#i still dont care for 'lets get married and have kids' endings but if the kids go on to repeat the cycle? that fucks

[valtsv]

btw if you're going to go down the route of "everyone lives happily ever after, by which i mean gets married and settles down and plenty of kids" at the end of your story then the ONLY right way to do it is to give the villain character a kid as well and have these descendants meet and become best friends before the sins of their fathers inevitably come back to haunt them and turn their innocent childhood friendship into a nightmare psychosexual rivalry in which people are killed

[glassanimalcollective]

.

[slttygeto]

JJK MEN AS DADS — headcanons.

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥featuring: geto suguru, nanami kento and toji fushiguro.

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥note: enjoy this alternate universe where everyone is okay and safe and happy.

╰┈➤ interested in sending a commission?

╰┈➤ GOJO'S VERSION

—GETO SUGURU ;

some of you might not agree with me on this but he probably never saw himself becoming a dad

sure he loves kids, they do annoy him when they’re loud and all over the place but he never thought that he would have kids

that is until you announced to him that you were pregnant, and his entire world changed

his daughter is pretty much everything to him but he doesn’t spoil her (gojo does)

he wants to teach her proper manners, the right way to communicate things and isn’t big on spoiling

and you both end up raising a sweetheart who’s in love with uncle satoru.

“baby, stay in my sights.” you heard suguru talk to your daughter as you both walked down the food aisle. she was well mannered, didn’t act up or tried to be bratty when told something (unless she was having a really bad day, which was very different).

watching your husband parent a child that looked like a mix of you both was a different kind of love. he was gentle, careful and most importantly trying to be there for her.

from taking her on daddy-daughter dates, to talking things out with her when she was mad at him or when she messed up, suguru proved himself worthy of becoming someone’s father.

“who knew someone else would come along, and you’d call them baby,” you teased the man with a small smile, letting him push the cart while you walked next to him. he shot you a playful glare before grabbing a can of tuna.

“don’t even start—i somehow got used to speaking in girl voice from being forced to attend her tea parties…” he sighs but you know it's far from a tired one. he looks at your daughter with so much love, so much adoration that your heart flutters.

you were incredibly lucky.

“tell me you love me in your girl voice, come on,”

"move."

—NANAMI KENTO;

this man was made to be a father

despite how tired he looks he always makes time for you and your girl

very lovey dovey and is very proud of referring to you two as his girls

whenever he is asked to hang out, he goes 'lemme make sure my girls dont need anything'

hes quite literally the best

most patient, loving and understanding husband/father

ever since you gave birth, kento and your daughter had a routine. you two would feed her at 8p.m when he comes back from work, he would then take her to the bathroom where he would bathe her then read her a bed time story. he would then kiss her goodnight, keep the small moon shaped light turned on before closing the door.

it was endearing because he put it on so much effort when it came to her. you knew it was the bare minimum for a father, but you were still very grateful that you married a good husband and an even better father.

both kento and your daughter were now in the bathroom. bath time usually took about twenty minutes to half an hour, and it would be filled with giggles coming from your four year old and kento's occasional chuckles. but it was oddly quiet, so you decided to go check on them.

when you opened the door, your heart melted at the sight. your daughter had fallen asleep in the bathtub, and so your husband was trying his best to get her out and dry her up before she caught a cold.

and he was doing it so quietly that you couldn't help but ask if he needed any help.

"baby, do you need help?" you whispered to the man holding the sleeping girl, lightly kissing his nape and squeezing his shoulders.

"I got this." he whispered in response, turning around and pressing a light kiss on your lips and forehead.

you watched with heart eyes as he gently woke her up to dry her hair, kissed her forehead and continued on with their routine, before it was time to say goodnight.

nanami kento was an angel sent from above.

—FUSHIGURO TOJI;

this man isn't new to parenting, in fact you knew you weren't his first wife

but you were accepting of it, helped giving the grieving man a second chance at life as he liked to say

you met megumi when he was still so young and the little boy loving you was enough reason for toji to confirm that you were indeed the right one

loving a child that wasn't yours wasn't given to everyone, toji was well aware of that

and as you watched the man parent megumi, you were a bit hesitant to announce to him your pregnancy

when you did tho, he sobbed like a baby

and twins? a boy and a girl? oh he was in for a ride

"you little rascals better let me love on my wife in peace." your husband whispered to the two sleeping babies in their cribs. it was 9p.m and they were fortunately fast asleep.

you on the other hand, were busy with your oldest.

finally after getting them in bed, you were with megumi in the kitchen asking him what you should pack for his lunch tomorrow, which the ten year old responded with what he typically always chose.

megumi wasn't a difficult child, but with the arrival of the twins, you were a bit worried that he would think you and toji no longer cared for him. dealing with twins wasn't easy, but you were aware and willingly brought two lives to his family, and were fully responsible for it.

when toji was with the twins, you would help out megumi with his homework. and when it was time to breastfeed the babies, toji would take megumi to basketball practice or engage in a random activity together.

"a juice box?" you asked while packing his lunch, which the little boy nodded at before staring at who was coming down the stairs.

"you got school tomorrow at 8?" toji asked megumi, and the little boy responded with a nod. not much of a talker.

"are they asleep?" megumi quietly asked his dad, who raised an eyebrow at him before saying 'yes' and you watched as your son fiddled with his fingers, anxious of what to say next.

"gumi, do you wanna see them?" you stepped in, a hand resting on his back. the little boy looked up at you with sparkly eyes, grateful that you understood him.

"go, and if they do wake up call me." you kissed his forehead and watched as he carefully tiptoed upstairs.

toji's eyes stayed glued on you during the entire interaction, and finally let his arms wrap around your waist once your son was upstairs before resting his forehead on your shoulder.

"thank you," he whispered out, pressing his lips to the side of your neck.

"for what?" you chuckled, caressing the taller man's back.

"for making everything feel like it's worth it."

2023 © all works belong to slttygeto. do not repost my work anywhere else.

[halitis]

I… need to know if you have more HalbarryOllie thoughts? Please and thank you!

HI OP. tysm for asking because i am actually Always filled with thoughts. they rotate in my mind like a microwave 24/7 :3

this is a mix of headcannons and observations, so i hope that's what you were looking for! sorry it's a billion long i got Invested...

hal and barry for some reason, love to carry each other. they will pick each other up just whenever, barry usually carrying hal in a bridal grasp or hal carrying barry either like a potato sack or creating s construct to carry him. ollie judges them heavily, what freaks. (the first and last time barry tries to carry ollie when it's not necessary, it ends with him taking a solid hit to the crotch. hal will not stop laughing.)

ollie and hal both have leftover habits and trauma from poverty. when one of them sees the other with negative food behaviour, or accidental hoarding they don't say anything because they know they behave the exact same way. another holdover they have, is the stubborn pride that you HAVE to do it yourself. a pipe bursts or something: cue hal and ollie covered in water, apartment flooded, water damage everywhere but Fuck if they aren't going to figure out how to do this! they are outraged when they realised barry called a plumber.

i don't think they will ever get married in anyway, gonna be honest. hal and his commitment issues go brrr and ollie i think just Doesn't like marriage (roy had to get this opinion from somewhere, see below). the only way i ever see them getting married, is because barry wants to (fucking midwesterner), but even then i don't think he actually would want it that badly. i think that paired with the fact that not all of 3 of them can be married, that they just dont bother. paper is not needed to make your love anymore real.

[continued beneath the read more]

ollie and barry at first, just get along for hal. like he is a child of divorce. i think they would start getting really close after a long mission. you know when you are just so bone tired you lose the will to fight? they are just lazing about, and someone says something that usually would start an argument and instead the other just laughs and it's history from there on. they still bicker and argue sure, but they both know it's playful.

another reason they might have to start getting along, is their kids! wally and roy are good friends and at the beginning, some of the only sidekicks. i think their initial dislike manifests in passive-agressive one upping each other. ollie buys the boys a full spread for dinner, barry takes them to europe to try authentic food. barry takes them out to a water park, ollie rents out a themepark for them. the boys probably encourage it, especially wally.

im not gonna start spewing roywally propaganda in this post, but just know that the parallels between them and ollie x barry have me in a deathgrip.

ollie is the Only cis person in this relationship. i hc barry as transmasc, and hal as either gnc or genderfluid. ollie's the diversity hire guys <3 (if you include dinah in this, she is also trans! its cannon dont @ me)

the first time there is ever a Proper Fight in the polycule, it's between hal and ollie. ollie's habit of calling people nazis and facists usually don't bother hal (he was in the army, he had to get over letting dumb insults bother him). but just at some point, he's having a Bad Day and he just loses it at ollie. logically he knows it's not targeted but calling the jewish guy a nazi just set him off. they are both too stubborn to break the silence after the fight, it takes barry dragging ollie like a misbehaving cat to hal's to apologise before they get over it. ollie is now very careful to censor himself like that around hal.

honestly if anyone wants me to expand on my thoughts on jewish hal, or transgender halbarryollie PLEASE ask. im a hairtrigger away at any given moment.

ollie and hal both LOVE boxing, they love going to matches and watching. at some point, they start trying to include barry and take him along to the fights. barry for the life of him Cannot enjoy this shit. somehow, at some point, they end up at a wwe match and they all become avid fans. date nights now include lazing on the couch with takeout and watching playbacks on tv.

barry runs so fucking hot, and ollie runs cold. leaving hal to fucking Despise sharing a bed with them. genuinely his worst nightmare. even the army was better than this. it is not uncommon to find hal on the floor asleep.

after hal's death, ollie doesn't cope with it very well. killing his bf fucks him up so greatly, he ends up really clinging to barry. barry also isn't handling well but he can't let himself fall apart, he needs to be there for ollie. they start living together basically full time, until one day barry's grief just builds up too much and he ends up saying something he regrets in the heat of an argument (probably something along the lines of blaming ollie for hal's death or he's only staying with ollie because of hal). ollie storms off and barry is just... Gutted. before they have time to reconcile, ollie dies. (if im getting my timelines wrong don't look at me, i will sob)

not a single one of these men have fashion taste. they all dress like the loser middle aged men they are. fucking fashion crimes against humanity! hal steals their clothes quite frequently, which is controversial considering he is the largest person out of the three of them and their shirts and stuff are definitely Too tight. (ollie and barry aren't complaining though, except for when they get their clothes back and they are so fucking stretched)

i love picturing them as cheerleaders. not like, in the actual getup, but just as them being the PROUDEST boyfriends. hal and barry bragging about how ollie is the best shot in the world (hes not but its fine :3), green arrow and lantern standing to the side on a mission and just watching flash adoringly because they know he doesn't need their help, ollie and barry smugly parading around hal like "yeah. this is my bf. hes so hot i know. he's so smart as well." none of them have any idea they are doing it though. they are gag worthy.

ollie's love language is gifts but not always monetary. more like making them food, taking them out places and stuff like that. its the thought and effort that goes into it, that's why does it. barry's is touch, this man LOVES hugs and draping himself over his bfs. hals is acts of service! he wants to help and just do whatever he can for them whenever possible. you could see that hal bases his selfworth off of how much he can do for others, which is so horrible and sad. so yknow. brainworms.

ollie's house accidentally becomes their usual meeting place, but only because he fucking HATES the zeta tubes. whenever he meets them anywhere, he will always whine about how they make him sick. barry does offer to pick him up, but it's a point of pride to him at this point, he can't just admit defeat to the zeta. barry and hal make a silent agreement to just meet him instead. (this was based off an actual comic panel, but i cannot for the Life of me remember which one).

none of them show up on time to dates. it actually becomes so incredibly common that when they miss them, no one takes offence anymore. cue one time where they all missed a date, and are sheepish around the others and keep trying to make it up to them. it takes 3 days before they realise that none of them were there.

and that's it for now! thanks for reading mwah maah

[little-forest-goblin]

First impressions Pt.3

Regency!Five Hargreeves x reader

Synopsis: In the regency era every woman wanted to marry a man that was wealthy and had good status. there was little time to get to know one another. But you Y/N L/N are the most reluctant to these whole marriage to random men you don’t fully know.

