#i put far too much work into these fake tweets for no real reason

[fogwitchoftheevermore]

@mcyt-aro-week days 1 and 2 because i missed yesterday.

prompts: unconventional relationships / trope subversion, loveless / AU (blaseball au)

(remaining post under the cut)

"God, at this rate I'm never saving anyone's life ever again," Gem sighs as she puts her phone on Do Not Disturb.

"What do you mean?" False asks.

They're at a coffee shop in Houston. The Sunbeams had just finished a series with the Spies and were going home that night, while the Mechanics started a series with them tomorrow. False had decided to arrive a day early so her and Gem could do this, and after the terrible games both of their teams had had, False was particularly thankful for it.

Generally, she was thankful for Gem. About two weeks prior, False had been pitching a game in the Hellmouth, and the umpire had gone rogue. It was the ump at home plate, and it had been making a beeline for her when Gem had come sprinting out of her dugout and pushed False out of the way with more force than she'd expected the woman to hold. Gem had then tackled the umpire to the ground, taking the flames herself until they burnt out and could be safely removed from the field. Gem had barely seemed phased after the fact, just shook the dust off her uniform and walked back to the dugout. It was about as terrifying as it was impressive, and when Gem hit the game winning run off her at her next at bat, False couldn't find it in herself to be anything but impressed.

"My twitter mentions are blowing up, I think some fan or paparazzi saw us here and assumed we were on a date." Gem rolls her eyes and takes a long sip of her tea.

False can't help the snicker that comes out at Gem's words, but Gem doesn't seem particularly amused. "Wait, seriously?"

"Yup, this happens to me all the time," Gem says. "Everyone's got this image of us Fire Eaters being like, knights in shining armor, so every time I save somebody's life I have to deal with the internet being literally unusable for a few weeks if I want to avoid speculation about my relationships. Oh, and that's all the press will want to talk to me about after my games."

"Oh," False says, taking a long sip of her tea. She doesn't make much of a habit of looking at social media, and she has suddenly never been more grateful. "And this happens every time?"

"Every time! It's like they're trying to dissuade us from actually doing it or something. I'm not gonna stop, but like, sometimes I really want to. Can't they just ask me about the actual game one of these days?"

False lets the table fall quiet for a moment. She's thinking. For her entire career, she'd been a notoriously private person, both in her personal life and to the public. She'd been working on the personal life part for a long time, at the behest of her therapist, and she likes to think she's made some improvements. As for the public sphere, well, they weren't entitled to know anything about her. But- False takes a look at Gem, who's eyes are quickly flitting around the shop, like she's keeping an eye out for any cameras or fans looking too long in their direction. Maybe just this one thing...

"I think I might have an idea."

[sparrowhero]

Assorted Hawks Boyfriend Headcanons

He wants to be a good boyfriend, for real.  He tries his best, but the HPSC is a real pain in his ass and his own workaholic nature can get in the way with the man who’s far too fast for his own good.  Sometimes he puts a little bit too much on his plate, and takes way too much on himself, so it’s ironic that patience is the most necessary virtue.

Doesn’t date around very much.  The HPSC is VERY strict about his image as ‘everyone’s Hawks’ and they bitch him out about you a lot as things get more serious.  If you’re a pro, even moreso, but if you’re some no-name civilian, they’re a bit more lenient.  He’s good about letting it fall off his back for the most part.

He’ll be late for dates, but never on purpose– unless it’s to surprise you with something!  He thinks your glee is just as funny as you being shocked, so watch out.  He also thinks it’s cute when you’re (just a little) mad.

Likes to kiss your nose when you’re mad.  If you’re shorter than him, he bows his head and looks at you so sweetly, brows furrowed together in faux innocence and asks forgiveness  If you’re taller than him, he flashes a big smile up at you and likes to take your face in his hands and squish your cheeks together while he pleads his case that you were just too cute not to tease a little bit.

READMORE FOR LENGTH

He’s not insecure about his height.  If anything, he’s very much this tweet:

(text description: a twitter tweet from Arson Welles @ PissJugTycoon that says "I dated a 5'8 guy who'd taunt every jacked, 6'3 bro he met until they'd pull up their fist to beat him up, whereupon my ex would go "heyheyheyyy c'maahn I'm a little guy, I'm just a little guyy, noo, it's also my birthday, I'm a little birthday boyy" & it somehow always worked)

Doesn’t mind if you don’t like heights, can’t fly, or have other reasons you cannot join him in the air either by his side or in his arms.  While he prefers to fly around, he’s also fine to walk around “the normal way” or meet up in a secluded place to spend time together.

He’s got expensive taste for himself and dresses himself well (especially because a lot of what he wears has to be tailored with his wings.)  But he’d be over the moon with delight for anything homemade, no matter the skill set.  He’s just as much the type to wear it immediately or keep it at home just to stare and smile wistfully at when he’s missing you.  Kind of a hoarder of sentimental things.

Flops on you like a rag doll whenever possible, completely bonelessly.  He likes to cuddle close in between your neck and shoulders.  His wings flap a little bit when he’s happy and content.

He can only really sleep on his stomach comfortably if he’s not sleeping sitting up, so if you’re taking a nap together, good luck getting out from under his wings.  He spreads those things fully when he’s relaxing and they’re heavier than they look.  He likes it when you use him as a lap pillow too.

Will absolutely not tell you his real name for an absurdly long time.  Trust doesn’t come easy to him for things like that, and he justifies it as being for both of your safety.  Enjoys you making guesses as to what his name COULD be and if you guys are going out somewhere incognito (or as incognito as you can be given he’s a celebrity), he likes to use the various fake names you’ve guessed.

Whenever you get close, his eyes crinkle juuuust a little bit in a bittersweet mix of emotions.  He’ll tell you…eventually.

[wibble-wobbegong]

hi Wibble! i just wanna say petergate might be one of my favorite gates ever so far, and i love your analysis so much! if you don't mind me asking, there are a few things I'm unclear about:

who were the other henrys mentioned previously?

you mentioned that since November 1983, there hasn't been a body like Chrissy's, but wouldn't it be since 1979, or even the 1950s (i forget the exact year) especially if Owens was thinking about the Creels rather than the lab massacre when he saw Chrissy's body? because I don't think Will's fake body looked like Chrissy's. also, you mentioned how Chrissy's murder doesn't eliminate the possibility of a regular person murdering her. but imo, I don't think anybody who didn't have powers could have murdered someone like that, even the military general(?i dont know his title) didn't seem to think so, which is why he sought out owens in the first place.

another silly thing i wanted to point out is about the strangerwriters tweet: i find it interesting that they specifically mentioned calling dmitri "enzo" is fine but calling henry "peter" is weird. imo, it doesn't line up with the theory that henry was called "peter" in the lab. because then it would be fine to call henry 'peter', just like it would be fine to call dmitri 'enzo'. of course, if peter was supposed to be a different person entirely then it would be weird to call henry 'peter'.

I'm fully aware that this is a Colossal reach and I'm probably reading too much into a social media post but i can't stop thinking about it lmao.

i hope this was coherent enough and I didn't misinterpret anything in your analysis!! thank you for answering (if you do answer)

the other henrys were one of the guys at benny’s (1x02, 31:42) and the guy hopper arrested during the S3 protests (3x02, 37:42)!

if i said any date other than 1979 it was probably an error on my end!! i did mean to say that there haven’t been bodies like that since the labs kids even though i think owens was pulling memories from virginia’s death. i don’t backread most of my posts even though i definitely should, so sometimes small stuff like that gets messed up lol

I only say it’s possible for a non-powered person to have done that due to the lack of anything firmly supernatural other than that it would be incredibly difficult for a normal person to do. people can do wild things to other people, stuff that doesn’t seem possible until it happens. i also bring that up just because i do think owens carries a natural level of skepticism about most things, so the lack of anything certifiably supernatural wouldn’t lead to “there’s a war coming to hawkins” in the typical owens mindset. although what the general points out between the people el killed and chrissy are similar (the bloodied eyes) they’re also very clearly different, as el made them bleed from the inside out whereas chrissy’s eyes were pulled into her head (not that owens is given that information). for a somewhat skeptical person like owens who has worked with someone like brenner who can do unimaginable things to people, i’d say he wouldn’t be immediately inclined to believe it’s supernatural without gathering actual evidence. unlike brenner, owens actually follows scientific procedures for the sake of science.

also, HUGE agree on the strangerwriters tweet!! they make a point of drawing a line between peter and henry and the reason i put emphasis on dmitri and enzo being included is to show that the duffers aren’t lying to us like they often do. your reasoning is spot on too and only drives the point home even harder!!! kissing ur gorgeous brain anon

i’m glad you like the peter stuff!! absolutely honored to have made it into your favorites, because it’s become one of mine too. peter is like a son to me atp and he’s not even real lmao

thank you for the ask!! i hope i cleared everything up :)

[technowoah]

Forever Was a Long Time Ago

Where you and Clay find yourselves caught up in someone elses lies.

- ANON REQUESTED!

- FEM READER!

Prompts!

4) "I never fucking wanted this/that!"

16) "Stop bringing it up"

⚠︎ toxic relationship, swearing, mentions of sex (?), and horrible writing. I didn't proofread either

It was hard to not talk to him, but that was your decision at the moment. You didnt even tell him what was the matter, and you refused to until you found out your real feelings about where you lie. Right now you were mad, fuming, of course you were refusing to talk to him because he dosen't talk to you.

The reason why the distance between you and Clay grew further and further apart was that a stupid tweet from this girl. He knew what he wae doing too, it was like him to do this behind the scenes. It was a tweet that showed him at a dinner table with another person other than you across the table from him. At least they had the decency to exclude his face from the frame, but the hands, and clothes were something you were all used to. The tweet continued on and on, and you believed every word.

He knew what he was doing. He did this often, because jealousy was a big thing in your relationship. You can admit it isnt all just him too, it was a possesive relationship. It wasn't healthy at all and you knew it. Your friends and family knew too, but you two always found yourself in his arms.

Clay liked to toy with you, but this was taking it too far. You ended up messaging the creator of the tweet and they said that everything was true and they went into extreme detail too. They even brought up screenshots of messages that you would deem fake. If it wasn't for your rage right, you would've debunked that right away.

Wallowing in your anger was a common thing for both of you in the relationship. The first time this happend was at a small party Clay invited you to. He ended up flirting and paying all of his attention to another person just to get you jealous. It started off innocent to make something more out of nothing, but became worse with time. You started to do the same to him and vice versa, it became a habit more than a thing to make eachother horny for a night.

The jealousy thing became more of a guilty pleasure, and the guilty pleasure became cheating. For you two it was okay because you two were going back to eachother, it was okay until now. Now a person was rubbing it in your face, usually it was a quick night without eachother, ignoring one another for a week and then getting back together until the cycle completes again.

It was emotionally tiring but you couldn't break out of it, maybe this was a sign to stop.

Today marks a week and a half with no contact with Clay. You had locked yourself up in your home today, you couldn't bother to do anything productive today. It was just one of those days, and it was a day where you wondered if Clay would text or call you. You shamelessly watched his livestreams, you missed his voice, his touch, his whole being. You wondered if his friends were saying the same stuff about you your friends were saying about him.

You were a puppet. You fell everytime his hands weren't pulling the strings and right now you wouldn't be under his control. You refused this time.

Speaking of the devil, your phone chimed signaling that you have received a message. You had opened it and it was one of many extremely vauge texts from Clay.

( Clay )

Im coming over now

[read]

Not bothering to text back, you continued to pay attention to something else. You were ready to confrony him and put an end to this.

It was a few minuted before you heard the lock on your door being unlocked and a voice calling for you.

"You home?!"

"In the living room!"

He reached the living room and sat in a smaller chair to your right. You two sat in silence until you worked up to courage to speak.

"Why are you here?" You asked him breaking the silence.

"Why did you let me in here?" Clay retorted.

"I mean, it's not like you just invited yourself in. You had to have something to say."

"Not necessarily, can I just visit my girl?" Clay leaned back into his seat.

"Yeah you can, but I wouldn't consider myself your girlfriend." You sat up and croseed your arms. Your phone was to your side waiting to show him the evidence.

"Really? What is this, the 5th time you've said that?" Clay rolled his eyes in response.

"You've done the same thing more time than I could count. You have no right to talk."

"I have absolutely every right." Clay smirked. He knew he was getting under your skin.

"So, Why did you go out with that girl?" You asked bluntly.

"Why wouldn't I? I mean it isnt a big deal we're here now."

"To me it is a big deal!"

"It never fucking was before when you were seeing another guy!" Clay yelled sitting up.

"I never fucking wanted this?! I never wanted to see you with a different guy, but here we are!"

"I didn't fucking start this whole cheating rabbit hole thing!" You flared your arms.

"What I saw was that you were talking with that girl for a while! It was months."

"What?!"

You had brought out your phone and pulled up the messages and extended your arm to give him your phone to read. He had taken the phone out of your hand with a confused face on his face. You waited while he scrolled through text messages while an emotion you couldn't read was on his face.

"Would you be mad if I said it was all true?" Clay had this look of caution on his face.

"YES! I fucking would!" You exclaimed in disbelief.

"I still dont know why?"

You stood up wanting to let off some steam. "This is what we do! Dont you see?! We keep going in circles. I go out with a man, and you get mad. You go out with a girl and I get mad, we come back together, but a whole month?!"

"Does it matter?!" Clay stood up too.

"Yes!"

"Remember when-"

"No! We're talking about YOU right now and how this little fling started a month ago. If you loved her that much stay!"

"Remember when you spent two nights over that boys house and-"

"Stop bringing it up!" You interrupted him.

"Then you stop trying to act like you're a saint!"

Pausing for a moment you wanted to get out of this situation. Clearly this argument wasn't getting anywhere or heading to the right place, your body temperature was hot, you needed to clear your head.

You tried walking away, but Clay held you there. "I dont "love" her I never-!"

"You stayed consistent with her more than me!"

"Stop acting like you're such a angel! Acting like you haven't dont the same too!"

"Not for that long! Get that through your head!" You tried walking away again, but he had a grip on you wrist.

You glared at him, staring right into his eyes, his grip getting slightly tighter wanting to make you stay.

"Let me go."

He froze at that and stood still. After sll this time of you two being together, you have never said those words. They had multiple meanings at this moments. One being "let me go physically" and the other being "let me go so I can move on." You had meant both.

"You mean it?"

"What do you think I mean?" You asked, his grip on your wrist stayed there as you awaited his answer.

He paused for a moment and then he started to speak. "You want to leave this relationship. That's what I believe."

"Well. You are right. Clay I'm tired. You know that!"

His grip on your wrist loosened. He was giving you an opening to leave and you took it. You took that opening and when your hand left his you two were done with eachother. The confrontation was quick, it usually was like this, today you just wanted it to be over. You grabbed your keys and a coat from the coat rack needing some fresh air

"You need to leave my house by the time I get back. Okay?" You turned around to see Clay in the same spot you left him in. He nodded and you slipped on your shoes and left the house for the night.

The windows of your car were rolled down as you rode through the streets not having a destination in mind. It was clear to you, a weight lifted from your shoulders and a new opening was near, but you couldn't see it yet.

You could breathe now, nothing else mattered. You had stopped at a red light and you phone continued to light up. There was not that many drivers on the road at this hour, so you opened the phone to a string of messages.

( Clay )

She lied

I was trying to tell you, but you lashed out, but I understand

I'll focus on you I promise. I wont break promises anymore.

Come back

[read]

You sighed looking at the messages and a wave of guilt washed over you. You had found a place to turn your car around and drive back to your house where he was waiting for you against your wishes.

The circle was completed once more.

[a-jynx]

:0 uh more Dream smp stuff?? cause y’all liked the other one??? (Georgenotfound edition & kinda long)

being Dream’s sister was rough already so imagine how tough life gets when you start dating one of his besties???

you met george through dream - obviously - and well.. putting it kindly, you hated each other. I mean, HATED each other! It always became a rivalry between you two, shooting down one another’s video ideas and never compromising until Sap or Dream stepped in.

“why do you hate him?” dream groaned as he watched you dislike ANOTHER Georgenotfound video. you glanced up at your freakishly tall brother before scoffing

“because he’s a spoilt brat and.. and he shouldn’t expect everyone to grovel like you do.” you scoffed, as Dream groaned, scrubbing his hands over his face.

“y/n,”

“nope, nuh-uh you green tellatubby i’m not befriending him.”

“you’ve been hanging out with techno and tommy on discord too much.. Anyway, just.. please TRY and get along with him? at least pretend for a little bit - the fans get all protective and will baby him before they defend you..” dream’s voice trailed as he sat next to you, making you huff.

“ofc they’d baby him.. and it’ll be fine - I’ll be fine, Clay! I’m a big kid, some trolls on the internet won’t upset me.” you grinned, wrapping an arm around your little brother’s shoulders. he rolled his eyes before poking his index into your ribs, causing you to yelp.

“okay, but i warned you and i’ll try and help if stuff gets too much, okay? remember you’re my sister.. i still worry about you.”

“okay, don’t get sappy you waking tree! we have a stream to start,”

which lead to now.. A Geoguesser and Jack Box stream with the Dream Team ft. y/nwasnttaken - it started out awesome! The chat was having a blast having their boys stream, the guys were happy to be streaming, and you were having a great time.. until George came after you for guessing the wrong country..

“seriously, y/n?? you were, like, a million miles away!” george snorted as sap and dream joined in the laughter, you sighed before faking a short laugh.

“please, you usually suck at this game and it was one bad guess while you’ve been guessing wrong foe the past five minutes.” you couldn’t hold back the slight venom in your voice as the discord grew an awkward silence as chat began to grumble about the sudden change in atmosphere.

“chill, y/n/n, i don’t think George had an real issue, right Gogy?” sap nervously chuckled, he knew just as well as dream that for some reason you and george were always at one another’s throat.

“yeah, i had to ill intent, it’s called playful banter, y/n lighten up, honey,”

“is this just go after y/n day or what? i don’t mean to be an asshole but you’ve been after me the entire stream! and maybe the fans and you guys don’t care, but it’s hard to act like im not affected by you constantly bashing me and then laughing when dream or sap - or even yourself - get it wrong!” you grew quiet once your piece was out in the air, your heart was pounding against your ribs and you felt like you were going to be sick. “i..”

