#i said one mildly rude thing about how nobody bothers to tell me anything

[torchickentacos]

[diavolosthots]

Hey dear! I hope that you have a good time! I want to make a request, but please delete it if you don't feel like doing it.

I saved that request in the notes and been waiting for you to open them 😊

For request

First fight with brother (any of your choice) and one of them (I mean MC or that brother) thinks that it's end of relationship (because never had anything serious), but they reconciled in the end. I want some heavy angst with happy ending. MC can be GN if that is OK.

If you don't mind you can do for Mammon, but feel free to choose another one if you don't feel like write for him. Or if that would be better to write as headcanons for all the brothers. That's up to you!

I haven't been doing requests for ages. Please don't hate me if there is something wrong! I've read the rules, and I hope I haven't missed anything.

Anyway, sorry for long ask. And thank you for your writings!

(I forgot to look if you did anything similar, and remembered it at the end of writing that ask. Sorry if you already did something like that!)

Hey babes ❤ I did end up doing HCs for all of them because I thought it would be cooler (or more like I know someone is gonna request separate fics for all of them if I dont and I'm saving myself that trouble lol) I still hope you like it ! ❤ also this got SUPER LONG so its under a cut

Warning: angst -> happy ending-ish

THE BROTHERS in a fight with MC and thinking that they’re over (yikes)

Lucifer:

Everyone always says Lucifer is quick to lose his cool but he’s honestly been nothing but patient with you. He may have hinted at several things he doesn’t condone and he definitely has that ‘look’, you know the disappointed dad look, but he has held back a lot so as to not ruin the beautiful relationship you have with him. Everyone snaps, though, and when he finally did, it was ugly. He did NOT call you names, but oh he didn’t. He went straight for your feelings and pointed out every mistake you ever made for as long as he’s known you. Ouch. In his defense, you weren’t nice either. The argument ended nasty and ‘I hate you’s!’ were definitely thrown around, but none of them were meant, right? Goodness, he doesn’t know. After you left, he threw himself on his bed, literally, and just stared at the ceiling. His anger slowly fled away and he began to feel… guilty. Not necessarily because of the argument itself, but because he delivered some low blows and he knows that. Are you over? Done with him? You haven’t texted or called or talked… you’ve been actively avoiding him and he doesn’t like that, but his pride is such an issue, goodness. He can’t straight up apologize, that dickhead, but he’s sending you flowers and standing in front of your door with a sad face that says it all. 

“Forgive me? I made reservations at your favorite’s? We can talk over a nice dinner?” 

Mammon:

Mammon is known to get mildly agitated over the silliest things, let’s be real. He’s also quick to revert to the “are you dumb?!” argument, which is never effective. But he loves you and he would do anything for you so even if you do do something that he deems ‘dumb’, he usually bites his tongue. Doesn’t mean that doesn’t get on his nerves, though, and he definitely has a short temper, although people tend to overlook that. You just managed to push his buttons today and he used the “are ya stupid?!” argument, to which you obviously defended yourself, and rightfully so. This ended in a massive screaming match and him saying “Then leave! Ain’t nobody keepin’ ya with me!” He regretted it the minute those words left his mouth and you could see his eyes grow wide in shock at his own words, but that didn’t mean you stayed. “MC!” he tried running after you immediately but you were faster and honestly, who can blame you? He fucked up, and he knows it, and he feels terrible about it. Honestly, he’s crying just at the mere thought of you taking his words seriously and he can’t… he can’t bear to lose you, you know? What’s he gonna do? You’re the light of his life, as pathetic as that may sound to some…. So he won’t let you run away. Homie will hunt you down and beg for forgiveness. 

“Please, MC! Forgive me! I’m dumb, not you!!! Don’t leave me…” Don’t leave him. He will continue crying. 

Leviathan:

His constant need to put himself down is frankly, quite annoying. To you anyway. But you put up with it and just reassure him that, at least to you, he’s the most amazing demon that ever existed. It’s just facts. But a person only has so much patience, right? You can’t always spend your days trying to lift him up when all he does is dig himself a bigger hole. Who has the emotional time for that? You sure don’t. “Oh my God, Levi! Shut up! I can’t take it anymore!” Followed by “See! You’re just like everyone else! Leaving me!” and then you slamming the door to his room shut. It’s frustrating and understandably so. It makes you feel awful that you can’t even make your own boyfriend feel good about himself and get at least a little bit of self confidence and it’s so, so, so very draining to have to constantly listen to that. At this point, it’s affecting your own mental health and you just… you just can’t…. But Levi can’t lose you because he knows you’re right. He has to work on himself if he wants to keep someone as amazing as you with him and that’s why he’s crawling back to you now. 

“Look I… I know you’re right… I’m sorry. I promise I’ll … I’ll try. For you.”

Satan:

For being the Avatar of Wrath, you always admired Satan for his ability to keep cool. He prefers the relaxed and easy going life much more than the type of life people expect him to live, and you respect that. That doesn’t mean his constant need to one up Lucifer, through whatever means necessary, didn’t bother the hell out of you, though. You tried talking to him about it once or twice in a calm manner, but you always got the same answer “Pfft.. it’s Lucifer. Who cares?” And it never sat right with you. Just today he decided to pull a prank on the eldest and you had enough, standing in front of Lucifer and letting the bucket of cursed green slime land on you instead, to everyone’s shock. “What are you doing?!” Now that you’re thoroughly green from head to toe, you were also beyond pissed. “What am I doing?! What are YOU doing?!” But Satan matched your anger tenfold, accusing you of favoring Lucifer over him and oh! “You probably got an affair with him, too!” Which was a stupid thing on his part, but it looked like it the way you defended him. Anger doesn’t even begin to describe the emotion you felt running through you and had it not been for Lucifer, you probably would’ve physically fought Satan for such a dumb accusation. Lucifer took you to get cleaned up and lifted the course, giving you your natural skin and hair color back within a few days and plenty of scrubbing, and Satan felt like shit. You’ve always been there for him and, rationally speaking, he didn’t have a reason to doubt your loyalty to him, but he just can’t help but feel insecure beside Lucifer…. He decides to come apologize anyway, a deep blush on his face and guilt in his eyes 

“I’m… sorry for accusing you. It wasn’t my right to speak out of anger and jealousy…” 

Asmodeus:

How can anyone fight with the Avatar of Lust? Seriously, the guy is super easy going and he loves pretty much everyone. Not as much as himself, but almost. You on the other hand… you didn’t. Well you didn’t NOT love him or yourself, but you were just… you. You didn’t spend 4+ hours in the bathroom trying to get ready when you knew you were only going to the kitchen down the stairs. Like?? Although you never brought it up to Asmodeus, he constantly bothered you about skincare and what foods to eat and what not to eat, etc… It’s quite annoying, honestly, and at some point you just gave him a passive aggressive “Okay, whatever. Can we move on now?” To which he didn’t take lightly. He was still nice and sweet, trying to convince you that at least one of these things will make your skin glow brighter than a unicorn’s ass but you just had enough. “Can you stop?! You’re indirectly saying I’m ugly without that shit ton of product in my face and a diet that would make me starve before it helped me! If you want a skinny VS angel that barely holds onto their skeleton, get one!” It was more hurt and frustration speaking than anything, but your outburst still shocked him and he was taken aback for a moment. And then you ignored him for a week straight and as someone who thrives off of attention, especially the kind he gets from you, he can’t handle that! So he showed up in your room in sweats and a tshirt and messy hair and no product on his skin. 

“You’re right… we’re all naturally beautiful…. Wow that… that really hurts to say MC but can you forgive me?” 

Beelzebub:

Oh the sweet, sweet angel. He’s far from innocent and you know that. We all know that. But for this story, I will give him the benefit of the doubt. His reliance on Belphegor is just really… annoying. Belphegor this, Belphegor that. “Belphie used to…” or “Belphie said….” or “one day when Belphie and I….” Like why does everything have to include his twin? It’s so annoying and so rude when your significant other is right here !!! and planning their own future with you, Beel, thanks. It makes you feel less than and like Belphegor will always come before you. It makes you feel like shit, quite frankly, and who is to blame you? “Hey MC did I tell you what Belphie---!” “No! Shut up! I don’t care! It’s always about Belphie! The day you come to me and don’t let that name drip from your tongue is the day Jesus comes back to save me and we both know that will be never! I’m tired of always being stuck with Belphegor! We are not equals!” Granted, you shouldn’t have yelled and Beel was more than confused at your outburst, but you wouldn’t talk to him anymore after that so he left you alone. He thought you may need an hour or two, maybe a day tops, but that day turned into a full week and he even lost his appetite just because he knows you’re angry with him. It’s been a week, does that mean you’re over? His heart aches just at the thought… 

“I’m sorry for bringing Belphie up… I don’t want you to feel less than, MC. You mean a lot to me and so does Belphie, but you’re not Belphie and I need to learn that…”

Belphegor:

Honestly it’s a miracle he hasn’t lost his temper at you yet. Well, he partially blames it on his own laziness because if being angry or getting upset didn’t take so much energy out of him, maybe he would’ve snapped by now lol, but he tries really hard not to because he thinks your relationship with him after everything is pretty good, considering yall kiss and snuggle and fuck on a regular basis. But anyway, that’s exactly the issue. Considering everything, you’re still holding *that* against him. It’s never direct either, which makes it worse. It’s always said in a joking manner and something like “haha look it’s just like that one time you killed me” or “Beel’s grabbing that ham like you grabbed my throat” or “I remember seeing jesus for a moment there” and it agitates him. It makes him so angry, and he finally snapped. “I know I fucked up MC! Stop holding it against me! What do you want? A medal of honor? A survivor's certificate? Maybe a pat on the back for developing some sort of Stockholm syndrome that made you come back to your abuser?!” And then he left. And you may have cried both from confusion and your own anger, he isn’t quite sure. It’s just so…. Aggravating. He can’t deal with it. He knows it was a mistake spurted by his own insecurities and survivor’s guilt which ultimately led to his hatred but please, stop holding it against him.. He can’t keep putting up with it from the person he’s grown to love. He’s the one ignoring you and he won’t budge either because he’s a stubborn ass, but maybe if you come up first… 

“I’m sorry for yelling at you… I’m just so tired for it being held against me… I love you, and you should know that, and I do feel guilty about what happened.” 

[wordsablaze]

Live And Let Livestream

Jaskier's saturday nights are reserved for livestreams but sometimes they end up including wikipedia fraud, protective boyfriends who only half-know how to use the internet, and a spontaneous sleepover instead...

A/N: this is just a bit of fun inspired by the jaskel discord - love y’all <3

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Having a wikipedia page is pretty impressive and since Jaskier strives to be both pretty and impressive, it’s no surprise that he has one.

Well, he actually has two but nobody needs to know that. Either way, for someone as bothered about his reputation as he is, he pays very little attention to his wiki, often forgetting he’s even that level of famous until Yennefer teases him about it. Or until something inevitably goes wrong - It just so happens that he’s in the middle of a livestream when something does inevitably go wrong.

“...and yes, this is a new shirt, thank you for noticing, um- sorry, i didn’t catch your user! I’ll drop a link so we can all be scandalous together, hang on!”

He’s just about picked up his phone to check he’s got the right website in mind when it starts ringing. Cursing softly as he literally jumps, he shoots a guilty grin at his computer. “Can you guys pretend that didn’t happen so I can pretend I still have some dignity? Thanks, just give me a second…”

Ordinarily, he’d just put his phone on silent because all of his important friends know he spends Saturday evenings and often nights livestreaming. But it’s Eskel calling and he’s not about to be rude and decline someone who bakes him brownies whenever he has a meltdown now, is he?

“Is everything okay, darling?” he asks.

“Can you end your stream early? I think you’ll regret giving people a live reaction to this.”  

Jaskier frowns harder, reluctant to break his promise to the followers he only somewhat childishly considers to be his friends. “What is it? Are you all okay?”

He hears Eskel sigh. “Maybe at least mute the thing?”

Rolling his eyes, he clicks the mute button and types the link for his shirt into the chat along with a brief apology before focusing back on Eskel. “You’re worrying me, what happened?”

“So you know that wikipedia page we were talking about the other day?”

He nods, then realises Eskel can’t see him. “Uh yes, my page, what about it?”

“You might want to take a moment to take a minute to see for yourself?”

“What is it with you guys and being so cryptic? You don’t even all share the same genes so it can’t be that. Maybe it’s just the kind of people I attract, not that I’m complaining per se but still,” Jaskier mutters to himself even as he googles his own name.

He truly has no idea what Eskel was trying to get at until the page loads properly, at which point he blinks at the photo staring back at him. The photo that is most definitely not the one Essi had jokingly submitted and somehow managed to keep there because shut up about my terrible phone camera quality already, you actually look candid so who cares?

“Is this a joke, Esk? What the…” he trails off, scrolling to find lists of achievements and songs and facts that really shouldn’t be associated with his name. Not that it’s his name currently on the page.

“Oh, for the love of-" his breath hitches as he sees a parody of his own song written off as Valdo's- "actually, screw that! There is no love here, what exactly does he think he’s doing? Ugh, can’t a guy livestream in peace nowadays?”

“I’m sorry, Jas. Geralt just told me and I-”

“Geralt was on my wiki?” Jaskier finds himself asking, grinning at the very thought.

“I… wasn’t supposed to tell you that. Uh, yeah? I mean, he actually came and asked me how to email wikipedia but we kind of figured it out from there so…”

Jaskier laughs despite his frustration, his urge to punch Valdo morphing into an urge to kiss his boyfriends. “Who’s ‘we’, by the way?”

Before Eskel can answer, Jaskier’s computer starts rapidly beeping, at which point he turns back to the live and promptly curses when he sees the dozens of messages in the chat asking who Valdo Marx is or, from people who already know who he is, messages asking whether they have permission to throw hands; he'd be lying if he said those messages don't warm his heart.

“I didn’t mute the thing properly. Gods, I’m turning into Vesemir,” Jaskier groans, then slaps his free hand over his mouth and glares at his camera. “None of you tell him I said that, you hear me? I do love him so.”

“How would they even find Vesemir?” Eskel asks in his ear, clearly amused.

“Remind me to remind you how deeply the internet works later. More importantly, you haven’t mentioned Lambert or Aiden yet and I know for a fact they were heading to yours today so…?” Jaskier asks, hoping the former hasn’t punched a wall again or anything like that.

Eskel clears his throat awkwardly. “Yeah, they were heading to ours but they… well, uhm, they called to say they took a detour.”

“To mine?” Jaskier asks, frowning at the thought. He’s more than capable of fixing his own wiki page and as much as he appreciates the moral support, he doesn’t really need any of his loved ones’ presence for such a trivial matter. And anyway, he was already planning on joining the others in the morning so they could spend Sunday together, which means coming over to his makes no sense.

“No, not to yours. To Valdo’s…”

Jaskier’s eyes widen.

Throwing hands on social media is one thing but he doesn’t want any kind of misleading vagueposting from the likes of people who need to steal other people’s wikipedia pages in the direction of people who have no fault other than mildly violent forms of love, and especially not on his behalf.

“What are you still doing on the phone? Go derail their detour! I’ll be there as soon as I can too,” Jaskier says to Eskel, blowing him a kiss through the phone because he knows it’ll make the other man blush.

Once he’s hung up, he turns back to his camera with a pout. “Right, sorry guys, I’ll have to cut this one short so my darling idiots don’t ruin their evenings for the sake of a pathetic leech who just will not let me live! Okay, I promise some cute instagram selfies in exchange for this mess but for now, I’ll see you next week! Alright, bye!”

This time he does press the right buttons and closes both the live and the computer down even as he grabs his coat. Forgoing socks in favour of making sure nobody except Valdo’s weekend gets ruined - he already knows Yennefer or Renfri will be more than happy to throw shade his way to make him regret his failed publicity stunt - and pulling on a pair of boots really not designed for driving, he makes his way out of his apartment as fast as humanly possible.

There’ll be time to be angry at Valdo again later but he’s more than aware that between his family, his friends, and his followers, it’s simply not a big deal. He signed up for drama when he signed up for being famous and yes, he loves fighting against anyone or anything that tries to stop him from sharing his music, but he’s really not about to waste any more time worrying about all that at the moment.

At the end of the day, it's nice to be pretty impressive but there's nothing better than being pretty loved.

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what are the logistics of this au? whatever you want them to be ;)

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thanks for reading! masterlist | witcher blog: @itsjaskier

[ibijau]

Worst engagement AU // on AO3

Jin Zixuan, without meaning to, seems to have acquired a friend.

Out of everything they learn in the Cloud Recesses, Jin Zixuan finds etiquette lessons to be the most useless. He knows how to conduct himself. Unlike some people, his parents made sure to properly educate him even before he came to this place. In fact, early on he wrote to his mother so she would request that he be excused from etiquette lessons. She answered that since he is so wise already, she expects him to have perfect grades in that subject, or else. 

With that threat still in mind, Jin Zixuan pays extra attention to the lecture today, never once looking away from Lan Qiren. This is helped by the fact that there's nobody to pester him today, since Nie Huaisang is sitting near Jiang Cheng at the moment. Good for him. Jin Zixuan doesn't want to deal with him anyway, not after being stood up yesterday. 

Not that Jin Zixuan cares about that. He never actually agreed when Nie Huaisang announced he'd be dropping by the Jin cabin after his much reviled weekly meeting with Lan Xichen. In fact, Jin Zixuan explicitly told the other boy not to bother. And so, Nie Huaisang didn't come. Which is good. It's about time Nie Huaisang learned to respect boundaries.

Too bad boundaries make for boring days. 

The morning lecture drags on and on and on. Jin Zixuan thinks he can see movement coming from the direction where Nie Huaisang is sitting, and he's almost sure he hears his name called out once in a loud whisper, but he ignores that. He's not this desperate for attention, and some people here are serious, diligent students. 

When finally they are freed for lunch, Jin Zixuan doesn't even have time to rise up before Nie Huaisang flops onto his desk with a pout. 

"Jin-xiong, didn't you see me waving at you earlier?" 

"I didn't. I was listening to Master Lan." 

"Liar," Nie Huaisang accuses with a grin, stretching like a cat over the desk. "I watched you, you were almost falling asleep. Jin-xiong, are you angry at me for yesterday? It's not my fault you know, stuff happened. I'll tell you about it while we go to lunch. I am so cross at Lan Xichen!" 

"You always are," Jin Zixuan retorts. "Isn't this your day with Jiang gongzi anyway?" 

It's not a formal arrangement, but usually Nie Huaisang alternates between spending time with Jiang Cheng on one day, and pestering Jin Zixuan the other. Yesterday should have been Jin Zixuan's day, so today ought to be Jiang Cheng's. It's not a bad system, though it reminds Jin Zixuan of home in ways he doesn't quite like. 

Nie Huaisang shrugs and fiddles with his fan, glaring at Jiang Cheng who is leaving with the other boys of his sect. 

"Since there's a test coming, he said he wants to study," he grumbles. "Grades don't even really matter! I swear, he's too serious. And I have no intention to be serious whatsoever, so I'm going to stay with you this afternoon. You're not planning on studying, right?" 

"Maybe I am." 

"Then I'll have to convince you otherwise," Nie Huaisang retorts, grabbing Jin Zixuan's arm by the elbow and pulling him up as he rises. 

Resistance is futile. Nie Huaisang is surprisingly strong, even though he's shorter than anyone in their class. Jin Zixuan tries to at least get his arm back, in vain. They are still elbow to elbow as they start walking toward the dining halls. 

"So, did it go badly with Lan Xichen yesterday?" Jin Zixuan asks, even though he knows that he's exposing himself to a three hours lecture on everything that's hateful about Lan Xichen. He's not concerned about what might have pushed Nie Huaisang to cancel their plans without warning, just… curious.

"I don't even want to talk about it," Nie Huaisang sighs. "He was almost nice at first, you know. I mean, actually nice, like a real person. He smiled!" 

"Isn't he always smiling?" 

"A real smile! A human smile, like he was happy to chat! And I almost had fun!" 

"How dreadful," Jin Zixuan mutters, rolling his eyes. "You, having fun with your own fiancé. I can't imagine what that's like."

"Watch what you say," Nie Huaisang warns. 

Jin Zixuan grimaces and nods. It has been made clear to him that he's allowed to complain about his now dropped engagement in general, but cannot say anything against Jiang Yanli personally. Nie Huaisang is rarely serious, but Jin Zixuan has a feeling that for this, he would be. 

"So we were very nearly having fun," Nie Huaisang resumes as they get close to the dining halls. "But then I tried to help him paint something, and so I took his hand, and I swear, you’d think a worm had fallen on his hand. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone more disgusted. Can you believe that? I know he doesn’t like me, but that was rude.”

“Did he say he was disgusted?”

“Oh, you should have seen his face. No doubt possible. What else could it have been, anyway?”

Jin Zixuan doesn’t answer right away. What else, indeed?

Last time Jin Zixuan visited Lotus Piers with his mother, Jiang Yanli noticed a scratch on his hand, from sparring a little too intensely with her little brother. It was nothing big, but she’d seen it anyway and, as if it had been the most natural thing in the world, she had taken his hand to inspect it and offered to clean it. Her fingers had been gentle, and her voice soothing, and she’d seemed genuinely worried for him, so of course Jin Zixuan had panicked. He had pushed her away, saying something about his cultivation being more than good enough that such a small wound didn’t matter to him like it would have mattered to her. His tone must have been really bad because she had cried, and then her idiot brothers had run to the rescue, and everything had been such a huge mess that Jin Zixuan had come out of it more convinced than ever that he hated that whole family.

All because Jiang Yanli was nice to him, and he never knew how to handle that.

He wonders if Lan Xichen too is the sort to panic. It doesn’t seem likely, everyone always praises his calm, but honestly Jin Zixuan has heard the same thing said about himself. He knows the worth of people's praises of an influential young master.

“Maybe he likes you and was secretly flustered,” Jin Zixuan hazards.

Without surprise, Nie Huaisang starts laughing at the suggestion, a little too loud for the dining halls which they’ve just reached. It attracts the attention of a few Lans, including Lan Xichen himself who stares at them with a blank face. Since he has a sense of propriety, unlike some people, Jin Zixuan tries to free himself from Nie Huaisang’s hold. It still doesn’t work. Nie Huaisang keeps him close, which probably should annoy him more than it does, and pulls him toward some empty seats. Only then does Nie Huaisang finally let go of his elbow.

“I miss eating real food,” Nie Huaisang says, pouting at their meal of rice, boiled vegetables, and bitter soup.

“Sometimes I think I’m forgetting the taste of meat,” Jin Zixuan agrees, poking at the cabbage in his bowl before making an effort and eating it. 

It’s exactly as tasteless as he expected. He’s used to the rich, heavy foods of Carp Tower, and these few months in the Cloud Recesses have been a torture.

“We should go to Gusu one afternoon,” Nie Huaisang suggests, making no effort to eat anything. No wonder he’s so small if he’d rather starve than swallow something he doesn’t like. “It’s been a while, and if we fly, we can be there for dinner and still get back before curfew.”

“Don’t you hate flying?”

“I do. But for a chance to eat something that actually has a taste, I’d even crawl,” Nie Huaisang mutters. “I miss the food from home. Our cook makes that soup in winter, it’s the best thing ever. It’s just so good, there are no words. You’ll see when you come visit.”

“Who said I’d come?” Jin Zixuan protests.

Nie Huaisang laughs, still too loud for this place, and forces himself to bite a piece of mushroom.

“Of course you’ll come, and we’ll have a ton of fun. Qinghe is the best place in the world, and we have the best food in the world, you’ll love it. And Carp Tower isn’t very far, it’d be easy. Jiang Cheng has promised already that he’ll come with Wei Wuxian, and they’re much further away. If they can come, so can you.”

“Telling me they’ll be there does not make it very appealing,” Jin Zuxian points out.

“I’m not stupid, I won’t let you come at the same time. Not until I’ve gotten all of you to get along,” Nie Huaisang threatens.

At least, it feels like a threat to Jin Zixuan. He doesn’t think Nie Huaisang could manage that, because Jin Zixuan believes the Jiang boys are two horrid little beasts with no respect who need to have manners beaten into them, while they’ve made it clear they're convinced he’s stuck up and boring. There’s just no common ground to be found.

Then again, not long ago Jin Zixuan wouldn’t have thought he’d ever have common ground with Nie Huaisang either.

“I’ll have to see if my father allows it,” Jin Zixuan conceded. “If he does, I might visit you.”

“And if he doesn’t, then I’ll be the one coming to Carp Tower,” Nie Huaisang retorts. “I bet there’s a lot of fun to be had there too.”

“I didn’t invite you.”

“I’m inviting myself. Come on, Jin-xiong. I’m the funniest person you know. Of course you’ll want to see me again after this. Who else can you chat with? Jin Zixun?”

Jin Zixuan huffs in disdain at the idea. His cousin is a tolerable companion for Night Hunts, and because they’re so closely related they’ve always spent a lot of time together, but they only mildly get along. If they had any other choice of friends, Jin Zixuan is sure they’d have fallen apart long ago.

They might, now that Jin Zixuan does have someone whose company he does enjoy, even if he’s reluctant to admit as much. And if Nie Huaisang comes, they can visit bookstores to hunt for poetry, peruse his home's vast library and gardens, or go visit the goldsmiths and cloth merchants of Lanling.

It’s not an unpleasant thought.

Maybe Jin Zixuan will write to his father, asking both to be allowed to visit Qinghe and to have a guest now and then. Or better yet, he’ll write to his mother, since she’s the one who is most likely to spare a moment to give him that permission. Stern as she is, his mother would certainly be happy to hear he’s made a friend.

[aredhel85]

Took me a while (almost 20 years) but I finally wrote a fanfic about one of my favourite pairings ❤

https://archiveofourown.org/works/25637302

~Care~

It wasn’t the first time Clark seriously contemplated blurting out the change in his relationship with Lex. And now, sitting in front of the TV with his parents on late afternoon, it also wasn’t the first time he decided that it was a better idea not to do that just yet.

How could he tell them that two months ago his best friend had become so much more when his father already hated said friendship? He was only 17 and would be for several months more. If his father wanted to stop Clark and Lex from seeing each other – and he would want to – he would probably hardly see his now boyfriend until he was 18 and at the moment that seemed like the worst outcome possible.

So he kept his mouth shut despite wanting nothing more than share his happiness with his parents.

While he was still thinking about this, the roar of an engine with a lot of horsepower could be heard in their driveway.

Surprised, Clark looked up to see Lex’s new black Lamborghini there. What was he doing here at that time? Only yesterday he had lamented about how he was going to spend the whole afternoon and probably early evening in a meeting that would be so boring that it would possibly result in brain death.

And yet here he was.

Usually Clark would have smiled in anticipation to see him, but there was so much wrong right now.

It had started with his driving. Usually Lex did his best to drive reasonably when there was a chance that Jonathan Kent was around. The frown on his father’s face told Clark that he did not consider the roaring engine, the speed or the full break in front of the house reasonable.

Also, Clark knew the look on Lex’s face, sure, but thankfully it had never been directed at him or his family. Clark swallowed hard. Now there was no one else and the blank look on his face, the stony expression in his eyes as he swiftly walked towards the farm house could only be aimed at one of them.

The door swung open. None of the usual politeness Lex always displayed towards the Kents, despite Jonathan’s own rude behaviour. The door slammed shut and Clark flinched involuntarily.

When Lex came into the living room, Jonathan was already on his feet, glaring at him. “What the hell is this about, Luthor?”

Martha and Clark exchanged uncomfortable and puzzled glances.

“We need to talk, Mr. Kent. All of us.”

As if owning the place, Lex walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table, on which he placed a white envelope which Clark hadn’t noticed before, obviously expecting to be joined by the Kents.

Everyone followed him, although it was easy to tell that Jonathan was fuming.

Lex looked at him with an icy cold expression that made Clark almost shiver. What the hell was wrong? He knew how very much Lex wanted to be accepted by Clark’s family. Why was he behaving like this?

When he spoke, his voice was steel. “I don’t care what you are keeping from me. I don’t care why my Porsche was opened up as if someone had used a giant can opener on it. I also don’t that no one wants to tell me why Clark is capable of getting from here to my mansion within seconds when he thinks I might be in any danger. I don’t care if it’s because of the meteor rocks, healthy diet or because he’s an alien from outer space.” He cut off Jonathan’s attempt to speak by simply lifting his hand. His voice, if was possible, grew even colder. “I would, however, appreciate it, if you applied the same amount of care to other aspects of your lives.”

He pushed the envelope towards them. “That’s what I received this morning together with a letter that I already disposed of.”

Gingerly, a very pale Martha Kent took the envelope and Clark felt physically ill when he saw pictures of himself, lifting Jonathan’s car, so he could easily change the tires. Pictures of him lifting the tractor so Jonathan could once more repair the old thing.

One look at his parents told him that they just as horrified as he was.

“Burn them and don’t worry about it.”

Dumbfounded, they all looked up at Lex again.

Clark didn’t understand. Don’t worry about it? Someone knew about him! Someone had seen this and there were photos to prove it! How could he not be worried?

“If you look again, the negatives are also in the envelope.”

“But … the person who made these … what will he do?” Martha’s voice was fearful, more fearful than Clark had ever heard her.

“He’s busy buying his own private island for all I know. Or new trousers to begin with.” Lex leaned back and looked at them. “I paid his price. And the money came with the clear indication of what will happen to him if he messes with you again.”

“What did you pay?” Jonathan’s voice was very quiet and all colour had left his face.

“It doesn’t matter. That’s not the point Mr. Kent. The point is that there were far too many lucky coincidences for my taste.” He leaned forward again, his forearms on the table, looking Jonathan firmly in the eyes. “First, this person was from Smallville, he knew Clark and I are friends, which is why he came to me in the first place. Otherwise he might have gone to the government, some lab or scientists, or worst case: my father. The government or labs I might be able to bribe or threaten, although there will certainly be some who would give their right hand to lay the other on Clark, but as soon as my father is behind it, there’s nothing I will be able to do. There’s no way in the world I could convince him to give up on something like that.”

He allowed them a moment to let this sink in, then he continued. His voice wasn’t as cold anymore, but still very matter-of-factly. His face didn’t show any emotions. “Then there’s the fact that my assistant usually opens my mail and as the envelope was only addressed to Lex Luthor and not marked confidential or personal or whatever, she would have opened it and then someone else would have seen the pictures. I generally trust her, but with this …” He gestured to the photos that still lay on the table and trailed off. “Fortunately, she called in sick this morning and as I was waiting for an important document, I opened the mail myself.” He sighed. “As I said, too many lucky coincidences. You may feel save on your farm, but it is not exactly Fort Knox.”

Clark couldn’t remember ever feeling so miserably in his entire life.

Well, in fact, he did remember one occasion. Two months ago, when he had confessed his feelings to Lex, his friend’s reaction had been … no reaction at all, then a feeble excuse for having to leave immediately and 24 hours of radio silence. Clark had sent him like 20 text and speech messages, apologizing, begging him to call, reassuring him that he would not bring this up again, as long as he hadn’t ruined their friendship.

Then Lex had turned up in Clark’s loft in the barn, said he was sorry, but he didn’t think that this was a good idea. As it had turned out, it hadn’t been because Lex didn’t feel the same way, but because the men in his family had a history of making their partners unhappy, to say it mildly. He had been afraid to start a relationship with someone he truly cared about because he might end up hurting this person, hurting Clark. Clark had reassured him that he trusted him more than anybody, except his parents, had told him over and over again, that Lex wasn’t like his father or any other Luthor before that, that he was a good person. Eventually, Lex had given in, under the condition, that Clark would immediately tell him, if he did something wrong.

And now he had been the one who had paid what was probably an absurd amount of money for their thoughtlessness, who had obviously dropped all work today, including an important meeting, because he had had to get that money, bring it to the one who had taken the pictures and make sure that this guy would not bother them again. And now Clark also understood the reason for his behaviour earlier.

He had spent the day terrified. Terrified that something wouldn’t go according to plan, that something would go wrong when handing over of the money or that this would happen again and this time it would not be Lex who’d receive the photos. And Lex never showed fear, least of all in front of anyone who wasn’t Clark. So he had chosen anger instead. And to be fair, they deserved it.

There was something else that weighed heavily on him: He hadn’t told Lex his secret yet. He had planned to, but he had been too afraid. Not because he didn’t trust Lex, there was something else he feared much more than betrayal.

For at least a minute or two now, everyone had been silent, nobody seemed to know what to say, so Clark said very, very quietly “Alien from outer space”, quoting Lex from earlier, not looking up.

He knew everyone was staring at him.

Typically, it was Lex who found his voice first. “Come again?”

Now he looked up met into his boyfriend’s eyes. If he was still his boyfriend or even his friend. Who wanted to be with someone who wasn’t even from the same planet? “I’m an alien. I’m not from this planet, my ship came down with the meteorites.” Before Lex could say anything, he continued in a rushed voice, his tone begging Lex to believe his next words. “I didn’t not tell you because I don’t trust you, I was afraid you’d run for the hills as soon as you found out. Or at least for Metropolis. And that I’d never see you again. You’ve been … my best friend for almost three years. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

For a moment Lex just stared at him, then the corners of his lips twitched upward ever so slightly. “Clark, I’m disappointed you still underestimate my nerves. Why would I run? My father is the literal devil – do you see me running? A mere alien can’t shock me.”

Clark couldn’t help it, a small laugh escaped him and Lex finally gave him a real smile. He knew Lex well enough to interpret this reaction the right way. He didn’t hate him, not for being careless, not for keeping this from him.

He wouldn’t lose him for being what he was.

To his surprise, even Martha escaped a giggle. It might have been a little hysterical, but nobody commented on that.

Only Jonathan remained silent, thoughtful.

When everyone else was quiet again, it was he who spoke. “I don’t know … how to thank you for that.” He looked at Lex. “You’re right, I’ve been careless and that endangered him needlessly. And considering I will never be able to pay you back, I’m not sure I want to know what amount you paid today.” He was clearly ashamed of this.

“Mr. Kent.” Lex’s voice was calm again. “Please don’t worry about the money. That was the least of my concerns today. And you don’t have to thank me. I know you don’t think very highly of me, but I wasn’t thinking of the money when I came here admittedly a little angrily. I just want you to be more careful. If you believe it or not, Clark is very important to me and I don’t want anything to happen to him. And please don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone about what he just told me.”

Jonathan sighed, leaning back, but never taking his eyes off Lex. “I think I owe you an apology.” His voice was still quiet, but also very sincere. He held Lex’s gaze. “The way I’ve treated you from day one is unforgivable. To assume that you’re like your father without knowing you was highly unfair. You probably shouldn’t even forgive me for that. Still, thank you for being a good friend to Clark. I certainly wasn’t helping.”

Clark felt the sting of tears behind his eyes. He had wanted this so much and being able to read Lex’s body language, even if to most people he had the perfect poker face, he could easily tell that this meant just as much to him as it did to Clark.

“Thank you, Mr. Kent.” His voice was quiet, controlled, but maybe a bit too controlled. Even to his parents this should be obvious. “And don’t worry. There have always been people who judged me for my name and there probably always will be. You’re the first to apologize, though, so in my book we’re good.”

God, how much Clark wanted to hug him right now!

He took a deep breath. It was probably now or never. Before he could think about it too much, he spoke up again. “Ok, I guess it’s time for another big revelation.” He looked from his parents to Lex and couldn’t help but grin broadly. “Is that panic in your eyes, Mr. Luthor? I’m shocked.”

Lex raised his eyebrows. “Does your father really own a shotgun?”

“Yeah, but I don’t think it’s loaded.”

“Great,” he commented drily.

Clark looked back at his parents who just gave him confused looks, although he was pretty sure there was something more than confusion in his mother’s eyes. Had she guessed already?

“Well, Lex and I … We’re not just … friends anymore.” He gave them a sheepish half-smile. “We’ve been more for … like two months. I love him.” The last sentence had come out without any stammer or hesitation. He did love Lex and he wanted to spend the rest of his life with him. And he desperately wished for his parents to approve.

The silence that followed was broken by Lex’s steady voice. “And I love your son.”

Clark’s smile grew wider and he reached across the table to grab Lex’s hand and was rewarded with a gentle squeeze.

His parents exchanged glances, then Jonathan sighed. “Well, does anyone else need a drink?”

“Yes, please.” Lex didn’t let go of Clark’s hand as he said this and probably had no idea how much his boyfriend appreciated the gesture. He knew Lex wasn’t big on showing his feelings in front of other people.

“I take one, too”, Martha said as she smiled at the two of them.

“Me too.”

“Nice try, buddy.” Jonathan looked pointedly at his son, got up and turned around. Then he once more turned back to the table to look at Lex. “You don’t let him drink at your place, do you?”

“Of course not.”

“Dad, I was joking.” Clark rolled his eyes.

Jonathan just nodded, left the room and returned with of what Clark was sure had to be the cheapest Whiskey Lex had ever touched.

To his boyfriend’s credit, he didn’t say a word as he let go of Clark’s hand to accept the glass Jonathan offered.

Martha did the same and they all enjoyed their drink.

Well, some more than others, Clark observed, as Lex took a sip and casually put the glass down in front of him on the table. Clark bit back a grin.

“This is really serious for you? Believe me, I’m not trying to offend you again, Lex. I just want to make sure. You’re an experienced man und Clark is … well, 17.”

“I know, Sir. And I assure you that until some months ago it wasn’t anything but friendship. But even then, Clark was the most important person in my life. This couldn’t be more serious for me.”

Clark gave him a somewhat watery smile and Jonathan nodded. “I guess I’ve been an idiot for long enough, so I’m not going to start again. Just treat him well.”

“I will, Sir.”

“And don’t call me Sir or Mr. Kent. Jonathan will do fine.”

“And I’m Martha. Do you want to stay for dinner, Lex?” She smiled a little hesitantly. “I’m afraid it won’t be anything special, I didn’t know we’d have a guest. Just chicken with mashed potatoes and fried corn.”

Lex smiled at her and Clark could see the warmth behind it. It was not the open smile he reserved for Clark when they were alone, but it also wasn’t the mere polite smile he gave other people that never reached his eyes. Was it possible to love him even more? Yes, Clark decided, it obviously was.

“Clark has been gushing about your cooking ever since I’ve known him, Mrs. … Martha. I’d love to stay, thank you.”

She smiled happily and got up to get dinner started.

“Do you need help with the potatoes, mum?”

“Sure, if you don’t mind, honey.”

Clark noticed that Jonathan and Lex went to the living room and a little worried he used his strong hearing to make sure they wouldn’t fight again.

Clark heard how both men took a seat, then Jonathan spoke up. “I hope you don’t mind me asking. Are you sure this guy with the photos won’t make any trouble?”

“Absolutely.” He heard the smile in Lex’s voice. It was a good thing the knife he was peeling the potatoes with couldn’t hurt him. “You know I wasn’t kidding when I said the first thing he’s going to is buying new trousers.”

At this Jonathan burst out laughing and Lex joined him.

Clark stopped listening and concentrated on dinner, a big smile on his lips.

[darkdevasofdestruction]

Day 3 : Kiss - Ezio Auditore

“Come on, Kat, it’s gonna be fun, I promise!” Claudia whined, holding both of my hands, looking up at me with puppy eyes. “No, Claudia, it’s not gonna be fun. I don’t want to have a joint birthday party. I know your birthday is on January 2nd, and mine on the 3rd, but...But come on, I’m so used to people forgetting about my birthday, it’s not even fun anymore. I’m sure it’s just gonna be you who remembers, and the rest would just celebrate your birthday or something, so what’s the point?” I sigh, plopping on the bed, hanging my head in disappointment. “Hmm...Okay, how about this! Let’s make a party this weekend, now that December finally started and it was the 1st snow already? It’s just gonna be the two of us, Federico, Ezio and Petruccio, and my house. It’s family! And it’s gonna be okay to get drunk, nobody’s gonna judge, right? Federico and Ezio get drunk ALL the time and nobody bats an eye, and besides, Petruccio is finally 18 and he is legal to drink! So many great things happening this year!” the younger girl chirped in glee, making me groan and lay on the bed completely. “I don’t know what to say...Not my best year.” I smile sardonically, looking up at her. “Oh, fuck that, he was a shithead and you know it! Everybody knows it! He was nothing and WILL be nothing! You deserve a break from all this...This mess, okay? You deserve to be happy and have someone who loves you! And let me tell you, Ezio is head over heels with you! -...Wait...Shit, I shouldn’t have told you that...Urgh.” she facepalmed and started mildly panicking, before giggling awkwardly. “Ezio...The guy who sleeps around and stuff...? Who doesn’t flirt with me or shows even the smallest hint...? Likes me...? Spare me, Claudia. I know he’s your brother, but...Just because he’s your family, doesn’t make him right for me.” I shake my head, getting up, ready to leave the room, but she stops me. “Wait, no, don’t go, please! Look, this was supposed to be a secret, okay? Ezio has been into you since you started hanging out with me and I kept telling you how nice you are, showed him your Facebook and Instagram, would sometimes show him our snaps and so on...I overheard him asking Federico for advice 2 years ago. It’s just...He’s trying to learn more about you so you won’t dislike him, but he’s very shy about actually being himself around you. And he hasn’t been whoring around, actually. So, uhm...If you decide to come over...The party is this Saturday, bring sweets, please. I’ll make sure to make your favourite shots.” she explaiend before letting go of my arm, letting me go home, able to overthink all my life choices.

