#i pay whatever it takes to make this happen !!
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Hey I'm hearing uh. More, and more, and more buzz about GLP-1 agonists like ozempic from random ppl and healthcare providers alike and there's like a terrifying lack of lucidity abt it so I just wanna say, if you've heard some stuff and are curious:
Ozempic is a chemically-aided crash diet. That's it.
Like metformin, an older diabetes medication used off-label for weight loss, it's functioning as an appetite suppressant in this use-case. It's not magic; it's not changing how your body makes or uses fat; it just makes it less miserable to eat less. It is contraindicated by histories of disordered eating and should absolutely not be prescribed without a full screening for above-adequate food intake and nutrition *and* ongoing screening for adequate nourishment/malnutrition: this is broadly not happening.
I've also seen no indication that ozempic/GLP-1 agonists are any less likely to lead to weight cycling (w/o constant use) than a straight crash diet, or do anything meaningful to limit the known, significant health risks of weight cycling.
Nothing has changed:
The main things we know from a western scientific perspective about weight and weight loss are that 1) almost all people who lose significant weight gain it back and 2) weight cycling causes cardiovascular and metabolic health complications. Yall we aint even have strong evidence to suggest that weight loss is beneficial to health conditions associated with higher weights. This *should* point to Dr's never ever reccomending weight loss (we do know it can hurt, don't know it can help) but yknow we live in uhhhh fucking world.
We are possibly ripe for an aggressive intensification of anti-fat medical rhetoric, especially in pediatrics
Among the projections for an RFK FDA that ive gotten from folks i know in these fields is a renewed focus on childhood obseity and general military-style fitness. As the ozempic fad has already been ramping up, I'm kinda! concerned! about this being a major point of focus for the oncoming administration--i figure we're ripe for another mass diet craze associated with a wide variety of deaths anyway and that existing cultural+market inertia added to it being literally on the agenda spells some not great things. I really seriously reccomend paying extra attention to this area.
Clinics love ozempic because it's extremely popular and extremely profitable--i even know someone who's job was threatened for refusing to prescribe it. We already know that we cant trust doctors to be informed around weight or for the system to sound public alarms.
Obviously, people have the right to do whatever they want--but the disclosure just isn't there and people are being sold this stuff based on the idea it'll make them *healthier* and prevent disease. It can't and it won't.
If the claims here about weight in general are new to you, start here: (Don't love the title of the article, second the exasperation)
If you want to understand more about glp-1 agonists specifically, like, start with the Wikipedia article and do some googling it lays out the pharmacology in relatively plain language. Sry i ain't doing a buncha work to find citations ppl won't click; there's not a lot of good critical stuff out there that's actually published but it doesn't actually take a lot of reading up on critical weight science to form a critical take on the sources singing ozempics praises.
Peace, good luck, do whatever you want forever, maybe tell ur mom that this isn't any different from the disastrous weight loss fads of the 90s.
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Allâs fair in love and⌠airports? - n.rk
Summery: what happens when your already stressful travel day home for the holidays is further ruined by some random emo kid at the airport
stranger!riki x fem!reader
warnings: Riki is a menace, strangers to enemies to ??, kms jokes
Masterlist
Whatâs the best part of traveling on one of the busiest travel days of the year? Well thatâs easy, there isnât one! Well, thatâs what you believed when you stepped out of your cab at the airport.
Breathe Y/N⌠just get through TSA⌠youâll be fine
You step through the doors heading straight for the TSA line, the large LED sign above your head saying âwait time: approx 45+ minutesâ. It took every last piece of self control to not audibly groan
Great off to an amazing start
You pop your headphones over your head in hopes to somehow speed up the process.
After about 15 minutes of scrolling on Instagram you decide to look around and gauge how far youâve moved in relation to how close you are to the front of the line. As you do an in depth scan of your surroundings you notice a boy, possibly your age, walking in your direction on the other side of the line divider.
Heâs wearing all black. Black jacket, black pants, black bag, and black hair with bangs that cover his eyes just enough to tell you all you need to know. He wanted to be here just as much as you did. His hoodie pulled up just enough to stay on his head while also not completely shading his face. His lips formed a frown that just screams talk to me I dare you. As you find yourself over analyzing his appearance you quickly avert your eyes back to your phone.
As you inch through the security line, this process continues. You scroll on whatever social media that momentarily entertains you until you notice heâs coming near you. At that point you only partially pay attention to your phone as you continuously eye him until the two of you cross paths and you have to wait until you progress farther down the line so that youâre facing him again. He hasnât made any indication that heâs noticed your ogling yet and before you know it youâve crossed his path for what would probably be the last time as youâve reached the front of the line.
âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸
After being yelled at by TSA to remember to take everything out of your bag and your person, you finally breathe the closest thing to fresh air youâll probably have until you exit the terminal on the other end of your flight.
Ok⌠good job Y/N⌠hardest part over with.
As you treck to your gate, that is conveniently placed as far as possible down the terminal from where you exited TSA, you grab some snacks to tide you over for the moment. Now nearing your gate, the lord and savior must be smiling down on you or something because thereâs a perfectly situated seat available right at your gate. A solo seat with an outlet, table, and perfect view out the window. You know where your path leads you next so you head straight for the seat. What you fail to notice is a shadow moving towards that exact seat.
When you think youâre in the clear, you see mystery mad (cute) boy from TSA block is butt down in the seat, your seat.
In an effort to avoid the embarrassment of having your seat stolen you divert your path to another nearby seat. I mean, he probably didnât see you right? Well, thatâs what you thought until you look back at him from your seat and he sits back all relaxed and cozy with a smirk on his face. He even quirks an eyebrow when you make eye contact as if to say âtoo slow loserâ
With the most dramatic eye roll you can muster you divert your focus back to your phone in frustration since youâre now unable to watch out the window.
Seriously, I canât even have an airport crush in peaceâŚ
Taking a deep breath you calm yourself as you wait patiently in your seat for your boarding group to be called. Which was proven to be a hard task when little emo boy (as youâve unaffectionately nicknamed him) making eye contact with you every 5-10 minutes with that stupid smirk on his face as if he just beat you for a prize of a million bucks not some stupid seat in an airport terminal
Once I get on this plane I wonât have to deal with him anymore⌠deep breathes Y/NâŚ
âNow boarding group 3 for United flight 384 with full service to Chicagoâ
Finally⌠you cheer mentally as you gather your belongings to get in the boarding line.
âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸
Letâs just say your little moment of happiness was cut short when the second you step towards the queue, a massive black figure blocked your path abruptly causing you to nearly run into it.
âDo you mind?â A deep voice comes from the dark being
âYou literally walked in front of me⌠I donât see how this is my faultâ you scoff as you look him in the eyes
Of course itâs this fucking twerp
âMy apologies, Iâm very high sighted, I have a problem seeing things below 5 feetâ he smirks and walks off
Youâre sat there stunned. I swear there was probably smoke coming out of your ears as you fumed in anger
I know for a fact that Hot Topic reject did NOT just insult my height
After you got over your momentary freeze, you continued to the boarding line trying to resolve the extreme amount of anger you felt at the moment.
As you finally step foot on the aircraft, you move with the traffic to your placing your roller bag above your head before turning to your row to sit down. But what you saw made you want to turn around and run off the plane screaming âBOMB!â at full volume.
There, in the seat next to yours, sat the boy who has decided his ultimate goal of the holiday season was to make sure you had the worst day ever.
At least I have the window
âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸
They shouldâve put me in an exit row so I could rip open the door and jump out
Itâs been just over an hour since the flight took off. With a little over an hour remaining, youâve never wished you could be anywhere else more than in this very moment. Why? Well youâve found yourself in what could only be described as the fiercest battle of your life. The battle⌠for the armrest.
âDo you mind?â You glare at the boy who youâve been shoving your elbow against for close to 15 minutes now.
âI literally have the middle seat, itâs common knowledge the middle should be allowed to have the armrestâ he argues back. âItâs common decencyâ
âOh yeaâ you scoff âlike I should be taking lectures from youâ you roll your eyes and proceed to shove his arm off the armrest again.
âOh come onâ he rolls his eyes before turning to you, âif youâre going to be this childish, we can just shareâ he scoffs laying his arm on top of yours.
âYou knowâŚâ you look at him âif you wanted to hold my hand so bad you couldâve just said soâ you smirk at him
His eyes shoot down now realizing that his large hand was now resting on top of your much smaller one.
He immediately retracts his hand scoffing âas ifâŚâ
And just like that you had the armrest to yourself for the rest of the flight.
âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸ âď¸
The ding of the seatbelt sign turning off was more satisfying than youâd ever imagined it could be. You exhale out of relief when you finally get to stretch your legs and walk down the aisle with your bags knowing that once you got out into the terminal, you were free of this parasite in the form of a wanna be grim reaper.
The lights of the terminal felt a little bit brighter as you walked towards baggage claim. Youâre finally in the home stretch. All thatâs left is to get your bag and meet your parents at arrivals and you get to put this whole nightmare behind you.
You approach the carousel and you immediately block the dark presence that you canât seem to lose. You immediately move to the opposite side as the alarm blares and the conveyor begins to move. A breath of relief leaves your lips as you see your black suitcase. You approach the conveyor and reach for the suitcase but as your hand comes in contact with the handle, it also comes in contact with another hand.
As the two of you pull the suitcase off the belt you turn to face the person and of course youâre met with the same dark eyes that have been tantalizing you all day.
âYou can let go of my bag nowâŚâ you glare up at him
âHow do you know this isnât my bagâ he smirks down at you.
âLook dipshit, I hope youâve had fun making my life hard all day, but this has my name on it unless you want the claim the pink ribbon tag as your ownâ you shove his hand off of the suitcase ânow piss offâ you turn away and walk away from him towards the doors. Towards freedom. But before you have the ability to escape you feel a tug on your wrist.
You turn around to face him again âwhat nowâ youâre clearly not impressed by the tone of your voice.
âI-Iâ his demeanor has completely changed now. He wonât meet your gaze as he fumbles out âIâm sorry⌠I guess I thought you were cute and⌠it was so fun to tease you but⌠I took it too farâ his hand still holding your wrist as he looks down at the floor âI⌠just wanted to let you know before you left. I know there isnât much I can do⌠but I really am sorryâ
You gently remove your wrist from his grasp as you look at him with an unreadable expression
âI-I guess Iâll let you go nowâ he starts to back away but before you can turn away you stop him.
âWell⌠I guess youâll have to give me your number so you can make it up to meâ you smirk at him.
He looks at you with wide eyes, mouth slightly agape before he snaps out of it and fumbles to get his phone out of his pocket.
âO-oh⌠um⌠y-yeaâŚâ he takes your phone trying to suppress the smile by nibbling on his bottom lip as he hands it back to you. He stares at you with a slight star struck gaze. But when he finally snaps out of it, youâve already started walking away.
âIâll text you⌠uhhhhâ he hesitates just now realizing he doesnât know what youâre name is
âitâs Y/Nâ
âYea⌠Iâll text you Y/N!â He calls out to you
âIâll look forward to it little emo boyâ you call back before continuing to walk away.
