#i think he loved going camping in part because he got so many comfy sleeping bags to lie on when we got home and dried them out

[abirddogmoment]

he would see a fabric on the floor and say oh is anyone sitting on that? no? don't mind if i do

[babymetaldoll]

Stargazing (Spencer Reid/Reader)

Requested: No, but I needed some hardcore fluff

Summary: The team is “forced” to go camping, and Spencer finally decides to make “his move” on Reader.

Pairing: Spencer Reid/ Reader

Category: Hardcore fluff

Warnings: Zero

Word count: 3,2K

Masterlist

-

-

It was the first time the BAU didn't argue Strauss's decision. She had walked into the conference room and explained to the team that the FBI had decided each department had to do a workshop related to teamwork and trust.

- "You will spend this weekend camping together. You will be part of a Team-Building Training Workshop"- Strauss wasn't excited about the idea of her best team wasting a whole weekend. But she was glad her department didn't have to do the activity. She hated camping.

- "Are you telling me we have to spend our weekend in sleeping bags, singing kumbaya?"- Rossi raised an eyebrow and looked at Erin, and she didn't move a muscle- "I'm out."

- "David, I'm not asking you if you want to do it. The whole team has to be part of this activity, that includes you."

- "Come on, Rossi,"- Prentiss smiled and tried to cheer him up- "It will be a nice change from catching serial killers for a weekend.

- "Really, Emily?"- Rossi crossed his arms on his chest and looked at Reid- "Hey, kid. How many dead bodies are found each year in the woods in the country?"

- "Over 2.543 last year,"- Spencer answered. And didn't stop talking, of course- "We can not be sure they were all serial killer related cases. The most common ways to die in the woods are drowning, car accident, and suicide."

- "Suicide it is."- David whispered. He knew it was going to be a long weekend.

Even when he wasn't a person who loved camping and outdoor activities, Spencer was excited to spend the weekend with the team, especially with (Y/N). His teammate, best friend, and secret crush. Ok, it wasn't really a secret.

Of course, everybody knew about Spencer's feelings. He never successfully hid them from the team. You didn't need to be a profiler to notice each time (Y/N) walked into a room, Reid's eyes would follow her, and his cheeks blushed. When they sat together in the jet, Spencer would always be too self-aware of his own movements. He would try not to move, especially when she had fallen asleep, resting her head on his shoulder. And when they were working on a case together, he would always cover her on the field, and he would make sure she was safe, even when the unsub was already caught.

He loved her. Even a blind man could see. Except for (Y/N), of course. Because according to her own words: "There's no way Spencer Reid is in love with me. He would never look at me that way. He is perfect, and I'm a mess. He deserves the perfect genius girl."

-

- "Ok, Romeo, this weekend is the perfect opportunity for you to make your move"- Derek and Reid were alone in the SUV on their way to the retreat.

- "Sure. Because there's no better time to make a fool out of myself than in front of all my friends in the middle of nowhere."

- "What's with the attitude, pretty Ricky? Relax"- Morgan frowned and put on some music, singing along for a moment. Reid looked at him and raised an eyebrow, trying not to laugh.

- "Ok man, picture this: you, your pretty lady, in the middle of the night, gazing at the stars together, alone in the middle of the forest. The full moon is the only light."

- "Who are you? since when are you a romance expert?"

- "Hey! I can be romantic!"

- "I've seen you get girls only by raising an eyebrow"- Reid argued, and he was right. It had happened once, but that was another completely different story.

- "What I'm trying to tell you is that you have the perfect chance to tell her how you feel during this trip"- Spencer was about to start debating that idea when Derek continued.

- "And stop saying she has no feeling for you!"

Reid bit his tongue and looked at the road. Neither of them said a word for the next couple of minutes. Until Spencer whispered

- "But she doesn't"

- "She does!!"- Derek nearly yelled

- "Why are you so sure?!"

- "Because she told Penelope she is in love with you!!"

The silence in the car was as intense as the red in Spencer's cheeks. Derek knew he shouldn't have said that, but he was tired of seeing his best friend's sad eyes each time he stared at (Y/N). Someone had to do something, and he knew neither of them would make the first move.

- "Are you sure?"- Reid's mouth was hanging open- "I mean, maybe she was joking."

- "No, she was honest. So please, this weekend, make your freaking move."

-

How could Spencer ever make his move? He had no idea. He didn't even have a "move"! But something inside of him felt a little more confident now.

That didn't show on the outside at all, 'cos during the whole day, he was more clumsy than ever. He dropped his coffee. He failed the first two attempts to set up his tent and nearly fell carrying logs for the fire.

He wanted to dig a hole and hid.

But (Y/N) didn't notice any of that. Not because she didn't pay attention, but because she was oblivious to any of those things. She just couldn't stop staring: He was wearing jeans. Spencer Walter Reid was wearing jeans and a t-shirt. (Y/N) thought she was going to have a heart attack when he got out of the car.

Sure, yes, she had seen him outside work in a more casual outfit, but nothing prepared her for Spencer's camping clothing. It suited him too well for his own good.

- "Hello? Anybody there?"- Prentiss waved at (Y/N). She and JJ stood in front of her, trying to catch her attention.

- "Jesus! you look like a schoolgirl today!"- JJ teased her, laughing- "Can you be more obvious?"

- "What are you talking about?"- (Y/N) tried to look all innocent and continued setting the logs for the campfire.

- "If Spencer wasn't so clueless about your feelings, I swear you two would be already married,"- Emily joked and helped (Y/N) with the logs. The young SSA just shook her head and tried to keep her eyes from Reid for as long as she could. She successfully did it for five minutes. That day's record.

- "(Y/N), hey"- he stood by her side, and she quickly stood up.

- "Hey, how are you doing?"

- "Good... you?"- she just nodded and smiled. She really was acting like a schoolgirl in front of Spencer- "Great... hey, I thought maybe tonight you would like to do some stargazing with me..."- Emily and JJ heard him and nearly squealed. They tried to look away, but it was impossible. They needed to know what was happening. Where was García? she was going to be so mad she missed that.

- "Yeah! I'm sure tonight we can see way more stars than on your building's roof like last time."

(Y/N) answered, smiling, thinking there was nothing more romantic than being underneath a starry sky, listening to Spencer talking about constellations.

- "Ok, kids,"- Rossi's voice stepping out of his huge camper interrupted them and forced everybody to turn around- "Let's do this trust thing we are forced to do before it's lunchtime. Maybe we can manage to go home early."

-

Of course, they weren't. The whole team had to work as a unit to fulfill a series of activities an expert team the FBI had hired forced them to do. Aaron thought it was unnecessary, considering they worked on the field together, and they trusted each other with their lives all the time. But he was also sure his team needed a break, and everybody could use some fresh air.

- "Great work, team"- Hotch hugged everybody and smiled when the whole activity was done- "I think we've earned a nice dinner."

- "Please don't tell me we have to hunt our food"- Penelope wide opened her eyes suddenly and looked at Hotch- "I can eat blueberries."

- "Don't worry, kids"- Rossi shook his head and pointed to his camper- "Anyone in the mood for a nice steak?"

- "I bought marshmallows for the campfire later,"- (Y/N) said and smiled- "You are never too old for some s'more."

- "Scary stories by the fire eating s'mores? I'm ten years old again"- JJ looked excited- "I need to do this with Henry."

- "Just don't tell him your "I'm scared of the woods because I found the camp director dead" story." - Derek said, smiling.

- "You freaked out!"- JJ chuckled, remembering how she had scared her friends a few years earlier while working on a case in the woods.

- "I need to hear that story!"- Emily said- "I bet it's no better than mine, I'm sure."

- "Battle of horror stories?"- (Y/N) smiled evilly- "You two have nothing on me."

-

The evening was fun and a little terrifying. Garcia was holding Derek's arm so tight it was starting to feel numb. Rossi and Hotch had told a couple of stories that left the team completely frightened, to be fair. Especially Spencer. He had forgotten an essential part of his plan: nights in the woods are dark as pitch. And he was afraid of the dark. How would he successfully take (Y/N) to a nice spot, sit down and stare at the stars with her if he was too scared to move from the fire?

(Y/N) looked at Reid and sighed. Maybe he had regretted it. Of course, he hasn't forgotten his invitation, 'cos Spencer remembered everything. Still, he hadn't made any move or sign to go stargazing. Being alone with him in the dark was scary but in the right way. Maybe she could finally tell him how she felt. No, no way. That wasn't going to happen.

- "Ok, so... it's late, and we are out of wine"- Rossi stood up and looked at the team- "I am ready to go to my comfy bed"- the rest of the team groaned. They were going to spend the night in a tent, probably freezing, while Rossi was going to be in his warm camper.

- "I'm going to sleep too, we have trekking in the morning, and it's going to be a long walk. I suggest you all go to bed early."- Hotch stood up and waved at the team, to then walk to his tent."

- "Sweet chocolate thunder, is there room in your tent for me?"- Penelope asked, and he chuckled immediately

- "Are you still scared of the stories? they are just made up things people create to terrify us."

- "I know. But I'm also scared of bears, psycho killers, and slender man"- Morgan looked at her, raising an eyebrow. She wasn't joking.

- "Bring your sleeping bag."

- "You are my hero. I love you."

Prentiss and JJ went to bed soon after, leaving the two love birds alone.

- "Stargazing?"- Reid whispered, and (Y/N) nodded- "We should find a darker stop... or we can stay here by the fire if you like."

- "Are we going to get a nice view here?"- (Y/N) looked at the stars and tried to see anything.

- "No, it has to be darker,"- Spencer whispered, taking a look around- "There was a nice spot by the cliff, that way."

- "I don't think walking to a cliff in the middle of the night is a good idea"- (Y/N) smiled, and Reid shook his head

- "You are right..."

- "But we can walk carefully and carry a flashlight,"- she added and smiled, looking at him. His brown curls moved with the wind, and his chocolate eyes were brighter than the sparks of fire next to them.

- "That sounds good."

Spencer stood still for a second. He had a blanket in one hand and a bag of marshmallows in the other. (Y/N) put on her scarf and jacket and stared at him.

- "Are you ok?"

- "Yeah."

He wasn't. He was trying to calm himself down, thinking that walking in the middle of the dark was worthy because it meant spending time alone with (Y/N).

He kept telling himself he didn't have to worry because nothing was going to happen. He wished he had his gun with him in case of any danger, though. Maybe that could make him feel better.

- "You can't kill darkness, stupid"- he whispered to himself and sighed. (Y/N) walked a step closer and took the marshmallow bag. Then, she held his hand.

- "Let's go?"

That was all Spencer needed. He was ready.

- "Did you know astronomy is the oldest of the sciences?- Reid whispered as they walked hand in hand to a nice clear spot - "Ancient astronomers were able to differentiate between stars and planets, as stars remain relatively fixed over the centuries while planets will move an appreciable amount during a comparatively short time."

- "And when did you start learning about the stars?"- Spencer loved that. How each time he started rambling, she wouldn't get annoyed like the rest of the people he knew. Instead, she would always ask him something related to the subject. And it was usually something personal. She wanted to learn more about him and how he had ended up being such an amazing human being.

- "When I was four, mom started taking me regularly to the library. That was when I started to learn more about science. I could pick ten books each time we were there, and I decided I wanted to know everything I could about everything I loved."

Spencer confessed and smiled, looking at her. His heart was warm with their conversations. He was never comfortable talking about his personal life, especially about his childhood. But with (Y/N), it all came naturally.

- "How often did she take you?"

- "Every other day"- she chuckled and remembered the pictures Diana had shown her of Spencer when he was a little kid last time they visited her. He was adorable, with his glasses and his messy hair. It was impossible not to imagine having a family with him.

- "This is it... this is a good spot."- Spencer said and stopped walking. He moved a log and tapped on it, smiling at (Y/N). She sat with him, and he wrapped them together with the blanket.

- "So, what am I staring at?"- (Y/N) asked and kept her eyes on the starry sky. It seemed she had never seen so many stars. And they even looked closer. Spencer looked at her, and his heart skipped a beat. He was about to start a lecture on astronomy, but instead, he decided to do "his move." Or the move he could think of. He didn't really know if it was a move, but he was going to give it a shot anyway.

- "Most stargazers learn about constellations looking for different noticeable patterns across the sky"- he made a pause clearing his throat. That was it. He was going to do it.

- "That's how it all started,"- he continued- "Some of these noticeable patterns up there are still the same ones our ancestors noticed while sitting around a campfire telling stories like we did today."

- "Telling stories about the stars sounds a lot less creepy, though" - (Y/N) whispered, and the two of them smiled- "Wanna tell me a story about these stars?"

There was no way Spencer could say not to her puppy eyes.

- "Ok... let's see..."- Reid sighed and thought for a moment, looking at the constellations above them- "Do you see those stars over there that look like a cute bunny?"

- "Which ones?"- Spencer pointed at the sky, and (Y/N) nodded- "I see them"

- "Well, you'll see, there was a comet in love with the bunny, but it could only look at her from a safe distance."- Spencer finally confessed. (Y/N) held her breath for a second and tried not to get her hopes high.

- "Why?"

- "Well, the comet was afraid he wasn't good enough for the bunny"- Spencer was whispering, and his soft voice sent shivers to (Y/N)'s body- "So he stared at his favorite constellation every day and only imagined what it would feel like to hold her in his arms."

- "And the bunny never saw the comet?"- (Y/N) asked softly, while very, very slowly, she moved her hand and reached Spencer's.

- "The bunny thought the comet just wanted to be her friend because he was scared to tell her how he felt,"

(Y/N) kept thinking there was no way on earth Spencer was telling her how he felt about her with that adorable story. Was he? Really? 'cos it was too romantic, and if he wasn't and she was wrong... it would be heartbreaking. But, there was only one way to find out.

- "I think the bunny felt the same, but she thought she wasn't good enough for the comet"- Spencer's heart raced at those words, and he turned to look at (Y/N). She blushed and stared at him with a shy smile.

- "Why would the bunny ever think that?"

- "The comet is too brilliant and too amazing to settle for a simple constellation when he could have the sun."

(Y/N) was embarrassed to confess those feelings, but it was now or never.

- "But the bunny is the sun in the comet's life."- Spencer whispered and caressed her cheek with his thumb carefully.

- "Really?"- her voice was so soft, it melted Spencer completely. He couldn't answer. All he could do was to lean in slowly and kissed her as gently as he could, enjoying the sensation of her lips against his. He cupped her face with both hands and moved a little closer.

It was the sweetest kiss he had ever given. It wasn't just because (Y/N)'s lips tasted like marshmallow, but because it was filled with pure love. He could feel it, even when he still couldn't believe it. She loved him. She really did.

(Y/N) was sure that wasn't really happening. She had probably fallen down the cliff earlier and was now unconscious or dead, living a fantasy. There was no way Spencer Reid was kissing her.

When they slowly moved and looked at each other, neither of them knew what to say. So (Y/N) did what she always dreamed of doing and leaned in and kissed him again. Spencer didn't hesitate and wrapped his arms around her waist, moving her closer to him. Her hands played shyly with some of the curls of his hair, and they simply kissed for what seemed to be forever, even when it wasn't enough time for them. Spencer felt he could kiss her his whole life, and he still wouldn't get enough of her.

- "So..."- (Y/N) whispered after some minutes and looked at Spencer, blushing- "Do you think the comet and the bunny could... maybe try to be more than friends?"

He smiled and kissed her again, rubbing her lips carefully with his; (Y/N) sighed into the kiss.

- "The comet is willing to do anything the bunny asks him because he just wants to make her happy all day, every day."

(Y/N) couldn't speak. She could only kiss him again and again.

- "Bunny just wants her comet to be happy too."

- "Then would Bunny be the comet's girlfriend?"- she giggled and nodded- "Good, because I don't think I could ever live without your kisses ever again, Bunny."

- "Neither do I, Comet"

And after that, stargazing was forgotten. There were enough stars in their kisses to keep the two of them lost in their own new universe. 

[fbfh]

I think you've horribly misread the situation [shitty roommate pt 2] - leo x reader

wc: 2.3k

genre: contemporary drama, you're definitly going to get second hand embarrassment, cozy fluff

pairing: leo x reader, attempted isabella x leo

reader: gender neutral, they/them

requested: hell yeah

warnings: mild swearing, roommate tries to steal your man once again, mentions of various mainstream vampire media (twilight, the vampire diaries etc.), brief mention of castlevania (even though i haven't seen it yet lol), breif mention of videogames and assassins creed, very mild delusion (roommate is secretly convinced leo is a vampire that's in love with her), attempted age gap relationship (she's 17 and leo's 19, he shuts that down real fast), very bad poetry

summary: You and Leo are both looking foward to spending a long weekend together, and Leo is determined not to let anything interrupt it, even if it means turning down your roommate's attempts to seduce him in the kitchen.

a/n: absolutley no hate or shade or judgement to anyone who has the same or similar traits as isabella!!!!!! at her core she's annoying because she's the antagonist, not bc of any isolated trait or traits

also she's shitty cause she keeps trying to steal your boyfriend?????

Edit: I forgot to mention before, but this is a college au where you're both still demigods, so you went to camp and on quests and stuff together

This weekend is going to be all about recharging. Recharging from the ridiculous back to back closing and opening shifts at work, recharging from having to redo that stupid project twice because your professor couldn’t decide on a clear way to define the criteria, and recharging from Isabella having her townie friend Regan over almost non stop to “completely shake up her look” as she put it.

Between the constant presence of someone you’d barely consider an acquaintance and Big Time Rush’s self titled album blasting on repeat out of her giant airpod shaped speaker, it’s been harder than usual to get in some effective self care. You have no idea how many more times you can hear the phrase “I’m going for Jade West meets Elena Gilbert, with just a little Buffy Summers” before you lose your fucking mind.

Thankfully, the hard part is almost over. There’s some minor holiday tomorrow on friday, so you and Leo both have a three day weekend ahead of you, which you intend to spend entirely together. You planned ahead, frontloading homework, chores, errands, and everything you could think of to remove anything that isn’t cuddling or playing video games and watching netflix together from your horizon.

This includes going straight from work to the grocery store to stock the fridge and get any snacks you and Leo want. You had texted him a while ago asking for anything he was craving, and head into the store with a concrete list. After a while, you circle around some aisles, avoiding the check out.

“I feel like I’m forgetting something,” you muse, knowing it’s untrue, but hoping to trigger a memory anyway. You can’t put it off any longer, finally checking out and heading back to your apartment. You’d be lying if you said you weren’t avoiding Isabella just a little.

You know bringing in all these groceries would be way easier with Isabella and possibly Regan’s help, but you just don’t have the social energy to talk to anyone, much less her, right now. By some miracle, you bring everything in yourself, and hope to get it put away before you see Isabella.

You turn to the freezer, putting away the ice cream. When you turn back around, you’re suddenly met face to face with Isabella, who has opened one of the boxes and is picking at a pastry.

“Hey girlie,” she says, elongating the hey.

“Hey,” you reply lethargically, putting the last of the groceries away. She looks at the pastry in her hand like she’s just noticing it.

“Sorry, I can’t help it, I’m italian.” She smiles, endeared by her own behavior. You have no idea what being italian has to do with asking before you open a box of your roommate’s food, but this really isn’t out of character for her. She brings up the fact that she’s half italian more than Lele Pons blames her behavior on being latina.

She’s wearing sweatpants that say chaser on the leg in red and gold varsity font, and a tight tee shirt that says “it’s okay to love them both” with silhouettes of the male love interests from one of the vampire shows she always watches. You collect the plastic bags to put in recycling, and see a piece of paper on the counter.

It reads as follows:

Drowning in my mind

No one hears me cry

Who was I before society

Before society put me in a pink dress

And handed me blonde hair dye

And told me to lose ten pounds or be labeled a freak?

The happiest people cry the most

Let the lyrics be your story

But I’m not like the other skinny blonde pretty girls

I’m

Different

-b.g. xox

You hold back a sigh.

“I think this is yours.” you say, handing it to her.

“Oh, it’s just some of my poetry I left lying around, that’s so embarrassing.”

I know, you think, you do that all the time.

“Did you read it?” She asks, hopefully.

“Nope.”

���Thank god, that would have been so embarrassing. My poetry is something really… deep, and personal to me.”

“Uh huh. Hey, I’m going to be doing a lot of self care this weekend, so-”

“Oh!” she interjects, eerily similar to Phoebe Buffay - you guess she’s been watching friends again - “I wanted to ask… is Leo coming over later?” Her voice is riddled with subtext, the expression on her face a little too invested in your answer.

“Uh, yeah. I told you the other day we’re spending the weekend together…”

She cuts you off again, a sudden, intense look on her face.

“When will he be here?”

You check your phone, scrolling through your recent texts.

“By 7 at the latest.” It’s around 6:40 now.

“Oh my god, I have to change,” she rushes back to her room, presumably digging through her recent additions to her closet.

You’re frozen for a minute after the interaction, left with a furrowed brow and the beginnings of a headache. You blink, then choose to reschedule processing why she feels the need to change for your boyfriend to a more convenient time. That’s enough of that for today. You don’t care what else happens, you’re not talking to anyone besides Leo for at least the rest of the day. You retreat to your room to finally shower and change into something comfy. As you pass by Isabella’s room, you hear her talking to Regan.

“...There’s something almost… supernatural about him.”

You bite back a laugh.

“Do you think he’s a…” Regan begins, ending the sentence with something too quiet to hear, but you’d bet almost any organ she said vampire.

So close. So, so close, and yet… here you are.

Not much later, Leo texts you to let you know he’s here. You read his text, and run out to hug him in the living room before even typing a reply. He picks you up, and spins you around. The embrace is warm and fulfilling and familiar, and you wish it would last forever.

“Hi, Sparky.” you murmur into his neck.

“Estrella…” he says, rocking you back and forth gently and pressing a kiss into your jawline, “I missed you so much.” He punctuates the sentence with another kiss, this one to your lips, and you smile more genuinely than you have all day. You’re about to agree when you remember the good news you’ve been saving to tell him in person.

“Guess what I got on sale for like, half off,” you start, excitedly, continuing at his invested expression, “the Assassin’s Creed bundle I showed you!”

“No way,” he starts, and you nod.

“I’ll go get everything set up, drinks are in the kitchen!” He watches you retreat into your room, disbelieving how he could possibly get someone as perfect as you to fall for him. He’s not going to question his luck. He grabs a couple caffeinated sparkling ices, and meets you in your room, setting down his bag and grabbing some comfy clothes to change into.

