ralph's bluray collection

aaand I really want to get to the next scene so I'll start on it right away, hopefully it'll be ready later tonight

go to part 4

[glisten-inthedark]

I’m rewatching some of Mike and Will’s smaller scenes in season 2 ‘cause when I first watched season 2 I think it was really easy for me to fall into the trap of thinking all of Mike’s behavioral issues stemmed from missing & grieving El

And I still truly believe that’s a massive part of it because I think he has a form of survivor and almost caretaker’s guilt from El’s supposed death. He took care of El and then she singled him out in a goodbye and seemingly died protecting him and his friends. That is a helluva weight to carry around and he’s experiencing PTSD as the anniversary effect kicks into gear.

But in s2e1, before Will has to go into Hawkins Lab, Will is clearly down in the dumps in class because of the Zombie Boy note he got in his locker. We don’t see Mike notice, but later he says “He’s quiet today,” which shows that he did in fact notice his mood. Which is a really nice subtle parallel to Rink o’ Mania where we don’t see Mike noticing Will’s mood but then Mike himself reveals that oh yes, he has been incredibly aware of Will’s mood, attitude, and behavior.

I also just love how the camera focuses in on Mike when the boys are watching Will leave. The creators are screaming at the audience, “HOW MIKE FEELS RIGHT NOW IS YOUR PRIORITY,” and yet it’s so easy (at least it was for me, on my first watch) in Mike’s very next scene to take his moodiness as missing El, because we find out from his parents that he’s had behavioral issues all year, so my silly little brain went, “Oh, because of losing El.” But when the scene starts, before Karen even brings up the two boxes of toys for the yard sale, Mike is sullen and picking at his food.

And again, this is Mike’s next scene after they very intentionally focused on Mike being concerned for Will going to the lab. So he’s not picking at his food because of El—it’s because he’s worried about Will. (Contrasting Dustin & Lucas going to the arcade to watch Max, most of their focus on her.)

Then this dinner scene is followed by Nancy & the Holland’s dinner scene, which ends in Nancy experiencing her own guilt over losing her best friend….and only then do we get an El-focused scene for Mike. Directly after a deep display of grief and guilt from Nancy over her platonic best friend. In Mike’s scene with the toys, he sets aside Rory the dinosaur, which he and the audience associates with El…..except…..she showed zero interest in this toy in season 1. He also picks up the Millennium Falcon, which Dustin tried to get her to fly, but Mike never witnessed her actually levitating it. He associates it with Dustin’s attempt to make her fly it, but not her actually engaging with it.

And all the while, hovering over his head and shoulder, are Will’s drawings. After he picks up the Millennium Falcon, he’s framed between two of Will’s drawings.

Of course Mike misses El; he cares for her and he’s seen firsthand her communicate through the radio, and we’ve seen that he was able to sense her presence like Will did when he was in the UD, and he tells Will that he feels like he keeps seeing her, so I think El visiting him really heightened that need to keep reaching out, and also the guilt that would come with stopping reaching out. After all, in the scene in s2e1 when he uses his radio to reach out to her, it is absolutely Eleven whose voice we first hear, not Dustin. It sounds exactly like her. And then before Mike starts talking, we hear Dustin say “Mike?” and it sounds completely different. So imagine him experiencing that on and off for a whole year! The poor boy would struggle to move on so incredibly badly.

But before the basement scene, it was Will on his brain. Not El. Will was the reason he was sullen at dinner.

Idk I just think it’s so interesting how even though I’d rewatched season 2 a ton of times before season 4 and now, I had M*leven on the brain and so let that color how I perceived things and the assumptions I made.

Hello! Oh this is why I love getting asks, I didn't even notice all of this.

To be honest I also assumed his behavior change was due to El at first, but thought better of it not due to the things you noticed but because after I watched I thought about it and realized it was most likely a situation where there's a lot of trauma from what happened to El and what happened to Will intertwined.

I've talked about this before very on a surface level because no one here needs a psychology Ted Talk, but I truly believe El and Will are very enmeshed in Mike's brain due to trauma coping mechanisms.

Will disappears, he gets El. El gets Will back but disappears and he thinks she dies and she gets her back, connect this with Mike's internalized homophobia/biphobia and we have a recipe for his behavior down the line.

[evercelle]

Wait! What does it mean that if KDJ reply to YJH, he becomes a character?? Wait how? (I read it long ago and I don't remember it😭)

the text is from chp 370, when kdj and yjh fight after the existence of TWSA has been revealed and yjh "kills" hsy.

yjh forgoes speaking out loud and has been thinking at kdj, knowing that kdj can hear his thoughts. this is just my interpretation, but i think kdj refuses to answer at first because replying to the unspoken questions would be proof positive for yjh of the act itself: that yjh is a character kdj is reading even now.

it's an interesting bit of mental gymnastics, because the quoted text comes right after kdj's narration in which he (1) begins doubting [kdj's] own core identity and (2) states that yjh has become someone who won't be controlled by anyone, including kdj himself. yjh has become more "real," but there's a part of kdj that doesn't seem to always like that--seen in past chapters when yjh acts differently than his novel counterpart had/would, and kdj thinks stuff like "this is wrong, it isn't the yjh i know." novel!yjh is an existence that's portrayed as larger-than-life to kdj, so important to him that he was kdj's literal reason to keep living, so he can't just be a "mere character" to kdj... but at the same time, kdj struggles to give up the certainty of a known quantity. kdj comes off as a bit (or a lot lol) of a control freak who's really uncomfortable when the story diverges from his knowledge, so i think his reluctance to leave behind the story he cherishes and reconcile these identities is mirrored by the fourth wall thickening continuously during this fight... ultimately, though, he states that things will never be the same again, and kdj/yjh introduce themselves in their own words. feels like a big turning point in both of them navigating who "yoo joonghyuk" and "kim dokja" are as "characters in a story" versus "a person here in this moment"

you can take my yapping with a lot of grains of salt though, since i've been on pause with continuing the novel haha! this is just my read of the divorce fight. but i really like the themes of control and impersonation (played both for laughs and for real) throughout the novel culminating here and falling away to the stripped-down rawness of finally seeing each other and properly doing a self-introduction... good stuff

[deadhands69]

A New End: The Bet

MDNI

this one is sfw but the series contains eventual smut

Tomura Shigaraki x gn/(eventually afab?) reader

Warnings/Content/etc: swearing, mentions of violence, destruction destruction destruction, eventual spoilers, and eventual smut.

intro - (this is part one) - part 2 soon

A quiet chatter meets your ears as you enter the open living area. A few more people have joined in the few weeks after you’d moved into the league of villains headquarters which really livened up the place. For a room of villains, they’re a lot more entertaining to be around than you would have expected. You were worried it would be similar to your time at UA, but people were actually nice to you here.

