#i only blog 4 my own entertainment as you can tell

[labryveinth]

HELLO TUMBLR!!! LONG TIME NO SEE ... sowwy 4 not posting. been up 2 some MISCHIEF!!! anyway. this is my first oc post EVR.... his name is ethernet! he's an epic sans-turned-error variant.... :3 this is his official ref!!! me & my friend (@tearcynical) created an ask blog 4 ethernet & 4 his oc, crosswise, since they both play important roles in each other's stories. there, i'll reveal more about him as a character!!! the ask blog is named @wirenet (still a wip however...)

for now, you can have a short summary of his personality ( that is quite old but nonetheless... still an ok summary... ) — since an epic without whimsiness isn’t an actual epic, ethernet continues to be just as dorky as his original self, only to a certain extent. due to the multiple malfunctions and distortions of his code, his personality underwent a dramatic transformation. the once patient and calm demeanor he displayed gave way to a volatile and explosive temperament as if he were a time bomb ready to go off at any moment. years of depravation and sleepless nights have contributed to his short-fuse and paranoia, as even the smallest of irritations could ignite his anger, sending him into a tirade. and if you don’t play into his games or entertain him in any way ��� you may as well dig your own grave. as for his role, from an outsider's perspective, ethernet is considered a digital "destroyer", a threat to the multiverse. however, if you were to ask ethernet himself - he would not identify with any of these terms. due to the destructive nature of his abilities (and his fucked up code), he ends up destroying most things he touches. him "destroying" aus is him desperately searching for a part of himself that he's lost. his ultimate goal!! the reason why he's even touching other aus in the first place. what that "part of himself" is??? I'M NOT TELLING YOU!!! I'M LEAVING YOU ON A CLIFFHANGER!!! (until next episode) his main ability is his cables. it has two uses. first is "extraction", which allows him to extract information from any au by ripping an orifice in the fabric of the timeline & plugging his cables in (praying this made sense). the consequence of this ability is that, upon finishing extraction, the au becomes distorted (and on most occasions, self destructs). the second, replication, allows ethernet to copy an au’s extracted code and temporarily apply it to his own before it malfunctions. here is an example of how extraction would look like.... </3 vvv

here is what (half of) his skeleton looks like ! scandalous, i knoiw... :/

AND FINALLY.... HERE ARE SOME DOODLES I MADE OF CROSSWIRE & ETHERNET. they r canonically doomed yaoi crepic. their ship name is called wirenet how cool is that.!

CROSSWIRE BELONGS TO TEARCYNICAL!!! ok sorry 4 the massive art dump & yap. goodbye,.....

[lilbeanblogsabit]

Babysit A Bean 2024 - The Rules

Tumblr Interaction:

Diaper checks! …I might regret this… but diaper checks! From 11/29 to 12/4, I will be answering diaper checks to the best of my ability!  So get 'em out of your system because I won’t do this a ton.  But I figure I’ll need someone to tell me when to change.  

Polls, Polls, and More Polls.  Things like “What diaper should I wear” to “What should I have for dinner” and everything in between.

Lots of updates… some of them more entertaining than others I’d imagine.

Personal: 

Bean must enforce his own bedtimes and mornings.  If he doesn’t get at least 6 hours of sleep a night he gets 1 punishment point per offense, and must take an afternoon nap the day after.  

Bean must eat at least 1 meal a day.  That meal has to be okayed by me or he will earn 1 punishment point.  If he doesn’t have 1 pre-approved meal he will also earn a punishment point.  If Bean only eats a meal that is NOT pre-approved by me, he will earn 2 punishment points.  

Beanie will follow his normal drinking regiment.  Failure to do so is 1 punishment point per offense

Beanie has to send a picture of his playroom to me every night before bed, showing that it is tidy and well kept.  Failure to do so is 1 punishment point per offense

Bean is NOT allowed to sleep in my bed while I am gone.  He will sleep in his playroom.  Failure to do so is 1 punishment point per offense

Beanie is expected to keep up with his daily chores and house upkeep.  Daily FaceTime calls will confirm this.  Failure to do so is 1 punishment point. 

Beanie will put all professional responsibilities above the kinky ones.  Failure to do so is 1 punishment point per offense.

Kinky:

Beanie will be padded 24/7, either in Diapers or Pull ups.  If he puts on big boy undies, 3 punishment points per offense.

Beanie will carry a diaper bag wherever he goes.  It can be left in his car, but he is expected to change whenever he needs to, either in a bathroom or in his car.  Failure to do so is 1 punishment point per offense. 

Bean will not be allowed to enter the house from an outing that's over an hour, until he has peed at least once.  Failure to do so is 1 punishment point per offense.

Beanie is expected to keep up with his training so he must do the following. Failure to do any of these is 1 punishment point. 

Wear a plug for at least 2 hours a day

Practice his oral skills on his other cock (...that's what Daddy calls my dildo)

Spend at least 30 minutes a day with Hannah, or her stuffie replacement. 

Beanie will NOT be locked in chastity, unless it is determined he can’t be trusted.  Beanie will be allowed to make cummies, but only if someone tells him he can.  Cumming without permission is an automatic punishment. 

Tasks and Punishments:

Beanie will complete Daddy’s daily task without hesitation by 7:00pm.  If Beanie does not complete a task fully, He earns 3 punishment points.  If Beanie does’t even attempt the task, it will be an automatic punishment.

All Tasks will be confirmed complete by Daddy.

If Beanie earns 5 punishment points, he will be punished, and must complete it within 24 hours. Failure to do so will result in 3 punishment points.

After the punishment is complete, 5 points are subtracted.

All punishments will be created and dished out by the wonderful @polkadotpuddles since she loves a chance to make me suffer!

…you guys won’t know them until she dishes one out… but trust me they are WAY worse than the tasks Daddy gave me… 

@polkadotpuddles can give punishment points if she thinks Bean is being overly bratty or ornery.

Misc Rules:

All rules are flexible and can be bent if needed.  This is meant to be fun! Not meant to drive Bean insane.  

All tasks and Punishments will need photo/video proof.  Proof will be published on Bean’s blog.  If it is too blushy, proof will be submitted to Daddy and he will verify. 

Link to Main Post: *Click Here*

Link to Daily Tasks: *Click Here*

[brotrustmeicanwrite]

I fucking hate AI but heavens would it be useful if it wasn't such an unethical shit show

First, just to be clear, I'm talking about actually using AI as a tool to support your writing process, not to generate soulless texts made from stolen data instead of writing yourself.

Back when ChatGPT first became available it was still pretty useless so I had a lot of time to learn about how it's made, how it works and the ethics of it before ever touching the technology. I decided pretty quickly to never use it to generate text (or images) for actual writing and art but I still wanted to experiment with what else it could do (because I'm a nosy bitch that needs to know and poke everything).

And HEAVENS was it a blessing for writing with adhd

The last time I wrote more than 200 words in a day (outside of school work obviously) was 7th grade. I wrote over 8k just in notes the day Google's "Gemini" (formerly "Bard") became available to the public.

In order to not jeopardize my existing work I decided to make a completely new story with Bard's help that wasn't linked in any way to anything I had made before. So I started with a prompt along the lines of "I need help writing a story". At first, it immediately started generating a completely random story about a green tiger but after some trial and error, I got it to instead start asking questions.

What do you want the theme of your story to be?

What genre do you want to write in?

What time period do you want your story to take place in?

Is there magic?

Are there other sentient creatures besides humans?

And so on and so forth. Until the questions became extremely specific after covering all the bases. I could tell that all I was doing was essentially talking to an amalgamation of every "how to write" blog and website you've ever seen and telling it which part I wanted to work on next but it still felt great because the AI didn't actually contribute anything besides a few suggestions of common tropes and themes here and some synonyms and related words there; I was doing all the work.

And that's the point.

Nothing in that exchange was something I couldn't easily do on my own. But what happened was that I had turned what is usually a chaotic mess of a railway network of thoughts into a clear and most importantly recorded conversation. I can sit down and answer all those questions on my own but what usually happens when I do, is that every thought I have branches out into 4-7 new ones which I then attempt to record all at once (which obviously doesn't work, yay adhd) only to end up lost in thought with maybe 20 lines of notes in total after 6 hours at the table. Alternatively, either because I get bored or just because, I get distracted by something or my own thoughts about a different unrelated topic and end up with even less.

Working within the boundaries of a conversation forces you to focus on one specific question at a time and answer it to progress. And the engagement from the back and forth is just enough entertainment to not get bored. The six hours I mentioned before is the time I spent chatting with what is essentially a glorified chatbot that day, way less time than what I spent on any other project, and yet I have more notes and a clearer image of the story than I do about any of my real work. I have a recorded train of thought.

In theory, this would also work with a real human in a real conversation but realistically only very few people have someone who would be willing to do that; I certainly don't have a someone like that. Not to mention that someone doesn't always have time. Besides that, a real human conversation involves two minds with their own ideas, both of which are trying to contribute their own thoughts and opinions equally. The type of AI chat that I experimented with, on the other hand, is essentially just the conversation you have with yourself when answering those questions, only with part of it outsourced to a computer and no one else butting into your train of thought.

On that note, I also tried to get it to critique my writing but besides fixing grammatical errors all that thing did was sing praises as if I was God. That's where you'll 100000% need humans.

tl;dr writing with AI as an assistant has basically the same effect as body doubling but it’s an unethical shit show so I’m not doing it again. Also I forgot to mention I did repeat the experiment for accuracy with different amount of spoons and it makes me extra bitter that is was very consistent

[just-another-fanfiction-writer]

Could you handle me? | Sebastian Sallow x fem!Reader | Chapter One

Word count: 1.1k

Summary: Sebastian is always flirting with you and up in your personal space. So you decide to finally let him taste his own medicine.