“y/n/n,”

“no! no, it’s… im just going to go, you guys have a good stream.” you quickly exited the discord call, closing out of all your tabs and leaving yourself to stare at your shrunk form.. oh shit..

you grabbed your phone and opened Twitter, a mistake honestly, it was already trending.. clips, screenshots, and the #nightmareofasibling in the US. you gawked at the screen - tapping the hashtag, you should’ve listened to Dream..

‘i knew they were lousy but my god it’s a game..’

‘they always act like they’re better when they aren’t, poor gogy 💔😔’

‘i feel bad for dream and sapnap - they have to live with that 😳’

‘@y/nwasnttaken you disgust me and i can’t believe they even tolerate you. rot’

each @, each tweet was one wishing for your demise or saying that the dream team deserves better. maybe they’re right but you had a right to stand up for yourself! sure.. it was a over a geoguesser game but dealing with that for an hour in a half, anyone would be tired of it.

tears were already starting to drip as you hastily wiped at your cheeks, attempting to keep the water works at bay. it got harder when a ping went off from your phone, indicting another tweet was made at you. even with your blurred vision you frowned as @GeorgeNotFound popped up.

‘Regarding the stream, I do not hate y/n. Nor do I want hate sent to them. I will not tolerate any of my fans hating on one of my friends, it was partly my fault for antagonize them.

I care for them deeply and I hope they know how sorry I actually feel and the guilt rushing through me while I write this. I hope you can forgive me, sweets.. @y/nwasnttaken’

you hiccuped a laugh, a small smile breaking across your lips. you liked the tweet before heading to discord to find your messages had been blown up - Niki, Wilbur, and George had sent you multiple messages asking how you were. Selecting George’s messages, you grinned..

‘y/n?? hey come back to the stream’

‘i was kidding, come on, this is how we work..’

‘okay, i’m starting to get freaked out cause you’re not answering and twitter is spamming- shit i need to fix’

the messages had stopped for a few minute before a small video was sent, showing george in his recording room.

“y/n i’m honestly really sorry, it was dumb of me to keep poking at you when you looked and sounded like you didn’t like it - it’s just.. that’s how we’ve always been! i just.. please message me when you can? i know dream’s already pissed at me, and sap won’t stop threatening me to fix this now - even though they laughed too - BESIDES the point… just message me soon?” he sheepishly sent the camera a small smile, his cheeks and nose a slight red. you couldn’t help but roll your eyes before quickly typing him.

‘y’know i have half a mind to be pissed at you, but.. i’m sorry too. i should’ve have blown up at you or the others, especially on stream.. can - can we hop on call and sort this out?’

Gogster is typing… Popped up instantly, making a smile flash across your face. Suddenly a call chimed in, making you jump slightly before clearing your throat and answering the video call.

“Y/N!! Oh my god, you answered- ah, i’m so sorry I just, teasing each other and acting like we hate each other was always our act and I know i pushed it too far on stream,” George continued to ramble as you shook your head.

“George, Gogy you’re rambling..” you mumbled as he looked back at the camera, clearing his throat with a sheep smile on his face.

“uh, sorry.. look, can we just.. try again?” he muttered as you broke into a dazzling smile.

“we can, but I still get to call you Gogster..”

George broke into a loud laugh, you joining in with his contagious giggle. He nodded, clearing his throat again as he sighed gently.

“That’s all i ask, y/n.. but can i tell you something? dream and sap have been nagging me for the last couple of months to mention this..” His voice trailed as you nodded, rolling your shoulders and sinking further into your chair.

“i may not get along with you, British brat.. but you can always talk to me,” you smirk as George coughs out a laugh, shaking his head as you broke into a grin.

“you’re jealous that I have a hot accent, but seriously.. i.. Y/N I’ve liked you for a while and I’d like for us to try,” his voice trailed out as you blinked, staring at the dark brunette before giggling.

“i.. i actually have a trip coming up, to come see Niki and Wilbur.. I wouldn’t mind adding another person.” You trailed, sheepishly glancing at George as a large smile broke across his face, making you giggle as he quickly nods and laughs.

“Wait, really?! But- But we always- We.. Oh my gosh!” safe to say.. George was at a lost for words and you couldn’t help but be excited for these next two weeks to fly by..

and ofc dream and drista and sap made bets - dream bet you guys would date because of drama, drista just bet that you’d go on a date but would want to kill each other, and sapnap bet you guys would want to instantly date - some were more right than others, but in the end,.. Y/nistaken & Georgewasfound became trending and knocked the harmful trends down

[life-rewritten]

Lovely Writer Ep 1; An Introduction to Ambition, Masks and Secret Goals

We did it, guys! After trying hard to get back into this writing groove thing, I think I have found it, the show that will make me want to write. And we all say What??  Oh, my word was the first episode of Lovely writer so great. From the first moment the show starts, you can tell there's meta, it's calling out the BL industry; sarcastically, with comedy, shallowness, and yet there's this air of secrecy and depth to it. It's funny because the industry's problems made fun of are essentially going to be our big villain of the show, the thing that's going to try and rip our couple apart. So to see the first episode already lay a foundation for us to start realising the disconnect with what's being done on the surface vs what's being truly displayed secretly shows us already this show is playing with the ideas of masks and the lengths it would take to actually survive in this world/industry portrayed in the show. The thing as well is we are watching this show through the lens of Gene; he's also someone who's become very disconnected with how he feels about the problematic elements of this industry vs how people want him to think about it; they want him to thrive off it, to use it for his ambition, to use it to make himself known. So already, we are also introduced to the theme of ambition and the theme of secrets. The characters are acting in a way to get something done for them, and yet they're hiding their truths to please something; the industry, a person of power, or just something they want. And that's fascinating already to start with. That's already going to be fun to unpack and write about.

I just really love how deep this show is already becoming;  hidden with comedy and romance, we see depth, we see realism and calling out issues that we face in the real world concerning the BL genre, and still, we see yet, a love story brewing as well, it's a perfect combination. Or is it? And not to be so fully surprised, I did say that Tee is a great director, he made TharnType mean something to me, and that's because he hides his themes and his actual message behind layers and layers of subtext, he focuses on flaws of characters, but he makes them feel real, yet he also tackles real conversations about things that happen in real life and hides it behind a passionate romance and comedy. That's why this is so great for me. In already episode 1, Tee has shown up and done everything I knew he could do with Lovely Writer, and I am so freaking excited. The words are pouring out of me. Once the show started, I wanted to write, analyse and talk about this show.  I wanted to bring to the surface the meta, the subtext, the foreshadowings and the character depth. I am truly ready for this show, and I hope you all are too. So episode 1, how were we introduced to the themes of the show so far; well, let's find out.

An Introduction to Ambition, Masks and Secrets

So the show starts off as a typical romantic comedy Bl; at first, you are like, it's funny they keep mentioning these little truths about the genre and the industry. It makes sense; we're seeing the story through the eye of a frustrated writer in the industry who has to do a lot to be part of it, so it is funny but also surreal to see the issues being brought up about the industry. Because of this, you know this show is meta. It's taking its self not seriously, but it's actually serious below the surface. So immediately, my sensors start to ping, could there be more depth to this story, are there hints showing us what to look out for, is there more to what Tee wants to say with this show. And actually, the first thing is the introduction to Aey. They mention him at first during the casting call discussion; the way they introduce him is interesting to me because I know he's an obstacle to our story. He's a love rival, and he's sneaky.

Aey is an interesting villain if you wanna call him that. He's obviously going to be a barrier, and you know, his smile on his face seems like a mask, not particularly for evil, just something he has to use to get his way. Just like Nubsib, he's faking an image, and we see his real face in the bathroom, this episode. Especially when he looks through some comments and tweets, which I don't know what it's about because there were no subs, but I'm guessing either mentioned his sexuality or how cute how he and Nubsib will be together or something else that pokes at his insecurity. Right now, he's ambitious,  his thoughts are on succeeding, and so he acts docile, nice and friendly to get what he wants; however, we can see that the reason why he's right now trying to get Nubsib's attention isn't because of love; it's because of the job, of wanting to keep appearances, of knowing this would make him more successful, this will make them famous and please their growing shipping fandom.

That's the exciting thing; the question is, does he really like Nubsib or is he just faking it. Is there more to his connection with Nubsib? Also, just the fact that he's not a one-note character but he already seems to have layers is so exciting for me; this show is already doing what I hope it would do for me, it's being meta, secretive, smart, structured and still having comedy and romance on the surface. These characters all seem to have layers, truths hidden and interesting reasons for why they do what they do. That's fascinating to me. So because of that one scene where we see Aey almost break his mask and then go back to putting it on to please people and write on his social media, I'm already seeing the theme of ambition in this series. I see it in Gene, Nubsib (for Gene mostly), Aey, even Hin, who's a bit interesting with his own want to write and need to be noticed. Interesting.

The lengths our characters have to go through to achieve their ambitions might make them take on masks that they aren't particularly comfortable with, and also isn't an accurate display of their own values and truths but never the less they have to do this to achieve their ambition.

Gene: The Mask Of A Writer

We can see Gene isn't really a fan of BL writing and the tropes associated with it. In fact, he deplores it, he finds it hard to write about, and he doesn't think there's any substance to them. His focus is that what they portray is shallow, unimportant and toxic, just like how he sees the industry promoting them. It's why he's fine being an introvert; he feels safer in the confines of his home doing what he loves to do; writing, but he's decided, letting people in is not worth it. Mostly people from his industry who seem callous at times, greedy at best, and just corruptive. He disagrees with that and tends to want to distance himself from that. But what can he do? He wants to write, he wants to survive by doing what he loves to do, he wants to thrive in his job; however, he has to make sacrifices to get to that goal where he can comfortably write what he wants.

He's not really comfortable there, he wants to write something else (something with more depth, something with more understanding, something that makes him feel like him), but he can't, so he takes on a mask to keep on doing whatever he can for his ambition.  Writing is all Gene seems to have, from constantly being tired, irritated, and too focused on it to even take care of the state of his house, of himself, and of his relationships. Nothing is more important than writing. That's his ambition, what makes him happy, what makes him safe, what makes him comfortable. And that's very relatable; as an introverted writer my self, Gene finds an escape from the real world when he puts his mind at work, and he creates however slowly, the love and excitement he has for writing are being shadowed by the lack of belonging he feels for the genre he has to write about. The moral conflicts, the uncomfortable topics and just overall the shallow results of his stories. They don't mean anything to him, just a way for ends meet. And that must be incredibly frustrating and tiring. Yet Gene has to do it to get his ambitions done.

That's why it's funny/important that Nubsib is invading his space. Nubsib's presence is showing up and unravelling Gene's masks, his truths, his reality. Nubsib is pushing Gene out of his act and making him question his ambition and truth. But also, in a way, Nubsib is providing depth for Gene for this genre as he starts to be truly inspired by his unknown attraction and connection to Nubsib.

 The more the love becomes authentic, the more Gene starts to understand maybe why BLs might be written and why it might be loved by many fans because of that meaning of love that is portrayed when done correctly. So perhaps, Nubsib is making Gene realise more about the other side of things; maybe he offers a different perspective, especially since he's going to be one of those tropey BL characters.

Nubsib: The Mask Of A Lover

Nubsib is very much ambitious, he takes levels to make sure he gets to Gene, but also he hides his true self and wears a mask of two faces. Even his manager knows his real personality and says it; he's faking an image. He hides who he really is to Gene to come of nicer and sweeter, but also he does all of this to get his goal of making Gene trust him. Making Gene first think he's a good boy.  Now, of course, immediately, I notice his two-faced behaviour. I see red flags; this isn't a healthy way to pursue a lover; it's full of lies, secrets and not truly knowing the real person's character. So are we going to unveil more about his intentions, why he's so invested in Gene and what he gains from doing all this, this way? Why is he so ready to ensure this time, Gene doesn't escape or that he doesn't lose his chance to finally be with Gene.

Acting doesn't seem to be his agenda; Gene is, you know, which is why you can feel already from the bat that he knows Gene before. He's pretending they haven't met before/, or he's seen something in him that's made him want to be near him; that's fascinating and interesting, that's the lengths he's taking; to wear a mask to get what he wants. It's interesting because, in a way, his lying, manipulation and secrecy is the opposite of what his presence is going to be for Gene in the show. Remember, he's meant to add authenticity to Gene's life, and love, and vulnerability, and so it's worrying because it's almost like Gene is falling in someone who he doesn't even honestly know. But this is just episode 1; as much as yes Nubsib is manipulative and secretive, I think there are things we'll get to see about him that's still authentic, at least for now; one of the things that stay true is his feelings for Gene, that's what's driving him, and Gene who has been so devoid of that connection maybe that's why Nubsib has to find a way to break down his walls in that way. We can see it's not easy for people to see Gene's vulnerable side. Nubsib makes him vulnerable, and maybe Nubsib knows this about Gene if they have met before; maybe he knows this is the only he can maybe try to make Gene notice him since Gene is so quick to run back home and throw himself into his world of writing. But is it okay? No, it's still manipulative and deceitful, but I think it's going to have consequences. And I can't wait to see how that unfolds. You also see some parts of when his masks fall, and that's concerning Aey, which is funny because  I think they're the same type of people. This is why I'm intrigued by this show; they both will do whatever it is to get what they want.

Aey: The Mask Of An Actor

And then we have Aey; he's even more fascinating; he's pretending to like Nubsib for his own agenda. Even Nubsib can feel it. They've known each other for a while. They can read through each other's masks. That's why they have an interesting plot arc coming. The show does start by making note that he rarely would get a role this big because of his queer identity. Apparently, that's an issue/ problem with the industry (both in fiction and in reality, sadly). They think LGBTQ actors don't attract money if they're too 'queer',  so Aey is determined to get success, notice and fame. He's already found ways to get to this point by overhearing Nubsib when he finds out about the audition. Nubsib is already known and supported by people. Aey may be different. Maybe he's had to struggle to be noticed.

In a way, he's doing all he can to ensure this works for him, but in order to do so,  he also wears a mask and hides who he really is to everyone. In fact, the reason why he's chosen for the role is because even though he is queer, he doesn't seem like it. This is what was said in the show. The only person who seems to see him truly is Mhok, and that's an exciting development being hinted at. There's someone again who is connected to unravelling his mask and knowing his genuine authenticity. I think this is a big theme surrounding romance in this show.  So Aey is going to be an interesting obstacle, just like Sib, everything that comes out from his mouth are lies to get what he wants, maybe even his smiles and fake niceties aren't truly his character; he seems devious (not in a negative way), he seems cunning, like he knows how to be one step ahead. This is probably what he's made himself become to be chosen, noticed and taken seriously. To get what he wants. This makes him a fascinating antagonist; I don't think he's a villain, just someone who has a fascinating character arc in the show. I can't wait to explore it.

Hin: The Mask Of A Follower

And then there's Hin. As much as he's chirpy and nice and friendly to Gene, he seems quite, I won't say jealous, but he does show he wants the chance and opportunities Gene has with writing. He asks the manager by text as the audition happens,  to read his book and let him know if it's possible for publishing. It seems he tends to be overlooked; he's curious, wide-eyed, always looking positive, but what if this is also just a mask? What if we're gonna see more to this arc too. It'd be interesting to see if he'll feel annoyed at Gene complaining about having the opportunity he has to write BLs, when others may not be chosen the same way. But that's just a theory about Hin. If all the other characters are just as ambitious in getting what they want, what's to say, Hin wouldn't be later. What role would he play during the show's ending, perhaps just a supportive friend, a guide to help Gene deal with whatever comes, but it is interesting to know he also wants to write. My first thoughts always point to negative with that because it suggests rivalry. And I think rivalry is also an interesting theme, an occurrence that happens in the industry. So maybe there's more to him, or perhaps not.

So yeh ambition and masks and the lengths the characters would go to fulfil what's important to them in this show have been built up already. Most of our characters all share similarities of having to become or do something that doesn't pertain to the truth of who they really are. They see no choice in the matter; they have to do this to survive or to be happy. This industry is a competition, it's harsh, and you need adaptability, tough skin and methods to survive and get what you want. Especially since Lovely Writer is about the Acting industry as well. These characters all have to be actors somehow, Gene has to pretend he cares about BL, so he sells and makes it big, Nubsib has to pretend he doesn't know Gene, so he can win Gene's heart, Aey has to pretend he cares about Nubsib, so he becomes famous and supported by his fandom, and maybe even Hin has to pretend he's okay with following after Gene, so he can find opportunities to learn more about the industry and also find ways to publish his book. An interesting theme that occurs in real life. Obviously, as Gene and Sib fall for each other, those ambitions come out to the surface, become obstacles in the making, and they have to choose to sacrifice some of it for their love and happiness. One way or another, there's a consequence to not being who you are; somehow, the truth always comes out.  Okay, let's do this show. Let's get to know these characters. I certainly can't wait.

[lets-steal-an-archive]

They will falsely claim that everything is fine and that there is nothing wrong. They will try to first misdirect us or claim there is nothing to the allegations or circumstances.

If evidence is presented, they will seek to have it invalidated or claim that it is false, fake, or a product of vague conspiracies, but most certainly not true.

Any evidence presented, and those that present it will be attacked aggressively and vindictively. The better the evidence the more aggressive the attack. Individuals who are doing the right thing by reporting criminal acts, unethical behavior, or failings are to be discredited, humiliated, hounded and bullied—not even their families are to be spared if need be. The narcissist will engage supporters or enablers to simultaneously attack those who offer proof or evidence, even if it embarrassingly exposes their poodle-like behavior as that of spineless sycophants.

Foolproof evidence will be portrayed as false and the result of: pettiness, jealousies, bad actors, malicious individuals, negativity, haters, enemies, losers, conspirators, opposition, gain seekers, the faithless (usually seen in religious groups or cults), or as we are seeing now in American politics, “fake news” or “deep state” actors. There is always a large constellation of people to blame, the narcissist casts wide to see which vacuous claim resonates, especially with their supporters.

As they lash out with vindictiveness, the malignant narcissist will continue to talk about themselves in glowing terms; irrespective of their actual situation, as they are incapable of introspection, much less contriteness. They will trumpet their greatness, their achievements (real or imagined), their faux infallibility, and even portray themselves as worthy of being revered rather than reviled.

