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lucid-loves · 2 months ago

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His First

You invited March with you to the Shooting Star Festival every year to the point where the blacksmith expects his invite naturally. When you decide to invite Caldarus instead, March grows mad with jealousy and pushes for you to tell him the truth, eager to take you back. You were his first, after all.

Words: 4.9k

March x farmer!reader, fem!reader, swearing, angst, and fluff (SPOILERS FOR “BREAKING THE FIRE SEAL” QUEST)

The long awaited annual Shooting Star Festival has come. Like always, the town was buzzing with excitement to see the gorgeous display of the night sky dancing for the end of summer. Star-themed lights, pillows, and blankets were taken out of the shadows of the closet, new and established couples presented invitation brooches, and everyone worked to finish their responsibilities early.

March, however, was playing it cool. He did indeed look forward to the nighttime show, especially since you began inviting him to watch it with you every year since you arrived. But, he never wanted to look too eager. Too happy. Every time you have presented that iconic invite, he has pretended that it was a hassle. That he was only saying yes because his older brother would scold him if he declined.

Secretly, he enjoyed watching the stars with you. He enjoyed the attention you gave him. He anticipated walking you home right after. He felt proud of the fact that out of all the other people in the town, you chose him to bring your fates closer together.

So where the hell were you today?!

The grumpy blacksmith continued pounding out nails for an order, grumbling in irritation and impatience every hit of his hammer. Olric, the caring brother that he was, noticed right away how quickly his mood shifted to expecting excitement to pure frustration. As time ticked on, Olric also wondered why his brother hadn't received his invitation to the festival yet.

It wasn’t until March accidentally made a nail too flat that he spoke up. March never made mistakes unless something was really wrong. “Hey, bro, do you wanna take a break?”

“No.” March curtly responded, his voice snappy enough to even put his brother on edge.

Of course, that wouldn’t sway Olric. “March, what’s wrong? You know that nothing will change unless you talk about your feelings.”

The hammer ceased midair, the blacksmith debating on if he should be honest. He was never honest when it came to you normally. He didn’t even want to entertain the very real possibility that he liked you, not that it was much of a secret to everyone else. March was in denial and he wanted to stay within that comfort zone.

And yet. . .

“I’m not seeing the stars tonight.” March decided, dipping his toes into the water of honesty.

Olric raised his brows in surprise and confusion. “What? But you always go with Y/n. Did something happen?”

March scoffed and threw the hammer against the anvil, the loud, sudden clang of it startling anyone nearby. “I don’t know! She didn’t come to invite me today! I’m not at fault for anything. She must be the one with the problem.”

“Bro. . .”

“Don’t pity me. I don’t care about the festival. She can do whatever she wants!” March fumed, clearly not okay with how things turned out despite his protests. His older brother could practically steam coming out of his ears from anger.

“There’s still time before the stars. Maybe she’s just busy working today. She did expand her farm recently, so maybe she’s trying to get it ready for Fall.” Olric tried to reason, but even he was grasping at straws. You were never the type to wait around until the last minute when it came to your invites. You tended to give March the brooch first thing in the morning so no one else could beat you to it.

“Like I said. I. Don’t. Care.” March dismissed as walked away from the forge and into the shop. Olric could hear the slam of his bedroom door from outside. Knowing his little brother, he probably just needed some time to cool off. Surely, you didn’t forget about March out of malice, right?

A few hours later and March still hasn’t seen you. Every now and then, he looked out his window to see if you were just late as Olric suggested. When he saw no one, he just reassured himself that he didn’t care and went back to his solo pity party. By the time the sun began to set and everyone got ready for the event, March gave up waiting around for you.

“Stupid farmer, making me wait. Stupid girl, raising my expectations.” He muttered under his breath as he walked around town, trying to find a good spot to view the skies. As he walked around, he secretly looked for you. Maybe you decided to join one of the families this year. Maybe you promised to watch the stars with the kids instead. Or maybe. . .

March shook his head to himself, his dyed red hair hitting his cheeks. No. You wouldn’t invite someone else. You always invited him and only him. He was the one that you chose every year. He was the one that begrudgingly made conversation on the cliff with you. He was the one that made sure you got home safe.

Why didn’t you ask him this year?

The thoughts invaded his brain outside of his control. He felt his heart ache and his head get rampant. It was heavier than the anvil he worked on every day. March didn’t even realize that he was walking towards your usual spot that you shared every single year. Except this year.

His steps stopped as his eyes finally caught your figure. Just up ahead, there you were, making your way to the best view that the town had to offer. You had changed out of your farm clothes for something more comfortable. Something nicer and not covered in dirt. You even changed your hair for the occasion, dawning hair clips in the shape of stars. There was an eager spring in your step and a clear smile on your face that had the twinkling stars beat.

What the fuck?

Instead of calling out to you outright to demand some answers, March decided to follow you quietly. He knew that what he was doing could be considered creepy. Stalkerish even. Yet, he couldn’t help himself. What or who the hell got you so happy? And why wasn’t it him?

Keeping a safe and quiet distance, he trailed behind you all the way up to the peak. The usual blanket, pillows, and even picnic basket you normally shared with him was out on display. Two pillows.

March felt his face grow hot. The knots in his stomach ate itself like writhing snakes. It only got worse as someone from the right woods walked up to you, smiled, and took a seat next to you.

Who the fuck is that?

The man that was your date tonight had long, dark hair the color of evergreen pine trees. He had odd, protruding horns that looked nearly real. His clothes were long and flowy, a very traditional style that anyone would think was old-fashioned. A long and large tail moved behind him, also something that didn’t seem like just an accessory.

Who was this monster and why did he take his rightful place?

Clenching his jaw and fists, March watched the two of you chat, smiling over shared thoughts about the stars and how they were first viewed historically. The guy seemed smart and poetic. He also seemed to really enjoy having private time with you. You were having a good time too.

A new emotion overcame March. His hands went slack at his sides as the fire went out within him. Even with the weather still being Summer’s warmth, March felt cold to his core. This date was nothing like when you were with him. No awkward silences. No shut-downs in conversation. You weren’t nervous at all compared to when you tried to get closer to him.

Was that why you replaced him? Did you not like him anymore? Were you tired of his lack of enthusiasm and unwillingness to open up?

March bit his lip hard as he contemplated on what to do next. He said that he didn’t care. He tried to convince himself that he didn’t want you if you didn’t want him. However, standing in the shadows of the trees, barely seeing the stars that weaved people’s fates together, watching you and the mystery man share a moment that only comes once a year, he knew it wasn’t true.

Even if you didn’t want him anymore, he still wanted you. It wasn’t in March’s nature to just give up either. You were his first. Like hell he was going to lose you to someone else, especially to someone that he didn’t even know.

Steeling his resolve and without thinking it through, he stepped out of the woods and approached your blanket. The familiar fire was back in his onyx eyes, burning as hot as the forge he worked with everyday. “Y/n.”

Your heart skipped a beat as the deep voice you for long ago called out your name so determinedly. So possessively. You were quick to turn your attention to the stubborn blacksmith that planned on hijacking your time with Caldarus. While you did feel a momentary high of getting the person you like’s attention, you also felt a sense of dread begin to build. Caldarus wasn’t ready to be seen by people yet. It took a lot of strength from him to even meet you here tonight.

Besides that, March looked pissed. “March? What are you doing here?”

“I should ask you the same thing. What are you doing here with him? Who is he?” March demanded, his arms crossing over his chest as he glared at the stranger. Caldarus looked anxious for a moment before taking a deep breath, calming his nerves. For some reason, that pissed him off even more.

“I supposed that I will be discovered sooner or later. Y/n, how would you like to go about this?” Your partner questioned, giving you more control over the situation. It put you in an uncomfortable spot, but you were grateful that Caldarus had the sense to step back to let you handle March.

“I’m sorry about this, Caldarus. Before we do anything, how is your energy?” You considered, for now focusing on the needs of someone that wasn’t used to living as a human. March simmered as you stayed calm during the whole ordeal and gave even more of your attention to someone that wasn’t him. At least you didn’t outright dismiss him, though he still hoped you at least begged for his forgiveness.

Caldarus places a hand over his heavy heart. “I am at my limit. It would be a good time to head back. I may be up for further discussion within my own domain anyway.”

You got up and started packing your things in the basket, the show ending earlier than expected for you. Even if the outing was coming to a close the way it did, at least Caldarus got to see the shooting stars from a better view. It had been hundreds of years since he wasn’t an unmoving statue after all.

Once you were packed, you let Caldarus take the lead back to his home within the Deep Woods. March didn’t need to be told to follow along. He just did. He wouldn’t dare leave you alone with the stranger even if you were friendly with him. March wasn’t, and that’s all that mattered.

When you approached the large home, March lost his anger in a moment of shock. He hadn’t been in the Deep Woods for a long time. Along with the path having been swallowed by unruly vines with thorns, his parents’ grave was in the back memorial. That was something he wasn’t ready to approach yet, even with Olric’s support. So, he had no clue that such a pristine yard and castle-like home existed in town. Could anyone good really live away so isolated from people? How did you come to know him?

The inside of the home was clean and warm, the hearth in the middle kicking off a comfortable heat while it brewed a perpetual tea. March stood in awe at all the scrolls lining the back walls, the ornate bed with dragon detailing so unique in its own, and at the dragon statue that gave off a peculiar energy unlike anything he’s felt before.

All the while, you strolled around comfortably, helping Caldarus settle down on a pillow by the hearth. You filled a cup with tea and passed it over to him. From one sip, the color in his skin began to glow more brightly. How could someone that looked so powerful have such a weak constitution?

“Thank you, Y/n. This is exactly what I needed.” Caldarus graciously thanked. You nodded in response, knowing that it was good enough as the two of you understood each other.

Now, for the hard part. “Take a seat, March. Do you want some tea too?”

The burning irritation came back as you treated him so casually. “No. Just tell me what is going on.”

When the blacksmith took a seat, you poured yourself some tea and thought about your next words carefully. It wasn’t just Caldarus’s existence that was a secret that you were going to reveal. You had also been careful to keep your real identity a secret too.

Most people were still nervous and fearful of magic since at times it could be chaotic and uncontrollable. You didn’t think the people of Mistria would burn you at the stake for being a witch. That wasn’t in their kind-hearted nature. However, you didn’t want to risk being discouraged from living among them. You have been careful to protect everything that you have worked so hard to build.

There was no best way to start the conversation. March hated it when people beat around the bush too. The best thing to do was just dive right into the subject. “This man is named Caldarus. He is a dragon that has taken a human form only until very recently. Before that, he was confined to the form of a dragon statue on my farm.”

“. . . What?” Now March was just confused. He knew of the statue, but he had no clue that it was really some being trapped inside. If that was true, why didn’t the statue say anything the few times he wandered over before you took over the farm? How come you knew that information while everyone else didn’t?

You could tell that he was getting irritated with the missing pieces. Still, you tried to stay patient. “Only I was able to communicate with him in his statue form because I am a witch. I have an innate magical ability to do many things that would otherwise be impossible for other people. Caldarus became my partner in teaching me new spells. It was natural that we formed a bond from this.”

March’s brows scrunched together tightly. “Why didn’t you say anything before? Juniper does crazy things all the time with that cauldron of hers. It’s not like we would hate you.”

Your lips drew into a tight line. Caldarus simply sipped his tea, listened, and rested. “My magic is different from Juniper’s. Mine is more. . . involved.”

“Dangerous?”

“I wouldn’t say that. I use a lot of magic to help grow my farm.” You awkwardly answered. You were having a hard time finding the right words to describe what you did. Why you kept it hidden.

Fortunately, March noticed your discomfort and let it go. As much as he wanted to ask more, he didn’t want to push it. It wasn’t like he could understand much of it anyway. He could barely understand Juniper’s magic.

He moved on. “Fine, whatever. So why didn’t this guy just introduce himself to us when he became human? Why all the secret living?”

Caldarus cleared his throat to take over the conversation. “As mentioned before, I was living as a statue for hundreds of years. Much of my memory before and some during then had been a struggle to recover. My own magic and energy has been fragile as well. Before becoming involved with the people of the town, I decided that focusing on my recovery would be best. I would expect many to have questions for me, so I would like to regain as much of my memories as I can so I could answer those questions honestly.”

March didn’t agree with that decision, but he understood it. If the dragon really had been stuck all this time with only you to talk to, the others would probably find it odd that he knew so much about what’s been going on. It was no longer a wonder why the two of you seemed so close.

Not that he still wasn’t mad about it.

“While he recovers, I’ve been checking in on him when I can. I plan on helping him when he is ready to meet everyone too.” You revealed, finishing off your tea as the conversation seemed to naturally come to a close. You couldn’t think of anything else to add either. You thought that your explanations have been thorough enough.

Settling your cup on the edge of the hearth, you stood from the pillow. “It’s late. We should head home. I’m sure Caldarus would like some time by himself too.”

“Thank you for considering me, Y/n. Though, I may have enough energy to walk you back home if you would like. I know the farm is a long ways from here.” Your partner smiled, also drinking the last drops of his flavorful tea.

March’s alarm bells began to go off, his heart leaping before it looked. He quickly grabbed your wrist and pulled you to his side, his expression firm and mean. Your eyes widened as you collided with his firm chest, butterflies going wild in your tummy. “I will walk her home.”

Caldarus didn’t say anything for a moment. It was hard to tell what he was thinking with such a neutral expression. The ancient dragon was no fool, though. He knew where your feelings swayed towards from private talks and exchanged secrets. It was clear to him how the blacksmith felt as well, even if he was stubborn about it.

After a minute, he closed his eyes in acceptance. “Very well. Ensure she gets home safely.”

“You don’t need to tell me that.” He retorted sharply before dragging you out the door with him. You didn’t even get a chance to say a proper goodbye before you were out in the night again.

You were upset. Now that you were not balancing the two men and it was just you and March, you let your hell unleash. “What the hell, March?! Why are you so rude?!”

March stopped in the middle of the path, refusing to let go of your wrist. He fueled his flame when you began to chew him out. Your pleasant mask dropped like a stone when it was just the two of you. “Rude?! Me?! What about you? Keeping secrets. Hiding people? Asking out someone else tonight?”

You blinked twice at his accusations, unsure if you heard him right. “Asking out someone else? Wait. . . were you waiting for me? Are you jealous?”

A red so deep that it was noticeable even in the dark rapidly colored his face. From the tips of his ears to the bridge of his nose, March blushed. “J-Jealous?! Absolutely not! You just ruined my expectations of you, that’s all!”

A wicked smirk began to take over your lips. His chest threatened to burst from how fast his heart raced. “Come on, don’t be shy now. You were waiting for me to ask you out like I always did, huh?”

He finally let go of your wrist and turned his back on you, shielding his face with the back of his hand. He couldn’t stand it when you gloated. He began to walk forward again to escape this torment. “Idiot! I wasn’t!”

“Uh-huh. Then why did you come to the cliff tonight?” You pried, moving around him to try to catch another glimpse at his cute, flustered face. The idea that March was jealous over you made you giddy. The fact that he waited for you made your body sing too. There was no way you were letting this go. Not after all the years you’ve been pining for him within your rivalry.

“Okay, fine! I saw you with a stranger after waiting for you all day to give me the brooch! You didn’t even give me a warning! When I saw you having fun with someone I didn’t know, I got mad, alright. Happy now, Y/n?!”

March didn’t mean to yell at you, but he could only handle so much teasing. Especially when it came from you. Your moment of childish joy was quickly snuffed out as March expressed genuine hurt over the whole ordeal. You froze in your place as those butterflies died. You looked down in shame, considering how you did mess up tonight.

When he noticed that you weren’t following behind him anymore, he stopped and turned around. He wasn’t expecting to see you so regretful. His own pettiness took a backseat for a change as he grew concerned for you. “Y/n?”

“I’m sorry, March. You’re right. I should have given you a warning first. I honestly didn’t really think about it if I’m being honest. . .” You genuinely apologize, holding yourself as a way to give yourself some comfort.

The blacksmith didn’t know if he should be offended or forgiving. He waited a moment while you seemed to build up some courage to say something else, hoping that it would clear up his possible misconception on where he stood with you.

You gave a shaky sigh, having still not gotten over the trauma of what had happened earlier that year. Still, you decided that March deserved more truth tonight. “Caldarus saved my life. Without him sacrificing his magic, I would have died.”

“I was opening a deeper part of the mines that was sealed off. There were many sealed doors, but I was able to open each one using things I found naturally in the levels and magic. But this one needed a Sealing Scroll. Balor managed to procure one for me through a connection. Costed me a ton of gemstones.” You dryly chuckled, hoping that it would shake the edge off.

It didn’t, but you continued. “I was warned not to open it at all costs since the scroll would be dangerous. I didn’t think much of it since I didn’t intend on opening it in the first place. When I used it to unseal the door though, it opened on its own. It was a trap I couldn’t escape in time and before I knew it, I couldn’t move. It sucked the life out of me. Even if I yelled for help, I was so deep underground that I knew no one would be able to hear me.”

“Through my connection with Caldarus, he sensed that something was wrong. I was on the edge of death after all. He couldn’t do anything for me in his statue state, so he sacrificed a part of himself to burn the Sealing Scroll and save me. That’s how he had turned into a weak mortal.”

You shook your head at your past stupidity. You should have been more cautious handling such dangerous magic. You should have considered Balor’s warning more seriously. Your careless mistake cost Caldarus his magic. Nearly his own life with how the effort depleted him. You could never take him for granted again. “I invited Caldarus to the festival tonight as a token of my gratitude. He couldn’t remember the last time he had a good view of the shooting stars. Besides. . . you never seemed to care all that much for it anyway. I thought that you had just been tolerating it. Still, I should’ve let you know beforehand before inviting someone else. For that, I’m sorry, March.”

March was speechless. He didn’t know what to say. He could barely process the fact that at one point this year, you could have died. Worst yet, no one would’ve found your body. At least not soon enough. Besides almost losing you to someone else, he could’ve lost you permanently. And he wouldn’t have even known.

You were still clearly traumatized by your experience. The way you refused to meet his eyes, the way your feet shifted as your nerves zipped through your cells, the way you held back tears that threatened to spill from those beautiful eyes.