Should I go? I mean...Ezio IS a lovely person, or at least, that’s what I could see. But so were my Ex’s, at the beginning, and it was all a facade, making everything go down in the flames of hell.

Why must decisions be so complicated?

-----

I get over my shyness and go buy some cookies from the bakery and make my way over to the Auditore Villa, where I had to stay for about 5 minutes in front of the door to convince myself to go for it... So I put my hand on the handle and get in, being greeted by the beautiful smell of Italian cuisine, namely, Pizza.

I go in the kitchen slowly, feeling not very welcomed, but I see the Auditores drinking wine together waiting for the Pizza to get cooked.  They all looked so merry and cheerful together...What the hell was I even doing here, intruding in a family party? What an idiot...

I turned around to slowly make my presence unobserved, but that couldn’t happen because Ezio raised from the table in shock, saying my name a little louder than preferable, making everyone’s attention focus on me.

“Katrina, cara mia, what are you doing here?” Ezio asked, making his way to me. “Uhm...I brought cookies?” I said unsure of myself, looking away. “I asked her to come for our party! I bet you’re happy I did, right, guys?!” she grinned at us, but I could only shoot her a very poisonous glare. “Si, of course we are happy Kat is here! The room suddenly became much brighter!” Ezio cheered, bringing me to the table, letting me sit between me and Claudia. “Uh...Right...Whatever you say.” I mutter, putting the bag of cookies on the table and biting my lip at how awkward I felt, not exactly knowing what to say or do. “Aww, Kat, I’m so happy you are here! Hey, Federico, make the B52 shots, Kat is here so we can celebrate and do party games!” Claudia cheered, making me sweatdrop. “Food first, then alcohol. You’ll just end up sick and with a nasty hangover.” I shrug, trying to look out for her. “Experience?” Petruccio asked in a shy voice. “Yes. Others’ experience. Makes for a ton of entertaining material, if you ask me.” I chuckle softly, only able to gaze in Claudia’s direction. “And what great timing, the pizza’s ready!” Federico chuckled already putting the pizza on the table - One pizza for him, one for Claudia and Petruccio...And one for me and Ezio. Am I reading too much into it, or is there a conspiracy theory going on here? “Ezio did these. He’s the best at making pizza out of everyone here.” Claudia winked, making me roll my eyes in annoyance. “Sure, but I’m the best at Pasta, you can’t deny that.” Federico chuckled, making Ezio laugh.  “Well...Guess Claudia was right. You did a nice job with this.” I admitted in shock at how great it was, especially compared to the ones at pizzerias or restaurants. “100% Italian quality right here, baby!” he fist pumped, making me let out an amused breath. “Bring the shots! Shot! Shot! Shot! Shot!” Claudia chants, getting joined by Petruccio, while I looked at her with amusement, one of my eyebrows raised in confusion. “Someone’s rather enthusiastic to get drunk. But fine, be that way.”

We went to the living-room, on the carpet, waiting in a circle for Federico to come with the chocolate shots already so we can play our party games, which was basically Truth or Dare for the most part, but we were so lazy or tipsy from the high intake of alcohol (SOME of us) that we preferred to just play Truth or Truth, so we won’t have to get up.

It seems though that Claudia and Petruccio couldn’t hold their liqueur at all, so they became sick and had to go to the bathroom and puke, while Federico, despite being close to drunk himself, had to go take care of them, while I remained wobbly, humming to myself some random songs that came into my mind while cleaning up some of the mess that we made, only to notice that Ezio remained behind as well.

“What are you singing, bella?” he asked randomly, making me turn around at him in slight confusion. “Uh...Just some Christmas songs, I guess. My friends keep singing them, you hear them on the radio too...Kinda got them stuck in mind head, I s’ppose.” I shrug, looking away from him, busying myself as a way to not look rude. “May I ask you something, Kat?” Ezio asks, getting in front of me and resting his arm on the table, looking straight at me. “Uhm...What is it?” I mutter, feeling awkward as hell. “Have you been avoiding me? Have I done something that annoyed you so much that you act so cold with me?” he asked with the most serious, yet puppy looking face I’ve ever seen on him. “I-I didnt avoid you, okay? And if I did, I didn’t mean to. I’m sorry.” I tried to reason with him, but he only shook his head and sighed. “I may be tipsy, but I’m not stupid, Kat. If something that I’m doing is bothering you, then I’d like you to tell me so I can stop, okay?” Ezio pressed the subject, making me rake my fingers through my hair. “Okay, fine, look...I will be straight with you, I guess. I’ve been pondering a lot of things this week and...My head hurts like hell because of it, I have to admit. Claudia invited me to this party just before she let it slip that you have a crush on me or something and since Monday I’ve been trying to sort out my feelings and judgement, and honestly, I don’t know what to say or do. So yeah, sorry for being cold and distant, it wasn’t on purpose or anything, I have nothing against you.” I bit my lip in annoyance, not really up for a heart-to-heart conversation with a person that makes my heart feel like it has a panic attack. “Claudia told me about what happened with those jerks in the past. I can only imagine how bad it would be for you and I can only imagine how bad it must have hurt you that it made you not believe in true love anymore. Before she told me about it, I wanted to try my chance and ask you out very soon, but what chance do I have with someone like you?” he chuckled as his cheeks got faintly pinker. “Uhm...Shouldn’t it be the other way around?” I snorted in mock-amusement, but it made him shake his head vehemently, gripping my shoulders. “You, cara mia, are an amazing person, okay? Beautiful, smart, talented, funny, kind? Literally so perfect? And I’m what? A guy with a pretty face, fabulous hair and a bad reputation.” he shrugged dramatically, making me stifle my laugh. “I don’t know, Ezio, the last guy told me he dated me out of pity. I’m not sure where my self-esteem lies anymore, you feel me?” I give him a self-deprecating half-smile, but it only caused his expression to change from dramatic to offended. “Oddio santo, if I ever see that guy, he’s dead. How dare he treat such a beautiful soul like that? If anything else, you were with him out of pity!” he spoke out, shaking his head. “To be fair...I never actually loved any of my ex’s. Is that sad? I don’t know. You think you like someone, but then you realise that you just made yourself like the person for the sake of a relationship and...When you get to the point when you just want to get the hell out of it, you realise that it was all for nothing. It’s pretty sad, y’know?” I confess, looking away, but from the corner of my eye I could see him nodding slightly. “I know I’m basically out of your league, but would you let me show you that true love exists? Would you allow me to help you believe in it again?” Ezio leans in closer to me, one of his hands on my face, caressing it gently, as I leaned into his touch by reflex, as he let out an amused, adoring breath. “I mean...What’s the worst thing that could happen anyways? It can’t get any worse than what I’ve already been through, so...Okay, Ezio, do your magic.” I smile timidly, looking away. “Trust me, mi fiore, I won’t make regret it.” he ushered as he cupped my face and leaned in, planting a long and loving kiss on my lips, as I could only put my hands on his chest, too out of it to know what to do. “W-Well...I’m pretty sure I won’t regret it.” I managed to say after a while. “Oh~? Did you like that, Kitten?” Ezio teased me, as I could only chuckle shyly, nudging him slightly. “Hey, I mean, compared to my first kiss, that was a tongue-forced one, in front of a public toilet...This was heavenly, okay?” I cover my mouth with my hand as I laugh at the stupid memory, only to have my hand snatched away and kissed by the Italian boy. “And it will only get better from here on. Also, I’m so happy Claudia told Federico about that shot mix, ‘cause chocolate tastes so good on your lips.” he smirks, but he wasn’t expecting me putting my hands on his neck to steal a quick kiss from him, leaving him stunned and blushing. “Awww, I guess I have competition, ‘cause you sure tasted so damn sweet too~.” I wink at him playfully before chuckling at how adorable he looked. “Ay ay ay, cara mia, you’re going to be the death of me.” was the last thing he could say before we went to check on the others, who apparently all fell asleep.

I suppose...Sometimes it’s nice to face your fears and be brave in your decision to take risks and have such a nice win.

And so much more free, 100% genuine Italian pizza!

[visander]

A Bit of Space (5/6)

Alec gets sick.

You can read this chapter on ao3 here or listen to a podfic version here. Special thanks to @accal1a for creating the podfic and @the-prophet-lemonade for beta reading this chapter.

Chapter Five:

Apollo had reappeared by the time they got sick. Magnus felt it first. He and Alec had been stretched out, talking aimlessly when Magnus felt something unsettling in his stomach for the first time. He didn’t say anything, brushing it off as hunger pains that had become normal when only eating the nutritional blocks they did. Then, it happened again and this time, Alec heard it. 

He looked over to Magnus and frowned. “Do you feel okay?” He asked, a slight panic in his voice. Magnus had gotten him to relax a little but all of a sudden, he looked like he was terrified Magnus was going to keel over and die. 

Magnus nodded. “Yeah, I’m fine.” He waved his hand in Alec’s direction, brushing off his concern. The truth was, he didn’t feel fine. He didn’t quite feel sick, but he felt… odd. He felt like he might get sick but that wasn’t enough to worry Alec about. 

It was only a few minutes later that Alec himself sat up. He stared into the distance, wide eyed, a different kind of panic showing on his face now. 

“Are you-“ Magnus began, but before he could finish his sentence, Alec was on his feet. He rushed through the crack in the door of their ship and disappeared outside.

Apollo bounded after him, clearly curious about where Alec was going so quick. Magnus followed after Apollo, stepping outside just in time to see Alec bend over and projectile vomit all over the ground. 

Magnus, in comparison to how Alec was reacting to the water, still felt great. He counted his blessings but kept that to himself. He didn’t think rubbing it in would make Alec feel any better. When Alec finally stopped puking, Magnus approached him slowly. He placed a hand gently on Alec’s back. “You okay?” 

“Yeah,” Alec grumbled, carefully straightening out, one hand pressed against the wall of the ship for balance. He looked decidedly not okay but Magnus didn’t point this out. He squinted at Magnus. “You don’t feel sick?” 

Magnus shrugged. “I felt… a little uneasy, but-“ He glanced at the mess on the ground, grimacing. “-not like that.” He frowned, looking back to Alec. “You feel better now?” 

Slowly, Alec nodded. “I think so.” He wasn’t actively throwing up anymore, but he still looked pale and queasy. 

“Come lay inside,” Magnus said, reaching for Alec’s hand. “You can use the empty bucket if you need to throw up again.”

For a moment, Alec looked like he was going to argue, but then his shoulders sagged and he simply nodded, his clammy hand clutching Magnus’ as he was led back inside. 

Magnus made Alec lay down. He put the bucket somewhere close and tried to persuade Alec to eat some food, so that there was something lining his stomach in case he threw up again. Magnus only wished he had fresh water to give him but that wasn’t going to happen. 

“It’s pay back,” Magnus murmured eventually. He’d settled on the floor next to Alec, pretending the small room didn’t smell of vomit, sweat and sickness. “You had to take care of me when we crashed. I have to take care of you now.” 

Alec’s eyes fluttered open. He looked over at Magnus blearily. “I can take care of myself,” he mumbled, sounding vaguely offended. “You don’t have to.” 

Magnus hummed as Alec’s eyes fell shut again. His breathing slowed and he drifted into sleep, only to groan a few minutes later, roll over and heave into the bucket. 

Magnus grabbed the bucket when he was done and he went to dump the contents outside. Alec was too tired to protest.

Alec was sick for nearly five days. Magnus was worried about him, but he was also reassured by the fact that Magnus himself felt fine. Well, fine-ish. Whatever was affecting Alec so strongly had only mildly upset Magnus’ stomach, which was good news. If something in the water was toxic to them, Magnus’ body would be reacting just as strongly.

Still, Alec didn’t seem too comforted to hear that. 

Magnus didn’t blame him. He would be grumpy if he was throwing up for five days straight too. The first day, Alec wanted to be left alone. He seemed like he was trying to spare Magnus from taking care of him, even though he could barely sit up by himself without vomiting. The second day, Magnus sat by Alec’s head and ran his fingers through Alec’s hair as he slept. When Alec woke up, Magnus didn’t stop and Alec didn’t complain. 

The third day, Alec had leaned back into Magnus’ chest and let Magnus hold him. The fourth day, they had laid tangled in each other for hours, any hesitation on Alec’s part wiped away by the fact that he felt so sick and desperate for comfort. 

On the fifth day, Magnus decided to be bold. He moved to stand up and get them both something to drink. They had to reconcile that the water was making Alec sick but it wasn’t killing him like dehydration would, so Alec had to keep drinking it. When he pulled away, he was surprised to see Alec pout. 

It was an adorable expression on Alec’s normally very serious face and Magnus couldn’t help but lean it and kiss it. They hadn’t kissed since the first night, when they’d been rudely interrupted and they hadn’t talked about it either. Neither of them had said if they wanted it to be a trend that continued. 

Magnus pulled away, watching Alec’s face for any signs of discomfort or, worse, regret. This kiss was different from before. There was something domestic in kissing Alec while he was sick, something that made it clear Magnus was kissing him with no other ulterior motive in mind. Half of him was sure that this was the moment where Alec would tell him that it was too far. He was sure Alec was about to tell him that this wasn’t okay, that he had changed his mind, but Alec just smiled. 

Then, he spoke, “You have very bad timing. I probably taste terrible.” 

Magnus rolled his eyes but he smiled as he reached for the water. A lot more kisses came after that and it turns out that neither of them really minded. 

By the sixth day, Alec’s body seemed to have reached a tentative agreement with the water. He still felt ill, but he wasn’t throwing up every few minutes and dry heaving when there was nothing left. It was a drastic improvement. 

Magnus half-expected the kisses to stop now that Alec was on his feet and the haze of sickness had worn off, but they didn’t. Almost as soon as Alec was up and about again, he leaned in to kiss Magnus and then looked a little embarrassed after, as if he thought Magnus could possibly tell him no.

There was no universe in which Magnus would dislike Alec kissing him. After that, it was just a thing. Their thing. They kissed a lot. Kisses, touches, heated looks. Magnus wasn’t sure if they were together or if something like that even mattered when they were the only two people on the entire planet, but they kissed a lot and at night, they curled up in each other’s arms. Sometimes, they held hands like they were far younger than they really were. 

Magnus had never had this type of romance before. The only person he had ever seriously dated was Camille, and she vehemently did not like hand holding or cuddling. In fact, she didn’t like affection at all but Alec seemed to love it, even if he blushed every time Magnus reached out to grab his hand and reel him close. 

Magnus didn’t think Alec had ever had this kind of romance either. Alec had mentioned that he had once been engaged, but he hadn’t seemed too enthusiastic about that fact. He had admitted that he’d never let himself kiss a man before. Maybe that was what made this work for him; it was new, it was exciting and there was no better place to let go of your fear of rejection than in space, alone with one man who was more than willing to accept whatever Alec had to offer. 

Still, Magnus hoped he was more to Alec than just something to pass the time, someone to experiment with. He hoped that, even if they’d still been on Earth, Alec would have liked him. He hoped that Alec meant it when he said he’d have accepted his proposal of a date. 

Magnus liked to pretend he believed that was true. There was no use dwelling on ifs and maybes. They were here. They were not home and if being here made Alec like Magnus, then Magnus wasn’t going to complain or bother asking useless questions to make himself feel better. 

They were here and they had each other. That had to be enough. 

Once Alec was well again, he threw himself into trying to fix the ship. Magnus had assumed that they had both given up trying, but apparently Alec had not. In Magnus’ head, he had imagined nursing Alec back to health for them to spend all their time curled together, making out and adventuring back to the lake to collect water, if only to survive one more day. 

Apparently, Alec had imagined Magnus nursing him back to health so that Alec could then spend all his time fiddling with solar panels and flicking through books he’d already read ten times. Every once in a while, he would look up and spare Magnus a glance, sometimes a kiss, before he was back to focusing on a bunch of inanimate wires. 

Magnus admired Alec’s endless determination but, really, if there was any time to relax and enjoy some time off, it was now. They were quite literally the only people on this planet and nobody knew they were here. They hadn’t died from the crash, from the atmosphere, or from the water. They deserved some time to enjoy themselves and yet, Alec had found something besides Magnus to occupy himself with, something that very much resembled work.

Magnus tried to be supportive. When Alec thought he was on to something, Magnus would nod in agreement. When Alec said he was sure their solar panels weren’t completely broken, Magnus tried not to complain as Alec spent the rest of the day toying with them and hardly looking up. 

At least Apollo still liked spending time with Magnus but even then, Magnus’ alien friend seemed to be growing older and more independent before Magnus’ eyes. It had gotten bigger since they had found it. Magnus could see the gray around its eyes turning into a light blue. It still seemed to adore Magnus but more recently, it kept its distance.

Apollo spent more and more time away from the ship, only coming back at night to curl into Magnus’ side and then disappear early sometime in the morning. Magnus was being neglected and that feeling was only amplified by the fact that Magnus was slowly going out of his mind with nothing to do. 

Alec busied himself with the ruins of their ship. Apollo adventured out into the undergrowth every day and Magnus had nothing to do. He had filled his notebooks with sketches of Apollo. He’d reorganized all their supplies and read every training manual onboard from back to front. Alec said he could help him with repairs if he wanted, but Magnus declined the offer. 

Sure, it would be nice if their ship had power, but it was a long shot that Magnus had given up on a while ago. For all intents and purposes, they were offline and Magnus imagined they would stay that way.

That’s why he had Alec repeat himself one morning when Alec woke Magnus from his half-asleep haze by saying something incomprehensible.

“It worked,” Alec repeated, as Magnus stared blankly at him. 

Alec looked over to Magnus. Magnus wasn’t sure what he expected to see on Alec’s face, but the blank shock he saw there did nothing to illuminate what Alec meant. Slowly, Alec leaned back. He pointed to the control panel that had been dark since they’d crashed and there, Magnus saw one lone, red light. 

It was lit.  

Magnus jumped out of his seat, scrambling over to Alec. His eyes scanned the rest of the dark console, asking, “Can we use the radio?” 

Alec shook his head slowly. “There’s not enough power to do anything, but I thought, maybe, I could at least get one of the solar panels working. So, I went and set one outside and plugged it in to see if anything would happen and-” Alec trailed off but Magnus didn’t need him to explain any further. 

“And it worked,” Magnus stated, his eyes wide. Some part of him still didn’t realize what that meant. They could fix the rest of their solar panels. They could get their ship back online. They could call someone-

Magnus’ thoughts reared to a stop. He recalled the thick clouds he’d seen circling the planet before they crashed. They could try to call someone, but there was no guarantee that the signal would make it through the atmosphere without getting scrambled. Magnus shook his head, trying not to think about it. The most important thing was that they’d have power. That was enough. It had to be.

They would have access to the ship's offline database. That included research databases, video files and all the letters that Ragnor had ever sent him. They’d have movies too, unless the crash had wiped the hard drives of everything fun. If that was the case, Magnus was going to have some strong words with whoever had designed the emergency systems. 

Strong words in his head, of course. Maybe he’d write them down in one of his journals on the off-chance someone would find them. His angry letter could be read aloud a hundred years in the future to some poor man’s great grandchildren and they’d know Magnus had been furious that he hadn’t been able to watch his crappy sitcoms. 

“I didn’t think you’d get them working,” Magnus said finally. There was a part of him that felt guilty for writing off what he thought was a useless endeavour. Clearly, Alec had never been wasting his time.

When Alec turned to him, he didn’t look upset or offended. Instead, he was grinning. “I know,” Alec said and his tone made Magnus roll his eyes. He didn’t need to sound that smug about it. “So, are you going to help set up the other ones or are you going to make me do that myself too?” Alec asked finally, his grin no less prominent. 

Magnus glared at him before sighing dramatically. “Yes, I’ll help you, but only because I don’t want you to complain too much about having to do it yourself.” Magnus moved forward to peer over the table at what Alec had set up.

“I didn’t complain about having to do this one alone,” Alec pointed out, though he was still smirking. 

“I know you were desperate for my help the whole time.” Magnus waved his hand dismissively in Alec’s direction. “You don’t have to say it.” 

“I think I managed pretty well-” 

“You don't have to say it! I’ll help!” Magnus reached for a wire that was thrown across the table and glanced down at the charts Alec had been using. Some of them, Alec had written on, scribbling notes and calculations in the margins but it didn’t matter much to Magnus - who had no clue what he was looking at. “So… what do I need to do?” He asked, waving his wire in question. 

Alec huffed out a laugh. “Sit down, I’ll show you.” 

Magnus sat, drawing the charts towards him with a frown. He only had a moment to look across them before Apollo came bounding into the ship. It catapulted itself onto the table, excited to see what they were doing. It had done the same thing to Alec countless times but this time, the paperwork went flying. Apparently, Apollo was eager to help as well. 

“This isn’t that hard,” Magnus announced, a couple of hours later. He had put together a total of one solar panel. He’d been excited to set it up outside but Alec said that they should finish repairing all the panels first, before figuring out where they were going to position them. That made sense but Magnus, in his excitement to actually be working on something that mattered again, had still been disappointed. 

“It’s easy because I already figured out how to fix them,” Alec murmured. 

Magnus scoffed. “That’s a technicality. I helped you figure it out. I was sending you very motivational vibes the whole time.” 

Alec hummed softly. “Oh yeah, it really helped me power through every time you tried to crawl onto my lap. When you started kissing my neck and telling me to stop ‘working on something so boring’ and pay attention to you-” 

“I’ve never seen you work harder than after I did that.” 

Alec’s lips quirked. “Well, I was working on something but it wasn’t the solar panels.” 

Magnus looked up at Alec, a little surprised, before he burst into laughter. Alec had been growing more and more comfortable and confident, the longer they had been together and the closer they got. Magnus was learning that he liked this new Alec who was assured enough to make jokes about their new-found sex life. 

Magnus also learned that Alec’s confidence didn’t just extend to his words. He learned that Alec could hold him up with one hand and not even break a sweat while doing so.

That was a rather delightful discovery. 

 Magnus knew that the solar panels needed to charge and wouldn’t just instantly power on the ship but he’d still found himself disappointed when they finished setting them up and nothing happened. For all their hard work, it had been a bit anticlimactic. Alec said that it would take a while before they harvested enough energy to be useful. He wasn’t quite sure how much power they needed to test the radio or even just start up the ship but it wouldn’t be in the next few hours regardless.

Alec seemed like he couldn’t care less that they had to wait and see if they would suddenly regain contact with the real world. He didn’t seem to care that soon, their whole situation could change. He didn’t seem to care that they might not die here with no one knowing they had survived at all. 

Instead, Alec looked happy to have nothing to do but wait, as if his shoulders felt lighter and he could finally relax. Magnus, on the other hand, could not relax. He could barely sit still. How could he when all he could think about was the fact that they could be rescued? He could call Ragnor and Catarina and hear their voices. He could see his cat again. 

Of course, there was a chance the radio wouldn’t work. Magnus knew that. There were a lot of things that could go wrong. Even if they made contact, it would be a while before anyone could get out to them and anything could go wrong in the meantime but it was hard not to cling to thoughts of what could be possible now. 

Except, apparently, Alec didn’t find it too hard. He was laying sprawled across the couch with his feet propped up and his hands settled comfortably behind his head. His eyes were closed, frown lines gone from his forehead, while Magnus himself was standing, pacing back and forth across the room.

Alec opened one eye. “Would you like to do something?” he asked, causing Magnus to look over and glare. He spoke to Magnus like he was an energetic child who needed to get outside. True, it was how Magnus felt, but he was still offended. 

“What are you proposing?” Magnus scowled, choosing to ignore the smirk that had appeared on Alec’s face. 

“Let’s go swimming.” 

Magnus laughed dryly. He assumed Alec was kidding or mocking him, but when he looked over, Alec had sat up. Magnus blinked at him and stopped moving. “You’re not kidding?”

Alec shrugged. “No, I guess not,” he said. “You’ve stepped in the water more than once. I fell in halfway the last time we went to go get water and nothing happened.” He looked up at Magnus, his smirk now gone, his expression serious and thoughtful. “You’re completely healed and we’re drinking the water. Swimming in it can’t be any worse and the water is so clear.”

Alec frowned, still speaking almost to himself. “I think we’d see anything if it came close to us and if there was any harmful bacteria or anything, well-” Alec shrugged again, but it seemed stiff. “I think we’d know by now.” Alec looked up at him for a second before he continued, “We also could use the excuse to clean up.”

Magnus thought about it for a second before he nodded slowly. Alec was the more cautious one. If Alec didn’t think swimming was too dangerous, Magnus wasn’t going to correct him. He made a fair point about cleaning up too. They tried to stay clean but it was hard. They hadn’t managed to get completely clean since they’d been here and Magnus knew they both smelled like it. “It really can’t be more dangerous than drinking it,” he agreed finally. Slowly, a smile stretched across Magnus’ face. “So… are we going swimming?”

Alec still looked a little unsure, as if he was rethinking it but after a moment, he nodded. “Yeah,” he said, sounding more confident than he looked. “We are.” 

Magnus grinned even wider. “If I had known, I’d have packed a bathing suit.” 

Behind him, Alec laughed. It was a sound that Magnus had grown to love far too quickly.

In lieu of a bathing suit, Magnus found himself pulling out the shorts he normally slept in and tying them tight around his hips. He skipped a shirt and went bare chested, a fact that Alec seemed endlessly distracted by. The first few times they had ventured to the lake, they’d been so careful not to touch anything but Magnus had touched it all enough that they both could assume they were in the clear. 

Still, Alec didn’t seem inclined to share his body with Magnus, even though Magnus had seen it countless times by now. He chose a dark shirt that he normally wore under his uniform and pants Magnus had to convince him to take off when they got there. He could not go swimming in pants. Magnus would not allow it.

He fought Magnus on it the whole way there, insisting that he could, but when they actually reached the waterfront, Alec stripped out of his pants easily enough and stood there in just his underwear. He turned away from Magnus, blushing softly and seeming rather embarrassed. Magnus wasn’t sure what was different about getting undressed now compared to when they were making out but apparently, it was different. When Magnus encouraged him with a few pointed looks, he finally took his shirt off as well and when he saw the appreciation in Magnus’ eyes, he seemed to relax somewhat. 

Magnus wanted to push Alec into the water right then and there. The only thing better than Alec’s bare chest would be Alec’s bare chest wet with beads of water running down his sternum, getting caught in the hair he didn’t have a razor to shave anymore. He was embarrassed by it, Magnus already knew. Alec had admitted it one of the first times they slept together, when Magnus had run his fingers through it and Alec had flushed. He’d promised Magnus he was better at shaving it on Earth, with the proper supplies, but Magnus didn’t have a thing to complain about. He loved Alec’s body hair and he was determined to show Alec that he meant it when he said it. 

Alec turned to look out across the water, his eyes finally leaving Magnus. He looked reflective and Magnus wondered what he was thinking about but instead of waiting to let Alec speak, he moved behind him, touching his back softly. 

Alec leant back into Magnus’ chest, clearly expecting Magnus’ arms to wrap around him from behind. Maybe, he thought Magnus was about to give him a kiss but instead, Magnus planted both his palms on Alec’s back and pushed him, hard. 

Alec stumbled forward and fell right into the water, disappearing under the blue surface. His face reemerged a moment later, sputtering. “Magnus! Why’d you do that?” He spat out.  

Magnus stared down at him, putting to memory the sight of Alec glistening in the sunlight. What he wouldn’t have given for his camera to be able to take a picture of this moment, so he could look at it later.

Magnus smiled at the thought. If he had his way, the very first photo ever published of this planet would feature Alec, front and center, half-naked, bathed in sunlight and beautiful. That was, assuming the photos ever made it back to Earth in the first place. “I wanted to see you all wet,” he said to Alec, his smile growing. “I’m not disappointed by the sight.”

Alec scoffed and lunged forward without a moment of hesitation. He caught Magnus by his waist and yanked him down. Before Magnus could try to push him away, they were both underwater. Magnus clung to Alec, a flash of fear jolting through him as the surface disappeared.

They broke the surface of the water a second later and Alec’s arms held Magnus tight against his chest. He laughed, but as Magnus coughed and tightened his grip on Alec’s shoulders, Alec’s expression sobered. He looked up at Magnus, water trickling off his eyelashes. “Magnus? You okay? What happened?” 

Magnus took a deep breath, knotting his hands around the back of Alec’s neck and drawing himself closer. “I just don’t like water that much,” he forced out finally. “I’ve always been a little scared of it.” He admitted. 

Alec blinked at him. “Why’d you agree to go swimming then?”

Magnus frowned. “I wanted to see you all wet,” he repeated. 

The downturn of Alec’s mouth broke into a dumbfounded smile. “Magnus,” he whispered, “Do you want to get out?” 

Magnus shook his head no. No longer submerged, wrapped in Alec’s arms, it didn’t seem as scary. “But I think I’d feel much better if you kissed me,” he countered.

Much to Magnus’ delight, Alec was more than willing to oblige him.

Continue to Chapter Six - Masterpost.

[jadewing-realms]

“...it can’t get any worse.”

Fictober 2018 - Day 29

Out of the entire population of the known world—or maybe even the unknown—Hoshigaki Kisame is the very last person anyone should be asking to take care of a child.

At least, that’s his opinion. He dislikes kids. Not ‘hate,’ mind you. He doesn’t hate them. Dislikes them. For many reasons. And none of those reasons are why he thinks most would want to keep children as far from him as possible. Sure, they’re needy, emotional, selfish, nosy, stupid and naive, but that has virtually nothing on the fact that he’s the Blue Beast. The terror of 14 prefectures, known by his work in multiple countries, valued at several millions in bounties, with a flawless hit record and a taste for prey that he can play with first.

He’s worked very hard for this reputation, so why the h*** did Shimura Danzo contact him for this job? It makes absolutely no sense.

Not that he can say no, exactly, not with the pay grade he’s offering, but still… He’s barely even been given anything to work with; something about the National Hero Commission trying to keep the lowest of profiles… And he guesses that, as a fugitive of the law himself, he can understand this.

It’s even mildly amusing that the enforcers of the law are now trying to dodge it. Ah, espionage. If he wasn’t in the hired gun business, that’s probably where he’d be. Much more fun than boring old criminal justice.

His knee is just starting to bounce again when he, at long last, hears the train. It’s close now. Took it long enough; it’s twenty minutes late. And thanks to the delay, the platform is filling up more than he’s really comfortable with. Not that it’s a terribly dangerous place for him to be… Laamu is a pretty remote little town. It’s more of a waystation for trains than anything else. Probably why Shimura picked it as the rendezvous point. The likelihood of anybody recognizing him here is fairly low, all things considered… Still. He wore long sleeves and jeans without holes for today. His complexion is rather… distinct.

The train pulls in with the ease of a greased pump, whipping air and fallen leaves off the tracks into the faces of anyone stupid enough to stand too close to the edge. Kisame remains seated where he is, on one of the benches against the wall, as far from the edge of the platform as he can get. He takes his work seriously; no unnecessary risks. He watches the windows on each car get steadily slower until they at last come to a stop, with Car 7 stopping directly in front of him, just as planned.

It’s nice when things go according to plan.

He pulls his phone from the pocket of his hooded jacket and pulls up the specified informant’s photo again. He’s a bit of a plain-looking guy… brown hair, round eyes. Should be easy enough to spot.

Movies always portray secret agents running around in suits all the time. Psh. How ridiculous. No, Kisame will be looking for average street clothes, something that blends into everybody else. The key will be the hair. And the kid.

Now he waits for them to find him.

Only a few people get off at this stop, but they disappear immediately into the crowd waiting to board. Kisame sweeps his gaze over them all, searching for heads fighting the flow. It’s eight in the morning, and anybody with anywhere to be is on their way out. And since nobody in this dinky little town has gone anywhere yet, it’s understandable that nobody’s on their way back yet.

Ah. There they are.

The informant dude is dressed in an outdated band tee and denim jacket (like, actual denim), darker jeans, and Nikes. A weighty backpack is slung over one shoulder, and he lugs a single, small suitcase behind him. Trailing just behind that, a tiny kid dressed in black follows with his head down and hood up, hands stuffed away in his pockets. Black shoes, black jeans, black hoodie, and the sneaking wisps of black hair peeking out from under the black shadows under the hood.

Great. An emo punk.

Kisame doesn’t stand. Not yet. Only waits.

The informant, who matches the photo more the closer he gets, doesn’t look straight at him, and makes sure to take a wandering beeline across the platform before at last, he arrives close to the bench on which Kisame sits, and pauses to pull out his phone. To anyone else, he looks like he’s simply checking messages or perhaps looking up directions. The kid lingers behind him, still not raising his head. He’s probably been told to keep it down until they’re at the appropriate location—in this case, the safehouse thirty minutes outside of town.

Then the informant meets Kisame’s gaze, jerks his head in gesture, and then heads off toward the exit. The kid follows dutifully. Kisame waits exactly twelve seconds, gets up, stretches, and then follows.

Once in the parking lot, the informant wordlessly allows Kisame to overtake them so he can lead them to his Jeep, which is parked a fair distance from the main entrance. He hops in the front seat and starts her up as the informant and the kid climb into the passenger and back seats respectively. Kisame doesn’t bother waiting to hear the click of seatbelts before he’s pulling out and making for the highway.

The little town of Laamu takes no less than five minutes to cross, with zero traffic, zero lights, and only one stop sign at a major intersection. Once the quaint neighborhood streets fall behind them, the open countryside swallows them up in little woods and rice paddies.

Then and only then does the informant speak.

“You know where you’re headed?” he asks, in a voice that’s softer than Kisame expected it would be. Then again, it matches those wide, almost-innocent eyes.

Kisame snorts. “Never been to the area… I took a little drive around before heading to the station. Scoped things out.”

“It’s a nice place,” the informant hums, gazing out the window. “Quiet, unassuming… Nobody gives you any trouble in places like these.”

“Unless your dog gets into your neighbor’s flowers, nope, not at all.” Kisame shifts his gaze from the road briefly to shoot the man a wary glance. He understands the concept of protocol… but he can cut the crap now. No need for double entendres; it’s not like his car is bugged or anything.

He checks. Every day.

“You gonna debrief me or what?” Kisame just goes for it. No use beating around the bush.

The informant sighs a little. “…Yes. I brought a file for you to look over when we get to the safehouse.”

“We have half an hour; anything you can’t just tell me on the way?”

The informant is somewhat hesitant—why, Kisame can’t begin to guess. They’re hiring him for this job, they’d better be good and prepared to give him every detail he asks for. He doesn’t go into jobs half blind. It increases risk, it’s bad for business and frankly, it’s just plain stupid.

Thankfully, the informant does start talking, sparingly. He tells Kisame about a group of vigilante hackers called Heaven’s Eye, which had apparently been a thorn in poor old Shimura Danzo’s side for quite some time, breaking into secure networks, stealing compromising information about Pro-Heroes and releasing it to the public.

Apparently, they got their hands on some pretty shady stuff, including operations of the National Hero Commission itself, matters of national security, and nobody knows what else. The informant says the commission fears for more sensitive information was accessed—like nuclear launch codes and the like.

Between this information and the occasional pause to give Kisame passenger-side directions, it takes the informant the whole trip to get to this point. They turn off the main roads and cross the last stretch of minimum maintenance, which doubles as the cabin’s driveway, until said cabin comes into view. It’s an old, single-story thing with missing shingles and weathered siding, a sagging porch. Small, unassuming… just like Laamu. A perfect hideaway.

As Kisame’s pulling up to the front and shutting off the engine, the informant lowers his voice to finish the backstory.

“I’m not authorized to go into details, but a third party hired someone to put the group’s leader and several officers down for good.” The informant keeps his gaze steady, but Kisame doesn’t miss the twitch of his eyes—like he starts to glance at the rearview mirror and stops himself a split-second in.

Kisame glances back. Frowns. Looks at the informant. “The kid?”

The informant just gets out of the car in response. Kisame looks back again, but the child is following suit of his guardian—or at least, his guardian until the day’s over.

This certainly wasn’t what Kisame expected.

After the other two, he gets out, the Jeep leaping once rid of his bulk, making the kid at the back of the car suck in a breath in surprise as the informant fishes his suitcase out of the trunk. Kisame snickers.

“I take it the rest I have to—” he starts to say as he rounds to the back, ready to receive the briefing file at long last.

He’s not ready for the kid to lower himself into a bow, to him, and speak in a level, eloquent voice that’s not at all the punkish grumble he imagined it would be.

“I’m sorry for my rudeness,” he says, small voice bouncing off the ground on its way to Kisame’s ears. “I was told not to draw attention until we reached our destination, so I refrained from introducing myself. My name is Uchiha Itachi. It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance.”

‘Rudeness’? ‘It’s a pleasure’? Kisame stares, flabbergasted. “What the h***, kid… Did they tell you who I am?”

It’s halfway to rhetorical; only halfway. Given this strange cordiality, Kisame has his doubts. Can he even remember the last time somebody claimed it was a pleasure to meet him? Somebody he didn’t proceed to kill in their sleep shortly after?

“Indeed,” the child—child??—replies calmly, rising to fix Kisame with the biggest black eyes he’s ever seen. The kid looks like a doll. All eyelashes and pale round cheeks. “I’m told you’re a very capable mercenary.”

Kisame tears his attention away from the oddity before him just to glare at the informant (who, to his credit, seems unfazed). “Oh, so he gets all the info ahead of time.”

The informant just shrugs and starts rummaging around in his backpack. Before Kisame can say anything further, he speaks without looking up. “Uchiha-kun, why don’t you take your bag inside?”

It’s a patronizing dismissal, pitched in stark contrast to the maturity that had just spewed forth from this tiny pre-teen’s mouth—and he really is tiny. Uchiha Itachi barely surpasses Kisame’s waist.

Despite this treatment, Itachi nods to the informant and gathers up his suitcase. “Yes, sir,” he says, before marching off to do as he’s told.

Kisame watches him go, puzzling over how on earth such a polite little hellion can exist on this planet. Kids are supposed to be terrors… or so he’s gleaned from his experience.

“Is there something wrong with him?” he blurts, the first explanation to come to the forefront of his mind. In hindsight, it’s probably highly unfair and rude of him to assume this, but he’s never claimed to be an upstanding guy. Which is precisely why he’s confused.

The informant shoots him a stink eye before he whips a manila folder out of his bag and holds it out for Kisame to take. It’s stuffed full of neatly stacked papers, thickened with several paper clips in their midst. As Kisame receives it and begins leafing through, the informant gives him his answer.

“No. His family is very conservative. He’s been raised well.” The informant sets his backpack beside the Jeep’s rear wheel. “The only thing that could be considered ‘wrong’ with him is—”

“Hold up, hold up.” Kisame pauses in his skim of the first page—a profile of the kid who just went inside. “This kid’s an agent?”

The informant stutters into an exasperated sigh, but shakes his head. “It was an honorary induction, for the purpose of his assignment—of which he only had one.”

“The hit,” Kisame concludes, eyes darting further down the page in search of answers.

“Yes.”

“It says he—S***, he killed twelve people? Daddy included?? D***.” Kisame taps the page appreciatively. “Shimura doesn’t play around.”

“Officially,” the informant says sternly, “neither the commissioners or the NHC have anything to do with the incident. We’d like to keep it that way.”

“Duh, that’s why you’re saddling him on me.” Kisame waves him off, too busy drowning in new intel to really care. Because if this kid is really only thirteen, as his profile claims, and he really just killed twelve people in cold blood on orders from Above, then— “So he’s either a psychopath or I’m gonna have to deal with some post-traumatic s***?”

The informant doesn’t look pleased with this summary, but both of them know he can’t dispute it. He’s not wrong. “We couldn’t exactly take him to see a professional after the mission was complete. But yes, the latter is very likely. We don’t expect you to be his shrink, but we figured you might have some experience dealing with a maiden kill and its fallout.”

Okay, the informant’s not wrong either.

This really is turning into a bit of a pain… Kisame doesn’t do comfort. He doesn’t do… nurturing, reassurance, that sort of crap. He’s no good at it, and has no interest in becoming good at it. It’s not necessary for his line of work, so why should he? But apparently, it’s being demanded of him now…

Granted, there’s no way they can enforce that will happen. If the kid turns into some mentally screwed up mess because his government used him and then dumped him in a wanted man’s lap, that’s not his problem. As long as he gets his money every month, as promised.

“He’s a good kid,” the informant insists, as if Kisame asked or something. “He’s young. He needs some kind of guidance. Stability, until things can settle down. This is far from ideal, we’re well aware, but we don’t have much going for options at this point. There’s not a lot for childcare in the underworld. You were the closest person we could find who’s done jobs for us before, relatively cooperative, mostly mentally sound, and not officially labeled as a Villain in the books.”

“Yeah,” Kisame snorts, “so you repay my good service by creating a child murderer and depositing his scrawny traumatized a** on me. You and I both know I’m not exactly qualified for this. I’m not a babysitter.”

