#i think i was just gonna say i think it wouldn't be very fruitful TO consider it. consdiering im a bit impaired atm
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wildfire (cs) | 7.5
—spotify playlist | series masterlist
—summary: assistant professor in bioengineering, incredibly attractive, lonely and divorced; that’s how most people describe san. but despite the events that have happened in his life, san has a lot going for himself. he’s a successful, sought out professor due to his brilliant contributions to science at just an early age of 32. he worked hard to get where he was now; head deep into his research, his publications, building his lab and creating a name for himself. everything was good and smooth sailing— until it wasn’t. because when he meets you, a bioengineering grad student interested in rotating in his lab, he finds himself ready to risk all the blood, sweat and tears he put in throughout the years just to keep you close— his need for you spiraling out of control like a wildfire.
—pairing: asst. professor!choi san x grad student!f. reader
—genre: (18+ - minors dni) strangers to lovers, grad school au | fluff, angst, smut
—word count: 1.2k
—chapter content/warnings: not much here!!, cussing, mature language/sexually implied content, subtle flirting (in san's and oc's terms lmfao)
—a/n: hi! just a friendly lil reminder that these half chapters are random scenes/bits that couldn't really fit into a chapter or stand-alone as one. they're mostly in the past and will not always follow the exact timeline of the previous or upcoming chapter!
San booked off most of his day to help Christopher with this symposium. Well, actually, most of the group has [minus a select few others] in order to make room for the quick tech rehearsal and run through before its official start time in the next half hour or so. The staff is now bringing in the fruit, cheese and other pastries, along with coffee, tea and juice— setting them outside of the conference room on a long table. The symposium is supposed to be 5 hours, being that everyone keeps to their 20-min presentation + 10-min Q&A times. San is off to the side speaking with Jongho and Chris, while Mingi and Zara are fiddling with the AV system to test their own presentations for the final time. Even though this is the one time most of their schedules worked, Yeosang had to skip out due to heading overseas for a conference. As San sips on his coffee, Yunho and Iseul walk in alongside of Namjoon. Per usual, he keeps greetings to a bare minimum:
AKA, a very subtle smile and nod to both. One that Yunho reciprocates, one that Iseul doesn't like to acknowledge.
But, whatever.
"Did you guys tell your labs about this?" Chris nervously wipes his hands on his dress pants, nervous about how his first symposium is gonna turn out.
"Dude." Jongho laughs and pokes fun at him. "Relax."
"I bragged about it way too much, I don't even know if people wanna come anymore." San teases, making Chris shake him by the shoulders. "Relax! They'll come!"
"What if no one shows up? We'll be giving presentations to each other—" Chris laughs, but a few people start trickling into the conference room; providing him with a sense of relief. "Oh, thank god." The three start giving small nods to the students and other faculty dipping in, greeting them just as they set their things down and grab some food.
"Can't believe you actually thought people wouldn't come. Think you might need extra chairs." San points out as more people flood in.
"Shit, I did it." Chris beams from ear to ear, shifting his attention to two more familiar faces. "Oh! Hey Y/N, Jiung!" He says as the two of you walk towards their group, giving them very curt bows.
"Hi." You smile at all, especially San. He bites onto his straw, trying his hardest to hold back his smile.
"Thanks for coming."
"Of course! Got a good lineup, excited to hear all the presentations!" Jiung tugs on his backpack straps.
"In that case, send me a full report on it tomorrow." Jongho jokes, making Jiung playfully roll his eyes.
"Do you see how he treats me?" Chris and Jongho laugh.
"Nah, he's been talking a lot about the work you've been doing and how you're probably the best person to help get the rig together for our optical electrophysiology project."
"Aw, really?" Jiung looks at Jongho. "You mean it?" Jiung has stars in his eyes and Jongho can't help but deny the allegations. He has said it time and time again; Jiung is definitely doing great work and Jongho doesn't want him to go anywhere. If he could keep him for good, he would. He hopes he can.
He'd just never say it out loud cause he's like that.
"Hey now." He shakes his head. "I never said anything, I don't know what he's talking about."
"We have a few minutes actually, let's talk about that real quick and follow up in another meeting later on." Chris looks at you. "Sorry to have to pull him away from you, Y/N. Professor Choi #2 can keep you company?"
"All good."
"Be back." Jiung looks at you. "I'll save us those chairs." He points towards two end spots near the middle section. You awkwardly watch as Chris, Jongho and Jiung approach another professor to talk about said project, leaving you with San.
"Hi." He says shyly. You've never seen him this way, and he's too fucking cute, too fucking charming. It makes you replay the dinner events in your head, only pushing your curiosity of what he'd be like if you two were completely alone.
"Hi. Is that your nervous face poking out? Are you nervous?" You tease a bit.
"Me?" He playfully scoffs. "No. Dinner was more nerve-racking than this."
"What, why?" You giggle.
"Because it's you. I have to be extra careful with you, remember?"
"Right." You tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, heat rising to your cheeks as your eyes glaze over his figure; he's dressed nicely in a white button up, tie and grey vest. They're all dressed nicely for the occasion, but it's definitely an extra weakness for you seeing San like this.
"You're cute." He mutters as he bites his straw again and takes a sip of his iced coffee, eyes looking around the room to make his flirting not so obvious. And it isn't, except Yunho has been watching from the side while he waits for Iseul to finish up working through some presentation issues with IT. He didn't mean to, but his eyes gradually glazed over to the two of you smiling and laughing.
He can't help it, but the interaction feels different. The only time he's ever seen San that shy and flustered is when he was courting Iseul. It almost feels like he's watching something unfold all over again.
"All good!" Iseul says, knitting her brows together when Yunho seems to be preoccupied. "You okay?" She asks, Yunho finally returning his attention to her.
"Yeah, sorry. Was just people-watching." Iseul looks over, eyes also falling on San but she doesn't necessarily get a chance to think much about it before Yunho is chiming in again. "Let's go grab some food before it starts." He laces his hand with hers and leads her to the end, front row seats.
Meanwhile, you've been too busy keeping your attention on San to care about everyone else. You're so tempted to nudge him, be a little affectionate with him. And it's taking everything in you to remind yourself who you are and where you are at.
"Stop it."
"Glad you actually made it, though."
"I told you I'd come."
"And I'm glad it wasn't just something you said to brush me off in the hallway." You laugh.
"No, never." Jiung wraps up his talk with the other professors, his eyes meeting yours with a small nod towards the seats he sat his bag down at. "Well, guess they're done. I'll see you later? Goodluck on your talk, Professor Choi." He smiles toothlessly at you.
"Thank you, Y/N." He watches as you walk off and meet Jiung, plopping down onto the seat as he debriefs you on his impromptu meeting.
"Hm." Jongho hums and clears his throat, slowly walking over to his bestfriend while sipping his coffee.
"Yes?"
"Nothing." Jongho squints his eyes at him, a small chuckle leaving his lips. "Productive conversations going around, I see."
"Mhm." San chuckles, knowing exactly what Jongho's hinting at.
"Hey!" Zara comes over with a bright smile on her face. "We saved you some seats." She points at the front row on the left side, waving them over. "Come."
"Sweet, thanks." Jongho leads the way while Zara tucks her hair behind her ear and walks alongside of San.
"Ready?" San shrugs as he looks at her.
"As can be."
"I'm sure it'll be great like always." He smiles.
"Thanks." He lets her slip into the seat next to Jongho before sliding into the end seat, eyes quickly glancing over at you before he gets situated and switches modes for the symposium.
Though, you are incredibly distracting, and he can only hope he can get you alone sometime soon just to show you exactly how he feels.
—taglist: @asjkdk @interweab @woojirang @svintsandghosts @cheolliehugs @persphonesorchid @mxnsxngie @jycas @cowboydk @vcutparis @chngbnwf @struggling101 @sanhwalvr @angelqueendom @barbielibra @brown88 @choisansplushie @yunhoswrldddd @hyukssunflower @vickykazuya @lucid-galaxys-world @jaytheatiny @pommelex @thespiffynerd @vixensss @santineez @nopension @domfikeluva @in-somnias-world @my-atiny-kookie-rkive @mountiiny
#san fanfic#san series#choi san series#choi san fanfic#san#ateez#choi san#san x reader#choi san x reader#ateez fanfic#kpop imagines#kpop#san x y/n#choi san x y/n#san angst#san fluff#san smut#choi san smut#choi san fluff#choi san angst#hwaslayer: wildfire
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Please, Please, Please, Let Me Get What I Want | Part 3. (Rivals Declan O'Hara x Reader 18+)
Part 1. Part 2. Warnings: profanities, consumption of alcohol and cigarette use. hints of sex! age gap (reader!22) enjoy!
━━━━━━☆━━━━━━
You're at your desk when you hear the news, the entire office in commotion as Cameron, Tony and Declan appear after the wrap of Declan's newest episode.
"Rupert said yes?" You gasp, smacking Seb's arm. "Fucking brilliant, man." You say, grinning. "Declan's gonna take a chunk out of his neck, it's gonna be grand." You look over at Declan, who's clinking glasses with Tony in his office.
"I'm just grateful our efforts aren't going to waste. Christ knows how much time we put into this sleazy bastard." Seb grumbles, crossing his arms.
"Why you look so down on yourself Seb?" You ask, standing up straight from your previous position of leaning against the oak desk.
"I don't know, y/n. Maybe you can figure that out yourself." He says bluntly, walking away towards the common space.
Your jaw drops slightly, throwing your arms up. "What the fuck?" You whisper to yourself, grabbing the back of your neck. You had been turning down Seb's advances on you due to your clandestine actions with Declan, not realizing how much of an impact it really had on the ginger. You knew he liked you a little more than just friends, you just hoped he'd let go of it sooner than later.
As far as you were concerned, still no one knew about you and Declan. You tried to stay focused on your work and not overthink it much, although it was on your mind every minute of your waking hours. Not telling anyone, especially your new best friend Taggie, was taking a toll on you. How does one tell another that they find their dad very attractive, and also have been banging him in his office after hours? It wasn't an easy feat for anyone. You tried to remind yourself that it was okay to have a little fun, as long as no one else knew about it.
You jump slightly as you notice Declan standing by your desk, straightening out your blazer as you nod towards him. "Declan, hi. Congratulations on securing the interview with Rupert." You say, giving him a smile.
"Thanks, y/n. You've been a great help with it all, I wouldn't be as confident as I am without you." He says, a smirk growing on his face. "Would you mind doing overtime on Saturday? To help me with additional flawed research?" He asks, now properly smiling.
"Ah, I would, but your daughter has asked me to accompany her in catering for Baddingham's falconery that day. I'm sorry." You admit, shrugging.
"That's alright. Will you be coming to our home for dinner afterwards, then?" He asks.
You grin, tapping your chin in thought satirically. "Yeah, I guess so." You say, letting out a small laugh.
"Great, see you then." He says, a light tap on your bottom as he walks away.
You gasp lightly, looking around hastily to ensure no one saw. "Unbelievable." You whisper to yourself, sitting down at your desk.
-
As Saturday rolls around, you find yourself bright and early at The Priory, attempting to hold back your yawns as you prepare cheese and fruit platters with Taggie.
"Can I ask you something?" Taggie asks, rinsing a bowl of grapes.
"Course, yeah. What's up?" You say, slicing wedges of brie.
"Do you think my dad should go through with interviewing Rupert?" She inquires timidly, putting the bowl of grapes on the kitchen table.
"Rupert is an asshole. He deserves anything that is thrown at him." You say bitterly out of respect for your friend, and her father.
"Y/n, I don't think he should go through with it." Taggie says, meeting your eyes. "I'm afraid my father will ruin him." She whispers, frowning.
"Taggie," You start, putting a hand on her shoulder. "Where is this coming from?" You ask, worried about her concerns.
"I think Rupert isn't as horrible as everyone thinks he is. He sincerely apologized to me, and I can tell he wasn't just doing it out of spite for me or my father." She explains, sighing. "After you left before the party ended, we slow danced together and..." She trails off, seeming upset with herself. "We shouldn't've, I know. But there's something about him that isn't worth destroying him over." She finishes.
You furrow your brows and purse your lips. "I'm not the one to call the shots on this, Tags. You know that." You say.
"My father listens to you better than me, for some reason." She says, causing your breath to go still. "I don't know why, but I would like for you to try saying something." She pleas. "For me, y/n. Please."
You let out a deep sigh, letting go of your breath. "Fine, I will. Don't get mad if he goes through with it, though." You mumble, reorganizing the assembly of cheeses.
"Thank you." Taggie smiles, giving you a side hug.
"Course." You whisper, it was the least you could do considering what secrets you've withheld from her already.
"Taggie!" Declan yells, entering the kitchen. He is taken aback by our presence, perhaps not expecting you so early in the morning. "Y/n, hello." He smiles. "Have you seen my plaid shirt your mum put out to dry?" He asks his daughter.
"I folded it up in your dresser, dad." Taggie says, causing Declan to nod.
"Right, course. Thank you darling." He places a kiss on her head, secretly gliding his fingers across your lower back as he steps away. "See you girls later." He says, waving as he exits the kitchen.
"Why'd you look at my dad like that?" She queries, nudging you.
"Like what?" You say defensively.
"Like he was a piece of meat." She says, scoffing.
"Your dad's hot, that's not my fault. It's not like I'm doing anything." You exclaim, raising your hands.
"Good, you better not." She says jokingly, grinning at the banter between the two of you.
You laugh, trying to not frown at your inner thoughts.
Only if you knew, Taggie. Only if.
-
Declan is in the office, going through evidence against Rupert as he notices Charles Fairburn reorganizing his office. "Charles!" He says out of surprise.
"Oh, hello." Charles says. "I didn't expect to see anybody."
"I'm researching Campbell-Black and needed something from my office." He says, approaching Fairburn.
"I never thought I'd see the day when Tony Baddingham had Declan O'Hara doing his dirty work." The road of Baddingham's distaste for Campbell-Black is a long one, and quite complicated enough even for you to even know about.
"I have my own reasons for wanting to take that bastard down." Declan interjects.
"You know, in different circumstances, you and Rupert could've been friends." Charles says simply. "Both complicated, both stubborn, misunderstood." He jests, putting down office supplies on his new desk.
"Bollocks." Declan states. "What are you doing in on a Saturday?" He queries.
Charles clicks his tongue, "Moving offices ahead of my grand return." He says, now holding a clipboard. "Apparently, my recent coronary episode makes me a medical liability." He says, referring to the panic attack that happened on New Years. "Which is why Cameron Cook is now controller of programmes and I'm--"
"Head of Religious Broadcasting." Declan says, reading the new plaque on the door underneath Charles' name. He looks back and gives him a look of sympathy.
Charles scoffs. "I can't begrudge her too much. Climbing the greasy pole requires its own set of skills." He mumbles, sitting down. "Especially when the greasy pole in question, lives in Tony Baddingham's trousers." He says sarcastically. A moment of silence passes by.
"How's the heart?" Declan asks, redirecting the conversation.
Charles sighs. "Oh, you know, broken." He goes quiet for a moment. "How's the new journalist, Declan?" He asks, watching as Declan's face contorts into bewilderment.
"What'd you mean by that?" He asks, attempting to act confused by Fairburn's statement. Heat rose to his face as his heart began to race.
Charles gives him a weak smile before speaking again. "I'm sorry for what I saw at the New Year's Eve party. I was out in the garden and wasn't expecting to see you, especially with y/n." He says quietly, Declan staying dead silent. Fuck.
"I'm not telling anyone." Charles adds, seeing the worry in O'Hara's face. "Don't show Tony any weakness, Declan." He abruptly says. "Or this is what you get." He whispers sadly, referring to his new demoted office space.
Declan looks down for a moment, unable to find words as he slowly walks away. He looks back again at Charles Fairburn before he returns to his office, closing the door and running a hand through his dark curls.
Charles knew of Declan's dirty secret, but regardless of what assurance he is given, he has to keep it completely under wraps now. He has to be careful, and so do you.
He notices a folder on his desk, opening it to reveal a note from the sender mentioning of a phone call regarding Rupert Campbell-Black accompanied by a photo. He grins, his worries dissipating as more evidence has landed in his lap. He folds it up tightly, enclosing it in a new envelope with a devilish grin.
-
You find yourself back at The Priory with Taggie later that afternoon, your stomach unwell from seeing all the dead birds that day.
"God, it's astounding how they manage to eat and drink so much while killing those innocent creatures." You say, taking a leftover ham sandwich and taking a bite out of it.
Declan enters the house, returning after his time at the office. "Ah, how was the shoot?"
"Well, they killed loads of birds," You say, swallowing your food.
"But they liked my food." Taggie finishes the sentence for you. Declan chuckles. "Rupert stopped by." She adds, crossing her arms.
You watch in bemusement as Declan reacts poorly. You take another bite of your sandwich.
"Oh, Jesus Christ. Is there no place free of that man?" He exclaims, walking away.
Taggie furrows her brows, looking over at you to do something.
You sigh, taking the last bite of your sandwich as you follow her father into the other room. "I'll talk to him." You mumble to Taggie as you pass her.
After quickening your pace, you follow him into the master bedroom, where he begins unloading his blazer. "You shouldn't be so harsh on Rupert, y'know." You begin to say, closing the door behind you.
"And what makes you think you have any say in that?" Declan replies with an edge in his voice, putting a cigarette in his mouth and lighting it.
"Taggie's forgiven him, I think you can let it go-"
"Let it go?! Let go of the fact that he groped my daughter? That my own wife still wants to sleep with him even though he's a horrible fucking bastard?!" Declan yells, aggressively huffing on his cigarette.
"Look, I understand where you're coming from Declan, but this could backfire and then what happens to you, huh? What if he ends up burying you into the ground instead of the other way around?!" You try to explain, holding your place as Declan begins to undo his shirt, tossing it onto the bed. You stare at his torso as he breathes heavily in anger, his chest rising and falling. Time and place, time and place.
"He will not do any such thing." Declan mutters harshly, putting out his cigarette in the ashtray atop his dresser. "You know that Charles Fairburn knows of us, huh?" He says, leaning against a bed post.
Your eyes widen, taken aback by his statement. "What? How?" You ask meekly, guilt mixed with fear rising up your throat from the pit of your stomach. "But no one saw us?" You whisper, beginning to pace back forth.
