#i think it can be easy to make this one ugly
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
0573 Cinccino
#pokemon#apokemonaday#dailydex#art#dualcosmog#pkmn#pokedex#pokedex challenge#artists on tumblr#gen5#gen5pokemon#cinccino#i think it can be easy to make this one ugly#but i think i managed to avoid it!!
21 notes
·
View notes
Text
I STAND by this (btw i wrote this 23 military time so it might be messy and a bit crazy, i don’t have sources but.. most of the proof i got has been talked about on Tumblr, i’m not someone who thinks about this stuff without some sort of base. Unless it’s something i really wanna think about.)
I love Snape, he’s so intriguing and the only character i can properly relate to. I get what it feels to make bad choices that other people never forget. I feel like Snape is the perfect morally grey character that all us 2 thousand mistakes losers can relate to.
I hate how the marauder fandom hate Snape cause he’s mean to children and is “ugly”.. Like my guy is literally a rockstar with how he’s described!! HES NEVER EVEN CALLED UGLY. And then these curtain lovers (yes that was a Stranger things ref, link at bottom) Stan and bow down to characters with half a page of info! Don’t get me wrong, i love Eileen Prince (which i don’t see enough of) and Regulus black, all of that sort. But come on man… Barty jr is not an angel compared to Snape! Thats a canon fact, he’s a cold blooded murderer. Snape feels remorse! For Lily OR not, it wouldn’t matter cause the same was with Regulus. He betrayed Tom for his house elf, not muggleborns. Snape betrayed for his MUGGLEBORN childhood friend. Pretty similar huh?
Just because Snape is weird and had unrequited feelings who he never forgot doesn’t mean he’s a creep?? Also saying Snape would touch Harry like THAT if he looked like his mother is HELLA icky. Don’t take traumatized characters with flaws and make them worse. People who have been in Snape’s situation will feel like shit. If i hear one more person saying that crap I’m gonna go insane. Because it connects to a much worse problem in real life. Curtain lovers (i cant find a better name, its just so broad) have always blamed the “Losers” for unordinary or bad situations, stuff that doesn’t fit well. Or stuff the Curtain lovers messed up on. An example would be the past belief that witches lived among us. Now, i don’t want to bring real life situations into this, but hey, at least I’m not saying that Death eaters ARE the Nazi’s…
“Witches” consisted of people the curtain loving in command people (i would say government but idk if it was called that back then, oh well. I’ll just say curtain lovers) found a threat. People that were out of the ordinary. People that thought differently, that were WEIRD and easy to miss-understand. The curtain lovers would blame misfortunes on witches. Uncle Sam’s crops died? Sweetie call the priest cause it’s another darn witch! Oh I’m sorry Rebecca? You like books? As a woman?? I need to call the priest you filthy witch!
I know this might be a bit too deep for some god darn children books but saying Snape would SA Lily is such a dirty way to say you hate a character that you don’t even try to understand. It really dives into what type of person you are.
Also, hating Snape for being weird is SOO hypocritical. I mean, have you seen the other Harry Potter fans? Eughh.. I don’t even wanna think about the Tom Felton fans 🤢. That poor guy.
My point is that undermining a character is the least diverse thing you could do.
And the thing og blog said about Snape looking Jewish really adds to it. People really pick and take favorites. Leaving others to rot.
Hope you like this text. I might make a more proper argument in the future, its too darn late rn.
Marauders fans just be having double standards on the point they proud themselves the most on: Diversity
They be like "let's make James brown" (ik that it's in the whole fandom in general but ykwim) and reject the Jewish-looking guy
They be like "let's make Lily obese" and reject the underweight guy
They be like "let's make Regulus abused" and reject the canonically abused guy
They be like "let's make Regulus get groomed into joining the DEs" and reject the canonically groomed guy
They be like "let's make Barty's actions look right by saying it was for love" and reject the guy who did everything for the girl he loved (platonically or not)
Double standards, double standards everywhere.
Diversity only exists if Snape is not involved
#harry potter#snape defense#im serious#dead serious#and no i dont mean Black#lmaooo#long text#i think
233 notes
·
View notes
Note
cw cannibalism
No because the idea of Simon loving you so much he’d be willing to feel your flesh in his mouth :( ties in greatly with his history as a butcher. His love is all-consuming, overwhelming. This carnal desire for you to take something so inherent to you to give to him. He hasn’t known gentleness or kindness. When you two consume each other it’s the only way for him to truly express his love. Always have a piece of you in him. For him to feed off of the sustenance that only another human can provide. It’s pure intimacy, what could be more vulnerable than letting someone become a part of you?