The informant’s dark eyes narrow. “Don’t forget, we’re paying you good money to handle this.”

“How could I forget? That’s all I get outta this arrangement.”

That seems to be the end of that, because the informant rolls his eyes heavenward and scoops up his deposited backpack. He slings it over his shoulder and starts walking toward the driveway. “Read the file. We expect a regular check-in on the third of every month. Wi-fi password’s clipped to the photograph.”

Had to get the last word in, eh? Kisame heaves a dramatic sigh in accordance with the government’s dramatic antics and just gives the informant a lazy salute. He’ll figure out whatever else he needs to know from the file, he knows that. And what he can’t find there is bound to be within easy reach from the government-issued computer system inside. Shimura Danzo is nothing if not thorough.

Still. Kisame flips to Itachi’s profile again, glancing over the paragraphs of summary info before settling on the photograph of the kid. Instinctively, he looks up to the cabin, only to find that same kid standing on the porch, just outside the door. With his hands clasped in front of him and the morning sun creeping over the surrounding woods and distant mountain peaks… it’s like a shot from a movie.

Kisame groans to himself and snaps the folder shut. “No sweat, Hoshigaki… you’re just stuck alone on a mountain with a ridiculously pretentious teenager who just murdered his father and eleven other people, and you’re being paid a fortune in compensation and hush money to take care of him until he’s old enough to graduate… from the schooling you have to give him, even though you dropped out of high school, all because everybody in the country would recognize his face now.”

He pinches the bridge of his nose, where a headache is beginning to throb. “Right… At least it can’t get any worse.”

[calleo-bricriu]

Later.

(( Continued from conversation here. @absintheabsence ))

“I would tell you about the day I had, but you’re already well aware.” Excellent greeting, that. Calleo would get to it eventually, if he remembered, if nothing else. He set an oddly ornate, dark looking bottle on the desk; at first glance, it wasn’t clear whether the glass was dark or the liquid inside was dark, though it probably didn’t matter all that much.

“So, the entire fiasco with my office’s security,” Calleo turned around and leaned back against the old, probably not meant to be leaned upon desk and folded his arms across his chest, “When I started there in ‘83, there weren’t any. The whole place was just--open. Nothing shielded, nothing warded, nothing locked, the only security was that broken lift that didn’t always end up on the right floor. Aside from that, nothing.”

“It didn’t really matter, according to the department head, because nobody ever really liked coming down there anyway,” Calleo huffed, “but really, that’s only because everything was just--everywhere, it was an entire department stacked wall to ceiling across several levels of mostly things crawling with dark magic. Of course nobody ever visited the department, let alone tended to stay employed there for longer than three or four years.”

“Never really bothered me, I know how to block it all out pretty well, but it’s not the sort of place that should be left unlocked and unwarded, so I did both. Nothing terribly complicated, everyone else in the department as well as Maintenance had keys, and it kept the air clear which, of course, brought more people down there more often,” he waved that unpleasant part away, “and it was all just fine for several years.”

“And then, the new Undersecretary started, and she preferred regulation to be followed to the letter, and what I’d done was definitely not to the letter of any regulations. So, she comes down and tsk-tsks her way through the place, tells me it’s all got to come down and she’ll be sending in a Ministry approved contractor to ‘do it properly’,” Calleo absolutely used air quotes with that.

“They send someone down the next morning. Immediately get off on the wrong foot by only mildly sarcastically asking if he was “the Charms Wizard”, and that was apparently insulting. There’s also a reasonably good chance I meant it to be mildly hostile as well.”

“He starts work,” Calleo shook his head an pinched the bridge of his nose, “and not even five seconds in I stop him to tell him what he’s doing isn’t going to work and is just going to set off a barrage of various hexes and curses--not jinxes though, none on that particular shelf--if he keeps doing what he’s doing.”

“That idiot turns to me and all but sneers, ‘Which one of us is the professional here?’, and did not at all like my answer of, ‘I am.’, despite the fact that it was at least half true,” He took a deep breath before continuing, “he made a rude gesture at me, and turned back to doing what he was doing which caused the entire shelf and half the wall to go off.”

“I grew up around a lot of experimental magic, so I’m very used to how the air feels just before something explodes everywhere and had already put up a few shields around me. The Charms Wizard wasn’t quite as lucky and ended up on the floor by my desk. I started to explain what he’d done incorrectly and that standard warding and locking charms react very badly with most dark charms and he snaps back that nothing in here is charms--damn near everything is! That’s what most of the Dark Arts are, which, you know, you already know.”

“Fine though, not charms, horrible, icky, nasty cursed things. I try to explain this to him again and he tells me to get out because I’m distracting him, so I left. Worked across the way at a Muggle cafe, came back around five or so, and the place is in shambles. Charms Wizard mutters something about being back tomorrow, and I end up there until about three in the morning putting the office back together and calming down a lot of very insulted pieces of heavily cursed work.”

Calleo absently reached back to where he’d set the bottle and opened the top, “He shows up the next morning, this time with a cursebreaker, and orders me out of the room again. All right. I tell the cursebreaker not to actually break anything if she can manage to control herself and head back to the same cafe.”

“Oh, of course I didn’t bring any--” he muttered under his breath then just transfigured a quill into a small snifter and poured whatever was in the bottle into it, “Scaldi, if you want any--where was I? Oh right, back to the Muggle cafe. Spend the day working there again, come back to the cursebreaker blocking my door with ‘Yeah, you don’t want to go in there’.”

“First, it’s my office. Second, if you tell me I don’t want to go into my office, I will definitely want to go into my office, which is exactly what I did. Charms Wizard is pinned to the ceiling, the room’s in absolute shambles again, I start to ask the cursebreaker how long he’s been stuck to the ceiling and end up just turning back to the idiot on the ceiling to ask instead--about seven hours, and she couldn’t break the curse holding him there.”

“Ask why nobody thought to, you know, maybe bring someone else in? Find me? Anything? No good answer to that. At any rate, I was more than familiar with the text that pinned him there and accidentally slightly on purpose just let him fall to the floor when  countered it. Cursebreaker leaves, Charms Wizard gets up and dusts himself off and shoots me a look that probably was meant to actually kill when I said, “Same time tomorrow?”“

“Same time tomorrow rolls around, and guess who’s back? This time, I shut the door and told him that we could make this very easy; he lets me lock the place down again, I do it with a dicta-quill running so he’s got the instructions on how to deal with this sort of thing going forward, he signs off on the work stating that he did it, it’s all official, and we’re done. He agreed and was gone in an hour.” “So, more or less, it took three business days, a repeating mess, a lot of incredibly peeved cursed books and scrolls, a confused cursebreaker, and a Wizard stuck to my ceiling to put the wards back exactly the way I’d had them for years prior, only now they were ‘officially sanctioned’.”

Calleo finally seemed to be done with the rambling story of bureaucracy and started to lift his glass to take a drink, stopped, and blinked a few times as if coming to a sudden realisation, “Oh, right, hello!”

[crystaiskiess]

If the Crown Fits

AO3 LINK Summary:  “We would be like Romeo and Juliet if we dated.” Phil said absentmindedly.  Dan froze in shock.  “How so?” He asked with a forced casual air.  Phil shrugged, and turned the page, “Well forbidden love. Prince and servant aren’t exactly ideal.” He continued to read.  Dan was conscious of his mouth hanging open.

Or 

The Royalty AU nobody asked for in which Prince Daniel falls head over heels for his best friend and servant boy, Phil.

Author’s Notes:  Ok so I started this fic about 5 months ago and WOOP it's been a ride! From my beta Rachel (@diamond0604) constantly telling me OL OL OL OL OL etc. etc. (that means one line) to endless run throughs I feel as though this fic is my baby. Actually never mind this fic is MY BABY and I feel as though I'm sending him away and it's breaking my heart but whatever!So this is for the Phandom Big Bang therefore I have an amazing artist! (@alienenthusiast) And I've already mentioned Rachel who is sitting beside me to stop me from crying because that is likely oh god. Therefore without further ado I present my baby... If the Crown Fits!

10

Dan giggled as they ran through the courtyard, shoes and socks abandoned.

He turned his head around to face his friend, “You can’t catch me!” he laughed as he swivelled around a tree, only to find himself face to face with Phil.

“Or I can,” Phil grinned mischievously.

He tapped Dan gently on the arm before racing off.

Dan watched and groaned as his friend ran away, black fringe flying in the air behind him. With one more deep breath Dan chased after his friend who was easily faster than him. Dan gained ground on Phil which was a miracle and his hands skimmed Phil’s arm before a stick got in his way. He felt his feet fly out from beneath him and he crashed into Phil head first.

They both toppled over with gasps of shock, their limbs were tangled together and Dan started to giggle.

“What?” Phil asked with a confused look and brushed his legs off as they stood up.

Dan shot him an evil smirk, “You’re it!” He laughed before he raced off, only just catching the eye roll Phil aimed at him.

~-~-~

Dan was awful at maths.

All the endless numbers and equations gave him a headache. He ran his fingers along the sum he was attempting to work out but none of it made sense. Phil scribbled away beside him. Dan tried to catch his attention, but he wasn’t paying attention to him.

He turned to the question again.

3 + 2 = ?

6    6    ?

Dan groaned and buried his head in his hands. Finally Phil seemed to acknowledge Dan’s struggle as he chuckled.

“You right?” Phil whispered and Dan shook his head into his hands.

Their teacher glared at them over her laptop but said nothing.

“Need help?” He offered, Dan nodded against the table. “Alright where are you up to?” Phil asked as he scooted his chair beside Dan. Dan pointed to the question and Phil stifled a giggle into his palm.

“Hey!” Dan grumbled.

Phil shrugged, “That’s kinda pathetic Mr Dumb Bear.”

“It’s rude to insult a prince.” Dan attempted to find a way to defend himself but failed miserably.

Phil rolled his eyes, “Really? That’s the best you can do?” He smirked.

Whenever Phil smirked it looked like a smile but by now Dan knew the difference between a true smile and a smirk. They had grown up in the castle together after all.

“Help me please.” Dan begged, his lip stuck out in a pout.

Phil laughed at his false begging face but obliged anyway. Technically he probably wasn’t allowed to say no but Dan and Phil had never bothered with the servant’s rules.

As he poked Dan’s lip back into his mouth he pointed to the equation, “To start…”

~-~-~

“You have a banquet.” Phil mumbled over the top of his book.

Dan groaned, “I almost forgot!” He slammed down his book on the table with a loud clunk that made Phil jump in shock. He knew his mother, the Queen, would kill him if he was late.

Actually she would probably kill Phil, not that it was his fault but she would find a way to make it his fault.

“You should go get ready.” Phil added putting down his book as well.

Dan nodded, already getting ready to leave before he gasped, “Aren’t you helping set up?” He asked. Phil smacked his head and jumped to his feet.

“Your mum’s gonna kill me!” He groaned as he pulled on his vest.

Dan shooed him away, “If you go quick she might not notice!”

They both knew that wasn’t true but they could dream.

~-~-~

Dan sat on the rough chair, with a leveled glare at the wall as though it was forcing him to go the banquet. The wall of course had nothing to do with it, however it was the only thing in his line of vision, so it would have to do. His hair was being attended to by a new servant. Or should he say attacked by a new servant. She was spraying it so vigorously he was sure it would be a tough shell when she was finished. It was straightened out which was at least a relief.

“How about this one sir?” Ellen, his personal maid, asked as she presented a blue button up. Dan went to nod before he remembered that his hair was being attacked with a comb.

“Perfect Ellen thanks.” He mumbled.

She nodded before she marched out of his vision, her greyed hair pinned into her signature bun.

~-~-~

The banquet was just as boring as usual. Maria, the daughter of Duke and Duchess Maidon, was watching his with eyes wide the entire time. Dan avoided looking at her as she made him uncomfortable.

“Dan, how were your lessons today?” His father asked with a reassuring smile.

He felt Maria’s eyes burn into the back of his head as he turned to face him.

Dan shrugged mildly, “A little difficult but Phi-” he halted himself quickly, “I got some help and I understand it now.”

His parents nodded, his mother’s eyebrows slightly furrowed, unnoticeable to anyone who didn’t know her well, like Dan did. The servants smiled at him as they placed a plate of food in front of him. His parents and the Duke and Duchess of a nearby town began to discuss things Dan didn’t understand.

He swallowed a mouthful of his meal, and tried to avoid a conversation with Maria.

“In my opinion servants shouldn’t be friends with princes.”

Duchess Maidon scowled, her mouth twisted as she placed a piece of duck in her mouth with a pristine poshness.

Dan felt his cheeks burn but he didn’t comment. There was a pause before his mother replied,

“My opinion exactly.” She commented idly before changing the conversation to politics.

Dan didn’t stop glaring at his plate for the rest of the meal.

~-~-~

Phil bustled around Dan’s room dusting his shelves.

“How was the banquet?” He asked.

Dan felt his cheeks burn as he remembered the Duchess’ comment. He couldn’t tell Phil.

He shrugged, “Boring as ever.” He muttered, as he stared at the roof. Phil seemed to accept that, not that it wasn’t true. He grew quiet while he focused on polishing a vase.

“What do you want to do when you’re older Phil?” Dan asked.

He tended to ask Phil questions like that, as they made him feel more normal. Normal kids didn’t know for certain what they would be when they were only ten.

Phil laughed softly, “King’s Advisor. What else?” He muttered.

Dan nodded, he should have expected that answer. Phil’s father was the King’s Advisor and as his mother had died when he was young, it made sense that he would take the role.

“Ok… but do you have any things you want to do first? In the castle or out.”

Dan waited while Phil thought, as he moved to Dan’s TV and wiped it clean.

Eventually he nodded, “I want to wait the parties so I can see you forced to wear your fancy outfits and talk to snobby kids.” Phil poked out his tongue.

Dan rolled his eyes, “Ugh don’t remind me! I’ve got a party this weekend and I’m not looking forward to it.” He groaned.

Phil snickered, “I know.”

There was another lapse of silence before Phil sighed lightly.

“I do want to wait parties though. It seems like fun. Getting to be a part of it all.”

Dan nodded.

“It’s not fun, but I understand."

~-~-~

Dan stared at his shoes while his mother scolded him, and waited for it to be over.

“You are a prince Daniel.” She groans, “I allow you to play games, but not during your piano lesson.”

Dan sighed involuntarily, “I forgot it was my piano lesson Mum.”

She narrowed her eyes, “It was because of Lester the servant boy wasn’t it?” She asked calmly, although he knew she was anything but calm currently.

“No, it wasn’t Phil Mum.”

His mother let out a heavy breath through her nose at the use of Phil’s first name.

In her opinion it was correct to call servants by their surname and nothing else.

Dan of course disagreed.

“Lester,” she hissed, “Has had a very bad influence on you Daniel.”

Dan resisted the urge to scream, “No he hasn’t.” He growled under his breath, as he attempted and failed to be hostile.

The Queen shook her head in displeasure.

“If it wasn’t for your father, I would ban you from speaking to him.” She said coldly.

Dan met her steel glare with his own, “Lucky Dad’s here then."

~-~-~

Dan and Phil were playing an intense round of Mario Kart when his father knocked on the door.

“Can I speak to you Dan?” He asked with a smile, “Who was winning?” He added as Phil had begun to shut off the game.

“Speedy Bear, as always.” Phil grumbled, the King was very obvious in his liking of Phil, unlike the Queen who clearly wanted nothing to do with the boy. Dan grinned at his father while he laughed softly, “Well run along Philip, I’ll call for you to return when I’m done with Dan.” He said and shooed Phil out of the room

Phil bowed quickly before he scurried away, despite knowing The King would never get angry at him about the rules. Bowing was customary and Phil was trying to practise.

“I thought we could get lunch?” His father suggested, already indicating for Dan to follow him out of the room. Dan grinned, he knew that by lunch his father meant they would go to the kitchens to have a sandwich and sit in the small dining area. He enjoyed his time with his father anyway.

“Sounds awesome!” He exclaimed, and leapt to his feet in excitement.

They walked along the hallways in comfortable silence, Dan with a slight skip in his step.

He loved eating with his parents, especially his father as both of them were very busy. Barely having time for Dan except for dinners and banquets. He understood though, running the country was a difficult thing to do. A lot of their energy was focused on doing the right thing for their people, and that meant they didn’t have much time for their son.

It didn’t stop him from celebrating the occasional times like these.

“So what did you want to tell me?” Dan asked as they entered the kitchens.

His father smiled at him affectionately, Dan was known for being curious, “I'll tell you when we sit down.”

Dan sighed heavily but followed his father to the servants dining room. A couple of maids were eating there, and seemed surprised to see the King and the Prince. A few however knew that when they had time Dan loved to frequent the private dining room.

Either with Phil or his father, as it kept him feeling like a reasonably normal boy, unlike the giant church like dining room for the royals. In fact, Dan rarely went into the royal dining room if he could avoid it. It only served to remind him how different he was.

They sat down with a plate of sandwiches and some chocolate milk for Dan, and a coffee on the way for his father.

“So? What do you want to tell me?” Dan asked impatiently, as he grinned from ear to ear he dug into his sandwich. The King rolled his eyes fondly, while he wiped crumbs from the corners of Dan’s mouth, “Well would you like good news or bad news first?” He asked.

Dan furrowed his eyebrows at that question.

After a bit of thought he replied, “Bad. Get it over with quickly.” He said, as he took a big gulp of chocolate milk.

His father nodded, “Right, well then.” He paused, to think about how to word the news Dan assumed, “Your mother and I are going on a business trip so Nanny Madison will look after you.”

Dan groaned, and slumped over so his head knocked on the table.

“I should have said good news first.” He grumbled, voice muffled by his arm as he continued to lean on it. His father laughed gently, and pushed his head off the table.

“We won’t be gone long, besides you haven’t heard the good news.” He pointed out.

Dan perked up slightly, but not much. He hated when Nanny Madison looked after him.

She was even stricter than his mother, as she believed Phil would “taint” his prince qualities, so they didn’t get to spend much time with each other. She even believed Dan should learn boring skills like fencing, like the old prince days.

“Nothing like the good old days,” she would say, as she handed Dan a terrifying mask and a sharp thin sword.

“The party this weekend has been rescheduled, and Philip will take over for Ellen while we’re gone as she is accompanying us.” His father said with a knowing grin. Dan perked up considerably, Nanny Madison wouldn’t be able to stop him from seeing Phil after all.

“He’s not too young?” Dan asked joyfully.

The King shook his head, “It will be good training for him, Nikki will guide him of course, but mostly it will be Philip.”

Dan squealed with delight, wrapping his arms around his father, nearly knocking over their drinks in the process. His father chuckled into the hug but held Dan in his arms gently.

11

Dan waved to Phil from the window. Phil had been piled up with work recently for the upcoming party, (Dan was trying to forget).

Unfortunately, that meant the two boys hadn’t been able to spend as much time as usual.

Dan trudged his way back to the huge grand piano. He stretched his fingers over the cool white keys. Eventually he decided he would play his favourite piece, Fur Elise. The notes tinkled and filled the air in a way that even his piano teacher was impressed.

“You ‘ave have practised?” She said simply in her french accent, as though this was a new concept. Dan nodded despite the fact that he hadn’t practised since their last lesson. Piano came reasonably naturally to him, most of the time, “Of course.”

She smiled, while she adjusted her long brown hair so that it wouldn’t get in the way.

“Show me Symphony 40.” She brandished to the piano and he nodded.

Even though he hated Symphony 40.

~-~-~

Parties were in Dan’s opinion worse than banquets, as he hated to be looked down upon, and that’s what happened for the entire party.

Duchesses would smile stiffly at him, as though they couldn’t quite remember how to smile, exchange a few words. All the while they looked as though the last thing they wanted to do was talk to a small “child”, he was an eleven year old not a baby.

Nevertheless they barely had a conversation before moving on there way.

Dukes were no better.

Besides, just like at banquets, Phil wasn’t allowed to attend, which left Dan miserable and alone.

He hated the other rarities of young children who stuck their noses in the air and trod as though on smashed glass, one flat foot and they would be doomed.

God Dan hated them, more than words could express.

One girl, with a bony chin and huge brown eyes would stare over at him, her mouth pressed into a thin line and her dark brown hair curled into an elaborate updo.

Dan had never spoken to her though as she was always by the side of a tall prince who he wanted nothing to do with.

As the clock struck nine Dan began to wonder if he would be able to leave, after three hours of utter boredom he was ready to be out.

Suddenly he saw Phil emerge through a side door, black hair messy from the wrestling he and Dan had done earlier. Dan watched as his best friend went over to a waiter and begun to collect plates and crockery, until it was stacked to nearly the height of Phil himself. All Dan could do was watch in horror as more plates were added to the pile, this left Phil’s legs trembling and his mouth screwed up in concentration.

Dan already knew everything would go wrong before it did, it was like watching a movie in slow motion. One moment it was all fine, Phil was about to leave the room with his ridiculously tall pile of plates, the next there was a smash as Phil’s legs gave way beneath him.

Plates and crockery of every sort smashed to the ground, which left a maze of shattered glass and pottery around Phil.

Both Dan and his mother ran towards him at the same time, but for different reasons.

Dan could see his mother compose her ‘we will talk later face’ as they raced across the ballroom.

Phil sat amongst the rubble, crying silently, cuts in his hands and knees from the smashed plates that had cut into him, Dan reached him first as his mother tried to appear semi composed.

The entire ballroom watched them but Dan couldn’t care less, he was a kid after all, if they wanted to treat him like one he would be one.

“Phil,” he said when he was in earshot, stepping over smashed glass to reach his best friend who sniffled as Dan pulled him into a hug, “It’s gonna be okay.”

~-~-~

Dan was sat on the floor of the servant quarters, piles of spelling words spilt over his legs. He was testing Phil while he folded the royal family’s clothes.

“Rhubarb?” Dan asked being sure to hold the card out of Phil’s view.

Phil groaned reaching for a pair of trousers.

“I haven’t got a clue.” He muttered. “I’m going to fail.”

Dan shook his head, “That’s what I say every maths test, and what do you say?” He asked with his eyebrows raised.

Phil sighed, “You need to believe in your abilities.”

“Exactly!” Dan clapped his hands together, “Now, Rhubarb.”

Phil sighed, “R - H - U - B?” He paused and Dan nodded in encouragement. “A - R - B?” He finished.

Dan let out a whoop of excitement, “Correct!”

“Wait really!” Phil dropped the t-shirt he was folding in shock.

Dan nodded happily, before he picked up the next card.

“I knew you could do it.”  

~-~-~

“I’m bored,” Phil complained, and sprawled himself across Dan’s lap so that he couldn’t focus on his homework.

Dan groaned, as he tried to shove Phil off him, “Go away! I’m doing my homework!” Dan said with one final push.

Phil didn’t relent, staying on his lap as he continued to pout, “but I’m bored!” He repeated as though that would make Dan change his mind. “Come on grumpy bear!”

“Plus it’s hot and I don’t have any work to do! We can have a water fight.” Phil said and poked Dan in the side.

Dan’s ears pricked up despite himself, “Do we have water balloons?” He said, as he attempted to keep a calm air about him.

He must have failed because Phil smirked, “Yes,” he said with a shrug, “But I thought you wanted to do your homework so…” He trailed off and Dan groaned, before he slammed his laptop shut and turned to stare at his smirking friend.

“I hate you,” Dan grumbled as he stood up.

Phil let out a whoop of excitement, and began to drag Dan along by his arm.

As they entered the kitchen, Dan grinned; Phil had already gotten out a bucket of water balloons.

“Someone was prepared,” Dan turned to Phil who shrugged in embarrassment.

They walked over to the sink which wasn’t being used by anyone, “Well I figured you couldn’t turn down a water fight,” Phil explained.

Dan nodded, Phil had always known him better than he knew himself, and he was never one to turn down a water fight.

The King wandered out of the pantry, a cookie stuck out of his mouth. He glanced at the two boys who were stood in front of the sink, “What are you two doing?” He asked.

Dan started, he hadn’t heard his father walk into the room, “We’re going to have a water fight!” He replied excitedly.

The King laughed, the sound loud and booming, “Do either of you actually know how to fill up a water balloon?” he asked with a knowing raise of his dark eyebrow.

Dan turned to Phil who stared back at him with wide eyes, well this had created a problem. Phil shook his head sheepishly and the King laughed again, as he moved over to help them.

As he taught them how to correctly fill up a water balloon Dan couldn’t stop the smile that bloomed, the grin on his face physically hurt his cheek muscles. The King would laugh loudly whenever Dan or Phil accidentally burst one all over themselves (it was mostly Dan). Even Dan couldn’t help but laugh loudly as Phil accidentally slipped on water and ended up splashing a water balloon over Dan’s head. Dan retaliated by leaping on him which left both boys soaked.

In the end the water fight never quite made it outside.

12

Dan was well and truly sick of parties. The tape measure was cold against his bare chest and Phil laughed softly as he shivered.

“Oi!” Dan grumbled, Phil poked out his tongue but didn’t say anything. The seamstress clucked her tongue at him.

“Do not move Your Highness, it makes it far too difficult.” She scolded him gently, in her so-posh-it-must-be-fake British accent. Although Dan could hardly talk, he sounded like Winnie the Pooh. Phil snickered under his breath.

“Lester,” she turned her head absentmindedly and Phil jumped into straight posture, “Pass me the red silk dear.”

Phil nodded as he retrieved the bright material. She held it against the white material she was fitting Dan with and turned to Phil.

“What are your thoughts?” She asked with a tilt of the head.

Dan felt a swell of gratitude, she had gotten so sick of Dan asking for Phil’s opinions, she had begun to do so herself. Phil furrowed his eyebrows in thought before grabbing the white material and holding it against Dan’s chest.

“It really brings out his eyes, and the red is a strong comparison to his complexion.”

Dan felt his cheeks flush red.

“I agree.” The seamstress, Betty, nodded.

Betty had left them in private to discuss the material choices for his other garments.

They were sat on the floor of his bedroom (if it could be called a bedroom, it was more like a Dan’s wing) surrounded by various fabrics, embroidery and silks.

“This one would be nice?” Phil held up a blue silk. Dan watched the way the light danced on the blue fabric, perfectly reflecting his friends eyes.

“Nah, would be nicer on you.” He muttered, as he looked back down at the materials on his lap.

Phil raised his eyebrows.

“I won’t ever need it. The King’s advisor doesn’t wear silks.” Phil replied casually.

Dan wondered how strange their conversations would sound to normal twelve year olds.

Twelve year olds who didn’t grow up in a castle.

Twelve year olds who didn’t wear silks, or jewels.

Dan shrugged, “I’m just saying it would look nicer on you. Plus that type of linen scratches me.”

Phil nodded and put it down gently.

Phil held up a pale green material against Dan’s bare chest. His cold fingers made Dan shiver.

“Are you cold, Bear?” Phil smirked evilly.

He pressed freezing fingers against the bare skin. Dan shuddered and attempted to push the icy hands off him but Phil didn’t let up.

He poked his finger into Dan’s side, “Phil!” Dan exclaimed.

His mother walked into the room just as the word left his lips, of course.

“Lester,” she said curtly, “How is the material choice?”

Phil swallowed heavily and Dan felt himself sob internally.

“It’s going well Ma’am,” Phil was stood in front of Dan with his back as straight as a pole, all emotion drained from his face. Betty walked in and eyed him curiously before she saw Dan's mother.

“Your Majesty,” she curtseyed quickly, “Is everything alright ma’am?”

His mother nodded, before she turned to Phil, “Show me,” she waved her hand impatiently. Phil scrambled to hold the material against Dan yet again, this time Dan didn’t shudder at the cold. Or laugh at his friend tickling him.

His mother watched them warily, “Yes. It will do nicely.”

~-~-~

Dan pulled at his collar which was cutting into the skin beneath his neck. He glanced up at the large clock, three hours to go. He let out a sigh involuntarily just as a prince from a nearby country approached him.The boy was at least four years older than Dan but he had a name Dan couldn’t quite put his finger on.

Phil would remember, he was good at names.

“Hello Daniel, lovely party,” The prince smiled at him.

Dan nodded, he felt short and inferior compared to the tall teenager.

“Yes… lovely.” Dan glanced up at the clock again, only to be disappointed by a minute that had passed.

He restrained himself from groaning, and the boy raised his eyebrows in disbelief. Dan couldn’t blame him. Dan folded his small gloved hands behind his back, attempting to make himself look innocent.

“You don’t look as though you’re enjoying it,” The prince smirked.

Dan scrambled for a topic change, “I apologise but I believe I’ve forgotten your name,” he smiled politely.

“It’s James.”

Of course it’s James. Such a posh name for a posh person.

“That’s a very nice name.” Dan replied.

James laughed airily, as though he didn’t believe him.

He shook his head, “You’re a strange child Daniel.”

“There aren't many ordinary princes.”

Dan was hovering around the table, covered in various punches and wines. All served in glass goblets. People smiled and greeted him as he passed but nobody attempted to start a conversation, which Dan was grateful for. He hated the forced conversations and the polite exchanges. For not the first time that night, he wished Phil was at the party, so he could talk to someone normal.

“You look sad Daniel.” A duchess greeted him as she picked up a piece of bruschetta.

Dan shook his head politely, “Not at all ma’am. Just tired.” He gestured to the clock, which was proudly bearing 10:00 pm in large gold numbers. She nodded knowingly, most twelve year olds would be asleep by now after all, Dan chose not mention that Phil usually crept into his room around this time.

It was a perfectly acceptable lie for a twelve year old.

“You should see if you can totter off to bed?” She offered before gliding away. He hated the way posh people, like his parents, seemed to glide rather than walk, as though a simple walk was far too ordinary for them.

He glanced at the clock.

The news of him being “tired” would spread to his mother in the next ten minutes, who always listened in to conversations. He should be out of here within a quarter of an hour.

Sure enough, his mother approached him as the clock hit quarter past.

“You’re tired Daniel?” She asked with a kind smile. He loved his mother much more when she was in a good mood, she was so much more approachable.

“Yes,” he added a yawn for extra measure.

She glanced at the clock delicately and seemed shocked by the time.

“I’m not surprised either! Goodness!” She waved him away, “You go off to bed now.”

He nodded and dashed off before she could change her mind.

~-~-~

Phil was waiting in his room as usual.

They were used to the routine by now.

Dan would go to a party which he was unhappy about.

He would get out early by pretending to be tired

Phil would meet him in his room for the run down of Dan’s boredom.

Phil glanced at his watch.

“You’re earlier than usual.” He commented casually.

Dan shrugged, “It was an easy fake this time. Duchess Lendon was concerned.”

Phil nodded in understanding, Duchess Lendon had always been the most motherly of them all.

“Tell me everything.” Phil grinned.

Dan took a deep breath before he began his spiel, starting with Prince James who had talked to him for an hour.

13

“Are you positive?” Dan asked again as he followed Phil around and cleaned cabinets.

“Yes.” Phil replied without even a glance up from the glass he was scrubbing.

Dan bit his lip nervously, “But what if-”

Phil cut him off by finally meeting eyes with Dan irritably, “I want to wait the parties Dan. It’s never going to happen if I don’t ask your mum.”

“Yeah but-“

“No buts. I’m going to do it now.” Phil said as he completed the cleaning with a final wipe.

Dan huffed nervously but otherwise let him go without complaint.

“Good luck!” He called out.

~-~-~

Phil had been busy since the morning and Dan was dying to speak to him.

What did his mother say? He slammed his hands down on the piano keys. There was no way he could practise with this kind of stress. So he made the decision to give up and go find Phil, with a slam of the lid he got up to exit the room.

Jonathan, a servant, rushed into the room.

“Goodness Sir are you ok?” The thin balding man asked with a gasp.

Dan shuffles awkwardly, “Yes Jonathan sorry.” He scratched his head, “I’m just not in the right headspace to play.”

Jonathan nodded in understanding, “I understand Mister Daniel but please,” He gestured to the shiny piano, black gloss glittering in the warm sunlight, “Don’t injure the piano because of it.” He winked softly before waving Dan out of the room.

~-~-~

From Dan 3:27 pm 3/06

where are you!?! i need to know how it went

From Dan 3:30 pm 3/06

if you don’t reply i’m going to kill you

From Dan 3:32 pm3/06

i know you have your phone on you!!! you always do!!!

From Dan 3:33 pm 3/06

seriously???

From Dan 3:36 pm 3/06

this is getting ridiculous...

From Phil 3:37 pm 3/06

You’re unbelievable :) I’m in the east wing, I was washing dishes so I couldn’t reply you dork

From Dan 3:37 pm 3/06

coming now!!! (i’m a prince not a dork :P)

From Phil 3:38 pm 3/06

Prince Dork then!

~-~-~

“How did it go?” Dan pounced on Phil the second he saw him. Phil let out a grunt as they fell over.

“Really?” Phil asked with an eye roll while he stood up, “She said yes by the way. But I have to go through extensive training first.”

Dan pumped his fist in the air with a whoop of excitement. Phil laughed softly, as he picked up a pile of washing from beside him, “Come on. We can talk while I hang this washing up.”

~-~-~

From Dan 10:02 am 8/10

i haven’t seen you in days are you ok???

From Dan 10:20 am 9/10

phil??? You literally haven’t been talking to me are you alright???

From Dan 9:30 am 11/10

phil???

From Dan 9:40 am 11/10

what’s going on???

Seen at 11:40

From Dan 12:40 am 12/10

why did you walk off on me today??? you yelled something out but I couldn’t hear you

From Phil 12:42 am 12/10

Hey Dan! Sorry cant talk fr long supwr busy

Your mum has beem loading me witj work

she

From Dan 12:43 am 12/10

she what???

From Dan 12:44 am 12/10

phil

From Dan 12:45 am 12/10

meet me at my room at 6 ok???

From Phil 12:59 am 12/10

k

~-~-~

Dan sat on his bed and waited. It was 6:30 and Phil still hadn’t turned up.

He felt his fingers twitch towards his phone, but there was no point. Phil hardly replied to his texts currently anyway. There was the sound of fast footsteps before Phil burst in, hair ruffled and face red from running.

“I’m so sorry,” Phil gasped, as he collapsed onto Dan’s bed

Dan shook his head, “It’s okay.” he paused before asking the question that had been plaguing him for days, “What’s going on?”

Phil sighed, “I’ve had so much work lately. I just don’t have time to hang out.”

“Or answer texts,” Dan pointed out. Phil seemed to see something interesting on his shoes.

“Yeah, or answer texts.”

Dan rolled his eyes, “I thought you were mad at me or something.”

Phil looked up with so much shock in his eyes that Dan felt bad.

“Why would I be mad at you?” He asked, forehead creased in worry.

Dan sighed, “I don’t know… I guess you just hardly were speaking to me and I freaked out. We just...” He could feel Phil’s eyes on him, waiting for him to finish. “We just… always talk. We’ve never split up before.”

Phil looked exhausted and sad.

“I’m sorry Dan. I really am.” He watched Dan with hopeful eyes, “If I could get away from all the work I would.”

Dan smiled, “I know.”

~-~-~

Phil couldn’t get away from the work.

He was making an effort to text Dan, that much Dan could tell. However he had no time to actually see Dan, or really do anything fun anymore.

Dan was on his computer, finger tapping the mouse absentmindedly, when suddenly it struck him.

“Mum.” He muttered to himself.

Why had it not been obvious before?

She was giving Phil too much work on purpose.

To keep him away from Dan.

He leapt to his feet and slammed the chair into his desk.

Just as he was leaving his room his father came in.

“Dan!” He said as they bumped into each other. Dan slowed to a stop and turned to his father.

“Sorry Dad, is it important?” He asked as he walked back into his bedroom.

The King nodded while he settled onto one of Dan’s plush couches.

“It’s about Ellen.” He said and indicated to Dan to sit down.

“Is she ok?” Dan asked worriedly.

Was she ok? Was she sick?

His father smiled at his concern, “Don’t worry. She’s fine.” He assured his worried son, “In fact she’s pregnant!” The King announced with a joyful smile.

Dan couldn’t stop the smile spread over his face, however a small niggle at the back of his mind was saying what now?

“That’s great! So she’ll be going on maternal leave for a bit or…” Dan trailed off as he saw his father shake his head slowly.

“That is why I need to talk to you,” he said, “She wants to be a stay at home mother so-“

Dan finished for him, “So she’s resigning.”

The King nodded and waited for Dan to speak again.

“I need a new personal maid.” Dan supplied and his father looked pleased.

“Yes, and I thought you were old enough to pick on your own.”

The solution presented itself to Dan so clear and simple he could almost laugh.

“Completely up to me?” He checked.

His father raised an eyebrow curiously but said, “Yes. Your mother has agreed.”

“Phil.” Dan said excitedly.

His father smiled as though that was expected.

“It will be done.” He said simply with a small shrug and a wink.

Dan couldn’t fight the huge smile that spread over his face.

~-~-~

His mother was furious. Except she couldn’t do anything about it at all. She had already agreed after all.

“Pick someone else Daniel.” She growled, arms crossed over her body like an angry barrier.

Dan stood firm, “No. I choose Phil. He would be perfect as he already knows me so well.” He smiled sweetly. She narrowed her eyes, knowing that she was beaten.

“Go tell him.” She said sternly.

He grinned while he raced off to tell his friend.

To Phil 3:21 pm 18/10

where are you? i have news!!!

To Dan 3:22 pm 18/10

Washing room? You OK?

~-~-~

Dan ran as fast as he could, his chest begged him to stop but his brain repeated

Phil, Phil, Phil, Phil

He could scream with happiness. After three weeks of barely talking Dan couldn’t take it anymore.

“Phil!” He exclaimed as he dashed into the washroom.

Despite being entirely out of breath he was still bouncing with happiness.

“Dan!” Phil replied as Dan leapt on him. “What on Earth?”

He had to stop himself from squealing at the prospect of Phil being around him all the time.

“Guess who’s my new personal maid?”

Phil’s eyes widened as the words left Dan’s lips.

“No way!” He gasped, understanding straight away.

“Yes!” Dan grinned.

Phil dropped the wash basket to wrap his arms around Dan, it clattered to the floor and spilt piles of clothes everywhere. Dan grinned as he hugged his best friend back tightly.  

14

At midnight Dan woke up drenched in sweat and shaking like a leaf. He only just made it to the bathroom before he vomited up the contents of his stomach.

Where was the button for Phil again? His sick brain only half worked. There was a moment of panic before his stomach lurched again. He sobbed softly, his stomach swirling.

That’s when he remembered the button.

There was one on the sink basin.

He raised a shaky hand to the small button and pushed down on it before his stomach lurched again.

It was really hot in the room, despite the fact that he wasn't wearing a shirt.

“Dan!” Phil gasped, glasses askew on his face and hair messy from sleep.

Dan whimpered softly in response, there was an aching pain in his stomach that seemed to spread through his body.

“Oh Dan, okay where does it hurt?” Phil murmured softly, voice still slightly husky from only just waking up. Dan pointed to his stomach. “Are you hot or cold?”

“Hot.” Dan replied, voice soft and shaky from the pain.

Phil nodded, and helped Dan to his feet.

“Ok, I’m taking you to your bed.” Phil explained to him, “I’m going to turn on your air conditioner and get you a bucket.”

Dan nodded.

“You’re going to take off your pants so that you’re not too hot. Do you want ice?” Phil helped him onto the bed.

Dan nodded shakily.

Phil raced off.

Dan pulled off his pyjama pants so that he was just in his boxers. His stomach lurched again but he didn’t throw up, luckily.

Phil returned with ice, a bucket and some medicine.

“Here you go.” He said as he handed Dan the ice pack.

Dan took it gratefully and placed the soothing cold on his head. Phil passed him some medicine.

“You’re going to be ok,” Phil’s voice was soft and comforting.

He stroked Dan’s hair softly while Dan clutched his stomach from the stabbing pain.

“Thank you.” Dan whispered back.

~-~-~

“Are you alright Dan?” Phil checked in on him later that afternoon. Dan opened his eyes drowsily.

“Uck,” He groaned.

Phil chuckled softly, “Your Mum is going to come in a bit, she’s just wrapping up a meeting.” He told Dan, moving around the room to swap a glass of water and give Dan some new medicine.

“No, don’t leave.” Dan pouted as Phil turned to leave the room.

Phil laughed gently, “Dan, you have clothes that need to be washed, and I told you, your Mum is coming.” He shook his head, a small smile tugging at the corners of his lips.

“Okay…” Dan dragged out the end of the word and added puppy dog eyes for extra emphasis. Phil merely shrugged with another soft laugh and left the room.

Dan flopped back down, the pillows surrounded his head. His stomach gave an uncomfortable lurch but he had long since emptied his stomach.

“Dan?” He heard his mother ask from the doorway.

“Come in Mother,” he smiled through the pain, sitting himself up against the pile of pillows.

She sighed softly when she was his flushed form, “Are you alright? Have you eaten?” She fretted, perching on the couch beside his bed.

“I’m fine and no I tried a while ago and vomited it back up.” He replied, his body shook  from the cold despite the fact that he was sweating like he was in sauna.

She pursed her lips, “Do you have a fever?”