As you both get settled in, you fill each other in on all the ridiculous shit you’ve been through this week. You finally conclude the bizarre - yet somehow standard - Isabella escapades.

“So I will be avoiding all contact as much as possible,” you laugh.

“Yeah, no shit,” he agrees, “Consider me your human buffer.” You thank him, hugging him again and pressing a kiss to his lips.

The next couple hours are spent cuddling and finishing season 4 of Castlevania. Both reeling from the season finale, you agree this is a good place to take a break, get some food, and decide what game you should start with. It’s already 10pm, which most people would consider too late for dinner, but you have all weekend to fuck up your sleep schedules.

“Let’s review,” Isabella says, holding up two red lipsticks. She turns to Regan. “Which one?”

“That one,” Regan says, pointing to the one on the left, then turns to her list, and continues. “Here’s what we know; we’ve never seen him eat, and he never seems tired. He’s really smart-”

“Almost too smart,” Isabella adds, selecting black rose dangle earrings from her jewelry. Regan agrees, and continues.

“He’s almost hypnotically attractive, and his smile is a little too dazzling.”

“There’s something… supernatural about him. Like he’s not… all human.”

Regan writes this down.

“Plus he’s always wearing black and red, and those flowy button up shirts? It’s all adding up, Ree. That dream that someone was outside my window, the ring, everything…” She says, referencing the black and red cocktail ring she’d found with her stuff when she’d first moved, “I’m not saying it’s definite, just that… there’s a chance.”

“What about…” Regan says hesitantly, nodding toward your room.

“Please,” she scoffs, “he’s only with them to get close to me, like Damon and Caroline. Edward couldn’t have just approached Bella out of the blue, he had to infiltrate her friend group first, to seem less suspicious. Not to sound mean or anything, but they really don’t seem like the type someone… like him… would choose.” her voice gets dreamy when she mentions him.

In spite of having seen most mainstream vampire media almost as many times as Isabella, Regan still considers her the expert on these things, and decides not to point out that Edward didn’t infiltrate Bella’s friend group. Maybe it comes up in one of the retellings she hasn’t read yet.

“So, what now?”

Isabella sets down her lipstick, and turns to her friend.

“I tell him.”

Regan’s eyes widen.

“You’re going to tell him you know?”

“No… not yet. It’s too soon, we don’t have enough evidence. I’m going to tell him I know he’s in love with me, then once he’s secure in our relationship... we’ll see where it goes.”

She stands up, assessing herself in the mirror. She chose her outfit carefully; short red dress with black roses and black mesh collar, black rose bracelet to match her earrings, snug faux leather jacket, and black stiletto ankle booties with a very skinny heel, the zipper on the outside gold, not silver. She fluffs her wavy hair and turns towards the door. She looks back one more time, holding onto the doorway.

“Wish me luck.”

Leo enters the kitchen, seeing Isabella already there, leaning against the counter seductively. She’s wearing an outfit and jewelry this late at night that makes Leo wonder if she’s going to an emo tea party. He puts the takeout in the microwave. She’s still staring at him.

“Uh… hey.”

She lets out a dainty giggle, looking him up and down.

“... Hi.”

At a loss for words, and really wanting the awkward silence to be over, he continues, “Did you need something?”

“What I need,” she walks closer to him, tracing her finger over his collar, “is you.”

What the fuck?

His brain seems to stall for a moment, and she uses this opportunity to continue.

“I know why you’re here. I know that you’re only using them to get closer to me. I know-”

“Woah-”

“That you’re in love with me.”

Okay, double what the fuck.

She takes his stunned silence as shyness, and steps closer, putting her arms around his shoulders.

“You don’t need to play so coy, I-”

This time she’s the one that gets cut off. He grabs her arms and gently steps away, trying to make it abundantly clear that he’s not into this.

“Woah, okay, slow down. First of all, you’re 17 and I’m turning 20 in a couple months, so that’s a hard no. Second, I don’t know where you got this idea, but I am not dating them to get closer to you. We’ve known each other since we were like, 15, and have been through everything together. I’ve only known you for a couple months. I love them. Probably more than I’ve loved anything ever. I thought that was pretty obvious.”

He doesn’t want to be mean, he really doesn’t, but he can tell from the look on her face that she still thinks this is all part of some game.

“So why don’t I ever see you eat? Why are you so smart, and always up at night? I know what you are.”

He has to physically hold back a laugh. He takes a step back, and places his hands on the counter.

“Isabella, I have adhd. And I’m literally an engineering student. Why wouldn’t I be smart and have a shitty sleep schedule?”

She starts to protest, and he pulls out the reheated take out from the microwave.

“And for the record, I do eat.”

Exiting the kitchen quickly and retreating back to your room, he hands you your food.

“I got the game set up!” you say excitedly.

“Nice!”

You take one look at his face and can tell something happened. He sees this, and continues.

“I just had a very… interesting interaction with Isabella,” before he finishes the sentence, your head is already in your hands. You let out a groan.

“What did she do?” you mutter from behind your hands.

He pulls you into his lap, rubbing your back.

“I’m not totally sure,” you laugh, “but I think she thinks I’m secretly in love with her…” you’re both laughing before he can even finish the sentence.

“No…” you laugh, “no fucking way…”

“Believe me, I put an end to that as soon as it started.”

“Oh, I do.”

He runs his hand over your back, and you’re quiet for a moment.

“You know,” he continues, “I think getting our own place has definitely moved up the priority list.”

You couldn’t agree more.

[malfoys-demigod]

You, Me, and Salsa Nights

Leo Valdez x Reader

A/N: It was brought to my attention that @kwilliamoon thinks my Leo fics are bomb and I love them so much for that. Enjoy, all! 

Request from them: PLS PLS UHHHH CAN I REQUEST LIKE A LEO FIC WHERE HIM AND HIS GF ARE IN THR MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT AND THEY CANT SLEEP SO THEY GO INTO THEIR BIG LIVING ROOM AND HE KINDA TEACH HER SALSA OR SMTH AND THEY DANCE LIKE THAT IN A CUTE WAY??

Word Count: 1.6k 

After another long-lasting and draining day at Camp Half-Blood, Leo Valdez was finally done with the day. It was Friday, which meant he went through the last of many things for the weekday. He was finished with the last cabin inspection first thing in the morning, greek classes, battle training, various activities and chores, competition, and campfire sing-along, which he was glad to avoid during the weekends, now that he could have the option to dodge the favorite hobbies of the children of Apollo. 

With it being eleven o’clock in the evening, it was curfew time, and Leo felt a wave of relief the moment he crashed into his comfy single-bed. ‘Happy Friday indeed,’ he thought to himself as his eyes closed, breathing in slowly as he tried falling asleep. 

It was only a few minutes past eleven o’clock when Leo’s face wrinkled in disappointment as he frustratingly sat back up, opening his irritated eyes. What was wrong with him? Why did he feel the need not to sleep at the moment? He shook his head and laid his back against the bed again, trying to knock himself asleep once again. He closed his eyes harder, trying to tell his body that it was time to doze off. 

Not even one minute had passed when Leo’s head felt like an erupting volcano. He started grumbling curse words in Spanish as he sat back up again, placing his hand on his forehead. He looked around the room, examining all his half-siblings, who have succeeded in falling asleep unlike him, which made him envious of what they were doing at the moment. Since his body was not up for sleeping, he had no problem getting out of his steel bunk bed, actively, but slowly, to make sure he wouldn’t wake up anybody. 

Luckily for him, he was nearby the iconic fire pole of his cabin, which comes down from the second floor, the floor he was currently at, all the way to the ground floor. He grabbed onto the pole and made his way down to the ground floor, which was always unclean and messy, filled with junk most of the time. 

Leo looked around the room, checking out the workbench with overflew with scrap metal, screws, bolts, washers, nails, rivets, and a million other machine parts. He may have had the energy to get out of bed, but did not have the enthusiasm to do any work, plus, there was another chance of waking anyone up. 

He made his way to the exit of the cabin, which had a lot of gears around, as he slowly opened the door and stood by the entrance of his cabin. He wasn’t scared of getting caught by authorities such as Mr. D or Chiron, because he was a counselor! He could have made a small, white lie and defended himself by saying he thought he heard someone try to sneak out. Besides, he knew a couple of people, cabin-mate or not, who would also be seen, awake at this ungodly hour. 

Leo was leaning by the brick wall of the entrance, looking all the way at Cabin Four, the cabin covered in beautiful flowers and tomato plants, which would grow on the walls and doorway. It wasn’t hard for Leo to find his girlfriend, Y/N, who would be often seen at night, randomly watering the wildflowers and roses, which grow on the porch, as a way to serve her boredom at night. She too was someone who had trouble sleeping like Leo. 

It didn’t take long for Y/N to discover that her boyfriend was up at night as well on that day. As she was watering the flowers, she noticed a small spot of fire from the corner of her eyesight, waving in mad directions. She looked up and turned to see a figure by Cabin Nine, waving around the small spot of fire she could feel from the corner of her eyesight. 

There was a smile on her face the moment she realized that it was her boyfriend Leo, who was the one by the entrance of Cabin Nine. Y/N quickly finished watering the plants and discretely jogged from her cabin to Leo’s. Leo was opening his arms wide, as Y/N’s body crashed with his, hugging him as tight as she could. 

Leo could hear small giggles from her girlfriend, as he pulled away to see that she was smiling happily from her giggles. “Couldn’t sleep again, mi amor?” he obviously asked her, placing a strand of her hair in the back of her ear. 

Y/N nodded, “Guilty as charged.” Leo nodded as well, understanding her. “Me neither. And I even thought today was one of the most tiring days we’ve had,” he complained playfully. 

Y/N laughed at his complaint, “You probably are starting to lack cardio, Valdez,” she sarcastically suggested, “I can’t sleep because I fear I might have nightmares,” she embarrassingly said, “like last night.” She looked down to the ground, contemplating on the nightmare she experienced recently. 

Leo placed a finger on her chin, causing her to look back up at him. “Hey,” he quietly said, “Nightmares aren’t something to be ashamed of. We all get ‘em too, Y/N. Like literally, last week, I didn’t want to tell you this but I dreamt that Festus ate all my scrap metal, which caused me to wake up screaming and waking up my other cabin-mates.”

Y/N’s embarrassed smile turned into laughter as she giggled again, “And is that why I overheard Jake Mason and Nyssa Barrera complain about you last week?” Leo shrugged sarcastically, without an answer, meaning that it was definitely about that. Y/N nodded in understanding, which caused Leo to shake his head, “Anyways,” he said, “I have a proposition for you, mi amor.”

“I’m listening,” Y/N said. 

Leo turned around to open the door to his cabin. He took a hold of Y/N’s hand as he brought her inside his cabin. Y/N hesitantly pulled his hand, which made him turn around to her attention. “Leo, are you sure this is a good idea for me to be in your cabin? At this hour? I think I should get going-”

“Relaaaax, mamacita,” Leo comforted her, placing his hands on her shoulders, “I’m a counselor of this cabin. I’ve got power here.” he confidently assured her. Y/N took a deep breath and gave in, nodding at Leo, who smiled in relief. 

“Okay,” he said, “I need cardio, and you need something to help distract you from thinking about another round of nightmares, right?” 

“Mhm,” Y/N verified, “And what about them?”

Leo grinned with something on his mind as he turned around to switch on the radio he built, turning on an energetic song, but at a low volume, which was perfect for the two of them to hear. Y/N tilted her head, wondering why he did that. “What’s happening, Leo?”

A smirk grew on Leo’s face as he walked closer to Y/N, placing one hand on her waist, and another on her shoulder. “Cuera Maraca y Bongo is happening and I’m going to teach you how to dance the salsa.”

Y/N’s eyes grew wide, but she followed Leo and placed her hands on him as well. “Are you sure this is a good proposition, Leo?” she hesitantly asked him. 

“Again, relax, Y/N/N,” he reminded her, “You’re going to be a natural in this. If my mother taught a hard-headed person like me, then I can teach someone who’s unsure of whether she has the moves in her or not.”

-- 

Y/N, as instructed by Leo, rocked back on her right foot to the beat of the song. She smoothly shifted her weight from the front to back to shift her body position. Leo smiled as she cooperated and executed it well. He swung his hips slightly to accentuate the movement, which she willingly followed. 

She didn’t question how smooth of a dancer her boyfriend was, but instead, she focused on becoming somehow smooth of a beginner dancer that night. 

Once the song was finished, Leo and Y/N were still in each other’s arms, looking at each other with admiration. Leo was astonished at how quickly his girlfriend could learn the salsa, as he took weeks to months, learning from the footsteps of his own mother. There was more to learn about Y/N from his point of view. 

From Y/N’s point of view, she was staggered by how excellent of a dancer he was. She was always there when Leo would taunt others, teasing them that they were to be cautious of his ‘sick dance moves’ he kept in his sleeves. She never knew how much of a skilled dancer he actually was, and they were in fact, the sickest moves she ever witnessed. 

It was time to break the silence when Leo and Y/N coincidentally spoke at the same time, expressing, “You’re amazing.” There was awestruck in their reactions, for saying the same thing at the same time, and for bringing out the truth all of a sudden. 

Y/N chuckled, grinning at Leo, “Leo, I never knew how much of a dancer you were. This is definitely something you should show off to everyone here.”

Leo, flattered, shook his head and hands, “No, no, no, as much as I want to show this off, and believe me, I do, since I have the right to,” he teased, “YOU, my lovely girlfriend, should be the one showing off those moves- well, to the girls, definitely NOT the guys here- er- anyways, Y/N, you’re going to be natural in such a quick time, believe me. You have gifts.”

Y/N smiled, “Aw, thanks, Leo.” Then, all of a sudden, her smile turned into a surprised facial expression, as Y/N figured something out. “Leo! I think we just found a way to use up sleepless nights.”

Leo, happy as ever, leaned in and kissed Y/N’s forehead, and said, “You, me, and salsa nights.”

[sarahlynnirl]

Losing my best friend - Sugar Daddy culture is not empowering

I finally feel strong enough to talk about this and hopefully get some love, support, and reassurance from other women who agree that this is fucked up. I’ve never been “terfy on main” before so here goes. (TW child abuse + SA but no graphic descriptions of SA)

My mother is a narcissist who financially and emotionally abused my father and myself, with some additional physical abuse of me, for as long as I can remember. My dad made plenty of money but my mom controlled it all and made sure it didn’t go towards anything for me beyond the bare minimum required not to look obviously guilty of child abuse and neglect. I met Kiara (not her real name) when I was a junior in highschool and she was a freshman. Her mom was a single Korean woman doing her best to support Kiara and her 2 sisters while also running a Korean restaurant. My first jobs were a summer camp counselor and fitting room attendant at Forever 21. I would spend the last scraps of my paycheck making sure Kiara was able to order a full meal when our friends went out to dinner, buying her little gifts, and generally trying to keep us both as happy and healthy as possible.

When Kiara graduated highschool her mom drove her into Koreatown New Jersey, got her a room in the apartment of an acquaintance, and basically left her to fend for herself. Kiara spoke barely any Korean. She began working at a Korean salon where she met Ariana (not her real name). She had a NY cosmetology license, not an NJ one, while Ariana was an illegal immigrant from Korea so they were both overworked, underpaid, forced to work overtime, paid under minimum wage, and deprived of their tips. They couldn’t report or complain about this since they were both working illegally.

Kiara had to pay rent for the one room she occupied despite her land lady yelling at her, walking into her room while she slept, banning her from having friends over, and reporting to her mom if she spoke to a guy on the phone or a guy dropped her off. I was working at a restaurant in my college town on top of my classes and doing my best to keep surprising her with little gifts, but neither of us had enough disposable income to afford to visit each other. This was really difficult for me as she was my favorite person in the world and I was used to spending every second with her when we both lived in upstate NY. Ariana got them both to start using SeekingArrangement for one time meet ups with Sugar Daddies where they were paid anywhere from $200-2000 for sex. “The first time I ever did it I walked out of the hotel and just screamed because I was so disgusted and I was thinking about his wrinkly skin touching mine and all I wanted to do was get in the shower and scrub it off but I had $1000 cash in my hand for a couple hours of work which was so crazy and kinda made it all worth it ya know?” - Ariana to me

I was immediately skeptical and a little grossed out but Kiara genuinely seemed happier. She was buying new clothes for herself, ordering food to the apartment when she was hungry, and taking trips into NYC to have fun with Ariana and her friends. By the beginning of the summer of 2019, Kiara had found the Sugar Daddy who she would establish a long term agreement with and who ultimately ended up completely supporting her. I’m not going to say his name here but if people want to know it just ask, I am willing to share. He moved her into a much nicer much bigger apartment with Ariana as her roommate. He paid for me to fly up and visit her, and all of our activities during this vacation. I’m so sorry I’m so sorry I’m so sorry. I wish I shoved the money back in her hand before it was too late, I wish I worked harder and longer hours and got us an apartment in Florida and paid both of our rent. I’m so fucking sorry I didn’t listen to my instincts and allowed her to brush off my concerns. It was the most freedom we had ever had, I ran around NYC by myself while she was at work, and my ex took the bus to NJ from upstate NY and joined us for a few days. I feel so selfish but I also didn’t know how bad things would get.

One night Kiara and I went to NYC for dinner with her SD and she took the bus back to the apartment because she had to work early the next morning. It made sense for me to stay in the city because I was supposed to visit my friend at NYU the next morning. In the Uber to his apartment alone with him he was drunk and high and I very clearly looked scared shitless. At this point she was 19 (but she had looked that way since age 17 and I doubt he would have minded if she was lying about her age), I was 21 and he was 44. He seemed offended by my discomfort and was basically like “jeez relax I’m not gonna touch you, I really care about Kiara I think she’s so amazing, just go to the guest room and sleep, make a left to walk to NYU when you wake up.” I peaced the fuck out of there early the next morning.

After that summer Kiara and Ariana quit their jobs at the Korean salon and sugaring became their sole incomes. Ariana was still doing one time meet ups, not nearly as financially stable as Kiara, and got herself into a lot of credit card debt that to my knowledge she’s still in. At this point Kiara was flying down and staying with me in Florida so often that people at my college thought she went there too. I also wasn’t working at this point because college had gotten harder and my ex was fucking up my mental health real bad. He had given me a coke problem and Kiara sending me “grocery money” was enabling me to continue. I wasn’t honest with her about where all the money was going. During Halloween week we didn’t know that she couldn’t just snort molly (MDMA) with the frequency I was doing coke, she ODed, my guy best friend took us to the ER, it was so fucking scary, she got IV fluids for 2 hours and made a full recovery, she stopped doing molly, I kept doing coke. I’m so sorry :(

In November her SD paid for us to take a trip to Cancun Mexico. He was with us for the first part of the trip and this is where things started to get really bad. He tried to be my friend and act the way a boyfriend of my best friend who was my age would, but it was creepy and wrong and I was so uncomfortable. He asked about my drug use in a way that was gross and shamey and basically him seeing me as the “coke whore” stereotype...while continuing to buy me more coke. He also brought and gave us ecstasy pills. He asked really invasive questions about my relationship with my ex, why I stayed, my sex life, etc. It felt like an uncle asking me these questions, I did NOT wanna talk about any of this with him. But from what I did say it was very clear to someone with 44 years of life experience that I had an abusive mother, an addictive personality, and was in an unhealthy relationship. He offered to set me up with an SD friend of his looking for a sugar baby. I of course declined because I always knew this was a boundary I wasn’t willing to cross. No matter how bad my addictions got I would NOT give up that piece of myself in return for money.

In this part of Mexico, drugs that were only given with a prescription in the US were available over the counter. Kiara and I got a little box of 1mg Xanax with my money. My ex had given us Xanax a couple times in NY and we had fun with it, but at this point in time we did NOT have a problem with it. We had bought one bar, broken it in half, and each took half one night of Halloween week and called it “xanpires”, but this wasn’t something we were scripted or buying regularly from plugs. We went to dinner with her SD, we got up to go to the bathroom, and she immediately slipped and hit the ground. I was like woah did you take one of the xans and forget? Because we were supposed to tell each other if we were taking one so we could look out for each other. I was never mad at her! I never wanted money from her! I was just a little concerned, and once I determined that she was safe we thought it was kinda funny that she had taken a xan without realizing and started joking around about it. Her SD of course didn’t understand how a 19 year old and 21 year old girl joke with each other because he was a creepy old man, decided that we were “arguing”, and got up from the restaurant, walked across the street, bought a 90 count bottle of 2mg xans and gave it to me. This was honestly the most irresponsible way someone has ever treated me in my life, and this is coming from someone with an abusive and neglectful parent. Google “benzo withdrawal” if you’re not familiar with it.

We went to a different hotel, and Kiara and I both took xans and blacked out. I passed out on the guest bed, while Kiara was awake but in a conscious blackout. I woke up on the couch on the balcony (which was fine, it was comfy and I saw the sunrise over the beach. The gross part was that meant her SD had picked me up, put his hands on my body while I was unconscious and carried me out there). I remembered that at one point I had woken up, wanted to go to the bathroom or get something from inside, caught a glimpse of what I thought was them having sex, and went back outside. I mentioned it to Kiara and she had no memory of it whatsoever, she thought all she had done was gone to sleep. She was rightfully pissed the fuck off that her SD had taken advantage and done things with her while she was blacked, screamed at him, he gave us a half ass apology, and bought us more stuff (buying our silence). He finally flew home and we got to enjoy the trip with just each other, but I was careless with the dosage of a drug called tramadol, and I ODed with my head in her lap...I’m sorry. When I woke up I was hallucinating, hearing voices, crying hysterically and terrified. Kiara called my ex who asked how many mg I took, told us I was 100mg short of the amount that would require medical attention, made me laugh, and told me to go to sleep. I recognize how scary and unfair to her this was and I really do take responsibility for my actions. The day I was supposed to leave I did ecstasy, hooked up with a guy from Canada, and tried to skip my flight. She was mad because like yeah what the fuck. She got me on the flight, the ecstasy comedown hit, and there’s pictures of me crying in the airport because I hated when we fought.

I was supposed to stop in Miami, then fly back to my college town but while in Miami I texted my granny that I was “sad and really didn’t feel good and could she and my uncle visit me at the airport and bring my uncles dog?”. Her parenting instincts went off that something was very wrong, made me skip the flight, picked me up from the airport and took me to her house where I immediately threw up and ran an extremely high fever that night. She said it was one of the scariest nights of her life and she kept checking on me to see if I needed to go to the hospital. She drove me back to my college town where my guy best friend took me to the ER and it came out that Kiaras SD, in addition to giving me drugs, had also allowed me to drink Mexican tap water throughout the entire trip. I was treated for that + given chlamydia meds just in case since I’d had unprotected sex in a foreign country. I was fine, promised to do better, Kiara forgave me, things started to go back to normal. Except I had begun taking Xanax daily to deal with the anxiety of the illness...and she had a trip to Bali planned.

