#i think melody would just not go
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Pray for me I'm going to get blood drawn and it's very scary and painful
#i am being gods bravest soldier#on that note i should give my characters like doctor related headcanons#cream has to go to a programmer over a doctor#needles do not pierce their flesh#gotta get software updated and grt sick with the idiot virus#note is routinely seen by the medical corps and always gives them a fright#shed be bleeding and go “oh its just a scratch!”#freddy would be terrified of going doctors#his ass will need a lollipop and stickers after#tell him he did good he might cry#i think melody would just not go#she has god on speed dial#she'll just ask it to fix it#it won't work she will be forced to go#like a cat going to the vet#pansy would go#but honestly whatever blood is gotten out of them will be like oil#would probably melt the syringe
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ask me about my sanrio x solar opposites cross over collab
#solar opposites#tervo#family heart emoji#i have many thoughts#im projecting on terry but i think his favorite would more likely be keroppi#but he can like my melody because i said so#yumyulack pretends to not like any of them but of coursr kuromi#jessie likes them all and would like my melody but i feel like shed go “actually shes a poser... i stand with the og.. hello kitty herself”#and korvo i just think would like maru#:]#my art#terry opposites#korvo opposites#yumyulack opposites#jesse opposites#idk how to tag stuff lol#i spelt jesses name wrong in one of my tags my bad i just like ie when its that eeee sound at the end of a word#oh and pupa would just watch the hello kitty show
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wip covers for playlists of stuff i think they’d listen to. spotify links if you wanna check em out vvv
squabble | rig | carrion | jerryjack
#rig and carrion’s are particularly good imo#rig listens to jazz/jazz fusion/math rock and similar#carrion’s playlist is pretty diverse in genre but i tried to go for generally atmospheric type stuff#and ending with melody 8 which is mainly for the bit cause it’s not good on a playlist but i absolutely think carrion would like it#it’s 28 minutes of improvisational noise#squabble’s is pretty scuffed lol. it was so hard to choose stuff for her#doodles#music posting#notably not really things that are like lyrically representative of them. just stuff they’d like#hence the hand that feeds on squabble’s#ocs#squabble the pigeon#rig the fox-bat#carrion the cat#jerryjack the hare#deadeye delivery
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Wverytime I sit down at a computer to make music I get so scared
#i like siting down with a guitar and writing music but the daw is still so scary to me and i dont know how to make it less scary#its like i dont know where to start#i understand music theory i can write chord progressions i can write melodies but arranging feels so daunting#like just trying to pick keyboard voices and stuff im like overwhelmed and then its like i just dont even know where to start#i think i need to do more covers to practice arranging because trying to do it with my own songs im just like i have NO IDEA#i do think that trying to recreate arrangements of other songs I like will help me but also just idk#i really want to get better at writing at the piano but i find it really hard#rn i write almost all my songs on the guitar then i guess what i have to do is try to think of like what style i want it to have#and sort of try to create a map like probably literally on paper and then try to go in and sort of do it but god its so hard i dont know#it feels so so daunting#even trying to make silly little stuff with just like some synths is really hard for me right now its so out of my comfort zone and AUGH id#its frustrating im scared of the computer but i also very much do not want to be an acoustic singer songwriter but thats all i can do#because all i can do is play fucking guitar!!!! and its just so frustrating#technically im like with a midi controller i should be able to do whatever program drums write little synth lines etc i dont have to like#know how to play piano and yet whenever i try to do it i just get so overwhelmed and freaked out with how many possibilities there are#that i just . cannnnnt#AHGHHHHHHHHHHHH im so im in such a bad mood right ow#ive had such a horrible night honestly#i think i will just go engage in fixation for comfort and then go to bed sigh#i dont know what to do to improve at making music in the daw i guess ill just maybe try again this weekend to take another crack at it#god its just so frustrating that i only started writing songs 2 years ago and have only learned to use a daw in the last 3 months i WISH#that i was one of these teenagers who spent all my time writing silly songs and playing around with a midi controller but i just didnt#because i was scared!!!!!!!#playing the guitar and singing has always been like the only thing that felt safe cos i felt if i tried to actually write and arrange songs#by myself i would fail so now i just feel so frustrated because i dont feel like a real musician and i feel like im starting too late#AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH whatever sorry for using the tags of this post as my diary but#i am frustrated!!!!
