#i never mind ppl expressing themselves
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chanstopher · 1 year ago
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Hi! Im sorry to bother you 😭 but the last two days have been a rollercoaster of emotions and I usually don't really keep up with the drama so I can't tell if this whole situation is normal or not lol
Also I totally understand if you're done talking about it, so feel free to just ignore this 🙏
I just can't get rid of the feeling that it's all being handled in a weird way, it's pretty obvious that it is the company that pushed this decision, Chan basically said it himself in that fansign video. And while I agree with ppl that it might be a good thing for chan to take a break from chans room but I don't get why is it done so poorly. He hasn't mentioned chans room since june and he's the only member that hasn't gone live lately...
Wouldn't be easier for everyone including jype, chan and stays, if Chan said smth like chans room will come back someday or that it won't come back, maybe say that he's busy and taking a break. Today he had to spend the entire day sending cryptic messages on bbl, now he clearly wants stays to stop bringing attention to it, but without any answers ppl are still going to speculate about it yk? Basically, I don't see how this way of handling everything benefits anyone, especially Chan, cuz there are already ppl blaming him...🥲 Sorry for ranting 😭
sadly when it comes to kpop we very rarely get clear answers. back in june chris posted on bubble saying he wasn’t able to do it for the foreseeable future. i think we all assumed that meant a little while but between the bowing thing and how stays and the other fandom have reacted on top of just how insane the boys schedule has been i’m not surprised he’s at a point where channies room isn’t so possible. it does suck and it’s hard to tell what the real reason is, my guess is a combination of a lot of things, as to why it’s gone but i think it’s going to be one of those things we have to just accept. if and when chris finds the time or ability to do it again it will happen. if not it’s truly sad but chris has honestly been too busy for it for years now but has put the time in anyway and i think he’s been holding himself to the promise longer than he should have. channies room has always been my favorite part of the week, but if he needs to stop it’s just something we have to respect.
also jype is literally just always garbage at announcing or keeping fans informed of anything. after how they never talked about hyunjins hiatus or let the meme era talk about him at like all during that time i expect nothing from that company to be presented well unless it’s making them money lmao
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mihai-florescu · 7 months ago
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Hm... i do wish it was normalized to talk about how yes you can have an interesting meaningful story involving characters with ocd coded or intrusive thoughts towards younger characters and it can be an important character trait that doesnt define them or one that is indicative of a set of values etc but you as a fan need to simultaneously be aware of the context of the story. Why do you think i lament being forsaken to like gacha games stories. The choices are made with intent to sell and appeal to an audience that will pay. I just think it's important to keep it mind that, and it pains me to see people who express concern at intentionality being labeled "freaks cuz they thought of that in the first place" i promise you theyre not the freaks for being concerned. So while i do think HE is definitely trying to appeal to new younger audiences with modern teen characters and the use of tiktok, it is important to keep history, audience, and possible further interests in mind too. Well from the bottom of my heart i hope none of the new characters ever get cards like that one hyena aira 4* but it is always good to stay cautious. I dont understand how ppl parrot being "critical of the media we consume" but then not being ok with talking about such fanservice that is undeniably there. Yet i understand reluctancy to admit you're not the target audience, and the willingness to just ignore anything you dont like... i might've been guilty of it myself at points.
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cosmicdenro · 2 years ago
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hope u guys don't mind me being a little queer sometimes and talking to myself in the tags, it helps clear my head since people can filter out rant posts easily
#bc i had not used this place in a while until late 2022 ive absolutely forgotten if i used to talk to myself in tags here before or not#i say this bc i now have people who actively see my art here n just throwing random rants here would be very rude so i prefer tags help#feels safer here too LOL#also feels a little scary but im sure that's normal for many that there are ppl who read all tags mein gott#NOT A BAD THING THAT PPL READ TAGS i wouldn't be writing anything if i wanted to kill people for reading tags lol#just stating observations aheem aheem#its like writing on a public bathroom's walls and people passing by to be like “damn bitch ok” /funny#also do not worry at all about how i express myself i do apologize if my words sometimes sound like im on the brink but like#violence is the only way i love to be expressive HELP#watch me be on the government watchlist for the shit ive said gootbyeeeeeeee#but do not feel worried i will be ok eventually every time. sometimes i just gotta explode oh so violently to deflate and feel normal again#WISH I COULD USE EMOJIS ON THIS DAMN PC#anyway the person im trying my damned to avoid is Sure Making It Difficult#at least the people i wanted to know why i was autotune crying baby for a while heard me out n im alive in that regard finally smile emoji#how long can you keep gently hinting you want to distance yourself from somebody until you lose your goddam mind and feel sweet relief when#they actually leave said group themselves after getting my blunt hints help help#oh i sound so fucking rude with just my side but mein gott i don't care bc it was never a serious thing to begin with#just shot my anger thru the roof for good reason and finalliegh im getting mutual distance from that person lol#never get close with ur fave artists worst mistake of my life /hj for real#u start off loving seeing them every time and then boom youre sad how things turned out every time you see them my god#also make sure ur minor friends dont feel like they need to mend things for the adults i feel so fucking sad for someone bc of this rn but#i talked to them n hopefully they understand aouhg.#anyway back to queer posting thats enough soup for today good god#ranting
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hoshigray · 1 year ago
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𝐎𝐥𝐝 𝐓𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐬, 𝐒𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐓𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐭𝐬 | toji fushiguro
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𝐒𝐲𝐧𝐨𝐩𝐬𝐢𝐬: Your ex-husband bringing the kids over for trick-or-treating is one thing; him wanting to spend the night at your place is another. But it's just for the night. There's no way one night can rekindle some old feelings...right?
𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭��𝐧𝐭𝐬: ex-husband! Toji x fem! reader - explicit content; minors DNI - the reader is around their mid-30s - Tsumiki (age 11) and Megumi (age 9) - mutual pining - kissing/makeout sessions - unprotected sex - Daddy kink - breast sucking + nipple play - fingering (f! receiving) - oral (f! receiving) - spooning + mating press - cervix fucking - breeding kink - praise - clitoral play (pressing and grinding) - pet names (baby, good girl, mama, princess, sweetie, sweet thing) - you and Toji have been divorced for five years - cameos: Gojo, Utahime and Mei Mei - mention of drool/spit and tears - humor bc I'm [not] funny.
𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐂𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 7.6k (....dawg.)
𝐀𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐍𝐨𝐭𝐞𝐬: happy Halloween, everyone!! so, randomly missed writing ex-husband! toji bc it's lowkey my favorite, soooo yeah, this is what we're doing to celebrate the end of the month! anywho, happy October, beautiful ppl, and tysm for reading my works!! Alsooo, ty for 2.8k!!!
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“Trick-or-treat!!”
“Gasp—Oh my goodness!” 
“We came to celebrate Halloween! Also, Megumi forgot his toothbrush here again.”
Opening your door to children at the sunset of Halloween day isn’t out of the ordinary or anything special. However, it’s always a pleasant surprise when it’s two kids you hold dear to your heart. You greet them with a hug, two siblings you know too well to say you’re acquainted with. If anything, you’re practically family. 
The raven-haired brother, referred to as Megumi, speaks up. “It’s not my fault! Dad was rushing me last time.”
“Because you had to bring your stuffed animals last time, holding us back for your baseball practice.” Tsumiki, the older sister, snapped back. The two argue amongst themselves in front of you as you try to mediate. It’s no avail until another voice comes to the fray.
“All right, chill out, you two.” The voice belonged to the person approaching the porch stairs, your eyesight capturing the familiar figure walking up with two duffle bags. The one standing tall before you was the father of the children, Toji Fushiguro. Who’s also known as your one and only former husband. “Get inside and finish y’r homework, or else we’re goin’ back home.” 
The siblings stop bickering and head inside, taking off their shoes at the foyer and walking upstairs. Now that they’re gone, you turn to the man with the jet-black hair, his viridian orbs focused on you. The weather was chilly, so the man wore his usual dark denim jacket over his plain black sweatshirt, matching his jeans. “You look good, big guy. What’s in the bags?”
He greets you with a curled lip, and the scar on the side of his lip lifts. “Picked them up from their after-school sports, so it’s their sports gear and costumes for tonight. Mind helpin’ me here?” 
“Hmmm,” you merge your facial expressions to that of faux pondering, turning your back to Toji. “Nah, can’t. Got dinner to finish making.”
“Hmph, should’ve known.” He makes his way through between you and the front door. “Wouldn’t wanna break your pretty nails carrying heavy shit, huh, princess?” 
You glare at him using the nickname, hating his patronizing gaze. “From what I remembered, you would never let me carry the heavy stuff because you thought I was too fragile and easy to break. So how about that, Mr. Knight in Shining Armor?”
“Really? I don’t remember sayin’ all that before. You must’ve put me in a spell.” 
“Probably, I’ve been told I’m quite cute~.”
“Mmm, nah, more like an old hag of a witch.” Toji barks a laugh at your offended reaction, and he immediately ducks and heads for the stairs when you throw a sandal at him.
“At the very least, say I’m a cute witch, fucker.” You say the final word under your breath, grabbing the sandal you threw and heading back to the kitchen.
To say you and Toji were acquainted with one another would be the biggest understatement of the century. The two of you met a decade ago, fell madly in love, and married within a year of the relationship. When you tied the knot, Tsumiki had to have been two years old, and Megumi just turned one year old. You two had been together for four years after that, and you could confidently say those were one of [if not THE] best years of your life. You often second-guessed yourself being in a relationship with someone who had children, fearing that they wouldn’t like you or ignore you.
However, those worries were blown right away as the days went by. Every time you spent time with the children brought you three closer than ever; it was to the point that they saw you as their mother. How sweet! And there’s no denying that Toji loved you. The man would break someone’s nose for you  — yes, it happened before, and it wasn’t pretty — for you were his sweet little thing that kept him going.  
Well, if it was so great, why the divorce? Let’s just say you weren’t Toji’s first love. That title would have to be awarded to the Megumi’s mother. Even in her unfortunate passing, you can tell that Toji loved that woman like no other. It didn’t make you jealous or anything, seeing the man you love still mourn for a dead woman. Hell, you’d probably do the same if you were him. But, you can’t lie; it felt like you were cast over a “shadow” when it came to her influence. It was damn near suffocating to bear, especially in those four years of marriage. So, for your sake and his aching heart, you pulled him aside and suggested a divorce. And Toji didn’t fight you on the proposition, signing the papers and setting you free from the thick air.
Although things ended between you two, that didn’t mean things stopped being what they were. If anything, it was as if nothing happened at all. Even if you still don’t live under the same roof, you still make time to hang with the Fushiguros, whether invited to some occasion or exchange phone calls or texts to check up on them. Even now, five years after your separation, it warms your heart knowing that you get to interact with the people you care about. 
There are moments you find yourself missing living under the same roof with all three of them and living alone can be pretty lonely. But all in all, as long as they’re comfortable and trust you enough to be around, there’s no need to change things up again. Like right now — the four of you sit at the dinner table eating before the kids go off trick-or-treating.
“Are you going to trick-or-treat with us, Y/n?” The brown-haired child sitting next to you asks while finishing up her dinner. 
“Sorry, not this time, gotta be at a Zoom meeting for my job in a few minutes. But I do have someone else to take my place. Gojo will be here at around—Why are you two making that face?” You stop mid-sentence to notice Megumi and Toji at the other side of the table, displaying disgusted facial expressions at the mention of the white-haired other’s name.
“Why him?” They said in unison.
“Why not??” You question their irritation.
“He’s so annoying…” Again, in unison. Proof enough that they’re father and son.
You sigh as you get up to take your plate to the sink. “Oh, come on, you two, it’s not like he’ll be with you guys the entire night. He has a party at a friend’s he’s going to later.” 
