#i should've just typed this in the post huh

[ryanthel0ser]

[jensthwa]

show & tell (SMG x reader).

part of the love's an uncharted path universe ★.

SUMMARY:

You have known Mingi since you both were fourteen. You’ve been by his side through thick and thin and you would do anything for him, really, considering he’s your other half. When he has an unfortunate bed experience and asks for your help and you say yes, he starts considering that, maybe, you’re just the best friend a guy like him can have.

PAIRING: best friend!mingi x afab reader.

GENRE: childhood best friends to ?

WORD COUNT: 8k.

WARNINGS: SMUT ☽ (MINORS DNI) attempt !!! at comedy, wooyoung being a little shit, hwa being the voice of reason, sex talk, pet names (love and also dude and bro but in a sweet way), mingi scaring the sense out of you, descriptions of female anatomy, kissing, dirty talk (sort of), teasing, a little bit of voyeurism, fingering, squirting, almost getting caught, unresolved feelings.

NOTES: had to do a lot of research for this one, so i figured nothing better to post as my first fic here! this is 100% self indulgent, as all fics should be, and i think i've re-read it so many times that if you find a typo or something that just doesn't make sense, you can blame it on english not being my first language i guess lmao. i hope you enjoy it and if you do feel free to send to my askbox/reblog/type in any feedback or thoughts! <3

POSTED: july 18th 2024.

masterlist. / part two.

“Delete her number right now!” 

“She's such a bitch for saying that to you…” 

“And over text too? Wow.” 

“Yeah, no, I didn't like her from the start.” 

Wooyoung’s living room comes to life once again that morning, voices echoing and insults flying out, all towards the girl Mingi’s seeing. 

Was seeing. You're sure she's out of his usual rotation with the lovely shit show she just caused. 

You stay silent, your eyes fixed on your best friend's expression, on his red cheeks and apologetic eyes because everyone told him that girl was bad news. 

He should've listened to you when you told him you liked her friend better. She was a sweet girl, clearly had a thing for Mingi. 

Unfortunately, Mingi has a type. And that type always ends up breaking his spirit one way or another. 

But you stay silent, letting your friends have their little rants about how much of a bitch she is for hurting Mingi's ego like that, until he covers up his face with his hands and lets out a frustrated whine. 

“That's enough, everyone. I think he got it.” You smile a little and everyone turns to you, Yunho’s chest heaving and everything but Seonghwa (who also kept his mouth shut all this time) interferes before anyone else has the chance to start again.

“You know you shouldn't feel ashamed for that, right?” he asks Mingi, who slowly lowers his hands to his lap and looks at you for a brief second. You nod, confirming what Hwa says “No one is born knowing everything and she shouldn't expect you to know how to make a girl squirt.” 

“Jesus Christ,” Mingi whines again, closing his eyes “Don't say it like that.” 

“How else should I say it?” Seonghwa is confused but he laughs a little bit and turns to you. 

Being the only girl in the room, you think everyone it's expecting you to pick your friend up and join them in their insults but you can't (for Mingi’s sake). Instead, you let out a sigh “I mean, it's hard to even make it happen on your own without any help, Mingi. I don't know what the fuck she's on but…” shrugging, you extend your arm to pat him in the shoulder two times “Hwa’s right.” 

“So you do know?” 

“Woo—” Hongjoong reprimands right away and you turn to Wooyoung, confused.

“Huh?” 

“You said that it's hard making it happen,” he explains, smiling because he just found a new target for the next few days “So you must know.” 

Talking about sex with them was never difficult, it didn't make you uncomfortable whatsoever but you know what Woo is doing. 

You look down at Mingi before answering though and his eyes are glued to the carpet, begging for the topic of his unfortunate encounter with that bitch to die on everyone's tongue. 

So you take mercy on him. 

“Oh. I mean… Yeah.” You shrug once again, leaning back against the cushions on the couch while Wooyoung claps like he just heard the most hilarious joke ever. 

“You truly are amazing.” 

Rolling your eyes, you get up from your comfy seat “Sure. But it took a lot of practice and the whole ordeal was frustrating for me, so, again, I don't know what the fuck she was on,” you say again, smiling down at Mingi before taking a few steps towards the door “It's noon already, by the way.” 

“Shit.” Woo gets up quickly from his spot on the floor and everyone else follows suit. 

“Alright, everyone out! We have a midterm to cheat on.” San calls out and everyone takes it as their sign to actually leave (not just hang around the apartment) and continue with their days. 

This reunion was a little impromptu, just because Wooyoung texted everyone begging to come over and hang out with him and San before their online philosophy midterm. 

“And by that he means that you need to stay,” Wooyoung hugs Seonghwa hard, almost begging him with his eyes “We didn't study… Don't look at me like that! Please?” 

“I'm not doing your fucking midterm for you!”

You chuckle, leaning on the door and waiting for your ride home to get his shoes on. When you look down at him again, Mingi mouths a thank you and you blow him a kiss. 

When you get downstairs, you swear you still hear Wooyoung begging his senior to take the test for him. 

Everyone is quiet in the car. You can tell they're tired from exams and life in general, so you don't press them with questions and just let the music play in the background while you look out the passenger window and, eventually, at Mingi. 

His grip on the steering wheel lets you know he's a little more affected than he let on back there. But, again, you say nothing. 

You know better than to pressure him into telling you his feelings. 

Mingi and you have been friends forever. He lived a few houses down from yours, becoming your first friend when you moved to the city. You both were fourteen when it happened, so you've known him long enough to know what happens when he gets his heart broken. 

Not that Mingi loved that girl or anything, but he never really took embarrassment well. He didn't when the first girl he liked rejected him in front of the whole ninth grade class and he didn't when his pants ripped in the middle of the stage while performing a routine with his dance team on senior year. 

You stood by his side every single time and every single time he waited to sit down and let everything out, collect his feelings and talk to you through his frustrations. You really loved that about him, because he never said anything he regretted just because he was upset at the moment. 

Maybe that's why you two have been friends for so long. Opposites attract, or whatever your mother told you one time. 

In reality, you think it's because you two complement each other well. 

He knows when to speak his mind and you're kind of impulsive, heart on your sleeve and sharp tongue ready to defend your and your loved ones honor if needed. 

That's why it takes a lot of strength for you to not pull up that girl's number from his phone and give her a piece of your mind. 

One by one, you drop your friends off in different parts of the city and when it's time to go into your own house, you circle the car and Mingi rolls his window down.

He reads the look you give him a little too well, so he opens his mouth to stop you but you shake your head. 

“Call me, come over or just let me know if you need anything,” you start before he says anything “If you need me to beat her up, I can do that too.” 

He huffs out a laugh “You don't even know how to fight, love.”

You sigh at the nickname, he's been using it since the time you told him you had a crush on his friend, way bsck in highschool, and that you were positive you were going to get together and he would csll you love because that's what good boyfriend's do. 

Turns out, you weren't exactly his friends type. Neither were the other girls in your school. 

“I don't give a shit, I'll do it,” You two smile to each other fondly for a few seconds and then you tap the top of the car “Thanks for the ride, dude.” 

“You’re welcome, bro.” He rolls his eyes, annoyed because he hates when you call him that, but waits for you to get inside either way. 

And in the solitude of your room, you wait. 

You distract yourself with papers that are due in a few days, you start studying for your finals even though they're months away and you even go downstairs to say goodbye to your parents when they leave for a fancy dinner with their colleagues before you hear your phone ring. 

Mingi's FaceTime comes right on time, because you were getting really anxious from the radio silence on his end. 

“I have a small query for you.” He puts on an accent that makes you grimace immediately and he laughs at you. 

“Ew. Never do that ever again,” you beg, going back upstairs to your room “Go ahead.” 

“How do you do it?” 

“Excuse me?” 

“How the fuck do you make yourself squirt, love?” 

Oh. 

Definitely not the conversation you were hoping to have with him. 

It caughts off guard and you stammer your response “Um… You— I mean, it's not really a thing I can explain.” 

“You have such a way with words, though.” 

You stare at him through the screen, annoyed, and he just laughs again “Don't make me come over and beat you up.” 

“Alright, alright,” his giggling dies out and you distract yourself from the heat you feel creeping over your cheeks while putting away your statistics prep for the quiz you have next week. There's a bit of silence and then you hear him sigh “I do really want to know, though.” 

“If you're asking me this to then go over to her house and prove her wrong, I'm not telling you shit.” 

“No! No, that's not it at all,” he defends himself quickly when you turn your head to the camera, scowl in your face “When she asked me to do it, I really did try to make her, you know…” 

“You said squirt so freely a minute ago, Mingi,” you tease, smiling, but at his expression, you give in “What exactly did you do?” 

“I tried to, you know, do it like they do it in the movies,” he demonstrates his point with his free hand, his middle and ring finger down on his sheets, pressing and moving side to side “And she was enjoying it and she came, but nothing really… came out.” 

“Wow, first of all: you make her come and she has the nerve to give you shit over text? I hate her,” you shake your head, disappointment written all over your face “and second of all, that was a terrible mistake.” 

“What? Going like this?” He does it again and you roll your eyes, laughing a second later. 

“No, dude, trying to porno your way into making her squirt.” 

“Oh.” His movements on the sheets slow down and you grimace again. 

“Please stop doing that,” you beg and he snaps out of his thoughts to look at you through the screen. You take your phone and move to the bed, resting your head against the pillows with a huff. 

You ponder for a moment. You're sure telling him what he wants to hear it's not really a threat to your friendship, but it's also something that's very personal and intimate. You can talk about sex with Mingi and the other guys, sure, what doesn't mean you tell them about your sex life. 

Maybe that's why Wooyoung was so excited earlier today, because you spilled something that involves you directly and not something vague and general like you usually do. 

“Would it give you peace of mind if I explained it to you?” You ask, your voice barely a whisper as you sit straight on the bed. 

Your best friend takes what feels like a lifetime to respond and, when does, it's in a hushed tone as well “Please.” 

You groan and you comply either way, trying to find the right words to even start “Okay, I'm going to be very technical about this.” 

“I wouldn't expect anything else from you.” 

His teasing tone makes you glare at him for a few seconds before dismissing it with a click of your tongue “The very first thing you need to make sure happens, is that you wash your hands—” 

“Yes, Y/N, I'm not a virgin,” he huffs this time, annoyed “I know all of that, just skip to the part where I make her squirt.” 

“Jesus, fine! I also want to clarify that this works on me and I'm not really sure if it'll work on anyone else, alright?” he nods and you look away from the screen because you're not sure how to look him in the eyes “The first thing that I do— The first thing that you need to do,” you correct yourself quickly “Is make sure she's comfortable. And I mean, the space. Towels, water bottles… She needs to hydrate a lot.” 

“Hydrate… a… lot…” You turn your head to the screen and your jaw goes slack at what you see. 

“Are you writing this down?!” 

“I’m making sure I don't forget anything!” 

“You're unbelievable…” You let out under your breath and take a deep one before resuming the, apparently, class “Squirting can be confused as peeing and—” 

“Shit, hold on.” He interrupts and you hear his mom’s voice at the door, asking him something you can't really catch through the shitty airpod audio “It's just Y/N… I'm not really saying anything so I don't understand how I'm being too loud for— Yes ma'am.” 

You try not to laugh because he's literally being scolded right in front of you. 

Old habits die hard, and Mingi's mom loves to put him on the spot. 

Your laugh dies hard as well, because the next words, for some reason, make your heart drop to your ass. 

“She's telling me to either cut it out or go to your house, so… I'm coming over.” 

“Oh, I— Hello?” Your lockscreen mocks you because the call literally ended before you could tell him to go and fuck himself “Shit.” 

You don't know why you panic, but you do. You tidy up the room, you change your pijamas into something more presentable and you try to remember what were you telling him before he pulls open your bedroom door. 

“Mingi! Fuck, you scared the shit out of me “ you're panting, hand over your chest. 

He’s also panting, like he runned to get to your house, but he looks dumbfounded by your reaction “Your mom literally gave me the spare keys in your presence.”  

When he steps closer, you notice he's wearing cologne and that his hair it's a little wet, still, so you figure he took a shower before calling you tonight. 

Which means he probably wanted to sleep everything off, like he usually does, but whatever this is made him call you. 

“Yeah! But I thought you— Nevermind.” He shrugs and gives your hair a kiss before he moves to sit at your desk, the same way he usually does when he steals your laptop and notes to complete his assignments for the few classes you share. 

God. Somehow, you wish he was doing just that so it brings back some sense of normalcy. Maybe then, your heart can calm down enough for you to understand why this specific situation has your senses going insane. 

You sit back down on your bed and try to get your heart back to its place in the meantime. 

“They're not home, right? I didn't see your dad’s car.” 

“Company dinner.” 

“Ah.” He nods and you both fall in uncomfortable silence. It shouldn't be awkward, but it kind of is, even if you laugh when he pulls out the notebook he was writing on from underneath his oversized shirt and steals a pen from your pencil case, it's still a little weird. 

You gulp. 

“So, squirting can be confused as peeing.” He recalls the last thing you said with a smile and then he turns to look at you for a second “Go on.” 

You're grateful he's taking notes all of the sudden. He's turned to you, so you have a clear view of his back and you can freely take a grounding breath before continuing “It can make you feel very uncomfortable if you think you're going to pee yourself and that's really why most women don't squirt in the first place.” 

“You sound like you're reading a text book.” He confesses with a laugh. 

“I told you, I'm being very technical about this— Besides, I did my research when I was trying to…” you gulp again “You know.” 

“You said squirt so freely a minute ago.” Mingi teases you the same way you teased him earlier and you squint your eyes in return. 

“Very funny. Anyways… Yeah, when you feel that, you usually tense up. You need to relax before even making it happen,” he nods, writing it down quickly “I also read that, depending on the person, you can confuse the liquid with, like, usual… arousal? Yeah, arousal” you sound more confident the second time you say it, unsure on how to call it because you never really explained anything related to your vagina to anyone else. 

He turns to you, confused “So… If she doesn't squirt a lot, how can I tell if she did it?” 

“I guess you'll notice it in her reaction?” You shrug and then cough a little to try and get rid of the sudden lump on your throat “I mean, it's not my case, so I wouldn't… I wouldn't know that.” 

Mingi, because -you guess- hates you, just raises a brow and looks you over one time before turning back to his notes. 

“A-anyways,” you cough again “It's all in her g-spot. It happens because it gets stimulated and that g-spot it's like…” you, once again, try to find the ideal words to explain “It's like the upper wall of the vagina? No, no, that's not right,” you see him draw a line over what he clearly wrote down on the paper and you laugh, apologetic “It's more like the, uh… Like the front wall of it.” 

“Front wall?” 

“Y-yeah?” you offer, nervous and unsure “I mean… Ugh, let me explain again. Something that you need to take into account is that you can only find it if she's really, really turned on.” 

“O… kay.” 

“Sort of like when you get hard we, uh, also get hard. Just differently,” you notice he's no longer taking notes when you turn to him again and the room is suddenly very hot. 

The AC’s on, right? 

Fuck. 

“And apparently it only really shows up when you're really aroused. The g-spot, I mean,” Quickly, you're up from your bed and walking around it, fetching your water bottle and taking a big gulp of it with your eyes closed. 

Mingi clears his throat a second later. 

“So it feels hard to the touch or…” 

“Not really, um… It kinda feels like a berry.” 

He laughs “What?” 

“Yeah, it's kind of soft but it has a texture to it too. And we, uh… have this gland that fills up with the liquid— Kind of like a prostate gland! Yeah, that's what that article said,” putting even more distance within Mingi and you, you sit back on the bed, just on the other side “If you try to do it before it fills up, you end up with nothing. That's what frustrated me the whole time I was learning how to do it.” 

“You didn't drink enough water?” 

“No, no— It fills up when you get really turned on. And when I was trying, I was trying way too hard and didn't, uh… I didn't do a lot of foreplay before trying, s-so.” You nod, finishing the explanation in a softer voice. 

Your cheeks feel hot and you swear your upper lip is sweating a bit. Why would you even say that? 

“Y-you didn't touch yourself enough or…?” 

“Exactly, I didn't, I just… Tried t-to stimulate it. Wasn't even wet enough so I used, uh, lube.” 

“Oh… Lube. Sure, okay.” He nods again, and then moves his hand over his face, looking away for a second “And then?” 

“I'm not really sure how to… Give me a second.”

What were you even telling him before exposing yourself like that? Before the tension in the room skyrocketed in a suffocating way? You're not sure. 

Oh, foreplay. Okay, what's next? 

“Fingering,” you say out loud when you remember and at the sudden word Mingi turns to you, eyes wide and you stumble over your words yet again “Y-you need to finger her to stimulate the g-spot, duh.” 

“Don't duh me, Y/N, I'm learning!” 

“Sorry!” 

“Okay! Now what do I do when… fingering.” 

That makes you frown. You're not really sure what to tell him next. So you look straight ahead and, unintentionally, move your ring and middle finger the way you do when you're touching yourself. 

In the silence of the room, you audibly hear Mingi’s breath hitching and that draws you back to reality. 

When you look at him, his eyes are solely focused on your fingers. 

“I don't really know how to explain this next part.” You sound apologetic, your lips tensing into a straight line. 

A bit passes. 

And then another one and another one where Mingi looks at you with a weird, foreign expression on his face. 

So you open your mouth to apologize to him, but he beats you to it. 

“Then show me.” 

You swear you never even heard him sound like that before. Or maybe you have, the tone of voice similar to when he just wakes up, low, grouchy, as if his throat might be dry. 

It just never affected you this way. 

“W-what?” you blink hard, a few times, trying to focus on whatever the hell is going on. 

“Show me how you do it… I-if you want to.” 

“Mingi!” 

“I just— Look, you don't have to,” he says right away “If you don't want to, you can forget I ever asked but I'm so… curious”, he says, getting up from your desk chair and planting his knee into the bed “And I'm also really butthurt over what happened. I want to learn but I don't really have anyone else to ask.” 

“What about, uh… Minseo! Yeah, what about her?” you offer quickly, also getting up. 

“San's ex?!” 

“I don't know any other woman that you also know, Mingi!” 

He gulps and breathes heavily, gathering his words, his thoughts, just like he always does and you remember: This is Mingi. Your Mingi. The Mingi you've known for years and care about more than anything. 

“I'm asking you because I trust you,” he says, looking you over once again “And because if I fail, you're not… going to make fun of me for it.”

There it is. 

