#i spent a lot of frickin time of this

[daisyblog]

Cousin Love

Our Story Masterlist Summary: Freddie meets Grace.

Based on this request.

With Freddie living in America with his Mum majority of the year, YN and Harry would try to fly out and visit as much as they could. But having a newborn and trying to find their path in parenthood, meant it wasn’t that easy to go and see their nephew as often.

They would love for Freddie to meet Grace, as FaceTime just wasn’t enough. But with Louis’ work schedule, it wasn’t possible. So YN accepted that weekly FaceTimes would have to do until they could fly out to the US.

The Styles family were having a quiet morning, allowing the time to slip by as they ate breakfast together, drank cups of tea and coffee, and importantly had lots of cuddles on the sofa.

The buzzer to the outside gate, caught their ears as they wondered who unexpectedly was dropping byHarry was surprised when he saw Louis’ face on the camera, not realising he was back in London.

“It’s Louis!” Harry called to YN letting her know her brother was here.

“Oh! It’s Uncle Louis”. Grace lovingly stared up at her mother, taking in everything she was saying.

Harry pressed the button to allow Louis in. Then opened the front door to wait for his arrival. But the sound of two voices, and a particular American accent caught his ears. Before he could ask any questions, Freddie ran towards him.

“Uncle Harry!”. He was quick to scoop the younger boy up into his arms and squeezing him tight to his chest.

“I’ve missed you little man!”. Freddie wrapped his arms around Harry’s shoulders, still hugging him tight. “But I know someone who’s missed you more”.

“Auntie YN!”.

Harry led Louis and Freddie to where YN and Grace were in the large cosy living area. “Auntie YN…guess who I’ve found!”.

YN’s eyes almost popped out at the sight of her oldest nephew in her husbands arms. She jumped up from her place and opened her arms wide for him. “Freddie!”.

Freddie ran towards her and almost tackled her as he wrapped his arms around her, YN’s arms doing the same. “I’ve missed you Auntie YN!”.

“Not as much as I’ve missed you my boy!”. She didn’t want to let go but there was someone else who YN wanted Freddie to meet. Grace was laying on a large Playmat, small toys surrounding her. “Freddie this is little Grace…and Grace this is your big cousin Freddie”.

Louis watched as he sat on the sofa, his son gently holding onto Grace’s hand as he softly spoke to her. Picking up some of the toys around her to play with her. Trying his best to make her smile as he made silly faces.

“Why does she look like you?”. Freddie asked YN who was still sat next to him. Harry let out a chuckle at the question, something they get told regularly is that Grace is the image of YN.

“The same reason you look like your Dad”. YN explained, as she glanced at Louis. “The Tomlinson genes are just too strong”.

“You can say that again”. Harry sent YN a cheeky smirk.

Freddie had spent most of the morning by Grace’s side, knowing he may not see her for a while again. He was laid to down next to her on the large blanket, his little finger rubbing down her nose gently as her eyes grew tired.

Harry had gone to the kitchen to prepare them all lunch. But YN was now sat next to Louis as he swung his arm around her shoulder for a sibling cuddle. They watched their babies together, watching in awe at how loving and gentle Freddie was being with Grace.

“Why do I feel like we’re having a glimpse of what we were like as kids?”. YN asked as her eyes saw Freddie gently place a small blanket back over Grace who had kicked it off.

Louis smiled finding the loving moment between the cousins sweet. “Because you are…I literally adored you as a baby…well I still do, you’re just a bit more annoying now”. Louis teased.

“Hey!”.

“I’m joking…I can’t wait to see all our kids grow up together like we did”. Louis smiled.

“Family full of love!”.

Tag List:

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[brn-t]

Thermotropism

TAGS:

eyy where my plant fuckers at? 👀🌱🌿 you can read it on AO3 here

I don’t think I should have taken this plant home…

Like, when I saw it baking in the sun in that alley outside my building, it’d looked like it had a lot of potential! It was all shriveled but the leaves branched out from a thick basal stem like a monstera almost and there were these bright red blotches on its roots that looked super cool!

When I brought it in (heavy!!) I could tell just by looking how root bound it was, so I popped it out of it’s cheap decorative planter (poor thing was probably never repotted) and yup, there were more roots than dirt.

I had no idea what the hell it was. Inatural had no frickin clue. It looked like a tropical plant with it’s broad green leaves and knobbly aerial roots, but the ground roots were so thick they looked like tubers!! 

I have to admit I was fascinated, but I should have gotten rid of it then…

It spent uh, a couple weeks underneath my shitty little plant light, the one in my room. I was quarantining it in there until I knew it didn’t have any critters on it, but it seemed happy with its repotting and daily soakings for the most part.

The thing really liked water

Like, I started off watering it once a week, and it did perk up, but it didn’t really change much until I started dousing it every morning before work.

And man when it started goin off, it really went off.

It seemed like every time I came home it had sent out a new aerial root or new leaf! The thing was voluptuous as hell! When it got too big for my pathetic little plant light I moved it to the window sill next to my bed. 

It was kinda nice! Like a natural blind or something once it got its runners going up the screen.

I didn’t mind, it was always hot as hell in my little apartment and my landlord couldn’t be arsed to install an AC. I just had to be careful not to accidentally crawl over the little shoots it was sending out all over when I got into bed.

I guess where I fucked up is when I found out about.. its uh.. nutrient preferences

I swear it was a complete accident the first time!! 

I had just gotten home from another 10 hr day and I was tired and smelly and needed to jerk off pronto. I hosed myself down and threw myself into bed, still steaming from trying to scrub off the smell of fried food from my skin, and cracked open my laptop.

Now, fun fact, there's this thing that plants do where they move towards things. Most of the time its towards light, but they can also be attracted to heat! It’s called thermotropism. So I dunno if it was the heat from my ancient laptop or the steam off my skin, but just as I'm about to nut I feel something brush against the head of my dick.

It took me so much by surprise that I came right there, frickin coating a leaf in my jizz. The thing had turned completely around from facing the window above my bed to nearly touching me with its broad soft leaf.

Even for a tropical plant that’s shockingly mobile.

So I cleaned it off as best I could but I guess some of my spunk got absorbed into the soil, I dunno, I passed out shortly after that. I didn’t wake up until nearly nine o clock the next morning because the room was still completely dark thanks to the density of the wall of leaves covering my window. The plant had frickin doubled in size and the terracotta pot I had repotted it in had some fresh cracks in it where the aerial roots were exploding out through.

I didn’t have time to freak out about it since I was once again late to work, but I gotta admit, I was digging the jumanjI vibes it brought to my otherwise very dull room 

So.. I may have started jerking off into it every night?

What! It’s like, natural fertilizer, or whatever!! And the plant seemed to like it? 

I even got it to flower!! It started putting out these crazy flower stalks that closed up during the day but unfurled at night giving off this crazy floral fragrant scent.

It made me remember being a kid and running around in the woods behind my stepdads rental cabin, so I let it keep spreading.

I realize now, this was not the smartest idea, but fuck it, my landlord all but explicitly told me I wasn’t getting the deposit back unless I sued him for it so when it started putting its roots into the drywall, I let it.

It was nice honestly, coming home after seeing nothing but concrete grey for hours and then throwing myself into my little tropical nest. And the smell of the flowers really set the mood when I was jerkin it.

Embarrassingly I think my mind started associating the smell with orgasm because I swear I walked past a florist shop the other day and had to walk bowlegged to the 7D train.

The trouble really started when it started sending its roots in my direction .

Now, I ain’t proud of it, but I more often than not just sleep on a bare mattress. Its got one of those memory foam layers on top and I just couldn’t be bothered to put a fitted sheet on it half the time.

