#i simply thought of this and found it funny

[katsu2ji]

fool for you — m. fushiguro

a/n: i love writing megumi as a cheesy lovesick idiot fool because he IS a cheesy lovesick idiot fool. an oblivious one, at that.

megumi didn't even intend to make a joke. he was being completely serious, talking in that deadpan, monotone voice that everyone around him was all too familiar with. he was talking about gojo, of course—he'd done something stupid, yet again.

despite his intentions (or rather, lack thereof), you thought what he said was funny. he was surprised when he heard you laugh; it was a sound that made him turn his head to the source of the noise, his face a mixture of flustered and confused.

"what? what did i do?" he asked, his eyes wide. he looked over your facial features, committing them all to memory without him even consciously thinking about it. christ, you looked—

"no, it's nothing," you answered, smiling at the boy. "it's just the way you said that just now was funny. sorry, i hope you didn't think i was laughing at you."

he was silent for a few seconds before realizing you had spoken; he blinked, coming back to himself.

god, what was going on with him? he was fine two seconds ago, but now he couldn't even look you in the eye. his stomach was doing some odd thing; he felt like he was simultaneously going to throw up and some, strange, other feeling that he wasn't sure how to describe.

"oh—no, i didn't think you were laughing at me. i just..." he paused, looking for his train of thought, "i didn't think what i said was very funny but, um—"

he mentally cursed himself, feeling like an idiot. why the hell couldn't he speak? why couldn't he look at you?

this had been happening a lot recently—the stuttering over his words, being unable to make eye contact you at certain moments—and with the way it's making him act, he wasn't sure if this an avenue he wanted to keep going down.

he took a breath, feeling his cheeks get hot. he ignored the it as he finished his sentence, "i'm glad i was able to make you laugh, i guess?"

jesus, he probably looked like an moron.

later, as he closed his eyes for bed, he couldn't stop thinking about that exchange. never in his life had he felt like he'd made such a complete and utter fool of himself, but he couldn't figure out why it bothered him so much. and that bothered him even more.

he replayed your laugh in his head over and over, the sound turning over in his mind like a lullaby in a music box. he wasn't sure why the thought of your laughing, the look on your face as you did so, struck him as much as it did.

and that wasn't the first time that had happened when it came to you, either, he reminded himself; there had been other moments when you'd done something that stirred up mysterious feelings inside him, like that one time you grabbed his hand to pull him along somewhere, or when you had slumped over on the train and fallen asleep on his shoulder. his mind was spinning now, keeping him from sleep.

what was it about you? everytime you done something or said something that he had found particularly...endearing...he felt the same feelings that he felt today: the warming of his cheeks, his stomach feeling like it was doing somersaults, his words tripping over his tongue. what was happening? why was he acting so unlike himself? why was he acting so—

his eyes shot open as he pieced everything together.

"oh god," he whispered to himself in the dark, staring up at the ceiling wide eyed and awake. as it finally settled into him why he'd been acting like so stupid around you lately, so completely out of character, he threw his hand up over his face and took a deep, loud breath.

oh god, he thought, repeating himself. i'm fucked.

katsu2ji © 2025. please don't copy, modify, or do anything of the sort with my work! i work very hard and you simply do not have my permission.

[boreal-sea]

okay sorry you don’t like the word Zionist I’ll come up with a new word and it’s weirdassbitch btw and guess whatZzz ummm yeah you fit the bill. I don’t know man 😭😭😭😭 the fact you’re only posting about gofundmes when it’s about Israeli hostages or only ever being like “okay yeah what’s happening to Palestinians is bad” in conjunction with “so about this anti semitism we’ve been having…” means you’re obviously biased you’re just biased and hey… hey holds your hand it’s okay ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️ We can work through this… together *looks away shyly* also I’m like Jewish like by blood. I didn’t even have to convert sorry I’m laughing converts you’re valid but boreal I guess I’m just like…. Better than you at being Jewish? Idk btw and hey maybe the reason why antisemitism is rising is because you guys are all like yeah so we deserve Israel because we lived there 1000000 years ago and if you hate Israel you’re anti Jewish soooo yeah…. Yep maybe having being Jewish synonymous with a genocidal state isn’t smart idk just my thoughts. I think having Jews live all across the world is so beautiful it brings a tear to my eye… I think shoving us all in one place is gay as hell to be frank. Whwtagevrr. I was born in USA born and raised and my family came from Ukraine. I have zero claim to a plot of land 6000 miles away just because I wanna have a sick ass vacation home. maybe that’s why you converted I’m just joshing around it would be funny though if you went through all that just to build a cute little Resort on stolen land. I don’t know boreal. I think I’d just rather have my BLEGH :P, not a :•]

I have not posted a single gofundme for Israeli victims. I’m not sure why you’d make up that lie? Please feel free to look back in my blog as far as you’d like, you won’t find one. It’s even in my blog description that I do not reblog gofundme posts.

