#i still don't know what stranger things is about

[running-with-toast]

The "sin of empathy"

The rejection of democracy. Socialism is a joke, communism is a threat, anarchism is unspeakable. These are ideas that cannot be entertained. Horizontal power demands cooperation. Empathy.

The fearmongering and appeals to disgust and implication of immediate personal threat. "Gang members are gonna come to Your house and make Your kid eat bugs! Are you gonna let them get away with that?!" The gut reaction overrides critical thinking. Action is demanded. Empathy is suppressed.

The demonization if the poor, the homeless, and drug addicts. Ignore them. They're dirty. It's probably their fault anyways. They're just looking for a handout they don't deserve. They aren't your problem.

The demonization of the stranger. Migrants, black people, jews. Outsider, infiltrator, dangerous, disgusting, inhuman.

The denigration of the queer as subversive, and the denigration of the feminine as shameful. Traits perceived as masculine, individualism, ruthlessness, inflexibility. Admirable. Traits perceived as feminine, vulnerability, compassion, empathy. Shameful.

The push to gut public education. Robbing families, isolating children from their peers, stunting their cognitive development and their ability to relate to others.

The spreading of illiteracy, leaving people unable to make informed choices or seek out new perspectives or navigate the world or do anything other than believe what they're told.

The spreading of conspiracies, sowing distrust of academics who might offer better explanations, or make the unfamiliar less scary, or encourage critical thinking, or make you question authority.

Demonization of cities as hellholes. Single family homes and uninhabitable suburbs. Fences and freeways. Camera doorbells and delivery apps. The fucking pandemic. Isolation.

Generative ai. It can make your art for you. It can talk to your family for you. It can be your friend. Talk to it. You don't have to talk to anyone anymore. Isolation.

And now, the sin of empathy. Stated plainly. A command to take a part of your mind, a fundamental building block of your personhood, and crush it.

It's always been about empathy. Everything they do. It's been their strategy for decades at least. They're trying to build a country of people with unshakable faith. People who won't bat an eye when protesters become prisoners and prisoners become slaves. People who will cheer for migrants in cages and foreigners under rubble. People without empathy.

I've been thinking about this a lot. I feel like I've discovered the missing piece, but I'm still struggling to synthesize it. I don't know what to do. How do we spark empathy in people who view it as a weakness? How do we teach people who experience challenges to their world view as a test of faith? How do we free people from a conman they have pledged undying loyalty to? How do we rescue a whole country from a cult?

The one thing I'm really scared of, the conclusion I don't want to reach, is that the supporters are just. Different. Fundamentally. Unable to feel empathy, unable to think for themselves, unable to be reasoned with, unable to be changed, unable to be saved, unable to be stopped. Because if that is true...

What other options are there?

[billionairebratenergy]

Forever Sounds Good

Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: Bucky Barnes had been called a lot of things in his lifetime—soldier, assassin, hero—but when you called him your husband, everything else ceased to exist.

───────────────────────────────

The compound was quieter than usual, save for the occasional hum of voices from the common area. You and Bucky had settled onto the couch, your legs draped over his lap as you scrolled through your phone, the warm glow of the TV casting soft shadows across the room. His vibranium fingers traced absentminded patterns along your calf, a subconscious habit whenever he was near you.

It was peaceful. Domestic, even.

And then Sam walked in.

"Hey, lovebirds. You two gonna join the rest of us for movie night, or are you too busy being disgustingly in love over here?"

You smirked, not looking up. "Bucky, what do you think?"

Bucky, who had been perfectly content in his own little world, blinked up at Sam like he hadn't heard a single word you just said.

You tilted your head, waiting for him to answer. When he didn’t, you sighed dramatically and turned to Sam. "Guess my husband and I will have to think about it."

Bucky stiffened beneath you.

The silence stretched, and you glanced back at him, only to find him staring at you. Wide-eyed. Lips parted slightly.

He wasn’t breathing.

"Buck?" you prompted.

Still nothing.

Sam, who had been in the middle of making some smart-ass remark, paused and squinted at Bucky. "You good, man?"

Bucky swallowed thickly, jaw tightening, but the color in his face betrayed him. His ears were turning pink.

And then—he grinned.

Not his usual smirk. Not the teasing, cocky one he gave Sam when they were bickering. Not the polite one he sometimes gave strangers out of courtesy. No—this was something different. Something real.

It was soft. Shy, almost.

Like you’d just given him something precious and he wasn’t quite sure what to do with it.

"Yeah," he said finally, voice rough, but there was a warmth in his eyes that made your stomach flip. "Yeah, I’m good."

Sam narrowed his eyes, looking between the two of you like he was missing something. But when Bucky made no move to elaborate, he just scoffed. "Weirdo."

As soon as Sam was gone, you turned back to Bucky.

"What was that?" you asked, amused.

Bucky shifted beneath you, avoiding your gaze. "What was what?"

"Oh, I don't know. You looking like I just told you I was carrying your child or something."

He huffed out a breath, shaking his head, but that small, secret smile never left his face.

"Just wasn’t expecting it, is all," he murmured, almost to himself.

"Expecting what?"

His thumb brushed over your knee absentmindedly. "You calling me that."

Husband.

You bit your lip. "Did you not like it?"

His head snapped up. "No—God, no. I—I mean, it just caught me off guard."

You watched him for a moment, the way he fidgeted slightly, the way his grip on your leg tightened just a fraction.

"You’re still thinking about it, aren’t you?" you teased.

"Absolutely."

The way he admitted it so easily made your heart swell.

You leaned forward, resting your forehead against his. "Should I say it more often?"

His breath hitched.

He closed his eyes for a brief second, then exhaled, a little shaky. "You tryna kill me, doll?"

You grinned. "Not at all, husband."

His ears were definitely red now.

"Jesus," he muttered under his breath, but there was a kind of wonder in his expression that made you soften.

"Bucky Barnes," you whispered, brushing your nose against his. "Are you telling me you like the idea?"

His fingers curled around your wrist, holding you there.

"Wouldn’t mind it," he admitted.

It was quiet for a beat. Then:

"Wait, are you proposing right now?"

He laughed, the sound vibrating between you, and you couldn’t help but join in.

But later that night, as you lay tangled together beneath the covers, his fingers tracing over your ring finger absentmindedly, you wondered if maybe—just maybe—he was thinking about it just as much as you were.

⚝──⭒─⭑⚝──⭒─⭑⚝──⭒─⭑⚝──⭒─⭑⚝──⭒─⭑⚝──⭒

[fullfriendnerdclutch]

Rites: Valentine

Same-sex relationship is still illegal in my country and punishable with prison term, that's why me and my boyfriend always have to lay low in public and even also took some extra measures in private to ensure our safety. But, for Valentine's Day, we always did something special for the past 2 years and we absolutely planned to do it again this year. Last year it was two stereotypical American college football jocks, this year.....well, we wanted something different

We stumbled upon this opportunity during our research about moving out from our country and settle in an entirely different one. They helped people to relocate for short-term, like quick break from daily living, to long-term such as a complete change of life. Was it the alcohol or what that clouded our judgment back then, but we followed through the procedure back at that day from that shady website and found ourselves the following morning not next to each other and in a completely different country altogether. It was chaotic but we managed to found each other and have the best sex of our relationship to that date before all in a sudden ripped away from the two fine dadbod to return to our ordinary life when the time was up

This year, we're much more well-planned and prepared as we decided to go to Brazil to celebrate our 3rd Valentine together. Spotting that Valentine falls on Friday this year, we also requested a return back to our body by Sunday evening in our country timezone because we still need to go to work on Monday after all

"Ready?"

"Always. Directly DM me, okay?"

"Sure thing, babe,"

"Okay, good night,"

---

I know it's our third time doing this, but it's always giving me such chills to open my eyes and found myself to not be in bed but actually in the middle of doing something inside a completely different body. We did mention to the agency to land us inside fit, 21-35 years old age group Brazilian men, but the weight of it really only hit when you experienced it, and it's certainly true for this one because this guy I'm in is thick!

It's Friday morning here in Rio, and I'm inside this huge tatted hunk named Gonzalo, his buzzcut and overall style makes him look very intimidating but there's a charming side to this handsome stud that I know I won't be able to resist if he flashes his smile to me. A small dog on a leash that I held added another element of surprise because I'm terrified of dog and I really cannot touch dog but I think Gonzalo here has no problem with it, right? I quickly take a selfie of myself and directly send the picture to my boyfriend's Insta as Gonzalo's insta is accessible anyway. Ohhh....he's typing right away, so he logged in to his account already huh......I wonder how he looks like

"Morning, handsome stranger. Just finished with my morning run, I'm reeked. Name's Joao,"

Fuck me, he's looking like a snack! Gonzalo's memory is filled with women and these repeated names of Carla that appeared in a lot of the memory, a girlfriend of Gonzalo apparently, but sorry to that woman, boyfriend is not going to celebrate Valentine's Day with her this year. I started to add my own input to Gonzalo's mind and make this body heated for the snack that is Joao on my screen, as I type my reply stating my interest to come over to check out how reeked he is. This two dudes might not actually know each other, but we don't really care about all that because what mattered for now is the fact that my boyfriend is inside of that man and I want to give him the love and fucking he deserved for his Valentine's Day

Once I receive the detail of his apartment location and another sultry selfie of his already taking off his musky cap and sweaty tanktop, I'm headed his way with the dog coming along with me.

The temperature in Rio is not that different with our hometown, so I find no problem strutting around over here through the walkways to the apartment located around 25 minutes walk from Gonzalo's residence. The people is definitely a lot more diverse and wearing a much-more revealing clothes compared to my hometown, but really, my mind just wandered to the idea of my boyfriend inside that taut Brazilian twunk, probably still sweaty with almost no clothings on already waiting for me. The colors of the street, the sight and senses of a new city, everything becomes secondary as I can feel the throbbing meat is accustomed to its owner's gay thoughts and just ready to be released from its cotton prison.

When I finally ring the bell of his apartment unit, the door opened quickly to the sight I simply cannot resist. I instantly lunged at him for a kiss and before long, we're already stripped naked from all our clothings as we consummate our Brazilian outings right here in this apartment while the sun shines nicely on us and the neighbors clearly can see us fucking each other but not gonna call police on us

[lycheeloving]

Second chapter!! Happy Valentine's day <3

Bruce finds you at work and doesn't leave you alone.

< first chapter

The next day at work, it all feels like a fever dream. Did you really meet Bruce Wayne? And talk to him all night? You feel a bit nauseous just thinking about it, but you just remind yourself that you'll never see him again. Even if you did get along really well...

Whatever, you'll just daydream about kissing him in the moonlight, that's just as fun as the real thing, right? Not that you could compare it to the real thing,  you'd have to kiss someone at some point to know what it's like.

Maybe you should have kissed Bruce yesterday, he certainly seemed like he would have been ok with that, but that was probably just wishful thinking anyways. Oh well, too late now.

The bell that lets you know somebody entered the store rings and rips you out of your thoughts. Fuck. You hate when there's costumers, which is why you chose to work at the shittiest bookstore in Gotham. And are hiding in the back.

You're supposed to say something like "I'll be right with you!", but you're not going to do that. You hate talking loudly. Especially to strangers, especially when you can't even see them. But you never even say anything when you're out in the front and making direct eye contact with them, so whatever. You just hope they won't ask you for help with finding anything, just having to ring them up is bad enough...

Why do you have to get costumers at all? Fuck, you should really look for a job with less contact to people, but this is the best you've been able to find so far.

You reluctantly leave the safety of the back room, only to find a guy in an oversized hoodie and sunglasses absolutely beaming at you. Why is he looking at you like that? Should you know him?

Only when he takes the sunglasses off do you realize that it's Bruce. No way, how did he find you? You feel your palms getting sweaty.

"Finally! I found you! Do you know how hard it was to find this book store with the minimal description you gave me?" 

Not hard enough, apparently, considering that he was able to find you this soon. It hasn't even been a full day!

He's still smiling at you. "I've been to multiple book stores this morning! I'm so glad you told me you'd be working today, or I would have had to ask everyone if you're one of their coworkers!"

"Yeah, well, if I had wanted you to show up here, I would have given you more details, probably." You deadpan, hoping your voice isn't shaking.

He's not deterred, he just keeps talking as if you hadn't said anything: "Wanna get lunch with me? When's your break? We could go to that café around the corner that I saw on my way here!"

