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ak-vintage · 4 months ago

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Quarry - Chapter 20

Pairing: Din Djarin (The Mandalorian) x f!reader

Summary: Din Djarin is on what he expects to be his last bounty hunt for Greef Karga. After all, Nevarro is swiftly moving away from its previous reputation as a Guild member’s paradise, and Din has more important concerns now, like finding a Jedi to train his mysterious foundling. However, after capturing a wanted starship engineer who would rather go anywhere other than “home,” the Mandalorian is forced to reassess his priorities.

Your taste of freedom had been brief but glorious. Now you are a prisoner of the most infamous bounty hunter in the Outer Rim – it’s only a matter of time before he turns you in. There isn’t much you would not do to keep from being sent home, but as you find yourself growing closer to your captor and his strange little companion, you start to wonder whether escape is really what you want.

Set after Chapter 13: The Jedi but before Chapter 14: The Tragedy.

Chapter Tags & Warnings: 18+ MDNI! Reader is Mando's live-in starship engineer, second-person POV, no use of Y/N, minimal descriptors of reader character, angst, canon-typical violence and peril

Series Masterlist | Read on AO3

Note: Following along with the canon timeline, this chapter overlaps heavily with the events of the season 2 episode "Chapter 15: The Believer." You will notice borrowed dialogue and synced plot points.

---

“I did an initial scan of the planet.”

In the dim light of the navigation room, Boba Fett swiped through the holographic display hovering above the console. With his helmet tucked militantly under his arm, the pale blue image cast shadows along this rugged face. You watched as the holoprojector shifted from a three-dimensional rendering of the planet Morak to show the harsh, duracrete exterior of a mining facility constructed right along the edge of a massive waterfall. Pointing at the structure, he rasped, “This is what you’re talking about, right?”

The full crew compliment of the Firespray hovered around the console, each of you feeling a bit more sober, a bit more serious than you had in days as the reality of what you were about to do began to set in.

You were going to invade a remnant Imperial base. With a team of six.

“Yeah, that’s the refinery right there,” Mayfeld confirmed with a nod.

Fennec shifted on her feet, her expression grave as she examined the holo-rendering. “Wonder what they’re refining in there?”

“Looks like rhydonium.” Boba frowned. “Highly volatile and explosive.”

The inmate scoffed and crossed his arms over his chest, as usual unable to remain somber for very long. “Yeah, kinda like this one, huh?” he snickered, nodding in Cara’s direction.

You swore you could hear your eyes roll at his tasteless joke, but otherwise, the comment was met with silence. Both Boba and the marshal hit him with withering stares, while Fennec and Din appeared committed to pretending like they hadn’t heard him. Mayfeld grimaced then shrugged at you, as if to say, “Well, you can’t win them all.”

“They have anti-aircraft cannons protecting it,” Boba said, pointing out the armaments stationed on the roof of the facility.

Fennec nodded. “And a full platoon of security forces.”

Your stomach tightened, and you swallowed thickly against a wave of unease.

Okay, correction, you thought. You were going to invade a remnant Imperial base with a full compliment of troops and a robust defense system. With a team of six.

While tension seemed to be high among everyone else in the room, Din appeared…shockingly calm. Not at ease, exactly, but rather focused, centered, determined. He seemed more himself to you in that moment than he had in weeks, since that disastrous day on Tython, as though finally having a goal in front of him – something to do – had brought him a sense of purpose that he had been lacking. Something about that stillness, that confidence calmed you, eased the way for your breath in your chest. There was no one in the galaxy you trusted more than him. If he felt good about your chances, then so did you.

“So, we go in quiet,” he said simply, steadily. “Let’s go get a closer look.”

---

Boba set the Firespray down a handful of kilometers away from the refinery, nestling the ship in a snug little clearing on a rainforest-covered hillside, and after a short trek to the top of that hill, the group of you set up a stake-out of sorts, using the height and remoteness of your vantage point to observe the mining operations. It wasn’t long before you determined that the refinery was supplied with shipments of rhydonium from the mines to the south, and the shipments were delivered at regular intervals using long, segmented vehicles that from this distance looked more like caterpillars than mining transports. Each segment featured two massive, chain-covered tires, which had worn a well-defined path through the rainforest, digging deep grooves in the rich soil through overuse. The surrounding forest had clearly been decimated to make way for these makeshift roads, and dead trees and shredded vegetation lined the edges. The unnaturalness of the sight set your teeth on edge.

Once it became clear how the rhydonium made its way into the refinery, a plan began to form. You would need to disable one of these mining transports while it was out of sight of anyone tracking its progress, and two people from your group would need to replace the troopers inside. Thankfully, there was a tunnel nearby where the road cut straight through a steep hillside, so that part of the operation should be fairly simple to achieve.

What was not quite so simple, however, was determining exactly who would be replacing the transport’s two-person crew.

At first, it was Mayfeld and Cara, but then Cara was nixed because of her alliance with the New Republic. Her genetic signature was on their register, and apparently these sorts of facilities were equipped with security technology that would sense it and trip the alarm. When Fennec was proposed as an alternative, she confessed that she was wanted by the Imperial Security Bureau and would, therefore, trip the security net, as well.

Boba, of course, was a no-go, as well, as his face and his voice were so well-known that his true identity would immediately be detected, regardless of his genetic signature. And you? Well. No one even mentioned the possibility of you accompanying Mayfeld into the refinery.

You supposed it was just as well – your marksmanship was still spotty at best, and a few weeks of hand-to-hand combat lessons did not a competent fighter make, so if things went south, you truly would be a liability more than a support. Still, you couldn’t help but feel a bit sore over the whole thing, not at your friends but at yourself.

It had never been more apparent that you were cut from a different cloth than these people, that the things that made up your body and your mind were not the same as the things that formed them. You had told Din that for him, you would be a warrior, and you still meant it, but every once in a while, something would happen that would remind you of just how far you had to go to get there, and the realization would ache like a wound inside your ribcage.

As the bickering and debating rose in volume around you, Din’s voice cut through the noise with an authority that would not be ignored.

“I’ll go.”

The group fell silent, and you felt your jaw drop open, your brows rising to meet your hairline. There was no way – Din couldn’t –

Mayfeld seemed to be thinking the same thing as you. “Hey, buddy, I might be good at fast-talking, but I don’t think I can explain away a guy in a Mando suit to Imperial guards,” he scoffed dismissively. “So unless you’re gonna take off that helmet, it’s gonna be me goin’ in alone. Or say good-bye to your little green friend.”

Your gaze jumped to the bounty hunter, studying the breadth of his pauldrons against the lush landscape. He carried himself like someone who had already made up his mind, and the weight of that decision was already pressing on him, weighing him down.

“You’re not going alone,” he refuted. “I’m coming with you. But I won’t be showing my face. The transport crew wear helmets – I can see them.” He tapped the side of his own helmet with his forefinger, pointing to his opaque black visor. “They look like Storm Trooper helmets. No one will be able to see my face through one of those.”

His assertion hung in the air for a moment, and you glanced around at your companions, taking in their expressions. Fennec and Boba appeared as stoic as ever, but while Cara looked concerned, her dark brows drawn inward and her mouth turned down, Mayfeld could only be described as flabbergasted.

“You gotta be kidding me. You wanna take off your precious armor…and put on a Trooper get-up instead?”

“‘Want’ might be too strong a word. But it doesn’t seem like we have much of a choice.”

From there, the conversation became about logistics – how Din and Mayfeld would board the transport, how they would take out the existing crew, what they would do with their bodies, and so on, a conversation which was primarily spearheaded by Cara. While she walked the group through the rest of the plan, Din closed the distance between the two of you, wrapped his hand around your elbow, and led you gently away from the crowd.

After you were some distance away, he ducked his head down to your level and murmured, “I’m going to ask you to stay on the ship with Fett, cyare.”

You offered him a lukewarm smile in return. “I know. It’s okay, I was going to suggest that anyway.” Breaking his gaze, you found yourself staring down at his cuirass, tracing the edges of the gem-like beskar segment that rested directly over his breastbone with your eyes. “I don’t want to be a liability to the mission.”

The hand around your elbow contracted. “I don’t see you that way.”

“I know you don’t, but the last thing I want is for my being there to…be a distraction for you or put you in more danger than necessary. And Fennec and the marshal are more than capable of handling the long-range support on their own.” Fennec was, you knew, a renowned sniper, and with Cara’s almost absurdly large, heavy-repeating blaster rifle, the distance was sure to be no issue for her. Your novice skills with your small hand blaster were laughable in comparison. “I’ll just…read through my notes on Gideon’s light cruiser some more. Maybe by the time you guys get back, I’ll have some more solid ideas about how to make boarding and disarming it easier.”

At that, the bounty hunter dragged his hand from your elbow up to your face, cupping your head in his wide palm, tilting your chin up so you could meet his eyes once more.

“We won’t be long,” he promised. The warm, worn pad of his thumb traced over the apple of your cheek, and you brought both of your hands up to wrap around his wrist. The cool, ridged beskar of his vambrace bit into the calloused skin of your fingers as you anchored him to you, loathe to let him go.

“Din.” His name was a whisper on your breath, both a testament to your overwhelm and a prayer for privacy, a hope that no one would hear the intimacy of this moment and the use of his true name here, out in the open. “Be safe. Please.”

Something like a laugh, weak and gravelly, filtered through his helmet. “I’ll do my best, gotabor’ika.”

You might have said more, might have declared more, but before you could open your mouth again, Mayfeld’s sharp, acerbic voice cut through the softness of the moment like a hot knife.

“Hey. Lovebirds.” You glanced over at him with a frown, finding him standing a few feet away, staring at the two of you with his arms crossed over his thick chest. “C’mon, we gotta get a move on if we want to make it in on one of today’s transports.”

You felt your stomach drop at the reminder, and your fingers dug into Din’s beskar of their own accord, a silent protest at having to let him go knowing what a risk this was, what dangers awaited him inside the refinery.

But Din did not hesitate. Instead, he nodded curtly in Mayfeld’s direction, leaned down, and pressed the forehead of his helmet delicately against yours.

The familiar, loving gesture soothed your nerves, and you allowed your hands to release him finally as he drew back, bringing himself back up to full height once more.

In the distance, Mayfeld made a dramatic noise of disappointment. “What, no headbutt good-bye for me, sweetheart?”

The irreverence startled a laugh out of you, and you shook your head incredulously. “You be careful, too, Migs.”

“Careful? Me?” The inmate winked at you flirtatiously, bright blue eyes twinkling in the sun. “Never.”

---

As the only ones returning to the ship, you and Boba were the first to break away from the group. The short walk back down the hill was a silent affair, the former bounty hunter on high alert as he scanned the vegetation with vigilant eyes, and you were quite content to keep it that way. You found yourself far too tied up in knots over this infiltration plan to be very good company. Thankfully, he had never struck you as much of a conversationalist.

Of course, this wasn’t your first experience with overly stoic, taciturn men. It wasn’t even your first experience with overly stoic, taciturn men in full beskar, so you took comfort in knowing that his silence likely had nothing to do with you and everything to do with his own disposition. On any other day, those glaring similarities to your early days with Din on the Razor Crest might have sparked your curiosity, might have encouraged you to push against the edges of that comfortable silence in an attempt to get to know him better. But today? Today you were festering with entirely too much anxiety to try to get chummy with the older man.

When Boba excused himself to the cockpit, eager to get back behind the helm in case he was needed, you didn’t protest. Instead, you settled into one of the small handful of jump seats in the navigation room, drawing your datapad from your pocket and attempting to make good on your promise to Din – that you would spend this time refining the plan for boarding and subduing Moff Gideon’s light cruiser. However, it wasn’t long before you were back on your feet again, unable to keep still as thoughts of Din and Mayfeld and that looming Imperial base swirled in your mind.

You lost track of time then, the echo of your boots against the durasteel flooring dissolving into the background as your feet carrying you steadily from one end of the room to the other. It was hardly a conscious decision, but somehow the movement was soothing.

“I can hear you wearing a hole in my decking in there, little one.”

You seized immediately mid-stride, your gaze snapping to the open door into the cockpit where Boba lay on his back in the pilot’s chair, staring up at the controls and the viewport facing the sky. He couldn’t see you from where he was, but apparently, that didn’t mean he wasn’t paying attention to you. A flush blazed up the back of your neck as you stammered, “Oh. Ah – sorry, I’ll…cut it out.”

You heard him shift in his seat, as though he was angling himself to look back at you, but before he could say anything in return, a high-pitched alarm sounded from the console before him. You could see the flashing red light from where you stood, its glaring reflection bouncing off of the metal of the open doorframe.

“Blast…” he grumbled, and you could hear the rapid pressing of buttons and flipping of switches.

Your years of expertise had your ears perked up as you almost instinctually started trying to identify the problem, to pick out the pitch and the frequency of the alarm and try to match it with any of the standard alarm codes you were familiar with. “Everything okay in there?”

“Fine. One of the drive engines’ coolant lines is leaking again.”

“Again?” Your brows rose in apprehension as you came to hover outside the cockpit door. “Is this…a regular occurrence?”

A low, frustrated sigh crackled through Boba’s helmet vocoder as he fussed with the still-protesting console. “Recently, yes. She’s been doing this ever since I got her out of dry dock.”

Ah. That would explain it. Kuat drive engines were known for their longevity, but even they had their limits. “How long was she in storage?” you asked, your worries about Din and Mayfeld and the Imperials feeling further away as that old, familiar drive to solve the puzzle, to fix what was broken came to the surface once again.

He was silent for a moment, seemingly needing to add up the time in his head on the spot. “‘Bout five years, give or take.”

Not terrible, you thought. “And how long before that were the lines replaced?”

Boba twisted around in his chair at that, looking at you over his shoulder with something that you interpreted as incredulity. With the frankly odd design of the Firespray, this had him looking down at you while you stared up at him from the navigation room floor, the sight giving you a bit of vertigo as your neck craned upward.

“Not sure,” he admitted after a beat.

The offer was out of your mouth before you could think better of it. “You want me to take a look at them for you?”

His reply was quick and gruff, though not unkind. “I do my own repairs.”

Damn. You shrugged, tamping down the immediate swell of disappointment. “Suit yourself.”

This was a unique ship, entirely one of a kind after all of the custom modifications Boba had made to it over the years. The desire to get your hands on her hardware and untangle the web of original Kuat parts and aftermarket mods had been lingering at the back of your mind since you first stepped foot on the Firespray, and a part of you mourned that you might never get the opportunity to sink your teeth into that puzzle. Even so, a lot of pilots were particular about their ships. You couldn’t find it in yourself to fault him for not wanting someone that he hardly knew mucking around in his mechanicals.

Still, you couldn’t stop yourself from asking, “So what, every time this happens you’ve just been diverting everything from the busted line to a different one?”

Another series of button presses and switch flips in the cockpit, and the alarm fell silent. Boba released a sigh of relief, sagging back against his chair. “Until I can pick up replacement parts? Yes.”

“This ship has…what? Three F-31 drive engines?”

Glancing back over at you once again, this time the older man appeared impressed rather than dubious. “Yes, that’s right.”

“You know each of them requires a minimum of four functioning coolant lines or else you risk overheating and burning them out. Right?”

The angle of his helmet as he stared down at you told you all you needed to know about what he thought about your question. His voice low and gravelly, he replied simply, “Yes.”

You shrugged again, feigning nonchalance as you leaned against the bulkhead underneath the cockpit door. “‘Kay. Just making sure you know what you’re getting yourself into.”

“Just what do you suggest?” Boba’s patience appeared to be wearing thin, as he had gone from gruff to growling almost in the blink of an eye, but something about it didn’t feel as intimidating with him hanging perpendicular in the cockpit like that.

“Don’t wait until you can replace the entire line. Instead of rerouting everything every time one of them blows, patch it,” you said bluntly. “I know it’s a pain in the ass, but in my experience, it’s worth it. It’ll put less stress on your engines and let you run for longer in between maintenance stops.”

“Hm.” His response came across as more of a grunt than an actual word.

You could feel a hopeful little smile starting to pull at your lips. “What do you think? We’ve got, what? About 30 minutes before they’re ready for us?”

“More or less.”

“I can patch three of them in that time. I’ll do the rest for you at our next stop.”

Boba cocked his helmet at you in a gesture so reminiscent of Din that it almost had your heart stuttering in your chest. “Awfully cocky, aren’t you, little one?”

That flush from earlier returned in full force. This man was trouble. Shaking your head and praying that you looked more composed than you felt, you replied, “I like to think of it as confident.”

A warm, rasping chuckle filtered through his modulator. “Fine. Maintenance access tunnel is – ”

“At the base of the nav console, I know.” A thrill of victory coursing through you, you did not bother saying goodbye or asking any more questions. The moment you had his blessing, you were off like a shot, rounding the navigation console and hauling up the panel of decking just in front of it. You dropped into the dark, dusty crawlspace without a thought, and for the first time since the Razor Crest went up in flames, you felt a sense of rightness settle over your bones.

There was nothing quite like the bowels of a starship to make you feel at home.

---

As you had guessed from what little you knew of the Firespray’s original design, the vast majority of the ship’s mechanicals could be found in the wide, flat oval dish that made up approximately two-thirds of the ship’s body. Also as you had guessed, most of the ship’s original parts, at some point or another, had been either heavily modified or gutted and replaced entirely, leaving the inside of the dish a disorganized hodgepodge of panels, wires, and tubing.

Well, perhaps “hodgepodge” wasn’t giving Boba enough credit. All of the work you encountered as you shimmied your way through the access tunnel had been neatly and meticulously done by someone who clearly knew this vessel inside and out – cables were deftly tied together and bracketed to the bulkheads, there wasn’t a single tube hanging dangerously across your path, and everything looked relatively clean, like it had been well sealed against the elements - though you admittedly struggled to make heads or tails of where he had installed each of the many aftermarket parts. For example, you were certain that the central life support systems were not designed to be housed right on top of one of the power generators, leaving them vulnerable if the generator were to surge. You supposed, over time, he had simply started making things fit wherever he could, whether it made the most parsimonious design sense or not.

Once you scurried your way through the crawlspace far enough to reach the drive engines, it took you a moment to locate each of their associated coolant lines, but once you did, the repairs proceeded smoothly from there. It was blatantly obvious which ones had worn through, and you found yourself feeling relieved that you had suggested this solution when you did. The largest of the three engines – the oblong one situated above the two round boosters – was down to a mere two functioning coolant lines. You prioritized the repair of that one first, patching where the aged, brittle tubing had split along its seaming.

Time melted away as you worked, the dim light that filtered through the deck plating strangely soothing, and just as you were crawling back toward the access hatch, the sharp snap of Fennec’s voice sounded in the far distance.

“We’re on,” she said over the cockpit’s commlink. You could hear blaster fire in the background, the sound making the little hairs on the back of your neck stand up. “Start your run.”

Boba’s response was quick and decisive. “On our way.” A beat of silence, and then, “Time’s up! Get away from the engines!”

A bolt of adrenaline shot through you, and you doubled your speed back through the crawlspace. A few seconds later, you hauled yourself up and out, sliding the deck panel back in place over the gaping hole in the floor. “It’s done!” you shouted up to the cockpit, no time to get to the comms panel. “Get us in the air!”

Beneath your feet, you felt the rumble and the hum of the drive engines engaging, and all around you, your surroundings began to shift. As Boba took the Firespray from laying flat on its back between the rainforest mountains to standing upright in midair, the navigation room remained stationary, the cockpit rotated to the space directly above you, and the wide transparisteel viewport dropped from the ceiling to the forward wall. Unlike when you had first come aboard, the sight didn’t make you dizzy or nauseous anymore. Instead, it simply filled you with awe, and you watched with wide eyes as the tops of the trees around you began to streak past at incredible speeds as Boba took off for the refinery.

Even in-atmosphere, the Firespray proved to be an almost laughably fast vessel. She cut through the humid air like a hot knife through butter, skimming and arcing around the mountainous terrain with an agility that even much smaller ships would be envious of, and with some deft piloting, it seemed to take less than a minute for the refinery to appear beneath the viewport. What you saw there, however, chilled whatever thrill of pride you might have felt as the speed of your rescue.

Two figures dressed in all black plastoid armor – one wearing a helmet, one very conspicuously not – had just heaved themselves up onto the refinery’s roof from a precarious ladder mounted to the side of the duracrete building. In pursuit, you counted no less than eight different Imperial combatants, all of whom had blaster rifles trained on the figures in black. Streaks of bright red blaster fire shot across the space between them, more than you could count, and you watched as the two retreating figures broke into a frantic run.

Heart in your throat, you darted over to the nav console and slammed your hand down on the internal comms panel. “We can’t land on that roof, Boba, there’s too many people!”

“Not planning on it, little one.”

More blaster fire erupted across the rooftop below, but the Firespray paid it no need. Swinging around to the front of the refinery, Boba guided the ship up and over the building. Glued mere inches from the surface of the viewport, you were transfixed as the pursuing Imperials began to drop in quick succession, picked off one by one by long-range fire that you knew had to be coming from Fennec and Cara up on the ridge. Still, the figures in black ran, and as you drew closer, it confirmed what you had already suspected – it was Din and Mayfeld, as yet unharmed, sprinting across the roof as fast as they could manage. Relief shuddered through you, breath catching in your chest, and on instinct, you reached for the viewport, pressing your palm flat against the cool transparisteel. They were alive, and they were going to make it out.

Your hand had no sooner touched the viewport that it began to rotate upward again. Jumping back from the edge of the navigation room platform, the ship spun around you once more to return to a horizontal position. The exit ramp began to drop open, wind whipping through the yawning door, and you gaped in the direction of the cockpit as you realized what Boba had done.

He had backed the Firespray up to the edge of the rooftop, leaving the ramp open for Mayfeld and your Mandalorian to jump into the ship.

You were at the top of the ramp in an instant, heedless of the flying blaster rounds that pinged off the surface of the hull and skittered across your path. The two of them were approaching the edge now, running at top speed, and for a brief moment, you locked eyes with Din through the visor of the unfamiliar Imperial helmet.