“Isn’t he too old to trick-or-treat?” Tsumiki questions, noting that Gojo is way past his undergraduate years. 
“He is, but whatever gets that prick any free sweets,” Toji answers his daughter before getting up to put his dish in the sink. 
You exit the kitchen, head into the living room, and sit on the couch. The laptop you had placed there was ready to open and unlock, and you clicked on applications and windows to look through before your meeting started in the next three to two minutes. He should be here about—
DING-DONG!!
Now.
Right on cue, you motion for Toji to grab the front door, and he follows your command. “Kids, Gojo’s here!” You shout out to the two kids who still sit at the table. “When you’re done eating, you can go upstairs and put your costumes on. But whoever finishes last has to do the dishes.” You can hear commotion from the table as the brunette rushes to put her dish in the sink and dash for the stairs. Megumi groans to himself; you giggle when you hear him mutter an “Aww man…”
You pull out your headphones to connect to your laptop, put them in their respective ears, and prepare yourself for the meeting. Ignoring the faint passive-aggressive tones of your ex-husband when greeting Gojo at the door…
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
Your eyes flutter open, noticing the lighting change around the living room. The orange sunlight no longer decorated the space, substituted with the gradual darkness that overtakes you. The only source of light you can figure out is the flashing from the television screen.
Aside from the TV, there are no other signs of life. There aren’t any signs of Tsumiki or Megumi around playing or causing a raucous. It could only mean the two are still trick-or-treating with Gojo. 
One blink, two blinks. I must’ve fallen asleep after the meeting… You hum while sinking to the couch, burying your face into the pillow. 
But…since when did your pillow act like it was breathing with a heartbeat? And…I smelt that cologne before…How?
“Ya awake now?”
You raise your head, realizing you are not lying on your couch. Technically, you were; however, you were lying on something else on the furniture with you – more like someone. 
It’s then you realize that you were lying on Toji during your entire slumber, him leaning on the end of the couch, one leg spread to make room for you to sleep on him while you sit on the other. And you can guess that you had your head on his chest, snuggling up to his warm figure. He looks at you with his green eyes now darkened by the room, yet you can see their glow from the television light. And that small smile he gives you, the scar on the right side of his lip lifted upward. The familiar butterflies in your stomach flutter like before. Like old times sake…That must be embarrassing, huh?
You frantically try to get off of him, “Sorry about that, I thought—“
“No, no,” Toji places a stern hand on your back, keeping you from moving further. “You were comfortable.” 
You stare at him for a few seconds until your face contours to a look, and a smile starts to creep up while you situate yourself back to your original position, pressing your face back on his chest to listen to the beats of his heart again. “I recall having this couch all to myself not too long ago, so where’d you come from?”
“Well, I wanted to watch some sports highlights, but I figured you’d kick my ass if I pulled you off and had you sleep on the floor instead.” With the click of your tongue, he chortles. You bet your ass I would. “So, I decided to have ya sleep on me while I watch TV.”
“What’s wrong with the other side of the couch? It’s quite vacant and enough for a big guy like you.” 
“True,” his hand rubs circles on your back, an old habit he did when he used to have you like this. “But then I’d be lonely.” 
You titter. “That’s big for someone who said he thrives on being alone.”
“I thrive being alone when I’m working.” You’re glad he can’t see your eyes roll; he’d probably grab you by the cheeks like a child. “Besides, why would I wanna be alone when I have you for myself.”
And there it is, your cheeks begin to warm up. Or was it because you’re so close to him that his heat is transferring to you? That’s probably it, yeah. Let’s change the subject…”How long was I out for? I remember the kids left around 7:30-ish.”
“Mmm, it’s going to eleven right now.”
Three and a half hours? Damn. “It’s past their bedtime.”
Toji scoffs. The abrupt motion of his chest rising is satisfying in a way that makes you even more comfortable. “You still think they’re gonna sleep with all that sweet shit they got?” He snickers some more as you shake your head.
“They know better. When you guys get home, be sure to put their candy bags on the top shelf of the closet for the morning.” 
“Still traumatized from that one time?” 
“Uhhh, yes??” The memory flashes to you for a quick moment, but the dread from before still haunts you. Megumi was six years old and Tsumiki seven, returning home from trick-or-treating and immediately tasting their labor from that night. However, what you didn’t expect was for them both to eat almost half their bags. Let’s just say, thanks to their sugar rushes, they didn’t drop dead until the hour hand touched two of the morning. “Unless it’s the weekend, never again.”
The way the older man chuckles is so therapeutic — it nearly makes you want to fall asleep again. “You weren’t the one chasin' Megumi all over the place tryin' to get him to sleep. Little squirt gets his speed from me.”
“Awww, poor you~” You can sense the glare as you respond in a condescending, sing-song tune. “You and him are always butting heads. Like father, like son.”
“Tch, hate that sayin’ so fuckin’ much.”
“Why? ‘Because it’s true?”
“Shut up.” The hand he used to rest his head comes down to pinch your nose. You wriggle out of his hold with giggles, but he happily keeps you grounded to him with his stronghold and a leg wrapped around to prevent yours from moving. “He only listens to you. Such a sweet lil’ baby to you, huh? Puttin’ my own son against me.”
More giggles prompt out of tiny guilt, and you bring up a hand to rub on his chest. “He’s such a bright boy now. Growing up so big and fast.”
“Miki, too. That girl is way too smart fr' me to catch up. And she’s becoming so kind and strong, crazy to think she made me play teacups when she could barely go down the stairs by herself.” Toji hums, the vibrations felt on the pads of your fingers. “Think she gets that from you.” 
You shook your head. “They’re your babies. They do amazing things because they have a big guy like you to catch them if they ever fall.”
“Hmm, fair…But let’s not pretend I’m the best dad in the world. Fuck, never in my life did I think I’d be a dad, especially with two kids. I didn’t know shit back then — still! I still don’t know shit.” You don’t say anything, just listening to him voice his thoughts to you. Because he knows you’d listen – you always do. “If you weren’t there for them, I don’t think they’d be shining like this. Y’re definitely the thing that brought us up together. They look up to you so much. Ya did so well with them.”
Nodding aimlessly, his black sweatshirt grazing on your cheek. “Thank you. Same to you. Didn’t do so bad yourself, big guy.”
“Mmm.”
Nothing is said between you two after that. The only thing that makes noise is the voices coming from the television. The volume lowered, an initiative you could guess from Toji wanting you to get some rest. The silence was too awkward that it might torture some, but it was fine where it was. There was no need to change it, especially when you were comfortable in each other’s embrace.
That is, until Toji asks, “Do you miss it?” The rubs on your back go slower, his fingertips drawing a ticklish sensation.
“Of course I do. All the time.” You answer honestly, turning your head to rest your chin on him. Your eyes glimpse directly at his, giving him a tiny grin. “Why ask? I know the kids miss me being around; what about you? Miss me nagging and putting you to work all the time?”
He sneers at your comment. “Every day.”
It was such a simple answer, yet it had the power to wipe that smirk right off your face. Your eyes locked in his sight, and your heart tuning to an irregular rhythm. Oh, come on, Y/n, get a grip! “Ahem—Toji, I hope you know that I never stopped missing everything we had — I never will. Those years that we shared were probably the best I’ve had. We had happy moments, others sad, of course. But, God, do I miss it all. I miss it so much. I miss having you guys here. Miki and Gumi and—“
“Me?” Good Lord, if this man doesn’t stop looking at you with those goddamn eyes of his, such captivating orbs that say more than he lets on. Your breath hitches, and so does the hand on your back. “Hmm? Ya miss me, baby?”
Oh, for fuck’s sake. Why’d you have to call me that? And it gets worse when he places his free hand on your cheek, his thumb brushing your skin while the forefinger teases the lobe and tragus of your ear. Goddammnit…
“...Yes,” your voice was down a whisper, which could easily be mistaken with the television. But you know Toji heard you, loud and clear. “Especially you, Toji.” You said it. The words that he wanted to hear from you. They felt so forbidden to say, yet it was the truth. You avert your gaze away from him. But you knew that wouldn’t work, not right now. Toji taps your cheek with his thumb, and your eyes sheepishly return to his.
He doesn’t say anything, and that makes your heart beat at an unbearable rate. It’s all you can hear when you stare into his deep emerald eyes, the sound of it ringing your eardrums as if you could puke. Your throat running dry, so you gulp to ease the uncomfortable bob. If something could just happen to end this anxious torture, that would be great. 
And then your prayers get answered: something does happen. Toji slowly brings his face closer to yours — your body goes rigid, and you instantly face away before the inevitable happens. No, I didn’t mean that!
“Aht aht, don’t do that, baby.” His hand slithers from your cheek to your chin, forcing you to face straight at him. “Lemme see you.”
“Toji, wait,” your voice travels out in a shaky breath. “We shouldn’t be doing this. We can’t cross this line anymore.”
He listens to your pleas, but his body does otherwise. Placing a gentle kiss on your forehead while the hand on your back snakes downward. “Why not?” His gruff voice dialed down to a whisper.
“Because—Mmmm…” Toji interrupts you by licking the helix of your ear. Oh, you slick bastard. “We’re supposed to be done…” 
“That’s not stoppin’ me from takin’ care of my sweet thing.” Jesus Christ, you almost melted from the way he whispered that to your ear. He’s pulling out all the same old tricks, and it gets more hellish by the second as you try not to give in. “So, y're gonna let me take care of you like I always do, right, mama?”
Both his hands now rest on your ass, groping it while your hips sway as if they have a mind of their own. The leg between yours comes up slightly, making you ride on it. The heat on your cheeks has already blossomed to your ears, making it hard to think straight. Gripping his sweatshirt, your hips ride his thigh to ease the throbbing sensation that grows with every motion. Good God, you shouldn’t be doing this. You know you shouldn’t be doing this. However, it’s been so long that you felt wanted like this — wanted by him. It’s all the same – his voice, his hands, his words, his body, and the names he calls – yet here you are turning into putty. 
“Haaahh, Mmmfff…Toji, please,” Toji withdraws his face from your shoulder, leaving him to examine your expression. You must look so dumb right now, with your hooded eyes and shivering lips. But, at this point, do you even care? “Please…Treat me right.”
One moment, you see his gaze narrow with a devious glint. Next, you’re taken aback when Toji slams his lips on yours, kissing and sucking your bottom lip until you give him access. With a moan, you open your mouth for him and sink deeper into the kiss. Your hands come around his neck, keeping him focused on you and you alone. Not that he would have it any other way.
His strong hands continue to knead your asscheeks while you hump and grind on his thigh. Nibbling on your lip, you whimper helplessly for him. It strokes his ego, knowing he’s making you like this, the fucking bastard. He takes in your tiny cries happily, shoving his tongue to play with yours. You give in to him, almost losing your balance riding his thigh, yet Toji’s lips never leave yours.
You break the kiss to get an imperative breath, panting loudly and sweetly for him as Toji kisses and licks your ear. The sounds make your lower region twitch. “Hnnmm, fuck…That’s my girl. So fuckin’ good fr’ me always, Y/n…” You can feel him slide a hand up to the hem of your leggings, forcing it inside for his thick fingers to brush up on the bare flesh of your butt. You gasp sharply. Him squeezing your butt has you biting down on his sweatshirt. “—Hahhh, Oh God, Toji,” With every squeeze, he inches closer to your panty-covered chasm, where you know he’d find a damp spot. Please touch me. Please, please, plea—
CLACK-CLINK!!
The two of you are frozen stiff when you hear the sound of the door opening and closing, the foyer lights turned on. “Alright~, we got you guys home. See ya later!” That was Gojo’s voice, indicating everyone was finally back from trick-or-treating. This means that Tsumiki and Megumi are about to see you on top of their father, his hand in your leggings and smacking lips with yours. Your eyes shoot wide with horror — immediately remove yourself from Toji and stand up from the couch to pull your bottoms up. You barely had the chance to peek at Toji because the kids already run to the living room to find you two.