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I fell back into my Clone Wars phase (obsession?) a few months ago (in case that wasn't obvious lol) and I kinda wanted to write a tab but I was like nah the trumpet solo ain't exactly gonna work on kalimba
But THEN! Kevin Kiner hit me with that soft lullaby version of the clones theme when Echo leaves the batch :,(
So after many a hour of transposing and what not I'm happy to finally be able to share this
youtube
Tabs | Score | Track | Scene
(Omega's Theme coming "soon")
#this song gets me every time it's so emotional ahh#I’d heard he was gonna leave but I didn’t think it would be so early in the season :(#esp when he was already absent for 2 episodes#honestly it's very in character and its the choice that makes the most sense for him#but it's just a shame the rest of the batch couldn't see the importance and come with him#like really after everything that happened in that ep yall are just gonna go back to racing and treasure hunts?#star wars#clone wars#the bad batch#tbb#tbb s2#arc trooper echo#tbb echo#tbb omega#kevin kiner#kalimba#kalimba tabs#also ignore how my high G messes with the melody its stuck or something and idk how to fix it#also my hands were COLD
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Cozytober - Day 18 - Soup
Y'know we'll have to clean this up, right?
#Cozytober#Margot's RF Art#Rune Factory#Rune Factory Frontier#RF#RF1#RFF#RF Frontier#Turning the entire bath house into a giant pot of soup just feels like a scheme of Melody's. IDK for what reason or festival#But I would not put it past her at all#Mist would 100% help and I think Rosetta just wants to see the carnage#local farmer is just aghast seeing where his hard work has gone- lucky he'll eventually find it funny too#Y'know I was sort of dreading this day for a bit because I thought my sketch was pretty lame. A stupid idea#then I realized I just needed to change the poses and BAM. NOW I LOVE IT.#I also wound up putting on the 1st RDJ Sherlock Holmes in order to make myself finish this as I was being rather lazy today#'how fast can I get this done- before or after Blackwood dies-' answer is right at the scene of his supposed resurrection#VERY fun movie- going to watch the rest and get work done on tomorrow's prompt#Rune Factory Mist#RF Mist#Rune Factory Rosetta#RF Rosetta#Rune Factory Melody#RF Melody
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Sometimes i wonder if the reason Sora held Kairi's hand like that at the end of KH3 is because he was giving her lucky charm back to her
#this is not a theory. there is no evidence for this at all so dont really take this seriously but sometimes i just think about it#'be sure to bring it back to me.' would thinking you are never coming back be a good time to fulfill that promise#and i feel like it would really go with the theme melody of memories set up too with her being one of the keys to finding sora#kingdom hearts#bee speaks#she literally says its a charm to help find eachother if they get separated. HOW MUCH MORE SEPARATED COULD THEY BE
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Hiiiii! So, a few days ago you were talking about the whole thing with Amy, Rory, and River. And when I saw those posts a thought arose in my head and I wish to share it with you.
Since River grew up with Amy and Rory as Mels. And Mels was Amy's best friend do you think that they ever talked about children? Since I know that it can come up when talking with friends, and like... do you think that Amy might've ever expressed whether or not she wanted children?
And if she didn't, that Mels would've had to listen to her mother say that she doesn't want children? The idea is so heartbreaking and sooo interesting.