"Well he did." Declan states flatly. He grabs your arm and halts your movements. "He said he won't tell a soul, but this means we have to keep it controlled or this can no longer happen, y/n." He whispers firmly, staring into your eyes.
"I think I'd rather quit than stop whatever this is." You mumble, turning yourself completely towards Declan.
The two of you stare deeply at one another, Declan placing a hand on your cheek. "I need to control myself." He whispers, leaning in close enough to have his lips hover over yours.
"No one can see us now, Declan." You remind him.
-
The two of you come undone in multiple positions. You find yourself cuddled up beside Declan as he lights a cigarette, inhaling as he strokes your hair.
"Thanks for that, I needed a good fuck." You joke, closing your eyes as Declan hums.
"My pleasure." He grins, inhaling his cigarette once again.
"Wait, shit." You say, sitting up abruptly. Declan looks at you with confusion. "Taggie is still here, she must be concerned why it's taking so long." You say worriedly, getting out of the bed and retrieving your clothes.
Declan watches you with a smirk, his eyes trailing over your exposed body as you shimmy your underwear and jeans back on, following with your shirt.
You run over to Declan's side of the bed, pressing a firm kiss on his lips. "I'll see you for dinner, Mister O'Hara." You tease, smoothening your hair as you exit the grand master bedroom. He simply laughs, inhaling his cigarette.
You hurry down the hall, slowing down your pace as you look for Taggie.
"Tags?" You yell, eventually stumbling across Declan's study.
She had opened his file of evidence against Rupert, abruptly closing it when she hears you approach. "I-I was just looking through it, I'm sorry. Please don't tell my father." She says hastily, getting up from the desk chair.
"Taggie, relax. It's okay." You say, hoping nothing about your appearance gives away what you had been doing for the past half an hour. "I tried convincing him, I really did. He wouldn't budge, Tags." You admit, sighing. "Maybe you can warn Rupert, I don't know. I think your dad has more dirt on him than we know." You warn, running a hand through your hair.
"Maybe I should talk to him, then." Taggie says, beginning to walk past you.
"No-!" You say, grabbing her arm. She looks at you with confusion. "He seems exhausted, I think he needs to be left alone to be completely honest." You say, hoping Taggie would drop the whole thing for today.
"Alright, then." She says, your grasp loosening on her arm. "I'm gonna start making dinner, then. Care to help?" She asks, walking slowly out of the study.
"Always." You say with a smile, following Taggie out the door.
-
As the evening rolled around, you found yourself around the dining table with Taggie to your left, Maud and Caitlin on the other side as Declan sat at the head of the table.
"This food is incredible, Tag." Maud muses, taking another bite of the dish.
"It's y/n's recipe, actually." Taggie admits, smiling at you.
"Oh, y/n. Lovely job, then." Maud says, sending a smile towards you.
"Thanks Maud. It's my mom's favorite dish. I ate it a lot growing up." You say, taking a sip of wine.
"Hmm, American culture doesn't taste as bland as I thought, then." She remarks, taking another bite.
"Be nice, Maud." Declan warns, glaring at his wife.
"Actually, my mom's from Greece. It's Mediterranean, not American." You correct her, trying to hide a shit-faced grin behind your glass of wine.
Caitlin stifles a laugh, earning a light kick of the shin from Taggie.
"Sorry, I didn't mean to offend you." Maud apologizes, clearly embarrassed.
"No, it's okay. I agree, American food is god awful." You assure her, taking a bite of your meal.
"So, what's this big interview you've announced on live television about?" Maud says, looking over at Declan.
"Ah, I'm interviewing Rupert on Valentine's Day." He says casually, wiping his mouth with a napkin.
"That's it?" Maud persists, raising a brow.
"He wants to take him down, mum." Taggie interjects, Declan scoffing at the statement.
"I'm not doing anything that he doesn't deserve." He emphasizes, taking a sip of his glass.
"Declan, don't you think you're taking this a bit too far? They're calling you the Corinium Butcher, for god's sake." Maud exasperates, putting down her cutlery.
"I am doing the interview the way I want to and that is that!" He states firmly. "Now, can you all get off my arse about it and enjoy this lovely meal y/n and Taggie put together? Christ." He exclaims, picking up his fork and taking another bite out of his dish.
Everyone goes quiet, returning to their meals.
You feel a bit cold in the room, the peaks of your breasts hardening as you realize something dire-- you've left your bra in their bedroom.
You clear your throat, standing up. "I have to use the restroom, if you'll excuse me." You say, hurriedly exiting the room.
You make your way down the hall from the foyer towards the master bedroom, slowly opening the door and flicking on the overhead light as you scan the room hastily for your bra.
You get down on your knees, looking underneath the bed on the opposite side from the door. You see it just within arms reach, stretching your arm out as the door opens.
"What are you doing?" Maud says, causing you to smack your forehead against the bedframe, unable to grab ahold of your bra as you stand up hastily.
"I uh, Taggie was giving me a tour earlier and I thought I lost my ring in here. I was just trying to find it because I realized I lost it when I was going to the washroom." You lie out of your ass, smiling oddly at a very confused Maud.
"Oh, what does it look like?" She asks, not realizing this ring did not exist whatsoever.
"It's small, really small. Honestly it was super cheap it's not that big of a deal!" You force out, making your way towards the door. "Let me know if you find it though, it was from my mom." You laugh awkwardly. "I'm going to the washroom now."
You hastily exit the bedroom, leaving Maud behind as you run into the nearby washroom and close the door behind you. You panic as you stare at yourself in the mirror, whispering profanities to yourself. You wash your hands as if you had dirtied them with your actions, almost afraid to return to the table.
You take a deep breath and open the door, walking back out to the dining table as you practice breathing normally.
Maud had already returned to eating her meal, seeming disinterested in your bizarre behaviors from before.
"Is everything alright?" Declan asks you, referring to your tense aura now present in conversation.
"Yes, everything's fine." You say, taking a sip of your wine.
"Y/n was trying to find a ring she lost earlier in the master bedroom, maybe you can keep an eye out for it too." Maud says nonchalantly to Declan, whose face drops at the mention of you being in their bedroom.
"Is that so?" He asks, coughing slightly as he tries to swallow his food down. "That's a shame. I'll keep it in mind then."
You watch as Maud gives him a puzzled look, her eyes squinting at her husband with suspicion.
"Would anyone like dessert?" Taggie asks, standing up.
"Me!" You say abruptly, also getting up. "Let me help you with that!" You offer, following Taggie into the kitchen.
She suddenly stops right by the kitchen island, causing you to bump into her. "Something's going on with you y/n. You've been acting weird all day. Is everything alright?" Taggie asks, a look of concern upon her face as she grabs ahold of your hands.
"Sorry, I'm just stressed out about the whole Rupert ordeal." It wasn't a complete lie, ever since you landed this internship you've felt like putting your head in a door way and slamming the door repeatedly on it. You couldn't imagine how many grudges these Lords hold against each other, it would've been disputed in an instant if you were back at home.
"I shouldn't have brought it up, I'm sorry." Taggie says, sighing. "I tried getting Rupert to step down earlier at the falconery, but he wouldn't listen. He's convinced my father doesn't have the capability to take him down." She whispers, afraid of her father overhearing the two of you.
You quickly glance into the next room where Declan was speaking to Caitlin, Maud seeming very displeased in the middle. "I don't know if we have any more options, Tags. I think we have to let them go at it." You say remorsefully, looking back at her.
"I'm not giving up just yet." She says firmly, picking up a platter of desserts as you shake your head, bringing out another bottle of wine to share.
-
It was now Friday, February 14th. You and Seb were in mid conversation when Cameron Cook comes barreling down the office floor, yelling about needing coffee.
"You'd think the promotion would make her happy, but she's angrier than ever." You say, closing your folder. Your desk phone starts to ring.
"I'll get the coffee, you get the phone." Seb says, walking around from your shared cubicle.
"Hello, y/n y/l/n speaking." You say.
"Look, I'm going to make this very clear y/n." Maud says on the other line. "I know that you are seeing my husband." She says, causing your eyes to nearly pop out of your skull.
You laugh breathlessly, looking around as you sit down, almost whispering into the phone. "What are you talking about?" You ask, your body beginning to sweat profusely.
Declan's wife has called you, at work, on the day of all god damn days, to confront you about your affairs.
"I found your bra underneath my bed when I was looking for something else." She says, almost sounding too calm for the circumstances she was speaking of. "I know I am one to talk, but I insist if you know any better, that you no longer see him. His work already keeps him away from our family, god forbid someone at The Corinium starts doing the same." She remarks, her tone never wavering.
Your jaw drops slightly, unable to find your words.
"Oh, and good luck tonight. Don't ruin my husband's career." She says, the line going dead.
You are left in dismay, slowly putting the phone back down on the hook. You look around your workspace once more in complete mortification.
"Oh god." You whisper to yourself, getting up to retrieve a cup of coffee to mask the fear building up inside. You couldn't fathom the audacity Maud O'Hara had to tell you to leave her husband be when she was trying to get with every other well-off man in the county.
All personal feelings aside, you knew you had to listen to her wishes in order to keep your job, and Declan's. It would be unfair to both parties if you kept this up.
You shakily pour the coffee pot into your mug, putting one cream and one sugar in after before stirring it with a spoon. You stare at the ground, unable to gather your thoughts up properly as Declan quickly walks past the kitchen with his focus on papers in his hands, taking a step back when he notices you standing idly.
"Y/n, what're doing just standing there?" He asks boastfully, causing you to jump and spill some coffee on your hand.
"Fuck," You whisper, wincing as you quickly run your hand under the cold tap.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you." Declan says, coming up beside you and placing his hand on yours. "Is your hand alright?"
You turn to face him, giving him a flat tone. "It's fine, thanks." You say, pulling away as you grab your coffee and step into the hallway. "I have work to do."
He grabs your arm. "What work? You've done it all already." He says, raising a brow. "Is everything alright?" He asks, his eyes full of concern.
"What? Haven't you heard the news?" You quip, staring at him with dread in your eyes. You hated yourself for developing feelings for Declan O'Hara. You were smarter than this, and to allow yourself to dig such an emotional hole was the last thing you needed for your brand-new career.
"Everything is fine, Mister O'Hara." You say, pulling your arm away from his grasp. His face drops when you refuse to use his first name. "Maybe you need to ask your wife the same question." You add bitterly, stepping away from him. His eyes widen at the mention of his wife.
"Elvis is about to enter the building." Seb says, him and Daysee both running down the hall past you two.
Declan looks you for a long, silent moment. "We'll discuss this later." He mutters, following them down the hall.
You close your eyes and sigh, walking away towards your desk.
-
You're now standing in the control room, biting your nails nervously as Daysee counts down Declan, now live broadcasting the interview. You exchange glances with Seb as Declan begins with mundane questions before hitting him with mildly offensive comments that will eventually snowball into something worse.
You cover your mouth as Declan brings up the topic of adultery, and how it must do Mr. Campbell-Black well for life within the Conservative Party.
"I'm sorry?" Rupert says with dismay.
"You know, sneaking around, lying, betrayal, sexual degeneracy." Declan lists nonchalantly, as if Rupert was born for such actions.
"Oh fuck." You mumble into your hand, Seb patting your shoulder with a sympathetic look.
"Remember, Declan's just doing his job." He reminds you.
"I'm no longer married." Rupert exclaims.
"Yeah, but you were, for six years! And yet throughout your marriage, your affairs were common knowledge." Declan states confidently, gesturing to the crowd. "I mean, one Gloucestershire peer has described you as 'rather a nasty virus that everyone's wife caught sooner or later.'" Declan reads off of a card.
"Well if you've seen his wife, it's definitely later." Rupert retorts towards the audience, causing everyone to laugh. Declan's jaw vividly tenses on camera.
You sigh putting your head in your hands. "Oh wow, that's great." You mumble to yourself.
"What a fucking arsehole." Seb mutters, crossing his arms.
"And that's the break in five..." Daysee begins counting down.
You nervously watch as Declan composes himself to announce the commercial break.
"That's time for break. When we return, who knows what Mister Campbell-Black might choose to share with us when we return." Declan says through a forced smile, looking directly at the camera. It felt like he was looking right at you.
"...and we're out." Daysee says.
"Thank fuck." You quickly exit the control room, needing to be elsewhere for the next three minutes. As you make your way through the halls, you run into Taggie.
"Taggie?" You say in a quizzical manner, causing her to turn and face you.
"Y/n, I'm here to talk to Rupert. Something's very wrong about this." She says urgently.
"Jesus, Taggie you can't-" You begin.
Rupert appears around the corner with his assistant. "Taggie, what are you doing here?" He asks her.
Taggie walks past you. "You need to go. Just walk out."
"Rupert, I advise you to not do that." You warn him.
Rupert laughs at you both. "Your father's not the first old socialist who's tried to catch me out." He reassures Taggie, putting his hand on her arm. "Whatever you're worried about, it's already out there."
"Taggie, you need leave-" You begin, tugging at her arm.
"No, I know him." Taggie says, ignoring you as she pulls away from your grasp. "He's saving the worst for later. When he wants something, he's ruthless." She warns him. "He'll do anything, I mean, he's-"
"He's just like you, Rupert." You say, pursing your lips.
"Exactly." Taggie says.
Cameron Cook appears, interrupting the conversation. "Minister, we need you back on set. The break's almost over." She directs Rupert, who keeps his gaze on you and Taggie.
"Listen to Miss Cook, Rupert. You have to go." You say.
"Just walk out of the building with me." Taggie interjects, pleading with her eyes.
"Minister!" Cameron snaps, glaring at Rupert.
"Screw this." You say, walking away from everyone. You return back to the control room, slamming the door behind you.
"What's going on?" Tony Baddingham asks, puffing on a cigar.
"Cameron has it under control." You simply say, returning to the corner with Seb and Daysee.
"What happened?" Seb asks quietly.
"Taggie's shown up to try and get Rupert to leave. She thinks Declan has more blackmail on him than we are aware of." You whisper, grabbing the back of your neck as you watch Daysee begin to count Declan back in.
"Where the fuck is he?" Tony says harshly, looking down through the viewing glass.
You hide your face behind your clipboard, unable to watch the scene about to unfold.
"Y/n look, Rupert's back." Seb says, tapping on your back to redirect your attention. You look over the clipboard at the monitors, watching Rupert Campbell-Black sit back down on the stage. Rupert begins to compare the interview to being back on the playing field.
"Seb, I don't have a good feeling about this." You say quietly, covering half your face with a clipboard.
"Just watch, relax." Seb whispers.
"It's an interview, there are no winners." Declan tells Rupert, who gives him a look.
"That's not true though, is it?" Rupert queries, looking towards the audience. "He wants to beat me." He exaggerates, giving a shit-faced grin.
Your eyes widen as Rupert begins to compare him to Declan, putting both of them under the same umbrella metaphorically. Declan brings it back around by repeatedly shitting on Campbell-Black, about to pull out an envelope from underneath his blazer as Rupert does something no one expected; admitting everything Declan has said to be true.
"Oh god." You whisper.
"I remember what it was like, to be the best. And what I was willing to do to stay there." Rupert says grimly. "What are you... willing to do?" Rupert asks in a taunting manner.
Declan goes quiet.
"To your family?... To yourself?" Rupert asks solemnly, the both of them having a stare down as the control room starts to light up in commotion.
You watch in fear as Tony urges Declan in his earpiece to take down Rupert, your eyes flickering between the multiple camera angles on a very, very quiet Declan.
"You're right." Declan finally says. "I'm a workaholic. And when I'm consumed by something... I can be, um... I can be a-"
"Monster." Rupert finishes the sentence, the both of them sharing a stare once again.
Rupert makes a comment about Declan being a better husband than he ever was, which causes you to look away from the screen when Declan argues against it. You couldn't help but feel as if you're one of Declan O'Hara's many flaws.
The interview starts to go in the opposite direction. You look back at the screen, watching Declan pull out his earpiece as Tony becomes enraged.
"If it's any consolation, we've made some really great television." Cameron Cook reasons.
"This would have worked if you'd just done your fucking job!" Tony yells at her, causing the rest of you to side eye him madly.
"Seb, I need to go home." You tell him flatly, putting your clipboard down.
"What? Y/n, the show isn't over yet! Where are you going?" Seb exclaims quietly, confused by your course of action. Daysee also gives you a look of worry.
"I just said home! I'll see you on Monday." You whisper aggressively, leaving the control room.
You hastily go over to your desk to retrieve your bag and coat. You glance over quickly at the viewing room the rest of the staff was in, your stomach tying in knots as the sight.
Heading down the hallway and the stairs, you push open the front doors and end up outside, where a massive group of fans stood awaiting Rupert Campbell-Black's return. They all share looks and noises of disappointment as they see you, an intern on the brink of tears instead of the acclaimed bachelor.
You push through the crowd, hurriedly approaching your car and unlocking it. You sit inside the beater and stare off in the distance. Your cheeks are stained with tears against your own will, your forehead resting upon the steering wheel as you begin to sob mercilessly.
You felt so hopeless amidst it all, no longer sure of yourself as you were before.
-
i will not lie this chapter was becoming so fucking long it's just gonna end up a continuation into the next part... also im lowkey too awkward to properly write out sex scenes because i give myself second hand embarrassment so forgive me this fanfic is plot driven over sex driven (':
as youve noticed ive started to follow by the episode plot line, it makes it easier for me to write and follow. thank you again for the support, and as always keep interacting with my works! keep me motivated ;)
much love,
isabel
#aidan turner#declan o’hara#declan o'hara x you#declan o'hara x reader#rivals fic#rivals 2024#rivals
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i wish my brain would . stop. or at least slow down a bit
#the fey speaks#cant even finish one thought before i get interrupted by 5 more....#truthfully wonder if what was diagnosed as adhd when i was a kid was actually a combo of autism + mania#maybe not though. tbh. maybe i have a 'delightful' mix of all three.#but anyway i was saying that because i don't actually USUALLY have my own thoughts distract me from my own thoughts.#i'm pretty distractable via external stimuli but not so much internal . except for when i am manic.#and idk the thoughts interrupting thoughts things seems like an adhd experience. but like i could still have it and just not that symptom.#i am not even really thinkinga bout this to be clear. this is just word vomit#even if i wanted to consider 'whether or not i actually have adhd'#which i do not.#i am pretty sure under normal brain conditions i have never doubted it#so i am probably just like. seeing things wrong right now#sorry my brain shut whatever i was thinking about there down already i forgot where i was going#i think i was just gonna say i think it wouldn't be very fruitful TO consider it. consdiering im a bit impaired atm#probably not the right way to word that but whatever.#ACKTUALLY maybe i shouldn't even be manic posting in the first place?
