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magics-neptunes-things · 1 year ago

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Jealousy or caring?

Hi guys :)

After the results of the survey, this is the story you have choosen. I may write the others too though.

Summary : This one talk about jalousy and everything who can come out of it, whether it’s little cute reconciliations or a little more complicated repercussions.

TW : Jealousy, discomfort with her feelings, a little angst.

Enjoy!

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Looking at your sleepy girlfriend, you gently raise your hand to caress her face. Your gesture is gentle and delicate, afraid to wake her up. Alexia’s moments of rest are so rare these days that you do everything you can to make them as restful as possible.

You loved everything about her, even her jealousy. Or, as she prefers to call it, her caring. As the days, weeks, months and even years went, you realize that Alexia's jealousy caring has different colors.

********

Losing has never been easy for anyone. But you must admitted that on your side, you are perhaps less accustomed than some of your fellow teammates. You’ve been playing at FC Barcelona for a few years now and the few times you’ve lost have traumatized you. Perhaps because it often happened in the finals, you must admit that disappointment is always up to the hopes and efforts that have been made to get there.

Your national team is a little less successful than your club though. You are of Norwegian origin and even though you qualified for the last World Cup, you are having a little trouble earning points for the next Cup. After another loss, you find yourself in the last place in the ranking and the bitterness that reigned in the locker room after your defeat is still well anchored in you.

You're actually lying on your bed of the hotel room that you share with Ingrid Engen, your bestie, who also plays in Barcelona. You’ve both been staring at the ceiling without saying a word, unable to sketch the slightest gesture. You are lying in a V-shape on the same bed, the legs of the brunette on yours. You’re playing the game in your head again and again and the things you could have done otherwise to allow your team to win. And you know that it’s the same kind of things that also turn in Ingrid’s head.

You only get out of your lethargy when you feels your mobile phone vibrate in the pocket of your jogging, making you jump. You startle Ingrid at the same time and she throws you a glare while you roll your eyes, wriggling on the bed to extract your phone. Looking at the screen, you smile when you see that it's your girlfriend. You pick up and wait patiently for the few seconds necessary for the Facetime call to connect.

The black screen gives way to Alexia’s face and your heart tightens when you remember that she's thousands miles away from you. Even if Ingrid is your best friend, you’d rather be lying in the same bed as Alexia.

"Holà Bebita" makes you affectionately the latina and you smile tenderly.

"Hi."

"How are you feeling?"

You pout and shrug. Always lying on your back on your bed and your blond hair in halo around your head, you are not sure of the effect, but never mind. You don’t answer with words, but that’s enough for Alexia to understand what you mean. She can’t stand to lose, too.

"For what it’s worth, you played very well."

"Not good enough apparently"

You grumble, but you’ve seen a few comments from frustrated fans who feel like you should have found situations to get the ball in the net a second time. Your equalizer wasn't enough to save your team and a few minutes before the end of the match the opposing team scored the goal of the victory.

Alexia frowns when you say that and you already know the words she will say. They are always the same when a teammate takes the team’s defeat on her back. However, this doesn't seem to apply to her, she's the first to declare herself guilty during a defeat.

"Hey I forbid you to say that. If you hadn’t done your best, you wouldn’t be that exhausted. How’s Ingrid?"

Preferring not to answer and focusing on her question, you turn your head towards your best friend. She's Alexia's friend too after all. The brunette imitates you a few seconds later and your lack of common energy ends up amusing yourself. So it's with a slight smile that you bring your attention to the screen and Alexia.

"She's laying down on my bed and didn’t even have the courage to get fully dressed after her shower."

"Perdóna me?"

You hoped to tease Alexia’s jealousy, but it's finally Mapi’s face that appears on the screen, her eyebrows frowning. You are surprised to see her, Alexia didn't inform you that she was in her company, but not entirely astonished. If Ingrid is your best friend, Mapi is definitely Alexia’s. This allows the four of you to have great moments together, even if Alexia and you are less likely to party than the other two.

"Y/N why is my girlfriend not answering her phone and naked on your bed?!"

"Holà Maria" you laugh.

"Mapi give me my phone back!" your hear Alexia in the background and some noise make you realize that she's really trying to take it back.

This chaos makes you smile and ends up shaking Ingrid from her lethargy. She rolls on her stomach to also watch the screen of your phone. Even if for the moment you have a breathtaking view of the ceiling of Alexia’s living room, then some fingers, then a black background and finally Alexia’s face again, with Mapi pouting in the background.

"Hi darling" Ingrid smiles when she sees her girlfriend. "My phone battery was discharged, I call you as soon as it comes back on."

You laugh when you see Mapi's face but Ingrid slaps you on the head and you frown.

"Hey" you whined, rubbing your head with your hand, as Ingrid gets up from bed to check her phone.

It actually had to come back on since you lost time to look at the ceiling and when she unplugs it from the cable, you look at your screen again. When the brunette informs you that she will call Mapi, you decide to plug in your headphones so you can focus on the conversation you have with Alexia. And besides, your roommate is doing the same. Rolling on your side, face on the wall, you look at your perfect lady.

"I miss you so much"

The confession you make to the blonde isn’t surprising, even if you are not physically demonstrative in public, you are very often together. Alexia actually has more things to do outside of trainings than you do, but you have at least all your evening together.

"I miss you too" Alexia replies before hesitating to continue "… but Ingrid was really not naked, huh?"

********

Alexia's jealousy, excuse-me, caring, wasn't always cute and nice actually. At the beginning of your relationship, you decided not to tell the fans. Partly because you didn’t want to deal with the reactions it would cause, but also because you wanted to be sure it would be a serious relationship. To be perfectly honest, you already knew on your side that this was the case but you didn't want to put too much pressure on Alexia, believing that she already had enough things to manage like this.

Her insecurities have always surprised you, even if she never really talked about it. She never accused you of anything and you know perfectly well that she never searched in your phone either for example. But the fear that sometimes colors her eyes when she sees you talking to another girl surprised you so much the first time that you told yourself that you were imagining things. Spoiler, you weren't.

You also remember perfectly well the time when you were looking for an enveloppe with pictures of your childhood in your apartment, making a mess in your living room. "I’m sure Anna put it in there" you mumbled, head down in a drawer.

"Who is Anna?"

The question was thrown as lightly as if Alexia had asked you the weather for the next day. But when you turned around, her face seemed too smooth and the fact that she looked away very suspicious. Again, there were no accusations in her behavior or tone of voice.

"My cousin? Who came last week?"

"Oh."

And with that, Alexia had moved on to another subject after a few seconds. You felt her relief and you saw how her whole body suddenly relaxed. It was always like that with the blonde. She has never been in the habit of talking about her emotions and even if she shows you that she loves you and cares about you, she is not the type of person to make you long love declarations. But you love her this way.

********

Because of all this, the first time her jealousy really took over her, you were taken by surprise.

It was during a casual match with a team in the middle of the ranking. You were easily winning and the match took place in a rather good general atmosphere, the visitors being rather respectful of the game.

This didn't prevent a bad tackle from an opposing player on you, more clumsy than voluntary, throwing you to the ground with a stabbing pain in the tibia. This pain made you stay a few seconds on the floor during which you resumed your breathing. The player in question quickly leaned over you to apologize, making sure nothing serious happened to you. You didn’t even calculate her hand on your shoulder, but you willingly accepted the helping hand that Alexia held out to help you up, taking you away from the other girl.

"I'm ok" you simply reassured her, taking her suspicious look as an interest on her part for your leg.

Well, you still think she was worried about that too. But, head in your game, you went back to your position and you didn’t think about this incident again.

When the referee whistled the famous three shots, you stayed on the pitch for several minutes to chat with your teammates and go sign some jerseys and take some pictures. After examining your tibia, you saw that a bruise has starting to form and the medical team asked you not to wait too much before going to put at least a little ice on it.

So you apologized to the fans and walked into the hallway leading to the locker room. It was at this moment that the player of the opposing team came after you, calling you by your first name. Surprised, you turned around and smiled at her when she made sure once again that you were okay.

You showed her your tibia to reassure her and with that you started to discuss a bit about the game. She ended up asking for a jersey swap and after a few seconds of hesitation, you agreed. It was at this very moment that Alexia made her appearance and the timing could probably not be worse.

Even if you had nothing to reproach yourself, she nevertheless found herself facing the image of her girlfriend only dressed in her shorts and a sports bra, facing another girl wearing her jersey. All of this with a few laughs that reflected on the walls of the corridor and the hand of the opponent placed on your arm to thank you.

The moment you met her gaze, you knew the situation was going to be complicated. Alexia were frozen a few feet from you, but you perfectly saw her jaw contract and the muscles of her hands tense.

You naturally ran after her when she turned around and it took you the whole way to the locker room for her to at least agree to look at you. And you had to take her face in your two hands since saying her name repeatedly, asking her to listen to you seemed to have no effect.

"Ale, Baby, look at me"

You had to put yourself on tiptoes to have your eyes at her level and finally really have her attention. The way she pushed your hands back into that corridor and walk with a quick step while shaking her head and not even looking at you gave you the impression that she was only there physically.

You never raised your voice, feeling that it would only make things worse. And you were right. Alexia’s eyes cut off your breathing and for once it wasn’t in the right way. The anger she had felt a few moments ago seemed to have deserted her mood, replaced by distress and insecurity.

You were alone in the locker room but you knew there were risks that it would not last. And Alexia would never want to be seen in this state of emotions by anyone. So, ignoring your bruise, you informed her you were taking her home. You left her no choice and she didn't protest, which may seem surprising coming from Alexia, but you were relieved to see that she was not trying to run away from you anymore.

The ride was quiet and it was a relief when you arrived in the safety of your apartment. That said, you didn’t really know what to do with your girlfriend, suddenly turned into a mute wall, looking at nothing. So you made the decision to sit her on your couch and kneel in front of her, between her legs. The fact that you are both still in football outfits added to the strangeness of the scene.

"Ale?"

Her gaze rests on you and the emotions that were previously there was added the fact that she seems lost. You put your hands on her lap and you look at her for a long time, not really knowing what to say. But you end up choosing what you think is most important.

"I know what you saw and that it may have seemed inappropriate, but I swear there was nothing. She just apologized and asked me to swap our jerseys"

You feel her gaze scan you and you let her do it, leaving her the time she needs. She finally nods, but you’d like her to talk to you, explain what’s going on in her head. Except she seems incapable of it for the moment.

"Come on, let’s take a shower."

You hope that the hot water will allow Alexia to relax and gather her ideas and you let her enter the shower first. Until she finishes, you unpack your bags and you decide to make her a cup of tea. Even if you are not English, your mom had this habit when someone was not well and you took the same way.

To give her as much privacy as possible, you left some spare clothes and you wait patiently on your sofa for her to come out of the bathroom. Looking at your phone, you realize that your hurry departure surprised some of your teammates and you don’t wait to answer them that everything is fine and that you are together. You can already imagine the kind of gritty scenario that Mapi will put herself in the head.

When your girl had finished, it was your turn and you hurry to go back to her as soon as possible. Despite her silence, you’re afraid you won’t find her when you get out of there. But no, except instead of being on your couch, she’s sitting on the foot of your bed. She plays nervously with her fingers and looks up at you as you slowly enter the room.

"I'm sorry"

You don’t see why she apologizes, but you decide not to ask her a question right now. Instead, you climb in the bed behind her and pull her against you, reversing your bed habits. Usually, it’s you in the role of the little spoon. But this time, she willingly nestles against you and you gently rock her, leaning against the head of the bed.