Putting his own feelings aside, he pulled you into his arms and wrapped them tightly around you. A hand settled on your head, encouraging you to have it rest against his chest. Your body was stiff at first, having never expected this kind of affectionate action from March. His chin rested on your head while he rubbed your back. “You don’t have to hold back anymore. I’m here.”

Your body finally relaxed against his as you buried your face in his shirt, silent tears pouring out freely. You haven’t had anyone to confide in about the accident. Not even Caldarus in hopes that he wouldn’t think that you invited him out of guilt alone. March was the first and only person that knew your trauma now. And he handled it like a genuine friend.

He let you cry for as long as you needed, patiently waiting until you pulled back to wipe your face with your sleeve. The front of his shirt was soaked with tears and wrinkled from your grip, but he didn’t care. All that mattered to him now was that you were here with him.

As it should have been.

“Come on. Let’s get you home.” March intertwined his fingers with yours, gently pulling you along the path. When he looked up at the sky out of pure chance, he noticed that stars were still burning out along the dark canvas of night. It wasn’t as much as its peak time, but it was still a marvel.

You had noticed too, looking up to watch the last of the stars signal the end of a busy summer. “Beautiful, right?”

“Yeah. . . Beautiful. . .” March agreed. However, when you looked back at him, you noticed that he was looking at you instead of the sky. A light heat teased the tips of your ears as you caught on that he was talking about you.

After a moment of silence and more walking, he spoke up. “I’m sorry that I got. . . jealous.”

He was staring straight ahead when he said his apology, but you knew that he still meant it genuinely. It took a lot for March to admit his faults, so you knew he always really meant it when he said that he was sorry. You smiled to yourself, feeling the connection between the two of you become stronger. “It’s okay.”

His grip became stronger as you forgave him. He was grateful that you didn’t tease him either about his admitted jealousy. A new peace and understanding was there now, something that was welcomed with open arms as March realized that he liked you more than he realized. Not that he would openly admit that any time soon.

Finally, the two of you reached your farm. The animals were fast asleep in their cozy barns, the growing produce still dripped from the morning’s drink, and the gentle rustle of leaves from your orchard brought over a sweet smell to mix with the natural earth. You had worked hard to get to where you were, magic or not. Even if he couldn’t understand your magical abilities right now, he could still appreciate how you used it for the benefit of the town.

He walked you all the way to your front door, hesitant to let go of your hand. Separating somehow felt like severing a deep connection. Like the forge going cold when it should be fiery at all times. You weren’t just meant to be with him on this night. You were meant to be with him every night.

Soft light spilled from the crack of your opening door, giving him a peek on how hard you worked on your house too. Perhaps at another time you would invite him in.

“Thanks for walking me home, March.” You nervously smiled, wondering if a simple thanks was enough to really show how much you appreciated him tonight. While things started rocky, you couldn’t help but still feel accomplished as you ended up becoming closer to the blacksmith than ever before.

This affection you felt for him continued to blossom as he gave you a simple, yet confident nod. “You’re welcome, Leo.”

Before he could give a final goodbye to leave, you stepped forward, stood on the tips of your toes, and gently pressed your lips to his. It was his turn to freeze from the sudden affection, his brain taking a moment to process what was happening. His heart raced like the last stars above, blazing brightly almost painfully before falling away as you pulled back. Your face was as pink as the peaches that grew in your trees. March’s face matched your tomatoes. “Good night.”

He was speechless as you closed the door, leaving him in the night on such a heart throbbing note. With no choice, he turned and began to walk back to his own home, touching his lips carefully with his fingertips as if afraid to erase the kiss that still lingered.

With a chaotic mixture of surprise, ache, anger, and joy, March thought about just how soft your lips were against his the entire walk home.

#fields of mistria #fields of mistria march #march x reader #fom march #march x farmer #march x you #fom march fanfic #fields of mistria fanfic

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jacksgreysays · 1 year ago

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(Not sure if I can qualify for another prompt after the last wonderful prompt fill but here goes:

The Academy was perfectly fine with Shikamaru’s imaginary friend Shikako, until she managed to ____.

Oh dona, there are so many things that can fill in that blank. SO MANY THINGS. And, I’ll be honest, a lot of what comes to my mind range from funny to alarming. But the on that I think is the most encompassing—without being too boring—is simply “get caught.” Because that opens up so many opportunities for what else she could have been doing before she got caught in such a way that also builds a dynamic between those who are in on it (ie, the Rookie Nine, maybe even the full Konoha Twelve since Team Gai IS only just one year older) and those who aren’t (presumably the teachers of the Academy) However, in order to narrow this fic down into something writable, I should figure what Shikako is doing before she gets caught… and, maybe this is just me, but I kinda like the idea of… now maybe this is too specific… but basically, Shikamaru’s imaginary friend Shikako, aka his literal sentient eldritch horror twin sister that lives in his shadow, just straight up eating Danzo. Just. How do you get rid of something? Eat it. Because, like… okay. My brain goes something like this:

“Hm,” says Shikamaru as they hide in the treetops from Iruka-sensei.

Normally, Shikamaru is content with being out of the classroom that, outside from telling them the plan needed to ditch and stay hidden, he stays pretty quiet either cloud watching or napping.

Chouji, in his spot next to Shikamaru and equally satisfied with just being outside, is the only one to hear him. “What is it?” He asks.

That gets Kiba and Naruto to perk up, starting to get bored after their flawless escape with minimal conflict.

“Shikako says she’s hungry.”

Good friend that he is, Chouji offers some of his chips. A tendril of Shikamaru’s shadow shakily takes one, wobbling even under that weight, but Shikako is also a good friend so she eats it.

Well. She tries, anyway. Shikamaru’s shadow curls around it, mimicking a chewing motion, but it remains unchanged.

After a moment, Shikamaru reports, “Shikako says thank you, but she might need to eat something else specifically?”

Naruto, ever curious asks, “What does a shadow even eat?”

Shikamaru shrugs. “She says she’ll know it when we find it.”

Kiba, and an Akamaru squirming with eagerness, declares, “Akamaru and I are the best and finding stuff. We’ll get it in no time.”

—

Iruka-sensei finds them before they find the ambiguous “it.”

To be fair, they were searching through the refrigerator in the teacher’s lounge, and their self assigned mission had carried them through to lunch time. So really it was their own fault.

Didn’t stop Naruto, Kiba, and Akamaru from yelling and howling up a storm as Iruka-sensei grabbed the two boys by the collars of their shirts. Mizuki-sensei at least just gestured his two charges forward, trusting that Shikamaru and Chouji would cooperate since they had been caught fair and square. And plus, it was lunch time.

Distracted as they were, none of the boys noticed Shikamaru’s shadow stretch itself to connect to Mizuki-sensei’s.

Without that context, none of them made the connection when, not even a minute later, Mizuki-sensei stumbled, nearly falling, before catching himself in an uncertain stance.

“You okay?” Iruka-sensei asked, caregiving nature winning over his desire to continue lecturing the boys.

Mizuki-sensei waved him off with a strained laugh, “Ha, I just felt a little tired—midday slump, probably.”

Kiba and Naruto, sensing weakness, re-aim their efforts from complaining to making fun of Mizuki-sensei’s age. It draws his ire, never mind that he tries to seem cooler than Iruka-sensei, but he musters a woozy, half-hearted defense at best.

Shikamaru glances at his shadow, darker and deeper than it was before.

Shikako isn’t as hungry anymore.

—

A/N: And then something something Ino and Sakura spot the boys questing for Shikako’s food and they also believe in/like Shikako anyway so they try to help out, Shino gets pulled in because they end up on Aburame territory and he’s holding his smiling baby sister and his untouchable vibes are way lowered, at some point they’re like… maybe Hinata can use her cool eyes to FIND what Shikako needs (and she’s stalking Naruto anyway so we might as well actively include her) and then Sasuke kind of feels left out ALTHOUGH… I may have a separate thing for how Sasuke gets pulled in. Anyway the kids try to figure out what she’s doing—she doesn’t eat chakra, she eats life energy, but only out of people that she wants to kill anyway and the amount she eats from them is maybe based on how much she wants to kill them? (she really does almost eat Kabuto to death the first time they encounter him lol)—and they’re like… well… we also don’t like the people Shikako doesn’t like anyway? Here’s where plot maybe comes in and maybe where Sasuke gets pulled in but basically if this is pre-Uchiha Massacre then there could be a day when Itachi goes to pick up the little Uchiha members from the Academy and Shikako is just like ??? DO I want to kill and eat him??? because he hasn’t done anything (YET) so it’s just like… the rest of the kids investigating into Sasuke to investigate into Itachi which then somehow Scooby Doo style gets them to Danzo and MAYBE he’s being a creeper and visiting the Academy to recruit future ROOT agents or MAYBE the Academy building is near the Hokage’s Tower (I think???) or Shisui and Itachi are BOTH picking up the various Uchiha Academy students and Danzo tries to use the opportunity to intimidate/threaten them both “subtly” and Shikako’s just like !!!!! FEAST MODE!!!! And fully just eldritch style swallows him whole in front of some Academy teachers :) And it’s not like Shikamaru can get in trouble because he’s BEEN telling the truth about his imaginary friend Shikako the whole time. And as far as they know it LOOKS like a Nara clan technique so they’re like… well… uh… maybe we should tell the Jounin Commander about this. And Shikaku’s just like… uh… Kasuga… what the fuck… And Kasuga turns to Sembei-obaasan and also asks what the fuck… And Sembei-obaasan has to search deep deep into the Nara oral tradition for what the fuck is going on And Shikako is just in Shikamaru’s shadow, totally pleased with herself. I’m not hungry anymore :)

#jacksgreyson #donapoetrypassion #ask box advent calendar #dreaming of sunshine #shikako nara #shikamaru nara #chouji akimichi #hungry sister

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thegayhimbo · 10 days ago

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Stranger Things (2x07): “The Lost Sister” Review

If you haven't yet, be sure to check out my other reviews:

Stranger Things Episode Reviews:

Season 1:

The Vanishing of Will Byers

The Weirdo on Maple Street

Holly Jolly

The Body

The Flea and the Acrobat

The Monster

The Bathtub

The Upside Down

Season 2:

MADMAX

Trick or Treat, Freak

The Pollywog

Will the Wise

Dig Dug

The Spy

Stranger Things Play:

Stranger Things The First Shadow

I’ve always felt bad for "The Lost Sister." I remember seeing this for the first time in 2017, being intrigued enough by Kali’s character to want to see her return, and even liking the complicated dynamic she had with El. I was sad when I got into the fandom and saw the hatred directed at Kali and this episode. I'm also disappointed that Kali hasn’t made an appearance since season 2. While I understand some of the issues people have with “The Lost Sister,” I always shake my head in disbelief whenever I see claims about how this is the worst episode of Stranger Things.

No, it isn’t. Not by a long shot.

Compared to future episodes like “Suzie, Do you Copy?” (which featured cringe-inducing humor and managed to degrade several of its characters), or “Vecna’s Curse” (which was DEEPLY mean-spirited and featured a MAJOR continuity error with Will’s birthday that fans are still sore about), “The Lost Sister” looks like a masterpiece. Both those episodes were bad enough that I was seriously questioning if I was going to enjoy the rest of seasons 3 and 4. Thankfully, I did, but they were rough to get through, and NOT ones I look forward to whenever I rewatch.

By contrast, “The Lost Sister,” while not perfect, had fun moments and intriguing ideas that kept me invested. It’s also an episode I would argue that has slowly improved with time. While it comes off as a side quest on the surface (especially when looking at season 2’s overall arc with the Mind Flayer) it’s one that not only is important to El’s growth this season (and may even be important to Kali’s character development depending on how you look at it), but also factors into the overall mythology the show has established. There are several themes, plot elements, and revelations from this episode that come into play during season 4 when the show finally starts giving answers about Hawkins Lab. We even get subtle foreshadowing for the direction El’s arc would take in later seasons as she’s forced into a reckoning with her past and her place in the world.

Something I’ve tried to emphasize with these reviews isn’t just how certain aspects that may appear trivial on first viewing become more important down the road, but also how initial reactions really aren’t the best source for how something should be judged. I don’t want to be the person throwing stones at glass houses because I know I’ve been guilty of that in the past as well. Take for instance my initial reaction towards Steve in season 1: I hated his character (to the point I let it color my perception of him at the time) and only grudgingly accepted his turn for the better towards the end. It wasn’t until season 2 and the direction subsequent seasons went with Steve that I finally reevaluated his character and realized there were subtle but important details I’d missed about him on first viewing that hinted at the idea he wasn’t as bad of a guy as I initially perceived. It makes his arc in season 1 all the more rewarding.

Similarly, I look at the reception Kali got in 2017 (where fans were vocal about their hatred or indifference towards her) to how she’s seen now (where there's been a growing chorus of fans hoping she’ll come back, and don’t want her character to go to waste). I am glad to see this change, even if it’s coming after so many years. Even back then, I felt like her character and arc deserved a chance. I don’t know what direction season 5 will go, but I sincerely hope she returns and her arc gets the closure it deserves.

This review is going to be a little different in that I’ll discuss my thoughts about Kali and her gang, what worked for me about this episode vs what didn’t, how Kali and El’s arcs here factor into later seasons, fan reaction and which criticisms were valid vs which ones were heavily biased, speculation/theories about Kali, and whether Kali comes back or not or what role she could play in the future of the show.

This review will be split into 7 parts, and will contain SPOILERS from The First Shadow, so be warned!

Part 1: Kali Prasad

I remember at one point Kali being described as the “Evil Counterpart” to El. That never sat well with me for multiple reasons. For one thing, “Evil” is a strong word to use, because the connotations are that it’s something with no redeeming qualities or standards. Profoundly immoral, wicked, morally bankrupt, and having a full understanding of right vs wrong and still choosing to be vicious anyways (either because you lie to yourself about your behavior, or you just don’t care). Kali has her flaws (and by that, I mean human flaws that are developed with experience and circumstances) and has made morally questionable choices, but calling her “Evil” with a capital E comes with a whole can of worms. Not only does it demonize her while glossing over her backstory and the circumstances that have led her to this point, but it also deliberately ignores the nuances associated with her character, the shades of grey within her choices and actions, and her redeeming qualities.

If anything, given the way season 4 went, I think it’s fair to say that the “Evil Counterpart” to El is Henry/One/Vecna. He is the other side of the coin to El with a similar backstory as an outcast who’s fully descended into evil. Whatever redeeming qualities he once had in The First Shadow are long gone, and he has embraced the darkness and chaos. El has empathy for people (even those who’ve wronged her like Angela and Vecna) whereas Vecna has none. He wants to see the world burn, whereas El wants to preserve it (despite the way the world’s treated her).

With that in mind, I would say that, between El and Vecna, Kali falls in the middle. If we were to judge these characters by an Alignment chart from D&D, I would argue that El can be categorized as Chaotic Good (i.e. a character who acts as their consciousness directs them, believes in goodness, is kind and benevolent, and follows their own moral compass while disregarding societal rules and norms), Vecna is Chaotic Evil (i.e. someone who operates under selfish and cruel desires, is nihilistic, is inherently violent and deceitful, and will spread misery and corruption for their own ends), and Kali falls somewhere around Chaotic Neutral (i.e. a character who prioritizes their freedom, seeks to be free from society’s restrictions and laws, can be impulsive and unpredictable, and are individualistic).

From a writing perspective, Kali is an Anti-Hero. Since this word gets thrown around a lot (and even applied to characters who don’t fall under that label), we should define it for the sake of this review: An anti-hero is a character who lacks some of the conventional heroic qualities associated with a hero (idealism, integrity, nobleness, etc). These are usually characters who don’t do things that align with the audience’s sense of morality, but nevertheless engage in actions that they consider to be justified and operate under their own code in some cases. Anti-Heroes are deeply flawed people who are more concerned about putting their own personal interests first and foremost (which is oftentimes rooted in cynicism). Depending on the circumstances, they can make a change for better or worse.

Han Solo from Star Wars is a well-known example. Initially, he starts out as a smuggler under Jabba the Hutt who’s looking to make a profit (primarily to pay off his boss) and whose personality contrasts with the idealistic hero Luke Skywalker. Han is only there to look after himself and Chewbacca and at first doesn’t give a damn the war against the Empire. He’s belittling and rude to people, he has no qualms about killing others to survive (as we see when he shoots Greedo), and his motivation for doing anything for others is “What do I get out of this?” The only reason he takes Luke and Obi-Wan to Alderaan is because they pay him, and even when he finds out about Leia being held prisoner on the Death Star, he refuses to do anything to save her until Luke points out Han would get a huge reward for doing so. Han eventually grows past this kind of self-centeredness, with his first truly heroic act coming at the end of the movie when he saves Luke from Vader and his men, and enables Luke to blow up the Death Star. The later movies also continue this growth where Han comes to care for Leia, and begins fighting for the Rebels against the Empire because it’s the right thing to do as opposed to his earlier motivations.

Anti-Heroes are tricky to write because there’s a balance that needs to be established between getting the audience to feel sympathy for them while defining their personality and having the character engage in actions that are morally ambiguous. An anti-hero who’s badly written can be grating and make that character more of an annoyance rather than interesting. Dash X from Eerie, Indiana is an example of this. He was introduced in the last 6 episodes of the show before it got canceled, and was set up as a mysterious kid who didn’t know about his past and wanted to find out who he was and where he came from. While this could have made the character sympathetic, the show unfortunately undermined it with his asshole (and outright villainous) behavior towards Marshall and Simon. He constantly got Marshall into several life-threatening situations (sometimes on purpose) that nearly killed Marshall, he was constantly out for himself at the expense of other people (like refusing to help a man who’d been beaten, or even working with the villain-of-the-week to make a profit in the second-to-last episode), and was so unpleasant that you began to question why other characters put up with him. The show tried to frame Dash X as a frenemy to Marshall, but this never rang true, with him acting more like an antagonist (and even embracing the role of villain in the series finale). Doesn't help that his motivations were all over the place. While I still like Eerie, Indiana, and wished it had been renewed for a second season, the episodes that featured Dash X were some of my least favorite, and took a major dip in quality. He was NOT a well-written anti-hero.