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──𐙚 delicate seashell - beach vibe, hotel sex
────୨ৎ────
content: friendgroup beach trip, hotel sex, penetrative sex, sweet loving, kind of body worship, established relationship, oral (fem), "gguk" bc its hawt
note from cherry: ignore the typos pls it's late :(
────୨ৎ────
summer hit seoul like a ton of bricks, the usual rainy weather turnings into 40 degree Celsius heat, living without aircon? Impossible.
For the first week of vacation that your work has granted, your far less busy friends and boyfriend all gather up for a trip
Fuck it, let's fly to jeju and enjoy the seaside while the sun lasts
Although blaring and someone unbearable from sweat drenched clothes, noting beats a beach day with enough suncream and fruit to cool off
"Soojin, are you gonna be ready soon?" namjoon calls out, your best friends boyfriend being just as impatient as she is,
"Seriously? We just started getting ready!" She shouts back, rolling her eyes at the closed door,
Sully who's also your childhood bestie, and you share a giggle at Soojin's typical behavior
"Baby?" a soft voice calls out for you, sticking his head into the small gap of the huge hotel bathroom, three girls still in pj's that are busy with skincare and waterproof mascara or the perfect bun all inside
His eyes only land on you, if the other two didn't speak, you're sure he wouldn't even have noticed
"Kook? You okay?" You turn, caressing his head with your hand,
"Yeah, we're gonna ahead though, if that's cool with you? Like, set up the chairs and drink station" he says, now stepped fully inside the doorframe, his hands finding your tshirt covered waist immediately
"If you promise not to look at girls in bikinis?" you raise an eyebrow, cracking into a smile shortly after
And my god did he look irresistible, already in swim shorts with that white muscle shirt that did nothing but show off his ripped body, big arms fully on display and his abs peaking out from the side of the opening
He tsk's , kissing your forhead softly
"You're crazy ma, you know damn well i only care for you" his voice is delicate when he speaks,
"Ew gross get out already" sully yells, even though she's 3 meters away from him
"Grooooosss they boutta start fucking in here" Soojin adds, making a disgusted face for you to see in the mirror
Jungkook laughs, "Sure ladies, take your time" surrendering to the fight against two very protective best friends, he leaves the room
Leaving you to continue your grwm session, 30 mins later, all three off you leave in your bikinis, bags stuffed with change of clothes, hairbrushes and something to keep you distracted
"what the fuck" your boyfriend mutters when he spots you from afar,
Even while laying on a foldable chair, just being able to make out your silhouette in the distance is enough to make him drool, willing to drop to his knees for any taste of you he can get
The dirty thoughts only become louder urges when you stand in front of him, setting your bag down,
As if the tiny, red triangle- tie up bikini doesn't already reveal enough to him, the way you bend down right there, tits almost falling out of their hold, pushed together by the bikini throws him off even more
He's sweating, nervously thinking how he would be able to keep his dick soft for hours if you're gonna walk around like that
"Baby" he says sternly, the look in his eyes letting you know that you're playing with fire, but you don't seem to care, smiling at him when you lay down on the chair right beside his,
"Ahhh, the breeze is so nice" you hum, closing your eyes momentarily to take in the roaring waves and rays of sunlight
Unable to stop himself for devouring you with his eyes, he just allows it
Tracing over your collarbones, the way your waist dips in before the squishy roundness of your hips, how your thicker thighs press up against the chair, making the string bottom appear even smaller on your covered cunt
It cant get worse, right?
Unless you decide on what you're doing right now, letting your beautiful hair out of the bun's restraint, shiny stands flowing messily over your chest area
You notice his obvious staring, looking at his needy eyes and spotting the suspicious looking bulge inside his swimmers,
Jaehyun shoots Jungkook a look as if to say "you cannot be serious" once he also notices the effect your innocent swim attire has on the younger friend
You stand up from the chair abruptly, while looking at Jungkook's dick you noticed how muscular and comfortable his thighs look,
"Baby please" he whispers into your ear, your ass planted down right on his bulge, the tiny string doing nothing to create an extra barrier
His hands move to caress your thighs, his chest pressed up against your back while he's trying his best not to grind you down on him in front of your whole friend group
"Namjoon, you need to cover my back well" Soojin says to her boyfriend when turning around and jungkook is sure he will thank her for this to the end of time, something in his brain lights up,
"Oh shit, i totally forgot about sunscreen. Lets go grab it" his finger nudges your side, a clear clue for you to agree and get up with him,
Why would you ever deny him anyways?
Your friends watch you leave hand in hand, rushing back for... the sunscreen..
"They're gonna fuck aren't they" Sully says, looking over to the rest with an annoyed look,
"Yep" Soojin answers, popping the p at the end,
"Whatever i'm going in" jaehyun announces, dragging sully up with him to push the unsuspecting girl into the water
"Fuck baby this bikini is too sexy, i can't take it" Jungkook says against your skin, immediately attaching himself to your neck the second the door shuts
He's gentle but desperate in his kisses, moving along messily but not putting on too much pressure, kissing his way all along your jawline, down to your neck and collarbones where be begins to nibble,
"So pretty, this body of yours is driving me crazy" his soft moans make your skin react, goosebumps spreading fast while you run your fingers along the muscle of his shoulder
He unties your top in no time, kissing and licking at your nipple while his hand stimulates the other one, groping and tugging on the pink flesh ws gently as he can
"Feels so good gguk" your nails dig into his shoulders, chest arching into his mouth with loud whimpers of pleasure flowing from your lips,
He responds by moaning, biting down on your nipple softly before switching sides, teasing and kissing with so much love
"I love your tits so much, they are perfect so perfect" Jungkook stops, big doe eyes looking up at you with need, one hand moves down to cup your pussy,
"let me eat it please , i wanna taste you so bad baby, please let me eat that sweet little pussy out" the way his desperation becomes evident in his pleas instantly weakens your will to tease him, nodding to him with a small bite to your lip
He wastes no time carrying you to the soft silk of the hotel bed, spreading your legs with his hands and dragging the string down from your hips,
"Mnhmm baby you smell so good" his kisses trail down your abdomen until they halt on the outside of your pussy, moving to your inner thighs instead, his hands working to caress you in the meantime
"Gguk please" you whine, squirming under the soft touch of his hands running down the inside of your thigh,
He smiles, leaning his head down between your thighs, right in front of your glistening cunt,
Thumbing your clit side to side, he takes a second to admire you, back arched just for him
"Cute pussy, all mine"
"Mghmm yes!" your high voice cries out, fingers finding his small locks and engulfing them into you, tugging at them while simultaneously pushing his head further into your neediness
"Just like that" you continue rambling, grinding your heat against his skilled, warm tongue that's working hard to lapp up all your juices
His tongue is tireldessly pushing into your hole, fucking you until you can't help but shake,
"You taste so good pretty"
"Prettiest girl" he whispers, blowing some air on your swollen clit, his cock throbbing inside his swimshorts as much as your soaked entrance
"Want your cock please baby!"
He stops, pressing a kiss to your cunt before crashing his covered lips onto yours, your hands busying with his shorts, pulling his hard on out with a sigh
Then, you turn sideways to kiss his neck, licking over his sweet spots and making him moan until he can't wait anymore, gently lowering your back on the bed and aligning his stiff dick against your entrance
"God so tight" he whines, hands getting lost in the flesh on your hips, you moan from feeling so full,
His bicep flexes while he begins thrusting into you, as needy and hot as it is, he's slow and firm nonethelss, keeping his eye contact with you
"You're beautiful" he smiles, referring to so much more than your tits slapping against each other erotically, than your little cunt drenched in slick or your soft face in the sunlight, he means everything, every little detail on your skin, that mole on your neck, that sound from your lips, the way you touch him, the way you love him
"You feel so so good, so pretty too ggukie" your moans are genuine and long, not hasty or in a rush to release
He does feel himself get close when you begin touching his torso, abs flexing with the little touches and his cock becoming more and more desperate to paint your gummy walls white
Savoring the moment with a passionate kiss, he caresses your hips and listens carefully to your moans,
"Almost there pretty, cum for me" his encouragement drives you up the edge, the, getting pushed over it by his finger drawing small circles on your oversensitive clit
You cum blissfully, coating his cock in your essence while he paints you with his, smiling into ths open mouthed, messy kiss
"Mhm.. i love you" he breathes out, kissing your cheek repeated, his softer cock remaining inside you
"I love.. you too jungkook" you reciprocrate, pressings a tiny kiss to his nose
The romantic moment is disturbed by your phone buzzing,
Soojin: did u find the suncream or did he cream you instead?
Both of you giggle, sending a selfie that shows both of you are probably naked, happy and definitely naked.
── ‧ ୨୧ @luvismenu
#redcherrykook#jungkook x reader#jungkook fanfic#jeon jungkook#jungkook x you#jungkook x y/n#bts fanfic#bts jungkook#jungkook smut#jungkook fluff
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no more ace to play [mamma mia part two] | formula one social media au
drivers: sebastian vettel, fernando alonso and jenson button
the investigation was fruitful but now y/n has a handful of drivers and a bucket load of criticism
general note: i answered an ask about this but i thought i'd reiterate here, this is a no wives or kids au, so seb and jenson's wives and kids do not exist in this !! thank you so much for all the lovely feedback on the last part, hopefully i remembered to tag everyone who asked x
part one | masterlist | ko-fi
yourusername
liked by sebastianvettel, jensonbutton and 1.405,605 others
tagged: fernandoalo_oficial, sebastianvettel, jensonbutton
yourusername: so i guess it's kinda real now and they're all lovely x
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user4: i know the bitter old people are going to find this now but i for one think it's fucking ICONIC
user5: the guys are way too chill for the situation
user6: they've not said anything, so how would you know?
user5: idk reeks of babytrapping
user7: be for real y/n doesn't need to baby trap anyone she has her own career?
yourbff: debrief needed STAT
yourusername: literally on my way to yours right now get the non-alcoholic wine READY
landonorris: do i like get a prize for my hand in this?
yourusername: here's a gold star ⭐️
landonorris: i was hoping for some monetary rewards
yourusername: ur literally a millionaire ?
landonorris: and?
user8: are any of them gonna like comment or?
user9: very odd considering they wouldn't shut THE FUCK UP on their own posts
user10: for real they were very proud of their 'accomplishments' but now it's the consequences of their actions and theyre silent ?
user11: have yall considered the fact that finding out you might be a dad is a bit of a shock, let them all process it?
jensonbutton
liked by lewishamilton, sebastianvettel and 302,889 others
jensonbutton: back to see the old rides
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user12: SPILL JENSON PLEASE
user13: so like what team is this kid going to support they've got so much to choose from?
user14: if they have any taste, ferrari 💅
user15: i mean their momma clearly has taste so ....
oscarpiastri: nice to meet you jenson!
jensonbutton: by how much mark talks about you i could've sworn i'd already met you
aussiegrit: bold of you to send shots my way considering your current predicament
user16: mark saying this like they aren't lucky to be with y/n ?
user17: bro we all saw that you met up with y/n and the baby daddy squad... wanna maybe share some thoughts?
user18: why would he want to publicise that he got with a slag?
user17: i know you're not calling y/n a slag when we're talking about f1 playboy JENSON BUTTON ?
user19: i have complete faith that this mamma mia summer WILL have a good ending but i NEED these men to maybe actually talk about it so people aren't just out here coming for y/n ?
yourusername
liked by fernandoalo_oficial, jensonbutton and 1,209,677 others
yourusername: got myself a sweet treat and did some meditation (i.e. listening to asmr roleplay) because life is crazy and morning sickness is a bitch
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user24: not to be sappy but i am emotional watching y/n go through this, she's been on the internet for so long i feel like i've watched her grow up, idk anything about f1 but i hope they're good for her
yourbff: gosh who knew you getting pregnant would lead to us having to go to the bakery every single morning
yourusername: but but but they have such good croissants and SHUSH I BUY YOU YOURS EVERYDAY
yourbff: i know you're like my sugar mama, please still buy me pastries when you have your actual child
user25: i think we're all being a wee bit dramatic about the whole "they haven't said anything" business. yes, they probably should say they're fine with it so people stop accusing y/n of baby trapping them but ALSO we don't know what they do everyday, maybe we should just let the adults go about their business
charles_leclerc: i am basically seb's kid so i shall be a character witness: that man is an ANGEL and believe me that took a lot for me to say in public lol
yourusername: why thank you charles, i have heard a lot about you. in fact on his "provisional dad cv", sebastian directly named you, some guys called max verstappen, mick schumacher and lance stroll as fatherly experience
maxverstappen1: LOL I KNEW SEB LOVED ME BUT WTF IS A DAD CV
sebastianvettel: this is a serious matter and i wanted to show that i'm serious about fatherhood
mickschumacher: soz max, charles and lance i think WE all know who his favourite is
lancestroll: i'm just happy to be recognised tbf
yourusername: well i kinda hope this real child will be his favourite...
charles_leclerc: boring 🥱
alexalbon: well i'm gonna nominate myself as jenson's grid kid and woah that guy is great 👍
jensonbutton: sounds kinda sarcastic but thanks for the effort alex
carlossainz55: seeing as we're all here i'll say that nando is the best grid dad sorry not sorry
yourusername: you're all here but idk who you people are ?
fernandoalo_oficial: chilli have i ever told you how proud i am of you?
stoffelvandoorne: do i mean nothing to you old man
user26: wtf is going on here
fernandoalo_oficial
liked by yourusername, sebastianvettel and 1,403,677 others
fernandoalo_oficial: what a race! thankful to finally be back on the podium this weekend and i'd like to dedicate this race to the soon-to-be new addition and my new family, here's to our future ❤️
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user27: HOLY SHIT THIS IS SO CUTE
user28: i'm sorry the THUMB IN THE MOUTH CELEBRATION ARE YOU KIDDING?
jensonbutton: proud of you, come home quick x
user29: i'm sooooo chill about this
fernandoalo_oficial: i'll make sure to tell the team that THE jenson button wants the meeting to go faster
sebastianvettel: do i mean nothing? that's literally my old team name drop ME
yourusername: just tell them i've gone into labour
fernandoalo_oficial: you've not even been pregnant two months yet...
yourusername: they don't know that
astonmartinf1: this is a public instagram comment section...
maxverstappen1: maybe when the little one is actually here i'll let you win for once
fernandoalo_oficial: how kind of you?
maxverstappen1: i need the little one to know that at least one of you is cool and that i should be their favourite god father
lewishamilton: now that is a bold assumption
danielricciardo: i have been quiet on this topic but if anyone is prime god father material YOU'RE LOOKING AT HIM
yourusername: you'll all receive an email and a god father application in the coming weeks
charles_leclerc: is this another seb idea?
yourusername: maybe... but idk yall so i think it's a good idea
yourusername
liked by maxverstappen1, mickschumacher and 1,509,874 others
tagged: jensonbutton, fernandoalo_oficial, sebastianvettel
yourusername: welcome to the crazy house
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user33: so we've confirmed the poly? yes or no?
user34: i'm gonna say yes but with them you literally never know
georgerussell63: so we all sent them a jellycat?
alexalbon: speak for yourself george that sick ass rocking bunny is all albon
user35: not to be weird but this kids is literally going to have the hottest parents of all time
user36: no cause if i'm a teacher and all of them walk in for parent's evening i'm passing out
jensonbutton: oh wow what a lovely crib i wonder who put that together
fernandoalo_oficial: don't you dare take all the credit
sebastianvettel: as if anyone other than the WOOD WORK KING put that together
yourusername: guys they are lying the delivery guy put it together and they all stood around watching like dads at the airport
jensonbutton: "like dads" so still getting the experience in
danielricciardo: so who is responsible for this grandpa ass nursery aesthetic?
yourusername: well this is awkward i thought it was cute
fernandoalo_oficial: it is don't worry honey, it matches seb's overall grandpa aesthetic
sebastianvettel: you guys agreed to move to mine don't switch up on my aesthetic now
jensonbutton: oh seb we all love your certain affinity for tartan and plaid
sebastianvettel: i'm not feeling this love right now :(
yourusername: cuddle pile incoming
note: ahhh okay this was very highly requested so i hope it met expectations. i'm thinking this could defo be a longer series (i am also working on into the arms of another dw) following the whole family if yall would like that? i'm gonna try and tag everyone who requested that, i am sorry if i missed anyone x
taglist: @boiohboii @vellicora @faithm120601 @raizelchrysanderoctavius @luv4kani @minkyungseokie @eugene-emt-roe @magical-spit @ironmaiden1313 @jaydaaasworld @whoreks @rainerax @nonsensical-nonsence @laneyspaulding19 @chelseyyouraverageluigi @lxclerc @gemofthenight @woweewoowa
#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 instagram au#f1 x you#f1#sebastian vettel instagram au#sebastian vettel x reader#sebastian vettel#sebastian vettel imagine#sebastian vettel x you#fernando alonso instagram au#fernando alonso x reader#fernando alonso imagine#fernando alonso#jenson button instagram au#jenson button x reader#jenson button imagine#mamma mia au#astonmartinii
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Sorry for lack of post, work has been absolutely kicking my ass, so I'll drop these little low effort headcannons I came up with after doing the newest genshin event. GN fairy reader. Slight spoilers??
Also to the person who sent in your Zzz request I promise I will work on it soon. Forgive me.
Wanderer:
He's very much the type of guy who even though he thinks of you as the gorgeous forest fairy, he's not gonna say it to your face. He will show up when you need help and act all reluctant about doing things for you even though he enjoys them. Then one day out of nowhere he will be staring at you and just accidentally blurt out what he's feeling like, "You're beautiful sunshine."
Then we all die.
Navia:
Girl literally calls you her partner and would die for you, so to say she'd be the type to compliment you with no shame is a understatement. The two of you would be walking through the paper woods and she would just go, "By the way, I just thought I'd tell you how much I appreciate you and all you have done for me. You truly have my heart, partner." And then she'd wink at you as your face turned bright red.