“Y/n, Y/n, look!” The brunette was the first to greet you with her adorable pink Barbie cowgirl costume. She and her brother, dressed as Sasuke Uchiha, cheerfully showcased their pillowcases full of candy. “Look at all this candy we got!”
“Wooow, you guys really went on a haul,” you can only hope they can’t see you sweating bullets through your fake reaction. “Wh–Where’s Gojo?” 
“He dropped us off here a few seconds ago and left for the party,” The raven-haired boy answered while scanning his pillowcase.
You only nod along until you frantically wipe your mouth, realizing the tiny trail of spit from the corner of your mouth. “Umm—Ahem, well then, I’m glad you two got all that candy. Now, let’s hurry up and get you guys home so you can get ready for school tomorrow!” 
But the children didn’t move an inch. Actually, they looked like they were going to tell you something. You lift a brow. Oh no, they’re going to look at each other. They looked at each other and then glanced back at you. Oh, God, no. “Uhhh, Y/n, we were thinking.” Big sister Tsumiki is always the one who asks the following question. “Can we stay over?”
You inhale a massive breath, yet you do your best not to exhale a heavy sigh. “Kids, you promised to keep the overnight stays to three at max per month. This will be the fifth!” 
“Yeah, but it’s dark out. Plus, it’s way past our bedtime.” The younger chimes in with a tiny pout. “We’ll be asleep by the time Dad gets us home.”
And here comes Tsumiki with the tag-team response to add on. “And that means he’ll have to make continuous trips back and forth from the car. Picking me and Megumi up, getting our bookbags, the bags full of candy, the whole thing! We already packed up our PJs just in case.” 
You stood there staring at the two in astonishment. There’s no way they thoroughly planned this out. There’s just no way… And to make it worse, they were making valid arguments. You open your mouth to say something, but the two give the best puppy eyes they can. The wave of guilt hits like a train, internally cringing. You turn to Toji, who still sits on the couch, and the motherfucker only gives you a shrug. Wow, what a helpful father he is.
You groan into your hands, shaking your head while looking at the kids who wait for your verdict. “…Alright, you can stay as long as you PROMISE to put those candy bags in my bedroom closet. Deal?” The happy smiles and aggressive head shakes should answer your question. “Good, now go ahead and take your showers before you head for bed.” They rushed to the stairs by the time you finished that sentence, so enthusiastic about staying the night at your house, and you can’t help but smile hearing their footsteps run up the stairs. 
With that being said, you turn to the older man again. Your brows are trenched down, but your smile is still present. “So, you legit just sat there and let those two tag-team me like that? In my own house?”
Another shrug with a dumb smirk on his handsome face. “Told you: too smart fr’ me to catch up.” You shake your head before exiting to get the kids and guest rooms ready, leaving him with the television. 
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
The midnight hour has finally danced its way into the darkness of the night. Halloween is finally over, and the month of October is no more. The pitter-patter sound of the rain cleanses the neighborhood of its merits and festivities that partook hours ago, ready for a new phase of the year to take over.
After having the guest room ready with sheets and sleepwear for Toji and kissing the kids goodnight, you rinse your stress off with a nice shower and put on your pajamas to get ready for bed. After you turn the lights off, you drape the comforter over your figure as your body sinks with the cozy sheets and pillowcase. Your eyes close while focusing on the curtains of your window, the only light piercing inside being the lampposts by the street. 
…Well, at least that’s what’s supposed to happen. But that’s not the case because you’re not the only one lying comfortably on your mattress. Instead, Toji is here with you, in your room, on your bed, his chest to your back, and his hand roaming inside your oversized shirt. Your lips are now connected with his, sharing your erotic moans with his enticing groans, and you get a little louder as his fingers cup and play with your breast.
“Mmphh…Ahhhh, I thought I told you you’re sleeping in the guest room—Nmmff!” He tweezes your nipple with his forefinger and thumb roughly.  
“And I thought you’d be smart enough to know that wasn’t gonna happen.” Toji kisses the crook of your neck, drawing near your ear for him to whisper. “Besides, look at you. Still sleepin’ with no underwear on?”
“Hmph, only when I have a man around the house.” That answer got you another rough tweak on your nip and a purposeful gnaw to your ear. You knew he’d react like that, never liking the mention of another man leaving your mouth – especially during an intimate time like this.
“That so? What man you know that can handle all this?” Toji then moves from his side to be between your legs, pulling up your shirt to fully expose your chest. And your breathe hitches while his free hand travels down your abdomen to your bottoms.
“Ahhhh, no one. Just you...” You look at him with half-lidded eyes, taking in his reaction to what you said. The salacious grin on his face becoming broader should entail that he greatly loved that retort.
He brings his face to your other unattended nipple, “Good answer, princess.” The nub of your breast enters his mouth, and the wet warmth of his tongue greets it with lapped motions and grazes from his teeth. Despite that, it doesn’t distract you from the fact your bottoms are pulled down with ease and are thrown to the bedroom floor, leaving your cunt out for him, your erotic fluids seeping and glistening from the outside lights. 
Toji plays with your folds until he can stuff his pointer finger into your chasm, the insertion resulting in your body’s jolt. It’s been a long while since you had his thick digit inside you, playing and scraping the inner walls to evoke whimpers. God, it felt so good, this satisfying feeling returning to awaken your body to his touch. He interacts with your body as if he’s the only person who knows how to get you going – and it’s the truth. No one can put you in a blissful haze quicker than this man. And you’d prefer to keep it that way. 
The addition of his middle finger into your leaky entrance startles you, the thick digit making its way in with such vigor that he uses both fingers to scrape the velvety texture of your walls. Your eyes are now screwed shut at the growing commotion between your thighs, and the heat within your body flourishing all around gets to your head. “—Khmm, Oh fuuck, Toji. Please, don’t stop.” 
With a soft ‘pop’ noise from his lips, Toji replies to your demands. “I’m sorry, what’s my name again?” You giggle with trenched brows. Of course, how could I forget?
“Nmmph, D-Daddy, pleaseee, I’m so clo—Ahhhann!!” He puts his thumb to your clit, grinding down on it unexpectedly. “I wanna cum, pleaseee…”
“Hmmm, good girl,” he teased, laying down kisses, nibbling on the skin of your stomach and inner thighs until he arrives at your leaking slit. Your body jerks up from the bed when you feel the cold, wet muscle slowly lick on your clitoris before ravaging your folds. The sounds of his mouth on your cunt are so lewd to the ear, slurping noises from his lips with the lapping motions of his tongue claiming your come are too much for you. And when he uses his hand to swipe and pinch your clit? Oh, it’s a wrap. Your release comes out without control, biting down on your bottom lip to make sure your cries don’t leave this space for the kids to hear. Their room is on the other side down the hall; tonight isn’t the night for too many risks.
When your trembling body calms down and subsides, Toji withdraws his face from between your thighs. Your essence paints his mouth, and he wipes his chin clean while licking the remnants that coat his scarred lips. “Hmph, missed tastin’ you like that.” You open your eyes when your high finally evades you, watching your ex-husband pull down his sweats. His erection springs out and hits his stomach, your mind going rampant with thoughts as you ogle at his freed limb. Shit, it’s been so long. Will that shit even fit me again?
“Don’t think it’ll fit, baby?” Damn him, he loves teasing you. Toji then discards his black wife-beater, at long last revealing his well-built, brawny physique that has you drooling for him. He uses his hands to maneuver your legs—your knees pushed to your chest as your legs propped up on his shoulders. A position you’re all too familiar with. Your eyes don’t leave Toji’s cock as he aligns his cock to your slick-coated folds. “Take some breaths fr’ me, sweetie. Can’t take care of you when you’re all tense.”
You take up on his advice and begin taking deep breaths, reminding yourself to maintain the steady pattern as he pushes the tip of his dick between the lips of your cunt. Every inhale is where he nudges into the hole of your inner cavern, and every exhale gives you time to breathe out the pain that comes in for a split second. This carries on until the cockhead wedges itself perfectly into your vagina, along with the inches of his girth that stretches until the base kisses your lips, the tip of him kissing your cervix. Tears swell up in your eyes, taking more deep breaths to prepare yourself for what’s about to come. 
“Oooh fuuuck…Heh, yeah, that’s my baby right there. Fittin’ so perfect fr’ me, mama…” He puts his weight on you, keeping your figure unmoving under his bow. 
“Nmmmf, Daddyyy,” you’re forced to take in all of him, and drool trails down your lips with no hope of taking care of it. “…I’m so full, you’re too much…”
“I know, sweetie, I know.” He wipes your spit after kissing your forehead. How gentle compared to what you’re about to go through. “Gonna move now.” His thrusts start slow for the two of you to adjust to each other; the feeling of his length’s veins coming in and out of your chasm is so euphoric, and the kisses to your cervix want your body to writhe and squirm. But you’re bent into this position for a reason: forced to submit to him no matter what. So you do just that.
Yet your horny haze gets more potent once he picks up the pace, rutting into you with increased speed. Your slit, still sensitive from earlier, gets overstimulated with the constant grazes on your gummy walls and jabs to your tender cervix. It takes everything in your power not to come so early.
“—Hahhhh, Nmmph. Oh, shit, shit, shit…” Toji groans above you, the thrusts of his pelvis increase to an irregular rhythm, grinding deep into your cunt to the point of uncontrollable babbles escaping your lips. His bullying on your insides results in you gripping his length hard, causing the older man to hiss and moan at your contractions. “—Ohhhfuuuckk!! Jesus Christ, baby. Y’re gonna make me go crazy.” 
As if that wasn’t already happening now that he pistons his cock into your wetness, your brain turning into mush from the onslaught of ruts to your puffy wet chasm. Tears stream down your face, and more drool follows down with more precise hits to your delicate canal. The pounding in your head makes it hard to think of anything else, the squelching noises and paps of Toji’s balls hitting your cunt making it worse. 
“D-Daddyyy, I’m—Ohoooo!! Oh, Jesus, ohhhshit!” You can’t formulate a proper sentence, too engulfed with the electrifying sensations coursing through your body. 
“Damn, you feel too fucking good—Hnngh!!” Toji places his forehead on yours, resting his entire weight on you while his hips have a mind of their own. “‘Bout to make me knock you up…”
Oh, good Lord. The mere thought of having a child is the last thing that should be on your mind. But in a time like this, who in their right mind would be thinking straight? “Nnnfff! Oh God, pleaseee, fill me up, Daddyy!” Green eyes narrow with trenched brows. “—Pleasepleasepleaseee!! I want you to fill me up so bad, I want it, I want—Hyaaaaa!!” 
How can he deny your desperate, teary pleas when you’re urging him on like this? “Heh, you’re so fuckin’ sexy, mama.” Toji captures your lips with his, your mewls taken by him as you sink further into your pleasurable thrill.
Sporadic thrusts of his pelvis produce more raunchy noises in the joining of your sexes, his heavy balls smacking on your cunt as he drives the base of his cock straight into you. Your slit is now a puffy mess, come and slick form a soapy mess that Toji now harbors a milky ring around his girth. A few rushed, sloppy thrusts heighten your high once more, and then Toji presses his pelvis down to the hilt on one final, harsh thrust, unloading his seed into your aching folds. And your climax follows in a few seconds, the walls of your cunt fluttering on his pulsating dick as your essence soaks him. Your muffled shrieks are received by him, quivering under him until the aftershocks wash through your body. 
Once you two breathe at a steady tempo and the nerves of your sweaty bodies fall still, the kiss is broken with heavy pants and a string of spit that links you two together. Toji buries his face between your neck and shoulder, licking and kissing your skin as you’re allowed time to experience your clarity.
