#i probably have an iron deficiency or something

[twig-gy]

i headcanon that heart just puts random things in his mouth. like any small object. type of guy to put pennies in his mouth and then, after 5 seconds pass, realize that’s gross actually

and mind is like “heart don’t do that you’ll get like. some disease somehow” but heart likes the sensation of the metal clanking around he likes the taste okay is it really that bad

also heart is the type of guy to eat ice but then in 5 seconds complain his teeth hurt, mind is the type of guy to eat ice and when heart complains about how loud it is obnoxiously crunch louder, and soul is the type of guy to continue eating ice even though it tastes like there’s blood in his mouth

[mrfoox]

I should probably see a doctor about how I am only awake like 6 hours per day... But uh

[thepastramicheesemonster]

.

[who-is-there]

I just started watching Dimension 20’s Fantasy high, halfway through sophomore year, and I do want a fic where people realise just how used to being part of a group the bad kids are. For example-

-I fully believe every single one of them is used to Riz climbing them so he can see better. It’s usually Gorgug, but it’s happened to all of them at some point. They might hold out their arm for him to jump onto a counter, or so he can pin a clue to his board. Before they all sit at a table, at least one of them makes sure their 4’4 friend can jump onto the table.

-Every single one of them has also caught Adaine after she had a vision. Sometimes she can just shake them off, but the big ones make her falter in what she’s doing, which can be dangerous. It happened once in a fight, and now the people standing closest to her are always ready.

-Fabian doesn’t really recognise he has a blind spot with his eye injury, because the others immediately clocked it. But this also means they walk in between him and the road, in case some idiot mounts the curb. They keep an eye on anything to his right, shifting drinks and pushing chairs if they can tell his depth perception is a little off.

-Fig usually stands in the middle of the group to intimidate people into not messing with them, so it’s sort of become habit to just crowd around her. After the battle, if no one’s seriously hurt or anything, everyone just wanders over to Fig. At this point, Fig is always the first one to yell out after a fight, just so they can regroup.

-Gorgug is the go-to for lap-sits, leaning, anything to do with being physically supported by another persons body. His hoodie is soft, and his headphones are loud enough that you can kind of hear it if you’re leaning on him. His parents weren’t great with nonchalant physical contact, in case he was already upset, so he takes great joy in his friends not being scared to hug him for fun.

-Kristin has left her staff at every single house she could with the bad kids. She leaves her bag in classrooms, the library, the cafeteria. Whenever the group leave somewhere, they do a full scan, because Kristin has probably left something and they grab it for her. No one has any clue who her bag actually belongs to, because all of the bad kids have been seen carrying it around school several times.

The school at large know who the bad kids are, and the town recognise them, but they still don’t know why all of them double check a room before leaving, or collectively carry a small stool around with them. One student with a fantasy iron deficiency faints in class and Kristin catches her before she hits the ground. Once, Fig isn’t in school for a day and all the bad kids have this restless energy about them. It is not uncommon to see them on the field during lunch, curled up in a pile on Gorgug. One guy tries to surprise Fabian from the right and gets body checked by Adaine before it even registers.

It’s sort of uncomfortable for everyone to see any of them without the others, because it means a) the rest of them committed a crime, b) the rest of them are committing a crime, or c) the rest of them are about to run in and start planning to commit a crime. And no one wants to lose their plausible deniability here.

[awkward-walking-potato]

can i request for Logan howlett x reader who suffers from iron deficiency like one day reader just faint and it took some time for logan to notice makes him very panicked so since then he started putting more attention to you like reminding you to eat healthy stuffs or something like that it's totally up to you!! please and thank youu

The sun streamed through the large windows of the classroom, casting warm golden rays across the desks. The students were diligently working on their assignments, a mix of concentration and the occasional burst of energy that came with being mutants. You, their teacher, were making rounds, offering guidance and support where needed. Today, though, something felt off.

You’d been feeling more tired than usual, and the nagging dizziness that had been plaguing you for days now seemed to have reached its peak. As you leaned over to help a student with their history project, the world started to spin. You tried to steady yourself, gripping the edge of the desk, but it was no use.

“Miss? Are you okay?” one of the students asked, their voice distant and fuzzy.

You opened your mouth to respond, but before you could, your vision blurred, and everything went black.

The next thing you knew, you were lying on something soft—probably the infirmary bed. You could hear murmurs of concern from the students around you. Someone was trying to get them to leave, but their worried voices persisted.

"Move aside, bub. Let her breathe."

That voice. Deep, gravelly, and unmistakable. It cut through the fog in your mind like a knife, and for a moment, the darkness receded.

You blinked your eyes open, finding yourself staring into the intense gaze of Logan Howlett. He was kneeling beside the bed, his usual scowl softened just a bit, showing an expression of concern. The students had been ushered out, likely by Logan himself.

"You alright?" he asked, his voice gruff but tinged with worry.

You nodded weakly, trying to push yourself up, but Logan gently but firmly pressed you back down.

"Take it easy," he said. "You fainted. The kid ran to get me faster than I could blink."

"Thanks," you muttered, feeling embarrassed. "I didn’t mean to make such a scene."

He shrugged, as if fainting in the middle of class was no big deal. "Don't worry about it. You’re gonna be alright. Hank said it’s iron deficiency. You been skippin' meals or somethin'?"

You shook your head. "No, I’ve been eating, just… maybe not enough iron, I guess."

Logan grunted, clearly displeased. "That stops now. You need to take care of yourself, or you’re gonna be no good to those kids—or yourself."

You nodded again, grateful for his concern, but also a bit surprised. Logan wasn’t known for being particularly nurturing, but there was something about his protective nature that made you feel safe, even in your weakened state.

The next day, you were back on your feet and determined to return to the classroom. When you walked in, though, you were greeted by an unexpected sight. Sitting on your desk was a smoothie, bright green and freshly blended. A small note was attached, written in Logan’s unmistakable scrawl:

Drink this. It's got spinach and stuff. - L

You smiled, feeling a warmth in your chest that had nothing to do with the smoothie. You took a sip, surprised to find that it was actually pretty good. Your students filed in, and as the class went on, you found yourself with a bit more energy, the dizziness held at bay by the thoughtful gesture.

From that day forward, Logan kept surprising you. Some days it was a smoothie, other days it was a carefully prepared meal left in your classroom during lunch breaks. He never made a big deal about it, always leaving the food with a gruff note or a simple nod in your direction when he passed by.

It became a routine, one that you grew to rely on and look forward to. You knew Logan was looking out for you in his own way, and it meant more than you could express.