my goddd anon this is perfect like you get me!!! also it's funny bc i'm listening to the first taste by fiona apple and like. yeah. i think it fits here kinda
cw: graphic depictions of cannibalism, body horror, and death
i like the idea of simon trying to fight it at first, assuming it's just his brain juggling around a few intrusive thoughts in an attempt to taint the only reason he's even alive still, only to slowly give in because he loves you so deeply it aches.
his heart shouldn't flutter at the image of snapping you between his jaw and tearing you apart, huffing and snarling until blood is spilling into his mouth and pieces of flesh stick in his teeth. he shouldn't swoon at the thought of swallowing you down, of treasuring a part of you in his rotten body so that you're with him always.
he doesn't know how to muzzle his hunger because all he knows is to take, to bite with the intention of breaking skin until his prey eventually becomes pliant, if it isn't already dead. but when it comes to you, it's how he shows his unconditional love and devotion, and you know this.
he wonders if you'd let him eat your heart next, just so he can understand what perfection tastes like. he wants to feel your innards flow down and settle in his belly, warming his body from the inside. he almost mourns the fact that he can't just take a piece of your heart and shove it next to his own, just so that you're connected even when he's halfway around the world.
it's what he loves so much about you: the fact that you're not easy to break, that you also have teeth—sharp, pearly whites that like to beam gleefully at him—and he wonders if you've ever thought about consuming him too. if you've gotten the urge to replace all of the ugly scars on his body with your bite marks, or if you've wanted to just completely rip them off his skin and greedily gnaw away. the one on his ribs would be a good start, and he can imagine you prodding around his insides after feasting on him, maybe blessing his poor little heart with a few kisses.
he says a quiet prayer in his mind when he sits you down one evening, hoping to whatever is out there that you won't take off running as he unboxes all of his inner turmoil. he doesn't see the way you lean in closer, too busy minding a spot on the carpet, but it does catch him off guard when you cut him off mid-ramble about how lovely he thinks your blood would taste on his tongue with a kiss. the feel of your soft lips against his while he was talking about something so horrific should have been enough to snap him out of his sick fantasies, but the way you kiss him so deeply, as if you're impatient for him to taste you, too, has his stomach twisting in all the right ways. he can't wait to feel close to you, to truly be one with his girl.
his very own bread and wine.
alternatively, the first and last time simon gets to taste you is when you're dying, very bones-and-all-esque. you're lying on the ground, a bullet lodged in your chest as he tries his very best to keep you alive, only to realise with choked-up desperation that you're not going to make it. he doesn't even question it when you shakily reach up to tug his mask off, nor does he pull away when you weakly guide his head down. you mumble a faint eat me, baby, and he does. gorging himself on your body because even in death, you give, and he takes.
#sorry for the abrupt endings 😭#not sure if i like this tbh#ghost#simon ghost riley x reader#simon riley x reader#rainwrites 𐙚
62 notes
·
View notes
Text
Shiratorizawa Hcs !!
This posts includes hcs about Ushijima Wakatoshi, Tendou Satori, Semi Eita, and Shirabu Kenjiro. I apologize for the short post and short selection of people, I'm just not too sure how to characterize the rest of them..
Ushijima
When you two first get together, he isn't really sure what to do since he hasn't had any past relationship experience. So he tries to take it slow. He's a little too nervous to kiss you, so he just decides on hand holding for now. And you bet he's gonna be holding your hand for a while.
He's not too good with his words, not really knowing how to voice his emotions or what words to describe the way that he's feeling, so his love language is physical touch and gift giving. He'll often give you little trinkets that he finds that reminds him of you, or he'll just come up from behind you and wrap his arms around his waist, pressing a kkiss to your temple. (Once you two have gotten comfortable in your relationship, he finds it's easier kissing you now since he's not as nervous as before)
Ushijima's hand is LARGE compared to yours. Like, seriously, he's like a giant compared to you. When he puts his hand on your thigh, his hand covers most of your thigh, when you two are holding hands, your fingers are usually engulfed by his.
He's not the type to get jealous easily, but he does get a little jealous when you're talking to someone else without him. He'll try and hold off on showing his jealousy, but he can't take it any longer and eventually just walks up to you, holding your hand without saying a word.
Tendou
He'll be really scared to confess to you. He's scared he's too ugly or weird-looking and that you'll laugh in his face when he confesses. Due to the bullying in his past, it hasn't made it easy to make friends, so he's just glad he has you. He doesn't want to confess in fear of ruining the friendship between you two. But when you come to him and tell him how you feel, he's pleasantly surprised. He just kinda stays there for a moment before smiling and telling you how he feels as well.