Warnings: aged up characters, pining, tension (will likely lead to smut in a following chapter), minors dni

~ chapter two ~ chapter three ~ ao3 link ~

Welcome back to my blog!

This marks the end of my 4-year hiatus and I'm really excited. I think I learned a lot since then and hope I can entertain some people with a few HL fanfics.

Stay tuned for more ❤️️

~Mia

Suddenly he moved closer...a lot closer. His arm resting against his cocked hip, his chest almost brushing your bicep. It sent shivers down your spine, but luckily he wouldn't be able to distinguish them from your other shivers caused by this cold evening.

Yet you couldn't help yourself from looking down to the messily tucked in shirt, up his vest buttons, over this deliciously exposed neck and to stop at his teasing smile and dark brown eyes. You raised an eyebrow at Sebastian, crossing your arms (more to lessen your involuntary shivers, whenever his chest touched you) and asked him, what exactly he thought of doing.

His damn perfect smile widened at this question, eyes growing darker.

"I'm flirting, isn't it obvious?"

You couldn't stop yourself from blushing a little, hoping he didn't see it before you turned your face away from him. This feeling...jumping around in your heart like a giddy child...you had to push it away, so inadvertently your crossed arms nudged him enough, so he had to change his position again. Finally there was some distance between you two again. 

Thank Merlin.

"Well, you should stop that. We don't want anyone to think of us otherwise, do we?"

You tried to cover your shaky voice with a playful tone, yet you weren’t sure if it was believable.

When you looked back up into his warm eyes, you wondered…was it a shimmer of sadness in his eyes just now? You couldn't tell for sure, as his smile came back again so quickly. 

Obviously he just wanted to get a rise out of you again. Always teasing, always flirting, always too god damn close. 

He was your friend, your best one to be exact, but oh, how you longed for more. This…flirting…it was the only thing you could allow yourself.

"I don't care what anyone thinks about us.” He answered in a hushed and dark voice. “I only care what you think."

He was standing there so confidently, while you could only notice your knees getting weaker with each second he was staring at you, waiting for a reaction.

Maybe you could allow yourself a little more.

Just a tiny bit more.

Maybe it would shut him up for good.

When you turned to face him completely and mirrored the darkness in his eyes, his ones widened. You didn't notice how his knees also got a little weaker and how his hands started to shake with anticipation, when you stepped closer.

"Oh, so you wouldn't care..." 

You stepped closer. 

"...if anyone saw us..." 

Another step. 

"...being so close and..." 

Another. 

"...personal?"

Now you were close enough for Sebastian to notice the faded scar on your temple, the small small discoloration in one of your eyes and smell this wonderful perfume of yours mixed with your own intoxicating scent.

He had to gulp down against the lump in his throat he suddenly felt.

"No..." His voice was low and raspy, a little shaky even. 

Oh this was perfect. Just perfect.

Finally you would get a little revenge for him always making you feel like you would lose your mind, whenever he stepped into your personal space so recklessly.

A wave of confidence rushed through your veins from seeing him like this. Seeing how his freckled nose flared up with his quickening breath, his cheeks turning an adorable pink and his lips quivering a little.

The gasp that escaped those lips, when you put your hand on his hip to pull him closer, shot right down your body, right in between your legs. You wanted to get used to this feeling. You wanted to just let go and drown in this exciting promise of his gasp.

You had to hear it again.

"Oh, I don't think you'd be able to handle it. To handle me."

Sebastian was barely able to hold back a muttered "Fuck", showing just how desperate he was for you. How much your hand sent tingles up and down his spine and how your dark voice awakened something so even darker inside him.

He bit his lower lip, watching you very intently.

Though his eyes shortly closed with the new sensation of your other hand running up his arm, over his muscular bicep and shoulder, stopping at his neck.

Oh, and when you pulled him down by it, almost fully closing the distance between your lips, he again let a gasp escape his mouth.

This was too fucking addicting.

Your stomach wanted to turn upside down, your legs wanted to give out and your lips...they wanted to kiss him and show him how much you needed him.

Your fingers gently ran up his soft curly brown hair, twisting it a little and scraping his scalp. He seemed to enjoy the feeling, closing his eyes once more, but quickly opening them again, to stare down at your lips.

You neither noticed your other hand drawing small circles on his lower back nor your breasts pressing against his taut chest. Your mind was already dizzy, running a marathon in your head, which your heart apparently took part in, hammering so hard and fast that you could only hear your own pulse in your ears.

Yet the moment your lips ghosted over his plush ones, everything stopped.

As if your whole body just shut down.

It felt like forever until your body turned back on, but it must've been less than a millisecond, when something similar to a siren started to blare a warning in your head.

THIS IS YOUR BEST FRIEND!

Everything inside you started to initiate the plan for Code Red.

You pulled back, stepping away from Sebastian completely, your hands falling down from the desperate grip they just had on him, while your heart ached like a thousand needles were attacking it.

Your eyes darted everywhere except to the brunette, only allowing you to look at him once, to see his reaction to your sudden retreat. Seeing his big wide eyes, you knew you had to cover up whatever just spilled out of your heart. You couldn't let your unusual abrasive behavior destroy this friendship.

So you just giggled half-heartedly, trying to cover all of this up as your usual non-serious flirting. 

"See? Couldn't handle me..."

Your voice wasn't very convincing, but you chose to ignore it as best as you could.

"Now come on, Sallow, you dumbass. We should be getting back to the castle."

Nice save there, you thought to yourself, rolling your eyes. Sebastian couldn't see it, as you already turned away, making your way towards the castle.

[absolutebl]

Given the wide range of BL you've consumed and analyzed. I am curious at your perspective when comparing BLs made/written by men and those that were written by women, in a different direction, comparing BLs directed by men in comparison to women.

If you could have the time and give your perspective in this two sources of BL , that would be great.

Hum, I'm not sure how to answer this. Except in a kind of avoidance way because I question the premise.

I think, in general, in most of the film industry, the original writing has very little to do with the final result, because so many new voices and povs are imposed on it the moment it begins to be adapted. After a BL leaves its author (predominantly female) it goes to script, a writers room, and eventually into the hands of director and team. All those people are different genders (predominantly male). And all of them have a significant impact on the end result.

Sometimes the author has unprecedented influence (mame for example) but that's pretty unusual.

Statistically speaking, the origin IP (whether novel or graphic) is most likely written by a female and the resulting BL most likely directed by a male.

There are always exceptions, of course.

Even putting aside all the other people, mostly script writers, in between the two primaries (which I just don't think you can) it would be statistically challenging to draw any commonalities amongst female directors (since there are so few) or amongst male writers (for the same reason). In other words, we have many many examples of really only 1 of the 4 possible combinations, and all those examples are muddied by the nature of the filming process (not to mention the nature of gender).

In other words, it would be challenging for me to say things are generally preferable in any one version of the pairings.

I have liked BLs written and directed by women, written by a woman directed by a man, written by a man directed by a woman, or written and directed by men (although those last two I would struggle to name any BLs).

However, I have also liked and then disliked BLs from the same general team and combination of genders behind the creatives.

For me, at least, there doesn't seem to be a reliable team or a reliable writer or a reliable director whose BL product I will reliably love.

I would hesitate to place a predictor on my BL taste (or anyone else's) based on the gender of any part of the team behind a BL. That seems..... weird. Especially when queers and 3rd gender etc are involved (and we have always been involved in artistic spaces for as long as humans have existed, I suspect).

But then I feel that way about most entertainment, from music to books to plays to comedy to fashion. I can be a fan of a director's style but not like some of their shows, just as I can be a fan of an actor's performance but not the character they're playing, or a fan of a pair's chemistry but not in those roles, and so forth.

I think what youth and influencers and the internet age has forgotten is that it's okay to admire a creative individual and not slavishly adore everything that they produce. (For fuck's sake though, don't tell them that, you absolute troll.)

Creatives and creative teams also have their own taste, and that may conflict with yours. Especially with newer IP where you might want the same old same old and they need to evolved. Consumers of entertainment are remarkably resistant to creativity, innovation, and change (so oxymoronic) .

It's okay, maybe you'll like their next BL, song, book, painting, performance......

I have no idea how I got here but:

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

I do have some stuff on a queer lens here:

[communicationthroughlyrics]

Master List

18+, Men and Minors DNI- Do not repost works without permission!

WLW, Celebrity Fan-fiction. Heavy use of song lyrics for themes and storylines, and I don't like to write short fics. This is my first fanfic blog in a long time- I appreciate reading everyones comments on my work! Focused on Scarlett Johannson and her characters, Elizabeth Olsen, AJ Cook, Blake Lively, etc.

Bonus points to those who can guess all the lyrics being used :]

Series: I Like Your Blood On My Teeth Just A Little Too Much (ScarJo)

HIATUS

You’re a former military, career oriented security executive who has made quite the living for yourself- but it has always been lacking. Your non-committal attitude has led you down a playgirl lifestyle, never really settling. What happens when your new boss throws you a curveball, and as a result? You end up hopelessly involved with a Hollywood starlet. (Warnings: Smut, Strong Language, Violence, Stalking, Death Threats, Implied Abuse/Sexual Abuse, Flashbacks to War/PTSD)

*More warnings will be added as I write*

Ch. 1 - Are You at One, or do You Lie?

