#i played the game when it first came out… BACK IN 2016!!!

[pokewatcher20]

Guess who just beat Detective Pikachu 2 🎉

[duskerot]

Hey… Do you know the song sung by the voice actor from the pilot Hazbin Hotel? Called Thank you and goodnight. Weirdly this song reminds me of Mystic Messenger, despite being a new fan and having been into this game until this year 2024 I already felt a connection, seeing old posts about this game from an old fan somehow makes me tear up. Despite I'm a fan of 2024, I somehow feel nostalgic about this game despite never actually experience it before

i don't actually, i've never seen hazbin :0 i just looked up the lyrics tho and i see what you mean!

absolutely no shame being a "new" fan, actually i'm really happy to hear new people are finding the game in 2024 !! i first downloaded it in 2016 and only recently redownloaded it last year for the nostalgia actually :') it's silly but this game and others by the same devs actually mean a lot to me lol

[talenlee]

Game Pile: Kentucky Route 0, One of Three Games About America

Script and Thumbnail below the fold!

Kentucky Route Zero is a magical realist point and click game of what I’d normally call Narrative Adventure, which came to kickstarter in 2011, then came out in 2013, 2014, 2016, and 2020, because you can’t have nothing for free, even things you pay for. The game is a text-driven game without any of the trappings of your typical point-and-clicker where you jam a ladder in your pants and try to work out why you want to put green dye in the water fountain. Instead it follows the haunted mind of Conway, a trucky driver and his interactions with small handful of people on a part of the Kentucky Interstate, while he to find the place he needs to do his delivery, despite being utterly lost.

I enjoyed what of Kentucky Route Zero I played, but the thing that stands out to me in hindsight is its sound design. It’s a beautifully defined game, audio-wise, with all sorts of thoughtful foley for its environments, and the way that even the pieces of the interface that Conway interacts with have their own sort of specific authentic sounds, chonks and thunks and ch-zzzzses.

It’s also visually splendid, beautiful in what it tries to represent in the heightened reality of its setting but also the format of a videogame. These places look good from the angle that’s chosen, creating lines of artwork and bars of cages, depending on what you’re focusing on, and by being a fixed-camera story of its type, Kentucky Route Zero takes on traits of theatre, with blocking and careful positioning and timing all making up part of how the story unfolds.

A story I haven’t finished.

See, I don’t feel like playing Kentucky Route Zero Act V.

Sit down, traveller. Let me tell you a story.

There’s a chance you’ve heard this story before. I’ve anonymised it here, not because I think you shouldn’t be able to work out who it is, but because the idea of focusing on the who runs the risk of ignoring the what. Plus, I don’t want to direct anyone to a person who said something stupid and encourage fights. That’s not the important issue.

This is the story of when someone perfectly represented something, and probably never realised it.

You will sometimes hear me talk about the take that ‘there are three games about America,’ with a tone of utter revulsion and derision. This is from an incident back in 2020, when a game developer and advocate for inclusive games, had an opinion, on the internet. This advocate is well-established and has a big audience, but also, he’s crucially, not a white guy, not a Christian guy, and not an American guy. These are factors that play into what he said, which was, in summary, that while Kentucky Route 0 was no doubt phenomenal, he wasn’t interested in playing it right now.

To this, an actual adult responded with:

This is legitimately the worst take you’ve ever had. There are only about three games that are actually American, and this is one of them. Everything else is designed for export. Kr0 is a precious and valuable thing. It is of immense and intense personal importance.

Now, resisting the urge to argue with a tweet, which is just generally a bad practice that leads to doing things like wanting to be on twitter, and setting aside this tweet conflating ‘this is of personal importance to me’ and ‘this should be of importance to you,’ this position describes the idea that there are only three games that are ‘actually American.’

What does it mean to be ‘actually American?’

America is a pretty pervasive presence, if you’re not aware of it. Most people in the world have to know about what’s going on in America. We know about your Presidents and your Senators and your Constitution, to the point where people can be more aware of how your country’s laws work than their own country’s laws. I’ve often seen it held up as an example of how poorly educated people in say, Canada and Australia are that we believe we have, say, a ‘first amendment right,’ but the thing is you have to ask why there is that.

We watch so much American TV.

We listen to American music.

We try to make our news broadcasts look like yours, because that’s what real and legitimate news looks like. We try to retell your stories in our local languages because that’s what real media looks like. Our children sing songs in your accents because that’s the culture that a multi-trillion dollar economy has pumped into the whole world.

America demands we attend their wars and surrender our living to become their dead and when we are done America sells the survivors a cheeseburger.

This is not a remarkable or controversial statement. You must know, this is not even vaguely challenging to know about. Everywhere in the world is replicating parts of the American empire, because America exports and enforces the vision of the American empire. McDonalds may sell curry in India, but it’s very important that the curry being sold is McDonalds curry because that is how you know it’s an American style curry.

What this means is when someone tries to assert there are only really three games about America, that’s a kind of specialised brain rot that requires you to consider games that are very much about America as not being really about America. And thus we see the other thing about America, which is it’s not enough for America to be the most important place in the world that everyone else in the world needs to recognise, but also, most of America is inadequately America for this vision of America. You saw this in the wake of 9/11, and the election of Barack Obama: huge amounts of American media resurged in extolling the values of ‘real’ America, as opposed to the parts of America where the vast majority of Americans lived, which just so happened to paint a lot of marginalised people living in the cities as ‘fake Americans.’

I am not bringing you unique information. This is just obviously true things if you don’t live within the boundaries of an environment that flatters you as the most normal thing in the world. The vast majority of the world is not America. There are eight billion people in the world, more or less, meaning that America is about 4% of the world, and yet, it is catastrophically, overwhelmingly, deleritously the common touchstone for how things are ‘supposed’ to work. This is through media imperialism, which is mostly supported by American companies exporting all their media to foreign markets extremely cheaply.

‘about three games that are actually American.’

This fascinating piece of doofusry still, even now leaves me agog. ‘Actually American.’ Kentucky Route 0 is actually American, you see, as opposed to… what? Is America’s Army one of them? You know, the game financed by the American Army? What about Call of Duty, a franchise that is in part subsidised by American military complex manufacturers? What about Grand Theft Auto, a videogame that tells the rags-to-riches story of American excess in criminality, setting aside the way it’s made by a Scottish company. Actually American, because American doesn’t mean America, it means one tiny little pool of ‘America’ where the speaker can imagine there’s a realness and an authenticity to the America-ness that doesn’t involve all the messy realities of what it is to be America. It’s the towns of hard-working people, that suffer under your particular description of oppression, whether that’s cities full of nonwhite people or corporations bleeding the country dry, always eliding the social cruelties and terribleness of these places, as if giving people money stops them from being bigoted (for example).

This is then used to recruit these poor, superior Americans, the you know, America Americans, whose sufferings are noble and whose authenticity cannot be impeached and they are then used as a defense against criticism of, you know, America. It’s the same speech Charlie Daniels gave about how foreigners may think they could push around Barack Obama (a dude who bombed a lot of shepherds with the most elaborate and brutal military ordinance in the world) but they were going to have a harder time taking on Americans who wrestled alligators, who at this point have exactly zero recorded drone strike kills.

This is because America America isn’t real.

‘Real’ America is a nebulous nothing that you can project whatever you want onto, and which is also not responsible for anything terrible that America does. It’s not the American Empire, it’s not the exporter of culture, it’s somehow purer, better, a sort of individualised folk who are to be protected and extolled, shriven of all the things about America that make it anything but its perfect idealised form of America.

I could go on.

I really could.

This is something that defines the world I have to live in. I speak English. I’m white. I’m from a coloniser state. I should be able to integrate easily and smoothly into the white supremacist capitalist hierarchy of American culture, but we are told, that no, we are not acceptable. We are only valid as long as our differences are invisible. We, a real people, do not get to have opinions on America, because we do not know True America. When you spell colour wrong in a chat message, when your accent isn’t quite right, when you don’t know the difference between junior and sophomore year of high school, then you are shown, you are evinced, and you are made very aware that you are other, you are outside, you are wrong.

And really, there’s no good reason for it. We send our soldiers to America’s wars, we buy America’s submarines, and we sing your songs. Our currency mimics America’s, our culture permeats with America’s, we even have such a crushing inferiority complex about the empire that there’s an academic term for what we feel about our own media compared to the media of the truer, proper empire to which we are vassal.

The term is ‘cultural cringe,’ and it was coined by Henry Lawson, who you, odds on, have never heard of. In 1894, he wrote:

The Australian writer, until he gets a “London hearing,” is only accepted as an imitator of some recognized English or American author; and, as soon as he shows signs of coming to the front, he is labelled “The Australian Southey,” “The Australian Burns,” or “The Australian Bret Harte,” and lately, “The Australian Kipling.” Thus no matter how original he may be, he is branded, at the very start, as a plagiarist, and by his own country, which thinks, no doubt, that it is paying him a compliment and encouraging him, while it is really doing him a cruel and an almost irreparable injury. But mark! As soon as the Southern writer goes “home” and gets some recognition in England, he is “So-and-So, the well-known Australian author whose work has attracted so much attention in London lately”; and we first hear of him by cable, even though he might have been writing at his best for ten years in Australia.

This is imperialism. This is a way in which we have been induced and brought by the empires around us to accept their ways as correct, as the normal, as default. And that is the mindset you must have if you want to look at the breadth of videogames, with their American ideas like health insurance, readily available guns, the importance of freedom, the ubiquity of air travel, the branding and iconography of types of food and the sports metaphors and then say ‘yeah, this doesn’t have anything to do with America, not really.’

Anyway, this thread, this incident, was a big deal at the time, in that there were a lot of people from within the community of game developers and journalists who seemed very happy to line up and get mad at a brown foreigner for being inadequately enthusiastic about the possibility of playing a videogame. But don’t worry, after a day or two, an apology was forthcoming for all of this fracas, by which I mean, the original developer apologised for being so thoughtless as to, again, express honest lack of enthusiasm in a videogame.

For me, this was a kind of break point, where I started just blocking indie devs on sight. I don’t want to know what they’re involved in, I don’t want to promote their work, and I will hold tiny grudges against them that I do not seek to transfer or encourage in others. This was one silly incident in which a lot of people said something silly because they don’t know better, or they’re arseholes.

None of this is fair to Kentucky Route 0. It’s a game with its own intentions and its own perspective. It’s not trying to make this conversation happen. Kentucky Route 0 has been choked and gripped by this position around it, where to talk about an American game, someone put a cross on it that made it the avatar for All Things America. The wild thing to me is that I had, prior to this point, played two episodes of Kentucky Route 0. I thought it was pretty good, and I liked what it did with the negative space of dialogue options – when a character you’re controlling makes excuses, the excuses you choose show you other things you could be making excuses about that you, the player, didn’t know beforehand. That’s some good Narrative Storytelling Design, I like that a lot. But now I can’t really engage with Kentucky Route Zero because the main thing it makes me think about is how this final chapter, meant to round out the game’s story and present a conclusion and a point, became this flashpoint for a lot of people to be very casually racist.

Which kinda poisons the whole thing for me. It’s an authentic thing, I’m sure, it’s a thoughtful thing, too, but the people stepping up to say I should care about it did so in a way that made me hate them.

Any time you see me say ‘three games about America’ I’m talking about this, and the attitude of a particular kind of American that America is, as always, exceptional. It’s real easy to not realise when you’re just voicing your self-centeredness and how easy that is to ignore the opinions of people around you and what they’re saying. This is what I’m talking about when I mention ‘the three games about America.’

[fade for credit text]

By the way, the three games about America are Crash Bandicoot, Sam & Max Hit The Road, and Bust A Move.

[sunsetkerr]

STAYING DOWN | s.kerr

summary: you and sam kerr are on-pitch rivals, but when you're teammate hurts sam during a game, you're the first one on the ground with her (or.. 4 times you watched sam hurt on the ground, +1 time you helped her up) [1.8k words]

pairing: on-pitch rival!reader x sam kerr

notes: I love this one a lot..

(1) 2015, FIFA Women’s World Cup - Group Stage

“did you like that one, l/n?” god, you thought. she’s insufferable. you watched as she celebrated with her team, green and gold flooded the box. it was no secret that you couldn’t stand sam kerr. the whole world knew practically, and watching her celebrate a goal whilst looking directly at you just made you hate her even more.

“piss off” you shook your head as she jogged pass you to reset play. 