One afternoon, you decided to catch him in the act. You waited in your classroom, pretending to be engrossed in grading papers, but keeping an eye on the door. Sure enough, Logan slipped in quietly, a smoothie in hand.

“Caught you,” you teased, looking up at him with a smile.

Logan huffed, his signature scowl back in place. “Just making sure you don’t pass out on the kids again.”

“Thank you, Logan. Really. You didn’t have to do all this.”

He shrugged, looking a bit uncomfortable with the gratitude. “Ain’t no big deal. Just… take care of yourself, alright? We need you around here.”

Your heart swelled at his words, and you couldn’t help the smile that spread across your face. “I will. And I appreciate you making sure of that.”

Logan grunted, trying to hide the fact that he was pleased. “Good. Now drink that smoothie before it melts.”

You laughed softly and took a sip, the familiar blend of spinach, banana, and something sweet filling your senses. Logan gave you one last nod before heading out, but not before you caught the hint of a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth.

As the days went on, Logan continued his quiet care, and you found yourself growing stronger, both physically and in your feelings for him. What started as concern had blossomed into something deeper—a bond forged not only from his protectiveness but from the understanding and respect you shared.

It wasn’t long before the other teachers started to notice the change in you, and in Logan, too. There were knowing looks exchanged in the hallways, but neither of you paid them any mind. This was your routine, your connection, and it worked for the both of you.

And as long as Logan kept bringing you those smoothies, you knew everything was going to be just fine.

[weepingflowerbonkcop]

First Post and I'm stuck on the idea of being isekaid into LU with your best friend. Here's of my thoughts about the shenanigans. -

Legend: Why are we bringing them along? *pointing towards the two humans fighting each other*

Friend: WHY WON'T YOU LET ME KISS YOU?! IM YOUR BEST FRIEND I HAVE PRIVILEGES?!

Y/N: I'D RATHER DRINK AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF HAND SANITISER BEFORE YOU LAY YOUR LIPS ON ME!

Time: ...

Y/N: *pointing at Legend* He looks like he bites.

Twilight: He probably does.

Hyrule: He does.

Warriors: I was bit.

Sky: I witnessed it.

Legend: What is wrong with her?

Sky: What do you mean?

Legend: I told her a story about fighting a boboklin and she replied by saying, "dead-ass." What does that even mean?

Hyrule: I got a hug from her after healing her.

Twilight: I got kisses from her as Wolfie.

Warriors: I got praised by her for my strength.

Wind: I get all her attention!

Legend: I got asked why my hair is pink.

Legend: You're so useless! You can't fight! Can't heal! God, why are you so useless to the group?

Y/N: First of all, I won't be sassed by man wearing a skirt. Go frolic in a field of daisies if you're so upset.

Four: I can't believe that the Minnish numbers are dwindling in the future! Just look at them! *holds up hands cupped*

Y/N: *not seeing anything in his hands* Okay sweetie, I think that's enough for today. Let's go take a nap, okay? *concerned*

Twilight: On the ranch I had to wrestle some Ordon Goats whenever they go on rampages.

Y/N: I believe that, you're built like a shit brick house. You don't just get that figure by sitting and doing nothing.

Y/N: You ever wonder if the wind is trying to tell us something, but we just forgot how to listen to it?

Time: I just want you to stop saying weird shit.

Wind: *slightly panicked at the thought*

Four: How do you keep on doing this?!

Wild: *broke another sword* I don't know what happened to it...

Y/N: ....

*Flashback*

Y/N: You think that you could cut a bolder in half by trying some breathing technique?

Wild: I have no idea what you're talking about, but I'm invested.

Y/N: Oh yeah. I have like Iron deficiency and so sometimes when I stand up to fast I get flashbanged. I'm also prone to blackouts as well.

Hyrule: *concerned noises*

Four: Remind me to keep an eye on you.

Friend: I wonder how humans taste like?

Y/N: Research has shown that most of the food that we eat contain human DNA. So just think about how chicken burgers tastes like from McDonalds.

Friend: So like chicken then?

Y/N: Pretty much.

Twilight: *overheard their conversation* WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?!

*Four and Time looking at Y/N and Friend*

Four: Have you ever noticed how they don't talk to each other. They just pull faces and make noises.

Time: Maybe it's a human thing?

Friend: *pulling a 'did-you-hear-that-shit' face*

Y/N: *pulling a 'giiirl-I-know-he-didn't' face*

Legend: *secretly understanding and nodding along*

Time: We are the Hero's of Hyrule! We don't show vulnerability.

Y/N: You know what that sounds like - toxic masculinity.

- That's all for now. Let me know your thoughts! All rights to the creator jojo!

[grabby-smitten]

How to build a fence in 3 steps

Subjects: Sylus Qin x F!Reader

Word Count: 1.5k+

Content: A sad attempt at comedy, crackfic, interactions, no beta and not edited, commas placed everywhere, idk… let me know if i missed anything. Zayne, Rafayel and Xavier are main characters… sort of…

When you finally became his and how he subtly let everyone know.

Sylus is not the jealous type, but he is always sure to be very clear about boundaries and limits. He’s very meticulous about it and he likes to let people know whenever that changes. Like building fences for a new empty lot he just acquired so no one would misunderstand and try to get in. He’s defining property lines.

Step 1: Plan the layout, measure and mark.

You’ve been staying longer and longer within the N109 Zone since your relationship became sort of official. Well, official for you and Sylus and probably the twins. Nobody else could really know you were kind of dating the head of Onychinus for various obvious reasons.

Commuting from one place to another became a bit of a hassle so you would let Sylus know in advance about your schedule and let him or Mephisto escort you back safely.

And today was one of those days. You have an appointment with your primary care physician, in other words, doctor Zayne. It’s been days since you let Sylus know about your visit to Akso hospital today but he seemed to have different plans.

“Sylus,” you called out of breath, once again trying to get his attention. Which was becoming a difficult task for both of you since you were sitting on his desk, legs wide surrounding his waist as he nestled in your neck. “Sylus… I gotta- I gotta go,”

He hummed, acknowledging your words but not moving a muscle to do as you said. He has been toying with your collarbone and neck for a while and you weren’t complaining before, but the reminder for your appointment already rang twice.

“You’re not really stopping me either, kitten,” the buttons of your shirt began to pop one by one as Sylus descended to your chest. His lips nibbled at your already tender skin and your frustration began to grow… your breathing became heavier… your hands gripping Sylus’ jacket…

When suddenly he halted his movements. Leaving a final kiss on your temple, he began to fix your clothes as if nothing happened.