I’ve seen some fans label Billy as an anti-hero, but that isn’t the case with his character. Billy at best is an antagonist (i.e. a character in opposition to the protagonist who creates conflict in the story) and at worst is a straight-up villain (even BEFORE he got possessed by the Mind Flayer). Same can be said for Jason in season 4: While his actions on the surface may look like that of a traditional anti-hero, they take a turn into villainhood when he whips up a lynch mob to go after the main characters and refuses to hear anything Lucas tries to tell him later about Vecna and what’s really going on. It doesn’t help that the way Jason’s behavior is framed heavily implies that a huge chunk of his motivation outside of avenging Chrissy is about getting validation for his preconceived biases about Eddie and the Hellfire Club being a Satanic Cult, all while disregarding any information that contradicts that. That’s also including the less-than-appealing qualities that were established in his character (self-absorption, hotheadedness, etc) BEFORE Chrissy was ever murdered.

Kali, by contrast, is a traditional anti-hero. She is neither an antagonist nor a villain to El or any of the main characters from the show. Her motivations are centered around hunting down the scientists, orderlies, and employees from Hawkins Lab who were responsible for kidnapping kids like her and El, abusing them, and turning them into weapons for the Government. Her anger is understandable in that she had her entire life taken away, was constantly dehumanized at Hawkins Lab, later escaped into the world, and saw how others (like the members of her gang) were discarded by society. The result is she’s weaponized that anger stemming from years of trauma, attempted to help people like Dottie, Axel, Funshine, and Mick in her own way, and has directed her purpose in life to ensuring those in power who were responsible for destroying so many lives are held accountable and can never do something like that again.

Kali’s actions aren’t heroic, but they’re not meant to be seen as heroic. She’s not above killing people, but her revenge is directed at specific targets as opposed to the wanton destruction and genocide Vecna engages in. She also has her own code that she will follow. For instance, she doesn't try to kill the cops that are chasing her (the most she does is create illusions to deceive them) or the gas station attendant who pulls a gun on her (whom she tries to reason with instead). While you could argue this may be rooted in pragmatism (dead bodies get attention), the fact she spends effort trying to get the gas station attendant to look the other way instead of having one of her gang members shoot the guy through the head indicates she doesn’t take pleasure in killing innocent people. This is also demonstrated when El first shows up: Kali’s reaction isn’t to immediately attack her, but to listen to El and find out why she’s there. Kali's not above stealing either, but it’s more limited to taking what she and her gang need to survive since they’re constantly on the run. Even when it comes to Ray Carroll’s kids, while Kali didn’t have any qualms about killing Ray on the spot, neither she nor her gang made any attempt to physically hurt or kill the girls, and were horrified to find them there when they initially believed Ray was home alone. Murdering children is a line they’re not willing to cross (which is a HUGE difference from Vecna).

Even Kali’s personality is not only complex, but also grounded in a believable way. She is ruthless and will have no mercy for anyone who has wronged her or people she cares about, but she is capable of empathizing and looking out for others (as we see with both her gang and with El). She has a hardened exterior brought out by trauma and past experiences, and she can be callous with other people’s feelings, but it’s not rooted in the kind of sadistic cruelty that defines characters like Billy and Angela. She’s not looking to make other people miserable for her own entertainment, and she’s not a bigot. She isn’t racist like Billy, or ableist like Angela, and is capable of both sympathizing and empathizing with outcasts based on her own experiences. Even when she’s encouraging El to draw out Ray’s death, it’s more about wanting Ray to fully understand the depths of the suffering he’s inflicted on others.

I’ve seen accusations that Kali only wanted to use El for her own ends, but that comes off as a distorted oversimplification which ignores a lot of nuances in El and Kali’s relationship. The truth is she does and she doesn’t. On the one hand, she values El’s ability to see into the Void to locate people (which Kali seems unable to do) and there’s no question she views that as an asset. However, to imply that’s the ONLY reason Kali wanted El in her group is disingenuous. Kali grew up with El at the Lab, and while El may not remember her (due to repressed memories), Kali clearly remembers El, and may have been the only friend she had at that time. It’s all but stated by Kali that a major reason she broke out of Hawkins Lab was because they separated her from El and she was devastated by it:

This becomes a lot harsher in hindsight when you recall season 4 and how Brenner trained the special kids. He fostered an entire culture at the Lab that was about pitting them against one another for “Papa’s approval” while also enabling the bullying of kids like El who weren’t living up to their potential. There’s an insidious implication in Kali’s story that a big reason El was eventually separated from Kali (or at least stopped appearing in the Rainbow Room) is because he didn’t want either Kali or El to develop too close of a relationship with the other. His control was contingent on keeping the special kids familiar enough with one another to know what was expected from them, but also subtly isolating them and making sure they were at odds with each other so that they would never rise up against him and he would be the ONLY constant in their lives (with his approval being the end-goal for these kids). Even with Two and his gang, that was rooted in the unspoken understanding that Two was the alpha male at the Lab (either because of his number, his reputation, or the extent of his abilities). Aside from El (who got viciously punished when Two thought she overstepped her place), if any of the other kids who followed his lead had tried to push him out of that spot, there would have been hell to pay.

This is a big reason I look favorably at Kali given what's revealed in season 4: Aside from how there’s never been any indication she bullied El at the Lab, Kali at least had an established personality compared to Two and the other special kids. All of them (except for El) had been brainwashed by Brenner by the time the Massacre at Hawkins Lab occurred. Their personalities had been obliterated from Brenner’s conditioning, and the only thing that mattered was Brenner’s approval and staying on top of the social pyramid at the Lab. Kali, for all of her flaws, is at least an independent thinker, is able to see through other people’s manipulations, and didn’t buy into Brenner’s bullshit the way the other kids did.

Adding on to this is Kali’s backstory and when/how she was taken:

I remember there was speculation about the extent of the influence Brenner had, given they were able to kidnap Kali from London, or even the idea there were other illegal programs similar to Hawkins Lab in other countries, like the United Kingdom. Given the revelations in season 4 and The First Shadow about how Vecna’s blood was a key ingredient for creating these special kids, I think the latter theory about similar labs worldwide is debunked at this point. The simplest explanation is that either one or both of Kali’s parents were participants in the MKUltra project, specifically the experiments at Hawkins Lab. Most likely, they were transfer students who went back to London once they finished their studies, and Brenner kept tabs on them via government resources.

It should be noted that the actress who plays a young Kali in flashbacks (Vanathi Kalai Parthiban) was 9 years old when season 2 was filmed. Given the twin actresses who played a younger El in Terry’s memories (Charlotte and Clara Ward) were around 3 years old at the time, this indicates there’s a 6 year age difference between El and Kali (which would make Kali 19 years old at this point in the story).

In any case, what’s clear is that Kali wasn’t kidnapped as an infant the same way El was, but instead much later as a kid (though the newspaper doesn’t list what age Kali was when she disappeared). Whether it’s because Brenner had a harder time kidnapping her due to Kali being in a different country or because of other reasons is unknown. What is important here is that she had exposure to the outside world prior to Brenner whisking her away to Hawkins Lab. She was already beginning to form a personality before Brenner could brainwash her. The newspaper even notes Kali was “stubborn from the day she was born,” and that stubbornness likely factored into how Brenner treated her at the Lab. I find it telling that Kali doesn’t talk about any of the other special kids in her conversations with El in this episode. The implication seems to be she was kept separate from them, with El being the only one she was allowed to briefly interact with before El was eventually separated from her. It makes me wonder if Brenner was worried that Kali would corrupt or influence the other kids to turn on him, and that’s why he didn’t have Kali train with them like El did. Of course, it's also possible Kali escaped BEFORE she got to meet any other special kids besides El.

Anyways, the point I want to emphasize here is that, despite the complicated dynamic they have, Kali cares deeply for El. Aside from being the only friend she had in her childhood before being forced to go on the run, El is the only other person she can truly relate to due to their powers. She still has her companionship with Dottie, Axel, Funshine, and Mick, but they don’t have the same understanding of what it’s like to have her abilities the way El does, and it’s something that’s made Kali feel alone in the world. Even with the adoptive family she briefly hid with and eventually lost, there are two ways I can interpret that: Either they couldn't handle her powers and she was forced to leave, or the Government tracked her down to where they were and killed them. When she tells El with tears in her eyes that she feels “whole” now that El’s here, she means it. I would even argue El feels the same way.

From how I see it, Kali isn’t being insincere when she tells her gang that bringing along El for their mission is what El needs in order to heal. From her perspective, she believes that. She knows El was hurt by Brenner and Hawkins Lab the same way she was, and she’s giving her another option besides running away: Fighting back. Making the “bad men” afraid of being hunted and reversing the dynamic. Kali’s been angry for most of her life, and the only way she knows how to deal with that anger is to channel it towards a goal. I'm reminded of what Storm told Nightcrawler from X2: X-Men United: “Sometimes, anger can help you survive.” Kali’s lesson towards El is similar: Channel the anger into something productive as opposed to letting it eat you from the inside.

On top of that, there’s also what happened to Terry, and Kali’s reasons for wanting to target Ray Carroll: Aside from the abuse Ray put Kali through at the Lab and how he was responsible for frying Terry’s brain, it's implied that Kali pushing for El to kill Ray isn’t just about getting El to avenge her mother, but also the guilt Kali feels for what happened to Terry. There’s probably a part of Kali that wonders if she could have stepped in to prevent that had she acted at the time. Granted, she was a child who didn’t have a full understanding of what was going on when Terry showed up for El, but I bet that feeling of “I could have done something to stop this” weighs heavily on her. From her perspective, she’s trying to correct a wrong that never should have happened.

This is a big reason I find Kali interesting as a character: Her motivations and personality are complex and multi-layered. She doesn’t just see El as a tool. She genuinely wants a sisterly relationship with El. The problem though is she is so damaged from what has happened to her that it’s manifested itself in unhealthy and maladaptive ways. She honestly thinks this revenge tour she’s on is one of the only ways she can bond with El, and she fails to realize until too late that El doesn’t want to make revenge her entire personality. El also doesn’t have the blind-spots Kali has: Ray Carroll may be a despicable and cowardly human being but, at the end of the day, he’s still a parent, and El can’t deprive those little girls of a parent the same way Brenner deprived her of her mother. If that means sparing his life regardless of whether he deserves to live, so be it. Kali isn’t incapable of empathizing with people, but her empathy is very selective and she’s not willing to give that to people who have wronged her (regardless of what their circumstances are), which is why she has a hard time understanding why El made the choice she did. However, Kali still recognizes that as El’s choice, with her issue stemming from El interfering with her choices. Kali’s spent her entire life trapped and controlled by others, which is why she values freedom and the ability to choose more than anything. She isn’t a hypocrite in that regard. I’ve seen people make side-by-side comparison of when Kali tells El that this isn’t a prison and she’s free to leave if she wants to vs when Brenner told her the same thing in season 4 at the Nina Project, but these are two very different situations: Brenner had zero intention of honoring his word and attempted to keep El imprisoned at the silo when push came to shove. Kali doesn’t do that. She’s heartbroken when El chooses to leave her, but she isn’t petty about it like Vecna was when El rejected him, and Kali honored El's choice to return to Hawkins even if she was hurt by it.

All of this makes the ending heartbreaking: There’s a sense of tragedy in El and Kali being reunited after so many years only to be separated again, as well as Kali’s realization that her behavior may have contributed to alienating El and influencing her decision to leave. In Beyond Stranger Things, Linnea Berthelsen noted that Kali has a hard time being able to connect with people, and that the end scene with Kali crying in the van as they’re escaping the cops implies that she realizes she needs to make a change and can’t continue on like this. This makes me invested in her character because not only does it show that she isn’t a flat character (like Angela), but is capable of growth if she chooses to pursue that. It also conveys that her attempts to bond with El were genuine.

Before we move on, I want to briefly discuss Kali’s name in relation to her character: Kali derives her name from the Goddesses Kali in Hinduism. Like the character from the show, Kali is a contradiction of many traits. While she is known as the Goddess of Death, Time, and Destruction, she has also been associated with the embodiment of Feminine Energy, Creativity, Fertility, and even Motherly Love. She is also a warrior and fighter who’s capable of consuming other beings, and famously took down the demon Raktabijia and the clones produced from his blood by consuming them. One of her defining characteristics is her unstoppable rage and bloodlust, which was considered to be so great that it nearly destroyed the universe. It wasn’t until her husband, Shiva, intervened by allowing Kali to step on him that Kali finally snapped out of her rage and realized she’d hurt someone she cared about. Kali on the show has many parallels to the mythological goddess (which was likely intentional given her name and ethnicity as Indian) in that her rage against the Government for the way she was treated has led to her quest to kill anyone who worked at Hawkins Lab or under Brenner. However, rage isn’t the only aspect of her character, and we see her ability to create with her illusions (the butterfly she makes for El) and even adopts the position of protector to the members of her gang and El, much like how Kali from Hinduism is seen as a “protector” from death itself. Even the myth of Kali stepping on Shiva and recognizing how her rage has hurt someone she cared about can be seen in what happens at the end of the episode when Kali from the show finally realizes she may have driven El away with her behavior and is remorseful about it. Just like how Kali from Hindu mythology is a complex being, and has even been perceived as misunderstood, I would argue Kali from the show shares similar traits in that regard.

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Part 2: How this Episode factors into Season 4

Like I said earlier, a big reason why this episode looks better in hindsight is because not only are there key mytharc elements that come into play during season 4, but it also foreshadows the direction El’s story would go.

Take Brenner for instance: While there were hints he may have survived his attack from the Demogorgon in season 1 (we never saw his body, and Dr. Owens referred to him as “gone” as opposed to “dead”), this episode reveals via Ray that he’s still alive. Or at least that’s what he claims to El and Kali. Initially, this episode frames that confession as being done under torture and saying whatever he had to say for El and Kali to spare his life in that moment. As of season 4 however, we know he was telling the truth.

I’m assuming that, somewhere between 1983-1984, Brenner reached out to Ray Carroll to bring him out of retirement and have him work on the Nina Project or something Government-related, which is how Ray knew Brenner was alive and where he was located. Ray also claims Brenner trusts him, which infers they still had a good relationship. We don’t get a lot of information about Ray, and his reasons for why he wasn’t working with Brenner again are ambiguous. Whether it was out of remorse for his past crimes, or if he just preferred retirement, or if he was planning to accept Brenner’s offer but hadn’t left before Kali and El showed up, we don’t know. What is clear, however, is that Brenner was still operating behind-the-scenes. He could have also been trying to restart the Hawkins Lab experiment and create more special kids, but considering he didn’t do that after Vecna slaughtered everyone in 1979, and we don’t get any indication in season 4 he’s been engaging in that kind of work (with his attention being focused exclusively on El getting back her powers), I seriously doubt that.

The show doesn’t explore this, but I’d have to imagine Brenner must have been aware Kali was still out there, and at least heard reports about employees under his previous command being killed. There’s no way he couldn’t have known, or suspected that Kali was behind it. I suggested this theory in my review of the non-canon comic Into the Fire, but it's possible one reason Brenner and Owens may have conducted the Nina Project from a silo in the middle of the Nevada Deseret wasn’t just about hiding it from Lt. Colonel Sullivan and other factions of the Government who were against them, but also as a precaution against Kali and her gang to make sure they couldn’t find them.

Then there’s the explanation for why El never investigated the Void to see if Brenner was truly dead: She didn’t want to. Kali’s illusion of Brenner may have been cruel, but she’s making a valid point when she notes that El is afraid of facing the reality of “Papa” being alive. I don’t blame El since Brenner traumatized her in more ways than one, but it also conveys that she truly hasn’t confronted her pain (as Kali claims). It’s been implied in the past 2 seasons that El is repressing a lot of her memories due to trauma (Kali straight up asks in this episode if the memory Terry shared of Kali is the only memory El has of her), and season 4 confirms that. Not just with Brenner, but her time at the Lab being bullied, her role in the Massacre of Hawkins Lab, and Henry/One/Vecna himself. “The Lost Sister” acted in many ways as foreshadowing for the solo journey El would undertake in season 4 when she was brought to the Nina Project and forced to confront her past. While it's a painful process for her, she does begin to heal not just by gaining back her abilities, but also by confronting Brenner and calling him out for his numerous crimes. She also manages to build a better sense of self-esteem for who she truly is in the process.

Following the airing of season 4, Matthew Modine (who plays Brenner) admitted in an interview that Brenner was supposed to have a bigger role in season 2, which suggests that they were going to reveal much earlier that Brenner survived, as opposed to here where it’s only strongly hinted at. While I’m glad Brenner was brought back for season 4 to start providing answers to the mythology of the show, I prefer how they gently threaded his return instead of just bring him back instantaneously. I also maintain his role in season 2 via flashbacks and illusions works better. Even though he isn’t physically present, he’s still the metaphorical shadow haunting El and Kali, and serves as a reminder that just because someone is gone doesn’t mean their legacy is.

Then there’s both Kali and El’s powers. I find it interesting that, while Kali has the power of creating illusions, she can’t exert psychokinetic force against another person. When El refuses to kill Ray Carroll, Kali immediately opts to shoot him with a gun, which only reinforces absence of that specific power. She also apparently doesn’t have the ability to remote-view and locate people in the Void like El does. Whether or not this is because Kali lacks that ability in general or because she wasn’t trained to do that prior to escaping Hawkins Lab is unknown. Likewise, El doesn’t seem able to create illusions in people’s heads like Kali can, and even her ability to remote-view in the Void is kinda glitchy, like she hasn’t fully mastered it yet. She isn’t able to locate Kali at first while at Terry’s house, but then sleeps and is able to in her dreams. She’s also able to find Ray Carroll, but doesn’t notice his kids in the house. Then there’s her seeing Mike and Hopper at Hawkins Lab and the vision dissolving before she can truly comprehend what’s going on. While I’ve suggested the idea that external factors could be responsible for a vision in the Void dissolving (like Vecna or the Mind Flayer), it’s also possible it could be from El’s lack of mastery over remote-viewing at this point in the story.