âItâs riki!â He calls once more before you go out of sight. He does a little celebration to himself, not minding the obvious stares of judgement and curiosity from onlookers in the terminal. As he collects his bags finally his phone buzzes in his pocket.
I had the idea for this while I was on the plane home for the holidays so I hope everyone likes it!
#enha#enhypen#fluff#enha fluff#enhypen fluff#enha niki#niki fluff#niki scenarios#niki x reader#enhypen niki#nishimura riki#Niki#enha riki#riki scenarios#riki#riki fluff#enhypen riki#riki x reader#enhypen imagines#Heeseung#Jay#Jake#Sunghoon#Sunoo#Jungwon#enhypen jake#enhypen jay#enhypen heeseung#enhypen sunoo#enhypen sunghoon
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For Tomorrow's Sake âËđŤâ đđđđŁđ đđŁđđđŚđđđ đ¤đđđđ
various!jjk x f!reader
reverse harem, isekai, jujutsu kaisen x fem!reader, slowburn
You never believed reincarnation was possible, least of all in the fictional world of Jujutsu Kaisen. However, from the moment you meet Gojo Satoru, itâs impossible to deny. Whether itâs a miracle or some kind of curse, you find yourself growing up alongside the strongest jujutsu sorcerer. Unfortunately, you know what the future holds in store. You know exactly what kind of tragedies await. Perhaps thatâs why you were brought into this world. If it means saving people from a gruesome fate, youâll gladly suffer in their place. Youâll do whatever it takes. All for the sake of a better tomorrow.
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Toji finds himself at a loss for words.  Â
Today, he made up his mind to pay a visit to the so-called 'strongest' sorcerer, Gojo Satoru. He wanted to witness the pinnacle of jujutsu for himself. To see, with his own eyes, what someone truly blessedâin all the ways he isnât âcan amount to.  Â
Toji was already surprised that Satoru took note of him. Never in his life has anyone else been able to do that. It seems it really is true. That a mere child possesses power beyond anyoneâs wildest dreams. However, right now, heâs surprised for a different reason entirely.  Â
And of course, that reason is you .  Â
Toji blinks. He canât help but wonder if he must be imagining things. It wouldnât make much sense otherwise. Thereâs no rational explanation for whatâs happening. Did some strange little girl seriously just walk up to him and ask for his help?  Â
âWhat,â Toji simply replies. Itâs not even really a question. Rather, heâs in disbelief. And youâre still standing in front of him, looking up at him with hope and admiration.  Â
To be honest, no one has ever looked at him that way. Â
âI want to become strong, just like you,â you repeat, and even now, your smile shows no signs of disappearing. âSince you donât have any cursed energy, by any chance, do you⌠fight using cursed tools? Because Iâd like to try learning how to use them as well. Iâve been looking for someone to help train me.â  Â
Satoru gapes at you. âUh, [Name]? What are you saying? You canât just ask some random weirdo to train you! We donât even know who he is!â  Â
âItâs not nice to call people weirdos, Satoru. Especially when you barely know them.â  Â
âEither way, heâs still a stranger! Why did you even walk up to him in the first place? Youâre seriously crazy!â  Â
Toji blinks yet again. Is this⌠some kind of joke? A comedy routine? Standing right in front of him is Gojo Satoru, hailed as the pride and joy of the jujutsu world. Even as young as he currently is, he can go head-to-head with the most formidable, elite sorcerersâand not only that, but heâd win .  Â
A few moments ago, Toji felt a chill in the air, and it wasnât due to the cold winter breeze. When Satoru turned towards him, with those eerie, piercing blue eyes of his, Toji immediately felt inferior. Even more so than he already did. Heâs not the type to get intimidated, and yet, there was no denying the sheer pressure behind that young boyâs gaze. Â
Except now, that pressure is gone.  Â
All Toji sees is two stupid, bickering kids.  Â
âWeâre leaving,â Satoru grits out. He glares pointedly up at Toji, still with his little arms wrapped around you, and the expression he makes is juvenile, or rather, childish . Because technically, he is a child.  Â
Toji just stands there with a frown. Heâs heard of Gojo Satoru, of course, but he has absolutely no idea who youâre supposed to be. A relative, perhaps? Or a friend? But you just said that youâre not strong. Thatâs why you want to get stronger. Would the Gojo Clan really permit their prized jewel to waste time frolicking with some talentless little brat?  Â
âI canât leave yet,â you insist. Satoru tries to pull you along, but you root your feet firmly into the ground, making it clear that youâre not going anywhere. Then you look back at Toji and smile once again. âWhat do you say, mister? Would you be willing to help train me? Iâm [Name], by the way. Whatâs your name?â  Â
âStop it!â Satoru fumes. âYou shouldnât go around telling strangers your name!â  Â
âBut you already said my name earlier, and he obviously heard it. Silly Satoru. Always getting worked up for no reason. Donât worry, I got this. Just watch and learn.â  Â
You grin confidently, and Toji canât help but marvel at your idiocy. Or perhaps itâs lunacy. Either way, it doesnât make much of a difference.  Â
âNo,â he replies, watching as your expression drops. âWhy should I train some brat I just met? You must have lived a very sheltered life until now, if you feel comfortable going around asking others for favors.â  Â
Satoru furiously grinds his teeth together. âHow dare you. You donât know anything about her. Rotten old fart. [Name]âs life has been anything but sheltered. If you donât shut up, Iâll kick your ass.â Â
âIâm nowhere near as old as you seem to think I am,â Toji scowls.  Â
Whatever. Heâs had enough foolishness for one day. He already did what he set out to do. He came here to steal a glimpse of Gojo Satoru, and all it did was sour his mood even more. Heâs better off walking away before he loses his temper.  Â
And so, he leaves. Or at least, he tries to.  Â
Youâve grabbed onto his arm and are refusing to let go.  Â
âPlease at least hear me out, mister,â you insist. Toji stares down at you in stark disbelief, and meanwhile, Satoru outright gasps. Honestly, he kind of looks like heâs about to pass out. Your never-ending antics really arenât good for his heart.  Â
Itâs absurd. Two little kids are basically playing tug-of-war at Tojiâs expense. Of course, he could push you back with ease, although something tells him the strongest jujutsu sorcerer wouldnât take too kindly to that. Which just makes it even more tempting, truthfully. Toji already resents the world of jujutsu as it is. Perhaps purposefully angering Gojo Satoru, even at the risk of his own life, might give him some relief.  Â
He could do it. He could pick a fight if he really wanted to. Also, thereâs no guarantee heâd lose. Maybe he should give it a try. If he were to somehow win against this spoiled brat whoâs been blessed with everything he could ever dream of⌠maybe finally, the Zenâin Clan would acknowledge him.  Â
The longer Toji stares into Satoruâs pale, blindingly blue eyes, the more he feels like testing his luck. The more he itches to bring the world of jujutsu sorcerers, and everything it stands for, crumbling into pieces.  Â
But he doesnât.  Â
Your next words resonate with him more than he could ever have imagined.  Â
âMy family hated me because I was so weak,â you say, keeping your little hands tightly wrapped around Tojiâs arm as you stare up at him, gaze solemn and determined. âThey told me I was worthless, and that I would never amount to anything. My dad beat me really badly one day because he was so embarrassed of me. Iâm sure it would have kept happening if Satoru hadnât offered to let me live with him instead. I might not have zero cursed energy, like you, but I barely have enough to qualify as a sorcerer, and everyone always looks down on me for it. I think itâs unfair how some people get judged and cast aside, before they get the chance to prove themselves. Even if you donât have any cursed energy, itâs obvious to me that youâre really strong. And it makes me feel like I could maybe be strong one day, too. I know it probably sounds like a hassle, but is there even a chance you might consider it? I couldâoh, I know! I could pay you. Would you do it then? If I paid you enough?â Â
Yet again, Toji finds himself at a loss for words.  Â
âUm⌠unfortunately, this is all I have on me right now.â You dig into your yukata and pull out a few wrapped candies, then gently place them into Tojiâs open palm. He blinks, incredulous, as you smile once more. âIâll pay you with real money, of course. Think of these candies as a promise, or like a down payment. I live with the Gojo Clan, and theyâve got a lot of money. If you agree to help train me, you might even become rich.â  Â
Satoruâs jaw couldnât possibly be hanging any lower. â[Name], what the hell? I just told you to leave this geezer alone, and now youâre saying youâre going to pay him?!â Â
âWell, I wouldnât be the one paying, technically. Your relatives would.â  Â
âAnd youâre just assuming theyâll go along with this?!â  Â
âMaybe. If you do a good job of convincing them.â  Â
You grin widely. Toji is quickly realizing that youâre a cheeky little brat, and apparently, even Gojo Satoru doesnât quite know how to handle you. Not that it stops him from trying, though. Satoru grits his teeth as he struggles to pull you back. He must be consciously avoiding using his cursed energy, so as not to hurt you even a little. But without it, heâs physically no stronger than an ordinary seven-year-old kid. It also doesnât help that youâve latched onto Toji with seemingly all the strength you can muster. Â
God. This situation is so ridiculous, itâs almost laughable.  Â
âIâm not going!â you insist, burying your face in the sleeves of Tojiâs kimono as he sighs irritably. âYou canât make me, Satoru! I need to hear how this nice mister responds first! And even if he says no again, Iâm going to stay here until I change his mind!â  Â
Toji knits his brows together. âArenât you jumping to conclusions by assuming Iâm nice?â Â
âOh. Maybe. But I like to try and stay optimistic,â you beam.  Â
 âItâs called being dumb , not optimistic,â Satoru grimaces. âWe seriously need to go , already! Youâre taking things too far!â  Â
He must have just mustered up the nerve to strengthen himself using cursed energy, because finally, he manages to pull you away from Toji. You stumble backwards, losing your balance in the process, but Satoru catches you in his arms and holds you tight, refusing to let you break free again.  Â
Strange. Toji always imagined that the strongest would be elevated above everyone else, detached from reality, seemingly in a world of their own. Like some kind of deity, so to speak. At least, based on the way that everyone seems to worship him.  Â
But heâs actually⌠surprisingly human. He has someone he cherishes deeply and strives to protect.  Â
Toji isnât quite sure whether that makes him feel better or worse.  Â
âYouâre awfully chatty, even for a kid,â Toji remarks. He stares down at the candies you just placed in his hand, but rather than handing them back to you or tossing them aside, he just shrugs and places them in his pocket. âYou asked what my name was, didnât you? Itâs Zenâin Toji. You and that boy both belong to the Gojo Clan, so you must understand what this means. Our clans despise each other. Even if I agreed to help you, do you really think they would allow such a thing?â  Â
Right. You remember that was briefly touched on in the series. It had something to do with the former clan heads having killed each other in the past. The Gojo Clan and the Zenâin Clan have some particularly bad blood between them. Â
Then again, the past is the past. Whatâs done is already done. Thereâs no point in worrying about something you canât change.  Â
You must constantly face forward, towards the future .  Â
Toji canât possibly understand it, and neither can Satoru, for that matter, but itâs okay. Youâve already decided that this will be your burden to bear. So, yeah. You could care less about a petty feud between clans. Itâs nowhere near enough to deter you or keep you from accomplishing what youâve set out to do.  Â