They will seek to find someone to blame for their troubles or downfall, preferably someone that cannot defend themselves. A scapegoat is always useful and when there is not a real one, one will be invented. If they are not promoted or fired, it is because a cabal at work was against them. If they cheat their business partners, it was because they deserved it. If the wife gets the kids in a divorce settlement, it is because of her dastardly attorney, not his abominable behavior. If they lose an election it is because of campaign managers, unappreciative voters, trickery, fraud, or some other kind of malfeasance on the part of a conspiracy (conspiracies are useful to the narcissist because they conveniently require no evidence). As they are not married to the truth, they will prattle countless baseless reasons that all point away, never at themselves.

As circumstances become dire, the narcissist will not take any responsibility—EVER! Anything that has gone wrong is the responsibility of others. They will blame spouses as undeserving of their greatness, ignorant colleagues who just don’t measure up, the disloyal (Oh, they love to blame the disloyal), those who abide by rules and laws because ironically, they abide by rules and laws, or those that just clearly did not understand the very specialness of the narcissist. Everyone, and I mean everyone from people long gone, to the peripherally connected, to the earthly departed will be blamed for the failure or downfall of the narcissist. Once more it is never their fault.

In the process of casting blame, even the most loyal and stalwart will be discarded and denigrated if needed with reptilian indifference. For the malignant narcissist there is only the “good” — those that provide blind unwavering loyalty who are useful, and everyone else who is an enemy, useless, and thus “bad.” Whether you are in or out, good or bad, is not determined by history, by friendship, sacrifices, or how well you have performed in the past—it is determined by the capricious and selfish needs of the narcissist, and that can change in a moment.

Expect lies to increase and to be repeated exponentially. They will, even in light of factual evidence to the contrary, lie more profusely and adamantly. Lies are and always will be the number one tool of the malignant narcissist. The only difference now is that in facing failure or public ridicule, the lies must increase in frequency and audacity to the point of incredulity. The narcissist will expect supporters, the unethical, and enablers to lie for them or even create plausible alibies. That they imperil others by compelling them to lie is the collateral damage the malignant narcissist does as they thrash in despair when they are failing or caught.

And while lies will increase, so too will be the need to devalue others in order to further value themselves. They will attack everyone and anyone in the most vicious and vindictive ways. This is when we see their rage come through. Not just anger, but unbridled rage. They will say things that shock the conscience and they expect everyone to swallow what they say, much as their enablers do. The most decent of persons will be attacked, mocked, ridiculed, and turned into a human chew-toy as the narcissist unleashes untethered rage and hatred. They will dip down into a bottomless cauldron of antipathy and like an arterial spurt, will spew this toxic brew far and wide with metronomic regularity.

The malignant narcissist lacking guilt or a conscience, is only concerned with respect and not being publicly shamed. Any kind of public embarrassment will cause them further anger, further rage, further attacks, further unethical comportment, and unprecedented incivility.

If the narcissist is going to be brought down, they will also seek to bring everyone else around them down to vindictively make them suffer. How the narcissist vilifies, lashes out, or destroys others (spouse, friends, business partners, workmates, the general public) is up to the morbid creativity and depravity of the malignant narcissist, the viable tools they have available, and of course how dire or desperate the situation. The internet and social media are certainly useful as lives can be ruined with a single tweet. But so are guns and rifles, poison, and even assassins for hire. And if they command a country, they can put the security organs or the military to work on their behalf.

In certain situations, as the end nears, the suffering of others is paramount to the malignant narcissist. It is their way of elevating themselves—sick as that sounds—by malevolently paying back society with even more suffering. As they lash out, they will show no concern or empathy because they have none. If others are suffering because of their actions, the narcissist simply does not care. Lacking a conscience or any kind or remorse, much like Robert Hare’s psychopath, they sleep very well at night while everyone else is anxious, worried, stressed, physically or psychologically traumatizes all the while nervously and justifiably pondering what further malevolence will take place.

As they face failure, arrest, indictment, or dismissal, they will endlessly air their grievances. Narcissists are natural wound collectors and as such, they have been collecting and nurturing social slights and perceived wrongs just for this occasion. They will wallow in victimhood claiming they have been relentlessly and needlessly persecuted. They, of course, expect their attorneys, followers, or enablers to subserviently echo their flatulent claims.

[cherrytdatt]

Cold Nights

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Word count: ~4k

Summary: He loves the pub quiz night. She is a waitress in his favorite pub. The rest you already know.

A/N: this is the fluffiest I can get. Tell me if you liked. Oh! And tell me if you noticed any physical description.

Tom was excited about tonight. Like he was about every quiz night at the pub. He loved hanging out with his family and friends, and his competitive side always loved when they win.

"So...pub quiz...tonight...can we go to another bar? I found one not far from here and it looks cool," Harrison said, sitting on the couch on the opposite side where Tom was.

"It's okay for me," Harry said from the other couch, looking away from his notebook.

"I don't know, mate. I like our local pub. I don't wanna go to another one where I don't know who is the owner or the hosts," he explained. "Besides, the people in our local pub are used to us. When we go to another one people get all weird...you know?" he finished.

"Sure...and you saying this has nothing to do with the fact that you want to see Y/N because you fancy her since she started working at Ernie's?" Harry quipped with a playful smile.

"Shut up, man," Tom said, trying not to smile at the mention of the girl, but failing.

"Are you for real? I thought we were over this," Harrison laugh, looking between them.

"You divs. I just don't wanna go to another pub. Y/N has nothing to do with it," he said, still trying to control his smile.

"That's not what your face is saying," Harry said, drinking from his beer.

"Seriously, mate. Why you don't talk to her? She's always nice to you, more than she is with us. Maybe she's into you too," Harrison shrugged. "Besides you're a movie star, she would never say no to you," Tom rolled his eyes.

"I don't want her to go out with me because I'm famous," Tom said.

"Oh! But then you want her to go out with you?" Harry laugh.

"You two are idiots," Tom got up of the couch.

"Let's make a bet," Harrison said, making Tom stop and turn back to look at him. "If we lose tonight, you talk to her," he offered.

"W-what... what are you talking about? Why would I agree with that?" he laughed.

"Because if you don't talk to her, I will," Harrison said nonchalantly. "I mean...she's cute and nice...at least I would have a great time."

"What? You can't do this," Tom protested.

"And why is that?" Harrison said with a mischievous smile.

Fuck. He should've kept his mouth shut. "B-because..." Tom tried to think of a reason that didn't involve him confessing his interest in the girl. "Fine!" he gave up. "If we lose tonight, I talk to her," he agreed, offering his hand to seal the deal.

"Great!" Harrison said, shaking Tom's hand.

"I bet she'll turn him down," Harry said, earning an annoyed expression from his brother.

~

The pub quiz night was the best day of the week for you. Of course you had to work double, but you got so many tips. It worth it. Plus, you really enjoyed seeing all those people fighting to have their team name on the wall for a week.

"Y/N?! Why are you here so early?" your work friend, Jake, asked, entering the pub.

"I helped Ernie open the bar today," you said, cleaning the counter.

"Oh! How are you?" he went behind the bar and hugged you.

"I'm good. You?"

"Great. I just had an amazing day off, that I spent doing nothing with my cute boyfriend, so..." he said with a dreaming face.

"Please, can you get me one of those?" you joked.

"Weren't you dating that Kyle guy?" he asked confused.

"Please, that was two months ago, and he was a jerk," you said, returning to clean the counter.

"No way! Why you didn't tell me?" he said, moving things and setting the bar for the night.

"Eh...it wasn't a big deal," you shrugged.

"Anyways... I'm sorry babes," he said with a pout. "But hey! Today is pub quiz night. The pub will be full...who knows what can happen," he smiled, wiggling his brows. "Oh!!! You know who would be good?! That blonde boy that always comes with his friends. They won two weeks ago," he said animatedly. "To be honest, anyone from that table would be good," he laughed.

"You're crazy," you smiled at him.

"Yeah... I can be, but that table is yours if they show up," he pointed at you with a smile.

~

Soon the pub was packed and you were running from one side to another, serving pints of beer and food. You knew almost everyone who attended to puz quiz night since it was a local and small pub so, be nice to them was natural.

"Hey, look who's here," Jake pointed at the door, bringing your attention to the group of boys that were entering the pub.

"Shut up, Jake," you said, biting your lip and trying to hide a smile.

"That table it's yours! I just informed the others," he said, already leaving.

"What?" you asked, but he was gone. You waited a minute to see if anyone would take their order, but none of the others came even near their table. They were chatting happily, not even noticing that no one took their order. You took a deep breath, defeated, taking your pad from your pocket, and walking to the table. Suddenly, you felt very self-conscious about talking to them. Thanks for that, Jake.

"Goodnight, guys. How are you doing?" you asked, standing by their table and they stopped talking. Harrison covered a laugh with his hand, elbowing Tom, that was by his side.

"Hey, Y/N. We're good. How are you?" Harry said.

"I'm great," you smiled. "Are you guys ready to order?"

"Yep. Five pints, three fish n' chips, and two burgers,"  he said with a smile.

"Okay. I'll be right back," you said, smiling at them one more time and leaving the table. You walked to the bar, telling their order to Ernie.

"So... how did it go?" Jake asked while you waited for the middle aged man to hand you the beers.

"Oh! Great. Do you see the boy with brown hair?" you asked, and Jake nodded. "He's my boyfriend now. I think he's gonna propose to me soon," you said, sarcastically, and Jake rolled his eyes.

"You can joke whatever you want, but he's actually looking at you like he will propose soon," he said, a victorious smile appearing in his face when you turned your head to look at the boy with hopeful look. "So, he's the one you want. And I thought the blonde was more your type," he was laughing now.

"You are an idiot," you said to him, leaving with the five beers.

 "Hey, everyone!" Emily, the pub quiz's host, said on the microphone, getting everyone's attention. "I'm your host, Emily," she said with a big smile. "Is everyone ready for tonight's quiz?" she asked, and some people cheered. "You guys know that tonight is the quiz night, right? Some people seem confused," she joked, and they laughed. "I'm gonna ask again. Is everyone ready for tonight's quiz?" she asked more excited, and people cheered louder. "Great. Tonight's theme is football, more precisely, FIFA World Cup," people cheered again. "So... good luck to everyone, I hope you're ready to exercise your brains...or just get drunk," she joked.

~

The night went on with the rounds, and questions, and people got more and more excited and drunk. Sometimes you stopped, laughing at some joke or innocent arguments that the players were having. Sometimes you helped the people you were serving, cause you were nice, and you didn't like to see people struggling with the wrong answer.

"...you're just stupid man. I'm telling you, Ronaldo was the last one to score at the final," Harrison said when you approached their table.

"Why are you being like this? It was not! You just want us to lose!" Tom whisper yelled at him.

You took their empty bottles, replacing them for full ones. They looked up, noticing you, Tom's eyes went wide.

"I think he is right," you said to Harrison, pointing to Tom.

"Thank you," Tom looked at Harrison with a triumphant smile, and Harrison just rolled his eyes. "Can you tell us who it was... the last one?" Tom asked quietly, after a few seconds. His smile was gone because he didn't know the right answer too.

You looked from one side to another, checking if anyone could hear you, while the boys looked at you with hopeful eyes. "It was Dunga. A brazilian player," you whispered, making the boys smile.

"Are you sure?" Harrison asked not fully convinced.

"Prety much," you smiled.

"Fine, let's put him then," he agreed.

"I owe you guys a beer if I'm wrong," you said and walked away.

"Okay! Our time's up," Emily said, and everyone stopped writing their answers. "Oliver will collect your answers now. You may wat to tweet about how bad you did," Emily joked. As soon as Oliver finished collecting the answers, she was back at the microphone. "So let's see the answers now," she said with a smile. She read the seven first questions between cheers and mop from the players. "Question number eight," she said and you stopped at the bar, listening to the question you had helped the boys with. "Who was the last player to score at the last game in 1994's World Cup?" she waited for a second. "Dunga. He was the captain of the Brazilian team," she said and you smiled, searching for the boys in the crowd. Tom was looking at you with a sweet smile, and you felt your stomach fluttering. Harry followed his brother's eyes, seeing that they were on you. He said something, and everyone at the table looked at you, making Tom hide his face, annoyed. You tried to ignore that, resuming to take orders and serve beers.

A few minutes after that, you saw one of the boys signaling to you. "Hey," you said with a smile, when you got to their table. “Do you guys need anything?" you asked softly.

"How did you know that?" Sam asked without even waiting for anyone to say something.

"I watch a lot of football," you said with a grin.

"Do you have a boyfriend?" Tuwaine joked, and you two laughed. "No, but seriously, do you?" he said with a serious face, but you knew he was joking.

"No, I don't," you said with a laugh. "But I have to warn you, watching football it's probably my only quality," you fake whispered to him, cupping your mouth with one hand.

"I don't care. I take it," he said.

"Hey! Get in line, man," Hary said to Tuwaine. "Tom saw her first," he joked and you felt your cheeks getting hotter.

"SHUT UP, HARRY," Tom yelled at his brother, which only made everyone laugh even more. "Jesus! I'm sorry," he said, looking at you. "They are idiots who don't know how to behave," he apologized.

"It's okay," you said with an awkward smile. "So what do you guys need?" you said after a few seconds in silence, the boys holding a laugh. They made their order and you left.

"I'm gonna kill you!" Tom said when you left, but you still could hear him.

~

Almost an hour later the quiz ended, and the boys lost. "Can I do this another day, please?" Tom pleaded, but all the boys shake their heads no.

"You're doing this today. We made a deal, and you shook my hand!" Harrison said.

"But look at her...she looks tired, and you guys already annoyed her today," he said, pointing at you, serving another group a few tables from them.

"She's not annoyed! You're annoyed. She was laughing with us. You were the only grumpy one," Sam said.

"Mate, If you don't talk to her, I'm the next one in line. Get it together," Tuwaine said, jokingly. Tom stared at them for a few more seconds. "Well, I'm going then..." Tuwaine started getting up.

"NO!" Tom said, pushing him back. "I'll go," he said, defeated. "Divs..." he groaned, getting up.

You were going to the bar, and Tom felt a little relieved. At least, if you rejected him, he won't have a crowd around. He ran his hand through his hair anxiously. "Hey..." he said, leaning on the counter by your side.

"Hi!" you said, looking at him with a smile. "I'm sorry. Do you guys need something? I didn't see you calling me," you said, looking at his table.

"No. We're okay," he said, clearing his throat. "Hum...to be honest, I...um...I kind of made a bet with them," he pointed at his table, and your eyes glanced at them. They were all looking at you two, smiling, and then looked away, noticing you.

"A bet?" you asked confused.

"Yeah...that I would...um...if we lost...I would ask you out," he said, rubbing his hands together. You were so confused. You were a bet to them? I mean, you knew you weren’t insanely hot, but you weren't ugly either. At least, that was what you thought. But now, you needed someone to lose a bet to ask you out? That was new. "Oh NO! No no no! Not like that!" Tom said, noticing the weird look on your face. "It's not because you're ugly or something like that," he was a disaster. "Actually, I think you're very very pretty..." he rambled on and you smiled a little. "But I never had enough courage to ask you out. So they said that, if we lost today, I would have to talk to you," he explained. "I'm sorry, I'm not very good at this," he said with an apologizing smile. "You can say no, we're good," he said.

You looked at him, and them to the boys, who were watching the interaction. "Your friends made you do this?" you asked, perpetuating his agony for a few more seconds.

He nodded. "They are idiots, I know," he said.

You looked at him again. Ever since you started working here, you knew the boys. And since your first pub quiz night, you always wanted to talk to Tom. But life went on, and you settle to admire him from afar. "I work almost every night, and the nights I'm not working, I have to study," you said.

"I understand," he said with a sad face, looking at his feet, preparing himself to leave, humiliated.

"But..." you started again, and he stopped, looking at you again. "I finish here at eleven-thirty. If you wanna go out later," you said with a smile. "We can go eat something," you shrugged.

He smiled, a look between doubt and hope in his face. "Are you sure? You don't have to do this because of them," he said, making sure you wanted to go out with him.

"I'm sure if you're sure," you said.

"I've never been more sure," he smiled widely, making you smile too. How did he manage to be this cute?

"Okay! So, it's a date," you said, offering your hand for him to shake, and he took it, holding a little longer than he needed.

"It's a date!"

He walked back to his table, and you tried to hide the smile that was forcing his way to your face when you saw Tom's friends cheering.

~

Your shift was finally over. You counted your tips with Jake by your side.  The night was better than you could imagine. You got more tips then you expected, and that was going to help a lot with your bills.

"So... how was it with the boy? I saw you two talking," Jake asked after you finished counting your money.

"You're an asshole, you know that, right?" you said, hiding a smile.

"Shut up. By the smile you had, I know things went well," he said.

You shook your head at him. "He asked me out," you said and he cheered. "But I don't think it'll happen," you cut him off.

"And why is that?" he asked confused.

"Because I told him I got out at eleven-thirty, and he said he would be here, but as you can see," you looked around you, "He's not here," you couldn't help the sadness in your voice saying that last part.

"Oh! What a jerk! Don't worry, next week I’ll ‘accidentally’ drop some beer on him," Jake said, hugging your shoulders and you laugh. "I'm sorry," he said after a few seconds, noticing you were really sad.

"It's okay," you forced a smile. "Now, let's go. I really wanna sleep now," you said, getting up and he followed you.

"Ernie, we're leaving," Jake announced.

"Bye Ernie," you said, picking up your purse and waving goodbye.

"Bye, kids. See you tomorrow," he said before you left.

"Oh! Would you look at that," Jake said surprised, getting your attention. You followed his eyes, seeing the curly-haired boy seated on the short brick wall that followed the riverside in front of the pub.

"Hey," Tom said with a smile, getting up, and walking to you.

"I think I'm going home alone," Jake said. "You two have a good night," he said with a grin. "Call me tomorrow..." he pointed at you and you shook your head, looking at the ground.

"Hi," you said after Jake left. "I thought you had stood me up," you said, putting your hands in the pockets of your denim jacket.

"I would never do that," he said, smiling.

"That's good," you said, changing your weight from one foot to another. You were feeling your stomach do flips inside you and his smile wasn't helping you now. "So...where are we going?" you asked, breaking the silence.