Ch. 2 - We’re Hiding Like a Shadow in the Dark

Ch. 3 - All This Money and This Pain Got Me Heartless

Ch. 4 - Fuck Around and Damn Near Die in it

Ch. 5 - You Pulled Me Under Just to Save Yourself

Ch. 6 - You Blame Me for Everything You Hate

Ch. 7 - Fall Down Before Me, I Want You on Your Knees 

Ch. 8 - The Weight That’s Crushing can be Relieved

Ch. 9 - I Have a Growing Fear and You’re Not Helping Me

Ch. 10 -  I Pulled Off Your Wings, Then I Laughed

Ch. 11 - Army Green Was No Safe Bet

Ch. 12 - Whisper on a Scream, Doesn't Change a Thing

Ch. 13 - Digging Up the Dirt, You Get to Meet All Sorts

Ch. 14 - I Just Want You to Know Who I Am

Ch. 15 - The Only Thing You Brought Is Psychological Warfare

Ch. 16 - You're Gonna Get What's Coming to You

Ch. 17 - A Pebble in the Water Makes a Ripple Effect

Ch. 18 - If You Wade Around Forever, You Will Surely Drown

Ch. 19 - I'll Be Hurtin' When I Wake Up On The Floor

View the Story Board for this pic HERE

______________________________________________________________

Series: I Work Too Hard, Can You Fuckin' Pay Me? (Wanda Maximoff)

ONGOING

Y/N moved to escape some of thier looming troubles from Westview, to the place that their best friend said would make a difference. New job, new digs, will Y/N make a change for the better, or leave another city with their tail between their legs? (Warnings: Smut, Strong Language, Cheating, Intersex!Reader, Alcohol Abuse, Angst)

- PT. 1 - PT.2 - PT.3 - PT.4 - PT.5 - PT.6 - PT.7 - PT.8 -

______________________________________________________________

One Shots, Drabbles and Stuff

😈= smut 🥰= fluff 😰= angst

S.J. - You Hold Your Hands in the Air, Screaming My Name 😈

S.J. - So Fucked Up, From the Way That You Touch - Pt. 1. Pt. 2. 😈

E.O. - Our Fire When We're Together, Mixed With Paranoid Manners🥰

N.R. - I Got a Secret, So I'ma Drop ‘Em to the Floor 🎄😈

W.M. - Easy to Love 🥰

J.J. - It's Time to Let Her Know What You Need - Pt. 1 Pt.2 😈

N.R. - Let's Talk About Chemistry😈

J.J. - Caught Between Black and White 😰

W.M. - I Just Wanna be Yours 😈

N.R. - There's No Hope In Endless Winter 😰

N.R. - Ancient Sun, Cast Your Light (Pt. 2 to There's No Hope In Endless Winter) 😰😈🥰

W.M./N.R - I Gambled On Red And The Price Was Paid 😈

W.M./N.R - Fuck Me Like You Mean It (Pt. 2 to I Gambled On Red)😈🥰

S.J. - You Should Probably Leave 🥰😈😰

N.R. - I Can't Help The Way I'm Feelin' Pt. 1 Pt.2 😈

E.O. - Watch The World Explode From Underneath Your Glow 😈

W.M. - She Had Other Plans

W.M. - Tell Me Your Limit and We'll Cross the Line Again (Pt. 2 to She Had Other Plans)😈

W.M./N.R. - Come With Us And You Will See ⚰️😈

J.J. - Black and Blue

*credit for images/lyrics used on this blog belong to respective owners, i do not own these images/songs. contents of this blog are purely for creative entertainment purposes, any similarities between those portrayed in this blog and real people are purely coincidental. all works on this blog are fiction. works are my own, do not copy, plagiarize, or steal.*

[gallifreyianrosearkytiorsusan]

Roots

Author's notes: Zaarius in Husbandry

Past =-= Next

Warnings: Let me know if I need to add anything.

Summary: Zaarius, happy from collecting the items from his Loyalist clients, the intel, and other resources that they paid in response for his Delights. Now, he just needs to trade with Hura so that he gets stuff from him.

Tagged: @barn-anon, @bleedingichorhearts, @c-u-c-koo-4-40k, @egrets-not-regrets, @kit-williams,

Tagged continued: @sleepyfan-blog, @whorety-k, @ms--lobotomy @bispecsual @thevoidscreams

Tagged continued: @i-am-a-dragon34, @gra93fruit-blog

Zaarius hums to himself pleased at how much he’d received from his Loyalist clients making sure to carefully put his trade goods in carefully protective crates with his name stamped on them. He knows that will only have some of those within the Base hesitate briefly before rifling through his stuff for their own benefit.

Now- he’s got an Apothecary to trade with, he’s heard the complaints from some of the Apothecaries about how stingy the Loyalists are with sharing supplies in certain kinds of medications and other sorts of supplies that they need. Some of those supplies are growing ever lesser, and thus more valuable to trade for.

Which has him grin sharply, and has those who are smart, avoiding him, while also watching him carefully for his Shenanigans. He pushes the crate on a rolling cart, it’s annoying that they don’t have any anti-gravitation hover carts, which are a much more elegant way to move things.

“Hura, dear cousin!” Zaarius calls out with a churring trill in his voice. “I am glad that we were able to have time to discuss something with each other.”

He’d requested some of Hura’s time, knowing that the other is very busy being a higher ranking Apothecary who’s really good at his job and isn’t an entirely sadistic piece of work, which can be a trend among the Renegade, and more particularly, the Chaos Apothecary Space Marines.

Hura inclines his head as he looks down at his smaller fellow Chaos Marine, Zaarius could be quite the entertaining fellow. So long as he wasn’t in a Spiteful mood, Hura gestures for Zaarius to follow after him.

“My office is just down the way,” Hura says, looking at the crate filled with something. ”What’s that you have there?”

“Supplies I traded some Loyalists for,” Zaarius says with a grin, his six sets of eyes squinting a little as he gives out a bit of a pleased trill. “That is why I wanted to meet with you Hura, is some of the supplies I gathered, I figured you would be interested, what with some of the supply issues that the Medicae of Chaos have been having due to that little squabble that you lot have been having recently.”

“Just what kinds of supplies did you acquire?” Hura asks, “and how did you acquire them?”

“I acquired them through honest, legal trade with some Loyalists who are interested in my particular services that I can personally do,” Zaarius says honestly, “how they acquired the goods is not my care to know.”

Hura looks at him steadily, for a few hearts beat, slowly taking in what the other has said and looks at the crate again before looking at Zaarius, “What kind of medical supplies did you legally acquire?”

 Zaarius grins up at him and with one of his extra arms he carefully lifts up the crate and grabs out some of the medical supplies, a sample of each of the medications that they are starting to sorely lack that the Loyalists have a decent supply of.

“A little of this, a little of that,” Zaarius replies as he hands over the samples, so that Hura can test the quality of the supplies for himself. “Please tell me if the quality is off so I can discuss with my suppliers the foolishness of their actions, please Hura?”

If they aren’t of the quality that he’d requested, then he’s going to ensure that those Loyalist clients of his will be properly punished for their hubris and foolishness for trying to short their Dealer of their rightful due.

Hura takes the samples, and uses part of his assessor array to test the quality of the medicines, which are what they are labeled to be as of the high quality that can be made on ancient terra with the limited supplies and technology that they have available.

He informs Zaarius of such, he seems most pleased with the answer, he knows that this crate of supplies is not going to be given to him, or to the Medicae at the base, but is something he’s going to trade for something he needs or wants instead. 

Such is the way of Chaos, even in these unprecedented times, so long as supplies are hoarded too much and theft is kept at a minimum those in charge are willing to look the other way, because trying to fight over petty stuff will leave them at a serious disadvantage with the Loyalists and Renegades. 

Not to mention the factions within the baseline humans that could also take advantage of such disharmony. So Hura negotiates with Zaarius for the supplies, discussing with him the details of the trade, and doing his best to not have to give the other too much.

Hura manages to get a good deal out of Zaarius, but reminding the other that he lives on this Base as well, and how they do need to maintain a professional relationship with one another.

Also, that he or one of his fellow Death  Guard Apothecaries are going to be the ones to do his next health assessment. And then he gives the other one of his pleasant smiles. Zarius’s main eyes stare at him and narrow slightly, while the other sets of eyes dart around a little as he thinks over his next response.

Zaarius decides to make the smart decision and not try to be too greedy with his request with only some minor Slanneshi Space Marine dramatics. Which mildly amuses and annoys Hura at the same time. 

Zaarius gives half of the supplies, waiting on the recompense for the trade that he just made with Hura. Following after the other and humming one of those stupid Ancient Terran human songs that are so annoyingly catchy.

Hura gets the requested trade supplies and he makes sure to double count them as he watches Hura take the supplies that he’d gotten in trade with the Loyalists. Pleased that Hura hadn’t tried to short him  he takes the supplies and plans where he’s going to keep the supplies and not have them stolen from him by some bastard either a wanderer or a resident of the base.

