#i suck at finishing games and this has been me trying to stay motivated lol

[misplacedraven]

Did a screencap redraw of one of my favorite moments in Twilight Princess. Wanted to contribute this to Linktober, but uh... I kinda missed that deadline lol

[inhuman-obey-me]

What are your thoughts on OG obey me not getting anymore lessons after 80? It worries me because it kinda feels like they are trying to kill it slowly.... This is making me not enjoy nightbringer because i thought i would be a spin off new game with a new story that we could play while waiting for OG obey me to come with season 5, but now it seams like nightbringer will be their only foucus and season 5 will never happen. Sorry this kinda turned into a rant just not liking what's happening now.

Yeah, we weren't too happy when we first heard about it, which was the AMA the devs did on Reddit. It was a shitty way to release that information, and it sucks that they really only said so when people ASKED if OG was going to get season 5/more lessons. It did create backlash right away, which we guess they were...attempting to avoid in the first place lol. But they definitely should have handled that announcement a lot better than they did.

In terms of what it means for the future of OG, we don't think they are trying to kill it per se so much as they just sort of...wrote themselves into a corner, and this was their way of hitting reset, on that and other things.

(no need to apologize for ranting, ours is even longer LOL -- rest under the cut!)

We definitely have some criticisms of the writing in Season 4, particularly how they squandered much of what was narratively set up in Season 3, and they didn't really set anything up on where it goes from there. It's also unfortunate that the original game is just going to be doing the same events as Nightbringer, rather than separate ones, which just means there's really nothing to motivate people to stay. And in that way, it does also sort of feel like a waste of all the effort people have put in to strengthen up our cards and grind affection and stuff, because we can't transfer ANY of that. They probably hope to continue that both sides will make money for them, but realistically speaking, it does feel like they are effectively just pushing everyone to migrate to the new game, and that the original is being sort of abandoned to just a maintenance mode kind of thing.

One thing they did note about the decision was that Ruri Tunes was originally supposed to just be an additional mode, but they decided to split it off as part of a separate Nightbringer game/story in order to not make the original "unplayable" with all they wanted to add and change "under the hood". Part of that, at least at a guess, may be due to the difficulty curve of the original -- despite them adjusting the difficulty in a patch, plus their zero-AP lesson battle promo campaigns, they probably were seeing a lot of drop-off just for people who gave up because they couldn't make it through those earlier lessons to even finish Seasons 2, 3, and 4. In that sense, it's good and bad to shift the continuation of the story to this new game even though they don't seem to have actually learned their lesson with the difficulty curve problem... But that's another thing they get to hit reset on by making a new game.

As for a Season 5, we do know from the same AMA that the story from the original is supposed to "continue" in Nightbringer, which suggests that it might pick back up from the end of Season 4 as effectively a Season 5, like maybe MC will make it back to their own time and continue from there, just in this other game instead of the original. Which, um, is certainly a choice on their part, especially since not everyone has the time or interest in a rhythm game. It kinda feels also a bit like this sudden time travel thing in Nightbringer may almost be a way of buying them some time while they figure out what to do as a continuation to the OG plot.

All of that said, however, considering the lack of direction for the original, we've actually been really enjoying Nightbringer's story! It dives into a lot of super interesting questions and content that fans have been begging for and brings back some of the darker themes from Season 1 that we've really missed, so even though it's not quite the Season 5 we've been waiting for, we're really hyped for the new content to keep coming!

[lavender-laney]

tag game, writing questions

Thank you @lexiklecksi for the tag! Their post :)

These writing questions were fun to answer!

What is your absolute all-time favourite ideas you’ve ever had?

Probably the concept of Acrylic Body? It's an issue because I love the idea but I'm having trouble executing it, so I think that's how I know it's a good idea lol.

Is there a question you’ve been asked in the past that really stands out to you, and you still think about sometimes?

Probably not exactly what this question was looking for, but! A few times I've mentioned to people that I'm a writer, and they'll say something like, "Oh, what have you written? Can I read some of your work?" and I have to say no because I've never actually finished anything! I don't have something I can hand over and be like "Oh, here's a short story I wrote," or "Here's a book I'm trying to get published!" This is one of my greatest motivators, and why I think about it often. I want to finish a project so I can have something to show for being a so-called writer.

What is your favourite part of being a writer? What parts could you take or leave?

I love the feeling that comes with being inspired. I love when I'm in the zone where I'm just writing restlessly, my fingers can barely keep up with my thoughts, and I'm feeling like the story is playing out in front of me. I could definitely do without perfectionism and writer's block, though.

What is your greatest motivation to write/create?

Kind of like what I said in the second question - having something to represent my hard work. Less shallow, however, I do just love writing. I always have. I love coming up with things, re-reading parts that I'm proud of and knowing I made that. I can't say feedback from other people isn't also a huge motivator, though. If I hadn't had a reputation as writing being my "thing" growing up, I'm honestly not sure if I would've stuck with it.

What is the best piece of advice you’ve ever read or been given as a writer?

I love this quote from Jodi Picoult: "You might not write well every day, but you can always edit a bad page. You can't edit a blank page." It really helps me focus less on my work being perfect and more just having some sort of base to start with, even if it sucks.

What do you wish you knew when you were first starting out writing?

When I first started writing in elementary school, I was very much innocent and starry-eyed and thought I was the most amazing writer, even when I was writing silly little Warriors fanfics. I wish I'd known to hold onto that optimistic and confident attitude a little tighter.

What is your favourite story you’ve written to completion? Link it if you’d like and can!

Still haven't written anything to completion, buuut I am very much planning to reach that goal with Choking on Sea Salt!

What is your favorite out-of-the-box quote?

Probably that same quote by Jodi Picoult! It's one of the only ones that has really stuck with me. Plus, just anything by Mary Oliver always stays with me.

Which of your characters would you say has the most controversial mindset? Why do you say so, and how do you personally feel about their ideals?

In terms of protagonists, I think Sadie's unending curiosity and hunger for knowledge can (and will 🤭) lead to some questionable ways of getting information. In terms of all characters, though, the main antagonist of Choking on Sea Salt (who will be revealed in chapter 2) is definitely unhinged and not in a fun way. Let's say there's a reason he's being haunted by malevolent forces.

If you, when you first started writing, met you now, what would younger you think?

I hope she would think I'm cool! She might be a little disappointed I haven't written a book yet or been published or become a world famous author (11 year old me was very ambitious), but I think she'd like what I'm working on. She'd probably be very confused that I'm a reporter of all writing-related careers, though. I'm confused about that too, though, to be honest lol.

[its-ya-boi-autumn]

Hope your day is going well can we get a sexy aggressive chrollo punishing their s/o for acting bratty? Thank you! ❤️

I've been in such a horni boi mood it's actually concerning

also, I’m posting this for 1.3k! Thank you guys and I apologize for the thousandth time for my lousy schedule with writing, this has been in my inbox as have many more and I plan to bust them out when I get the motivation. Thank you for sticking with me and still enjoying my content despite the fact that I’m a little slow, your support and patience is appreciated a lot :’) I suck at talking about emotions but I’m trying to be genuine I know I suck at it. I hope you enjoy this~ (I was uncomfy as hell meaning it’s a good one lol)

You couldn’t help the smirk that edged at your lips as the door slammed shut behind you. The click of a lock signaled your exit being sealed before you were spun around and slammed against the nearest wall, caging you in with his strong arms. Chrollo’s face was threateningly close, his lips allowed quick gusts of air to brush up against your own.

“Aww why are you all upset with me?” your tone was whiny and by God was it annoying. His grey gaze was hard on your face, clearly he’d had enough. You wiggled beneath him, your hands making way up his chest. He wasn’t having it, immediately taking your wrists and pinning them above your head. The mere force stole a rather erotic gasp straight from your throat. It was rare for his patience to run so thin and only you could get him here. But this was exactly what you wanted, and he knew it. Chrollo inhaled deeply before speaking.

“You know damn well why I’m upset with you. I’m not playing your little games tonight. Now is not the time y/n.” the way your name spilled from his mouth sent sparks fluttering around your thighs. Your hips drifted forward before coming into contact with his own.

“It definitely feels like you do~ come on Chrollo, please~?” you weren’t one to give up very easily which was initially what he liked about you. But tonight wasn’t the night for that. He’d have to leave with the troupe in 30 minutes and that was nowhere near enough time to punish you properly.

“I said no.” his voice stayed firm but your legs felt like jelly and you let your body sink against the wall, arms still high above your head. The way your mouth parted in a subtle moan mixed with your slack figure was a sight to behold and he didn’t know how much longer he’d hold off. Especially with your front rubbing up against his hard on.

“Even if you don’t fuck me you’ll have to fix your little friend down there.” you teased, rutting yourself again him again. You were granted a growl from somewhere in his chest, goosebumps slithering all over your skin. Your arms, your thighs, your chest, tingled with the need to be touched. You looked up at him with pleading eyes. He knew you were in need and you’d act like this until you got what you wanted. In fact the more he thought about it the riskier it may have been to leave you like this. For all he knew his phone would be blown up with explicits of your nude form and that was the last thing he needed on the job. You couldn’t fix it yourself since that little sweet spot was too far back for you to reach with your own slender fingers, and he’d refused you any toys unless he specifically used them on you because of his love for your desperation for him. And you were right. He’d have to fix himself before leaving, and Chrollo didn’t finish quickly.

You watched as his thoughts unfolded and you knew he was contemplating it. You sunk your teeth into your bottom lip, hoping he’d give in. Before you knew it you were spun around again, chest and face pressed up against the wall. His breath laid heavy near your ear. He said nothing but he didn’t have to. The throbbing of his cock on your ass said enough. The hand not holding your wrists roughly wound itself up your shirt, tugging insistently on the sensitive bud of your breast. You noticed he couldn’t help but rut himself through his jeans onto your clothed behind. The feeling made you giggle, earning a sharp smack on the ass. Your gasp only made him harder.

Chrollo knew it was a bad idea to draw this out, but your attitude warranted no reward. He needed to see you begging and pleading for him, though currently it seemed as if he were begging for you with the way he was dry humping you. He needed to switch things up a bit.

The feeling of his body parting from yours was cold and sudden, drawing a whine from you. The bulge beneath his zipper was beyond obvious, licking your lips at the sight. You watched your lover make his way for the bed, taking off his black blazer and setting it to the side. Chrollo plopped down on the sheets, patting his thighs.

“Come here princess.” his voice was low, no room for disobedience. You simply did as told, parting your thighs to seat yourself upon his thigh. He stopped you, smirking.

“Not like that,” he started, the look in his eyes hearing your core, “bend over for me.”

It took a moment for the command to process, but he waited. You gulped, sliding off his thigh to bend yourself over them. Your breathing became quite shallow, slight fear taking over your senses. His hand gently placed itself atop your behind, causing you to jump at the contact. This made him chuckle. It showed you hadn’t been quite ready.

“Hands behind your back.” and you did just that, crossing them behind the small of your back. Chrollo gripped your forearms and held them in place. The slight pressure arched your back enough for a slight pang of pain to elicit more wetness to your panties. His hand left your ass, leaving the anticipation of his next move to roll around your head.

“I should be leaving soon, but you’ve been a little too bratty for my liking tonight.” he mumbled, more to himself than to you, but you could still hear it. You scoffed.

“I had barely done anything~” you tried to coax him more. A white hot pain stung your ass cheek, followed by a resounding smack bouncing off the walls. You arched at the feeling, digging your teeth into his thigh. He hit you again.

“Lift your head up, I’d like to hear you.” Chrollo ordered your already shaking form. You tried, but it was it good enough for him. Another stinging smack against your skin. He hadn’t even taken your leggings off just yet but you could feel the welt already rising beneath the fabric. Chrollo hit so hard sometimes you had to hold back on the safe word, you knew he’d only gotten started and it’d only piss him off more. Though he’d stop if you asked him.

But all you wanted right now was for him to fuck you, though he didn’t even have the time to do so.

Another slap but this time to the sensitive spot at the very top of your thigh. The moan you let out surprised both of you. It had been louder than expected. Chrollo laughed.

“My my, you’re even needier than I thought sweetheart.” the teasing tone made your blood boil. He was one to talk. You wriggled around in his lap, trying to also get some friction for yourself between your legs. This, of course, earned you yet another smack to your upper thighs.

“Fuck just take them off already!” you whined to Chrollo. Your leggings had become so insufferably constricting and there was almost nothing you could do about it. Chrollo of course found your discomfort amusing but obliged to your wish, tugging the waistband down just enough so it set at the tops of your thighs. It wasn’t exactly what you wanted but it would have to do. You just wanted him to touch you, that was all you needed.

The palm of his hand smoothed over your bare rear, sending sparks of fire across your swollen skin. You jolted at the touch on the welted skin, your hips jumping up slightly. Chrollo slapped your ass once more for good measure, ghosting his hand across your core. His touch made you gasp, keening backwards for more. Another sharp smack.

“Don’t move.” the command had you clenching around nothing, soaking yourself.

“Chrollo please, I need you.” and so began the begging, your voice wobbly from the eagerness of your needs. The hand on your ass spread your cheek a little to the side, exposing cold air to your wet clothed cunt. It made you whimper, willing everything in you to stay still. He parted your thighs for a peek. Chrollo was rather pleased to see that your body’s primal had taken over. Just as he wanted.

“You want me to touch you, don’t you dearest?” the question was rhetorical. It was obvious what you wanted though you nodded anyway. He spanked you again.

“Speak.”

“Yes Chrollo!”

“Yes what?”

“Yes I want- want you to touch me.” your response wavered, the sudden shame flooding in your chest. Cheeks–both sets–red and burning, Chrollo gave you another harsh blow, tears threatening to fall from your eyes. “Chrollo please!” you tried again, wanting nothing more than his fingers to slip between your folds and prod at that sweet spot in the very back of your pussy. He did as you asked, sliding your ruined panties to the side to reveal your glistening heat, met with chill air all over again. Again your back arched at the sensation, toes curling and mouth hanging open. His middle and ring fingers gather your slick before dipping beneath your inner folds and caressing your walls shallowly. The sigh of relief you let out sent shivers all over your body.

“That feels good doesn’t it angel?” his pet names made your clit twitch. He knew every way to make you submit to him, taking pleasure in your despair. He delved deeper, stretching your pussy with a third finger before gently poking the spongey patch on your upper wall. Your legs started to shake, hips rocking in his lap. Rather than thrusting his digits in and out he simply focused all of his attention on that one patch, poking and rubbing against it generously.

Discharge had began to collect around his fingers, signaling your closeness so early. He withdrew his hands from you, picking you up and pinning you to the bed. He reached into his side table drawer and pulled out the leather handcuffs you’d bought, the purple glitter shining from the lamplight. Chrollo cuffed you to the headboard before getting up from the bed.

“H-hey! Where are you going?” you called out as he walked across the room. He opened the closet doors, rummaging through for something. He held whatever he found behind his back, closing the closet doors back up. He waltzed back over to the bed, revealing the wand in his hand. Checking his watch, he sighed.