Personally, while this episode initially implies that the special kids have separate abilities that make them unique, season 4 debunks that with Henry/One/Vecna. We know he has all the abilities the special kids have exhibited: He can create illusions like Kali (which we see in The First Shadow), he’s capable of psychokinesis, he can remote-view, and he even has the ability to “consume” a person or animal when he kills them. Since both El and Kali have their powers because of his blood, it’s likely they have untapped powers and potential that they haven’t been trained to use yet. I believe Kali is just as capable of remote-viewing or using psychokinetic force as El is of creating illusions within people’s minds. It’s more of a question of finding those abilities within themselves and mastering that skill.

In any case, there’s Kali and El’s scene in the warehouse yard. Am I the only one who noticed that Kali’s advice is eerily similar to the advice Henry/One/Vecna gave to El all those years ago?

This makes me question if Vecna worked with Kali on developing her powers prior to her escape. To be fair, Vecna does name-drop her in “The Dive” (Season 4, Episode 6) when he tells El about her mother (“This would have been when Eight was still here”), which suggests that he knew Kali.

This leads me to a suspicion I’ve had for a while ever since I saw season 4:

Did Vecna enable Kali to escape Hawkins Lab?

Kali tells El in this episode that she escaped when her gifts were strong enough. If Vecna was working with Kali to develop her abilities the same way he did with El in 1979, that implies Vecna may have orchestrated Kali’s escape from the Lab. He could have done it for any number of reasons, from wanting to spite Brenner, to potentially having an ally he could contact in the outside world once he escaped the Lab. It also could explain how he knew exactly where the tunnel was that he later leads El to when he was planning her escape: For all we know, that same tunnel could have been used to smuggle Kali out. As for why Vecna didn’t go with Kali, he still had the soteria device implanted in his neck, and Kali may not have been able to pull it out via psychokinetic force like El could because she hadn’t developed that ability yet.

As for why Kali never mentioned Henry/One/Vecna when she was telling El about her escape:

She may not have considered that relevant to the conversation at the time. OR............

She may not have known it was Vecna enabling her to escape because he was working behind-the-scenes as opposed to working with Kali directly like he did with El.

Either way, it’s an intriguing theory because it makes me question what role (if any) Kali still has left to play on the show.

Part 3: Kali’s Gang and Inspirations/References

In order to understand the thought process that went into crafting Kali’s gang, it’s important to know what inspired their creation.

Two influences that were cited for the costume design and outlook of the gang were the outfits rock signer Siouxsie Sioux (who was the leader of the band Siouxsie and the Banshees) wore, and the movie Sid and Nancy, which was a biopic film focusing on Sid Vicious (bassist for the punk rock band Sex Pistols) and the toxic relationship he had with Nancy Spungen during the last few years of their lives. There are echoes of this seen, particularly with Axel’s character (who has a similar design to Sid Vicious from the movie, with the addition of having spiked orange hair) and Dottie (whose hairstyle and mannerisms remind me of Nancy Spungen, with a little bit of Pris from Blade Runner added to the mix). In any case, the idea is this group is going Punk with their clothes, hairstyles, and general outlook. While the idea of Punk is about individuality and rejecting mainstream conformity, in the case of Kali and her gang, they are deliberately trying to make themselves look dangerous and off-putting so that people will know to stay away from them.

Additionally, while this movie isn’t mentioned as a reference, am I the only one who saw similarities between the masks Kali and her gang wear when they go to kill Ray Carroll vs the ones the marauders wear in The Purge series?

Perhaps that’s simply a coincidence, but I couldn’t help but notice the parallels between both stories of masked individuals attacking people at night. Difference is The Purge deals with a 12 hour period in America where all crime (including murder) is permitted, with civilians treating the night as carte blanche to get away with whatever heinous and lawless crimes they can before the evening is over, whereas Kali’s raids are targeted at specific individuals and more morally ambiguous compared to the unhinged and unrestrained cruelty exhibited during The Purge.

Then there are the two movies that inspired the dynamic with Kali's gang: The Warriors and Escape from New York.

I talked about Escape from New York in my Darkness on the Edge of Town review when I made comparisons between the movie and Hopper’s story in that tie-in book. To give a brief summary: The movie takes place in an alternate reality where Manhattan has been turned into a maximum security prison after crime increases by 400%. The island is walled off and guarded to prevent prisoners from escaping, but the criminals within are otherwise left to their own devices. When Air Force One is hijacked by terrorists and crashes, the President of the United States leaves via an escape pod that lands within Manhattan, resulting in him getting captured and held hostage by the Duke of New York (one of the top criminals in the prison) in exchange for amnesty and allowing the prisoners within to walk free. To counter this, the Government recruits a former criminal named Snake Plissken to infiltrate the island and rescue the President within 24 hours. In exchange, he’ll receive a full pardon for his crimes. The movie deals with Snake carrying out his mission while trying to avoid being killed.

Likewise, The Warriors is a 1979 film centered around a group of nine gang member from Coney Island called The Warriors who (as part of a delegation) travel to the Bronx for an arranged summit with other gangs from New York City under a leader named Cyrus. At the meeting, Cyrus proposes a unification of all the gangs to take back the streets and run the city themselves. Before this plan can come to fruition though, Cyrus is assassinated by an unhinged gang member named Luther. Due to one of The Warriors seeing Luther shoot Cyrus, Luther uses the chaos to frame The Warriors for Cyrus’s death, resulting in the other gangs turning on them. The rest of the movie deals with The Warriors attempting get back to Coney Island while evading the cops and other gangs that have put out a hit on them.

One thing that should be highlighted when it comes to these two movies is that they lean heavily on being a thrilling experience as opposed to a character study. I can’t speak for the book The Warriors was based on as I haven’t read it, but that movie isn’t as interested in examining its characters and their backstories as it is in putting them in life-threatening situations, with the suspense centered around how they’re going to get out of their predicament. Same goes for Escape from New York: We’re given some exposition about Snake’s backstory as a former war hero turned criminal to explain why the Government would consider hiring him to rescue the President, but the movie isn’t interested in the development of the characters as opposed to the visuals and action scenes. There are some parallels that can be drawn from certain characters in those movies to Kali’s gang: Ajax from The Warriors mirroring Axel from the show in that they’re both the Token Evil Teammate who isn’t the nicest of the group (with the big difference being Axel from the show never tries to force himself on a woman the same way Ajax did in the movie), and Kali’s cynicism mirroring Snake’s in that both have been used by the Government in the past, leaving them bitter and disillusioned as a result. However, these parallels are few and far between. The point is the dynamic of Kali’s gang, which is centered on survival and evading people who want to capture or kill them, is similar to the group of characters in both Escape from New York and The Warriors in their attempts to evade danger and complete their mission.

I want to be clear that I don’t have an issue with these types of movies that focus on thrills over developing characters. Sometimes, people don’t come to a movie because they care about the characters, but more about the situations they’re in while envisioning how they would deal with it if they were in that character’s position. There’s nothing wrong with that formula.

However, when you apply that same formula to a show like Stranger Things, where fleshed-out characters are a MAJOR REASON why the show resonates with people and is as successful as it is.........that’s a problem.

When it comes to Kali’s gang, I don’t hate them the same way other fans seem to, but I agree with the criticism they were underdeveloped. Aside from this episode and the opening scene in the season premiere, the audience wasn’t given a lot of time to know Axel, Funshine, Dottie, and Mick in a way for us to care about them the same way we do about the main characters. We get a perfunctory introduction from Kali to El about each member of the gang, and while I would argue there are subtle nuances presented in each of the gang members during this episode (which I’ll discuss in a minute), it’s not enough to get people to emotionally invest in them. It doesn’t help that we haven’t seen them since season 2 with the show moving on to introduce and develop other characters.

Speaking of criticisms.........

Part 4: Criticisms of this Episode (Valid vs Not Valid)

Aside from the underdevelopment of Kali’s gang, one criticism I do have with "The Lost Sister" has to do with the order it's placed in this season. I would argue a big reason why this episode got the reception it did at the time had a lot to do with airing right after “The Spy,” which is not only a beloved episode by fans, but also ended on a highly anticipated cliffhanger where the demodogs were set to invade Hawkins Lab……………only for this episode to come next and put that arc on standby (if only temporarily). There is a tenuous connection with El seeing Mike and Hopper’s predicament in the Void at the end of this episode, which influences her decision to go back to Hawkins, but that’s about it. Personally (and this is just my opinion), I think this episode should have come after “Dig Dug” (which is when El discovered what Brenner did to Terry) and before “The Spy.” Not only would it have helped the flow better, it would have built up anticipation for the next episode when El peeked into the Void and saw Mike and Hopper. Unlike here, where we already know what’s going on at the Lab and are waiting for El to get on the same page, this could have been a better way to generate suspension and anticipation for the audience: Like El, we would be wondering what the hell was going on with Mike and Hopper and why they looked scared, which would lead into “The Spy” where we see how they got to that point. Basically, In Media Res would have worked better for the Mind Flayer arc than it did for El’s.

This brings us to the next criticism I've seen thrown at this episode: How it separated El from the main cast and how it had little to do with the main story. This criticism both is and isn’t valid. I think the premiere misled a lot of fans into believing Kali would have a bigger role in season 2 and her character would tie in with what was going on in Hawkins………only for that not to be the case. Kali had nothing to do with the Mind Flayer, and her arc came off like a side-plot for El.

However, I disagree with the idea that this arc was a waste of time. Aside from the mytharc elements set up in this episode which would prove important in later seasons, this arc was essential for El’s character development. Millie Bobby Brown even acknowledged in Worlds Turned Upside Down that the purpose of this particular story was about El discovering who she was as a person, and it’s something I agree with.

In this episode, El is at a crossroads. She’s being hunted by the Government, she’s been cut off from her friends for nearly a year and can’t safely contact them, she’s in a very contentious place with Hopper over their living situation and feels like their arrangement is not working anymore, and she finds out she’s been kept in the dark about what really happened to her Mom. She even loses trust in Becky when Becky calls Hopper’s precinct for help because she doesn’t know who else to turn to. The only thing El has to go on at this point is what Terry showed her in the vision: Kali.

When El finally meets Kali, not only is she introduced to someone with similar powers to her who helps her develop them (if only briefly), but also introduces her to a new lifestyle: One where her situation is reversed. Instead of running or hiding, she can fight back and make the “bad men” afraid for a change. Instead of suppressing her powers, she can be free to use them how she wants to. Instead of the fear of being an outcast, she can embrace it and make it a strength. She no longer has to live in fear.

However, like any lifestyle, it comes with its negatives in addition to the positives: Kali and her gang are still fugitives, and they’re always on a knife’s edge from being caught by law enforcement. They’ve already had several close shaves, and there’s always the risk they won’t be lucky next time. Even though scenes from the gang convey a hedonistic attitude (like rocking out in the van, or raiding the gas station), there are still consequences if things go wrong. They are not truly free, even if they project the idea of freedom.

Additionally, there’s the exploration making revenge a part of one’s lifestyle. Even though Kali has weaponized her rage for a direct purpose, it still doesn’t change the conditions of her situation, or her gang's for that matter: They have no life outside of targeting personnel from Hawkins Lab. At the end of the day, no matter how much they scrap and steal, they’re still effectively homeless and have no other prospects going for them. There’s a legit argument about how the Government and Society screwed them over, but it still doesn’t change the fact they’re not doing much to broaden their futures. And in El’s case, there’s the question of whether taking revenge is worth it, or will bring her any satisfaction. Regardless of whether Ray Carroll deserved to die, from El’s perspective, depriving his daughters of a father is no better than what Brenner did to her when he reduced Terry to a catatonic state, and it isn’t going to fix what El really wants: For her Mom to get better. El doesn’t get any pleasure or satisfaction from hurting or killing people. Even with Angela in season 4, for as vile as Angela was towards her, El was left shaken and upset when Angela was screaming, crying, and bleeding on the floor after she hit her with the roller skate. Maybe revenge works for Kali (and I would argue it actually doesn’t since Kali’s revenge tour has done nothing except leave her embittered while not improving her life), but it doesn’t for El. She isn’t interested in causing collateral damage or leaving a wake of destruction just to get even.

All of this factors into why El finally leaves for Hawkins at the end, albeit with a firmer resolution. One of the themes for this episode is about choice, which Kali conveys to her. El can’t force Kali to change her lifestyle any more than Kali can force El to stay. And neither of them wants to force the other. Despite El having a major blowout with Hopper, she overhears his message in the Void and recognizes that the door is open to her to try and fix things with him. Likewise, when she sees the vision in the Void of Hawkins Lab, she realizes that even though she can’t fix her circumstances or change the past, she can still make an impact on her future and be there for her friends who need her. She would have been there for Kali as well, but Kali’s made it clear that she’s set on the road she’s on, and she will not stand for El trying to divert her from it. And El realizes this is not a life she wants to have. She would rather sacrifice herself for her friends and stand the risk of being captured or killed just so they can have a future as opposed to constantly being on the run and trapped in a cycle of revenge with no end in sight.

Finally, there’s the last criticism I’ve seen (and something websites like TV Tropes take snipes at): The idea of Kali’s story and this episode being cliché. Which…………really? 😒 That's the criticism we're going for here, considering God knows how many stories out there (TV shows, movies, books, etc) have repeatedly centered themselves on the idea of revenge (and continue to do so in the year of our Lord 2025)?

Dune. True Blood. The Boys. The Beekeeper. A Song of Ice and Fire. Frankenstein or The Modern Prometheus. The Amateur. Red Hill. The Bourne Supremacy. Kill Bill. The Northman. The Mentalist (which also stars Pruitt Taylor Vince, who plays Ray Carroll in this episode). Supernatural. Salt. These are some I can name off the top of my head, but all these movies, shows, and books feature revenge (or avenging someone) as a key theme. This idea isn’t original. It’s a theme that’s been examined in stories going all the way back to ancient times, and it’s one that continues to be popular today. The theme of revenge is a cliché unto itself at this point. It’s also one that’s grounded in real-life: The idea of seeking revenge for a grievance visited upon us, or avenging someone who’s been wronged in some way. We see that play out constantly in both history and everyday real-life situations, which is a big reason why we probably get more stories about this topic, even if they aren’t original. Stranger Things may not be breaking new ground when exploring this theme with Kali, but then again, neither are the other movies, shows, or books I’ve just listed.

However, there’s another factor in this accusation of “cliché” that bothers me, and it’s specifically tied to the way Kali got ripped to shreds compared to certain other characters who had cliché arcs.

I know there are racist assholes like u/I-fuc-yo-mudda or internalized bigots like u/grandequesso from Reddit who get triggered and pissy whenever this topic is brought up (because God forbid people dare to have any discussions about it 🙄)…….but I’ve been in enough fandoms at this point to know that characters of color tend to get judged harsher for things that white characters would get off easy for. This isn’t just limited to revenge arcs, but any character arc in general. There’s a reason I’ve put a major emphasis in these reviews over how a character like Lucas got torn apart in season 1 (despite his personal growth) vs how some of those same people tripped over themselves to excuse/justify/downplay Billy’s behavior this season and had a conniption with anyone who dared to call his character a bigot. People like this like to pretend those kind of biases don’t exist, but after years of seeing a repeated pattern of this from multiple fandoms (as well as the tiresome accusations of being “woke” or “SJW” or “politically correct” whenever someone pointed this out)………..let me put it this way: If it looks like a duck, swims like a duck, and quacks like a duck, then it probably is a duck.

What's really irks me about past fan discussions regarding Kali's character (which is a big reason I'm doing this review) is that any nuance or complexity in her personality, motivations, or why she was seeking revenge was immediately dismissed at the time as “cliché” with zero desire to continue talking about it. Meanwhile, many of these same people went to fawn over Billy and wax poetic about him being a complex character (he wasn’t) and how great his backstory was (it's been rehashed multiple times in other stories outside of this show). This is despite how the type of character he is isn't original, and the theme of asshole bully who’s abused by his dad has been done to death (and done better) in other media outside Stranger Things. If we're really gonna blast Kali for not breaking any new ground here, then I've got news: Neither did Billy.

Personally, I don’t give a damn if people have characters they like and others they don’t, even in regards to Kali and Billy. I'm also not going to begrudge people for relating to certain arcs more than others. However, I find the double-standards of a POC character like Kali getting torn apart because she had a story that didn’t “razzle and dazzle” everyone, whereas a white character like Billy can have a completely unoriginal story (Billy’s ENTIRE ARC in seasons 2-3 was one of the most predictable storylines this show has ever done, not helped by the fact writers like Stephen King already explored this angle in the past with bully characters) and not get that similar level of heat from fans, to be tiresome. I would tell people to own up to their biases, but I have enough life experience to know that rarely happens (if ever). Even now, while Kali’s reception has improved over the years (especially with the direction the later seasons went), fans still can’t resist giving backhanded remarks. Take this section from “Character Perception Evolution" on TV tropes for instance:

I find this to be both eyeroll-inducing and infuriating because its fans wanting to absolve themselves for the attacks they viciously hurled on Kali at the time (which may have been a factor in why her character hasn’t appeared since season 2) while laying the blame solely at the Duffer Brothers feet, as if fans didn’t bear any responsibility for this. Kali’s personality wasn’t “stereotypical” and neither was her backstory. I’ve already explained why and how. You guys tore into her at the time and refused to give her a chance, and now you claim to act surprised that the show moved on and she hasn’t been featured since? Come on! 🙄

To be clear: I want Kali to come back for season 5. I’m glad season 4 has allowed fans to reevaluate their stance on her. I’m just annoyed because I’m someone who liked Kali way back in 2017 when she made her first appearance, and saw the potential for her character and the direction her arc and relationship with El could go……………only to be sad and disappointed when that didn’t happen. And while I recognize the Duffer Brothers are the ones who make the final call about whether Kali appears again or not, I wish for once that fans would take responsibility for the way they use their voices to influence the show. The same fandom that caused #JusticeForBarb to trend, to the point the Duffer Brothers made getting justice for Barbara a plot point in season 2, were just as able to push for Kali to come back if they really wanted her to. I hope it’s not too late, but it shouldn’t have taken this long for people to go “Maybe we shouldn’t have jumped the gun in regards to this character and what they could have brought to the show.”

If we’re still hung up though on the “cliché” criticism, then permit me to do a side-by-side comparison with another arc on this show that was not only deeply cliché, but also had the downside of being miserable and pointless to sit through (which is NOT how I felt watching "The Lost Sister"): Angela and her disgusting friends.