Most of them.

The leader, Shigaraki, still hasn’t warmed up to you. Tensing every time you enter the room. Never quite looking you in the eyes. Your ideas were always held under higher scrutiny than the others. You’re not sure if he has higher expectations of you because of the information he expects your quirk to provide or if he just hates you, but with how he treats everyone else you've started leaning towards the latter. Fortunately, he rarely leaves his room - still recovering from some injuries earlier in the year. 

In any case, your quirk hadn’t warned you away from him which allowed you to hold out some hope that maybe he just needs time to get to know you.

Considering that half the league are practically homeless, it had become a daily occurrence to wake up to a full house. No one seemed to mind, especially Kurogiri who is currently brewing another pot of coffee for the group. You still weren’t close friends with anyone but the company is nice.

“I’ll bet it’s a boyfriend,” you overhear Toga exclaim, “I wonder if he’s cute!”

“Or she. Could be a girlfriend,” Twice adds. 

“What’s your bet?” Compress asks someone just behind the wall out of your sight, “where do you think [y/n] goes every night?”

From your vantage point in the door frame, they don’t realize you’re there yet. You pause at the sound of your name to listen a bit longer.

“Don’t know and don’t care,” Dabi retorts, “not my fucking business.”

“What if he’s the boyfriend?” Toga grumbles under her breath.

“Fuck off, I have better shit to do every night than date anyone.” And Dabi has a trail of bodies as alibis, you note to yourself if anyone tries to suggest that again.

“Alright,” Compress announces theatrically, “and now that everyone’s placed their bets-”

creakkkkk

The floorboards announce your presence as you shift your weight. 

Fuck. Eavesdropping time is over.

“Morning,” you say as casually as possible to the group of villains, most of them looking anywhere but you.

“Good morning,” Toga responds cheerfully. Without missing a beat she adds, “do you have a boyfriend?” “What? No…” you mumble while pouring yourself a cup of coffee and taking a seat at the empty spot between Spinner and Shigaraki.

“How about a secret love?” she presses again, this time nearly leaning over the table for an answer.

You laugh at the thought of announcing any secret over a crowded table before shaking your head and becoming very interested in the coffee mug in front of you. “Dirt-Cheap Donki-Oote” it reads.

Shigaraki scoffs to your right. Clearly he's bored of this conversation. He'd never come to your defense so you know he’s not changing the subject for your sake, but you’re still glad when he brings up the next mission instead.

That night, you sneak out a bit more quietly than usual. You had to wait longer for nightfall, considering that it's midsummer, but it should be worth it. Following the dark streets in the industrial area you’ve been living in, there are still a few new places you’d like to check out.

It was a silly hobby, really. You took it up years ago during your time at UA when you really needed it - you just never stopped. 

Upon arriving at your destination, you pause. No premonitions, safe.

Carefully, you cross the footprint into the demolished structure. Steel beams wrap up around you, twisted from failing to keep the concrete upright.

Up to now, your life was always planned out for you. Even more so with your future-based quirk. Getting glimpses of what’s to come always leaves you waiting for life to happen. Or worse, on stand-by until you know if you’ve successfully changed your fate or not. After a while, it felt like your whole life was being lived out ahead of you without a break. 

These buildings aren’t like that at all though. There’s something calming in the rubble that draws you into the present and keeps you here. It feels final. Finished. Everything that was waiting to happen here did, now it’s a modern ruin. A reminder of things that have already come to pass. There’s tranquility in that destruction. Some people touch grass, you prefer crumbling concrete. 

Finding a nice spot in the wreckage, you settle in for a while. 

The following night, you debate going out again. It was a long day of mission planning and you’re exhausted. You won’t be able to join said mission as your quirk was deemed to be more useful from afar, but regardless, you’re expected to sit in on all the meetings in case any visions present themselves (they didn't.) Sinking into your bed, it’s warm and comfortable. You could easily stay but the lure of tranquility calls to you. 

Out the door you go.

Fifteen minutes later, you’re nearly there. Footsteps echoing through the empty street, you glance around the abandoned buildings for your specific destination. A bush rustles behind you, causing your head to snap back.

Nothing. 

Probably just the wind.

Suddenly, a vision strikes you. Alarmed. Yet you don’t feel any danger. If you keep walking, Tomura Shigaraki will follow you down the street and enter the building behind you. Knocking a rock off a concrete block, startling you just enough that your quirk is giving you the heads up. Not the most exciting prophecy, but you know he’s there now. 

“You can come out, Shigaraki!” you call out in the general direction of his hiding place, “I know you’re there.

Slowly, he rises. A few leaves tangled in his hair.

“How?”

“Quirk,” you respond. Surely, he is who the group sent to follow you and confirm the guesses from their bet yesterday morning. 

“Come on.”

Hesitantly, he follows. 

You wonder how he managed to keep up earlier, considering that both of his legs are still recovering from being shot. He's not limping but certainly doesn't look like he's having an easy time walking. You slow down a bit. 

Approaching the address, you're starting to feel nervous. This is all to calm down, but the prospect of an audience is daunting. On second thought, he's wearing a literal hand on his face so he's not really in a place to judge. And even if he does think less of you, he couldn't hate you much more than he already does. Right? 

Surprisingly, his presence doesn't affect your experience much. He gives you space, sticking to the other side of the caved-in shell of a warehouse. 

“Why?” Shigaraki’s crimson eyes follow you through the space. Watching your fingers as they trace over fractured pillars and contorted metal.

That question. You’ve dreaded anyone else finding out what you do every night for that alone and here he is asking like it's not a big deal. What are you supposed to say, ‘I like being around demolished shit’? On second thought, yeah. That could work.

“It makes me calm, being here.”

“You like…decay?” he asks incredulously.

“Yeah, I guess so,” considering your audience, you decide it wouldn't hurt to elaborate.

”There’s nothing to wait for - it’s already been destroyed. This is it.” 

His face doesn't give anything away, peering between fingers before staring back at his feet while he shuffles through the open area. 

“No wonder you’re here,” he mumbles under his breath.