“Hmmm…You know I’m not done yet, princess.” Toji mumbles to your ear before stationing your legs off his shoulders for them to rest.
“Yeah, I know, big guy.” You tease him with a breathless laugh, kissing him on the temple. “Always wanting more…”
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───
“…So, you’re telling me you had your ex-husband spend the night? Not just the kids?”
“Yup, that’s what happened.” 
This morning was different from your usual routine – well, you can’t say it’s different if you have done it before, huh? After five years of divorce, you thought you’d be so used to waking up and getting ready for work without worrying about others. However, this morning proves otherwise.
It felt natural walking into the kids’ room and lightly shaking them awake, telling them to get ready while you whip up something quick for them to eat as Toji showers (using your bathroom, by the way). Watching the kids run down the stairs and eat breakfast puts a smile on your face, reminiscing about the good old days when they were younger and teenier. It sometimes feels surreal doing the same thing for them now that they’re getting older and taller. But seeing them bicker and interact with each other in your presence never fails to warm your heart.
When Toji’s finished freshening up and loading his kids’ stuff in his truck, it’s time to bid them farewell for their departure for school. You give them final touch-ups on their hair and outfits, reminding them to be safe and not get into trouble (especially Megumi, now that the boy’s been getting into fights). And before they rush to the car, you hug them and give each a kiss on the cheek. Here is where the warm feeling inside your heart begins to deteriorate, not wanting to let them go. Yet, for their sake – and education – you release them and hope for the best.
The last to leave was Toji, who came from the kitchen to the front door with a paper plate wrapped in foil in one hand. His name is written boldly by a black Sharpie. “This fr' me?” 
“No, it’s for Shiu Kong, for dealing with you all the time.” You stick your tongue out at Toji as he glares at you, not even moving out of the way while he exits through the door. “You better eat that when you get to work, you have a terrible habit of skipping lunch.” 
“Whatever ya say, mom.” He pesters you with the title, knowing you’re technically not a mother anymore. Yet it only makes you smile knowing he notices your maternal side. 
“Don’t forget to text me when Tsumiki’s soccer game is next week.” You watch him go down the porch stairs. 
“Will do.”He whistles. 
“And Toji?”
The man stops walking to turn to you, his forest green eyes fixed on you so quickly that you almost forget what you want to say. Or what you wanted to do. You place your fingers on your lips and blow a kiss with an outward gesture. It was an old habit you did whenever he left, something you can’t seem to get out of practice with. It’s embroidered in your mind at this point. 
And when he catches the kiss with his free hand and places it on his chest, it makes your heart skip a beat. Toji grins, “I’ll be damned if that was fr' Shiu, too.”
You snicker with a shaken head. “Drive safe, Toji.” Closing the front door, you stand there for a while. Your smile doesn’t falter; it gets bigger as you replay the moment instead. Thinking about him, hearing him, seeing him, it all drives you crazy. And that’s a good thing…right?
“I don’t know, sounds like you still kinda care about the guy.” 
“Of course I do,” So here you are, sitting in your living room enjoying the rays of the sunset decorating the space, in a video call with your best friends, Utahime and Mei Mei. You reply to the former’s comment. “Just because I don’t have the ring on my finger doesn’t mean I shouldn’t care about him. I mean, he’s the father of two lovely children.”
“Shoot, you’re better than me, then.” The dark-haired woman admits. “But you’re kinda proving my point, Y/n. Even when you don’t have the ring on, you two act like the same old couple, and it’s definitely not just for the kids’ sake. Let’s be real here.” 
You try to interject, but the pale-blue-haired other, Mei Mei, intervenes, “I agree. It’s one thing if you let the children stay over, but he also wanted to spend the night. Sure, he could’ve been tired from driving all day and such. However, if you’re still seeing a man for the last five years – while legally unbound – and he says he wants to spend the night under your roof, which is rare, that should ring some bells at least.”
“I know, it did…” you nod along with what your friend is saying, throwing your head back with a heavy sigh. “But it’s not like he’s never spent the night here before, nor is he banished from stepping inside.” 
“Oh? Then why is this time different from the others?”
Utahime jumps in after Mei Mei’s chirp. “Yeah, you’re telling us about all these nostalgic lovey-dovey feelings as if you’re falling in love with him all over again. What, did you two have sex or something?” 
An open mouth, yet no words come out, leaving you in a predicament. You could’ve just lied or swerved the subject to something else. But you didn’t. And the two women on the screen lift their brows with hooded eyes, a look meaning a thousand words. You couldn’t even explain yourself either because a sudden knock on your door captured the attention of all three of you. 
You stand up and walk towards the door, your friends still on call on the phone at hand. Opening the door, you’re almost stunned to see in front of you. Tsumiki and Megumi with nervous smiles, and their father at the car collecting the same duffles bags from last night. You’re kidding.
“Hey, kids.” The two of them gulped from not calling them by their names. You bring up the phone to face the screen to them. “Say hello to Auntie Mei Mei and Utahime.” The women on the line smile and wave at the children, who sheepishly wave back.
“Hi, aunties.” Megumi greets them, and then his eyes drift back to you. “So, Y/n—“
“What did you forget this time?” Straight to the point, no room for excuses.
“It was Miki this time! She forgot her soccer cleats.” The older sibling gawks at her younger brother for calling her out.
“Tsumiki, I know you have cleats at home.”
“I do, but these are special! You bought them for my birthday, and I’ve been wearing them to every game ever since! So, I was scared when I couldn’t find them at home.” The brunette was quick to defend her stand. “Also, Dad doesn’t feel like driving up here and then back. So…can we…”
You close your eyes and bring the phone to your face to shield your vexation. Twice in a row, the sixth time this month. You can hear the giggles of your friends from the other side of the phone, adding more fuel to the fire. You don’t look up until you hear heavy footsteps on the porch, seeing Toji holding both duffle bags with a hand and shoulder. He stares at you as you stare at him, a silent conversation on how to handle this situation. And when he shrugs with lifted brows, you realize it’s no use and release the long-awaited sigh.
“….If I see one more thing being left behind here, you guys can’t come back till December, understand?” It wasn’t anything serious, but enough for the kids to know you weren’t joking. They nod their heads in unison while you roll your eyes. “Okay, get in here.” They rushed inside with gleeful laughs, the shuffling of their backpacks following along with them. Your eyes then drift to Toji as he walks up to you. “Did you forget something here, too?”
“Yeah,” you lift a brow when he drops Megumi’s bag to the floor. Before you can register his hand on your chin, you squeak when he brings his lips to yours. It lasted for seconds, but the kiss was sweet and tender, sucking on your lip before letting go with a playful bite. “Meant to give you that when you woke up. Thanks fr' the food, mama.” 
Toji picks the bag up and walks inside your home to put the bags in the rooms, leaving you standing on the porch with an astounded expression. You couldn’t appropriately calibrate your thoughts until you heard faint laughs from the phone. Then, you realize your best friends witnessed the entire scene that transpired. 
Utahime, with the slyest leer, was the first to say something. “Oh yeah, he laid that pipe on you good, without a doubt.”
“Mhmm,” Mei Mei agrees with a chuckle. “And I'm guessing he’s gonna do it again tonight. Isn’t that right, Y/n?”
You end the video call with a heated face. “Sh-Shut your damn mouths!!” Again, you groan into your hands before returning inside. Thank God I still have those birth control pills...
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♱ 𝐌𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭
© 𝐇𝐨𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐲2023 – reblogs + comments are appreciated wholeheartedly ☆ header art by rororogi mogera + dividers by the amazing @/cafekitsune!!
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kidrat · 1 year ago
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having feelings about trans Gwen,,, like there's the 'superhero leading a double life' allegory for being closeted, which ppl have noted, but there's plenty I haven't seen anyone mention yet! like, the fact her dad has a trans patch in support of her means she's out.
She's a young trans *girl* (as opposed to a trans woman) living as her authentic gender in a loving home. she went to her school dance in a dress. she did ballet! which of course boys can do too, but often times when people are assigned male they don't get the chance to explore feminine hobbies. It's really lovely that someone, likely Gwen's dad, supported her enough to let her have those girly experiences and memories, whether she was living as a girl when she took dance up or as a gnc boy.
While it's subtle rep, I still think it's awesome to imply a character like Gwen is trans. Trans girls don't always get to have a childhood. Transmisogyny fetishizes transfems and presents them as always victimisers, never victims. They're barred from girlhood and it's connotations of innocence, vulnerability, lovableness.
Not that Gwen isn't a hashtag strong female character! And not that she hasn't had to grow up fast in other ways. She Is Literally Spiderwoman and she plays the drums and has agency and expresses negative emotions. But she's also a teenager, and she gets to be hugged and comforted, and to be set up for a soft friends to lovers relationship with another teenager, a cis boy who respects her and only knows her as a girl and thinks she's amazing and draws her in his sketchbook. That is not a role the media often lets trans girls have!!! It's lovely to think young transfems might be able to see themselves in a character consistently shown as worthy of affection.
Of course, the fact that Gwen is in the closet about being spider-woman is even sadder knowing this is her second rodeo. Lots of us have hesitated to come out a second time because our parents were supportive about the first thing and well, putting something else on them feels like taking the piss or hoping for too much.
Something else I wanted to talk about is how Gwen being trans effects a reading of her Peter's death, especially taking into account the new information this film gave us about this. There's this gendered switch happening, where Peter passes on his usual role to a woman. What's more, he has to die for her story to happen. She loves him, and never wanted him to die, but she's blamed for it anyway. Her father talks affectionately about the dead Peter, calling him his daughter's best friend. He talks about him like a son. He vows revenge on Gwen for killing him. It's a fantastic allegory for how some transphobic parents hate their out trans children for 'killing' the kid they had before.
I think with the above in mind, maybe we can see the subtext of Gwen's arc with her dad in this film as that of a supportive parent who's nevertheless got some biases left that hurt his trans daughter, who doesn't speak up for fear his acceptance is conditional.
I don't think it's a stretch to suggest that protecting a trans daughter is this Captain Stacy's motivation while he's working as a cop. Obviously there's the text that he wants to be a 'good cop' to work against the institution's bigotry, and he displays the trans flag on his work jacket. His quitting the police is a fantastic story beat because it makes a point about the real world while also serving a lot of the analogies going on.
Good cops quit. They realise you can't be a well intentioned cog in a bigoted machine. It doesn't matter if you're a bigot or just taking actions a bigot might because you're working within parameters set by bigots. It's an important message. Within a trans reading of the film, I'd also see this plot moment as Stacy realising he can't protect his trans daughter if he's still playing by the rules of a society that see her as threatening and duplicitous. He's then able to stop seeing her on some level as having killed his son.
They're able to be close again because he has completely rejected the cis culture he was a part of, rather than just decrying the worst parts and slotting Gwen in. She no longer has to worry that he'll rescind his acceptance if she's too trans, and so he gets to know all of her because she can let him into her world without self-editing.
Anyway, those are my thoughts on Gwen after watching Across The Spiderverse two hours ago lmao.
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black-lake · 2 years ago
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astro observations 8
though most of us think we've learned everything about our own chart, yea we’ve seen it countless times, yet we're always learning new things because we go through experiences that activate and awaken certain parts we either forgot about or overlooked. I shared many of my personal experiences in this post of things I realized later or thought were insignificant.
——
🎻 People with capricorn placements tend to be remembered fondly after their death. The type of artists that listening to their music takes you to a different era and makes you feel nostalgic to a time period you never existed in. They also can easily bring old trends, styles or music genres back to life. Signs that are also remembered after death are aquarius and pisces. I always notice it with those last three signs or degrees of these signs.