What do you think about it?
no, no, see, you're so right and this drives me wild.
because, the way i see it, i don't think amy wanted children. she's somewhere on the 'hasn't thought about it' to 'vaguely negative feelings about it happening' range to me, which falls sharply into 'Not Happening Ever Again' post-s6. (specifically, in terms of having a kid herself, even if she could, i really don't think she would. i do love that she and rory end up adopting a kid later, because that does make sense, for amy pond who grew up alone in one universe with her family swallowed by cracks in time before the doctor helped her set it right again, for her to want to make sure another child won't be alone in the world like she was. getting off-track here.)
and that's so. because the first real memory river/mels has of amy is of amy shooting at her. and depending on how well the silence fucked up the rest of her memory, it might be one of the very first memories she has at all. that's how she met her mother, crying for help and getting a bullet instead. her mother tried to kill her, so of course, you have to think. she must have needed to hear that she was wanted, right? even if she was taken away, even if amy shot her, at some point, melody must have been wanted?
river is good at getting people to do what she wants, but she is very, very bad at subtlety. and mels is younger, has less practice, so when she wants to know this, she's just going to ask. blunt and quick, easy enough because amy's used to the way mels will open her mouth and you just have to be ready to roll with what comes out if you want to keep up. it's why they're such good friends (like mother, like daughter.)
they're nine, and mels asks if amy wants kids, and amy wrinkles up her nose and says she won't have time for children, obviously, once her raggedy doctor finally comes back. they're fifteen, and amy and rory dance will they-won't they in a way that makes mels twitchy to watch, and taunting amy about wanting to have rory's babies is a good way to get on her nerves. but amy calls her gross, tells her she's got more life planned than children would leave room for, and besides, imagine her, a mom? it'd be a disaster.
mels does. a lot. she looks at her mother and just sees her best friend instead. she's not even sure what she wishes was there, but. maybe amy's right. and besides. imagine her, a daughter, instead of the ticking time bomb she really is? it'd be a disaster.
they're sixteen, seventeen, eighteen, and on. mels stands on the outside of a love story that births a universe. and her. how do you compete with that? not that she would know, not yet, she hasn't been there. but it doesn't make her feel any less alienated when amy and rory talk in whispers about a half-remembered world that's bled through to this life, about roman soldiers and boxes and the big bang of belief.
all these memories, they never mention children. on amy's wedding day, she's different, not like someone remembering a dream but someone who lived it. rory stands straighter, won't leave her side, and they're both so much older than they were yesterday. maybe now, right? a wedding's as good a time as any to decide you want kids.
mels not being at amy & rory's wedding is such an obvious lazy way of them trying to explain why they totally didn't just throw this plot twist together at the last minute that i'm not even going to acknowledge it. of course she was at their wedding. she's their best friend. there's too many people around the doctor, and she wasn't ready today of all days, so despite this horrible burning need under her skin to strike, she stays her hand. doesn't let him dance with her because she might just tear his throat out if he gets too close. stays with amy and rory as the maid of honor should. she must have been there for the awkward questions that always gets asked, 'so, any plans for a baby?' 'when am i getting grandkids?' 'oh, you two are going to have gorgeous children together.' standing a few feet from amy in her wedding dress and watching her mother tense and grit her teeth and brush off the questions. watching her look nervously at rory but never ask if he means it when his mom asks him if he'd prefer a son or a daughter, and rory answers 'either one, some day, not anytime soon.'
god i'm just going on and on, aren't i. but really, what's it like to know that amy never changed her mind. the next time she sees them, she's already been born and stolen. i don't like let's kill hitler for. so many reasons. but there is something compelling about how recklessly river lashes out at the world, at the doctor. even her sacrifice at the end is almost suicidal, throwing all her regenerations into this man without knowing if that will even work or if it might kill her to do it. but it makes more sense in the context of someone who has reached the end of a long, long wait for some kind of indication, any kind, that her mother wanted to have her. and finally been told, no. she didn't choose melody.
