#i so rarely post things that arent art but there are to many thoughts

[brainlessbaguette]

[TWST CHAPTER 7 SPOILERS!]

Please scroll if this isn't your cup of tea.

I'm mostly just brainstorming but there are spoilers!

Okay? They gone? Alrighty so we're asleep. I honestly figured Mal was gonna overblot super early because he's the only one that really can without us having to worry about him dying. Like everyone else was an "oh crap we gotta stop this now" moment, Malleus is more of a "eh we'll get to it in 3 to 4 business days" type of guy.

I am super interested in how the rest of this is gonna go tho. It's Idia's time to shine so I'm really hoping for those old school rpg vibes. Like are we gonna do a Majora's Mask/Kindergarten time loop where we fight malleus multiple times, he resets us, and we get new pieces to the puzzle on the next go round that brings us closer to beating him? Or are we going to go walking around waking our friends up like collectibles for one big showdown? Is Malleus even in the dream world? I can either see them doing the "he can't be here too, so this is a world where he never existed"(I will cry) or the "he's here and the games boss is keeping his eyes on you" side note tho it would be fun to see what Sebek is like without Malleus, who's his new hyperfixation?

And my now main headcanon, Malleus is really freaking strong, like REALLY strong. I personally don't think we all could beat him with force. In sleeping beauty Maleficent gets stabbed through the heart with a silver sword after Flora, Fauna, and Merryweather bless it. Now they could do the obvious boring route of having Silver fight and beat Malleus after Lilia shares what little power he has left with him or OR they could have silver do some serious emotional damage, absolutely break his heart. I think Malleus on some level genuinely believes his doing good, silver just broke down in front of him over this, now he can be with his dad forever! So tell him he's wrong, have silver chew him out about this, have Idia give him the "everybody dies and that's okay talk." They could also combine the two to severely weaken lilia, making malleus panic, have a much weaker boss battle, and then sad heart to heart. But honestly that follows the pattern of the other chapters and I kinda want to break from it a bit.

Anyway this was super rambly, I just have lots of thoughts and wanted to put them out there, I am way to invested in ch 7.

To anyone all the way down here I offer my ultimate ch 7 "headcanon"

In which Idia fights god to get the internet back.

[dunmeshistash]

in regards to skin tone variation in DM, i do think a lot of it is colorism/racism too. theres a few characters of color, but not many (just like how theres some fatter characters, but none of them are main characters (even senshi & other dwarves arent really depicted as fat)).

ryoko kui has surface representation for these people, but it lacks much substance, and the brown characters she does draw arent given brown facial features, and are almost always colored with very ashy skin. a lot of them just look like a recolored white person (especially cithis, kaka, & kiki). her random portraits of characters who dont actually appear in the series otherwise tend to be much better about this, but the actual characters that show up and play a part all seem to suffer from this issue.

im not saying kui is like, super-duper racist and we all need to stop reading DM etc etc, but i think its important to recognize and point out everyday/usually-overlooked colorism & racism when we see it, and i know im not the first or only person to point this out about her character designs. if she can draw fat people and actual brown people as part of the portraits, why cant she or wont she do the same for any of the featured characters in the series?

(i know the orcs are fat, but its not a good thing the only consistently fat people are the ones who are a fantasy race based off of violent racial stereotypes, who are also pig people, while none of the main cast of "real" humans are fat except *maybe* the dwarves, who still have small waists and flat stomachs, and the lord of the island, who is depicted as corrupt & decadent)

Well yeah.

I'm just a lore blog so I don't like to get too into real life issues or make assumptions about how the author feels about these subjects. What I talked about on the skin tone post was assumptions as to why she thought it would be important to show skin tone variations on certain races as a character design choice. (In the sense that her character design is very purposeful)

I realize some people over praise Kui's designs when most of it is pretty safe for what it is, but even if it's just a step closer to better representation it's something that's rare to see in anime. So I understand why some people get so excited about it.

It is important to realize this isn't the ideal either (Dark skinned characters with the same features as the others, mostly well build characters on the thinner side) but I personally don't like to criticize these type of stories on what it "could/should have been".

As someone who is fat and not white, I'm happy we get some diversity in dungeon meshi. I hope this opens up the possibility of better character design in the future even if what we got now wasn't perfect.

It shouldn't be the case that this piece of art filled me with so much joy I teared up cause I had never seen someone with a similar body to mine drawn with so much respect and objectivity. But unfortunately that's the world we live in and I don't think it's wrong to be happy for what we get for now while acknowledging it's not perfect and that it should be better.

I'm also super happy the anime chose to make the dark characters even darker.

[ilhoonftw]

Sry if this is weird since we arent mutuals but i thought your post re: rare polish surnames outside poland was cool!! (Bc it applies to me almost exactly 😭)

Im i think 4th gen immigrant (my paternal grandpa was born in US but idk any further back) and our last name is very uncommon, afaik the only people in the states who have it are related to me! I have distant relatives who have tried to do family trees and research but idk much about it so im not sure if the spelling or name itself got changed when my ancestors immigrated. Anyways i just wanted to mention that and i hope you have a good day!

omg this is so nice 💜

if you're 4th gen then your ancestors migrated during the 1800s at eeeaaarliest and back then mamy people had their surname changed. either by choice or by immigration officials. like helena modrzejewska (famous actress) changed hers by choice to modjeska, she migrated around 1870. i noticed changing rz to just r is rather common, i guess americans can't handle the z's 😭 it even happened in my family, they only removed that pesky z, they migrated around 1960s. migration happened in waves, like after november uprising or world wars. or when people from certain region migrated en masse. there's a very fascinating liguistic phenomenon of gwara (regional dialect) being preserved in migrant communities outside poland. gwara that's almost extinct in poland but the families of people who moved 100 years ago kept using it. like the poles who live in south america who speak in gwara pienińska because their ancestors was part of the highlander(for lack of better word) migration wave in 1800s.

part of my family went to usa around 1890s and they just had the ę ą ń letters removed. lots of foreign surnames would get polonized. when some kings would comission some foreigners to do arts and they stayed here. i know bunch of people in my family were foreigners that either had polonized surname or men took their father in law's surname (not rare especially in rural areas back in the dat). it's kinda fascinating to notice the changes, history and trying to reverse engineer. there's also the whole thing with dating the surnames that don't have the cki ski ending. or whole subgroup of "profession" surnames, including subsubgroups of surnames given to people who had the same job (like executioner or baker)

there are sites like https://nazwiska.ijp.pan.pl/ that serve as dictionary and also have extra stats like how many people use it and what's the earliest mention. some surnames date back to 1200s which is craaazy. mine isn't "that" old, only 1500s lmao. you can look up yours maybe it didn't change that much 🤔

[taiii-zores]

taina, x years old, mainblog | she/they

-> ˚₊‧꒰ა ☆₊˚ 𝙥𝙞𝙣𝙣𝙚𝙙 𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙩. ˚₊‧☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚ "All I want is just to keep improving."―Shinonome Ena

side blogs . . . @hyperbloomcarriesme genshin impact @himekomybeloved honkai star rail/impact 3rd

i love jet lag: the game, project sekai(hatsune miku: colorful stage!) and genshin impact

i also like doki doki literature club(ddlc), honkai star rail(hsr), honkai impact 3rd and etc. (it would be too long for me to write the entirety of it)

mainblog with everything related to my fandoms excluding the fandoms that my side blogs are, i'll reblog many things such as random posts, fanart and etc. i'll probably post fanart very rarely(actually im an aspiring artist /hj)

DNI = basic dni criteria

more info abt me down below:

social media . . . AO3 | reddit | twitter

please hmu in the asks or interact with me, even if we arent mutuals, i would love to chat and answer any questions!! (and i need social interaction even if it's online please i need it even if i dont like it)

i am extremely active on tumblr, so there's 99,9% im going to answer you quickly! (incase you interact with me. also the 0,01% is if i die or i suddenly dont want to use tumblr anymore)

tags: #art by me - art that i drew, can vary between various fandoms(i don't draw very often) #fics by me - fanfics that i wrote (i will not be writing very often and dont write often) #personal rambles - my personal thoughts and rambles abt things . not necessarily fandom related!

## EVERYONE'S A WINNER !

thanks for reading . . .

[ge]

my notes & thoughts about this au below⬇️ cuz who knows if ill ever get around to finishing the art i started drawing for it and i wanted to post these thoughts i had with it so let me just dump these out from of my drafts here (smile

firstly i wuld recommend yall watch winter begonia bc its like the best cdrama ive ever seen in my life and its not even close...and also some things here may not make much sense without the context of the source material/knowledge of peking opera but ill try my best to explain as much as i can..