[saintmeghanmarkle]

My Journey With Meghan and the Narcissist in My Life by u/HumawormDoc

My Journey With Meghan and the Narcissist in My Life I have never in my life hated a "celebrity". I don't really pay them any mind - to me "celebrities" are just the theater kids who made it big and I don't need their opinions on politics, morals or home life. HOWEVER, I loathe Meghan Markle and I have since her engagement interview. She was so familiar to me because our family has a narcissist that is exactly like Meghan. Amber Heard is a narcissist too but was a bit different than ours. Meghan's type of narcissism and our family member's type of narcissism line up almost exactly - the symptoms are the same - much like symptoms of the flu are the same for people across the board.The symptoms include: 1. horrible parenting 2. love bombing her husband then treating him like dirt 3. cutting off her husband from his family and friends 4. using sex to get what she wants 5. is the "main character" in every situation (the bride at every wedding and the corpse at every funeral) 6. extreme lying and getting mad when people call her out or don't believe her lies 7. she can't be trusted with any sensitive information - granted, ours does not have an international stage, but she has facebook and a cell phone and will blast any "secrets" so everyone has learned not to tell her anything important 8. the mask slips 9. the extreme bullying 10. the using and discarding of family and friends. 11. The inappropriate outfits for ALL occasions. 12. professional victimEvery time I see Harry with holey shoes while she sports a $2,000 outfit, I'm like YEP! Our narc dresses to the nines and her husband looks like a hobo and HE'S the one with all the money.The rictus grin is REAL - ours has one too and yes, it is very unsettling.The mask slips are terrifying to see in real life too - they go from grinning to the devil in .5 seconds.As a family we are basically NO CONTACT but, we all have to prepare when we have to interact with her. We go over "the list". We DO NOT tell her any sensitive information (pregnancies, illnesses, engagements, break-ups, etc.) - we just nod our heads when she is spouting bullshit - we just nod our heads when she tells us how perfect and wonderful she is and how perfect and wonderful her life is - we do not react when she talks ugly about other family members or her "friends". We just hold it all in until we are no longer in her presence - then we can all relax and laugh about her for a day or two.So seeing Meghan on an international stage spouting her bullshit and seeing her narcissism on full display for the entire world to see has been sort of a healing process for us. It's been like an affirmation of what our family has been through. Granted, we are not the Royal Family, but betrayal, lies and manipulation hurt any family! Now when people ask why we don't see our narc too much, we can simply reply "she is exactly like Meghan Markle" and then the usual reaction is "OOOOOOHHHHHHH!!!! No wonder y'all don't see her much. I don't blame you."I have been on this sub for years and it's because I could not find anyone else (at the time) who hated Meghan like I did. I could see her for exactly who and what she was because we have one too. The world is waking up and there will drama surrounding her forever. Worse things will be coming - I'm sure of that. Narcissists NEVER stop. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk. post link: https://ift.tt/hnXzuwN author: HumawormDoc submitted: October 12, 2024 at 02:35PM via SaintMeghanMarkle on Reddit disclaimer: all views + opinions expressed by the author of this post, as well as any comments and reblogs, are solely the author's own; they do not necessarily reflect the views of the administrator of this Tumblr blog. For entertainment only.

[chaand-jalne-laga]

CJL LIVE BLOG SEASON 1 [EPISODE 1]

So. I know, this is wrong. Coz I put the IPK one on hold and now i am starting another, but I thought, this one is just for 82 epis(SO SHORT? WTF? CHALA HI NAHI SHOW?!?!?) So, it wont take much time to complete this and I also wanted to keep this content and ipk content separate. Hence, a separate blog. I know y'all might be hard-core Arshi fans and ipk fans, but, give this one, a chance, as well, ok? Just for entertainment's sake? Please? Baaki, it's your choice ofc :) Hope you enjoy this.

1.) Hmm. Pune. Maharashtra. A girl peeping out through the car window. Enjoying the 'jaadu' in the air. Btw, I like the BG score, here.

2.) In the flashback, we see two kids sitting on a white horse and the horse is galloping in its full galore. The girl confirms the magic in the air as her hands are flying. Lol. Typical kids.

3.) Tara di's sister is asking about her opinion on her looks. IDK but I cringed real hard when she said, "Achi lag rahi hun naa?"(Like yeah darling, you look average. Lol. JK. You look stunning but stop with that cringe acting, ok?)

4.) Tara Di opens her hair and A SECOND-LITERALLY A SECOND AGO, she was irritated but then immediately she is impressed with her di's improvisation. Whatever. Lol.

5.) Selfies. Di is excited so she starts taking selfies and her younger sister is suspicious instantly. Why? Does she not take selfies on any normal day? Maybe. *shrugs*

6.) How typical of people to instantly assume that if a girl seems excited then she might be having a 'chakkar' with some boy. Why girl? Your sister can't be happy for her own self, just like that, without any reason? *hmph* Do you make her that upset? Lol. That now her excitement seems abnormal.

7.) NGL but this Tara di's sister is a really bad actor, whoever she is. Sorry. Lol.

8.) Tara Di gets off the car and lets them drive by. Then, she quickly runs to the Bus Station to catch a bus for--?--whatever.

A Side Gyaan : But that's such a bad way to catch a bus, actually. First, you catch the attention of the bus driver coz they are at a considerable height and then they stop the vehicle ONLY THEN you cross it and get on the bus, okay? My readers? Don't be like Tara Didi, okay? Good. Now, we come back to the epi.

9.) So. Tara didi is changing her shoes. I really thought for a sec that she will change her outfit too. Lol. A kid is staring at her antiques and she notices people are staring at her. So.

What do you think will she do?

a) ignore them

b) make faces at them

c) sunaoify (rudely) them for staring at a slightly differently dressed girl

d) give them a five page ka gyaan on social etiquettes as a soon-to-be 'Starplus Bahu'

Yeah. You are neither right nor wrong, coz she will randomly pull out a jar of lollipops and distribute it to appease them. Yes. We all do that. We all step out of our homes, thinking we might happen to be in a bus and can then distribute it among the children on the said bus. Whatever.

10.) TD gets off the bus and buys chana and gur for--?--*shrugs*

11.) TD is now sitting in a-tempo?-transport vehicle. Whatever. Driver announces her destination which is- "Sehgal Estate"

12.) The driver assuming her to be a tourist, warns her, of the place having been shut down for quite a few years now and he tells her that an accident had taken place, many years ago. TD flashes back to that 'haadsa' and politely dismisses him by stating that she is a local.

13.) Ok, ladies, so all things aside, who all can climb up and cross that gate, that high, with a WHITE SAREE and that too without staining it!?!? Anyone? No? See, our Tara D (Lol. I have so many name ideas for this girl.) CAN. She is a champion at this. (Okay so i wanted to take a screenshot of that long-ass gate but Jio Cinema didn't let me. Fudge you, Ambanis'. Whatever. Lol.)

14.) She takes help from Deva's flash back advice when he had first guided her to climb that (same?) gate. Okay, so that saxophone BG score is cute, okay? Lol.

15.) Gosh. How did they manage to find a small girl who looks exactly like Kanika Mann? Wow. Casting directors take a bow. *bows down with joined hands*

16.) Okay, so the titular song has started in the BG and I am loving it. Meanwhile, TD is going about the mansion and recalling that 'haadsa'.

17.) I am actually kinda liking this kid, Deva. How sweet of him. He extends a bunch of yellow flowers (symbolizing friendship). And damn, he has one hell of a head full of soft and flowy tresses. Wow. Any hair care tips for us, girls, Deva? Lol. Whatever.

18.) She digs out the 'nishaani' of their friendship which is basically two thick stones(or rocks?) joining like a puzzle piece and 'Badshah' along with caricatures of Deva and Tara, carved on the two pieces.

19.) She becomes very emotional, holding the symbol of a once very beautiful bond she had with some boy named- Deva. And then out of the blue we hear a horse neighing and Tara instantly brightens as she recognizes Badshah.

20.) Sure enough, we see Badshah running towards Tara and Tara on reaching close to it, touches it affectionately on it's jaws. We see that Badshah is indeed angry and disappointed on Tara. He starts running away as Tara tries to pacify it(him?). Oh. So. The chana and gur was for a horse. Ok. Nice.

Fun-Fact : All things set aside, Kanika genuinely had to interact with a horse in the middle of the shoot. I wonder if there's some story to this episode which she might have, like she was hell scared of horses and yet had to learn how to interact even if it's a well trained horse, we are talking about. Okay. Enough. Now back to the epi.

21.) Basant Kaka has come to see Tara Bitiya. What's with that line?-"Main janta tha ki aaj ka din tu bhulegi naayi, zarur aayegi." Kya hai aaj ke din mein aisa? Tara's demeanor changes as she recalls the incidents that took place in today's date.

22.) She tells BK that today is the day she met HIM (Deva?) and she reveals that he was the only one who made her Tara from 'Phus Tara' (Deflated Star or according to Jio Cinema's caption-'Timid Tara'. Basically an insulting nick name.)

(Lol. See. I got another name. But. Sorry i won't use that coz it triggers her childhood trauma.)

22.) Do I see vengeance there, Tara? Okay. So, we are being taken 15 years back.

23.) Wow. What an a__hole of a brother. He is chasing Tara all over the house with a bunch of crackers (chataai?) Tara is hidden inside the cupboard but she wants to come out because she is scared of darkness and it's all dark inside the cupboard. Ronak bhaiya fools her to come out but lays the chataai bomb and lights it with a matchstick giving her a 'Sehgal Promise'. These Sehgals seem to be too stuck up of a family tho.

Not-So-Fun Fact : God, these are the worst kind of crackers not only coz of the sound but also they keep scattering everywhere, while bursting, once lit. Even I am hell scared of these and always stand at least 1 Km away from these. Lol.

24.) Not knowing better (how would she? she is just a kid of 7-8 something.) Tara trusts her wicked brother, who has already run away to the veneration, steps out of the cupboard but it's too late the crackers keep scattering everywhere and bursting in the meantime and the poor kid is hell scared she starts calling out for her father ("Baba").

25.) Baba is doing aarti of Devi Maiyya (Oh. Hello DM. How are you? How are Khushi-Arnav and their munchkins doing? Lol. Sorry. I get carried away a bit.)

26.) WAIT. WHAT!?!!?!?! Is that the same guy, who was in Sheesh Mahal, on the fashion show night and Khushi came, asked him for directions but instead got to listen to an Urdu Shayari? Wow. See. A crossover we didn't deserve but got anyway. Whatever.

27.) Baba was doing aarti when his hell scared daughter comes and merely touches his back and the veneration plate skips away from his hand. Lol. What kind of a diet Baba takes that he couldn't even handle a gentle push from a mere kid of 7? Whatever.

But the thing that surprises me more is that he is about to lash out at her in front of the whole-family?- bunch of people. This is where I thought that there's some major tiff going on, in the family, like, everyone is against a mere kid.

28.) Baba, your daughter was hell scared, that too, coz of your a__hole of a son. A lil bit of compassion would go a long way. Thank you.