I do post links to organizations that directly help Palestinians in Gaza. I have done so fairly often. I don’t recall ever posting a link to aid organizations that only benefit Israelis.

Do I often talk about antisemitism and Gaza at the same time? Yes. These two things are inextricably linked. What is happening in Gaza right now wouldn’t be happening without antisemitism.

Am I biased? No more than the average human being on Earth. I personally consider the folks screaming “Death to Israel!” to be a lot more biased than myself, as I am simply calling for peace between Israel and Hamas. I wanted a peaceful solution from the beginning. You can even find posts on my blog right after Oct 7th where I compare Israel to the USA after 9/11 and state my fears that Israel will have a disproportionate reaction. I loathe the political posturing of both Netanyahu and Hamas and I hate that they both dragged this out so long. Netanyahu wanted this to look like Trump’s victory, which disgusts me. And Hamas allowed their people to suffer for over a year! They’re disgusting, too. Every leader involved in this conflict failed their people.

Our personal feelings about whether or not native people like the Jews “deserve” to live in their homeland is irrelevant — Israel as a country exists here and now. Though it does bring up the interesting question: do you think if the USA just waits long enough, native Americans will also lose their landback rights? How long will that take?

Jews don’t really live “all over the world”. Nearly half live in the USA, and the other half in Israel. This is because all the other countries were so violently antisemitic to the Jews living there the Jews had to flee. In fact, after Israel was founded, a lot of countries literally forced their Jews out under threat of death.

Jews still suffer from antisemitism all around the world, and did so even before Oct 7th. The increase in antisemitism since Oct 7th hasn’t exactly made diaspora Jews feel safe. “A country you’re not even a citizen of did a bad thing, so now I’m going to firebomb your elementary school” isn’t fertile ground for cooperation, is it?

I don’t agree with everything Israel has done. I don’t have to. I think it is a country in crisis that needs major reforms, much like the USA. But I don’t scream “death to America!” either. I live here. I want to make it a better place. I want them both to be better, to live up to the ideals they espouse. To be free, and safe, and prosperous.

I want Gazans to be able to go home. I want them free from the cruelty of Hamas, which has allowed its people to die and suffer since it took power in 2005 and refused to hold any more free elections. They are tyrants. I want Palestinians in the diaspora to come home, too. I want them to have a safe, prosperous country where their culture and children can flourish!

I want peace. If that makes me a “weirdassbitch”, then so be it. I’ve been weird my whole life, anon!

[sparklespirit]

Just finished Heavenly Tyrant by Xiran Jay Zhou and it was incredible, have many thoughts on Qin Zheng that I must share. Spoilers below the cut (major ones are marked but the post has lots of spoilers so read with caution if you want to avoid)

Ok so he’s such a compelling character. He’s human and idealistic and ruthless and terrifying. He demands to be taken seriously. However I also think that on a conceptual level he is simply so funny. None of these moments are humorous in context but like. You will understand what I mean

featuring such hits as

“No I wasn’t being sexist, I was just literally dying and did Not wanna move thanks very much”

Being so incredibly disappointed that society is somehow more sexist and capitalistic than in his day 200 years ago. Like “aren’t you people better than this? No? You’re gonna get less sexist real fast or I’ll sic my wife on you. The capitalism I will solve myself using her ex-boyfriend’s underground crime networks”

his coronation speech was literally “in my capacity as the legendary god-emperor who founded your country, which I have done through my control of a massive fuck off dragon robot that can and will turbo-murder you, I declare that we WILL be having a communist Revolution whether you like it or not. All power to the people but no I will not resign my position or give up control of my bigass mecha thanks very much”

he simply will Not Think About how his new empress has been married before, kinda. And also her other boyfriend is now his head advisor which isn’t awkward at all, and no he’s not insecure but also anyone to copilot with Zetian had better be a eunuch for Perfectly Reasonable Reasons That Have Nothing To Do With Insecurity

Canonically does not understand dick jokes

he’s the only main character that hasn’t murdered his family so you would think he might be more hinged, and yet is responsible for the massive reign of terror, and is somehow even less hinged than Wu Zetian who has to be the reasonable one (and that is. Saying Something given that Wu Zetian in the last book was the angriest most ruthless character I’ve ever read and now she has to be the comparatively hinged one??)