"I don't know. Do you want to eat something?" he asked, and you nodded. "We can head this way, then. There's a place two blocks down," he said, and you agreed. "Do you live nearby?"

"Yeah, a few blocks away from the river," you said when you started walking.

You two talked all the way to the bar. He asked a lot of things about you. He was funny, and without even trying, he was cute. He told you about his work, and how he normally doesn't go out because people always freak out when they recognize him. And that was one of the things he liked about Ernie's pub. They knew him for so long that he was just another customer.

You told him about your life as a college kid who works and goes to classes. He seemed very interested, asking about what you would gonna do after graduation, the things you liked to do, and the things you disliked. At some point, during dinner, he leaned closer to you, your legs were touching, and his arm brushing against yours. His smile was perfect, forming those crinkles around his eyes, the scrunched nose when he was animatedly telling some story, the voice between gritted teeth when he was embarrassed or trying to be funny and the laugh that got caught in his throat when you told him something funny. By the way, that was the thing you loved more. How much he laughed at the things you told him. You were usually awkward so, be funny was your way of dealing with things, and when someone laughed at your jokes, that was everything to you.

You kept talking until the waiter informed that the bar was closing.

"It's past two," you said looking at your cellphone.

"I didn't even notice the time passing," Tom said, putting his jacket.

"Me neither. I think that's what happens when you're having a good time," you smiled softly and he did the same. He got up, helping you with your jacket. He kept his hand on your lower back, guiding you outside. The cold air outside hitting you when you got out. You waited for Tom, that was holding the door so an old couple could walk out of the restaurant too. This boy was something else, you thought, seeing him greet the two and then, they left.

"Oh! It's cold," he said, closing the restaurant door behind him, and walking to you.

"Yeah, a little," you crossed your arms on your chest, shivering when you felt a wind hit you.

"Do you want...?" he said, extending his arm, offering it to hug you.

"Yeah, sure," you shrugged, getting closer to him without uncrossing your arms. He hugged you by the shoulders, rubbing your arm. You felt his warmth around you, and even though this was your first date, you couldn't feel more comfortable. He was the softest person you ever met, and at that moment, you wished this day never ended. "Thanks," you said with a low voice, and he smiled back. You two walked like that for a few minutes, talking, until you hugged his waist, absentmindedly. Your arm under his jacket. You only noticed where your hand was when he held your hand that was in his waist. His hand was soft, and sometimes he squeezed yours, like when he wanted you to stop before crossing a street or when he wanted to react to the story you were telling without saying a word.

"That's me," you said a little sad when you reached your front porch.

"Oh! Cool," he said, stopping by your side, and then turning his body a little to face you.

"Do you wanna call an Uber? It's a little late, and I would feel better if you called one," you said lightly. "I can wait with you," you offered.

"Sure, I will," he said, taking his cellphone from his pocket, and looking for the app.

"Let's sit," you suggested, sitting on the stairs of your building and he followed you, sitting by your side, closer than ever.

"He's five minutes away from here," he informed, putting the phone back in his pocket.

"I had a great time tonight, thanks for asking me out," you said when he looked at you. He hugged your shoulders again while his other hand rested on your knee, rubbing circles on your jeans.

"Me too. Thanks for accepting," he smiled. "And I'm sorry for the bet," he said.

"No problem. I'm glad they forced you to do this. God knows how long it would take for you to do it willingly," you laughed.

"Hey!" he said a little offended.

"Please, you go to the pub almost every week, and never talked to me more than a couple sentences. You were far from doing it without the bet," you laughed more.

"Shut up," he said through gritted teeth, holding a smile.

"I'm just kidding. I'm happy you did it, and that's what matters," you said, turning your laugh in a soft smile.

"I'm happy I did it too," he said, and his face was closer to yours. You could feel his breath on your cheek. You looked up, and your eyes glanced between his eyes and his lips. You licked your lips unconsciously, and his hand squeezed your leg, the arm on your shoulder bringing you even closer. "I'm sorry it took me so long," he said almost in a whisper. "I promise I'll be faster with the next step," his eyes lingered on your lips a little longer.

"And what is the next step?" you asked.

"This," he said, ending the space between you two. His lips capturing yours, easily and softly. You turned your body, and your hand hugged his neck. He lowered his hand that was your shoulder, hugging your waist. Your breath felt shorter, and a car stopping by your sidewalk got your attention.

You broke the kiss, earning a confused look from him. "Your Uber," you pointed to the car without looking away from him. He looked at the car, faking a sad expression. "That's what I call bad timing," he said through greeted, rolling his eyes. You laughed at his whining. "Can I call you tomorrow?" he asked, rubbing his hand up and down your arm.

"Sure," you smiled.

"Great. I'm gonna head home, then," he said, getting up, and you did the same.

"Talk to you tomorrow," you said, putting your hands on your pockets.

"Talk to you tomorrow," he replied, going down some steps, and then stopped, turning around to you. He cupped your face and kissed you one more time, quickly, which made your smile grow wider. "Good night!" he said, getting in the Uber.

"'Night," you said, your stomach fluttering like crazy.

That night you slept with a smile on your face and the feeling that things just changed forever.

[gstqaobc]

FROM THE MONARCHIST LEAGUE OF CANADA

As this Ecomm went to publication, we received word of the death, at the great age of 96, of Bill Silver, a significant benefactor of the League from its early days, and for many years a pillar of our Ottawa Branch.  We wished to remember him here: his ebullient spirit, fierce loyalty spoken gently, innate modesty and kindness.  Indeed Chaucer might have had forethought of Bill in describing one of his characters as a “very parfitt gentle knight.” May his ardent spirit rest in peace, and his memory be a blessing and example to us all.   LEAGUE ISSUES NEW FLYER: THE CASE FOR THE CROWN The League thought it timely and useful to issue, offer in its advertising and distribute as widely as possible - both via the website and in printed form - a new flyer which will give you, our members, ammunition to argue logically the case for the Crown in conversation with others, and, we hope, to distribute strategically. One never knows when such an item, left on a waiting room table at the doctor or dentist’s office, affixed to a supermarket or other community bulletin board, put through neighbours’ mail slots - the possibilities are many - will do good work for our cause. We hope you will both enjoy and profit from this item, and that many thousands will be distributed across the country. See item one in the WHAT CAN I DO FOR THE CANADIAN CROWN? section of this Ecomm, below, to read online and request printed copies.   And special thanks to our wonderful team of no less than seven translators, all francophones from La Belle Province, who so kindly volunteered to make the French version one that is accurate in expression and eloquent in its prose.                     WHAT CAN I DO FOR THE CANADIAN CROWN? Some suggestions for member activity during these times. We invite members to send additional ideas by return of email. 1.    How about asking the League to send you several print copies of our new flyer:  THE CASE FOR THE CROWN, or print them on your home computer:  https://www.monarchist.ca/index.php/publications and give them to others who may be unaware or sceptical of the importance of Canada’s constitutional monarchy, or even hostile to it. School teachers could be encouraged to read the League’s educational booklets, also available both online and in print at the same URL, or even to request a class set.   2.    When you read an editorial, opinion column or letter to the editor in a newspaper, or a tweet or Facebook post, critical of the Crown, don’t get mad - get even! In other words, use a temperate tone and logical argument to refute the writer’s attack.  Keep it brief: focus on the obvious flaws in reasoning, mis-statements of fact or name-calling substituting for logic.  Same goes for radio talk shows. In the long run, on all media, whatever the provocation, whatever the momentary satisfaction of ”giving them a piece of my mind” - an old adage remains true: “You catch more flies with honey.” 3.    Write your elected representative at the federal level to re-state briefly the reasons you support constitutional monarchy as our system of government,  and asking the MP whether not your view is shared. 4.    Once pandemic restrictions ease, try to make sure that Royal events - such as the upcoming 95th birthday of our Queen, 10th Wedding Anniversary of William and Catherine or 100th birthday of Prince Philip are celebrated both in your home but also among your wider family, your friends, your colleagues at the office,  your place of worship/faith community or service club. The League generally sends you some ideas to mark these celebrations. Remember, as they are incorporated into family life and public life, the     Crown becomes further embedded in the heart of the nation, and truly represents The Queen’s wish that it ”reflects all that is best and most admired in the Canadian ideal.” This is especially true when you go out of your way to include in your observance the newest members of our Canadian family, who generally are eager to participate in the traditions of their new homeland, and in turn to share their own traditions with the wider community. 5.    Always use a Queen stamp when you write a letter or pay a bill by mail. 6.     At events of ceremony, whether a Council meeting, a graduation, a civic celebration - whatever - make sure that the Royal Anthem is sung as well as the National Anthem. To the extent you can, discourage event organizers from having a soloist “perform” them. Far more pride and         learning develop from the untrained voices of loyal folk singing together. In that way, the Anthems are sung “with heart and voice” and not merely listened to.   A FINAL IDEA: AN ACT OF LOVING SUPPORT & THANKS Apart from the above, we think it would be enormously comforting and supportive for every one of us to  write a kind letter to The Queen, expressing your thoughts at a difficult time: her beloved husband ailing, a grand-child chiding other family members via sensational television, the drumbeat of the tabloids and the restrictions on her busy life caused by the pandemic.  A selection of letters, especially those from Commonwealth Realms, are indeed seen by The Queen - and their number and tone are summarized to Her Majesty. The address is - Her Majesty The Queen, Buckingham Palace, London SW1A 1AA, UK Theoretically you don’t need postage to write the Sovereign; in practice, it is safer to affix the international airmail stamp available from your local Canada Post outlet.   AN INTERESTING OPINION PIECE FROM TODAY’S DAILY TELEGRAPHWe thought you might be interested to see the following strongly-worded opinion piece, reflecting a good deal of the tone of recent British public opinion, rather different from much of the Canadian and US commentary. Meghan’s fake interview has real-world effects The Sussexes’ claims have undermined the monarchy and done lasting damage to the Commonwealth by Tim Stanley, March 15, 2021 Two headlines appeared on the BBC News website on the same day. At the top: “Harry and Meghan rattle monarchy’s gilded cage”. At the bottom: “The kidnapped woman who defied Boko Haram”. Well, that puts the Sussexes' problems in perspective, doesn’t it? Yet across Africa, one reads, the Duchess’s story has revived memories of colonial racism, tarnishing the UK’s reputation, and has even lent weight to the campaign in some countries to drop the Queen as head of state. The only nation that seems to think a lot of nonsense was spoken is Britain. In the wake of an interview that Joe Biden’s administration called courageous, British popular opinion of Harry and Meghan fell to an all-time low, and the American format had a lot to do with it. Oprah Winfrey is not our idea of an interviewer. She flattered, fawned and displayed utter credulity. Imagine if it had been her, not Emily Maitlis, who interviewed Prince Andrew over the Jeffrey Epstein allegations. “You were in a Pizza Express that day? Oh my God, you MUST be innocent! Tell me, in all honesty, though...did you have the dough balls?” This wasn’t an interview, it was a commercial for a brand called Sussex, a pair of eco-friendly aristo-dolls that, if you pull the string, tell their truth – which isn’t the truth, because no one can entirely know that, but truth as they perceive it. “Life is about storytelling,” explained Meghan, “about the stories we tell ourselves, the stories we’re told, what we buy into.” Meghan is a postmodernist. Just as Jean Baudrillard said the Gulf War never happened, but was choreographed by the US media, so the Royal narrative she was forced to live was fake, her public happiness was fake and, following that logic, this interview might involve an element of performance, too. People have challenged her claims, alleging contradictions and improbabilities, but one of the malign effects of wokeness is that you have got to be very careful about pointing this out. Why? Because wokery insists on treating a subjective view as objective truth, or even as superior, because it’s based upon “lived experience”. To contradict that personal perspective is perceived as cruel, elitist and, in Meghan’s case, potentially racist, so it’s best to wait a few weeks to a year before applying a fact check. In the meantime, affect sympathy. People would rather you lied to their face than tell them what they don’t want to hear. The result is profoundly dishonest, for I have never known an event over which there is such a gulf between the official reception, as endorsed by the media and politics, and the reaction of average citizens, who are wisely keeping it to themselves. Into that vacuum of silence steps not the voice of reason but bullies and showmen – like Piers Morgan, who said some brash stuff about Meghan’s honesty and, after an unseemly row on Good Morning Britain, felt obliged to resign from his job.  “If you’d like to show your support for me,” he wrote afterwards, “please order a copy of my book.” Dear Lord, was this row fake, too? I can no longer be sure, though I despised Good Morning Britain before and still do: it embodies the cynical confusion of emotion and fact, a show made for clicks, where even the weatherman has an opinion. So what is real in 2021? The Commonwealth, which does a lot of good in a divided world. The monarchy, which has been at its best during the pandemic, doing the boring stuff of cutting ribbons and thanking workers that, one suspects, Meghan never grew into (can you imagine her opening a supermarket in Beccles?). It contains flawed people, but that only adds to its realness, and they can adapt faster than you might think. Prince William got the ball rolling by telling reporters, who he is trained to ignore, that his family is not racist. His wife paid her respects to the murder victim Sarah Everard, demonstrating that she is neither cold nor silenced. I’d wager Kate does her duty, day after day, no complaint, not because she is “trapped”, as Harry uncharitably put it, but because she loves her family and believes in public service. Meghan and Harry have indeed prompted the Royal family to change: not in order to endorse their criticisms, however, but to answer them.

GSTQAOBC 🇨🇦🇬🇧🇦🇺🇳🇿

[violetsystems]

#personal

It was a pretty quiet September 11th around the city for a change. I took the train downtown for coffee near the river. I was all over the place yesterday. On foot, on skateboard, on train. On the platform, a woman who had been seated with her son approached me. She asked me softly what book I was reading. It was William Gibson's "Pattern Recognition." I had been carrying it mostly because I saw a woman holding a bag a few days prior with the words "always carry a book." You get clues from society sometimes of how not to be a douchebag. You learn to read the court. Know when to fake. Know when to pass the ball. Know when to dunk on a motherfucker. This was one time where I had a chance to follow through on that wager. I told her it was science fiction but written too long ago so that it just seems like reality. The least complex way I could explain it was science fiction meets advertising. I could hear her son groaning presumably in the background. Probably at me. But it was a thoughtful conversation. We both agreed that carrying a book was about as neutral as it gets. If someone wanted to talk to you they'd have to reference the literature you were holding. It beat doom scrolling through the news which we both agreed is always different but never changes. We also agreed books put us to sleep. I said that was probably why I liked to read them in transit so I could tune out the world. The train approached as she wished me a good day and I continued my journey of minding my own business. Chicago lately feels a little less intimidated by culture as it happens. Particularly in communities of color where I spend most of my time and foot traffic in. I don't really feel all that comfortable or at ease around white people for the most part. They're all too scared to be real and talk about anything unless they're drunk. One of my favorite white basketball players was inducted into the hall of fame. He's a cracker for sure but a Croatian American which is one third of my nationality. He was called "the waiter" in which he was famous for waiting to pass the ball at the right time. He won a game for the bulls with five seconds remaining. He could dunk from the foul line and so on. And he played on a team of athletes where he was the minority and got his due. He did well enough to get inducted in the Hall of Fame when all was said and done. But he achieved that through team work not through domination. I have all these situations where it might seem from a certain vantage point that I alone saved the day. That I'm some superhero. And my only power is getting along in the environment I'm in. An environment that people constantly report is unsafe, in flux and horribly toxic. It is when you don't do anything about it to change it And then again people are smart enough and connected enough to figure out ways to cope. That is if they talk to each other. It's not like New York or Hong Kong where everyone is so used to living side by side. Chicago loves to have space and defaults to awkwardness. It's gasping for air sometimes in that respect. You need to wear your heart on your sleeve at all times. What better than a good book?

It seems like I write one every week. There's so much to reference and yet it all seems like chaos to organize. I can get lost in my head for any number of reasons. The people I care about most are far away in some ways and not so much in others. But it is still all so very vague. Small interactions at least keep me from feeling attacked and isolated. I think we're all looking for a balance to be able to express what we feel out in the open normally. Everybody is so focused on crystalizing it online one sentence at a time. They react to a feed that's been frankensteined together for an ulterior agenda. You read it on the news and it must be true. And year after year it is never about you. They've since taken the model of activism and made it a fucking reality show with Usher. The prize culminates at the G20 where you face the secret tribunal and receive funding for your cause through some bizarre sectarian ritual. I'm sure this is not the truth of it. But activism like reading should be a passively active goal. It should be your compass on the high seas of adventure in a city like this. The reward should be the conversations you unlock. The things you can reflect on and write about. How I don't really feel self conscious talking to people on the spot anymore. If a member of the opposite sex came up to you and asked what you were reading what impression would they leave you with? I'm already changing the world around me. And there's things that I've done in the past that are great trivia but don't speak for the real me. I was invited to see some people dj down in Chinatown last night. It was by the river in a park. I had just gotten back from Little Italy to get Hong Kong style Indian food at a restaurant called Siri. All of this is within walking distance if you don't mind shin splints. Everybody can tweet away how they're afraid to visit Chicago for fear of getting shot by the gangs. I am on foot ninety percent of the time. There's crime and then there's crime. And then there's what five media conglomerates owned by five billionaires have to say about it. This is why I listen to publicly funded radio. I hurried back, burnt my mouth on dal makini and jumped back on the bus to the park. Everybody was there that I knew from footwork and magic the gathering. An impossible mix of people who nonchalantly know you as violet systems moreso than Tim. I hung out for an hour and left around eight thirty. I took another long walk home over an empty bridge overlooking the city. I did this all alone. Aside from the people I run into from the neighborhood on the block. I was free to do so. And Chicago is still that place no matter how mad I get at it. And it isn't going anywhere.