"Can we talk about it?"

She nods again, but remains silent. Looking for a way to start the conversation, you realize that you feel her heart beating against your skin, testifying to the strength of her emotions.

"Ale, you know I would never do that, right? Cheating in any way. I care too much about you to risk losing you. I only look at you."

Alexia obviously heard you, but you realize she seems to be grappling with words. She never has problems finding the ones that are necessary to motivate her teams or to reassure others, it seems to be another thing to find those to express her emotions. This isn't surprising, once again the number of people to whom she opened must be counted on the fingers of one hand.

"Ok, let me try to help you. How did you feel when you came into this hallway?"

"I wanted to rip her head off."

Well, that was rude but clear. You find yourself trying not to laugh.

"Something else?" you asked, hiding your smile in her hair.

You couldn't do it for long though, since a few seconds later Alexia gets up to sit and face you.

"I know you would never do anything like that, but that doesn’t stop me from fearing losing you. If I told you that I trust you, but I don’t trust others, would you understand the difference?"

You nod and replace a strand of her hair behind her ear.

"I don't care about the others, though"

"I know I'm beeing stupid b..."

You interrupt her by placing a finger on her lips, making her look up at you for the first time since she spoke again.

"Don't. You're not stupid because you feels emotions Alexia. You're an human, not a robot"

"I don't know what to do with all this emotions" she mumble.

"Talking to me can help?"

You try a smile and she gives you a smirk back. That's a beginning right? You take her again against you and she half sit on your lap, her face against your shoulder. The silence is this time more relaxing and you feel Alexia relax in your arms.

"Thanks for getting me out of there before the others saw me like that."

"Always here for you, Love."

********

But Alexia can be possessive too.

As time passed, she learned to deal with her frustrations differently. When a girl has looked at you for too long for her taste at a party for example, it isn't uncommon that you find yourself the next day with scattered hickeys all over your body. Your bond has continued to grow and your understanding to evolve to the point that you can understand each other only in a few seconds, without even having to speak.

This connection has obviously been noticed by almost everyone, but there are only two people who can brag about knowing Alexia perhaps better than you. Alba, her little sister, but especially Eli, her mother. This one is grateful to you for regularly bringing her eldest daughter home, apart from the weekly diner organized at home. At first, you refused to accompany Alexia, preferring to let her spend time alone with her mother and sister. But, when your girlfriend informed you that her mother was about to sulk you permanently, you ended up going every week.

"Here you are at last!" Eli said the first time you went back.

You laughed and gave her a hug before you went to greet Alba. If Alexia quickly dragged you into the family lounge to watch their usual series, Eli eventually commandeered your help in the kitchen. Laying a kiss on Alexia’s head who hums and smile at you, you obviously agreed and found yourself peeling carrots with your mother-in-law.

You expected remonstrance from what you told Alexia, but instead you find yourself facing Eli’s inquisitive gaze.

"You swear to tell me nothing but the truth?"

"Uh… yeah?"

You are intrigued but also a little worried. You don't see what you could have hidden from her, but she has the same effect on you as when you have to pass the security gate of the customs at the airport.

"It’s been weeks since you were seen here. I thought you and Alexia broke up and she didn’t have the courage to tell me."

"Oh… no, everything is fine between us" you assured her by turning your attention to your carrots.

"Really? You’re not pretending to be always together so you don’t worry me?"

"Promised"

You smiled at her and after a few seconds scanning the blue of your eyes, she responded to your smile. Realizing that Alexia has the same way of looking through your eyes amuses you a lot.

"Why would you worry anyway?" you ask, frowning. "Alexia could find someone else in a snap of the fingers."

Eli snorts and you turn your attention to her.

"Maybe she could, but I sincerely doubt that she will find someone as good for her as you are. She hadn’t been with anyone for a long time before you came from your freezing Norway. I was genuinely afraid that she would never find someone good enough for her. I never asked you if you want children or getting married like I know Alexia want to, because I know that the bond you both have will take you where you have to be."

What could you have said to that? Nothing. So you cut those damn carrots, lost in your thoughts. You are obviously convinced that Alexia is made for you, otherwise you would never have been with her for so long. But you never claimed you were made for her in return.

After the carrots, you attacked another kind of vegetables, always in silence. Hearing your mother-in-law talk to you about marriage and children is rather peculiar, you never really touched the subject with Alexia. You obviously noticed the way she behaves with children and it makes your heart melt every time. You know she’ll make a good mom when her turn comes, but you don’t know if she wants to have that with you. You don’t even live together right now, after almost a year of dating. Even if you are more at her home than at yours.

"What have you done to my girlfriend?"

Not seeing you coming back to her, Alexia ended up leaving her couch to come see what’s happening in the kitchen. She knows you well enough to realize that you are lost in your thoughts and not necessarily light things. But by your side, Eli gathers the vegetables in a pan to start cooking them.

"Nothing, we were just talking mija."

The look Alexia gives you is uncertain and you give her a small smile that you hope reassuring. (It’s not). Eli sends you back to the living room and you follow your girlfriend to finish the current episode. At the end, Alba decrees that she has a call to make and Alexia takes you with her to the garden. Her fingers are tangled with yours and you looked up at the sky that darkens when she draws you against her. You let her do it and you find yourself facing her, her hand coming on your cheek. This gesture intrigues you, not that Alexia isn't tender with you, but you wonder what is behind her head.

"Are you ok?"

"I am"

You answer and, taking advantage of your proximity, you kiss her softly on her lips. A few seconds later you pass your arms around her neck to extend the kiss, enjoying of this sweat moment during which you get lost in all of her. But Alexia, determined to know more, finally backs down to plunge her gaze into yours.

"Talking to my mother about things you don’t want to talk to me about now?"

Alexia has arched an eyebrow and looks amused, but you know perfectly well that behind this light air, there is a real concern. You laugh gently though, taking the time to kiss her again before answering her.

"Do you want children?"

"I… What?"

"Living with me? Getting married?"

"Y/N - "

"Maybe get a brother or a sister for Nala?"

"A pomeranian?"

You laugh slightly but shake your head gently. Without releasing your hands around her neck, you back your face a few centimeters to have a better view of her.

"Have you ever thought about a future together, you and me?"

Alexia bites her lip and slightly tilts her head to the side while looking at you. The length of time it takes him to answer you creates a knot in your stomach and you detach this time your hands around her neck. You’re trying to pull back a little more, but Alexia’s arms around your waist are holding you back.

"Don’t take this the wrong way, okay?"

Well that’s a bad start. You only frown for answer and look forward to the rest.

"The first time I saw you, I knew. I knew you would be the one I wanted to live with. I want everything you just described, even though the second dog didn’t come to my mind."

You smirk and arch an eyebrow. As she spoke, you felt your stomach relax and your heart rate drop. But you don’t interrupt her, having learned over time that if you wanted to know more about her deep thoughts, you have to let her talk.

"You were more than patient with me, you knew how to get to know me and understand me better than anyone else. I fell in love with you the very moment you walked into the gym, half hiding behind Ingrid."

The scene is still fresh in your memory and you laugh softly remembering it. You were impressed, more than ever, to be faced with world-class players.

"I know my jealousy is sometimes difficult to deal with, but I really love you more than anything. And I don’t even want to imagine my life without you."

You find yourself without words, for once in the role of the one who is unable to find the right terms to mean what she thinks. You are not used to receiving such statements from your girlfriend, the latina preferring to cover you with attentions and gifts.

So you just pass your arms around her neck and kiss her with everything you have. This kiss is passionate and intense, it makes you completely forget the place where you are currently. Alexia tightened you impossibly close to her and the blonde took the opportunity of a moan from you to slip her tongue between your lips. Both lost in your embrace, you only take a few seconds between each kiss to catch your breath before starting again.

You can’t tell how long you’ve been kissing here, but you’re still grateful that it’s Alba who surprised you rather than your mother-in-law.

"Oh wow, I’m going to have to wash my eyes with bleach" she exclaims as she puts her hands on her eyes. "Diner is ready"

With that, she goes back inside and you laugh slowly before putting your attention back on Alexia. With a smirk, she kiss lightly your neck while whispering "We will resume this conversation later".

********

Over the years, Alexia’s jealousy has continued to punctuate your life. But she always kept a healthy jealousy, never accusing you of anything.

There was for example the time when you went out to a restaurant during your summer vacation. No one seemed to recognize you, allowing Alexia to feel particularly relaxed and comfortable with your physical proximity. You were surprised at the beginning of the stay when she takes your hand in her when you strolled around town or when she joined you on the same deck chair to enjoy a sunbath while cuddling.

The restaurant you booked that night was highly recommended by Ona and Lucy, who had come to the same place some time before. You failed to swallow your gum when you saw Alexia come out of the bathroom after putting on a red dress that showed nothing more than necessary but that made her breathtaking. More than usual.

And she may swear you’re the prettiest of the two, but you don’t believe it for a second. You must restrain yourself so much from letting your eyes slide over her body, in places that only you have the honor of knowing at your fingertips, that you don't realize Alexia’s growing annoyance towards your server.

It's true that he perhaps insists a little too much to know if everything is fine and that he has a strong tendency to talk to only you. It's only when you notice that Alexia’s jaw is a little too tense that you realize that something is wrong. You gently place your hand on hers and caress her skin with your thumb.

"What is it, Bonita?"

"Nothing, don’t worry."

She smiles bravely at you and since she doesn’t want to talk about it, you don’t insist. Instead, you draw her hand to your lips to lay tender kisses. The smile coming back on your girlfriend’s face, you leave this information aside until the end of the meal. After dessert, you forbid Alexia to spend any penny and pay the bill. When the waiter gives you the receipt of your payment, you slip it in your bag without thinking about it for a single second.

After a walk hand in hand, you return to your suite, secretly in a hurry to get rid of your high heels. In truth, you are so in a hurry that you decide to remove them just out of the elevator, highly amusing Alexia.

"Where’s the room card Bebita?" she asks smiling.

"In my bag"

You hand it to her and sigh of relief as you feel your feet breathe again.

"Maybe I will be able to still play football after all" you grumble as Alexia searches your purse for a few seconds, giggling about what you just said.

The sweat sound stop rather abruptly though, making you raise your eyes on her. She was livid. Regaining your seriousness, you take a few steps in her direction and you question her at the same time when she resumes speaking.

"Ale?"

"What is it?"

You frown as you look at the piece of paper she holds in her hand, realizing that this is the receipt you had slip into your purse when leaving the restaurant.

"The restaurant's bill?" you answer, not understanding what was going on.

"No. This."

Despite her calm voice, you see her hand shaking as she approaches the paper from your face. And there you see. The waiter thought it clever to write his phone number in hand, accompanied by a small annotation. "I finish at 0h, call me ;) " Your face drop and you raise your eyes on Alexia again, feeling a wave of panic going through you.

"I'm not... I didn’t see that he wrote that, I never would have taken it! Alexia I swear."

You were scared, really. Alexia had never been as relaxed as she was on this trip and had never behaved the same way with you outside the four walls of your shared apartment. You were terrified that it would make her step back or worse, that she would think that you might be interested in him somehow.

But you soon realize that if she’s angry, it’s clearly not against you. Furiously opening the door of your room thanks to the magnetic card she finally found, Alexia enters like a furious. And you follow her on tiptoe, dropping your shoes next to the door that closes behind you.