worryingly literal about “no gods no masters”

and, crucially, the funniest one in my humble opinion:

Less than zero understanding of consent and bodily autonomy UNLESS AND UNTIL he’s actively fucking. Like man learned exactly One Lesson on consent but dude, making sure you have a safeword does not make up for the whole [MASSIVE SPOILER] nonconsensual egg harvesting and foot reconstruction and all that shit! [END SPOILER] Genuinely it’s hilarious to me that he is responsible about getting consent but ONLY about the sex shit and NOTHING ELSE which is arguably the more important shit (especially the you know, less-fake-than-agreed-upon pregnancy, which uh. Should definitely be a joint decision!!)

anyway this book was an experience and I will probably turn around and reread it before I need to return it to the library because I just KNOW theres things I’m not getting because I just wanted to Know What Happened

[HUGE SPOILER FOR END OF THE BOOK] and also the end of the book was just the meme of two astronauts looking at earth with Qin Zheng going “wait it’s all capitalism?” And the Heavenly Court going “always has been” which I will probably make at some point that is not 4am!

[aciddrattboyy]

Mσσɳʅιɠԋƚ

┆ꜱʏɴᴏᴘꜱɪꜱ - "you and aki have a... complicated relationship. one you both know will end in heartache even if you cant stay away"

ᴍᴏᴠɪᴇ ꜱᴛᴀᴛꜱ: ★ Starring: Aki H. x F! Reader ★ Run Time: 2k ★ Genre/Warnings: [Rated R: Adult Film/Drama] angst, smut, fingering (f!receiving), penetrative sex, crying while having sex, emotional sex ★ someone who had found me thru my old ao3 acct requested that i upload my older works so anon this is for you !! that being said absolutely NONE of it is edited/read thru bc reading my writing makes me want to vomit. pls enjoy :p

▶▶

“i knew you’d be out here,” you sighed, walking past the sliding door that led to aki’s balcony. there he was sitting, a cigarette sitting pretty on his lips as he looked out at the city. aki takes a drag of it, blowing it out slowly before tapping the end of it over the ashtray. 

“how’d you get in here,” he mumbled as he fished in his pocket for his pack of cigarettes, routinely handing you one without another thought. you take it, dragging the other chair over next to his before sitting down with him.

“i asked denji to keep the door unlocked before he went to bed,” you answer simply, patting your pockets for a lighter that you don’t seem to have. “can i see your lighter?” aki nodded, quietly pulling his lighter out and handing it to you. mumbling a thanks you fumbled to start the lighter, hand shaking slightly. once you finally get the cigarette to light, you wordlessly hand the lighter back to him, taking a long hit. 

“you shouldn’t be here,” aki’s voice was low, steady as he spoke even though the tension between the two of you continued to grow. 

“i know,” you said quietly, taking another hit. “codependency is a funny thing isn’t it?” you kept your eyes out on the lights of the city out in front of you, not having enough energy to look aki in the eye. 

“y/n what’re you talking about,” through your peripheral, you could see aki looking at you, his eyebrows furrowed. you opted for closing your eyes, tapping your cigarette against the arm of your chair.

 “well you’re dependent on these cigarettes aren’t you? you look for these whenever you feel stressed, tired, depressed - basically anything even though you know it’s bad for you,” you tilted your head up, rapidly blinking to keep any tears at bay. “i’m the same way, except it’s not cigarettes i look for.” it was quiet for a moment, a cool breeze drifting by as you tried to figure out how you were supposed to word what you wanted to say next. 

“what’s going on,” aki’s voice was unusually soft, a type of gentleness you’ve never received from him before. this caused you to open your eyes, looking at him with a weary smile. 

“i’m quitting public safety,” although you tried so hard to keep it in, tears began to silently fall down your cheeks. you saw something change in aki’s expression, although you couldn’t quite put a name to it. “i didn’t come here to try to convince you to quit with me. i know you are too focused on your goal,” your voice was strained as you kept eye contact with him. without too much of a second thought, you took his hand in yours. “i came to tell you that you better not even think of fucking dying,”

using your other hand, you began to wipe the tears that now seemed to be flooding out in a nonstop stream. sobs begin to wrack you body as you curl into yourself. too distracted by the sound of your own sobs, you didnt even register the feeling of aki rubbing circles on your back. 