“I think you’re right, let’s get you to the hospital,” in a daze, you tried to regain some composure.

A smirk played at the corner of Sylus’ lips as he accompanied you to your bike, wishing you a safe ride. He added that you should let him know once you arrived at the hospital.

“These don’t look like something a wanderer would make,” Zayne inspected the marks around your neck and down your chest. They were a bit more prominent around the area where the stethoscope should go.

You sat there, listening to Zayne’s words— completely and utterly mortified once realization hit you. You had left in a hurry, forgetting the small situation you and Sylus had been in.

“It’s not what you think—“ you began to explain but Zayne cut you short.

“Sure, then enlighten me, please,” sarcasm dripped from every word Zayne uttered.

“It’s… it’s… it’s iron deficiency.” you spoke under your breath. It was the first thing that came to your mind and quickly regretted it, mentally facepalming yourself.

“You know I’m your doctor, right?” Yeah, you knew and that’s why you internally cringed at his rebuke.

“Then as my doctor, you should know,” but, of course, you wouldn’t back down at this point.

With a deep sigh, Zayne quickly took his notepad and wrote down a few lines.

“Okay, then. For your iron deficiency.” He handed you the note which you put in your jacket without checking it. You just wanted to leave fast and pray so that Zayne could forget everything that just happened.

Once you left the hospital you finally felt like you could breathe. As you walked towards the parking lot, you pulled the prescription and your eyes widened as soon as you read what he wrote. Even your step faltered. He did not just prescribe you, contraceptives. That wasn’t even his area of expertise, you thought as you crumbled the paper, fisting it and aggressively shoving it down your pocket.

Once alone, Zayne couldn’t help but go over your visit again and again.

“What is she dating? A leech?” The doctor sighed, hunched over his desk as the whole situation passed through his mind for a fifth time. Debating whether he should be concerned or not.

Step 2: Dig the holes and add the concrete

Balance is the key to everything, right? So that’s why Sylus suggested that he can stay in your place too. Closer to your work and everything you own is there. He doesn’t mind, on the contrary, it’s lovely to be surrounded by your presence all the time. He finds you in the little details scattered all over your apartment and thinks it’s cute. Very you.

Xavier, your neighbor and fellow hunter, has begun to notice things too. Things about you and well, your private life. How could he not, even your trash had doubled.

Xavier noticed that it’s no longer just your stuff that’s lying around your apartment. Every time he asked to borrow something or meet for the monthly neighborhood meeting, there was more stuff at your place.

He took notice of the new pair of indoor shoes at your entrance, too big for your feet. The dark coat at your hanger and the leather jacket on your kitchen’s stool. All men’s size.

Xavier could even smell a faint new perfume all over your place too, and it wasn’t yours. He also heard the other neighbors gossiping about Y/N’s new handsome “friend” who visited quite often. How come he has never seen him?

Today wasn’t any different for Xavier. He just came to ask if he could borrow some eggs since he already burned the twelve-pack he got at the convenience store in the morning. So why? why were you cooking for more than one person and had the whole table ready for what seemed to be a romantic dinner?

He watched you roam around your fridge in search of the eggs and couldn’t help himself. His curiosity was killing him.

“So… you’re making dinner for two?”

“Ah!” You exclaimed, hitting your head against the fridge door. His question took you by surprise. “Yeah, cooking is not my forte but alas.”

“Tell me about it,” Xavier felt bad. The bump in your head that would probably begin to grow any moment now showed how little you wanted to talk about your dinner plans.

So he took the eggs, thanked you and left.

At his apartment, he noticed the brand of eggs wasn’t the usual one you always got. This one was more expensive. Yeah, he was sure you had someone else living there and yes, for some reason that irritated him a bit.

Step 3: Attach, cap and stain

“Ah, my boss wishes to acquire this piece for his girlfriend.” The guy buying Rafayel’s painting had sent a representative. It was not unusual but it was extremely boring.

“I think that’s very romantic, don’t you think?” Thomas added. He had to because Rafayel didn’t seem to be interested in anything they were talking about.

But now he realized that he should have paid attention.

Rafayel barely remembered the words of his latest transaction. How eager Thomas looked because the buyer had offered triple the amount of the original price. Now Rafayel stood shocked, seeing his own painting on your wall never crossed his mind. Especially the one he sold to be a gift for someone’s girlfriend.

It was a pretty small frame, something he did on a whim so what the hell was it doing here? And not at the supposed girlfriend’s house? This wasn’t right.

“Hey—Y/N!” He frantically called you over, “Y/N!” Again, he shouted like he was being murdered.

“Rafayel just a second—“ you were looking for your guns. Sylus had cleaned them earlier but you didn’t know where he put them.

“No! Why is this painting here?” He was about to hyperventilate and burn down his own painting.

“I swear if you say it’s ugly, I’ll smack you,” you said, walking out of your room and joining him at the entrance of your place.

“That’s not it! It’s mine!” He pointed an accusatory finger at the framed painting.

“Clearly not, because this is my place, last time I checked.” You frowned at his outburst which by now you were used to, but not… exactly like this one.

“That’s not— I mean I painted it!” Frustration was clear in his voice as he placed his hands on your shoulders and shook you back and forth.

“Ah… well, that’s go— wait what?!” You widened your eyes as you processed his words.

You were going to kill Sylus. But first, you needed to calm Rafayel down and then find your weapons.

Yes, nobody knew you were dating the head of Onychinus but they all sure knew you weren’t in the market anymore.

And that’s how Sylus fenced his property in just three steps.

Extra:

Luke and Kieran have never seen Mephisto so tired. What kind of mission had the boss given him? There wasn’t any super important job at Onychinus today.

The twins took pity on the crow. It seemed to be missing some feathers too.

[bots-and-cons]

Could you do a reader who has low iron? Platonic pls(characters are up to you) thank you for reading this your blog gives me life

A/N: Thank you, I’m so happy to hear you like my blog. I picked our two medics since this is a medical thing

~Ratchet~

•He’s noticed you’ve been growing more and more pale as the weeks go by, he isn’t even really sure how that’s possible, because you already looked very pale to begin with

•Ratchet is of course worried by this development, and he asks you about it

•You’re like “Nah, I’ve just got low iron”

•Ratchet is a bit confused at first, because to his knowledge, humans are not made of any sort of metal

•You have to explain the whole “iron deficiency” thing to him, and he at least mostly gets what you’re talking about

•He of course starts reading up on the subject, since he wants to make sure he knows if anything alarming starts to occur

•You can get quite lightheaded sometimes, which can be a bit dangerous if you’re sitting on Ratchet’s shoulder, because you might fall from getting too dizzy

•Which is why Ratchet doesn’t really like letting you sit there, because he knows his reflexes aren’t what they used to be

•You try to assure him that it’s okay and that you’ll tell him if you’re feeling too lightheaded and feel like you might fall

•He agrees to let you sit on his shoulder, but only if you let him scan your vitals and whatnot first so he can be sure you’re feeling well

~Knockout~

•Knockout pays a lot of attention to how others look, so when you start looking more pale than usual, he notices pretty quickly

•He asks why that is and you tell him about your iron deficiency problem

•Knockout is pretty ignorant to how humans work, so he doesn’t really get it and asks why you don’t just eat some iron then? “Something like nails should do, right?”