“I guess it’s time for me to go now,” he started, plugging the wand into the wall next to your shared bed. He stuffed it between your legs, pressing it against your aching clit roughly. Chrollo turned the setting up so medium and your body instantly reacted. Your thighs clenched around the toy, rutting against it for some friction. His hand came down upon your ass once more making you cry out.

“Don’t come until I get back, understand?” he asked, already knowing the answer. He grabbed his blazer back up and fixed himself up some, just fo be safe. He could fix his little problem in his pants when he found a bathroom, though he wouldn’t have to worry about your antics until he got home. “You’re just gonna leave me like this?” you complained, shaking and tugging at the cuffs that bound your wrists.

“I’ll come back, but I want you to learn your lesson.” he said before leaving the room, you lying in bed, your release so close but always so far.

[leejeongz]

nsfw a-z YOSHI (treasure)

🔅 for @ateezwhorez i hope you enjoy this honey 🥺❤️ dw the others should be written soon tooooo 🔅

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

he just feels cuddly and swoony. he’s in love with you, even more so than before even though he didn’t think that was possible. he loves to cuddle with you, just until you catch your breath again at least. he’s still still high from the whole experience, it’s the perfect time to be open and show your vulnerability even more. it’s less about the physical things he does for you, more about how you two deepen your relationship even further. he uses this time to have deep chats that slowly fade into more light hearted conversations before drifting off to sleep.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

his eyes are his favourite thing about him i think. he likes how you can understand what he wants just from looking into them. they’re intense and needy, oppressive even. they’re infatuating. they’re his secret weapon to make you obey him without even realising what you’re doing.

on you, he likes your lips. he likes how they feel on his own lips, on his neck, around his dick, anywhere and everywhere. he also just thinks they look pretty and are the perfect colour naturally, actually something he noticed about you first which he found really attractive.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

doesn’t like to make a mess at first… might even cum in a tissue the first few times because he thinks it’s more respectful.

but when he’s comfortable and such, he’d love to cum all over your hands after you finished him off with a handjob, he thinks it looks really hot and it’s enough to get him horny again hehe.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

he often imagines how you'd look tied up in front of him. at his disposal. his fantasies are actually super kinky but he very rarely tells you them. he’d probably never tie you up to the extent that he dreams of doing because he doesn’t want to hurt you and he thinks of you as quite fragile 🥺

i wanna do another because my wild card was kinda short this time but he would l o v e to do a life drawing of you. like this isn’t even sexual but i don’t wanna get attacked if i write this on something that is fluff lol. it would be something that he’d treasure and something that he would be so proud of. to make it dirty since it’s a dirty secret 👀 he had a few intrusive thoughts while he drew you and found it super hard to stay hyperfocused on the drawing. if you tried to flirt with him while modelling, he’d just tell you to save it for later and that’s when he’d unleash the beast lol.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

1 sexual partner with whom he was in a relationship with. he doesn’t think about it much and when he’s with you, he’s very much focused on you. one look at you and he’s forgotten about them already.

he knows what he’s doing for the most part, but sometimes he just wants to learn new things with you, together.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

he likes facing you: missionary and cowgirl, depending on what feels natural at the time. he likes bringing his face close to yours and hovering his lips over yours, occasionally touching with every thrust. enough to feel the other’s breath, but not enough to actually kiss.

once the pace has slowed a little, he’ll give you the kiss he’s been teasing you with for what feels like hours just so that you’ll appreciate it and enjoy it all the more.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

he’s quite serious in the moment. he wants to make sure that you’re enjoying yourself and that he’s doing the absolute most to exceed any expectations each and every time.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

he naturally doesn’t have much hair down there. he trims what he has and keeps it tidy since he feels it’s more intimate.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

most of the time, he’s extremely romantic during sex. he’s very into slow and sensual sex that allows you two to bond physically and emotionally. it’s important to him that he understands your wants and needs as his partner and vice versa, making the whole experience super romantic.

but that’s not all the time. sometimes he just wants to rip off your clothes and have his way with you and that’s ✨totally fine✨

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

i feel like he’s a typical laptop on desk, tissues besides him type of guy. he doesn’t do it too often, but when he does he has to fully commit because there is absolutely no way he’s stopping for anything/anyone that isn’t you.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

he’s not that kinky, he’s a vanilla man. i’ll just list some sexual things that he likes hehe

whispering- he likes when you whisper close to his ear and he likes doing it to you. the tingling down his neck is intoxicating, he can’t help but want to feel it again and again. what you say is important too. he likes receiving praise. saying things like “you make me so wet” or “you turn me on so much” makes him so happy, it’s a great way to drive him crazy.

ropes- not to an extreme level, just one rope to tie your hands together behind you or in front of you.

eye contact- he likes that his eyes intimidate you of course, but you pushing past that and maintaining eye contact makes him feel a rush to MAKE you feel intimidated. he wants you to feel like he’s in charge (even if he’s not) and if he can’t do that with his eyes, then it’s pretty much over for him, but he likes that fact that you stood up to him and it turns him tf on.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

he likes sex in bed or on the floor. anywhere that he or you can lie comfortably. he likes fucking you in hotel beds. although it’s not really that dirty, it is for you two.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

gentle strokes- he likes when you trace his jawline or collarbones with your fingers, especially when you have long nails. he almost always returns the favour. he likes gently dragging his finger up and down your thigh before and between rubbing your pussy.

directness- tell him you’re turned on. tell him why you’re turned on. tell him how he turned you on. tell him how you feel and why you think he should feel the same way to. by the end of your talk, he’s gurenteed to feel the same way.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

angry sex/sex during an argument.

he wants to settle things properly first. sex isn’t a solution nor is it forgiveness. the only way he can truly be intimate with you is when you’re both happy and when you’re both on the same page. “angry” sex like that is meaningless to him, the argument mustn’t have been important if you can just forget about it so why can’t you just talk it through?

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

he’s naturally a giver and oral (sex in general) is no exception. he wants you to be able to allow yourself to receive instead of forcing it upon you if you’re not used to it. he introduces his tongue slowly and always asks if what he’s doing is okay. even if you are used to it, he’s always gonna build up to it. he likes when you take the lead even when he’s eating you out, he likes when you’re giving him directions or your hands are in his hair, controlling him, because then he knows that what he’s doing is right.

not too fussed about receiving head. of course he would never say no, but he’s not one to ask for one just to finish without pleasuring you. he’s eyes are closed during the whole thing and and he lets out small, quiet cusses which he knows turn you on. also says nice stuff to you (when he can get the words out) while you’re sucking his dick because 🥺 he is nice.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

as i mentioned before, he’s slow and sensual. he keeps the experience extremely romantic and memorable. it leaves you wanting more and he knows.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

not his style. at all. he likes to draw out the details, take his time with you, ensure you've both been treated and pleasured sufficiently.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

he’d only experiment with things that you’d tried before or things you’ve researched. he doesn’t wanna try anything new to the pair of you especially early on because he doesn’t wanna hurt you or leave a bad impression or anything like that. he’d never spring anything on you that you hadn’t discusssed either.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

2-3 rounds, but it totally depends on you. how much you want, how much you turn him on after, how tired you are etc.

he usually lasts for around 20 mins but needs like a 10 second breather sometimes

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

i don’t see him owning any toys but i don’t think he’d be opposed to using them. if you wanted to use them, great fantastic he’d get straight to it. he would definitely like to try them for himself at least once too.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

he doesn’t tease you much, because he’d rather just do it? but i guess if you’d consider extended foreplay to the point where you have to beg him to fuck you as teasing then he’s the master lol. oH and also doesn’t just kiss you during sex, he definitely teases with those.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

tries to hold his moans and cusses back but fails lol. they’re quiet and soft but you can still hear them. he gets kind of shy about them after sex too and he doesn’t really like it when you bring it up.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

“take it off” he orders, looking directly at your chest. you remove your tshirt on command and throw it to the ground. he walks towards you, backing you into the wall behind you. it was a harsh and sudden coldness on your back, but there was something even colder in front of you. his eyes glared at you, which subconsciously made you remove your bra.

“so fucking beautiful” he growled while taking one of your breasts in his hand. it wasn’t long before he started with his tongue. he circled your nipple with his tongue while he played with the other one in his hand. your head automatically fell back, luckily resting on the wall. he slowly began to flick your nipple with his tongue before gently kissing it and moving to the other one.

your hand found its way to his hair, grabbing it and pulling it a little. you occasionally let out small gasps, which almost always made him look up at you and smile.

after a few minutes, he stood up once again, head buried in your neck as he whispered what he wanted you to do for him next.

“please, make me cum. you've turned me on so much tonight.”

that’s when it all started making sense. you’d been bowling that night with friends. this involved a lot of bending over, a lot of casual skin touches when neither of you were bowling and a LOT of whispering closely in his ear since the music was so loud. you knew he liked it when you whispered, but you didn’t know even in that context that it would send shivers down your spine. you stored that info, maybe you’d use that against him one day after he’d been teasing you.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

i think average, with just a little under average thickness. i’m not sure if you can ever call a dick pretty but i feel with yoshi it would be justified, especially when it’s hard.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

i’m pretty sure it varies depending on your type of relationship. if you are a romantic partner, 3-4 times a week. if it’s just a fling, once maybe twice a week at most. he has a naturally high sex drive, but he’s less likely to take his time with someone he has no feelings for meaning he doesn’t really crave sex as often as he would with someone he’s romantically involved with.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

as i mentioned above, yoshi wants to talk to you and connect with you even further after sex. he falls asleep when he’s ready to fall asleep, which is after he’s learnt something about you that makes his heart flutter, that he can tease you about later on.

[softyoongiionly]

NSFW A-Z List (Mama Mia! Jungkook)

***This contains smut, 18+ only please***

“Aqua told me you all had some questions for me so, I had my assistant fax me the prompt and, I’m really hoping she didn’t read it because, these are filthy ha. I hope you all enjoy yourselves.” 

A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex):

“It kind of depends on the situation but, if I just had sex, I’m in a good mood. If Y/N and I are in the bed, I make sure I change the sheets and, I make sure she’s cleaned up and, feeling good too. Sometimes we like to talk about it. A bit of pillow talk is always great. PILLOWW TALK! Do you guys remember that song by that one dude in one direction? Great song. It’s like he left one direction and, immediately needed to say the word fuck and sing about sex.” 

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s):

“This is a weird question. I like my abs? I guess? I mean I spent like a million hours in the gym trying to tone up and stuff so, it’s definitely the only thing that stands out.” 

“Y/N is the by far the most beautiful woman on the planet so, it’s a little hard to pin point one specific part of her I like the most. If I had to choose, I would say her eyes. Sometimes she looks at me and, I suddenly forget all three languages I speak. She takes my breath away. Literally, who is she looking at like that? Me? Does she value my life at all? Is she trying to kill me? Probably. I love her :-)” 

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person):

“Cum...I don’t really know what I’m supposed to talk about in this section so, I’m just gonna say- yes?? Is that the right answer?” 

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs):

“One time, when Y/N was away on business, I jerked off so much in one day, I sprained my hand. I guess that isn’t dirty but, it is embarrassing. I’d probably do it again though, I’m so spoiled that I forgot what’s its like to go without sex.” 

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?):

“Yikes this question is a little hard for me to answer. Before meeting Y/N, I had a lot of different partners. After finding out my half-brother tried to steal my recipe, I got really down on myself. I felt really empty and, I spent a lot of time partying and, hooking up with random people. I don’t really know how many if I’m being honest. It was a lot though. After awhile I kind of snapped out of it and, realized I needed to deal with my issues head on so, after a bit of therapy, I was doing a lot better. Sexually, I’ve had a lot of experience but, intimacy? That’s a lot newer for me. And let me tell you my dudes, nothing is sexier than being with someone who truly loves and cares for you. I don’t make the rules.” 

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. Will probably include a visual):

“Missionary. Listen, I know it’s a boring answer but, I’m a sucker for passion what can I say? I like watching her face and, seeing all the little expressions she makes, especially right when I first push inside of her. Also, it’s the best position for her to scratch up my back and, I really love when she does that.” 

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc):

“I don’t really find a lot of things to laugh about during sex but, I’m sure it’s happened at some point. Sex is kind of a serious thing for me now but, I wouldn’t stay serious if something funny happened because, sometimes funny things do happen. When they do, we laugh but, then I’m right back in the moment again. Y/N and I mess around a lot in our daily lives so, I like to use sex as a way to show her how serious I am about her and, our relationship.” 

H = Hair (How well-groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.):

“I got laser hair removal like 3 years ago. Yes, it’s possible to get it done in sensitive areas but, it’s crazy expensive. Or so I’ve heard, I’m not gonna lie to you, my idea of expensive and, other people’s idea of expensive are probably a little different. But yeah, I got it all lasered off so, it doesn’t really grow there anymore. I keep my face shaved too but, my arms and legs are free to grow all the hair they want.” 

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…):

“With Y/N, I’m a little bit of a hopeless romantic, I can’t lie. I love all of that cheesy shit. Rose petals on the bed? Yes. Wine and chocolate on the shores of our private beach? At least twice a week. Leaving Y/N little post it notes all over our villa that contain all the things I love about her? Duh. I AM A SAP. I AM A MESS. I can’t help myself. My father collects first edition classic novels and, for Valentine’s Day, I had him send me the contact of his distributor so, I could buy Y/N the first edition of The Princess Bride. It’s one of her favorites. It was only $1,400 so, I definitely got a good deal. I also had a custom gown imported from France and, a prince-like outfit made for me. What do princes even wear? What is that called? Tights? I don’t know but, I looked like a goddamn Disney prince by the time I was done getting ready. I rented a different villa out for the weekend and, my interior designer decorated it like a medieval castle. We spent the weekend playing prince and princess and, it was probably one of the best weekends of my life. So to answer your question: Yes, I am romantic.”

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon):

“I only really touch myself when Y/N is away. Her and I have a pretty consistent sex life so, we have sex almost every day, sometimes multiple times a day. I don’t really have a need for it anymore and, it doesn’t feel nearly as good as sex with Y/N.”

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks):

“I have a few. I’m really sensitive to smells so, if Y/N smells good, I can’t keep my hands off of her. She has this one perfume from Gucci that I love so much. I can get hard just from the smell; it’s kind of pathetic honestly. I love  having sex outside too. It’s a good thing we have a private strip of the beach because, if we had neighbors nearby, they would hate us ha. I have a cashmere picnic blanket that we take down there a few times a week and, we always end up making love on it. Yes, I said making love. Get over it. Oh and, if Y/N says anything about my muscles or how strong I am? Instant turn on. I think I have a praise kink? Is that what it’s called? I love Y/N’s panties too. Lace, silk, cotton, clean or dirty; I don’t discriminate, just put them in my mouth. Lol, this is getting dirty…sorry Aqua.”

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do):

“I already kind of answered this but, sex on the beach or sex on our balcony are probably my top two.”

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going):

“I feel like I answered this one too because, I just talked about my kinks but, I would say my motivation is to get my girl off right? I get off easily. I have a beautiful woman all over me, saying dirty things in my ear… I mean, my orgasm is guaranteed. Y/N doesn’t take a long time to cum anymore because; I know how to please my woman but, I still want her to feel good. I want to see her let go and, let someone else take care of her for a change. She works so hard. I want to show her what a good woman she is. I want to show her how much I love her.”

