#i really am enjoying this novel
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"Darling!" Archer said—and suddenly the same black abyss yawned before him and he felt himself sinking into it, deeper and deeper, while his voice rambled on smoothly and cheerfully
--Edith Wharton; The Age of Innocence
#yeah thats exactly what its like#i really am enjoying this novel#The Age of Innocence#Edith Wharton#literature#since someone might be interested:#it's a comedy of manners about rich ppl in the 1870s#mostly of a guy realizing his life & the lives of the ppl around him esp the women are all shallow & meaningless#because theyre all more interested in manners and the newest fashion and avoiding scandal than in doing anything real#that doesn't sound like a comedy but it is in that subtle social satire way#i want to group it in with jane austen but i think ppl who are too into jane austen would stab anyone who dared say such a thing
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fluorescent shrimp
#i wanted to draw the evolver gun but i couldn't find any refs with a good angle#normal gun will have to do#in any case i wanted to draw this like 2 weeks ago when i started playing the first game#but then i couldn't stop playing it and ended up finishing it at 1 am last saturday#and then i tried to sleep right after but i couldn't bc i wanted to play nirvana initiative so badly#so then i stayed up from then on until sunrise playing the second game#just beat it the other day#didn't like it as much as the first game but i still really enjoyed it#also this marks the second year in a row where i become obsessed with a duology of visual novels and play them in under two weeks#(last year was dgs)#my grades briefly plummeted as a result but they're ok now lol#ai the somnium files#aitsf#aiba#my art
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Big Sky Ranch
Kristanna Modern AU Rated: M WC: 1829
In the foothills off of the Rocky Mountains, resides a generational Ranch known to all in the area. Kristoff, a humble hand on that ranch, works hard and enjoys his simple existence. It isn't until a new woman starts at the diner that be begins to acknowledge his loneliness and plans to ask her on a date. When his plans are foiled by a rival group of men, it sets events into motion that plunge Anna and Kristoff into getting to know each other through some very unexpected situations and their relationship blossoms as their lives begin to change.
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A/N: This had been my passion project for over a year, and is the most self-indulgent thing I have ever written. It is inspired by the ranch setting of Yellowstone and the rural area in which I live.
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Anna had only been working as a waitress at the diner for a week, and she was quickly learning what the biggest perk of the job was.
It was the cowboys.
She’d moved to the small town only a month prior, desperate to get as far away from the city where her sleazy ex-fiancé was. It was the fresh start she needed after wallowing about that cheating asshole for months. Truly dark times they had been.
After finding a basement suite to rent since she wasn’t sure how long she would be there before she moved on again, she got the job at the diner, and was truly starting to enjoy life again. And that was in large part due to the clientele.
The town was surrounded by ranchlands. Large farms spread out in all directions, and the roads were ruled by pick-up trucks and farm equipment. Many times, Anna had gone for a drive to clear her head and she’d come upon some large tractor-thing, and she’d have to squeeze around the slow-moving vehicle in the wrong lane, or wait until it pulled into a pasture. Even so, she never minded too much, because she enjoyed the drives and admiring the lovely scenery against the backdrop of the Rocky Mountains.
And every day, rain or shine, groups of men came in for breakfast or lunch. Most of them in the full cowboy outfit; cowboy boots, jeans, roper or plaid shirts, and cowboy hats. And no matter the size or shape of them, they were all ruggedly handsome in their own ways.
And decent! Anna had never met so many decent men. They were all extremely polite and respectful. They held doors and said ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ and ‘ma’am’, and they always tipped generously even if they only had a cup of coffee and a piece of pie.
Anna truly did love her job, even if was a lot harder work than sitting behind a desk all day like she’d been doing when she worked at that insurance company with her ex.
That asshole could rot in hell.
Now Anna had her eyes open for a cowboy. A lot of them didn’t wear any wedding rings, but that didn’t mean that they weren’t married. She’d asked one of the other waitresses and was told they don’t wear them for safety, not wanting them to get caught in ropes or machinery. And the ones that did wear them, wore those new rubber ones that could break if they got caught in something. It made perfect sense to Anna. Although it certainly made it harder to tell who was and wasn’t attached.