"Alexia?"

"Who the hell does he think he is?" Alexia roars, making you wide-eyes. "Wasn’t it visible enough that we were on a date? I’ve practically been drooling over you all night and if your eyes could undress me I wouldn’t be wearing my dress anymore."

Laughing may not be a good idea right now, but your girlfriend’s phrasing still amuses you a lot. You bite your lower lip to avoid to do it and grab her by the arm to prevent it from spinning like a propeller in your room. Drawing her against you, you pass your arms around her waist, unable to access her shoulders. If you got rid of your high heels, this is not the case for Alexia although she is only five centimeters taller than you without it.

"We don't care about him. I’m only yours, Alexia, for as long as you want me."

"Don’t say that kind of thing where you’re gonna get stuck with me for the rest of your life" she grunts against your hair.

"Can’t wait."

#woso x reader #woso imagine #alexia putellas imagine #alexia putellas x reader

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deadly-diminuendo · 1 month ago

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WIP Whenever

Thank you so much @strixamans and @amoremagnificentbastard for the tags! 💖

I have another piece of A Fitting Reunion Chapter 2 to share! For a bit of context, Tav is going through some of his design sketches. It's a bit long, so part of it is under the cut:

It eases you, this repetitive motion, this comforting quiet, this sweet glimpse into the life of the one you love. Until you see it. Until your fingers tighten against the paper. Until you freeze. Not because of the clothing, but because of the model. The shape of her figure. The shade of her skin. The style of her hair. The familiarity of her face. It’s you. He drew you. Like you are his muse. Like he could not help but to think of you. Like he is as in love with you as you are with him.

No, you try to tell yourself, this must be some coincidence. And even if it isn’t a coincidence—and really you should just admit to yourself that this cannot be a coincidence—it cannot mean what you want it to mean, right? Maybe it is just because you are his friend. A real person he can easily visualize in his mind’s eye. Yes, that must be all this is. Yes, of course. You quickly flip through the remaining pages. There is no Karlach, no Gale, no Shadowheart, no Wyll, no Lae’zel, no Halsin, no Jaheira, no Minsc—not that any of them got to know Astarion as well as you did, though. All you find are faceless figures, generic and unremarkable. Until, oh, there you are again. Oh, and once more. And again. And, by the gods, again. “Did something catch your eye, darling?” Astarion asks, lips curled into a smirk, looking and sounding every bit like the cat that got the cream. You pull that first sketch of you out of the pile and set the rest down, holding it in the air for him to see. “Is this me?” “Ah, come to think of it, I did have you in mind when dreaming up that particular outfit, yes.” He shrugs, and the nonchalance of it all vexes you. “And not only this one?” “Not only that one, no. I do think of you often, you know.” No. You don’t know. But maybe you are beginning to know. Beginning to let hope blossom in your heart, brave and beautiful and boundless. He pauses his work, stares at you a moment, meets you eye to eye—and, gods, you feel like you are connecting heart to heart. Soul to soul. He speaks again, eventually, shifting back to a less serious, light-hearted tone. A retreat into his own comfort zone. “What more can I say? I like to imagine you in my clothes, darling.” And out of them, you can almost hear him say. Honestly you could go for a little body to body as well, but you know not to push him. Hells, you are not even a couple. You never will be, says a different voice. An unwelcome voice. Your own voice, ever cruel and destructive. But maybe that voice of yours is wrong. Maybe it isn’t never. Maybe it is just not right now. And you can live with not right now. “Actually,” Astarion continues, “I’m not sure imagination is enough anymore.”

Chapter 2 is super close to being done - and, no guarantees, but my goal is to have it up by this time tomorrow! I'm really happy with how things are going, and I really hope I can share it all with you soon!

No pressure tags (and adding a few new writing mutuals here, so I hope you don't mind!): @preciouslittlebhaalbae @xxnashiraxx @nerdallwritey @obsessedwhyyes @goodgirlgonebard @vividiana @bardic-inspo @honeybee-bard @pinkberrytea + anyone else who sees this who has something they would like to share! 💖

#wip whenever #wip games #astarion #bg3 #astarion fanfiction #a fitting reunion #my wips #my writing

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onyourhyuck · 2 years ago

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SHALALA. | L.TY

— Prologue: “Lay low lay low lay low, baby, keep it low-key.”

— Summary: Where you have to design an outfit for Lee Taeyong a famous fashion model but it leads to you both stripping off your clothes.

— Genre: Smut minors dni. SHALALA is such a bop. Model!taeyong. dom!taeyong. praising praising praising. sneaky link trope. Pussy eating. Overstimulation. Many orgasms. Almost caught (?) Makeout. Female fingering receiving.

— Notes: I love Shalala album so much.

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You’re a designer who’s now working with the most viral and talented fashion model Lee Taeyong.

It is truly an honour you stand in front of the most handsome man in the entire world you’ve laid your eyes upon. You feel almost self conscious about your eyes laying on him. It’s like you thought, you wonder if you even deserve to have such a good moment to watch him. To look at him.

But Taeyong was a friendly guy. He welcomed you. He heard good things about your work and he feels like it fits into the concept he puts out there. The most neo person to live. He bleeds neon green to you. He’s perfect for your work.

You smile. “It’s honestly my greatest accomplishment to have you model for my clothes.” Taeyong smiles back hearing you say this. Every designer tells him this; ‘it’s an honour. I am so glad you allowed me to design this for you.’ But your words seem to have a different meaning and tone to what he usually would hear from other brands.

You spoke with the most raw truth about your work. When Taeyong looks at the clothes you make, they tell a story, they tell a story about every single thought and aspect you make in your head while creating these beautiful things for people to wear.

Taeyong couldn’t wait to see what you will create for him. He can’t wait to see the story you will make for him to see and read. To tell the world and wear it on his sleeves.

“I look forward working with you, Y/n.”

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You’re sat down designing on the paper. The hardest part of being a fashion designer it’s that you have to sketch the idea. You have to brainstorm every part of your muscles to figure something unique, something worth making and trying out. You don’t want Taeyong to wear the most banally shaped and boring designs — because it’s not his concept firstly. Secondly you wish to catch the attention of the public and have people want to scream to wear what Taeyong will wear on that fashion walk.

You want people to look at a certain clothing and think: ‘Wait What! That looks like it’s made by Y/n.’ And you want to get the point across that you want to make your work the most outlandish and outstanding piece of clothing like it is an artwork that must be hung up in a museum somewhere.

This was your goal and you knew the moment you needed a model to do the right job it would have to be no one else but Lee Taeyong.

He has your vibe. He has style and the body you need. And most importantly he has the face and personality that fits right into your branding.

You sketch on the paper many designs various sizes and shapes; a shirt in a shape of a triangle? Pair of trousers with rectangle stitching ends? You did anything you found to be fitting. You let your mind run wild.

“Y/n what colour do you want the first stage outfit to be?” Your co-worker Johnny who worked for you for many of your fashion shows and such. He was another designer too, and without him you’d be a lost cause you thought.

You trail busy looking at the pieces of papers checking out the outfits you have sketched. He was behind you holding many blocks of colours and he saw you were too far looking at the papers than at him. “Hmm…I have a vision… but I can’t seem to see it clearly.” Johnny hears you say that with a sigh.

His eyebrows rise up on his face. “How come? What’s your vision.”

You hum putting the papers down on the desk as your chair turns around. You’re now facing Johnny. “I want the audience to go wild when they see someone like Taeyong; I mean he’s handsome. He has a face that anyone would want. I want his clothes to equal that.” Someone with Taeyong’s face would want to be shown off.

Johnny can understand that your points coming cross may be from your stress and overthinking though you have a point, when he looks at Taeyong he imagines something weird. He wants a weird outfit.

“I think we should make something weird. Something out of the norm-you’d-usually go in the direction of.”

You squint your eyes as you hear this. The sudden wave of realisation puts you into a trapping reality like you were dreaming out of nowhere so you’re now going to be through a lane of ideas trafficking at your fingertips. You turn around quickly, “You’re a genius Johnny…” Johnny had no idea what you were now drawing. But it seems like he made you tick in a different direction now. As per usual his guidance always makes you bring out the best ideas out of yourself.

In a few minutes you’ve drawn the perfect picture of what your vision actually was. Johnny was brought in closer to the desk next to you leaning down with one arm stretching out to hold the table. He looks proud. He looks satisfied and it’s a lot better than what he expected from you. You smirk looking at the design of what you will be making Taeyong wear; on his first stage fashion walk. You can’t wait but you can already imagine that he will look so good, that he will have no choice but to take people’s breathes away and leave them unable to look away from him. As if he was a siren possessing anyone in his reach.

“It’s perfect.” Johnny told you satisfied.

You grin. “He’s going to be the centre of everyone’s attention now.” You we’re sure of it. You were confident and you could already tell in the future it will be like that.

“What are you going to name it?” Johnny now said asking you and you raise an eyebrow humming.

Your eyes sparkle when you click your fingers in the air as if you finally found the perfect title to name this outfit design you have created.

Something weird for something weird to wear.

“I am going to name it,”

“Shalala.”

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Taeyong would be in the fitting rooms awaiting for your arrival. It was early morning and he was surprised to have been called in so early. You had a great chance to be making many finalists decisions for the cat walk designs but it seems like you had made something so special that you told him to come to your studio this early in the morning. He was excited he won’t lie. Taeyong loves your work and he meant it when he told you he loved every single piece you have created from the beginning of your uprising career. There was never a moment where he disliked any piece of your work and he can proudly say this that he will not be left ashamed. He’s bewildered with anticipation.

He has no idea of what you will be showing him today; no idea what you have called it. No idea what it could be. He just knows you made something and he’s about to find out what.

He’s alone in your studio waiting until you come inside with a welcoming smile. The moment you strut forward to give him a greeting hug from you, in which he gladly accepts, the whiff of your sweet fruity perfume attacks his nostrils in the most pleasant way possible. You smell so good he couldn’t resist from wanting to smell more of it but he restrains himself. Surprised by your beautiful smile too, you pull away from him first.

Letting the hug go you beam happily. “It’s so good to see you again Taeyong. Did you get here safe?” You ask mentioning a polite voice. Taeyong was starstruck watching you. He wasn’t expecting you to be this happy to see him. But he was glad you were happy because your smile truly did something in his stomach. Something special.

“Yes I got here safe.” Taeyong smiles gently as he nods. “My managers are getting us coffee. I told them to get an americano for us both. I hope that’s okay?” He wasn’t sure what to give you because he wasn’t sure what you’d like or not so he got the same drink as what he would get hoping you wouldn’t mind.

You were surprised he was buying you coffee anyways; it’s your first time getting offered a cup of coffee from a model.

You smile at him, though your heart skipped a beat by his compassionate gesture. “Ah yes Americano is perfect thank you. You didn’t have to.”

‘Thank god. It would’ve been so awkward if she didn’t drink coffee…’ Taeyong trails to his own thoughts.

You now decide to trail to the fitting areas where the outfit you have created. You spent so many all-nighters making the design of the outfit you created with Johnny; secondly you would like to say it’s the most Neo-thing for someone like Taeyong to wear and at this point you know it’s good. Because Taeyong quite literally would bleed Neon Green if he had to. You know that his favourite colour is green so you cooperated that into the outfit.