Kazuha:
Why's he here? Cause I like him shush. Anyways, forest fairies are a great source of inspiration for poems yeah, but he'd also want to draw you as well. Combine both his word building of your powers and beauty along with a image that he says could never truly capture the wonder that you are, but give those who look at it a glimpse. Then he'd ask if you wanted to sit under a paper tree and share bulle fruits with the flying squirrels.
Diluc:
Lets be honest, he wouldn't believe you at first. Forest fairy? Not real. Then he'd look around him, see the paper forest and probably have a little mini panic attack without moving a single muscle or looking any different on the outside. He'd eventually loosen up after you explain things and I don't know why, but I totally see him dancing with a fairy reader. If it helps the forest...he will oblige, albeit reluctantly.
Alhaitham:
Wouldn't be fazed in the slightest. Couldn't actually care less that he's in a different world, he's read fairytales before, he's seen what visions can do so it's no shock to him. You however, kinda surprise him. Normally he's always nonchalant about others, but you...he doesn't mind letting you sit with him while he reads. He doesn't even mind helping you when you need him too, his ways of romancing are subtle, but sweet.
Damn, actually wrote alot of these. I wanna do this again with more time and I'm also hungering to write some smut too so whenever I'm not struggling to stay awake after work I'll be posting more~
#𓍊damushroomguy𓍊#genshin impact#genshin fanfic#genshin x reader#wanderer fluff#wanderer x reader#navia x reader#navia fluff#kazuha fluff#kazuha x reader#diluc x reader#diluc fluff#alhaitham x reader#alhaitham fluff
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the sirius watermelon fic was SO CUTE I NEED A PART TWO OF THEM GETTING TOGETHER
watermelon pyjamas pt.2
sirius finally tells you how he feels. (the classic angry confession trope) part 1
words: 1.7k
genre: literally idiots™ to lovers, roommate!sirius, hurt/comfort(?), confession, lil angst, ends with fluff.
a/n: guys this is like my first ask. eeeek! thanks for requesting and reading<3
.....
“I’m an idiot”
“You're gonna have to elaborate."
“James, please."
Sirius wasn't sure if he would classify this as a bad day. Realising he's in love with you wasn't the worst thing that could happen to him, but hearing James gloat about how right he had been was.
He had managed to avoid you that evening, even the next day, internally panicking over what to do. But he was home in the evening, ignoring that stupid warm feeling in his chest when he saw your shoes in front of the door.
He entered the room, and sighed.
I'm fucked.
“Did you buy fruit themed pyjamas?" Sirius asked, his eyes moving over the cherry printed clothing. He was annoyed, not at you, mostly at himself. He couldn't find a single explanation why this affected him so much, but it did.
“I have watermelon, cherry, kiwi and peach.” You counted on your fingers.
“Wear the peach one tomorrow." Sirius grimaced at his too quick of a response, thankfully his face wasn't visible. He wasn't very proud of himself right now.
"I meant like- as a suggestion, that sounds cute, you know." He tries to explain himself, cringing on his own words.
Your eyebrows raise in surprise, amused by his eagerness, “Do you want these? You seem to like them a lot." You asked cheekily.
Yeah, sure. That's exactly why I want you to wear these, Sirius though internally. His thoughts had involved you in his bed with the pants on, maybe off, but he kept that shamefully to himself.
The next couple of days felt torturous. Sirius felt like he had to physically restrain himself from reaching for you. Anytime you touch his shoulder, lean against him, huddle together on the couch, he overthought everything.
Every touch left him breathless, every look made it hard to breath. I need help.
.
You were distraught. For some reason, for the last few days, Sirius was acting weird. He had started pulling away from you, as if watching you from a distance. No ruffling your hair, no forehead kisses, no comfortable touches. It's not as if he owed you any affection, but he had stopped.
He knew.
He knew you had feelings for him. Even if he doesn't, which you desperately hope is the truth, he has a problem. You didn't know what to do. Everytime you thought to ask him something, he'd make up an excuse and leave. He definitely didn't want to talk to you.
Lily had suggested exactly as you predicted, the usual, you should talk to him, maybe he was just busy. And other times, she had been right, but not this time. All of this had led you to the inevitable decision, something you should have done long ago. Maybe if you had, this wouldn't have happened.
……
"I'm gonna move out, Lils.” You say into the phone,"What? Why?” Lily exclaimed, rather dramatically.
You sigh,"I can't live like this. He doesn't owe me anything. I shouldn't be expecting… things from him.”
There's a slight pause before you continue,"And I can't move on if I live with him. It's too painful, and too hard."
“Here's the real reason."
Lily felt like bashing her head against a wall. How can two people be so stupid at the same time? You two were perfect for each other, both too oblivious to see the obvious.
“Listen, I really think you should just tell him, even if you move out. He wouldn't stop being your friend, honey."
You hum as she says, but part of you knows you can't say it. You don't have the guts. You hear the familiar click of the door, Sirius is home.
“Lils, I've gotta go. I'll talk to you later." You hang up the phone, not listening to whatever she said at the end, too nervous to care.
Your hands are sweaty, and your hands are fidgeting constantly. Sirius comes in and can immediately sense your anxious energy,
“What happened, lovely?" He asks, his voice cooing as he moves over to you.
He's used to you busying yourself around the house, sometimes bobbing your head to music as you wash the dishes, or some other silly thing, he could go on.
“Sirius, we need to talk." You say quickly, your words too rushed, dreading this conversation.
Sirius' heart feels like it's going to lurch out.
Oh no.
He thinks that you know, somehow. That he had… he'd stopped saying it at a point. The impossibility of it all was a painful reminder. Now you're going to confront him. He's fucked.
“Okay…” He says, his voice too quiet now.
You rub your hands to pep yourself up, encouraging yourself to not lose track,
“I'm gonna move out."
The silence that takes over is one more overwhelming than any noise. Sirius is sure now, you definitely know. A dangerous dread spreads over his body, like a disease covering itself around him.
“It's not because of you, it's because of me." Sirius has the urge to scoff at the cliched statement, but his body feels too stiff, his eyes stuck on you.
But Sirius needed closure. So, whatever your feelings were, Sirius needed to hear why you're leaving.
“Why?" His voice is void of emotion. It breaks your heart.
A pitiful chuckle escaped you, “Sirius, you've made it clear you don't want me here."
Don't confront him. This wasn't the plan.
It wasn't. It wasn't even the reason you were moving out. But he was still your friend, he had still hurt your feelings. You were still mad at him, even though you had no right to be.
“What the hell do you mean?" Sirius asks, incredulous. How could he ever not want you here?
“We haven't talked properly in days. You answer me in singular words-"
Sirius cuts you off, feeling oddly defensive, even if what you were saying wasn't untrue,
“I've been busy-"
“Oh you've been busy before, Sirius. You never did this," You wave him off, but meeting his eyes, you say, “It's alright, I got the message, if you don't want me here-" Your voice rises despite your efforts as the conversation gets more heated,
"So what then? You're just gonna move out? Am I that terrible?” Sirius asks, sarcastically. Typical, you think. You pinch the bridge of your nose in frustration,
"Sirius, I told you, this isn't about you,”
Right now, he isn't keen on listening to your reasoning. In his mind, it's all his fault. It's his fault that you have to leave. He's scrambling for explanations,
"Look, I'm sorry that I'm in love with you, alright? I couldn't help myself. Hell,” He laughs, pity and amusement lacing his words, “I didn't even know until a few weeks ago.”
Sirius felt like his world was falling apart. His heart has dared to love someone, and it backfired. He doesn't regret that he loves you, he couldn't. He had no control over that, ever. He was always going to be in love with you.
He only regrets that you found out, somehow. But he supposed that was also inevitable, you weren't daft.
“The point is,” His pleading eyes look at you, “It’s my problem to deal with, not yours.” His eyes are watching your face, you don't know what he might find, “Please, don't leave.”
A few moments pass, and it's as if the world is coming back to you. And one sentence rings in your head, distinct from any other sentence he's said.
I'm sorry that I'm in love with you.
“You what??” You ask, your voice full of incredulity. It feels like someone had hit you with a hammer, or pushed you off a cliff.
“I didn't want to be the guy who's your friend and then tells you he's in love with you, you know? I'm sorry that I love you, but you don't have to leave. If it matters, I will. You should stay here.” Sirius stammers out, his voice laced with pain and nervousness.
Your hands are wrapped under his, his hands clutching yours like they could stop you. They probably did stop you.
"You're in love with me?” You ask, your heart in your mouth, as if one word would be enough to tip you over.
“Please don't make me say it again." Sirius pleads, his eyes slightly watery.
Your eyes flick back and forth to both of his, searching for any kind of hesitance on his face, but it's plain. He's said those words like they were casual, as if they didn't just break your brain. There's nothing to say, or there are no words coming to your brain which are enough to convey your emotions.
A smile spreads across your lips and you bite your lips to conceal it undoing your hands from his to cradle his face,
“You’re in love with me.”
Sirius' pleading frown transforms to a confused one, and he nods, even if you hadn't asked it as a question this time.
You laugh, a watery laugh before you meet your lips to his, smiling too hard to kiss him properly.
Sirius feels like his body is on autopilot, his hands immediately cradling the back of your neck, his other one holding your wrist, his lips immediately responding to yours, as if it was all too natural.
In all his ‘foreseen’ outcomes, this hadn't been a possibility.
He smiles too, confusion still evident at the back of his mind, but he could only focus on the feeling of your lips on his, your hands holding his face.
His head tilts as he tries to get a better angle, desperate to know your tells and signs, his hand wrapping around your waist to pull you closer.
You smile again, breaking the kiss but his lips chase you which makes you laugh more, and he hides his face in your shoulder, laughing along with you.
“You're in love with me," You say it quietly, as if you're confirming it to yourself, but he's too close by not to listen.
“And here I was, moving out because I wanted to get over you."
His head whips up, his face dumbstruck,
“What?"
“Mhmm." You bite your lips, and Sirius has half a mind to kiss you again.
“You're also in…." He trails off, his expression confused but you know exactly what he's asking,
“Sirius, I just kissed you."
“Yeah, but what if you just took pity-" You shut him up again, and he melts, exactly as you intended, moulding his body to yours, trying to get as close as he can. If this was your way to shut him up, he could get used to it.
"Wait, so you're not moving out right? Because-" And his words are cut off again, the same way from before.
He smiles against your lips, again, ecstatic. Giddy, even. Sirius could get used to this. Sirius could get used to kissing you as he arrives home.
All this because of fucking watermelon pyjamas.
#sirius black fluff#sirius black drabble#sirius black x y/n#sirius black x you#sirius black x reader#sirius black imagine#sirius black fanfiction#sirius black#sirius black angst#marauders#hp marauders#marauders era#padfoot
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TO GROW LOVE (AND EAT IT TO THE CORE)
pairing: mingyu x gn!reader wc: 8.1k summary: your whole life, you've only wanted one thing. then you meet mingyu. suddenly you want too much, and you wish the summer never ended. notes: farmer!au, established relationship, angst/hurt/a little comfort
this is a birthday fic for my one and only cat @wuahae ! yes this is about half a year late but what can i say. all good things come with time. thank you for being so kind, funny, and thoughtful (and patient)! not a day goes by where i’m not thankful for our friendship :)
and a million thanks to hana @wqnwoos and jackie @97-liners for helping me with edits. literally you guys are insane writers and i will never stop looking up to you.
i. strawberries (the summer we were young)
When a strawberry is ripe, the seeds push out from the heart of the fruit, as if it's bursting from the inside out.
This is one of the few and only things you've learned by living in Seogwipo, where strawberry season comes like a supernova. The May sun, full and heavy, peels into summer, and the roadside farms open their doors, trying to catch stray vacationers from Jeju City on the other side of the island.
That being said, there are approximately two things to do here. One of them is farm. The other is pretend like you have a life, which is your childhood friend Yizhuo's favorite thing to do when she's back from university on summer break.
Today, this involved convincing her ritzy, too-good Seoul friends that they're missing out on this side of Jeju. (Missing out on what? You're not sure. Perhaps the chipped paint of the mural walls, or the endless flat-topped stretches of seagrass. Yizhuo isn't fooling anyone, but you've always liked stretching your legs out in the bed of her pick-up, even on the long drive to nowhere.)
Unsurprisingly, her friends quickly came to the same conclusion. Just one look at your local strawberry patch, with none of the glamour of the bloated tourist traps in the city, and they decided they'd rather spend the afternoon at the beach.
It was then, between the fragaria blooms, when you met Mingyu. He asked for your name, and the rest was history. Yizhuo and co. scattered like the grasping hands of an overripe dandelion and you learned that he was, one, the newly-graduated son of a pair of local farmers, and two, very, very attractive. Almost too much so, especially for a place like this.
Now he holds up a berry, a bright red murder between his fingers, and tells you to try it.
"You must be delusional if you think i'm taking food from a stranger," you laugh, perched on the fence bordering the field. It sprawls before you, melon stripes on the sunbaked ground.
"No, my name is Mingyu," he replies. "No idea who delusional is." His smile, all bright lip and snaggletooth, tears into the scarlet belly of a newly picked strawberry.
"We all know what happened to Persephone."
"Well, if the underworld was a strawberry patch, I wouldn't mind being stuck there for all of eternity."
"What're you picking all these for, anyway?" you ask, watching Mingyu struggle with his too-big straw hat between the vines. His woven basket bleeds over with little berries.
"Jam. I make it on the very first day of every summer."
"Why?"
"You ask a lot of questions for someone who trespassed on my farm. You're cute, but I won't let you off easy."
He laughs at how you balk, clearly red-handed. You're not sure how to tell him you don't think you were supposed to be here either. You don't do things like sit in the back of trucks, trespass, or talk to pretty farmer boys who take a fancy to you, but it's the summer before you graduate and you're not even sure how long you'll have to continue making bad decisions.
"Are you gonna take my first-born now?" you joke instead. The daylight runs down the rim of Mingyu's hat, trickles down his brow, and you wish you could pour the image of him into a jar and keep it forever.
"No, but I will invite you in for some fresh jam on toast. I baked a loaf this morning." and when you say nothing, he continues. "The strawberries are only good once a year. It's the best you'll ever have. Promise."
It's a whine and a half, and somehow you convince yourself this will be the last bad decision you'll make. You've been here long enough to know that good things don't come twice in Seogwipo, and he is unlikely to be an exception.
Yizhuo blows up your phone, you tie the gingham apron around Mingyu's tiny waist, and the basket turns to blood in the saucepan.
Mingyu is right. Love comes to you in that kitchen, high and red like the sun, and the jam never tastes as good as it does that summer.
ii. watermelon (hollowed out, like a magic trick)
"A good watermelon sounds like a heartbeat."
You watch Mingyu heave the fruit, small and striped, out of his grocery bag. It joins the array of egg sandwiches and banana milks you picked up from the store together earlier. (There should have been chocolate Pepero too, but you split the box on the walk).
You're on a picnic, sprawled out on the outcropping overlooking the water. The path up is basically right behind your house, but you had never cared to visit. It had always been the local makeout spot, a schlocky teen crawl for those with nothing better to do, and yet, with Mingyu stretched out beside you, it seems newer. More exciting.
You're still just friends, or at least that's what you told Yizhuo. But ever since you sat on Mingyu's kitchen counter and ate from his jam-covered spatula, you don't think you've gone a week without seeing him. It's been almost two months, which seems so long and yet not long enough—he makes it easy to be greedy.
"See?" He thumps the watermelon with the heel of his palm. "Try it."
You already went through this entire charade at the grocery store, right in front of all the local aunties, but you indulge him. There's little point to triple checking if it's still ripe, but you think he just likes hitting it.
"It sounds good," you say. "But how are we even gonna eat it? We don't have a knife."
"Watch this." Mingyu procures a coin from his pocket. "You didn't learn this in elementary school? I feel like everyone was doing it."
"Here?" you ask, incredulous.
"Yeah, here. I grew up here too, you know."
He holds the edge of the coin to the skin and slams his palm into it once more, so that it lodges itself into the rind, and begins dragging it around the fruit. You start to wonder if he bought the watermelon just to show you a party trick—not that you mind, though. The strain of his biceps peeks through his rolled up white tee, and you remember why he was able to stop you with just one look back when you first met.
"No way." The watermelon is so ripe, it bleeds around the incision. "I feel like I know everyone here. And I definitely would have remembered you."
"I was probably, like, two grades above you," he replies. "And my parents shipped me off to live with my cousins after elementary school. They said I should get out of Seogwipo and experience the real world."
"Good call. There's nothing here." You watch Mingyu spin the melon over to cut through the other side. The coin catches the sunlight, and it looks like gold. "I wish I left for university. The one here is so small."
"Really?" He pauses to show you his handiwork. The two melon halves roll over on their backs, their cut edge cruel and jagged. "Cool, huh?"
"Impressive," you say. "Honestly. I really didn't think that would work."
"I didn't either when I first saw someone do it. But I’ll try anything once," he replies, ripping open the packaging of the plastic spoon from the bag. "I can't believe you don't like it here."
"You do?"
"Yeah. A lot." He shoves the spoon in his mouth, and you watch the watermelon juice pool around his lips. "I missed home. The trees and the tall grass and the ocean. All the fruits. Everything. I learned to ride a bike, right down there by the water."
"Hm." He passes you the spoon. You don't want to hog it, so you carve out a piece bigger than you need. "Are you gonna work at the farm?"
"Maybe. Haven't decided yet," he says. "I think I want to be here, though. Maybe do something with food, but I want to be home."
"That's funny, because I think I’ve always wanted to live a different life. Or at least one somewhere else."
"You want to go to law school, right?"
"Yeah." Mingyu is right. The watermelon is all sugar, and you would almost feel guilty for eating it if it wasn't technically good for you. "I’ve always wanted to be a lawyer. It's something about the people watching, I think."
"That’s really cool," Mingyu says, mouth full but no less sincere. It's then that you notice your shoulders are almost touching, and your heart crawls back up to your mouth. "You know what you want. I admire that."
He makes it sound like a compliment, but you're sure it's a curse.
You think of your parents. There's a permanent wrinkle ironed into their foreheads, the paper crease of expectations and high standards. It's not that they didn't care, but their kind of care was a humbled sort, made heavy by a hard life. It didn't help that your big sister Seohyun went straight from Yonsei to work a big tech job in San Francisco and never once looked back.
But you can't blame any of them—wanting has always been a hereditary failing. Sometimes Yizhuo will catch you frowning at nothing, and then you remember that life isn't a performance and every day ends at the same time no matter how hard you work. But you don't know how to tell her that the only thing you can do sometimes is want, because otherwise you wouldn't really have much at all.