“Did you win the bet?” you ask on the walk back home. 

“Bet?” he considers for a moment, “Oh. No. No one won.”

“What was your guess?”

“Being alone,” he winces slightly after stepping over a curb too quickly for his injured leg to keep up, “but they said that wasn't specific enough so I changed it to ghost hunting.”

You laugh, “ghost hunting??”

“It's not the worst guess. Magne thought you were an exotic dancer.”

“She has a lot more faith in me than I do,” you snicker mostly to yourself, “could you imagine?”

He says nothing. 

Suddenly, you remember you're talking to your fairly stern boss and not a friend your age. It's easy to forget when you're also roommates, the lines blur easily. 

Change of topic. 

Unfortunately, decay is all that comes to mind so you go with it. 

“Tell me about your quirk, how does it work?”

“You actually want to know?” he replies in the same incredulous voice as earlier. 

“Yeah. You decay things but obviously not everything. You were holding your phone earlier.”

“My pinky was off.”

“Huh?”

“I have to touch things with five fingers.”

“Got it. Did it take a lot of practice to learn your quirk?”

He laughs eerily, “No, definitely not. I never really practiced, I just kind of used it.”

Ah. Got it. Not asking on that one, you catch the implication. 

This conversation has to be so boring to him but at least you diffused some tension.

“I could show you, sometime,” he says quietly, still not looking directly at you. “If you want.”

“Tomorrow night?”

“That works.”

“Sounds fun.”

“You would say that.”

Maybe you're imagining it, but you almost think he's smiling under that hand. 

After last night, you thought you made some headway with Tomura Shigaraki but your working relationship remains the same as ever. All day, he laid into you for your ideas. Glowering over the table every time you so much as looked at him. When it came time to leave for the evening, you were absolutely convinced he’d back out - remembering how much he can’t stand you. But that wasn’t the case. Here he is, closely following you for the second night in a row. 

“Where do you want to go?” he asks. 

“I have three places saved to check out on this street,” you bring up the saved places map on your phone, “does that work for you?”

“Why not one of these?” he gestures towards the rows of abandoned buildings surrounding you, “doesn't have to be destroyed already, that's the point right?”

Oh. Yeah. That could work. 

You nod. 

“Pick one.” 

“Wait, really?”

“It's all the same to me anyways,” he watches as you consider your options. 

“Uhm, that one,” you point, “the one with a lot of windows.”

“Okay, stay back here.” He's already halfway across the street. 

Reaching a hand out, he touches the building as nonchalantly as he approached it. Cracks fracture from his fingertips, spreading over the entire structure. Within half a minute, the whole thing collapses loudly. A cloud of dust hangs in the air above him. He looks unphased. And it's… Hot? 

No, you think to yourself, it's just surprising. That's all. You'd just never seen him use his quirk before. 

Still, you have to admit - he's powerful. 

Quickly, you cross the street to join him. 

The freshly dusted concrete reminds you of the smell before rain, just sharper. Shards of glass glisten across the space, 

You spend a few minutes taking it all in. 

He simply watches you. 

“We've gotta go,” his quiet but direct voice urges as he shoves the hand from his face into the front pocket of his sweatshirt. 

“Hey!” you hear in the distance, as the two of you break into a sprint. 

You don't think it's a hero, probably some low level security guard but it's still best to not get caught. Especially with a wanted villain. Of course, Shigaraki could easily take him out but he's probably already called for backup so it doesn't really fix the issue. 

Running down the street, you're about to round the corner before your quirk screams at you to take another way. Yanking the shoulder of his hoodie, you pull him to the first door you run past. It's not budging but he dusts the lock quickly, pulling you inside. You thread a piece of rebar through the inner door handles just in case. 

Footsteps grow closer and you realize just how many windows your chosen hiding place has. Your quirk didn't warn you against it though? 

A pull on your arm brings you to a dark corner. Shoulder to shoulder, you're huddled out of sight. The street lights illuminating just enough to cast a streak of light over his face. 

It occurs to you now, you've never really seen his face. Especially not this close. 

He's younger than you thought. Considering that he's the leader and Girian introduced you, you assumed they were around the same age. Turns out, Shigaraki is a lot closer to your age. 

When he's not glaring at you, his eyes are really pretty. Dark red and striking against the pale of his skin. The thin skin around his face is dry and littered with scars. You hope it doesn't hurt. 

A minute passes as you admire his beauty, completely forgetting not to stare. 

Based on his expression, you'd think he was bored but the nervous itching and chewing the skin on his bottom lip gives away some anxiety. It's nice seeing he's actually human. 

With this new realization, you're acutely aware of the closeness. The way his shoulder brushes against yours. You can practically feel the warmth of his body through the fabric of both of your clothes. 

“What?” he asks, bringing you out of your trance. 

“Nothing,” you respond, feeling your cheeks burn. 

“We should probably go,” he jumps to his feet, “sounds like he went that way so let's find a door on the other side of the building.“

You follow him through the maze of hallways before coming to a way out. An old fire exit sign hangs from the ceiling above, long since burned out. 

Locked again. 

He shrugs and effortlessly crumbles the entire door for you to pass through. 

You had it right earlier: he's definitely hot.

m.list

[this was originally two parts but they were both short so it made more sense to make it one]

[lovetaroandtaemin]

Think About Us

Bang Chan x Reader

Word Count: 4,609 Genre: Angst, Smut, Fluff Rating: Explicit, MINORS DNI!

Summary: Y/N struggles with the fact that she almost cheated on Chan before he left for Australia. When he comes back, their relationship goes through a series of ups and downs, forcing them to confront whether they're actually compatible.

Content Warnings: Arguments, toxic relationship, Chan lowkey uses Y/N for sex near the end, mentions of cheating, angst with a bittersweet ending, smut (unprotected sex, creampie, slight daddy kink, breeding kink if you really squint), some alcohol consumption. If you think I missed a warning, please let me know! A/N: This is part 3 to "Start of Something New?" and "Doing This Again!" If you haven't read parts 1 and 2, I definitely recommend doing that first. There will not be a part four.

Fic is under the cut.

The morning after your outing with Felix, you decided to call Chan. Sure, it was partially because you missed him, but it was also because you wanted to ease your guilty conscience by reiterating to your boyfriend how much you loved him. The second he picked up; he started apologizing profusely for losing track of time when the two of you were supposed to be on a date. When you got an opportunity to talk, you apologized too. Initially, he assumed that it was because you didn’t respond to his texts and calls and said, “Honey, I promise you that it’s ok. You were understandably mad at me.”