“Yeah I think so.” He cuddled the blankets around him.

“Do you want me to get you a doctor to come in?” She said with a tinge of worry threaded through her words. Dan nodded.

“You should probably sleep. I’ll call a doctor,” she smiled gently at him, before exiting as quickly as Phil had done. Dan repeated the action of collapsing back into the pile of pillows, sleep greeted him much faster than expected.

He dreamt like a photo album.

Small snippets that constantly changed.

Each as random as the last.

He was in charge of four bawling babies.

All that surrounded him was an empty dark abyss.

He was at a ball surrounded by girls but he instantly migrated to a young prince.

Geese pecked at him from every angle.

He was drowning in a sea of cats.

Phil poked him gently and he woke with a start.

“You right?” He asked and passed him a glass of icy water.

Dan nodded, “Yeah just… weird dreams I guess?” He chuckled, but the dream about the ball was stuck in his brain like glue. Phil didn’t look convinced but shrugged it off, “You were talking in your sleep a bit.” he snickered, “Don’t peck me bad geese no!” Phil flailed his arms mockingly.

Dan rolled his eyes, “Shut up!” He scoffed, “I’ll have you know they were pecking from every angle.” He stuck out his tongue.

“Nice to see your usual sarcastic attitude back,” Phil smiled genuinely.

Dan grinned back, his hair still stuck to his face with sweat.

~-~-~

When Dan finally emerged from his sickness there was a another party in three days. Phil was finally, after a year of training, going to wait a party. Dan for the first time ever was excited about the party, he wouldn’t be suffering through it alone. He could also tell that Phil was bubbling with excitement.

Phil bounded around Dan’s room, smile glowing on his face.

“Come on!” Phil exclaimed.

Dan groaned as Phil passed him his shirt and pants.

“I don’t wanna!” He flopped onto his bed, throwing his hand to his forehead for dramatic effect. Phil rolled his eyes and pulled Dan's foot so that he fell off the bed. “Get up, the party’s in an hour you don’t have time to be fussy.”

Dan stuck out his bottom lip in a pout, Phil smirked and poked the lip back in.

“Come on get up!” He said far to happily for Dan’s liking.

~-~-~

Dan smiled politely at the princesses who curtsied to him. He gave them a small bow back. Although he could clearly see the princesses were beautiful, he found himself wishing he could meet more princes.

Like in his dream a few weeks ago.

He shook away the feelings hurriedly.

Now was not the time to question his opinions on princesses, he didn’t need a partner yet anyway.

Someone tapped him delicately on the shoulder.

“Would you like a drink sir?” A familiar voice asked, a teasing tone added for extra measure.

Dan rolled his eyes as he turned to face Phil, “Do you have any alcohol?” He asked sarcastically.

Phil tutted at him, “Absolutely not! Take a non alcoholic drink.” He inclined his head to the tray he was carrying.

Dan smiled gratefully and took a glass.

“How’re you liking the party scene?” He asked with a smirk.

Phil laughed, “I’m beginning to see why you got so bored, they’re all just drifting in their fancy way.”

Dan pulled a face in agreement.

“Hello Daniel.” A voice said from behind him.

Dan grimaced at Phil before he turned to face James, who had spoken to him at any party possible. Despite the four year age gap and the fact that Dan hated him.

“Drink.” James snapped his fingers at Phil.

Phil looked shocked by the abrupt rudeness of it but maintained a polite manner anyway, “What would you like?” He asked.

“Wine.” James said just as harshly and held out his hand for the glass.

Phil carefully retrieved a glass from his tray and passed it to the snobby prince.

“Have you met my sister, Cecilia?” James asked with a slight incline of the head.

Dan wanted to punch him for the way he had spoken to Phil but he forced himself to remain calm.

“No.” He replied through gritted teeth.

James raised his eyebrows at the curt answer but simply finished his drink with a gulp.

“You should,” He said, “Another.” He snapped at Phil again.

Phil passed him another drink, sharing a look with Dan.

As the glass came into contact with James’ gloved hands it slipped through his fingers, smashing to the ground and spilling wine all over the prince’s legs.

“Look what you did!” James sneered at Phil.

A few people had turned to stare at them in shock.

“I-I’m sorry I thought you had it.” Phil replied shakily.

Dan stepped to comfort him, placing a hand on his arm.

“It wasn’t his fault that you didn’t hold onto it properly.” Dan said to James with a protective glare.

James scoffed, “Sticking up for the servant? What is he your boyfriend?” He asked with a smirk.

“No. He’s my friend.” Dan growled. “Leave us alone.”

James spun on his heel and marched off without another word.

Phil smiled at him gratefully before he ducked to his knees to wipe up the spilt wine.  

15

“Dan! You need to get ready for god’s sake!” Phil exclaimed when he walked into the room.

Dan huffed but turned off the video game anyway.

“But I don’t want a gala!” He pouted.

Phil rolled his eyes, “Come on you’ve only got three hours and I need to get you ready.”

“I hate this,” he groaned, and screwed up his face in over exaggerated anguish.

Phil laughed, the soft sound filled Dan’s veins.

“We haven’t even started!” He exclaimed and pulled Dan to his feet.

Dan sat on the couch as Phil brought out two suits.

“I have to wear a suit!” Dan exclaimed and smashed his head into the pillow beside him.

Phil chuckled, “Yes you do.” He held them up, “Now which one?”

Dan turned to look at them, one was a navy blue with a pale blue shirt, the other was black with a crisp white shirt.

“The black one, like my soul.” He muttered and pointed to the black suit.

Phil laughed, “Perfect choice.”

Dan stuck out his tongue, Phil copied the action. Somehow making it so adorable Dan wanted to kiss him.

Did I really just think that?

Dan walked out of the change room, the suit fitted him perfectly, it shaped all the right places and made Dan look so much more handsome than he was. He could have sworn Phil’s cheeks tinted slightly pink when he walked out.

Probably because the room was very warm.

“On a scale of 1-10 how awful do I look? 1 being you look like a literal trash can, and 10 being I would make out with you in that suit.” He spread his arms awkwardly to show off the outfit. Phil stroked his chin in thought, “I’d say about a 9?” He said eventually.

Dan nodded, and ignored the thumping of his chest as his best friend stepped forward to adjust his collar.

“Jewel cufflinks or silver?” Dan asked Phil, as he turned to the boy who was strewn out across the bed. He showed the ruby cufflinks his mother had bought him for his birthday.

Phil screwed up his nose, “Definitely silver, jewels make you look tacky.”

“Really?” Dan replied and put down the rubies, picking up the silver. Phil nodded as he helped Dan attach them to the sleeves of his shirt.

“They look like you’re saying,” Phil spoke in an over the top british accent, “Woop-di-doo I’m a prince! I have money and jewels yay!”

Dan snorted at the awful impression.

“I do not speak like that!” He poked Phil in the side.

Phil smirked, “Sure you don’t Winnie the Pooh.” He teased.

“Oi!” Dan pushed him over onto his bed.

Phil laughed loudly as he grabbed Dan by the tie and pulled him down as well.

“If I look so tacky why did you let me where jewels so often!” Dan sat up with a start.

Phil shrugged, “I wasn’t allowed input into your outfit choices I guess.”

Dan pushed him, “You know I would have listened to you.”

There was a short pause before Phil chuckled, “Yeah I suppose you would have. I just didn’t think it was my place.”

“It’s always your place.” Dan said and poked his friend in the cheek.

Phil shrugged, “Well then, don’t wear jewels they’re tacky and I hate them.”

Dan rolled his eyes, unable to keep the grin off his face as he checked the time on his phone, “Oh shit!” He exclaimed as he leapt to his feet, “Come on! Mum’s going to kill me if I’m late!”

Phil groaned, “That’s what I’ve been saying all afternoon!”

~-~-~

He stood at the front of the room, the large crown heavy on his head. Hundreds of “eligible” young girls in beautiful dresses watched him eagerly. It was expected that he would go forward and dance with the girls he was considering.

But he wasn’t considering anyone.

After all he was only fifteen!

Why would he need a girlfriend, why would he want one? If he was honest with himself he had a crush on someone else, and it certainly wasn’t one of those princesses. He could just imagine how everyone would react if he went up to Phil and danced with him out of everyone in the room. Phil waved gently from the food table where he was waiting for his tray of cakes.

His mother sent him a look that said, “Daniel dance with one of them!”

He swallowed the hatred of the evening he stepped towards a pretty girl with blonde hair. She practically squealed with excitement and stepped away from her group of friends.

“Hi,” he bowed.

“H-hello,” she curtsied awkwardly back. With a smile he took her waist and her hand gently. They waltzed around the room, while jealous girls eyed them with looks of malice.

“So what’s your name?” He asked politely.

She smiled, “Elizabeth.”

Wow how original.

“That’s a lovely name.”

“Thank you.” He bowed again as they finished.

“No, thank you,” she said with another quick curtsey before she scurried away.

End me.

He scooted his way over to Phil while he had the chance.

“Hello.” Phil smiled as he approached.

“Hi.” Dan replied with a heavy sigh.

Phil chuckled and handed a princess a cake who was definitely only there because Dan was.

“Save me.” Dan groaned as she walked away.

Phil shook his head gently, “You know I can’t.” He began to walk through the sea of princesses.

“Follow me?” He looked back at Dan who reluctantly followed.

“They’re all so desperate it freaks me out.” He complained when they weren’t within earshot of any girls.

Phil nodded in understanding, “They keep asking if I’ve ever gotten to see you get dressed.”

“That’s… That’s just creepy.” Dan muttered and Phil laughed in agreement.

“Your mother is looking at us.” He hissed out the side of his mouth, and offered a cake to an overjoyed girl.

Dan sighed heavily, “Bye.”

~-~-~

Both Dan and Phil glanced up in shock as The King marched into Dan’s bed chambers, his old face worn out and exhausted but plastered with his signature smile.

“I was thinking you boys might want to go out for an ice-cream?” He suggested and Dan grinned as he climbed up from the game of Monopoly he and Phil had been playing.

With a nod Dan turned to Phil and said teasingly, “I can run you bankrupt later, let’s go get ice-cream!”

Phil rolled his eyes but took Dan’s hand to be hefted to his feet, “Sounds great!” He said to The King but turned to Dan mischievously, “But I believe you are the one who's bankrupt currently Daniel,” he poked Dan in the side.

“Well, whoever is bankrupt or not can wait. This King needs a break!” Dan’s father ushered them out of the room impatiently, clearly eager to get out of the palace and into the normal world.

Dan laughed loudly as his father all but tugged him out of the palace doors, one guard accompanied them as usual, despite Phil being “an escort”.

“Where are we going Your Majesty?” Phil asked as they left the huge gates of the palace behind.

The King tutted, “Please Philip if you’re going to use titles at least go with Sir? Your Majesty seems a bit ridiculous for someone who’s taking you out for ice-cream!”

Phil flushed a dark shade of red which shouldn’t have made Dan’s heart ping like it did, “Y-yes Sir,” Phil mumbled.

Dan tried to make his face as neutral as possible as his best friend turned to look at him, “Can we go to the little Italian place you took me when I was six?” Dan pleaded, not meeting Phil’s gaze for fear he would turn as red as Phil currently was.

His Father seemed surprised Dan remembered the little Italian ice cream shop they had only visited once but beamed anyway, “Of course!”

The guard made herself noticed by leaning her head in slightly, “Would you like a car Your Majesty?” The buff woman asked.

The King waved her away, “Nonsense! We can walk! I may be an old royal but I can still use these old things,” he waved his legs around and skipped off as though to prove his point. Dan laughed boisterously, and encouraged Phil to join him in a run as they left behind their duties for the day. Dan’s father danced and walked around in a strange walk that reminded Dan of a chicken, successfully pulling loud giggles out of both boys mouths as they continued to run alongside him.

The ice-cream shop was exactly the same as Dan remembered it, small and brightly coloured. With vintage records that lined the walls, each cut into beautiful shapes and hung to decorate the small room.

The walls were a strange shade of yellow, tinged with a bright blue that reminded Dan of Phil’s eyes, and the ice cream took up most of the space, kept in huge bucket sized containers.

Flavours were lined one after the other, each more exciting than the last. Bubblegum, chocolate fudge, tiramisu, honeycomb, vanilla bean, just to name a few.

Dan instantly ordered a vanilla bean and honeycomb in a large waffle cone.

Phil’s mouth was gaping open, like Dan he rarely left the palace and clearly hadn’t been to an ice-cream store this wonderful.

“What would you like Philip?” The King asked and turned to the fifteen year old boy who looked like he’d never seen real ice-cream before.

Dan grinned at him as Phil continued to splutter in uncertainty, finally he said, “Erm same as Dan.”

Dan nudged him in the side, “Good choice,” He whispered as the worker handed him the ice-cream, too busy to notice he was serving The Prince.

As they sat down in a window booth, the blue sky stretched out like a huge expanse, and licking at their half melted ice-creams they laughed so hard Dan thought he might burst. His father had a way of reminding both him and Phil of the memories that had long since faded away. Like the time Dan had gotten himself stuck in a drying room in a game of ‘Intense Hide and Seek’ as five year old Dan and Phil had named it. He was unable to get out of the warm room Dan had later emerged with an intensely curly fringe and no clothes.

Dan groaned as Phil laughed his head off at him, having completely forgotten about the very disgruntled young Daniel.

“Oi shut up Mr Philip!” Dan poked Phil in the side, “I distinctly remember somebody getting stuck in the top shelf of the pantry with a mouth full of jam biscuits!”

Phil turned a bright shade of red as both Dan and his father burst out laughing at the memory of a very sticky four year old and how on Earth he had gotten up there.

The King shook his head, still booming with laughter, “No no! Now both of you seem to have forgotten about the time…”

16

“Mum! I don’t need another gala! They’re not working!” He pleaded with his mother but to no avail.

She shook her head with a heavy sigh, “No Daniel. You are sixteen without anyone and your father and I are getting old. What happens if something happens to us? I want you to have someone.”

The words stabbed at Dan.

He knew who he wanted.

Who he would never have.

“I know Mum, but maybe we should try something else. I’m still only sixteen, can we take a break?” He begged.

She sighed heavily.

“One more Daniel. Then we’ll stop okay? Please?” Her eyes pleaded with him.

He nodded.

“Okay.”

After the first gala there had been at least ten more. With no more success than the first had been. Eventually Dan gave up, and just purposefully spent time with Phil.

“I hate this.” Dan muttered.

Phil nodded, “I know.” He passed a drink to a princess with a bright smile that made Dan’s heart stutter. “But your mother is worried.”

“I know,” Dan said with a sigh. He smiled politely to a girl they passed, “It’s just not working.”

Phil shrugged, “She’s hoping it might.”

A princess tapped Dan on the shoulder.

He spun around in shock, “Er hi?”

“Hello,” she curtsied, “My name is Princess Cecilia? We’ve met before. I’m James’ sister.”

The name made Phil’s eyebrows shoot up and Dan want to growl.

“Yeah hi,” Dan smiled politely, and wished she would go away as he saw James approaching them.

“Your mother thinks you two would be a good match,” James said in lieu of hello, “I see he’s still here.” James looked at Phil was a sneer.

Phil went bright as a beetroot but made no move to go anywhere, in fact he did the most sarcastic thing imaginable.

“Would you like a glass of wine?” He asked with an innocent smile.

James’ eyes narrowed but he didn’t say anything.

“How are you Daniel?” He said and turned to Dan.

Dan forced an incredibly fake smile and replied, “Fine thanks.”

At that he grabbed Phil’s arm and marched away, calling over his shoulder, “Nice meeting you Cecilia.”

~-~-~

The tears poured out at three am.

He sobbed into his pillow until his eyes were dry and his throat was hoarse.

Why

Why

Why

He didn’t want a girlfriend.

At all.

He wanted the opposite of that.

But aside from anything he didn’t want to be a disappointment. He clutched the blankets to his chest.  

“Phil,” he croaked through the tears.

He didn’t want to press the button, but he did at the same time.

Dan held his pillow up to his face and screamed as loudly as possible. It was mostly muffled by the pillow but Phil managed to hear it anyway. He ran into the room with hair that was messy from sleep and eyes that were wide with worry.

“Dan… what’s wrong?” He gasped and slipped onto the bed beside Dan.  

Phil held Dan to his chest and he sobbed heavily as tears cascaded down his face.

“Oh Dan,” Phil murmured and rubbed Dan’s back gently.

The tears began to slow until Dan was barely crying at all.

“What’s wrong Dan?” Phil asked gently, still rubbing Dan’s back for comfort.

Dan sobbed softly, “There’s so much happening and… and I don’t want a girlfriend but I’ll disappoint my parents… I just… I… don’t want to be a disappointment.”

Phil passed him a box of tissues, “You need a break.”  He said knowingly.

Dan nodded, “Yeah I do…” He dabbed at his eyes, despite the fact that tears were still falling slowly.

“I’ll take you out tomorrow. We’ll tell your mum that you need to go out and I’ll take you to a market nearby!” Phil suggested with an excited grin.

Dan smiled through the tears, “That sounds great.”

Phil nodded and pulled Dan back into a hug, “Then we’ll do it.”

~-~-~

Phil bounded along the path ahead, a bright green shirt and jeans fitted to his body.

“You’re going to love it!” He exclaimed gleefully, before he slowed down to walk next to Dan, “At least I hope you will or this will be awkward.” He laughed.

Dan chuckled, the fresh morning air nipping at any skin it could find. They had dressed Dan in black skinny jeans and a grey-black jumper so that people would be less likely to recognise him. Although as Phil said, there was a high possibility people would know who he was. It was nearby the palace after all.

The market was bustling to say the least.

It was a simple place, a farmers market Phil told him, but the energy was so different to the castle, and Dan loved it. There were stalls set up in a semi circle, ranging from scones to fresh produce. Children played in a petting zoo on the side and parents flitted between shops to find the best bargain.

Phil turned to him with a bright smile, “What do you think?” He asked.

“It’s amazing,” Dan smiled in return.

The weight of his stress momentarily faded away into the hustle bustle of the environment.

“Are you hungry?” Phil asked as they walked along the stores.

Dan’s stomach grumbled in response, “That would be yes.” He laughed.

“The scones are the best you’ll have ever tasted!” Phil exclaimed and pulled Dan along by the arm.

Dan grinned, “Even better than Chef Mari?” He asked with a smirk.

Phil nodded, “Yep!”

As they arrived at the stall the large man gave Phil a knowing smile.

“Phil!” He boomed happily, “How are you my boy?”

Phil grinned, “I’m great Bryan, and you?” He replied.

“I’m splendid! Who’s this lad? Your boyfriend?” Bryan asked with a smile.

Both Dan and Phil’s cheeks flushed red hot at that comment.

“N-no,” Phil stammered, “This is Dan. My best friend.”

Dan waved timidly, “Hi.”

Bryan let out a loud laugh, “I’m just teasing boys! The usual I assume?” He looked at Phil who nodded. When he passed the bag of scones to Phil, Dan could have sworn he heard him whisper, “He would be cute boyfriend though hm?”

But he was positive he was just imagining it.

“My hands are freezing.” Dan complained.

Phil rolled his eyes but linked their hands together. His hands were warm and soft.

“Better?” He asked with a grin.

Dan nodded.

A small three year old boy bumped directly into Dan’s leg and fell onto the ground with an oomph.

“Sorry!” The boy apologised and jumped to his feet.

The mother rushed forward, an apologetic look on her face and Dan recognised her straight away.

“Dan!” She exclaimed.

“Ellen!” He replied as she picked up her little boy.

She sighed happily, “You let your curls out!” She smiled.

He nodded, “Phil convinced me.” He said and inclined his head to his friend beside him.

She beamed at the two of them. Then she noticed their linked hands, “Oh! Are you?” She trailed off as they let go hurriedly.

Dan’s face heated up once again.

“No my hands were cold,” Dan explained. Probably too quickly.

He hoped neither of them picked up on it.

She seemed slightly disappointed.

“Tell me any news ok boys?” She asked before she called out her goodbyes.

Phil smiled at Dan.

“Apparently we’d be a cute couple.” He snickered.

Dan felt his cheeks heat up, little did Phil know that was what he wanted.

“Y-yeah,” he laughed, but it was forced.

Don’t get your hopes up Dan

That night Dan was the happiest he had been since his 16th birthday. Phil and he had ate and laughed at the farmers market until well into the evening. Everyone there seemed to know who Phil was. Only one person aside from Ellen recognised Dan.

It was perfect.

~-~-~

“You are awful at dancing,” the King commented with a smirk as Dan danced around the room and pretended to be some sort of rock star.

He dropped to the floor behind the couch with a squeal of shock and embarrassment, “Dad!” He yelped as he heard his father began to chuckle.

As Dan peeked his head over the back of the couch he watched his father raise his eyebrows at him, “You know you’ll start to have galas again soon? Where you’ll need to dance…” The King trailed off, and allowed Dan to finish the sentence for himself.

Dan stared at him mortified, “But I can’t dance!” He exclaimed as he leapt to his feet, his tired brain finally realising what his father meant.

At that moment Phil walked in with a basket full of Dan’s now clean clothes and several of Dan’s possessions which found their way around the castle.

The King turned on him and Phil nearly dropped his pile, “Y-your Majesty!” He stammered in shock.

The King smirked and Dan recognised the look on his father’s face, he had an idea.

“Philip?” He said, and turned on Dan’s best friend who placed the basket down so he wouldn’t drop it.

He stood up slightly straighter, “Erm yes sir?”

“Do you know how to dance?” The King asked and all of a sudden Dan knew where this was headed, he wanted to curl into a ball and cry.

Phil glanced at Dan in confusion who merely shrugged lightly and tried not to blush too heavily, “No sir,” Phil replied honestly once he realised Dan wasn’t going to help him out at all.

The King nodded as though that was the expected answer, “Good. I’ll book you two a dance lesson, I know Daniel will never be able to learn without a partner and it would be an interesting learning experience for you Philip.”

On that note the King spun on his heel and walked out of the room, leaving behind a very embarassed Dan and a shocked and confused Phil.

~-~-~

He could feel Phil’s heart as it thudded against his chest they were pressed so close together, the dance instructor clapped at them to begin moving their feet in time to the music.

Dan took a deep breath, and tried to distract himself from Phil’s breath he could feel fanning against his face whenever they stepped.

I’m so fucked

He thought as Phil giggled lightly, their feet constantly trodding on each other.

The dance instructor tsked at them whenever they stepped out of time or tripped over feet but Dan couldn’t find himself to care.

Phil’s heart rate picked up as Dan finally looked up from the floor, although that was definitely due to the speed they were moving at, neither of them were exactly what you would call fit.

As Dan made eye contact with Phil and found himself staring into those beautiful blue seas that were Phil’s irises he tripped, which sent both boys flying to the floor in a mass of limbs.

Dan landed on top of Phil, and burst into a fit of giggles as the dance teacher sighed in exasperation.

“You need to focus,” she said simply, although she clearly knew this was a lost case.

Dan nodded in apology and rolled off Phil as his cheeks began to heat up, he hoped Phil would blame it on embarrassment and not the close proximity of their faces.

That was the last thing he needed.

“Try again,” she said calmly.

17

Princess Cecilia curtseyed politely.

“It’s lovely to see you again Dan.” She smiled sweetly.

He smiled back, despite the fact that he was there against his will, “Likewise.”

“I’m very grateful that you chose me to court with.” She sounded genuine.

His intentions were not. In fact it was completely his mother’s idea.

If he had a choice he would be dating Phil.

“No problem. You seem lovely.”

It wasn’t a lie. She did seem lovely, but that didn’t mean that Dan wanted to date her.

He definitely didn’t want to date her.

“When will we have our first outing?” She asked.

The question was understandable but it still made Dan want to cry.

“When will suit you?” He asked politely.

She shrugged delicately, “Tonight?”

No

“Yeah sure,” he heard himself say.

“Great!” She pecked him on the cheek, “See you then!”

Dan wanted to scream.

~-~-~

He was pretty sure that the world was taunting him.

Firstly, he had to go on this date in the first place.

But secondly, the person he wanted to be on a date with was waiting it.

Of course.

Phil smiled at him as he placed the dish in front of Cecilia, “Here you go.” He said to her with one of his beautiful smiles.

“What is it?” She asked, the resemblance to James there and then gone in a second.

Dan felt a stab as Phil’s face dropped, “I don’t know I’m just the waiter.” He placed Dan’s plate in front of Dan.

“That’s alright Phil, there’s a menu beside your arm Cecilia.” Dan said with a tight smile.

He could see that Phil knew it was a fake smile.

“So, when did the servant start living here?” She asked with a slight incline of her head.

Phil came back in at the moment to pour them a glass of lemonade. His face made it clear to Dan that he had heard the question.

“Phil and I grew up together. His father is the King’s Advisor.” Dan explained, emphasising Phil’s name. Cecilia nodded politely, her face unreadable.

“Who’s your best friend?” He asked to make the conversation move.

She waved her hand dismissively, “Her name is Maria, she’s the daughter of a Duke.”

“Oh okay.” He muttered.

“Yours is the servant boy?” She asked.

He nodded, was that not already obvious?

“His name is Phil.” He told her for the second time that evening.

“Sorry.”

He couldn’t tell if she was genuine or not.

They had finished their meal and were sat on the windowsill beside the table.

“I’ve had a great time tonight,” She smiled at him, they were incredibly close.

He forced himself to stay still, to not move as far away as he could.

“Me too.” He smiled gently. Despite the fact that it was a lie.

Then her lips were on his.

He froze against her, eyes wide open.

She didn’t seem to notice, her eyes were closed and her lips were soft.

They pulled apart.

She had slightly tinged red cheeks and he felt awful because he would never feel the same about her.

“Goodnight Daniel.” She kissed his lips once more.

He felt the same way he had the night last year, before Phil took him to the market.

He wanted to scream.

But he didn’t.

~-~-~

“You didn’t look like you liked that,” Phil smirked, as he lounged backwards shirtless on Dan’s bed,

Dan tried not to focus on how stunning his bare chest was.

“No I didn’t like that at all.” Dan replied as he fell onto his bed with a groan.

Phil raised an eyebrow at him, “Is there a reason?”

“Yes, there’s so many reasons.” Dan pouted.

Phil gave him a look to say tell me .

Dan found himself ranting, “I don’t like her brother first of all so I don’t want to be related to her family. Also what if she’s like him? She’s already rude to you! Plus why would I want to have a girlfriend for fucks sake! I can’t use the excuse of being too young now because I’m seventeen! What am I meant to tell my mum now because I can’t tell her the truth that I want a boyfriend.” He realised what he said and halted to a stop.

Phil looked slightly surprised but then he nodded, “You should just tell her.”

“You don’t care?” Dan spluttered.

Phil looked slightly offended, “Why would I care? I’m bi after all.”

Does that mean we have a chance?

Dan wanted to ask.

But he didn’t.

He just smiled and said, “Cool.”

~-~-~

There was a wedding he was attending in three days and he didn’t want to take Cecilia. Luckily for him it turned out she was sick. Unluckily for him he now needed to bring someone and he had no idea who.

“Why don’t I bring you!” Dan yelled out of nowhere.

Phil nearly dropped the iron he held in his hand at the abrupt noise.

“To what?” He asked casually, as he resumed ironing Dan’s shirt.

“The wedding!” Dan exclaimed and leapt to his feet.

Phil stared at him as though he had lost his mind, “I’m a servant, it’s not my place”

“You’re going to be the King’s Advisor! It’s like a business thing or something.”

Dan was probably insane but he didn’t care.

“You’re insane.” Phil said but he a grin covered his face, “But it might work.”

His mother wasn’t happy to say the least.

“It would be a great work opportunity for him Mum.” Dan reminded her and she sighed heavily.

“Ok fine, but only because you don’t have a plus one.” She went back to the files she had on her desk without another word.

He ran away as quickly as possible, before she could change her mind.

~-~-~

The wedding was extravagant and beautiful. Something even more beautiful was Phil in a suit. Dan couldn’t look away from him. The black suit he wore made his eyes pop with bright blue, his navy blue tie complemented him perfectly. Dan wished that he could grab him by it and kiss him on the spot.

But of course he didn’t.

“Thank you for coming Daniel.” The newly wedded princess greeted him, she turned to Phil, “And what is your name?”

Phil smiled awkwardly, “Philip.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you.” She smiled before gliding off.

“Posh people always glide.” Dan muttered.

Phil chuckled, “You don’t glide.”

“Thank god.”

They both laughed loudly which caused a few couples to stare at them strangely.

Dan shoved Phil in the arm playfully, “I’m glad you came with me.” He admitted.

“I’m glad I could come. Three days without you, would’ve been unbearable!” Phil joked.

Dan laughed softly.

A princess curtsied as she passed and they both bowed politely in response. Dan tried not to think about how much he loved Phil acting like a prince.They were hovering awkwardly, and their stomach’s grumbled from lack of food.  Finally a waiter approached them with a tray of sandwich and they both took one gratefully. Dan noticed that Phil gave the waiter a bright smile.

“I know how awkward it is to be that guy. He deserves encouragement,” Phil shrugged.

Dan repressed the want to kiss him right there and then. With his considerate heart and beautiful eyes, it was difficult not too.

“Understandable, I’ll keep that in mind.” Dan replied.

Phil smiled at him.

Suddenly the music changed into a well known waltz tune. The newly-weds started the dance, the bride’s large dress swept around the room. Dan enjoyed watching the beautiful display until everyone began to join in. It was then that Dan and Phil realised they were the only pair that weren’t a couple.

“Do we just-“ Phil mumbled.

“Yeah yeah we could… I mean,” Dan stammered in response.

Phil shrugged, “Should we join or stand or do we erm…” He scratched his head awkwardly.

“Let’s just…”

“We should…”

“Yeah ok…”

They stood to the side and watched.

Dan wanted nothing more than to take his best friend by the hand and join in.

For them to be a couple and it to be fine.

But they didn’t and they weren’t.

Dan sighed gratefully when the music came to an end. The couples split apart with a smile and resumed polite banter.

“That was…” Dan trailed off and left the sentence unfinished.

Phil nodded in agreement.

They both stared at each other before bursting into a fit of laughter.

“Only we could be that awkward.” Dan gasped, doubled over.

A duchess glared at him as though he had personally beheaded her family.

He couldn’t care less.

~-~-~

They’d had many sleepovers in their life, but they hadn’t shared a bed since they were young.

This room had clearly been booked for Dan and Cecilia.

Not Dan and Phil.

Phil’s cheeks were slightly tinged red as he mumbled, “So, which side do you want?”

“Left I guess?” Dan replied, dropping his bag to the floor.

Phil watched him drop it, “I probably should have carried that for you.” He said.

Dan looked up at him in shock, “What? Why?”

“I work for you…” Phil trailed off as Dan shook his head at him.

“Not for this weekend.” Dan told him with a grin, “Technically you’re my plus one!”

This was so much worse than Dan expected, he was hyperaware of every movement Phil made.

He could hear Phil’s light breaths as they puffed out of his lips, he couldn’t help but imagine about what would happen if he rolled over and kissed those lips.

“You need to stop this Dan,” he whispered to himself, and luckily Phil was in too deep of a sleep to hear him.

However he couldn’t make himself want to stop, he really liked Phil and maybe that was okay.

~-~-~

When they arrived home they went to Cecilia.

“Dan!” She exclaimed, her nose red and her eyes puffy.

“I need water.” She snapped at Phil.

Phil’s eyes widened in shock.

“I-I’m off duty right now but you can call-“

She sighed irritably, “I want water. You are a servant aren’t you?”

“Y-yes…” Phil stammered.

“Well then,” she shooed him off.

Dan shot her a dirty look, “No he’s off duty he doesn’t have to get you water.”

Phil shook his head, “Don’t worry, I’ll be back in a second.”

He shot Dan a comforting smile over his shoulder while he walked away.

“I missed you!” Cecilia exclaimed.

Dan shook his head, “You can’t treat people like that.”

She sighed, as though disappointed in him, “He’s a servant Dan, it’s his job.”

“He’s my friend,” Dan walked away as Phil rounded the corner. “Don’t give her the water Phil,” Dan said as he stopped Phil from walking into the room.

~-~-~

Dan officially hated Romeo and Juliet. Phil however seemed entranced, which gave Dan the perfect opportunity to watch him without being caught. He looked so beautiful, sat on the couch beside Dan.

“We would be like Romeo and Juliet if we dated.” Phil said absentmindedly.

Dan froze in shock.

“How so?” He asked with a forced casual air.

Phil shrugged, and turned the page, “Well forbidden love. Prince and servant aren’t exactly ideal.” He continued to read.

Dan was conscious of his mouth hanging open.

How would he usually react?

“So you’d only date me if we were both princes?” Dan joked.

Phil shook his head, still focused on the book, “No I’d date you anyway.”

It was then that he seemed to realise what he said, he froze cheeks so red they could be cherries.

“Are… are you serious?” Dan spluttered.

Phil nodded slowly, eyes still glued to the book, but his eyes were no longer moving.

He finally looked up, “I mean if you want me to be?”

Was this happening?

“Yeah I do.”

They had moved closer.

Dan was very aware of every movement made by either of the boys.

“Promise you’re not playing some awful joke.” Dan said softly, they were so close that Dan could see the specks of yellow in Phil’s eyes.

“I promise. Do you?” Phil whispered, Dan could feel Phil’s breath on his face.

“Yes. You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to kiss you.” Dan said, eyes locked with Phil’s.

Phil laughed gently, it tickled against Dan’s face.

“Go for it.”

They closed the small gap that was left.

Phil’s lips pressed gently against his and Dan’s eyes flickered closed as they touched. It was gentle, as Phil’s lips only just touched his. However Dan was hyperaware of every place their lips were pressed together. Every place their bodies touched.

They were both inexperienced at kissing, Dan knew for a fact this was Phil’s first kiss, he wished it was his but he had been kissed by Cecilia so unfortunately no. It was amazing anyway, the way their lips ghosted against each other. As they mirrored each other's movements, and their noses brushed together.

Phil pushed him away suddenly, and Dan felt his chest constrict. He was an idiot, of course Phil would never want him.

“You’re meant to be falling in love with Cecilia.” Phil gasped, eyes wide with worry as he stared at Dan.

The knot in Dan’s chest evaporated immediately.

He merely rolled his eyes in exasperation, “That was never going to happen.”

“Good,” Phil smiled and he slid forward until their lips collided once again.

This time it was stronger, more forceful. As though Phil was trying to remind himself that Dan was actually kissing him. Their lips were like fire against each other, soft and forceful. The fire didn’t burn him, instead it ignited itself inside of Dan and warmed him from the inside out. He brought his hands to Phil’s chest, bunching his shirt between his fingers.

Phil smiled into the kiss, which caused it to end far before Dan wanted it to.

However when Phil cupped Dan’s face in his hand while he pulled away, Dan couldn’t help but lean into the touch. His hand warm, as it encased Dan’s cheek. Phil smiled at him as though he was the most beautiful person in the world, just the look made Dan blush heavily.

“How long?” Dan asked, in an attempt to take away from the blush on his cheeks.

Somehow Phil seemed to know what he meant, “You were sick when we were fourteen…” He trailed off into a laugh as Dan’s eyes widened. “What about you?”

“My first gala.” Dan admitted.

Phil laughed gently and pressed their lips together softly, “This has taken far too long in that case.” He mumbled, the words tickled against Dan’s lips.

Dan threaded his fingers through Phil’s hair, moving his lips against Phil’s clumsily. Phil didn’t seem to mind, if anything he sighed into the kiss.

Both boys happier than they had ever been.

~-~-~

“I have to work.” Phil mumbled against Dan’s lips.

Dan pouted, sticking out his bottom lip. Phil chuckled as he poked the lip back in, the same way he had been doing since they were young.

“I do still work for you Dan.” He laughed while he stood up.

“But why,” Dan groaned.

Phil rolled his eyes, “Come on you royal pain.” He offered a hand to Dan.

“Really?” Dan narrowed his eyes at him, but took the hand anyway.

“I’ll see you in two hours for your fitting.” Phil smiled at him and kissed him once more before he left.

Dan grumbled as he glanced at the clock.

Fuck

He had promised to help Cecilia with her geography, which was currently ranked in last on what he would like to do.

But he had no choice.

With impressive speed he collected his geography books and ran down the corridors, narrowly missing a maid.

“Sorry!” He called over his shoulder.

~-~-~

Betty, the seamstress, glanced at her watch, “Ok I have an appointment with your father Mister Daniel. I will be back at two pm. Philip, help him pick embroidery.” She instructed, already halfway out of the room.

“You look really nice.” Phil said with a smirk once she had left.

Dan was stripped down to his boxers. A flush crept up his neck and onto his cheeks.

“Th-thanks.” Dan stammered.

Phil cupped Dan’s flaming face in his cool hands.

“You’re blushing,” He told Dan.

Dan’s blush deepened, “I know.”

Phil pressed their lips together gently, light as a feather.

“You’re cute when you’re awkward.” Phil teased, and poked Dan in the dimple.

Dan pecked Phil on the lips, “I’m never awkward!” He gasped in false shock.

Phil rolled his eyes, but didn’t object to the kiss Dan placed on his lips.

Dan smiled against the kiss as Phil pulled him closer. Cold hands trailed along Dan’s bareback.

“We need to pick embroidery.” Phil mumbled.

Dan groaned but pulled away anyway.

They sat too close for best friends, but that was okay because that’s not all they were anymore. Occasionally Phil would turn and plant a kiss to Dan’s cheek, directly on his dimple.

Dan would turn as crimson as the silk beside them. When the light clicked on in the hallway, signalling Betty’s return they slid away from each other.

Dan could still feel the warmth on his side where Phil had been.

~-~-~

Cecilia grumbled something about how much she hated English.

Dan wanted to sigh heavily, they had nothing in common. Yet whenever Dan tried to find a way to tell her that she dismissed him. She seemed to think they had a chance, despite the fact that Dan had begun to reject any date ideas.

“Would you like to go to the museum on Saturday?” She asked as she looked up from her book.

Dan shook his head, “No thank you. Phil and I are going to have a sleepover.”

Her face darkened at the mention of Phil, “Gosh you should just date Phil instead.” She said sourly.

The words hit Dan a little close to home.

“You and I aren’t dating Cecilia.” He said, staring pointedly at his book.

She seemed slightly shocked, “I know…”

“You said I should date Phil instead. ” Dan pointed out.

There was a long pause before she replied with a turned up nose.

“I was just pointing out that you seem to love a servant boy more than a princess.”

Dan clenched his fingers around his book.

“Whatever,” he hissed through clenched teeth.

I definitely do.

~-~-~

“Can I watch?” Phil asked.

Dan looked up from the piano, his hands still rested on the keys, ready to play.

He smiled, “Yeah sure.”

Phil shuffled across the room and sat beside him.

Dan flexed his fingers before he begun to play, they glided across the piano. A soft melody began to form but he found himself slightly distracted by Phil beside him.

“You’re really good.” Phil murmured and pressed his lips against Dan’s temple.

Dan felt his cheeks heat up.

“Thanks,” he replied as the tempo sped up.

Phil rested his head against Dan’s shoulder. It made it harder to play but he couldn’t find it in himself to care.

They laughed as had to lean across the piano to play the next note and bumped into Phil while doing so.

“Oh fuck it!” He exclaimed throwing up his hands, he connected their lips a little too quickly, so their teeth clacked together slightly before it grew soft again. He revelled in the way Phil gasped in shock before he reciprocated. His hands threaded themselves through Dan's hair. Lips heated as they gently pushed and pulled at each other’s. Dan’s hands were cupping Phil’s cheeks, after a couple of days practise they had begun to get the hang of how to kiss. Both learnt they were certainly not against a bit of tongue every now and then.

“I promise I was intending to just watch you play piano.” Phil giggled when they pulled apart.

Dan shrugged, “This is fine by me.”

He slid along the piano bench so that their bodies were pressed up against each other. His body heated up in every place that it touched Phil’s but he didn’t really mind. Phil’s lips were against his again and his head spun. He felt his knees go weak and was relieved they were sitting down. He leaned into Phil anyway, pushing their bodies even closer. Phil licked his lip tentatively and Dan gasped, his lips parted just enough to allow Phil’s tongue access. Dan brushed their tongues together which pushed Phil further along the seat.

They both jumped apart as Phil accidentally leaned on the keys. Mouths swollen and panting slightly.

“I blame that on you!” Phil exclaimed, his eyes glowed in the dimly lit room.

Dan stared at him, “Me? You were the one who did it!” He pointed out.

“If you didn’t make me so dizzy I wouldn’t have slipped backwards,” Phil smirked, as he moved closer again.

“I am a good kisser.” Dan replied with a slightly lopsided grin.

Phil laughed airily, “Care to demonstrate?”

~-~-~

Saturday couldn’t arrive fast enough in Dan’s opinion.

With the amount of time his mother was forcing him to spend with Cecilia, he barely got to see Phil.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?” Cecilia asked, as she pressed a kiss to his lips.

Dan froze, his fists clenched beside his body as her lips touched his. It felt tense and uncomfortable yet Cecilia smiled as she pulled away.