29.) Wow. A__hole father, a__hole brother. Tara. Run. I said. RUN. Whatever. Poor kid. Is getting blamed for the thing that she couldn't have any control of. So. Baba's wife died at childbirth. So. Now. He has got a lifetime license of blaming and punishing his daughter for it. WoW. jUsT. wOw.

30.) Some one please call a gynecologist and enlighten him that it hardly has anything to do with the child but has everything to do with proper timely medical care. Whatever.

31.) OH. She is crying in front her mother's portrait. Asking if she would ever be loved by anyone or not. I so desperately want to go and give her a looooooong jaadu ki jhappi. Uff. I am getting goosebumps now.

32.) She hears a melody being played out from a harmonica and is instantly drawn to its source. She sees, a boy riding a horse named Badshah and carrying balloons on it's saddle. She is kind of intrigued by this boy.

33.) The boy introduces himself as Deva and in the process, mocks Ronak. Ronak is kind of irritated of this boy already and tries to take over the horse and orders BK to light a long-ass chataai (do they have nothing else in the name of crackers? Lol. 'sEhGaLs') But, Deva is frantic and warns not to burst crackers as it will make Badshah go crazy and mocks him again and Ronak pushes him and Deva falls down.

34.) BK, following his master's orders, lights the chataai and Badshah goes crazy, starts running around violently. There is chaos everywhere, somewhere in the midst, Baba also shouts. The horse Badshah is now running towards Tara and Tara is frightened to the core. She freezes at her spot and covers her face ready to face the impact. Deva pulls off a high jump stunt and lands on the horse's back and calms him down in the process.

35.) Deva tries to cheer Tara up and is successful and from there on they both spend time together and thus become hard core friends.

36.) Deva lightens up her world. She smiles more, laughs more, conquers her fears a lil bit more, every time she is with Deva. And one fine day, they both are celebrating Deva's birthday and Tara has brought a cake for him. A candle is perched on its top. Deva lights it up and blows it away to make a wish. But the candle keeps lighting up again and again automatically, this surprises Deva and Tara falls into a pit of laughter and we see grown up Tara laughing in front of BK recalling the incident. This show is really moving something inside me. It's so heart warming tbh.

37.) Ok. So now they are celebrating BK's b'day and she has a cake-cum-aate-ka-halwa. BK lights up a matchstick and the small speck of fire again ignites that trauma in Tara. Poor girl is traumatized on loosing her only best friend.

38.) Tara and BK think that Deva is dead. And, Badshah has been bought by someone in exchange of lakhon rupiye. Altho, Bhojariya ji had a deal with Tara that she would pay him to keep Badshah in the Sehgal Estate but upon getting a greater amount of money, naturally, Bhojariya Ji sells it.

39.) Tara is heart-broken that she could not keep his only belonging safe and so apologizes to Deva (who she thinks is in heaven) and we are instantly taken to a hilltop where we see a man, also in white. So. Deva. He is alive and probably a reech buzinez man, i think? And, now, the plot is quite predictable, Tara will try to take back Badshah from that 'man' and he will in turn not reveal that he is indeed Deva becoz there is some misunderstanding on both of their side. So. He will try to seek revenge from Tara for what he had to go through in the past. As it is clear from the line, "Bohot jal chuka suraj, ab chaand ko jalna hoga." Wow. What a beautiful parallel tho. (Suraj-Deva and Chaand-Tara and also the title of the story makes a lot more sense now.)

40.) Ok. So. Jalebi reminded me that I did not mention Deva's entry scene. So. Yeah. Deva's entry scene, huh? Wow. Yeah. Sirf. Wow. I had literal goosebumps already and then that drone shot from the hilltop. The teapot hanging above the fire. Lol. What a traditional way to make chai amidst nowhere. Btw where did he get chai ki patti from? And what about chini? Cup? Lol. Banda puri taiyyari ke saath aaya tha. So. Yeah. Amazing scene. Handsome Deva. Beautiful white suit. Already swooning.

Not-so-Fun Fact : Damn this reminds me that I have been chai-deprived since yesterday coz chai was finished and no one in our house(as in me and my parents) were bothered enough to bring it from the general store altho we all were very much bothered for not being able to have a cup of chai. uGh. Whatever.

41.) Wow. Wow. Wow. This show has already started to cast its spell on me, to be honest. And it's just the first episode.

P.S. : So. Yeah. Very beautiful. Very very very beautiful indeed. Cinematography wise. Script wise. Costume wise. Look wise. Everything is perfect for Chaand Jalne Laga. TBH I was underestimating this show but it indeed is beautiful. Please do give it watch. Ok. Then. Bye. God bless you.

[torto-isemusings]

Ah, Common Sense Media: One Million Moms on a budget.

Home of one of the worst, most ignorant reviews of our beloved Incredibox I've ever seen (below)

One star from an Adult. A tough crowd these ones.

Join me, dear Reader, as I Torto breakdown the points of this review one. By. One.

For your entertainment, of course ;)

1) "Nobody will like this lackluster 'game'"

*hysterical, borderline-demonic hyena laugh*

But seriously, given the amount of fanart, mods, YouTube videos, and blogs dedicated to this game it seems like the word "nobody" implies whole swaths of people in the definition. *Sparticus voice* I AM NOBODY!

2) "The same man is copy-pasted at least 6 times"

Most people who complain about this haven't done the bare minimum of research to discover that, yes, they are all one man. That is, of course, Paul "Incredible Polo" Malburet, who voiced them all. It's meant to showcase what *just one man* can do with his (aptly named) incredible voice. Love you, Polo❤️

3) "There's really nothing to do but click on the men to produce lackluster sounds"

Say that to his adorable face, I dare you!

Risk being the target of Gallic Rage!

4) "Sure, there are different costumes but they do nothing to enhance the game"

OP must be really fun at Halloween parties /s. Repeat after me: "Costumes enhance *everything*!" Also, now that you've taken a shot at Paul, you can't resist taking a shot at Romain as well, how thoughtful. Love you too, Bily❤️

5) "There are no puzzles [or] prize wheels"

Okay, I'll give them this one. Even though the bonuses are kind of like puzzles, no puzzle just gives you the answer by hovering over the icon. However, I think this is one of the things that makes Incredibox so special: It's not about puzzles. It isn't one of those instant gratification, constant rush of dopamine games(which, imo, are on par with the "brainrot" section of YouTube). Just like writing your own music, you have to stew on it for a while, see what works, and most of all enjoy it! Experimentation can be fun!

6) "There's no way to customize the look-alike men -they're all in boring black and white"

First, see my rebuttal to point #2. Second, this just tells me you didn't play past Little Miss(which is all but confirmed later). LM is only the second version. Each version gets better than the last as the guys hone their craft. Even your oh-so-despised costumes get better! In Jeevan alone you have practically all the colors of the goddamn rainbow! At the end of the day, even though Incredibox is more about the music than anything else, the costumes are a neat bonus that keep things visually interesting. Long story short, if you want customization The Sims is right there.

7) "The game is so boring I quit after 1 minute"

While I'm pretty sure 1 minute is an exaggeration, this does pretty much confirm OP didn't play past Little Miss. Geez, even a goldfish would know you need to pay attention for more a minute to accurately assess the quality of a game.

8)"It takes about 25 minutes to load the game"

This one's just a flat out lie.

9) "The developer isn't even updating the game anymore...terribly outdated...stuck in 2019"

Patience, Grasshopper. The latest bonus for Wekiddy was released only 9-10 months ago. That isn't forever. I'm sure all three guys are working their culs off to get the third one out in a timely manner. Especially Allan, who I haven't mentioned yet. Love you as well, Al❤️

Also define "stuck in 2019"? What does a game have to do in order to be worthy of the 2020s, include a Covid-themed version?

10) "Forget about Incredibox and just get My Singing Monsters instead"

...you're lucky TV Tropes lists us as Friendly Fandoms, or I would get mad at that. I however won't because I'm mad enough.

And there you have it, Reader, my full thoughts on this godawful review. Tell me your thoughts in the tags, and if there was anything I missed💜

[insomanic-fanfication]

🍃🌹I feel like this could help my Mutal Writers🌹🍃

Author's note: Writing can be entertaining and a way to let that creativity from your mind flow. For some, it can even be a coping mechanism. However, you can even get burnt out from things that you enjoy. That's okay! And it is, in fact, normal! Believe it or not, even professionals get writer's block; it's part of the writing process to help you think outside the box or different perspective.

Sources to help with writer's block:

How has my writing process been? How do I tend to do writing?:

Let me use one of my drafts as an example! Important understanding: When figuring out how to eliminate your own writer's block or write your fanfictions. It's prevalent to see how others write or their working process and feel discouraged when their way doesn't work for you. So here is some context about myself before I show you my writing process and why it works for me. While it may not work for others.

I am an Autistic 19-year-old (20 in 4 months, Jesus fucking Christ..), Transman. Working a full-time job and made this blog a side project and hobby. While being polyamorous, I am also Ace! So this will bleed into my writing without me knowing.

I've found ways to help me write are being in places where other people are working too; this is why you can often spot them in local coffee shops. Seeing a lot of college students and genius people working on their laptops and being productive tends to help me do the same!

Whereas, if I stayed in my room, I find it's much easier to get distracted or begin to procrastinate.

My actual writing process, Using one of my drafts as an example:

Draft in Question: "Shotgunning" Stoner Wally West x Male Reader

The title, content warning, author's notes, and summary are great places to start. It can help you understand where to take the fanfiction, no matter how long it's been since you opened the draft.

Don't be afraid if you don't know exactly where to start! There is no rule saying you have to start at the beginning of the fanfiction; if you have an idea of part of it, then you can start from there. Once you write that part, make a paragraph about how the situation gets to that point. Doing the same after the section.