So when I started feeling a bump underneath me as I lay in bed, I just thought it was like, a sock  or something that had gotten shoved underneath there, nbd, until that night… 

I was feeling particularly pent up and kept grinding my ass against that spot on the mattress. I don’t know why I did it, I just wanted more friction and the blooms on the ceiling above me were gettin me wound up with their heavy fragrance. Anyway, it feels like there's a soft tear below me and suddenly something hard and Wide and cold is pressing right against my gooch.

I kinda jump (because it’s cold!!) and look down to find that the frickin plant has grown into the mattress !!

And it was a fat root too, no idea how I didn’t notice it more earlier.

It was kindof freaky to be honest how fast it had grown, the thing really must have liked my semen, but at that point with how humid the room was and how dizzy the flowers were making me feel… I went with it.

 I ground my ass into it and when the thick ridge popped in past my ring I swear I came harder than I ever have in my life dude

I felt like I blacked out a little at the end there because the next thing I knew, it was morning and I'm absolutely painted in my own cum. I guess at this point I should have realized what was going on but I think the pollen those flowers were putting out were scrambling my brains a little. When I woke up, there was a network of thin bright red roots crisscrossing my body, sending out these feathery little things, absorbing the frankly ludicrous amounts of cum I had shot out last night. They pulled at my skin a little as I tore them off but part of me was still a little horny. So I cleared them away and and pulled out my phone.

Fuck it, right? It was my day off and I had no responsibilities that day anyway.

I just rolled over and started going to town on my morning wood.

My ass twitched around something and that's when I noticed...

The fuckin root was still in my ass from last night!!!

I'm trying to use one hand to milk my dick while the other one shoots down in between my legs and sure enough, that fuckin root had buried itself who knows how deep! I tried in vain to pull the thing out, but it was rooted in the mattress after all and didn’t budge. So, humiliatingly, I had to pull myself off of it.

I have to admit, I came a little just from feeling how much of it was inside of me, there was a good 7 inches of thick knobby root dragged out of me, grinding against my prostate as I pulled myself off of it.

I just lay there breathless, staring at the root, sticking straight up out out of my mattress now that it was no longer buried in my ass. My inner walls twitched and contracted, trying to close around the space it had carved out in me.

I guess I still had some sense then because I did actually prune the plant after that

I pulled the root out of my ruined mattress and trimmed all the stalks and roots near my bed. I started jerking off in the bathroom and yea the leaves wilted a bit but that was too much for me, you know?

Well, I don’t know if plants can get pissed but I must have pissed this one off because it responded to me suddenly not “fertilizing” it by sending out these little sticky climbers that got everywhere.

I woke up one morning to the fuckers wrapped around my tiny nipples. I went to sit up and yelped because they got yanked by the fuckin things, pulling my chest to the side. I tried to pull it off as delicately as I could, but the thin stems snapped in half, bleeding a reddish sort of liquid all over my chest!

It sort of burned but I just yelled at the plant, wiped it off and got dressed for work.

Now, I don’t know if I was allergic or something, but for the rest of that day my nipples stayed hard and puffy, poking out visibly from underneath my thin uniform shirt and earning more than a few snickers from the girls up front.

Good thing I had a vacation week coming up.

It had been asked for months in advance, and was the first one I’d had in a decade. I was supposed to drive out to the lake across the state to hang with a buddy of mine at his parents bougie lake house. Well, that night was the night before I was due to head out, and I went to bed in my travel clothes so I could just pop out of bed in the morning. Not wanting to ruin my clothes, I watered the Plant like usual and saved the jerking for when I got to my buddies place.

I was just on the edge of unconsciousness when I felt something moving up my shirt sleeve. I couldn’t tell if I was dreaming it or not so I just laid there, feeling the thing slowly snake its way up to my chest, resting on the sensitive swollen bud there 

I only really tried to react when I felt a second tendril branch out from the first and start oozing that same irritating sap over my OTHER nipple!

Groggily I straightened up, falling for the same headphones on the doorknob trap as last time, but this time it felt a lot better.

My nips hadn't really gone down since that last time so when they got yanked I thought a yelp of pain was what was gonna come out of my mouth, so imagine my surprise when a full bodied moan slipped out instead.

I immediately got super red in the face and yanked off my shirt.

This, unfortunately, snapped the thin tendrils stem, causing it to bleed more of its spicy sap all along my side and chest as I shucked off my shirt.

It left an angry red trail of raised sensitive skin, swelling my nipples far beyond what was normal, and they stuck out of my chest like two puffy toilet plungers out from my swelling pecs.

I tried to pull the tendrils off of them but they were too tight and my nipples were too big now.

I looked up from groping my chest to see how many of the plant’s flowers had opened up above me, showering me in who knows what.

I couldn’t take it anymore, I was openmouth panting, inhaling the perfume and palming my shorts which had at some point started to fill out. I ripped my shorts off too, and only after a few strokes realized how deeply I had just fucked up

If you guessed “that idiot just smeared a sap he’s clearly allergic to all over the most sensitive part of his body” you would be correct...

I was howling in pain as it started to burn, but after a minute or two I was thrusting into the air and moaning like a whore, the fire had turned into an electric storm of pleasure.

My dick was swelling way past normal hardness and I could only continue to try and fuck the hell out of my hand.

It was entirely too humid in that room, everything felt wet and sticky, so when I came finally, I barely even felt it on me

I screamed so loud the neighbors probably thought I was dying I probably did die a little... I think I shot into my own mouth at one point??  I collapsed immediately after, and when I woke in the morning, the whole plant looked shiny and glossy, like it was gloating over the fact it’d gotten me to come for it yet again.

I know it was just a plant but I got mad

I jumped out of bed, completely ignoring the tendrils still wrapped around my nips, put a thick jacket over my shirt and left the room with my suitcase while flipping it the bird.

I felt bad that I would be gone for a week but I’d set it up with a slow release watering pitcher, so I figured it’d be fine without me.

What I didn’t plan on was how I would do without it.

What should have been a great vacation turned into the worst case of blueballs seen this side of the Mississippi.

Not only did my nipples constantly pulse and throb against the tendrils, but I found out later when I went to go use the bathroom that one had slipped around the base of my dick as well, which had also refused to recede back to its normal size. The woody chord was a bit thicker and it wrapped around the base and balls, completely blocking any and all attempts to even get hard.

So instead of focusing on the boat ride or my friends stupid alcohol choices, I was stuck in a constant struggle of being aroused by my throbbing nipples and being unable to address it at all. I was actually filled with relief when the final day came and I was saying goodbye to my hosts.

I flew home after that in my tiny little beater car, shifting uncomfortably at my seatbelt rubbing directly against my chest. I practically kicked the door in, shedding all my clothes in a line to my bedroom and threw myself into bed.

I yelped when I landed on several thick somethings beneath my body creak under my weight, poking me through the thin layer of foam.

The Plant was the worst I’d seen it since I brought it home, with several dead leaves deposited on the bed and an explosion of fuzzy white runners running the length of that bedroom wall.

The roots jabbed into me like it had planned this.

“Ow!” I’d said, “ I'm sorry ok? I just needed a break!”

As a response, I watched a giant cream white flower slowly expand and burst open, sending a shower of shimmery yellow pollen floating down directly over my face.

Things uh, got a little out of hand after that…

The tendrils had finally loosened enough around my dick to where I could pull them off but that just led to all my pent up semen literally dumping into my balls as soon as the tie was removed. I moaned as I could physically feel them growing heavier as a weeks worth of pent up jizz dropped into my balls. They felt like leaden weights.

It was almost painful how quickly I got hard, and it didn’t take more than a stroke or two before I was yelling and releasing said load all over myself and the plant.

You could visibly see it perk up, opening up more buds, showering me with pollen and dusting the bed. The two substances got mixed by my frantic motions and soon I was lightly cheeto dusted with the stuff,

My skin was on fire but it also.. uh, felt really good somehow... So once the high of the first orgasm died down, it wasn't long before I was rarin to go for a second round.

I palmed my recovering erection and was just about fully hard when I felt it.