You decided not to correct his assumption by telling him what you almost did, instead saying, “But that’s not why I didn’t answer. I didn’t answer because I went out with Felix, and I didn’t hear my phone ring.”

“Oh, ok. Where did you go?”

“We went to a club.”

Immediately, Chan was both confused and suspicious. You had never shown an interest in clubs before, so why were you there last night? And without even telling him? He had a feeling that there was something more to what you said, but he decided not to push. Instead, he told you that he loved you before getting ready to board his long flight home.

You spent the entire time that Chan was in Australia thinking about your relationship with him. It had hurt you that he blew you off for the studio so soon after you started to see each other again. However, it was immature and petty to flirt with another guy while he was busy, and you knew that. That doesn’t mean you didn’t still go out with Felix regularly to forget about how much you missed Chan. After what happened the first time, however, you made a conscious effort to behave yourself instead of doing something you would later regret.

Chan’s time in Australia was filled with both joy and sadness. Seeing his family was a blessing, of course, and he was grateful that he had a bit of time to spend with them instead of the usual routine of being stuck on another continent working. At the same time, however, he missed you and the boys a lot. His family’s constant interest in talking about you when he told them the news didn’t exactly help matters.

Hannah was especially pleased to hear that the two of you were back together, threatening to hurt Chan if he didn’t treat you better this time. On top of his sister’s threats, his parents asked him at least once a day when you they would get to see you again. Each time they asked, he promised to talk to you about coming with him for his next visit. He could only hope for his own sake that you’d say yes.

When Chan finally came home, one of the first things he did was ask you to spend the night at the dorm with him. You happily agreed and made your way there after you got done work. Upon arriving at the dorms, however, instead of being greeted by your boyfriend, you were greeted by a concerned Felix. Before you could say a word, he pulled you into a hug and asked, “How are you doing? Is everything ok?”

“I’m alright, Lix. I’m excited to finally see Chan.”

“Are you sure that you’re alright? You’ve been acting different lately.”

“I’m ok, I promise. Thank you for checking on me, though.”

“Any time,” he said, letting you go.

You made your way through the dorm, greeting the rest of the group as you did. Changbin and Jisung smiled when they saw you, relieved that you and Chan hadn’t split up. When you saw Minho, he told you that everyone else would be leaving soon before giving you a knowing smile. You made a mental note of that as you knocked on Chan’s door.

The moment his door was open, Chan pulled you into his room and kissed you. You let out a small sigh at the feeling, ecstatic to have his lips on yours again. When he pulled away from the kiss, he held you so tightly you could barely breathe, a tranquil silence filling the room as the two of you just took in each other’s presence. You stayed that way for what felt like hours before he finally spoke, choosing to break the silence by saying, “I missed you.”

“I missed you too, Channie.”

“I love you.”

“I love you more.”

“I love you most,” he said before kissing you again. The kiss he greeted you with was soft and gentle, but this one was different. It was more desperate. That’s when you remembered that the two of you hadn’t had sex since before he left, and you couldn’t help but hope that the two of you could change that now that he was home.

Chan had been desperate to feel you the entire time he was gone, but his desperation only intensified when he came back to Korea. Now that you were back in his arms, he could hardly contain himself. As his lips moved against yours, his hands slowly made their way down to your ass. When you felt him squeeze, you let out a soft moan. God, he loved your moans. Hearing you again made it even harder to control himself. As badly as he wanted to be inside you, however he also wanted to take his time with you today. His goal was to make you want him as much as he wanted you.

Little did he know, you already did. You had been thinking about how good he would feel inside of you for weeks, and now that there was a chance to actually feel him, you could barely contain your excitement and arousal. When the feeling of need between your legs was too much to bear, you pulled away from the kiss and said, “Please fuck me, daddy.”

Before you knew it, both of you were naked, and your clothes were in a pile on the floor. Seeing all of you made the last little bit of self-control that he had fly out the window as he dragged you over to his bed. Next thing you knew, he was on top of you, carefully aligning his tip with your entrance. He slowly pushed his hips forward with a groan, and you let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding as his cock made its way into you.

Chan waited to move until he was certain you were ready and comfortable. Even when you gave him the green light to start thrusting, he started slowly. He had missed you a lot, and he wanted to savor the moment because for just a little while, nothing mattered except for you underneath him. It was one of his favorite feelings in the world, and one of the many reasons that he loved intimacy with you.

You felt like you were on cloud nine as you felt Chan start to increase the speed of his movements. He knew exactly how you liked to be touched, teased, and fucked; and every time the two of you had sex, he used his knowledge to his advantage. It honestly amazed you how well he still knew your body, especially when you spent such a long time away from each other.

“Fuck, baby girl. You feel so good,” Chan said with a groan.

“Feels so good, daddy. Love how it feels you fuck me.”

Chan let out a loud moan at your words and started fucking into you harder. You held onto him so tightly he was certain that there would be marks when the two of you were done. He wasn’t complaining, of course. He loved it when the two of you got rough. You loved it just as much as he did, if not more.

It didn’t take much longer for Chan to ask, “I’m close, baby. Where do you want it?”

“Inside, please, please, please. Want you to fill me up, daddy.”

That was all Chan needed to hear to still inside of you, his release hitting him like a truck. Feeling him cum inside of you was all you needed to reach your own orgasm, and you came undone around him with a loud moan of his name. As you rode out your highs together, he held you close and told you what a good girl you’d been for him. After you both caught your breath, Chan carefully climbed off of you to help you clean yourself up and get dressed.

Once you were cleaned up and fully clothed, Chan grabbed your hand and pulled you back to his bed to lie down. Then he got up just long enough to get you each a glass of water. He carefully brought the two glasses back to his room, making sure you drank the entire glass before he even considered touching his. Once you did, he finished his own drink and set the glasses aside before and getting back into bed with you. Immediately after he found a comfortable position, he held you like you were going to disappear any second.

“I love you so much, you know that right?” Chan asked before kissing your head.

“I know, I love you too,” you whispered before drifting off to sleep, your boyfriend not far behind you.

When you woke up the next morning, Chan was nowhere to be found. You briefly wondered where he was, but before you could worry too much, he came back into the room with two plates filled with food. He smiled when he saw that you were awake and said, “Good morning, sleepyhead.”