It seems like the exact opposite of how Mingyu lives—everything about him seems to pass like the seasons. Maybe that's why you can't seem to get enough of each other.
"Thank you. Really." You dig the spoon into your half of the melon. There isn't much left. "You're way too nice to me."
"It’s not hard to be," he laughs. "Maybe you're just too hard on yourself."
You're losing track of the distance between the two of you. You can almost feel the heat playing off his skin.
"Maybe."
It's then, under the veil of summer, where you meet Mingyu's gaze and, finally, things seem close to simple.
All you know are his eyes, heavy with sun, and then the slow, slow move of his lips against yours. He tastes like August, long and sweet, and for once you know what it's like to not only want, but to have, and to have again.
The ocean sings on the horizon, and the watermelon bellies weep.
iii. adzuki beans (or, the blood of a headless taiyaki)
Mingyu eats taiyaki headfirst because he says it hurts less.
"That makes no sense," you tell him, your pinkies linked. You never really liked holding hands, but yours fits so perfectly in Mingyu's and there's some girlish, childlike shine to it when you watch his finger search for yours after just a moment separated.
"What do you mean."
He breaks your gaze to eye a red bean taiyaki, like an unwilling predator sizing up their prey. It's the lamest, most embarrassing iteration of National Geographic you've ever seen, and yet you cannot find any fiber within yourself not deeply in love with the lion.
Fall is a forgiving place for your relationship to settle. You're now a senior at university and he's started his gap year. Gap implies he's in the middle of something, but in true Mingyu fashion, he leaves it up to fate, or chance, or something not nearly as kind (whim).
"Taiyaki isn't alive. And why would you want to pretend it is? Eating gummy bears would become an extinction event."
"It kind of is." He holds out the tail end of the taiyaki, the pastry almost explicitly flayed open, in front of you to eat. "Why does the Haribo bear have a face? Why do the gummy bears live in a gummy forest?"
"Great, so now I can’t even enjoy gummy bears without feeling like a serial killer?"
You dig your pointer into his shoulders, broad from all the time he spends on the farm. To think that his hands, big and weathered, were made to pick berries (and now wrap around your pinky finger) is bruising, if not ridiculously funny.
"It's a crime of passion. Gummy passion. Prosecute that."
He kisses your cheek and your heart almost squeezes into two.
The terrible thing about being with Mingyu is how seemingly endless his affection is. Now he's feeding you in public and buying the two of you matching socks (cat and dog, to be exact), although you'll admit it's a little charming, even if the neighbors do gossip.
He's sweet, too sweet, and his kisses stick to the back of your throat.
But you can't be fooled. There's an unsaid violence to the way Mingyu loves. (The meticulous spiral of the peel he carves when you ask for him to cut you an apple. The grind, decisive and cruel, of a knife against a cutting board. A pair of canines against your neck, your jaw.)
Even now, he bites the head off another unwitting taiyaki before stuffing it back in the bag.
"We're still splitsing, right?" he says, with perhaps 1% of his mouth available for speaking and the other 99% murder machine.
Splits, he always says before you share food. You never had the heart to tell him that it's in the same family as mines or sharesies or takebacks—silly childhood relics, ones that no one uses anymore because they don't mean anything.
This time, you don't hear him because you're thinking about the law school fair you went to before Mingyu picked you up. The future is so close, it scares you. A year from now, what ground would you be standing on? Would it smell like this—the peat, the thread-spool fields, the balm of the ocean? Would you still have Mingyu's finger wrapped round yours?
"Have you decided if you're staying at the farm?" you ask.
"Not really." He uses the back of his hand to wipe off his chin. "If my sister decides to take over, I’m actually kinda thinking of going to pastry school instead of getting a masters."
Mingyu had been toying with the idea for some time after you had talked about it on the outlook. It started off as a joke (September; a galette), then a what if (October; green tea mochi), and now it sits at a kinda.
"Kinda?"
The word gathers speed in the pachinko machine of your mind. You never liked being a kinda person. For Mingyu, it seems like a luxury of a word, but for you, it's really just another thing to hide behind. Kinda talented, kinda ambitious, kinda just there. You're always one foot in, one foot out of something better.
"Yeah, kinda. Why?"
"I dunno. What if we both end up leaving?"
"Maybe. You still want to, right?"
You would be lying if you said you didn't—it's what you always wanted. Seogwipo has been a sun-rot, too-small crutch for you, but you would also be lying if you said you weren't terrified that you'd eventually come back, limping like some doomed Icarus, unable to truly make it in the real world.
Then you think of the pockmarked farmland beside your home, lacy with the fall harvest. Even now, you can trace the endless blue of the coastline all the way there, cut through all the maybes and just let the sound of the ocean fold you into sleep like you were a child again. You wonder if Seohyun, all the way on the other side of the world, ever misses it.
"I’m not sure," you say, because, as much as you don't like it, it's the only answer you have.
"It's ok. You'll figure it out. You always do." He squeezes your cheeks together between his thumb and index, laughing at how they pillow out underneath his fingers. "Screw pastry school. I could come with you. Who else would keep you fed?"
Mingyu's complete and unfounded belief in you makes you feel something close to betrayal. How could he say any of that? With what proof? Only someone like Mingyu would be able to hold the wrinkled fruit of your unremarkable life between his palms and see something better than that. Maybe it's because he grew up on a farm. Either that, or he already cares for you too much, too painfully.
Secrets are easy to keep when they look like yours. At least here, in the pit of your stomach, you can keep count, take attendance of them, all your tittering, small anxieties. Some days it feels like your ribs are pressing out, but it's better than cutting everything loose to spill out over what little you do have control over.
You can handle a little pressure. You have to.
What concerns you is the hand Mingyu's got across your chest. With one look, he just might gut you. A twist of the heart-knife, and all those carefully wound insides carved out in an instant—maybe he'd pity you, but worse than that, he'd likely be disappointed.
For you, expectation has always stood taller than shame, and the idea that he sees something past you makes you want to run away.
"I could be a house husband," he says as easily as ever. "You'll be off saving the world, arguing with whoever, and I'll be there to run you a bath afterwards."
"Let's not get too ahead of ourselves," you reply, binding up the strange, hollow feeling in your stomach with a laugh.
There's a scared little girl hiding inside you, and whether Mingyu sees her or not hurts the same. A spade is a spade. You can only pretend so long.
You look at the taiyaki floating in their wax paper bag, blinded and wrought open by the same grin that now peels you down, and you're not hungry anymore.
iv. winter pears (rotten, outside your parents' house)
Mingyu's family loves Christmas.
You think it's because of the pear trees they have in the front yard. They stand bravely before the house, all emerald ash and wisdom in the December freeze. Run your palms over the knobs and it's like you can see into a sleepy visage of simpler days past. (Below its heart, carved: 1982, the year the farm was bought. Along the tangle of the roots: gyu waz here, in an unsure, childish scrawl.)
Winter comes to the countryside crawling on its hands and knees. On days it doesn't snow, there's a mist, boggy and clingy. You've come to realize the cold is more of a threat than a promise, and so the pear trees still bear fruit; the silvery branches hang heavy, faithful.
The first day of December, Mingyu's parents had tasked the two of you with decorating the farmhouse, a duty you took very seriously. You wrapped Mingyu up in string lights and watched him blink in and out like your own personal firefly.
It wasn't until you watched the rafters, the barn doors, the joyous vault of the ceiling all glow, like a spectacular firework, that you finally started to understand why Mingyu was so into the holidays.
It was in the yellow blush of the string lights that you had your first pear from the tree, which Mingyu insisted was a holiday tradition. We make poached pears, he said, mid-bite. You simmer the pear in syrup until it gets so soft, you can cut into it with a fork. Just like butter.
That same night, he kissed you, mouth hot and trembling and tasting of honey, and pressed you against the bark so hard, you could feel the grit of its veins against your skin.
You think December became your favorite month, and pears your favorite fruit.
So much so, that for the entire month, you try to put away your worries about law school applications to celebrate with Mingyu and his family.
You learn his mom makes the best hot chocolate (a cinnamon stick and a dogged devotion to the whisk), and that Mingyu has no clue on God's green earth how to ice skate. (He careens right into your chest the first time. You spend the next hour with him attached to you like a backpack—he manages to find the most impractical ways to do anything, which you somehow admire the most). On Sundays, Yizhuo ditches her Seoul friends and instead accompanies you to the mall two towns over, where she watches you compare different ties and watches and collagen creams as you decide on gifts for his family. (Lilac is so last year, she'd say, stirring the straw of a watered-down milk tea.)
It's not until the weekend before Christmas when you realize just how serious things have gotten. Your feet understand the meander of the dirt path to the farmhouse, your bones the scent of the yellow-skinned apple, the faded wildflowers. Your palms crave the plush of the rug they have in front of the fireplace. Hell, you can't even eat soondubu without thinking of the kind Mingyu's dad makes, with extra anchovies and green onion.
You don't think about what this means. There are ten days left in December and love poured from a full cup never seems to run out.
"Please let me carry some of those," Mingyu wheedles. "Oh my god. I'm like the worst boyfriend in the world."
"No, you are not." you make your way up to his doorstep, taking care to one-two step over the stray roots of one of the pear trees. It's second nature to you by now. "The moment I hand you a box, you are gonna start trying to figure out what it is."
He harumphs and plucks the big one off the top anyway, the one he knows you can't reach. "I didn't even know you were getting us gifts. You didn't have to."
"It's the least I could do. Who shows up to a holiday dinner emptyhanded?" You stop at the front door. "And stop shaking it," you laugh, using the tip of your boot to nudge his shin.
"Okay. Okay," he says, saccharine, adoring, before grabbing the doorknob. "Ready? Are you nervous? You shouldn't be nervous, right? It's not fancy or anything, if you were worried about that."
And that's the thing that wedges itself between your ribs. Mingyu and his whole family are like this. They love and worry and love again; it presses deep into you, fills you, and overflows.
So here you are, standing in your nicest dress and balancing a stack of gifts you hope will amount to something, never enough but something, to repay the people who you feel have loved you more than you deserve. It's all you really have. You do your best, and yet you know when that door opens, it'll all be washed away in a high-tide flurry of hugs and laughter and the familiar press of Bobpul's wet nose against your leg. They're just those kinds of people—they would be just as happy if you didn't bring anything at all, and somehow that makes you feel even more guilty.
"No, no," you wave him off. "I’m fine. Excited."
When Mingyu opens the door, everything goes just as you expected. His sister takes your coat, your gifts are whisked away to the tree (Aji has already figured out which one is his), and his parents descend upon you in a choking swell of warmth and charity.
We baked some fresh bread for your parents (—Thank you so much, but you really shouldn't have.). You look so beautiful in that color (—No, no, you flatter me too much.). Mingyu better be taking good care of you (—He is. He really, really is.).
The kitchen is gauzy with cinnamon, anise. They must be making their famous poached pears, which Mingyu remarks on, just like clockwork.
Dinner passes the same way. It bubbles over with affection, and you feel swallowed by an impossible yearning. This—a full table and a hand to hold underneath it—did you deserve this? And could you keep it?
For an instant, you picture yourself, years later, at this same seat. Mingyu would be fussing over the rice cakes, his apron still gingham because it reminds him of the day you two met. His parents, grayer but no less happy, bickering over the shade of tinsel on the tree. And the dogs, coiled at your feet like they are now. The vision laps at your bones like you're a raft in a storm.
You're pulled back into the moment when Mingyu squeezes your hand, grounding and insistent. "Mom asked how school was going. I told her I think you're basically the smartest person I know, and I’m pretty sure you're getting into whatever law school you want."
Mingyu's parents laugh, and they cut through their pears.
"Oh, sorry," you say. "Um."
Clink. Knife meets flesh, meets porcelain. Your cheeks are hot. You wanted to talk about anything other than yourself tonight. Clink.
"The top programs are a reach, but it'd be nice." clink. "I just want to get in somewhere."
"They’re all so far away," Mingyu's mom remarks. "So grown up. Any school will be lucky to have you. You'll get into all of them."
Clink.
"Or maybe you can stay here." You watch the prongs of Mingyu's father's fork disappear into the pear. "Keep us old folk company."
"No, no, I think Mingyu should take notes and get off his lazy ass," his sister says, teasing. "Going back to the city will be good for him."
"So you can, what, burn down the kitchen again?" Mingyu grumbles, and the whole table seems to boil over with laughter.
"We’re kidding," his mom tells you. "No matter where you go, I’m sure you'll do great. We can even throw you a party at the end of the year. For graduating."
Clink. Clink.
There's a horrible uneasiness writhing around in your stomach. It's pear and syrup and clove and a blackness, an anxious, selfish one that sucks up all the generosity of the evening and turns it into shame.
Mingyu's mom is talking about throwing you a graduation party, something you didn't even think to do for yourself, and here you are, thinking about the shaking moment you open your rejection letters and the lonely path you'll draw on your way back home.
It's ok. They missed out, Mingyu would say, pouring you a consolation drink, and then it would be over. You'd go home and sit on your bed and the trifold piece of paper would go round and round your head like it was in a washing machine.
Your heart, an inventory of tasks and goals and tally marks. Things you've taken and things you've owed. It's a soft, boneless excuse. Be grateful. Give them that, at least.
Clink.
Dessert ends before you can tell his family not to get their hopes up. Mingyu's mom sends you off with your loaf of bread and a kiss on the cheek, and the moment is gone.
"Gyu," you call out on the steps in front of the house.
There are words at the seam of your lips. You want to tell him you're sorry for worrying so much. For making the whole dinner about you and then very possibly having nothing to show for it when it matters. For the heaviness in your chest. Your cowardice. But none of it comes out.
Instead you watch Mingyu pull at the leaves of a pear tree, watching the frost-filigree they get at the end of the season. He looks over his shoulder and smiles at you, as if he's on the hazy cover of a magazine. His eyes bend so wonderfully at the corners when he looks at you, and it breaks your heart.
"You had fun, right?" he asks. "My parents like you a lot, you know. I think they really do."
But that's the problem, you want to say. You all do, and I have no idea why.
Some of the pears are beginning to rot now. You watch one drop off the vine, and it caves to the pavement like it was made of nothing at all.
v. wild barley (grows like weeds)
In March, you play house.
Your parents leave on a two week trip to see relatives, and Mingyu takes it upon himself to make sure you survive.
It's a kind, blinding charade.
(7 am, breakfast. You usually don't even eat breakfast, but you wake up to doenjang and a smile, one that presses itself to yours until you're wearing it on the long walk to school.)
(4 pm, the stretch between lunch and dinner. You're muddling through another useless club meeting when Mingyu sends you a picture of him in your mom's apron, making kimchi. Kiss the chef, he texts you. You promise to, over and over and over.)
It's good until it isn't.
That isn't to say that it's Mingyu's fault. In fact, it's never really Mingyu's fault, and that's the worst thing about your relationship. Sometimes you wish he was worse just so there was someone else to blame.
(1 am, a fridge-cold glass of water and a hand on the column of your spine. Can't sleep? He asks. Just had a weird dream, you say.
It's a lie. You're a liar.
You miss your parents and the first wave of acceptance letters comes out in two days. You're not like him. Sleep has never been a cure for the exhaustion you're feeling, and you have no way of telling him that however warm the bed is won't fix that.)
It's on a Thursday afternoon when you open your mailbox and see the tiny, thin envelope that you've been expecting for the past week. You don't need to open it to know what it says, and yet you do it anyway.
The sun is white, a ghost in the spring sky. The ocean bleeds into the overcast, the curly barley stands tall around your feet, and you let the worst letter you've gotten in your life fall upon your shoulders, word by terrible word.
Then you close it, pinching the seam shut, and draw up your brave face. Nothing left to do but be brave. You're convinced you've used up all the sadness in your relationship—spend in pennies and the well still runs dry. Mingyu will cup your cheek and call you darling, pouring into your emptying basin, holey and broken.
You see him now through the kitchen window, Venus in his clamshell of a kitchen. Galbijjim day, he had said this morning. Now, he waves at you, glittery with recognition.
Your throat feels like crumpled paper.
Mingyu smiles at you, hazy through the glass. Your cheeks hurt and your mouth is paper mache, but you smile back anyway.
///
The letters come one after another.
You know what the envelopes hold and yet you keep opening them. The little folder you keep stashed in your bottom drawer gets fatter every passing day because you can't help but revisit your misery, almost as if you need to remind yourself it exists.
Mingyu is none the wiser. Today he decides he'll put off pastry school for one more year. "It doesn't feel like the right time," he says, rolling a log of burdock kimbap up. "You know what I mean?"
No, you don't. You never really do.
You do know, however, that it would feel really fucking bad that, come the end of the year, to have nothing. All your friends would be going somewhere—even Yizhuo opened her acceptance to an MFA program in Shanghai yesterday—and you would be here, still, feet firmly planted in the muddy Jeju dirt like they always had been.
"Hey, don't look so disappointed." he jokes. "Don't tell me you're already trying to get rid of me."
You're not, you really aren't. But part of you wonders if it's just a race to the bottom. If you got rid of him before he decided he wanted to get rid of you, maybe it would hurt a lot less. One less letter for the folder.
"Never. But imagine if you picked up a French accent at pastry school. Then I’d consider it. Maybe."
You watch his knife rock back and forth on the cutting board as he cuts the kimbap.
"Some for you. And more for me," he says, in what you can only describe as someone attempting to speak French when they've never heard it before. "Unless you want more, mon cherie."
He brings the plates to the table, his grin nothing short of dizzying.
"I’m irresistible, huh? Still wanna leave me now?"
"You're gonna have to try a little harder than that, I think."
The words roll off your tongue, easily, traitorously.
You watch the kimbap disappear off of Mingyu's plate.
Going, going, gone.
///
Seogwipo is always dark at night, only kept alive by the glow of the moonlit sea.
You can't sleep. Again. And so you sit out on the steps in front of your house, letting the twilight wrap around you like a blanket.
You got your last letter back earlier today. You held your breath and tore it open like you would a birthday card with money in it.
Waitlisted.
It was surely better than a rejection, but some naive, child-eyed part of you thought that if you had just closed your eyes and hoped hard enough, things would work out the way you had planned. Tragically, it wasn't enough this time. You wanted and wanted and you thought maybe that would mean you'd come close to deserving it.