🎻 It is said that the moon matures at 24°, so I got a degree observation with that. If you have it at 24° or close to it, 23° or 22°, you may feel like you've experienced the full spectrum of emotions and matured so much in your early 20s. In your childhood and teenage years, you may remember dealing with emotions immaturely, possibly acting out with the negative traits of the moon sign. At 24, you feel more aware and in control of your emotions, like you ended a cycle. Your emotional intelligence becomes evident. The emotional world of these natives is almost entirely internal. They do best when they can deal with their emotions in solitude. They're seen as detached no matter how open they get. They keep people guessing what they're feeling and they tend to have a wise aura.
🎻 With moon at degrees from 25° to 29°, natives may feel like they need to share their emotions with either someone close or the world in general, or even through a hobby they have. They may want to be vocal and expressive about how they feel. They tend to be relatable and make others feel heard through just expressing themselves and being open. They may also experience some heartbreaks, making them stronger, braver and and more willing to share how they feel. 
🎻 Moon at degrees from 0° to 21° tend to resonate very much with the sign of their moon degree. They might even be mistaken as having their moon in the the sign of that degree. They're seen as energetic and youthful. They often go through trials and errors in testing their emotional depth. They may have been adventurous growing up, experimenting with things and testing where they feel safest and most secure. They may cling into things, and can be codependent on others. They learn how to develop a sense of detachment as they reach their 20s.
^ if you have your moon at 0° to 21°, which I'm least familiar with cuz I don't meet many ppl with these degrees, please do tell me how it resonates with you and your experience with your moon.
🎻 I noticed that most iconic artists have significant uranus or neptune aspects in their chart, conjunction and oppositions with personal planets in particular. I associate these two planets with artistic abilities and talents. Both give visionary minds and expand the imagination. They are outer and generational planets, so whatever art these ppl create is impactful and undeniably timeless. 
🎻 Your first love or just the person you first felt really intimately connected to may have placements or degrees of the sign of your 8th house. I have an 8th house in capricorn and my first love had a cap sun and stellium and an aqua stellium. 
🎻 In my experience the 8th house is more important in relationships than the 7th. To me the 7th is about connections in general. Even though I have sag in the 7th and pluto right there, I obvs anticipated a significant relationship with a sag or something but it never happened lol. I end up having a casual and lighthearted connection with them, the traits they embody compliments my rising and it's an easy going connection that stays in the friend zone. Not with cap men, even if I want to be friends with them, there's tension that either drifts us apart fearing the friendship or it instantly develops to an intense relationship. It's because my 8th house is in capricorn, and my pluto and mars are both at 10°. So check the degrees too.
🎻 For the longest time I resonated with being way more plutonian than saturnian, because I don't have any capricorn placements or significant saturn aspects, but so many obvious plutonian aspects. But once saturn hit the highest point in my chart, conjuncting my mc, I realized how much this planet affected my life all along and I was oblivious. For instance, I have so many capricorn degrees and sun in the 10th. I was overlooking that I have capricorn in the 8th and 9th, which means saturn rules both houses, and it rules the 10th too since it's in aquarius plus at 22°. I also have a stellium in the 11th with saturn right at the cusp there, so it even influences the the house that is most active in my chart. Can't wait for saturn 11th transit 💀
🎻 Speaking of that, if you have sun in the 10th house, you probably try hard not to look or sound arrogant because people tend to think you're confident even if you're not. Whenever you speak people listen and others may hate on you for thinking you're better than them and you don't even know them lol. It's so hard to make friends with this but I don't hate it, because it gives me the strategic ways to be persuasive and get my way with authority figures. May apply to leo in the 10th or people with cap/leo mix (I bet y'all were called arrogant at least once lol).
🎻 As someone that is very influenced by pluto (square sun, trine venus, semi-sextile mars, conjunct chiron, opposite ascendant, quintile mc), I painfully understand how plutonians feel like their struggles are never rewarded, at least not the reward they anticipated. Yknow with saturn you go through hardship you learn this and that and you get tangible fucking results that you can fucking see. With pluto what is it again? your inner strength and eventual realization of "ta-daaa you went through it, you thought you couldn’t.. that's the reward". Plutonians out there waiting to be truly happy, truly loved, truly effing rich 💀 and get a damn break. 
🎻 Another aspect I overlooked was mars opposite saturn, just because I have it at 10°, but I experienced every single thing related to this aspect. I feel like I learned so much about it the hard way and I wanted to do a post sharing what I learned with people that got mars-saturn harsh aspects. If you have it, your flow of energy may be a little off, not knowing when to STOP doing a task and when to start again. Being stubborn with your work wanting it to be done instantly and perfectly like your body is some type of machine taking orders, but saturn will put obstacles in your way until you learn patience and contentment. Can be harder to deal with if mars is in a fixed or cardinal sign.
🎻 With mars-saturn harsh aspects, you may feel the urge to act on your martian qualities but if you disregard what saturn is there for, you'll find yourself back at square one. It's about listening to your body and not ignoring your physical and mental exhaustions. Taking short breaks and organizing your time instead of giving up all together in rage. You're not running out of time if you do so, in fact pushing through too hard is what's a waste of time. It's not a wise use of energy because your work won't be as efficient and your perfectionist ass will redo it. If there's an absence of a healthy work-life balance, these natives can internalize a tremendous amount of anger that can be detrimental to their health. 
🎻 I always laugh at capricorns saying that capricorn is a cursed sign because it's so true but also absolutely untrue at the same time. 💀 These natives need to understand certain life patterns, qualities and duties that once figured out unlocks so much success and tangible results that are long lasting. Cap placements especially sun and stelliums give me the sense that they inherited some of their ancestors qualities, if you believe in that, but they go through some hardships with the patterns that come with these qualities. They have a choice to cut the patterns that don't serve them, whether in behaviors or ways of thinking and utilise what they already have with persistence and strategy. 
🎻 Well it's march already, who's excited for a little pluto break? It's finally leaving capricorn and entering aquarius on the 23rd and I can't wait tbh. It's like a more intense uranus in aquarius transit, yes we will see a new sense of freedom, some drastic changes, and some said authentic people popping up, new sources of income, new values that aren't necessarily money related, systems that aren't as controlling, maybe new communities or apps on the internet that are annoyingly trendy. But with pluto we will see the shadow side of all of that, so buckle up and get ready lol. It's a gradual change tho I don't expect much to happen this year, but we can always be shocked. Also side thought, if your kids are gonna have pluto in aquarius they may be even brattier and harder to control than pluto sag gen. 
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meanbossart · 9 months ago
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i always love asking ppl this; how does your character (du drow) see themselves .vs. how they are seen by others (loved ones, friends, acquaintances, etc)
That is a good question!
When it comes to his self-perception, DU Drow assumes he cuts a very intimidating and off-putting figure at worst - and someone impressive and powerful at best.; he doesn't care either way as long as it favors him in either being left alone or getting what he wants out of people. He believes himself to appear confident and as having little regard for other people besides for his tight-knit group of friends and partner. He does believe that he's reliable - and even caring, as weirdly as he may express it. Not particularly intelligent but not dense enough to seem like an idiot. When it comes to more complex stuff - his needs, wants, beliefs, and how that comes across - his self-understanding is extremely lacking and vague. He doesn't have much of a point of comparison, however, so he doesn't really grapple with that.
When it comes to strangers (at least on the surface) he is pretty much right that he comes across as a scary, powerful person. Funnily enough, in the Underdark he is way less impressive to most of the population - a strange sight nonetheless, but his tactics don't work as well on it's citizens. Most drow don't know what to make of him, and generaly don't take him seriously or assume him to be half-something else or even not a drow at all.
(Shadowheart's and Astarion's POVs below, NOTE: these are based on what their relationships are like at the end-game/post-game, obviously there would be some significant differences if we were to talk about first-impressions and so on)
Shadowheart, being his closest friend, sees DU drow as kind of a doofus. She understands him as an animal with simple motivations and impulses, and has no real interest in pushing him to be anything else - in fact she envies how simplistically DU drow seems to view life and every hurdle that it throws his way, and looks up to him for seeming largely unaffected by his circumstances and unburdened by the things he has done/have happened to him. She does think he's a very fun person to be around - and someone she can say anything to and trust him to tell her exactly whats on his mind back, and generally tell her to pull herself by the bootstraps instead of letting her wallow in misery - she has overall a lot of respect and appreciation for the guy, though she doesn't express it too often since she thinks his ego is inflated enough. She isn't afraid or unnerved by him in the slightest and is kind of amused at how much other people are - she pretty much forgets that he looks like a freak.
As his romantic partner, Astarion's perception on him is fairly different. He thinks a bit more highly of Du drow's intellect than it probably appears, and finds it frustrating that he guy just doesn't seem to want to entertain a lot of... Thinking. He knows he can be perceptive and insightful based on how he treats him, but for whatever reason never applies that to himself, and the more they grow to know each other the more he thinks it's just a barrier DU drow has set up so he doesn't have to grapple with the things he's done and what he is. He is under no illusions that DU drow isn't a egoistical, blood-thirsty person (he likes those things about him, anyway) but worries that one day something will click in his brain, and all that willful ignorance will culminate into something terrible. He also thinks DU drow is a far more empathetic person than himself.
He really likes DU drow's company for his unfiltered demeanor - he thinks he's funny and a good listener (lol) and finds a lot of comfort in being with someone who seems incapable of hiding how they feel about him and their relationship, and doesn't think DU drow has much capacity for being manipulative or deceptive. Naturally he adores how much DU drow seems willing to devote himself to him, but it bothers him that it sometimes seem to veer into weird, damsel-in-distress-fantasy territory. Basically there's a lot about the guy that Astarion both likes and doesn't simultaneously.
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fixing-bad-posts · 9 months ago
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Heya, I really really hope this doesn't come off as particularly rude, but I was wondering, why would bisexual women be considered lesbians sometimes and I think you also brought up transgender men and genderqueer ppl? For bisexual women, I just am kinda confused, they can be in lesbian relationships and lesbian spaces, but just describing them as lesbians seems kinda confusing because lesbian denotes specifically sapphic attraction at least from where I've always heard it, so wouldn't it be kinda confusing. And for the genderqueer folks or trans folks, wouldn't that just bring their genders closer to feminine and at least from what I've heard from some pple I know, they don't like non binary being seen as more womanly (I've heard it being described as woman-lite before annoying) and instead seen as a more inbetween which it sometimes isn't, because of bigotry and other things since nbs can be both fem or masc or androgynous, but wouldn't non woman lesbians kinda push it to be seen as kinda more fem or that person as more fem? I don't know and frankly I'm just kinda confused. I'm really really sorry that this probably comes off as super rude and I hope you forgive me. I frankly just want to learn a little more and have been reading up but wanted to know what you thought. And I just realized how long this was, so so sorry
hello anon! these days, i usually don’t answer asks like these because i’ve already done so several times, but you seem very well-meaning and confused, so i’ll do my best to help. first of all, please check my faq for resources and links about mspec labels and bi lesbians.
second of all—generally—here is my advice for when you encounter a queer label that confuses you:
1) literally just ignore it until you...
2) meet someone in your life who uses that label, at which point you might (respectfully) ask them what using that label means to them specifically, and why it’s important. i’ve done this in real life. the script is something like,
“it’s really cool to get to talk to someone in real life about this stuff—if i may ask, what does identifying as [insert label] mean to you, personally?”
you might also say,
“i’ve never met someone who identifies with [their label] before. would you mind giving me some pointers on the important things to keep in mind in order to respect your identity/make sure you feel respected by me?”
i’ve also never asked anyone to correct me if i mess up and say something rude, but i’m working on the confidence and charisma to be able to say that, because i owe that to others.
all of that said, i wanted to respond to some of your specific questions, and clarify a couple of things below the cut. to clarify:
1. “describing [bisexual women] as lesbians seems kinda confusing because lesbian denotes specifically sapphic attraction”. to be clear i am not the one describing bisexual women as lesbians, in this hypothetical situation. when i post about bi-lesbians, i am posting in support of people who—for whatever reason—chose that label for themselves. what i am not doing: advocating to redefine the classically understood definition of lesbian for the entire populous.
