#i said something about steve and diego

[ursifors]

walking into jeremy's chat after months just to talk about destiny 2 and go nitro. spreading the gospel.

[catastrophicdisasters]

apologies, i'm still angry abt TUA S4

so, if we take out all of the blatant issues with the season (character assassination, 'resolutions' that create more plotholes than they solve, rushed scenes that make no sense, side plots that go nowhere, raymond vanishing for no reason, etc etc), what are we left with? let's see:

fatphobia (multiple jokes made about 'chubby Diego', when David just looks hydrated and healthy)

SA played for jokes (it's clear that Klaus having sex while possessed is supposed to be funny, but he's being held hostage and forced to do this for money, when we already know he didn't even want his powers back??)

cheating

problematic / borderline problematic age gaps (either way you spin it, either Five is physically 20-26 while Lila is likely mid 40s, or Five is mentally 70s while Lila is mid 40s; Aidan was 19 while filming, and Ritu was 34)

waiting for the actor to come of age before introducing a romance (we already know what some fans can be like over Five/Aidan, this will not have helped; I would be horrified if I found out the show runners had planned a romance arc with a coworked 15 years older than me and then waited for me to turn legal age to execute it)

sexism (i was reluctant to call it that but i also don't know what else to call it - Lila basically had her agency stripped away to become the love interest two men fought over; Steve wanted Five to have a romance and didn't care who with - use Lila simply because she was there)

complete disregard of character trauma (Klaus being buried alive despite it having been mentioned in every prior season that he was locked in a mausoleum by Reginald, including literally being left to die)

possible overstepping of an actor's boundaries (i've not been able to verify this, but i've seen it said that robert sheehan has requested not to do sex scenes?) (still havent been able to prove this; wasn't an issue with other roles so... hesitant to leave it)

actors requests being ignored (David asked multiple times if the Lila cheating sideplot was required, but clearly it went ahead anyway)

bad cgi

that awful vomit montage

Reginald (im not quite calling it abuse forgiveness but uh. it's not far off tbh)

i don't even know what to call this, but basically told the Hargreeves the abuse they suffered was their fault because they shouldn't even exist??

what did i miss? (im sure there's something)

from the replies:

the song in the ep3 dance scene uses a slur for romani people (and is also about a man and an underage girl)

SA dismissal (it's literally never addressed that Allison SA'd Luther last season. like, at all. everything's just a-okay now!)

more sexism (Allison's arc was also reduced to serving men; there's a single line to explain that Ray left, with no mention of why (i could go OFF about this but this post isn't supposed to be about mishandling of characters); even after everything, all her bonding with Claire comes through Klaus's storyline. also, Sloane is just gone and nobody gives a shit - Luther has one line and that's it??)

so many issues with consent (all of the girls shown in the place Klaus works look drugged / Klaus doesn't want to be there and doing any of that, it's all against his wishes / they all get their powers back against their wishes - although they do tell Ben that wasn't his choice to make / Klaus gets his powers back against his will when Allison is pressured to do it to save his life)

[emlynphoenix]

We now understand why Rob told us to go in with no expectations...

WTF was season 4??? (if you like it, I'm not hating on you-just my opinion)

Both Aidan and Ritu thought they were joking about the kiss until it was time to shoot and realized they weren't.

Ritu has known Aidan since he was 14/15 and they had to have a make out scene and implied sex. It's messed up on so many levels. This was planned and Steve was just waiting for Aidan to be legal. I'm honestly disgusted. He wanted to sexualize someone he's known since he was 13!!!! I just want to emphasize it. Every cast member tried to protest it, especially David.

David hated that they wanted to ruin the characters, which they did successfully.

Five stated he did anything to get back to his family (not direct quote). He and Diego had a tight bond, and suddenly his family didn't matter. Lila may have said she needed a break and something for herself doesn't mean she was going to cheat with her brother.

The writers must have forgotten about the show, forgotten about the bracelet Diego made was important to Lila. "I choose you"

Lila and Diego had 3 kids together, married, and she thought it was a great idea to cheat with HIS BROTHER!!!!! I understand they were stuck together for 7 years-needing comfort they looked to each other. That does not excuse their behavior.

I do not claim season 4 Five and Lila.

Season 4 was a disappointment to me. At least we still had Klaus being Klaus and Viktor. (I will always love Viktor)

[multifandumbmeg]

Ok. Came across my first pro Five and Lila post so FiveLila shippers let's talk. If you ship Five and Lila, that's totally fine! Both CHARACTERS are legal adults.

What they did on the show was disgusting.

And yes, it was also poor writing. You should be angry too. Let's discuss.

Aidan Gallagher is BARELY an adult. He was, what, at most 19 during filming? Ritu Arya is 35. She is a grown woman. They met filming season 2. Late 2019. Aidan Gallagher was freshly 16 years old. She has watched him grow up from his early teens to now, bareeeely a legal adult. For that reason, they CLEARLY do not have any physical/sexual/romantic chemistry, because Ritu Arya isn't a groomer creep. She looks visibly disgusted all while acting her ass off. She plays the lines well but the kissing was so unbelievably uncomfortable to watch and I KNOW it was because SHE FELT UNCOMFORTABLE DOING IT. She remembers this BOY as like a five foot two kid in the prep school uniform, right? It's gross for the same reason dating your teacher even after you've graduated is very gross and makes everyone give you the side-eye. Both Ritu and David (Lila and Diego) have made it clear they were very against this choice. It is obvious this was entirely pushed by Steve Blackman.

Now before you get pissy and scroll away, before I explain why it is in this case bad writing, let me also remind you:

It is fine to like this ship conceptually. It is fine to write fanfiction. There is nothing wrong with that. I totally get shipping their characters based on their personalities and life experiences. BUT

What they did with this season with the canon was simply an awful mess. Morally, it was just plain wrong. The age gap alone made it inappropriate. But it was also bad. Writing. As many have pointed out, it was horrifically out of character for Five. Lila's character was written wildly inconsistently this season. Neither of them would have done that to Diego. Five would simply never have made a move. No matter how badly he wanted to, I don't believe he would have even if she made the move. Not for decades. At least. Add to this the entire experience was completely unneccessary and made no sense to begin with- Lila's suggestion that they go back and save original Ben would mean she never met the Brellies and thus never met Diego, still believed her evil mother, and her children didn't exist. Lila os brash, but generally not stupid, but even if she overlooked that fact are you telling me Five, Mr. Know-it-all who LIVES to be the smartest person in the room and always has, wouldn't have even said something then?? Before they left?! NO. He would NEVER have agreed to go on that mission before even considering the consequences. It was essentially an entire episode of character assasination for both of them. If you like either Lila OR Five at all, you should HATE this arc. Five not considering fallout, falling for his brother's wife despite most of the fandom believing he was aroace the whole time, choosing to betray his brother by physically having an affair with said wife, giving up on solving the apocalypse or finding his family again (his whole mission for the entire series, his entire character), finding a way out and then HIDING IT FOR HALF A YEAR FOR SELFISH REASONS?!?! Five... Hargreeves?? Are we talking about the same person??? Inconsistency is poor writing, plain and simple. Lila, for her part, was traumatized by her mother and spent all of season three grappling with her pregnancy. She had the opportunity, and made discussions with Diego about abortion. She ultimately CHOSE to have a child and ASKED to have a family WITH him. So to have her and Diego both spend this season only saying negative things about their family and act like they regret having the kids they VERY THOUGHTFULLY CHOSE TO HAVE is just plain shitty. They could have done a thoughtful plotline about how hard parenting is when you're breaking generational cycles, but instead they absolutely abandoned it and just had them cause more. Lila runs off to do something that logically will erase her children immediately and then when she finds out Five figured out the way back she mentions Diego and her kids and I found myself yelling at the screen-

"Oh, you care about your kids now?? Since when?!" Diego and Lila literally dump their kids off with a relative in the start of episode 2 and only even mention them again to complain after that. Never once do either of them say one nice thing about their children. Never do they say they love their children. We don't see any shots in the montage of Five and Lila of Lila being UNDERSTANDABLY DEVASTATED and being comforted by Five. It's not only completely inconsistent, it's not just that it makes all the parties involved look shittier for it, it's that they didn't even do it well.

What I'm saying is-

It shouldn't have happened in the final shortened season of this tv show. There was no way they could make that happen and be in any way a fulfilling ending for any of those characters, and for that reason EVERYONE should be pissed about it.

You could write a fic where Diego and Lila's marriage slowly breaks down (or hell maybe they never even got married) but it happens amicably and they don't fucking hate their children in the process and Five doesn't have an affair with Lila, but is there in the aftermath instead. You can write thoughtful, well-executed 200,000 fics drawing out the family drama of this slow burn and Diego and Five coming to terms. Or you could write a trashy smut fic where they all cheat on each other and are assholes and nothing makes sense, basically just like the show did. That's great! Both are totally fine and make absolute sense and are gratifying under the right circumstances to the right audience. Because that's fanfiction, and you've got time.

This was the end of a show we all fucking loved. This was a horrible ending that left everyone dead and unhappy at the moment of their death. A show that was supposed to be about overcoming familial dysfunction, not drowning in it.

So yes, we're angry about Five and Lila. Not because your ship is bad or wrong. Because it should not have happened under these circumstances.

[deadboyfriendd]

Captain Seeks Mate

This is so stupid. 

At four cents a word, Early Bird had taken Steve Harrington for all he was worth. 

“Captain seeks mate– must be into pina coladas and getting caught in the rain. Mid-to-late 20s, witty and funny. Tall, dark, & handsome. Write to me and escape. Box D183.” 

He couldn’t believe himself, yet, here it was, nestled between Handyman Wanted and 1978 Plymouth Volare. The product of his own desperation, printed in Times New Roman– staring him in the face for this Sunday’s very own Early Bird edition. He wondered where it had all gone wrong, wondered where he went from Steve Harrington, local heartthrob, to an ad in the personal column of the absolute rag sheet that The Early Bird had always been. 

He wanted to blame Scoops Ahoy, those stupid little shorts and sailor hat. He wanted to blame Nancy Wheeler, who made him out to be an absolute idiot– No, he shook his head, you did that to yourself. 

And then he thought about you, golden under the blistering sun of Phoenix, Arizona. Arizona State University wreaked havoc on this life and he left with a minor in possession, 36 C-average credits in Business Administration, and a heart kicked directly in the ass. He wanted to blame you, he wanted to blame his father for sending him there– his own alma mater, he wanted to blame W. P. Carey himself, but even Steve wasn’t stupid enough to try to push this on someone else. 

Stupid, but not that stupid. 

It had been three years, and Steve had found himself settling into the comforts of blissful, beautiful stagnation. His apartment was nice– far nicer than his current job would allow him, thanks, Robin. 

It wasn’t like he frequented this place often. His home was adrift, on board The Lady May. It was an inherent truth that Steve belonged on a boat, preferably in the absence of a shirt– and this job had been the calling of a lifetime. Where Steve had struggled in the areas of statistics and business analytics, he learned the laws of the sea, learned the fishing regulations and how these animals functioned. Now, Steve got to live life as slow as the rolling waves of San Diego would take him. For that, he was thankful. 

“You’re seriously advertising yourself in the paper now?” Robin asked him, her eyes peering over the top of the paper with both wonder and disgust, “Do I dare bring back the board?” 

“What?” Steve asked her, turning around from his barstool. 

“Captain seeks mate, Steven? This has you written all over it.” 

“Why are you even reading the personal column?” 

“Because I like to laugh at them.” She said to him with her brow raised. Her hand came down to gesture at those horrible, ambiguously worded advertisements, “But this? This is just sad.” 

He reached over to her, snatching the paper from her hands. He unfolded his glasses, letting them sit low against his nose, now unabashed by his need for them– his unyielding desire to see outweighing the once debilitating vanity that overtook his ability to simply wear them. Robin never pointed this out, she was just glad to see him doing something for himself for once. But this? There was no way she was letting this die. 

He read the paper with his brow furrowed, feigning confusion and nonchalance. Perhaps he could play this off, but there was nothing he was able to skirt past her. 

“Nope. Not me.” He started, face stone cold. It was an immediate sellout, but Robin was feeling generous today. She would let him have this. 

As he handed her the paper back, she gave him a sideways glance through a raised brow, wondering what had ever prompted him to be this desperate. Maybe he had finally gone crazy, all of those hours on the water finally turning him into a regular Castaway.  

+

This is the most ridiculous thing you’ve ever seen. 

Well, second most. The first had been moving to San Diego to cut your teeth on some rag sheet with the promise of being the sole graphic designer. Something new and exciting. You could do new and exciting, you tried to convince yourself of this. You had graduated summa cum laude from one of the top ten design schools in the country– you just didn’t mention that that had been Arizona State and you had also gotten a minor in underage drinking. New and exciting was your game. 

But this? This had been one of the most entertaining things you had ever seen, staring you right in the face. You couldn’t stop the laugh that tumbled from your lips, drawing looks from the editors perched at their beige desks like the world's most modern gargoyles. Had no one else seen this? 

“Captain seeks mate– must be into pina coladas and getting caught in the rain. Mid-to-late 20s, witty and funny. Tall, dark, & handsome. Write to me and escape. Box D183.” 

It had been three years since Steve had disappeared without a trace, your golden boy under the glowing sun of your homeland. He was the greatest gem the Midwest had to offer, a diamond in the rough. Gold-skinned and eager, with a laugh like sunshine and a touch like Midas, gone back home with little to no warning. Your heart had been shattered in the process, manifesting itself in a nose to the grindstone and an early release of a BS in graphic design. The sun stung too much in his absence. You’d needed something frigid. 

Or maybe you’d been frigid enough. 

You rolled your shoulders at your desk, the cramping in your neck signaling the end of the work day and your ticket out of here– your home the promised land of naproxen and that waning bottle of Don Julio 70, a gem you’d grown to love an appreciate with all of your newfound adult money. 

You’d drained the last of your savings on a (most-likely overpriced) two bedroom a block away from the ragged coastlines of La Jolla Cove, where, every morning, you would watch the run rise along the tide pools where you’d tote your lukewarm mug of coconut cold brew, and watch the sun set over a rocky shore. It was a slow life, and you’d liked it that way. 

But tonight, as you watched the boats bob back and forth in the orange glow of the marina, you couldn’t help but to feel a semblance of nagging withing you. 

Captain Seeks Mate. 

It was ridiculous. It was stupid. But maybe something ridiculous and stupid was what you needed. Something with no pressure, something that was fun. Something that wouldn’t shatter your heart into another million pieces when it would disappear. 

So here you were, stupidly folded into a stupid, ridiculous pile at your stupid counter, drafting a big dumb letter on to a piece of paper: 

 Hello tall, dark, and handsome. 

I am writing in response to your ad in the personal columns of The Early Bird from the Sunday, June 27th edition. Three years ago, my heart was broken by another tall, dark, and handsome type. I read that the ocean heals, so I traded my land legs for sea, and now I seek a captain to guide me to smoother waters. 

 I will spare the formalities. I am not into hiking or health food. I live a life of comfort and leisure. I eat when I am hungry and drink when I am thirsty. I like to live my life in good company between work days, and you seem like the company I’d like to keep.