Your parents called today. After managing to sideline the issue of basically the rest of your entire life, they had finally cut through your sad little charade. No good news yet, huh?
No, but—
It was always like that with you. No, but it's not as bad as you think. No, but give me a chance. No, but I’m trying. I've been trying.
You wish things didn't come out of you so complicated. That you could be like Seohyun, who could go through school with her eyes closed and still graduate at the top of her class. Instead, you parade around your little failures, trying to convince people it all could mean something only if they squinted. See? It isn't so bad.
You think you're past the point of crying about it. Your stomach hurts, you're cold, and most of all, you just want to go back to bed. Plus, although Mingyu sleeps like a log, you think he's developed a sixth sense for whenever you get up too early.
Time to be brave, you've been telling yourself, although you don't know who you're pretending for anymore.
So you nudge the front door open—it's so old, it wails if you come at it with any more force—and, to your surprise, see the light above the kitchen sink turned on.
It's not very bright, but it's enough to make out Mingyu's broad silhouette, back turned to you as he makes a cup of tea. He's humming one of his made-up songs.
"Mingyu?"
"There you are," he says, turning around. "Just came out to check on you. And make you some tea."
The kettle whizzes. Your gut twists.
You still haven't said anything to Mingyu. To manage your own disappointment was one thing—you don't think you could handle another person's. And yet when he stands there, Pororo mug between his huge hands, you feel as if you are holding a knife, big and guilty and bloody.
"I-I'm fine, Gyu. Honest." you watch his expression flicker, unreadable in the persimmon lamplight. "Sorry you had to come out. It's chilly out here."
"You know, you can tell me what's going on. I won't judge."
No, no, no. This is the last conversation you wanted to have, with the last person you wanted to have it with.
You feel feverish. You think your hands are shaking.
"Mingyu, I swear—"
"Whatever it is, we can fix it. I know we can."
That almost makes you want to laugh if you didn't want to cry so bad. Of fucking course he would say that. Mingyu, who treats life like it's the watermelon trick he showed you on the outlook, wants to put a bandaid on this whole thing, as if that could come close to fixing it.
He'd tell you to curl up on the couch with a bad movie while he orders takeout. Kiss you on the top of the head. It's ok, baby. Just another bad day for the person who has the worst luck in the world. Another lump of problems for him to try and make better. If he isn't sick of you now, he sure would be soon enough.
"It’s okay," you say, steeling your voice. "It really isn't a big deal. Let's just go back to sleep."
You try to walk away, but the hardness in Mingyu's eyes roots you down to the tile.
"Stop doing that."
"Doing what?"
"Pushing me away," he swallows. "Like you always do. I know something's going on."
"I’m not, i just—"
"You just what? You can't help it?"
"No, I—"
"Because you like to know that you can? That you can say whatever and then watch me come back?" A fragmented, heavy silence thrums between you. He's looking at you like he's daring you to say something, anything. His gaze is black. "What am I good for if you can't tell me anything?"
There's that familiar, stinging pressure behind your eyes. You think you're crying, but you're not sure. Maybe you've been crying this whole time.
"Fine," you bite. Your blood feels like hot metal. "You really wanna know? I didn't get into law school. There. Happy now?"
Mingyu looks stung.
"W-why didn't you tell me?"
Because I thought you would stop loving me. I thought you would have finally had enough.
"Because it's not all about you, Mingyu."
The words, selfish and damning, burn your tongue. Mingyu is right. This is what you always do. You fuck up and then make everyone else hurt for it.
"I'm sorry," Mingyu says. His voice doesn't sound like his. Instead, the words seem to hang in the air, trembling and holding their breath, waiting for an apology you can't give yet. "I shouldn't have—"
"It's ok." You swallow hard, and it hurts. "Let's just go back to bed."
It's getting colder and colder. You think there's a little hole in your sock, right above the cat's whiskers.
Mingyu doesn't reach for you as he passes to get to the hallway. Maybe he doesn't know how to anymore.
The Pororo cup is left abandoned on the counter. You walk over and read the label on the tea bag—barley, because you have class tomorrow morning.
You pick it up, let the ceramic buzz between your hands with whatever warmth it has left, and hold it to your lips.
It's cold now, but all you can think to do is drink it. Erase all the evidence that tonight ever happened, and maybe it'll be nothing more than a bad dream in the morning.
There's honey at the bottom of the cup. It sears the back of your throat, but you drink until there's nothing left.
vi. the peach blossoms (without fail, bloom every August. I miss you.)
You broke up the next day.
Even now, you remember what happened. You had woken up early that morning to make your own breakfast because you couldn't allow Mingyu to give you any more of himself. Your hands could only hold, shatter, so much.
"Mingyu, I think we should...." You looked at the zigzags of jam on your toast, angry and uneven. "I think we should stop seeing each other. For now," you had added, as if that made anything better at all.
Somehow that seemed more merciful at the time. Really, you think it just showed your cowardice. If you were going to break his heart, you might as well have gone all the way the first time.
Maybe it was a good thing that Mingyu saw right through you. He always did.
"So that's it, huh? You're just gonna give up on us?"
"No, I just...need some time."
"How long?" he asked. "Be honest with me. Because you know I’ll wait."
"I don't know." You couldn't meet his gaze. His eyes reached and reached over that kitchen table and you denied him even that.
"Don't you always know?" he asked, pitifully, desperately. "Don't you want this to work?"
And you did. In fact, you don't think you had ever wanted anything more, and it was that that scared you. You had already lost law school—you couldn't let the only other thing in your life let you go. So you pulled the trigger first.
"We should just end things. I'm sorry. I can't give you what you need."
He packed his bag within the hour, and you think everything, from then on, froze inside you. You didn't move from your seat until your parents came home from the airport later that day and asked why there were two plates of toast still on the table.
You think you knew, someplace, inevitably, this would happen. You, who only knew hunger, had reached deep inside Mingyu and rooted out a love you didn't think you were worthy of having. And yet you still ate from the vine, bite after guilty bite, until you couldn't take any more. The only time he asked you for anything at all, you couldn't give it to him—such was the irony of your relationship.
Maybe you were doomed the moment the first strawberry hit your tongue, just like you had said, all that time ago.
About a month later, you got another letter in the mail. Chungnam National University Law School, it read. This one was fat, in one of those brown envelopes lined with bubble wrap. Somehow, miraculously, that position on the waitlist had turned into an acceptance. You held the package to your chest and cried, loud and with abandon, as if taking a deep breath after almost drowning.
Ironically, the first person you wanted to tell was Mingyu. But the good news you needed to save your relationship came too little, too late. Perhaps that meant it had no legs to stand on in the first place, but that didn't stop you from missing it. Instead, you told Yizhuo, and she drove you to Jeju City and treated you to dinner. "You should just call him," she had said. "Hey, don't look at me like that. He'd probably pick up on the first ring."
The city is swathed in August's crimson summer—peach season. The narrow streets are lined with peach trees, the fruits glowing like fat drops of sunlight. All you do these days is plan for your eventual move to Daejeon and the start of a life that seems newer and shinier than your own. But surrounded by the cicada song, the velvet treeline, the rain-soaked asphalt, somehow you think you're going to miss Seogwipo more than you think.
(Fickle, fickle heart. You always needed things to be taken away to really be able to appreciate them. Somehow, all that wanting had boiled down to something more satisfying, more filling.)
You wonder how Mingyu is. Now that you think about it, he seems just as much a part of Seogwipo as the farm he lives on. It was only last summer when you had first met him in the field, set on fire by the strawberry harvest. You think about him now, peddling around that ridiculous wicker basket to make jam. Maybe talking to another pretty girl, someone as naive, cruel as you had been.
Not long ago, you considered calling him to apologize, but that'd just be another thing to be selfish about. A little time and some warm weather, and I’m calling to finally wash my hands of you. That's what it would sound like, no matter what you said. Still, it didn't stop you from thinking of him, every flower, every season.
"You know, I always wanted to grow peach trees. But I think we've always been a pear kind of family."
Mingyu. If a voice could cut through air, it'd be his.
You whip around, half-believing you're hearing things. Certainly that would be easier, but you're learning that there are some things you can't run from.
And like a picture, Mingyu stands tall, golden, framed by the peach blossoms. Not a thing about him has changed. Not even the way he looks at you.
"Mingyu," you breathe. Unfortunately, none of the times you replayed your last conversation with him help you come up with something to say, because in none of them did you anticipate him coming back. "W-what are you doing here?"
"I live here, silly."
"No way," you reply, scrambling. "Crazy, because I live here too."
You both laugh nervously, a silly, bubbly thing, but you feel like you're going to throw up. It's only now that you realize you're kind of on the walk to his place. Seogwipo has never had places to hide.
"I...um." You try and disentangle the guilt from the nostalgia from the scent of the peaches and the warmth on his face. They all look the same. You missed him. "I got into law school. In Daejeon."
"I heard," he says. "Not surprised at all. I always knew you would."
"Thank you. I mean it." The cicadas buzz around you, as if they know they have an important silence to fill. "You're staying in town, right?"
"Actually, I decided to apply to culinary school. It finally felt right, you know? I'm leaving at the end of the summer, but it's just in Jeju City. I couldn't leave the island."
"Thank goodness. I don't know if you could tell, but I kind of always hoped you would. I don't think I’ve ever eaten better food." Your voice wobbles, but it gets there. "You'll do amazing."
Then time stretches and forces you to recognize, reckon with, the moment you're in. You wonder if he feels the same way you do—bruised, overripe. If there's still a space in his heart for you.
Deep breath. Life only gives you so many chances.
"Mingyu, I’m sorry. I'm sorry I couldn't make us work. You deserved better." Saying it feels like peeling the skin of your heart back. There's still a palpable distance between the two of you—you think that had always been there—but it feels more comfortable in a way it never did before.
"Don’t apologize," he says, easily, as he always does. Everything seems to flow off him like water, and you think that's the part of him you loved the most because it was the one thing you couldn't touch. "We loved each other. I think that much was true."
A jasmine breeze curls through the trees, sending the blossoms fluttering around you like ink in water. The very first time you met Mingyu, you thought the image of him, haloed with the sunset, was the one you wanted to keep forever. And yet, somehow, you don't think you'll ever forget the way he looks right now.
"Will you ever come back to Seogwipo?" you ask.
"I was gonna ask you the same thing—you were always the one who wanted to get out of here." He grins, ear to ear. "Of course I'm coming back. There's nowhere I'd rather be."
"Yeah. I think I know what you mean."
The sea, the clay dirt, Mingyu. Even yourself, clumsy and care-worn. You think, somewhere along the line, you forgot how to love. But you're learning—one step at a time.
"Friends," you say. "Let's be friends. If you'll let me."
"Thought you would never ask. Gladly. Always." The space between you seizes, like it's holding in a breath. Maybe one day, you'll think of closing it once more, but you like where you stand now. You can admire him better from a distance, without your fingerprints all over him. He stuffs his hands in his pockets, something he does before he gets ready to leave. But before he does—"I'll see you soon, okay? You better come back. Promise me."
For the first time, you see the honesty in his eyes and you really, truly believe him.
"Promise."
The Seogwipo sun is high and red in the sky when you wave Mingyu goodbye. It feels like you're coming to an end of a long summer, but you're not afraid. You watch the wind dance through the peach blossoms, their branches never searching, never wanting, and you finally feel as if you've arrived home.
#literally on my hands and knees begging for the tags to work#mine#mingyu#mingyu x reader#mingyu x you#mingyu angst#seventeen angst#mingyu imagines
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I kid u fucking not, im genuinely tweaking thinking about the jjk men, specifically nanami and toji. the complete polarity between them drives me insane.
nanami would treat you like a complete and utter queen. craving something only available across town? he's already in the car the seconds the words leave your pretty little lips. period causing your day to be less than perfect? heat pads, comfort foods, blankets, candy- anything you need will be at your disposable. he's a good listener, affectionate, doting, understanding, mature, he is a MAN.
and do not let him know about your sexual needs. mans will (responsibly) drop whatever he's doing to come satisfy you. put that pussy on his nose, let his tongue trace the insides of your tight, gummy walls, he loves it more than you do. let him drill into that pussy until you're both on the brink of passing out with you mewling his name, how good he is, how deep he gets, how much you love his dick, he loves it wayyyy more than you do. ride him to your heart's content, sloppy licking and kissing into his mouth because you know why: he loves it more than you do. he'll make love to you every night if you'll let him, and I have an inclination you would. I mean, who'd wanna miss out on the sweet vulgarities he'd purr in your ear while he rearranges your guts?
"my pretty girl, takin' me so well." he'd huff into your ear. your legs splayed out near your torso as he has you in your all time favorite position: the wonderful mating press. "ah, God," nanami hissed, face pinching with overwhelming pleasure. "you're squeezing me, baby..gonna make me cum.." he'd lift his head where it was tucked away in the crook of your sweat-slicked neck, staring into your very soul with a dangerous mix of adoration and hunger. "want me to cum inside you, love? pump this pretty pussy f-full of my cum?"
You became his world and whatever his woman wants, she gets, no questions, no debate.
Toji, ohhhhhhhhhh TOji toji toji. He's my guilty pleausre, I swear to you. I've committed my heart, soul, and body, to nanami, I've claimed him as my jjk husband, BUT toji truly is my forbidden fruit. I have to fight actual demons not to imagine him pounding into me from behind, the side, upside down, up into me- in any way shape and form simply because feel like im being disloyal to Nanami :(
(mind you these are fictional men created by a Japanese sadist name Akutami Gege, I need to be committed to a mental institution at this rate)
AHEM, anyway, Toji is a blunt lover, and here's what I mean: (in my head) he may not be the best at communication or very good with his feelings, but he'll do his damndest to be upfront with you. he'll try his best to do what he thinks is best for y'alls relationship and with your help, he gets better at voicing how he feels. idgaf what you gotta say, he. will. spoil. you. yes, keeping money isn't something he's always been good at, BUT that all changed when he got with you. Mans made an entire savings account just for you. his money is your money basically; whatever you want is yours, no questions asked. he'd be your ride or die. no one gets to you without getting through that sexy, delicious, mountain of a man. he'll damned if he lets anyone even think about disrespecting his lady. he'll gladly rearrange their face, maybe even end their bloodline, if they're dumb enough to try. toji is...idk the hood nigga of jjk if u ask me, and if you think really hard, that's headcanon enough.
its one of the undisputed facts of the world that toji has that dawg in him. he will, happily, gladly, proudly, rearrange your insides, then give them a fresh paint job with his cum. he'd talk that nasty shit in your ear too while he's pounding you from behind.
"ohh, this pussy so good f'me, ma. so wet, so fuckin' tight....g'nna fuck 'er nice 'n good, maybe leave a baby in 'er too.” he'd growl, his tip bullying your g-spot at a punishing pace. "you'd like that, wouldn't ya?" he'd pull you back by your hair, keeping your back flush against his broad chest while his rough hand traveled down your navel so his thick fingers could torture your clit. "want a baby fucked into yer tight, nasty pussy. ohh im gonna fill you up baby. fill this perfect, fuckin' pussy..."
the forbidden fruit is toji fushiguro, you cannot change my mind.
this was mindless nanami and toji drabble because I need them, istg im tweaking bc maybe they aren’t so different…
#exploringlalalandꨄ︎#this was very self indulgent#might need to find my nearest psych ward after posting this#is it bad I want both of them at the same time?#jujutsu kaisen smut#jjk x reader#jjk drabbles#jjk imagine#jjk nanami#jjk toji#jujutsu kaisen toji#jjk x black reader#anime smut#jjk x you#jujustsu kaisen x reader#jjk smut
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Not a Goodbye...
But a shift.
I will not mince words, things are shit right now in the Pedro Pascal fandom.
For me though, nothings been the same since April. My notes DROPPED and never recovered. I'v been blocked by pages I never interacted with and people who used to be mutuals want nothing to do with me.
Things Ive been informed I've been blocked for is darking dark, using adult shoes in a header that everyone said were kids feet (they weren't), being Jewish so I must support genocide (im not im a hopeful convert and I've been very vocal about the genocide), supporting a terrorist organization and being anti semetic (I'm not, again, hopeful convert and I'm very vocal about anti semitism), fetishizing gay men as a "girl" (I am not a girl) etc.
It's just not fun anymore.
The Pedro fandom has given me a LOT. I've met many, many wonderful friends here who are just great people and friendships I hope last. Even ones that dont i value forever.
But i think my time here isn't what it once was. I feel safer and happier in the oscar issac side, or blogging about bruce springsteen, or star wars. I've decided to reshift my focus back to OScar Isaac/Triple frontier writing.
What will change?
Not a lot to start. In fact you might see even more P boy content at first! I have a few things I wanna finish writing. I need to finish blessed by the fruit, and a few WIPS i have, including super angsty Joel's
ROF will continue but Im gonna keep writing laregly TF fanfiction so that wouldn't change
You'll still see Frankie around as i love TF but it maybe more FishBen. Sorry to everyone who says I fetishize gay men ig
I might write more on characters around p boys. Tommy Miller, Steve murphy
And if I have an idea I love, if I wanna write it, I'll write it!
Currently I have 2 joel one shot wips i wanna get out
I deleted the tumblr app, I need to decompress. Im still here with my laptop when im at home, but less access. Just for a day or a few, nothing big.
I wanna work on my original works, including Mariposa and my TWW rewrite, stolen lullaby! I'll be posting less between that, the Zine, and this semester ill be in school full time and working full time plus part time.
follow @romana-updates to keep updated.
I love each and every person I've made friends with or interact with around this side of tumblr! If you dont wanna follow me due to lack of joel coming up, thats okay! I hope you had fun while you were here!
#roman personal posts#romana personal posts#ppcu#oi fandom#oscar isaac fandom#triple frontier#pedro pascal fandom
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Okay but pls feel free to ignore this I'm not creative but I love your writing
But I have an elderly sphynx (cat) and he's the love of my life, he gets cold so he wears jumpers and hats, and wants to be inside my clothes for warmth and is just an absolute baby, and sleep in my arms/in my hood honestly 24/7. He's like a small person he's so needy.