N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs):

“Threesomes, anal and, I’m pretty sure this is everyone’s answer but, bodily fluids belong in the toilet.”

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc):

“Yes.”

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? Etc.):

“Both. Sometimes I want to draw it out and, let her feel every inch of me but, sometimes I want to fuck so hard we are both sore the next day. It’s all amazing either way.”

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.):

“I love quickies. They are great in the afternoon when she and I have things to do but, we still want each other. They would get old after a while though so, we usually do both. It’s very rare that we just have a quickie and, nothing else but, sometimes it happens. Ever since we moved to Greece, we try to always make time for each other but, we both get busy from time to time.”

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.):

“I’m game to experiment a little bit but, Y/N and I have been together awhile. We’ve tried a few different things but, sex with her is so amazing, I don’t feel the need to experiment that much anymore.”

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last…):

“I can last forever if I need to. Like I said, my orgasm is an easy thing to obtain with a woman like Y/N so, my focus is making sure she’s feeling it too. I can go for multiple rounds too, I mean it’s hard not to. Have you seen her? We have sex all night sometimes. I hope she finishes her conference call soon, I’m really starting to miss her…”

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?):

“Y/N owns a very tasteful collection of dildos made out of rose quartz and jade. I use them on her sometimes between rounds but, I don’t know how often she uses them beyond that. I don’t own any toys but, I do spend quite a bit of money on new lingerie for Y/N. She has an entire armoire for all of her outfits. Oh, we have gold handcuffs too. We take turns using them on each other.”

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease):

“Y/N has a really sensitive spot on her neck and, she’s really tender around her waist so, sometimes I come up beyond her and, brush my lips against her throat and, tickle her. She’s told me it turns her on immediately so, I like to play with her a little bit. We both tease each other a lot though, especially during phone meetings. One time, I was on a 4 way call with my investors and, she sucked my dick through the entire thing. I thought I was gonna have a heart attack but, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t cum a little harder that time. Maybe that’s another kink of mine…”

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make):

“We live on a private piece of land so; we can be as loud as we want. I’m only loud when things are getting intense but, even still I’m not screaming at the top of my lungs. She isn’t crazy loud either but, I do try my hardest to get her to scream my name every now and again. Just for fun.”

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice):

“Y/N and I are in the process of buying an island in the Caribbean and, sometimes I get turned on when she talks about how much money we both have. I’m sorry, I know it’s a dick move but, it’s the truth. I donate millions to charity every year, I swear.”

X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words):

“I’m like 7 inches I think? When I’m hard it’s probably like 8 or 9. I’m not sharing any more than that ha.”

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?):

“Pretty high. Unless I’m really sick or really busy.”

Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards):

“If we’ve been going for multiple rounds, I’m pretty exhausted by the end of it but, I don’t just fall asleep. I don’t want to leave the bed afterwards though. I just want to cuddle with Y/N until we both pass out. If it’s during the day and, we’ve only gone once or twice, I’m not tired at all.”

“Aqua wanted me to dedicate this to @gldnrecs​ and, @bulletproofbirdy​. She says you guys are the best and, apparently you have a sweet spot for me. So, I guess I’ll dedicate this to you too ha. I hope you liked it.”

[mcl-pauly]

What are your takes and feelings about each Vampire and Eloise so far Pauly ? Sorry is someone asked this already :3

Oh I’ve never shared my opinions about ML in details before haven’t I?

I like Eloise! I find her hilarious and I like that she stands up for herself. Most of her reactions makes sense to me from what I can remember right now, the most annoying thing about her that I can think of is when she’s being jealous of another female character, because it doesn’t feel nice to play a character that’s insecure, but so far this is the only thing that bothers me about her character. And I actually like the way she’s dressed lolol wish they had kept her hair black though.

Vladimir was at the bottom of my ranking when the game was released... and he stayed there once I finished his route. I got sick of his mood swings by chapter 5 I think? He has his cute moments but him and Eloise are always arguing in his route. She is also always the one making efforts to make him come out of his shell, then 10 seconds later he’d become cold again.. it was just tiring. His neutral ending actually kind of redeemed him for me (not that I wanted him to die lol) because... I... like tragic characters I guess? I dunno, it kinda made me wanna go back to try and understand his character a bit more, at a moment where I was just sick of him. I wish they had focused on his depression more.

I wanted to drop Beliath’s route when I finished his first chapter. I was uncomfortable (I swear, who was it at Beemoov who decided the Crush would assault Eloise in the first chapter) and I had to spoil myself (which I hadn’t planned on doing when I started the game) up to chapter 3 to motivate myself to continue. And it was the BEST DECISION EVER. By the end of chapter 5, Beliath became my fav vampire. The Don Juan act can be off-putting in the beginning but I SWEAR it gets 100% better the more you progress into his route. His major default is that he’s a bit secretive but once his secret his revealed, it’s just... amazing. He’s so nice and playful, he’s respectful of Eloise and considers her as his equal. It’s the only route so far where the Crush acknowledges that the Chalice bond sucks (when on the other hand, Vladimir says that he “owns” Eloise up until chapter 9)... He’s just really good. I love him. And he’s also so nice when you’re not on his route. When Beliath says that he’s the best choice... maybe you should trust him.

When they revealed Ivan’s portrait back when the game was in development I thought he would be one of my fav... but when the game actually came out... well... let’s say that he wasn’t one. It’s not even because of the fact that he’s responsible for Eloise’s death... I don’t know, I guess the chemicals in my brain changed by the time the game came out lol. Anyway, he was kinda in the middle in my ranking, but he dropped hard once I started his route. He has his cute moments just like Vladimir, but he is... really bad-tempered. His relationship with Eloise is not healthy (they argue a lot too) and maybe it’ll get better but we’re already at chapter 6 and I don’t see any signs of the plot actually addressing the problems they had in the first chapters. I don’t like this weird dead lover trope they’re using for his route, Eloise is always either blaming herself or Constance for Ivan’s behavior and it’s just URGH girl, drop him and go get dicked down by Beliath already would you now. I’m actually enjoying his character more if I just ignore the romance parts (yeah, I’m invested in the Constance-Loic-Ivan drama, sue me).

I don’t really have much to say about Aaron right now. He’s in the middle in my ranking and I actually got more interested in his character after the game came out. He’s been nice so far and he can be really playful I think. I hope his bluntness will help us avoid spending entire chapters on secrets and stuff. Oh and I hope his route will give us lotssss of lore, considering Aaron is the oldest vampire in the manor.

Raphael is really nice and kind. Unfortunately, I have this very specific brain rot that makes me unable to like decent fictional men. Bottom of my ranking you go. It doesn’t mean that I’m not interested in his character though, I actually find it hilarious that he’ll gladly answer Eloise if she asks him about personal infos on the other vampires, but flatly refuse to say anything about himself if Eloise dares to ask. What are you so mysterious for, Jester boy. If ur kindness was genuine you wouldn’t be hiding things from me, Jester boy. Maybe if I bully him enough, I’ll love him by the time his route is released.

Ethan is an asshole. Unfortunately, I have this very specific brain rot that makes me like fictional bad boyz. It’s noticeable that he cares despite the layers and layers of snarks and I think that’s sweet. Now, I adore him in Beliath’s route, but I despise him in Ivan’s. I hate the way he’s behaving in it or the way he’s talking to Eloise, it just goes too far! In Bel’s route, he’s provocative but playful but in Ivan’s he’s straight up unsufferable. On another note, he’s also a character that will flatly refuse to say anything about himself if Eloise dares to ask so I can’t wait to learn more about his past.

[rowanartist]

Fan fiction quotes 2019:

"with great foods, came great emotional baggage"[X]extra funny since I just saw Into the Spiderverse

"Just get together every couple of weeks, without Stark, and you guys can pass Steve around like a bong."[ch2]whaat? And chapter three is a dirty parody - worth a read for the humor of it

"he just hopes Tony has the sense God gave concussed baby sheep "[X]interesting phrase

"“Science,” Jane says, drawing his face to hers, “Does not require pants "[X]fun series of short fics

"Never something so hot; not like a flame is hot, but the strength of something bathed in summer sun. "[X]interesting view on attraction

"(He'd been sketching when he thought that through; now there's a page that has a little cartoon of himself, ducking, with the caption "the spoons are attacking!" although he'd ended up finishing his latte before he actually drew any flying spoons.) "[X]Steve upon learning about spoon theory

"Can you think of anything that symbolizes the eighties better than David Bowie’s crotch in tights? "[X]giggle out loud! "You drink once if someone whines, if Sarah says something isn’t fair, or if we get a shot of Bowie’s crotch. "[Same]comment

"“Like you’re going to vibrate out of your skin?” Natasha finished for him, understanding. Sometimes, after what they’d been through, it was hard just to be in your body. Easier to dissociate, to let whatever was going to happen happen while the part of you that was you floated far away. Natasha had been there before, and she knew James went there sometimes. "[X]ponder?

"They’re each wrapped up in their own blanket burrito, lying side by side in the dark, sharing one pillow. "[X]dual blanket burritos

"For most of his life he learned the safest option was to repress his emotional responses as much as possible, and over time he forgot how to access them when he actually needed to. "[X]relatable to a small degree

"Nothing too special but I’m pretty much Michael Bay’s wet dream "[X]to describe bakugo lol

"Most people," Midoriya continued gently, "don't need to be told they have a crush by the person that they have the crush on."[X]my boyfriend can relate to Midoriya here...

"about how if Midoriya could go this long talking without breathing in any new air, he'd probably be really good at kissing. "[same]lol

"God, fuck off. You look so freshly screwed that it hurts me. "[X]Bakugo ;p

"After all, shodō is one of Shouto’s hobbies. For Midoriya’s birthday last year, he made a beautiful poster of UA’s motto that is now displayed prominently above Midoriya’s bed. "[X]draw? If i can? "Please don’t use your All Might voice when we’re making plans to have sex. "[Same]lol

"He’d known for a while that his boyfriend internalizes, that he still struggles with a lot of insecurities and periodic depression from his years around his dad "[X]comment

"Shouto you’re worth more than anything. And you deserve happiness. I don’t care what micro-dick has said to you in the past or any shit he spews out of the mouth that’s somehow more obnoxious than Present Mic "[same]dam it Endeavor :/ "You’re a dork,” Izuku mutters in a break for breath. “Your dork,” Shouto says quietly "[Same]awww

"But if you ever forget your phone again I will use you as an advertisement balloon for a day, and that’s a promise."[X]lol

"First of all, I challenge you to find a dress that can fit that shoulders to waist ratio.” Shouto replied, matter-of-factly, pointing at Izuku’s entire body. “Secondly, you absolutely lack the manners to be a princess, you brute.” "[X]part of a series

"Another young woman that couldn’t be older than Shouto and Izuku looked up at the call. She had a round face and long, brown hair with little orange streaks every now and then collected in a braid. The red rimmed glasses she wore made her yellow eyes look bigger, behind the lenses. She lit up, when she saw them. "[X]need to try to draw

"You’d die of embarrassment— Either that, or Aizawa-sensei would kill you. And I kind of like you alive, thank you very much.” "[same]LOL

" is standing there in grey sweats and a loose Totoro hoodie he got him on one of their first dates "[X]draw

"It definitely didn’t help that Izuku stretched lazily, something akin to a cat just waking up from a nap, one of his legs stretching against the wall as the opposite arm reached towards Shouto with fingers spread wide-open. "[X]DRAW!

"What? They’re really short, all my boxers showed and it was weird. "[X]...

"Just because he isn’t as obvious about it, doesn’t mean Shouto isn’t beyond anxious too. "[X]comment

"He doesn’t treat Shouto like he is fragile, but he treats him like he is precious, and that is an important distinction"...."Something precious, however, doesn’t necessarily break easy, but it warrants the utmost care. It’s meant to be cherished. "[X]relationship advice

"One of the national dishes has no meat in it, but it’s the hottest thing I’ve ever tasted. I thought we were all going to die and T’Challa was going to succeed in eliminating us. Then I heard him yelling at the chef, saying none of us were used to Wakandan peppers.” "[X]https://archiveofourown.org/works/8688724/chapters/19918951#workskin

"All Tony was supposed to do was fix the alternator. Instead he built me a Jeep that tells me I have to initiate a proper launch sequence before I’m able to turn it on and drive.” "[Same]comment

"I’m sorry,” Midoriya retracts his hand, and Todoroki misses it instantly. “It’s not something I can fix, and that makes me sad. You don’t deserve to hear the things he tells you.” "[X]reread comment. Relatable to a degree personally

"But he has to admit the Docs greener side is awfully useful in a brawl; and his less menacing side has a wicked sense of humor, not to mention awfully good with a med kit. "[X]i like Bruce having a sense of humor

"That's what friends are for anyway, having your back when times are tough, and amusement for when times are peaceful. "[X]amusing

"Bucky didn't think he was being rude, but if Captain America said so, it must be true. "[Same]comment

"Steve’s always been a fan of cuddles, even if he doesn’t like to admit it, admit how much he needs that physical contact. "[X]I'm a fan of this concept

"Which in Steve-speak means that you’re feeling guilty as all hell over things you can’t control – again, mind you – and you can’t rest because you can’t shut your brain up.” "[Same]relate "There’s power in this act, Darcy thinks as she sucks and licks up and down his length. To be able to take someone apart with just her mouth and a few touches of her hands. Reduce them to tears or send them flying upwards into the heavens. And the knowledge that she wants to do this for him – for them – makes the feeling all the more potent. She doesn’t have to do this, but it’s her choice, and she wants to give this to them. "[Same]ponder more

"She may not come from it, but the closeness and the intimacy is far more important than any orgasm. "[X]remember

"He knows better, knows that Bakugou’s punches of greeting and movie nights at Yaoyorozu’s house with Mina, Hagakure, and Tsu, and that baking with Izuku are all love. That’s love, not the villain sat behind the desk. "[X]dark fic, author warns in notes. But this line is sweet

"Natasha Romanoff is a world-class spy, yes. But she’s also a potato chip thief who makes dumb jokes and uses emoticons (she had been very adamant that Steve learn the difference between emoticons and emojis), and Steve adores her for it. "[ch5]she's human

"Bucky flopped onto it rolling around like a dog on the soft surface, Natasha quietly responding by taking out her phone and videoing his nonsense. "[ch2]Mr. Kate style rug cuddle but solo

"“First of all, just because someone is good looking does not mean I should have sex with them. There are attractive serial killers Nat, do you want me to get murdered? Second of all, I don’t know him. Third of all, he’s not looking at me like I’m chicken wings, also Clint, seriously? Chicken wings?” "[same]lol, but I'm with you Bucky

"Even in just plain sweatpants, the American icon without a shirt was an image that would have anyone seeing stars and stripes, regardless of sexual orientation. "[X]:)

"Agent Bishop was hit with a biological weapon today that has a ninety-two per cent chance of ending in fatality within three days unless proper care is administered to disperse the chemical compound through natural methods. Meaning, in the case of humans, sexual release. As in, orgasming."[X]a legalese description of "sex pollen" ...