When you two start dating, he starts to get a little more affectionate. He'll hold onto your hand or your arm, sneak in a little more compliments directed to you, (he already compliments you a lot) and, if you'll let him, he'll draw little stars and other shapes on your hand while you're doing something else.
When Tendou has a bad day, he always comes to you for comfort, since he knows you'll be the one to give him the reassurance he needs. He'll sit down right next to you, letting his head fall onto your shoulder as a sigh escapes his lips. You usually pull him closer, sometimes even into your lap, and just hold him. Tracing shapes into his back while asking him what went wrong about today.
Semi
When you come over to his house, he'll show you his guitar and even play a song for you. His voice is angelic as he sings carefully picked out words in the phrasing of a poem specifically for you. He'll strum the guitar with gentle, carefuly hands. He'll even show you how to play the guitar and the song he wrote for you.
Semi thinks of you late at night, and usually the thought doesn't go away until he sees you again. So, to help him get through his nagging thoughts, he makes multiple playlists specifically for you. All filled with love songs or songs he thinks you'd like. He'd listen to the playlist for the whole night, eventually falling asleep to it. He sends you the link to it the next morning in hopes you'll like it. You always like his playlists.
He'll call you many pet names. Babe, sweetheart, darling, babygirl/boy. Just whatever you can think of, he'll call you. When he first did it, it just kind of slipped out. He called out for you to ask you for some help on something, but instead of calling out your name, he just called out "babe." He was so embarrassed about it, but was relieved when he found out you liked it. He just likes to see you happy.
You two often have late night calls that last for hours. It starts with one of you saying, "I couldn't sleep," which was true at first, but now it's just an excuse to talk to each other. You'll ramble on about different topics, and so will he. His topics usually consist of upcoming practice matches in volleyball, upcoming gigs he had at restaurants or shops to play his music, or sometimes even you. He'll just go on a rant about how much he loves you, complimenting every part of you, calling you beautiful from head to toe.
Shirabu
Shirabu doesn't know how to talk about how he feels. He has no idea how to start a conversation with you about how much he loves you, he doesn't know when to compliment you even if he's currently thinking of a million different compliments when you two are talking, he just doesn't know when to say it. Which is why he'll often put the many thoughts, compliments, words of adoration and affection into letters and poems that he'll write you after school, sticking them in your locker the next morning. He makes sure to sign his name at the bottom, a heart added next to it. He knows it sounds super cheesy, but he can't help it.
He doesn't like PDA too much since he knows his team is full of a bunch of nosy teenagers. He doesn't like it when people pry into his business like that. So he often doesn't hold your hand in public or anything, not wanting his team to find out about you two. But as soon as you two are alone- most likely in his room after school- he can't keep his hands to himself.
Shirabu isn't too good with his feelings, so he does get defensive often, but quickly puts his walls down when he realizes how he's acting to you. He doesn't use pet names since those make him feel awkward. If you like them, he'll try to use them, but it's just not for him.
#haikyuu#webco-dawnn#ushijima wakatoshi#haikyuu ushijima#hq ushijima#hq#tendo satori#tendou satori#haikyuu tendou#hq tendou#semi eita#haikyuu semi#hq semi#shirabu kenjirou#haikyuu shirabu#hq shirabu#headcanons#ushijima headcanons#tendou headcanons#semi headcanons#shirabu headcanons#pet names#hand holding#letters#poems#songs#guitar#music#ushijima fluff#shiratorizawa
25 notes
·
View notes
Note
wait i wanna hear about this frat boy 🫣
@zebonos GIRLLLL WHERE DO I EVEN START 😭😭
1. all of my friends say he’s ugly (he’s 6’3’’ sue me)
2. he snores SO LOUD
3. he punches and talks in his sleep
4. he has a cocaine addiction
5. he’s a bouncer at a bar that i’m a regular at
6. his head is too small and his eyes are uneven
7. he gets mad and insecure about my attraction to vinnie hacker
8. he is HORRIBLE at communicating (which was the ONE requirement i had when i agreed to let my friend set us up together. I said idc what he looks like, idc if he’s just wanting to fuck, he HAS to be good at communicating)
9. our second time together he marked me with hickies, begged me to stay the night, kissed me on my forehead, told me he wanted a future w me, etc
10. our 4th time together (we were awake for two hours mind you) he said he wanted to marry me 3 times, wanted to have kids with me 2 times, said i love you 4 times, planned what our engagement rings would look like, etc)
11. i ended up fucking his roommate and he had a talk with me about it. (“yeah…he’s a good guy, so much better than i could ever be for you…but whose bed are you in right now?”)
12. held my favorite pair of earrings hostage for a month
13. he does not like when i unadd him on snapchat and will ask ALL of my friends why im mad at him when ive told him i hate using snapchat for communicating bc its cancer.