During that trip things managed to get even worse. She was there with her SD and another Korean friend and her SD was pressuring her and guilting her into sex, isolating her from her friend, going through her phone, and becoming extremely aggressive. She would call me crying and having panic attacks and I would walk out of class to try to comfort her over FaceTime. She did not have panic attacks before this trip. She begged to go home early because something was very wrong but he said it was a waste of money and kept her in Bali until the planned end of the trip. I think it was almost a month. She sent me a recording she secretly took of him screaming at her and her saying “don’t touch me, don’t grab me like that, leave me alone”. When she got back to the US I was begging her to stop. I was so worried for her safety. I said the money wasn’t worth it, we’ll get jobs, please just stop. I’m pretty sure he read those messages. We also had a suspicion that he had installed spyware on her phone but were never able to prove it. At this point I also reached out to my dad for help and his response was basically “I don’t care, not my problem, focus on school”. I reached out to my granny who absolutely cared, but her response was “I’m sorry but I can’t afford to support her, I have to focus on taking care of you, if she won’t stop this you’ll have to stop being friends with her”.

I went home to New York for winter break, suffered through my first round of Xanax withdrawal and was truly trying to get better but my ex manipulated his was back in my life and got me addicted again....but now this bottle of 90 had run out. I went back to my college town, got scripted, and was copping street bars when my script inevitably ran out early. What comes next is blurry for obvious reasons. We moved to the town in Florida my granny lived in and got an apartment together. The female friends she made in our town (my current home) she got most of them into sugaring and using SeekingArrangement. Things deteriorated super fast at this point. I was struggling hard, failing my online classes, and eventually got completely financially cut off by my parents. My granny was paying my half of the rent and my puppy’s vet bills but I was too embarrassed to admit I couldn’t afford groceries. Kiara was pressuring me hard to go on SeekingArrangement but I still refused. I would sit on the floor of the bathroom in a towel after I showered and just cry because the steam made me nauseous and dizzy since I wasn’t eating.

I met my current boyfriend and something just started to click: I didn’t wanna live like this anymore. The mom of a friend from this town who also refuses to sugar landed me an interview at the gym I currently work at, I fought for the job, and I got it. Now I knew I didn’t wanna be completely fucked up all the time anymore but I was still doing enough Xanax to keep me out of withdrawal. The 2mg that had blacked me out at the beginning were now just barely enough to keep me functional. Kiara and I were fighting frequently and bad by this time. She and her partner in sugaring, Mena (not her real name but pretty close to it, fuck this bitch fr) were expecting me to keep how they made their money a secret....from friends and guys that I saw every single day. They both very obviously did not work and were flexing new cars, designer clothes, and cash all over their social media. Kiara thought she could cover her ass by saying she dealt drugs but it was also obvious that she wasn’t putting the time into that to come up with the amount of money she had. The only one dealing drugs was me, and not enough to do anything flashy, just enough that in addition to my work money I was usually getting enough to eat. But there were still some times when the previous weeks paycheck had run out and I was having my first meal of the day at 3pm after someone had bought adderall from me. We had our serious serious fight where she threw my stuff in the lawn and I lived with my current boyfriend full time for about a couple weeks since my bedroom at my granny’s was getting refloored when this happened.

By January 20th he was concerned by my Xanax problem and wanted me to seriously try to stop. At the time I started tapering because I wanted the girlfriend title but I’m forever grateful for him giving me a reason, even if it was a shallow one, because I just needed to START. We tried to reconcile once, despite boyfriend and guy best friend begging me not to, and of course the same problems reappeared, we had another serious fight and haven’t spoken since.

Now the fog is clearing and today I’m 96 days clean of xanax, 16 days clean of all benzos, and 19 days clean of gabapentin (what was keeping me from having a seizure while quitting benzos). But it’s hard because being out of the fog means feeling all of my emotions, even the really bad ones. This past week I’ve been waking up and crying sitting in front of my mirror trying to put my makeup on for work and it just drips right off and I have to start over. She was my best friend for 8 years. My favorite person. My partner in life. I loved her more than anyone.

My boyfriend and guy best friend are pretty uncomfortable when they hear someone express an opinion of me that’s “Kiara’s side of the story” and I don’t correct it. Both of them saw exactly how bad it got near the very end and don’t get why I don’t defend myself more or tell people about her letting my dog eat dab (THC) wax while she was supposed to be watching her and having to be rushed to the animal hospital TWO separate times. (She’s a Pomeranian and the highly concentrated THC was super dangerous to her tiny little body). Yelling at me and giving me the silent treatment because less than 48 hours after my SA she expected me to drive her to a hair appointment in Miami and I woke up late and didn’t get her there on time with traffic. Me begging her to be there for me when it felt like everything was falling apart and I self harmed for the first time and her leaving me to go on a vacation to Orlando with a girl we didn’t even really like. Me not wanting to sleep in the apartment alone after my SA and her not letting me sleep in her bed anymore, her and Mena just dumping me at the neighbor’s so they could continue to sugar, party, and see guys our age at night (this sounds super awful but neighbors roommate —> current boyfriend. He kept me safe until I felt better, was really sweet and careful, and I was the one to make the first move). There’s more but I really don’t like talking about it, after the abuse she went through and I assume is still going through, I expect her to be pretty damaged and not have it in her to treat people right all the time. Not exposing every bad thing she’s ever done to all our mutual friends and acquaintances is kind of my last gift to her.

I also admit that sugaring wasn’t responsible for everything that went wrong. Loving an addict is difficult and exhausting and I went through it myself with my ex. I was also out bi and she was “probably straight, maybe a little bi-curious” in her words. But when she was drunk or on Xanax she’d kiss me first...we had done more than kiss but only during 3somes with a guy. I don’t know, I think I loved her more than I was supposed to and some of the stuff she’d say made me think she saw me in a way she really didn’t. When we first moved to this town I had a thing with a girl and expected it to be no big deal but things here were different than up north. I got called the d slur for the first time by someone who wasn’t joking. It was like getting slapped I was so shocked and hurt, I truly didn’t think that happened anymore. I think she saw what happened to me and kinda closed off that part of herself because she didn’t wanna experience that herself. She stopped making out with me at bars and parties after that and it made me sad and maybe a little jealous. But I really do blame her SD for basically “breaking her”, for handing me that first bottle of free Xanax, for a lot of other little things that I can’t possibly include because this is already way too long. This is my first time even saying this much. Feel free to add your own experiences or thoughts on this or anything you’d like. [I’m prepared to get death threats or called a SWERF or whatever but I don’t care, now that I started talking about this I’m not going to stop.]

[mmvalentine]

But You pt 1 | Feysand

Modern AU, college-y sort of. Part 2

Feyre worried about Rhys going to college. Of course his grades were impeccable, it’s just that he had never been very good at making friends. When they were in the second grade, the teacher had asked them all to say what their dream world might look like, and where all the other kids had said things like “a world with unicorns” or “a world where we have swords for hands,” Rhys had said “a world where everyone is warm and comfy and loved.” And then one of the boys had laughed at him, called him stupid, and then stalked around the room chopping everyone down with his sword-hands. By the time the teacher had calmed everyone down and gotten them to sit back in the centre of the room, she had quite forgotten little Rhys, who was hiding under a table. Feyre, always a watchful, observant creature, had brought him pillows from the reading nook, and set up camp with him beneath the desk.

She was pretty sure that was the last time Rhys had made a friend. Because they were inseparable all through primary school and middle school, and when Feyre started making more friends in high school, Rhys just wandered off to the library.

“Don’t you want to stay and sit with us?” Feyre would ask him. Rhys just smiled and shrugged, and then sauntered off to be with his books instead.

Of course, Rhys wasn’t antisocial or anything. In fact he had always been so sensitive. And he needed so much physical affection- had toned it down as they progressed through school, but still spent most afternoons sprawled over the foot of Feyre’s bed, a leg or hip against hers, as long as they always had one point of contact. He had one or two romantic entanglements, but they never seemed to last long. Feyre wondered sometimes whether Rhys had decided early on that people were callous and cruel, and most weren’t worth the risk.

So when she got into a college on the opposite coast, and Rhys got a scholarship somewhere up north, Feyre seriously worried about what might happen to him left to his own devices.

Rhys had rolled his eyes when she broached the subject.

“I’ll be fine, Feyre darling,” he said. “Look at me. I’m unreasonably handsome.” “And has that helped you make any friends in high school?” Feyre had demanded, eyebrows raised. “It helped me get you,” he said with a rakish grin. “And you are all I need.” “Right but you won’t have me in six weeks,” Feyre said, feeling like she was going in circles. Rhys only shrugged. “I’ll be fine,” was all he said.

In the end Feyre decided that Rhys was just less in need of people than she was. She had always enjoyed company, and bouncing ideas off people. Rhys lived more inside himself.

And so she packed up for college, said goodbye to her friends, and went to one last party before she was due to drive off the next morning. Rhys hadn't wanted to come, of course, he never did. Truth be told, she felt a little disappointed but not surprised. It would have been nice to hang out one more time before she left.

Disappointments aside, Feyre was ecstatic to be leaving her hometown. It was small, and dingy, and contained her two awful sisters and she just knew she would go and never look back. She hoped Rhys would be able to do the same thing.

Feyre left the house wearing a scandalous silver dress. It was such a conservative town, she knew she'd be getting looks but screw it, she was leaving tomorrow. She took the bus to the sorry excuse for a bar the town had, and as she looked out the window she couldn't say she would miss any of this.

The bar had stained carpets and flickering lights. For some reason, Alis was devoted to it and was here most weekends. Feyre had turned her down many times, but figured it was as good a place as any to spend her last night in town. Lucien was already there too, taking up half the booth with his long limbs.

"Feyre!" Alis squealed. She hugged her friend tightly, and then Lucien pushed two shot glasses toward her as she sat down. "You're two behind Feyre, drink up."

And that would be the last clear thing that Feyre remembered from that night.

Hours later, she swayed on her front door step and tried to open the door without waking anyone. This was particularly difficult because the keyhole kept moving.

She managed to get herself up the stairs without anyone coming out, and closed her bedroom door behind herself thankfully. Dropped her purse on the ground, threw her coat over the chair, and stumbled toward the bed.

Where Rhys was sitting, his legs crossed at the ankles and his back against the headboard, with a bemused smirk on his handsome face.

"Hello, Feyre darling," he said. "Rhys? How did you get in here?" Rhys shrugged. "Through the window." "I'm on the second floor." "I climbed." Feyre's alcohol addled brain struggled to put this together.

"Okay..." she said. "But, what are you doing here?" Rhys fiddled with a loose thread on Feyre's duvet cover. "Wanted to see you," he said. "I invited you out tonight." Rhys rolled his eyes. "Yeah but I hate those guys. I just want to see you."

Feyre walked unsteadily round the side of the bed and sat down next to Rhys.

"You always just want to see me, Rhys," she said. "Come on seriously, you know you're going to have to talk to other people at college." "I hate other people." "You hate everyone." "I don't hate you."

Feyre just peered at him until he squirmed.

"Okay, okay, I promise I'll talk to people at college. Now can you take that ridiculous thing off and come hang out with me?" Feyre sighed. "Fine. Turn." She circled her finger in the air, indicating for Rhys to face away from her. He huffed but then turned his back obediently, and she got out of her ridiculous dress and into flannel pyjama pants.

"Rhys," she said. "Are you sitting on my t-shirt?" "I don't think so?" Rhys said. He pulled off his own shirt and held it out to her without turning. "Here," he said. "You can have mine." "Well aren't you a gentleman," Feyre said. "You know this is my house, I have a whole wardrobe full of t-shirts." But tired as she was, she pulled it on anyway, and slid into bed.

Rhys turned when Feyre told him it was okay. "I know, but I like you in my clothes," he said. And snuggled down next to her.

"Hey," she said. "You can't sleep in here." "Why not?" Rhys asked. "I've slept in here plenty of times." "You're usually on the floor." "But you're leaving me tomorrow," Rhys complained. "Can't I just stay tonight?"

Feyre sighed. The alcohol still sloshing through her veins was making her sleepy, and made it hard to care about anything.

"Sure," she said. "I don't know why you don't just sleep in your own bed." "Because you aren't in it," Rhys said with a grin. Feyre frowned. "Turn off the lights, would you." She closed her eyes.

A second later, the room was peacefully dark, and Rhys laid his head down on the pillow next to hers.

"You know," he said more quietly. "I used to sleep up here." "Sure, when we were kids," Feyre said. She yawned. "I wish I could do it every night," Rhys murmured. "Why?" Feyre asked. Even though she was lying down now, the room still spun somehow. "Because I miss you when you're not there," he whispered. "Well what are you going to do when I'm at college?" she asked, and the words were like cotton in her mouth. "Think about you everyday," Rhys said, "and wish that I had told you when you were sober that I have no idea what I'm going to do without you and I've never been so scared in my life."

But Feyre was asleep by that point, and wouldn't remember that Rhys kissed her forehead before closing his eyes too.

****

HOKAY phew I really hit a wall there and was panicking a bit so I am very happy to be back in a chapter fic. Big ol' thanks and also smooshy kisses to my brain trust @feyrearcherons and @asteria-of-mars for getting me over the line.

TAGLIST: @ghostlyrose2 @highladysith @stardelia @tillyrubes10 @feysand-babies @ratabrasileira @live-the-fangirl-life @maybekindasortaace @annejulianneh111 @thebonecarver @rowaelinismyotp @loosingdreams @whythefuckdoiexist

MASTERLIST

[thedarkestcrew]

Nico and Ruby being pals because why not part 1

For all their wonderful ideas; @east-river-burned and @thedarkestminds  i love them and didn't realize there were so many active TDM accounts! go follow them, amazing

part 2

Ruby's main drive for the Thurmond attack was she felt like she left a bunch of kids behind when the league took her out in TDM. I believe that Nico has the same guilt and feels like the other kids would have benefited a lot more from being "outside" and maybe he deserves to be in camp rather than being a useless green. 

One night Ruby is talking about this to him and he starts sobbing because he's so relived that he's not alone and that he has someone he can talk to. Ruby and her new found need to help everyone instantly starts comforting him and stops pushing him away

Ruby tells Nico that its okay. that nothing is his fault either with Jude.  he absolutely breaks down because yes they're family but some times its good to hear it after being abandoned by everyone that loved him - Jude, parents, Clancy, Cate left, Vida didn't make a real effort to be his friend. it just feels nice to know he matters to someone after his only friends died (Jude and Blake)

have you seen how Ruby and Nico are just comfy being (Low key) depressed together in ITA when the finally talked about Jude. That's the supportive energy I need in my life

also they've been through so much together

1. They were both manipulated by the same person that they thought loved them 

2.Both Thurmond freak kiddies 

3. Loved Jude and had to loose him and both thought of it as their fault

the way they'll just get a night mare about Clancy, camp, Jude, you name it and just call each other to deal is great

you know those two nerds just hang out listening to music and full out sobbing but also dancing around like maniacs( just flailing their arms around bc these two gawky teens cant dance to save their lives)or they'll be regular sobbing on the floor and Vida will throw blankets at them to “muffle the sound”

Ruby’s parents or Cate calling Liam and is like " uh hey Ruby and Nico and singing along to " Drivers License" and crying... are you and Ruby good?" que Liam freaking out thinking Ruby is going to break up with him

omg Cate she’ll come home too many times to them crying on the floor or something and feels obligated to get water so they don't dehydrate themselves 

No one can convince me Nico doesn't go into 3 am depression bakes till cate wakes up to 90 brownies and drags him back to bed and then he ships a bunch to Ruby in the morning

She gets so exited when she hears the mailman come because it's either Liam sending letters to be cute, or Nico's famous shortcake

Ruby being frustrated with the government sometimes and Nico is like " you know what, pardon my French but SCEW them. I'm going to hack into that politician's computer and make the WIFI connection really bad! That'll show them!"

she knows it wont do anything major but she appreciates that someone she considers family wound do something like that for her even if it risks him getting in trouble

MOVIE NIGHTS 

like the saddest movie marathons

need to have water bottles on stand by or they'll get light headed

Vida walking in and saying they look like miserable slugs whos mother died, but getting them popcorn none the less

Zu comes in with chubs and they join in because government people know how to drain the life out of you

poor cate has to come home to 5 of her kids sobbing on the floor throwing popcorn at her tv... she slowly backs out

sometimes after a nightmare about Clancy or Camp or Jude they'll call the other and become quite support for the other because ya, Liam and Vida are amazing friends but sometimes the “we can talk about it and ill try to make you happy “ and “lets go hit the gym for relief” attitude isn't what they need

also their sleep schedules are so messed up Nico will be fully awake at 3 am coding and Ruby will just decide to rearrange her room because the bed is not in the command position and it makes her nervous so great times to call the other

Maybe they'd both talk about Clancy and get some closure about being used. Like I know Ruby took the high road at the end of ita but before than she'd start shaking when she heard his name after he verbally (and sexually) abused her. He's the main reason she can't trust anyone. (before coming to east river she was beginning to get close with lee but than CLANCY got in the way and made her take like 3 steps back.) Maybe she has some doubts about taking the high road but Nico talks to her and shares some good memories of him so she feels like she DID do the right thing and didn't just give a monster a perfect life and allowed him to be happy when he was the reason that Cole died

also ruby feeling horrible and blaming herself for Cole like “I should have known Clancy was in my head. I could have been better. I Should have been better instead of allowed my self to be manipulated and now Cole … Cole is dead because I was too weak..” Nico will take absolutely none of that because he’s seen Clancy use his abilities and understands that no one can over come something like that and that she should stop sulking and instead get better control of her powers so it never happens again

maybe they are in this odd middle space that is being in a camp (seeing all those horrible things and all agreeing not to talk about it hoping those memories will go away) as well as seeing the outside world and discovering it's not much better. Like even just at the league avoided them because they were freaks and also because they were broken/depressed/bummers from camp; like I'm sorry, YOU try going through years of torture, not trusting, not talking, not being able to sleeping safely, not touch anyone and see how YOU turn out! YA Not very cuddly huh?!!

Ruby telling him things like “you are incredible” or “you’re the best” like she did with Zu and him at Walmart and the ranch. He will blush like crazy because you know she means it \

(side not but her doing this with the haven kids because their bio parents never said it to them AHH)

Days where Ruby needs to drag Nico away from the computer and just chill are a must. Probably a beach or a park or ice skating and just know that the other is with them and that everything is going to be okay. It also gives them some closure to know that the world CAN be calm, they just need to know where to look, and sometimes that's in each other.

(I’ll do a part two of them just being pals that's less depressing but i love their duo and I've never heard anyone talk about Nico like.., ever)

[thiswasinevitableid]

for monster march, ghost + indruck + nsfw?

Here you go! I borrowed some ideas we’ve tossed around on the Discord

A sketchbook, new pens, a Hershey bar, and a bag of jumbo marshmallows. A small but lively fire. And a new, huge, fuzzy sleeping bag waiting for him in the tent. 

Not a bad camping set up for a city-boy art goth (as Barclay likes to call him).

Indrid sticks another marshmallow on the fork, roasting it until it’s deep brown, the smell of burning sugar curling through the air and settling in his hair. He’s never liked Graham Crackers, so he jams a square of chocolate into the molten center of the marshmallow and shoves the entire thing into his mouth. 

Kepler is small. Barclay hadn’t been kidding about that. He’d also been right that one of the two tattoo shops in town was willing to hire Indrid after looking through photos of his work and confirming he completed his apprenticeship. 

He’s been living in the Eastwoods campground in the Monongahela National Forest while he apartment hunts, and the tattoos he’s done so far netted him enough cash to buy his luxurious new sleeping bag. He might be waiting on a place for some time, so he may as well camp in style. 

Three “s’mores” later, the moon is up and the night is chilly enough that he wants his sweatshirt. Ducking into the tent, he can’t find it on his pillow, where he swears he left it this morning. Maybe he accidentally buried it getting dressed.

A splashhiss interrupts his rummaging. Scrambling from the tent, he discovers his fire is now a pile of soaked ashes and logs being angrily stirred by a thick piece of kindling. 

“Excuse me, but what the fuck?”

A man in a ranger uniform appears, the stick falling through his hand as he gives Indrid a disapproving stare. 

“Look here, I know you’re new here, maybe to campin entirely. But you can’t just leave a fire burnin when you go to bed.” He doesn’t sound mad, more like he’s a disappointed big brother scolding his sibling. 

“I wasn’t-”

“And all this” he gestures to the food on the table, “has gotta go in the bear box. Black bears are real good foragers and we don’t want ‘em comin’ into camp and gettin to comfy around humans.”

“Of course, but-”

“You didn’t take any food into the tent, right? Wouldn’t want somethin to decide to join you ‘cause it smelled a snack.”

Indrid pinches the bridge of his nose, “I am aware of all of these rules, and plan to follow them. Once I actually go to bed instead of ducking into the tent for my sweater. But since my evening appears to be over…” he grabs the marshmallows, roasting fork, and chocolate, carries them to the bear box, and slams it closed. 

When he whirls back around, the ghost is still there, chagrined. 

“Uh, sorry. I kinda jumpy about people leavin fires alone.” In the lantern light, his smile is as charming as his drawl. His stocky, bearish shape and unassumingly handsome face command Indrid’s focus, which is why his revelation comes so quickly. 

“You...there’s a statue of you at the visitor center. Which makes you, ah, damn it what was the name-”

“Duck. Duck Newton. They put my legal name on there, even though Juno tried to stop ‘em. But my name’s Duck.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Duck. I’m Indrid.”

“Nice to meet you too. Uh, sorry for ruinin your campfire, looks like you were havin a nice time.”

“It’s alright. I suppose I’m grateful there’s someone haunting the campsites to keep them in order.”

“You’re takin me bein’ a ghost surprisingly well.”

“I’ve always been interested in strange things, to the point that I earned the nickname ‘mothman’ in high school.”

“Huh” Duck watches him a moment, then shrugs, “well, guess I better be goin’. Have a nice night, mothman.”

With that, he’s gone.