I am particularly fond of getting caught in the rain– when it happens, that is. I hail from the desert southwest, and I thrive on sunshine and sand. I live quietly. I like to read and paint. I keep houseplants. I am nobody’s poet, but I’m into champagne. 

I want to meet you. I want to cut through all of this red tape. 

It is true, I like pina coladas, though I prefer a tequila sunrise at the best of times. The Pisces bar on Mission and El Camino De Playa conveniently has both. Meet me there at tomorrow, noon. 

Sincerely, 

Tequila Sunrise

Box 1751.

[tinned-beef]

So many people are saying that maybe Diego will die and then Five and Lila will be together do you think that's true based on what you've seen?? 😭😭😭

lmaoooo good question anon. this one is particularly funny to me because i just really don’t think it’s going to happen (or at least i very strongly hope not)

i’m assuming diego is going to get the fake death this season (in the past 3 seasons at least one umbrella has a ‘fake death’ near the end of the season: allison in s1, ben in s2, luther in s3). but this is just my assumption based on how the tua instagram and promos seem to be teasing it. also steve blackman has said multiple times that this is a happy ending! (i think) so it’s pretttyyyy safe to say that most of, if not all of the umbrellas will make it out alive.

while in the first episode diego is led to believe that lila is maybe cheating on him with five, i personally didn’t see any romantic subtext hinted between the two at all. they work REALLY well as friends and as much as the writers are iffy on the characters sometimes i really don’t think they’d do this. it’s also just- straight up weird? five is physically 19/20 in s4 and is still very much a 60 (ish… this is debatable) year old man mentally. on the other hand lila is 35? 36? even ignoring their personalities and character traits, the age gap is just weird.

anyways anon the main bit of evidence i can give you is that during their dinner lila specifically complains about how hard it is being a mother and wife and five responds with something about being thankful he never got married (delores erasure but. okay.) this explanation is a bit biased because putting lila and five in a romantic relationship is something that just might ruin the show for me, but i am trusting that the writers wouldn’t do something like that. i am very strongly hoping that diego and lila are endgame, and if not, then let lila be a strong independent woman herself 🙏

[callsignspark]

change your ticket home

a top gun maverick AU

pairing: Bradley Bradshaw x Sherrie McHone (fem!OC)

summary: After a successful business trip on the West Coast, two Wells Corporation engineers have problems getting back home. Thank god for Bradley Bradshaw, a man who is determined to make their hours waiting in the terminal as enjoyable as possible. And if he and his pretty travel companion (and colleague) get closer along the way? Well that’s just a bonus.

warnings: difficulties of being a woman in a male-dominated field, minor misogyny from coworkers, yearning, pining, Bradley being an absolute sweetheart, it's vaguely alluded to but Sherrie is named after the Steve Perry song, American Airlines bashing bc this fic is based on a real and horrible experience I had a few years ago. and yes, the title is from the one direction song.

word count: 9.8k | masterlist

note: happy saturday! this has been in the works for almost a year and I'm so thrilled to finally be sharing it! this is dedicated to @gretagerwigsmuse, who gave so many wonderful ideas and has continually been a cheerleader for this fic. happy birthday!

Friday, July 15, 2016 | 06:36 AM PST | San Diego, CA

“If I fake a heart attack, we can get out of this meeting, right?”

She looks over at Bradley sprawled in the uncomfortable café chair in his navy suit, his arm slung over the back of her chair. He’s down to just his crisp, white button-up, jacket, and tie abandoned within the first ten minutes of the call.

“Suck it up, we’re almost done.” She rolls her eyes. “And Martin knows you’re a supremely healthy thirty-two-year-old, so no, I don’t think that will work.”

“Sherrie…” His whine is cut off by her hand covering his mouth as she unmutes her microphone and mentally praises his decision to sit so close to her. Not having to pull out both laptops was just an additional perk on top of her ability to silence him.

“That’s correct, Sean. We got them to agree to a small batch trail run for the connectors. We’ll be working together on running them through environmental testing before committing to a full contract.”

“And why are they agreeing to that? Because frankly, it makes no sense to me why they would want to do that.”

Bradley straightens up, his eyes narrowing at the Teams box showing the older man’s initials. “Well, Sean, as Sherrie explained before. Harris hasn’t produced connectors like this before, and they’re interested in the test results, specifically the shock data. So they agreed to take on half the burden so they can use the information for their own use. If this works how we think it will, this will be a huge boost for their business, even if the patent is shared.”

She looks at him, half admonishment and half appreciation, always a little bit amazed when he had her back, no matter how many times he had done it. “The contracts team is drawing up the final agreements and negotiating with their team next week, so best case scenario is we have reports with usable data by the end of the summer. Worst case, it’ll drift into the middle of Q1.”

“That’s great work you guys did out there, thank you. Alright, I think that covers everything we had to talk about today. McHone, Bradshaw - have a safe flight back, and everyone have a good weekend!” Martin ends the call before anyone can add anything.

Bradley laughs. “God, he’s just as sick of Sean as I am. I can’t wait until he retires.”

“He’s not that bad; you’re just grumpy because you had to dress up for the staff meeting, and then Martin said cameras off today.”

“I am upset about that! I will be logging yet another suggestion that we should have casual Fridays and casual travel policy. But I’m more upset because he talks down to you all the time! Like you haven’t been carrying this department on your back since we started ten years ago!”

“Carrying is an exaggeration, Bradley.” She looks up from where she’s putting her laptop away. “I think you have time to change into something comfy before we board.”

“American Airlines Flight 2307 from San Diego to Charlotte, Boarding Group A can now board.”

“Or not.” She giggles as he groans, reaching over to pull her other air pod out of his ear. “Come on, it’s a long flight; you can sleep on the plane. Just be thankful you’re not wearing an underwire bra and heels.”

“I don’t know how you do that.” He mutters, shooing her away when she tries to pick up her carry-on, throwing it over his shoulder alongside his own.

“I don’t either. I’m going to get a massage when we get back to Boston.”

“Ohhh, a massage sounds nice.” He subtly sticks his elbow out for her grab, which she gratefully does, letting his tall frame guide her to their gate. “You know you didn’t have to wear heels, right?”

“You should shut up while I’m still thankful you yelled at Sean for me.”

“Yes, ma’am.”

Sherrie leans her head on his arm as they wait in the priority boarding line, one of the perks of traveling on the company’s dime. Normally, she would worry about being more professional while carrying her work bag that had the Wells Corporation logo embroidered on it, but she can’t bring herself to care. Yesterday’s meetings ran late, and the following client dinner had kept them out until almost midnight. After packing, going to bed late, and having to get up at 3:30AM to get to the airport, she was exhausted.

She takes her bag before they scan their tickets, not fighting when he grabs it again on their walk down the jet bridge.

“Where are you sitting again?”

“I’m in 16C.” She snorts at Bradley’s pout. “What? You knew we weren’t going to be sitting together.”

“But I’m going to be bored all the way back in 21D by myself.”

“Bud, you’re going to fall asleep in the first 30 minutes like you always do, and then I would be stuck for the next four hours with you leaning and drooling on me.”

Bradley whips his head around, “That is a baseless accusation. I do not drool!”

“You 100% definitely do drool, I’ve seen it.” Her smirk widens when his attempt to fight back is cut off by the flight attendants greeting them.

He ushers Sherrie on first, politely nodding to the flight crew before following her down the aisle, ducking down to whisper. “I do not drool.”

“You absolutely do drool. You also snore.”

She can feel eyes on them as they shuffle down the aisle, making eye contact with an older woman who raises her eyebrows in appreciation at the hunk of a man behind her.

This happens everywhere they go.

Bradley is such a gentleman, always opening doors and carrying her bags, that people never believe the two are just friends and coworkers. She’s had complete strangers fight with her when she says there’s nothing between them. Unable to accept that it’s just platonic.

As much as she wishes it could be more.

After years of learning all the little details of each other, she knows they would be good together. Their decade-long friendship allowing her to thoroughly analyze how well their personalities would mesh. They share the same beliefs and have the same interests; they even have overlapping friend groups. They’re made for each other.

On paper.

In reality, it will never happen.

She won’t let it.

“Is this good here?” Bradley’s question interrupts her weekly internal spiral; his big brown eyes blink at her over his shoulder as he puts her bag into the overhead compartment.

“That’s fine. Can you grab my water bottle out of the side pocket?

“Here ya go, ma’am. I’ll meet you by the water foundation when we land, okay?”

She nods, smiling as he hustles back to his seat to avoid a family almost flattening him in their haste to get to their assigned seats.

Her seat neighbors haven’t arrived yet, so Sherrie sits down without bothering to buckle, tucking her work bag under the row in front of her after pulling out her plane kit. Her pencil case from college that she’s repurposed to hold her headphones, phone charger, gum, hand sanitizer, and a few other small necessities.

Her phone buzzes as she’s storing her water bottle and the little bag away in the pocket of the seat in front of her.

Bradley is woken up by his seat neighbor hitting his arm as he reaches to grab a drink, nodding at the guy’s apologetic face before trying to get comfortable again. Alan talked way too much at dinner last night, and it was a struggle to stay awake during the project manager’s third round of gushing over how brilliant and profitable Sherrie’s proposal would be for both companies.

“Sir? This is for you, do you want it?” The muffled question is accompanied by someone shaking his shoulder. He peels open his eyes to see the flight attendant holding out two packets of Biscoff cookies.

His face must be confused enough for the short woman to take pity on him. “Your friend up there said these are your favorite and asked me to give hers to you.”

His heart warms up, taking the treats and saying thank you. He enjoys the cookies, washing them down with the ginger ale he also got, thinking about how well Sherrie knows him. He forces himself to wait for them to finish snack service before he gets up to use the restroom.

“Thank you.” Bradley revels in the way Sherrie jumps when he pops her headphone out, purposefully brushing his lips against her ear. “Hmmm, you were right, your seatmate is cute.”

She glares up at him, a smile threatening to break through. “Isn’t he? He fell asleep five minutes after take off, just like you.”

“Yet, another baseless accusation!”

“I heard you snoring.”

“You shouldn’t lie in front of small children.”

“His mom said he’s seven months old; I don’t think we have to be concerned about teaching him to lie while he’s still in a car seat.”

“Probably shouldn’t chance it, though. Say I don’t snore.”

“You just said I shouldn’t lie. Should probably go to the bathroom before you start holding up traffic.” She puts her headphone back in, wiggling her fingers at him before going back to reading on her phone.

It gives him the strangest sense of déjà vu.

Tuesday, March 25, 2005 | 10:43 AM EST | Charlottesville, VA

“…and he said you had already-” Bradley cuts himself off, realizing she can’t hear him. He chuckles; he should have known better than to just walk up and start talking.

He doesn’t know Sherrie McHone very well. They had taken all the freshman intro to engineering requirements together, and this year their classes had split into their chosen disciplines. His mechanical, hers electrical. But he knows her well enough to know that she can pretty much only be found without her headphones during class.

He remembers the first time they spoke last semester after he accidentally walked right into her. He had told Danny it’s because she’s so much shorter than him, but it’s really because he wasn't paying attention.

Sherrie had only taken one earpiece out to make sure he was okay before continuing onto her class, seamlessly weaving between upperclassmen as she shoved her headphone back in.

“Sherrie?” No response.

He lets out a tiny huff and checks his watch. Normally, he wouldn’t care that she’s clueless to his existence even as he’s right beside her, but he’s got a class soon, and he’s still two buildings away. So he does the only thing he can.

He pops her headphones out and steps back for fear of getting smacked.

Her head whips up, narrowing in on him freakishly fast. “What the fuck, Bradshaw?”

He’s surprised to learn that she knows his name.

“Sorry, Sherrie! I’ve been trying to talk to you for like five minutes, and you somehow haven’t noticed, but I’ve got class in 15 minutes, so I needed to get your attention.”

“Oh…” Her green eyes widen in surprise, the apples of her cheeks turning a light pink. “Sorry about that. What did you need? Wait. How did you find me?”

A fair question.

“Khondker told me where you sit.” He partially fibs.

All semester he had been watching her disappear after EE221, the one class they shared. It had taken him a while, but he was pretty sure he had found her secret study nook in the electrical engineering wing of the building. Their TA had only confirmed Bradley’s theory of where he could find his fellow sophomore.

“I don’t understand this last section we’ve been learning, and Khondker said you had already finished the homework and could help me. So could you?”

“He didn’t help you?” Sherrie raises an eyebrow in disbelief.

“He tried.” Bradley scratches the back of his head, remembering how frustrated the patient man had been after his third attempt at explaining. “I just really don’t understand circuit loops. And he thought having a classmate explain it to me would make it stick. That or he was just so sick of me, he’s pawning me off.”

He watches her think, her pencil rapidly tapping against her notebook, making him nervous.

“I don’t want to be rude, but if you don’t understand current loops, I’m not sure how much help I can be. I understand the material, but I’m not a miracle worker.”

Her bluntness makes him smile. “I’m not expecting miracles, just help with the homework. If you have time.”

“Okay, just as long as you don’t get your hopes up too much.” She grabs a bright pink notebook and opens it up. “So, I’m usually free-”

“I don't want to interrupt, but I do have to get to class, so could we figure out a time later today?”

“Sure, I’ll be here until my class at four. Feel free to sit down if I’m not here; it just means I’m grabbing food.” He nods, backing away. “Wait! Bradley! Go down this hall and out the side door. You’ll be like halfway there already.”

“Awesome, thanks!” He starts to jog down the hallway, looking back to see her putting her headphones back in. Waving back when she smiles and wiggles her fingers at him before going back to her homework.

Friday, July 15, 2016 | 3:16 PM EST | Charlotte, NC

“Our flight got delayed, and I’m hungry.”

Sherrie jumps, not expecting Bradley to get that close to her face three seconds after she exited the bathroom.

“Okay, I could eat. Where do you wan-”

“Auntie Anne’s.”

He’s walking away before she can even process what he said. She allows herself one second to appreciate the way he looks, walking through the concourse - navy slacks fitting his legs perfectly and all their bags thrown over his broad shoulders - before she’s clicking along after him.

“Bradshaw!” He freezes and turns, almost taking a lanky teenager out with her backpack. “Oh my god, Bradley! Be careful! You almost took that kid’s head off.”

His smile is sheepish as she shuffles them over to the wall. “I did not do that on purpose.”

She giggles and takes her backpack from his shoulder. “Yeah, I kinda figured. But you should have seen his face. His life flashed before his eyes. All sixteen years.”

“I can carry that Sherrie.”

“That’s okay, I got it. No! Bradley!”

He ignores her, smiling at her frustrated little stomp when he hands over her tan, cross-body purse out of her work bag. “You just carry that and make sure I don’t take out any toddlers or old ladies.”

“How am I supposed to do that if I’m ahead of you?” She snarks as he steers them toward the food stands.

“You’re smart; I’m sure you’ll figure it out.” Bradley laughs when she mocks him under her breath. “I can hear you, smartass.”

“You were meant to, Bradley.”

His heart flutters at the teasing wink she sends over her shoulder. It’s been twelve years since they became friends, and he still feels like that 20-year-old kid who was nervous to talk to the pretty red-headed girl he had a crush on.

He can feel eyes on them as her heels catch people’s attention, and he finds himself glaring at men who are shamelessly staring. Her shoes aren’t loud as they click along on the tile floor, but it’s hard to ignore the beautiful woman striding along in business casual.