Again, at my ass!! Was one of the plant’s thick basal roots!! Except this one looked a little weird..

First off it was tremendously thick, about the width of my wrist, and secondly it was covered in all these little backwards facing ridges, like a drywall sink

Man, I don’t know what wires go crossed but between the way my ass was twitching and the pollen I was huffing, I put my ass right against that thing

It must have reacted to my bodyheat because it felt like as I was pressing down on it, the thing was pushing into me as well.

It was intense, there was no give to its turgid walls, so I had to stretch myself out around it to get it past my ring.

Once it was properly seated inside me I started going to town on my dick, which at this point was leaking like my kitchen sink maintenance had refused to address for weeks.

I swear I could feel the root get deeper and deeper inside me as I jerked and spasmed around it I was panting and moaning like a bitch, I can’t believe how horny I was

at some point I felt something at my mouth and wouldn’t you know it, an equally thick tuber had been drawn to my hot breath and was poking at the corner of my lips

I was way past the point of rational thoughts at that point, I just leaned forward and let it creep into my mouth.

The further it got the hotter I felt. My tongue swiped across the underside and that’s when I tasted something sweet

Was this root leaking sap??

Turns out the itchy nectar tasted amazing so I ended up suckling it as I frantically jerked my dick. The root inside my ass had reached my prostate at that point and thats when things got really hazy for me.

I remember exploding all over myself, I would have been screaming if not for the thick root tunneling its way down my throat

I was jerking and spasming to the best of my ability but the roots were getting a little out of control, they were budding from the base of the main roots and expanding all over my body, and every couple of inches they would plant a sticky little node like a command strip onto my skin and keep going, until I could barely move.

The only part that hadn’t been covered was my right arm, which was moving too fast jerking myself off for the tendrils to colonize.

The root in my mouth seemed to expand further, and suddenly I realized that I could still breath despite it feeling like it had reached my guts almost.

My tongue felt a small hole on the underside and sure enough, I could breath just fine.

Good thing too because that’s when I noticed the two thinner roots making their way up my nose, expanding into my nostrils and plugging them completely.

The root in my ass must have had the same idea...

At this point I was slowly starting to realize, like, “oh shit, I really can’t move” and started trying to pull things off of me to escape bu t I honestly couldn’t budge. My left arm was completely rooted to the mattress and my right arm couldn’t be lifted above my waist, just enough to reach my dick but not enough to reach my face.

Leaves were starting to branch out from the tendrils, and with them came more flowers.

They were visibly crawling all over me now, moving fast enough for me to track with my eyes, and I watched in horror as several thin tendrils spiraled up my cock.

I wish I could have broken away but I was quite literally rooted to the spot watching these tendrils poke at my leaking pisshole and worm their way inside.

I screamed and cried but the progress was unceasing, it steadily tunneled into my dick until it hit the base and pinched my prostate against the root in my ass, which at this point must have reached high up into my guts.

I screamed against the root as I came, but no semen escaped my completely plugged dick.

I could feel it making its way inside my through my internal passages, rooting itself straight into my balls, 

At that point I really did pass out, whether from lack of oxygen or overstimulation I couldn’t tell.

Well, I'm awake now and I am utterly fucked, the roots have expanded into nearly every available orifice, even trying to fill out my belly button and uh.. they might have broken through the skin...

I can see ridges beneath my skin.. little hard lines were they’ve penetrated me.

I'm being constantly milked and I can’t even move as they constantly grind against the inside of my cock

I'm not even thirsty or anything, the liquid being drip-fed down my throat fills me up and I'm just kept in a constant state of bliss.

I dunno what to do bro, I have my phone but even texting is getting hard with one hand and roots slowly crawling down my fingers…

you’re the only one close enough to me, theres a key underneath the mat..

you gotta help me man before it's too la

[reverseexorcist]

Hello, can we get Sera x Winner!Reader?

The reader has hipdips, because I'm so frickin' gay and I got hipdips.

Unsure what form this would be, you can choose how to write it^^

❥ 𝐌𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐃𝐨𝐯𝐞 ❥

Boy I am sure a sucker for the twevle foot tall maybe but probably not homicidal seraphim. She's just so gaslight gatekeep girlfail, y'know? (Also I just love old testament style angels in general <3)

➲ Sera+ !F!Winner!Reader

➲ Romantic ☒, Platonic ☐

➲ 𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 Count; 1,776 Words

➲ Warnings/notes; Bird tendancies for both Sera and the reader (nesting, preening, cooing), very fluffy, I just think she's really pretty, me when I saw Sera fr, slight hint of angst (exterminations), but with lots of fluffy comfort

Clouds fogged the window, the glow of the setting sun and edging indigo of the approaching night sky ebbing behind cotton fluff as the first few array of sparkling stars blipped to life. The wind chimes outside the pearly kitchen window swung softly, almost inaudible in the faint breeze - Despite the twining height of the heaven-sent spire, the topmost dwellings of the holy realm were at peace from the harshest of the winds, mostly because they didn't actually exist in such a utopian place.

You exhaled, wiping your hands messily across the front of your apron before returning to the simmering pot on the stove. The smells that wafted out from it were incredible, mouth-watering even. It was a new recipe you'd gotten from your seraphim sister-in-law, Emily, after your last dinner party, claiming it to be one of Sera's favourites, which was all the allure you needed

Sunset. Sera's workday was almost over.

You found it kind've unfair that even amongst the afterlife, there were certain angels that still had to work. There were volunteer jobs sure, something to keep peoples' hands busy so they didn't die again from boredom. But, you hummed as you thought, someone had to keep this place running neatly, and the heavenborn seemed made for this time (which, y'know, they probably were.)

It didn't make you any less salty about it, though. Winner pairs had every single hour of their artificial days to spend time together if they so desired, wandering around the bright metropolitan cities and the mellow, enchanting countrysides, and yet you and Sera spent most of your days apart. And then, you remembered with a rather sour twinge, on her rare scheduled day off a trial of utmost importance had popped up.

Marble crumbled underneath your strengthening grip on the counter, cracking pitifully before tumbling in a fine dust on to the floor. 'Whoops' - With pursed lips you waved your hands, angelic light seeling the cracks and repairing the damage you'd inadvertantly caused within seconds.

Outside noises drew your attention, a chorus of wingbeats fluttered down to the door, a holy sound so synonymous with Sera and her six wings that had you perking up immediately. Firm, yet you could tell even from the kitchen window that something was wearing on her. From the way you heard the falter before her landing and the uneased rustling of angelic feathers, there was a sort've weight to every single one of her movements that made your heart worry. Your own wings flexed nervously as you made your way over to the doorway.

Sera was already inside, brushing her dress down and picking at a few loose feathers clinging to the swoop of her neck, preening. Her brow was furrowed, probably in thought if her perpetual thinking lines meant anything, but there was a certain dullness in her pearlescent eyes.

Now you were definitely worried.

Even as you neared, it was the eyes on her crownpiece the swivelled to face you first, then the ones that dotted her enormous wings. It was only then did she sigh and turn to you with the smallest of smiles.

Tired was one word to describe her expression.

The seraphim's arms were wrapped around her middle, wings tucked tightly to her back and anxiously puffed up, the very epitome of 'something's definitely not right'. Which was certainly not something anyone ever thought of when imagining the the high seraphim Sera. And that in of itself was the problem - To see such a confident, caring and durable figure of authority so down in the dumps. But, more importantly, it made your heart bleed to see your life-partner so gloomy and still trying her hardest to not let it show (and obviously failing, which really only made you more fidgety.)

"Sera?" You tried to peer in her eyes, to gauge her emotions. She sighed through her nose, spreading her wings half-heartedly and crouching down more to your height, cooing softly like a dove. Delving into her warmth, you nuzzled against the silken fabric of her dress, wings brushing against wings as her feathers gently encased you in a warm hug. The feel of her slender fingers threading across your face, trailing down your neck till they rested on the fluff of your wing joints, rolling the downy, warm feathers gently between her forefingers as the eyes decorating her body slowly blinked closed, the tension in her shoulders slowly melting away as you returned her light touches. Trailing across her shoulders, through the sleek feathers decorating her shoulders and collarbone - Shiny like crystal, yet softer than clouds.