“oooh” she chuckled at you, her smirk only growing, “feisty today, are we?”

commentator voiceover JP DELLACAMERA: ooh, we can see on-pitch rivals y/n l/n and sam kerr having a few words with each other after l/n just scored her goal

JACQUI OATLEY: i think they’re constantly having words if i’m honest

JP DELLACAMERA: it seems that way, doesn’t it? Kerr and l/n are one of the most interesting pairs to see on the pitch in my opinion

JACQUI OATLEY: no i completely agree, i love seeing how they egg each other on; very entertaining

JP DELLACAMERA: seeing them play each other at arsenal and chelsea, but then seeing them on a national level is just great football

JACQUI OATLEY: it’s funny to me, both great goal scorers, but they somehow always find a way to be next to each other on the pitch

JP DELLACAMERA: sweden taking a corner now… and rubensson sends it into the box and y/n l/n headers it into goal!

JACQUI OATLEY: phenomenal work from the young swede

you threw your hands in the air as sofia lifted you up. you turned around to see sam, on the ground, knocked down from the commotion in the box, with a frown etched on her face. you grinned down at her with a chuckle and shouted, “that was for you, kerr!”.

(2) 2016, WSL Season Chelsea vs Arsenal

commentator voiceover IZZY CHRISTIANSE: and sam kerr scores her third goal against arsenal! and it’s a hat-trick for sam kerr!

PIEN MEULENSTEEN: ooh! and she’s collided just outside the goals with arsenal player, y/n l/n IZZY CHRISTIANSE: looks like they hit each other pretty hard at the hips there.. kerr and l/n are both down

you groaned clutching at your hip bone. “will you watch where you’re going!” you looked over at who banged into you, of course it was her.

“you right?” she winced, holding onto her own hip.

“no thanks to you” you spat at her.

sam threw her head back in pain, “oh fuck” she hissed. you heard someone come up behind you/

“you okay, y/n?” they wrapped their arms underneath your armpits and pulled you up. it was caitlin. you were thankful to be back up on your feet, you muttered a quick thank you whilst you rubbed at your hip. “sam?” she asked her matildas teammate. caitlin always tried to be a neutral force when it came to you both, the two of you too strong willed not to butt-heads on the pitch.

“i’m good” she nodded, still groaning.

“i’ll get the trainers” catilin said before flagging over the chelsea trainers, who were already on their way out.

“come on,” caitlin patted you on the back before walking back to the centre with you. you rolled your eyes, hearing sam groan behind you. she crashed into you, and she’s complaining? figures.

(3) 2017, Algarve Cup Group Stage

you and sam were both gunning for the ball. she was behind you, trying to get the ball out from underneath you. you tried your best to hold it, but didn’t have to try for much longer as sam fell to the ground clutching her ankle. “fuck, fuck, fuck” she winced. 

you turned around, holding on the ball under your foot. you contemplated helping her up, making sure she was alright. 

“y/n!” but your teammate, lotta, was shouting at you as she had set up her position. “run down!” she shouted to you. you got the ball moving again, shaking off steph catley, ignoring sam’s cries in the background.

commentator voiceover JACQUI OATLEY: looks like y/n was a little concerned for sam kerr there

JP DELLACAMERA: that’s a surprise to me

JACQUI OATLEY: l/n crosses the ball in to schelin and it’s a goal!

JP DELLACAMERA: great assist from l/n there JACQUI OATLEY: and even better shooting from schelin

JP DELLACAMERA: a great duo those two

(4) 2022, Sweden vs Australia Women's Friendlies

“that’s two, y/n” caitlin grinned at you as she came off the high from her second goal of the game. 

you chuckled and shook your head, trying to suppress your grin. “shut up caitlin, you’re a show-off” you laughed. you weren’t too fired up this game. your team hadn’t managed to score yet, but the matildas were playing better than you- they deserved to win the friendly.

“and i love every second of it” she grinned.

“i’ve got next caitlin” her voice came out of nowhere, but once you saw her your mood was ruined. sam was jogging past you both with a big grin on her face.

“yeah, sure” you scoffed, heading back to your side of the pitch. it took sam only five minutes of play to score. 

“that was for you!” she sang to you, running straight past where you watched her score. you rolled your eyes, your friendly spirit that had been present in this game was officially ruined.

commentator voiceover JACQUI OATLEY: and kerr has scored on chelsea teammate zećira mušović, getting the matildas third goal for the game, with Sweden still sitting at zero. ooh, kerr has stopped celebrating. she looks to be a little bit of pain. 

JP DELLACAMERA: she’s had a few troubles with her calf, hopefully it’s nothing”

“you good?” you watched as sam limped back to her position as the game reset. 

“agh, shit” she hissed through her teeth, “my calf has been playing up” she admitted, giving it a quick rub.

“do you need a trainer?” you asked her. you stammered before adding, “y-you’re taking up my space on the pitch”.

“nah, no” sam sighed, shaking her hands as she stood up straight again, “just give me a second”.

“are you sure?” you asked

sam raised her eyebrows at you before taking a deep breath, “careful, l/n.. kinda sounds like you care”

“you’re on my half of the pitch” you almost erupted at her accusation, “get moving” you shooed her away.

(+1) 2023, FIFA Women’s World Cup Bronze Medal Match

it was the seventy-fifth minute when you watched her go down. magdelena’s tackle was brutal, you waited for the whistle to sound, but it never came. game resumed play and mags was off running with the ball as sam was on the ground clutching her calf in pain.

you jogged over to her, “are you okay?” you asked.

“fuck!” she cried, panting through the pain. 

“stop time!” you turned around and called down to the referee, but she just ignored you and continued watching play. “hey!” you called again.

“holy shit,” sam put her head on the ground, still holding her leg close.

you looked around for help, and saw the matilda’s physio running out onto the pitch to see sam. “the physio is coming” you told her, “hold on a second”.

“hey! call time!” you screamed down the pitch again, “fucking hell, she’s hurt!” 

“hey,” you watched as z held onto the ball in the box, stopping play herself. the referee finally officially stopped play and began to walk down towards yourself and sam. “she’s been down for at least a minute, you are supposed to stop play!” you shouted, “what kinda refereeing is that? bullshit”

you stayed close while the physios tried to get sam onto her feet. you knew she had just come back from injury, she was doing too much. sure, you didn’t like her. but you couldn’t help but feel inclined to make sure she was alright.

and for some obsurd reason, the feeling was still there even after the final whistle blew and you had won a bronze medal.

you found sam sitting on the pitch, her head in her hands. you hesitated before crouching down next to her, “i’m sorry about the loss” you said, holding your hand out for her.

sam looked defeated as she saw who it was, “you deserved to win” she sighed, shaking your hand.

“you did lots of great work for football sam” you admitted. you took a deep breath before continuing, “is your calf okay?”.

“it’ll be fine” she nodded. you noticed the tears in her eyes, “thanks” she whispered.

“good game” you said, before standing up and heading off.

sam sighed, “you too”.

alanna headed over to check on her captain, just having watched the exchange between you and sam. “what did she want?” your rivalry was no secret, everyone knew that you both weren’t opposed to having words after a tough game.

“to see if i was okay” sam’s tone whilst still defeated, had a hint of surprise buried beneath it.

“yeah alright” alanna scoffed, holding out her hand to help sam onto her feet, “comes over to you after we’ve lost, sounds about right”

the night had wound down for the matildas. sure, they had an afterparty to go to, but there were lots of tired girls walking the ground.

“i’m gonna sleep on the bus before we have to go out” sam chuckled, zipping up her puffer jacket. “i’m ready to party” macca chuckled, giving sam a little nudge.

“it’s a constant emotion for her” alanna laughed.

“shut up, i-“ mackenzie was cut off, your voice peaking the trio’s interest. they saw you over by the sweden bus, particularly close to your teammate, a sour look on your face.

“what the hell what that about?” you asked. “what do you mean?” mags chuckled.

your eyes widened in shock, “i mean what you did to her was totally illegal”.

“it’s football, y/n” she said simply, trying to walk onto the bus.

“that is not football and you know it” you stopped her in her tracks, continuing your conversation. “we were already up, you didn’t have to do that” you said.

“sam is a tough girl, she’ll be fine” magda didn’t seem particularly remorseful, especially not after injuring her own teammate at chelsea. “you know she just came back from injury, going after her calf like that is just not alright” you shook your head at her

“i didn’t ‘go after’ her calf-“

you cut her off, “could’ve fooled me” you laughed.

“you know what, y/n-”

“girls that’s enough!” your coach cut you both off, “we just won a bronze medal, care to cool off a little bit” she raised her voice at you both.

“don’t play dirty,” you finished, pushing past her to get onto the bus.

“rich coming from you” she said, “last season you hated her, what’s changed?”.

you paused before answering, “nothing.. i just prefer to play by the rules” you lied.

“what the fuck?” alanna whispered, shocked by your change in demeanour.

“that was.. strangely nice of her?” macca looked to sam.

“i know” sam furrowed her brows, “what the hell”

“a change of heart maybe?” alanna chuckled jokingly.

“who knows” sam shrugged. maybe you two could get along after all.

[buzzyb33]

OMD pls pls pls i beg u babes ur hc r sooooo good a dad Simon minter would be a great hc in my opinion anyway love youuu

Prompt: head cannons of Simon minter with a wife and two kids- twins!

Warnings: swearing, pregnancy,

Finding out you were pregnant in the late January 2016 wasn’t too nice, you and Simon hadn’t really discussed family, you just knew he wasn’t opposed to the idea.

Building up the courage was pushing time, so going at it and getting him as he edits a second channel video.

“Si? Can I talk to you?” I say and sit on his beanbag.

“Hm? Yeah, course.”

He pulls his headphones off and looks at me, noting the unsure look on my face.

“I’m- pregnant.” I say finally.

He smiles at me then let’s it fall.

“Is- that a good thing?” I smile back.

“I- was hoping so..” he grins and pulls me into a tight hug.

“It’s a great thing n/n- I know we haven’t really spoke about it but- it’s a wonderful thing..”

From then on he came to every scan and happily told the boys that I was pregnant, JJ was dumbfounded that his best friend was married and now expecting.

Halfway through the pregnancy you got very interesting cravings, Simon still loved everything you did.

When your waters broke you were 8 and a half weeks pregnant Simon was with you At every moment, squeezing your hand and soothing you through it all.

He grimaced slightly but stayed there.

When the nurse let you hold your baby boy it was all worth it, Simon held your baby girl, the joy on his face was unmatched.

The next day Simon announced on Twitter that he’ll be having a break from his channels and only present in main sidemen videos.

A month later, Y/n happily agreed to let the boys come over to see the twins (which had been named Aaron and Aria).

JJ, Josh and Freya came round first to see the twins which JJ was instructed by me how to hold them.

He smiled a cooed at Aria while Josh held Aaron and Freya hurried him so she could hold him.

“Y/n, I got you a little bag, for you.”

She hands me a bag and I smile.

“Thank you Freya.”

I adjust my position and Simon talks to Josh and JJ, him holding Aria and me holding Aaron as Freya coos at him.

The next to come see them was Tobi, Harry and vikk though it was clear Harry did not trust himself to hold them.

By this point, I was almost fully healed, my stomach had went back to normal but I was still recovering a bit.

I sat next to Harry as Tobi asked him if he wants to hold Aaron.

“Nah- boys, I’m fine I just- wanted to make sure si and Y/n was alright? Yeah- you know.”

He spewed out with rosy cheeks.

“Harry, let me show you how to hold him, it’s alright.”

I smile and he hesitates as Tobi gently hands me Aaron.

I fix his arms and let him hold the baby boy, his eyes light up but his lips twitch, still not trusted in himself.

“Relax, Bog.”

Simon laughs.

Vikk is completely mesmerised by Aria as she squeezes his index finger.

“Awe, Simon..”

I let a smile play on my lips as Harry holds him.

As the other boys come round over the months the babies start smiling more.

Simon wore the baby carriers on his chest, Christmas 2018 was their first Christmas and Simon was so good, he loved them and gave them all equal attention, I worked in law which I didn’t mind doing from home as they needed the attention.

Simon was more than happy when his daughters first words were ‘DaDa.’ He was so happy.

“Y/n! Come here! Quick! Sh- Ari just said DADA -say it again honey..”

He sat there until she said it again.

He was ecstatic.

As they got older, Aaron showed his love for basketball while Aria did football.

Simon tried to hide his excitement that one of his kids had an interest in football.

When they were three he signed Aria up for under 5 girls football and Aaron for soft ball (as he was too young for basketball)

He went to every game with me and occasionally dragged one of his friends along.

Simon was always caught having at least one of them hanging off his limbs.

When they were four and developing their own opinions, Simon was in for a treat for how much his son spoke.