Is he not getting that you don't want him here? Well, you do want him here, but you don't. You want him to think you don't want him here so he'll leave before you can embarrass yourself.

"I can't leave for my break, I have to stay here. I'm the only one working right now, I can't just- just lock up and get something to eat." Your boss actually allowed you to do just that, but when you came back from doing it the first time, an angry costumer was waiting for you and yelled at you for 10 minutes about how it's rude to just close the store in the middle of the day. You don't want a repeat of that, so you started eating your lunch at work whenever there were no costumers. Which is almost always, luckily.

"I could go get you something and we can eat here! It doesn't seem like you get a lot of costumers so we won't even be disturbing anyone!" Why is he so persistent? Can't he go talk to some supermodel or something?

"I'm not hungry." You kind of are, actually.

"That's fine, we can just talk! I just wanted to spend some time with you. You know, I haven't clicked with anyone like this in a long time, I couldn't just let you go."

Wait, is he serious? Well, why else would he go through the effort of looking for you... But still, you can't quite believe it. Are you being pranked?

"You should go. What if costumers start showing up? I'm sure you don't want some weird fan to recognize you."

Bruce ignores what you say and stays. He talks to you for about half an hour, well, mostly he talks at you, until he has to leave because his lunch break is over. You just stand there, perplexed. Does he really want to hang out with you?

He returns the next day. And the next. And the next. Every day, always during his lunch break. It takes a few times until you stop trying to ignore him, a few more times until you start actually talking to him, and a few more times until you agree to eat lunch with him. Not go anywhere else, just eat your own lunch at the bookstore.

You can't stop yourself from trying to push him away a little bit, though.

You put down your fork. "You know, it's rude of you to keep visiting me at work, where I can't just leave. This is basically harassment."

"If you want me to go, I'll go. Just say so, and I'll never show up here again, I promise."

You don't want him to leave. Well, you do, because you don't want to get even more attached, but you don't, because, well, you're getting attached. You can't bring yourself to make him leave.

You huff and roll your eyes. "Whatever." You pick your fork back up and continue eating.

He tries to suppress a smile. Gross. He's so cute.

Whenever he catches you playing a silly game on your phone (which is basically every time he enters the store, as you love slacking off), he insists on befriending you on it if possible, so when you're not hanging out he'll send you a booster on your candy-crush-esque game, or play against you on a quiz app.

Sometimes he uses the chat option there to tell you to go to sleep when it's late and he catches you playing, even though he's obviously awake as well! Hypocrite. It makes you smile every time. 

One day while you're eating lunch together, a few months after he first showed up, he puts down his fork and says: "I think I need to make this more clear. I am interested in you romantically. I want to date you."

You almost spit out your lunch, but manage to swallow it without choking. "H- Wh- Huh? What?"

"We can just be friends, I'd love to be friends, we already are friends, in my opinion, but I would also love to date you. So if one day you decide that you want to date me, please let me know."

You already want to, but you will absolutely not be informing him of that, thanks. Asking for what you want? What are you, a well adjusted person? You blink owlishly at him instead of saying anything. That should suffice as a response, right? No, you should probably say something.

"...Look, even if I was interested in dating you—", which, again, you literally are, but why would you tell him that;

"—you're famous, and at some point it would come out that I was dating you, and the paparazzi would publish one single picture of me and I'd immediately panic so hard I would pass out and die. This—" You point your fork between the two of you. "—is already risky enough. Whatever this is, anyway."

Bruce, as always, chooses not to address the parts of what you were saying that were clearly your anxiety speaking and simply grins.

"So you do want to date me? It sounds to me like you're just looking for excuses. Don't worry, if I don't want anyone to know about you, noone will! People don't tend to recognize me when I'm not wearing a suit, especially in environments where they're not expecting me, so anywhere outside of my workplace and fancy parties. It's worked so far, hasn't it? Not a single person has recognized me here! Dating won't change that. So, if you do want to go on a date with me, just say the word. Please."

What word? Wait, he means that metaphorically, right? No, but seriously, what would you say, how would you say that without sounding totally weird?

"That's not what I was saying. At all. Stop misinterpreting me." You roll your eyes at him. He changes the topic, but he keeps smiling until he has to leave.

Lying awake that night, you think about what he said. Does he actually like you? Or is he just pretending, because he likes a challenge? Knew you'd be difficult to get close to, and he gets a kick from being someone's first relationship, kiss, everything, and then leaving them? You feel nauseous and you suddenly feel cold. How are you supposed to figure this out? You try to tell yourself that it's only your anxiety speaking, that Bruce is actually a nice person and wouldn't do that, but you can't quite convince yourself.

The next day, your way home after work (and after pretending your conversation with Bruce yesterday didn't happen, which luckily he played along with), you see something on the ground that reflects the light in a way that catches your eye.

What is that? It's kind of hidden behind a trash can.

You take a step closer, hoping it's not some kind of trap, but you can't think of a villain who would hide shiny things on the floor to kill civilians. At least not in that color, the Joker would make it colorful, and this object appears to be... black?

Oh, it's a Batarang! You've never seen one up close, but they can't be super rare with how often people online post about having found one, there's even one guy who collects them and has an entire wall plastered with them. Allegedly. People online are saying that most of them are probably replicas, but you can't tell, as you've never seen a real one. Until now.

That makes you think, just how many Batarangs does Batman have? More than enough if he let's random people keep them. You think about picking it up and taking it with you. It would be really cool to have a Batarang...

You reach out towards it, but stop right before you touch it. Is it stuck in the floor? Fuck, just how sharp are those things...?

Maybe you should leave it here, you'd just cut your hand open on it, trying to get it unstuck.

Plus, maybe Batman will find this one if you leave it here, and then re-use it! Reduce, re-use, recycle, Batman!

You leave it where you found it, after taking a few pictures of it as proof.

The next day, Bruce asks you if you did anything interesting yesterday, like he does every time he sees you. Usually you'd say no, but you did find that Batarang... Would Bruce care about that?

While you're contemplating, Bruce says: "You'd have said no by now if nothing had happened! Come on, please tell me?"

Fine! Whatever! You'll tell him, even if he'll probably think it's boring.

"Ok, so, on my way home yesterday... I found a Batarang. And, um, it got me thinking, well, first of all, how many of those does that guy have? If he's just leaving them lying around like that, right? Oh, and, it was so sharp, it was stuck in the floor, though I guess maybe that just means Batman is really strong? Either way, I thought he doesn't kill, right, but considering what he's working with it's a miracle no criminal has ended up dead yet, right?" You stop rambling, realizing that Bruce hasn't said anything yet. At least he appears to be amused.

"You have a lot of thoughts about Batman, huh?" He grins. "Yeah, he must have tons of those things, I've seen the posts. Did you take it with you?" He didn't respond to your killing thoughts... Oh well, you did give him a lot of information all at once.

"No, I didn't... But I thought about it! I mean, it seems like that's what everyone else is doing, but with it being stuck in the floor like that I was worried I would cut my hand open trying to get it unstuck! And with my luck there would have been germs or poison on it and my wound would have gotten infected, like, immediately, and I would have died. So I left it there for Batman to hopefully find again. I mean, he should probably be reusing the ones he already has, right? Reduce, reuse, recycle, I'm just helping Batman be more climate friendly!" There you go, rambling again.

Bruce seems almost too amused at all of this.

"Well, do you want it? I can come with you when your shift is over and help you get it unstuck, if you want. If nobody else has already taken it. I'm sure Batman won't mind. And if it ever comes out that he's not trying his best to be climate friendly, I'll personally go kick his ass, I promise."

"Uh. Um. You don't have to do that!"

"...Kick his ass or go get the batarang for you?"

"I meant getting the batarang, but also please don't fight Batman. He'd wipe the floor with you. No offense."

"Well, first of all, I think I'm just as strong as Batman-" You roll your eyes at him. Dork.

"And second of all, I don't have to get it for you, but I want to. Please let me?"

Ok. Fuck. Whatever. This is the first time you'll be seeing him outside of work, excluding your first meeting.

"Uh. Ok? I, um, my shift ends at 8."

"I'll pick you up in front of the store, then. It's a date!"

"Uh! No, well, yes, but, it- um-"

"I'm just teasing you." He winks at you. Winks! Is he trying to kill you? You turn your face towards your food so you don't have to look at him. Asshole. Stop being so hot.

Later, at 8, he's already waiting for you in front of the store while you're locking up.

"Ready to go?" He smiles.

"Uh, yeah! Sure!"

You start leading the way to where you found the batarang, talking about whatever comes to mind on the way.

Finally, about halfway on your way home, you reach the place where the batarang should be. You hope it's still there, but somebody else could have taken it. You push the trashcan it was behind to the side, and...

There it is!

"Look, it's still here!" You turn around to Bruce, smiling. He smiles back. You fight the urge to giggle or hide your face behind your hands, he needs to stop being so cute.

"Didn't you say it's stuck in the ground? Why wouldn't it be here anymore?"

"Uh, you said you'd help me get it out? Somebody else could have done the same thing!"

"Right. But they don't have my getting batarangs unstuck from the ground skills."

You roll your eyes. How often could Bruce have come in contact with a batarang? His only advantage compared to you is that he's stronger and not afraid of cutting his hand open. At least that's what you think.

You watch as he grabs the batarang and gets it unstuck in seconds. Seriously? It was that easy?

"Woah. I think I would have been able to do that myself, that looked super easy. Sorry to have made you come all this way..." Apparently it wasn't stuck in there as much as you thought? Even if a considerable part of it disappeared beneath the ground. Hm. Weird. Maybe there was a batarang shaped hole there before it landed there? Or Bruce is just a lot stronger than he looks.

"No, I'm glad I came along! I wouldn't have wanted you to cut yourself accidentally." He wraps the batarang in a piece of fabric. Some kind of rich people tissue, maybe.

"Let me carry it home for you?" He looks at you in a way that makes you melt a little bit. Ok, fine.

"Oh, uh, sure!" You did enjoy walking around with him. And not just because walking with someone in Gotham is safer than doing it alone.

"Also we could maybe order dinner? And eat together at your place?" And let him into your apartment that's not cleaned up? That looks shitty even when it is cleaned up?

"Don't push it."

"Or we could go somewhere? I'll pay, of course."

And absolutely embarrass yourself and make him never want to see you again and talk about you to journalists that you're a horrible person, which gets published in every newspaper ever so you have to move and change your name? Ok, maybe that was a bit dramatic.

Bruce can clearly see the anxiety on your face.

"It doesn't have to be a date, if you don't want that."

Be brave! Be brave! You can do this!

"Uh." You almost choke on your words. "And... if I do... want that...?"

You might actually pass out, this is horrible. If he doesn't respond in less than a second, your flight response is going to win and you'll run away. And quit your job, so he can't find you again.

"That would be wonderful! We can take it slow, ok? Absolutely no pressure to do anything you don't want to do whatsoever, I promise."

You nod, not feeling brave enough to say anything. Maybe those were your last words ever.

"So... Dinner at your place? As a date?"

You nod again. Shit, fuck. Are you actually going to date Bruce Wayne? What were you thinking? Wait, does going on one date even mean you're 'dating' him? What's the definition here?

You start walking again, leading Bruce to where you live. If he hates your apartment and leaves and you never see him again that's fine and you'll be able to handle it, right? But that won't happen, so calm down. But if it did happen, you'll be fine and ok and fine. It's fine! Oh fuck, what if you misunderstood him? Did he even mean dinner tonight? Are you embarrassing yourself by assuming he'll come with you right now?

Bruce walks right beside you and starts talking again.

"I'll order. What do you want?" While saying this, he puts an arm around your shoulder. You tense. Woah.

"You said you'd take it slow!" Look at that, you can talk again.

"Too much?" Yes. But also no. But yes. But no.

"I don't know! Maybe?" He takes his arm away and you can breathe again, but somehow at the same time you miss his warmth.

"Don't worry, I'll take it so slow. The slowest. You won't regret dating me, I promise. This'll be so much fun, you'll see." He smiles.

You don't know about that, but you do know that at the very least it'll be interesting. You hope he won't notice you looking up what the definition of dating is on your phone while he's ordering food later.

[kaonarvna]

I get this with my EDS quite a bit. I've had casual comments (that some could perceive as complaints—and I'm probably too neurodivergent to tell in the moment) that I'm "always talking about it" or it's "the only thing I talk about".