———————————————————————

———————————————————————

“Excuse me? mind if i cut in?”

You looked at him a little surprised. You looked to edward silently pleading him not to let him cut in but it went right past his head “Oh yes of course.” you cursed every god above and below for doing this to you. Edward let go of you and allowed five to cut in. Five took your hand in his and put his other one on your waist. You looked at him in disbelief. he looked down at you with a cocked eyebrow “what?”. you about wanted to blow up at him for just saying what but you had to keep your voice down and not draw a damned scene to yourself even though, in your opinion, it was hella justified. “What do you mean what?! You did that on purpose!” you said halfway a whisper and more seething. He sighed and looked down at you “I dont like him.” you about had half a mind to knee him in his dick but you kept yourself in line “What about him could you possibly not like?” he stayed silent for a moment considering and thinking until he came to his conclusion “He gives me the creeps.” you snorted “Yeah and you don’t give anyone else the creeps? You walk around with this air of miserable and arrogance it’s honestly quite astonishing. Your ego is as big as a-“ of course he cut you off not very fond of you insulting him “Now listen here, princess. i just don’t like his vibe! Now will you quite complaining and maybe let’s enjoy a dance, alright?” you looked shocked for a moment. How dare he interrupt with his arrogant babbling! “Why do you care anyway? Last i remember you didn’t like me to much and had no desire to get to know me.” you smirked satisfied with your comeback whilst his face dropped “You heard all that?” you nodded still looking quite satisfied with yourself. The dance fell into a silence until he broke it once more “I never said i didn’t have any desire to get to know you” you looked at him in the eyes trying to search for any false hope but when you found none yours softened. “Well then maybe don’t lie next time” he playfully scoffed “Oh please i never even mentioned that i didn’t want to get to know you. That was fabricated by your overthinking brain.” You glared at him till he got a small smile and you couldn’t help but laugh. You and him ended up talking randomly about the dance and party events.

At some point a while after you and him danced you and him ended up standing to the side with a glass of wine and watching some of the more crazy events of the party gossiping and giggling like school girls. He gestured to a older woman who looked uptight and like a stick was right up her ass keeping her walking straight. She had a fan fanning her face with a grumpy bored look and next to her was a man who was attempting to get her attention. “See that old woman? Her name is Mrs penfrock. The young man next to her is Mr penfrock” you looked to him shocked “No?! no that cant be that young man with that old woman?” he nodded and sipped his wine before bringing it away from his lips “Mhm thats him. Thats her 7th husband.” you gasped softly “7th? no! you must be kidding! You dont think she is-“ he interupted “killing them? oh yes i do. They all died of mysterious causes. If i had a say i’d search her home.” you chuckled sipping your wine looking over at him past the cup. he turned and looked at you meeting your eyes. Something in you both made shivers go down your spine’s. You set down your cup onto a small table. He chuckled softly you quirked a brow “What is it?” he shook his head “You have wine on your lips” you went a little wide eyed “oh! oh dear i-“ he brought his hand to your lips resting under your chin and his thumb wiping tour upper lip “Here…i got it” you stood frozen in place. you didn’t move. You didn’t make a fuss. You just let him. His thumb gently moved over your upper lip getting the wine and then to your bottom lip swiping away wine. His eyes locked onto yours and his pupils slightly blown and yours must’ve been too. His thumb stopped on your lip gently pulling it down a little. You don’t have a clue what came over you but you wrapped your lips around his thumb and your tongue gently licked the pad of his thumb, licking away the wine. His eyes went wide and his pupils blew wider. he let it happen his eyes locked on yours and soon a low rumble came from his chest. He leaned forward his hand against the wall behind you “If i were you i would stop before i am no longer able to contain myself.” you gasped softly your cheeks dusted pink and you reluctantly let go. He let his thumb linger before pulling it away. “I must go” he suddenly turned to leave and as you watched him walk away stunned you saw him walk oddly as if adjusting his pants.

Soon the party came to a close and you reunited with your family outside. Your mother and father were all red faced from dancing with each other so much and drinking the night away. You were still thinking of five and the thumb thing. You felt like you had screwed up by doing that. You felt like you fucked up a relationship that just started. You entered the carriage with your family. You caught a glimpse of Colin kissing a girls hand before coming towards you and the family and entering the carriage alongside you and the family. The carriage ride home was all laughter and talk of your experiences and the fun you had. You occasionally also spoke but your mind was mostly astray and far more interest in one singular person. Once home everybody ran to their rooms to undress and settle for the night or do what families do. You however were starved. You hadn’t eaten much at that ball. You entered the kitchen and looked into the pantries for something at-least adequate to snack upon. You ended up finding some biscuits your mother made just yesterday. You grabbed a few and munched upon them with some milk. You eventually were done and headed to your room. You sat at the vanity table and looked at yourself. Your hair had stayed up the night despite your fun and you looked a little sweaty but that didn’t necessarily bother you. You Got undressed tearing your bodice away and dress off. You went to your wardrobe picking your night gown and as you do so you cant help but for your thoughts to run to five’s touch. his hand on your waist, what would it feel like against bare skin if it affected you this much through just a layer of clothes. You swallowed tried to push those thoughts away. You threw on your night gown and just in time your father came in as you laid down in bed “Hey there, y/n?” you smiled and sat up “Hi father whats wrong?” he chuckled “Nothings wrong. I just came to ask how was the dance my little treasure chest?” you smiled softly at the affectionate term he has had for you since you were little “It was not as bad as i thought it would be.” he chuckled and and took your hand giving it a gentle reassuring squeeze “See i told you it wouldn’t be that bad. You just had to have a little faith.” he leaned forward kissing your forehead “Goodnight, my treasure chest” you smiled up at him “Goodnight father” he smiled and left your room closing the door behind himself. You smiled and laid back in bed. You decided to set your worries aside and let that be future you’s problem for now. You just hoped it wouldn’t come to bite you in the ass. You looked out your window and you let your eye’s droop into a sleep. Today’s events soon slipping away as you slipped into a world of dreams.

In the morning you awoke to the smell of eggs being made and the sweet nectar of fruits being my cut. You exited your room your hair tousled and loose. You entered the dining room and sat at the table as you and your mother and father waited for the girls to awaken. your mother smiled over at you “Hello darling, early up i see. i expected you to be asleep still at this hour especially after all that fun” you smiled at her sleepily and lazily “Yeah but you know me mother i enjoy breakfast” she nodded and handed a plate “Well in that case i have your breakfast here” you smiled a little more eagerly and took the plate with a thank you and began to eat. father soon came inside with a letter and as he dis Trisha came in ready for breakfast. Father said “We got a letter from the Hargreeves manor. it must be-“ Trisha snatched it in excitement “It must be from Diego! i danced with him the other night he must be calling for me!” you chuckled and rolled your eyes softly “Trisha you honestly believe he is calling for you right now? Is he dying in a bed waiting for you?” Trisha gave a playful scoff and stuck her tongue out at you and looked back at the letter and opened it up. your father sighed smiling and shaking his head softly at her excitement but his face turned to concern when her’s dropped “Something wrong, Trish?” Trisha handed the letter to your father and he cleared his throat and pulled out his reading glasses perching them on his nose. Just then Maggie entered the room just in time to hear the results. “Dear L/N family, We Hargreeves officially invite you to the Hargreeves manor for a feast. We would be honored to have your company signed….” everybody waited patiently as father paused in confusion. Maggie curiously spoke up “Well what? who signed it?” mother went to father and held his shoulders and looked at the letter he turned it to her so she could see “Signed…Five Hargreeves” your eyes snapped up and went wide

Wait…Five Hargreeves?

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hi i hope you liked it! Please stay safe and happy. i love you ❤️

[yakumtsaki]

Spice and Cyan are the last cousin-fuckers left standing and are proving impossible to break up. I'm inclined to blame the fact Sugar and June also had the hots for each other and passed these destructive genes on to these losers but whatever it is they're just annoyingly into each other.

Now I'm not gonna lie, I did almost waver cause I was like 'man you know what they're second cousins so at the end of the day truly who cares, maybe I should just let them stay together and create one Union super-bebe'.. and then I see this:

In case you can't tell from this amazing screenshot they have ONE BOLT. ONE. ALL THIS DRAMA OVER ONE BOLT ARE YOU KIDDING ME

-What is drama compared to someone you almost desire? -Oh baby, the mediocrity of my passion for you is too much to bear!

-This lukewarm hot tub water is the perfect metaphor for our love.. -Exactly, it's the water of the womb and we all know that's where that sole bolt is even coming from!

UGH. Also man the difference between your noses is UNREAL, now I'm more worried about that if you procreate than the incest.

-Hahahaha, as expected I'm the only one of this trash family that's in a non-disgusting relationship!

Felina no offense but you could afford to add some drama cause you've become boring af.

-People are sick of all this perverted nonsense! They want someone dignified and happily monogamous!

Ya idk sis, I mean look at Barth dislocating his entire spine as we speak:

-I SENSE BETRAYAL AGAIN. WHO DARES CHEAT ON ME NOW

-JIMMY, BACK IN THE ARMS OF MY COUSIN THAT I RIGHTFULLY STOLE YOU FROM. AND TO THINK I WAS GONNA MARRY YOU WHEN I WON THE HEIRSHIP

-You were??

-OF COURSE NOT

Bro I can't, the entire house hates Barth other than Meadow and her billion nice points and Spice who is his childhood bestie. Note that he and Sunset have that goddamn amour fou and are independently becoming un-enemies, which I'm NOT GONNA LET HAPPEN.

-Ok Barth, let's get drunk and make some reckless and sexy decisions!

SUNSET GODDAMMIT IT

-Why do you keep cockblocking us? You know our kids would be hot!