One day when he was recording a more sidemen video- standing up- Aaron sauntered into the room.

“Well no- that’s not how you play the game JJ, are you-“ Simon scoffed in an irritated tone before being cut off by his door opening.

“Daddy-“ his voice trailed off.

“One sec boys, yeah Aaron?”

“Can I sit in here with you? Ari said that- the dogs don’t like me.” He said as he rubbed his eyes.

“Mate- yeah okay.”

Simon bends down and puts his son on his beanbag with his iPad.

“Did you just call your son ‘mate’?” Ethan laughs.

Another time was when all four of us went to the park and me and Simon just sat together, in peaceful noise as other kids giggled and screamed around us.

I smiled at him and really took in the moment, he was a great father, we had good money and good kids to raise, we were gonna mould these kids into who they were.

During the sidemen penalty shots Aria went up and smiled proudly- she had dark brown hair like her mother and her Fathers dark blue eyes.

“Hi daddy!” She called as she got the ball into position.

“Hi honey!” He grinned back as he got ready to save the goal.

“Simon! Don’t be a bitch! Save her shot!” JJ called as Simon laughed and agreed.

For a five year old- she packed a shot- scoring as Simon went the other way.

He frowned at the fact he missed it and Aria grinned.

“Bye daddy!” She said and ran off to the sides.

“Bye honey!” He called back.

During times of dates and your and simons… alone time, Josh and Freya or Vikk and Ellie to babysit- maybe Callux but he always got help.

Simon absolutely adored his kids, his wife and overall, the way his life had turned out.

When Faith found out she was pregnant in February of 2022 Simon immediately dumped every single baby detail and fact he knew on Ethan just so he was at least a little bit prepared for fatherhood.

As of times like now, the twins are six and thriving in their sporty lives and Aaron was socially, not so much Aria as she was a lot more introverted (maybe a bit more clever) than her brother.

(Simon also info dumped on Randy when Laura was pregnant with harper)

Out of all of his friends, Aria loves Callux the most and Aaron loves JJ the most, Aria doesn’t leave his side, frankly she cried the last time he had to leave.

Aaron also likes Ethan a lot as he says funny (stupid) things that makes him laugh.

At 6 years old the two seem to have a very bright future which just causes simons heart to quadruple in size.

A/n: I’ll be honest, I had not much idea about soft things so..

Request me some stuff though!! I did mostly enjoy writing this and there will be a grey FIC out on Wednesday!

If you want you ask me to add to this specific story.

REQUEST ME SOMETHING 🙏🏽

[commanderchr1st]

Why I left tumblr suddenly in 2017 at the apex of my blog commanderchrist.

I'm sorry to "break character," but I gotta say some shit as Joe that's been bothering me for years. It is corny, it is personal, it is emotional, but I've recently been facing a lot of personal turmoil, and I gotta say some shit.

I'm not calling anyone out, not trying to start drama, but for quite some time I've had some baggage that has caused me a great deal of mental damage, tbh. More below.

Hey all, 7-8 year old drama here. I've told my friends this story, and I've also kind of hinted at it, but I've never really gave an official response why I left tumblr in April of 2017. It's a really long story, and it's been connecting to a process of grieving multiple friendships, two relationships. I've never really wanted to talk about it too terribly much on an account that is so closely associated with what happened, I mainly spent time venting on private tumblrs, going to see doctors, therapists, psychiatrists, etc. For a half of a decade, I was extremely upset, and honestly, it kinda came back in 2022.

First off, fartdick-supreme was a blog I made a few days after I left commanderchrist. I was obsessed to see a particular user disparage me, make false claims, and I was very, very angry on that blog. So, if you do snoop a little, just know that's a hella mentally ill college kid writhing in pain, not a coherent blog at all tbh.

The above picture was sent to me on discord in November of 2016 before they started telling one of my friends I called them fat (and they knew that person had self image issues and most importantly I didn't), racist, treating Tumblr like a meat shop, telling somebody I had a crush on that I was exploiting them because of their pill addiction (just an insane thing to say tbh), conspiring with an ex that cheated on me to write a callout post about all of this and more lol. I deleted in 2017 because I was unmedicated, going through a pretty severe breakup, was taking more than a full-time load at school, and this former friend was doing shit like this almost every day of the week. I refused to talk about this until I've had a LOT of time to heal because tbh somebody who I considered a close friend doing this kinda shook my mental health. I deleted, but I never left. I really don't want to leave their URL or talk specifically about anyone who was impacted on tumblr, but this has also affected a lot of individuals I used to be friends with. And for a lot of that, I was the scapegoat. I accepted this blame. Even though I didn't do like...any of it. At the most, I was a mentally ill alcoholic who had a really hard time navigating friendships. A good deal of friends also had their own individual hardships, especially this individual who had spread these accusations to myself and my friends.

I think it's important to say that all of this started because I was talking shit behind the friends back. I said they were a sore loser, I said they were impossible to talk to, I said they were bossy when it came to playing games, I said they needed to work on their anger issues. And I denied it to them, which I should not have. I should have told my friend all the problems that I was having with them. I failed to do that, because they were a very defensive person. My friends tried too, but they did not have any luck. So, it manifested as anger, and I did talk shit about them to those friends. Word got back to them, and this is how it all started. I'm not going to point any fingers because MOST of those friends, I am still on good terms with, but there were definitely a few that also seemed to share similar frustrations in a public setting.

Maybe it's because I'm mentally ill, but I refused to confront this. I deleted. I left. I went on medication, I finished my degree. But I did not ever once publicly defend myself.

Fast forward to now, and in 2022 I was faced with a very similar situation. I had broken up with my partner of four years. I REALLY don't want to get into the details of that relationship because it was incredibly toxic. I did a couple things I was not proud of as a response, especially when it came to involving my family in our relationship. Both my ex and my mother tried to drive a wedge between me and the other person, and it was maddening. It was a horrible way to live. Especially since every interaction I had with my mother was her trying to pry me from that relationship. At the time, I thought she was being manipulative and shitty, but everything changed in December of 2021 when my ex went to go visit family and I was left alone after moving several times, being evicted twice during covid, making some dumb mistakes financially, and it all dawned on me.

I was being abused. My ex from 2017 had BPD, which is fine, but my ex from 2022 also had this condition. And I was able to see a parallel: I REALLY don't want to go in detail about my relationships tbh and was one of the reasons I didn't want to bring it up, but in both relationships I was put into some fucked situations. In both, any time I had issues with something it was like pulling teeth... 0-10 on the intensity meter. I would bring things up and immediately be disparaged, yelled at, etc. In one of those relationships, they were drunk daily and would call me up and yell at me. They were also sleeping in the same bed as their ex boyfriend for months and not telling me (it was long distance). They also had some sexual exchanges with a pretty well-known tumblr user. The other, long story short, sexually abused me a lot. Put me in a situation of fatherhood when I explicitly mentioned I did not want to be a part of it. They said it was okay. And it was all okay, until all the sudden our bank account was shared and I had moved to a different state. They trapped me financially, and cornered me into fatherhood. The rest of the abuse got a bit more intense when I was left isolated without family in the state I was living in. This shit is hella hard to talk about, but those two are linked. In December of 2021, I realized everything. I was terrified, depressed, isolated, and ruminating. I broke up with my most recent ex in 2022 because...well its complicated but I misinterpreted this grief as me being gay. I thought I was purely attracted to men, and vagina repulsed. It took me longer than this to realize no, I was repulsed by my ex because of sexual abuse. Anyways, when I broke up with them, they threw shit all over the place, some at me. They screamed at me and told me that I was a waste of four years. And they immediately told me I could not be a father anymore and could not see the child. When just month prior I was given a deadline on providing a child for them.

What did this all have to do with 2017?

I've lived long enough to see me make some pretty big mistakes twice in a row. It's not the relationships I regret, despite the abuse. It's the lesson that I failed to learn myself. I need to stand up for myself more, and not accept blame when I did not do anything. I've been diagnosed with (at the very least) minor Obsessive Compulsive Disorder recently, I've had some mental issues in the past. But we are exploring that this may have been derived from PTSD. I think these two scenarios have been a part of it. I've let this get under my skin. In 2022, I lost a couple friendships because I did not explain ANYTHING to them, and my ex spoke to them a day or two after our breakup when I was still grieving, processing, trying to figure all this shit out. I'm ready now. I am a mentally ill person who suffered abuse from other mentally ill people. I have made the mistake of allowing THREE people who have mistreated me and left me with lasting trauma rule my life. They made me run, I've allowed myself to become all the things these abusive people have wanted me to be because I did not stand up for myself, I did not deny anything.... I ran like a coward. I'm sorry for doing that.

To the select people who have heard these rumors from these people in my life, I don't blame you for believing them. As a matter in fact, I'm sorry that I did not explain everything to you.

It will not happen again. And if we have had conversations in the past, or you have considered me a friend. A friend. Not a funnyman, not a "derailer," not anything on this site. If you have talked to me, if you know me as Joe, not Jog. Feel free to DM me.

I've stopped with the anon messages, because tbh I don't want to deal with them. I've had this individual and a couple other send me them throughout the years. If they have anything to say, I'd appreciate them striking a conversation with me via here, discord, whatever. And the same with you if you're curious. Just come to me, ask. I won't yell at you. I won't say anything I won't want to say, either, so if you ask and we were never close or didn't have a friendship in the past, I may not be inclined to share more receipts that I have from this time frame. But I'm an open book.

If you've read this far and you've thought some of my posts are funny, videos, whatever. I just wanna say thank you for sticking with me and appreciating it. And thank you for hearing something out that you may have not had a general interest in. Again, this is not a callout post or anything like that. This was years ago, I'm ready to move past this. I need to heal, and if you were a part of this... even if you were shitty to me, I want you to heal and get help, too.

[misshoneyimhome]

Never gonna give you up | Auston Matthews  

Tags: soft!auston; Austonxreader;

A/n: I couldn't sleep last night, and this is what happened 😉 hope you enjoy it

-

I just wanna tell you how I'm feeling Gotta make you understand Never gonna give you up Never gonna let you down Never gonna run around and desert you

"Never Gonna Give You Up" - Rick Astley

*

You had been dating Auston for most of the 2022-2023 hockey season.

Initially, you weren't entirely sure about getting involved with an NHL hockey player. But Auston was persistent. His charm had this peculiar effect on you, and eventually, you couldn't resist.

And you've never looked back since.

Despite Auston's hectic schedule, the ups and downs of his hockey games, the constant travel, and all the media attention, you loved being with him. He had this incredible personality that just clicked with you from day one.

And when the Leafs made it to the second round of the Stanley Cup, you were over the moon.

You were genuinely happy for Auston, and all you wanted was to see him happy. And hockey made him happy, so you were all in, no matter what. The good, the bad, and everything in between.

But then the Leafs lost. And the offseason officially started.

It had been an incredible summer with Auston. He took you to meet his family for a few weeks, you were his plus one at Mitch and Stephanie's wedding, you even joined him for some of his publicity stuff when you had the time.

Honestly, it was kind of fun being a part of his world.

Before you met Auston, you weren't really into hockey. Sure, you knew the sport existed, but you didn't really get it. That all changed when you ran into a frazzled Auston in the cereal aisle at the local supermarket. Cereal boxes went flying, and the rest, as they say, is history.

A few weeks later, you went on your first coffee date.

But it wasn't just the hockey games stressing Auston out. His contract was also on his mind. He had one more year left in Toronto before it expired, so he needed to re-sign or potentially join another team.

But he really wanted to stay in Toronto. It was his team, the one he'd been with since 2016. It was home.

And it was your home too.

Normally, Auston would mostly think about himself and his career. But ever since he met you, he couldn't help but wonder how you felt about it all. To be honest, maybe all his worry wasn't just about re-signing or his salary.

He was also worried about you and your relationship. You didn't grow up in the hockey world like many other girlfriends and wives. You weren't used to how the whole moving teams and cities thing worked.

And that had Auston beyond stressed out.

**

And it was this worry that led to a conversation one casual Tuesday evening. You were both sprawled out on his sofa, watching TV after a delicious dinner.

Auston was on his back, facing the TV, and you were on top of him, your head and hand on his chest.

His breathing was slow, but it wasn't steady. Auston had something on his mind.

Out of the blue, he broke the silence.

"(Your nickname)," he began, still staring at the TV.

"Yeah, baby?"

He turned his head to look at you.

"What if I don't re-sign?" his voice was low and shaky.

"What do you mean? You still have one more year," you matched his low tone and looked up at him, resting your head on your hands.

"Yeah, but what if I don't re-sign or get traded?" His eyes looked sad, and his expression screamed worry.