"Do the horizontal contra dance, yes," Darcy answered. "Well kind of, I mean there's only three of us and a contra dance is four to a group, but tango is just for two and I had to think of something fast. Come on, Stevie, this isn't the first time we've hooked up. "[X]lol

"He wanted something just for him again, even though he felt like a selfish asshole for even thinking it. So he would do whatever he could to chase after that feeling. Even if it was stupid. Even if it was silly. "[ch2]advice, remember "Tony must never read these, Steve thought. Bucky’s arm would never be safe. "[ch3]Steve Discovers FanFiction "Steve stayed focused on the screen, sticking out his tongue a little while he concentrated. It was unfairly adorable. "[ch4]Jarvis knows how to motivate Steve: a Bucky themed typing game "Good things would happen. Funny, clever jokes would be told. Sexy adventures were always available, no matter what was happening in the real world. "[X]relatable "There was even a page of ‘Bucky Approved Sex Words and Phrases’. The name alone never failed to make Steve smile "[ch7]lol "He wasn’t really writing this stuff for the money anyways; mostly he just wanted to see that other people liked and enjoyed what he was doing. "[Same]relatable: my redbubble rowan-artist

"Darcy’s eyes widened. “Oh god, I just imagined you naked, dusted in gold, on a satin-sheeted bed. My mind is a dangerous place.” “Hey, there’s always Halloween.” "[ch6]you being Steve

"Jane was rapidly nearing the angry-bear stage of sleep deprivation (there were seven levels on the Dr. Jane Foster Sleep Deprivation chart; angry bear was number five, between 'genius-level insane productivity' and 'sugar high five-year old'), "[X]also Dean Fury ... "Then you come to me, we'll kill a bottle of Jameson and make Thor carry our drunk asses home while we sing Les Mis horribly off-key," "[same]amusing

"This is why you should always read end-user agreements on friendships. "[X]not the fic but the start notes, lol. Also, Maria's entry is adorable, and Pepper potts!! "(“So what you’re telling me is you spent a week building a glorified roomba,” Rhodey says the first time he sees it, and Tony lets out an undignified huff and makes JUNK-E destroy and clean a grand piano.) "[Same]hahha

"And it’s better to be an asset, which at least sounds like something you value, than a glorified action figure. "[ch3]comment "Steve’s friendship is stronger than even Steve’s shield, and protects them both just as much "[Same ch9]awww

"Bucky actually is, but she knows well enough not to ask. Instead, she has started braiding flowers into Natasha's hair while the other girl of the group is busy making a flower crown for Thor. This is what it must be like to have real friends, Bucky thinks, lounging in his camping chair, trying to eat with one hand while Steve is holding his arm, drawing on the inside of his forearm with a black pen. "[ch2]flower crowns "I heard a lot of things I kind of projected on myself. It's probably stupid, but… it's always crazy to hear things that apply to oneself somehow." "It's the magic of music. Sam once told me about the Mr. Brightside effect–" "[ch4]yes "Bruce is on his own so much that he probably doesn't even notice that he has friends "[ch5]relatable, high school me

"The most beautiful thing however was the wall right next to the bed-- while all the other walls were the same off-white color, this one sported stripes of different colors down. Blue, red, green, purple, black, another shade of lighter blue. In the middle of these stripes, the Avenger signs were painted by a meticulous hand; Cap’s shield, Tony’s arc reactor, Mew Mew, and so on-- Darcy didn’t notice she was crying into Mara started wailing in solidarity "[ch1]draw?

"He knows it, like Steve and Bucky know that Tony needs praises and affection, not commands. "[ch8]...

"She thanked Sif (a habit she had started lately, thanking the Asgardian warrior instead of some non-present God, because really, if there was a god she wanted to follow, it would totally be Sif) "[X]nice Darcy "Even if she wasn’t an Avenger per say, she got to be on the team, both super and nonsuper alike. "[ch2]awww

"Elizabeth is going to make coffee happen, and in Darcy’s eyes that makes her a goddess. "[X]comment "By the end, Steve had been right in the thick of it, using a frypan as a shield and hurling pasta like nobody’s business. "[same]comment "Agent Hill’s bad ass levels are through the roof, but put her in front of a powerpoint and the result is coma-inducing. "[Ch3]lol "JARVIS, my man, I need some fat beats up in here. Help a sister out?” "[ch3]comment

"She knew now that it was almost certainly to do with her personal level of comfort and how hard both Steve and Barnes had worked to make her feel good. "[middle chapter]comment

"A video clip of the Asgardian scientist Tadeas and Neil Degrasse Tyson singing a scientific ballad of their own composition was one of the most viewed Youtube videos of all time "[X]lol "He grabbed [a muffin] and shoved it into his mouth, belatedly peeling the paper off. "[Same]haha! :D "Darcy put a box of Sour Patch Kids on top, “Those are for Heimdall.” "[X]comment "“No. Damnit, Darcy. You’re stubborn. Of course you’re stubborn! Jesus Christ, I can’t even imagine what it must like to be in the same room as the two of you.” "[X]best friend sass "But Clint is a human with a bow on a team of superheroes. "[X]Darcy's favorite avenger and why Ch4 music note "Apparently Thor is back on Earth. He showed up in New York right after we left and basically deafened all of Brooklyn with his displeased shouting about his missing Shield Sister. So now everyone knows I’m gone and my disappearance is trending on Twitter as #MissingAsgardianPrincess. How is this my life?! I can’t even with this shit.” "[X]mild spoiler? HAHAHA "Try having a conversation with one of them [asgardians]-- 4 to 1 odds it turns into some sort of ballad recitation. "[X]...

"The next day, Izuku Midoriya delivered his eleven page elaborate essay on how ordering sex toys inspired him to be more honest with himself and his boyfriend about what he wanted in life and in bed. "[X]lol

"“Fire for stop, ice for slow, and smash for go.” "[X]comment

[helena-studyblr]

a post no one asked for!

hello so i reblogged a questionnaire a lil bit ago and i’m going to answer them now because...why not

1. how old are you?

im 18!

2.  are you in high school or college(university)?

college

3. what year or grade are you in high school or (university)? 

im a freshman in college

4. what is your school’s grading system look like? do you like it? what problems do you have with it, if any? 

so my university has a standard letter grade system for most classes and pass/fail for some courses that don’t really need a grade. i do like it because it’s what i’m used to, however, a lot of times having a letter grade system can be more stressful because it makes you feel like anything but some kind of A is mediocre and not good enough, when in reality, a 75% or above is better than average.

5. if you are in high school do you plan on going to university or college? if you are in college do you plan on finishing and if you do, do you plan on continuing on to other graduate or professional schools? 

i plan on going to veterinary school after i finish my undergraduate degree! if i end up changing my major to my second choice(music education is my second choice), then of course I won’t be going to vet school.

6. if you are high school what do you plan to study in college, if you plan to go. if not, what do you plan on doing after high school? if you are in college what is your major? do you plan on changing it? 

i am currently studying biochemistry and molecular biology and i have a minor in music! i dont plan on changing it at this point, but if i do, i’d change it to music education.

7. why are you picking or why did you pick what you are currently studying? 

i want to go to vet school, and biochemistry has almost all the requirements for vet school admissions. also, i find it interesting

8. do you go/plan to go to community college, technical college, or a four-year institution? how did you make your decision, or how do you plan to?

i am at a 4 year university, and i went here because it fits what i want to do

9. what factors did you consider when picking a college, or what factors do you plan on considering? 

the college I chose is in my hometown, which is probably one of the deciding factors(i really wanted to be close to home). the campus is very pretty and small as well, and i really wanted to go to a small college. i could have potentially gone to The Ohio State University because i’m about 20 minutes away, but the camous is so big and i know i would have hated it. the school also has a good music program, soi can continue playing even though it isn’t my major

10. what is your favorite pencil?

i love my muji mechanical pencil and also the papermate clearpoint!

11. what are your top three favorite pens?

pilot juice, muji gel pens, and sharpie pens

12. do you prefer wide-ruled paper, college-ruled, dot-grid, or graph paper? 

college ruled is my favorite for class notes, graph paper for revised/nice notes/math work, and blank for planning generally

13. do you use different types of paper for different courses or classes?

i use college ruled for almost everything except math homework(i use graph)

14. do you use a backpack/bag for school or college and what kind is it? why did you choose it? price, quality, function, design? 

i use a backpack, i have no idea what brand it is, but its the perfect size for everything i need to take to classes and its also really pretty(it has a black background with flowers on it)

15. what is your favorite outfit to go to class in and why? 

i generally wear leggings and a sweatshirt/sweater just because they’re comfy and also look cute! if its warm enough, i wear flip flops but if not, i wear my vans or converse.

16. what is something you always have to have in your backpack or bag?

usually my laptop and pencil case

17. what is your least favorite subject and why? 

math!!!!!!! will always hate. guarunteed. 

18. have you ever gone to tutoring, if so, how has it helped your academic endeavors? 

i have not

19. have you ever seeked academic counseling, if so has it helped you?

i haven’t

20. has your mental health ever suffered during high school or college, and what did you do to cope? 

holy shit yes. i suffer from depression and anxiety(depression for almost a year and anxiety for 4 years). i could make a whole post about this but in general, i make sure i give myself time to relax. it can be so so hard to take care of yourself when you suffer with things like this, so even if you can barely get out of bed, try to make time to do things that make you happy. for me, it’s drawing, netflix, and video games.

21. do you like to listen to music when studying? if so, what genre, if you have a playlist share it! 

i do listen to music! i just listen to music i like, which is rock/pop punk/alt rock/etc. (here’s one of my playlists!: https://open.spotify.com/user/helenakitten14/playlist/4R6ZGIlz8K5UDEk80cVfV5?si=cXK0z3HTRUKCQSKx9F8tNA )

22. do you prefer to study at a library or at home at your desk?

depends what i’m working on and how much i have to do. if i feel like i have to be totally focused, i go to the library, but if i have some time to take breaks and get distracted, i just stay in my room. I also hate going to the library on my own, so sometimes i stay in my room anyway if no one can come with.

23. what are your top three items you keep on your desk?

my lamp, my laptop, and whatever drink i’m drinking while working( i always have a drink so i avoid snacking lol)

24. do you feel as if you are more productive during the day or in the evenings? 

evenings for sure

25. if you exercise, do you feel as if it affects your productivity and if so how? 

i do marching band which is usually my exercise, but i don’t work out. working out just exhausts me and i don’t have energy to begin with(ye ye depression)

26. do you participate in any extracurriculars and if so how do you manage your time?

marching band and wind ensemble! i’m also joing KKPsi, which is an honorary fraternity for music service! i am not great at time management, however, i plan out everything to hold myself accountable

27. do you use a bullet journal, a planner, or to-do lists? do you use a combination of all three? 

i use a combo of all three! i’ve been bullet journalling a lot recently, but i also use a planner during busy weeks when i dont have time to make a spread and i make to do lists for weekends

28. do you have a note-taking style?

nothing specific

29. do you have a color-coding system?

i like to make every different topic/spread a different color. also, when i make notes, i like to highlight vocab words.

30. what do you believe is one of the most overrated studyblr trends? 

100 days of productivity. its impossible to be completely productive for 100 days straight. shit happens, and i understand the purpose of the 100 days challenge, but i think it also takes a toll on you mentally.

31. what are your career goals, how do you plan to reach them? 

i want to be a veterinarian or someone that works with animals somehow. i hope to go to vet school and then have my own practice or join another practice.

32. do you use a laptop? if so which model? how does it perform, would you reccomend it? if not, what model would you like?

i use a macbook air! it is nice because it is easy to transport, but occasionally the functionality can be questionable(storage space is always my issue). i do reccommend it, though. if i could get a new laptop, i’d probably get a macbook pro. 

33. do you use a tablet? if so which model? how does it perform, would you reccomend it? if not, what model are you interested in?

i don’t, but i think having an iPad would be nice!

34. if you post pictures to tumblr, do you use a camera or your phone, if so, what is the model? 

i use my iPhone 6s

35. 0.5, 0.7, or 0.9 pencil lead? 

usually .5 or .7

36. 0.5, 0.7, 0.9, or 1.0 pens? 

.5

37. how many hours a day do you spend studying? are your hours consistent daily or do they differ depending on assignments and exams? 

i tend to study for a majority of the day most days, but it always differs. i have no set timetable

38. how many courses do you take? what are they?

so i am in 8 courses right now. Biology, Gen Chem, Bio Lab, Gen Chem Lab, Calculus I, The History of rock n roll, Wind Ensemble, and Marching band.

39. how long until you graduate? in credit hours, semesters, or years?

i still have 3.5 years left of college, which is 7 semesters

40. how did you find the studyblr community?

honestly i dont remember, it was so long ago

41. how did the studyblr community impact you? 

i was in a big funk my sophomore year of high school. i had no motivation, i hated learning, i hated everything tbh. but them i found this community and it inspired me and showed me that studying can be fun and pretty while also being a learning experience!

42. do you go to school in the day or night?

day!

43. what is something you are too afraid to be involved in at school or college and why? 

 in high school, i was very afraid to get involved with a lot of things, such as theatre and some other clubs just because of anxiety.

44. do you type or write your notes? 

i write them mostly, but my biology professor talks really fast so i usually type notes for his class

45. what do you do on your breaks from studying? 

netflix, eat, play video games, probably other stuff i’m forgetting

46. how do you study for math exams?

honestly i just look through lecture notes and hope for the best. occasionally i do practice problems but not often

47. do you rewrite your notes at home after class, or do you just use the ones you have already? why? 

i rewrite them because it helps me memorize things

48. what are your least favorite courses and why?

math of any kind! i also hate biology right now just because my professor sucks

49. are you in a relationship while in school? if so, why? if not, why? 

i recently got out of a relationship, but im open to being in a relationship with someone

50. if you are in a relationship, how do you manage that along with your studies? 

it was very hard to manage it honestly, but i did what i could to make time, even if it was only just having a meal together. 

51. if you aren’t in a relationship, do you plan on entering one while still in school? explain. 

if i find the right person, yea! being in relationsips is great, especially because you have a companion to help you when you’re struggling

52. do you worry about GPA, if so why, if not why?

oh my god yes i do. i have to have a certain GPA to keep my scholarship money and to stay in the honors program, plus i just want to do well.

53. did you or do you plan to take the SAT or ACT, how did you feel about the exams? did you study for them? have you taken it more than once?

i did take both the SAT and ACT. i did well on each, but the SAT was a lot harder for me. I got a 1220(i think) on the SAT and a 31 on the ACT. i took the ACT twice

54. did you or do you plan to take the GRE, LSAT, PCAT, MCAT, DAT (or any other grad exam)? how did it go? how are you or how did you study for it? have you taken it more than once? 

i’m going to take the MCAT

55. do you or did you take AP classes is high school? how do you feel about how they prepared you for college? did your school require you to take the exam?

yes i did take AP classes! i took 9 total, and they overall did help me learn how to manage time better as well as how to study. we weren’t required to take the exams, but i always did

56. do you or did you do the IB program in high school? can you explain it more for those who are unfamiliar with it? 

i did not, however the IB program is basically an intensive high school honors program that is very writing intensive. its like AP on steroids

57. do your or did you take dual-enrollment classes? how did you feel about how they prepared you for college? 

i didnt but i wish i did!