(also very important to me that yall know WB was based off a danmei novel (though id argue that this is one of the rare cases where the censored drama adaptation is much much better than the novel source material) so if yallre interested in touching heart wrenching romance, political drama, and beautiful traditional opera costumes PLEASE WATCH IT hehe all episodes are on youtube w english subtitles)

this au takes place in 1930s shaanxi and follows chung myung, a semi-retired peking opera dan who was once wildly famous and well known for his talent and passion for the arts in his youth until a tragic "accident" struck him and his former troupe, the huashan house, leaving them to fall out of favour of the public eye and into (physical as well as financial) ruin; and tang bo, a wealthy business man from sichuan who became captivated w peking opera after watching a performance from chung myungs troupe for the first time and ends up making an acquaintanceship w chung myung and becomes the troupes main sponsor and avid supporter, helping them rebuild their huashan house as well as their former prominence and fame...

all of the ten great sects/five great families in rotmhs are rival opera groups or are somewhat involved in peking opera in some capacity in this au lol.. the tang family has vague mysterious ties to the opera business but arent performers/troupe owners themselves nor do they sponsor troupes.. that is, until tang bo meets the huashan house hehe

chung myungs current troupe consists of himself (their main/lead dan) and his disciples:

yoon jong (chou/jing)

jo gul (jing/sheng)

yu iseol (jing, she also takes the role of xiao lai in this au)

baek cheon ((wu)sheng/jing)

as well as their newest performers:

tang soso (chou/dan)

hye yeon (jing)

theyre highly understaffed tho so some of them take multiple roles..

baek sang, as well as some of the unnamed baek/chung line disciples r also here but they arent performers so their focus is probably on fixing costumes/taking care of play scripts/archiving/etc etc and the hyun elders sometimes take on the roles of laosheng if theyre needed but otherwise stay on the sidelines and take care of groupe finances or whatnot.... baek'ah is also here idk maybe shes their cute little mascot pet or smth

as for wat happened to chung myungs former troupe aka original old generation mount hua.. idk i havent thought that far but i didnt want them here so that this au could follow rotmhs canon a little closer so i imagine something suuuper dramatic happened.. maybe another rival troupe (..the magyo..? LOL) tried sabotaging them or picking a fight that got way too out of hand and lead to the accidental deaths and injuries of many of mount huas original troupe, forcing the surviving members to either leave the troupe (as all of their binding documents were destroyed) or retire.. chung myung and the elders (the hyun line) are the only original troupe members who stayed/survived.. the un disciples also show up and join the troupe sometime during the early rebuilding of their house

and following the winter begonia plot a little closer, i also entertained the idea of giving tang bo some made up oc wife just so i could have the 'husband sneaking behind his wifes back and cheating on her w the male opera performer' plot line that was featured very prominently in the drama.. idk.. wat can i say.. gay lovers cheating on their arranged marriages/comphet spouses is my guilty pleasure.. i figured in thhis au maybe tang bo had an arranged marriage w some woman who he never loved romantically but had an amicable companionable relationship with regardless.. maybe she loved him, maybe she didnt.. either way OOOOHH HES CHEATINNNNNNNGGGGG HES CHEATING

reaaalllyy need to revisit my tangchung chinese opera au cuz i dont think yall understand how badly i need to see chung myung in xiqu costume

[classic80sand90smovieloves2]

Meeting and Dating Stu Macher

(Not my gif)(Requested by anonymous)

- You met Stu when you were both in middle school. The two of you became friends purely because Stu wouldn’t let you not become his friend.

- So the two of you grew up and entered highschool together. You had a bit of a crush on him but never said anything about it, thinking that he only liked you as a friend. Oh how wrong you were....

- It’s sophomore year when you get your first real boyfriend. Stu isn’t happy about it.

- It’s obvious to see that he disapproves when you tell him that you’re going on a date. He treats you coldly throughout the entire day, not as bubbly as he usually is. While it does seem odd, you chalk it up to him feeling protective of you and not knowing how to articulate his worries.

- The next day, it’s as though nothing has happened. He nonchalantly asks you about your date but doesn’t seem all too happy to hear that it went well. You figure you’re looking into it too much.

- As time goes on, on the outside, it seems like he’s warmed up to the idea of you dating the boy, though you’re sure it’s mainly because you weren’t planning on getting rid of him anytime soon. But on the inside, it’s driving him crazy.

- Theres an obvious yet subtle rivalry between your boyfriend and him, whether one sided; at first, or not. Sometimes you wouldn’t even notice but your boyfriend sure did.

- The certain way Stu would pop up when you were hanging out, the way he called you over to him when you were trying to talk, the way he touched you; it was like he was sending a message behind his cheerful smile. Can’t you see who’s more important to her.

- He hugs you for too long, enjoys it too much. You thought your boyfriend was going crazy. You’d assure him that you were just friends, that you’d been friends for a long time and that he was just reading into it too much. That that was just Stu being, well, Stu.

- But your boyfriend wasn’t too far off. Stu had feelings for you. He had a big crush that hadn’t let up for years, one which was slowly eating away at him. He hadn’t wanted to ruin your friendship, especially when he didn’t even know if you wanted to date anyone.

- Though, regardless of whether or not you thought your boyfriend was being silly; you talked to Stu about it. He makes jokes, teasingly promising to be on his best behavior. You aren’t even aware that you’ve given him all he needs to know. He is getting to the boy and everything is working out perfectly.

- In the following days, Stu ups his antics and your boyfriend finally loses it, starting an argument which evolves into a full on fight and ends in you breaking up with him. Single once more.

- The next day at school, Stu approaches you like normal and immediately notes how tired and bothered you look. Without even thinking, you relinquish the details and he comforts you, saying that he could tell he wasn’t good for you. He does feel bad, seeing you so upset, but at the same time, he’s happy that you’re finally done with the other boy.

- It’s a week or so later that he confesses his feelings to you, wanting to give you enough time to get over the jerk. Having waited this long, he didn’t want his plan to be foiled by post breakup confusion.

- His parents are out of town so you’re staying the night, the two of you laying side by side on his bed, dressed in your comfiest clothes. You’re watching some lousy made for TV movie when he shoves your shoulder lightly, prompting you to look at him. He’s now leaning on his elbow and facing you. You shoot him a curious look and he speaks.

“We’ve known each other for a long time, right? And you know that I care about you a lot. Well, the thing is.... I care about you a lot more than you think and I want us to be even closer than we are now, ya know? I guess what I’m trying to say is that I... I love you and I want to know if you feel the same.” He rambles nervously, eyes focused on his fingers which are tracing along the blanket beneath the two of you.

- It certainly comes as a shock though you can’t say you’re completely surprised. You don’t know what to say so you let your actions speak for you. You move closer to him, hands grasping his cheeks as his own hands find your hips, pulling you closer as he tilts his head up and let’s you press your lips to his.

- He pulls you closer until you’re practically on top of him, eagerly kissing you until you both need to break apart for air. When you do, you’re both panting yet he smiles, pecking your lips and saying he’ll “take that as a yes”.

- Congratulations, you’ve earned yourself an adorable goofball who also kills people.

- He hangs all over you in public. You can never get him off of you although, would you ever really want to?

- Hand kisses. He presses his lips to your knuckles whenever he grabs your hand.

- You arent allowed to walk to class alone; he won’t let you. It is his duty to walk you and he will fulfill it.

- He rarely says your full name. Instead, he’ll either call you a pet name; usually babe or darling, or whatever nickname comes from your full name. Even if your names short, he’ll wind up making it longer just because he can.

- Long makeout sessions.

- He always gets this lovestruck look on his face whenever you show up; no matter what was going on before you arrived. His day instantly becomes like ten times better at the sight of you.

- Getting to borrow his Walkman. He makes a very strategically constructed mixtape, filled with songs that the two of you love so that both of you can listen and enjoy.

- Tasteful groping and butt smacks.

- Going to all his parties.

- He is such a baby when he gets sick. He completely overreacts, whining, moaning and acting like he’s dying even though he’s just got a mild cold.

- He tries to make your hugs last for as long as they can, especially when you’re saying goodbye.

- He’s constantly trying to make you laugh, mostly through bad jokes that will either get you to laugh through their stupidity or have you rolling your eyes.

- Teasing you is his favorite hobby. He likes doing what he’s good at and what he’s good at is being a little shit.

- Sometimes he just randomly approaches you with little gifts; mainly flowers he’s picked you or something similar. It’s usually either because you look like you need some cheering up or because he’s trying to apologize for a “stupidity leak”.

- Big boy likes being a big spoon. He’s tall so the two of you fit together perfectly.

- Gettting randomly thrown over his shoulder. Sometimes he’ll just carry you off as though you weren’t going somewhere or having a conversation with someone. Or he’ll act like nothings out of the ordinary while talking to the person you were talking to.

- You always have a seat ready for you ...on his lap.

- He leans on you all the time, whether it be him resting his chin or arm against your shoulder or him full on laying between your legs with his head against your stomach.