The only thing you need to do now is to reveal it to him. Your heart’s chasing miles from what you wanted it to be. You were nervous and panicked. You were confident in the outfit but you care so much about Taeyong’s opinion too. He’s the one who will make it go viral. He’s the key and you’re nothing without his good impression on the outfit.

Taeyong’s eyes widen as he was met with your hands revealing the outfit. It was a simple puffer jacket with puffer pants. It gave this most comfortable down to earth look but at the same time it looks so stylish there wasn’t a single bland thing about it even though it was just a puffer jacket and a pair of pants puffer out in the same material. He feels like this was the most beautiful piece of thing he’s seen made perfectly adjusted to his needs; he won’t be cold wearing this that’s for sure. He will be able to walk around and do all the poses models do on the cat walk. The material is soft and fun. It wasn’t boring which is what he finds amazing about this whole thing. You managed to turn something so simple — into something so unique and weird. Which is what he loves so much.

He knew you wouldn’t disappoint him.

“I am now introducing you to: Shalala.”

The jacket was a bright green; vibrant as heck it could blind everyone’s eyes from countries away. Your designs on the jacket was black squares similar to checkers making it compliment the bright distracting green. The black squares made the jacket somehow more tame. Which is what Taeyong found to be the most important part. Balance.

Your work has the perfect balance that many brands should learn from you. Taeyong sticks by these words. Famous Brands should learn from you.

The pants were wide and flown out. Taeyong saw the way the pants were following the black and green patterns now like it was an illusion. He was impressed, mind blown in a way.

He looks back at you with his mouth wide open. “I love this Y/n. Truthfully it’s nothing else I’ve ever seen before but I love that about your work.” He states with genuine emotions.

You smile. He likes it and that’s what matters to you the most. “I’m glad you like it. Honestly I tried to think about your style in general… you have a unique style and I like that.” You softly add. “I wanted you to wear something you’d want to wear.”

“No one else has done that for me.” Taeyong reveals as his eyes were glued on your face now as if they were unable to let go off you in the sight. You turn around with your eyes widen as you saw how intensely he’s been watching you. Somehow your heart starts to beat even more.

‘Why am I feeling so nervous suddenly?…’

Taeyong comes forward watching you as his hands slowly lift themselves to feel the hem of your shirt attaching on your body so nicely. His fingers wrap themselves around your perfectly shaped waist and his gaze lows down to your kissable lips. Somehow he always knew you were attractive but seeing you more and more. Working with you was a pleasure he enjoyed the most. You’re the first designer to make him feel this way. You catch his breath to become hitch.

You knew you shouldn’t be this close to Taeyong. You know how much this can become a scandal if anyone saw you how close he’s closing into your body the gap between you both shrinks and now you could feel his chest pressing on your body with the same amount of intensity your heart was pumping out of your chest. Your eye could pop out their sockets. It definitely feels like it.

You whisper. “Taeyong…we can’t be doing this.” He knew you were right but, the moment feels too good to stop and he can’t help but want more. More of you. More than anything else he’d ever want before. “Shh…” he tells you slowly.

His deep voice was so powerful yet so low and deep you couldn’t help but think perhaps you’re addicted to hearing his deep voice speaking like this to you. And now you don’t want him to stop when he was looking at you with so much emotion.

“Lay low lay low lay low, baby, keep it low-key…”

Your lips crash into his passionately moving in each others shapes. The kiss leaves you feeling more and more detached from reality than before and you never thought getting kissed by the famous Lee Taeyong would make your skin crawl with so many compliments towards him. He was not only so handsome and talented — but he can kiss so good. You never expected to have been able to see this for yourself. To have yourself experiencing such pleasure given to you by Taeyong. The man drags you on top of a desk. The outfit you created was put on the side out of your minds.

What was important now to him was you getting pinned by his tongue in your mouth dominating yours with so much ease it was like an easy game for him. You weren’t sure if this was reality. Or if this was virtuality.

Hearing your moans escaping out when Taeyong pulls apart from your ruby red lips that he could kiss on and on without a singular boredom irking him. Now your neck was begging to be kissed, held, loved and marked by him so much he couldn’t help but launch down to your soft skin. Biting on it carefully leaving beautiful marks behold like you were rewarded.

You shift on the table with your thighs trembling. The way your neck was your most sensitive part; Taeyong was in awe at the effects it gave you.

It made your tremble already and he hasn’t even gotten to the part where he fucks you.

Your eyes were dilated so much. Taeyong could stare at your pupils for hours on end. The way your Iris pupils reflect the light so beautifully proved that you’re light itself.

“Oh god… Taeyong…” you groan when your shirt was pulled off by the model stripping you clean. You couldn’t help but join in pulling his expensive branded clothes. Though you were careful not to rip it. You both succeeded in getting yourselves naked in their arms as Taeyong’s mouth lap on your breasts. Hands condoling your chest with a light squeeze there and then.

The tongue playing by your nipples finding your head hanging back as your shoulders clench up tensing together. Your stomach pressing inwards at your pelvis because of how good it feels to have his warm saliva paint your breasts with it. Like he was a painter and you were his one true canvas masterpiece.

“You like that, Y/n?” Taeyong murmurs against your beautiful breasts he finds them to be the most attractive part of you but he would lie if you weren’t completely attractive head to toe. Because you are. You’re someone who has it all.

And he wants all of you. He strives to be better for you all along.

You nod softly in his response unable to find your words to answer him back but nonetheless he didn’t mind. He prepares you by stretching your wet folds with his two fingertips. You gasp when you feel him watching you, no, he was staring at you as your clenching round his two fingers tightly. Each meaningful movement as stretching you so far you could feel your tongue coming out with your moans. He loves watching you become a mess, from such simple touches, he loves the effect you give out.

You muffle your moans with your palm as Taeyong stops pulling away he leans down to give a soft kitten lick on your clit that makes your hand slide off your face. It was nearly impossible to be quiet when you were getting devoured head on by Taeyong. His hands stretching out your thighs. You feel them greatly and sharply pushing you down and down which only makes your pleasure stronger than your muscles could take.

You couldn’t even tell where you were anymore because you were so lost in the moment feeling your high coming closer that both you and Taeyong couldn’t hear the front door knocking. The voices behind the door belong to the managers, indicating they came back with the coffee they had been waiting to get for the two of you — Taeyong doesn’t stop eating you out as if he was starved unable to get any self control back.

So now you’re on the desk with your thighs spread wide over getting yourself eaten out by your model. And you try not to make any loud sounds that can get you two caught. Somehow his gaze was watching you as the managers call out your name on the other side of the door, while they keep knocking.

“Miss Y/n? May we come in?” The manager asked finding the silence quite hard to ignore.

You juggle your own moans and your voice trying to separate them. You deeply breathe out and your voice is very muffled and strained by your lacking sinful thoughts of how good Taeyong’s mouth on your wet soaking pussy is. “N-no! Me and Taeyong are doing something— v-very important right now…!”

The managers stood there quiet reacting to your response. Maybe they should leave you two alone to discuss your work process?

The snapping motion of your stomach finally lets go and your pussy juice spews down from your aching wet hole into Taeyong’s mouth who didn’t waste a single drop. He darkly muffled. “That’s it… such a good girl…” he whispers keenly against your folds and you shudder at how hot he absolutely sounds. It’s so difficult to not be moaning out his name; heck you’d chant it not moan it loudly. You’d be chanting it as if it was a holy hymn meant to be sang to the world how good he ate you out.

You whimper. “G-gosh I can’t do this anymore Tae…” You say as your fingers fiddle in his hair and he murmurs softly kissing your overstimulated pussy humming. “Just a little bit more hm?”

You can’t say no when he’s so persuasive with the way his voice has his power over you. Taeyong knew you cannot reject him when he’s having so much fun controlling you right now.

“Miss Y/n but the coffee is getting cold? Will you and Taeyong be okay with that?” The managers come back asking as if they were worried more about the coffee meanwhile Taeyong was busy trying to destroy you from inside and out.

He’s loving this fucked out version of you so much, it’s impossible not to fall in love with you.

You wanted to tell the managers to already go away and do something with their life than to disrupt your time together, but then again, deep inside the idea of getting caught makes this even more thrill seeking to you in your opinion.

You muffle your groans out. “T-that’s fine— leave the coffee outside the door…!”

Taeyong smirks as he finally sees you getting closer to your second orgasm and this time you didn’t bother to hold back you simply let it run over you taking your first hand pushing it down to his head grinding his face on it. He loves it when you start to fidget with yourself and force yourself on his face — you love face fucking him when your orgasm was reaching its peak washing you both down with your juices spilling down your thighs and on the desk now. Your moans was incredibly strong that Taeyong had to reach up putting his hand on your mouth covered by your own lubricant from your orgasm, so your moans don’t come out.

Your eyes roll back slightly as you feel your orgasm washing away and soon Taeyong let’s your mouth become free from his mouth as he deeply kisses you. You feel your stomach panting in and out.

He whispers leaning down. “I like the name by the way.”

You raise your eyes up at him dazed and confused. “What name?”

He smirks. “Shalala.” Taeyong’s eyes never leave yours because he finds them to be the prettiest little orbs of life he ever dreamed to see. “I like it, Y/n.” You couldn’t help but smile in response, overwhelmed with pride and joy to know he likes it.

“I am glad…”

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@onyourhyuck please refer from translating and copyrighting my work thank youu! Reblog this fic and follow me for more updates it helps a girl out. <3

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whiteraven90 · 5 months ago

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hello, I hope you're having a good day <33 I saw your recent post on my dash and I was STUNNED at the animated scene! It's insane to me I get to see your characters animated. Feeling blessed to be alive to see it, I am not exaggerating. You know, one of these times where you wake up and things are a little bumpy in your life but there's one thing that shines brightly you didn't know it could give you so much excitement? Yeah, that kind of thing ((:

I took my time for the past hour to reminisce over your blog again. It is one of the places I really love scrolling through and reading your writing. I had a question, if you don't mind me. The way you have improved is truly admirable. I know this might not be an easy ask to say "hey, how did you learn how to paint", so I'll ask this instead: I don't know how long you've been working full-time in art, but when do you make time for studies / drawing for fun? If it's not too much to respond to, how do *you* study? I remembered your posts with your redlines and wanted to ask how do you go about those, or if you switch your routines based on your needs (sketches vs speed painting backgrounds etc). The notes there were very interesting, seeing the mental exercise.

Pretty sure you have a fKTON of stuff on your plate, so please don't feel obligated to respond quickly or even at all. Thank you in advance for taking the time to read my message and for all the time you take to respond in general. Love reading your responses <3

Take care, ok? <3

I'm glad the animation made you feel better! I'll put the answer under the Keep Reading thingy.

I'm not entirely sure... I think I don't study as much as I should/could. I mostly learn as I go. Standalone studies are helpful, I'm just drawn to doing things that are more fun/satisfying to me or things that actively progress my creative goals. Imperfect illustrations for my stories, and incomplete research for worldbuilding! Many people learn faster than I, and those people do a lot more studies than I, but I have no info on whether they have more fun than I. Dopamine is rocket fuel, so it's important. :)

I'm always on the lookout for reference pictures, but I study almost only when I have a practical goal in mind, I guess. Studying is part of my job too, I think? As an indie concept artist I'm supposed to build a hoard of references and pull several new/sensible things out of them, and I think part of this process is understanding the material, and revisiting even what I already know. Illustration is similar. If I'm commissioned to draw an anthro alligator, it's time to study gators. It's not separate from work.