“Jump!” you cried, your voice swallowed by the wind, by the roar of the Firespray’s engines, by the shrieks of blaster fire.

With all the force he could muster, Din flung himself off the edge of the roof and landed with buckling knees on the open ramp. He managed to keep his footing, glancing back over his shoulder to Mayfeld, and then the inmate was right behind him. Launching off of the rooftop with a shout, Migs crossed the gap between the refinery and the ship in a hapless bound, landing hard on his knees with a distressed shout.

“We’ve got them! Get us out of here!”

Boba was quick to comply with your frantic shout, immediately drawing the Firespray away from the conflict. You lurched forward with the sudden change in speed, staggering out onto the ramp and wrapping your hand around Din’s bicep to steady yourself. Together, the two of you drew a breathless Mayfeld to his feet, but even as he regained his balance, the frantic, wide-eyed expression on his face remained.

“You okay?” you asked, gripping his armored shoulder firmly to get his attention. His gaze snapped to yours, and then he was scanning your surroundings, as though looking for something.

“Hand me that cycler rifle,” he said urgently, pointing off to the side of the ramp door where Boba’s thin, long-barreled slugthrower sat propped against the bulkhead. Din nodded once, obeying the request immediately, and passed the weapon into Migs’s hands.

With a steady, centering breath, the inmate raised the weapon to his shoulder, settled his cheek on the stock, and stared down the scope. One quick, even pull of the trigger, and on the surface of the roof, a mining transport vehicle erupted in a ball of fire.

That one explosion triggered another, then another, then another – several successive shipments of rhydonium all detonating at once, and before you knew it, the entire refinery had been engulfed in flames.

You and Din made quick eye contact with each other over Mayfeld’s shoulder, both of you sensing the significance of what he had just done, but then the moment was over, and the bald man was dropping the weapon and leaning it back against the wall where you had found it.

“We all need to sleep at night,” he said simply. In an unexpected gesture of camaraderie, Din clapped him on the back once as he ushered all of you deeper into the ship.

The ramp closed behind you, and all at once, the fact that both of these men had infiltrated an enemy base and come back to you alive washed over you. You were on Din in an instant, throwing both of your arms around his shoulders and dragging him down to your level. You pressed your forehead to the grimy plastoid surface of his unfamiliar helmet, missing the cool smoothness of the beskar, but the warmth of his hands on your hips felt the same as they always had. Cupping the sides of his neck, you ran your thumbs across the high neckline of his stolen Imperial uniform, feeling just the barest scrap of hot, smooth skin on the very tips of your fingers.

“Din,” you murmured, soft and close, and you heard him release a sigh of relief, the tension melting from his shoulders like ice under the summer sun as he wrapped himself around you.

“Cyare.”

From somewhere off to the side, Mayfeld made an exaggerated, disgusted sound. “When are you two gonna go back to bein’ mad at each other, huh? Fuckin’ hell.”

You grinned, something akin to fondness swelling in your chest at the familiarity of his sharp, ribbing tone. Pulling away from the Mandalorian, you swept Migs into his own hug, squeezing his broad frame tight against you. This startled a laugh out of him, and he patted your back in a placating gesture. “Yeah, yeah. Take it easy, sweetheart, I’m not tryin’ to have my ass kicked by your boy over there.”

You released him, giving his breastplate a good-natured shove. You had so many questions – had they been hurt at all, had they been able to obtain the coordinates they had been after, what had led to the shootout you had witnessed on the roof, what was with Mayfeld’s sudden decision to blow up the entire refinery? They all stood poised on the tip of your tongue, desperate to all spill over at once, but before you could even begin to untangle what you might want to ask first, Boba’s rasping voice echoed through the internal comm system.

“We got company,” he barked. “Hang on!”

The Firespray banked suddenly, sharply to the left, as though dodging something, and all three of you went flying as the floor lurched beneath you. You staggered backward, the deck rising up to meet you as you landed hard on your ass, Din grunted as his knees slammed into the floor right beside you, and Mayfeld yelped a curse as he swayed like a drunken man. The disruption lasted for a few moments, but as the ship evened out, the artificial gravity kicked in, giving you a sense of stability. You risked a glance out the front viewport then, a spike of fear shooting down your spine at the realization that you must have been pursued in your retreat.

It was as you had feared – sailing past the body of the Firespray were multiple, intermittent bursts of neon green laser canon fire. None had connected yet, but the fact remained that your escape from the refinery had not been quite as clean as you might have hoped. Someone was intent on not letting you get away.

Thankfully, it appeared that Boba had prepared for this. Beneath your feet, you felt a series of mechanisms engage, and somewhere far away, the groan of metal on metal sounded, like a door opening with great effort. A moment later, the whole ship rocked around you, and plumes of smoke bloomed from where behind the Firespray. Wisps of it floated up toward the viewport where you could see it, and you knew then that whatever had been chasing you, Boba had destroyed it.

---

“Well, looks like it’s back to the scrap heap.”

Mayfeld seemed resigned as you descended the ramp at his side, the Firespray having now landed at the rendezvous point where you were set to pick up Cara and Fennec. Din trailed behind, back in his beskar and looking much more like himself, and you exchanged a glance over your shoulder with him. You hated the idea of having to take Migs back to the penal world you had retrieved him from, and something told you that the Mandalorian might be feeling similarly. You weren’t certain what had transpired during their infiltration of the refinery, but whatever it was, it had seemingly shattered the tension between the two men, leaving them both behaving much less antagonistically toward each other after coming out on the other side.

You wished that the two of you had had an opportunity to be alone so you could ask him about it, but as it was, all you could really do was accompany him as he escorted the inmate back to Cara Dune’s side. As the New Republic marshal who had remanded him from prison, she would be the one to return him to custody.

As though summoned by your thoughts of her, Cara broke the treeline then, Fennec at her heels, both of them armed to the teeth with their long-range blaster rifles. You watched as her gaze landed on the three of you, her sharp features twisted into a smirk. Fennec simply nodded at you in acknowledgement and retreated into the ship.

“Thank you for helping,” Din said, entirely earnest when just a handful of days ago, such a sentiment would have been disingenuous. Mayfeld looked a bit bashful at the sincerity, and he shifted on his feet a bit in discomfort as he nodded.

“Yeah. Uh…good luck getting your kid back.” Turning to face Cara, the inmate grimaced and extended both hands toward her, wrists pressed tightly together in an imitation of binder cuffs. “All right, Officer. Take me back.”

You expected the marshal to produce a set of cuffs from her utility belt at that, but instead, she quietly studied the stubbly man before her, taking the measure of him as though suddenly seeing him through brand-new eyes.

“That was some nice shooting back there,” she quipped after a moment of tense silence.

“Oh, you saw that?” Mayfeld appeared almost embarrassed by the compliment, scratching the back of his neck as he squirmed under Cara’s intense gaze. “Yeah, that, uh, wasn’t part of the plan. Just…getting some stuff off my chest.”

The dark-haired woman nodded slowly, weighing his response, and then she turned to Din. Addressing him directly – and as though you and Mayfeld weren’t there at all – she said, “You know, it’s too bad Mayfeld didn’t make it out alive back there.”

Your jaw dropped, your gaze snapping from Cara to Din to Mayfeld and then back again, mind reeling at Cara’s words. Was she going to –

Din seemed to catch on before you did. It took no time at all for him to reply, “Yeah. Too bad.” Exaggerated. Like he was playacting, and poorly.

Migs seemed just as taken aback as you were. “What are you talkin’ about?” he snapped, his shoulders suddenly tense at the shift in the conversation.

The marshal, however, did not break eye contact with the bounty hunter and proceeded as though she hadn’t heard him. “Looked to me like Prisoner 34667 died in the refinery explosion on Morak.”

You huffed out a startled, breathless laugh as a wave of relief surged through you. Hand shooting out to grip the sleeve of his shirt, you whirled Mayfeld around to face you. “Go,” you whispered. You kept your voice down, as though trying to be discrete, trying not to draw the attention of either Din or Cara even though you knew they were right there, knew they could hear you just fine. “They’re letting you go!”

“Does that – does that mean I can go?” Migs asked aloud, his eyes still on the two figures in armor. “Huh? ‘Cause I will.”

Breaking character for a brief second, the Mandalorian wordlessly jerked his head to the side, indicating the forest path that Cara and Fennec had just emerged from. The inmate chuckled at that, finally glancing back at you with a relieved, disbelieving grin.

“All right. Okay.”

You squeezed his arm tightly, beaming back at him. Maker, this sweet, horrible, infuriating, pain-in-the-ass of a man. You had only had him in your life for a handful of days, and yet you felt as though you had been altered by his friendship. You had given you purpose, made you laugh, made you feel wanted when you had been so low, and you felt like a lighter, freer version of yourself now for having known him. And he had been willing to set aside his differences with Din to help you find Grogu, something neither of you would never be able to repay him for.

Migs Mayfeld was an asshole, but it turned out that he was also a good man.

Throwing caution to the wind, you yanked him toward you for a hurried hug, hoping the embrace conveyed all of the fondness and the well-wishes you sent along with him, and then you gave him a playful shove in the direction of the path. If he was going to go, it had to be now.

Mayfeld seemed to agree. He let you push him away, and then he was retreating down the path, arms out in front of him in a placating gesture that you knew was unnecessary now. Casting his gaze around to all three of you one last time, he sent you one final grin, a mock salute, and a half bow, and then he disappeared into the treeline.

You released a held breath then turned to Cara. Gripping her armored shoulder tightly, you breathed, “Thank you.”

A small smile quirking the corners of her lips, she inclined her head at you in acknowledgement but said nothing. Instead, she directed her next question at Din. “You get the coordinates on Moff Gideon?”

“We did,” he replied.

“What’s our next move?”

You glanced over your shoulder at him, wondering the same thing. The bounty hunter shifted his weight on his feet as he considered his response. After a beat, he said, “I have someone else whose help we can use. Someone who might want Gideon dead even more than I do.”

Cara and you exchanged dubious looks, and you thought that both of you must be wondering just who would want the moff dead more than Din.

The marshal shrugged then, arching an eyebrow in Din’s direction. “Okay then. Color me intrigued.”

You supposed if you were planning to take on a whole Imperial light cruiser on your own, with just your small group, you could use all the help you could get, but there was something in the hesitance of the Mandalorian’s response that had you questioning just what you would be getting yourselves into by inviting this person to join your party. However, your trust in him had never failed you before, so you set aside your misgivings and nodded. Whatever he needed to bring your boy back, you were going to help him get it. No matter what.

#din djarin #din djarin x reader #din djarin x f!reader #din djarin x you #the mandalorian #din djarin fanfiction #the mandalorian fanfiction #pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal characters fanfiction

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literary-illuminati · 5 months ago

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2024 Book Review #27 – From the Ruins of Empire: The Revolt Against the West and the Remaking of Asia by Pankaj Mishra

Yet another work of nonfiction I picked up because an intriguing-sounding quote from it went viral on tumblr. This was the fifth history book I’ve read this year, but the first that tries very consciously to be an intellectual history. Both an interesting and a frustrating read – my overall opinion went back and forth a few times both as I read and as I put together this review.

The book is ostensibly a history of Asia’s intellectual response to European empire’s sudden military and economic superiority and political imperialism in the 19th and 20th centuries, though it’s focus and sympathy is overwhelmingly with what it calls ‘middle ground’ responses (i.e. neither reactionary traditionalism nor unthinking westernization). It structures this as basically a series of biographies of notable intellectual figures from the Islamic World, China and India from throughout the mid-late 19th and early 20th centuries - Liang Qichao and Jamal al-Din al-Afghani get star bidding and by far the most focus, with Rabindranath Tagore a distant third and a whole scattering of more famous personages further below him.

The central thesis of the book is essentially that the initial response of most rich, ancient Asian societies to sudden European dominance (rung in by the Napoleonic occupation of Egypt and the British colonization of India) was denial, followed (once European guns and manufactured goods made this untenable) by a deep sense of inferiority and humiliation. This sense of inferiority often resulted in attempts by ruling elites and intellectuals to abandon their own traditions and westernize wholesale (the Ottoman Tanzimat reforms, the New Culture Movement in China, etc), but at the same time different intellectual currents responded to the crisis by synthesizing their own visions of modernity, and tried to construct a new world with a centre other than the West.

I will be honest, my first and most fundamental issue with this book is that I just wish it was something it wasn’t. Which is to say, it is a resolutely intellectual and idealist history, convinced of the power of ideas and rhetoric as the engine for changing the world. Which means that the biography of one itinerant revolutionary is exhaustively followed so as to trace the evolution of his world-historically important thoughts, but the reason the Tanzimat Reforms failed is just brushed aside as having something to do with europhile bureaucrats building opera houses in Istanbul. Not at all hyperbole to say I’d really rather it was actually the exact opposite – the latter is just a much more interesting subject!

Not that the biographies aren’t interesting! They very much are, and do an excellent job of getting across just how interconnected the non-Western (well, largely Islamic and to a lesser extent Sino-Pacific) world was in the early/mid-19th century, and even moreso how late 19th/early 20th century globalization was not at all solely a western affair. They’re also just fascinating in their own right, the personalities are larger than life and the archetype of the globe-trotting polyglot intelligentsia is one I’ve always found very compelling. While I complain about the lack of detail, the book does at least acknowledge the social and economic disruptions that even purely economic colonialism created, and the impoverishment that created the social base the book’s subjects would eventually try to arouse and organize. And, even if I wish they were all dug into in far more detail, the book’s narrative is absolutely full of fascinating anecdotes and episodes I want to read about in more detail now.

Which is a problem with the book that it’s probably fairer to hold against it – it’s ostensible subject matter could fill libraries, and so to fit what it wants to into a readable 400-page volume, it condenses, focuses, filters and simplifies to the point of myopia. Which, granted, is the stereotypical historian’s complaint about absolutely anything that generalizes beyond the level of an individual village or commune, but still.

This isn’t at all helped but the overriding sense that this was a book that started with the conclusion and then went back looking for evidence to support its thesis and create a narrative. Which is a shame, because the section on the post-war and post-decolonization world is by far the sloppiest and least convincing, in large part because you can feel the friction of the author trying to make their thesis fit around the obvious objections to it.

Which is to say, the book draws a line on the evolution of Asian thought through trying to westernize/industrialize/nationalize and compete with the west on it’s own terms (in the book’s view) a more authentic and healthy view that rejects the western ideals of materialism and nationalism into something more spiritual, humane, and cosmopolitan, with Gandhi kind of the exemplar of this kind of view. It tries to portray this anti-materialistic worldview as the ideology of the future, the natural belief system of Asia which Europe and America can hope to learn from. It then, ah, lets say struggles to to find practical evidence of this in modern politics or economics, lets say (the Islamic Republic of Iran and Edrogan’s Turkey being the closest). It is also very insistent that ‘westernization’ is a false god that can never work, which is an entirely reasonable viewpoint to defend but if you are then you really gotta remember that Japan/South Korea/Taiwan like, exist while going through all the more obvious failures. One is rather left feeling that Mishra is trying to speak an intellectual hegemony into existence, here. (The constant equivocation and discomfort when bringing up socialism – the materialistic western export par excellence, but also perhaps somewhat important in 20th century Asian intellectual life – also just got aggravating).

It’s somewhere between interesting and bleakly amusing that modernity and liberal democracy have apparently been discredited and ideologically exhausted for more than one hundred years now! Truly we are ruled by the ideals of the dead.

I could honestly complain about the last chapter at length – the characterization of Islam as somehow more deeply woven in and inextricable from Muslim societies than any other religion and the resultant implicit characterization of secular government as necessarily western intellectual colonialism is a big one – but it really is only a small portion of the book, so I’ll restrain myself. Though the casual mention of the failures of secular and socialist post-colonial nation-building projects always just reminds me of reading The Jakarta Method and makes me sad.

So yeah! I felt significantly more positively about the book before I sat down and actually organized my thoughts about it. Not really sure how to take that.

#book review #history #From the Ruins of Empire #From the Ruins of Empire: The Revolt Against the West and the Remaking of Asia #Pankaj Mishra

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communistkenobi · 1 year ago

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what are some of your favorite nonfiction podcasts?

the big one I recommend is just king things - two marxist academics go through the books of Stephen King in publication order. extremely funny and insightful podcast, very accessible (like this is not a theory podcast or anything, it’s very laid back and casual), and I really appreciate their approach to literary criticism.

game studies study buddies is by the same hosts as just king things but this is a theory podcast. Each episode they go over and discuss a book from the field of game studies (ie the academic study of games). I very much recommend you listen to this if you want to like passively absorb critical/leftist theory. The hosts are academics, one of which teaches about games regularly as a professor, so it kind of feels like someone is teaching you about a text. I find it fairly accessible, I learn a lot about games, and as I said they very frequently structure their discussions with left wing theory. I find them very insightful!

blowback is very good, it’s about the imperial history of the United States. a history/journalist type podcast. this can get extremely heavy and difficult to listen to given the subject matter so I would not binge this (I usually listen to it when I’m doing a physical activity) but it’s a really good source of historical information and has helped me develop my political understanding of modern western imperial history. each season covers a different event: S1 is the invasion of Iraq, S2 is the Cuban Revolution, S3 is the Korean War, S4 is the invasion of Afghanistan

ALAB (all lawyers are bad) is good with some caveats. It’s a podcast by a bunch of lawyers who spend a lot of time on twitter discussing how horrible lawyers are, usually either focusing on specific high-profile lawyers (Kavanaugh, Dershowitz), specific american legal regimes (anti-BDS legislation, sanction law, etc), or specific trends in the legal system that causes structural problems (eg lifetime judgeship appointments with no mandatory retirement age). They also sometimes do random funny lawsuits or cover legal responses to events like Jan 6th. A mixed bag in terms of focus but mostly it’s hating on American law and the legal system. This is a critical recommendation because it’s a bunch of lawyers dudes riffing and some of their analysis can be stupid/bad, they say stupid shit that comes off as “anti identity politics” at times, etc. I’m pulling from memory because it’s been a while since I listened to them so I’m sorry if this is overly vague/general. The best way to describe it is chapo-adjacent if that means anything to you lol

and finally the podcast knowledge fight. this is a podcast dedicated to covering and debunking Alex Jones. in all honesty I don’t find this podcast super valuable in terms of analysis, like they are only really focused on debunking the claims Jones makes and explaining why they’re factually wrong. Which like that’s a good thing to do, I’m not saying its bad, but I don’t really need to be convinced Jones is lying about everything lol so I don’t personally find it super useful/insightful. If you have to interact with Alex Jones fans regularly (like family members) then maybe that will be more valuable for you! Totally depends. however the reason I bring them up is because I DO recommend the series of episodes they have titled formulaic objections - in this series they go through all the deposition material from the sandy hook lawsuit against Alex Jones (the one that cost him a billion dollars in damages and court sanctions lol). They play clips of the depositions throughout these episodes, which are so fucking insane to listen to. Like listening to a bunch of employees of an insane fringe right wing media organisation being questioned by lawyers for hours on end is so entertaining lmao. This lawsuit is about the sandy hook school shooting so a warning about the subject matter, it can get dark at times, but on the whole it’s extremely fucking funny to listen to. And the hosts provide a lot of context for what’s going on in the lawsuit, talk about it, and also they debunk the shit Jones lies about in court that you may not know about, so I find that part of it really good.

#asks #hope that helps !

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nellasbookplanet · 7 months ago

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Book recs: Space!! part 1

We all love space, right? I certainly love space, and I'm always on the hunt for a good space book. What you've got here is a pretty wild mix of everything from fun and adventurous space opera to horrific and brutal space horror - hopefully all the space fans can find something to enjoy!

For more details on the books, continue under the readmore. Titles marked with * are my personal favorites. And as always, feel free to share your own recs in the notes!

If you want more book recs, check out my masterpost of rec lists!

The Long Way To a Small, Angry Planet (Wayfarers series) by Becky Chambers

Rosemary Harper just got a job on the motley crew of the Wayfarer, a spaceship that works with tunneling new wormholes through space. With a past she wants to leave behind, Rosemary is happy to travel the far reaches of the universe with the chaotic crew, but when they land the job of a life time, things suddenly get a lot more dangerous. A bit of a tumblr classic in its day, this is a cozy space opera with an episodic feel and vividly realized characters and cultures. While pretty light on romance and focusing found family, there is a main f/f relationship.

Ascension by Jacqueline Koyanagi

Ascension follows Alana Quick, an expert Sky Surgeon who stows away on a spaceship in hopes of landing herself a job. But the ship and its crew are in deeper waters than she expected, facing threats emerging from a whole other universe, all of them searching for the same person: Alana’s spiritually enlightened sister. Undeniably a bit of an odd read, Ascension is also very creative and features polyamorous lesbian relationship.

Illuminae (The Illulminae Files) by Amie Kaufman & Jay Kristoff*

Young adult told through the medium of transcripts, text messages and the like (this is one of few books where I highly recommend reading a physical copy over a digital or audio copy as the visual aspect is much more enjoyable like that). After their colony is attacked, the surviving inhabitants flee on spaceships, attempting to avoid the pursuing killers while also dealing with a deadly maddening plague on board and a ruthless ship AI seemingly losing its mind.

Kea's Flight by Erika Hammerschmidt & John C. Ricker

Young adult. Kea has been in exile since before she was born. In a future where abortion has been forbidden, Earth has found a new way of handling unwanted children: send them off to space to colonize new planets. Kea has lived her entire life on a spaceship, surrounded by other kids rejected for 'flaws' in their genetic makeup, Kea herself being on the autism spectrum. The ship follows a strict authority, but when a new threat appears, Kea and her friends must rise up to ensure they make it to their new home.

The Loneliest Girl in the Universe by Lauren James*

Young adult. Romy is the only survivor on a spaceship headed toward a new planet, her only contact with other people being messages sent to and from Earth which take months to arrive. Then she receives news: another ship has been sent, one which is more advanced than hers and will eventually catch up. Ecstatic about the prospect of meeting other people, Romy begins communicating with J, the sole passenger of the other ship, and finds herself developing feelings for him. But Romy knows nothing about J, and have begun receiving worrisome messages from Earth...