•This makes you basically roar with laughter, because all you can think about is him trying to offer you some iron nails

•When you calm down, you explain to him that no, you can’t just eat something made of iron, and that eating nails would probably kill you

•You tell him you need iron supplements and that you recently ran out and haven’t been able to buy more yet, hence the paleness

•Knockout is, yet again, a bit weirded out by how human bodies work and asks you if there’s anything he can do

•You tell him not to worry about it, but if he could let you sit on his shoulder for a while, that would be nice, because compared to a human he’s much warmer

•Your hands and feet are constantly cold, so if you kick your shoes of and sit on his shoulder with your hands and feet touching him, it feels nice since he’s so warm

•He doesn’t mind, so he lets you warm yourself up as much as you want to

•Knockout asks if this iron deficiency problem has any other effects than cold extremities and paleness 

•You give him quite a lengthy list of what it can cause and he wonders how you humans even function sometimes

•Isn’t it a pain to have to make sure you get all the vitamins and minerals and all that? He only needs energon and that’s that, so easy, but you need like a hundred different things just to survive

[yuri-is-online]

I just had a thought

Silver 🤝 anemic Yuu

Randomly passing out everywhere

They just have a little agreement and it's like "if my body starts fucking me over just look after it for a while pls". So now if you see silver sleeping, you'll probably see yuu sitting down next to him trying to read or something. It's mostly the same the other way around except silver is way more protective and kind of a mother hen when Yuu starts to feel light headed.

"I have a headache"

"did you take your iron supplements?"

"You know I didn't"

"take your iron supplements."

"...No."

This isn't very coherent I'm just thought dumping rn, but I like to imagine yuu helping silver put on concealer to cover up his dark circles and its all cute until they're washing the makeup off for the night and Yuus circles take up like half their face even though they damn near slept 24 hours last night.

Sounds like Silver x Me tbh I saw this ask and actually went to pick up my prescription

But seriously you can't out diet or out sleep a iron deficiency, I could see Silver being very intense about Yuu taking their meds, no matter what it was for. If your problem has a solution then that is something to treasure. If it caused side effects then he'd do his best to help make you comfortable too, he likes taking care of those he loves.

And he'd probably enjoy the help with his makeup I don't think he would be very good at it.

[sharkboywrites]

Can you do twst vice wardens (pls replace lilia with silver and ortho with ace) with a male reader that has a habit of not telling people about his various health problems. He has a whole iron deficiency and doesn’t tell anyone until he passes out in the middle of the hallway.

In the middle of a conversation he'll just drop an "Oh, my headaches going down" "you have a headache?" And such.

Thankyou!

"You what?!"

A/N: Hiii so sorry it keeps taking me forever to get to requests. I've been gone for a good amount of the summer on trips and stuff. I'm also dealing with some personal things. I made post about it, but for whatever reason it hasn't been seen. Anyways this request is so me, I'm either bothering people about my problems or literally never telling them to the point where it's concerning. I don't really talk about it but I do have some physical heath problems, so this feels nice for me to write.

Male reader, he/him pronouns used, author put his own health issues in just because, headaches, low iron, knee problems, heart problems.

Trey Clover

Trey is a very attentive older brother type, it would be very hard to hide something being wrong from him

But somehow you did

After all, with low iron, you never really know somethings wrong until you stand up

The two of you were relaxing after a lot of baking

Knowing there was an unbirthday party coming up, you decided to help him out

Unfortunately, you did over exert yourself quite a bit

You definitely felt off, but you decided it was fine and that it would probably go away

while the two of you were sitting down and talking, drinking some water, the timer went off

You went to get up and take the treats out of the oven when

uh oh

for a bit your head felt fuzzy, and you went down

To say Trey freaked out was an understatement

He really thought that you died for a minute

after getting you up and sitting you back down in your chair, he got the treats out of the oven himself

Once everything was settled and he made sure you were okay, you got a very lengthy lecture about taking care of yourself and telling people when you don't feel well

After this he gets very protective over you, constantly checking that you're okay and if you need anything

great job, you've activated the "big brother" part of Trey

Ruggie Bucchi

Ruggie could probably sense that something was wrong with you

Was he going to address it if you didn't say anything? no.

Listen, it's not that he doesn't care about you, it's just that he doesn't want to make extra work for himself

But don't worry, he ends up regretting that decision

When you're laying on your desk in pain

He stops and doesn't know what to do for a hot minute

And then he's off

He's running around the school trying to get what might help you

Water, food, pain meds

You want it? He's on his way to get it

He feels really bad about it later, please assure him

he'll get mad at you if you admit that it's common for you to never actually teel people you're in pain

He's also paranoid from now on

He'll constantly carry ibuprofen on him just in case and is very vigilant of your body language

he's worried about you

Don't scare him like that again please he can't take it

Jade Leech

It was really just a normal day

going to classes, trying to stay awake during lessons, and getting pestered by at least one of the eel twins

While having a nice talk with jade, something started to feel off

your chest felt weird

It didn't hurt per say, but it felt like it was racing

Having heart issues, you immediately knew what was wrong

Jade watched with a curious look as you took your water bottle and took a drink

He questioned if you were alright, and you told him what was wrong

With a calm look on his face, he immediately takes action

Your brought back to the mostro lounge and told to wait patiently as Jade disappeared for a few minutes

He later came back with a small meal for you and more water

He assured you that it had plenty of salt in it to help your heart's hard work and told you to take it easy

Now that he's aware of your situation, he's extra attentive

He may know somethings wrong before you do at this rate

And don't worry, he never doubts you or thinks you're dramatic if you ever tell him somethin may be wrong

Also has liquid i.v ready if you ever need it

He's now the number one person to go to when you're having issues

Jamil Viper

Parties can be overstimulating

So it's unfortunate that Kalim throws one almost every day

After an hour or two, Jamil thankfully found a less crazy sport for the two of you to sit

The two of you talked for a bit, enjoying the upbeat atmosphere

Halfway through talking, your head started to feel fuzzy, but you decided to brush it off and that it would probably go away eventually

Then Kalim called the two of you over

You couldn't figure out what he wanted you for, but the two of you got up anyway

When you stood up, the fuzziness in your head hit ten times harder, and you went down

Thankfully Jamil, with his quick reflexes, was able to catch you just in time

after assuring you were okay, albeit a bit panicked, you admitted you knew something was wrong, but decided to not say anything

And that's the story of how you got scolded by Jamil about taking care of yourself and telling people when something was wrong

He's much more on edge when the two of you spend time together from now on

He's constantly pestering you about how you feel, while trying (failing) to hide his genuine concern

Don't tease him about it, please

Rook Hunt

Lets be honest now, did you really think you could hide something from Rook?