You soften at that and he seems to relax at your reaction. His demeanor lets you know he's not just saying that because he wants to see you touch yourself, he's being honest. 

So you decide to be honest, as well. In a whisper, because your voice will tremble and give away how strongly you feel about his request. 

“I've never done it in front of anyone before.” 

“So no one has ever make you—” 

“No,” you confirm before he even gets it out and you sigh “I never ask for it and I haven't really… I've only slept with—” 

“Hangyeol.” He nods and scrunches his nose in disgust at the memory of your highschool boyfriend. They never really got along and it was a shame, because Han was a great guy, he just wasn't the one for you. 

“Mingi,” you walk over to him and he straightens up his spine “This could really… I mean, there's no getting rid of me on this lifetime, buddy,” reminding him makes him smile and you do as well, nervous, your body on high alert “But this could mess us up.” You finish in a whisper. 

“I'm not letting that happen.” He says back, eyes scanning your face before zeroing on your eyes “There's no getting rid of me either, love.” 

That nickname is going to be the death of you, you're sure. It makes you suck in air you very much need at this moment. 

Fuck it. 

“I'll… get the towels, then.” You smile a little even though your cheeks are burning and you feel a little dizzy while holding his gaze, but you don't back down. 

Before you move, though, he stops you with his hand holding your waist “I know where they are. Stay here.” 

You could literally melt right now. And you know it's a short trip to the downstairs hallway closet from your room, so you make sure you strip your duvet before things get messy. 

You should go to the bathroom, too, to clean yourself up a bit before Mingi finds out what you find out when you sit on your bed. 

You're so wet. 

And it's so fucking embarrassing, because you're not supposed to feel this way for him, for this.

Because, if anything, this is clearly just an educational experience.

And if Mingi’s excited look when he re-enters your bedroom tells you otherwise, you're choosing to ignore it for the clearly educational experience’s sake. 

“These will do?” 

You take the two mismatched towels and place them on the bed right away, not even looking at him. 

“Yep.” 

You think he nods but you're not sure, you just caught a glimpse of him moving towards your desk while you pretend to fix the towels in the bed to perfection. 

“Okay, so… You need to, uh, be comfy and shit. Drink water, you just did that a few minutes ago…” when you turn to him, he's reading his notes like he's actually about to conduct an experiment and you chuckle before shaking your head “The… The foreplay part should be next, right?” 

“Right…” you drag out, biting the inside of your cheek before he looks back at you. 

“You look really tense, Y/N,” he deadpans, looking down at his notes again “You need to relax so it can happen, right?” 

“You're about to see me touch myself and you think I can relax?” 

“Oh,” he frowns, immediately and then blinks a few times to refocus, you think “I'm not the one doing it?” 

“Uh… Yes? Later? I thought you wanted to see me first, y-you… You asked me to show you…” 

You can feel him think, the gears on his brain twisting and you think he's going to backpedal at any second because he's not really saying anything. Then you see it, the moment the image crosses his mind. 

And the next second you have him in front of you, towering over your form and then he's not.

Getting on his knees, he tentatively places a hand on your knee and parts your legs so you can make room for him to touch the end of the mattress with his chest and raise his chin just enough to make you think he's asking you to kiss him.

Oh God, you want to kiss him. 

His voice is a sweet murmur when he speaks again “Show me how to get you there, love,” he sounds like he's pleading, like he's begging you to instruct him and your breath catches when he moves his hand up your thigh “What do you like?” 

Your mouth moves before you can even think “Kiss me.” 

You don't even notice you're leaning forward until his breath fans against your chin and he tilts his head even more so that your noses touch. 

“How do you like being kissed?” 

You breathe out a laugh, a little annoyed by his constant questioning “Figure it out, Mingi.” And then the last thing you see is his smirk before his mouth presses against yours. 

It's not what you expect. If anything, you expected him to take the lead. Han used to do so, all the guys you've ever kissed did it as well. You don't really know why his patience surprises you, but it does and if your heart could race even more, it would. 

Because he waits for your guidance, waits for you to grab his shirt and jank him closer, waits for you to sigh against him and then returns the gesture when he feels your fingers move upwards and tangle in his dark hair. 

His mouth is complying to yours, his tongue is exploring it and wetting your lips in the process and you've never felt this good with anyone before. 

That's something you'll need to unpack later, but your brain disconnects when your best friend lets out a noise the second his hands touch your waist under your shirt and you forget, for a split second, that the point of this is to have you on your back pleasing yourself for him to learn. 

Because you want nothing more than to hear him make that noise again. 

The kisses grow needy and so do you when he trails a path with his wet lips from your chin to your neck and the next thing you know is that your back is against the towels you laid down before and his mouth is kissing the valley of your breasts over the cotton of your shirt. 

You look down and it takes a second for him to feel you staring before he looks up at you “Should we take this off?” 

Your voice gives away how gone you are when you reply a simple yes and your shirt is on the floor the next instant. 

Now, you're sure this is not the first time Mingi has seen you in your underwear. You both have gone swimming before and he has walked into your room a million times while you're getting ready. You're even sure he's seen you walk out from your bathroom in this specific bra before… But he's staring at you like it's the first time he's been able to trace the way your breasts spill a little bit over the fabric of this old bra you decided to wear today, like it's the first time he's allowed himself to enjoy it. 

Like it's the first time he's allowing himself to feel any sort of attraction for you. 

“Fuck,” you whisper, shallow breath hitting his cheek when he returns his mouth to your jaw “Let me… Come here.” 

You scoot up until your head rests against your pillows and he follows, resting his body weight on his side and chasing your mouth when you turn your face to him. 

You should speed this up. There's no way you're not going to feel like shit if tomorrow you wake up and remember you're letting yourself enjoy this more than you should. 

There’s no reason for you to lose your breath when his fingertips trace softly the skin under your breasts or for your legs to grant him access so quickly when they reach your belly and bypass every other part of your body before going straight in between them. 

And he notices it too. 

“I don't know why I asked you so many questions before,” he starts, turning his hand so that he back of it and his nails start caressing the inside of your thighs through your sweatpants “I know what you like. I pay attention to you whenever we're talking about sex with the guys.” 

You frown, about to remind him that you never speak directly about your own experiences but he continues his ministrations, giving your other thigh attention “I usually watch you closely in case any of it makes you uncomfortable, but I notice your reactions when they speak about something that you like.” 

Oh. Heart on your sleeve, your biggest flaw. 

“Like that one time Woo was going on and on about marking and you couldn't stop fidgeting on your seat…” his nose traces your jaw softly before his teeth take the skin underneath it and you gasp just enough to prove him right “Or that time Yunho said he hated teasing because he's an impatient little shit” he chuckles, his index finding the spot next to your mound and going down slowly until his knuckle graces the crevice where your leg and your hip connect “and you defended it until we had to stop you guys from yelling each other over it…” 

Your breath shakes and your eyes close at the sensation “Mingi…” 

“Am I wrong?” 

You shake your head no and you can all but hear him smile when he speaks again. 

“Of course I'm not.” 

You open your eyes and expect him to look at you the way he does when you're unable to defend yourself against his quips, but he's not. His eyes are following his own actions and his bottom lip is pulled by his teeth when he takes the fabric of your sweatpants and pulls it up, enough to give you some friction where you need it the most. 

“Can I take this off?” 

“Fuck, y-yes.” 

Joining your shirt on the ground, you're left only in your underwear while Mingi is fully clothed and it bothers you out of nowhere. 

“You're so wet already…” he observes and you blush, puffing some air and covering your eyes with you hand. He just laughs “That's a good thing, it means that I'm doing okay.” 

He's doing more than okay. Damn all the experience he has and the way he reads you so well. 

But his sweet tone gives you some clarity and you support your weight on your hand to fix your position on the bed. 

“Alright, let's… resume the lesson before my parents get home.” 

“They probably won't for now. The company dinners last until like… two in the morning, usually, right?” 

“That's when they decide to go out for drinks.” 

“Your mom always wants to go out for drinks.” 

“Let's not talk about my mom right now!” you beg and he laughs again, making you chuckle alongside him and you're glad he's talking all of this -the kissing, the teasing, the sweet-talk and the wet patch on your underwear- so well. 

The awkwardness from before dissipated the moment he got on his knees in front of you and all that followed was this lovely tension you're dying to keep between the two of you forever even though you shouldn't. 

“Show me, love,” he pleads and you sigh, his mouth finding your cheek for a quick second, encouraging you “And then you can show me how to make you feel good, too.” 

You stare at him for a few seconds “Damn, you're good,” he shakes his head and you smile, getting rid of your underwear and pushing the quick moment of embarrassment being bare with him in the room gives you “Remember that this is what works for me, okay?” 

He nods and then props himself up so he can see it better. 

You take a second before your fingers dive into your wet folds and, when you do, you gasp at the feeling. 

You've never been more wet just for kissing and teasing before. What the fuck. 

You do what you usually do when you're alone for a while and try to contain yourself from moaning because Mingi's eyes keep moving from your fingers to your face. Then, you remember you should be talking him through it, as well. 

“You see how I'm building it up?” you start, chest heaving and he hums as his reply “I'm not trying to make myself come but I'm kinda just… edging myself a little bit.” 

“Edging,” he repeats and then hisses when he sees your thumb pressing into your clit just how you like it, making you sigh heavily “I know all about that, that's good.” 

“Y-you do?” 

“You'll be surprised,” he smiles, proud of himself. 

“Okay,” you continue, taking a deep breath “Then you know about prepping, too,” he nods “So, a finger first…” you say, swallowing hard when your index makes its way into your cavity without much effort. 

Dragging back and forth for a minute or so, you're incapable of containing yourself any longer. Air leaves your mouth in pants and your eyes close when you drag the pad of your finger upwards, locating your g-spot with ease because you're used to it.

“And then, two fingers.” 

“Mhm.” 

“Look at the position of my hand. I read that these two fingers work the best because they're longer than the rest, although…” you look at Mingi's hand over your belly. You didn't even noticed before this that he was touching you, but he is and his thumb is tracing a pattern that both relaxes you and sends shivers down your spine “I'm sure that it won't be a problem for you, huh?” 

He sends a cocky smirk your way and you would've smacked him if you weren't so… preoccupied. 

Pressing your precious spot and then dragging back and forward, you stop the movements altogether. It felt too good, way more than good and it's a different sensation of what you're used to. 

And it's all because of him. 

You look at his side profile, his eager eyes commiting to memory what you're doing to yourself, probably taking mental notes now that his notebook is long forgotten over at your desk and… 

He deserves this. He deserves to be the one to have this, just tonight. 

You hate to leave what feels like it's about to be your best orgasm in the hands of someone who's just learning, yet alone a man.

But Mingi is not just any man. 

“Mingi,” you call and his curious eyes leave your heat a second later “your turn.” 

“Did you… Did it happen? I didn't see anythi—” 

“No,” you interrupt him, your fingers leaving you and you turn to him, your clean hand finding his face “show me what you learned.” 

His mouth parts, but you have a newfound confidence and a glint in your eyes that is new, so nothing comes out. 

“Prove that bitch wrong.” 

That seems to do it. 

His eyes go from being confused to spark with determination and want and electricity runs through you again because he seems so relieved he gets to touch you sooner than expected. 

Shyness and nervousness buried six feet under, you both smile to each other before you feel him. 

His fingers gathering your wetness, his thumb finding your clit with ease and expertise. 

“Wettest pussy I've ever touched.” You can tell he's a little lost in the heat of the moment but it's okay. So are you. 

Fuck. 

It's been way too long since someone else touched you this way, so you all but melt at the circles he draws on your clit. He paid close attention before, because he's touching you just the way you like it. 

“That feels so good…” 

“Yeah?” he asks, dark eyes finding yours before a particular stroke forces you to close them. And then he gathers enough slick to insert his ring finger inside and you can't help the moan that slips past your lips. 

You lift your hand to cover your mouth, but Mingi clicks his tongue in feign disappointment “I want to hear if I'm making you feel good, love. Don't hold back on me just because this is unconventional.” 

The worries die altogether with that. 

And now that you have free reign to stop containing yourself, you don't know how to stop. 

It's not long before his index joins his other finger but he doesn't go for it right away. He fucks you slowly, allowing you to get used to the unfamiliar stretch of his way longer, way thicker digits until they slide in and out with little effort. 

His pace picks up after what feels like ages and your hand fists his shirt for the second time tonight, nodding and moaning in encouragement. 

“Deeper,” you instruct “curl them upwards and go deeper, you'll feel it then.” 

He obeys immediately, his chest heaving and his mouth parting in delight when he finds it. The pad of his finger presses down on it tentatively and your grasp on his shirt hardens.

“Is that it?” you nod and he does it again, which earns another moan “What do I do now?” 

Before you completely get lost in the feeling, you decide to drop the step by step bullshit aside and give him the full instruction in hopes that he'll remember it all without fucking up: “What works for me is pressing… Fuck, yeah, just like that a-and then…” you take deep breath “Just a little harder… Yeah, then rub it in a circular motion while maintaining that same pressure… Fuck, Mingi!” 

He's a little too good at following instructions, because he touches you like he's been doing this forever and soon you feel the familiar swell, the usual buildup of it all and he's taking you over the age like it's nothing. 

You forget how to speak, you forget how to tell him what he needs to do next and so, when you finally explode, you take his wrist and place his two fingers over your clit. 

When you move them side by side, he lets out a fascinated giggle but knows exactly what to do. 

A second later, your release is coating your thighs and the towels underneath you and you don't register anything else because your ears are ringing. 

Did you lose consciousness for a second? It feels like you did. 

That was the best fucking orgasm you've ever felt in your entire life. 

And when you come back down, you only register the sound of your breathing and plump lips kissing your face, his fingers stopping their pace once he realizes you're done with it. 

Opening your eyes, you stare at your popcorn ceiling for a second. Then, you look at Mingi who's already staring at you with a what the fuck just happened expression. 

It makes you laugh. Softly at the beginning, post-orgasm bliss takes over but then Mingi laughs too and your whole chest swells with inexplicable pride. 

You don't think twice before kissing him again. When you realize you did it, you pull back and blink at him like he didn't make you see stars three seconds ago. 

“That was…” his eyes do the thing he usually does. You never notice it until now, but he scans your face so frequently you've grown used to it, but now… It feels different. His teeth nip his bottom lip and he shakes his head before speaking “Come here, love.” 

And then he's kissing you again, slow, intimate, beyond the stupid lesson you just taught him. 

But you don't mind it one bit. 

You sit up, getting on your knees on the bed and basically forcing him to do the same. Ignoring the gross sensation of the wet towel underneath you, you pull him further into you until his chest presses against yours, until his hands roam your body and settle on your waist, securing the embrace. 

This time, when you pull away, there's this whole unspoken new thing between you. 

“That was…?” you press, smiling a bit, pulling both you and him back to reality. 

Right now, with you half naked and his hard-on pressing on your belly, it's not the time to discuss your feelings. 

“Possibly the coolest thing I've seen,” he starts, giggling when you roll your eyes “and the hottest thing I've seen, too,” you shrug, dismissing his stare because it's making you feel hot all over your body, again “and I'm really, really grateful you said yes, love.” 

The soft tone he uses to say the last bit relaxes you and you nod, deciding it's not the time to tell him you never even came like that on your own. 

Instead, you decide to grasp this intimate moment and extend it as much as you can. You can see Mingi is not expecting it when you reach his sweatpants and let your shaky thumb trace the outline of his cock. 

Closing his eyes, he lets out a pleased sigh before he grabs you by the back of your neck and rests his forehead against yours. 

“This is supposed to be purely educational, Y/N” 

“Is that what you want it to be?” you softly ask, pulling your hand away but then his hips buck and chase after your touch, making you smile despite the emotions swelling in your chest “Let me help you… Please…” 

“Fuck, don't beg me, love.” 

“Don't make me beg, then.” 

What the fuck are you even doing? 

“Y/N, I—” he stops suddenly and you're too lost in the moment to notice why. 

But then the sound of keys and a door closing downstairs scares the fuck out of you and you push Mingi away without thinking it through. 

He lands with a thud on your bedroom floor, next to your discarded clothes. 

“What the fuck, Y/N?” he whispers-shouts, both shocked and offended, but you're getting off your bed and picking up your clothes and the soaked towels so you don't really care about his feelings right now. 

“Bathroom. Now.” 

You're so blessed for having your bedroom right next to the upstairs bathroom. And so blessed that it is your bathroom and you don't have to share it. You’ll get on your knees and thank your gods afterwards, but right now you can only think one thing.

Don't get caught. 

Lord knows you'll never hear the end of it if Mingi walks out of here with a hard-on. Your dad will kill him, your mom will cheer because she loves the idea of you and Mingi together and you'll probably pack your bags and move away if it happens. 

When you lock the door behind you and make a quick show of putting your underwear and pants back on, you hear Mingi chuckle. 

“We can always tell them we're having a sleepover, Y/N, you didn't have to karate kick me off the damn bed!” 

“Hush!” But he just keeps giggling at your very obvious flustered state.

You're about to rip him a new one when he takes two strides, backs you against the bathroom sink, and catches your lips in a quick, sweet kiss and all your worries dissolve just like that. 

“Guess they didn't go for drinks after all..” 

“You think?” cocking your head to side, the smile on your lips can't be fought at this point. 

He returns it and leans in for another kiss, longer this time and you sigh against his mouth before pulling away because you really, really shouldn't be doing this right now. 

You hear your mother calling your name and then footsteps up the stairs. A murmured she must be sleeping and a hum from your father before they pass the bathroom door. You truly only relax when you hear their door closing at the end of the hallway. 

“Okay, we're safe now.” 

“When were we ever not safe?” 

“When I was half naked on my bed, Mingi!” 

He shakes his head with a smile and takes a step back. 

You clear your throat. 

“I really did want to help you out but—” 

“Raincheck?” he asks and at you hesitation to say yes, he continues “If you want to. If you don't, it's okay. We… We'll figure it out, okay?” 

“Okay.” 

He smiles again “Good, uh…” 

Mingi seems unsure on what to do next. Feeling the same, you decide the best thing to do is to get him out of here. 

Opening the bathroom door, you carefully peek into the hallway, taking his hand in yours and beckoning him to follow you down the stairs, trying to make as little noise as possible. 

“Shit, your shoes…” you whisper. 

“I don't think they noticed if they didn't barge into the bedroom to check on us like they usually do, love.” He returns, in the same tone. 

That does nothing to ease your mind, but he makes sure to put them on quickly and then grabs your shoulders, shaking you in a teasing manner. 