“Good morning, Channie. What’s that?”

“Breakfast. Minho cooked for everyone this morning.”

“Tell him I said thank you, please.”

“I will. Here you go,” he said, handing you one of the plates. The two of you ate in silence, choosing to just enjoy the food as well as each other’s company as you mentally prepared yourselves for the day ahead. Once you were done eating, Chan decided to ask you about what you did while he was away. You told him about all of the times that you went to the club with Felix.

“I thought you didn’t like going to clubs,” Chan said, his suspicions growing.

“So did I, but Felix suggested it and I enjoyed it more than I thought that I would.”

Chan had to admit that he was a bit jealous of your closeness with Felix. He tried not to be the possessive boyfriend that didn’t let his partner have male friends, but he couldn’t help but wonder sometimes if your bond was strictly platonic. If he had taken the time to just ask you or Felix about it, he would have immediately been reassured, and a conversation about boundaries and trust would have happened. However, Chan’s pride prevented him from telling you about how he was feeling, so he said nothing about it. Choosing to ignore his suspicions, he just said, “Hey, by the way, I do need to go to the studio in a little bit.”

“Ok, I need to leave soon for work anyway. I love you.”

“I love you too, princess.”

The two of you got ready together to go about the rest of your day. When it was time for you to go, Chan gave you a kiss on your forehead before leaving for a studio session with Changbin and Jisung. You left shortly after to go to work. Your day was long and boring, and you texted Chan about it to complain several times. He didn’t respond to your texts, but you assumed that he was busy. When you tried to call after work, however, he still didn’t answer. You hoped that he wasn’t still at the studio, but you wouldn’t have been surprised if he was. So, you sent one more text telling him that you loved him and went about your evening at your apartment.

Three days passed without hearing from Chan. Even when you dated the first time, you never went more than 24 hours without at least a text telling you that he was ok. At this point you were worried sick, so you decided to call one of the guys to make sure that nothing bad had happened. In the end you chose to call Minho because you knew that if something had gone wrong, he would be the one most likely to be handling everything in Chan’s place.

When your name flashed on Minho’s phone as it rang, he was surprised to say the least. The two of you had never been close, so he wondered why you were calling him as opposed to Chan or Felix. Still, he picked up his phone and said, “Hello?”

“Hey, Min. Is Chan ok?”

“Yeah, he’s sitting right next to me, actually. Why?”

“I haven’t heard from him in three days.”

“I’m sorry, what?” Minho asked, the sudden anger obvious in his voice.

“I’m not trying to start a problem, I just wanted to make sure that he’s safe. We’ve never gone more than a day without talking before.”

“He is safe, and you’re not starting a problem. I’ll handle it, I promise.”

“Please don’t–”

Minho hung up before you could finish speaking and turned to Chan. Even before Minho spoke, Chan was nervous. He had heard part of the phone call, and he knew that he was going to be in trouble from the tone in his friend’s voice.

“Hey, Chan, why did (Y/N) just call me and tell me that she hasn’t heard from you in three days?”

“It has not been 3 days,” Chan mumbled as he pulled his phone out of his pocket. “Oh my god, it’s been 3 days.”

“Make it right, Chan.” The tone in Minho’s voice as he spoke made it clear that although Chan was the leader of the group, he needed to listen to his friend.

Chan quickly called you and apologized, telling you that he had lost track of time and forgotten to reply to your texts. You didn’t really believe him, but you chose not to press the issue. After all, he was safe, and that was what mattered. He also promised to make it up to you and asked you to accompany him to your favorite restaurant for dinner that night, which significantly brightened your spirits. After you accepted his apology and his invitation, you hung up and got ready to go.

The date went better than you expected it to, if you were being honest with yourself. The entire time you were at the restaurant, Chan’s sole focus was you. It was selfish, and you knew it, but that was all that you wanted. You wanted your boyfriend to treat you like a priority instead of an option. The success of your date gave you hope that your relationship would improve.

Chan regretted not taking you on a date like this sooner after the two of you got back together. Seeing you excited was one of his favorite things, and he loved giving you excuses to get dressed up because he loved to show you off. And he would certainly be showing you off at the restaurant. You’d done your makeup in a style that was simple, but still flattered your features. Your hair was styled in an elegant updo. Sure, that was done so you could avoid looking like a mess if you left your hair down, but he didn’t need to know that. Chan’s favorite part of your look was your dress. It was a navy-blue cocktail dress that accentuated your curves perfectly. Frankly, he was in awe when you got into his car.

The date at the restaurant mostly went the way you expected, with one exception. At the end of your meal, Chan apologized to you for not texting or calling you after you left the dorm a few days before, and in general for how he’d treated you since the two of you got back together. He explained that he’d been busier than usual with Stray Kids’ upcoming comeback, and he truly did not realize how much time had passed. You wanted to be angry with him, you really did, but you really couldn’t stay mad when you saw the look of pure guilt on his face.

When Chan dropped you off at your apartment after your date, he promised you that he would treat you better. He swore to put in more effort when it came to your relationship, and he swore to prioritize you more often. You would have been lying if you’d said that you weren’t hopeful that your relationship could actually be better this time. Hearing Chan promise to be different was the exact reassurance that you needed that he still loved you.

The hope that you had when you left the restaurant barely lasted a week. To be fair, Chan did start putting in more effort when it came to your relationship. However, did that effort last? No, it did not. It took a concerningly short amount of time for him to fall back into his new habit of not responding to you for days at a time. Each time, you tried to have a conversation with him about how much it worried you when you didn’t hear from him, but he would just say that he was trying. At the end of each conversation, you found that you had less and less faith in his apparently empty promises.

The exception to that, of course, was that Chan texted you every single time he was in the mood to fuck. Whenever he was stressed about the new album or a fight with one of the other members, you were the first person he called to blow off some steam. At first, you didn’t necessarily mind it. You liked being able to help your boyfriend take his mind off of the things that bothered him, and he was good in bed after all. As the pattern continued, however, you found yourself feeling used and worthless.

You realized that something had to give on a random night when he called you to ask if he could come over. He’d been stressed about work deadlines, and he of course wanted to fuck the stress away. You told him that he could come to your apartment, and the two of you did what you always did.