------------------------------------------------------

“Hello again.” Indrid says as the campfire smoke curls around a human form, “Doing your rounds?”

“More or less. I like my job, and ain’t about to give it up just because I beefed it and turned into a ghost.” A creak as Duck joins him on the picnic bench. When he materializes, he floats slightly above the worn wood, watching Indrid draw. 

“That’s incredible, it’s so realistic it’s like you pressed the leaves into the pages instead of colored them.”

“Thank you.” adds depth to the leaf, “you know, I looked at the statue again today. It hardly does you justice.”

From this close, he can see a blush spread up semi-opaque cheeks. Then he starts fading.

“Oh, ah, I’m sorry. I was aiming for a benign compliment, not to make you uncomfortable.”

“S’alright, just surprised me. Not many folks wanna flirt with a dead guy.”

“I’m more interested in what the ‘dead guy’ wants.” Indrid smiles, hoping to convey he would submit to spectral touches as readily as he’d keep talking. 

Duck floats closer, “Kinda curious about your other drawin’s.”

Indrid turns the sketchbook back to the beginning, “they’re half portfolio and half travelogue. Here” he holds up a fade, detached piece of paper,  covered by an Morpho Butterfly that looks ready to fly away, “this is the first tattoo I ever designed.”

“Damn. Guessin’ that means you did this one” he touches the Rosy Maple Moth on Indrid’s forearm (or tries to). It’s chilly, but not in the way Indrid feared. More like taking a cool shower on a sweltering day.

“I did. Here, it gave me an idea for my first series of flash tattoos…”

They go over the illustrations page by page. Slowly, Indrid weaves in questions to Duck who, instead of recoiling from discussion of his mortal life, tells him rambling stories about the woods and which places serve the best food in town. 

The conversation doesn’t end until the fire goes out on it’s own, Duck standing automatically, grabbing a water bottle, swearing, and then disappearing so he can pick the bottle up. 

“Do you think that’s part of why you’re still here? Some unfinished business having to do with the woods?”

“Nah.” The water bottle thunks back on the table as Duck reappears, “I tried to live a normal life, improve the world the way I knew how, make some kind of difference to this town. Then I had to go play the goddamn hero.”

“I would say saving two dozen people from a forest fire makes a considerable difference in the world.”

A sad huff of a laugh, “Yeah, guess you’re right. Just...I meant to do somethin’ with my life, not my death, even if it was a small somethin’, and the closest thing I got to unfinished business is a model ship.”

“I...what?”

“It was four-masted and everything! I had Leo order it in special and everything and then I never, I never got to-”  He tilts his head up, sniffs once, “never mind. I better let you get to sleep.”

By the time Indrid calls “goodnight,” the ghost is gone. 

------------------------------------------

“Please tell me you’re gettin a place soon so you stop eatin everythin outta a can?” Leo bags the last of groceries.

“No such luck. Ah well, there are worse things than canned soup and Pop-Tarts.”

“At least let Barclay feed you, half the point of havin a friend who can cook is to let ‘em do it for you. You need stamps or anything?”

“N-” A box behind the counter catches his eye. It’s at an odd angle, as if whoever put it there is hoping no one will see it. Indrid can just make out an illustration of a four-masted ship.

“Is that for sale?”

Leo looks where he’s pointing, and for a moment something in his gruff affability wavers. Then he nods, “Yeah, suppose it is.”

“Can you ring it up for me?” Indrid nearly bounces on his toes when Leo sets the box on the counter and confirms his hunch. 

The older man sets a gentle hand on the cardboard, sliding it across to Indrid, “Don’t worry about that, kid. It’s yours.”

----------------------------------------------

“Duck?” Indrid turns in a circle by the picnic table, “Duck, I have something for you!”

He saw the ranger briefly last night, but he didn’t hang around. Gingerly, he sets the box on the table, tearing off a piece of sketch paper to write a note in case the ghost stops by while he’s asleep. 

“Holy fuck.” Duck floats across the table from him, “‘Drid, where did, how did--why?”

“Leo still had it. As for why I, ah, it seemed like you still wanted it. If you can douse a fire and over my camp stove, I figure you can build a model ship.”

Duck disappears and Indrid’s heart sinks; that must have been too much. Then he’s squished in an invisible, wonderful bear hug.

“Thanks, ‘Drid.”

From then on, Duck spends every night at his campsite, building the ship while Indrid draws, reads, or talks with him. The model lives in the safest corner of the tent during the day.

“I mean, I’m up durin the day too, but I scared a few folks on accident and I don’t want people avoid the forest because of me.”

Indrid also learns that Duck is stuck within a certain radius of where he died, and that his attempts to talk with Juno when she was in his part of the woods only lead to his friend thinking she was hallucinating and Duck feeling miserable for three solid days. Indrid offers to act as messenger and invite Duck’s friends (many of whom have, by chance and by proximity to Barclay, become his friends) to the campsite to see him. The ranger is quiet for some time after that offer.

“Not yet. Maybe someday, but not yet. I, it ain’t even been a year, ‘Drid. I think a lot of ‘em are still hurtin. And, and maybe this is selfish but...I ain’t ready to deal with them findin’ out I aint fully gone. It’d be so much all at once.”

Indrid doesn’t bring it up again. More than once, when Aubrey tells a story about Duck only for her eyes to sadden halfway through, or when he sees Juno looking at Duck’s statue a little too long, he struggles to keep his promise. 

A cold front blows into town and, since he’s still in the tent, he pops into Kepler Thrift N Find in search of an extra sweatshirt. Tucked in between one reading “Ranchos” and one with a picture of Garfield is a soft, well-loved hoodie with “Monongahela National Forest” on the front. He buys it and wears it home, the fact it’s loose in the arms making it even easier to tuck in his hands when he gets cold. 

He stops by the visitor center out of habit, checking out the new plush wild animals. There are also hints of Duck here and there; his name on displays, his face in group photos. As he contemplates a small, squishy black bear, he notices Juno looking at him more than usual.

“Hello again” he sets the bear on the counter.

“Howdy. This all?

“Yes, please. Are you alright? You look, ah, tired.”

“Yep. Or, uh, just noticed that sweatshirt. It was one that got made special for staff a few years ago.”

Indrid fidgets with the cat-bitten drawstring, “It was Duck’s, wasn’t it?”

“Uh huh. He put that patch on the sleeve. Guess it startled me to see it on someone else.”

“I understand.” 

“Knew him since we were kids. Hell, he’s my daughter’s godfather. Still don’t feel right, bein’ here without him.”

Indrid pushes the bear towards her and she pets it.

“What was he like?”

In the empty visitor center, Juno tells him. In her stories are echos of every conversation he’s ever had with anyone who knew Duck. When it’s time to close up, she asks if she can hug him, and thanks him for listening to her. 

“Guess you weren’t kiddin about wanting to sleep with a bear” Duck teases as Indrid sets his new purchase inside the tent. Indrid whaps at him, arm going through his torso. The ranger floats nearby as Indrid heats up ravioli and opens a can of Mountain Dew. Indrid tells him about the conversation with Juno. 

“Huh, guess that is my old one. Glad someone is gettin some use outta it. And it looks good on you.”

Indrid sets down his bowl, “We talked a lot, Duck. And it made me think about what you said to me one of the night after we met. You said you wanted a chance to make the world, the town, a little better. Everyone I’ve talked to, and I mean every one, has a story about you. How you helped them, how Kepler is worse off with you gone. You did so much, even with your time cut short. I, I wanted you to know that.”

The ghost looks away, “I wasn’t done tryin to help.”

“You still aren’t. You do what you can to keep the forest and the visitors safe. And you, you’ve made my life immeasurably better Duck. Seeing you is the best part of my day and I think I’m falling--ah, that is, you’re not done making a difference.”

Duck hasn’t moved since Indrid started talking about his feelings. When Indrid tries to meet his eyes, he disappears. Hurried, he reaches out to offer a reassuring touch and gets only air. 

“Duck?”

Nothing, even after he calls his name three more times.

He slumps onto the bench, “well, fuck me I guess.”

---------------------------------------------------

This is a terrible idea. But it’s his last, and therefore his best. 

Indrid even asked Barclay’s boyfriend, Joseph, if anything in his impressive library of the paranormal advised the reader on dealing with upset ghosts. A few did, always from the perspective of trying to get the specter to go away. They said nothing about what to do if your upset ghost was missing, leaving an ache in your heart you didn’t know you were capable of feeling. 

Instead, after a week of silence, Indrid changes tactics: if he can’t coax Duck back, maybe he can annoy him into appearing. 

Tonight, he finishes dinner and cleans his dishes, puts the bulk of the food in the bear box, and then tears open a bag of chips, scattering them across the table. He eats one, then leaves the open bag laying amongst the potato shards. 

Next, he dumps his remaining water on the fire, which takes it down to embers but does not extinguish it. When none of that gets a reaction, he decides to narrate.

“Hmm, that should be fine, it’s not that dry and I don’t think sparks can go over the edge.”

“Should I leave these juice pouches out? Yes, I think I should, in case I get thirsty at night. Maybe I’ll take one into the tent, just to be safe.”

He already feels silly and like no one is listening, and so he escalates. 

“I know I shouldn’t leave food out for the wildlife, but since there’s no handsome, ghostly ranger here to punish me for my transgressions, I am just going to leave some nuts out for the raccoons. I like raccoons. They deserve nice things. Hell, how about I just leave them a whole buffet since no one is stopping me!”

All he gets in reply are the few bugs awake this early in the spring and the crack of brush as a small mammal runs away from the weird bipedal thing yelling at his camp fire. He doesn’t leave out food for the raccoons; he climbs into his tent in a huff. What a bad idea, to think this of all things would bring Duck back to him. He’s being childish and bratty and selfish; Duck doesn’t deserve that, no more than he owes Indrid his company. 

He changes into his pajamas pants and sleep shirt, intending to go back out to make the site safe and tidy. Except.

Except something just opened the bear box. The chip bag crinkles and the fire hisses out a minute later. He should be running outside to apologize, but his mind has simultaneously  registered the full darkness of the night , the possibility that Duck is not the only paranormal thing in these woods, and the fact the nearest other campers are on the other side of the campground, meaning he is very, very alone.

The zipper on the tent moves, the flap falling open so his lantern shines on nothing but April air.

“Duck? Please say that’s you.”

A low chuckle, “It’s me, ‘Drid.” The fly zips shut, “mighty peeved about that trick you pulled.”

“I’m, I’m sorry. I missed you, but that was a bad way to communicate that.” He can’t see him, and the lantern only picks up the odd shift of sleeping bag or tent floor, so Indrid’s eyes’ dart about trying to pinpoint him.

“Oh, you communicated plenty, sugar. Like what you want a certain, uh, ghostly ranger to do to you.”

“Oh god” he winces, “please, forget I said that, it’s humiliating.”

“Not all that surprisin, truth be told. I mean, you and I flirted now and then. And you told me enough about yourself for me to suspect that you’re a kinky little weirdo who’s dyin to get fucked by a ghost.” 

“I, I feel I should point out that I only want to fuck one ghost. You. I want to fuck you and that means fucking a ghoOOOst.” He gasps as cold lips press into his neck.

“I can make that happen, darlin, all you gotta do is say it. You were a pain in the neck earlier, so now I expect you to be real polite and use your words.” Duck’s voice has never been like this before, rough and possessive yet still, under all of it, the same warmth draws Indrid in like a flame. 

“I want you, Duck.”

A bite to his ear, strong arms wrapping around his waist from behind him, “Want me to do what?”

“Fuck me” this is like every wet dream he had as a teenager, the supernatural being coming for a fellow outsider. 

That gets him a tender kiss on the cheek, “That’s better. Though, if I’m rememberin correctly, word you used was punish.”

Indrid yelps as Duck turns and shoves him to lay across his lap, kicks his legs out in surprise when his waistband slides down to his upper thighs. 

“Yesss” he wiggles his ass as Duck palms it, “yes, Duck, pleaseAHgod” the first strike stings, and Duck doesn’t let him recover before delivering five more, three to each side. His cock perks up at the pain. Stranger still, because Duck is invisible, all Indrid has to do is tilt his head to watch it harden and twitch with each slap.

Twenty strikes later Duck pauses, hand rubbing soothing, cool circles on the burning skin, “Learned your lesson?”

“Mmhmm.” Indrid presses an awkward kiss to Duck’s knee. 

“Glad to hear it.” Duck hauls him up onto his knees, slides a hand under his shirt and up his chest, “I’m rarin’ to feel more of you--holy fuck” 

“AH!” Indrid arches as Duck toys with his left nipple piercing, his other hand quickly finding the right. 

“God, fuck, you’re fuckin hot, if I were alive I woulda taken you home first time I saw you.” Messy kisses cover his neck as Duck tugs the piercings.

“Gaahnnyes, that’s, that’s very flattering.”

“Ain’t flattery, sugar, it’s the truth. Never could turn down some skinny punk with piercin’s and messy hair, not when I was a teen burnout hidin in the woods and sure as hell not now.” He moves Indrid onto his back, rucking up his shirt as his legs twist in his half-down pants. The ranger cups his face, and Indrid is positive he’s meeting his eyes, “tell me what you want sugar, tell me so I can treat you right.”

“Marks, I want marks anywhere you’ll give them.”

A growl from above him, then lips smashing into his, drinking him in before continuing down his throat, biting and sucking hard enough that he cries out every time. Duck pauses, teasing his nipples with his tongue as he rakes his nails up his sides. He sits up and for a horrible moment Indrid loses him. Then with glee he watches five red marks drag down his chest. He moans, rolling his hips and discovering just how closer Duck’s clothed cock is to his own. The contact only feeds the rangers eagerness, and Indrid is tosses and turns as he sucks, bites, and scratches, laying claim to the illustrated expanse of his body. 

“More, please, god that all feels so good.” 

“Don’t worry darlin, still got plenty of you to mark up, but we’re gonna do somethin else while I do.” He eases Indrid onto his stomach, slaps his ass fondly, “don’t go nowhere.”

Indrid’s duffel bag unzips, clothes and pens moved aside until a bottle of lube hovers in the air. The tube compresses and drips coat the rough outline of fingers. When the two digits press into him he sighs, eyes closing as he melts under Ducks watchful eyes. 

“That’s it ‘Drid, relax for me. Got well over a year of horny to work out, so this cute ass needs to be ready to take it.”

Indrid pushes his hips back in reply, taking as far as the fingers will go and whimpering excitedly when he presses in the tip of the third. Duck works that one more carefully, kissing Indrid’s face and shoulders as he whispers about how good he is, how much he’s wanted this.

“I want it too so for, for goodness sake please fuck me soon or I’ll leave my entire cooler out for the bears.”

“Only one bear in this campsite tonight darlin.” Duck laves his tongue down the base of his spine, bites down hard on his ass. Indrid’s still moaning from the pain when his cock pushes in.

“Fuuuckme that’s good. Shoulda snuck into your tent sooner, sugar, made you a fuckin cocksleeve you feel so fuckin good.”

“Ohgod” is all Indrid, voice muffled by the sleeping bag he’s biting, manages before Duck adjusts them so Indrid is on his knees. The ranger isn’t gentle, pounds into him like he’s nothing but a warm hole and chuckles whenever Indrid moans. 

“H-handprints, Duck, want hand prints GAHyesyesyes” he struggles to move in time with the ghost as the air fills with ear-splitting slaps. He’s so close, the pain and the sensation of phantom fingers claiming his body making his body beg for release. When he slides a hand down to jerk himself off, the arm twists up and stays trapped against his back. 

“You wanna cum, you know what to do.”

He blinks away the ecstatic tears, words raw in his throat, “Please let me cum, Duck. I want to, need to cum while you fuck me pleaseplease-” he cuts off into whine as the ghost works his cock hard, all the while jamming into him hard enough that the smooth fabric of the sleeping bag burns his knees. When he cums it’s with a weak cry of Duck’s name, which is swallowed up by hungry lips as Duck kisses him over and over, repeating Indrid’s name like an incantation as he pumps his hips and cums, pulling out as he does so it splatters on the reddened patches of his ass. 

A final kiss to the top of his head, and then there’s no contact between them and the zipper is moving.

“Oh no you don’t” Indrid scrambles, sweaty and exhausted, between the tent fly and the invisible man somewhere in front of him, “for goodness sake, Duck, I thought you liked me enough to at least let me fall asleep before you ran.”

The ranger finally appears, hair a mess and cheeks noticeably pink, “‘Drid, all that was amazing, but it’s all I can give you. I, I can’t...you said you were fallin for me and I can’t give you that.”

Indrid cocks his head, “Why not?”

“Because I’m a fuckin ghost, ‘Drid! You deserve to be with a livin’ fella, you deserve someone who can be a real part of your life.”

He crosses his arms, “Duck, you are a real part of my life. Honestly, what part of all the nights we spent together, all the ways we take care of each other, all of this” he points at the rumpled sleeping bag, “suggests otherwise?”

The ghost doesn’t speak, simply hugs himself (or tries to).

“If this is too much, if I’m offering something you do not want, then please tell me. But if this is you thinking that some paranormal quirks keep you from being a worthy partner for me, kindly think again.”

Duck disappears and Indrid is gearing up to try and tackle a supernatural entity when a familiar face buries itself in the crook of his neck. The ghost clings to him, and Indrid clings right back. 

“You really wanna give it a go?”

“More than anything.”

Duck lifts his head so their cheeks rest together, “Then fuck it. Let’s see what happens.”

----------------------------------------

Indrid finishes hooking up his lightly used Winnebago, AKA his solution to the lack of available apartments. He’s in a different section of Eastwoods, but he’s happy with his new spot. He opens one of his few boxes, gently lifts the completed model ship into a place of honor, and waits, humming happily, for an unseen hand to knock on his door. 

[the-13th-battalion]

⭐ have a star!!! For that one ask!!!

OK SORRY THIS TOOK ME A WHILE I really wanted to talk about chapter two of Where The Shadow Ends but I had to post it first skdkkskd

Here we go I have a lot of thoughts!!

He sighed wearily as he marched the perimeter of camp. His eyes passed over bunches of troopers huddled together in the mud, some of them lifting gaunt faces or giving him a salute. He tried to look past the battered men as he weaved through drooping, muddy tents and stepped around empty crates once filled to the brim with medical supplies and food. He prayed it was only more mud squelching in his boots, not blood, he had stepped in a lot of blood, too much blood-

He slammed his bucket back on his head. He swallowed against his nausea and forced his feet to keep moving, forced his eyes to keep searching.

Cody reached the other end of camp. He stopped and stared out at the smoke veiled wasteland, broken battle droids and hollow armor stacked in separate piles dotting the burnt landscape. Something quivered in his heart as he looked upon one of too many empty helmets. A blurry image of Obi-Wan's haunted eyes filled the blackened gaps.

He's not made for war. Not like us.

A more urgent thought followed. I have to find him.

He turned on his heel, as sharply as the mud would allow, and continued his circle.

I was talking with my friend about this before I started writing and she said "what if they were losing a battle" and I got this image of a vast, gray landscape covered in smoke and ash and blood, and all these piles of broken droids and neat rows of helmets and I was like "*crying* yup that'll work"

Also I will take EVERY opportunity to mention that Obi-Wan is too kind, too peaceful, for the violence and death he was given during the clone wars :( he didn't deserve any of it!

"Waxer and Boil are tending to the shinies."

This little section of dialogue from Cody is a random thought I had about the 212th. Waxer and Boil are the perfect ones to take over the care and feeding of shinies after their first battles. I can't imagine the absolute horror and grief these poor boys went through... they need some people like Waxer and Boil to talk them through anything bothering them, to help them breathe, to bundle them in blankets or give them food or whatever they need <3

He hesitated. Cody had shaken Obi-Wan from long meditations before, but this time felt different. Cody could practically see the weight resting on Obi-Wan's shoulders. He watched his eyes roam under his eyelids and his heart ached to imagine the horrors he might be reliving.

I can't let him do this alone.

This part here is a reference to a headcanon I share! Cody (and other people who love Obi-Wan) shake Obi-Wan out of long meditations because they're probably unhealthy! No one should spend so much time in their own thoughts, especially when it's most likely sad guilty thoughts :( also I imagine the Force is an ocean and one can actually drown in it...

Obi-Wan's eyes flew open and he let out a startled gasp. He grappled for a hold on Cody's arm, a grounding technique he recognized from watching Anakin interact with Obi-Wan. Cody unclipped his vambrace and allowed it to fall to the ground, giving Obi-Wan an easier grip. He waited as Obi-Wan took one, then two carefully calculated breaths.

This!! Right here!! Apart from being one of my favorite soft moments, this is a reference again to people shaking Obi out of long meditations. I bet Anakin does this more than anyone else, and I bet Cody has witnessed this. Anakin is probably no stranger to panic and needing to be grounded, so I headcanon that he created this method. Anyone who needs to be grounded can just grab hold of his arm. Obi probably has this as pure instinct now and just...grabbed Cody's arm, and then Cody was like "oh crap that's probably not comfy with my armor" and sdkdkks I'm getting sidetracked

Obi-Wan sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

Cody's chest tightened. Kriff it. I hope Fuzzy still has a stash of his migraine medication.

Honestly I wholeheartedly believe Obi-Wan gets migraines in canon. Also citing this gives me another excuse to yell about F U Z Z Y *sobbing*

"Yes, but sometimes, they are a glimpse of the future." Obi-Wan sighed. His hand went to the bridge of his nose again. "My master believed in visions and prophecies and such, but I never did, even though I had a recurring vision when I was a padawan. He had me seeing mind healers for it. He believed it was some sort of terrible premonition."

Cody imagined a much smaller, younger version of Obi-Wan in a huge chair, his freckled nose crinkled in indignation and his little arms crossed. He began to smile. "What did you think?"

"I thought it was just a nightmare."

This is a nod to the first chapter, but also mostly to headcanons I share about Obi's struggles with visions as a child. I think about it a lot, mostly because it's super dramatic and we all know I'm extremely dramatic lol

also I wanted an excuse to write in angry baby Obi in a big chair

Obi-Wan's smile faded too quickly. He stared down at his free hand, fingers absently twisting in the hem of his tunic. "They're all counting on me, Cody. They're all relying on me to lead them safely through hell. They trust me, and I can't let them down, but sometimes I look at their faces and the weight of that responsibility nearly crushes me."

The admission hung in the air for several heartbeats before Cody spoke. "Permission to speak freely, sir?"

"Granted," came the immediate reply.