It happens everywhere they go.

Sherrie has always been beautiful and painfully unaware of her effect on men. It never matters where they are - at work, the rare baseball game he forces her to attend, happy hour with their friends from school - she always catches attention. It doesn’t bother him because she never reciprocates, and he’s always the one to give her a ride back to her apartment.

Even if he wishes it was their apartment they were going to.

He’s watched her change over the last decade, seen her grow as a person. He’s risen through the ranks with her professionally, the two of them matching each other step for step with each promotion and raise. He’s publicly assured her that her hair still looks good as it’s deepened color with age, now less red and more auburn. He’s privately appreciated the way her body has changed, softer and curvier than when they were kids. Her wide hips are a frequent star in his daydreams.

It's the only place where they’ll ever be in a relationship.

He knows they’d be perfect together. Old friends who know each other so well they don’t even have to talk to communicate sometimes. Whose attitudes fit together like puzzle pieces, perfectly in sync with each other. He knows it won’t happen. Can’t happen.

“Grab us a table, and I’ll get the food.”

“Okay.” He doesn’t fight her about paying, knowing this will be covered under their per diem. “Don’t forget my-”

“You’re frozen lemonade, I know!”

Bradley rolls his eyes at the hand that waves over her shoulder, settling their bags at a table and keeping an eye on Sherrie while sending an update to Mav.

His thumbs hover over the keyboard. He wants to tell his uncle the whole situation - that he’s not afraid to flirt with Sherrie.

“Everything okay?”

Bradley looks up to find her eyebrows furrowed as she sets a tray down.

“All good. Just sending my family an update that we’re delayed.”

She nods, sitting in the chair across from him. “Here’s your mini pretzel dogs, with mustard and a frozen lemonade. This is my pretzel nuggets, cheese sauce, and Diet Coke. Oh! And I got us these cinnamon sugar pretzels to share!”

“Thank you for remembering the mustard.”

“Bradley, when have I ever forgotten the mustard? Here, take some napkins.”

He shoves an entire mini pretzel dog in his mouth in lieu of answering her question, which they both know the answer to. Never. She has never forgotten his love for pretzels with mustard.

They eat in comfortable silence, the way only two friends can, occasionally dunking into each other's sauces as they scroll through their phones.

“Hey, how is your da- oh Bradley! You got mustard on your shirt!” His head snaps down to his shirt, groaning when he sees the yellow blob on his white button-up.

“Fuck! This is new, too!”

Sherrie dives into her bag, muttering about a stain stick, a triumphant noise escaping when she comes up successful. Scooting closer to him, she’s hit with a wave of nostalgia as she helps him clean his shirt.

Friday, April 6, 2007 | 10:12 PM EST | Charlottesville, VA

“You should’ve been gone, knowing how I made you feel!”

Sherrie’s head pops up from the lab reports she’s grading.

“And I should've been gone, after all your words of steel!”

She knows that voice.

“Oh, I must've been a dreamer! And I must've been someone else!”

She knows that voice very well.

“And we should've been over!”

She rushes for the front door, hoping and praying that the idiot she’s become close friends with this year isn’t actually outside her townhouse.

“Oh! Sherrie, our love holds on! Holds on!”

She whips the door open and, sure enough, drunkenly singing to her neighbor's house is Bradley Bradshaw.

“Bradley!” She hisses at him, ignoring the flutters in her stomach when he points his big, goofy grin towards her and not the tulips the soccer girls next door planted in front of their bay window. “What are you doing? It’s 10 PM!”

“You didn’t come.”

“First man to ever care about that.” She mutters, snorting at her joke.

“What’s funny?”

“Nothing. What are you doing here?”

His puppy dog eyes are vicious, and she has the urge to slap her hand over her eyes so she doesn’t succumb to their power. “You didn’t come to the party!”

Sherrie sighs, she thought he might be disappointed she didn’t come to the annual Sigma Chi Easter Bash, but she never thought he would actually notice her absence. Or that it would result in a drunken serenade.

“Bradley, I told you I had a lot of grading and might not make it tonight.” She gently reminds him, stifling a laugh when he trips over his own feet while standing still. “You okay?”

“I have to pee. Can I come in?”

She’s pretty sure he’s just making excuses but lets him in any way; she doesn’t need to deal with him getting a public indecency charge on top of everything else. “Shoes off, Bradshaw. Bathroom is right here; I’ll be in the dining room.”

“Yes, ma’am!” He sloppily salutes her, losing his balance and thunking against the wall, one shoe still on.

Sherrie just blinks at him before returning to her spot at the dining room table, holding in the laugh threatening to escape. She settles in her chair, focusing on the mediocre reports her students had turned in.

“I washed my hands!” Bradley’s abrupt entrance startles her. “Can we have a snack? I’m hungry?

She watches in amusement as he shuffles to her fridge, riffling through the shelves before opening the freezer and gasping.

“I love pretzels. Can we make these? Please?”

The box of pretzels belongs to her roommate, but she’s not strong enough to deny Bradley’s big brown eyes two times in a row so she makes a mental note to buy Amna a new box the next time she goes to the store. “Yeah, we can. But no touching the oven when you’re drunk. Go sit down.”

“I’m not drunk!” He argues even as he follows her directions, plopping himself at the table and nosily leafing through her done pile. “Wow, lots of red here.”

“Bradley! Don’t look at those!”

“Why not?”

“Would you want some random student looking through your homework?”

His rebuttal gets cut off by the oven beeping, announcing it’s up to temp. After she pops the tray in the oven, she turns and catches him appreciating the pj shorts riding up her shapely legs.

“What?” Her head cocks in confusion.

“Nothin'… cute shorts.”

“Thank you.” He watches in fascination as she snips at him even while her cheeks turn pink. “It’s almost like I was dressed for comfort and not planning on being interrupted.”

“But you’re glad I’m here, right?”

“I’ve had worse company on a Friday night.” She nudges him out of her chair. “While those are baking, go find something to watch, and I’m going to finish grading this report.”

“Such a responsible TA.”

Pride fills his chest as Sherrie snorts at his joke and goes back to work. They’ve officially been friends since last year, but he still tries his hardest to make her laugh. She's always so busy and stressed, and she does the cutest little snort-laugh when he catches her off guard.

He puts on a random movie, just grabbing a VHS case with the Disney logo on the side, before plopping on the couch. “Is there a reason you have so many kids movies?”

“Those are Jayla’s, she collects them.” Sherrie answers, never looking up from the table. “What did you choose?”

“It’s a surprise!”

“You don’t remember, huh?”

“Nope! I’ll be quiet now.”

She hums a thank you in his direction, and Bradley keeps his promise, watching her work and staying quiet until the timer goes off. His chin hooked on the back of the couch; he follows her movement through the kitchen as she pulls the pretzels out and transfers them to a plate.

“Can I have mustard, please?”

“Sure can.” Sherrie smiles at his dopey smile as she makes her way to the couch. “Here, take these, then we can eat.”

He gulps down the painkillers she drops in his hand, chugging the rest of the apple juice after they’re gone, smiling when she absentmindedly praises him for listening. He shoves a bite of pretzel in his mouth and mashes the play button, and is pleasantly surprised to find A Bug’s Life was the mystery choice.

“I love this movie,” he garbles through a pretzel. “I love how Flick wins over the princess just by getting a chance to show off his true self.”

“That was shockingly wise for the drunk man sprawled on my couch.”

Bradley thanks her, already a bit more sober but not enough to pick up on her teasing. “So, why didn’t you come? Grading really couldn’t wait?”

“It probably could have, but I’m not a partier, Bradley. You know that.” She dips a piece of pretzel in the mustard. “Besides, I really didn’t think you would notice I wasn’t there, Mr. Popular.”

“You’re the only person I invited; of course, I noticed when you didn’t show up.”

“Really? No one else? Why?”

“I know it’s almost finals, but I wanted to hang out without any books in front of us; that’s all we do lately. Study. Plus, you’ve been extra stressed about something that you don’t want to talk about, and I just wanted you to relax since you won’t talk to me about whatever is bothering you.”

“That’s sweet of you, Bradley. It’s not that I don’t want to tell you; it’s just that my family has been…” She waves a hand through the air, a deep sigh escaping. “It’s complicated. I’m trying not to think about it too much.”

“Well, I’m here if you do want to talk.”

“Thanks bud. How about you? How’re your parents?” She takes one last chunk before nudging the plate in his direction and settling back into the corner.

“Mom is good; she’s close to being considered cancer-free. I think we’re gonna throw a party when she gets there.”

“That’s awesome, Bradley! I’m glad she’s doing so well. How’s your dad?”

“Mav isn’t my dad.”

A record scratch plays in Sherrie’s head as she freezes. She knows she’s heard Bradley talk about his dad, and she’d seen photos of his parents the one time she had visited his frat house last year. He had specifically pointed the photo out, telling her it was his parents. She had even been next to him when he was on the phone when he said “dad” to the person on the other end.

“My dad died when I was three. Mav is- was his best friend. I call him dad sometimes because he’s the closest thing I’ve got.”

Sherrie feels her heart break as Bradley sniffles and sadly shoves a mustard-covered pretzel in his mouth, unshed tears clumping his eyelashes. She’s never seen her friend like this before; she’s experienced many other emotions - frustration, joy, confusion - but the pain creasing his brow is new.

Comforting crying people has never been her forte, but instinctively - almost like they moved without her permission - Sherrie’s fingers run over his hair. Gently stroking the sun-streaked waves as a few tears escape down his cheeks and she scoots closer, letting her body press into his side and hoping the proximity helps.

“I’m sorry for crying on you.” He quietly apologizes after a few minutes of tears.

“S’okay. Family can be hard sometimes.”

“Complicated.”

“That too.” She hums, not moving as he swipes at his eyes and leans against her more, his head resting on her shoulder in a slouched position that can’t be comfortable.

“I love Mav; he’s my dad in all the ways it matters. It just sucks that my actual dad won’t be here for graduation. Like, I know he’s missed so much of my life already, but something about him missing college graduation is worse than everything else. It’s just so unfair; I barely remember him, but I just- I just miss him so much, Sherrie.”

Her heart cracks in half at the whispered confession. She can’t even imagine the pain of losing a parent at such a young age. The inability to remember one of the people responsible for giving you life, all memories fuzzy and most built from second-hand recollections of those who can remember. So she says the one thing she would want to hear.

“Tell me about him.”

Sherrie knows she said the right thing when his red-rimmed eyes brighten, and he immediately launches into a beloved story detailing his father’s love of pranks. She listens dutifully — laughing at the right moments and asking questions when Bradley gets carried away, forgetting that she doesn’t know all the people in his story — and feels her heart warm more and more. She’s always liked Bradley, probably more than she should, but it’s hard not to like him. He’s considerate, smart, and funny, not to mention handsome.

Thankfully, before she gets lost in thoughts of broad shoulders and strong jawlines, a big glob of mustard drops on Bradley’s t-shirt, abruptly cutting him off. The two stare in silence at the yellow condiment sitting on the black cotton shirt, somehow surprised at its appearance, before breaking down into giggles.

“C’mon Bradshaw,” Sherrie grabs his hand, pulling him off the couch. “I have a Tide pen we can use on that mess.”

Bradley follows her up the stairs and into the bathroom, teasing Sherrie about the way her tongue pokes out when she focuses. She takes the gentle taunts, grateful he’s focusing on that and not on her pink cheeks or the way her eyes keep darting to his toned stomach. She’s not sure it was completely necessary for him to strip his shirt off, but she won’t be complaining.

“Well,” A few minutes later, she interrupts his rambling story about a slip and slide. Or she thinks that’s what it’s about; she missed the first part. “I think this is as good as I can get it.”

“That’s okay; it’s not like it’s new or anything. Thanks, Sherrie.”

She steadfastly ignores the pounding heart in her chest as miles of golden skin gets covered back up, trying to not feel too disappointed by its disappearance.

Friday, July 15, 2016 | 3:56 PM EST | Charlotte, NC

“Oh, this is ridiculous!” Bradley complains a bit too loudly, ears going hot when several pairs of eyes curiously dart toward him, but his focus doesn’t stay on that for very long when he catches the face Sherrie makes. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing!”

He squints suspiciously as she avoids eye contact. He usually takes her at her word and doesn’t push, but the frown pulling down the corners of her pink lips sets off bells in his head. “Sherrie, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing, Bradley. I’m fine.”

He grumbles at her lack of response but settles again in the spot they had claimed after finishing their snack. The gate was still packed, but they had found a prime location with outlets; the only downside was having to sit on the floor, something that is getting harder the older they get.

Bradley scans the area, trying to scout out some open chairs for them to grab, while Sherrie goes back to the movie they’ve been watching on his phone. His eyes drop away from the chairs in surprise when she scoots closer and leans on his shoulder. It’s not uncommon for them to sit close like this at home in Boston, sides pressed together, but she makes a point to be professional when they’re on travel.

“Hey,” he gently nudges her side, concern rising when she doesn’t lift her head, choosing to tilt her neck back, looking up at him with tired eyes. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

Panic grips his chest when tears start forming, clouding her green eyes. “Sherrie?! What’s wrong?”

“We were supposed to be halfway home by now, and I’m so uncomfortable. I’m sorry, Bradley, I’m just so tired.” She whimpers, hiding against his bicep.

It hits him like a glass of cold water. Of course, she’s uncomfortable. She’s been walking around in heels and her pantsuit since 4AM California time after getting maybe three hours of sleep. His suit and shoes are comfortable and easily wearable for twelve-plus hours, not to mention the jacket and tie that were ditched sometime after the mustard incident.

“Oh, Sherrie, it’s okay. Let’s go change, yeah? Then we’ll find a quieter place so you can close your eyes and maybe get some sleep.”

“But the policy…”

Bradley resists the urge to roll his eyes at her insistence on rule-following. “In the nicest way possible, Sher, fuck the policy. You’re uncomfortable, and I care about that way more than I could ever care about a stupid, archaic policy.”

He stands, unplugging their phones and gathering their bags on his shoulder before turning to his best friend, who is still on the floor. “C’mon, we’re putting comfy clothes on.”

“But Bradley-”

“No arguing.” He interrupts, helping her off the ground and directing them back towards the restrooms. “We’re not going to sit in our suits for god knows how much longer.”

“But Bradley, I don’t have anything to change into. We had such a packed schedule I didn’t bother to bring normal clothes.” He ignores the thumping of his heart when her hand grabs his forearm, warm fingers slipping under the edge of the rolled-up sleeve as she tugs to slow his pace. At that information, he slides them out of the flow of traffic and over to the wall, Bradley pressing her against one of the columns lining the concourse atrium.

“You don’t have any regular clothes? What about your pajamas?”

“I have a pair of leggings because I was going to do a training run in the gym last night, but that’s it. I can’t wear my pjs because… well, they’re not appropriate for public.”

“Your leggings are clean, though, right?” He asks, ignoring the thoughts of what non-public appropriate pajamas might look like.

“Well, yeah, dinner went so late I barely had time to sleep before we had to be up. I guess I could buy a shirt at one of the SmartShop- what are you doing?”

Bradley peers up from his knees, where he had started digging in his bag. “I’m grabbing one of my shirts for you. Would you prefer a t-shirt or a sweatshirt? Actually, you’re definitely gonna get cold, sweatshirt for you.”