I DONT CARE

-Ya right! Don't act like you haven't thought about it!

IM NOT LISTENING TO THIS

-You know we would produce a hot, psycho turbo-Union! A little Jojo or Jojette, untainted by non-Union DNA, one freakshow to rule them all!! Look into your heart, you know it to be true!!!

ENOUGH, STOP TRYING TO SEDUCE ME WITH THE PROMISE OF COMICALLY INSANE OFFSPRING, SUNSET. EVERYONE FUCK OFF TO BED RIGHT NOW, GOODNIGHT

-AND GOOD MORNING, LOSERS

WTF. Why are you here we've paid our bills!

-BUT YOU HAVEN'T PAID THE INCEST TAX

-OMG THERE'S A FIRE🌞

-OMG THE REPOMAN IS HERE TO TAKE OUR SHIT

-OMG THE STREAKER KILLED OUR FISH

What??

-I JUST DON'T WANNA ADMIT IM STILL CRYING OVER BARTHOLOMEW

NOOOO NOT OUR BEAR STATUE WE'VE HAD IT SINCE GENERATION 1! PLEASE JUST TAKE ONE OF THE KIDS INSTEAD

-YOU SHOULD HAVE PAID YOUR BILLS

WE FUCKING DID

-PLEASURE DOING BUSINESS WITH YOU FLOPS

FUCK YOU, REPOMAN, WE'RE NOT FLOPS

-WAAAAAAAAH I CAN'T BELIEVE HE TOOK OUR BEAR

Oh great, now half these flops are in aspiration failure, that's just what the doctor ordered.

-OMG AND NOW THE OTHER PLANT IS ON FIRE

BRO WTF IS HAPPENING WE'RE CURSED

-WE ARE AND WE ALL KNOW WHO'S TO BLAME

-HE'S BEEN BAD LUCK SINCE HE WAS BORN

-Can you harpies take this somewhere else, I'm trying to get high here!

-KILL HIM

OK NO. No one's killing anyone, we're NOT cursed, ok?

-We're broke, afflicted with a bills glitch, fires keep starting and half the house is in aspiration failure!

Well let's be real, the broke part is on you.

-US??

You idiots are averaging a D each semester because you're too busy fucking each other, beating each other up or both..

..I mean freaking Jimmy is on academic probation, I have never gotten this before in all the years I've played this game, this is the worst college run of all time.

-WHAT IS YOUR POINT

My point is the bar is in hell so let's just get out of this run alive, ok? Now you kids make nice!

-Well, Failina, now that I'm looking at you up close I guess putting lipstick on a pig does work sometimes.

-For my next move, I'll shove my queen in your other eyehole.

See, now isn't this nice? And I think I figured out what caused the bills thing so everything should be fine now..

-THINK AGAIN BITCH

OH FFS

-I'M HERE TO FREE THIS NEIGHBORHOOD FROM YOUR TERRIBLE SPOKEN WORD POETRY

Ok you know what I'm actually fine with that one, take it- Um do I hear hearts??

UH WHAT????

-THAT'S RIGHT IM IN LOVE WITH KEA FOR NO CLEAR REASON

WTF

-We've been friends for a long time-

You have?? Man I really need to pay more attention around here.

-Yes well you can't help being useless!

Very true! Well please, continue, let me just call someone over-

-YOU LEFT THE HOT TUB OF LUKEWARM LOVE TO CHEAT ON ME???

Man I know, it's so terrible! Anyway-

-HOW DARE YOU BE UPSET WITH ME FOR CHEATING ON YOU

CYAN WTF LOL

-YASSSS BEAT HIS ASS UP BABE HE DESERVES IT

DOES HE?? Cyan you are one crazy bitch, I love it.

-I take after my mom! :D

Which one, they're both insane! :D

-What's it take to get your number? What's it take to bring you home? Hurry up, it's time for supper, order up, I'm hot to go🎵

Alright well Chapell karaoke seals it, Kea, welcome to the family!

-You mean it this time right, you won't fuck me over again like when I was engaged to Sophito?

LOL I forgot about that but no I'm certain this one is gonna work out, unless crazy ass Cyan goes back to one of her cousins

-What?

I said start planning the wedding!

[jeridandridge]

For Lovers At Night part 5

My too much gene kicked in so there’s one more chapter of this fic coming. Enjoy! Previous chapter

The text puts a knife in her chest causing her to let out a sob, hand flying to her mouth to cover it. Getting up she walks with her phone in hand out the hall through the doors breaking down only when she’s outside. Letting the sob escape her throat she doesn’t care that it’s starting to drizzle. Taking several deep breaths she tries to stop crying long enough to call you. As the dial tone rings, Melissa feels like her heart is going to fly out of her chest and not in a good way.

“Hello?” A voice on the other end sighs.

“Hon, can we talk please? I need to talk to you.” Melissa’s voice wobbles as she speaks a mile a minute.

You’d never heard her sound like this, so small and unsure of herself in the time that you’ve known her.

“There’s a lot we have to talk about apparently.” You hum. “I need a bit of time, Melissa.”

“Time?” She asks quietly, “how much time?” She’s all but pleading with you at this point and she doesn’t care how she sounds. “I can’t lose you.” She whispers.

The line goes quiet for a moment until you speak again. “I need to gather my thoughts about everything. I think you owe me that much.”

“Okay,” Melissa takes a deep breath. “Just please don’t shut me out.”

“I’d never do that. I’m not an asshole, Melissa. I’m hurt and I need time. I’ll talk to you soon.”

The call ends and Melissa brings her hands to her face holding in a scream. In a matter of hours her entire life got flipped around in a way she never thought would happen. After a few more minutes outside Melissa breathes trying to calm herself to go back to her kids. Going back inside Abbott she cleans up her desk and tucks the card you sent into her purse before the tears start flowing again.

A couple blocks over you busy yourself cleaning up the store and bar in prep for the night ahead.

“you’ve been cleaning that same spot on the bar for ten minutes.” Your friend and colleague Jacob says coming up beside you.

“I’m- yeah,” you shake your head moving down the slab of granite. “My head is in the clouds.”

“And you don’t have that dopey lovesick smile on your face.” Jacob hums, “was it too soon for flowers?” He winces.

“Considering her husband posted on her Facebook for their anniversary last month, I’m gonna say yeah too soon,” You huff tossing the rag down with a sigh.

“Oh no,” Jacob lets out slow and full of pity.

“Don’t do that, dude. I dont need that right now okay? I need to get through this weekend and figure out what the hell to say to her.”

“How did this all happen?”

Looking at your friend with a sigh you slouch forward crossing your arms.

“I looked her up because she’s so mysterious ya know? I looked and she came up, still has old pictures of him and that damn post on her wall. I don’t know what to think at this point.” You shrug completely confused and hurt.

She definitely wasn’t lying about being with women before, that much you knew and the way she looked at you felt real. She looked at you like she loved you. Talking to her on the phone and hearing the sadness in her voice made you even more conflicted.

“You have feelings for her right?” He asks leaning against the bar.

“I’d be stupid not to wouldn’t I?” you scoff.

“Theres your answer. Hear her out and talk to her when you’re ready.” Jacob advises the only way he knows how.

Thinking about your friend’s words for the rest of the day, you go through the motions at work putting on your best fake smile as you greet and chat with customers. As you cater to your patrons your phone sits on your office desk buzzing with a text chain from Melissa you don’t see until much later.

When you get up to your apartment that night you get ready for bed shuffling over to the mattress feeling almost disgusted with yourself. You slept with a married woman and you had no idea if she was telling the truth or not about how she was treated by her husband. The post you saw online rubbed you the wrong way, you were still friends with enough people from your hometown to know what a bad relationship looks like yet you still didn’t know for sure.

Laying on your back you look at the ceiling with a sigh. Now or never, you grab your phone looking at the long string of texts you have from Melissa.

I know you said you needed time but I need you to know I meant everything I said to you. About my family, work, how I feel about you.

I know I fucked up and I’m so sorry. More sorry than you’ll ever know, Amore.

Please don’t push me away.

Dropping the phone onto your nightstand you turn over curling under your blankets wanting to sleep the day away. Only sleep doesn’t come. Tossing and turning with racing thoughts of the redhead you dissect every moment carefully from when you met up until you kissed her goodbye after your date and every single moment puts a ghost of a smile on your lips. Her still calling you ‘Amore’ in the texts made this even harder for you. Closing your eyes you listen to the raindrops hit your window and thunder rumble in the pitch dark.

At the same time, Melissa is overtired and wanting desperately to sleep but she can’t stop the tears or her thoughts from keeping her body awake. She’s never felt like this before in her entire adult life and she knows it’s her fault. She should have never lied in the first place and she sure as hell should have never let Kristen Marie put her on Facebook.

when Joe posted that message on her page it didn’t effect her, she already knew it was for the show he constantly put on for her family of being a good husband when they are all aware he is anything but. What she hadn’t known was he made it public, and now the thought of losing you and explaining everything to her family makes her chest ache.

The following day for you is strange. When you wake at your usual ten am, it takes everything in you not to grab your phone and send Melissa a good morning text as you’d come accustom to. Instead you lay there for a few minutes enjoying the sound of birds outside along with the usual traffic. Getting up and going about your morning proves difficult for you. Once ready for your day you check the time, realizing Melissa had her lunch break in less than two hours. Picking up the device with a sigh you send a quick message.

Can you meet me the cafe near Abbott during your lunch?

In a classroom not far away Melissa’s heart jumps when she sees her phone light up. Opening it immediately she feels hopeful reading the message, glad her students were in gym at that very moment. Not wanting to test her luck too much she replies with a simple yes I can then gets up practically jogging to Barbara’s classroom.

“Hey, I have to cancel our lunch plans today. She wants to meet at the cafe.” She can’t stop the smile from crossing her lips.

“Melissa, be careful with that woman.” Her best friend warns. “You still have to deal with all the legal proceedings with Joe and your mother.”

Melissa nods shoving her hands in her pockets. “I know, I know that. I just really need to see her Barb.” She shrugs with a small smile that doesn’t quite reach her eyes.

Barbara looks at her friend in astonishment. “You love this woman.” She comes to the realization. “Go on during lunch, you text me as soon as you get back here.” She points.

As Melissa’s break time approaches you walk the couple blocks to the cafe on the corner, wondering if you’d see her coming from the school from the window. Sitting there waiting you order a water trying to keep your cool while mindlessly scrolling on your phone. As you do you receive a text from Jacob.

Hear her out and remember she’s hurting too

Letting out a sigh you tuck the phone in your pocket. When you lift your head you’re met with the sound of the door chime and green eyes landing on you. Standing up at the table you don’t make a move, gesturing for Melissa to sit across from you.

“Hey,” you let out not breaking eye contact with the woman. Even dressed in her work clothes she was absolutely stunning. “You look as tired as I feel.

“Yeah,” Melissa takes a seat wanting so badly to hug you. “I didn’t really sleep.”