It's almost as though my day to day life as I know it is structured around caring for my EDS. It's almost as though EDS is in every single system of my body, in such a way that it's altered my brain. It's almost as though every system in my body being built just a little incorrectly leaves me perpetually symptomatic in a dozen areas. It's almost as though I'm doing first aid for injuries that'd be considered emergencies in normal bodies every day.

My disability is sometimes my personality, because every drop of fuel my body has is going towards managing me.

At work, after so many years of working with my current employer, I now have a PowerPoint about my body that I show new staff. It's part of my risk assessment that colleagues are "informed about my conditions". It's 12 text heavy slides (with a few images of different braces, tapes, splints, etc) slides covering my risk assessment, what my diagnoses mean, what's "normal", and how to react to my body. Most able bodied people will never have to do this. Most people will never have to sit down with someone you don't even know, and give them a presentation about the workings of your flesh.

There's one slide that says: "When in doubt, I am fine. My 'fine' is very different from yours. Do not presume I need your help. I don't. If I need help, I will ask for it. This is the only body I've ever lived in, I know how to take care of it."

Fortunately the PowerPoint has been very good at decreasing the frequency of repetitive questions about my body. I make sure the content is understood. Most people don't have to lay their insides bare for every stranger they expect to be around for a few hours per week.

I still get inappropriate questions sometimes. Most recently I had, "Is your skin stretchy like...everywhere?" (their tone indicated they were asking about my penis).

I refused to answer.

Having to talk about my body too much is part of my life. It's "normal" to me, "abnormal" to everyone else, and it's for my own safety. If I didn't dissect myself for every new stranger, I might have an even worse time than I already do.

People wonder why disabled people "make their disability their whole personality" when we live in a world where disabled people have to constantly explain themselves so they aren't judged and attacked.

[itsrlymine]

"i am gonna be so fr with y'all and give the tough love i wish i got at the beginning bc you literally have what you want as you read these words."

So everyone read this on your profile and still decided to bitch out on you in anons because they're losers in their own reality?? You literally told them how this blog is and they still read it, asked a dumb question, and then got upset. for all the people who are offended by ur posts, YOU ARENT ENTITLED!! THIS IS A LITERAL STRANGER DECIDING TO HELP YOU DON'T GET PISSED OFF WHEN THEY DO IT THE WAY THEY WANT! SHES NOT A PERSONAL COACH AND DOESNT NEED TO ACT A CERTAIN WAY TO YOUR LIKING!

I saw a stupid ass post that was like "Omg these bloggers saying they're giving "tough love" (we all know whos they talking ab) are just assholes because these people are people who are scared to manifest" So your telling me you're too scared to fucking ASSUME? bitch gtfo my face. "Oh god I need someone to sugarcoat everything about manifesting because I'm too scared to assume I have a fat ass"

Do you people realize how ridiculous that sounds? Anyways girl lmfao some of these anons aint shit. The loass community has gotten so fucking weird and toxic like and ur the only real one out there nowadays. urghh it makes my head hurt fr...

I don’t even know like😭😭 Reading is seriously essential. I wouldn’t say they are losers but they are definitely giving their power away when it’s not necessary. Like at all. Even though I’ve definitely called them losers before.

I don’t really care about how long it takes people to get what they want. Imagine getting mad bc im telling people they can just decide you have something instead of deciding to do a technique as a way like bro. Manifestation happens when you are aware of whatever you want being yours.

You can DECIDE manifestation is easy for you and it will be. You can DECIDE manifesting doesn’t take long and it won’t. You can DECIDE you have it now and you will!!

But if you don’t know who you are as consciousness, ofc you are gonna look to methods and anything outside of you to tell you it’s okay to have what you want. Reality is a mirror, not a remote control. You don’t have to press a button a thousand times to get one thing. You just change the channel once it’s done and boom, you’re seeing something new.

I don’t know. I guess it easier to spend time in the end of deciding whether or not you can get something than just having it😭😭😭

[yimpysdiner]

Ridiculously long analysis of Jimmy's dialogue (PART 2)

PART 1 HERE Continuing with the next section,

Mimicking?

The whole ordeal of Jimmy copying Curly's "yeah?" in speech has already been pointed out, but there's something else I wanted to look into. This section is gonna be relatively short but this interaction still sticks with me. It's fairly easy to miss as you can brush it off but given Jimmy often repeats words or phrases from those around him I find it interesting.

This interaction was so awkward that it has me thinking about it over and over so honestly this may be one big nothing burger and more so headcanon territory but hear me out.

Jimmy gets quiet here as either 1, he expects them all to die on that ship as he said before crashing it or 2, he's terrified of any sort of attention their whole ordeal may get if they survive. The awkward silence is only filled by him commenting on ladies. Daisuke is no stranger to talking about "beach babes" and as Swansea puts it, "thinking with his downstairs long-nose." Honestly, Jimmy is a scumbag and gross around women, but I don't think this is the sort of situation where he cares to be impressing any ladies. This reads to me as him trying to "fit in" with Daisuke in a way. The way he often mimics people and says things they'd relate to defuse situations and get on their good sides feels like a form of masking. I'm no professional, no idea what in specific this would be, but Jimmy strikes me as the kind of guy who finds it really difficult to positively navigate a lot of social situations, especially if he feels uneasy like he was here. This parts super rambly sorry, this is just something interesting about him to me, how he'll latch on to other people's personality traits and mirror them.

Lashing out

We all already know Jimmy's not a very stable guy, very small things irritate him, he has levels to his anger however.

His base line irritation is just little remarks like this, things that you would scratch your head at but they're small so you can't quite bring them up. It's not completely aggressive, but it's definitely not very friendly either

I won't shove all the same screenshots of him lashing out during the birthday party here, but there he only lashes out in front of everyone else when he's able to make it seem like he's in the right. He insults everyone to their faces, but he's able to pin all the blame on Curly, letting out his anger while also in some sort of way getting people on his "side." Here he's *already* sewing seeds of doubt about Curly into the other's mind, so his little plan to blame Curly for the crash later on only works out all the more in his favor.

Then there's moments like when he's giving Curly his pills. He isn't exactly yelling, more so going on with his angry, paranoid rambles. This of course is followed by the implication he beats Curly while feeding him his painkillers, physically taking out his anger on someone who can't fight back. Side note, the only times he ever gets physical is when they're in a position of being unable to fight back (drugging Swansea, the implied drugging of Anya, and of course when Curly is left defenseless.)

I believe this is the first instance of Jimmy actually full on yelling while having one of his tantrums, which is why I say his anger is written in levels. It's not all one flat base of him cussing like a sailor and screaming his head off, remembering this and *what* exactly makes him tick helps me when deciding how I should write him reacting to certain situations. There's other instances where he's clearly panicked and flustered, stuttering and rambling because of high stress situations such as when Daisuke is on the brink of death and it's all his fault, which we'll get to later.

Hopelessness

Something I noticed when going back through everything is Jimmy seems completely and utterly hopeless about everything in his life. It starts out in the cockpit scene, one of the very few times he's genuinely vulnerable.

This line initially just seems like Jimmy is some power tripping guy who likes being the right hand man to the Captain, which is entirely possible (and true, given how quick he is to assume the Captains role himself), but it leads me to suspect something else as well.

These are out of order, but I think like this is better demonstrates Jimmy has never really felt the sense of control over his life like he has until he got this gig with Curly. He feels comfortable like this, which is why Curly wanting to "throw it all away" in his eyes baffles him. I really wish the devs gave some insight to what Jimmy's life on Earth was, why *he* ran from it all to assume a position where he felt he was finally in the drivers seat.

When Jimmy is faced with the reality of what he's done, his first worry is when he gets back home, he'll be caged in the same position he was, back at square one with no control over his life, rotting in a prison. Even if he did get out, as he said, none of it will matter, not with an assault on his permanent record. Maybe he held onto hope that he and Curly would find something new to do, but because he made the choice to force himself on Anya, that'll never happen. His knee jerk reaction to that? Kill himself. Kill himself and take everyone down with him, because if he's not in control, he may as well be dead. "The Tulpar crew was never found."

Remorse

Jimmy isn't entirely uncaring for what he's done. He suffers delusions for each and every one of the people he fucked over, all except Anya. Instead, he sees visions of the child he created, the ever looming reminder of what he did, no matter how hard he tried to block out Anya from his mind, it will always, always haunt him. Him crying to Curly and pleading forgiveness from someone who can't properly give it to him anymore is already a sort of in your face scene, that and the scenes with the horse delusions.

I want to talk about Daisuke and Swansea actually, as he had a much more direct role in their ends. In his mind he can say, oh, Curly ran in and did that to himself, oh, Anya swallowed those pills and did that to herself. It's Daisuke and Swansea who show up more broadly as themselves in his delusions as he was the sole reason for their passing. As Daisuke is dying, he is incredibly distressed the entire time.

Daisuke being so prominent in his mind has always struck me as interesting, seeing him in the vent, a grave, in the graveyard, all the flowers, the real genuine panic when trying to fix what he did. He never wanted him to die, he obviously feels immense guilt in making him crawl through that vent.

As for Swansea, Swansea can read him like a book, and he lets Jimmy know exactly what he thinks of him before he's shot and killed. He appears in the graveyard with Jimmy, also leaving a lasting impact on Jimmy's psyche.

To say Jimmy feels nothing over what he's done, or that he wouldn't care about people dying or anything like that is wrong on so many levels when the entire last half of the game focuses on him having to literally fight his own demons. It all culminates into him saying he fixed everything, deluding himself into being a hero as some sort of final comfort to his broken mind before he offs himself, "saving" Curly after dismembering him as if that makes up for all his wrongdoings. Jimmy is so layered and interesting and human, and that's what makes him a fantastically written character. It's what allows you to see yourself in him and reflect, see those insecurities he harbors, those toxic traits he exhibits, every little ugly part of him meant to be a mirror to your own actions. Denying him his humanity and making him an emotionless, aggressive, constantly angry person strips him of everything he's meant to be.

Sorry for the huuuuge yapsesh, but I thought going over these would be fun, it also helps me keep my characterization of him as accurate as I can possibly make it. If you have any thoughts let me know!!! I am very very invested in him and I love to hear what others think of him, even if I may agree or disagree.

[3lliesan]

"Move."

Time.

Yuu didn't have much time.

They realized this after the Dwaf's Mines, the running, the fight, and the trip back from Crowley's office. Ever since that black ink sunk beneath their skin, there was no way to stop it from slowly killing them even faster unless they somehow found a way to release it.

Even before all of that, Yuu knew that their 'heart' was weak. Not having as much strength as when 'she' lived.

Yuu was almost fine with just being invisible. A passing wind, that a few would notice, and forget just as quickly when they're gone. That would leave less pain and bitter tastes...

...

But...

That feeling.

The running with a purpose to achieve something.

The trust in each of their hearts to continue living.

Going against the odds even if things seemed hopeless.

The victory.

A glimpse of any color will do. Just as it did back then.

drip. drip. drip

ba-dump. ba-dump.

There were drums in Yuu's ears right now. No. Heartbeats. Everyone was doing their best to keep themselves alive and find ways to do damage to the Blot creature behind the bloody red queen, and a close friend of one of the people involved.

[Doodle Suit] can only hold out for so long, about half the people fighting were only first-year students, and that incompetent excuse of a headmage was probably too busy to hurry up and get reinforcements to arrive.

Though, most importantly..

"...fuck--!"

Yuu was currently having a problem of their own right now.

Riddle's spear pierced their arm, pinning it to the ground.

And it took a lot of effort for them not to scream.

It stung more than any ordinary arrow. Like a parasite, it was eating away at their limb. Flesh dying black the more time passes. The ones that noticed wanted to help, shouting out in concern, but unable to do much since they needed to focus on fighting for their lives, with Yuu, the one leading the whole thing down.

Is this really it? This was how I'm going to die? What can I even do if Trey uses his unique magic? I doubt it'd lessen enough damage for anything to be done. Am I going to see the fight til' the end at least..?

Sounds went back and forth like a broken record. Yuu tried to block out the entire world with the sound of their heartbeat.

bam. bam. bam. bam.

bam. bam. bam. bam..

Is there really nothing that can be done? Come on, think! Anything!

---

"There's ghosts in the mines?!"