âYeah. Iâve heard about it. I know that the Gojo Clan and Zenâin Clan donât like each other,â you say. Â
Toji nods. âGood. So, that means you understand howââ  Â
âI donât really care, though.â  Â
â...what?â  Â
âI donât care,â you repeat, and Toji canât help the way his eyes widen. âHow is it my fault that something like that happened a long time ago? Itâs not like I was involved. Itâs not like any of the people still alive today were involved either. Honestly, most jujutsu sorcerers are stupid. They care about stupid things and look down on others just because they donât align with what they think is right. They can be upset if they want to be. Iâm not trying to become stronger because I want anyoneâs approval. Iâm doing it because itâs important to me. So that I can protect the people I care about and make a difference. Even if others still consider me to be weak, based on their first impression of me⌠itâs fine. Because Iâll know theyâre wrong. And thatâs enough.â  Â
It really is absurd. What are you, six, seven years old? Youâre just a kid. Youâre supposed to be naive and ignorant to the harsh reality of the world.  Â
Yet, ironically, you sound more mature and clear-minded than any of the shitty, elitist adults Toji has ever known.  Â
This time, he really canât help it.  Â
He laughs.  Â
âHaha⌠ha!â Toji throws his head back, eyes squeezed shut, as the laughter rumbles up from deep inside his belly. Itâs honestly cathartic. He canât remember the last time he laughed this hard. In fact, he canât remember the last time he laughed at all .  Â
Satoru pulls you even further back and shudders. âUgh. This guy seriously gives me the creeps. [Name], Iâm telling you, heâs bad news.â  Â
âIf he wanted to hurt me, Iâm sure he would have already done it by now,â you shrug.  Â
âWhat kind of reasoning is thatâŚ?â  Â
âAh, thatâs funny,â Toji keeps on laughing. He pauses to wipe the small tears that have formed in his eyes, then grins. âI didnât know kids could be so entertaining. You seem much smarter than I initially gave you credit for. Youâre probably smarter than the entire Zenâin Clan. Those bastards canât even tell the difference between a head and an ass.â  Â
âNow heâs even comparing heads and asses,â Satoru whispers in your ear. âIâm starting to think he might be a pervert, too.â  Â
Toji slowly turns away. âDonât change your way of thinking. Itâd be a shame. Youâre right that jujutsu sorcerers are all a bunch of idiots. This whole world theyâve built up is a joke. Like you said, they refuse to acknowledge anything that doesnât align with their own beliefs. Theyâre all pathetic, narrow-minded scum.â  Â
Wow. Is Toji really venting to you right now? Meeting Satoru was one thing, but surely, you could never have been prepared for something like this .  Â
It makes you happy, though. If it brings him even a little bit of relief, youâll gladly listen to him complain, over and over again.  Â
âGoodbye, strange little girl,â Toji chuckles. â[Name], you said? Iâll remember it. This day turned out to be unexpectedly amusing.â  Â
âOh. Youâre leaving? But⌠you never answered my question,â you frown. âWill you help train me? Or at the very least, will you try to consider it?â  Â
Toji is already walking away, waving you off with the back of his hand, and Satoru will be damned if he lets you chase after him again.  Â
Still, all things considered, this encounter went a lot better than you thought it would. It was a long shot anyway. At least you tried.  Â
What you donât realize, however, is that Toji is still thinking of his meeting with you, even by the time he returns back to the Zenâin estate. He remembers your words from before, and as he passes by several clan members, somehow, their scornful looks donât bother him quite as much as they used to.  Â
Itâs a momentary reprieve, but heâs grateful for it.  Â
âAre you⌠Toji?â  Â
Toji turns his head. Heâs sitting out in the courtyard, and a child has just walked up to him. He seems to be having lots of encounters with children today, for whatever reason. Although this child isnât entirely unfamiliar to him. He recognizes him based on his appearance. After all, heâs the one rumored to take over as the leader of the clan one day. The youngest son of Zenâin Naobito. Naoya. Â
Toji doesnât bother responding. He just stares at him, with a sharp, unwavering gaze, and Naoya immediately freezes up. Â
Truth be told, Naoya came here to mock Toji. He planned on finally seeing for himself what the infamous man with no cursed energy was like. He wanted to get a glimpse of his sad, pitiful expression. To ridicule someone weaker than him. Â
Except Naoya canât seem to do that, because just by looking at Toji, he can tell. Â
This man is strong .  Â
Toji eventually turns away, still without uttering a single word, and Noaya watches as Toji pulls out the candies you handed him earlier. He stares at them, then chuckles. He isnât unwrapping them to eat them or anything. Itâs also strange that the coldness in his gaze has suddenly disappeared. His expression looks a bit more gentle now.  Â
Naoya swallows the lump in his throat and awkwardly approaches. âIs that candy? Do you⌠like sweets?â  Â
âHm? No, not really.â Â
âOh. Then whatâs the candy for?â  Â
Toji continues staring down at the palm of his hand. The silence feels unsettling to Naoya, especially because of the immense pressure Toji constantly exudes, but eventually, another chuckle can be heard.  Â
âThis isnât just candy,â Toji muses. âItâs⌠a down payment.âÂ
No matter how hard you try, there are bound to be some instances where things donât work out the way you want them to.  Â
Based on how Toji walked off without giving you a proper answer, naturally, you figure itâs a done deal. Itâs disappointing, of course, because you dared to imagine a world in which Toji doesnât go on to commit atrocities, but not everything can be changed. Not always.  Â
Youâre in for one hell of a surprise, though.  Â
â...heâs here,â Satoru mumbles one day, seemingly out of nowhere. You watch as his eyes widen, and he turns his head towards the entrance of the estate. âThat man we met a while ago. The one with no cursed energy. Heâs here .â  Â
âWhat?â  Â
You canât quite believe itâat least, not until you walk past all the buildings and see him with your own eyes.  Â
Once again, Toji stands in front of you. Â
âYay, Toji! You really came!â  Â
Without even thinking twice, you run up to him and attempt to wrap your little arms around his broad frame. Toji stands there, looking slightly taken aback, but he doesnât try to push you away, and that has to count for something, right?  Â
Satoru, however, looks like heâs about to throw a fit.  Â
â[Name]!â he fumes. âWhy are you hugging that creepy old guy? Itâs inappropriate! And besides, you should only be hugging me !â  Â
Despite Satoruâs protests, you continue to cling to Toji, because even if heâll never admit it, you know that he could really, really use a hug.  Â
Satoru mashes his teeth together in frustration, and he even shakes his small fist in the air. Which is probably intended to be a warning, but heâs ridiculously cute, so itâs not too effective, in your opinion. Â
Naturally, all of this commotion draws other people towards the source, and soon, you find yourself surrounded by several Gojo clan members.  Â
One of them gestures to you with a frown. â[Name]? Who is that man? Why did he just show up here all of a sudden?â  Â
âYou fool. Canât you tell just by looking at him?â another clan member mutters in distaste. âHe⌠has absolutely no cursed energy. And that scar across his lip. It must be him . The failure of the Zenâin Clan. Zenâin Toji.â  Â
The atmosphere shifts all too suddenly. Everyoneâs expressions are laden with disgust. Not only because of the general disdain sorcerers have towards those deemed as âweakâ, but also due to the fact that heâs a Zenâin. In the eyes of the Gojo Clan, thatâs the worst possible combination.  Â
Toji chuckles as he pats you on the head. âNot quite the welcoming I was hoping for. It seems not everyone is as friendly as you are, [Name].â  Â
Honestly, you canât even really focus on the tension right now, because Toji just patted you on the head.  Â
Hehe. Iâm happy.  Â
âState your business,â one of the clan members mutters. âYou should know better than to show up unannounced.â  Â
âWell, thatâs rude. Especially when Iâm here to do one of you a favor.â Everyone blinks, clearly in disbelief, as Toji peers down at you. âRight, [Name]? Didnât you ask me to help train you before?â  Â
âR-Really? Youâll⌠actually do it?â  Â
You marvel at the sudden declaration. Of course, the clan members are becoming more infuriated by the second, and Satoru doesnât look too happy about it either. He actually looks like heâs itching to kick Toji in the nuts.  Â
A clan member steps forward, teeth bared. âUnder no circumstances will a member of the Zenâin Clan have any part inââ  Â
âShut up,â Satoru glares. âLet [Name] speak. I want to hear what she has to say first.â  Â
He turns back towards you, and even though he clearly has his doubts about Toji, for your sake, he might be willing to give him a chance.  Â
âWell? Are you sure you really want this guy to train you? Does it have to be him?â Â
You look up at Toji. Admittedly, his character was far from innocent in the canon series. He chose to abandon his son and become an assassin. Nobody forced that life upon him. Ultimately, his demise was his own doing.  Â
But it probably wouldnât have happened if only heâd been accepted in the first place. If only he hadnât been treated like an outcast and made to resent the world he grew up in.  Â
Even though you might not succeed, youâre going to try and help him.  Â
âYes,â you nod emphatically, hugging Toji even tighter than before. âI donât want anyone else to teach me. It has to be him.â  Â
Satoru sighs. He wishes you didnât have to make things so difficult. Heâs never had a friend before, but ever since you stepped into his life, heâs been worrying about you practically nonstop. Youâre honestly quite the hassle.  Â
But then again, youâre worth it.  Â
âAnd are you going to train her properly?â Satoru asks, now addressing Toji with a stern gaze. âIâm telling you right now, but youâre not allowed to hurt her. Not even a little bit. Iâm going to be watching your training sessions to make sure you donât do anything stupid. If at any point sheâs in danger⌠Iâll seriously make sure you regret it.â  Â
Toji shrugs. âSure. It would be pretty pathetic if I didnât know how to hold back against a little kid.â  Â
Satoru stares at Toji for a while longer, eyes narrowed in scrutiny, but youâve spent enough time with him by now to be able to read his expressions, and you can tell that heâs just about to give in.  Â
Finally, he nods.  Â
âOkay, then. You can train [Name]. I give you permission.â  Â
Your eyes light up, and you even let out a squeal of delight as you excitedly jump in place, still clinging to Toji all the while. He obviously doesnât react with the same kind of enthusiasm, but as he looks down at your tiny little frame, he finds a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. Even if youâre just a little kid, it feels nice to finally be acknowledged by someone. Â
It would be great if you could just wrap this up on a high note, but of course, things are never that easy.  Â
âMaster Satoru,â one of the clan members gapes. âWhat in the world are you saying? We refuse to condone this. The nerve of this talentless Zenâin trash to even step foot here, let alone insert himself into your lives⌠itâs ludicrous. We simply wonât hear of it.â  Â
You frown. âBut I promised to pay Toji in exchange for him training me. Why is it such a big deal? Clans should be helping each other out, not hating each other. It would be way more productive if everyone cooperated. Isnât our goal supposed to be getting rid of curses and keeping people safe?â   Â
âYou want to pay him? Absolutely not! How dare you even suggest such a thing!â  Â
âUh oh,â Toji chuckles, messily ruffling your hair. âIt looks like theyâre getting really angry now. I guess itâs a good thing I decided that I donât actually need to be paid.â  Â
You blink, incredulous. âYou⌠donât?â  Â
âNo. Itâs fine. If doing this pisses off your clan, as well as those in the Zenâin Clan⌠thatâs already more than enough for me.â Â