“That makes two of us,” you nod pushing one of the two coffees in front of you forward.

Melissa looks at you with a grateful not picking up the drink. Just how she likes it she thinks.

“So uh, I’ve never had to do this before.” You shrug not sure where to start.

“And I’m not good with the whole feelings thing.” Melissa adds playing with the corner of a napkin. “I know you owe me nothing, but let me explain everything?” She asks softly.

While you were upset, an explanation is exactly what you wanted. Nodding, you urge her to go on.

Taking a breath the redhead fiddles with the napkin between her fingers. “What I told you about him, everything is true. The cheating, the lying, the not caring, it’s all true. We were young and stupid when we got married, and he didn’t wanna miss out on being one of the guys.” She shrugs taking a breath.

“You’re not gonna tell me you two have kids are you?”

“No,” Melissa shakes her head immediately. “No kids, just an overbearing family on my side.” She chuckles. “In fact, my brother and cousins threatened to kill him after they found out he cheated on me the first time.”

Letting out a puff of laughter you shrug. “Can’t blame them. It’s the Italian-American way.”

Melissa ducks her head with a small smile, eyes going to the paper. “Yeah. And I ain’t saying I’m a saint, I cheated when I was a teenager but as an adult? Never did. My marriage started out fine, but a few years in he got sloppy with hiding it. I never cared enough to ask for a divorce because growing up my mother made a big deal about marriage but anyway,” She shrugs it off not wanting to get emotional. “I didn’t think any of it mattered and I wasn’t good enough for anyone else so why go through the hassle?”

Looking over the woman’s features you see a mixture of sadness and pleading in her eyes as she nibbles her bottom lip.

“What changed?” You ask quietly resting your hand on the table almost touching the redheads.

“you made me feel like a woman that was desirable and worth talking to.”

“Melissa, I can’t mess around with a married woman.” You sigh shaking your head. “I meant what I said in that card, I-“ before you can finish your sentence Melissa hits you with another bomb.

“I asked Joe for a divorce.”

Sitting stunned you just blink at her for a moment.

“He was there at the school when those flowers were delivered. Which are beautiful by the way.” The redhead gives a shy smile.

“Well fuck.” You sit back in shock taking in the information.

“Hon, It was the best thing that coulda happened to me, I finally told him how miserable I was and that’s what I needed to do,” Her eyes water, the dam about to break again as her voice turns to a whisper. “And you gave that to me even- even if that means I lose you.”

Extending your fingers you turn your hand, palm up to the redhead, your fingers entwining together a moment later. “You’re not gonna lose me, Mel. I just-“ you sigh, “I need to process everything and I bet you do too.” It had been a strange twenty four hours and you still couldn’t believe the woman you were in love with was still someone else’s wife.

Feeling the warmth and gentle squeeze from Melissa’s hand you lean forward slightly meeting her eyes. “Let’s take things slow, start over.” You suggest.

“I can do that.” The redhead nods. As long as she could keep you that’s all she cared about.

“Okay,” you give her a soft smile gently pulling away. The rest of your short time together comes easy, the awkwardness chipping away as you two sit and talk as you usually did.

Tapping the screen of her watch Melissa sighs knowing the forty five minutes she spent with you wasn’t long enough but would have to do for today.

“Back to the rugrats?” You ask knowing her lunch wasn’t very long.

“Yeah, Barb is getting ‘em from recess for me. I uh, thank you for talkin to me, hon.”

“I’d never ghost you or ignore you, Mel.” You shake your head leading her out the door of the cafe. “I really, really like you. I meant that. Now we can just pump the breaks a bit yeah? You and your family are going through a lot now.”

“Yeah,” Melissa lets out in a puff of laughter. “I can’t wait to be interrogated by my ma and Nana later at dinner.”

“In that case I’d say that’s punishment enough.” you chuckle putting your hands in your pockets, still a bit of space between you two as you stand there on the sidewalk. “Well, I’ll see you later, Mel.”

“Can- hon, can I have a hug?” She asks almost unsure of herself.

Unable to say no to the woman you step forward wrapping one arm around her shoulders and the other around her waist in a warm embrace. Closing your eyes you take in the feel of her body, her signature smell, how her hands feel playing with the back of your jacket.

“Thank you, Amore.” She whispers, most definitely needing the loving touch as much as you did. The redhead pulls back first, giving you that shy smile that has just the corner of her lips up slightly.

“I’ll see you soon.” You assure her, knowing that you really couldn’t stay away from her long, especially now.

In the Schemmenti household a weekly dinner happens at Nanas house, and this week was no different except when Melissa pulls up with a large tray of ziti she only sees her parent’s car in the driveway. Coming into the house with the tray she smells food cooking and her nana talking, that was a good sign.

“Is a hit happening?” She pokes her head into the kitchen.

“My mia Cara!”

Maria Schemmenti crosses the kitchen going right to her granddaughter kissing her cheeks and taking the tray from her. “Come sit, food is almost done.”

Even though she’s up in years the oldest redhead that Melissa took after the most in looks and actions moves swiftly going back to her many dishes on the stove.

“Hey kiddo, you okay?” Johnny Schemmenti was a no nonsense guy, always ready to jump into action for his family especially his mini me Melissa. Sharing the same green eyes the two hug and Johnny places a kiss to his daughter’s head.

“Ya know what dad? I’m better than I’ve ever been.” She smiles moving to sit back down with her dad. “Ma looks pissed.” She says quietly watching the blonde woman move around the kitchen.

“Hi, ma.” The youngest redhead calls out getting no reaction from the woman.

“Melissa I will speak to you when I’m done helping your nana.”

“Caterina don’t give that girl the cold shoulder.” Nana points at her.

“That’s okay, Nana. I’m the only one here so apparently I’m in for an ambush. Did you put the hole in the backyard, Ma or is it somewhere else?”

Johnny has to bite back a laugh hiding his proud smirk with his beer bottle.

“Melissa this isn’t an ambush. I’m only wondering why you had to cause a scene instead of telling us you weren’t happy.”

“Mi stai prendendo per il culo,” Melissa huffs.

“Melissa Ann!” Caterina snaps.

“If this is how dinners gonna go tonight I’m outta here. I don’t need all this. Nana, dad, I’m sorry I’ll see you on Sunday.” She gets up kissing her dad’s cheek, grabbing her purse as she goes.

“Sit back down, Tesoro. Your mother means well but she ain’t going about it the right way.” Maria shoots her daughter in law a look that gets a huff from the blonde.

Melissa listens to her Nana, sitting back down next to her dad. Elbows on the table she covers her face with her hands taking a breath feeling like she’s a little kid that was caught and is now getting in trouble.

“Look you wanna know what happened? Joe cheated on me for years, did ya know that? That weekend the guys had the cops called on them and I had to sweet talk the cop? Yeah, they were ready to kill him. We done here now?” Melissa lets out with a challenging look to her mother.

That night almost ten years ago had been a rough one. A bunch of the cousins rented a house in the Poconos and the long weekend in the summer heat ended with Joe taking off on a four wheeler and Johnny Junior having his hand stitched up in the cabins kitchen after a drunk Joe made a joke about another woman he was seeing. Junior and the cousins scared him good, eventually the cops came ruining the weekend for Melissa.

“The boys knew this whole time?” Caterina asks quietly.

“Of course they did. So did Barb, and Nana.” She nods to her grandmother taking a breath.

Melissa’s mother looks at the oldest woman with an agape mouth.

“Mel, we want you to be happy. You happy with splitting from Joe?” Johnny asks his daughter.

“I can’t put into words how happy I am, pops.” She shrugs with a small smile.

“See, Cat? That’s all I need to know.” He nods to his wife, getting up to get the plates for the table.

“At your wedding I knew he was no good.” Maria shakes her head. “The negativity sheds off of him like his hair does.”

Melissa chuckles staying put as her parents move about the kitchen setting the table. As they do, Maria comes over kissing the top of her head.

“Mia Cara, when we’re done you make a plate and take it to your new friend. Give her a sneak peek of family dinners.”

The redhead looks at the matriarch of the family with a warm smile knowing her Nana would understand everything that Joe told the family.

As Melissa has dinner with her family you move around your apartment cleaning up and ordering groceries as you usually do on your days off. Seeing Melissa that afternoon was nice and you knew as soon as you saw her the anger you felt would lessen. You were upset but not so much with her. Now you were upset with her husband and how he treats her.

If her being free of him and the cage she felt trapped in meant you had to feel bad for those few hours from finding out to the moment you met up with her for lunch then so be it. You were tempted to text her an invite to come over for the night to decompress and talk more. As you leave your apartment and hop down the stairs to the alleyway out back to get rid of your garbage you see a car you do not recognize parked almost blocking the alley, and a man getting out of the car.

A man you recognize as Joe.

Final chapter

[mrsoftthoughts]

Just Some of my headcanons of the Di Angelo(s) in the 30's

(that honestly are pretty delusional but sometimes i just want to think of them as a happy family before the Washington DC event and the lotus casino ok??)

- Maria is the oldest sister of the 3 daughters of the marchese Stéfano Di angelo and her father little gem as the only daughter of his first "marriage" (*Cof* *cof* daughterofVenusMariadiAngelo *Cof*)

- Hades proposed and married Maria because no fucking way that he let a woman of her status being judged for having a long term relationship without a ring and even less having kids with her out of wedlock ( in fact the ring was what make that Persephone don't like Maria, she couldn't care less if only she stayed as her husband girlfriend, i may explain this in another post some day)

- Hades was there for Bianca and Nico while they grow up, living with them during the spring and summer and being always looking up for them in some way during winter , they really got to be a family, Family vacations around Europe, little and silly baking days, Nico and bianca trying to convince the house personal to helping them to spy their parents dates, that kind of things

-Alecto has been the kids babysitter and bodyguard since they were born, her job is just slay anything that it dares to try attack them, even in hades presence in order to him doesn't get distracted from the family activities

-Stéfano really loves his Son-in-law, for him is the son that he never had, he doesn't know that hades is a god, but he's concius that just like his lover he is something non human and that his grand kids are also especial like his daughter, but he doesn't seem in hades the intention of letting behind Maria like Venus do it to him, and Hades is probably the only man wealthy enough and with enough class to be of his liking for his little princess, so he isn't complaining

-And don't make him talk about his grandchilds, because you're gonna be stuck hearing him talk of them for hours, Bianca and Nico are the first since that maria is the only one of his daughters in age to have kids and he couldn't be more happy when the nurses anounced that Nico was a Boy, he may be a girls father but he really wanted a male from his blood, and sice he didn't get a son he was rejoicing for his grandson he really spoiled those little things

- Nico and bianca were homeschooled and The family end up getting the reputation of being "really hard" towards the personal tutors of Bianca and Nico, actually they just dont tolerate the bullshit of entitled people calling their kids stupid or lazy because they couldn't read right lenguajes that weren't romances or Greek... Needs to say, they fired a lot a people until they find people that really were disposed to teach the kids and not just screaming at them ,Even getting people that weren't from Italy for that because their kids only would have the best and would be treated with the respect that they deserved