"You've got to be kidding-"

---

"What, you a chicken or something?"

"Who are you calling a chicken, huh?!"

"idiots- do you want to live through this or not?!"

---

"Here's the plan..."

---

"I don't know how we're still alive! Hah- haha!"

"... Bahaha-"

---

--

-

"Oi, Yuu- or should I call you prefect now~?"

"Say that again and I'll show you a demonstration with the word, defenestration." Yuu retorted without hesitation. It was still too early in the morning, they hadn't had coffee in two days, and being addressed formally never failed to weird them out.

"...You look like a pretty guy, but you're freaking scary, you know that?" Now what is that supposed to mean?

Ace sighed, making himself right at home on the previously dusty sofa. "Anyway, as I was saying. I've been wanting to ask this for a while."

"What's up with that sword? You've been keeping that thing with you since the entrance ceremony, and it's not even in good condition."

Ah, right. You've been bringing that broken blade around in its sheath. Now that both Ace and Deuce know that it's only half a sword, that makes it seem even stranger.

"What, is it a family relic? Ya trying to look cool or something?"

"That's.. uh..."

... Well, it's not like Yuu could say anything about it being the one thing tied to their past or something. The atmosphere would turn weird.

---

.

.

.

Yuu's eyes locked right at the unsheathed red blade, in its usual purplish glow during battle. Ever since Yuu figured out how to convert blot to magic power in small amounts, they thought that they'd never need to use the same weapon again from the previous world.

tick. tock.

They pushed their body up with their left arm the best they could, ignoring the pain from the other side.

tick. tock.

Their vision getting blurry, crawled with any remaining strength they had.

drip. drip.

There was no time to have any fantasies of an miracle to appear, nor was there any time to drown in the despair of the current reality.

. . .

. . .

The muscles were begging to stop. The fight was still ongoing. Sounds of running, dodging, clashing, and casting was heard.

There were also an air of anxiety, tense, unnerving feeling in the air.

Along with fatigue.

...

Oh, right.

I'm tired.

Taking a small nap should be fine, right?-

No, I would definitely pass out, or worse..

Give up.. then what would all that be for..?

Why am I... even trying...

----+----

"W-We did it?"

There was a moment of silence as the three tried to process what had just happened.. If the dead monster on the ground was an indication of anything.

"We won..."

"Hooray!"

"We did it!!!"

...

what is it?

Was it because we won? We survived it together? Was it the thrill?

As Yuu started having strange thoughts, they stared at their friends for a while, broken weapons loosely held, still dazed... but not from the same thing as the two boys, too happy to notice how uncharacteristic it was.

Yuu couldn't pinpoint it in a few simple words to brush it off as something cliche. No matter how many literary works they could find to somehow find a way to describe it, it wouldn't feel right...

And for the first time. Yuu wasn't sure if they wanted to figure it out whether it was a good or bad thing.

...

'I want more of it.'

----+----

"...Damnit!"

Reaching out to the purplish hue, so close yet so far, nameless continued ignoring the pitch black crawling up their skin.

drip. drip.

"Just a little... more..!"

Crawling up the neck, pulse dimming bit by bit, soon syncing with the booming of the chest.

drip. drip.

"Move."

A glimpse was all that was needed. Even if You became one with the abyss. A single strand of color in a monochrome plane was enough.

So.

Drip. Tap.

"Move, damnit!"

As soon as Yuu clenched the weapon...

-BOOM!

"...Eh? The attacks..."

"They're all dissolving and gathering towards one place...?!"

So I may or may have not decided to dump any ideas here as practice until I get back on ao3 since something is better than nothing... haha- Yea, this is brain vomit. Please do the same whenever you read what I make THANK YOU! :DDDD

(P.S: Could you tell that this is one of the few times I'm describing atmosphere and feelings? It's so complicated. And I'm going cry :'D)

@twisted-drawritings @karmicpunishment @mellosdrawings

[inkieflame]

how's lizzie dealing with her new situation in your lab au? what's she doing in her freetime, whos she friends with, anyone she avoids, etc?

(no pressure btw)

Content warning: implied repeated SA

Lizzie spends her "good days" pretending that she's still home, indulging in a delusion. She mostly hangs out with Joel and Jimmy, or she sits in the Practice Room doing various activities (The Practice Room is a space where subjects can exercise their various skills to make sure they don't get worse from underuse. They have things like workout equipment, cooking equipment, artisan equipment, and computers) She has memory problems, and has introduced herself to subjects several times in one day before. The only people she seems to remember are people that she knew before she came to the lab (Joel and Jimmy were the closest to her, but she also knew Scott and Oli)

On the "bad days" she's more self aware. She lays around in Joel's bed, or clings to him. She talks about how much she missed him while he was gone. She talks about how she wants to go home. She misses Meri. She's sorry she let the Watchers take her wedding ring (it was taken from her forcefully. She didn't have a choice)

Lizzie is not often rented out, but when she is, she tends to be very compliant. The Watchers have sometimes bribed her with permission to redye her hair, and that's enough to get her to do almost anything.

Her favorite renter is a man in a city about an hour away who likes the way she paints. He is in charge of keeping uptown clean and pretty, and he has her paint these massive murals across buildings and walls. These murals take several days to do, and he buys a hotel room for a week. According to the Watcher's policy, none of the subjects can be left alone for extended periods of time, so he stays in the room with her. Every few months he will rent her again and have her paint something new. Lizzie spends those weeks painting outside, and it's enjoyable. It's an escape. The Watchers can taste the dread on her when she eventually has to return.

But not everyone is that nice.

Some people take her to hotel rooms for other reasons. She has no wedding ring and she's too small to fight back. What can she do?

When she comes back to the facility, crying, Joel takes her silently to his room, red rage for the Watchers burning in his eyes. He lays helps her on his bed, and he works her into a clean new change of clothes. He gets an ice pack from the kitchen, presses it carefully against the red marks on her neck and chest. Eventually they subside.

She clings to his shirt, sobbing apologies, as though any of this was her fault.

She calls it cheating.

Joel calls it assault.

Gem is no stranger to comforting Lizzie. She's been in that place too. Not everyone is kind, she knows first hand.

"It's not your fault. You couldn't have stopped it. You didn't deserve it." She repeats as she soothes Lizzie. She is reminding both of them.

(oh, it seems I've word-vomited all over my post, oops. I didn't mean for it to be this long, but honestly I've been thinking about this for a while. Hey, are you the anon that asked for the Lizzie angst? Don't worry, I'm working on it lol. Just writing a oneshot about Martyn and Scott first, then I'll do some Lizzie/Joel angst)

[theshiftingwitch]

How to manifest an sp

The fastest and easiest way:

One thing I can tell you about me that I have reserved the right to brag about, is that I've never ever failed at manifesting a specific person.

Even when I didn't know about the law, even when I was still a wide-eyed teenager sauntering through life with bucket loads of anxiety, baseless hope, and religious trauma, I have always manifested every person I've ever wanted. From boyfriends, to friends, to strangers complimenting me on the street randomly for no specific reason whatsoever, when I decided to get a person, I have always succeeded.

It is the easiest thing you will ever do. Now don't give me that look, I can see you already rolling your eyes at your screen saying "I have been trying to manifest my SP for a year and a half and nothing happened, how can you tell me that it's the easiest thing in the world?" Well because I have the experience, the expertise, and the success stories to prove it and I'm going to break it down to you in the simplest of ways, that you're going to manifest your Sp tomorrow morning.

One thing I noticed about everyone trying to manifest a specific person is that most of you (and I want you to take no offense whatsoever to this because we're going to change it immediately) reek of desperation.

You want your SP, and you want them right now, and you will do anything to get them, and you are so desperate that if they were making a reboot for desperate housewives you would get the role effortlessly.

You are a Carrie when you're supposed to be a Samantha. If you haven't seen sex and the city first of all what are you doing? second of all get on it now. But if you have, you will know that Carrie throughout the seasons and the movies was the most desperate bitch anyone has ever seen and all of her relationships ended horrifically including but not limited to being left at the altar by Mr big. Samantha however, was a bad bitch, she knew what she wanted and she got it 100% of the time because she knew she was THAT bitch.

The first thing you need to do is become a Samantha. You need to know your own value, you need to understand that you are the prize, that you should be on the pedestal, that you control this reality and that no man/woman or non-binary person is going to tell you how things are going in your own reality. Stop victimizing yourself, stop waiting on your manifestations, stop waiting for your SP to notice you or text you or acknowledge your existence or leave their 3p behind for you!!! this is your reality and you tell it what the fuck to do.

Your self concept needs to be through the roof, no screw the roof, your self concept needs to be in outer space! you need to think of yourself as God, you need to think of yourself as the only operant power in your reality, you need to think of yourself as if the world will end tomorrow if you decide it would. You need to take care of yourself like the queen (or king, or monarch, we are inclusive here) that you are. Stop overthinking it, stop being desperate, stop waiting for the opportunity for someone else to notice you, notice yourself.

I don't care if your SP is a celebrity. I don't care if you've never met them before in real life, I don't care if you have an enemies to lovers arc that is still developing its enemy portion, I don't care if they think of you as a goblin, as a gremlin walking on two feet, I don't care how they see the world, this is all about you. So you decide who you want to be and carry yourself like that bad bitch.

The second thing you're going to do is decide and fall back. So you decided that your SP is obsessed with you, you decided that your SP is texting you right now as we speak confessing their eternal undying love for you. What are you doing now? Are you holding your phone obsessing over when that text is coming? Are you stalking them on social media to see if they're posting anything or to see if they're online? Are you stalking them to see if there's another girl/boy/person in their life right now? Absolutely the fuck not. You affirmed, you decided, you put things in motion. Now you're going to put your phone down and you're going to screw off to do something else. Go read a book, go watch a TV show, go rearrange your wardrobe and throw away anything you're not wearing anymore, go put on a full face of makeup and take pictures just for the hell of it, go hang out with your friends or bully or younger sibling or go for a walk. Touch grass. Stare at the sun or the moon and acknowledge that you are just as fantastic and magnificent and beautiful and Powerful as that luminary goddess in the sky. The point is, you decided! you put things in motion! there is no reason for you to be checking the 3D every 2 seconds saying "oh where's my manifestation? where is my text? where's my SP?" who the fuck cares? Your SP is currently spiraling, they are losing their goddamn mind trying to come up with the perfect text to send to you that will show just how much they're obsessed with you. They're currently losing whatever brain cells they have left trying to figure out what gift to buy you, what grand gesture they're going to win you over with, what clothes they're going to wear on your date, what restaurant they're going to take you to, what car they need to bring so that would make a good impression, what picture they're going to post on social media so that you would notice them... your sp is currently spiraling, I don't need you to do the same thing! you are in control.

And the last thing you are going to do, is to bask in the feeling of a manifestation well received. You already have your SP, and you already went on the dates, and you already posted the soft launch and the hard lunch and everyone in the world knows that you two are together and everyone is congratulating you in your DMs and everyone is liking your pictures and saying "oh my God couple goals! I wish I had someone who loved me like that! I wish I had someone who showed me off like that! I wish I had someone who bought me flowers and gifts and chocolates like that..." everything is going exactly as you wanted it to and everything is perfect in your life and you are feeling amazing! you are feeling on top of the world, you are feeling like THAT bitch because you are THAT bitch. You are Samantha. Act like it.

Neutralize the energy of desperation and bask in the energy of fulfillment.

Manifesting an SP works based on the principle of thought transmission, which means you need to understand that every thought you have about your SP is going directly into their tiny pea sized brain. (And no, I don't mean every single thought, they can't read your mind. I mean thoughts directed at them with the intention of manifesting them, so don't go and spiral thinking that there are vampires out there reading your mind making fun of you, I am talking about manifesting.) So if you think that your SP is obsessed with you, your SP is going to mirror that because we're all one part of the big brain that is the great consciousness and once you send a direct message it will always be received. So stop losing your mind, stop wondering if it's working because it is working because the law never fails. It's what makes it a law. So rest assured that your thoughts are penetrating their brain through thought transmission and they are thinking exactly what you're thinking.

Give it a try, and let me know how it works for you. I look forward to seeing all of your success stories because I know that this is going to work. You are going to manifest that person.

Happy manifesting ❤️

[tinysheepcrusade]

Only Her

Sevika x Female Reader

Summary: You are the newest addition to the brothel in Zaun. After a few weeks of boring sex work you're the next victim of Silcos right-hand woman, Sevika. Will you make it through the night unphased or fumble under her cold touch?