“Quit worrying, Y/N. I can feel you thinking.” 

Of course he does. There's no one, in this world, that knows you better than him. 

It makes your heart flutter and it shouldn't. But you're getting on your tippy toes and stealing a parting kiss before you think about it too much. 

It's irresponsible for you to do so, but Mingi grabs your waist and extends the duration of the kiss and suddenly you don't give a fuck about your parents or anyone else finding out about this… shift in your dynamic. 

“See you tomorrow?” he asks against your lips and you nod. 

“See you tomorrow.” 

And with that, he leaves. 

You lock the door and practically run to your room after. 

What the fuck have you done?

If you read all the way down here: THANK YOU SO MUCH. Any feedback would be greatly appreciated and since it’s an open ending (sort of), let me know if you want a second part! 

© jensthwa, 2024.

[starkeysprincess]

rafe is the type where if you gently try to tell him that he’s a little selfish in bed he’ll “make it up to you” (he says that sarcastically) by tying you to the bed and making you cum over and over again with his fingers, mouth, even a few of those toys you thought he didn’t know about and ruining them for you but not his cock no matter how bad you’re crying because you “clearly didn’t appreciate it before” 🙂‍↕️

wait, i love this cause he would pull this shit fs warnings: slightly mean!rafe, light bondage, mentions of overstimulation, oral (f receiving), fingering, use of vibrator & i think that's it ??? a/n: sorry this is short, im working on assignments but i wanted to write this & post it as soon as you sent this earlier so sorry if this is shitty

"i'll make it up to you" were the exact words that left his mouth, leaving you to believe he was going to be gentle with you but you should've known better by the cocky little smirk on his face.

maybe telling your boyfriend that he's a little selfish in bed probably wasn't your best idea because it led you to your current situation, which was having your wrists tied to the headboard of your bed, your legs pried open and his face buried between your legs.

you attempted to close your legs but his large hands pinned your thighs down to your bed, squirming under him, on the verge of your third or fourth orgasm but at this point, you're not sure because you lost count.

your brain is fuzzy, the only thing you really remember is how many times he made you cum with his fingers and now he's determined to make you cum again but with his mouth instead. he's enjoying the sight of you writhing just from his mouth and he chuckles against your dripping cunt as you cry out, cumming on his tongue.

your eyes shut, trying to control your breathing as you're relieved when he pulls away and moves away, your legs trembling and clit throbbing from the previous orgasms. he admires your panting, trembling form for a few seconds and your eyes spring open when you feel a familiar vibration against your clit.

you look between him and your vibrator that was in his hand with wide eyes. "what? didn't think i'd know about this, huh?" he grins, pressing the vibrator further against your clit, "you can never hide anything from me, princess".

he pushes two of his fingers inside of you causing you to gasp while he continued to toy with your clit with the vibrator, increasing the speed the more you whined and whimpered.

you're not sure how much more you can take and all you want is to feel his cock inside of you. "r-rafe" you stammered out, your voice shaking, tears welling in your eyes. "r-rafe" he mimicked, his eyes glued to yours as he's pushing his fingers in and out of you, curling them.

he sets the vibrator to its highest setting, making your tears stream down your face, "so fuckin' pretty when you're cryin' for me" he grins. "p-please" you stutter, "what is it, baby?" he hummed, "n-need you inside of me" you plead.

"no can do, baby, just giving you what you want, what you desperately need" he teases, "thought i'd make it easy for you?" he tsked, "you clearly didn't appreciate my cock so i gotta show you what happens when you call me selfish".

tagging: @oceandriveab / @babygorewhore / @xxbimbobunnyxx / @drudyslut / @drewstarkeyslut / @rafescurtainbangz / @hallecarey1 / @heartsforvin / @redhead1180 / @eddieslut69 9 / @eternalbuckley / @kisses4angel / @hyperfixationgirl / @emilysuperswag / @ihe4rttwd / @42internetgirl / @lilacheavenn / @monkichixo / @rafesthroatbaby / @zyafics / @sturnioloshacker / @dragonslutsblog

[pomefioredove]

"stop saying things that make me wanna kiss the hell out of you!" with Idia please!

idia the kind of guy to talk tough over dms and then stare at you like 0_0 when you meet up

summary: "stop saying things that make me want to kiss the hell out of you" type of post: short fic characters: idia additional info: romantic, reader is gender neutral, reader is not specified to be yuu, kissing!??!?!

"stop saying things that make me wanna kiss the hell out of you!!!"

That's how it started.

Just one message on a night where you were both feeling a little too bold for your own good.

"yeah?? I'd like to see you try"

You'd been playing some stupid online game that Idia had been recommended, for much longer than you should've. It was well past two in the morning by now, on a school night no less.

Someone would nag you about it in the morning, but that's a problem for future you.

Current you is hidden under a sea of blankets, trying to hide the light of your phone screen from the room.

"maybe i will, huh???"

You smile at his reply. As if.

The game had been long abandoned, leaving you to your usual banter before you found something else to do together.

But it's almost three, and you're actually starting to get tired.

"im holding u to that. you better not get cold feet tomorrow"

No response. He's probably trying to come up with some witty comeback that'll leave you speechless, as always. But, nothing.

Weird.

You don't see much of him the next day, either. He hasn't been responding to any of your messages, and his status is offline, which is very unlike him. He's almost never not online in some capacity.

You're walking back to your dorm when your phone goes off.

"sending you my location. meet me asap"

Weird, again, weird. Idia being anywhere but his room is strange in and of itself.

Curiosity gets the best of you, and you end up somewhere behind the school, in a shaded grove.

And there's a head of glowing blue hair sitting against one of the trees.

"Idia?" you ask, a little dumbfounded. "What's up?"

He has his hands in his pockets, and a terrified look on his face.

Still, he speaks. "Ready?"

"Ready?" you repeat. "For...?"

You sit down next to him, and he flinches, clearly wanting to scoot away from you but not letting himself.

"Seriously," he sighs, sulking. "And you told me not to get cold feet..."

Then it clicks. Your face lights up, a little amused, a little flustered, but overall, very surprised.

He's going to...

You try to hold back a grin. "Yeah, I'm ready,"

Idia sighs (dramatically), mumbles, "Well, you asked for it," and kisses you on the mouth.

It's... not very good.

Tense would be an understatement, he seems to hold the static kiss for much longer than necessary, as if he's just as afraid of finishing it as he was starting.

After what amounts to a minute of nothing, you pull back.

"Before you say anything-" you say, quickly, noticing the devastated look on his face. "Maybe I should lead. Okay?"

Idia opens his mouth, as if to argue, but the only thing that comes out is a faint, squeaky, "okay".

You move a little closer, cupping his face in your palms, trying to figure out how to lead.

His whole face (and hair) is pink, and he's staring at you like you're about to take a bite out of him instead.

You smile, push his hair out of his face, and kiss him.

It's... a little better. He actually kisses back, and you pull away as soon as you feel him getting nervous again.

"I suck at this," he sighs. "This is so cringe. You should just get it over with and kill me now."

"Have you had enough, then?"

A long silence follows. He stares at you. You stare back.

Idia takes a deep breath, then kinda smiles. "...Third time's a charm, right?"

[feelingdozy]

I love your writing omg <3 it's MARVELOUS I'm so jealous!! could you do finnick odair flirting with a shy!gn!reader? Like he calls them cute and they just freak out and hide into their shirt or a blanket, etc etc? And he just keeps flirting until reader just covers his mouth and they make eye contact and it's a HUZZAH moment before finnick just kisses them?? sorry if this is really specific!! thank you if you fulfill this request <3

A Little Shy

Finnick Odair x Reader

Hunger Games Masterlist

Summary: you go out to town to find some supplies for fishing as it's the perfect season. You find yourself inexperienced with tridents, and someone comes along to help you find the perfect one to fit your needs.

Note: this is a super cute request and will probably take awhile to post because I want to make sure it is absolutely perfect, also thank you!! I try my best to write as nicely as possible

Warnings: mention of death and killing, slap (hand over mouth)

You had wanted to go to the market in district 4 for awhile, wanting to see what there was to offer at this time of the month. It was the prime time for fishing, so a lot of people had been stocking up.

You stayed for a few hours getting the basic supplies, making your way over to the tridents. You had never been a pro even as a district 4 victor, but had always admired people who were able to use a Trident so easily.

You looked around slowly at all they had to offer, wondering at that point if maybe you should get your own and try it out.

"that one's nice, huh?"

You jumped at the voice that came from behind you, quickly turning around. You should've recognized the voice, of course it was Finnick.

Naturally, you got shy knowing how much you admired his Trident skills as he'd won with them as the youngest in the arena. You hated the games, but loved the skills of the weapons that came with it.

"are you good at using a trident? I've never seen you use one"

He was watching you? I mean he was your mentor back then, but you were really a nobody. You thought your win was a bit sad compared to other people who had won with skill. It was the career in you talking, quickly coming back to realize the horror that came behind it all and that you were lucky to be standing here alive right now.

"not really, I'd love to learn though.."

Your voice was quiet and faded off as you glared at other ones surrounding the two of you.

"how about you come down to my house later and I'll teach you a few tricks y/n?"

You turned to him, his charming smile placed on his face as he found your eyes.

"sure"

A blush found your cheeks, a little intimidated to be taught to use a trident by the Finnick Odair. Even though you should've learned how to use a Trident in the training for the games, you focused on your hand to hand combat and nature tips and tricks then the main weapon of your district. It made you feel a little more reassured that you wouldn't die by accidentally eating the wrong type of berry.

You picked out a trident fitting to your hand, comfortable in your hold. Then it was time to start walking to the victors village that was surrounded by ocean. Their backyards went out to a beautiful beach, and then water. Constant, neverending water leaving room to do anything you aspire to.

The walk was peaceful, as usual. The weather was hotter than usual so if you were going to be in the water, why not change into a bathing suit? You quickly went home and put on a bathing suit beneath your clothing, hiding it before you got to his house.

You knocked on his door, his footsteps getting closer and your heartbeat faster. The anxiety hit as he opened the door. You just now realized his height compared to yours and how shy you were. It's the Finnick Odair. How could you not be a little scared?

"come in"

He said with the same charming smile as before, gesturing for you to sit anywhere you'd like. His place was nicely decorated, ocean themed items around you at every turn. Tridents sat on the wall, some framed and some just hung as a decoration.

He had gone to the kitchen, his back turned towards the living room. You looked at his hair that always looked amazing and you wanted to ruffle it and run your hands through it- wait. We're you actually thinking of.. no. This was Finnick Odair. Loved by the capitol, loved by the people in his district and by the other victors. He was an amazing person despite what he had gone through, most not being able to handle it all.

He brought out some cookies and sat them on the table in front of you. He sat down, the couch dipping with the new weight beside you slightly pulling you toward him, slowly sliding. Your cheeks now had a light blush again from simply being in his presence. His eyes glistened in the light of his house, his hair fluffy and his face charming and cute. You thought Finnick Odair was cute. The Finnick Odair.

He stared at you for awhile before breaking the silence.

"soo, you've never picked up a Trident before y/n?"

You nodded your head no. He sort of knew when he was training you many years ago, just a year older than you, wondering why you didn't pick up a trident. He admired your other abilities back then, knowing how to identify different leafs or berries and hand to hand combat were great abilities in general, but especially because you got put in the arena where you'd need just those skills, like it was almost fit for your win.

It's funny because you were by far the shyest tribute he had ever seen, you didn't talk much or make a fuss like many other tributes had done, but instead listened and took any and all information and tips and tricks from the past victors that only wanted to help. Why did people go out of their way to make a fuss?

Your head was turned down from his, scared to actually make eye contact with him no matter your past relationship.

"you can look at me y'know. I don't bite?"

He laughed, your head hesitantly turning upwards, scared that you'll reveal the layer of red forming on your now heat-radiating cheeks.

"no need to be nervous, y/n."

He said, and you swear he was teasing you at this point. You looked into the distance again, seeing him taking in your facial features from your peripheral vision. His eyes widened a bit before his classic smile appeared on his face that he always wore, except it seems a little more.. genuine than before.

"you're cute."

Your eyes then met with his again, and now greatly flustered in front of the man. He memorized your face in the moment, how your cheeks gained more color and your eyes widened. You couldn't even make words come out of your mouth, your heartbeat pounding too loud and mind too fuzzy to make a coherent sentence.

"huh-?!"

Was all that came out of your mouth. He slowly lifted himself up to where his arms were to the side of your face. You quickly pulled up your shirt, covering your slowly reddening face to where you might've been radiating heat, heat that he must've felt through the fabrics that layered because it was so warm.

"You're so cute. Shy hm?"

Your heartbeat pounded louder and louder within your chest as you once again admired the man who was above your sitting, now laying form. You buried yourself even deeper within your shirt before he could see even more obvious and powerful hints of red on the rest of your face.

"look at you. So red. You like me calling you cute sweetheart?"

A slap echoed in the room as you couldn't handle it anymore. You put your hand over his mouth, your heart not being able to take anymore of his flirting. You could feel his signature grin form under your hand as he put his hand on your arm. His hand slowly slid up til it reached yours, taking it and kissing the outside of your palm.

Your eyes met with his sea green. His other hand creeped onto your cheek, his head slowly getting closer to yours.

his lips collided with yours with a deep need to feel your lips for the first time. He deepened the kiss, his soft lips feeling amazing on yours. You couldn't believe your first kiss was with the Finnick Odair. Part of it because you were already in your twenties and you had never kissed anyone before, not having any partners when you were younger. But mostly because it was him.

You let him take the lead, not knowing what else to do. You let go as you had to take a breath even though you never wanted to let go of his soft lips, feeling like you had been in another world while kissing him.

"promise me you won't explode if I kiss you again?"

He laughed as you nodded, going in again for another kiss that had sucked you in, captured you.

You had just kissed Finnick Odair. Twice.

[scarlet-fantasies]

Eren is your first love hcs

Description: Eren is aware that he's your first boyfriend, but he’s not aware of being your first love. Also what makes you love/what he has done for you.

::𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬:: fluff

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

𝑃𝑟𝑜𝑚𝑝𝑡

𝐼𝑛𝑏𝑜𝑥 𝑖𝑠 𝑜𝑝𝑒𝑛

𝐶𝑙𝑖𝑐𝑘 𝑡𝑜 𝑗𝑜𝑖𝑛 --> 𝑇𝑎𝑔𝑙𝑖𝑠𝑡

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© 𝑠𝑐𝑎𝑟𝑙𝑒𝑡-𝑓𝑎𝑛𝑡𝑎𝑠𝑖𝑒𝑠 // 𝑑𝑜 𝑛𝑜𝑡 𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑎𝑙, 𝑟𝑒𝑢𝑠𝑒, 𝑟𝑒𝑝𝑜𝑠𝑡 𝑜𝑛𝑡𝑜 𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝑠𝑖𝑡𝑒𝑠. 𝑎𝑙𝑙 𝑤𝑟𝑖𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑖𝑑𝑒𝑎𝑠 𝑎𝑟𝑒 𝑜𝑟𝑖𝑔𝑖𝑛𝑎𝑙 𝑢𝑛𝑙𝑒𝑠𝑠 𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑡𝑒𝑑 𝑜𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟𝑤𝑖𝑠𝑒. // 2021-𝑃𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑒𝑛𝑡.

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What makes you love him/what being your first love consists of:

💚The way he admires your beauty and looks at you a lot.

💚Sometimes says thank you after a kiss as a tease

💚Was the first person to see your room. Would tease you just a bit if you had stuffed animals.

💚He'd smile, holding up the stuffed toy of a duck in his hands, "You still have stuffed animals?"

💚"Oh, there from when I was three, I should've put them away."

💚"No its fine, I think its cute that you have childhood memories in your room."

💚maybe need to make a post about rooms idk,

💚his room is a mess

💚Was the kind of guy that loved watching you from afar and admiring you before asking you out

💚He once told you during one of your first dates he said, “I saw you a couple times around campus but I couldn't stop but when I found out you started working here, I thought ‘I gotta meet that girl.’l

💚Of course, you probably didn't want to believe that because it just seemed like flattery but he worked up to what he said. I know it may seem kinda corny for him to say but he'd only say that to girl he means it too.

💚I mean if you think about it men will change their approach to a woman depending on their intentions. And that's basically what Eren did here. With his ex-girlfriends, he didn't say anything like that. What I will say is that if he was serious about a girl, he probably wouldn't realize it. He'd be the type to not notice his change in behavior. It would take his friends to point it out.

💚Loves to ask if he can kiss you in the beginning of a relationship.

💚Will keep the relationship private for your sake.

💚Finds a thrill in it, really tbh.

💚Plus, knowing your parents and his parents wouldn’t be involved, he likes that more.

💚He repays you w kisses when you do something for him.

💚If you weren’t sure if you two were bf and gf he’d find it kinda funny that you were confused.

💚“Did you just say boyfriend?” He’d ask.

💚“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to call you that, it's just saying a “male friend” doesn’t make sense in our situation. And I’m not really sure what else to say–I mean what do you think?”

💚He stops and turns to you, “Y/n, I can’t make the decision of being your boyfriend.”

💚Your lips parted as you looked down shamefully and mumbled. “Oh--”

💚A grin appeared on his face, “But I can ask you. Do you want me to be your boyfriend?”

💚You nodded, “I’d like that.”

💚When you ask about something he doesn’t like doing, like a specific date or whatever. He doesn’t tell you instead he’s reluctant and tries to see how much this means to you.

💚If you try to play it off like it doesn’t matter, then he’s definitely going to say yes.

💚“Oh well, I was just offering the idea.”

💚“We’ll go.”

💚“Huh?”

💚“I said we’ll go, I can tell how much you really wanna do this.”

💚He’s always looking for you and surprises you a lot.

How he found out:

💚You were in Mikasa's room and spending time with her and you got into the subject of your boyfriends and so she started to share about her first love and then the question came to you.

💚“So Y/n what about you? Whose your first love?”

💚Considering she’d be only one witnessing how you felt and Eren wouldn’t be the one to hear you figured why not let your best friend know?Of course, you were unfortunate and as Eren walked by Mikasa’s room he heard what she had asked you.

💚And he was definitely interested because not even he knew this about you. Mostly because he knows you'd never tell him. So he couldn't help but get curious and listen. If there was thing Eren was known for, it was that he loved watching you/listening to you and knowing everything about you, especially your feelings, which you'd never share or secrets you wanted to hide. So he couldn't help but want to hear, I mean, you two weren't exactly quiet after all he could pretty much hear everything you two were saying.