Part 5: Angela's Gang vs. Kali's Gang

Remember what I said earlier about how there were nuances present in Kali’s gang? When you compare it to the way Angela, her friends, and the entire Rink-O-Mania crowd were written, those aspects become apparent quickly.

Take the way Angela and her friends treat El vs how Kali’s gang initially does for instance: We are never given any explanation in season 4 for why Angela and her friends viciously bully El. They are nasty to her simply because the story needed to emphasize how El was having a miserable time in Lenora. The show gives no reason or motivation whatsoever for their mean-spirited behavior. They are simply like that because the plot demands it.

By contrast, while Kali’s gang isn’t nice to El when she first appears at the warehouse, there’s at least context provided in the scene (and the season 2 premiere) to demonstrate why: They are fugitives from the law who are trying to hide, and the last thing they need is for some kid they don’t know to become their problem. They can only trust one another because of what they’ve done in the past, and the result is they are wary and hostile towards outsiders. While they tease El, it’s not rooted in sadism like with Angela and her friends, but them conveying to El that she is not wanted there and she needs to leave. Other than that, they’re not actively targeting El for harassment because they get a kick out of being cruel to her the way Angela does.

Additionally, there’s the relationship members of the gang have to Kali vs whatever thinly written relationships Angela’s friends have to her. While we’re not shown this, we’re at least given an explanation for why Mick, Dottie, Axel, and Funshine follow Kali’s lead: She helped rescue them (both internally and externally) from society discarding them, and built a family unit with them where they could depend on one another to have each other's backs. The result is they are loyal to Kali. It doesn’t mean they always agree with Kali’s decisions (like her wanting to do another hit just after reuniting with El) or aren't above calling Kali out (like when Axel angrily demands she stay out of his head), and we even see them express their ambivalence about El openly to Kali, but they at least trust her because they know Kali will look out for them.

By contrast, we are never given any explanation for why Angela’s friends like her, let alone want to be around her. She’s written to be such a nasty, hateful brat that it breaks suspension of disbelief that anyone tolerates her behavior. I dare fans to tell me what Jake or Stacy or Chads’ personalities were beyond “Follow Angela’s lead.” There’s no reason given for why they find their cruelty towards El to be funny, or why they think harassing the same girl for months on end wouldn’t get tiresome after a while. At least with the dynamic between Steve, Tommy, and Carol in season 1, there were instances where Steve expressed visible discomfort with the mean-spirited jabs Tommy and Carol made, and it eventually got to a point where he angrily called them out on it. We never see that nuance with Angela’s friends, and the result it (unlike Kali’s gang) they come off as brainless tools who cater to Angela’s whims. They have no needs or wants or motivations beyond whatever Angela's agenda is. I get that Angela was heavily inspired by Chris Hargensen from Stephen King’s Carrie, and that the Rink-O-Mania scene was meant to pay homage to the scene from the book and 1976 movie where Carrie has her period and the girls harass her in the locker room by throwing tampons and sanitary napkins at her. However, even Carrie featured girls like Sue Snell who were remorseful over what they did and eventually got sick of Chris’s behavior because she was that unpleasant. There is none of that featured with Angela, her friends, or the Rink-O-Mania crowd. At best, writing-wise, they all come off as future sociopaths lacking in empathy, and at worst, they’re one-dimensional cliches. The show doesn’t even try to give them hidden depths.

Kali's gang may be rough on the surface, but once they get acquainted with El, there’s an effort to be nice to El and include her in the group in subtle but noticeable ways: Funshine politely referring to El as “Miss Jane.” Dottie helping El with her makeover. Mick pulling El to safety when the cops show up at the end of the episode. Axel’s impressed reaction to El taking out the gas station attendant. Even them coming to cheer El when she pulls the railroad cart across the yard is genuine. They’re small moments, but they highlight there’s more underneath these characters to elevate them beyond simple stereotypes.

With Angela and her friends, there’s none of that. I understand they were written to be bullies, but there isn’t even an effort by the Duffer Brothers to give them any kind of depth beyond that. It makes them obnoxious and grating, and NOT in a "Love-to-Hate" way either. They don’t seem to have any standards beyond being cruel just for the sake of it, and it gets tiresome to watch. I cannot recall one instance where any of them expressed discomfort or doubt about what they were putting El through, or even said something along the lines of “Maybe we’re going too far with this.”

This brings me to the next point: The moral conundrums faced by El in both arcs. Personally, I find El’s dilemma about whether to kill Ray Carroll and continue Kali’s vigilantism to be more intriguing and better written compared to the guilt-tripping the show tried to engage in when Angela got her face smashed in after El lashed out at her.

Part of the reason I find Kali’s arc (and El’s role in it) interesting is because it raises ethical questions beyond the idea of revenge: The cold-hard reality is the Government and Hawkins Lab engaged in illegal acts (including the kidnapping, torture, and abuse of children) which wrecked lives, and the people behind those vile actions were never held accountable. They didn’t face jail time and, in Ray’s case, they were allowed to retire like nothing happened. The colossal damage and dead bodies they raked up were a non-issue that got brushed under the rug as “for the greater good.” As of season 4, we see that continuing, with Brenner’s “Nina Project” and his attempts to imprison El there, and Lt. Colonel Sullivan’s fixation on hunting down El without giving a damn for civilian casualties in the process. As the old saying goes: Who watches the watchmen? If people in the Government aren’t being held liable, what’s to stop them from continuing the same programs that created kids like El and Kali, and destroyed the lives of people like Terry? Kali’s methods may seem extreme on the surface, and there’s the argument that there will always be more men like Ray and Brenner out there, but as Mick points out to Kali, their methods are working in getting the attention of people in the Government and making them afraid. It may even work as a deterrent that dissuades others from working in those programs out of fear that they will be hunted down as well. There’s also how Ray’s character is portrayed here: Is he genuinely remorseful for what he put Kali and Terry through, or is he only sorry because he’s now facing consequences from the people he’s wronged? When he tells El and Kali that Brenner is alive, with the implication that Brenner reached out to him to come work for him again, was he planning to accept the offer before Kali’s gang showed up? Did he turn it down and want nothing to do with Brenner at that point? What were the circumstances behind his retirement in the first place? Was it because he saved up enough money and wanted to take care of his family, or was he disgusted with his past actions at Hawkins Lab and wanted to distance himself from that? Did Ray having kids himself cause a change of heart or not? The show leaves Ray’s character deliberately ambiguous in order for the audience to draw their own conclusions about whether he deserves what he’s being subjected to. Ray claims he was just following Brenner’s orders, and Kali calls bullshit on this while telling Ray he knew what he was doing was evil. Likewise, El’s argument for sparing Ray because he had kids who didn’t deserve to be deprived of a parent vs Kali’s argument that him being a parent doesn’t excuse his past sins (especially towards them when they were kids) and that he deserves to be held accountable creates a moral greyness that’s fascinating to watch.

By contrast, El hitting Angela with the roller-skate comes off as less conflicting than the Duffer Brothers intended it to be, and more cathartic because of how vile Angela had been up to that point. She had been harassing El for MONTHS and no attempts at getting her to stop or appealing to Angela’s empathy and decency (which were nonexistent) were working. It was clear from El’s perspective that Angela was just going to continue with this cruelty even after what she pulled at Rink-O-Mania, and that this was never going to stop. At that point, El finally reached her limit. This wasn’t ever about killing Angela (and people who claim that was the case are either intentionally reading El's actions in bad-faith or trolling). El wanted Angela to understand the depths of the hurt she had repeatedly inflicted, and if that meant conveying that in a physical way that Angela couldn’t ignore and would be forced to reckon with, so be it. I know the show wanted us to feel bad for Angela when she was wailing and the paramedics had to tend to her, but the problem is they wrote her character to be so irredeemable that I just don’t care. I don’t care that she got a broken nose and a grade 2 concussion. I don’t care that Angela’s friends or the Rink-O-Mania crowd (who had participated in viciously bullying El beforehand) are horrified by this. I don’t care because the show has given me no reason to care. At least with Ray Carroll, there’s ambiguity about whether he’s sorry for what he did. There is none of that present with Angela, or anyone else at Rink-O-Mania for that matter. So when the show tries to engage in this pearl-clutching over El's actions while Angela is crying her eyes out, this is the most emotion I can muster:

The overall point I’m trying to make with these comparisons is that, while I understand “The Lost Sister” has its flaws, and there could have been more development with Kali’s gang (as well as an attempt to integrate them better into the main story), there are subtleties with this arc and the characters which get overlooked when fans rush to dismiss everything associated with it as “cliché.” When I think of that word, I think of the Lenora arc, specifically the parts involving Angela and her friends. Not just with how one-dimensional and unpleasant it was to sit through, but how it regurgitated every single cliché associated with bullying to the point it was off-putting. I’m not saying that people like Angela don’t exist in real life (I’ve met people like her before, and they are fucking AWFUL to be around) and I’m aware that mob mentality is a thing (I’ve seen that plenty of instances on social media and off it where people gleefully dogpile on others and harass them for shits and giggles), but it doesn’t change the fact it’s still a cliché that adds nothing new and the topic of bullying is something that’s already been covered by the show prior to season 4. At least Kali’s arc tried something new, even if it could have been polished up a little.

Part 6: Kali’s Future

As of writing this, it remains unknown whether Kali is coming back for season 5. We haven’t seen Linnea Berthelsen’s name in the casting list yet, and it's unknown if she's returning at all. To be fair though, it is early, and they do sometimes withhold names to avoid spoilers, so I’m not ruling anything out yet.

Out of all the characters who’ve come and gone, if they were going to bring at least one of them back, I would prefer it to be Kali. Just like with El, Kali deserves closure. I’ve already expressed unhappiness at initial fan reception towards her, and I believe they did her dirty by not featuring her in seasons 3-4. This is a character who has a lot of potential, not just for her relationship with El, but also for what future relationships she could develop with the main cast. I would LOVE to see her interact with characters like Mike, Steve, Hopper, and the rest of the main characters, and I would also like to see what relationship (if any) she has with Henry/One/Vecna.

For what it’s worth, there are some indications (however subtle) that she could be brought back for season 5. There was an interview the Duffer Brothers gave after season 4 aired that revealed three things had been planned out from the beginning of the show: The presence of Henry/One/Vecna, the Massacre at Hawkins Lab, and (in addition to El) Kali being one of the survivors:

MATT DUFFER: We always knew that the other kids with the exception of Eight were dead. We always wanted to explore that and exactly what happened. It became a challenge because we knew we wanted to tell that story but it’s basically an origin flashback story. How do you keep that feeling relevant to what’s happening in the season, so when you cut to it, you feel like there’s some sort of forward progression and a connection? We knew it was going to connect ultimately to One.

Furthermore, in the original Montauk Script, there was a character named Tommy mentioned by El to be her “little brother.” I suspect this was likely what Eight may have originally started out as before the character was reworked in the writing process to become Kali. Regardless, it highlights the idea that El wasn’t just going to be the only special kid left alive besides Vecna.

The reason I bring this up is because, from a writing perspective, you wouldn’t feature a character like this surviving a major plot-related event that shapes the entire story unless you were planning to do something important with that character. If Kali/Eight wasn’t meant to have a major role in the story, why didn’t they just kill her off when they originally conceived the Massacre at Hawkins Lab, and just have El and Vecna be the last of the special children?

I’m reminded of what Animorphs did towards the end of the series. There was a character from that book named Arbon, an Andalite friend to Elfangor (the Andalite responsible for giving the main human characters the morphing cube so they’d have the ability to combat the Yeerk invasion on Earth). In the prequel novel The Andalite Chronicles, Arbon had been with Elfangor on a mission to the Taxxon home world, and ended up getting trapped as a Taxxon due to exceeding the 2 hour limit of morphing. At the time, he opted to stay and become a part of the Taxxon resistance against the Yeerks. At first, he was absent from the story for a long time (this series last for over 60 books) and it seemed like he was never coming back. Then he appeared again in the last 2 books of the series. Not only that, but his appearance marked a major turning point in the war against the Yeerks that enabled the main characters to stand a chance at saving Earth. What made it work is that Arbon’s character and backstory had been established beforehand, so his appearance in the final books didn’t come off as an Ass Pull, or introducing a new plot element/character that had never been mentioned prior to that moment.

All this makes me wonder if Kali’s absence for the past few seasons is because they’re saving her character for season 5, and she’ll have a major role in the conflict between El and Vecna. Or maybe El will seek her out for help. For what it’s worth, the Stranger Things writers tweeted out back in 2023 that people should rewatch season 2 again prior to the final season airing, hinting that there will be elements from this season that will come into play in season 5.

There’s also this “Missing Poster” for El that got dropped in January of this year:

I know I suggested the theories about Vecna taking El prisoner in the Upside Down, or her simply lying low after being spotted at Hawkins High School to avoid attracting further attention from Lt. Colonel Sullivan, but there may be a third theory: El may have disappeared trying to locate Kali. Or maybe El's disappearance is what causes Kali to come to Hawkins.

All of this is speculation though because it remains unknown if Kali is coming back at all. Because of this, I’ll discuss all the possible scenarios that could happen with Kali during season 5 and what my reaction would likely be:

1.) Kali doesn’t appear in season 5 because her character gets killed off by Vecna by the time the season starts.

This was a theory that got suggested by someone in the notes of one of my ST5 speculation posts. I’ll be honest in admitting I HATE this theory. Not only would it be completely wasting Kali’s character and any potential she had in the story, but it would essentially be Fridging a character of color for the sake of El’s arc. I already had problems with this when shows like Supernatural and Games of Thrones did that, and I have no desire to see that on Stranger Things. That’s also including how Vecna already has the ability to create illusions in people’s minds and doesn’t need to kill Kali for that (not saying that he wouldn’t kill her given the kind of person he is, but it would just render her entire character and story pointless).

2.) Kali doesn’t appear in season 5, doesn’t appear in the spin-off, and Stranger Things forgets about her altogether.

This is only slightly above the idea of Fridging Kali, and I dislike it just as much. It’s wasting a perfectly good character, and it begs the question of why they even wrote Kali in the first place if they weren’t going to do anything with her. That’s not even getting into the unfortunate implications of catering to fans who threw a fit about Kali when she was first featured all those years ago.

3.) Kali doesn’t appear in season 5, but will be featured in one or more of the Stranger Things spin-offs.

I’ve heard conflicting rumors about the Stranger Things spin-offs. They recently announced one of them would be in the vein of a Saturday Morning Cartoon titled Stranger Things: Tales from ’85 which will focus on the Party facing monsters from the Upside Down in 1985. There’s also another spin-off called Stranger Things: Tokyo that’s supposed to be an anime focusing on twins from Tokyo who have an encounter with the Upside Down. Neither of these spin-offs convey the idea that Kali will be featured, but it’s possible she could return in a supporting or recurring role. Additionally, the Duffer Brothers have talked about the idea of doing live-action spin-offs, and it’s possible that they might try to feature Kali there if she doesn’t make an appearance in season 5.

To be honest, I’m extremely wary about this. A lot would depend on whether season 5 ends on a solid note, or drops the ball like Game of Thrones and True Blood did. That would automatically sour any interest I have in future spin-offs. House of the Dragon is the only exception to the rule, and even that comes with major asterisks, to say nothing about how it continues to live in the shadow of the shit-show that was Game of Thrones Season 8.

I would prefer it if Kali came back for season 5 as opposed to appearing in her own spin-off. I believe she deserves to be a part of the main story, and get some kind of closure with El. However, if they were considering doing a spin-off with Kali as the main character, there would be a number of things that would have to change. For one, they’d have to either do a better job fleshing-out the members of her gang so that the audience would care about them, or they would need to disappear entirely. For another, they would need to create an arc for Kali that wasn’t just about her seeking revenge against Hawkins Lab. They can’t just rehash what this episode has already done.

4.) Kali returns to season 5 as a villain working for Vecna.

As sad as I would be to see Kali descend into evil, I could see that as a potential arc for her if they chose to go that route. Right now, Kali is in the middle between good and evil. She hasn’t completely descended into mindless cruelty and destruction like Vecna has, nor is she killing random people out of a genocidal desire to wipe out humanity like he is. However, she is on the edge between morally ambiguous anti-hero and straight-up villain. She is deeply angry and on a revenge tour, and if she isn’t careful, that could explode into her directing her rage at innocent people and causing them to become collateral damage. Assuming my theory is correct that Venca knew Kali at the Lab and enabled her escape, it’s possible he might try to contact her, and get her to act as his agent against El. He’s already tried to beat El on his own, and it hasn’t worked, so he tries a different method: Exploiting El and Kali’s complicated relationship, and manipulating Kali into believing El wrongfully abandoned her and that he’s the only friend she can trust. The result is that Kali becomes El’s enemy and another special kid that she and the main characters have to contend with. It would be horrifying and tragic, but I could see that happening.

5.) Kali comes back for season 5 and aids El against Vecna.

This is where I hope they take Kali’s story in season 5. Like I said, I like the relationship between El and Kali, and I believe Kali should have the chance to heal and redeem herself. She deserves to have her story brought to a satisfying resolution instead of being left hanging. Like I said, I would like to see her interact with the other main characters outside of El and see what relationships she would form with them. I also think it would make for a powerful conclusion to her arc if she rejected the darkness that’s dominated her life and helped her sister save the world from Vecna and the Upside Down, all while finding meaning and a renewed purpose in her life. Stranger Things has always pushed for redemption for characters who choose it, and I believe Kali should at least be given that chance instead of being written off.

Part 7: Song Choices and Final Thoughts

First song featured in this episode is probably one of my favorite musical moments from the entire show: “Runaway” by Bon Jovi. This plays when El arrives in Chicago for the first time and sees how big the city is.