Ancillary Justice (Imperial Radch universe) by Ann Leckie*

A space opera in which sentient spaceships can walk the ground in stolen human bodies, so called ancillaries. One of these ancillaries, the sole survivor after the complete destruction of her ship and crew, is on the hunt for revenge against the leader of the Empire for her crimes. This series does very cool things with gender and culture!

The Stars are Legion by Kameron Hurley

Zan wakes without memory, a passenger aboard one of the living world-ships of Legion, a fleet of decaying generations ships. Told she's the salvation meant to free them from the fleet, Zan is flung head first into a brutal and bloody conflict. This book fucked me up when I read it. It’s weird, it’s gross, there’s So Much Viscera, there are literally no men, it has living spaceships and biotech but in the most horrific way imaginable. Had I to categorize it I would call it grimdark military sf. It’s an experience but not necessarily a pleasant one.

Ninefox Gambit (The Machineries of Empire) by Yoon Ha Lee*

Disgraced Captain Kel Cheris is given a second chance by allying with and becoming the host for undead Commander Shous Jedao, who in life never lost a battle, but also went mad and massacred his own army. Now, Cheris must decide just how far she can trust him, with her forces as well as with her sense of self. Military space opera where belief and culture shape the laws of reality, causing all kinds of atrocities as empires do everything in their power to force as many people as possible to conform to their way of life to strengthen their technology and weapons. It’s also very queer, with major gay, lesbian and trans characters, albeit little to no romance.

An Unkindness of Ghosts by Rivers Solomon

Life on the lower decks of the generation ship HSS Matilda is hard for Aster, an outcast even among outcasts, trying to survive in a system not dissimilar to the old antebellum South. The ship’s leaders have imposed harsh restrictions on their darker skinned people, using them as an oppressed workforce as they travel through space toward their supposed Promised Land. But as Aster finds a link between the death of the ship’s sovereign and the suicide of her own mother, she realizes there may be a way off the ship.

172 Hours on the Moon by Johan Harstad*

Young adult horror. NASA is finally returning to the moon, and to gain the needed funding and attention they hold a world-wide lottery: three teenagers will get to travel to a recently revealed moon base alongside the trained astronauts. For Antoine, Midori, and Mia, this is the chance of a lifetime. But there's a reason NASA stayed away from the moon for so long, and while three teens may be going there, only one will return... This book scared the shit out of me as a teen, recommended for slowburn mix of supernatural and sci-fi horror.

Children of Time (Children of Time series) by Adrian Tchaikovsky*

Millennia and generation spanning sci-fi. After the collapse of the earthen empire, a planet once part of a project to uplift other species to sentience is left to develop on its own, resulting not in the intelligent monkeys once intended but in sentient giant spiders. Millennia later, what remains of humanity arrives looking for a new home, only to be met by the ancient, artificial remains of the woman who once led the uplift project - and she is not willing to let them disturb her spiders, or her planet, no matter how desperate they are.

All Systems Red (The Murderbot Diaries) by Martha Wells*

After having hacked its own governor module, SecUnit uses its small amount of new freedom to secretly download and watch as much media as it can between doing its job guarding humans. But when the scientists it’s been charged with keeping safe come under attack, it must make a choice about whether to continue keeping its freedom secret or risk it all to save them. The series features both novellas and full length novels, and balances humor with scathing critique of capitalism.

Dust (Jacob's Ladder series) by Elizabeth Bear

In a dying spaceship, orbiting an equally dying sun, noblewoman Perceval waits for her own gruesome death. Having been captured by an opposing house, her wings severed and life forfeit, Perceval's execution is imminent - until a young servant charged with her care proves to be Perceval's long lost sister. To stop a war between houses likely to doom them all, the two flee together across a crumbling, dangerous spaceship. And at its core waits Jacob Dust, god and angel, all that remains of what the ship once was. And he wants Perceval.

Binti (Binti trilogy) by Nnedi Okorafor

Young adult novella. Binti is the first of the Himba people to be accepted into the prestigious Oomza University, the finest place of higher learning in all the galaxy. But as she embarks on her interstellar journey, the unthinkable happens: her ship is attacked by the terrifying Meduse, an alien race at war with Oomza University.

A Big Ship at the Edge of the Universe (The Salvagers) by Alex White

In a universe where science and magic work hand in hand, Boots Elsworth makes a living selling fake treasure maps and Nilah Brio is a racer. When one of Boots' maps turns out to be more real than expected and Nilah has to go on the run after having been framed for a murder, the two find themselves on the same spaceship, working with Boots' old captain to find the rumored treasure and reveal the conspiracy it's hiding before the people hunting them catch up. Features a main f/f relationship.

The Vanished Birds by Simon Jimenez

A strange child lands on an isolated planet, scaring its inahbitants into handing him over into the hands of Nia Amani. As captain of a transport ship, Nia is not only the planet's only contact with the outside world, she is also a woman outside of time, years compressing into months as she travels through space at high speed. Now responsible for a child who doesn't speak and in a galaxy that wishes them ill, she must rethink exactly what she wants to do with her life, and what she's prepared to give up. Features multiple major queer characters.

Eacaping Exodus (Escaping Exodus duology) by Nicky Drayden

Seske is the heir to the leader of a clan living inside a gigantic, spacefaring beast, of which they frequently need to catch a new one to reside in as their presence slowly kills the beast from the inside. While I found the ending rushed with regards to plot and character, the worldbuilding is very fresh and the overall plot of survival and class struggle an interesting one. It’s also sapphic!

Dead Silence Here by S.A. Barnes

Horror. As her current mission as team leader for a small repair crew in distant space nears its end, Claire grows desperate to find a way to not have to return to a life on Earth. When the crew picks up a distress signal from Aurora, a luxury cruise ship thought lost decades ago, she sees a chance to make enough money on salvage to buy her own ship. But Aurora is housing horrifying secrets beyond its cold hull, and Claire's own past is coming back to literally haunt her. If she wants to survive, dangerous truths must be revealed.

Activation Degradation by Marina J. Lostetter

Unit Four comes to life in the middle of a war. The mine it was created to care for is under attack, and as Unit Four is activated with the memories of its predecessors, it is thrown into the task of protecting it at any cost. When the battle leads to its capture, it is prepared to do anything to stop its captors, even as their very presence causes it to question all that it knows. Includes multiple major intersex characters.

This Alien Shore by C.S. Friedman

Space opera in which humanity found a way to faster than light travel and began establishing colonies all over the galaxy, only to belatedly realize the method of FTL caused irreversible mutations and disabilities and leaving their nascent colonies to die. Much later, many of the colonies have survived and thrived, and one has found a new method of FTL travel, allowing an interconnected space society to grow. However, Earth is on the hunt for their method and is prepared to do anything to steal it. Trapped in the middle of all this and forced on the run is young Jamisia, who is little by little coming to realize that not only might she be the very solution Earth is after, she’s also not alone in her own mind and body.

Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir*

Ryland Grace just woke up from a coma, unable to remember anything. He finds himself alone on a spaceship, the rest of the crew dead, and as his memories slowly trickle back, he realizes he’s been sent on a mission: to find a solution to the impending doom of the earth. Still struggling with holes in his memories, Ryland tries to fulfill his mission, but as he gets closer to his goal, he discovers someone else got there first. And they aren’t anything close to human. Funny, heartfelt, and heavy on the science.

House of Suns by Alastair Reynolds

Six million years in the future, humanity has spread across the entire Milky Way galaxy. Purslane and Campion are both clones of the same woman, sent into the galaxy millions of years ago to explore along with almost a thousand clones like them. Every 200 000 years they all meet to compare memories and experiences. But this time Purslane and Campion arrive late - and discover that a secret millions of years in the making has led to an extinction level attack against their kind. Now they must find out the truth before their line is completely wiped out. Absolutely wild world-building, featuring various kinds of posthumans (among which the clones are, shockingly, the most similar to people of our time).

Empress of Forever by Max Gladstone

Vivian Liao is a highly successful innovator, but she may have bitten off more than she can chew and fears the government is coming for her. As she goes into hiding, she attempts to pull off one last stunt that could fix everything - but something goes wrong, and suddenly Vivian finds herself waking up in the far future, under attack by an army of robots in space. Hoping to find her way back home, Vivian must assemble a crew of dangerous outlaws and outcasts to help her hunt down the Empress of Forever, the all-powerful entity who pulled her into the future. Lesbian main character.

Finder (Finder Chronicles) by Suzanne Palmer

Fergus Ferguson is a finder, and his latest job has just taken him to a small colony in the farthest corner of inhabited space. There he's searching for a stolen spaceship, what he thinks will be an easy job. But things become complicated as Fergus' arrival inadvertently sets off a civil war, forcing him to ally with the thief's enemies to get out alive with his prize. And beyond it all, the ships of a dangerous and mysterious alien species watches over it all, picking people off when least expected.

Space Opera (Space Opera duology) by Catherynne M. Valente

Eurovision in space! If you lose, humanity is doomed! Good luck! The sentient species of the galaxy have chosen to face each other not in war but in a musical contest, and now humanity is invited to partake. The problem? If we lose, our species as a whole will be exterminated. While I found this book as a whole slightly gimmicky, it’s a fun and flashy experience with some wild and creative alien species.

Blindsight (Firefall duology) by Peter Watts*

Vampires and aliens and questions of the nature of consciousnesses, oh my! A ship is sent to investigate the sudden appearance of an alien vessel at the edge of the solar system, but the crew isn’t prepared for the horrors awaiting them. No, seriously, this book will fuck you up, highly recommend if you’re okay with a lot of techno babble and existential horror.

The Outside (The Outside trilogy) by Ada Hoffman*

AKA the book the put me in an existential crisis. Souls are real, and they are used to feed AI gods in this lovecraftian inspired sci-fi where reality is warped and artificial gods stand against real, unfathomable ones. Autistic scientist Yasira is accused of heresy and, to save her eternal soul, is recruited by cybernetic ‘angels’ to help hunt down her own former mentor, who is threatening to tear reality itself apart. Sapphic main character.

Honorary mentions AKA these didn't really work for me but maybe you guys will like them: Dare Mighty Things by Heather Kaczynski, Chilling Effect by Valerie Valdes, Medusa Uploaded by Emily Devenport, We Are Legion (We Are Bob) by Dennis E. Taylor, The Genesis of Misery by Neon Yang

#nella talks books #book recs #space #space books my absolute beloved #next list will probably be queer horror books so look forward to that!

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hugmekenobi · 1 year ago

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S2: The Bad Batch (4)

Chapter Four: Faster

GIF by @azertyrobaz

Hunter x femaleJedi!reader

Series Summary: Some time has passed since everything that happened at Kamino and you and the Batch are trying to figure out your place in the rapidly changing Imperial galaxy. And you're having to do all this whilst figuring out where your relationship with Hunter fits into it.

Chapter Summary: Two different missions with two different approaches but that end with the same realisation.

Masterlist for S1

<Previous Chapter

Genre: Friends (idiots) to Lovers (we're in the lovers stage now)

Chapter Warnings: Swearing, my own interpretation of the nerf nugget mission, chaos in the form of discovering human decency still exists, mild angst in the form of unhealthy eating habits (only for this chapter)/mentions of food, Cid being Cid, fluff, mild hurt/comfort, canon-typical risks and mentioned droid death, mentions of gambling

Word Count: 4.9K

Author's notes: Back on following the episode plots again :), only added a little bit of my own spin on things this time! Excited to get to work on Ch5 now. Hope y'all enjoy!!

Wrecker studied the Dejarik board carefully before he made his move. He chuckled smugly as his pieces knocked out some of Omega’s. “I got ya this time.”

Omega just gave him a somewhat pitying look before she programmed in her move and her player swiftly wiped out all of Wrecker’s.

Wrecker let out an aggrieved shout. “What-” He broke off with a groan.

Omega laughed gleefully. “Now you owe me two cartons of Mantell Mix.”

Well, he couldn’t have that. “Not so fast. One more game. Double or nothing.” Wrecker offered.

“Hey! Quit running up the power bill.” Cid snapped as she emerged from her office. “It’s time to get to work. I got another job for you.” She turned off the game.

“But the other three aren’t back from their mission yet.” Omega reminded her.

“I would not call transporting 50 cases of nerf nuggets a “mission”.” Tech interjected from the bar. “Nor is it a proper use of our skill set.” He added pointedly.

“Yeah, well, your skill set will come in real useful on this one.” Cid replied. “Especially you, Muscles. You’re gonna be my security crew.” She walked towards the exit.

“We will require a more detailed briefing than that.” Tech called after her.

“No time. The shuttle’s waiting.” Cid said dismissively.

“Maybe it’ll be fun.” Omega said optimistically as Wrecker chucked her bow and hat.

“Works for me.” Wrecker grunted.

Tech sighed. It looked like without the presence of you three, it was his turn to be the assigned sensible crew member.

“Hey, Hunter. Do you know there’s a whole row of nuggets missing from this crate?” Echo called over to the cockpit.

Shit, shit, shit. You thought anxiously. You had forgotten all about that. You kept your gaze focused on the blue hyperspace swirls in the space outside the window.

“No.” Hunter replied quizzically. He got out his chair and manoeuvred his way around the many boxes to where Echo was standing and sure enough, there was indeed a section that was nuggetless. “Huh. That’s weird.”

Echo let out a frustrated groan. “I bet Wrecker just helped himself before we left. He will eat anything.”

“Yeah, I’ll talk to him when we’re back.”

Well, you couldn’t allow that to happen. “It wasn’t Wrecker.” You called over to them as you shimmied past a crate.

“And how do you know?” Echo queried.

You hesitated a moment before you mumbled, “It was me.” Your eyes focused on the floor in shame.

“You thought you’d just help yourself when you knew they were for a mission?” Echo said with a frown.

“I spotted the crates in her office yesterday. There was no sign, no indication that they were for anything other than her personal use, so I took some.” You said defensively, crossing your arms.

“But why? I’d expect that sorta behaviour from Wrecker but not you.”

“It just happened, okay. Leave it.” You snapped. You regretted your tone immediately. You didn’t want them to bear the brunt of the frustration and anger that you were actually feeling towards yourself.

“No. That’s not an answer.” Echo retorted.

Hunter could tell by the way your feet shifted and the way you kept adjusting your gloves that there was more to this than a simple lack of willpower for something other than rations. “What is it you’re not telling us?”

“It’s nothing.” You said dismissively.

“(Y/N).” Hunter pressed.

“Yeah, you kinda owe us an explanation. You’ve put our credits at risk.” Echo added crossly.

“I know, I know. I’m sorry.” You said sincerely. “I didn’t mean to. I-” You stopped and ran a hand across your face. “Before I tell you both, I want you to know that it wasn’t a big deal, I know what I can handle, and I am fine.” You looked at Hunter when you said that last part.

“Okay…” Echo said, his eyes narrowing slightly, unsure as to what you were going to say.

Hunter found himself getting nervous. Why wouldn’t you be fine?

You took a deep breath. “So, you know how the recent jobs from Cid have had a bit more of a divide and conquer approach? And for the past few I’ve been on the delivering and credit receiving end of things?”

“Uh huh.” They both said. The start of this elongated explanation you were providing wasn’t doing much in the way of diffusing the tense atmosphere. Clearly, you felt it necessary to soften the blow of whatever it was.

“And we usually get a cut from Cid after each mission and it’s always in her favour, but we still have enough to, you know, eat?” You watched them both nod. “Well, in the recent days, that cut has been growing more and more in her favour and when I argued with her about it, she claimed with the Empire growing by the day, she needed the bigger cut to keep her operation covert and it was either this or nothing and uh, that kinda hit our finances hard, particularly in the food department.”

Hunter’s jaw clenched; he didn’t like where this was going.

Knowing that this next bit wasn’t going to be met well, you found yourself pulling your vibroblade in and out of your vambrace. “And um I figured you all would need the regular amounts of stuff and I didn’t want to raise unnecessary concern, so I made the decision to cut back on mine. For the most part, it was fine, I only caved yesterday when I saw them sitting there. It kinda all hit at once and I couldn’t help it and I took some.”

They were both silent for a moment before Hunter broke the quiet. “How many missions?”

“Uhhh only like the um past… five.” You winced out. He sounded too calm about this, and it unnerved you.

Echo didn’t quite know what to say. He hadn’t expected that.

Hunter had to take a moment to compose himself before he spoke. The fact that Cid had forced you into a situation like that in the first place almost had him turning the ship around. And the fact you had gone through it alone wasn’t helping. “You haven’t been eating for five days?” His voice wavering slightly as he struggled to keep his emotions at bay.

Sensing his growing feelings of upset and stress, you spoke quickly, “Not quite. Remember we had that day where we had two missions for the price of one.”

Hunter shook his head and his hands fell to his waist. Your attempts to downplay things weren’t helping to alleviate his concerns. “(Y/N)-”

“And I had scraps but sure I guess technically I haven’t had a proper meal or set of rations for four days.” You continued nonchalantly.

“And you didn’t tell us? Tell me?” Hunter asked. He couldn’t hide the hurt or mild frustration in his voice at the thought of you putting yourself through that and not telling any of them.

“Are you asking me as my Sergeant or as my partner?” You deflected.

“Both.”

“Should I leave and pretend not to hear this from the cockpit?” Echo interrupted quickly. You two, for the most part, were completely professional when on missions but he could feel some tension rising and he did not want to be in the middle of a couple’s argument with the two of you.

“No, it’s fine, Echo.” You responded. “Right, Hunter?”

Hunter took a deep breath and reminded himself that the main person who deserved his anger was back on Ord Mantell. He wasn’t mad at you. Irritated at your suffer in silence, laid back attitude maybe but there wasn’t anything to fight over here. “Yeah, it’s fine.”

You began your explanation. “I didn’t want to add any extra stress and I knew if it were up to the rest of you to do something with the amount we had, you wouldn’t get enough. Omega needs a proper meal and Wrecker too. Tech is too busy looking at his datapad or whatever new project takes his fancy that he’d forget to feed himself if someone wasn’t putting the food in front of his face and he was recovering from a severe injury so I knew he couldn’t go without.” You sheathed your vibroblade and faced them both again. “Echo, I care about you, but you are a very picky eater, and I didn’t want to deviate from anything and run the risk of you not being able to find something you liked. And Hunter, I knew if I said anything to you, you’d immediately make sure we’d all be provided for, and you would be the one to suffer for it. You have enough going on, you deserved to eat properly and not worry about something for a change. So, I decided to pull rank. Afterall, I was a general back in the day and decided the food situation was simply a need-to-know basis.” You glanced back down at the floor.

Hunter released an exasperate sigh, but he found himself giving you a small smile to lighten the mood slightly. The only person who deserved his anger was Cid and you were being unnecessarily hard enough on yourself already. “Well, first of all, I think you lost your rank when you chose to leave.”

You couldn’t really disagree with him on that one. It had been a rather weak defence. “Fair enough.” You conceded with the corner of your mouth twitching into a slight grin.

“Second of all, and I can speak for everyone here when I say that that is both incredibly kind and generous but idiotic of you to do. We need you at full strength too and I’m sure we can find ways around this. We can all sacrifice a bit; it doesn’t need to all be on you.”

“But-”

“I’ll talk to Cid. See if we can sort something out. In the meantime, we can still make do but we will all take less and continue to make sure Omega has full meals.” Hunter said. “She keeps pulling stuff like that now, it’s getting to be more of a problem.” He said, a hint of anger rising in his voice. Things had always been unequal with Cid, but they hadn’t really been any worse off, now that was changing, and it wouldn’t be sustainable or fair to keep going like that. It had already started to affect you and he didn’t want that for you or his squad. “Think the boys’ll agree to that?” He asked his brother.

“Definitely.” Echo agreed. “Although Wrecker might take some convincing.” He joked.

“Thank you.” You said quietly.

“We’re a squad. We look out for each other. The self-sacrifice isn’t a requirement.” Hunter reassured you as he laid a hand on your shoulder.

“I hate to bring it up though but what about the client?” Echo asked.

“Hope he doesn’t look too closely at every box.” Hunter said simply. “It’s all we can do.”

“I’m sorry, guys.” You mumbled guiltily. Of course, you found a way to complicate the simplest mission.

“It’s okay. You didn’t know and if anything, I should be thanking you for looking out for us like that.” Echo appeased. “We’ll find a way out. We always do.”

“Exactly.” Hunter agreed, pulling you into his chest. “Although, next time, please just tell me. Share the load, remember?” He muttered into your hair.

You hummed out a short laugh. “Guess I gotta work on that too.”

“Well, everything appears to be in order.” The client said with a clap of his hands. “You all were very efficient, I’m impressed.”

“It’s what we do, sir.” You said cheerily as you laid the last crate down. The rather unsophisticated strategy had been to be as accommodating and as friendly as possible in the hopes that whoever you were going to be dealing with would let you all away with the money without feeling the need to double check the delivery. What had greeted had caught you off guard. Your client was waiting with a tray of beverages and immediately, very politely, asked for your names and enquired about your wellbeing. So, in the end, he’d made it quite an easy feat. You weren’t used to dealing with many pleasant people on Cid’s missions, but this man was a breath of fresh air. A simple diner owner who seemed to be perfectly content with his place in the galaxy.

“Now, I just need to check that each one has the correct amount. I’ve been scammed before, so I’ve learned to be cautious.” He said lightly.

The three of you shared a panicked look.

“We can just get paid and get out of your hair.” Hunter said, barely concealing the uneasiness in his tone as he saw him begin to go through each crate.

“You must understand that I can’t be too careful these days. Business is tough enough as it is with how the Empire is running things. I need certain assurances.”

Hunter. Let me try something.

Hunter half turned to face you and nodded.

You called on the Force and subtly waved your hand in his direction. It was a longshot since he seemed pretty sharp, but it was your last card to play. “You don’t need to check every box.”

The client gave you a puzzled look. “Yes, I do, I just explained why I had to.”

You bit back your frustrated groan and the three of you could only watch as he continued investigating each box before he finally arrived at the sight of your mistake.