- Bianca plays the piano, Nico the violin, I'm not elaborating, just trust me

- in fact their music instructors end up being zagreus and macaria, they were introduced to everyone except Maria and the kids as hades cousins because there isn't a logic and no controversial way to say that the full grown adults over there are his children

-Bianca used to have a Best friend, she lived in Switzerland so they only could see each other every once in a while when one of them was allowed to stay with the other for a time, the last thing that the girl know about bianca is that she moved to the US and then... Well, we know what happened there ( in some place in Switzerland there's and old lady that still concerned about what happened to her friend)

[badgalsasuke]

sometimes when i see the type of sns stans that are insecure because of, like canon ships or because the writing of romance in sns is not explicit enough i wonder if this is their first exposure to queercoding or implicit queer text in media/literature. or if they're straight and they dont understand that comphet, heteronormativity, and censorship in media exists especially for such a large popular mainstream audience such as naruto. wake up people. the song "a part of your world" from ariel is written by a heartbroken closeted gay man after the man he loves gets married to a woman. the song "reflection" from mulan is very trans coded. george michael's last christmas is also about gay pining but it wasn't common knowledge back in the 80s because of closetting. recently with wicked movie coming out more people are also finding out the queer nature of gelphie's writing in the og broadway.

i saw a post from sns talking about how "if this were reality they'd be together but this is a homophobic manga" and it's... almost like the reality of homophobia irl translates to how the manga ending has to be written. almost like how in reality, in a conservative society lavender marriage is still a common practice that many closeted queer people has to adhere to because of the burden of familial and societal expectations. i also don't like the sns stans that thinks these things doesn't exists in the manga universe when, like, most of the people and the villages practices traditional conservatism when it comes to social customs and norms, the heteronormative nuclear family model is strongly upheld and applauded. there are also those who says these things doesn't affect sns (as characters) because they're strong and they wouldn't care what people think when like.. naruto especially has been shown to care deeply for societal acceptance, has been given expectations to marry a girl by his family, guilttripped into dating by his peers, is literally the hokage so ofc there's more pressure to set up a role model behavior, etc. sasuke is a character who cares less about conforming and we don't see much on how he came to be married but even from the bits we've been shown in gaiden, the nature of the barely-there marriage, the existing rejection, neglect, lies, and deceit in it, and the shady conceival of sarada is still reflective of those loveless only-staying-for-the-kid types of marriage we see irl where the spouses have nothing in common except the kid and one parent especially felt repulsive and dread towards the other parent. sakura's pursuit of him was invasive, aggressive, and one sided and sasuke was also guilttripped into acepting her by those who thinks they have his best interest. I admit that the SS situation is a more unique case than NH who is a typical comphet relationship. But still, it says so much about how a union/marriage that you didn't really want and a selfishness to hide your true intention to keep things the way they are instead of confronting the problem head-on, will lead to more neglect and dysfunctionality.

when i read how intense and devoted sns are to each other in their youth through all of the manga only to end the series by randomly getting married in their old age to someone else of the opposite gender they barely liked, it strikes me as something familiar. cause this is a common phenomena me and my fellow closeted gay and lesbian friends in my country has seen, felt, experienced, or feared through the situations and circumstances that we are dealing with. the only reason people kept saying the (homophobic) slogan of "being gay is a phase" is only because so many gay people were forcibly put through horrible corrective measures, either violently or through forced assimilations and arranged unions and other horrible methods.

if one ship something gay and cant even grasp how heteronormativity is a thing and just how deep that system can go, let alone how it significantly affects irl gay people in a conservative society, then i truly despise these types of shippers. they think because naruto and sasuke married a girl and have a child then they MUST love the girl. forced marriage doesn't make sense for these two cause they're strong or whatever.

Hi anon!

I also feel that way regarding a big part of SNS shippers, I feel that's why a lot of them go "I don't hate NH" or "I like Sakura but-" and so on, they're not really confident in the ship and always try to appease het!shippers. But yeah, to me it's definitely because they don't have enough knowledge on queer art and history that so much of Naruto and Sasuke's writing just totally flies over their heads.

i saw a post from sns talking about how "if this were reality they'd be together but this is a homophobic manga"

SO MANY SNS SHIPPERS SAY THIS! and I don't get it, they're always saying that the manga or Kishimoto are homophobic and I don't get from where the fuck they get that like???? I've seen people say that Kishimoto made Naruto and Sasuke accidentally gay because he's a bad writer that can't write romance and doesn't know what he's doing but there's this other section that says he accidentally made them gay because he's actually homophobic and they can never explain why or how they arrived to the conclusion that Kishimoto is a homophobe. To me his work shows he's the opposite of that.

Everytime those people try to explain how Kishimoto is aCtUaLly homophobic they always end up spewing very racist and xenophobic shit, like he has to be a homophobe because he's Japanese like huh? "oh well it's because Japan it's conservative and their laws aren't lgbt friendly" well, I'm Mexican and Mexico is a very conservative country and it's still full of gays and lgbt allies, unless you're just a racist piece of shit that labels everything that doesn't suit you as bigoted.

For het!shippers to say the manga/Kishimoto is homophobic is one thing, but for SNS shippers to say it is like stfu, you're just annoying and dumb.

they think because naruto and sasuke married a girl and have a child then they MUST love the girl.

Oh yeah, this type of SNS shippers are so annoying, like don't they know what lavender marriages are, don't they wonder why Naruto and Sasuke look so miserable when they're around their wives? like omg use your brain

[mintaikk]

Why Stolas likes Blitzø

(Continuation of this post. Tldr ar the end bcuz this is long.)

Yes, Ik how they first saw each other after 25 years. Yes, ik it could have started as lust that turned into love. Yes, it's an escape from his shitty marriage. Yes, it's probably Stolas loving sterotypical romance tropes. BUT, I think that there's more than meets the eye.

(Also, when I talk about Stolas meeting Blitzø, assume it's after the 25 years unless I specify it's when they were kids)

I think Stolas likes Blitzø for how different he is than what he's seen in his life. Blitzø is loud, outgoing, confident, and just an overall gremlin. He also doesn't hide his negative traits. He's rude and literally just screams about how much he dislikes something. He's not afraid to tell people to shut it when he's sick of them. Compare that to Stolas's life, where he just learns to internalize shit and accept life as it is while following all these weird-ass royalty standards.

And listen. In my "Why Blitzø Likes Stolas" post, I said that a major reason that Blitzø likes him is because he's dramatic and wears his heart on his sleeve. But that's Stolas when he's with the people he cares about, like Blitzø and Octavia. In his regular life, Stolas is a reserved, quiet introvert who's used to other Goetia's shitting on him all the time. Before he met Blitzø, he just took people's shit and was awkward when it came to voicing what he wanted (he literally stuttered 😭). And then, he met Blitzø, who was loud and confident and came across as not caring what people thought (we know he cares a bit bcuz he looked self conscious when in the room with other Goetia's, but Stolas didn't know that). And he was really forward with what he wanted as well, which Stolas never even considered that he was allowed to do. Going back to when he was a child (bcuz this shit always starts when your young and stupid), Stolas literally cried when he realized he was going to marry Stella, and instead of Paimon listening to him to see why, he just distracted him by taking him to The Circus. Distracting your saddness and anger with other things, amiright? This is how alcohol addictions start, gang). This just shows how Blitzø being really confident and forward was just- not something Stolas was used to in his life!

Stolas probably likes how rude Blitzø is as well, if that makes sense. Like I said, Stolas grew up in royalty, and being polite is a huge thing, but being polite can just turn into being a doormat. And, I'm sure all Blitzø lovers noticed this, but he's litterally so rude. Like, he's a secret softy, but he's rude. He screams at Moxxie whenever he gets. He plays loud music and badly sings along with his employees in the car. Stolas litterally heard Blitzø insult Moxxie just because he could (S2 Episode 2, Seeing Stars). And yes, this is a negative trait, but I still think Stolas likes it a bit bcuz, let's be real here, he was a fucking doormat, and he admires Blitzø for just openly being rude.

Edit: One person pointed out that the reason Stolas responds positively to Blitzø's rudeness and insults but negatively to Stella's is because Stella means to be awful while Blitzø insults him out of love (Truth Seekers as evidence)

They also both have a weird fucked up sense of humor. Stolas is the only one to laugh at Blitzø's joke at the Circus when talking about the "gross worm horse," because it was scientifically correct (I love this guy), and he's the only one to laugh at his jokes in Seeing Stars, despite them being incredibly violent ("And then that BITCH *something something, I don't remeber the exact quote and i dont feel like checking* SHATTERED HER SKULL! There was Blood everywhere!"), and Stolas is laughing like it's the funniest thing he's heard because there probably WAS blood everywhere! And let's be real here, laughing at his jokes is a BIG sign that someone likes someone in media.

Okay, imma bring this up. Yes, Stolas had a crush on Blitzø when they were kids. Yes it was cute. Yes, his blushing was adorable. BUT, kids have crushes differently than teenagers and adults. In elementary school, a girl I knew had a crush on a boy because he had a cool shirt. Stolas probably started having a crush on Blitzø because his doll was an imp, and Stolas was mostly raised by the imp butler, so he found comfort in imps. I wouldn't call that fetishization just yet, bcuz he was just a kid, but I just want to point it out. And while I do think this, I think he also started liking Blitzø as a kid because he thought he was funny and fun to hang out with.

Also, Blitzø is just- silly! He likes bad jokes. He sticks his tongue out when he's being a troll. He loves horses and draws them all the time- even drawing Stolas & Via as horses and giving it to Stolas as a gift (I'm not making this up, this was from Blitzø's twitch because he had that)

He makes goofy faces all the time. His eyes dilate when he's happy. He loves games. He follows the "Byeeeeee <3" trend in cartoons. He likes playing with stickers. He likes going to the park and playing with the horse toys 😭

And going back to the "He grew up in royalty thing where he had to fit rigid social standards," thing, all of this would just be cute quirks to Stolas bcuz he's not used to it! He admires Blitzø a lot just because of how much of himself he is!

Blitzø is also really brave (reckless depending on who you ask, but we're on Stolas's perspective here!). Blitzø, the lowest denizen of Hell, scaled the walls of a literal Goetia prince bcuz he wanted to fuck him (again, Stolas's perspective). His business is about going to Earth, something implied to be illlegal if you don't have permission from a higher up, to kill people. He's litterally an assassin and skilled in combat. And, if you haven't figured it out by now, a lot of crushes start by admiring the traits that you don't have (how we all confused gender envy with crushes, lmao). And while I'd argue that Stolas is pretty brave now (going full demon mode on Earth, still standing his ground when Striker was threatening him, "THAT WAS THE SOUND OF A FUCKING DIVORCE!"), he wasn't when he met Blitzø. I already talked about him being a doormat, so I won't talk about it again, but we all know how he was.