The sex was mediocre this time, probably because of the increasing disconnect between the two of you, but the aftercare was incredible. You had no idea why, but he was more attentive than he’d ever been whenever he gently coaxed you out of subspace and helped you feel more like yourself. That was always the case. It was strange, really. Even if the sex wasn’t good, you could count on the aftercare being great. If you were being honest with yourself, it was probably the main reason you let the games continue as long as they did.

The feeling that Chan still loved you started to fade when he quietly asked, “Will you be ok if I go back to the dorms for tonight instead of sleeping here? Jisung just texted me and asked me to help him with a song.”

You badly wanted to say no and beg him to stay just for the night, but you knew better than to get in the way of his work at this point. Instead of begging for attention from your boyfriend, you just replied, “Yeah, I’ll be fine. Go ahead.”

“Ok, I love you. I’ll text you when I get home.”

You waited for the rest of the night, but he never texted you. Instead, he went right to the studio with Jisung and went back to writing what was going to be Stray Kids’ new album. You knew that it would happen. In your mind this was just another example of what really seemed like his lack of care for you. He was incredibly loving when he wanted to be, like after sex or when he was apologizing to you when something he did hurt you. The problem was, he frequently acted like you either didn’t exist or like you were just a toy to him. You desperately wanted to hold on to the relationship because of how much you loved the good parts, but in the end, you decided that enough was enough.

The opportunity to have the conversation that you knew needed to happen presented itself about a week later when Felix invited you to yet another movie night at the dorm. This time Jisung wanted to watch “Spirited Away.” To tell the truth, you were conflicted. On the one hand, you loved spending time with the guys and didn’t want to ruin the night by arguing with Chan. On the other hand, you didn’t know when you would see Chan again in person to have the conversation that you knew you needed to have. In the end, you decided that this conversation was too important to not happen, though you were upset that you wouldn’t be able to enjoy the movie night with your friends.

When you got to the dorm, it was Chan that greeted you outside instead of Felix. He hugged you and tried to kiss your cheek, but you moved out of the way and told him that the two of you needed to talk. Your frustrated tone caught him by surprise, but he agreed. Once he let you into the dorm, quickly greeted the rest of the group and followed Chan to his room.

“What do you wanna talk about?” he asked, nervous about what was about to happen.

“Since you’ve gotten home, you’ve only talked to me for sex or when Minho yells at you. Why?”

To say that Chan was surprised by your question was an understatement. He knew that he had been distant, anyone would be with how he had been feeling, but he hadn’t realized the extent of it. It was wrong to ignore you, and he knew it, but he also didn’t think that he wanted to continue the relationship anymore. Still, he tried to give a flimsy excuse by saying, “I didn’t do it on purpose. I’ve just been so busy since the album, and- “

“Are you serious? Stop blaming it on work, Chan. I know there’s more to it than that. You’ve been busy with work before, but you’ve never gone days at a time without so much as a text to let me know you were safe. You’ve been busy with work before, but you’ve never treated me like I was nothing to you but a sex doll.”

“Do not accuse me of treating you that way.”

“Is it an accusation if it’s true? We only talk when you wanna fuck because you’re stressed.”

With a deep sigh, Chan said, “Fine, do you want me to tell you why I’ve been distant?”

“Yes! That’s why we’re having this conversation!”

“Felix told me that something happened at the club the night before I left.”

“What the fuck did he tell you?”

“He said that he saw you dancing a guy, and that you were crying when you left.”

“I met this guy, and we talked and danced. Nothing beyond that.”

“Then why were you crying?” You were quiet for a moment, and he added, “That’s what I thought. It was guilt, wasn’t it? You never cry unless you feel guilty. Even if nothing else happened, you probably wanted it to, right? To get back at me for forgetting about our date?”

The argument only continued to escalate as the two of you tore apart each other’s flaws and threw your own insecurities in each other’s faces. You still wanted to try to work everything out until he accused you of sleeping with Felix. That was when you said, “I am not fucking Felix. He’s my friend, and he always has been. It is not his fucking fault that you’re so worried about what I do when you’re not around you can’t bring yourself to give a fuck about me when you are.”

“Get out,” Chan spat in response.

“Gladly.”

You stormed out of Chan’s room, gave hasty goodbyes to the rest of the guys, and drove back to your apartment. When you got there, you blocked Chan on as many apps as you could and sent Felix a quick text explaining that you and Chan were done. Then, you shut your phone off and sobbed, hating yourself for getting back into a relationship with someone that you knew from the start would only hurt you in the end.

A few months after you left the Stray Kids dorm for the last time, you found yourself at a familiar nightclub. Even when you and Chan were together, it was one of your favorite places to go when you needed to distract yourself from difficult emotions. Tonight, you were missing your ex, which meant you badly needed a distraction.

The distraction that you needed ended up coming in the form of Hongjoong, the guy that you’d met during your first visit to this particular establishment. He flashed you a smile when he saw you and asked how you had been, excited to be dancing with you again. You kept your answers brief, choosing to flirt shamelessly instead of getting overly personal. He was amused by your boldness, but he still matched your energy. The two of you danced while you talked, and it made you feel better for a little while.  Maybe your relationship with Chan had ended, but that didn’t mean that you had to be sad forever.

Chan hated going to clubs. He always had. They were far louder than he liked, and he hated crowded spaces. When Changbin and Jisung asked him to go out to celebrate the group’s latest comeback, he wanted to say no. However, he knew that they were only asking because they thought he needed to get out more, so he reluctantly agreed. He would soon regret his decision, wishing he’d stayed home instead.

Almost immediately after walking into the club, he spotted you. You were laughing and dancing with a guy that wasn’t him, and it hurt to see another man be the reason you were smiling. It had been months, but he still loved you and wanted you to be his. However, when he considered all that had happened between you, he knew it wasn’t meant to be. While he still loved you, the two of you were far too toxic together. So, he went right to the bar and ordered a drink in an attempt to ignore the fact that you were across the room. As he sat at the bar, he found himself unable to stop thinking about you. At least, he couldn’t stop thinking about you until Ryujin sat on the stool next to him.

Whether it was the desire to get over you, the desire to get back at you, or some combination of the two, Chan would never know. However, when he saw your former best friend sitting next to him, he decided to strike up a conversation. She looked gorgeous, after all, and he had been desperate for a distraction from you. As they sat at the bar and caught up, he started to feel just a little bit better. Maybe he couldn’t have you, but that didn’t mean that he couldn’t have anyone.