#like. to be clear also: i don't think the fact that amy didn't want kids and really didn't have a choice in giving birth to river#means that she wouldn't love river. i think it would make their relationship Complicated but i do think amy loves her. so much.#that's her daughter but it's also her best friend.#but like. god. to spend your whole childhood hoping you'll hear about some little glimmer of yourself.#a dream. a passing mention. a debate on baby names. anything. and to hear nothing.#and river is. like. she is really really bad at relationships right? we know this.#the person she's closest to is the doctor and she spends most of her life believing *he doesn't even love her*.#we're talking about someone whose base assumption about everyone is that they will try to hurt her at some point so she should always keep#one hand armed.#and her mother. didn't choose to have her. didn't have that choice. that has to fuck her up a little.#(and also serve as proof that river is. so so bad at knowing when she is loved. because maybe amy didn't choose to have her but she named#melody pond after mels her best friend. she has been choosing river every day for the past however many years since mels decided to come#here and be near her mom and dad even if only as kids. but river still can't see it.#and. given the nature of how the ponds disappear from her life. and we never get any closure about them and river.#you have to wonder if she ever did. river song do you know your mother loves you?#having the melody-as-river reveal be so close to the end of the season and then getting rid of amy & rory before they can actually do#anything with the three of them as a messed up little family unit is the show's biggest crime. because i don't know! i don't know if river#knew her parents loved her! i don't know if she *ever* came to terms with how she was born and how they didn't need to choose her then to#choose her now! i don't know if river ever really felt comfortable thinking of them as her parents rather than her friends?#according to the transcripts. river calls amy 'mother' twice. (and 'mummy' once jokingly.) she calls rory 'father' once. and 'dad' in angel#in manhattan. and it just. it drives insane right? it's almost weirdly formal. like the words aren't right but she knows she should say the#and. and. i don't think i'm ever going to get over river song.#i think that's the takeaway here.#ask#doctor who#river song#amy pond#rory williams
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i need to. make cheat cards. for jazz standards. because i dont need to look at a written bassline or even the full lead sheet i just. need chord names. bc i cannot memorize them fully.
#constance speaks#ughhhh ive been working on the same 5 standards all semester and.#i still only have 2 like. actually memorized (changes and melody line)#but one of them i reeeeeally dont want to play at the jam session im going to tonight bc. i think i'd have to play the melody.#and i have 2 more that. forgoing the melody. i am SO CLOSE ON. but i just CANT QUITE GET IT.#the 5th one is latin. so. it would take me a Lot more to memorize that bassline.#why did no one tell me jazz is hard. i feel betrayed by my previous band director.
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I fuckin.. I need I need my art to be better man..
I need it to be looser, i need more Life, more Energy, more Colour!!!!! more Stylization!!!!!!! more SHAPES!!!!!! Mood Mood and Tone and Feeling!!!!!!!!!!
and less whatever weird archaic constraints I am holding from Highschool that I can't seem to shake off
I need to Break It a little bit, I need to Bend it until it Sings again..
#Monster noises#unlike my usual Art Gripe posts this one isn't about me looking at my art and seeing something Mediocre#it's me looking at the Objectively Technically Successful thing I'm working on/recently posted and Feeling Nothing From It#and I mean sure we'll chalk a little bit of that up to the depression#cause whether or not I'm feeling Things about the stylization of my work I Should be more giddy than I am#about the husbands finally getting Nasty#outside of just my brain space#but putting that aside the point remains#I'm disappointed by the pieces (and many of my recent pieces and many pieces going back years) lack of Dynamism#I want to capture what the Feeling in image is more than an actual Depiction of the Thing if that makes sense?#Poses should be Pushed#Anatomy eskewed for Shape and expression#but I always always Always Shrink Back#I get to a point and I start thinking 'this looks wrong' and I pull back#I pull back to try and make it look 'right'#and end up reducing it to something...#not Stiff#but limp?#metaphysically Limp#Lacking in the evocative expression I wanted it to have#can you /feel/ the arch of his back like a melody in the back of your head?#or is he just like.. clearly arching his back like a human person would#there's a tacit difference and I am disappointment how rarely I hit the mark on the former#and this is an Old thing and Old old thing#that started in highschool#a long-term bad chain of experiences with a friend and trying to learn to be better artists together#not understanding my needs and how my brain works and trying to fit in a very specific hole i didn't want to fit in#and being chastised for it (though the slight was probably more Received than Intended)#what broke me out of that last time#and kept me from giving up drawing basically