A prideful smirk sweeps across Tojiâs face. It looks like he wants to stick it to the man, so to speak. Heâd much rather get under the skin of those whoâve wronged him than have some extra cash to spend. Well, not that you care exactly what his motivations are. Heâs agreed to help you, and thatâs already more than enough.  Â
One of the clan members takes a deep, shuddering breath, and in the next moment, you can tell that their cursed energy has spiked.  Â
â Leave ,â they demand. âThis is your last chance. Otherwise, weâll have no choice but toââ  Â
âDidnât I already tell you to shut up?â  Â
Itâs Satoru, of course. Heâs staring at them with an irritable expression, and he even walks up to you and Toji and assumes a protective stance.  Â
â[Name] says she wants this guy to train her, so heâs going to train her,â Satoru mutters. âIâm not too happy about it either, but this is what sheâs decided, so Iâm going to support her. If any of you have a problem with that, we can just leave. Iâll take [Name] far, far away from here and never come back. Iâll leave the Gojo Clan forever. Is that what you want?â  Â
Neither of them respond, but you can tell that internally, theyâre panicking. Sure enough, if Satoru really wanted to, he could overpower everyone here and do as he pleases. Thereâs no way to force him into anything. All of his diligence towards his training up until now⌠heâs been doing it out of a sense of obligation, not because he doesnât have the strength to object. Heâs been going along with everyoneâs demands because heâs the strongest. Because the fate of the world hangs on his shoulders. Â
When it comes to you, however, he can be awfully selfish. And everyone in the Gojo Clan already knows that.  Â
â...fine.â  Â
Their faces are bitter, ashamed, and resentful, but nevertheless, they have no choice but to concede. The embarrassment of relying on a Zenâin Clan member is nothing compared to the risk of losing Gojo Satoru. Â
You smile yet again. So, itâs really happening. Youâre not sure how, but you actually managed to pull it off.  Â
From this moment onward, Toji is your mentor.  Â
âIâll do my best,â you beam, eyes brighter than ever. âIâll train my butt off, and I promise I wonât ever complain, no matter how hard it gets. Youâre going to be super impressed. Just wait and see!â  Â
Perhaps this is nothing more than the silly, idealistic ramblings of an ignorant child. Children like to say all kinds of things, after all. They make big, grandiose promises that they canât keep. And they constantly exaggerate, making their feats seem larger than life itself. Â
And yet, Toji feels inclined to believe you.  Â
âVery well,â he chuckles fondly. âIâll hold you to that, so show me. Show me⌠how youâre going to prove everyone wrong.â  Â
#jjk x reader#jujutsu kaisen x reader#gojo x reader#nanami x reader#geto x reader#choso x reader#toji x reader#naoya x reader#sukuna x reader#jjk#jjk fluff#jjk fic#jjk fic rec#fic rec#for tomorrow's sake#jujutsu kaisen x you#mahito x reader#gojo satoru#geto suguru#jujutsu kaisen#ryomen sukuna#choso kamo#mahito#quotev#ao3#nanami kento#toji fushiguro#naoya zenin#toji zenin#reverse harem x reader
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Not Yet Day 10 - Surprise Visit Love and Deepspace Sylus x f!OC 1431 Words Read on Ao3 banner by firefly-graphics
âCalli, you never mentioned that your boyfriend was loaded!â
Pulling her head out of her scrubs, Calli blinked at the woman that had swung around the lockers to face her. âHuh?â
She rolled her eyes before shaking a finger at her. âYour man. Not only is he good looking but heâs loaded as well?â
âProbably loaded in other ways too,â another voice chirped from the other side of the lockers, causing laughter through the room.
âWhere is this coming from?â Calli asked warily, tugging her t-shirt down over her belly.
The other nurseâs eyes widened suddenly. âOh, you didnât know?â
âThat heâs loaded? I already knew that.â
âWell, youâll see soon enough!â
âWait!â she said sharply as the other turned sharply to run away. âWhat the fuck are you talking about?!â
No answer came and she had the distinct impression that everyone was getting out of the locker room as quickly as they could.
Calli huffed to herself. What the hell was going on? Why would she suddenly mention Sylus like that? Sheâd never really hid the fact that she had a boyfriend. It would have been idiotic given how Sylus liked showing up to pick her up whenever he could and showing that they were very much together. But she didnât talk much about what he did or where he came from. It was hard to keep the others at bay but most of them had picked up on the fact that she didnât want to talk much about it.
Of course, that meant they started making things up. Government secret agent, mafia boss, playboy billionaire. Those were only the latest guesses sheâd heard thrown around and she refused to acknowledge that she had heard them. They were having fun and Sylus always thought it was amusing when she told him.
But why would she say that?
Rolling up her scrubs, she tucked them into her bag and hefted it up. She needed to get home quickly so she could start prepping for tomorrow. While she was excited about having everyone over for holiday dinner, she wasnât sure how it was going to go. So she wanted to get as much done tonight as she could and try to have a good nightâs sleep. Then she could be ready for whatever chaos came from dinner.
She pulled on her jacket and started for the door. With any luck, transit wouldnât be too bad and there wouldnât be any hassles getting-
âWhere are you taking her?â
âIt better be somewhere nice!â
âOr maybe you should get her a ring!â
Calli paused at the chorus of voices that sounded suspiciously like the girls she worked with. Peeking around a corner, something odd happened. Her heart somehow sank and leapt at the same time. Sylus was standing near the nurses station, completely surrounded by the rest of her shift. It was them peppering him with questions! What were they doing? And what was he doing here? Heâd told her heâd be busy until dinner tomorrow, wrapping up everything he could before they went on their holiday. Had he lied or had he actually wrapped up early?
âSheâs deciding where weâre going.â Sylusâ smooth voice reached her, amusement laced through it. âOnly she knows if itâs nice or not.â
âBut youâre paying for it?â
âI am.â
âYou also didnât answer about the ring,â someone said slyly.
Her heart leapt into her throat and she hurried around the corner. Theyâd only been together a few months! What were they doing?! She didnât want them to ask and she absolutely did not want him to answer!
She didnât know if he heard her or if he somehow felt her approaching but Sylus looked up suddenly. She saw the smile spread across his face before his gaze dropped back down to the other nurses. âA ring?â he mused. âI wouldnât be opposed but-â
âWhat are you doing here?â Calli interrupted, jerking to a halt on the other side of the small crowd.
The nurses all spun to face her before they all hurriedly left, saying their goodbyes and holiday wishes. Sylus continued to watch her with a smile, one eyebrow raised at her outburst. âHello, sweetie,â he murmured, leaning down to meet her.
She reached up and covered his mouth with both of her hands. âWhy would you answer that?â she whispered. âTheyâre just trying to get a rise out of you.â
He caught her wrists and pulled them away from his mouth. âI donât think Iâm the one they were trying to get a rise out of.â
Calli huffed, shaking her head. âBut what are you doing here? Did you wrap up everything early?â
Sylus hummed, letting go of her wrists. One hand stroked over her hair while the other threaded their fingers together. âI did so I thought I would come help you tonight.â
And spend more time with you. The sentiment was unspoken but she heard it loud and clear. âIâd like that.â
Another smile before he was leading her away from the station where the girls were still watching them like hawks, waiting for more information. His almost comment on the ring was going to make the rounds but hopefully that would die down by the time she got back. Hopefully.
She gave a little wave as people chirped their goodbyes as they walked past but Sylus didnât stop to let her talk to them. She didnât mind. Her thoughts were starting to pile up with all the things they needed to do to prep for tomorrow. It would be a little easier with him there but maybe she could fit in a few more things so they could relax more tomorrow. Maybe-
A small noise left her when Sylus tugged gently on her hand before wrapping an arm around her waist.
âYouâre overthinking it,â he said without looking, leading her out the door. âWeâll do what we can and finish the rest tomorrow.â
âBut-â
âKitten, we have time.â
She puffed out her cheeks before sighing. He was right. Sheâd had enough time when it was just her. With him there, they could finish early, maybe enjoy dinner together before tucking in for the rest of the night. She didnât say anything as he took her to his car and helped her into the passenger seat. Instead, she just snuggled into it.
His laughter roused her a little bit as he pulled away from the hospital. âComfortable?â
âItâs better than the bus,â she teased, making him chuckle.
âI should hope so.â
Calli smiled and almost purred as a large hand came to rest on her thigh. âDefinitely donât have that on the bus,â she murmured.
His fingers tightened for a moment. âI should hope not.��
It was her turn to laugh before they fell into a comfortable silence. But he didnât let it last for long.
âBlack diamonds,â he said quietly. âPlatinum.â
She frowned, turning to him. âWhat?â
âI said I wasnât opposed to it, kitten. Do you really think I havenât thought about it?â
Her frown deepened. What was he talking about? Opposed to what? What would he be using diamonds and platinum-Calli froze in her seat, staring at him. âSylus....â
âMaybe I should,â he mused. âItâs just a ring.â
Her heart thumped in her chest, her pulse ringing in her ears. âYou....â
He caught her hand and brought it to his lips. She didnât miss which finger he kissed. âBut you donât let me buy you jewellery,â he continued. âYou donât take it when I try to give it to you. Would you turn me down if I gave you a ring?â
She didnât know what to say, her thoughts whirling again but going in a completely different direction.
Scarlet eyes slid to her and his lips quirked up. âWhat are you thinking about to look like that, sweetie? Canât a man give his lover a gift?â
âBut a ring?â she squeaked.
âWhatâs wrong with that?â he asked smoothly. âItâs just a ring. What do you think it is?â
She didnât know what to think! Was he serious that it was just a ring because the girls were absolutely not asking about just a ring earlier? Or was he teasing her and actually being serious?
Another look and a soothing squeeze of her hand. âBut I didnât get to finish,â Sylus said quietly. âWhile Iâm not opposed, I know itâs not time.â
Her heart was back to pounding wildly at the mere thought that he wanted that with her. Because she heard the unspoken yet at the end of his sentence.
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Lost In Control | Bad Omens | CHAPTER 24
adult content | minors do NOT interact.
â đđđđđđđ. Bad Omens X ex-girlfriend and singer!Reader.
â đđđđđđđđ. You and Noah had a difficult ending but you still need to support each other for the band.
â đđđđđđđ(đ). melancholy, ex-boyfriends, difficult relationships, alcohol abuse, swearing, drug addiction, violence.
It's okay to not agree with the characters' attitudes during the fic. It's good to remember that the story is fiction from the author's sick mind and of course they will make dubious decisions according to my fantasies. Nothing is done to be compared to reality.
NOAH
"It's important to stay well-hydrated, eat properly, and maintain a good sleep routine. Itâs not like this feeling will disappear overnight, but a lifestyle more focused on your well-being might helpâŚâ
My attention was fixed on the hourglass on his desk, the sand sliding down into the lower compartment at a slow rhythm. If I said I was paying attention to anything, Iâd be lying. Ever since I walked into this room, Iâd been high on intravenous medication and completely oblivious to what was happening around me, slouched in a position in this chair that would surely give me a backache once I returned to my senses.