He pulls the worn, gray crew neck out, shaking it out before handing it over.

“You still have this?” The disbelief in her voice makes him laugh.

“Of course, I still have that! Relay was always my favorite event of the year. And that year was my favorite one.”

As the philanthropy chair of Sigma Chi, part of his job was to sign the brothers up for volunteer events and fundraisers. With his mom’s diagnosis, he ensured their schedule included the campus’ annual Relay for Life event, pouring as many resources as he could into the fundraiser that directly helped advance cancer research.

“Wait, but why was junior year your favorite?” She asks, brushing her fingers over the cracked, screen-printed logo.

“Because that’s the reason we became friends, Sher.”

Surprised green eyes meet sincere brown eyes, a thousand words said in the silence of their stares, both remembering the lead-up to that day in April so many years ago.

Bradley’s eyes widen in panic as everyone at the gate starts moving as a herd. They had finally found seats to relax in after changing, the group of passengers waiting with them shrinking as time went on. And now, with only ten minutes until boarding, their gate has changed again.

“Sherrie, wake up!” He feels bad shaking the snoozing woman off, but they have to move with the group to make it to the new part of Terminal A in time for their flight. “C’mon, honey, they changed the gate again — we gotta go!”

“What are you- again?! Shit!” She wipes the bleariness from her eyes, slinging her bags over her shoulder and grabbing the hand he holds out.

The two coworkers, along with fifty of their fellow passengers who have stuck this out, speed walk down the first branch of the terminal. The entire group picking up the pace when turning the corner towards the second branch where the new gate lives. By the time they hit the second branch, everyone is practically running — time ticking down to boarding — no one wanting to miss this flight.

As if the blob of Flight 1121 passengers racing toward the end of the terminal didn’t garner attention from other gates, the entire terminal is staring by the time they reach gate A28, and several people start yelling in frustration.

“This is unbelievable!” An older gentleman’s unhappiness is interrupted by three simultaneous updates pinging everyone’s phones.

Bradley’s head drops back in disbelief, wrapping his arm around Sherrie when her head thunks against his chest. He doesn’t even get a chance to comfort her before the gate agents are making announcements about getting people on other flights, providing hotel rooms, and the vouchers that will be shared.

“Again, we apologize, but if you have flexible travel plans, we ask that you please go to the end of the line so those with time constraints can be taken care of first. Thank you for your cooperation, folks!”

“Well, that’s us, huh?”

“Yeah, I guess.” Sherrie blows air out of her lips, a mischievous smile taking over her face. “Hey, at least this means extra per diem money.”

Bradley laughs as they move to the back of the squiggly line that’s forming, letting her take the bags so he can step away to call to update their supervisor and then his pet sitter. It only takes a few rings for his boss to pick up. “Bradshaw! What’s up? You okay?”

“Hey Martin, all good. Just wanted to let you know that our flight has gotten supremely delayed. We won’t be home until tomorrow morning sometime.”

“Jesus, do you guys need anything?”

“Nah, we’re good. The airline is putting us up in a hotel for the night and giving vouchers for a bunch of stuff. Just called to let you know and for a heads up on the expense report.”

“Well, that is the most important part!” Martin’s honking laugh makes Bradley chuckle as he glances to check on Sherrie’s progress in line. “How’s Sherrie? She good?”

“Yeah, she’s good. She’s holding our spot in line for getting new tickets and stuff.” And it looks like she’s made friends already, he silently adds, smiling at her interacting with the elderly couple in front of her.

“Good. Alright then, I’ll see you on Monday, but let me know if you guys need anything. And hey! If you two end up in the same hotel room — remember what I said on your first day!”

The line goes dead, and so does Bradley’s smile, his stomach churning like it does every time he remembers his first day at the Wells Corporation.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007 | 11:15 AM EST | Boston, MA

“Will you calm down?”

“I can’t, Bradley. What if no one likes me? What if I fuck up?!” She hisses, working to appear calm as they wait for their supervisor to show up, but failing.

“First of all, we’re starting together, so you have at least one person that likes you. And you’re great, everyone will like you. Second, there will be mistakes, but we just graduated — they’re not going to let us do anything alone because we don’t know anything yet.”

Sherrie nods, tucking her hands under her legs and trying to breathe. Bradley’s words are encouraging, but he doesn’t know how difficult her internship was last summer. The older engineers she shadowed treated her like a glorified coffee girl and secretary. Even when she had pointed out a mistake they all had missed, there was no change — just the addition of making her type their reports to see if she could catch something the non-engineer tech writers would miss.

This is a brand new company, but misogyny wasn’t unique to Waite Green Construction. Every woman has to work twice as hard to prove her worth and intellect, no matter her age or experience. She’s just hoping her onboarding mentor will be the only other woman in the department; it would be the perfect way to gain a professional mentor once she’s out of the probation period.

“Good morning, kids! How was orientation?” Mr. Teresi walks into the conference room.

Bradley shakes his hand first, “It was good, sir. Nice to see you again.”

“Good to hear! Learn lots of new things.”

“Yes, I think we can be considered experts on trade secrets now.” Sherrie jokes, focusing on making sure her handshake is firm but not too firm.

“Wonderful. So, I’m guessing you two have been introduced, but just in case you haven’t. Bradley, this is Sherrie McHone; she’s an electrical engineer. And Sherrie, this is Bradley Bradshaw, a mechanical engineer.”

“We actually went to school together, sir.”

“We’re friends,” Bradley adds, the two of them exchanging small smiles.

“Oh, great! Well, that makes things easier getting started. Now let’s go over my plan for the two of you, and then we’ll get lunch, my treat for your first day.”

Their supervisor talks for half an hour, going over things they’ll need to be trained in and their first assignments. By the time he’s done, several notebook pages have been filled and highlighted with things that need to be looked up.

“Alright!” The older engineer claps, rubbing his hands together. “I’m sure your brains are overloaded with information, so go drop your things at your desks, and we’ll head to lunch.”

The recent graduates gather their notes and head for the door, quietly talking about a training they’ll be attending next week when he stops them. “One more thing, guys. They never mention it during R&D orientation, but I feel it’s necessary to mention it to new people. Here at Wells, there isn’t a fraternization policy among non-management coworkers or between any employees in different divisions. But we are a fairly small department, so keep in mind who you interact with and what impacts that may have at work.”

Sherrie feels the blood drain from her already pale face as her brand new supervisor stares at her the entire time he speaks, ignoring Bradley completely. She’s going to be sick. Less than four hours into the first professional role of her career, and it’s already happening.

This is the moment it starts, she thinks, her heart pounding in her throat as she robotically nods. It’s never the men that get these warnings. It’s always the women. Always us. Always me.

“I don’t care about that. But there are some people who will, even though they shouldn’t. And I want you guys to have the best experience here you possibly can. You’re both extremely bright, and I’m excited about your futures. I don’t want you to get bogged down by the opinions of others. Understand?”

“Yes, sir.” They answer in unison before filing out of the conference room.

“Sherrie, don’t worry about that. He’s just-”

“Trust me, Bradley. I know exactly what he was saying. I’m going to use the restroom, and then I’ll meet you guys at the elevator.”

“Sherrie…”

But she ignores her friend, shrugging her purse over her shoulder and keeping her face neutral as she heads for the single-stall ladies’ room. Fighting to hold the tears back until she’s inside for fear of being perceived as emotional. A quality no woman can afford to have in a professional setting.

Friday, July 15, 2016 | 8:05 PM EST | Charlotte, NC

“Hey, everything? Martin says hi.”

“We’re good! This is Mr. and Mrs. Ludden; they’re going to visit their newest granddaughter. How’re Sophie and Louis?” Bradley smiles at the excited way she introduces them, putting a steadying hand on her back when she bounces up on her toes.

“Oh, congrats! They’re good; Marie can watch’em one more day, problem.”

“Good, we’ll have to get her a thank you present for the short notice.”

“You didn’t tell us you guys had kids!”

Bradley and Sherrie freeze in place, eyes widening in surprise at the older woman’s words.

“Oh- uh- we-” Sherrie giggles awkwardly. “Sophie and Louis are our cats; we don’t have kids.”

“I’m so sorry!” Mrs. Ludden gasps, hand covering her mouth in shock while her husband groans her name.

“Louise, how many times do we have to do this before you stop making assumptions?”

“It’s okay, innocent mistake,” Bradley assures them.

“Well, they’re such a cute couple. I just thought they would have adorable children, too!”

“Actually… we’re not…”

“Oh, lord. Let me guess. You’re not dating. You’re just friends.”

“Coworkers too, but we were friends first.” Sherrie suppresses a laugh when the older gentleman rubs a hand over his eyes in exasperation.

“Don’t even start, Clayton!”

“I wasn’t going to, dear.”

Bradley can’t help the laugh that escapes at the comfortable ribbing they give each other; it reminds him of his friendship with Sherrie. The easy way they tease, never going too far.

“Would you two like to join us after we get rebooked?” Bradley asks. “We’re going to use our food vouchers tonight to grab dinner before we head to whatever hotel they put us up in.”

The four adults move through the line, chatting about small things and comparing pictures of grandkids and cats. It’s a nice way to spend the time, especially when they get to share judging looks when a woman throws a tantrum and yells at the gate agent. But soon enough, they’re walking back to the main concourse and deciding what food to get.

“No, stop. You just sit here with the bags, and I’ll grab the food.” Bradley gently pushes Sherrie back into her chair, rolling his eyes as he talks over her protests. “I know. You want mac and cheese, Diet Coke, and whatever pulled pork flavor looks best.”

“He’s sweet,” Louise says, watching the two men make their way over to the BBQ place.

“He’s annoying.” Which makes her companion laugh. “Yes, he’s very sweet. I’m lucky to be such good friends with him.”

“Can I ask why the two of you aren’t together? He even knows what food to bring you.”

“It’s just never been like that between us. We’ve always just been friends. And he’s annoyingly smart, so he always remembers what I order.” Sherrie half smiles, pushing down the pain in her chest at the harmless curiosity, watching Bradley laugh at something Clayton says as she remembers the first time he remembered one of her favorites.

Saturday, March 4, 2006 | 1:34 PM EST | Charlottesville, VA

“Thanks for meeting me on a Saturday, Bradshaw. It’s just such a busy semester.”

“No problem. You know you can call me Bradley, right?”

“Oh, sorry. Do you not like being called Bradshaw?” Sherrie blinks when a bottle of Diet Coke and a small bag of Skittles is set on the table in front of her. “What’s this?”

“Your favorite snack.”

“Right… but why?”

“Because you have that about 50% of the time when we meet up to work on this project. Now, I finished transcribing the interview with Commander Buck last night. Did you want to- Sherrie?”

She shifts her focus from the food to the boy across from her in the study nook they’ve claimed as theirs for the semester. “Why do you remember my favorite snack?”

“Because we’re friends?” Brown eyes look into hers, equally confused.

“We’re friends?”

“I hope so; otherwise, this is gonna get awkward when you hug me in a minute.”

“Why am I going to hug you?!”

Bradley laughs at her flabbergasted expression, but it doesn’t hurt her feelings like it does when other people laugh at her. Something about the tone of the laugh makes it feel like he’s laughing at her, but rather with her, and she just doesn’t know the joke yet.

“Because as team captain, I am happy to announce to the Relay Chair that Sigma Chi has officially raised $5,000 thanks to your idea.”

“Bradley, that’s incredible!” She doesn’t feel silly when she bounces around the table to hug his neck, rocking them back and forth in excitement.

“Well, if you think that’s good - let me show you what we’re anticipating to raise this month…”

Friday, July 15, 2016 | 10:12 PM EST | Charlotte, NC

“I just don’t understand how we’re having such bad luck!”

Sherrie rolls her eyes as he unlocks the door. “Bradley, breathe. You’re being very dramatic right now.”

“How is “we’re out of rooms” a legitimate reason for the hotel to give? Not that I mind sharing with you, but like how is that possible? The airline specifically works with them to book rooms for things like this! And the airline! That gate agent who wanted to book us to fly into Hartford and then drive the rest of the way to Boston! That's insane!”

“I don’t know, the Bradley flying into Bradley joke was pretty funny.” She mutters, clicking the lights on as she checks the cleanliness of the room.

“It wasn’t.” Bradley pouts, flopping onto the bed closest to the door. “Do you want to shower first?”

“No, go ahead, but I’m going to wash my face first so I can do a face mask. I’m so dry from the airport air.” He listens to the sounds of water running and the quiet humming as she carefully applies the drenched sheet to her skin. “All yours!”

“Thanks, Sher. I won’t be long.”

He showers quickly but takes extra time cleaning his teeth, his mouth feeling gross after the long travel day. When he comes out, he’s surprised at how cozy the room feels. With only one lamp on, the air conditioning set low to keep the fan running, and an old movie on the TV, it almost feels like they could be at home in his living room. They silently move around each other, Sherrie heading to the bathroom with a pile of things while Bradley organizes his things for the morning, wanting to get as much rest as possible before their early alarm.

He scrolls through emails and texts while he waits for her to shower, turning the television off since he knows there’s a small chance of either of them making it five minutes after they kill the lights. He's updating Mav on tomorrow’s travel plans when Sherrie comes out of the bathroom, her hair wrapped in a towel. Bradley sees her packing things out of the corner of his eye, not fully paying attention until he plugs his phone in.

“That’s what you wear to bed?”

“Bradley!” He laughs at how she jumps, her hands coming down to cover her shorts.

“What? They’re cute! Very pink.”

Her face goes as pink as the pajama set she’s wearing. “Stop making fun of me!”

“I’m not! You know, I love strawberries.” He can’t help the way his eyes roam up and down her body, admiring from the spaghetti straps on her smooth shoulders to the scalloped edge of her shorts. “I see why you didn’t want to change into those at the airport.”

“Oh my god…” She huffs, climbing into her own queen bed and stuffing herself under the sheets. “You set an alarm, right?”

“Yes, ma’am. Want me to turn the light off?”

“Please. God, this day cannot be over soon enough.”

He chuckles and turns the lamp off, listening to her shuffle around in the sheets as she gets comfortable. It’s quiet for a few minutes, and he can hear her breathing leveling out, but he can’t keep quiet; the conversation at the airport running through his mind.

“Sher?” It takes a second, but she quietly hums in response. “We have to talk about it again.”

“No, we don’t.”

“Sherrie-”

“No, Bradley. We talked about this two weeks ago. Nothing has changed since then.”

“Yes, things have changed since then. You interviewed for that principal engineer position. Which if you get-”

“I’m not going to get it. They’re going to pick Trevor.”

“They’re going to pick you. You’re the best person for the job!”

“That’s not how it works, and you know it.”

He’s silent, the crushing weight on his chest feeling heavier when he hears her sniffle.

“Oh, Sherrie…” He slips out of his bed and into hers, wrapping the woman he loves in his arms. He lets her cry, knowing she’s frustrated and exhausted, only speaking up again when she’s calmed down. “I’m sorry, honey.”

“No, I’m sorry, Bradley. It’s not fair that we’ve been dancing around this for so many years, and I keep saying no. You deserve someone who isn’t afraid to be with you. Not a coward like me.”