And, my favorite thing about romantic ships, ✨️The Connection✨️. Blitzø and Stolas spend a lot of time together on the Full Moon, and sometimes not even all the Full Moon. A basic thing of BDSM etiquette is after care and making sure your partner is okay. And, knowing Stolas's romantic heart, he probably fell harder during the aftercare, where they had to care for each other and talk about stuff. Honestly, I wish they showed the aftercare in the show bcuz I feel like it could add so much more context to their relationship. VIVZIE, PLEASE!

I've been keeping this mostly PG13, but yes, they are very sexually compatible, which Stolas has literally never felt until sleeping with Blitzø.

Blitzø is also just a very loving person. He doesn't wear his heart on his sleeve like Stolas, but when he likes something, he lets everyone know . He loves his daughter and is super affectionate with her. He loves his business and his employees, and he likes getting to know them and doing fun stuff with them (Harvest Moon festival). Like said before, he loves horses and draws them all the time and carries little horse toys with him everywhere. Like, THIS IS HIS FACE WHEN HIM AND STOLAS MADE HORSES OUT OF CANDLE WAX TOGETHER. It's so cute!

Stolas grew up litterally being told, "Excitement is unbecoming of a Goetia" (S2, episode 1, The Circus), and Blitzø is literally excited a bunch of the time. Honestly, I think it's really sweet that they both like each other for the emotion they show.

Oh! This too! Bryce Pinkham said that Blitzø is "someone that Stolas fan truly be himself around."

Stolas doesn't feel like he has to put an act on around Blitzø. Notice how he's a lot more open and theatrical around Blitzø, and he's not afraid to get dressed up (he never got dressed up for the Gortia parties other than his basic outfit, lol). He's goofy and flirty with him and acts really excited and affectionate and smiley and just- overall a lot more comfortable! Compare that to when he's with the other people, where he's more reserved and quiet ang goes along with whatever. Yes, The Goetia party, but that's with people he hated. Compare it to how he was when he was helping Ozzie. Yes, you could argue that he was nervous about the Asmodean crystal and Fizz, but it's still a noticeable change. He's quiet and seems stiffer than when he is with Blitzø.

(The only other person he is open with like he is with Blitzø is Via, and he also loves Via. Honestly, he's just a really outgoing person with the people he loves/feels comfortable around).

Idk what else to say. I've been typing this shot for 2 hours straight. Enjoy my weird Ted talk about a kinky owl demon. If you have anything you'd like to add, please tell me, I'd love to hear it!

Tldr; Stolas likes Blitzø because he's different than what he's used to, he's confident, he's himself, they both have a weird fucked up sense of humor, he's brave, he's silly, they have a connection past sex, they're very sexually compatible, Blitzø is a very loving snd passionate person, and Stolas can be himself around him.

Okay, extremely dumb thing that doesn't matter, but did you know Barn Owls are attracted to Barn Owls with a lot of spots? Please note that Blitzø's scars made him have a lot of spots around his body. This person also went over gay barn Owls courtship and its litterally how Stolas and Blitzø first slept together, I can't stand this show sometimes 😭

[hellsinvestigativereporter]

You know the further I analyze Millie's reactions to all of this the more I'm becoming convinced something is up about this pregnancy thats got her worried and it's not her job. Lest we forget my dear helluvians Millie comes from a big family and I dont think her fears about moxie finding out she's pregnant are because she's nervous about taking care of it or not being able to afford to. Worst comes to worst she could ask her family for help with the child as many large families do. Oh they (her parents) would be insufferable to be sure but having to deal with family shouldn't invoke the kind of panic she had when she found out she was with child. And moxie has shown that he's willing to put up with anything for the sake of his wife, as all good men do. So why the fear? I stand by my initial belief the child is not Moxie's but for the sake of peace let us analyze other potential reasons why she is so terrified.

It has been proposed that perhaps millie was pregnant before and the pregnancy did not end well, and as a result she's terrified of going through that again. Okay... maybe. But if so then that would suggest she and moxie talked about it because they are in fact a loving couple with healthy communication and would certainly have talked about, and taken precautions to, avoid a pregnancy were there still any difficulties both biological and psychological afflicting millie. Still, one glass of wine too many one night after dinner and maybe they just forgot to prepare properly before they got down to China town as folks used to say. That would be the best case scenario. And one most folks seem to assume because not many people want to even entertain the idea that this happily married couple could have relationship problems arise because their relationship is their emotional comfort food and the idea of that being ruined is too much for them.

Another possibility is Moxie may not have been comfortable with the idea of having children. Understandable as his father is even worse than stella. So perhaps the idea of him turning into his father were he to have a child of his own would make sense however... I don't see Moxie being so upset about fathering a child that he abandons millie, that's just not the sort of man Moxie is. Inspite of it all he clearly takes more after his mother and from what I can tell his mother was a very loving parent which means Moxie blowing up at millie for being pregnant in this scenario is... unlikely.

Getting back to the money side of things, them not making enough to support a child I will confess this has more credit than the other theories but it still has a ton of holes in it. First off she did not tell her husband she was pregnant first. She called her sister first... for advice. She diddnt go to moxie first and alert him right away that something was wrong or that they had a serious matter to discuss. Hell she had to affirm to him that she loved him with zero context and let's face it the phrase "you know I love you, right?" Is the sort of line most folks tell a loved one when they've really screwed up and that screw up is going to hurt them badly. But let's say its still just a case of being able to afford raising a child. The fact she hasn't told Moxie ANYTHING is still a giant red flag. Because if it is his child why all this cloak and dagger business? Why not pull him aside at the party and let him know? Why is she keeping him in the dark about a child he had a hand in fathering? If the child is his and she's terrified of telling him that would suggest something rather sinister wouldnt it? But we know the man, if anything having a child he could share his love of musicals with seems more the sort of reaction he'd have after vomiting from nervousness wouldnt it?

And yet.... he knows nothing. He's being told nothing. Two people know about this kid and he's not one of them. A discussion is being had about this kid and he's not being included in it. Why? The only conclusion that seems logical to me after assessing their personalities and analyzing the type of relationship that they have... is that the child is not his. And millie is terrified of him finding out and leaving her because let's face it no man will ever take news of infidelity well, no matter how open minded he may actually be (unless he's into voyerism but again that seems unlikely in moxies case and even then her getting pregnant would not be a surprise even if it were). All evidence points to something having happened that did not involve moxie.

Now I want to clarify I dont think millie had an affair, an affair is what happens when the heart is divided between two lovers and one of them is ignorant of the others existence. I dont see millie doing that. But... this is hell and bad habits are everywhere and one night at the wrong bar at the wrong time can do a lot of damage if your drunk enough... RIGHT BLITZ? And lest we forget millie told her sister that she messed up, not "we messed up".

I know a lot of people feel strongly about this but we must brace ourselves, dear readers, for the possibility that this marriage may be about to go through a very rough time and could possibly not survive. Hell... is not the kind of place that takes kindly to happiness. Because if it did, it wouldnt be hell anymore would it?

[moonshine-nightlight]

WIP Folder Ask Game

thanks at @snowkissedmonsters for the tag! i should be working or sleeping but i don't want to lol. gonna be tired anyways and i'd like to spend some time thinking about writing instead ^^

Gotta modify the game a little because i have so many story ideas and only going to put up title and a bit of info for 1) WIPs i have writing for, not just notes/outlines, 2) only in the monster romance genre, and 3) are for short stories/novellas because otherwise i'd still be typing out this post (i have a problem lol)

Avian Care - ReaderxF!Harpy. kinda my own creature but she's magic and she's got wings and is intimidating as all hell. seen as a rare, dangerous, cursed creature even though she's been helping. after a big battle she masically won for them, she's asked to leave and care for her wounds on her own so ppl dont freak out she's here. reader goes with her to help.

Bad Case of Loving You - M!Witch!ReaderxWerebear - witch accidentally love potions the whole town and the only one immune is his crush. i wonder why?

Bedwarmer - ReaderxF!Orc - mountain orc was awarded a small fief for her service in the war and asked if she wanted a bedwarmer. reader volunteered for the extra money. orc took it the title literally and is leaving both pining in The Only One Bed

Cat Goddess - ReaderxF!Diety - before the Big Fight, mysterious woman comes by the campfire and offers to help for a rpice, readers takes the offer and is now unkillable but has to random side quests for the cat diety whenever asked

Courtship Confusion - ReaderxM!Siren/Harpy - urban fantasy inspectors, friends to lovers, see masterpost for chaps 1 and 2

Darren's an Asshole - from the POV of a monster under your bed and the neglected children they end up taking care of. eventually pairing with two of the kids mom who didn't realize how shit her BIL was at babysitting lol

Feral - ReaderxF!Hellhound - the house left to you has some strange rules, but it was a free house. everything was pretty normal til the ominous dog kept showing up.

Fortune - Dragon!ReaderxF!Human- modern fantasy, the human you hired to be the financial consultant on your hoard is so good at her job and you gets so jealous about her hypothetically advising another dragon that you propose and double down when she's tries to giv u an out

Free Piano: Haunted - ReaderxM!Ghost, you pick up a piano to restore for your kid, it comes with a seventeenth century pissed off ghost

Goddaughter - ReaderxM!Demon - after being kidnapped by ur estranged father's supernatural enemies your neighbor shows up to rescue you and your daughter, because apparently your dad made a deal for your daughters soul before you were even born. and to think u'd had a crush on him before this

Of Lions and Lambs - ReaderXF!Werewolf - A/O. powerful werewolves made it a law that humans compatible with mating with werwolves were to be married off to restore populations after the War and you'd been successfully not getting tested for years until someone tests and reveals it you are one of those compatible humans at the worst possible moment. ur best friends steps in because surprise she's a werewolf to save u from creep!werewolf (and u've been pining after her for years) guess u gotta get married now.

Quid Pro Quo - ReaderxM!Demon - you're helping a demon figure out the fraud in his demon company and he's helping you figure out a loophole to get ur kids out of a deal your ex's corupt family made

Runalong - ReaderxGN!Runalong - the creature you used to imagine running alongside your car as you moved all over the place for ur parents jobs starts appearing to you as your travel as an adult.

Seen - ReaderxF!Demon - as you get to know a supernatural ally you see more and more of their true form. its not until you mention you can see their wings that they realize how close you've gotten.

So Close (Yet So Far Away) - M!ReaderxM!Werewolf - your friend's overprotective brother offers to let you two stay with him during an internship you both got and he can't seem to tell that you aren't interested in her. also the siblings are both werewolves but know the other is due to Circumstances

Kidnapped Musician - ReaderxM!Orc - based on the story about Fats Waller. in 1920s ur kidnapped by secret supernatural mafia but just cuz the boss loves your music. you have a wild multiple day party with the gang and come away with a special connection to one of the right hand guys to the boss

Minotaur Heir - ReaderxM!Minotaur - after the kings oldest human son leads you on and then humilitatingly leaves you for another, you decide to get your revenege. turns out his dad locked his minotaur son away in the labrynth but didnt actually disinherit him. you decide to marry him and take the kingdom for urselves

Postman PI - ReaderxF!EldritchEntity - rural area postal worker, mysterious packages addressed vaguely, friendship as they get to know one another. who gave this being access to the internet?