Which was why for the time being she just had her eyes open. She never outwardly hit on any of them for fear of hitting on a taken man. She just hoped that one day, one of them might just ask her out. And until then, she would more than happily take in all the eye candy.
*****
Kristoff yawned as he got out of his truck and stretched out his tired back. Him and Sven got up extra early and treated themselves to breakfast whenever they could, and right now they had a short break before calving season when their days were a little less long.
The air was still chilly with the last of winter’s tenuous hold, and their breath came out in white vapors as they walked through the parking lot. At least the snow was mostly all gone, and while that meant that him and Sven’s work load was going to ramp up, it was hard to argue with the sun shining bright after six brutally long months of snow-covered ground.
As soon as they stepped into the diner, Sven gave him a nudge with his elbow.
“New girl,” he said under his breath, and flicked his head in her direction as they walked to a booth along the front windows.
Kristoff glanced her direction then turned to Sven and gave him a hard stare. Ever since he got engaged, Sven had been trying mercilessly to set Kristoff up with someone and it was starting to get on his nerves. The girl was really cute, sure, he just wasn’t interested. He was too damn set in his ways to be interested.
They sat in their favourite booth, took off their cowboy hats, and set them on the seat beside themselves. Kristoff ran a hand through his hair a few times, shaking out the hat line, and the new waitress came over straight away and set menus on the table.
“Morning, gentlemen.” She smiled brightly. “What can I start you out with today?”
“Coffee, black, and a water,” Kristoff said.
“Same here,” Sven said, “please.”
“Coming right up.” She gave them another bright smile and walked away.
“City girl,” Sven mused.
“Yup.” He’d heard her accent too.
“She don’t have a ring.”
“Sven-”
“Come on, man. You livin’ like that ain’t healthy. All alone in that cabin. You should move back to one of the main houses.”
“You know I don’t like being around people too much.”
“You like being around me.”
“Yeah, well, you’re the one exception and you know that too.”
“You could make another exception,” Sven flicked his head to the counter where she was pouring them coffee, “for her.”
“If you don’t cut this out, I’m gonna strap you to that nasty old bull out in the east pastures.”
“Ole’ Bruce?” Sven laughed. “That bull don’t got any fight left in him.”
“I beg to differ,” Kristoff stated. It was only a month ago that mean old brute had him scrambling for the fences when he charged Kristoff. And of course, no one had been around to see it and they all told him he was making shit up. That bull had it out for him, Kristoff knew it.
The waitress came back with the drinks and they ordered their usual; the cowboy breakfast. It came with two eggs, three strips of bacon, a pair of sausages, hash browns, beans and two slices of toast. Both him and Sven would eat it all and be starving by noon.
They ate quickly and Kristoff pulled his wallet out of his back pocket since it was his turn to pay. The waitress came back with the bill and a card machine which Kristoff waived off because he always paid with cash. He gave her a pretty nice tip since she’d kept their water and coffee cups full. He hated it when he was halfway through his meal and he had nothing to drink because the cups weren’t topped off.
On the way out, when Sven wasn’t looking, Kristoff glanced in the waitress’s direction. She had her copper hair in braids, and actually, was very attractive. He always had been a sucker for freckles. If he was interested in a relationship, he might ask her out, but he was more than content not having to deal with what came in having that sort of thing.
*****
Anna watched the pair of cowboy’s head back to their big dually in the parking lot. They’d been the best-looking ones yet. Especially that blond with the big nose and the pretty brown eyes. He was very handsome. And built! The guy’s biceps were giving that roper shirt a serious quality control test. She felt a little flustered to suddenly think about what being with a man like that would be like. Her ex had been on the skinnier side and nowhere near as tall. Not to mention never really left her satisfied. She had a feeling that the handsome blond cowboy sure wouldn’t disappoint.
He didn’t really say much, he left her a very nice tip, and he did say thank you when she dropped off their breakfast, even if he didn’t say please when he ordered it. Anna hoped she’d see him again soon and found herself hoping that he was single and looking.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Sven suggested breakfast again the next morning and Kristoff damn well knew why. Still, it was hard to argue against a big brekky that he didn’t have to make himself. They drove to the diner and sure enough, the attractive waitress was working.
They sat in the same booth and she came over a moment later with coffees and waters. It impressed him a little that they didn’t have to order, even if was presumptuous of her.