14. he does not sleep in the dark
15. fucked a girl with an std
16. tried to get with me without telling me he fucked a girl with an std
17. tried to LIE about fucking a girl with an std
18. insane alcoholic. i watched him crush a 24 case of beer in two hours
19. doesn’t acknowledge me unless i’m actively ignoring him
20. he will STARE AT ME AND FOLLOW ME AROUND THE BAR ALL NIGHT if we are there at the same time (my friends have WITNESSED THIS HAPPENING) (( @megamett44-lover ))
21. will text me at 3:00-5:00 in the morning saying he needs to talk about stuff but i’m obviously ASLEEP
22. has not taken me on a proper date. (but he will buy my drinks and offers to buy me food if we go to cookout or mcdonald’s so i guess i can’t complain)
23. sleeps with socks on
24. hogs the blanket
25. doesn’t take out his trash and lets it pile up in his room
26. he has an awful haircut
27. left me alone immediately after sex for 23 minutes to go watch his roommate get his head shaved (no aftercare) and then was confused why i wouldn’t speak to him
28. did i mention he snores? did i also mention i get MAYBE an hour of sleep if i spend the night because its so bad??
29. tries to convince me not to make him use a condom
30. threw a fit one time bc a vinnie hacker edit came up on my phone so, in retaliation, he decided to look at thirst traps and sexual audios on tiktok for half an hour. i told him it was making me uncomfortable and told him to stop about six times and he only did when i threatened to leave.
31. would call me princess after i specifically told him NOT to do that.
32. beer pong with a bunch of his frat brothers is apparently a ‘date’ in his eyes…
33. didn’t acknowledge me at a party we were both attending until his buddy basically told him i wasn’t gonna keep pursuing him lmao
34. got so shit faced at the bar that he kept telling his frat brothers “isn’t she so pretty” “god im with the prettiest girl in (insert city name) right now” “im about to post her on my story” “should i buy her flowers” and i was so uncomfortable that i almost left the bar. (i had told him i wasn’t looking for anything serious and that pda made me uncomfortable)
35. he deadass chugged nyquil in front of me “to help him sleep”
36. has roaches in his bathroom (frat house)
37. refuses to smoke weed but will do 6 lines easy peasy???
38. not smart
39. thinks he can manipulate me (he can’t and it drives him crazy that i don’t fall for it)
40. asked me to find someone (female) to have a threesome with us (every inquiry made the same face before saying “no thanks”)
41. He hyper sexualizes my attraction to women
42. asked me if i’d block every guy in my phone for him (we had been talking for two weeks)
43. he’s an asshole to his dog and calls him mean names and hits his snout and shoves him around
44. he is persistent on trying to get me to blow him (i don’t do blowjobs. he knows this. still tries.)
45. he blew $160 gambling at the bar the night we went out 💀
46. he’s younger than me and extremely immature
47. he thinks listening to chief keef is an unheard of personality trait. (“i know all of the lyrics to Love Sosa” okay, so do 9 million other people)
Dude i could go on and on about this mf he’s WEIRD.
#sturniolo triplets#matt sturniolo#christopher sturniolo#chris sturniolo#nicolas sturniolo#sturniolo smut#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo x reader#i need him in a way that is concerning to feminism#sturniolo imagine
31 notes
·
View notes
Note
YESYES YES YES YE S
The sun is just starting to rise as Izumi eases her way back into the apartment, with her muscles aching pleasantly and her ever growing guilt complex aching not so pleasantly. She can still feel Dabi’s teeth in her shoulder and Shigaraki’s gloved hands at her waist. She can still taste cigarette smoke and cheap booze in the back of her mouth. She’s pretty sure there’s bruises that look like finger prints peaking out from under the hem of the shorts she’s wearing (so close to an old burn scar that she pointedly doesn’t think about) but it’s too dark to see still and if she doesn’t look too hard then she doesn’t have to remember how good it felt and then she can actually mean it this time when she says she’s not going to go back.
She’s guiding the door closed, carefully keeping the knob twisted so it doesn’t make a sound, when the lights flick on and her jump makes it slam closed under her hands.
She knows what she’s going to see before she turns. For half a second she debates not turning at all and just walking right back out the door she just came through, but there’s no way she would be allowed to go, and the idea having to explain to Mr. Aizawa why the cops were looking for her as a runaway gave her hives. (The thought that Shigaraki and Dabi would let her right back into the bar with sharp smiles and sharper kisses until she could convince her mom to calm down was even worse, actually. She didn’t want to think about why.)