I didnât know it was possible to feel even more apathetic.
âI can refer you to regular sessions with a professionalâwhat do you think?â he pressed, trying to regain my attention again. âYour tests didnât reveal anything I should worry about, but if these symptoms persist, it would be wise to seek a second opinion. It could help, considering your physical reactions are becoming increasingly severe.â
I let out a scoffing laugh without looking at him.
âDo you think Iâm losing my mind?â
âI think your body is sending signals that it needs care. Thatâs common when patients are going through difficult times or even under pressure.â The deeper he delved into the topic, the more nausea churned in my stomach. I sighed as though trying to reclaim air in a near reflux. âHave you experienced anything like that? Feeling trapped in a state of excessive melancholy that seems to take longer to pass with each episode?â
Absolute silence.
âDo you think Iâm planning to kill myself?â I asked with irony. âMy contract doesnât allow that.â
âI think it would be wise to take some time off to rest.â
I had a flight with the band in two hours, two festivals over the span of a week in different countries. Resting was only an option in my dreamsâand even then, there was a risk Iâd be working in them.
âCan I ask you something?â I finally shifted my attention from the hourglass to the man in a lab coat with graying hair behind the desk.
âOf course, Noah.â
âThe girl who brought me hereâsheâs still in the hospital?â I asked carefully, biting down on my lower lip.
The doctor looked at me for a few seconds as if reading my microexpressions or whatever the hell I carried in my eyes. I felt a faint discomfort, but it wasnât greater than the curiosity clawing at the inside of my skin.
âI canât say for sure, Noah, but thereâs a girl listed as your contact in your file. Iâm just not sure if itâs the same person weâre talking about.â
I hated how my body reacted immediately, as though erasing the entire conversation about the studio and clinging solely to the fact that she might still be hereâwith me. Nothing else seemed to matter, none of the other things I was feeling, because somehow, she managed to give me the false sense that my heart was at peace again.
Like at the studio, when the touch of her hand silenced the chaos in my mind, even if it was just a fleeting truce, since everything came back threefold the moment she moved away.
I must have been losing my mind. I no longer had any awareness of my actions or control over them. I couldnât filter my feelings, making them even more confusing each time I smothered them with some new, unrestrained emotion.
As I exited the consultation room, I saw nothing but other patients waiting to be seen. Gradually, I let my shoulders drop while I walked, scanning the reception area with slow steps when I didnât see any sign of her around. What passed through my head wasnât disappointmentâcertainly not.
A sudden jolt from physical contact made me turn sharply, my brow furrowing as I saw a girl greeting me with a hug I didnât reciprocate, keeping my arms stiff at my sides. I blinked a few times before looking down and seeing the fiery red hair on top of her head.
âScarlet?â I asked, confused.
âWhen I returned to the observation room, they told me you had woken up and gone to see the doctor. How are you feeling?â she asked sweetly, frowning as I moved her away from me by grabbing her arm.
âWhat are you doing here?â
âAre you disoriented from the meds? I received you at the hospital on behalf of the record labelâs team and have been accompanying you ever since, silly!â
âButâŚâ
Had I been mixing things up? As far as I remembered, it wasnât Scarlet who had been with me when I arrived here or when the medication knocked me out. But was I coherent enough to argue? My head was beginning to throb again, and my thoughts were as tangled as the sequence of events.
I definitely didnât remember this particular cut.
âHow about lunch? Thereâs a restaurant nearby thatââ
âI just want to go home.â I interrupted while craning my neck to look around.
âAlright, Iâll drive you!â she replied with unshakable enthusiasm, and I let out a deep sigh.
âIsnât there anyone else who can do that?â
âNoah, you donât have to be so hard on me, okay? I know youâd rather have someone else in my place, but thereâs not much I can do if she didnât want it that way!â Scarletâs tone was almost offended as she shrugged. âLet me help youâI promise thatâs all I want.â
Meeting her bright green eyes as she fluttered her long lashes, I just turned around and started walking toward the exit. Scarlet sighed in satisfaction behind me, following like a duckling trailing after its mother.
On the way to the car, I tried to pull as much as I could from my worn-out mind, demanding myself to recall the route from the studio and my time in the hospital, but it felt as though a gaping hole had formed in my memory.
âI have good news for you!â she said, tapping her fingertips together as she closed the driverâs door.
âI donât like people beating around the bush. Be direct.â
âWellâŚâ Scarlet cleared her throat awkwardly. âBryan has to miss the bandâs trips this week, and Iâll be replacing him as the photographer. Isnât that amazing?â
I was still searching for the âgoodâ part of the news.
âSince when do you need to take band photography jobs?â I asked, perplexed, shifting my gaze to her. âThat makes no sense when you make triple the amount from a single modeling gig.â
âI havenât had as many jobs lately. This opportunity came up, and since you guys already know me from photographing the bandâs collection, I took it!â
âDoes everyone know about this already?â
"I thought I only owed explanations to you."
"I'm not a solo artist, and changes need to go through everyone in the band first!" I tried to moderate my tone as I turned back to the dashboard.
"Well, my hiring was cleared by Gerard, and now you're being informed about it. I donât think anyone else is left on my list." She concluded with conviction after adjusting the rearview mirror to see her own reflection.
The girl lowered her sunglasses and started the car, keeping a moderate speed and playing some generic pop music that scratched at my ears.
I was about to open the door and throw myself onto the road at any moment.
At home, I barely had time to sit and breathe before being bombarded with calls and messages about being late to the airport. Moving at the slow pace I was still processing things, I threw a few pieces of clothing into a backpack and called a taxi to meet up with the band as quickly as possible.
"Hey, man! How are you feeling?" Folio greeted me at the entrance with a light slap on my arm.
"I'm fine," I replied, forcing some enthusiasm into my voice as I followed him. "You seem excited to travel."
"And when am I not?" he said as if it were obvious, raising his hands in the air. "I thought we were all eager to get back on stage after some time."
"You're right..." I felt like I couldnât say the same. "I am, too."
In the boarding line, I bit the inside of my lips as soon as her perfume arrived first in the air, infecting everything in the blink of an eye as if it wanted to suffocate me. From the corner of my eye, I saw her stop behind me, wearing sunglasses and focused on a piece of paper she was holding, her long black-painted nails adorned with rings she rarely took off.
"What are you doing here?" I heard her voice and turned to see she was speaking to Scarlet, who had taken a spot behind her.
"Didn't Noah tell you?" the red-haired girl replied with raised eyebrows. "I'll be accompanying the band as a photographer."
"No, Noah didnât tell us..." She smiled slowly and turned to look straight at me. Every word she spoke to Scarlet didnât require the slightest eye contactâshe directed her harsh words while fixing me with a furious glare. "I didnât know he was hiring just anyone to keep his girlfriend around."
"What are you talking about?" I asked, lowering my voice as if each word pierced my brain, my headache still relentless.
"Listen here, girl, you respect me because I am not just anyone!"
She laughed, covering her mouth with trembling fingers before recomposing herself and gliding her lipstick-coated lips together.
"Thank you so much for the info, sweetheart! Good luck keeping an eye on him backstage."
Like a furious storm, she delivered her acidic words while brushing past me, heading toward our friends up ahead.
"I find her so rude," Scarlet muttered with a dissatisfied grunt. "No wonder if she's high, acting so full of herself."
"Why donât you just shut up?" I snapped, cutting her words short with a cold sideways glare. "If you found a way to insert yourself into the band through work, then do it. Pretend the rumors about my personality are trueâdonât talk to me, donât sit next to me, donât ask me for anything, and definitely donât meddle in my life. I sincerely hope I donât have to hear your voice until the plane lands, or Iâll ship you off to an island in New Zealand."
"But Noahâ"
Before Scarlet could say anything else, I turned my back on her and followed the rest of the team. Fortunately, I was so exhausted that the rest of the trip seemed to promise immediate sleep.
On the plane, however, my mood worsened even more when I realized Iâd been assigned the worst seat possible: right behind Ruffilo and the others, who were laughing loudly and joking incessantly with her.
Ruffiloâs loud laugh cut through the air, and something inside me pulsed with growing irritation.
"Could you all keep it down?" I snapped, sharp enough to silence them. "Iâm trying to sleep."
"Sorry, Noah..." Ruffilo apologized, pulling an exaggerated pout. "We were just trying to distract her."
I rolled my eyes. "Her fear of flying will only ease if you let her sit by the window. Acting like clowns wonât help. Now stop bothering me."
An awkward silence settled momentarily, soon replaced by careful movement in the aisle. She swapped seats, taking the one by the window. The light filtering through the clouds bathed her face with a softness that, against my will, held my attention for a few seconds longer than it should have.
Her expression was tense, her brow furrowed, almost in agony over something as she looked outside, her delicate fingers tapping quickly against the seatâs side. Her scent lingered in the airâsubtle, but impossible to ignore.
I caught myself inhaling deeply, without realizing it, before quickly averting my gaze and leaning my head against the headrest, trying to ignore the silent chaos she caused in me.
The landing was turbulent, both literally and emotionally, as I still struggled to fall asleep. The uncomfortable silence during the remainder of the flight was replaced by the teamâs bustle during disembarkation, everyone busy gathering their belongings. I, on the other hand, kept my distance from Scarlet, even when she was just a few steps behind me.
We arrived at the hotel, unfortunately crowded with other teams and bands participating in the festival. The marble lobby reflected the golden light of the chandelier, creating an environment that felt suffocating after such an exhausting day.
Ruffilo led the small line at the reception desk, collecting room keys and handing them out. Everything seemed to be going smoothly until Scarlet cleared her throat loudly, drawing everyoneâs attention.
"And my room?" Scarlet asked, crossing her arms, visibly annoyed.
Ruffilo hesitated, glancing at the receptionist before turning back to her. "You⌠didnât book a room?"
She rolled her eyes. "I thought someone on the team would do that for me."
My patience, already frayed, was about to snap. "And no one thought to tell you that you needed to handle it yourself?"
"Donât start, Noah," she shot back, her cheeks tinged slightly pink but her tone sharp. "I can stay in your room."
The suggestionâor rather, demandâmade my head turn in her direction so fast I felt tension in my neck. "Absolutely not," I replied, my voice firm as contained thunder.
Scarlet raised an eyebrow, defiant. "Oh, what's the problem? I'm not asking for much."
"It's not happening," I emphasized, gesturing toward the group. "Why don't you share a room with the only other woman here?"
The suggestion was logical but caused a pause in the room. Scarlet looked at me as if I had just gravely insulted her, while the girl chewing gum and inspecting her nails smirked faintly, almost imperceptibly.
"Great idea," she said with false cheerfulness, a lightness that contrasted with the tension in the air. "I don't mind sharing a room with you, Redhead."
Scarlet turned to her, clearly indignant. "You must be joking."
"She's not," I interrupted, more firmly than I intended. "Problem solved."
Scarlet huffed, shooting a final look of displeasure before grabbing her things. I watched her walk away, the sound of her footsteps echoing on the marble as she reluctantly departed.