I can picture Joel getting home and pregnant reader has acquired one from someone, and the cat is her "practice" baby and she dresses him up and absolutely spoils him and carries him everywhere and Joel is just so baffled by what on earth is going on. BUT CANT QUESTION IT BECAUSE READER IS A MEANIE (as she should be) (mother knows best)
🩷🩷🩷
Sphinx cats are so cute oh my gosh!!! She would love him so much, subconsciously because she'd think it's like a little Joel when he would shave and be like "smooth—hairless—baby man" (which is subsequently the last he shaved fully).
Also can't believe youre gonna give such cute imagery but not even show us with a pic ugh devastating but ALAS. Here's how it would go:
- - - -
When Joel comes home, he usually expects one of two things: you're sleeping on the couch with some mixed fruit jelly smeared all over your mouth and between your tits, or you're throwing a plastic cup (because he pre-baby-proofed the house to avoid having any dangerous objects in YOUR grasp) at his head for opening the door the "wrong way" (how does one open a single sided hinged door the wrong way? He's still trying to figure it out).
So when he walks in the front door and hears excited little peeps from you from the bedroom, he's a little weary.
It's not till he's tossing his keys on the counter and hearing you say "you're such a handsome man" that Joel's heart stops.
There's no way. You wouldn't. Not now, not so fucking pregnant with his baby—
Oh fuck. Was it his baby? Or was it this "handsome man" in HIS house with HIS wife, canoodling in HIS bed!??
And how long? How long has this affair been going on under his roof? The entire time you'd be angry at Joel during your pregnancy, maybe you meant it? Maybe you were done with him, seeking something new and exciting?
When Joel finally rounds the corner, just one step away from the doorway, listening to your giddy gasps and rustling clothes, he doesn't know if he can bring himself to find out. Can only imagine a million things he's going to see, all of which are too painful to conceptualize.
He hears your excited giggles, closes his eyes, braces his heart, and walking in.
It takes him a second to register what he's looking at: there's no other man in here, but rather something tucked up in one of his old high school hoodies that you're wearing, backwards, with the hood hanging against your chest.
Then there's something moving in it, and he's almost scared you may have already had the baby and are suffocating it in the hood, though your belly is still very much full, so what—?
"Joel!" You shout, looking petrified as if you're caught in a scheme.
Before Joel can even speak up to ask what's going on, you're pulling what is possibly (from Joel's perspective, mind you) the ugliest pink squirmy ballsack out of his hoodie, complete with a skiny pale rat tail, big marble eyes and pointed ears.
"Meet Ramses!"
He drops his backpack at the door and stares. "What. Is that."
"I literally JUST said his name is Ramses." you scold, kissing the—thing— on the wrinkly folds of its forehead.
It starts purring affectionately, and it clicks.
"That's a CAT?" Joel shouts.
You can feel the poor thing curls up against you with tension at his booming voice.
Joel, please, lower your voice—"
"Where's its fur? No wait, why is it here? How did you get a cat? Who's cat is it? WHY do you have it??"
"Well Deanna next door had a family emergency in Connecticut and they had to fly out this morning, so I agreed we'd watch Ramses until they got back."
"Why is it naked? What did you DO to it?" Fucking hell, Deanna and George are going to have a field day to find you'd shaved their pet literally within 24 hours—
"That's the way it is. Never seen a sphinx cat before?"
Hes not really listening at this point. Joels heart rate had finally caught up with him as he kind of breathes a sigh of relief.
A cat. He thought you were having an affair with a cat.
"Isn't he sooooo cute!!!" You squeal with little jumpy feet.
But it's not cute. Not with the way it's looking at Joel, with its slitted murderous eyes and pointed claws clinging to you while it hisses at him.
"Why is it in my hoodie?"
"He's cold, damnit Joel even YOU noticed he's naked. Poor handsome baby needs all kinds of love, and sweaters, and warmth and—"
The little sucker is just eating it up, as you babble on about getting it jumpers, and baby socks, and cutting all of Joels sweaters up so it can rest on top of your belly, and a spot for it in the bed—
"The BED? NO. No ballsacks in the bed."
"He's SO much cuter than your HAIRY ballsack, Joel, which as far as tonight, can agree to those terms and sleep on the couch." You scoff him and hold Ramses to your chest, scratching his ears and kissing him as you shove past your husband.
-
Joel doesn't know what to do. Its one thing to agree to feed a cat every so often for a friend while they're out. It's something else entirely to be doing... what you've been doing.
There's a new amazon box in every hour with custom knitted cat sweaters and hats and ear muffs that you've gone off the reservation with just "needing" to keep warm, now full blown getting an outfit for every occasion. He hears you talking to it like a person, using a baby voice to tell him how handsome he looks, "like a wittle baby pharoh". Joel is tripping over all the cans of luxirous cat food youve been "testing" to find his desired taste. The man can't even get cuddles with you anymore because you're so god damn obsessed with swaddling Ramses in your clothes and softest blankets.
And it KNOWS. The damn cat KNOWS you've completely ignored your ever doting and pampering husband for it—while it does NOTHING but absorb your affection. You've craddled it against your every exposed piece of skin from sleeping across your neck to letting it rest atop your bump. Each time Joel tried to hug you, there's a quick hiss at him and low and behold there's the sleeping Ramses all nestled in HIS GODDAMN HOODIES (granted, that he gave you BUT STILL) wedged between your tummy and tits like a sauna, all curled up as youre talking to it like its a—
Oh my god.
"Are you... practicing—for the baby??"
You stop mid bounce of the kitty in your lap, wearing a matching knitted sweater to yours. "What! No! Thats—" but your eyes faulter to the cat who's just been helplessly going along with your toying. "No! Ramses is just a sweet little kitty who has NEEDS. Poor baby boy is so cold, he needs warmth of a —"
"Mother?"
"MAYBE."
Joel goes to sit down but the cat is giving him a less than inviting glare, so he slinks back to the other end of the couch. "Honey. I think you're taking the cat-sitting too far."
"NO Im not!" You cry. You clutch the poor baby close to you defensively. Why are you crying? I mean, you KNOW why--you're worried Joel is going to take your baby away from you—
Ooooooooooooooooooh. Oh fuck.
You stare at the little lump of skin curled up in your lap, with his collar that says "mommy's goodest boy" and realize how much Joel is definitely right...
Not that you'd EVER tell him that.
"No. You're wrong. I'm just being a fantastic neighbor. And you're being a shitty husband and not supporting me."
"That's a little too far—"
"And—" you interject. "Even if it WAS my baby practice. Which it isn't. You aren't being a very supportive father here either."
He sighs in defeat.
Can't argue there.
so when Deanna and George call to let you know they're going to be another week up North, you let them know Ramses is in good hands.
All true. Now that Joel had gained Ramses trust and had maneuvered the little guy in the new baby sling that you two could not figure out for months, you felt pretty confident in Joel's papa skills blossoming.
- - - -
Joel dealing with Preggo Wife masterlist
#joel miller fan fiction#joel miller x reader#joel miller x you#joel miller fanfiction#last of us fanfiction#joel miller#joel miller fic#joel the last of us#joel tlou#the last of us fanfiction#the last of us fic#tlou fanfiction#tlou fic#joel miller fluff#joel dealing with preggo wife
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The Wary Weretiger
"You know, I think therapy might be more effective than this." Said Atsushi. He didn't need to turn around to know Akutugawa was rolling his eyes.
"Shut up."
Atsushi raised his hand, catching the orange. "Huh, you even peeled it this time. Must be serious."
He wasn't exactly sure how they got here. Akutagawa had been hunting him down for his bounty.... And than one day just stopped. Somewhere along the lines this had become their routine.
Akutugawa ranted at him, Atsushi sat and ate whatever fruit he'd pick up on the way. Sometimes he'd voice his own opinion and Akutugawa would begrudgingly listen.
It was werid.
But not unwelcome.
It definitely beat having his leg cut off, that's for sure.
"Go on, out with it. I'm busy today." Akutugawa scoffed "and what could you be possibly busy with." Atsushi shrugged "well I still need to get a job."
It didn't matter how much he saved from what he stole from the Orphanage, it wouldn't last him much longer.
"I thought the Agency offered you a position." Said Akutugawa, carefully. As kind as Atsushi was he fought like a caged beast. He could and would ditch Akutugawa if the other offended him.
And Akutugawa didn't want to admit he liked his company.
Atsushi took a bite out of an orange slice "only because of my ability. They're nice people, but I'll find a job myself. Besides that would you my enemy and I am not dealing with that."
His leg would grow back but it was painful. And being on Akutugawa's not bad side was a nice place to be.
Not that Atsushi would admit it.
Akutagawa nodded, he could respect wanting to keep your pride even when you were at rock bottom. But even soo... "Is it so bad for them to want you for your ability?"
Atsushi paused.
"My whole life people have only wanted my ability. They've tried to rip it out of me because they felt entitled to it.... Do you really think I'd want to join an organisation that values it so highly?"
There was an edge to his tone, but also sadness. Akutugawa's eyes went wide in shock.
He unconsciously tugged his coat closer. He wouldn't know what to do if Rashomon was stolen from him.
Akutugawa felt vulnerable just taking a bath, he couldn't imagine how Atsushi felt feeling his ability get ripped out of his skin. It was fortunate that it clearly failed.
It certainly explained Atsushi's distrust of both light and dark.
"I suppose not." Said Akutugawa, going quiet in thought. He went back to his initial question.
"I was once in a situation like yours. I lived in the slums, it was there Dazai found me and I joined the Port Mafia. That became my purpose, and I'm lost without it. But you... You don't have that, and yet you seem satisfied."
Atsushi hummed, thoughtful. "I'm gonna say something, but right or wrong you're not allowed to stab me again."
Akutagawa scoffed.
"I stabbed you one time, stop acting like it was such a big deal.... But very well, I won't stab you."
Atsushi turned to face Akutugawa, putting his orange slices back into a tupperware box. "That isn't your purpose."
Akutagawa is taken aback. He wants to argue but something in him stops him. The way Atsushi spoke to him now was different to how he usually does.
He sounded like Dazai.
Dazai in the quiet moments, the rare moments when Akutugawa hadn't failed him. The all seeing look in his eye as he read Akutugawa like an open book.
"You had a purpose, one you cherished like a second soul. But you lost it. You tried to convince yourself whatever you consider your purpose now is it, but it isn't. And it never will be."
And yet when Atsushi spoke it was kind. It wasn't intended to tear Akutugawa down, quite the opposite. And Akutugawa found himself unable to look away.
"... How do you know this?"
Atsushi smiled, it was small and sad and it didn't fit him like his usual grin did. "You wouldn't be trying so hard to find your purpose if you truly believed you found it."
He looked away, giving Akutugawa some privacy in his own thoughts. "Ask yourself, who were you before the Port Mafia? Who were you back when you were like me? There's you're answer."
Akutagawa frowned, deep in thought. He'd been... He'd been weaker and pitiful. A small child who killed whoever went in his way, but killing hadn't changed in his life.
He was the Port Mafia's Rabid dog, he was still a killer so that wasn't it.
What had he been killing for? In the Port Mafia it was because those were his orders. Because the weak needed to be destroyed to make way for the strong.
Back in the slums it had been for survival. Akutugawa would've died many times over if he'd let those idiots survive. And Gin wouldn't have survived of he hadn't protected her from them.
Akutagawa froze.
... That's what it was. He had been a protector, his reason for killing down in the slums was to protect Gin and his friends.
His friends who were killed on the night Dazai found him... The night Akutugawa lost his purpose and tried to gain another.
But failed.
"I can't get it back." Whispered Akutugawa, suprised that he choked up at the thought. He hadn't thought of them in years.
"You can" Said Atsushi, looking at him again. "The circumstances may have changed, but the core premise is the same. You just have to open yourself up to that."
Open himself up? So Akutugawa had to find something else to protect? That... Didn't seem so hard, given the Port Mafia protected the city from the shadows. And Gin was still with him.
Had it really been infront of him, all this time?
"That's the difference between us" said Atsushi, quietly but Akutugawa caught it. "You had a purpose only to lose it. While I have never had one."
Atsushi chuckled and it was sad again and Akutugawa hated it. He preferred when Atsushi was genuinely happy. When his smile reached his eyes, his eyes that were kind and shined with light.
Now they looked so empty, so sad.
"You think I'm satisfied but I'm not. I have no dreams, no aspirations, my worth is tied entirely to my ability. I live to spite all those that want me dead, to stop them from taking the tiger if I pass on. I have no purpose, not really."
Akutugawa didn't know what to say, all he could do was nod in goodbye when Atsushi left.
He reached down, picking up the half of orange Atsushi saved for him. That he always saved for him, no matter how hard times got.
"You're wrong" he said to the wind as he walked away. "You're so much more than you're ability."
#When you're Atsushi AU has an akutagawa essay in it#The Wary Weretiger#bungou stray dogs#bsd#bsd atsushi#atsushi nakajima#bsd akutagawa#akutagawa ryuunosuke#Bsd sskk#But they haven't realised it yet
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i dunno if this has been asked before, but i kinda wanted to splurge a little bit.
how and where does azure lion and the other animal celestials play a part in the BEW au? or even TAB AU. my personal idea on it could be that azure uses reader kind of as leverage against wukong, while as in TAB maybe reader is used to cause a rift between the brothers so that azure has an easier time murking wukong.
alright, so. the big bad brotherhood. they mostly just play the part of extra soldiers and sovereigns in wukongs conquests, his own little war council. im gonna go with the idea that the betrayal hasn't happened, since wukong doesn't get recruited by heaven in the base versions of these aus
(ive said before that, at least in bad end, the brotherhood wouldn't bother with reader too much. buuuut i don't think i specified what they're like in TAB and their reaction to their comrades marrying reader.)
peng (the bitch) doesn't much care for reader. they wonder why the all-powerful wukong is bothering with a human. they likely make a snide comment or two when wukong first introduces her to them at a meeting, which wukong (and macaque) immediately shut down with threats of violence. mac especially doesn't tolerate peng being an ass to his wife; his hatred for the winged menace is potent. luckily the bird demon is catty, not stupid; and surprisingly, they learn to keep their beak shut about their leader's wife. this leads to them largely ignoring her. reader doesn't like them much either, but tries to be polite.
yellowtusk feels pity for reader. he knows she didn't exactly become queen of flower fruit mountain willingly, and believes that she would be happier with other humans. but he's not called "wise" for nothing; he won't be lifting a finger to help her. even as strong as he is, he knows he stands no chance against the two simian warlords. regardless, he's polite to reader and will speak with her about the various topics that she's read about. he's a surprisingly good conversationalist.
demon bull king is ambivalent towards reader. he knows what it's like to want someone outside your station, so he doesn't say anything negative to wukong about it. he'll speak to reader if she speaks to him, and is overall polite (seeing as she is technically a queen and he has a lot of respect for wukong), if not very gruff when doing so.
azure lion is the only one who would be actively kind to reader, the only one who would speak with her like a true equal. despite his status as a once-celestial soldier, demonic sovereign, and a general of the infamous monkey kings' demon army...he still has a soft spot for mortal civilians. if a platoon of the monkey king's army is passing through, one would hope that he's leading it. less innocent blood is spilt when the lion general is at the helm.
its because of this that he was concerned when wukong introduced reader to him. what was a human doing on flower fruit mountain? she's married to the monkey king? she seemed...very uncomfortable in the presence of her husband. the lion demon knows that she was likely frightened by the two monkey warlords' use of "demonic courting tactics" and introduced himself gently. the fact that she responded to him (considering his size and appearance) without too much hesitancy, was able to bow politely and look him in the eyes despite all she'd likely been through at the hands of his brothers–he couldn't help but admire her bravery.
azure is aware that his sworn simian brothers are unconventional in many aspects of their life, so the fact that the two of them would marry a human (the same human, no less) isn't too surprising. the two are of one mind, and azure has made a tentative peace with the ruthless way his brothers conduct their business.
...but he can't help but feel sympathy for reader. she didn't choose this life for herself, though he can see the lingering affection she has for wukong and macaque. and once he gets to know her (an occasional talk outside the council room while the warlords are busy discussing strategy, a close seating at a banquet, or during a party on the mountain), azure begins to understand why they chose this woman. a fondness grows in his heart for the quiet human who is kind to him despite knowing what he's done.
he won't say it aloud, but...had it been him who'd been found and tended to by reader, azure couldn't be sure he wouldn't have made the same choice as his brothers.
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SR Riddle Rosehearts - Beach Wear Vignette
Riddle: Hm…?
Riddle: It's rather refreshing to be woken up by the sound of lapping waves. And the others are…
Everyone: Snooore… Zzzzzz…
Riddle: It looks like they're all still asleep. …Well, since I'm awake, I suppose I'll step outside for some air.
[Uninhabited Island – Beach]
Riddle: The ocean stretches on forever. This doesn't feel real at all, but we really are stranded here…
Riddle: I wonder if Trey, Cater and the others have started to worry? What about my mother…?
Riddle: …
Lilia: Why're you just gazing off towards the ocean like that, is something wrong?
Riddle: Oh, Lilia-senpai. No, not really…
Riddle: My daily routine every morning was to wake up before all my other dormmates and patrol the dormitory, before ironing my shirts.
Riddle: Ever since coming here, I haven't needed to do either. That's why I'm not sure what I should do.
Lilia: It's good that you're so studious. But I think it'd be fine if you relax a little and enjoy the moment, too.
Riddle: Relax, you say… Even if you were to tell me that, it's difficult to bring myself to waste my time doing absolutely nothing productive.
Lilia: Hm, I see. I guess that's very much like you… OH, I GOT IT!
Lilia: I had a great idea. After we all eat breakfast, do a quick patrol and gather more provisions, we should meet back here on this beach!
Riddle: What do you plan on doing?
Lilia: That's for you to see later. Kufufu!
Lilia: ―So, here we have it, folks!
Lilia: THE FIRST EVER SUMMER BEACH FLAG TOURNAMENT BEGINS NOW~~!!
Riddle: Beach Flags… They say this competition originated from the training that surf lifesavers did.
Riddle: The runners would lay face down on the starting line with their backs towards the flags, and upon the given signal, would run towards the flags.
Riddle: If I recall, the rule was that there was one less flag than the number of runners, and the one who could not capture a flag would be eliminated.
Lilia: You know your stuff, have you done it before?
Riddle: It was the theme of a crossword that was in the appendix of one of my study materials. So I do have some knowledge of it, however I've never tried it…
Lilia: This isn't just a game. We are all stranded on a deserted island in the middle of the ocean… There's no telling when we could all fall prey to danger.