“I’m home,” She says, not turning away from the door. She gets a sharp tug to her hair (not by a hand. No. Her mother would never dare to raise a finger to her… a quirk on the other hand) and she finally turns.
Her mom is frowning, still wrapped in the ugly dressing gown that Mitsuki swears was high fashion before Izumi was born, with her eyes narrowed at her. “Don’t know what time it is?” She hisses through clenched teeth. Around the room all the little trinkets on the shelf start to rattle with Inko’s temper. “I was just about to call the police and tell them you were missing! Honestly!”
It would be easier if Izumi shut her mouth, fell to her knees, and begged for forgiveness. Once she might have. When she was quirkless and alone in the world other than her mother. She would have thrown herself to the dirt under Inko’s heels and sobbed out broken pleas until she couldn’t breathe.
(She could smell smoke and taste cheap booze. She could feel gloved hands on her skin and teeth in her shoulder. She could hear a voice that sounded suspiciously like Dabi’s asking her where her fucking fire was.)
Izumi didn’t feel like doing things easy.
“Why should I come home? It’s not like you want me here?”
“Izumi!”
Izumi’s laugh is something harsh and white hot. Tinged with smoke and alcohol. A molotov thrown into a once quiet family home. “What do you want me to lie?! That’s all we do isn’t it! Lie and say that we’re one big happy fucking family! Maybe I got tired of lying.”
On the shelf across the room, a little glass bunny shatters, sending shards of green glass hurtling through the air. Neither of them look at the carnage.
“Why can’t you just act like a proper girl?!” Inko snaps back. “Ever since you developed this quirk you’ve been different! Sneaking out at all hours of the night, talking about being a hero, ignoring poor Katsuki when he comes to see you! I hardly even recognize you anymore!”
“You never did!” Izumi all but screams it at her, hellfire and decay in every word. She breathes hard in the stunned silence that follows, smelling ozone instead of smoke now. “You only saw what you wanted me to be. A perfect, helpless little girl that you couldn’t marry off to your best friend’s monster of a son and close your eyes to all the bruises and burns she couldn’t hide. So you know what? Fuck you.“
She turned, ignoring the sharper tug on her hair that bright tears to her eyes as she grabbed the doorknob hard enough to dent the metal. “Where do you think you’re going!?” Inko demanded.
“On a run. Don’t wait up.”
Maybe, if she was lucky, Dabi and Shiggy hadn’t gone to sleep yet and she could work the thrumming rage out of her system. If she was unlucky, well, it wouldn’t be the first time she had ran a few miles just to calm down.
Okay I 10000% hard agree with femslash Shigadabi. But I also raise you: lesbian shigadabideku? I feel this would add another level of fucked up sexual awakening.
Kissing you on the mouth
Imagine the corruption. Imagine sweet Izumi full of hopes and dreams of being a hero coughing after shotgunning a smoke from Dabi’s smirking lips. Imagine her hissing at Shigaraki that they will never be the same right before her back hits the wall and she feels chapped lips on hers and a tongue chasing the venom of her words back into her mouth. Imagine Izumi swearing every time she comes home covered in hickeys and smelling of smoke that she’s done. It’s over. There’s no way she’s going back. Imagine her in an all too familiar bar the very next night telling a laughing Dabi to shut up as she climbs into her lap and slams their lips together so hard she tastes blood as well as smoke.
Imagine.
#mha#bnha#sprinting to open a new word document actually I have many thoughts#the eye of the storm au
61 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#okay but reading this Belloc essay on Austen really made something click in my mind#and it’s because of something he said#which is that women care more about what men think of them generally#(as a general rule. not all the time. etc.)#and men care more about the opinion of the one woman they care about#like women do care (as a first instinct at least) what every man she meets thinks of her#but men are mostly indifferent. until they’re NOT.#which makes women more vulnerable to a greater number of people#but men are MORE painfully vulnerable to the woman whose opinion they care about#and I don’t actually know that that vulnerability only extends to a woman they are attracted to/feel romantic feelings for#I think if they just think well of you as a person you (a woman) have a lot of power over them#which is sooooo interesting and makes so much sense!!!! and is something I’ve sort of been dancing around with teaching#like. a lot of the boys I teach come to care about what I think about them#which doesn’t mean they all have a crush on me. though that step can be super easy and super small#hence the need for the boundaries of steel etc. but it does mean that they care what I think about them!#and I’ve always felt that instinctively and felt that I had to be so gentle with them because the power to crush them is mine if I so choose#don’t let me overstate it. it doesn’t happen all the time or anything close to it. but the thing about me being a teacher is that#they are forced to know me not just in a surface-level way. simply because I spend so much time with them#and talk to them a lot!#ANYWAY. enough about me but yeah this hit me so hard and of course exceptions exist#and/or endless variations on this exist because people are unique and surprising and also everything is changing all the time#etc. etc. but there is something to this I think! and you know what#it’s so interesting because that base-level instinct for women (allowing it to be a thing I mean) can be grown out of#I have trained myself out of/maturity has helped me leave behind that immediate female instinct#of being hurt at the idea that this random waiter (for example) is indifferent towards me. I���ve come to accept it#the instinct is still there!!! because imo women are always scanning and searching and sizing up. and also we are so open to being won over#if that makes sense? which is why insta comments complaining about how only good looking men get away with things like. PLEASE.#there are so many medium-ugly men who get married. it’s the average because the average woman is prettier than the average man#(this is not an insult) women CAN be and usually are so open to being surprised. won over. moved by the simple fact that a guy likes them#and men are not like that. but my point is: men don’t grow out of caring if they care. when they care they care sooooooo much. anyways yeah
11 notes
·
View notes
Note
Ure art is so gorgeous. How come u don't post more?