"Did I mention how much I love your grouchy old-man spirit today?" Ruffilo commented under his breath, barely holding back a laugh. "It's rarely this entertaining."
"I just want to figure out what the hell that girl is doing," I muttered, cutting off the joke as I grabbed my key and headed for the elevator.
"Replacing Bryan, right?"
"That's what it seemsâŚ"
But I had a feeling Scarlet's presence was more than just coincidence.
After settling into my room, an uneasiness began to consume me. The hotel was too dull, and the day's tension lingered in my head like an endless echo. I decided to head out in search of something to eatâanything to get me out of that oppressive atmosphere.
I called a taxi, and as I waited at the entrance, the cold night air brought momentary relief. As soon as the car arrived, I opened the door and got in, giving the driver an address I vaguely remembered seeing in a travel magazine. Before the taxi could leave, the opposite door suddenly opened, and a familiar figure climbed in without hesitation.
"Of course," I muttered, already exasperated as she settled in beside me with a mischievous smile.
"How lucky for me," she said, feigning enthusiasm. "Sharing a taxi with the devil himself."
"Seriously? Can't you take another one?" I asked, already considering opening the door and getting out.
"I'm already here; there's no way I'm letting a ride pass by," she retorted, fixing her hair as if that would end the argument. âBesides, Iâm looking for a place to eat. What a coincidence, huh? Hey, where's Scarlet?"
"Perfect," I muttered sarcastically, leaning back against the seat and looking out the window, trying to ignore her.
The ride was silentâon my part, at least. She seemed quite pleased to tease me with remarks about the city, the driver, and even how I always seemed grumpy.
When we finally arrived at the address, I got out quickly, eager to rid myself of her. But, unsurprisingly, she followed right behind me, the sound of her boots echoing on the sidewalk.
"Why are you getting out?" I asked, turning to face her.
"Because I decided to eat at the same place as you," she replied with a challenging smile.
I rolled my eyes and started walking, but soon noticed something strange. The address I had chosen⌠didn't seem right. There was no restaurant in sight, just old buildings and poorly lit streets.
"Are you sure this is the place?" she asked, glancing around with raised eyebrows.
"Of course I am," I lied, though the discomfort was evident in my voice.
"Oh, then where's the restaurant, genius?" She crossed her arms, tilting her head at me with a look of fake patience.
"Maybe it's around the corner," I replied, pointing randomly and starting to walk, even though I wasnât certain.
"Or maybe you just have no idea what you're doing," she quipped, following me.
"You didnât have to come," I shot back, spinning on my heel to face her.
"And you didnât have to get us lost," she countered with a shrug.
The argument escalated quickly. Our voices echoed through the deserted streets as we argued about whose fault it wasâmine, for choosing an address without checking, or hers, for insisting on tagging along.
"You think you know everything, don't you?" she exclaimed, shaking her head.
"And you think you have the right to meddle in everything," I retorted, pointing at her.
She opened her mouth to reply but was interrupted by a distant soundâsomething metallic, like a gate slamming shut. We both fell silent immediately, the atmosphere now much quieter and stranger than before.
"Great," she muttered, glancing around again. "Now we're lost on an empty street and probably about to get mugged."
"If youâd stop complaining for a second, maybe we could find the place," I replied, trying to ignore the growing unease inside me.
But deep down, I knew she was right. The night was only getting worse.
The sky began to shift slowly, the bluish tones giving way to a deep orange that soon turned into an oppressive darkness. What once looked like deserted streets now carried an unsettling aura. The buildings and sidewalks disappeared, replaced by empty lots and sparse trees. The silence was broken only by the sound of our footsteps, which seemed louder with every second.
"Whatâs the matter, Noah? Afraid of the dark?" she teased, wiggling her fingers, though her voice trembled slightly, betraying her growing discomfort.
"Stop being pathetic!" I snapped, forcing sarcasm to mask the anxiety creeping over me.
The real trouble came when my phone vibrated one last time before dying completely.
"Perfect," I muttered, holding the lifeless device in my hand.
She glanced at her own phone and made a face, letting out a dry laugh. "Mineâs almost dead too. Weâre out of GPS, no taxi, and no idea where we are."
"Oh, so youâre just now realizing this was a terrible idea?"
"You brought me here!" she shot back, arms crossed like she owned the moral high ground.
The argument continued as we walked, but the energy was draining along with the daylight. The jokes and taunts gave way to irritated grumbles and, eventually, to an uncomfortable silence. The cold began to set in, making her rub her arms and mutter something about how much of a waste of time this all was.
That was when we spotted a structure in the distance, partially hidden by the trees.
âIs that a house?â she asked, her voice tinged with doubt.
âSort of,â I replied, eyeing the weathered, timeworn structure. It was small, with cracked walls and windows boarded up with planks.
It looked like it had been abandoned for years, but at least it offered shelter.
âI canât believe Iâm going in there,â I said, taking a step back.
âGreat. Stay out here and see how much you like the freezing wind,â she shot back before pushing open the slightly ajar door.
The inside was no more inviting than the outside. The wooden floor creaked with every step, and the smell of mildew and dust filled my lungs. There were only two rooms: one that seemed to be the main living area and another that might have been a bedroom. Unlike me, she was enthralled, poking around at everything from the walls to the furniture and even amusing herself by sniffing the abandoned food in the fridge.
I hated how she could turn any situation into a joke.
âDo you think itâs safe?â I asked, following her hesitantly.
âNo idea. But itâs better than staying outside.â
I scoffed, glancing around with disdain.
âSo, what now? Are we setting up camp here and waiting for sunrise?â
âMaybe. Did you bring a tent? Because thereâs only one bed, and Iâm not sleeping with you, Mr. I-Snore-All-Night.â
âFunny,â I said mockingly, throwing a dusty pillow at her. âI donât snore anymore.â
The tension between us kept building, every word dripping with irritation and exhaustion. My heart was pounding harderânot just because of the situation, but because of her presence, so close yet so infuriating.
âI feel like you planned this just to get some alone time with me!â she accused, her eyes gleaming with anger. âAt the very least, I expected a less exotic location.â
âDisappearing your body behind this house at sunrise is still an option.â
âI definitely deserve more than being dumped in the middle of nowhere!â she declared haughtily.
âI canât believe I have to spend the night under the same roof as you! Iâd have preferred being mugged outside.â
âThen go back out there, Superman!â
Our bickering echoed off the empty walls, the anger making the discomfort almost palpable. Yet, in the midst of our insults, a sound from outside cut through the tension.
A low rustling, like leaves being stepped on.
We both fell silent immediately, our eyes darting toward the open door. The air grew heavier, and for the first time since we left the hotel, I felt something close to genuine fear.
âDid you hear that?â she whispered, her voice finally stripped of sarcasm.
âYes,â I replied, my gaze fixed on the darkness outside.
Something was out there.
And, for the first time that night, our argument ceased to matter.
â @collisionofyourkissmakesitsohard ; @iluvmewwwww75 ; @anarchydomainglory ; @foliosgirl ; @lacy1986 ; @chey-h ; @supersquirrel1996 ; @zozalineâ ; @just-randomm-stuff
#lost in control fic#noah sebastian#bad omens band#bad omens fanfiction#fan fiction#bad omens fic#fanfic#noah sebastian davies#noah sebastian fan fiction#noah sebastian fanfic#noah sebastian smut#noah sebastian fic#noah sebastian fanfiction#noah sebastian bad omens#noah sebastian x reader#noah sebastian davis#bad omens fanfic#bad omens fan fic#smut fan fiction#fanfic writing#fan fic writing#smut#fic#one bed trope#bad omens#Spotify
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Definitely Not Adorable Behavior
based on a reel i saw on instagram lol. changed the narrative a bit to fit the characters.
Stiles' eyes track Merlin's, towards the corner of the massive ballroom, where two men are standing with their hands crossed against their chest. Their side-profile are almost identical: crisp, tailored black suits, accentuating their biceps, broad shoulders, and tantalizingly shaped body figures. Even their heights seem to be the same; the only notable difference from this angle is the color of their hair: a dark, deep, raven onyx versus a golden halo.
"They're arguing about something."
"Yes," Merlin sips his drink, the one he's claimed several times into the evening to be a disgusting piece of beverage, and winces. "I don't know why I keep drinking it."
"That's because Arthur brought it for you," Stiles tells him with a knowing smile. "And you won't deny him the pleasure of serving you, no matter how awful the taste might be."
Merlin looks at the gaudy, unneeded, and entirely unnecessary piece of diamond ring that Derek gifted him for this evening. It's almost the same size as his engagement ring, and it sits prettily enough on his left hand's pointer finger. Merlin catches his eye with a gentle smile on his own face.
"Arthur and I share something special," he begins, voice lilting into the foreign accent Stiles hasn't been able to place yet. It sounds like Welsh, but different than the one he knows. Older. "For a long time I thought my devotion to him wouldn't be reciprocated, and it was fine. I was fine with it. But as always, the clotpole had other ideas." Clotpole. What the hell does that even mean? Merlin's chuckle brings him back to what he is saying, "âtold him, and so, now Arthur thinks he must make it up to me."
"Or he just loves you very, very much, but has awful taste."
"That, too."
They'd turned towards each other for the conversation, the din of the hall loud enough to keep it private from prying ears, but now they turn. Someone just gasped, and they're both most definitely into drama from the sidelines.
"Oh my god."
"Are theyâ ARTHUR!"
"DEREK SEBASTIAN HALE!"
Both men freeze. The old lady who gasped turns to look at them, as does the rest of the room, but Stiles isn't paying them any heed, and neither is Merlin. No. Their focus is entirely on their idiots.
Arthur's left hand is fisted at Derek's tie, and his right hand is frozen near his waist, crooked fingers looking for purchase. Weirdly, Stiles likens this action with looking for a sword in its scabbard, tightened securely near hips.
On the flip side, Derek's got his right hand centimeters from Arthur's nose, while his left one must be aiming to intercept Arthur's sword-hand or whatever.
And their faces. Oh Jesus Christ, their faces.
Red with anger. Mouths open in a feral cry of war. And eyes? Stuck on Stiles and Merlin, fear melting their rage.
Both him and Merlin stride towards them, Merlin's glass of questionably purple drink handed to one of the catering staff, and it's as if their movement reminds Arthur and Derek that they're caught. They jump apart, though they do share a look of commiserating grief over being caught.
Bastards. United against spousal anger.
Merlin and him don't say anything in this hall with interested ears and human eyes and multitudes of equipment ready to immortalize this scene; they simply take their respective husband's hands in their own and drag them out towards the parking lot, which happens to be mostly empty. Still, they go in deeper towards a secluded corner.
Once there, Stiles stares their Derek down, hands back at his sides. Merlin does the same.
"So? Care to elaborate what the fuck that was about?" His question is met nervous breathing and another commiserating look. "Oh, so now you're both buddy-buddy, but inside the hall you two were â what, enemies?" He snorts. He can't help it; Derek and him have faced literal monsters, and yet Derek was about to fight a posh, young man for... some reason?
Before either of them can speak, Merlin narrows his eyes. "Wait. Was this a ruse?"
"A ruse? What do you mean, Merlin?"