💚“C’mon tell me, I want to know.“ She urged, wanting to know what you were hiding.

💚Eren was on the edge of his seat to know by this point, seeing how dear it was to you to keep it a secret from everyone, including your best friend.

💚Mustering up the courage you’d admit, “Eren, is my first love.”

💚“What?! You mean you’ve never liked another guy before him?” Mikasa would ask, completely shocked about you not having previous crush or anything.

💚“No, I haven’t.” You’d admit, shaking your head.

💚“Wait so, your boyfriend is your first everything? Like crush, first kiss, all of that?”

💚“Pretty much.”

💚Eren, of course, had become quite smug by what he had heard. and he was definitely going to ask you about it. Especially because you'd never admit this to him. Of course to ask you he had to find the timing of this. He wasn't going to bring it up in front of others because he knew that would make you feel uncomfortable.

Confronting you:

💚You were watching TV together, well, you were, Eren was just looking at you. At some point, he wanted to get your attention and tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. This caused you to look at him, "What?" you asked, curious about what he was doing.

💚He'd shake his head before smiling, "It's nothing, I was just thinking of how nice you look."

💚You look back at the TV being at a loss of words as you blush. He'd chuckle at your shy action, "I guess I really am your first love then, huh?"

💚“What?” You’d say confused, not wanting to act suspicious since your conversation with Mikasa earlier has quite a similar topic. There’s no way he heard you both talking, right?

💚“Am I your first love?” He'd ask, looking at you to give him an answer.

💚“No.” You’d say as you avert your eyes and look back at the screen.

💚He’d smirk, “You’re such a liar~”.

💚“Ah!” You’d yelp as he push you down on the couch and started tickling you. “Eren! Hey, stop it!” You'd laugh trying to pry his hands away.

💚“Tell me who your first love is!” He’d shout, grinning with a wide smile, still tickling you while you squirmed.

💚“Tell me!” He’d insist

💚“No, I’m not telling you!—Stop, no more!” You’d answer stubbornly.

💚“Never!” He’d chuckle, his tickling getting so vigorous to the point of making you breathless.

💚Seconds felt so much longer and agonizing as he found new spots to tickle you, spots you didn’t even know you were ticklish there. This lasted for what seemed a while now and you wanted to get out of the tickles and giggling so much.

💚“Admit it! You need to admit if you want me to stop. Am I your first love!” He’d grin, trying to get you to cave.

💚Being out of breath you nodded your head “yes” frantically at this but that didn’t stop him from tickling you.

💚“You have to say it."

💚Seeing that this probably end you just gave up, “Okay yes! Yes, you are!” You’d admit finally with a blush on your cheeks.

💚“Gotcha.” He’d chuckle, finally letting go of tickling you to catch your breath.

💚“You’re not fair.” You rested your forearm over your face in shame as you didn’t want him to look at you.

💚He moved your arm away to give you a kiss. You could feel him smirking in this kiss. He pulled away to look at you, just as you were about to cover your face. But he caught you before you could, “Dang I didn’t think you’d actually tell me.”

💚“Shut up!” You’d pout, pushing him off you, “How long were you listening for?” You looked back at him, wondering when he decided to listen on your conversation with Mikasa.

💚“Hmm, the whole time, I couldn’t resist hearing everything you had to say, cutie.” He smirked, his arms wrapped around your waist as he pulled you into his lap.

💚Your eyes widen, “Everything, everything?” You asked, concerned, hoping he didn’t hear everything down to your fear of arguing and really liking him.

💚“Yeah your worries and how much you really like me, and you know basically how I’m you’re first love.”

💚You frown because you don't want him to know all this. “You weren't supposed to hear that.” You'd mumble, burying your face into his chest as he stroked your hair.

💚He’d glance at you before smiling, "What that you have the "hots" for me?" He'd laugh obnoxiously.

💚"Stop, that’s embarrassing.” You’d say annoyed.

💚"Never.” He’d joke, making you pull away to look at him with a frown on your face.

💚Seeing how you looked upset and annoyed he felt bad about it. But also thought you were really cute. “Awww, babe. I was just teasing I promise. I think you're really adorable.” He'd grin as his index finger tapped your nose.

💚At first you thought he was apologizing to you but really he just called you cute, to which you understood he was still playing with you.

💚“Eren—hey, you’re still teasing me!”

💚He’d laugh seeing you catch on as you crossed your arms, “you’re unfair.”

💚“Okay, look I promise I’ll keep it between us. ” He’d reassure pinky swearing with you.

💚“But still who would have thought.” He’d tease again, “you have such a huge crush on me!” Eren laughed seeing your reaction.

💚“Stop it, Eren!” You’d complain.

@bi-effing-simp @lucifugovs @xxghoulishspritexx @sp00ksic0la @keithandlevi-ontheroof @songbirdgardensworld

@bubs-world

::Previous Post::

1

[nekohime19]

AITA for refusing to forgive my cheating girlfriend when I kinda cheated myself?

(last pat tof this crazy adventure! Here we go guys!)

Again, thank you for all the insight, the situation is kinda messed up but you guys helped me take a step back.

Okay so I have one last update to this crazy love life of mine, but before that here are my answers to your comments :

TheWayoftheEnigmatic :

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Wukong is NTA

But man that whole situation is cursed! 😵

Still funny though.

OP response :

👀👀 Wukong??? Noo, that's TOTALLY not me. I'm, huh, another immortal monkey.

Followingthewater :

tie her up ig and let six out, she might attack you when she wakes so better to be prepared ig. If you can, try to calm the situation down as much as possible and try to communicate to her to avoid a fight. It's not fair she was clearly cheating on you and gets mad that you slept with her side piece, sounds hypocritical of her.

Besides that, if you're interest in six maybe later try to set up a time to talk again, try to find out what type of person he is before you start trying to date, y'know, to not date another 'bad guy'. Would suck if he was into any problems.

OP response :

Tying her up seem to be the best option yeah. Idk if I'll be able to calm her down but I'll try. 

I definitely need to hang out with Six after that. Jumping in another relationship isn't in my to do list but I do want to be friends with him. 

CommonRedditLurker :

Yikes OP this whole situation is kinda a mess. I'm sorry you got cheated on, but I don't think retaliatory cheating is the answer here. Really leaning toward a soft ESH, but that's just because I think you should've confronted and broken up with your partner before sleeping with someone else :/

CommonRedditLurker :

OP. . .what the fuck???? How did this somehow get even messier?

What an absolutely insane response to an already stressful situation! From shoving Six into a closet (there's a joke there), to PUNCHING and knocking out your partner. . .I don't even know where to start with this one. Honestly, OP you should post this in r/legaladvice, because sucker-punching your soon-to-be ex girlfriend is a quick way to get sued for battery :/

Also, this is definitely an ESH type of situation. Yikes just yikes

OP response :

I didn't really wanted to do retaliatory cheating, honestly things just… escalated.

I PANICKED!!! I mean, yeah, in hindsight it was the worst reaction ever but, well, it was punch or be punched.

Dragonfruit_Is_Real :

Should I just tie her up’ HELP THAT’S FUNNY AS SHIT WTF 😭 giggling

OP response :

Glad my crazy life is making you laugh 😭

LanZen :

Man this is a mess... Alright I would say yes tie her up, she already proved to not be wanting to listen if she ransaked your place so fast, instead of listening your side of the story, (the audacy of her to be pissed when she did it fist and maybe this wasnt the first time she cheated) also take anysharp objects she can cut the rope with from her, and then man up and talk the 3 of you and break up, no matter what she says don't take her back.

Such an asshole move to shove Six in the cabinet when both of you could use glamours by the way, but i can understand you panicked but don't do it again.

Also talk to bud, because you are a retired hero are you not? It can be asumed you wanted to have privacy, and well if he is telling everyone about you "partner" won't your enemies target him now? :/

And yes moraly and technically it wasn't a good move to punch her lights out but, she deserved it, for bud, yourself and six, even if it was reflex xD

OP response :

Yeah I don't think Venom would be willing to listen to us… Kinda feel icky to tie her up but at this point, I think I have to.

I really got to apologize to Six for pushing him like that, I just really panicked 😭😭.

I do have to talk about Bud… he has to know. It's gonna be an awkward talk.

Ranma1_half :

Not gonna lie I died of laughter at the last part. Ok here what you can do. First let's sixer out of the cupboard. Second tie her up and lastly confront her together. Wishing you luck and the gods have mercy on you.

OP response :

Oh yeah shit Six is still in the cabinet.

Sara :

I'm sorry but I burst out laughing at the end 😂 .... Tie her with a magic rope and tell her that she was the one who betrayed you from the beginning.

OP response :

Magic rope sounds kinda good. I have to search in my treasure trove if I have one.

Lagt :

.... WOW

I don't even know what to say to that-

For starters maybe let Six out????

And uuhhhh wait for her to regain conscience without tying her up?

Like uuhhhh

That was...

Yeah no that was not a smart move op

Also very ballsy of her to be pissed at you cheating on her without asking normally first-

OP response :

I do really need to let Six out 😭😭. Unfortunately, I do think the rope is necessary. She can be intense and I don't want to risk it. Maybe I should ask for Six input too?

Sakurabloom_26 :

Welp, the damage is already done.

I’d say tie her up and confront Venom along with Six and break things off (you already punched her and she knows about you sleeping with someone else, her finding out that it was with Six and that you already knew about her cheating when it happened isn’t gonna make things THAT much worse)

Be prepared for pleading and false apologies, followed by explosive anger, accusations, and threats of revenge.

Best of luck (sending hugs)

OP response :

You're right, I don't think the situation can become worse than it already is. At this point what do I have to lose?

Oh man, I'm not looking forward to her reaction and all this.

Thanks (Hugs received)

Married2thegrind :

NTA, Venom was trying to throw hands about the supposed 'cheating' despite her having done the same. I'd suggest putting her into a room without many objects, tying her up there than confronting her (if OP is really serious about her destroying HALF A CITY??) and going on fron there.

I also kinda want to see Six's reaction to all this, how he confronts her. The wrath of one(1) magic monkey is one thing, but the wrath of TWO?? Legendary.

Also, maybe talk to Bud about saying that kinda stuff in public, people don't need to know anout your personal life. (Also maybe take off the glamor during the official confrontation, for funsies)

OP response :

She did destroy half the city once, so tying her up might prevent… a dangerous situation. I really gotta let Six out of this cabinet.

I'm not really clear on what really happened with Bud and how Venom overheard everything. But I do need to have a serious talk with him about this type of stuff.

And you know what? I might take off the glamors, spitting her a bit.

Halfdeadhalfpaniced :

Make sure to use good demon binding rope. That hit was very justified but she won’t see it that way and you really need to tell her who you were cheating with and explain the whole situation. Make her know you know what she did and make your claim before she tries to take him back or turn this into some messed up Polly relationship. Have multiple backup plans just in case and try not to hurt or scare away your new partner.

OP response :

Oh right, I do need a solid rope or this is gonna be even more messy! I guess it's confrontation time.

I absolutely refuse to let this turn into a poly relationship, I have nothing against them but I'm not going back with someone who cheated on me. I think Six think the same.

So yeah, the situation was messed up and suffice to say I was PANICKING. I miiight not be the best guy to deal with complicated relationship stuff, as you all read.

Anyway, here is the last update :

AITA for refusing to forgive my cheating girlfriend when I kinda cheated myself?

After I punched Venom and she fell unconscious, I was really panicking. Like, shit, this felt like the beginning of a murder story. First thing I did was check if she wasn't dead. I knew I didn't punch her that hard buuut I do have a lot of strength and sometimes I forget how weak others can be (as an immortal it's easy to forget mortality is a thing). Luckily, as I thought, she was just uncousious.

So I'm relieved and then I hear Six ask what’s happening (he was still in the cabinet). So I'm like “Oh shit he's still in there” and I let him out. I apologize for pushing him like this but he brushes away the subject and instead looks at Venom, who is on the ground, passed out, with a bruise on her face. Noooot a good look for me.

He gives me a “WTF??” look and here is how our conversation went :

Six : “What did you do??”

Me : “I, huh, punched her?”

Six : “Is she alright?? We don't need to bury the body in the backyard do we??”

Me : “No, no, she's just passed out.”

Six : “Okay… But why did you punch her?”

Me : “She was ready to throw hands at me. What was I meant to do, not throw hands too?”

Six : “So you punched her?”

Me : “It was a punch or be punched situation and I panicked, okay!?”

Six : “seriously? What do we now?”

We argued a little bit and eventually I offered my solution : tie her up and then confront her. Six was reluctant, which I can understand, but when I told him how much Venom would be upset he changed his mind. Venom is an intense person, she already destroyed half the city out of pettiness, what would she do after all this? It was safer, for all of us, if she was tied up. So I went to my treasure trove and looked for a special rope.

I found one who might do the job. Honestly I didn't remember all the effects the rope had but it can't be that bad, right? In my defense, there are a lot of things in my treasure trove and after millennias it's hard to keep track of every artifact. By the way, Six called my treasure trove a “chaos hazard” which, rude, but I forgive him because he tripped on a vase and that was pretty funny.

So we tied up Venom and waited. But she didn't wake up even after thirty minutes. The thing was…Bud was supposed to come in the evening for a training session and I didn't want him to see this mess. So I tell that to Six and we try to wake her up.

Six was more gentle than me. He poked her a bit, shook her by the shoulder.

After an hour I decided to step up the “waking Venom” mission. I didn't have time for this mess. So I grabbed a bucket of water and I threw the water at her. It worked very well. She woke up drenched and angry. In hindsight, it might not be my best move (and kinda of a butthole move). It made her even more angry. But at this point I didn't have anything to lose. I did give her a towel but she threw it right back at me. Well, she tried but it's difficult throwing a towel while tied up.

So Venom started by screaming at us. Things about “How dare you punch me and tie me up!?”, all those things. I didn't interrupted her and apologized for the punching (and the water throwing😅) because, yeah, not my best moves. Then Venom notices Six and…. awkward silence.

It lasts a bit until Six decides to clear things up. He explains how me and him found out about her cheating and got drunk and… slept together. He said that he didn't have any intention to sleep with me but the alcohol and the bad mental headscape after finding out about her cheating made things escalate. I second that and I chime in to tell my own version. I admit I snooped on her phone and found out everything. Venom listens with a frown then she tells HER version.

She doesn't deny the cheating bc obviously at this point it's useless to deny it. But then she told us she felt neglected by me and I spend more time with Bud than her and I was prioritizing Bud training, and heroing, over our relationship.

It kinda made me feel guilty, and I wondered if I truly did that, but then Six stepped in and asked her “What about me? You got a good reason for leading me on like that?”. She repeated the same thing. That Six made her feel seen, and all that, and she needed to find comfort somewhere else.

Boy, Six looked really pissed off. He went on a tangent about how if she wasn't feeling good in her relationship with me she should have broken it off, that it was selfish of her to do that, and in the end it hurts all of us.

Venom retaliated by saying that everyone made mistakes and that even the both of us made one when we slept together. She said something like : “In the end everyone cheated, so we're equals and we can start again with a clean state.” She even proposed a threesome.

Honestly, that pissed me off.

Excuse me, lady, in what world is this okay?? I know I didn't handle this situation elegantly (tbh I barged in that like a bull in a chinaware shop) BUT there is no way we're going back to dating.

So I was feeling petty. I undid my glamor cause I knew it would piss her off seeing the love marks, and I stared right into her eyes, saying there is no way we're going back together.

Oh boy, she didn't take that well. Maybe I shouldn't have angered her? But, honestly, I wanted to. I know. I'm a petty monkey. What can I say? She really pissed me off with this and, anyway, angering her a tiny bit more isn't gonna make that much of a difference. Like, you wanna play the game with me? You gotta be ready to be beaten!

So this evolved into a screaming match. She accused me of being a hypocrite. How much it was unfair that I couldn't forgive her when I did the same thing and cheated on her with Six. That made me feel guilty, but I didn't back down. I was kinda glad for the rope cause I swear if she wasn't tied up she was gonna strangle me alive.

Six was the one to separate us. He shut me up with one look, the kinda look parents give their children when they're throwing a tantrum in public, and stopped Venom with a very cold line : “There is nothing to argue about. This is over.”

So Six untied Venom and teleported her away with shadows??? (I didn't know he could do that, for one moment my dense ass truly thought demons were taking her away or something 😭). Annd, like I expected, Venom left with threats of vengeance.

Things were a bit awkward after that. Both Six and I were emotionally tired. But I didn't want to just let him go and never see him again. He's a cool dude. Despite this mess, we really had a great time together. So I told him maybe we could hang out, as friends. And he agrees, but he does add that, for now, he doesn't want anything more than friendship. And I understand.

Boy, dating is tiring.

But I do cling on the “for now” and, who knows, maybe this will lead to dating?

Six left after that and Bud arrived later on in the evening. I decided it was better to explain everything that happened, especially since I didn't part on good terms with Venom. So I sat him down and told him everything.

I think Bud passed through every emotion possible, shock, confusion, disgust (for him dating a spider was a solid no), amusement annnd he burst out laughing when I told him I punched Venom in the face.

He told me it wasn't his intention to cause this mess, and he was just talking about his best friend, somehow the topic briefly went on his encounter with Six, and he didn't pay attention if anyone was listening. I told him to be more careful because I have a lot of enemies and I don't want to cause problems for Six.

All in all, things went… okay? I haven't heard of Venom since then, I'm sure she's plotting something, but Bud is aware of everything and I do think we can take whatever she plans for.

Six and I are still friends. I went on a tour with him recently to make him visit the city and my mountain. Things are mainly okay and now we're laughing about this crazy adventure.

Bud is also helping figure out a number of things. He told me taking tests on the internet is NOT the best way to figure out your sexuality. I wasn't aware of that. And I wasn't aware of all the possibilities and different types of sexuality too. So I'm also taking it slow, trying to figure things out.

Thank you guys for your support, I sent you a lot of monkey hugs.

Who knows maybe I'll turn back to this site again if another crazy thing happens in my life, I do tend to have a pretty intense life, guess that's the package that comes with being a LEGEND!

Monkey King out.

Wait, no, shit, ignore that last part I'm totally not the Monkey King.

[monody-monody]

I basically never post about any kind of (relation)shipping, mostly because my aro ass is oblivious and blind to most of it, but I just finished rewatching Stargate Atlantis, and...

What the heck happened!?