Getting it away from trey? believable. Rook? Absolutely not

He is vigilant, nothing gets past him

Nothing

Even when you think he's not around, he is watching and he will know something is wrong

And the second he realizes your head hurts, he is all over you

Like showering you in concern and affection 24/7

if you were planning on keeping it from him, too bad

He's not giving you the chance

Really, he's treating you like royalty

You're in bed all day, dim lights, water, and any snacks you want

And he's not taking no for an answer

he's an extravagant man, what else were you expecting?

And from now on, he'll constantly be checking up on you

In the most dramatic way possible

He'll gently grab your shoulders and ask if you're okay

And if you aren't he'll grab your hands and with the most dramatic display, be so distressed for you and also praise you for being "so brave"

Such a dramatic man, really, but a dramatic man who's worried for you

Ace Trappola

Joining basketball with the boys sounds like so much fun, right?

Right???

Not really

Especially not when you've got a whole lotta knee pain

But it's alright, just power through it, as most people say

However most people don't realize that that's a bad idea

And unfortunately, you are most people

Forgetting your knee braces sure is unfortunate, although you thought it would be fine

It was not

Especially not when Ace decided to pull an "ankle breaker" on you

And it did just that

But with your knee caps

Listen, Ace may be a total jerk, but hearing a loud pop and then seeing you collapse...

He couldn't help but feel at least a little bad

But limping over to the bench you assured him that you were okay

Once sitting down, you took a deep breath and

another pop

And right back into place

And now you terrify him

This is something you can hold over his head at the slightest moment he starts to be a brat

Him doing the regular teasing? "Remember when you popped my kneecap out of place?"

Don't ever let him live this down

Silver

Unlike other characters on this list, it is so easy to keep something from Silver

It's not that he doesn't care, he's just very tired

But once he fins out that you've had a massive migraine this whole time, he feels so bad

he offers to get you anything you need

And once you're all settled, he looks so guilty

He may start to wallow if you don't stop him

Please stop him

Please assure him that it's not his fault

He really feels bad for not noticing earlier

Afterwards, he makes it clear that you need to tell him when you don't feel good

He also tries to be a lot more attentive from now on

He just feels so bad

This is where you both decided to work on communication skills

From now on, please tell him when you feel bad

he's worried for you :(

I'm finally back yaaay, but I took forever on this. i procrastinate so bad I'm sorry. I threw in my own physical problems too, hope y'all don't mind. ty for reading and gave a nice day :)

[fyoxi]

୨ৎ 𝓱𝓸𝓶𝓮𝓬𝓸𝓶𝓲𝓷𝓰 . . . ft. fyodor dostoevsky

fyodor dostoevsky x f.reader. hurt -> comfort-ish. bsd spoilders from ch. 53 on. brief mentions of a somewhat codependent relationship.

fyodor doesn't like leaving you in the dark. he can't tell you everything of course, though only for your own safety. he does try his best to tell you everything he can, so at least he knows you're worrying about him even just a tiny bit less.

but there are some things, albeit very few, that are out of his control. his capture and arrest had completely blindsided him, and he had no possible way of letting you know where he was, or what was going on, from that moment on.

his arrest was one of the few times in his entire life he felt genuine fear. not from being arrested. it was a type of fear that he felt deep in my bones, twisting like a boulder in his gut. it felt like the fear he had caused his whole body to shut down. he was afraid he'd never find his way back to you. you'd be left in the dark about where he was, if he was hurt, if he was even alive. and he'd have to sit in a cell knowing he could do nothing to ease your suffering.

his arrest was also the first time in his life he had felt such desperation. he pleaded, practically begged, the officers at meursault to let him write to you. but they all denied his pleas. even seeming to enjoy that they were able to deprive the fyodor dostoevsky, one of the world's most wanted ability users, of something he so clearly was desperate for.

it was pathetic, he thought, how every guard he encountered behind the prison's walls seemed to giggle gaggle about his situation. despite the fact that everyone in the room knew that if fyodor had been able to wield his ability, they'd all cower in fear.

but now they chucked and whispered amongst themselves as they stripped him of all of his belongings, including his wedding band. which he watched as it was tossed so carelessly into a bag, and he knew he'd probably never see it again.

they were harsh as they slammed the steel cuffs on his wrists and shoved his head down as they guided him to his cell. the cramped space that would essentially be his home for the foreseen future.

fyodor thought about you every moment he was awake. every passing thought he had would eventually come back to you.

when he was brought his meals, he'd think about all the meals you made him. cooked with so much care, and thought behind. making the best meals possible to help with his poor health. every soup, or sauce, or marinate soaking with that silly iron fish you were so fond of. but you swore boiling it in with his food would help his deficiency. and it could have been the iron fish, or it could have been love, but he did feel the healthiest he's ever been since he's been with you.

when he was laying down to sleep, he'd think of you. how he had taken for granted how comfortable the bed he shared with you was. how the mattress was so soft his body sunk into it. and he never thought he would miss such a thing, but he longed to have to move the obscene amount of plushies and decorative pillows off the bed before he could lay down.

even when he was plotting and scheming a way out, the thoughts mostly revolved around coming home to you. he promised himself he'd get out. of course he would.

there was no question that he'd slip his way out, the way it's certain that a rat would squeeze through the smallest of cracks. it was certain that fyodor would make his way back to you. the question was how, and when. the only sure thing about his plan, aside from its inevitable success, was that the very first thing he would do would finally return home.