“y/n look at me,” he cupped your face in his hand, tilting your head up to look at him. the sight of his glassy eyes was enough to shock you enough to stop crying. cigarette long forgotten, he moves his other hand to wipe the tears off of both of your cheeks. in this moment aki knew what he was going to do would be incredibly selfish. he knew this would be a horrible idea that would hurt both you and him. but seeing the desperate look in your eyes was enough for him to want to throw it all away. within an instant his lips found yours, kissing you just as desperately as you looked only moments ago. 

without wasting another second you kissed him back just as passionately, tangling your fingers in his hair as you squeezed your eyes shut tightly. the kiss was messy, teeth and tongue clashing as the two of you tried to show the other all the feelings you kept buried. aki only broke the kiss when he absolutely needed to take a breath, leaning his forehead against yours as he panted against your lips.

“this is a bad idea,” you murmured with a dry chuckle as you traced his bottom lip with your thumb. “this is a very bad idea,” slightly hurt by your words, despite knowing how true they were, aki was about to pull back. was about to maybe give you one final hug before sending you home. but as soon as you felt the slightest shift in his position you grabbed his arm. “but we already came this far…”

“we don’t have to go any farther,” he spoke softly as his lips moved against yours. he was willing to go as far as you wanted tonight. knowing this would be the last night you would ever see each other.

“i want to.”

you weren’t sure how you ended up in aki’s bed, a blur of bumping into furniture while kissing messily being the only explanation you had. here you were now, under aki as he absolutely worshiped your body. leaving wet kisses over the expanse of your collar bone and neck, he began unbuttoning your shirt. his shirt, along with your jacket were tossed somewhere along the path to his bed.

“aki,” you called softly, carding your hand in his hair to try to pull you away from your neck. he immediately got the message, placing his lips on yours as he finally got your shirt completely off, tossing it who knows where before bringing one hand to grab at your breast.

with neither of you wanting to break the kiss, the both of you struggled to get each others pants off, giggling into the kiss at how much harder you were making this for yourselves. after finally managing to shed off your pants only the thin material of your underwear remained. experimentally, aki pushed his hips down onto yours, pulling a moan out of both of you at the warm feeling og long awaited stimulation.

with a cautious roll of his hips, aki couldn’t help the small whimper that left his lips. burying his head into the crook of your neck, he continued to rut his hips into you, earning moans and whines from the both of you. 

“aki- please-,” your voice was filled with a desperation that you were embarrassed to admit you had. covering your eyes with your arm, you bit your lip, trying not to make too much noise as he pressed into your clit. with a shaky hand, he pulls your panties to the side, experimentally swiping ahead along your slit. gripping onto his shoulder tightly with your free hand you tried to keep your hips from bucking up into his touch.  

you could feel aki’s ragged breath fan against your neck as he slowly pushed one finger inside, cursing against your hot skin when he felt your fluttering hole clench around him. it didn’t take long for you to start begging for more. which he happily obliged, pushing two fingers in and curling his fingers upward and into the spongy spot inside of you. when you felt his thumb brush roughly against your clit you let out a small mewl, thighs trembling softly as the pleasure continued to build up. 

growing impatient, you snake your hand between your bodies and cup his erection, squeezing softly. you turn your head just a bit to whisper in his ear.

“i want you aki,” your breathless voice seemed to bring aki back to earth, causing him to lift his head to look at you. there was a certain pain in his eyes that you knew both of you would be feeling for the foreseeable future.

“yeah?” he asked softly, his tongue swiping over his bottom lip as you nod your head. “okay- okay needa grab a condo-” you grab onto his arm as he reaches toward his nightstand drawer, shaking your head timidly. “y/n that’s a bad idea,” his voice was soft, as he hovered over you.

“you can use one if you want,” you squeeze his arm weakly, trying to offer a comforting smile. “im just saying we don’t have to… i trust you aki,” the shadows on your face from the city lights being filtered by his blinds made your features look so much softer. he took a moment to take in your face, trying so hard to commit every little detail to memory. 

he exhaled shakily, placing a chaste kiss on your lips before pulling away, taking off his briefs before sliding himself back between his legs. you sit up, leaning against your elbows as you take in the sight of his hair cascading around his head, covering his face completely as he kept his head down.

he shifted closer to you until the backs of your thighs rested snuggly against the top of his. raising his head, he studied your expression before his eyes trekked down your body, all the way down to where the two of you would soon be connected.