- Getting... the tongue. The man is constantly flashing it at you. A part of you thinks he’s trying to send a message, the other part of you just thinks he’s a dog.

- On that note, he’s probably licked the entire side of your face before, especially when you aren’t paying attention to him.

- He craves attention; it’s like a drug to him. He loves having your eyes on him, and when they aren’t? He’ll give them a reason to be.

- He’s sort of insecure so you fawning over or complimenting someone else immediately makes him uneasy. His ex girlfriend dumped him for a football player and he’s kinda scared that you’ll do the same.

- He tries to reassure you whenever you seem nervous or apprehensive, usually through jokes. Not sure about an idea of his? Well, what if he makes some action movie reference and promises to protect you as he makes karate motions with his hands?

- The boy has no subtly. He’s always blunt and upfront with what he’s trying to say so you’re never confused by any “insinuations” that he makes.

- Getting random, unexpected visits from him, usually when you’re at work or home alone.

- This man is a cheerleader when it comes to you. He’s always hyping you up and complimenting everything you do.

- He’s constantly bragging about you; he’s so proud.

- Movie dates. He’s not as completely obsessed with horror as Billy is but he still enjoys sitting with his girl, watching a film and trying to “subtly” feel you up.

- Getting close to Billy by default. The two of them are constantly together so you wind up being costantly around him as well.

- Hanging out at the fountain with him and his friends.

- His parents are out of town a lot so you have the whole house to yourselves most of the time.

- He’s got a farmhouse on the outskirts of town with the perfect view of the sunset/sunrise. You don’t know how many times you and him have laid out on the grass, cozied up next to each other and watching the sky change colors.

- Stealing his sweaters when it gets cold. You should see his face when he sees you wearing them, it’s the perfect example of a lovestruck expression.

- Jaw and neck kisses. He doesn’t care if he’s giving or receiving; he loves them either way.

- Inside jokes.

- Having to stifle a laugh when he mocks or makes fun of someone. It’s so stupid that you can’t help but chuckle.

- He may not seem like a very jealous person but whew boy. For someone who is constantly bragging about how great you are, he hates other people actually seeing it and admitting that he’s right.

- He’s a protective boy, he hates the thought of you being hurt, upset, or take advantage of. And he’s like so buff, he’s got you covered.

- Defending him whenever someone won’t let up on him. He isn’t very articulate so if someone needs to be shut down verbally, you do it yourself.

- Local sensitive baby caves under peer pressure. It’s incredibly easy to make him do what you ask; thankfully, you aren’t trying to make him do something that will get him in trouble.

- He doesn’t quite grasp the art of being tactful so you’ll oftentimes have to interrupt or stop him from saying something.

- Since he always seems to say the wrong thing or do something stupid, the two of you; most likely, have more than a few petty arguments. They usually aren’t anything worse than a little bickering.

- He always does something adorable that makes you forgive him whether it be using puppy dog eyes on you or telling bad jokes until you can’t help but warm back up to him.

- Not a day goes by where he doesn’t say he loves you. He needs you to know!!

- He doesn’t really talk about the future but he’s planning on marrying you as soon as he can and that’s a fact. The man is in love.

[normal-thoughts-official]

Do you have any malec blog recs?

hmmm not any blogs that are Exclusively Malec i dont think but i do have a few recs (ngl off the top of my head i can't think of many ppl who arent just My Friends but welp to be fair i did befriend most of them because i loved them, so)

@luxxmagnus is one of my absolute favorite ppl uwu it's a sh-only blog with heavy emphasis on Magnus (duh) but they post a lot of good shit and theres also a fair share of maia and raphael which is always 👌

@kinkymagnus is a porn blog but theyre the best porn blog and again malec exclusive. u probably know them if u follow me but welp

@thesorrowoflizards is multifandom but has some great malec and Magnus takes

@gorgeousmagnus @jademagnus arent super active but they're a malec/magnus gif reblog stash and like. thank u for doing the lord's work i appreciate it

@manzini is also multifandom but shes great and has some good takes, particularly on twi!malec. theyre also the most alec-leaning out of all these ppl im mentioning here so if u also like him u should check her out hfbfjfn tbh we need more anti fanon Alec Alec stans

same goes for @alecgideonlightwood and @fortunatelycrazyyouth idk if alecgideon is multifandom or not but anyway they are great i like their content

@biconicfinn is multifandom but they write a lot of good malec shit (theskythatwontfall on ao3 ur welcome) as well as Magnus stuff and Alec stuff

@pastaingallday is new here but she's super great and fun and has great takes give her some love

@maiaisbia is FIRE and i love them to pieces. they have great malec and sh in general content, and if found family is ur thing ur definitely gonna love their content. they're aurora_chiroptera on ao3 and i recommend everything theyve ever written, plus theyre into the polycule™ as well so that's great 👌👌👌👌 theyre one of the best friendship writers out there and thats rare

@claiabelle hasnt been super active recently due to personal problems but another very good blog with good takes

@magnuscaresalot is a wonderful artist and fanfic writer! again they have a lot of sh stuff not just malec but i definitely recommend them

@hongbeanmochi is multifandom but they are, and i cannot stress this enough, an AMAZING artist, definitely one of my favorites for this fandom. their art style is super cute and theyre insanely talented and everything they do fills me with joy. also they take commissions so go appreciate them and shower them in money! its what they deserve

okay those are the ones i thought off the top of my head but there are more probably. if i forgot u I'm sorry. but go give these beautiful ppl some love

[kissygrayson]

LANDSLIDE: Chapter 2 - Happy Birthday Liam

… in which Y/N and Harry fall in love at university.

series masterlist

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“Are you ready?” Amy asked entering Y/N’s bedroom. Y/N was sat at her desk in front of the mirror. Her makeup was scattered across the desk and a thousand dresses and skirts lay on her floor. 

“The party started already” Amy said noticing her best friend wasn't dressed yet, still sat in her joggers and hoodie. Y/N sighed. 

“I have nothing to wear” 

“You literally have a million dresses right here!” Amy said bending down to grab the few dresses. 

“They're ugly” Y/N muttered, turning in her seat to face her best friend. 

Amy left the room leaving Y/N confused, then returning with a white crop top and and black denim skirt. 

“Wear this, please!” she pretty much begged. Y/N took the outfit then going to try it on in her bathroom. 

“Well?” Amy questioned��“Do you like it or are we going to be another 90 years?” she laughed. 

She left the bathroom, a small smile on her face. She shuffled through the boots and shoes beside her bed then chucking on her black doc Martens. 

“Is that you done?”Amy asked with a huff. She felt like she’d been waiting forever. 

“Okay I'm done, can you stop complaining for a second?” Y/N laughed. 

The girls quickly put the essentials into their bags and left their flat. They passed their neighbour Mary on the way out, she usually sat on a seat outside her flat - for no reason really, other than wanting to see the drama that usually happened across the hall between the couple that lived in the opposite flat, Josh and Beth. 

“Hi girls, you both look nice!!” she smiled sweetly, warming her hands with the cup of tea in her hand. 

“Thank you Mary, anything exciting happen tonight?” Y/N asked with a laugh, gesturing to Josh and Beths side of the hall. 

Mary laughed “No not yet, soon though im sure. You guys going anywhere exciting?” 

Amy gave Y/N a look, telling her to hurry up. They where already an hour late. 

“Going to a birthday party, we should get going though. We spent too long getting dressed” Amy said smiling. Mary nodded watching as the girls got into the elevator and left the building.

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The girls finally found the building after searching for so long. They had walked up and down the same street for 20 minutes then realising the apartment was right in front of them. They entered the building hearing loud music, knowing exactly where the party was taking place. They walked up the stairs then coming to face with Liams apartment. A few people stood outside, some smoking, some just chatting and of course a few making out. 

“Shall we just go inside?” Y/N asked Amy. Amy nodded. 

The pair stepped inside a few hundred people cramped into Liams flat, most of them dancing to post Malone who was currently playing from the speakers. They stood awkwardly to the side, Y/N’s eyes searching the crowd to see if she could spot Harry or anyone else she knew. 

“Y/N!” Harrys voice called out as she finished her short search. A smile spread across her face, Harry making his way towards the two girls.

“You guys just got here?” he asked.

“Yeah, took us forever to find the place” Y/N laughed. “This is Amy” she said introducing the blonde to Harry. 

“Harry” he said with a smile in which Amy returned. 

“You girls want a drink?” he questioned. 

“Please” Amy groaned. Both girls then following the older boy to the kitchen where a thousand bottles of alcohol and snacks sat along with a few people. Harry handed both girls a bottle of beer then getting one for himself as they made small talk. 

“So, do you both take the same classes or?” Harry asked followed by a drink of beer. 

“No, Amy’s taking art” Y/N smiled. 

“Wait” Harry paused then shouting “Yo Zayn!” 