. . . .

you learned of fyodor's arrest through the newspaper.

he hadn't returned home the day he promised, and while you were worried beyond measure, you had managed to convince yourself — somewhat — that he would be home very soon.

you missed him dearly, but life needed to move on. that's what fyodor always told you "i may be away, but your life must still go on, milaya"

you saw the paper on display in a shop while you were picking up groceries. out of the corner of your eye you saw the front page, and immediately recognized fyodor.

it felt like the headline had crushed you immediately, and despite the words from fyodor that you tried to live by when he was away, the whole world seemed to freeze in its place. at least your world did.

while the whole world moved on around you, it felt like you were stuck in place. pinned down by a weight that felt like a hundred tons blanketing your whole body.

for almost a year fyodor was gone, and you barely managed to keep things moving. doing the bare minimum to keep things in your home running. everyday seemed to bleed together, and day and night no longer had any difference to you.

the dependency you had on fyodor wasn't something you were completely proud of. but you couldn't really help it. even before him something in you felt hollow. you got on just fine, but it always felt like something was missing. a feeling that only went away when your life had collided with fyodor's.

you and fyodor had connected so deeply from the moment you had met each other for the very first time. your lives and souls so intertwined that fyodor being gone felt like a part of yourself had gone away with him.

most days you spent laying on the couch. you had moved to spending most of your time in the living room. the bedroom was too big for just you. the bed was too cold and empty without fyodor to share it with, so you had taken to the couch. spending nights lulling yourself to sleep with fantasies of fyodor returning home, and your days staring at the front door. hoping that the door knob would turn, and fyodor would come in.

a day dream you had fallen so deeply into at times that you had managed to convince yourself it would really happen. sometimes finding yourself practically sprinting towards the front door at the slightest noise. it was always a disappointment that left you in a weeping pile on the living room floor.

eventually you somehow managed to stop yourself from making a scene at every little noise. but despite your best efforts, you just couldn't get yourself to accept that fyodor would never come home. you still had hope that you'd be with him again.

this day was just like every other day before it. you barely managed to get through even the smallest of household chores before you took to the couch again. staring at the front door, zoning out as you tuned out the random talk show you put on in the background to pretend that you had company. though it did very little, almost nothing, to ease your loneliness.

and the doorknob jiggled.

this was really a new low for you. had your day dreams become so vivid out of your desperation that you had actually started seeing them ? how pathetic you'd become. you wondered if fyodor would be ashamed of how desperate you'd become.

and the doorknob shook again.

there was a muffled mumbling outside, accompanied by a series of the door knob twisting and shaking. like someone on the other side of the door had stuck something in the lock in place of a key to try and open the door.

you sat up right on the couch, staring at the door. your mind rushed with a thousand thoughts. a break in ? your landlord wondering where you've been ? maybe someone had mistaken your apartment for their own ?

a thousand thoughts ran through your mind, but one stuck out that made your stomach light up with butterflies and nerves all at the same time. surely... this couldn't be fyodor.

you sat up straight as a pin, staring at the door with wide eyes, like a deer in headlights, as you watched the lock turn and the door open.

fyodor closed the door behind him, and time felt like it was standing still as he stood in front of the door. neither of you moved. you couldn't believe it was real. or you wouldn't let yourself believe it.

"milaya.." fyodor finally said. he spoke the word with a heavy exhale, like he had been holding his breath for so long, only letting it go when he said the name.

hearing him was all the confirmation you needed. lunging up from your place on the couch, and cried out his name, colliding hard against his chest, it was almost painful, but you didn't care. you didn't even think about it.

your legs latching around his waist. it knocked fyodor back, using his hand to brace himself against the wall, and holding you up as tight as he could with his other arm. his time in prison had left him in the worst physical state he's ever been in.

you tried hard to form words, but all that came out was a mix of heavy sobs and cries of his name. and fyodor didn't bother to start a conversation, leaning his body against the door to be able to hold you.

he absolutely reeked. the smell of dried blood, build up of body order, and stale water all mixed together. but just in this moment, you wouldn't have been able to tell that scent from the smell of a basket of freshly picked berries, or the top of a baby's head. to you, with your face tucked into the side of his neck, he smelled like the sweetest thing in the world.

"im home, milaya" fyodor said as your cries turned to soft sniffles and whimpers, his voice was raspy and weak, he sounded out of breath and sickly.

"you're home" you repeated, your own voice shaky, on the verge of breaking into sobs again.

"i'm sorry. i'm so sorry."

fyodor's apology was simple. but 'sorry' was not an emotion fyodor often had the need for. so when he said it, when he said it to you, he meant it.

his apology was met only with another quiet sob, your tears running down the side of his neck, soaking into the collar of the prison attire he was still dressed in. fyodor felt his own eyes burning, his own tears threatening to make an appearance.

he could only imagine the suffering you'd been through this past year. but he knew it was tenfold worse than his own. while he knew that you were alive and well at home, as he was rotting in his cell planning his escape, you had no idea what the state of his well-being was. you spent the last year wondering if your husband was dead or alive.

he never wanted that for you. he took your marriage, his vows to you so seriously. you had been joined in the name of god, and it was his job to protect you from such suffering. he felt like he had failed. fyodor never failed. at least never on something he held so deep in his heart.

"i'm sorry" he said again

there was another long moment of silence, your sniffles and fyodor's shaky breaths as his own tears ran down his face being the only noises filling the air.

it was a while before you took a deep breath and spoke again. "you stink," you said. your blunt words were an attempt to lighten things up. it was a joyful reunion of course, but the heavy fog caused by the suffering of being apart for so long had not yet been lifted.

"i know" fyodor nodded, wiping his face with the back of his sleeve, trying to regain his composure.

fyodor kept you in his arms as he made his way towards the bedroom, using the wall to assist him. his steps were slow, and his legs were shaky, but he didn't once ever think of putting you down until he was able to set you down on the edge of the bed.

he squeezed your hand, firm but gentle, before going to the dresser to grab a fresh pair of lounging clothes.

"i'm filthy, milaya"

"you gonna shower ?" you asked him. he nodded in response. "i didn't get rid of any of your things," you said, getting up to follow him into the bathroom.

"i know" he said with a slight nod, and a little smile. "i know, you didn't"

you sat down on the closed toilet seat, your knees pulled up under your chin as fyodor turned the shower on and began undressing, tossing the prison uniform in the direction of the trash can rather than the laundry hamper.

your heart sunk as you saw the state his body was in. of course you noticed how unstable he was when he was carrying you, but his physical state was a wreck. his skin was shades paler than it usually was. it looked drained of all colors. leaving his body a sick gray color. and he had become so thin, like he had become nothing but a skeleton wrapped with skin. his rib and hip bones stuck out. his body looked like he was a dead man walking.