“You’re not a coward; you’re one of the bravest people I know, Sherrie Anne McHone. I know how critical people are of women, in this field especially. And I love you, so I don’t mind waiting until we’re in a position that you’re confident won’t jeopardize your career. So, we’ll wait to hear about the job, and once you hear that you’ve gotten it, I’m treating you to the nicest dinner in Boston.”

“Bradley, we don’t know-”

“I know we don’t know. But think about how it would be if it does. Wouldn’t that be amazing?”

“But what about-”

“Doesn’t matter, honey.”

“You don’t even know what I was gonna say.” Sherrie mumbles, cuddling further into his side, making it clear that he wasn’t allowed to leave.

“I know, but it doesn’t matter, whatever it is — we’ll figure it out.”

Saturday, July 16, 2016 | 10:32 AM EST | Somewhere over Virginia

“She’ll take a ginger ale; thank you so much.” Bradley balances his apple juice, the two packets of Biscoff cookies, and the bubbling soda he got for Sherrie. The smiling flight attendant moves past their row as he turns to his row companion.

They’re finally on their way home after waking up to more delay announcements. The additional time meant there was time to get coffee and some fruit from the hotel before their taxi back to the airport arrived, and the Luddens had even stopped to chat for a second at the gate, excited that they had gotten bumped up to first class since the flight was nearly empty.

All things considered, it had been a good morning even though Sherrie was insisting on working during the flight. Bradley is sure it’s an attempt to ignore their talk from last night, not wanting to dwell on the emotional moment when things are still so up in the air.

He looks over at the woman he’s known since he was eighteen, overwhelmed for a moment by how little things have changed since the first time he ever noticed her. Bradley fondly watches as she furiously types, hunched over her laptop with headphones, playing what he knows is eighties hair bands.

Her nose wrinkles in frustration, and suddenly it’s 2003 again, and he’s trying to get the attention of the red-haired girl whose table has the only empty chair left, something he desperately needs since this book can’t leave the library. He’s unable to get her attention and resorts to knocking on the table, heart skipping a beat when the prettiest green eyes he’s ever seen blink up at him. Bradley gestures at the empty chair, silently asking if he can sit, and is grateful when she nods because her smile is making his knees wobble. For the next hour, he tries to take notes for his paper, but he keeps getting distracted by the beautiful girl across from him. Bradley isn’t sure if he’s upset or happy when she packs up her stuff and leaves, giving him a little wave when she notices him watching her.

That had been thirteen years ago, and her intense focus still distracts him, but he’s not afraid to interrupt her this time. Fingers rub her arm that is covered in his sweatshirt again, but this time, he knows it smells like her shampoo instead of his cologne. Her smile still sends his heart skipping when she looks up at him, her pretty eyes widening in joy when she catches sight of the red snack packaging and the plastic cup holding her second favorite soda.

“Thank you!” She whispers, leaning across the empty middle seat in their row to kiss his cheek. “Oh, and we should go out to lunch when we get back! I want to try that new noodle place that opened in Southie.”

He just smiles when she immediately gets back to work; cheek puffed out from the cookie she stuffed in her mouth.

Maybe she’s not avoiding our talk from last night.

Thursday, August 11, 2017 | 2:15 PM EST | Boston, MA

“You got a minute?” Bradley knocks on the edge of her cubicle. It may be a different floor of their building, but all of the office space is the same dated stuff from decades ago.

“Yeah, what’s up?”

“First of all…” He ducks down and presses a swift kiss to her plush mouth, still trying to make up for all those years he couldn’t. “And don’t say anything because I already checked before I did because I wanted to kiss my girl.”

He chuckles at the pink spots that shine on her cheeks. It’s been a year since Sherrie snagged the promotion, and they officially became an item, but she still turns a little red whenever he says something sweet.

“Second, you are all packed, right?”

“Yes, why?”

“I was gonna swing by the apartment and get our bags so we can head straight to the airport after work.”

“You took the afternoon off? Why?”

Bradley was expecting this question and smoothly fibs. “I worked the hours out with Martin for this week so I could run a few last-minute errands. Do you want me to grab snacks?”

“Okay, Mr. Secrets. When you’re at home, could you water the ivy? I forgot this morning, and I don’t want it to die while we’re gone.”

“Of course! Need me to do anything else?”

Sherrie hums, staring at the ceiling as she thinks. “One more kiss?”

“Yes, ma’am.” Bradley happily complies with her request.

“Okay, now you have to go. I have to finish prepping for this meeting where I get to yell at Sean.”

“That’s my girl. I’ll pick you up later. I love you.”

“I love you, too. Have fun with your mysterious errands.” Sherrie teases, and Bradley smirks back, knowing how much she would be freaking out if he knew what he would be doing while she professionally reamed out their least favorite colleague.

“Thanks, honey. Text me if you think of something.” Sherrie waves over her shoulder, already zoned back into her work.

Bradley doesn’t dare look at his buzzing phone until he’s safely on the elevator, pleased to see confirmation texts from their hotel and the airline. Would it be cheesy to quietly propose in the airport that was a catalyst in their relationship? Maybe, but he knew Sherrie would love it. He’s just hoping the TSA didn’t call out the ring that would be hiding in his carry-on.

#deltasupremacy I also want to give a special thanks to @sometimesanalice, who gave so much encouragement through the texts despite having no idea what I was writing - you're the best! tagged some friends and most those who interacted with the original announcement post for this fic all those months ago!

tagging: @gretagerwigsmuse @sometimesanalice @laracrofted @theharddeck @hangmanbrainrot @hangmanssunnies @thesewordsareallihavetogive @princessphilly @katieshook02 @atarmychick007 @kmc1989 @a-court-of-roscoe-and-baby @misfitpeach @luckyladycreator2 @scarlettwidow19 @mini-bee-bee @midnightstarqueen @shamelessghostwagonwobbler

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[camaro-and-smokes]

Get Out of My Dreams, Get into My Car

Chapter 9: Can't fight this feeling

Moodboard by the amazing @a-redharlequin 💜

No warnings for this chapter. Tags: Feelings realization (the other way around I guess)

Summary: Steve had been struggling the whole night with the words he should've said in the evening and in the morning he finally decides just to go for it. Unfortunately the universe seems to have everything against him on that day.

Read on AO3 >>

:::::::::::

Steve had kicked himself mentally through the entire night for not saying the words in the evening. Three small words that would’ve probably changed everything and he couldn’t get them out of his mouth.

And now that they were sitting at the breakfast table, it felt just stupid if he’d say them here in the middle of coffee and eggs. Pass me the sugar and I like you please don’t go to your ex’s art thing.

“So, you’re going to the opening, then?” he ventured as he stirred his coffee absentmindedly.

Billy nodded, keeping his eyes on the newspaper.

“Uh, about that…” Steve started his brave try, despite the awkwardness.

Billy looked up from the newspaper.

“At what time is it?” Steve asked.

“Six.”

“Right.” Just say it, you idiot, Steve scolded himself. “I was thinking, um…”

Suddenly there was a loud knock on the terrace door and both of them turned to look at who was pounding it at this hour.

“Hey, Malibu!” Argyle shouted through the door. “Weren’t we supposed to catch some waves this morning?”

“Oh, yeah, just a moment!” Billy shouted back and looked at Steve. “We agreed with Argyle that we’d go…” Billy started and motioned to the living room.

Steve wanted to strangle Argyle. “Yeah, you go ahead,” he said with a wave of his hand, managing to keep his tone light—but just barely.

Billy looked at him for a moment. “You sure?”

Steve nodded. “U-huh. It can wait.”

“Alright,” Billy said, nodding. He shouted to Argyle, “I’ll be there in five!” and left to get his gear.

Steve leaned back in his chair and stared at the ceiling. He tried to assure himself that he could still talk about it with Billy when he came back from the beach. There was time.

So, to spend the time doing something productive, he finished his breakfast, read the newspaper from cover to cover—hardly remembering any of it, though—and washed the dishes.

He was drying the last plates when the phone rang. He dried his hands on the towel and unhooked the receiver. “Harrington.”

“Morning, Steve,” came a familiar female voice through the wire.

Steve leaned his head against the wall, groaning inwardly. “Hi, mom.”

“We just arrived in San Diego yesterday and I thought—”

“You’re here?” Steve interrupted her, confused. “Why didn’t you call earlier?”

“Well, your father wanted to spend a few days longer in Vegas than we planned and then we kind of forgot.”

Steve sighed. “You were coming this way and didn’t let me know?”

“Well, we thought we’d surprise you,” his mother said with the tone that told Steve that he shouldn’t be offended when his parents decided to grace him with their existence out of the blue.

Steve ran his hand over his face. He already knew where this was going and…he didn’t exactly have anything special to do except that talk with Billy and keep him from going to the gallery opening. He let out a deep sigh. “Okay. What did you have in mind?”

Mrs. Harrington wasn’t amused. “Don’t sound so eager about it, Steve.”

He set the receiver on his shoulder to a bit to squeeze his eyes closed. “Sorry. I just have…things to figure out.”

“Well, can you take a break from thinking and come for a brunch with your parents? Maybe you could recommend a restaurant and we could meet there?”

+ + +

When Billy came back from the beach, to his disappointment, Steve was gone. While in the zone on his board, he’d decided that they’d need to talk about last night—and maybe ask if Steve would want to join him at the opening. To keep Rob from getting any stupid ideas and…just to go out with Steve. Totally not for a date, but just…out.

But now he had no option but to wait for Steve to come back. So, he took a shower and then sat on the couch to watch TV.

Just as he was starting to relax, when the phone ringing in the kitchen shattered the quiet and jolted him back to reality.

Alice, the owner of the aerobic studio, was on the other end, her voice sounding like it came from the bottom of a barrel. “Hi, Billy! I’m sorry this comes on a such a short notice, but would you be able to do my aerobic classes today? I got some nasty bug, and I won’t be leaving the house today.”

Billy wasn’t entirely thrilled about the idea. “Uh, depends on what time,” Billy replied, rubbing his neck with his hand. He knew how much the studio meant to Alice, but he wouldn’t want to be the first she’d call next time…

“They’re from three to five. Please, Billy, everyone else has said no, and I don’t want to cancel.”

Billy looked at the clock on the opposite wall. It was already 2:20 pm, so in order to make it on time, he would have to leave now. “Well, you could’ve called a bit earlier, but sure, I can do that.”

“You are an angel! I’ll make this up to you! Just make sure to be on time,” she teased him, reminding him of the many times he’d been late for his own classes.

Billy laughed. “Don’t worry, I’ll leave right now.”

After hanging up, Billy went to put his aerobics gear together. While at it, he realized that there wouldn’t be time for him to come back home from the studio. He’d have to go to the gallery straight from there.

What a perfect reason to cancel going to the whole thing.

But if he did that, said that he was sick and couldn’t go, even if Rob wouldn’t know he lied, he himself would. And part in becoming himself was to be honest with himself and to everyone else…

Fuck.

He didn’t have to stay there more than just show up, have a flute of sparkling and come back home. He’d live through it.

Now all he needed to do was to go through his wardrobe quickly to find something to wear in the evening and change into at the studio.

+ + +

The brunch with his parents had lasted longer than Steve had expected. It had been nice to see them because he hadn’t seen them after he’d moved away from Hawkins. And since he knew he had time to talk with Billy before six pm, he hadn’t rushed back.

So, when he finally got back home, it was a surprise to find the house empty.

“Billy?” he called out.

No response.

He checked the living room, kitchen and even poked his head into Billy’s bedroom, but there was no sign of him. Not even a note on the kitchen table.

He looked at the aerobics class list on the fridge door, held up by a magnetic surfboard, and immediately he heard Billy’s voice in his head correcting him: It’s a longboard! There’s a difference! It made him smile—apparently he’d finally learned the lesson.

He concentrated on looking at the timetable: Billy’s classes were on Tuesday and Wednesday, and he was fairly certain Billy wouldn’t go for an extra lesson today. Or any day, really. He did his exercise on the waves and by lifting and aerobics was on his own exercise schedule only in the winter.

Steve’s shoulders slumped as he walked back to the living room and plopped down on the couch. He had no idea where Billy could be. The only option he really had was to wait and then go to the gallery and try to catch him at the opening before Rob would do any more damage.

At least he knew where the opening was because it was written on the calendar on the wall; The Brush Poets’ Gallery.

+ + +

Billy walked through the bustling art gallery, his stomach churning with a cocktail of nerves and morbid curiosity. It had been months since he’d last seen Rob, and the prospects of their reunion filled him with equal parts dread and anticipation.

Just breathe. You’ve got this. It’s not like you’re still hung up on the guy, right? He tried to reassure himself, but his sweaty palms and racing heart told a different story.

As he navigated the throng of well-dressed somebodies, Billy caught sight of one of Rob’s paintings hanging on the wall. Rob had painted it during one of their steamy nights, and it made Billy’s chest ache with a bittersweet pang of nostalgia.

Don’t go down that road again , he chided himself firmly. Rob’s ancient history. You’re here just for …Though he wasn’t really sure why he was there. He knew he should’ve left Rob behind, for good, ages ago, but hearing his voice on the phone had breathed life into the embers of the love Billy once had felt.

Fucking feelings. Nothing but trouble.

He found his way to the other end of the space and…there stood Rob next to a podium, looking infuriatingly handsome in a tailored suit that hugged his lean frame in all the right places.

Billy snorted and pondered for a moment who Rob had coaxed into giving him the money for it, since sure as hell wouldn’t have money for having tailored anything himself.

Probably someone from this crowd. Though Billy was sure most of them were here just to show themselves and get tipsy before heading out to the blinding lights of the city.

As if on cue, Rob turned to look in Billy’s direction, and the way his eyes lit up when their gazes met made butterflies take flight in Billy’s stomach.

Though Billy wasn’t sure if it was a flutter of cute small butterflies or just a few big, ugly moths reminding him of the pain Rob had caused.

+ + +

The dusk had started to settle when Steve parked his car around the corner from the gallery. He gripped the steering wheel for a while after turning off the engine. He wasn’t entirely sure if this still was a good idea. But he also knew it needed to be done. He needed it done.

So, he got out of the car and walked back to the gallery, hands shoved in the pockets of his jacket. When he got there, he stopped to look inside through the windows. Surprisingly sizable crowd of people seemed to be inside. He recognized some faces—sure as hell, everyone who’s anyone, and so on. He tried to look for Billy, but there were too many people for him to tell.

Doubt crept in as he gazed inside. He wasn’t sure if he should be here. If it would make any difference. But going in was his only possibility to tell Billy how he felt before Rob did something that would ruin his chances.

The vibrant atmosphere of the gallery enveloped him as he stepped through the doors. The bright track lights illuminated the colorful abstract paintings that lined the white walls, and soft instrumental music mingled with the lively chatter of the crowd holding wine glasses.

But there was only one thing Steve’s eyes were on the lookout for; the long blond curls.

“A glass of Chardonnay, sir?” a waiter materialized at Steve’s elbow.

Steve jumped at the sudden words coming from right next to him. “Oh, um, no thank you,” Steve stammered.

Get it together, Harrington.

To calm himself, he took a deep breath, inhaling the scent of expensive perfume that lingered all over. He meandered along the perimeter, taking in the colorful, emotive artworks while surreptitiously keeping an eye out for Billy in the crowd.

With each passing moment, his nerves raised closer to the surface. What would he even say if he bumped into Billy? Hey buddy, fancy seeing you here! Looking damn fine in that…whatever he would be wearing.