“Now, I believe I wanted 50 full crates of nuggets or there wouldn’t be a payment. Care to explain what happened here?” He asked the three of you coolly.

You felt Hunter and Echo beside you both go to speak, and you knew they would try to cover for you, but you needed to own your error and you took this man for someone appreciated honesty.

“I ate some.” You admitted shamefacedly. There was no sense in lying to him.

“Oh dear oh dear, that won’t do.” He said, giving the three of you a disappointed look. “You were attempting to get away with it.”

“We needed the money.” You attempted to explain.

“We all need money, that doesn’t make deceit okay.” He scolded. “Why should I pay you for this?”

“I understand why you’re upset sir, but when my team is struggling to eat, I have to do what I can to change it. A mistake was made but we need that money.” Hunter answered.

“What can I do?” You asked. “Please don’t punish them for something I did.”

“What can we do?” Hunter corrected, giving you a pointed look.

Right, no self-sacrifice. You said giving him a slight smile.

“You ever get tired of being a third wheel?” The client asked Echo, gesturing at you and Hunter. He wasn’t a fool. The automatic defence Hunter had provided you and the way the two of you had looked at each other both now and when the crates were being unloaded, it was like there was an understanding, an unspoken language between you that only you two were in on. He’d had that. Once. A long time ago.

Echo merely grunted, neither in agreement nor disagreement.

Your attention turned back to the client. “We’re a capable bunch, there has to be some way we can all get what we want.”

The client pondered for a few moments before he looked to Echo. “You know your way around machinery?”

Echo’s back straightened. “Yes, sir.”

He released a low hum before he faced you and Hunter. “And do you two think you could handle waiting some tables? Two of my staff called in sick and I haven’t found covers.”

“Definitely.” You said swiftly whilst Hunter nodded.

He hummed in thought again. “Echo, my dishwasher has been acting up and I haven’t had enough finances to cover the cost of a new one. If you can fix it, and if you two are servers for the length of time it takes you to fix it, I’ll still pay you in full.”

“You’d- you’d what?” You questioned, utterly taken aback. There was no way this was real.

“I’d still pay you in full if you’d do a bit of additional work.” He maintained.

“That’s it?” Hunter double checked.

“That’s it. You seem like nice people stuck in an unfortunate position. I’ve had dealings with Cid before and I believe that she hasn’t made things easy for you. Do these things for me, and we can go our separate ways without any unpleasantries.” He replied merrily before he waved you all inside.

“With all due respect, sir, how have you survived this long?” You couldn’t help but ask as you followed him in. “Decent people tend not to succeed in this galaxy.”

He sighed. “A question I ask myself every day.”

“So, we got a mild reprimand and then had to do an hour’s worth of extra labour to leave with the amount of money we were promised? Plus, he gave us some food and let us keep our servers’ tips?” You felt the need to say out loud as you held the small container of food in front of you. It was the first mission in Force knows how long that hadn’t ended with your blasters drawn and barely getting away alive and you weren’t really sure that it had actually happened. It just didn’t feel natural.

“I’m just as confused as you are.” Hunter responded, staring at the extra credits in his hand as you all walked back to the ship.

“I’ve been thinking it over in my head and I still don’t know how this was a success.” Echo agreed. “He must’ve really needed that dishwasher fixed.”

“Or he’s just really that good a guy and it hasn’t gotten him killed yet.” You added as an alternative.

The three of you walked in comfortable silence until you spoke again as the ship came into view. “The others aren’t going to believe it. A mission like that just doesn’t happen for us.” You said with a laugh.

“I wonder how they’re getting on without us there to supervise.” Echo mused.

“I dread to think.” Hunter said as he opened the ship’s ramp.

“We’ve left them alone. Without a job. In Cid’s parlour. Omega will just be playing Dejarik with them the whole time. How much trouble could they possibly get into?” You said as you boarded the ship.

“I will be the racer.” Tech volunteered confidently. Being the sensible one had promptly disappeared from his head. In his defence, he had tried in the beginning but the chaos of the environment they had found themselves in had called upon a more relaxed approach. Being responsible wouldn’t get them very far here, although Cid had probably swayed too far in the irresponsible direction. A rather problematic problem that had been increasing by the day.

Safa Toma was indeed a ‘little rough around the edges’ as Cid described it, if not more so. And now they were having to bail Cid out of trouble with an old partner. His name was Millegi and he was calling in the bet money Cid owed him. With her way out of the situation- her riot racer droid Tay-O- being destroyed, not once but twice- both times by Millegi’s racers- Tech found himself listening to Omega’s pleas and offered to take TAY-O’s place. He reckoned it would be simple enough. He’d studied the track and the other racers, and he had no doubts about his abilities. TAY-O’s strategy had been flawed anyway; he’d have lost regardless. Tech knew he wouldn’t.

Wrecker started to laugh, thinking this was one of his brother’s attempts at humour but one look at Tech’s face told him this was anything but. “He’s not joking.” He said, his laugh rapidly disappearing to be replaced with concern.

“You heard him. The bet’s still on.” Cid told Millegi firmly.

Tech held the gangster’s stare.

“I never stop a fool from giving his life to make me rich.” Millegi said in response.

Tech entered the pod and examined the controls. Things looked relatively straightforward. He listened to the announcer list the names of his fellow competitors, including Jet Venim, Millegi’s champ and the one who had caused TAY-O to wipe out in the first place. The only brief moment of awkwardness he felt was when the commentator and the crowd seemed confused as to the simplicity of his name. He couldn’t dwell on it though; the race was about to begin. He watched the lights change and the race began.

Tech found himself at the back of the line but that was okay for now. He’d rather get a gauge of the driving strategies and abilities of his competitors and understand the layout of the track more before diving in search of getting that first place.

“What place is he in?” Wrecker asked Omega as they waited in the pitstop.

“Last, but he’s catching up.” Omega said positively as she looked up from her viewing pad.

Wrecker took out his comm, that wouldn’t do at all. “Tech, you gotta be in front to win!” He felt the need to remind him of that crucial detail.

“I know what I am doing. It’s called strategy.” Tech replied breezily.

“No, it’s called losing.” Wrecker retorted.

Tech paid his brother’s words little attention. Contrary to Wrecker’s beliefs, what he was doing was going to ensure his victory. He came out onto the part of the course where there was a choice of three tunnels. It was then he heard Omega’s voice through the comms.

“Tech, don’t take the left tunnel. Cid said it’s a death trap!”

That very idea intrigued him, but he went through the centre tunnel first. “Transfer the schematics of the left tunnel to my display.”

“On it.” Omega replied.

This worried Wrecker though. “Right now? Shouldn’t you just focus on not getting blown up?”

“I can do both.” Tech replied self-assuredly.

He was finally making some headway in the race but the racer behind him was hitting him with some rapid fire.

“Your shields are overheating!” Omega commed in.

This wasn’t an issue though. “Yes. I am allowing for adequate energy to be distributed from weapons to shields.” He explained.

“Tech, they’re all over you.” Omega replied back anxiously.

“I need more speed.” Tech muttered to himself as he studied his monitor. He emerged from the tunnel and pulled off into the pit stop.

“Tech’s coming in.” Omega said.

“Well, what’s he doing?” Wrecker asked as he turned away from the box of tools he was looking at.

Tech didn’t really need to stop though. He released his weapons and kept going.

“Your weapons.” Omega said into her comm.

“They were slowing me down.” Tech responded quickly before he started playing catch up once more. He weaved around the obstacles in the first tunnel and found it a much smoother feat. “That worked. I now have increased speed and manoeuvrability.” He told Omega and Wrecker as a means of reassurance.

“Yeah, that’s great, but you’re still in last place.” Wrecker griped.

“The tunnel’s coming up again.” Omega said before she studied her pad. “Wait. A large part of the track is missing. That’s why the racers avoid it.”

Upon hearing her, Tech glanced down at his dashboard. “It is also the shortest tunnel. I can use it to my advantage.”

“It’s too dangerous. The speeder can’t make that jump!” Omega warned him.

“It will if I’m going fast enough.” Tech hypothesized and when the choice came, he went into the left tunnel.

Wrecker and Omega could only watch on, their nerves increasing each second Tech was in that tunnel.

As the gap in the track approached, Tech veered up one way to gather enough speed and momentum to swing across to the other side and make his driving across the roof of the tunnels an easier task. An easy task for him, but not for the opponent behind him who fell victim to the gaping hole in the track.

He came out of the tunnel to find that he was narrowing in on the lead.

“It worked. You’re closing in!” Omega informed in in relief.

Tech managed to weave his way into runner up and he was closing in on Jet by the second. His shields were being put to the test however as Jet Venim fired on him and he was starting to be boxed in by the racer behind him.

“You’re losing shields.” Omega commed in worriedly.

“Don’t let ‘em box you in!” Wrecker added uneasily as both he and Omega watched the big screen in front of them.

Tech saw on his scope that his two rivals were attempting the same move that had seen them beat TAY-O in the first race, but he wouldn’t be caught out by it. He waited until the last moment before he swerved out of the way of the grappling hook that was aiming to grab the back of his pod. He pulled back and watched as the hook snagged onto Jet’s pod instead and the jagged, circular saw that had been intended for the front of Tech’s vehicle, found a new target instead.

The two pods crashed into each other as all three emerged into the final straight.

“Here they come. It’s going to be close!” The announcer shouted excitedly as clouds of dust erupted from the crash. “And the winner is…”

Wrecker and Omega watched restlessly as they waited for Tech to come through unscathed and as the winner. They let out a collective cheer when they heard Tech’s name come from the announcer and saw his pod come whizzing through the finish line.

Tech left his pod and took his helmet off to greet a rather ecstatic Omega and Wrecker.

“You did it!” Omega yelled happily.

“You sound surprised.” Tech replied plainly. He’d never doubted the outcome of this for a second.

“Yeah!” Wrecker said with a hearty laugh. “I thought you were a goner.”

“Tech! Tech! Tech! Tech! Tech!”

Tech turned back to face the crowd of people that were chanting and cheering his name. Not quite sure how to handle such adoration, he simply gave a small smile and a casual salute of his fingers in acknowledgment.

The three of them walked into Millegi’s bar.

“We’re here for Cid!” Wrecker said firmly as he cracked his neck and knuckles to intimidate the goons around them.

“A deal’s a deal. We’re square.” Millegi pacified.

“That was some racing, Goggles.” Cid said appreciatively. “I, uh, I-I- Well, I guess I owe ya one.” She stumbled over the words clumsily.

“Yes. I would agree.” Tech replied coolly.

“I’ll make it up to ya.” Cid snipped before she pushed Tech’s shoulder. “Come on. We’re outta here.”

As they made their way to follow her out, movement caught Millegi’s attention, and he stopped the Nosaurian from reaching for his blaster. “Hey, you three.”

Tech, Wrecker and Omega turned back to face Millegi.

“You could have walked away. That loyalty is admirable, but with Cid, it doesn’t always go both ways. Watch your backs.”

They said nothing in reply, instead they just walked out with Tech laying a reassuring hand on Omega’s shoulder and Wrecker doing the same to Tech’s. All of them quite happy to leave Safa Toma behind them and in silent agreement that you, Hunter and Echo wouldn’t need to hear about this once you were back from your rather easy mission.

“Cid. I need to talk to you about-”

“Not now, Bandana.” Cid replied grumpily as she walked through to her office.

Hunter sighed but quickly concealed his grimace when he saw Omega and his brothers coming through the door.

“You’re back!” Omega exclaimed happily as she bounded up to where you were sitting.

“Yeah, we’ve been back for a while. Was wondering where you all had gotten too.” You said as you embraced the young girl.

“Where were you?” Hunter asked as Wrecker and Tech came in.

“Oh… uh… we were just helping Cid out with something.” Wrecker stammered awkwardly and ill-prepared to see the three of you back waiting for them.

“What something?” Echo questioned suspiciously.

“Nothing too dangero-”

“Tech became a riot race to pay of Cid’s debt and it was awesome!! He beat everyone and the crowd went crazy!!” Omega revealed excitedly and immediately forgetting that that fact was supposed to be left unsaid. It just seemed too cool a thing to not share.

“You did what?!” The three of you shouted in Tech’s direction.

“It was a relatively simple challenge.” Tech said with a shrug.

“Tech…” You said with a sigh.

“We really cannot leave you three alone.” Echo grumbled with a shake of his head as his hand came across his eyes.

“Low profile. We’re supposed to be keeping a low profile.” Hunter muttered tiredly as he pinched the bridge of his nose in exasperation.

You took Hunter’s free hand and rubbed your thumb across the back of it in comfort. At least you won, I guess but don’t go making a habit of it please. I’m worried about his blood pressure.

Tech gave you a quick smile before he addressed the group. “We have bigger things to be concerned about.” He wasn’t feeling the need to debate the course of action he’d taken. The end result was a success, that was all that mattered to him at the moment and there were more important things to discuss. “We need to talk about Cid.”

“Hmph funny you mention that.” You mumbled.

Wrecker, Tech, and Omega looked at the three of you in curiosity.

“We need to talk about Cid too.” Hunter said. “And uh there’s going to be some changes to our rations.”

Next Chapter>

Tagging: @noeasyisnoisy, @tpwkcalli, @fuckoffthanos, @arctrooper69, @graciexmarvel, @flyingkangaroo, @nightmonkeysstuff, @brujaporfavor, @sunkissedclones, @ladytano420, @dragonrider9905, @keep-calm-and-drink-caf, @yyourmotherr, @xxeiraxx

#the bad batch #the bad batch season 2 #the bad batch s2 #hunter x reader #hunter x fem!reader #hunter x femalejedi!reader #hunter x female!reader #sergeant hunter x reader #sergeant hunter #hunter tbb #hunter the bad batch #the bad batch hunter x you #hunter x y/n #tbb hunter x reader #the bad batch fanfiction #star wars #friends to lovers #fluff #angst

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hjet · 7 months ago

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4/15/24

Today I got to watch four more episodes of Eden of the East including the series finale. Personally, I felt that the anime ending was a little abrupt, I don't know if there were problems with the studio or the creator when this was being finished, but it sort of felt like the original Bleach manga ending where there were tons of loose ends and a lackluster finish.

I did however enjoy learning and interpreting some of the messages in this anime. I feel that the way they were implemented was clever. For instance, one of the messages focused on arguing the idea of downsizing Japan by getting rid of the useless and those who wouldn't give up their own rights to better the overall nation. I felt that this message was very cleverly displayed throughout the anime. After all, one group of these useless people who they wanted to get rid of, the NEETS, ended up being instrumental showing ingenuity and quick thinking in a stressful situation when they collaborated as a group to intercept the missiles that were bearing down on them and the mall.

This directly confronts and contradicts some of the extremists in modern day Japan who believe that Japan has to downsize to only those who would put it back to its Imperial era roots, as they believe this was the best version of Japan. I touched on this in my last paper, which was focused on Zipang and its messages against the extremist values of Imperial Japan as I believe that while it is a minority, it is still a dangerous minority, and I believe that addressing it through this was a smart way to disprove their ideas. Overall, I feel that Eden of the East was a good watch with a solid overall message.

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snowdust64 · 6 months ago

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Ouma Great War Chronicles - Episode 17: The Accomplished and Interesting Kid I Mentioned

Narrator: Nagao, Kaida, and Genzuki calmed the madness of a demon with the Soul-Resting Flute. However, the trio’s cooperative efforts were not aligned, and they missed the kill. At this moment, Kaida pulled out a synthetic talisman, which was in ongoing development.

Kaida: This is not something bestowed by the gods. It’s a synthetic talisman I created!

Nagao: Ohh! That thing you mentioned before. Is it finished?

Kaida: Nah, it’s still a prototype. So let me experiment a little. Haah!

sfx: talisman shining; roar

Kaida: Ah! The feet have been paralyzed!

Genzuki: Kei-kun, do it now!

Nagao: Leave it to me! Haah!

sfx: slashing; roar; collapse

Nagao: Fuhh… We managed to exorcise it. Synthetic talismans, that’s quite handy, huh?

Kaida: Mn, it has enough strength to at least anchor them in place. I’m glad the effect was perceivable.

Nagao: Even when cooperative measures are somewhat disorderly, if we utilize this talisman from now on, we’ll be able to halt them in their tracks, right? Seems like fighting with demons is going to get at least a little bit easier! Heck if I know DeLunacy’s goal, but we gotta come up with more ways to oppose them. *

Genzuki: DeLunacy?

Nagao: The person who’s gotten so enthusiastic about driving demons into madness. Kaida named the devices that cause demons to go mad the Treasure Chests of Lunacy, right? Then, let’s just give the culprit the name DeLunacy.

Genzuki: That is true. Then I guess I’ll call them that too. And it’s easy to understand. That aside, Haru-kun, that talisman just now! Not much time has passed since you said you wanted to create it, and you’ve already finished a prototype.

Kaida: This is also because of the collaboration of my assistant. The success of this research has put e at ease. We’ve got to keep this up, this still a long, long way to go.

Genzuki: Mn. Let’s be mindful about the three of us’ cooperation, and keep fighting together from now on.

Kaida + Nagao: Yeah!

scene change: Bureau Cafeteria

Kaida: Here, eat up plenty. When you’re focused on research, you totally forget about the matter of having meals.

Hinata: That’s not…

Kaida: Subsisting on jelly and energy drinks for a week, who was that again?

Hinata: Uuh… But that was because the research was so fun, I couldn’t help it…

Kaida: I know how you feel, but if you destroy your physical health, everything you’ve worked on and more will go to ruin, you know? Come on now, I’ll treat today, so eat up, eat up. The karaage here is exquisite.

Hinata: Kaida-senpai… Thank you very much, itadakimasu! … mmm! Tastes so good!

Kaida: Fufu, doesn’t it?

sfx: footsteps

Kaida: Hm? That’s…

Genzuki: Ah, Haru-kun. Otsukare-sama. What a coincidence.

Kaida: Aah, Genzuki, I thought it was you. Are you here to eat lunch?

Genzuki: Yep, that’s right… Oh? Who’s the person next to you?

Kaida: Ah, this kids is…

Nagao: Oh, Haru and Toujirou. You guys are also having lunch in the cafeteria today? …er, huh? Here’s an unfamiliar face.

Kaida: Ahaha, perfect, all three of us are together. I’ll introduce you. This is my assistant, Tsubaki Hinata. He’s the accomplished and interesting kid I mentioned.

Hinata: Calling me accomplished… eheh… Ah, my name is Tsubaki Hinata. Pleased to make your acquaintance!

Nagao: Ohh, so you’re Haru’s number one pupil. We’ve heard about you.

Genzuki: We were very much helped by the Soul-Resting Flute. Thank you.

Hinata: Eheheh! Being praised by everyone like this, I’m super honored! The three of you are well known in the imperial capital for your high caliber and you have the great admiration of us young folks!

Genzuki: High caliber, huh… But I’m happy to hear it.

Nagao: … hmm? (Huh, what is this uneasiness? Did he say Tsubaki Hinata? Is it his manner of speech or his body language… I’m inexplicably stuck on something. No, no! This is the first time we’re meeting, and moreover he’s Kaida’s assistant. I couldn’t possibly feel this way…)

Kaida: Nagao? Is something wrong?

Nagao: Oh, no, it’s nothing. Pleased to meet you, Tsubaki.

Hinata: Y-yes!

Kaida: Because of Hinata’s cooperation, research is progressing on schedule. You two make him feel welcome, okay?

Genzuki: Mn.

Hinata: You seem way out of my league, but… I look forward to working with you.

Nagao: Yeah.

Genzuki: Looking forward to it.

Hinata: Excuse me then, Kaida-senpai. Thank you for the lunch!

Kaida: Ehh!? You’re already done eating!?

Hinata: Yes! I’d like to continue with my research a little more. See you!

==========

Translation notes

* Nagao’s nickname for the culprit is a play on words – well, a play on grammar. To recap, Kaida named the box-shaped devices Kyouki no Tamatebako -> Treasure Chest of Lunacy, with a pun on the word for ‘lunacy’ that includes the kanji for ‘demon.’ My translation worked out so that in both Japanese and English, the grammar can be reinterpreted to mean a Treasure Chest belonging to someone named Lunacy. I settled on DeLunacy for the culprit’s nickname. It serves as a contraction of ‘demon lunacy’ but also has a structure like those European surnames that begin with de, di, etc., meaning ‘of.’

#ouma great war chronicles #vδlz #nagao kei #kaida haru #genzuki tojiro #nijisanji #english translation #ouma taisen tan

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jadelotusflower · 3 months ago

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@ravenya003 I miss message boards for longform discussion!

I don’t think people realize how much of a relief it is to the brain to just accept reality instead of working around CGI and bluescreen all the time.

When they made it to Aldhani I was like finally, some good fucking locations! The Ferrix set was incredible - it had nooks and crannies! And a sense of physical and relational space!

But really, has anything bad happened to an important droid in a SW film/show? I can’t think of any. They're like the franchise equivalent of pet dogs: too beloved to get killed off in what's (on some level) a story for young people.

That's true, I suppose with Andor being billed as a "darker" take on Star Wars, and the knowledge that K-2SO was coming down the pipeline I expected B2EMO to be an early loss for Cassian in his journey - I was very happy to be wrong!

Watching people complain that it was slow to start with made me roll my eyes, as there’s not a single second wasted on this show.

I'm honestly baffled by the complaints of the first episodes being slow - so much happens! It's worth taking the time to introducing us to Ferrix, its culture and community, and its characters, given the importance it has in the final episode. Not to harp on the point, but from a modern perspective the first act of A New Hope is slow too - it's almost 20 minutes before we even meet our protagonist! But it works because it draws the viewer into an unfamiliar world and sets up everything we need to know.

This was also interesting to me; that the piecemeal nature of the Rebellion at this point is reflected in the uncertainty of Cassian himself: he doesn’t know what he wants or who he wants to be at this stage – the Rebellion grows in strength as he grows in conviction, which is a nice Doylistic mirror between the macro and microcosm – AND is further demonstrated in the opening title, during which the music becomes more booming and powerful and structured with each episode.