58. how many colleges or universities did you apply to or not? and why?

i applied to 5 colleges. i already knew where i wanted to go, but i wanted to be safe just in case i didnt get in, so i applied to the 5 i was most interested in. I also wanted to see if any other schools would give me a lot more financial aid.

59. how did you make friends in college or high school?

through band! in both situations

60. has your friend group stayed the same throughout your time in school?

yes actually! i’m still very close to all my high school friends and a few of them go to my college as well. of course i’ve met new people but i. also still have the same friends

61. how does your friend group influence your goals?

we all have our own goals, we just encourage each other and act as an outlet for stress

62. what is your favorite thing to learn about in your free time?

music and current events

63. what is your favorite study snack?

i like to eat carrots/pretzels with hummus or oreos

64. what is one thing that can completely make you stop studying? 

being depressed or tired

65. are there days during the week that you keep completely free from studying? 

yes. wednesdays are my hell days class-wise, so i refrain from doing work on those days after my classes are over

66. what do you do when you have to hustle? where do you go? 

i dont know what this means

67. are your parents or family supportive of your goals? if so how does this affect you? 

they’re very supportive!

68. do you like to read? and do you ever have any free time to do so?

i really love reading but i never have time

69. do you wear a watch? why or why not? what kind? 

nope, they annoy me

70. do you like to drink coffee or tea when working? decaf? what do you add to it? why do you like to drink coffee or tea? 

coffee with full caffeine! i always add creamer, and i drink it because it wakes me up 

71.��how do you organize your notes after your finish writing them? 

i have notebooks for every class and binders as well

72. what do you do with your notes after the year or semester is over?

i either recycle them if they won’t be necessary anymore or i keep them in my closet

73. what are your favorite studyblrs?

studyign, emmestudies, and a lot more that i can’t think of

74. what are your favorite studygrams?

same as above except add on focusign and revisign!

75. what is the biggest impact a teacher or a professor has had on you?

my band director was very impactful on my life just because he was my teacher for 5 years, so we had a good relationship

76. what is the biggest impact that a class has had on you?

my film and lit class had a massive impact on me. it made me think in very different ways

77. who is your inspiration and who do you look up to academic wise and career wise? 

my dad inspires me a lot because he worked so hard to find a career he loved and kept going until he got there. he’s also endlessly supportive of me

thats it! this took me so long hahaha anyway. thanks for reading!

[ireneelsewhere]

Core course week: Gothenburg, Sweden

After three weeks of settling into a normal routine in Stockholm, we all went off on our first study tour. My core course, Forensic Psychology, took a 3-hour train to Gothenburg, Sweden, but for our long tour week in October we’ll be going to Scotland. The point of core course week and the long study tour is to immerse yourself in the subject material that you’re presumably most interested in. It’s not only a chance to place classroom material into real-world context by going on field studies around Europe but also an opportunity for the class to bond over shared cultural experiences as we all travel together. 

In Gothenburg, we stayed at the Spoton Hostel (I shared a room with 5 other girls, i’ve been told i gently snore and i’m sorry ok). Our main mode of transportation was their infamous tram system, which run on cable lines and honestly kinda look like they don’t really value human life? because they literally just pummel down the streets with jerky brake systems (my host dad told me that some people are run over by the trams each year because they weren’t paying attention or they slipped and fell at an unfortunate time.......thankfully I learned this after I got back from Gothenburg). 

DIS provided two meals a day - we ate breakfast at the hostel and either ate a group lunch or dinner. Not sure how the administration breaks down parts of our tuition but DIS definitely did not skimp out on our food. I thought we were going to survive off of PB&J’s and Chips Ahoy (bc that’s how school trips like to go, i’m looking at u @vanderbilt asb) but we actually ate at the fanciest places, with at least two courses and sometimes wine/beer. Truly amazing, so thank you DIS from the bottom of my stomach.  (I registered as a vegetarian so all meal descriptions will only be relevant to the veggies. Meat eaters got a lot of lamb.)

Long post ahead but lol honestly all my posts are long. 

Day 1: Monday, 9/10/2018

Woke up at 5am to catch the 6:40am train. This day was actually my best friend’s birthday and I was lowkey sad I couldn’t be with her (if you know us in real life, then you know we’re annoyingly inseparable), but days like this had me extra thankful for inventions like snapchat and facetime that make it easier to stay connected even when you’re thousands of miles apart. (I actually got to watch her open my present while I was on the train to Gothenburg bc her boyfriend facetime’d me! Hehe ily ivy)

Our first field study of the week was to Halvvägshuset Göteborg (Halfway House), a non-profit organization designed as the last stop in an inmate’s rehabilitation process right before they finish their sentence. They provide resources to help update individuals who’ve been in prison for a long time on the modern ways of living, such as using smartphones or paying your bills online. Individuals who enter the halfway house get their own bedroom, the freedom for family members to visit, and access to telephones and computers, in exchange for holding down a job and earning income. They get the opportunity to settle into a normal routine with (some) freedom and to start feeling like a person again rather than as inmate #23420.  The lady who spoke to us was the most genuine, kind-hearted woman, and emphasized that in the end we’re all human beings and sometimes people commit crimes due to their situation rather than due to some inherent evil that we like to use as a convenient explanation for crime (see strain theory). She also said that it’s less costly for society to help reintegrate these individuals (assuming they are willing/able/ready) rather than to further isolate them and prevent them from contributing to society. Overall, I think we all left the halfway house understanding the powers of empathy and rehabilitation a bit more. 

Later, we went to the Boule Bar and learned how to play Pétanque. It’s a European sport where you throw boules (balls), aiming at a target jack. 

(The target jack is the tiny orange sphere in the right pic. As u can see, most of our aims sucked.)

(Dinner, at the same place @BouleBar, included an incredible round of salad starters; the vegetarian entree was falafels with large couscous. Honestly this was probably my favorite meal out of the ones DIS provided!)

Day 2: Tuesday, 9/11/2018

Tuesday was busy because we had field studies in both the morning and afternoon. We went to CLIP, a research unit for Criminal, Legislative, and Investigative Psychology, and learned about the current research on deception detection, eyewitness memory, and child sexual abuse from PhD candidates at the Göteborg Universitet. Later, we went to the ADA Women’s Shelter, a feminist non-profit organization that provides support to abused women and their children. We weren’t able to see the actual shelter because the location is kept secret from the public, to protect the women inside, but we were able to listen to a presentation from probably the most bad ass woman I’ve ever seen in real life. Think “the girl with the dragon tattoo” with a #nastywoman attitude. Her passion for her work was contagious - I left feeling inspired and very motivated to combat the patriarchal society that we live in. 

(Dinner @SpisaMatbar. Vegetarian entree was salad with oyster mushrooms. Dessert was chocolate creme brulee. So good, ugh.)

(Cheers to core course week. School-sponsored wine is the best kinda wine.)

Day 3: Wednesday, 9/12/2018

Our last day in Gothenburg was reserved for fun activities - no more field studies in Gothenburg! We went to Prison Island, which honestly WAS SO FUN i can’t believe no one has capitalized on this recreational business opportunity in the states yet. It’s kinda like an escape room, except there were many rooms and each room had a challenge that you had to solve based on a combination of wit, technical skill, and physical ability. The place was more high tech than it looked, filled with motion detectors and tiny lasers that, for example, make sure you’re not touching the floor when you’re not supposed to. The challenges required lots of teamwork, as perhaps one person needed to be in a certain part of the room shouting out instructions that only they can see to another person who’s in a pitch black tunnel trying to find hidden buttons to press. 

My team included Maya, Megan, and Meiling (our teacher) and we ended up being the winning team! Meiling later told our class that because she already played the game in previous semesters, she purposefully tried to be dead weight and not help us for the challenges... but there was a room full of bouncy balls that we all hesitated to dive into exCEPT for her. Meiling dove in headfirst to retrieve clues. So honestly, she was our MVP.  

(Maya & Megan with a maze that you have to physically tilt.)

(Maya in the Shark Room. Look at her balancing on that teeny tiny rock!! trying to press a button at the top! Our rock climbing hero!)

Prison Island has been one of my favorite activities done in Sweden so far, and I’ll probably try to visit the location in Stockholm as well. Highly highly recommend!

(Lunch at the cutest French restaurant: Brasserie Lipp. I scratched out the guys’ faces because Europe is serious about their data privacy and i don’t wanna get sued ok)

(It was baked zucchini. @BrasserieLipp)

Day 4: Thursday, 9/13/2018

Back in Stockholm. We went to the Center for Psychiatric Research at the Karolinska Institutet to learn about the role of psychologists in assessing the mental state of offenders. Our afternoon field study got cancelled, so for the rest of the day we debriefed everything we did, ending our week’s schedule a day early. Overall I think our class learned a lot and we all bonded with each other - which were exactly the goals of core course week :) 

Day 5: Friday, 9/14/2018

Since our class was the only one to get Friday off (haha suckas), some of us went to Grona Lund, the amusement park in Stockholm. It was the perfect end to core course week! Now, I just have to mentally prepare myself for six hours of sitting in a classroom on Monday again.....

Tack for coming on this journey with me. It’s been fun so far,

Irene 

[nageki-yuki-blog]

How I Learned Japanese

Since Anon asked how I learned, I decided to make a post about it in case anyone else was wondering or wanted to learn too~  This will sort of be a timeline of my journey, so I guess you could call it my Japanese journey, because that doesn’t sound weird at all. >w>   It ended up being longer than I expected so if you don’t want to read everything, just skip to the bottom and I’ll put a short version with all the main stuff that helped me learn if you are interested in learning too.  It’s under the cut~

 -Exactly five years ago, I knew absolutely no Japanese. I didn’t even know sayonara was a Japanese word to be honest until I heard them say it in an anime XD  To make a long story short, I got obsessed with anime when I was about 17, and that is around the time that I decided, maybe I should try learning the language.  It was almost exactly 5 years ago this month.

-I looked up websites about how to learn and they all said learn the alphabets first, so that’s what I did.  I made some charts of the kana and practiced with flash cards until I memorized them.  I then took some song lyrics in romaji and copied them down in both hiragana and katakana, trying not to look at the charts.  I think after about a month of practicing them, I decided to just move on and focus on the language.

-During that time, I also looked up and started watching some Japanese lesson videos on youtube ===> [Youtube Link Here] These were a great introduction to the language.  I had a notebook and I would write down the lessons like I was taking a class. LOL  I watched all the videos and memorized most of what I learned (there are probably way more videos on that channel now than there were back then).

-From that point I just started using a dictionary to learn words.  I would watch an episode of anime and write down words I heard, along with the possible translation from the subtitles.  Then I would look up all those words in the dictionary afterwards.  For example, there was an episode of Karneval where they saw smoke and Tsukumo said “kemuri?” and I read the translation of smoke so I wrote it down.  I looked it up in the dictionary afterwards to make sure it was right and then I would write all the new words I learned on another page that I would review later to memorize them all.  Although there were a ton of words I misheard or couldn’t find in the dictionary, this method helped me memorize a LOT of words.  I still remember the exact moments I first heard some words just like this example, which happened almost 5 years ago.  That is probably because hearing and seeing what’s going on in the anime, plus being able to read it in English, plus writing it down at the exact moment and reminding yourself of it later all helps it stick in your mind.

-I would review these lists of new words every morning and every night.  Studying in the morning helps you absorb it with a clear mind, and studying at night helps you memorize it because it will stay in your head all night.

-I did that and tried to memorize vocabulary lists for several months.  Another thing I did during this time was write down song lyrics in kana, and then write the meaning of each word underneath it.  This helped give me an idea of how Japanese grammar worked because I could visually see the set-up of each sentence along with the meanings.

-After those several months, I realized that I still couldn’t understand much because I didn’t really study much grammar, I only knew the meaning of nouns and some verbs, but didn’t know how to use them. I looked up Japanese grammar books online and found a free guide (or at least I think it was supposed to be free when I downloaded it, but now it looks like it’s for sale. You can still find the old version online if you look it up).  It is called the “Japanese Grammar Guide” by Tae Kim.  This guide actually helped me a lot so I need to mention it.  It took me about a year to learn everything that was in this guide.

-While I was learning from that guide, and it was about a year since I started trying to seriously learn the language, I reached a point where I still couldn’t understand pretty much anything in Japanese without a translation.  I got really upset and stopped learning for a week and wanted to give up because it was too confusing and too much work and I didn’t see any results.  But then I thought, all of this time I spent studying will be wasted if I stop now and I will regret it forever if I continue watching anime, so I HAVE to keep going.  So I forced myself to gain some motivation again and I kept going.

-After finishing the grammar guide, I decided I better learn some kanji too.  I only knew a few kanji at that point and hadn’t been that interested in learning to read Japanese, until I decided that I really wanted to be able to play otome games too.  I’m sure you’ve heard of “Remembering the Kanji” by James W. Heisig.  I found a copy of it online (although I’m sure this book isn’t supposed to be free XD) and started using it.  I would write down each kanji I learned along with the meanings and review them every day.  DEFINITELY get this book if you want to learn kanji, it really helps and there are still kanji I remember learning from it that I rarely even use, so it does work.   You shouldn’t need to use the second volume unless you really want to learn every single kanji, but many of them are rare so I never used the second one.

-There is also an app called “Kanji Stories” that gives stories for each kanji following that book, so this comes in handy when the book stops giving examples for you to use.  I used this app a LOT and still sometimes use it to refresh myself when I forget a kanji.  Although I downloaded it a long time ago on my old Iphone 4 which I pretty much just use as Japanese Dictionary/music player/camera at this point XD  So I’m not sure if it’s still available in the app store.

-I also downloaded another app called “JEDict Lite” which lets you look up kanji by writing them or by using radicals.  BUT you need to learn stroke order first otherwise it won’t work if you draw the kanji in the wrong order.  I still use this app all the time because I still have problems remembering all those darn kanji. XD  [Itunes Link Here]

-I should also mention that I use a Japanese dictionary app made by Bravolol.  [Website Link Here]

-All of these apps were free when I downloaded them, and it looks like they still are, but my phone is super old so I don’t know if they would still work on newer phones.

-So after about 3 years of studying and memorizing stuff, and just getting bored of doing the same thing, I started trying to use the language.  I started playing some visual novels and it was still very hard to read so I would measure how much time it took me to get through each chapter or section.  It started out as taking about 3 hours for each part but after a couple of weeks it would take only 15 minutes to read through the same amount of text.  It was the same thing when I first started listening to drama CDs.  I would have to use my dictionary almost constantly while listening to them and would even have to pause the CD in parts so I could look up words I didn’t know.  Now I still have to look up words once in a while but there are some CDs that I can understand completely without using my dictionary even once.  It is extremely important to jump in and just start listening or watching things without subtitles or translations, because that is what will really help you learn.  It may suck when you get to a part that you just can’t understand, because I know that happened to me a lot in the beginning, but you don’t have to fuss over it, just skip it for the moment and it might makes sense later.