Lilia: So basically, we'll use this sport to train ourselves, both mentally and physically. However…
Lilia: Since it wouldn't be fun just running, I've prepared for everyone a rather splendid prize! The winner will get...
Lilia: Floyd's Super Deluxe ☆ Special Fruit Parfait!
Everyone: PARFAIT!?
Ace: I totally didn't wanna run, but… I definitely want to eat that super deluxe parfait!
Azul: Floyd's excellently whipped-up creations may be great additions to the Mostro Lounge menu…
Jack: I don't really care about parfaits, but… There's no way I can let myself lose in a competition.
Floyd: Aha! What, you all think you're gonna get to dig in? Obviously, I'm gonna be the winner!
Riddle: A parfait! …Ahem. If this is to be training, I shall have to focus up properly.
Grim: I wanna eat the parfait already! Lilia! Let's get this show on the road!
Stitch: Yeehaw!
Lilia: Everyone's so fired up! Alright, let's begin! Reaaaaaadddyyy…
[blows whistle]
[Uninhabited Island – Beach]
Everyone: RAAAAH!!
[CRAAAASH!!]
Riddle: A-Ack!? Everyone just dove at the sand face first!? You're all covered in sand. Are you alright, Ace!?
Ace: The sand's real smooth, so I'm totally fine. 'Sides, Beach Flags is just supposed to be for fun, anyway.
Riddle: Eh, you're enjoying being covered in sand!?
Lilia: The lifesaver's mission is, just as they're called, to save lives. In order to do that, they must be prepared to fly towards the target without any hesitation.
Lilia: Therefore, it wouldn't be wrong to say that diving into the sand with great vigor is just another rule of this competition! It can be a necessity in times of emergency!
Riddle: It's a rule!? I-I understand. If it is a rule, then I shall also jump forth.
Ace: …Was there actually a rule like that in Beach Flags?
Lilia: This is more fun… I mean, more exciting. Alright, we're starting the next round!
[blows whistle]
[running, sliding]
Riddle: I captured a flag! Oh… Right, I was supposed to dive into the sand. Hup!
Floyd: Goldfish-chan, that's hilarious that you're just flopping yourself into the sand after you grabbed a flag! You make no sense!
Riddle: W-Well, I can't figure out how to slide.
Floyd: You just gotta go for it, like how you'd jump into the water. Like, this!
Riddle: What are you even saying? When entering a body of water, you need to first shower yourself with the water, let your body get used to the temperature, and step in one foot at a time!
Lilia: Hrrm, he's a hard-headed one. ALRIGHT, NEXT!
[blows whistle]
Riddle: This time, I'll definitely get it right… HIYAH!
Azul: Wha―! Riddle-san just slid into the goal and grabbed the flag with his foot!?
Riddle: I concluded that it is more difficult to dive into the sand face first. There is no rule against capturing the flag with your feet, now is there?
Ace: I mean, it's technically not against the rules, or anything… But shouldn't that actually be harder to do!?
Lilia: Alllright, it's really starting to heat up! Next!
[blows whistle]
Lilia: After so many bouts of fiery competition that could dry up a whole ocean… Finally, we come to the championship round! The two remaining contestants are…
Lilia: Jack, the supernova of the track and field club, who has been capturing the flags with his beautiful running posture and spirited diving!
Lilia: And Riddle, the rose-red ruler of Heartslabyul who has somehow continued to win, despite never successfully diving into the sand!
Lilia: Any comments from the rest of you, who have all been eliminated while trying to sabotage and drag each other down?
Ace: I mean, I don't think even my Housewarden'll be able to beat Jack…
Azul: There is an overwhelming difference in physical stature. And since magic is forbidden, he may not have much of a chance to win.
Grim: Both of you do your best~! And then give me a bite of your parfait when you win~!
1. Do your best, you two! 2. Share your parfait with meee~!
Lilia: Kufufu… No one can predict what may happen. Monsters lurk everywhere on this summery beach.
Floyd: …Hmm~? Those shells by Sea Urchin-chan's feet… Are those…
Lilia: Alright, here we go! Both of you get ready… Seeeet!
[blows whistle]
Jack/Riddle: RAAAAH!!
[rustle, rustle]
Jack: Ack, what's happening!? All the shells around my feet are starting to move… Were these hermit crabs that were hiding under the sand!?
Riddle: HAAAAH!
[CRAAASH!]
Floyd/Lilia: HE FINALLY DOVE IN FACE FIRST―――!
Azul: The sand is flying everywhere… Such momentum! Does he not know what moderation means?
Riddle: …Bleagh! Cough, cough! Th-There's sand all in my mouth… But, I finally was able to dive into the sand!
Riddle: And I captured the flag! Yes! I won! Did you see that, Ace!?
Ace: Yeah, yeah, I saw you, Housewarden. Gooood job!
Ace: Maaan. Look at him covered in sand and jumping for joy… If any of our dormmates saw this, they'd flip their lids.
Jack: That was due to the course being faulty! I demand a remat… Meh, I guess it's ridiculous to get worked up over a silly game like this.
Jack: I guess having the hermit crabs jump in is just another part of it being summer.
Floyd: Mmkay, so to our winning Goldfish-chan, here's Floyd's Super Deluxe Special Fruit Parfait ♪
Lilia: And for the rest of the participants, you'll get a special sundae for your valiant efforts! Let's all go eat!
Everyone: YAAY! HOORAY!
Riddle: This is the first time I've ever been covered in this much sand. But… Heh, this isn't too terrible.
Stitch: Ehe!
Riddle: Ah, hey! Stitch! This is my parfait! If you try to snatch it from me, it will be off with your head!
Stitch: Yahahaha!
Requested by @dida-books.
#twisted wonderland#twst#riddle rosehearts#ace trappola#jack howl#azul ashengrotto#floyd leech#lilia vanrouge#twst riddle#twst ace#twst jack#twst azul#twst floyd#twst lilia#twst grim#twst stitch#twst translation#twst lost in the book with stitch#mention: trey#mention: cater
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I would love to have a King x reader (female reader if you are ok with that) where the reader is a mythical zoan type very similar to Kaido’s mythical zoan but because it was a fruit made by Dr Vegaounk, the reader ends up with a dark green dragon instead. King’s just infatuated with the reader and the reader knows it but won’t say anything. The reader is fairly new to the Beast Pirates and Kaido puts King in charge of making the reader feel welcome. Thanks in advance if you are able to do this!!
Imagine having a dragon smile fruit
This led me down an interesting line of thought. How would King act around his crush. He's a deeply traumatized individual, but he hides it well. King has like zero emotional intelligence, he never learned how to really deal with them. Also, I'm making the reader around the same size as King for reasons.
This ended up being kinda long.
Kaido: I'm told you have a devil fruit.
You: it's a smile fruit, sir, Dr. Vegapunk made it for me.
Kaido: Vegapunk *casts a glance at king, but can't see his emotions due to that damn mask* when did he make it for you?
You: a few years back upon my request, he owed me a favor.
Kaido: may I see?
You: we'll need to go outside, I would hate to destroy your lovely house.
Kaido: Ookay?
Outside
You: *transforms into a large emerald green dragon with pitch black fur, talons, and horns.*
Kaido: Worororo, we're gonna be unstoppable!
King: ( ��0💖 ) !!
You: So I can get settled in?
Kaido: yes, Queen! Get their rooms ready, put them in the east wind of my castle.
You: absolutely not, I refuse to work with Queen, he's annoying.
Queen: EHH! Annoying! Who are you calling an idiot, you moron. You wanna go! *Starts to climb up on one of the coils of your body*
You: *flicks him off* And loud.
Queen: *skips like a rock over the ocean towards mainland Wano and disappears with a twinkle*
Kaido: Would you prefer Jack?
You: Jack is too unpredictable, plus I'm not a fan of the baby bangs he's sporting, they make me wanna bully him. King seems tolerable though, he's quiet which is preferable if I have to deal with a man.
King: 😱💢
Kaido: Very well, wouldn't want you to lose your temper and kill one of them. I need all three of them... well actually with you here, I might not.
You: I don't want a position of responsibility, those usually come with a lot of paperwork. I want money, food, a place to crash, and to fight, and when I’m not doing any of those to lounge in comfort.
Kaido: and you shall have anything you desire. King take them to the Black Tortoise wing.
King: I think they'd appreciate the views and quiet of the Blue Halls in the Vermilion Bird wing. You yourself once told me your dragon enjoys the open sky.
Kaido: how thoughtful King, to share your Vermilion Bird wing with our new recruit.
King: such a valuable member of the crew deserves the best we have to offer, especially one with a power so similar to your own.
Kaido: then can I trust them to you?
King: Of course.
The next day
King: how are you liking the Blue hall? Is it to your liking?
You: It's almost perfect, it just needs some personal touches.
King: I'll set up an appointment for our artisans to come over to receive instructions on what you want.
You: don't you have an assistant for that?
King: no? Are you volunteering?
You: hmm, only when I'm bored.
King: very well, in the meantime care to join me for a training session in the gym? *Hoping to show off his strength and physique for you*
You: Sure, let me change into something more breathable.
At the gym
King: would you spot me?
You: sure?
King: *lifting way more weight than he usually does while trying to keep his face as neutral as possible.*
You: *not sure how you'd be of any help to him if he actually needed help*
Queen: *leans over to Jack to shit talk* is it me, or is that feather-brained idiot trying to impress the newbie?
Jack: Yeah, he's even puffing up his wings and fire to make himself appear bigger.
Maria: right? And you you see the way he looks at them.
Queen: he's clearly displacing his affections for Kaido on them, probably they're more attainable to him than Kaido.
Kaido: *leans in* he's just not my type what can I say? Although, he does have those big titties like I like.
You: I'm gonna go get a water bottle, you want one?
King: sure *waits for you to leave before turning to his crew members* what the fuck are you jack asses whispering about over there?
Queen: You like (y/n) right?
King: what? No, they just got here, I don't even know them.
Kaido: she doth protest too much, methinks.
King: ugh, you all are seeing things.
Maria: yeah, we see you making bedroom eyes at (y/n).
Queen: Don't act like you're not, look at yourself, you're all puffed up like you're a horny teenager all over again.
King: *flattens his feathers* shut up dickhead.
You: *comes back in the room* I got us a few waters!
King: *puffs up again and realizes they're right.
Yamato: *peaking out from one of the floorboards* that explain why he wanted them in the Vermilion Bird wing with him.
King: *Puts his foot on the board and pushes it down*
That evening after dinner
Kaido: did we really upset you earlier? You seem like you're still... huffy like you were in the gym.
King: I'm disgusted with myself for being attracted to a human.
Kaido: *nods his head empathetically* I know the feeling bud. From what information that I have gathered about them, they seem like a decent human. They were once instrumental in the escape of a slave rebellion in the Ballywood Kingdom and Vodka Kingdom. Both of which were predominately composed of non-humans.
King: really?
Jack: yeah, they came to us through a recommendation of one of contacts in the Ryugu Kingdom.
You: wha'cha talking about?
King: *puffs up and feels his embarrassment and panic well up in his chest* Nothing!
You: *squints at him in suspicion* Really? Because I don't believe you.
King: Are you calling me a liar?
You: I ain't callin' you a truther, big man. Now spill the beans, what were y'all whispering about?
King: *his heart flutters happily when you call him 'big man' * Kaido told us you helped in some slave rebellions.
You: Oh yeah, I have quite a few tales from that time of my life.
King: If we're going to work together we should know more about you. So if you wouldn't mind, could you tell us those stories?
Kaido: *subtly gives him an encouraging slap on the back and a wink*
Queen: *whispers* fuckin' simp!
King: *makes Queen's cigar erupt in fire*
List of Up-and-coming works
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#one piece#one piece x reader#one piece imagine#king the wildfire#king the conflagration#king the wildfire x reader#king the conflagration x reader#beast pirates#animal kingdom pirates#kaido#kaido one piece#queen the plague#jack the drought#black maria#yamato#one piece yamato#from the depths of the dragon's hoard#tma original#9/5/23#no beta we die like men
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Breathe
Words: 1.2k
Request from these NSFW prompts: 65. “I know baby, I know. I’m right here, just breathe” // and this ask I received which I’ve copied below // sorry it’s short and a bit crap I’m struggling to write new stuff at the moment xxx
I was thinking a really intense session with Van, like say you’ve just had a really shitty day and want a release and Van just wants to take care of you and distract you. Properly pin you down and have a safe word and everything, and you’re nearly going into subspace, crying at the pleasure and he’s just hovering above you one hand on your cheek getting him to focus on him while he makes you cum again and again and again.
Imagines Masterlist Main Masterlist
Van was a perfectionist and very thorough in everything that he did, so when you approached him that evening in your melancholy mood, telling him that you wanted to forget all about your stresses and your woes just for one night, he was only too eager to try and help obliterate those troublesome worries from your overwrought mind...
"I know you got one more in you babe. Just breathe through it, c'mon... focus on me. You feel unbelievable."
He's hovering over you, slick with sweat, pumping into you at a maddening pace, doggedly determined in his endeavour to fuck every last scrap of worry out of your head, just like you'd begged him to.
You've lost track of how many times he's made you come, how many times he's built up your pleasure nice and slow, hot sticky waves of euphoria that mount and mount uncontrollably until he tips you carelessly over the edge into a void of mind-shattering bliss.
He'd started off using his fingers and tongue, probing into every wet inch of you, spreading you wide so he could take his fill, pinning your juddering body down as you'd bucked and whined helplessly beneath him. Now he's fucking into you slow and deep and steady, your cunt so wet and swollen like an over-ripe fruit, dripping with the sweetest nectar that he'd coaxed from you time and time again until you thought you might shatter into a million pieces.
"I can't... I don't think I can... not again... please... oh god please..."
Your words are stuttered and choked, punctuated by pitiful whines and gasps, your head lolling from side to side on the sweat dampened pillow as heat churns in your core like molten lava. Despite your impassioned pleas your legs are still wrapped tightly around his slim hips, heels pressed into the small of his back, keeping him close.
It's your overstimulated body that's begging him for mercy, your hips trying to instinctively retreat from his insistent thrusts as your body shudders uncontrollably. Your mind's on another page entirely, the dark and twisted part of you that relishes being completely under his control. He knows this of course, it's the reason you have a safe word for occasions like this.
"You're doing so good for me love," he praises, soft and sweet, words like honey oozing into your pleasure-saturated mind. "You're so fucking pretty like this... but we can stop if it's too much? What colour are you? It's important you tell me... green or red?"
He's braced above you with his elbows on either side of your head, your writhing body pressed into the mattress by his body weight, his lust laden gaze never faltering as it bores into yours.
"G... green," you stammer, tears pricking at your lashes and blurring your vision. You whimper as his hips snap up against yours, driving his cock even deeper, his pelvis grinding deliciously against your over-sensitive bud.
"That's my good girl," he cooes down on you, a hand raising up to stroke tenderly over your hot, tear-stained cheeks. "You feel so good. Always so perfect f'me."
You're sure his favourite place to be in the whole world is right between your spread thighs, and you wouldn't have it any other way. He's addictive. No matter how much he gives you, you always want more. And he's always willing to give.
"You gonna come all over my cock pretty girl? Wanna feel you let go for me one more time."
You eagerly nod, and his hand drops back down to curl around the crook of your leg which he presses upwards between your two bodies, spreading you even wider for him.
"Ahh... fuck," you gasp, the new angle punching the breath from your lungs at every thrust, the friction on your tender clit sore but blissful, mind-numbingly so.
You're beautiful like this he thinks, skin hot and flushed, sticky with the heat of your arousal, eyes wide and glossy, unfocused and brimming with tears. It's all because of him, and he can't get enough of that fact, an arrogant smirk stretching wide on his lips when you whine like you can't take any more. He wishes he could take a snap-shot of you like this and commit it to memory forever.
"Van... please," you croak out, your voice hoarse and cracked, not even sure what you're begging for.
You're in danger of becoming totally lost, incapable of any coherent thoughts apart from the dizzying pleasure that soaks your fucked out brain. The air around you is a furnace, chokingly thick and sticky, heady with the scent of sex. The sharp slap of his hips clashing with yours and the obscenely soaked sound of your sopping pussy fill your ears. It heightens everything, your mind spinning away to a hazy realm of pure sensation. And he's right there with you, ever watchful and ever mindful, guiding you through each high, not letting you lose your focus.
"I know, baby, I know. I'm right here, just breathe. Look at me... don't close your eyes now. I wanna see you... stay with me."
And at that moment you feel the coil in your core snap once again, a raw groan spilling from your lips as bright white stars burst across your field of vision, your pussy fluttering and clenching around him, squeezing him tight. Every muscle in your body tenses and shakes, your finger-nails digging tiny furrows deep into the skin of his back. You cry out his name again, hear him hiss out curses as he finds his own release, his expression creased in euphoria.
"Fucking hell, that was unreal," he groans as his hips finally stutter to a stop, his eyes dark and hungry as he looks down at you in awe. He untangles himself from your limb so he can cup your face in his hands, thumbs gently brushing away your tears. "Love you so much babe. Are ya okay? Are ya feeling better now?"
He eyes you carefully as he gently shunts his hips back to slip out of you. His skin's all tacky and sticky with sweat as his body slides over yours and he pauses, hovering there again, his gold chain dangling in the space between you and catching the dim lamplight as it twirls.
"Mmm..." you hum dreamily, catching the small semi-circular pendant between your fingers as you gaze up at him, sleepy and hazy-eyed, satisfied and worn in a way that you feel your limbs might melt into the comforting softness of your mattress. "So much better. Can't even remember what I was feeling stressed about in the first place now if you must know."
He chuckles at that, hair all shaggy and mussed, falling messily around his handsome face. "It wasn't too much for you then?"
"Maybe I like it when you're too much."
"Oh really? You want more then? Because that's a service I can certainly provide." He leans over to kiss you and his eyes are heavy-lidded and glazed when he pulls back. He looks inebriated… woozy… drunk on love.
"You're not actually serious are you?"
Your voice comes out high-pitched in disbelief as you look up at him, watch the slow, teasing smile spread on his lips.
"Never been more serious babe. You know how it goes when it comes to you... you know I'm up for anything. Anything that you need... I'm yours any time you want.”
#breathe#catb imagines#van mccann x reader#van mccann fanfic#van mccann blurb#fanfic#vanfic#van mccann#smut
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