bcs i may not be well
#my dearest blorbos are the ones i think have kiIIed someone#ive posted this b4 and i dont like it bcs i think it is ugly (i made it ugly on purpose bcs isiah is scary And ugly 2 Me)#but im p sure i didnt tag it and i am lazy so here it is again as an Example of why i murmur my mumblings to myself#so much fic and art will never see the lighr of day#not bcs it's all unwell tho sometimes i just am idk#srry anon 😭#this is why i dont consider myself an artist/writer bcs it's rlly just watever i felt was palpable enough 4 the public#but easy enough for me to just kinda make and move on (not spend like 4 hours coloring n shading#beta readers etc)#i am but a simple sponge.. sometimes#anyways yes isiah is an scp Can U Get the Dog please I Know How to GET there#can you get the JOY i can i - Can you get The Joy#creature#to Me#and no i wont explain why#him replying to my tweets when i misspelled his name in it didnt help prove him innocent
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
I really hate how my physical body looks so so so much. unfortunately there isn't much I can do about it.
#ive got fat genetics from both parents families going back generations and ive been trying to lose weight forever#my stupod body likes being fat i can excercise like crazy and eat barely anything and i wont lose anything#i was excercising 2+ hours a day before i got sick and it made me stronger but i.stayed fat. now that im sick im weak and still fat.#and im not the kind of fat anybody can find pretty. if i could somehow not be fat id be decent to look at my face isnt bad#my skin is bad though my skin sucks#in my eyes im disgusting#and its so messed up because i dont think other fat people are gross#but i hate how i look so much that i cant imagine anyone being okay with it#like no matter how kind and understanding and sweet i am to people its never gonna make up for the fact that my body is grossly ugly#and i cant blame anyone for not liking me i get it.#sorry#this is a problem i have#bacause i just usually pretend my body doesnt exist and i wear pretty loose fitting dresses that cover me completely so but#even though i am what i am#sometimes you happen to meet a nice person and they are polite and dont seem disgusted by your existance so then your traitorous brain t#thinks hey maybe this person would be willing to marry us someday if they got to know us. which is so silly becuz theres no way thatd ever#so it makes me sad when i should be happy that a nice person talked to me. yay good job successful friendlyness. but it has to remind me#that i had this expectation from when i was a kid that id marry somone and have at least 3 kids and love my kids and take care of them and#give them everything i needed when i was a kid. and of course that never happened. because i never dated anyone. because people dont just#magically get married out of nowhere. its stupid. so i keep trying to be okay with whatever. but i guess i never stopped wanting a family.#which we know im aroace now so. i need to stop. but my brain is always bothering me about this.#why can't i just accept that no one will ever love me. why cant i be happy that they dont?#ive got cats#someday i will have irl friends again#sorry i think everything would be so much easier if i was just#this isnt a problem with an easy solutiom#i guess im gonna try to do the useless excercises again because at least it will look like im trying even though nothing will change
5 notes
·
View notes
Photo
doodle to get back into drawing
#been a few weeks since ive drawn something#heres some fairy elf person idk idk#pixie maybe who knows#also i think its kinda funny i have a few doodles v similar to this one but are much older and in my#old ass ugly style lol#anyways i love drawing hair like this its saur much fun and really relaxing#its just v messy and swirly and swoopy and fun#anyways u can tell this was a v idk easy doodle cause like i didnt bother to try to draw the other eye#flowers over the eyes oldest trick in th ebook#maybe ill edit this on pixlr to make it look nicer but who knows#art#sketch#doodle#pencil doodle#pencil sketch
69 notes
·
View notes
Text
i need more books with romance plots to have the love interest be literally anything other than the most conventionally attractive person on the planet and im not even kidding. i will die badly if these needs are not met
#i KNOWWWW that doing that is like really easy shorthand to let readers know who the li is and to make readers like them#BUT !!!!!!!! if you're good enough at writing you can make a convincing romance with anyone. anyone at all#men do not need to be tall chiseled muscle gods. women dont have to be big boob'd goddesses#im begging on my hands and knees crying and throwing up#can we have a love interest whos like just some guy or maybe a lil ugly but the main character really likes them for other reasons#and so thru the process of being into them they find them attractive As They Are ???#huh? what happened to romantic chemistry?#love interest whos way too into lego sets and has funky teeth and has a shit haircut and w/e but the main character thinks theyre hot shit#can authors put in any amt of effort to endear us as readers to love interests that isnt making them a total babe or a total hunk#can i be endeared to an ugly weirdo please#whenever i write romances i always need the weirder less conventional one to be the love interest i cant write it otherwise#or else ill vomit my liver and kidneys out#anyway whatever#writeblr#bookblr