-It’s important to also listen to non-anime/game stuff since normal Japanese doesn’t sound the same.  I listened to some radio shows like DGS and watched videos of live events.  I also got really into stage plays and musicals in the past year, which I had difficulty understanding at first too, but now I can understand them fine.

   Short Version:

-I made kana charts and flash cards, then practiced writing song lyrics in both hiragana and katakana.

-I watched some lessons on youtube ===> [Youtube Link Here]

-I used a dictionary to learn and memorize words I heard in anime, games, etc.

-I reviewed the new words I learned every morning and night.

-I studied the “Japanese Grammar Guide” by Tae Kim.

-I read “Remembering the Kanji” by James W. Heisig and used the “Kanji Stories” app with it. (not sure if this app is still available)

-I use the “JEDict Lite” app to look up kanji, but you need to know stroke order for it to work.  [Itunes Link Here]

-I use a Japanese dictionary app made by Bravolol. [Website Link Here]

-After about 3 years, I stopped studying and just started reading visual novels and listening to drama CDs.

  -So that has led me to the point I’m at right now.  My Japanese skills got better really fast after I started using the language and translating things myself.  I am always still learning and wouldn’t say that I am fluent, but I also didn’t expect to be able to understand it this well, so that’s perfectly fine with me.  Part of the reason I started doing these translations was because my reading and comprehension skills weren’t at the level that I wanted.  It takes another type of skill to translate, so even though I know what they are saying, it is still hard to put it into English, but I’m getting better at it.

-If anyone wants to learn Japanese and wants some tips, I would recommend studying the grammar, vocab, and kanji all at once, rather than how I did it.  My kanji skills are still lacking because I started studying it a whole year or two after I started learning the language.

-My other tip is…… Just have fun!! When I first started learning, I would get super happy whenever I heard a word I could understand in a song or anime.  When I thought about giving up, it was mainly because I was too focused on trying to rush, but you need to remember that it is impossible to learn an entire language overnight.

-I have heard a lot of other people say they learned the language because they studied it in college or used a textbook, but you can definitely learn it through self-study so don’t give up hope!  You just need to find what works for you. ^u^

 -Just a random note, Tsukiuta is special to me because it is the very first drama series I started following each month. Although I couldn’t speak any Japanese back then, I followed it for the music.  When I started listening to drama CDs, Tsukiuta was at the top of my list and I listened to all of them in the several months before the anime came out, so it was the first drama series I knew that got turned into an anime.  It was a super weird feeling seeing the characters animated after only being able to hear them.  The very first live stage I watched without subtitles was also the Tsukiuta stage, which got me obsessed with stage plays and musicals.  Now it has become the first series that I have translated for other people. (Just my own thought here but I’ve slowly been working on some cosplays, maybe I should make my Rui cosplay first too so it will follow the pattern XD)

 -Well that got long but I hope I have motivated someone else to learn the language too!  It is still crazy for me to think that 5 years ago I knew absolutely nothing, but I’m translating stuff now.  I love being able to give back and help other people, especially since I know how upsetting it is when you want to read or watch something, but there aren’t any subtitles.  >x<

-If anyone else has any other questions, feel free to ask! ^u^

[surveysonfleek]

543.

5000 Question Survey Pt. 31

2901. have you ever written a letter to: a friend: yes. a lover: yes. a celebrity: yes, but i never sent it. congress/house/reps: only to the mayor, it was a task in elementary lol. the president/leader of your country: no. 2902. Why are cigarette companies allowed to manufacture and sell cigarettes when they are so unhealthy and dangerous? it’s basically the same as why do mcdonalds sell food? people will always buy things that are bad for them. 2903. Do you chat with people in an elevator? only at work because i know them lol. 2904. What's your favorite Jack Nicholson movie? i don’t have one.

2905. Who should play the part of Superman? never been a fan, so idk. 2906. Do you like when your friends and your mate's friends hang out? we have the same group of friends. 2907. Doritos or Cheetos? cheetos!!!! 2910. Do you brush your teeth three times a day? no, more like 1-2 lol. 2911. Should I stop making questions with multiple parts and just count each actual question as a question? yes. 2912. What gives your ego a boost? genuine unexpected compliments. 2913. What knocks your ego down? genuine unexpected critiques. 2914. Live and let live or live and let die? either or. 2915. What do you think of Damien Hirst's art piece Mother and Child, which is half a cow in formaldedhyde? i don’t know it. 2916. Why is it that 70 percent of americans Do Not want to go to war with Iraq and yet we are going to war with Iraq anyway? eh, not knowledgeable on this subject. Is this democracy? - 2917. Imagine you have two choices of what life you can live: One: You are provided with meals, medicine, clothes and shelter. You are always with your family. You can lie in the sun and smoke, drink, play, cook, etc.. There will be certain rules you must follow such as no killing, no hurting others, no leaving the commune you were born in, no stealing, no tv, no newspapers and no books. OR Two: You are turned loose in the world with nothing. You start out cold and hungry. You may stay cold and hungry forever but you also have the opportunity to try and make a life for yourself. This will take a lot of hard work and there is no guarantee you will ever live comfortably. Which life do you choose? it depends how much knowledge and street smarts i have, but i’d probably choose the second option. WHY? because i know the world has so much to offer. if i worked hard enough i could basically get all the benefits of option one and even more. 2918. Why is there no 'Mr. America' pageant? isn’t there? there’s a mr. universe right? Should there be? i’m not that fussy. What qualities would YOU look for in a Mr. America if such a contest were to exist (like miss america he would have to be a role model)? same qualities as miss america i guess. 2919. If something offends you do you feel that it has no right to exist? in a perfect world, yes. but life doesn’t work that way. 2920. Why do advertisers seem to believe that guys will buy any product that a hot girl in a bikini is sitting next too? well, sex sells. 2921. What would you do if your mom had a fight with a male aquantance and you heard an answering machine message he left her cursing at her, calling her names and being very disrespectful? i’d ask her wtf is going on and take actions into my own hands. i can’t handle the idea of people being rude to my family. 2922. What do you represent? myself? lol. 2923. What message does ___ send when given as a birthday present?flowers: a kind gesture i guess. i’m not a flowers kinda gal though. slippers: a possible regift? i’d use it anyway. candles: everyone likes candles so it’s a universal gift i guess. diamond necklace: a grand gesture coming from someone with money obviously lol. gift certificate: didn’t know what to get you, but here’s a gift card! cash: unthoughtful but very useful. books: tbh i gift books a lot i think it’s good for kids and stuff. 2924. Have you ever completed a paint by number? yeah most likely. If yes of what?/ i had a lot of these books as a kid, so i don’t remember a particular one lol. 2925. How long has it been since you colored in a coloring book? i’ve done it sometime this year. 2926. What have you been caught doing? smoking haha. 2927. Does temptation make you do what you love? hmm not really? 2928. Do you have an gadgets in the house that you don't know how to use? What? the washing machine lol. it’s all a guessing game. 2929. Do you read the instructions to things or skip them? i skim through them. 2930. Will you ever reach your full potential? i sure hope so. 2931. Who is your biggest fan? my family and boyfriend. 2932. Who do you take care of? my family and boyfriend. Who takes care of you? same ^ 2933. Do you think that lawyers should only argue cases when they feel like the client is in the right? i guess so but money is the motivation i guess. representing someone they wouldn’t necessarily support could also help their arguing skills idk. If you were a lawyer would you argue cases when you felt like your client was completely wrong? not sure... 2934. Is it sexy in here or is it just me? it’s just you. 2935. You are giving out your phone number to a HOTTIE by writing it on a napkin. Do you write a little note or draw a picture too? If yes, what? i would never do this. 2936. Can you fold paper into anything (a hat, a swan, a boat, etc)? What? yes, i can make little 3d stars haha. 2937. How can a girl get a guy-she-is-dating's mom to like her better? just be yourself. mothers of sons are always harder to please, just like fathers of daughters. 2938. What is one theory about life or anything that you came up with that no one else has? nothing haha. 2939. Do you like answering questions about: (bold) your life? your taste? tv? music? art? politics? life? religion? issues? sex? loved ones? favorites? objects? math? philosophy? hypothetical situations? things that require lots of thought? 2940. The mortuary science department is having a bake sale. Does this strike you as funny? pretty random. 2941. What would you think of a new reality tv game show where real life criminals on death row competed in life threatening tasks for the prize of a reduced sentence? pretty sadistic if you ask me. Did you know that they are considering making this a show? no idea. Would you watch it? probably not. 2942. What was the last song you looked up the words to? curve. 2943. What Saturday morning cartoons do you like? the only one i remember watching was saturday disney. 2944. If anything's possible, then is it possible that nothing's possible? no. 2944. What does the T in T-Shirt really mean? the shape of a tee? idk. 2945. Would you alter your routine if there was a sniper in your area? haha i guess so. If so how? head straight to my door as fast as i can, draw the curtains to all windows. 2946. Is castration a good punishment for extreme or repeat sexual offenders? eh... why not. idk. 2947. If you are a girl have you ever experienced penis envy? nope. If you are a guy would you still want to live if you had to be castrated? 2948. Imagine you are teaching a class of sixth graders. A the start of the year you tell them, "If you come away with class and have learned only ONE THING, I hope that you learned....(finish the sentence) idk. 2949. If you were being interviewed for a job in a clothing store how would you sell yourself to the prospective employers? obviously wear clothes that they sell at the store, research the brand a little and keep up to date with their seasons, promos etc. 2950. How do you stop pop up ads? adblock. 2951. You are alone. You take a bus to the mall. The stop is right in the mall parking lot. You window-shop. You don't buy anything. You want to get back on the bus to go home when you realize you have lost all your money. You have no cell phone. All the payphones are jammed with gum. You can not get it out. How do you get the $1.50 you need to get on the bus and get home??? i’d go to the mall, visit each store and ask them if i can contact someone to pick me up. 2952. How long would it take you to organize your bedroom? probably an entire day. 2953. Make up a nickname for your bedroom: no. 2954. What comes after: I've got a love-a-lee bunch of coconuts (diddly dee) There they are a-standing in a row. <--- this Big ones, small ones, some as big as your head... 2955. Where ARE the wild things? in our dreams. 2956. You get a six cd changer for the car, only problem is that you know that once you put in six cd's you can NEVER take them out. Which 6 cd's do you put in? i wouldn’t bother. as long as my car had an aux in, i’m all good. 2957. Let's play Jeapordy. (Do-Do-Do-Do-Do-Do-Dooooo-) I'll give some answers..you give the questions. Ready? Begin. The answer is: Purple what colour is barney the dinosaur? Yellow what colour is a banana? Candle what’s something you can light up during a romantic dinner? Pepsi who’s coke’s biggest competitor? Peace what does a dove symbolize? Lisa what’s the name of the eldest simpsons daughter? Cotton what type of fabric are most t-shirts made out of? Flag haha idk. 42 idk. 2958. Pick a letter. d. List some great words starting with that letter: no. 2959. Is eight days a week enough to show you care? no haha. 2960. Have you told your parents you love them today? no. 2961. What is the difference between a number two pencil and any other kind of pencil? its tone, thickness idk. 2962. Have you ever cross-dressed? no. 2963. Are we living in a world without end? probably not. 2964. What do you think of that couple that was just on the news who kidnapped a 16 year old girl for a week and forced her to be their sex slave? that’s terrifying and disgusting. it sucks to think there must be so many more undocumented cases like this. 2965. Wanna watch a movie about a cheerleading competition? only if it’s bring it on. 2966. Are you singing in the rain? no. 2967. Should the sopranos actors have been allowed to march in the St Patrick's Day parade? idk? 2968. Is oral sex, anal sex or regular sex more intimate? regular. 2969. Is it time to switch to Decaf? i do drink decaf from time to time. 2970. Why is it that the truth hurts? because some people can’t handle it. 2971. How do you feel about: ticketmaster? laggy. scalpers? it depends. we bought tickets from a scalper at an ice hockey game once for a fair price and they were the best seats in the house. i don’t think i’d ever do that again though. 2972. What are you guilty of? being lazy. 2973. Have you ever done any of the following in order to catch a buzz or get high? sniffed glue: i did this as a kid coz i liked the smell, not to get high. sniffed magic markers: nope. ate paste: no. drank Nyquil, rRobitussen or any other Over-the-counter drug: no. 'huffed' (inhaled or sniffed) any kind of fabric softner, cooking spray or other household product: no. whip-its: no. 2974. What gives you inner stregnth? inspiration. 2975. ::eyes you suspiciously::Where have all the COOKIES gone? idk. i don’t eat cookies. 2976. What is a good gift for someone you don't like so that it SEEMS to be nice but really 'gets' them somehow? haha no thanks. 2977. If you don't like the service at a restaurant would you skip the tip? yes. Why or why not? because tipping in australia isn’t mandatory. 2978. Apples or peaches or pumpkin pie? apple. 2979. What Race/nationality was Jesus? israeli?  2980. What was one evening you'll never forget? every night of coachella. 2981. Name 13 ways to look at a blackbird: no. 2982. Trick or Treat? treat. 2983. If you had money to burn, what 'toy' would you spend your money on (think monopoly game with real money, luxory boat, a train layout that takes up a house, etc.)? a tesla. 2984. Are you having trouble with aol 8.0? lol this is so old. Or if you don't have aol...have you ever been to a podiatrist? nope. 2985. If you could write your own ten commandments, what would they be? 1 no thanks. 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 2986. When people lose weight, where does it go? it’s been burnt. 2987. Your mate/partner/wife or husband/longterm boy or girlfriend/etc. has SOMEHOW gotten his or her FAVORITE celebrity's attention. Your sweetie has always thought this celeb was so sexy and now the celeb kinda fancies your sweety as well(although the celeb is not interested enough to stick around for more than one night). Your sweetie wants to have a one night stand with the celeb. Knowing that this is your sweeties one and only chance to bang (or even hang out with) a celebrity (ESPECIALLY their FAVORITE celebrity) you would say: lmao. i’ve had this convo with my boyfriend before. i’d let them hang, whatever. 2988. Have you ever seen an Ed Wood film? no. if yes, what one(s) and what did you think? If no, aren't you curious to see a movie by the person known as the worst director of all time? 2989. What kind of bread do you like to eat (white, rye, potatoe, grain, whole wheat, etc)? white. 2990. Are you emotionaly articulate? yes. 2991. Does everything happen for a reason? i’d like to think so. 2992. Do you take a piece of those you have loved and carry it around forever? eh, not really. If yes, than aren't they still with you even when you are gone? 2993. Is it true that the child is worth ten of the parent? never heard of that. 2994. Can you think of a door that has closed in your life? yes. Can you think of a window that has opened? yes. 2995. What does this mean to you: 'Necessity is the mother of invention'? Do you believe that necessity is also the mother of: courage? survival skills? independence? idkkkk. 2996. What helps you to get over a Major heartache? time. and things to distract yourself with. 2997. Can you depend completely upon yourself? yes. have you ever tried? yes. 2998. How can you tell the difference between the end of one part of your life and the beautiful beginning of the next part? i can’t. 2999. Have you ever read an stories by Kate Chopin? no. If not, I suggest that you do. 3000. Do you often make the best discoveries when you really weren't looking for anything (or anyone)? yes.