"You were not made for this war, but what you've done in it, what you continue to do, is incredible. You have inspired so many people to stand and fight for a peaceful future. You have brought light to the darkest places and joy to the most sorrowful hearts. That's what they see, that's what I see. That's why we trust you. We see a man who fights for truth and justice, but fights with honor and mercy. A man who would lay down his life for a stranger. A man who genuinely cares for the people in this galaxy, for the people he loves."

Back when this fic was just an idea, I was bouncing ideas off my friend and she suggested a part about Obi-Wan discussing the pressure he feels in his position as a general and like a hundred other jobs. I loved it, and it morphed into THIS.

I'm not saying Cody's simping, but Cody's simping.

The storm in Obi-Wan's eyes calmed. "That's rather poetic of you."

Cody's cheeks reddened. "Ah...you left your datapad open once. You were reading poetry when you fell asleep. It...caught my eye."

Obi-Wan laughed. "I'm glad someone else enjoys a good poem. You know, poetry should be read aloud. Perhaps I should read some sometime, to you and the others."

Cody smiled. "That would be nice."

LISTEN!! OBI-WAN READS POETRY!!! He's such a poetry kind of guy HONESTLY

As Obi-Wan's gentle voice lifted into the night air, many of the troopers huddled together to sleep under shared blankets on what patches of dry ground they could find. His voice carried across the camp. Hundreds of hearts beat in unison as the words filled their heads and peace flooded their veins.

Cody fell asleep with his cheek resting on Obi-Wan's tousled hair, lulled by hushed lines of poetry in a Coruscanti accent. Obi-Wan drifted off not long after, his head on Cody's shoulder, their fingers still entwined.

LET THE 212TH CUDDLE 2021

Also I wrote that last paragraph before I wrote most of this fic so like I was leading up to this the whole time... they deserve the hugs <3

THIS WAS REALLY LONG OOPS anyway those are my thoughts :)

[lu-undy]

Hi! ♥️ How about... Spy and Snipes have a picnic in the forest and things get spicy? I love picnics and forests

Hey there! I hope you’re alright. Here it is :D I hope you’ll like it!

Mundy was familiar with long road trips but Lucien, much less so. That explained why in the middle of the day and even though he was sitting next to his lover, Lucien had fallen asleep. Mundy cast a glance over him, the road in front of him being as empty as it could be, and saw Lucien sleeping peacefully and silently. 

In fact, Lucien slept so silently that Mundy sometimes wondered whether he still breathed or not. But he had tested it countless times and yes, Lucien was just being as he was at work, extremely silent.

Mundy smiled. Seeing his lover asleep was so endearing. No one, especially not the members of the opposite team, could imagine that the silent and sneaky assassin could look that defenseless. 

Mundy saw a bit of sweat on his lover's brow so he opened the window just enough for a gentle breeze to cool him down. Lucien's grey lock of hair at the front waved under the soft wind and he soon opened his eyes. 

"Oh, I fell asleep…"

"Again, yeah." 

Lucien rubbed his eyes gently to wake up completely. 

"How long have you been driving? I hope you did take a break. And you are sure you don't want to let me drive a bit?"

Mundy smiled sweetly. He put his hand against Lucien's cheek and the Frenchman leaned in to get more of the touch. He was maskless and thus, felt all the warmth from Mundy's palm.

"Don't worry, we're almost there." 

"But you must be tired, non?" 

"Nah, not when I'm drivin' for you."

Lucien smiled in Mundy's hand. 

"Je t'aime."

[I love you.]

"So do I. But yeah, look, green." Mundy pointed at the forest in the distance. 

"Is that where you are taking me?"

"Yeah, it's a very vast forest. Not many people go there and there's even a lake, quite pretty to be honest." 

"Oh… Thank you." 

Mundy's hand slid down to Lucien's slim thigh. 

"You're welcome. It's been a long time since I wanted to take you there and I figured we could spend the weekend just you and me, the trees, fresh air..." 

"Whenever and wherever you want, as long as I am with you." Lucien answered and put his hand on Mundy's. 

About an hour later, Mundy parked the van and both stepped out. They took a couple of minutes stretching under the shade of the tree leaves. 

"Mon Dieu… How long did you drive for in the end?" 

Mundy opened the van's backdoor and slipped in to retrieve two backpacks. He handed one to Lucien who put it on his back without protesting.

"About five, maybe six hours." 

They shut the van's door and Mundy took Lucien by the hand. 

"Mon Dieu! And how many breaks did you take?" 

"Three I think."

Mundy started walking, his gloved hand in Lucien's who had removed part of his uniform to just stay in his white shirt and tie, as well as his red striped trousers.

"Did you stretch like I asked you?"

"Well…" 

Lucien saw in Mundy's hesitation that the answer to his question was no. 

"But Mundy, I told you to, it's important to get your blood flowing once every couple of hours."

"I know but… I couldn't leave you alone in the van."

"I was asleep, what did you imagine, that I was faking it and I would run away with your van?" 

"No, nah, it just felt wrong. So whenever I stopped, I just drank a bit of water and watched you sleep. I also tried to undo your tie to make you more comfy, but I was too scared I'd wake you up, knowing how light your sleep is." 

"And I did wake up."

"Did you? Argh, bugger, I'm sorry…"

Lucien stopped walking for an instant and smiled. 

"Don't apologise, you looked adorable with your eyes crossing and your tongue sticking out…" Lucien smirked.

"Oi, I didn't do any of that!" Mundy blushed and resumed their stroll. 

"Oui, you did, I saw you."

"Your eyes were closed!"

"Not entirely."

Mundy grumbled in shame while Lucien chuckled. 

"Aw, it is fine, I will let you undo my tie later if you want."

Mundy glanced down at Lucien who winked at him in a malicious way. 

"Unless you don't want to…?"

"W-what? No, no I-I'd love to!"

Mundy bit his lip at what bursted out of his lips and Lucien's smile widened. He didn't look up at the man whose cheeks turned crimson, to not embarrass him further. 

"Oh, is that the lake that you mentioned?" 

"Yeah, that's the one."

"It's very large and very calm. I can't see anyone around it." 

"Yeah…"

They took a minute to appreciate the view, the lake was spread before their eyes, its colour blue or rather turquoise. Lucien leaned in to Mundy's side and he laced an arm around him. 

"Let's find somewhere calm and in the shade." Mundy said as he resumed their walk.

"I am following you." 

They managed to find a weeping willow quite close to the shore of the lake and both got to work. Mundy smiled as he saw Lucien roll up his sleeves and try to assemble their tent. 

"Let me help you, luv'." 

"Non, I want to try on my own first, please."

"You sure?"

"Oui. You drove for hours, the least I could do is build the tent." 

"Alright," Mundy bent down and left a kiss behind his lover's neck. "I'll have a look around, see if I can find us something to grill for tonight."

"Fine."

Mundy took the bow and quiver that was tied to his backpack. 

"Mundy?" 

"Yeah?" 

And Mundy saw the most beautiful light blue irises on him. 

"Be careful, d'accord?"

[Alright?]

He smiled. 

"Of course, although you look like you're fighting against the tent... It shouldn't take me more than half an hour. You stay safe too, ok?" 

Lucien nodded as Mundy started heading further from the lake.

"And don't lose your fight with the tent, eh?" He added with a chuckle. Lucien answered by rolling his eyes and shooing him away and leave him to focus. 

And Mundy disappeared in the trees. Lucien spread all the bits for the tent on the ground and looked at them each intensely, trying to visualise the final product and how could he get there. 

Meanwhile, Mundy was walking as silently as he could, his ears pricked up and his senses all standing at attention. He wasn't looking for anything too big as it was only to share between Lucien and him. So he let the occasional deer or boar pass by without going for them. It was only when a rabbit stood up, with his ears pointing straight, that Mundy took an arrow from his quiver and readied himself. He knew he didn't have much time before the rabbit would flee. He held his breath and pulled the string of the arrow back. 

Steady, steady…

Mundy let the string fly go and the arrow flew straight, splitting the still air below the natural foliage ceiling. It pierced the rabbit's skull and the small creature collapsed on the ground. 

"Aces!" 

Mundy went to retrieve his game and headed back to where he left Lucien and the backpacks. It took him a few minutes and soon, he saw the small camp. 

"Lu'? Darl', that's amazing!"

Not only did he settle the tent but he also lit a small fire next to it. He had found a log that he managed to roll next to it too for them both to sit on. 

"Where did you learn all that?" 

"Same as for my knife techniques, during my time in the army."

Mundy put his hunting equipment down and sat by Lucien. 

"Your time in the army? You served in the army?" 

"The secret services are a branch of the army, oui, and as such, part of my training was done with soldiers. That's where I learnt how to make a fire and other survival skills." 

"Did you learn how to deal with that?" 

Mundy handed him the rabbit as he pulled the arrow out of it. Lucien removed his gloves and took it as he tilted his head on the side. 

"It is not dead yet." 

He flipped his blade open as he took it off his breast pocket and quickly ended the poor creature's suffering. 

"And to answer your question, may I try?" 

"Yeah, go ahead, I'll sit here and watch." 

Lucien took the flapping end of his tie and threw it behind his neck before starting to remove the rabbit's fur. Mundy watched closely as he saw him open it and empty it of its guts. 

"Hm…" 

Lucien looked left and right. He went a bit further away, his hand holding the rabbit's insides. Mundy saw him dig a hole with his blade before pouring them in and covering it back with the dirt. He then washed his blade in the lake a few feet away from Mundy and sat back. Then, Lucien started cutting the rabbit's legs and its head neatly. 

"Look at you go… You know how to deal with things here much better than I thought you would!"

"Just because I wear a suit does not mean that I do not enjoy being in a forest, or I can't enjoy nature, more broadly speaking."

"Yeah, but there's a difference between enjoying and knowing how to deal with it." 

"You are right." 

"And in any case, you never showed or talked about all these things. I just thought you were a city man and I'd have to show you everything." 

Lucien heard a hint of disappointment in Mundy's voice. 

"Oh… I'm sorry, mon amour."

[My love.]

"No, no, it's fine, I just… I thought I'd share more what I know with you but turns out you know as much as I do…" 

"Non, there are things I do not know, one that I want you to show me in particular." 

Mundy's eyes lit up. 

"Yeah, what is it?" 

"I will tell you after dinner." 

"Alright."

"Also, here, I have finished cutting the rabbit. Do you want to grill it for us?" 

"Yeah, give it to, me… Cool, thanks, luv', I'll get busy with it."

"Thank you, I will wash my hands in the lake meanwhile." 

Soon after, Lucien was leaning on Mundy's shoulder as he was making sure that the rabbit's legs were grilling nicely. The sky slowly turned darker and the temperature started dropping but their dinner warmed them up nicely. 

"You were right." Lucien said as they both started their dinner.

"About what?"

"I haven't seen a single person walking around here." 

"Yeah, not a lot of folks come here. It's quite far from any city. I guess people don't like to drive a lot. Hm, this bit here grilled nicely, take a bite."

Mundy held the rabbit's leg in front of Lucien's mouth and he bit in.

"Hm, it's very hot, Mundy!" Lucien fanned himself and chewed quickly.

"Oh, sorry love, I should have said…"

Lucien gulped it down. 

"Non, it's fine. And you were right, that bit was excellent."

"Here, take it."

"Non, non, I can't."

"Yeah, you can, just take it."

"Non, we share, please."

"Alright, c'mere…" Mundy took a bite and held it in front of Lucien's mouth for him to bit again. "And what were you sayin' about the forest…?"

"That it is really peaceful."

"Yeah." 

An owl hooted in the distance and they could only hear the wind brushing the branches and the leaves of the weeping willow under which they had settled. 

"Like the rabbit?" 

"Oui, it lacks a few spices but -"

"Oh, right, yeah, let me ask the squirrels in the forest, maybe they can lend me some, eh?"

"Mundy...?"

"Or maybe that deer I saw earlier, maybe he was carrying some herbs or somethin', I forgot to ask!"

"Hey!" 

Lucien nudged him with his elbow. 

"I was simply making suggestions for next time!"

"I know, but I love seeing that face you make when I tease you." Mundy scooted over to stick himself to Lucien. "You wrinkle up your nose and yer eyes shine and… Oh, uh, look, we finished this bit. Want more?" 

"Non, I am full, thank you."

"Right, I'll put the fire out…"

Lucien washed his hands in the lake while Mundy made sure the fire was dead.

"Alright, I'm done with the fire." 

Lucien was already in the tent and Mundy slipped in. 

"Oh, you laid out the cover and prepared everything already?" 

Lucien switched on the torch and Mundy smiled. He saw Lucien lying on his side with his head propped on his hand. 

"Why the smile?" Lucien asked.

"I don't know, you just look nice." Mundy dived to Lucien's lips. 

"I do pay attention to my looks." 

"Oh, I know… Mister I-have-as-many-creams-as-a-sheila…!"

"Hey! If I hadn't, your lips would still be constantly chapped and your hands would never be as hydrated as they are now!"

"Yeah, yeah…" Mundy pressed his lips on Lucien again, his hand brushing his side. "But tell me…"

"Oui?" 

Mundy looked Lucien in the eye.

"What did you want me to show you?" 

"First, I have a promise to keep, mon amour."

[My love.]

"Oh, what promise?" 

"I have to let you undo my tie." 

Mundy's eyes flashed in the dimness of the tent and Lucien saw it, his lips pursed in a smile. 

"Ah, yeah, you do, I had almost forgotten, c'mere…" 

Lucien raised his head slightly, still lying on his side while Mundy was on his stomach, struggling to undo the knot. 

"Do you need some help?" 

"Nah…"

"I would suggest lifting my collar first, to have better access."

"Ah, yeah." Mundy followed Lucien's advice.

"Now, try without closing one eye. You are not aiming through a scope, closing one eye won't zoom in on my neck!" Lucien said chuckling.

"Oi, I'm just - it's a reflex, ok? Like you, you see a back and I guess you want to stab it, don't you?"

"Not if it's yours, then I just want to scratch it." 

Mundy blushed. Lucien had a way to make his voice push the meaning of his words powerfully. He had spoken slowly and softly, his seductive accent a bit stronger than usual, just what it needed for Mundy's ears to burn…

"Are you sure you don't need any help?"

"Nah, I'll do it… I just need to figure out which bit I need to pull on… And it's quite dark… Oh! Gotcha!" 

Mundy pulled and the soft fabric on the tie slid against Lucien's collar. 

"Well done." 

"Thanks, darl'." Mundy pushed himself forward to kiss his lover again, putting a hand behind his neck to pull him in more. "But wait - " Mundy interrupted the kiss again. "You still haven't told me what you want me to show you." 

"Can't you guess…?" Lucien answered, an eyebrow raised like an invitation. He turned the light of the torch to be lower and under the red tent, the light glowed in pink. Only their eyes cut through it. Very light blue for one, lagoon blue for the other. 

"Removing my tie was only the first step." Lucien rolled to be on top of Mundy. He kissed him passionately, running his fingers through his hair while feeling Mundy's brushing his sides. 

"I want you…"

There was a kiss. 

"To show me…"

Their lips met and parted in a lapping noise. 

"How you would…"

Mundy pulled Lucien against him harder. 

"Make love to me here." 

Mundy's eyes snapped wide. 

"W-what? What d'you mean?" 

Lucien put his forehead on Mundy's. 

"I have never had a story so meaningful with someone that I accepted for them to take me where they want, as a surprise, without me knowing. I distrust people way too much for that." Lucien explained. 

"And yet you're in this tent, in a forest, by a lake with me." 

"Oui. You are different. You know me." Lucien explained as he caressed Mundy's face, his eyebrow, his nose and his lips. "You know me and me, I…" He sighed. "May I say it in French, please?" 

"Yeah, but slowly."

"Je t'aime, pour de vrai. Je sais que ça n'est absolument pas professionnel et que tu ne ressens sûrement pas la même chose mais… Quand je te dis que je t'aime, je t'aime vraiment."

[I love you, for real. I know that it is absolutely not professional and that you surely do not feel the same way but… When I say that I love you, I mean it, for real.]

Mundy's breath had cut short and sharp. He blushed beyond red and he didn't know what to say, how to answer. 

"I know that this entire, uh, adventure of ours only started because of, well, physical needs, but I think I owe you the truth Mundy."

"I…" 

Mundy was at a loss for words. He simply pulled Lucien to himself and hugged him dearly. Now that he wasn't staring into his eyes, he whispered. 

"I think I love you for real too. I don't know… I just don't want you to go anywhere without me, I want to see you smile, I want to be there for you."

Mundy felt Lucien kiss his neck and bury his head deeper in his neck. 

"And you've never been camping before?" 

"Non, not with someone I love."

"Lu'? Look at me for a minute." 

Lucien did as he was told and Mundy cupped his face. 

"I've never lied when I said I love you."

"You never say it." Lucien said and Mundy's eyebrows jumped. "It's always me saying it to you and you saying 'me too', but you never say it yourself…" 

"Hey, luv'..."

Lucien's eyes locked onto Mundy's deep blue irises. 

"I love you. I adore you. I'm mad about you and I think… You're wrong."

Lucien's eyebrows jumped in surprise. 

"I didn't just spend moments with you for eh, y'know… the physical needs. I've been in love with you since day one."

"Quoi?!"

[What?!]

Mundy's thumbs were brushing Lucien's cheeks. 

"Yeah, I was just… I didn't know if I should tell you or not so I pretended I didn't love you b-but in fact I really do."

Lucien closed his eyes and put his forehead on Mundy's. 

"Je t'aime."

[I love you.]

"I've been lovin' you forever and uh… Lu'?"

Lucien opened his eyes. 

"If tonight is our first uh, real night… I'll make you remember it."

Mundy rolled so that he was now towering Lucien. He kissed his lips, his tongue lasciviously darting in and out, breaking Lucien's breath and taking it away. At the same time, Mundy pulled Lucien's shirt apart. Some buttons flew but neither of them cared, especially not Lucien who was feeling overwhelmed. Mundy yanked his polo shirt up and out of the way while Lucien got rid of his shirt and tanktop he was wearing underneath. 

As soon as he was done, Mundy took Lucien's hands in his and pinned them to the ground, right and left from his head. Their fingers slid between each other's and Mundy's lips travelled down Lucien's neck. He started biting and growling. It needed to be as intense as him realising that he loved Lucien not just with his lust but with everything else. 

"Gosh I love you…"

He lapped at the skin under Lucien's ear. 

"I bloody love you…"

He bit again and Lucien bit his lip to suppress a cry. 

"You hear me? I love you, and I want you so much…"

Mundy's mouth moved down, his fingers still clenched around Lucien's and he spent some time on his chest. He licked the deep pink skin there, his tongue swirling around it. 

"You make me want you so damn much…"

He bit again and Lucien's body jerked up with a high-pitched moan. 

"Hm… You like it…?" 

Lucien managed to free his hands from Mundy's and he grasped his hair powerfully between his fingers.

"I love you too… Mon Dieu…" 

[My God…]

Lucien's hips started to move on their own, grinding into nothing. Mundy slithered down his stomach and abdomen, planting kisses along the skin that tickled Lucien slightly. He finally met with his belt that he undid with one hand, while his other one removed his own. They took as little time as possible to remove their trousers and underwear, and when they were done, Lucien pulled Mundy back on top of him and locked his lips on his. 

Their legs brushed and mingled. Lucien was holding Mundy's cheeks as he added the French to the kiss in his usual slow and seductive manner. That just made Mundy sweat more and be more eager and Lucien felt Mundy's masculinity twitch against his abdomen. 

Their moans wrapped them safe in the intimacy of the pink glowing tent and behind the curtain of the weeping willow's branches, following the night breeze. 

Thank God no one was around as their shadows against the tent's fabric didn't leave any doubt about what was happening inside.

A tall man with rather square shoulder slowly sunk down on the other man's masculinity. He growled without restraint as he felt filled more and more, until he had it all in and was now sat on the other's pelvis. He bent down and kissed the man below him, whose moans were more subtle but higher in pitch, before he started rolling his hips. It started slowly to not hurt, for him to get used to the feeling again and find the right angle. But once he did, the picked up the pace and both their moans grew louder and to the rhythm of the thrusts. 

Their chests were against each other, sliding easily because of the sweat, as Mundy put his hands on Lucien's neck, to get some leverage. 

"Mon Dieu… Mundy… Awh!"

"Yeah, God you feel so good… Gnh!" 

Mundy's thrusts didn't stop. He grinded his hips as they held each other as close as possible, whispering in the other's ears all that they hadn't before, because they feared it would put an end to their story. 

"I love you Lucien, I am in love with you, I thought… I thought I only liked it… When we - oorh! - when we just have a moment, here and there, but no - God that feels amazin' - I think I really love you…"

"And I tried to only like you - be careful, don't hurt yourself, awh! - I tried to pretend, I tried not to say that I loved you, I tried - Awh, oui, oui that feels good - I tried to tone it down with my ridiculous sentimentality but I couldn't - hmm!" 

Lucien put his hands on Mundy's backside, his fingers digging in the flesh, and the Aussie growled loudly in his ear. Shivers ran up his spine to his mouth and the tip of his fingers. 

"Please, Lu, please…"

"Oui?" 

"Touch me, I'm close - oh God!"

Their breaths were heavy and heated. Lucien's hand slid down in the space between their chests and found Mundy's aching member. 

"Oh yeah, yeah, please… Oh my God…" 

Mundy felt overwhelmed and slowed down on his thrusts to better appreciate everything. Lucien started jerking his hips on his own as he too was approaching his climax. 

"Mundy, your lips, please - awh!"

Mundy what that meant. He had never experienced it with anyone else before but Lucien needed to kiss when he reached his peak, he loved to feel Mundy's arms wrapping around him while his body collapsed. 

"Hmm!"

"Oh ye - ah!"

Mundy stuck himself to Lucien and pulled him impossibly close to himself while Lucien's hand steadied on Mundy's end. Their bodies shook as they moaned and groaned, the heat becoming unbearable and necessary at the same time. 

And after a moment, they were just lying, Mundy on top of Lucien, spent and exhausted beyond was words could express, panting and catching their breaths. Mundy felt Lucien's masculinity still occasionally twitch inside him, and each time it did, he smiled in his head, because he didn't have the strength to smile for real.

"Mundy?" 

"Yeah?"

Both had their eyes closed and Mundy's head was buried in Lucien's neck. Their hair was damp with sweat. 

"You will think that I am mad, out of my mind, and quite possibly senile."

Mundy frowned. 

"But I need to say it again: I love you."