"Then I guess you'll find another team that'll be lucky to have you," you reassured him with a soft smile.

"Yeah, maybe... but," he bit his lip, struggling to get the words out.

"But what, baby?" you raised yourself up a bit, supporting your weight on your arms, and looked deeply into his eyes. "Auston, you're an amazing hockey player, and you played so fucking well this season. The team even came closer to winning the Stanley Cup, which, from what I understand, is pretty impressive, and you were a big part of that."

Auston nodded slightly, and a small smile crept back onto his lips. "I know... it's just... what about us?"

"What about us?" you asked gently.

"I mean, if I were to move... what about us?" His smile faded again as his eyes locked onto yours.

You let out a little sigh. You'd talked about this before, but it was different back then, when you were just getting serious. At that point, you both wanted to take things slow and not think too far ahead. You just wanted to enjoy the moment and see where it led.

But now, it was time to face it.

"Aus," you whispered gently, "Remember when we first started seeing each other? Your determination and how many times I said no," you said, your lips curving into a fond smile. "Even though deep down, I knew I wanted to be with you, because I had my doubts about dating a pro athlete,” You paused, collecting your thoughts. “But you, Auston, you changed everything. I couldn't resist you. I fell head over heels in love with you. And I'd be in love with you anywhere in the world. So, if it means embracing your hockey career, then that's what we'll do - together."

Auston looked at you, silent for a moment.

Your eyes locked as he absorbed your words.

"So... you'd be up for moving with me if that's what it takes?"

"If you want me to move with you, hell yes," you almost whispered, smiling as you saw the wheels turning in his head.

"I'm never gonna give you up, you know that, right?" he grinned.

"Oh, I'm counting on it," you giggled softly. "You won't get rid of me that easily."

[shefaniquotes]

SHEFANI PLAYLIST (Spotify 🎧)

Songs that have been referenced by Blake or Gwen in connection to their relationship or are otherwise associated with them

1. Hotline Bling – Drake

💬 Blake: "Gwen sang it to me on 'The Tonight Show' one night, so ..."

🎼Call me on my cell phone Late night when you need my love I know when that hotline bling That can only mean one thing

2. Step By Step – Eddie Rabbitt

💭 Blake often sang this song in BSers Lounge – fans associated it with Shefani

🎼First step, ask her out and treat her like a lady Second step, tell her she's the one you're dreaming of Third step, take her in your arms and never let her go Don't you know that step by step, step by step, you'll win her love?

3. Leather and Lace – Stevie Nicks

💬 Blake: "We should [cover that song]." Shefani fans favorite since Gwen performed the song in December 2015

🎼But I carry this feeling When you walked into my house That you won't be walking out the door Still, I carry this feeling When you walked into my house That you won't be walking out the door

4. I've Been Lookin' – Nitty Gritty Dirt Band

💭 Back in summer 2018, Blake’s mom posted a video of them singing this song while driving in OK

🎼I've been looking for a love Someone to hold as I lay sleepin' I'm not talking 'bout someone Who's scared of promises Or keepin' 'em I'm just looking for a love To stand the test of time I've been lookin' for someone To be all mine

5. Baby I'm-a Want You – Bread

💬 Gwen: "What’s that song that I love…?" - Blake: "Baby I'm-a Want You by Bread?"

Blake on The Voice: "Gwen's not kidding. We listen to Bread all the time."

🎼Used to be my life was just emotions passing by Then you came along and made me laugh and made me cry You taught me why Baby, I'm-a want you Baby, I'm-a need you

6. There’s No Stoppin’ Your Heart – Marie Osmond

💬 Blake: "I love that song ‘There’s No Stopping Your Heart."

🎼I plan to be the one who sticks around Ooh your love could lift me up above the clouds I get so high when I'm with you, I may never come down When forever starts, There's no stopping, no stopping, no stopping your heart

7. I Want To Know What Love Is – Foreigner

💬Gwen: "You took a song that’s actually on my makeout playlist"

🎼I wanna know what love is I want you to show me I wanna feel what love is I know you can show me

8. So Small – Carrie Underwood

💬 Blake on The Voice back in 2016: "I completely got wrapped up in the lyrics of that song. You delivered the message to me tonight, and I totally related to the lyrics of that song."

🎼And what you've been out there searching for forever Is in your hands Oh, and when you figure out love is all that matters after all It sure makes everything else Seem so small

9. Haven’t Got Time for the Pain – Carly Simon

💬 Gwen: "I would dedicate this song to @Blakeshelton gx."

🎼All those crazy nights when I cried myself to sleep Now melodrama never makes me weep anymore 'Cause I haven't got time for the pain I haven't got room for the pain I haven't the need for the pain Not since I've known you

10. Stricken – No Doubt

💬 "She asked me if I knew the song Stricken and told me she recently sent it to Blake."

🎼I love you completely I guess I'm kinda mad about you I love you, I love you I do Love overcomes all of my senses Lowers all of my defenses, yeah

11. Defenseless – Kirk Jay

💬 Blake: “This is my life right now.”

🎼Oh, I'm defenseless Like a drought to a flame I’m defenseless Girl, when you say my name But the thing is I have never felt safer than this

12. Lookin' For Love – Johnny Lee

💬 Blake before playing the song: "I’ll try. I gotta do it for Gwen."

🎼Well, I spent a lifetime lookin' for you Single bars and good time lovers were never true Playing a fools game, hopin' to win And tellin' those sweet lies and losin' again You came knockin' on my heart's door You're everything I've been looking for

13. Turn Your Lights Down – Bob Marley and the Wailers

💬 Blake: "Gwen and I have a playlist. I want their version." - John: "It's a good love song for when you guys..." - Blake: "You're talking about loove."

🎼This potion might, this ocean might, carry me In a wave of emotion to ask you to marry me And every word, every second, and every third Expresses the happiness more clearly than ever heard (uh) And when I play 'em, every chord is a poem Tellin' the Lord how grateful I am because I know him (what? word) The harmonies possess a sensation similar to your caress (uh)

14. In Your eyes – Peter Gabriel

💭 The first dance song

🎼In your eyes The light, the heat (Your eyes) I am complete (Your eyes) I see the doorway to a thousand churches (Your eyes)

15. Islands in the Stream – Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton

💬 Gwen: "That song would be my dream if me and Blake could do that song together one day."

🎼I can't live without you if the love was gone Everything is nothing if you got no one And you did walk in the night Slowly losing sight of the real thing But that won't happen to us and we got no doubt Too deep in love and we got no way out

[lakemojave]

Mojave's Top Ten Games of 2023 (3 of which actually came out this year)

I figured I should make a list like this at some point, but I didn't actually play many new games this year. Well, I played tons of games for the first time and loved so many of them, but few of them were new releases. At my current stage as a game critic, I'm playing a lot of catchup, trying to get context for current games, playing the classics and the seminal franchises of the medium. I do not have a game of the year pick. Even though I was behind the curve, I still wanna talk about the experiences that moved me this year.

Honorable mentions:

Baldur's Gate 3 (2023): One of the densest, fleshed out, satisfying narrative RPGs the gaming industry has seen in years. Immersive, well written and charming, no two people can have the same experience with this game because of how much variance and player choice is accounted for in the gameplay and script alike. It's for that reason it's not on the list though--not only have I not finished it, I'm also not doing it singleplayer, and am missing out on much of that juicy story content in favor of me and my group's meta-narrative.

Black Mesa (2020): The remake of the first half life is sharp, smooth, and immersive, combining what was visually and narratively compelling about Half Life 2 back into the original story. It has some of my favorite setpieces of the entire half life catalogue now, which is saying a lot. It's off the list in favor of the original.

Dead Space (2023): A triumphant return to the horrors of the Ishimura incident, with insidious twists to the game design and story that disrupt a fan's familiarity with the game world time again. It scared the fuck out of me so many times, but the bittersweet feeling I get thinking about the fate of the Dead Space franchise means RE4 gets its spot.

10. Oxenfree 2: Lost Signals (2023)

The long awaited sequel to 2016's Oxenfree caught me by surprise after playing the first game just before it. Playing the original teen horror, I'm struck by how grating some of the dialogue can be, how sophomoric and cheap it can feel without drinking deep of the content. What makes this version of teen horror so compelling, though, is that through sympathetic participation with Alex, you catch yourself from griping at the young characters for making foolish choices, which is very effective.

What's stunning about this sequel is that in the 7 year gap between games, it's not just the team and the audience that has matured, it's the writing all around. Your character, Riley, is in her early 30s, returning to her hometown and feeling very existential as she peers into the past, the future, and the unknown in between time and space. The world of Camena and Edwards Island is expanded on those lines, the thematic focus becomes resonant and emotionally devastating, and the dynamic with young characters, familiar or not, demonstrates how strong this second chapter to the oxenfree story really is.

9. Resident Evil 4 (2023)

Look. I love a horror game. 2005's Resident Evil 4 may be among the best of them, and it may be timeless in its own right, and it may be foundational to so many other games I love today, but god damn is this remake fun. With sharper visuals and atmosphere than the original, intricate new resource systems like knife durability and parries, and some updated character work, it's safe to say this is a categorically different game than the original. Plenty of material was cut from the main game, like the IT fight or the laser hallway, which found their way into the DRASTICALLY improved Separate Ways expansions, starring Ada Wong. It's not my favorite Resident Evil, and it's far from the scariest, but it's the one with Leon's spin kick, and there's nothing more satisfying than that.

I do maintain a lot of early gripes I had with the remake. When Resident Evil 8: Village came out in 2021, it borrowed a lot of mechanical, narrative, and aesthetic tropes from RE4, updating them to a new game in the wake of the remakes of RE2 and 3. Those remakes were truly transformational masterpieces, blending all of Resident Evil's best aspects to create new, distinct experiences. RE4, the original, didn't really need much updating, it's been ported to hell and back already and is so ubiquitous that there was no real need to bring it back into the zeitgeist. Nothing can really be gained by this remake except for a victory lap for Capcom.

Cynicism aside, FUCK YEAH, TWO CAKES!

8. Mass Effect (2006)

I should say that the version of Mass Effect I'm playing is not the one that came out in 2006. The Legendary edition does a bit of graphical and mechanical tweaks to update some of the dated aspects. That's kind of a shame, because the dated aspects are what's so fascinating about Mass Effect. Between Baldur's Gate 3, Disco Elysium, and now the early Fallout games, I find myself taken by classic CRPG design, which accommodates such a wide variety of player choice. Mass Effect doesn't have too much choice in it--the progression and ending are pretty much fixed from the beginning, you basically choose what flavor of the script that you want.

In that way, I like Mass Effect as a transitional piece--an attempt to bring the aspects of early CRPGS into the modern, console games market, with all the budget EA would give them. The writing and design are...satisfactory. The shooting could be more robust, the characters could have more personality, and to the series' credit those things do come about in Mass Effect 2 (which I'm sure I'll gush about when I finish it).

It's the presentation I love here. Mass Effect has maybe one of my favorite sci fi settings I've ever seen. A vast array of alien civilizations, a rich history filled with interesting lore, a competent portrayal of intergalactic politics, all delivered by characters that are deep and interesting. The voicework is also some of the best I've ever seen, and although there are many standouts, Jennifer Hale's Shepard is just tremendous. Actually playing Mass Effect may be a slog, completionist play might require some of the worst loot grinding I've ever seen, but that is all secondary to the way I was captivated by Mass Effect's version of the final frontier.

7. Half Life (1998)

I did a whole ass 5 hour video essay about Half Life, and I don't wanna belabor how much I like this game and series too much more. I loved Half life 2 and the portal games for years, but it was only for that project that I actually got around to playing this. It's a real bonafide classic, containing so many tropes of modern immersive action games WAY ahead of their time. The setting of Black Mesa is deep and engaging, the environmental storytelling is strong, and the voicework is natural and believable (for the most part.) Sometimes as a game critic I have to give some allowances to an older game for some of its jank and some of its rough edges, let myself see the thing just for what it is without all my modern hangups. I don't have to do that with Half Life like I do for other games. There's parts of it that are rough, like the Interloper and On a Rail chapters, but Half Life feels just as good to play now as it did 25 years ago.

6. Dredge (2023)

There's an old tumblr post that proposes a fishing game that's secretly a horror game. That post imagines a game that starts out normal and comfortable, but as the game goes on the player would catch stranger species of fish, soon finding monsters lurking in the deep and hidden secrets. It got a lot of peoples' imaginations going and engaged a lot of fan artists and even more comments riffing on this idea.