Okay so first I randomly came across a McKay-Sheppard ship post while I was mid-show and I was like "Really? Huh. Seems like a serious stretch; I don't see it, but you do you.", but then more and more scenes happened that made me realize like "Oh, no that actually works. It actually seems like that's what the writers were pushing for.". But then they do the whole McKay-Keller relationship thing even though they have NO CHEMISTRY WHATSOEVER. Meanwhile Ronon and Keller actually had a ton of chemistry and would've made a great couple, but instead they toss that aside and literally in the last five minutes of the final episode give him an unnamed girlfriend we've never seen before. WTF.

Here's how it should've gone: Sheppard and McKay. I don't care if they'd have to keep it to a Julian Bashir-Miles O'brien style bromance because it was 2008. Honestly I don't think either of them would be comfortable enough for an overt romance anyway, and there could totally still have been some great scenes of them confiding in eachother and providing emotional support within their established personalities and repartee. Ronon and Keller. Wow these two have a lot of sexual tension. But also the "big strong reckless type always getting into fights and getting injured + small normally skittish doctor who fiercely scolds them while treating their wounds and is somehow the only person who intimidates them" is always a very good dynamic. And the character who should get an extremely attractive girlfriend out of nowhere right at the end of the show? Radek.

[texanmarcusdavenport]

Mighty Med Headcanons

Gus

Gus is secretly a Perry. They have a lot in common: weird side character that shows up at the most (in)opportune moments, has an unrealistic variety of skills and resources, a past that's WAY too storied to be true yet somehow it is??, and obsessive behavior over their romantic interests (Perry with Douglas & Gus with Jordan). If they're not related, they'd 100% get along like a house on fire if they did meet.

Gus and Oliver are childhood friends of the "our parents forced us to hang out" variety. Oliver is GOBSMACKED that both his parents like Gus better than Kaz. Like. How??

Jordan

Jordan!! I <3 her. There’s a post going around on here that says she should've been in Elite Force instead of AJ & I 100% agree. She does seem like the type that'd be a surprisingly good hacker... and honestly I just really miss her :(

Her & Daniel(le) would get along. I have no proof I just know it. Troublemakers Inc(TM)

Kaz(imieras)

Pansexual & polyamorous. As long as everyone's having fun he's down for whatever

Transfem genderfluid, he/she/it. Starts by calling itself a woman/girl casually until Oliver's like. Kaz is there anything you want to tell me. & Kaz is like pfffft what no that's ridiculous ha ha Oliver I think I'd know if I was transgender. Then Kaz thinks about it & it's like. Damn it.

It/its pronouns also happen via jokes, she's just like. I'm like if a girl were a bug :) or perhaps a small mammal. Until someone calls her 'it' and she's like. Hm. Kinda slaps.

Doesn't even realize she has dysphoria, just starts acting & dressing more feminine when it suits her & 2 years later she's like. Huh. I haven't been avoiding mirrors lately. Wonder what that's about?

Combined-type ADHD

Dyslexic & dysgraphic. Only got through English by the Grace of God (Oliver). But I headcanon that other than spelling & syntax errors he's actually a great writer when he puts the effort in. He'd kill in public speaking but he'd never do that lol.

If she had a Normo job, it'd be firefighter

Oliver

Trans guy, he/him. He & Kaz are transmasc/transfem solidarity. His mom is more supportive than his dad.

OCD, anxiety, autistic. Gets all 3 from his parents which is part of the reason it took so long to get a diagnosis (both of them just thought getting crippling bouts of anxiety was normal).

Aroallo, specifically cupioromantic bisexual... this is so important to me you don't understand. Oliver is a very codependent character and I think learning to live on his own & not be jealous of his friends would be a great character arc for him.

He & Kaz r so fucking queerplatonic don't even get me started. Do Not Seperate Them.

Skylar Storm

Ace lesbian

She's an alien so I don't think she prescribes to human gender roles like. At all. So she's not really "trans" or "cis", but she does use she/xhe pronouns & mostly describe herself as a woman.

Futch Skylar... futch Skylar supremacy!! Has a sort of complicated relationship with presentation and whatnot, human femininity is sort of the norm for Skylarkind as a fashion trend. Xhe and Experion actually were both ostracized for their presentation (butch/trans Experion my beloved <3). I think xhe prefers more masculine dress but in fun styles and colors because, in her words, "practicality doesn't have to be boring".

Skylar Storm is essentially just a stage name, it started as anickname based on a very loose translation of xyr actual name.

Alan Diaz

Trans guy, any pronouns. Mostly because they're confused by language as a concept.

You know how its a running gag in MM that Horace never taught him how to count past eighty? That, but with language. Horace speaks Arabic, Old Castilian, & Mexican Spanish interchangeably so Alan grew up thinking that's just how people talk. Mix that with random alien languages &, well, they're incomprehensible on the best of days.

Doesn't know they're trans. Like they're trans obviously but if you told her that she wouldn't really understand.

Oliver: so you were, uh, born a girl but you're a boy now?

Alan: no, I'm a boy.

Oliver: yeah, obviously, but like, physically--

Alan: What Normo nonsense are you on about.

And it continues like that.

Polysexual, and if xe were married xe'd be a Wife Guy (positive).

[artdivadej]

Survivor’s Remorse (V)

Part 5

NSFW | 18+ | PTSD| Torture

Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8

I'd been sent to join the Victors Squad in the Capitol by Coin, not that the witch gave me much choice. It was obvious that she liked Peeta and despised me but wasn't sure he'd back her if it came to a vote of who to run a new Panem. I was the clear solution to that. Send the hijacked psycho to take him out because she can't control herself while so close to her torture chambers. The woman thought I was stupid but I didn't care. Anything to get some sun on my skin. Anything to breathe fresh air and get out of that fishbowl of a room I'd been locked in. 

When I'd been shoved out the back of the Humvee, I'd rolled onto the ground none too gently, but I was used to this type of treatment. I propel myself upwards using my bound hands beneath me, legs sliding out behind me in my usual protective crouch, right leg extended and left bent to my chest, hissing at the asshole who pushed me.

"You've gotta take her mouth guard off too Keil" Ryan sighs looking at him with annoyance

"I'm not going by that bitch's mouth. Let her new perfect Victors Squad take care of it" Keil snorts attempting to climb back in only for Ryan to block his path

"She's got a name. And she saved our asses. Twice. Show her some respect"

Keil looks like he'd love nothing more than to kick me again but he does eventually come closer and kneels in front of me, his curled lip conveying his distaste for me. I wish Ryan had been around for the first leg of this journey. Maybe Keil wouldn't have kicked me around so much if he had.

"If you bite me" he warns

"I doubt you'd taste any good" I snort, lisping around the mouth guard

"Pfft. Open your mouth"

I comply, having to fight the urge to gag when he roughly shoves the metal bar between my jaws, smirking at my look of disdain. I fight the urge to flinch, not wanting to be slammed onto my back again, as his hand comes towards my face. When he clicks them off, Keil holds them between his index finger and thumb with a grimace. I spit the bar out and flex my jaw, rolling my tongue over my teeth happily. I don't care how gross my saliva is to him I'm just happy to have control of my mouth again. He turns me around aggressively and shoves it into my bag before yanking me to my feet by my backpack strap. He and Ryan are behind me as we walk towards a large awning about a thousand feet ahead.

Then I see them and the blood in my veins freeze just like they do.

Katniss raises her bow, Gale his crossbow and the rest, their guns. Only Finnick remains leaning against one of the posts, appearing at ease while watching me with amusement. It's Peeta's eyes I find next and it makes my blood run cold. The realization slaps me in the face when I see there's not a weapon in his hands either and it's clear he's struggling not to come over to us. Coin really sent me here to die huh? No reason not to give the woman what she wanted I suppose. Who even was I really? No one of real importance now that my purpose had been served.

I hold up my cuffed hands as a sign of peace. Boggs comes over demanding to know what's happening. Keil shoves me forward with the butt of his gun so that I stumble toward them and I have to resist the urge to snap my jaws at him. This is humiliating enough. I don't need his fucking help in making it worse.

"Your problem now. Coins orders" he sighs happy to be rid of me

Should've let that fuckin pod kill him 2 days ago is what I should have done. Boggs assigns me a tent, telling me to set it up while he goes to confirm the order. Unlike Keil, his tone is soft like he's actually speaking to a person. Thankfully Keil and Ryan take their leave but I feel everyone's eyes on me, their weapons lowered but still in hand. Clearly, I'm not too well liked anywhere.

I move over to the outskirts of their tent circle and start trying to build mine off to the side of it. I'm aware no one will want to sleep near me. It's not personal. I'm just a fuckin wild nutcase and they're soldiers meant to be ready for anything. As the rope falls between my shackled nails again, I huff in frustration, knowing this was going to take most of the day.

I'm still sitting off the to the side fumbling with my tent around my cuffs clumsily when I hear a crunch behind me. My eyes sweep up fast as I slide my leg around in a circle out behind me so I'm back in my defensive crouch. They land on a smiling Finnick, his blue-green eyes twinkling happily, unlike everyone else's that only watched me with distrust and fear. I quickly relax and smile back at him, genuinely pleased to see him. Finnick was used to psychotic people, there was no judgement in his eyes as he knelt beside me, wordlessly helping me with my knots.

"Thanks Finn" I sigh once it's all set up not noticing his smile at my slip of the familiar nickname

"My pleasure. How you settling in?"

"Aside from everyone here wanting to slit my throat the moment I close my eyes? Peachy" I roll my eyes

"That's not true"

"Of course it is. Coin clearly has an agenda sending me here. I don't expect to make it back to 13" I shrug honestly "I'm fully aware this is the last stop on my Victors Tour"

I feel the traitorous tears burn the backs of my eyes; my throat raw as I shake my head to clear it. I feel resentment and self-loathing well in my chest. It pisses me off. I bite down on the core of my restraints giving a tentative suck. Finnick watches me curiously for a moment, allowing me to release it undisturbed. My body slumps a little against his, head lolling heavily on his shoulder. I can't help it. The sedative is quick acting, not as potent as it used to be, thankfully. I don't care that my sudden chomp has startled everyone or that I can feel them watching me warily because I'm so close to Finnick's neck. Finnick appears to be truly unbothered by my proximity or my antics.

"Like it's my fault I'm mind fucked" I hiss under my breath

"I have no plans of you dying as long as there's breath in my body"

"Thanks Finn but I'd rather you stick around for lil red. Wasn't exactly a cake walk bringing her to you"

"I hear you did a lot more than just protect her"

"Doesn't matter." I shrug

At least I made sure that someone walked away from this knowing and understanding what love is. Who they were. Knowing that when they need to break, they actually have the pieces to put themselves back together again. That was enough.

"It does to me" he shakes his head, leaning his cheek against the top of my hair

"Just be good to her. I tried too damn hard to bring her back to you in one piece for you not to"

"It's a promise"

I'm sleepy but I can't relax with all these eyes on me. I need a distraction.

Finnick taps at my cuffs curiously, so I lift them high for him to see. Beetee has made this set another pretty shade of blue to match the collar on my neck and the mouthguard now in my tent. My nails are covered because it'd been two weeks since I'd been around Prim to have them cut so they were sharp again.

"Doesn't it hurt you to bite these?"

"No. Beetee has put a sedative in them for me, right here" I drop my wrists so the cuff's center sits in his palm

It's fatter at the center with two matching holes on either side a soft orange, they glowed in the center.

"For when I feel myself losing control. After...I lost it at breakfast with you guys. He made me a new mouth guard too"

"I wouldn't call you attempting to air dirty laundry, losing it" Finnick chuckles handing me a sugar cube "It'll help wake you up a little"

One day I'd find out where he kept those stored.

"You weren't there...after. Totally lost my shit after I remembered some stuff about the Training Center. Johanna had to knock me out"

   ***

Haymitch interrupts at this. He'd come in after the fact but had never been told just what had set me off. He never pried. Always let me tell him things on my own time and the way I wanted. Another thing I genuinely love about my adopted father.

"What happened at breakfast? You never did tell me"

Peeta is shaking his head against the top of mine but he doesn't stiffen the way he did then. We've talked about this. Haymitch and I haven't. I take a deep breath and start in on that one. Might as well get some of the trackerjacker enhanced mutt version of me's memories out now before they threatened to smother me at the Capitol. Because I was going. I'll be damned if I spend that amount of time away from Peeta and they both knew it.

"I was cruel to everyone that day" I admit honestly shaking my head with shame "Most especially Peeta. I wanted him to hurt the way I was...even though I didn't understand it at the time. Still shattered beyond repair"

    ***

I was fucking starving and sick of waiting for Prim to go get some food. They'd finally actually had to adjust my food to meet my carnivorous needs and I was ravenous. I'd been allowed to walk around my room unrestrained and even get some sketching done this morning to test my motor reflexes further. They took my pencil immediately afterwards though. Prim was unusually late today, must have been put back in the rotation this week.

Yeah, screw this I'm starved.

I threw my pillow at the glass and demanded my shock collar so I could get some god damn food. It was still early hours so I was usually permitted to eat there with Prim because there were so few people there, already out for whatever work detail they were on that day.

Within 10 minutes two familiar soldiers came in. They knew better than to have my watch be men. They learned that lesson quick when I would tuck myself into places they could never hope to fit or reach. I'm much too wily and quick for their bulky bodies. These particular women were used to me and I liked that they didn't look at me like everyone else that was forced to watch me did. There was no pity in their eyes and they were genuine in trying to understand me.

The blonde was Flira. She didn't talk much but was the reason I'd been able to get my collars crafted by Beetee. She listened to me when I'd been a screaming lunatic those first couple weeks. It was clear I still trusted some people irrevocably. Beetee was on that very short list. Apparently Flira was a pretty high-ranking officer so she spent a bit of time with him for weaponry. Why she enjoyed spending time babysitting me was beyond my realm of reasoning. She'd attempted to put in a favor but he claimed I'd saved his life. Quite the opposite in fact, but I appreciated the sentiment all the same.

Now, since the last problems were my hands and teeth, a small jolt of electricity or a shot of morphling could stop that in a second. Much better than getting knocked unconscious with a baton again. I was grateful for them. They were pretty and functional without making me feel like the wild fox they'd wickedly dubbed me at the Training Center. Much thanks Beetee. A girls gotta have something pretty even if she was a monster mutt now.

In the red head Juni's hand was my collar and mouth guard.

Ok I hated the mouth guard. The way they'd strap me down to put it in always gave me flashbacks to my torment. It made me feel like less of a person to them too. Just some caged wild animal. I already had to wear the collar, was the muzzle fuckin necessary for breakfast?

I didn't realize I'd said this all aloud until they exchanged a bored glance between them before passing it back to a nurse who'd been nervously waiting at the door for me to be restrained. I shoot Juni a grateful smile and hold my hands out for my special restraints. My nails had been modified to always grow in a stiletto shape but Prim kept them rounded and short so I didn't have to wear the nail guards much. Today Juni leaves them off as she clips my adjustable restraints into place at my wrists.

Today's looking up! Gotta keep up the docile thing so it can stay that way. Lifting my chin obediently, I allow Flira to brush the hair from my neck as she secures the collar in place.

This one is a beautiful shade of blue that makes my head heart thinking about why I like it so much. Beeta making my restraints really makes me happy. They're personal, he cares that anything made for you is for you. I wish I could see how he was doing. Maybe if I behave today, I can ask? Pfft yeah right. He was important. I really wasn't.

I do hope I get to catch a glimpse of Johanna. I haven't gotten to talk to her in a while. I need to see her alright with my own eyes. Hopefully they were treating her right. I didn't want her caged and hurting like me. She'd had too much of it for my liking as it was. She was a bird that needed to be free in the trees, like Rue. They just flew through leaves as if they had wings, weightless and filled with sweet air. To think of her trapped in a white room like this, a two-way mirror for people to gawk and laugh at your misery. No, I wanted sun on her skin. It clicks that I have my bargaining chip. I have something I want from Coin now. Now we can negotiate.

"Ok, ok, ok I'm all cuffed up can we go? I'm starving!" I moan shaking my wrists back and forth as I bounce on the balls of my socked feet excitedly

"You have got to wear pants today." Flira sighs pinching the bridge of her nose as Juni takes the sedative shots from the nurse and shoos her skittish presence away. They always irritate her and this pleases me.

I'm not too keen on clothing but since I rarely get to leave my cage, it's not really that much of a problem. I wrinkle my nose but snatch up a pair of 13's ugly pants I'd shredded into shorts.

"No. Coin will kill you"

I snort and pull them up my legs, admiring how they make my fattening ass look.

"Not if she wants her precious mutt to cooperate" I sing throwing her an impish grin over my shoulder.

They roll their eyes at me but resign to let me stay shoeless and hurry me to the cafeteria, probably hoping we can get this over with quickly before their caught being so nice to me. I don't know why they risk it but I like that they were willing to get in trouble just to give me back some simple freedoms sometimes. Luckily for them it's practically empty but I don't really peruse the area. Not important right now. The smell of meat smacks me in the face making my mouth water instantly. Flashing my bracelet when the cook comes out, I practically drool at the meal he drops in front of me a minute later. 1 full turkey leg, a chicken thigh, and some beef soup that I can see vegetables floating in. My nose wrinkles at this. There's a cup of fruit that also makes me visibly gag.

Maybe I'll be able to convince Juni or Flirn to eat them? Food is too precious in 12 to waste but in 13 its practically a war crime. I wish they'd just stop giving them to me for a while. I take my cup and then seek out an empty table just happy to have my fill of meat.

Then I hear a booming, hearty laugh that makes my heart pound and my muscles constrict as if I'd been ensnared by a vicious anaconda. I know that laugh. Then, I see them.

It's the mutt sitting to the left of Katniss with Gale at her right. Finnick Odair is beside Gale, Annie tucked into his side, smiling adorably at whatever he's whispering in her ear. My eyes lock onto the cozy trio that Is the mutt, Katniss and Gale. His arm brushes hers occasionally as they speak to one another and I feel a thick disgusting jealousy welling in my throat that burns me to the core.

I don't know why I care so much but it pisses me off.

The bench of their table closest to me is full of heads I recognize too. Yulin on the end is sitting beside Delly, both District 12 residents. It's with a giddiness starting in my belly that fills me up with pure joy when I find exactly who I wanted to see beside Delly,

"Jojo!" I call out excitedly

Her head whips up as she drops the spoon in her hand, her growing curls make me grin as they bounce around her whipping face. It's Peeta who looks up first, seeing Johanna respond to a name that was most definitely not hers. When his eyes lock on mine I feel fear, hatred, jealousy and....longing well in my chest as his face frantically searches mine. It's Katniss' hand on his shoulder, trying to see what's got his attention that drives my feet forward. When Johanna turns around, I'm grinning wickedly down at her.