Content Warning: Smut, Dom Sevika, Teasing, Squirting, Brothel (SexWork), Strap On, Rough Sex, Biting, Almost Hate Sex.

The eye roll you give your manager could kill a grown man. You don't mean to it was just a reflex as she went on and on about a special customer coming tonight.

“Roll those pretty eyes if you want to but they're back from their trip and that's when they storm their way in here riled up.”

“That's great and all Miss Babette but you don't even know who he's going to go for, if he’s a regular shouldn't he have one specific girl he comes for each time? Or is he a girl hopper?” Babette, as gentle as ever, helps you clasp your necklace. You'd only been a brothel worker for two weeks now and you were over the nervous jitters. It was almost the same routine every night with these pathetic men. “It stopped being scary once you realized they only last about two minutes on a good day, and more than half probably don't even know what or where the clit is.” Your tone is bored yet and still Babette is giving you a look you can't place. It's almost worry, you think.

The older woman grabs your chin. “You've already made your first mistake-” she shakes her head. “-this customer isn't a he, they're a she.”

You shrug, still unphased, “Okay so if they pick me-”

“When.” She corrects. ”And when she comes in call me over. Don't do anything to get yourself into trouble with someone like that in the time it takes me to walk over to you.”

“You can't just assume she's going to pick me!” You giggle. Waving over your coworker you ask them about this mystery customer. “Matilda, Miss Babette here has a mystery customer coming in, apparently she's run through each and every girl here. If that's true then just tell me is she bad enough to warrant this speech I'm being given?”

Matilda looks at Babette, her eyes going wide. “Oh…. Sevika's back?” The words make every girl in the dressing room freeze for a split second before they all begin to rush out the door to their sections. All before Babette had even confirmed it.

Your manager nods at the only woman brave enough not to scatter. “I don't even have any advice to give you darling besides good luck.” Matilda gives you a pat on the shoulder. “I would say maybe she won't notice there's a new girl but none of us have escaped at least one night with Sevika.”

“Oh please guys this has gotta be some sort of prank.” You stand up, becoming a bit perturbed by them acting as if this customer was some sort of evil cryptid. “I'm heading to the door to greet, see you later.”

You scamper off in your heels and don't hear the mumble your friend says to the manager. “She's toast.”

~~

The night is painfully slow. You spend most of your time directing the customers to the corresponding room of the woman of their choice. A few attempt to request you but per your managers instructions you have to wait until this Sevika person comes through and picks her poison. It almost makes you mad thinking of the money being passed up, though not having to worry about getting a strangers dick wet was always nice.

You stare at the ledger that's keeping track of customers. You're halfway there to fully zoning out, tempted to request cleaning or working the stripper pole instead of this. The only thing that shocks you out is the door slamming closed. You fly into autopilot, smiling and batting your eyelashes at the woman who just walked in. “Good evening love bug, may I get a name, and then I'll help you find whatever pleasure you are searching for~”

She flashes you a grin. Taking her cigar out and blowing the smoke off to the side. “Names Sevika.

You immediately have to bite back any and all remarks that pop up. Writing her name in the book you do as you were told and call over Babette who rushes over to take the reigns. Their conversation seems to be nothing more than pleasantries so you turn to walk off.

“And where does gorgeous think she's going?”

You almost don't stop at Sevika's words, assuming she was speaking about someone else. If it hadn't been for Babette grabbing your hand you'd have gone off to clean.

“Apologies Sevika, Y/N is still new.”

You raise an eyebrow at your boss in confusion. “I thought you'd want me to go check the vip room to make sure it's stocked before Miss Sevika and her pick entered, that is normally the protocol.”

“That is normally the protocol when you aren't the woman being picked, we already checked the room for you two.”

“With all due respect Babette, Sevika here hasn't requested me and I figured it rude to assume.”

Babette hisses out your name. Her signature sign to subtly tell you that you were on thin ice. You once again must swallow your nature to argue. Bowing in submission you look Sevika in her eyes. “Miss Babette is right I am still new, am I who you'd like tonight?”

Sevika’s eyes flicker between you and your boss. Amusement twinkling bright within them. “Kind of cruel to not warn her even a little about me, Im sure I've got a reputation of some sort.”

Babette closes her eyes and shakes her head “We tried to warn her, she’s just a bit… thick-skulled.”

“I am not thick skulled I simply think I should get to make up my own mind on who you are based on the choices you make and not on some silly rumors or past actions I didn't get to see with my own two eyes.” You're still in bowing position, glare burning holes into the ground. Words flow out your mouth quicker than you could stop them.

“Y/N-” Babette challenges. “Miss Sevika are you sure you want to deal with her tonight?”

Sevika breaks the tension between you and Babette, walking up to you and grabbing your hand. She pulls you not so delicately towards her own body making you almost stumble straight into her chest. She stabilizes you last minute grabbing your chin. “It's sweet you want to give people the benefit of the doubt but I'm exactly the bully they say I am.” Her other hand feels unnaturally cold as she runs it down your back and over your ass, you can't control the full body shiver that comes from you. “Don't worry Babette it seems like you need someone to break her in a little.” Sevika picks you up throwing you over her shoulder like a sack of potatoes. “She's so pretty. I imagine these men probably do whatever she wants them to all the time, I'll show her how to behave.” Sevika shamelessly slaps your ass making you yelp. Making her way up the stairs with you attempting to keep whatever little dignity you had left while being absolutely manhandled.

~~

The sound of Sevika locking the door behind her makes your stomach turn a little. You don't have time to focus on that because next thing you know you're being tossed onto the master bed gracelessly.

You sit up fast, glaring at Sevika. “ I do not need anyone's help and I surely don't need to be broken down, I have every right to defend myself when I'm in the right.”

Sevika just stares at you silently. Her eyes roam all over your body in such a way you feel almost naked yet the anger flooding your veins is overriding any bashfulness you might have had in this moment. “And WHY would you want to have the reputation of being mean to the new girls? I was trying to defend you even before I knew anything about who you were.”

“That's your mistake. I didn't ask for your help.”

“Oh please if you were really so bad as they say you are you'd be banned from stepping foot into this building, which means whatever honorless predator they say you are isn't true.” You make sure to never break eye contact with her. She may be twice your size physically but you weren't about to be made to feel small. “I think your all bark no bite isn't that right Sevika?” You smile up at her, “So what'll it be, how do you want me to fuck you tonight?” You go to reach into the drawer filled with sex toys but freeze when you hear laughter.

Sevika looks thoroughly amused, almost a little crazed as she gets in the bed with you. Without even noticing it, you're backing up. That doesn't last long though because as soon as she notices she grabs your ankle and yanks you back into the perfect position to pin you down. It's only now that she's got you trapped with only one hand holding both wrists that you realized her entire arm is mechanical. You want to spend time observing it but she won't be quiet, won't stop egging you on, your eyes flit back to her face.

“Y/N was it?” She asks. Leaning down to whisper in your ear. “You might wanna stop digging the hole you're in, I've never had a woman speak to me in the way you just did.” She kisses your chin and slowly down your neck. “And here I was thinking I was gonna go easy on you cause you just look so fragile, almost too good to ruin……almost.”

Just the kisses on your neck was a lot to process. You decide to blame it on the fact you were already so worked up. It wasn't normal for any client to actually spend time pampering you. “Sevika I don't need you to do this, there really is no shame in just telling me how you want-ah!”

The lunatic was sucking rough on your neck now. There were sure to be some kind of hickey or bruise left over. “Ya know dollface I'm trying to decide if I should tie you up or just show you how easy it is for me to keep you down with one hand.”

“Kinda hng- kinda cheating if the hand you're using is metal, who wouldn't be able to hold a person down with an arm like that.”

She lets go, only to switch to her real arm holding you down. You curse in your head seeing how even when that metal arm wasn't touching you she still had you completely useless underneath her. Immediately you try to resist yet you are still subdued by one very muscular arm. “What nothing to say to that?”

Rolling your eyes you are growing tired of this quickly. “Wasting time trying to pretend you're a top, Sevi?”

“Says the woman squirming underneath me.”

“You put your teeth on me who wouldn't make a few noises at that!” You spit back.

“Oh Y/N you really gonna make this so much harder than it has to be.” Her other arm comes to the top of your one piece pulling it down to expose your chest.

“I am not being the difficult one, my job is to bring you pleasure and you won't just spit out what you really want, you think I'm going to believe you come here and blow hundreds of dollars just so you can finger me real good then leave?” You scoff, utterly unconvinced. “You’re just like the men who ask me ‘Do you like that?’ as they massage a spot that's thirty damn feet away from my clit.”

Sevika actually snorts at that. “Alright Y/N, yeah you got me, im here to use you. Since you wanna know so bad what gets me off then I'll tell you-” She slides her arm up your skirt and into your panties, slowly sliding two fingers over your cunt and landing only slightly away from the hood of your clit. She leans down and licks the bit of sweat that's materialized on your neck all the way up to your ear. “Nothing turns me on more than breaking down pretty brats like you by putting them through the fucking mattress.”

Her fingers land directly on your sweet spot making you choke. You search her face for signs that she's just trying to pick with you but this is the most sincere she's seemed all night. Pleasure and worry mix in your gut, you try to reverse your hips back not wanting to give into what she's demanding but she doesn't let you run. She tuts at you leaning down to take one nipple in her mouth. It's maddening the way she toys with the jewelry switching back and forth until both of your nips are hard. You’re fighting back panting, deciding to bite your lip and force silence. You can't remember the last client that actually made you feel an inch of pleasure. You were at a loss furrowing your brows together you refused to look at her, opting to pretend you were somewhere else.

“Open your eyes, it's one of your few good traits.”

“Oh screw-” your sassy response is interrupted by the palm of her hand landing a clean slap directly to your cunt. The response you have is out of your control, writhing in pleasure and pain your legs attempt to snap close anything to stop her from doing it again, but then you recognize she doesn't need to do it again she's already got exactly what she wanted from that.

“Look at the mess you've made from barely being played with?” She flashes her palm at you and it's covered in your essence. Slick running down her hand she goes in for a long lick letting a filthy deep groan out. “You taste as good as you look Y/N.” Once she's sure you're watching she closes her eyes and becomes consumed with tasting the fruit of her labor. “I’d let you taste but I don't think you deserve something so sweet with that rotten personality of yours.” Her last suck is exaggerated. Three of her fingers slowly slide out her mouth, saliva trail following them. “Well maybe-” she slowly brings her fingers to your mouth and desperately you surge forward to try and get a taste of her but as soon as you do you’re met with her taking your thigh and hitching it up on her hip as the three fingers push into your pussy and begin vibrating.

When you wail and arch up into her she hums in approval. “Oh yeah, there we go.” Sevika’s fingers are so long, she's hitting a place in you that you aren't accustomed to. You wanna fight it, fight her, but all you can do is wrap your fingers into the bedsheets and fuck up against her. “Enjoying my fingers I see, what'll you do if I really fuck you.”

“S-shut up!” The command comes out as a squeal. “Vibrating metal fingers what kind of…” your brain starts to blank. You shake your head back in forth trying to remember the words. “What kind of sadistic pervert do you have to be to even think of this.”

A sensation you've never felt before washes over you, immediately you try to close your legs and continue complaining. “Sevika be serious for a moment I feel off, let me go I need a moment.”

The woman's eyes show her confusion and then light up. “Oh my God you've gotta be joking, a sex worker who's never-” she trails off. You can see the gears turning in her head. “You aren't going anywhere, I have something to show you, something to prove.” She growls into your ear.

All you can do is take it. No amount of fighting it eased the intensity or frees you from her claws.

Sevika hums, ignoring you for a while in favor of working you up. She's staring into your soul enjoying every second of the active meltdown she was sending you into. “Are you getting it now? Your coworkers were right about me, you just accidentally admitted you were wrong.”

Only every other word is processed through your brain. Hips jerking up into her hand. The tightening in your stomach is undeniable. It’s been so long since you've cared to cum at all. Sex being your job had made it so much less interesting until this very moment when Sevika was dragging an orgasm out of you one way or another.

“I'm-pl-no I'm not gonna-” you swallow down the urge to beg. “Shit oh!” You arch so high it's almost painful. An incoherent squeal leaves your lips while she works you down from your high. Your eyes are once again squeezed shut and you don't open them again until you hear her meddling around in the drawer. You see her fixing a harness around her and immediately go into negotiation mode.