Rules: make a new post with the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous and tag as many people as you have WIPs. People send an ask with the title that most intrigues them, then you post a snippet or tell them something about it!

I actually think @snowkissedmonsters tagged everyone i'd tag (and idk enough ppl to tag according to the rules) so anyone who wants to share their wips, consider urself tagged lol

thanks again!

[feudalmerengue]

I was too bored last night and decided to torture myself watching yashajime.

and i thought: well i hate yashajime too much but i dont even remember half of the stuff that happened so why not revisit it

oh man ... it is actually that bad

under the cut my review of the first 3 eps

The first ep is good. Its the animated epilogue of Inuyasha, and you can tell that was written by Rumiko.

The character interactions are beautiful. All of them act accordantly to all the grow and maturity they had at the end of the series, its never a step back on the character development and i appreciate it. Miroku never touches someone else's butt, Inuyasha and Kagome dont get into a stupid fight and they actually talk abt their problems, and over all you can tell everyone has grown up to this point.

i haven't read the manga version of the epilogue so idk if this actually happened (bc i wouldnt be surprised if Sunrise decided to include this just for drama) but there's a lot of mentions of Kikyo and she feels like a hunting ghost all throughout the ep and i personally dont like that they still involve her even after all the time that has pasted since her death. yes she was one of the most important characters and we wouldnt have Inuyasha without her but cant she just rest in peace?

so this becomes a small problem between Inuyasha and Kagome. Inuyasha feels uncomfortable w the mention of her and is scared that Kagome will get mad at him for getting Kikyo involved on this, Kagome feels that Inuyasha is hiding stuff from her and just wants him to trust her a little more. and i think its more than normal that the whole Kikyo situation still a little taboo between them but i rlly liked that none of them felt insecure abt their relationship bc of this

And our favorite married couple resolves this TALKING. THEY USE WORDS AND COMMUNICATE AND SOLVE THE PROBLEM. NO YELLING. NO MAKING EACH OTHER FEEL BAD. NO ABUSE OF THE SIT COMMAND (well there is a sit that is just there to check the box but its not even Kagome yelling at him or anything. it feels more like "alright on the script says 'u have to sit Inuyasha at least once in the ep' so lets just get it done")

u can tell that Rumiko cooked in there.

Look at them they were born for each other <3333

And thats it. thats the best yashajime is going to get.

Eps 2 and 3 are just the introduction to the protagonist and introduction to the conflicts??? but its more like a bunch of information they r trying to force down ur throat. the only conflict i actually care abt is wtf happened to their parents

on those two eps they introduce us with 8 different conflicts (yes i counted them) not including all the new characters. IN TWO EPS. I SWEAR TO GOD I DIDNT REMEBER HALF OF THAT AT THE END OF THE EP, I HAD TO GO BACK AND WATCH SOME PARTS AGAIN BC IT WAS TOO MUCH

and i get that this series is going to be way shorter than Inuyasha, therefore they need to introduce everything quicker, but Sunrise that was a little too much.

Honestly i would have preferred that they didnt animate the epilogue if that was going to give them more time to present us the characters.

which leads me to my second point THE FUCKING CHARACTES. there is not a single one of them that i like (not even my baby girl Moroha)

Towa: I have the most problems with her. U are telling me that she is having a hard time in the modern era bc she is a hanyo and she is always getting into fights, fights that she is actively picking on, and she cant use her powers. but those problems (im sorry if this sounds bad) look like nothing to me. She is the one getting in trouble and she decides to get into those fights. its not like Inuyasha where we see him being bullied for doing nothing, just bc he looked and was different. and this is something that also bothers me, i dont see a reason why towa would get bullied theres nothing on her appearance that would indicate she is not human. no ear no nothing different, the white hair will just make her one of the cool kids.

Now her powers, OH MY FUCKING GOD SUNRISE WTF IS WRONG W U

u r telling me that she never had the necessity to actually use her powers and all that she did was jump fences and punch bad guys AND SHE IS ABLE TO CREATE A SWORD OF HER OWN USING HER YOUKAI ENERGY ?!?!?!

yes she is the daughter of the great lord Sesshomaru but NOT EVEN HIM WAS ABLE TO DO THAT UNTIL THE END OF THE SERIES. HE GETS BAKUSAIGA AFTER CENTURIES OF USING HIS POWERS AND TOWA WHO ONLY JUMPED FENCES CAN DO IT. not even Setsuna who has an actual training and does use her powers can do that.

Setsuna: she is just a copy paste of Sesshomaru, she doesnt have her own personality.

Moroha: Sunrise writers asked chat gpt "inuyasha's personality" and they got something like "inmature, impulsive, cocky" and just went w it but up to 100.

Yes Sunrise even though she is covered in red from head to toe i can definitely tell that she is Inuyasha's daughter no need to make her "female Inuyasha". Her entire personality is "more immature and childish Inuyasha", yes Inuyasha was immature and could be childish from time to time BUT NOT LIKE THIS. and not even the argument of " well she is younger and probably Inuyasha was like this when he was her age" can be used bc she is 14 and when Inuyasha was sealed to the tree he was 15. she grew up alone, in the Sengoku period where there was constante wars all the time, and she could even relate to the hanyos AND SHE IS THIS STUPID

Moroha is way better in the fanfics

Mei is insufferable, and u seriously r trying to convince my that Hisui and Kohaku dont know who Moroha and Setsuna r?

the only good things were the music, Kaoru Wada is simply a genius, and the character design which is pretty good.

but thats it. and genuinely tried to not be so harsh on it but its actually as bad as i remember it

also this

what the actual fuck

hate u Sunrise <3

[i-cant-sing]

Yandere Dimitri letting reader go to a hotel/her home after she requests him to let her have a few days to herself and well, Dimi can't say no to you because you really have been on your best behaviour after he had kidnapped you a year ago and forced you to marry him and shit.

He knows he can be a little overbearing, but you're seeing it all wrong! It's just his way of expressing his love for you :D

But nevertheless, you deserve a break. Besides you'll be safe with all his men-

"No guards." You tell him. "I don't want them scaring my friends away."

"Yes guards." Dimitri furrows his brows at you, before pushing your hair behind your ear. "You won't notice them. They'll be hidden-"

"How hidden can they be when theyre built like bears and have that intimidating look in their eyes?" You glared at him before sighing. Time to use that soft voice and damsel in distress eyes he falls for. "Come on, Dimi~ please. I just- I can't stand the feeling of eyes on me. Please. I promise I won't do anything to endanger myself. I'll even call you every few hours to update but please. No guards." You said, exasperation evident in your eyes.

Dimitri cupped your cheek, heart melting into a puddle when you leaned into it. You're so cute.

"Fine. But you call every hour. And if you get so much so as a paper cut, you are to tell me immediately- katyonak, stop laughing. I'm not kidding. I will burn that paper before bringing you back here."

Now while Dimitri did promise you that he won't have any guards accompany you, he didn't mean he won't have any hiding in the shadows. They're the best of the best, so there's no way you'll be able to see them at all-

"I TOLD YOU NO GUARDS, DIMITRI!" He winced at you screeching through the phone. Looking at your angry form through the cameras installed in your room, he couldn't help but still find you so attractive as your face turned red with rage.

So cute.

He cleared his throat. "I don't know what you are talking about, honey. I didn't send any guards. Oh no- do you feel like someone's watching you? Are you in danger? I'm coming to pick you-"

"DIMITRI!"

"Yes, katyonak?"

"Send.your.men.away."

Dimitri feigned innocence. "Again, sweetie. I don't know what you're talking about. There's no one there."

"Oh really? Are you sure about that?" You asked, and Dimitri could hear the threat that was about to follow. "Well, I guess it wouldn't matter if I pulled the drapes away and took off my clothes, huh?"

"Huh? Y/n, no dont do that-" Dimitri could only watch as you pulled the curtains away and began taking your clothes off. "Y/n! Dont do that!"

"Why not? No ones looking and I sure do miss walking around naked without you grabbing me with your paws. Oops, just undid my skirt and slip them off. And I'm not wearing anything underneath-"

Dimitri immeadiately grabbed his work phone. "GET YOUR ASSES AWAY FROM THAT APARTMENT! YOU BETTER NOT BE FUCKING STARING AT MY WIFE OF I SWEAR TO GOD I WILL PULL ALL OF YOUR EYES OUT AND FEED THEM TO YOU! IM GOING TO KILL ALL OF YOU-!" You smiled as you ended the call, not caring to hear the rest of his threats to those poor men.

You began getting ready for bed, finally at ease now that you didn't feel being watched. But the feeling returned about 20 minutes later, which freaked you out more because there were no windows in the room for someone to be peeping in.

So... who was watching you?

Turning to your other side, you screamed and almost punched the figure lying in your bed, but it caught your fist.

"Shhh, katyonak. Its me-" but Dimitri was cut off with a pillow hitting his face.

"What the hell are you doing here?!" You yelled at him, snatching your wrist away from his hand, but it only prompted to Dimitri pulling your whole body against himself.

"I missed you." He pouted, puckering his lips for a kiss but you smacked his lips back.

"After a day?!"

"Yeah. And then you said that you were taking your clothes off and well- I don't wanna miss a strip tease by you."

"You get enough strip teases at home, Dimitri. Go away, I don't wanna be near you for a week- you promised me that you would let me have a break for 7 days!"

"Yes. Not 7 nights. So, I'll be here to cuddle you and eat you out for 7 nights-"

"Stop being a perv, Dimitri!" You punched his back lightly, but he only snuggled closer to you. Eventually, you relaxed in his arms. He might be a jerk, but he's warm and not that you'd ever admit it, but you do sleep better when he hugs you.

"Y/n?"

"What?"

"When you said you missed walking around naked, you know you could do it at our home?"

"Dimitri, shut up."

"And i love you too, katyonak." He said, and you felt him kiss your forehead.

[sinimake]

MK1 is such a bizarre experience bc on one hand some characters have benefited a lot from the "universe reset" (Baraka, Reptile, even arguably Shao who is less than a muahahaha conquer villain but someone who actually seems to care about his realm?). Others kind of raise interesting questions, like Shang Tsung : is he doomed to be bad or can he be good for a change? (In the story he choses to become a snake-oil salesman before joining the imperial family + there is an Union of Light Shang Tsung so him being good is a thing that could happen).

But then, instead of using that full reset NRS just leaves some things the same? Like. It's a reset. In 2023/2023. That was the perfect moment for implementing some (maybe not lots) changes. Perhaps starting making Johnny canonically bi? Just a small ripple towards a bigger change? Instead of getting stuck in same old ways?