A boy around the same age as Harry entered the kitchen, a warm smile on his face and a red cup in his hand. Amy spun on her heel to look in the direction of him noticing he was in her classes. 

“Zayn, this is Amy, she's also taking art” Harry introduced the pair, Y/N shook her head giggling when she realised what Harry was up too. Harry gave her a silly smile telling her to be quiet. 

“Amy, I recognise you!!” Zayn said pulling the blonde into a hug. 

“Please tell me you haven't did the work yet for Monday” she said with wide eyes. The class was to draw something that inspired them, Amy was yet to find that thing, leaving her homework to last minute - as usual. 

“You haven't?” he questioned. Amy shook her head. 

“Follow me Amy” Zayn laughed. Amy looked back at Y/N shrugging her shoulders, Y/N whispering for her to go. 

“Look at you playing cupid” Y/N laughed once the pair left the kitchen. 

Harry smirked “Its what I do best” 

Before Y/N could say another word Harrys phone ringing interrupted the pair. 

“Ill be right back, stay here” he said while running off to answer it. 

Y/N stood awkwardly. She didn't really know many people at the University, never mind this party, so standing alone was her only option. She gave a small smile to the girl stood beside her who just drew her a dirty look back. Typical she mumbled to herself. 

“Have you seen Liam?” A female voice said interrupting her thoughts. 

Y/N looked to her left noticing a brunette that sat behind her in her Friday class. 

“Y/N?” she questioned also noticing the familiar face. 

“Sammie right?” she asked back then offering her a drink.

“Im okay, thank you though. Just looking for Liam, I swear that boy is always disappearing” She laughed.

Y/N smiled “I wouldn't know, you're the only person I know here other than Harry”

“Harry Styles?” Sammie asked taken a back. 

“Thats the one” Y/N smiled, slightly confused. 

“Be careful Bella” Sammie said. Careful? The boy seemed harmless. 

“What?” She asked eyebrows furrowed. 

“His ex girlfriend is a literal pyscho!” She laughed. “No but seriously, they broke up a few months ago and she's bat shit crazy. So please be careful” Sammie finished giving the girl a comforting smile. 

“We aren’t dating, just friends” Y/N awkwardly said. She wasn't sure what to feel anymore. “Thanks for looking out for me though. Do you know where the bathroom is?” she questioned. 

Sammie pointed down the hallway telling her it was the door to the left, then running of to find Liam. 

Y/N made her way along the hallway, passing a few people on her way to which she gave them a small smile. She turned left seeing two doors, opening the first one her eyebrows furrowed. This certainly wasn't the bathroom, she thought to herself. 

The walls where black, a few posters and photo frames scattered the walls. A laptop sat on the desk near the window, a TV and playstation beside it. She took notice of the white picture frame to her right sat on who she assumed was Liams chest of drawers. The picture was of 5 guys, one of them being Harry and another Zayn, the other she soon recognised was Niall and the two brunettes she didn't at all, surely one was Liam though. 

“Y/N?” She heard Harrys voice call from beside her. Harry exited the bathroom that joined to whoever bedroom she was standing in, a confused expression on his face. 

“You okay?” He asked. 

“Yeah sorry, I was looking for the bathroom. I should go” She hesitantly said. Harry took a step closer to her, shutting the bedroom door. 

“Do you really wanna go back out there?” He laughed taking a seat on the double bed. She shook her head with a laugh. 

“I kinda hate parties too” Harry said with a smirk. Y/N took a seat beside him. 

“Arent you supposed to be the bad boy, Styles?” She said returning the smirk. Harry chuckled at the girl, I guess she had heard the rumours. 

“I’m really not as bad as you think” he said. 

Y/N shook her head still smiling “Sure Harry. So why’d you hate parties?” She asked. 

“Sophie is always there, I try my best to avoid her” he laughed nervously, knowing Y/N had probably been warned about her by now. 

“Sophie? Your ex?” Y/N asked confused also worried. Harry seemed nervous now, so maybe Sammie was right in saying she was crazy. 

“Yeah, she's insane” Harry laughed. “But just ignore her” He quickly said making sure the younger girl wouldn't be scared and decide not to speak to him anymore. 

“You haven't dated since her?” Y/N asked curiously.

Harry shook his head laughing “Dated? More like I haven't had a proper conversation with a girl without her evil eyes staring at me”

Y/N eyes widened in shock. Maybe this was more serious than she thought. She’d never been in a proper relationship before, sure there where little things here and there, but shed never been commited to anyone, so she wasn't quite sure how Harry was feeling right now. All she knew was that this boy seemed nervous, scared even. 

“Cmon she can’t be that bad” Y/N giggled trying to lighten up the mood. Harry raised his eyebrows shaking his head. 

“Y/N you really have no idea” he laughed. 

.

.

.

The pair sat in Liams room - she soon learned it was his room, for the next hour or so, getting to know more about each other. Y/N had learned that Harry had met most of the boys in high school, some of them shared classes with him and the others he played football with. He also hated the university library, calling it fate that she happened to be there the one day he was. She knew from that day in the library that he was soon to take over his fathers company, what she didn't realise was how big a deal that was. His father owned what seemed like a thousand hotels around the world much like her cousin Ollie, most of them in the US, some in Dubai, the UK and the list went on. They where some of the fanciest hotels in the world, only the best of the best could afford to stay the night there. Y/N was shocked. 

Harry soon learned that Y/N had moved from Italy to Oxford to do nursing school. Her mother passed when she was 2 leaving her father to raise her on her own in Brighton, soon she met her step mother when they then moved to Italy and was blessed with two half siblings, Issac and Oscar. They also realised they both adored Fleetwood Mac, Harry claiming he was good at singing then promising he’d sing for her one day - he rarely sang in front of anyone, she must have been special. 

Their meeting was cut short with Y/N’s phone ringing, Amy telling her to meet her outside. Realising that it was now 2am, she waved her goodbyes to Harry, him making sure she knew he’d see her again soon. 

“So what happened with Zayn?” Y/N smirked, hooking her arm in her best friends as they both walked back towards their flat. 

“I’ll tell you everything when we get home. Now you tell me what happened with Harry?” 

.

taglist: @vinylhazza @cryinabtharvey

[kittybaffo]

Alright so a friend of mine had some important questions and I thought a formal list would help a lot of people.

Highschool tips:

What classes should I take?

Honnors and AP (Advanced Placement: score a 3/5 or higher on the Final exam and you get college credit). They arent that much harder than the regular classes but NEVER EVER I repeat NEVER sacrifice your physical or emotional health for a class. Start on Honnors and AP classes but if it becomes too much drop down to a regular coarse at the transition between semesters. A B in a Honnors class when you transfer your grade will get boosted to an A in most school systems (in America at least).

Experiment with arts. Most art classes are a participation grade as long as you are actually trying. Even if you aren't great at it at least it will be a nice Destresser/break in your schooldays.

How should I manage my required Volunteer Hours?

Try and get them all done Freshmen and Sophmore year, it's easier than you think. School functions? Volunteer to decorate or run concessions. Local Animal Shelter? Volunteer to walk the dogs!

Do way more than the required amount! It looks good when colleges or employers look at your school history

Time management?

Homework first, social life and games later.

Do the stuff with the closest due date first and work on your homework when you have time at school.

DON'T BE SCARED TO AST FOR HELP

Personal tips I learned through personal experience and the experiences of those around me:

Romance is not important, especially not Freshmen year. It's just a bunch of extra stress you dont need and the relationships rarely work out.

Don't go to upper classmen parties, do drugs, or drink. It's just a bad idea. I've seen too many kids ruin their lives freshmen year. Just make smart choices.

Believe it or not your parents usually understand. Not all parents, but most. Talk to them, they are just as scared as you are and probably just as stressed. Also parents, don't discredit any of your childs accomplishments or interests. Most likely if they are happy listening to a band or drawing you should pay attention, because sometimes bands and artists can save more kids than a therapist ever can. If it means something to your child, listen to them when they talk to you about why even if you don't understand it at first.

Pay attention in class, and if you get sick a lot fine 1-3 reliable people in each of your classes that pays attention that would be willing to send you class notes and explain a few things when you are absent.

TAKE NOTES. For the love of all things TAKE NOTES and STUDY. It's boring but there are plenty of youtube videos on how to make it easier, or just ask me, my asks are always open!!!

Don't overstressed yourself, put your needs first and get your work done, then worry about your social life. Form study groups. Not the boring kind. Get a few friends with similar classes as you over at your house sometime (once a month or so) and get homework done and study. Order pizza after it's all done and watch a couple movies or play games.

Don't expect to walk out of highschool with the same friends you had going in, people grow and change. The real friends are the ones that no matter how far apart you grow, you always gravitate back together.