Sera hugged you a little tighter, palms rubbing circles on your back tenderly, holding you wholly within her much bigger being. The gentle weight of her head rested atop yours, nosing around. Bergamot and chamomile swept over you, sweet and citrusy with a hint of spice that clung to Sera's feathers, now shifted to your delicate plumage.

However, you could still feel the rigid anxiety flexing through her wings. As tightly as they hugged you to the tall seraphim's chest, they were taut and strained, not free and sleek like they usually felt with every hug. And as much as you wanted to ask, something told you that she'd reveal everything with time - Despite the sore subject of truthfulness between the two of you at the beginning of your relationship, it was something she'd worked on diligently over the hundred or so years you'd been paired.

"Sera, hun, you're tense," You murmured into her breastbone, "go relax, have a shower. Dinner's almost ready."

She seemed so reluctant to let you free of her grasp, feathers fluffing as you slowly pulled away. Lithe, long fingers trailed from your back muscles down your sides, tracing the dip in your hips back and forth. WIth a playful sigh, you pressed one kiss to her throat, then another on her jawline with a third and final smooch on the tip of her nose. Content, a faint coo warbled from her throat, eyes slipped closed before you peeled yourself away. Much to her dismay.

"Supper's on the stove! We can cuddle more after dinner," You flicked your wingtips, amused at the almost puppyish look of longing on Sera's face. Confusion creased the white flecks framing her eyes, and she wrung her fingers together before ultimately raising herself up to her full height, feet floating ever so slightly off the floor as she shuffled into the adjacent dining room (as much as one could shuffle when their feet weren't touching the floor, that is.)

Emily was right - The tired, worried, anxious look traced on Sera's face disappeared as you placed her bowl down before her, even more so when you sidled up next to her. Tentatively, her smallest wing reached out as it usually did, feathers tapping softly against your arm and own wings before wrapping around your shoulders. Satisfied with at least being in contact, dinner was enjoyed in a peaceful silence.

Outside, the windchimes danced in the breeze.

Your nest felt startlingly empty without Sera curled around you.

It was a feeling you never thought you'd get uesd to, and you always felt so small picking your way through the carefully placed plush walls, ducking your head under the twining fabric that hung from above creating an almost dome-like ceiling to shield the light of the moon away from your eyes. Sparse inside, but incredibly soft and warm to the touch, you found yourself practically sinking into the mattress, two silken pillows tucked comfortably underneath you.

Sera herself had perched herself right on the edge, one wing (the biggest one) spread out in front of her, fingers working swiftly yet thoroughly, plucking loose feathers out and righting crooked ones. Your own fingers were doing something similar with another one of her smaller wings, tentatively carding through her well-kempt plume.

The look was back, and her thoughts seemed so far away. Eyes aglow in the dim light, the stripe down her nose crinkled ever so slightly as she silently mulled something over and over in her mind.

Your fingers faltered, and she peered over her shoulder and down to where you were curled up at her side, wings sprawled over the nest like another blanket.

She held your gaze, and finally spilled those words that had been gnawing at her mind.

"They…" She opened her mouth, then closed it as if considering her next words very carefully. "Everyone knows."

You tilted your head, but with the way what you now realised was guilt had spread over her face, you knew exactly what she was talking about.

The exterminations were a contentious topic between the two of you - It almost caused you two to split within the first decade of your relationship, and it wasn't a subject you liked to think about all too often.

There was a part of you that felt vindicated. Heaven deserved to know the truth with how extreme the whole operation was, especially seeing as the exorcists just lived in and around the general public without anyone knowing, preaching about love and peace just like everybody else.

But, you knew the guilt Sera had been carrying ever since she'd made the decision. You'd had your fair share of fights that lead to one of you sleeping elsewhere at night, or even escalating to the point you returned back to your apartment for a few days just to cool off. And you'd worked past all that. Difficult, yes, but Sera was your life partner and you loved her with all your heart. Maybe in the future you'd be able to convince her to start a redemption program, like many had suggested in the past, but for now you just opened your wings and shuffled as the seraphim joined you in your joint nest.

Now it was perfect, nestled up in to crook of her neck amonst her downy feathers, indigo and gold as the night sky sat firmly outside. Blankets strewn over your legs, giant wings wrapped around your entire body - This was your personal heaven.

Sera's hands fell to your hips, thumbs rubbing against the gentle dips as her head braced against yours, dove-ish coos escaping her with every breath puffed form her nose. She was already fast asleep curled around you, all the weight now lifted from her shoulders for the time being, wings perfectly preened and delicately soft, perfect for cuddling.

Your own wings were cleaned too, a pleasant buzz tingling from where Sera had traced her loving fingers.

Chamomile tea, citrus and chashmere, soft feathers tickled your nose, and yet you couldn't find it in yourself to care.

Rules + Info,

Masterlist,

[a-suspicious-number-of-ducks]

Hermit-a-Day May, day 25: ImpulseSV. Today's style/medium is Netflix's Arcane! This took. so much rendering. I kinda phoned it in on the outfit but I think I'm allowed given how much gosh darn time I spent on his face. While this isn't my favorite of the pieces I've finished this month, I am frickin proud of the rendering because I've never tried a portrait this detailed before, let alone one in an entirely different style from my own. References and details under the read more!

Okay I have a lot of references for this one. I referenced Jayce most heavily, with a couple shots of Vi for facial details and Vander for the beard.

I also referenced this picture of IRL Impulse for some of the facial details, particularly the shape of his nose and how he styles his hair.

The background is a screenshot taken from the beginning of Impulse's "Ready. Set. Go!" Hermitcraft episode (e16), which can be found here.

I'm a weird mixture of grumpy and really pleased with this piece? Without disparaging my art skills, I do think that this was a big push out of my comfort zone. I learned a lot, but because of that, there's also a lot I would do differently if I ever attempted this style again--and I definitely still have even more to learn. Curse you, continuous improvement and growth. /lh

[moonstruckdraws]

Ares

I think this is a good time to say that idk how to draw dudes or buffer muscles on any character lol. Though drawing mutant turtles for over a year did help

That being said, I also don't know armor and tried to make it as fun for me as possible. And to be honest, I do like how this came out. Regardless this is really an excuse to draw him with Aphrodite....

I am without a doubt an Ares fan as of now. Learning about him has been so fun and interesting. I haven't delve into too many myths with any of the gods I plan to draw, as I just wanted their titles, symbols, and what they rule over to decide how to draw them, but still read a bit. (I learned about Aphrodite Areia and what epithets were over the weekend so I am freaking out internally. I already want to redesign/tweak Aphrodite's design lol)

Alright, moving on to design choice, this took forever to make. I had a board for Ares, like the rest, in ideas or concepts or images I thought were cool, but I had no idea what to draw for literally two hours. Just starin' at my screen. And then I spent another two hours just on his frickin helmet lol. So I made the bottom of the helmet turn up in spikes to kinda-very loosely-be like boar tusks. The helmet itself is like a vulture head with pseudo eyes.

I gave him a cape that starts at the vulture's head, and it's specifically a bearded vulture because they look insanely cool and crazy. It blinks when he does and looks around. Is it alive? Is it its own being or a second pair of Ares's eyes for his blind spots? Idk :] The ends are messed up because war, yadda yadda, probably gets set on fire a lot somehow. And is always bloody.

I didn't know what to do with the waist, so to try and incorporate the boar more, I first added big tusks, but they just ended up looking like teeth, so I wrapped them around his waist entirely. I added the pelvic curtain for flare, but now it makes it look like a tongue and I think that's cool, as if his stomach would just open into a gorey mouth or something.