The 2 purpose rule:

"When re-reading to edit, there must be 2 reasons for the edit that furthers the plot."

As someone that creates something, we often become our most prominent critic by deleting an entire paragraph because we believe it's not good enough. This is where we can become burnt out or discouraged about our writing abilities. By doing this, you are limiting your editing and, in return, limiting your stress about getting it " just right."

An expectation of this rule is to make sure the work is easy to follow. Write as much as you can, then step back from it for an hour or two, Then re-read it and write for better clarity. Only allow yourself to do this once or twice after finishing the fanfiction. Then press post! Post it before your anxiety tells you to keep editing or "Let's change this one thing first.". No! You're done, post or schedule it, and go to the next draft!

______________________________________________________________

I hope this helped someone that's struggling with some things. If the draft seemed interesting, check out my blog or more posts! I also reblog others' works; check out my reblog master list!

Have a fanfiction idea that you don't have time to write yourself? Request it! My request/ ask inbox is always opened!

Tags: @prismuffin @n0cturna1-m3 @gatorbites-imagines

[avese23]

Can’t deal with people who act all personally aggrieved that they can’t personalize the entire internet to their personal happy place. Especially people who then go out looking for things to get mad at

(This isn’t about people venting about trolls or harassment. It sucks. I’m sorry. Fuck bullies and bigots. This also isn’t about flash warnings, and anything that keeps people with epilepsy safe)

But like, it’s not other people’s job to read your mind and guess what hyperspecific trigger you have then manually tag everything for one person. I’ve seen people ask creators to tag images with the character their blog is about. Just block the blog. That’s not a safe blog for you.

It’s not other people’s job to explain that fucked up shit in fiction is not real. You’re not a child and we’re not your parents here to hold your hand and reassure you that the actor is only playing dead.

I think a good example of effective content warnings is Hazbin. They’re not gonna put one up every individual episode to tell you a show full of swearing and gore is gonna have swearing and gore. But episode 4 is more graphic than any other episode so it’s given a separate warning. Because someone signing up for the rest of the episodes might genuinely be taken aback by that one.

Or Hashtag Ruthless Productions always putting heavy topics in their politics section. Asking for a warning every episode would be silly when you can just skip the politics section. You know it’s gonna be venting and politics. So don’t be surprised when it’s about politics. But if they talk about dark topics that aren’t typically brought up in that fandom they do give warning. For instance most people wouldn’t expect a discussion about eating disorders when the hosts talk about the cult in Wayward Son. Or a spoiler for Star Trek in a podcast about Buffy. So *then* it makes sense.

It’s social kindness and being stewardess to recognize when you as a creator are putting out something unexpectedly and objectively shocking to people who didn’t consent to it. It’s not other people’s job however, to use common sense for you. Or to read your mind. Don’t click on a video about a movie and get mad at spoilers for that mobile. Don’t read the Bible and get mad about major character death (Christian’s don’t come after me with a ‘well actually’ I haven’t read it 😭)

Speaking of Christianity if you’re someone who gets mad at Christian’s being upset by goths wearing crosses (which is silly) but then get upset by what people are writing about your blorbos on ao3 you might wanna do some soul searching.

So no I don’t care about your DNI list. No I don’t care that you only want virgos to reblog your post about Home Depot. No I don’t care that you can’t tell the difference between an anime character and a person, between real life and a plot point, between internet drama and an actual crime. I find that dude from Friends ugly af to that point I cringe but I’m not gonna go harass fandom accounts or look up every bad thing the characters done and accuse blogs of being bad people. I don’t like a lot of ATLA ships and think both Zutara and Kataang are morally gross af but I’m not gonna say the writers or the fans are sympathizing with pedophilia or abuse. Cuz that’s ridiculous.

When I publish works I’m gonna make it clear what kind of story it is. And then I’m gonna step back and tell the fucking story. I’m not gonna pop up every other chapter to warn people that a gay character calls another gay character a fag affectionately. Or a character in a toxic relationship *shocker* is having a bad time. I’m not gonna tell people that the horror work has gore and a jump scare. It’s horror.

Cuz I’m not gonna infantilize my audience and trust that they can set their own boundaries when it comes to stories they want to consume. No one is forcing them.

Media isn’t sex you don’t have to check in with every escalation. Entertainment isn’t your textbook, Phillip Schuyler is allowed to have no sons. A character isn’t your child they’re allowed to wear what they want and go on dangerous ass quests.

It’s frustrating being told to choose between assholes who project their own privilege onto others and assholes who project their own trauma onto others. Nuance exists.

Now block me dear lord, you’re doing the inventor of the block button a disservice when you get off on being pissed off

[panelshowsource]

sorry this is so long — i let my inbox back up a little but also some of these are so thoughtful and i hate not responding thoughtfully!

remember to block the tag 'long post' if you hate seeing long posts :')

first of all aww anon thank you so much and second of all you don't watch taskmaster? how can you stand following my blog if you don't? hahahahah especially during taskmaster season i feel so bad the blog ends up being like 70% tm even though if i could have it may way i'd never gif new content and just gif totally random old content like always hehehehehe but it's cute to me how many hog fans are in my inbox these days! i'll try and gif it more for you guys :)

and you should watch taskmaster!!! and come back and tell me what you think!! start with s1!!! it's on the masterpost linked in my bio!

idk anon you'd have to ask them that but generally they would consider themselves to be irish-american; i wasn't trying to make a statement about that when i said that i think new yorkers understand a person like ed, though i think it's far to say that even diasporic communities will retain (at least) a handful of characteristics and nuances from their homelands

yesssss we all love ed! i think a lot of us know him from mock the week and his bffship with dara (i have some of their travel buddy series on my non-panel show masterpost!), but of course he's also an accomplished standup!

actually, just last month in an exclusive with metro he said this:

It seems remarkable Ed hasn’t appeared yet in its 16 seasons. ‘They haven’t asked. If they had, I would,’ Ed said, with a dash of longing. ‘There’s really only one slot per series of someone answering my description,’ he mused. ‘We’re kind of the most overprescribed demographic in the industry. There’s no shortage of people who look and sound like me that are ahead of me in the queue for that slot.’ Even so, it would have been nice… Greg? Are you listening?

(ps. that article claiming 8 out of 10 cats is cancelled... 👀 don't get me wrong, i know it's been a couple years since it's been on, but afaik no cancellation was ever announced 👀)

i know a lot of people are very hung up on the fact david mitchell said he wouldn't do taskmaster — and i'm a sure there are a handful of others who either wouldn't or couldn't when they were asked (jack dee had a scheduling conflict back in the day, right? and alex still desperately wants him?) — but one thing that has been consistently reinforced for years, and especially since taskmaster moved to channel 4, is it is far and away the biggest, most in-demand opportunity amongst comedians and light entertainers (— on network television; of course, if you're standup, your own standup special on channel 4, netflix, whatever has gotta be number one, but i disgress). taskmaster is huge: everyone talks about how comedians play 100-seat rooms, go on taskmaster, and then BOOM sell out massive tours. the show can really change your life, so there is hardly a comedian who wouldn't go on if given the chance — especially someone like ed, who i had mentioned a couple months ago being of the jenny eclair variety (an opportunist; professional jealousy ain't no stranger). i know he's waiting for that damn phone to ring!

and i think he makes an incredible point that not many series are gunning for more than one straight white middle-aged man (though it's happened before, of course). actually, i was just thinking about how that role — the white, middle-aged, experienced senior comedian — is chosen; in almost every single case, it's a very famous comedian who will draw viewers and reinforce legitimacy (frank skinner, al murray, hugh dennis, bob mortimer, rhod gilbert, david baddiel, richard herring, lee mack, alan davies, dara, you get the point) or it's a comedian who alex, whether he's friends with them or not, really really likes (tim key, dave gorman, mark watson, tim vine, mike wozniak, i know they're well-known but even ardal o'hanlon and julian clary who alex personally loves). does ed fall into either of those categories? super famous ratings draw or one of alex's friends/comedy heroes? frankly...i'm not sure...and i think that may be what's keeping him mid-way down the list...

still, very cute of the journalist from this article to be gunning so hard for him to be on the show! i have to admit, i know it might seem like i'm biased because i like him, but i really really think he would be really really good on the show. imo — and it's just imo, people will disagree — the most important aspect of the best series of taskmaster is the banter. it's people who speak up, who fight, who tease, who want to win, who want laughs, who play off the audience, who make quick friends, who talk to greg, who talk to alex. ed TALKS. ed wants screen time. ed wants to fuck around. ed wants to win. so i think he would really take advantage of the format and i'd love to see it!

you are allowed to say i told you so! it was amazing! thanks for reading my bullshit, i tried to take it really seriously so i could just link to it any time someone asks me if i've seen it hahahah who was your fave contestant?

i could write a really long response to this because it's something i have — or could find lmfao — a lot to say about, but knowing this post is already gonna be long (hahah i hate myself) lemme try to boil my brain down

1) i covered my personal opinion of what makes the strongest series of taskmaster in my (very long) recent taskmaster nz s2 post; 2) recency bias — it's in the name! people are biased because it's recent [shrug]; 3) A LOT of people have not seen every series of taskmaster (gasp! i know...) so they won't have the full taskmaster uk canon in mind when they're making such claims; 4) there is a strong divergence between the comedy nerds who watch taskmaster for comedy and the light entertainment viewers who watch taskmaster for general pleasantness, and you gotta consider who you're talking to when you're listening to someone's opinion; 5) i think there's a very long convo you could have about the reticence of a huge faction of taskmaster fans to criticise the show/tasks/contestants/alex — which is why a lot of people like it and its community, because it's often an echo chamber of positivity — but maybe we won't have that convo now haha