"Your royal pratness, by that I mean a very elaborate scheme to leave that dull place with questionable drinks andâ"
Arthur's face goes from confused to dull. "Did you not like the Favor?"
"Favor?" Merlin question's, and Stiles shoots Derek a look to shush. Why the hell is he finding this so funny?
"That's what the drink was called. And it was purple. It wasn't nice? So I..." Arthur's gaze turns wide. "And you still drank it all! I even brought you a second glass of it, why didn't you tell me you didn't like it?"
Merlin rubs the back of his neck, a sheepish gesture. When no answers seem forthcoming from him, Stiles steps in.
"It was thoughtful, I guess, since I'm gonna assume purple and that name means something to you both?" They nod in assent. "Right. See, thoughtful gifts are nice... but not always. Like, maybe you like it, but Merlin wouldn't. And it's not a bad thing at all, you just need to communicate."
Merlin rolls his eyes. "Says the man who hates the diamond ring gifted to him."
Stiles hisses, "Hey!" at the same time Derek asks, voice small, "Stiles?"
He turns towards his husband, moves closer. "Hey, it's nice. It's a very good gift."
Arthur says, weirdly with glee, "Which you don't like!"
"I love the thought behind it though!"
"But you don't like it," Derek repeats, eyes on Stiles', daring him to lie again.
Stiles cups his face, rubs his thumb against his stubble. "No," he admits. "I don't."
"I think we have gone a bit off-track here," Merlin says, after a while. Stiles turns to see the other couple in a similar position: in an almost-embrace, an intimate moment shared. "Why were you two at each other's throats?"
A third look is shared between Derek and Arthur. Then, Derek says, "It was about what that lady asked us."
"Yeah."
Merlin and Stiles wait for further elaboration, one which doesn't come. Now they share a look, and take a step to move away from their respective embraces. That, apparently, does the trick, and Arthur continues from his monosyllable answer, neither of the men letting Merlin or Stiles leave their personal space in the process.
"She asked us, 'What's the most expensive thing you've ever eaten?' and we told her. We disagreed at each other's answer, though."
"This was done over a trivial question? Derek. What the hell."
"I wonder how bigger your head can grow, Arthur. Really?"
Derek leans in close to him and tells him, in almost his Alpha voice, "My answer was you."
Stiles blinks. Huh? "Huh?" And then, "Oh my godâ"
"And I said you," Arthur adds. "Of course, my Merlin is more expensive than your husband."
"I said this, and I'll say this again: Stiles is literally wearing the most expensive set of clothes right now on this side of the coast, he's wearing two diaomond rings, and that's just today's outfit."
Both Derek and Arthur push him and Merlin behind them, and move closer to each other, gearing up for a fight. Again.
"Unappreciated gifts don't count, and my husband is wearing a neckerchief made of the most pure gold, and that's just one of them!"
Stiles and Merlin look at each other.
"I had no idea this suit was that fucking expensive," he tells the man, who is eyeing up his own neckerchief in betrayal.
"You said this was just the color gold!"
"Merlin, we're leaving. Let's go."
"Yes. They can duke it out between themselves, while we enjoy this evening with people who tell us the truth."
They turn around, and start walking back towards the ballroom. Behind them, the fight never occurs. Instead, pounding footsteps follow them, and really, this evening did not go how Stiles had envisioned it to be.
(Lydia tells them a week later that "Derek Hale and Arthur Emrys begging their partners for forgiveness in the charity gala" is still a solid opening hit for a conversation, and Merlin rolls his eyes before his eyes glow gold and his favorite chips appear in his hand.
Because apparently, they're the Merlin and Arthur: Magic itself, and the Once and Future King.
Stiles' own eyes glow a deep purple, and both him and Lydia now have their favorite drinks in their hands.
Meanwhile, Derek's authority and Arthur's ego clash over something else equally trivial in the kitchen. Hopefully their bickering won't get in the way of dinner.
If it does... oh well. A Spark and The Sorcerer can cook something, can't they?
And no, both him and Merlin have decided that in no way, shape, or form, are they telling their husbands that the fact that their arguments occur mostly over being the 'better husband' is adorable. Nope, never, ever.)
#derek hale#stiles stilinski#arthur pendragon#merlin#bbc merlin#sterek#merthur#merthur fics#sterek fics#*sterekficrecs#*merthurficrecs#crossover!#sh.writing#sh.writesonmain
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To me, the fault for that lies in two things: first, doctors and hospitals making sure their jobs are highly profitable. Not just a livable wage, but enough to pay off their debts AND have enough money left after to be considered relatively rich. If not for that, healthcare would be much cheaper. And second, investors valuing the money they get from the company rather than the good the company does with their investment. If it's not profitable, the company will crash and people will either be forced to go to a company that does the same or worse, or be forced to pay for it themselves. This is not a black and white "the company is being evil" situation. There are so many reasons insurance companies have to deny claims. It's just not feasible to accept them all. And the fact this particular company doesn't even make that high of a profit makes it clear they can't accept more than they do without going under. I'm not saying denying claims is morally right, but they have to operate like a business or insurance won't exist. There aren't any other options unless you can convince doctors their profession shouldn't be a high-paying job.
Elect people into government positions that will do something. Push for change via stopping the tribalistic bullshit and actually voting for who has the best policies. The only reason Congress won't do anything is cuz we've shown them they can give us shit representatives and we'll take them because they're part of "our team."
Quite frankly, I'm sick of people complaining about politicians, yet every time it's time to elect representatives, be it the president or a congressman or a judge or a governor or whatever, it's always "vote for this guy, he's blue/red." Our politicians being shit is an issue WE created. Every time there's a chance to elect someone better we fall back on tribalistic nonsense.
I get it, we want fast results, and murder seems like the fastest result there is, but it isn't going to turn out how you want it to. History has shown what happens when we decide murder is the way to effect change. It always, ALWAYS, results in something either just as bad or worse than what we wanted to get rid of.
I agree that Luigi isnât a hero but we do need to do something about these CEOâs that screw over customers or that are so crazy woke. Thankfully Disney got rid of bob chapek but bob Iger needs to get back to pre covid policies and how tickets parks dining plans and hotels were setup
Oh for sure there's a lot of crap that's pulled by CEO's and they take advantage of people and do very condemnable things and they absolutely need to be held accountable for some of the shit they pull but murder isn't the answer.
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I really hope they put max and charles together at the press conference in Hungary and ask charles about the rumors of him on red bull
i can imagine them joking about being teammates đ
#imagine max mentioning the incident#i pay whatever it takes to make this happen !!#they in the same couch đŤŁ#they talking about being teammates#charles leclerc#max verstappen#formula 1#f1#lestappen#press conference#hungary gp
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so many expenses this month and most of it isnt even for me :(
#i hate that my family thinks i have lots of money even though my brother made a lot more than me#mom keeps telling me my brother might need it in the future so she refuse to ask him any#really shows that they do not respect me at all about this#and the worst thing is its always very sudden#a cold 5 min call where mom tell me âpay for this now! dont postpone itâ and the payment is almost 1K#and my stupid ass cant even say no because if i say no they will make me feel guilty and then i feel like i wanna kms and end up paying anw#god#parents are gonna go on vacation soon#watch they'll be calling me soon to give them more money#and then go hom from there#and not bringing me any gift as usual#why should they care about the faggy child that failed to achieve his parents assigned goals#if anything putting all family expenses on me will quicken my death or worse force me to go back to them#so they can hold me and mold me back into what they want#i know their plan and i refuse to follow it#but they probably just need to shout on me once and i'll follow whatever their ask.. sad#i want to recoup by taking commissions but last time this happened and i took too many comms it ended up taking more than a month#i dont think i can handle that much anymore#AAAAAAAAA im tired
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I have Got to get more transgender
#100% ŃокŃĐľŃĐ˝ŃĐš дновник ĐťĐľĐ˛Ń ĐРЧĐТĐĐ#transmasc#trans ftm#transgender#i like 2 say i'm very trans already but unforch i am Not Really. mostly boring ftm Guy Ever#so tempted to cut my hair again but my sense of what i look like is already so fuzzy i dont think it'd help..#want to dye my hair anyways. at this point i'd take whatever color i can get if not purple LOL#it's almost everything i could want and yet ... still me. still the same life. stuck.#soooo high functioning like you wouldnt believe EXCEPT istg i need an emotional support human who will guide me through tasks#such as 'pay with your Moneys Card at the Store'#or... idk that's it really. maybe go grocery shopping without feeling like i'm not meant to be there also#or like. exist in general maybe#reasons why not emotional support Animal: creature cannot understand capitalism. and also is not as necessary as a service dog specifically#idk! every time i come on here i fall apart (in text) and then pull myself back together for another day of ... this i guess.#i'm not even having like crying breakdowns or anything to go along with it i'm just held inside this shell of a body. typing away again#i'm soso tempted to make things worse. progress wouldn't matter anymore... at least maybe it would feel real that i'm like this#i wish my face fit on my body right. and also that i did not look quite so much like a vaguely gnc lesbian#like at LEAST let me look butch as hell but no. curse of sad hair & uncertainty#miss my little mullety thing from that brief period in october... miss my short hair from back in 2017 ...#just dont feel satisfied with what i am now. in general.#top surgery is literally Within my reach but i'm not sure about cost and i need to wait because of doing guard now......#my list of do i want t i kept for the past month turned out to be a bunch of maybes#partially cause i got sick. partially cause it stopped being shark week and i forgot about it#as always happens...#still unsure in my new(er) name. only heard it once#didn't feel the same way as with my old one? but idk. just don't know.#missing guard also but feeling conflicted about not having time for other hobbies...#since winter season is over i've had so much time to play guitar! that's insane! mostly cause i stopped playing for unrelated reasons...#just tired again. wonder if i need more sleep than what i always get. kind of restless.#there's nothing else to say i guess. just wish i could be a person the way everyone else seems to be.
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Should make a pain killer that actually kills (or even touches) pain
#not that I have access to ultra hardcore stuff#but even when I had... pretty sure it was vicodine for my wisdom teeth; it didn't do a thing for me#cbd based stuff seems like it maybe helps; certainly does more than nsaids which do nothing for pain (great for inflammation though)#but I just... I'd really like something that actually makes my muscles and joints feel like... good; unpain#I'm sure it would be classified as addictive whatever it was but like... fuck man... I just want to not hurt#I can't tell if I have chronic pain cause... I kinda forget to pay attention when I'm hurting a lot of the time#I'll just... kinda realize I've been hurting bad all day and just not really focusing on it#and I also don't know how often it happens; if it's once a day or once a month or what; not great at noting that stuff down#but man... I don't even like most meds; so many meds either do nothing for me or make me feel like shit#like... benedril? however you spell it; someone gave me some once said it would help me sleep... help me be awake feeling like ass more lik#but like... love to see if muscle relaxants actually like... relaxed my muscles; but you get it; you get why I'll never be able to try it#though honestly I think therapeutic massage might help me a lot#but my doc says that really only gets authorized by physical therapy and... well for me physical therapy is useless#cause I forget to do the exercise; like it's me failing a physical therapy; not a probably with physical therapy#if I ever think I can keep up with it I'd love to try physical therapy for my back again; but I don't want to waste all my chances at it#not when... I descriptively didn't do it when I was in it before; I'd never remember to do any of the exercises#anyway; bonus story from when I was in urgent care when the infection came back (that's still never been solved)#I tell the doc 'last time it tore open a drainage hole it was the worst pain I've ever felt'... cause it was#I said 'I'll need something a bit stronger than an nsaid cause the nsaid did nothing but cut inflammation last time'#she's like 'don't worry; I got you'... wanna guess what she gave me? a newer nsaid#it didn't do shit; I was just lucky and it wasn't as painful... maybe the old drainage hole tore open easier this time#but I didn't even take the nsaid she prescribed; so I'm gonna say it wasn't that med helping#like I get it; you don't want to give opioids... and would it shock you to know that wasn't what I was looking for either#there's gotta be something between nsaid and fentynol man#...well... maybe the cdb has almost got my muscles... hurting less at least; only taken all this time I've been writing#they still hurt for sure... I don't know... get tired; you know?#mm tag so i can find things later
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I love how my unintentional excuse as to why Alestair and Idan never have to go to work is because they ran away and basically quit without notice.