Snakes, like Athena, are also associated with Ares. And because another symbol of his is the flaming torch, I thought it'd be cool if his hair turned to flaming snakes when angered. Not inferno levels of hot, because I didn't want him to be so elemental, just a little fire. In execution, I'm not sold on it, so it'll probably change. I'll probably put some snake design on his boots as they lookin' bland (I don't like drawing shoes).

Last thing is his face! I want the war gods to have their faces blocked out because they wear their helmets so much. I feel like keeping their faces hidden this way was so normal that they unintentionally morphed their faces to be this way. Ares's eyes would be closed the majority of the time his helmet is off, barely opening them at most probably, to keep that sharp look. With Athena, I plan for hers to almost always be open, like an owl constantly watching.

I feel like he feels a bit too human to me, which isn't a bad thing, but not exactly what I want. Maybe he'll get winged ears to be more vulture? And idea I had was for his cape to actually be his wings, so maybe I'll do that?

[formulatrash]

i'm trying really hard to like oscar because he honestly seems like a cool dude and his humor has really endeared him to me lately. plus very hot driving. but oh my god the way his fans have already entered staniel-level delusions of "they're sabotaging oscar to make lando look good! unfair treatment! british bias!" is kind of leaving a sour taste in my mouth to the point where i have to enjoy him in my own little circles of the internet because noooope. i've spent enough time with the f1 australian drivers's fans hatred of lando norris to get sucked back in again. at least this time it's just lando they're harassing and not like tom stallard and mental health organizations and such but it's really fucking annoying.

god I forgot about the Daniel fans vs Mind thing 💀 there are so many ways to be embarrassed to be an F1 fan

I feel like a lot of the people shilling conspiracy theory stuff about Oscar aren't actually Oscar fans, they're Lando haters. Lando's teammate could be Logan Sargeant or idk, Fernando frickin Alonso and they'd be acting the same.

Oscar isn't being sabotaged. he's developing as a driver. he is in his second season. McLaren can't really take strategic risks at all because uh, their maths is not great or whatever is going on there but they especially can't with Oscar because he's still learning how to do things like manage the tyres to the extremes of performance. that's not a criticism of Oscar, Lando took years to learn it too. it's just that he has now, so when the pit wall gets wild with new ways to fuck up a win they can give Lando the slightly higher risk one, knowing he can make the stints work and remain competitive. because this is his fifth year.

obviously they still botched that completely with the softs on Sunday and Lando can beat himself up about it all he wants (and oh boy he will) but tyre calls should come from the team not the drivers, unless it's like "do you think you can stay out another lap."

Oscar's doing incredible. he can and will (and was, last weekend) be in contention for race wins but in Oscar's own interests he will have different strategies from Lando in order to maximise his own capacity for tyre management. actually sabotaging Oscar would be being unrealistic about that and leaving him to flounder.

his overtake on Lewis in the wet was very lovely. excellent bit of driving, could have played out to decide the race win if it wasn't for [yakkity sax plays through the wall from the next room]

[mimikoolover]

are people being rude about JK again?

no I was just thinking about how different jeju was compared to the other trips and realised the reason he was mad (jimin siding with tae) was very telling in my opinion. I think jungkook loves tae and loves going on trips with him but it's so frickin obvious he wanted these trips with jimin only and he was kind of on edge when vmin were off doing their own thing, and at the end he was actually getting mad which is uncharacteristic from him around jimin if you look at CT and Japan. I think overall taekook spent more time together than vmin last year so it was great that at the beginning of the trip vmin could hang out but by the end I think tae may have cottoned on and let jikook spend more time together, when lowkey the change in jungkook was massive (he was a lot happier/relaxed when it was just him and jimin imo and I think it's because these trips were meant to be jikook only in the first place).

[oaticedeggshells]

Jake And Amir

I spent way too long on this (watching every J&A video I could without putting too much effort in). When I've watched them one-off, I noticed a couple of instances of the following, so decided to see how widespread it was:

Is Amir from Jake and Amir a trans woman? No, probably not. But I still have my suspicions.

truth or dare: Amir "Time to meet some babe magnets" Jake "That's guys" Amir "Or lesbians"

Shopping: Jake "That's all the same women's sweater"

Fashion Tips: just watch this one.

Disease: Amir "and I'm not wearing women's shoes"

Video chat: Amir "like two civilised ladies"

Private Eye Part 1: "Best Supporting Actress"

Baby: I've forgotten the plot of this one

Girlfriend Pt7: Amir texting Leronuh "You made me feel like a woman again"

Trick or Treat: I might have marked this down just because of how Amir is dressed?

Powder, Fashion Blog, Boot Camp

Scrapped: Jake "You photoshopped a vagina onto yourself and you're masturbating?"

Costume, Brownie

Chugging: There's some reference to tucking?

Blood Donation: Jake "You came here in a skirt"

Reddit: "Dickless for Michael Chiklis"

Seminar: <image>

Doobs 3

March Madness 6: Amir "I'm gonna wear a gown to the final 4"

Costumes Part 2: Jake "Your crotch is bleeding"

Thanksgiving Scroll: Amir refers to themselves as queer

Breakfast Date: you're wearing a dress

Road Trip 2 (New Orleans): You have such saggy naturals

Poster Ideas: I'm not a businessman, I'm a businesswoman

Driving Lesson: queen dweeb

NY vs LA: What should us little sister friends gab about next?

Online Shopping: *queefs*

Serial: *wearing a thong*

Finale: bottom surgery

Donald Trump: "grab my pussy in joy"

Unrelatedly, gullies isn't a real world? And I've always used 'talking smack about Jeff' to mean shooting the breeze, not being rude to someone called Jeff. And a couple of quotes I'd forgotten:

"The pets are at work", "Work?", "Oh, you've never seen a rat be a chef before?", "That was a cartoon", "Yes, but a dog animated it".

"I got caught doing a 90 in a 0."

"waterboarding me with so much haterade"

The best bars:

sitting in jacuzzis // peanut butters smoothies // eating lots of movies // checking out the movies

all day, every day, every hour, gotta have a chicken nugget in my pocket gower

because you pale in comparison to Sarah

I spent last week in a hospital // What I thought was Flintstone vitamins was actually a birth control // and I shouldn't have drunk the whole botty-bottle

Just a little queasy // I should take it easy

1 2 3 4 if you're on a boat then you're paddling // horse then you're saddling // if you're on the stage then your name better be Bradlyn

Zip it, zip it good. Exhibit A.

First clue me. George clue me.

I'd consider it // because I'm considerate // now consider this // you prissy bis

I don't eat meat // I don't eat wheat // I don't eat treats // Now take a seat

Just give me my old scroll bag backpack back please

I love to yearn // I love to learn // I love to make money

That cool cat thinks he can hot dog

I'm not going to let some quack in a van hack me up in a can

I'm looking at one listing which is particularly cherry // though on the contrary // it might be an apple because it is that of my eye

Bros propose before hoes

It happened by chance // happenstance // it happens Nance

Yam plan thank you mam

You want one from a mean tween though? // meaner than you've ever seen // Well I've got one for you Mr.Bean

This is my baby, Bjorn, in a baby bjorn. Guess what day he was bjorn.

You're the only one with the capacity for such tenacity and audacity but more than anything I admire your veractiy.

To strike me like you did showed a lack of tact and you came off like a classless act and that's the facts Jack. Alright, I appreciate your attempt to mediate and alleviate hat you're done to me to date, but it's a little too little too lat.e

Chicken wings? // I love those frickin' things

Murph, Murph // It's your turf // Come down to Earth // you crazy Smurf

Washing is fine, it's drying that's trying. A clothes line? That takes time.

[mncein]

Chaewon's reaction to you dancing Antifragile

le sserafim's kim chaewon x female!reader ☁️

After Le Sserafim released Antifragile, you knew it was a masterpiece since your girlfriend, Chaewon, spoiled it. Well, scrolling down on tiktok, you saw many people doing the Antifragile dance challenge and you wanted to join.