“ let me know if you need me to stop,” he mumbled as he held onto your thigh, other hand languidly jerking himself off a couple times before running it between your folds. “oh fuck,” slowly, he began to slowly push himself inside you. 

you whimpered out his name, head thrown back as you felt him shift over you, leaning over slightly to place his lips on yours. you were tight around him, walls clenching as he pressed into you. gripping onto the sheets under you, you sat up, leaning back on your hands as your mouth chased his. he placed a hand against the nape of your neck with a sort of tenderness you knew would be the first and last time feeling it. he placed his other hand on the small  of your back , shifting your position until you were straddling his lap, chests pressed together as he bottomed out inside of you. 

you wrap your arms around his shoulders, burying your face into his neck as you tentatively lift your hips before dropping back down. your movement elicited moans from both of you as aki moved his hands to your hips.

smothering kisses all along aki’s neck, you began to move your hips with his help, soft pants and whines leaving both of you as the muted sound of skin slapping clouded the room. no words were spoken for a while, too scared to verbalize feelings and wishes that could never be fulfilled. 

aki brought his hand down to your lower abdomen, using his thumb to rub at your clit as he continued to help you fuck yourself on his dick. you clawed at his shoulder blades, a string of whines and calls for his name falling on all too eager ears as your thighs started to tremble. 

“ gonna cum aki,” you felt tears well in your eyes for a multitude of reasons. the three word phrase was on the tip of your tongue and you so desperately wanted to say it. he swore under his breath at the feeling of you clenching around him so hard.

“go ahead yn, let- let go,” his voice was strained, almost sounding painful as he exercised all restraint to not cum inside you when he felt you cum around him with a high pitched whine. he didn’t last long, quickly lifting you off of his dick, and jerking himself off until he came all over your stomach. 

your legs ached as you continued to sit on his lap, heads resting against each other as you both came down. when reality began to sit in you felt the tears pooling in your eyes again. 

“aki i-”

“don’t,” his voice definitely sounded very pained now, his hands balled into fists on your thighs. 

“i’m sorry,”

“y/n please don’t-” you quickly cupped his face in your hands, tilting his head to make eye contact with you. through the light sneaking in the otherwise dark room, you could see the tears slowly falling down his cheeks. 

“i’m sorry,” your voice cracked as you tried to blink the tears away. “aki i love you.”

i hope you enjoyed !! reblogs/comments are very appreciated <3 ʟᴏʙʙʏ ﹕ꜰɪʟᴍᴏɢʀᴀᴘʜʏ 𝄃𝄃𝄂𝄀𝄁𝄃𝄂𝄂𝄃

[thevikingwoman]

So happy to be going for Year of the OTP. For January, I picked sharing clothes. which is a favorite trope of mine. And the confederate haori does look great on Meryta, of course.

Fandom: Final Fantasy XIV | Words: 870 | Read on Ao3

Tansui x Meryta Khatin (warrior of light) | sometime after shb | fluff Rating: Mature. Clothes sharing stealing, a small rest day, sensuality, mild possessiveness, Tansui has a problem, the problem is he is very much in love, reference to sexual situations

Heat

The day was hot and sticky, as if a wind had blown the heat and steam from Hell’s Lid all across the Ruby Sea. Many of the Confederates had set out in boats, or simply jumped in the waters surrounding Onokoro. Of course, someone has to be patrolling, and collecting, but Tansui is not one of them, not today. Not when Meryta is here. Seeking a cold breeze, Tansui and Meryta commandeered a small vessel and set out on the waters.

The seas were not much cooler, however, so they found a small sandbank with a knoll and a lonely tree – not much shade, but enough. From there, they waded and swam the ocean, joyfully splashing about like children. Until they engaged in some very adult activities, that is. Tansui still thinks it’s unfair Meryta can breathe underwater, but today he’s not complaining.

He’s currently resting under the tree, the reflection of the evening sun making the waves glow orange, as if they are on fire in truth. Meryta is stretched out in the sand, soaking up the last sun. Something about the heat of the sand being nice against her scales.

He lets his gaze roam over her naked form. Her back and her ass, her tail swishing lazily in the sand. The sun on her scales and horns, rendering them almost translucent at their dark green ends. Her feet, the soles a lighter green than the rest of her body. It’s too hot for him to lay in sun, but he’s content to stare, to lazily enjoy the shade and her presence.

He must have dozed off, for when Tansui wakes, it’s dusk. The moon has risen, and a few bright stars light the darkening sky. Meryta, perplexingly, is in the water.  He stretches, and walks to the water’s edge.

“Taking another dip?”

“No.” She fishes something out of the water. A piece of cloth? “Tide almost got my clothes.”