"I love you too… And I'm as mad and out of my mind and all for you." 

They both chuckled and slowly opened their eyes. Mundy withdrew from Lucien and laid next to him. They kissed each other but now it was wet and sloppy, slow too. They needed a moment of sweetness after all these efforts. 

"You're gorgeous." 

Lucien's eyes opened up and snapped wide. He felt his ears get hot. 

"I think I never told you before, but you really are gorgeous." Mundy repeated and Lucien smiled oh so sweetly. 

"And you have no idea what fashion or elegance is, but that only makes me want you more. Your beauty is natural, your touch is rough, your skin tanned by the sun… Hmm… You are delicious." 

Mundy put his hand on Lucien's hip and pulled him closer to kiss him. 

"I didn't know you liked your men like that, eh?"

"Neither did I." Lucien admitted. "But I look at you now and cannot see anything else."

Their lips met. Mundy took Lucien's bottom lip and pulled on it gently, which made the Frenchman smile and moan, or sing, to Mundy's ears it was the same. 

"Hey, Lu'?" 

"Hm?" 

"What do you say to going in the lake?"

"Now? It's the middle of the night."

"Yeah, but we both need a good wash and… No one's around, luv'." 

"Oui but we won't see a thing in the night?"

"I'll take the torch out and put it to the max, you'll see it's pretty damn powerful. Also, I didn't know you were scared of the dark, eh?"

"I'm not, I just want to be able to see."

"What?"

"Your naked body."

"Haven't you seen it enough?" Mundy asked. 

"Never." 

They quickly kissed and got out of the tent with the torch. Mundy cranked up its power to the maximum and indeed, it shone at least as brightly as a car light. He took Lucien by the hand and both entered the water. When they were sufficiently deep, Mundy pulled Lucien against his chest and kissed behind his neck. 

"Lu?" 

"Oui?" 

"I love you, I really do." 

Mundy wrapped his arms around Lucien's sides and they stuck their cheeks against each other. Both smiled. It had been hard to keep that secret but completely worth it. 

[ilooklikeaburntchickenugget]

Summer Love: Chapter One

A/N: I’m pretty sure I just woke up this morning with this idea of ‘what if I did a high school AU Gerard x Reader at an artsy summer camp?’ so yeah, here you go. Pairing: Gerard Way x F!Reader (High school AU) Word count: 2687

After a long and harsh school year you were finally able to go and experience your favorite part of summer: sleep away camp.

Having just wrapped up your sophomore year filled with honors and AP classes amongst electives and extracurriculars which were all art, you were ready as ever to get a break from the hectic schedule of school. And sleep away camp meant just that.  

Camp Peterson was one of the elite camps in Jersey. It specialized in students who excelled in art, and helped them expand their skills greatly. This was perfect for you with your love of painting and sketching.

“Y/N?” You heard a familiar voice behind you.

“Mel?” You asked, whipping around despite the bags you were holding. There was your purple haired, nose pierces, best sleep away camp friend who you had known since sixth grade. She squealed, running up to you and giving you an anxious hug.

“Ugh, I missed you!” She smiled.

“I missed you too.” You hugged back.

“Damn,” She said, looking you up and down and pulling away, “You glew up.” “I did?” You asked. Sure, you had lost a few pounds, and cut and dyed your hair (bleached it just because), but you didn’t think it was a whole glow up situation.

“Are you kidding? I could barely recognize you!” You smiled.

“Thanks.” You said. She helped your carry your bags to cabin 17, the one you had been staying in for all your years. Setting your bags down on your side of the room by your twin bed, you looked around. It hadn’t changed a bit.

Because you and she were frequent campers who came every year the dean let you two keep your cabin and decorate it, promising that after your senior year you would come back and take it all down.

“C’mon, let’s go see the boys.” Mel said, looking at you.

“But I haven’t put my stuff away-” “So, we have another like hour to do that.” You sighed, going along with her to Cabin 18, your next door neighbors. You two ran up the small wooden steps and knocked on the door. Immediately, Mikey answered.

“Y/N? Mel?” He asked, looking at you two, “It’s been so long!” He smiled, giving you each a hug.

“Hey Mikes.” Mel said, “How are you?” “A lot better now that my best friends are here.” “Hey! I though I was your best friend!” You heard Frank walk up to the door, “Oh, hey fuckers.” He smiled at you two.

“Shut up Frank.” Mel fired back, “You’re a bitch.” “Well you’re a whore.” He said, looking at you right after, “Seems like nothing has changed.” But then he looked at you, “Oh, wait, Y/N got hot.” You lightly blushed. “But you’re still so shy and innocent. We’ll fix that, don’t you worry.” The boys let you into their cabin where you each sat down on a bean bag. There room was filled with posters of bands like The Smashing Pumpkins and The Misfits, and included Mikey’s old CD player which you guys would use almost every night.

“Nothing’s changed around here, huh?” You asked.

“You ask that every year and the answer is always no.” Frank responded. You shrugged. “Wait, actually something has changed.” He looked to Mikey to continue. Both you and Mel furrowed your brows.

“Oh yeah, my brother Gerard?” You both nodded knowing Mikey had talked about him before, “He’s here this year. He sobered up and so Mom let him come.” “Oh, cool.” Mel said.

“He’s in Ray’s cabin.” Frank added.

“I thought Bob was in Ray’s cabin?” “He couldn’t come this year.” Mikey explained, “Some sort of family vacation.” “For six weeks?” “Dunno,” Mikey concluded, “That’s what he told me.”

“We should probably go check on them.” Frank added. You all nodded.

The four of you walked out of the cabin and to number 9, Ray’s and now Gerard’s. Frank knocked on the door, no answer. He knocked again, this time harder. “Just a minute!” You heard Ray yell before coming a few seconds later and greeting you all with a smile.

“If you two were fucking in there already-” Frank said and Ray rolled his eyes.

“Grow up.” He told Frank, letting you guys in. You noticed a black haired boy sitting on one of the beds, what looked to be a comic book in hand. He was focused on the pages, while you were focused on his ruffled hair and strong jawline that shaped into a U. His hair went right above his shoulder, ruffled all over the place.

“Hey, Gee.” You heard Mikey greet. So this was Gerard.

“Oh, hey.” He smiled, looking up.

“These are the people we hang out with.” Ray began, going down the line, “Frank, Melanie, or Mel, and Y/N, or Y/N/N.” You nodded and smiled as he looked over all of you. You noticed how his hazel eyes grazed over you a little longer, or maybe you were just hallucinating.

“Wait, Y/N/N.” Ray took your out of your trance.

“Hm?” You asked, looking up at him. “You got-” He couldn’t find the right word.

“Hot?” Frank finished, “Yeah, we all know.” Ray rolled his eyes.

“That wasn’t exactly the word but you look more mature.” Ray concluded.

“Thanks.” You said, “I’ll take that as a compliment.”

“Also you’re hair, it looks awesome.”

“Thanks.” You replied to that too.

“Hi, I’m Gerard.” He reached his hand out which you shook, “But you can call me Gee.” “I’m Y/N,” You smiled, “But you can call me Y/N/N.”

He went around and introduced himself before Mel and you headed back to put your stuff away. You placed all your clothes neatly into the drawers, hanging up some of your Christmas lights around the room. Right as you were finishing up and putting your duffel bag under your bed, you heard a knock at the door before Frank came barging in and ran to your freshly made bed, crashing on it. “Really?” You asked. “I just made that.” “So?” He asked, “I’m just making it more comfy.” “Sure you are.” The other three came in too, Mikey sitting on the edge of Mel’s bed and the Ray sitting on one of the beanbags. You noticed Gerard looking at your filled bookshelf, which was a mixture of classics and comic books. Everyone began talking but you decided to go and greet him.

“Hey, Gee.” You smiled and stood next to him, he looked up at you and smiled.

“Hey, Y/N/N.” He replied.

“What’re you looking at?” You lightly laughed, knowing he was obviously looking at your books.

“The amount of books you have.” He said, “And comics too.” “I do have quite the collection.” He smiled at you.

“You have Watchmen?” He looked at your complete collection on the top shelf. You nodded.

“Yeah, I do.” You said, “You seem surprised.” “No it’s just I um, I-” “You wouldn’t think a girl would read Watchmen?” “Well um,” He said, “I mean, yeah um- that makes me sound like a sexist asshole.” “No, it’s alright.” You assured him. “I don’t know that many girls who read it either.”

“It’s my favorite series. Alan Moore is just so good.” “It is a really good series,” You smiled. “I’ve always preferred V for Vendetta, by him at least. But I have a real soft spot for Black Widow comics.” He nodded. “She’s just a badass, ya know?” “She is.” He smiled.

“Awwww, look at you two.” You heard Frank. Both of you looked back to see everyone in the room smirking and looking at you guys. “If that isn’t love then I don’t know what is.” “Oh, shut up Iero.” You snapped. You wouldn’t consider yourself in love with Gerard considering you two hadn’t spent more than five minutes together, but you had to admit he was pretty attractive. “What time is it?” You asked out loud. Ray looked at his watch.

“5:56.” He replied.

“So dinner starts in four minutes.” Mel said, “We should probably go.” The six of you headed out of your cabin and down a few trails to the cafeteria.

“What’s usually for dinner?” Gerard asked you, walking beside you.

“First night’s usually pizza. It’s halfway decent. The rest of the food is shit but we live.” He nodded.

“But Y/N’s rich parents always ship us snacks.” Frank interrupted. You tensed feeling extremely uncomfortable at the topic that was brought up. Your parents were wealthy and you were extremely lucky and grateful, but you hated being associated with your family’s wealth and everyone in the group knew that.

“C’mon Frank.” Mel stuck up for you, “Just be grateful.”

You all made your way to the crowded hall, which was filled with primarily people who you had seen before, with a few new faces here and there. You all stood in line, grabbing the paper plates you had and grabbing your choice between Coke and water, you went with water. One by one you got two slivers of pizza on your plate, and sat at your traditional table in the corner. “So, let’s go over the groups.” Mel told Gerard. “This is probably the best time to do so.” “Most people here are nice. As long as you’re nice to them they’ll be nice back. The only people you don’t want to be near are the one’s in the center table.” She pointed, “They don’t have a group name because those are stupid, but-” “They’re a group of bitches.” Frank interrupted and Mel shot him a look, “Tell me I’m wrong.” She rolled her eyes.

“They’re just privileged white kids who are absolute pricks.” She sighed, “Just try to stay away from them. If you stay near us there’s a good chance we can help you if they decide to pick on you.”

“But they probably won’t,” Mikey began, “Because last year Y/N exposed their ring leader, Lacey, of getting a boob job in front of the entire camp.” Everyone snickered as I smirked.

“That was worth getting a three day detention.”

“Hell yeah it was.” Frank added on.

“Hello everyone!” You heard Jasper, the camp director shouted. You all sighed.

“Who’s that?” Gerard whispered.

“The director, Jasper. He’s gonna do his stupid yearly speech.” He nodded. You all sat back ready to endure his ongoing words about how great camp was, and all the fun, and responsibilities. Basically the bullshit.

“Basic rules,” He finished up, “No fighting. No drugs or alcohol,” Jasper looked at Frank, “That includes any tobacco products. And no bullying.” He finished up. “Now have fun!” Everyone clapped. The six of you got up, throwing out your plates and heading back to your cabins.

“The spot?” Mikey asked and you all nodded. You and Mel went in, Mel grabbing her backpack.

“Rose all day baby.” She smiled, slipping a few bottles and cups in. You rolled your eyes, “Oh c’mon, ease up a bit.” “I’m just not big on alcohol.” You said. You two got up and walked through the various patches of forest and trails, a flashlight in hand before you reached the spot, a little hangout area you found under an old bridge on the camp ground. You saw the four boys were already there.

“And here comes the ladies.” Frank sighed, lighting a cigarette, “Late as always.” You flipped him off. You took a seat on one of the wood benches next to Gerard, after climbing over a few rocks in the water to get to the area.

“Who wants a drink?” Mel asked. Everyone said yes, besides you and Gerard.

“Buzzkills.” Frank said.

“Hey.” You snapped, “Some people choose not to break rules. It’s a personal choice.” You looked at Gerard who nodded. Everyone began talking about some topic which you didn’t get invested in. You looked at Gerard who you could tell was not into it either. “Here,” You told him, grabbing his hand. He looked up at you. “Follow me.” He got up as you led him hand in hand to the other side of the bridge where you took your shoes off putting them in the water. Gerard followed. “It’s really beautiful here.” You said, looking up at the clear night sky.

“Yeah it is.” He agreed.

“So, why did you decide to come here?” You asked him.

“Well, Mikey would talk about it all the time. He just loves it here. I wanted to go for so long.” He explained, “But I was an alcoholic. So my parents eventually got me sober.” He finished.

“I don’t think your parents did.” You said, “You got yourself sober.” “Well, kinda.” He replied, “They just really pressured me to.” You nodded.

“Are you happier now?” You asked him, “Sorry if that was too much of a personal question.”

“No it’s alright.” He said, “Not too many people talk to me about it, they think it’s kinda weird. But yeah, I am happier now.” “That’s good, right?” He nodded.

“Yeah, it’s nice to be able to remember things.” He lightly laughed. “What about you?” He asked.

“What?” “What’s so fucked up about you?” He said, “And don’t lie and tell me nothing, because we’re all a little fucked up.”

“I don’t know.” You said, “I’m depressed. Which I guess in the grand scheme of things it isn’t the worst thing ever. Everyone in the group knows it, but I’ve been doing pretty alright for a while. Art’s helped me a lot.” “That’s good.” He said, “I’ve suffered with depression, art’s helped me too.”

“So what are you most excited for here?” You changed the subject. “I guess just meeting new people, like you.” He smiled, “So far that’s worked.” You nodded. “What’s something you always look forward to?”

“Basically hanging out.” You smiled, “We do this most nights, and when it rains we all go into Mel’s and my cabin and share stupid scary stories.” “Sounds fun.” “It is.” You said, “You’re obligated to come though, so you should see.” “I’m obligated?” He teased, “And how am I obligated.” “Well you’re apart of the group now,” You began, “And where else do you think you would fit in here?” “Ouch, that kinda hurt.” You both lightly laughed. “But you make a fair point.” “Oh I know I do.” You playfully nudged him.

“C’mon you two, we need to head back before it gets too dark.” Ray turned a corner of one of the pillars. You both got up walking over to where everyone else was.

The crew and you two walked back, you and Gerard trailing behind a bit to start up some small conversation. “What’s your first class tomorrow?” You asked.

“Sketching, I think. 10 am.” “Same.” You smiled. “What’s after that?” “I think I have writing and then cartooning.” “Oh cool,” You said, “I have photography and then painting.”

“That’s cool.” He replied. You two had made your way back to main camp, you and Melanie said bye to everyone and went back to your room.

“So, you and Gerard seem pretty cozy.” Mel smiled, as you crashed on your bed. You rolled your eyes.

“Oh fuck off.” “So you like him?” She smirked.

“I’m fond of him.” You corrected, “But he is attractive.”

“So are you gonna go after him?” “Probably not,” You sighed, “I mean he’s what, going into his senior year? He’s a year older and I’m sure he has a girlfriend.” “Have you asked him?” “No.” You replied honestly.

“Then ask him.” “That would make it so obvious.” “Then ask Mikey.” “Maybe.” You said, “But then Mikey would know.” “I think all of us already know.”

“Plus he’s way out of my league.” “Did you forget that you got hot?” She asked you, “Like really hot?” You huffed.

“I just don’t see it working.” “You haven’t even known him for 24 hours, and now you don’t think a relationship with him would work?” She asked, “You have six weeks to make something work with him and start a summer romance. Might as well do it early on.” “Shut up.” You sighed, “I’m going to bed.”

[saeyoungs-sunflower]

Matchup for @nad-zeta! (Milestone Celebration)

Zeta, my sweet sweet Zeta, here’s your matchup! You have been such an angel, both in your patience and your general loveliness.💛 I’m sorry it took a little longer than expected, but I hope it was worth the wait! It’s pretty long (~3000 words lolllll) so it’s all under the cut. Sorry, I got carried away! :’) xx

So, without further ado, based on the information you gave me I matched you with...

Saeyoung!

take care of my bby pls

I feel like I need to say that I kept going back and forth between him and Zen. Zen was a VERY close second, so I kinda half match you up with him too. That being said, there were some things you mentioned that made me lean more towards Saeyoung, which will be explained below :))

~

Reasoning & General Headcanons!

“🥰 i am a aries, infp, ravenclaw female 🦊”

An Aries you say...?

Need I say more? Absolute chaotic duo. The energy is buzzing, and the people you hang out are always amused by your shenanigans.

As an INFP, you are caring, loyal, and sensitive, which are traits that I believe Saeyoung would benefit from in a partner. He also hides his true emotions well, so someone with your personality type would be able to pick up on the signs that he is feeling low, even if he tries to hide it. Your loyalty and devotion also helps him feel secure, which considering everything he’s been through, is something I feel he would struggle with, particularly in the early stages of a relationship.

On the flip side, Saeyoung is also incredibly loyal. And whilst he does joke around and tease, he knows how sensitive topics and comments can affect someone, so he is never careless, especially since (as an INFP) you often take things to heart. As a team, you work well together because you view the world slightly differently. You’re an idealist, whereas he’s a realist; you focus on the big picture, whereas he has an incredible attention to detail. This is really helpful in difficult conversations, big decisions, plans for the future etc, because whilst your opinions may differ, you offer the other a different side of the story. You get the best of both worlds!

I don’t know my Harry Potter houses very well, but from my memory and a quick Google search, Ravenclaws value knowledge and are wise, intelligent and witty. Sounds familiar? ;) i mean wise is debatable lol. Your conversations are sooo interesting and natural, because you’re both very intelligent in many ways.

“i am pretty shy and difficult to get to know (apparently it took me 2 months to start opening up to my friends, ooops), i tend to bottle up my emotions, my friends would likely describe me as incredibly stubborn, gentle, kind, over dramatic, goofy and fun loving. I am pretty aloof and blunt, like i will 9/10 times tell you to your face how if feel about you if you ask 🙈once u are part of my inner circle i am playful, teasing, i am an extremely sarcastic person that makes snarky remarks under my breath and my kind of humor is a bit of dark and self deprecating.”

Okay, this was one of the key things that made me match you with Saeyoung. A huge reason why I love Saeyoung so much is that there is a high level of comfort in a relationship with him. By that I mean that he is so open and fun that there is literally zero judgment. Judgment is such a foreign concept to him in this kind of situation. He makes you so comfortable that it’s so easy to be yourself around him, and it doesn’t take long for him to get to know you.

GIRL HE’S THE SAME. The king of bottling up his emotions. This means that y’all know when something is up, you can see the signs. You are understanding of each other, so discussions happen and actions are put into place before things become too much.

Saeyoung sometimes just needs to be told when he’s being a lil prick. You are kind and gentle when he needs it, but also can be blunt with him when it gets silly. I mean, if MC was like you towards the end of his route, we would have got through the whole “i’M tOo dAnGeRoUs gEt aWaY” thing SO much more quickly.

Once you’re comfy with him, you become an absolutely unstoppable force. When he teases you, you tease him back. When he’s being playful, you’re his partner in crime. Y’all are so goofy. Your life is full of laughs and joy with Saeyoung.

Sarcastic comments, dark humour and self-deprecating jokes? Yep that’s also very Saeyoung. Sometimes you two have to reel it in a bit when you’re hanging out with others because YOU’RE OUT OF CONTROL TOGETHER.

“I love my friends and family and will fight anyone who threatens them, although when it comes to me, you can do or say anything to me and i wont do anything (I honestly can't stand up for myself).”

IT’S LIKE HE’S LOOKING IN A MIRROR. Seriously though, he knows the importance of self worth because he knows, firsthand, the damage that can be done when you don’t value yourself and your wellbeing. He makes it his mission to help you see how worthy you are of respect and give you confidence to stand up for yourself. Even if you won’t do it for yourself, he’ll stand up for you. He cares too much about his loved ones to let them be treated wrongly.

He feels how much you love him and your other friends/family which makes him feel so secure, and he also has a phenomenal amount of love in his heart to give and he ain’t afraid to do so.

“I swear like a sailor although I am trying to get that under control, however the road rage is real.”

Finds your road rage and swearing SO amusing. Constantly teasing you about it and winding you up, but it’s all in good fun.

Absolutely has a swear jar for you. No doubt about it.

“You’ve corrupted my good, Catholic ears.” “Saeyoung shut the fuck up.”

“I love nature and animals (i love my lil bunnies and dogs), i love working out/going to the gym #gym is life”

I mean, we know he adores cats, and I imagine he loves other animals too.

I also imagine he loves camping, and I don’t even know why. He just gives me camping vibes. Weekends away spent in nature, sleeping in a tent and sitting round a fire in the evenings are pretty common for you.

I know this is ~controversial~ topic in the fandom, but I am of the opinion that Saeyoung also works out.

Do I think he’s completely ripped? No, probably not. But he’s strong, lean at the very least. Even Jaehee admits it! He makes working out so much fun and it’s always a bit of a laugh.

“i enjoy cooking (i am now officially a chef), wine tasting (fancy way of saying getting very tipsy of different wines most nights), spending time with friends (especially if there is tea to be spilt) although i do need lots of alone time to recharge my social battery”

The first time he tasted your food, he almost cried. Poor boi lived off eating crisps and soda for God knows how long.

“Wait, you’re not meant to constantly feel like you're gonna throw up? Food is meant to have...flavour???”

Help him

Saeyoung is pretty social, but also needs time to recharge like you, though he can go a bit longer than you and doesn’t easily get drained by social interactions. This may seem like a problem when you spend time with friends, but it’s actually such a blessing. If you’re feeling exhausted when socialising, he knows and will “take the wheel” if you will. There’s nothing worse than trying to keep a conversation going or seeming upbeat when you literally don’t have the energy, so Saeyoung is there to help you out. He’s also super good at politely and subtly taking you out of those situations if you are super drained and need to recharge.

He’s also such a gossip so if you got tea to spill he’s ready to hear it, and you know he ALWAYS has tea to spill. Sneaky man

“i like conspiracies, reading, writing (Fanfics and im busy with my Masters in nutrition >“<), rom coms, and  sleeping. As much as i love spending time outdoor i also enjoy lazing around the house being a lazy potato.”