You used this opportunity to learn the dance and record while Chaewon is still at work. After a few tries on doing Yunjin's part on the chorus, you finally got it right and it was now your favorite. You did have a lot of followers since you were pretty, gorgeous and attractive. That's why Chaewon liked you.

After posting the video, your early followers already commented positive things on your video. After a few moments, your video went viral. It's because you danced so gracefully, like you're a member of Le Sserafim and professionally trained. You smiled after seeing the high views, likes and comments on your video. Satisfied, you went back to your living room excitedly waiting for Chaewon to be back.

A few moments later, you haven't heard a car park in front of your house, instead it was the door slamming open. You looked over your shoulder, there was Chaewon, looking flustered.

"What did you just do." Chaewon panted when she ran to you. You were confused, and it hits you, she saw the video.

"You saw it?" You said teasingly, it was your intention for her to see it anyway. Chaewon blushed, and nodded her head. You laughed at her cute face, cupping her cheeks, you kissed her lovingly. This is what she wanted when she got home, always.

"You're so hot while you're doing the last part." You smirked at her.

"I bet you're grateful for that dance move, and I bet it's your favorite." She slapped your shoulder playfully.

"You looked so frickin' hot doing my part, is that your favorite?" Chaewon smirked at you too.

"Hmmm.. Actually, no. I liked doing Yunjin's part." Chaewon pouted, she crossed her arms and let a small 'ew', adding a 'TW' meaning "The worst".

(Timestamp - 24 - 30. SHE'S SO CUTE GRRRR)

After that, you guys just spent time with eachother after Chaewon's hard work.

-

[1indigoisles]

I don't know why this isn't talked about much, but, among the loose ends and problems that are going to be tied up in TWP and BBOTD, the one we've least talked about is Shinyun Jung.

She is a valid problem too, y'know? And as far as The Lost Book of The White tells us, her current power is comparable to that of LUCIFER. And we know that because she said at the end of the book that her power won't be dependent on any world like Sammael depends on Diyu. That makes her more powerful and more dangerous than the frickin' Father of Demons. She is FAR from gone.

Although I think that her power would be unstable due to the lack of a dependable resource and it would also be dangerous to herself, that doesn't mean she won't do enough damage on the way down.

In one of my reblogs, there's a theory that states that Alec survived a jab from the Svefnthorn because Lucifer bent the thorn's magic. That theory is solidified by the Epilogue of LBoTW, where Sammael gathered the other Princes of Hell, to inform them about Lucifer's plan. Obviously, that means Lucifer wants to keep tabs on the leader of all Shadowhunters, right? And who better to give him personal information about him than Shinyun Jung? Who spent quite a lot of time with Alec and Magnus in RSoM.

She won't be planning on serving Lucifer, though. She'll instead concoct a partnership with him, where they both are on equal levels. In my imagination, Lucifer probably bosses the other Princes into serving Shinyun too. Irrelevant, but still. :)

I also think she's going to be a part of Lucifer taking possession over Alec, which I think was the purpose of saving Alec in the first place.

What do you guys think?

[waterwindow]

Favourite rocket jumping maps (either in aesthetics or playthrough), top 3-5 jump maps for beginners, and/or mayhaps thoughts behind/on one of your rocket jump paintings? Looks respectfully at all of the words ever

Favorite jump maps!!

Ezekiel beautiful t5 speedshot map set in SPACE with a neon aesthetic I replay it all the time. It's hard enough to challenge me still but not soul crushing so I always go back to it when i wanna relax by myself. I'd love to be able to no-fail it one day.

Spaghetti delightful t3 meme map with unique jumps and whacky textures. Includes a brutal strafe that quickly scrolls through a spaghetti recipe while you're going down. Hilarious, top tier map to take people to for the first time.

Shimano, super moody forest temple-esque t5 map with many decorative water features and a night-lit sky box. Long and difficult and beautiful, very rewarding to complete. She's a dark temptress, I dont regret the emotional hours I spent with her.

Soquete feels like Shimano's bright and playful t4 sister, a similar forest temple aesthetic with gorgeous decorative water features. Sun soaked godrays and plants and fireflies. You cycle through indoor jumps and outdoor jumps and each of them are unique and difficult. An at-times punishing t4 but a challenge you definitely don't regret.

Waves, its t3. Its dark and spooky with a KILLER abandoned aquarium aesthetic. So unique. The jumps flow together really well and its just an overall satisfactory time (though its a bit short) I met my best friend on that map back when I was just a little baby jumper so its got a lot of sentimentality just for me personally.

Oh oh oh top 5 maps for beginners.

Jump Academy 2, obviously should be number 1. At the very least the beginner courses are a MUST when youre starting out.

But outside from that, Freezeflame, Summer, Mowi, Serenity, Quattro and Home are all great places to take your burgeoning Yeetlet

As for my art, Ive done so many maps that they all kind of rotate in my head constantly so when i draw about jumping more often than not they're losely inspired by a combination of things that ive seen. I really wanna focus on capturing how i feel going through the places Ive been more than focusing on recapturing a jump specifically. The streaming lights, the moody glows, the colors and shapes and even the dev textures juxtaposed with overgrowth and waterfalls and the skyboxes AH♡ its so frickin good. Its all i wanna draw sometimes.

[what-if-i-just-did]

Guilt & Revenge: Collapsed Building

Whumptober, Day 24: Collapsed Building

Guilt & Revenge Masterlist

Not really any whump this time, sorry guys. Instead- Meet Jake!!! Finally!! I'm sure you've seen mentions of the guy, but here he is! Also I love writing Amber's backstory... he's such a blorbo fr. Anyways hope ya'll enjoy and lmk to be added to the taglist!

TWs: underage drinking under supervision of an adult (no alcohol abuse), breaking into an abandoned building, jokingly ageist banter (teenagers calling a 27yo old in good fun), joking threats of physical violence, collapsed wall, and mentions of implied bad childhood, teenager living on their own, death, phone endangerment, customer service, and misgendering (said by a cis girl)

“Are you sure this is safe? There isn’t.. mold or anything, right?” Noah-Elise spoke in an uneasy voice. Understandable, considering she didn’t do things like this a lot.

“Sweetie, this building has been abandoned for over a decade. I’d be surprised if there wasn’t mold.” Jake had a smirk on his face, per usual. “Amber, need a leg up?”

“As if.”, Amber said, easily following Noah-Elise over the fence. “How about you, old man? Will your knees survive?”

Jake followed Amber just as easily. “You know I’m only twenty-seven, right?”

“Still over a decade more than us.” Amber wandered off to go explore, vaguely hearing Noah-Elise’s “hey, be nice-”. They were in a fairly large, mostly open space. There was a lot of random debris lying about, and everything was covered in dust. There were cracks in some places along the bare concrete walls and floor. A bunch of rotting wooden crates were stacked on eachother on the far left end of the space. Pieces of glass and wire and small unidentifiable things littered the floor. All in all, not particularly interesting, but fun enough just by the virtue of it being forbidden. It was quite near midnight, and technically this counted as breaking in.

“Yo, Am. Beer?" 

Amber turned around to see Jake shrugging his backpack off his shoulders and unzipping it.

He signed “sure”, but out loud he said: “You brought beer? Really man?”

Jake handed him one. “I don’t see you complaining. Noah-Elise?”

“Nope. I’m not drinking until I’m twenty-one.” She signed along with her words, and side-eyed the offered can.

“More for us.”, Jake shrugged. He’d signed along with his words too, and Amber chuckled when he realized Jake’d done that subconsciously. He opened the can and took a swig. 

Amber wasn’t good enough at grammar yet to really be able to follow along when they signed and spoke at the same time too much, although they did it sometimes for practice.

The three of them spent a few hours switching between talking and signing, messing around.