“Same as yesterday, gentlemen?” she asked, after she’d set their drinks on the table.
“You bet,” Sven answered.
“And are we sticking with sunny-side up eggs and rye toast?” Both men nodded. “Perfect. I’ll have that right out to you.”
Kristoff found himself watching her walk away. She sure had a nice smile. Very friendly. Good for getting better tips for sure. And those eyes were something else.
“You should ask her out,” Sven persisted in a hushed voice.
He turned to Sven and scowled. “No.”
“Why not?”
Kristoff shrugged and couldn’t really come up with a good answer.
Sven heaved a big sigh. “You know what, I give up. You’re hopeless.”
Kristoff sneered. “Like you pointed out, she’s a city girl. Only one way a relationship with her is gonna end up, and that’s me being dumped after a week.”
“Maybe if you would just try-”
“That’s enough,” he said, very serious. “I’m not in the mood.”
Sven scoffed. “Fine, whatever.”
Kristoff looked down at his hands and started to dig some dirt out from under his thumbnail. Sven had no idea what he was talking about. Kristoff had always tried. He did his best, even though he was pretty damn clueless about romance. Which seemed to be why none of the ladies he’d gone out with stuck around long. He did try, and it was never enough. It had left him jaded about dating.
Their meals came out quickly and they ate even quicker to get a head start on their day. It was going to be another long one, meaning come Friday night, both of them would be more than eager to blow off some steam at the saloon.
*****
Anna gathered up the tip the other cowboy had left on the table. It was still very decent even if he wasn’t as generous as the blond. Neither of the men seemed like they were looking for a date, so Anna gave up on thinking that either of them were single. Like most of them, they were probably taken, leaving Anna wondered what she had to do to bag herself a cowboy.
Another waitress had been talking about going to a saloon by the highway at the edge of town on Friday evening for some dancing and asked Anna if she wanted to tag along too. She accepted, giddy at the chance that perhaps she might have her opportunity there to get herself a date, even if she was warned that the crowd could get pretty rowdy.
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Next Chapter
#Big Sky Ranch#Cee wrote this mess#kristanna#kristoff#anna#kristanna modern au#I am not going to list all the trigger warnings#this fic is novel length and there are too many to put on here#as always read at your own risk#i 1000% wrote this for myself and decided to share#if you read it I really hope you enjoy
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I'm like halfway through the first Ghoulfriends book and main three are so annoying. I'm hoping it's like a character flaw thing, where they'll recognize it and get better over the course of the series, but oof. Gitty did these ghouls so wrong.
They're beefing with Cleo for no reason...Venus flipped out on her out of nowhere (in the middle of class, unprovoked!!) for using paper bags and then sprayed her with hypno pollen, meanwhile Rochelle, who is in her own relationship, is hardcore flirting with her man!!! I wish the author had been more original when it came to giving them a "frenemy" there are so many options aside from Cleo! (Honestly Operetta would have been an interesting choice, but whatever)
Robecca's characterization is the most tolerable, but she's incredibly rambly, and the author decided to give her a bad sense of time for...reasons. And despite being British, she uses oddly Southern phrases while talking...its super strange. With Venus and Rochelle, I can see where her mind went with writing their characters, but Robecca honestly seems so opposite to her canon personality.
And her backstory was kinda mangled too. It's acknowledged that she was disassembled, and recently reassembled, and even that she previously lived with Mrs. Kindergrubber, but she's treated like a brand new student. No acknowledgement that it was Ghoulia who put her back together!
I understand giving the characters a fresh take, but it would have been pretty simple to integrate the actual canon. Robecca and Rochelle were introduced in the same movie, they were new to Monster High, just not new to all of the characters.