I mean, straightforward version: I wake up at 03:30, make coffee, and start working for myself until the paying work starts, lol. Brain is fresh before noon, and tired late in the evening just like everyone else's. It also helps that the city more or less shuts up at 4am.

The studies with the redlines... I do them when I fancy drawing characters or creatures but feel out of shape. I can get discouraged, feel like I forgot how to draw. I sketch if I plan to sketch, and paint if I plan to paint or want to study colors Drawing live models helps. Studying videos of people and things in motion. Hopping down rabbit holes about how/why things work (e.g. flintlock, Davy lamp, mansard roof). Drawing from refs. Hoarding refs. Trying different mediums (e.g. charcoal, 3D, etching). Small screenshot of one of my ref boards for the animation; I'd say I studied it a lot. How clothes move, what are good clothes, how do good clothes move, lion/tiger + human + eagle anatomy (from specific angles during specific motions if/when possible), how to dive roll, proper sprinting form, how to survive falling from a great height, spearfighting, pole vaulting, poledancing, lighting, colors, environment, kicked-up sand in motion, spear types, emu/cassowary/griffon vulture feet, etc. I didn't draw studies, unless you count the animation itself (I would).

#whiteraventxt #studying #hope it doesnt read like i enjoy sniffing my own farts #Griffin's knees probably got blown when he fell btw

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maythedreadwolftakeyou · 5 months ago

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Hiii, do you have any tips for drafting out embroidery patterns? I've got one in mind, but drafting it out and color picking is so nerve-wracking!!

[Hi!!!! this got kinda really long so I'm gonna crop it under a read more. And I honestly don't have any real training/instruction in fiber arts so this is just how I do things, and probably others do them very differently!]

Haha so my fandom embroideries are VERY different from my non-fandom personal pieces in this respect. For non-fandom things i just kind of throw myself in like WAHOO FREEFORM LETS GO and go for a kind of messy colorful approach that ends up as things like this:

Versus my fandom stuff is way more structured and designed to fill space, be very precise, etc. So for those I do go in with a digital mock up of the design I make in photoshop, that I then color in, and then as my last step translate to thread colors.

For my Dragon Age series. this has been because I'm specifically trying to mimic the stained-glass style of art you see in parts of the game like the dialogue wheels, some icons, windows, etc. The icons in particular were really easy to copy into embroidery because they already come in handy circles:

This is mostly because I have desperately wanted to pick up stained glass work as a hobby for like 6 years now. As in once every 3-6 months I put everything I'd need to start doing it into an online shopping cart and look at the price total and then sadly close the window because I just don't actually have any space I could do it in (I live in a 2bed apartment so i have no garage or yard or anywhere it wouldn't make everything else a mess or be a hazard). The day after one of those events I impulse bought and completed a floral embroidery kit from the craft store and kinda was like... ok, well, I did this once how hard can it be to use this medium to mimic the hobby I wish I could be doing? Plus, it's only like 60 cents per color! I can afford that! So I took the first design I wanted to do, the romance icon, and basically redrew it sloppily in photoshop, then freehand-copied the design onto fabric and stitched it the next day:

I learned a lot from this piece and changed my approach a little. Here you can see I tried shading in the parallel direction to my thread, which looked messy and added texture, so now I shade horizontally to my thread direction instead.

But it gave me a basic approach for turning the Tarot cards or DA Keep tiles (or any other art!) into embroidery patterns, which I couldn't copy as directly into this really smooth stained-glass style. There's a basic process I follow when doing these conversions that generally follows the same order, which I'll go through below.

STEP 1: SHAPES

The first thing I do is pick the shape of my display frame which is usually a circle, but could be an oval or rectangle too, since I hang the finished pieces on my wall to have nice way to show them off. I like to fill the whole space so knowing the size and shape of what I want the finished project to look like is a good goal for me. Since I am doing fandom pieces I want to be recognizable, I do stick pretty close to the "original" character design/art, but you can absolutely change as much as you want and freehand draw your own interpretation instead. If you're doing original art just substitute the below composition notes with "sketch out roughly what you want it to look like". I personally do my pattern drafting digitally as I find it easier, but you can do this part by hand too.

First, I keep the reference image I'm working off of open next to me while I work, and draw in the shape of my frame (here, a circle). If I'm adding in the little border to be fancy, I add a second inner circle. I keep these as their own top layer so I always know I'm working within the final "frame" and don't spend time designing any section that will fall outside it. Then I will take copies of the reference image and knock the layers down to 25-50% opacity, and start moving them around underneath the 'frame' layer until I like the way their positioning looks as a composition. Sometimes elements of a card I want to include don't all fit in, so I'll chop the section out and add an additional layer to throw in (like the background circle things in the Hermit design below). Or I'll just freehand things like adding much bigger diamonds behind Solas in my Hierophant design because I did NOT want to do 1000 tiny ones. Then once I'm satisfied with the general composition, I'll use the plain ol circular brush tool to trace out the major shapes of each element. I try to keep in mind that I can't go too small, and curvy lines are more difficult to fill in than straight ones. I usually do a rough messy version first, make it mostly transparent, and then a cleaner and more precise one over that.

(you can see parts of the rough one on the left and the fully 'cleaned up' on the right for the Hierophant design)

Now: depending on what you are doing next with the pattern, this might be where you stop and start coloring. If you are planning to freehand your design or just trace it onto fabric (or even print it onto fabric here), there's no need to do more than this kind of lineart! However, if you are working digitally and want to create a scalable vector so you can print it at different sizes, you can use the pen tool in photoshop to trace your design and make a "work path" of the lineart. However, another note: THIS PART IS VERY FRUSTRATING AND TEDIOUS BECAUSE THE PEN TOOL WAS CREATED BY THE DEVIL TO TORMENT US. It is so so so easy to accidentally delete a line or even the whole path and not notice later on. Ask me how I know 😭 Anyway I'm not going to include a pen tool tutorial because I don't even know how to use it well and have to google or watch videos every other time I try to use it. But if you can muddle through it gets you some really clean lines that eventually look like this:

With the work path selected, you can select the brush tool/size/color and use the "stroke path" option to create lineart of the vector. Then you can save this as a transparent png file for use at different sizes and for printing and it looks so nice and clean! one of the big benefits to this is that you get really fine lines that are easier to be precise with stitching on. This is extra perfect if you are printing the design directly onto your fabric (which you can do with an at-home inkjet printer for designs under 8inches wide, as long as you stick a piece of stabilizer on the back of your fabric and cut it down to printer sheet size--this is what I do and can make another post about that process if people want haha), or if you are printing onto transfer paper like you can buy at craft stores.

This is where I end the lineart for my designs. After I have this, I move on to the next phase, which is...

STEP 2: COLOR

For interpreting my designs into thread, I start by thinking of it as flat colors first. You can't "shade" as easily with threads as you can with things like paint or brushes in digital art (though you can A Little, which I will get into), so to start color planning I pick the "main" color each section will be in the piece.

For the existing icons this was simple--I kept the same sections as the original designs, so for each I just color picked or eyeballed the color in photoshop and colored it in (but you could do this on paper with pencils, markers, whatever as well--they don't need to match your threads exactly and usually won't, it's just to give you an easy reference to follow as you go). For the tarot cards which were more complicated in coloration, I just did my best and went with what looked good next to each other, even if it was a little off the original art. It will be off more later anyway when you have to pick threads so don't stress it too much honestly. I will often make layers with different color options and turn them on/off for direct comparison to try to determine what I think looks best as well, like below where I was debating between more blue/desaturated for the background or brighter colors.

I do wanna note I have regrets about the color selection, shapes, or shading in EVERY SINGLE ONE of my finished pieces. But no one else ever comments or probably even notices! One aspect of this hobby is just learning to be satisfied with what you've made and using what you learned to get closer to your preferences next time. I'm only going back and redoing some of my designs' colors because I want to make it easier for others to choose on the patterns I sell, more than I care for just for myself. Also since I'm doing this lineart/stained glass looking approach where I go over the distinct shapes with black thread at the end, it means I get these clear delineations between sections you might not necessarily have in your own pieces, and that's ok.

Ok right. Now while shading/coloring in detail is hard with thread, you CAN make whats essentially dithered gradients. "Dithering" in the concept of art means using 2 (or more) colors to give the impression of a third color, or to gently scale between the existing binary rather than a hard line. Think of it like blocky pixel art or gameboy game images. If you're doing needlepainting, you use really small stitches close together to get this effect, which translates to "smaller pixes"--if you look at the jellyfish in my first photos that's a very messy casual version of that. If you want a better example, I recommend looking at @ammocharis 's pieces like these in her pinned post, which are truly amazing! I simply do not have the patience myself 😂 For my stained glass style, I work only in very long straight stitches, so I can only shade in one direction and have to be a little more precise with it.

So for shading, I think about in each section which direction my threads might go. Then perpendicular to that direction I pick which side will be the light one and which the darker one. Sometimes I color this in on my pattern mockup, but sometimes I don't! Or I'll only do it for certain sections to make sure I don't forget. Like for my Tower design I only colored it as flats, and waited until I selected threads to decide how the shading would go. I am currently working on a smaller, simplified version of my Hierophant design and I did add shading digitally for that one just for fun. But it's not as important as having the flat color version you can use to quick-reference how you want your design to go while you're stitching. You might also notice I don't actually color my gold--I just throw in a stock image of gold foil for that layer so I can't confuse it with any of my yellow thread sections.

Here's a close up where you can kind of see what I mean by the "dithered" effect between colors--some are more obvious (like the red on the far left or middle orange) and others pretty subtle (dark grey to dark red on the wolf face):

Now, while I use single layers of satin stitches for this, and just alternate thread colors increasing/decreasing as I go, you can accomplish the same thing with short overlapping stitches like with needlepainting, or with clusters of french knots, or whatever else. But in GENERAL you are going to be able to trick people into seeing gradients out of dithering best when you are using the same type of stitch for that whole area. So if I was using multiple stitch types like having french knots, daisy chains, ladder stitching or whatever else for some sections, I would keep those to contrasting areas/colors. A fantastic example of using different layered types of stitching to create more intricate color/texture in an embroidery would be these incredible tarot card depictions by @hattedhedgehog, which I like even better than my own embroideries. Here's his take on the Tower card as well for comparison to mine (I'm so in love with it!!!).

But anyway, at this phase, your design is actually still digital--the above is just to explain how it translates later in the process. The next step is...

STEP 3: THREAD SELECTION

I will admit here I am not great at this part. I am constantly second guessing my thread colors, and can spend over an entire hour in the thread aisle at the craft store agonizing over choices. Really, I think this is just one of those things that takes practice and you get better at it over time. What I have had the best luck with is actually printing out a reference photo of my design/the original artwork and taking it with me. If you already have threads you can do this part at home too, but DMC alone has over 500 colors and I definitely don't even own half that so I like to torture myself by looking at them all together on the thread racks. Plus Anchor and Artiste and whatever other brands there are out there. One approach is to just sit there and pick out what you want for each section and line it all up together on top of your printout. Or in the case of my Tower I laid a bunch of options out on top of my template in the hoop to guess how they'd look in the frame.