Seemingly neither am I. For all the bullshit I write about how frustrated I am with things, people do eventually get the message. Would you rather have them understand it organically or force your perspective? You can repeat the same thing over and over again and it becomes tired. About how you are so progressive that nobody in your city has actually heard of you. About how you are doing all these things to fix the future but aren't living life in the present. All it really takes is letting the world know you are stable. Getting your own chaos in order and operating from there. Maybe you inspire someone along the way. Maybe you start a conversation that has nothing to do with you. But it all starts with communication. Knowing when you've said enough. Knowing that simply showing people another side of you may change the dialogue. Living by example and not just talking about it. Maybe understanding that it isn't constructive to be fighting with the universe all the time. Maybe the peace we seek to achieve on the global level starts with the conversations within ourselves and not the society trying to galvanize public opinion. If we could just help people feel normal again maybe we would all deserve normalcy. September 11th was a horrible thing caused by an outdated mindset across the board. It is twenty years later and we still cower in fear. Mostly of our own country's shadow if we are Americans. We have since thought of our freedom as something to be shaken out of other people. To rattle and provoke each other to show our true selves like a bull in a glass house. We don't start small. We get egged on and thrown in such a paranoid mind state that we think everyone is out there just to roast us. We constantly feel we have to prove our patriotism to a peanut gallery of billionaire funded social networks. We chase money in the present instead of investing in better futures. We don't know when it's our time to pass the ball. Working as a team, you fear you will be forgotten. That somehow you won't get your slice of the bloated pizza pie and unevenly distributed future of the American dream. But we all live here oblivious to the freedom we have to build it back better ourselves. The billionaires aren't walking on these streets. They're blind to how it really works. Maybe it just starts with a book and an honest question. What am I reading these days? I'm reading into all the signals and they're coming back clear. Whatever I've written in the past is just context for whatever I write about in the future. And the future holds less terror because I am less fearful of being misunderstood. I still wear that bright pink heart on my sleeve. It's the team I represent. I'm just waiting for the right time to dunk from the foul line. For now I pass it back to you all until next week. <3 Tim

[sunflowercanyonx]

There is nothing that angers me more than hypocrisy. Being a 1D fan for 5 years and now a solo harrie. I see it all the time.

I want to address the recent situation on twitter. For years, Louies and Larries have dragged people off their accounts and manipulated them. They play the victim constantly. In fact if someone in harry’s fandom ‘messes up’ they are brutally attacked. However there is a pattern if one of their update accounts is insensitive they have this ‘it’s okay!! you did nothing wrong’ energy. They preach mental health and only apply it to themsleves. They call us toxic just for promoting Harry and ‘bragging’ about his sucess. I used that word because in their eyes if we’re proud of harry we’re rubbing it in his face because he came from the same band that louis did.

This has been going on for years. Here are some examples of when larries/Louies took it too far.

Starting off with the most recent and drive for this post, @/HSDaily on twitter. HSDaily are a group of girls running one of the most popular harry update accounts. They have good representation within their account consisting of LGBT+ members and Black girls.

I won’t say job because i’m aware, stan twitter is not a job however they do work extremely hard. Their ‘role’ on the account is to provide updates but with their large following, also promote Harry and his music. So when they asked harry’s fans to do a tiktok challenge on Tiktok the other day louies were not happy. They thought this was stealing Louis’ fans ideas and unfair because it was meant to be a ‘louis’ thing.

Firstly, i’d like to say that every artist and their fandoms promote stuff on tiktok. But secondly, Harry is not in one direction and neither is Louis. So why,,,, does this take the attention of Louis? surely if you have confidence and faith in your face it wouldn’t matter what other artists are doing. Tell me why hsdaily lost thousands of followers in 24 hours but a popular louis account that was exposed for tweeting child porn barely lost any? @/KingLWTPromo btw. BECAUSE they don’t care about real issues. They only care because it’s a harry account. they associate all harries as toxic and want to bring him down so much because he outshines their fav. They preach about not comparing them yet everything harries do they have an issue with.

Louies are mad at HSDaily (which includes black people) For not stanning Louis. They are a harry update account. They are not obliged to do anything wirh your fav. And if he makes them feel uncomfortable you don’t have a right to overstep their feelings. They are so mad one individual even went out their way to make false claims agaisnt hsdaily.

I don’t know what people expected out of making these claims. OF COURSE they were going to defned themsleves. If someone was calling you homophobic wouldn’t you do the same? I’m currently unaware on this girls situation as there has been rumours going around. Some are saying she faked her suicide, some aren’t so I won’t comment on that. However she made a fake claim against hsdaily. they defned themsleves. And now they are getting the blame for her apparent ‘suicide’ ?

I’m sorry whAT. these people are preaching be kind and mental health is important yet have trended hashtags and instantly put the blame on hsdaily. The sad thing is this is nothing to do with the girl. This is them hating the idea of Harry and his platform. They hate this account has so much attention and is even followed by the official HSHQ account. They aren’t even cancelling this account for the right reasons. The sad thing is this all started because they were upset over hsdaily doing a tiktok challenge for HARRY.

statement from hsdaily below:

I think the fact that Louies are blaming someone else for someone’s suicide says it all. What does that say about you as a person? stop preaching for people to talk about mental health if you’re degrading and pulling someone else done. Stop saying shit then ending your sentence with TPWK and thinking it justifies what you’ve said.

These Louies and larries attack people, attack harry, attack harries then when these people defend themsleves they are always ruled out as the toxic ones and i’m so sick of it. it’s so babyish. 11 year olds.

The following screenshots show a pattern of when these people have done this to big platforms in the past. they are vicious and toxic if you don’t agree with them. One even involved larry... harry and louis don’t even agree with your ship and you don’t treat them like that so why would you treat an innocent man like that?

This has to be noticed. These people are constantly calling Harries toxic yet NEVER take responsibility for their own actions. This is so embarrassing for them. They really don’t care that they have tantrums over stupid shit all the time and drive people off their accounts and away from what makes them content.

I’m so done with arguing with them. I’m so done with them making everything about harry deeper than it is. Making his fans out to be bad by just supporting him. I’m so done with them associating Harry with a non existence ship and i’m DONE with the way they treat people and get away with. You think because your fav talks to people like shit as a joke it’s a personality trait.

There is no care for the way these people have mentally affected others. There is absolutely nothing I can say to sort it however because they’ll never stop. they constantly have an issue with harry having his own fans. so from this point forward we move on.

we ignore their tweets

we block them

we don’t give them the attention

giving them attention is affecting too many people now. they get away with so much shit, but that’s Louis’ fandom. harry has harries who are here to support him. if they want to support harry, good for them. But the more we leave them alone the less attentjon they’ll get. Louis can’t make a charting song. If so many of them can put this energy into hating trending hashtags and being vicious surely they could put that attention into streaming their fav? i mean there seems to be lots of them on twitter yet silence on the charts.

I have no words for what’s happened over the last 24 hours. I wish louies cared about important issues and had morals but they don’t. Harries are successful in calling harry out when they need too.

Stop driving people of their accounts because they don’t agree with you. weirdos.

[owletarc]

an update.

so as most of you know, i yesterday reblogged a post that detailed the apparent suicide of a girl in the rwby fandom because she shipped omens, otherwise known as qrow x blake. i had im'd the blog owner personally to reach out with my condolences and though i was later a little hesitant around the topic; i, like many others, was even more hesitant to go and accuse someone of lying about something as serious as suicide. i also made a twitter thread, @ing rooster teeth and some of the va’s / show runners, as i thought this was something that needed to be addressed on a much bigger scale. this thread was also referenced in hero hei’s video here. whatever your thoughts on him, i don’t care, this post is not the place for it.

recently it’s come out that this was all a hoax. the blog has been deleted (hence why i had to show it on the wayback machine) and i am just ... i have no words. i went to sleep last night thinking that something awful had happened and that this was the lowest we’d come as a fandom. that a girl had died for daring to ship a “problematic” ship.

only to find out that wasn’t true and i, like many, had been taken for a ride. we had been lied to and i feel so utterly disgusted and enraged about this. i feel guilty because i feel like i should’ve done my due diligence more, i should’ve questioned the situation more. i should’ve, and i didn’t and for that i apologise.

however i do want to also clear up some misconceptions from what has come on my end.

i am not theblackcatandthecrow, tj, cleo or whoever else. i have had nothing to do with these blogs and my first interaction was by reblogging their post, the letter to the fndm. the only rwby blog i have is this one and my monos sideblog, no other.

i am not part of this hoax. i too was duped and i am thoroughly disgusted and upset by this as much as others are.

i tagged rt and other vas / show runners in those tweets, not because i thought it was something they had to “fix” but because they have fostered this environment in the fndm with their own silence and unprofessionalism. the way a fandom acts starts and stops with the very top of it, the show themselves. rt can’t afford to be silent any longer, because for every hoax like this, there’s 20 more instances of harassment that haven’t reached suicide but people are still suffering. this fandom is one of the worst for it in all that i’ve seen, and i’ve seen a lot.

i will say, not in tj’s defense, that this has gotten a lot of people talking about a problem that has plagued the fandom for a long while. the harassment of people with “problematic” ships, the death threats, the bullying, the hatred  —  it’s all gone too far. we didn’t lose someone, but the fact that people thought it was possible and believed in it like i did, is so fucking telling.

not long after this i was threatened on another server by someone who i will keep anonymous, because i don’t want to send harassment their way. it will only continue the cycle. all i will say to them is if you want to drive to liverpool or wales looking for me, looking to be violent towards be; go ahead. both places are big places, and i have my dogs for a reason. if you want to assault a mentally ill jewish traveler, if you want to assault ANYONE because they said something you didn’t like; then you need to take a deep look within yourself.

i believed this situation because it’s not too dissimilar to another i’ve been in, both in this fandom and another (naruto.) i was harassed and threatened and called a pedophile and a child abuser for shipping an age gap ship. the reason i use a fake name online (twice, both owl and lilac) is so that situations like this cannot reach and impact my real life. my aim is to work with abused kids, situations like this could put something like that dead in the water before it would even begin. it’s already nearly happened in this fandom before, with someone who shipped ironweiss.

this post is part an apology, part a response and part a plea.

we need to stop putting pixels above living, breathing people. if you don’t like a ship, like i said in my twitter thread, you move on. you block tags, you block people and blogs, you look at what makes you happy instead. you do not send hate or harassment or death threats because someone wants to see two fictional characters be together and you don’t like it.

this time, the worst outcome was avoided and though i’m horrified and disgusted it was a hoax, i’m glad this fndm hasn’t actually killed someone. but next time, we might not be so lucky.

for anyone who is suffering, or has suffered this type of harassment and abuse, please come to me. my blog is open, i’m here to lend an ear. no matter the ship, whether i personally agree with it or not, i’m here because i don’t want us to reach that worst outcome. i’ve been in the same spot and those demons still fight me, today worst than most days.

reach out. there’s always someone to lend a hand.

[johnrossbowie]

LEAVING TWITTER

I wrote this earlier in the fall, before the election, after dissolving my Twitter account. I wasn’t sure where to put it (“try up your ass!” – someone, I’m sure) and then I remembered I have a tumblr I never use. Anyway, here tis.

How do you shame someone who thinks Trumps’ half-baked policies and quarter-baked messaging put him in the pantheon of great Presidents? How do you shame someone so lacking in introspection that they will call Obama arrogant while praising Trump’s decisiveness and yet at the same time vehemently deny that they’re racist? How do you shame someone for whom that racism is endearing and maybe long overdue?

You don’t. It’s silly to think otherwise.

Twitter is an addiction of mine, and true to form, my dependence on it grew more serious after I quit drinking in 2010. At first it was a chance to mouth off, make jokes both stupid and erudite and occasionally stick my foot in my mouth (I owe New Yorker writer Tad Friend an apology. He knows why, or (God willing) he’s forgotten. Either way. Sorry.) I blew off steam, steam that was accumulating without booze to dampen the flames. Not always constructive venting, but I also met new friends, and connected with people whose work I’ve admired for literal decades and ended up seeing plays with Lin-Manuel Miranda and hanging backstage with Jane Wiedlin after a Go-Go’s show and exchanging sober thoughts with Mike Doughty. When my mom passed in 2018, a lot of people reached out to tell me they were thinking of me. This was nice. For a while, Twitter was a huge help when I needed it.

I used to hate going to parties and really hated dancing and mingling, but a couple of drinks would fix that. Point is, for a while, booze was a huge help, too.

But my engagement with Twitter changed, and I started calling people my ‘friends’ even though I’d never once met them or even heard their voices. These weren’t even penpals, these were people whose jokes or stances I enjoyed, so with Arthurian benevolence I clicked on a little heart icon, liked their tweet, and assumed therefore that we had signed some sort of blood oath.

We had not. I got glib, and cheap, and a little lazy. And then to make matters much worse, Trump came along and extended his reach with the medium.

There was a while there where I thought I could be a sort of voice for the voiceless, and I thought I was doing that. I tried very hard to only contribute things that I felt were not being said – It wasn’t accomplishing anything to notice “Haha Trump looks like he’s bullshitting his way through an oral report” – such things were self-evident. I tried to point out very specific inconsistencies in his policies, like the Muslim ban meant to curb terrorism that still favored the country that brought forth 13 of the 9/11 hijackers. Like his full-throated cries against media bias performed while he suckled at Roger Ailes’ wrinkly teat.  Like his fondness for evangelical votes that coincided with a scriptural knowledge that lagged far behind mine, even though I’m a lapsed Episcopalian, and there is no one less religiously observant than a lapsed Episcopalian. But that eventually gave way to unleashing ad hominem attacks against his higher profile supporters, who I felt weren’t being questioned enough, who I felt were in turn being fawned over by theirdim supporters. If you’re one of these guys, and you think I’m talking about you, you’re probably right, but don’t mistake this for an apology. You suck, and you support someone who sucks, and your idolatry is hurting our country and its standing in the world. Fuck you entirely, but that’s not the point. The point is that me screaming into the toilet of Twitter helps no one – it doesn’t help a family stuck at the border because they’re trying to secure a better life for their kids. It doesn’t help a poor teenager who can’t get an abortion because the party of ‘small government’ has squeezed their tiny jurisdiction into her uterus. It doesn’t help the coal miner who’s staking all his hopes on a dying industry and a President’s empty promises to resurrect it. I was born in New York City, and I currently live in Los Angeles. Those are the only two places I’ve ever lived, if you don’t count the 4 years I spent in Ithaca[1]. So, yes, I live in a liberal bubble, and while I’ve driven across the country a couple of times and did a few weeks in a touring band and am as crushed as any heartlander about the demise of Waffle House, you have me dead to rights if you call me a coastal elitist. And with that in mind, I offer few surprises. A guy who grew up in the theater district and was vehemently opposed to same-sex marriage or felt you should own an AR-15? THAT would be newsworthy. I am not newsworthy. I can preach to the choir, I can confirm people’s biases, but I will likely not sway anyone who is eager to dismiss a Native New Yorker who lives in Hollywood. I grew up in the New York of the 1970s, and that part of my identity did shape my politics. My mom’s boss was gay and the Son of Sam posed a realistic threat. As such, gays are job creators[2] and guns are used for homicide much more often than they are used for self-defense[3]. I have found this to be generally true over the years, and there’s even data to back it up.

“But Mr. Bowie,” you might say, though I insist you call me John - “those studies are conducted by elitist institutions and those institutions suck!” And again, I am not going to reason with people who will dismiss anything that doesn’t fit their limited world view as elitist or, God Help Us, fake news. But the studies above are peer-reviewed, convincing, and there are more where those came from.

“But John,” you might say, and I am soothed that we’re one a first name basis - “Can’t you just stay on Twitter for the jokes?” Ugh. A) apparently not and B) the jokes are few and far between, and I am 100% part of that problem.

I have stuff to offer, but Twitter is not the place from which to offer it.

After years of academically understanding that Twitter is not the real world, Super Tuesday 2020 made the abstract pretty fucking concrete. If you had looked at my feed on the Monday beforehand – my feed which is admittedly curated towards the left, but not monolithic (Hi, Rich Lowry!) – you’d have felt that a solid Bernie surge was imminent, but also that your candidate was going surprise her more vocal critics. When the Biden sweep swept, when Bernie was diminished and when Warren was defeated, I realized that Twitter is not only not the real world, it’s almost some sort of Phillip K. Dickian alternate timeline, untethered to anything we’re actually experiencing in our day to day life. This is both good news and bad news – one, we’re not heading towards a utopia of single payer health care and the eradication of American medical debt any time soon, but two, we’re also not being increasingly governed by diaper-clad jungen like Charlie Kirk. Clouds and their linings. Leaving Twitter may look like ceding ground to the assclowns but get this – the ground. Is not. There.

It’s just air.

There are tangible things I can do with my time - volunteer with a local organization called Food On Foot, who provide food and job training for people experiencing homelessness here in my adopted Los Angeles. I can give money to candidates and causes I support, and I can occasionally even drop by social media to boost a project or an issue and then vanish, like a sort of Caucasian Zorro who doesn’t read his mentions. I can also model good behavior for my kids (ages 10 and 13) who don’t need to see their father glued to his phone, arguing about Trumps incompetence with Constitutional scholars who have a misspelled Bible verse in their bio (three s’ in Ecclesiastes, folks).

So farewell Twitter. I’ll miss a lot of you. Perhaps not as badly as I miss Simon Maloy and Roger Ebert and Harris Wittels and others whose deaths created an unfillable void on the platform. But I won’t miss the yelling, and the lionization of poor grammar, and anonymous trolls telling my Jewish friends that they were gonna leave the country “via chimney.” I will not miss people who think Trump is a stable genius calling me a “fucktard.” I will not miss transphobia or cancelling but I will miss hashtag games, particularly my stellar work during #mypunkmusical (Probably should have quit after that surge, I was on fire that night, real blaze of glory stuff I mean, Christ, Sunday in the Park with the Germs? Husker Du I Hear A Waltz? Fiddler on the Roof (keeping an eye out for the cops)? These are Pulitzer contenders.). Twitter makes me feel lousy, even when I’m right, and I’m often right. There’s just no point in barking bumperstickers at each other, and there are people who are speaking truth to power and doing a cleaner job of it – Aaron Rupar, Steven Pasquale, Louise Mensch, Imani Gandy and Ijeoma Oluo to name five solid mostly politically based accounts (Yes, Pasquale is a Broadway tenor. He’s also a tenacious lefty with good points and research and a dreamy voice. You think you’re straight and then you hear him sing anything from Bridges of Madison County and you want him to spoon you.). You’re probably already following those mentioned, but on the off chance you’re not, get to it. You’ll thank me, but you won’t be able to unless you actually have my email.