#monster high#monster high gen 1#monster high novels#ghoulfriends forever#oh and this author also describes cleo as coffee colored#can i just say that i fully expected to enjoy these#like i am kinda having fun hating on them but i bought all 4 at once lol...had i known they were so bad id have stopped at the first#and dont get me wrong i think rochelle's crush on deuce is really cute and interesting generally#but i did not expect her to be so upfront about it!#at the very least i expected her to be single lol!#every time i read robecca's dialogue its in a different accent#british australian or southern#ill probably use this post as a thread for my thoughts as i continue reading#i really thought these would be more like the Monster High Diaries books#those are so good in comparison...#text post#bad as they are i dont regret buying them#the covers are pretty and the illustrations#plus im happy to have all the gen 1 novel series
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Have I ever consumed any official content of svsss? No. Do I even have the faintest idea about what is and is not canon? Also no. But I firmly believe yall ain't making Mobei Jun pathetic enough. I have no evidence as to why but gut instinct. He is equally pathetic as he is stoic. His poise and regalness are simply a facade, outside of the professionalism his position demands, that man does not know how to efficiently communicate or convey his emotions. That man is perpetually second guessing himself in social situations but he does a good job of hiding it.
Anyways the fanfics in the svsss fandom are immaculate.
#svsss#mobei jun#i am throughly enjoying my time here as clueless as i am#the fanart and fics are enough to satisfy me#i dont really have the time rn to figure out where to even start with offical svsss content#is it a novel? a game? a webtoon??#i dont even know#but ive been consuming fan content for 3 weeks now and im eating good
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y'know what's funny in a 'not really funny at all but i have to laugh or i'll start biting people' kind of way??
the adaptation team working overtime to make the relationship between javier and lloyd look so much less deeper than it actually is in the novel makes the novel look so much gayer than it already did on its own. like. sorry but your attempts to cover up the homoerotism just makes it stand out more in its absence.
because if there truly was nothing remarkable about lloyd and javier's relationship and they were just very good friends and nothing else then why take the time and effort to change it in the adaptation so they look less close than they actually are.
why skip entire scenes that make their relationship deeper. why change their dialogue and thoughts so they're less invested in one another. why give interactions that they had with each other to their romantic interests. actually why give javier a whole new love interest that did not exist in the novel.
why go through so much trouble to change something that is so important in the source material if there truly was nothing else going on in the novel.
what was it about their relationship that made the adaptation team decide they just needed to change everything about it so they weren't as close and attached as they were originally.
if they were truly nothing but platonic with each other in the source material then why change their relationship so much in the adaptation that it's almost unrecognizable.
what about it did they find so unappealing that they simply had to modify it until it was but a shadow of itself.
in trying to cover up something they only managed to call attention to it by the people who knew what was there originally. now we know that they wanted to get rid of it so badly they were willing to butcher the story and plot for it.
it's really funny :)
#i talk a lot <3#it's such a shame what happened with this webcomic#i loved it so much. people who were here since the beginning probably remember how excited i was every thursday it came out#i would wait until 1 am to read it as soon as it dropped!#now i can't even stand to read the new episodes#i'm so sad you guys#and i hate to sound like a conspiracy theorist but like. c'mon.#anyway. read the novel i promise it's so much better and you will enjoy it a lot more if you're actually looking for a good story#and not just weird faces to laugh at#i'm not gonna main tag this one. it's really bitter and i don't wanna put that where people who actually like the webtoon will see it lol
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biggest downside of not having many experiences or meeting many people is not having anything to feed into the art machine
#i think this is what i really mean when i say i dont have the artist's mind#i like drawing and am learning to enjoy how i draw#but beneath the lines i dont really know how to make anything meaningful#i wish i could experience the brain of another artist for this reason like#i didnt do much as a kid didnt watch or play many things didnt meet many people i read quite#a bit but nothing really stuck never learned much in school bc id always just draw#is this why i have nothing even now at 26 living almost the same life?#i cant cobble together a story or background for my characters i cant make stuff that Means anything#i always talk also about how i fear finding a partner bc my stuff is just 99% self indulgent sanity keeping work#idk what id make without the lonely#i dont even know what to make With the lonely but its all thats here#<- this part is only barely related but theres a connection there ykwim#talkys#ive never felt anything good or bad in either direction...not much to draw from ...#i know i dont NEED my ocs to have roles in a novel but it just gets embarrassing at some point#ppl take interest in talon and i cant put together anything interesting there's nothing in my brain#i cant connect threads i cant think outside of the box#alas! alas#i think its just always going to be one of those immutable things 😞 too late to rewire rhe brain#especially since the monotony and captivity is ongoing.#goodnite ^_^
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What am I gonna do when croissant finishes the game their journey... TT_TT I don't wanna say goodbye to them!!