[survivor-iceland]

Ep. 3 - “hopefully failure does not turn into fracture” - John

Dylan C

oh nvm, it was Jack lol

Timmy

I was half a second from muting Ellie on my own during the tribal. Also JACK LEFT 🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉🎉

John

first vote, check. first blindside, check. feels good knowing i helped spearhead the vote flip from stephen onto jack, but if jack comes back he might be out for blood. luckily enough for us worms, the vote morphed into a 7/1 landslide, so he might come after maynor or stephen or keith before me and my peeps. but only time will tell.

Timmy

ELLIE DRINK WATER CHALLENGE, DO THAT CHALLENGE

Keith John

Last night was a tough vote. Jack made people paranoid. Even though i wanted him to stay. No one in my alliance felt easy with him. Even though i wanted jack around as he was good in chllenge and wanted to work with me. But it is what it is. 

Raffy

I finally managed to get into an alliance with Ellie and Timmy. Though it is not the biggest, I feel confident that these two will serve me well, at least in the premerge. It's called the Just Go For It Alliance, courtesy of Timmy. And we almost got caught forming it because of Cormac which is iconic. Speaking of him, I don't really know what to make of him. He's very... weird. Like it's hard talking to him, but I feel the same way about Keith so whatever. Plus, I don't really trust Cormac considering he basically made a day 1 alliance with two people on my tribe and Sierra. I need to keep an attentive eye on him.

Ellie

I am so immensely thankful for the tribe call last night. It was filled with things I needed to hear, of course we joked around with the fact that I can’t turn on a stove but I was also so thankful for the amazing people in the call making sure that I take care of myself which I haven’t been doing lately. Life has been really hard on me and it feels like a never get a break, sometimes I neglect taking care of myself because I feel that I physically and mentally can’t. I function on caffeine and I get 2-5 hours of sleep on a good night. Last night was kind of a wake up call because I learned that I am putting myself in danger by neglecting myself and my needs. It was really hard for me to accept that but I feel like I have bonded with these people BEYOND the game, they feel like my family now. Life sucks and I get really unmotivated sometimes and can’t bring myself to get out of bed or even eat, but I’ve gotten a lot better and I hope to continue getting better and the people in that call have already played a huge part in that by motivating me to care about my wellbeing and take care of myself, I will always be thankful for that. 

Raffy

I feel like I am bonding well with people? It's hard to get a read on some of them, but I think it's fine for now. Other than that, John came up to me asking for a game bond that I thought we already have. Either way, that seems to be my way into an alliance with him. Hopefully we can grow our numbers and build a trustworthy yet powerful group. We're suspecting a swap pretty soon so I hope that I've bonded with the right people in order to be successful.

Dylan C

I haven’t been socializing enough lately with anyone, and wasn’t going to today but then today was Yikes so. I did miss the tribe call for the challenge because I was on the phone with my friend. Maybe I could’ve made it but eh. Hopefully that one point isn’t going to make or break us. And if it did, well I’ve also done a lot for this challenge already soooo

Ellie

I’m going to be picking flour out of my eyebrows for days

Raffy

I hope we win the challenge. I'm kind of scared that so many things were left blank, but this has got to be enough

Dylan C

BITCH

several of us on this tribe were just on a call saying we didn't wanna vote anyone out smh

I keep agreeing when people say they can't come up with a name for tribal but I do actually have one in mind. I'd say Justin since he seems to be around somewhat less, but it's still not great. I mean, I'd rather not vote anyone

So I've talked with Raffy and Joseph and they agree w/Justin. Haven't specifically mentioned names with anyone else. Ellie says she's just going to listen, and not throw out any names. Also didn't ask my thoughts lol. I'll expand on this more when I record my next video confessional

Timmy

Ughhh we lost, I say we but like I did nothing for the challenge so I was a big contributor to the loss. But now people want justin out and like Justin wants to work with me so I’m not here for that. Honestly I have an alliance that will half the tribe after tomorrow so i would like to have a majority group with him, but I’m still in a good spot without him here. I would rather get Joseph or Dylan R out this round though.

John

okay so apparently cormac wants sierra out after stephen now which is news to me. i just agreed and nodded and was like “okay cool” bc i don’t want to draw negative attention towards myself by acting like i’m trying to protect them, but like i don’t think blindsiding them would be the best move? this game is going to get crazy quick. plus if he’s thinking of taking them out, what if all of a sudden they wanna flip on me? in engineering terms, cracks are propagating on the surface of the material, and it’s not long until failure occurs. hopefully failure does not turn into fracture.

Timmy

Joseph and I haven’t spoken in a few days yet he messages just saying “so, tribal” in bold and I’m like wtf like I’m not gonna talk to you about tribal yet, I need to see if I can trust you first.

Dylan C

What is the big risk I'm taking for the idol and risking my vote at tribal? A fucking puzzle with a shit ton of blue sky and snow, and the piece are weird and r o t a t e. I'm not getting this shit done by 11pm tomorrow! Not when I'm in classes all day, and then have DnD not long after. And I made an account to save my progress, putting my name in it so if I do finish and end up on the leaderboard for someone else to see. You know what I've got tonight? BDE. That's right: big dummy energy. At least the vote seems almost unanimous at this point, so that could easily change, but if it goes like it seems like it will then my vote won't matter too much.

Dylan C

41 minutes and 40 second in, 32%, brain is fried JustinAlright so I am a bit nervous for this tribal considering I have not been too active for this round, but I am still confident I can move the target onto someone else. I was thinking I can possibly get people to vote out Dylan R considering he has been more inactive than I have. Although, the other tribe blindsiding Jack makes me weary because it might have caused people on my tribe to make a move against a more active player. So, I need to be on my toes to make sure that is not me. Also, remember how I said I want to work with Timmy? Well I messaged that bitch asking if he wants to work with me officially, but he hasn't answered even though he has been online since I have sent the message. So, honestly I might try to target him considering he has not been super active either.

Keith John

I have been a bit busy these past few days, havnt spoken to everyone much. Good thing we won immunity. So scrambling is at its minimum. i got a feeling a swap is coming up. Makes me nervous. I dont have many connections on the other side.

Except Justin, spoke to him a few times. Raffy and Ellie I spoke to but they feel like people who talk to everyone. so I dont know if they have my back. Whilst Timmy even didnt reply to my hi. As guess he is clear about not working with me

Stephen

Hi. My name is Mr Immune, which I almost misspelt as Mt Immune, wouldn’t that be entertaining? Anyway the tribes feeling good, John and Sierra are cool, Zoes nice, Maynors nice but oddly distant. Everythings middle of the road atm, nothing great but nothing sucky. I’ll probably try and cruise for a bit on social connections until swap or something equally spicy pops up.

Maynor

I have continued doing the puzzles and I have 3 of them left. Hopefully the idol isnt found yet. We’ll see. Im so happy we were able to win immunity cuz i was slowly freaking out that Jack said my name. Atleast i just screamed inside my head and didnt become as paranois as Jack. He literally made himself the target. Everyone agreed on Stephen then his paranoia happened and it switched onto him.

P.S. ❤️ Jay

Sierra

After Jack got voted out, I was worried that we were going to lose the next challenge. I was so relieved when we actually pulled through and won! We all really worked so hard to win that one... and even though I’m in an alliance, I’d rather not have to test things again just yet.

Raffy

God I hate tribal. It’s ugly. Though I instantly have a name in mind: Justin. He’s the person I trust the least and have talked to the least. I talked to Ellie and Dylan C about it. They seemed to be on board with the whole thing. We just need one more vote which should be easy to get. After all, I am in an alliance with Timmy, so it should be easy for me to get four votes. I’m just hoping that he doesn’t have an idol.

Last night, I was talking to Dylan a little bit. Apparently, they are are scared that they haven’t been added to any alliances and they feel like alliances are being made. So I suggested making an alliance with them and I. They’re in a vulnerable position which is great for me since it means they’ll be more willing to work with me. After tribal, I’m hoping that we can create an alliance together with some other people. I’m excited!!!

Ellie

So it’s between Justin and Dylan R and I have the deciding vote?? More drama coming soon

Justin

Ok these bitches are making me mad. I approached Ellie and Dylan C for alliances. Luckily, they both said yes to individual alliances, but as soon as I brought up the idea for all of us to join together plus Raffy they go mute. That is definitely concerning, but I brought up Dylan R’s name to all three as a target this vote and I can only hope they stick to their word to vote them out. I also made an official alliance with Keith, and he spilled the beans that he has been talking to Raffy a bit which makes me nervous. However, I have changed my stance on Raffy because he actually talks to me quite a lot. But, I am aware he is definitely playing this game hard and is talking to almost everyone. That is why I want to keep him close for the time being and then perhaps blindside him in a swap or early merge. Back to Keith tho, he is ITCHING to make a move. He told me it is his first time playing an ORG and he definitely wants to blindside people which as long as it ain’t me I’m good.

Joseph Collins

Me and Elle have been working so good together. I hope she doesn’t stab me in the back lol. The tribe consensus was Justin but I flipped them all to Dylan r. Blindsideeeeee coming. Hahahahaha. *evil laugh* *winky face

Joseph Collins

Lemme break down how I flipped the vote. I just told Dylan c that “look. I respect you. And I’d want someone to do this for me. The tide’s changing and I think the vote is gonna be Dylan R tonight. I don’t want you to be left out of a vote because I wanted to work with you so I feel like you should know” that establishes trust and kinda gets Dylan to switch her vote

John

i’m ready to make a legitimate move in this game. but it’s all about timing. our best move, if we lose again, is sending stephen outta here. WITH THAT BEING SAID, it’s on after that. bring on the bloodbath. not everything will be happy go lucky for long.

Joseph Collins

I orchestrated this blindside and took no credit in my voting message. Like a true mastermind. *maniacal laugh*

Justin

Biiiiiiiitch. I just found out bitches have been conspiring against me cuz of the time zone difference. So, I was right for being paranoid omg. The person who initially told me was Joseph of all people which was shocking since I probably talk to him the least besides Dylan R. But, I’m glad he did and then Timmy further confirmed it which I’m like hello again Timmy it’s been a bit bud. From what they have told me is that the majority is still on Dylan R. and I talked to Dylan C. about the vote and I straight up talked about the time zone difference not being an issue. They said they have a friend in Scotland so it doesn’t bother them so if at least those three and myself vote Dylan R. then I should be good.

Raffy

The tribe has switched their mentality and have decided to go with Dylan R. with this vote which I am fine with considering he does not talk to me at all either. Plus, Justin came up to me asking if we could align together in this game which is always a good sign. So, I was more inclined to keep him throughout the day. Either way, I think I should be safe at this tribal council.

Zoe

I’m a wild bitch.

For the scavenger hunt challenge, I definitely got a tattoo (of the water tribe symbol from avatar, don’t @ me) for a whopping 20 points, and we definitely won the challenge. While riding on that high I accidentally talked about the idol hunt and got a strike from the god-host, which made me feel like the ultimate failure. Other than that, I have several strong alliances which I am confident in going into the swap.

Dylan C

https://youtu.be/gpUevTrixLo

https://youtu.be/_Qpn_dE6fxs

Not feeling like typing this up in detail but the vote has now changed to Dylan R and I’m down with/that. I talked to some people about it and they agree. Joseph messaged me and was like “I feel I have to tell you since you said you wanted to vote Justin.” I was like “that’s sweet but I already knew.” And kinda tried to play it off after that like I’m a little worse at socializing than I actually am but idk how well that worked. I really should’ve made this confession 5 hours ago but oh well. (Those videos were filmed almost 12 hours ago). 

Dylan C

I actually finished the fucking puzzle and I can’t believe it. Also if I hadn’t, it would’ve counted against me next tribal, not tonight’s. Either way, I’m not losing that vote via that puzzle babey. 

[whatevenis2016-blog]

I just want my life to be different lol

I've been trying to find a new job bc I am so sick of my current job. It seems like my boss has no respect for me, bc it's a small business I don't even make minimum wage, I have to work every weekend and get a huge amount of shit if I want a weekend off (like once a year I ask), I'm a trainer so I always work with shitty new people and my boss doesn't even appreciate all the crap I have to deal with, it's food service which I obviously don't want to do forever or even much longer bc fuck that, I've worked there for almost 3 years which is way too long at a job like this. I want a different job that pays more, where I only have to work Monday through Friday, and work morning through early afternoon. At least until I go back to school in the fall. But like there only like 2 people left a work that I even like working with. So it's just a bunch of little thing that are all piling up until I hate work. And my coworker is also trying to find another job but she's afraid that if she gets a new it'll be worse than our current one. But idk maybe she feels that way but I don't think there could be a job that I like less than my current situation. Bc even if the job kind of suck, the pay will still be good, the hours will still be good. Ya know? I think it'll be fine, I just need out, I don't even care. I also hate school and don't want to go back. Like I'm regretting my whole school plan. Going straight from high school into college, first bad move. I should have taken a break bc now I feel like I'm dying. Going to a 4 years school instead of a 2 year, second bad move. I wish I had just gone to a 2 year school, got a degree in business and I would be done by now, like holy shit. I'm currently going to school for Studio Arts which I know is stupid. Who gets an art degree? Retards. That's who. But my "emphasis" is Graphic Design. So like obviously not as bad as like a painter, cuz then I would really be screwed in the employment department. But like the thing is, I don't really like Graphic Design? Okay maybe that's not right... It's more like I don't think I would like other people telling me how to make "art" for my job..? Cuz I wouldn't be able to make things I like, or do things my way bc it will be for someone else. Ya know? So I feel like I would either hate doing it, or my clients who hate my work. So like I'm feeling like I'm going to minor in Business like a smart person. I'm gonna go ham on that and then just finish my major up but really focus on my minor. Like I really just want to get a normal "desk job" tbh, work Monday through Friday. I feel like most people would hate that, or be their worst case scenario but I would be so down for that. Do the same thing everyday, have every afternoon and weekend off? Sounds great. And then in my spare time I can do all the things I actually enjoy. And I could possibly do some freelance graphic design in my spare time. But I really don't think I want to try and make a living out of that. Or I could try my hand in greeting cards and stuff cuz there's quite a bit of money in that market. I also want my appearance to be different. I don't like my current hair colour and I don't really have the time or money to do anything with it. I also chopped all my hair off over a year ago and I've finally decided to grow it out. But it's very short so it will take an insane amount of time to grow back. And it's at like an awkward length and I don't like the way it looks but the catch is, if I cut it to make it look better I would be losing length. In the long run in that worth it? Probs not. So I'm just kind of dealing with hair that I over all don't like. But once it gets to a decent length and I have money I'm gonna get extensions again. And my hair will look nice and I'll be happy. I've also gotten very lazy with my makeup which also makes me sad bc I don't feel that great about myself. I also want to buy all new cloths (bc I'm a girl and that's what we do) but I'm broke for 2 reasons, one bc I don't get payed enough at work and 2 bc my dad hasn't been working since he's had surgery. So I've been trying to save as much money as possible to we can, you know, live? And stay in our house? So in essence meaning not really having money for makeup or hair stuff or a lot of other stuff. Actually my work shoes are so fucked rn and people literally make fun of me but you know what? Fuck them. I don't have money to be buying a pear or shoes just for work? Plus I hate my job so that also adds to me not buying shoes for there. I also really want to get fake nails bc I love them. They look so nice and they make me feel good but again no money. Plus I fractured my finger a while ago and lost a finger nail. Sooo if I did get fake nails I would just be missing one nail lmao. When I finally have money one of the first things I'm going to do is buy a desktop computer. But it's gonna be crazy experience, I already know. Bc I want at least 2 monitors. One for graphic design (school and freelance) I think it will really help me get better bc I'll be able to work on stuff outside of school. It I'll be a touch screen and be adjustable. In addition to the monitor for graphic design I will need all the software. Then a second more standard monitor. I want both Windows and Mac on both monitors. I want to be able to game using both monitors. I want them to be able to use them individually and also simultaneously. Eventually I want to get all the stuff I need to live stream, so webcam, mics, headset, speakers. But like idk what I want to do first... Cuz I really want the set up to game.but I should probably get the graphic design stuff first... Or the other option would be to get the gaming monitor and cpu, then get both Windows and Mac and then get a drawing tablet thing instead of a touch screen monitor? Maybe probably. That would probably be the less expensive route.. and then just using external hard drives probably to keep my gaming and graphic design stuff separate. I also want to draw more and be better at drawing. But like I never have any motivation or inspiration to draw and or don't have time to do it. But maybe if I get the computer set up that I want, that will help with motivation. And if my work doesn't suck that much maybe I could sell my works online? That would be cool. I also want to get back into jewelry making and that's something else I could potentially sell which would be cool. Overall: No fucking idea. Like nothing about my life is how I want it to be except for my friends. I have awesome friends and a great boyfriend. But like I never get to see them bc of work and my dad stuff so even that sucks. But I have a plan. I know what I want, I just have to get there. I'll get there. Someday The thing is I know I can get to where I want eventually but like I don't want to be that old when it happens. Like it would suck to not be able to do all the fun things I want to do when I'm young bc I just can't bc of money or shitty jobs or school or so on. And like better late than never? Idk idk I don't know how I feel about all this. I just want to be happy