That's a good point, and perhaps also relevant is that many of the disparate rebel elements are motivated by very different agendas at odds over how and why they're opposing the Empire, while Cassian ultimately settles on the distilled and focused goal that will drive the Alliance to eventual victory: the destruction and defeat of the Imperial regime. Join or die.

This is why I’ve been a little on the fence about The Acolyte (admittedly I haven’t seen yet; I’m only responding to what I’ve heard) which seems to be about how the Jedi are deeply flawed and the Dark Side makes some good points.

Oof, The Acolyte is a whole other post! Without spoilers, the vitriol it has received is completely unwarranted, but it's not deserving of great praise either - certainly not as profound and nuanced as it thinks it is, as I had my fill of "what if using the dark side was justified, actually?" back in the legends eu. Ultimately it falls into the same trap as a lot of SW projects - interesting ideas, flawed execution.

I can easily imagine that Gilroy cut down on the amount of aliens that could have been involved, since he wanted this to be a “serious human drama.” Which… okay dude, but it’s Star Wars.

Yeah, I found the "human drama" thing a bit off because it implies the audience can't see through makeup or costumes to take non-human characters seriously, which is demonstrably untrue in this franchise perhaps more than any other.

And yet the Empire would have certainty been using alien slave labour every chance they got, and places like Coruscant should have at least had some alien extras in the background. And would it have killed them to have at least one person on the Aldani heist with antennae or an extra hand or something?

I actually think the perfect place would have been Narkina 5, if the floors were segregated between humans and non-humans (and perhaps even between male and female), which would have given even more power to the prisoners finding a way to communicate with each other, and ultimately all working together to escape in defiance of the Empire trying to keep them apart.

In many ways, this is a story of radicalization: how and why it happens, and whether it can be considered a good thing. We already know that he’ll eventually be all-in on this cause and that it will cost him his life, but that it won’t be a sacrifice made in vain. Hovering over this entire show is the question: “is it worth it?” For me, this tracking of an individual’s radicalization was the crux of his arc, and one of the main points of the show.

I appreciate your perspective! I do agree, I like Cassian's character, and his arc in the show, I just wanted a bit more from it - nothing big and flashy, but just a bit more interiority and meat to his development and evolution from a reactive character to an active one. I'm sorry to again bring this back to the OT, but we see Luke be radicalized from "I have responsibilities and there's nothing I can do about the Empire" to "I'm going to burn this whole system down" in ten minutes - obviously vastly different character and circumstances to Cassian for whom it was never going to be that black and white, but this season had 12 episodes, the equivalent of a film trilogy of runtime, so I'm just left with a feeling of what else? Again, this probably wouldn't bother me if there was another four seasons to build all these different characters and storylines that would coalesce over time, and you're probably right that with only one more season Cassian's full backstory will be the first sacrifice to the shortened runtime.

I often wonder how Luthen would have played if he’d been a woman or an alien or a person of colour.

Rather than every fanboy's favourite character, there would have been endless youtube videos about woke agenda and how Luthen emasculated Cassian or some other such nonsense.

I feel by the end he was deliberately positioned as a foil to Maarva, who was able to incite a riot without any deceit or manipulation, but by only speaking the truth, a point which may well come into play in the second season.

My take was that Luthen was more rattled than he cared to admit by Maarva’s speech – like I said, here’s a woman that is able to incite rebellion WITHOUT any Machiavellian schemes, and – knowing she was Cassian’s mother – decides to let him go.

Interesting! I'll have to keep that in mind if I do a rewatch. There's something to be said of direct action as opposed to cloak-and-dagger scheming - both valid approaches, and both ultimately will be needed for eventual victory, and I wonder how much Mon Mothma will come to be a surrogate Maarva for Cassian, given we know she ultimately does tire of subterfuge and denounce the Empire in a call for open rebellion not unlike Maarva did (on a much larger scale).

It’s interesting, because I knew at least one viewer who disliked Rogue One precisely because of this mentality – the idea that the Rebels had to engage in underhanded tactics in order to secure their victory, when he believed that the OT was so based upon very “clean” black and white moral underpinnings that depicting the Rebellion as guerillas and saboteurs and assassins was undermining the story as a whole.

Huh, I mean the whole franchise opened with the rebels "striking from a hidden base" and the high body count of the Death Star blowing up (however mitigated as a military target/self-defence) - the Rebellion was always depicted as a paramilitary/guerilla force.

I can’t say I agree as Star Wars is very compartmentalized in a lot of ways, but I do enjoy the question it poses: it’s easy to make your life a sacrifice, but what if your morality/humanity IS the sacrifice?

It raises a lot of interesting questions, especially when the realities of the Rebellion and the ends-justify-the-means approach is the antithesis of Jedi philosophy, for which the Alliance ostensibly has respect (although "may the force be with us" is probably akin to "may fate go our way" more than anything else). Luthen and Cassian have the luxury (if you can call it that) of sacrificing their morality for the greater good while a Jedi couldn't because of the danger of the dark side. But it is compelling that ultimately Cassian does reject that approach when he disobeys the order to shoot Galen - it will be interesting to see how he gets from "all in" at the end of season 1 to this point in Rogue One.

RIGHT??!! I was rather baffled by this, as well as the actress’s interview in which she states the audience was meant to initially see her as the underdog up against the sexist work environment she was surrounded by (and subsequently root for her) only for her torture of Bix to make you realize “oh right, she’s a victim of sexism AND an evil imperial. You can be both!”

I've seen this take in fandom as well and it's bizarre! It's like there's this almost fetishization of competence that makes it commendable even when, you know, fascists doing fashy things are still bad no matter how efficiently they do them? It's not like Dedra was making seemingly innocuous bureaucratic moves with a reveal that they were anything but - she was explicitly hunting the rebel characters from the very beginning! We can appreciate her skill and strength as a character, but she was always positioned as villainous to me.

This show didn’t do Easter eggs, but I do like to think on some level they wanted to get in a “hitherto unknown familial connection between two characters” link as a homage to the Skywalker twins. And of course, the fact that it really doesn’t make much of a difference as to whether Vel/Mon were cousins or not was somehow very funny.

I was constantly anticipating a family reveal with someone, but it actually made sense to link in Mon and Vel as connective tissue with Luthen, rather than a hokey "surprise! they're siblings!" twist would have been.

I know I’ve said this to you before, but Rogue One itself had the perfect examples of this: the little cameo from C3PO and R2D2 was fine, because it made sense they’d be there and it was only a few seconds long, but earlier in the film everything grounds to a halt so they can showcase the two cantina aliens from Tatooine – which makes NO SENSE, because Jedha is about to be blown to smithereens! We’re just meant to point and say “hey, those guys!”

Not all fanservice is created equal.

Ugh, not only that, the cringe dialogue callback (callforward?) to ANH makes it so much worse, who was this even for? Although I'm sure there's ancillary material detailing how those idiots made it from Jedha to Tatooine somewhere.

Strange comparison, but it’s a bit like how the writers for the BBC Robin Hood were so eager to get rid of the old guard and shoehorn in their bright shiny new characters that they forgot to give anyone a reason to care about Kate, Tuck, Archer, Isabella, etc. They just plonked them in and hoped no one would notice they’d just thrown out everything we’d invested in for the past two years.

Oh, but Kate was ever so plucky, how could we not love her? /s

It reveals a fundamental lack of creativity. Even the fact that the whole reason they shoved Luke to that island in the ST was because they admitted to being unable to integrate him into the story without overshadowing the new characters - first, if that's the case, maybe that's a sign he should be central to the story, and second, if your new characters aren't strong enough to stand beside the old ones, workshop them until they are!

With so many nostalgia-fuelled properties it's interesting to see how few have threaded the needle between just giving the what you loved before, again and telling a new story - the failures seem to be conflating the two and telling the same story again with new characters, which doesn't really hit the nostalgia fix and that's why they slather it with easter egg window dressing.

Archer is a good example - they expected us to care about him because he was Robin and Guy's brother and this where I think a lot of nostalgia-bait fails. Being related to the OG characters isn't enough, there needs to be connection and core to the relationship. Generational storytelling can be powerful but not because of bloodline but because of familial bonds - we want to follow the next generation because we care about the characters and their continued journey. This is where the ST fundamentally faltered in framing the Skywalkers as a dynasty rather than a family.

Weirdly, one that has seemed to found a balance is Cobra Kai, which in many ways is Fanservice: The Show, chock full of silly callbacks with a slavish reverence to the source material. And yet that doesn't bother me so much, because they have managed to maintain and develop the original characters while building the next generation effectively. While the show is certainly not without its flaws, it does feel like the world and characters have progressed in an engaging way, we are seeing the next arc in the journey of these characters rather than starting over. We live in a world where the Karate Kid continuation was better received than the Star Wars one - if you'd told me that ten years ago I would have never believed it.

(I promise I did not bring up Robin Hood just to point out that the Aldani leader who led the pilgrimage under the Eye was the same actor who played the Abbott in the third episode of season three).

I did not notice that! I'm definitely going to have to rewatch in the leadup to season 2.

So I finally watched Andor...

...and naturally I have thoughts (hey, it’s me). Maybe they're belated, seeing as this show was released almost two years ago, but I've been on the outskirts of the Star Wars fandom for a while now. This in and of itself isn't usual - I tend to drift between my core fandoms in phases, but since TLJ the GFFA hasn't really been a pleasant place to be so I haven't really had a reason to drift back to it for any length of time.

Which isn't to say I've avoided Star Wars altogether, dipping in when something piques my interest like Obi-Wan Kenobi (which I liked aspects of but ultimately felt like just a setup to the show I actually wanted to watch), and have absorbed some of the rest through cultural osmosis. Andor is a show I've been meaning to get to for a while, although it has been praised to the point of being overhyped (and there was a whiff of Not Like Other Star Wars to the critical reception) so I was concerned it would not meet expectations.

But I was pleasantly surprised as how much this show felt spiritually and aesthetically in tune with the original trilogy, and especially A New Hope, as opposed to Disney!Star Wars. Even if the tone and content of Andor is very different, it feels in conversation with the OT in a way the rest of Disney’s output has not - building on the story we already know, rather than trying replace or rewrite it as something else.

Aesthetically, we have the 70's vibe of the set design and costuming in middle-class Coruscant, the stark white jumpsuits and surrounds of Narkina 5 evoking Lucas's early film THX-1138, even the way we are plopped right into the middle of the story with very little exposition, but still eased into the narrative is very reminiscent of the first act of A New Hope. Thematically, of course we’re seeing the Rebellion in its earlier stages - small disparate cells of seditious activity directly acting against Imperial interests that will become the somewhat ragtag but nonetheless organised and unified Alliance.

While Star Wars was a cinema pastiche throwback to Flash Gordan serials and Campbell’s hero’s journey as an antidote to the grimdark antiheroes of the 70’s, in many ways Andor brings things back full circle to the grit of neo-noir. It holds a mirror up to the OT and lets us see the other side of the coin - and the full cost of victory. So many people have to die for Cassian to make it to the Rebellion - just like Cassian himself will die for the Death Star plans to make it to Leia, like Obi-Wan will die to ensure those plans make it to the Rebellion, and squadrons of rebel pilots will die so Luke can ultimately destroy the Death Star.

A stone is dropped in a pond, and we see the ripples but the stone itself sinks.

Overall thoughts

Tony Gilroy is the showrunner here, a veteran screenwriter notable for the Bourne films, and we can certainly see this influence at work. He also wrote The Devil’s Advocate, which is by no means good but I do enjoy in all its ott mythological monologues-and-accents glory, and seminal romcom (of my childhood at least) The Cutting Edge. He also wrote and directed Michael Clayton, which I have not seen but was nominated for several Oscars, including Original Screenplay, Director, and Best Picture (Tilda Swinton won for Supporting Actress).

Of course he's also a credited screenwriter on Rogue One, and I understand his contribution was mostly to the infamous rewrites/reshoots. I desperately want to read a full breakdown/bts of what went down with that film (well all of Disney-led Lucasfilm really) and see the deleted/original material, because I am fascinated. It's also interesting to note that Gilroy took over showrunning duties from Stephen Schiff pre-production. The show does very much feel like Gilroy wanted to make his own stamp on the Andor character and use him as a vehicle in his spy-thriller/political intrigue wheelhouse.

Reading some of Gilroy’s comments around the series had made me wonder how much of Andor being reflective/referential to the OT was intentional (on his part at least), and arguably Gilroy did overwrite the character of Cassian Andor so…there’s nuance. But as a story, to me it felt in tune with what I love about Star Wars rather than at odds with it, and that's what I appreciated most.

But first things first. B2EMO made it to the end! Finally, my expectations are subverted in a good way, because I love this little droid with all my heart. There are several key elements of Star Wars to me that separate it from other sci-fi/space fantasy and that is Jedi, distinctive aliens, and sentient droids. Obviously there's no Jedi here (nor does there need to be), my issues with the lack of aliens I'll address below, but when it comes to droids B2EMO fits right in, and we can assume is a precursor to Cassian's relationship with K-2SO.

Overall I thought the show was excellent (with a few caveats). What's impressive is the sheer number of characters and plots interwoven together, every conversation servicing character, the overall theme or setting something up that will pay off later, playing with coincidence and fate (the will of the Force), the interlocking domino effect. Arvel Skeen recognising the tattoo on Cassian's arm leads to a conversation of his history, but also sets up Skeen later offering to take and split the haul with Cassian (and getting killed for it). The raid on Aldhani triggers the Empire’s harsh new measures that gets Cassian sentenced to six years in prison, but also inspires the rebellion on Ferrix (via Maarva). The Aldhani heist is a triumph for Vel, but traps Mon’s financial contributions to the Rebellion by the Empire’s crackdown on banking, leading her and her daughter into an unwanted family alliance.

I'm a big proponent of Star Wars Dialogue is Good, Actually - not saying there's not clunkers or stilted scenes (the PT moreso than the OT) but there seems to be this weird consensus that Lucas-era dialogue sucks despite being some of the most quoted/referenced movies of all time. Lucas was creating a modern myth, of course a lot of it is arch and operatic. I love the dialogue in Andor too - which rightly gets high praise, and while it's arguably tighter, in many ways it's no more naturalistic than that of the Saga with everyone constantly speaking in metaphor, it's just pitched differently because this is a different genre (and the acting is uniformly excellent because they are actually interacting with each other and being competently directed).

There’s layers of meaning in almost every scene and subtle moments of foreshadowing that I really enjoy - Karis Nemik muses on the role of mercenaries in a rebellion that must use every tool and weapon at its disposal, and obviously Cassian starts out as that mercenary who will be pulled into the wider struggle, but this also foreshadows the importance of Han Solo - at first only out for the promise of a reward but ultimately instrumental in bringing the Empire down. But it’s not because he’s treated as a tool - as the Empire treats its workforce as tools - but because he’s treated as worthwhile, he’s valued as a person. The Empire casts people out while the Rebellion draws them in.

We also see this in the arc on Narkina 5, and the Empire’s tightening grip backfiring against them. In order to force the prisoners to speedily produce parts for the Death Star they work in close-knit teams, creating a close camaraderie ultimately allowing them to escape - because when you turn people into cogs of a machine, the machine can be turned back against you. Contrast this to the jockeying over position and territory and power in the ISB - they serve the Empire, but never at personal cost.

We see the Republic of affiliated systems from the PT turn into an Empire of conquered planets, where local cultures are subsumed into homogeneous Imperial rule. Even Corpsec is replaced by Imperial oversight, and we know that the Senate on Coruscant will be dissolved completely in ANH. But ultimately this ferments rebellion and unites the outcast and oppressed - the Keredians on Narkina 5 hate the Empire for their prison polluting the waterways, and so let Cassian and Melchi go. Cinta’s whole family was killed by stormtroopers turning her single minded focus to destroying them. The people of Ferrix respond to Maarva’s call and riot against the Imperial forces even though it will mean violent reprisal.

The Empire forges the weapons that will be used against them. As Nemik’s manifesto states: “The Imperial need for control is so desperate because it is so unnatural. Tyranny requires constant effort. It breaks, it leaks. Authority is brittle. Oppression is the mask of fear.”

And yet we're not there yet - it's important that this is still a Rebellion and not an Alliance, a disparate collection of segmented sedition with a myriad of agendas we see run by Saw Gerrara, Anton Kreegyr, Luthen Rael. They won't be a genuine threat to the Empire until they join forces, share resources and intelligence, and unite behind a collective goal. Although there may be sacrifices in this as well - Separatists, Partisan Front, Sectorists etc mentioned by Saw will either coalesce under the Alliance to Restore the Republic or be driven further to the fringes.

The thrust of Nemik's manifesto is that freedom is a natural state of being, while oppression is unnatural, and even though Andor has nothing to do with the Jedi it nonetheless echoes their philosophy: that the Force is in a natural state of balance, while the existence of the Sith who tap into the Dark Side upset this balance. As we see in Return of the Jedi, the balance is ultimately restored by the return to that natural state buffeted by the most powerful forces - friendship, love, sacrifice - forces that ultimately drive Cassian as well. While much has been said of the moral ambiguity and nuance of Andor, it's not incongruent with the OT, if anything it reinforces its power and message.

HOWEVER, I have my nits to pick - the lack of aliens is a serious flaw (and in particular, the lack of familiar aliens). In some cases they can get away with it and make subtle commentary - Coruscant is stark and grey as the centre of bureaucracy in stark contrast to the vibrant metropolis of the PT. Seeing the streets populated almost exclusively by humans where once it was a melting pot underscores the Empire’s segregationist policies. However the dearth of non-humans elsewhere - Ferrix, Aldhani, even the prison labour camp Narkina 5 - is disconcerting. These are places meant to depict the oppressive rule of the Empire and this undermines the strength of the rebellion as a group of diverse species fighting against the Imperial monoculture. It's odd, for example, that we see all the characters from Ferrix return except Vetch, the muscle employed "just to stand there" by Nurchi (a nice moment with Cassian!), and that Maarva's funeral procession seems entirely human.

Ultimately, I think the setup is much stronger than the payoff, and while I appreciate the slow burn, the show does have sometimes have difficulty juggling the plots. Once set up, characters are parked waiting to be incorporated into the narrative (it feels like we watch Syril stare at his cereal forever) and looking back not much actually happens to a lot of them- there are a lot of threads left hanging and not much resolution. Which is of course because this was only intended to be season 1 of 5, with each arc a year of Cassian’s life leading up to Rogue One. But sadly Andor has been given a second season only, leaving 12 episodes to wrap everything up, so ultimately I fear the show will feel like a slow setup and rushed conclusion, which is a real shame.

Cassian Andor

I’m went into this as someone who doesn’t really have a strong connection to Cassian as a character - I certainly liked him in Rogue One! But let’s just say he’s not my blorbo. And this not the backstory I would have expected for the character five years before Rogue One as someone who has “been in this fight since [he] was six years old.”

Diego Luna has such a charismatic presence and it is nice to have a more internal, insular character, but it’s kind of sad that Cassian is really the least developed character in a show ostensibly about him. It’s not really his story, but he’s the fulcrum (pun intended) around which most of the other characters pivot; this is a story of the rebellion of which he is just one part. So, I can see if Cassian fans may have been upset by his lack of focus, and I personally would have wanted to delve a bit deeper into Cassian Andor on a show called Andor, you know? And it does feel a little bit skeevy that the actual Axis (pun intended) of the show is Luthen in his middle age white man glory, with a whiff of Gilroy’s self-insert about him.

I do wish LFL would abandon simply naming their shows after the main character - presumably it’s for general audience recognition and algorithmic reasons, but my god how boring. If the show had been marketed as the ensemble it actually is I would take less issue with the lack of Cassian focus. But sadly I’m not sure we know that much more about Cassian at the end of the show than we did at the end of the first three episodes - or really, what it adds to his character and arc we see in Rogue One.

Yes he’s further radicalised by his experiences and is now presumably "all in" on the rebellion, but the events of the show are kicked off by Cassian searching for his sister which is a motivation that is all but dropped thereafter - although at one point I was half-expecting (dreading) it to be revealed that Luthen's assistant Kleya Marki was Kerri (and sidebar, Kleya - what a stone cold bitch! I love a stone cold bitch).

This plot will likely continue in season 2, but it felt a bit undercooked and too deep in the subtext given the prominence it had in kicking off the narrative. We get a flashback to Cassian’s childhood, but ultimately it feels like lipservice to his Indigenous heritage rather than true engagement since we don't see him reflect on it in any way, nor does it seem to have any impact on his choices throughout the series that seem primarily motivated by his life and relationships on Ferrix.

We get a strong start to Cassian and Luthen that peters out - he's intent on recruiting Cassian, but then writes him off when Cassian flees after Aldhani and wants him killed, then goes all the way to Ferrix for him, but is about to leave without actually doing anything? I know Luthen's meant to be ambiguous, but this is one area where plot is obviously driving things not character. I get that it was important for Cassian to be the one to go to Luthen at the end and choose the Rebellion unfetted, but the relationship is undercooked. I almost feel like the series is a procession of things that happen to Cassian rather than a journey I was on with him. There's external forces, but very little internal focus.

However, what I did love about the show was the thematic resonance that was happening on a macro and micro level - while the show as a whole is a mirror/reflection of the OT, we also see dichotomy in the character pairings that are mirrors and/or foils of each other in various ways - we have the two sides of the conflict being Empire and Rebellion (with Cassian stuck in the middle), and we are also shown conflict within those two sides.

Cassian is without a reflective character pairing because his true mirror is Jyn Erso, and seeing Cassian’s struggles here does give real weight to his “you’re not the only one who lost everything” speech - in many ways the show is his journey from being Jyn, to being the man who says to her “we don't all have the luxury of deciding when and where we want to care about something.”

Mon Mothma and Luthen Rael

The most obvious mirror/foil pair as the two sides of the Rebellion, although arguably we have a third prong in Saw Gerrara, and kind of a mirror in Luthen as Cassian’s mentor as Saw was Jyn’s - and I do wonder about the show that was a two-handed prequel with Cassian and Jyn growing up in different factions of the Rebellion, but alas.