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
It is only first month of 2024, and I've already lost not one but two subjects of nightmares, paranoia and reoccurring emotional torture. I really wish there was another way to get rid of these besides having extremely painful conversations.. but at least these scars are closing, one by one
#/vent#personal#and this time was like.. opposite of the previous one#previous one absolutely wrecked me with very ugly insight and basically made all puzzle pieces fall together#this one was just pain and crying and having my worst suspicions about other person AND self faced and confirmed#but again it got solved#I really want the power to move on without having a closure.#I hope I will be strong enough for it one day.#I just need to think..#I think I really should avoid other depressed/traumatised people until something can be done with how I react at perceived threats#(which is eternity because hell I know when I will be able to afford therapy. probably never with how my life situation is going)#as jarring as being close only with 'healthy' people would be I just can't make things worse for both me and them#until I can change my default response from aggression into avoidance I'll just stay away from anyone with depression#I say very terrible things when I feel threatened and it is way too easy to make me feel threatened. it is THE easiest thing in the world.#I won't survive without close friends anyhow but there is category of people that can't recover from these words normally#I mean I am ALSO this 'category'. I also hurt from awful words thrown at me for MONTHS don't I#it is very hard to be aware of my glaring flaws when everyone that points them out is outright malicious and wants me bullied off the Earth#and then everyone who does think I deserve my human rights either doesn't see my flaws or doesn't mention them#so at least discussing it without outright intention to harm me was helpful for a change#maybe one day I'll have a friend that can be open if I've hurt them a lot so I can work on it but that's another story I guess
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
it’s me & my faggoty ass scrunchie against the world
#stream#it’s so fun but it looks so bad but idc#it’s. like a bucket hat#it’s ugly & looks unbecoming on everyone & that’s the point. universality#i got them both from the same brand lucky & yak#i also got the black chord tote & that’s what was my main bag for this trip to spain like i had so much shit in that & she HELD#STRONG#RECOMMEND#it’s got 2 internal pockets then 1 internal zip pocket & it’s all a lined w canvas but the bag structure is the chord so she can hold a good#weight !! i needed a bag like this sooo bad like totes are great love a plain cheap tote but i need A Heavy Duty#i’ve one bookmarked leather tote but it’s unaffordable rn#like i’ve alert my leather purse i got last year that still needs more use#if i didn’t drunkenly get the jacket & the document holder MAYBE ? but no i didn’t lol#i still haven’t worn the coat#honestly if i move to china id be able to wear it bc all id use is alipay & wechat lol#like i just got shit to carry !!!#idk how to style this leather coat more casually bc they didn’t / refused to put the front pocket w/o a zipper or make it a single front#pocket which made no sense anyway like what i’m asking u to Do Less Work#i wouldn’t get from them again#LESSONS LEARNED REGARDLESS#i just didn’t think i’d have had time to get them elsewhere & this guy was recommended#i like the document holder tho i use that for all my important shit#it is ACTIVELY used#like i’m literally going to have it until i die it’s fine & i never need another#but the jacket …. yes still will have just not as much use until it gets damaged from eventual wear#i love love love damage like i was going to wear a white shirt that i stain on purpose to get this tattoo so it could bleed in a fun pattern#onto the shirt but then they were like can u cons back in 1.5hr & i was like yea lol so i went home & showered & didn’t but it didn’t bleed#much at all like it’s going to be such an easy heal#+ if it blows out it’ll be so fuckig funny bc it’s the ….. od price lol#a BLOW OUT IT WAS …
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
Fighting Art Block Pt 1