Dredge is that game. I was so gleefully surprised to see this game go through every single one of those steps in the first region alone. The game has a strong atmosphere and great art, leading to some real weird and nasty fish to catch and fill out the weird and spooky encyclopedia. Fishing at night gives you different and weirder fish, but it also raises your panic meter, which can cause hallucinations and open you up to monster attacks. It's a pretty ambiently scary game for the most part, and I almost chalked it up to being more horror themed than actual horror, until this one lagoon where a giant tentacle suddenly shot up at me out of a sudden drop in the ocean floor. I fuckin yelped, actually screamed in a way only two other games have gotten me to do this year.

5. Alien: Isolation (2014)

I have never, in my life, felt more powerless in a game than when I played Alien: Isolation. I'm used to games like Resident Evil, where you have a toolset for survival that is limited, but allows you to give actual pushback towards the zombies trying to get you. I played Amnesia: The Dark Descent this year too, the opposite of this dynamic, where you have NO means of resistance whatsoever, and the binary outcomes of monster encounters of that game completely broke my immersion.

Alien: Isolation actually gives you myriad crafted tools to overcome your obstacles, from human scavengers to androids to the xenomorph herself. Yet, the impossible speed and predatory senses of the monster means that one slip up means instant death, and the death animations are pretty brutal. Through cunning and cautious play, you can slip past the Alien enough times to where you get a flamethrower, which will repel her in a pinch. However, her AI is advanced to the point where she will learn your habits between deaths, look for you in lockers if you hide in them a lot, resist certain tricks like noisemaker bombs or flares. It's in keeping with how the 1979 movie presents her: a perfect killing machine. In fact, its the way so much of the Sevastopol resembles the aesthetic of that early film that not only helps the atmosphere, but makes the alien's power more believable. Immersive and terrifying, Alien: Isolation is a horror triumph.

4. Undertale (2015)

Yeah that's not actually a joke. I really did only play Undertale this year, and I was really actually completely blind going into it. Of all the games I'm happy I got to experience fresh, it was this one. Undertale seems tropey in its game design, story beats, and writing style 8 years later, but that's because so much of its design has been cannibalized by indie developers going after this aesthetic. As a bullet hell, it's...fine. As a meta commentary on retro RPGs and on the act of violence in video games in general, it's incredible. It legitimately gave me immense joy to reach the end and have my stubborn insistence on pacifism challenged even further, and then rewarded in the best possible way. I got to experience it on stream, too, with some friends who had played it previously and one who did not, and we all did the common thing and did funny voices for everybody. It's created some real cherished memories for me, memories that wouldn't have hit as hard if I did not wait to play Undertale.

3. Metal Gear Solid (1998)

Now here's a game I truly thought I'd never get around to. I'm a big fan of the Metal Gear series and when I learned that konami was releasing the master collection pack of the first 3 games, I was fuckin' stoked. If there's one other game that dictated the trajectory of storytelling and presentation of modern games like Half Life did, it's this one.

Having played the first two metal gears, the 2D ones from the late 80s, I was struck by how much of the basic design beats of Metal Gear come directly from the early titles. Seeing them translated into 3D is just incredible--all the prototypical stealth design transcribed so seamlessly into a much more legible visual language to me. The shooting may feel like ass and the bosses may have healthbars the size of Alaska, but the moment to moment sneaking in this game is so intricate and thorough that you really do feel like a tactical master as you go about it.

None of that touches on what's most memorable about Metal Gear Solid, and that's the presentational aspects. The animations and models might be worse than Half Life's, but the writing and voice acting is just world class. David Hayter as Snake, Cam Clarke as Liquid, Christopher Randolph as Otacon, and Patrick Zimmerman as Ocelot (hell even an early Jennifer Hale role) are astounding performances, even today. The cutscenes and dialogue are certainly oversaturated and long, but goddamn if I don't like watching and listening to them. I love this damn game.

2. Bloodborne (2015)

Bloodborne has been more of a myth and less of a game for me. I played some bits at a friend's house in 2017 and never owned a PS4 so I never thought playing it would be possible for me. I obsessively watched lore videos and playthroughs which got me into Dark Souls 3, then Sekiro, then Elden Ring, which has fueled much of my activity on twitch and as a game critic in general. It was only this year that that same friend lent me her PS4 and I played Bloodborne 3 whole times until I 100% the game in a matter of months. The experience was so meaningful to me that I ended up scrapping my first bloodborne video and starting from scratch, this time with Bloodborne Kart dev Lilith Walther as a guest.

I have never been more immersed in a game world than I have been in Bloodborne's. Yharnam is not only such a dense and intricate city, it is drop dead gorgeous in such a grotesque and macabre way. Many words and many writers have already described the surreal hypergothic smokescreen shrouding the insidious cosmic beings steering the terror and bloodshed from out of sight, so I won't repeat them here. You don't forget the sights and sounds of Bloodborne--they linger in your imagination, the visual language shapes your own ability to conceive of images and ideas in horror fiction, twisting the familiar into stranger shapes and forms.

Plus it just feels so fucking good to play. I like From Software titles and their style of combat, and I like how fast combat works in Sekiro and Elden Ring, but neither of those games accommodate brutality like Bloodborne does. You're meant to attack recklessly, cravenly, no blocking, just press the attack again and again until you're drenched in the gore and blood of your foes. You feel like one among the beasts--after all, what difference is there between a predator and the man that hunts them?

1. Signalis (2022)

I have not stopped thinking about Signalis since I played it the first time. The game is like a fucking honeypot for me. It's got Resident Evil style tank controls as an option, with similar combat and inventory management, themes and presentation similar to Silent Hill, and a sci fi flourish akin to Dead Space. So what, it's every great horror game jammed into one retro style amalgamation? Sounds like a great time for me!

That's just the surface, the hook of it all. While the game certainly uses this familiarity to pull you in and make you comfortable and excited for its own terrors, there's a creeping feeling of unease as you continue to revel in the horror and gore that's taken over these halls. Your character, Elster, is a special ops android in a fictional fascist regime, who has abandoned her post to search for her human partner, whose identity eludes her as she slips into delusion. After reaching the depths of the first area, where the space mine turns into a hall of flesh and viscera, the very walls pulsing and dripping, the world suddenly resets, and you find yourself back in the very first zone, now covered in the same blood and gore. The characters cry out in pain at you, begging you to stop, to turn back, to stop prolonging their hell with your own pursuit of an ending. A chalkboard in a classroom with a pretty frivolous note early on now reads "YOU'VE BEEN HERE BEFORE."

If I go on I'm gonna spoil the whole game, but that part there is the essence of Signalis to me. Many games will challenge your own enthusiasm for playing, question the time you spend in the game rather than like, going outside or something. Few games will actively blame you for prolonging the suffering of the game's inhabitants and creating a self contained digital hell. Few games will ask you "why do you want terror?" in the way that Signalis does.

Signalis is a triumph of horror game design. The imagery is horrifically cryptic, the worldbuilding is dense, the monster design and soundscapes are creepy and effective, the gameplay feels desperate and every bullet fired feels like a scream for help. Signalis is my favorite game I played this year, hands down.

[andreisvechnikov]

Andrei Svechnikov: A Primer

written October 5th, 2023

BASICS:

Born 26 March 2000 in Barnaul, Russia

Right winger on the Carolina Hurricanes (who drafted him 2nd overall in 2018)

6’2 and 195 lbs

Andrei’s first and foremost a family oriented person. One of the most important people in his life is his brother, Evgeny. He followed Evgeny everywhere, including to Michigan in 2016, where in juniors he played for the USHL’s Muskegon Lumberjacks; near Grand Rapids where Evgeny was playing for the Red Wings AHL affiliate. Svechnikov led the team in scoring and was named to the All-USHL Team and declared USHL Rookie of the Year. He then was selected first overall by the OHL’s Barrie Colts and later won the Emms Family Award as rookie of the year. After being selected 2nd overall by Carolina, he chose the number 37, the same as his brother.

On their childhood: 

“We didn’t have much money,” Evgeny said of their childhood in Siberian Russia. “We ate from the same plate. We did everything together.” “I’ve waited for this my whole life,” Andrei said, sweat still dripping. “It’s my dream. My dream came true.” “It’s huge,” Evgeny said of both the goal and their relationship. “It’s everything.” “They moved from job to job every city,” Evgeny said. “They sacrificed so much for us.” If you ask Evgeny, there was “no doubt” Andrei would make it from the time he started dominating older competition at 5 years old. Evgeny was 8 when he fostered that opinion. Clearly he was on to something. (X)

The brothers have a special handshake and Evgeny wears a bracelet Andrei gave him everyday.

In the NHL:

Andrei made NHL history being the first player to ever score a lacrosse style goal. Seen here.

And is the only player (so far) to do two successfully.

But he can do tricks off the ice too. His first few years on the Hurricanes, he enjoyed learning magic tricks. Here's one with former beat reporter Sara Civian.

Andrei is loved by many, if not most, current and former teammates, coaches, media, and more. 

Praise from others: 

“I’m just proud of the kid in general,” Brind’Amour said after his first win as coach and Svechnikov’s first point. “He’s a great kid. He wants to learn and he’s got a lot to learn, but he’s going to be a great player in this league. You gotta remember how young he is, and that’s something I have to keep reminding myself. He’s just a kid, and he’s out there in the NHL and he doesn’t look out of place. We’re very fortunate to have him.”

(X)

Former Muskegon Lumberjacks GM John Vanbiesbrouck once told me he didn’t want to drop a bomb too soon, but yeah, he could see hints of Gordie Howe in a young Svechnikov. Vanbiesbrouck was more comfortable with a comparison to Todd Bertuzzi. “You know what? He’s hard to compare to anyone because there’s not a lot of guys like him,” he said after Svechnikov’s NHL debut. “Because sometimes he drives the net or sometimes he’ll see a play. He’s so multi-talented. When he drives the net — Todd Bertuzzi, one of the best net-drivers I’ve ever seen. He’s got an acute way to make plays and find lanes and shoot in place. There’s not a lot of guys like him in that way and how he can play a speed game, then a slowed-down game.”

(X)

“We were just hoping, when we got the pick, that we would get someone who was a star,” Carolina owner Tom Dundon says. “And I think we did.” 

(X)

He is a gem. Always has time for everyone. Can’t wait to see him back in action next season for the canes - Justin Williams

(X)

Here's a snippet of a very heart felt interview the Svechnikov brothers gave before their first match up.

What’s his best quality as a person? Evgeny: Humble. Humble, shyness, respectful. There’s not just one word. But one thing (that) comes in my head, humble and respect(ful), of anything: parents, people around, polite. Just a good kid, man. He’s just a good kid. Andrei: I feel like he’s just a kind person — he’s always going to care about you, he’s always going to ask you if something’s wrong. He’s a culture guy. But obviously he gets a little emotional sometimes (laughter) … He’s gotta work on that a little bit, probably. When have you been the proudest of him? Evgeny: Just one thing? … That he doesn’t let himself get down, and anything happens, nothing stops him. But I think he learned that from me (laughs). And yeah, he doesn’t give up and he keeps going. Nothing bothers him, and he’s like a tractor, just keeps going, and I’m telling you, he learned that from me. Andrei: Every day, to be honest. Every day I am proud of him, to be completely honest. He’s been through a lot, there have been a lot of hard things. He was injured, now he’s here in the show. It’s going to be fun to play against him. I’m proud of him every day. Anything else you want to add about him? Evgeny: That I love him so much. He’s a great brother. Andrei: I don’t know, really — did he say anything interesting? The Athletic: He said he loves you so much and that you’re a great brother. Andrei: I love him so much, too. He is my hero.

Read the rest here.

A big mama's boy. (1)(2)

Friends on the team:

When he first joined the Hurricanes, Andrei became good friends with Dougie Hamilton and Warren Foegele. They all lived in the same building and new to the team. The Hurricanes even made a video of them hanging out and talking about their friendship called the “Three Amigos.”

Even after both Dougie and Warren were traded to other teams, he remains good friends with them. (X)

**Fun fact: Both Dougie and Warren had to pick new numbers with their new teams. Dougie, formerly #19, picked 7, (at the time, Pavel Zacha already took #37) and Warren, formerly #13,  picked 37.

Andrei has always been good friends with alternate captain, Jordan Martinook. Taken under Marty’s wing from the start in 2018 when they both joined the team, Jordan has a pre-game tunnel tradition to scream Andrei’s last name to hype them up. Martinook will occasionally add in other players but he always exaggerates ‘Mista Svechnikov’ the most. Like another older brother figure, Martinook enjoys messing with Andrei in practice and in general.

After Dougie and Warren were traded, Andrei became closer with Martin Necas. Always good friends, they started going out to eat together more and attended the US Open Men’s Final in 2023.