_______

[1] And Jesus, that’s worse – Ithaca is such a lefty enclave that they had an actual socialist mayor FOR WHOM I VOTED while I was there. And not socialist the way some people think all Democrats are socialist – I mean Ben Nichols actually ran on the socialist ticket and was re-elected twice for a total of six years.

[2] The National Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce, “America’s LGBT Economy” Jan 20th, 2017

[3] The Violence Policy Institute, Firearm Justifiable Homicides and Non-Fatal Self Defense Gun Use, July 2019.

[5sosbitchfest]

Alrighty, Nonsters.  We currently have 290 Asks in our box!  As much as we might try, I know there is NO WAY we’re going to be able to get through all of them.  Everything exploded this weekend when MessyGate went down!   I don’t want to ignore any asks just because I already answered a similar one.  So, I’ve tried to gather as many similar Asks as possible to let your your voices be heard.  Y’all are definitely NOT alone in your feelings.  Get ready for a lot of opinions on Messy’s Twitter Drama.  

Also, if you sent in an Ask and we haven’t answered it yet, please feel free to resubmit it!  I do try to scroll through all of them but it is a daunting task and personal stuff and work make it difficult for me to get through everything in a timely manner!

********************************

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: I’m really disappointed in Luke and this band in general, the way they deal with things. “honest policy” with messy? So he knew all of this and it was okay? Or he confronted her on this and he is okay with what she has done? I’m not sure this whole thing would be a deal breaker for me, but it certainly would make me real mad at my SO and some whiny excuses wouldn’t be enough to make things alright. Radio silence would’ve been much better than that story he posted, made himself look like a fool.

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: These girls will sooner or later become their downfall if their management or them does not realise they should rely on other things than bringing relationship up front to sell their music. I find it extremely bad that they are behaving as if nothing happened, I hope there will be changes once touring will be possible again and we won’t see these girls tagging along everywhere or being brought up in interviews all the time but somehow I’m not counting too much on that.

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: I wonder if Luke knows everything that Messy got exposed for or just the parts Messy wanted to show him. Bc Luke said in his Story that he wasn't online lately so maybe he wasn't on Twitter too and Messy just showed him the parts that make her look good and he still doesn't know that she spoke bad about Ashton or how she stalked the fans also after she knew that they didn't hack his email adress cause he wasn't on Twitter so he couldn't see the screenshots.🤷‍♀️

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: I'm just waiting for the day one of them date someone who isn't a part of their circle. tired of them passing around the same toxic girls.

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: These girls are just digging a whole for these guys and they want be able to get out of it soon

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: It was a chicken move for Sierra to do it as a reply and no one has talked on twitter that she deleted it because they probably think her deleting it is saying it wasn’t true

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: Am I the only one who thinks that guys really only heavily interact with us when they want to promote something or say something about the music? I do understand they have lives so being on Twitter isn't number one priority and with all the drama that surrounds this fandom its very easy to not want to be online a lot, I just can't help but feel that way

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: I'm talking about this messy situation (no pun intended) with my friend and she said to me that Messy should consider changing her career if she can't handle that not all people are going to like her. (that ofc doesn't include any form of harassment bc that's not cool)

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: I really don't know how to feel about the Luke situation. At first I was upset and disappointed of Luke but now I almost pity him bc real or not either the management would want Luke to defend her or Messy. And I think Luke isn't the kind of person who would stand up against the management or Messy (even though it would probably be better for him if he would). And most people don't realise when they're in a toxic relationship so I can't really blame him. I just hope this ends asap.

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: I literally was so angry and frustrated with Luke and this whole situation yesterday that I couldn’t even look at him on my home screen, I had to change it. It’s really a disappointing thing to witness. Whether management put him up to this or he genuinely believes this toxicity is okay, I’m just very grumpy with him at the moment. He deserves better and WE (the fans) deserve better.

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: I think Luke really needs to be in a relationship with sb who either isn't famous and doesn't want to be or with someone who is famous bc they have a successful career too and who doesn't need Like to be famous.

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: I’ve only seen a few accounts on Twitter who are attacking Messy and Crusty to the core and exposing every bad thing they’ve done with receipts for the sossies defending them! I’m happy that karma is finally getting to those con artist who think they can get away with anything

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: that recent lierra picture is photoshoped lmao. if you look at Sierra's hand you can see color coming off from it and her arm looks hella weird.her forehead looks hella weird and look couldn't have taken the picture because I doubt that he could stretch his arm that far and make a perfect picture. also we haven't even seen Sierra's face so I still don't believe they're together

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: The Lemon pic was like a punch in the face (even though Petunia and Luke are looking cute there). But I've been asking myself lately if Luke has seen the whole drama going around on Twitter or just the posts Messy wanted him to know so the ones who make her look like the victim (and not the ones where she insulted Ashton or she made it clear that she stalked his fans). Cause Luke said he hasn't been online lately.

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: I mean we dont know how much of the story he truly is aware of and how much s changed to fit her narrative and get L to feel bad for her. Plus he was under pressure from management to do damage control and not standing up for his gf is a very bad look for outsiders who dont understand why she's at fault. It was a pretty neutral statement and he was obviously told to make the post so I dont blame him and just blame her more for putting him in the situation in the 1st place

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: I wonder how much toxicity happens behind the scenes, we know S is very manipulative and L is very much a people pleaser so.. and with how much they have to sell their "love" and "happiness" in the relationship. Minipulation is a powerful thing and it could explain why hes out of touch with reality, especially lately since he's isolated with her and doesnt have the voices of the band to raise any concerns and he's been getting skinny again and seems very "meh" rather than happy, idk

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: I feel so disconnected with this fandom rn. I feel like no one is streaming CALM and that makes me sad bc it's such an amazing album. The boys aren't even online anymore, everyone is mad at each other and now Luke comes up with this shit... tbh I wish I would wake up tomorrow and see him tweeting something like yeah I'm sorry about my ig story I still love y'all lmao

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: Wait wait wait wait ive been gone from the fandom for a little while now and what the fuck is going on with Luke and S? What did S do that she made a fake ass apology for?? I’m so lost please help me! 😂

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: I'm seeing a lot of my mutuals unstanning and I'm just so mad bc Sierra started this drama and got Luke into it and I'm sad that people are leaving bc of this, it's just too much toxicity and it shouldn't affect the band and their connection with the fans but with Luke saying this he makes it seem like he supports the ugly things she does

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: I am a Luke stan and I've always loved him bc he has inspired me so much through the years but when he does this things it's like...damn. I feel like he's invalidating the fans' feelings by being like "if you don't like my girlfriend, ur fake" like he has never noticed me on Twitter or anything but my biggest fear is to be blocked by him or just ignored bc I don't like her (although I never expressed it publicly) n yeah anyways :// It feels weird

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: Going back and re-reading the DM’s messy literally confirms that she accesses Luke’s account by saying “we couldn’t get in” or some shit like that

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: I hate being a luke stan, sometimes it just seems like he doesn't care? he always puts these toxic gfs before the ones who adore him and pay his bills. might just move into Cashton's lane. unproblematic kings.

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: He literally posted a picture of him cuddling her and petunia within the hour

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: The saddest part of this situation is it’s like a repeat of Arzaylea. Luke has no idea what a respectful, mature relationship is. We saw it with Arz and were seeing it again it’s just a little bit different. He stays being controlled and manipulated by toxic partners. I really think homeboy needs to be single for a WHILE and focus on himself. He needs to unlearn the things his past and current relationships have taught him about love because if I know anything, it’s that this ain’t real love.

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: Is it bad that I just want the larzaylea drama back?? Like everyone could at least agree on their feelings then...

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: Just checked messy’s insta and of course, everyone that still supports her filled her tagged with just the single picture

Anonymous said to 5sosbitchfest: I feel like the reason Sierra is getting away with what she’s done is because she isn’t that known. Like yeah she’s associated with 5sos, but they’re also like not that big which is probably why it’s getting swept under the rug. I’ve only seen the 5SOS fandom calling her out for her actions. If this had happened with a well known celebrity, they probably would’ve been dragged and been trending on Twitter. I might be wrong but I feel like this is what’s happening which is just unfair.

[marshmallowgoop]

Goop Plays Kill la Kill the Game: IF (Ryuko Episodes 5-8)

It’s been a while.

Episode 5

Writing about these episodes has been a struggle. I wouldn’t be able to narrow down a single reason for my eight-month hiatus from IF’s story mode, but I can say that it’s difficult to talk about content that is overwhelmingly—and disappointingly—a rehash of scenes I’d already watched before.

Ryuko’s fifth episode especially feels like a game of “spot the difference.” Segments of Satsuki’s story are repeated with astonishingly minor changes, and while this has been an issue with earlier Ryuko episodes (1 and 3), by episode 5, it’s starting to feel very tedious.

I won’t deny that the slight alterations are charming—they very much are! Mako’s contribution to Ryuko and Senketsu’s fight against Nui, for example, is adorable:

Mako: My dad says, “When you’re outnumbered, get more weapons!” An eye for an eye, a blade for a blade!

However, such minimal additions feel like a dishearteningly poor use of the player’s time. If I hadn’t already questioned it before, these chapters really made me question the choice of a two-campaign story mode. 

It’s not that I don’t see the appeal of such a structure; there’s something fun in telling one side of a story and then changing the perception of that story by telling another side of it. Plus, with IF in particular, I think there was a goal—at least to some extent—of confounding players with Satsuki’s ending. I could see Ryuko’s campaign as a means of making the plot more interactive, which is of course fitting for a video game. By not spelling everything out right away, players are encouraged to unravel the mystery and put the pieces together. 

Satsuki: I had a bad dream....

But... there’s just too much overlap for me to feel that the two-campaign structure was the most effective storytelling decision. The choice perhaps makes more sense from a gaming standpoint; it’s easier to focus on one playable character rather than jump around between two. But I don’t know—perhaps it could have been fun to give players a feel for more of this game’s roster all at once. Maybe we could have played as the Elite Four or Ragyo or Nui, too.

Because from a story standpoint? One major letdown of Ryuko’s fifth episode is that actually fighting Nui completely lacks the power that the cutscene in Satsuki’s campaign has.

Sure, that scene certainly doesn’t have the impact of similar moments in the anime (episodes 18 and 21/22), but you can’t really expect it to, and it works well within the context of IF. Ryuko and Senketsu haven’t been through as much together, but Ryuko still keeps her temper under control to prevent a repeat of hurting Senketsu from it again, they burst into battle with “Before my body is dry” playing, and though the animations in the game can be stiff and limited, it’s still sweet. 

Ryuko: Won’t know ‘til I try! So let’s do this!

They sparkle! Their hearts are as one! They’re uniting to take down this threat.

But in Ryuko’s story? You just fight the fight. You miss out on Ryuko shit-talking Nui, you miss out on the song (seriously, was it just the struggling Steam port, or does “Before my body is dry” really not play during the fight?), and most importantly, the emotion I get from the cutscene is largely lost.

Don’t get me wrong—skipping a repetitive scene is appreciated. But at the same time, the omission makes me long for a single story mode. Players could have fought Nui with “Before my body is dry” playing and watched the Satsuki-story cutscene upon victory. That bit of “Satsuki’s” story already focuses so much on Ryuko that in some ways, it honestly feels more “Ryuko” than Ryuko’s story! Why not just have a unified story mode?

Ryuko’s episodes shine when they significantly differ from what players already witnessed in Satsuki’s campaign. The very beginning of episode 5 is charming because seeing Ryuko just wanting to smash things is legitimately amusing.

Ryuko: Oh! So, I just gotta smack ‘em all in the head.

But this could have easily fit into a single story that switched perspectives. And in fact, moving into episode 6...

Episode 6

It’s almost humorous that Satsuki’s story has purposeful omissions to “justify” the existence of Ryuko’s campaign. I am astounded at how Mako literally does not exist in the Satsuki equivalent of Ryuko’s sixth episode:

Seriously, what? This reminds me of Kingdom Hearts jokes about how it’s rude of Disney movies to totally edit out Sora, Donald, and Goofy.

But jokes aside, the Kingdom Hearts comparison actually has some real weight in regards to IF. In Kingdom Hearts, the Disney worlds are—at least, in my opinion—the most fun and engaging when they do more than simply rehash the films they’re based on with Sora, Donald, and Goofy added. In the same way, Ryuko’s campaign in IF is the most fun and engaging when it does more than simply rehash Satsuki’s campaign with Mako added.

And why was Mako even literally edited out of Satsuki’s cutscenes in the first place? It’s really a bigger discussion, but this choice only adds to my frustrations with how Kill la Kill handles Mako’s character. I’ve already written about my beef with the anime in that regard, but IF is even worse. Mako’s so inconsequential to the story (at least thus far) that she can be totally cut out and have absolutely nothing change. For goodness’ sake, she sleeps for a good chunk of her screentime!

Which... is actually an issue I have with the Grand Summoners crossover game, too....

Ryuko: She’s [Mako’s] already asleep!

But in any case, Mako’s presence in the IF story seems to be purely because she’s a popular character. It’s disappointing to me that Kazuki Nakashima couldn’t find more things for her to do.

And it’s sad that she’s literally edited out of Satsuki’s scenes. I really cannot get over that. What the what.

More to the actual content of Ryuko’s sixth episode, the first part is just old hash browns (plus Mako), but the second part is much more intriguing. I find it curious that Senketsu knows right away what the Primordial Life Fiber is, but Ryuko doesn’t. Does he have a connection with it that Ryuko lacks because her Life Fibers haven’t been awoken yet?

Senketsu: That... is what’s known as the Primordial Life Fiber.

Also, same, Mako, same. I also call Nui and Ragyo’s Primordial Life Fiber-y attacks in this game “meatballs.”

Mako: Ooooh! It looks like a big ol’ meatball!

I feel like my previous write-ups on IF already express a lot of what I could say regarding this episode, but I will again reiterate that the character interactions are charming. It’s nice to hear Ryuko laugh (even if in a taunting way), and the Elite Four are absolutely adorable.

Ryuko: Ha! Whatever. I’d like to see you try!

Houka: Oh, my God. Do they have to be so loud? Our enemies can hear us from a mile away.

And since this is a video game and all, in regards to the one fight in episode 6, it’s a bit of a pain; battling multiple enemies doesn’t make for the most enjoyable experience because of the camera and inability to properly lock on to targets. But IF excels in the little details. The dialogue when other characters join you for the fight is as amusing as always. 

There really should be subtitles, though. It’s super poor accessibility.

Episode 6 also briefly questions the nature of the world. Earlier episodes of Ryuko’s campaign had Senketsu—and Nui—note that something felt off about time. Here, Senketsu outright says that time in the Fiber Palace is “seems unstable,” and interestingly, the camera focuses on Ryuko when he wonders if it’s the location or “something else” that’s causing the abnormality.

Senketsu: The flow of time here seems unstable. Is this place causing it to happen...? Or... is something else triggering it....

It’s not in this episode, but given that Ragyo later describes Ryuko as “the singularity,” perhaps she is the one messing up the world.

I think Ryuko sums up my thoughts, though.

Ryuko: I don’t get what’s goin’ on.

Of course, probably the most notable aspect of episode 6 is the ending, and while I could see right through what was happening, I have to admit that Ryuko going at Mako with the Scissor Blades is a stellar finish.

Ryuko: I still gotta get revenge for my dad.

Senketsu: What are you doing, Ryuko?!

Episode 7

However...

Ryuko: Oh, blow it out yer ass... Nui Harime!

I got some issues with this.

For those who have been Kill la Kill-ing for as long as I have, you might remember that there was a flood of Mako-is-Nui theories immediately after the show’s finale. Amusingly, character designer Sushio outright denied the idea in a Tweet, and a Studio Trigger panel at Anime Expo 2014 (6th post from the top) also shot the notion down.

aranbeik: is it [the Mako-is-Nui theory] true????

Sushio: It is no relationship at all

But fake Makos actually ain’t absent from Kill la Kill. In the official Drama CDs that came packaged with Japanese releases of the anime, there are two instances of fake Makos. The first happens in CD 1, where Maiko Ogure impersonates Mako for a huge portion of the runtime. The second happens in CD 4, where—“funnily” enough—Nui herself impersonates Mako after Ryuko has her heart brutally ripped out of her chest by her own mother.

And here’s my issue with IF’s portrayal: in both of these Drama CD cases, Ryuko is fooled. Mako isn’t Mako for tons of the first CD, and Ryuko doesn’t notice. And, in the Nui situation, it’s Senketsu who has to tell her that the “Mako” before them is not actually Mako. Which goes completely counter to what IF does!

It’s not that I’m against Ryuko recognizing a fraud, but her inability to in the Drama CDs lends insight into her character that I find fitting. Ryuko fails to identify the fake Makos in the CDs because Ryuko initially closes her heart off to the girl—something she outright admits in episode 22 (and which the English dub makes particularly prominent).

Ryuko: Yeah, you [Mako] too! You’re like the most persistent chick I ever met! You didn’t care if I pushed you away! You kept coming back and coming back like a yo-yo!

However, after ripping Junketsu from her body, Ryuko becomes far more open, and it’d be really powerful for her to correctly identify a fake Mako then. It’d show how their relationship has grown and become stronger.

In IF, Mako and Ryuko have hardly had the development they undergo in the anime, and further, Ryuko’s explanation for how she knew it was Nui doesn’t make a lick of sense!

Nui-Mako: How’d you know it was me?

Ryuko: Easy! After Mako wakes up, she’s always got drool on her face.

As Ryuko seemed to have already deduced that “Mako” was Nui before even looking at her, how in the world does this work?

Episode 7 has more questionable character writing for Ryuko later on, too. I’ve already written at great lengths about how I find her attitude regarding murder totally OOC, but Nui’s death scene also has such a strange line regarding Ryuko’s feelings towards Satsuki:

Nui: Guess who ordered me to take the Rending Scissors from your daddy! Give up? It was Satsuki!

Ryuko: If she did, she musta had a good reason for it.

As sweet as the sentiment is, and as much as I understand that it’s there to point out how not even Nui can tear apart Ryuko and Satsuki’s bond, it leaves me totally baffled. Satsuki must have had a good reason to issue the order that killed her father, and Ryuko’s chill with that? At this point in the story, the kind of unwavering faith in Satsuki that Ryuko displays here is completely unearned. I could see Ryuko at the end of the anime feeling this way, but IF Ryuko? Not at all! She barely knows Satsuki!