#fire emblem lukas#lukas fire emblem#fe lukas#a sacrifice to the gods#oc artwork#sov lukas#just lukas TM and a bunch of ocs#still tagging it with my novel's working title so people can see all the art of the characters in one search#no i didn't forget koray's scar#he just doesn't have it yet in this instance#tahire is growing on me so much#she's come so far since i first thought up the idea for this story#if anyone reads these tags... can you tell that eirian has a hooked nose?#i wanted that to be one of ther design traits... but her hair kinda goes over her nose#i hope her nose at least look prominent#lukas' art looks a bit different because i was playing around with the idea of making an easy doodle drawing style#so i drew lukas and then proceeded to not use the drawing style anymore#i think the problem was just i was in an art block so everything looked ugly to me#but it's fine#lukas looks cute here so im good
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
oh fuck lovebomb started playing and it set off my fight or flight instincts
#my post#i hear that opening Wom Wom Wom Wom and sit up straight in a cold sweat#i still hear it in my dreams sometimes#i captain chip do solemnly swear to fuck shit up to help those in need and to be the best goddamn pirates anyone has ever seen we need to#get these pirates inside now did we ever get a name for what theyre called the riptide pirates BAAANANANANANANANNANANANANAA hey guys check#this out YES whos laughing now fuckers fuck you ok if anyone can clear the gauntlet its the riptide pirates get to the center of the prison#thats your out we need to hget him out of here is he even still alive its worth a shot BLOW YOU AWAY gillion youre not actually the chosen#one chip i think youre irresponsible and incompetent and honestly youre a danger to everyone around you chip arlins probably dead and you#need to move on and live for yourself and your own destiny jay i think youre ugly and no one will ever love you gillion i think this place#is playing more than one trick on us its not us chip its this place stay back dont make me do this do what you have to hey there little nei#wait a fucking minute wait drey who put you in here it wasnt one of hey brother you have a lot of explaining to do but come and maybe ill#let them go and what if i dont come with you youd rather be a pirate then i will show you what youre up against you wanna take on a pirate#im right here stop please just stop if i come with you will you let them leave we swore an oath chip its gonna be okay discipline them jay#you wanna know my secret so bad chip i convinced the navy to let me go undercover i was just using you i dont care what you were before thi#youre a riptide pirate now what do you really want jay and just say it so i can fight for it i wanna keep adventuring with you guys gill#thats all i want right now jay because you are my duaghter i will give yoy a headstart but when i catch you you will no longer be a daughte#to me just another piratee BAAAHHH gill youre not going down that easy buddy were not leaving you behindAUAGDSHGH jay my anme is jay ferin#co captain of the riptide pirates im gonna trust my friends were gonna fuck shit up im gonna be the best goddamn pirate youve ever seen#i dont doubt it sureshot
1 note
·
View note
Text
I hate the design of minecraft villagers
they're huge-nosed, money hungry, ugly, primitive, golem-making explicitely-non-human humanoids. unless of course they're the evil dark-magic practicing main villains of the universe (who are also huge-nosed ugly non-human humanoids). And people still deny how antisemetic the designs are, despite the fact that Villagers were designed by Notch, also known as Markus "Q is legit. Don't trust the media" Persson.
So! I decided to fixit.
I could just make them humans, but I'd prefer keeping to canon and having players be the only humans. So, let's make them anthro animals like Piglins!
I think sheep is the best animal, as they can be docile symbols of peace like Villagers, or aggressive headbutting gremlins like Illagers. The lore of villagers and illagers shown in MC Legends is basically that they both blindly worship humans, right? Might as well make them literal sheeple!
(Yeah, turns out it's ridiculously easy to make a resource pack that replaces models.)
Introducing: Lamblets & Ramlets!
The two species differentiated by the Ramlets having horns, while the Lamblets do not. However, that might not always be enough to differentiate them at a glance. Not as easily as you can with the vanilla beige vs gray skin. Therefore, there's four versions of the pack, to suit your preference of what type of balance you want between gameplay and variety.
Simplicity The most similar to vanilla - Lamblets have beige skin and white wool, while Ramlets have gray skin and dark gray wool.
Variety Lamblets have beige skin and Ramlets have gray skin. Both have one of 6 random wool colors - white, gray, dark gray, black, brown, and rarely, pink.
Diversity Lamblets have random wool and one of 4 random skin tones - beige, white, gray, and black. Ramlets have random wool, but always gray skin.
Canonicity Both Lamblets and Ramlets have both random skin and random wool.
You can find Lamblets & Ramlets on Modrinth!
REQUIRES EITHER OPTIFINE OR ENTITY MODEL FEATURES AND ENTITY TEXTURE FEATURES !!!
9K notes
·
View notes