Thank you so much to everyone that has shown continued support for this accidental mini-series! It was so much fun for me to write. I can only hope that y'all enjoy reading it as much as I've enjoyed writing it. If you like what you read, please consider liking, reblogging, and checking out my masterlist! If nothing there catches your attention, or you want to see something specific, feel free to send a request via my asks or dms!

Once again, thank you for reading!

[sweetshuga]

Heather ✰ MS [Bonus]

───~𓆩♡𓆪~───

bsf!matt! His inner turmoil and bad decision. Matt's 3rd person pov of part 2.

wc. 771

note. English is not my first language! Not proofread!

Your heart ached painfully as more tears fell down your face, but what could he possibly do when you’ve locked yourself in the bathroom and refused to open it—

Your thoughts were interrupted by the sound of a key twisting in the bathroom door lock.

Groaning quietly to himself as he retrieved the key to the bathroom door. The key sliding in and making a soft clicking sound as the lock opened. His heart dropped when he took notice of the state you were in.

"Hey... are you alright?" Matt crouched down, kneeling in front of you. Seeing you hug your knees tighter while looking away from him tugged at his heart, and the blatant lie didn’t help one bit. He had a clue as to why you cried, but didn’t want to be too hopeful.

Matt let out a sigh of relief, thinking that whatever was wrong wasn’t anything serious, but the relief disappeared as fast it appeared when he saw the small droplets of tears splattering on your bare knees.

"Look at me, pretty," he whispered, gently tilting your chin. His gaze raked over you face, seeing the fresh streaks of tears made his heart ache, but a small side of him couldn’t help but think how cute you looked.

He gently pulled you into a gentle embrace, silently conveying his feelings, hugging you tighter when he heard those soft broken whimpers and sobs. His own eyes threatened to tear up at the sound of you breaking down.

𓆩♡𓆪

He could feel you slowly calming down, your breathing slowing down and the soft sniffles replacing the quiet sobs. His heart ached more when he pulled away slightly to look at your face, his hand almost subconsciously came up to wipe your tears. "Feel better?" He watched as you nodded and wiped your face with the cuffs of your hoodie.

Matt watched as you stood up, seeming very fidgety and looked almost embarrassed, biting back a soft chuckle as he stood up beside you.

He couldn’t control his hand from reaching towards your arm but reminded himself that it would be better if he kept his feelings to himself. His hand dropped back to his side, conflict of emotions swirled through his head.

"Say..." Matt found himself talking, trying to ignore the way he could hear his own pulse in his ears. "Why did you cry?" He couldn’t believe he was asking you this, unable to wait to hear you reply, he immediately talked again.

"Was it because I was talking about, you know... her? " He saw the way you froze, taking it as a sign that what he said might be a clue, "I might be way off with this, but it’s been bothering me for a while," he admitted, looking at your face for any other signs.

He felt a rush of nervousness as he spoke his next words, "do you perhaps... like me?" He cursed himself internally, maybe he was being too straightforward.

"You don’t, right? I mean, we’re friends and you know I see you as basically my younger sister, right?" Matt winced internally when he grasped the weight and meaning of his own words, but it was too late to take it back.

Seeing your mood dampen slightly, but your attempts to keep the mood light with jokes were like a punch to his gut. Hearing you say he wasn’t your type made him feel a twinge of sadness, wishing he was and wondering if you were just lying again. He sighed, telling himself that maybe you weren’t interested after all.

Matt suppressed his emotions with a chuckle, "alright, alright, you don’t have to bruise my ego like that," he bantered back, noticing your attempt to lighten up the mood. He couldn’t be feeling this bad knowing he was the one that just told you all that bullshit, but here he was.

His gaze landed on Chris who just stumbled out of his room, looking sleepy and grumpy. Watching as he halted in his step, his eyes darting back and forth between you and Matt, confused but annoyed, "can you guys like not stand there? I have to piss really badly." Matt stiffled a soft chuckle as he exited the bathroom with you.

𓆩♡𓆪

The rest of the day went on as planned, but he couldn’t get rid of the drop in his gut. Did he make a mistake? Should he talk to you again? He didn’t know what to do, or what was the right decision, but one thing was for sure—he had made a bad decision. The storming emotions swirling inside Matt matched the thunderstorm outside.

𓆩♡𓆪

part. 1 2 3

Masterlist 𓆩♡𓆪 Taglist

Taglist: @strnilolover @mattsfavoritestar @sophand4n4 @tpwktahlz @lilyyliloo @slut4angstt @pvssychicken @poolover123 @loud-sturniolos @inlovewchrissturniolo @queenshet @chrisstopherfilmed @billiesbabya @h3arts4nat @moosegirl96 @sofiaaguilaxx @sturniolo-fann @goingtojohnkramershouse @sturniolosluttt @chrislilcumslvt @mattsninja @bilssturns @sturnioloszn @slvtf0rchr1s @knowingnothingnoel @shadowthesim @brookheartsmatt

Special taglist: @mattsredgaphoodie @blahblahblahm @sturniolosobsessed @emmaweasley @lvrsturniolo

© sweetshuga

[veilkeeper]

The Sacrifice of Souls, Part 1

alt title: the completely surmountable issue of dying

welcome to my 2-part essay about the conclusion of emmrich's story line. this part will focus on the actual quest(s) involved and analyze the decisions we make. part two will be about the effects on the romance, particularly as i am approaching it with my rook, corentin.

spoilers ahead! beware that both essays are going to assume you have completed The Sacrifice of Souls and at least one of the follow up quests, Heir to the Dead or Will and Testament. if you have not, i suggest returning to this later and playing it out yourself.

so what are we even talking about?

for my purposes, about 90% of the sacrifice of souls is irrelevant. here are the important bits: hezenkoss puppets a giant skeleton monster powered by the gloaming lantern, manfred sacrifices himself to rip it out of the thing's chest, and emmrich risks his life to free the souls trapped inside, symbolically overcoming his fear of death (for the moment).

when manfred's beautiful skeleton body is brought before the lich lords in the necropolis to ask if his spirit can be recovered, the lich lords give an ultimatum: they will allow emmrich to bring manfred back, but it will remove his candidacy for lichdom.