He chuckles. “Did it get you too?” Now he’s awake, he can see the sandy strip is narrower than before. Meryta flicks her tail in annoyance, the tip of it skimming the water.

“It’s not funny.”

“Sure looks funny to me.”

“What if I hadn’t woken up? I could have drowned.”

“You can’t drown, Meryta.” He winks at her.

“Ugh.” She sounds more exasperated than angry, and he is glad of it. He would not stand a chance did she bring all her fury to bear. It’s not that he forgets her power, he simply chooses to think it does not matter between them. Tansui’s thoughts are rudely interrupted by a hard, wet hit to his bare stomach. Meryta’s soggy clothes, bundled up and thrown with considerable force. He doesn’t want to admit it, but he almost falls on his ass, making an undignified sound.

Meryta breezes past him, and swoops up his haori where he discarded it, when it was too hot to wear. She shrugs it on.

“I’m cold,” she says. “And all my clothes are wet.”

He knows, as they are currently dripping in his hands. It is cooler now, and he holds them away from himself, so his pants don’t get wet, at least.

Gathering his wits, he tosses the bundle of clothes in the boat, which he did have the foresight to pull far enough onto their island. He’s sailed these waters too long to make foolish mistakes.

“You could have told me the tide rises so much out here,” Meryta says, mayhap following his line of thought, her eyes drawn by the tossed clothes.

“I did not plan to nap. And neither did you, I suspect. I suppose we were worn out from the… swim.”

“It was a very good, warm, nap.” She smiles at him, bright and genuine, her grumpy demeanor all but vanished.

She stretches, his haori falling half open, revealing the tantalizing curve of her breasts, the scales scatted across her abdomen, and the shaded place her legs meet. He freezes, unable to form clear thoughts. He wants to push the haori off her body, he wants her to wear it always, just like this.

Powerful, effortlessly, she is wearing his clothes. She walks towards him, her tail swishing in front of her, drawing his eye to her thighs. He wants to touch. He craves her. He acts, reaching for her, pulling her close, kissing her lips, biting them. He wants to claim her, mark her, leave something with her, something more permanent than a shirt, he wants, he needs –  she bits him back, laugh in the throat and they break apart.

“Mine,” is all he gets out, his thoughts all jumbled with his sudden need.

“You can have it back when I have dry clothes,” Meryta says, “Maybe. It’s very soft.”

“It does suit you. A tad long, perhaps.”

He lets her think he was talking of the haori all along. He doubts she will appreciate the direction of his thoughts. Fierce and independent, she comes and goes as she wills, and he will let that be enough.

Meryta tucks her head under his chin, bumping it. “Maybe I should hem it.”

He thinks of it, her wearing it across the world, with her scions.

“Maybe you should.”

[hquntinghunter]

"you're so negative" no i am not. internally i am smiling wide thinking about my otp. internally i am giving so much love to the creators of what i'm hyperfixated on. externally, i have a rbf. also i was busy trying to go about my day before you came along. so goodbye. richard

[suddencolds]

.(personal)

[regenderate]

by the way i've been going through rtd's non-doctor-who work and the first thing i watched was queer as folk and i have to say. there's a lot going on in that show but my main takeaway is "it's extremely obvious that the guy writing this really wants to write doctor who." there are ten episodes and of those i believe seven mention doctor who in some capacity. the theme starts playing in the middle of gay sex. k-9 is there. the character responsible for most of these references breaks up with his boyfriend because the boyfriend can't name all the doctors. at the end he has a couple lines where i was like "wow this sounds like something the doctor would say" and then the next lines out of his mouth were about doctor who. all of this is retroactively much funnier now that rtd kickstarted a 20+-year-long reboot for the show

[itspileofgoodthings]

sometimes I make a post and then have to save it to drafts so I can gauge if it’s too shallow/flippant for me to share with the general public.

[monstrsball]

i bring you: the venn diagram of characters who used to have crushes on iwasuga. put together with the help of my mutuals (thank you ash, paige, and sou)

these crushes range from "thought he seemed cute and likeable whenever they saw them" to "kind of intense crush that lasted months, at the very least"

feel free to add on in the tags or replies <3

iwaizumi:

kyoutani

atsumu

semi [during high school]

ushijima [after they meet in california]

every non-volleyball sports captain at seijoh (boys)

both:

yaku

daichi

kageyama

kogane

watari

suga:

moniwa

lev

akaashi

shibayama

every guy on karasuno [except narita]

[everytaylorswiftsongisaboutcats]

BREAKING SWIFTIE NEWS:

NEW Reputation Setlist changes include sequence feat. Hand Puppets!!!