I don't know buddy I've been wondering the same thing :') Let's not think about it-
#Real talk despite knowing very little about the ending I DO have a small handful of comics I'd like to make about post-game depending on-#-how things go#I also have a slew of breadweave comics that weren't in-game events I'd like to make too#Regardless I don't think I'll just drop Croissant like a hot potato once we're finished with the game!#I love them and still really enjoy the BG3 community#but I think I will take a little break from comics for a short period#It's been....a lot of work. And a lot of the /same/ work - for months. haha#.......I am however considering making a short (non-bg3) graphic novel with a writer friend bc as it turns out making comics IS fun#We'll see!#Ok I'm done sorry for rambling ngjfkdlnsjkh#asks#Wait I'm not done one more thing: not wanting to say goodbye to Croissant is also why I STILL haven't finished the game T____T#I'm getting really close and I am SCARED
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Ouagh I need something new to get super into or I'm gonna explode
#those between hyperfixation jitters#been reading the orv webtoon and really enjoying it#but also i know i do not have the dedication to read a million word web novel#no matter how good it is#if it's more than like 20k words then reading it online will just result in me gettjng a headache#i am a physical books enjoyer#but yeah i need a new thing to get immersed in STAT#flippin flops
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Shifters - Part 3
In which they discover the dose limits on the experimental potions and some tension comes out as a result.
Part 1 Part 2
Some relevant reading as referenced in the argument:
"When you returned to the Ragnarok for one..."
"...or after you returned from your trip to the moon?"
"You asked the same of me once..."
"You really do have the most beautiful eyes, you know..."
(Part 4)
#ffxiv#gposers#ktisis pose#reshade#RalmaPresets#visual novel#wolnpc#wolgraha#R'alma/G'raha#R'alha#more fantasia shenanigans#this one got out of hand for sure lmao#it really should have been prose but here we are#i actually learned a lot about posing expressions by doing it this way so in the end i'm glad that i did#this is also where my wolship almost broke up actually#i was writing the script#and after R'alma got angry and started yelling#i realized that things were going to go VERY badly VERY quickly if they didn't calm down#so I stopped writing dialogue and had G'raha take a breath#oh boy am i glad that i did lmao#anyway. this is part 3 of 5 for this series#and then I still have several other VN series that jump off of this one#told you guys I have a lot of backlog to share here#I hope you guys are enjoying it
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Gambling Apocalypse Tenma AU
As I rewatch Kaiji I inevitably end up wanting to combine show I like with other show I like and stuffing fav characters into show. So here we are.
This was uh going to be a short summary type thing but I accidentally wrote a novella about it sorry
This AU starts off with a much more depressive Tenma. After Tobio's death, rather than immediately pour his grief into developing a robot version of his son, he recedes into himself, psychologically paralyzed, likely turning to alcohol to drown out his anguish.
His mental state is taken as an opportunity within the Ministry of Science to have him ejected from his position; Tenma was never the most well-liked director, and there were those with ambition to usurp him that would jump at the chance. Not that he especially cares in his state.
He's eventually dragged out of his stagnation by Ochanomizu - who, inadvertently, becomes the very catalyst pushing Tenma to develop a robot replacement to his child. This was not what he meant by encouraging Tenma to fill the void left by his son.
...But, well, he is no longer the director of the Ministry of Science. His access to limitless government funds and resources for "scientific research" has been cut off, and this is a project he cannot finance on his own. He can't ask Ochanomizu for help, but...interestingly...a representative of a certain shady organization known as the Teiai Corporation reaches out to him, offering to finance and support his project. A sane and well-minded Tenma might think better of it, but grieving and desperate, Tenma accepts their offer and is able to create a robot in the image of his beloved Tobio. For a while, there's joy in his life.
But the bill, as ever, comes due: Tenma must pay up, and the very resources that had been at his disposal will certainly ensure that he will, or else. Of course, he doesn't have the money; instead, he is given a choice. He can relinquish the robot Tobio in order to wipe out his debt - the child is a sophisticated and powerful robot, after all - or he can participate in a certain illicit event hosted by the Teiai Corporation.