For me since I am also doing this dither shading thing, I also need 2-3 colors per sections depending on its size. Sometimes it's easy and the threads have a color just a little darker or lighter right next to them in the numerical lineup! Other times, there is no good match, or it looks too far away to shade nicely, or I want one to be a warmer or cooler tone than the other... which means a lot of standing and fretting to myself over it. I actually take a lot of photos at this stage because it can be easier to see how they will look in the end from a photo than in person to me? Idk why. Plus then after they get scrambled in my bag I remember wtf order I meant for them to go in later. But as long as you're not preventing other customers from shopping themselves, you can spend as long as you want staring at thread in the embroidery aisle and they won't kick you out unless it's closing time, so take your time.

Now, IN THEORY, you can sort of combine steps 2 and 3 by color-selecting from your threads and using that to color in the design. However I have tried this and it led to mixed success because the photoshop eyedropper brush simply isn't actually that exact (in my experience, it desaturates compared to what we actually see). And because then you have to have the threads on hand while you're coloring... which means you might buy ones you don't end up using if you don't like them. So I prefer to just use this as a refinement step where I pick threads based on the design colors, then will re-color the design a second time to match those threads more closely to be sure I like the effect.

I've even used this as a tool when I needed to adjust my color choices mid-project, by digitally coloring over over my WIP:

Or here's a design (but I haven't posted the finished piece yet bc it's a gift so shhh) I made with certain color tones initially, but after buying thread I re-did the color mockup to be more vibrant, because I liked those threads better in the store:

Once you have your thread, you can make yourself a little reference chart with the colors you intend noted on the sections you want them, like below:

(note: i didn't end up sticking to these colors because I ended up dying my own thread for several sections. And then forgot I made this entirely and picked new ones because I put the project down for a year between design and stitching. Sigh).

Or for my Solas pattern I did this in a really detailed way, which i am sorry but i have redacted because... i have it for sale now and don't wanna just give that away haha. But if you buy the pattern from my shop this is one of the files you'd get with it, for ease of reference. I do also include a text-only list of them as well.

Now I don't go to this much trouble for all my designs, just the ones I put up for sale (or plan to). You can also just make a text list of your color plans if you want. Though for fun I also have been using my scrap thread to make these little "color palette" keyrings for my finished pieces, so if I ever remake them or update their patterns I will know what the original colors were, plus I can compare what i used to other threads if I wanna change part of the design up. This step is absolutely not necessary and I'm just doing it because I'm selling the patterns now, but they are kinda fun to look at.

And don't forget.. if you start a section in a certain color and decide you don't like it, you can just cut the threads and pull them out! I did that with my original hierophant piece actually. I had an entirely different color for one row of diamonds i thought just clashed way too much with the others, so I used photoshop to paint over it with some alternate options until I found one I liked better. Then I cut away all the old threads and put in the new color. It can be a little harder to fill a piece the second time since the fabric will have stretched out a little, but as long as you're using a good stabilizer it usually doesn't move too much.

You can also just make test swatches on spare fabric to test before you add them to your real piece. I wish I'd done this for some color transitions that didn't end up looking the way I wanted, but I am simply too lazy most of the time. My exception is usually for metallic, satin, or sparkly threads, because I want to know how they feel while embroidering. But if you're really worried about a certain color or shade it's a good thing to remember you can just do.

SO yep, that's my general process for drafting patterns. I start with the shapes/design, then do my flat color version, then I pick my threads. Makes it sound easy and short when phrased like that :) But I can honestly spend 8-10 hours just on making the lineart and coloring it in. If I was better at art, probably this would be less, but I'm working with what I've got (not much) 😂 I think all aspects of this are also something that gets easier over time, but it will probably never look as bad as you worry when you start out. I think all my pieces look awkward and rough right up until I do the finishing steps and move them to the display frame sometimes.

I hope this was helpful and answered your questions!! Feel free to post/share your WIPs to ask for feedback or advice ever too :) I've only ever had people in the embroidery community on tumblr be encouraging and helpful to me, and I'm happy to answer any questions myself when I can or if parts of this were confusing

#ramblings #my stuff #my embroidery #embroidery #dragon age embroidery #calicostorms #oh god tumblr changed the alignment of all my images so theyre all huge now great #WELL I keep tryign to rearrage them to be on the same line and it is NOT working so. thats how they will look i geuss #this is gonna annoy me all night... thats what i get for expectign a Functional Website though #embroidery chatter

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orchid-prince · 2 months ago

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My 1st Year of Drawing through Fanart

I really started in July, so it’s not a full year, but taking a look back at where I started in 2024 is pretty cool! Checking for improvement, noticing where I was struggling. I can even see what skill I was trying to pick up at the time based on the jump in the skills quality/the lack of focus on others. So before the year ends here is:

✨My First Year Trying to do Art✨ through the fanart I’ve made! Enjoy!! <3

Would you believe it took me 3 tries to get freaking BILL CYPHER right ?!? This is V2 actually but it’s a good indicator of where I was starting.

This was the first day I decided drawing was fun for me. I woke up, and immediately picked up my pencil to spend all morning drawing, without truly realizing it. Keep in mind I didn’t even have a pencil to draw with before this session, the other work in this notebook are, like, all pen.

🎀My baby spinel!!!🎀 I adore her🥰

Is the art good, not really, but you can tell who she is and at this point that’s kinda my only goal. If it looks like ‘em it’s close enough for me.

Side note: This is the piece that instilled the fear I will mess up any nice sketch by coloring it, a fear I still have to this day.

She may look decent here but in my sketchbook she’s ruined foreverrrr XD

Ok…maybe there’s a pattern with the kinda characters I’m compelled to draw.

Aaaanyway this is where I started focusing on hair more, the spikey look was my thing in the beginning while I was still trying to figure out how hair works. Lowkey I’m still trying to figure it out.

Also WHY DID I DRAW THE EAR LIKE THAT?!? What was I even going for 💀

Fun fact: Daria is my benchmark for progress! She’s been my favorite character since I was a teenager & she’s made of pretty simple shapes. I imagine when I get more confident I’ll take more liberties with how I draw her, like Jane, instead of trying to make it a one to one mimick.

Also bonus Sir Integra Hellsing, she was my first attempt to an actual anime style especially in the hair. And similarly to jinx you can tell this was more focused on learning on drawing her hair rather than her face. This was a trend for a few weeks which did come back to bite me in the ass with this next piece

Ya know what I didn’t see a theme with the characters I draw before I started making this post, and now I definitely do.

But OH you can SEE my struggle with her on the page🤦🏾‍♀️! This genuinely took me 2 days to do because her face frustrated me so much I rage quit till the next night.

After this I went back to practicing eyes and finally trying finding out how to draw mouths and lips in different ways and positions to avoid this problem (Didn’t work, I still often refuse to draw a face if the hair/body is pretty)

And to top it off I inked it & accidentally made her lids look like eyebrows, so now I have a fear of inking 🙄 Thanks Catra >.>

Now THIS is where I actually started staring at my hands for a good 30 seconds after drawing like “MY HANDS MANAGED TO MAKE THIS??” Because this was only 6 DAYS after I rage quit on Catra. Yet I can make this?!!? What?!?

This was genuinely just supposed to be a doodle to practice using his big ol’ grin to learn how mouths work cuz he’s all mouth and teeth. But lowkey, still have no idea how this and the next one happened. It was a weirdly good art-day for me but I had never been more proud. And shockingly I’m still really happy with how these came out, usually I get pretty ‘Meh’ on my favorites after a while. Maybe even kinda nitpicky, but these two feel like my magnum opus for the year.

^^Look at this!! If I could inject this I would! Angel Dust with Pinchers is the BEST version. I will not take criticism.

This, similar to Fizz, was mostly for his eyes and to try to get the flow of hair and fluff down.

By this point I discovered if I find which of my favorite character has a design quality that is unique that correlates to the skill, I can trick my brain into picking up the skill through hyperfixations and sheer force of will.

Aaand welcome to Valentine fails to figure out expressions and head positions, ;-; someone give me back my 3/4 front facing view cuz obviously I can’t do anything else.

This was the most low effort fanart but Marcy became a pretty easy character to draw by this point so I attempted a spooky vibe to try something new. Unfortunately they all just look traumatized, yet that kinda works for her character.

This is the point I started having a little problem, towards the end of October and beginning of November I screwed up.

I usually tried to draw every day if not every 2-4 days. Right before this I skipped over a week, for some reason tho that made me feel like my quality has begun slipping. Like if I don’t try to put lines to the page every day even if I’m just doing circles and not drawing anything productive I’m ginna lose all my progress and go back to square one. This Anya (from the game Mouthwash) is from my 4 inch doodle book I got to combat this problem.

While I’m not particularly proud of this one I will say if July Me saw this I think she’d be really proud and actually love it. So I chose to as well. Besides I adore that sweetheart Anya in any form she takes!

And last but never least: KEN TAKAKURA AKA OKARUN!!!

This is by far my favorite of my most recent drawings. Playing loosely with his shapes was pretty freeing, since I have a very stagnant idea of lines and forms, especially with hair, so getting to do Okarun was fun. His hair and collar felt very ‘scribbly’ to me which was actually fun because I wasn’t so focused on exact shapes how I usually am.

It’s not perfect (like those lopsided ears) and it’s not a direct mimick like Fizzarolli but I still really really like it.

If you go back and compare this one to even my first three I feel like I’ve gotten so much better in the last 6 months. It only makes me wanna keep trying!

***************

If you read all this, firstly thank you!!

Also keep drawing, draw every day you can. Or pick up the pencil right now and start, idc if you think it’s “bad” idc if you make 100 “bad drawings”. Art is first and foremost about having fun, feeling good while creating. Not just to get good at it, which ,not gonna lie, was my focus in the beginning. But what’s actually FEELS good in the moment is to finish up a picture and be like “WHOA I MADE that! It didn’t exist before, I made it exist!” Everyone deserves that feeling.

So pick up the pencil and get to it!

The world deserves to see what you can create <3

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fantasy-anatomy-analyst · 7 months ago

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Hi, I'm wondering what your take on combining animal features together in a cohesive way would be? Especially in the case of animals that look vastly different from each other or aren't even in the same sort of groups (ie say, cephalopods with mammals). I'm trying to achieve the "looks like one singular animal" type of thing that has been mentioned in your centaur posts, but I keep ending up with creatures that look like they've been frankenstein-ed together.

I answered a similar question before

I need to make a full tutorial on this as well i think, but the tldr is this:

pick your creatures

identify their visual similarities and differences

identify the most iconic parts of each creature that you want to preserve in the final design

smush em together like clay and redraw them as many times as it takes for things to look more cohesive (sorry)

example:

(image description: two collages of animal photos; a pig, porcupine, and pronghorn antelope. the second image includes notes pointing out similar features between them and a few distinct features for each. hooves for the pig and pronghorn, round bodies for the pig and porcupine, and sharp defenses for the porcupine and pronghorn. the distinct features for each are the snout of the pig, the quills and orange teeth of the porcupine, and the horns and coloration of the pronghorn. end description.)

(image description: colored simple drawing of a new fantasy animal combining the features of the pig, porcupine, and pronghorn. it looks like a wild boar covered in large quills, with orange tusks, and the coloration and horns of a pronghorn. end description.)

sometimes in the process, you find that one of the creatures you picked just has a stronger effect on the design than the others, and that's fine! with more draft sketches, I would probably end up changing the shape of these horns to be more unique, maybe give it shorter legs and lean into the porcupine's arboreal nature. or I could go the other way and try to lean more into the pronghorn body shape, make this a running animal. it all depends on the role i want it to have in whatever setting i'm designing it for, and which features will best serve that role.