The artifact Luthen gives Mon represents “a sun goddess and a serpent sharing the same mouth” representing their differing philosophical approach to fighting the Empire. As mirror characters they are alike in many ways - both of the privileged class and living double lives on Coruscant, but while Mon makes political efforts to move the needle on the Empire's activities in the Senate while also funneling money to direct but small rebel efforts, Luthen outright pokes the bear, sacrifices allies, and knowingly making things worse to swell the ranks of the rebellion on the hope it will speed up progress. There's more than a hint of the incrementalism/revolutionary dichotomy here.

It also raises a lot of interesting questions without (rightly) providing many answers - the struggle of the oppressed, the moral weight of insurgency and revolution. Is it right to intentionally provoke an oppressive power into reacting with violence in order to fuel a greater pushback against them? Is short term suffering justified if it achieves eventual victory, and is it right for the few to decide what is a justifiable sacrifice? What are our responsibilities to each other under the threat of/struggle against authoritarianism? As social commentary it's more timely than ever.

Whether Mon or Luthen is right for the viewer to decide, although as Leia tells Tarkin in ANH: "the more you tighten your grip, the more star systems will slip through your fingers." On the other hand, we know Mon survives to the end of the Empire while Luthen (I assume) will not. She will become a leading figure in the Alliance, and eventual Chancellor of the New Republic, while he will be another stone at the bottom of the pond.

This is foreshadowed in the dialogue (with a direct mirror reference):

“I’m condemned to use the tools of my enemy to defeat them. I burn my decency for someone else’s future. I burn my life, to make a sunrise that I know I’ll never see. No, the ego that started this fight will never have a mirror, or an audience, or the light of gratitude."

Arguably however, the mirror is the show - we are the audience.

We know Cassian joins Luthen at the end of season 1, and will meet Mon in season 2, so it will be interesting to see him struggle between these two philosophies, although we can infer from Rogue One that he aligns himself (out of necessity) with Luthen's veiwpoint:

"We've all done terrible things on behalf of the Rebellion. Spies, saboteurs, assassins....And every time I walked away from something I wanted to forget, I told myself it was for a cause that I believed in. A cause that was worth it. Without that, we're lost."

Ultimately, the Rebellion needs people like Luthen and Cassian to make not only the physical sacrifice, but the moral one as well (noting our first introduction to Cassian is him killing an informant so he can escape) - people who play the Empire's game so Luke can ultimately reject the Emperor's.

But I had mixed feelings on the Mon Mothma storyline. It feels a bit off for Luthen to be her entrée into the Rebellion, when we know she’s been on the ground from the very beginning with the Petition of the 2000 (cut from ROTS, but still canon I assume). She just felt very isolated and fragile which is at odds with her quiet steel that we see in Return of the Jedi and Rogue One. I could maybe see this Mon in the early dark days, but only 5 years before ANH? A scene with Bail Organa would not have gone amiss just to give breadth to her rebellious activities.

We get to see Luthen visit Saw Gerrara on Segra Milo, why not give Mon a scene with Bail to show she has other irons in the fire rather than relying on Luthen? In Saw we see the rough and tumble of disparate rebel factions, I would have liked to see the political machinations of Mon and Bail to serve the metaphor even further.

She is more than just a bank for the rebellion, and I think in the effort to contrast Luthen and Mon there was a bit of disservice done to the latter.

And Mon’s loser husband - ugh. Okay they’re in some kind of arranged marriage but there’s very little substance, nothing us particularly revealed about Mon by including him. Other than her cleverly using his gambling debts to deflect her rebellion spending at the end, the story wouldn’t really have changed by him not existing, and in fact would have been improved by focusing more on Mon’s difficult relationship with her daughter.

But on a purely shallow note, I want her wardrobe!

Dedra Meero and Syril Karn

In some ways Cassian and Syril are the narrative foils and there are parallels between them - their conflict instigated in the first episodes, their maternal relationships, both essentially exiles for the middle section before both end up back on Ferrix where Cassian saves Bix and Syril saves Dedra. But I feel Syril and Dedra work better as mirrors, and their arcs also parallel and intersect.

In the Empire, Dedra and Syril are two sides of the other coin (there's quite a few coins in this metaphor). Regimes need bureaucracy, and you have the true believers, the status-climbers, and those just going along to get along. In Dedra we have the talented star of the prestigious Imperial Security Bureau, and in Syril the over eager Corporate Security officer, two arms of the Empire’s control, although the latter we see becoming obsolete as the former gains more control.

But they're both middlemen who chafe against the inaction of their superiors, both desperate to rise above their station (although those stations are quite far apart). Throughout the series their plots are mostly in parallel; they are reflections of each other without even having met.

It's uncomfortable to watch both of them on screen - all unblinking stares, sucked in cheeks, and pursed lips - fittingly repellent. I’m surprised Gilroy has said he wrote Dedra to be relatable - she skeeved me out from the first, someone clearly ready to step over anyone and everyone if it served her purposes rather than someone gradually drawn further into an authoritarian regime. There's the slight subtext of sexism - there's only one other women in the ISB briefing and Pendergast alludes to it, but that certainly didn't engender any sympathy or admiration from me.

In episode 7 Syril’s mother Eedy says “Everything says something, Syril” and chastises him about tailoring his uniform (just as he did in the first episode, a neat little character tell), and immediately after we see Dedra donning her uniform perfectly in sync with the rest of the ISB. He’s trying to stand out from the crowd, she’s trying to fit in - or, from a different perspective, Syril adjusts his collar to resemble the Imperial style as a signifier of where he wants to be, while Dedra is already there and still looking higher.

But both are thinking outside the rigid Imperial lines and command structures, both on the hunt for Cassian - although for Syril it's personal and Dedra it's about climbing the ranks. Both take it upon themselves to investigate against orders, but Syril’s attempts are clumsy and random while Dedra’s are clinical and targeted.

She identifies that “systems either change or die” to push the ISB’s fragmented and bureaucratic inefficiencies into a cohesive power structure, but while it wins her approval it doesn’t earn her any loyalty; her troops abandon her to the mob on Ferrix. Inexplicably though, Syril does manage to gain the loyalty of Sergeant Mosk, who was also punished for the initial blunder on Ferrix, but ultimately draws Syril back there to in search of Cassian.

The point at which they first intersect in episode 8, Dedra is on an upswing, she holds the power and sends Syril further down, but when they meet again in episode 11, the roles are reversed as he is the one to save her from the mob.

I just hope they’re going somewhere more interesting than his creepy crush.

Vel Sartha and Cinta Kaz

One of the major faults of Rogue One was its Smurfette Syndrome, where Jyn is a great female character surrounded by men, but Andor has pleasingly course corrected from this. See what happens when you don’t have one woman having to embody everything and bear the weight of her entire gender in the narrative (and therefore, also bear the criticism)? Andor happily treats its women as characters, not faux-empowering meme-fodder. Although there is perhaps some valid commentary that it’s still white women on the whole - Dedra, Mon, Vel, Maarva - who get the meatier roles, and I have my issues with Mon’s characterisation, but one thing I will give Disney LFL credit for is it’s ongoing efforts towards gender parity.

In Vel and Cinta we have two more sides of insurgency - from wealth and privilege in Vel, the cousin of Mon Mothma struggling with the weight of it all, to Cinta with her cold fire and unwavering drive, her family killed by stormtroopers and for whom the struggle will always come first.

Cinta’s cool reserve is a contrast to Vel’s nerves (as seen in the Aldhani raid); they’re coming from very different places even if their cause is the same. There may even be a bit of classism in the subtext - Vel leads the mission on Aldhani after asking for the mission from Luthen, when really Cinta is the one who is most committed, and she has to push Vel though several times when she falters.

Vel still has one foot in the Imperial world and the complications of rebellious machinations - worried for Mon and her family, wanting to prove herself to Luthen, jockeying with Kleya - but for Cinta none of that matters, she loves Vel but there's often a sense she's disappointed in her. There's a dichotomy within Cinta - she's not unfeeling, showing kindness to Cassian when he joins their group, yet accepting the mission to kill him later without hesitation.

It seems to me that Cinta is the revolutionary Vel wants to be but can't quite divest herself of enough to become - the metaphor is made explicit with these two - Cinta tells Vel: “I’m a mirror. You love me because I show you what you need to see.”

Which is a pretty interesting dynamic, especially as a romantic one, and I’m interested to see where it will go (and hope that Cinta will get more focus, even though I do love Vel a lot too).

Their storyline did run out of steam by the end through, was there any point to either of these characters being on Ferrix at the end? It very much felt like all the plot lines were being forced to intersect at the climax without all of them necessarily needing to. Although Cinta stabbing that guy in the heart was pretty cathartic.

Bix Callen, Maarva Andor, and Ferrix

I loved Ferrix as a location, with its own distinct aesthetic, culture, and populace - the work gloves all hung on the wall, the metal tapping warning system, the daily hammer and anvil (the Time Grappler, according to Wookieepedia), funerary practices. etc. The first few episodes set up Cassian’s community on Ferrix which we come full circle on in the final two, but I did have some trouble keeping track of who was who at that point.

It is interesting that the trope of “just another brick in the wall” is turned on its head here - rather than representing a cog in the machine, in Ferrix ashes of the deceased are mixed with brick and added to a wall in remembrance - a literal touchstone for Cassian as he remembers his adoptive father Clem. A wall is strong, a bulwark against outside forces, and every brick added makes it stronger. Stones dropped in a pond, bricks built into a wall - reminders of the dead that spur the will to fight.

I do love the relationship between Maarva and Cassian, especially in a franchise that has never really had an interest in mothers and sons. And we have another mirror in the overcritical and cold relationship between Syril and Eedy as the inverse of Cassian’s complicated but loving one with Maarva - contrast the reception Syril gets when he returns home to the one Cassian gets from Maarva, as ultimately Eedy's pointed disappointment is sharp where Maarva's is borne from love and concern for Cassian.

But again there’s a disconnect with the history we’re shown - Maarva and Clem kidnap/save Kassa from Kenari but we don’t really get any sense of how Cassian feels about it or the connection he has to his heritage/childhood. I’m not saying I need everything spelled out, but sometimes I feel the show does err too much on the side of subtext, and as a result we don’t delve as deep into some of the relationships as we could have. Even her final message to Cassian - that she loves him more than anything he could ever do wrong - is a beautiful sentiment, but is it earned? He hasn't really done anything wrong, arguably she did wrong by him by taking him from Kenari but it's never even mentioned, it doesn’t even seem to be a factor in their relationship as adults.

On the other hand, I didn’t mind the treatment of the post-romantic relationship between Cassian and Bix - there’s a sense of history there but it didn’t need to be explored further. Bix's involvement in the Rebellion is interesting though, it's implied she was recruited by Kleya through the black market but are her motives purely profit or does she have rebellious fervor? Luthen knows of Cassian through Bix - did she see him as a candidate for the Rebellion or just another person from whom Luthen could obtain tech? What piqued Luthen's interest from what Bix said about him?

I don't think all these questions need answers, but it is unfortunate that she does get a bit Damseled, spending most of the runtime threatened, captured, and then tortured. On the other hand, there's less to criticise in employing that trope when it's not the only one at work and the breadth of female characters on the show.

I do wonder if we will see Bix, Brasso, and B2EMO again though, or if they’re a part of Cassian’s past he had to leave behind to fully commit himself to the Rebellion.

On nostalgia, fanservice, and the state of the Star Wars universe

A tangent into my frustrations with the sequel trilogy, skip if you’re allergic to salt.

Andor has been lauded for its lack of fanservice, although I’d actually argue it’s a show that (perhaps despite Gilroy's intention) is rooted in nostalgia. Well, perhaps not nostalgia per se, but it’s a show that relies on the audience’s knowledge and affection of Rogue One and the Original Trilogy, and it’s successful because it manages to feel authentic and fulfilling rather than ham-fisted and overly meta - a story set in the Star Wars universe, not about the Star Wars universe.

I know Gilroy intended this to be able to stand alone, but would the story have the same resonance if we weren't aware where Cassian's path leads, that the efforts and actions of Mon and Luthern, Vel and Cinta, Nemik, Bix and Kleya, are ultimately justified? Perhaps it would work in a generic sci-fi setting rather than the GFFA, but would we feel as much watching it? Personally, I think not.

Because nostalgia isn’t inherently bad. It’s a vital part of how we consume media - the stories that resonate with us in childhood will continue to resonate in adulthood because they are foundational, it's a shortcut to that incredible feeling of discovering something new that's nonetheless something very old. It's partly why Star Wars was such a success in the first place - a mix of myth and fairy tale, matinee serial and Kurosawa - a familiar story told in a new way. And like in Hadestown, "we're gonna sing it again and again."

The problem with nostalgia is when it’s empty; window dressing intended to evoke that feeling but without any substance behind it, so it feels cheap and unsatisfying. Andor doesn’t completely escape from this (blue milk, mouse droid), but most inclusions feel organic.

Sometimes I think we go to far decrying fanservice, and of course it's subjective - as I like to say, everyone hates it until they’re the fan being serviced. But there is criticism, and then there's dismissing any references to existing material as mere "fanservice" and therefore contemptible. For example, I’ve seen the treatment of Luke, Han, and Leia in the sequel trilogy defended because to actually have them interact at all would be “silly fanservice” rather than natural because, you know, they’re family.

The difference, for me, is does inclusion of a known character/object/trope/line of dialogue serve the character and/or story, or is it Leo DiCaprio pointing meme, designed for “hey it’s the thing” nostalgia and YouTube compilations with no substance behind it? Ultimately, is the inclusion Watsonian or Doylist - and if the latter, what of the former justifies it.

Mon Mothma or Saw Gerrara in Andor doesn’t feel like fanservice even though they’re existing characters, because it makes sense to include them in a story about the Rebellion’s beginning and they had a part to play in Rogue One, to which Andor is ostensibly a prequel. Conversely Leia and Vader’s inclusion in Obi-Wan Kenobi (even if I did enjoy them both) tip over in the side of fanservice because they really have no place in Obi-Wan’s story at that point and require fanwanking around their dialogue in ANH (and to be fair, Lucas was guilty of this as well). I don’t need to see random object or minor character no 6 from the PT/OT/Clone Wars, iconic catch phrase shoved where it doesn’t make sense, or obscure Legends reference divorced from context, just tell me a good story! Give me characters to care about! Make me feel something! Andor did that, where much of the other Disney Star Wars content has not.

This is my fundamental, and possibly at this point, irreconcilable, issue. Disney wanted to get away from Lucas-associated Star Wars as quickly as possible, replacing every character, planet, and theme with their own wholly Disney counterpart, killing off Han, Luke, and Leia so the old and classic couldn’t distract from the shiny and new, tearing down the conclusion of the original trilogy only to try and tell the exact same story (just not as well). They did it so quickly and so shoddily that many were understandably unsatisfied, leaving Disney to frantically course correct, going back to the well and shoving nostalgia bait into every conceivable project even (especially) if it had no place.

If they’d actually had any sort of plan for the sequel trilogy, if they’d made their focus to conclude the Skywalker Saga in a way that even approached emotional resonance, imo the vast majority of the audience would be happy to move on and embrace the next chapter - new characters, new stories. But people can’t move on from the characters they love because the treatment of those characters and the post-ROTJ timeline was so unsatisfying. Luke wouldn’t have needed to show up in The Mandolorian to try and placate the fans if treatment of the character in the ST hasn’t been so abysmal.

So LFL have been stuck in this weird ancillary storytelling space, where every project seemingly needs to be adjacent to the Skywalker Saga but not actually engaging with the Saga direct - Han has a prequel film no one asked for, Rey is a Skywalker for name recognition only, Luke pops up in pointless cameos but isn’t there when he arguably should be (just recast the damn role already!), we get young Leia in a story where she has no place rather than in one she does, who knows what’s going on with the whole Ashoka/Thrawn/Heir to the Empire stuff, Boba Fett is There with a parade of Hey it’s that character/ship/thing with no contribution to the actual storytelling.

What does this have to do with Andor? Well, Andor is perhaps the only quality tv product of the Disney era, which is fitting since Rogue One is imo the only quality film of the Disney era (TFA being retroactively diminished by what came after). Andor is the type of story Star Wars should be telling - expanding the universe, using known elements and characters where it makes sense to do so, not a collection of ideas on a whiteboard thrown in front of an LED screenstage and a bunch of meaningless easter eggs.

To be fair, this does seem what they are attempting to do with The Acolyte (which I am actually enjoying!) but the planned Rey-focused post-ST film…eh. Admittedly I never bothered to watch Rise of Skywalker, but where can the story possibly go? Is there any investment at all after the mess that was the sequel trilogy? I can’t see how the narrative can possibly be redeemed at this point, which is a shame because I do believe it started with a lot of promise in The Force Awakens that was squandered by a lack of vision, planning, and oversight, and the bizarre need to brutalise and kill off the legacy characters, marginalise the genuinely original and interesting new characters, and waste the immense acting talent they had at their disposal.

They’ve made no meaningful in-universe progress after the ST, the New Republic and Jedi have to be rebuilt again, except Rey is going to do it this time somehow, so what what the point of the last 30 years in the timeline? It’s different with Andor - we know where his story ends, but the series only makes Cassian’s sacrifice stronger, there’s emotional resonance in seeing his journey to Rogue One in knowing that it’s in service of the overall victory of the Rebellion (however undermined that victory is made by the ST).

But I digress. This rant really ended up being kind of off topic - apologies.

Anyway. Andor is good! I liked it! Looking forward to season 2!

#andor #long post #star wars

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rebelsofshield · 2 years ago

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Star Wars Andor: “The Eye”-Review

Andor delivers a tense and visually stunning episode that not only raises its own bar but sets a new standard for all live action Star Wars television.

With their plans set in motion, the rebels of Aldhani launch their begin the robbery of the planet’s Imperial garrison. Meanwhile, the heavens burst into color as The Eye fills the sky with meteors and comits, drawing the attention of the Empire and the planet’s natives. For all involved, it’s going to be an unforgettable night.

Andor is more than happy to take its time setting the stage. Even more so than its first three episode arc, the last two installments have focused on putting different parts into motion for a specific, targeted climax. There’s something inherently satisfying about seeing a well planned mission go into action and witnessing just how prepared your characters actually are. “Aldhani” and “The Axe Forgets” not only did a great job of laying clear the ins and outs of Cassian and his allies’ heist but also the personal and emotional stakes for every character involved. Some characters may be more well developed than others, but these aren’t faceless or nameless rebels charging to their deaths. They are people that we have gotten time to know. We’ve not only seen what motivates them to take up arms against the Empire, but also their personal weaknesses, fears, and eccentricities.

It’s part of what makes “The Eye” such a surprisingly nail biting experience. The only given going into this episode is that Cassian would make it out. We have no idea who, if any, of the Aldhani fighters will survive or even if their mission will succeed at all. Director Susanna White and writer Dan Gilroy have not only carefully laid out the difficulty of Vel’s plan but also just the scale of the enemy we are up against. We’ve seen TIE Fighters become horrifying again and just how little the Commandant thinks of the natives of this planet.

As has been the case for most of the series to this point, “The Eye” once again provides an effective and pointed critique of colonial abuse and indifference. The Aldhani people have stripped down to only their most faithful as the Empire tempts them away with false promises of comfort and suppresses them with shows of force. Their ceremonial gifts are treated as a joke. Their most holy event nothing more than a novelty to the Imperial leadership. Their future, one of slavery and subjugation, already determined. For all their planet exploding terror, it’s unsettling to see just how much more common and biting Imperial abuse can be and for the first time in quite a while, I really wanted to see these bastards pay.

The mission itself is tense from the start and quickly has our heroes crossing some unexpectedly murky moral lines. While Vel makes it clear that they aren’t looking to murder indiscriminately, there is something a little jarring about seeing rebels take a child hostage at gun point. It’s a reminder of the desperation of wartime and what lines can and can’t be crossed.

Of course, everything does go to hell and I honestly wasn’t prepared for just how much of a bloodbath this mission would be. Gorn gets shot down. Teremyn takes a blaster bolt to the chest. Dozens of Imperial soldiers and crew men are dropped. I’m glad that Cinta, Vel, and Cassian make it through episode’s end but I’m honestly surprised that “The Eye” is as brutal as it is. This isn’t a show that pulls its punches. The fact that we aren’t watching stock rebels and faceless stormtroopers face off makes the entire shoot out that unfolds in the garrison vault feel much more immediate and tragic. There’s an undeniably human cost to this war and Andor isn’t afraid to show its face.

The Eye, which serves as a backdrop to the escape from Aldhani, is a stunning visual set piece. It’s a gorgeously rendered fantasy environment that would have been breathtaking if we didn’t have the mission’s survivors navigating it in a rickety cargo ship while dodging TIE Fighters. Andor has been a show that has been defined by its commitment to the grit and every day of the galaxy far, far away and The Eye serves as a perfect reminder that both the spectacular and mundane can exist side by side in the same story. In fact, it makes both better.

There’s quite a bit happening in “The Eye” and it honestly would have been completely understandable if Cassian’s personal journey took an episodic backseat to the tension and fireworks. But, Gilroy’s script centers its quiet, devastating conclusion on the conflicted thief at the center of this story. As Nemik, fatally crushed by the very credits they were trying to steal, passes away, Skeen privately suggests to Cassian that the two of them split the money and run. Skeen’s sob story history from last episode? A lie. He never had a brother. Cassian’s sudden murderous response to this revelation is a jarring reminder of the complicated man that we have been following. His anger comes from betrayal and disgust at a man he thought was an ally, but there’s no righteousness in this shooting, just raw exposed hurt. Diego Luna’s acting, which to be honest has always been a series standout, is incredible here as his face conveys the whirlpool of emotions churning beneath. There’s an additional tragedy in how Cassian isn’t brought further into the fold by the marathon of carnage and betrayal, but instead finds himself running from it. Even as Vel demands that he take Nemik’s manifesto with him, Cassian clearly has no interest in returning to the rebellion any time soon. His faith in a larger cause, which had slowly been won over his time in Aldhani, has been shattered and he’s once again just an aimless, wounded loner in a complicated galaxy.