With Seth Jarvis joining the team, Andrei gained the opportunity to be the "big brother" for once. Pulling pranks and messing around with Jarvy.

Another player who’s allowed Andrei the opportunity to grow as a leader on the team is Pyotr Kochetkov, fellow Russian and a goalie. The two have become good friends, Andrei acting as a guide and translator. 

Andrei loves Carolina, and Carolina loves Andrei. One of the many reasons he agreed to an eight-year, $62 million contract with the Hurricanes in 2021.

Andrei has always loved animals. He’s good with both cats and dogs, looking forward to the annual calendar photoshoot, and adopting one of his own in 2023.

Andrei has never met a penalty box he didn’t like.

(1)(2)(3)(4)(5)

“I just love that style. Just hit hard, you know?,” Svechnikov said. “I think I’m playing a hard game, and that’s why I think I’m scoring goals. I’m gonna hit, then I’m gonna go to the offensive zone and someone’s going to give it to me and then I try and shoot it into the net. Good tries for me. I love that style of play.” (X)

He made the 2023 All Star Game, winning the Fastest Skater competition. The first person he called after was his brother.

He suffered a tear in his left ACL a couple months later, and missed the rest of the season and playoffs. However, he had fun sounding the siren and joining his good friends in the broadcast booth. He had a successful surgery and is recovering well, hoping to start the 2023-2024 season on the right foot.

[alchemistc]

i wanna start out by saying ive been patiently waiting for a hockey AU on the bucktommy fandom and your Goon fic is everything i have ever wanted, im honestly obsessed with your characterization of tommy

i have never been that big on rpf in the hockey fandom, but i always love reading people write crosby in their hockey aus, also love how you include Hockey Lore TM in the story

so, i wanted your take on the insane 'tradition' (not really tradition, more of a common occurrence) of players playing through injuries specially in the playoffs (I remember that in the 2016 or 2017 cup run, there was more players currently injured on the penguins than not, pretty sure Letang or Daley had like, broken fingers for most of the last round) and how many times Buck had to run away from Hen so he could play, because if anyone is more likely to play through injuries, i'd say is Evan "i-had-another-surgery-instead-of-waiting-for-my-leg-crush-injury-to-heal-naturally" Buckley, or Evan "I-sued-my-job-because-they-wouldnt-let-me-do-said-job-after-said-leg-crush-injury-and-vomitting-blood" Buckley

Thank you thank you! Goon has been so much fun to craft, and I'm loving seeing the hockey fans and the 'what's a chiclet' 9-1-1 fans alike enjoy it!

Personally? I hate it. I think the whole idea of it is fucking insane and detrimental to not only their physical health but their mental health as well. (From the Avs fan perspective, regardless of what we actually know about the Nichushkin situation, the man broke his foot and played through it, likely got addicted to a painkiller in the recovery process, missed a playoff series because of [redacted], had a career fucking year and then sent himself to the Players Assistance Program, came back, had MORE career highlights, and then...failed a drug test in the run up to the playoffs and got himself suspended.

(Another reason players just play through injury and mental health crisis is the Players Assistance Program, which IS ANOTHER MAJOR FAILING OF HOCKEY CULTURE IN GENERAL)

Hell, Landy played through a not-healed-injury after he took Cale's skate to his knee and now he's had two surgeries and may never make another appearance in a game because of it.

(I can't think of the player at the moment, but I remember a cup run where a player was playing with fractured ribs and it was later revealed that if he'd taken a puck or a nasty hit or gone into the boards wrong there was a chance he'd have had a vital organ punctured and likely wouldn't have known the extent of the damage until he'd collapsed from internal bleeding. It didn't happen, but WHAT THE FUCK)

And fans have a tendency to glorify them as gods for 'fighting through the pain' in their quest for the Cup.

As far as Goon goes:

They're all gonna be playing through injury. SInce this is from Tommy's perspective, he's coming at it from two angles - he's the guy who's played through injury his whole career just to keep a spot in the lineup, he's toughed it out and dealt with the numbing agents and the wraps and the twinge that doesn't go away for weeks at a time (and the aforementioned pain killers that eventually prompted him to go to fucking therapy in the first place). He is also the guy who has spent four years unpacking why exactly he did that - how much of it is the culture, how much of it is his own shit and his dad telling him to rub some dirt in it and stop being a pussy, how much of it has just been to prove himself capable of being one of the guys in the room.

There's also Hen, who pushes harder than the other trainers, and calls out the bullshit when she sees it, so yeah, this team probably has a slightly better track record of keeping the guy out with upper body injury out of the lineup for longer than any other team would, but - Buck's not the only one who's learned how to lie about exactly how much pain he's in and how well his recovery is going. He'll strain shit and refuse to admit it, he'll push through on a 'minor' injury unless he thinks playing on it would threaten his career. (He absolutely has NO real concept of how bad an injury actually is, tbh, because like everyone else he's been lying about it for so long he doesn't have an accurate pain scale.)

The tldr of this is that I don't condone it, but the reality is it's so ingrained in kids coming up that it's a reality of the culture and I'm not necessarily gonna shy away from that. It's not a huge focus of the story, but there will be hints here and there.

[riki-shenanigans]

what the enha members would do on their school computers 🤓 💻 📚

ALSO HELLO?? THEIR NEW RELEASE IS SO FREAKING GOOD. 😵 I literally needed this in my life. we fr starting the week off RIGHT

~

heeseung

- he’s def one of those people that bring a whole ass headset, mouse & mousepad to school

- he also knows all the commands to switching tabs and stuff like that

- he’s just a true gamer fr

- he plays the nyt sudoku with jay

- he also tries to help jake with the wordle but he mostly just types in gibberish hoping that it’s a word 😄

- him and ni-ki compete against each other in slope and try to get the highest score

- he’s really good at geometry dash and has passed all the levels

- he downloaded a sketchy vpn for the school laptop so he can play LoL and fortnite 😈

- one time an admin came up behind him and jump scared him while he was playing fortnite though

- he got his laptop taken away and he had to do all his assignments on paper for a week 😔

- but dw he downloaded the vpn again once he got a new computer

- in their shared minecraft server, heeseung always goes exploring with ni-ki

- they always fight any mob.. including hitting the villagers (they laugh so hard)

- he loves watching game hacks on youtube

- he’s prob really good at google snake

- he has played every mode and it’s just his go-to game

- him and ni-ki regularly try to beat each others wpm’s on monkey type (heeseung normally wins)

- he also loves playing basketball stars

jay

- for some reason he bought a laptop case for his school computer LOL

- he’s on his second computer though cuz he accidentally broke his first one tryna fold it into tablet mode..

- I think he would have all his bookmarks and files organized nicely

- he likes nyt games like jake but he mostly plays connections, the mini, and the sudoku

- he takes a really long time on the sudoku’s cuz he refuses to use autocomplete

- he LOCKS IN with sudoku and gets annoyed when heeseung gets it before him

- he won’t pay the subscription for the crossword though LOL

- jay is always mining & crafting in minecraft, as well as trading with the villagers

- he either watches cooking videos or game strategies on youtube

- he also loves minesweeper cuz he saw ni-ki playing it and decided to try it (he hasn’t looked back since)

- he would prob play poker unblocked against randos online

- occasionally he can convince everyone to play 8ball pool too!!

- google solitaire is one of his og games fr

- OH and he’d def have a chess.com account that he’s had since like 2016

- he’s super good and can beat most of the bots

jake

- him and ni-ki were prob fooling around one time and now his laptop screen is super cracked and on the top corner u can literally see the inside of the laptop

- his wallpaper is def layla

- he plays the most nyt games out of all the members

- he plays all the ones involving spelling like the wordle, the spelling bee, and the letter boxed

- he tries to convince the others to play but no one wants to (cuz he just has too big of an advantage lol) 😞

- he’s completed every fireboy and watergirl level with ni-ki (in every version too)

- btw he’s watergirl DUH 😛

- jake is def just playing with the animals in minecraft (he has a whole pack of wolves)

- but he also accompanies jay in mining and heeseung and ni-ki during their adventures

- he’s the only one that plays the pbs kids games but it’s ok cuz ANYTHING FOR THE WILD KRATT BROTHERS 🔥🙏💯

- he prob watches gaming streams on youtube and has the funniest reactions

- he would also watch those building a primitive house in the woods with sunghoon HAHA

- every year that there’s the fifa world cup, him and ni-ki are always updated and they watch the matches during class (learning can wait)

- him and ni-ki prob play baseball 9 during boring ass lectures

- no DOUBT he plays subway surfers LMAOO

sunghoon

- first thing he does when he opens his school computer is look at himself in the reflection of the black screen LOL

- he has to make sure his hair is looking good (it always is)

- just to fool the others, he switches the letter keys on his keyboard LMAO

- he’s def one of those students that doesn’t have anything bookmarked or organized and just types in the name of the website everytime he needs it

- the only nyt game he plays is tiles because it’s so rewarding for him when he finishes it perfectly

- he’ll get really mad if he messes up his streak though

- he starts playing run 3 cuz of jungwon

- (although it takes him awhile to complete the stages)

- sunghoon wears the default steve skin in minecraft and proud of it 😜

- he willingly collects resources for everyone

- like mining with jay and jake

- and chopping down trees for sunoo’s builds

- sometimes he gets bored and just moves around the items in the chests over and over again

- he is mesmerized by the youtube primitive house building videos and the channel.. when he found out they were fake he was devastated LMAO

- he’ll always watch kdramas with sunoo on pirating websites too ☺️

- google pacman is prob his fave game

- sometimes he plays temple run and jake always tries to tell him that subway surfers is better

sunoo

- I bet he decorates his laptop with cute stickers hehe

- he loves taking pictures with the other members on the laptop camera

- he will make short vlogs on the camera too!!

- I think he’d have a pretty google wallpaper with all those cool google extensions

- his favorite game is probably papa’s scooperia and is amazing at remembering which customers ordered which order

- sunoo is always building those aesthetic cottages in minecraft

- he def has those pretty texture packs

- he makes everyone stop what they’re doing while he gives a tour of his builds

- he loves watching mukbang vids on youtube

- him and ni-ki are the only ones that play roblox on the school computer LOL

- he’s literally the highest level in dress to impress‼️sunoo don’t come to play.

- sunoo is the one who finds all the pirating websites 💀

- everytime one gets taken down or blocked he just finds another one HELP

- school can’t get in the way of watching new kdrama eps that come out 🙄

- he probably goes online shopping and browsing a lot

- always adding to the cart but never actually buying anything (so real for that)

- OMG he would totally play the cupcake 2048 game too

jungwon

- he’s the only member who was able to keep one laptop throughout the whole year (the other members are prob on their second or third laptop)

- he prob has group tabs for every subject

- he has organized bookmarks like jay but he def overdoes it and has bookmark GROUPS with groups inside of those groups

- he always locks in for blooket and is millions ahead of the others at the end LOL

- he plays the nyt strands even though he doesn’t understand what the words means 😭

- he just connects random letters and can somehow figure it out..

- he’s really good at run 3 and has all the characters!!!

- he also got sunghoon onto it

- jungwon has those super realistic but also creepy minecraft packs

- everyone freaks out when they see his screen

- he also has the alex skin by accident but he lowkey fucks w it

- he doesn’t mind cheating sometimes with the admin commands 😉

- jungwon ALWAYS plays smoothed brown noise during class cuz he said it helps him focus..

- he got everyone else hooked on it though and everyone expects him to play it

- he prob watches youtube shorts on the school computer 😭😭

- he always has cookie clicker open

- he made a chess.com account to play with jay even though he always loses

- sometimes he wins without realizing the genius play he made and surprises both jay and himself

- he gets really anxious about getting caught using his phone at school so he plays the computer ver of the watermelon game 😇

- he prob plays motox3m a lot too

- he’s GOATED at flappy bird btw

ni-ki (riki)

- first of all, he MOST DEFINITELY has those obnoxious looking big-ass custom mouse cursors LMAO

- and his computer is literally never charged and he has to ask the other members to borrow their chargers

- I wouldn’t be surprised if he always had a countdown tab open that counted the amount of days until school is over 😭

- he always has the goofiest kahoot names that makes the class crack up when he wins 1st place

- he finished all the nyt vertex’s and memorized how to complete them

- he still replays them though!!