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Jon Bon Jovi has admitted the song was inspired by his experiences traveling on Greyhound buses from New Jersey to Manhattan, and seeing so many young people during those trips who were desperate to leave their situations. It’s a fitting song for El’s introduction to Chicago since she’s traveling by bus to meet Kali, and is running away from her home with Hopper because of the argument they had three episodes ago (“All your life, All your life, all you've asked when is your daddy gonna talk to you. But you were livin' in another world, trying to get your message through.”). At this point in the story, El doesn’t feel like Hopper understands her or her frustrations, and she’s traveling to find someone who might. In a way, she’s getting a kind of freedom that she felt was absent while living with Hopper (“Ooh, she's a little runaway. Daddy's girl learned fast. All those things she couldn't say.”). However, her brief time with Kali isn’t as fulfilling as she believed it would be, and we see her towards the end of the episode starting to miss home, similar to the girl’s predicament in the song (“So you sit home alone, 'cause there's nothin' left that you can do. There's only pictures hung in the shadows left there to look at you.”). In a way, this song practically foreshadows the direction El’s story is going to take in this episode.

Next song is instrumental and mostly features humming, but one I appreciate because of how soothing it is: “Outside the Realm” by Big Giant Circles. This plays when El reunites with Kali for the first time in years, and they’re later on the roof while El tells Kali her story and Kali conjures an illusion of a butterfly for El to play with.

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This music was composed for a video game called There Came an Echo. It’s a beautiful piece of music that fits perfectly with El and Kali’s heartwarming interactions. This same score was even featured in “Trick or Treat, Freak” during Mike and Will’s conversation when Will tells Mike about the Mind Flayer stalking him, and Mike comforts Will.

Next song is “Back to Nature” by Fad Gadget. This plays when Kali formerly introduces El to her gang the next morning.

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The song’s lyrics suggest the idea that it’s about “the separation between modern people and the natural world.” I find that ironic given Kali and her gang aren’t in nature, but in the city and constantly on the move to different locations. However, maybe it’s possible that the various cities they’ve been forced to run to and from in their quest to hunt down employees from Hawkins Lab (Pittsburgh, Chicago, etc) is their “natural environment” at this point. Best I can say is this is NOT a feel-good song, and perhaps captures the artificial routine of Kali and the gang and what has become their lives.

Next piece of music is a sample of one of John Carpenter’s scores from Escape from New York: “The Bank Robbery.” It plays during the scene when Kali, El, and the gang make plans to target Ray Carroll.

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This piece was supposed to be a part of a deleted scene from that movie where Snake Plissken, the main protagonist, executes a bank robbery (likely the Federal Reserve that was mentioned in the movie) and gets caught in the process, kickstarting the events leading up to making a deal with the Government to rescue the President. The music complements the scene well in conveying the formulation of a plan, and works as a nice shout-out to John Carpetner and the movie.

Next song is “Dead End Justice” by The Runaways. This plays during El’s makeover and when Kali and her gang organize before driving out to kill Ray Carroll:

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They only feature the first part of this song in the episode, and it perfectly captures the image of Kali and her gang: “Stealing cars and breaking hearts. Pills and thrills and acting smart. Dead end kids in the danger zone. All of you are drunk and stoned. Dead end kids, you're not alone. You sleep in the streets when you're not at home.” Granted, none of them are teenagers or “sweet sixteen” like the singer from the song is, but they are their own group of rebels causing trouble. Difference is they’re doing a lot worse than just getting “drunk or stoned.” They’re targeting people for death. The second part of the song differs heavily from the first part: The singer is caught by police, ends up in juvenile hall, and their prospects go downhill from there (��Behind the fence, there is no defense. There's murder, rape and bribery. In and out, burglary. You don't look so tough. Oh, I been around. On the planet sorrow, there is no tomorrow.”). The last part of the song features the singer and another person attempting to break out and escape, only for it to go horribly wrong: (“Joan, I'm down, my ankle! I can't go on, but I can't leave you. What do I do? Save yourself, you know what you gotta do. Oh, my god!”). The song reminds me of “Green Green Grass of Home” from “Dig Dug” that starts out optimistic, only to take a dark turn towards the end. In the context of this episode, the song not only works to highlight the risks Kali and her gang face if they’re caught (Kali might survive since the Government values her abilities, but the rest of her companions would likely be killed), but also what El’s fate might have been had she refused to return to Hawkins and stayed with Kali. It’s a horrifying “What If” situation, but one that could happen to Kali someday if she continues down this path.

Finally, there’s "Whisper to a Scream (Birds Fly)" by The Icicle Works. This plays when El returns to Hawkins and briefly interacts with the nice lady on the bus.

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This song has an uplifting tone to it, and fits nicely with El’s decision to save her friends. After being in a dark place for multiple episodes, while she doesn’t have everything in her life figured out yet and the future still remains unknown to her, she at least is going back with conviction (“Finding our way around indecision”) and a desire to save others out of love rather than continue Kali’s quest of destroying others out of hate (even if they were vile people who deserved it): “Love come down upon us till you flow like water. Burning with the hope of insight. Feathered, look they're covered with a bright elation. Stolen in the sight of love.” This also can apply to Kali as well in that she still has a choice: She doesn’t have to continue this life, or allow herself to be defined by her past. She can find El and make peace with her, and start anew. I sincerely hope she does.

On a final note, I want to discuss this woman briefly despite her minimal role in this episode:

While I think this is likely just someone who’s being kind to El in this moment (similar to Becky and the truck driver in “Dig Dug”), I would find it amusing if she returns for season 5 and the Duffer Brothers reveal that she’s Patty Newby from The First Shadow. I doubt that’s going to happen (though I also hope Patty makes an appearance in season 5 similar to Kali, and I’ll discuss why in the next review), but it would be funny if they did that. It certainly would make this episode and this scene more important in hindsight. 😂

To conclude, No Funko Pop for Kali. If they ever release one for her, I will happily buy it.

DUFFER BROTHERS: PLEASE BRING KALI BACK FOR SEASON 5!

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shadowthief78 · 2 years ago

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Lyney/Reader

Genshin spoilers under the cut, for 4.0 Fontaine Archon quests.

Containes unexpected kissing and the barest slightest tiniest slight yandere Lyney, might not be canon compliant bc I got stuck halfway through trying to do quest stuff and came to write this instead.

I thought I was in a bit of a dry spell but it turns out I just needed some catboy coded manipulation to get back in the swing of things. I think all three of them would be subtly manipulative like this and I love it. Hopefully I can write more of them soon :D

This came out a lot cuter than I pictured. I don't really think Lyney would be an overtly violent or threatening lover.

The first time Lyney kisses you is right after Crowell dies. Your eyes widen, still focused on Lynette's, while her brother presses his mouth against yours in a kiss decidedly not appropriate for someone the prime suspect in a murder trial. The basket of food you brough knocks awkwardly against your knees, tilting you forward at an uncomfortable angle.

The supervising garde coughs. Lyney releases you. You steady yourself against him.

"I brought you food. Freminet was worried you would get hungry," you say, uncovering the dishes. Lyney's little brother had practically thrown bowls at you while you struggled to fasten your cloak. "Some might be a little wet. It's pouring out there."

"Thank you," Lynette says, taking the basket. "I'm going to the dressing rooma to share."

"Sorry it's mostly leftovers," you say, watching her bow bob as she leaves.

Her exit leaves you and Lyney in the half-light of backstage, the spotlights casting eerie shadows on the props. The garde moves a few steps away.

Lyney seems to realize how stiffly you're holding yourself. "Sorry," he says, releasing your elbow. "Overwhelmed, I guess. Crowell..."

You knew Crowell—were the one to reccommend him for the job, in fact. You glance at the curtain covering everything.

"Freminet's worried about you. Says there's too many visitors for him to handle."

Lyney sighs. "Poor Freminet. He didn't have anything to do with this. I feel terrible about it all, I'm not there to support him..." He catches sight of you again and gasps. "Oh, archons, what am I doing? You're soaked through and through. I was so busy worrying about this I completely forgot my manners. I'll find you a change of clothes somewhere."

Someone in the dressing room offers you a blanket and a cup of hot chocolate. Lyney continues hovering at your side, fussing. "I don't deserve you," he says, once his troupe has largely wandered off to rest. It's closer to dawn than sunset and you've mostly dried off. He sits at the edge of the pile of cushions you're propped up on, fiddling with his shoelace.

"I haven't done anything," you mutter, eyelids itching to close.

"That's not true," he says. "You keep the house in order, take care of Freminet, patch up all our costumes, organize the troupe, bring us food..." He trails off looking at you. "The kiss."

You look away. "Overwhelmed?"

He makes a frustrated noise. "Yes, but- Ah," he sighs, collapsing backwards closer to you. "I really did mean it. I just... probably should have waited for a better time. I hoped, after today's show, that, you know..." He dissolves into groans again. "Freminet adores you and so does Lynette. After this is all over, do you think maybe we could perhaps, ah, continue that?"

You see his face pressed to the cushions, rough fabric against his smooth cheek. He looks at you softly, like a dream, poised like a cat about to pounce.

Him. Lynette. Freminet. They all want to catch you somehow.

#puffin says stuff #lyney #genshin impact #x reader #fanfiction #lyney x reader

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crescent-blades · 6 months ago

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[I'M SO SORRY THIS TOOK FAR TO LONG AND I'M SORRY IF NOW THIS IS COMING AT A BAD TIME- 😭 Also I'm sorry if I took to much control of Kokushibo.]

In the deepest part of a forest, moonlight hardly shining through the trees you stood. For an unknown reason, unless you knew yourself you stood in its small opening with little trees to get in the way. The moonlight shone nicely down on the ground, the levees caught in the mess glowing brightly. The forest was covered in these trees, all the same kind yet shaped differently like any other forest. Grass covered the ground and some flowers poked out, useless flowers as Muzan would say. The night was always cold, but the forest could keep some heat though, did it really matter?

That should hardly be a concern when someone is hiding behind a tree near you.

🌸💜 Kanao Tsuyuri had been sent on a mission alone, demons still needed to be killed and since she had completed the Hashira training it was safe for her to continue missions. So there she was, sent onto a mission into the forest that a demon seemed to be spotted at. She kept a sharp eye out for anything and noticed a tall demon far beyond inside the forest. The trees covered her way from seeing them closely so she quietly jogged forward, hiding as much as she could from their sight.

Thinking she was doing well, she carefully unsheathed her blade and continued forward. Changing her direction every now and then. Kanao now was a few trees away, staying hidden behind one, finding a time when Kokushibo was distracted enough to hit him. What she doesn’t know is his rank and why he’s carrying an old sword, that doesn’t seem to spark a question inside her. What matters is cutting the demon’s neck, that’s what a demon slayer is supposed to do… 🌸💜

As the demon stood amidst a forest, the trees stood tall above him, their gnarled branches stretching high up into the starry night, casting intricate shadows that lay across the forest floor. The wind rustled through the air, causing his long, spiky hair to sway, while the symphony of crickets filled the air, emanating from the small bushes and delicate bluish flowers that rested quietly below.

"—Useless flowers.." A voice echoed in his mind, a tone laced with irritation—his lord's voice—a reminder of their long, fruitless quest.

"It has been nearly a millennium. At this pace, humanity may go extinct before we ever obtain that flower."

Day after day, they would search for the elusive flora, or at the very least, the location of the Ubuyashiki mansion. The demon recalls that this mission had once been a privilege reserved solely for him and his master. However, after numerous unsuccessful attempts, they found themselves enlisting the help of lower-ranked demons.

The reason his lord refrained from involving humans in this endeavour remained unclear to him, and despite his deep respect for the man, he often viewed him as somewhat... 'foolish'. This was no longer a time for chasing after the 'blue spider lily'; those days of whimsical pursuits had long since passed—this was the time of war.

Taking a deep breath in, the upper one found himself in solitude, standing amidst the foliage, kneeling down as he tenderly held the saphire flowers between his fingers.

"Almost perfect.. until fate's hand intervened.."

A flower similar in appearance, similar in structure, yet it had little to no value that the other—useless in comparison as it served no other purpose than to please the eye—ornamental, just like the rest. How.. familiar lamentable.

He concentrated solely on his breathing, attuning himself to the flow of blood in his veins and the gentle caress of the breeze against his skin. Yet, amidst the calmness, he felt a presence. Something was approaching, drawing closer and closer with each heartbeat. A presence that seemed formidable, stronger than the rest—a demon hunter.

How convenient..

"Seizing your essence for another design.."

Hiding behind the foliage as she remained concealed, a shadow among the leaves, waiting for the perfect moment to strike. A demon slayer—her heart pulsed with a fierce resolve, one with determination and courage.. and yet—deep down it also carried a sense of sorrow. He could sense the burden of her anguish—a life marred by violence and bloodshed—a life filled with the pain of lost loved ones and the remnants of past suffering. They all carried the same story—

—Ornamental, just like the rest.

"What does it feel like.."

Just like any other demon slayer, marked by a young age—a mere child—her aura radiated the strength of a seasoned warrior. So much potential. As the man lay kneeled on the ground in the distance, seemingly frozen in place as he merely stayed there—still as the tranquil sea, when the whispering tide retreats just before the tempest's fury.

Until—

"..To be scorned upon by the gods..?"

A voice, low and quiet emerged right behind you.

//ooc: pff no problem, I dont mind! You can take as long as you'd like, no pressure. And nah, you’re good. Though.. I just hope I didn’t ramble on too much, heh.

#ʟᴜɴᴀʀ ᴛᴡɪʟɪɢʜᴛ | ɴᴇᴡ ᴍᴏᴏɴ'ꜱ ᴇᴠᴇ 「ᴋᴏᴋᴜꜱʜɪʙō」#kokushibo #kokushibo rp #kokushibou #kny kokushibo #kny rp #demon slayer rp #kny rp blog #kny #kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer #demon slayer rp blog #kokushibo demon slayer

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rubyleaf · 4 months ago

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A DREAM I HAD.

In hindsight it doesn't really matter how we got here. What matters is where we are.

It was supposed to be another game we picked up, this much I remember. Something about surviving in a dystopian setting, beating our enemies, completing a mission. You and I in different roles, with different abilities that complete each other perfectly. We've done this before.

What I don't remember is what happened next.

I look around, and the place around us is dark, unfamiliar. A concrete block rises up behind us, holding little more than a door and the promise of underground hallways. Bare, spidery trees rise up to meet a foggy night sky. A path, half covered by dead leaves, trails away into the unknown distance. The only source of light comes from sickly, flickering neon.

My eyes trail down along my body, finding a lab coat, ghostly white in the pale light. You look unchanged, but even as you smile at me, your outstretched arms change and morph into the tentacles of an octopus.

"Ready?" you ask me, your hand on my shoulder warm and human once more. I nod. It's still a game, I tell myself, and it's still us. Together, there is no game we've attempted that we haven't won in the end.

The rules come to me on instinct as I try to rehash them in my head. The task is simple. With our different abilities, make it to the enemy base. Take out the enemies controlling the area. Survive.

This is nothing to be scared of.

Smiling back, I give your hand a squeeze and step forward. "Ready."

You stride forward at once. From a few feet away I can see your shadowed outline transforming, turning into that octopus-like thing again. I myself scan the path, searching for signs of danger. Between the two of us, you're the fighter. I'll have to be the one sneaking past them in other ways.

The path I take is winding, remote. From a distance sounds drift over to me, shouts, the crunching of broken bones, then silence. Through the trees I sometimes catch glimpses of you tearing your way through with your tentacles. Guards keep running at you, shouting and armed; but their voices cut off mid-shout, their weapons falling uselessly to the ground. Not a single one of them has noticed me. All their eyes are on the one-man army that rips through their forces like paper.

Careful to stay quiet, I keep walking.

My path continues to wind. The sounds of battle grow more distant, then fade. Nothing jumps out of the trees or tries to attack me. I stay on my guard, but I'm not afraid. I've seen you; you can beat them. You'll be fine.

And then the trees open up, and where the enemy base should be, I find nothing but debris and devastation.

A silhouette comes striding out of the wreckage, long tentacles retracting into familiar human arms. I run at you, taking in every inch of your form, searching for injuries and finding none. There's only you, safe and sound, after completing our quest on your own in no time at all.

"Are you okay?" you ask me like I was the one fighting, and I almost laugh. Your chest is warm against my face as I pull you into my arms, pressing my cheek into the thick gray sweater you always wear this time of year.

"Of course I'm okay," I say. "You could've left some for me, you know! Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," you reply, pressing a kiss to my forehead. Your voice is warm as always, but your lips are cold on my skin.

Together we look out into the distance. Ahead of us, empty fields stretch out into nothingness. Thick fog swallows the horizon, pierced only sporadically by jagged trees. Somewhere in the distance something seems to be moving, but it's too dark to tell for sure.

"Let's still be careful," you say, as though reading my thoughts. "There could be more enemies out there."

Side by side we set out into the unknown. Your arm wraps tightly around my waist. Your hand gives me a gentle squeeze, but something doesn't feel right about it—like it's someone else's hand, or something else entirely. But every time I look down, the hand still looks like yours.

So I look ahead again, and sometimes, just for reassurance, I risk a glance at your face. Every time I look directly at you, it looks the same as always. But from the corner of my eye, sometimes I think I glimpse the head of an octopus instead.

Something stirs in the mist, and you move before I can think. As a blur you dart from my side, growing tentacled, larger than life. A scream is cut short. Bones crunch. Then there is a sickening slurping sound, and finally there's you again, standing over little more than a broken-down skeleton.

"What—" Trying not to look too closely, I make my way back to your side, digging my hands into your arm. "What just happened?"

You stare at the skeleton. Your voice is calm, the kind of calm you are when you're too surprised, too stunned to comprehend what just happened. "I don't know," you say.

Suddenly the misty air around us is clammy, freezing cold. Shivering, I pull you away from the skeleton, and you follow willingly. "Let's get out of here," I say quietly.

Your arms wrap around me again, tighter than ever, and we keep walking. Out here, the fog is so thick we can barely see a few steps ahead. The pounding of my heart feels too loud in the silence, the rustle of our footsteps in the grass revealing. The very fields feel alive, watching us with hungry eyes.

Out of nowhere you stop, letting out a strained sound. Your grip on me tightens, and I lift my gaze. "What's—"

And then I look down, and I see it. Your arms on my waist are no longer yours. They're tentacles, and on your face, patches of skin have changed color.

"What's wrong?" I ask. Maybe, I tell myself, it's just another enemy you've sensed nearby. Maybe that's all it is.