"how many exceptions 'til tyranny?" they say. if emmrich is to become a lich, he must be able to accept that people he cares about will die as he lives on.

emmrich is obviously extremely conflicted. he's being forced to choose between his life's work or having his pseudo-child back; he is torn because he at once wishes to spare himself the pain of losing someone, while also wanting to "honour death and let him rest."

from there, the choice is given to the player: encourage emmrich to bring manfred back, or encourage him to pursue his life's work and become a lich.

if you save manfred, it starts heir to the dead. you accompany emmrich to the necropolis, reminisce about manfred, and summon his wisp back to his body. he shows a newfound knack for magic and becomes an apprentice, while emmrich gets to go full dad-mode and commit to preparing manfred for the now inevitable future where, one day, emmrich will pass on. but when asked how he feels about that, emmrich simply says that though he will always wonder about what could have been, he "would not trade this for anything."

it's been brought to my attention that most people have probably picked the manfred ending without really thinking about it. which makes sense, everyone wants to save emmrich's (and if you're romancing him, your) skeleton son. but it does mean you haven't seen the lich ending, which is kind of a shame because it's also really good.

first, it does take a little convincing. it's not enough to simply say "but this is your life's work!" emmrich expresses that he wasn't prepared for the reality of what it actually meant to have people he cared about die (which is an interesting thing, because even though he is an orphan, his parents died when he was quite young. this may be the first time someone as important to him as manfred is has passed away while he was an adult who was able to fully process what that feels like). rook goes on to tell emmrich that it's enough to just remember those who have passed—while acknowledging that one day, they too will count among that number.

with that encouragement, emmrich agrees that he has to let manfred go, and he decides to begin preparation for his final rites into lichdom, starting the quest will and testament. like before, you accompany him to the necropolis, only this time you will be acting as his chosen witness as he enters the chambers beyond to have his soul measured by the dead and, if successful, will emerge as a lich.

as an aside, even if you have no intention to play the rest of the game with lich!emmrich, i highly recommend playing far enough to see the conclusion of this quest. there's a weight to it all, particularly if you've romanced him, and the cinematic is quite beautiful. you very much get the sense that you're sending your friend/lover away to potentially die.

when he emerges, it is as a lich—exactly as he said he would be. skeletal, but still in complete "possession of himself." it transitions to a short scene where he informs the rest of his friends of his transformation, and after receiving a response of support, his quest line is concluded.

okay, so why are you talking about this?

well, because it makes me insane, if you can't tell already by the fact that we're 600+ words into the first of two essays on the topic. but why does it make me insane?

the first answer to that, and perhaps the most important, is that the writing is really good. i'm going to say some critical things after this, so i want to be clear up-front that the writing is really good. sylvia feketekuty has managed to make a decision that otherwise would feel like a very black and white "good end" vs "bad end" feel like two viable, valid endings that just have different pros and cons lists.

and it's also just ludonarratively extremely good. all of the endings for our companions are meant to translate into a more support focused or a more combat focused "hero of the veilguard" ability, and for emmrich's these mesh extremely well with the conclusion of his story. an emmrich that has accepted a role as a caretaker for manfred is more supportive on the field, and an emmrich that has accepted a role as a powerful defender of the necropolis is more effective while fighting. it's by far the least important aspect of all this, but i enjoyed it and it's useful for something i'm going to say next so i wanted to put it here.

the second reason this makes me insane is that we are making two completely separate choices at the same time. we are answering two vastly different questions ("should you save manfred?" and "should you become a lich?") with a single dialogue option.

i understand why. combining these two choices and making them interdependent on each other raises the stakes. it's a really clever way to complicate what would otherwise be a wildly easy decision. it also, as said before, creates two extremely distinct endings for emmrich (see, i do these things for a reason), which is important not just for replayability but also for narrative satisfaction. endings that are extremely similar or that have no stakes make your choices as a player feel irrelevant, which is something that you don't want in an RPG. a non-lich emmrich without manfred is not going to feel like a significantly different ending than what emmrich had been doing before these quests concluded, and thus would not be satisfying. likewise, lich!emmrich with manfred would mean that emmrich would have everything he ever wanted with zero sacrifice, which is boring.

however... making these two choices at once puts us in a sticky spot, because they're contradictory. emmrich's arc has largely been about his inability to accept mortality—and not just his own. if you bring him along on blood of arlathan, you can overhear him responding to elgar'nan's attempts to entice him with the promise of being able to bring back the dead. despite being a Mourn Watcher, he just hasn't been able to bring himself to accept that people die, and you shouldn't be able to do anything about that (remember that big, bold lich lord quote up near the top?).

so when the climax for his arc comes along, you get to tell him to accept his death but not manfred's, or to accept manfred's death but not his own.

do you see the contradiction? nowhere in there are we truly encouraging him to accept the natural, inevitable cycle of life and death (as a Watcher probably should). we're just telling him which death he should accept as natural.

conclusion...?

i'm not saying either ending is unsatisfying, nor am i saying that there wasn't good reasons to write the endings as they are. for the purposes of this game, feketekuty did an amazing job with emmrich. she managed to take a character that i think in any other game would have been written off as boring and make his story extremely compelling.

but in a way, looking at it holistically and outside of the context of what bioware's writers were required to do, it feels like there's this massive gap there, where we've failed to properly address the actual underlying issue that made this choice so difficult for emmrich. and his brief bout of bravery at the end of the sacrifice of souls is forgotten, when it could have been potent fuel for an argument against lichdom as proof that he can face death when he has something to fight for (or even as an argument for lichdom; facing his death head-on like that may have only intensified his fear of his own fragility), but instead it just goes unaddressed.

additionally, by combining the choice to save manfred and the choice to become a lich, it removes the possibility for us as the player (and rook as a character) to voice concerns about what lichdom means and represents. to be fair, other characters largely handle this in banter (lucanis in particular has excellent banter about the cost of immortality, which i have briefly discussed before), but not being able to voice concerns, especially as emmrich's lover, feels like a missed opportunity.

in the most ideal world, we as the player would have been able to discuss lichdom, mourning and grief, our thoughts and feelings on death, etc with emmrich over multiple conversations, and through a tally of our expression of opinion on the topic, emmrich would come to a decision on lichdom and saving manfred himself. but due to the constraints of this being a video game, for obvious reasons that is not the case.

again, i cannot stress enough that i actually loved this quest line. regardless of your decision, emmrich ends up in a place he can find satisfaction, and his journey feels earned. i fully recommend trying out both endings in replays, because i think you might be surprised by how well they both work. i just think there's a little bit left on the table still.

which gives me something to play with. stay tuned for part 2 on the romance stuff. we're going to need a scalpel for the gutting we're doing.

(link to part 2)