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internalized ableism that you didnt know was there will make you do things like reinvent being a ambulatory wheelchair user apparently
#comeing to terms with the fact that am not dramatic and even though am in WAY less pain then when i was in school#my bones still got torn apart very slowly by stress muscle tension for years#amd that will be with me for the rest of my life witch i was already fine with idk what it is about this#so even though i dont technically need a mobility aid i would probably be more comfortable with 1#as long as it has an option to fold it up to walk when i need to#(not moving doesnt hurt the way people use that word but it can feel just as bad as my hip deciding to tease dislocating itself)#ourghhgh#chirps#am so not sure of myself and my wife is going to make me cry is she keeps being this amazing#god of melody and making me feel supported and accsepted without turning it into a whole thing that singles me out#lala isnt awake yet but i didnt even think about maybe getting an aid until ey asked me what i use so this is team to me <33#<-ALOTT of things dont hurt to me in a way that people descibe pain but pain is the closest thing i have to tell anybody what am feeling so#maybe i just misunderstood what pain is???????#i dont have words for it but most of the times i would rather be in pain
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⋆ You guys need to stop giving me IDEAS djhsbdjhs-/j I instantly had to start doodling a concept for....uh, her/them. (I can’t come up with a name for her.) I’m sure this won’t be her final look, but I tried my best with what I had. I’ll explain her design in the tags, but I think it’s pretty self-explanatory. ⋆ ⋆ Anyone have any name ideas? ⋆
#poptropica#ai merlin#my doodles#i was thinking maybe piper?#i was also trying to look into bird related names like raven#i saw avis and melody#and then it would be melody and merlin!#m and m#ANYWAY#design#so her hair resembles her creator because of course#it's just longer and dyed green to match the clothes#i obviously had to give her the cute raven nose#because i'm sure that in the future when he is redeemed#he would come in terms with loving himself and his appearance#her color scheme was originally going to be red and black#to match raven#but i went with green instead to match the actual machine#much like the blue on merlin's mechanism#and tried to give her a hardcore aesthetic?#if that's the right word#the rib cage design on her shirt matches the rib cage on the actual machine#and yeah#she would also have raven wings and claws#and....yeah#she is very tol#i think she might be a bit taller than my bard#and he's taaaaalll#but yee!!#it's 2am i need to go to bed
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there's this one photo I've seen floating around a few times with the words "I wish we could've met as kids, you would've loved the softer me" and I think about it every now and then
so ... art ʅ(๑ ᷄ω ᷅ )ʃ
#''what if they met as kids'' AU basically djdkskl#also i discovered this rly fun music album and was listening to it while working on this fjdksl its called Portrait by The 5th Element !!#theres this one rly weird song on it fjdkdl I assume theyre american bc its like uhh. that one american thing. declaration of independence?#idk fjfkdl i think thats what that is. no idea though im not american SHSJSKL#ANYWAYS GOOD ALBUM besides that one part of the medley song but even that is kind of a fun melody to it#BUT YEAH. meeting as kids. i want to explore the concept a little more fhfkdl#i think it'd be sweet to explore them being friends and going on adventures and OH GOD im just turning Guz into an OC now arent i... OOPS#OH WELL. INTO THE REALM OF OOC WE GOOOOO BRAVELY MARCHING INTO THE FOG DJDKDL#HE'S NOT AN OC HE'S STILL THE SAME CHARACTERRR IM JUST SQUISHING HIM AROUND LIKE SILLY PUTTY AND SEEING WHAT HAPPENS#THE ONLY ISSUE WITH THIS. is that i would need to remember what i was like as a kid. but i do not hold those memories fjfkdl#those are held by another part of the brain. ACK!! good thing i have imagination and can make shit up based on childhood report cards LMAO#dandyshucks#junebug 🪲#dandy doodlebugs#💜so good at being in trouble#MAYBE KIND OF A WEIRD POST FOR A SELFSHIP BLOG. idk if anyone else has done this. BUT ITS MY BLOG I GUESS#boldly going into the unknown... excelsior!!! onwards and upwards!! new AUs and ideas to explore!! lots of fun to be had!!#💜a boy and his bug🪲