Your tentacled arms pull me closer. Your eyes are wide and bright and openly afraid.

"I can't change back," you say.

The cold of the air creeps into my very bones. "What do you mean, you can't change back?"

"I don't know," you reply. "I think I'm…" You trail off. "It's difficult to think."

More of your skin turns that strange color. A hiss escapes you, as though you're in pain. I rest my hand on one of your tentacles holding my stomach, giving it a gentle squeeze. It's all I know to do. Under my palm, your skin is cold.

Something else moves in the darkness, and once again you move without warning. This time you leave nothing behind of the attacker, not even their bones.

A shiver crawls down my spine that has nothing to do with the cold, followed by grief, a chilling resignation. We may have completed our mission, but our time here is numbered. The very monster that has led you to victory is consuming you now. And once it takes over completely, there will be nothing left of you.

I should run. Get back to where we started, find the edge of this terrain, get out while I still can. Cut my losses and hope I escape before you lose yourself entirely—before you devour me the way you devoured those attackers, quickly and without mercy.

But I look at you, half human, half eldritch horror, and step back into your arms instead.

"We should go back," I tell you softly. "Who knows what's still out there, and with you losing control like this…let's go to safety."

"Yeah." Your voice is heavy as you answer, but it's still yours. "You're probably right."

Step by step, we make our way back through the dark. Your tentacles are wrapped tightly around my waist, shielding me from harm for as long as you still remember my name and my face. Your face is slowly changing color. Sometimes, from the corner of my eye, all I see is the octopus.

I should run. I know that, but the thought of fleeing never actually crosses my mind. You're doomed, we're both doomed, but for now you're still you. Once you transform, I know I'll be dead immediately. But while even a glimmer of you remains, I know nothing will hurt me. While even a trace of you is still in there, fighting the monster, I don't have it in me to turn my back on you.

Some part of me wants to say something, but no words will leave my mouth. During simpler, happier times, you used to joke all the time that you just wanted to eat me up. It seems so long ago now, long ago and so bitterly ironic.

Swallowing the lump in my throat, I wrap an arm around your back and hope against hope for a miracle.

The ruins of the enemy base pass us by. Arm in arm we march back into the woods. Your transformation is as merciless as it is slow. We're almost at the point where we started again. Maybe from there we can find a way to get out of here. Maybe, despite everything, this isn't where we die: one devoured by the other, the other consumed from within by a being beyond comprehension.

But as we approach our starting point, blue light blinds our eyes. Cars have stopped between the trees, the lights on their roofs flashing. Groups of policemen are combing the woods, striding towards us with flashlights. There is nowhere to hide. Any moment now, they're going to find us.

Heart pounding, I open my eyes.

All around me, everything is still dark; but this time it's the familiar darkness of your bedroom, only a sliver of light escaping past the blackout curtains to the ceiling. My skin feels dry and hot under the double blanket. A glance at my phone tells me it's five in the morning.

Eyes adjusting to the blackness, I glance over to where you're sleeping next to me, barely an arm's reach away. Your form is hard to make out, buried somewhere between your pillow and blanket; but I can tell you're there, even if you sleep so silently that I have to strain to hear you breathing. Still there, still alive, still human. Safe and sound, just like I left you when we both went to sleep.

Steadying my breaths, I try to picture you in the darkness: the outline of your shoulders peeking out of the covers, rising and falling gently, your hair half escaping from the braid you keep it in at night. Warmth fills my chest. The urge to reach for you and pull you close is almost too strong to resist. But that would wake you, and I of all people know how hard good sleep is for you to come by.

So I simply lie there instead, staring into the night while reality settles back into me. You're still here. I'm still here. And later, first thing in the morning, I'm going to tell you about my dream. Maybe you'll still be in bed next to me, hugging me close while I rest my head on your chest as I speak. Or maybe you'll already be up, booting up a game in the living room or making breakfast in the kitchen, only to hurry over when I open the door to hug and kiss me good morning. Your eyes will light up when they meet mine, and your hands on my waist will be warm and gloriously human.

Somewhere in the dark, you roll over in your sleep, then snore softly for a couple of breaths. I try to stare at the ceiling again. My body still feels too alert to sleep, but the horror is fading from it, little by little.

But eventually even I drift back off to sleep, and this time I don't dream of anything.

#based on a true story. as in a real dream i had the other day that was too haunting not to write down #writeblr #writing #short story #spilled ink #i don't know what else to tag this #like it's got horror elements? but the horror isn't really the point #the point is trust.#personal #me and my writings #long post

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woodsfae · 1 year ago

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B5 S03e15 Interludes and Examinations previous episode - table of contents

I don't think we've heard from Ivanova's personal diary before....it's totally possible that I'm forgetting one, but still! Exciting! Hearing a personal entry isn't common on B5 iirc. I will never turn down a peek into Susan Ivanova's head.

And it's factual, bad news. The shadows have been attacking openly for ten days, randomly, all over the place. And there's an older guy looking suspicious on B5! The younger guy he's talking to I thought was Morden The Asshole at first, but that was just my moderate faceblindness tricking me, I think.

Ooooo I am excited for the return of Adira! I'm tired, very very tired, of sad genocide Londo. Let's get some character arc in here, and I liked Adira.

Wait no it is Mordan! Ah! That asshole!

There's a new alien species reaching out for aid that Sheridan isn't giving much inspiration or help to. Well, I typed too soon: he has contacts and negotiations in his toolkit of resources.

"I'm not questioning you, I'm saying you're flat wrong!"

is a great line.

Dr Franklin is definitely still on the sims, but Garibaldi should have been yelled at. The security chief has no place tyring to talk to the emergency room doctors trying to save a patient's life. Get out of there Michael Garibaldi. No room for cops in the operating room, scoot.

Morden: make your government start more wars or else Londo: I have stared death in the face and said "meh"

Elsewhere...

Garibaldi: I think you should do less legal speed and sleep more. Dr Franklin: I'm going to do more legal speed and sleep less, actually.

Delenn and Sheridan's interaction made me laugh. And perhaps it foretells of the return of Kosh to the main storyline?

This Garibaldi/Sheridan foreplay is getting intense. Garibaldi is staging a full-on intervention on the legal level. The hamfisted AA commerical is a little dull for me but could be way more annoying, as far as a storyline goes.

Morden the asshole is continuing to be an asshole, charming the caterer slash personal shopped Vir was meeting with on Londo's behalf.

lmao dr franklin. staring into the cold abyss of realizing you really really like coke.

So Sheridan slash humans see an angelic, glowing figure when they see Kosh. Which doesn't explain why the original doctor from the pilot movie was so affected by a glimpse. Me, I'd be more "huh, glowing kinda looks like an angel...the universe is weird. Stitch him up!"

"You said you wanted to teach me to fight legends? Well you're a legend too."

LEGENDARY. So legendary that's Sheridan's going to have to fight himself.

"You do not understand. But you will."

Yeah I wouldn't like to hear that after making a bargain with an inexplicable and incomprehensible higher being.

I'm too high to follow this space battle at all so it's great to hear Ivanova report that the Vorlons engaged the Shadows and were winning.

o.O they brought back Adira just long enough to have her killed before she arrived! Morden, you asshole.

Well, Lord whatshisface of Centaur who Londo half-poisoned. But Morden, ultimately, I'm sure.

Bye Adira, sorry you got fridged.

Sheridan's bargain with Kosh paid off, and now he will be alone and without Kosh's help when he goes to die on Z'ha'dum.

Which is almost as ominous as Sheridan's dream vision. Seeing Kosh, Shadows appearing and disappearing, and then his father-bit-actually-Kosh apologizing for not believing him and ...dying? Seems like if Kosh could see this coming, then he could also arrange for some like, shielding, or some other Vorlon tech for protection. But it is about time for the stakes to be raised and the mentor figure to be killed off in this hero's quest, I suppose!

The Vorlons think it's a bad idea to announce that Kosh slash a Vorlon? has died. So they're going to send a new Vorlon to replace him?? new character alert! I look forward to meeting Kosh-notKosh-Kosh.

Londo still buying Morden's shit! Londo's revenge arc is, I glumly foresee, going to include more war crimes, and continue to be sad.

Hmmm. I didn't expect Dr Franklin to resign! I'll be interested in finding out what he gets up to while he tries to do less speed.

But not in the next!

#babylon 5 #woodsfae b5 #stephen franklin

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ofdeedsglorious · 6 months ago

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"Welcome, @toadmiretoweepover, knight of Pendragon!" Llawgad grinned, spreading his hands in greeting to the man before him.

To think the shield of, what had been his name... Acricor? Something like that. To think it would have worked so easily to lure in a warrior of the Red Dragon's court! He stood from the rickety old throne that he'd claimed when this castle had been discovered abandoned in the wilderness. A slight twitch of his hand had the door being closed and barred behind Yvain, his men slowly moving in to encircle the knight. How lucky it was that the plan had worked, otherwise the message he sent ahead would have just made him a laughing stock.

"Forgive me for not having any fine accommodations for a lord of your...status," Llawgad chuckled, scratching at his stubble, "but we do have a room readied for you. Of course, should you swear loyalty to me then we can skip any potential unpleasantness. I am a magnanimous ruler, after all!" Not that he expected the Knight of the Round to bend the knee easily.

But it was always fair to ask.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was unusual for Yvain to be late when it came to predicted journey times.

Unusual, but not entirely unheard of, really. They were Knights of the Round, and usually they could disappear for weeks or even months when questing. Or even when doing a simple errand. But the elder Yvain was usually fairly punctual when it came to his travels. Gareth hummed softly, scanning the room as though her cousin were to suddenly manifest from the shadows in the corner.

As expected, of course, nothing happened.

"Speak, then," Arthur's voice rang out over the crowded room, all present turning to face first him and then the unfortunate messenger.

"I-I was ordered to inform you, u-under pain of death you must understand, King Pendragon," a curt nod from the King, "that, ah... That one of your Knights is now a captive of th-the self-declared true heir of the rule of Powys, to the north..." The reaction brought on by this revelation was immediate, whispers breaking out across the crowd. Her fellow knights had varying levels of annoyance and anger showing on their faces. Gareth clenched her fists, a sinking feeling in her stomach as she looked once more to her Uncle on his throne while the merchant continued. "He says... He will only free the captive should you name a champion from your Knights to do battle with him."

Well, nothing to it then.

"I will go, Uncle," Gareth declared, stepping forward from the crowd despite Agravaine's hiss of her name. "Sirs Gawain and Lamorak are away, as are Sirs Percival and Yvain. And Sir Lancelot needs to rest off his last quest. I gladly take the burden to defeat an arrogant bandit on the road."

A nod given with a blessing after a brief pause, and then Gareth turned to leave. To fetch her horse and armor.

Once that was done she mounted Thistle and, with a sharp whistle, set off from the castle. Powys was to the north in the mountains so that was where her road would lead. Through the forests surrounding Arthur's autumn court to a kingdom far older than her uncle's lands.

She had a cousin to save.

#toadmiretoweepover #as fair as north winds; gareth #as stars their swords shone; arthurian era #it's time for a kidnapping arc-!#yvain elder (toadmiretoweepover)

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storyofmychoices · 2 years ago

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Sculpting Desires

[Mal Volari x Daenarya Blades 1 + Beyond] [Mal’s Orphanage] [Mal Volari x Daenarya Blades 2 AU]

Pairings: Mal Volari x Daenarya (F!MC) with Tyril Starfury x Maiele (@lilyoffandoms's OC) + Mal x Tyril? Book: Blades of Light and Shadow II, Chapter 5 Word Count: ~550 Rating/Warnings: Teen to be safe, just flirty fun Tagging: @choicespride, @choicesficwriterscreations (Bisexual Awareness—they all are but this is for Mal)

A/N: This started as an edit to the sculpture dialogue in chapter 5, and because I have no restraint when it comes to them, here we are.

Synopsis: Daenarya considers a possible future as a sculptor with a very willing model.

"I don't know..." Mal gazed ahead of them, surveying the possible danger awaiting them. "If I had to pick between me or a stranger getting turned into an ice sculpture, pretty sure I'd pick the stranger."

"No, you wouldn't," Daenarya offered softly. "You're far too good of a man for that, Mal Volari."

"I haven't changed that much," he protested, his fists pressed to his hips.

"I disagree. If it were you or one of those innocent children you saved, you'd choose you." Daenarya couldn't help but smile.

"That's different. They're not strangers."

"There were once."

"They're children."

"Still strangers." She shrugged in amusement.

Mal schooled his smile. He had missed this. Missed her. "You're impossible."

"Thank you." She brushed a tender kiss on his cheek, lingering there a moment. "Besides, I think you'd make a handsome sculpture."

Mal's fingers brushed against her hips, keeping her closer. "You know, Kit, if you're looking for a model, I'd happily be your willing canvas."

Her brow arched, her eyes sparkling with mischief. "Are you sure? I like to work up close, really get in there—" Her fingers raked up his torso, relishing how his body trembled at her slightest touch. "—feel my way through it. I'm a hands-on kind of sculptor."

Her words charged with electricity sparked between them. Her fingers massaged every contour of his impressive form. "How does that sound?"

"Let's make some art together," he purred in her ear as he pulled her flush against him.

"I like the sound of that," her words were lost on his lips. Her hands tangled in his luscious hair as their hands roamed each other, seeking inspiration for their future art endeavors.

Before things could escalate further, a frigid cascade of snow fell from above, shockingly interrupting their embrace.

With a mischievous grin, Tyril stood back, leaving them wide-eyed, sputtering in surprise. "The path ahead is clear, in case anyone wanted to return their attention toward saving the realm today."

Mal barely missed a beat. Swiftly shaking his head from side to side. He let the snow in his hair fly back out at Tyril.

"My apologies." Mal drew closer, letting his fingers dance over the elf's chest and bare arms as he brushed off the frigid remnants. "Next time, if you want your own feel, just ask. No need to be jealous—"

"What?" Tyril stammered, his face flushing purple as Mal's hand lingered on him.

"—there's plenty of me to go around."

"I did not—"

"If you say so!" The rogue whispered. His breath tickled the elf's skin.

Despite his protest, Tyril didn't move, and neither did Mal. The pair stayed locked within a breath of one another.

"I tried to stop him," Maiele offered, helping brush the snow off Daenarya.

"We might have been getting carried away." Daenarya smirked playfully. "Don't tell Tyril, though. Wouldn't want him to think he's right too often."

"Your secrets are safe with me." Maiele held out his arm to her. "Shall we?"

"We shall." Daenarya looped her arm with his, leaning into him. The pair headed toward the opening between the forest and the winter world. "You two coming?"

"Perhaps you should return your attention to the quest," Maiele added, echoing Tyril's words from moments earlier. "We do have a realm to save."

The two friends continued forward without looking back, knowing their partners would be along... sooner or later.

A/N #2: the original version didn't have Maiele but I love him more than I care about canon so he is here too. Don't try to make sense of it, just accept the journey!

Anyway, thank you for reading. I hope you had fun with this silly scene rewrite/extension.

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middleearthpixie · 2 years ago

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Promise Me ~ Chapter Three

Summary: Friends since childhood, Gabriella has long held back her feelings where Boromir is concerned, as she did not want to risk losing his friendship if he didn't feel the same. But, then he is summoned to Rivendell, and the night before he is to leave, he stuns Gabriella by confessing his feelings for her as well.

But, war is coming and he cannot put off what he knows must be done. All Gabriella can do is wait for him and pray for his safe return.

Fandom: The Lord of the Rings (AU, Boromir lives)

Pairing: Boromir x ofc Gabriella

Characters: Boromir

Warnings: Pining, Battle, death

Rating: T

Word Count: 4.5k

Tag List: @sotwk @fizzyxcustard @evenstaredits @way-too-addicted-to-fandoms @emmyspov @finnofamerica @lathalea @ass-deep-in-demons @quiall321 @mistofstars @glassgulls @justfollowtheroad @guardianofrivendell

If you’d like to be added (or removed) to the tag list, please just let me know!

Previous chapters can be found here.

A cool breeze rustled through the leaves, kissed the night air to make sleeping comfortable.

If only he could sleep.

For Boromir, sleep was not something that ever came easily to him. Not since he was a child, really. But of late, it eluded him more than ever. Even in a place such as Lothlórien, he couldn't find peace.

While the silence of Rivendell unnerved him, he wasn’t any more comfortable in Lothlórien, for he did not trust the lady Galadriel. Having heard too many stories as a child about the dangers of her magic to Men, he found it hard to put aside his suspicions about her. All in all, he’d rather just continue on their way to Mordor, and Mordor was honestly the last place any sane man wished to be.

But, the decision was not his. His responsibilities lie with the people of Gondor and keeping them safe and if that meant seeing the hobbits Merry and Pippin and Frodo and Samwise to Mount Doom, he would do so. He still wasn't entirely convinced destroying the Ring was the best course of action, but as he was outvoted, it hardly mattered.

In the end, all that mattered was returning home.

Without thinking, he reached into the neck of his tunic and gave a gentle tug on the silver chain that had remained around his neck since Gabby fastened it there.

“Your mind refusing to let you be?”

He looked up as Aragorn settled on the marble bench beside him, and nodded. “Something of that sort, yes. The little ones are still asleep, I hope?”

“They are. But what keeps you from doing the same?”

“I’m not comfortable here,” Boromir murmured, still running his thumb along the silver bear. “And I won’t be comfortable at all until this is all behind us.”

“What do you hold?” Aragorn asked, gesturing to his own throat. “I’ve noticed you fuss with it a bit.”

“This? It was a gift.” Boromir tucked it back beneath his tunic. “A token, given to me to keep watch over me. Over us, I suppose, although she didn't know about the Fellowship being formed. She didn't know about any of this, and yet she felt I needed it, so perhaps she sensed something.”

“She?” A narrow dark brow rose ever so slightly.

Boromir tried to ignore the pang in his gut as Gabby floated into his mind. He’d never missed anyone the way he missed her. “She, yes. An old friend and one I look forward to seeing again.”

“We will go with the sun. We still have a bit of a road before us.” Aragorn leaned his head back and looked upward. “You should try to sleep some. And worry not. These borders are well-protected. No orcs or goblins or cave trolls will disturb us.”