“Er… yeah? Listen I’m not sure I’m okay with kis-”

“Bye Dan!” She exclaimed as she ran towards her brother, James, who had just arrived. Dan seized the opportunity to leave.

He ran into his room where Phil was waiting. Leaping on his boyfriend, they fell onto the bed in a tangle of limbs. Phil pressed their lips together and Dan’s heart soared. His head spun as their lips parted slightly.

“Hi,” Phil said with a small smile.

Dan laughed and pressed their lips together gently, “Hi.” He mumbled while he cuddled into Phil’s chest. The warmth enveloped him as Phil cuddled him closer. He breathed in the scent of cleaning supplies and raspberries.

“I’ve missed you.” Dan whispered, his cheek still pressed up against Phil’s chest. He never wanted to move again, would be happy to spend his whole life there.

Phil chuckled and pulled Dan up so he could see him, “I missed you too, but it’s only been two days.”

Dan rolled his eyes, and leant slightly closer so their lips were connected. It was a gentle kiss, filled with affection and love. Just kissing to remind each other that they were together. They loved each other.

“Idiot.” he mumbled against Phil’s lips.

Phil chuckled, and it made Dan’s stomach flip, “Royal Pain.”

“You want the left again?” Phil asked later into the night. Dan tucked under his chin, head rested against Phil’s chest. They were sharing a bed again, but this time it wasn’t weird. This time they were boyfriends. Dan flushed as Phil pressed a gentle kiss to his hair.

He nodded, “Can’t guarantee I won’t be mostly on your side though.” He added as he snuggled further into Phil.

Phil smiled, it was so bright Dan thought he might faint, “I can deal with that.” He snickered, and kissed Dan on the nose lightly. Dan felt his cheeks turn a bright red and he buried his face in Phil’s neck.

“You’re an idiot.” He mumbled, unable to help the grin that spread across his face.

“You can talk.” Phil chuckled.

~-~-~

Dan groaned as his pillow shifted beneath him. Wait what? He opened his eyes to see Phil smiling down at him, even without glasses he seemed to look at Dan as though he was beautiful. This of course made Dan flush an extreme shade of red.

The morning sun made Phil’s eyes sparkle as they stared at each other. Dan could hardly believe how lucky he had gotten.

“You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen,” Phil mumbled, his words slightly slurred since he’d only just woken up.

“I beg to differ,” Dan teased, and tilted his head so he could kiss Phil on the neck, just below his chin. Phil murmured something unintelligible about cute curls, which Dan assumed was in reference to his hair, as it was usually straightened.

Dan liked Phil when he had only just woken up. His hair was messy and his eyes were slightly glazed over.

“I wasn’t sure you were ever going to wake up,” He murmured and rubbed his eyes with a grin.

Dan smiled as Phil fumbled for his glasses, “Good morning to you too,” He joked, as he poked Phil in the cheek.

“I don’t want to move,” Dan mumbled and clung tighter to Phil.

There was a short pause before Phil replied, “Me neither.” He wrapped his arm around Dan as though it would protect them from the outside world.

If Dan could pause that moment for the rest of his life he would.

But he couldn’t.

They had to move.

Just not yet.

~-~-~

“You look unusually happy.” Cecilia commented as Dan slipped onto the table beside her.

He scoffed, “Wow thanks.”

She rolled her eyes in exasperation, “It’s not a bad thing. Just different. What happened?”

“Nothing just happy I guess…” Dan muttered, despite the fact that he knew exactly why he was happy.

The memory of Phil’s face squished into his pillow made him smile just thinking about it. She furrowed her eyebrows at him in disbelief but didn’t say anything.

He took the moment of silence to start to study for his exams coming up. His laptop turned on slowly, droning as it lit up. While he waited, Cecilia leaned onto his shoulder.

“Did you miss me yesterday?” She asked with a bat of her eyes, long lashes fluttering.

Dan felt his breakfast rise in his throat.

“Of course.” He replied half heartedly.

She smiled, seemingly satisfied with that response and moved away.

“How was your… sleepover?” she said sleepover as though it was a rotten word.

Dan took a deep breath for patience, “It was great. We had a lot of fun.”

“Did the servant sleep on the floor?” She asked innocently. Dan had to physically clench his fingers under the table to not punch her.

Dan glared at her, “ Phil shared my bed actually.”

Her mouth formed a small ‘o’.

“I… okay then.” She smiled icily.

Dan smiled back, but his was genuine.

The sooner she understood the message, the better.

~-~-~

Phil’s hand was warm in his. He couldn’t help but think about how strange it was that they had been dating for a month.

Phil seemed to be on the same train of thought, they often were.

“It’s been a month.” He smiled.

Dan nodded as he watched the red and yellow leaves rustle in the wind.

“It has,” he tugged Phil along, running towards the willow tree at the back of the orchard.

When they were concealed beneath the leaves Phil pulled him close.

“Happy one-month-a-versary!” He announced with a short peck to Dan’s lips.

Dan smiled back at him, “Happy one-month-a-versary.”

They connected their lips softly, hands rested at each other’s waists. Every time Phil kissed him Dan felt like flying. The kiss started slow and gentle, before it grew urgent and passionate. Hands threaded through each other’s hair, lips soft and insistent. Phil pushed Dan against the tree and Dan gasped in shock.

“Wow someone is stronger than they think,” he smirked, as he leant forward to connect their lips again.

Phil chuckled against the kiss but didn’t break them apart.

When they pulled away for air he grinned, “Years of work tend to do that to a person.”

Dan rolled his eyes, and pulled Phil towards him again. Glad that he was leant against a tree as Phil swiped his tongue along his lip gently. Dan felt his knees wobble so that he was practically clinging to Phil in order to remain upright.

Despite Dan being taller he always ended up lower in the kiss, as Phil’s lips made him go weak. He sighed as Phil pushed his head back against the tree, their lips barely broke apart for seconds, which left them both breathless and panting.

“Happy anniversary idiot.” He said as he rested their foreheads together.

“Happy anniversary, you royal pain.” Phil replied, eyes closed as his nose brushed against Dan’s.

Dan leaned forward and pressed their lips together, far more gentle than before, the kiss said everything he couldn’t put into words.

The boys were too caught up in each other’s lips to notice Cecilia as she walked along the path.

She turned red with anger as she saw Dan kissing that ‘servant boy’.

With a flourish she turned around with a plan ticking in her brain.

If she got rid of him, Dan would be hers.

~-~-~

“Where’s your jewel brooch Dan?” His mother asked shrilly, marching into the room with a glare at any of the maids in the room. The maids hurried out as though they might die if they remained any longer. His father entered slowly after her, a reasonably placid expression adorned his face.

Dan looked up in shock, “What? It’s missing?” His jewel brooch was an ancient heirloom, worth millions, if not billions of pounds.

“Yes! It is missing Daniel!” She shrieked, while she looked around the room as though it might be lying there ready to be found. Dan winced at her loud tone.

His father laid a hand on his back, “Julia,” he looked at the queen sternly, “It’s not Dan’s fault. We’ll work it out.” He told her gently, Dan gave his father a small smile of thanks, which was easily returned. However, the jewel itched at the back of Dan’s mind. It was worth a lot of money. If someone stole it…

Dan watched his mother take a deep breath of patience, the same way he did when stressed. She pressed her fingers to her temples and inhaled heavily.

“We need to check the servants.” She said with forced calm and dropped her arms to her side as though they were too heavy to hold up. Dan nodded numbly, still in shock at what had happened.

“We need to check Phil first. He could get to them easiest,” His father looked at him, as though asking if Dan was okay with it.

Dan wanted to say no automatically. However he knew Phil would be fine, there wouldn’t be any danger in it. If he said no he would need a reason, and he wasn’t ready to admit they were dating. He wasn’t sure how long it would take until he would be ready to tell his parents, or at least his mother.

“Okay.”

~-~-~

Phil looked up at the royal family in shock as they approached. His eyes wide and concerned. Dan offered him a reassuring smile and he could see Phil relax slightly.

“Lester, we need to check you for possible stolen property.” Phil’s face slipped as the words left the Queen’s lips. He glanced at Dan as though to check if this was true. One little glance told him that Phil was in a state of shock.

Dan didn’t say anything but he could see Phil understood the little quirk of his lip.

Dan watched as Phil nodded shakily.

A guard member stepped forward and checked him over.

Dan felt incredibly flustered as he watched the guard pat down Phil’s body. He wanted to scream, “That’s my boyfriend, do you mind?”

Of course he didn’t say anything, how could he?

Suddenly both the guard and Phil froze.

With a slow movement a brooch was pulled out of Phil’s pocket.

Dan’s world collapsed.

Phil looked up at him, eyes full of fear.

All Dan felt was pain.

Tears spilled over his face, and flooded down his cheeks.

“I swear I wouldn’t… I don’t know why that’s there- Dan…” Phil stammered, moving towards Dan.

Dan backed away, and shook his head.

“Don’t.” He muttered before he ran off.

Filled with fury, pain and an ache in his chest that wouldn’t go away.

~-~-~

The tears soaked his pillow but Dan wasn’t sure whether he cared or not.

“Dan?” His dad knocked on the door.

He sobbed and let out a croaky, “Come in.”

He could hear his dad walk over to the bed, but he didn’t bother to look up.

“Do you want to talk about it?” He asked and Dan shook his head into the pillow.

His father stroked his back gently and Dan felt his body relax slightly.

“Were you dating Phil?”

Dan sat bolt upright in shock.

“Y-yes.” He muttered and wiped his eyes, there wasn’t any point in lying. His father would never judge him anyway.

He nodded slowly, “Yes, I thought as much.”

“You did?” Dan looked at his father’s calm expression in confusion.

He smiled in amusement but it was saddened, “The way you looked at him Dan. I’m sorry.”

Dan nodded, aware that he was crying again.

Phil had betrayed him.

Was he only dating him to get to the jewels?

What was the point?

He let out a loud sob.

Dan’s father pulled him close and wrapped him into a warm hug.

He shook with pain as he remembered how Phil had done it before.

“I’m so sorry.”

~-~-~

Phil tried to lock eye contact with him. Dan was looking anywhere else in the room but his eyes, those beautiful blue eyes that shone like a crisp morning.

He choked back a sob, he wouldn’t cry again.

“Dan, please sit down.” His mother instructed with a kind smile.

He knew that his father hadn’t told her, but she still knew Phil was his best friend.

Used to be his best friend.

Dan bit his lip to distract himself from the stinging in his eyes.

He also noticed Cecilia was there.

She gave him an apologetic smile, it didn’t quite reach her eyes.

But she had never liked Phil, so that didn’t surprise him.

His mother started the meeting with a clap of her hands.

“Mr Philip Lester, you were found with a jewel of the kingdom. How do you explain yourself.” She asked.

Dan could see Phil visibly swallow heavily, “I would never steal from the kingdom. I’ve been framed I swear.”

His mother furrowed her eyebrows but his father didn’t seem shocked by this presumption.

“Daniel when was the last time you were out of your room without Philip?” He asked Dan.

Dan tried to think about what he had been doing last night. First he had gone and met up with Phil, his eyes stung with tears as he remembered the way Phil had kissed him over the piano. Had he done that to distract Dan?

Phil had left and Dan had continued to practise. He actually managed to get stuff done with Phil gone, although he had missed him, it hurt to remember. “I played piano.” He said, as he stared at Phil. Attempting to keep any traces of sadness out of his eyes.

He must have succeeded as Phil shriveled under his glare.

“Where were you when Daniel was playing piano Lester?” His mother asked with a glare at Phil.

Dan saw Phil’s face blanch and that was all he needed to see.

“I-I was doing the dishes…” he stammered nervously.

Eyes locked with Dan’s but they would occasionally flit away. Dan wondered whether Phil was trying to tell him something, if he was Dan didn’t want to know.

“Ella,” His mother said as she turned to the maid nearby, “Go get Cook please.”

As the words left his mother’s lips Phil turned even paler. Dan didn’t think that was physically possible and yet he watched the colour drain from his face.

“Don’t bother. He wasn’t doing it.” Dan mumbled.

He had learned every expression, memorised every inch of Phil’s smile, he knew every spot of colour. Dan knew that Phil was lying. He was broken from the pain, but he wasn’t going to protect Phil if he didn’t care anymore.

“I wasn’t stealing it.” Phil promised, eyes filled with tears.

“Stealing is a major act and it must be punished accordingly.” His mother said crisply, as she completely ignored Phil.

Cecilia nodded in agreement.

Dan wanted to punch her. She had no right to even be there. To give her opinion, to even smile at Dan. She had no right and Dan wanted to kill her for being right about Phil.

He decided to clench his hands until his fingernails were dug deep into his flesh instead of punching her.

“I guess it depends on you Dan, he is under your command.” His father turned to him.

Phil’s eyes begged with him.

“Dan…” He whispered, “Please. I would never…”

Dan’s eyes stung with tears, “You did Phil. It’s too late now.”

He turned to his parents, “I’d say firing him.”

Dan watched as Phil crumbled under Dan’s words. He cried silently into his hands.

It broke Dan’s heart to watch.

No Dan.

He betrayed you.

~-~-~

Dan woke up on the day exactly two weeks after Phil had stolen Dan’s jewel.

The sun was still in the sky.

Birds still twittered and whistled outside his window.

Yet Dan felt empty.

Phil had once lain beside him in this bed. Their limbs tangled together, the warmth radiated between them as they slept.

The bed didn’t feel the same, he doubted it ever would.

He had considered buying a new bed, new sheets, new everything. Goodness knows his family could afford it.

It didn’t seem right though, the idea of throwing Phil away.

No matter what he had done.

Dan rolled over and buried his head into the pillow beside him with a groan. It still smelled like Phil. Fuck.

He grabbed it and threw it across the room, it hit the wall with a thump and nearly knocked a painting off as it did so.

He automatically regretted it, and leapt to his feet to run and retrieve the pillow that smelled like the boy he missed so much. Tears streamed down his cheeks as he clutched it to his chest and breathed in the scent that he missed so badly. That he hated himself for missing at all.

He got to his feet, placed the pillow on the bed and tried to ignore the way his whole body shook as he let go of one of the many reminders all around him of Phil.

“Why did you do this?” He sobbed, as he clutched his chest to attempt to hold it in place. Phil would never hear him, would never know, but it helped to ask.

Every day since well… Phil well… Dan had gone straight to the bathroom to scrub away the tears, which left his skin red raw as he remembered the way Phil had comforted him when he was sick. All those years ago. Even back then, Phil had always been there.

Dan didn’t know how to function without him.

He had never had to do so before.

Memories of kisses with freshly brushed teeth danced around Dan’s brain until he was back to not being able to breathe.

Fuck he hated this.

~-~-~

He couldn’t go to the orchard, or the pond, or the dining room, or the courtyard. Everywhere Phil stood in the centre of his mind. Dan couldn’t shake him.

The last place he hadn’t tried was the library, so he decided he would go there now.

“Where are you off to Mister Daniel?” Alexis, his personal servant, asked. Dan had told her not to call him that, but to no avail.

He shrugged, “The library.” He said simply.

She smiled at him, “Doing a little tour of the castle aren’t you?” She laughed softly.

Alexis was new to the palace, she had worked in a restaurant nearby for most of her life.

She had soft brown hair which didn’t quite reach her shoulders, as though it wasn’t sure whether to be long or short. Her skin was slightly tanned and she was a reasonably large woman, overall she had a similar look to a giant teddy bear. Dan had discovered very early on that she wasn’t sure how to deal with Dan’s breakdowns, since she barely knew why he was so upset, as Dan hadn’t told her. He assumed no one else had either, although he could never be sure.

She had never met Phil, unlike all the other servants who had practically raised him. Dan wasn’t sure how to tell her what had happened without making the pain worse, he already cried himself to sleep every night. He didn’t need more than that. He had opted to letting the other servants comfort him instead.

Cook had let him sit in the kitchens when it had all gotten to be too much. Most of the servants had known about their relationship due to walking in on a kiss or just guessing so he felt more comfortable with them now that… well now anyway.

“Er... yeah... I guess so. Ok bye.” He hurried off before the situation could grow to be more awkward.

The library it turned out was even worse. Although Dan hadn’t thought that was possible.

Every time he looked at a book he remembered something about Phil.

He had loved horror, Dan thought as he saw a horror book.

As his finger traced over the spine of a blue book Dan felt tears spring to his eyes, they were the exact shade of blue as Phil’s eyes.

He slumped to the floor, and clutched the blue book to his chest.

Maybe if he held it hard enough it would bring Phil back.

He could hold him in his arms again instead.

“Help me,” Dan whispered fingers gripped around the book so tightly he would probably leave dents in the hardback.

“Oh!” He heard a female voice exclaim. A female he did not want to speak to right now, Cecilia. “Dan. Are you alright?” She asked as she slipped down beside him.

Did he look fucking alright?

“M’fine,” he mumbled into his arms, the book still held firmly in his fingers.

“Do you want me to read to you? Take your mind off it?” She asked.

Dan went to say no, but he realised it actually would help.

He shrugged, “Actually yes please.”

She opened her book and begun to read, “If I profane with my unworthiest hand. This holy shrine, the gentle sin is this: my lips, two blushing pilgrims- Dan?”

At the familiar words Dan had begun to sob.

Romeo and Juliet.

Oh fuck.

If nothing else would make Dan crumble to pieces it was this book.

“Stop reading… please,” he gasped between tears.

“He’s not worth this Dan.” She muttered, as she stroked his arm gently.

He stood up and walked away without another word.

Because he was.

He loved him, and he never told him.

~-~-~

“Daniel it has been two weeks. He was nothing more than an awful friend. You will practise piano and that is the end of it.” His mother scolded, her hands on her hips as Dan protested.

With a sigh he nodded, “Yes mother.”

He didn’t give her a chance to reply before he walked away, towards the piano room.

As he sat down on the familiar seat of the piano he felt four different emotions.

First was relief, he had missed the familiar keys beneath his fingers.

Second was sadness, Phil had sat on this seat beside him, he had kissed his cheek and distracted him from what he should be doing.

Third was anger, Phil had taken away everything he loved when he left, piano, reading and mostly himself.

Fourth was happiness as he begun to play, the familiar rhythms on the sheet music floated through the air and calmed him.

Tears streamed down his cheeks endlessly. They dried out his eyes and wet his cheeks.

However for the first time in two weeks, Dan felt close to happy.

~-~-~

It had been four months since Phil had left and Dan didn’t feel better.

If anything he felt slightly worse.

“Daniel! It’s been a while,” A duchess greeted him with a smile. She turned to Cecilia who was on his arm, “And who is this young lady?”

Dan smiled, “Too long!” He faked, “This is my… partner,” He still choked on the word partner.

“I’m Cecilia.” She said with an elegant smile and a small curtsey.

Dan nodded along.

“Well it’s lovely to meet you Cecilia, and to see you Daniel.” The duchess bid them farewell.

He absentmindedly looked around the room for Phil. Before he remembered with a stab that he wasn’t there.

This is why he had avoided parties.

“Dan!” James’ voice greeted from behind.

Cecilia turned around to greet her brother with a hug, Dan was relieved to have her off his arm.

“Where’s your boyfriend?” James asked with a sneer.

The word made Dan want to collapse to the floor in sobs.

Cecilia looked at him worriedly, like she knew something she shouldn’t. Dan didn’t think much of it.

“He’s not around any more.” Dan said with tight lips.

James raised an eyebrow at him but otherwise made no remark.

“What a shame, I was hoping for a wine.” He smirked.

Dan clenched his hands into fists, in an attempt to calm himself down.

He forced a casual shrug, “You’ll have to ask someone else. I need some air.” Cecilia looked like she wanted to follow him but he walked away without another word.

~-~-~

The air was crisp and the wind stung his eyes.

Or maybe they were tears.

He was vaguely aware of someone coming out onto the balcony.

“Dan?” His father asked gently.

Dan nodded and he came and stood beside him.

“It’s been four months. I know it’s hard, but sometimes it doesn’t work out.” The king sighed heavily, and turned to face Dan, who avoided his eye contact.

“It can take longer than four months to get over love.” Dan mumbled.

18

“You told me to take you to my happiest memory,” Dan growled, “So here we are.” He brandished his arm to the small marketplace.

Cecilia sniffed primly, “I didn’t think it would be so… grotty.” She complained.

Dan felt the familiar stab of longing for Phil as she moved to kiss his cheek gently.

“Could we go back?” She asked pleadingly.

He shrugged, “You can if you want. I’m going to stay for a bit.”

She rolled her eyes before striding off towards the castle.

He buried his hands deep into his pockets and tried not to think about how much he missed Phil. The marketplace was a constant reminder of him, yet Dan couldn’t bring himself to leave so quickly.

“Dan!” The scone man, whose name had slipped Dan’s memory exclaimed.

Dan couldn’t tell if he looked happy or nervous.

“Hi! Could I get a fruit scone?” Dan asked as he tried to be casual, and prayed he wouldn’t ask about Phil.

“Of course my boy of course!” The man exclaimed as he handed him a warm scone.

Dan took it gratefully, the warmth wonderful on his icy fingers. He muttered a thank you before he wandered off.

Despite the market being his happy place, he couldn’t think happy thoughts. Cecilia wanted to marry him.

He missed Phil.

Phil.

Fuck that was Phil.

Phil was stood in front of him and Dan felt his stomach constrict.

Everything seemed to slow to a stop as those beautiful blue eyes locked with Dan’s.

“Phil,” he whispered unknowingly.

Dan wanted to run up to him and kiss him.

But he also wanted to scream at him.

Why did you ruin it?

Everything was perfect!

He did neither of those two things.

They merely stood there, and stared at each other for who knows how long. Dan wasn’t sure he would ever be able to move again.

Finally Phil broke the serene trance they had found himself in by mouthing, “Jewels make you look tacky.” His black fringe flew around his face in the wind.

Dan furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. Phil didn’t say anything, he just turned and walked away. Dan could have sworn he had seen tears in his beautiful blue eyes.

Suddenly he remembered

“Jewel cufflinks or silver?” Dan had asked Phil, as he turned to his friend who might have been strewn out across the bed.

He had held up his ruby cufflinks.

Phil had screwed up his nose, “Definitely silver, jewels make you look tacky.”

“Really?” Dan had replied putting down the rubies and picking up the silver.

Phil nodded as he helped Dan attach them to his shirt.

“They look like you’re saying,” Phil had spoken in an over the top british accent that had made Dan laugh, “Woop di doo I’m a prince! I have money and jewels yay!”

Phil had shrugged, “Well then, don’t wear jewels they’re tacky and I hate them.”

“Jewels make you look tacky.”

“Jewels make you look tacky.”

“Jewels make you look tacky.”

Why would he steal a jewel when he hated them?

Had someone framed him?

Why would anyone frame Phil? He would never do anything to hurt anyone.

There was no point…

Names and faces ran through his mind.

His Mother?

Another servant?

James?

Cecilia.

Jesus Christ.

It was the only option that even made sense.

But why?

Dan paced back and forth and chewed on his lip in concentration.

Unless she knew about their relationship it wouldn’t make sense to do anything, there was no reason.

She had always hated Phil but framing him?

What would be the point?

He groaned in frustration and ran a hand through his already messy hair.

Maybe she had found out about them?

Oh fuck.

Dan ran home as fast as he could, his feet pounded on the gravel as he dashed towards the palace.

~-~-~

“YOU FRAMED HIM!” He screamed.

Cecilia jumped so high she nearly fell off the couch she was stretched out on.

“Wha-what are you talking about Dan?” She gasped, and placed a hand over her heart in shock.

His mother glanced up from her book in surprise.

“How could you?” He hissed, “I was so happy. You ruined it all.”

Cecilia turned as white as a sheet.

“I d-don’t know what you mean.” She stammered.

Dan shook his head angrily, “I didn’t even think about it.” He growled, “I should have realised.”

“Daniel?” His mother said gently, “What’s wrong? What do you mean?”

Cecilia was sat on the couch, her shoulders tense and her eyes the size of saucers.

“She framed Phil,” he pointed to her, “and I was so stupid to not see it.”

His mother stood up and approached him cautiously.

“Where has this come from?” She asked.

Dan took a deep breath to calm himself.

“I met Phil in the marketplace.” He started, Cecilia made a move to cut in but Dan held up his hand, “That’s when I remembered. Phil hates jewels.”

Cecilia’s face turned even paler if that was possible, which confirmed Dan’s guesses.

“Why would he steal a jewel when he hated them?” He asked rhetorically. “It doesn’t add up. Why? I was so fucking happy Cecilia…” he trailed off as a sob caught in his throat.

His mother was stood next to him now, a hand rested on his back. The same way his dad did when he needed comfort.

“Did you frame Philip?” She asked Cecilia, a small frown creased into her forehead.

Cecilia nodded as she burst into tears.

“Why?” Dan asked, because how had she known?

She blubbered for a bit before she replied, “I wanted to be your partner Dan,” she sobbed, “I wanted you to love me like you loved him.”

His mother started slightly at that comment but Dan ignored her.

He shook his head in disbelief, “You would ruin my life and happiness, just so I would date you? Because yes you’re right, I loved him.”

I love him he thought to himself.

“I wanted you Dan.” She attempted to redeem herself.

“I was so happy.”

He ran off without another word, anger pulsed through his body like a fire.

~-~-~

With a scream he threw himself onto his bed.

Alexis, his personal servant, darted in with a start.

“Are you alright sir?” She asked nervously.

He sat up so he wouldn’t make her too uncomfortable, she wasn’t the best with emotions, “I’m fine Alexis. I’ve just been an idiot that’s all.”

She nodded slowly, clearly thinking hard about something, “What happened?” She asked and slipped onto a chair beside his bed. It was such an out of the ordinary act, he couldn’t help but be shocked.

“Oh, I didn’t realise something huge and I might have lost my best friend forever.” He explained.

She nodded again, as she wriggled into a more comfortable position, “Tell me everything.”  

Suddenly Dan found himself telling the whole story, starting from when they were ten.

~-~-~

How he had ended up back in the marketplace Dan had no idea.

He just needed to walk, to get out of the palace. Away from his mother’s worried and confused gaze, Cecilia’s false apologies. He needed to get away from it all. So he had ended up in the marketplace, without any purpose to be here. Although he supposed his subconscious would want to see Phil.

“Back again Dan?” The scone man asked, Dan was once again too awkward to ask his name so he just nodded. “Is Phil here?” He asked before he could stop himself.

He instantly regretted it, because the scone man smiled knowingly. As though he knew Dan would ask that.

“I don’t know, but he works in the store across there.” He said as he pointed to a music store across the marketplace. Dan thanked him before he walked over to the store.

It was a cramped tight space, but cozy and warm. Due to it being a market stall there were no proper walls or anything of the sort. Instead sheet music and small instruments lined the outer walls. Dan felt himself drawn to the piano music as soon as he walked into the area. There was a boy behind the counter who looked around Dan’s age, he started as he clearly recognised Dan.

“Your Majesty,” He said before he bowed lowly, Dan nodded at him politely before he continued towards the sheet music table.

“C-can I help you with anything sir?” The boy asked nervously. He glanced around the shop as though it was going to jump out and murder Dan. Which of course made Dan uncomfortable. He looked around for what might be making the boy nervous, but there was nothing.

“Er no I’m alright,” Dan replied with a kind smile. The boy nodded and just as Dan turned back to the music he was looking at he heard someone else speak, a very familiar voice.

“Okay Max you can go on your break… now,” Phil trailed off as Dan looked up at him. He felt his heart stop as he stared into those beautiful blue eyes. He hadn’t gotten to see him properly for so long and doing so now felt like being stabbed. His hair was messy and hurriedly swept into his familiar fringe, his eyes were more blank than Dan had ever seen them.

“I-I’ve been on break for too long anyway.” Phil finished as he turned back to the boy behind the counter.

“Are you sure? I don’t mind if you go for a bit longer.” He said in response, Dan felt awkward as he watched this whole exchange, yet he couldn’t rip his eyes away from Phil. He didn’t have his usual glow, but he seemed to harness all the light from the open market stall anyway.

“No no, go on your break.” Phil shooed the other boy out, before he took his place behind the counter, and stared at the laptop screen intensely, completely ignoring Dan.

“Phil I…” Dan muttered, Phil didn’t look up.

Phil continued to jab at the cashier keys, each time he did it Dan winced at how hard he was pressing.

“I’m sorry.” He finished, Phil continued to ignore him. He may as well have shot him for how much it hurt.

“I’ll leave.” He mumbled and walked out of the store without a second glance.

He didn’t see Phil look up, tears welled up in his eyes. Dan had to physically run to get out of the marketplace before he broke down crying. He collapsed to the floor, each sob burned in his chest.

Knees pressed hard into the gravel path although he could barely feel them past the throbbing in his chest. He was crying so much that he felt like he might cough up a lung, but he couldn’t stop. Every time it began to slow he would remember Phil’s face when he saw Dan. The way his eyes had widened in fear. The way he didn’t look the same as Dan remembered because he was as broken as Dan was.

He wasn’t sure how long he sat there crying, knees hugged to his chest as sobs wracked through his body. However it must have been a reasonably long time because the boy from the shop, who he thought was named Max came back.

“Your Majesty?” Max asked, as he crouched down beside Dan. “Are you alright?”

Dan shook his head, “I’m fine, please leave.” He croaked, the tears almost slowed to a stop from embarrassment.

“Prince Daniel can I just say-” Max started again but Dan cut him off with a glare to the side.

“I said please leave.” He repeated angrily, sobs threatened to escape again, he turned his head back to his knees and buried them.

“Fucking hell your Majesty listen to me.” Dan looked up in shock as the profanity left Max’s lips. The boy was staring at him so intensely, with possibly more anger than Dan himself.

“I could have you locked up for that.” He mumbled, as he wiped his eyes hurriedly.

Max shrugged, “But you won’t.”  

Dan had to fight back a snort of laughter, because of course it was true. He would never lock someone up for swearing in front of him.

“Look, I don’t know much about Phil’s life before he came here. All I know is, he lived in the palace, he fell madly in love with someone, it didn’t work out.” Max looked at him pointedly as Dan’s resolve slipped.

“Today, was the first time I saw any real emotion in his eyes.” He shrugged, “When he said he fell in love with someone I thought it would be a maid or something. Apparently it was the prince.” Max looked at him, and waited for a denial.

He wasn’t going to get one from Dan.

“He hates me.” Dan said, and cringed at the way his voice cracked pathetically.

Max shook his head with a sigh, “He loves you.”

At that he walked away before he seemed to remember something and turned back around, “Keep trying by the way. He deserves it, and I think you do too,” and with those words in the air he left.

Then Dan was alone again, as a few more tears leaked from his eyes, trailing down his face.

Now however, he had hope.

~-~-~

He wasn’t sure why he constantly ended up at the marketplace. Although he assumed it was Phil, as he drew him in like a magnet to metal. Somehow he found himself purchasing a coffee for both him and Phil, despite knowing he didn’t have the bravery to go up to him. He couldn’t be ignored again, it destroyed him in a way he never knew anything could, as it ripped through his soul like the claws of a large animal and scratched and destroyed every ounce of happiness he might have had left.

Yet he had bought a coffee for Phil, with no way to give it to him.

Luckily, or unluckily, Dan still wasn’t sure, Phil was on his break, which meant Dan only had to deal with seeing Max, who admittedly shot him a weird look as he held up the coffee.

“For Phil,” Dan explained, as he passed the cup to Max over the counter.

The boy stayed silent for a long time, just staring at Dan as though he had gone insane, before he shrugged.

“Leave a note on the cup, something so he’ll know it’s from you.” He said with a sly smile, before he left the cup of coffee with a pen and gave Dan a bit of privacy to write the note. Dan nodded uselessly, the longer he took hanging around the stall, the more likely Phil would come back. Then Dan would have to go home and cry again after being ignored. Instead he uncapped the pen, and ignored the way his hand shook slightly as he scribbled a note.

As he ran away he bumped into Phil, who stared after him in shock. Dan felt pins and needles explode where they touched, and he wished he could kiss Phil again. Wished Phil was his and he was Phil’s.

For now, a note would have to do.

Dear Romeo,

I’m so sorry

I was wrong

From your Juliet

~-~-~

He scribbled notes like a madman, Phil had distracted him from the upcoming talks he had to do. As his coronation became a foreseeable future, much of Dan’s time was taken up learning the things he hadn’t yet been taught. A hand laid itself on his back, warm and comforting.

Dan looked up at his father and smiled, “Cramming for the speech?” The King asked as he slipped into the chair beside Dan.

He nodded, “Yeah.” He mumbled, too busy scribbling down on cue cards to properly talk.

“Dan?” His father mumbled, and Dan looked up from his laptop he was currently reading off. “Your mother told me about… Cecilia.” He said calmly.

Dan felt his lunch rise in his throat at her name. However he managed a tight lipped smile. “What about her? The fact that she stabbed me in the back or something else?” He asked sarcastically.

His father looked at him worriedly, “Dan…”

“I’m fine.” Dan cut him off.

He watched his father debate whether or not he should roll his eyes at Dan, before he seemed to decide that it would be fine. He gave Dan a heavy eye roll before he responded, “I’m the King, my servants tell me when my son is crying his eyes out and screaming until his voice is hoarse.”

Dan swallowed heavily at that remark, after he saw Phil in the marketplace he had cried until he didn’t think he had any more liquid left in his body and screamed until it hurt to breathe, as though it would bring Phil back, as though he could fix everything. Alexis had just let him be as she didn’t to be the person to disturb him.

For that Dan was very grateful.

“Okay so not completely fine.” He admitted, and avoided his father’s kind gaze.

However there was only so much silence he could take before he was forced to look up. The King was simply watching him, as he waited for an explanation.

“I saw Phil in the marketplace, understandably he was pissed and wouldn’t talk to me. He ignored me and I-I feel awful.” Dan muttered at an incredibly fast pace.

He had barely finished the sentence before soft arms were being wrapped around him. Dan sunk into the embrace.

“You’re going to be ok,” His father whispered.

Dan wasn’t sure whether to believe him or not.

~-~-~

He stood in the safety of a stall, hidden from sight where Phil wouldn’t be able to notice him. This wasn’t the first time this week that Dan had snuck into the marketplace to watch Phil, occasionally he would try to work up the courage to talk to him.

He never did though.

“Do you want anything sir?” The lady in the stall asked and he shook his head hurriedly, before he moved into the next stall instead.  

From behind a stack of books Dan peered over to Phil. He was talking to a customer enthusiastically, his beautiful smile not as wide as usual. Yet it was still there. Just seeing it made Dan’s tense shoulders relax and his stomach flip. He needed to stop watching Phil, while being here made him feel happy, tonight he would be left to sob into his pillow. As he wished he hadn’t been an idiot, hadn’t practically thrown away the only person he loved.

For now though, he couldn’t force himself to leave.

Couldn’t look away from those beautiful blue eyes, the closest Dan had seen to happy since… since they were together. He could see what Max meant, Phil’s emotions weren’t as strong as they used to be. His smile was only half there, his eyes didn’t sparkle with happiness the way they used to. He just didn’t look as alive.

That was Dan’s fault.

Another stall owner looked about ready to approach him, he took that as the cue to leave.

As he left the store and as Phil saw him his eyes that Dan loved so much widened in shock.

Dan ran away, as fast as he could.

~-~-~

He was scrolling through Tumblr, as he took a much needed break from the endless responsibilities when Cecilia tapped his shoulder. He didn’t even bother to hide the growl that came from his throat at the contact. She backed away slightly under his murderous gaze, but mostly stood her ground.

“I came to apologise but you can’t really blame me?” She said with a heavy sigh, Dan stared at her in shock. She couldn’t be serious?

Yet she stood there, face genuinely serious.  

He stood up, unable to keep the anger out of his eyes.

Body quaking with anger, “I can’t really blame you?” He hissed. She shrunk away as he loomed over her, his tall height a perfect angle to terrify her.

“Then who do I blame Cecilia?” He said her name as though it tasted foul in his mouth, which wasn’t entirely false.

“It w-wouldn’t have w-w-worked out. Servants can’t d-d-d-date princes.” She stammered, trembling in front of him.

Dan attempted to reassemble his face so it was less furious, however he couldn’t do it.

“It would have worked out. We loved each other, anything else could have been sorted out. You ruined it Cecilia, not us.” He leveled his glare with hers, and was met with frightened green eyes that flickered in shock as he added, “Leave me alone, I don’t want to speak to you. Not now, not ever.”

She stammered out some unintelligible answer before dashing away. Dan watched her go with a satisfied smile. He knew that there was no way he could focus on Tumblr now that his mind was on Phil, so he decided to head to the marketplace. When he checked the time on his computer he grinned, Phil would be working now. He had been so many times now, that he had memorised Phil’s schedule. He wasn’t sure whether what he was doing was stalkerish, but it hadn’t been intentional. Besides Max had told him most of it anyway. He slammed his laptop closed, deciding that the servants could put it away, he left straight for the marketplace.

~-~-~

As he ducked straight into a fresh produce stall as he saw Phil, Dan couldn’t help but grin. His hair was slightly messy, he had clearly been having a rough day. Dan must have gotten the timetable wrong as Phil was clearly about to take a break. He watched as he headed over to the scone stall, running a hand absentmindedly through his already messy fringe. Dan would have been lying if he said his heart didn’t jump at that small movement.

Everything Phil did made his heart jump, apparently it did the same for a skinny girl with blonde hair who Dan could never compete with. He felt his heart thump for an entirely different reason as she approached Phil with a plastered smile.

Phil seemed shocked to see her, but not altogether upset. He probably knew her, she was probably his girlfriend for all Dan knew. Phil was bisexual after all, he had told Dan that all along. However it stung like a wasp, when she took him by the bicep, and led him away from a very surprised scone man. Dan would have to learn his name again, he felt awful. They chatted seemingly happily, although Dan was slightly too far away to hear exactly what they were saying. He considered moving closer, but since he was currently toeing the line of stalker he decided against it.

Instead he opted to listen to Phil laugh from afar. It wasn’t the same beautiful laugh Dan had grown to love. It wasn’t the one where he stuck his tongue out and giggled loudly, but a lot had changed. He wouldn’t have been shocked to hear that Phil’s laugh had as well.

He swallowed his jealousy as she laid a hand on Phil’s heart, the world seemed to rock. She smiled up at him, and whispered something in Phil’s ear which he couldn’t hear.

He shouldn’t care, should have known Phil would have moved on.

They weren’t together any more.

Still, he was being stabbed repetitively in the chest every time the girl smiled at Phil.

The same Phil, Dan was desperately head over heels for.

He actually choked on a bit of vomit when she kissed him on the cheek gently.

Dan had hoped however that he would push her away, not lay his hand over hers. Phil smiled gently at the girl and said something to her.

Tears dislodged themselves from his eyes.

He tried to scream at himself in his mind, What were you expecting to happen? Of course he’s moved on! Why would you get your hopes up?”

It wouldn’t work though, it didn’t stop the tears. Or the feeling of his hopes being ripped to shreds.

Dan ran as fast as he could, his blood pumped in his ears, and tears streamed down his face.

He could have sworn he heard his name being called after him.

However it was just his mind, as it tortured him some more. Pretending Phil would ever want him after what Dan put him through.

A cruel kind of torture.

~-~-~

Phil wiped his sweaty fringe out of his eyes, aware that it was probably a mess. He caught himself looking around for Dan and kicked himself.

“No Phil. He hurt you.” He tried to tell himself, even though he knew it was useless.

He was still madly in love with Dan, and it would be a lie if he told himself otherwise.

Max smiled at him gently as he returned from his break, “I’ll take over. Go get a scone or something.” He said and nudged Phil out of the store.

Usually Phil would have argued, but they had been so busy today. He took the break with open arms. He ducked out of the music stand he worked in and crossed the marketplace.

His hair was falling in his eyes so he ran a hand through it without thought. That would have made it even more knotted and messy than before, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care.

Not truly at least.

He smiled widely at Bryan as he approached, he knew it didn’t quite reach his eyes. He didn’t think Max had noticed how fake his smiles were as they had only met when Phil was broken. Bryan however, knew it all, and always gave Phil a worried smile.

Hence why Phil usually avoided this particular stall, despite the fact that he loved the scones and Bryan to pieces, “Er… the usual please.” He stammered.

Bryan didn’t say anything, for once his loud voice quiet as he surveyed Phil worriedly. He wasn’t sure what he would prefer, endless “Are you okay?” or silence.

However this thought was interrupted by a tap on his shoulder as he took his scones. He thanked Bryan before he turned around, to be faced with a girl who smiled at him in a way that made Phil feel uncomfortable.

Her blonde hair was tied into a ponytail and her eyes bored into his soul. He felt strangely defensive, had to physically bite his tongue to stop himself from saying “I have a boyfriend.”

Which he didn’t.

She took his arm by the bicep and dragged him away from the stand, and introduced herself while they walked.

“I’m Olivia,” she said in a surprisingly deep voice, “But you can call me Liv!” She added with a giggle.

Phil forced a laugh, he was polite after all. No harm could be done in being nice to her. So he smiled.