But for all my gripes regarding the storyline, we Kill la Kill fans are starving. (Well, at least I am, anyway.) Even if Ryuko’s words to Nui make no sense, it is something I would have liked the anime to explore more, and the character interactions here are undeniably sweet. I love Ryuko and Senketsu’s banter and how it shows how comfortable and in tune with each other they are. I love Ryuko’s silly dialogue to Satsuki and how Satsuki smiles at it, telling us that even the “ice-cold” Student Council President can’t help but get a bit soft at this dorky shounen protagonist.

Ryuko: I hate family drama. But I said I’d save Satsuki, sooo...

Senketsu: I had a feeling you’d say that.

Ryuko: Looks like you’re having a really shitty day, Satsuki!

The battle that finishes up this episode, with “Blumenkranz” playing in the background and the Elite Four and Satsuki joining the fight with cute dialogue, is a joy, too. There are a lot of little details that I really appreciate.

(I also realized this time around that you can stop Ragyo’s Instant Kill and didn’t get obliterated by Shinra-Kouketsu like I did in Satsuki’s story.) 

Ragyo: Your sins shall be purged along with your pathetic body!

Episode 8

But in regards to the plot of IF, Ryuko’s eighth episode finally starts dropping some more answers. As the ending of Satsuki’s story had implied, the world is outright said here to be her dream, created from Junketsu:

Ragyo: Junketsu took your [Satsuki’s] dreams and made them tangible. That is the distorted world we see now.

However, I still can’t say I get it. When Satsuki wakes up at the end of her story, it’s the start of episode 1 of the anime. She hasn’t come into contact with Junketsu yet, so how has this distorted world even been created in the first place? I guess Life Fibers can just mess with time?

I’m also kinda amused that the world is said to be what Satsuki wants to happen, yet she describes it as a “bad dream” when she wakes up.

But the big “new” information is Ragyo’s assertion that Ryuko is “the singularity”:

Ragyo: I knew it. You were the singularity, Ryuko Matoi.

As Ragyo explains, she could have taken over this fake world (and perhaps merged it with the real one, judging by her comment in Satsuki’s story about how such a world “can even be spun into a single yarn with the Primordial Life Fiber”), but Ryuko got in the way:

Ragyo: Since my Life Fibers are much more powerful than Junketsu’s, I could’ve taken this planet over. Then, I could’ve enslaved humanity and begun the process of turning it... into a Cocoon Sphere. Yes, I could’ve. If it wasn’t for your existence, Ryuko Matoi.

Now, there have been hints that something’s up with Ryuko all throughout IF, but I can’t say I really know what to make of it. Senketsu remarks that Ryuko’s oddly strong in the first episode of her campaign, Ragyo adds to this and suggests that Ryuko’s affecting the Primordial Life Fiber in the same episode, and then, there also seems to be the implication that Ryuko is triggering the weird sense of time in her sixth episode. The final episode of Satsuki’s story seems to feature Ryuko absorbing Life Fibers, too.

It makes sense for Ryuko to affect Satsuki’s dream world, of course; Ryuko has Life Fibers in her, and she’s also the sister whom Satsuki is ultimately fighting for. I’ve seen theories that the Primordial Life Fiber takes on the shape of a baby to represent the baby sister Satsuki thought she’d lost (and at least in the English dub, Ryuko does refer to the baby as a “she,” further connecting the baby to the lost sister); so perhaps, even if Satsuki doesn’t recognize her connection to Ryuko, maybe the Life Fibers do. Ryuko has power in the dream world because, in a lot of ways, Ryuko is Satsuki’s dream. Maybe that’s the reason that Satsuki only gets flashes of scenes between her and Ryuko in the anime when the baby connects with her, too.

Who knows? I can only hope that episodes 9 and 10 will clear this story up.

I’ve obviously got a lot of questions, but I know this is basically the end. I’m not sure how much explanation to expect going forward, and I’m still wondering about things that don’t even necessarily (?) have to do with the dream world, too. Like, whatever was the point of that moment with Ragyo and one of Senketsu’s scraps? And what was bothering Shiro?

Shiro: There’s just one thing that bothers me...

I said in the beginning of this tl;dr report that I couldn’t pinpoint a single reason for my inability to write it for eight months. But maybe part of the reason is that it’s kind of nice to not know the ending. As long as I don’t play it, there’s still some official Kill la Kill content that I haven’t experienced yet, and it could be anything.

But at the same time, I don’t know how much longer I can go without seeing Senketsu-Kisaragi, so.

The thing—i.e., this monstrous essay—that was holding me back from playing through to the end is now complete! And I’m ready to finally finish this game.