Toxic people arent worth it, if they make you feel like you arent worth it or that something is always your fault drop them out of your life. It sounds mean but trust me you are much better off mental health wise once you do

Emotions are ok as long as you dont get in fights.

Join as many clubs as you want as long as it wont hurt your grades or health. Try a little bit of everything.

Don't give up, these 4 years will fly by so fast if you are doing what you are supposed to.

Anyway that's the end of today's post. For any further questions just slide over to the comments or asks and I'll get back to you ASAP. Make sure to reblog, I'm sure this could help someone out there at least a little bit.

[the-sanders-sides]

inidan american (desi) logan

a sequel to this post because people asked for more and i decided that they shall receive (and also i love writing these)

fair warning, logans a bitter kid, and this isnt as positive and happy as romans post. ive experienced two different ways of being desi, one where i lived in fully asian and indian community and didnt even think id ever feel alone, and another where i moved to a place where i havent met another desi in like 7 years of living here in a 3 hour driving radius. in romans post i played into my first experience and how at home i felt. in the second experience, the one im in right now, i am much more bitter about who i am and not really knowing anyone who gets it anymore. so i play into that A LOT in this. so keep that in mind. (and he will get happier in a future part. m planning on making this into a series)

ok so first off. his name is logan sanders. people (mostly other indians) dont believe him when he tells them. he tells them they dont know indian history. they say they do. he tells them that the british fucked around (quite literally) in india for four centuries so of course english names would stick with that precise wording

sometimes when he’s annoyed enough and doesnt want to explain this for the millionth he defends himself with this russel peters skit (watch it, it’s hilarious) because it describes his family. to a T. 

he grew up in a community with not very many asians, and knew no indians outside his family so he felt a sort of disconnect to his culture

while his grandparents and parents would teach him about indian culture, he felt so distant from it since he knew no one outside his family who was indian, and since he didnt have any siblings or any nearby cousins to hang around with

he had visited india once but he was too young to remember it properly or too remember his cousins

the closest mandir was an hour away so that also limited the amount of indian kids/people he knew

he barely knew hindi because everyone in his family spoke english, especially in public

he felt guilty over the disconnect he felt and would always try to bridge it but would never accomplish this because it he kept losing passion since he rarely saw other people like him in the real world and in the media and he didnt see the point of trying

this all changed in eight grade when he moved next door to the Kumar family in a north indian street of some south asian blocks in an asian community

when his family first moved, the Kumar family invited the Sanders over to welcome them

it turns out the Kumar’s had a son who was the same age as logan

“hi logan! im rohan kumar! but i like going by roman instead of rohan!” 

this introduction pissed logan off 

he was seething because why would this kid who got to have an indian first AND last name change his name to an english one! why didnt he see the value of his name!

he knew right away that such a difference meant they could never be friends 

“im logan sanders, but thats all youll get to know about me because i see no use associating myself with someone as... well, ignorant, as you”

roman decides to whip out one of the swears his cousins taught him and whisper shouts “who are you calling ignorant, bhenchod?” 

 it became clear to him that this was new turf, and people on this new turf must be speaking hindi. and that he was the ignorant one if he couldnt talk in hindi. he made a vow to learn it as fast as he could to make sure this roman kid wasnt better than him

but, logan grits his teeth and says “you, and i know it must be true because you were too dumb to understand me the first time”

this evidently struck a sore spot in roman because he didnt fight back but just stalked away. logan smiled slightly, happy to have won that argument

logan asks his grandpa to teach him hindi and his grandpa gets super excited

they start lessons immediately and despite barely hearing it growing up, it’s as if his brain was made for this because he picks the language up amazingly fast and in a months time, while not able to speak back yet, he can understand most casual conversation

his first diwali in basically little india is the most magical thing ever

diwali at his old home was very quiet because there wasnt anyone around to celebrate with

everyone is so happy in this new home however. everyone is dressed up and all the houses are lit up and there are diyas everywhere and he doesnt want to admit it but the kumar’s have the best rangoli on the street and it’s because of roman and he knows roman did it because sometimes he’d stare out of his bedroom window while doing homework and have a perfect view of roman delicately working on it for two weeks

(the kumar’s front porch had been covered with tarp waiting for diwali to make sure romans precious rangoli wasnt stepped on or ruined. when it’s finally let up, everywhere where there could be art, there is. it’s insane how good at colors roman is, logan thinks)

diwali morning: 

he fights his parents because he doesnt want to miss school for diwali because americans dont have a day off for it. his parents set the clocks in the house ahead to make him think he overslept so he would skip school. (logan didnt know that his parents had submitted an excused absence form for religious reasons and that the school was very understanding. he thought it would be like his old school where he wouldnteven bother trying since he wasnt christain and the school was lkinda discriminatory)

they spend the morning in mandir and it’s nice. for once he doesnt feel different from his peers because he goes to mandir and not church or synagogue. he feels at home.

diwali afternoon:

the afternoon is spent with frantic cleaning and cooking and digging around for the diya’s that were still in boxes, packed away from when they moved

logan offered to find them all to continue with a diya science experiment he started two years prior. his theory was that the diya’s were multiplying and there were more each year despite no one buying anymore

this held true, because even though he could only find half of their diya collection, it was somehow more than the entire diya collection of two years prior. 

diwali evening:

theres a big potluck and everyone in the neighborhood is out talking to each other, looking at the decorations at everyones houses, eating samosas, and playing with sparklers. 

logan feels content

he makes a new resolve to learn more about hinduism. if this is what ti was supposed to be, then he never wanted to be away from hinduism. 

he looked at the metaphors and symbolism in everything and finally understood what his dad meant he told logan that hinduism is just science written in poetry and that string theory is written in the ancient texts

middle school in this new town is so much better than middle school in his old home. why?

a. doesnt get bullied for being a nerd

b. doesnt get called gay slurs 

c. the classes are harder 

d. much less racism

e. all of the above

soon enough, logans asking his grandpa to teach him how to cook Indian food

Logan spends the day burning dosas and making lopsided rotis

(eventually he gets the hang of it, and a he'll be cooking food for an infuriating Indian boy ;) ;) psst it's roman)

Speaking of boys

Coming out isn't an option for logan

He knows that his parents arent really religious enough to really look into hinduism and see that no, gays are not bad

But they are traditional and conservative enough to be homophobic

not homophobic as in spewing hate with the westboro baptist church at a pride parade

But homophobic as in "the gays are fine as long as they don't do it in front of me" kinda thing

So Logan stays quiet

the closet kinda sucks but i mean what can he do

it’s safer inside, and he as illogical as wishing is, he wishes that people would use their brains and realize there’s nothing wrong with gay

anyway

in school logan makes his first desi friend, who was dubbed as anxiety years ago and cant seem to get rid of the nickname and now has a whole complex about his name so logan doesnt know his name

logan and anxiety meet in the school library: logan studying and anxiety hiding

people dont like anxiety

especially non-indian kids

surprise surprise it’s an old buddy called racism, but anxiety’s story is for another time

(but even though no one really likes anxiety, whenever racist shit goes down, it has to go through roman)

so logan and anxiety become fast friends

and they make fun of roman (a+ bonding)

logan claims that roman is a hypocrite for changing his name to an english one while being so immersed in indian culture

anxiety doesnt dispute this, but says he has a past with roman

a past that involved getting stuck with the name anxiety

again, another story for another time

one day, when logan and anxiety are eating lunch they see roman destroy some homophobes who throw around the word f*g and keep calling caitlyn jenner, bruce jenner

logans chest surges

he’s all like “what?? emotions?? pride at roman?? is he better than me for being so open and standing up for what he believes in??”

gay panic basically

but logan masked it well and pushed it away

the next day roman comes to school with a pride patch on his jean jacket

logan feels like he cant breathe

logan is supremely jealous of roman.

he can be gay in peace

he can pretend not to be indian in a way that benefits him

and he’s not affected by stereotypes in the same way?? like what does this kid not have

and by stereotypes i mean

roman is the complete opposite of all indian and desi stereotypes: loud, flamboyant, theatrical

logan’s personality is exactly how the stereotypes are. he’s nerdy and likes science and math and it seems like he cant escape the stereotypes. they follow him. and he feels guilty that he likes science and math and is nerdy. 

as illogical as it is, he wishes he was different from how he is

but logan later learns that there are more than just his perspective on being desi and that every desi kid growing up faces challenges about it that are different than his, causing them to experience being desi differently

and logan will accept that, in another story at another time

for now, he’s just bitter. and as illogical as it is, he wishes the world was better

and now, i shall tag some people who asked to be tagged and some other desi’s who loved this because i feel like you guys might appreciate this too. also i love u. desi famders squad up.

@sssixeyedrunt @ultimate-queen-of-fandoms2 @caterpiller-tea @xxxbladeangelxxx @snufflesthegrim227 @cloudchaser7 @thelowlysatsuma 

[halalhyungwon]

1-100 odds

Jaz you’re a real one

1: when you have cereal, do you have more milk than cereal or more cereal than milk?