“Sevika, hunny, I don't think I can handle anymore that was intense and….” You're struggling to come up with the words to deter her. From just the glance she throws your way, you both know you can absolutely handle more physically but the embarrassment of being the only one fully naked, soaking wet, and near tears at the pleasure after all the mouthing off you did earlier, now that might kill you.

The smile she flashes at you says it all but still, she rubs it in “What's wrong baby? You look so good like this all messy underneath me. I'm all bark no bite right? so what's got you acting like my touch might burn you?”

“I am not!” You cry out. Your will to fight is being broken down little by little. “Who wouldn't cum after what you've done to me! It's only natural-”

She sticks her fingers in your mouth and without even thinking you start cleaning them off. Sucking them the way you know people like, normally it's you making people melt beneath you but you've finally met your match. “You're right about one single thing, for a slut like you this is natural~”

Sevika reaches into the bag she brought and the dildo attachment she pulls out makes your eyes widen. You try to pull back, to protest the size, to wiggle away but she's already accounted for all those reactions. She grabs your ankles pushing them near your head, not used to this position you groan at the feeling.

“Aw Y/N did just the stretch of your legs feel good right there? Your gonna love what I've got in store for you.”

“No, no, there's no way that's going to fit inside me, find someone else to torture with ah~” Your body betrays you, bucking up against the toy when she rubs it through your cunt to gather the wetness. Pure panic hits you and the next words tumble out so fast you can't stop it. “Sevika-” you try giving her puppy dog eyes. “Sevika I apologize.”

“HA!” the sound she lets out is so demeaning. “I think this is about something completely different than what you are crying about, maybe if you spit it out I'll go easy on you, hmm?”

Shit. You know she's beginning to read you like a book and yet you still try to talk your way out of this. “No I'm just intimidated by the size that's all I don't-”

Her other hand wraps itself around your throat, cutting off your lie. “A little bit ago you started whining and begged so pathetically for your freedom, you looked so so panicked, has no one ever made you squirt before? Better yet has anyone ever touched your g-spot before me because all I did was graze it and you fell apart at the seams.”

Fuck.

“Sevika I think-”

“No, you don't.” She smiles in response to the wicked glare you shoot her way.

“I THINK- you could find a woman who will do this for you for free, you are burning money for no reason.”

“Aw concerned for my well-being?”

You truthfully couldn't care less why she's doing what she's doing right now. She's paying to wreck you and all you can really do to keep a little composure is bicker with her. “I'm concerned about your brain it must be fried! You think I've gotten this far in life and never squirted?! I simply don't enjoy it…”

The look Sevika gives you lets you know that she knows you are full of shit. Though this time she doesn't roll her eyes, she starts rubbing little circles on your thighs soothing the small ache trying to take hold. “Ohhhh~” Her hands leave your neck and thigh, helping you sit up. For two seconds you think you've won and successfully baited her into not destroying you with her dick.

Until she picks you up and pins you against the door.

Her hands lift you up by your ass meaning your feet aren't on the ground anymore. The wind is almost knocked out of you and she smirks watching your naked breast heave, trying to get air back.

“Damnit Sevika!” It comes out strangled and strained. “I just said-”

“Oh, I heard you angel…I'm gonna abide by your wishes don't worry.” Her hands keep you spread out. Using the cum already coating your pussy, she makes sure her dildo is well lubricated. Truthfully you didn't even know being this wet was something you were capable of but you’d be damned if you addmited that to her. “Loud and clear” Sevika slowly inches into you choosing to watch your face contort as she maliciously complies with your story. Only the tip is in when she pulls back out slowly. Her hips are barely moving and you slowly deduce what this is.

“I wonder what I did to make God send me such a malicious woman to my bed, ah-fuck!-”

She only gives you one satisfying thrust to shut you up, then she's back to being a bully.

You look up at her through your eyelashes. She's clearly gonna keep you here, keep gently pushing your buttons until you malfunction. You fear with how lightly she's rubbing your clit she's willing to spend all night here in bed until you squeal. Until you beg for her to properly breed you.

The eye roll you give your manager could kill a grown man. You don't mean to it was just a reflex as she went on and on about a special customer coming tonight.

“Roll those pretty eyes if you want to but they're back from their trip and that's when they storm their way in here riled up.”

“That's great and all Miss Babette but you don't even know who he's going to go for, if he’s a regular shouldn't he have one specific girl he comes for each time? Or is he a girl hopper?” Babette, as gentle as ever, helps you clasp your necklace. You'd only been a brothel worker for two weeks now and you were over the nervous jitters. It was almost the same routine every night with these pathetic men. “It stopped being scary once you realized they only last about two minutes on a good day, and more than half probably don't even know what or where the clit is.” Your tone is bored yet and still Babette is giving you a look you can't place. It's almost worry, you think.

The older woman grabs your chin. “You've already made your first mistake-” she shakes her head. “-this customer isn't a he, they're a she.”

You shrug, still unphased, “Okay so if they pick me-”

“When.” She corrects. ”And when she comes in call me over. Don't do anything to get yourself into trouble with someone like that in the time it takes me to walk over to you.”

“You can't just assume she's going to pick me!” You giggle. Waving over your coworker you ask them about this mystery customer. “Matilda, Miss Babette here has a mystery customer coming in, apparently she's run through each and every girl here. If that's true then just tell me is she bad enough to warrant this speech I'm being given?”

Matilda looks at Babette, her eyes going wide. “Oh…. Sevika's back?” The words make every girl in the dressing room freeze for a split second before they all begin to rush out the door to their sections. All before Babette had even confirmed it.

Your manager nods at the only woman brave enough not to scatter. “I don't even have any advice to give you darling besides good luck.” Matilda gives you a pat on the shoulder. “I would say maybe she won't notice there's a new girl but none of us have escaped at least one night with Sevika.”

“Oh please guys this has gotta be some sort of prank.” You stand up, becoming a bit perturbed by them acting as if this customer was some sort of evil cryptid. “I'm heading to the door to greet, see you later.”

You scamper off in your heels and don't hear the mumble your friend says to the manager. “She's toast.”

~~

The night is painfully slow. You spend most of your time directing the customers to the corresponding room of the woman of their choice. A few attempt to request you but per your managers instructions you have to wait until this Sevika person comes through and picks her poison. It almost makes you mad thinking of the money being passed up, though not having to worry about getting a strangers dick wet was always nice.

You stare at the ledger that's keeping track of customers. You're halfway there to fully zoning out, tempted to request cleaning or working the stripper pole instead of this. The only thing that shocks you out is the door slamming closed. You fly into autopilot, smiling and batting your eyelashes at the woman who just walked in. “Good evening love bug, may I get a name, and then I'll help you find whatever pleasure you are searching for~”

She flashes you a grin. Taking her cigar out and blowing the smoke off to the side. “Names Sevika.

You immediately have to bite back any and all remarks that pop up. Writing her name in the book you do as you were told and call over Babette who rushes over to take the reigns. Their conversation seems to be nothing more than pleasantries so you turn to walk off.

“And where does gorgeous think she's going?”

You almost don't stop at Sevika's words, assuming she was speaking about someone else. If it hadn't been for Babette grabbing your hand you'd have gone off to clean.

“Apologies Sevika, Y/N is still new.”

You raise an eyebrow at your boss in confusion. “I thought you'd want me to go check the vip room to make sure it's stocked before Miss Sevika and her pick entered, that is normally the protocol.”

“That is normally the protocol when you aren't the woman being picked, we already checked the room for you two.”

“With all due respect Babette, Sevika here hasn't requested me and I figured it rude to assume.”

Babette hisses out your name. Her signature sign to subtly tell you that you were on thin ice. You once again must swallow your nature to argue. Bowing in submission you look Sevika in her eyes. “Miss Babette is right I am still new, am I who you'd like tonight?”

Sevika’s eyes flicker between you and your boss. Amusement twinkling bright within them. “Kind of cruel to not warn her even a little about me, Im sure I've got a reputation of some sort.”

Babette closes her eyes and shakes her head “We tried to warn her, she’s just a bit… thick-skulled.”

“I am not thick skulled I simply think I should get to make up my own mind on who you are based on the choices you make and not on some silly rumors or past actions I didn't get to see with my own two eyes.” You're still in bowing position, glare burning holes into the ground. Words flow out your mouth quicker than you could stop them.

“Y/N-” Babette challenges. “Miss Sevika are you sure you want to deal with her tonight?”

Sevika breaks the tension between you and Babette, walking up to you and grabbing your hand. She pulls you not so delicately towards her own body making you almost stumble straight into her chest. She stabilizes you last minute grabbing your chin. “It's sweet you want to give people the benefit of the doubt but I'm exactly the bully they say I am.” Her other hand feels unnaturally cold as she runs it down your back and over your ass, you can't control the full body shiver that comes from you. “Don't worry Babette it seems like you need someone to break her in a little.” Sevika picks you up throwing you over her shoulder like a sack of potatoes. “She's so pretty. I imagine these men probably do whatever she wants them to all the time, I'll show her how to behave.” Sevika shamelessly slaps your ass making you yelp. Making her way up the stairs with you attempting to keep whatever little dignity you had left while being absolutely manhandled.

~~

The sound of Sevika locking the door behind her makes your stomach turn a little. You don't have time to focus on that because next thing you know you're being tossed onto the master bed gracelessly.

You sit up fast, glaring at Sevika. “ I do not need anyone's help and I surely don't need to be broken down, I have every right to defend myself when I'm in the right.”

Sevika just stares at you silently. Her eyes roam all over your body in such a way you feel almost naked yet the anger flooding your veins is overriding any bashfulness you might have had in this moment. “And WHY would you want to have the reputation of being mean to the new girls? I was trying to defend you even before I knew anything about who you were.”

“That's your mistake. I didn't ask for your help.”

“Oh please if you were really so bad as they say you are you'd be banned from stepping foot into this building, which means whatever honorless predator they say you are isn't true.” You make sure to never break eye contact with her. She may be twice your size physically but you weren't about to be made to feel small. “I think your all bark no bite isn't that right Sevika?” You smile up at her, “So what'll it be, how do you want me to fuck you tonight?” You go to reach into the drawer filled with sex toys but freeze when you hear laughter.

Sevika looks thoroughly amused, almost a little crazed as she gets in the bed with you. Without even noticing it, you're backing up. That doesn't last long though because as soon as she notices she grabs your ankle and yanks you back into the perfect position to pin you down. It's only now that she's got you trapped with only one hand holding both wrists that you realized her entire arm is mechanical. You want to spend time observing it but she won't be quiet, won't stop egging you on, your eyes flit back to her face.

“Y/N was it?” She asks. Leaning down to whisper in your ear. “You might wanna stop digging the hole you're in, I've never had a woman speak to me in the way you just did.” She kisses your chin and slowly down your neck. “And here I was thinking I was gonna go easy on you cause you just look so fragile, almost too good to ruin……almost.”

Just the kisses on your neck was a lot to process. You decide to blame it on the fact you were already so worked up. It wasn't normal for any client to actually spend time pampering you. “Sevika I don't need you to do this, there really is no shame in just telling me how you want-ah!”

The lunatic was sucking rough on your neck now. There were sure to be some kind of hickey or bruise left over. “Ya know dollface I'm trying to decide if I should tie you up or just show you how easy it is for me to keep you down with one hand.”

“Kinda hng- kinda cheating if the hand you're using is metal, who wouldn't be able to hold a person down with an arm like that.”

She lets go, only to switch to her real arm holding you down. You curse in your head seeing how even when that metal arm wasn't touching you she still had you completely useless underneath her. Immediately you try to resist yet you are still subdued by one very muscular arm. “What nothing to say to that?”

Rolling your eyes you are growing tired of this quickly. “Wasting time trying to pretend you're a top, Sevi?”

“Says the woman squirming underneath me.”

“You put your teeth on me who wouldn't make a few noises at that!” You spit back.

“Oh Y/N you really gonna make this so much harder than it has to be.” Her other arm comes to the top of your one piece pulling it down to expose your chest.

“I am not being the difficult one, my job is to bring you pleasure and you won't just spit out what you really want, you think I'm going to believe you come here and blow hundreds of dollars just so you can finger me real good then leave?” You scoff, utterly unconvinced. “You’re just like the men who ask me ‘Do you like that?’ as they massage a spot that's thirty damn feet away from my clit.”