Here’s to hoping that the finale is satisfying 🤞

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Jimmy

Janis: 💀👑 having a party Jimmy: Where's my handwritten 💌? Jimmy: bit rude Janis: not enough 🩸 Janis: 💔 Janis: [pic of jelly shots and other basic party tings taking up cali's fridge] Jimmy: 🙄 Jimmy: if you ain't fucked with them, I'm dumping you Janis: it's like you don't know me at all 😱😏 Jimmy: Oi, it's a secret, that Janis: not tweeted it yet, we're safe Jimmy: tah, Judy Jimmy: what's the 👗👠 then? Janis: 🤔 Janis: it's either taking their 'style', lack of a better word, and doing it better, 'cos duh Janis: OR doing the anti-them so hard she'll be 😡 the second we walk in Jimmy: so do you want me in 👗👠 or looking like I slept in the park with nowt but a 🔪 and an empty wallet? Janis: both hot 🔥 Janis: probably hates poors slightly more than crossdressers 💙 Jimmy: have I got time to get a vote labour face tattoo? Janis: only if it's misspelled 💘 Jimmy: Duh Jimmy: trying to work out what 🎨 I could get to show I hate lawyers Jimmy: no win no fee finger tats? Janis: 😂 Janis: full of the 🥇💡s today Jimmy: downside being Ian might reckon it's 🥇💡 an' all, I'd have to ❌ 'em out or cover 'em up with something that'll get him fuming before he realises Jimmy: or put the 👗👠 on as well as Janis: that'll do it Janis: dress on a lad is still a dress on a lad, even if it's red Jimmy: getting into a 🥊 with him would only help the cause, nowt more common than a black eye and chipped tooth Janis: not had enough time for my fake pillow baby to be showing, WELL gutted 😭 Jimmy: can make the announcement on the night 🍾 be a lovely surprise for her Janis: godmother, anyone? 🙊 Jimmy: only right after we conceived it in her bunk 💕 Janis: solid HILARIOUS lad speech story, hun 👌 Jimmy: especially when I add in that I ain't sure and it could've been her desk in computer science 😘 Jimmy: oh the #bants Janis: me, tryna remember that time 💭👀 Jimmy: you and sir both Jimmy: draw the line at fake naming it after her though, what's her dad called? Janis: who knows Janis: Mike, John, Peter, Paul etc etc Jimmy: UGH fine we'll call the kid Jeremy Janis: gonna start doing #babytaylor updates around the 🕞 Jimmy: same Janis: graphic details of the abortion, good times, like Jimmy: but the #datenight in hell after is gonna be 🔥 soooooooooo Janis: 💁 #hatersgonnahate #dontmumshameme #howtolosethepregnancypounds Jimmy: 😏 Janis: she lives ages from both of us so where do you wanna meet? Jimmy: middle? Janis: his MIND 🤤 Jimmy: it don't matter to me actually now your ankle's loads better and I ain't gotta carry you the whole way Janis: said as if that were my preference, ever Janis: or that I'm well fat Jimmy: you were warned I'm 👴 and on death's door, mate Jimmy: I've had my 😭 about it but crack on with yours Janis: what else can be said about your stamina at this point, eh Janis: my cross to bear Jimmy: nowt 'cause I can't be all ears for your fake complaints after being deafened by your real praise Janis: if you're so gutted, I can promise you'll never 🔊 it again Jimmy: can you? doubt that Janis: see how easy Jimmy: alright Janis: 👍 Jimmy: come here then Janis: where? Jimmy: where am I round the 🕞 Janis: UGH, don't remind me Janis: my biggest fake complaint 🥺 Jimmy: baby Janis: NEVER see you Jimmy: but I'm ALWAYS 💭💕 about you Janis: that'll be why Mia don't tip 💅 Jimmy: yeah that's TOTALLY the reason Janis: if you're THAT distracted how can you possibly remember how to make a decent latte?! Janis: if you're THAT distracted how can you possibly remember how to make a decent latte?! Jimmy: 1. there's no such thing as a decent latte 2. I could have you up on the counter and still make whatever ☕ dickheads want Janis: 1. okay got me there 2. not gonna have me there 'cos I'm nowhere near town so 💔 Jimmy: like I said ALWAYS 💭💕 Jimmy: and always fucking here 🕞 Janis: you're saying got time for that bus journey but how do I know it'd be worth it? Jimmy: I didn't promise to go mute on you for a start Janis: yeah? Jimmy: got loads to say, me Jimmy: [🔥 sext because why not] Janis: it's like that then Jimmy: it's however you like, you know that Janis: okay Janis: I want to see you Jimmy: okay Jimmy: I want you here Janis: I feel it Jimmy: I can promise you will Janis: you haven't forgotten just how long this bus ride takes, have you? Jimmy: no Janis: so you're being mean to me on purpose Jimmy: you started it by taking the piss out of my stamina Jimmy: this is just me showing you how much I've got Janis: but I'm already so Jimmy: and what I'm sitting here dead unfazed, do you reckon? Janis: I don't Janis: I think about you too, for real Jimmy: do you? Janis: yeah Janis: if I was good with words I could tell you about it but Jimmy: it's alright, you can show me Janis: when I'm with you, yeah Janis: what about all the times I'm not? Jimmy: you're decent enough at leaving reminders, I think I'll live Janis: you might Jimmy: how full's your 🚍 gonna be? Janis: this time? Janis: 👻town Jimmy: nowt to worry about then, is there? Janis: ? Jimmy: a 💣 could go off and who's about to see or hear it Jimmy: just us Janis: and the driver Jimmy: he'll be chatting to his mate or missus like the one before Jimmy: and you're gonna be 🔇 so you said Janis: 🤏 rude I'm now not that distracting at all, apparently but Janis: okay Jimmy: if he's that into it he can be our 3rd Janis: I'd ask but 😶 Jimmy: it'll go without saying, don't worry Janis: go on then Janis: you have to fill in the silence and tell me what you really think about me 💭💕 Jimmy: [a voice memo to make it even more of a #mood and to make me lol cos do you ever do any work boy] Janis: has anyone ever told you your voice isn't a total turn-off Jimmy: it ain't a compliment that usually gets chucked at me Janis: they're stupid then Janis: more than I reckoned Jimmy: don't talk to them, do I? Jimmy: just you Janis: oh yeah, suppose not Janis: count myself 🍀 Jimmy: dunno about that but you're alright to 🗨 to Janis: known worse, like Jimmy: tah very much Janis: you don't like compliments Jimmy: I never said that Jimmy: I don't know how to take 'em Jimmy: same as you Janis: it's when it's Janis: if you just said the same shit everyone says, it wouldn't even register Janis: but you ain't ever that predictable Jimmy: you're not a lass that's gonna get bog standard bollocks out of me Jimmy: 🥇 muse Janis: I can handle that Janis: you're pretty talented Jimmy: if you're the masterpiece, how could I fuck that up? Jimmy: barely have to do owt for it to be art Janis: be surprised how a lad can, 'cept not at all Jimmy: letdowns don't surprise me, whoever they're off 🌧 remember Jimmy: have had and have done loads, it's why the 😒 face fits Janis: you're far from a letdown to me, where it counts, like Janis: have that for free Jimmy: don't count for much when it's been days Jimmy: even Ian can manage to keep a lass about for that long sometimes Jimmy: but alright Janis: well it's all I've got Janis: and as I said, had worse Janis: you're free to disappoint me any time Jimmy: yeah, me an' all, but no need for me to chuck all the comparisons to my shit ex at you and pretend it'll do for a compliment Jimmy: or pretend that I wanna disappoint you Janis: It don't matter, we know it's inevitable but we also know we don't need to think about that right now Jimmy: it matters a bit Janis: not enough that we can do fuck all about it Jimmy: I just Janis: me too Jimmy: it ain't fair that you can 🧠📖 Janis: can't really Janis: could've agreed to anything there but fuck it, why not Jimmy: that's why I like you Janis: obviously Janis: whole plan hinges on it Jimmy: nowt to do with how fit and mysterious you are Janis: 🤏 tah Jimmy: Oi, I've been telling you how fit you are from day one Janis: don't stop Jimmy: not til it actually 💀💀💀s me Jimmy: how ain't there bollocks rumours about you being a model or an actress an' all? Janis: that'd be 😤💚 not 🤤💖 Janis: anyway, the school trip before the last, some scout came up to me and I thought the gals might actually murder her, or drown her with their 😭😭😭😭😭 Jimmy: right, it's different for lasses, so I've heard off you loads of times now Janis: and lads lack the imagination, not the kind of model or actress they're arsed about Jimmy: and that were why you didn't wanna do it then? Janis: didn't really have a chance, Lucas told her it was highly inappropriate to approach a child on a school trip, code for 'hands-off she's mine' 🙄 Jimmy: I get it, you can only find out who people are when I read their tits and tell you Janis: obviously Janis: got the card if you really wanna kickstart your career Jimmy: I just dunno why you don't, it'd be 💰💰 and a 💀👑 fuck you Janis: yeah but it's complicated Jimmy: which bit? the walk or the pout? Janis: very funny, dickhead Janis: 🥇 muse, so I've been told Jimmy: exactly Jimmy: why wouldn't you wanna get the fuck out of here? Janis: there's no guarantee that would happen Janis: might never get booked, or whatever the fuck they call it Jimmy: alright, you're scared of looking a twat Jimmy: but you're never getting booked if your name ain't down Jimmy: don't tell anyone you 🖋🩸 if nowt happens Janis: we've got well distracted from the point here anyway Jimmy: the new point is, stop being a selfish prick and think how 🥇 it'd make me look to have a model girlfriend, tah very much Janis: 🙄😏 you're the fucking worst Jimmy: kindly crack on 'cause I ain't gonna be about forever, like Janis: 👴 Jimmy: ✈👋 or ⚰🌹 either'll do Janis: know which one you meant Jimmy: it weren't me saying you can't 🧠📖 Janis: no brain to pick, you 💘 Jimmy: bit rude Jimmy: yeah alright, that lass who tried to snatch you off the school trip'd know more than me but I still reckon you'd be good Janis: shh Jimmy: 🤐 Jimmy: meant to be you on mute though Janis: my point about the point exactly Janis: make it hard for me to speak in a fun way, dickhead Jimmy: [giving her pics because she gave him that glorious dressing room selfie and we know he looks good whenever even when he's supposed to be working lol] Janis: Jesus, boy Janis: how do you just look like that Jimmy: #notamodelbutmyfakegirfriendis Janis: definitely not doing it so you have a 🔥 # Jimmy: but LITERALLY what other reason is there???!! 😱😱 #s are EVERYTHING babe Janis: I know, hardest decision I've ever had to make Jimmy: I'm leaving now, I just think Jimmy: you're so Jimmy: *it Janis: I reckon you are too Janis: like Janis: normal lads don't look like you do Jimmy: I can't fake that hard it being a northern thing Jimmy: 💔 if that means my parents weren't shit at everything Janis: same but that ain't news to me Janis: people LOVE being vocal about how fit my mum is Jimmy: bit rude of everyone to fake Grace being your twin when she's really adopted 🎻 Janis: she looks like my dad's mum and she's devastated, is a gutting comparison however you slice it Jimmy: I should've done more 🎻🎻 Jimmy: I get it, I look like Ian so every other dickhead reckons Janis: 🤏 rude of you to say he weren't fit but I'll allow it Jimmy: 🤏💔 he's my biological father 🤞 the other two can still cut and run Janis: seen your socials that ain't got me in, the kid looks like a small clone of you so 🌧 Jimmy: 💰 on my sister then Janis: usually the middle child Jimmy: she's got his 😡 and it can't be nurture as he don't fucking do none so Jimmy: that's all of us fucked Janis: shit, ain't it Janis: couple my sisters escaped having the same dad but my ma's got terrible taste so theirs weren't no better 💔 Jimmy: how many do you have? Janis: 4 sisters and a brother Jimmy: bet he were 💔 growing up Janis: yeah we made him well gay Jimmy: don't @iantaylor8 Janis: he ain't about to gay bash so it's alright Janis: about to have a gaybie though so pop off on that one Jimmy: he'd be well chuffed to hear he can still have grandkids to bully even though he reckons we're all gay Janis: weird flex on your nature and nurture there, mate Jimmy: duh it's MY fault not his Jimmy: couldn't keep my ex from sleeping with half the north 'cause I obvs weren't and turned them onto a gay lifestyle while I wasn't at it 🙄 Jimmy: #myinfluence Janis: Is Bill your dad? Janis: the drama, the top class storytelling 👌👏 Jimmy: 🤞 you've still got that quill you borrowed Janis: if you fancy it, I'll come about and loudly let him know how gay you ain't Jimmy: he'd have to be about for that plan to work Jimmy: if we held our breath we wouldn't need the 💀💀💀 pact Janis: probably can't turn up at his workplace, yeah, bit weird Jimmy: ☕ delivery Jimmy: just brought my muse so I can do top latte art Janis: unrelated but where is the nearest storage cupboard, tah Jimmy: nowt to see here but everything to hear soz Jimmy: you'd have to break your vow of silence any road, can't have that Janis: not a nun, not an eternal vow Janis: just 'til you admit you like hearing it Jimmy: don't need to tell me on either count Jimmy: and I never denied that I like hearing you Janis: you were taking the piss Janis: so now you're gonna have to be well nice before I even consider it Janis: which is very 💔 for me 'cos I like making noise for you Jimmy: I've been SO nice since Janis: could you be nicer? 🤔 Jimmy: you tell me Jimmy: how can I? Janis: tell me what we're going to do at this party Jimmy: whose house is it at? Janis: #2 Jimmy: we'll find her fave bathroom then, she's bound to spend more time there than owt else Jimmy: ruin it for her Janis: anything that keeps her off the 🚽 is a 🏆 for us Jimmy: we can work out where her 🛏 is after Janis: probably four-poster Jimmy: probably be pretty hard to break Jimmy: but I'm up for the challenge if you are Janis: of course Janis: who am I? Jimmy: you're Jimmy: 🥇 Janis: you're fucking Janis: so good Jimmy: you Janis: you you you Jimmy: if it's owt to do with me it'll be 'cause you've inspired me Janis: I'll take that Jimmy: do Jimmy: it's right Janis: I'm already bored of being on this bus Jimmy: it takes the piss but I need to see you Janis: I want it too Janis: takes the piss I live in the middle of nowhere Jimmy: I'll move you in when Jeremy's born, you're alright Janis: #1 dad Janis: get your own mug Jimmy: *🏆 Janis: bit demanding, babe Jimmy: what kind of dad can I be if I don't have nowt to put my 🥃 in? Jimmy: size matters, babe Janis: 😏 Janis: join you once he thing is out Janis: only 🍷🍷 Jimmy: @ Helena for 💊 Jimmy: your back will be killing you Janis: if he's got a head size of yours, I'll 💀💀💀 Jimmy: I'll 🔪 it out for you, what could be more #goals? Janis: basically a doctor 😍 Jimmy: wasted on just giving 🧽 baths, me Janis: not quite bubbles and 🍾 but Jimmy: when we get to the party, you can have that Janis: we can? Jimmy: if you want Janis: what do you want? Jimmy: What kind of question is that? Janis: one you never answer Jimmy: one you know the answer to Janis: no Jimmy: yeah Janis: 😡 Jimmy: I want you, dickhead Jimmy: I've said it before Janis: not a 🚨⛓ to wanna hear it Jimmy: 💔 love a crime, keeps me in a job Janis: I'll commit another, hang on Jimmy: 😍 Janis: pretty sure how you're tryna make me feel in public is illegal Jimmy: 🚔'd quicker than the 🚍 Jimmy: and hang on, isn't it working? Janis: if only Janis: it's not not working, but it'd work better if you were here Jimmy: brb just gotta change uniforms 👮🚔🚨 Jimmy: be with you in a sec Janis: love a chase scene Jimmy: 💕 Janis: reckon this driver is a new boy too Janis: going well slow Jimmy: Oi don't lump me in with him Janis: you can still be 🍦 of the month, it's okay Jimmy: is it? first my stamina gets slagged off now it's my tempo Jimmy: gonna need a complaints 🗑 if you keep on Janis: babe Jimmy: soz I didn't ask you to fake 👰💍🤵 or 🤰 on day one, like Jimmy: dead slow, me 👻💔 Janis: like, do you even fake like me, OMG Jimmy: busted Jimmy: reckon you're a bit of a dickhead tbh Janis: 😱😱😱 Janis: brb, throwing myself under this bus Janis: probably going too slow to kill me, THANKS Jimmy: see, what's to like, can't even stick to the plan, you Janis: nu-uh Janis: 'cos I'm NOT dying, but you'll show and think I have and go and off yourself Jimmy: 🤏 Janis: don't you 🤏 at me Janis: cheek Jimmy: keeping 🔇 is one thing but denying you're dying right now is Jimmy: I know you are Jimmy: me an' all Janis: it's very inconvenient Janis: wanting you this much Jimmy: weren't part of the plan Janis: exactly Jimmy: but Janis: too late to stop ourselves now Jimmy: not if you want to Janis: I don't Janis: you know that Jimmy: Alright Janis: it is alright, ain't it Jimmy: with me Janis: you're hot, I'm hot, why wouldn't we Jimmy: I'm not gonna give you a list of why it's a 🥉💡 to do this Janis: we'll survive Jimmy: I don't care if I don't Jimmy: 💀💀💀 me Janis: hot Jimmy: I am, you are, you just said Janis: but seriously Janis: you are so Jimmy: I get it, you're taking 💀💀💀 me seriously an' all Jimmy: right now Janis: you have no idea Janis: if I was even as half as good with words Janis: you might feel a fraction of how I'm feeling Jimmy: I do though, you're doing a decent job of telling me Jimmy: and making me feel like I Jimmy: could just Janis: just Jimmy: 💀💀💀 here in front of everyone Janis: oh Jimmy: inconvenient, I think that were what you said Janis: on the counter, that's what you said Janis: what I'm 💭 Jimmy: I'm not closing up but when I am next Janis: promise Jimmy: are you asking me if I do or telling me you do? Janis: asking you to Jimmy: I wouldn't have said it else Jimmy: but okay Janis: your fake manager better not show up Jimmy: he gets us to so he don't have to Jimmy: 👻🥊 Janis: just saying, some prior warning if you wanna third Janis: no 💌 for you Jimmy: I'm alright with leaving the rest of the dickheads out Janis: good to know Janis: 'cos I don't really rate anyone else right now so Jimmy: I've never rated anyone 🥇 as you Janis: you don't need to chat me up Janis: I'm there already Jimmy: it's just a bit of honesty Jimmy: nowt to worry about Janis: you mean it? Jimmy: Why would I have bothered to say it if it weren't? Janis: I dunno Jimmy: the answer is that I wouldn't Janis: alright, I believe you Jimmy: 👍 Janis: me too Jimmy: ? Janis: I ain't rated anyone else this hard either Jimmy: it's the accent Janis: maybe Jimmy: when you're going all about modelling you'll hear some right ones Janis: obvs Janis: let you know your final ranking then, like Jimmy: Tah Janis: all the male models will be gay Jimmy: chuck them my number Jimmy: Ian will be well chuffed Janis: can't have that Jimmy: Oi, just 'cause you're the first I've fake dated no need to make sure you're the only Janis: you wanna real date them, don't lie Janis: make you look well 🥇 Jimmy: it weren't enough for you to make your brother gay, I'm next now Janis: yeah, my agenda Janis: if you spread that around, I'll 🥊 you Jimmy: UGH fine, I'll delete the tweet Janis: dick Janis: 😏 Jimmy: 😘 Janis: how old was you, when you got with your ex Jimmy: why? Jimmy: if you're undercover 👮 an' all, I might believe we're #fated Janis: 💔 now I'm #gutted Janis: dunno, just asking Jimmy: 🎻🎻😭 dunno what we're pissing about at if we're not 🖋 in the 💫 Janis: I'll turn 'round, you're right Janis: been fun Jimmy: 👋 Jimmy: good luck getting that pout and walk sorted out Janis: good luck getting a new muse Jimmy: probably just give up 🎨 nbd Janis: yeah right Janis: it's your 💘 and life Jimmy: don't sound like me, that Janis: come be my personal 📸 and I'll think about it Jimmy: no expert but I don't reckon that's how it works Janis: then I don't wanna Jimmy: you don't need me to hold your hand Jimmy: 🏆💪 you Janis: don't like having my photo taken Jimmy: fake it then Jimmy: you've had loads of practice Janis: true Jimmy: I'll take more, you won't give a shit about 📸 by the time I've been dumped Janis: like it when you do Janis: maybe it's your process Jimmy: I'm sure any photographer'd be chuffed to have a crack at doing the same for you Jimmy: won't be as fit and mysterious as me but Jimmy: you'll live Janis: 🙌 Jimmy: 🥇💡 to keep the pull out and pray method in mind, take a bit of the homeland with you Janis: ha ha ha Janis: shut up now Jimmy: not having my fake baby raised by other photographers Janis: doubt I fancy explaining that sentence to anyone else Jimmy: you don't fancy it, nowt of Jimmy: so alright, I'll leave it out Jimmy: 🤐 Janis: it's all bullshit Janis: nothing real about it Jimmy: the 💰💰 is Jimmy: and ✈🌏 Janis: I'm not a Hadid Jimmy: I dunno who that is Janis: it'd be less 🤩 and more, local ads and old lady catalogs Jimmy: and what? Janis: ❌💰💰✈🌏 Janis: ✔ 🚌🚍 Jimmy: ✔🐕🏃 then Janis: so soz it ain't as glamorous Jimmy: I doubt standing about in 👙👗👠 waiting for 📸 is Janis: yeah Janis: stupid Jimmy: like the lasses who'd be 😤💚 or 😭💔 Janis: literal Janis: must not know you can't ask the photographer to facetune you just how you like Janis: the breakdowns they'd have with the proofs would be worth it Jimmy: the Q&A they'd die for but'll never get 'cause you're out Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Janis: hmm Janis: could fake that Jimmy: a career? yeah works for Mia's dad Janis: 😂 Janis: my 🥇 inspo forever Jimmy: obvs Janis: sorted then Jimmy: 👍 Janis: be selling skinny tea on the socials in no time Jimmy: I'm not even gonna ask what the fuck that is Janis: laxatives Janis: 😋 Jimmy: 💀👑 would have to be fake nice to you for the discount Jimmy: not gonna put them on daddy's 💳 Janis: he's all about triggering that gag reflex Jimmy: my 🥇 inspo forever Janis: 😏 Janis: nice Jimmy: I am yeah Jimmy: SUCH a good lad Janis: not gonna disagree Jimmy: but you LOVE disagreeing with me, Judith Janis: maybe I LOVE making you feel like a lad more Jimmy: there's nowt you 💕 more than a challenge, I get it Janis: 'course Janis: far as you know Jimmy: #thickandnorthern Janis: #fitandmysterious Jimmy: don't remind me Janis: what else do you have to think about that's more fun than me? Jimmy: tip jar Janis: 💔😭 damn, can't compete Jimmy: gonna fare piss poor in this fake divorce now you've ❌💰💰✈🌏 Jimmy: gotta do something Janis: never would've got a penny out of me Janis: not a mug Jimmy: with Mia's dad having to choose sides it'll be 💔😭 all round Janis: how it's meant to be, isn't it Janis: get the best #drama out of the break-up Janis: Bill'll be happy, at least Jimmy: he'll be LIVING Jimmy: #ghostbants Janis: wow Janis: 🤓 Jimmy: am I ready to be a dad or what? Janis: you've got the jokes and the fashion, babe Jimmy: working on the body obvs 🍻🥔🥧 Janis: can't wait to be disgusted by you 💘 Jimmy: helping you fake your morning sickness is just the kind of lad I am Janis: don't need 💀👑 tips Jimmy: 💔😭🎻 for her Janis: good thing she's got the gals to look up to her Janis: not #2 she's clearly better at it, but the other ones Jimmy: I hope she goes live the day she does her in for surpassing her at starvation Jimmy: always need 💀💀💀 tips Jimmy: 🤞🥇💡 Janis: not gonna be as good as ours Jimmy: no need for us to make it look like an accident Jimmy: I know what I want Jimmy: not a tease like those pair Janis: if you were gonna lead me on that much Jimmy: you'd actually have to fake it Jimmy: can't have that Janis: shut up Janis: I'm 🥇 Jimmy: but still ain't been scouted as an actress have you, mate? Jimmy: says it all Janis: 'cos no one knows I'm in character Janis: called method acting, look it up dickhead Jimmy: you know I can't read Jimmy: bit bloody insensitive that you keep bringing it up Janis: 💁 Jimmy: be about right Janis: you started it Jimmy: bollocks Janis: you did too Jimmy: I never Janis: 😒 Jimmy: Oi don't be copying me Jimmy: [a 😒 selfie cos he's a nerd] Janis: oi yourself when you know that's a #kinkunlocked Janis: very rude Jimmy: or very nice Janis: you reckon? Jimmy: you don't? Jimmy: could just leave you with your 💭 Janis: subtle hint Jimmy: I know 🏆 Janis: dunno how good a photo you reckon I can take on this bus but Janis: challenge accepted Jimmy: you said you were 🥇 Janis: not at Jimmy: I rate you Janis: only 'cos I know you've got no mates to send 'em to Jimmy: bit rude Jimmy: that why you're always trying to set me up on playdates? Janis: 1. when? 2. 'cos I want any nudes I do to get better views? yeah, obvs Jimmy: any teacher or coworker for a start Janis: that's you, you're insatiable Jimmy: tweet that and keep your nudes out of it Janis: blame me for your 😍 Janis: psh Jimmy: it's your fault Janis: nah Jimmy: yeah Janis: shh Jimmy: I can't 🔊 me Janis: I can Janis: call it your literary voice Jimmy: I still don't believe you can Janis: why not? Jimmy: experience Janis: what does that mean Jimmy: it means you never 🤐 Janis: 😑 Jimmy: 😏 Janis: you're a twat Jimmy: yeah Janis: literally not talking to you ever again Jimmy: sounds fake that does Janis: you'll see Jimmy: I don't want to Janis: well Jimmy: well you're still 🗨 Janis: alright Jimmy: 👍 Janis: bye Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: yeah, party Jimmy: funny Janis: is it? Jimmy: what are you gonna do, get straight back on that 🚍 when you come off? Janis: I've got shit I can do, tah for the concern Jimmy: alright Janis: bit of a pisstake, actually Jimmy: what? Janis: you've dragged me out Jimmy: done nowt of the sort Janis: yes you have Jimmy: never made you do owt, real or fake Janis: you know what I mean Jimmy: I know you're being a dickhead Janis: then stop replying if that's what you reckon Jimmy: it ain't me who don't wanna talk Jimmy: that's your party trick Janis: it's me who talks too much Janis: can't have it both ways Jimmy: I didn't say I wanted it a different way Janis: stop being a headfuck Jimmy: stop taking what I say wrong Janis: if I could, I would Jimmy: why can't you? Janis: it's me, not you Janis: you just said it Jimmy: no need to make it sound like the start of a breakup Janis: how would you like me to say it Jimmy: just listen to me, how about that? Jimmy: I like how much you talk Jimmy: I like talking to you Janis: but then I don't know what to say back Janis: it's compliments Jimmy: I don't mind not having any back Jimmy: silence is alright an' all as long as it's not a 💔 one Janis: it's not fair Janis: you should feel uncomfortable and all, like Jimmy: I don't feel anything 👻 perks Janis: yeah Jimmy: I'll stop if it makes you feel better Jimmy: signing only or something Janis: I don't feel anything either, that's what you don't get Jimmy: fuming is a feeling, girl Janis: so's 😒 Janis: but we both know, not really Jimmy: we both know that's just my face Janis: sure Jimmy: go on Janis: you clearly feel shit Janis: and it ain't just me that don't like talking about it, that's as obvious Jimmy: What are you the 💕😭😒 👮? Janis: 🙄 just don't chat shit about my party trick when you're doing the same Jimmy: how am I? Jimmy: I've said loads to you Janis: I've said shit to you too Janis: I'm talking about now Jimmy: what about now? Janis: you're being weird Jimmy: what does that mean? Janis: dunno Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: let's leave it Jimmy: 👌 Janis: I dunno about any of this, alright Jimmy: and I do? Janis: more than me Jimmy: how'd you work that out? Janis: you've done it before Jimmy: no I've not Janis: real is more of a challenge, if anything, not less, so Jimmy: weren't disputing that Janis: so you have Jimmy: no I've not Jimmy: it weren't the same Janis: obviously not Janis: not at the core Janis: but there's still shit you can use Jimmy: oh yeah, hang on I'll crack on and❌ out whatever I can't then it'll be piss easy Janis: I'm not saying that it weren't real with your ex, you don't need to get defensive Jimmy: you're being a massive twat Janis: not trying to Jimmy: leave it, like you said Janis: alright then Jimmy: 👍 Janis: 👍 Jimmy: Why would you say that? Janis: what part? Jimmy: that there's shit I can use Janis: not like a bad thing Janis: just pointing out it's harder for me Jimmy: how isn't it a bad thing to reckon I can just swap out one lass for another? Janis: if this was real, maybe Janis: just meant experience, like Jimmy: right Janis: I didn't mean it as a diss Jimmy: I'll dry my eyes then, tah for clearing that up Janis: yeah, yeah 😏 Jimmy: ✔ Janis: harsh Jimmy: if this were real, might be Janis: okay Janis: got it Jimmy: I don't reckon you do Janis: you never do Jimmy: alright, it's my fault Jimmy: that sounds real enough Janis: yeah, exactly what I was after Janis: cheers and tah Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: what do you want? Janis: don't you know that and all Jimmy: just asking for the fun of it, me Janis: letdown all 'round then Jimmy: it's been said Janis: not by me Jimmy: ⬆ there Janis: that was the first time Janis: 😭 accordingly Jimmy: I will do Janis: hmm Janis: wasn't very believable tbh babe Jimmy: I'll send you the video when I'm on my next break Janis: cool Jimmy: I'll try and look it 💔😎🚬 Janis: it's your whole brand so Jimmy: won't have to try very hard then Janis: 🙌 Jimmy: 🎬🏆🥇 Janis: post you your oscar Jimmy: bring it to the party Jimmy: save yourself the postage Janis: oh yeah Janis: 👍 one Jimmy: full of top quality 💡 me Janis: reason I keep you about Jimmy: duh Jimmy: see you there then Janis: alright Janis: in a bit Jimmy: 😘 Janis: [better skip to this party when you don't come around gal] Jimmy: [such fun] Jimmy: Oi, where am I headed? Jimmy: [after a bit when she has not replied] Jimmy: very helpful, you Jimmy: are we going to this party or what, dickhead? Jimmy: [after another bit] Jimmy: no? alright then Janis: [I'm thinking this is hours later, so the party is over] Janis: had to go somewhere Janis: say I'm at yours if anyone gives a shit Jimmy: tah for telling me when I could have done something to keep us #goals Jimmy: oh hang on, nah, you didn't Janis: sorry Janis: I'm busy Jimmy: me an' all Jimmy: literally always Janis: this is different Jimmy: I don't care Jimmy: I didn't ask Jimmy: it's nowt to do with me, what's to do with me is that you didn't bother to tell me you weren't coming Janis: alright Janis: sorry again Jimmy: now you need me to cover for you, yeah Janis: don't if you can't be bothered Jimmy: I do what I say I'm gonna do Jimmy: you can piss off Janis: yeah well you ain't promised so do what you want Jimmy: I don't need to, it ain't that #deep Jimmy: we have a deal and I pull my weight with it Janis: I'm not wasting battery saying it again Jimmy: you heard me say piss off then Jimmy: on you go Janis: bye, Jimmy Jimmy: 👋 Janis: [that's that on that]