“The Eye” is a fantastically realized hour of television and accomplishes just about everything you could want out of a Star Wars story. It delivers on spectacle and a beautifully realized fantasy universe just as it doubles down on its characters and themes. It shows that Star Wars shows can be exciting and explosive while still remaining smart and human. And we are only halfway through season one.

Score: A

#Star Wars #Star Wars Andor #review #reviews #Andor

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army-of-mai-lovers · 4 years ago

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in which I get progressively angrier at the various tropes of atla fandom misogyny

tbh I think it would serve all of us to have a larger conversation about the specific ways misogyny manifests in this fandom, because I’ve seen a lot of people who characterize themselves as feminists, many of whom are women themselves, discuss the female characters of atla/lok in misogynistic ways, and people don’t talk about it enough.

disclaimer before I start: I’m not a woman, I’m an afab nonbinary person who is semi-closeted and thus often read as a woman. I’m speaking to things that I’ve seen that have made me uncomfy, but if any women (esp women existing along other axes of oppression, e.g. trans women, women of color, disabled women, etc) want to add onto this post, please do!

“This female character is a total badass but I’m not even a little bit interested in exploring her as a human being.”

I’ve seen a lot of people say of various female characters in atla/lok, “I love her! She’s such a badass!” now, this statement on its own isn’t misogynistic, but it represents a pretty pervasive form of misogyny that I’ve seen leveled in large part toward the canon female love interests of one or both of the members of a popular gay ship (*cough* zukka *cough*) I’m going to use Suki as an example of this because I see it with her most often, but it can honestly be applied to nearly every female character in atla/lok. Basically, people will say that they stan Suki, but when it comes time to engage with her as an actual character, they refuse to do it. I’ve seen meta after meta about Zuko’s redemption arc, but I so rarely see people engage with Suki on any level beyond “look at this cool fight scene!” and yeah, I love a cool Suki fight scene as much as anybody else, but I’m also interested in meta and headcanons and fics about who she is as a person, when she isn’t an accessory to Sokka’s development or doing something cool. of course, the material for this kind of engagement with Suki is scant considering she doesn’t have a canon backstory (yet) (don’t let me down Faith Erin Hicks counting on you girl) but with the way I’ve seen people in this fandom expand upon canon to flesh out male characters, I know y’all have it in you to do more with Suki, and with all the female characters, than you currently do. frankly, the most engagement I’ve seen with Suki in mainstream fandom is justifying either zukki (which again, is characterizing her in relation to male characters, one of whom she barely interacts with in canon) or one of the Suki wlw pairings. which brings me to--

“I conveniently ship this female character whose canon love interest is one of the members of my favorite non-canon ship with another female character! gay rights!”

now, I will admit, two of my favorite atla ships are yueki and mailee, and so I totally understand being interested in these characters’ dynamics, even if, as is the case with yueki, they’ve never interacted canonically. however, it becomes a problem for me when these ships are always in the background of a zukka fic. at some point, it becomes obvious that you like this ship because it gets either Zuko or Sokka’s female love interests out of the way, not because you actually think the characters would mesh well together. It’s bad form to dislike a female character because she gets in the way of your gay ship, so instead, you find another girl to pair her off with and call it a day. to be clear, I’m not saying that everybody who ships either mailee or yueki (or tysuki or maisuki or yumai or whatever other wlw rarepair involving Zuko or Sokka’s canon love interests) is nefariously trying to sideline a female character while acting publicly as if she’s is one of their faves--far from it--but it is noteworthy to me how difficult it is to find content that centers wlw ships, while it’s incredibly easy to find content that centers zukka in which mailee and/or yueki plays a background role.

also, notice how little traction wlw Katara ships gain in this fandom. when’s the last time you saw yuetara on your dash? there’s no reason for wlw Katara ships to gain traction in a fandom that is so focused on Zuko and Sokka getting together, bc she doesn’t present an immediate obstacle to that goal (at least, not an obstacle that can be overcome by pairing her up with a woman). if you are primarily interested in Zuko and Sokka’s relationship, and your queer readings of other female characters are motivated by a desire to get them out of the way for zukka, then Katara’s canon m/f relationship isn’t a threat to you, and thus, there’s no reason to read her as potentially queer. Or even, really, to think about her at all.

“Katara’s here but she’s not actually going to do anything, because deep down, I’m not interested in her as a person.”

the show has an enormous amount of textual evidence to support the claim that Sokka and Katara are integral parts of each other’s lives. so, she typically makes some kind of appearance in zukka content. sometimes, her presence in the story is as an actual character with layers and nuance, someone whom Sokka cares about and who cares about Sokka in return, but also has her own life and goals outside of her brother (or other male characters, for that matter.) sometimes, however, she’s just there because halfway through writing the author remembered that Sokka actually has a sister who’s a huge part of the show they’re writing fanfiction for, and then they proceed to show her having a meetcute with Aang or helping Sokka through an emotional problem, without expressing wants or desires outside of those characters. I’m honestly really surprised that I haven’t seen more people calling out the fact that so much of Katara’s personality in fanon revolves around her connections to men? she’s Aang’s girlfriend, she’s Sokka’s sister, she’s Zuko’s bestie. never mind that in canon she spends an enormous amount of time fighting against (anachronistic, Westernized) sexism to establish herself as a person in her own right, outside of these connections. and that in canon she has such interesting complex relationships with other female characters (e.g. Toph, Kanna, Hama, Korra if you want to write lok content) or that there are a plethora of characters with whom she could have interesting relationships with in fanon (Mai, Suki, Ty Lee, Yue, Smellerbee, and if you want to write lok content, Kya II, Lin, Asami, Senna, etc). to me, the lack of fandom material exploring Katara’s relationships with other women or with herself speak to a profound indifference to Katara as a character. I’m not saying you have to like Katara or include her in everything you write, but I am asking you to consider why you don’t find her interesting outside of her relationships with men.

“I hate Katara because she talks about her mother dying too often.”

this is something I’ve seen addressed by people far more qualified than I to address it, but I want to mention it here in part because when I asked people which fandom tropes they wanted me to talk about, this came up often, but also because I find it really disgusting that this is a thing that needs to be addressed at all. Y’all see a little girl who watched her mother be killed by the forces of an imperialist nation and say that she talks about it too much??? That is a formational, foundational event in a child’s life. Of course she’s going to talk about it. I’ve seen people say that she doesn’t talk about it that often, or that she only talks about it to connect with other victims of fn imperialism e.g. Jet and Haru, but frankly, she could speak about it every episode for no plot-significant reason whatsoever and I would still be angry to see people say she talks about it too much. And before you even bring up the Sokka comparison, people deal with grief in different ways. Sokka repressed a lot of his grief/channeled it into being the “man” of his village because he knew that they would come for Katara next if he gave them the opportunity. he probably would talk about his mother more if a) he didn’t feel massive guilt at not being able to remember what she looked like, and b) he was allowed to be a child processing the loss of his mother instead of having to become a tiny adult when Hakoda had to leave to help fight the fn. And this gets into an intersection with fandom racism, in that white fans (esp white American fans) are incapable of relating to the structural trauma that both Sokka and Katara experience and thus can’t see the ways in which structural trauma colors every single aspect of both of their characters, leading them to flatten nuance and to have some really bad takes. And you know what, speaking of bad fandom takes--

“Shitting on Mai because she gets in the way of my favorite Zuko ship is actually totally okay because she’s ~abusive~”

y’all WHAT.

ok listen, I get not liking maiko. I didn’t like it when I first got into fandom, and later I realized that while bryke cannot write romance to save their lives, fans who like maiko sure can, so I changed my tune. but if you still don’t like it, that’s fine. no skin off my back.

what IS skin off my back is taking instances in which Mai had justified anger toward Zuko, and turning it into “Mai abused Zuko.” do you not realize how ridiculous you sound? this is another thing where I get so angry about it that I don’t know how useful my analysis is actually going to be, but I’ll do my best. numerous people have noted how analysis of Mai and Zuko’s breakup in “The Beach” or Mai being justifiably angry with him at Boiling Rock or her asking for FUCKING FRUIT in “Nightmares and Daydreams” that says that all of these events were her trying to gain control over him is....ahhh...lacking in reading comprehension, but I’d like to go a step further and talk about why y’all are so intent on taking down a girl who doesn’t show emotion in normative ways. obviously, there’s a “Zuko can do no wrong” aspect to Mai criticism (which is super weird considering how his whole arc is about how he can do lots of wrong and he has to atone for the wrong that he’s done--but that’s a separate post.) But I also see slandering Mai for not expressing her emotions normatively and not putting up with Zuko’s shit and slandering Katara for “talking about her mother too often” as two sides of the same coin. In both cases, a female character expresses emotions that make you, the viewer, uncomfortable, and so instead of attempting to understand where those emotions may have come from and why they might be manifesting the way they are, y’all just throw the whole character away. this is another instance of people in the fandom being fundamentally disinterested in engaging with the female characters of atla in a real way, except instead of shallowly “stanning” Mai, y’all hate her. so we get to this point where female characters are flattened into one of two things: perfect queens who can do no wrong, or bitches. and that’s not who they are. that’s not who anyone is. but while we as a fandom are pretty good at understanding b1 Zuko’s actions as layered and multifaceted even though he’s essentially an asshole then, few are willing to lend the same grace to any female character, least of all Mai.

and what’s funny is sometimes this trope will intersect with “I conveniently ship this female character whose canon love interest is one of the members of my favorite non-canon ship with another female character! gay rights!”, so you’ll have someone actively calling Mai toxic/problematic/abusive, and at the same time ship her with Ty Lee? make it make sense! but then again, maybe that’s happening because y’all are fundamentally disinterested in Ty Lee as a character too.

“I love Ty Lee so much that I’m going to treat her like an infantilized hypersexual airhead!”

there are so many things happening in y’alls characterization of Ty Lee that I struggled to synthesize it into one quippy section header. on one hand, you have the hypersexualization, and on the other hand, you have the infantilization, which just makes the hypersexualization that much worse.

(of course, sexualizing or hypersexualizing ANY atla character is really not the move, considering that these are child characters in a children’s show, but then again, that’s a separate post.)

now, I understand how, from a very, very surface reading of the text, you could come to the conclusion that Ty Lee is an uncomplicated bimbo. if you grew up on Western media the way I did, you’ll know that Ty Lee has a lot of the character traits we associate with bimbos: the form-fitting pink crop top, the general conventional attractiveness, the ditzy dialogue. but if you think about it for more than three seconds, you’ll understand that Ty Lee has spent her whole life walking a tightrope, trying to please Azula and the rest of the royal family while also staying true to herself. Ty Lee and Azula’s relationship is a really complex and interesting topic that I don’t really have time to explore at the moment given how long this post is, but I’d argue that Ty Lee’s constant, vocal adulation is at least partially a product of learning to survive at court at an early age. Like Mai, she has been forced to regulate her emotions as a member of fn nobility, but unlike Mai, she also has six sisters who look exactly like her, so she has a motivation to be more peppy and more affectionate to stand out.

fandom does not do the work to understand Ty Lee. as is a theme with this post, fandom is actively disinterested in investigating female characters beyond a very surface level reading of them. Thus, fandom takes Ty Lee’s surface level qualities--her love of the color pink, her revealing standard outfit, and the fact that once she found a boy attractive and also once a lot of boys found her attractive--and they stretch this into “Ty Lee is basically Karen Smith from Mean Girls.” thus, Ty Lee is painted as a bimbo, or more specifically, as not smart, uncritically adoring of Azula (did y’all forget all the non-zukka bits of Boiling Rock?), and attractive to the point of hypersexualization. I saw somebody make a post that was like “I wish mailee was more popular but I’m also glad it isn’t because otherwise people would write it as Mai having to put up with her dumb gf” and honestly I have to agree!! this is one instance in which I’m glad that fandom doesn’t discuss one of my favorite characters that often because I hate the fanon interpretation of Ty Lee, I think it’s rooted in misogyny (particularly misogyny against East Asian women, which often takes the form of fetishizing them and viewing them only through a Western white male gaze)

(side note: here at army-of-mai-lovers, we stan bimbos. bimbos are fucking awesome. I personally don’t read Ty Lee as a bimbo, but if that’s you, that’s fucking awesome. keep doing what you’re doing, queen <3 or king or monarch, it’s 2021, anyone can be a bimbo, bitches <3)

“Toph can and will destroy everyone here with her bare hands because she’s a meathead who likes to murder people and that’s it!”

Toph is, and always has been, one of my favorite ATLA characters. My very first fic in fandom was about her, and she appears prominently in a lot of my other work as well. One thing that I am always struck by with Toph is how big a heart she has. She’s independent, yes, snarky, yes, but she cares about people--even the family that forced her to make herself smaller because they didn’t believe that their blind daughter could be powerful and strong. Her storyline is powerful and emotionally resonant, her bending is cool precisely because it’s based in a “wait and listen” approach instead of just smashing things indiscriminately, she’s great disabled rep, and overall one of the best characters in the show.

And in fandom, she gets flattened into “snarky murder child.”

So where does this come from? Well, as we all know, Toph was originally conceived of as a male character, and retained a lot of androgyny (or as the kids call it, Gender) when she was rewritten as a female character. There are a lot of cultural ideas about androgynous/butch women being violent, and people in fandom seem to connect that larger cultural narrative with some of Toph’s more violent moments in the show to create the meathead murder child trope, erasing her canon emotionality, softness, heart, and femininity in the process.

This is not to say that you shouldn’t write or characterize Toph as being violent or snarky at all ever, because yeah, Toph definitely did do Earth Rumbles a lot before joining the gaang, and yeah, Toph is definitely a sarcastic person who makes fun of her friends a lot. What I am saying is that people take these traits, sans the emotional logic, marry them to their conception of androgynous/butch women as violent/unemotional/uncaring, and thus create a caricature of Toph that is not at all up to snuff. When I see Toph as a side character in a fic (because yeah, Toph never gets to be a main character, because why would a fandom obsessed with one male character in particular ever make Toph a protagonist in her own right?) she’s making fun of people, killing people, pranking people, etc, etc. She’s never talking to people about her emotions, or palling around with her found family, or showing that she cares about her friends. Everything about her relationship with her parents, her disability, her relationship to Gender, and her love of her friends is shoved aside to focus on a version of Toph that is mean and uncaring because people have gotten it into their heads that androgynous/butch women are mean and uncaring.

again, we see a female character who does not emote normatively or in a way that makes you, the viewer, comfortable, and so you warp her character until she’s completely unrecognizable and flat. and for what?

Azula

no, I didn’t come up with a snappy name for this section, mainly because fanon interpretations of Azula and my own feelings toward the character are...complicated. I know there were some people who wanted me to write about Azula and the intersection of misogyny and ableism in fanon interpretations of her character, but I don’t think I can deliver on that because I personally am in a period of transition with how I see Azula. that is to say, while I still like her and believe that she can be redeemed, there is a lot of merit to disliking her. the whole point of this post is that the female characters of ATLA are complex people whom the fandom flattens into stereotypes that don’t hold up to scrutiny, or dislike for reasons that don’t make sense. Azula, however, is a different case. the rise of Azula defenders and Azula stans has led to this sentiment that Azula is a 14 y/o abuse victim who shouldn’t be held accountable for her actions. it seems to me that people are reacting to a long, horrible legacy of male ATLA fans armchair diagnosing Azula with various personality disorders (and suggesting that people with those personality disorders are inherently monstrous and unlovable which ahhhh....yikes) and then saying that those personality disorders make her unlovable, which is quite obviously bad. and hey, I get loving a character that everyone else hates and maybe getting so swept up in that love that you forget that your fave is complicated and has made some unsavory choices. it sucks that fanon takes these well-written, complex villains/antiheroes and turns them into monsters with no critical thought whatsoever. but the attitude among Azula stans that her redemption shouldn’t be hard, that her being a child excuses all of the bad things that she’s done, that she is owed redemption....all of that rubs me the wrong way. I might make another post about this in the future that discusses this in more depth, but as it stands now: while I understand that there is a legacy of misogynistic, ableist, unnuanced takes on Azula, the backlash to that does not take into account the people she hurt or the fact that in ATLA she does not make the choice to pursue redemption. and yes, Zuko had help in making that choice that Azula didn’t, and yes, Azula is a victim of abuse, but in a show about children who have gone through untold horrors and still work to better the lives of the people around them, that is not enough for me to uncritically stan her.

Conclusion

misogyny in this fandom runs rampant. while there are some tropes of fandom misogyny that are well-documented and have been debunked numerous times, there are other, subtler forms of misogyny that as far as I know have gone completely unchecked.

what I find so interesting about misogyny in atla fandom is that it’s clear that it’s perpetrated by people who are aware of fandom misogyny who are actively trying not to be misogynistic. when I first joined atla fandom last summer, memes about how zukka fandom was better than every other fandom because they didn’t hate the female characters who got in the way of their gay ship were extremely prevalent, and there was this sense that *this* fandom was going to model respectful, fun, feminist online fandom. not all of the topes I’ve outlined are exclusive to or even largely utilized in zukka fandom, but a lot of them are. I’ve been in and out of fandom since I was eleven years old, and most of the fandom spaces I’ve been in have been majority-female, and all of them have been incredibly misogynistic. and I always want to know why. why, in these communities created in large part by women, in large part for women, does misogyny run wild? what I realize now is that there’s never going to be a one-size fits all answer to that question. what’s true for 1D fandom on Wattpad in 2012 is absolutely not true for atla fandom on tumblr in 2021. the answers that I’ve cobbled together for previous fandoms don’t work here.

so, why is atla fandom like this? why did the dream of a feminist fandom almost entirely focused on the romantic relationship between two male characters fall apart? honestly, I think the notion that zukka fandom ever was this way was horrifically ignorant to begin with. from my very first moment in the fandom, I was seeing racism, widespread sexualization of minors, and yes, misogyny. these aspects of the fandom weren’t talked about as much as the crocverse or other, much more fun aspects. further, atla (specifically zukka) fandom misogyny often doesn’t look like the fandom misogyny we’ve become familiar with from like, Sherlock fandom or what have you. for the most part, people don’t actively hate Suki, they just “stan” without actually caring about her. they hate Mai because they believe in treating male victims of abuse equally. they’re not characterizing Toph poorly, they’re writing her as a “strong woman.” in short, people are misogynistic, and then invoke a shallow, incomplete interpretation of feminist theory to shield themselves from accusations of misogyny. it’s not unlike the way some people will invoke a shallow, incomplete interpretation of critical race theory to shield themselves from accusations of racism, or how they’ll talk about “freedom of speech” and “the suppression of women’s sexuality” to justify sexualizing minors. the performance of feminism and antiracism is what’s important, not the actual practice.

if you’ve made it this far, first off, hi, thanks so much for reading, I know this was a lot. second, I would seriously encourage you to be aware of these fandom tropes and to call them out when you see them. elevate the voices of fans who do the work of bringing the female characters of atla to life. invest in the wlw ships in this fandom. drop a kudos and a comment on a rangshi fic (please, drop a kudos and a comment on a rangshi fic). read some yuetara. let’s all be honest about where we are now, and try to do better in the future. I believe in us.

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destielshippingnews · 3 years ago

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Edvard's Supernatural Rewatch & Review: 1x12 Faith

In this review and analysis, I will discuss Dean’s obvious trauma, survivor’s guilt, and suicidal ideations stemming from John's mistreatment of him; Sam’s possible autism; and atheism in America in Supernatural's twelfth episode. Spoilers up to the final episode of The Show.

1x12 Faith is one of the fans’ all-time favourite episodes, enjoying a rating on 8,8 on IMDb based on over 6,000 votes. Written by Sera Gamble and Raelle Tucker, this episode suggests that Gamble IS a good writer of individual episodes, though she dropped the ball as show-runner on series 6 and 7. However, Raelle Tucker’s solo episodes such as 2x20 What Is and What Should Never Be are standout performances, so I am not sure where the real credit belongs.

1x12 Faith presents a morally-ambiguous situation wherein an innocent person dies regardless of what happens. It is reminiscent of the Buffy episode 2x07 Lie to Me, wherein a character dying of brain cancer is willing to sacrifice dozens of innocents to avoid his fate. Faith is, however, unusual in Supernatural in that it shows an uncharacteristic depth of thought regarding its plot.

In addition to a stellar script and Jensen’s usual world-class performance (once more, I swear I am not paid to say things like that), Julie Benz also graced the screen with her presence in the role of Layla. Unless I am forgetting somebody, she is the third Buffyverse cast member to appear on the show, following Amy Acker in 1x03 Dead in the Water and, of course, Jeffrey Dean Morgan who appeared in an episode of Angel. While lovely to see familiar faces from similar genre shows appearing in Supernatural, it is a reminder of how precarious the show’s position was at first. They tried to draw in the audience they expected would enjoy the show by casting people from other shows the intended audience knew and enjoyed. It does not count as stunt acting coughSnookie cough Paris Hilton cough and their performances definitely stand up without distracting from the plot.

The plot is certainly one of the most interesting and challenging so far; no matter what happens, innocents are going to suffer and die. Do we want innocent Dean to live, or do we want innocent Layla to live? The plot will not allow both.

But the first year of this show is mainly focused on developing the brothers and their relationship to each other, so episodes such as 1x12 Faith stand out for having both brilliant plot and character development.

On to the episode, and the cold open begins right in the middle of the action. In medias res (a term meaning ‛starting in the middle of the action’) is a risky business. Writers want to get the viewer or reader interested in the story right away, and a fight scene or chase is theoretically a good way of going about this. It is risky because if the reader or viewer does not know the characters, the stakes, or even what is going on, it can be confusing and off-putting. Star Wars IV: A New Hope did this well in the opening shot AND the opening scene: the visuals of the tiny rebel starship and the overwhelming juggernaut of the Imperial battleship chasing it tells us everything we need to know to get started. The introduction of Darth Vader presents him immediately as a tyrannical threat. All of this is done with no backstory (except the opening crawl) and it is easy to follow the events.