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It's always funny Almost completely relating to people's posts about being obsessed with a piece of media but it's clear they mean like a TV show or movie and are obsessed with one of the characters but for me it's literally always always with no exception some fucking band so it's not really the same but it does have the same completely all consuming effect on me
#i dont get obsessed with fictional characters ever but i do get fixated on some fucking guy from real life who makes music#which also means i dont really interact with the stuff im fixated on in the same way others who are primarily into fictional stuff seem to#be which is a good thing because it would be weird if i did but it means i can always ALMOST really relate but not quite#my version of making art of thing im obsessed with is sitting at my keyboard analyzing melodies and then crying a little but its fine#but yeah idk why but i have a difficult time getting obsessed with like a fictional piece of media ill enjoy it but it doesnt go farther#sometimes i latch onto characters somewhat where im like oh theyre me but its not the same#but um to be honest i think its cos i just dont really care unless its music cos music is kind of the only thing i get this excited about#ever !!!!! which is like . i mean its fine its just my whole life#like many people i can track the trajectory of my life based on whatever my months to years long specific media fixation was at the time#and like theres only been maybe 1 or 2 things that werent bands / musical artists#and then like as far as non media stuff goes music has just dominated my brain for basicslly my whole life except the only other thing that#comes close is linguistics/language learning which i think theres a LOT of parallels between the two so it makes sense#hm actually maybe 1 or 2 is low its definitely been more than that but the split of music and then non music stuff is like 80 to 20 percent
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ouuugh thinking about the Death Note OST again
#the way that Light and L's themes compliment one another but can't be overlapped is SO cool to me dshjgkdfh#And i literally just tried overlapping them and realized it would take a LOT of work to get it to sound good lmfao dgjhkfdh#they're in different keys and slightly different BPMs and though their melodies compliment one another they don't fully line up#and I think that's like. REALLY neat storytelling!! because that reflects them as characters!!#However I do believe when they finally meet in the anime it plays both of their themes and it sounds sick as fuck but my point still stands#death note#I could. go on for a WHILE about Death Note it is such a well written piece of media#and i think there's a LOT of room for interesting analysis#Death Note is supposed to be a tragedy and Light Yagami is actually a really interesting character in this essay I-
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no one ever talks about how Not being a dsmp fan was so fucking isolating during and after the first quarantine lockdowns dude
#heavenly melodies#before the major callouts and shit#that dude never sat right with me and my social life never recovered#i tried so hard to become friends with the juniors in my school pre graduation bc my school used to have a solid relationship between the#grade levels but they would never really talk to me and the only thing they were all interested was in the green motherfucker and co#so i literally just couldn't make conversation with them and thus got myself isolated out of a club i felt like i really belonged in#it makes me double sad thinking back onthis bc we held a valentines day celebration (my idea btw) that i couldnt celebrate with them bc i#had to go to the optometrist but i still made them little bags with candy and made them stickers myself (designed and cut them all out)#and none of them ever thanked me for it or told me how they missed me at the celebration or saved me any treats :(#i tried so hard and from what. to jump the favoritism scale down to hated with the teacher that was our sponsor that i thought i could#confide in? because i became the last one standing to finish our club projects and couldn't do it anymore bc of how isolated i felt and she#got mad at me for getting fed up with being so lonely that i had to quit because it all genuinely hurt so fucking much?#they wouldnt even say hi to me in the halls when we were phasing to hybrid learning dude#they walked right next to me in the stairwell once and i kept saying hi but they just looked the other way and wouldnt talk to me#we were literally shoulder to shoulder and they just ignored me. it was not good. like at all bc they werent wearing masks but it sucked
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