Noah-Elise slowly loosened up, although she continued to mother him and Jake a bit, as always.

“You know I could get into real trouble if we get caught? This is breaking and entering, giving a minor alcohol, probably child endangerment or some shit.”

Amber grinned. “And yet you do it anyway.”

“Cuz I love you little fuckers. But if you don’t give me back my phone now, Am, I’m throwing you against that wall.”

Amber looked at the indicated wall, then looked back and raised an eyebrow. “You’re throwing a minor up against a wall? Kinky.”

Jake rolled his eyes. “More like child abuse. Now give me my phone.”

“Same thing. Catch!” Amber threw the phone gently, and was completely prepared for the string of expletives that Jake threw at him in return. 

Jake had caught the phone, of course. Amber would never actually try to break it. 

“I don’t think you’d even be able to throw me against the wall anyways. You’re probably not strong enough.”, he teased.

“Oh yeah? Frickin’ watch me- “ “Boys? Let’s not throw each other against walls? I’m sure you can find something else to throw to prove your point, there’s tons of shit here.”

And thank whomever listens for Noah-Elise, their singular brain cell.

Grumbling, Jake went off to find something to throw at the wall. 

“Thanks, Noah-Elise. I dread to think how any of us would be off without you.”, Amber said.

She took a second to respond, pretending to think it over. “Hmmm. Dead in a ditch, probably.”

“Yeah.” Amber said forlornly. He quickly took another sip of his second beer, hiding his expression. They were having a good time, with enjoyable banter. No need to get negatively nostalgic now. He’d been living on his own for a year, he had people in his life that loved him, he was finally in a good place. 

Jake came back not too much later with a heavy-looking plant pot. It had some form of dead plant in it, but Amber couldn’t quite tell- and honestly really didn’t care. “Here. Look, I can throw - “

The sound of the impact swallowed the rest of Jake’s sentence, but there wasn’t much time to dwell on it, considering that a split second later, the wall collapsed, taking a good chunk of the ceiling with it. 

For a few seconds, Amber was paralyzed with fear, trying to find the source of the danger. When his mind caught up, he called out. “Holy shit, ya’ll okay?”

He did a check check of himself- his clothes were dirty as hell and he had a few scrapes, but he seemed alright. Further examination could wait.

Noah-Elise coughed a few times, and signed “I think I’m okay”. 

Jake quickly did the sign for “same”/”me too”, then looked over at Amber. “You?”

Amber copied the sign absentmindedly. He started laughing. “Damn. Holy shit. Okay. Let’s get the fuck out of here.”

“Yeah, that sounds like a good plan..” Noah-Elise said.

They left quickly, all a bit shaken up, but overall alright.

“Fuck, now I need a shower.” Amber muttered. Jake somehow picked up on it and laughed.

“Hey, do me a favor, both of you? Promise me you’ll never tell Dave about this?”

“Deal”

Amber and Noah-Elise said it at the same time. It caused another round of infectious laughter to spread among them as they walked. Despite the fright, the night still ended well. 

Or, well. Amber groaned as he realized he had work in the morning.

“Nobody should have to deal with a customer service job after getting -”, he checked his phone, “less than four hours of sleep. It’s torture. Actually, I take that back, nobody should have to deal with a customer service job, period. Customer service is torture. Oh, sure, laugh at my pain.” Amber huffed.

“I’m only laughing cause I know the struggle, man. It’s just funny hearing it from someone who I’ve known since he was like thirteen. You’re making me feel old, dude.”

“If that makes you feel old, you should realize we were born in 2005.”, Noah-Elise piped up.

Jake stopped dead in his tracks. 

“No you’re not.”

“Yes, we were.” Amber couldn’t contain his amusement.

“That’s unfair, man. That’s low.”

Noah-Elise dramatically gasped. “You’re misgendering me?”

“Since when do you care if I call you man or bro or shit like that?”, Jake countered.

“Since never.”

“Exactly.”

“Uh huh.” Noah-Elise responded.

“What?”, Jake said, in a tone like he’d been silently accused of something.

“Nothing.”, came out among giggles.

“No, what?”

Amber and Noah-Elise were laughing. “Nothing!!”, she insisted.

Jake stared at them for a second. 

“Fucking teenagers.”, he said as he walked off.

[cherry-alive]

So, okay, I made a post a bit about this yesterday, but I've had a lot of thoughts since then and a useful conversation with my therapist. So. Complaining about dyspraxia below

I haven't been formally diagnosed with dyspraxia. It's actually pretty much the only diagnosis I've given to myself without at least medical confirmation. But I've given it to myself based on both a lot of research and comments I have received from medical practitioners (e.g. my pediatrician commenting on my weak grip, not meeting developmental milestones on time, comments from teachers, etc). And today my therapist said she's pretty sure I have it based not just on what I've reported but what she's observed in the way I physically interact with the world over the years, so that was helpful and validating. And we contacted my doctor today to hopefully get a referral to an OT, who will be able to actually assess me, which would be very cool. Because I still doubt myself all the time and go "you don't really have this" except like...I do though lol.

Part of the reason I doubt myself about it is that it hasn't had that much impact for many years. But recently, that has changed, and I've realized that it's not that I got better, it's that I went on disability and stopped trying to do a lot of things I used to do and spent like all day on my computer and got assistance with most physical tasks. I'm doing much, much better mental health wise lately, which is amazing, and as a result I'm engaging more and more with the physical world around me, whether that's going on walks or to the grocery store or cooking or dressing nicely or eating in restaurants or trying art or whatever. Which is great!

But it's all. so. fucking. physically. difficult. Not in an exhausting way, in a coordination way. Pushing carts at the grocery store? I bump into things constantly and get really overwhelmed by it and a few weeks ago dropped a glass bottle of olive oil that shattered all over the aisle in the store. Cooking? I love to cook, but it takes me at least 2 to 3 times the time to make any given recipe because I know myself and know I can't multitask so I do all the prep all at once up front, and slowly at that bc cutting vegetables is hard. Putting on makeup? Better set aside 10 minutes just to try to put on lip gloss without going outside the lines. Going to a restaraunt? Often a mortifying experience where I a) bump into other tables and/or b) have food all over my shirt by the end of the meal, which is so embarrassing but I've struggled with it my whole life. And it's just. It's all really really difficult and often I feel so ashamed when I drop something or bump into something or get messy or whatever in public and it just...it just sucks. And I get so so so frustrated and flustered and overwhelmed when I'm trying to do basic tasks at home like hanging up clothes or whatever and it's just so difficult and frustrating for me.

And I had forgotten how hard it all was because for years I just spent all my time on my computer. But I'm not doing that now. Which is great! But I trip and stumble and knock into things and get lost outside and can't do the things I want to do and I'm just constantly reminded that the physical world is very challenging for me. My probable dyspraxia has really been interfering with my life lately in pretty significant ways that have surprised me, I had kind of forgotten how frickin hard it makes a lot of things. I consider myself able bodied for the most part but I'm remembering now that like...not exactly 100% actually. And it just kind of sucks. A lot.

The good news is that as I mentioned, we contacted my GP about it and hopefully I'll get an assessment and maybe even some OT and/or PT, which could hopefully really help me. Because I'm trying very hard to recover and regain some independence, and this is proving a more significant challenge towards those goals than I had expected.

[fruitypi]

Spoiler for deltarune chapter 1 ending

"SEE what happens when you befriend Lighters!"

Sooo... Have I ever mentioned, that I adore Lancer? For some unknown to me reason, this child has been living in my head, rent free for WEEKS now. So I've spent like... A lot of time, to write a frickin essay/retrospect (my English teacher would be so proud about this thing, she would cry) about him. I have to add pictures and I'll post it (have in mind, it's my first project like this). Stay tuned for it if you're interested!

It's here!

[aeoki]

Swing Night - The Two, Divided: Chapter 2

Characters: Adonis, Kouga, Kaoru & Rei

Kouga: No, wait a minute. Why are you under the impression that I won’t be able to answer when I’m asked about my first love?