"I see they let you out your cage for once" she beams back

"For a little while. I can't sit without your permission though" I explain tilting my head behind me where I know Flirn and Juni will most definitely be hovering.

"Are those shorts?" she cackles

"No one was supposed to be here" I shrug, privately enjoying the way everyone's eyes roam up my exposed thighs, littered with fading bruises and wounds from my imprisonment.

I like that I can feel all of their terrified and confused eyes on us while we pay them no mind. All these scars? I earned every single one of them to protect all of their precious people. So... Fuck them.

Everyone else was all the things in this moment that I'd been for over 6 months.

Irrelevant. Discardable.

"Sit. Sit" Johanna pats the seat excitably and I plop down happily.

Flirn and Juni relax and give me a nice berth of space. I've talked to them a bit about my imprisonment time with Johanna. They know she can subdue me, if necessary and that I would welcome her over anyone else knocking me senseless. Or Primrose. But she's not available today.

I sweep my eyes up the table where Annie sits, openly staring at me with those wide jade green eyes, that seemed much clearer today. Good. She's finding her way with Finnick as her sound minded compass.

"Hey lil red" I grin, pleased to see her still unharmed. "You're lookin good"

"I am. Thank you for that. How are you?", she nods softly with a smile

This startles everyone at the table as they look back and forth between us.

"Meh so so. Best place I've been strapped down in thus far though" I laugh

Johanna snickers beside me and I'm pleased to see she's reaching for my fruit cup. After she dumps it into hers, I bump my forehead to her temple in thanks. She knocks back and I smile to myself. Jo knows I can't stand the sight of vegetables right now and she needs the fattening up anyway.

When I look up and a little to my right it's to lock eyes with Peeta. I'd wanted him to feel like I didn't care he was in close enough range to wring my neck with those big old paws of his or that I was truly terrified of him. I didn't want him to know that seeing him cuddled up with this girl made me want to rip my heart out and throw it at his feet.

I'm angry and I shouldn't be. I don't like this boy. Right? I don't want him. Right?

RIGHT?!

I look back at my food and pull another large hunk of meat of my turkey leg up with my nails, (I hate silverware) and can feel everyone's eyes on me, but it only makes me angrier. They want a show I'll fucking give them one.

"That's a lot of meat" Delly inserts quirking her brow at me inquisitively.

"Gotta catch up. They didn't exactly give us much to snack on when they were shocking our wet bodies with cattle prods" I explain in a bored tone as Johanna snorts next to me.

Annie flinches at the end of the table but I don't pay it any mind. She was fine. Safe and unharmed. I took great lengths and many an unwelcome touch to see to that. You're fuckin welcome Odair.

"But why meat?"

"All they gave me were vegetables the entire time I was there. The only protein was an egg a week. I need more protein than most" I explain to her genuine curiosity, seeing no harm in being nice to this doe eyed girl who honestly meant me none.

"Why?" Gales asks curiously, his stormy dark grey eyes looking me over like a science experiment

For fucks sake I'm wearing a collar. Does it need more explanation? I quirk a brow at him and pull my top lip back from my left canine since it was closest to his range of vision, fattening it a bit before tapping it twice. I hear everyone's gasps of surprise seeing I can change their size at will but I don't speak on it further. It's the only explanation I care to offer at the moment. I can feel them burning with questions but they dare not ask.

I dip my meat in the soup, making a spectacle of it as they all continue to watch me. A strange sideshow to their normally quaint mornings being all coupled up and fucking happy. Picture perfect fuckin families. Something that mind fucked little ole me wasn't supposed to live to see.

"So" I start, wanting to wound them the way they were me

My eyes sweep up to hold the mutt in my gaze, he's spell bound as I suck the soaked meat from my fingers and between my lips with a loud pop. I lick and suck the juices from my lips torturously slow and see that I have the rapt attention of every male at the table. Hmmm. Interesting. Even as a wild animal I was still desirable to them. Funny.

I rip off another large piece of meat and repeat this process. I hadn't had this much meat in so long. I was doing it just as much for them as I was for me.

"I see that you three figured out the poly dynamic to your re-lation-ship" I grin wickedly gesturing the meat between Gale, Katniss and Peeta before slurping it between my lips again, making sure to draw out the 'ship' when I pop my lips playfully.

As Katniss goes red in the face, sputtering for a response I lock my eyes with Peeta again, who looks as if I'd slapped him and he was trying to decide whether to hit me back. My fingers twitch as I try to control myself. I want to lunge for him before he can me but I decide to push further. Johanna snorts next to me trying to hide her amusement at my unhinged behavior. I bring what's remaining of the turkey leg up to my mouth to show them something I'd learned I could do with this new set of teeth and jaws the Capitol forced on me after my first games.

"So, Katniss" I hiss her name like a vicious snake. "Which ones better in the sack?"

Delly squeaks something about privacy and misunderstandings but I'm not looking at her. I'm looking right at Peeta, who's eyes have hardened. He genuinely looks wounded. Good. I hope she says Gale.

"Cuz if memory serves me right Mellark, you're quite a fun ride. And taste just. Like. Honey" I purr

Before he can retort I stick the entire leg in my mouth, clamp my teeth down and suck hard, my cheeks dipping so you can see my tongue hitting them as I swirl it around the leg. I pull it out painfully slowly and everyone's eyes widen. I've stripped it of every shred of meat on it, the tip of the bone leaving my full lips with a loud pop as I look him dead in his eyes and swallow. No need to chew if I don't want to honestly. I pop my lips with satisfaction and suck on the tip of the bone. Katniss looks like she'd love nothing more than to drive her fork through my face and I use this as satisfying fuel for my rage.

Serves you right. I volunteered for you and kept your precious mutt safe because he's so fuckin in love with you.

"I bet it's Gale and he's aggressive" Johanna whispers lowly in my ear so no one but me can hear

"How about it pretty boy? Is it you? I bet you're pretty demanding though" I tilt my head as I suck on the tip of my bone thoughtfully, rolling my tongue over the cartilage remaining at the tips. Gale's eyes are still on my lips and I taunt him further, beginning to suck it thoughtfully. "Hmmm might just need to test it out myself. Not like you were ever shy about handing out those kisses of yours back in 12 though, were ya?"

Gale flushes as many of the eyes at the table now sweep up to him.

"My bad about kickin you in the sack last time you tried though. I won't do that if you try to kiss me again" I purr dropping my bone and tipping my soup up to my lips, taking a sip. I drop it immediately when I smell carrots at my nose my entire taunting game discarded until I get them away from me.

I rapidly scoop them out into the empty fruit cup I had and hurriedly drop them on Johanna's plate. She dumps them in her soup happily, still watching our exchange.

I'm just getting fucking started.

"I mean. You obviously don't mind sharing?" I flick my eyes to Katniss and back again to Gale

"What makes you think you and Peeta have?" she sneers trying and succeeding to wound me, though I'll never let her know that.

I smirk, my canines on full display and this makes her pull herself back an inch or so protectively. I take a bite out of my chicken thigh and lick my fingers as if her question bores me. Just as I move to say what I want, Prim sits beside Peeta, who now has to slide directly in front of me.

I can't avoid his deep honey gaze any longer and I feel my veins thrum in warning. I don't want to be malicious with Primrose here. But now I feel I've gone to a point where I need to see this through. I genuinely need these answers for some psychotic reason. My foot rests between both of Peeta's under the table and a horrid idea comes to mind.

Let's see if I'm provoked.

With a tap to my temple, I simper at Peeta, biting my lip while gazing at him longingly beneath the lashes of my hooded eyes, feigning a desire that I genuinely felt licking the back of my consciousness.

"Hijacked or not, I've got quite a few nights on the train up here. And hmmmm...If memory serves, Mellark's fuckin hung" I sigh dreamily

He's about to get up, something in his expression tickles a memory of his mannerisms. I see it in the set of his jaw and the sadness in the tightening of his eyes. I stop him cold with my next action. My socked foot is now on his groin. I'd noticed he'd anxiously scooted to the edge of his seat while he'd watched me eat, his hands now palming the table with veins popping across the surface. His body is frozen solid. Good.

"And very, very vocal. Though not very nice in what he's saying" I sigh rubbing my foot tenderly against him back and forth, feeling a sense of triumph when he grows beneath my ministrations. This sickens me that I revel in his heat being directed at me this way. "Likes to let you take control so he can watch you too"

Desire sparks within me at his expressions. This mutt who wants me dead. The hell is wrong with me?

Katniss hisses and stomps away from the table, fed up with my shit.

"Then again" I sigh with fervor sweeping my eyes down to Finnick, who is watching me with something akin to utter disbelief but...humor rests on his lips "I do believe you owe me Annie"

Her head snaps to me and now Finnick is really lost.

"I bet you're the best at this table Odair. And seeing as how your pretty little wife does owe me my pound of flesh..." I moan the end of my sentence, just to goad them too.

I'm lashing out at everyone now.

I find Peeta's tip and squeeze, wrapping my toes around it, feeling his hips shift as he tries to control his reaction. I like this. Why? His plump lips part as he pants lowly, his hands are under the table on his thighs now. He could move my foot easily if he wanted but he doesn't recoil from my touch or move to toss my foot away.

This confuses me. I feel a crack in my mind but I don't have time to focus on that.

"What do you mean?" Finnick asks

"Oh, you didn't know?" Johanna pipes in always happy to traumatize people with Our 'Torture Tales' as we liked to call them. "She convinced them in less than a day that Annie would be of no use to them. Everything they wanted to do and try on Annie, she got them to take it out on her instead. The head Peacekeeper there had a thing for redheads but, she mind-fucked him into touching her instead"

Peeta flinches under my ministrations, I'd increased the pressure while he was staring at my face intently. But I don't want to see the disgust I know will be on his. I know I'm sullied beyond reproach, ok? Now both of my feet are on him but his trembling hands have moved to the tabletop again. Why didn't he just move my feet? And why was I happy he couldn't seem to?

"Is that true?" Prim asks me with sad blue eyes

"Mhhhmmm. So, I think I dare, Mr.Odair. It would seem I've got a thing for hot blondes hopelessly in love with someone else" I sing locking eyes with him, happy that these memories don't come back as easily as I spit them out. "We're used to it right? The Capitol just using our bodies how they want to? At least I'd be fun. You wouldn't believe the things I learned my body could do in there"

Peeta has had enough. So have the Odairs. And Johanna. Her hand is like a vice grip on my thigh, warning me to calm down. I didn't want to hurt Annie but I felt rabid and couldn't bring myself to care. I'd taken more than enough lashings for her; she could take one emotional for me.

Peeta's still hard beneath me but his hands slam on the table and I flinch backwards with my eyes on them. Now I'm the one frozen in place. They might as well be sledgehammers in my rattled mind. My own begin to tremble as I grab Johanna's hand in fear beneath the table. Ok maybe too far? He stands and his wounded eyes are hard as they hold me trapped in fear and something else.

"I don't know what you think happened on the train but that wasn't it", he hisses before retreating from the table.

He's a liar. He's definitely fucking hung. There's no way they'd just know that. Right? Or would I just know that?

No. The games. He had to have washed. Right?

Ugh. My head is spinning.

It's quiet for a little while after the Odair's, Gale and Peeta leave. I realize Prim has been watching me with the eyes of a doctor who wants to ask me things but not in front of people who don't have my confidence. Delly takes the hint and removes herself quickly. For some reason unknown to me, she touches my shoulder and gives a soft squeeze before leaving, knowing that touching me was not permitted. It was reassuring she cared enough to risk it.

Yulin finishes his food than comes to sit beside me for a minute. We were actually pretty close before I went into the games so I was happy to see he made it out. Friendship wasn't something that came easily to me. When his blue eyes hold mine, I realize he has something he wants to say without upsetting me.

"What?" I sigh ready for a lecture

"Look...I'm still friends with Peeta too. I know you don't like him right now but, don't just assume things. He's never...been with anyone before. I don't know what they did to your memories but he's never had sex" he sighs standing to go and fleeing the room quickly.

This only makes me angrier and I'm struggling to hold onto my reason.

I didn't need my heart to leap the way it did at the admission and breaking of Peeta's trust to give it to me. My head hurts.

"Why did you do that?" Prim asks amicably

"I-I don't know. I was so pissed off" I hiss gnawing at my chicken, no longer able to taste it but needing something to do before I splintered into a million pieces.

"About?"

"I can't explain it"

And I don't want to.

"Try" Johanna urges me threading her fingers through mine and squeezing twice, just like we did when we were imprisoned together. My little boost of dopamine in a world full of trackerjacker venom.

"I went through all this for him to have the life he wanted but I hated seeing it. But I hate him. Right? It's all so splintered" I sigh rubbing my temples now "I'm terrified of him. I just have this irrational fear but I wanted to touch him too. Fuck. I'm super fucked in the head. I want him dead. He wants me dead. Right? But I want his hands on me too? How could the train have been unreal? It's so clear. Bright. So bright"

"What about the train?" Prim tries knowing that trying convince me he didn't want me dead was a moot point.

"He and I... we would" I sigh, not wanting to express this to a 13-year-old, but she was the only doctor I trusted right now.

"You have memories of intimacy?"

"Sometimes" I huff as my body begins to shudder

"Only one time isn't super shiny like that but...we didn't..."

"This sounds juicy, tell me" Johanna hums leaning forward and resting her chin on her hands as she grins mischievously at me.

We'd always make one another laugh in some morbid fashion when we were imprisoned together and one of us was on the brink. I could have never endured all that I did without her.

"I didn't sleep well without him after the games...so, I never did" I sigh pulling my hands from my temples and holding Prim's clear blue eyes, drowning in their clarity

"And?"

"One night, I remember waking up to his lips on my cheek. I'd been crying out for him. I... I think I did that a lot. He curled up with me. Held me. He smelled different than the Peeta in the bright version.... like honey. Cinnamon"

"Like the bakery"

"Yes. Bread. Fresh bread"

This scares me. I'm getting too many at one time. Prim urges me on encouragingly.

"I wanted him to do more than hold me but I know it's not right to"

"Did he?" Johanna whispers conspiratorially as her pretty green eyes widened dramatically

"He's gotten...bigger than he was in the videos I remember. But he was always bigger than me. I wanted him to kiss me. I don't know why. He didn't love me. The cameras were gone. What did I want?" I grumble as my eyes dart back and forth across the table

"Oh my god bitch, did he kiss you or not?" Johanna whines

"Yes" I sigh as I feel my body clenching in a way that feels very familiar

"Keep going" Johanna purrs wiggling her shoulders

"He was on top of me. His tank tops always got swallowed by his muscles and his hands were" I stare down at mine "He always held my hands. He did it than too. His kiss was so passionate and he was everywhere" I whisper rubbing my temples again

I don't like that I can feel the heat of his body encompassing me or the tenderness in his kiss. This bothers me. Fuckin mutt. 

So desperate to have a piece of him, that I just let him take out his frustrations for Katniss with me. Telling me how pretty she was as he thrust into me so roughly. That was the truth. That's what happened. Right?

"He's got some big ass hands" Johanna observes

"But gentle in this one. I remember his hands on my ribs, my hips, his lips tasted like hot chocolate. He always...had some before bed on the train. I think?"

"That's really good, keep going" Prim presses

I don't want to. I can feel the golden haze trying to overtake this memory too. I tell her so.

"Why?"

"I hear things he's saying but it doesn't really sound like him. Like a track over the real words that don't quite match up to his lips."

"Listen to both. Figure out which one makes sense" Prim encourages

"He’s telling me that it's easy to forget Katniss with me because I had grey eyes and dark hair like her. These kisses are rougher though. He's tugging and pushing at me. He's rough and won't really look me in the eyes. They're off somehow but it's his voice. His body. It doesn't feel good for me but he likes it so I shut up like he says. His hands are on my wrists. Not in mine"

"What's the darker one saying?"

"He's calling me pretty. Sweet names. Whispering in my ear. He's holding my hands this time" I blush wanting to drop the topic now

It didn't make sense.

"Did you fuck in this one too? I like this one better" Johanna whispers practically in my lap now

"No. I... I touched him. He touched me, a little. That was it"

"Oh no, how much touching? Don't hold out on me now. I hate to read and this is a juicy story" Johanna whines as she shakes me

Maybe I'd make better progress with Johanna around when it came to my real memories? She made them easier to remember and fun even through the confusion and pain.

"Jojo maybe later" I hiss ignoring the creeping headache

Prim was still only 13 and it bothers me that she knows this much already.

"I don't mind" Prim laughs

"I do"

"Just keep going"

"I was determined not to, no matter how badly I wanted to. So, I asked to touch him instead"

His lips are on mine and the sounds that rumble in his wide barrel chest make me wet. He's so vocal as he showers me with praise between suckling at my tongue and lips. It makes my muscles clench in ways that set me ignites fire in my veins. I don't know how but he knows exactly how to suck on my tongue to make me weak. It's as if he has a roadmap to every sensitive part of me. He whimpers my name against my lips when my nails rake down his chest with desire. His lips leave mine as he throws his head back with a groan, hurriedly pulling the shirt over his head.

"Peeta" I whisper

His eyes meet mine, just holding them for a moment before he dips his head and gives me a tender kiss. His hands are on my ribs as he caresses my sides.

"Can I touch you Peeta?" I whisper into the night, my back bowing when his fingertips graze the underside of my breasts.

His eyes widen but he nods, his curls falling into his eyes as he tried to steady his breath. I want to see him come undone so I pull him down to me with my left arm around his neck and my right hand sliding through his golden happy trail. When his skin touches mine, I lay on my side, pulling him down so that he lay on his facing me. I could see him struggling not to flex his hips up into my descending fingers because his eyes never leave mine. He whispers how pretty I am as he pants against my lips, his voice unsteady and a low hum. I blush and kiss him to shut him up before I lose my nerve. As my fingers pass through the patch of curls, I wonder if they match the dirty blonde on his head. This becomes a fleeting thought when his length twitches against the side of my palm. I grab him gently at first, curious of his reactions to every touch and caress. He's pulsing in my hand as I explore his shaft in my hands. Peeta has no problem telling me exactly how he feels and I find that I really like that.