It depends on the cereal, tbh. Some cereals I prefer a lot of milk and others I put less

3: what random objects do you use to bookmark your books?

I’ve used my phone, random sheets of paper, pens/pencils, white out tape…

5: are you self-conscious of your smile?

A lil bit

7: do you name your plants?

I don’t have any plants :( If i did, I probably would

9: do you like singing/humming to yourself?

Yes, I do it constantly

11: what’s an inner joke you have with your friends?

Inner joke? Like, inside joke?… I have a lot. And yet, I can’t think of one to share lmao

13: what’s something that made you smile today?

I was on the phone with my bestie for like 5hrs and I hadn’t called them in a while so that made me happy (: 

15: go google a weird space fact and tell us what it is!

“A total of 32 monkeys have flown in space.”

17: what color do you really want to dye your hair?

This shade of purple that Minseok had because it is sooo pretty. I’ve wanted to dye my hair that color for the longest time

19: do you keep a journal? what do you write/draw/ in it?

I do have a journal and I used to write in it regularly but kinda stopped once I got into sophomore year of college. It was kinda my brain dump and also where I just spilled all my emotions that I never talked to anyone about

21: talk about your favorite bag, the one that’s been to hell and back with you and that you love to pieces.

Favorite?? Hmmm there’s the bag my cousin bought me for my high school prom. It’s cute and small and white and going over your shoulder. I don’t use it much but I’m still happy to have it.

23: what’s your favorite thing to do on lazy days where you have 0 obligations?

watch exo and seventeen make fools of themselves lmao

25: what’s the weirdest place you’ve ever broken into?

I don’t recall breaking into anywhere…but I remember one summer my brother and I went for a walk to a school in my cousin’s neighborhood and an alarm went off and scared tf out of us

27: what’s your favorite bubblegum flavor?

wintermint (?) i think it’s called

29: what’s something really cute that one of your friends does and is totally endearing? 

One of my friends has this pack of cards that says “I LOVE YOU BECAUSE” and then it has a bunch of bullet points for different reasons you could love someone. She gave me one sophomore year and another one just recently and honestly it’s so sweet

31: what is your opinion of socks? do you like wearing weird socks? do you sleep with socks? do you confine yourself to white sock hell? really, just talk about socks.

Socks and I…we acknowledge each other’s existence and hang out when we need to. I only where socks with my sneakers and boots, and when it’s really cold. I cannot where socks all day. Like it’s impossible. When I wear socks I just feel hyper aware of the fact that there is cloth on my feet and it makes me uncomfortable. I can’t go to sleep with socks on, unless I’m extremely tired and just fell asleep. Even then, I’ll wake up with my socks kicked off in the morning.

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends.

Most recently! My friend and I were trying to observe the meteor shower last weekend. And like the thing is for the first hour or so we didn’t see any and kept trying to find the best place to observe them. Then, I finally saw one, but it was right when my friend was looking down so she didn’t get to see it! And then, another hour or so passes and it just seems like we’re never gonna see another one, so we decide to head back to our dorms. BUt, on the way back we find a spot that would be just perfect to see them, so we just loitered there for almost another hour, jammin to music and just waiting to see some shooting stars! And then the next one comes but it happens right as I’m looking at my friend to talk to her, but she’s looking up so she gets to see it. After that some time passes and it’s already 3:30 a.m. and I’m tired and lowkey gotta pee, so we start making our way back to the dorms again. And then we find another spot that would be good viewing, so we chill there for a while because, though we’ve both seen a shooting star, we haven’t see one together. So we’re standing there, chillin, being goofs and listening to trap remixes of the Wii theme, when we both look up and go “OH!!!” and freak out bc we finally saw another shooting star and it was just great. 

(I realized I answered this even tho it’s not odd but i’m just gonna keep it bc i love it too much)

33: what’s your fave pastry?

do cinnamon rolls count as pastries?…i could really go for one…

35: do you like stationary and pretty pens and so on? do you use them often?

Yes I do!! But I don’t have many :(( Part of me wants to buy a big set but like I already have a bunch of pens and notebooks (but they arent all aesthetic and pretty and stuff) and I also think i’d stop using them after a week or so

37: do you like keeping your room messy or clean?

I like having a neat room (I cleaned my room today I’m so happy, it looks so spacious) 

39: what color do you wear the most?

Black, probably

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving?

I don’t read often but I think the last book I really enjoyed … Howl’s Moving Castle

43: who was the last person you gazed at the stars with?

@batmanlemonade hey ;) [see #32]

45: do you trust your instincts a lot?

No? maybe? idk

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe?

pickles…

49: do you like buying CDs and records? what was the last one you bought?

I wishhh I could just buy all the cd’s i’ve ever wanted. If I had more money I probably would have a nice collection. The last CD i’ve bought was back in high school and I think it was OneRepublic’s Native album

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them?

My little brother… whenever i hear transformer, touch it, monster or kkb I think about him bc those are his favorite exo songs loll

53: have you ever watched the rocky horror picture show? heathers? beetlejuice? pulp fiction? what do you think of them?

I don’t think I’ve watched any of these but beetlejuice, and I love beetlejuice

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point?

I scrolled through my kyungsoo tag for a good hour or so to prove to my friend how much i love him sfdjkl; that’s not very dramatic but it’s the first thing I thought of. She really didn’t question that I loved him, I just love any excuse to look through my tags

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics?

bohemian rhapsody is a classic sfkl; um it always reminds me of my childhood bc my brothers and i used to watch these animated videos and one of them was of bohemian rhapsody but with megaman characters lmao

59: what’s your favorite myth?

UHmmm I really don’t know lol sorry

61: what’s the stupidest gift you’ve ever given? the stupidest one you’ve ever received?

In sophomore year I wanted to buy my roommate her favorite flavor of ice cream but I didn’t have money so I drew ice cream on a post-it note for her I can’t think of a stupid gift I’ve received…

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be?

lol no, i just let ‘em be. they’re chillin

65: is there anyone you haven’t seen in a long time who you’d love to hang out with?

my cousin who’s in med school, I haven’t seen her in too long :c

67: how do gloomy days where the sky is dark and the world is misty make you feel?

I kinda like those days. If I’m in a good mood, gray skies, cool breezes and light rain make me feel better. Otherwise, it’s just meh.

69: what are your favorite board games?

There’s this Korean board game that I can’t remember the name of for the life of me, and tbh since I haven’t played it in a while I don’t remember the exact rules, but it’s kinda of like Sorry! I’ve only played it twice but it was really fun both times

71: what’s your favorite kind of tea?

Chai

73: what are some of your worst habits?

putting myself down and procrastinating

75: tell us about your pets!

I don’t have any :-( I’ve been really wanting a cat lately

77: pink or yellow lemonade?

Pink~

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you?

Hmmm when I was in high school I reeeally loved Michael Buble (I still do, have you heard that man’s voice?) so for Valentine’s day, my friend got me this box and taped his face on the top lmaoo with a reference to one of his song lyrics. The box was filled with flowers and chocolate and gum (but at the time I had braces so i couldn’t even chew the gum lolll)

81: describe one of your friend’s eyes using the most abstract imagery you can think of.

I really wish I could but I’m not creative and this headache I have isn’t helping safhjlk sorry

83: what’s some of your favorite album art?

I really like the cover for 1R’s Native album, and also p!atd’s too weird to live too rare to die

85: do you read comics? what are your faves?

Not really, but I’d like to

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives?

Howl’s Moving Castle, Room No 7 starring Do Kyungsoo, coming out November 15 and..I can’t really think of another one

89: are you close to your parents?

Kinda sorta

91: where do you plan on traveling this year?

i have no plans to travel :( 

93: what’s the hairstyle you wear the most?

My hair in it’s natural state lol covered by my hijab

95: what are your plans for this weekend?

Chillin! I was supposed to lock myself up in my room and finally watch the exo and seventeen concerts I have downloaded but i haven’t gotten around to watching them yet. But I have been chillin in my room so it’s been alright

97: myer briggs type, zodiac sign, and hogwarts house?

infp, scorpio, and i have no idea

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them.

UHhhmmm Call Me Baby and Heaven by EXO; Healing and Don’t Listen in Secret by Seventeen; Hug Me by Jung Joon Il

[thedeadflag]

1 When thinking of the word daddy I've always thought of a women? if i ever thought of a man as a daddy ive never sexualized it or ?? but i can now see the daddy kink and its effect. Ive read the g!p fic analysis and i didnt know a lot about the stuff ive read. The clexa fandom is the first fandom ive been in and its where ive first seen anything about g!p or about a/b/o? or even the word dubcon. Dont know if im naive or just didnt think about looking more into it and what it all really means.