[cardio-maegaly]

Saturday was good. I opened at the store and finished my barista retraining. Then I went to The Parlor with Britton and some of her new friends. It went ok, but I had been up since 3am. I was tired and had a hard time socializing, so I felt awkward about that. I also felt a little out of place. I’m not really into sports, and I’m not as accomplished or settled in as everyone else there was. I felt a little insecure. But they were so friendly, everyone I met gave me hugs when I left & offered to walk out with me. It made me feel really welcomed.

Work yesterday went well, too. I really like working at Starbucks. Rude customers don’t bother me nearly as much as they used to. & I feel like it’s easy to get along with people that work there. There’s something about being in customer service that makes you really flexible and good at getting to know people quickly.

After work, I went to the dispensary. I couldn’t spend a lot, but being able to smoke a bit after work has really helped my anxiety & with being able to enjoy my time a little more. It also helps for when I want to sit down and focus on writing how I’m feeling.

Today’s my day off. The only thing I was planning on doing today was going to a nearby costume shop. I saw they had signs up for 60% off backpacks since the school year just started. If they’re not too expensive, I’d like to get a something to replace my laptop bag. My purse is too small for my apron and hat when I’m going to work, but my laptop bag is so big that it’s actually kind of unwieldy when the buses are busy.

I downloaded some otome games. I’ve been playing My Horse Prince since I got here. It’s hilarious and I’ve actually enjoyed it so much that I looked up some other, more serious novel-like games. Mystic Messenger was the most popular one, so I just started playing that today. I’m not ready for dating real people yet by a long shot, but uhh...damn it’s nice to see my phone blow up with cute messages from AI anime boys. 😍

I told Matthew I was going to be vegan when I came here unless the food was free (& then I’d stay vegetarian). But being by the ocean makes that pretty hard, I’ve bought seafood food twice (California sushi rolls! Fried shrimp by the beach! 🤤). I’m terrible, I know fish farming is bad for the environment (...and for the fish) but it’s an infrequent vice so I don’t feel too terrible about getting it occasionally. I’ve also been getting vegetarian options just because there’s so much to try here & I don’t want to limit myself when I’m going out & meeting people.

Ah, but since I’m only getting one paycheck in September & my budget is tight, I haven’t been able to eat out much. I feel better when I eat vegan & I need to lose weight anyways. I’ve been getting free meals from Starbucks, and cheap snacks and sandwiches for when I’m home. I’ve also been tracking my calories and staying around 1200-1500 calories for the last week. I felt better about my body and my health last year when I wasn’t 5 lbs overweight. & hell, eating less is one way to save money. 

But I’m already deciding where I want to go next when I can, maybe to celebrate things going good here on weeks where tips come in well. Place #1 is Doomie’s which has a closer location in Culver City now! That’s a bit of a bus ride from here, but it’s worth it because I’ve had it before & I know it’s my favourite vegan place here. Vegan animal fries are so much better than In n Out’s. It does suck that that’s the pricey option, though. Place #2 is C&O Trattoria. It wouldn’t have vegan options really, but I could eat vegetarian. It’s by work on the boardwalk, and it supposedly has the best garlic bread knots in LA. How can I KNOT try them? (ehh? ehh? >_>) According to reddit and Food Insider, it is custom to fill up completely on free garlic knots before your food comes out, and then take your entree home with you. Totally going to be doing that sometime when I move to my regular workplace.

Over the last week or so, I went through a couple different lists of personal values. I think it was helpful to consider what my own values are, some core personal ideals to consciously reflect in my actions. I didn’t settle on the ones that I wished I had. I think I’d be setting myself up for being disappointed in myself if I did that. Instead, I chose the ones that I think come naturally to me, make me feel good about myself when I uphold them, and make me feel like something’s wrong when I don’t.

They were:

Simplicity - I don’t really need a lot of “things” to be happy. I like traveling, I like food & cooking, I like having some art supplies & a ukulele or two around, and that’s about it. My happiest memories are when I’m just hanging out, indulging in those hobbies by myself or with a few close people. I feel satisfied and content when I can go to the ocean, or sing along to a meaningful song. I have fond memories of going to Friends meetings in Lawrence & meditating (even though I’m agnostic). I value experiences and close relationships over material wealth, signs of status, and other shallow or frivolous pursuits. As long as my needs are met, I’m healthy, & I have a peaceful routine, I am content. 

I’m not true to this one when I get insecure comparing my life to others. I feel like I should be earning more money or doing something more prestigious, and it leads me into situations where I’m not able to live simply or spend time doing the things I love. But I still worry sometimes that I’m not ambitious or successful enough. 

Authenticity - More than just simple honesty with others, I feel like it’s important to be honest with myself. I like me better when I let myself just be. I’ve always been kind of dorky and off-beat, and there’s nothing wrong with that. In fact, a lot of folks even like dorky and off-beat people! Being open with myself and others about how I feel and who I am reminds me that my inner critic is a harsher judge of me than anyone else ever is. & it’s okay to enjoy things, even if there’s reasons others might judge me for it. Just the fact that they make me happy is enough, and nothing else matters. Acting with integrity and being upfront about my mistakes is important to me.

I’m not true to this one when I try to alter or “dilute” my identity to suit the needs of others. I’m not always honest about how I feel because I try to avoid conflict. I sometimes feel insecure about being too dorky, too unrelatable, or too unskilled at my hobbies, and so I isolate my interests from others. These make me feel stifled.

Compassion - I feel good when I can make others feel good. I enjoy hosting friends & making a big dinner at a table for everyone to eat at. I don’t even like eating meat because it’s a product of animal suffering. I feel honored when someone feels enough trust in me to open up about their problems and let me help them solve them. I get satisfaction from being a part of something bigger than myself. It’s important to me to be thoughtful and considerate of those around me, and I’m motivated by what I can do to lessen others’ suffering.

This is actually the one value I feel like I overextend. But I’m not true to consistently acting with compassion when I spread myself too thin. I sometimes worry too much about other people’s problems and try to take them on as my own. I’m not always compassionate to myself. When I experience compassion fatigue and when I am not compassionate to myself, I retreat and I’m unable to help anyone. I feel like I need to learn to take care of myself first, like putting your oxygen bag over your own face before you’re able to help the people next to you.

Humor - I feel good when I can make people laugh. More than that, I've intentionally cultivated a sense of humor that is adaptive. It’s mostly affiliative (jokes everyone in a group would get, funny faces to make people laugh, wordplay, puns), but also about self-enhancing (jokes about my situation that aren’t mean to myself, but just generally commenting on the absurdity of life & being able to laugh at myself; “i watched so much steven universe that i moved to the beach and got a job on the boardwalk so i could eat fry bits & play ukulele by the ocean lol”). I like spreading cheer in a way that makes people feel good about themselves, and I feel proud when people know me for that. I make my own life and others’ easier when I use humor to diffuse stressful situations.

This is part a coping mechanism. I have a nervous laugh when I don’t know what to say, and it’s funny and odd so it makes others laugh. In fact, they enjoy it so much that they’ve intentionally tried to get me to laugh more. It’s such a defining part of *me* that sticks out to other people, that people miss when I’m not around, that I’ve learned to embrace it. I feel unhappy and disingenuous when I use self-deprecating humor or sarcasm. I get uncomfortable when others use a sense of humor that’s mean, aggressive, or self-deprecating.

Growth -  I feel best when I’m practicing open vulnerability about my struggles with others, and I appreciate it when others feel they can do the same with me. I always feel proud of myself when I admit I don’t know something and want to learn more. I love trying and learning new things just for the sake of it, & then teaching those new things to others. I get a lot of satisfaction from giving others useful advice. I find my thoughts frequently go to what I could be doing next, what my next challenge will be. I feel confident when I can look back on the person I used to be and see progress. Personal development is important to me.

Self-reflection can easily turn into unproductive navel gazing. Also, while I enjoy being in “advisor” roles where I can help others solve their own problems, I need to be careful to avoid “leader” or codependent roles where their problems become my responsibility. Sometimes, I try to spend too much energy solving problems that aren’t solvable and I stagnate. I have a hard time deciding what I want to do next, and that sometimes means I end up doing nothing at all.

[connerjterrell]

MYGSR Preview

Well boys, it’s that time of year again. Each year this league continues to grow and find new ways to make it interesting. This year, we finally pulled the trigger on a sick ass perpetual trophy that will hopefully be passed on for years. If you didn’t have the fire inside to win before, being able to proudly display that big ass trophy should provide more motivation than a Marcus Luttrell speech. I’d show every girl that I brought home from the bars (which is maybe 2-3 per year) that shiny bitch.

“Hey babe, you see that? Yep, I got that trophy for having unreal dick game. Lol jk I won my very important fantasy league with all my friends. Yes, it has to stay in the room while we fuck.”

You know it’s almost football season when the calendar flips to August and the group chat is getting aggressively personal while debating various college and fantasy football topics. The only thing that would make it better is if Justin was getting his fake taken away and trying to fight Kyle at the BG bars.

Before I go any further, I want to welcome our newest member, Peyton Spiess. Peyton, it says a lot about your dedication to sports that we selected you to be the tenth member. You have the privilege to join-in on year three of what may become one of the greatest fantasy leagues of all time. Welcome to it, baby.

A few nights ago I was looking through our two-year league history, and thought it’d be a gnarly idea to compile all of the statistics from both years. I used some #analytics to create some next-level spread sheets and keep it all organized. Those are pictured here. Hey did you guys know Justin was an analytics minor? Of course you do. He did help me figure out how to use filters in excel so props for that. After compiling wins, losses, and points for both years, I found some interesting trends that I’d love to share.

Bailey

Bailey’s fantasy football career is barely better than the night he had in Cincinnati last month. Bailey has tied for the worst win percentage (.360), the second least points-per-game (114.1) and the third-most points-per-game allowed (127.8).  Most of these statistics can likely be attributed to Bailey’s mind-boggling roster decisions. Some of which include holding three quarterbacks on the roster for multiple weeks.

Sawyer

As bad as Bailey seems, Sawyer has been as essentially as bad. Sawyer also has tied-for-the-worst win percentage, but has one fewer loss due to a tie with Justin in season 1. Sawyer is third to last in points per game (118.3). Sawyer’s average defense has really been the only thing to keep him above Bailey. I really just wanted to give Sawyer his own paragraph so we could point out that he's been as bad as Bailey and probably talks the most shit TO Bailey about fantasy. 

Cody

So I know you’re all wondering; since Bailey had second-to-last points per game, who had the least? I’ll tell ya: Cody Cocksuckin Cowgill. Home boy literally went 7-5 and made the playoffs by scoring 110.4 points per game, dead last in the league. Really doesn’t even make sense. He was “small but mighty” and by defying mathematics, he won some damn ballgames. Translation: he sucked but everyone shit the bed when they played him. It makes me sad that Cody fell from grace – to be honest he never really rose to grace either, but I love the guy anyhow.

Nick

Another unmistakable anomaly in this league comes from none other than Sir Nicholas Burke. Nick is a very close second place for points scored. He falls only 15 total points fewer than first place. You see these numbers and you’re like “wow! he must be a fixture in the playoffs!”, but you’d be mistaken. Nick somehow managed to wind up just barely ahead of Bailey and Sawyer with only ten wins. TEN WINS in TWO SEASONS -- almost impossible considering how much he scored. Then again his “fantasy defense” got absolutely steam-rolled every week and lead to him averaging the most points allowed over two years.

Other than what I’ve already covered, most of the statistics were fairly normal. It’s nice to see how your teams shake up with everyone over two seasons. Nick and Cody’s stats are by far the funniest.

I look forward to writing many more of these in the following season. Y’all better be doing your research because the draft and the season are DAMN close baby. I’m really looking forward to see how Bailey botches his draft picks this year – last year he made three good picks so he’s definitely due for a shitter. I’m sure Ethan is putting in an inordinate amount of research into the draft only for him to start out hot but lose 7 games in a row with a bunch of guys who are widely labeled “value picks.” I know Justin will try to draft a bunch of unproven rookies to try and carry his time like they miraculously did last year. I know Nick is also putting in a shit ton of research only for his team to get their shit pumped by every offense he goes up against. I know Kyle is going to be buying the hype on any and every big name player and come up with some goofy ass name for his team. I know Sawyer is probably reading Bleacher Report to cultivate his draft strategy. I know Gueedo isn’t researching dick, and he won’t be making any roster moves but somehow his team will win games. I know Eazy-E is out there in Chi town being a G, but I couldn’t tell ya how he prepares for the draft. I couldn’t tell you what the fuck Peyton is doing but he better have his shit together. I know I’m sitting here high as balls trying to finish this damn thing because I’ve been working on it for a solid three days. Good luck boys, and as the ever-wise philosopher Lil Pump once said: ESKETIT

p.s. You should definitely read that last paragraph while playing Lil Pump’s Esketit - shit will have you so hype you’re ready to strap the fuck up. Also every time I read “esketit”  in my head it sounds like I’m describing the breast of someone who lives in an igloo.