“Phil.” He replied. She was much shorter than him so he had to look down to lock eye contact. Her eyes were a striking brown, although as he looked into them all he could think was Dan Dan Dan .

They weren’t as beautiful as Dan’s eyes, his were a warm chestnut, hers a deep muddy shade.

She leaned close to whisper in his ear, he struggled not to grimace as her breath tickled his neck, “You’re very handsome, Phil.” She purred his name.

He felt bile rise in his throat, sure he liked girls but this wasn’t something he wanted.

Not when he couldn’t seem to get over Dan.

Especially not after Dan had turned up at the market eight months after their breakup.

No, he wasn’t enjoying this at all.

“Th-thanks,” he muttered, and laid a hand on her arm to dislodge her. Apparently she got the wrong message as she smiled and kissed him on the cheek. Phil froze in shock, she had kissed him.

Her hand was still on his chest, although he wasn’t totally sure when it had been put there. He laid his hand over hers and begun to take it off, noticing that she had bunched his t-shirt in her grasp.

As if the situation wasn’t bad enough, he heard a choked sob from not to far away.

His head whipped around to be met with Dan, tears streaming down his face. He ran away at a speed Phil didn’t even know Dan could achieve.

He shoved the girl away and started to run after him, “Dan!” He screamed after him.

The other boy however either didn’t hear, or didn’t care.

~-~-~

Dan felt like he was rotating in a fucking loop.

He felt happier.

He got hurt.

Sobbing until he couldn’t breathe.

Phil fixed him again.

He felt happier.

Neverending, constant.

Somehow he always ended up in his lounge room or on his bed, sobbing until he couldn’t breathe.

In these times, Alexis was amazing at comforting him.

She wouldn’t force him to talk, instead she sat beside him and let him cry. If he wanted to talk, scream, throw things. She would listen, give him a pillow to scream into and pick up broken vases or whatever else he had thrown.

Right now, he was just crying. Leant heavily on her shoulder, he let the tears wrack through his body, they spilt over his cheeks and onto her cardigan. Alexis didn’t seem to mind, which was a relief to Dan.

“Do you want to talk about it?” She asked gently, while she patted his knee in consolation. He nodded and sat up a bit straighter to look into her eyes.

“Am I bugging you yet?” He asked with a slightly watery smirk.

She just rolled her eyes, “What happened to make you a blubbering mess again?”

“A g-girl,” As he begun to tell her he choked on his words. She nodded, seeming to have all she needed to know.

“Oh Mister Daniel.” She murmured, and pulled him against her chest again. He sobbed quietly and remembered how Phil had placed his hand on the girl’s. How she had kissed him lightly on the cheek.

He was shaking from the pain the memories brought.

The way Phil had smiled down at the girl.

Stab to the chest.

He had grabbed her arm gently.

Stab to the stomach.

She had kissed him on the cheek.

Stab straight to the heart.

Sobs erupted from him as he clung to Alexis desperately.

If she minded she never told him so.

~-~-~

Dan was sobbing into his pillow until it was practically soaked through when Alexis returned.

She opened the blinds with a snap, causing bright light to flood the room.

“Up you get Prince Daniel.” She said while she bustled around his room.

He almost felt embarrassed about the state, before he remembered it was her job to clean up his mess. She had also listened to him cry for a good hour a couple of days ago. Still, the empty crisp packets and tissues were rather embarrassing no matter who was seeing it.

He didn’t say anything, but chose instead to groan into the pillow.

“You can’t stay here forever,” she scolded him.

He shook his head into the pillow, “You mistake my skills.”

Tears still flowed steadily down his face, as they had been for the last couple of days.

“Philip isn’t dating anyone.”

At this news Dan started and emerged from his pillow.

“Wh-what?” He mumbled and swiped away the tears as quickly as possible, although he was sure Alexis saw them.

She rolled her eyes at him in a motherly way, “My daughter is best friends with Max.” she explained, “he says that Mr Philip is completely and utterly single.”

She continued scooping his mess into a rubbish bag, “This news didn’t surprise Cook Martha at all, in her words you were both head over heels for each other .”

A blush crept up Dan’s neck and onto his face as she said that.

“So up! You’re going to the market and you are going to apologise to Mr Philip in person.” She shoved him off the bed.

He grumbled slightly but other than that didn’t argue, his brain was more focused on the fact that Phil didn’t have a girlfriend.

He was still single.

Not that Dan had any right to be happy about that, but he couldn’t deny the way his heart beat a little bit faster.

~-~-~

Dan felt his legs slow involuntarily as Phil came into view, he was working on the stand as usual. A piece of black hair fell in front of his eyes, his hands sorted through sheet music gently.

He looked so peaceful that Dan didn’t want to disturb him.

Didn’t want to see those beautiful blue eyes harden as Dan came into view, the eyes that used to soften when they kissed. However Phil decided that for him by looking up, their eyes met and Dan watched as they didn’t harden, but instead widened.

“Dan?” He asked gently and Dan did all he could not to run over to him.

“Phil…” he mumbled as he entered the stall, every thought he had ever had leaving him as he stared over at the boy he loved with all his heart, “I’m so sorry…”

Phil shifted uncomfortably, his eyes pooled with tears, “It was my home Dan… do you know how hard it is to be kicked out of your own home by the person you love most?”

Dan winced at the words, his own tears springing to his eyes. He felt himself nod, Phil stared at him, confused. Eyebrows furrowed behind his glasses, God, Dan loved his glasses.

“Yes, I do, because to me you were home and I thought you had kicked me out. I thought you didn’t care. I was so terrified and sad that I didn’t even think…”

He trailed off as Phil’s lips tugged into a small hesitant smile, “I’ve missed you.” He mumbled.

Dan found himself moving forward, he wrapped his arms around a tense Phil, “I’ve missed you too.” He whispered into Phil’s shoulder, who slowly relaxed in his arms.

A tear etched it’s way down Dan’s cheek as Phil’s arms wrapped around him, unsure but still there.

~-~-~

Dan wasn’t sure how he had ended up in the servant’s quarters in his pajamas. It was nearing three am but an idea had forced Dan out of bed. He shivered in the early morning iciness, voices could be heard from the night staff as they bustled around, making food and cleaning dishes. The Head of Staff’s office loomed at the end of the corridor, he shouldn’t feel scared of a door, he was the prince for crying out loud.

However he couldn’t deny the way his stomach twisted at the prospect of the awkward questions, of why he could think this was a good idea. He wrung his hands tightly, and drew his dressing gown tight around his body as he shook from the cold. This was for Phil, after all Dan had done, Phil deserved it.

He raised his hand and rapped on the door without another thought. There was a pause of silence where Dan held his breath then.

“Who’s knocking at this time of night?” Muttered the old man Dan only knew as Head of Staff.

The door creaked open and the man started at the sight of Dan.

“Your Highness!” He bowed, his nose nearly brushed the floor in his haste to be polite. “What brings you here at this hour sir?” He asked and Dan took a deep breath. This was what he had been worried about.

“Well, I actually have someone I want you to hire. Or rehire per say. Can I come in?” He mumbled quickly, he knew his words were a strange string in his sleep deprived state but he didn’t care.

The Head of Staff furrowed his eyebrows in confusion but nodded anyway, “Come on in,” he opened the door wide for Dan. Dan hurried in, the heater warmed his toes as he stepped onto the carpet.

“Thank you.” He said as the Head of Staff offered the plush armchair across from his desk.

The office was large, nearly the size of Dan’s bedroom. A huge filing cabinet towered on the left wall, timetables were plastered all over the remaining wall space, it reminded Dan of a criminal investigator in a tv show. Although these timetables were far less exciting than that he supposed. The sky was dark outside the small window above the desk and Dan yawned which reminded him of how late it was.

“How can I help you Your Majesty?” The man asked, and glanced nervously at Dan.

After yawning again Dan replied, “I would like you to rehire Phil Lester please.”

There was a long silence, where the Head of Staff stared at him as though he had gone mad. Dan stared back, despite exhaustion starting to hit him he was determined to fix this for Phil.

“Sir…” The head of staff began once he realised Dan was completely serious, “He stole from the royal family. Which is a huge crime, I cannot…” He trailed off at Dan’s steely gaze.

He was glad he could still look intimidating in his half asleep state, “Phil didn’t steal the jewel, he was framed. Please rehire him immediately.” Dan ordered.

Once again silence followed his words before the head of staff opened his laptop with a quiet sigh, “I will not be able to make him your personal assistant once again. He will be an ordinary cleaner,” he looked at Dan over his glasses to see if this was approved of.

Dan nodded, “That’s fine.” The Head of Staff paused for a moment, looking at Dan worriedly, “Sir. I don’t mean to pry but are you sure this isn’t because of you know…” At Dan’s embarrassed denial he nodded and continued.

When Dan left, his feet dragged along the carpet from exhaustion but he felt a tingle of pride in himself. Finally, for the first time in eight months he had done something right.

~-~-~

Phil was working the shop again, Dan felt awful as he begun to realise how much Phil had to work in order to maintain himself. He seemed to constantly be in the shop. Dan stood there and watched for a bit, debating how to go up and approach him. It stabbed at him to see how broken Phil still looked. While strangers may see him as peaceful, Dan could see the tiny crease between his eyebrows, the way his shoulders never quite seemed relaxed, how his fingers gripped the sheet music slightly too tightly. It seemed that he was worried it would blow away despite the distinct lack of wind. Even a breeze was absent from the air, it seemed spring had finally decided to arrive.

“Dan?” He heard his name being called out and his head snapped upwards to Phil’s face, who was staring at him in confusion. It didn’t slip Dan’s notice the way Phil’s voice cracked slightly when he said Dan’s name.

“Prince Daniel,” Max nodded, barely glancing up at Dan from his work. He did however glance at Phil somewhat nervously. Dan smiled at him as genuinely as he could, a wave of nervousness had suddenly overtook him. When he planned to come and tell Phil he hadn’t felt this scared. Now however he was beginning to question whether this was a good idea or not.

Maybe Phil liked his new job better? Maybe he never wanted to see Dan again. Dan wouldn’t blame him if that was the case.

Phil stood there and watched as Dan smiled half-heartedly, he shoved away the little burst of concern he felt at Dan’s nervous expression. He shouldn’t be able to tell from a tiny flicker of Dan’s smile that the prince was concerned. However, he could, and there was nothing he could do about it.

“Is there a reason you’re here D-Prince Daniel?” he followed Max’s example in calling Dan by his true title but he didn’t miss the small flinch Dan gave in response.

“Er... yes actually, I have news,” Dan mumbled.

Phil’s stomach dropped.

He should have known this would happen, Dan was bound to move on at some point. Phil himself was meant to have moved on. It didn’t feel like he had, at this point, when he realised Dan had finally found someone. He should feel grateful that Dan had even thought to come to him, but his world was crumbling anyway.

“Okay,” he managed to blurt out without a crack in his voice, which made him feel very proud.

Dan’s eyes narrowed slightly in confusion, it was such a small change that Phil knew Max probably wouldn’t even notice it.

“So I… well it’s just… ugh,” Dan burrowed his head in his hands, “This is so much harder than I thought it would be,” Phil heard him mumble into them. Max looked at him in confusion, Phil shrugged. Although he hated to admit it Dan’s awkwardness had always been Phil’s favourite part of him. Just seeing him as he bumbled and stammered over words the same as usual, made him want to cuddle him into his arms and press a kiss to his forehead. He mentally slapped himself, Dan had found someone else. He was meant to be past this.

“It’s fine, I get it.” Phil said softly, Dan’s head snapped up in confusion.

“Phil that makes zero sense,” he replied, and stared at Phil as though he had gone insane. He turned to Max, who wore a similar expression of confusion. Dan continued to stare at him, and seemed to wait for an explanation, Phil resisted the urge to look into Dan’s eyes. He knew no matter how much he didn’t want to, he would end up mesmerised by the rich deep brown of them.

Dan stood there waiting for Phil to explain himself, he could see Phil’s eyes dart around, as they looked anywhere but Dan’s own eyes. What Phil had said made no sense, so clearly he had misunderstood Dan, but Dan wanted to know what he meant.

So he waited.

Eventually Phil clearly broke under the silence muttering, “I thought you were telling me you were engag-” he broke off but had said enough for Dan to understand. He shook his head hurriedly, careful not to admit anything as he wasn’t sure how comfortable Phil would be with his true feelings. That he couldn’t imagine himself with anyone but Phil. The boy who would probably never trust him again, and rightfully so.

“No, it’s nothing like that. Much happier at least I hope it will be happier, you might hate it actually but that would be understandable,” he knew he was rambling again but couldn’t help it.

He stopped however when Phil held up his hands to stop him, the smallest smile tugged at the corners of his lips, “What is it?” He asked.

Dan felt his heart surge with want, he wanted to be able to kiss that smile like he used to. To wrap his arms around Phil because he just could. He pushed those thoughts to the farthest corner of his mind he bit his lip, “I got your job back at the castle. Or at least a job, not my p-personal assistant anymore.”

He watched as Phil’s mouth dropped open, forming the smallest oval possible. His bright blue eyes locked with Dan’s as he checked to see if Dan was serious.

“Please don’t mess with me,” Phil whispered, voice barely even loud enough to distinguish but Dan heard it anyway.

He shook his head softly, a small smile crept onto his face, “I’m not fucking with you. I went and spoke to the Head of Staff, you’ve been rehired.”

There was a pause, where Dan watched Phil’s eyes blink rapidly.

“Th-thank you so much,” he choked.

Dan grinned, but it felt slightly forced, he knew Phil was holding back his emotions. Probably trying not to be too vulnerable in front of Dan. Dan could understand that, it hurt, but he understood.

Max stared at them, mouth wide in shock. Dan turned to him, “I’m sorry if this is annoying for you or…” but he trailed off as Max shook his head harshly.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me! Sorry your Highness but Phil please tell me you’re doing this!” He rounded on Phil who was gaping at him, tears glistened in his eyes.

Dan felt his heart hammer as he saw the wide grin on Phil’s face, every time Dan had come and watched Phil he hadn’t seen him this happy.

It was the old Phil, the Phil he loved and sorely missed.

“Of course I’m doing it Max I… thank you Dan,” he turned to Dan and his arms jumped outwards slightly before they closed again.

It was clear his first intention was to hug Dan before he remembered that he didn’t want to. Dan barely cared, his heart leapt at the fact that Phil had returned to his first name.

“You’re welcome,” he grinned as Phil leapt around eagerly.

~-~-~

Dan hated how awkward it was when they saw each other, he hated the way he felt a stab of pain every time Phil avoided eye contact.

That didn’t stop him from trying though.

He “somehow” found himself in the servants quarters when he knew Phil would be there, in the hopes of teasing some conversation out of him. He invited him to fittings, classes anything possible. Phil declined them all, but Alexis wouldn’t get off his back about continuing to try. She wouldn’t tell him why but he heard servants whisper about the boy crying in the toilets. He wasn’t dumb enough not to know who it was.

So when he made his way down to the servant quarters and found Phil washing up he took the opportunity.

“Hi,” he greeted Phil as he marched over and sat on the bench beside the clean up station. Servants jumped out of his way.

Phil glanced up at him, eyes wide in shock, “Dan? What are you doing down here?” He asked and continued to scrub at a plate. Dan shrugged, trying to seem nonchalant and not at all like he’d come down to see Phil, “Thought I’d see what you were up to since I was bored.” He swung his legs back and forth on the counter.

He enjoyed the way Phil’s mouth quirked into a smirk despite himself, “You’re unbelievable,” he shook his head, and turned back to the washing up. Dan laughed softly, he loved the way Phil’s eyes were sharpened with focus. He could see that they still weren’t as comfortable as they used to be but it was a step forward that Phil hadn’t closed off from Dan yet and he would take it.

“Remember when we came in here and filled up water balloons?” He prompted, feeling his muscles tingle as Phil started to giggle.

“And you burst one all over yourself?” He laughed, Dan watched with an amused grin on his face. Unable to stop himself from laughing too, Phil’s laugh was contagious.

“Hey! I remember you accidentally threw one at my head!” He retorted.

Phil snorted, “Accidentally?” He waggled his eyebrows and Dan gasped in mock horror, throwing his hand to his chest as though mortally betrayed.

“How could you!” He gasped and splashed Phil lightly with the soapy water.

Phil snickered before he did the same.

Dan sighed in contentment, Phil’s guard wasn’t all the way down, but he was laughing and mostly relaxed with Dan. Just the idea of Phil being able to talk to him without any walls built up again made Dan bubble with happiness.

~-~-~

The horse felt extremely uncomfortable beneath him, he knew it didn’t trust him and he doubted it ever would. Horse riding was Dan’s least favourite activity. He hated having to get up on a giant animal that definitely didn’t like him and trot around for an hour. However his mother insisted, and it was the one thing his father fully agreed on.

“You ready to ride?” The stable boy asked and glanced up at Dan nervously before he remembered who Dan was, “Your Highness?” He added, his voice shook nervously.

Sam, his name was and Dan was pretty sure he was only eight years old, the poor boy was terrified of Dan for some unknown reason but Dan liked him.

“Yep,” he replied stiffly, still terrified from being so high up on an animal who he didn’t trust, plus he doubted the horse trusted him. “Open the doors Sam,” he added politely.

Sam nodded, his blond hair bobbed on his head as he opened the huge oak doors.

“Thank you!” Dan called out as he began to trot out the doors, arms clung around the large horse, Mabel, for dear life.

Why horse riding was a princely skill he couldn’t understand, but he hated it. Had done since he and Phil were only young boys.

“Ok,” he muttered to himself, and clicked his tongue to urge the horse forward. She obeyed his order but far too quickly for his liking.

“Fuck!” He screamed as they raced forwards, he felt himself slip out of the saddle and he realised he hadn’t tucked his feet into the stirrups too late.

In that moment Dan was certain he was going to die as he flew over the front of Mabel. He shielded his face as she leapt over him.

“Holy fuck!” He shrieked while she raced away, “Fuck you, fuck you you fucking fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.” He shook from adrenaline, lying on the ground.

His arms and legs ached all over from the fall, but as he flexed them he couldn’t seem to find anything that was broken or too badly injured. Sam raced out of the stable like a flurry of nervous energy.

“Oh my goodness! Your Highness! Prince Daniel! Are you alright?” He squeaked in terror as he bounded over to where Dan was lying on the ground, still quivering with fear.

At Sam’s fear though he sat up and attempted to ignore his sore arms, “I’m fine Sam,” he mumbled but the small boy shook his head nervously.

“No sir! Don’t get up! I’m going to go and get help okay sir? You might be badly hurt!” He explained, and jumped around in fear, at Dan’s nod he rushed off, small limbs flailing as he sped across the racing track.

Dan groaned and flopped back onto the hard track with a wince, everywhere ached.

Luckily he had seemed to miss all of the danger spots on his body, his pelvis, spine, ribs, head and even legs were still fine. That reassured him slightly, but the constant pain in his arms and legs made him want to cry. There was a small amount of blood resting on the surface, from where he had scraped along the ground. Mixed with dried mud and dirt he looked an utter wreck.

“He’s right over here!” He heard Sam’s nervous voice echo through the air as he ran towards Dan. “Prince Daniel!” He exclaimed once they were in talking distance of Dan, “I got help.”

He sat up his eyes squeezed shut to deal with the pain from his sore arms, the huge scrape along his right would sting that was for sure, “Thanks Sam,” he replied and opened his eyes.

There crouched right in front of his face was Phil, all the remaining breath whooshed out of his body.

“Ph-phil,” he mumbled, and winced as Phil hoisted him to his feet.

“Just as bad at riding as ever huh Dan?” Phil teased as he poked him in the side, Dan felt a tingle of joy as Phil teased him as comfortably as they used to.

Sam however looked beside himself with fear and confusion, “You called the Prince by his first name,” he stumbled over his words.

Phil turned to Sam in shock, as he accidentally pressed down on Dan’s arm Dan let out a gasp of pain. That was definitely going to bruise later.

Everywhere was probably going to bruise later.

“Sorry,” Phil mumbled to Dan before he looked back at Sam who was glancing between them in confusion, “Erm yes I did.” He shrugged simply, and wound an arm around Dan to help him on his feet.

Something appeared to dawn on Sam because his mouth dropped open, “You’re… you…” he muttered.

Dan shook his head gently, “Yes,” he whispered and Sad clamped his mouth shut.

Phil didn’t seem to notice tiny Sam’s revelation though as he helped Dan across the path.

“I’ve got him now thank you…” Phil turned to Dan for Sam’s name.

Sam, Dan mouthed and Phil nodded.

“Thank you Sam.”

Sam nodded hurriedly before he rushed off as quickly as his tiny legs could carry him.

Once Sam was out of earshot Phil turned to him smirking, Dan blushed as he realised how close they were.

“So you fell over the front of a horse?” Phil teased and Dan grumbled.

“Shut up,” he pouted, and banged his hip into Phil’s gently. He couldn’t deny the way his body buzzed in every place they were touching, as much as he was trying to get over his feelings for Phil. He couldn’t help it, not when he saw him every day. As they walked along the path, Phil continued to tease him and Dan felt his muscles relax slightly. Fuck, he’d missed this.

Out of nowhere he felt Phil tense, his arm that was around Dan’s waist clenched so tightly that Dan actually let out a little squeak of pain.

“What’s wrong?” He asked and turned to see the tree they were walking past. He felt a stab of pain as he realised what Phil was remembering.

Their one month anniversary had been under that tree, the long leaves had protected them from the world.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled, burying his face into Phil’s shoulder.

He could feel Phil relax slightly, although sadly the walls had been built back up when they passed the tree. Phil didn’t say anything but he did tighten his grip on Dan slightly, pulling him closer and that was enough for Dan.

~-~-~

He let out a hiss of pain through his teeth and the nurse gave him an apologetic look.

Dan tried to convey to him that he didn’t care that much, not while Phil’s hand was clasped in his.

“You alright D-Prince Daniel?” Phil asked, Dan tried to hide the wince he gave when Phil used his full title. It felt like something was ripping at his chest. Even though he knew that it was probably only because of the nurse who was there, it still hurt.

“Yes I’m fine,” he mumbled through gritted teeth.

Every time the nurse dabbed at his scrapes it stung badly. He tried to remind himself that it could have been much worse.

He chose instead to focus on Phil’s warm hand in his own.

That only served to bring tears to his eyes as he begun to remember when this was normal.

When he could hold Phil’s hand in his own without the worry about how Phil was feeling.

Phil was watching him worriedly so he forced a bright smile, however that only made Phil more worried as his frown deepened. The nurse stopped dabbing at a particularly large gash on his arm and looked up at Dan over his glasses. “I’m going to go and log this in Prince Daniel. Then I’ll find you some medicine to help with the pain,” he stated, before he got to his feet and walked out of the room without another word.

As he left the room Phil turned to him, face screwed up in mock anguish.

“God forbid you ever break a bone!” He joked while he poked Dan in the ribs and cackled as he squirmed away.

Dan stuck his tongue out as Phil finally relented, “It was a traumatic experience!”

That caused Phil to giggle which had to be Dan’s favourite sound in the world, he missed the sight of Phil’s tongue as it poked through his teeth. His eyes bright with pure happiness.

“Traumatic,” Phil echoed, and rolled his eyes when he finally stopped giggling.

Dan nodded, unable to prevent the grin that spread across his face as Phil beamed at him.

“Remember when you tried to saddle a pony yourself?” Phil reminisced, Dan flushed at the memory, he remembered how the small butterscotch pony had ran away from him before he could get on, which left him on the ground in the splits as he’d just let go of the barrier.

“Ugh don’t remind me!” He groaned and buried his face in his hands.

That only made Phil laugh harder as he continued to remind Dan of all of his mishaps with horses, “No no Phil I can totally jump over that barrier,” Phil mocked, putting on an incredibly posh accent that sounded nothing like Dan.

“Hey! It’s not my fault you’re a natural,” Dan grumbled, Phil had always been a better horse rider than he, he had a secret knack with animals that Dan could only dream of. Although according to Phil the huge animals scared him, despite the fact his name literally meant lover of horses.

“Oh why thank you!” Phil grinned, and pretended to flip his hair in mock superiority.

Dan groaned and shoved him in the side which only made Phil burst into laughter once again.

~-~-~

Dan couldn’t deal with the pain of it any more, he felt like he was going to explode. Every time Phil looked at him his heart spluttered, he missed him so badly. No matter how much he tried to suppress the feelings they kept bubbling back up. Like a volcano inside himself. He couldn’t do anything though, he wouldn’t do that to Phil. He could see it just in the way Phil tried not to look at him that he didn’t fully trust Dan anymore.

Too scared to be vulnerable or hurt, and understandably so. While Dan didn’t directly want to hurt Phil, he was the one who kicked him out of his home, who didn’t trust him.

They’d loved each other, Dan could understand how that was a kick in the guts.

That didn’t seem to be able to stop him from actively searching for Phil at every opportunity possible.

After he had wandered aimlessly for a bit he found him in a small room, cleaning portraits and dusting.

“Hi,” he greeted as he entered the room, Phil looked up in shock a small smile etched across his face.

“Don’t you have anything better to do than follow me around?” He teased, Dan felt his heart burst as Phil shot him a cheeky grin.

He rolled his eyes, “I just wanted to talk,” he shrugged with over exaggeration, “But if you want me to leave.”

He began to leave the room but Phil’s arms seized him from behind.

Suddenly he found his back against the wall, Phil’s hands gripped his shoulders so tightly they felt as though they were being compressed.

He gasped as Phil pressed their lips together and Dan’s heart all but leapt out of his chest.

It was passionate and fiery, their lips burnt against each other, it was so much more intense and terrifying than anything Dan had ever felt but he loved every second. He loved the way Phil’s hands were had his shoulders pinned in place as they kissed. The way Dan could feel his heart beat against his ribcage, in complete denial that this could actually be happening.

God, he had missed this, Phil’s tongue swiped across his bottom lip and his legs wobbled beneath him, if it weren’t for Phil’s hands holding him up he would have collapsed. It wasn’t as soft and loving as any of their other kisses had been but Dan had missed Phil’s lips against his too much to care.

He felt like he was soaring and falling all at the same time.

Time had paused in this moment and Dan wanted it to stay that way forever, just the two of them with their lips, tongues, hearts and souls intertwined.

Phil’s lips said everything, they reminded Dan of the pain in the last eight months, of how much they’d missed each other. In the way they pushed and pulled against Dan’s he could feel the fear of losing Dan, even though they hadn’t regained each other.

Just as quickly as it had started Phil was jumping away from him as though he had been burnt.

“You can’t do that!” He exclaimed, was he tugged at his hair so harshly that Dan wanted to run forward and take Phil’s hands in his own, just so he would stop hurting himself.

He breathed out shakily, “Phil you kissed me…” he mumbled.

“I know!” Phil screamed back, shaking harshly from shock, “I know and it was stupid I shouldn’t- I can’t…” he broke of with a sob that crumbled Dan’s world.

He crumpled to the floor with his head in his hands and Dan could only stand there and watch as Phil sobbed.

“I’m so stupid…” He heard Phil whisper to himself between gasps and he felt himself move forward on reflex.

“No,” he shook his head, before he dropped to his knees beside Phil, “You’re not stupid.”

Dan laid a hand on Phil’s shoulder and sighed as he leaned into the touch, moving them closer together until Phil was in Dan’s arms.

“You’re the opposite of stupid Phil,” he reassured him, burying his face in Phil’s hair.

It broke his heart to hear his Phil crying, to feel his shirt dampening with his tears.

“I’ve missed you so fucking much Dan,” Phil sobbed, hands clutched onto Dan’s shirt as though he would disappear if he didn’t hold on tight enough.

“Fuck, I’ve missed you too.” Dan replied, as tears of his own spilt over his cheeks.

They sat there for God knows how long, just sat in each other’s arms.

When Dan finally heard Phil’s sobs slow to a sob he pulled him up in his arms so they were face to face. It broke his heart to see how red and tear stained Phil’s face was but he needed to say this.

“I know I fucked up, but I miss you more than you can imagine. I will never hurt you again I promise.” He said softly, Phil’s eyes were soft and vulnerable. Any walls he had built were gone and Dan had never felt so grateful for that.

Phil leaned forward and connected their lips again, softly this time.

It was filled with missed memories and sadness, Dan could taste the salt from their tears but it was okay. They were okay.

He smiled into the kiss, and pressed their foreheads together.

“I’ve missed you so much.” He whispered and a smile spread across Phil’s face.

Dan grinned as he watched a blush creep over Phil’s pale skin, “Missed you more.”

~-~-~

Words couldn’t describe the way Dan’s heart was soaring right now.

Phil’s limbs tangled amongst his own in his bed, their faces so close together that their breaths mingled.

He clutched Phil’s hand tightly in his own, loving the way their fingers twined together.

“It’s two in the morning Dan you need to sleep,” Phil grumbled, as he attempted a pout but just made Dan want to kiss him again, he looked so adorable and sleepy.

“I fucked up my sleeping pattern okay?” Dan replied with a devilish smirk.

Phil giggled, “You royally fucked up your sleeping pattern,” he snickered apparently proud of his awful pun.

Dan groaned loudly, “That is truly awful,” he complained not quite succeeding in forming a frown. Who could blame him?

After eight months without this he couldn’t help but smile.

“You’re awful,” Phil stuck out his tongue and laughed as Dan reached forward and kissed him on the nose. “Sap,” he teased as he poked Dan gently in the side.

Dan nodded, not willing to argue if it meant he could continue to kiss Phil on the nose, as he liked the way it made Phil’s face squidge up.

“Alexis seems nice,” Phil yawned, and wriggled closer so that his head was tucked under Dan’s.

Dan nodded in agreement, “She’s lovely, but she didn’t quite erm understand at the start…” he trailed off and hoped Phil wouldn’t make him explain.

He could feel Phil frown into his neck but thankfully he didn’t say anything.

“Did she start crying when I came in here?” Phil giggled lightly, Dan smiled as he remembered the way Alexis had started to sniffle before excusing herself from the room.

“Yeah she did,” he responded, and cuddled Phil closer so he could bury his face in his hair.

He heard Phil sigh into the touch, which made a smile blossom on Dan’s face as he pressed it into Phil’s hair.

There was a comfortable silence where Dan savoured in the warmth Phil’s body let off when he heard Phil whisper something that made his eyes snap open.

“Pardon?” he mumbled, knowing his heart was beating ridiculously fast against Phil’s back but there was nothing he could do to stop it.

He groaned as Phil shifted in his grip, flipping over so they were eye to eye, “I love you.” Phil whispered again.

This time Dan was certain he heard the words correctly. His mouth dropped open and his heart fluttered impossibly fast as he heard Phil, his Phil, say those words.

Those three words that felt like a universe to Dan.

“I love you too,” the words slipped out of Dan’s mouth so easily it felt like breathing, because it was true. He had loved Phil for so long now it barely felt like a revelation, but still to admit it out loud, to Phil, was exhilarating.

Dan’s heart thundered against his chest, and he knew Phil could feel it from the little smile that tugged at his lips.

“I love you Dan,” he whispered again, the words wrapped around Dan, warm and soft.

Dan leaned forward slightly and pressed their lips together, and sighed into the warmth of Phil’s mouth.

The kiss felt different, sweeter almost, like the words they had just spoken were now sewn into their kisses. The words filled Dan with the beautiful feeling of flying, soaring above clouds and beyond. As cheesy as it was, he would fly anywhere if it was with Phil.

Phil sighed happily as they pulled away, “I’ve missed that,” he grinned at Dan.

Dan felt his cheeks flush up and he buried his face in Phil’s neck.

“You look cute when you blush,” Phil teased, as he wrapped his arm around Dan which ruined any attempt of making Dan annoyed.

“Shut up,” he grumbled anyway and smiled as Phil giggled above his head.

“I love you,” Dan tested again, and loved the way the words felt on his lips.

He felt Phil smile, as he pulled Dan to his chest just a little bit tighter, “I love you too.”

~-~-~

Dan knew he’d missed Phil badly, but every time he saw Phil and remembered I can kiss him again. It made his heart jump and his fingers tingle. Phil seemed to feel the same way because Dan would constantly find himself being tugged into storage cupboards, bathrooms, empty hallways, just for their lips to be pressed together gently. He grinned when he heard Phil’s voice in his bed chambers, excited he would get to see him again but stumbled to a halt when he heard Alexis’ harsh tone.

“You’re being utterly ridiculous Mr Philip and I won’t stand here and listen,” she scolded him. Dan could practically hear her stern frown and crossed arms.

“B-but,” he heard Phil stammer, “Technically we haven’t-”

Dan was itching to hear the end of the sentence but unfortunately Alexis cut Phil off.

“No buts about it.” She tutted, Dan could hear her move around the room and Phil was probably helping her clean up, “You weren’t here Mr Philip,” she continued, her voice suddenly sad.

“What do you mean?” Dan heard Phil ask.

Dan pressed his back against the door to hear better, but also to stabilise himself. He wasn’t sure what they were talking about but his heart thudded uncomfortably loudly. Was Phil having second doubts?

He could only just hear Alexis sigh heavily, “You didn’t see every day, Prince Daniel crying over you. If he doesn’t mean I love you when he says it I don’t know who does.”

Dan felt a smile beam across his face as he heard Phil mutter, “Me.”

So he wasn’t having second thoughts, he hadn’t changed his mind.

Just that thought alone relaxed Dan.

He decided he’d done enough eavesdropping so he knocked on the door.

“Alexis can I come in?” He asked, pretending he didn’t know Phil was in there, as someone who hadn’t listened to their conversation probably wouldn’t know that.

“Yes Your Highness!” She replied, her voice had regained its usual enthusiasm.

Dan entered the door without another word, and smiled involuntarily as he saw Phil. Whether he knew Phil was in there or not he would have smiled.

There was nothing he could do about it, Phil was like a living ray of sunshine.

“I’ll give you two some privacy,” Alexis smirked as she the room.

The second the door shut behind her Dan leapt on Phil, and knocked him onto the bed.

Phil let out a yelp of surprise as they fell backwards but tightened his grip on Dan.

He regained his smile as they hit the soft mattress.

“Hello,” He grinned and Dan remembered when they’d done this last year. Towards the start of their relationship.

He beamed back, “Hi.” His smile slipped away as Phil’s face morphed into something more nervous. “What’s wrong?” Dan asked, as he placed a gentle kiss to Phil’s nose.

He laughed as Phil’s face squidged up the way he loved it to, “Nothing I’m fine,” Phil replied, but his eyes betrayed his true thoughts.

Dan rolled his eyes, “It may have been eight months but I still know you and you’re not fine,” he deadpanned and barely leaving a blink he added, “So what’s wrong?”

Phil sighed, an amused grin tugged at the corner of his lips, “Do you want to be my boyfriend?” He asked.

Dan’s eyebrows furrowed at the question, “Do you really need to ask?” He replied with a soft laugh.

However as he looked into Phil’s eyes he could see that he did, he still didn’t think that Dan loved him.

“Fuck, Phil. I swear I love you, more than you could imagine. Of course I’ll be your boyfriend. Fuck I want to be more than that one day.” He brushed the tears that had built in Phil’s eyes away with the pad of his thumb, “So don’t worry about that.”

Phil grabbed Dan by the shoulders and pulled him into a rough kiss, his lips smashing into Dan’s.

“Thank you,” he mumbled as they pulled away and Dan smiled in return, before he kissed him sweetly, because that said everything Dan couldn’t.

~-~-~

“But how would we tell your parents?” Phil asked, Dan risked a quick glance to look at him before he let his eyes flick back to the screen.

He was completely smashing Phil at Mario Kart, and didn’t want to lose his lead. “That’s a bit of an intense conversation to resume during Mario Kart don’t you think?” he mumbled, eyes still glued the screen.

He could see Phil shrug out of the corner of his eye, “It’s just on my mind,” Phil replied.

Dan smirked and paused the game so he could turn to face his boyfriend, “This is because you’re losing isn’t it?” He teased, and kissed Phil on the cheek.

Phil rolled his eyes, before he took Dan’s controller so he couldn’t go back to the game, “Not everything’s about Mario Kart Dan,” he smirked, reciting Dan’s mother’s favourite sentence from when they were twelve.

Dan grumbled but nodded at Phil to continue,

“I just want to tell them.” Phil began, “The secret thing didn’t work so well last time…” he trailed off and left the sentence to finish itself.

Dan couldn’t help but nod in agreement, he didn’t want to hide them again either.

“So…” Dan prompted, Mario Kart completely forgotten now.

Phil sighed lightly, “So I don’t think they would exactly welcome me as your boyfriend with open arms. Not after what Alexis told- I mean…” Phil stumbled, before he flushed bright red after he realised what he had admitted.

Dan just nodded, he had already known after all, however he did allow a small smirk to tug at the corner of his lips, “Probably not. We need mum to like you before she knows it’s you,” he racked his brains as to how would be best to do that.

Suddenly Phil’s eyes widened and he gripped Dan’s arm, “A masquerade ball,” he mumbled under his breath.

“What?” Dan asked, he watched as Phil started to smile and rubbed his hands together in excitement.

“You should host a masquerade ball. Introduce me while I’m wearing a mask!” Phil bounced with excitement, beaming at Dan about his idea.

It was beginning to dawn on him how brilliant of an idea it actually was. Re-introduce Phil as a mystery perfect suitor who Dan loved.

His mother would love Phil, and maybe wouldn’t freak out when she found out who he actually was.

“That is actually fucking genius!” He exclaimed, and laughed loudly gripping Phil’s arms and shaking him slightly so he burst out laughing, “Phil Lester! You’re a genius!” Dan pulled him into a warm kiss, both boys expressing their excitement through their lips.

~-~-~

Phil giggled and the sound warmed Dan’s heart until he felt like he was sat next to a warm hearth.

“You can’t sneak out at night Your Highness,” Phil bowed mockingly and Dan tugged him to his feet with an eyeroll. He pulled Phil into a gentle kiss, before  cuddled into his boyfriend’s arm happily. Phil tried to take the opportunity to lead Dan back to his bedroom, which Dan hoped would soon be their bedroom. Currently Phil spent most nights with Dan, aside from the occasional time they separated when necessary, to avoid suspicions. Tonight was one of the nights when he was technically in the servants quarters, but Dan couldn’t sleep without him.

“I can do what I want,” Dan smirked as Phil groaned, but followed Dan to the kitchen’s nevertheless.

They tiptoed in, hoping the late night staff would have finished up by now. They were in luck as the kitchen was eerily quiet. Dan grinned as he flicked on a lamp, it let a dim light flood the room but not too bright that they couldn’t handle it.

He quite liked when he was alone with Phil, and it was completely calm.

“I’m hungry,” Dan hurried over to the pantry as Phil chuckled.

“I would assume so, you did drag me to the kitchens at one am,” he pointed out and Dan pulled a face at him over his shoulder.

He pulled out a packet of cookies with a flourish and grinned, “Let’s feast!”

They slid onto the marble bench, Dan was too tired to care that it probably wasn’t hygienic to sit where people prepared food. He shoved a cookie into Phil’s mouth who laughed in response, crumbs falling onto the floor and across his face.

“They’re… really mmhm... good,” Phil swallowed before he pecked Dan on the lips gently, “Almost sweeter than you!”

Dan groaned at the awful cheesiness, but couldn’t deny the way his stomach bubbled every time Phil complemented him. No matter how cheesy it was.

“Apparently late night Phil is a cheesy boyfriend,” he teased as he pulled Phil in for a longer kiss, and enjoyed the way he could taste the chocolate of the cookies on his lips.

He began to find it almost difficult to steady himself as Phil cupped his face in his hand, their lips danced together lazily as they were both half asleep.

“You taste like cookies,” Dan giggled drowsily, and grinned as Phil stuffed a cookie into his mouth in response.

“I want you to taste like cookie,” Phil giggled and Dan snickered as he enjoyed the small pout on Phil’s face.

He kissed it away gently, smiling into the kiss as Phil hummed appreciatively. Their lips moved against each other in a way that made Dan’s stomach flip and swirl, and filled his body with a tingle that flooded down to his toes. He grinned as Phil pulled him closer so that Dan was sat on his lap, their lips didn’t break apart aside from a quick gasp of breath.

Suddenly there was a click and a bright light flooded over them.

They both froze, Phil pulled away from Dan’s lips as quick as lightning, eyes wide like a deer caught in the headlights and they heard an amused chuckle.

Dan grimaced slightly as he turned to be met with Phil’s father who was stood there, hands on his hips in amusement, “I really hope you two weren’t going to go further than that because this is a kitchen and that is my son,” he turned to Dan with a smirk.

Dan felt ready to sink through the floor and die, it seemed Phil was on the same thought path as he buried his face in his hands.

When Dan glanced over at him he could see the flush of his cheeks even past his fingers.

“Dad,” Phil started but the King’s Advisor cut him off with a wave of his hand.

“No no! I told you I would do this and I intend to keep my word,” He exclaimed and Dan turned to Phil in hope for an explanation.

He got nothing but an apologetic glance and embarrassed flushed cheeks. Phil looked cute when he was so embarrassed.

“Daniel, whether prince or not. I believe that my son deserves someone who will love him endlessly. Will you do this?” Phil’s father asked with a false posh accent.