[oidheadh-con-culainn]

i do think it's kind of funny that ao3 seems to have made a blanket change to all the "mythology" tags to make them "religion and lore" (not a good change) EXCEPT the "arthurian mythology" tag, which remains intact despite a Number of people trying to get that one reworked or at least different wrangled for ages. they're like "we're taking mythology away from all the contexts where it might be applicable. and leaving it in the context where it's dubious. this is a sensible change"

[yeoroot]

Do you think Cater would have the ability to find Idia’s alternative accounts if he had any

Cater follows them and Idia starts screeching as he sees the notif like “you don’t even GO here!!”

[britneyshakespeare]

hank green is so iconic 

[evilgwrl]

I'll suck your dick for a long breeding kink Simon story (ily) 👉🏻👈🏻

i ❤️ breeding kinks and u anon

CW: BREEDING KINK, titty sucking, PIV (No protection, pls use this irl), oral sex (f receiving), praise, slight daddy kink?, cream pie, lactation kink kinda, orgasms yippee

There was something primal inside of Simon, an urge that simmered through him like magma, coiling into every vein and muscle with a need to be filled. It consumed him wholly, wracking his brain with images and thoughts.

Images and thoughts of you, full and round with his seed, his child.

Simon never knew he wanted a family, always content with the one he met on the field. That was until he met you. You were a ray of light, always cheery and smiling, so feminine and beautiful. He needed you, and that was enough, but he wanted more.

He had never approached it with you before, but he was always so careful in case it scared you away. It all began when you were waiting in line at the supermarket, a newborn straddled to his mother’s hips as it cooed at you, slobber dribbling down its mouth as its eyes crinkled with laughter.  You were so quick to smile back, waving with glee as you pulled funny faces, a chorus of laughter soon following from the little one.

It only got worse when you were on your period, raving on about how you sometimes wanted to be pregnant just to get rid of it temporarily.

But Simon believes it really struck him when you were fresh out of the shower, pushing your belly out for fun to look as though you were expecting. You turned to him with cheery eyes and simply asked, “Do you think I would look good pregnant?”

Now, it was all the Lieutenant could think of.

You were a doll, always rushing around for him after he returned home, begging him to relax as you tended to his needs. You would be such a good mother.

“You want me to run you a bath? Give you a massage?” You murmured, rubbing his shoulders as you sat on his lap, thick hands rubbing at your thighs.

Simon groaned in a pleasured tone, nodding, “Only if you join me, sweet’art.”

The bathroom was thick with lavender, small rocks of decedent salts melting in the heated water, clouds of steam fogging up the mirrors as the fan overworked. Your body moulded to his as the bath swished around you, gently rocking against your upper back as your hands wrapped around his shoulders.  

Calloused hands rubbed at your hips, kneading the flesh delicately as he rested his head into the crook of your neck, nuzzling into your scent with a deep sniff.

“Ain’ I the luckiest man alive to have someone like you, you’re always so good to me,” Simon mumbled, voice slightly muffled by his lips pressed against your skin.

Your hands found the back of his neck, pulling him away from you with a smile as you kissed him, “I missed you, Si.”

“I missed you too. And these,” he snorted, groping at your tits as you giggled, working your fingers through his hair.

His cock grazed against your pussy, nudging your slit as you adjusted on top of him, lifting yourself slightly as he brought a breast to his mouth. His teeth grazed against the fat enjoying the way your breath hicked as his tongue swiped your hardened nipple, your fingers gripping into his shoulder with a profound tightness.

Simon was quick to work his palm against the other, enjoying your subtle moans as he tugged at the nipple, drawing the other one into his mouth with a harsh suck. You were so complicit to him, rocking your hips as you ground against his aching cock.

The man was practically slurring against your tits, switching between nipples as he kneaded the flesh. His voice was quiet as he breathed against your skin, barely audible, “Need to fill these up with milk, makes me go crazy thinking about how sweet you would taste.”

Your ears were hazed over with arousal as you only grumbled out a ‘huh’ immediately melting as he began to lick at your chest again. Your breasts were covered in spit, nipples erect and sore as you whined into the steamy air.

Simon’s hands were heavy as he pulled away from you, tugging you into the air with ease as water dripped along the floor, leading a trail to your bed before you were plopped down, wet body squealing against the sheets. He was quick to spread your thighs, lapping in the way your pussy throbbed as he tickled you with kisses, peppering over stretch marks.