"i'll be okay, milaya" fyodor reassured you as he stepped into the shower, like he was reading your mind.

you stayed in your place on the toilet seat as you waited for fyodor to shower. you still felt a deep seated worry that this was all in your imagination, and if you left the bathroom fyodor would simply disappear again.

it took fyodor quite a few washes of his hair and body before he finally felt clean. by the time it was done, most of his products were empty.

he turned the water off, and slid open the curtain "could you hand me a towel, please ?" he asked

you nodded, quickly getting up to grab a towel from the rack in the connected bedroom. you handed it to fyodor, who was shivering as he stood naked in the shower, hair dripping wet.

he ran the towel over his head before wrapping it around his waist, and stepping out of the shower. you took your place back on the toilet as he brushed his teeth, scrubbing maybe a little too rough with his toothbrush.

he spit into the sink, spitting up globs of blood along with spit. you watched as he used his hand to rinse out the sink and his mouth with water, before filling a cap full of the mouthwash from the cupboard.

everything in the house was still in the same place as it was when he left home the last time. his hand gripped the side of the sink, groaning in pain as the alcohol based mouthwash burned the tiny cuts in his mouth from brushing so hard. he spit in the sink and rinsed it out one more time before turning off the water, and dressing himself in the comfortable lounging clothes he had pulled out before.

"do you feel better ?" you asked

fyodor nodded, taking a deep breath that seemed to allow his whole body to finally relax as he exhaled it. "much better"

he nodded towards your bedroom "bed ?" he asked. you nodded eagerly, having been so desperate to finally be back in bed with him after so long.

fyodor made his way to the bedroom, taking off all the plushies and decorative pillows off the bed, and placing them down on the ground. and he honestly couldn't think of a single complaint about it. maybe he didn't entirely understand the need for the over consumption of anything and everything soft, but he understood now that this wouldn't be your home without them.

in almost comical, the synced movements you made as you both got into bed and under the covers. you moved as close as you could to fyodor. it still didn't feel close enough. you wished you could merge into him, to become one. you never wanted to be away from him again. you wanted nothing more in the world then to be with him every second for the rest of your life.

"i'm glad you're home" you whispered

"i'm never leaving again" fyodor responded, thin fingers running across your hair

"you promise ?" you asked, your voice shakey, on the verge of tears again.

"i swear my life to god. i am never leaving you again, milaya"

[actuallyacryiptid]

This game has such a chokehold on me... Any time I think about it I start tweaking out

HEADCANON TIME!!!!

(They are just random ones)

-I feel like gibbo would have a iron deficiency, he gets up from his chair too fast and the lads going right back down (just like me fr)

-rennick likes to feed ducks... (I feel like he would do bird watching (old man activities))and If any of the crew members saw him doing that in public he would probably murder them (it would feel like seeing your teacher at like the grocery store)

-infected addair has a bunch of teeth, it's like a sharks mouth in there

-trots looks like he would smell nice... That nice dad/grandpa smell... I just wana sniff him..

-caz once dressed up as a princess because his girls wanted him too, they then wanted to go out for lunch with princess caz

-Roy dresses up as santa on Christmas

-alex likes spaghetti (not anymore...)

-Roper once lost his pen, he asked around if anyone had one and Muir pulled out a giant pencil from like a pocket or something (Muir has been waiting for the day someone needs a pencil just so he could do that), Roper never asked anyone again...

-muir once got a cold and was the most dramatic person ever about it (it wasn't even that bad), he acted like he was dying all day (he got some good soup from Roy and it all of a sudden made him feel better)

END OF HEAD CANNONS BECAUSE IT'S 1 AM.... GOODBYE OIL RIG GANG

[literaticat]

Publishing aunty please help. Need advice, not publishing related.

What do you do when you're just tired, feeling unfulfilled and want to run away from everything? :( 

That sounds like a classic case of Burnout to me, though it could be combined with something else -- like Depression, or even a medical problem.

(For example, at one point a couple years ago, I was absolutely exhausted for no discernable reason and burst into tears at the drop of a hat -- I chalked it up to "winter blues" and ignored it -- come to find out, eventually, I had severe anemia and my body was not absorbing iron at all and actually it was an autoimmune disorder and became a Whole Thing! Uh... oops!)

This article from the Cleveland Clinic gives a lot of advice about what to do about Burnout -- but the most salient points, I think:

Be gentle with yourself. Everyone goes through it sometimes. You aren't a failure, you're going to be OK, you just have to take care of yourself before you can properly take care of anyone or anything else. So with that resolved:

TELL YOUR SUPPORT SYSTEM HOW YOU ARE FEELING. Keeping this stuff undercover is not going to help. Being honest with your friends/family/partner or whoever your "people" are will lighten your mental load AND they will want to help and support you.

Figure out what your stressors are and tactics to deal with them. Part of this will be linked to the previous part, probably -- For example, if you are burdened by too much work -- DELEGATE or ASK FOR HELP! You've told your support system what's up with you -- now tell them what you need to move forward.

Set Boundaries. If you're the type of person that says yes to everything and then you feel overwhelmed -- remember that it's OK to say NO. It's a good thing, actually. You'll be more "on" for the things that are actually important if you are able to protect your own boundaries and aren't wasting energy on bullshit things. I can't stress enough how important this is (and it's something I am always working on, because it can be tough!) -- but my life CHANGED when I made certain rules for myself and stuck with them. For example, mine: No checking email after 7pm or on weekends. At all. I gotta tell you, my life suddenly got a lot better. (I have forgotten this one recently, and my life has gotten markedly worse -- so I gotta get back to that!)

Go to the doctor. Yes, going to the doctor sucks! But they can make sure your bloodwork is OK, you aren't Vitamin D or Iron deficient, rule out any problems (like, I dunno, severe anemia)... etc etc. Like, step one of Self Care is knowing what your Self is working with. (And if you think you might actually be capital-D Depressed or have anxiety, etc -- ask for a referral to a psychiatrist to see about getting some medicine. IT WORKS!)

Practice Self-Care. Yes, that means the boring stuff like "hydrate" and "make you are getting enough sleep" and "eat your veggies" and "meditate" and whatnot -- but also, you want to "run away from everything"? DO IT. Take a vacation -- or even a staycation -- or even a DAYcation -- where you are literally not doing ANYTHING for anyone else, no email, no nothing. Get a pedicure with extra massage, sit in sunlight with your favorite drink, read a book or just think about NOTHING -- you have no responsibilities except to yourself during this time. It's rejuvenating!