Dan nodded, he had begun to see where this was headed and understood Phil’s overwhelming embarrassment.

“Yes,” he replied and smirked at Phil who looked like he wanted to die.

“I am very glad. Now, if you two have sex in a kitchen I will personally disown you Philip!” He announced before he marched off to the pantry where Dan assumed he was originally headed.

Phil turned to him, cheeks so dark a shade of red that Dan wanted to cuddle him closer and comfort him.

However this was far too good of an opportunity to tease Phil and he planned to seize it.

“You’re blushing,” he said in a sing song voice, and snickered as he nudged Phil’s arm gently, Phil groaned and shoved him in the side before he buried his face into Dan’s neck.

Dan wanted to continue to tease him but Phil snuggled into him made his heart warm and he couldn’t find it in himself.

He blushed slightly as Phil’s father smiled warmly when he walked out, an apple rested in his hand.

“I’m surprised I didn’t guess to be honest,” the King’s advisor admitted before he left them, and called over his shoulder, “Try to go to sleep soon boys!”

Phil mumbled something unintelligible into Dan’s shoulder which Dan took to mean he wanted to go to bed.

“Wanna stay in my room?” Dan asked gently, as he pressed a soft kiss to Phil’s forehead.

Phil nodded sleepily, and Dan tugged him to his feet, wrapping an arm around his sleepy boyfriend. They tiptoed their way back to Dan’s bedroom, and took admittedly longer than they should have because they kept stopping to press gentle kisses to the other’s lips. They had time to make up for after all.

~-~-~

“I am not getting back on a horse,” Dan grumbled as Phil pulled him along towards the stables. He knew Phil liked horses, but forcing him to take part after what happened last time was a step too far, Phil shook his head, and smiled back at Dan in a way that made Dan’s heart melt and his stomach flip.

“Yes you are and we are going riding,” Phil replied easily, he skipped along as they walked towards the stables. At Dan’s groan Phil rolled his eyes, “It’ll be romantic.”

Dan pouted but didn’t argue anymore as Phil continued to walk them towards where Sam was waiting.

He instinctively dropped Phil’s hand, as much as it felt wrong. His hand now swung beside him, almost too empty.

As they approached Sam smiled at them, which displayed one missing tooth right at the front of his mouth, “Why did you let go?” He asked curiously, eyes wide in interest.

Phil turned to Dan, his mouth hung open in shock, “Of what?” Phil asked, Dan could hear the underlying tones of nervousness, which meant Phil knew just as much as he did what Sam was talking about.

“Your hands, you let go! You don’t have to you know. I won’t tell anyone,” Sam said the last part in almost a whisper, as though telling them a secret. Dan couldn’t help the small smile that bloomed on his face, as Phil took his hand again. Sam grinned back at him and Dan almost wanted to reach forward and hug him.

However he knew the small boy would freak out if the prince did anything of the sort, so he restrained himself.

“You lost a tooth!” Dan pointed out and couldn’t stop the smile that covered his face when Sam beamed.

He nodded eagerly, “Last night!” He exclaimed, and bounced on the balls of his feet happily.

“Did the tooth fairy come?” Phil asked and Dan wanted to kiss his boyfriend right there because the look on Sam’s face was worth a million pounds.

“Yes!” He squealed, and pulled a shiny two pound coin out of his pocket and waving it around excitedly, “She gave me this!”

“That’s amazing!” Phil exclaimed and it took all of Dan’s willpower not to kiss him, why did he have to be so perfect?

Sam continued to bounce around before he settled down and asked in a very polite tone, “What would you like Your Highness?”

“Can we have one horse please Sam?” Dan asked and he nodded.

“Would you like Mabel or Fern sir?” Sam asked, he straightened his back as he turned to work mode. Dan couldn’t help but smile as he watched the tiny boy attempt to be professional.

The idea of riding Mabel made him shudder though, “Fern please.” He replied, Phil sent him a knowing look and he flushed while avoiding eye contact.

As Sam went to turn away he stopped, and turned back to face the two older boys, “There’s a small corner where you can’t see anything over there,” he point to a corner where indeed they would be out of the view of any prying eyes, “It might take me a while to saddle her up.” He explained. Dan grinned as Phil went a bright shade of red, and mumbled a quiet, “thank you,” as Sam turned to run away.

They slipped into the corner, hidden behind the red bricks of the stable and the trunk of a Sycamore tree they were truly out of eyesight, unless someone actually walked around the tree they couldn’t be seen.

“For an eight year old that boy is clever,” Phil smirked, as he pressed Dan against the brick wall behind them.

“We were nowhere close to as smart as that at eight,” Dan replied with a laugh, just before Phil kissed him, and caused him to lose his breath as quickly as he gained it.

He blushed as Phil pinned his shoulders up, as he knew fully well by now that Dan lost his balance when Phil kissed him.

“Maybe you weren’t,” Phil teased and Dan just rolled his eyes, pulling him in for another kiss.

Their lips danced together and Dan lost track of time, he forget everything except the way it felt to have Phil’s lips against his.

They broke apart, gasping for air before they moved back together like magnets. He never wanted to leave Phil, to not have Phil by his side.

“Prince Daniel!” Sam’s young voice called out from beside the tree.

Phil pulled away from him, he appeared to be as reluctant as Dan felt.

“Coming Sam!” Dan called back, and pecked Phil once more on the lips, enjoying the way it made Phil’s face beam with happiness.

His lips were swollen and red but twisted into a bright smile that turned Dan’s insides to goo.

They slipped out from out of the tree to find Sam looking very proud of himself, stood before them with the reins of a tall, light brown horse held in his hand.

“Here you are sir!” He held out the reins to Phil who thanked him gently. “Are you alright to mount her sir?” Sam asked and Dan nodded shakily, his fear of horses returned now that the giant creature stared at him. “I-I’ll be fine Sam. Thank you.”

Sam nodded, before turning to run away, his tiny body disappearing as he entered the stable.

“You’ll be fine,” Phil reassured him, guessing correctly as to why Dan was faltering.

As Dan continued to stare at the giant creature he was putting his faith in Phil sighed, “I’m jumping on after we get started remember?”

Dan took a deep breath, and tried to remind himself that Phil was a much better horse rider than him.

“Okay,” he slipped his foot into the stirrup, and used it to boost himself over the huge animal. Fern was much calmer than Mabel, but taller and as Dan sat on him he remembered why he usually rode Mabel.

“He’s really tall Phil,” Dan stammered, his muscles tight with fear as he held onto the reins until they were pressed harshly into the soft skin of his palms.

Phil nodded, “You’ll be fine Dan, I’m going to be there with you okay?” His voice soothed Dan and he felt his muscles relax slightly.

“Okay, let’s go.”

They began at a walk before they started to bounce into a trot, as the trot gained speed Phil began to run beside Dan, he tucked his foot into the stirrup and pulled himself up easily. Dan would be lying if he said his heart didn’t pound a little at the strength of his boyfriend. Even more so, when Phil wrapped his arms around Dan’s waist, “There see, we’re fine,” Phil grinned into his ear and Dan felt a happy shiver travel from the base of his spine to his shoulder blades.

“I love you,” he leaned back into Phil, their heads rested closely together and he sighed into the feeling.

He could just see a smile in Phil’s cheeks, “I love you too.”

~-~-~

Dan lay sprawled out on the bed, a stern expression on his face, “Nope. We can find another way.”

Phil flopped on top of him, the close proximity of their faces made it very difficult for Dan to concentrate, “This is the only way.” Phil insisted and Dan groaned, before he buried his face into Phil’s neck.

“She’ll never agree! To not tell my parents… that’s I don’t know... against servant code,” Dan muttered, his breath fanned into Phil’s neck. He smiled as Phil tried to hide a shiver.

“Firstly, I hid our relationship and you were fine with that. There is no servant code. Secondly she so knows about our relationship.” Phil pointed out and Dan pressed a gentle kiss to Phil’s neck, reveling in the way it made Phil gasp in shock and happiness.

“True,” Dan mumbled, his lips still ghosted against Phil’s neck.

“That is,” Phil gasped again as Dan kissed the sensitive skin, “Very distracting.”

Phil tugged him to his feet and led him to Betty’s chambers, which made Dan very grateful he had Phil because he wouldn’t have had a clue where to begin.

“Betty?” Dan called, as he knocked on the door gently.

The door flung open so quickly Phil nearly fell in, since he’d been leant against it.

There stood Betty, her brown hair pinned into the same bun as usual, a pen stuck through it. Her tall figure nearly matched the ridiculous height of both Dan and Phil but not quite, her strong grey eyes bore into Dan but he could see the same kindness he was used to in her round face.

“Your Highness? What brings you here?” She asked, shock evident on her face as her eyes flitted between him and Phil.

Something seemed to click in her brain as she stepped aside from the door to allow them in.

The first thing Dan noticed was her room was very small, he hadn’t ever been into the servant’s rooms as Phil had always come to Dan’s chambers instead.

There had never been any reason before now to enter one, but it was certainly small. Around the size of Dan’s bathroom, with only just enough space to walk around the bed, with a reasonable sized area at the foot of the bed. Betty’s bed was a dark purple, definitely not black but also not bright enough to be considered violet either.

“We need suits, and we need my parents not to know.” Dan cut straight to the chase, strangely this didn’t seem to faze Betty in the slightest.

“Matching or contrast?” She asked.

Even Phil seemed taken aback by the calm air she had about the whole thing, “You don’t want to know why?” He asked, his voice sounded completely in awe of her folded hands and pleasant smile.

“I figure I’ll find out at some point,” she waved her hands in dismissal.

Dan nodded slowly, barely able to understand the logic there, but for some reason it seemed to be fine with Betty.

“So, matching or contrast?” She asked once again, and stared at them over her rectangular spectacles.

Dan turned to Phil who shrugged, which was incredibly helpful.

“Well we don’t want to be too obvious, so contrast?” He suggested and Betty nodded, which made Dan smile.

He knew there was a reason he had always loved Betty.

“Now strip down both of you, I need to measure you.” She went into her closet to retrieve a measuring tape.

Dan turned to Phil, his cheeks flushed as they begun to take off their layers of clothing.

Despite the fact that they were dating, Dan felt embarrassed with only his boxers on in front of Phil, especially when Phil looked at him the way he was now, as though he was the most beautiful thing in the world. His eyes soft and warm, a smile smile adorned his face.

Dan barely thought that was fair, not when Phil was stood there with his pale chest clearly on display.

Every tiny giggle that left his lips made Dan fall further and further in love.

Subconsciously he had moved forward and suddenly their lips were touching gently, ghosting against each other. As they heard Betty begin to re-enter the room they pulled apart, much to Dan’s disappointment.

Betty raised one eyebrow slightly at the close proximity but it wasn’t a surprised look, more like a smirk, which Dan wasn’t sure Betty was able to produce.

“Mister Daniel,” Betty clicked her fingers for him to come over, “I’m thinking a dark blue, but not too dark. Between navy and cobalt, thoughts Mr Lester?” She asked, all in one breath, to the point as usual.

“Erm yeah sounds good,” Phil replied, his eyes never strayed from Dan.

His soft gaze made Dan’s knees wobble and his heart thunder against his chest.

“You’ve lost weight,” Betty commented idly, as she wrapped the tape measure around his hips and legs.

She then moved on to Phil, it shocked both of them as she grabbed his face and stared straight into his eyes.

“Eggplant purple,” she declared after about thirty seconds, “It would complement your eyes perfectly.”

Dan nodded, every colour would go perfectly with Phil’s eyes in his opinion so he wasn’t going to deny an expert’s opinion.

He tried not to allow the spark of jealousy that flared in his shoulders to truly erupt as she wrapped her arms around his waist.

Firstly, it was her job and he knew that this was necessary. Secondly, she was nearing on her fifties and he knew that she had a husband so he really needed to keep his jealousy under control.

He noticed Phil smirk at him and realised he wasn’t hiding the jealousy very well.

“Shut up,” he mouthed, with a pout.

Phil shrugged, but didn’t stop smiling, eyes bright and so fucking beautiful Dan wanted to die, “I didn’t say anything,” Phil mouthed back, before he blew Dan a kiss.

~-~-~

Alexis had insisted they get changed separately as it was more romantic. Which Dan had to admit, it was true, but it didn't help with the fear of Phil’s possible reactions to Dan in his outfit. What if he hated it?

As he looked in the mirror, Alexis straightened out his suit and helped to fasten the mask, he could see that Betty was right in her choices.

He wore a dark blue suit, just lighter than navy with a crisp white shirt, it sat tightly on his form, and made his shoulders more pronounced and his body more shaped.

His mask was fully gold, tendrils of embossing circled his eyes and twirled their way up to the centre of his forehead where they shaped a small crown.

He could see his brown eyes glowed from behind the mask, the flecks of gold that Phil assured him he had were for once visible.

“You look very nice Your Highness,” Alexis beamed at him, a motherly look in her eyes.

Dan let his instinct take control as he turned around and hugged her.

She squeezed him back tightly but pulled away happily when a hesitant knock sounded at the door.

“Alexis?” Max’s voice called from behind the door, “Neither of us can tie his erm… tie,” he explained.

Alexis rolled her eyes at Dan, but she grinned anyway. Dan knew she loved to help all of them, especially Max, as apparently he had barely ever openly told her he needed help despite being the best friend of her daughter.

“I’m going to get some fresh air,” Dan mumbled as Alexis hurried out, he grinned and stepped out onto the balcony and relished in the wave of cold air that washed over him.

As he stared out at the sun beginning to set Dan thought about tonight.

His mother had, as predicted, been beyond happy when Dan told her that he’d found a suitor who he really loved.

The fact that this suitor was a boy didn’t seem to bother her at all, which meant Dan felt slightly less terrified.

Although if he was honest he was more scared of Phil changing his mind, not actually wanting to tell his parents about them, not wanting them anymore. It was irrational and stupid, but he couldn’t help it.

Warm arms wrapped around him from behind which caused Dan to squeal in shock but any scared thought also flew from his mind as Phil pressed his lips to the back of Dan’s neck.

“You scared me Phil,” Dan grumbled, but he found it difficult to keep the smile off his face as Phil continued to press tickling kisses to the sensitive skin at the top of his spine.

“Hi Bear,” Phil whispered softly, The use of Dan’s childhood nickname made his heart flutter. However Dan could hear the nerves in his voice.

He turned around to face Phil and his heart stopped, a deep purple mask shaded Phil’s eyes and matched perfectly with his purple suit.

There were music notes painted onto the mask that framed the underneath of his eyes, edged with gold embossing that shone in the dusk light.

He looked so stunning that for a moment Dan forget everything that was scaring him, because he had this boy to call his own.

“You are so beautiful,” Phil said softly and that alone left Dan speechless.

He was beautiful?

The last thing he had expected was to be called beautiful before he got the chance to tell Phil the exact same thing. Rather than replying he leaned forward and pressed their lips together, trying to tell Phil how much he loved him while his voice was forgotten. It didn’t matter because as Phil kissed back it was like they were having a conversation.

“I love you. I love you. I love you.” His lips repeated as they brushed against Phil’s.

His hands reached up to cup Phil’s face and they moved closer as Phil’s hands rested on his hips.

“We have to go to the party now,” Dan whispered, he wished he didn’t have to break the beautiful, silent moment.

However he could see Alexis stood near the door, nervously fluttering but not wanting to come and break them up, which Dan could understand. So he had to be the one to break the serene moment they had, much as he hated it.

Phil smiled gently and pressed a kiss to the nose just visible out of Dan’s mask.

He moved so close that their eyes were perfectly in line and Dan felt his heart skip a beat as he stared at the beautiful seas that he loved so much.

They were so close he could see the flecks of yellow that reminded Dan of paint splatters in the blue green canvas that was his boyfriend’s eyes.

“I love you,” Phil mumbled and it made Dan tingle all over.

“I love you too,” he replied, as Phil’s eyes bore into him in the most beautiful way, as though he was trying to memorise every fleck of gold in Dan’s eyes.

“Let’s do this,” Phil took his hand.

~-~-~

His mother had set up the whole works; trumpets, an announcement, hundreds of eyes turned in him and he had to swallow back the fear in his throat.

With one last glance back at Phil who offered a shaky thumbs up as he stepped into the ballroom.

He was pretty sure no prince had been introduced to a ball with trumpets since the medieval times but there was nothing he could do as they burst into a little introduction.

“Prince Daniel!” A man with a deep voice presented.

Dan smiled, his mask thankfully hid most of his fear.

He could see his mother beam at him happily from behind an elegant gold and white mask lined with soft blue, her huge ball gown matched it perfectly. As he stumbled his way down the stairs, and tried not to seem like too big of a flop he smiled back at his mother, relieved that she actually did seem excited about meeting Phil.

“I’m so proud of you Daniel,” she kissed him on both cheeks and the act of affection made him grin.

“Thank you mother,” he replied softly.

He saw Phil sneak in through the servant doors, his hand tugged along by a tiny Sam in a white suit. Sam’s usually messy blonde hair combed neatly to the side and a small bow tie sat beneath his chin. Phil looked up at him and grinned, his face only partly visible beneath his mask but Dan could still see the fond enjoyment in his eyes.

Sam’s white mask was simple, and obvious that it belonged to a servant, but cute all the same, Dan wanted to run up and pull him into a hug, but that wouldn’t be appropriate, in this setting especially.

“So when will I meet this suitor of yours. Is he here?” His mother asked as she looked around, Dan was careful not to look at Phil despite how much his head wanted to turn there.

“He is here, and you will meet him soon,” Dan replied, and tried to keep a semi mysterious air. The more he got his mother excited to meet his suitor and then how much she liked him was very important.

His mother nodded and walked away to his father, he had to admit the small bounce in her step made him extremely happy. Many people approached him with well wishes and congratulations, in the past other suitors may have attempted to still become his partner despite him having found someone.

However in modern times that wasn't considered appropriate, thank god.

“Congratulations,” James sneered at him, Dan couldn’t help but wonder why he had been invited in the first place. Dan smiled back brightly, and ignored the malice in James’ eyes choosing to focus on the fact that he wouldn’t have to hide his relationship with Phil any longer.

“Thank you,” he replied before he marched off to Phil, he decided that there had been enough mystery as to who his suitor was.

Phil seemed slightly surprised as he saw Dan walk towards him and he giggled softly as Dan came into earshot.

“Impatient?” He teased.

Dan groaned with a small pout, he wished he could just pull Phil into a kiss there, but he knew they needed to take it slowly, “Just a little,” he replied with a shrug.

Sam grinned at him widely, his tooth just beginning to grow back, “Hello Prince Daniel!” He replied cheerily, before he lowered his voice to a hushed whisper and after he beckoned Dan closer he added, “I haven’t told anyone that it’s Mr Philip,” he promised.

Dan grinned, and gave the small boy a wink, “Thanks Sam. You won’t have to keep it a secret too much longer,” he said with a smile.

The idea was almost too good to humour, that Dan would be able to pull Phil into a kiss no matter where they were. That they could hold hands, cuddle in the library, walk through the orchard and plant kisses to lips without the worry of being spotted.

He felt Phil place a hand on the small of his back, which sent shivers up his spine.

“Let’s go talk to your parents yeah?” Phil whispered in Dan’s ear, his mask brushed the side of Dan’s face slightly. Dan nodded, and shifted so that Phil’s arm was wrapped tightly around him before he kissed him softly on the cheek. Both boys snickered softly as James’ wine glass dropped to the floor with a quiet smash, due to Cecilia gripping his arm too tightly. Her soft pink dress was large and flowery, like she was trying too hard to stand out.

Dan smiled at her, unable to keep dislike from his eyes.

She glared back, her blatant anger harsh in her eyes. In all honesty he was surprised she hadn’t told everyone it was Phil, since she had to have guessed already.

That much he could be grateful to her, it wasn’t much, but he supposed it would have to do.

His mother beamed with excitement, and clutched onto his father’s arm.

The King was wearing a pale blue suit to match his wife and a knowing expression, his mask hid some of it but Dan could see his father knew exactly who the mystery suitor was.

He swallowed heavily and allowed Phil’s arm to calm him.

“Mother, Father,” he nodded to both of his parents, “This is my suitor,” he stepped to the side as Phil kissed his mother’s hand.

“It is a pleasure to meet you my queen,” Phil bowed.

Dan could have sworn he saw his mother blush happily as Phil stood back up.

“And what is your name?” She asked with a polite nod of her head, clearly already taken with Phil.

Dan watched as Phil took a moment to consider before he replied calmly, “ Isn't a charade part of a masquerade ball Your Majesty? Why, I think under a mask we show who we truly are, our real faces are the masks, the masks we put on to survive the real world. The masks that we hide behind and hope to shield us from jealousy, anger and hatred. Tonight, however, we can be however we want .”

The queen nodded her eyes lit up in interest for this mysterious stranger and Dan grinned as Phil squeezed his hand.

Neither the King nor Queen appeared to notice this though as they smiled at each other.

Dan could still see the knowing twinkle in his father’s eyes as he ushered them away, “Go dance! Enjoy the night!”

Phil turned to him with a smile, taking his arm in a similar fashion to how you would escort a princess, “Shall we dance Your Highness?” He asked, a bright smile lit up his face.

“Yes we shall,” Dan replied, his cheeks ached from the smile that wouldn’t go away.

He beamed, and happiness radiated from his chest as Phil took his hip, and took Dan’s other hand in his so that they were in a typical waltz position. They began to twirl around the dance floor with the music, laughter bubbled in Dan’s chest as he was reminded of what an awful dancer Phil was. Their feet trod on each other’s whenever they turned which just served to make Dan laugh harder.

“You’re so bad,” he giggled as Phil spun him around clumsily.

He loved the way his body felt pressed up against Phil’s regardless of whether thier dance was elegant or not. They had stopped being in a traditional royal relationship the moment they started after all.

Phil poked his tongue out, “Shut up,” he grumbled, and attempted to pout but was smiling too widely to properly achieve it. Dan grinned and pulled Phil in closer against him, and let their hips press together as they twirled around, he swapped their hands so that Dan was in the lead.

“Maybe you should let me lead us?” Dan suggested with a raise of his eyebrow.

Phil opened his mouth to object before he snapped it shut and nodded in a resigned way.

Dan winked with an over exaggerated flourish, and ravished in the way it made Phil giggle, his tongue poked through his teeth. With Dan’s lead they begun to glide across the floor, Phil’s feet being tugged away from Dan’s until they were danced around the room so elegantly that he saw Cecilia’s jaw drop open.

He remembered when she had danced with him the first time.

She had practically dragged Dan onto the dance floor. She had held herself against him but Dan had attempted to hold her at arm’s length. This made it a not at all enjoyable dance and he was quite unable to properly lead them with the space between them. It was awkward and clumsy as Cecilia was an awful dancer for a princess and without Dan’s help was unable to actually waltz with him.

Dan couldn’t help but grin as he thought about how different this was.

Phil was pliant and warm against him, he allowed himself to be lead across the dance floor with a smile constantly on his face.

They felt like one person together, one unit that could do whatever they wanted.

“Okay yeah you leading was a good idea,” Phil murmured as Dan spun him around,before he pulled him back against his chest easily.

Dan laughed softly as he opened them up only to draw them back together again.

“I know,” he whispered when he drew Phil close enough.

They continued to dance all through the night, eventually too exhausted to continue to waltz around the room, instead they simply swayed in each other’s arms, heads rested on each other’s shoulders.

Dan could sense Phil look at something over Dan’s shoulder. He looked as though he wanted to go and do something, Dan followed his line of view and saw tiny Sam carrying a huge pile of plates and other dirty crockery, his tiny knees shook from the heavy weight he was carrying. They walked over to him without another word, hands slipped into each other’s as they walked as though on instinct.

“Hey Sam,” Phil bent down to the small boy’s height who attempted to look at who was them to him over the pile of plates he was carrying.

“Hello Prince Daniel! Hello Mr…” he trailed off as he remembered he wasn’t allowed to say Phil’s name. Dan took some of the crockery at the top of the pile out of Sam’s hold and heard the boy’s sigh of relief as the weight was semi relieved.

“Hi Sam,” Dan offered him a gentle smile, “Do you want us to help you?” He asked and Sam nodded hurriedly.

Phil took a similar pile to Dan’s off of the huge pile of plate the small eight year old was carrying. Dan remembered when Phil used to be this kid, the one who was piled with plates and crockery and anything else that needed to be lugged to the kitchen.

He wished that someone could have helped like he and Phil were now.

“Are we taking them to the kitchen?” Phil asked, and smiled at a noble as they passed.

Sam nodded again, he had to walk twice as fast in order to keep up with both Dan and Phil.

However he beamed with excitement as they walked to the kitchen, “I was given the special job of helping get the dishes but then people piled them a bit too much,” Sam explained. Phil gave Dan a look that said that was what Phil was told as well, they both smiled sympathetically.

“We’re very proud of you for trying so hard,” Phil encouraged him with a bright smile although Dan could see the pain behind his eyes, as he remembered the way he had crashed to the floor when he and Dan were only eleven smashing at least twenty plates that were held in his arms.

As they placed the plates down and re-entered with Sam in tow, a musician announced that this was the last song before the prince and suitor’s final dance.

“Would you like to dance with us Sam?” Phil asked and Dan beamed at him.

Sam’s eyes widened until they were the size of saucers, a huge smile covered his face as he nodded excitedly.

“A-am I allowed?” He asked, as he nervously glanced between Dan and Phil, when they nodded he bounced on the balls of his feet excitedly, “Yes please!” He exclaimed.

Dan took his hand and led him to the middle of the dance floor, Phil took his other hand and filled Dan’s body with tingles.

Sam took Phil’s hand so that they were stood in a small circle and swaying on the spot.

“You’re like the bestest prince ever Prince Daniel,” Sam said happily as Dan twirled him in a little circle. Dan felt his heart warm happily as the words left Sam’s lips, “Thank you,” he grinned.

Phil smiled at him, his eyes warm and soft, “I agree Sam. He’s like the bestest in the world.”

Dan felt his cheeks flush as Phil squeezed his hand.

The song trickled to an end, Sam jumped backwards and bowed awkwardly before he hurried off. Dan took Phil in his arms and assembled them so that they were ready to dance, as it was the last dance of the night, everyone would watch them.

“Do you want me to lead?” He teased Phil, who merely rolled his eyes and allowed Dan to take his arms.

They begun to glide across the floor, and their feet stepped in perfect time. Although Phil’s steps were a little more clumsy. Dan could feel Phil’s heart as it thundered against his chest, they were pressed so closely together.

“I love you,” Phil whispered in his ear as they begun to slow to a stop.

Dan grinned, “I love you too,” he replied easily.

He cradled the back of Phil’s head in his hand and pulled their lips together.

Their masks brushed against each other’s as their mouths pressed together gently, as usual they fitted perfectly and comfortably so that they seemed connected.

Every part of them, connected and together.

Hands in hair, lips softly pushed and pulled against each other.

It can’t have gone for more than thirty seconds but it was Dan’s favourite kiss they ever had, the way their lips appeared to pour out their love for each other. Every time they touched sweet and comfortable, a reminder that this was the last time they would be a secret. In a couple of minutes everyone would know about them.

Dan couldn’t tell whether his heart was thumping because of the kiss or because of nerves.

As they pulled away he smiled gently at Phil, “Are you ready?” He asked softly, so quietly that only Phil would be able to hear.

Phil nodded, his eyes never looked away from Dan’s.

“Ok,” Dan whispered, “I have an idea, do you trust me?” he asked nervously.

Phil’s eyes were an electric blue today, the purple and gold of the mask brought out the bright green and yellow flecks in his irises.

“I will always trust you,” Phil replied without even a thought.

Dan blushed lightly, and pulled away out of Phil’s arms just enough so he could reach Phil’s mask easily.

“Take mine off first,” Dan whispered, this felt like a special moment that should remain between the two of them, they didn’t need other people to eavesdrop.

Phil nodded, his warm fingers brushed against Dan’s face as he undid the golden clasps, “I love you,” Phil mumbled as he revealed Dan’s face, Dan felt his heart leap at the way Phil looked at him.

“I love you too,” Dan said back as he removed the purple mask from Phil’s eyes and revealed the person that Dan loved so dearly, the eyes that sparkled like the ocean in the morning.

He heard a few people who could see Phil gasp, his parents however were on the other side. Unable to see the newly revealed person beneath the mask, the mystery suitor who Dan had finally fallen for. His father seemed to be a bit nonchalant, Dan had no doubts that his father already knew who the mysterious person behind the mask was.

“I love you,” Dan whispered one more time, as he took Phil’s hands.

“I love you too.”

As Phil drew him into the last kiss they would ever share before his parents knew about their relationship Dan couldn’t help but smile.

This was all he wanted in life, to be able to kiss Phil like this whenever he wanted.

In front of whoever he wanted.

Phil’s nose nudged against his gently as their lips melded together. It was soft and warm, like being cuddled in a fluffy blanket, Phil’s lips tasted and felt like home.

As they drew away Dan couldn’t stop the smile that covered his face, and it seemed Phil felt the same.

He could feel his mother’s eyes burn into them from over Phil’s shoulder, so with a sigh he gave Phil a look that said ‘are you ready?’

Phil nodded, and took his hand and Dan took a deep inhale of air to calm the nerves that were returning to his system.

Together they turned to face Dan’s parents.

His mother’s mouth dropped open, so that she vaguely reminded Dan of a painting he studied at one point called The Scream .

“Philip?” She gasped, and clutched Dan’s father’s hand so tightly Dan actually saw the King wince.

Phil shrugged sheepishly, his skin an adorable shade of pink as Dan’s parents “met” him as Dan’s boyfriend.

He bowed politely as he had been taught to his whole life, as he let go of Dan’s hand for a moment to do so.

“Your Majesties,” Phil murmured so lowly that the royal family could only just hear him.

Dan glanced at his parents worriedly, or more specifically his mother, his father seemed to be rather proud of himself as he must have already guessed.

His mother appeared to have mildly recovered, as her mouth had closed and her grip on Dan’s father has loosened. As his mother inhaled through her nose Dan felt his heart drop and tears sting his eyes, he could already sense disapproval on the horizon.

“Treat him well,” The queen said, her voice slightly strained but genuinely happy, “My son deserves someone like you, someone kind. I’m sorry for how I’ve t-treated you,” She apologised.

Dan could tell how hard it was for her to say, she never apologised to anyone.

Never admitted she was wrong, or that she had done something bad, but she was now and that was all that mattered.

It was both Dan and Phil’s turn to let their mouths hang open now, Phil’s hand gripped Dan’s as though he believed if he didn’t hold on tight enough it would all be a dream.

Dan felt exactly same way, this couldn’t be real.

Couldn’t be real.

“I love you Daniel,” his mother turned to him, “I want you to be happy. Understand I will need some time but I will definitely support you.” She faced both of them and added, “Both of you.”

Even the King was staring proudly at his wife, this was possibly the best moment of Dan’s life.

He dropped Phil’s hand and raced forward. He pulled his mother into a hug, she let out a small gasp of surprise before he wrapped her arms around him.

It was tense and strange, he hadn’t properly hugged his mother since he was very tiny, but her petite frame was warm and he was just so grateful.

~-~-~

They trudged their way up to Dan’s bedroom.

No.

Their bedroom, at a time that nobody should be awake.

In fact he was almost positive that the sun had begun to rise through the window in his lounge room but he didn’t bother to check.

He flopped into the bed, and was automatically drawn to the warmth that was Phil. He wrapped his arms around Phil’s waist and drew them together, pulling Phil’s lips against his like a reflex.

Phil tasted of expensive wine and grapes as Dan’s weirdo of a boyfriend “doesn’t like cheese”.

They were soft and lazy kisses as both boys were too tired to make out but more just enjoyed being able to kiss each other. Dan loved the way that even in their exhausted state, Phil could still make his stomach flip and his heart race. Even though he was sure he would kiss these lips hundreds of times to come, it still felt like a treasure that he needed to protect and that was alright with him.

Their bubble had been popped, Dan’s family knew about them, their secret was out in the world. However they were still just Dan and Phil, a special secret that still felt like it only belonged to them.

Dan wouldn’t have it any other way.

He pulled away and tucked his head under Phil’s chin against the warm chest that he would use as a pillow.

“I love you idiot,” Dan pressed a kiss to the skin beneath Phil’s chin, and enjoyed the way it made a little gasp escape Phil’s lips.

He could hear the smirk in Phil’s voice as he replied,

“I love you too, you royal pain.”

fin

[allaboutwannaone-blog]

enemies to lovers!sungwoon 

genre: fluff word count: 2.0k summary: would you listen to your heart, or your mind in the face of love? author’s note: first scenario up, sorry if its too cringey (´・ω・`)  /edits are mine!/

• well *claps three times sassily*

• iTs hA sAeng uN tiMe

• sungwoon was,,, really just like any other classmate (who sits behind you)

• aside from his obnoxiously stupid loud voice (which you’ll grow to love shh)

• and his stupid round glasses that dEfiNiteLy dIdN’T sUiT hIm aT aLL???!! (inserts overly used spongebob meme)

• and his stupid lips that look like clouds (and probably tastes like them too) 

• and his stupidly sparkly eyes and his stupidly cute height and jUst uGh

• come to think of it he was never really a normal person and you were just a wee bit attracted to him JUST A WEE BIT A WEE BIT 

• but ever since this argument you had in front of the entire class,, the wee feelings you thought you had for him disappeared (did it really??) because boi he is annoying  눈_눈 

• it was literature class and your teacher!jisung was asking a question about whether you should follow your heart or your mind when making a choice 

• jisung: “so…y/n, what do you think?”

• you: “actually, i personally think that thinking with your mind is a better option because it will lead you to making a more rational choice, since your heart may make risky decisions based on your emotions. following your heart will not work well in situations that are pressurising.”

• jisung: “brilliant, any other opinions, class?”

• sungwoon: “well, actually, i personally think that your argument is flawed because your mind is logical and logic follows the conventional way of thinking. you’ll never get to go out of your comfort zone! you’ll never take any risk! that’s why you have to think with your heart. think, think!”

• oH HO aH HA *rubs hands in glee* D RA M A

• you: “but taking risks will get you into trouble!”

• sungwoon: “well that’s because you’re a goody-two-shoes!”

• you: “says the one who hasn’t skipped school before.”

• him: “says the one who never fails to hand up your homework on time.”

• you both: “sAYS THE ONE-“

• jisung, exasperatedly: “ALRIGHT CLASS, LET’S SETTLE DOWN, NO FIGHTING BECAUSE YOU GUYS ARE UNDERAGE.” 

• ok but he’s secretly shipping you guys together because oo you both noticed each other’s habits in school mHmMmMmMmm!m

• anyway

• that was the beginning of the hatred between the two of you,, you were like bij what the feck 

• queueing for food in the cafeteria? sungwoon secretly slips in front of you when you're distracted,, talking to your friends

• you confront him about it - but he acts like he doesn't know anything even though the small smirk on his face tells you otherwise,, and that infuriated you to no end

• having lessons? you turn behind and ‘accidentally’ knock over his pencil case to pass him papers teachers give out 

• you feel bad whenever he has to pick everything back up but your pride ain't gonna let you stoop that low to help the enemy so you just kind of just signal to your lab partner baejin to help him and he's always ʘ‿ʘ because he knows something’s up but only for a moment as he remembers you have the video of him headbanging on top of a table once because he didn't hear you entering his dorm room,,,bUT THATS A STORY FOR ANOTHER TIME

• however,, one day when you were going home after long gruelling hours in prison (jk school), you decided to take a detour to a convenience store since you are a thirstin’ and hungry hoe 

• after spending eons deciding on which snack to buy (you ended up buying one of each of the five types you painstakingly shortlisted), you finally decided to go and pay

• bUT GUESS WHO YOU SAW ????? (cues the ‘no shit, sherlock’s)

• yes it is,,, HA SUNGWOON1!1!1!!1!1!1!!

• but he wasn't alone

• was he with a girlfriend????? boyfriend????

• NO!!

• he was with an old lady

• and well, being the nosy person you are, you crept closer forward to figure out what they're saying in front of a pissed off cashier while pretending to look at the drinks

• old lady: “i’m sorry, i do not have enough money to pay for everything. are you sure there's no discount for the elderly? i have the card with me-”

• cashier, rudely cuts in: “this is the second time you're asking me that, and the answer is. still. no. fix your hearing, will you?”

• sungwoon: “fix you manners, will you? i’ll pay for her as well so shut the hell up and start being polite, will you?”

• the mildly stunned cashier decided to shut the hell up and started being polite; scanning their items and even bowed to them after they left.

• however, all you noticed was the blinding smile sungwoon gave to the lady.

• it made you feel things

• good things

• something sort of like…butterflies in your stomach

• your mind tells you to sTOP THINKING OF FRATERNISING WITH YOUR ENEMY THAT’S A BIG NO-NO

• …but your heart speaks otherwise

• you decided to leave the store after purchasing your goods (not without giving the cashier a stink eye) not long after ,, and surprise, surprise!

• you knocked your forehead against the chin of someone (that someone has an unbelievably sharp chin and it probably left a dent in your skull) coming into the store

• and it was,,, sungwoon?? again??

• him: “wait, you…were in there the whole time?”

• you: *blinks* *nods dazedly*

• him: “oh…um, i, um forgot to buy my milk and you’re, um, blocking the entrance?”

• you: “oh.” *doesn’t budge*

• you, 10 seconds later: “youdidwellbacktheregoodjobokbye” *runs away*

• you realised that that was actually your first conversation with him that didn't include any fighting…and you screwed it up 

• but why do you even care about that?? like, who cares if you talk to him??

• “you do.” your smol beating heart whispers.

• and that was the day you started falling for him.

• you started noticing how he always seemed to pick up your pen whenever you try some cool tricks which often resulted in it flying backwards (and hitting him once but you swear it was an accident)

• how he never fails to try his best and give you constructive feedback whenever the teacher told you guys to switch papers to mark (even though he’ll always add in some snarky remarks like “hah betcha didn't listen in class”)

• how he defends his friends when they get laughed at for not knowing how to answer questions at times 

• how his lips look so full and cloud-like 

• but what about him, then? does he feel the same?

• honestly,, the day you ran away after complimenting was the incident that really got him thinking that hey i’m really am whipped

• yes that's rIGHT

• he liked you even before that incident because you looked cute bickering with him (he thought you resembled a smol angry bird)

• and that day just,, confirmed his suspicions that he really likes you

• but he was scared,,

• that you’ll reject him because in his opinion,, you looked like you hated him a lot

• he had no idea how to rectify that because honestly bothering you was the only way he could keep talking to you 

• bUt hAh jokes on both of you guys because you like each other 

• hOWEVER, THERE WAS A PROBLEM

• none of you are budging to make the first move even though you guys keep staring at each other across the cafeteria 

• small accidental (🤔🤔) brushes of hands when passing down assignments make you feel fuzzy inside 

• shy smiles are now exchanged instead of mock glares anD eveRyoNe around y’all is just like “feck this tension between you guys, i’ll die before y’all even kiss”

• and you're just “…hAhh no he doesn't like me…NOT THAT I LIKE HIM EITHER” (baejin: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°))

• to make sure that everyone lives to see you guys become an item,, sungwoon’s and your friends decided to hatch a plan to get you guys together (they deadass created a group chat for it called ‘we are gonna make this happen’ what jokes)

• …that's why you find yourself pacing up and down the garden in your school (it's monstrous and no lie you were kinda afraid of it but nvm) because your bestie told you to meet her there after eating lunch and you're just like ?? i thought you had a meeting 

• her: stfu nobody asked for your opinion jUst gO aLonG wiTh tHe fLoW jk i love you

• when you finally heard the crunching of leaves and twigs, you launched into your rant like bRUH I’VE BEEN WAITING HERE FOR TWENTY MINUTES WHY ARE-

• unknown: “…sorry?”

• you, a stuttering and blushing mess: “oh-h sor-ry i thought you were my b-best friend because i was supposed to b-be meeting her here.”

• sungwoon, a tad shyly: “wait, what? my friends told me to meet them here too!”

• you: “…oh. guess we have to wait together…then.”

• after five minutes of agonising awkwardness (istg the both of you were dying to speak but it was like there was this invisible barrier), you couldn't take it anymore 

• you: “um, so-”

• sungwoon, at the same time, loudly: “UM, SO-“

• you: “ok you go first”

• him: “no you go first”

• you: “no YOU go first”

• him: “fine”

• you: “fine”

• you: “why aren't you speaking????”

• you, looking over worriedly at the flustered boy: “did you become mute??? are you sick?? your ears are turning red!!!!!”