(2/5) and not going to lie here i have read a few g!p and the a/b/o stories and ive read another post where you also have a lot of questions how in these fics writers "g!p fics get our bodies wrong" (not sure what how to title the post) and reading through it theyre many questions that are sometimes to never mentioned in them and it just sounds more or a interesting read if stories did mentioned those things and were written well and right about trans/intersex women?

(3/5) i dont know where i went with all this but it was a well interesting read that i dont not understand all of it just yet but will continue to reread and look more into it :)

(4/5) lastly i didnt mean to disrecpect you if i did it was unintentionally. sorry. i saw a post where somewhere around the lines you said it hurts to write clexa because of how horribly written lexa is as a trans/intersex women or in g!p fics and all and fetished and pain. i was deeply hurt by it all when she died and knowing this side in fics it adds to the hurt and how some people dont talk about it more or writers not listening due to wanting popularity

(5/5) wanted to add that even in ouat there was the same issues? in fics so it looks like and now in clexa fics involving all this. even though its been more then an year since lexas death lots of people were hurt in many different ways so many things happened after some for the better and some things thats are still arent talked about and not only effects this fandom but others. sorry just have many thoughts on it that slowly ill become more aware of. dont need to answer this just needed to say more

Like, I know the whole “She calls me daddy too” meme floats around wlw fandom and all, but that sort of thing literally did start in hetero fandom. I’ll definitely take your word that that’s what you think when you see/read/hear it, but 99+% of the time, that’s not going to be the case, and it’s not going to chance that ‘daddy’ is an explicitly primarily male-coded word. it will always be associated with maleness before anything. When cis women have it applied to them, that primary meaning gets to fall away temporarily because their womanhood, their validity, cannot be questioned. By design of cissexism, it cannot be questioned without undermining the sex and gender binaries and the power cis people wield. 

So cis women get access to the term temporarily, in a non-serious non-threatening manner. But it’s still one of the most male-coded words, it’s infused with maleness, and attributing to a trans woman is the exact same as calling her a man, a male person, because we don’t have cis privilege.

As for if you’re naive, honestly, there’s always a variety of reasons why folks don’t know this stuff, why they don’t pick up on this stuff. Whether it’s age, or lack of prior education, lack of exposure to trans women, naivete, etc., most people are unaware. So don’t feel guilty on that front. Everyone has to learn sometime...when the opportunity rolls around doesn’t matter so much as what folks do with the opportunity. A lot of people choose not to think too hard about it, not to concern themselves. It’s a good thing to learn, and it’s good that you’re thinking about it now.

Yeah, the big jot-note list of questions points out the flaws in the g!p/abo stories. Like, it’d be nice if authors actually did write more representative stuff...it wouldn’t actually be difficult, and it’d make for better, more engaging stories, and it’d help fandom be less exclusionary and hostile for us. There’s such a wealth of possibilities when writing trans woman characters, or intersex women, but all so many writers and readers care about are these fetishistic fantasies that get them off. There’s a considerable lack of care and concern about us as real, complex human beings. 

And there’s no disrespect. I can see Clexa stuff on tumblr, see fanart of Clarke and Lexa, it doesn’t usually bother me unless it’s fetishistic stuff (but i’ve blocked the artists of those so they don’t show up on my dash). Sometimes if I think only about Lexa, yeah, things can get soured, but so long as it’s canon material or art that looks canon-aligned, I’m generally good. Sad, given what JRoth and the show’s writers did, but I can handle sadness a lot better than dysphoria.

My issue is that I need to essentially get into the heads of my characters when i write, and whenever I try to get into Lexa’s, I can’t help but think about all the stories and depictions of her that are transmisogynistic and hurtful and fetishistic. I can’t block those memories and thoughts out when I’m trying to mentally collect everything I know about her as a character to decide how she’d behave or react in character in my stories, what she’d say, what she’d do, etc. There’s such a drastic split in who’s been used as a vehicle for trans fetishization that it’s essentially left barely any harmful material on Clarke’s end, which is why it’s so easy for me to write Clanya. So I can’t write Lexa as a character, because the process disgusts and upsets me, and I can’t watch the show because it makes me sad, and I can’t engage in fandoma and other people’s fanworks all that much because so many people are unsafe. So her character’s just altogether been tainted for me.

And it sucks, because like you said, so many people rushed to fandom as a balm to their pain from the loss of Lexa and the betrayal from the show. And it just hurt that so many could do that, knowing how it felt to be hurt and betrayed by writers that created cheap harmful content instead of good representative content, only to turn around and create mountains of cheap harmful content that sent trans women out of the fandom in droves, without much of anywhere to go, no big social network to bond together with and help each other with the pain and loss. All those people who would loudly yell “Support your sisters, not just your Cis-ters”, and then push us out of fandom without a care in the world to the hurt they caused us.

Yeah, these tropes have been around a while. A/B/O is relatively newish, having cropped up in the past decade, but it’s just a big mash-up of common tropes like g!p, mpreg, werewolf, bestiality, dubcon, sex pollen, BDSM, etc. So they’ve definitely been in and around OUAT across its tenure, I did a minor survey on that fandom’s use of g!p and its own magical variant, magic!cock. it’s been in Glee. In X-Files. In Xena. Lower volume, but there are g!p works out there in just about everything. Easy to ignore if they’re rare, outliers. 

In recent years, though, with greater exposure to trans women in media, there’s been a boom in mainstream trans-women porn. And, mirroring that growth in that male-driven market, there’s been a big boom in g!p fiction. It used to be small and largely avoidable, and now it’s everywhere and growing in popularity still. The 100 is just a fandom where it’s been the most saturated in femslash. There were more g!p works in Glee’s fandom, but Glee’s femslash fanfiction count dwarfs Clexa and other femslash fanfiction in The 100 fandom.

But the big boom of popularity in The 100 wasn’t just self-contained. All the ones who took to the trope, those who felt compelled to write about it, they’re carrying that desire to the new fandoms they’re in. WLW fandom does migrate, it’s a big running joke, so when we migrate, these patterns continue.

And while, yeah, a lot’s happened, and not a lot of people like to talk about what’s wrong in fandom, most folks try to avoid conflict. But stuff like this is important. It needs to be talked about, because people need to be aware, they need to learn, they need to see what’s happened/happening because of trans fetishization. Most don’t want to, but they need to know. They need to think about this and understand.

Anywho, it’s cool. I’m half asleep and rambling, and just happy to know that of the 14 messages that found there way into my inbox last night, a few of them were positive and good stuff. I like when people learn, when they want to learn. it’s a good, healthy thing. I’m glad I managed to help you understand the situation better. Feel free to hit me up again if you have any questions in the future :) I hope you have a good day!

[neurunique]

Hopefully this app don’t crash

Cause I’m about to write a RitalinRealisation🌈

First things first, I write so much shit before I get to the final point. So if ya get impatient skip to the end but trust me it’ll be WORTH IT.

was sitting in bed studying chemistry work when I realised something.

So for most of my life up until I started medication, I had symptoms of “bipolar 2”, ADD, autism spectrum, obsessive compulsive... etc. let’s just go short version and say I’m on the spectrum with a bit of manic depression occasionally (it’s honestly so rare I tried medication for it once and I turned into a zombie and I’ve received cognitive therapy for it so I’m STABLE that’s the main part) with VERY TEMPORARY and STRANGE attention span.

So let’s talk like... obsessions or “special interests”.

Whole life filled with obsessions where my brain just would. Not. Even. Try. To pay attention to ANYTHING other than the special interest; every conversation dictated by it etc, people be like can you talk about anything else? Like looool. Funny to look back at that (I still do it occasionally. It ain’t a bad thing I love it just damn it had some impact on those around me) and so when I got super obsessed my BRAIN would be like I Am SO HAPPY, I HAVE SO MANY IDEAS, THIS IS SO INTERESTING! TIS IS MY LIFE NOW. EVERYTHING REVOLVES around it, and it’s all I want to do, EVER. So like naturally my school grades were up and down during obsession phases, like, sometimes I’d get straight A in assignments I could relate TO THE OBSESSIONS. Like fuck me the train of thought would just COME. So I was good at that, most reports from school were like “Petal is amazing at what she’s INTERESTED IN but won’t even THINK about trying what she isn’t” (could’ve used Ritalin a long time ago tbh but irrelevant). Anyway anyway . DOPAMIne. That’s what I realised today. DOPAMIne and obsessions ! I draw write sing imagine... to do with the obsession and then bam dopamine. High of life . Who cares why, fights at home or rejection from peers it’s FINE I just DOPAMINE. It’s all I needed. And so yes, whenever I GO OFF MY MEDS IVE NOTICED

That like (why is Tumblr’s enter gap so huge ) I get that obsession mindset again, like I can’t do anything without the special interest. With my meds, the interest is still there, but my dopamine or mood is like LEVEL and not DEPENDENT on the obsession. Like I can do shit, study and converse and socialise and learn social skills I never did , with the dopamine levelled our. So like Ritalin doesn’t give me skills, it gives me balance . and when I go off it, I get “manic” as others see it, however it’s literally just the increase of dopamine due to the obsession dependence returning (literally opposite of drug dependence; the drug is the antidote and my brain is the dependence)

I’m literally just Sherlock Holmes addicted to my brain like a narcissist

AnywAaaay

So the times I’ve written bullions of fanfics about sonic? ~”manic episode” as they say MORE LIKE SUPER INVOLVED IN MY SPECIAL INTEREST

Gaming for ten hours to make one goal? Not manic just hyper focused because I love the game and the act and the repetition .