Get toxic feelings out of your system. Find a therapist, if you can afford to do so. (There may be free or inexpensive options if you are a student, or with some insurance, some therapists have a sliding scale for patients, etc) A therapist can give you at least somebody to talk things out with who doesn't know you and isn't judging you. If that's not for you -- journal? Do something artistic? Go to a rage room? Climb a mountain and scream a lot?

Now you are on the road to being healthy, physically and mentally, you hopefully have less stress and are getting your forty winks and all that good stuff -- and hopefully you'll be MUCH better soon.

Good luck!

[dissociacrip]

the amount of new age health marketing schemes, misinformation, & sometimes overt science denialism i see in chronic illness communities (or adjacent) online is honestly terrifying

this is just an example but there are people insisting in the iron deficiency facebook group i'm apart of that the emf our phones emit could be depleting ferritin levels due to what looks like an in vitro study that only provides a line of inquiry for researchers to look into, it doesn't have nearly enough evidence to suggest mobile phone exposure leads to something like iron deficiency or iron deficiency anemia, and these people talk about emf as if they think only certain things have an emf instead of everything having emf because everything emits radiation and the potential for illness induced by emf exposure very much has to do with the intensity and duration (obvious example being nuclear radiation) & from here it looks like this claim probably has the same reliability and scientific validity as "cell phones can give you cancer"

looking up GERD on instagram got me a ton of "wellness coaches," one of them insisting that tanning is actually good for your skin because it's a "natural process" whereas sunscreen is "unnatural"

it's understandable why this stuff takes hold of so many people due to lack of education, lack of accessibility to education, the uptick in science denialism thanks to the way covid-19 was and is still being handled, and the way societies & healthcare systems continuously fail us, but that's what makes us vulnerable to developing these kinds of beliefs and marketing tactics

arm yourselves with scientific literacy skills and evidence-based information to the best of your ability, & look out for those in your communities who can't; obviously science and medicine aren't these immutable morally pure things that can always be relied upon and are always used for good, i think it's fair to say that's really never been true, but there's a difference between recognizing that and falling into the trap of things like "actually, sunscreen is what causes skin cancer & raw milk is more beneficial for your health than pasteurized milk"

[illusioncanthurtme--art]

I get being unsure about making the lack of blood be the cause of Gideons....Gideonsness but as a vampire myself (severely iron deficient to the point I take 325mg iron pills 2x daily now) it really just be that way sometime. Made me act out and so tired I couldn't do shit but sleep for like 17 hours a day even if in the middle of something before soooo...tldr just don't feel bad man (totally unbiased cause I love your art)

dsjkhdsdfhs eeehehehe thank you omg!! 😭 Thank you for giving me your two cents on my gideon idea. I could talk about him for a long time, I swear. (I had anemia at a few points in my life, but I never had many symptoms... at least none I really noticed)

I'm crazy insane tired atm so sorry if my rambling doesn't make sense. (funny saying that fter I just stated the above LMAO, maybe I'll have my blood checked out after all) Big ramble about vampire gideon under the cut:

I think most of my reluctance with this idea comes from the fact that Gideon already has a very good, interesting, well put together backstory, and even a good redemption (although you don't see him as a redeemed person for very long). So, if I were to tack on this extra element and say part of his unhinged-ness comes from this Thing, it pulls away from all the other stuff that made gideon who he is: the way he was raised (pageant girl esque, not treated like a regular kid, probably never said no to), the fact he was an outcasted/bullied by his peers, the journals and amulet promising to give him power, and the subsequent descent into madness. It's all very good on it's own. And after all that, you WANT to see him figure out how to become a better person. Key words: figure out. Character development should always be a struggle for a character, and not something that's simply handed over.

That being said, it's funny I came up with that elaborate idea and now I'm shutting myself down dslhfhsldflkjhgfl?? Also, it's a fucking kids show and I'm a fully grown ass adult coming up with a plotline for a fictional cartoon character, so it's like, who cares. Why does it have to be perfect. But I think thats just how much I really like Gideon?? I want to do him justice and "write" him something nice :'DDD (write in quotations because I ain't writing shit)

An idea I had (that I'm also not sure on, because it complicates things, and I think ideas becoming convoluted is never a step in the right direction) is that MAYBEEE gideons vampirism was a dormant gene until he came in contact with the amulet, and started doing other magical stuff. Then it became activated, and started effecting him negatively. From there, even after he decided to become a better person, it became his cross to bear in life. Sort of like his scar from the whole experience (not counting the emotional ones, oof).

So that's where my mind is now. I like this idea, but I'm trying to tread very carefully, because I want to make sure he's still facing his actions and personality head on, and the vampirism isn't a scapegoat for how he is, or what he did.

[bethelctpride]

When it feels like it'll never get better and you won't make it to age X

First off, body maintenance. that organic meat suit vastly influences your outlook on life. Here's an interactive, self paced checklist to do the body maintenance so you feel less like shit

Hydrating, eating, a nap don't fix everything, but you get you back to the baseline where you can do other things to feel less like you are Doomed to Suffer.

Long term first step make sure you don't have a medical issue that's making you feel like microwaved ass. Mental health issues fall in same category because a lot have organic basis of "hey, body is making too little of This! gotta get store bought supplements!" Which can range from iron deficiency to missing brain chemicals. Sometimes your body is making too much of something and can fuck you up. Or alternates doing both. (I'm looking at you, thyroid. you little fucker)

If you're specifically having the thought you won't make it to age X, whatever that is, you're probably young. And the younger you are, the less control you have over your life in both big and small ways. That might include getting health issues addressed. If you know something is wrong and adults keep telling you "oh you're making it up, its not that bad" yeah, that's gonna make you feel more like shit.

Sometimes adults are shitty. and if you constantly feel like "nothing ever gets better" and no one supports you, you don't know enough people.

When you feel like you're doomed to suffer the last thing it feels like you have time for is volunteering. But it's what I genuinely suggest doing. (your school may even require some to graduate)

Volunteer somewhere that is NEW to you. Not associated with your family, school, church, whatever. Because if you aren't getting support there, doubling down is not going to fix it. You need to meet more people. You need to meet people who are getting to know YOU first, not the idea they have of you from others.

Volunteering will help you feel like you are doing something meaningful. And it introduces you to a whole bunch of other people who care deeply and wanted to make a difference. Hanging out with people who share a similar interest in making the world less shitty will help your outlook on the world in general and your specific circumstances.

Maybe it only helps to get you from "I won't live to see X" to "I guess I have to live past X because I want to see this project to the end."

But you made it past that date, however reluctantly, and you now hopefully have more options and more autonomy. There's no magic fix here for that level of despair. But you can slowly fill that dark pit of despair with things that lift you up to the edge where you can see the light still exists.