^ me being concise!! wow never thought we'd see that day

yes totally anon! i'll make massive gifsets of all of them when the season ends, if that works? :)

wow interesting question! i know a few people who watch taskmaster on and off, and i definitely know people like you who enjoy the odd clip (why is it always bob mortimer on wilty lmfaooo), but otherwise i wouldn't say i spend too much time convincing people to watch stuff. wilty and taskmaster are pretty accessible, but a lot of panel shows are about the uk news, uk current events, have uk c-list celeb guests, etc, and i don't think people would be interested. plus, i have you guys!!! (i don't really have internet friends besides posting here and interacting with you guys :'))

not that long ago, i was at a dinner party and someone said, "have you seen that show taskmaster?" and ... do you know what it's like for me!!! ... i had to take a deep breath and say inside my head 'sarah be cool' and i finally went, "i have! fun show haha" and not start TWITCHING ... they were telling the people around us a little bit about it and getting some of the details wrong and i just sat there nodding like :) and didn't correct them bc being a know-it-all isn't cool and i didn't want to risk it 💀

it's too bad we don't have more of a light entertainment culture here, especially a comedian-driven one :(

(so random but speaking of light entertainment has anyone else been seeing michael barrymore all over tiktok? those kids say the funniest things clips are my wholeeeee fyp)

hahaha yesss we do know suzi around here!! though she's not been on many panel shows recently-ish so i probably haven't posted her in a while. if your fave taskmaster contestants are wide-eyed, smiley people who radiate optimism and go-get-em attitudes then suzi would definitely be the one!

did i mention rick edwards or is this just your sly way of bringing up a sexy man? ...i see you anon😏 he has the face of someone who should have been working on that big wall in games of thrones you know the one where jon tory scum snow ended up? that's a specific compliment but just trust me it's complimentary

i'm sorry about your heartbreak :( it's like me with whites, we've all got that one show :(

yesss it so is! <3

is it weird to imagine joe and mike woz in the same room or is that just me...

—

WATCH LINKS MASTERPOST / FAQ / TAGS / ASK

[doublegoblin]

Author Ask Tag Game

Well this is a biggin! Thanks for the TAG @gummybugg

I send an invite to @asterhaze (Lol I know gummy tagged ya but nyeh) @angie-j-kay @tailoroffates @tisiphonewolfe @lola-theshowgrl @conkers-theficwriter (that's right I got you and your alt, talk about that fanfic!) @stanrendipity @randomstupidchaos @catchingbigfish

I'll be centering my attention on Rituals and Red Tape because I am nothing if not self-indulgent of my baby.

(1) What is the main lesson of your story (e.g. kindness, diversity, anti-war), and why did you choose it?

Your adversities are with you but do not have to define you Bodies are meant to be used as an expression of ones self Corporations are eldritch entities who no matter how much love they shove up your ass will replace you in a heart beat There are no true transitory spaces with which your actions can be left behind, what you may see as a place to visit is someone else's home. Angry Nihilism is the easiest and most childest response to discovering you are not the main character of a story. and Let others be content in their life, not everyone wants to be out there making a name for themselves.

Why did I choose these? To be completely honest I didn't set out with them in mind. These are what has sprung up as I delved into writing more and more and was finding some elements that were hidden from me while I fiddled with the keys. These are as much lessons for an audience as they are for myself.

(2) What did you use as inspiration for your worldbuilding (like real-life cultures, animals, famous media, websites, etc.)?

So I know the stigma that was (maybe still is) attached to this statement but it comes from my dreams. Wait wait wait let me explain! So for a while I have had (although I haven't for a little bit) an ongoing sort of continuous dream. Not like the same dream over and over but more these dreams take place in the same location and I am always in this same role. I would give my partner "lore updates" every so often because it was something fun. Well on a long car ride (3hr) we spent the time chit chatting and I realized I wanted to make a story out of this. So during the same car ride the basic skeleton of the story started to emerge. Then wham bam thank ya mam fast forward and here we are. A lot of the world building also just kinda spring from my own imagination. Like I'm sure I maybe got the pieces from soooomewhere but can't tell ya, unless they are an obvious reference to something like the Giants on The Farm being "as tall as windmill" being a reference to Don Quixote, just small little nuggets here and there.

(3) What is your MC trying to achieve, and what are you, the writer, trying to achieve with them? Do you want to inspire others, teach forgiveness, help readers grow as a person?

Alex is honestly just trying to get through each assignment with all their limbs still on their body and as little paperwork to do as possible. They just want to have a nice easy life that is comfortably mundane. What I want to do is entertain first and foremost. Like sure my stuff can have lessons and morals and whattheshit but if it isn't entertaining to at least one person I feel I have failed. And also, maybe help someone who needs to work through some stuff do so through Alex or anyone else in the book. I can't say for certain that can or will happen but there is always a chance.

(4) How many chapters is your story going to have?

No idea, as many as it needs to be told in full. I'll know when we get there lol.

(5) Is it fanfiction or original content? Where do you plan to post it?

Teehee time to self promote! This is original content. And I post the first draft chapters on here but I post the more edited and more concrete chapters on my WattPad MaxwellAlabaster I try and have the stuff on here accessible through their own dedicated pages on my blog and up to date.

(6) When and why did you start writing?

I started to write this story about a year ago. It started as a writing only for me kind of thing as I was dealing with some life stuff. But, once I started to write and post my stuff on here I really fell in love with the hobby and putting my things out there for people to hopefully enjoy!

(7) Do you have any words of engagement for fellow writers of Writeblr? What other writers of Tumblr do you follow?

Despite my verboseness I can be quite shy and anxious. So i tend to follow people who follow me first lol. It's not out of a self inflated ego but an uneasy feeling. So far it's worked out well and I've really enjoyed the people I have interacted with! Even if it's just getting little hearts here and there.

Something I adopted early and fully: Write for yourself (but we've all heard that before!) Fine! Write slop. Like just absolute pig pleasing slop. Not everything needs to be the next big seller, the most enjoyable, or "good" piece of literature. Write what makes you happy and what you have fun writing. Go outside your comfort zone and make an absolute mess of it all. You don't have to post everything after all. This is advice for even those of you that rely on writing for an income. When you can, just write the hottest and most fun garbage that you want. It's really refreshing to just go hog wild and look at the word doc or whatever and go "Wow...this is horrible, I love it".

Also don't let people tell you there is only one way to write. Like yeah grammar and stuff is good for being comprehensible, but there is power in each punctuation you use;or leave out~ Get flowery with your language too sometime Steve doesn't cheer; sometimes his voice carries so high the birds grow jealous.

Lastly: you don't need an english degree or whatever to be a writer, look at me, I have a freakin science degree. Did you put words on a page to convey a meaning of feeling? You are a writer. Don't let others take that away from you. You are a writer because you write dam it.

[forthesanityofstorytellers]

Author Ask Tag

Ooo I haven't done this one yet 😁😁 Was tagged by @anyablackwood (here) and @gummybugg (here), thanks you guys!

I mean technically you both tagged my main but this is my author profile so there, lol

ANYWAY

A quick light tagging of @moonluringfrost @adie-dee @astellarium @bloodlessheirbyjacques @winterandwords @afoolandathief

and on we go! Using Abracadabra for any WIP-related questions

1. What is the main lesson of your story (e.g. kindness, diversity, anti-war), and why did you choose it?

Be annoying a do crime? lol Ehhhh don't really have one. Though Rod (MC) does muse at the end:

My mother survives through me because I choose to remember her traditions. Whenever it is that I truly die, I will only live as long as my stories do. Beings, Terrans and otherwise, are easily forgotten. Stories and traditions are not. I guess that’s all any of us can truly strive for.

So...ig if there's a lesson of Abracadabra it's to make your story a good one? As in one that you like and are proud to have been a part of, one that those close to you will want to tell and close to them will want to tell, etc etc

2. What did you use as inspiration for your worldbuilding (like real-life cultures, animals, famous media, websites, etc.)?

I'd say 'not a lot' but in all honesty I took inspiration from probably a thousand different things and each bit was a thought or idea or small detail or something similar, and so I can't point to one thing and say 'yes, this inspired the world of Abracadabra'. Plus it's set on modern-day earth, so...I feel like the snippets of inspiration would be evident to those who watch/read the same things I do, lol

3. What is your MC trying to achieve, and what are you, the writer, trying to achieve with them? Do you want to inspire others, teach forgiveness, and help readers grow as a person?

We both have very simple aims; to be entertained, to tell a good story, and to maybe play a trick or two.

4. How many chapters is your story going to have?

Right now it's standing at 29. I was hoping to get it up to at least 30 initially, and hopefully with the re-write I'll manage to get it up there. If for no other reason that to make it a nice round number, lol

5. Is it fanfiction or original content? Where do you plan to post it?

Original content. I plan to self-pub once it's done, but...I dunno, I'm entertaining other options. I mean I'm still going to self-pub once it's done, but I'm waffling between doing things like putting up done chapters on Tumblr. I also entertained the idea of using Neocities to make a blog where you can read all the stuff for free, using Substack for chapter releases before publishing, posting on Royal Road...etc.

6. When and why did you start writing?

In general? I started writing when I was 12 (I think, may have been before that) and it was legitimately reading Lloyd Alexander and thinking, "can I do this? Can I write like this?" and no one told me I couldn't, so I did. And now here we are.

For Abracadabra? I think I started writing it in 2016 as a part of a trilogy where each book followed a different MC with one large overlapping plotline so you got to see what the others were doing when they ran into a different MC. And said trilogy started because I began working with my dad (one of my biggest fantasy/storytelling influences) in my first actual collab. We were about halfway through the first book when he got diagnosed with cancer. By the time I got to the third book (now Abracadabra) I was on my own and felt I needed to finish the story. Possibly why Abracadabra has the 'lesson' about our lives being stories that live in other's hands.