Two fingers were quick to spread you open, folds sticky with your slick before the hotness of his mouth sealed it with a layer of spit, suckling at your sensitive clit as Simon growled against your cunt. Your mouth was tingling with cries, prickles of pleasure settling against a sheer layer of sweat that soaked your skin.

Your body was entranced by his tongue, writhing every-time he focused on your nub, your own hands playing with your tits as you rocked against his wet muscle. “F-Fuck Si- just like that-“

You were so needy, so desperate for release as he worked against your movements, thighs closing around his head as he muffled sweet moans into your flesh.

“Tastes so fucking good,” he slurred, wrapping his arms around your thighs as he nestled in closer to your pussy. His cock was leaky with anticipation, moist with pre-cum, edging him closer and closer the more noise you made.

Your orgasm was fast, hitting you with ease as your back arched, thighs shaking as you came with a squeal. His tongue was rapid, licking at your juices like a madman as you moaned, attempting to push his relentless attack away.

Simon pulled away, chin drenched in both spit and arousal as he licked his lips, staring at you with unmistakable hunger. He was quick to work your legs open again, heavy cock hanging low as he tugged at it, pressing the angry tip against your clit.

“Need to fuck you, doll,” he spat, rubbing his pre into your squelching folds as you nodded. No matter how many times you took him, the burn always ached through you, working into your muscles as it coiled into a hot pit in your stomach.

His grunt was loud as he bottomed out, resting in the warmth of your pussy as you stared up at him with tear-streaked eyes, your mouth stuck in an ‘o’ shape. You were so full, cock rubbing against your gummy walls with every slight movement, already kissing your neglected cervix.

“Please move- please-“

He obeyed, pulling out before rocking back into you with a quick thrust. Simon moved your legs, holding them over his shoulder as he pounded into you with a relentless force, giddy on your fucked-out expressions, incoherent blurts leaving your pouty lips.

“Take me so fucking good baby, make me never want to leave. Need to cum in this fucking pussy.”

You clenched. Hard.

Simon paused slightly, staring down at your squinted eyes, hands rubbing at your pillowy tits before you relaxed again.

“You want me to cum in you? Fuck a baby into this pretty cunt, hm?”

You babbled out a yes, tugging at your tender nipples as he growled into the air. His pace was brutal now, desperate for release as you milked around his length, pants leaving your mouth in shallow breaths.

“Gonna look so fucking sexy pregnant- all full with my child. Gonna make me a Daddy? Gonna fuck you until it sticks. That’s it baby - keep sucking me in, just like that.”

Simon was feral, grunting into the air as he fucked his cock into your wailing mound, slick stringing down his full balls. Your screams were loud as your head tilted to the side, tongue lapping from your mouth as you mewled in the pleasure.

“You’re gonna be such a good mommy, aren’t you sweet’art? So fucking good- so fucking tight. Just need to breed this perfect pussy. All fucking mine.”

“Y-Yours, Simon. Please fill me up,” you said, voice cracking as you gripped onto his neck, pulling him flush against you into a mating press. Delicate fingers found your clit as you rubbed the wet bead, moaning against his mouth as he kissed you, an endless supply of adrenaline pumping through his body.

“You gonna give me as many kids as I want? Gonna keep you pregnant, so full and round with my babies. My perfect fucking girl.”

Your breath wedged in your throats as the coil grew in your stomach, sloppy motions rubbed against your clit as Simon fucked against your sweet spot.

“Milk my fucking cock, baby, that’s it- cum for Daddy.”

His words sent you into overdrive, your eyes rolling back as your noises halted, stuck in your oesophagus as your lungs jolted full of air. Simon was quick to follow, your clenches wrapping around his shaft as he came with a groan, hot spurts of come coating your walls as he gripped onto your neck.

The Lieutenant was reluctant to pull out, desperate to keep his seed inside of you, buried at the hilt. You whined at the loss of contact, thick cock leaving your aching mound with a huff as Simon rushed to the bathroom.

You melted into the sheets, gently stirring as he wiped your face and neck with a cool compress.

“Did so well for me,” he praised, rubbing at your cheek affectionately. You smiled, pressing a kiss to his wrist.

Thick loads leaked from your exposed cunt, a hiss leaving Simon’s throat before two fingers pushed his work back in.

This man meant what he said, he wasn’t stopping until it stuck. Until you were pregnant and forever his.

[nullominous-q]

Dud of a haiku

No intent but to create

Cheese grater assist