- he’s the only one that plays costcodle but he loves it ☺️

- he likes playing slope against heeseung and going ontop of the tunnels

- his favorite papa’s game is either papa’s sushiria or papa’s freezeria

- he replays the fireboy and watergirl levels with jake but he always forgets to press the button for him 😔

- his fave game is DEF duck life 😊😊

- he always plays it during his free time and during class time LMAO

- he is literally never in the normal world in minecraft

- his first instinct when joining is to create a nether portal and to go fight the mobs 😄

- he’s also a pro at beating the ender dragon

- jake convinced him to play wild kratts with him but he gets addicted to the odd squad games instead 😭

- he loves watching asmr slime vids on youtube (especially the cloud slimes!! he finds it so satisfying)

- he def trolls 5 year olds in adopt me 💀

- he also secretly plays royale high and roleplays in the old campus..🤫

- him and jake always get in trouble for yelling and shouting while watching the fifa world cup 😪

- he got jay hooked onto minesweeper

- he’s really good at it too 😮‍💨 the hard maps are light work for him

- even though he literally has a phone he likes connecting his airpods to his school computer and playing spotify from there

- he’s the one who found monkey type but he can never beat heeseung’s wpm 😖

- sometimes he purposefully turns off his wifi so he can play the google dinosaur game

- him and jake always play baseball 9 that it’s literally bookmarked on his computer

~

LOVE U THANKS FOR READING BABE 😚🙂‍↕️💓

ummm elephant in the room.. I haven’t posted since christmas LMAO 😄😆😂🤣🥲.. I wrote the lost school ID story for fun and didn’t expect it to get any traction,,,, BUT YALL ATE THAT SHIT UP AND UR COMMENTS AND REBLOGS WERE SO SWEET OMG.!!! i’m definitely not a writer so I only post when something comes to mind so that’s why i’ve come back to post this ☺️ I hope u guys enjoyed and had some good giggles el o ellll BYE

[viva-blur21]

Hey everyone!:>

It's time to officially announce my own AU, which is inspired by the legendary game Five Nights at Freddy's and AU of the same legendary artist who contributed a lot to this franchise, Mobox87...

Yeah...

Yes, I know that she turned out to be not good person, and not all people support her. Personally, my opinion about her is ambiguous. I can't say anything good or bad about her, 'cause I've only heard about all this, so... All I can say that her fnaf animations and her old drawings from 2014-2016 were very inspiring to a young me back then.

I loved all her characters, who were almost no different from each other and were the same, but then I didn't give it much significance. I just enjoyed it.

Her videos triggered many emotions in me, with some inspiring, surprising, and even traumatizing me (like the video 'Death at Freddy's', where Vincent, purple guy and the old version of William Afton, kills children)... And there were other many things that I loved and did not understand in these simple, hastily drawn animations by that young girl who was Mobox at that time...

Anyways she is a legend for me (for me personally, I can't speak for others :)) since she created my childhood, and I think not just mine, but many others, and maybe someone even knew about fnaf through her animations.

Also she played a significant part in my art and drawing. Thanks to her works I developed in this and still continue to do this (and as you may have noticed, my style is inspired by hers).

Of course, she had many other projects and stories that I don't know much about, or about which I absolutely know nothing. Only her fnaf AU caught my eye more than anything else (since then I was a big fan of fnaf).

All those warm memories of FNAF and what was in those years, of course, will include Mobox's works also. Even today, watching her old fnaf videos, I feel a bit joy and a big tear of nostalgia, and continue to see in them that mystery and dark atmosphere in some way that I experienced when I was young and it still feels for me... In them, I see, to some extent, the potential and something truly unique, not just some scribbles. And yeah, I'm talking about exactly about her old animations from 2014-2016.

It's precisely because of nostalgia and in an attempt to plunge into the past a bit I create my own AU. Mobox's old AU from 2015 to 2016 that's where my inspiration came from.

And also AU applies to the first four fnaf games).

So, why not to go back in time and experience the carefree, fun and warm-hearted time, that we all love so much?

Anyways, if you are interested in my AU and in all that has been visiting my poor little head for a long time, welcome to my little world. I will be so glad if you like it and you stay to follow this blog further.

Welcome, dear guests. I really hope that you will like this place:3

PS: There I want to tell a completely different, own story, which I really hope you will accept with warmth, I will also post different stuff related to the characters there (both lore and just drawings and more). If you want to ask a question to a blog or a character, feel free to ask. There will be answers, but it takes time (please be understanding, I may need time to answer your questions, so don't get upset if your answers come later, I warned you, thank you for understanding ❤️‍🩹)

[7grandmel]

Todays rip: 14/03/2024

My Dr. Eggman Can't Be This Evil!

Season 1 Featured on: 7 Somari Dad Also on: Your Onii​-​Chan's Favorite Rips!

Ripped by Smoky

Look: It's a point I've made before and a point I won't needlessly harp on about, so let's get it out of the way: Season 1 of SiIvaGunner was, as most firsts tend to be, far simpler than what we'd get just a year or two later and beyond. But it was before SiIvaGunner came to be known for its lovingly crafted and detailed mashups like Hella Pummel, before the ludicrously in-depth projects like my rip :), before we'd start getting delicately authentic melodyswaps like Outertale of much of any original covers or compositions like Trial of the Heart. Back when the very idea of disguising video game music edits as normal, unedited music rips, was still something really novel. The novelty of the channel paired, with a lack of basically any set-in-stone recurring jokes other than Grand Dad, resulted in some true classics like Pikmin Park, Live and Ooooooooooooooh, Dr. Soulja - and, of course, My Dr. Eggman Can't Be This Evil!.

Now, let's start with a bit of a disclaimer - there's obviously a whole bunch of baggage to unpack with the humor surrounding the Your Onii​-​Chan's Favorite Rips! album in general. 2016 was the absolute plateau of edgy YouTube humor being in the mainstream, right before LeafyIsHere, iDubbbz, Keemstar, Filthy Frank and all the others sort of petered out from YouTube's stricter moderation. It was, in no uncertain terms, the time where making fun of how weird anime could be was at its most trendy. The joke in My Dr. Eggman Can't Be This Evil!, and the joke of almost all the rips featured in Your Onii​-​Chan's Favorite Rips!, is to reference the anime franchise Oreimo, one that's effectively built entirely around the theme of being attracted to your younger sister. Despite its incestuous contents, the series sports a poppy, happy-go-lucky, bubbly aesthetic - hence, prime material to make jokes about how bizarre it is for Japan to effectively glorify such taboo relationships. Now, this is far from the only risque topic that early SiIvaGunner chose to tackle, and even back then there were topics such as described in Stickerbrush State of Mind that were still seen as going "too far" - but many of those have faded away as distant memories overtime, rips which failed to gain much of any traction, only really remembered as an edgier footnote in the channel's legacy.

So then...what makes My Dr. Eggman Can't Be This Evil! any different, worth highlighting here today?

Put simply, I don't believe its million-plus views come purely from Oreimo fans, or from people deep in the trenches who find references to weird anime to be inherently funny. I believe the views are there because of a far simpler, far more effective joke in play: the contrast between a song as bubbly as Oreimo's opening theme irony, and the vocals of E.G.G.M.A.N. and the character its attached to, is simply very funny. The original E.G.G.M.A.N. is sort of an industrial rock "anthem", where the titular doctor celebrates and glorifies his own destructive goals in a theatrical, self-aggrandizing, yet still aggressive way - an aggression that feels as if it disappears entirely without the track's original instrumentation. An aggression that, with the instrumentation replaced with the sugary sweetness of irony, turns into something purely theatrical, like a performance from a School Idol, a performance from the heart - which, given who Dr. Eggman is as a character, is obviously a very funny mental image. Pikmin Park was listed as one of the classic Season 1 rips above for good reason - it, too, plays on this same sort of contrast in songs used for a mental image that's simply too good not to get a chuckle out of.

Thing is, while Stickerbrush State of Mind was fondly remembered for just how much of a genuine banger it was, while Pikmin Park is considered a classic due purely to how well its joke works, I believe My Dr. Eggman Can't Be This Evil! succeeds above both of them due to mastering both sides of the coin. It's already very funny as a concept due to the contrast in songs used, yet a similar BPM and excellent mashup work by Smoky makes the rip an incredibly fun rip to just listen to as a good piece of music, vocals and instrumentation working in harmony far better than they probably should. It is, in that sense, a shining example of SiIvaGunner's biggest strength, the ability to make its viewers smile both from its jokes and from the surprise of hearing good music. It's the perfect harmonization of two jokes, preserving the strengths of E.G.G.M.A.N's vocals whilst using every piece of irony possible to highlight this new cutesy feel - a deceptively simple joke executed perfectly, transcending the dicey origins of its conception and becoming far funnier in a completely different way.

[front-facing-pokemon]

hello everyone, nose rater here.

i got terminated

OH NO!!!

oh! phew :)! never mind

i used to. back when it first came out, during the Summer Of Pokémon Go, as everybody calls it. in 2016 or so. but it lost its luster quick, in my opinion. i care more about the Actual pokémon games as opposed to like. a microtransaction-y mobile game where you just. throw. balls. and the battles are just. tapping. maybe it's gotten more depth since then, but as far as i'm aware, i'm not super interested. i played it until they added the backpack size limit, which used to not be there, and then i had like 500 out of 200 in my backpack and could never get any more items unless i trashed like 300 poké balls, which i was not about to do

i've seen this sentiment a couple times now that i said it. which, personally, i never really saw until now. but i kinda like my interpretation better this time actually. i feel like it makes more sense to be a virus. if it was a sea mine i'd expect, like… fire-type. i almost said blast-type. can you tell what game i've been playing a lot of recently

had to google what this is and i have to say. i do not like it

of course..! o7! been going strong for long enough, now, ain't no reason to stop!

so many times. soooo many times i've seen that comment. i've been seeing this comment since i started this blog all those years ago. i've read this phrase probably hundreds of times since i started this blog. it's crazy. sometimes folks even leave reblog comments just saying this. it's amazing how long a single joke can stick around, and how novel it can seem if you're not the one reading the notes on this blog

this isn't to be an asshole. but it is to say that i'm adding one to the very long tally. i remember making a post about this that was just a compilation of folks saying this. a whiiile back. and i thought that would be the end of it

i was wrong

keep up the good work, guys. maybe one of these days i will have games on my phone

today i learned! i feel like the names i don't understand from gen 1 are very easily googleable at this point. to be honest. they've been around for long enough and the pokémon company weren't even a thing yet so i find it hard to imagine they were making super complex names and designs back then

[natsumiheart]

Ever since I met you.

…Hello world! Lmao

Hi, I'm Natsumi, and I'm wondering who is even reading this but if you are, welcome to a very long post about how I got into Tears of Themis, how it helped me through such a hard time, and how I ended up falling in love with a certain detective.

I made this post for an event on hoyolab but I’m posting it here too in my trashcan! I already wanted to have a post documenting this online just for myself, even if in the future I cringe while reading it, I can look back and remember the emotions I felt through the year. I also wanted to share it with the world so that maybe people will feel like me, or come to appreciate this character that I love so much as much as I do. (you’re free to reblog btw!)

Warning: This post is mostly about Luke!

It contains spoilers about some Luke cards and some spoilers for his Blossom Chapter. There are small scenes from episodes 2 and 5 of main story as well. Oh, and Artem and Luke 2nd anniversary cards.

If you are here because you’re interested in learning or reading more about Luke and do not care much for the rest, I recommend the interlude, part 6, and The end: part 1. The other parts also talk about Luke and his stories but those are the most important in my opinion.

Due to Tumblr’s 30 image per post limit, this will be divided into 3 parts, each part added with a reblog.

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Index because this post ended up incredibly long so here are the parts laid out to read anything you’re interested in!

> Part 1: Introduction

(How did I learn about this game?)

> Part 2: Contact

(Getting the game)

> Part 3: The Beginning

(Starting the game and first impressions lol)

> Part 4: Falling

(FOR LUKE AHAH)

> Interlude: Luke Pearce’s Fear

> Part 5: Obsession

(How and why did this obsession start?)

> Part 6: Reflection

(Thinking back on Luke’s personality that attracted me)

> The end: Memories

(Extra memorable moments)

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Part 1: Introduction

I play Genshin (shocker) and I have some online friends who play it as well, so when Tears of Themis came out globally since it's made by Hoyoverse as well, most people who played genshin went to check it out. I discovered Tears of Themis through those people, and I was recommended the game by my online friends.

What was my response?

“I have no phone storage.” AAHAHAH, yes. I'm not a day one player. I only started during the second anniversary because back when the game came out despite being interested I could not play because I did not have any device that could handle the game. My phone could not handle Genshin's size either, it's not compatible to begin with- I played Genshin on the PlayStation [emoji]

However I did not forget about the game, I was just hoping that somehow one day, a miracle will happen and I will be able to play mobile games like other people LOL but what are the odds of that happening?... Well, a miracle happened 2 years later.