Obviously, it’s something I can do.

Rei & Kaoru: What!?

Kaoru: Y–You’re kidding, right? Kouga-kun, you always thought girls were intimidating, so what brought this on!?

Rei: Kouga, a bloody fistfight is not considered a first love, alright?

Kouga: Do you two really wanna drown in a sea of blood!?

Adonis: Oogami’s first love…

We’ve spent a long time together, but this is the first time I’ve heard of it. I’m interested. Please tell us more.

Kouga: Huh? Seriously? I didn’t think it’d garner this much attention.

Alright, fine. Well, it’s nothin’ I gotta hide, so I’ll tell you guys since Adonis really wants to hear it.

It wasn’t romantic love or anythin’ of that fickle sort, alright?

I just really admired her… If there’s someone who’s really good at something, then you’d think they’re really cool as a kid, right?

There was this really strong player at the card shop I used to frequent back then.

They had tables just for card battles there and everyone would battle each other.

The shop even posted the results of the battles on the wall too. It was a tiny shop –  just something that happened in a tiny world.

I really admired the people at the top of that battle ranking.

All the top rankers used aliases too. For example, if their deck centred on dragons, then they’d be called “Dragon Knight”.

Adonis: Hmm. The shop owner must have wanted the customers to be more competitive by doing that.

I don’t know much about card games, though.

You told me before that in order to get into the ranking, you’d have to get stronger, win more matches and buy newer cards, right?

You said that was necessary in order to come up with more tactics.

Kouga: Yeah. I’m surprised you remember.

Still, I was real poor back then, so I couldn’t buy a lot of cards. I strengthened my deck by gettin’ them from bets I won by battlin’.

I collected cards, did my best to put together a good deck and…

I was so happy and excited when I made it on the rankin’!

Rei: Hm? Were we talking about card battles? I thought we were talking about first loves.

Kouga: Just listen until the end.

Anyway, I wanted to tell the entire world that I’d made it – I wanted to get ‘em to remember me, “The Full-Moon Howling Wolf User Kou-chan”.

Kaoru: That’s a cute name and your reaction was pretty cute too.

Kouga: I–I ain’t cute. It’s supposed to sound cool!

Anyway, there was this one person who was always at the top.

I always cared about my rank, so I remembered her and started to look for her naturally.

Well, anyone would wanna meet someone like that, right? I’m already so strong, but who’s the one that’s runnin’ ahead of me?

But I never got to meet her ‘cause I never found her. 

I’d always visit the shop at night, but one day, I went to the shop a little earlier than usual and…

She was right there!

She was probably just a lil’ bit older than me, but she was unparalleled.

Once I knew what time she showed up, I started going to the shop at that time too. I’d challenge her and lose over and over.

I’d still ask for a rematch even when she drove me away. I’d lose and that would repeat.

Rei: I’m getting a sense of deja vu… You’re too persistent in your approach, Kouga. It’d do you well to increase your options, you know?

Kouga: Shut up~! It’s fine. This is just who I am!

Kaoru: Hmm? So your first love was an older girl that stood out at the card shop?

Kouga: It’s not like that – I just admired her. She was really frickin’ strong. I challenged her over and over, but I never stood a chance against her.

But after a while, she stopped comin’ to the shop.

And I started losin’ interest since she wasn’t on the rankings anymore.

After that, I’d sometimes show up when I felt like it and started battlin’ again.

I sure wiped the floor with my “Infinity Multiplying Wolf Deck”...♪

But I couldn’t fill the hole in my heart no matter how many times I won. There wasn’t any point since the champion wasn’t around.

I might’ve graduated from playin’ card games, but I’d love to get revenge against “The Underworld Slaughterer”.

Kaoru: That’s not a name you’d imagine a pretty older girl to have.

Kouga: Honestly, I don’t even remember what she looked like. I do think she was pretty, but maybe she had a lotta makeup on?

But I had a time where I lost so much to the point I’d be so frustrated and all I’d be thinkin’ about was her. She’d even appear in my dreams, but I was always super nervous when we talked.

I was just happy to have met and talked with her.

I dunno much about romantic love, but that sounds like the sorta feelin’ you’d hear about in romance movies, right?

So thinkin’ back, maybe… she was my first love.

Adonis: That’s a nice story. It’s very fitting for you, Oogami.

Kouga: Is it? I don’t really know what to think of it right now, though.

But that’s what it’s like when you’re a kid – you dunno if it was admiration, romantic love or respect.

It’s the same now, though. I can’t state my feelings clearly like they do in fiction.

Kaoru: Yeah. Hehe, but I’m glad to hear you had those sorts of experiences too, Kouga-kun.

I wouldn’t know what I’d do if you said something like, “I fell in love at first sight when I saw Sakuma-senpai at the live house – that was my first love.”

Kouga: Say what now!?

Rei: Oh my, oh my. So that’s why you’d look at me with such passionate eyes, Kouga…!

Adonis: He did that? I didn’t notice.

Kouga: I’mma frickin’ kill ya! T–That ain’t true at all!

Huh? Look, the movie’s over ‘cause we were chattin’ away.

Rei: Oh, it seems we were all too focused on your story.

It’s fine, we’ll just make sure we watch the next one until the end.

Kouga: We’re gonna watch more!? Ugh, seriously, no more…!

Rei: This is all for Adonis-kun’s sake. It’s too late to throw in the towel now…♪

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[recurring-polynya]

Writing Update/Art Update 1.16.2024

Well, I did finish that scene I was fussing about last week, but only on a technicality. The first thing that happened was that I thought of some other scene I wanted to write, and I let myself do that. It's 1800 words of zanpakutou nonsense that is currently slated for late in Chapter 8. I mentioned that I felt like another chapter was creeping its way into my outline, so I just went ahead and rearranged a little. I feel better about the outline, although I'm not sure a second extra chapter won't try to sneak its way in there.

Then what happened was that my friend had a Bake-Off themed birthday party, so I spent several days planning a bake and baking things and being consumed with anxiety and then actually going to the party and then being very, very tired. (In case anyone was curious: Earl Grey roll cake with blood orange curd fill, covered in chocolate ganache, then decorated with Earl Grey whipped cream, candied blood oranges, and raspberry-swirl macarons. It was really good. For the record, the other bakes were on the same level. My friend has some really intense friends 😂)

I went back to The Scene and looked at the outline again, and I realized that I needed to do a POV swap, but I didn't have a scene change. This is tricky business, so what I did was roll back about 1000 words and have Rukia do an exit stage left. That lets Renji take over the narration and Rukia can come back in later. I started the Renji-part but didn't get very far into it, but that was a separate bullet on the outline, so I feel justifying in checking off the Rukia-bullet.

My kids had off yesterday and then it snowed, and they got a snow day today and I am still very tired.

How is the drawing going, P? Well! The second week of prompts was all themed around "packaged food" which was significantly harder to do in a quick and easy way. Then, I mentioned that I wanted to do a Rukia-drawing. I did the sketch and I spent an hour and a half on coloring it. I decided it would look good in pastels, even though I don't know shit about how to use the pastel brushes. In any case, I realized that it was going to take another million hours of work and I simply did not like it enough to put in another million hours of work, so I gave up on it. I can always pick it up again later if I feel like it, but I have too much else to do. So, in other words, I did spend some time drawing on at least five days of last week, which is what my goal was, but I did not have a whole lot to show for it. Like I said last week, I have been posting my daily art to the art club forum, but Wedsday's prompt was "Pickle Jar" and decided to do some Between Tides fanart (by the loosest possible definition of fanart) and show it to you folks instead. This was so frickin' hard, but I really like the way my lil daikon came out!

Anyway, new week, word counter goes back to 0, hopefully this one will be a little more focused and maybe I'll actually be able to make some progress on Chapter 7.