It's nothing major...just a four-hour gambling cruise with a collection of desperate, damned souls that were also swept into debt with Teiai. The conditions are simple: Those who choose to participate are given a chance to clear their debts wholesale should they win. And should they lose...?
Well...no one really knows what happens to the losers seized by Teiai. It's said that they labour away their debts under Teiai's watchful eye and are freed once their work has covered their debts, though it's rumoured that most perish before they reclaim freedom.
There's only one answer Tenma can give, of course; he's not willing to lose Tobio again.
Thus is Tenma's debut into the Gambling Apocalypse, where he must become cutthroat in order to survive; if he wants to see his son again, he must make choices that will doom the hapless to miserable servitude, with a nonzero chance it ends in their death.
He survives the cruise, but of course, it was hardly enough to clear his debt; the cruise was never going to be the end of it. Teiai doesn't let go of its victims that easily. He will be called on again: this is a weight that hangs over him, all while he returns to his son Tobio. The same hands that have pushed innocents into hell must now be the hands that can embrace his child.
He wants to protect Tobio from the truth and enjoy what peaceful moments he's allowed with his son, but it's difficult. It's difficult to be the parent of a child who cannot understand the danger that looms ahead; this "happy" home is not to last. Tenma angers quickly and easily. He turns that anger onto Tobio.
As Teiai's games become more and more vicious and unrelenting, as his conscience holds onto the last vestiges of thread that remain, Tenma even threatens, once, to give the boy in: it would all end, then; the debt would be clear and no longer would he have to endure Tobio's childish annoyances, his ungratefulness.
The next time that Tenma is beckoned, Tobio takes matters into his own hands. He does understand, now; and he would have, if only Tenma had bothered to explain sooner. If it's a debt that needs clearing, he will work. He will help his father clear his debts however he can. Of course, it's difficult to find work as a child; but a circus troupe finds amusement in the idea of a child robot, and takes him in. He is whisked into a certainly unpleasant working situation, but he remembers his father, and what he must be enduring. Tobio, also, will endure.
When Tenma returns, Tobio is gone.
All that held Tenma back from becoming something monstrous has disappeared. All that kept him going has disappeared. When he is called upon by Teiai, there is no knowing what sort of person might come out the other end; whether a monster clawing his way to freedom regardless of what actions he must take, or a desolate husk surrendering defeat.
There is still a light, however dim: Found by Professor Ochanomizu and rescued from the circus, Tobio - now Atom - is able to shed light on the situation which Tenma took great pains to keep hidden from his old friend. With time running out, Ochanomizu and Atom must do what they can to save Tenma - from Teiai, and from himself.
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UHHH and that's a wrap!!!! I couldn't quite decide which way Tenma would go after hitting Rock Bottom in this AU, and tbh it would really depend on the kind of mental state he's in at the time. On the one hand I like the narrative of Ochanomizu and Tobio racing to prevent Tenma from crossing a line (actual outright murder probably) - or having to pull him back into humanity (and yknow, his ensuing penance)
But on the other hand having him get sent to Teiai Evil Hell Prison would be interesting because a) there's a lot of narrative potential having Tenma faced with what Teiai is doing with the people that lose the games and b) need him to decimate the foreman at chinchirorin Kaiji style
Tenma's whole character is definitely a much different guy in this AU, he starts off pretty sympathetic, the guy you wanna root for, he just ends up having an inverse character arc where he gets worse instead of better. His conflict with "Tobio" is also kind of reversed, less about being unsatisfied with Tobio as a son and more not being able to handle the fact that he probably has intense PTSD now and isnt capable of coping with it in a way conducive to being a parent (or like, coping at all)
Anyway that's gambling apocalypse tenma!!!