I also used very random animals here, but for an actual project i would plan it out more and have an end goal in mind. why is this pig-like creature covered in sharp quills? why does it have quills, horns, and also tusks? what's its diet and habitat? etc etc. you need to not only work with the visual design, but also the world design. it's a living thing in your setting, so it needs to fill a niche. your final design may abandon many distinct features from your original creature inspirations in favor of making a more unique creature that suits your setting! you have to be flexible with it and redo it a few times before you find the sweet spot.

#combining creatures

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ranticore · 1 day ago

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General art question but what's your process when sketching? How many references (poses, vibes etc) do you usually use for simpler, non-colored pieces like the werewolf bowman sketch? How do you make the moves look so natural and fluid???

Asking bc lately i havent been able to move past 3D models for art bases and I need some advice on how to do more fluid art lol

aaah i wish i could show the sketch for that one but i didn't save the layers lol. that one had no reference i just kinda scribbled until it was in the shape i had in mind and then i lined it. took me about 1 hour start to finish

the only thing i had as a guide was the line of action (still visible). to make something look like it's moving i cheat and use hair or cloth for kinetic elements, what i wanted for that pic was for the tension and strain to show in the muscles of his weight-bearing leg, and for that tension to follow through to the head showing the physical effort it takes to make a movement like that, and the exaggerated extension of the neck to add a kind of 'squash and stretch' quality as if it was an animation. but the weight-bearing leg didn't come out satisfactory to me so i think the hair carries the sense of movement or fluidity.

anyway all that is to say that i was trying to show the movement more than a perfect anatomical representation which is what it might look like if i very closely referenced or traced a picture of a leaping dog. i actually have a 3D model of his face which i made to help with angles but i ended up not using it much because even if the results were fully accurate and consistent, it somehow ended up looking kinda stiff and less animated. the end goal is to have a strong illustration even if the anatomy is fudged a little

#hope that makes sense... like in the illustration i can convey that he is leaping to snap at something and that's the purpose of it #the anatomy is off to facilitate the illustration #now i have no formal art education so any time i say anything about this i feel like i'm reinventing the wheel and everyone who knows #anything about illustration already has a single word that describes this concept. alas.

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copwef · 7 months ago

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With the book of bill's recently coming out I figured I'd do a sketch of a au I thought of a few years back. I couldn't do anything with it because I was too young to use social Media. But recently have gotten back into gravity Falls so I figured why not.

The Idea behind the au was that after Stan defeated Bill and shattered him. He pled to the axolotl to save him and reincarnate him into another form. The axolotl would refuse because he didn't trust Bill could change. However he sensed some tiny scraps of good in bill.

So he allowed bill to continue fragmenting. He saved the fragments that had any good in them and allowed those pieces of bill to reincarnate into different people in different universes. While letting the rest of him fragment and die.

However as a last ditch effort to survive. The remaining parts of bill that were still fragmenting invaded the mind of a child. Intent on taking him over to save himself. However the plan wouldn't go as expected.

Bill was severely weakend. His physical form still in the statue contained most of his power. And scince he was fragmented that weakened him even more. So he wasn't powerful enough to take over the child's body.

However as the child grew up he would take on drawing as a hobby. He would frequently find himself drawing things quite similarly shaped to bill, or unrelated things that had some of his attributes. Since the child was too Young to remember weirdmageddon and the law prevented talking about it. He wouldn't think Much of it.

So bill's main goal. Is to figure out how to manipulate the child into freeing his physical body. Then travel the multiverse to recollect The fragments of him that re-incarnated too achieve his full power. Then restart weirdmageddon.

However a problem is he can only communicate with the child through his drawings.

(btw the drawing is how bill really looks. The child would draw him like he's uninjured. And the reason his hat is like that is because it was reincarnated, however the blue flames are still attacking his form as it was before he was fragmented. Resulting in them remaining and burning where his hat was)

The au is called. Cipher's salvation!

#gravity falls #gravity falls bill #gravity falls book #book of bill #bill cipher #the book of bill #gravity falls au #gravity falls art #gravity falls bill cipher

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thesinisterhappenings · 9 days ago

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Statement of Elaine Sketch, regarding a parasite. Recorded by ________________, in the Magnus Institute, London.

Statement begins.

“So I’m a scientist right? I work with chemicals, microscopes, the stuff you might see on TV. I mainly work with water samples and testing levels of different chemicals in them. Observing the organisms that live in different waters from different locations, comparing them. Really baseline, pretty simple stuff.

Well, I was checking out this water from Louisiana, in the states right? And it seemed pretty normal, general murkiness, normal organisms. But I see this new one, wiggling around in there. Nothing I'd seen before. So i call my buddy over, his name is-. Was, Dennis. Dennis Baker.

Anyways, he takes a look at it, points out it’s patterns. The way it moves, the shapes it’s forming. They’re unnatural, like it’s struggling. Panicked. I had never known that a parasite like that could struggle to live. Of course at the time we didn’t know it was a parasite, it could’ve been a worm, just another wriggling thing we forgot to label.

We don’t bring it up to our boss. We should’ve. Oh god we should’ve. We start testing it, like idiots. First transferring it to see what it does to a bug. Then to a mammal like one of the rats. Then, we upgraded. Seeing how it reacted to primates. And every time, it evolved more and more.

First it would worm under the skin. Burrowing into the blood stream and up into the nerve system. Wrapping itself around that cluster of nerves at the top of the spine. Then, it would multiply. I cant explain how. You know how as a kid, you were told if you cut a worm in half it would grow into two worms? It was like that. At first we thought it was killing itself. We were wrong.

One would stay in the nerves, and the other would find its way into the heart, wrapping around and controlling its very heartbeat. Then the first would split again. And it would find its way into the brain. Soon enough it had full control over the entire creature.

And then the body would rot. At a rapid pace. A horribly disgusting rapid pace. In a day it would be covered in blisters, then it would ooze. Pus and blood, everywhere. On everything. The organism would be dead but the body would. Not. Die. It couldn’t. The parasite did not allow it.

Soon we grew reckless in our hope for scientific discovery. Fame took over our mind, our goals. And eventually. It got to Dennis. And everything we knew would happen, happened. His body rotted. But he’s still alive.

He’s still down there if you need proof. Banging away at the glass, violent and hungry. I cannot look down there anymore, but send your people if you need evidence. I didn’t take pictures. I’m sorry, I just couldn’t do that to him. I’m sorry!”

… She ran out of the room. We sent people down there but whatever was raging, has disappeared. There’s no evidence of her claims except for a petri dish under a microscope with an organism, squirming for its life.

Statement ends.

#the sinister happenings #joe spooky #the magnus archives #sinister happenings #tim stoker #tma #the magnus protocol #timothy stoker #the magnus institute #jane freaky

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spaciebabie · 2 months ago

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any advice 4 when u want to keep drawing 2 improve but u cant get over perfectionism ? like when u just dont care how its gonna turn out, if its bad its bad yknow?

ahh yes lowkey ive struggled with this a lot. not as much now as in the past tho, and honestly its beecuz ive developed a more neutral view on myself/my art in general. its going to take time to get to this state of mind, so dont be too hard on yourself when you find yourself falling into bad habits.

advice under the cut (kind of long winded) ⬇️⬇️⬇️

the first thing ive done to overcome perfectionism is focus less on details and more about overall shape and form. when i sketch im trying to get roughly what i want, and i limit the strokes i do in certain parts of my sketch to like 1-3 depending on what im drawing (im ngl i also am very impatient and have created a workflow that makes it so i am able to start and finish pieces as fast as possible LOLOLOL. shrugs. i just like drawing fast).

a good example would be this thing i just drew:

in all of my sketches i tend to use as few strokes as possible and just get the basic idea down. good for not overly focusing on teeny tiny details and worrying about them later (i also use the same technique for lineart, but just end up connecting the lines. thats another tip i have, if you like your sketches more than your fully lined pieces, just line the same way you sketch! or you could also use your sketch as your lineart :P)

another tip i have is to draw from references, and once again, focus mostly on shape/form/the big picture of your subject before going into details (do you know how many planes there are on the human face....i still dont know howta draw faces properly but im not mad at myself anymore about it, i just open up a reference and try to learn). i also recommend having a drawing session where the goal is to draw awfully. draw something you want to draw, but that you're not sure if you'll draw it right, and draw it. dont try to correct it, acknowledge that what you made isnt perfect, and then draw something else. you're learning! of course its not gonna be perfect. but inevitably, you're going to get frustrated. just remember if its something you really want to go back to, you will be able to revisit it in the future. feel your anger and frustration, but do your best to not direct it inward.

small side tangent about shading- I AM SO SHIT AT SHADING SKFHSAFDJHS. people dont tend to notice (surprising), since ig my shading style is considered "beautiful" or something, but if you looked at it on a technical level, there are mistakes everywhere. i havent really tried to improve it. i dont really care most of the time b/c i just like shading for fun. and especially when im shading my sketches, i already have it in my mind that its not supposed to be perfect. its a sketch. this is where im supposed to make all of my mistakes. once i start making my way to the final product is when i start worrying more about if i did the lighting correctly (even then ik im not good at it im not trying to be a god im just trying to draw things that make me happy).

additionally, i really rec u dont try and fudge a sketch until its better if you're deep in a Perfectionist moment. keep the old sketch and start over on a new sketch taking bits and pieces you liked from the original, and improving on those that you dont (shitty thumbnails are also good if you have a vague idea in mind but need ta figure out howta place subjects in your scene). honestly drawing the same thing/idea over and over gets me a better understanding of my subject each time, so naturally each iteration looks better. it doesnt take me that long to sketch tho, so if sketching takes you forever (sometimes if sketching takes you forever its b/c you're a perfectionist skjfskdjf) just think about how much time you're willing to spend on something. remember☝️ its okay to give up/take a break on something and try again later. sometimes you just needta stop looking at your art and like. look at a tree or something lmfao.

i will also say that im not looking to go into a career in art, im more of a hobbyist. ik school environments dont exactly.....help with perfectionism lol. there are certain expectations put on people who go into the art field that are inescapable. if this is the case for you, i still think what ive discussed before can help you, but i also think that you may need to lean more on the mental tips i have also provided below.

alright! mental health tips in regard to art:

so, i have c-ptsd, and with that comes a lot of self image issues that ive had to work on. my feelings about myself extended to the way i felt about my art. it was shit, it was awful, i cant draw like this other person can so why bother, if its not perfect i shouldnt draw at all, etc. and honestly, something thats helped is affirmations. my affirmations are c-ptsd related, but ive noticed a shift in the way i view myself, and by extent, my art since ive started repeating them to myself daily. and honestly, i think a requirement of overcoming perfectionism is telling yourself that your art doesnt hafta be perfect, A LOT. LOL. LIKE YOU ACTUALLY HAFTA ACTIVELY TELL YOURSELF YOU'RE NOT AWFUL LMAOOOO. its funny, we dont think much about how we naturally are self critical about ourselves, and we dont realize that we are basically repeating negative affirmations about ourselves over and over and thats why we're not improving (mentally).

even when you're not drawing, i think it would benefit some people to have some kind of notification on their phone to remind them to tell themselves that their art doesnt hafta be perfect daily/however often you feel you might need it. and then with that affirmation, practice Shitty Drawing. one of the best tips ive ever gotten for this was from one of my friends monnie. get out your sketchbook or some printer paper, take out a shitty pen, and DRAW. and then any mistakes you make are permanent and you cant just endlessly try and fix them. it forces you ta sit with this uncomfortable feeling that something you made isnt perfect. eventually your brain will realize that when your art isnt perfect, you can still draw and you're ALLOWED to continue to draw even if what you make isnt spectacular. if you dont want to repeat an affirmation daily, try to remember to at least repeat it before you sit down to draw. something along the lines of "my art doesnt hafta be perfect in order for me to want to draw. im allowed to draw even if its not perfect" or something else. it depends on what you most struggle with in regards to your perfectionism. im ngl its probably going to feel cringe at first, but i promise you, it really works if you put it into practice longterm.

shoot for neutrality instead of positivity first. let me tell you thats where i am now and its so much less exhausting drawing lmfaooo. i make something that looks like shit and im just like. i dont fucking careee i dont give a fuccckkkkk

those are my tips :] i hope this was helpful!