YOW EXACTLY

Things i loved about Mk1 change:

Mileena and Kitana sibling relationship

Rain's character design

Tanya and Mileena!!!!

Sindel being badass empress and outworld thriving in peace under her reign

Baraka and Syzoth on the good side!!

Kenshi's yakuza past

Geras and Liu Kang's friendship! Liu Kang actually treating Geras as his equal 🥺 and Geras being so loyal to him 😫😭

Shang Tsung's zitsy behavior

Lin Kuei brothers 🥺

What i hate:

Hanzo being a kid and essentially everything about him being handed to Kuai Liang

Kung Lao being the second best again

Raiden and Kitana romance

Mileena and Tanya having the barest screen time

Controversial opinionated rant down below

I hated that they essentially just switched Liu Kang and Raiden's places. I started MK1 right after MK11 that i was furious to see Raiden chosen as the champion (IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN MY BOY KUNG LAO LET HIM SHINE ISTG) and then flirting with Kitana with Liu Kang's exact line (I hope we meet again under different circumstances)??? Tf??

I understand that some plot elements are too good to change but character romances? Don't replace one side of the pairing, then try to serve it to the audience again! Reboot should give us more variety of character designs, stories, dynamics, and relationships. Give us the genderbent, queer, poc characters BC YOU'RE NOT EVEN SACRIFICING ANYTHING when we literally have infinite alternative timelines you can recall classics from. For example, we have our human Raiden and old man titan Raiden. We can do variety. I wanna see female Fujin, i wanna see Scorpion Harumi and fighter Suchin, i want actual deserved queer representation in Kung Jin, and i. wanna. see. canon Johnshi!

My hypothesis is that NRS is gonna bring in mk children through dimensional travel so that they don't need to age up our current characters. I'm saying this to push my point further that we don't need to repeat romance plotlines (dont come at me. I have bais just as you have bais for ur fav old pairings)

Listen, i loved Sonya and Johnny in previous games, her and Cassie were a huge part of Johnny's character arc, but since Johnny is already maturing by the end of mk1, i don't see a point in Cageblade anymore (very controversial but it's my blog so i will yap as much as i want) We are not erasing anything by possibly making Johnny queer. Johnny and Sonya can be married in different timeline and Cassie is still their child. If anything, we are enriching the character, expanding the universe. Really, I don't wanna buy the exact same game story in different graphics. I don't want to see Suchin die again just to serve Kenshi and Takeda's dynamic.

And don't even get me started again on heteronormality of the game. We have 6 realms that have diverse variety of biological and sociological configurations AND YOU'RE TELLING ME THEY ARE ALL HETEROSEXUAL?? NRS is a fucking pussy for not having enough queer representation. They think they can give us vague "blink, you will miss it" moments and move on. There are so many high selling good games with good lgbtq characters. Literal 2023's the game of the year, BG3 is so fucking gay that it's off to space and you're telling me that NRS is just going 🥺👉👈 but our fans 🥺👉👈

Anyways, NRS can eat shit and Johnshi for the president 🤘

[weirdmageddon]

since hes open to feedback im considering talking to james roach about giving jade the justice she deserves after her narrative shafting in act 6 and one-dimensional ooc-ness (and also being a plot device deprived of agency) in the epilogues. if i do im probably going to link to this post……

so james if i sent this to you and you’re reading this, hi! :)

you say, “i want you to know if youre having problems with the story you can come to me with it and i will hear you out”. first of all you are such a good dude and have such a good open honest approach to the fans. i need to get that out there, because i know you’re just as much a fan of these characters and world are we are. secondly, i don’t know what your plans for homestuck beyond canon are, but dave and jade’s poor handling is a problem in both homestuck canon (act 6, even act 5 fucking them over with “tell, don’t show”; see the latter half of section 1 of the post at > Dave: Deploy cloning apparatus. and section 2) and post-canon that has yet to be addressed.

i understand the nuances of making things flow in a story; things that have already been established can’t be simply retconned. i wrote this post knowing that in mind and hopefully working around that into believably timed and justified/needed arcs gives it more potential

jade is a character i care about so much, and many fans also. her dynamic with dave was one of my favorites but the resolution to their separation…is not even really a resolution. it’s hard to talk about one without the other since theyve always been narratively intertwined. or at least jade has

remember how they musically collaborated more than the other kids? (crystalanthemums is their surprisingly tender song dont forget. i saw that the weird troll grub versions of objects make a comeback in the upd8; make music a relevant part of homestuck in-universe again too </3) dave sending her sbahj furry poster in the mail? the first ones to use a collaborative fraymotif in the comic? kringlefucker and conksuck boot? literally collaborating on creating the right seed for the new universe? and then dave died in jade’s arms and they were separated for 3 years and then that never gets touched on because of the retcon and all the other endgame shit going on (and lets be real grimbark jade from before the retcon wasn’t a satisfying reunion either). we get like, a brief exchange of dialogue at the very very end that made you want to see MORE of them after the battle but it. doesnt happen.

and then in the epilogues jade gets warped into this oddly hypersexual ooc one-dimensional character meant to narratively get in the way of davekat and it’s so awkward and uncomfortable for them. and even THEN in meat timeline gets her agency revoked by the narrative with alt calliope. and in candy dave realizes he’s gay (i thought he was explicitly bi? didnt he call jane hot multiple times both pre-and post-retcon, and once call roxy a “choice babe” in pajamas before he knew it was his ectomom?? if you’re actually gay and in denial why would you have these subconscious freudian blunders). and being married to jade gnaws at him because of it which is. unsatisfying i guess and isn’t consistent with dave’s established sexuality…and then he dies leaving his probably concerned wife and becomes a robot. even if the “point” is that the epilogues are metanarrative commentary about storytelling and candy represents the kind of fanfic that goes off the rails with fanservice it doesn’t feel good when i still care about these characters and their established canons. and a lot of people are in the same camp as me regarding this. it’s still an uncomfortable resolution for their relationship

i really want to see jade’s arc overcoming being used as a puppet by the narrative and the space aspect. just some things to think about / consider that have been running through my head: she’s a witch, right? isn’t what she’s supposed to do is actively bend the rules of her aspect? feferi bended the rules of life by asking the horrorterrors to create dream bubbles so the deceased could still sort of “live” which had a massive narrative impact. who exactly determines that being spacebound means you are fated to be passive and alone? the author? alt calliope? how do we know alt calliope can be trusted or if she’s just projecting her experiences as the most passive class possible onto jade, who ironically has an active manipulation class but is forced to be passive for some reason? normal calliope wasn’t right about everything classpect-related either.

ultimately these things are up to you. you’re still the director of course. but i’m speaking to you, as equally caring of these characters as you and everyone on the team, as a hypothetical suggestion or just something to consider for a jade arc: i think it would do such good to jade and the comic as a whole to see her speak to the manager and recognize the power she has and take back the reigns over her own life and dignity. jade is MAD that she had her own possibilities for socialization and agency taken away from her. and with floralmarsupial, my beloved mutual floral who i went to homestuck high together with, i KNOW the potential they possess to write a compelling arc for jade harley. i think everyone knows too lol floral is THE compelling deep jade harley fanwork big name fan. i dont know what we got to lose. with you guys in charge now, and with the last we see of jade in hs^2 (now hs:bc) fighting callie’s influence and advocating for her own agency, really the only way to go from here for jade is up. (assuming she doesn’t permadie of peanut but i doubt that’s going to happen since she’s one of the original kids and it wouldn’t be satisfying storytelling. and it’s homestuck)

this statement so ripe with potential to me ^ and we’re left on a cliffhanger with jade going in this direction

i want jade and dave to be close friends who care about each other a lot and do silly stuff together again. this isn’t even a call to make davejade canon; it doesnt have to be romantic—i dont want a davekat davejade war to break out, you know? i know you’re trying to balance fan demands. but i just loved their dynamic a lot and i MISS it so much, homestuck act 6 didnt give us this and i wish their reunion had more that went into it. we’re past that point though

i want jade and dave to have a talk that’s like old times. something that isn’t awkward as hell or about sexual relations or drama or whos fucking who. just something for the two of them. something that grounds them in what made homestuck so compelling in the first place: character and friendships and these kind of interactions

i want to see them collaborate again. an idea i have is maybe they start a band or something since they’re both musically talented and also live together so they can make stuff together in person now. you’re a music guy you get it. tangle buddies. jam buddies

and maybe something more serious that concerns just the two of them. post-retcon dave never talked to jade about his thoughts when they fought bec noir right? knowing that jade would inevitably kill him with bullets through bec, but he couldnt warn her because he knows she wouldn’t go through with it, creating a doomed timeline? so jade thought all that time she killed him by accident…..what about all that guilt she must harbor? the first person she had in-person contact with since she was probably four years old, her best friend online, and accidentally killed him within just a few hours of meeting him? and never got to talk about it with him, let alone anyone, after three years? hello?? :(

these are the final lines of the last pesterlog between jade and dave before their 3-year separation (and basically all of act 6)

so uh…..this exchange really openly invites some kind of talk to take place even if it’s long overdue. among other things maybe. they need to hug or something. jade’s touch starvation is real, but not everything needs to be sexualized about touch. she’s lonely and starved of affection but i feel like it would be more meaningful if it wasn’t sexualized. just really basic platonic primal cloth mother needs. just like..both being human beings and having basic needs like this that jade’s been deprived of. who’s the person she would feel most comfortable going to? who does she have the richest history with throughout the webcomic? dave, right? her online best friend since childhood that always cared a lot about her? they have stuff to talk about

i feel like that would address the issue people had with jade’s out of left-field promiscuity in the epilogues and even leftovers of it in hs^2. not only do i think primal platonic touch starvation would be a more meaningful and evocative type of interaction to give them at some point, it wouldn’t rock the boat or create any ship drama (davekat has long since sailed and most people seem to be on board with it) and it would probably be really positive representation of these sorts of things which not only throws a bone to aroace people but just depicting this sort of thing normalizes the fact that two people can be close and not necessarily in an official relationship.

this is a good transition point to this post also which is basically an extension to this one. it’s exactly the issues i had. it’s on the nature of what they had going and how much they mean to each other but how the storytelling held them back when it was unnecessary

this breaks my heart. mr. roach and hs:bc writing team please i miss my favorite blorbo duo being happy in each other’s company. they were such good friends but circumstances pulled them apart. i miss when they created music together and talked about their interests and exchanged quips. i am such a well of ideas for stuff like this. show us how much they mean to each other again

if youre still reading this james thanks for hearing me out. if you wanna pass on to the writing team to look at and get their feedback on this i’d be so so thankful

“and to think that after all this he still chose to save her, like always, probably knowing he had little to no chance, just because he cares for her, her life and who she is beyond this moment, really meant a lot for them. i really, really was mad that this would be the last time they would truly ever be together in a way that to me mattered” — vintagegamebro