Discussions about conspiracies over dinner lol. He is in possession of some...top secret information, so those conversations are very interesting and eye opening ;)

He LOVES to read your writing. It literally doesn’t matter what it’s about, he finds it truly fascinating. It’s a little glimpse into who you are, and it’s something you created!!! By yourself!!!! HE LOVES THAT. Always impressed with what you write, every time. He’s so proud.

ROM COMS WHILST CUDDLING ON THE COUCH

He’s a cryer, he loves rom coms.

He works super hard, so he’s always down to have a lazy day with you!!

“I definitely zone out and daydream all the freaken time and tend to blush easily which i hate 🙈 i definitely dont like crowds and loud sounds (ie you will never find me in a club). I am a picky eater despite my degree in cooking (i basically only eat candy, carbs and protein)”

He. loves. Making. You. blush. I’m sorry, but it’s one of his favourite things. He thinks it’s so adorable, so prepare for all the teasing, lewd jokes and general flirtiness that’ll get your cheeks burning ;)

He’s not keen on crowds either, so that’s not a problem!! I imagine he occasionally goes on night’s out with the bois (and by bois I mean usually just Zen and Yoosung LOL) but he’s not often out until super late, and he’s super respectful of you. Would never ask you to do something or go somewhere that makes you uncomfortable.

“i love cuddles although i look like someone that wouldn’t. Ive been told i come across as calm and confident, while in truth on the inside i am really scared and insecure.   I am incredibly awkward when it comes to boys and have been told my sarcastic comments are x100 when i talk to them (oops).”

CUDDLE MONSTER. I actually think he’s the biggest cuddler in the RFA. Controversial I know, but damn Saeyoung loves a cuddle. He’s a spontaneous cuddler. Like it doesn’t matter what the situation is, if you need a cuddle or he just fancies one, he’ll find a way.

He sees right through your calmness and confidence, because he’s exactly the same. This puts him in the perfect position to reassure you and lift you up. He’s a great hype man!

He finds your awkwardness adorable, and your sarcastic comments just make him love you even more! He has a good sense of humour and doesn’t take things too seriously if they don’t need to be, so he’s constantly laughing with you and easing your mind in the very early stages of your relationship.

“I am very go with the flow, and i never burn my bridges 🙈 i am very forgive and forget🦊, like no matter how badly you hurt me.”

Based on what happens on his route, it’s very handy that you are a forgiving person hahah

But again, if Saeyoung thinks you are being treated wrongly and being hurt, he will stand up for you.

His dedication to protecting the ones he loves is STRONG. I mean, look at his relationship with Saeran and the way he is constantly looking out for you in ALL routes.

Of course, he won’t say or do anything to that person if that makes you uncomfortable. Instead, he will constantly reassure you of your self-worth and remind you that you deserve better, but will also support the decisions you make.

If you want to forgive and forget, he will respect that, even if he thinks differently.

“What am i looking for in a potential partner?.... well i definitely think i need someone that could bring me out my shell initially, also someone who isn't too sensitive cause like i said i can be super sarcastic and my jokes kinda match that (like in my family we show out affection for each other via playful insults and savage comments)😂😂”

As I stated above, I think Saeyoung is the best person to help bring you out of your shell. There’s no judgment and no shame with this man.

I find that someone being unapologetically themself is SO contagious, and Saeyoung is exactly that - unapologetically himself.

We’ve all seen his humour, he doesn’t seem to be particularly sensitive either so you’re all good there hahaha. Obviously everyone does have their limits, so whilst their are topics/jokes that would probably make him uncomfortable (e.g. stuff relating to Saeran), overall, he’s chill and ALWAYS ready to joke around with you.

The roast battle is so real with you two LOL

“i kinda want someone stable, hard working, decisive, ambitious and who can push me out of my confort zone and vice versa.🦋”

He goofs around, but there’s no denying that this man works HARD.

Once he leaves the agency and starts his new life with you, I can imagine him being super ambitious and also aiming for stability.

His life before had been so restrictive yet so uncertain. He had to do what he was told, but never knew what was just around the corner.

This makes me think that he would crave the stability and certainty that he never had (a ‘normal’ life, if you will), but also he’d want to try so many things that he hadn’t before. He strikes me as a ‘go big or go home’ kinda guy, so I think it’s safe to say that he would be ambitious in many ways.

The only thing I don’t think he ticks the box on is decisiveness, at least not at the beginning. I think he usually knows what he wants, but rarely acts on that.

“It’s up to you”, “whatever you want” and “I don’t mind” are very common phrases for him lol. I think he would learn to be more decisive once he gets comfortable. I also think he has his moments of assertiveness though, when he’s in the right mood.

“Also someone who is family oriented and loving (someone that can cuddle me when im having a bad day)☺ and someone who can make me laugh, cause i love joking around so i kinda think i need someone who could match that🌻”

SAEYOUNG. IS. SUCH. A. FAMILY. MAN.

Again, look at what he’s done for Saeran and how deeply he cares for and loves him. A ‘normal’ family was something that was absent in his life, so when he has his own family (whether that be a found family or one he made) he would cherish that so strongly, maybe more than most.

SAEYOUNG. IS. A. CUDDLE. MONSTER.

He could be working at his desk and suddenly think “you know what? It’s snuggle time” and then he would search the house for you to give you The Snuggle™

Again, he’s also VERY observant and his attention to detail is impeccable, so he can instantly tell if you’re having a bad day and will act accordingly - aka SNUGGLE TIME

I mean, need I say more? If you want someone who makes you laugh, Saeyoung is the guy. There is never a dull day when he’s around, and the house is always filled with laughter!

So yeah....that’s my reasoning :’)) now onto your very own drabble!! This is all yours, so if there’s anything you’d like me to change or add, PLEASE let me know!! I’m more than happy to edit anything to make it more personalised for you, just shoot me a message and I’ll be on it, same goes for anything I’ve said above!!🥰

~

Drabble!

“Saeyoung! Can you come here a second?”

You called out to him from the kitchen, stirring from a pot whilst its contents quietly bubbled away. You could hear the music blaring from his headphones all the way from the other room, with the occasional hum or drum on his desk. Evidently, he hadn’t heard you.

“SAEYOUNG CHOI GET YOUR FINE ASS IN HERE.”

The music ceased, followed by rapid pattering as he darted into the room, nearly skidding round the doorway. 

“I heard ‘fine ass’ and here I am,” he smirked, sauntering over to you and snaking his strong, secure arms around your middle. He swayed you from side to side, planting a wet kiss on your cheek, much to your dismay. Saeyoung merely chuckled, resting his chin on your shoulder, “What do you need, witch lady?”

“Why ‘witch lady’?”

“Well, whatever you’re cooking is giving me witchy vibes. It looks like a potion in a cauldron. Look at you with your double double toil and trouble-OW! Don’t pinch me!”

“Sorry, it’s a witch thing,” you winked, spinning around in his grip so you were face-to-face. “You sure you’re not the witch? You do have the nose for it.”

“I’ve also got the dress and hat in the attic, shall I go put it on?”

“Try this for me first.” You held the wooden spoon out to him as he took a sip, chuckling at the way his brows furrowed in thought.

He smacked his lips a few times, hummed then finally looked back to you, “It’s good.”

“That’s it? That’s all you got?”

“You do realise that my taste buds have essentially been burned off by chips and soda, right? I have no idea if something’s bad or not.”

“You’re right. I should call Jumin.”

“You can’t,” he informed, his smirk growing ever wider as he moved towards the snack cupboard, “Mr Han has a date tonight.”

The spoon clattered against the counter, your mouth agape, “You’re shitting me.”

“That’s another coin in the swear jar.” Saeyoung chucked a packet of candy in your direction, though it only hit you in the face before falling unceremoniously onto the kitchen floor, “I think we need to get your reflexes checked, babe.”

“Tell me everything.”

He took a seat on a breakfast stool and chortled as you leaned over the counter, eyes showing your eagerness to hear the gossip. And he was more than happy to provide, “He appears to be really into her. Like, really into her. She seems to just get him, you know? I could hear his smile down the phone when he told me about her earlier.”

“Earlier? Why are you only just telling me this now?!”

“Do you wanna hear the rest of it or not?”

Huffing, you perched on the seat next to him, stealing a piece of his candy despite his look of horror, “Okay, well where did he meet such a woman?”

“You’re never gonna believe it.”

“Try me.”

Saeyoung was enjoying himself far too much. He couldn’t wait another moment to witness your reaction, “She’s Zen’s co-star.”

“NO.”

“YES.”

The tea had been spilt, and things were about to get very interesting within the RFA.

Your eyes were glued to his as he continued to disclose the details. At some point you had wrapped your arm around his, his other hand encompassing yours. He abruptly stopped halfway through describing the first encounter, causing you to quirk an eyebrow impatiently, “What?”

“Do you smell burning?”

“...Fuck.”

“And another one for the swear jar.”

~

@nad-zeta​ there we go my love, I hope you enjoyed your matchup!! I am so grateful for your support, it never fails to make me smile when I see you pop up in my notifs. You are beautiful, kind, bright person and you deserve the world. Thank you again for all you’ve done and all you do💛💛 Take care of yourself, my friend! xxx

(Note for other readers: I usually don’t do matchups, this was for a special occasion! I doubt I’ll open up requests for them later on, but never say never!)

[etraytin]

Quarantine, Day 242

November 8 Back home, thank god, and recovering from camping. Camping is definitely not my favorite activity but the kiddo loves it and had been super disappointed to realize that the three-day Cub Scout camping trip from last year was almost surely not going to happen even before his pack disbanded. So of course I had to jump on this spur-of-the-moment one night local camping gig, even though it is literally November. I was also a little worried that he might not get along with members of the new pack, and figured that there are much worse ways to tell how kids are going to get along than by throwing them together for twenty hours of outdoor activities time.  We ended up having a good time, for the most part, and the kids ended up getting along pretty well. One kid in the pack is definitely a bit of a pissant who needs to learn manners, but the kiddo managed to bond with that kid's main deputy over a shared deep interest in Among Us and extremely dumb jokes, so things weren't too bad. I think there is going to be some continuing friction there, but not so much that it should ruin things with so many other boys around to hang out with. Definitely the worst part of the trip for me personally was not any interpersonal stuff but the realization that the three mile hike was not, as last year's had been, a pack activity with parents staying home and doing stuff around the camp, but a full-group activity. I am capable of walking three and a half miles (the final actual distance) if I need to, but it is not a leisure activity for me. It is also not what I want to do immediately before having to pitch a ten-person tent and then sleep outdoors, but we make sacrifices for our children and also to not be the only one not doing the supportive thing that all the other moms and dads are doing. Uuuuugh. Also the only thing worse than a three and a half mile walk is a three and a half mile walk while wearing a face mask most of the time.  After the walk and setting up our tent, which the kiddo and I were able to do on our own in about ten minutes, not too bad, everyone started getting ready for dinner. Mask discipline during this portion of the campout became very shoddy, but at least we were outdoors in the breeze and everyone was sanitizing their hands. Dinner was foil-wrapped pita pizza pockets that were good but required time to prep and cook, so I broke out the emergency pack of hot dogs and long forks and the kids went to town on that while they were waiting. Cub Scouts are pretty much always ravenous. We did pita pockets, and then transitioned almost immediately into smores cones and cups, also wrapped in foil and cooked on the grill or in the coals. They were good, but so much messier in the end than just making smores! I gave in to temptation and flambeed a couple of marshmallows on a stick because that is how I like them best. The kids told ghost stories (sort of) and improvised a live-action version of Among Us that was basically tag in the dark with a lot of screaming. Hopefully nobody was camping out this weekend with the expectation of a lot of peace and quiet. We did get them to simmer down by eight-thirty or so, because we are responsible adults who never, ever get tired of shushing children.  The kiddo and I were both pretty beat by the end of the night, and it was getting cold. I had a big Intex air mattress we'd already blown up in the tent, and although we'd forgotten pillows, I was still hoping for a comfy night. Unfortunately we'd only been in bed maybe twenty minutes when the kiddo noticed an air leak in the bed. We patched it with medical tape (the only tape we had), reinflated the bed and hoped for the best. It did okay for awhile, but it turns out that laying on an air mattress outside is a good way to get all the heat sucked out of your body. We shivered and tried to sleep for awhile longer, then wound up laying my sleeping bag down on the mattress and both of us huddled under his sleeping bag. Eventually we were warm enough to sleep (it was about 50 outside at this point, not like super cold, but certainly very uncomfortable) except that the mattress continued slowly leaking through the night until eventually the kiddo rolled all the way across the mattress and knocked me off the side of the bed. By this time it was nearly six in the morning, so we gave up on the bed and went to go relax and get warm in the car. It was an excellent choice. The one nice thing we did get to do that night was watch President- Elect Biden's speech on my phone, since we hadn't been able to watch it live.  That was one funny thing I noticed, nobody on the entire trip said a single thing about the election except for like one joke in the morning about Alaska's speed at counting ballots. I guess it's not too surprising considering that I suspect most of the other parents are pretty conservative and probably not feeling super great, but it did seem a little strange that they weren't even commiserating. I remember in 2016 I was basically crying on my friends' shoulders from the get-go. Maybe people just don't know how to feel yet. In any case, the silence was much preferable to having to get into a political argument and I wasn't going to start gloating or anything, so I just followed the news on my phone all evening and participated in the not-saying-anything.  In the morning, once we'd made the trek to the thankfully-heated bathrooms and warmed up our cold bodies in the car, we had breakfast with the group. This was egg-hashbrowns-cheese mix in foil packets, making sort of omlette-y things that turned out pretty tasty! We also did crescent rolls wrapped around the long forks, kind of doughy and burnt but entertaining. There was also coffee, courtesy of my propane stove and kettle, which made it slightly easier to cope with the new day. After breakfast was a slow and easy sort of camp-breaking, mostly done by the adults while the boys played. It was really nice to give the kiddo a chance to just run around outside with some other kids, especially since we'll be quarantining for the next couple of weeks. I guess if we were ever going to get exposed, now is the time for it when we've already cleared our schedule? In any case, eventually we struck the tents and cleaned everything up and headed home a little before eleven. We got home, I put away our leftover cold stuff in the fridge, and then retreated to the bedroom for a two hour nap. The kiddo didn't nap, but he fell asleep before suppertime in our bed and stayed there until we managed to coax him to his own bed at 11pm, so hopefully he'll be recovered by tomorrow as well. It was a busy weekend, and I feel better than I have in a long time. 

[thewayiremember]

EPISODE 2

July 6, 09:47 AM

The official police statement is that I was found brutally beaten in a narrow alley near the movie theater I was supposed to be at around that time.

 THE THINGS I KNOW:

The movie was to start at 7 PM

Complete blackout

I was found at 11:40 by a woman, who when calling 911 reported she had found a dead body because according to her I wasn’t breathing and my body parts were not really where they should be, but thank God the paramedics who rushed to the place didn’t entirely believe her judgments. It turned out that she didn’t even get close to me because she was too scared, and from a distance, I looked much worse than I did in reality.

The police later found out by looking into the security cameras that I wasn’t present at the movie theater that night

The police are annoyed because they don't believe in my memory loss and think I just don’t want to tell them where I went that evening.

My parents don’t believe me either. They asked me about a thousand times now why did I lie to them about going to the movies. Well, we don’t know if I lied to you, do we? To confirm that, I would have to KNOW that, and I DON’T KNOW that. Thanks for being supportive and not making me feel guilty.

  It’s ridiculous to talk about. It’s ridiculous to even write about. But it is true, I did travel back in time. I keep having flashbacks of a teenage girl yelling at me that if I don’t do anything it will be my fault and that I need to go back to the day that it happened. But WHAT happened? I think her name was Nora? It all feels like a memory long forgotten.

I’ve been avoiding thinking about it because every time I do my stomach drops. I don’t want to get involved, I don’t care. Why should I? It’s not my fault I don’t remember. I want to be a dentist, not a detective. And I’m not a kid anymore who’s excited to run around the city solving mysteries. I don’t care about what happened to me. I'm fine! Stuff happens, let me move on.

11:30 AM  

I asked a nurse if she could give me some more painkillers today because I couldn’t bare staying in bed for another day. She said “No problem”, but I’m pretty sure she gave me some sugar-filled pills since I don’t feel any better. Nice try, lady!

Apparently,I'm the only one who didn’t know this place had a cafeteria downstairs because when I went there people were having a legit breakfast party. It was too loud,so I ordered a coffee to go and took off immediately. Where do all those people get their energy from so early in the morning? Oh, coffee, probably. Nevermind. I went to the mini-park instead. Nice benches, nice grass, nice… fence? Yeah, I don’t have anything to say about this park. It’s nice cause it’s at the back of the hospital, so you can’t really hear any cars driving by. Yeah, that’s what I call a smart design, that’s it, right there.

I haven’t heard from Bobbie and Nicole for seven days now. They went camping on some kind of meditation program that Bobbie was really excited to go to and he tried everything to make us go with him. I don’t know how he managed to bribe Nicole into this, but there just wasn’t a chance that I’d spent a whole week without my phone or Internet whatsoever. So maybe that’s just karma that got me beaten for turning my back on a friend. Nah, I’d probably ruin the experience for Bobbie with my moodiness anyway. I like to think that I’m letting them gather their energy back that they lose by putting up with me. It’s a good thing. I’m a good friend.

They should be back by 7 PM. Today. They don’t know what’s happened. I mean, me neither, but I need to give them some kind of explanation. Do I prepare them first, somehow? Do I text them what happened, or do I wait till I’m back home tomorrow and we see each other in person? Do they want me to wait, or are they going to be angry that I didn’t want them to visit me here? Because I think I don’t. It’s depressing in here. People get triggered by hospitals. They get all miserable, it gets awkward, they don’t know what to say because they feel the need to feel sorry for everybody. And I don’t want to be felt sorry for. I’m fine.

Telling them thatI had a car crash crosses my mind for a second. That way I would skip the uncomfortable part of losing my memory and they could tell me all about their boring trip, that I’m actually weirdly keen on hearing. I kind of miss interacting with people. I know I always say that I love being alone, and I still stand by it. I recharge by being alone. But let me tell you, this place has recharged me pretty quickly. Or has it completely drained me and it’s not the lack of interaction itself that I miss, but just the lack of interaction with healthy people?  Yeah, I can’t tell.

3:10 PM

Nathaniel, buddy, my hospital bestie, did they treat you good today? Are you comfy, do you need me to adjust your pillow? Here, let me… Better? Yeah, it is. Sorry I haven’t been around that much this morning, but do you remember when I told you that I wanted to explore this hospital some more before I leave? Yeah, and I’m leaving tomorrow morning, so, today had to be the day. Did you know there’s a mini-park at the back? And somewhere above us, there’s also have a mini-church. And when I say church I mean a room with a hanging crucifix on the wall. I’ haven't found any mini-synagogues or mini-mosques, though. Are you religious? Probably not. But how do you feel about Christmas?

Oh yeah, I talk to him like that. I just googled how likely is it for an unconscious person to hear me, and it said there’s a 25% chance. I’m doomed. I must look like Kathy Bates in “Misery” to him now that I think about it. When you wake up and you want to fill a lawsuit against me… I’ll be waiting.

I was out of bed for 4,5 hours and I’m completely exhausted. Is that how elderly people feel all the time? I hope not. I was planning on being an active senior. That’s how I see myself in 50 years. Hiking, biking, maybe even running. I’d be the coolest grandpa.

8:30 PM

I just took a 3 hour nap. Great, good luck falling asleep tonight. I’m looking around the room to see if I have to start packing today, but I guess I don’t have that many things here with me anyway, so, I’ll leave it for tomorrow. My mom is picking me up at 11 AM so I’ll have plenty of time to do it. If my last morning blood test results are all good that is, but I’m sure they will be.

I just got a text from Bobbie. Here’s the screenshot:

BOBBIE: Guess who’s back! Come over and don’t forget to bring your PJs. I promise I won’t be boring you with any meditation stories. Nicole said she won’t be attending my Sleepover Night because apparently, she’s tired of sleeping with me.

ME (wanting to sound neutral): Sounds great, but I can’t. See you tomorrow?

BOBBIE: What’s wrong?

God, he’s annoying. Of course he knows there’s something wrong.

ME (trying to keep it real but not reveal where I am so that he doesn’t get a wrong impression and think that I’m dying): Nothing serious, stop worrying. I’m free after 12, you down?

BOBBIE (thinking I need a lecture from him): Every time you have a problem you stop talking to me? Have you noticed? You avoid me until you solve it alone and you’re able to just tell me all about it afterward. Include me in the story sometimes.

But yes, I’m down, after 12 it is.

Yes, I have noticed. And I wouldn’t include him this time either, but since the story of why I woke up in the hospital isn’t over yet, I kind of have to include him, don’t I? I don’t want them to make a big deal out of it and I know they will. It’s not THAT serious. I’m fine!

[annakie]

A Post about Patchy

Hey would you like to read a lot of words about and see some pics of this cat?  Because I’m going to do that below this cut.

Don’t worry, longtime followers, this is a happy post.

Those of you who have been following me since 2014 or before may remember Patchy.  I don’t talk about her much on the blog, but I think it’s time. 

If you were worried this may be a post-mortem post, don’t be.  She’s happy and healthy.

The pic above was taken in October 2010.  It’s the earliest picture I have of Patchy.  By this point I had already known her for about a year.

Back in like 2009, around the time I got Cebu, when I started actually looking out in my backyard, I realized that there were several cats who hung out back there at night.  I just have a chain link fence in my yard so it’s not surprising they could easily jump it from the alley or side yards, and I have a pretty large patio with some comfy patio chairs, so I guess it seemed like a good spot for them to hang, since I wasn’t out there much. 

I wouldn’t know that TNR was a thing for awhile, and since I have a soft spot for cats, I’d leave them out some kibble, I’d just buy a bag of the cheapest stuff at the grocery store and throw a cup out a night to keep them from starving to death back then.  There were often 5 or so cats back there, and if I’d have known then what I know now, I would have started TNR way earlier. 

The cats would come and go, and there were so many that I just called them by identifying characteristics.  “Brown-nosed tabby” and “Tuxedo” and “Orangie” or whatever.  So this Calico just became “Patchy” since she has patches of color.  For awhile, she was just one of that gang.

Cats would disappear, new ones would show up.  Patchy and Moustachio, a shorthaired B&W cat with a mustache, were around the longest.  I’m not sure what happened to most of the other cats, I’m sure they got hit by cars and picked up by the pound and other unpleasantness.  I had to dispose of a few myself.