Steve shook his head. Great, only cheesy pickup lines in store.

As Steve found his way further into the space, he finally stopped. There, on the side of a small podium, was Billy.

Steve smiled. Billy had his hair up in a messy bun and strands were hanging loose, framing his face. He was wearing a simple white silk shirt that hung on his broad shoulders and—if it was any consolation to Steve—his normal blue jeans and not the tighter than tight black jeans he usually wore when he went out. Not that the blue ones were any less tight, mind you.

+ + +

Just before Billy reached Rob, the artist stepped up to the small podium and raised his hand to silence the crowd. His voice rose above the chatter as he began his thank you speech, and Billy found himself drawn into the orbit of his presence despite the nagging discomfort.

“Ladies and gentlemen,” his snobby voice rang out, silencing the room. “I want to thank you all for coming tonight to celebrate the unveiling of my latest collection.”

+ + +

So, this was the infamous Rob, Steve thought as the tall, dark-haired man started talking. A lot better looking than he had imagined, and, he had to admit, he could vaguely understand what Billy must’ve seen in the guy.

Rob continued his speech, his tone dripping with self-importance. “This exhibition would not have been possible without the support of you, my patrons and my friends, and most importantly, my muse.” Then he turned to look down at Billy with a wide smile, his hand reaching out.

+ + +

Billy’s heart stopped as Rob’s gaze locked with his. Oh, no. Please don’t. Not here, not now...

But it was too late. Rob was already reaching out, his eyes never leaving Billy’s. Once again, Rob did what he did best; put Billy in the spotlight so that he couldn’t say no.

Billy allowed himself to be pulled onto the podium, standing next to Rob.

Rob took his hand in his. “This man, this incredible, beautiful man, has been the inspiration behind every brush stroke, every color choice. My boyfriend, Billy Hargrove.”

Billy felt the color drain from his face as every head in the room swiveled to stare at him. Boyfriend? What the hell? We broke up months ago!

+ + +

Steve’s stomach twisted, his mind reeling. Boyfriend? Was this guy serious?

Rob had hurt Billy and Billy wouldn’t go back with him unless…

Unless…they’d made up.

Billy had been gone when Steve got home, and that was a few hours before this event was to start. What if they’d been talking things through and…

+ + +

Before Billy could protest, in a swift, fluid motion, Rob leaned in and captured Billy’s lips in a passionate kiss. His mind reeled as Rob’s lips moved against his, the familiar taste and scent of him flooding his senses with memories he’d tried so hard to forget.

+ + +

Steve watched, frozen, as Billy melted into Rob’s embrace, their bodies fitting together like perfectly sculpted puzzle pieces—and his heart shattered, the pieces scattering like shards of glass on the floor.

His eyes were stinging. Conflicting emotions washed over him, each one more painful than the last. The realization that he had lost his chance with Billy, that he had been too late, too cautious, too afraid, hit him like a wrecking ball.

You waited too long, and now look where it’s gotten you, he berated himself silently.

The bitter taste of regret lingered on his tongue, the weight of what could have been pressing down on his shoulders. He had missed his chance, and now he had to live with the knowledge that Billy’s heart belonged to someone else.

With a heavy heart, Steve made the swift decision to leave the gallery. He quickly slipped through the crowd, his steps laden with disappointment and regret.

+ + +

When Rob finally pulled away, Billy was breathless and shaking, a storm of emotions raging inside him. Shock, anger, confusion, and worst of all…a traitorous flicker of desire that he couldn’t seem to quench no matter how hard he tried.

With a shaky breath, Billy pulled away from Rob’s embrace, his insides blazing with a mix of hurt and determination. “I…I can’t…Rob, you can’t just waltz back into my life and pretend nothing’s changed,” he said, his voice low but firm. “You made it pretty clear that we’re over when you walked out of my life.”

Rob’s confident smile faltered, and he glanced at the crowd that was looking at them, a flicker of uncertainty in his eyes. “Come on, babe. We’re meant to be together. Why else would fate bring us here tonight?”

Billy shook his head, a mirthless chuckle escaping his lips. “Fate? No! You asked me to come, and I was stupid enough to do that. You’re just trying to mess with my head again. It’s not going to work this time.” He took a step back, putting some much-needed distance between them. “I’ve moved on. I’ve found someone who actually cares about me, who’s there for me when I need him. Someone who doesn’t just use me as a prop in his little art world dramas.” He said the last sentence louder than the rest, ensuring that at least the front row heard it.

Rob’s face darkened, his jaw clenching. “Oh, please. You expect me to believe you’ve found someone better than me? Who is this mystery man, huh?”

Billy turned away from Rob, determined to step down from the podium when his eyes spotted a familiar figure by the large windows of the gallery, quickly retreating towards the door.

Steve.

His heart seized in his chest as he watched Steve go out the door, his shoulders hunched and his head bowed.

And in that moment, everything clicked into place.

Steve had come after him. He wouldn’t be here, unless…Unless he had feelings—for him.

Without another word to Rob, Billy stepped down from the podium and pushed his way through the crowd, his eyes fixed on the door Steve had just disappeared through.

+ + +

The cool night air enveloped Steve as he stepped out of the gallery, a welcome change from the suffocating atmosphere inside. As he walked back to his car, he inhaled deeply, filling his lungs with the crisp, clean air, hoping it would somehow cleanse the pain that had settled in his chest.

+ + +

Billy burst through the gallery door, his heart pounding in his chest as he scanned the crowded street for any sign of Steve. The cool evening air hit his skin, a stark contrast to the stuffy atmosphere inside the gallery, but he barely noticed. All he could think about was finding Steve as he scanned the street with his gaze.

Come on, Steve. Where are you?

Just as he was losing hope, he caught a glimpse of the familiar dark hair turning the corner up ahead. His heart leaped in his chest, and he took off to follow it, dodging around a group of tourists who were blocking his path.

+ + +

Steve fished the keys out of his pocket, his fingers trembling slightly as he unlocked the door and slid into the driver’s seat. The familiar scent of leather and the soft purr of the engine as he turned the key provided a small measure of comfort, a reminder that at least some things were constant in his life that would remain unchanged.

As he pulled out of the parking spot and onto the street, he let his mind wander, replaying the events of the evening in his head.

The image of Billy and Rob, locked in a passionate embrace, seemed to be seared into his memory, a painful reminder of what he had lost before he even had a chance to truly have it.

+ + +

Billy rounded the corner, his breath coming in quick gasps as he searched the street ahead. There was no sign of Steve. He’d probably had his car parked near here and had just pulled off.

“Fuck!” Billy growled, startling an elderly couple who was just passing him. They mumbled something about manners as they continued on their way.

Billy turned on his heel and headed back towards the gallery, his mind already mapping out the quickest route back home.

He burst back into the gallery, his heart pounding and his mind reeling. Barely registering the curious stares and whispered comments from the other attendees, he made a beeline to the chair next to the podium, where he’d left his jacket.

As he shrugged it on, he felt a hand on his shoulder. “Babe, where are you going?” Rob asked, his voice laced with concern and a hint of annoyance.

Billy turned to face him, his jaw set and his eyes blazing. “I’m going after Steve,” he said firmly.

Rob’s eyes widened in surprise. “Steve? Who is Steve?”

“He’s the one.”

Rob rolled his eyes. “You’re going to run off after some other guy when you have me?”

Billy shook his head, a rueful smile playing at the corners of his mouth. “Rob, what we had was special, but it’s over. Steve is the one I want to be with. Don’t call me again. Ever.”

With that, Billy turned and walked away.

As he pushed through the gallery doors and out into the cool night air and towards the Camaro, he felt a sense of lightness for finally doing what he should’ve done a long time ago. Stopped hanging on to a guy who couldn’t commit and open his eyes to the one who had been there all this time—Steve.

[dragonflylady77]

i don't put out until the third date

Rating: T | Word Count: 1819 | fluff

B3 - ice cold cocktails for @harringrovesummerbingo

Summary:

Billy and Steve kissed in the closet at Max's house two weeks ago. Now they're going on an actual date.

The fic on Ao3 and directly follows ready or not

“Jesus, Billy!”

Billy put his wallet in the back pocket of his jeans and faced his sister. “What?”

“Must you really wear your shirt like that?” Max asked, with such a put-upon look on her face that Billy had to mess with her. It was his prerogative as her big brother, after all.

“Like what?” He made a show of looking down. The dark red shirt, unbuttoned to the waistband of his jeans, was framing his chest in a way that always garnered him lustful looks from women and men alike. “If you’ve got it, flaunt it, and all that.” He shrugged. “Besides, it’s like a hundred degrees right now.”

Max rolled her eyes. “Whatever. Behave, okay? Roscoe really likes Rosie, so don’t do anything to jeopardize that just so you can get laid.”

“Oh my fucking god, Maxine. We’re getting a drink, that’s it.” He put a finger up. “One cocktail.”

“Uh huh… and you’re driving? Is that a good idea?”

“For your information, I’ve ordered an Uber.” His phone dinged then and he picked it up, glancing at the screen before waving it towards Max. “See? That’s my ride. See ya!”

He heard Max muttering as he closed the front door behind him and took a calming breath before getting into the silver Prius waiting for him. He sent Steve a quick message to say he was on his way and sat back, fingers digging into his thigh to stop his leg from twitching.

He hadn’t seen Steve since Roscoe’s party and their unexpected seven minutes in heaven in Maxine’s coat cupboard two weeks ago. Billy had had to fly back to Seattle to iron out the last details of his transfer to the San Diego office the day after the party. 

He’d been happily surprised to get a text from Steve the next evening. Texting all day had led to long nightly calls talking about everything and anything. They’d even watched movies together while on a call. Now Billy was back in town, for good, and Steve had managed to find a babysitter so they were going on a proper date.

Billy couldn’t remember the last time he’d gone on an actual date. He had hookups, some even went beyond a one-night-stand, but people didn’t tend to hang around for too long. He’d made his peace with that. There was no happiness in begging people to stay when they were not interested. He’d been there, done that, got the trauma.

But this thing with Steve… it had taken Billy by surprise. He knew Max was worried, and he’d be lying to himself if he said he wasn’t as well. But there was something about Steve that was calling out to Billy and he was powerless to stop it. Moreover, he didn’t want to.

The car stopped outside a tall brick building with a sign for the cocktail bar Steve had picked for their date on the side of it, with an arrow pointing down an alley. Billy was unprepared for the temperature difference when he stepped out of the air-conditioned vehicle. He spotted Steve waiting by the gate, looking as nervous as Billy was feeling.

“Billy, hi,” Steve said when Billy walked up to him.

Before Steve could say anything else, Billy followed his gut and wrapped Steve in a tight hug. After a couple of heartbeats, Steve reciprocated and Billy let himself relax in his embrace. His face buried in Steve’s neck, he inhaled deeply, biting down on a moan at the mouth-watering scent of Steve’s cologne.

They let go of each other when a car honked at them, but Steve linked their fingers, smiling at Billy, who tried his best not to fucking swoon on the sidewalk.

“You okay there?” Steve asked, squeezing Billy’s hand.

Billy returned his smile. “Yeah, pretty boy, I’m good. Shall we?”

Steve nodded then led the way down the brightly lit alleyway to a little outdoor area complete with fairy lights, half a dozen tables and a firepit in a corner. They bypassed the door to the main area of the restaurant and walked up the couple of steps into Angry Fox, bespoke cocktail bar that was apparently home to the best mixologist in town.

A feature wall of rustic-looking red bricks and exposed beams, eclectic art and foxes sculptures on the wooden counter and the walls. Their side of the bar offered three bar stools. The person behind the bar had spiky bleach blond hair and was wearing a black t-shirt. Their arms were covered in tattoos and Billy was half a mind to ask them for the name of their tattooist so he could get his sleeve finished.

“Steve! Long time no see!” 

“Hey, Em. This is Billy,” Steve said, holding their entwined hands up. “Billy, this is Emily. They make the best cocktails.”

“Thanks for the vote of confidence. Here is our selection for tonight,” Emily said with a smile, gesturing to the board on the wall with the names of the various cocktails on offer.

Billy took a moment to peruse the rather short drinks list, reading the various ingredients that made up each cocktail, trying to decide which one he felt like.

“Our special this week is a Golden Mojito.”

“Oooh, I’ll have one of those, thanks, Em,” Steve said, getting his bank card out and turning to Billy. “Billy? What do you feel like? My shout.” He grinned. “You can get the next round.”

“A Rosebud, please.”

They took their ice cold cocktails outside, to a small table tucked in a corner by a fern.

“So you come here often?” Billy started, chuckling at the cliché he’d just uttered, before taking a sip of his drink. A moan escaped him before he could stop it at the flavors that exploded on his tongue. “Oh, fuck me…”

Steve laughed. “Told you Em was the best!” 

Billy tried not to stare at Steve’s lips wrapped around the metal straw because it was doing something to his brain. The courtyard was only lit by fairy lights but he suddenly regretted not taking a jacket, if only to have something to hold it in front of his crotch when he stood up later.

“How did you find this place?” he asked, in an effort to distract himself from the X-rated reel his brain was bombarding him with.

“Oh, um, my best friend Robin found this place when she visited after a break-up a couple of years ago. It was mentioned in a guidebook about queer places to visit in Cali that she picked up in San Fran.”

“Nice. But you haven’t been in a while?”

“Ah, well, Robin met her girlfriend Heather at a New Year’s party last year. They really hit it off, got engaged and moved to LA. Then, like I told you the other day, Nancy got that job in New York, so I ended up having Rosie full time. And sure, Max and Lucas offered to have her sometimes if I wanted to go out, but I don’t really date, or have anyone to go out with, so I just, yanno, stay home.” Steve’s eyes widened and he groaned. “Oh God, that makes me sound lonely and desperate and pathetic.”

Billy chuckled and reached over to take Steve’s hand in his. “Hey, pretty boy, stop putting yourself down like that. Nothing wrong with not dating and nothing wrong with hanging out with your kid. I have it on good authority that she’s a pretty cool kid and a great friend.”

“Thank you.” Steve turned his hand over and linked his fingers with Billy’s. “What about you? Go out much?”

Feeling his cheeks heat up, Billy took a big sip of his cocktail before he answered. He really liked Steve. They hadn’t quite broached the subject of their past dating history during their numerous phone calls and lengthy texting sessions. Billy decided to tell Steve the truth now they were face to face, hoping it wouldn’t put him off. 

He locked eyes with Steve and jumped in the metaphorical deep end. “I was in a relationship with a guy for about four years a while back. Turns out we wanted different things, and it didn’t end well. Then I had what Max refers to as my ‘slut era’ up until about two-ish years ago.”

The look on Steve’s face wasn’t one he was able to decipher but at least it wasn’t disgust. So there was that.

“What, um, what prompted you to end that, um, era of your life?” Steve stammered, his cheeks turning pink as he picked at a spot on the tabletop with his nail.

“I realized I didn’t like the empty feeling it left in my chest. And I got really busy with work. I was either at the office or crashing on the couch at my apartment. You know, Steve, with all the sleepovers you organize for the girls, I think you have more of a social life than I do,” Billy finished with a grin, squeezing Steve’s hand.