The cold open of 1x12 Faith is in medias res done right: I know the characters and the world well enough that no explanation is necessary here. A shame, then, that The Show did not do this more often. I expect that by the time it had become two or three series long, they could not rely on all the viewership having watched all the episodes, knowing all the lore, or simply having the attention span to be able to follow without having their hand held. Perhaps this explains why the ‛Previously on’ eventually gets obnoxiously spoilery with all its unnecessary exposition for the idiots in the cheap seats.

What exactly a rawhead is never gets revealed, only that it eats children. A rawhead is referred to again in series 14, but only in passing. As such, I will skip over it to the important part of the cold open: Dean killing it with electric. The rawhead knocked Dean over into a puddle of water, and Dean wasted no time in electrocuting the rawhead with the stun gun. Unfortunately the rawhead was just barely standing in the water, so Dean got shocked as well. Upon my rewatch of the episode for this review, I realised Dean probably knew this was a risk. It could not have escaped his notice that he was wet and lying in a puddle, nor that playing with electricity had a high chance of damaging him. Did he accept the probability of his own death as an acceptable price in killing the rawhead and saving the children? Knowing Dean as well as I do, I have to conclude that he did, even without taking the rest of this episode into account.

Sticking with the cold open a while longer, let’s discuss Sam a bit here. It should not be news to anybody who has read this far that I am not here for Sam: I do not love Sam, I do not live for Sam, I generally do not care for Sam. I do understand, though, that some people get a lot out of Dean and Sam’s brotherhood, and enjoy a show about love that is not romantic. While I have my beef with some people in this contingent, the premise of a show focusing on men’s non-romantic bonds with other men definitely appeals to me for a variety of reasons. I first read Robert and Arvid in Vilhelm Moberg’s The Emigrants novels as a deeply intimate and important male friendship which they valued above other relationships, and I did not realise how much I needed that in my life until I read it. (That said, it is also equally valid to interpret Arvid and Robert as a same-sex couple, but that is another story).

Supernatural, however, made Dean and Sam’s relationship poisonous, manipulative, and abusive. Dean was the codependent abused and Sam the narcissistic abuser. While it gave us this dysfunctional horror show, the series seemed blissfully unaware of precisely what it was portraying. It expected the viewer to get behind the brothers’ relationship and root for them to value their brotherhood over everything and everybody else. This is not what I watch the show for, but Sam’s reaction to Dean’s apparent death in the cold open did give me a glimpse of what The Show and the brothers’ relationship could have been. Sam genuinely seemed terrified that Dean was dead, and the rest of the episode carries this on. I give Sam a lot of grief, but even I have to admit that in spite of all his crap, he does love Dean. This does not negate the bad behaviour, but at least when Dean needs him, Sam does his best to help. It is just a shame that Sam only shows his love when he is about to lose Dean.

It is also nice to be reminded of a time when Jared cared about acting on this show.

Moving swiftly on, after a nasty reminder of precisely how messed up the American medical insurance situation is, the viewer is presented with a scene which – without my trademark oversharing – is simply an entire mood. Panda-eyed, pale, and weak, Dean’s suicidal, fatalistic attitude is both tragic and 100% relatable.

I have stated elsewhere that when I watch Dean, I see exactly the kind of young man who is at an acute risk of dying by suicide. The responsibility he takes onto himself, his self-sacrifice, his lack of self-worth and self-esteem, his abusive, violent childhood (leaving your child alone in a motel for weeks IS abuse, whatever John’s apologists might say), his lack of support before he is in a crisis, his use of humour to cover up his real emotions, his desperation to be worthy of his dad’s love... I am no expert on suicide or suicide studies, but I cannot help recognising it in Dean (and The Show explicitly portrays him as suicidal on various occasions). Whether or not this was the intent is besides the point, and whether or not I am projecting is also beside the point; this is what I see.

One thing many people do not know or consider when thinking of suicide is that it is not always actively trying to die, but it can also mean not trying to stay alive. Dean makes it abundantly clear that he does not intend to keep living in this scene as soon as he brushes aside Sam’s comment of “I talked to your doctor”. He purposefully deflected with his remark about daytime telly being terrible (hilarious given Jensen’s career), signalling his desire to avoid that conversation.

Dean gets a lot of hate from some people who perceive his actions as entirely selfish: he brought Sam back into the hunting life in episode 1 because Dean did not want to be alone, some claim. Some also claim he did what he did at the end of series 2 because he could not live without Sam, even if it meant Sam had to watch him die. He restored Sam’s soul against Sam’s will in series 6. He helped ‛Ezekiel’ keep Sam alive in series 9, etc etc etc.

At risk of offending one or two of my seven readers, that reads to me like the limited perspective of the younger, immature sibling who does not see his/her older brother as an actual human, but rather a trope and a punchbag. That reads like Emo King Sam’s perspective, and it is so short-sighted and self-absorbed that it does not belong anywhere but in a teenager’s diary.

Dean believes he is worthless, but at the same time is entirely responsible and accountable for other people’s suffering. He does not try to help or save others because he wants to be the hero or wants to have control over their lives, but because he believes the only thing he is good for is getting hurt so other people do not have to. If that means sacrificing his life, then so be it: his life is worthless anyway, and even his dad never shows him anything resembling love.

Up until this point in the show, Dean’s mask has mostly stayed firmly on around Sam. He presents himself as a larger-than-life, unnaturally strong and charismatic hunter with a Devil may care attitude, but he does this because it is what others need of him. He has to make Sam believe Dean is stronger than he is and that Dean can protect him, because that was always his role. He must be seen to be capable (which of course he is), but to do this he must downplay and conceal any weakness to maintain the illusion. The reason for this is that any hint of weakness runs the risk of the people he loves seeing him as flawed, casting him aside, and replacing him.

I said in 1x09 Home that I will save most of my ire for John until a later date, and the later date is fast approaching. We see little direct evidence of John’s mistreatment of his sons, the elder in particular. However, the other side of Dean presented in 1x12 Faith is all the negative image we should need. His façade falls away to reveal a weak, small, broken, and very human man. His eyes are sunken, his skin is grey, his jokes fall flat, he sits like a sick man with breathing problems, and the viewer is forced to look at the man behind the mask. The choice of attire for Dean in this episode is also striking is its divergence from his usual garb: a hoodie and outer coat reminiscent of Tom Hanniger in My Bloody Valentine. This makes him look smaller, younger, and much more vulnerable.

This is the part of Dean he hates other to see. If they see him as weak, they see him as less capable, and less valuable. They see him as disposable. As his entire motivation is centred around being valuable to others, this is incredibly difficult and scary for him. Worse, perhaps, is the fact it was not a monster who did this to him, not really: it was an accident involving electricity. It was a reminder that simply being alive is a risk, and being alive is a threat to Dean’s usefulness.

His resistance to Sam’s offers of help also suggest a certain view of himself: that he truly is worthless and does not deserve to live if he is weak. Thanks, John.

All of these last few paragraphs seem to pass a huge number of viewers by, and I cannot for the life of me understand how. The show presents Dean as suffering suicidal ideations in a way which is blindingly obvious, but still people miss it. Some even say he wants to die fighting. It is true Dean says more than once in the fifteen years of the show something to the effect of ‛I want to die fighting’ and ‛The only way it ends for me is young and bloody’. Some people cite this as reasons why what happened in 15x20 is what Dean would have wanted, but I cannot even begin to agree.

He does not want to die like that, he simply does not see a happy ending for himself. He does not believe he could ever have anything resembling a happy ending, and all his actions are informed by this belief. He never hesitated for a second before electrocuting the rawhead in the cold open, for example, because he thought he would likely die soon anyway. This is why he willingly sacrifices himself over and over again, and this is precisely why the way he died in the ‛official’, ‛canonical’ ending to the show was a complete betrayal of the character, the actor, and the fans who saw a part of themselves in Dean. Misha and Jensen’s You Are Not Alone campaign raised money to start a suicide and crisis hotline, and spoiler alert spoiler alert having Dean die of a treatable wound because he accepted he was supposed to die young was a slap in the face and a wad of spit in the eye spoiler alert spoiler alert.

The show was so close to doing so many things right, but the last two episodes undid every chance they possibly had. Cas’s erasure shocked me, and the refusal to address Dean’s feelings about Cas’s confession was a kick in the nuts, but what happened to Dean took the biscuit.

This was not just another of my side-tracks, but necessary to ensure you are on the same page as me when I discuss this episode and its importance in Dean’s character development.

Dean has hitherto been a larger-than-life character, so it is shocking for him to be hospitalised and on the verge of a very human death. It is intensely unheroic and he fully believed Sam would leave him there to die.

If I had a heart left...

Moving on to the main plot of the episode, Sam’s refusal to let Dean die lead them to a faith healer in Nebraska, and the episode’s other main theme comes into play: belief in ‘good’ and faith in general.

It was not until my most recent viewing that I actually saw anything unusual about Dean’s lack of religious belief. Whether you want to call it agnosticism, atheism, deism, or whatever, he does not believe in ‘good’ forces, nor miracles, not apparently a life after death. As a British person living in northern Europe, this is par for the course. Most people in Britain are de facto atheists, and most people in the Nordic countries where I now live are atheist. Dean’s views would not in any way stand out

here or be considered noteworthy, and Sam’s would be regarded as naïve, sweet, and childish.

America (and Canada), however, is a different beast altogether. Belief in the Christian god is taken as a matter of course there, and atheists or even agnostics are seen as radical, dangerous, and even threatening. Dean’s lack of faith is therefore remarkable. Of course, given his history it would be hard for him to believe in the existence of good of any kind, and it took until 15x18 for anybody to tell him that he was good.

Which reminds me, as sweet as Layla was, her line If you’re going to have faith, you have to have faith when the miracles don’t happen’ was just a nice way of saying ‘If you don’t believe when things are going badly, you never really believed in the first place’. I understand religionists hold onto things like that as if it is is a noble position to hold, but to be quite honest it just sounds like denial to me. However, my own opinions on religious belief are not the issue here: the point is that Dean is in a nadir where his lack of belief is challenged by the apparent existence of miracles.

Before going into the tent, I would like to linger a moment on Dean and Sam’s conversation outside. Dean’s hesitance to enter the tent is clearly a product of his refusal to believe anything good can exist, and Sam’s question ‘If you know evil’s out there, why don’t you believe good’s out there too?’ is one a lot of viewers might be asking themselves.

My thoughts went instantly to Anne Rice’s novel Interview with the Vampire. In contrast to the film, the first 100 pages of the novel deal with Louis’s brother Paul’s illness and death. His illness was likely some variety of psychosis as he claimed to be hearing god. A local priest was convinced it was not the voice of god the boy was hearing, but rather Satan. A similar question is raised in this plot arc: why is it so much easier for us to believe in evil than to believe in good? Why did the priest not believe it was God talking to the brother?

The answer Louis gives to the interviewer is essentially the same as Dean’s justification: we see evil much more often than we see good, so it is no stretch of the imagination to come to conclusion that evil exists. It requires much more ‘imagination’ to conclude that good exists, too. In fact, the predominance of evil in everyday life makes it hard to see how good could exist.

The fact that Doubting Dean is chosen as the first person to be healed at his first time attending the faith healer’s service is indeed open to interpretation as divine intervention. As episode 4x18 The Monster at the End of This Book makes clear, God is indeed very much involved in the brothers’ lives (especially Dean’s, with whom he has a weird, perverted obsession), this is an interesting thought to entertain.

Putting that aside, it does not take long before Dean and Sam realise the miraculous healings are not blessings or any variety, but the result of serious dark magic which has bound a reaper to the healer’s wife. The wife in question – named Sue-Ann – sends the reaper to kill a person whom she deems morally reprehensible, and that person’s life force (or so I deduce, it is never made explicit) is transferred to the person the healer is ‘healing’.

The first person to die in this manner in this episode is a gay teacher, and it is this man who died so that Dean could live. I would like to draw the reader’s attention to three things here: it is specifically Dean’s heart which is failing, rather than any other organ, and that the person who died to ‘save’ him is both gay and a teacher. The teacher role is a good mirror of Dean. Teaching is a nurturing profession which requires a lot of dedication, care, and patience, as the teacher is imparting knowledge to others to help them succeed in various areas of life.

The teacher killed in this episode was a school teacher, raising children. This should be more than enough for the viewer to draw parallels between Dean and the teacher, since Dean was responsible for raising his own brother at the expense of his own childhood. The teacher died of heart failure, and Dean’s heart was healed with a gay man’s life force (read: Dean’s heart is a gay man’s heart). This is what the episode shows us, and is not an issue up for debate: while dying of heart failure, Dean was linked to a gay man who died of heart failure. From 1x12 Faith until the end of the show, Dean has a gay man’s heart. Make of that what you will.

The blind priest’s line about seeing Dean’s heart, and that he was a young man with an important purpose, should also cause people ears to prick up.

Ethically and morally, what Sue-Ann is doing is unquestionably bad. A young woman dying of inoperable brain cancer is tragic, but should somebody die to save her? Layla never knew the cost of the healer’s miracles, so was not wracked with survivor’s guilt, but Dean’s confusion as to why he was chosen and saved indeed does transform into full-blown survivor’s guilt. Having experienced survivor’s guilt, Dean’s journey in this episode is spot on – it is more than simply wondering ‘Why am I alive?’, and involves a feeling that I do not deserve to be alive, and that I should die. He wants to stop the ‘healing’ to prevent more people dying, but perhaps also hopes that in doing so he can end his own life and be free of both his burden and his guilt.

What makes things worse is that Layla is exactly the kind of person whom Dean would want to protect and save, and Dean clearly sees a lot of himself reflected in her mother’s dedication to helping her. That she was passed over in favour of him is a knife in the guts, but the true kicker comes in at the end of the episode when Dean finds out that Layla is to be healed, and Dean will be killed to save her.

This was peak dramaturgy and I must tip my hat to the writers for this. Dean certainly turned his charm up to 11 the moment he set eyes on her, but after that I sensed nothing sexual between them; rather he simply wanted to help and protect her from her death, but was unable to. He and Sam had to sacrifice her to save others, and that is true tragedy.

Her bravery at the end of the episode when she has her final scene with Dean shows a lot of personal strength. I am not religious so I cannot take any kind of comfort in believing a deity or divine something has a plan or will take care of me after I die, but I understand it is a source of comfort and strength for a lot of people. Layla has accepted her death, but she does not do so in a despairing manner, but rather with her back straight and head high. The point of this final scene was not simply to drive home to the viewer the fact that Layla WILL die within the next few months, but to compare and contrast her with Dean. Both were at death’s door in this episode, but ‘faithless’ Doubting Dean fell in to despair, whereas Layla refused to bend beneath her burden.

A nasty thought I had whilst writing this section was that the writers might have written Dean the way they did in this episode as a snide, underhanded comment on the cowardice and faithlessness of suicidal people. It was just a thought, and I cannot give it much credence given Raelle Tucker’s exploration of Dean in 2x20 What Is and What Should Never Be, yet Layla’s comment about having faith when miracles do not happen can easily be interpreted that way.

If the readers want my own thoughts on this – and if you have read all of my reviews up to this point, you probably do – I sympathise but cannot empathise with Layla’s position. Sure if you believe, you cannot just believe when things are going well, but my question is ‘Why would I believe in the first place?’ I lost a friend to suicide, and never once turned to any kind of deity for help or comfort. It would be nice to believe in some kind of afterlife and to hope for a reunion of some variety, but I had to look death right in the eye and accept it as the final end. Doing otherwise would feel like lying to myself to avoid an uncomfortable truth and ignoring the reality of his death.

As for the reaper in this episode, it would be fine if reapers never appeared again, but they do as early as 2x01 In My Time of Dying. The next reaper we see looks nothing like this reaper, nor reapers much later in the show. The reason for this is likely that the writers etc had not decided on exactly what reapers were in the Superverse, how they worked, or what they looked like. This is not a big problem, but slightly jarring: the reaper in 1x12 Faith looks like what we might think of as an agent of death: ill, old, ugly, creepy, but this is almost completely forgotten after this. The fact that clocks stop when a reaper is around is a nice touch, but never comes up ever again.

What is not forgotten is Dean’s relationship with death, and it makes a reprise at the very beginning of series 2. Dean is a Jesus figure, as Paula R. Stiles detailed in her own reviews of Supernatural. He takes responsibility for other people’s suffering, and takes their guilt unto himself to try to absolve them. He is also the character who challenges death the most, and who eventually becomes the arch-enemy of Death itself.

This episode begins this parallel, but also begins what some fans call a storyline which details Dean’s slow journey to faith. The theme istaken up again in 2x13 Houses of the Holyand coming to a conclusion in 4x01 Lazarus Rising when Cas appears and reveals the existence of angels, i.e. the ‘good’ which Dean did not believe exist. This is a plot I am not keen on: 2x13 ended with Dean believing in something because of a freak accident, and 4x01 is not about belief, but knowledge. Belief and knowledge are different, and if ones knows angels exist, one does not believe in them. One knows. This is a strange, incoherent end to this subplot, but I can see what they were perhaps trying to do with it. Maybe religious people will get something out of this, but not me.

At just over 4,500 words, I will move on from the big topics of the episode and cover some smaller points. I make no secret of my distaste for Sam, but it recently occurred to me that some of his bad behaviour could possible be explained by his being somewhere on the autistic spectrum. He has a few traits of Asperger’s, such as fixations (serial killers, magic lore) and saying awful, insensitive things which he might not actually realise are awful and insensitive, which suggest perhaps something is not quite usual about his brain.

However, some of the things he says to Dean seem too malicious to be explainable as ‘not realising what he was saying’. When Dean checks himself out of hospital and turns up at the motel looking like Death warmed up, Sam wastes no time in talking to him in an incredibly patronising manner. ‘This whole laughing-in-the-face-of-death thing, it’s crap. I can see right through it.’ While it is nice for Sam that he thinks he is an expert of psychoanalysis, it should be obvious to anybody that Dean’s attempts at humour is a coping mechanism, as gallows humour always is. It is not particularly clever to see through it, but it would have been wise to allow him that little fig leaf so he can deal with his death in the way he wants to, not in a way that comforts Sam.

Come to think of it, this is exactly the problem I have with series 3: rather than focusing on Dean’s own journey in coming to terms with his own impending death, the focus is on Sam and how he deal with it.

But back to 1x12 Faith: Sam is almost certainly not neurotypical, but he does a better job of hiding it than Dean. Dean functions well in certain situations, but 1x11 Scarecrow gave us a hint that he is not as socially fluent as he might appear to be. Sam, however, is better as interaction with people he does not know, indicating perhaps a greater capability of adapting himself to different situations. This would not have come about naturally in his childhood, as he was isolated, had few if any lasting friendships, and mostly interacted with Dean who is in no way a paragon of social interaction. He had nobody to learn this stuff from, so would have had to learn by observation and mimicry.

This does not in any excuse his bad behaviour, but could explain it. I do not think he would be anythingmore than a mild or borderline case of Asperger’s if he is autistic, and the traits I have seen do not add up much, but it is a possibility. These traits can also be explained by his having grown up in an abnormal environment, but the two are not mutually exclusive.

The policemen seemed unnecessarily rough in their treatment of Dean when Sue-Ann started shouting. They could see he was not doing anything, so I do not understand why they grabbed him bodily. I did get a laugh however, later in the episode when Dean taunted them by saying ‘You gonna put that fear of God in me?’ It does not take much to see the euphemism there. Typical Dean, sexualising himself in front of authority figures.

The DVD featured an alternate version of Dean’s healing scene which is intercut with the gay teacher being killed. I can understand why the clip might have beencut: it made it too obvious too early that the healing had serious consequences, and it also felt a little awkward. A nagging in the back of my mind wonders whether the unmissable link between Dean and the gay teacher might also have played a role in the scene being axed from the theatrical release.

Regarding the choice of song for the episode, whilst it is the song one would expect in an episode dealing with this topic, it is obvious. I am not a huge fan of it, and sometimes the soundtrack in series one and two can feel like 10 year old Eric Kripke’s mix-tapeof his favourite songs. That said, it worked well and added to the vibe. I always associate the song with Stephen King’s The Stand because the chorus appears as a quote at the beginning.

And one last thing: John did not respond to Sam’s telephone calls. His elder son was dying, and John could not drop whatever it was doing for long enough to even call back. I spent a while at the beginning of this review detailing the negative image of John’s treatment of his sons, particularly the elder one. The fact John could not even pick up the telephone, let alone ‘shag ass’ to see Dean one last time before he died, really should cement the idea that John does not love or value Dean. His apologists might claim that John was busy, in too much danger, or trying to keep danger away from his sons, but Dean was dying. What more danger could he have been in? Neither does he apologise at any point for this rejection or abandonment. This is unforgivable, and I do not care what John does ‘for Dean’ in 2x01: he left his son to die and could not even pick up the telephone to call him. No apologia can excuse that.

With that, it is time to draw this analysis to a close. This is definitely one of the finest episodes of series one, and indeed the entire show. The acting was stellar, the dramaturgy was excellent, and <3 I live for Dean in a hoodie <3. After having watched the whole show, I appreciated the fact that an episode about Dean’s mortality actually focused on Dean and his struggles. This is a stark contrast to series 3 of the show, wherein Dean is dying but the focus is on Sam and his coming to terms with the imminent death of his brother. That is an important aspect of the story, but since Dean’s own journey was side-lined, it felt inappropriate and self-absorbed.

Next time is one of the worst episodes of the whole show, so prepare for whiplash as I write about 500 words about 1x13 Route 666 and its racist monster truck, then go straight to 1x14 Nightmare.

And in case you missed it, <3 I live for Dean in a hoodie <3 Thank you to @emotionalsupportbees for discussing this episode with me. Your insights on this episode revealing Dean's human weakness were definitely valued.

#dean winchester #spn #supernatural #jensen ackles #1x12 faith #spn 1x12 #spn rewatch #spn meta #edvard's supernatural rewatch

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