Sevika actually snorts at that. “Alright Y/N, yeah you got me, im here to use you. Since you wanna know so bad what gets me off then I'll tell you-” She slides her arm up your skirt and into your panties, slowly sliding two fingers over your cunt and landing only slightly away from the hood of your clit. She leans down and licks the bit of sweat that's materialized on your neck all the way up to your ear. “Nothing turns me on more than breaking down pretty brats like you by putting them through the fucking mattress.”

Her fingers land directly on your sweet spot making you choke. You search her face for signs that she's just trying to pick with you but this is the most sincere she's seemed all night. Pleasure and worry mix in your gut, you try to reverse your hips back not wanting to give into what she's demanding but she doesn't let you run. She tuts at you leaning down to take one nipple in her mouth. It's maddening the way she toys with the jewelry switching back and forth until both of your nips are hard. You’re fighting back panting, deciding to bite your lip and force silence. You can't remember the last client that actually made you feel an inch of pleasure. You were at a loss furrowing your brows together you refused to look at her, opting to pretend you were somewhere else.

“Open your eyes, it's one of your few good traits.”

“Oh screw-” your sassy response is interrupted by the palm of her hand landing a clean slap directly to your cunt. The response you have is out of your control, writhing in pleasure and pain your legs attempt to snap close anything to stop her from doing it again, but then you recognize she doesn't need to do it again she's already got exactly what she wanted from that.

“Look at the mess you've made from barely being played with?” She flashes her palm at you and it's covered in your essence. Slick running down her hand she goes in for a long lick letting a filthy deep groan out. “You taste as good as you look Y/N.” Once she's sure you're watching she closes her eyes and becomes consumed with tasting the fruit of her labor. “I’d let you taste but I don't think you deserve something so sweet with that rotten personality of yours.” Her last suck is exaggerated. Three of her fingers slowly slide out her mouth, saliva trail following them. “Well maybe-” she slowly brings her fingers to your mouth and desperately you surge forward to try and get a taste of her but as soon as you do you’re met with her taking your thigh and hitching it up on her hip as the three fingers push into your pussy and begin vibrating.

When you wail and arch up into her she hums in approval. “Oh yeah, there we go.” Sevika’s fingers are so long, she's hitting a place in you that you aren't accustomed to. You wanna fight it, fight her, but all you can do is wrap your fingers into the bedsheets and fuck up against her. “Enjoying my fingers I see, what'll you do if I really fuck you.”

“S-shut up!” The command comes out as a squeal. “Vibrating metal fingers what kind of…” your brain starts to blank. You shake your head back in forth trying to remember the words. “What kind of sadistic pervert do you have to be to even think of this.”

A sensation you've never felt before washes over you, immediately you try to close your legs and continue complaining. “Sevika be serious for a moment I feel off, let me go I need a moment.”

The woman's eyes show her confusion and then light up. “Oh my God you've gotta be joking, a sex worker who's never-” she trails off. You can see the gears turning in her head. “You aren't going anywhere, I have something to show you, something to prove.” She growls into your ear.

All you can do is take it. No amount of fighting it eased the intensity or frees you from her claws.

Sevika hums, ignoring you for a while in favor of working you up. She's staring into your soul enjoying every second of the active meltdown she was sending you into. “Are you getting it now? Your coworkers were right about me, you just accidentally admitted you were wrong.”

Only every other word is processed through your brain. Hips jerking up into her hand. The tightening in your stomach is undeniable. It’s been so long since you've cared to cum at all. Sex being your job had made it so much less interesting until this very moment when Sevika was dragging an orgasm out of you one way or another.

“I'm-pl-no I'm not gonna-” you swallow down the urge to beg. “Shit oh!” You arch so high it's almost painful. An incoherent squeal leaves your lips while she works you down from your high. Your eyes are once again squeezed shut and you don't open them again until you hear her meddling around in the drawer. You see her fixing a harness around her and immediately go into negotiation mode.

“Sevika, hunny, I don't think I can handle anymore that was intense and….” You're struggling to come up with the words to deter her. From just the glance she throws your way, you both know you can absolutely handle more physically but the embarrassment of being the only one fully naked, soaking wet, and near tears at the pleasure after all the mouthing off you did earlier, now that might kill you.

The smile she flashes at you says it all but still, she rubs it in “What's wrong baby? You look so good like this all messy underneath me. I'm all bark no bite right? so what's got you acting like my touch might burn you?”

“I am not!” You cry out. Your will to fight is being broken down little by little. “Who wouldn't cum after what you've done to me! It's only natural-”

She sticks her fingers in your mouth and without even thinking you start cleaning them off. Sucking them the way you know people like, normally it's you making people melt beneath you but you've finally met your match. “You're right about one single thing, for a slut like you this is natural~”

Sevika reaches into the bag she brought and the dildo attachment she pulls out makes your eyes widen. You try to pull back, to protest the size, to wiggle away but she's already accounted for all those reactions. She grabs your ankles pushing them near your head, not used to this position you groan at the feeling.

“Aw Y/N did just the stretch of your legs feel good right there? Your gonna love what I've got in store for you.”

“No, no, there's no way that's going to fit inside me, find someone else to torture with ah~” Your body betrays you, bucking up against the toy when she rubs it through your cunt to gather the wetness. Pure panic hits you and the next words tumble out so fast you can't stop it. “Sevika-” you try giving her puppy dog eyes. “Sevika I apologize.”

“HA!” the sound she lets out is so demeaning. “I think this is about something completely different than what you are crying about, maybe if you spit it out I'll go easy on you, hmm?”

Shit. You know she's beginning to read you like a book and yet you still try to talk your way out of this. “No I'm just intimidated by the size that's all I don't-”

Her other hand wraps itself around your throat, cutting off your lie. “A little bit ago you started whining and begged so pathetically for your freedom, you looked so so panicked, has no one ever made you squirt before? Better yet has anyone ever touched your g-spot before me because all I did was graze it and you fell apart at the seams.”

Fuck.

“Sevika I think-”

“No, you don't.” She smiles in response to the wicked glare you shoot her way.

“I THINK- you could find a woman who will do this for you for free, you are burning money for no reason.”

“Aw concerned for my well-being?”

You truthfully couldn't care less why she's doing what she's doing right now. She's paying to wreck you and all you can really do to keep a little composure is bicker with her. “I'm concerned about your brain it must be fried! You think I've gotten this far in life and never squirted?! I simply don't enjoy it…”

The look Sevika gives you lets you know that she knows you are full of shit. Though this time she doesn't roll her eyes, she starts rubbing little circles on your thighs soothing the small ache trying to take hold. “Ohhhh~” Her hands leave your neck and thigh, helping you sit up. For two seconds you think you've won and successfully baited her into not destroying you with her dick.

Until she picks you up and pins you against the door.

Her hands lift you up by your ass meaning your feet aren't on the ground anymore. The wind is almost knocked out of you and she smirks watching your naked breast heave, trying to get air back.

“Damnit Sevika!” It comes out strangled and strained. “I just said-”

“Oh, I heard you angel…I'm gonna abide by your wishes don't worry.” Her hands keep you spread out. Using the cum already coating your pussy, she makes sure her dildo is well lubricated. Truthfully you didn't even know being this wet was something you were capable of but you’d be damned if you addmited that to her. “Loud and clear” Sevika slowly inches into you choosing to watch your face contort as she maliciously complies with your story. Only the tip is in when she pulls back out slowly. Her hips are barely moving and you slowly deduce what this is.

“I wonder what I did to make God send me such a malicious woman to my bed, ah-fuck!-”

She only gives you one satisfying thrust to shut you up, then she's back to being a bully.

You look up at her through your eyelashes. She's clearly gonna keep you here, keep gently pushing your buttons until you malfunction. You fear with how lightly she's rubbing your clit she's willing to spend all night here in bed until you squeal. Until you beg for her to properly breed you.

After only a few minutes you can't take it anymore. You push your hips up, forcing the toy almost halfway inside you. Even that feels more rewarding than whatever crumbs she was giving you. It's short lived of course as she pulls out.

“Now Y/N what was that?” Quirking an eyebrow she's clearly holding back a smile. “You just bitched about not wanting me to touch your g spot or make you squirt, So stop moving and behave. Let me use you like a pocket pussy.”

Fuck Sevika. No matter what you did she was always quick to one-up you. You’re ready to crash out on this woman but a solution comes to mind. “Well you are right I don't like it but I don't want you to take all night to bust so I'll take it quietly if I must.” Crossing your arms you toot your nose up, she may fuck the pride and respect out your body but she could never take your spite.

“Aw” Sevika coos. “For me? You shouldn't have-” She fixes your position then thrusts till her hips connect with yours. She pulls out a few more times then slams back in every time. “You really shouldn't have.”

The woman sets a fast, hard pace. That wretched toy is so big you can not only feel the tip hit your stomach but see the bulge. Your hand goes down to push at Sevika's hips but because of the difference in your two strengths, she pays it no mind. Once again she's beating up your pussy and your left slackjawed and crying. Her dick thrust into the deepest most sensitive part of you over and over. There's nothing you can do now, you know you'll be clowned tomorrow for the way your wailing right now but it can't be helped. The cheap walls rattled with every push of her hips. No matter how much you tried to deny her your body is always honest. Say you don't like it but your pretty pussy is clenching so sweetly around the toy.

Around her.

“Oh Y/N the way your tits bounce is worth every penny I spent tonight. Sevika decides to look down to where you’re joined. Biting her lip she slows down to grind into your cunt staring shamelessly at your body. “Almost forgot about her~” Mechanical fingers come to caress your clit. Almost immediately that feeling takes hold in your tummy again and it's mind-numbingly intense. Your pitiful writhing is enough of a sign to know that you're racing toward your edge. Her real arm on your behind is single-handly keeping you up, she squeezes your ass hard before taunting. “Nothing else to say Y/N?”

All you know is pleasure right now. All you know is Sevika. You would be so disappointed in yourself later for melting like an ice cream cone in the summer heat in front of a woman like her but right now you were being reduced to a whiney bottom who wanted special treatment.

“Vika….please kiss me?”

Sevika froze for just a moment, confused by the sudden intimacy between you two. Normally she would shoot you down but God were you so damn gorgeous, your hair was a mess, lips swollen, makeup smudged, and still you were the best looking woman she's ever seen. She decides to indulge you and honestly herself too. Something switches in her brain when your kiss taste like cherry lipgloss Sevika sucks on your tongue not letting you retreat until she's had her fill. “Better Y/N?”

“So much better! So good! Gonna…I'm gonna make a mess if you don't stop Vika.” It's inevitable now. You were already leaking onto the damn floor, “Vika permission to cum? I want you to unh- want you to tell me I can mmm wanna be your good girl!”

Sevika considers being cruel, especially since you were being a brat the entire night and now that she had you about to blow you wanna act right but your angelic voice and tiny tears accumulating in the corner of your eyes were enough to stop her. “You don't deserve it but I'm so gracious that I'll give it to ya~”

That's all it takes, thank you is all you can get out before it turns to mindless moaning. Your hips jerk uncontrollably as you splash Sevika's pants, shirt, and even her face. Your hands are tangled in her hair and the tension makes Sevika groan. She wastes no time wiping the cum into her mouth and letting out a noise fit for the filthiest of porns. The mess you are making is all she could ask for and more. A model material girl all messed up like this because of her? Life couldn't be any sweeter. The cherry on top was how defiant you started out as only to crumple like a wet napkin.

Sevika surprisingly carried your princess style back to the bed, finding a dry area to lay you down. “Listen I'm not much for aftercare…” she trails off awkwardly.

Exhausted, you giggle. “That's okay Sevika you can go, I'm a big girl and I imagine there's other customers I have to deal with.”

Sevika returns to her grumpy face. “Can you even walk right now?” Annoyance clear in her voice. “Stop acting tough.” She shakes her head gray eyes rolling for the millionth time that night. “You seem damn near delirious”

You waved her off, pushing up on your elbows to look at her. “Well your times about up so you have to leave regardless, I'll just take a female client first until I regain my strength. “Would you like me to see you to the front door Sevika?”