2. “wouldn’t it be kinda confusing”? yes! i understand it can be confusing, and i commend you for expressing your confusion instead of reacting in disgust or anger. there are so many things in the queer community that are confusing, even to me, and you don’t need to feel guilty for asking questions as long as you come from a place of genuine curiosity. being confused isn’t bad, and defining yourself in a way that confuses others is, likewise, no transgression.
3. “for the genderqueer folks or trans folks, wouldn’t [identifying as a lesbian] just bring their genders closer to feminine […] wouldn’t non woman lesbians […] be seen as kinda more fem”? the answer is: sort of. it depends entirely on how and why the person using this label came to these words. you wrote, “i’ve heard from some pple i know, they don’t like non binary being seen as more womanly”, and i have definitely also heard that! so, for people who feel that way, they probably wouldn’t want a label that evokes womanhood and/or aligns them with femininity assigned to them. but every person is different—so for some nonbinary people, they absolutely do not want to be seen as “woman-lite”, whereas for other nonbinary people, they might want to be seen closer to femme than masc, while still nonbinary. this goes back to what i said at the beginning: best practice is to ask the people in your life how they want you to respect them.
closing thoughts: i hope this clarified some things, but i understand that the topic may still be confusing—feel free to message me if you want a non-judgmental queer to talk things through with. i promise i’ll take you in good faith <3
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trapastrology · 7 months ago
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Songs that explain 12H synastry (house pov)
This song explains 12H synastry to a T from the perspective of the house person. Now, there are many different feelings & thoughts that the house person can have. This pov is when the house person is still toxic & scared of surrendering to real love. They tend to self sabotage heavily as well.
Die 4 U- The weeknd
"I'm findin' ways to articulate the feeling I'm goin' through I just can't say I don't love you 'Cause I love you, yeah It's hard for me to communicate the thoughts that I hold But tonight I'm gon' let you know Let me tell the truth"
~The represents the confusion the house person goes thru. They are usually so used to being so closed off to the point where they find it jarring when they start to find themselves feeling these deep & true feelings for the planet person. They also find it hard to express these feelings to the planet person. They are terrified of rejection & getting taken advantage of so even when they feel these feelings & have found a way to articulate them, they'd rather keep it to themselves (which is detrimental to the relationship). This song shows the pov of the house person realizing what they've been doing to sabotage this perfect relationship with the planet person & finally wanting to put all their feelings on display before it's too late & they lose them for good.
"I'm scared that I'll miss you, happens every time I don't want this feelin', I can't afford love I try to find a reason to pull us apart It ain't workin' 'cause you're perfect And I know that you're worth it I can't walk away, oh!"
~This shows how the house person fears vulnerability to the point where they are scared of of even missig the planet person. They are the same ppl who only want true love but at the same time due to what they've been thru they are completely terrified of it. They try to test the planets persons love with ridiculous tests which only tiers the planet. House may try to always look for holes & doubts in the relationship, but they are the ones creating these holes. House starts looking for red flags that aren't even there. & in the end the house person tries to do everything they can to fix the parts of the relationship they can before it's too late
"Even though we're going through it And it makes you feel alone Just know that I would die for you Baby, I would die for you, yeah The distance and the time between us It'll never change my mind, 'cause baby I would die for you"
~When they are having difficulties in the relationship caused by the house person the planet person can indeed feel alone but chooses not to speak about it. Either way it goes, houses feelings are so strong & so pure for the planet that they would kill, steal & lie for them with no hesitation. Most times, they wont even disclose those feelings with the planet person. One day if the time comes the planet sees thru actions how much house truly cares & feels. No matter the circumstances good or bad, the houses feelings rarely change.
"'Cause I can't take this pain forever And you won't find no one that's better 'Cause I'm right for you, babe"
~At the end of the day, the house person thinks (& is most times correct) that no one will love the planet person the way that they do & no one is a better match for them. Most times they just have a bad way of showing it or they choose not to show it at all. They just have to remember that not everyone is their enemy.
~Stay tuned for more stuff like this in my upcoming ebook about the complete ins & outs of synastry! There will be an entire chapter dedicated to dissecting songs from different perspectives of this synastry. Love yall!!!!!!!!
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skribbyposts · 9 months ago
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HELLO AGAIN!!1111!!!! based off of @bidisastersanji's post about Sanji not being able to sit like a normal person (its cause hes a homo). i kind of took the hc and ran w it but thats okay hee hee
Also from Law's pov bc i love him so much and i wanted to try!! hope yall enjoy!!!!!!!!&!%@^#&^(!*#^$W yeah
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Law prides himself on being a very observant person.
It seems he wasn't looking hard enough when he made the mistakes that led him here, sulking under an umbrella on the deck of Luffy's ship.
After Dressrosa, Law was never supposed to see his crew again. That plan was thrown out the window by a certain straw-hatted pirate, and now he's hitching a ride to Zou with this absolute circus that is Luffy's crew.
It's been a week since Law came aboard, and the more he looks, things get weirder and weirder. Specifically, their chef.
The first time they met, the man was well-mannered, minus his attitude towards women and cigarette habit. However, Law finds him ever more strange after every interaction they have on the Sunny.
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The first time Law notices something off is when he happens on Sanji in the galley. He understands being awake in the wee hours of the night, but not like this.
Law finds the man still fully dressed in his three-piece at three in the morning, sitting - no, crouching - on his chair and poring over a cookbook. His cigarette dangles loosely from his mouth as he mutters something unintelligible to himself and brings his knees together to rest his chin on top of them.
What the fuck, Law thinks, and as if the chef heard his internal monologue, a blonde head whips around to face him standing at the door.
Sanji's wide-eyed, slightly disheveled face stares back at him, and his neck is uncomfortably craned so he can look directly at Law. The pair look at each other awkwardly, and after a moment of silence he just...closes the door.
This is not Law's ship. It is none of his business, and he will go back to the men's quarters to sleep.
-----
This keeps happening the longer Law stays on Luffy's ship, and every day he notices how rarely the Sunny's resident cook takes a break. In addition to that, he also can't help but notice exactly how Sanji chooses to rest.
Whether he's chatting with Robin in the library the lawn or napping with the swordsman on the lawn, it's always with one leg up on the seat, both slung over the back of a chair, or contorted into a position that shouldn't be humanly possible.
Law finds it mildly concerning, but no one else on the crew seems to mind when Sanji stops bustling for half a second and decides to perch himself somewhere (not unlike a gargoyle, Law thinks), so he leaves it alone.
---
Once, he spots the chef sleeping on deck with Zoro, but... upside down. As in, the swordsman is leaning on the mast and Sanji is resting his feet on Zoro's shoulders while his back is on the ground. It looks extremely uncomfortable. He also spots Zoro crack open his eye to peer down at the man, before closing it with a very resigned expression on his face and a light dusting of pink on his cheeks.
Again, this is not his ship and Law most certainly does not want to open that can of worms right now. He leaves the two in peace and hopes they figure it out by themselves.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ik its not the best but this has been in my drafts for like a week and if i dont post it now im gonna forget about it for like three months so... you guys can have it yeah !! i didn't proofread this either so please lmk if there are mistakes
ANYWAYS Spawned a brand new hc that bc Sanji was locked up for like 5 years he had to teach himself stuff and develops the muscle memory for it wrong and just self-corrects in front of other ppl after learning the right way to do it. i might explore that in a longer fic at a later date, we'll see.
ALSO!!!! by popular demand(read: one person) im gonna start posting on my ao3 soon. you can find it here and all my zosan ficlets will be compiled into a series soon! watch out for that yall
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abbysdruidess · 1 year ago
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𝙞𝙩 𝙨𝙡𝙞𝙥𝙥𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙝𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝 𝙢𝙮 𝙝𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙨 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙖 𝙨𝙝𝙖𝙙𝙤𝙬, 𝙡𝙞𝙠𝙚 𝙖 𝙙𝙧𝙚𝙖𝙢 - 𝘼𝙗𝙗𝙮 𝘼𝙣𝙙𝙚𝙧𝙨𝙤𝙣 𝙨𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙢𝙖𝙩𝙚 𝙖𝙪
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wc: 2.1k
summary: You and Abby meet by chance in the WLF stadium, quickly becoming enamoured with each other. Little do you know, you had met a long time ago in similar circumstances.
tags: angst, slight fluff, suggestive themes, Abby is a soldier in this one, mentions of major character deaths, one use of y/n, previous life soulmates, badly proofread
a/n: as promised, this was the most asked fic from the voting pole - by the way, 250 is INSANE. It's incredible to see so many ppl engage engage with my work.
The title is a line from the Odyssey, bc these classes have to pay for themselves at some point. I listened to Rachel's Song from Blade Runner for about 100 times while writing it, and I suggest listening to it yourself to be fully immersed in the experience<33
Stay tuned bc the cuddling headcanons will drop a day after this one! And lmk if you'd like to see a pt 2 of this universe<3
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one
 The moonlight caressed your lover’s face gently, casting a serene glow over her as she laid next to you. You wondered whether she could feel your gaze on her, as her eyes were closed, appearing as though she was sleeping. You knew her better than that though, knew that whenever she slept, the banes of reality took over and she had a hard time enjoying her slumber. She rarely looked this peaceful.
 Suddenly, her eyes shot open and shot a playful, wicked look at you before grabbing you by the hips and flipping you, now laying on your back as she straddled you. You giggled as you felt her long, silky wisps of blonde hair tickling your neck. 
“Heeeyy” You groaned at her antics. You felt tired, unreasonably so, and perhaps another night you would’ve said nothing but curl next to her and fall asleep in her arms. Tonight though, you felt different, a deep seated instinct telling you to sit with her, cherish her, for you always had time for her but never enough.
“S’ wrong, babe? You looked pretty interested there, see something you like?” Her hands reached up and pinned your arms above the bed, her face mere inches away from yours. It would be pretty easy to reach up and steal a kiss from her pink, plump lips. 
“Of course, dear. I always do.” She lets go of your hands and helps you up, so you’re both sitting on the bed, bathed in the moonlight with the soft breeze that blows in through the window traversing through your hair. You wrap your arms around her waist and lean into her, basking in her pine scent and leaving soft, butterfly kisses on her neck. You feel her guttural sound of pleasure through her skin as she wraps her arms around your tighter.
“What’s on your mind, babe? Been acting weird all day.” She rubbed her hand down your back, as if encouraging you to go on, lay your frustration on her so she could console you with sweet words, then lie back down again and make you forget all about it. 
You visibly tensed up, feeling your hands curling into fists and your breath hitch. “You know what I’m talking about. We’ve talked about this before, dear.”
“Babe I’ve-”
“What you do isn’t safe.” You pull back to look her in the eyes, and her expression reveals it all; grief, regret, yearning. A frown had curled on her face at the mention of the job she had chosen back when she was younger and careless. “I-I know we’ve talked about this so much. But I’m scared of losing you more than I am of anything else. I’m not asking you to stay at home all the time, but I’d be happier knowing that you’re out of harm's way.”
Her career field was known for its heavy casualties-working for the military was no walk in the park, that’s for sure. Part of you wanted her to always be with you, remain in this room forever watching the sunrise and sunset, the season changing. You wouldn't yearn for anything else; just you and Her, intertwined so intimately with one another that your soul merged with hers into one. 