“But then,” Billy started again before Steve could refute his statement, “I was hiding in a closet at my sister’s house two weeks ago, and this really hot, really nice guy walked in, and he’s got these big brown eyes that see right through me, and this thick hair I wanna run my fingers through, and he smells really, really good.”

“Oh yeah?” Steve’s voice trembled a bit.

“Yeah… and then he kissed me and I haven’t been able to forget that kiss.” Billy leaned across the table, pulling Steve closer with their joined hands. “I’ve been dreaming about kissing him again, but more than that, I want to get to know him, learn everything about him, and I kinda hope he feels the same because I’d love to go on another date with him.”

“I don’t usually put out until the third date…” Steve said with a cheeky grin that made Billy want to devour him.

“Bold of you to assume that I do,” Billy replied with a smirk, screaming internally when Steve’s eyes locked on his mouth.

“You know, I was just thinking…”

“Yes?” 

“That time we made out in the closet kinda counts as a blind date set up by your sister.”

“Does it now?”

“Definitely. Which makes this our second date.”

“I think I can see where you’re going with this.”

“My ex mother-in-law has Rosie for the night, so if we were to go back to my house for a drink, that would count as our third date.”

“I like the way your brain works, pretty boy.”

“Shall we?” Steve said, standing up without letting go of Billy’s hand.

Billy followed Steve down the alley, and if he pressed Steve against the wall to steal a kiss one time or five on the way to the Uber, it was no one’s business but his and Steve’s.

[golden-redhead]

I'll definitely check your video out!

At this point I am not enterily sure that it was only something against David, but that Steve is just a sick perv.

Many people say it was predictable since season 2 and the chemistry they shared, which is already concering enough because the actor of Five was underaged and also the character he portrayed.

They had the great enemies to friends development, but season 3? The scene in the bathing room where Lila fights him naked, Diego saying if they bathed there together?

It seems like Steve waited until Five and his actor are aged up enough to make it legal. Which is not only disturbing, but also so sad for the development Diego and Lila had.

I'm not sure how many people know about it, but there's been allegations against Blackman made by the staff of TUA made shortly before season 4 came out. At the time, I wasn't sure what to think about it because allegations like these are always a bit of a he-said-she-said and, frankly, I had too much going on in my personal life to pay attention. But all of that combined with some of the choices made in the final season... Yeah, it's not a great look.

I agree that it feels like Blackman was playing the waiting game to give Five a romantic arc. And the age issue has so many layers to it, too, because it's a combination of multiple issues with both the characters' ages and the actors' ages and maturity levels. As someone only a few years younger than Lila's actress, I can't imagine kissing someone I knew since he was 15.

And it's not just Five and Lila but other characters and writing decisins as well. I am considering making a more in-depth post or even a video about Klaus specifically, but if I'm being honest... I don't even know where to start. There's just something inherently problematic about a queer man being repeatedly denied his bodily autonomy and presented in an unserious manner again and again despite the deep trauma he went through. It's irresponsible at best and downright harmful at worst.

And I'll be first to admit that yeah, Five and Lila had an amazing chemistry in their shared scenes in previous seasons, but I don't think chemistry always has to translate to romantic/sexual chemistry. They were a great duo and you can tell the actors enjoyed working together. Their enemies-turned-besties relationship was great and I wish they kept it that way.

[air--so--sweet]

The Keepers are one of the villains in season 4 of TUA or possibly the main villains. Yet we didn't see anything from them in the teaser, except for a split second shot of Jean and Gene dancing. We did see a fair amount of Reggie and the summary does mention him running a nefarious business empire, so I think we probably get some villainy from him. But I'm questioning if he'll be as villainous as we think.

I already posted about things in the trailer that made me think that that Reginald is going to take Claire, and Lila and Diego's daughter, and I do still think the kids are key to whatever happens, but what if seeing so much Reggie and so little of The Keepers is a misdirect? And maybe their children aren't taken, maybe it's more than that, maybe they're erased. This theory is based on nothing really but thought I'd share anyway.

The Keepers believe the word they're living in is a lie and we saw in the script page shared they look for things that are proof of anomalies - Jean and Gene buy two copies of Love on Loan, one starring Allison Hargreeves and on starring soneone else. So it's not too much of a leap to think that the Keepers know that the Hargreeves are involved, specifically Allison, and are going to believe that her and her family are responsible. And, I mean, they're kind of right - Steve Blackman has said more than once that Allison killing Reginald before he finished putting together the universe and doing whatever it was he had to to allow Allison to have Claire and Ray in the same timeline, at the same time, was going to cause issues this season. I think what Reggie was doing was merging timelines and him being stopped before finishing is why there are anomalies present in this universe.

I think that the Keepers will see Claire as wrong or not meant to exist is this universe, I'm not sure how or why but they'll believe the same thing about Lila and Diego's daughter, maybe because she was conceived in another timeline? And I think they will somehow erase their children from the timeline.

I think the Umbrellas will have to go to Reginald for help to undo it. And I think that's where the subway system comes in. The subway station seems to allow either for time travel or to cross timelines - personally I'm leaning towards the latter since we see Five and Lila in what looks like the original apocalypse but that didn't happen in the timeline they're in.

The writing seen in the station and on the subway stop the come out looks alien which is why I think.the station is connected to Reggie.

But I think that whatever they try doing using the subway doesn't work. Hence, devastated Lila, in what appears to be a subway station.

I think, that failing leads to another plan by Reggie and I think that plan is why we see Allison and Diego getting strapped into a machine by him, seemingly willingly. Maybe it's something to do with their Marigold and their children also having Marigold? And they can locate their children in this or another timeline by identifying the Marigold? Just a wild guess

As I said this theory is based on literally nothing and my original theory about Reggie taking the kids makes way more sense. But I thought this theory, while kind of batshit, was fun, so I thought why not share?

[edenmeowmeow-fiveliladni]

My opinion of s4(n the characters lol)(originally was posted on twt)

The s4 wasn’t that bad, tbh. But, for me the season ends at ep4, episodes 5 n 6 are extra. I mean, they, in that episodes ruined the whole show and the characters, Five with Lila,and in s3 they were one of my favorite duo's in s3. So for me Lila and Five are only best friends, not more than it. The maximum that I was waiting from them was the damn hug , and not *that* that we saw.

Claire, Allison and Klaus were amazing , I don't have anything say about them.

Luther, well he was pretty funny in this season, specialy when he found out something in CIA

Diego, the poor guy that his wife cheated on him with his brother. I wish the actors (Aidan n Ritu) can understood that, *that* seance was awful.

Ben, that thing that he put the marigold into their drinks was like "wtf Ben? They don't wanna their powers back", he was kinda egoistic this season, but the ending was weird.

Victor, was amazing, he was one of the best characters on this season and I really liked him! So I don't have to saw nothing more about him:)

The pain, of that season.

Five, he was the best written characters until ep4, so Five stays my fav character until s4 ep4, that Five that we saw in ep5 n 6 was NOT the Five that we saw earlier, Five for me is AroAce or Gay,that's my main headconnons for him.

Oh my god.. Lila, was other one bets written characters, ruined in s4 ep5 with Five.. What I have to say about her.. She was pretty good before ep5, so.. I have nothing to say about that...

Episode 6,oh my god. The one of weirdest episode I've seen in tua.. Five was like "guys, if we won't kill ourselves, the we will be ending the world over n over again" Seriously?? Yk, if Ben didn't put the marigold, nothing would happen of all of these things, Diego and Lila would live together, Five would continue his work at CIA, Luther would do his 'hobby' and Klaus with Allison would be living their lives.. If ben didn't put the marigold, the world wouldn't end. Back to ep6, they all died because of that big shit, and reborn as.. Flowers??? Huh?? Diego and Five died mad at each other, Allison had a daughter , and now she doesn't remember about her existing..

How I've said, the season is not that bad, but the ep 5 n 6 ruined, destroyed the show

So Steve blackman, don't you dare showrun again, you did good work at the beginning, but at the end you fucked up.

Anyways, If I draw fan arts about s4 (mainly Five), I would never draw him from ep5 and 6,ok?

[chemnections]

What are your thoughts on the fourth TUA season?

i just finished bingeing it and am in the processing phase right now. my very first impression of it is i didn’t hate it, but i am disturbed by the ending.

suicide isn’t the answer. and the world is better with you in it.

it is so disheartening to see this sort of ending on a story about a dysfunctional and abused family - it sends the message that it never gets better. but it can get better - it truly can. and maybe they were going for more of a nihilistic approach, a “life goes on until it ends”, maybe a classic “all the characters have settled down and had family’s and lived to an old age” was too “boring” of an ending for the weird interesting umbrella academy. that all the characters “tried” to have normal lives but never achieved 100% happiness at all times because that’s not what life is, life is hard and we don’t have the answers why. but imagine watching the first season for the first time then having the ending spoiled that they never truly worked through the dysfunction than they all committed suicide as a group - because they had “no choice” but come on they didn’t go down fighting and it was written so that they “wouldn’t have a choice” to justify it. but it is what it is. as an untreated teenager into nihilism i probably would have found it profound. but as an absurdist treated adult, this messaging horrifies me.

and they know it’s fucked up because they made sure to save the kids - because that’s a step too far (even though had would their kids exist without them ever existing?). as if orphaning them isn’t horrible and traumatic. and then to display them happier than they were before with their parents. . . sure they had their memories erased, but that doesn’t save trauma from missing parents even if they are loved and taken care of. asked people who never knew their parents, or even people born out of an egg/sperm donation. most do wonder/want to meet their birth parents.

one potential saving grace that has yet to be seen is if by killing the umbrellas, gerard is putting the narrative of mcr’s dysfunction, shade and break up to rest. i am hoping.

and it does worry me how this theme appears in gerard’s current art. it worried me when they released foundations of decay. “from his own hand his spirit flies”. i hope he has found a place of stability and relative happiness and these themes are retrospectives from a past dark point.

and before i get messages saying gerard doesn’t write for the show, imo he does have great influence over the show and that steve blackman consults closely with him. they are past the point of original material. i’m seeing quotes saying the rest of the writer team wasn’t onboard with the ending, but blackman was determined. the actors thought he was joking. if it really was left open to the writers and producers to decide the narrative of i think the brainstorming would have been a much broader conversation as it does take several minds to build upon someone else’s world. tinfoil hat on, i think blackman asked gerard what ending he wanted.

i actually like that lila had an affair in the sense that i was worried they were going to have her marriage and kid “cure her” of her lying manipulative ways. that actually marriage and being together would “cure” both diego and lila of their ills and problems which they would hold above everyone else. so maybe that’s why i like this season generally, it did subvert my expectations in a good way. because in a real sense diego had to learn that when you get into a relationship with a liar, that they don’t stop lying. and that lila wasn’t going to stop being cruel because of love. and fuck, lying that stan was his kid isn’t something he should have forgiven. he should have seen the signs and walked away. so i kinda like how this season roasts him a bit for his own inaction in his own life and his audacity to complain about it. like the line “lila said you couldn’t get pregnant when breastfeeding” - he should have educated and verified that for himself instead of playing the victim as if he didn’t participate. life just happens to him. and they barely showed the additional two children - but they are twins.

lila cheating with five was foreshadowed in season three. it was something that really stuck out to me. when diego asked confused what lila and five were doing together when she was in the bath. scene in the bath in general. “i’m shaving my nest you perv” - quote just off of memory. i thought it was a very weird suggestion, especially thinking of who those characters are based on. i brushed it off as being a fucked up fantasy being put in, maybe to piss someone(s) off. but now it can be seen that it was setting up the groundwork for the affair. i guess i should google how old aiden gallagher is, maybe they were waiting for him to come of age before putting his character into a relationship.

i have seen a steve blackman quote saying they wanted to put five into a relationship, but if they wanted more romance how about something established or star crossed lovers storylines they already had - like klaus and dave, or not have ray abandon alison for no apparent reason given. they also had ben. or kept sloan alive. or they could have brought back deloris because people did accept that way more than they did luther and allison. but there may be a practical availability and budget side to this.

and so many repeating themes along then way. the piss bottle lol.

still very much collecting my thoughts on all of this, would love to hear other people opinions!

[rebeccalouisaferguson]

Katie Jones for Variety

For Rebecca Ferguson, star and executive producer of the Apple TV+ series “Silo,” the layered mysteries hiding beneath the surface of the sci-fi drama remind her of the sometimes perplexing rules of England’s national sport, cricket.

“Every time you think you’ve solved something, whether it’s an emotional mystery or a connection or a bond, there is another hinder and another hinder,” Ferguson said. “And that’s what is so great about these stories, it just doesn’t end. And when you think you got the story, it’s like cricket, you just haven’t. It just evaporates. Did that make sense? Like cricket, like the game, it makes no sense.”

Ferguson sat down with her co-stars Steve Zahn and Common, as well as showrunner and executive producer Graham Yost and executive producer and author of the “Silo” book series Hugh Howey in the Variety Studio, presented by Google TV, at 2024 San Diego Comic-Con to discuss the upcoming second season of “Silo.”

“Silo” takes place in a dark post-apocalyptic future of Earth, where humans are forced to live in massive underground bunkers known as silos to protect themselves from the toxic refuse that contaminates the surface world.

For Zahn, a newcomer to the show, the process of joining “Silo” was a “very unique job.” Although he had to catch up on the expansively complex world set up by showrunner Yost in Season 1, he only interacts with one character in Season 2, Ferguson’s Juliette Nichols, due to the solitary nature of his character.

“It’s a huge world, there’s a lot of people involved, there’s a lot moving in and out with characters and this and that,” Zahn said. “But my character has been living alone for decades, and so I act with really one person here.”

“He’s weird,” Ferguson interjected about Zahn’s character. “He’s scary and weird.”

Season 2 also brings a rebellion within the confines of Silo 18, a rebellion that the head of security Robert Sims, played by Common, will have to deal with. Although the role was difficult for him, Common welcomed the challenge and was excited to explore all the repressed questions and insecurities within the head of Sims.

“Sims is experiencing a lot of things that may not even come out all the way yet in Season 2, but there are definitely some questions, at least in the way I approached this season dealing with the rebellion,” Common said. “It’s something being a part of the government [in ‘Silo’] for me as a person. Like, being a part of the people who established society and perpetuating the lies, or maybe some of it is the truth. It’s funny for me to play this character, but I love it.”

[starkstruck27]

One last little mermay fic because it's the last day and I thought it would be cute (also I may be posting on June 1st technically, but I wrote the bulk of it yesterday so...).

Steve hadn't been working at the aquarium for long, but he loved every second of it. He'd moved out to California a while ago and he'd been down on his luck when Dustin came out one time to visit, all jazzed up about marine life, since it was his latest obsession, and he'd suckered him into a trip to the place before he left again for Hawkins. Steve had never had much interest in undersea life before, but as Dustin dragged him through the exhibits, he found himself in awe of all the beautiful creatures. At the end of their tour, he was buying Dustin a souvenir in the gift shop, when a large "Help Wanted!" sign caught his eye.

"That, uh, that sign," he asked the girl who was scanning the barcode on Dustin's stuffed seahorse and new San Diego Aquarium cap, "Is that just for the gift shop or is it the aquarium in general?"

"No, it's for the whole place. We are looking for a few people to be cashiers in here and the food court, but we're also looking for tour guides and trainers. The trainers have to have some kind of prior experience working with animals though, so just keep that in mind. Would you like an application?" She asked, her smile bright as she handed the younger boy the bag.