So yep. The conclusion is essentially this: my special interests are pervasive as fuck and luckily I can manage them with the use of awareness of sugar intake and dopamine levels otherwise influenced by things apart from medication; Ritalin helps me regulate dopamine but to be honest it sends me to sleep half the time (probably cu when I have the dopamine already, it’s like no sleepy time no mania for you); and it helps me be human - for the most part! I still burn out like a motherfucker, even on it - social interactions are draining during times of adjustment or stress (mostly always); I can only manage one or two a day now that I live with my partner. I could literally achieve a fucking whole novel if it was about my obsession (current ones are seven deadly sins and sonic of course although that ones kinda melting a bit, BAN FOR LIFE) without Ritalin to regulate myself, like I don’t feel dead inside on medication as some peopl describe it , I more feel like I can put aside those intense urges and addictions towards my obsessive behaviours and just carry on and FOCUS on things that aren’t the obsessions

Honestly if it wasn’t for the fact I get special interests, most of my symptoms would just be ADD. But ASD INCLUDES like special interests and social cues deterance (I been learning thougu, thanks to focus being level). So yeppp.

Oh also, Ritalin is more effective for me than Dexies because:

Dexies actually increase dopamine directly whereas Ritalin is simply a “dopamine reuptake” so like in my mind I feel like it doesn’t release dopamine , it simply does what the brain needs (my brain). Hence why people probably prefer aderall over Ritalin for study drugs whereas Ritalin helps me actually function,

If I’m tired, it’ll wake up a bit. Or it’ll send me to sleep. If I’m deep in mania or dependence on obsess, it’ll send me to sleep or bring me back to reality.

Antipsychotics don’t work on me; they make the world blurry and fuzzy and confusing; I am not psychotic and it doesn’t calm me down and it just makes me more anxious.

Tried to ask for benzos for when I’m anxious but doctor was like no ;.; good thing I am relearning my therapy skills.

I am extremely high functioning as an aspie, but the requirements to work thirty hour week jobs or 9-5 will just never be there for me. In terms of social burn out, even once I’ve leRned all I can about people and friendships, my brain will not be able to process it. If I live alone it’s easier but I love my partner So. I need so much alone time and he knows that, sometimes I feel bad but it’s just who I am. And I have tried to work normal hours before but I just can’t. Inwant to be able to work from home one day, whether it’s art (gosh I wish) or research... people mistake me for having depression or social anxiety but while I have a few symptoms of both at times (anxiety is super severe tbh) it originates from things like social burn out and claustrophobia. I am managing though and doing therapy SOON yay. I just had to write all this cause I’m trying so hard in real life not to explain my Behavior, something I done my whole life; now that I have been screened and I’m being officially diagnosed with spectrum disorders it’s just so tempting to rigt my wrongs with people by saying hey! This is why I did stuff that was confusing!

Aspergers doesn’t define me though nor is it my identity; I’m still ME the me I’ve always been; it’s great to get help for it but I really have to pay attention to my strengths and meet goals. Cuz it’s so exciting to have these revelations !! Hence text post!! But when I say it in person I speak too fast or too slow or I mumble and people think I’m MANIC (yes I appear manic but honestly just excited orndopamine releaze) by the way don’t ever tell someone they come across as manic unless you know the legit symptoms and you can differentiate between someone who’s excited about a special interest or realisation, or whatever, and actual manic episodes (they tend to last over a week and are accompanied by many symptoms including no sleep or food aswell as sometimes a lot of things beyond physical capabilities; sitting on the toilet writing an essay while relaxed and in the middle of assignments ain’t mania Jsyk) lots of my aspie friends get super happy about stuff or connection and we seem manic but we ARENT so just listen to the exact words we use and respond accordingly. Like... that’s just me tho. Sometimes I’m upset and it’s different, that’s just regarding conversation about shit I’m excited about~~~

SO YEP 👍 THATS MY RANT THank you Edit: I am manic bipolar

[smolragematti]

To the YOI fandom: Love on Ice controversy.

This is from the perspective of an tech/art student and someone who has to study film and do research.

Note: I dont normally get involved with this type of thing, even ship wars. But this is something I wanted to address because its popping up on FB, Instagram and Tumblr.

So… it has recently come to my attention that many people in the Yuri on Ice fandom are complaining and even attempting to boycott/petition to stop it/EVEN GOING SO FAR AS TO TELL KUBO TO SUE HALLMARK due to the announcement of a new direct to TV movie called Love On Ice.

My only answer to you is STOP.

Youre embarrassing yourselves.

Let me explain.

Yuri On Ice was in production for 4 years doing impressive amounts of research to truly appreciate ice skating in all its beauty. Their effort paid off with the beautiful series. With an anime that balanced both its romantic side and sports ice skating, gaining the praise of professional ice skaters like Johnny Weir.

THIS (love on ice) IS A FUCKING HALLMARK MOVIE. ITS NOT GOING TO BE ANYWHERE NEAR THE GREATNESS OF YURI ON ICE. IT IS A CHEESY CHICK FLICK THATS PROBABLY MORE FOCUSED ON THE ROMANCE THAN ICE SKATING.

DO YOU REALLY FEEL THREATENED BY LIKELY TO BE A FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT HALLMARK MOVIE?!? IT WONT EVEN COMPARE TO IT. IT WONT HAVE THE PRAISE OF ICE SKATERS INTERNATIONALLY NOR THE GIANT FANDOM YURI ON ICE HAS.

If youre still confused/angry or think it was stealing or need more than just a salty college student yelling, continue to read.

Movies take a long time to make. Brave took 3 years just to get her curly hair perfectly natural. Frozen was originally thought off back during WW2 but kept getting transfered and shelved because they couldnt make it work at the time. Studio Ghibli takes its time making movies and spending hard work and time to make its animated films. Even Steven Universe takes a year to make its episodes which are usually 11 minutes long. As does family guy and the simpsons. While the media entertainment seems like it can pop out whatever it wants, there are still layers of work that go into its production and the effort that team puts into it will show when the finished product is released (just look at straight to DVD sequels from Disney movies, theyre generally pretty bad. And this is from the power house known as Disney.)

I would believe it was stealing/plagiarism/violation of copyright if there was a bigger difference in time between the release of the movie and the anime but the actors and skaters still have to ice skate (if they even do that for more than 10 minutes). Movies take time (depending on budget, writing the script, storyboarding, designing, staff, actors, choreographers, editting, etc) and its going to be released soon (in january 2017). By the time YOI came out, this was more than likely in post production. After the script was finalized, after all the acting and shit was done and really all that needed to be finished was editting and special effects. So when would they have the time to find out about YOI and insidiously plot a revenge plan to take ice skating back from the homosexuals (as some believe). Its simple. They couldnt.

The people saying its copying the plot. No, its not. The coach student romantic relationship plot is nothing new. Like seriously. Its not revolutionary. YOI is special because executed the relationship in a natural fluid way while also providing a healthy LGBT relationship, something rarely portrayed in media, much less anime. Having someone get out of something they once loved only to find a renewed interest due to someone else’s interactions in their life isnt anything new either. Ice skating is also part of various others media enterment. So no, they arent stealing.

At this point. Its the execution that matters more that its basic premise.

If you think its bad, then dont fucking give it the time of day. Stop giving it your attention. This also means let it flop on its own. Dont go writing nasty reviews because youre butt hurt. Like i said above IT IS A FUCKING HALLMARK MOVIE. Let it fade into obscurity. I bet you couldnt even name 3 hallmark movies from memory without help.

Make your memes. Say something funny. But dont give your anger because then youre just giving it attention that youre arguing it doesnt deserve. Stop that pathetic petition. Not saying you cannot be mad, just that its not worth your anger.

Support Yuri on Ice, the studio responsible for the masterful series, its creators, animators, designers and their inspirations, and buy official merch. It being dubbed by funimation (regardless of you liking the dub or not) means it will be easier for the western fans to get their hands on some form of official merchandise. Make YOI art. Cosplay. And be glad we have a meaningful series rather than another queerbaiting show, anime no less.