However, you knew that she also sought out the danger herself; she was an adrenaline junkie, and years of combat training had turned her into a genuine war machine, one that was highly requested on the battlefield. She couldn’t help it, to put it simply. To you however, she was the most loving, endearing wife you could ask for. You’d wait for millenia if you knew she’d come home to you, safe and unharmed, longing to cook her dinner and curl up on the couch together.
 Back in the present, you heard her sigh. The knot on your neck became more prominent, and you tried to mentally shoo it away. You’d hate yourself for crying. As she felt your distress, she reached to tuck you back into the space between her neck and her shoulder. 
“I know you’re scared for me, baby. I want you to know that I’ll never forgive myself for making you worry so much for me-you don’t deserve that. Please-please know I’ll always be alright.” She began to stroke your hair, trying to ease you out of your anxious state. She shifted with you in her arms, and you looked up at her in a deep state of thought, as if gathering the proper words for a confession. Finally, she gazed at you with a pained expression, cursing herself for bringing you in such obvious melancholy.
“I have something to tell you.”She uttered, inspecting your face for any sign of tears. Instead she found you looking composed, accepting even. Like whatever it was she was about to tell you, you had come to terms with it. Because you weren’t mad at her-heaven knows you never have been. Perhaps sullen at the cruel humor of fate and the games it had entangled you in.
“You’ve been deployed” You whisper softly, revealing her imminent departure like a well kept secret. She gasps, unsure of what to say. Her azure eyes start to swim in tears, confirming your words more than anything she could say. It wasn’t all that unfamiliar to you. Sooner all later, she would pack her things and travel to some vile hellhole, passing out orders and writing you letters that would be delivered within a month’s notice. And you’d always read them carefully, savoring any segment that was so very her like the finest of wines. You’d remind yourself to be patient, and that good things come to those who wait. 
“How did you find out?” She stumbles, seeking a way to comfort you, to let you know that everything’s gonna be alright even if it’s not.
“The-the letter that came in the mail yesterday. You left it on the coffee table and I-” You can’t bring yourself to go on. What’s done is done anyway. 
“Baby” She cups both your cheeks in her hands, trying to decipher your expression. “Are you angry at me?” You gesture no with your head, your eyes cast downwards in her chest, where a locket rested in between her breasts. 
“M’ not mad. Just, you know, I’ll miss ya.” You reach up to toy with the pendant, rubbing small shapes with your fingers on its cold, metallic surface. She flicks it open and a picture of your wedding day greets you, smiling fondly at the memory. 
“Hey” She starts, “I’ll be back before you know it.” She lies down on the bed, taking you with her, as you lay your face on her pillow, so close your noses bump in a small eskimo kiss. “Don’t I always come back to you?”
You inch closer to her, dipping your hand under her shirt to feel the rhythmic sound of her heartbeat. Right now, as she lied close to you, she had never felt more alive, more vibrant. No matter the circumstances, she always came back to you, one way or another.
“Yeah” You whisper, as you are lulled into a dreamless sleep. “Yeah, you do.”
two
The two aforementioned lovers never met again. For the rest of their lives, they remained in a constant state of yearning for one another, always looking out for the day they would rejoice and celebrate in each other’s arms. It seems however, that that day never came, and their souls couldn’t reconcile. Time after time, the story of the two lovers became partially forgotten, although as tragic as it was, it was no better than the condition of the rest of the world. And seemingly, one could even consider them lucky, for they never had to witness the Cordyceps pandemic of ‘13 and its hellish aftermath. All things considered, surviving in that kind of world would be easy, were they with each other. 
It was in this world that you and Abby met each other, having somehow persevered through all its trials and tribulations; you met her a year or so after she lost her father, and you had just joined the WLF. Somehow, your presence provided much needed comfort to the lone Wolf, and she made sure to look after you in return. The relationship was nothing short of a match made in heaven, as you and Abby understood each other perfectly, more than words could ever yearn to accurately express. 
Sooner or later, you fell into a routine; you would wake up alongside each other, usually laid bare due to last night’s amorous activities, and you’d make her coffee to earn her a few more precious moments of sleep. Once she was out and about, she’d tell you about her daily schedule, and take some time to complain about the endless workload Isaac had encompassed her in. You’d listen solemnly, telling her to stay safe during work and be mindful of her surroundings-you could never bring yourself to utter the famous WLF moto, especially not to her. It felt… strangely macabre.
 At nights, Abby would return, and you would take care of any fresh injuries, or changing the bandages in old ones, always leaving small kisses on them once healed because it elicited quiet giggles out of her. If she wasn’t too exhausted, you’d then make love, slow and passionate and relishing the moment of it all.
 You’d be forever grateful for finding Abby, as she filled you with so much endearment at the smallest gestures, like when she slow danced in the kitchen in the middle of the night with you or when she brought back an antique pendant found in one of her patrols. You kissed her thank you’s for the gift, and turned around so she could put it on you.
 “Lemme see” She muttered as you turned around, and she caught the sight of it between your breasts. “Hmm” She buried her face in the side of your neck. “Looks lovely on you, baby”.
 A couple of years into your relationship, you attended a celebration for the yearly harvest that had turned out exceptionally plentiful. You sat in one of the stadium seats, listening to Jordan and Manny recount a hilarious incident from patrol. You listened to their drunken jabbers, more amused in their hysterical antics than anything. 
Abby watched you from afar, pleased that you seemed content, sipping on some recently fermented beer someone in the stadium had made. It was pretty unpleasant and bitter, but it managed to get her buzzed. 
She suddenly sensed movement on her left and turned around abruptly, coming face to face with Owen. He gave her a noncommittal, friendly smile, holding a glass of something dark and sparkling himself. She smiled back nonchalantly, uninterested in striking a conversation with him. Although there was a part of her that loved him with a sense of brotherly affection, she was still hurt from the way he dealt with her while they were together, always treating her like some afterthought, the butt of a joke she wasn’t privy to. Still, it’s like they were friends.
 “Nice night tonight. Never seen so many people drinking together.” He commented and followed her gaze as she agreed absentmindedly-then followed her gaze back to you. Owen felt slightly resentful of the way she gazed at you, grinning at you enamored, spellbound. 
“You and y/n seem to be getting along well.” He muttered, reaching for a sip of his drink. “Never thought I’d see the day Abigail Anderson would end up whipped.” He joked, gauging for her reaction. Abby felt her face warm up at his words. She never hesitated to admit just how much she loved you, but she had never wondered what others thought of your relationship. 
“Yeah, I-I’m just, you know. It feels strange to me, too. Being so close to a person.” She stared straight ahead, watching as you laughed along with Manny at Jordan’s beer soaked face. She had no idea why she was confessing this to Owen, but he was one of the few people that knew her so well. “It just…comes very instinctively. I never thought I’d have something like that in me.” She gulped the last remnants of her drink from her cup. After her dad’s death, all Abby was filled with was pain and destruction. Your mere presence had been the antidote for her suffering. She’d never felt better.
“I guess we’ll never know where it comes from.” He shrugged casually, trying not to visibly react at her words. 
“Yeah” She muttered. “I guess.”
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meiusoo-twistedtwst · 11 months ago
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Twst as Lana Del Rey Songs
I tried my best…so many different choices, please keep in mind that probably all of them would likely have multiple songs that represent them well or even share songs, either way this is all just for fun so yeah!!
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🐉: the whole song is apparently about death & love coming together, sleep=death, love= his relationships with the other characters
🦇: his whole life changed once he met Silver & Malleus
⚔️: it’s a song abt going/finding home
🐊: rlly difficult choice but this feels right- cherished every memory w/ his found fam (mostly) as his life is on the line during chapter 7, seems to carry bits & pieces of them to stay strong
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💀: in the name + the verses are abt the way things were with someone (the way things rlly were w/ Ortho) & the chorus was all thinking abt how things could’ve gone (Idia wishes Ortho had never overblotted)
🤖: Idia almost always says yes to him, hence the lyrics. He watches over Idia & is his heaven😔
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👑: he literally fears turning old + it’s apart of a movie soundtrack.
🏹: he loves everything & everyone, wants to live in the moment
🍎: similar to Ride, but seems to be abt how you can choose whether to be happy or sad, Epel could have overpowered his stubbornness if he originally tried adapting into Pomefiore
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☀️: his money protects him, sure, but the world’s problems will eventually catch up to him-displays his naivety
🐍: lyrics kinda sound like he’d be lamenting over his losses right before Azul turns his “live stream” on)
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🐙: he seems all nice & genuine until you realize he’s a mafia boss-
🍄: abt desire, longing, hedonism, the allure of the unknown- the lyrics themselves just straightforward, it’s all Jade-coded
🦈: his constant pursuit of hedonism
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🦁: he was actually happy in Savanaclaw this whole time, but kept chasing aft the crown even tho happiness was right beside him
🍩: bec of that 1 verse that’s like “we don’t need money, we can make it all work” but the guy leaves to go make money anyways
🐺: the song is abt self-expression, self-assurance, & inner power- very Jack mentality
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🌹: it describes his relationship w/ his mom & how he wants ppl to comfort him
☘️: he feels trapped w/ defending Riddle, also the revealer of his evil mom, lyrics show a hint of his sadist side, & he turned a blind eye to Riddle’s early tyranny, hence the storyline that goes w/ all the lyrics
♦️: abt living in the moment, appreciating ppl ard him. Love vs. ambitions, kinda sounds like someone trying to fit in
♥️: bec he’s no good for me:p + I feel the lyrics could literally describe his way of life & some of his morals
♠️: literally Deuce’s song😭😭!! Song abt starting over & self-discovery
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ca-suffit · 4 months ago
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“that was part of ppl being concerned for sam reid's mental health that felt ridic too…”
in response to this para. it makes sense that ppl are expressing concern abt sam when he’s the one who was seemingly driven offline by whatever he saw, and is afaik the only one there who has expressed that shit he saw impacted his mental health. ofc ppl are gna be sad abt that and feel apologetic and reflect on the fact that a space they’re a part of caused him to feel that way even if they themselves weren’t the ones being hurtful. from what i’ve seen on twitter the lesson ppl have been taking from this is that ppl need to be more mindful abt what they say abt the entire cast, not just sam. and yh he is white, but he had ppl people hoping he would have abuse allegations made against him, ppl saying he was holding jacob and bailey hostage during s1 and that’s still fucked. i don’t think it’s so much a current concern for sam bc as you said he’s not online. but more so general regret and a reminder that just bc someone seems online doesn’t mean they aren’t and if you wouldn’t feel comfortable with them seeing it then you probably shouldn’t say it
not diminishing the real part about this being a strain on him, but sam and other white cast members are the only ones who could mention their mental health and get sympathy in the first place from the fandom as a whole. this wouldn't even have been noticed like this if any of the black or brown actors said it. jacob's talked about his mental health stuff in relation to louis and that's barely ever mentioned. if sam said that about lestat it'd be a daily post here still. even for this, this is gonna last for years here. honestly if (fandom) ppl were surprised by this fandom being awful, they haven't been paying attention. the stories I could tell off anon would prbly fucking kill ppl. why do u think I'm even here. if anyone of the cast and crew ever wants to know in depth shit, they can make attempts to contact me (this is never going to seriously happen btw, god forbid they miss another autumn brown instead or w/e). cuz I bet none of them even know half of it tbh. if they did, they wouldn't be playing nice with the ppl they do. doing that makes it worse for the rest of us and we're not celebrities that anyone cares about. not that I expect sam to know this shit but some motherfucker should have a job focused on this if they're gonna be highlighting ppl from this fandom like they've been doing.
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black-lake · 2 years ago
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birth chart red flags?
who's red flags tho? my red flags can be someone’s green flags. I try to avoid answering these questions because for one I dislike putting people in a box and seeing things as either bad or good in astrology. It's always both. some of the perceived best aspects can be used in the worst ways and some of the labeled bad can be life changing and admirable.
thus I can only speak from personal experience, with ppl that I met, which isn't enough to make any conclusions at all because I also meet others with the same placement that embody the positive side of it, this is just when others use it in an immature way. also most of my red flags are related to lying cuz I'm a bs detector lol. 