"Yes, please," Steve smiled back, and the girl handed him a small packet of papers fill out before smiling and greeting the next customer.

By the time they left, Steve had already returned the packet, completely filled out, to the right box, and two days later, he got a call to come in for an interview. He went, and an hour later, walked out with a job as a tour guide and a date to come in for his first day of training.

By now, nearly two months later, he knew the ins and outs of the entire place, and he could spit facts about sharks or jellyfish or anemone or sea cucumbers like he was listing the days of the week. He was one of the favorites among the tour groups, since he often made stupid dad jokes and gave out aquatic themed stickers to the kids. It was a hands-on aquarium, and a lot of the parents liked the gentle encouragements he would give their kids if they were scared to touch a certain animal, and the kind ways he would explain how to do it properly so as not to hurt the animals so that everything went smoothly. He was often handed tips from appreciative parents, and even though he always tried to refuse them, they always insisted he take them for helping their young kids to have such a positive experience. His fridge in his apartment was running out of room on the front of it from the amount of drawings kids would do for him, and he had made a note to get himself a little scrapbook or binder or something to keep them in so that he didn't have to throw them away to make room for new ones.

So yeah, Steve absolutely loved his job.

And when his boss pulled him aside one day and said that he wanted him to be the one to help launch the newest attraction on May 1st, he was more than happy to do it. He was just supposed to lead the families into the amphitheater that faced the biggest tank in the aquarium and get them pumped up to see some kind of show involving mermaids. He had no idea what it was or how it was going to work, but he was excited to do it, so he did.

Finally, May 1st rolled around and Steve was about to do his first presentation for a packed theater. He scrounged up some of the old confidence he'd had in high school and put on a huge smile as he walked out in front of the tank with his notes, quieting the families and greeting them before asking if they were ready to see some mermaids.

That's what the whole thing was about. It was supposed to be like that one attraction in Weeki Wachee, Florida, where they had the actresses that dressed up like mermaids and entertained families in while swimming under water. It was pretty much the same as that, but while the actors and actresses were swimming around, Steve was supposed to give a presentation on some fun facts about mermaids and then, at the very end, the families would get to pose for pictures with the actors while they were still in the tank. They were going to be going down with air nozzles from oxygen tanks in their hands, so that they could make cool bubble effects, but also so they could still breathe as they were underwater. It was actually really cool, in Steve's opinion, and he was excited to be giving the presentation.

"Okay, so as long as you're ready to meet our merpeople, we have to try and call to them so that they'll come out to see us. Merpeople are king of shy, so we have to be really loud when we call their names, okay? We have a lot of merpeople here at our aquarium, but the ones you're going to see today are named Pearl and Nero, so on the count of three, we're all going to say really loudly 'Hi, Pearl and Nero!', okay?" Steve said as he continued his opening, smiling wide along with a lot of the kids. They all nodded as he counted to three, and they shouted out for the two actors, and they swam over from where they'd dropped into the tank, somewhere off to the side where the audience wouldn't see them going in.

The first 'mermaid', a girl with curly dark hair and tan skin, swam over, wearing a bright red shell bra and a shimmering red tail that caught the light beautifully. She pretended to be shy as she swam over, but she smiled as a manta ray came up to her, and she pet it gently as the kids all oohed and aahed.

"Everybody, this is Pearl," Steve said, gesturing at the tank, and the actress waved back at the audience, flicking her tail as she swam all around and did little tricks. She could hold her breath for an incredible amount of time, only having to use the breathing tube thing once or twice in the past couple of minutes.

"Now, Pearl is a little bit more brave than our other merman, so we have to call out for him again to get him to come out, okay?" Steve said, and the kids all called out for the guy again. The actress in the water even gestured over to someone with her hand as she swam around and played with the fish and other creatures in the tank with her. Finally, the kids all cheered as another actor swam over, looking more timid as he did.

"Everybody, this is Nero," Steve said, and he gestured at the tank, almost forgetting his next bit in the script when he saw the man. He had blonde hair that flowed around his face in ringlets. He had a tiny hint of a mustache on his top lip and the most striking blue eyes Steve had ever seen. His tail was also blue, probably to match his eyes, and as he waved to the audience and smiled, Steve nearly fainted. He was muscular, but not overly so, and his arms looked strong and sturdy, much like the rest of him. And his smile was bright enough to light up the entire ocean if he wanted to.

Steve made himself refocus on his presentation as the actors played under the water, swimming around and playing with both each other and the creatures in the tank with them. They interacted with the crowd as Steve gave his presentation, doing certain motions to go along with the fun facts Steve was spouting, and just seeming to have fun with it. Steve was too, once he got over the initial shock of that gorgeous man swimming around behind him, and when the presentation was over, he both happy and sad about it. The next show was going to be done by another one of his coworkers, and two other actors would be playing the merpeople, so Steve decided to head back to where he knew the actors would be taking their breaks to see if he could get a chance to talk to the guy.

He found him and the other girl laughing backstage as they ate lunch and gossiped, and he was almost afraid to go in and talk to them. They both had towels wrapped around their heads to keep their long, wet hair out of the way as they ate, and they both still had their tails on, since they had one more show to do before they got to leave for the day.

"Oh, speak of the devil," the girl said to the guy, and she gestured to the door that Steve was standing at, smiling widely. "You're our presenter, right? We were just talking about you. You did a great job hyping up the kids for us. Although, your jokes were absolutely terrible. I'm Heather."

"Oh, uh, yeah, I'm Steve," the man said, walking further into the room with them and tucking some hair behind his ears nervously. "Sorry to interrupt, I just figured that I should probably introduce myself to you guys at some point since we'll be doing a lot of shows together. And I wanted to compliment you on your performance, it was really, really cool. I don't know how you can hold your breath for that long and keep your eyes open underwater and still to all those tricks and stuff. It was just really amazing."

"Thanks," Heather replied, taking another bite of her sandwich, "And to tell you the truth, it's really nothing special. Just lots and lots of practice."

"And the oxygen tanks help a lot," the man said, the first time he'd spoken since Steve first entered the room. He didn't seem like he'd be a quiet person, but Steve figured that maybe he just didn't really like new people. He could understand that. Still, he'd hoped that maybe he'd have more to say than just that. Heather seemed to notice this, because she looked between them for a second, rolled her eyes at the man, and then reached down to unzip a part of her tail and stick her feet out so that she could shuffle off into another part of the room, saying something about needing to use the bathroom and leaving the two alone.

"I meant what I said," Steve said, stepping closer to the other man, "Your performance was really good. I've never seen so many happy kids in one room before. And you didn't even seem like an actor half the time there. You actually seemed like you lived in the water for real. And I'll tell you, you got a set of balls on you, too. I'd never have the courage to swim straight up to a hammerhead and just start petting it like you did."

"Thank you," the man finally cracked a smile as a cute little blush rose to his cheeks. "Yeah, I've always loved the ocean and anything having to do with it. And normally, I wouldn't have the balls to swim right up to a shark, but we keep them pretty well fed here, so I had nothing to worry about. But still, thanks for the compliments." The man paused again, setting down his sandwich, wiping his hands on a napkin, and training those striking blue eyes on Steve while he stuck out his hand and said, "I'm Billy."

Steve shook his hand, and he could feel his own face lighting up with a smile.

"Nice to meet you," he said, his heart fluttering when the other man's face finally broke into a full grin.

"Likewise," he said, and they began to slip into a more casual conversation as Heather returned and she and Billy finished their lunches and got ready for the next performance. Steve would have to leave soon to get his microphone and his notes sheet again, but he stayed for as long as he could, quickly becoming friends with the two actors and making a few plans to make their next show an even bigger hit than the last one was. Finally, it was just a few minutes before Steve would have to start welcoming families back into the theater, and Billy went off somewhere to do one last thing before the show.

"Oh, and hey Steve, I have a quick question for you," Heather said, just before he left.

"Yeah?" Steve asked, stopping just short of the doorway.

"Can I get your number?" She asked, thrusting a napkin and pen into his hands. "It's not for me, though, it's for Billy. Y'know, just in case you were wondering. He nearly choked in the tank earlier when he first saw you through the glass, however blurry. And he said you had a nice voice. But he's too much of a wimp to ask you himself, so write a corny little note and leave him your number so that I don't have to hear about how out of his league you are for the next fifty years, because he will complain for that long."

Steve was taken aback at first, but he was flattered, and he liked the other guy, too, so he decided, why the heck not? He scribbled down a note and his phone number quickly, then high-tailed it out of the room to be in the theater for his cue, just as Billy came back over.

"Steve asked me to give this to you," Heather grinned like a shark, handing him the note. Billy took it, puzzled, and almost missed his own cue to get in the water as he read and reread it to make sure it sunk in.

Steve left him his number. And a terrible dad joke, but mostly his number, and said he wanted to go out with him sometime. He'd said he wanted to be 'part of his world', and as much as the pun made Billy roll his eyes, he couldn't help but find it cute. He could definitely arrange that. But first, he had to get back in the water, and hopefully nobody would notice as he stared at Steve's ass through the glass.

And if they did, he could just pass it off as a merman curious about how the humans walked around on their two large fins.

[joes-sha-la-la-la-girl]

Love Bites: Chapter 11

Series Masterlist

It was no secret between Def Leppard and Ultraviolet that Joe and Y/N were seeing each other. They decided however, not to let members of the crew find out, mostly to protect Y/N’s reputation as she was still technically with Doug. 

The two of them spent every moment they could together, Joe even went on Ultraviolet’s tour bus a few times. When he was there, Tammy noticed the difference in her best friend’s behaviour, Y/N was more outgoing and confident around Joe. Everyone could see it.

However, Y/N had been so caught up in Joe that she had forgotten to call Doug in days. She was dreading the next phone call to him, having to pretend that everything was okay between them and that she wasn’t seeing Joe. Doug was already suspicious that Y/N was cheating on him and she had no idea how to hide that she was.

When they finally stopped at the next venue, Y/N decided to bite the bullet and call Doug.

“Where are you off to love?” Joe asked as Y/N wiggled her way out of his arms.

“I have to call Doug.”

Joe smiled sadly at her. “Do you want me to come with you?”

“I would say yes but I can’t let him know that I am with you and when you’re around I can’t stop smiling. He’ll hear it in my voice.” Y/N told him.

“Okay sweetheart. You know where I am.” Joe gave her hand a squeeze before letting go of her so she could call Doug. 

When Y/N dialled the familiar number, she was met with the answer phone. It was a bit of a shock to her because she didn’t realise that they had one, but she just shrugged it off that Doug had gotten one so he wouldn’t miss calls when he was out. Y/N left a short message on the phone before hanging up and returning to Joe.

“That was quick.” Joe spoke as he accepted her back into his hold.

“No answer.” She told him plainly before leaning up to peck his lips. Joe deepened the kiss, pulling her close to him by her waist. However, they were interrupted by mock gagging.

“My poor innocent eyes.” Phil joked covering his face and pretending to bump into things. Steve followed behind with uncontrollable laughter.

“There’s nothing innocent about your eyes Phillip.” Joe told him, slightly annoyed that they had been interrupted. Phil just looked at him in mock offence before he too burst out laughing. The two guitarists then left the room, off to who knows where, leaving Joe and Y/N alone again.

“We best get ready.” Y/N whispered as Joe moved to connect their lips again.

“Yeah, in a minute.” Joe then moved forward to kiss her again before eventually pulling away. “I’ll see you in a little while.”

*

A few days later they were in California. The one thing Y/N found about touring was that she was always so tired after spending nights on the bus. Nothing could take her excitement away, but she looked forward to the times she could spend either in a hotel or naps backstage if they arrived early.

California was better than Y/N could’ve imagined, Apparently Johnny was excited too because much like on the plane to America, he hadn’t shut up. Y/N wished that she could’ve joined Def Leppard on their bus just to get away from the over excited drummer. Their first Californian show was in Irvine. They were performing there for two nights before going to San Diego. 

Y/N still hadn’t managed to get a hold of Doug. She had tried to work out time zones so that she wouldn’t end up calling when he was asleep or at work but she could never seem to catch him. It wasn’t until after their first show in Irvine that she found out why.

Once Ultraviolet finished their set, like always they showered up and went back to watch Def Leppard perform. Y/N felt off for some reason. She felt like there was something different about this particular show compared to all the ones they had done before. It wasn’t until Gavin came around the corner that she realised what. 

“Look who I found.” The Ultraviolet manager announced unenthusiastically.

“Hello Y/N.”

*

Tammy had kindly said that she would tell everyone where Y/N had gone whilst she went to talk to Doug. 

“What are you doing here?” Y/N asked, obviously annoyed with her boyfriend’s presence.

“What, you're not happy to see me?” Doug asked with a smug grin on his face. He knew that Y/N didn’t want him on tour and he took much joy in the fact that he had given her no choice.

“How did you even know we were performing here tonight?”

“Well a guy from work mentioned about how his cousin had tickets to the first show in California so I booked a few days off of work and got last minute tickets. Though you should probably refund me, being your boyfriend and all.”

“That’s why you haven’t been answering.” Y/N said more to herself than anyone else.

“Anyway, aren’t you gonna hug me or something.”

“No. You should have told me you were coming. We have no room for an extra person. Or the money to accommodate them.”

“Not even me?” Doug asked with a faux pout.

“No. Not a single other partner has come along on tour. Not one person has invited themselves along either. What makes you so different?” 

“I need to keep an eye on you.”

“What?”

“Well it’s obvious Y/N. You don’t want me here so that you can sleep with whoever you want. I’m here to stop that from happening.”

“Is everything alright out here?” Y/N looked back and saw Joe make his way towards them. She could feel the nervous sweat pouring down her brow.

“Everything is fine. Isn’t it Y/N.” Doug wrapped his arm around her shoulders. She quickly moved away from him and closer to Joe. Not close enough though in her opinion.

“Actually it isn’t. Doug I can’t do this anymore.”

“Can’t do what?”

“This. You followed me halfway across the world to check on me, after I told you not to come. You dragged me out of a pub because you got embarrassed. You couldn’t even be happy for me when I started to get modelling jobs and that's only to name a few things.” Y/N took a deep breath. “I can’t do this anymore. We’re over.”

“You don’t get to decide that.” Doug laughed.

“Excuse me?”

“You don’t get to decide we’re over. Not after everything I’ve done for you.”

“This isn’t up for discussion Doug.”

Doug took a threatening step forward, however Joe stepped in the way. Up until that point he had kept quiet but he couldn’t let this idiot near Y/N.

“You heard her. Go.”

“Fine, I’ll go. But you're not getting anything out of my flat.” Doug tried to aggravate Y/N.

Before she could answer, Joe beckoned over security that the venue had and told them to ‘get rid’. 

“Let’s go find Tammy love.” Joe encouraged her and moved her back to the green room. 

After Def Leppard found out that Doug was there, they all gathered to wait for Y/N to come back. When her and Joe entered, Y/N immediately burst into tears in Tammy’s arms. Joe filled everyone in on everything.

“I’ll get my sister to get your stuff out of the flat before Doug gets back. Spare key still in the same place?” Tammy asked her as she passed the crying girl over to Joe so she could phone her sister. Y/N just simply nodded as she cried in Joe’s arms. 

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