For a reason she can't place you were pissing her off. “If you get up I'll make you regret it.” She pokes a finger at your chest. “I'll be back and you better be in the exact same spot Y/N.” With that, she nearly rushes out of the room. About 15 minutes later she's back and silently gets into bed with you.

“Sevika you gotta go and I gotta get back to work! Lets-”

She pulls you by the waist against her chest. “No.”

You are so tired but resist dozing off until she speaks up. “The room and you are mine till the morning sun comes up. Now go to sleep I can tell you need it badly.”

There's no energy left to actually tease her and it's nothing but a fleeting thought. You fall asleep peacefully for the first time in weeks.

[cars2-renaissance]

Oh shit you guys I woke up this morning with another headcanon. Ughhhhhhhh this one really fucked me up. I’m gonna post it under a cut cause theres discussion about death and su*cidal ideation and it’s just super depressing. So please don’t read if you’re not in a good headspace.

I think this is the worst one yet. It's just pain.

So I always noticed that Finn is really quiet in Big Ben when they're tied up. Mater is talking back to the lemons and engaging with them but Finn is COMPLETELY silent.

Now maybe it's cause he's an experienced agent and knows not to open his big mouth. But when has Finn ever not been on the spot with these jokers? Why is he so quiet and resigned here?

He's resigned! He doesn't even try to escape. He's glad that Mater makes it out (maybe??) but after that, he's just like oh well guess I'll die?

Finn is incredibly crafty with cheating death. I mean just look at the oil rig scene. Even after the extreme shock of seeing Leland dead, he's still able to make split second decisions to save himself and make it out. And that was when it was just his life on the line! He doesn't even seem to care about Holley's life at all in this scene! And this is the same car who seemed genuinely gutted by seeing the wgp racers getting their engines blown in the second race, these random strangers he doesn't know. You can't tell me he doesn't care about others!

So what the FUCK did they do to him to break him that much??

Well. They had him prisoner and while they kept Mater gassed the whole time in between races, we don't know what happened to Finn or Holley. We don't know that they were unconscious the entire time. But we do know certain among the lemons are complete sadists. I've wondered for a while if they filmed what they did to Leland. Zündapp wasn't there for it and he seemed to take personal satisfaction in the aftermath. It's completely plausible that Grem recorded the whole thing even to just show the professor later.

But you know who they would take particular delight in showing a snuff tape of Leland Turbo to?

Finn.

And that would be enough to keep him quiet in Big Ben, to want nothing more than to die there, crushed to death just like Leland, because he deserved it after not getting there in time to save him. He wanted to die there so bad that even Holley's life didn't matter. And when he did get out of that situation (thanks to Holley), the only thing on his mind was going after Zündapp.

They just found out there is an actual bomb attached to Mater and he's heading for a highly populated civilian area IN LONDON FOR CRYING OUT LOUD; this is likely Finn's home town. You'd think he'd stop at nothing to go take care of that situation and not leave it to the total newbie.

But no. He is out for BLOOD against Zündapp. Holley can save London—who CARES about London or any of these cars he's gotten close to over the past two weeks—Zündapp is on the loose and Finn is not going to let that slide. He puts himself in deaths door yet again to catch this motherfucker. He barely flinches while getting heavy artillery shot at him. And his grand solution at the end is to blow them all the fuck up.

The size of that explosion SHOULD have killed them all. Finn was more than willing to kill himself if it meant Zündapp died with him, plus Tony Trihull who at this point he probably knows is the location of Leland's death. They can all just get blown to hell.

But he and Zündapp survive somehow—I don't think the same can be said for Trihull—and we see them later, finally pulling up to the races. We also see that Zündapp is completely tangled in Finn's grapple lines in ways that could only be possible if he was flipped around multiple times in all directions. Finn got him to the bomb site but not before beating the ever loving shit out of him. He is FURIOUS and doesn't bat an eye when Holley tases a car in full custody. Because it's Zündapp, and Finn only just stopped short of killing him.

Finn is a hot mess throughout the movie. He takes unbelievable risks and pulls ridiculous stunts. BUT he always has it pretty under control and above all, he shows genuine care for those around him. But there is a definite shift in his values and goals after Big Ben. There's a real possibility that it's because he had to watch Leland die in that window of time.

I hate this headcanon so much but I had to write it out this morning

This was all just off the top of my head a few minutes after waking up, haunted by this headcanon, so I’ll go back and rewatch the scene to see if anything sticks out to me. I’ve combed over the opening of the movie so many times to analyse it but I want to go over the Big Ben scene again to comb over it too cause it’s got a lot packed into it.

But yeah. Happy Valentine’s Day y’all!

[dark-lord-of-awesomeness]

Jurassic Park made me love Emma-May even more somehow! She deserved to feed at least couple of enemies to her creations! Also I love how she both felt guilty because her family also got hurt, but still 😔 dinos 😔

So young! Haven't gotten to eat even a single enemy!

Also in my heart, the flashlight loving velo accidentally ran by a growth-changing crystal and survived. People think it's a very odd lizard with battery acid addiction. Stranger things happened! Mostly because I want Dipper to stumble upon it someday and get a pocket-sized dinosaur of my dreams. And a few bitten fingers, but one has to make sacrifices (for pets and science!) If Mabel can have a big pig, why can't he have a tiny velociraptor?

Why did it live that long? Flashlight battery acid gives you magic ✨

Stan would not be amused, but Emma-May would be dangerously delighted.

That's excellent! I understand why she wasn't in the show, because the story is about the mystery twins and not the older generation, but it still leaves a hole. We don't know anything about her! Woman deserved to feed her at least a few of her enemies to dinos. Yes it was sad and people died, but none of them were on her list! What a waste!

An amazing idea. Truly, who knows how many of those dinos found alternative ways out of the mines before they sealed it.

Emma-May would weep tears of joy to know it escaped, then the episode would revolve around making sure she didn't regrow it and send it after her enemies. Stan would hate it forever and be trying to make it run away. He will never like the tiny menace.

[hopeswriting]

#khr #he was doomed then he doomed himself augh augh #honestly i see ppl criticising tyl tsuna for this bc of all the sneaking and everything but rly how far against the wall did he have to #be pushed to do this #to destroy the rings to doom himself present and past to being tied to vongola so tightly to do it not only to himself #but all the others too #like does tsuna our tsuna ever look at them or look in the mirror and wonder if in 10 years hell have that mindset #does he ever think and realize he understands and how much does it terrify him #will i turn into him am i him already #all that and hes still in middle school #existential crisis rescheduled sorry we have a math test this week and were behind bc our teacher was a fraud #but thats also a story for another day we have waterboarding 101 with reborn this weekend

via @slonechnik

oh yes this, absolutely. this is absolutely NOT a critic of tyl tsuna, i'm always gonna be a tyl tsuna protector and defender. i love that his hands were forced to make such fucked up choices, and then he chose himself to deal with their consequences. <3 like he didn't know he'd be the one who'd resent him the most for it. <3 and all along he did it for them as an act of kindness and love and hope and faith against hopeless odds. <3

more seriously tho haha. i agree that tyl tsuna bringing their present selves to the future was obviously the last thing he wanted to do. he quite literally tried everything else before that, including destroying the rings like you said, to hopefully stop the oncoming war before it got any worse. and i said above present tsuna is the one who resents him the most for that, but if not him, then it's tyl tsuna himself for sure. he eventually gave in to make that choice because it was the only one left to make, but without doubt he made it with a heavy heart and a heavy conscience.

i also LOVE the idea of tyl tsuna being tsuna's line drawn in the sand. if you get what i mean?? like, throughout the entire arc tsuna's all "how could he do this??". he so obviously sees tyl tsuna as stranger to him, he can't understand or relate to him at all, but tyl tsuna is still himself. was once the same boy he is now too. so who's to say he won't grow up to become like him too?

#will i turn into him am i him already < and then he's talking about HIMSELF!!!!!!!! i don't think you can just say that btw, but thank you for saying it so i can now lose my mind over it

[ID copied from alt text: A gifset about Sawada Tsunayoshi, from the anime Katekyo Hitman Reborn. A picture of a quote precedes and follows each gif.

Gif 1: Tsuna lies inside the coffin of his Ten Years Later self, pushing the lid open to the side. The quote framing the gif says, "Brief pause.", first in white against a black background, and then in black, bolded text against a white background.

Gif 2: Tsuna is on his knees, facing us, his head off frame. Underneath him, the Vongola's emblem shines brightly. The quote framing the gif says, "I'm walking backward", first in white against a black background, and then in black, bolded text against a white background.

Gif 3: Tsuna and Vongola Primo face each other, both in Hyper Dying Will mode. They hold one hand in front of them, the back of their X-Gloves and I-Gloves respectively, facing each other. The Vongola's emblem shines brightly in between their hands. The quote framing the gif says, "into my own myth.", first in white against a black background, and then in black, bolded text against a white background.

Gif 4: Tsuna and the rest of the guardians run on the crosswalk, their backs to us, while the girls, Bianchi, Fuuta and Giannini are across the crosswalk, running too to meet them halfway. The quote framing the gif says, "I was trying to walk out.", first in white against a black background, and then in black, bolded text against a white background. /End ID]

— H of H Playbook by Anne Carson. (Insp.)

future arc, get behind me. they just don't get you like i do 😌

[secondbeatsongs]

going through some old logs, and I need you to understand just how truly unhinged early 2010s RP omegle was.

genuinely you could stay on there for hours with just one person, hashing out complex traumatic backstories, drawn-out love confessions, detailed action scenes...collaboratively describing graphic violence, past abuse, comfort, hurt/comfort, hurt/no comfort, any number of sex acts...and then one of you would be like, "oh haha it's 2AM! I have to sleep :(" and the other person would say, "omg saaaame. :( gnight!!!" and then you'd exit the chat and never speak to each other again, and this was. fine.

you could just spend an entire evening shoving your wretched, bleeding soul into a chat log with someone you'd never meet or learn the name of, achieve some form of emotional catharsis, and then go about your day or night like this was an average way to spend your time.

I'm really normal about this, actually

[strange-anni]

This is the source El finds in the void and it's twofold. It's the father. In this case it's Neil but he's just a stand-in for Lonnie.

The other source is the Steel Works warehouse BRIMBORN but that's not how it is presented to us throughout season 3.

It reads more like BRIMBORN as a shadow covers up the B pretty consistently, making us unable to read it

Warning for discussions of CSA under the cut

We also get the full address of the steelworks warehouse and it's

Brimborn Steelworks 6522 Cherry Oak Drive

This is how where the MF possessed Billy. Cherry Oak Drive

Lonnie also means oak tree

Max also tells us Billys full address

Billy Hargrove 4819 Cherry Lane

Billy lives on Cherry Lane but he lost himself and got possessed by the father at Cherry Oak Drive. A lane to drive on...

Source

Billy was a Cherry Lane at first until he got corrupted in the Cheery Oak Drive

Billy is short for William and a stand-in for Will

We also learn more about cherries and their availability

Hopper says there is no cherry in the 7-Eleven. Apparently they had only strawberry

That's not entirely true tough as we see with Alexei here. In fact it seems like they have only cherry and cola. But Hopper still drove there even though it was way out of his way. So I'm sure he would have gotten cherry if it were there, right?

Well, maybe it's more like an either/or situation with the Seven and the Eleven in which one number is the cherry and the other is the strawberry . Maybe they are mutually exclusive

As we've already seen though, it's Will who is already associated with cherries via association of Billy which in turn can only mean one thing

Eleven is the strawberry

But

In the end there is no difference. Cherry and strawberry taste the same. They are the same. Just sugar on ice

But what's a strawberry anyway?

Source

First of all of this goes with the Will Byers has DID theory.

For the longest time I was convinced that Will created Eleven on the day he vanished in the woods but I don't think that's what has happened any longer. I think she was there long before. Ready to take over whenever Will needed her to use her superpowers to absorb what he couldn't face.

That's why Eleven is a strawberry. She was there ready to save Will whenever Lonnie sold off his son to buy dr*gs. It's why there is still a cola next the cherry in the 7-Eleven. Coca-Cola or just coke. Other sources also say that a Strawberry is a woman who willingly sells se*ual favors to buy dr*gs. (although willingly is hardly the word I would use here)

In the beginning of the first season El could barely speak and was more like a child who didn't understand anything. This was also done for her protection throughout the years I think. The less she understood what happened, the better it is for her (or so the reasoning goes)

But she still understood the most important part