7. Do you have any words of engagement for fellow writers of Writeblr? What other writers on Tumblr do you follow?

My dad had a saying. "I didn't cheat, I used all my resources to the best of my ability."

While hilarious and also said to cover up the fact that he was, in fact, cheating (and I can hear him saying that to me now, because he insisted to his dying day that it's not cheating and it's a mantra I'll adopt at opportune moments) man was also a genius, observant, and hacking computer systems in high school. In the 70s. So when we accused him of cheating on computer games, what he was saying in a hilarious and quippy way was "I figured out how to reprogram the game to bring my desires of how I want this game into the parameters of how it functions because I that is a thing I know how to do."

Point being, to other writeblrs...don't be afraid to use all your resources to the best of your ability. Cheat the hell out of the system.

...

Also back up all your digital shit. Save it in at least three different places, make sure one of them is in an offline format or - even better - an offline removable format (like a portable hard drive or usb, or even written down on physical paper). My first book took two years longer than it was supposed to because the laptop I was using crashed two days after I finished the first draft and three years of work went down the drain and the only thing I had left was about three pages of a cut scene I wrote in the middle of history class. I had to rebuild it from memory.

I mean, it turned out better I think, because I had at least three years of writing experience to build off of at that point and that's also likely why it went faster, but I also had a panic attack when it happened and that wasn't fun.

Also the writeblrs I follow tend to be a) ones that followed me first and b) ones that I looked at and went 'oh yes, I can be friends with this person' (usually because I have begun reblogging a bunch of stuff because it made me laugh or think or nod along or I agree with it or thought it was interesting or). Not always in that order, tho lol more of a social follower ig.

[bohemianwritings]

STARTING NEW: HOW TO GET STARTED STRIPPING and SWITCHING SEX WORK

Hi, Boho’s, I am up early and it’s because of y’all! I had a reader reach out to me about wanting to know how to get started and switching from one type of sex work to another in the industry. Also, I thought it might be helpful to talk about the challenges that come from your first few shifts, how to overcome nerves, and the similarities and differences between the different types of sex work and why stripping can be complementary.

 That felt super wordy, and I apologize but what a great idea from one of our readers. Thank you all for supporting and reading. This blog will always be free of ads or spam. I don’t accept payments of any kind. This work is for your eyes only and I hope it helps.

 HOW TO GET STARTED STRIPPING & SWITCHING SEX WORK

 Baby strippers listen up! Or want to be dancers or aspiring entertainers, today we are going to talk about finally making the switch. That’s right to go into the club and fill out that application. Not just nailing the audition which I have another post about. But what it’s like to work there for the first few days and weeks and how to keep a positive mental attitude while staying somewhat in reality.

 Let’s say you’ve nailed your audition thanks to this sweet blog here and you’re ready for your first real shift. The first shift after the audition NEVER counts, you don’t know the club, the drinks, the clients, or the girls. The first shift doesn’t plan on making anything and being happy with what you do end up with. The first night is all about research – don’t get drunk, be super observant of everything you see, and don’t expect to make much. (My first night I made $340, and I’ll never forget it).

 The second shift (after your hired shift) might feel awkward. There isn’t the anxiety or excitement that might be there from the first night. However, use this to your advantage! I’m dead serious. The first 6 months of your stripping career the money will come the easiest and the fastest. Now you might not make the most because you don’t know the ways to hustle but it will be easy money. There are several reasons for this.

1.        You are fresh meat. The club and the clients see this and will respond accordingly.

2.        You are not a hardened veteran and that vulnerability in the club is only seen with baby strippers.

3.        You might not have firm boundaries. This is different per person but the longer I danced, the less I put up with.

4.        People don’t mind if you tell them, you are new. They like it and it’s a great icebreaker.

 The other great way to start on a good foot is to tip all the staff. Tip your door girl, manager (if they are allowed to take tips), DJ, Bartender, and favorite waitress or VIP girl. DO NOT spend your money tipping other dancers. I have another post on why dancers are not your friends. Invest wisely in the people who will let you know when the club is hot or slow, who to go sit with, or who is looking for a dancer. They will be most likely your biggest allies especially if they know you tip them. I would always give like my extra $20 to the door changing out funny money and tipping out the DJ so I don’t have to go on stage etc.

Locker Room Dynamics

                  This one like in gym class can be SO hard to figure out at a new club. Unless your club assigns lockers (and some do) you will have to pick your own. This means making sure you are not stealing someone else’s normal spot. This might be one person, or it might be a clique of dancers in the top corner. Whatever the reason find a locker on the bottom somewhere discreet until you get the lay of the land.

                   Do not spend time in the locker room when you are new. This is an easy way to psyche yourself out and get hazed. Come ready to work (full makeup and everything) and just change out quickly in the dressing room. In and out quickly. Once you figure out the girls and personalities you can start to get ready in there or do more things but at first keep to yourself and thank me later.

  Cell Phone & Purse

                  It’s standard now to carry a bag around with you to put your money, lip gloss, phone, mirror, and whatever else. What is not standard is sitting at the bar on your phone because you are too scared to approach people. Whatever you do, do not get out your phone. It’s a HUGE turn-off to anyone coming in or looking over at you. If you are looking at your phone, you will miss huge signs that someone is into you or someone worthwhile just walked in. Clients will not come up to you if you are on your phone. The only time you should get your phone out is to accept Venmo etc. and get their contact info but never GIVE out your real number. Get a burner number app like Text Now.

 Cute Outfits and Makeup

I cannot stress enough that when you look good, you’ll feel good and make more money. At a new club, I would always come in super ready for work, dressed super glam. I looked the same as the day they hired me (v. demure v. mindful). I would do this because it would be a huge confidence boost. I would always plan my outfits and switch halfway through my shifts. It was predictable to know what I was going to look like and wear. Also, find comfy clothes that are easy to get on and off and are durable lol keep those in rotation. In addition, find makeup that doesn’t make your skin break out. The last thing you want to worry about is caked-up makeup on inflamed skin. Keep it the same, simple routine with clothes and makeup.

 Hair

This is where I say do whatever you want and that the club allows. Some might have rules even though they shouldn’t.

  DAY 5

So now let’s say you’ve done a few shifts and gotten the hang of things, now what? The newness has worn off and it might seem like a job (because it is.) This is when you need to focus on your WHY YOU STARTED. Get that bag and get off your phone (unless you are bringing in regulars). I have a post on landing regular clients, but you should be doing this DAY 1 if not by DAY 5, within two weeks even at a new club I would have regulars. It was that easy. So, schedule your regulars, put your favorite outfit on, don’t get too drunk, and remember why you started – trust me it probably wasn’t to pretend you’re having fun with men twice your age.

 STARTING AT A NEW CLUB

 Perhaps you are more of a seasoned veteran who is moving to a new city or started working in a different subset of the sex industry and wants to try stripping for the first time. The tips above apply as well but I have some additional insights for switching.

 If you are just moving and going from club to club the transition is much easier. Clubs just have different rules in different cities that you must abide by or could get fined. Still, take the first night as a loss and go in the second night ready to hustle. By 1 week you should be comfortable and if not then find a different club that matches your vibe more. I would never stick it out longer than a week if I was unhappy and/or not making $.

 The best part about starting as a new club is using it as an opportunity to reinvent yourself. Dye your hair, get a nose job, boobs done, BBL, fillers, who cares. No one from the old club will be there and you can even get a whole new stage name. I don’t suggest this because I would forget my name if it wasn’t the same at every club.

SWITCHING ROLES

But when you are switching from one profession in sex work to another like if you were an escort or OF girl coming to the strip club it will take on a whole different level of reality. For cam girls, or virtual OF workers, sitting in the club with real people that might be able to touch you can be intimidating. For the touching, (if you allow this) you will get used to it and it won’t feel as overwhelming after about a month. I would alleviate some of that sensory overload by taking a shower immediately when I got home.

 Cam or virtual girl-to-club will be different because you can only talk to really one patron at a time. You can go back and forth but that is exhausting and can cause jealousy between the patrons or with the other dancers and I don’t recommend it. Unlike online where dozens of people might be tipping or watching the idea here is to go after the one that spends the most. You don’t want to sit with a bunch of people tipping $1 because it’s not as fast as it is online. Find the one who will tip $$$$$$$ and latch onto them the whole night. I would kick other girls out of my section if they came close to my customer.

 For escorts, this might be easier depending on the type of arrangement but in my experience, escorting is mostly done in person. This will HELP you in the club in a ton of ways. You are used to meeting strangers and having a conversation at least. You know what kind of banter to have and what rules are expected. However, DO NOT tell anyone you escort. THEY WILL TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU AT BEST or try and get you fired or arrested at worst. Keep that a big, BIG secret, and don’t go looking for “John’s at the clubs” as the movie The Hangover would lead you to believe. Keep each aspect of the business different as they are not comparable except, they belong to the same industry. Also, keep your boundaries extremely firm. You might be used to escorting and allowing some behaviors for some and not others. In the club, treat them all the same. Don’t make exceptions that will blur lines and make you uncomfortable. Compared to escorting, stripping is just different. Less is expected, you make less but it’s easier work overall. The emotional toll isn’t as high.  

  Just because you are new doesn’t mean you have to take shit from the dancers or anyone else that works there or the patrons themselves. Know your worth. You can find another club and leave whenever you want. You hold the power. Don’t let anything in that environment tell you otherwise. Also the first 6 months you will make the most money at a new club or as a baby stripper. Take advantage and work as much as possible. After 6 months the newness wears off and you’ll see another new girl getting the attention you first got. Keep going, it’s not about how much you make per shift but being consistent with yourself, your goals and your clients.

 Love & Glitter,

BW