Bonus: I had a little beef at the time with Artem because I kept thinking drawings of him were actually of Jumin who is a very well written character I love like crazy from mystic messenger since 2016 BWAHAHA

Every masterpiece.. has its cheap copy.. IM JKJK PUT THAT KNIFE DOWN AHAHA

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Part 2: Contact

So one day I was visiting my aunt's house and met my cousin's acquaintance. I met the guy for like.. only 2 hours and during those hours my cousin told him about how I draw digitally but I have been drawing on an 8 year old phone that stays alive for like 30 mins at a time AHHAHA

The guy was like “That's it, I'm getting you an iPad to draw on.” I laughed, thinking he was joking- but then 2 days later I received TWO iPads, one for me and one for my little sister! W t f. Angels do exist on earth? And I was never able to thank him in person because he's a busy guy who only visited my village and I never saw him again o.o

Can you guess what I started doing when I got it? Download a bunch of games I wanted to try throughout the years but couldn't! Among them was Tears of Themis. My house didn't have the best Internet and had a couple hours of electricity a day so I downloaded it very slowly at my aunt's house.

I remember so clearly about how I sat next to my sister as I was downloading the game, and it started playing the second anniversary promotion video since it was starting during that time. At first I was like “aww, they proposing!” but suddenly things turned spicy and I almost dropped the iPad from my hand HAHA.

I did not know what to expect going into this game because I stayed away from spoilers and videos about it since I knew I wanted to get into it myself one day (I was interested in the main story). It made me sad too to be honest because I wanted to play it but couldn't, so I avoided it for years.

I however, did not expect at all that the game would get THAT spicy LMAO my sister noticed my reaction and she was like “What's up?” And I was like “you cannot see this” though she is older than the game’s age rating AHAHHA

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Part 3: The beginning

I was so excited getting into this game! When I started I was incredibly hooked to the main story, and at the time.. hear this.. I had a bias towards Artem because he looked like Jumin AHAHA

I was honestly more interested though in the main story than the boys, because the boys didn't make me feel much at the time- I do not have a “love at first sight” I never had that kind of experience for real life people or fictional people. (Anyone can experience it, and that's valid! It's just for me personally that never happens.)

After knowing characters and learning more about them, that's when sometimes- I fall in love with them as a character, they end up giving me so much happiness just seeing them, they give me comfort.. And they fill up my sketchbooks HAHA is this love romantic? Usually no, that's very rare!

I did not feel much for Artem (turns out the only thing he and Jumin have in common were their looks and being socially awkward, shocker-) but I had a little interest that led to me pulling for his second anniversary card when I started being able to wish. I lost- and got a standard Artem, but then I won and got his card LMAO you can get a lot of wishes starting off. However I was doing the stories of the standard SRs, along with the main story and someone.. someone was warming up a lot to my heart.

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Part 4: Falling

The boys were all very interesting and lovely characters! (The NPCs as well!!)

Artem, despite how he comes off at work, is actually just a shy guy who is bad at communication outside of work.

Vyn is actually a very interesting and well written character being very different than the rest of the cast due to his unique upbringing (honestly? His family feels like a cult, bro literally is running from a cult) and you learn more about his own psychology the more you get to know him.

Marius is literally just an artist who wants to chase the life he wants but is hindered by responsibility and his position.

And Luke- Luke stole my heart LOL

First off, he's a detective and I've already confessed online to having a thing for detectives by a drawing- that starting since I was a kid and I watched detective conan🧍‍♀️his introduction chapter.. was very interesting. It was literally the first episode, Rosa clearly knows and cares about this character right off the bat you're like hmm? What was this guy doing for 8 years? Why did he show up now after so long? Almost making him suspicious even. But he and Rosa seemed so close despite it all.

After that Luke had started showing up in the story here and there, a moment that made me go “ohh.. what a cool guy.” Was when after Marius’ case in episode 2, he shows up on a bike like “get in we outta here” and saved her from all the reporters.

His theme plays at this scene.. my heartttt

Revealing he'd been watching her and the case from afar and was literally waiting for her to get out and get her away.

I started reading the standard SRs, the first one I did was “Among the great blue” which honestly I recommend everyone doing again because I bet you all do not remember Luke saying this about Jellyfish

The card made me go *the rock eyebrow raise* GAHAH and at the time I was all innocent, not knowing anything about what Luke was going through, so when Rosa woke up and did not find him sleeping next to her (after she invaded where he's supposed to be sleeping lmao) and Luke was hunched over like “I'm fine I just accidentally swallowed gum lol” I actually believed him 💀 there were signs, but it would fly over a player's head until things are revealed ON THE FIRST FREAKING ACT OF HIS PERSONAL STORY and suddenly everything makes sense. Wow.

When I started personal story, I was just starting it because starting all of them is part of the “Rookie tasks” event you get when you start the game. Only to be punched in the gut immediately.

This is LITERALLY what you’re greeted with when you start his story 💀

I was starting to warm up to this guy and you're telling me.. he's sick and planning to leave us.. omg.

I got to choose one limited SR from the Rookie event, and I thought Luke looked adorable so I picked his card "A star in the palm" and the story.. omg that card, I'm weak. Everyone needs to see it, READ IT!

It’s illegal to be BOTH handsome and adorable smh

After that I started WANTING to do more Luke stories so I did the other standard SRs “Radiant Sunlight”, “Timely Rescue”, “Inner Sanctum”. They were all so good, my favorite being Inner Sanctum for how much it messed with my heart.

Dude is literally falling and he STILL makes sure to protect her.

I- was dying. I started pulling for Luke's anniversary card, starting to regret my choice going for Artem's. But he wouldn't come-

So I went back to main story because that's how you get the most schips, and guess what- I had reached episode 5…

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Interlude: Luke Pearce’s Fear

The way episode 5 starts, Luke joins the NXX and Rosa is incredibly surprised seeing him there introducing himself as an agent from the NSB. Meanwhile Luke… is mad.

At first he can't believe Artem would even make her do this but she confirms to him that it was her decision, and then he spills the truth about his identity, and about where he's been the past 8 years. He apologizes, for lying, for planning to leave her again, for everything.

And then this happens.

You guys, this scene made me go straight up insane. You can tell how much he had cared and loved her for all these years, and how his biggest fear is literally the main character getting hurt or something happening to her. I felt so emotional over it, that after this act I started DESPERATELY pulling for his card and I finally- finally got it

Episode 5 BTW is one of my favorites in the main story, it is 3 parts because it's THAT good. It's when people will start seeing what Luke is as a character, what's beneath the surface you see in episode 1. (Also this episode introduced the best character: Hugh Moss AHAHH)

The parallel between Rosa, and Jasmine (the reporter whose case you investigate), was not lost on me. That reporter died trying to expose the truth which is exactly what Rosa has been trying to do. I think the entire chapter literally is showing you why Luke is so scared of her continuing the path she's in.

But you know what's the best part? He's freaking terrified, yet he never forces her to leave. He says this:

People keep saying Luke is a red flag that keeps trying to control Rosa and her actions and I swear my reaction is always “Are you even paying attention?” Luke never forces Rosa, he only shows he's against it, but he always says he will support her whatever decision she makes.

A similar more light-hearted situation is the story of his summer card “Iridescent Heartbeat” where Luke is afraid of Rosa getting hurt or doing things that are too much for her so he doesn't consider doing things such as Bungee jumping or rafting. But Rosa insists that she wants to do it and when she's visibly afraid later, Luke teases her a bit (LOL)

but then holds her close to him and soothes her saying there's nothing to be afraid of cause he's there.

He encourages her to do what she wants! And when she does indeed get hurt because the rope was too tight around her leg, he does NOT put the blame on her, but on himself-

Y'ALL HOW IS THIS GUY CONTROLLING??

(The scene after kinda got on my nerves cause Rosa got “angry” that he’s not his usual “cheerful self” like girl I love you but please- can’t you see how much you getting hurt affects him? She pretends that she’s angrier than she actually is making Luke apologize over and over like 💀 but tbh it was also funny, I don’t like how she handled it but it was funny lol)

When they go rafting Luke lets Rosa take the lead and he will follow her because she wanted to prove to him that he doesn't need to plan everything, however Rosa's plan backfires, things go horribly wrong and she can't figure out how to get the raft to go straight. Luke again, does not reprimand her in any way and only helps her so she can do what she wants. Later on even after they've fallen off the raft and onto the water he immediately holds her and takes her up to the surface so worried like “are you okay???” And despite all that, he says she's right. That she's always right and he will stop trying to plan and go more with the flow. 

Luke never tried to control Rosa, he just loves her so much that he does not want to ever see her in pain or sad. He wants her to be the happiest girl in the world.

So who is Luke? Luke is the coolest mf, a guy that always jumps into action to help others with a heart so damn big that his own emotions slowly destroy him. He has felt an astronomical amount of guilt and regret since childhood- and has cared for and loved the main character just as long. The girl who is the reason he was able to keep his sanity, the girl who he always wanted to protect, and the girl who is the reason he is still here today. 

I wholeheartedly believe that without Rosa in his life, Luke would've ended up completely different, if still alive at all.

Bonus: I remember people being like, the characters have gemstones that match their color in the proposal ring, so why does Luke have Ruby instead of something like Topaz? This is why.. the ruby in the ring represents Rosa (getting emotional over here omg) and honestly that ring is freaking insane because not only did he design and make it and its box by himself for years.. but a ruby is inside the key that Rosa gave to him.

Remember how Luke when you click on the key in visit says “I wear it like this to have it as close as possible to my heart” now look at the key.. if the Ruby is Rosa, and Luke’s heart is the key, do you see what he conveyed in that ring? Yea, I’m crying too. 

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Part 5: Obsession

I have a bit of an obsession problem, I've been obsessed with stories, games, or characters and that obsession can last years of my lifetime. And it's understandable, when you're going through terrible things in your life, you get attached to what makes you feel happy and you hold on to that feeling. That's what starts that obsession.

When I got the second anniversary Artem card I did the story immediately and it was.. it was alright. Artem wants to propose, but in his attempt to keep it all secret distances himself too much and gets Rosa worried, but then wow! He proposes with the help of his coworkers and happy ending + things get a bit spicy at the end. 

But I felt like.. like I'm getting deja vu AHAHA like I've seen this kind of story a million times before. (Probably cause I did from watching a bunch of kdramas and having consumed a bunch of stories from a lot of media) It did not exactly get me to feel anything much, I'm sure it's different for Artem stans though having him propose after probably following his story for 2 years XD good on you guys have fun with your mans! 

For me though who had just started, it did not have that much of an effect. After I got the Luke anniversary card I was excited and went into the story oh so innocently not knowing back then that Luke cards are honestly heart wrenching. 

It led to me crying in bed while the sun was rising from the window as Luke says “That's because I love you.”

The way how he blocks the wind from her and lets it hit him instead at that exact moment is freaking PEAK writing.

That card showed me a lot more about this man who is so shackled by his own emotions and circumstance, that he's willing to sacrifice everything even his own wants and dreams for the one he loves.

Have you guys seen that one official art with Rosa posing as Themis? And the boys are represented by the objects around her? Luke is the sword, Artem is the balance, Vyn is the blindfold, and Marius is the snake by her leg.

It starts to make sense why Luke is holding onto her sword to the point of bleeding, he's bleeding yet he looks up to her in absolute devotion not caring for what happens to him and his eyes are only always on her. He’s willing to be her sword, to take all of the pain and protect her so she can be happy.

My life.. has not been what is considered “normal”. I'm not going to give my backstory in this post aHAHAH but at the time when I started Tears of Themis I was going through a very bad point in my life where I was close to have given up completely on my future and accepted my fate as it is. I had shut down completely, and I went back to becoming a shut-in which is honestly something I went through for four years before, it wasn't good. 

When you reach that point, you start becoming apathetic to everything.

Luke however, somehow started making me start having emotions again. Reading and learning about this character was actually affecting me in a way I have not been affected in a long time. He felt.. real, like I could feel his emotions, his love, his despair.

And that's part of why I got so attached to him and he became my comfort, because of him, I started to feel human again.

AHA CRINGE. OK enough with the sadness.

But I'll never forget how much Luke and Tears of Themis helped me keep a grip during those hard months. I'm in a better place now, it's not good- but it's better, and I still just open this game and visit Luke to help me ground myself.

One time after a bad day I accidentally touched him and he said this, I went insane-

I think that says a lot about the state of my sanity AHAHAH 

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[To be continued in reblog]