#spacie spoinks #art tips #kind of?#art advice #i would have added more art but i dont have my art saved on this device KSHFSKJDFH #i copy and pasted my art above from my tumblr post 💀💀💀💀💀💀#anyway #have a great day anon!!

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marinersubmariner · 6 days ago

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Empress Rey art notes/process post

I'm not usually a fan of extremely feminine Rey fashions, mainly due to personal preference and because it doesn't fit with how I view her character. Even when re-envisioning something for dark Rey—which could conceivably be more out of character—there isn't a lot that really works for me. But I was struck by some inspiration and felt the urge to try putting her in something glamorous in a way that is intentionally counter to what I think of as her more authentic presentation.

I admittedly never hated her white outfit as much as a lot of people—I did find it to be a nice refinement of her previous outfits—but I also definitely agree with the criticism that the pure white is symbolically a regression for her character, cloying and infantilizing and impractical. (yeah the sand gremlin always covered in grease, blood, sweat, and dirt is gonna dress in white. yeah. great.) So as with many things in TROS I think it's more interesting to deliberately play up the wrongness of it. Warping the white into something too white, a false signaling of purity that tips over the edge into uncanny. A wolf in sheep's clothing. (classic Palpatine)

As far as direct inspiration, the Praetorian guards have always reminded me of Eiko Ishioka's costume designs, and ever since that realization it's been stuck in my mind that her style is something that would have been really cool and weird for Empress Rey. I hadn't thought beyond that into visualizing anything, until it hit me that rather than going typically dark I could reference something like vampire Lucy in Dracula (1992), all in white but obviously monstrous.

Specifically within Star Wars I find that concept of "darkness presented as light" most effective and haunting in Screecher's Reach with the Sith Mother. Light and salvation as horror; "going toward the light" as a metaphor for death; Kylo fighting so desperately against the pull to the light; searing, blinding brightness being just as maddening as impenetrable darkness.

Here are some examples of what I was pulling from:

1. Bram Stoker's Dracula 2. The Fall 3. The NeverEnding Story 4. Dune: Part Two 5. Screecher's Reach 6. Givenchy 7-8. Iris Van Herpen

I was trying to avoid being too reminiscent of anything Padme wore, but she covered so many different types of royal outfits and head adornments that there's not much way around it with this type of thing.

I didn't look much at real-life crowns (aside from material reference for sparkle/shininess rendering) because I didn't want to be derivative or appropriative of any particular cultural dress, but there's likely some inadvertent similarity simply because ornate headdresses already exist in so many forms. My goal was just to appeal to my own affinity for linear patterns and geometric shapes.

Sketches from trying to figure out a crown design. I wanted more stuff hanging in her face—I had envisioned chains or a veil because I like the mysteriousness of obscuring some features and the hostility of making it cumbersome for the wearer and inscrutable to the viewer, but since her eyes are kind of the only indicator of evilness here (and a subtle one at that) I couldn't bring myself to cover up too much. When I tried veils it looked too bridal, which I also didn't want, so I ultimately landed on the partial open veil/cowl.

The emblem in the tiara and hidden in the back of the headdress is the Sith Eternal insignia from TROS. And I did give her Sith eyes but may have gone too understated with it—I was trying to do it in a way that's more golden and less cartoonish than they typically look. (the bright yellow and red is. a lot. and changing iris colors is a tricky balance to strike because it can get tacky really quickly. uhhhh full offense @ live-action Ahsoka Hera and Ezra)

I got hung up on this for a long time because of the outfit rendering—I finished the portrait months ago and then got overwhelmed by the prospect of trying to refine the headdresses and clothing. Just getting the outlines shaped in a way I liked took a long time, and then I had no idea how to achieve the crystalline headdress or how to balance looser rendering with such an extensive amount of detail. I tried it with dashed vector lines, which gave a decent effect but was too uniform and busy, so I jumped off from that and redrew it by hand. It's still not really what I wanted—I had hoped for something sleeker and maybe more opalescent than just "idk diamonds or whatever"—but at least it kind of looks like it's made out of crystals.

I'm actually happiest with the clothing, what little of it is visible—I loooooove pleats (sharp lines! geometry! Issey Miyake!!) and wanted the fabric to appear translucent and somewhat iridescent and I'm pretty satisfied with how that ended up. Also a slight nod to The Locked Tomb's Lyctor cloaks. :) The Emperor's fists and gestures. :)

Once again I had higher aspirations to weirdness than what I actually achieved because my aesthetics tend toward simplistic and boring, and things that seem good in theory don't always work in practice, but anyway, that's the stuff that was going through my head. Not dark but beautiful and terrible as the dawn, etc.

One final fun thought I had: what if the headdress crystals are shattered bits of kyber screaming in agony? What if Rey Palpatine is completely out of her gourd

#my art #my constant need to overexplain myself

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aqua-the-smiter · 11 months ago

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✦•······················•✦•······················•✦୨୧✦•······················•✦•······················•✦ ℑ𝔯𝔬𝔫 ℌ𝔞𝔫𝔡𝔰 Ferrus Manus x female oc (Argena Seeva) Other parts in the reblogs Ferrus, in a bid to one up his pain-in-the-ass brother Fulgrim, takes up drawing. Gets some reference help from his long suffering friend and senechal, Argena. Part of my AU I have cleverly called the Primarch Wife AU. Happy endings, the boys get the help they need, Big E is a good dad and, most importantly, everybody gets a wife. Because big husband and small wife makes brain go brr

Sexual content/NSFW after the cut - Very lewd-but-not-lewd touching, Ferrus jacking off to his future wife while trying to get work done, idiots in love. @thevoidscreams @pringles-plaguehaus ✦•······················•✦•······················•✦୨୧✦•······················•✦•······················•✦

₊˚ ‿︵‿︵‿︵୨୧ · · ♡ · · ୨୧‿︵‿︵‿︵ ˚₊ “Gena?” Ferrus asked, sounding uncharacteristically nervous. “I have a…strange favor to ask of you.” Argena put down the loop of silver she’d been polishing and turned around on her stool to face him as she heard him out. Throne, he even looked uncomfortable, and she wondered what exactly he needed that he was looking so hot under the collar. Ferrus Manus was many things, but wavering was not one of them. Actually he was kind of cute like that. She mentally slapped herself almost as soon as the thought crossed her mind. HE. IS. YOUR. BOSS. She’d been with him for over a year and half at this point. It felt like it should have been longer. Falling into the role of his senechal had been so easy after a while. Especially after they’d started spending more time simply enjoying each other’s company. He was a surprisingly layered man once he opened up enough to show it. And, she heavily suspected, a lonely one too. So they’d gotten close more easily than she would have first thought. It even showed in the way he addressed her. Gena, a more tender nickname than her given. “Does it have anything to do with your ongoing attempts to one up your brother?” He rubbed the back of his neck. “It does, yes. Look, I can’t help it. Fulgrim has been driving me mad recently, so I want to pay him back in kind.” “I know, I know. And if you pull it off you’ll make him absolutely seethe.” “It” in question was Ferrus putting a serious effort into learning how to draw. He could already, but it was an entirely different kind. Technical drawings, machine blueprints, weapon schematics. Nothing really artistic, although it could be counted as a form of art in its own right if you asked her. Watching him work was hypnotic, the movement of the pencil or stylus in his metal hands impossibly graceful. Elegant even. But most people didn’t see it that way. Resident artsy fuck, Fulgrim, certainly didn’t. Constantly making little jabs and jokes at his best friend’s inability to produce anything else than purely practical drawings. Finally, Ferrus had enough and announced to her in private that he was going to produce a piece of actual art better than anything Fulgrim could do (and he wasn’t as good as everyone thought he was, including himself) out of pure brotherly spite. The early results were rough, but promising. Argena herself had quite a bit of skill, picked up from her goldsmithing hobby, and he’d come to her with practice sketches, rudimentary shapes and simple three dimensional objects. It took him a while, but he was definitely getting it. His talent for technical drawings was beginning to shine through with the clean linework. In short, it seemed he might actually do it. “That is the goal.” He said, just a little smug. “So what do you need me for, pray tell my lord?” She prompted. The Primarch seemed to steel himself for a moment. “Well…I feel I’m ready to move on to…organic materials now. I can only draw my own tools so much before I cease to learn any more from the exercise. I was going to ask if I could study you. Your anatomy, I mean.” And it already sounded like that would involve less clothes than she started with that day. “...Study my anatomy? How so? Moreover, why?”

“Feel up your body. Your muscles, skeletal structure, general build. How everything connects and moves together. I find that I learn best when I am up to the elbows in it so to speak, so being able to touch it would be the best thing. You are the only person I feel comfortable coming to with this. It is, ultimately, quite a petty thing I’m after. You have been very understanding of me. More than I thought would be possible.” Ferrus paused for a moment, wondering if what he had to say next was even a good idea before deciding he’d take that chance. “Also, you are objectively a very beautiful woman. Whatever someone’s personal tastes may be, nobody could look at you and deny it. And subjectively, I think you are a beautiful woman. For those reasons you’d make the best subject for what I’m trying to accomplish. If the goal of art is to create something pleasing to the eye, something that captures the beauty of the world and the enthusiasm of the creator in a still image, you would be a perfect basis. Not like the mess of colors and lines Fulgrim throws on his canvases.” He spoke so frankly. Ferrus was always a very no-nonsense type of person, but to have that direct, blunt nature used in such a glowing description of her was something else entirely. Because you knew for a fact when he said something, he meant it. It made her feel very warm inside. “And this is purely for research, right?” She asked tentatively. “Purely objective.” He swore. “And I won’t go any farther than you want or touch you anywhere you don’t want to be touched. I’ll fill in any gaps in my knowledge with an anatomy book. Just tell me where to stop, and I will.” Somehow a Primarch who’d grown up in the wilderness eating sand had a better concept of boundaries than many people. “Well...I trust you, so I suppose it wouldn’t hurt.” She said after a moment, rubbing her upper arm. “I’m willing. Let’s do it.” He gave her one of his rare smiles (that seemed to be becoming less rare nowadays come to think of it), genuinely grateful. It made her feel more at ease with the agreement. Who knows, it might even be fun. ₊˚ ‿︵‿︵‿︵୨୧ · · ♡ · · ୨୧‿︵‿︵‿︵ ˚₊

#warhammer 40k #warhammer #warhammer 40k x oc #primarch x oc #primarch x female oc #mating press march #ferrus manus #ferrus manus x oc #ferrus manus x female oc

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