"Shit!" I hiss slamming my forehead down on the table before I feel Johanna's restraining arms wrapped around my shoulders to keep me upright

No. Mutt. Mutt. Enemy. He's going to destroy everything. But of course, me first. This isn't real. He'd never look at me that way. Never touch me so tenderly. He'd told me so.

He hated me for this fake relationship but I felt good wrapped around him so it was alright sometimes. His hands go to my throat when I ask him to slow down. He's hurting me. I go quiet but he's not finished yet. That was the real Peeta. Right?

RIGHT!?

My hand locks around Johanna's thigh in a grip that I know will leave a bruise. I'll apologize later. She doesn't flinch or move away; in fact, she moves closer so I can whisper in her ear.

"Se...date" I grit between pants

"Prim" she warns lowly trying not to alert my guards who've noticed the loud bang

Prim's hand is already on the remote. I feel the prick in my neck and I slump against Johanna's side with exhaustion. My doses are higher when I'm supposed to be around others. I want to sleep. But I can't. Not with these memories waging war in my brain.

"What the fuck? It was getting good!" Johanna hisses with mock irritation

I can't help the laugh that I choke out.

"Too good. I started to remember...the Training Center when I pull that one back up"

"Which part?" she snorts

"Mean Peeta" I whimper shrinking into her side feeling like a stupid child "Cliff too"

"Hey..." she calls lowly in a soft tone I've realized she only uses for me

I tilt my head up to hers with as much strength as I can muster, unashamed to show her my shiny eyes.

"Unless he's a quick pumper, which isn't exactly far off" she starts which makes me laugh brokenly "There's no way he actually got to you, y'know? Snow promised you to him after the interview. You fucked that up warning Peeta about the attack on 13. After Snow knocked you out, they brought you back in not ten minutes later. We were rescued a half a day later. They were on the frontlines. No one came to fuck with us in that time. I stayed up the whole time. I watched you the whole time."

"You broke your promise?"

"If you thought I really wasn't gonna need to look at your crazy ass when they brought you back, you're stupid. I know what Cliff does to the women POWs. I had to make sure you were breathing. They left you strapped down in front of my cell just like you said they would. When the grid dropped after they got bombed, I even managed to pull you into my cell before the power came on. I swear”

"It was cold"

"They took your clothes. They knew how much you love the things Cinna makes. And to make me think that you had been given to Cliff for a little while before they shipped out. I'm not dumb though. He likes to slice and beat a girl up before he can get his rocks off. You weren't bruised enough. Looked like they just beat you pretty good for the warning"

"You're lying" I begin to sob

"To you? For what? Your minds fucked enough as it is. I'd like no hand in that shit" she laughs and I join in, wrapping arms around her slowly filling out stomach

"Thanks for staying with me. I wouldn't have made it without you" I sigh sleepily, fighting my drooping lids

"Don't I know it" she smirks down at me, knocking her forehead against mine "Good. Your old man's here. Gonna need him to cart you off to bed. That meat's making you chunky"

"Good" I snicker

Prim has waves over Haymitch, who was looking for an excuse to ditch his next meeting anyway, asking him to carry me back to my room. More like my zoo exhibit cage. Johanna helps me turn on the seat, loosely wrapping my arms around his neck and back as he carries me piggyback to my room.

"Nice bruise on the forehead there darlin" he laughs around a lollipop.

A new guilty pleasure of his that helps distract him from the no alcohol rule down here. That rule definitely fuckin bites. I'd love a good drink right now.

"Had to hit something" I shrug with a yawn

"I take it you saw Peeta"

"I don't want to talk about it. My head hurts. Maybe later. I just have to sort it all out for a while first"

He hums but says nothing further as he waves his band in front of my cage to open the door. Once he sets me on the bed, he helps turn my body so I'm lying back against the pillows.

"Go ahead. I know they want you to strap me down"

"And since when have I given a shit about what other people want me to do?" he asks with a quirked brow

"True"

I roll onto my side and watch him as he sits in the chair beside the bed. It's usually occupied by the moron of a head doctor here.

"Can you stay with me until I fall asleep?"

"Of course"

I snuggle further into my blanket and just watch his chest rise and fall as he pulls a book out of his jacket and begins to read to himself.

"I'm fucked, aren't I?"

"Aren't we all?"

"You know what I mean"

"Do I?"

"My mind. There's no real helping this level of psychosis is there?"

"And what level is that?"

I hated when he answered my questions with questions like this.

"To see someone as a monster...but still want those same hands on you. No matter how terrified you are of the fact that you know they're meant to kill you. You want them anyway. Knowing it means your death. To find comfort in the arms of death?"

"Is that the crossroad you're at right now?"

"Yeah. I don't feel safe anymore. I don't know if I ever have, outside of the fractured memories that tell me I did with him. They hurt. It all hurts. What am I even still here for?"

We're quiet for a while before I begin to sob. I bawl so hard my bed rocks violently beneath me, my body releasing what I hadn't been able to in the last 6 months.

"I wish they'd killed me" I cry finally admitting to Haymitch the one thing I hadn't been able to admit to myself aloud "I can't live like this. Broken and fractured beyond repair! No one deserves to live as a shell. A ghost. A monster mutt terrified of other mutts!"

He doesn't say a word but his arms are around me in seconds, scooping me up, pulling me into the armchair so I'm sitting sideways in his lap. My sobs have only gotten harder and I'm barely breathing through them.

"That is not what you are! Do you hear me? You feel this way because you know that's not who you are! You feel her fighting, clawing desperately to get out from beneath the rubble of fucked up things that the Capitol dropped on you" Haymitch rumbles giving me a reassuring squeeze. "How about this? Everyone always wants you to pull your memories. How about we listen to some of my more sober ones of who you really are?"

"Yeah" I nod with a sniffle

So, he begins his tales. The more he talks the deeper I fall into the dream of living this girl's life as he describes her. The fire. The passion. Quickest to throw myself into the flames if it meant keeping those I claimed never to care for, away from harm. Alone since 8 but surviving on my own since 10. Preferring to keep to the woods, when possible, never was one to enjoy wearing pants. She didn't sound very nice but she was kind, passionate and strong.

I dreamt of her. In a field of dandelions, singing to the mockingjays above her head. The only times she ever felt free as a child.

***

"Ah. I always wondered what had happened" Haymitch nods before smirking at me

"That was not one of my finest moments" I scoff

"Sounded like one to me. You felt things you weren't ready to and tackled it head on anyway. Albeit, aggressively as hell but, you did it. Now, teasing the boys while you made your point? Stroke of genius" Haymitch chuckles

"I didn't even mean what I was saying. Like, Finn's cute and all, but in that annoying big brother kind of way. It's why I needed to apologize. I was trying to hurt everyone because I was hurting and couldn't figure out how to deal with it at the time. Nothing I was feeling made sense and it terrified me. It wasn't fair but I did it. It's why I had to say sorry"

"I can respect that"

"Finn's cute?" Peeta repeats above my head having apparently only heard that part of my spiel.

I shrink into his chest a little and nudge his chin up with the top of my head. Trackerjacker me tended to lean on Finnick a lot so we bonded quickly. I'd spent a lot of time with him. He was always nice to me even when I was losing my marbles. Even when I'd tried to kill Peeta again in the Capitol, he was soft in his tone and gentle in his handling of me even when I didn't know who or where I was. Used to it I suppose.

I later learned that it always stroked the beast of jealousy's back within Peeta back then.

"And Peeta is drippin wet, panty droppa, smoking hot”  I grin over at Haymitch knowing that Peeta is bright red above me.

He coughs and Haymitch hands me another clear liquor bottle to sip from.

"Finish about when you joined the squad at the Capitol" Peeta chokes

I try to ignore that he's dipped his chin so his lips are beside my neck and his left hand has released mine to trail back and forth across my waist line. I launch back into the memory before his hands distract me with hunger.

[thoughts-on-bangtan]

Taehyung's beautiful "Rainy Days" (Song Analysis)

*taps mic* is this thing on?

Well...it's been a while, hasn't it? We've been silent but we are still very much around, still listening to the Tannie's music, watching all the content, still loving vmin and namjin, we watched all streamable D-Day concerts, the Disney+ movies, all of it, we've just basically been keeping our ARMY time to ourselves.

But then came Tae.

But then came Rainy Days. And we were lured back here to scream a little at what we've gotten.

And yes, before the inevitable anons come to try and discredit everything in this post, yes we are aware that (so far) Tae doesn't have any writing credits on the songs on Layover, Love Me Again and Rainy Days. But try as you might, no one can ignore just how vmin coded Rainy Days is and how specific some of the references are. Everyone picked up on it, regardless if they were a vminie, OT7 non-shipper, or even a xkooker. Posts crying about and pointing toward Park Jimin being the one were everywhere and honestly, I've missed moments like there.

So, Rainy Days, huh, let's talk about the vmin references, shall we?

First of all, can we talk about just how gorgeous and atmospheric Rainy Days is? And how very Taehyung it is? Because it just fits him truly so perfectly, just like Love Me Again does. I love how the soft mellowness of the song contrasts with the brutalistic architecture of the building shown in the MV, the old-school iMac, and the little Pomeranian acting as Yeontan. I did get tricked into thinking it was Yeontan until Tae did his live and told us, nope, that's Rocky, a doggy looking very close to how Yeontan does since he couldn't travel with Tae. We know Yeontan has health issues, so I should've guessed as much, but either way, it is absolutely adorable how much love for Yeontan is in Tae's debut as solo artist. Find you someone that'll love you as much and as deeply as Tae loves Yeontan. I'll wait.

I love the use of the iPhone sounds within the song, the notification tone as well as the typing sound, though it isn't very fitting (it also reminds me of vmin, how they enjoy FaceTiming, texting and calling each other) for someone who was the Samsung Galaxy ambassador ha ha. Wonder what Yoongi had to say about that.

But moving along to the lyrics, as well as two moments from the MV itself, there are a few vmin references that are hard to ignore. And they were "obvious" enough that basically everyone picked up on them.

The first little thing, and this one could very well be a reach, is this Little Prince/Jimin connection. In the MV Tae falls asleep watching TV and we're shown clips of a fox and a flower which immediately made everyone think of the fox and flower from the Little Prince, and then also the moment in the first season of In the Soop when Tae and Hobi went on their little trip and spotted a mural/poster for the Little Prince. Adorable.

Then in the second verse we have Tae singing the following line:

We can start again, open all the doors

The mention of doors made me perk up because it instantly reminded me of this line in Sweet Night:

That I still hope the door is open

So it feels like, if Rainy Days really is a vmin song, it would either play before Sweet Night, or after, when something came between them but Tae wanted a second chance, still had a hope that they could be together and that all things aren't lost yet.

Now this, who do we know basically laughs at anything and everything Tae says, who has mentioned time and again that Tae is the funniest, like in one of the RUN episodes he mentioned how Tae had been making him laugh all day as well's throughout the filming? That's right, our boy Jimin.

Don't believe me? Well, check out this thread and see for yourself.

Next we have the line:

You're my four-leaf clover

Do I really need to explain this one? In a BB or memories DVD, I don't remember exactly, we had a moment when Tae was looking for a four-leafed clover and Jimin, to surprise and make him happy, went and acted as though he'd found one for it (though it wasn't a real four leaf one) which made Tae happy anyway. Years later for their performance of HOME, standing in front of what appeared to be a reference to the Mirror or Erised, we saw vmin wearing matching four-leaf clover necklaces with Tae appearing next to Jimin as though he was what Jimin's heart desired the most.

Then in the MV we have a scene where Tae is in some kind of art room creating. Eventually he picks up a baguette, which points for originality, and uses it to paint a Vante art piece showing a painting that looks like an alien with its little antennas. And who reclaimed the alien "nickname" just a few years and and who is basically the only one who can still call him that? Exactly. Jimin.

Speaking of whom, further in the lyrics we get this line:

Those hurtful words

And sure, perhaps I'm delulu and reaching, whatever, let me have fun, but still that line reminded me of something. FESTA 2020 where Jimin spoke about how he was sorry for the things in the past, how they were buddies back then (I'm still waiting for him to elaborate on that one, they were buddies back then so, Jiminie, what are you now? Care to share?) and got into a lot of disagreements and how he now feels sorry for the harsh words he used with Tae. And Harsh words can very much be hurtful. So another potential reference?

At the end of the day, as I mentioned before, Tae doesn't have writing credits on Rainy Days but, as you just read, those things just fit a little too well to be just a coincidence, right? So perhaps, just like they'd done with Chingu years prior, maybe Tae sat down with the producers/lyricist and told them what he wants in the song?

And that would be it. We're both extremely excited for the rest of Layover, for the next 3 (!!!) MVs, and all the promo Tae mentioned he has planned (based on ideas and things he saw ARMY had mentioned wishing for) and if he'll have writing credits on any of the songs. But it is a little strange to me how Tae has been so outspoken about working on and writing songs for his mixtapes for years, how he'd shown us snippets from his songs, and yet now as we are getting his debut album, no writing credits (so far). Guess we shall wait and see.

[wastedpotentialsblog]

Destiny enemies and enemy models that I really really liked and could've been used more:

Marauder Ultras:

They're fun to fight! They're fast, can use stealth, can use shock blades, and don't have to Boss StompTM. I would've loved to see these guys decked in white, cream, blue, and black if they were on Europa. You don't have to give em Stasis but a different boss than just Large and slow Captain is a nice change of pace.

House Salvation elites (Enforcers, Disciples, and Assisstants)

>Makes 3 custom enemy types that use Darkness powers for the first time, all with unique models and animations

>barely uses them

>they disappear for 2 years

They didn't come back til Seraph! SERAPH. Come on man. These fuckers should've been everywhere throughout BL. I also think their lack of appearance also contributed to the lack of urgency of the "our enemies have darkness now" threat. I mean, we fought like 8 or 9 named "Salvation Elites" but most were just standard Ultra Captains. If they were Elites, they could've just been these guys.

Side note: Out of the new factions of Lucent Hive, Shadow Legion, and House Salvation. Salvation didn't get an "invasion" season to go with their expansion. Robbed. Truly. They made a Military-Industrial Complex and barely set foot anywhere else besides Europa. I also think this was a factor that didnt create any kind of urgency during BL.

Berserkers

Need I say more? Look at this swagged out motherfucker. If House Salvation really subsumed multiple houses under its banner, Kells Scourge included, should've thrown a couple of these bozos out there. Alter the shield mechanic to be more easily disabled by a solo player. Could even make their armor jet black. Given they have stealth itd be a nice visual contrast when they reveal themselves. I didn't play Scourge of the Past too much, but I did enjoy these guys when I did.

(Can you tell I'm biased at this point?)

Psion Flayers

Easy miniboss material. They dont have to be Ultra sized, maybe just slightly bigger than standard Psions. Could even give them a supporting role on the battlefield. Empowering Cabal around them with their enhanced telekinetics, those enhancements varying by elemental type and tying back to our Light 3.0 abilities. (Sun Flayer/Solar=heal, Abyss Flayer/Void=overshields, Storm Flayer/Arc=movement speed). Of course, their armor would have to have more visual differences and distinct silouhettes as I imagine trying to pick out which one is which based on color alone could be difficult for some. Hell, truthfully, I'd be fine if they were just the fucking Psion Sisters from Season of Dawn copy and pasted everywhere. But a supportive role would add more variety to a fight.

Rocket Centurions

Bet you forgot about these dudes, huh? They pop up in the EAZ but, you know, we've been fighting the Cabal for this long, you think more would've strapped rockets to their backs by now. While their missiles are just Colossus slow missiles (iirc), they could just be normal missiles that explode and don't slow just to keep them different. While these could be neat minibosses, if you want an Ultra one at the end of a story mission or something, they could take the Elykris (The Machinist) route of firing missiles where they go straight up in the air and red dots target the ground around you and you have to keep moving. They could've popped back in with the Shadow Legion. I think they could rock black, gold, and purple

Anyway this is mostly about House Salvation and Psion Flayers and I remembered Rocket Centurions in the middle of making this post. If I remember anything, I'll reblog it. I was gonna say something about the other races but Hive don't have a lot of variants that can be turned into minibosses and the Vex got Wyverns (seriosuly. No notes. A perfect enemy type). Obviously it's like way too late to add these to previous story missions, but if we are gonna reuse enemy types, can we reuse some of the cooler ones? Please?

[jackals-ships]

longer post now that i have a chance for the dog ghb first meeting + some relationship stuff that i am realizing is closeish 2 the original but Listen. Vibes;

still fiddling with the bg information bc gestures at the hemospectrum humans wouldn't y'know. Fit There being not trolls but id put them at ~at/below rustbloods in most regards for this timeline just 4 ease

bc of that Dog as Jackal worked primarily in information and infiltration, very much a "got lucky and noticed" type of deal. since bc of the above point a lot of trolls will just kinda gloss over Some Dude in the bg (TO be fair that is universal) + even more so if ur like. shorter than tit height,

ends up getting noticed by HIC who's kinda amused by the whole situation + like me goes :3c y'know what would be REEL funny?

enter jackals no good very bad awful day bc what do you mean the empress wants to talk??

one fear

opening the door and seeing A Fucking Clown

many fear. the fears are in there having a fear orgy

especially once they realize it's not just A Clown it's THE Fucking Clown?? HELLO?

internal monologue is just "what would hurt less me killing myself or him killing me" "probably myself right??" "should I run? no he's Fuck Off Huge"

vibrating at speeds known only to shrimp. b4 this they've Never interacted with these two. hilariously they DID bump into The Orphaner once ("bump" they saw him and wisely scampered The Other Way)

HIC: :3c hey you wanna work for the church ".......what." HIC: it's a yes or no question guppy ".....y. yeah?" HIC: okay cool hey clownfish have ur new boy

im looking at him he's looking at me we're looking at each other + WHAT?

she didn't tell Bachus (goes <3 @almostourgalaxy 4 letting me borrow the names) before hand so he's also "....what?"

i AM a sucker for heart (diamond,) eyes at first sight but it seems more fitting that he's initially "??? NO???" (jackal doing the dog whale eye at the clown bc YOU TOLD HER NO???)

there's a lot of back and forth arguing that boils down to "you're taking them and you're NOT killing them yourself neither is anyone in the church On Purpose" "this is so stupid" "Do It Anyways"

jackal.exe has shut down. the first like 2 weeks they are Not With It! it's legitimately shocking they DIDN'T die by accident

i think the 👀 huh happens when jackal is finally more Themself and he walks in on them throwing hands with another new recruit over smthin stupid

just the combo of them being bloodied and obviously Reckless As Hell he's just "god FUCKING damn it okay"

jackal is now dangling from bachus's hand like a ferret. they've now discovered that having him pet their entire face Is Kinda Soothing. Huh. Neat

immediately back to many fear dot png once they realize WHOMST is holding them by basically the scruff

the relationship is a lot more slow burn bc jackal is Constantly skittering out of his reach, it's like trying to get a feral kitten to stop hissing at you

im deciding still on How They Get Together Properly but i DO know that half the church is contemplating locking them in a room together bc he keeps making sad damp eyes at them and there is only so much everyone can take,

also at least in this regard they are 100% a roach of a man. there is NO way they should've made it thru any training. And Fucking Yet !!!