• him, after a one minute mental pep talk: “okay so you're one of the dumbest persons i've ever met but you're also one of the prettiest too and i've been waiting to say this for the past few months but i really like you a lot but i know that you hate me and want me to be banished to the other side of the world and i'll back off if you don't like me which is a highly possible answer but i like you a lot and fuck why am i rambling”

• you: “wait shut up and let me process what you just said”

• you: *processes for a long time because yOU CANT BELIEVE YOUR CRUSH LIKED YOU BACK*

• him: “…oooookay i’m about to be rejected i should skedaddle away right now”

• and honestly you felt like you could burst but no you can't burst because then you'll never be his girlfriend so you try to keep your guts from exploding 

• but sungwoon was already leaving ,,, you have to takE A C TION 

• so you ran up to him and told him that you actually reciprocate his feelings ,, and you gave him the best hug you could ever give (one that u reserved for only your soft toys and well technically sungwoon is as soft as a soft toy so it makes sense)

• HE WAS SHOCKED, SURPRISED, STUNNED, SHOOK, SURPRISED, SHOCKED (…what else i am not a living thesaurus ffs) 

• his heart was doing that little jump thingy whenever he was around you like “!1!1!!1!????!1!!!!” and he was so happy he wanted to turn around and kiss you but 

• AT THAT MOMENT BEFORE YOU GOT TO TASTE HIS CLOUD LIKE LIPS

• you heard the rustling of leaves and a group of people climbed out of their hiding spots in bushes, behind plants, trees, a random beach chair

• daniel: HEY HEY HEY KEEP IT PG-13 OR THE POLICE WILL COME

• baejin: yEA WE HAVE A BABY HERE *points to daehwi*

• jihoon: and we won't want to scar our eyes lololol no offence to you y/n this is directed to our hyung

• your bestie: i KNEW THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA

• ,,,and that was the end of your fiasco in the garden (not without those bright smiles from your boyfriend that could actually save the world and a few pecks sneaked in) 

• BUT IT WAS JUST THE BEGINNING OF THE CUTEST RELATIONSHIP EVER WITH SUNGWOON, AN ANGEL,,

• and you realised that hey you thought with your heart when you confessed to him lmao

[knightedwriter]

Christmas Drabble

Happy Christmas to those who celebrate! With the help of the lovely @incandescent-creativity I’ve written a little holiday Garrick/Alderon AU. Seriously, she’s been such a help with this and is an amazing writer, so definitely follow her if you haven’t.

Without further ado, the drabble is under the cut~ Enjoy, and happy holidays everyone!

One

“Alderon.”

He looks up, marking his page without a second thought. “Yes?”

Garrick’s face is hesitant, and he picks at a fingernail. “What do you… Did we have any holiday plans?”

“Not that I know of. Why?” The caution to the knight’s attitude is unusual, and it piques Alderon’s curiosity.

“Let’s just say that we do now,” Garrick hedges. “I was talking with Serah, and she sort of brought up the idea of…” He pauses, seemingly unsure how to phrase the idea that the witch put forward.

“Go on,” Alderon encourages mildly. “Out with it. What foolish thing has she come up with now?”

“I know for a fact that you like her just as much as I do, eccentric ideas and all.”

Alderon snorts. “‘Eccentric’? That’s one word for it.”

“She wants a holiday party.”

Alderon stares at Garrick, his eyes narrowing and a thin drip of dread trickling into his stomach. “Excuse me?”

“Well...We’re leaving soon, and both of us thought it might be nice to have a little get together before we do. Besides, you’ve never really done something like that, right?”

Alderon sighs. “I do not have anything even close to a desire to do something like this.”

“It’ll be good for you,” Garrick says, pursing his lips. “Be a little social. You could meet some of my old friends.”

“By old friends I assume you mean knights. You know, the people who are likely to throw silver at me if I even hint at what I am.” Alderon’s lip curls in a slight break in composure. “And what of Draeya? The twins? They are not exactly law-abiding.”

“I’d only invite the ones who wouldn’t hurt us.” His tone is remarkably reasonable for a discussion about knights that would destroy Alderon in an instant and jail their children. “Come on, Der. I know it’ll be good for the kids, too.”

Garrick’s gold eyes are round and pleading. Alderon runs a hand through his hair, the mere thought of a room full of loud, drunk, rude people giving him a headache. “I can’t leave you and Serah alone together for more than a minute. When were you two planning on doing this?”

“You mean we’ll go?” His eyes have lit up now, and a grin has spread across his face. Sometimes, Alderon hates how that smile makes him want to acquiesce to any demands Garrick has for him.

“I am considering it. Nothing more. So: when were you planning on this happening?”

“A week,” Garrick answers, the smile on his face growing in a way that tells Alderon he isn’t actually being given a choice anymore.

“A week,” Alderon repeats. “Have you told any of the kids?”

Garrick’s smile shifts into one that is slightly more devious. “A’s already on decorations. N wasn’t all that pleased, but she’ll go. And I thought you could tell Draeya.”

Sneaky bastard. If Alderon had one weakness (besides Garrick, of course), it was that little girl. Alderon grunts, looking away from the persuasive look on Garrick’s face.

“So is that a yes?” Garrick prompts, waggling his eyebrows.

Alderon stands and steps closer to his knight, eyes intense. Before Garrick can ask again, Alderon pulls him forward and brushes his lips against his. “I do believe you’ve won this one,” he murmurs.

“Don’t I usually?” Despite the triumph in those words, Garrick’s smile is soft and content.

The only response Alderon dignifies that with is another kiss.

Two

The holiday party is everything that Alderon had expected it to be. Which is to say, irritating.

Serah has supplied plenty of drink, and Peter has noticed the wealth of alcohol. Perhaps he noticed it too quickly, but no one can blame him; losing a child to the winter cold is hard on anyone. Garrick had told them all to be careful what they said around him, and so far, Alderon has done his best to “be nice”. Still, Alderon could do without Peter’s slurred speeches on the virtues of listening to parents and sitting up straight. A and N shut him down almost immediately, and fond pride blooms in Alderon’s chest at the sight of it. Surprisingly, Draeya seems to have at least some tolerance for him, even if his slurred speech makes it hard for her to read his lips.

The twins, having escaped Peter’s admonishments, have taken to pickpocketing random guests and betting on how long it will take them to notice. Nancy and Susan have paired up in a corner to watch them, whispering to themselves. They appear to at least thought of the common sense not to mock A and N to their faces, but nobody knows about Alderon’s hearing.

“I didn’t think Garrick was one to take in children of their...caliber,” one of them--Susan, unless he’s wrong--is saying.

“Yeah, well, we also didn’t guess he’d settle for such a tasteless man,” the other whispers. “Those kids could use a mother in their life.”

A steely determination settles in the pit of Alderon’s stomach as he walks up to them. “I apologize for my children,” he says, not bothering to hide the disdain for the two in his voice.

Susan smiles sweetly at him. “Now, what makes you think you need to say that?”

“Missing a ring?” Alderon points out mildly, a polite smile on his face. Nancy’s hand flies up to her face, where Alderon had noticed A slipping it off her finger in a handshake earlier. “You might wish to spend a little less time gossiping and a little more time taking care of your valuables, I would think.”

Susan scoffs, annoyance and perhaps a little bit of suspicion in her eyes. Alderon turns to walk away from the two of them, having made his point.

It only takes a few steps for her to whisper behind his back: “What do you think happened to their faces? Those scars are hideous.”

Turning with a snarl, Alderon snaps, “Susan, I’d rather fancy you spend less time talking and more time drinking. I like you much better that way.”

Her face drops, any pretense of manners gone. Garrick appears behind him, a hand resting on the back of Alderon’s shoulder. His touch is comforting, but a frozen fury is still curling inside him. “Alderon,” he says, his tone calming. “A word, please?” Alderon lets Garrick guide him away, but doesn’t bother hiding the glare he shoots at the two women. Meanwhile, Serah approaches with a jovial attitude, chattering away to distract Susan and Nancy.

Once they’re out of the way, Garrick murmurs, “What happened?”

“They were saying some very nasty things,” Alderon growls. “I cannot believe you invited these people over.”

“I haven’t seen them in years,” Garrick points out. He shifts uncomfortably. “Though maybe that’s the problem. Still, A did steal that ring.”

“If they can’t deal with a simple ring disappearing, then you better hope they do not find out anything else,” Alderon says.

“The night is almost over,” Garrick soothes. He’s using the same voice that he uses on Dewberry when she gets spooked. Alderon would be lying if he said that he didn’t find it as calming as she does. “You can make it until then, right?” The palm of his hand has somehow found its way to the back of Alderon’s neck, which is another comfort.

“If I stay away from those two, perhaps,” he admits grudgingly.

“I’ll make sure they’re sufficiently distracted, then,” Garrick says with a wink. He rubs away the tension in Alderon’s shoulders, a tender look on his face. “I’m sorry. Nancy and Susan have always been a little...well, you know. I didn’t think they’d gotten worse.”

“It is not your fault,” Alderon murmurs, brushing his fingers over Garrick’s cheek. “I know what this means to you. I will find a way to have some...fun.”

“Well, don’t try too hard,” Garrick teases with a grin. “You never know, a little fun might kill you after all these years.” He presses a chaste kiss to Alderon’s lips and steps back. “Go get some food. I’ll distract the terrible terrors. And try to convince A and N to keep their activities to something a little less...aggravating to our guests.”

Three

Serah and Charlie are sitting at the table, each with a plate in front of them. They look up at Alderon’s approach, and seem at least a little happy to see him.

“Alderon,” Serah greets him warmly, standing up and taking his hands for a moment. “I’m so glad you agreed to come, by the way. Have you had any wine yet?”

“No, and I do not plan to,” Alderon says, flashing her a look. The last thing he needs tonight is a witch trying to get him drunk. “How have you been, Charlie?”

The least irritating guest at this party looks up from the cat on his lap. “I’ve been well,” he says, sounding surprised. Whether his shock is at his well-being or the fact that Alderon asked, Alderon can’t tell. “Thanks.”

“How about you?” Serah asks, directing the question back at him. “Are you having a good time tonight?” She pops a grape into her mouth and smirks knowingly, eyes flicking to Nancy and Susan at the other end of the room.

Garrick’s sweet touches and gentle words fill Alderon’s mind. “The night has been… bearable.”

She raises an eyebrow, apparently impressed with his tolerance. But before she can say anything, an intolerably loud voice announces, “Ah, Alderon, there you are. Garrick has told me so much about you.” An overpowering stench, of pigs and alcohol, accompanies the statement. It’s ripe, and assaults Alderon’s heightened senses.

“Ah, Tim,” Serah says, her smile a little tight. “Don’t you have business elsewhere?”

“No, no,” Alderon says, his eyes glinting dangerously. “I would very much like to hear what Garrick has told him.”

Tim’s wet eyes narrow, as if he can’t decide whether or not this is a trap. “Not nearly enough. I was under the impression that you were taller.” He pauses, considering Alderon with the look of a dull man who is ignorant of the danger in front of him. “Not that height has anything to do with skill,” he adds, with a smirk. “Garrick says you have a lot of that, so at least you make up for him there, eh?”

“And what is that supposed to mean?” Alderon says, his voice pitching dangerously low.

Tim shrugs. “He’s never been all that great with his sword work. Sub-par really, especially compared to his mother. And if one doesn’t have skill in the field, one certainly doesn’t have it in bed, I’m sure. Really comes as a disadvantage, don’t you think? Maybe that’s why his Lord gave up on him.”

Alderon moves faster than most people can see, grabbing the collar of Tim’s tunic and forcing him up against a wall. A snarling, feral growl rips its way out of his mouth, and he doesn’t try to quiet it. “You go too far,” he says, one cold hand wrapping around Tim’s throat as he speaks. “Perhaps this will teach you to think before you open your filthy, dishonourable mouth.” Alderon feels his eyes flare a vibrant scarlet, but he’s too furious to care.

Tim’s eyes widen in reaction, and Alderon drops him immediately. The foul man falls to the ground, coughing and red in the face. Alderon backs off, turning his back on him in disgust. The rest of the guests are staring over at the commotion, and Garrick is at the front of the crowd. Alderon can hear Tim gasping behind him, and looks over his shoulder to see him stand up.

One hand clutching at his throat, Tim staggers up and leans a shoulder against the wall. “Are you mad?” he spits, but his vitriol isn’t aimed at Alderon this time. He’s looking past him, at Garrick. “Keeping a bloodsucker around? Do you care nothing for the lives of the people in this room?”

Silence freezes everyone else.

Garrick shoves his way past Alderon to get in Tim’s face. Somehow, his sword is already in hand. Behind him, both A and N stalk forward, their daggers glinting in the torchlight. When Garrick speaks, it’s in a voice so low that Alderon would be surprised if anybody else in the room heard. “You have precisely five seconds to get out of this house before I very personally escort you out.”

Despite being so red a minute earlier, all the color drains from Tim’s face. Inching his way away from Garrick, he stammers, “I--I apologize, Sir Knight, I just--I didn’t--”

“Five. Seconds,” Garrick repeats, leaving no room for debate. Tim trips and stumbles his way toward the door, in a hurry to get out. After he leaves, all eyes are on Garrick. Alderon can’t tear his gaze away from him, not even to tell the twins to put their daggers away, which he knows he should do.

“Party’s over,” Garrick announces in a voice that commands attention and respect, despite its low volume. “Happy holidays, everyone.”

Four

After Garrick’s announcement, he finds a seat and doesn’t talk to anyone. It’s a clear signal that he expects people to leave, and people do. Within less than an hour, the guests are gone from Serah’s home. She assures Garrick and Alderon that she is not upset about the incident, saying that “worse things could have happened.” The walk from her house is cold and dark, and arriving home has never felt as good as it does tonight.

Getting the children to bed is less of an ordeal than it usually is, something for which Alderon is extremely grateful. Though Draeya clings to Alderon’s leg, nervous from the night’s events, the twins eventually coax her away with promises of bedtime stories. They all fall asleep together, after promising Alderon that they’ll protect him no matter what.

Responsibilities taken care of for the night, Alderon and Garrick return to their own room, exhausted. They lay together for awhile, quiet. Then, they both start speaking at once.

“Listen, I--”

“I’m sorry that--”

Alderon hesitates. “You go first.”

“That party sucked. And no, I’m not trying to make a pun. It really sucked. And I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have pushed it.” Garrick twines their fingers together, rubbing his thumb over Alderon’s hand.

“No, I should apologize,” Alderon says, bringing Garrick’s hand up to kiss it. “I did not control myself very well. It was going okay until...me.”

Garrick sits up abruptly and cups Alderon’s face. “Hey, no. All of those people were major assholes. Tim deserved everything he got.” His face twists with disgust at the very name of the man.

“I think we can both agree on that.” Alderon pauses, closing his eyes and enjoying the feeling of Garrick’s hand holding his face. “Back there...when you confronted him...that was…”

Garrick’s hand draws back, causing Alderon to open his eyes and look up at his grimace. “Overboard?”

“Breathtaking.”

Alderon sits up, bold enough to brush Garrick’s lips with his thumb. Even now, after so long, butterflies flit about in his stomach. “Truly a sight to behold,” he continues. “I was...very impressed.”

Garrick’s grin is one Alderon knows well, and he already feels a bit out of his element. He manages to keep himself steady by staring at Garrick’s lips, soft and full and so, so tempting.

“Good to know,” Garrick says, voice husky. “Perhaps I’ll do it more often.”

Alderon’s reply is lost in Garrick’s mouth. A hand tangles itself in his hair and Garrick pushes him to the bed, trailing fiery kisses down his throat. When he makes it back up to Alderon’s lips, he kisses there once--deep and way too satisfying--and says, softly, “I think this is a much better celebration than the party, don’t you?”

“Absolutely.”

“So serious. I can fix that.”

Alderon slides his hands up Garrick’s sides. “Please do.” He brushes his lips over Garrick’s cheek and then, face burning, adds, “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

[kaaramel]

“You understand that you don’t have to put up with them, dear,” Ms. Wickerbottom says gently, stoking the fire and adding another log, to be safe. The blaze crackles merrily, light dancing over the hunched child-figure sitting across the firepit from her. Reflections gleam in eight layers of tapetum lucidum, making his eyes shine disconcertingly in the dim light.

“We don’t mind,” Webber insists, most of their attention focused on the silk bird-trap they’re weaving. He has, of course, an affinity for such things.

“If they say anything that bothers you, please go and tell a responsible adult,” Wickerbottom persists, settling down to her own evening project - a thick sheaf of papyrus to bind into crude books. She mentally reviews the number of people on the island who qualify for the title ‘responsible adult.’ “Well, you can always come tell me.”

“Alright.” He withdraws a little, chin tucked to his furry chest, and focuses harder on the half-made net of silk in their hands. “Ms. Wickerbottom, we understand WX is a jerk, but we really don’t mind talking to them. They haven’t said anything really bad to us.”

Nearly every word out of the automaton’s mouth is either an insult or a demand. Their stance on organic life has been made abundantly clear. They’ve bragged in the past about deriving amusement from feeding Webber dishes made of spider meat, which he eats without comment or complaint. Almost everyone else in camp is fed up with the thing’s antics. Wendy tolerates it because her fascination with death meshes unfortunately well with the robot’s fascination with killing, Wickerbottom tolerates it, the ability to call lightning giving her a bargaining chip of something WX wants.. and here sits Webber, who is unflinchingly polite to the wretched thing.

“We know they’ve got no manners,” Webber says, eyes still focused on the pattern they’re weaving. “And then everyone is rude back.. I didn’t know what manners were before I, you know. Met him.” One of the extraneous spider’s legs issuing from roughly the area of the child’s neck makes a vague gesture pointing at himself.

Ms. Wickerbottom notes the shift in language. 'I,’ not 'we.’ The gesture indicating himself from the neck down.

“Spiders don’t have the language for any of that. The faster stronger spiders get to eat. A big colony can push a smaller nest around if they try to settle in the same territory. That’s how it is. WX thinks they’re the strongest.”

“If they’ve been taking things from you -” Wickerbottom says, trying to follow the thread of the argument.

“No,” Webber says, visibly frustrated, legs waving to cut her off. “No no. WX gives us stuff. Food and toys and stuff they don’t want. I mean I’m telling you the other one is the one with manners who knows how to say things nice. Humans have all these complicated rules and I don’t get them all. WX isn’t human either.”

Through it all Webber’s hands are still steadily working on the last knots of the trap, bending thin, whippy twigs into shape so the tension will help them snap shut on an unsuspecting bird. “WX isn’t nice in the human way but nobody taught them how and they don’t think they have a reason to. He thinks,” another gesture at their body, “we should be very polite and very human and humans won’t be as mad at us. He’s the one who knows how to act human and I let him. I hear the way you talk about spiders.” Eight eyes glassy in the firelight, unreadable. “But you humans help each other. So for you we’re human. WX isn’t human and doesn’t try to act like one. But we think we understand maybe a little.”

It’s disconcerting, talking directly to a spider, if that’s what this is. Wickerbottom isn’t certain whether this is an artifact of the thing’s long association with Webber, or whether all wild spiders have this level of intelligence and analytical ability, and this one merely has the language to fully express itself. She’d spent so long mentally categorizing Webber as a child as human as herself, in deeply unfortunate circumstances and with an appearance he couldn’t help. But if what he was saying now was true, that had been deliberately cultivated.

“Webber, dear,” she began, cautiously. “Or should I call you something else? Webber, are you still..” She cut herself off, unable to phrase the question tactfully. If 'Webber’ had been nothing but a spider skillfully emulating human behavior, did that change relations between them?

“We’re both Webber,” they answered, setting the completed trap aside. “I’m still here, Ms. Wickerbottom. He told you, I’m the one who knows how to be human. I’m sorry if we upset you.”

Wickerbottom is mildly ashamed to feel relief. “You don’t need to apologize, dear.”

“It doesn’t hurt anything to be polite to WX.” Webber fidgets, now, with nothing to occupy his hands. “That’s okay, isn’t it? They might never learn how themself but the other part of me, he’s learning a little from watching what I do.”

“It’s not your job to civilize every nonhuman in the wilderness, dear child, but it’s very kind of you to think of WX-78 that way.” Few enough people do, certainly. It seems to cheer Webber up to hear that, in any case.

“Thank you, Ms. Wickerbottom,” they say, rising to their feet with the completed bird-trap in their hands. Night is falling rapidly, as always, starless darkness closing in around the campfire. “We’re going to set this with the others, and then maybe go to sleep, unless you’ve got questions.”

“Go right ahead, Webber,” she insists, waving him off. Questions can wait until morning, especially if he’s tired. “Good night, dear.”

“Good night.”

Carefully, by firelight, she scratches crude quill pen-on-papyrus notes on the ecology of the island, and speculations on nonhuman psychology.

[saofic-blog]

rating: M for some pretty graphic violent descriptions o_o;;;

word count: 4400

fandom: homestuck post-game feferi-is-empress alternia (entirely original character focused) 

"the fuck.  are you doing here again," is the first thing your little indigo not-brother says to you.

rude, honestly.  you've been messaging him every time you remember to for the past, like, sweep and a half.  

on the other hand, he did recognize you on sight, which is kind of flattering.  you've forgotten more trolls than you've laid ganderbulbs on, probably.  but you suppose you do stand out.  most trolls still lump you into a class labeled "subjugglator" or "clown" with zero personal data attached, though, which is as it should be.

"awww, labrynth," you croon, forgoing traditional address in favor of not spending your first several hours here engaged in brisk strifing.  "and me having volunteered to get stuck here personal and all!"

he gives you A Look.  you can't quite interpret it on account of mostly having gotten to know him through rather acerbic (on his end) text conversations.  it involves glaring up at you through a curtain of hair and eyelashes and a little tic at the corner of his mouth.  it's funny as shit.

"you get the rare pleasure of my company for at least a perigree, probably," you add, just about purring, watching his face.  sure enough, his eyes go wide, a little crackle of 'voodoos picking up as his pupils expand.

he doesn't go for you with steel, though, which you were ready to equip specibus in the event of.  just breathes in real deep, pinning his ears back and clenching his fists until you expect to see blood dripping over his fingers.  he's such a pretty color.  you're almost looking forward to it.

"… fine," he says, after the kind of pause that you've used to make many a troll get all fidgety and escape-minded.  it's hard to tell if he's doing it on purpose, though.  "are you done harassing me? because some of us have actual jobs to do on this ship."

"aww, little brother," you coo (watch his hands crook into claws but still no reach for the strife deck yet).  "'m not harassin' you! just wanna get my jam on how you been gettin' on."

... aaaand, yeah, there you go, his eyes light up all reddish and that rattling, subsonic growl kicks in.  quadrants, especially pale, are a hella sore spot, you've found.  and he can't block you in real life!! you are positively gleeful.

he still doesn't attack you, though, which is a surprising amount of self control.  you guess on a mixed ship like this he can't just go around accidentally culling anyone not tough enough to stand up to him when he's a little peeved. instead he just turns on his heel and stalks off in the opposite direction, leaking psychic ruination like he wants everyone around him even more miserable than he is.

boy doesn't know how to motherfucking chill at all.

you'd be bored of him by now if he did, though.

===================================

==> be the angry troll.

you get nearly halfway back to the training bay before you even realize that aaeren – subjugglator aaustere – is fucking following you.  you'd lost the chill of her presence somehow in the overwhelming ice that had gone down through your spine when she'd – said that.  about jamming.  your head is full of roaring static and you just.  don't fucking.  know what to do with her.  there are very few trolls who hang around long when you get like this.

nobody likes when you do inspection like this, either, but if someone fucking passes out again you're getting them transferred off your crews posthaste.  better now than in combat, you suppose.

thinking about logistics quiets the screaming quite a lot, though, until your shoulders are almost back to normal and your chest's not all seized up and fizzing.

"run out of juice already?" subjugglator aaustere asks.  she doesn't even have the grace to be snide about it, she's just matter-of-fact and curious.  you bristle back up at her automatically.  

"ah, okay.  just calmed down, then.  shit, brother, you got no control to speak of, do you?"

you just.  hate it when she says that.  so fucking much.  you hate everyone else your own color indiscriminately in this moment.  you hate yourself.  your pan crackles and screams with it.  you breathe, and do not go for your strife deck.

"i have a metric goddamn shit ton of control, sister," you hiss at her, feeling your eyes burn despite yourself.  "or there would be a sight more trolls on this ship who'd be mother.  fucking.  dead."

you're not looking at her, but you can feel her still hovering back there, big and dark and looming with her stark fucking creepy clown paint.

"uh, yeah, sure, but like.  you ain't controlling them chucklevoodoos for shit," she says.  "like, weren't you never schoolfed on how to use that shit proper?"

of course you weren't – you wriggled out of any possibility of being put in contact with (him) other indigos by shuffling your way down into the blueblood echelons of training, where honestly nobody ever told you no and you didn't hardly faze your fellow students most of the time.  but you're not going to tell her that.  you've told her way too much over the time she's been hassling you since you met, anyway.

aaeren seems to read it out of your mutinous silence, anyway.  fuck her.

"okayyy," she drawls in that half-purring way of hers.  "y'know i am here for, like, ever, right?  i could teach you."  

"fuck you," you snap, "you're like a third my age."

"that is true," she purrs.  "i'm also impeccable at psychic control, unlike some assholes in this corridor i could name, being as i've actually been schoolfed on chucklevoodoos and you ain't."

god, you don't actually have anything to say to that, fuck.  

"i hate you so much," you growl at her before you can think better of it.  she stops for a moment, then bursts out laughing, that loud, rolling cackle of hers that's like a terrible cross between a scolding cluckbeast and a laughscavengerbeast.  

"sorry, brother, i just don't swing that way," she says, after a moment, through giggles.

"not that way!!" you snap.  (never, never with an  indigo.)

"also, don't you already have a kismesis?"

"no," you hiss.  shit's not official.  probably it will never be official. you have a guy who you fucking hate and sometimes he lets you pail his brains out and the rest of the time you find someone else to pail and he doesn't even care, fuck him, fuck him so much.  you're growling again, like an embarrassed wriggler.  why won't this fucking bitch leave you alone, no one else seems to have a problem doing that.

"yeah, sure, okay," aaeren says, aspirating more laughter.  you don't have fucking time for this.  you are going to fly completely off the handle if this keeps up and you do.  not.  have.  time. you hiss a long breath out through your fangs and start walking again, faster than before.  because you're going to be late, not to get away, since she's got a good foot or so on you and it's not like you're going to lose her like this.

there is approximately twenty meters of merciful silence.

"so, like," she says, and it takes everything you have to keep the scream just inside your head.  

"yeah, that, see," she says.  "don't do that.  calm your horns."  and suddenly her grinning face cuts right in front of yours, her hands just the lightest feather touch on your shoulders.

you bite her mouth.  it's habit, it's instinct; you are so fucking angry you're almost turned on despite yourself and she's right there.

she yanks right back, claws going up to the gouge in her lip, bright against the black paint.  

"ow," she says mildly.  "seriously, bro, i'm not interested."

"no one will find your body," you hiss at her.  you want to claw her until your pulling the bones out of her flesh and joints, slam heavy blades through soft gray-purple flesh until there's nothing fucking left but lines of fillets fit for a gourmeterminist refrigerator.

"ooohh, that's a good one," aaeren says, shivering a little.  "if you can get that kind of detail going, you should be able to turn it off," she says.  "just like.  seriously.  literally.  calm your horns.  if they're buzzing, find it and make it stop."

she has to be fucking kidding you.

"you have to be fucking kidding me," you say.  she frowns a little, one of the first times you've actually seen her do so.  "you don't think i've tried?  it's not --- "  the entirety of you is full of icy, screaming static, it fills up your thorax and your throat until it cottons your mouth and makes your skull skitter and throb, there's never any fucking way to fucking.  'keep it out of your horns,' what the fuck.

"so what you're telling me," aaeren says, with a look of dawning wonder that makes the static screech like an interrupted radio signal behind your sternum.  "is that you ain't got the emotional control of a goddamn ten-sweep-old."

you grit your teeth so hard you'd swear you're going to grind the points off them.

"go. the fuck.  away," you say, staring her straight in the eye for once and itching for violence, for kissing her, for her blood on the walls and your claws.

she stands perfectly still, watching you, like she's waiting for you to pull strife on her.  probably she is.  well, fuck her and fuck you too, you have a goddamn job to do and time, time, time. you don't have any for this, still, that hasn't stopped being a thing no matter how much you want her dead right now.  hell, you might even regret it later if you killed her, there's a thought.  (nobody other than clorîn has bothered to spend so much time talking to you in... a long time.)

"all right," she says, and dodges neatly around you.  "catch you later, bro."

you swallow against the huge, hot lump of your rage in your throat rather than engage her more.  don't give them what they want.  

"don't think you're shut of me!" she calls as her curtain of hair sweeps around the bend in the corridor.  an ominous sense of foreboding echoes along with her voice.

you don't necessarily remember your training inspection that night.  you know from afterwards that three newer recruits of the olive and teal persuasion did faint and were summarily switched off your roster.  you only injured two, both captains who had agreed to a demonstration.  no one was dead, even the fucking rogue subjugglator who instigated your frothing rage in the first place.

all in all, you don't know what this bitchy-ass fish admiral has to complain about regarding your conduct.

"liithi, you can't keep doing this to your crews!!" he says, voice rough and upset, fins snapping as he paces up and down the length of his adminisblock.  you continue to sit on the edge of his desk and try to ignore how much you need to fuck him over it.  you never should have told him your hatchname.

"doing what?" you sneer.  "i didn't even cull any of them."

"you-- ugh!!" dmitri rasps as words fail him, as they often do.  he doesn't even growl or otherwise communicate to fill the silence, which has you doing it instead.  literally anyone else would be kissing you by now.  he won't, because he called you to his adminisblock instead of his respiteblock, so he wants to be professional.

sure enough, he sits down in one of the chairs in front of his desk, like he doesn't even register taking up the side of the petitioner.  it probably helps that even with you on top of the desk, his head still clears your shoulders.  

"you can't keep – driving out the midbloods like that.  getting rid of them just because they faint or whatever.  ugh, just.  why do you have to be such a fucking casteist asshole?" and by the end of that he's snarling, too, fins pinned back and glaring up at you like you've done something wrong. fuck him fuck him fuck him so much, you hate him so much it's hot in the pit of your gut and just.  augh.

it occurs to you, in the snapping ice of your anger and heat of your hate, though, that you've finally had it spelled out to you why this happens.  you'd just assumed before that you kept getting fucking sensitive delicate flowers added to your ranks.  but, no, if what aaeren was just ribbing you about is true, then you are just. unintentionally psychically steamrolling everyone around you and only the absolute most adamantine-tough ones remain.

no wonder you have such a high concentration of cerulean and ultramarine blues in your upper echelons.

you scowl at the floor instead of dmitri's face, and dmitri's growl simmers out as he realizes you've stopped.  (dmitri's talkative little yellowblood matesprit once remarked on how creepy you two were, with all your long, fraught, stilted silences in conversation. you'd thrown something back about how sometimes, people thought before they spoke, what a fucking concept.)

"... it's not.  on purpose," you grit out at last.  "okay? look, you're like.  more fucking psychic immune than most anyone short of the empress, right."

dmitri inclines his head a slow fraction of a centimeter, eerily vivid pinky-violet eyes fixed on you.  (both of you just barely on the edge of the next caste up; both of you so desperately struggling to adhere lower than you should to make up for that.)

"well. i," you stumble, and hate that you have to do this in front of him, but he is your commanding officer as well as – well.  "fuck. i've been recently-- very recently-- ... made aware ... that i may be a significantly higher-rated psychic than i thought i was."

you can see dmitri's eyebrows drawing down out of the corner of your eye and are electric with impulse for a long, burning second – if he says anything i swear i will rip him apart and drink all of his blood until it passes through my shitty excuse for gills and i drown. he doesn't, though, just frowns at your glare and holds your eyes now that he has them.  you try to remember, yet again, how to breathe.

"also," you say, stiffly.  "also, i may be.  accused of lacking training.  in control.  apparently."

"where are you going with this?" dmitri asks, giving every impression of being honestly confused instead of having the decency to put two and two together.  

"i mean i'm not targeting them, you stupid fucker, i've been accidentally fucking chucklevoodooing," (god you hate that word, fuck you hate the stupid fucking clown cult) "the whole damn lot of them pretty much as long as you've been alive, allright, and so if the only goddamn ones that last are the most fucking psychic-resistant and therefore least likely to fucking go down from backlash in the middle of fucking BATTLE then that's just how it goes, OKAY?! the color shit is a side-effect of physiological tendencies in the hemospectrum, do you need me to fucking spell it out any clear than that?"

you're on your feet, you're panting, your eyes and throat burning from screeching there at the end, and you're-- fucking-- crying-- again-- because fuck your entire life whenever you get angry and the lacrimal response goes into overdrive.

dmitri has softened down so much you suspect he's flipping on you.  bastard doesn't even know how to do pitch right, that subjugglator bitch doesn't know what the shit she's talking about with 'kismesis.'

"oh. kay," dmitri says slowly.  "okay.  um, fair.  that's.  a different picture of the situation.  i, um.  kind of wish you'd told me that ten sweeps ago, but we weren't... as close, then."

you snort indignantly at his use of "close," the soft sentimental asshold.  you're not going to deal with him again until he's over that hoofbeastshit.  he glares at you for that, which is a nice start.  it's not hard to get people to dislike you; all  you have to do is be honest for five minutes.  (which does beg the question of what the fuck is wrong with aaeren. is she damaged?  well, she is a clown.)

"i told you," you grumble, though, in the favor of scrupulous honesty.  "i didn't – fucking.  realize before."

"what brought it to attention?"

"you have a subjugglator infestation on your ship somehow, is what."

"i-- what--- oh, you mean vitiator aaustere?" dmitri says.

"yes, i fucking mean aaustere," you hiss.  god, he's stupid sometimes. "i went through training with mostly blues.  there wasn't a problem until i got transferred here and you keep trying to pile fucking mid and lowbloods on my ships for your stupid fucking diversity quotient."

"everyone i've tried transferring to you has been perfectly capable!!  there's no fucking reason to keep warmbloods out of higher command, it's so fucking stupid, there's way more of them than there are of us, there are so many probable geniuses being left to drudge around cleaning shit just because--"

"oh my fuck dmitri, i've heard it before," you growl over him.  "blah, blah, fucking blah, it doesn't change that if they go down when i'm in a bad mood then you're asking to get them killed."

"i could get you transferred out, then," dmitri says, glacial, giving you a gimlet eye over.  "it sounds like you're the problem, after all."

for a moment, you can't contain y our emotional response to that – unexpected hurt, shock, and the instant volcanic detonation of pure fury-- he would dare-- you'll kill him first.  see how unworthy or how much of a problem he'll think you are when he's a pulped fucking carcass in your teeth--! you're making some kind of unholy noise amalgamated from a hiss, growl, and scream and it tears at your throat the same way the rage burns up all your insides and tears at your shell, like venom overflowing through your pores; you'll choke on it if you try to swallow it back so you just scream, incoherent, wordless.

dmitri actually rocks back a step like you've hit him, with a sharp intake of breath and eyes wide and gold-and-black barely rimmed in sizzling violet.

you're going to kill him.

dmitri strikes like a snake, killing-fast, grappling you to the floor and twisting to avoid your teeth, claws, horns; you're faster and more experienced but he's stronger and so much bigger, more than twice your size-- until he's got you on your front with arms nearly twisted out of their sockets.  you scream again, short and sharp, when he shoves and one of them does go.

the pain is hot and shocking and grounds you, acid bubbling up in your thinkpan to replace the actinic fire whiting you out.  

"you can't get rid of me," you pant, rough, gagging a little at the pressure of his weight on your diaphragm and your poundingly dislocated arm.  "you think you'll get any other ground-certified commander who isn't a casteist douchebag? fuck the-- ngk-- next one you get... will probably... be a genocide-happy-- extremist-- to boot.  they usually are."

"i could just cull you right here," dmitri says, deep and flat and cold as the ocean floor.  

you are irrationally betrayed.  "do it, then!!!" you hiss,  "DO IT, MOTHERFUCKER," (you have the queerest thought, removed from the part of you that knows you're about to die, that you've been talking too much with aaeren, she's infected you with that stupid fucking clown lingo, you're using it even on people that aren't her), "GET IT THE FUCK OVER WITH," and oh, god, fuck, you're crying again, choking on the sounds and gross purple-tinted tears dripping into the carpet.

.

he doesn't, of course.

.

dmitri artiev is too fucking soft to cull even an out-of-control wreck like you, even when he should, when anyone else would.

.

he lets you up, instead, lets go of you and backs off all at once, and you whine as your bad arm yanks even further out of place when gravity pulls it back down. you drag yourself up to your knees and have to grab for the edge of his desk to get to your feet as soon as possible.  how the fuck are you this atrociously weak right now, you've taken far worse in the field and not even noticed it.

in the field, of course, nobody is wringing your thinkpan raw through the grater of emotions.  god, you hate this guy, so fucking much.  your ribs creak under the force of your choked back sobs.  you hate him for seeing you like this and you hate him more because he'll find it piteous rather than contemptible.  you're torn between the idea of assassinating him quietly later today while he sleeps and fucking him until he's raw meat beneath your fangs.

"... you're on leave until further notice," dmitri says, finally. you can almost hear his thoughts edge around, "you need a moirail," but at least he didn't say it.  you'd tried to kill him the last time he said that, and you're in no shape to try that again right now.

instead he just stares at you some more, solemn and statuesque, until he gives up and says, "dismissed," and effectively herds you out of his office.  

"and go get that arm fixed!" he snaps at you as he closes the door on you.  wow, fuck him.  

you head in the direction of the med bay anyway, because you are actually not ten sweeps old, thanks very much.  you feel empty and worn and full of sharp gravel.  tonight is the worst.

because tonight is the worst, you get to the mediculler's station and don't notice until it's too late that it's clorîn's goddamn moirail on duty at the desk.

of course.  

===================================

==> be the fish admiral

your name is dmitri artiev and your kismesis is the worst.

which, sure, yeah, is probably what everyone says about their kismesis, but, like.  you're kind of a little sure yours is also, like.  a bad kismesis.  your moirail is definitely trying to convince you to break up with him.

honestly, after the debacle you just went through, you're kind of thinking she probably has a point.

"dmitri. seriously.  trying to kill you is not the height of black romance, that's unhealthy bullshit spread by sensationalized media," mitral grumps, poking you in the gills.

"ow," you protest mildly, covering the spot under attack with your arms. "he wasn't really--"  mitral looks up at you, horns tossed back and clouds of black hair everywhere, and you give up on that line of defense pretty quick.  "it's not like i can't handle him," you say instead.

even if you're feeling a little bruised and anxious and panicky, more so than normal.  even if the memory of liithi's face as he'd screamed, contorted with rage and eyes blazing scarlet (you don't even know what set him off), the way he'd launched himself at you all teeth and claws and intent on death, keeps haunting you.  you'd still pinned him down and you think you might have broken his arm; liithi is just so tiny, barely more than rustblood-sized, and you don't know your own strength, you never have.

"stop." mitral's hand hits your face.  you almost startle away from her, but she's got you by the arm, too.  "stop looking guilty. i can see you working yourself up a parsec away."

"he didn't even hurt me, mitral.  i just.  i grabbed him before he'd even hardly made a move, i don't even know why, i just panicked and... went for him.  and he screamed and when i let him up his arm was just hanging there all wrong--"

"okay," mitral says.  "okay.  shhhhhshhhshh.  hey.  dmitri, that's good, okay, like, with him, if you didn't listen to your instincts and preempt him he'd probably actually have killed you by now, that guy is certified grade-a 'why isn't he a subjugglator clown' level crazy, okay?  like i know you're tired of hearing me say this but i do not trust that guy, and if you insist on keeping this up with him then i'm glad you're keeping yourself safe."

you nod miserably at her and she strokes her fingers over your jawline, up and down until finally your shoulders loosen up and you can release the breath you've been holding.  

"c'mon," she says.  "it's late, lets go to 'coon and we can talk about this more in the evening.  don't you dare go see him again until i'm done with you, though, you hear me!?"

"i don't think he'd want to see me, anyway," you agree miserably. mitral pats your face just a little too hard and shoves you toward the ablution block.  she tries to fumble the catches of your necklaces while you're both in motion.  you laugh a little, breathlessly, at the ridiculous awkwardness of the slow crabwalk this forces the two of you into.  you can see mitral grinning at you in the mirror when the ablution block light flips on.

this is so much easier.  with mitral and riiouh you never have to go through that kind of row.  you wouldn't even want a kismesis at all most of the time; conflict makes you so, glaringly unhappy.  but liithi just gets under your skin like no one else.  it's like, he seems like just another blue-indigo-violet highblood asshole most of the time, but then he'll turn around and seem like he might actually be a decent person somewhere way under there?  and then he's being an imperialist warmonger again and it drives you up. the.  walls.

mitral shoves a fang-scrubbing brush in your hands, kickstarting you into actually doing morning ablutions.  she peels both of you out of your clothes when your done and climbs into the recuperacoon after you, crooning a little off-tune song and thumbing your horns until you f inally, mercifully, stop thinking about liithi.  she's that perfect kind of lukewarm against you for as crammed as you two make the recuperacoon (mitral might only come up to your shoulders but.  you are pretty goddamn tall and she is no tiny slip of a troll like your concupiscent quadrants).

"... salt and stars," you mumble at her, drowsily, so that the last thing you hear before drifting off is her laughing and saying, "sugar and suns," back at you.