#umataro tenma#long post#well that became a novel. sorry lmao#in my mind teiai's evil hell prison in astro boy verse would probably be quite a bit different than regular kaiji#like. fuckin. weapons manufacturing for teiai or something like that. or scary bad danger robots. horrifying concept#Tenma would be a valuable asset to them whether by giving up Atom or by losing in death game hell and being forced to work for em#and if he dies? they can just take atom#get him out of there.#I'm also thinkin of who Teiai would be represented by.....the snakey loan sharks u could easily put skunk in there.#but who is an evil fucked up sadist billionaire. theres probably someone who could be fucked up enough I just dont know offhand#and im allergic to mischaracterizing in AUs lol im not gonna make a slightly bad guy into an evil freakguy. so. Hyoudou is just himself.#if you squint this could be considered an 80s astro boy AU..has a cruise arc & not actually giving atom away#but man. that tenma LEAST of all deserves this fate lmao#do I want to write fic of this? yes. will I? not likely!#I can just smell it dude this would be some crazy fuckoff 100k shit I am not ready brother#also it would just be soooooo so so so so so edgy. I dont really enjoy writing intensely grim stuff w/ little to no respite#also tbh. I am too stupid. LOL. I cannot write clever gambles alas
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Fun fact about me I still have not seen Rise of Skywalker because I heard how bad it was and I loved The Last Jedi so much that I just can’t be assed to ruin that experience for myself.
#listen I don’t always agree with Jenny Nicholson but we have the exact same opinions on TLJ#except I like Poe and really enjoyed DJ#no I am not a Reylo#I’ve been listening to a lot of old Jenny vids at work and it made me want to watch TLJ again#AND SO I DID#and I still love it#but I have weird Star Wars opinions#like thanks to the novel Revenge of the Sith was my favorite Star Wars movie because the novel is so fucking good#that it makes the movie better
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my teeth of god novel is finally here omg
cannot wait to curl up with it in the new year!
#ramble on exie#it was supposed to be here on christmas eve but i wasn’t home to receive it lmao#and now i’m headed out of town for the next week and don’t want to bring it with#but i am very excited to read it! seems really neat#cost is fuckin wack (had to pay extra import fees when it arrived 😭) but i am still pumped!#it’ll look so nice on my shelves with my other graphic novels#<- not that i have many… it’s a format i’m still learning to enjoy#i’m a picky reader- i like lots and lots of words and being able to visualize on my own#graphic novels are hit or miss because it never feels like enough words
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i like this detail whenever it comes up where someone who has JUST met chung myung rattles off very factually correct praise and exposits observations about chung myungs character that we, as the readers, are already aware of or are made to be aware of in that moment, but the disciples, who are so desensitized to chung myung and his behaviour atp, that even when faced w these spot on observations, they find it strange/untrue/a mischaracterization or a misunderstanding from the other party because even after all the time spent w chung myung, ESPECIALLY after spending so much time w chung myung, they see his actions and behaviour as default surface level eccentricism and havent really bothered to look much deeper into why he does or says the things he does, only knowing that he's never acted any differently than the way he did when they first met him and that he couldnt possibly have any ulterior motives or thoughts that they wouldnt know about because they think that the chung myung they can see, his rash callousness and poor decision making skills and bizarre off beat mannerisms and susceptibility to praise, is all the chung myung there is
#i know their grasp of cm and his personality/motives/etc etc broadens as the story goes on but rn i think this particular dynamic they have#with him currently is interesting to me.. their off-handedness when it comes to characters digging deep into cms psyche isnt malicious#but rather ignorance.. resurrection stories r usually a bit hit or miss to me cuz sometimes i feel like they dont always hit the mark#but rotmhs REALLY captures the skewed perspectives and misunderstandings that i really enjoy reading about from reincarnation novels#return of the blossoming blade#return of the mount hua sect#random ass thought piece what da hell.....hope any of this makes sense its like five am gewd night
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the geno goal just for you!!!
ahahahaha yeah a sad frail sick girl...some good luck charm i would be 😅
#sad for me geno does not know i exist#I don't think he ever got any of the fanart i sent :(#i confess a few weeks ago i even mailed a drawing with a request to meet him in LA#because apparently if i am ill and feeling like im probably gonna die i no longer have embarrassment#anyway no response :((((#novel concept: I really should try drawing people who enjoy being drawn sometime 😅#also before anyone asks or complains no i did not send any of my more inappropriate fanart I kept it very respectful
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i can't believe i'm saying this but some literary scholars have such wildly wrong headcanons about my thesis blorbos
#it's horrible /j#buba rambles#this for sure is a sentence#i'm looking at you Shaddock. stop assigning sexualities you're doing it wrong#am i possibly blorboifying the characters i'm working with to trick my brain? perhaps#but also not really#i do enjoy the novels#it's just all a little too much right now
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