#this has always been a part of the story though as the first ever thing I wrote with Alestair involved what happened#but Idan stops working there because of that#Mara's job pays a LOT and is hire based so she can do whatever#Vilissa is like the only character that has to regularly work LMAO#but also Vi wouldn't let Alestair get a job when they were dating#as for Fae she's a sex worker so she does it whenever#Fritz and Jer are employed but they don't even get heavily involved in helping until Love and that is explained away (thanks Vi)#as for other stoires#the children in Sunshine are too young to work#the parents do work and leave regularly but aren't really heavily involved#and the adults just take care of themselves with the stuff they have or work if they want (like Norie)#there is no currently running school in the castle (but there used to be)#Barle is a con artist so he would sell junk he fixed up but after getting kidnapped by Shika he doesn't really worry about that anymore#Shika and Fria have disposable income as they are just looking for Barle (Shika the princess and Fria a royal bodyguard)#and Charlie is a bounty hunter so he has freelance (and later a courier)#Flick and Millie are child and Nick is jobless and he's a bird currently so he just needs to eat a little#Ebers is a fortune teller so she does that whenever#also since Millie doesn't care about school she skips out after Flick shows up#And Flick is basically kidnapped so she doesn't got to school as she can't even go there#Seth is homeless and gets things out of making deals with others which he sometimes sell expensive items to get money#Lia and Giles leave behind their lives to adventure but were previously self employed (small businesses)#Myrtle is a Princess so she has that responsibility and disposable income#Sylas is a hunter but there isn't really any work to be done if most of the kingdom is under a sleeping spell#Nym uses the stuff that Elysa left behind in death but he was a Farmer back home not that he can get back home#Pokey runs the train station and the venue but he also isn't getting a lot of business from the inner kingdom#that's just the main stories lolll#every story has some kinda excuse about not working while the story happens
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i feel weird even claiming my family used to be considered "rich" bc a lot of yall immediately jump to having summer homes, 20 yachts, and enough money to save a country
#not gonna act like we weren't well off... ofc we were but like.... we werent on THAT level nearly at all#more of a country club... goes on a lot of vacations.... has a decently sized house with a pool... kinda rich#which is still rich dont get me wrong but i promise i wasnt living like fucking. kim kardashian or whatever ok#we didnt have a fuckin walk-in-fridge or 20 unused empty rooms#i say this bc ppl end up surprised when i tell them im not anymore like 'how' well its a lot of things like the housing market crash#my parents getting a divorce my dad being the one with the job that my moms dad gave to him that was making him all the money#and my grandpa passed not long after i was born so when they split up we were just going off of whatever he left really for a while#had to move etc etc.... now im low income and rely on food stamps and ssi âď¸ but thats mostly bc im disabled so#kinda necessarily low income bc the govt only wants to pay the very bare minimum that they can.#its also- not my money! i dont get to decide what happens to it and i dont get to decide i get nice things or whatever. that all hinges#on if my mom or gma wants to.#so technically even if you wanted to consider them rich still- its not part of me atp bc its not even my money and im an adult#whos not legally dependent on them anymore. i think it only counts if its *your* actual money or if your parent is okay with dishing#out like a 1000 dollars a month like its nothing. completely unfazed by giving it to you.#its not rich if its conditional ok like... children of rich parents arent rich and i will die on this hill. why do you think so many of the#end up fucked up? not only is it bc they've had ppl basically doing everything for them their whole life so they dont know how to take#care of themselves they're also entirely dependent on the parent for money. when you feel controlled like that- even if your parent isnt#necessarily abusive about it- just the fact everything you do hinges on the approval of your parent- kinda fucks you up and makes#you feel like you're stuck being a forever child. not great for people who probably want to go out in the world and date to feel#like you cant escape being dependent on your parents
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okay sorry for having opinions on sonic shipping but . the more popular a ship is the more likely i am to be annoyed by it so its probably for the best that my favorite ship is one of the not as popular ones . but also the way sonknux gets talked about (or not talked about) as a result of it being less popular drives me up the wall . what do you mean it doesnt make sense. hes literally not staring at the moon and thinking about himđ
#theyre literally the sun and the moon and you dont even CARE ....#okay but ive actually seen random sonknux posts get a bunch of comments from so/nadow and kn/uxouge fans#along the lines of ''umm i prefer so/nadow :/'' or ''this doesnt make any sense so/nadow is better'' or ''nooo knuckles likes rouge''#like ohhhh my godddd shut UP#anyway theres so many things that sonic and knuckles have done that if it was sonic and amy or knuckles and rouge#or sonic and shadow doing it instead it would get labelled as peak romance#i know this to be true because it literally already happens sonic and knuckles do something gay and its cricket noises#then sonic and shadow do the same thing later. sometimes in the same show/comic/whatever . and it gets reposted everywhere . what#hell none of the other pairings i mentinoed even have to do what sonic and knuckles do they just have to stand near eachother#and people start freaking out ...#also im not saying youre legally obligated to like sonknux too if you like so/nadow or that you cant prefer so/nadow#but. if you think so/nadow makes perfect sense and have convinced yourself that its basically canon and every interaction between them#is a hint from sega that theyre secretly dating or something and you make the biggest reaches imaginable to prove it#while also thinking that sonknux doesnt make any sense at all and labelling it as a crackship or whatever#i can only assume that you arent paying attention to anything that happens in knuckles centric stuff#and/or being That obsessed with so/nadow has just heavily warped your perception of things. because how#and its not even just so/nadow .. knu/xouge is constantly overshadowing sonknux too#but at least so/nadow is actually okay its only crime is being too popular and having some annoying fans as a result#knu/xouge on the other hand is too popular and has a lot of annoying fans AND sucks . which is worse#but so/nadow is one i find myself comparing it to more often because its another gay pairing#and also people are obsessed with taking stuff from sonic and knuckles' relationship/interactions and giving it to sonic and shadow instead#and acting like knuckles doesnt exist and stuff that sonic and knuckles did first is exclusive to sonic and shadow or something#whatever . runs away
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its so embarassing likee. going to talk abt a feeling you have but you already know ppl will be like Oh that sounds like depression lol and its like. well yes . i know . trust me i am so aware i am depressed . but its still like a thing ive been thinking abt and wanting to talk abt but ik itll just be like Ok hun đ. idk idk what response i would want tho ig FNFNFNF
#not anything serious i was just thinking how like. idk. this is gonna sound rly stupid#but for me personally like. sometimes. How do i phrase this without sounding rly evil#i think obv ppl can spend their money however they want but like. its kind of hard 4 me to grasp sometimes like. there r things that ppl#spend a lot of money on bc it makes them happy like umm. vacations or pets or hobbies or whathaveyou. and obviously thats fine but#i iust feel like its all so. temporary and like. idk. idt im ohrasing this right at all i just likee. the thought of working all year to#afford to take a vacation and then working again to afford another vacation just makes me feel like i want to die. like. idk... i like#vacations we dont need to go on them a lot but ig its just like. everything we do just feels like a waste of time. not in like a Ohh you#should be doing more work Obviously its just like. idk. maybe it is just me. but i feel like im just waiting until i die and can be done#with it i guess. and everything i do is just to fill time until that happens. yk ? which is silly bc of my whole. Thing i cant talk abt#but ppl talk abt like. going out and partying or going on vacation or whatever and i like. I like those things its nice when they happen#but they dont rly make me longterm any happier i guess. everything just feels like another thing im doing. idk. this rly isnt coming out the#way it is in my head. and Again i know this is just depression shit or whatever im just like. its all exhausting. it just makes me feel so#tired. to think abt working and working and working so i can pay to be alive and i can save to do one fun thing every so often to keep me#sane enough to keep working and working and working and i probably wont ever be able to retire itll just be. work. and then ill die. yk.#but i feel like the vacations and stuff dont like. refresh me very much. maybe its just bc ive only been on one 'vacation' as an adult and#it was just like. coming home to see my family. and realizing id have to move back home yk..#+ like. my mom nd my gran taking me out for a weekend when i lived up there#nd those things were nice and all but once its over its like. it doesnt fuel me to keep going it doesnt make me feel any better abt having#to work for the rest of my life#ik im being ridiculous bc im literally unemployed and i cant even get up off my ass to get my stupid fucking ged so i can get a job and be#Useful to my family its just like. idk.... i try so hard to be like Oh nothing mayters and thats why everything matters type thing like. Yes#all things end and the point is to just try to be happy until it does#but i feel like it just doesnt happen for me. i feel like any happiness i feel is so insanely like. it happens and then its gone. and its#back to just. the knowledge that im still fucking stuck here. and i will be until it happens. yk. i play video games tomoass the time until#i go back to sleep then i wake up and i make a spreadsheet to pass the time until i go back to sleep#and everyday just feels like passing the time until i go back to sleep and itll just keep going until it happens. and its nice to have nice#days but whats like. the point. yk. everything just ends#IDK. this is all very whiny im sry. ive just been feeling it a lot lately . i hope this doesnt feel like me being like Ohhh you ppl r so#dumb participating in hobbies and going out and having fun dont you know yr gonna DIE? thats not what im trying to be like#its just like. i feel like it doesnt make me as happy as it does other ppl like. none of it refreshes me or makes me want to keep going
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ive got these (cishet) coworkers who've been dating since July but they're not telling our boss and idrc abt that part - i just think the lengths they go to to keep it hidden is so funny considering they're SO blatantly obvious about coming in/leaving together on a daily basis
#they âhappenâ to get here and leave w/in 5-10 min Every Single Day#they take lunch at the same time and are both gone for almost the same time frame every time#im not even paying that much attention our lab is just really small (6 ppl total including our boss) so it's pretty obvious đ#like whatever works for them ultimately it just makes me giggle a little#(they're also very cute together don't take this as me hating them together its just funny to me cause i happened to leave at the same time#as the one who sits next to me today and we parted ways at the elevators but when i walked out he was helping her up off the sidewalk. she#'left' 15ish min b4 him today btw)#(this also isnt an unhealthy work environment they're not Scared they just dont wanna say anything to our boss since its still newer)
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