Patchy, somehow, kept surviving.  Although there were a few times when she’d disappear for weeks at a time and I guessed that was the end of her, but she’d show up later all skin and bones, and then I’d switch her to my cats’ expensive, grain-free food and even give her wet food to get her back on her feet.  Once she even showed up bloody with a very scary gash on her head.  Not being able to touch her to put like, neosporin or something on that was killing me and I did what I could to help her recover, which was mostly just making sure she had plenty of good food and water.  She made it.

And in these first few years, several times, kitten litters showed up in my backyard.

Cebu... get out of the way.  (He was always real good about knowing exactly where to be for being in the way.  I miss him so much.)  (Pics taken in May, 2013.)

Ah, yeah, there’s Patchy with two litters of kittens, one of which was hers and the others were her own grandchildren.  I rescued two out of those eleven and still kick myself for not doing more.

After having to clean up a few of her messes and over a few years saving over a half dozen of her kittens, and not saving many more, I decided it was time to do something about this.  I started by getting her to trust going into my house.

My master bedroom has a sliding glass door to the patio.  (The door you see there goes into the garage, sliding glass door is to the right.)  So I started trailing food into the house and into the master bathroom to get her to explore there, and under the bed so she saw a safe place to hide.  I’d then hanging out in the bedroom reading and letting her come in to explore the inside.  I got her to understand there was food and clean water, and shelter there.  

I thought I wasn’t far enough along with trusting me when she was pregnant once again in spring, 2014.  But one night she did run right inside the house when I opened the sliding glass door to let Cebu out, climbed into the lining that had been ripped out a bit under my bed, and set up camp.  For the next few months, she lived there.  I contacted a feral rescue group in my area who agreed to let me foster the kitties and they’d get them adopted, then loan me a trap to get Patchy TNR’d.  So that was a relief.

Also?  Patchy picked the spot where she wanted to “go”, and after I cleaned up that first mess I put a litter box there and she took right to it, have NEVER had a litter issue since.

The long, and complete story about the next few months can be found on my Rescue Kitties tag, with many many pictures and updates.  But I’ll still post a few, and a summary.

She never came out from beneath the bed if I was in the room, but I would go hang out with her when I got home from work every day, lay on the floor and sing to her and talk to her, give her yummy wet food, and sometimes, if she felt frisky, she’d play laser pointer with me when I would lay in bed before sleeping at night, always on the floor, never daring to get on the bed.  That’s fine.

In April 2014 one morning I awoke to kitten noises.

She was such a good momma to those kittens.  After the first day & night in the birthing box I set up for her, and she did even let me change out the towel (but got real mad when I tried to move the food bowl slightly away), she brought the babies back under the bed and I’d have to peek and use my camera to even see them.

Eventually, they got old enough to get curious, they came out to play, and she let me play with them and socialize them. 

And after a few more weeks, the babies went to the rescue group, and found their forever homes. 

It took TWO MORE WEEKS of making Patchy very unhappily live inside before I could get her into a trap, so she could be TNR’d.  Although she was OK with me touching the babies, touching was strictly off-limits for HER.

But hey!  We did it!  She went and got TNR’d, got a clean bill of health... and went back outside.

I didn’t see her for like two weeks, and when she came back she was skin and bones, and decided that maybe it was OK to be back here and let me give her food again, after all.

And then for the next year or so, well, if it were really hot or cold or storming outside, when I’d let Cebu out before bed, maybe she’d decide to spend the night under the bed, after all.  But she wanted to go back outside during the day.  That’s fine.  The other cats hated being locked out of the bedroom sometimes, but they got used to it.

Slowly, throughout 2014 and 2015 her inside stays got a little longer and a little longer.  It was too hot or too cold out for days at a time, then weeks at a time.

The worst part about this time is that she’d get fleas.  And then Cebu would get fleas, and then Jim, Leela, Fry and Pemily would have fleas.  And then I’d have to do an expensive round of flea meds on all 5 of the inside pets, and not being able to touch Patchy to give HER meds was a problem until I found some like, garlic pills online that I’d mash into her wet food and give to her.  Luckily, between that and flea-powdering (the vacuuming) the carpets, the fleas would be taken care of.  I think I went through this three times.  Eventually I just started giving her a flea pill once a month.  I didn’t love doing it because apparently some cats have bad reactions, but it was that or... stop letting her into the house because I couldn’t keep exposing the rest of the pets to fleas.  Luckily, it worked.

Of course when Cebu died at the end of 2016 I had a lot less reason to ever go to the backyard, so, she had a lot fewer chances to try and go outside, anyway.  But it’d been awhile before that since she’d go out.  I used to leave the door open enough for Cebu to go out and come back in during nice days, and she wouldn’t bother most of the time.  And usually, even when she did, she’d be back inside for bed.

She did get out for like two minutes once last year, but she made it to the end of the backyard, saw I was going back inside, and ran back to me and inside all on her own after that.

She’s at least ten years old now, I think she’s happy to be settled.

I feel bad that she lives her entire life in one room.  I’ve tried a few things to see if she wants to integrate.  Pemily is my most social and outgoing and friendly cat, and also she is literally Patchy’s granddaughter, and several times Pemily has managed to sneak her way into the bedroom, she’s very wiley.  Patchy DOES NOT LIKE IT.  Usually within 10 minutes there are growls, spits and hisses.  Once or twice Pemily has made it into the bedroom without me noticing, and I’ll find her sitting by the door VERY READY to leave when I go back in.  Patchy and Fry would never get along, and she’d probably bully Leela, so... she’s a bedroom cat.

We still play laser pointer, I made sure we has a few hunting-type toys, which are the only thing she responds to.  I’ve tried several “enrichment” toys that the other cats like, stimulation toys, hiding toys, a mini-cat tower that she only uses the brush on, special places to lay down... whatever.  I also bought her a life-sized stuff cat for companionship and NOPE, she hissed at it.  I left in in the room just in case she gets used to it and she ignores it. She doesn’t really care. She likes to hunt fake mice and the laser pointer, everything else is “Meh.”  

She used to dump her water out all the time and I realized she likes to drink moving water, so I put Cebu’s water fountain in there and she loves it.  She has the view of the backyard from the sliding glass doors she spends a lot of time looking out at.  She has crunchy food always and gets some wet food when I get home from work, I spend a few minutes with her when I come home from work every day and at least an hour hanging out in bed watching shows and playing laser pointer... and she seemed happy.

In January, 2016 I woke up one night and found a warm lump next to my feet.  

It may have been a little earlier than that, but not much.  Patchy figured out that it’s more comfy ON the bed (well, she had been sleeping up there when I wasn’t in the room before then, but never while I was there) and hey, humans are warm!  Actually now that I look at it, I think this pic was taken in the afternoon, so maybe this was one of the first times she came onto the bed when she knew I was awake.  (Hey, I’m big on weekend afternoon naps.)

Further strides.. were slow, but measured.  The first time she’d come up on the bed while I was sitting up.  The first time she walked on me when I was laying on my side.  The first time she walked on my stomach and smelled my face.  Figuring out that sleeping higher up on the legs is even warmer.  Figuring out that purring and making biscuits on the human’s leg was really nice.  Oh man, I cried the first time she made biscuits and I heard her purring.  That was probably early 2017.

I had a few aborted attempts at trying to touch / pet her, including thinking she was Pemily while I was still half alseep.  These always lead to setbacks that took awhile to get that trust back.

After awhile, she’d sometimes even do stuff like... this.

This was a huge deal because it was the first time I had even thought to record her and she just came right up and said hi, and she laid there for like 20 seconds while I talked to her.

And then I asked her if she wanted pets, and she immediately backed off.

But hey, she backed off to go do this...

So it wasn’t so terrible.  A little biscuit making before settling down to hang out.

I decided about a year ago, that to move forward, what I needed was to get her used to my hands. So I began Operations: Hands are OK!  For literally the last year, every day I just try to spend a few minutes with my hands somewhere near her when she settles in.  And I started trying TINY PETS on her paws when she was relaxed.  This was a gamble because most cats hate having their paws touched.  But she could see my fingers touching her paws, and tiny gentle paw strokes that did not hurt were something she could control, and remove her paws from.  Which usually she did, and at first she’d get up and move, but eventually, she’d just tuck her paws under.

Sometimes... even something like this would happen...

See?  You can touch MY hands, too!  It’s OK!

I also let her sniff my hand any time she was close enough, and she got used to that, I started using it as a greeting.  She was totes OK with touching any part of me that was covered up with a blanket at this point.  So I’d also put my hand under the blanket sometimes and then under her paws or side.  She didn’t like this much, either, but would tolerate it in small bursts. 

I was patient with her and tried to not push her boundaries too much.

The thing is, though, she has not been to the vet since getting TNR’d in 2014, and she’s now at least 10 years old.  I don’t want to take her if it’s going to set her back, and I don’t want to someday have her be sick and still terrified of my hands, of touch, so... I pushed forward.

The last few months... I started feeling like she knew she wanted something else, but she didn’t know what she wanted or how to ask for it.   So I went for pets with the back of my hand a few times, slowly, letting her know where my hand was at all times and she’d... run away after a short brush.

She’d hang out... close, like this, though.  Looking at me like... “I need something.  What is it that I need?”

Less than two weeks ago, on June 12, I had to wake up at 4am for a work thing, made it back to bed at 6:15ish, then woke up, oops, an hour later than I meant to around 9am.  I really needed to get up and get to work, but woke up to Patchy laying with me, then when she saw I was awake she climbed up to my stomach, purring.

“Okay, we’re gonna try pets again,” I said to her, and showed her the back of my hand.  She sniffed it, then I lightly brushed it against her side.  She didn’t move.

“Okay, we’re gonna do that again,” I said, and for 4 or 5 strokes, she let me.  So I got bold, and went for the regular front-hand full body pet down the spine.

She let me.  I held my breath and looked at her and she didn’t move.  I tried again and she let me.  And after a few seconds... I was just... petting her.  Like you would any other cat.  I literally got teary eyed as I told her what a good girl and brave girl she is.  She... leaned into it.

After about a minute, I got really bold and tried a neck scratch.

SHE.  LOVED.  IT.

This was after about five minutes of neck-scratch / body pets switching.  I grabbed my phone off the nightstand to capture the moment, and she was totally cool with staying still while I shifted a bit to take the pictures with my left hand.

I probably hung out with her for ten or fifteen minutes and actually had to push her away to get up and run into work and not miss a meeting I was supposed to run at 10.  I’ve been so. damn. happy. about this.

It took ten years you guys.  Or damn close to it.  A decade of knowing this cat, of getting her to trust me bit by bit.  

And now, when I hop in bed at night, whenever she’s ready she’ll jump up and hang out.  A few nights ago she even let me pet her while she was standing up and I was sitting up for a moment, and once while I was sitting up and sitting cross-legged, she laid down on the pillow in front of my legs and just let me pet her that way.  

She even woke me up in the middle of the night last night going “Uh, hey, that thing you do now?  Do that some.”  She lays there and purrs and lets me pet her for a long time.

She still mostly runs under the bed if I’m in the room and not on the bed, but the last year or so she’s been lazy about it, instead of jumping up terrified and running under the bed it’s more like “Oh... you’re here.  Ok.”  More like a routine than a necessity.  The last few days she may even be outside of the bed under the nightstand or just... NEAR the bed if I’m walking around, but I haven’t pushed that boundary yet.

My goal is now, by the end of the year, have her tolerate me picking her up, or at least pushing her around.  Get it so I can get her into a carrier and... if I’m real lucky, get her to the vet before 2019 is over.  We’ll see.

Maybe, but not likely, someday I can open the bedroom door again, sleep with the other cats (I do occasionally sleep in the guest room so they can hang out with me, but that bed is nooot as comfortable.)  For the last few years I was doubtful we’d ever get this far.  So who knows.

Thanks for reading this far!  I have been wanting to just record this story for awhile and made myself sit down and do it tonight.  I’ll post further updates if warranted. :)

[missblissy]

May I have number 50 from the cotton candy prompts with Arthur?? Thanks baby

Cotton Candy Fluff Writing Prompts [pt. 3/8]

Send me a number 1 thru 50 for a word that I’ll use to write a fluffy headcanon, drabble, or starter. Send 🔄  for a random number instead. WARNING: some prompts listed are NSFW. (SOURCE)

50. — getting away from it all

((Bet, gotchu babes, enjoy the story

It was far too fucking early in the god damn morning for this much ruckus to be waking you up from your peaceful sleep. The same went for Arthur. You rolled over, away from the loud banging and crashes of whatever the hell was going on outside your tent. You curled up beside Arthur, burying your face into his bare chest while he instinctively wrapped an arm around you.

The sun was barely leaking inside the tent. This had been the third morning that you’ve been woken up by someone doing their chores. You groaned when you suddenly remember you had chores to do too.

“Arthur,” You muttered into his chest. He smelled like dirt and the faintest smell of lilacs. He really loved smelling like a fruity woman didn’t he? He just had to have those bars of soap that smelled like springtime flowers. You weren’t surprised though, because he did love flowers and he loved giving them to you.

Your sleepy cowboy groaned as well, letting out a sour sigh and pulled you closer, “Just a few more minutes,” His voice was in that sexy rough tone he only had in the morning.

Honestly, you would have loved to go back to sleep, but you were a much lighter sleeper than Arthur. The man could sleep through anything! Colem O’driscoll could show up any second and start shooting up the place and Arthur would be fast asleep like the big baby he was. 

“Arthur, I have to get up-”

“No! Noooo!” He grabbed ahold of you so tight that you started having trouble to breathe. He whined and cried, “No, (Y/N). Please, just a few more minutes and I’ll get up. I swear.” You knew that was a lie. He’d fall right back to sleep and he’d trap you there in his arms. Not that you wanted to be there, but you’d rather just get up and start the day.

You pried him off you, ignoring his protests and gave his forehead a light kiss. He begged for another one and like always, you gave in. Arthur laid there in your shared and skinny bed, watching you get dressed. You kept your back to him, which he didn’t mind. Your ass looked just as perfect and good as it always did, and it was by far his favorite part of your features.

“We should do something later,” Arthur said after he yawned. You were surprised that he was still even awake. Maybe he was going to get up after all?

“Like what?” You slipped your hands into each sleeve of your shirt, then started buttoning it up from the bottom up.

Arthur rolled out of bed, just nude as you were a few seconds ago. He threw on a pair of pants and said, “I don’t know,” He mumbled it out so all the words got stuck together, “Maybe we can... I don’t know, go to town? Get a hotel for the night and sleep in for once?”

You mulled it over, “Sure,” You finally said, “I’d love to do that,” You smiled at him wide, walking over to finishing the buttons he had left on his shirt, “It’s a date.” The two of you shared a quick kiss before departing. You both had a very long day ahead of you. ________________________________________________

How many hours did you slave away today? From dawn to dusk, mostly. The sun was already setting and you had nearly finished all your chores. You took the camp inventory, you went and got the needed supplies, you unloaded the supplies and put them away, you washed the dishes from breakfast and fed all the horses. 

You were busy helping Pearson with tonight’s dinner, you were by the pot, string the stew slowly and taking in the alluring smell of food. There was a sudden presence on your head, you looked up as Arthur plotted his hat down on your hair. There was a smile on his face, you hadn’t seen since this morning. He must have been away on that stagecoach job you heard Hosea talking about earlier.

“Busy?” He asked, gazing down at you with a fondness only you knew.

You had to gaze back, making sure Pearson was busy, “Not really,” You dropped the oversized spoon back into the pot, “Just cooking.” You took Arthur’s hat odd and held it in your hands, returning his smile, “Why?”

He snuck a little closer to you, he smelled like gun powder and cigarettes. He leaned down to meet your heigh and stole a kiss, “Let’s get out of here,” There was a twinkle in his eyes, begging you to say yes.

Pressing your lips together into a thin line, then smiling wide you played coy, “I don’t knooow...” You trailed off, then got on your tiptoes to put his hat back on his head, “I’m a little busy, I’ve got so much to do,” You didn’t have anything to do, but you wanted to hear him beg.

Arthur gave you this harmless glare, “Really now?” He put his hands on his belt, standing tall and he looked around, “Doesn’t look like there is anything to do. What’s got you so busy, miss?” 

You giggled at his little attempts at flirting. You felt bashful as your cheeks started to heat up, “You know,” You dragged on your words, “This and that,” You took a step closer to Arthur and put your finger on his chest, “What’s got you wanting to get out of here?”

It was always fun to flirt with him, to be coy and distance while being close and intimate at the same time. You could see Arthur’s brain working up a reply as he stood there as firm as a wall. You glanced around, keen on not letting the other see you two flirting so much. You’d be in a storm of teasing if anyone caught you too.

“I’d love to show such a pretty lady a night on the town,” Arthur loosely grabbed your hand at his chest, the brought it up to his lips for a quick kiss, “Take you out for a real dinner,” You both shared a glance at the pot of stew, “Maybe sleep in a real bed?” God that all sounded so nice. You wanted to keep up your game for a bit longer though.

It wasn’t easy to step away from him, but you did so slowly and only a few by a few inches, “Oh gosh, that all sounds so nice. You’d do that for me?”

Arthur wasn’t going to let you play this game and slip between his fingers. You riled him up and with an evil little smirk, you step away again when he got closer. You were ready to sprint away and make him chase you but he was too quick and caught you in his arms. Trapped against his chest and in his arms, Arthur looked down on you with his own evil smirk, “I’d do anything for you, anything you’d like,” He got close your ear, you felt his beard tickle your check and neck, “Anything.” 

You were all hot and bothered now, just by that one action. You wiggled in his arms, “You’re the devil, Arthur Morgan.” His grip on you loosened.

“You’re just as devilish, (Y/N) (L/N),” He was right to some extent. You weren’t innocent either, standing there give him that look, that smirk that told him he’d have to work for his prize.

Well, you were convinced, you looked at him and stepped away while grabbing his hand and holding it tight, “Come on then, Mister Morgan, let’s go out on this date you want so bad.”

The sweet sound of his low chuckle made your heart scream as the two of you walked over to your horses while holding hands. Like the gentleman he was, he helped you on your horse, then got on his own. You set off for Valentine, enjoying the peacefulness of the ride there. You were so happy to get away from the camp for the first time in weeks. Especially with Arthur. Alone... With Arthur.

The ride was short, you were thankful for that. Arthur had been so kind as to buy a room and a bath for the night. He told you to head on over to the bathroom, he’d meet you there after he bought something from across the street at the store.

Walking down the hallway, you could hear others through the thin walls. Many people here had the same idea as you. You found the bath and stripped down immediately and jumped into the hot and steam tub. The water washed away all the dirt that started to cling to your skin. It felt so nice to soak. Just as you reached the peak of bath glory, the door opened and Arthur let himself in.

“Well, howdy mister,” You slid down under the bubble, being sure to cover your bits and smiled at Arthur, “Are you here to help me? How much do you cost?”

He laughed at that while shutting the door, “I’m all yours, for free, and as long as you want,” It didn’t take him very long to wave you over to make room, and climb into the tub. The water splashed up and the tub overflowed with an extra person in it. Arthur sat with his back to the rim and he pulled you over between his legs so that your back was to his chest.

You scooted down, lowering yourself into the water and wiggled while giggling. Arthur quickly wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you back, “Where do you think you're going?” he playfully growled. You could lean your head back right under his chin, and looked up with a grin.

“No where! Just getting comfy,” You riggled in his arms and unhooked his hands around you, “You aren’t the most comfortable seat, you know?” He knew.

The two of you shared more chuckles. You reached forward towards the side table and grabbed a bar of soap, “Do you mind?”

“Not at all, my darling,”

It was nice. Arthur’s hands were smooth and rough at the same time. He was gentle with the bar of soap and his hands going over your skin. The warm water was refreshing. You wished you could bathe every day, maybe someday you’d have a house all your own with its own bathroom. You loved it, and you loved that you could get away and do this with Arthur. The two of you rarely got enough time to really enjoy each other’s company. The gang was more important than your relationship some days. It was straining and hard, so you were extremely grateful to get this time alone with Arthur.

The bath was perfect, it was very intimate, bathing each other and stealing kisses and bites every now and then. He was a devilish man. He’d nip your neck, hard enough to leave a mark and for you to squeal out.

“Arthur!” You whisper yelled. He just gave you this look that said I didn’t do that while grinning wildly. He’d do it again a few seconds later, this time biting even harder and right in the crook of your neck and shoulder. 

This time you spun around, facing him as you sat on your knees, “You tryna fight? Huh!?” Still, he just gave you that cheeky grin.

“Maybe,” Oh damn him! 

You lunged forward, going right for his own neck while your hands pressed against his chest and held him in place. Oh, how he tried to fight it, but you were too quick. Your teeth latched onto his skin, right in that sweet spot below his ear. You bite nice and hard, hoping to leave a purple spot on neck. Water splashed out of the tub and soaked the floor.

Arthur let out a growl and snaked his arms around your waist and brought you closer. His low thunder growl sent chills up your spine. He was much stronger than you and used that to his advantage. He held you down in place, pulled himself away, “Woman! You watch yourself!”

You were face to face, inches apart. You grinned, then lift your eyebrows, making a puppy dog look, “Or what?”

That sparked his interest and cause lightning bolts to shoot through his entire body. Arthur gave you this nasty, nasty look, “Get up,” He said, pushing you off him, “Get the fuck up and get that fucking room upstairs before I destroy you here right now.” Ooooh you got to him. You could tell. 

You bit your lip and played along, “Okay,” You stood up, making sure you did so slowly so Arthur could enjoy the show. He watched as the water rolled off your skin, making you glow in the lantern light. Every curve, every feature stuck out to him and he couldn’t take his eyes off you.

When you got out of the tub, he leaned over the rim and smacked your ass as hard as he could, “Hurry up,” His voice was low like the rumble of a waterfall, “Don’t keep me waiting now,”

You yipped out at the sound of the crisp smack he gave you. Your rear end stung a little and left your skin tingling, “Why don’t you make me?” You looked over your shoulder at him with that same puppy dog look.

Oh good god, you did it again. You knew every button to push to get him going and all riled up. You hurried out of the bathroom, wearing one of the hotel robes that they offered. Before you left the bathroom, you were sure to give Arthur one more dirty look, sticking your tongue out at him in a sexy way that said use me.

God this was nice. A short vacation, yes, but a much-needed one. You couldn’t wait for Arthur to join you upstairs. The night had only just started. Thank god, you were so happy to finally get away from all the work of the camp. Finally, you could unwind and sleep in and honestly, fuck the shit out of your cowboy sweetheart. What perfect way to end the day.