Despite his growing sense of doom, Boromir managed a hint of a smile, although he felt no humor at all. They’d lost their guide, the gray wizard Gandalf, who’d fallen into shadow in the depths of Moria at the proverbial hands of a Balrog. Although he’d only know the man in passing, the sense of loss hung as heavily on his shoulders as it did on the shoulders of the hobbits, of Aragorn.

Aragorn. The heir of Isildur, who was the reason they were on this fool’s quest to begin with. He’d been in possession of the Ring. Had stood at the edge of Mount Doom with Elrond, and despite the elf king’s insistence he destroy the Ring, Isildur refused.

While he’d eyed Aragorn with some suspicion at first, and steadfastly refused to acknowledge him for what he truly was—heir to the throne of Gondor— Boromir had since come to respect him. He still strongly believed Gondor needed no king, but he did respect the Ranger and had also come to trust him to a certain degree. They were cut of the same cloth, both of Men, both ready to do what was asked of them in order to see the Ring destroyed and peace restored.

As he’d sat in Elrond’s council, Boromir would have never thought he and the Ranger who went by the name Strider, would ever be able to work together. And yet, there they were, in this tranquil garden, away from the horrors of Moria and given a bit of a respite, as he was certina more horrors lay ahead of them still.

A low, mirthless laugh rose to Boromir’s lips as he shook his head. “I will find no rest here. No peace. I will find no peace here at all.”

“Why?”

“I heard her voice,” he nodded in the direction of the woods, where the lady and her husband had gone earlier, “inside my head. She spoke of my father and the fall of Gondor. She said to me, even now, there is hope left. But I cannot see it. It is long since we had any hope. My father is a noble man, but his rule is failing and our people lose faith. He looks to me to make things right and I’d do it. I would see the glory of Gondor restored.”

He let his eyes rest as he gazed off into the darkness. “Have you ever seen it, Aragorn? The White Tower of Ecthelion? Glimmering like a spike of pearl and silver, its banners caught high in the morning breeze. Have you ever been called home by the clear ringing of silver trumpets?”

He looked over at Aragorn to as the ranger nodded. “I have seen the White City… long ago.”

“One day, our paths will lead us there… and the tower guard shall take up the call: The lords of Gondor have returned.”

“And when they do,” Aragorn gestured to his own throat once more, “will she be amongst those waiting?”

Boromir smiled for what felt like the first time in months, and it was a genuine smile as Gabby’s face appeared before him, her white-blonde hair free and falling softly about her face, her eyes that stunning shade of silver they were when she was happy, her smile as bright as the sun after hurricane blew through. He ached with wanting to see her. The kisses they shared were only the beginning of what he wished to share with her and when he returned, they would make up for the weeks they’d been apart, for the years when they’d neither one been brave enough to confess their true feelings.

“Aye, she will.” He caught the medallion again and let his thumb graze over it. “And when this is all over and we are at peace again, I will never leave her side.”

“Does she know this?”

“Not yet, no,” he admitted with a wry grin. “It’s something that I think caught us both by surprise, although I know not why it would. It has been a lifetime since I’ve thought to share my best and worst days with anyone else but her. She knows me better than anyone else, better than my father or my brother know me. She—she understands. I cannot explain how or why, I just know she does.”

Aragorn nodded. “We should all be so fortunate. And we do have hope still. As long as we keep moving forward, there is hope.” He rose from the bench, his hand coming to rest on Boromir’s shoulder. “Remember that.”

“I try, but it is not easy.”

Aragorn gave a quick squeeze, then moved off into the darkness, leaving Boromir with his troubled thoughts.

“Master Boromir?”

He jumped at the unexpected voice and an unfamiliar elf emerged from the darkness. Unlike the Rivendell elves, those who called Lothlórien home were almost all blond, and this one was no exception. He was tall and slender, his sleek blond hair pulled away from his face and held back in an intricate braided pattern.

“Yes.”

“My lady asked that I give this to you.”

“What is it?”

“I know not. I did not ask. I only did as my lady bid.” He held out a small square of rough-looking parchment. “It is from Rivendell.”

“Thank you.” Curiosity burned through Boromir as he accepted the missive and sank back onto his bench while the elf receded back into the darkness.

He recognized the red wax seal, of course, but had no idea why someone from Rivendell would be sending him a message of any sorts. True, several of the elf maids blushed and giggled with their friends when he’d passed by, but he’d not spoken to a single one, so why would any of them be writing him?

The wax broke, crumbling to the ground and when he unfolded it and looked down at the signature, he smiled.

Gabby.

To his surprise, his eyes stung as he smoothed the missive over his thigh and settled back. Her handwriting was small and swirly and far neater than his penmanship would ever be, and it suited her perfectly, for he heard her voice in his head as he began reading:

“My dear Boromir,

“I have no way of knowing if you will ever even see this, but the Rivendell elf who rode all the way to Minas Tirith to bring me your letter promised me he would do his best to see this reached you. But he also told me you’d left Rivendell, so I can only hope that sneaky Elrond knows where you are and how to reach you. Somehow, I feel he must, so I will take the chance.

“Things are quiet here still, but the sounds of battle grow closer every day. Many have left now, taking refuge in villages far south of here. Dory and I are now in charge of the tavern, as my mother and father left several weeks ago. But, we are needed here, so even if I was willing to go—which I am not and you will not scold me for it when you return—I would not feel right. The women who’ve stayed all now work in the Healing Houses and thankfully it is not too busy yet. I still tend to get queasy at the worst times and I am so terribly embarrassed to admit that I throw up far too easily at the sight of blood and gore.

“I do not know where you are, or what quest it is Elrond has given you—and I know there is something because otherwise you would have told me. And I know it must be of great peril, because otherwise you would have told me. I try not to worry, but each day, that becomes more difficult. The sun rarely shines and rain almost continuously falls now and that does nothing to brighten my mood or raise my spirits.

“I miss you. I cannot wait to see you. And I will chide myself for all of my worry when that day comes you are here once more.

“Please be careful.

“Always yours,

“Gabby.”

He leaned his head back and let his eyes close. They stung. His heart hurt. His arms felt more painfully empty than they ever had before. Once upon a time, he’d have mocked himself for feeling this way, and would have refused to acknowledge that he felt it at all. But ever since he’d kissed her that first time, he knew what had been missing from his life.

He pressed his forehead to hers, a sheepish smile playing at his lips. “I’ve wanted to do that for some time now.”

“I’ve wanted you to for some time,” she replied softly.

“So then you are not about to slap me?”

“Not this time, no.”

He chuckled softly. “Good.”

He looked about. The hobbits—Merry, Pippin, Frodo, and Samwise, were all asleep at the base of the trees not far from where he sat. Aragorn had settled down not far from them and appeared to be asleep as well.

Only he remained awake.

With a sigh, he rose, tucking Gabby’s letter inside his tunic, and walked away from the others. During the day, the woods around him glowed golden, but at night, the gold gave way to silver and that bathed everything, even the darkness. He envied all who slept peacefully, and looked forward to the day when he count himself amongst the numbered, when he would sleep just as peacefully.

Finally, he settled at the base of the tree alongside Aragorn and pulled Gabby’s letter out once more to read again. He would not have the chance to answer her, not that it mattered, for he had not the words, either. At least, not ones he could put in writing. What he wished to tell her would only be done face to face.

With that, he tucked the letter away once more and closed his eyes. They were leaving at first light and had a long way still to go.

They set out at dawn, in small canoes along the Anduin and as he paddled along, an unnerving gloom settled over him, one that grew stronger each time he looked over at Frodo. He’d asked the council to pass stewardship of the Ring to him, to let him use it to defend Gondor and had been roundly denied.

But why? He should have it. His people spilled their blood to keep Rohan, Rivendell, Middle Earth, as safe as possible. Elrond owed it to Boromir to be the one to wield the power of the Ring to destroy Sauron before Sauron could reclaim it and unleash all of its evil power upon Middle Earth.

But no. Instead, it was given to Frodo Baggins, a Hobbit not quite half his size, who knew neither how to fight nor defend himself. He knew books and gardening, tea and food.

And yet he would be the one to save all of them.

As they drew near Parth Galen, Aragorn led them ashore. “We will remain here until dark and continue on then.”

Legolas, the Mirkwood elf who barely looked old enough to be away from home, shook his head. “We should keep moving.”

“No,” Aragorn told him, shaking his head. “Orcs patrol here…”

Boromir left them to their debating, climbing up along the rocky ledge leading to Akon Hen, to go a bit deeper into the forest. They needed wood for a fire, so wood he would gather. Besides, it helped to take his mind off thoughts that grew darker and more troubling by the hour.

He tried to distract himself. Tried to bring Gabby’s face into his mind, but she wouldn’t come to him. Instead, all he heard was a whisper. Soft. Seductive. At first, he thought perhaps it was simply baser urges playing tricks on his mind—teasing him with the same lustful thoughts that swirled through him when he’d kissed Gabby that first time, the ones that made him ache with wanting to touch her, to feel her skin bare against his, to feel her under him, wrapped all around him.

But this whisper was not the one of desire. At least, not for Gabby. That lay beneath it, somewhat smothered by it since they’d left Lothlórien, and as he crested the slope, his arms laden with wood, and Frodo came into view, the whisper grew louder.

Take it.

His gloved fingers tightened about the rough wood with its peeling bark. No. He was stronger than this.

You should carry it. He is but a halfling, soft and weak. You are a warrior. A solider. A man.

He squeezed his eyes shut as he tried to still that silken seductive voice that grew louder still. But he couldn't drown it out. It grew far too loud.

“None of us should wander alone,” he said, glancing over to see Frodo jump. The hobbit looked up at him, and Boromir continued, “You least of all. So much depends on you.”

Take it.

“Frodo?”

The halfling continued staring up at him, his expression blank.

His arms still laden with wood, Boromir strolled toward Frodo. “I know why you seek solitude. You suffer. I see it day by day. Are you sure you do not suffer needlessly?”

Frodo still said nothing, so Boromir went on, “There are other ways, Frodo. Other paths we might take.”

“I know what you would say,” Frodo finally replied, not blinking as he held Boromir’s stare. “It would seem like wisdom, but for the warning in my heart.”

“Warning?” Boromir stiffened slightly.

Take it now.

He stepped closer to Frodo. “Against what?”

His back against a toppled stone head, Frodo skirted along it, keeping distance between him and Boromir, which almost made Boromir laugh. The tiny creature honestly thought that he could get away, could bolt like a frightened rabbit, if Boromir decided to snag him.

Little simple fool.

It’s yours. Take it.

“We’re all afraid, Frodo,” he said, following as the hobbit backed up the path Boromir had just trod. “But to let that fear drive us, to destroy out hope… don’t you see that it madness?”

To his credit, Frodo’s normally soft voice remained even and clear. “There is no other way.”

Irritation shot through Boromir, made his spine stiffen and his shoulders tense. “I ask only for the strength to defend my people!”

As he spoke, he slammed the wood to the ground, sending it rolling and bouncing in all directions as fury surged through him.

Do it now!

“If you would lend me the Ring—”

“No.”

The fury burned hotter through Boromir’s veins now, and for every step backwards Frodo took, Boromir took one closer to him. “Why do you recoil? I’m no thief.”

“You are not yourself.”

He almost smiled at the halfling. Almost. “What chance do you think you have? They will find you. They will take the ring. And you will beg for death before the end!”

His voice echoed around them as it rose with each word. That voice in his head was a shout now, a roar as it commanded him to keep walking toward Frodo.

Frodo turned away to quickly walk up the hill. Boromir stood rooted to his spot for a long moment as a red haze fell before his eyes. “You fool. It is not yours, save by chance. It could have been mine.”

He gave chase then, the red haze guiding him, the voice urging him.

Knock him down. Choke him. TAKE IT!

“It should be mine!” He threw himself at the hobbit, caught him about the waist to drag him down and slammed him into the ground. “Give it to me!”

Frodo fought back with a strength that took Boromir by surprise. The hobbit flipped onto his back and Boromir lunged. “Give it to me!”

Frodo fought to knock Boromir’s hands away from him, his bare feet thudding against the leaves and dirt as he tried to propel himself out from under the much bigger man, his voice ringing out as he cried, “No!”

“Give it!”

“No!”

Then, like that, the hobbit put the Ring on and simply disappeared. Boromir sat back, the red haze before his eyes redder still. “I see your mind! You will take the Ring to Sauron!” He shouted this as he looked about for the signs of where Frodo might have gone, to no avail. “You will betray us! You’ll go to your death, to the death of us all!”

He scrambled to his feet, fury pumping through him with each heartbeat. “Curse you! Curse you and all the halflings!”

In his fury, his boot caught one of the pieces of kindling and he tripped over it. He slammed back facedown into the ground and slid partway back down the slope and as he did, the voice inside his head vanished and the red haze fell away as sorrow and regret washed over him like tidal waves.

“Oh… oh, no…” He lifted his head, looking wildly about as he called, “Frodo?”

The realization of what he’d done, of what he’d tried to do and what he’d said hit him all at once. His throat tightened, tears stung the backs of his eyes and hot shame poured down over him. “Frodo…”

He slowly sat up. Broken bits of leaf clung to his hair, dirt spattered his trousers and tunic and cloak, and there was no sign of the hobbit. “What have I done?” His voice broke on the last word. “Please, Frodo…”

There was no sign of him anywhere. But that didn't mean he was out of earshot, so Boromir raised his voice. “Please, Frodo, I’m sorry!”

But the hobbit had gone.

Boromir got to his feet. What was he going to tell the others? How did he confess to what he’d tried to do and not find himself cast out as a traitor? He had to find Frodo, had to prove to him—to prove to all of them—he’d not hurt the little fellow, that it was but a momentary weakness that grabbed hold of him.

He had to find all of them

Before it was too late.

His heart hammered a furious rhythm against his ribs as he heard the orcs before he saw them and as he leapt over the ridge, Merry and Pippin came into view. Boromir landed between orcs and hobbits, sword drawn, the Great Horn in reach if he needed it.

He swung, cleaving the first two creatures in half. The hobbits, each with a weapon of their own, threw themselves headlong into the fray.

But there were too many of them. His sword in one hand, Boromir grabbed the horn that kept banging against his hip and brought it to his lips.

The bleat rang out through the forest, hopefully throughout Gondor, all the way to Rohan, and all points west, for all who heard the sound would respond. Any reinforcements at all would be welcomed.

He blew again, then lowered it, looking over at Merry and Pippin. “Run! Just run!”

They started off, but then stopped. “Fools!” he bellowed again. “Run!”

He leaped between them and the orcs, spun about to take out whatever he could to give them a chance to get away. Whatever time he could buy them, he would.

He never saw the first arrow coming until it slammed into his chest, just below his collarbone. The breath left his body in a mighty rush and the force knocked him back a step. Everything around him went silent as a fireball of pain exploded inside him and drove him to his knees.

Fury bubbled forth, giving him the strength to thrust up to his feet once more and swing. The arrow’s movement drove more heat through him, but he ignored it as the red haze fell before his eyes again. Two more orcs fell. Sweat bathed him, dripped from him as he fought to remain on his feet. His left arm useless now, he gripped tighter with his right even as he saw the Uruk-hai draw his bow once more.

The second arrow hit him in the thigh. He sank to his knees, unable to hold back his howl of pain at the fire scorching through him from the reverberations. The red haze softened. His legs refused to hold him and he looked up at the two halflings staring at him. He’d failed them. He’d failed Frodo.

He’d break his promise to Gabby.

Gabby.

“The side of my face grows hot.” He stopped and turned toward her. “Going to tell me you aren’t staring again?”

“Not this time, no.” She shook her head. “I am instead trying to find a reason to convince you to stay.”

“Gabby,” he knew why she said what she did, and it did bring something of a smile to his lips, “please stop. Staying is not an option. You know this, so please stop asking me to.”

“I know, I sound like a child and I pout like one, but I’m terrified something will happen to you. Something terrible.”

He caught her hands in his and his heartbeat sped up as the air crackled all around them. Her hands were so tiny, so soft, in his, and touching her felt right. “I will be fine and when I return, you will laugh at yourself for being so worried.”

“And if you aren’t? If you don’t?” She looked up at him. “I know that sounds so ominous and dramatic, but—”

“Gabby,” he broke in gently, giving her hands a slight squeeze. “I will.”

Thunder rolled low in the distance as he held her gaze and his heart sped up as she whispered, “Promise me.”

“I promise you. And perhaps by then you will have finally worked up both the nerve and the strength to knock me down.”

“I most definitely will.”

He winked. “Promise me.”

“I promise you.”

“Good.” He bobbed his head slightly. “Because I will be back. I have a very good reason to be, you know.”

He’d kissed her then, her lips soft and teasing and every bit as sensual and passionate as he’d imagined.

The bear medallion thudded softly against his chest as he swayed and fought to remain upright, to get back up and finish what they had started.

“I am, yes. As I said, I expect it back, so now you have a reason to return.”

“I have more than one reason, Gabby. And I will return.”

Her eyes shimmered with tears as she nodded slowly and whispered, “Promise me.”

“I promise you.” He bent to her, his kiss light and gentle and when he drew back, her eyes still shimmered. “I will be back.”

He let out a roar of pain that could most likely be heard in Rivendell itself and shoved himself up once more. He swung, each orc felled by his blade fueling him to swing again.

The third arrow sent him back to his knees as it sank into his thigh beside the first. He couldn't get back to his feet now, swayed as he knelt there, Gabby’s face floating before him, pain radiating through him.

He looked up at the foul creature standing before him, bow drawn once more and refused to look away. He would show no fear by looking away. Besides, it no longer mattered. He no longer saw the orc. The orc no longer existed.

Gabby stood there, serene and beautiful, in her favored trousers and tunic that hugged her curves and caused the most deliciously, absolutely completely wicked thoughts to course through his mind when he looked at her.

I love you.

A flutter of movement caught his attention, but it was no more than a blur as the blackness rushed at him from all directions and he slumped to the ground.

#Lord of the Rings #LOTR AU #Boromir #Boromir fic #LOTR fanfic #Lord of the Rings Fanfic #Fan fiction #LOTR fanfiction #AU #Boromir x OC #Is it hot in here?#Romance #everybody lives #sean bean

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