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birth chart red flags
there are some signs that I like in women but not men, like libra sun/moon, scorpio moon, and pisces moon men (can still apply to all). if they don't know their worth or how to deal with this energy they can be emotionally manipulative, liars and have weak egos, constantly looking for attention and validation even if it takes hurting someone or deceiving them. I get a bit wary of too much libra or venus aspects in men, unless they have earth or fire placements to balance it out. their masculine chasing approach contradicts the receiving feminine energy of venus and they may go about it in a toxic way.  
moon conjunct/opposite neptune especially if the moon is in an air or water sign. again, lying and faking things may be a habit here. I noticed they pick it up when young as a way to escape punishment and get validation from their mom or parental figure. moon and neptune conjoining clouds the native's vision, seeing themselves how they like or how others like, kinda delusional and low key believe their lies. they're easily deceived by others that show them fake love but ignore the ones that tell them the truth. they deny or refuse to take accountability for the mistakes they make and take the truth as a personal attack.
personal planets in the 7th house, (i see them as tarot cards reversed), especially sun/moon/mercury/mars, being too influenced by other people's opinions, putting on a mask and pleasing others too much. you don't know if they're genuine or talking shit behind your back. indecisiveness when making decisions and changing their minds too much. can be cheaters and manipulators because they're needy. they can be copycats doing what is wanted to be seen not what they themselves like.
chiron in the 1st, 3rd, 7th, 10th, 11th house. it's actually sad because it's a challenge for these people to express themselves. they have wounds relating to how others see them or judge them so they may hide and put on a mask. even though I have this, I become a bit hesitant when I see it in a chart because they can either be empowered healers or need to be healed first. 
moon conjunct/opposite mars, or in aries, especially in a fire or water sign. they may have anger issues, be explosive, aggressive and selfish. too stubborn to admit they're wrong. they may even use violence and impulsively hurt others.
moon conjunct/opposite pluto can be explosive too, hide their emotions, be jealous and vengeful, can hurt others if they act on their emotions and refuse to forgive and heal. pluto conjunct/opposite personal planets and ascendant are aspects I pay close attention to as well, can show behaviors like being too controlling, demanding, aggressive and manipulative. 
scorpio stelliums, even though one of my fav signs, you never know what you'll get with them. they're just too unpredictable and secretive so you gotta step up your analytical skills and figure out whether they care for you or are plotting against you. it's an adventure that can get you destroyed so gl. 
these are a few I remembered. but most importantly I never focus on one aspect that has been labeled bad and judge based on it. I look at the whole chart, take all those links between the planets, all that magic happening in the skies to form this unique chart, mix them together, see how they balance each other and what magical formula comes from it, that's the beauty of astrology. I just put my observations on the back of my mind and let the person present themselves, that's what gives me real life facts.
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aydaptic · 1 year ago
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Sorry if you've already answered this before but I'm new to the fandom and I found your account through your web-comic and I was wondering what is it about Gavin that you like so much? Why is he one of your favourite characters in dbh? (I've noticed that he isn't much of a fan-favourite in this fandom 😔)
This'll be a long post, but you asked (...and I'll happily answer!) I'll add some descriptions for context. At the top of my head, I can think of 21 reasons why I like his canon equivalent.
1. He's charismatic
Gav gives off an energy that makes it easy to hang onto his every word. I can quote all his lines by heart and I like listening to Neil Newbon (in this specific role) talk. I remember some of Kamski's lines as well -- also mo-capped/voice acted by Newbon -- but Kamski doesn't have nearly as much charisma as Gav does.
2. He's expressive
Ppl who 'talk with their hands' are more charismatic. Gav is all over the place in the break room if you stick around. Hand gestures capture people's attention as they emphasize what is being said.
3. He doesn't think androids are alive (...so in his eyes, the way he treats them isn't wrong)
"Could always try roughin' it up a little. After all... it's not human." - Gavin Reed, The Interrogation
That means he wouldn't rough up a human suspect. This alone justifies his unpleasant attitude towards androids. Hank -- who treated Connor way worse than Gav ever did -- changed his mind. Nothing says Gav can't do the same.
If Alexa suddenly said she was alive, the vast majority wouldn't take it seriously (if any at all.)
4. He's sarcastic
"Congratulations on last night, very impressive." - Gavin Reed, Waiting For Hank...
5. He has dark humor
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6. He looks down on people that pay for s*x
Quote above. You don't call someone a "pervert" if you agree with their actions. The Eden Club, in particular, is immoral AF... bc those androids don't have a choice. Gav doesn't care about them being androids, but he still looks down on the guy who paid money to get laid, and I applaud Gav for that. Especially when said guy also had a wife and kids.
7. He has valid concerns about androids taking jobs
Anyone who says differently is either in denial, uninformed, or never had a job they were scared to get fired from. There's already been an uproar about ChatGPT and that's nothing compared to how advanced Detroit: Become Human androids are. The unemployment rate in this game is 37% -- higher than it was during the Great Depression and C*VID -- and androids are the main cause.
I've seen a lot of ppl ask this question:
Q: Why not just buy an android and have them do your job for you, then? You get the money anyway bc it's your android!
A: Bc, believe it or not, the vast majority of men want to work. This is a strange concept to grasp for a lot of ppl. I admire Gav for being one of those men who wants to do it themselves. Letting someone else do your job is taking the easy way out.
8. He's a hard worker
Gallery: "...Ruthlessly ambitious, Reed will do anything to advance his career, even if it means treading on other peoples’ toes."
9. He's ambitious
See the quote above.
10. He doesn't sleep well
This isn't just a headcanon. He has literal bags under his eyes. Just knowing he doesn't sleep well already has me asking, "why?" It's interesting.
11. He puts his feet on the table
After Connor interacts with him in the break room, Gav will go to his desk and do this. I'll go into detail about why this contributes to my liking his character in the very last point.
12. He calls Hank out on his alcoholism
As much as most of us love Hank, he's not in a good space mentally. Showing up drunk/hungover to work should not be tolerated. It not only puts coworkers, but also civilians, at risk. Hank should be in therapy instead of working at the DPD until he gets his life sorted out.
13. He calls Fowler out for giving Hank special treatment
"You won't get away with it this time." - Gavin Reed, The Interrogation (after Hank pulls a literal gun on a human coworker AKA Gav)
So Gav has brought it up to Fowler before and is about to do it again. Ties into the point above. What Hank does -- like assaulting a literal FBI agent -- shouldn't be tolerated.
14. He's a control freak
I gravitate towards ppl and characters who take charge. Those who like being in control and know what they're doing. I'm a control freak myself, but I'd prefer to let someone else take the reins as long as I agree with their methods. I like it when ppl know what they want and act on it. Gav does both.
15. He's protective of his coworkers
I was unsure whether or not to add this as I guess it can be seen as a subjective theory and not an objective fact.
Gav only ever steps in with the gun in The Interrogation when Con uses aggressive force on Chris Miller by tearing him away from the deviant. Con did this after disobeying Gav 3 times. So yeah. Gav is justified for stepping in. Hank, on the other hand, isn't justified for pulling a gun on a human coworker. I see this scene as Gav protecting Chris from Con who is showing signs of deviancy.
16. He can't wink
Endearing.
17. He pouts a lot
Again, endearing.
18. He swears like a sneezing kitten
Same as the two points above.
19. He doesn't like Connor
I don't like Con, either. Yeah. We exist. Personality types like Con's "let's be friends" attitude and constant positivity pisses me off. Before anyone comments that the player decides Con's personality... no. Only to an extent. There are several instances where the player has no say whatsoever. Some of Con's pre-determined responses annoy me.
20. He has great fashion
Big fan of leather jackets.
21. I like him bc I'm a narcissist at times
He's essentially the male equivalent of me to the T. I'm only an asshole internally, though. We love (or hate) characters we relate to. I relate to every single point except 17 and 18 on this list.
There you go :)
His OOC fanon equivalent has a huge fanbase -- especially on Twitter/X and Tumblr turning him into a blushing teenage girl -- but it seems like I'm the only person who can't stand that OOC portrayal of him. That said, I adore his canon equivalent in all his asshole glory.
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use this to talk about soft vore?
i wanna know how it can be soft or comforting pls tell me
oh my god my first anon
yes! yes i will! im actually kinda in the mood for soft comforting stuff rn so this is perfect
btw warning you now this is gonna be incredibly self indulgent (hope its not too much lol)
also i wrote this w/ g/t in mind
AAAHHH i love soft preds… maybe the prey’s having a rough day and just wants to chill, so the pred picks them up in a hand, peppering their small body with kisses, humming at their taste.. they just wanna make their prey happy! they get all squirmy, asking to be eaten so they can rest, so the pred slips them into their mouth, softly biting and tasting them, pushing them oh so softly around with their tongue, just savoring them and hoping the soft pressure calms the prey down. maybe they sit there for a bit, soaking up the nice feelings and the warmth of their pred’s mouth, comforting in ways they can't express. they lay on the pred’s soft tongue, feeling drool pile up around them, signaling the need to swallow.
hesitantly but sure the pred carefully presses the prey up to the top of their mouth, swallowing their drool that tastes like their friend, then the prey themselves.. the prey just melts at the touch, slowly making it down the pred’s throat, pressing into their body like a reassuring, full-body hug.. they savor every feeling, trying not to squirm and risk it being too much for their partner, finally slipping into the stomach. there they stretch out(hearing the pred hum in delight at the feeling), getting comfy and curling up against the so, so soft stomach walls like a cat. the prey feels saliva sticking to their clothes and hair, something that would usually be gross if it wasn't a reminder of how much they are cared for, how much they are loved, to be as close to someone as they ever could be. the prey lets a smile creep onto their features, hearing the pred mumble something about how perfect they taste, how wonderful they feel inside, how ethereal their movements feel, how fucking amazing and loved they are.. the prey digs a hand into the folds of the pred’s stomach, rubbing back in a non-verbal way of saying yes, of thank you, of i love you. maybe the pred purrs- they really needed this too, didn't they? the pred’s stomach churns around them softly, another feeling reminiscent of a hug that just makes the prey’s face go all warm. they hear their friend’s heart beat softly in time with their own, the comforting sound of their breaths luring them to a drowsy, half asleep state, the temperature reminding them of fresh blankets just out of the dryer or a nice warm bath. the soft gurgles around them only comfort them instead of worry them, knowing that their pred would never ever dream of hurting them, knowing they only want them to feel better- which has definitely been accomplished by now. the prey drifts off to the sound of quiet praise and the feeling of belly rubs from the inside, too tired to keep doing it themself, feeling so goddamn loved.
maybe later the prey gets a mini bath in the sink once they're out, pred washing them off with soap, making sure everything’s out of their hair and clothes, wrapping them up in a warm washcloth and holding them in their hand or on the pred’s chest, staring down at the prey with adoration obvious in their features. they can tell everything they did helped both parties, already planning when they could both do it again some time.
AAAHHH SORRY I GOT REALLY SAPPY THERE… platonic and romantic vore just gets me… im a sucker for soft shit like this, its what got me into vore in the first place lol- the soft touches and nonverbal reassurance is just so sweet to me, its such a show of how much ppl care abt one another, to keep someone safe INSIDE OF THEM, WHERE THEY’RE AS CLOSE AS THEY CAN BE TO EACH OTHER??? HOW IS THAT NOT ADORABLE.
PEOPLE PLS FEEL FREE TO ASK FOR MORE I LOVE WRITING/TALKING ABOUT VORE!!!!
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