[voxofthevoid]

@karaargent asked,

i couldn’t choose between 17 & 72 so please pick for me (72 is newwww, the uncle/nephew reveal got you too, huh🤭)

17 has been answered here, so here's 72!

72. bloodstains on the collar means just don't ask

Yuuji’s sexual awakening is the realization that he wants to fuck his big, mean uncle through a mattress; a few years later, his high school teacher makes him realize he just has a specific type in men.

The uncle revelation did get to me! Kind of. It doesn't add anything to the canon sukuita flavor for me, but in a modern AU context? Sign me the fuck up!

This one is already fully outlined. I might write it after the Shibuya Swap. Here are the initial sukuita bits:

Post-dinner couch time, Sukuna starts doing push-ups like a gym rat. Yuuji watching for a while, then asking if Sukuna can do it with Yuuji on his back like he used to when Yuuji was in the single digits. Sukuna tells him to fuck off, and Yuuji starts going on about how he understands, since Sukuna’s all old and weak now, he’d break something—barely finishes before Sukuna’s asking him to get on. Yuuji fakes concern—Dad would be sad. Mum would be…annoyed. Sukuna snarls at him to get up there before he throws Yuuji out of a window.

Yuuji’s some 80 kilos. Sukuna manages a few before he's about to collapse (descriptions of Yuuji seeing and feeling muscles move, the power), then tells Yuuji to get off. Yuuji asks him for one more, Sukuna grunts through it, then asks again, Yuuji tries the same trick. Sukuna loses patience and tries to throw Yuuji off, but this is the kid who’s been surviving him for 15 years. Yuuji reacts on instinct, trying to pin Sukuna. Sukuna ends up with Yuuji breathing hotly into his nape and a boner digging into his back.

Long, pregnant silence. Yuuji breathes Sukuna in deep and moves his hips a little. Finds himself on his back with Sukuna’s hand on his throat—Should've known you'd be a pervert just like your creepy mum. Yuuji gripping Sukuna’s wrist with one hand and his hips with the other, asking him not all that seriously not to talk like that about Kenjaku; Jin doesn’t like it. Sukuna sneering. Yuuji tightens his grip. They don’t move. Tension, a build about to break, the cusp of something—then Yuuji’s phone rings, Jin calling to check in.

End on Yuuji telling him he’s fine while idly massaging his dick through his pants; Sukuna’s also fine—just his usual, you know how he is.

Thanks for asking 💙

Ask in response to the WIP Open Season

[dojae-huh]

Hi, I'm the same person from the TY&DY discussion 👋

Unfortunately, I have problems with my previous account 😭

I'd like to respond.☝️

"I can see how you can be confused, but you are mistaken. What TaeDo have is impossible to fake. They may not meet for 10 years and still maintain the bond. Yes, they sometimes brandish the friendship for entertainment, and Taeyong likes to use being before cameras to annoy Doyoung, but it’s just one part of their dynamic."

I partly agree, I think a big part of their friendship is for entertainment.

"You simply haven’t seen enough of the two. Their vlives, their trainee stories, their moments during award ceremonies and on shows. Taeyong was to Doyoung’s house in Guri (and we learnt about it years later), TaeDo were noticed by fans shopping multiple times. Doyoung searched for pictures of Tae’s tattoo of his deceased dog to gift Tae a custom-made golden pendant based on the drawing, and returned home from his vacation earlier because Tae was lonely in the dorms. It’s not fanservice."

I'm talking about recent events, that's why I showed you these screenshots as evidence.

These vlives, stories are from 90 years ago, not all friendships last forever, people, circumstances change, like I said before, they could've grown apart, that's normal.

For example, he doesn't follow his members on IG and said nothing about DY track or other solo activities, even tho he regularly posts.🤷‍♀️

"TaeDo were noticed by fans shopping multiple times."

So basically you're telling me, that TY&DY lied in that NCT vibe episode? They're not reliable source?👇👇👇

"As for “practiced how to say hello”, it’s Doyoung’s type of humour. TaeDo dynamic is “I hate him”, Tom&Jerry."

Ma'am..........

Your quote comes in handy.

"People see what they want to see and invent "explanations" to support their imagined scenarios and beliefs". - Dojae-huh

The call is coming from inside the house.

Show me precisely his "humour".

Let me repeat it again, because he hasn't seen TY in a long time, he said it in that episode, that's the reason. It's that simple.

Look at the screenshot below or watch the video again, at 15:30. 👇👇👇👇

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=1i8JhNCCP7E&pp=ygUJTmN0IGRvcnJ5

"Real friendships are based on mutual support and understanding, not having parties and going to the movies. Those kind of “fun to hang out with” friends dissapear first when you are in a trouble"

"Fun to hang out with friends" is also part of the friendship. Who are you hanging out with, your teacher? You don't do any fun stuff with your friends!? That's why compatibility is so important.

I was referring to their 10+ years friendship where they've never hung out with just the two of them without the cameras is odd. It doesn't have to be partying, it can be at their own homes or restaurants, where they can talk about what they're up to.

And again... did TY post any support for DY solo concerts or other solo activities after August? If "Real friendships are based on mutual support" he should've posted something, right?

Btw I almost forgot, in the latest episode Tyong&Dorry, Dorry talked about HC 2x & how he's most comfortable going on trips with him, not his bff who sits next besides him? Probably his "humour" too, right? 🤔

The Cuckoo&Delulu dynamic duo.

I'm not "ma'am".

Again, I understand distrust for idol friendships. However, TaeDo is not the case of strictly co-workers or of cuddly trainees who grew up and stopped being as close as before.

TaeDo friendship was not created for entertainment, but it is demonstrated for entertainment from time to time. When Taeyong takes a picture of homemade food Doyoung cooked for him and suddenly brandishes his phone to show the picture to another neo to boast about his privileged position during their live it is not pre-planned fanservice. I guess Doyoung travelling 3 hours by speed train to Busan to support Tae during his filming, and later Tae travelling 6-7 hours by car the same distance to visit Do's filming location this time around was also done for fanservice.

Yes, friendships fall apart, I did mention it. To make a conclusion "they fell apart" you, as an observer, need to take a larger time period than 1 month.

What we know of this year: TaeDo discussed what it means to be a soloist. Taeyong was giving Doyoung advice. Doyoung made sure he watch Taeyong's solo concert's broadcast eventhough he was in Milan that day preparing for a fashion show. Doyoung mentioned Taeyong several times during his own concerts and on other occasions. During Tae's vlives, when Do appeared, Tae asked him to come to his home for drinks. Doyoung sat beside Taeyong during the sending off party, Tae was filming him. There are pictures of Do fondly touching Tae's buzzcut. Doyoung talked about how Taeyong calls him from the army and talks for 30 minutes straight (and it was said in passing, on in the way how he brings up Johhny deliberately). Nothing indicates they distanced from each other for real.

I told you DoTae were noticed shopping without cameras. And not all members even eat out with each other. They are idols. Being alone is truly rare, abroad they are accompanied by managers, and when they have a bit of time, they call non-nct friends to use the opportunity (because they live with neos or meet them at work).

On the screenshots you posted Doyoung said "It's not like we've never (went)", and that telling pout on Tae's face (he was making sure Do got the memo, and Do got it). Yes, they played their reply up for the cameras. The fact that they didn't have time to just hang around recently simply tells how busy they were.

In general, yes, they are not the type of friends to simply spend time together, Tae would like to, but Do doesn't have time (he has tv-shows to appear to), plus Tae is easily recogniseable, they need to go outside the city for it (which they did in 2021 (?), fans had to connect the dots by looking at their IG pictures from the same location, maybe Do mentioned their walk afterward, I don't remember already). TaeDo are each other's emotional pillars. Taeyong once compared himself with a rose and Doyoung to a glass case that protects him.

Verified celeb accs can hide who they follow. Jaehyun "doesn't follow". Doyoung deleted everyone twice. It is because of the scandals with Lucas and Taeil.

As the leader, Taeyong is constantly accused of everything. Like the latest wave of hate he got was about 127 participating in McDonalds ad. And he was already in the military. IG is for business. The acitvity of idols on official socmed doesn't always reflect what really happens in real life. Yuta doesn't care to congratulate the members publicly, and he is the one with 127 themed tattoo on his arm.

I showed "his humour" (Do's) in other posts. There is no point discussing TaeDo dynamics with you when you barely know them, which is well evident from the things you deem important to bring up as argumentation.

Doyoung has several close to him friends. And yes, he explained himself why Haechan is the most comfortable one to sightsee with. Taeyong is the princess in TaeDo dynamic, Doyoung needs to adjust to him (like plan shops Tae likes to visit).

"it can be at their own homes or restaurants, where they can talk about what they're up to".

*big sigh* I don't know if I should laugh, really. The number of times both TaeDo said how often they discuss 127, the future, and "deep talks" they have... Watch the vlives I linked you.

It is my final answer to you. I replied to you because you were polite enough with initial questions. However, I'm not invested in your personal opinion about TaeDo. As an "oldie" fan of 127 of 6,5 years I said you are wrong. You insist on your POV. It's up to you.

Looking at how you got yourself a second acc and the emojis you use, you like to argue. I get it, I'm the same. An argument for the sake of the argument. Whatever I say won't persuade you. If you want to see what TaeDo are about, first really study them. Learn their past, watch hours of their interactions, understand how they tic. All your wrong conslusions are based on "but it's common sense" and not knowing the nuances of the relationship in question.

[imchronicallydepressed]

☆This is still a work in progress, but this is mostly what the first part will be. I will most likely post this on Archive of our Own at some point, just cause some people might prefer to read it on there.

☆I absolutely adore feedback, so please let me know if I can use some work on certain spots or even if it's just to tell me you enjoy it.

☆Double spacing exists solely cause I felt it looked better, I may take it away. Idk

☆ENJOY, PLEASE

Metal Institute

Pt.1

♠︎♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♠︎

You're not good enough

You'll never be good enough

Everything you do only leads to disappointment

Your family hates you

Your mother

Your sister

Even Your father

They all hate you

"Shut up."

You're a mistake and that's all you'll ever be in this life

"You're wrong."

Why do you think they put you in here then? Do you think this is some camp? Get to play around outside all day then go sleep in a tent? Tell stories around the campfire while indulging in sweets?

You're living in a fucken fantasy, Glam.

A laugh. "My name isn't Glam. It's Sebastion and You're nothing but a voice in my head, schizophrenia as the doctors call it. Father put me in here to make me better and that's exactly what the doctors are doing." A smile crossed his lips.

Blasphemy and you know it. We both know it. I'm your conscience and you need to accept that cause guess what, You're stuck with me.

You hate the name Sebastion and you hate playing the Violin. You love rock music and your best friend was a guy you met by the dumpster, remember that?

"I don't know what you're talking about. Father never allowed me to have friends and I would never make friends with someone near the dumpster no less."

How about your favorite song, huh? What about Twisted Sister?

"That music is unholy, shouldn't even be legal. It's rubbish. Bach and Vivaldi are-"

Bach and Vivaldi are the real rubbish. You hate that shit. That's all you were forced to listen to, forced to play.

The father you claim to love you beat you with a ruler. Remember that?! Remember how he made you bleed?! All because you were off by an eighth of a pitch!

"Stop it. You're lying."

These doctors that you claim are helping you are doing the fucken opposite! They're brainwashing you into staying under your father's thumb!

You should've ran, should've went back to your friend, but instead you stayed and look what happened! He beat you and now your in a mental asylum! All because you didn't want the type of life he was making you have!

"S-Shut up!" His hands went to his face, covering his eyes as tears slowly began to trickle down. It wasn't true, was it? His father wouldn't lock him away just cause he... wanted a different life, right?

Look at yourself! Look at your wrists! Look at the scars your father inflicfed upon you! Look at the marks from the binds that held you down while the doctors performed their sick experiments on you! What about your ankles? Tied so damn tight that it nearly cut off blood flow, all so you couldn't escape!

Look at those wounds covering your body and tell me that I'm not speaking the truth.

He moved his hands down from his face, leaning over to the dim moonlight that shown in through the plexiglass window. Tears rolled off his cheeks now, one after another as he examined his wrists, the scars that will forever remain due to his dear father.

Look at them, Glam.

Tell me, does this look like something a loving father would allow? Would a loving father allow such experiments to be had on his one and only son? Would a loving father beat their son?

He placed his hands over his mouth, trying to muffle the soft sobs that followed his tears. He'd been so far gone with all the 'treatments' that he blantly accepted them. He blantly accepted being strapped to a cold metal table, allowing the doctors to inject God knows what into his veins.

The food he ate, the beverages he'd recieved... who knows what was in them, what sort of shit he was being slipped. Not to mention the effects he'd been feeling. The nausea, the headaches, the fuzzy memories, and now he was hearing voices...

You finally get it, don't you?

Your father doesn't love you. You will forever be a disappointment in his eyes and you will forever be in your sisters shadow.

"L-Leave Lydia out of this... she doesn't deserve to be... placed on the same platform like father." He spoke again, dragging his hands down his face and pulling his legs up.

As much as he despised being constantly compared to the likeness of his sister, she'd never once laid a hand on him. She'd actually used to be the one to bandage him up when they were younger, while their mother hid in the shadows, too scared to stand up for her children.

Tell me, Sebastion... what sort of platform does your loving father deserve to be put on? What sort of outcome does he deserve in all this?

"Outcome? He won't get to receive the deserved outcome. In the end, I'm stuck in here and... those doctors will continue to try and... 'fix me'."

Oh, don't you worry about that. He will get his fill of Karma. Don't frazzle your pretty mind with such worry. Besides, you have me! I will get you out of here.

"How will you help me escape? You're nothing but my own conscience. Besides, the guards in this place are armed."

You needn't worry. All in due time. Why don't we look at the future, though? Why don't we look at what will come to your father?

So tell me, when we do escape, and we will by any means necessary, what end does your father deserve?

He began to laugh, his eyes seeming to fill the dark room with vivid thoughts. Then his laughing grew. It became louder and louder, more maniacal. The things he was seeing, the actions he was performing... Violent actions. The same actions he had once written down, the same actions his father had confronted him about upon finding his journal.

He still felt like such an idiot for that mistake. If he just... double checked, and made sure that the 'line of defense' wasn't at a risk of being found out about. None of this would have happened. He might still be stuck at home, sure, but he'd have his best friend. He'd have access to his records. He'd have access to THE record.

"I'll tell you what he deserves! I'll tell you what end I want to grant him!" He stood, going to the window and placing his hands firmly upon it, glancing up at the moon.

"I want to see his blood spill. I want to beat him with that fucken ruler until he's begging for mercy. Maybe even a baseball bat!" He turned, facing the darkness of the room, more laughing emitting from his mouth. Now he really did sound like he belonged in such a place.

"I want him to suffer and bleed, the same way I had to. I want to see that bastard cry and beg for forgiveness!" He could only continue to laugh as he fell to his knees, the vision growing more and more realistic by the second.

Glam ran his fingers through the tangled mess of hair, looking up at the ceiling for a moment with more maniacal laughter.

"Maybe I'll make him play the Violin. Then I can stand there and criticize every bar and note he plays! Slap his wrists until blood it dripping to the floor!"

Good! Good! You're getting the hang of it! That's the spirit! You're spine is tingling with the excitement, the anticipation!

So remind me, what's your name again?

"Glam! My name is Glam..." He spoke calmly now, placing his hands on the ground in front of him.

Right, you're finally getting it. What else do you know?

"I-I have a best friend... what was his name again?" He glanced around the moon lit room for a moment before scratching his head, fingers getting tangled in the matted mess of hair.

You know this answer, Glam. Don't expect me to help you with such stupid questions.

"I-I don't remember..."

You need to remember him! Don't let your memory start fading away, now think harder. What was his fucken name?!

He held his head in his hands for a moment, more tears forming in the corners of his eyes. He couldn't remember him, no matter how hard he tried. He couldn't remember his name, why he was called that...

Just... who he was physically. What he looked like, how he had helped Glam through the bullshit. The messy brown hair, the disgusting green jacket, that annoying voice and those horrid yellow teeth.

"C-Chive..." He finally mumbled to himself after a moment. That was his name, right? He knew it at least started with a C.

Good boy, Glam. You're making progress. Do not forget Chive. Don't forget what he looked like or what he did for you. If you forget him, then that might as well be the end.

Glam put his face in his hands again. Don't forget? How was he supposed to manage that when he was being tortured and experimented on day in and day out. Hell, he barely remembered the last this he ate.

The fact of the matter was that without his friend, he'd never discover the beauty of rock music. The beauty outside of that fucken prison of a house. Sure, he had to deal with some... painful repercussions, but it was so worth it. Getting to play in front of a crowd, especially play music he was actually proud of? It was the best feeling in the world to him.

"He probably thinks I abandoned him..." He gripped his hands into fists. "M-my one and only friend... thinks I abandoned him..."

Who would ever know what became of Glam outside of his family. -He was sent away to a special music school, one that didn't allow such... worthless talent to blindly be accepted- That was probably along the lines of what he'd say to the school anyways. Chive would never step foot near his front door, so it's not like he'd come knocking.

Stop worrying. We'll get out of here in no time. Soon enough you'll be back at his side and the two of you will be playing again before you know it. You'll even have your favorite record back.

Remember that song Glam? It's your favorite.

He began to chuckle softly, tears still rolling down his cheeks. "We're not gonna take it..." He started singing, the vocals raspy and sloppy.

No! We ain't gonna take it!

"We're not gonna take it anymore..." He pulled his knees back to his chest, tears continuing to flow as his off key singing kept up, his voice seeming to echo in the emptiness that was his confinement cell.

That song. It'd got him to discover life outside of classical bullshit. Now it was gonna be the song to help him escape this hell. No matter the cost.